,a ,roman ,lawyer in ,jerusalem ,first ,century ,by ,w4,w4 ,story ,a ,,roman ,,lawyer ,,in ,,jerusalem ,marcus1 abiding in ,jerusalem1 ,greeting to ,caius1 his best friend in ,rome6 ,salve6 these presents will be borne to you ,by ,lucius1 who is wearied with this place1 ,sated with travel1 looks upon the ,east ,as simply hateful--blazing1 barren1 bleak1 ,and longs again to find himself in ,rome1 ,after the tumult of its streets1 its trains ,of slaves and clients1 and its villas cool ,with marble porticoes beside the sea1 ,and friends and banquets--more than all1 its games-- ,this life seems blank and flat4 ,he pants to stand ,in its vast circus all alive with heads ,and quivering arms and floating robes--the air ,thrilled by the roaring fremitus of men-- ,the sunlit awning heaving overhead1 ,swollen and strained against its corded veins ,and flapping out its hem with loud report-- ,the wild beasts roaring from the pit below-- ,the wilder crowd responding from above ,with one long yell that sends the startled blood ,with thrill and sudden flush into the cheeks-- ,a hundred trumpets screaming--the dull thump ,of horses galloping across the sand-- ,the clang of sabbards1 the sharp clash of steel-- ,live swords1 that whirl a circle of grey fire-- ,brass helmets flashing 'neath their streaming hair-- ,a universal tumult--then a hush ,worse than the tumult--all eyes staining down ,to the arena's pit--all lips set close-- ,all muscles strained--and then that sudden yell1 ,habet6--,that's ,rome1 says ,lucius6 so it is6 ,that is1 'tis his ,rome--'tis not yours and mine4 ,and yet1 great ,jupiter here at my side1 ,he stands with face aside as if he saw ,the games he thus describes1 and says1 ,that's life6 ,life6 life6 my friend1 and this is simply death6 ,ah6 for my ,rome6 ,i jot his very words ,just as he utters them4 ,i hate these games1 ,and ,darius knows it1 yet he will go on1 ,and all against my will he stirs my blood-- ,i suspend my letter for a while4 ,a walk has calmed me--,i begin again-- ,letting this last page1 since it is written1 stand4 ,lucius is going3 you will see him soon ,in our great ,forum1 there with him will walk1 ,and hear him rail and rave against the ,east4 ,i stay behind--for these bare silences1 ,these hills that in the sunset melt and burn1 ,this proud stern people1 these dead seas and lakes1 ,these sombre cedars1 this intense still sky1 ,to me1 o'erwearied with life's din and strain1 ,are grateful as the solemn blank of night ,after the fierce day's irritant excess2 ,besides1 a deep absorbing interest ,detains me here1 fills up my mind1 and sways ,my inmost thoughts--has got1 as 'twere a gripe ,upon my very life1 as strange as new4 ,i scarcely know how well to speak of this1 ,fearing your raillery at best--at worst ,even your contempt2 yet1 spite of all1 ,i speak4 ,first1 do not deem me to have lost my head1 ,sunstruck1 as that man ,paulus was at ,rome4 ,no1 ,i am sane as ever1 and my pulse ,beats even1 with no fever in my blood4 ,and yet ,i half incline to think his words1 ,wild as they were1 were not entirely wild4 ,nay1 shall ,i dare avow it8 ,i half tend1 ,here in this place1 surrounded by these men-- ,despite the jeering natural at first1 ,and then the pressure of my life-long thought ,trained up against it--to excuse his faith1 ,and half admit the ,christus he thinks ,god ,is1 at the least1 a most mysterious man4 ,bear with me if ,i now avow so much3 ,when next we meet ,i will expose my mind1 ,but now the subject ,i must scarcely touch4 ,how many a time1 while sauntering up and down ,the ,forum's space1 or pausing 'neath the shade ,of some grand temple1 arch1 or portico1 ,have we discussed some knotty point of law1 ,some curious case1 whose contradicting facts ,looked ,janus-faced to innocence and guilt4 ,i see you now arresting me1 to note ,with quiet fervor and uplifted hand ,some subtle view or fact by me o'erlooked1 ,and urging me1 who always strain my point 7,being too much1 ,i know1 a partisan71 ,to pause1 and press not to the issue so1 ,but more apart1 with less impetuous zeal1 ,survey as from an upper floor the facts4 ,i need you now to rein me in1 too quick ,to ride a whim beyond the term of ,truth1 ,for here a case comes up to which in vain ,i seek a clue3 you could clear up my mind1 ,but you are absent--so ,i send these notes4 ,the case is of one ,judas1 ,simon's son1 ,iscariot called--a ,jew--and one of those ,who followed ,christus1 held by some a god1 ,but deemed by others to have preached and taught ,a superstition vile1 of which one point ,was worship of an ass2 but this is false6 ,judas1 his follower1 all the sect declare1 ,bought by a bribe of thirty silver coins1 ,basely betrayed his master unto death4 ,the question is--,did ,judas1 doing this1 ,act from base motives and commit a crime8 ,or1 all things taken carefully in view1 ,can he be justified in what he did8 ,here on the spot1 surrounded by the men ,who acted in the drama1 ,i have sought ,to study out this strange and tragic case4 ,many are dead--as ,herod1 ,caiaphas1 ,and also ,pilate--a most worthy man1 ,under whose rule1 but all without his fault1 ,and1 as ,i fancy1 all against his will1 ,christus was crucified4 ,this ,i regret3 ,his words with me would have the greatest weight2 ,but ,lysias still is living1 an old man1 ,the chief of the ,centurions1 whose report ,is to be trusted1 as he saw and heard1 ,not once1 but many a time and oft1 this man4 ,his look and bearing1 ,lysias thus describes3 ,tall1 slender1 not erect1 a little bent2 ,brows arched and dark2 a high-ridged lofty head2 ,thin temples1 veined and delicate2 large eyes1 ,sad1 very serious1 seeming as it were ,to look beyond you1 and whene'er he spoke ,illumined by an inner lamping light-- ,at times1 too1 gleaming with a strange wild fire ,when taunted by the rabble in the streets2 ,a ,jewish face1 complexion pale but dark2 ,thin1 high-art nostrils1 quivering constantly2 ,long nose1 full lips1 hands tapering1 full of veins2 ,his movements nervous2 as he walked he seemed ,scarcely to heed the persons whom he passed1 ,and for the most part gazed upon the ground4 ,as for his followers1 ,i knew them all-- ,a strange mad set and full of fancies wild-- ,john1 ,peter1 ,james--and ,judas best of all-- ,all seemed to me good men without offence-- ,a little crazed--but who is wholly sane8 ,they went about and cured the sick and halt1 ,and gave away their money to the poor1 ,and all their talk was charity and peace4 ,if ,christus thought and said he was a god1 ',twas harmless madness1 not deserving death4 ,what most aroused the wealthy ,rabbis' rage ,was that he set the poor against the rich1 ,and cried that rich men all would go to hell1 ,and1 worst of all1 roundly denounced the priests1 ,with all their rich phylacteries and robes-- ,said they were hypocrites who made long prayers1 ,and robbed poor widows and devoured their means2 ,and were at best but whited sepulchres3 ,and this it was that brought him to the ,cross4 ,those who went with him and believed in him ,were mostly dull1 uneducated men1 ,simple and honest1 dazed by what he did1 ,and misconceiving every word he said4 ,he led them with him in a spell-bound awe1 ,and all his cures they called miraculous4 ,they followed him like sheep where'er he went1 ,with feelings mixed of wonder1 fear and love4 ,yes6 ,i suppose they loved him1 though they fled ,stricken with fear when we arrested him4 ,what6 all--all fled8 ,i asked4 ,did none remain8 ,not one1 he said--all left him to his fate1 ,not one dared own he was a follower-- ,not one gave witness for him of them all4 ,stop6 ,when ,i say not one of them1 ,i mean ,no one but ,judas--,judas whom they call ,the traitor--who betrayed him to his death4 ,he rushed into the council-hall and cried1 '',tis ,i have sinned--,christus is innocent4' ,and here ,i come to what of all ,i've heard ,most touched me--,i for this my letter write4 ,paulus1 you know1 had only for this man1 ,this ,judas1 words of scorn and bitter hate4 ,mark now the different view that ,lysias took1 ,when1 urged by me1 his story thus he told3 ,some say that ,judas was a base1 vile man ,who sold his master for the meanest bribe2 ,others again insist he was most right1 ,giving to justice one who merely sought ,to overthrow the ,church1 subvert the law1 ,and on its ruins build himself a throne4 ,i1 knowing ,judas--and none better knew-- ,i1 caring naught for ,christus more than him1 ,but hating lies1 the simple truth will tell1 ,no man can say ,i ever told a lie-- ,i am too old now to begin4 ,besides1 ,the truth is truth1 and let the truth be told4 ,judas1 ,i say1 alone of all the men ,who followed ,christus thought that he was ,god4 ,some feared him for his power of miracles2 ,some were attracted by a sort of spell2 ,some followed him to hear his sweet1 clear voice ,and gentle speaking1 hearing with their ears1 ,and knowing not the sense of what he said-- ,but one alone believed he was the ,lord1 ,the true ,messiah of the ,jews4 ,that one ,was ,judas--he alone of all the crowd4 ,he to betray his master for a bribe6 ,he last of all4 ,i say this friend of mine ,was brave when all the rest were cowards there4 ,his was a noble nature3 frank and bold1 ,almost to rashness bold1 yet sensitive1 ,who took his dreams for firm realities-- ,who once believing1 all in all believed-- ,rushing at obstacles and scorning risk1 ,ready to venture all to gain his end1 ,no compromise or subterfuge for him1 ,his act went from his thought straight to the butt2 ,yet with this ardent and impatient mood ,was joined a visionary mind that took ,impressions quick and fine1 yet deep as life4 ,therefore it was that in this subtle soil ,the master's words took root and grew and flowered4 ,he heard and followed and obeyed2 his faith was serious1 earnest1 real--winged to fly2 ,he doubted not1 like some who walked with him-- ,desired no first place1 as did ,james and ,john-- ,denied him not with ,peter3 not to him ,his master said1 ',away6 thou'rt an offence2 ,get thee behind me1 ,satan6'--not to him1 ',am ,i so long with ye who know me not8' ,fixed as a rock1 untempted by desires ,to gain the post of honor when his ,lord ,should come to rule--chosen from out the midst ,of six-score men as his apostle--then ,again selected to the place of trust1 ,unselfish1 honest1 he among them walked4 ,that he was honest1 and was so esteemed1 ,is plain from this--they chose him out of all ,to bear the common purse1 and take and pay4 ,john says he was a thief1 because he grudged ,the price that for some ointment once was paid1 ,and urged 'twere better given to the poor4 ,but did not ,christus ever for the poor ,lift up his voice--',give all things to the poor6 ,sell everything and give all to the poor6' ,and ,judas1 who believed1 not made believe1 ,used his own words1 and ,christus1 who excused ,the gift because of love1 rebuked him not4 ,thief6 ay1 he 'twas1 this very thief1 they chose ,to bear the purse and give alms to the poor4 ,i1 for my part1 see nothing wrong in this4 ,but why1 if ,judas was a man like this1 ,frank1 noble1 honest--here ,i interposed-- ,why was it that he thus betrayed his ,lord8 ,this question oft did ,i revolve1 said he1 ,when all the facts were fresh1 and oft revolved ,in latter days1 and with no change of mind2 ,and this is my solution of the case3 ,daily he heard his master's voice proclaim1 ',i am the ,lord6 the ,father lives in me6 ,who knoweth me knows the eternal ,god6 ,he who believes in me shall never die6 ,no6 he shall see me with my angels come ,with power and glory here upon the earth ,to judge the quick and dead6 ,among you here ,some shall not taste of death before ,i come ,god's kingdom to establish on the earth6' ,what meant these words8 ,they seethed in ,judas' soul4 ,here is my ,god--,messias1 ,king of kings1 ,christus1 the ,lord--the ,saviour of us all4 ,how long shall he be taunted and reviled1 ,and threatened by this crawling scum of men8 ,oh1 who shall urge the coming of that day ,when he in majesty shall clothe himself ,and stand before the astounded world its ,king8' ,long brooding over this inflamed his soul1 ,and1 ever rash in schemes as wild in thought1 ,at last he said1 ',no longer will ,i bear ,this ignominy heaped upon my ,lord4 ,no man hath power to harm the ,almighty ,one4 ,ay1 let men's hands be lifted1 then at once1 ,effulgent like the sun1 swift like the sword1 ,the jagged lightning flashes from the cloud1 ,shall he be manifest--the living ,god-- ,and prostrate all shall on the earth adore6' ,such was his thought when at the passover ,the ,lord with his disciples met and supped3 ,and ,christus saw the trouble in his mind1 ,and said ',behold1 among you here is one ,that shall betray me--he to whom ,i give ,this sop1' and he the sop to ,judas gave2 ,and added--',that thou doest1 quickly do2' ,and ,judas left him1 hearing these last words-- ',now shall the ,son of man be glorified4' ,ah yes6 his master had divined his thought-- ,his master should be glorified through him4 ,straight unto me and the high priests he came1 ,filled with this hope1 and said1 ',behold me here1 ,judas1 a follower of ,christus6 ,come6 ,i will point out my master whom you seek6' ,and out at once they sent me with my band2 ,and as we went1 ,i said1 rebuking him1 ',how1 ,judas1 is it you who thus betray ,the ,lord and master whom you love1 to death8' ,and1 smiling1 then he answered1 ',fear you not ,do you your duty2 take no heed of me4' ',is not this vile8' ,i said2 ',i had not deemed ,such baseness in you4' ',though it seems so now1' ,still smiling he replied1 'wait till the end4' ,then turning round as to himself he said1 ',now comes the hour that ,i have prayed to see-- ,the hour of joy to all who know the truth4' ',is this man mad8' ,i thought1 and looked at him2 ,and1 in the darkness creeping swiftly on1 ,his face was glowing1 almost shone with light2 ,and rapt as if in visionary thought ,he walked beside me1 gazing at the sky4 ,passing at last beyond the ,cedron brook ,we reached a garden on whose open gate ,dark vines were loosely swinging4 ,here we paused ,and lifted up our torches1 and beheld ,against the blank white wall a shadowy group1 ,there waiting motionless1 without a word2 ,a moment1 and with rapid1 nervous step ,judas alone advanced1 and1 as he reached ,the tallest figure lifted quick his head2 ,and crying1 ',master6 ,master6' kissed his cheek4 ,we1 knowing it was ,christus1 forward pressed4 ,malchus was at my side1 when suddenly ,a sword flashed out from one among them there1 ,and sheared his ear4 ,at once our swords flashed out1 ,but ,christus1 lifting up his hand1 said1 ',peace1 ,sheathe thy sword1 ,peter--,i must drink the cup4' ,and ,i cried also1 ',peace1 and sheathe your swords1' ,then on his arm ,i placed my hand1 and said1 ',in the law's name4' ,he nothing said1 but reached ,his arm out1 and we bound his hands with cords4 ,this done ,i turned1 but all the rest had fled1 ,and he alone was left to meet his fate4 ,my men ,i ordered then to take and bear ,their prisoner to the city2 and at once ,they moved away1 ,i1 seeing not our guide1 ,cried1 ',judas6' but no answer3 then a groan ,so sad and deep it startled me4 ,i turned1 ,and there against the wall1 with ghastly face1 ,and eyeballs starting in a frenzied glare1 ,as in a fit1 lay ,judas2 his weak arms ,hung lifeless down1 his mouth half open twitched1 ,his hands were clutched and clinched into his robes1 ,and now and then his breast heaved with a gasp4 ,frightened ,i dashed some water in his face1 ,spoke to him1 lifted him1 and rubbed his hands4 ,at last the sense came back into his eyes1 ,then with a sudden spasm fled again1 ,and to the ground he dropped4 ,i searched him o'er1 ,fearing some mortal wound1 yet none ,i found4 ,then with a gasp again the life returned1 ,and stayed1 but still with strong convulsion twitched4 ',speak1 ,judas6 ,speak6' ,i cried4 ,what does this mean8 ,no answer6 ',speak1 man6' ,then at last he groaned4 ',go1 leave me1 leave me1 ,lysias4 ,oh1 my ,god6 ,what have ,i done8 ,oh1 ,christus6 ,master1 ,lord4 ,forgive me1 oh1 forgive me6' ,then a cry ,of agony that pierced me to the heart1 ,as groveling on the ground he turned away ,and hid his face1 and shuddered in his robes4 ,was this the man whose face an hour ago ,shone with a joy so strange8 ,what means it all8 ,is this a sudden madness8 ',speak6' ,i cried4 ',what means this1 ,judas8 ,be a man and speak8' ,yet there he lay1 and neither moved nor spoke4 ,i thought that he had fainted1 till at last1 ,sudden he turned1 grasped my arm1 and cried1 ',say1 ,lysias1 is this true1 or am ,i mad8' ',what true8' ,i said4 ',true that you seized the ,lord6 ,you could not seize him--he is ,god the ,lord6 ,i thought ,i saw you seize him4 ,yet ,i know ,that was impossible1 for he is ,god6 ,and yet you live--you live4 ,he spared you1 then4 ,where am ,i8 what has happened8 ,a black cloud ,came o'er me when you laid your hands on him4 ,where are they all8 ,where is he8 ,lysias1 speak8' ',judas1' ,i said1 'what folly is all this8 ,christus my men have bound and borne away6 ,the rest have fled4 ,rouse now and come with me2 ,my men await me1 rouse yourself and come6' ,throwing his arms up1 in a fit he fell1 ,with a loud shriek that pierced the silent night4 ,i could not stay1 but1 calling instant aid1 ,we bore him quick to the adjacent house4 ,and placing him in kindly charge1 ,i left1 ,joining my men who stayed for me below4 ,straight to the high priest's house we hurried on1 ,and ,christus in an inner room we placed1 ,set at his door a guard1 and then came out4 ,after a time there crept into the hall ,where round the blazing coals we sat1 a man1 ,who in the corner crouched4 ',what man are you8' ,cried some one2 and ,i turning1 looked at him4 ',twas ,peter4 '',tis a fellow of that band ,that followed ,christus1 and believed in him4' '',tis false6' cried ,peter2 and he cursed and swore4 ',i know him not--,i never saw the man4' ,but ,i said nothing4 ,soon he went away4 ,that night ,i saw not ,judas4 ,the next day1 ,ghastly1 clay-white1 a shadow of a man1 ,with robes all soiled and torn1 and tangled beard1 ,into the chamber where the council sat ,came feebly staggering3 scarce should ,i have known ',twas ,judas1 with that haggard1 blasted face3 ,so had that night's great horror altered him4 ,as one all blindly walking in a dream ,he to the table came--against it leaned-- ,glared wildly round a while2 then1 stretching forth1 from his torn robes1 a trembling hand1 flung down1 ,as if a snake had stung him1 a small purse1 ,that broke and scattered its white coins about1 ,and1 with a shrill voice1 cried1 ',take back the purse ',twas not for that foul dross ,i did the deed-- ',twas not for that--oh1 horror6 not for that6 ,but that ,i did believe he was the ,lord2 ,and that he is the ,lord ,i still believe4 ,but oh1 the sin6--the sin6 ,i have betrayed ,the innocent blood1 and ,i am lost6--am lost6' ,so crying1 round his face his robes he threw1 ,and blindly rushed away2 and we1 aghast1 ,looked round--and no one for a moment spoke4 ,seeing that face1 ,i could but fear the end2 ,for death was in it1 looking through his eyes4 ,nor could ,i follow to arrest the fate ,that drove him madly on with scorpion whip4 ,at last the duty of the day was done1 ,and night came on4 ,forth from the gates ,i went1 ,anxious and pained by many a dubious thought1 ,to seek for ,judas1 and to comfort him4 ,the sky was dark with heavy lowering clouds2 ,a lifeless1 stifling air weighed on the world2 ,a dreadful silence like a nightmare lay ,crouched on its bosom1 waiting1 grim and grey4 ,in horrible suspense of some dread thing4 ,a creeping sense of death1 a sickening smell1 ,infected the dull breathing of the wind4 ,a thrill of ghosts went by me now and then1 ,and made my flesh creep as ,i wandered on4 ,at last ,i came to where a cedar stretched ,its black arms out beneath a dusky rock1 ,and1 passing through its shadow1 all at once ,i started2 for against the dubious light ,a dark and heavy mass that to and fro ,slung slowly with its weight1 before me grew4 ,a sick dread sense came over me2 ,i stopped-- ,i could not stir4 ,a cold and clammy sweat ,oozed out all over me2 and all my limbs1 ,bending with tremulous weakness like a child's1 ,gave way beneath me4 ,then a sense of shame ,aroused me4 ,i advanced1 stretched forth my hand ,and pushed the shapeless mass2 and at my touch ,it yielding swung--the branch above it creaked-- ,and back returning struck against my face4 ,a human body6 ,was it dead or not8 ,swiftly my sword ,i drew and cut it down1 ,and on the sand all heavily it dropped4 ,i plucked the robes away1 exposed the face-- ',twas ,judas1 as ,i feared1 cold1 stiff1 and dead2 ,that suffering heart of his had ceased to beat4 ,thus ,lysias spoke1 and ended4 ,i confess ,this story of poor ,judas touched me much4 ,what horrible revulsions must have passed ,across that spirit in those few last hours6 ,what storms1 that tore up life even to its roots6 ,say what you will--grant all the guilt--and still ,what pangs of dread remorse--what agonies ,of desperate repentance1 all too late1 ,in that wild interval between the crime ,and its last sad atonement6--life1 the while1 ,laden with horror all too great to bear1 ,and pressing madly on to death's abyss2 ,this was no common mind that thus could feel-- ,no vulgar villain sinning for reward6 ,was he a villain lost to sense of shame8 ,ay1 so say ,john and ,peter and the rest2 ,and yet--and yet this tale that ,lysias tells ,weighs with me more the more ,i ponder it2 ,for thus ,i put it3 ,either ,judas was1 ,as ,john affirms1 a villain and a thief1 ,a creature lost to shame and base at heart-- ,or else1 which is the view that ,lysias takes1 ,he was a rash and visionary man ,whose faith was firm1 who had no thought of crime1 ,but whom a terrible mistake drove mad4 ,take but ,john's view1 and all to me is blind4 ,call him a villain who1 with greed of gain1 ,for thirty silver pieces sold his ,lord4 ,does not the bribe seem all too small and mean8 ,he held the common purse1 and1 were he thief1 ,had daily power to steal1 and lay aside ,a secret and accumulating fund2 ,so doing1 he had nothing risked of fame1 ,while here he braved the scorn of all the world4 ,besides1 why chose they for their almoner ,a man so lost to shame1 so foul with greed8 ,or why1 from some five-score of trusted men1 ,choose him as one apostle among twelve8 ,or why1 if he were known to be so vile1 7,and who can hide his baseness at all times87 ,keep him in close communion to the last8 ,naught in his previous life1 or acts1 or words1 ,shows this consummate villain that1 full-grown1 ,leaps all at once to such a height of crime4 ,again1 how comes it that this wretch1 whose heart ,is eased to shame1 flings back the paltry bribe8 ,and1 when he knows his master is condemned1 ,rushes in horror out to seek his death8 ,whose fingers pointed at him in the crowd8 ,did all men flee his presence till he found ,life too intolerable8 ,nay2 not so6 ,death came too close upon the heels of crime1 ,he had but done what all his tribe deemed just3 ,all the great mass--,i mean the upper class-- ,the ,rabbis1 all the ,pharisees and ,priests ,ay1 and the lower mob as well who cried1 ,give us ,barabbas6 ,christus to the cross6 ,these men were all of them on ,judas's side1 ,and ,judas had done naught against the law4 ,were he this villain1 he had but to say1 ,i followed ,christus till ,i found at last ,he aimed at power to overthrow the ,state4 ,i did the duty of an honest man4 ,i traitor6 you are traitors who reprove4 ,besides1 such villains scorn the world's reproof4 ,or he might say--,you call this act a crime8 ,what crime was it to say ,i know this man8 ,i said no ill of him4 ,if crime there be1 ',twas yours who doomed him unto death1 not mine4 ,a villain was he8 ,so ,barabbas was6 ,but did ,barabbas go and hang himself1 ,weary of life--the murderer and thief8 ,this coarse and vulgar way will never do4 ,grant him a villain1 all his1 acts must be ,acts of a villain2 if you once admit ,remorse so bitter that it leads to death1 ,and death so instant on the heels of crime1 ,you grant a spirit sensitive to shame1 ,so sensitive that life can yield no joys ,to counterbalance one bad act2--but then ,a nature such as this1 though led astray1 ,when greatly tempted1 is no thorough wretch4 ,was the temptation great8 could such a bribe ,tempt such a nature to a crime like this8 ,i say1 to me it simply seems absurd4 ,peter at least was not so sensitive4 ,he cursed and swore1 denying that he knew ,who the man ,christus was2 but after all ,he only wept--he never hanged himself4 ,but take the other view that ,lysias takes1 ,all is at once consistent1 clear1 complete4 ,firm in the faith that ,christus was his ,god ,the great ,messiah sent to save the world1 ,he1 seeking for a sign--not for himself1 ,but to show proof to all that he was ,god ,conceived this plan1 rash if you will1 but grand4 ,thinking him man1 he said1 mere mortal man1 ,they seek to seize him--,i will make pretence ,to take the public bribe and point him out1 ,and they shall go1 all armed with swords and staves1 ,strong with the power of law1 to seize on him-- ,and at their touch he1 ,god himself1 shall stand ,revealed before them1 and their swords drop1 ,and prostrate all before him shall adore1 ,and cry1 ',behold the ,lord and ,king of all6' ,but when the soldiers laid their hands on him ,and bound him as they would a prisoner vile1 ,with taunts1 and mockery1 and threats of death-- ,he all the while submitting--then his dream ,burst into fragments with a crash3 aghast ,the whole world reeled before him2 the dread truth ,swooped like a sea upon him1 bearing down ,his thoughts in wild confusion4 ,he who dreamed ,to open the gates of glory to his ,lord1 ,opened in their stead the prison's jarring door1 ,and saw above him his dim dream of ,love ,change to a ,fury stained with blood and crime4 ,and then a madness seized him1 and remorse ,with pangs of torture drove him down to death4 ,conceive with me that sad and suffering heart ,if this be true that ,lysias says--,conceive6 ,alas6 ,orestes1 not so sad thy fate1 ,for the ,apollo pardoned1 purified-- ,thy ,furies were appeased1 thy peace returned1 ,but ,judas perished tortured unto death1 ,unpardoned1 unappeased1 unpurified4 ,and long as ,christus shall be known of men ,his name shall bear the brand of infamy1 ,the curse of generations still unborn4 ,thus much of him3 ,i leave the question here1 ,touching on naught beyond1 for ,lucius waits-- ,i hear him fuming in the court below1 ,cursing his servants and ,jerusalem1 ,and giving them to the infernal gods4 ,the sun is sinking--all the sky's afire-- ,and vale and mountain glow like molten ore ,in the intense full splendor of its rays4 ,a half-hour hence all will be dull and grey2 ,and ,lucius only waits until the shade ,sweeps down the plain then mounts and makes his way ,on through the blinding desert to the sea1 ,and thence his galley bears him on to ,rome4 ,salve et vale6--may good fortune wait ,on you and all your household6 ,greet for me ,titus and ,livia--in a word1 all friends4