,haines4 ,,the ,,seaboard ,,parish ,,by ,,george ,,mac ,,donald1 ,,ll4,d4 ,,vol4 ,,ii4 ,,contents ,,of ,,vol4 ,,ii4 ,i4 ,,another ,,sunday ,,evening ,,ii4 ,,niceboots ,,iii4 ,,the ,,blacksmith ,,iv4 ,,the ,,life-,,boat ,v4 ,,mr4 ,,percivale ,,vi4 ,,the ,,shadow ,,of ,,death ,,vii4 ,,at ,,the ,,farm ,,viii4 ,,the ,,keeve ,,ix4 ,,the ,,walk ,,to ,,church ,x4 ,,the ,,old ,,castle ,,xi4 ,,joe ,,and ,,his ,,trouble ,,xii4 ,a ,,small ,,adventure ,,xiii4 ,,the ,,harvest ,,chapter ,i4 ,,another ,,sunday ,,evening4 ,in the evening we met in ,connie's room1 as usual1 to have our talk4 ,and this is what came out of it4 ,the window was open4 ,the sun was in the west4 ,we sat a little aside out of the course of his radiance1 and let him look full into the room4 ,only ,wynnie sat back in a dark corner1 as if she would get out of his way4 ,below him the sea lay bluer than you could believe even when you saw it--blue with a delicate yet deep silky blue1 the exquisiteness of which was thrown up by the brilliant white lines of its lapping on the high coast1 to the northward4 ,we had just sat down1 when ,dora broke out with-- ,i saw ,niceboots at church4 ,he did stare at you1 papa1 as if he had never heard a sermon before4 ,i daresay he never heard such a sermon before6 said ,connie1 with the perfect confidence of inexperience and partiality--not to say ignorance1 seeing she had not heard the sermon herself4 ,here ,wynnie spoke from her dark corner1 apparently forcing herself to speak1 and thereby giving what seemed an unpleasant tone to what she said4 ,well1 papa1 ,i don't know what to think4 ,you are always telling us to trust in ,him2 but how can we1 if we are not good8 ,the first good thing you can do is to look up to him4 ,that is the beginning of trust in him1 and the most sensible thing that it is possible for us to do4 ,that is faith4 ,but it's no use sometimes4 ,how do you know that8 ,because you--,i mean ,i--can't feel good1 or care about it at all4 ,but is that any ground for saying that it is no use--that he does not heed you8 that he disregards the look cast up to him8 that1 till the heart goes with the will1 he who made himself strong to be the helper of the weak1 who pities most those who are most destitute--and who so destitute as those who do not love what they want to love--except1 indeed1 those who don't want to love8--that1 till you are well on towards all right by earnestly seeking it1 he won't help you8 ,you are to judge him from yourself1 are you8--forgetting that all the misery in you is just because you have not got his grand presence with you8 ,i spoke so earnestly as to be somewhat incoherent in words4 ,but my reader will understand4 ,wynnie was silent4 ,connie1 as if partly to help her sister1 followed on the same side4 ,i don't know exactly how to say what ,i mean1 papa1 but ,i wish ,i could get this lovely afternoon1 all full of sunshine and blue1 into unity with all that you teach us about ,jesus ,christ4 ,i wish this beautiful day came in with my thought of him1 like the frame--gold and red and blue--that you have to that picture of him at home4 ,why doesn't it8 ,just because you have not enough of faith in him1 my dear4 ,you do not know him well enough yet4 ,you do not yet believe that he means you all gladness1 heartily1 honestly1 thoroughly4 ,and no suffering1 papa8 ,i did not say that1 my dear4 ,there you are on your couch and can't move4 ,but he does mean you such gladness1 such a full sunny air and blue sea of blessedness that this suffering shall count for little in it2 nay more1 shall be taken in for part1 and1 like the rocks that interfere with the roll of the sea1 flash out the white that glorifies and intensifies the whole--to pass away by and by1 ,i trust1 none the less4 ,what a chance you have1 my ,connie1 of believing in him1 of offering upon his altar6 ,but1 said my wife1 are not these feelings in a great measure dependent upon the state of one's health8 ,i find it so different when the sunshine is inside me as well as outside me4 ,not a doubt of it1 my dear4 ,but that is only the more reason for rising above all that4 ,from the way some people speak of physical difficulties--,i don't mean you1 wife--you would think that they were not merely the inevitable which they are1 but the insurmountable which they are not4 ,that they are physical and not spiritual is not only a great consolation1 but a strong argument for overcoming them4 ,for all that is physical is put1 or is in the process of being put1 under the feet of the spiritual4 ,do not mistake me4 ,i do not say you can make yourself feel merry or happy when you are in a physical condition which is contrary to such mental condition4 ,but you can withdraw from it--not all at once2 but by practice and effort you can learn to withdraw from it1 refusing to allow your judgments and actions to be ruled by it4 ,you can climb up out of the fogs1 and sit quiet in the sunlight on the hillside of faith4 ,you cannot be merry down below in the fog1 for there is the fog2 but you can every now and then fly with the dove-wings of the soul up into the clear1 to remind yourself that all this passes away1 is but an accident1 and that the sun shines always1 although it may not at any given moment be shining on you4 ',what does that matter8' you will learn to say4 ',it is enough for me to know that the sun does shine1 and that this is only a weary fog that is round about me for the moment4 ,i shall come out into the light beyond presently4' ,this is faith--faith in ,god1 who is the light1 and is all in all4 ,i believe that the most glorious instances of calmness in suffering are thus achieved2 that the sufferers really do not suffer what one of us would if thrown into their physical condition without the refuge of their spiritual condition as well2 for they have taken refuge in the inner chamber4 ,out of the spring of their life a power goes forth that quenches the flames of the furnace of their suffering1 so far at least that it does not touch the deep life1 cannot make them miserable1 does not drive them from the possession of their soul in patience1 which is the divine citadel of the suffering4 ,do you understand me1 ,connie8 ,i do1 papa4 ,i think perfectly4 ,still less1 then1 is the fact that the difficulty is physical to be used as an excuse for giving way to ill-temper1 and1 in fact1 leaving ourselves to be tossed and shaken by every tremble of our nerves4 ,that is as if a man should give himself into the hands and will and caprice of an organ-grinder1 to work upon him1 not with the music of the spheres1 but with the wretched growling of the streets4 ,but1 said ,wynnie1 ,i have heard you yourself1 papa1 make excuse for people's ill-temper on this very ground1 that they were out of health4 ,indeed1 she went on1 half-crying1 ,i have heard you do so for myself1 when you did not know that ,i was within hearing4 ,yes1 my dear1 most assuredly4 ,it is no fiction1 but a real difference that lies between excusing ourselves and excusing other people4 ,no doubt the same excuse is just for ourselves that is just for other people4 ,but we can do something to put ourselves right upon a higher principle1 and therefore we should not waste our time in excusing1 or even in condemning ourselves1 but make haste up the hill4 ,where we cannot work--that is1 in the life of another--we have time to make all the excuse we can4 ,nay more2 it is only justice there4 ,we are not bound to insist on our own rights1 even of excuse2 the wisest thing often is to forego them4 ,but we are bound by heaven1 earth1 and hell to give them to other people4 ,and1 besides1 what a comfort to ourselves to be able to say1 ',it is true ,so-and-so was cross to-day4 ,but it wasn't in the least that he wasn't friendly1 or didn't like me2 it was only that he had eaten something that hadn't agreed with him4 ,i could see it in his eye4 ,he had one of his headaches4' ,thus1 you see1 justice to our neighbour1 and comfort to ourselves1 is one and the same thing4 ,but it would be a sad thing to have to think that when we found ourselves in the same ungracious condition1 from whatever cause1 we had only to submit to it1 saying1 ',it is a law of nature1' as even those who talk most about laws will not do1 when those laws come between them and their own comfort4 ,they are ready enough then to call in the aid of higher laws1 which1 so far from being contradictory1 overrule the lower to get things into something like habitable1 endurable condition4 ,it may be a law of nature2 but what has the ,law of the ,spirit of ,life to propound anent it8 as the ,scotch lawyers would say4 ,a little pause followed1 during which ,i hope some of us were thinking4 ,that ,wynnie1 at least1 was1 her next question made evident4 ,what you say about a law of nature and a law of the ,spirit makes me think again how that walking on the water has always been a puzzle to me4 ,it could hardly be other1 seeing that we cannot possibly understand it1 ,i answered4 ,but ,i find it so hard to believe4 ,can't you say something1 papa1 to help me to believe it8 ,i think if you admit what goes before1 you will find there is nothing against reason in the story4 ,tell me1 please1 what you mean4 ,if all things were made by ,jesus1 the ,word of ,god1 would it be reasonable that the water that he had created should be able to drown him8 ,it might drown his body4 ,it would if he had not the power over it still1 to prevent it from laying hold of him4 ,but just think for a moment4 ,god is a ,spirit4 ,spirit is greater than matter4 ,spirit makes matter4 ,think what it was for a human body to have such a divine creative power dwelling in it as that which dwelt in the human form of ,jesus6 ,what power1 and influence1 and utter rule that spirit must have over the body in which it dwells6 ,we cannot imagine how much2 but if we have so much power over our bodies1 how much more must the pure1 divine ,jesus1 have had over his6 ,i suspect this miracle was wrought1 not through anything done to the water1 but through the power of the spirit over the body of ,jesus1 which was all obedient thereto4 ,i am not explaining the miracle1 for that ,i cannot do4 ,one day ,i think it will be plain common sense to us4 ,but now ,i am only showing you what seems to me to bring us a step nearer to the essential region of the miracle1 and so far make it easier to believe4 ,if we look at the history of our ,lord1 we shall find that1 true real human body as his was1 it was yet used by his spirit after a fashion in which we cannot yet use our bodies4 ,and this is only reasonable4 ,let me give you an instance4 ,you remember how1 on the ,mount of ,transfiguration1 that body shone so that the light of it illuminated all his garments4 ,you do not surely suppose that this shine was external--physical light1 as we say1 merely8 ,no doubt it was physical light1 for how else would their eyes have seen it8 ,but where did it come from8 ,what was its source8 ,i think it was a natural outburst of glory from the mind of ,jesus1 filled with the perfect life of communion with his ,father--the light of his divine blessedness taking form in physical radiance that permeated and glorified all that surrounded him4 ,as the body is the expression of the soul1 as the face of ,jesus himself was the expression of the being1 the thought1 the love of ,jesus in like manner this radiance was the natural expression of his gladness1 even in the face of that of which they had been talking--,moses1 ,elias1 and he--namely1 the decease that he should accomplish at ,jerusalem4 ,again1 after his resurrection1 he convinced the hands1 as well as eyes1 of doubting ,thomas1 that he was indeed there in the body2 and yet that body could appear and disappear as the ,lord willed4 ,all this is full of marvel1 ,i grant you2 but probably far more intelligible to us in a further state of existence than some of the most simple facts with regard to our own bodies are to us now1 only that we are so used to them that we never think how unintelligible they really are4 ,but then about ,peter1 papa8 ,what you have been saying will not apply to ,peter's body1 you know4 ,i confess there is more difficulty there4 ,but if you can suppose that such power were indwelling in ,jesus1 you cannot limit the sphere of its action4 ,as he is the head of the body1 his church1 in all spiritual things1 so ,i firmly believe1 however little we can understand about it1 is he in all natural things as well4 ,peter's faith in him brought even ,peter's body within the sphere of the outgoing power of the ,master4 ,do you suppose that because ,peter ceased to be brave and trusting1 therefore ,jesus withdrew from him some sustaining power1 and allowed him to sink8 ,i do not believe it4 ,i believe ,peter's sinking followed naturally upon his loss of confidence4 ,thus he fell away from the life of the ,master2 was no longer1 in that way ,i mean1 connected with the ,head1 was instantly under the dominion of the natural law of gravitation1 as we call it1 and began to sink4 ,therefore the ,lord must take other means to save him4 ,he must draw nigh to him in a bodily manner4 ,the pride of ,peter had withdrawn him from the immediate spiritual influence of ,christ1 conquering his matter2 and therefore the ,lord must come over the stormy space between1 come nearer to him in the body1 and from his own height of safety above the sphere of the natural law1 stretch out to him the arm of physical aid1 lift him up1 lead him to the boat4 ,the whole salvation of the human race is figured in this story4 ,it is all ,christ1 my love4--,does this help you to believe at all8 ,i think it does1 papa4 ,but it wants thinking over a good deal4 ,i always find as ,i think1 that lighter bits shine out here and there in a thing ,i have no hope of understanding altogether4 ,that always helps me to believe that the rest might be understood too1 if ,i were only clever enough4 ,simple enough1 not clever enough1 my dear4 ,but there's one thing1 said my wife1 that is more interesting to me than what you have been talking about4 ,it is the other instances in the life of ,st4 ,peter in which you said he failed in a similar manner from pride or self-satisfaction4 ,one1 at least1 seems to me very clear4 ,you have often remarked to me1 ,ethel1 how little praise servants can stand2 how almost invariably after you have commended the diligence or skill of any of your household1 as you felt bound to do1 one of the first visible results was either a falling away in the performance by which she had gained the praise1 or a more or less violent access1 according to the nature of the individual1 of self-conceit1 soon breaking out in bad temper or impertinence4 ,now you will see precisely the same kind of thing in ,peter4 ,here ,i opened my ,new ,testament1 and read fragmentarily1 ',but whom say ye that ,i am8444 ,thou art the ,christ1 the ,son of the living ,god4444 ,blessed art thou1 ,simon4444 ,my ,father hath revealed that unto thee4 ,i will give unto thee the keys of the kingdom of heaven4444 ,i must suffer many things1 and be killed1 and be raised again the third day4444 ,be it far from thee1 ,lord4 ,this shall not be unto thee4444 ,get thee behind me1 ,satan4 ,thou art an offence unto me4' ,just contemplate the change here in the words of our ,lord4 ',blessed art thou4' ',thou art an offence unto me4' ,think what change has passed on ,peter's mood before the second of these words could be addressed to him to whom the first had just been spoken4 ,the ,lord had praised him4 ,peter grew self-sufficient1 even to the rebuking of him whose praise had so uplifted him4 ,but it is ever so4 ,a man will gain a great moral victory3 glad first1 then uplifted1 he will fall before a paltry temptation4 ,i have sometimes wondered1 too1 whether his denial of our ,lord had anything to do with his satisfaction with himself for making that onslaught upon the high priest's servant4 ,it was a brave thing and a faithful to draw a single sword against a multitude4 ,in his fiery eagerness and inexperience1 the blow1 well meant to cleave ,malchus's head1 missed1 and only cut off his ear2 but ,peter had herein justified his confident saying that he would not deny him4 ,he was not one to deny his ,lord who had been the first to confess him6 ,yet ere the cock had crowed1 ere the morning had dawned1 the vulgar grandeur of the palace of the high priest 7for let it be art itself1 it was vulgar grandeur beside that grandeur which it caused ,peter to deny71 and the accusing tone of a maid-servant1 were enough to make him quail whom the crowd with lanterns1 and torches1 and weapons1 had only roused to fight4 ,true1 he was excited then1 and now he was cold in the middle of the night1 with ,jesus gone from his sight a prisoner1 and for the faces of friends that had there surrounded him and strengthened him with their sympathy1 now only the faces of those who were1 or whom at least ,peter thought to be on the other side1 looking at him curiously1 as a strange intruder into their domains4 ,alas1 that the courage which led him to follow the ,lord should have thus led him1 not to deny him1 but into the denial of him6 ,yet why should ,i say alas8 ,if the denial of our ,lord lay in his heart a possible thing1 only prevented by his being kept in favourable circumstances for confessing him1 it was a thousand times better that he should deny him1 and thus know what a poor weak thing that heart of his was1 trust it no more1 and give it up to the ,master to make it strong1 and pure1 and grand4 ,for such an end the ,lord was willing to bear all the pain of ,peter's denial4 ,o1 the love of that ,son of ,man1 who in the midst of all the wretched weaknesses of those who surrounded him1 loved the best in them1 and looked forward to his own victory for them that they might become all that they were meant to be--like him2 that the lovely glimmerings of truth and love that were in them now--the breakings forth of the light that lighteneth every man--might grow into the perfect human day2 loving them even the more that they were so helpless1 so oppressed1 so far from that ideal which was their life1 and which all their dim desires were reaching after6 ,here ,i ceased1 and a little overcome with the great picture in my soul to which ,i had been able only to give the poorest expression1 rose1 and retired to my own room4 ,there ,i could only fall on my knees and pray that the ,lord ,christ1 who had died for me1 might have his own way with me--that it might be worth his while to have done what he did and what he was doing now for me4 ,to my ,elder ,brother1 my ,lord1 and my ,god1 ,i gave myself yet again1 confidently1 because he cared to have me1 and my very breath was his4 ,i would be what he wanted1 who knew all about it1 and had done everything that ,i might be a son of ,god--a living glory of gladness4 ,,chapter ,,ii4 ,,niceboots4 ,the next morning the captain of the lost vessel called upon me early to thank me for himself and his men4 ,he was a fine honest-looking burly fellow1 dressed in blue from head to heel4 ,he might have sat for a portrait of ,chaucer's shipman1 as far as his hue and the first look of him went4 ,it was clear that in many a tempest had his beard be shake1 and certainly the hote somer had made his hew all broun2 but farther the likeness would hardly go1 for the good fellow which ,chaucer applies with such irony to the shipman of his time1 who would filch wine1 and drown all the captives he made in a sea-fight1 was clearly applicable in good earnest to this shipman4 ,still1 ,i thought ,i had something to bring against him1 and therefore before we parted ,i said to him-- ,they tell me1 captain1 that your vessel was not seaworthy1 and that you could not but have known that4 ,she was my own craft1 sir1 and ,i judged her fit for several voyages more4 ,if she had been ,a #a she couldn't have been mine2 and a man must do what he can for his family4 ,but you were risking your life1 you know4 ,a few chances more or less don't much signify to a sailor1 sir4 ,there ain't nothing to be done without risk4 ,you'll find an old tub go voyage after voyage1 and she beyond bail1 and a clipper fresh off the stocks go down in the harbour4 ,it's all in the luck1 sir1 ,i assure you4 ,well1 if it were your own life ,i should have nothing to say1 seeing you have a family to look after2 but what about the poor fellows who made the voyage with you8 ,did they know what kind of a vessel they were embarking in8 ,wherever the captain's ready to go he'll always find men ready to follow him4 ,bless you1 sir1 they never asks no questions4 ,if a sailor was always to be thinking of the chances1 he'd never set his foot off shore4 ,still1 ,i don't think it's right they shouldn't know4 ,i daresay they knowed all about the old brig as well as ,i did myself4 ,you gets to know all about a craft just as you do about her captain4 ,she's got a character of her own1 and she can't hide it long1 any more than you can hide yours1 sir1 begging your pardon4 ,i daresay that's all correct1 but still ,i shouldn't like anyone to say to me1 ',you ought to have told me1 captain4' ,therefore1 you see1 ,i'm telling you1 captain1 and now ,i'm clear4--,have a glass of wine before you go1 ,i concluded1 ringing the bell4 ,thank you1 sir4 ,i'll turn over what you've been saying1 and anyhow ,i take it kind of you4 ,so we parted4 ,i have never seen him since1 and shall not1 most likely1 in this world4 ,but he looked like a man that could understand why and wherefore ,i spoke as ,i did4 ,and ,i had the advantage of having had a chance of doing something for him first of all4 ,let no man who wants to do anything for the soul of a man lose a chance of doing something for his body4 ,he ought to be willing1 and ready1 which is more than willing1 to do that whether or not2 but there are those who need this reminder4 ,of many a soul ,jesus laid hold by healing the suffering the body brought upon it4 ,no one but himself can tell how much the nucleus of the church was composed of and by those who had received health from his hands1 loving-kindness from the word of his mouth4 ,my own opinion is that herein lay the very germ of the kernel of what is now the ancient1 was then the infant church2 that from them1 next to the disciples themselves1 went forth the chief power of life in love1 for they too had seen the ,lord1 and in their own humble way could preach and teach concerning him4 ,what memories of him theirs must have been6 ,things went on very quietly1 that is1 as ,i mean now1 from the view-point of a historian1 without much to record bearing notably upon after events1 for the greater part of the next week4 ,i wandered about my parish1 making acquaintance with different people in an outside sort of way1 only now and then finding an opportunity of seeing into their souls except by conclusion4 ,but ,i enjoyed endlessly the aspects of the country4 ,it was not picturesque except in parts4 ,there was little wood and there were no hills1 only undulations1 though many of them were steep enough even from a pedestrian's point of view4 ,neither1 however1 were there any plains except high moorland tracts4 ,but the impression of the whole country was large1 airy1 sunshiny1 and it was clasped in the arms of the infinite1 awful1 yet how bountiful sea--if one will look at the ocean in its world-wide1 not to say its eternal aspects1 and not out of the fears of a hidebound love of life6 ,the sea and the sky1 ,i must confess1 dwarfed the earth1 made it of small account beside them2 but who could complain of such an influence8 ,at least1 not ,i4 ,my children bathed in this sea every day1 and gathered strength and knowledge from it4 ,it was1 as ,i have indicated1 a dangerous coast to bathe upon4 ,the sweep of the tides varied with the varying sands that were cast up4 ,there was now in one place1 now in another1 a strong undertow1 as they called it--a reflux1 that is1 of the inflowing waters1 which was quite sufficient to carry those who could not swim out into the great deep1 and rendered much exertion necessary1 even in those who could1 to regain the shore4 ,but there was a fine strong ,cornish woman to take charge of the ladies and the little boys1 and she1 watching the ways of the wild monster1 knew the when and the where1 and all about it4 ,connie got out upon the downs every day4 ,she improved in health certainly1 and we thought a little even in her powers of motion4 ,the weather continued superb4 ,what rain there was fell at night1 just enough for ,nature to wash her face with and so look quite fresh in the morning4 ,we contrived a dinner on the sands on the other side of the bay1 for the ,friday of this same week4 ,the morning rose gloriously4 ,harry and ,charlie were turning the house upside down1 to judge by their noise1 long before ,i was in the humour to get up1 for ,i had been reading late the night before4 ,i never made much objection to mere noise1 knowing that ,i could stop it the moment ,i pleased1 and knowing1 which was of more consequence1 that so far from there being anything wrong in making a noise1 the sea would make noise enough in our ears before we left ,kilkhaven4 ,the moment1 however1 that ,i heard a thread of whining or a burst of anger in the noise1 ,i would interfere at once--treating these just as things that must be dismissed at once4 ,harry and ,charlie were1 ,i say1 to use their own form of speech1 making such a row that morning1 however1 that ,i was afraid of some injury to the house or furniture1 which were not our own4 ,so ,i opened my door and called out-- ,harry6 ,charlie6 ,what on earth are you about8 ,nothing1 papa1 answered ,charlie4 ,only it's so jolly6 ,what is jolly1 my boy8 ,i asked4 ,o1 ,i don't know1 papa6 ,it's so jolly6 ,is it the sunshine8 thought ,i2 and the wind8 ,god's world all over8 ,the ,god of gladness in the hearts of the lads8 ,is it that8 ,no wonder1 then1 that they cannot tell yet what it is6 ,i withdrew into my room2 and so far from seeking to put an end to the noise--,i knew ,connie did not mind it--listened to it with a kind of reverence1 as the outcome of a gladness which the ,god of joy had kindled in their hearts4 ,soon after1 however1 ,i heard certain dim growls of expostulation from ,harry1 and having1 from experience1 ground for believing that the elder was tyrannising over the younger1 ,i stopped that and the noise together1 sending ,charlie to find out where the tide would be between one and two o'clock1 and ,harry to run to the top of the hill1 and find out the direction of the wind4 ,before ,i was dressed1 ,charlie was knocking at my door with the news that it would be half-tide about one2 and ,harry speedily followed with the discovery that the wind was north-east by south-west1 which of course determined that the sun would shine all day4 ,as the dinner-hour drew near1 the servants went over1 with ,walter at their head1 to choose a rock convenient for a table1 under the shelter of the rocks on the sands across the bay4 ,thither1 when ,walter returned1 we bore our ,connie1 carrying her litter close by the edge of the retreating tide1 which sometimes broke in a ripple of music under her1 wetting our feet with innocuous rush4 ,the child's delight was extreme1 as she thus skimmed the edge of the ocean1 with the little ones gambolling about her1 and her mamma and ,wynnie walking quietly on the landward side1 for she wished to have no one between her and the sea4 ,after scrambling with difficulty over some rocky ledges1 and stopping at ,connie's request1 to let her look into a deep pool in the sand1 which somehow or other retained the water after the rest had retreated1 we set her down near the mouth of a cave1 in the shadow of a rock4 ,and there was our dinner nicely laid for us on a flat rock in front of the cave4 ,the cliffs rose behind us1 with curiously curved and variously angled strata4 ,the sun in his full splendour threw dark shadows on the brilliant yellow sand1 more and more of which appeared as the bright blue water withdrew itself1 now rippling over it as if it meant to hide it all up again1 now uncovering more as it withdrew for another rush4 ,before we had finished our dinner1 the foremost wavelets appeared so far away over the plain of the sand1 that it seemed a long walk to the edge that had been almost at our feet a little while ago4 ,between us and it lay a lovely desert of glittering sand4 ,when even ,charlie and ,harry had arrived at the conclusion that it was time to stop eating1 we left the shadow and went out into the sun1 carrying ,connie and laying her down in the midst of the ribbed sea-sand1 which was very ribby to-day4 ,on a shawl a little way off from her lay her baby1 crowing and kicking with the same jollity that had possessed the boys ever since the morning4 ,i wandered about with ,wynnie on the sands1 picking up amongst other things strange creatures in thin shells ending in vegetable-like tufts1 if ,i remember rightly4 ,my wife sat on the end of ,connie's litter1 and ,dora and the boys1 a little way off1 were trying how far the full force of three wooden spades could1 in digging a hole1 keep ahead of the water which was ever tumbling in the sand from the sides of the same4 ,behind1 the servants were busy washing the plates in a pool1 and burying the fragments of the feast2 for ,i made it a rule wherever we went that the fair face of nature was not to be defiled4 ,i have always taken the part of excursionists in these latter days of running to and fro1 against those who complain that the loveliest places are being destroyed by their inroads4 ,but there is one most offensive1 even disgusting habit amongst them--that of leaving bones1 fragments of meat pies1 and worse than all1 pieces of greasy paper about the place1 which ,i cannot excuse1 or at least defend4 ,even the surface of ,cumberland and ,westmoreland lakes will be defiled with these floating abominations--not abominations at all if they are decently burned or buried when done with1 but certainly abominations when left to be cast hither and thither in the wind1 over the grass1 or on the eddy and ripple of the pure water1 for days after those who have thus left their shame behind them have returned to their shops or factories4 ,i forgive them for trampling down the grass and the ferns4 ,that cannot be helped1 and in comparison of the good they get1 is not to be considered at all4 ,but why should they leave such a savage trail behind them as this1 forgetting too that though they have done with the spot1 there are others coming after them to whom these remnants must be an offence8 ,at length in our roaming1 ,wynnie and ,i approached a long low ridge of rock1 rising towards the sea into which it ran4 ,crossing this1 we came suddenly upon the painter whom ,dora had called ,niceboots1 sitting with a small easel before him4 ,we were right above him ere we knew4 ,he had his back towards us1 so that we saw at once what he was painting4 ,o1 papa6 cried ,wynnie involuntarily1 and the painter looked round4 ,i beg your pardon1 ,i said4 ,we came over from the other side1 and did not see you before4 ,i hope we have not disturbed you much4 ,not in the least1 he answered courteously1 and rose as he spoke4 ,i saw that the subject on his easel suggested that of which ,wynnie had been making a sketch at the same time1 on the day when ,connie first lay on the top of the opposite cliff4 ,but he was not even looking in the same direction now4 ,do you mind having your work seen before it is finished8 ,not in the least1 if the spectators will do me the favour to remember that most processes have to go through a seemingly chaotic stage1 he answered4 ,i was struck with the mode and tone of the remark4 ,here is no common man1 ,i said to myself1 and responded to him in something of a similar style4 ,i wish we could always keep that in mind with regard to human beings themselves1 as well as their works1 ,i said aloud4 ,the painter looked at me1 and ,i looked at him4 ,we speak each from the experience of his own profession1 ,i presume1 he said4 ,but1 ,i returned1 glancing at the little picture in oils upon his easel1 your work here1 though my knowledge of painting is next to nothing--perhaps ,i ought to say nothing at all--this picture must have long ago passed the chaotic stage4 ,it is nearly as much finished as ,i care to make it1 he returned4 ,i hardly count this work at all4 ,i am chiefly amusing1 or rather pleasing1 my own fancy at present4 ,apparently1 ,i remarked1 you had the conical rock outside the hay for your model1 and now you are finishing it with your back turned towards it4 ,how is that8 ,i will soon explain1 he answered4 ,the moment ,i saw this rock1 it reminded me of ,dante's ,purgatory4 ,ah1 you are a reader of ,dante8 ,i said4 ,in the original1 ,i hope4 ,yes4 ,a friend of mine1 a brother painter1 an ,italian1 set me going with that1 and once going with ,dante1 nobody could well stop4 ,i never knew what intensity per se was till ,i began to read ,dante4 ,that is quite my own feeling4 ,now1 to return to your picture4 ,without departing at all from natural forms1 ,i thought to make it suggest the ,purgatorio to anyone who remembered the description given of the place ab extra by ,ulysses1 in the end of the twenty-sixth canto of the ,inferno4 ,of course1 that thing there is a mere rock1 yet it has certain mountain forms about it4 ,i have put it at a much greater distance1 you see1 and have sought to make it look a solitary mountain in the midst of a great water4 ,you will discover even now that the circles of the ,purgatory are suggested without any approach1 ,i think1 to artificial structure2 and there are occasional hints at figures1 which you cannot definitely detach from the rocks--which1 by the way1 you must remember1 were in one part full of sculptures4 ,i have kept the mountain near enough1 however1 to indicate the great expanse of wild flowers on the top1 which ,matilda was so busy gathering4 ,i want to indicate too the wind up there in the terrestrial paradise1 ever and always blowing one way4 ,you remember1 ,mr4 ,walton8--for the young man1 getting animated1 began to talk as if we had known each other for some time--and here he repeated the purport of ,dante's words in ,english3 ,an air of sweetness1 changeless in its flow1 ,with no more strength than in a soft wind lies1 ,smote peacefully against me on the brow4 ,by which the leaves all trembling1 level-wise1 ,did every one bend thitherward to where ,the high mount throws its shadow at sunrise4 ,i thought you said you did not use translations8 ,i thought it possible that--,miss ,walton 787 interrogatively this--might not follow the ,italian so easily1 and ,i feared to seem pedantic4 ,she won't lag far behind1 ,i flatter myself1 ,i returned4 ,whose translation do you quote8 ,he hesitated a moment2 then said carelessly3 ,i have cobbled a few passages after that fashion myself4 ,it has the merit of being near the original at least1 ,i returned2 and that seems to me one of the chief merits a translation can possess4 ,then1 the painter resumed1 rather hastily1 as if to avoid any further remark upon his verses1 you see those white things in the air above8 ,here he turned to ,wynnie4 ,miss ,walton will remember--,i think she was making a drawing of the rock at the same time ,i was--how the seagulls1 or some such birds--only two or three of them--kept flitting about the top of it8 ,i remember quite well1 answered ,wynnie1 with a look of appeal to me4 ,yes1 ,i interposed2 my daughter1 in describing what she had been attempting to draw1 spoke especially of the birds over the rock4 ,for she said the white lapping of the waves looked like spirits trying to get loose1 and the white birds like foam that had broken its chains1 and risen in triumph into the air4 ,here ,mr4 ,niceboots1 for as yet ,i did not know what else to call him1 looked at ,wynnie almost with a start4 ,how wonderfully that falls in with my fancy about the rock6 he said4 ,purgatory indeed6 with imprisoned souls lapping at its foot1 and the free souls winging their way aloft in ether4 ,well1 this world is a kind of purgatory anyhow--is it not1 ,mr4 ,walton8 ,certainly it is4 ,we are here tried as by fire1 to see what our work is--whether wood1 hay1 and stubble1 or gold and silver and precious stones4 ,you see1 resumed the painter1 if anybody only glanced at my little picture1 he would take those for sea-birds2 but if he looked into it1 and began to suspect me1 he would find out that they were ,dante and ,beatrice on their way to the sphere of the moon4 ,in one respect at least1 then1 your picture has the merit of corresponding to fact2 for what thing is there in the world1 or what group of things1 in which the natural man will not see merely the things of nature1 but the spiritual man the things of the spirit8 ,i am no theologian1 said the painter1 turning away1 ,i thought somewhat coldly4 ,but ,i could see that ,wynnie was greatly interested in him4 ,perhaps she thought that here was some enlightenment of the riddle of the world for her1 if she could but get at what he was thinking4 ,she was used to my way of it3 here might be something new4 ,if ,i can be of any service to ,miss ,walton with her drawing1 ,i shall be happy1 he said1 turning again towards me4 ,but his last gesture had made me a little distrustful of him1 and ,i received his advances on this point with a coldness which ,i did not wish to make more marked than his own towards my last observation4 ,you are very kind1 ,i said2 but ,miss ,walton does not presume to be an artist4 ,i saw a slight shade pass over ,wynnie's countenance4 ,when ,i turned to ,mr4 ,niceboots1 a shade of a different sort was on his4 ,surely ,i had said something wrong to cast a gloom on two young faces4 ,i made haste to make amends4 ,we are just going to have some coffee1 ,i said1 for my servants1 ,i see1 have managed to kindle a fire4 ,will you come and allow me to introduce you to ,mrs4 ,walton8 ,with much pleasure1 he answered1 rising from the rock whereon1 as he spoke about his picture1 he had again seated himself4 ,he was a fine-built1 black-bearded1 sunburnt fellow1 with clear gray eyes notwithstanding1 a rather ,roman nose1 and good features generally4 ,but there was an air of suppression1 if not of sadness1 about him1 however1 did not in the least interfere with the manliness of his countenance1 or of its expression4 ,but1 ,i said1 how am ,i to effect an introduction1 seeing ,i do not yet know your name4 ,i had had to keep a sharp look-out on myself lest ,i should call him ,mr4 ,niceboots4 ,he smiled very graciously and replied1 ,my name is ,percivale--,charles ,percivale4 ,a descendant of ,sir ,percivale of ,king ,arthur's ,round ,table8 ,i cannot count quite so far back1 he answered1 as that--not quite to the ,conquest1 he added1 with a slight deepening of his sunburnt hue4 ,i do come of a fighting race1 but ,i cannot claim ,sir ,percivale4 ,we were now walking along the edge of the still retreating waves towards the group upon the sands1 ,mr4 ,percivale and ,i foremost1 and ,wynnie lingering behind4 ,o1 do look here papa6 she cried1 from some little distance4 ,we turned and saw her gazing at something on the sand at her feet4 ,hastening back1 we found it to be a little narrow line of foam-bubbles1 which the water had left behind it on the sand1 slowly breaking and passing out of sight4 ,why there should be foam-bubbles there then1 and not always1 ,i do not know4 ,but there they were--and such colours6 deep rose and grassy green and ultramarine blue2 and1 above all1 one dark1 yet brilliant and intensely-burnished1 metallic gold4 ,all of them were of a solid-looking burnished colour1 like opaque body-colour laid on behind translucent crystal4 ,those little ocean bubbles were well worth turning to see2 and so ,i said to ,wynnie4 ,but1 as we gazed1 they went on vanishing1 one by one4 ,every moment a heavenly glory of hue burst1 and was nowhere4 ,we walked away again towards the rest of our party4 ,don't you think those bubbles more beautiful than any precious stones you ever saw1 papa8 ,yes1 my love1 ,i think they are1 except it be the opal4 ,in the opal1 ,god seems to have fixed the evanescent and made the vanishing eternal4 ,and flowers are more beautiful things than jewels8' she said interrogatively4 ,many--perhaps most flowers are1 ,i granted4 ,and did you ever see such curves and delicate textures anywhere else as in the clouds1 papa8 ,i think not--in the cirrhous clouds at least--the frozen ones4 ,but what are you putting me to my catechism for in this way1 my child8 ,o1 papa1 ,i could go on a long time with that catechism2 but ,i will end with one question more1 which you will perhaps find a little harder to answer4 ,only ,i daresay you have had an answer ready for years lest one of us should ask you some day4 ,no1 my love4 ,i never got an answer ready for anything lest one of my children should ask me4 ,but it is not surprising either that children should be puzzled about the things that have puzzled their father1 or that by the time they are able to put the questions1 he should have found out some sort of an answer to most of them4 ,go on with your catechism1 ,wynnie4 ,now for your puzzle6 ,it's not a funny question1 papa2 it's a very serious one4 ,i can't think why the unchanging ,god should have made all the most beautiful things wither and grow ugly1 or burst and vanish1 or die somehow and be no more4 ,mamma is not so beautiful as she once was1 is she8 ,in one way1 no2 but in another and better way1 much more so4 ,but we will not talk about her kind of beauty just now2 we will keep to the more material loveliness of which you have been speaking--though1 in truth1 no loveliness can be only material4 ,well1 then1 for my answer2 it is1 ,i think1 because ,god loves the beauty so much that he makes all beautiful things vanish quickly4 ,i do not understand you1 papa4 ,i daresay not1 my dear4 ,but ,i will explain to you a little1 if ,mr4 ,percivale will excuse me4 ,on the contrary1 ,i am greatly interested1 both in the question and the answer4 ,well1 then1 ,wynnie2 everything has a soul and a body1 or something like them4 ,by the body we know the soul4 ,but we are always ready to love the body instead of the soul4 ,therefore1 ,god makes the body die continually1 that we may learn to love the soul indeed4 ,the world is full of beautiful things1 but ,god has saved many men from loving the mere bodies of them1 by making them poor2 and more still by reminding them that if they be as rich as ,croesus all their lives1 they will be as poor as ,diogenes--poorer1 without even a tub--when this world1 with all its pictures1 scenery1 books1 and--alas for some ,christians6--bibles even1 shall have vanished away4 ,why do you say alas1 papa--if they are ,christians especially8 ,i say alas only from their point of view1 not from mine4 ,i mean such as are always talking and arguing from the ,bible1 and never giving themselves any trouble to do what it tells them4 ,they insist on the anise and cummin1 and forget the judgment1 mercy1 and faith4 ,these worship the body of the truth1 and forget the soul of it4 ,if the flowers were not perishable1 we should cease to contemplate their beauty1 either blinded by the passion for hoarding the bodies of them1 or dulled by the hebetude of commonplaceness that the constant presence of them would occasion4 ,to compare great things with small1 the flowers wither1 the bubbles break1 the clouds and sunsets pass1 for the very same holy reason1 in the degree of its application to them1 for which the ,lord withdrew from his disciples and ascended again to his ,father--that the ,comforter1 the ,spirit of ,truth1 the ,soul of things1 might come to them and abide with them1 and so the ,son return1 and the ,father be revealed4 ,the flower is not its loveliness1 and its loveliness we must love1 else we shall only treat them as flower-greedy children1 who gather and gather1 and fill hands and baskets1 from a mere desire of acquisition1 excusable enough in them1 but the same in kind1 however harmless in mode1 and degree1 and object1 as the avarice of the miser4 ,therefore ,god1 that we may always have them1 and ever learn to love their beauty1 and yet more their truth1 sends the beneficent winter that we may think about what we have lost1 and welcome them when they come again with greater tenderness and love1 with clearer eyes to see1 and purer hearts to understand1 the spirit that dwells in them4 ,we cannot do without the 'winter of our discontent4' ,shakspere surely saw that when he makes ,titania say1 in ,a ,midsummer ,night's ,dream3 ',the human mortals want their winter here'-- namely1 to set things right2 and none of those editors who would alter the line seem to have been capable of understanding its import4 ,i think ,i understand you a little1 answered ,wynnie4 ,then1 changing her tone1 ,i told you1 papa1 you would have an answer ready2 didn't ,i8 ,yes1 my child2 but with this difference--,i found the answer to meet my own necessities1 not yours4 ,and so you had it ready for me when ,i wanted it4 ,just so4 ,that is the only certainty you have in regard to what you give away4 ,no one who has not tasted it and found it good has a right to offer any spiritual dish to his neighbour4 ,mr4 ,percivale took no part in our conversation4 ,the moment ,i had presented him to ,mrs4 ,walton and ,connie1 and he had paid his respects by a somewhat stately old-world obeisance1 he merged the salutation into a farewell1 and1 either forgetting my offer of coffee1 or having changed his mind1 withdrew1 a little to my disappointment1 for1 notwithstanding his lack of response where some things he said would have led me to expect it1 ,i had begun to feel much interested in him4 ,he was scarcely beyond hearing1 when ,dora came up to me from her digging1 with an eager look on her sunny face4 ,hasn't he got nice boots1 papa8 ,indeed1 my dear1 ,i am unable to support you in that assertion1 for ,i never saw his boots4 ,i did1 then1 returned the child2 and ,i never saw such nice boots4 ,i accept the statement willingly1 ,i replied2 and we heard no more of the boots1 for his name was now substituted for his nickname4 ,nor did ,i see himself again for some days--not in fact till next ,sunday--though why he should come to church at all was something of a puzzle to me1 especially when ,i knew him better4 ,,chapter ,,iii4 ,,the ,,blacksmith4 ,the next day ,i set out after breakfast to inquire about a blacksmith4 ,it was not every or any blacksmith that would do4 ,i must not fix on the first to do my work because he was the first4 ,there was one in the village1 ,i soon learned2 but ,i found him an ordinary man1 who1 ,i have no doubt1 could shoe a horse and avoid the quick1 but from whom any greater delicacy of touch was not to be expected4 ,inquiring further1 ,i heard of a young smith who had lately settled in a hamlet a couple of miles distant1 but still within the parish4 ,in the afternoon ,i set out to find him4 ,to my surprise1 he was a pale-faced1 thoughtful-looking man1 with a huge frame1 which appeared worn rather than naturally thin1 and large eyes that looked at the anvil as if it was the horizon of the world4 ,he had got a horse-shoe in his tongs when ,i entered4 ,notwithstanding the fire that glowed on the hearth1 and the sparks that flew like a nimbus in eruption from about his person1 the place looked very dark to me entering from the glorious blaze of the almost noontide sun1 and felt cool after the deep lane through which ,i had come1 and which had seemed a very reservoir of sunbeams4 ,i could see the smith by the glow of his horse-shoe2 but all between me and the shoe was dark4 ,good-morning1 ,i said4 ,it is a good thing to find a man by his work4 ,i heard you half a mile off or so1 and now ,i see you1 but only by the glow of your work4 ,it is a grand thing to work in fire4 ,he lifted his hammered hand to his forehead courteously1 and as lightly as if the hammer had been the butt-end of a whip4 ,i don't know if you would say the same if you had to work at it in weather like this1 he answered4 ,if ,i did not1 ,i returned1 that would be the fault of my weakness1 and would not affect the assertion ,i have just made1 that it is a fine thing to work in fire4 ,well1 you may be right1 he rejoined with a sigh1 as1 throwing the horse-shoe he had been fashioning from the tongs on the ground1 he next let the hammer drop beside the anvil1 and leaning against it held his head for a moment between his hands1 and regarded the floor4 ,it does not much matter to me1 he went on1 if ,i only get through my work and have done with it4 ,no man shall say ,i shirked what ,i'd got to do4 ,and then when it's over there won't be a word to say agen me1 or-- ,he did not finish the sentence4 ,and now ,i could see the sunlight lying in a somewhat dreary patch1 if the word dreary can be truly used with respect to any manifestation of sunlight1 on the dark clay floor4 ,i hope you are not ill1 ,i said4 ,he made no answer1 but taking up his tongs caught with it from a beam one of a number of roughly-finished horse-shoes which hung there1 and put it on the fire to be fashioned to a certain fit4 ,while he turned it in the fire1 and blew the bellows1 ,i stood regarding him4 ,this man will do for my work1 ,i said to myself2 though ,i should not wonder from the look of him if it was the last piece of work he ever did under the ,new ,jerusalem4 ,the smith's words broke in on my meditations4 ,when ,i was a little boy1 he said1 ,i once wanted to stay at home from school4 ,i had1 ,i believe1 a little headache1 but nothing worth minding4 ,i told my mother that ,i had a headache1 and she kept me1 and ,i helped her at her spinning1 which was what ,i liked best of anything4 ,but in the afternoon the ,methodist preacher came in to see my mother1 and he asked me what was the matter with me1 and my mother answered for me that ,i had a bad head1 and he looked at me2 and as my head was quite well by this time1 ,i could not help feeling guilty4 ,and he saw my look1 ,i suppose1 sir1 for ,i can't account for what he said any other way2 and he turned to me1 and he said to me1 solemn-like1 ',is your head bad enough to send you to the ,lord ,jesus to make you whole8' ,i could not speak a word1 partly from bashfulness1 ,i suppose1 for ,i was but ten years old4 ,so he followed it up1 as they say3 ',then you ought to be at school1' says he4 ,i said nothing1 because ,i couldn't4 ,but never since then have ,i given in as long as ,i could stand4 ,and ,i can stand now1 and lift my hammer1 too1 he said1 as he took the horse-shoe from the forge1 laid it on the anvil1 and again made a nimbus of coruscating iron4 ,you are just the man ,i want1 ,i said4 ,i've got a job for you1 down to ,kilkhaven1 as you say in these parts4 ,what is it1 sir8 ,something about the church8 ,i should ha' thought the church was all spick and span by this time4 ,i see you know who ,i am1 ,i said4 ,of course ,i do1 he answered4 ,i don't go to church myself1 being brought up a ,methodist2 but anything that happens in the parish is known the next day all over it4 ,you won't mind doing my job though you are a ,methodist1 will you8 ,i asked4 ,not ,i1 sir4 ,if ,i've read right1 it's the fault of the ,church that we don't pull all alongside4 ,you turned us out1 sir2 we didn't go out of ourselves4 ,at least1 if all they say is true1 which ,i can't be sure of1 you know1 in this world4 ,you are quite right there though1 ,i answered4 ,and in doing so1 the ,church had the worst of it--as all that judge and punish their neighbours have4 ,but you have been the worse for it1 too3 all of which is to be laid to the charge of the ,church4 ,for there is not one clergyman ,i know--mind1 ,i say1 that ,i know--who would have made such a cruel speech to a boy as that the ,methodist parson made to you4 ,but it did me good1 sir8 ,are you sure of that8 ,i am not4 ,are you sure1 first of all1 it did not make you proud8 ,are you sure it has not made you work beyond your strength--,i don't mean your strength of arm1 for clearly that is all that could be wished1 but of your chest1 your lungs8 ,is there not some danger of your leaving someone who is dependent on you too soon unprovided for8 ,is there not some danger of your having worked as if ,god were a hard master8--of your having worked fiercely1 indignantly1 as if he wronged you by not caring for you1 not understanding you8 ,he returned me no answer1 but hammered momently on his anvil4 ,whether he felt what ,i meant1 or was offended at my remark1 ,i could not then tell4 ,i thought it best to conclude the interview with business4 ,i have a delicate little job that wants nice handling1 and ,i fancy you are just the man to do it to my mind1 ,i said4 ,what is it1 sir8 he asked1 in a friendly manner enough4 ,if you will excuse me1 ,i would rather show it to you than talk about it1 ,i returned4 ,as you please1 sir4 ,when do you want me8 ,the first hour you can come4 ,to-morrow morning8 ,if you feel inclined4 ,for that matter1 ,i'd rather go to bed4 ,come to me instead3 it's light work4 ,i will1 sir--at ten o'clock4 ,if you please4 ,and so it was arranged4 ,,chapter ,,iv4 ,,the ,,life-,,boat4 ,the next day rose glorious4 ,indeed1 early as the sun rose1 ,i saw him rise--saw him1 from the down above the house1 over the land to the east and north1 ascend triumphant into his own light1 which had prepared the way for him2 while the clouds that hung over the sea glowed out with a faint flush1 as anticipating the hour when the west should clasp the declining glory in a richer though less dazzling splendour1 and shine out the bride of the bridegroom east1 which behold each other from afar across the intervening world1 and never mingle but in the sight of the eyes4 ,the clear pure light of the morning made me long for the truth in my heart1 which alone could make me pure and clear as the morning1 tune me up to the concert-pitch of the nature around me4 ,and the wind that blew from the sunrise made me hope in the ,god who had first breathed into my nostrils the breath of life1 that he would at length so fill me with his breath1 his wind1 his spirit1 that ,i should think only his thoughts and live his life1 finding therein my own life1 only glorified infinitely4 ,after breakfast and prayers1 ,i would go to the church to await the arrival of my new acquaintance the smith4 ,in order to obtain entrance1 ,i had1 however1 to go to the cottage of the sexton4 ,this was not my first visit there1 so that ,i may now venture to take my reader with me4 ,to reach the door1 ,i had to cross a hollow by a bridge1 built1 for the sake of the road1 over what had once been the course of a rivulet from the heights above4 ,now it was a kind of little glen1 or what would in ,scotland be called a den1 ,i think1 grown with grass and wild flowers and ferns1 some of them1 rare and fine4 ,the roof of the cottage came down to the road1 and1 until you came quite near1 you could not but wonder where the body that supported this head could be4 ,but you soon saw that the ground fell suddenly away1 leaving a bank against which the cottage was built4 ,crossing a garden of the smallest1 the principal flowers of which were the stonecrop on its walls1 by a flag-paved path1 you entered the building1 and1 to your surprise1 found yourself1 not in a little cottage kitchen1 as you expected1 but in a waste-looking space1 that seemed to have forgotten the use for which it had been built4 ,there was a sort of loft along one side of it1 and it was heaped with indescribable lumber-looking stuff with here and there a hint at possible machinery4 ,the place had been a mill for grinding corn1 and its wheel had been driven by the stream which had run for ages in the hollow of which ,i have already spoken4 ,but when the canal came to be constructed1 the stream had to be turned aside from its former course1 and indeed was now employed upon occasion to feed the canal2 so that the mill of necessity had fallen into disuse and decay4 ,crossing this floor1 you entered another door1 and turning sharp to the left1 went down a few steps of a ladder-sort of stair1 and after knocking your hat against a beam1 emerged in the comfortable quaint little cottage kitchen you had expected earlier4 ,a cheerful though small fire burns in the grate--for even here the hearth-fire has vanished from the records of cottage-life--and is pleasant here even in the height of summer1 though it is counted needful only for cooking purposes4 ,the ceiling1 which consists only of the joists and the boards that floor the bedroom above1 is so low1 that necessity1 if not politeness1 would compel you to take off your already-bruised hat4 ,some of these joists1 you will find1 are made further useful by supporting each a shelf1 before which hangs a little curtain of printed cotton1 concealing the few stores and postponed eatables of the house--forming1 in fact1 both store-room and larder of the family4 ,on the walls hang several coloured prints1 and within a deep glazed frame the figure of a ship in full dress1 carved in rather high relief in sycamore4 ,as ,i now entered1 ,mrs4 ,coombes rose from a high-backed settle near the fire1 and bade me good-morning with a courtesy4 ,what a lovely day it is1 ,mrs4 ,coombes6 ,it is so bright over the sea1 ,i said1 going to the one little window which looked out on the great ,atlantic1 that one almost expects a great merchant navy to come sailing into ,kilkhaven--sunk to the water's edge with silks1 and ivory1 and spices1 and apes1 and peacocks1 like the ships of ,solomon that we read about--just as the sun gets up to the noonstead4 ,before ,i record her answer1 ,i turn to my reader1 who in the spirit accompanies me1 and have a little talk with him4 ,i always make it a rule to speak freely with the less as with the more educated of my friends4 ,i never talk down to them1 except ,i be expressly explaining something to them4 ,the law of the world is as the law of the family4 ,those children grow much the faster who hear all that is going on in the house4 ,reaching ever above themselves1 they arrive at an understanding at fifteen1 which1 in the usual way of things1 they would not reach before five-and-twenty or thirty2 and this in a natural way1 and without any necessary priggishness1 except such as may belong to their parents4 ,therefore ,i always spoke to the poor and uneducated as to my own people1--freely1 not much caring whether ,i should be quite understood or not2 for ,i believed in influences not to be measured by the measure of the understanding4 ,but what was the old woman's answer8 ,it was this3 ,i know1 sir4 ,and when ,i was as young as you--,i was not so very young1 my reader may well think--,i thought like that about the sea myself4 ,everything come from the sea4 ,for my boy ,willie he du bring me home the beautifullest parrot and the talkingest you ever see1 and the red shawl all worked over with flowers3 ,i'll show it to you some day1 sir1 when you have time4 ,he made that ship you see in the frame there1 sir1 all with his own knife1 out on a bit o' wood that he got at the ,marishes1 as they calls it1 sir--a bit of an island somewheres in the great sea4 ,but the parrot's gone dead like the rest of them1 sir4--,where am ,i8 and what am ,i talking about8 she added1 looking down at her knitting as if she had dropped a stitch1 or rather as if she had forgotten what she was making1 and therefore what was to come next4 ,you were telling me how you used to think of the sea-- ,when ,i was as young as you4 ,i remember1 sir4 ,well1 that lasted a long time--lasted till my third boy fell asleep in the wide water2 for it du call it falling asleep1 don't it1 sir8 ,the ,bible certainly does1 ,i answered4 ,it's the ,bible ,i be meaning1 of course1 she returned4 ,well1 after that1 but ,i don't know what began it1 only ,i did begin to think about the sea as something that took away things and didn't bring them no more4 ,and somehow or other she never look so blue after that1 and she give me the shivers4 ,but now1 sir1 she always looks to me like one o' the shining ones that come to fetch the pilgrims4 ,you've heard tell of the ,pilgrim's ,progress1 ,i daresay1 sir1 among the poor people2 for they du say it was written by a tinker1 though there be a power o' good things in it that ,i think the gentlefolk would like if they knowed it4 ,i do know the book--nearly as well as ,i know the ,bible1 ,i answered2 and the shining ones are very beautiful in it4 ,i am glad you can think of the sea that way4 ,it's looking in at the window all day as ,i go about the house1 she answered1 and all night too when ,i'm asleep2 and if ,i hadn't learned to think of it that way1 it would have driven me mad1 ,i du believe4 ,i was forced to think that way about it1 or not think at all4 ,and that wouldn't be easy1 with the sound of it in your ears the last thing at night and the first thing in the morning4 ,the truth of things is indeed the only refuge from the look of things1 ,i replied4 ,but now ,i want the key of the church1 if you will trust me with it1 for ,i have something to do there this morning2 and the key of the tower as well1 if you please4 ,with her old smile1 ripened only by age1 she reached the ponderous keys from the nail where they hung1 and gave them into my hand4 ,i left her in the shadow of her dwelling1 and stepped forth into the sunlight4 ,the first thing ,i observed was the blacksmith waiting for me at the church door4 ,now that ,i saw him in the full light of day1 and now that he wore his morning face upon which the blackness of labour had not yet gathered1 ,i could see more plainly how far he was from well4 ,there was a flush on his thin cheek by which the less used exercise of walking revealed his inward weakness1 and the light in his eyes had something of the far-country in them--the light that never was on sea or shore4 ,but his speech was cheerful1 for he had been walking in the light of this world1 and that had done something to make the light within him shine a little more freely4 ,how do you find yourself to-day8 ,i asked4 ,quite well1 sir1 ,i thank you1 he answered4 ,a day like this does a man good4 ,but1 he added1 and his countenance fell1 the heart knoweth its own bitterness4 ,it may know it too much1 ,i returned1 just because it refuses to let a stranger intermeddle therewith4 ,he made no reply4 ,i turned the key in the great lock1 and the iron-studded oak opened and let us into the solemn gloom4 ,it did not require many minutes to make the man understand what ,i wanted of him4 ,we must begin at the bells and work down1 he said4 ,so we went up into the tower1 where1 with the help of a candle ,i fetched for him from the cottage1 he made a good many minute measurements2 found that carpenter's work was necessary for the adjustment of the hammers and cranks and the leading of the rods1 undertook the management of the whole1 and in the course of an hour and a half went home to do what had to be done before any fixing could be commenced1 assuring me that he had no doubt of bringing the job to a satisfactory conclusion1 although the force of the blow on the bell would doubtless have to be regulated afterwards by repeated trials4 ,in a fortnight1 ,i hope you will be able to play a tune to the parish1 sir1 he added1 as he took his leave4 ,i resolved1 if possible1 to know more of the man1 and find out his trouble1 if haply ,i might be able to give him any comfort1 for ,i was all but certain that there was a deeper cause for his gloom than the state of his health4 ,when he was gone ,i stood with the key of the church in my hand1 and looked about me4 ,nature at least was in glorious health--sunshine in her eyes1 light fantastic cloud-images passing through her brain1 her breath coming and going in soft breezes perfumed with the scents of meadows and wild flowers1 and her green robe shining in the motions of her gladness4 ,i turned to lock the church door1 though in my heart ,i greatly disapproved of locking the doors of churches1 and only did so now because it was not my church1 and ,i had no business to force my opinions upon other customs4 ,but when ,i turned ,i received a kind of questioning shock4 ,there was the fallen world1 as men call it1 shining in glory and gladness1 because ,god was there2 here was the way into the lost ,paradise1 yea1 the door into an infinitely higher ,eden than that ever had or ever could have been1 iron-clamped and riveted1 gloomy and low-browed like the entrance to a sepulchre1 and surrounded with the grim heads of grotesque monsters of the deep4 ,what did it mean8 ,here was contrast enough to require harmonising1 or if that might not be1 then accounting for4 ,perhaps it was enough to say that although ,god made both the kingdom of nature and the kingdom of grace1 yet the symbol of the latter was the work of man1 and might not altogether correspond to ,god's idea of the matter4 ,i turned away thoughtful1 and went through the churchyard with my eye on the graves4 ,as ,i left the churchyard1 still looking to the earth1 the sound of voices reached my ear4 ,i looked up4 ,there1 down below me1 at the foot of the high bank on which ,i stood1 lay a gorgeous shining thing upon the bosom of the canal1 full of men1 and surrounded by men1 women1 and children1 delighting in its beauty4 ,i had never seen such a thing before1 but ,i knew at once1 as by instinct1 which of course it could not have been1 that it was the life-boat4 ,but in its gorgeous colours1 red and white and green1 it looked more like the galley that bore ,cleopatra to ,actium4 ,nor1 floating so light on the top of the water1 and broad in the beam withal1 curved upward and ornamented at stern and stem1 did it look at all like a creature formed to battle with the fierce elements4 ,a pleasure-boat for floating between river banks it seemed1 drawn by swans mayhap1 and regarded in its course by fair eyes from green terrace-walks1 or oriel windows of ancient houses on verdant lawns4 ,ten men sat on the thwarts1 and one in the stern by the yet useless rudder1 while men and boys drew the showy thing by a rope downward to the lock-gates4 ,the men in the boat1 wore blue jerseys1 but you could see little of the colour for strange unshapely things that they wore above them1 like an armour cut out of a row of organ pipes4 ,they were their cork-jackets2 for every man had to be made into a life-boat himself4 ,i descended the bank1 and stood on the edge of the canal as it drew near4 ,then ,i saw that every oar was loosely but firmly fastened to the rowlock1 so that it could be dropped and caught again in a moment2 and that the gay sides of the unwieldy-looking creature were festooned with ropes from the gunwale1 for the men to lay hold of when she capsized1 for the earlier custom of fastening the men to their seats had been quite given up1 because their weight under the water might prevent the boat from righting itself again1 and the men could not come to the surface4 ,now they had a better chance in their freedom1 though why they should not be loosely attached to the boat1 ,i do not quite see4 ,they towed the shining thing through the upper gate of the lock1 and slowly she sank from my sight1 and for some moments was no more to be seen1 for ,i had remained standing where first she passed me4 ,all at once there she was beyond the covert of the lock-head1 abroad and free1 fleeting from the strokes of ten swift oars over the still waters of the bay towards the waves that roared further out where the ground-swell was broken by the rise of the sandy coast4 ,there was no vessel in danger now1 as the talk of the spectators informed me2 it was only for exercise and show that they went out4 ,it seemed all child's play for a time2 but when they got among the broken waves1 then it looked quite another thing4 ,the motion of the waters laid hold upon her1 and soon tossed her fearfully1 now revealing the whole of her capacity on the near side of one of their slopes1 now hiding her whole bulk in one of their hollows beyond4 ,she1 careless as a child in the troubles of the world1 floated about amongst them with what appeared too much buoyancy for the promise of a safe return4 ,again and again she was driven from her course towards the low rocks on the other side of the bay1 and again and again1 returned to disport herself1 like a sea-animal1 as it seemed1 upon the backs of the wild1 rolling1 and bursting billows4 ,can she go no further8 ,i asked of the captain of the coastguard1 whom ,i found standing by my side4 ,not without some danger1 he answered4 ,what1 then1 must it be in a storm6 ,i remarked4 ,then of course1 he returned1 they must take their chance4 ,but there is no good in running risks for nothing4 ,that swell is quite enough for exercise4 ,but is it enough to accustom them to face the danger that will come8 ,i asked4 ,with danger comes courage1 said the old sailor4 ,were you ever afraid8 ,no1 sir4 ,i don't think ,i ever was afraid4 ,yes1 ,i believe ,i was once for one moment1 no more1 when ,i fell from the maintop-gallant yard1 and felt myself falling4 ,but it was soon over1 for ,i only fell into the maintop4 ,i was expecting the smash on deck when ,i was brought up there4 ,but1 he resumed1 ,i don't care much about the life-boat4 ,my rockets are worth a good deal more1 as you may see1 sir1 before the winter is over2 for seldom does a winter pass without at least two or three wrecks close by here on this coast4 ,the full force of the ,atlantic breaks here1 sir4 ,i have seen a life-boat--not that one--she's done nothing yet--pitched stern over stem2 not capsized1 you know1 sir1 in the ordinary way1 but struck by a wave behind while she was just hanging in the balance on the knife-edge of a wave1 and flung a somerset1 as ,i say1 stern over stem1 and four of her men lost4 ,while we spoke ,i saw on the pier-head the tall figure of the painter looking earnestly at the boat4 ,i thought he was regarding it chiefly from an artistic point of view1 but ,i became aware before long that that would not have been consistent with the character of ,charles ,percivale4 ,he had been1 ,i learned afterwards1 a crack oarsman at ,oxford1 and had belonged to the ,university boat1 so that he had some almost class-sympathy with the doings of the crew4 ,in a little while the boat sped swiftly back1 entered the lock1 was lifted above the level of the storm-heaved ocean1 and floated up the smooth canal calmly as if she had never known what trouble was4 ,away up to the pretty little ,tudor-fashioned house in which she lay--one could almost fancy dreaming of storms to come--she went1 as softly as if moved only by her own sweet will1 in the calm consolation for her imprisonment of having tried her strength1 and found therein good hope of success for the time when she should rush to the rescue of men from that to which1 as a monster that begets monsters1 she a watching ,perseis1 lay ready to offer battle4 ,the poor little boat lying in her little house watching the ocean1 was something signified in my eyes1 and not less so after what came in the course of changing seasons and gathered storms4 ,all this time ,i had the keys in my hand1 and now went back to the cottage to restore them to their place upon the wall4 ,when ,i entered there was a young woman of a sweet interesting countenance talking to ,mrs4 ,coombes4 ,now as it happened1 ,i had never yet seen the daughter who lived with her1 and thought this was she4 ,i've found your daughter at last then8 ,i said1 approaching them4 ,not yet1 sir4 ,she goes out to work1 and her hands be pretty full at present4 ,but this be almost my daughter1 sir1 she added4 ,this is my next daughter1 ,mary ,trehern1 from the south4 ,she's got a place near by1 to be near her mother that is to be1 that's me4 ,mary was hanging her head and blushing1 as the old woman spoke4 ,i understand1 ,i said4 ,and when are you going to get your new mother1 ,mary8 ,soon ,i hope4 ,but she gave me no reply--only hung her head lower and blushed deeper4 ,mrs4 ,coombes spoke for her4 ,she's shy1 you see1 sir4 ,but if she was to speak her mind1 she would ask you whether you wouldn't marry her and ,willie when he comes home from his next voyage4 ,mary's hands were trembling now1 and she turned half away4 ,with all my heart1 ,i said4 ,the girl tried to turn towards me1 but could not4 ,i looked at her face a little more closely4 ,through all its tremor1 there was a look of constancy that greatly pleased me4 ,i tried to make her speak4 ,when do you expect ,willie home8 ,i said4 ,she made a little gasp and murmur1 but no articulate words came4 ,don't be frightened1 ,mary1 said her mother1 as ,i found she always called her4 ,the gentleman won't be sharp with you4 ,she lifted a pair of soft brown eyes with one glance and a smile1 and then sank them again4 ,he'll be home in about a month1 we think1 answered the mother4 ,she's a good ship he's aboard of1 and makes good voyages4 ,it is time to think about the bans1 then1 ,i said4 ,if you please1 sir1 said the mother4 ,just come to me about it1 and ,i will attend to it--when you think proper4 ,i thought ,i could hear a murmured ,thank you1 sir1 from the girl1 but ,i could not be certain that she spoke4 ,i shook hands with them1 and went for a stroll on the other side of the bay4 ,,chapter ,v4 ,,mr4 ,,percivale4 ,when ,i reached home ,i found that ,connie was already on her watch-tower4 ,for while ,i was away1 they had carried her out that she might see the life-boat4 ,i followed her1 and found the whole family about her couch1 and with them ,mr4 ,percivale1 who was showing her some sketches that he had made in the neighbourhood4 ,connie knew nothing of drawing2 but she seemed to me always to catch the feeling of a thing4 ,her remarks therefore were generally worth listening to1 and ,mr4 ,percivale was evidently interested in them4 ,wynnie stood behind ,connie1 looking over her shoulder at the drawing in her hand4 ,how do you get that shade of green8 ,i heard her ask as ,i came up4 ,and then ,mr4 ,percivale proceeded to tell her2 from which beginning they went on to other things1 till ,mr4 ,percivale said-- ,but it is hardly fair1 ,miss ,walton2 to criticise my work while you keep your own under cover4 ,i wasn't criticising1 ,mr4 ,percivale2 was ,i1 ,connie8 ,i didn't hear her make a single remark1 ,mr4 ,percivale1 said ,connie1 taking her sister's side4 ,to my surprise they were talking away with the young man as if they had known him for years1 and my wife was seated at the foot of the couch1 apparently taking no exception to the suddenness of the intimacy4 ,i am afraid1 when ,i think of it1 that a good many springs would be missing from the world's history if they might not flow till the papas gave their wise consideration to everything about the course they were to take4 ,i think1 though1 added ,connie1 it is only fair that ,mr4 ,percivale should see your work1 ,wynnie4 ,then ,i will fetch my portfolio1 if ,mr4 ,percivale will promise to remember that ,i have no opinion of it4 ,at the same time1 if ,i could do what ,i wanted to do1 ,i think ,i should not be ashamed of showing my drawings even to him4 ,and now ,i was surprised to find how like grown women my daughters could talk4 ,to me they always spoke like the children they were2 but when ,i heard them now it seemed as if they had started all at once into ladies experienced in the ways of society4 ,there they were chatting lightly1 airily1 and yet decidedly1 a slight tone of badinage interwoven1 with a young man of grace and dignity1 whom they had only seen once before1 and who had advanced no farther1 with ,connie at least1 than a stately bow4 ,they had1 however1 been a whole hour together before ,i arrived1 and their mother had been with them all the while1 which gives great courage to good girls1 while1 ,i am told1 it shuts the mouths of those who are sly4 ,but then it must be remembered that there are as great differences in mothers as in girls4 ,and besides1 ,i believe wise girls have an instinct about men that all the experience of other men cannot overtake4 ,but yet again1 there are many girls foolish enough to mistake a mere impulse for instinct1 and vanity for insight4 ,as ,wynnie spoke1 she turned and went back to the house to fetch some of her work4 ,now1 had she been going a message for me1 she would have gone like the wind2 but on this occasion she stepped along in a stately manner1 far from devoid of grace1 but equally free from frolic or eagerness4 ,and ,i could not help noting as well that ,mr4 ,percivale's eyes followed her4 ,what ,i felt or fancied is of no consequence to anybody4 ,i do not think1 even if ,i were writing an autobiography1 ,i should be forced to tell all about myself4 ,but an autobiography is further from my fancy1 however much ,i may have trenched upon its limits1 than any other form of literature with which ,i am acquainted4 ,she was not long in returning1 however1 though she came back with the same dignified motion4 ,there is nothing really worth either showing or concealing1 she said to ,mr4 ,percivale1 as she handed him the portfolio1 to help himself1 as it were4 ,she then turned away1 as if a little feeling of shyness had come over her1 and began to look for something to do about ,connie4 ,i could see that1 although she had hitherto been almost indifferent about the merit of her drawings1 she had a new-born wish that they might not appear altogether contemptible in the eyes of ,mr4 ,percivale4 ,and ,i saw1 too1 that ,connie's wide eyes were taking in everything4 ,it was wonderful how ,connie's deprivations had made her keen in observing4 ,now she hastened to her sister's rescue even from such a slight inconvenience as the shadow of embarrassment in which she found herself--perhaps from having seen some unusual expression in my face1 of which ,i was unconscious1 though conscious enough of what might have occasioned such4 ,give me your hand1 ,wynnie1 said ,connie1 and help me to move one inch further on my side4--,i may move just that much on my side1 mayn't ,i1 papa8 ,i think you had better not1 my dear1 if you can do without it1 ,i answered2 for the doctor's injunctions had been strong4 ,very well1 papa2 but ,i feel as if it would do me good4 ,mr4 ,turner will be here next week1 you know2 and you must try to stick to his rules till he comes to see you4 ,perhaps he will let you relax a little4 ,connie smiled very sweetly and lay still1 while ,wynnie stood holding her hand4 ,meantime ,mr4 ,percivale1 having received the drawings1 had walked away with them towards what they called the storm tower--a little building standing square to the points of the compass1 from little windows1 in which the coastguard could see with their telescopes along the coast on both sides and far out to sea4 ,this tower stood on the very edge of the cliff1 but behind it there was a steep descent1 to reach which apparently he went round the tower and disappeared4 ,he evidently wanted to make a leisurely examination of the drawings--somewhat formidable for ,wynnie1 ,i thought4 ,at the same time1 it impressed me favourably with regard to the young man that he was not inclined to pay a set of stupid and untrue compliments the instant the portfolio was opened1 but1 on the contrary1 in order to speak what was real about them1 would take the trouble to make himself in some adequate measure acquainted with them4 ,i therefore1 to ,wynnie's relief1 ,i fear1 strolled after him1 seeing no harm in taking a peep at his person1 while he was taking a peep at my daughter's mind4 ,i went round the tower to the other side1 and there saw him at a little distance below me1 but further out on a great rock that overhung the sea1 connected with the cliff by a long narrow isthmus1 a few yards lower than the cliff itself1 only just broad enough to admit of a footpath along its top1 and on one side going sheer down with a smooth hard rock-face to the sands below4 ,the other side was less steep1 and had some grass upon it4 ,but the path was too narrow1 and the precipice too steep1 for me to trust my head with the business of guiding my feet along it4 ,so ,i stood and saw him from the mainland--saw his head at least bent over the drawings2 saw how slowly he turned from one to the other2 saw how1 after having gone over them once1 he turned to the beginning and went over them again1 even more slowly than before2 saw how he turned the third time to the first4 ,then1 getting tired1 ,i went back to the group on the down2 caught sight of ,charlie and ,harry turning heels over head down the slope toward the house2 found that my wife had gone home--in fact1 that only ,connie and ,wynnie were left4 ,the sun had disappeared under a cloud1 and the sea had turned a little slaty2 the yellow flowers in the short down-grass no longer caught the eye with their gold1 and the wind that bent their tops had just the suspicion of an edge in it4 ,and ,wynnie's face looked a little cloudy too1 ,i thought1 and ,i feared that it was my fault4 ,i fancied there was just a tinge of beseeching in ,connie's eye1 as ,i looked at her1 thinking there might be danger for her in the sunlessness of the wind4 ,but ,i do not know that all this1 even the clouding of the sun1 may not have come out of my own mind1 the result of my not being quite satisfied with myself because of the mood ,i had been in4 ,my feeling had altered considerably in the mean time4 ,run1 ,wynnie1 and ask ,mr4 ,percivale1 with my compliments1 to come and lunch with us1 ,i said--more to let her see ,i was not displeased1 however ,i might have looked1 than for any other reason4 ,she went--sedately as before4 ,almost as soon as she was gone1 ,i saw that ,i had put her in a difficulty4 ,for ,i had discovered1 very soon after coming into these parts1 that her head was no more steady than my own on high places1 for she up had never been used to such in our own level country1 except1 indeed1 on the stair that led down to the old quarry and the well1 where1 ,i can remember now1 she always laid her hand on the balustrade with some degree of tremor1 although she had been in the way of going up and down from childhood4 ,but if she could not cross that narrow and really dangerous isthmus1 still less could she call to a man she had never seen but once1 across the intervening chasm4 ,i therefore set off after her1 leaving ,connie lying there in loneliness1 between the sea and the sky4 ,but when ,i got to the other side of the little tower1 instead of finding her standing hesitating on the brink of action1 there she was on the rock beyond4 ,mr4 ,percivale had risen1 and was evidently giving an answer to my invitation2 at least1 the next moment she turned to come back1 and he followed4 ,i stood trembling almost to see her cross the knife-back of that ledge4 ,if ,i had not been almost fascinated1 ,i should have turned and left them to come together1 lest the evil fancy should cross her mind that ,i was watching them1 for it was one thing to watch him with her drawings1 and quite another to watch him with herself4 ,but ,i stood and stared as she crossed4 ,in the middle of the path1 however--up to which point she had been walking with perfect steadiness and composure--she lifted her eyes--by what influence ,i cannot tell--saw me1 looked as if she saw ghost1 half lifted her arms1 swayed as if she would fall1 and1 indeed1 was falling over the precipice when ,percivale1 who was close behind her caught her in his arms1 almost too late for both of them4 ,so nearly down was she already1 that her weight bent him over the rocky side1 till it seemed as if he must yield1 or his body snap4 ,for he bent from the waist1 and looked as if his feet only kept a hold on the ground4 ,it was all over in a moment1 but in that moment it made a sun-picture on my brain1 which returns1 ever and again1 with such vivid agony that ,i cannot hope to get rid of it till ,i get rid of the brain itself in which lies the impress4 ,in another moment they were at my side--she with a wan1 terrified smile1 he in a ruddy alarm4 ,i was unable to speak1 and could only1 with trembling steps1 lead the way from the dreadful spot4 ,i reproached myself afterwards for my want of faith in ,god2 but ,i had not had time to correct myself yet4 ,without a word on their side either1 they followed me4 ,before we reached ,connie1 ,i recovered myself sufficiently to say1 ,not a word to ,connie1 and they understood me4 ,i told ,wynnie to run to the house1 and send ,walter to help me to carry ,connie home4 ,she went1 and1 until ,walter came1 ,i talked to ,mr4 ,percivale as if nothing had happened4 ,and what made me feel yet more friendly towards him was1 that he did not do as some young men wishing to ingratiate themselves would have done3 he did not offer to help me to carry ,connie home4 ,i saw that the offer rose in his mind1 and that he repressed it4 ,he understood that ,i must consider such a permission as a privilege not to be accorded to the acquaintance of a day2 that ,i must know him better before ,i could allow the weight of my child to rest on his strength4 ,i was even grateful to him for this knowledge of human nature4 ,but he responded cordially to my invitation to lunch with us1 and walked by my side as ,walter and ,i bore the precious burden home4 ,during our meal1 he made himself quite agreeable2 talked well on the topics of the day1 not altogether as a man who had made up his mind1 but not the less1 rather the more1 as a man who had thought about them1 and one who did not find it so easy to come to a conclusion as most people do--or possibly as not feeling the necessity of coming to a conclusion1 and therefore preferring to allow the conclusion to grow instead of constructing one for immediate use4 ,this ,i rather liked than otherwise4 ,his behaviour1 ,i need hardly say1 after what ,i have told of him already1 was entirely that of a gentleman2 and his education was good4 ,but what ,i did not like was1 that as often as the conversation made a bend in the direction of religious matters1 he was sure to bend it away in some other direction as soon as ever he laid his next hold upon it4 ,this1 however1 might have various reasons to account for it1 and ,i would wait4 ,after lunch1 as we rose from the table1 he took ,wynnie's portfolio from the side-table where he had laid it1 and with no more than a bow and thanks returned it to her4 ,she1 ,i thought1 looked a little disappointed1 though she said as lightly as she could3 ,i am afraid you have not found anything worthy of criticism in my poor attempts1 ,mr4 ,percivale8 ,on the contrary1 ,i shall be most happy to tell you what ,i think of them if you would like to hear the impression they have made upon me1 he replied1 holding out his hand to take the portfolio again4 ,i shall be greatly obliged to you1 she said1 returning it1 for ,i have had no one to help me since ,i left school1 except a book called ,modern ,painters1 which ,i think has the most beautiful things in it ,i ever read1 but which ,i lay down every now and then with a kind of despair1 as if ,i never could do anything worth doing4 ,how long the next volume is in coming6 ,do you know the author1 ,mr4 ,percivale8 ,i wish ,i did4 ,he has given me much help4 ,i do not say ,i can agree with everything he writes2 but when ,i do not1 ,i have such a respect for him that ,i always feel as if he must be right whether he seems to me to be right or not4 ,and if he is severe1 it is with the severity of love that will speak only the truth4 ,this last speech fell on my ear like the tone of a church bell4 ,that will do1 my friend1 thought ,i4 ,but ,i said nothing to interrupt4 ,by this time he had laid the portfolio open on the side-table1 and placed a chair in front of it for my daughter4 ,then seating himself by her side1 but without the least approach to familiarity1 he began to talk to her about her drawings1 praising1 in general1 the feeling1 but finding fault with the want of nicety in the execution--at least so it appeared to me from what ,i could understand of the conversation4 ,but1 said my daughter1 it seems to me that if you get the feeling right1 that is the main thing4 ,no doubt1 returned ,mr4 ,percivale2 so much the main thing that any imperfection or coarseness or untruth which interferes with it becomes of the greatest consequence4 ,but can it really interfere with the feeling8 ,perhaps not with most people1 simply because most people observe so badly that their recollections of nature are all blurred and blotted and indistinct1 and therefore the imperfections we are speaking of do not affect them4 ,but with the more cultivated it is otherwise4 ,it is for them you ought to work1 for you do not thereby lose the others4 ,besides1 the feeling is always intensified by the finish1 for that belongs to the feeling too1 and must1 ,i should think1 have some influence even where it is not noted4 ,but is it not a hopeless thing to attempt the finish of nature8 ,not at all2 to the degree1 that is1 in which you can represent anything else of nature4 ,but in this drawing now you have no representative of1 nothing to hint at or recall the feeling of the exquisiteness of nature's finish4 ,why should you not at least have drawn a true horizon-line there8 ,has the absolute truth of the meeting of sea and sky nothing to do with the feeling which such a landscape produces8 ,i should have thought you would have learned that1 if anything1 from ,mr4 ,ruskin4 ,mr4 ,percivale spoke earnestly4 ,wynnie1 either from disappointment or despair1 probably from a mixture of both1 apparently fancied that1 or rather felt as if1 he was scolding her1 and got cross4 ,this was anything but dignified1 especially with a stranger1 and one who was doing his best to help her4 ,and yet1 somehow1 ,i must with shame confess ,i was not altogether sorry to see it4 ,in fact1 my reader1 ,i must just uncover my sin1 and say that ,i felt a little jealous of ,mr4 ,percivale4 ,the negative reason was that ,i had not yet learned to love him4 ,the only cure for jealousy is love4 ,but ,i was ashamed too of ,wynnie's behaving so childishly4 ,her face flushed1 the tears came in her eyes1 and she rose1 saying1 with a little choke in her voice-- ,i see it's no use trying4 ,i won't intrude any more into things ,i am incapable of4 ,i am much obliged to you1 ,mr4 ,percivale1 for showing me how presumptuous ,i have been4 ,the painter rose as she rose1 looking greatly concerned4 ,but he did not attempt to answer her4 ,indeed she gave him no time4 ,he could only spring after her to open the door for her4 ,a more than respectful bow as she left the room was his only adieu4 ,but when he turned his face again towards me1 it expressed even a degree of consternation4 ,i fear1 he said1 approaching me with an almost military step1 much at variance with the shadow upon his countenance1 ,i fear ,i have been rude to ,miss ,walton1 but nothing was farther-- ,you mistake entirely1 ,mr4 ,percivale4 ,i heard all you were saying1 and you were not in the least rude4 ,on the contrary1 ,i consider you were very kind to take the trouble with her you did4 ,allow me to make the apology for my daughter which ,i am sure she will wish made when she recovers from the disappointment of finding more obstacles in the way of her favourite pursuit than she had previously supposed4 ,she is only too ready to lose heart1 and she paid too little attention to your approbation and too much--in proportion1 ,i mean--to your--criticism4 ,she felt discouraged and lost her temper1 but more with herself and her poor attempts1 ,i venture to assure you1 than with your remarks upon them4 ,she is too much given to despising her own efforts4 ,but ,i must have been to blame if ,i caused any such feeling with regard to those drawings1 for ,i assure you they contain great promise4 ,i am glad you think so4 ,that ,i should myself be of the same opinion can be of no consequence4 ,miss ,walton at least sees what ought to be represented4 ,all she needs is greater severity in the quality of representation4 ,and that would have grown without any remark from onlookers4 ,only a friendly criticism is sometimes a great help4 ,it opens the eyes a little sooner than they would have opened of themselves4 ,and time1 he added1 with a half sigh and with an appeal in his tone1 as if he would justify himself to my conscience1 is half the battle in this world4 ,it is over so soon4 ,no sooner than it ought to be1 ,i rejoined4 ,so it may appear to you1 he returned2 for you1 ,i presume to conjecture1 have worked hard and done much4 ,i may or may not have worked hard--sometimes ,i think ,i have1 sometimes ,i think ,i have not--but ,i certainly have done little4 ,here ,i am nearly thirty1 and have made no mark on the world yet4 ,i don't know that that is of so much consequence1 ,i said4 ,i have never hoped for more than to rub out a few of the marks already made4 ,perhaps you are right1 he returned4 ,every man has something he can do1 and more1 ,i suppose1 that he can't do4 ,but ,i have no right to turn a visit into a visitation4 ,will you please tell ,miss ,walton that ,i am very sorry ,i presumed on the privileges of a drawing-master1 and gave her pain4 ,it was so far from my intention that it will be a lesson to me for the future4 ,with these words he took his leave1 and ,i could not help being greatly pleased both with them and with his bearing4 ,he was clearly anything but a common man4 ,,chapter ,,vi4 ,,the ,,shadow ,,op ,,death4 ,when ,wynnie appeared at dinner she looked ashamed of herself1 and her face betrayed that she had been crying4 ,but ,i said nothing1 for ,i had confidence that all she needed was time to come to herself1 that the voice that speaks louder than any thunder might make its stillness heard4 ,and when ,i came home from my walk the next morning ,i found ,mr4 ,percivale once more in the group about ,connie1 and evidently on the best possible terms with all4 ,the same afternoon ,wynnie went out sketching with ,dora4 ,i had no doubt that she had made some sort of apology to ,mr4 ,percivale2 but ,i did not make the slightest attempt to discover what had passed between them1 for though it is of all things desirable that children should be quite open with their parents1 ,i was most anxious to lay upon them no burden of obligation4 ,for such burden lies against the door of utterance1 and makes it the more difficult to open4 ,it paralyses the speech of the soul4 ,what ,i desired was that they should trust me so that faith should overcome all difficulty that might lie in the way of their being open with me4 ,that end is not to be gained by any urging of admonition4 ,against such1 growing years at least1 if nothing else1 will bring a strong reaction4 ,nor even1 if so gained would the gain be at all of the right sort4 ,the openness would not be faith4 ,besides1 a parent must respect the spiritual person of his child1 and approach it with reverence1 for that too looks the ,father in the face1 and has an audience with him into which no earthly parent can enter even if he dared to desire it4 ,therefore ,i trusted my child4 ,and when ,i saw that she looked at me a little shyly when we next met1 ,i only sought to show her the more tenderness and confidence1 telling her all about my plans with the bells1 and my talks with the smith and ,mrs4 ,coombes4 ,she listened with just such interest as ,i had always been accustomed to see in her1 asking such questions1 and making such remarks as ,i might have expected1 but ,i still felt that there was the thread of a little uneasiness through the web of our intercourse1--such a thread of a false colour as one may sometimes find wandering through the labour of the loom1 and seek with pains to draw from the woven stuff4 ,but it was for ,wynnie to take it out1 not for me4 ,and she did not leave it long4 ,for as she bade me good-night in my study1 she said suddenly1 yet with hesitating openness1 ,papa1 ,i told ,mr4 ,percivale that ,i was sorry ,i had behaved so badly about the drawings4 ,you did right1 my child1 ,i replied4 ,at the same moment a pang of anxiety passed through me lest under the influence of her repentance she should have said anything more than becoming4 ,but ,i banished the doubt instantly as faithlessness in the womanly instincts of my child4 ,for we men are always so ready and anxious to keep women right1 like the wretched creature1 ,laertes1 in ,hamlet1 who reads his sister such a lesson on her maidenly duties1 but declines almost with contempt to listen to a word from her as to any co-relative obligation on his side6 ,and here ,i may remark in regard to one of the vexed questions of the day--the rights of women--that what women demand it is not for men to withhold4 ,it is not their business to lay the law for women4 ,that women must lay down for themselves4 ,i confess that1 although ,i must herein seem to many of my readers old-fashioned and conservative1 ,i should not like to see any woman ,i cared much for either in parliament or in an anatomical class-room2 but on the other hand ,i feel that women must be left free to settle that matter4 ,if it is not good1 good women will find it out and recoil from it4 ,if it is good then ,god give them good speed4 ,one thing they have a right to--a far wider and more valuable education than they have been in the way of receiving4 ,when the mothers are well taught the generations will grow in knowledge at a fourfold rate4 ,but still the teaching of life is better than all the schools1 and common sense than all learning4 ,this common sense is a rare gift1 scantier in none than in those who lay claim to it on the ground of following commonplace1 worldly1 and prudential maxims4 ,but ,i must return to my ,wynnie4 ,and what did ,mr4 ,percivale say8 ,i resumed1 for she was silent4 ,he took the blame all on himself1 papa4 ,like a gentleman1 ,i said4 ,but ,i could not leave it so1 you know1 papa1 because that was not the truth4 ,well8 ,i told him that ,i had lost my temper from disappointment2 that ,i had thought ,i did not care for my drawings because ,i was so far from satisfied with them1 but when he made me feel that they were worth nothing1 then ,i found from the vexation ,i felt that ,i had cared for them4 ,but ,i do think1 papa1 ,i was more ashamed of having shown them1 and vexed with myself1 than cross with him4 ,but ,i was very silly4 ,well1 and what did he say8 ,he began to praise them then4 ,but you know ,i could not take much of that1 for what could he do8 ,you might give him credit for a little honesty1 at least4 ,yes2 but things may be true in a way1 you know1 and not mean much4 ,he seems to have succeeded in reconciling you to the prosecution of your efforts1 however2 for ,i saw you go out with your sketching apparatus this afternoon4 ,yes1 she answered shyly4 ,he was so kind that somehow ,i got heart to try again4 ,he's very nice1 isn't he8 ,my answer was not quite ready4 ,don't you like him1 papa8 ,well--,i like him--yes4 ,but we must not be in haste with our judgments1 you know4 ,i have had very little opportunity of seeing into him4 ,there is much in him that ,i like1 but-- ,but what8 please1 papa4 ,to tell the truth then1 ,wynnie1 for ,i can speak my mind to you1 my child1 there is a certain shyness of approaching the subject of religion2 so that ,i have my fears lest he should belong to any of these new schools of a fragmentary philosophy which acknowledge no source of truth but the testimony of the senses and the deductions made therefrom by the intellect4 ,but is not that a hasty conclusion1 papa8 ,that is a hasty question1 my dear4 ,i have come to no conclusion4 ,i was only speaking confidentially about my fears4 ,perhaps1 papa1 it's only that he's not sure enough1 and is afraid of appearing to profess more than he believes4 ,i'm sure1 if that's it1 ,i have the greatest sympathy with him4 ,i looked at her1 and saw the tears gathering fast in her eyes4 ,pray to ,god on the chance of his hearing you1 my darling1 and go to sleep1 ,i said4 ,i will not think hardly of you because you cannot be so sure as ,i am4 ,how could you be8 ,you have not had my experience4 ,perhaps you are right about ,mr4 ,percivale too4 ,but it would be an awkward thing to get intimate with him1 you know1 and then find out that we did not like him after all4 ,you couldn't like a man much1 could you1 who did not believe in anything greater than himself1 anything marvellous1 grand1 beyond our understanding--who thought that he had come out of the dirt and was going back to the dirt8 ,i could1 papa1 if he tried to do his duty notwithstanding--for ,i'm sure ,i couldn't4 ,i should cry myself to death4 ,you are right1 my child4 ,i should honour him too4 ,but ,i should be very sorry for him4 ,for he would be so disappointed in himself4 ,i do not know whether this was the best answer to make1 but ,i had little time to think4 ,but you don't know that he's like that4 ,i do not1 my dear4 ,and more1 ,i will not associate the idea with him till ,i know for certain4 ,we will leave it to ignorant old ladies who lay claim to an instinct for theology to jump at conclusions1 and reserve ours--as even such a man as we have been supposing might well teach us--till we have sufficient facts from which to draw them4 ,now go to bed1 my child4 ,good-night then1 dear papa1 she said1 and left me with a kiss4 ,i was not altogether comfortable after this conversation4 ,i had tried to be fair to the young man both in word and thought1 but ,i could not relish the idea of my daughter falling in love with him1 which looked likely enough1 before ,i knew more about him1 and found that more good and hope-giving4 ,there was but one rational thing left to do1 and that was to cast my care on him that careth for us--on the ,father who loved my child more than even ,i could love her--and loved the young man too1 and regarded my anxiety1 and would take its cause upon himself4 ,after ,i had lifted up my heart to him ,i was at ease1 read a canto of ,dante's ,paradise1 and then went to bed4 ,the prematurity of a conversation with my wife1 in which ,i found that she was very favourably impressed with ,mr4 ,percivale1 must be pardoned to the forecasting hearts of fathers and mothers4 ,as ,i went out for my walk the next morning1 ,i caught sight of the sexton1 with whom as yet ,i had had but little communication1 busily trimming some of the newer graves in the churchyard4 ,i turned in through the nearer gate1 which was fashioned like a lych-gate1 with seats on the sides and a stone table in the centre1 but had no roof4 ,the one on the other side of the church was roofed1 but probably they had found that here no roof could resist the sea-blasts in winter4 ,the top of the wall where the roof should have rested1 was simply covered with flat slates to protect it from the rain4 ,good-morning1 ,coombes1 ,i said4 ,he turned up a wizened1 humorous old face1 the very type of a gravedigger's1 and with one hand leaning on the edge of the green mound1 upon which he had been cropping with a pair of shears the too long and too thin grass1 touched his cap with the other1 and bade me a cheerful good-morning in return4 ,you're making things tidy1 ,i said4 ,it take time to make them all comfortable1 you see1 sir1 he returned1 taking up his shears again and clipping away at the top and sides of the mound4 ,you mean the dead1 ,coombes8 ,yes1 sir2 to be sure1 sir4 ,you don't think it makes much difference to their comfort1 do you1 whether the grass is one length or another upon their graves8 ,well no1 sir4 ,i don't suppose it makes much difference to them4 ,but it look more comfortable1 you know4 ,and ,i like things to look comfortable4 ,don't you1 sir8 ,to be sure ,i do1 ,coombes4 ,and you are quite right4 ,the resting-place of the body1 although the person it belonged to be far away1 should be respected4 ,that's what ,i think1 though ,i don't get no credit for it4 ,i du believe the people hereabouts thinks me only a single hair better than a ,jack ,ketch4 ,but ,i'm sure ,i du my best to make the poor things comfortable4 ,he seemed unable to rid his mind of the idea that the comfort of the departed was dependent upon his ministrations4 ,the trouble ,i have with them sometimes6 ,there's now this same one as lies here1 old ,jonathan ,giles4 ,he have the gout so bad6 and just as ,i come within a couple o' inches o' the right depth1 out come the edge of a great stone in the near corner at the foot of the bed4 ,thinks ,i1 he'll never lie comfortable with that same under his gouty toe4 ,but the trouble ,i had to get out that stone6 ,i du assure you1 sir1 it took me nigh half the day4--,but this be one of the nicest places to lie in all up and down the coast--a nice gravelly soil1 you see1 sir2 dry1 and warm1 and comfortable4 ,them poor things as comes out of the sea must quite enjoy the change1 sir4 ,there was something grotesque in the man's persistence in regarding the objects of his interest from this point of view4 ,it was a curious way for the humanity that was in him to find expression2 but ,i did not like to let him go on thus4 ,it was so much opposed to all that ,i believed and felt about the change from this world to the next6 ,but1 ,coombes1 ,i said1 why will you go on talking as if it made an atom of difference to the dead bodies where they were buried8 ,they care no more about it than your old coat would care where it was thrown after you had done with it4 ,he turned and regarded his coat where it hung beside him on the headstone of the same grave at which he was working1 shook his head with a smile that seemed to hint a doubt whether the said old coat would be altogether so indifferent to its treatment when1 it was past use as ,i had implied4 ,then he turned again to his work1 and after a moment's silence began to approach me from another side4 ,i confess he had the better of me before ,i was aware of what he was about4 ,the church of ,boscastle stands high on the cliff4 ,you've been to ,boscastle1 sir8 ,i told him ,i had not yet1 but hoped to go before the summer was over4 ,ah1 you should see ,boscastle1 sir4 ,it's a wonderful place4 ,that's where ,i was born1 sir4 ,when ,i was a by that church was haunted1 sir4 ,it's a damp place1 and the wind in it awful4 ,i du believe it stand higher than any church in the country1 and have got more wind in it of a stormy night than any church whatsomever4 ,well1 they said it was haunted2 and sure enough every now and then there was a knocking heard down below4 ,and this always took place of a stormy night1 as if there was some poor thing down in the low wouts 7vaults71 and he wasn't comfortable and wanted to get out4 ,well1 one night it was so plain and so fearful it was that the sexton he went and took the blacksmith and a ship's carpenter down to the harbour1 and they go up together1 and they hearken all over the floor1 and they open one of the old family wouts that belongs to the ,penhaligans1 and they go down with a light4 ,now the wind it was a-blowing all as usual1 only worse than common4 ,and there to be sure what do they see but the wout half-full of sea-water1 and nows and thens a great spout coming in through a hole in the rock2 for it was high-water and a wind off the sea1 as ,i tell you4 ,and there was a coffin afloat on the water1 and every time the spout come through1 it set it knocking agen the side o' the wout1 and that was the ghost4 ,what a horrible idea6 ,i said1 with a half-shudder at the unrest of the dead4 ,the old man uttered a queer long-drawn sound1--neither a chuckle1 a crow1 nor a laugh1 but a mixture of all three1--and turned himself yet again to the work which1 as he approached the end of his narration1 he had suspended1 that he might make his story tell1 ,i suppose1 by looking me in the face4 ,and as he turned he said1 ,i thought you would like to be comfortable then as well as other people1 sir4 ,i could not help laughing to see how the cunning old fellow had caught me4 ,i have not yet been able to find out how much of truth there was in his story4 ,from the twinkle of his eye ,i cannot help suspecting that if he did not invent the tale1 he embellished it1 at least1 in order to produce the effect which he certainly did produce4 ,humour was clearly his predominant disposition1 the reflex of which was to be seen1 after a mild lunar fashion1 on the countenance of his wife4 ,neither could ,i help thinking with pleasure1 as ,i turned away1 how the merry little old man would enjoy telling his companions how he had posed the new parson4 ,very welcome was he to his laugh for my part4 ,yet ,i gladly left the churchyard1 with its sunshine above and its darkness below4 ,indeed ,i had to look up to the glittering vanes on the four pinnacles of the church-tower1 dwelling aloft in the clean sunny air1 to get the feeling of the dark vault1 and the floating coffin1 and the knocking heard in the windy church1 out of my brain4 ,but the thing that did free me was the reflection with what supreme disregard the disincarcerated spirit would look upon any possible vicissitudes of its abandoned vault4 ,for in proportion as the body of man's revelation ceases to be in harmony with the spirit that dwells therein1 it becomes a vault1 a prison1 from which it must be freedom to escape at length4 ,the house we like best would be a prison of awful sort if doors and windows were built up4 ,man's abode1 as age begins to draw nigh1 fares thus4 ,age is in fact the mason that builds up the doors and the windows1 and death is the angel that breaks the prison-house and lets the captives free4 ,thus ,i got something out of the sexton's horrible story4 ,but before the week was over1 death came near indeed--in far other fashion than any funereal tale could have brought it4 ,one day1 after lunch1 ,i had retired to my study1 and was dozing in my chair1 for the day was hot1 when ,i was waked by ,charlie rushing into the room with the cry1 ,papa1 papa1 there's a man drowning4 ,i started up1 and hurried down to the drawing-room1 which looked out over the bay4 ,i could see nothing but people running about on the edge of the quiet waves4 ,no sign of human being was on--the water4 ,but the one boat belonging to the pilot was coming out from the shelter of the lock of the canal where it usually lay1 and my friend of the coastguard was running down from the tower on the cliff with ropes in his hand4 ,he would not stop the boat even for the moment it would need to take him on board1 but threw them in and urged to haste4 ,i stood at the window and watched4 ,every now and then ,i fancied ,i saw something white heaved up on the swell of a wave1 and as often was satisfied that ,i had but fancied it4 ,the boat seemed to be floating about lazily1 if not idly4 ,the eagerness to help made it appear as if nothing was going on4 ,could it1 after all1 have been a false alarm8 ,was there1 after all1 no insensible form swinging about in the sweep of those waves1 with life gradually oozing away8 ,long1 long as it seemed to me1 ,i watched1 and still the boat kept moving from place to place1 so far out that ,i could see nothing distinctly of the motions of its crew4 ,at length ,i saw something4 ,yes2 a long white thing rose from the water slowly1 and was drawn into the boat4 ,it rowed swiftly to the shore4 ,there was but one place fit to land upon1--a little patch of sand1 nearly covered at high-water1 but now lying yellow in the sun1 under the window at which ,i stood1 and immediately under our garden-wall4 ,thither the boat shot along2 and there my friend of the coastguard1 earnest and sad1 was waiting to use1 though without hope1 every appliance so well known to him from the frequent occurrence of such necessity in the course of his watchful duties along miles and miles of stormy coast4 ,i will not linger over the sad details of vain endeavour4 ,the honoured head of a family1 he had departed and left a good name behind him4 ,but even in the midst of my poor attentions to the quiet1 speechless1 pale-faced wife1 who sat at the head of the corpse1 ,i could not help feeling anxious about the effect on my ,connie4 ,it was impossible to keep the matter concealed from her4 ,the undoubted concern on the faces of the two boys was enough to reveal that something serious and painful had occurred2 while my wife and ,wynnie1 and indeed the whole household1 were busy in attending to every remotest suggestion of aid that reached them from the little crowd gathered about the body4 ,at length it was concluded1 on the verdict of the medical man who had been sent for1 that all further effort was useless4 ,the body was borne away1 and ,i led the poor lady to her lodging1 and remained there with her till ,i found that1 as she lay on the sofa1 the sleep that so often dogs the steps of sorrow had at length thrown its veil over her consciousness1 and put her for the time to rest4 ,there is a gentle consolation in the firmness of the grasp of the inevitable1 known but to those who are led through the valley of the shadow4 ,i left her with her son and daughter1 and returned to my own family4 ,they too were of course in the skirts of the cloud4 ,had they only heard of the occurrence1 it would have had little effect2 but death had appeared to them4 ,everyone but ,connie had seen the dead lying there2 and before the day was over1 ,i wished that she too had seen the dead4 ,for ,i found from what she said at intervals1 and from the shudder that now and then passed through her1 that her imagination was at work1 showing but the horrors that belong to death2 for the enfolding peace that accompanies it can be known but by sight of the dead4 ,when ,i spoke to her1 she seemed1 and ,i suppose for the time felt tolerably quiet and comfortable2 but ,i could see that the words she had heard fall in the going and coming1 and the communications of ,charlie and ,harry to each other1 had made as it were an excoriation on her fancy1 to which her consciousness was ever returning4 ,and now ,i became more grateful than ,i had yet been for the gift of that gipsy-child4 ,for ,i felt no anxiety about ,connie so long as she was with her4 ,the presence even of her mother could not relieve her1 for she and ,wynnie were both clouded with the same awe1 and its reflex in ,connie was distorted by her fancy4 ,but the sweet ignorance of the baby1 which rightly considered is more than a type or symbol of faith1 operated most healingly2 for she appeared in her sweet merry ways--no baby was ever more filled with the mere gladness of life than ,connie's baby--to the mood in which they all were1 like a little sunny window in a cathedral crypt1 telling of a whole universe of sunshine and motion beyond those oppressed pillars and low-groined arches4 ,and why should not the baby know best8 ,i believe the babies do know best4 ,i therefore favoured her having the child more than ,i might otherwise have thought good for her1 being anxious to get the dreary1 unhealthy impression healed as soon as possible1 lest it should1 in the delicate physical condition in which she was1 turn to a sore4 ,but my wife suffered for a time nearly as much as ,connie4 ,as long as she was going about the house or attending to the wants of her family1 she was free2 but no sooner did she lay her head on the pillow than in rushed the cry of the sea1 fierce1 unkind1 craving like a wild beast4 ,again and again she spoke of it to me1 for it came to her mingled with the voice of the tempter1 saying1 ,cruel chance1 over and over again4 ,for although the two words contradict each other when put together thus1 each in its turn would assert itself4 ,a great part of the doubt in the world comes from the fact that there are in it so many more of the impressible as compared with the originating minds4 ,where the openness to impression is balanced by the power of production1 the painful questions of the world are speedily met by their answers2 where such is not the case1 there are often long periods of suffering till the child-answer of truth is brought to the birth4 ,hence the need for every impressible mind to be1 by reading or speech1 held in living association with an original mind able to combat those suggestions of doubt and even unbelief1 which the look of things must often occasion--a look which comes from our inability to gain other than fragmentary visions of the work that the ,father worketh hitherto4 ,when the kingdom of heaven is at hand1 one sign thereof will be that all clergymen will be more or less of the latter sort1 and mere receptive goodness1 no more than education and moral character1 will be considered sufficient reason for a man's occupying the high position of an instructor of his fellows4 ,but even now this possession of original power is not by any means to be limited to those who make public show of the same4 ,in many a humble parish priest it shows itself at the bedside of the suffering1 or in the admonition of the closet1 although as yet there are many of the clergy who1 so far from being able to console wisely1 are incapable of understanding the condition of those that need consolation4 ,it is all a fancy1 my dear1 ,i said to her4 ,there is nothing more terrible in this than in any other death4 ,on the contrary1 ,i can hardly imagine a less fearful one4 ,a big wave falls on the man's head and stuns him1 and without further suffering he floats gently out on the sea of the unknown4 ,but it is so terrible for those left behind6 ,had you seen the face of his widow1 so gentle1 so loving1 so resigned in its pallor1 you would not have thought it so terrible4 ,but though she always seemed satisfied1 and no doubt felt nearly so1 after any conversation of the sort1 yet every night she would call out once and again1 ,o1 that sea1 out there6 ,i was very glad indeed when ,mr4 ,turner1 who had arranged to spend a short holiday with us1 arrived4 ,he was concerned at the news ,i gave him of the shock both ,connie and her mother had received1 and counselled an immediate change1 that time might1 in the absence of surrounding associations1 obliterate something of the impression that had been made4 ,the consequence was1 that we resolved to remove our household1 for a short time1 to some place not too far off to permit of my attending to my duties at ,kilkhaven1 but out of the sight and sound of the sea4 ,it was ,thursday when ,mr4 ,turner arrived1 and he spent the next two days in inquiring and looking about for a suitable spot to which we might repair as early in the week as possible4 ,on the ,saturday the blacksmith was busy in the church-tower1 and ,i went in to see how he was getting on4 ,you had a sad business here the last week1 sir1 he said1 after we had done talking about the repairs4 ,a very sad business indeed1 ,i answered4 ,it was a warning to us all1 he said4 ,we may well take it so1 ,i returned4 ,but it seems to me that we are too ready to think of such remarkable things only by themselves1 instead of being roused by them to regard everything1 common and uncommon1 as ordered by the same care and wisdom4 ,one of our local preachers made a grand use of it4 ,i made no reply4 ,he resumed4 ,they tell me you took no notice of it last ,sunday1 sir4 ,i made no immediate allusion to it1 certainly4 ,but ,i preached under the influence of it4 ,and ,i thought it better that those who could reflect on the matter should be thus led to think for themselves than that they should be subjected to the reception of my thoughts and feelings about it2 for in the main it is life and not death that we have to preach4 ,i don't quite understand you1 sir4 ,but then you don't care much for preaching in your church4 ,i confess1 ,i answered1 that there has been much indifference on that point4 ,i could1 however1 mention to you many and grand exceptions4 ,still there is1 even in some of the best in the church1 a great amount of disbelief in the efficacy of preaching4 ,and ,i allow that a great deal of what is called preaching1 partakes of its nature only in the remotest degree4 ,but1 while ,i hold a strong opinion of its value--that is1 where it is genuine--,i venture just to suggest that the nature of the preaching to which the body you belong to has resorted1 has had something to do1 by way of a reaction1 in driving the church to the other extreme4 ,how do you mean that1 sir8 ,you try to work upon people's feelings without reference to their judgment4 ,anyone who can preach what you call rousing sermons is considered a grand preacher amongst you1 and there is a great danger of his being led thereby to talk more nonsense than sense4 ,and then when the excitement goes off1 there is no seed left in the soil to grow in peace1 and they are always craving after more excitement4 ,well1 there is the preacher to rouse them up again4 ,and the consequence is that they continue like children--the good ones1 ,i mean--and have hardly a chance of making a calm1 deliberate choice of that which is good2 while those who have been only excited and nothing more1 are hardened and seared by the recurrence of such feeling as is neither aroused by truth nor followed by action4 ,you daren't talk like that if you knew the kind of people in this country that the ,methodists1 as you call them1 have got a hold of4 ,they tell me it was like hell itself down in those mines before ,wesley come among them4 ,i should be a fool or a bigot to doubt that the ,wesleyans have done incalculable good in the country4 ,and that not alone to the people who never went to church4 ,the whole ,church of ,england is under obligations to ,methodism such as no words can overstate4 ,i wonder you can say such things against them1 then4 ,now there you show the evil of thinking too much about the party you belong to4 ,it makes a man touchy2 and then he fancies when another is merely1 it may be1 analysing a difference1 or insisting strongly on some great truth1 that he is talking against his party4 ,but you said1 sir1 that our clergy don't care about moving our judgments1 only our feelings4 ,now ,i know preachers amongst us of whom that would be anything but true4 ,of course there must be4 ,but there is what ,i say--your party-feeling makes you touchy4 ,a man can't always be saying in the press of utterance1 ',of course there are exceptions4' ,that is understood4 ,i confess ,i do not know much about your clergy1 for ,i have not had the opportunity4 ,but ,i do know this1 that some of the best and most liberal people ,i have ever known have belonged to your community4 ,they do gather a deal of money for good purposes4 ,yes4 ,but that was not what ,i meant by liberal4 ,it is far easier to give money than to be generous in judgment4 ,i meant by liberal1 able to see the good and true in people that differ from you--glad to be roused to the reception of truth in ,god's name from whatever quarter it may come1 and not readily finding offence where a remark may have chanced to be too sweeping or unguarded4 ,but ,i see that ,i ought to be more careful1 for ,i have made you1 who certainly are not one of the quarrelsome people ,i have been speaking of1 misunderstand me4 ,i beg your pardon1 sir4 ,i was hasty4 ,but ,i do think ,i am more ready to lose my temper since-- ,here he stopped4 ,a fit of coughing came on1 and1 to my concern1 was followed by what ,i saw plainly could be the result only of a rupture in the lungs4 ,i insisted on his dropping his work and coming home with me1 where ,i made him rest the remainder of the day and all ,sunday1 sending word to his mother that ,i could not let him go home4 ,when we left on the ,monday morning1 we took him with us in the carriage hired for the journey1 and set him down at his mother's1 apparently no worse than usual4 ,,chapter ,,vii4 ,,at ,,the ,,farm4 ,leaving the younger members of the family at home with the servants1 we set out for a farmhouse1 some twenty miles off1 which ,turner had discovered for us4 ,connie had stood the journey down so well1 and was now so much stronger1 that we had no anxiety about her so far as regarded the travelling4 ,through deep lanes with many cottages1 and here and there a very ugly little chapel1 over steep hills1 up which ,turner and ,wynnie and ,i walked1 and along sterile moors we drove1 stopping at roadside inns1 and often besides to raise ,connie and let her look about upon the extended prospect1 so that it was drawing towards evening before we arrived at our destination4 ,on the way ,turner had warned us that we were not to expect a beautiful country1 although the place was within reach of much that was remarkable4 ,therefore we were not surprised when we drew up at the door of a bare-looking1 shelterless house1 with scarcely a tree in sight1 and a stretch of undulating fields on every side4 ,a dreary place in winter1 ,turner1 ,i said1 after we had seen ,connie comfortably deposited in the nice white-curtained parlour1 smelling of dried roses even in the height of the fresh ones1 and had strolled out while our tea--dinner was being got ready for us4 ,not a doubt of it2 but just the place ,i wanted for ,miss ,connie1 he replied4 ,we are high above the sea1 and the air is very bracing1 and not1 at this season1 too cold4 ,a month later ,i should not on any account have brought her here4 ,i think even now there is a certain freshness in the wind that calls up a kind of will in the nerves to meet it4 ,that is precisely what ,i wanted for you all4 ,you observe there is no rasp in its touch1 however4 ,there are regions in this island of ours where even in the hottest day in summer you would frequently discover a certain unfriendly edge in the air1 that would set you wondering whether the seasons had not changed since you were a boy1 and used to lie on the grass half the idle day4 ,i often do wonder whether it may not be so1 but ,i always come to the conclusion that even this is but an example of the involuntary tendency of the mind of man towards the ideal4 ,he forgets all that comes between and divides the hints of perfection scattered here and there along the scope of his experience4 ,i especially remember one summer day in my childhood1 which has coloured all my ideas of summer and bliss and fulfilment of content4 ,it is made up of only mossy grass1 and the scent of the earth and wild flowers1 and hot sun1 and perfect sky--deep and blue1 and traversed by blinding white clouds4 ,i could not have been more than five or six1 ,i think1 from the kind of dress ,i wore1 the very pearl buttons of which1 encircled on their face with a ring of half-spherical hollows1 have their undeniable relation in my memory to the heavens and the earth1 to the march of the glorious clouds1 and the tender scent of the rooted flowers2 and1 indeed1 when ,i think of it1 must1 by the delight they gave me1 have opened my mind the more to the enjoyment of the eternal paradise around me4 ,what a thing it is to please a child6 ,i know what you mean perfectly1 answered ,turner4 ,it is as ,i get older that ,i understand what ,wordsworth says about childhood4 ,it is indeed a mercy that we were not born grown men1 with what we consider our wits about us4 ,they are blinding things those wits we gather4 ,i fancy that the single thread by which ,god sometimes keeps hold of a man is such an impression of his childhood as that of which you have been speaking4 ,i do not doubt it2 for conscience is so near in all those memories to which you refer4 ,the whole surrounding of them is so at variance with sin6 ,a sense of purity1 not in himself1 for the child is not feeling that he is pure1 is all about him2 and when afterwards the condition returns upon him1--returns when he is conscious of so much that is evil and so much that is unsatisfied in him1--it brings with it a longing after the high clear air of moral well-being4 ,do you think1 then1 that it is only by association that nature thus impresses us8 that she has no power of meaning these things8 ,not at all4 ,no doubt there is something in the recollection of the associations of childhood to strengthen the power of nature upon us2 but the power is in nature herself1 else it would be but a poor weak thing to what it is4 ,there is purity and state in that sky4 ,there is a peace now in this wide still earth--not so very beautiful1 you own--and in that overhanging blue1 which my heart cries out that it needs and cannot be well till it gains--gains in the truth1 gains in ,god1 who is the power of truth1 the living and causing truth4 ,there is indeed a rest that remaineth1 a rest pictured out even here this night1 to rouse my dull heart to desire it and follow after it1 a rest that consists in thinking the thoughts of ,him who is the ,peace because the ,unity1 in being filled with that spirit which now pictures itself forth in this repose of the heavens and the earth4 ,true1 said ,turner1 after a pause4 ,i must think more about such things4 ,the science the present day is going wild about will not give us that rest4 ,no2 but that rest will do much to give you that science4 ,a man with this repose in his heart will do more by far1 other capabilities being equal1 to find out the laws that govern things4 ,for all law is living rest4 ,what you have been saying1 resumed ,turner1 after another pause1 reminds me much of one of ,wordsworth's poems4 ,i do not mean the famous ode4 ,you mean the ',ninth ,evening ,voluntary1' ,i know--one of his finest and truest and deepest poems4 ,it begins1 ',had this effulgence disappeared4' ,yes1 that is the one ,i mean4 ,i shall read it again when ,i go home4 ,but you don't agree with ,wordsworth1 do you1 about our having had an existence previous to this8 ,he gave a little laugh as he asked the question4 ,not in the least4 ,but an opinion held by such men as ,plato1 ,origen1 and ,wordsworth1 is not to be laughed at1 ,mr4 ,turner4 ,it cannot be in its nature absurd4 ,i might have mentioned ,shelley as holding it1 too1 had his opinion been worth anything4 ,then you don't think much of ,shelley8 ,i think his feeling most valuable2 his opinion nearly worthless4 ,well1 perhaps ,i had no business to laugh1 at it2 but-- ,do not suppose for a moment that ,i even lean to it4 ,i dislike it4 ,it would make me unhappy to think there was the least of sound argument for it4 ,but ,i respect the men who have held it1 and know there must be something good in it1 else they could not have held it4 ,are you able then to sympathise with that ode of ,wordsworth's8 ,does it not depend for all its worth on the admission of this theory8 ,not in the least4 ,is it necessary to admit that we must have had a conscious life before this life to find meaning in the words1-- ',but trailing clouds of glory do we come ,from ,god who is our home'8 ,is not all the good in us his image8 ,imperfect and sinful as we are1 is not all the foundation of our being his image8 ,is not the sin all ours1 and the life in us all ,god's8 ,we cannot be the creatures of ,god without partaking of his nature4 ,every motion of our conscience1 every admiration of what is pure and noble1 is a sign and a result of this4 ,is not every self-accusation a proof of the presence of his spirit8 ,that comes not of ourselves--that is not without him4 ,these are the clouds of glory we come trailing from him4 ,all feelings of beauty and peace and loveliness and right and goodness1 we trail with us from our home4 ,god is the only home of the human soul4 ,to interpret in this manner what ,wordsworth says1 will enable us to enter into perfect sympathy with all that grandest of his poems4 ,i do not say this is what he meant2 but ,i think it includes what he meant by being greater and wider than what he meant4 ,nor am ,i guilty of presumption in saying so1 for surely the idea that we are born of ,god is a greater idea than that we have lived with him a life before this life4 ,but ,wordsworth is not the first among our religious poets to give us at least what is valuable in the notion4 ,i came upon a volume amongst my friend ,shepherd's books1 with which ,i had made no acquaintance before--,henry ,vaughan's poems4 ,i brought it with me1 for it has finer lines1 ,i almost think1 than any in ,george ,herbert1 though not so fine poems by any means as his best4 ,when we go into the house ,i will read one of them to you4 ,thank you1 said ,turner4 ,i wish ,i could have such talk once a week4 ,the shades of the prison-house1 you know1 ,mr4 ,walton1 are always trying to close about us1 and shut out the vision of the glories we have come from1 as ,wordsworth says4 ,a man1 ,i answered1 who ministers to the miserable necessities of his fellows has even more need than another to believe in the light and the gladness--else a poor ,job's comforter will he be4 ,i don't want to be treated like a musical snuff-box4 ,the doctor laughed4 ,no man can prove1 he said1 that there is not a being inside the snuff-box1 existing in virtue of the harmony of its parts1 comfortable when they go well1 sick when they go badly1 and dying when it is dismembered1 or even when it stops4 ,no1 ,i answered4 ,no man can prove it4 ,but no man can convince a human being of it4 ,and just as little can anyone convince me that my conscience1 making me do sometimes what ,i don't like1 comes from a harmonious action of the particles of my brain4 ,but it is time we went in1 for by the law of things in general1 ,i being ready for my dinner1 my dinner ought to be ready for me4 ,a law with more exceptions than instances1 ,i fear1 said ,turner4 ,i doubt that1 ,i answered4 ,the readiness is everything1 and that we constantly blunder in4 ,but we had better see whether we are really ready for it1 by trying whether it is ready for us4 ,connie went to bed early1 as indeed we all did1 and she was rather better than worse the next morning4 ,my wife1 for the first time for many nights1 said nothing about the crying of the sea4 ,the following day ,turner and ,i set out to explore the neighbourhood4 ,the rest remained quietly at home4 ,it was1 as ,i have said1 a high bare country4 ,the fields lay side by side1 parted from each other chiefly1 as so often in ,scotland1 by stone walls2 and these stones being of a laminated nature1 the walls were not unfrequently built by laying thin plates on their edges1 which gave a neatness to them not found in other parts of the country as far as ,i am aware4 ,in the middle of the fields came here and there patches of yet unreclaimed moorland4 ,now in a region like this1 beauty must be looked for below the surface4 ,there is a probability of finding hollows of repose1 sunken spots of loveliness1 hidden away altogether from the general aspect of sternness1 or perhaps sterility1 that meets the eye in glancing over the outspread landscape2 just as in the natures of stern men you may expect to find1 if opportunity should be afforded you1 sunny spots of tender verdure1 kept ever green by that very sternness which is turned towards the common gaze--thus existent because they are below the surface1 and not laid bare to the sweep of the cold winds that roam the world4 ,how often have not men started with amaze at the discovery of some feminine sweetness1 some grace of protection in the man whom they had judged cold and hard and rugged1 inaccessible to the more genial influences of humanity6 ,it may be that such men are only fighting against the wind1 and keep their hearts open to the sun4 ,i knew this2 and when ,turner and ,i set out that morning to explore1 ,i expected to light upon some instance of it--some mine or other in which nature had hidden away rare jewels2 but ,i was not prepared to find such as ,i did find4 ,with our hearts full of a glad secret we returned home1 but we said nothing about it1 in order that ,ethelwyn and ,wynnie might enjoy the discovery even as we had enjoyed it4 ,there was another grand fact with regard to the neighbourhood about which we judged it better to be silent for a few days1 that the inland influences might be free to work4 ,we were considerably nearer the ocean than my wife and daughters supposed1 for we had made a great round in order to arrive from the land-side4 ,we were1 however1 out of the sound of its waves1 which broke all along the shore1 in this part1 at the foot of tremendous cliffs4 ,what cliffs they were we shall soon find4 ,,chapter ,,viii4 ,,the ,,keeve4 ,now1 my dear6 now1 ,wynnie6 ,i said1 after prayers the next morning1 you must come out for a walk as soon as ever you can get your bonnets on4 ,but we can't leave ,connie1 papa1 objected ,wynnie4 ,o1 yes1 you can1 quite well4 ,there's nursie to look after her4 ,what do you say1 ,connie8 ,for1 for some time now1 ,connie had been able to get up so early1 that it was no unusual thing to have prayers in her room4 ,i am entirely independent of help from my family1 returned ,connie grandiloquently4 ,i am a woman of independent means1 she added4 ,if you say another word1 ,i will rise and leave the room4 ,and she made a movement as if she would actually do as she had said4 ,seized with an involuntary terror1 ,i rushed towards her1 and the impertinent girl burst out laughing in my face--threw herself back on her pillows1 and laughed delightedly4 ,take care1 papa1 she said4 ,i carry a terrible club for rebellious people4 ,then1 her mood changing1 she added1 as if to suppress the tears gathering in her eyes1 ,i am the queen--of luxury and self-will--and ,i won't have anybody come near me till dinner-time4 ,i mean to enjoy myself4 ,so the matter was settled1 and we went out for our walk4 ,ethelwyn was not such a good walker as she had been2 but even if she had retained the strength of her youth1 we should not have got on much the better for it--so often did she and ,wynnie stop to grub ferns out of the chinks and roots of the stone-walls4 ,now1 ,i admire ferns as much as anybody--that is1 not1 ,i fear1 so much as my wife and daughter1 but quite enough notwithstanding--but ,i do not quite enjoy being pulled up like a fern at every turn4 ,now1 my dear1 what is the use of stopping to torture that harmless vegetable8 ,i say1 but say in vain4 ,it is much more beautiful where it is than it will be anywhere where you can put it4 ,besides1 you know they never come to anything with you4 ,they always die4 ,thereupon my wife reminds me of this fern and that fern1 gathered in such and such places1 and now in such and such corners of the garden or the greenhouse1 or under glass-shades in this or that room1 of the very existence of which ,i am ignorant1 whether from original inattention1 or merely from forgetfulness1 ,i do not know4 ,certainly1 out of their own place ,i do not care much for them4 ,at length1 partly by the inducement ,i held out to them of a much greater variety of ferns where we were bound1 ,i succeeded in getting them over the two miles in little more than two hours4 ,after passing from the lanes into the fields1 our way led downwards till we reached a very steep large slope1 with a delightful southern exposure1 and covered with the sweetest down-grasses4 ,it was just the place to lie in1 as on the edge of the earth1 and look abroad upon the universe of air and floating worlds4 ,let us have a rest here1 ,ethel1 ,i said4 ,i am sure this is much more delightful than uprooting ferns4 ,what an awful thing to think that here we are on this great round tumbling ball of a world1 held by the feet1 and lifting up the head into infinite space--without choice or wish of our own--compelled to think and to be1 whether we will or not6 ,just ,god must know it to be very good1 or he would not have taken it in his hands to make individual lives without a possible will of theirs4 ,he must be our ,father1 or we are wretched creatures--the slaves of a fatal necessity6 ,did it ever strike you1 ,turner1 that each one of us stands on the apex of the world8 ,with a sphere1 you know1 it must be so4 ,and thus is typified1 as it seems to me1 that each one of us must look up for himself to find ,god1 and then look abroad to find his fellows4 ,i think ,i know what you mean1 was all ,turner's reply4 ,no doubt1 ,i resumed1 the apprehension of this truth has1 in otherwise ill-ordered minds1 given rise to all sorts of fierce and grotesque fanaticism4 ,but the minds which have thus conceived the truth1 would have been immeasurably worse without it2 nay1 this truth affords at last the only possible door out of the miseries of their own chaos1 whether inherited or the result of their own misconduct4 ,what's that in the grass8 cried ,wynnie1 in a tone of alarm4 ,i looked where she indicated1 and saw a slow-worm1 or blind-worm1 lying basking in the sun4 ,i rose and went towards it4 ,here's your stick1 said ,turner4 ,what for8 ,i asked4 ,why should ,i kill it8 ,it is perfectly harmless1 and1 to my mind1 beautiful4 ,i took it in my hands1 and brought it to my wife4 ,she gave an involuntary shudder as it came near her4 ,i assure you it is harmless1 ,i said1 though it has a forked tongue4 ,and ,i opened its mouth as ,i spoke4 ,i do not think the serpent form is essentially ugly4 ,it makes me feel ugly1 said ,wynnie4 ,i allow ,i do not quite understand the mystery of it1 ,i said4 ,but you never saw lovelier ornamentation than these silvery scales1 with all the neatness of what you ladies call a set pattern1 and none of the stiffness1 for there are not two of them the same in form4 ,and you never saw lovelier curves than this little patient creature1 which does not even try to get away from me1 makes with the queer long thin body of him4 ,i wonder how it can look after its tail1 it is so far off1 said ,wynnie4 ,it does though--better than you ladies look after your long dresses4 ,i wonder whether it is descended from creatures that once had feet1 and did not make a good use of them4 ,perhaps they had wings even1 and would not use them at all1 and so lost them4 ,its ancestors may have had poison-fangs2 it is innocent enough4 ,but it is a terrible thing to be all feet1 is it not8 ,there is an awful significance in the condemnation of the serpent--',on thy belly shalt thou go1 and eat dust4' ,but it is better to talk of beautiful things4 ,my soul at least has dropped from its world apex4 ,let us go on4 ,come1 wife4 ,come1 ,turner4 ,they did not seem willing to rise4 ,but the glen drew me4 ,i rose1 and my wife followed my example with the help of my hand4 ,she returned to the subject1 however1 as we descended the slope4 ,is it possible that in the course of ever so many ages wings and feet should be both lost8 she said4 ,the most presumptuous thing in the world is to pronounce on the possible and the impossible4 ,i do not know what is possible and what is impossible4 ,i can only tell a little of what is true and what is untrue4 ,but ,i do say this1 that between the condition of many decent members of society and that for the sake of which ,god made them1 there is a gulf quite as vast as that between a serpent and a bird4 ,i get peeps now and then into the condition of my own heart1 which1 for the moment1 make it seem impossible that ,i should ever rise into a true state of nature--that is1 into the simplicity of ,god's will concerning me4 ,the only hope for ourselves and for others lies in him--in the power the creating spirit has over the spirits he has made4 ,by this time the descent on the grass was getting too steep and slippery to admit of our continuing to advance in that direction4 ,we turned1 therefore1 down the valley in the direction of the sea4 ,it was but a narrow cleft1 and narrowed much towards a deeper cleft1 in which we now saw the tops of trees1 and from which we heard the rush of water4 ,nor had we gone far in this direction before we came upon a gate in a stone wall1 which led into what seemed a neglected garden4 ,we entered1 and found a path turning and winding1 among small trees1 and luxuriant ferns1 and great stones1 and fragments of ruins down towards the bottom of the chasm4 ,the noise of falling water increased as we went on1 and at length1 after some scrambling and several sharp turns1 we found ourselves with a nearly precipitous wall on each side1 clothed with shrubs and ivy1 and creeping things of the vegetable world4 ,up this cleft there was no advance4 ,the head of it was a precipice down which shot the stream from the vale above1 pouring out of a deep slit it had itself cut in the rock as with a knife4 ,halfway down1 it tumbled into a great basin of hollowed stone1 and flowing from a chasm in its side1 which left part of the lip of the basin standing like the arch of a vanished bridge1 it fell into a black pool below1 whence it crept as if half-stunned or weary down the gentle decline of the ravine4 ,it was a perfect little picture4 ,i1 for my part1 had never seen such a picturesque fall4 ,it was a little gem of nature1 complete in effect4 ,the ladies were full of pleasure4 ,wynnie1 forgetting her usual reserve1 broke out in frantic exclamations of delight4 ,we stood for a while regarding the ceaseless pour of the water down the precipice1 here shot slanting in a little trough of the rock1 full of force and purpose1 here falling in great curls of green and gray1 with an expression of absolute helplessness and conscious perdition1 as if sheer to the centre1 but rejoicing the next moment to find itself brought up boiling and bubbling in the basin1 to issue in the gathered hope of experience4 ,then we turned down the stream a little way1 crossed it by a plank1 and stood again to regard it from the opposite side4 ,small as the whole affair was--not more than about a hundred and fifty feet in height--it was so full of variety that ,i saw it was all my memory could do1 if it carried away anything like a correct picture of its aspect4 ,i was contemplating it fixedly1 when a little stifled cry from ,wynnie made me start and look round4 ,her face was flushed1 yet she was trying to look unconcerned4 ,i thought we were quite alone1 papa1 she said2 but ,i see a gentleman sketching4 ,i looked whither she indicated4 ,a little way down1 the bed of the ravine widened considerably1 and was no doubt filled with water in rainy weather4 ,now it was swampy--full of reeds and willow bushes4 ,but on the opposite side of the stream1 with a little canal from it going all around it1 lay a great flat rectangular stone1 not more than a foot above the level of the water1 and upon a camp-stool in the centre of this stone sat a gentleman sketching4 ,i had no doubt that ,wynnie had recognised him at once4 ,and ,i was annoyed1 and indeed angry1 to think that ,mr4 ,percivale had followed us here4 ,but while ,i regarded him1 he looked up1 rose very quietly1 and1 with his pencil in his hand1 came towards us4 ,with no nearer approach to familiarity than a bow1 and no expression of either much pleasure or any surprise1 he said-- ,i have seen your party for some time1 ,mr4 ,walton--since you crossed the stream2 but ,i would not break in upon your enjoyment with the surprise which my presence here must cause you4 ,i suppose ,i answered with a bow of some sort2 for ,i could not say with truth that ,i was glad to see him4 ,he resumed1 doubtless penetrating my suspicion-- ,i have been here almost a week4 ,i certainly had no expectation of the pleasure of seeing you4 ,this he said lightly1 though no doubt with the object of clearing himself4 ,and ,i was1 if not reassured1 yet disarmed1 by his statement2 for ,i could not believe1 from what ,i knew of him1 that he would be guilty of such a white lie as many a gentleman would have thought justifiable on the occasion4 ,still1 ,i suppose he found me a little stiff1 for presently he said-- ,if you will excuse me1 ,i will return to my work4 ,then ,i felt as if ,i must say something1 for ,i had shown him no courtesy during the interview4 ,it must be a great pleasure to carry away such talismans with you--capable of bringing the place back to your mental vision at any moment4 ,to tell the truth1 he answered1 ,i am a little ashamed of being found sketching here4 ,such bits of scenery are not of my favourite studies4 ,but it is a change4 ,it is very beautiful here1 ,i said1 in a tone of contravention4 ,it is very pretty1 he answered--very lovely1 if you will--not very beautiful1 ,i think4 ,i would keep that word for things of larger regard4 ,beauty requires width1 and here is none4 ,i had almost said this place was fanciful--the work of imagination in her play-hours1 not in her large serious moods4 ,it affects me like the face of a woman only pretty1 about which boys and guardsmen will rave--to me not very interesting1 save for its single lines4 ,why1 then1 do you sketch the place8 ,a very fair question1 he returned1 with a smile4 ,just because it is soothing from the very absence of beauty4 ,i would far rather1 however1 if ,i were only following my taste1 take the barest bit of the moor above1 with a streak of the cold sky over it4 ,that gives room4 ,you would like to put a skylark in it1 wouldn't you8 ,that ,i would if ,i knew how4 ,i see you know what ,i mean4 ,but the mere romantic ,i never had much taste for2 though if you saw the kind of pictures ,i try to paint1 you would not wonder that ,i take sketches of places like this1 while in my heart of hearts ,i do not care much for them4 ,they are so different1 and just therefore they are good for me4 ,i am not working now2 ,i am only playing4 ,with a view to working better afterwards1 ,i have no doubt1 ,i answered4 ,you are right there1 ,i hope1 was his quiet reply1 as he turned and walked back to the island4 ,he had not made a step towards joining us4 ,he had only taken his hat off to the ladies4 ,he was gaining ground upon me rapidly4 ,have you quarrelled with our new friend1 ,harry8 said my wife1 as ,i came up to her4 ,she was sitting on a stone4 ,turner and ,wynnie were farther off towards the foot of the fall4 ,not in the least1 ,i answered1 slightly outraged--,i did not at first know why--by the question4 ,he is only gone to his work1 which is a duty belonging both to the first and second tables of the law4 ,i hope you have asked him to come home to our early dinner1 then1 she rejoined4 ,i have not4 ,that remains for you to do4 ,come1 ,i will take you to him4 ,ethelwyn rose at once1 put her hand in mine1 and with a little help soon reached the table-rock4 ,when ,percivale saw that she was really on a visit to him on his island-perch1 he rose1 and when she came near enough1 held out his hand4 ,it was but a step1 and she was beside him in a moment4 ,after the usual greetings1 which on her part1 although very quiet1 like every motion and word of hers1 were yet indubitably cordial and kind1 she said1 ,when you get back to ,london1 ,mr4 ,percivale1 might ,i ask you to allow some friends of mine to call at your studio1 and see your paintings8 ,with all my heart1 answered ,percivale4 ,i must warn you1 however1 that ,i have not much they will care to see4 ,they will perhaps go away less happy than they entered4 ,not many people care to see my pictures twice4 ,i would not send you anyone ,i thought unworthy of the honour1 answered my wife4 ,percivale bowed--one of his stately1 old-world bows1 which ,i greatly liked4 ,any friend of yours--that is guarantee sufficient1 he answered4 ,there was this peculiarity about any compliment that ,percivale paid1 that you had not a doubt of its being genuine4 ,will you come and take an early dinner with us8 said my wife4 ,my invalid daughter will be very pleased to see you4 ,i will with pleasure1 he answered1 but in a tone of some hesitation1 as he glanced from ,ethelwyn to me4 ,my wife speaks for us all1 ,i said4 ,it will give us all pleasure4 ,i am only afraid it will break in upon your morning's work1 remarked ,ethelwyn4 ,o1 that is not of the least consequence1 he rejoined4 ,in fact1 as ,i have just been saying to ,mr4 ,walton1 ,i am not working at all at present4 ,this is pure recreation4 ,as he spoke he turned towards his easel1 and began hastily to bundle up his things4 ,we're not quite ready to go yet1 said my wife1 loath to leave the lovely spot4 ,what a curious flat stone this is6 she added4 ,it is1 said ,percivale4 ,the man to whom the place belongs1 a worthy yeoman of the old school1 says that this wider part of the channel must have been the fish-pond1 and that the portly monks stood on this stone and fished in the pond4 ,then was there a monastery here8 ,i asked4 ,certainly4 ,the ruins of the chapel1 one of the smallest1 are on the top1 just above the fall--rather a fearful place to look down from4 ,i wonder you did not observe them as you came4 ,they say it had a silver bell in the days of its glory1 which now lies in a deep hole under the basin1 half-way between the top and bottom of the fall4 ,but the old man says that nothing will make him look1 or let anyone else lift the huge stone2 for he is much better pleased to believe that it may be there1 than he would be to know it was not there2 for certainly1 if it were found1 it would not be left there long4 ,as he spoke ,percivale had continued packing his gear4 ,he now led our party up to the chapel1 and thence down a few yards to the edge of the chasm1 where the water fell headlong4 ,i turned away with that fear of high places which is one of my many weaknesses2 and when ,i turned again towards the spot1 there was ,wynnie on the very edge1 looking over into the flash and tumult of the water below1 but with a nervous grasp of the hand of ,percivale1 who stood a little farther back4 ,in going home1 the painter led us by an easier way out of the valley1 left his little easel and other things at a cottage1 and then walked on in front between my wife and daughter1 while ,turner and ,i followed4 ,he seemed quite at his ease with them1 and plenty of talk and laughter rose on the way4 ,i1 however1 was chiefly occupied with finding out ,turner's impression of ,connie's condition4 ,she is certainly better1 he said4 ,i wonder you do not see it as plainly as ,i do4 ,the pain is nearly gone from her spine1 and she can move herself a good deal more1 ,i am certain1 than she could when she left4 ,she asked me yesterday if she might not turn upon one side4 ',do you think you could8' ,i asked4--',i think so1' she answered4 ',at any rate1 ,i have often a great inclination to try2 only papa said ,i had better wait till you came4' ,i do think she might be allowed a little more change of posture now4 ,then you have really some hope of her final recovery8 ,i have hope most certainly4 ,but what is hope in me1 you must not allow to become certainty in you4 ,i am nearly sure1 though1 that she can never be other than an invalid2 that is1 if ,i am to judge by what ,i know of such cases4 ,i am thankful for the hope1 ,i answered4 ,you need not be afraid of my turning upon you1 should the hope never pass into sight4 ,i should do so only if ,i found that you had been treating me irrationally--inspiring me with hope which you knew to be false4 ,the element of uncertainty is essential to hope1 and for all true hope1 even as hope1 man has to be unspeakably thankful4 ,,chapter ,,ix4 ,,the ,,walk ,,to ,,church4 ,i was glad to be able to arrange with a young clergyman who was on a visit to ,kilkhaven1 that he should take my duty for me the next ,sunday1 for that was the only one ,turner could spend with us4 ,he and ,i and ,wynnie walked together two miles to church4 ,it was a lovely morning1 with just a tint of autumn in the air4 ,but even that tint1 though all else was of the summer1 brought a shadow1 ,i could see1 on ,wynnie's face4 ,you said you would show me a poem of--,vaughan1 ,i think you said1 was the name of the writer4 ,i am too ignorant of our older literature1 said ,turner4 ,i have only just made acquaintance with him1 ,i answered4 ,but ,i think ,i can repeat the poem4 ,you shall judge whether it is not like ,wordsworth's ,ode4 ',happy those early days1 when ,i ,shined in my angel infancy2 ,before ,i understood the place ,appointed for my second race1 ,or taught my soul to fancy ought ,but a white1 celestial thought2 ,when yet ,i had not walked above ,a mile or two from my first love1 ,and looking back1 at that short space1 ,could see a glimpse of his bright face2 ,when on some gilded cloud or flower ,my gazing soul would dwell an hour1 ,and in those weaker glories spy ,some shadows of eternity2 ,before ,i taught my tongue to wound ,my conscience with a sinful sound1 ,but felt through all this fleshly dress ,bright shoots of everlastingness4 ,o how ,i long to travel back----' ,but here ,i broke down1 for ,i could not remember the rest with even approximate accuracy4 ,when did this ,vaughan live8 asked ,turner4 ,he was born1 ,i find1 in #afba--;five years1 that is1 after ,shakspere's death1 and when ,milton was about thirteen years old4 ,he lived to the age of seventy-three1 but seems to have been little known4 ,in politics he was on the ,cavalier side4 ,by the way1 he was a medical man1 like you1 ,turner--an ,m4,d4 ,we'll have a glance at the little book when we go back4 ,don't let me forget to show it you4 ,a good many of your profession have distinguished themselves in literature1 and as profound believers too4 ,i should have thought the profession had been chiefly remarkable for such as believe only in the evidence of the senses4 ,as if having searched into the innermost recesses of the body1 and not having found a soul1 they considered themselves justified in declaring there was none4 ,just so4 ,well1 that is true of the commonplace amongst them1 ,i do believe4 ,you will find the exceptions have been men of fine minds and characters--not such as he of whom ,chaucer says1 ',his study was but little on the ,bible2' for if you look at the rest of the description of the man1 you will find that he was in alliance with his apothecary for their mutual advantage1 that he was a money-loving man1 and that some of ,chaucer's keenest irony is spent on him in an off-hand1 quiet manner4 ,compare the tone in which he writes of the doctor of physic1 with the profound reverence wherewith he bows himself before the poor country-parson4 ,here ,wynnie spoke1 though with some tremor in her voice4 ,i never know1 papa1 what people mean by talking about childhood in that way4 ,i never seem to have been a bit younger and more innocent than ,i am4 ,don't you remember a time1 ,wynnie1 when the things about you--the sky and the earth1 say--seemed to you much grander than they seem now8 ,you are old enough to have lost something4 ,she thought for a little while before she answered4 ,my dreams were1 ,i know4 ,i cannot say so of anything else4 ,i in my turn had to be silent1 for ,i did not see the true answer1 though ,i was sure there was one somewhere1 if ,i could only find it4 ,all ,i could reply1 however1 even after ,i had meditated a good while1 was--and perhaps1 after all1 it was the best thing ,i could have said3 ,then you must make a good use of your dreams1 my child4 ,why1 papa8 ,because they are the only memorials of childhood you have left4 ,how am ,i to make a good use of them8 ,i don't know what to do with my silly old dreams4 ,but she gave a sigh as she spoke that testified her silly old dreams had a charm for her still4 ,if your dreams1 my child1 have ever testified to you of a condition of things beyond that which you see around you1 if they have been to you the hints of a wonder and glory beyond what visits you now1 you must not call them silly1 for they are just what the scents of ,paradise borne on the air were to ,adam and ,eve as they delved and spun1 reminding them that they must aspire yet again through labour into that childhood of obedience which is the only paradise of humanity--into that oneness with the will of the ,father1 which our race1 our individual selves1 need just as much as if we had personally fallen with ,adam1 and from which we fall every time we are disobedient to the voice of the ,father within our souls--to the conscience which is his making and his witness4 ,if you have had no childhood1 my ,wynnie1 yet permit your old father to say that everything ,i see in you indicates more strongly in you than in most people that it is this childhood after which you are blindly longing1 without which you find that life is hardly to be endured4 ,thank ,god for your dreams1 my child4 ,in him you will find that the essence of those dreams is fulfilled4 ,we are saved by hope1 ,turner4 ,never man hoped too much1 or repented that he had hoped4 ,the plague is that we don't hope in ,god half enough4 ,the very fact that hope is strength1 and strength the outcome1 the body of life1 shows that hope is at one with life1 with the very essence of what says ',i am'--yea1 of what doubts and says ',am ,i8' and therefore is reasonable to creatures who cannot even doubt save in that they live4 ,by this time1 for ,i have1 of course1 only given the outlines1 or rather salient points1 of our conversation1 we had reached the church1 where1 if ,i found the sermon neither healing nor inspiring1 ,i found the prayers full of hope and consolation4 ,they at least are safe beyond human caprice1 conceit1 or incapacity4 ,upon them1 too1 the man who is distressed at the thought of how little of the needful food he had been able to provide for his people1 may fall back for comfort1 in the thought that there at least was what ought to have done them good1 what it was well worth their while to go to church for4 ,but ,i did think they were too long for any individual ,christian soul1 to sympathise with from beginning to end1 that is1 to respond to1 like organ-tube to the fingered key1 in every touch of the utterance of the general ,christian soul4 ,for my reader must remember that it is one thing to read prayers and another to respond2 and that ,i had had very few opportunities of being in the position of the latter duty4 ,i had had suspicions before1 and now they were confirmed--that the present crowding of services was most inexpedient4 ,and as ,i pondered on the matter1 instead of trying to go on praying after ,i had already uttered my soul1 which is but a heathenish attempt after much speaking1 ,i thought how our ,lord had given us such a short prayer to pray1 and ,i began to wonder when or how the services came to be so heaped the one on the back of the other as they now were4 ,no doubt many people defended them2 no doubt many people could sit them out2 but how many people could pray from beginning to end of them ,i ,on this point we had some talk as we went home4 ,wynnie was opposed to any change of the present use on the ground that we should only have the longer sermons4 ,still1 ,i said1 ,i do not think even that so great an evil4 ,a sensitive conscience will not reproach itself so much for not listening to the whole of a sermon1 as for kneeling in prayer and not praying4 ,i think myself1 however1 that after the prayers are over1 everyone should be at liberty to go out and leave the sermon unheard1 if he pleases4 ,i think the result would be in the end a good one both for parson and people4 ,it would break through the deadness of this custom1 this use and wont4 ,many a young mind is turned for life against the influences of church-going--one of the most sacred influences when pure1 that is1 un-mingled with non-essentials--just by the feeling that he must do so and so1 that he must go through a certain round of duty4 ,it is a willing service that the ,lord wants2 no forced devotions are either acceptable to him1 or other than injurious to the worshipper1 if such he can be called4 ,after an early dinner1 ,i said to ,turner--,come out with me1 and we will read that poem of ,vaughan's in which ,i broke down today4 ,o1 papa6 said ,connie1 in a tone of injury1 from the sofa4 ,what is it1 my dear8 ,i asked4 ,wouldn't it be as good for us as for ,mr4 ,turner8 ,quite1 my dear4 ,well1 ,i will keep it for the evening1 and meantime ,mr4 ,turner and ,i will go and see if we can find out anything about the change in the church-service4 ,for ,i had thrown into my bag as ,i left the rectory a copy of ,the ,clergyman's ,vade ,mecum--a treatise occupied with the externals of the churchman's relations--in which ,i soon came upon the following passage3 ,so then it appears that the common practice of reading all three together1 is an innovation1 and if an ancient or infirm clergyman do read them at two or three several times1 he is more strictly conformable2 however1 this is much better than to omit any part of the liturgy1 or to read all three offices into one1 as is now commonly done1 without any pause or distinction4 ,on the part of the clergyman1 you see1 ,turner1 ,i said1 when ,i had finished reading the whole passage to him4 ,there is no care taken of the delicate women of the congregation1 but only of the ancient or infirm clergyman4 ,and the logic1 to say the least1 is rather queer3 is it only in virtue of his antiquity and infirmity that he is to be upheld in being more strictly conformable8 ,the writer's honesty has its heels trodden upon by the fear of giving offence4 ,nevertheless there should perhaps be a certain slowness to admit change1 even back to a more ancient form4 ,i don't know that ,i can quite agree with you there1 said ,turner4 ,if the form is better1 no one should hesitate to advocate the change4 ,if it is worse1 then slowness is not sufficient--utter obstinacy is the right condition4 ,you are right1 ,turner4 ,for the right must be the rule1 and where the right is beyond our understanding or our reach1 then the better1 as indeed not only right compared with the other1 but the sole ascent towards the right4 ,in the evening ,i took ,henry ,vaughan's poems into the common sitting-room1 and to ,connie's great delight read the whole of the lovely1 though unequal little poem1 called ,the ,retreat1 in recalling which ,i had failed in the morning4 ,she was especially delighted with the white celestial thought1 and the bright shoots of everlastingness4 ,then ,i gave a few lines from another yet more unequal poem1 worthy in themselves of the best of the other4 ,i quote the first strophe entire3 ,,childhood4 ,i cannot reach it2 and my striving eye ,dazzles at it1 as at eternity4 ,were now that chronicle alive1 ,those white designs which children drive1 ,and the thoughts of each harmless hour1 ,with their content too in my power1 ,quickly would ,i make my path even1 ,and by mere playing go to heaven4 99 99 99 99 99 ,and yet the practice worldlings call ,business and weighty action all1 ,checking the poor child for his play1 ,but gravely cast themselves away4 99 99 99 99 99 ,an age of mysteries6 which he ,must live twice that would ,god's face see2 ,which angels guard1 and with it play1 ,angels6 which foul men drive away4 ,how do ,i study now1 and scan ,thee more than ere ,i studied man1 ,and only see through a long night ,thy edges and thy bordering light ,i ,o for thy centre and midday6 ,for sure that is the narrow way6 ,for of such is the kingdom of heaven4 said my wife softly1 as ,i closed the book4 ,may ,i have the book1 papa8 said ,connie1 holding out her thin white cloud of a hand to take it4 ,certainly1 my child4 ,and if ,wynnie would read it with you1 she will feel more of the truth of what ,mr4 ,percivale was saying to her about finish4 ,here are the finest1 grandest thoughts1 set forth sometimes with such carelessness1 at least such lack of neatness1 that1 instead of their falling on the mind with all their power of loveliness1 they are like a beautiful face disfigured with patches1 and1 what is worse1 they put the mind out of the right1 quiet1 unquestioning1 open mood1 which is the only fit one for the reception of such true things as are embodied in the poems4 ,but they are too beautiful after all to be more than a little spoiled by such a lack of the finish with which ,art ends off all her labours4 ,a gentleman1 however1 thinks it of no little importance to have his nails nice as well as his face and his shirt4 ,,chapter ,x4 ,,the ,,old ,,castle4 ,the place ,turner had chosen suited us all so well1 that after attending to my duties on the two following ,sundays at ,kilkhaven1 ,i returned on the ,monday or ,tuesday to the farmhouse4 ,but ,turner left us in the middle of the second week1 for he could not be longer absent from his charge at home1 and we missed him much4 ,it was some days before ,connie was quite as cheerful again as usual4 ,i do not mean that she was in the least gloomy--that she never was2 she was only a little less merry4 ,but whether it was that ,turner had opened our eyes1 or that she had visibly improved since he allowed her to make a little change in her posture--certainly she appeared to us to have made considerable progress1 and every now and then we were discovering some little proof of the fact4 ,one evening1 while we were still at the farm1 she startled us by calling out suddenly1-- ,papa1 papa6 ,i moved my big toe6 ,i did indeed4 ,we were all about her in a moment4 ,but ,i saw that she was excited1 and fearing a reaction ,i sought to calm her4 ,but1 my dear1 ,i said1 as quietly as ,i could1 you are probably still aware that you are possessed of two big toes3 which of them are we to congratulate on this first stride in the march of improvement8 ,she broke out in the merriest laugh4 ,a pause followed in which her face wore a puzzled expression4 ,then she said all at once1 ,papa1 it is very odd1 but ,i can't tell which of them1 and burst into tears4 ,i was afraid that ,i had done more harm than good4 ,it is not of the slightest consequence1 my child1 ,i said4 ,you have had so little communication with the twins of late1 that it is no wonder you should not be able to tell the one from the other4 ,she smiled again through her sobs1 but was silent1 with shining face1 for the rest of the evening4 ,our hopes took a fresh start1 but we heard no more from her of her power over her big toe4 ,as often as ,i inquired she said she was afraid she had made a mistake1 for she had not had another hint of its existence4 ,still ,i thought it could not have been a fancy1 and ,i would cleave to my belief in the good sign4 ,percivale called to see us several times1 but always appeared anxious not to intrude more of his society upon us than might be agreeable4 ,he grew in my regard1 however2 and at length ,i asked him if he would assist me in another surprise which ,i meditated for my companions1 and this time for ,connie as well1 and which ,i hoped would prevent the painful influences of the sight of the sea from returning upon them when they went back to ,kilkhaven3 they must see the sea from a quite different shore first4 ,in a word ,i would take them to ,tintagel1 of the near position of which they were not aware1 although in some of our walks we had seen the ocean in the distance4 ,an early day was fixed for carrying out our project1 and ,i proceeded to get everything ready4 ,the only difficulty was to find a carriage in the neighbourhood suitable for receiving ,connie's litter4 ,in this1 however1 ,i at length succeeded1 and on the morning of a glorious day of blue and gold1 we set out for the little village of ,trevenna1 now far better known than at the time of which ,i write4 ,connie had been out every day since she came1 now in one part of the fields1 now in another1 enjoying the expanse of earth and sky1 but she had had no drive1 and consequently had seen no variety of scenery4 ,therefore1 believing she was now thoroughly able to bear it1 ,i quite reckoned of the good she would get from the inevitable excitement4 ,we resolved1 however1 after finding how much she enjoyed the few miles' drive1 that we would not demand more1 of her strength that day1 and therefore put up at the little inn1 where1 after ordering dinner1 ,percivale and ,i left the ladies1 and sallied forth to reconnoitre4 ,we walked through the village and down the valley beyond1 sloping steeply between hills towards the sea1 the opening closed at the end by the blue of the ocean below and the more ethereal blue of the sky above4 ,but when we reached the mouth of the valley we found that we were not yet on the shore1 for a precipice lay between us and the little beach below4 ,on the left a great peninsula of rock stood out into the sea1 upon which rose the ruins of the keep of ,tintagel1 while behind on the mainland stood the ruins of the castle itself1 connected with the other only by a narrow isthmus4 ,we had read that this peninsula had once been an island1 and that the two parts of the castle were formerly connected by a drawbridge4 ,looking up at the great gap which now divided the two portions1 it seemed at first impossible to believe that they had ever been thus united2 but a little reflection cleared up the mystery4 ,the fact was that the isthmus1 of half the height of the two parts connected by it1 had been formed entirely by the fall of portions of the rock and soil on each side into the narrow dividing space1 through which the waters of the ,atlantic had been wont to sweep4 ,and now the fragments of walls stood on the very verge of the precipice1 and showed that large portions of the castle itself had fallen into the gulf between4 ,we turned to the left along the edge of the rock1 and so by a narrow path reached and crossed to the other side of the isthmus4 ,we then found that the path led to the foot of the rock1 formerly island1 of the keep1 and thence in a zigzag up the face of it to the top4 ,we followed it1 and after a great climb reached a door in a modern battlement4 ,entering1 we found ourselves amidst grass1 and ruins haggard with age4 ,we turned and surveyed the path by which we had come4 ,it was steep and somewhat difficult4 ,but the outlook was glorious4 ,it was indeed one of ,god's mounts of vision upon which we stood4 ,the thought1 ,o that ,connie could see this6 was swelling in my heart1 when ,percivale broke the silence--not with any remark on the glory around us1 but with the commonplace question-- ,you haven't got your man with you1 ,i think1 ,mr4 ,walton8 ,no1 ,i answered2 we thought it better to leave him to look after the boys4 ,he was silent for a few minutes1 while ,i gazed in delight4 ,don't you think1 he said1 it would be possible to bring ,miss ,constance up here8 ,i almost started at the idea1 and had not replied before he resumed3 ,it would be something for her to recur to with delight all the rest of her life4 ,it would indeed4 ,but it is impossible4 ,i do not think so--if you would allow me the honour to assist you4 ,i think we could do it perfectly between us4 ,i was again silent for a while4 ,looking down on the way we had come1 it seemed an almost dreadful undertaking4 ,percivale spoke again4 ,as we shall come here to-morrow1 we need not explore the place now4 ,shall we go down at once and observe the whole path1 with a view to the practicability of carrying her up8 ,there can be no objection to that1 ,i answered1 as a little hope1 and courage with it1 began to dawn in my heart4 ,but you must allow it does not look very practicable4 ,perhaps it would seem more so to you1 if you had come up with the idea in your head all the way1 as ,i did4 ,any path seems more difficult in looking back than at the time when the difficulties themselves have to be met and overcome4 ,yes1 but then you must remember that we have to take the way back whether we will or no1 if we once take the way forward4 ,true2 and now ,i will go down with the descent in my head as well as under my feet4 ,well1 there can be no harm in reconnoitring it at least4 ,let us go4 ,you know we can rest almost as often as we please1 said ,percivale1 and turned to lead the way4 ,it certainly was steep1 and required care even in our own descent2 but for a man who had climbed mountains1 as ,i had done in my youth1 it could hardly be called difficult even in middle age4 ,by the time we had got again into the valley road ,i was all but convinced of the practicability of the proposal4 ,i was a little vexed1 however1 ,i must confess1 that a stranger should have thought of giving such a pleasure to ,connie1 when the bare wish that she might have enjoyed it had alone arisen in my mind4 ,i comforted myself with the reflection that this was one of the ways in which we were to be weaned from the world and knit the faster to our fellows4 ,for even the middle-aged1 in the decay of their daring1 must look for the fresh thought and the fresh impulse to the youth which follows at their heels in the march of life4 ,their part is to will the relation and the obligation1 and so1 by love to and faith in the young1 keep themselves in the line along which the electric current flows1 till at length they too shall once more be young and daring in the strength of the ,lord4 ,a man must always seek to rise above his moods and feelings1 to let them move within him1 but not allow them to storm or gloom around him4 ,by the time we reached home we had agreed to make the attempt1 and to judge by the path to the foot of the rock1 which was difficult in parts1 whether we should be likely to succeed1 without danger1 in attempting the rest of the way and the following descent4 ,as soon as we had arrived at this conclusion1 ,i felt so happy in the prospect that ,i grew quite merry1 especially after we had further agreed that1 both for the sake of her nerves and for the sake of the lordly surprise1 we should bind ,connie's eyes so that she should see nothing till we had placed her in a certain position1 concerning the preferableness of which we were not of two minds4 ,what mischief have you two been about8 said my wife1 as we entered our room in the inn1 where the cloth was already laid for dinner4 ,you look just like two schoolboys that have been laying some plot1 and can hardly hold their tongues about it4 ,we have been enjoying our little walk amazingly1 ,i answered4 ,so much so1 that we mean to set out for another the moment dinner is over4 ,i hope you will take ,wynnie with you then4 ,or you1 my love1 ,i returned4 ,no2 ,i will stay with ,connie4 ,very well4 ,you1 and ,connie too1 shall go out to-morrow1 for we have found a place we want to take you to4 ,and1 indeed1 ,i believe it was our anticipation of the pleasure you and she would have in the view that made us so merry when you accused us of plotting mischief4 ,my wife replied only with a loving look1 and dinner appearing at this moment1 we sat down a happy party4 ,when that was over--and a very good dinner it was1 just what ,i like1 homely in material but admirable in cooking--,wynnie and ,percivale and ,i set out again4 ,for as ,percivale and ,i came back in the morning we had seen the church standing far aloft and aloof on the other side of the little valley1 and we wanted to go to it4 ,it was rather a steep climb1 and ,wynnie accepted ,percivale's offered arm4 ,i led the way1 therefore1 and left them to follow--not so far in the rear1 however1 but that ,i could take a share in the conversation4 ,it was some little time before any arose1 and it was ,wynnie who led the way into it4 ,what kind of things do you like best to paint1 ,mr4 ,percivale8 she asked4 ,he hesitated for several seconds1 which between a question and an answer look so long1 that most people would call them minutes4 ,i would rather you should see some of my pictures--,i should prefer that to answering your question1 he said1 at length4 ,but ,i have seen some of your pictures1 she returned4 ,pardon me4 ,indeed you have not1 ,miss ,walton4 ,at least ,i have seen some of your sketches and studies4 ,some of my sketches--none of my studies4 ,but you make use of your sketches for your pictures1 do you not8 ,never of such as you have seen4 ,they are only a slight antidote to my pictures4 ,i cannot understand you4 ,i do not wonder at that4 ,but ,i would rather1 ,i repeat1 say nothing about my pictures till you see some of them4 ,but how am ,i to have that pleasure1 then8 ,you go to ,london sometimes1 do you not8 ,very rarely4 ,more rarely still when the ,royal ,academy is open4 ,that does not matter much4 ,my pictures are seldom to be found there4 ,do you not care to send them there8 ,i send one1 at least1 every year4 ,but they are rarely accepted4 ,why8 ,this was a very improper question1 ,i thought2 but if ,wynnie had thought so she would not have put it4 ,he hesitated a little before he replied-- ,it is hardly for me to say why1 he answered2 but ,i cannot wonder much at it1 considering the subjects ,i choose4--,but ,i daresay1 he added1 in a lighter tone1 after all1 that has little to do with it1 and there is something about the things themselves that precludes a favourable judgment4 ,i avoid thinking about it4 ,a man ought to try to look at his own work as if it were none of his1 but not as with the eyes of other people4 ,that is an impossibility1 and the attempt a bewilderment4 ,it is with his own eyes he must look1 with his own judgment he must judge4 ,the only effort is to get it set far away enough from him to be able to use his own eyes and his own judgment upon it4 ,i think ,i see what you mean4 ,a man has but his own eyes and his own judgment4 ,to look with those of other people is but a fancy4 ,quite so4 ,you understand me quite4 ,he said no more in explanation of his rejection by the ,academy4 ,till we reached the church1 nothing more of significance passed between them4 ,what a waste1 bare churchyard that was6 ,it had two or three lych-gates1 but they had no roofs4 ,they were just small enclosures1 with the low stone tables1 to rest the living from the weight of the dead1 while the clergyman1 as the keeper of heaven's wardrobe1 came forth to receive the garment they restored--to be laid aside as having ended its work1 as having been worn done in the winds1 and rains1 and labours of the world4 ,not a tree stood in that churchyard4 ,hank grass was the sole covering of the soil heaved up with the dead beneath4 ,what blasts from the awful space of the sea must rush athwart the undefended garden6 ,the ancient church stood in the midst1 with its low1 strong1 square tower1 and its long1 narrow nave1 the ridge bowed with age1 like the back of a horse worn out in the service of man1 and its little homely chancel1 like a small cottage that had leaned up against its end for shelter from the western blasts4 ,it was locked1 and we could not enter4 ,but of all world-worn1 sad-looking churches1 that one--sad1 even in the sunset--was the dreariest ,i had ever beheld4 ,surely1 it needed the gospel of the resurrection fervently preached therein1 to keep it from sinking to the dust with dismay and weariness4 ,such a soul alone could keep it from vanishing utterly of dismal old age4 ,near it was one huge mound of grass-grown rubbish1 looking like the grave where some former church of the dead had been buried1 when it could stand erect no longer before the onsets of ,atlantic winds4 ,i walked round and round it1 gathering its architecture1 and peeping in at every window ,i could reach4 ,suddenly ,i was aware that ,i was alone4 ,returning to the other side1 ,i found that ,percivale was seated on the churchyard wall1 next the sea--it would have been less dismal had it stood immediately on the cliffs1 but they were at some little distance beyond bare downs and rough stone walls2 he was sketching the place1 and ,wynnie stood beside him1 looking over his shoulder4 ,i did not interrupt him1 but walked among the graves1 reading the poor memorials of the dead1 and wondering how many of the words of laudation that were inscribed on their tombs were spoken of them while they were yet alive4 ,yet1 surely1 in the lives of those to whom they applied the least1 there had been moments when the true nature1 the nature ,god had given them1 broke forth in faith and tenderness1 and would have justified the words inscribed on their gravestones6 ,i was yet wandering and reading1 and stumbling over the mounds1 when my companions joined me1 and1 without a word1 we walked out of the churchyard4 ,we were nearly home before one of us spoke4 ,that church is oppressive1 said ,percivale4 ,it looks like a great sepulchre1 a place built only for the dead--the church of the dead4 ,it is only that it partakes with the living1 ,i returned2 suffers with them the buffetings of life1 outlasts them1 but shows1 like the shield of the ,red-,cross ,knight1 the 'old dints of deep wounds4' ,still1 is it not a dreary place to choose for a church to stand in8 ,the church must stand everywhere4 ,there is no region into which it must not1 ought not to enter4 ,if it refuses any earthly spot1 it is shrinking from its calling4 ,here this one stands for the sea as for the land1 high-uplifted1 looking out over the waters as a sign of the haven from all storms1 the rest in ,god4 ,and down beneath in its storehouse lie the bodies of men--you saw the grave of some of them on the other side--flung ashore from the gulfing sea4 ,it may be a weakness1 but one would rather have the bones of his friend laid in the still ,sabbath of the churchyard earth1 than sweeping and swaying about as ,milton imagines the bones of his friend ,edward ,king1 in that wonderful ',lycidas4' ,then ,i told them the conversation ,i had had with the sexton at ,kilkhaven4 ,but1 ,i went on1 these fancies are only the ghostly mists that hang about the eastern hills before the sun rises4 ,we shall look down on all that with a smile by and by2 for the ,lord tells us that if we believe in him we shall never die4 ,by this time we were back once more at the inn4 ,we gave ,connie a description of what we had seen4 ,what a brave old church6 said ,connie4 ,the next day ,i awoke very early1 full of the anticipated attempt4 ,i got up at once1 found the weather most promising1 and proceeded first of all to have a look at ,connie's litter1 and see that it was quite sound4 ,satisfied of this1 ,i rejoiced in the contemplation of its lightness and strength4 ,after breakfast ,i went to ,connie's room1 and told her that ,mr4 ,percivale and ,i had devised a treat for her4 ,her face shone at once4 ,but we want to do it our own way4 ,of course1 papa1 she answered4 ,will you let us tie your eyes up8 ,yes2 and my ears and my hands too4 ,it would be no good tying my feet1 when ,i don't know one big toe from the other4 ,and she laughed merrily4 ,we'll try to keep up the talk all the way1 so that you sha'n't weary of the journey4 ,you're going to carry me somewhere with my eyes tied up4 ,o6 how jolly6 ,and then ,i shall see something all at once6 ,jolly6 jolly6--,getting tired6 she repeated4 ,even the wind on my face would be pleasure enough for half a day4 ,i sha'n't get tired so soon as you will--you dear1 kind papa6 ,i am afraid ,i shall be dreadfully heavy4 ,but ,i sha'n't jerk your arms much4 ,i will lie so still6 ,and you won't mind letting ,mr4 ,percivale help me to carry you8 ,no4 ,why should ,i1 if he doesn't mind it8 ,he looks strong enough2 and ,i am sure he is nice1 and won't think me heavier than ,i am4 ,very well1 then4 ,i will send mamma and ,wynnie to dress you at once2 and we shall set out as soon as you are ready4 ,she clapped her hands with delight1 then caught me round the neck and gave me one of my own kisses as she called the best she had1 and began to call as loud as she could on her mamma and ,wynnie to come and dress her4 ,it was indeed a glorious morning4 ,the wind came in little wafts1 like veins of cool white silver amid the great1 warm1 yellow gold of the sunshine4 ,the sea lay before us a mound of blue closing up the end of the valley1 as if overpowered into quietness by the lordliness of the sun overhead2 and the hills between which we went lay like great sheep1 with green wool1 basking in the blissful heat4 ,the gleam from the waters came up the pass2 the grand castle crowned the left-hand steep1 seeming to warm its old bones1 like the ruins of some awful megatherium in the lighted air2 one white sail sped like a glad thought across the spandrel of the sea2 the shadows of the rocks lay over our path1 like transient1 cool1 benignant deaths1 through which we had to pass again and again to yet higher glory beyond2 and one lark was somewhere in whose little breast the whole world was reflected as in the convex mirror of a dewdrop1 where it swelled so that he could not hold it1 but let it out again through his throat1 metamorphosed into music1 which he poured forth over all as the libation on the outspread altar of worship4 ,and of all this we talked to ,connie as we went2 and every now and then she would clap her hands gently in the fulness of her delight1 although she beheld the splendour only as with her ears1 or from the kisses of the wind on her cheeks4 ,but she seemed1 since her accident1 to have approached that condition which ,milton represents ,samson as longing for in his blindness1 wherein the sight should be through all parts diffused1 ,that she might look at will through every pore4 ,i had1 however1 arranged with the rest of the company1 that the moment we reached the cliff over the shore1 and turned to the left to cross the isthmus1 the conversation should no longer be about the things around us2 and especially ,i warned my wife and ,wynnie that no exclamation of surprise or delight should break from them before ,connie's eyes were uncovered4 ,i had said nothing to either of them about the difficulties of the way1 that1 seeing us take them as ordinary things1 they might take them so too1 and not be uneasy4 ,we never stopped till we reached the foot of the peninsula1 ne island1 upon which the keep of ,tintagel stands4 ,there we set ,connie down1 to take breath and ease our arms before we began the arduous way4 ,now1 now6 said ,connie eagerly1 lifting her hands in the belief that we were on the point of undoing the bandage from her eyes4 ,no1 no1 my love1 not yet1 ,i said1 and she lay still again1 only she looked more eager than before4 ,i am afraid ,i have tired out you and ,mr4 ,percivale1 papa1 she said4 ,percivale laughed so amusedly1 that she rejoined roguishly-- ,o yes6 ,i know every gentleman is a ,hercules--at least1 he chooses to be considered one6 ,but1 notwithstanding my firm faith in the fact1 ,i have a little womanly conscience left that is hard to hoodwink4 ,there was a speech for my wee ,connie to make6 ,the best answer and the best revenge was to lift her and go on4 ,this we did1 trying as well as we might to prevent the difference of level between us from tilting the litter too much for her comfort4 ,where are you going1 papa8 she said once1 but without a sign of fear in her voice1 as a little slip ,i made lowered my end of the litter suddenly4 ,you must be going up a steep place4 ,don't hurt yourself1 dear papa4 ,we had changed our positions1 and were now carrying her1 head foremost1 up the hill4 ,percivale led1 and ,i followed4 ,now ,i could see every change on her lovely face1 and it made me strong to endure2 for ,i did find it hard work1 ,i confess1 to get to the top4 ,it lay like a little sunny pool1 on which all the cloudy thoughts that moved in some unseen heaven cast exquisitely delicate changes of light and shade as they floated over it4 ,percivale strode on as if he bore a feather behind him4 ,i did wish we were at the top1 for my arms began to feel like iron-cables1 stiff and stark--only ,i was afraid of my fingers giving way4 ,my heart was beating uncomfortably too4 ,but ,percivale1 ,i felt almost inclined to quarrel with him before it was over1 he strode on so unconcernedly1 turning every corner of the zigzag where ,i expected him to propose a halt1 and striding on again1 as if there could be no pretence for any change of procedure4 ,but ,i held out1 strengthened by the play on my daughter's face1 delicate as the play on an opal--one that inclines more to the milk than the fire4 ,when at length we turned in through the gothic door in the battlemented wall1 and set our lovely burden down upon the grass-- ,percivale1 ,i said1 forgetting the proprieties in the affected humour of being angry with him1 so glad was ,i that we had her at length on the mount of glory1 why did you go on walking like a castle1 and pay no heed to me8 ,you didn't speak1 did you1 ,mr4 ,walton1 he returned1 with just a shadow of solicitude in the question4 ,no4 ,of course not1 ,i rejoined4 ,o1 then1 he returned1 in a tone of relief1 how could ,i8 ,you were my captain3 how could ,i give in so long as you were holding on8 ,i am afraid the ,percivale1 without the ,mister1 came again and again after this1 though ,i pulled myself up for it as often as ,i caught myself4 ,now1 papa6 said ,connie from the grass4 ,not yet1 my dear4 ,wait till your mamma and ,wynnie come4 ,let us go and meet them1 ,mr4 ,percivale4 ,o yes1 do1 papa4 ,leave me alone here without knowing where ,i am or what kind of a place ,i am in4 ,i should like to know how it feels4 ,i have never been alone in all my life4 ,very well1 my dear1 ,i said2 and ,percivale and ,i left her alone in the ruins4 ,we found ,ethelwyn toiling up with ,wynnie helping her all she could4 ,dear ,harry1 she said1 how could you think of bringing ,connie up such an awful place8 ,i wonder you dared to do it4 ,it's done you see1 wife1 ,i answered1 thanks to ,mr4 ,percivale1 who has nearly torn the breath out of me4 ,but now we must get you up1 and you will say that to see ,connie's delight1 not to mention your own1 is quite wages for the labour4 ,isn't she afraid to find herself so high up8 ,she knows nothing about it yet4 ,you do not mean you have left the child there with her eyes tied up4 ,to be sure4 ,we could not uncover them before you came4 ,it would spoil half the pleasure4 ,do let us make haste then4 ,it is surely dangerous to leave her so4 ,not in the least2 but she must be getting tired of the darkness4 ,take my arm now4 ,don't you think ,mrs4 ,walton had better take my arm1 said ,percivale1 and then you can put your hand on her back1 and help her a little that way4 ,we tried the plan1 found it a good one1 and soon reached the top4 ,the moment our eyes fell upon ,connie1 we could see that she had found the place neither fearful nor lonely4 ,the sweetest ghost of a smile hovered on her pale face1 which shone in the shadow of the old gateway of the keep1 with light from within her own sunny soul4 ,she lay in such still expectation1 that you would have thought she had just fallen asleep after receiving an answer to a prayer1 reminding me of a little-known sonnet of ,wordsworth's1 in which he describes as the type of ,death-- the face of one ,sleeping alone within a mossy cave ,with her face up to heaven2 that seemed to have ,pleasing remembrance of a thought foregone2 ,a lovely beauty in a summer grave4 ,footnote3 ,miscellaneous ,sonnets1 part i4#bh4 ,but she heard our steps1 and her face awoke4 ,is mamma come8 ,yes1 my darling4 ,i am here1 said her mother4 ,how do you feel8 ,perfectly well1 mamma1 thank you4 ,now1 papa6 ,one moment more1 my love4 ,now1 ,percivale4 ,we carried her to the spot we had agreed upon1 and while we held her a little inclined that she might see the better1 her mother undid the bandage from her head4 ,hold your hands over her eyes1 a little way from them1 ,i said to her as she untied the handkerchief1 that the light may reach them by degrees1 and not blind her4 ,ethelwyn did so for a few moments1 then removed them4 ,still for a moment or two more1 it was plain from her look of utter bewilderment1 that all was a confused mass of light and colour4 ,then she gave a little cry1 and to my astonishment1 almost fear1 half rose to a sitting posture4 ,one moment more and she laid herself gently back1 and wept and sobbed4 ,and now ,i may admit my reader to a share1 though at best but a dim reflex in my poor words1 of the glory that made her weep4 ,through the gothic-arched door in the battlemented wall1 which stood on the very edge of the precipitous descent1 so that nothing of the descent was seen1 and the door was as a framework to the picture1 ,connie saw a great gulf at her feet1 full to the brim of a splendour of light and colour4 ,before her rose the great ruins of rock and castle1 the ruin of rock with castle2 rough stone below1 clear green happy grass above1 even to the verge of the abrupt and awful precipice2 over it the summer sky so clear that it must have been clarified by sorrow and thought2 at the foot of the rocks1 hundreds of feet below1 the blue waters breaking in white upon the dark gray sands2 all full of the gladness of the sun overflowing in speechless delight1 and reflected in fresh gladness from stone and water and flower1 like new springs of light rippling forth from the earth itself to swell the universal tide of glory--all this seen through the narrow gothic archway of a door in a wall--up--down--on either hand4 ,but the main marvel was the look sheer below into the abyss full of light and air and colour1 its sides lined with rock and grass1 and its bottom lined with blue ripples and sand4 ,was it any wonder that my ,connie should cry aloud when the vision dawned upon her1 and then weep to ease a heart ready to burst with delight8 ,o ,lord ,god1 ,i said1 almost involuntarily1 thou art very rich4 ,thou art the one poet1 the one maker4 ,we worship thee4 ,make but our souls as full of glory in thy sight as this chasm is to our eyes glorious with the forms which thou hast cloven and carved out of nothingness1 and we shall be worthy to worship thee1 ,o ,lord1 our ,god4 ,for ,i was carried beyond myself with delight1 and with sympathy with ,connie's delight and with the calm worship of gladness in my wife's countenance4 ,but when my eye fell on ,wynnie1 ,i saw a trouble mingled with her admiration1 a self-accusation1 ,i think1 that she did not and could not enjoy it more2 and when ,i turned from her1 there were the eyes of ,percivale fixed on me in wonderment2 and for the moment ,i felt as ,david must have felt when1 in his dance of undignified delight that he had got the ark home again1 he saw the contemptuous eyes of ,michal fixed on him from the window4 ,but ,i could not leave it so4 ,i said to him--coldly ,i daresay3 ,excuse me1 ,mr4 ,percivale2 ,i forgot for the moment that ,i was not amongst my own family4 ,percivale took his hat off4 ,forgive my seeming rudeness1 ,mr4 ,walton4 ,i was half-envying and half-wondering4 ,you would not be surprised at my unconscious behaviour if you had seen as much of the wrong side of the stuff as ,i have seen in ,london4 ,i had some idea of what he meant2 but this was no time to enter upon a discussion4 ,i could only say-- ,my heart was full1 ,mr4 ,percivale1 and ,i let it overflow4 ,let me at least share in its overflow1 he rejoined1 and nothing more passed on the subject4 ,for the next ten minutes we stood in absolute silence4 ,we had set ,connie down on the grass again1 but propped up so that she could see through the doorway4 ,and she lay in still ecstasy4 ,but there was more to be seen ere we descended4 ,there was the rest of the little islet with its crop of down-grass1 on which the horses of all the knights of ,king ,arthur's round table might have fed for a week--yes1 for a fortnight1 without1 by any means1 encountering the short commons of war4 ,there were the ruins of the castle so built of plates of the laminated stone of the rocks on which they stood1 and so woven in or more properly incorporated with the outstanding rocks themselves1 that in some parts ,i found it impossible to tell which was building and which was rock--the walls themselves seeming like a growth out of the island itself1 so perfectly were they in harmony with1 and in kind the same as1 the natural ground upon which and of which they had been constructed4 ,and this would seem to me to be the perfection of architecture4 ,the work of man's hands should be so in harmony with the place where it stands that it must look as if it had grown out of the soil4 ,but the walls were in some parts so thin that one wondered how they could have stood so long4 ,they must have been built before the time of any formidable artillery--enough only for defence from arrows4 ,but then the island was nowhere commanded1 and its own steep cliffs would be more easily defended than any erections upon it4 ,clearly the intention was that no enemy should thereon find rest for the sole of his foot2 for if he was able to land1 farewell to the notion of any further defence4 ,then there was outside the walls the little chapel--such a tiny chapel6 of which little more than the foundation remained1 with the ruins of the altar still standing1 and outside the chancel1 nestling by its wall1 a coffin hollowed in the rock2 then the churchyard a little way off full of graves1 which1 ,i presume1 would have vanished long ago were it not that the very graves were founded on the rock4 ,there still stood old worn-out headstones of thin slate1 but no memorials were left4 ,then there was the fragment of arched passage underground laid open to the air in the centre of the islet2 and last1 and grandest of all1 the awful edges of the rock1 broken by time1 and carved by the winds and the waters into grotesque shapes and threatening forms4 ,over all the surface of the islet we carried ,connie1 and from three sides of this sea-fortress she looked abroad over the ,atlantic's level powers4 ,it blew a gentle ethereal breeze on the top2 but had there been such a wind as ,i have since stood against on that fearful citadel of nature1 ,i should have been in terror lest we should all be blown1 into the deep4 ,over the edge she peeped at the strange fantastic needle-rock1 and round the corner she peeped to see ,wynnie and her mother seated in what they call ,arthur's chair--a canopied hollow wrought in the plated rock by the mightiest of all solvents--air and water2 till at length it was time that we should take our leave of the few sheep that fed over the place1 and issuing by the gothic door1 wind away down the dangerous path to the safe ground below4 ,i think we had better tie up your eyes again1 ,connie8 ,i said4 ,why8 she asked1 in wonderment4 ,there's nothing higher yet1 is there8 ,no1 my love4 ,if there were1 you would hardly be able for it to-day1 ,i should think4 ,it is only to keep you from being frightened at the precipice as you go down4 ,but ,i sha'n't be frightened1 papa4 ,how do you know that8 ,because you are going to carry me4 ,but what if ,i should slip8 ,i might1 you know4 ,i don't mind4 ,i sha'n't mind being tumbled over the precipice1 if you do it4 ,i sha'n't be to blame1 and ,i'm sure you won't1 papa4 ,then she drew my head down and whispered in my ear1 ,if ,i get as much more by being killed1 as ,i have got by having my poor back hurt1 ,i'm sure it will be well worth it4 ,i tried to smile a reply1 for ,i could not speak one4 ,we took her just as she was1 and with some tremor on my part1 but not a single slip1 we bore her down the winding path1 her face showing all the time that1 instead of being afraid1 she was in a state of ecstatic delight4 ,my wife1 ,i could see1 was nervous1 however2 and she breathed a sigh of relief when we were once more at the foot4 ,well1 ,i'm glad that's over1 she said4 ,so am ,i1 ,i returned1 as we set down the litter4 ,poor papa6 ,i've pulled his arms to pieces6 and ,mr4 ,percivale's too6 ,percivale answered first by taking up a huge piece of stone4 ,then turning towards her1 he said1 ,look here1 ,miss ,connie2 and flung it far out from the isthmus on which we were resting4 ,we heard it strike on a rock below1 and then fall in a shower of fragments4 ,my arms are all right1 you see1 he said4 ,meantime1 ,wynnie had scrambled down to the shore1 where we had not yet been4 ,in a few minutes1 we still lingering1 she came running back to us out of breath with the news3 ,papa6 ,mr4 ,percivale6 there's such a grand cave down there6 ,it goes right through under the island4 ,connie looked so eager1 that ,percivale and ,i glanced at each other1 and without a word1 lifted her1 and followed ,wynnie4 ,it was a little way that we had to carry her down1 but it was very broken1 and insomuch more difficult than the other4 ,at length we stood in the cavern4 ,what a contrast to the vision overhead6--nothing to be seen but the cool1 dark vault of the cave1 long and winding1 with the fresh seaweed lying on its pebbly floor1 and its walls wet with the last tide1 for every tide rolled through in rising and falling--the waters on the opposite sides of the islet greeting through this cave2 the blue shimmer of the rising sea1 and the forms of huge outlying rocks1 looking in at the further end1 where the roof rose like a grand cathedral arch2 and the green gleam of veins rich with copper1 dashing and streaking the darkness in gloomy little chapels1 where the floor of heaped-up pebbles rose and rose within till it met the descending roof4 ,it was like a going-down from ,paradise into the grave--but a cool1 friendly1 brown-lighted grave1 which even in its darkest recesses bore some witness to the wind of ,god outside1 in the occasional ripple of shadowed light1 from the play of the sun on the waves1 that1 fleeted and reflected1 wandered across its jagged roof4 ,but we dared not keep ,connie long in the damp coolness2 and ,i have given my reader quite enough of description for one hour's reading4 ,he can scarcely be equal to more4 ,my invalids had now beheld the sea in such a different aspect1 that ,i no longer feared to go back to ,kilkhaven4 ,thither we went three days after1 and at my invitation1 ,percivale took ,turner's place in the carriage4 ,,chapter ,,xi4 ,,joe ,,and ,,his ,,trouble4 ,how bright the yellow shores of ,kilkhaven looked after the dark sands of ,tintagel6 ,but how low and tame its highest cliffs after the mighty rampart of rocks which there face the sea like a cordon of fierce guardians6 ,it was pleasant to settle down again in what had begun to look like home1 and was indeed made such by the boisterous welcome of ,dora and the boys4 ,connie's baby crowed aloud1 and stretched forth her chubby arms at sight of her4 ,the wind blew gently around us1 full both of the freshness of the clean waters and the scents of the down-grasses1 to welcome us back4 ,and the dread vision of the shore had now receded so far into the past1 that it was no longer able to hurt4 ,we had called at the blacksmith's house on our way home1 and found that he was so far better as to be working at his forge again4 ,his mother said he was used to such attacks1 and soon got over them4 ,i1 however1 feared that they indicated an approaching break-down4 ,indeed1 sir1 she said1 ,joe might be well enough if he liked4 ,it's all his own fault4 ,what do you mean8 ,i asked4 ,i cannot believe that your son is in any way guilty of his own illness4 ,he's a well-behaved lad1 my ,joe1 she answered2 but he hasn't learned what ,i had to learn long ago4 ,what is that8 ,i asked4 ,to make up his mind1 and stick to it4 ,to do one thing or the other4 ,she was a woman with a long upper lip and a judicial face1 and as she spoke1 her lip grew longer and longer2 and when she closed her mouth in mark of her own resolution1 that lip seemed to occupy two-thirds of all her face under the nose4 ,and what is it he won't do8 ,i don't mind whether he does it or not1 if he would only make--up--his--mind--and--stick--to--it4 ,what is it you want him to do1 then8 ,i don't want him to do it1 ,i'm sure4 ,it's no good to me--and wouldn't be much to him1 that ,i'll be bound4 ,howsomever1 he must please himself4 ,i thought it not very wonderful that he looked gloomy1 if there was no more sunshine for him at home than his mother's face indicated4 ,few things can make a man so strong and able for his work as a sun indoors1 whose rays are smiles1 ever ready to shine upon him when he opens the door1--the face of wife or mother or sister4 ,now his mother's face certainly was not sunny4 ,no doubt it must have shone upon him when he was a baby4 ,god has made that provision for babies1 who need sunshine so much that a mother's face cannot help being sunny to them3 why should the sunshine depart as the child grows older8 ,well1 ,i suppose ,i must not ask4 ,but ,i fear your son is very far from well4 ,such attacks do not often occur without serious mischief somewhere4 ,and if there is anything troubling him1 he is less likely to get over it4 ,if he would let somebody make up his mind for him1 and then stick to it-- ,o1 but that is impossible1 you know4 ,a man must make up his own mind4 ,that's just what he won't do4 ,all the time she looked naughty1 only after a self-righteous fashion4 ,it was evident that whatever was the cause of it1 she was not in sympathy with her son1 and therefore could not help him out of any difficulty he might be in4 ,i made no further attempt to learn from her the cause of her son's discomfort1 clearly a deeper cause than his illness4 ,in passing his workshop1 we stopped for a moment1 and ,i made an arrangement to meet him at the church the next day4 ,i was there before him1 and found that he had done a good deal since we left4 ,little remained except to get the keys put to rights1 and the rods attached to the cranks in the box4 ,to-day he was to bring a carpenter1 a cousin of his own1 with him4 ,they soon arrived1 and a small consultation followed4 ,the cousin was a bright-eyed1 cheruby-cheeked little man1 with a ready smile and white teeth3 ,i thought he might help me to understand what was amiss in ,joseph's affairs4 ,but ,i would not make the attempt except openly4 ,i therefore said half in a jocular fashion1 as with gloomy1 self-withdrawn countenance the smith was fitting one loop into another in two of his iron rods1-- ,i wish we could get this cousin of yours to look a little more cheerful4 ,you would think he had quarrelled with the sunshine4 ,the carpenter showed his white teeth between his rosy lips4 ,well1 sir1 if you'll excuse me1 you see my cousin ,joe is not like the rest of us4 ,he's a religious man1 is ,joe4 ,but ,i don't see how that should make him miserable4 ,it hasn't made me miserable4 ,i hope ,i'm a religious man myself4 ,it makes me happy every day of my life4 ,ah1 well1 returned the carpenter1 in a thoughtful tone1 as he worked away gently to get the inside out of the oak-chest without hurting it1 ,i don't say it's the religion1 for ,i don't know2 but perhaps it's the way he takes it up4 ,he don't look after hisself enough2 he's always thinking about other people1 you see1 sir2 and it seems to me1 sir1 that if you don't look after yourself1 why1 who is to look after you8 ,that's common sense1 ,i think4 ,it was a curious contrast--the merry friendly face1 which shone good-fellowship to all mankind1 accusing the sombre1 pale1 sad1 severe1 even somewhat bitter countenance beside him1 of thinking too much about other people1 and too little about himself4 ,of course it might be correct in a way4 ,there is all the difference between a comfortable1 healthy inclination1 and a pained1 conscientious principle4 ,it was a smile very unlike his cousin's with which ,joe heard his remarks on himself4 ,but1 ,i said1 you will allow1 at least1 that if everybody would take ,joe's way of it1 there would then be no occasion for taking care of yourself4 ,i don't see why1 sir4 ,why1 because everybody would take care of everybody else4 ,not so well1 ,i doubt1 sir4 ,yes1 and a great deal better4 ,at any rate1 that's a long way off2 and mean time1 who's to take care of the odd man like ,joe there1 that don't look after hisself8 ,why1 ,god1 of course4 ,well1 there's just where ,i'm out4 ,i don't know nothing about that branch1 sir4 ,i saw a grateful light mount up in ,joe's gloomy eyes as ,i spoke thus upon his side of the question4 ,he said nothing1 however2 and his cousin volunteering no further information1 ,i did not push any advantage ,i might have gained4 ,at noon ,i made them leave their work1 and come home with me to have their dinner2 they hoped to finish the job before dusk4 ,harry ,cobb and ,i dropped behind1 and ,joe ,harper walked on in front1 apparently sunk in meditation4 ,scarcely were we out of the churchyard1 and on the road leading to the rectory1 when ,i saw the sexton's daughter meeting us4 ,she had almost come up to ,joe before he saw her1 for his gaze was bent on the ground1 and he started4 ,they shook hands in what seemed to me an odd1 constrained1 yet familiar fashion1 and then stood as if they wanted to talk1 but without speaking4 ,harry and ,i passed1 both with a nod of recognition to the young woman1 but neither of us had the ill-manners to look behind4 ,i glanced at ,harry1 and he answered me with a queer look4 ,when we reached the turning that would hide them from our view1 ,i looked back almost involuntarily1 and there they were still standing4 ,but before we reached the door of the rectory1 ,joe got up with us4 ,there was something remarkable in the appearance of ,agnes ,coombes1 the sexton's daughter4 ,she was about six-and-twenty1 ,i should imagine1 the youngest of the family1 with a sallow1 rather sickly complexion1 somewhat sorrowful eyes1 a smile rare and sweet1 a fine figure1 tall and slender1 and a graceful gait4 ,i now saw1 ,i thought1 a good hair's-breadth further into the smith's affairs4 ,beyond the hair's-breadth1 however1 all was dark4 ,but ,i saw likewise that the well of truth1 whence ,i might draw the whole business1 must be the girl's mother4 ,after the men had had their dinner and rested a while1 they went back to the church1 and ,i went to the sexton's cottage4 ,i found the old man seated at the window1 with his pot of beer on the sill1 and an empty plate beside it4 ,come in1 sir1 he said1 rising1 as ,i put my head in at the door4 ,the mis'ess ben't in1 but she'll be here in a few minutes4 ,o1 it's of no consequence1 ,i said4 ,are they all well8 ,all comfortable1 sir4 ,it be fine dry weather for them1 this1 sir4 ,it be in winter it be worst for them4 ,but it's a snug enough shelter you've got here4 ,it seems such1 anyhow2 though1 to be sure1 it is the blasts of winter that find out the weak places both in house and body4 ,it ben't the wind touch them he said2 they be safe enough from the wind4 ,it be the wet1 sir4 ,there ben't much snow in these parts2 but when it du come1 that be very bad for them1 poor things6 ,could it be that he was harping on the old theme again8 ,but at least this cottage keeps out the wet1 ,i said4 ,if not1 we must have it seen to4 ,this cottage du well enough1 sir4 ,it'll last my time1 anyhow4 ,then why are you pitying your family for having to live in it8 ,bless your heart1 sir6 ,it's not them4 ,they du well enough4 ,it's my people out yonder4 ,you've got the souls to look after1 and ,i've got the bodies4 ,that's what it be1 sir4 ,to be sure6 ,the last exclamation was uttered in a tone of impatient surprise at my stupidity in giving all my thoughts and sympathies to the living1 and none to the dead4 ,i pursued the subject no further1 but as ,i lay in bed that night1 it began to dawn upon me as a lovable kind of hallucination in which the man indulged4 ,he too had an office in the ,church of ,god1 and he would magnify that office4 ,he could not bear that there should be no further outcome of his labour2 that the burying of the dead out of sight should be the be-all and the end-all4 ,he was ,god's vicar1 the gardener in ,god's ,acre1 as the ,germans call the churchyard4 ,when all others had forsaken the dead1 he remained their friend1 caring for what little comfort yet remained possible to them4 ,hence in all changes of air and sky above1 he attributed to them some knowledge of the same1 and some share in their consequences even down in the darkness of the tomb4 ,it was his way of keeping up the relation between the living and the dead4 ,finding ,i made him no reply1 he took up the word again4 ,you've got your part1 sir1 and ,i've got mine4 ,you up into the pulpit1 and ,i down into the grave4 ,but it'll be all the same by and by4 ,i hope it will1 ,i answered4 ,but when you do go down into your own grave1 you'll know a good deal less about it than you do now4 ,you'll find you've got other things to think about4 ,but here comes your wife4 ,she'll talk about the living rather than the dead4 ,that's natural1 sir4 ,she brought 'em to life1 and ,i buried 'em--at least1 best part of 'em4 ,if only ,i had the other two safe down with the rest6 ,i remembered what the old woman had told me--that she had two boys in the sea2 and ,i knew therefore what he meant4 ,he regarded his drowned boys as still tossed about in the weary wet cold ocean1 and would have gladly laid them to rest in the warm dry churchyard4 ,he wiped a tear from the corner of his eye with the back of his hand1 and saying1 ,well1 ,i must be off to my gardening1 left me with his wife4 ,i saw then that1 humorist as the old man might be1 his humour1 like that of all true humorists1 lay close about the wells of weeping4 ,the old man seems a little out of sorts1 ,i said to his wife4 ,well1 sir1 she answered1 with her usual gentleness1 a gentleness which obedient suffering had perfected1 this be the day he buried our ,nancy1 this day two years2 and to-day ,agnes be come home from her work poorly2 and the two things together they've upset him a bit4 ,i met ,agnes coming this way4 ,where is she8 ,i believe she be in the churchyard1 sir4 ,i've been to the doctor about her4 ,i hope it's nothing serious4 ,i hope not1 sir2 but you see--four on 'em1 sir6 ,well1 she's in ,god's hands1 you know4 ,that she be1 sir4 ,i want to ask you about something1 ,mrs4 ,coombes4 ,what be that1 sir8 ,if ,i can tell1 ,i will1 you may be sure1 sir4 ,i want to know what's the matter with ,joe ,harper1 the blacksmith4 ,they du say it be a consumption1 sir4 ,but what has he got on his mind8 ,he's got nothing on his mind1 sir4 ,he be as good a by as ever stepped1 ,i assure you1 sir4 ,but ,i am sure there is something or other on his mind4 ,he's not so happy as he should be4 ,he's not the man1 it seems to me1 to be unhappy because he's ill4 ,a man like him would not be miserable because he was going to die4 ,it might make him look sad sometimes1 but not gloomy as he looks4 ,well1 sir1 ,i believe you be right1 and perhaps ,i know summat4 ,but it's part guessing4--,i believe my ,agnes and ,joe ,harper are as fond upon one another as any two in the county4 ,are they not going to be married then8 ,there be the pint1 sir4 ,i don't believe ,joe ever said a word o' the sort to ,aggy4 ,she never could ha' kep it from me1 sir4 ,why doesn't he then8 ,that's the pint again1 sir4 ,all as knows him says it's because he be in such bad health1 and he thinks he oughtn't to go marrying with one foot in the grave4 ,he never said so to me2 but ,i think very likely that be it4 ,for that matter1 ,mrs4 ,coombes1 we've all got one foot in the grave1 ,i think4 ,that be very true1 sir4 ,and what does your daughter think8 ,i believe she thinks the same4 ,and so they go on talking to each other1 quiet-like1 like old married folks1 not like lovers at all1 sir4 ,but ,i can't help fancying it have something to do with my ,aggy's pale face4 ,and something to do with ,joe's pale face too1 ,mrs4 ,coombes1 ,i said4 ,thank you4 ,you've told me more than ,i expected4 ,it explains everything4 ,i must have it out with ,joe now4 ,o deary me6 sir1 don't go and tell him ,i said anything1 as if ,i wanted him to marry my daughter4 ,don't you be afraid4 ,i'll take good care of that4 ,and don't fancy ,i'm fond of meddling with other people's affairs4 ,but this is a case in which ,i ought to do something4 ,joe's a fine fellow4 ,that he be1 sir4 ,i couldn't wish a better for a son-in-law4 ,i put on my hat4 ,you won't get me into no trouble with ,joe1 will ye1 sir6 ,indeed ,i will not1 ,mrs4 ,coombes4 ,i should be doing a great deal more harm than good if ,i said a word to make him doubt you4 ,i went straight to the church4 ,there were the two men working away in the shadowy tower1 and there was ,agnes standing beside1 knitting like her mother1 so quiet1 so solemn even1 that it did indeed look as if she were a long-married wife1 hovering about her husband at his work4 ,harry was saying something to her as ,i went in1 but when they saw me they were silent1 and ,agnes gently withdrew4 ,do you think you will get through to-night8 ,i asked4 ,sure of it1 sir1 answered ,harry4 ,you shouldn't be sure of anything1 ,harry4 ,we are told in the ,new ,testament that we ought to say ,if the ,lord will1 said ,joe4 ,now1 ,joe1 you're too hard upon ,harry1 ,i said4 ,you don't think that the ,bible means to pull a man up every step like that1 till he's afraid to speak a word4 ,it was about a long journey and a year's residence that the ,apostle ,james was speaking4 ,no doubt1 sir4 ,but the principle's the same4 ,harry can no more be sure of finishing his work before it be dark1 than those people could be of going their long journey4 ,that is perfectly true4 ,but you are taking the letter for the spirit1 and that1 ,i suspect1 in more ways than one4 ,the religion does not lie in not being sure about anything1 but in a loving desire that the will of ,god in the matter1 whatever it be1 may be done4 ,and if ,harry has not learned yet to care about the will of ,god1 what is the good of coming down upon him that way1 as if that would teach him in the least4 ,when he loves ,god1 then1 and not till then1 will he care about his will4 ,nor does the religion lie in saying1 if the ,lord will1 every time anything is to be done4 ,it is a most dangerous thing to use sacred words often4 ,it makes them so common to our ear that at length1 when used most solemnly1 they have not half the effect they ought to have1 and that is a serious loss4 ,what the ,apostle means is1 that we should always be in the mood of looking up to ,god and having regard to his will1 not always writing ,d4,v4 for instance1 as so many do--most irreverently1 ,i think--using a ,latin contraction for the beautiful words1 just as if they were a charm1 or as if ,god would take offence if they did not make the salvo of acknowledgment4 ,it seems to me quite heathenish4 ,our hearts ought ever to be in the spirit of those words2 our lips ought to utter them rarely4 ,besides1 there are some things a man might be pretty sure the ,lord wills4 ,it sounds fine1 sir2 but ,i'm not sure that ,i understand what you mean to say4 ,it sounds to me like a darkening of wisdom4 ,i saw that ,i had irritated him1 and so had in some measure lost ground4 ,but ,harry struck in-- ,how can you say that now1 ,joe8 ,i know what the parson means well enough1 and everybody knows ,i ain't got half the brains you've got4 ,the reason is1 ,harry1 that he's got something in his head that stands in the way4 ,and there's nothing in my head to stand in the way6 returned ,harry1 laughing4 ,this made me laugh too1 and even ,joe could not help a sympathetic grin4 ,by this time it was getting dark4 ,i'm afraid1 ,harry1 after all1 you won't get through to-night4 ,i begin to think so too1 sir4 ,and there's ,joe saying1 ',i told you so1' over and over to himself1 though he won't say it out like a man4 ,joe answered only with another grin4 ,i tell you what it is1 ,harry1 ,i said--you must come again on ,monday4 ,and on your way home1 just look in and tell ,joe's mother that ,i have kept him over to-morrow4 ,the change will do him good4 ,no1 sir1 that can't he4 ,i haven't got a clean shirt4 ,you can have a shirt of mine1 ,i said4 ,but ,i'm afraid you'll want your ,sunday clothes4 ,i'll bring them for you1 ,joe--before you're up1 interposed ,harry4 ,and then you can go to church with ,aggy ,coombes1 you know4 ,here was just what ,i wanted4 ,hold your tongue1 ,harry1 said ,joe angrily4 ,you're talking of what you don't know anything about4 ,well1 ,joe1 ,i ben't a fool1 if ,i ben't so religious as you be4 ,you ben't a bad fellow1 though you be a ,methodist1 and ,i ben't a fool1 though ,i be ,harry ,cobb4 ,what do you mean1 ,harry8 ,do hold your tongue4 ,well1 ,i'll tell you what ,i mean first1 and then ,i'll hold my tongue4 ,i mean this--that nobody with two eyes1 or one eye1 for that matter1 in his head1 could help seeing the eyes you and ,aggy make at each other1 and why you don't port your helm and board her--,i won't say it's more than ,i know1 but ,i du say it to be more than ,i think be fair to the young woman4 ,hold your tongue1 ,harry4 ,i said ,i would when ,i'd answered you as to what ,i meaned4 ,so no more at present2 but ,i'll be over with your clothes afore you're up in the morning4 ,as ,harry spoke he was busy gathering his tools4 ,they won't be in the way1 will they1 sir8 he said1 as he heaped them together in the furthest corner of the tower4 ,not in the least1 ,i returned4 ,if ,i had my way1 all the tools used in building the church should be carved on the posts and pillars of it1 to indicate the sacredness of labour1 and the worship of ,god that lies1 not in building the church merely1 but in every honest trade honestly pursued for the good of mankind and the need of the workman4 ,for a necessity of ,god is laid upon every workman as well as on ,st4 ,paul4 ,only ,st4 ,paul saw it1 and every workman doesn't1 ,harry4 ,thank you1 sir4 ,i like that way of it4 ,i almost think ,i could be a little bit religious after your way of it1 sir4 ,almost1 ,harry6 growled ,joe--not unkindly4 ,now1 you hold your tongue1 ,joe1 ,i said4 ,leave ,harry to me4 ,you may take him1 if you like1 after ,i've done with him4 ,laughing merrily1 but making no other reply than a hearty good-night1 ,harry strode away out of the church1 and ,joe and ,i went home together4 ,when he had had his tea1 ,i asked him to go out with me for a walk4 ,the sun was shining aslant upon the downs from over the sea4 ,we rose out of the shadowy hollow to the sunlit brow4 ,i was a little in advance of ,joe4 ,happening to turn1 ,i saw the light full on his head and face1 while the rest of his body had not yet emerged from the shadow4 ,stop1 ,joe1 ,i said4 ,i want to see you so for a moment4 ,he stood--a little surprised4 ,you look just like a man rising from the dead1 ,joe1 ,i said4 ,i don't know what you mean1 sir1 he returned4 ,i will describe yourself to you4 ,your head and face are full of sunlight1 the rest of your body is still buried in the shadow4 ,look2 ,i will stand where you are now2 and you come here4 ,you will soon see what ,i mean4 ,we changed places4 ,joe stared for a moment4 ,then his face brightened4 ,i see what you mean1 sir1 he said4 ,i fancy you don't mean the resurrection of the body1 but the resurrection of righteousness4 ,i do1 ,joe4 ,did it ever strike you that the whole history of the ,christian life is a series of such resurrections8 ,every time a man bethinks himself that he is not walking in the light1 that he has been forgetting himself1 and must repent1 that he has been asleep and must awake1 that he has been letting his garments trail1 and must gird up the loins of his mind--every time this takes place1 there is a resurrection in the world4 ,yes1 ,joe2 and every time that a man finds that his heart is troubled1 that he is not rejoicing in ,god1 a resurrection must follow--a resurrection out of the night of troubled thoughts into the gladness of the truth4 ,for the truth is1 and ever was1 and ever must be1 gladness1 however much the souls on which it shines may be obscured by the clouds of sorrow1 troubled by the thunders of fear1 or shot through with the lightnings of pain4 ,now1 ,joe1 will you let me tell you what you are like--,i do not know your thoughts2 ,i am only judging from your words and looks8 ,you may if you like1 sir1 answered ,joe1 a little sulkily4 ,but ,i was not to be repelled4 ,i stood up in the sunlight1 so that my eyes caught only about half the sun's disc4 ,then ,i bent my face towards the earth4 ,what part of me is the light shining on now1 ,joe8 ,just the top of your head1 answered he4 ,there1 then1 ,i returned1 that is just what you are like--a man with the light on his head1 but not on his face4 ,and why not on your face8 ,because you hold your head down4 ,isn't it possible1 sir1 that a man might lose the light on his face1 as you put it1 by doing his duty8 ,that is a difficult question1 ,i replied4 ,i must think before ,i answer it4 ,i mean1 added ,joe--mightn't his duty be a painful one8 ,yes4 ,but ,i think that would rather etherealise than destroy the light4 ,behind the sorrow would spring a yet greater light from the very duty itself4 ,i have expressed myself badly1 but you will see what ,i mean4--,to be frank with you1 ,joe1 ,i do not see that light in your face4 ,therefore ,i think something must be wrong with you4 ,remember a good man is not necessarily in the right4 ,st4 ,peter was a good man1 yet our ,lord called him ,satan--and meant it of course1 for he never said what he did not mean4 ,how can ,i be wrong when all my trouble comes from doing my duty--nothing else1 as far as ,i know8 ,then1 ,i replied1 a sudden light breaking in on my mind1 ,i doubt whether what you suppose to be your duty can be your duty4 ,if it were1 ,i do not think it would make you so miserable4 ,at least--,i may be wrong1 but ,i venture to think so4 ,what is a man to go by1 then8 ,if he thinks a thing is his duty1 is he not to do it8 ,most assuredly--until he knows better4 ,but it is of the greatest consequence whether the supposed duty be the will of ,god or the invention of one's own fancy or mistaken judgment4 ,a real duty is always something right in itself4 ,the duty a man makes his for the time1 by supposing it to be a duty1 may be something quite wrong in itself4 ,the duty of a ,hindoo widow is to burn herself on the body of her husband4 ,but that duty lasts no longer than till she sees that1 not being the will of ,god1 it is not her duty4 ,a real duty1 on the other hand1 is a necessity of the human nature1 without seeing and doing which a man can never attain to the truth and blessedness of his own being4 ,it was the duty of the early hermits to encourage the growth of vermin upon their bodies1 for they supposed that was pleasing to ,god2 but they could not fare so well as if they had seen the truth that the will of ,god was cleanliness4 ,and there may be far more serious things done by ,christian people against the will of ,god1 in the fancy of doing their duty1 than such a trifle as swarming with worms4 ,in a word1 thinking a thing is your duty makes it your duty only till you know better4 ,and the prime duty of every man is to seek and find1 that he may do1 the will of ,god4 ,but do you think1 sir1 that a man is likely to be doing what he ought not1 if he is doing what he don't like8 ,not so likely1 ,i allow4 ,but there may be ambition in it4 ,a man must not want to be better than the right4 ,that is the delusion of the anchorite--a delusion in which the man forgets the rights of others for the sake of his own sanctity4 ,it might be for the sake of another person1 and not for the person's own sake at all4 ,it might be2 but except it were the will of ,god for that other person1 it would be doing him or her a real injury4 ,we were coming gradually towards what ,i wanted to make the point in question4 ,i wished him to tell me all about it himself1 however1 for ,i knew that while advice given on request is generally disregarded1 to offer advice unasked is worthy only of a fool4 ,but how are you to know the will of ,god in every case8 asked ,joe4 ,by looking at the general laws of life1 and obeying them--except there be anything special in a particular case to bring it under a higher law4 ,ah6 but that be just what there is here4 ,well1 my dear fellow1 that may be2 but the special conduct may not be right for the special case for all that4 ,the speciality of the case may not be even sufficient to take it from under the ordinary rule4 ,but it is of no use talking generals4 ,let us come to particulars4 ,if you can trust me1 tell me all about it1 and we may be able to let some light in4 ,i am sure there is darkness somewhere4 ,i will turn it over in my mind1 sir2 and if ,i can bring myself to talk about it1 ,i will4 ,i would rather tell you than anyone else4 ,i said no more4 ,we watched a glorious sunset--there never was a grander place for sunsets--and went home4 ,,chapter ,,xii4 ,a ,,small ,,adventure4 ,the next morning ,harry came with the clothes4 ,but ,joe did not go to church4 ,neither did ,agnes make her appearance that morning4 ,they were both present at the evening service1 however4 ,when we came out of church1 it was cloudy and dark1 and the wind was blowing cold from the sea4 ,the sky was covered with one cloud1 but the waves tossing themselves against the rocks1 flashed whiteness out of the general gloom4 ,as the tide rose the wind increased4 ,it was a night of surly temper--hard and gloomy4 ,not a star cracked the blue above--there was no blue2 and the wind was gurly2 ,i once heard that word in ,scotland1 and never forgot it4 ,after one of our usual gatherings in ,connie's room1 which were much shorter here because of the evening service in summer1 ,i withdrew till supper should be ready4 ,now ,i have always had1 as ,i think ,i have incidentally stated before1 a certain peculiar pleasure in the surly aspects of nature4 ,when ,i was a young man this took form in opposition and defiance2 since ,i had begun to grow old the form had changed into a sense of safety4 ,i welcomed such aspects1 partly at least1 because they roused my faith to look through and beyond the small region of human conditions in which alone the storm can be and blow1 and thus induced a feeling like that of the child who lies in his warm crib and listens to the howling of one of these same storms outside the strong-built house which yet trembles at its fiercer onsets3 the house is not in danger2 or1 if it be1 that is his father's business1 not his4 ,hence it came that1 after supper1 ,i put on my great-coat and travelling-cap1 and went out into the ill-tempered night--speaking of it in its human symbolism4 ,i meant to have a stroll down to the breakwater1 of which ,i have yet said little1 but which was a favourite resort1 both of myself and my children4 ,at the further end of it1 always covered at high water1 was an outlying cluster of low rocks1 in the heart of which the lord of the manor1 a noble-hearted ,christian gentleman of the old school1 had constructed a bath of graduated depth--an open-air swimming-pool--the only really safe place for men who were swimmers to bathe in4 ,thither ,i was in the habit of taking my two little men every morning1 and bathing with them1 that ,i might develop the fish that was in them2 for1 as ,george ,herbert says3 ,man is everything1 ,and more3 he is a tree1 yet bears no fruit2 ,a beast1 yet is1 or should be1 more2 and he might have gone on to say that he is1 or should be1 a fish as well4 ,it will seem strange to any reader who can recall the position of my ,connie's room1 that the nearest way to the breakwater should be through that room2 but so it was4 ,i mention the fact because ,i want my readers to understand a certain peculiarity of the room4 ,by the side of the window which looked out upon the breakwater was a narrow door1 apparently of a closet or cupboard1 which communicated1 however1 with a narrow1 curving1 wood-built passage1 leading into a little wooden hut1 the walls of which were by no means impervious to the wind1 for they were formed of outside-planks1 with the bark still upon them4 ,from this hut one or two little windows looked seaward1 and a door led out on the bit of sward in which lay the flower-bed under ,connie's window4 ,from this spot again a door in the low wall and thick hedge led out on the downs1 where a path wound along the cliffs that formed the side of the bay1 till1 descending under the storm-tower1 it brought you to the root of the breakwater4 ,this mole stretched its long strong low back to a rock a good way out1 breaking the force of the waves1 and rendering the channel of a small river1 that here flowed into the sea across the sands from the mouth of the canal1 a refuge from the ,atlantic4 ,but it was a roadway often hard to reach4 ,in fair weather even1 the wind falling as the vessel rounded the point of the breakwater into the calm of the projecting headlands1 the under-current would sometimes dash her helpless on the rocks4 ,during all this heavenly summer there had been no thought or fear of any such disaster4 ,the present night was a hint of what weather would yet come4 ,when ,i went into ,connie's room1 ,i found her lying in bed a very picture of peace4 ,but my entrance destroyed the picture4 ,papa1 she said1 why have you got your coat on8 ,surely you are not going out to-night4 ,the wind is blowing dreadfully4 ,not very dreadfully1 ,connie4 ,it blew much worse the night we found your baby4 ,but it is very dark4 ,i allow that2 but there is a glimmer from the sea4 ,i am only going on the breakwater for a few minutes4 ,you know ,i like a stormy night quite as much as a fine one4 ,i shall be miserable till you come home1 papa4 ,nonsense1 ,connie4 ,you don't think your father hasn't sense to take care of himself6 ,or rather1 ,connie1 for ,i grant that is poor ground of comfort1 you don't think ,i can go anywhere without my ,father to take care of me8 ,but there is no occasion--is there1 papa8 ,do you think ,i should be better pleased with my boys if they shrunk from everything involving the least possibility of danger because there was no occasion for it8 ,that is just the way to make cowards4 ,and ,i am certain ,god would not like his children to indulge in such moods of self-preservation as that4 ,he might well be ashamed of them4 ,the fearful are far more likely to meet with accidents than the courageous4 ,but really1 ,connie1 ,i am almost ashamed of talking so4 ,it is all your fault4 ,there is positively no ground for apprehension1 and ,i hope you won't spoil my walk by the thought that my foolish little girl is frightened4 ,i will be good--indeed ,i will1 papa1 she said1 holding up her mouth to kiss me4 ,i left her room1 and went through the wooden passage into the bark hut4 ,the wind roared about it1 shook it1 and pawed it1 and sung and whistled in the chinks of the planks4 ,i went out and shut the door4 ,that moment the wind seized upon me1 and ,i had to fight with it4 ,when ,i got on the path leading along the edge of the downs1 ,i felt something lighter than any feather fly in my face4 ,when ,i put up my hand1 ,i found my cheek wet4 ,again and again ,i was thus assailed1 but when ,i got to the breakwater ,i found what it was4 ,they were flakes of foam1 bubbles worked up into little masses of adhering thousands1 which the wind blew off the waters and across the downs1 carrying some of them miles inland4 ,when ,i reached the breakwater1 and looked along its ridge through the darkness of the night1 ,i was bewildered to see a whiteness lying here and there in a great patch upon its top4 ,they were but accumulations of these foam-flakes1 like soap-suds1 lying so thick that ,i expected to have to wade through them1 only they vanished at the touch of my feet4 ,till then ,i had almost believed it was snow ,i saw4 ,on the edge of the waves1 in quieter spots1 they lay like yeast1 foaming and working4 ,now and then a little rush of water from a higher wave swept over the top of the broad breakwater1 as with head bowed sideways against the wind1 ,i struggled along towards the rock at its end2 but ,i said to myself1 ,the tide is falling fast1 and salt water hurts nobody1 and struggled on over the huge rough stones of the mighty heap1 outside which the waves were white with wrath1 inside which they had fallen asleep1 only heaving with the memory of their late unrest4 ,i reached the tall rock at length1 climbed the rude stair leading up to the flagstaff1 and looked abroad1 if looking it could be called1 into the thick dark4 ,but the wind blew so strong on the top that ,i was glad to descend4 ,between me and the basin where yesterday morning ,i had bathed in still water and sunshine with my boys1 rolled the deathly waves4 ,i wandered on the rough narrow space yet uncovered1 stumbling over the stones and the rocky points between which they lay1 stood here and there half-meditating1 and at length1 finding a sheltered nook in a mass of rock1 sat with the wind howling and the waves bursting around me4 ,there ,i fell into a sort of brown study--almost a half-sleep4 ,but ,i had not sat long before ,i came broad awake1 for ,i heard voices1 low and earnest4 ,one ,i recognised as ,joe's voice4 ,the other was a woman's4 ,i could not tell what they said for some time1 and therefore felt no immediate necessity for disclosing my proximity1 but sat debating with myself whether ,i should speak to them or not4 ,at length1 in a lull of the wind1 ,i heard the woman say--,i could fancy with a sigh-- ,i'm sure you'll du what is right1 ,joe4 ,don't 'e think o' me1 ,joe4 ,it's just of you that ,i du think1 ,aggy4 ,you know it ben't for my sake4 ,surely you know that8 ,there was no answer for a moment4 ,i was still doubting what ,i had best do--go away quietly or let them know ,i was there--when she spoke again4 ,there was a momentary lull now in the noises of both wind and water1 and ,i heard what she said well enough4 ,it ben't for me to contradict you1 ,joe4 ,but ,i don't think you be going to die4 ,you be no worse than last year4 ,be you now1 ,joe8 ,it flashed across me how once before1 a stormy night and darkness had brought me close to a soul in agony4 ,then ,i was in agony myself2 now the world was all fair and hopeful around me--the portals of the world beyond ever opening wider as ,i approached them1 and letting out more of their glory to gladden the path to their threshold4 ,but here were two souls straying in a mist which faith might roll away1 and leave them walking in the light4 ,the moment was come4 ,i must speak4 ,joe6 ,i called out4 ,who's there8 he cried2 and ,i heard him start to his feet4 ,only ,mr4 ,walton4 ,where are you8 ,we can't be very far off1 he answered1 not in a tone of any pleasure at finding me so nigh4 ,i rose1 and peering about through the darkness1 found that they were a little higher up on the same rock by which ,i was sheltered4 ,you mustn't think1 ,i said1 that ,i have been eavesdropping4 ,i had no idea anyone was near me till ,i heard your voices1 and ,i did not hear a word till just the last sentence or two4 ,i saw someone go up the ,castle-rock1 said ,joe2 but ,i thought he was gone away again4 ,it will be a lesson to me4 ,i'm no tell-tale1 ,joe1 ,i returned1 as ,i scrambled up the rock4 ,you will have no cause to regret that ,i happened to overhear a little4 ,i am sure1 ,joe1 you will never say anything you need be ashamed of4 ,but what ,i heard was sufficient to let me into the secret of your trouble4 ,will you let me talk to ,joe1 ,agnes8 ,i've been young myself1 and1 to tell the truth1 ,i don't think ,i'm old yet4 ,i am sure1 sir1 she answered1 you won't be hard on ,joe and me4 ,i don't suppose there be anything wrong in liking each other1 though we can't be--married4 ,she spoke in a low tone1 and her voice trembled very much2 yet there was a certain womanly composure in her utterance4 ,i'm sure it's very bold of me to talk so1 she added1 but ,joe will tell you all about it4 ,i was close beside them now1 and fancied ,i saw through the dusk the motion of her hand stealing into his4 ,well1 ,joe1 this is just what ,i wanted1 ,i said4 ,a woman can be braver than a big smith sometimes4 ,agnes has done her part4 ,now you do yours1 and tell me all about it4 ,no response followed my adjuration4 ,i must help him4 ,i think ,i know how the matter lies1 ,joe4 ,you think you are not going to live long1 and that therefore you ought not to marry4 ,am ,i right8 ,not far off it1 sir1 he answered4 ,now1 ,joe1 ,i said1 can't we talk as friends about this matter8 ,i have no right to intrude into your affairs--none in the least--except what friendship gives me4 ,if you say ,i am not to talk about it1 ,i shall be silent4 ,to force advice upon you would be as impertinent as useless4 ,it's all the same1 ,i'm afraid1 sir4 ,my mind has been made up for a long time4 ,what right have ,i to bring other people into trouble8 ,but ,i take it kind of you1 sir1 though ,i mayn't look over-pleased4 ,agnes wants to hear your way of it4 ,i'm agreeable4 ,this was not very encouraging4 ,still ,i thought it sufficient ground for proceeding4 ,i suppose you will allow that the root of all ,christian behaviour is the will of ,god8 ,surely1 sir4 ,is it not the will of ,god1 then1 that when a man and woman love each other1 they should marry8 ,certainly1 sir--where there be no reasons against it4 ,of course4 ,and you judge you see reason for not doing so1 else you would8 ,i do see that a man should not bring a woman into trouble for the sake of being comfortable himself for the rest of a few weary days4 ,agnes was sobbing gently behind her handkerchief4 ,i knew how gladly she would be ,joe's wife1 if only to nurse him through his last illness4 ,not except it would make her comfortable too1 ,i grant you1 ,joe4 ,but listen to me4 ,in the first place1 you don't know1 and you are not required to know1 when you are going to die4 ,in fact1 you have nothing to do with it4 ,many a life has been injured by the constant expectation of death4 ,it is life we have to do with1 not death4 ,the best preparation for the night is to work while the day lasts1 diligently4 ,the best preparation for death is life4 ,besides1 ,i have known delicate people who have outlived all their strong relations1 and been left alone in the earth--because they had possibly taken too much care of themselves4 ,but marriage is ,god's will1 and death is ,god's will1 and you have no business to set the one over against1 as antagonistic to1 the other4 ,for anything you know1 the gladness and the peace of marriage may be the very means intended for your restoration to health and strength4 ,i suspect your desire to marry1 fighting against the fancy that you ought not to marry1 has a good deal to do with the state of health in which you now find yourself4 ,a man would get over many things if he were happy1 that he cannot get over when he is miserable4 ,but it's for ,aggy4 ,you forget that4 ,i do not forget it4 ,what right have you to seek for her another kind of welfare than you would have yourself8 ,are you to treat her as if she were worldly when you are not--to provide for her a comfort which yourself you would despise8 ,why should you not marry because you have to die soon8--if you are thus doomed1 which to me is by no means clear4 ,why not have what happiness you may for the rest of your sojourn8 ,if you find at the end of twenty years that here you are after all1 you will be rather sorry you did not do as ,i say4 ,and if ,i find myself dying at the end of six months'8 ,you will thank ,god for those six months4 ,the whole thing1 my dear fellow1 is a want of faith in ,god4 ,i do not doubt you think you are doing right1 but1 ,i repeat1 the whole thing comes from want of faith in ,god4 ,you will take things into your own hands1 and order them after a preventive and self-protective fashion1 lest ,god should have ordained the worst for you1 which worst1 after all1 would be best met by doing his will without inquiry into the future2 and which worst is no evil4 ,death is no more an evil than marriage is4 ,but you don't see it as ,i do1 persisted the blacksmith4 ,of course ,i don't4 ,i think you see it as it is not4 ,he remained silent for a little4 ,a shower of spray fell upon us4 ,he started4 ,what a wave6 he cried4 ,that spray came over the top of the rock4 ,we shall have to run for it4 ,i fancied that he only wanted to avoid further conversation4 ,there's no hurry1 ,i said4 ,it was high water an hour and a half ago4 ,you don't know this coast1 sir1 returned he1 or you wouldn't talk like that4 ,as he spoke he rose1 and going from under the shelter of the rock1 looked along4 ,for ,god's sake1 ,aggy6 he cried in terror1 come at once4 ,every other wave be rushing across the breakwater as if it was on the level4 ,so saying1 he hurried back1 caught her by the hand1 and began to draw her along4 ,hadn't we better stay where we are8 ,i suggested4 ,if you can stand the night in the cold4 ,but ,aggy here is delicate2 and ,i don't care about being out all night4 ,it's not the tide1 sir2 it's a ground swell--from a storm somewhere out at sea4 ,that never asks no questions about tide or no tide4 ,come along1 then1 ,i said4 ,but just wait one minute more4 ,it is better to be ready for the worst4 ,for ,i remembered that the day before ,i had seen a crowbar lying among the stones1 and ,i thought it might be useful4 ,in a moment or two ,i had found it1 and returning1 gave it to ,joe4 ,then ,i took the girl's disengaged hand4 ,she thanked me in a voice perfectly calm and firm4 ,joe took the bar in haste1 and drew ,agnes towards the breakwater4 ,any real thought of danger had not yet crossed my mind4 ,but when ,i looked along the outstretched back of the mole1 and saw a dim sheet of white sweep across it1 ,i felt that there was ground for his anxiety1 and prepared myself for a struggle4 ,do you know what to do with the crowbar1 ,joe8 ,i said1 grasping my own stout oak-stick more firmly4 ,perfectly1 answered ,joe4 ,to stick between the stones and hold on4 ,we must watch our time between the waves4 ,you take the command1 then1 ,joe1 ,i returned4 ,you see better than ,i do1 and you know the ways of that raging wild beast there better than ,i do4 ,i will obey orders--one of which1 no doubt1 will be1 not for wind or sea to lose hold of ,agnes--eh1 ,joe8 ,joe gave a grim enough laugh in reply1 and we started1 he carrying his crowbar in his right hand towards the advancing sea1 and ,i my oak-stick in my left towards the still water within4 ,quick march6 said ,joe1 and away we went out on the breakwater4 ,now the back of the breakwater was very rugged1 for it was formed of huge stones1 with wide gaps between1 where the waters had washed out the cement1 and worn their edges4 ,but what impeded our progress secured our safety4 ,halt6 cried ,joe1 when we were yet but a few yards beyond the shelter of the rocks4 ,there's a topper coming4 ,we halted at the word of command1 as a huge wave1 with combing crest1 rushed against the far out-sloping base of the mole1 and flung its heavy top right over the middle of the mass1 a score or two of yards in front of us4 ,now for it6 cried ,joe4 ,run6 ,we did run4 ,in my mind there was just sense enough of danger to add to the pleasure of the excitement4 ,i did not know how much danger there was4 ,over the rough worn stones we sped stumbling4 ,halt6 cried the smith once more1 and we did halt2 but this time1 as it turned out1 in the middle front of the coming danger4 ,god be with us6 ,i exclaimed1 when the huge billow showed itself through the night1 rushing towards the mole4 ,the smith stuck his crowbar between two great stones4 ,to this he held on with one hand1 and threw the other arm round ,agnes's waist4 ,i1 too1 had got my oak firmly fixed1 held on with one hand1 and threw the other arm round ,agnes4 ,it took but a moment4 ,now then6 cried ,joe4 ,here she comes6 ,hold on1 sir4 ,hold on1 ,aggy6 ,but when ,i saw the height of the water1 as it rushed on us up the sloping side of the mound1 ,i cried out in my turn1 ,down1 ,joe6 ,down on your face1 and let it over us easy6 ,down ,agnes6 ,they obeyed4 ,we threw ourselves across the breakwater1 with our heads to the coming foe1 and ,i grasped my stick close to the stones with all the power of a hand that was then strong4 ,over us burst the mighty wave1 floating us up from the stones where we lay4 ,but we held on1 the wave passed1 and we sprung gasping to our feet4 ,now1 now6 cried ,joe and ,i together1 and1 heavy as we were1 with the water pouring from us1 we flew across the remainder of the heap1 and arrived1 panting and safe1 at the other end1 ere one wave more had swept the surface4 ,the moment we were in safety we turned and looked back over the danger we had traversed4 ,it was to see a huge billow sweep the breakwater from end to end4 ,we looked at each other for a moment without speaking4 ,i believe1 sir1 said ,joe at length1 with slow and solemn speech1 if you hadn't taken the command at that moment we should all have been lost4 ,it seems likely enough1 when ,i look back on it4 ,for one thing1 ,i was not sure that my stick would stand1 so ,i thought ,i had better grasp it low down4 ,we were awfully near death1 said ,joe4 ,nearer than you thought1 ,joe2 and yet we escaped it4 ,things don't go all as we fancy1 you see4 ,faith is as essential to manhood as foresight--believe me1 ,joe4 ,it is very absurd to trust ,god for the future1 and not trust him for the present4 ,the man who is not anxious is the man most likely to do the right thing4 ,he is cool and collected and ready4 ,our ,lord therefore told his disciples that when they should be brought before kings and rulers1 they were to take no thought what answer they should make1 for it would be given them when the time came4 ,we were climbing the steep path up to the downs4 ,neither of my companions spoke4 ,you have escaped one death together1 ,i said at length3 dare another4 ,still neither of them returned an answer4 ,when we came near the parsonage1 ,i said1 ,now1 ,joe1 you must go in and get to bed at once4 ,i will take ,agnes home4 ,you can trust me not to say anything against you8 ,joe laughed rather hoarsely1 and replied3 ,as you please1 sir4 ,good night1 ,aggie4 ,mind you get to bed as fast as you can4 ,when ,i returned from giving ,agnes over to her parents1 ,i made haste to change my clothes1 and put on my warm dressing-gown4 ,i may as well mention at once1 that not one of us was the worse for our ducking4 ,i then went up to ,connie's room4 ,here ,i am1 you see1 ,connie1 quite safe4 ,i've been lying listening to every blast of wind since you went out1 papa4 ,but all ,i could do was to trust in ,god4 ,do you call that all1 ,connie8 ,believe me1 there is more power in that than any human being knows the tenth part of yet4 ,it is indeed all4 ,i said no more then4 ,i told my wife about it that night1 but we were well into another month before ,i told ,connie4 ,when ,i left her1 ,i went to ,joe's room to see how he was1 and found him having some gruel4 ,i sat down on the edge of his bed1 and said1 ,well1 ,joe1 this is better than under water4 ,i hope you won't be the worse for it4 ,i don't much care what comes of me1 sir4 ,it will be all over soon4 ,but you ought to care what comes of you1 ,joe4 ,i will tell you why4 ,you are an instrument out of which ought to come praise to ,god1 and1 therefore1 you ought to care for the instrument4 ,that way1 yes1 sir1 ,i ought4 ,and you have no business to be like some children who say1 ',mamma won't give me so and so1' instead of asking her to give it them4 ,i see what you mean1 sir4 ,but really you put me out before the young woman4 ,i couldn't say before her what ,i meant4 ,suppose1 you know1 sir1 there was to come a family4 ,it might be1 you know4 ,of course4 ,what else would you have8 ,but if ,i was to die1 where would she be then8 ,in ,god's hands2 just as she is now4 ,but ,i ought to take care that she is not left with a burden like that to provide for4 ,o1 ,joe6 how little you know a woman's heart6 ,it would just be the greatest comfort she could have for losing you--that's all4 ,many a woman has married a man she did not care enough for1 just that she might have a child of her own to let out her heart upon4 ,i don't say that is right1 you know4 ,such love cannot be perfect4 ,a woman ought to love her child because it is her husband's more than because it is her own1 and because it is ,god's more than either's4 ,i saw in the papers the other day1 that a woman was brought before the ,recorder of ,london for stealing a baby1 when the judge himself said that there was no imaginable motive for her action but a motherly passion to possess the child4 ,it is the need of a child that makes so many women take to poor miserable1 broken-nosed lap-dogs2 for they are self-indulgent1 and cannot face the troubles and dangers of adopting a child4 ,they would if they might get one of a good family1 or from a respectable home2 but they dare not take an orphan out of the dirt1 lest it should spoil their silken chairs4 ,but that has nothing to do with our argument4 ,what ,i mean is this1 that if ,agnes really loves you1 as no one can look in her face and doubt1 she will be far happier if you leave her a child--yes1 she will be happier if you only leave her your name for hers--than if you died without calling her your wife4 ,i took ,joe's basin from him1 and he lay down4 ,he turned his face to the wall4 ,i waited a moment1 but finding him silent1 bade him good-night1 and left the room4 ,a month after1 ,i married them4 ,,chapter ,,xiii4 ,,the ,,harvest4 ,it was some time before we got the bells to work to our mind1 but at last we succeeded4 ,the worst of it was to get the cranks1 which at first required strong pressure on the keys1 to work easily enough4 ,but neither ,joe nor his cousin spared any pains to perfect the attempt1 and1 as ,i say1 at length we succeeded4 ,i took ,wynnie down to the instrument and made her try whether she could not do something1 and she succeeded in making the old tower discourse loudly and eloquently4 ,by this time the thanksgiving for the harvest was at hand3 on the morning of that first of all would ,i summon the folk to their prayers with the sound of the full peal4 ,and ,i wrote a little hymn of praise to the ,god of the harvest1 modelling it to one of the oldest tunes in that part of the country1 and ,i had it printed on slips of paper and laid plentifully on the benches4 ,what with the calling of the bells1 like voices in the highway1 and the solemn meditation of the organ within to bear aloft the thoughts of those who heard1 and came to the prayer and thanksgiving in common1 and the message which ,god had given me to utter to them1 ,i hoped that we should indeed keep holiday4 ,wynnie summoned the parish with the hundredth psalm pealed from aloft1 dropping from the airy regions of the tower on village and hamlet and cottage1 calling aloud--for who could dissociate the words from the music1 though the words are in the ,scotch psalms8--written none the less by an ,englishman1 however ,english wits may amuse themselves with laughing at their quaintness--calling aloud1 ,all people that on earth do dwell ,sing to the ,lord with cheerful voice2 ,him serve with mirth1 his praise forth tell-- ,come ye before him and rejoice4 ,then we sang the psalm before the communion service1 making bold in the name of the ,lord to serve him with mirth as in the old version1 and not with the fear with which some editor1 weak in faith1 has presumed to alter the line4 ,then before the sermon we sang the hymn ,i had prepared--a proceeding justifiable by many an example in the history of the church while she was not only able to number singers amongst her clergy1 but those singers were capable of influencing the whole heart and judgment of the nation with their songs4 ,ethelwyn played the organ4 ,the song ,i had prepared was this3 ,we praise the ,life of ,all2 ,from buried seeds so small ,who makes the ordered ranks of autumn stand2 ,who stores the corn ,in rick and barn ,to feed the winter of the land4 ,we praise the ,life of ,light6 ,who from the brooding night ,draws out the morning holy1 calm1 and grand2 ,veils up the moon1 ,sends out the sun1 ,to glad the face of all the land4 ,we praise the ,life of ,work1 ,who from sleep's lonely dark ,leads forth his children to arise and stand1 ,then go their way1 ,the live-long day1 ,to trust and labour in the land4 ,we praise the ,life of ,good1 ,who breaks sin's lazy mood1 ,toilsomely ploughing up the fruitless sand4 ,the furrowed waste ,they leave1 and haste ,home1 home1 to till their ,father's land4 ,we praise the ,life of ,life1 ,who in this soil of strife ,casts us at birth1 like seed from sower's hand2 ,to die and so ,like corn to grow ,a golden harvest in his land4 ,after we had sung this hymn1 the meaning of which is far better than the versification1 ,i preached from the words of ,st4 ,paul1 ,if by any means ,i might attain unto the resurrection of the dead4 ,not as though ,i had already attained1 either were already perfect4 ,and this is something like what ,i said to them3 ,the world1 my friends1 is full of resurrections1 and it is not always of the same resurrection that ,st4 ,paul speaks4 ,every night that folds us up in darkness is a death2 and those of you that have been out early and have seen the first of the dawn1 will know it--the day rises out of the night like a being that has burst its tomb and escaped into life4 ,that you may feel that the sunrise is a resurrection--the word resurrection just means a rising again--,i will read you a little description of it from a sermon by a great writer and great preacher called ,jeremy ,taylor4 ,listen4 ',but as when the sun approaching towards the gates of the morning1 he first opens a little eye of heaven and sends away the spirits of darkness1 and gives light to a cock1 and calls up the lark to matins1 and by and by gilds the fringes of a cloud1 and peeps over the eastern hills1 thrusting out his golden horns like those which decked the brows of ,moses1 when he was forced to wear a veil1 because himself had seen the face of ,god2 and still1 while a man tells the story1 the sun gets up higher1 till he shows a fair face and a full light1 and then he shines one whole day1 under a cloud often1 and sometimes weeping great and little showers1 and sets quickly2 so is a man's reason and his life4' ,is not this a resurrection of the day out of the night8 ,or hear how ,milton makes his ,adam and ,eve praise ,god in the morning1-- ',ye mists and exhalations that now rise ,from hill or streaming lake1 dusky or gray1 ,till the sun paint your fleecy skirts with gold1 ,in honour to the world's great ,author rise1 ,whether to deck with clouds the uncoloured sky1 ,or wet the thirsty earth with falling showers1 ,rising or falling still advance his praise4' ,but it is yet more of a resurrection to you4 ,think of your own condition through the night and in the morning4 ,you die1 as it were1 every night4 ,the death of darkness comes down over the earth2 but a deeper death1 the death of sleep1 descends on you4 ,a power overshadows you2 your eyelids close1 you cannot keep them open if you would2 your limbs lie moveless2 the day is gone2 your whole life is gone2 you have forgotten everything2 an evil man might come and do with your goods as he pleased2 you are helpless4 ,but the ,god of the ,resurrection is awake all the time1 watching his sleeping men and women1 even as a mother who watches her sleeping baby1 only with larger eyes and more full of love than hers2 and so1 you know not how1 all at once you know that you are what you are2 that there is a world that wants you outside of you1 and a ,god that wants you inside of you2 you rise from the death of sleep1 not by your own power1 for you knew nothing about it2 ,god put his hand over your eyes1 and you were dead2 he lifted his hand and breathed light on you and you rose from the dead1 thanked the ,god who raised you up1 and went forth to do your work4 ,from darkness to light2 from blindness to seeing2 from knowing nothing to looking abroad on the mighty world2 from helpless submission to willing obedience1--is not this a resurrection indeed8 ,that ,st4 ,paul saw it to be such may be shown from his using the two things with the same meaning when he says1 ',awake1 thou that sleepest1 and arise from the dead1 and ,christ shall give thee light4' ,no doubt he meant a great deal more4 ,no man who understands what he is speaking about can well mean only one thing at a time4 ,but to return to the resurrections we see around us in nature4 ,look at the death that falls upon the world in winter4 ,and look how it revives when the sun draws near enough in the spring to wile the life in it once more out of its grave4 ,see how the pale1 meek snowdrops come up with their bowed heads1 as if full of the memory of the fierce winds they encountered last spring1 and yet ready in the strength of their weakness to encounter them again4 ,up comes the crocus1 bringing its gold safe from the dark of its colourless grave into the light of its parent gold4 ,primroses1 and anemones1 and blue-bells1 and a thousand other children of the spring1 hear the resurrection-trumpet of the wind from the west and south1 obey1 and leave their graves behind to breathe the air of the sweet heavens4 ,up and up they come till the year is glorious with the rose and the lily1 till the trees are not only clothed upon with new garments of loveliest green1 but the fruit-tree bringeth forth its fruit1 and the little children of men are made glad with apples1 and cherries1 and hazel-nuts4 ,the earth laughs out in green and gold4 ,the sky shares in the grand resurrection4 ,the garments of its mourning1 wherewith it made men sad1 its clouds of snow and hail and stormy vapours1 are swept away1 have sunk indeed to the earth1 and are now humbly feeding the roots of the flowers whose dead stalks they beat upon all the winter long4 ,instead1 the sky has put on the garments of praise4 ,her blue1 coloured after the sapphire-floor on which stands the throne of him who is the ,resurrection and the ,life1 is dashed and glorified with the pure white of sailing clouds1 and at morning and evening prayer1 puts on colours in which the human heart drowns itself with delight--green and gold and purple and rose4 ,even the icebergs floating about in the lonely summer seas of the north are flashing all the glories of the rainbow4 ,but1 indeed1 is not this whole world itself a monument of the ,resurrection8 ,the earth was without form and void4 ,the wind of ,god moved on the face of the waters1 and up arose this fair world4 ,darkness was on the face of the deep3 ,god said1 ',let there be light1' and there was light4 ,in the animal world as well1 you behold the goings of the ,resurrection4 ,plainest of all1 look at the story of the butterfly--so plain that the pagan ,greeks called it and the soul by one name--,psyche4 ,psyche meant with them a butterfly or the soul1 either4 ,look how the creeping thing1 ugly to our eyes1 so that we can hardly handle it without a shudder1 finding itself growing sick with age1 straightway falls a spinning and weaving at its own shroud1 coffin1 and grave1 all in one--to prepare1 in fact1 for its resurrection2 for it is for the sake of the resurrection that death exists4 ,patiently it spins its strength1 but not its life1 away1 folds itself up decently1 that its body may rest in quiet till the new body is formed within it2 and at length when the appointed hour has arrived1 out of the body of this crawling thing breaks forth the winged splendour of the butterfly--not the same body--a new one built out of the ruins of the old--even as ,st4 ,paul tells us that it is not the same body we have in the resurrection1 but a nobler body like ourselves1 with all the imperfect and evil thing taken away4 ,no more creeping for the butterfly2 wings of splendour now4 ,neither yet has it lost the feet wherewith to alight on all that is lovely and sweet4 ,think of it--up from the toilsome journey over the low ground1 exposed to the foot of every passer-by1 destroying the lovely leaves upon which it fed1 and the fruit which they should shelter1 up to the path at will through the air1 and a gathering of food which hurts not the source of it1 a food which is but as a tribute from the loveliness of the flowers to the yet higher loveliness of the flower-angel3 is not this a resurrection8 ,its children too shall pass through the same process1 to wing the air of a summer noon1 and rejoice in the ethereal and the pure4 ,to return yet again from the human thoughts suggested by the symbol of the butterfly-- ,here let me pause for a moment--and there was a corresponding pause1 though but momentary1 in the sermon as ,i spoke it--to mention a curious1 and to me at the moment an interesting fact4 ,at this point of my address1 ,i caught sight of a white butterfly1 a belated one1 flitting about the church4 ,absorbed for a moment1 my eye wandered after it4 ,it was near the bench where my own people sat1 and1 for one flash of thought1 ,i longed that the butterfly would alight on my ,wynnie1 for ,i was more anxious about her resurrection at the time than about anything else4 ,but the butterfly would not4 ,and then ,i told myself that ,god would1 and that the butterfly was only the symbol of a grand truth1 and of no private interpretation1 to make which of it was both selfishness and superstition4 ,but all this passed in a flash1 and ,i resumed my discourse4 --,i come now naturally to speak of what we commonly call the ,resurrection4 ,some say3 ',how can the same dust be raised again1 when it may be scattered to the winds of heaven8' ,it is a question ,i hardly care to answer4 ,the mere difficulty can in reason stand for nothing with ,god2 but the apparent worthlessness of the supposition renders the question uninteresting to me4 ,what is of import is1 that ,i should stand clothed upon1 with a body which is my body because it serves my ends1 justifies my consciousness of identity by being1 in all that was good in it1 like that which ,i had before1 while now it is tenfold capable of expressing the thoughts and feelings that move within me4 ,how can ,i care whether the atoms that form a certain inch of bone should be the same as those which formed that bone when ,i died8 ,all my life-time ,i never felt or thought of the existence of such a bone6 ,on the other hand1 ,i object to having the same worn muscles1 the same shrivelled skin with which ,i may happen to die4 ,why give me the same body as that8 ,why not rather my youthful body1 which was strong1 and facile1 and capable8 ,the matter in the muscle of my arm at death would not serve to make half the muscle ,i had when young4 ,but ,i thank ,god that ,st4 ,paul says it will not be the same body4 ,that body dies--up springs another body4 ,i suspect myself that those are right who say that this body being the seed1 the moment it dies in the soil of this world1 that moment is the resurrection of the new body4 ,the life in it rises out of it in a new body4 ,this is not after it is put in the mere earth2 for it is dead then1 and the germ of life gone out of it4 ,if a seed rots1 no new body comes of it4 ,the seed dies into a new life1 and so does man4 ,dying and rotting are two very different things4--,but ,i am not sure by any means4 ,as ,i say1 the whole question is rather uninteresting to me4 ,what do ,i care about my old clothes after ,i have done with them8 ,what is it to me to know what becomes of an old coat or an old pulpit gown8 ,i have no such clinging to the flesh4 ,it seems to me that people believe their bodies to be themselves1 and are therefore very anxious about them--and no wonder then4 ,enough for me that ,i shall have eyes to see my friends1 a face that they shall know me by1 and a mouth to praise ,god withal4 ,i leave the matter with one remark1 that ,i am well content to rise as ,jesus rose1 however that was4 ,for me the will of ,god is so good that ,i would rather have his will done than my own choice given me4 ,but ,i now come to the last1 because infinitely the most important part of my subject--the resurrection for the sake of which all the other resurrections exist--the resurrection unto ,life4 ,this is the one of which ,st4 ,paul speaks in my text4 ,this is the one ,i am most anxious--indeed1 the only one ,i am anxious to set forth1 and impress upon you4 ,think1 then1 of all the deaths you know2 the death of the night1 when the sun is gone1 when friend says not a word to friend1 but both lie drowned and parted in the sea of sleep2 the death of the year1 when winter lies heavy on the graves of the children of summer1 when the leafless trees moan in the blasts from the ocean1 when the beasts even look dull and oppressed1 when the children go about shivering with cold1 when the poor and improvident are miserable with suffering or think of such a death of disease as befalls us at times1 when the man who says1 ',would ,god it were morning6' changes but his word1 and not his tune1 when the morning comes1 crying1 ',would ,god it were evening6' when what life is left is known to us only by suffering1 and hope is amongst the things that were once and are no more--think of all these1 think of them all together1 and you will have but the dimmest1 faintest picture of the death from which the resurrection of which ,i have now to speak1 is the rising4 ,i shrink from the attempt1 knowing how weak words are to set forth the death1 set forth the resurrection4 ,were ,i to sit down to yonder organ1 and crash out the most horrible dissonances that ever took shape in sound1 ,i should give you but a weak figure of this death2 were ,i capable of drawing from many a row of pipes an exhalation of dulcet symphonies and voices sweet1 such as ,milton himself could have invaded our ears withal1 ,i could give you but a faint figure of this resurrection4 ,nevertheless1 ,i must try what ,i can do in my own way4 ,if into the face of the dead body1 lying on the bed1 waiting for its burial1 the soul of the man should begin to dawn again1 drawing near from afar to look out once more at those eyes1 to smile once again through those lips1 the change on that face would be indeed great and wondrous1 but nothing for marvel or greatness to that which passes on the countenance1 the very outward bodily face of the man who wakes from his sleep1 arises from the dead and receives light from ,christ4 ,too often indeed1 the reposeful look on the face of the dead body would be troubled1 would vanish away at the revisiting of the restless ghost2 but when a man's own right true mind1 which ,god made in him1 is restored to him again1 and he wakes from the death of sin1 then comes the repose without the death4 ,it may take long for the new spirit to complete the visible change1 but it begins at once1 and will be perfected4 ,the bloated look of self-indulgence passes away like the leprosy of ,naaman1 the cheek grows pure1 the lips return to the smile of hope instead of the grin of greed1 and the eyes that made innocence shrink and shudder with their yellow leer grow childlike and sweet and faithful4 ,the mammon-eyes1 hitherto fixed on the earth1 are lifted to meet their kind2 the lips that mumbled over figures and sums of gold learn to say words of grace and tenderness4 ,the truculent1 repellent1 self-satisfied face begins to look thoughtful and doubtful1 as if searching for some treasure of whose whereabouts it had no certain sign4 ,the face anxious1 wrinkled1 peering1 troubled1 on whose lines you read the dread of hunger1 poverty1 and nakedness1 thaws into a smile2 the eyes reflect in courage the light of the ,father's care1 the back grows erect under its burden with the assurance that the hairs of its head are all numbered4 ,but the face can with all its changes set but dimly forth the rising from the dead which passes within4 ,the heart1 which cared but for itself1 becomes aware of surrounding thousands like itself1 in the love and care of which it feels a dawning blessedness undreamt of before4 ,from selfishness to love--is not this a rising from the dead8 ,the man whose ambition declares that his way in the world would be to subject everything to his desires1 to bring every human care1 affection1 power1 and aspiration to his feet--such a world it would be1 and such a king it would have1 if individual ambition might work its will6 if a man's opinion of himself could be made out in the world1 degrading1 compelling1 oppressing1 doing everything for his own glory6--and such a glory6--but a pang of light strikes this man to the heart2 an arrow of truth1 feathered with suffering and loss and dismay1 finds out--the open joint in his armour1 ,i was going to say--no1 finds out the joint in the coffin where his heart lies festering in a death so dead that itself calls it life4 ,he trembles1 he awakes1 he rises from the dead4 ,no more he seeks the slavery of all3 where can he find whom to serve8 how can he become if but a threshold in the temple of ,christ1 where all serve all1 and no man thinks first of himself8 ,he to whom the mass of his fellows1 as he massed them1 was common and unclean1 bows before every human sign of the presence of the making ,god4 ,the sun1 which was to him but a candle with which to search after his own ends1 wealth1 power1 place1 praise--the world1 which was but the cavern where he thus searched--are now full of the mystery of loveliness1 full of the truth of which sun and wind and land and sea are symbols and signs4 ,from a withered old age of unbelief1 the dim eyes of which refuse the glory of things a passage to the heart1 he is raised up a child full of admiration1 wonder1 and gladness4 ,everything is glorious to him2 he can believe1 and therefore he sees4 ,it is from the grave into the sunshine1 from the night into the morning1 from death into life4 ,to come out of the ugly into the beautiful2 out of the mean and selfish into the noble and loving2 out of the paltry into the great2 out of the false into the true2 out of the filthy into the clean2 out of the commonplace into the glorious2 out of the corruption of disease into the fine vigour and gracious movements of health2 in a word1 out of evil into good--is not this a resurrection indeed--the resurrection of all1 the resurrection of ,life8 ,god grant that with ,st4 ,paul we may attain to this resurrection of the dead4 ,this rising from the dead is often a long and a painful process4 ,even after he had preached the gospel to the ,gentiles1 and suffered much for the sake of his ,master1 ,paul sees the resurrection of the dead towering grandly before him1 not yet climbed1 not yet attained unto--a mountainous splendour and marvel1 still shining aloft in the air of existence1 still1 thank ,god1 to be attained1 but ever growing in height and beauty as1 forgetting those things that are behind1 he presses towards the mark1 if by any means he may attain to the resurrection of the dead4 ,every blessed moment in which a man bethinks himself that he has been forgetting his high calling1 and sends up to the ,father a prayer for aid2 every time a man resolves that what he has been doing he will do no more2 every time that the love of ,god1 or the feeling of the truth1 rouses a man to look first up at the light1 then down at the skirts of his own garments--that moment a divine resurrection is wrought in the earth4 ,yea1 every time that a man passes from resentment to forgiveness1 from cruelty to compassion1 from hardness to tenderness1 from indifference to carefulness1 from selfishness to honesty1 from honesty to generosity1 from generosity to love1--a resurrection1 the bursting of a fresh bud of life out of the grave of evil1 gladdens the eye of the ,father watching his children4 ,awake1 then1 thou that sleepest1 and arise from the dead1 and ,christ will give thee light4 ,as the harvest rises from the wintry earth1 so rise thou up from the trials of this world a full ear in the harvest of ,him who sowed thee in the soil that thou mightest rise above it4 ,as the summer rises from the winter1 so rise thou from the cares of eating and drinking and clothing into the fearless sunshine of confidence in the ,father4 ,as the morning rises out of the night1 so rise thou from the darkness of ignorance to do the will of ,god in the daylight2 and as a man feels that he is himself when he wakes from the troubled and grotesque visions of the night into the glory of the sunrise1 even so wilt thou feel that then first thou knowest what thy life1 the gladness of thy being1 is4 ,as from painful tossing in disease1 rise into the health of well-being4 ,as from the awful embrace of thy own dead body1 burst forth in thy spiritual body4 ,arise thou1 responsive to the indwelling will of the ,father1 even as thy body will respond to thy indwelling soul4 ',white wings are crossing2 ,glad waves are tossing2 ,the earth flames out in crimson and green3 ,spring is appearing1 ,summer is nearing-- ,where hast thou been8 ,down in some cavern1 ,death's sleepy tavern1 ,housing1 carousing with spectres of night8 ,the trumpet is pealing ,sunshine and healing-- ,spring to the light4' ,with this quotation from a friend's poem1 ,i closed my sermon1 oppressed with a sense of failure2 for ever the marvel of simple awaking1 the mere type of the resurrection eluded all my efforts to fix it in words4 ,i had to comfort myself with the thought that ,god is so strong that he can work even with our failures4 ,,end ,,of ,,vol4 ,,ii4