,transcriber's ,note ,in the following transcription1 italic text is denoted by underscores while bold text is denoted by equal signs4 ,small capitals in the original text have been transcribed as ,,all ,,capitals4 ,see end of this document for details of corrections and other changes4 ---------------------------- ,start of ,book ---------------------------- ,illustration3 ,,rear ,,view ,,of ,,the ,,statue ,,of ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,,in ,,floral ,,park ,,city1 ,,florida ,note the manner in which the sculptress denotes motion and vibration by the addition of the stump1 which expresses with one bold stroke the action of the subject in rising from meditation4 ,visitors to ,floral ,park ,city are advised to walk all around the statue in order to get these different expressions of mood4 ,,the ,,collector',s ,,whatnot ,a ,compendium1 ,manual1 and ,syllabus of ,information and ,advice on all ,subjects ,appertaining to the ,collection of ,antiques1 both ,ancient and not so ,ancient ,compiled by ,,cornelius ,,obenchain ,,van ,,loot1 ,,milton ,,kilgallen ,,and ,,murgatroyd ,,elphinstone ,illustration ,boston and ,new ,york ,houghton ,mifflin ,company ,the ,riverside ,press ,cambridge ,,copyright1 #aibc1 ,,by ,,houghton ,,mifflin ,,company ,,all ,,rights ,,reserved ,the ,first ,edition of ,the ,collector's ,whatnot consists of #cabg copies1 as follows3 ,twenty-seven on choicest domestic leaf1 bound in teakwood1 with leather hinges1 numbered ,a to 1 with the ,authors' thumb-prints in red ink in each copy4 ,three thousand one hundred copies on ,american antique wove1 bound in manila boards4 ,the ,second ,edition consists of one thousand pure and pink copies1 bound to sell4 ,the ,riverside ,press ,,cambridge ,,massachusetts ,,printed ,,in ,,the ,u4,s4,a4 ,to ,the ,resigned ,husbands and ,wives of ,all ,true ,collectors ,this ,book is most feelingly ,,dedicated ,illustration ,,preface ,the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities was formed on ,february #ad1 #aiaa1 by ,eben ,s4 ,twitchett1 ,b4,b4,s41 ,cornelius ,obenchain ,van ,loot1 ,d4,a41 ,c4,o4,j41 ,raymond ,l4 ,pry1 ,a4,b41 ,a4,m41 ,s4,i4,w41 and ,professor ,milton ,kilgallen1 ,f4,r4,s41 of ,balliol ,college4 ,the present volume is largely made up of the papers delivered by these distinguished pedants before their equally distinguished society4 ,the #adth of ,february is a red-letter day in the history of antiques and antiqueing2 for the exhaustive researches and diligent labors of the members of the ,academy have not only awakened untold numbers of people to the refining value of something really old1 but have cleared up those highly important moot points2 that is1 when does a thing cease to be merely old and become an antique2 and when is an antique not an antique8 ,one of the finest contributions to the literature of antiques1 for example1 was ,dr4 ,pry's masterly monograph on ,chisel ,markings and ,screw-,driver ,scratches of the ,lower ,connecticut ,valley 7,bulletin of the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities1 ,vol4 ,,iv1 ,no4 #g1 pp4 #cfhb et seq474 ,in this monograph ,dr4 ,pry pointed out that an old ,colonial frying-pan was a genuine antique1 worthy of being used as the central object in a modern mantel-ornament grouping4 ,the workmanship1 the artistry1 the incomparable grace of a genuine ,de ,ruyter frying-pan puts it in the same class with a great painting or a great ruin4 ,a ,de ,ruyter frying-pan in first-class shape is1 in fact1 infinitely preferable to some great ruins1 especially if the ruins come under the head of third-class ruins4 ,on the other hand1 a genuine ,oppendink frying-pan1 carefully made during the same year that1 say1 the ,de ,ruyter frying-pan was produced1 is worthless as an antique4 ,both are antiques1 yet one is not an antique4 ,there are some who persist in buying ,oppendink frying-pans and hanging them on the walls of their living-rooms1 alongside a beautiful old ,colonial hack-saw and a rare ,colonial egg-beater2 but their numbers1 thanks to the magnificent1 careful1 and far-reaching work of the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities1 are gradually becoming fewer4 -------- ,grasswink1 ,h4 ,q41 ,ruins3 ,brick1 ,stone1 and ,human2 ,their ,classification and ,idiosyncrasies4 ,this is only an isolated example of the ,academy's efforts4 ,its field agents have collected1 collated1 segregated1 documented1 annotated1 and filed over seventy-three hundred pounds 7,august #bh1 #aibb7 of reports on ,american-owned antiques alone4 ,some of them have undergone the most severe dangers2 while two have even made the supreme sacrifice in their pursuit of duty4 ,this tragedy cast a shadow over the entire ,academy2 for among its members there were no more ardent or well-informed students of antiques than ,judson ,f4 ,rapp1 ,litt4,d41 and ,herman ,hymen ,heller1 of ,cracow ,university4 ,the beautiful ,rapp-,heller monument1 soon to be erected either in ,washington1 ,d4,c41 or in the lonely spot in ,northern ,maine where ,dr4 ,rapp dug up the first known specimen of folding iron ,colonial camping-stool1 will represent the ,spirit of ,antiqueing in a most dignified and touching way4 ,sketches for this monument have already been prepared by ,mrs4 ,claudia ,gaines ,gumme1 the distinguished sculptress2 and the accepted sketch shows a stern-visaged ,new-,england housewife refusing to accept seven dollars from ,professor ,heller for a beautiful ,colonial cradle1 while ,dr4 ,rapp surreptitiously examines the bottom of a ladder-back chair in the shadow of a convenient highboy4 ,the details of the tragedy are probably still fresh in the minds of all antique-lovers4 ,dr4 ,rapp and ,professor ,heller1 it will be remembered1 had secured for the society a flawless specimen of early well-sweep with bucket attached4 ,they took the well-sweep and bucket to their rooms and prepared to study their treasures with the painstaking care which characterized all their efforts4 ,dr4 ,rapp was a native of ,calais1 ,maine1 and therefore had developed his ,new ,england conscience to a high degree4 ,professor ,heller1 though born in ,kishinew and educated in ,cracow1 had thoroughly absorbed the ,new ,england traditions and ideals in the nine years he had lived in ,america4 ,he often laughingly remarked that his ,new ,england conscience had become so acute that he was thinking of changing his name to ,lowell or ,fitzgerald4 ,in making a careful examination of the well-sweep with their magnifying glasses1 ,dr4 ,rapp and ,professor ,heller reached markedly different conclusions as to its age4 ,dr4 ,rapp1 as shown by the hasty notes which he jotted down at the time1 was of the opinion that it dated back to #afhc4 ,dr4 ,heller1 on the other hand1 basing his conclusions on the moss-layers at the end of the pole1 was firmly convinced that it could not have been made prior to #agfe4 ,each scientist labored for hours in the effort to win over the other to his views4 ,the arguments finally became bitter1 and eventually they attacked each other with their magnifying glasses1 which were unusually large and heavy4 ,the noise of the struggle was heard by several neighbors2 but it was not investigated1 as ,professor ,heller had long been accustomed to distil alcohol1 sampling the results as he went along1 and frequently becoming rather noisy4 ,the neighbors1 unfortunately1 thought he was sampling a new batch4 ,on the following morning1 when an attendant came to clean the ,professor's apartments1 both ,dr4 ,rapp and ,professor ,heller were dead4 ,this is a beautiful example of the devotion to a cause which characterizes the work of all the members of the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities4 ,the finest fruit of the work of the ,academy1 however1 came when it commissioned ,professor ,milton ,kilgallen1 ,f4,r4,s41 of ,balliol ,college1 to collate and edit the notes1 papers1 and reports of ,america's greatest antique-collectors for the benefit of the present and future generations4 ,the monumental labors of ,professor ,kilgallen1 which have extended over a period of seven years1 cannot1 of course1 be included in any book weighing less than seventeen pounds4 ,the ensuing work is merely a sketch or bird's-eye view of the ,professor's toil1 published in the present form by the ,academy in order that antique-lovers may1 in a few hours' reading1 obtain an idea of the vast amount of material suitable for individual research work which has been collected in the ,academy's files through the indefatigable energy and enthusiasm of ,professor ,kilgallen4 ,the ,kilgallen family has long been distinguished in the realm of ,arts and ,sciences4 ,colonel ,everard ,kilgallen1 father of ,professor ,milton ,kilgallen1 became celebrated at the age of twenty-two for his exhaustive treatise on 8,the ,seasonal ,movements of the ,potato ,bug40 ,his wife1 the beautiful ,sheila ,catherwood-,trapp1 daughter of ,sir ,almeric ,catherwood-,trapp1 ,d4,s4,o41 ,k4,c4,b41 ,f4,r4,g4,s41 was noted for her bird studies1 and particularly for her inimitable paintings of the lesser flycatcher1 on which she specialized4 ,so realistic were her paintings of the lesser flycatcher that flies have actually been observed hurriedly leaving a room in which one of these works of art was hung4 ,this accomplished couple had two sons1 ,morton and ,milton ,kilgallen4 ,both1 curiously1 were educated at ,balliol2 and both became full ,professors during the evening of the same day--,june #ba1 #aijf4 ,both sons inherited from their gifted parents the love of science and research4 ,professor ,morton ,kilgallen devoted his life to ichthyology4 ,professor ,milton ,kilgallen had planned to devote his life to entomology4 ,fortunately for all antique-lovers1 his first researches were made among the borers4 ,this chance brought him in close contact with antiques2 since it is among the antiques that many of the wood-borers seem best able to function and to express their individuality4 ,although he has never lost interest in the borers1 his early love for entomology has been abandoned in favor of his second love1 antiques4 ,he has devoted himself to the study of antiques with the enthusiasm which has always characterized the activities of the ,kilgallen family4 ,his tall1 somewhat wooden figure and his rich mahogany-colored features--due1 probably1 to his somewhat eccentric but constant use of furniture polish as a face lotion--are familiar to antique-dealers from ,odessa to ,otaru and from ,edinburgh to ,eski-,shehir4 ,his knowledge of antiques verges on the supernatural4 ,other antique-collectors cannot account for it2 but he himself ascribes it to a trimonthly subcutaneous injection of the special furniture polish from his own laboratory4 ,with the charming simplicity that always characterizes his speech and acts1 he declares that if one wishes to place himself en rapport with an ,indian1 one lives like an ,indian2 if one wishes to familiarize himself with the gorilla1 one lives the life of a gorilla as nearly as possible4 ,if1 therefore1 one wishes to become thoroughly familiar with furniture1 one must live like furniture3 that is to say1 he must think like furniture4 ,the whimsical directness and incontrovertibility of this suggestion is typical of the man2 and if we are to believe him1 it accounts for his penetrating knowledge of all sorts of furniture4 ,other collectors have tried the same system1 but most of them either went blind or lost their reason4 ,professor ,milton ,kilgallen has the largest collection of worm-holes 7in furniture1 of course1 not in the earth or other substances7 in the world4 ,in his beautiful residence on the ,maine coast is one room devoted entirely to these little miracles of patience4 ,some of them are plain1 without edging1 while others are cross-sections4 ,it is almost impossible for ,professor ,kilgallen to state from day to day how many he has in his possession2 but at the lowest estimate there are more than twelve thousand4 ,professor ,kilgallen is also an ardent collector of samples of patina1 or the polish which comes on ancient articles from constant handling and rubbing4 ,these samples range all the way from an arm of a desk-chair once used by ,savonarola to the elbow of a frock coat worn for several years by the ,honorable ,william ,j4 ,bryan1 which last he obtained with great difficulty4 ,not counting kitchen utensils and garments patinated by the ,professor himself1 he has more than #aagh specimens of patina1 which establishes a world's record for a single collection4 ,the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities counts itself fortunate to have secured the services of the world's greatest expert on antiques in the preparation of this book and in the collecting of the enormous mass of data which is always open to any member of the ,academy or to any antique-collector in good and regular standing4 ,if this book shall further the cause of antique-hunting and somewhat lighten the arduous labors of those whose lives are dedicated to finding something old to put in the house1 then the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities shall not have come into existence in vain4 ,,cornelius ,,obenchain ,,van ,,loot1 ,d4,a41 ,c4,o4,j4 ,president1 ,a4,a4,p4,a4 ,,floral ,,park ,,city1 ,,florida ,september #cj1 #aibc ,,contents ,,antiqueing ,,ahead1 ,,by ,,eben ,s4 ,,twitchett1 ,b4,b4,s41 ,f4,a4,a4,p4,a41 ,,etc4 #a ,,hints ,,for ,,buying ,,from ,,original ,,sources1 ,,by ,,cecilia ,,lefingwell ,,prynne 7,,mrs4 ,g,,tz7 #bi ,,the ,,secret ,,of ,,success1 ,,by ,,murgatroyd ,,elphinstone1 ,a4,b41 ,a4,m41 ,f4,r4,f4,h4,a41 ,,lecturer ,,on ,,scrollwork ,,and ,,frets ,,at ,,sinsabaugh ,,university1 #aiag-ah #ci ,,old ,,rugs1 ,,old ,,iron1 ,,old ,,brass1 ,,old ,,glass3 ,a ,,brief ,,brochure ,,on ,,the ,,search ,,for ,,the ,,antique ,,by ,a ,,professional1 ,,jared ,p4 ,,kilgallen1 ,j4,d4 ,,and ,r4,p4 #fa ,,the ,,european ,,field1 ,,by ,,professor ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 #gg ,,horsechestnut #aac ,a ,,word ,,on ,,pooning1 ,,by ,,augustula ,,thomas #acc ,,list ,,of ,,plates ,,and ,,other ,,illustrations ,,rear ,,view ,,of ,,the ,,statue ,,of ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,,in ,,floral ,,park ,,city1 ,,florida ,frontispiece ,,plate ,i3 ,,old ,,dutch ,,ovenside ,,chair ,,with ,,the ,,rare ,,pretzel ,,back #d ,,pair ,,of ,,wonderful ,,old ,,french ,,statuettes ,,now ,,the ,,property ,,of ,,dr4 ,,twitchett #aj ,,plate ,,ii3 ,,magnificent ,,old ,,flat-,,front ,,early ,,new ,,jersey ,,sideboard ,,discovered ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,,in ,,an ,,obscure ,,part ,,of ,,newark #ah ,,plate ,,iii3 ,,from ,,professor ,,kilgallen',s ,,collection ,,of ,,beautiful ,,old ,,wood-,,carvings3 ,,figure ,,of ,,pocahontas2 ,,believed ,,to ,,be ,,the ,,work ,,of ,,john ,,alden #bf ,,old ,,new ,,england ,,print ,,of ,,the ,,first ,,meeting ,,of ,,the ,,american ,,academy ,,for ,,the ,,popularization ,,of ,,antiquities #cb ,,statue ,,erected ,,to ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,,in ,,floral ,,park ,,city1 ,,florida1 ,,by ,,grateful ,,citizens ,,of ,,that ,,community #db ,,plate ,,iv3 ,,priceless ,,bit ,,of ,,old ,,staffordshire ,,ware 7,a ,,paper-,,weight7 ,,collected ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen #ej ,,plate ,v3 ,,rare ,,bit ,,of ,,old ,,worcestershire ,,ware #eh ,,dr4 ,,twitchett ,,and ,,mrs4 ,,augustula ,,thomas',s ,,husband 7,,mr4 ,,thomas7 ,,wearing ,,the ,,insignia ,,of ,,full ,,members ,,of ,,the ,,american ,,academy ,,for ,,the ,,popularization ,,of ,,antiquities #fd ,,the ,,glass ,,perfect #fh ,,plate ,,vi3 ,,old ,,skipworth ,,ware3 ,,dog ,,on ,,paper-,,weight #gd ,,plate ,,vii3 ,,professor ,,kilgallen',s ,,magnificent ,,collection ,,of ,,early ,,american ,,utensils1 ,,all ,,hand-,,wrought1 ,,and ,,some ,,obtained ,,from ,,the ,,descendants ,,of ,,the ,,families ,,in ,,which ,,the ,,articles ,,had ,,been ,,handed ,,down ,,from ,,father ,,to ,,son #hj ,,plate ,,viii3 ,,colonial ,,trigle-,,stool1 ,,discovered ,,in ,a ,,new ,,hampshire ,,woodshed1 ,,and ,,purchased ,,for ,a ,,mere ,,song ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen #hf ,,plate ,,ix3 ,,cologne ,,cathedral ,,as ,,it ,,is ,,to-,,day #id ,,plate ,x3 ,,new ,,design ,,for ,,cologne ,,cathedral #id ,,plate ,,xi3 ,,colonial ,,kitchen ,,sink ,,from ,,the ,,old ,,palaver ,,thompson ,,mansion ,,in ,,haverhill #ajb ,,plate ,,xii3 ,,sampler ,,in ,,the ,,possession ,,of ,,professor ,,kilgallen',s ,,family #aaj ,,the ,,porte-,,chapeaux ,,of ,,noisette ,,cheval3 8,,rising ,,in ,,the ,,night1 ,,trouble ,,over ,,the ,,yearning ,,of ,,the ,,bassines ,,to ,,be ,,reunited ,,to ,,their ,,original ,,source0 #abd 8,,he ,,knew ,,the ,,old ,,musician ,,suffered ,,from ,,headaches10 ,,etc4 #abf ,,the ,,becket 7,,actual ,,size7 #abh ,,profile ,,view ,,of ,,the ,,porte-,,chapeaux ,,of ,,noisette ,,cheval ,,reconstructed ,,and ,,in ,,use #acj ,,reception ,,held ,,by ,,the ,,american ,,academy ,,for ,,the ,,popularization ,,of ,,antiquities ,,on ,,the ,,lawn ,,before ,,the ,,academy',s ,,building ,,at ,,the ,,san ,,francisco ,,exposition #acf ,,old ,,virginia ,,four-,,poster ,,inlaid ,,with ,,mahogany #add -------- ,,antiqueing ,,ahead ,by ,,eben ,s4 ,,twitchett -------- ,illustration ,,antiqueing ,,ahead ,by ,,eben ,s4 ,,twitchett1 ,b4,b4,s41 ,f4,a4,a4,p4,a41 ,,etc4 ,it was ,mr4 ,leslie ,stephen1 ,i believe1 who remarked1 of the repartees of the late ,dr4 ,samuel ,johnson1 that it was futile to defend them except to those who enjoyed them without defense4 ,some color of this same good-humored contempt1 this faintly supercilious laissez-faire or1 as the ,french phrase has it1 this spirit of leave it lay1 has too long characterized the attitude of antiquers in general toward those who seem1 to the esoteric view1 at least1 ,philistine1 gentile4 ,antiquers have1 as a rule1 contentedly held themselves above the indignity of proselyting2 a little jealous1 perhaps1 of their relative rarity1 they have looked askance1 or two1 even1 at those who strayed1 unbidden1 into their company4 ,it was1 they felt1 enough to be an antiquer and to antique2 they knew no restless itch for converts2 they believed1 or affected to believe1 that the antiquer is as impossible of post-natal evolution as the ventriloquist or the ,ethiopian4 ,herein1 as ,professor ,kilgallen has at last made manifest1 antiquers have been doubly at fault--at fault in a parochial willingness to conserve for their own behoof an avocation at once innocent1 diverting1 and1 if individual taste so incline1 remunerative2 at fault again in assuming that the antiquer must needs be born in the vernacular that way4 ,these errors1 happily1 no longer reproach the confraternity at large4 ,the popularization of antiqueing1 under the purposeful leadership of ,professor ,kilgallen1 is1 one may assert1 almost a fait accompli1 or1 as the clever ,gallic dictum puts it1 an accomplished fact4 ,and it has been incidentally established1 surely1 that the antiquer may be made almost as expeditiously and convincingly as the antique itself4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,i ,,old ,,dutch ,,ovenside ,,chair ,,with ,,the ,,rare ,,pretzel ,,back2 ,,picked ,,up ,,in ,a ,,pennsylvania ,,german ,,settlement ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,sketch by the ,professor ,the inspiring example of ,milton ,kilgallen1 and the indisputable success of his endeavors1 have1 together1 persuaded me that ,i have been even more at fault than those esoteric antiquers1 if ,i may1 for the last time1 so describe them1 toward whom1 in the pride of my peculiarity1 ,i have felt and spoken very much as they1 in turn1 have felt and spoken of the ,philistine proper4 ,for years1 sedulously and vigilantly ,i have enjoyed a monopoly of the great branch of the art and science of antiqueing which continues to preoccupy my powers4 ,i have made no effort to interest other antiquers in my province2 ,i have thought of them1 indeed1 as scarcely less pitiable than those to whom an antique is a piece of1 in the vulgar idiom1 junk4 ,too1 even had ,i felt a need of sympathy and envy and applause in my secret ambitions and achievements1 ,i should have been restrained from the essay to share my enthusiasm by my fixed belief that it could be acquired in no way except that accident of inheritance by which it came to me4 ,peccavi1 or1 in the perhaps more pungent idiom of ,cicero1 ,i have sinned4 ,i now make confession and1 as far as may be1 atonement4 ,i reveal my guarded secrets1 at last1 without reserve4 ,i am still1 ,i believe1 the only antiquer ahead1 sui generis1 or1 to adopt the scintillating ,italian phrase1 alone in my class4 ,rather1 now that these lines have seen the light1 fui1 non sum4 ,i have been1 as the ,latins put it1 not ,i am4 ,for it will be enough to whisper my revelations2 there will be1 to-morrow1 ,i realize1 more antiquers ahead than one can shake a stick--if the reader will indulge me in the solecism of ending a sentence prepositionally--at4 ,to this ,i am resigned4 ,long enough have ,i enjoyed the sole entry to an entire tense2 long enough have brother and sister antiquers rummaged in the traditional and commonplace haunts of the antique1 the past2 long enough have they ventured no farther than the abode of the antiquer--the present4 ,to-morrow1 forsaking these well-trodden precincts1 they will join me in the virgin1 but pregnant1 future4 ,like me1 they will stoop no longer to the facile1 shameful processes of searching1 in cobwebbed bins and attics1 for antiques which any novice must recognize1 at a glance1 as old4 ,like me1 they will even smile at the enthusiasms of those who scratch in the dust and crow1 like barnyard fowl1 at each inevitable discovery4 ,like me1 they will know the pure joy of explorations and discoveries among the boundless stores of to-morrow's antiques4 ,i must begin at the beginning1 with my birth4 ,my destiny was predetermined by the ancestry of which ,i sprang4 ,my parents1 both of sturdy native stock1 were by instinct mated to produce the original antiquer ahead4 ,it was inevitable1 ,i apprehend4 ,it was to be4 ,it was4 ,my father1 worthy fellow1 had no clear knowledge of his natural talent4 ,my mother1 ,i sometimes fancy1 was remotely1 dimly conscious of her gift4 ,i can recall1 as yesterday1 the exalted look with which she witnessed the removal1 from our stately parlor1 of the array of commonplace antiques with which it had been furnished1 the joy with which she and my father arranged1 instead1 those potential antiques which only the gropings of their common hunger recognized for what they were4 ,even ,i1 then in plaid kilts1 did not at once share their delight1 their understanding4 ,i found the red plush surface of that priceless varnished oak sofa a harshly ticklesome affair2 ,i was1 to be sure1 impressed by the new frosted globes adorning the gasolier1 the intricate arabesques of the plaster rosette on the ceiling1 from which it sprouted downwards2 ,i need not say1 surely1 that these globes1 tinted a glorious winey purple1 decorated with protuberant knobs and profound depressions1 were none other than those very treasures of the ,obenchain collection1 famous in four hemispheres as the sole surviving set of admitted ,roscoe ,conkling gas-glass4 ,they were1 and ,i must marvel helplessly before the phenomenon of instinct which urged my father1 a simple-minded barber in the town of ,yonkers1 to choose1 unerringly1 for the tastes of fifty years beyond6 ,his taste1 untutored by any device of art1 was all but infallible4 ,he left me this1 and with it the store of masterpieces which have1 discreetly vended1 placed me beyond the reach of that financial anxiety which1 especially after the invention of the safety razor1 clouded his declining days4 ,my unhappy father6 ,it was his lot to begin his profession in the full flower of the ,whisker ,period1 and to survive those troubled years only to confront the ignoble age of the tubed cream and the tame1 inglorious two-edged blade4 ,it is impossible for me to think of him save with a filial tear1 and yet how cheerful he was6 ,how his place of business invited and allured the intellectual society of ,yonkers of his day6 ,how the racked1 lettered mugs gleamed in the gas-lights6 ,and how the air1 of a ,saturday night1 was gay with innocent mirth and pungent anecdote6 ,thus ,i began1 equipped by lavish ,nature as if to recompense in me the leanness of my paternal lot4 ,our house1 long before ,i grew to trouserable age1 was filled to flowing with such a collection as not even the indefatigable burrowings of the ineffable ,rapp and ,heller could1 in these degenerate times1 assemble4 ,in the parlor--incredible as it may sound--stood1 not one1 but two ,ulysses ,grant cuspidors1 one nicked a trifle1 but the other flawless--the priceless forget-me-notted ,grants1 ,i mean1 not the relatively common gilt-edged type4 ,they were even then my father's chiefest pride2 ,i--gratified in other boyish whims--was never suffered to use either of them except by stealth4 ,he treasured them1 born antiquer that he was1 undreaming that the pair would one day yield his son a thousand-fold their modest cost4 ,i owe him for them2 my mother1 herself no less percipient in other lines than he1 would have discarded them when1 after the unforgetable visit of ,moody and ,sankey1 my father forewent his self-indulgence in tobacco2 but his taste was true4 ,he clung to them with a dogged1 blind attachment for which ,i bless him still4 ,illustration3 ,,pair ,,of ,,wonderful ,,old ,,french ,,statuettes ,,now ,,the ,,property ,,of ,,dr4 ,,twitchett ,the owner has identified them as ,svres and pronounces them portrait statuettes--,no4 #a1 ,victor ,hugo in one of his moods2 and ,no4 #b1 a certain ,marquis de ,st4 ,quai1 probably a patron of ,victor ,hugo4 ,it was my mother who provided me with my inheritance of objets-d'art1 or1 as my ,parisian friends prefer to say1 objects of art4 ,in its way her instinct was as infallible as my father's own1 though possibly more limited in scope4 ,indefatigably she scrimped and saved to bring together the nucleus of my subsequent collection4 ,it would be cruel1 in the present era of inflation1 to set forth the catalogue4 ,my estimable colleague ,van ,loot1 forewarned as he is1 would not survive the list1 even if ,i omitted the prices1 but ,i owe her memory at least the tribute of some little particularity in the connection4 ,it was she who far-sightedly sacrificed our ,thanksgiving turkey to procure the figures of ,messrs4 ,moody and ,sankey1 obtainable then1 in the admirable porcelain work of the period1 for the trifling sum of three dollars each1 and even urged upon the buyer at that price by the agent of the pious firm which held the monopoly of their production4 ,my mother1 ,i remember1 shrewdly beat him down to #b4ge1 and exacted that ten cents of this sum should be paid in trade at my father's shop--the agent happily requiring his professional attention at the moment4 ,it was typical of her1 this combination of prodigality and thrift--the distinguishing characteristic1 as ,professor ,kilgallen has so often said1 of the true antiquer4 ,without knowing why she did it1 my mother could and did perform prodigies of economy to lavish the slow1 niggard savings in which they fruited on the gratification of her driving1 dominant passion for that which1 she must have realized1 would be one day an antique4 ,it was what we learned to expect of her1 my father and ,i2 he complained only covertly1 when our ,thanksgiving dinner revealed itself to be the usual baked beans and pork1 and cautioned me with emphasis against repeating in my mother's hearing the remarks he permitted himself on the subject in the relative privacy of the shop4 ,as zealously as my father his ,grant cuspidors1 so did my mother cherish and guard the images of the exhorters4 ,they stood like tutelary saints at either extreme of our mantel-shelf1 dusted by no hands but her own1 at once the pride and solace of her lot4 ,in spite of breath-stopping offers--among them the blank1 signed check tendered me by ,cornelius ,obenchain ,van ,loot in person--,i have never brought myself to part with them1 although1 having now become obvious antiques1 they possess but a purely sentimental interest for me4 ,so1 too1 have ,i preserved the glass cane which our journeyman barber1 a roving1 sportive soul1 brought with him from the ,centennial ,exposition at ,philadelphia1 during the closing days of the fruitful ,grant ,period4 ,i cannot forget the intensity with which my mother thirsted for possession of this trophy2 she gave the adventurous journeyman no peace until he consented to part with it1 taking payment in the laundering of his stiff-bosomed shirt1 which1 indulging a taste for display perhaps out of harmony with his station1 he rarely wore more than a week without having it restarched and ironed4 ,the cane1 affixed with a bow of wide red ribbon to our parlor wall1 became1 presently1 a proof that our family had visited the ,centennial4 ,i held my tongue in the presence of impressed visitors1 learning swiftly to avoid the unstimulating truth and1 no doubt1 even then in vague1 secret sympathy with my mother's aspirations4 ,she must invent a reason for buying a thing at once so impractical and so little decorative2 she did not guess that she saw in it an antique beyond price2 perforce she explained her purchase on the disingenuous and unworthy ground that folks would be bound to think we'd went there and bought it right off them glass-blowers our own-selves4 ,but ,i knew4 ,i understood4 ,even then1 ,i must believe1 ,i was an antiquer ahead4 ,for1 with my own savings1 one ,christmas in the ,arthur ,period1 ,i bought1 as a gift to both parents in common1 no less a treasure than a genuine ,garfield toothpick-container--the miniature1 in genuine pressed glass1 of a silk hat1 which1 inverted1 stood for a decade in the centre of our table on all occasions of state1 and which1 with its original content of toothpicks1 including four showing signs of actual use1 ,i reluctantly disposed of to the buyer for ,queen ,mary's collection at a price which both modesty and my gentleman's agreement forbid me to confess4 ,it was only natural that ,i should react to the twin stimuli of inheritance and environment4 ,my early days were spent in the constant and inspiring contemplation of articles of vertu which the most discerning taste of the contemporary moment would not have recognized as even potentially antiques4 ,i could not1 indeed1 enter our house without contemplating the statuettes of the ,christian ,slaves who knelt1 one on each side of the steps1 mutely supplicating the beholder's piety and pity4 ,if ,i would strike a sulphur match in the front hall1 to light my way up the stairs to bed1 ,i must do it on nothing less precious than a perfect specimen of the ,benjamin ,harrison match-holder--the peculiarly rare and exotic type1 ,i mean1 wherein a mother hen and a young chick are depicted1 the mature fowl's plumage being formed cunningly of colored sand-paper and the wee chickling being made to say1 in a loop issuing from its open beaklet3 8,don't scratch me--scratch ,mother40 ,this1 even in those unappreciative days1 was held far preferable to the alternative device1 wherein a frowzy vagabond is illustrated1 his raiment a mosaic of sand-paper fragments1 with the legend3 8,scratch your matches ,on my patches40 ,we possessed a number of these1 in addition to the rarer article already described4 ,our home1 simple though it was1 and afflicted always with the pressure of harsh poverty1 was veritably a treasure-house of potential antiques4 ,it was impossible to enter any room without coming under their subtly stimulating influence--even the bathroom contained1 from my earliest recollection1 the most perfect specimen of the ,garfield tin tub ,i have ever seen1 and the incidental plumbing1 though hidden1 according to the mode of the moment1 under a mask of painted pine1 was in entire harmony with the spirit of this dominating piece4 ,our mantel1 in addition to the figurines already mentioned and illustrated1 was laden with the tokens of my parent's discernment and discretion4 ,there was an all but priceless decalcomania picture on varnished wood1 portraying the glories of ,niagara ,falls2 there was a wealth of companion pieces1 illustrating the ,natural ,bridge1 ,ausable ,chasm1 the ,town-,hall of ,darien1 ,connecticut1 and an especially rare piece circa '#hd purporting to be merely a souvenir of ,sulphur ,springs ,grove1 ,erie ,county1 ,new ,york1 and long since unobtainable except at auctioneers' sales of large and unusually complete collections4 ,i inherited1 among other treasures1 my father's unusually well-preserved file of ,police ,gazettes1 running back to that celebrated issue in which ,lillian ,russell's portrait appeared for the first time4 ,the man1 simple and unpretentious as he was1 possessed a true genius for preserving such memorabilia and discarding items of little or no value4 ,these pink pages were his pride and treasure through dark days of stress and privation2 he handled them reverently1 even when they were fresh from the press1 and insisted that those of his patrons who examined them should treat them with circumspection4 ,invariably1 with the advent of a new issue1 the previous one1 tenderly smoothed and flattened1 was laid away in the closet1 to be bound when occasion permitted4 ,connoisseurs have told me that ,i erred in parting with this collection when ,i accepted the proposals of that prince of antiquers1 ,morton ,fitz1 in #aiac4 ,i realize that the file must inevitably have appreciated heavily in value with the passage of another decade1 but ,i have no regrets4 ,it was too difficult for me to look over those ageing pages without yielding to the weakness of tears4 ,eheu1 fugaces 444 not even in the recent era of display of certain anatomical details could the eye rest so happily on opulent1 artless curves 444 the flesh-tones1 too1 thanks to the happy selection of the paper1 were poignantly realistic4 ,i am not sorry that ,i parted with them all4 ,i am1 always1 an antiquer ahead1 and these had become antiques of the past4 ,ave1 and farewell4 ,there must be an end even to the reminiscences of an antiquer4 ,and my purpose1 in this paper1 has not been to excite a vain envy in the readers of the 8,atlantic10 but rather to invite them to antique1 hereafter1 in the hereafter1 to espouse1 if they will1 that all-but-maiden fancy which has beguiled my leisured hours for twice two lustrums forty years4 ,they1 too1 if they please1 may be antiquers ahead instead of back4 -------- ,this essay1 with others of ,mr4 ,twitchett's charming papers1 inevitably first saw the light in the periodical which1 most happily1 reflects the spirit of the antiquer4 ,my great discovery of my own talent for this field of art came to me1 seemingly1 by chance2 but1 after all1 who dare affirm that such things owe their origin to blind accident1 that there is behind events so pregnant no purposeful and actuating ,cause8 ,not ,i1 of all men4 ,i say seemingly4 ,so be it4 ,the way of it was this3 ,workmen had demolished a decaying building which stood1 in those days1 within a few squares of my father's humble cottage4 ,with other boys of the vicinity ,i had looked on1 fascinated by the appeal which wanton destruction must exert on youth4 ,like them ,i had dreams1 too1 of buried treasure below those venerable timbers1 and burrowed hopefully among the litter which the wreckers left behind4 ,one of my playmates after another kicked aside1 in these explorings1 a metal object4 ,i found it1 and1 inspired by that inherited passion for the antique which has ruled my days1 held it1 examined it4 ,a cry of joy escaped me3 ,i detected1 along one of its blunt edges1 the corrosions of what seemed to me might have been spilled blood4 ,i looked more closely still1 crouching1 now1 shielding my treasure from the glances of the bigger boys1 able1 if they guessed the nature of my trove1 to snatch it from me and make it theirs instead4 ,i slunk away4 ,in safe seclusion ,i looked again4 ,there could be no doubt4 ,to that sinister rusted edge stout1 short hairs still adhered6 ,i thrust the precious relic inside my shirt and sped homeward4 ,in my ingenuous1 artless youth ,i made sure that ,i had found a token of some ancient deed of blood2 that luck had led me to a trophy such as no other youth in all ,yonkers--at that day--could hope to possess4 ,i hid it lovingly below my ,sabbath garments in my bureau drawer1 and gloated over it1 in private1 when the thing seemed safe4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,ii ,,magnificent ,,old ,,flat-,,front ,,early ,,new ,,jersey ,,sideboard ,,discovered ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,,in ,,an ,,obscure ,,part ,,of ,,newark ,inevitably1 ,i was taken in the act4 ,my father found me fondling my relic and took it roughly from me4 8,what you got there1 ,eb80 ,he held it gingerly1 for his profession had1 of course1 made him fastidious4 ,he was always careful of his hands1 my father4 ,he always washed them with soap1 before coming home to meals1 even after shaving a dozen customers6 ,my treasure displeased his cleanly instinct1 ,i could see4 8,a murderer's knife10 ,i whispered4 8,it's mine6 ,i found it under the ,mc,whorter house4 ,see--there's some hairs stuck to it60 ,my father flung it from him4 8,you'd ought to know the difference between bristles and hair--and you a barber's son6 ,that ain't a knife--'tain't nothin' only ,dib ,mc,whorter's old sow-scraper6 ,seen a hundred jes' like it6 ,folks used to keep 'em for hog-killin' time1 when everybody kep' a pig and done his own butcherin'4 ,scrape the bristles with40 ,i was crestfallen at the sordid truth4 ,for a moment ,i almost shared my father's fastidious disgust4 ,but1 when he had gone1 my instinct reasserted its control of my emotions4 ,i recovered the sow-scraper from the rag-carpet where it lay4 ,i replaced it reverently in its hiding-place4 ,why8 ,i told myself1 then1 that my father was wrong2 that it was no sow-scraper1 but in truth the instrument of some forgotten1 gory deed4 ,i clung to it4 ,and1 later1 when it had lost its first vivid appeal1 ,i fetched it down to exhibit it to that great patron of antiqueing1 no less a person than ,cornelius ,obenchain ,van ,loot himself4 ,he had stumbled on our humble dwelling in one of his tireless searches for the antique--quests which1 the world knows1 have led him even farther afield than ,yonkers and ,poughkeepsie4 ,he had bought from my mother an excellent set of bedroom enamelware circa '#hh and his appetite had been whetted by the success4 ,he wanted more4 ,i remembered my relic4 ,this man1 to my untutored eye1 seemed artless and even a little contemptible--an opinion in which1 ,i perceived1 my mother concurred4 ,he possessed then1 as now1 that remarkable faculty of the gifted antiquer for convincing vendors of his complete simplicity4 ,i might persuade him1 ,i reflected1 that the bristles were human hair2 it seemed unlikely that he could be expert in such distinctions1 unless he had been1 like me1 a barber's son4 ,i shall not soon forget his cry of joy as his eye fell on my scraper4 ,it was the one time in my acquaintance with him that he permitted himself to betray satisfaction before a bargain had been closed4 ,it cost him1 on this occasion1 twenty dollars4 8,by all the gods1 a sow-scraper--a genuine1 unquestionable sow-scraper1 with bristles1 intact1 in excellent condition6 ,boy1 did you come honestly by this8 ,no tricks1 now6 ,is it your own to sell80 ,i established1 with my mother's ardent corroboration1 my character and my title4 ,the great ,van ,loot believed1 at last4 8,priceless10 ,i heard him murmur4 8,perfect6 ,superb60 and then aloud1 to me3 8,little man1 ,i'll give you twenty dollars for this old piece of iron4 ,twenty dollars--60 8,i guess you will10 ,i said1 even then actuated by the instinct of the antiquer4 8,who wouldn't8 ,see any green in my eye80 ,a phrase since fallen into disuse1 but at that date much in favor4 8,you gimme fifty and we'll talk40 ,we compromised at forty4 ,it was a triumph rather for my family than for me1 for my mother expropriated the cash before ,i could escape1 and subsequently invested it1 happily for me1 on a mustache-cup dutifully gilt-lettered 8,father10 a small bone carved in the crude semblance of a human hand and attached to a long slender rod an instrument employed1 as all antiquers know1 in the day of red-flannel underwear1 for the comforting purpose of scratching an itching back without the tiresome routine of removing clothes1 and a pottery sculpture of a pug-dog1 which articles1 ripened into antiques by the amiable1 intervening years1 yielded me some thousands per centum on the investment4 ,but the episode was far more significant than it seemed1 in its effect upon my life4 ,forty dollars was the price current of a sow-scraper4 ,i consulted my father1 cannily4 ,they had been made1 it appeared1 by the local smith1 at a uniform price of twenty-five cents4 ,his memory is accurate4 ,informed of the transaction he used emphatic speech in regretting his failure to lay in a stock1 in the days of plenty4 ,it would have paid better1 he averred1 than barbering for ,jay ,gould himself1 or curling ,ferd ,ward's own whiskers6 ,from that day ,i was a blooded antiquer ahead4 ,i have no passion for the merely old2 it would be as unexciting1 for me1 to delve and seek for treasure in dusty corners1 after the habit of the commonplace antiquer1 as to angle for goldfish in a glass bowl4 ,i play the nobler game4 ,i antique1 not in yesterday1 but in to-morrow4 ,ah1 the fascination of it6 ,the intoxication of tearing the veil from the inscrutable hereafter1 the blood-quickening element of risk1 as one selects and stores away the antiques of to-morrow-years1 against the day of rarity and famine6 ,ah1 the triumph of a well-stocked bin1 sealed till the day of reckoning6 ,i have enjoyed these delights alone2 ,i share them1 now1 with those who have the soul to follow in my steps4 ,since the closing days of the first ,cleveland ,period1 ,i have systematically antiqued ahead1 privately1 unadvertised1 secretly exulting4 ,even now1 those earlier bins and cupboards have begun to justify my penetrating choice4 ,who1 of all the unthinking thousands who beheld the wired bustle in its heyday1 thought to preserve a full dozen against to-day8 ,who1 but ,eben ,s4 ,twitchett1 ridiculed as a crank and a fanatic by his neighbors1 unhonored and unsung by myopic antiquers1 the prey of dealers in alley trash8 ,who1 but ,eben ,s41 had the forethought to store1 in ample camphor1 a perfect set of ,harrison red flannels1 and no less than six petticoats of the same material and date8 ,who1 of all the gray-haired collectors who seek and cherish them to-day1 but might have laid by as full a stock as mine of lapel-buttons circa '#id bearing the obsolete argot of the period--quip and jest which have all but lost their significance now8 ,or the buttons advertising bicycles--,the ,rambler and the ,tribune--built with a truss--the ,victor and ,columbia and ,pierce8 ,who had the wit and courage to store away the stereoscopes and the twin photographs that in them found perspective--priceless and unattainable to-day8 ,the ,chinese ,tea ,pickers8 ,the ,yellowstone8 ,brooklyn ,bridge8 ,who boasts of these but ,eben ,s4 ,twitchett1 with his mid-ninety bin crammed to overflow with perfect specimens8 ,who stored the spun-glass trinkets of the ,chicago ,fair8 ,who1 if he chose1 might break the market in cylindrical phonograph records of 8,ta-ra-ra-ra-boom-de-ay0 and 8,the ,stars and ,stripes ,forever08 ,who1 ,i ask1 possesses one gross of ,american flags of the ,mc,kinley ,period1 each exquisitely inscribed with its 8,remember the ,maine--to hell with ,spain08 ,who can supply collectors with uncut1 first edition pamphlet copies of the ,great ,cross of ,gold oration1 each with its rare ,bryan print--that almost unobtainable portrait including hair8 ,the reader bears with my little pan of triumph4 ,these things are history1 among antiquers of high degree and low and middle4 ,but who1 of all those who beat on ,eben ,s4 ,twitchett's doors to-day1 who plead and supplicate for even a peep into the sealed bins of the ,roosevelt ,epoch1 who1 of all these1 has the courage to antique1 in this year #aibc1 for the antiquers of to-morrow8 ,eben ,s4 ,twitchett has4 ,time1 the great revealer1 shall one day let in full light on the storerooms where his treasures are laid down1 to-day as yesterday4 ,what will ,time see there8 ,ah1 that is for each forward-looking antiquer to determine for himself4 ,i cannot bring myself to share too many of my secrets1 even now4 ,and the true antiquer would regret a guidance too exact2 the allure of the avocation lies1 for the select few who find the true spirit of the art1 in the very element of doubt4 ,one may lay down the wrong thing2 it may never achieve the quality of an antique4 ,who can tell8 ,for me1 ,i put away1 from time to time1 such trifles as commend themselves to my tried instinct4 ,just now1 by way of illustration1 ,i am putting down a complete line of felt pennants such as the travelling public loves to flaunt from burdened ,fords--,brick ,creek1 ,iowa--,wappingers' ,falls--,keeseville and ,ogunquit4 ,these must1 one day1 be seen as rare and lovely things2 ,i give the hint for what it may be worth4 ,the pocket-flask1 too--the still--the vanity-case--the cigar-lighter--and the flower-holder with which the stately limousine must be equipped--the photographs of screen divinities6 ,it will not be long before ,i shall unseal my bin of portraits where ,j4 ,warren ,kerrigan and ,francis ,x4 ,bushman1 autographed1 await the questing antiquer's delighted eye4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,iii ,,from ,,professor ,,kilgallen's ,,collection ,,of ,,beautiful ,,old ,,wood-,,carvings ,figure of ,pocahontas2 believed to be the work of ,john ,alden ,only yesterday1 ,i sold the last of my cigarette pictures4 ,della ,fox6 ,i had a hundred of her1 once4 ,it seemed impossible for us ,yonkers boys1 trading acutely in that fresh1 delighted loveliness1 that it could ever be antique6 ,i must have felt1 intuitively1 even then1 that it must be4 ,wanting that intuition1 too1 ,i would not have stored away the thumbed installments of my nickel weeklies--those precious specimens that one may view1 now1 under glass1 on free days1 at the ,metropolitan ,museum of ,antiques4 ,time has done it4 ,and time will do it again4 ,antiquer1 antique1 but antique ahead6 -------- ,,hints ,,for ,,buying ,,from ,,original ,,sources ,by ,,cecilia ,,lefingwell ,,prynne 7,,mrs4 ,g,,tz7 -------- ,illustration ,,hints ,,for ,,buying ,,from ,,original ,,sources ,,by ,,cecilia ,,lefingwell ,,prynne 7,,mrs4 ,g,,tz7 ,if1 in passing a ,new-,england farmhouse1 you see a fine piece of old furniture through the open front doorway which is not probable1 as the front doors are seldom used1 or if perchance you spy upon the veranda1 or in the fairway beside the barn1 some rare old bit of glass1 a bow-backed pine ,windsor chair1 a tambo-door sideboard1 or a hooked rug1 or any other article you may wish to purchase1 it will be well for you not to approach the subject directly1 but in a somewhat roundabout manner1 as the peasants of this section are on account of bitter experience extremely suspicious of strangers2 and if they perceive that you wish to buy anything of them1 they are likely to become instantly so fond of the object of your desire that they will decline to part with it2 or they may get the notion that you are connected with the prohibition enforcement laws and are merely disguising your real interest in how hard their cider has turned4 ,therefore the editors have asked me to prepare a few model dialogues which may be found useful in this connection4 ,the form of approach suggested can profitably be studied by the motorist collector4 ,,dialogue ,,one ,mr4 ,b41 a ,chicago collector of hooked rugs1 has observed a fine specimen hanging on a clothes-line beside a ,new ,hampshire farmhouse4 ,mr4 ,b4 descends from his car and approaches the proprietor1 who is sawing wood near the kitchen wing4 ,mr4 ,b43 ,good-morning4 ,i stopped to inquire if you have a calf for sale4 ,peasant3 ,did ye8 ,mr4 ,b43 ,i am willing to pay quite a good price for an original she-calf in fair condition4 ,peasant3 ,be ye8 ,mr4 ,b43 ,i would pay #cej for a really excellent she-calf4 ,peasant3 ,let's see the money4 ,mr4 ,b4 displaying the sum mentioned3 ,but have you such a calf8 ,peasant3 ,yes2 but ,i wouldn't never sell her under #cee4 ,mr4 ,b43 ,done with you at #cee6 ,go fetch her4 ,but stay2--,i have nothing to wrap her in4 ,peasant3 ,what ye want to wrap her fer8 ,mr4 ,b4 laughing graciously3 ,it is customary in the city to wrap all purchased articles1 and besides she might take cold4 ,let me see what you have to wrap this she-calf in4 ,ah6 ,there is a worthless old hooked rug4 ,that will do to wrap my purchase in4 ,peasant3 ,well1 ,i don't know4 ,that there rug's wuth somethin'4 ,i'll have to charge ye two dollars extry for the rug4 ,mr4 ,b4 restraining his excitement1 handing the peasant #b4jj and removing the rug from the clothes-line3 ,very well4 ,i hereby purchase the rug2 and upon second thoughts ,i find ,i have no definitely pressing need for a she-calf at this time4 ,good-morning and the best of luck to you6 ,illustration3 ,,old ,,new ,,england ,,print ,,of ,,the ,,first ,,meeting ,,of ,,the ,,american ,,academy ,,for ,,the ,,popularization ,,of ,,antiquities ,from the collection of ,miss ,cora ,kilgallen ,brtche1 of ,appleby1 ,pa41 two 7and possibly three7 of whose ancestors took part in the meeting4 ,,dialogue ,,ii ,mrs4 ,c4 wishing to buy for her salon in ,new ,york a fine old white pine fan-backed rocking-chair she has discovered upon a farmhouse veranda3 ,can you tell me if there is a family of the name of ,pibuddy living in this vicinity8 ,peasant3 ,no1 ,i can't4 ,mrs4 ,c43 ,or ,littlefield8 ,peasant3 ,never heard of 'em4 ,mrs4 ,c43 ,or ,smith8 ,peasant3 ,they's some ,smiths up at ,baxter's ,dam ,corners4 ,them who ye lookin' fer8 ,mrs4 ,c43 ,yes4 ,they are the very ones4 ,i want to take them a cradle for their baby1 as they are relatives of mine4 ,have you a cradle for sale8 ,peasant3 ,no1 ,i ain't4 ,mrs4 ,c43 ,or any watermelons1 perhaps8 ,peasant3 ,don't grow none4 ,mrs4 ,c43 ,i'm so sorry4 ,i haven't seen these dear old cousins of mine for so long2 and ,i did want to take them some little thing to please them4 ,i'd give as high as three or four dollars for a cradle or a watermelon4 ,peasant3 ,i don't see no way to oblige ye4 ,mrs4 ,c4 affecting to discover the rocking-chair3 ,oh1 ,i know what we could do4 ,my chauffeur is very ingenious4 ,i could give you forty cents for that old chair and he can make a cradle out of it as we go along4 ,peasant3 ,that chair's wuth more'n forty cents4 ,it's wuth a dollar if it's wuth a penny6 ,mrs4 ,c4 handing the peasant a dollar3 ,thank you6 ,please place it in my car4 ,exit4 ,,dialogue ,,iii ,miss ,d4 entering country general store because she has seen through the window a magnificent #ahjd ,seneca grate-burner stove with a fire-back showing the arms of ,massachusetts which she wishes to add to her collection3 ,have you by chance seen a lost ,mexican hairless dog with one white forefoot1 three brown1 and a slight limp8 ,storekeeper3 ,who8 ,miss ,d43 ,i am looking for a lovely little dog without any hair and very susceptible to low temperatures4 ,storekeeper3 ,we don't handle none4 ,miss ,d43 ,he is lost1 but ,i should fear to find him here because your store is so chilly and he would lack warmth4 ,i wonder you do not buy a new stove4 ,permit me to send you one4 ,storekeeper3 ,who be ye8 ,miss ,d43 ,i will give you my address4 ,hands him her card4 ,i fear if my lost little hairless dog should wander in here he would find the air too cold4 ,on that account ,i wish to offer you a modern stove in place of that fearful old thing yonder4 ,when the new stove arrives1 will you be so kind as to have this old one shipped to me1 express charges collect1 as a slight compensation for the trouble ,i am taking on account of my dear little dog's health8 ,storekeeper3 ,if you send me a new stove1 ,i'll do it1 by ',ory6 ,miss ,d43 ,that is all ,i wished to ascertain4 ,thanking you--,exit laughingly4 ,,dialogue ,,iv ,professor ,k41 the well-known historian1 has heard that a ,fisherman of ,martha's ,vineyard owns a set of ,venetian glass comfit boxes once the property of ,henri ,quatre4 ,he enters the ,fisherman's shack4 ,prof4 ,k43 ,good-morning4 ,i am interested in getting your opinion of a set of ,whitman1 bound in green cloth or morocco at your option4 ,may ,i show you-- ,fisherman3 ,no1 ye can't4 ,i don't take no interest in politics4 ,prof4 ,k43 ,then perhaps ,i could get your opinion of a line of haberdashery ,i carry4 ,my own necktie1 or scarf1 if you prefer that term1 is an example4 ,do you like it8 ,fisherman3 ,can't say as ,i don't3 can't say as ,i do4 ,prof4 ,k43 ,it would become you better than it does me4 ,let me exchange it with you for some bait4 ,i observe that you keep your clams for bait in those funny-looking little red glass boxes1 yonder4 ,i will give you my necktie for the clams1 but ,i shall have to ask for the boxes also1 since the nude clams would soil my pockets4 ,fisherman3 ,no4 ,them glass boxes was left to me by my grandmother and ,i wun't throw 'em in with no clams4 ,prof4 ,k43 ,as you will4 ,but how am ,i to carry the clams unless ,i have the boxes8 ,ah6 ,i have it6 ,i will borrow them of you and return them by a messenger from my hotel4 ,fisherman3 ,how do ,i know ye will8 ,prof4 ,k43 ,i will leave my hat1 coat1 and trousers as security4 ,he removes them as he speaks1 and ties the scarf about the ,fisherman's throat4 ,there1 look in the cheval glass and see how vastly it improves you4 ,i will return the glass boxes by the messenger and you will kindly give him my clothes4 ,au revoir6 ,he takes the comfit boxes upon his back and instantly swims with them to the mainland4 -------- ,it was by following these hints that the ,rockfund collection of petiteries was largely made4 ,collectors will do well to wear several suits of clothes4 -------- ,,the ,,secret ,,of ,,success ,by ,,murgatroyd ,,elphinstone -------- ,illustration ,,the ,,secret ,,of ,,success ,,by ,,murgatroyd ,,elphinstone1 ,a4,b41 ,a4,m41 ,f4,r4,f4,h4,a4 7,lecturer on ,scrollwork and ,frets at ,sinsabaugh ,university1 #aiag-ah7 ,the secret of antique-collecting is persistence4 ,my friend ,g----1 who spent three years of her life walking through the mud and dust of ,maine1 ,new ,hampshire1 and ,vermont roads in an attempt to locate the ,log-,cabin-,with-,flag-,and-,cider-,bar rel cup-plate1 which she needed to round out her set of cup-plates1 claims that the true secret of antique-collecting is good health4 ,she is no judge1 however1 as she encountered a series of unusual misfortunes in her search for the missing cup-plate4 ,first she was caught in a bad northeaster without her goloshes1 and developed a severe case of rheumatic fever4 ,then she fell down and broke her arm4 ,shortly after that she was struck by lightning4 ,and a little while later she was run over by a ,ford which appeared from nowhere as she was trudging up a mountain-side one glorious golden morning in search of a farmer who was reputed to use cup-plates as fly-poison receptacles4 ,g----1 in her droll ,new ,england manner1 throws me into convulsions by saying that she thinks the ,ford1 like ,topsy1 just growed4 ,i am sure that if ,g---- had persisted in continuing her search for the missing cup-plate1 even though she had to travel on crutches1 she would eventually have been successful4 ,therefore ,i say that the secret of antique-collecting is persistence4 ,it is persistence that brings to light the unexpected treasure4 ,it is persistence that effects unexpected results4 ,it is persistence that enables the antique-collector to secure for fifty cents or one dollar a genuine antique that is worth from one hundred to five hundred dollars until it is put up for sale at an auction1 when it isn't worth so much4 ,illustration3 ,,statue ,,erected ,,to ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,,in ,,floral ,,park ,,city1 ,,florida1 ,,by ,,grateful ,,citizens ,,of ,,that ,,community ,professor ,kilgallen himself kindly took the entire responsibility for raising the fund for the beautifying of ,floral ,park ,city by the erection of this splendid bronze1 which is the work of ,mme4 ,olga ,mugsawflovich of ,moscow4 ,a guiding star for all antique-collectors1 whether amateur or professional1 may be found in the adventures of the old ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house just outside the little town of ,sunkset1 one of those delightful little settlements surrounded by cranberry bushes1 sand1 and ,down ,east accents on quaint and picturesque ,cape ,cod4 ,the ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house was built in #agdb by ,isaiah ,thrasher1 a direct descendant of the ,marjoribank family of ,lower ,tooting-on-,wye1 ,england1 one or more of whose members came to ,america on the ,mayflower4 ,considerable haziness exists concerning the descendants of the ,marjoribanks family owing to the fact that the name was pronounced ,marshunk by those familiar with ,english pronunciation1 and that some ,american records refer to the ,marjoribanks as ,marsh or as ,shawbank or as ,bunk1 owing to the difficulty of properly separating the pronunciation and the spelling4 ,at any rate1 ,isaiah ,thrasher was a descendant of the one or more members of the ,marjoribanks family who came to ,america on the ,mayflower2 and he inherited from his ancestor a number of rare old pieces of ,english furniture1 including a very fine old chest4 ,the top of this chest was missing1 the feet were worn away1 and several of the boards had been removed1 stolen or lost from the front and sides4 ,nevertheless it was a very fine old chest1 and very rare4 ,probably not more than twenty-eight or thirty of these chests1 all told1 were brought over in the ,mayflower4 ,he also owned an extremely fine cradle of the same general type as that which is said to have sheltered ,peregrine ,white1 who attained fame by being born among the furniture of the ,mayflower1 though there are some who say that some of the furniture had to be moved out before ,peregrine could get in4 ,this cradle was of wicker and had probably been made in the ,orient1 whence it was brought to ,holland1 and there picked up1 just before the ,mayflower sailed1 by one of the ,marjoribanks family who had a fine eye for odd pieces of furniture4 ,another of his possessions was a beautiful turned chair with an unusual number of spindles4 ,it had so many spindles that any one who sat in it could easily spend two or three hours counting the spindles4 ,this came over in the ,mayflower1 and was unusually rare1 owing to the fact that most of the ,mayflower tourists eschewed chairs and stuck to larger and more space-filling pieces of furniture1 like desks1 whatnots1 highboys1 lowboys1 clocks1 bedsteads1 and chests4 ,most of them were evidently content to sit on the floor or lean against a highboy1 when not asleep or in motion4 ,the mere fact that ,isaiah ,thrasher inherited these rare and beautiful pieces of furniture from his ancestors filled him with a love for the good and the beautiful4 ,when1 therefore1 he moved from ,plymouth to ,sunkset in #agdb in search of more religious freedom than obtained in ,plymouth1 the farmhouse that he built conformed in every way to the best standards of ,colonial architecture4 ,the doorway was perfect2 all of the beams were hand-hewn of the finest oak2 the balustrades on the staircases were as gracefully curved as the lines of a woman's throat2 the fine corner cupboards throughout the house were gems of the joiner's art2 the fireplaces were generous and hospitable1 flanked by settles1 brick ovens1 and cupboards of pumpkin pine1 and duly decorated with spits1 cranes1 pot-hooks1 trammels1 trivets1 and sturdy andirons4 ,isaiah ,thrasher found all the religious freedom for which he sought in ,sunkset2 for there was practically nothing in ,sunkset but religious freedom and cranberries4 ,he died at the age of eighty-two1 and his house passed into the hands of his nephew1 ,jared ,titcomb1 who was noted on ,cape ,cod for being the champion cranberry-sauce-eater of the district1 and also for having accounted for three ,british soldiers just after the battle of ,concord by pushing a stone wall over on them4 ,jared ,titcomb in turn bequeathed the house to his son-in-law1 ,rufus ,whipplefish1 who was noted for nothing1 so far as can be learned2 and when ,rufus died1 the house descended to his son1 ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish1 who had the reputation of making the hardest cider in ,duke's ,county4 ,it was from this owner that the house took its name--the ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house--and it was through this owner that ,i became familiar with the house1 its history1 and its contents4 ,the house stood well out on the outskirts of ,sunkset1 surrounded by a heavy growth of apple trees1 pine trees1 lilacs1 willows1 rosa rugosa1 actinidia arguta1 stinkbush1 poplars1 and cranberries4 ,for this reason it had been overlooked by antique-hunters1 who buzz around ,cape ,cod in the spring1 summer1 and autumn with the same eagerness with which flies buzz around a cow in ,september4 ,i shall never forget the thrill which shot through me1 therefore1 when my friend ,l----1 who rather fancies himself as an antique-collector1 but who never knows enough to collect anything until some one has told him that it is worth collecting1 came to me one day and stated that he had visited an old house near ,sunkset1 but that there was nothing in it worth having4 ,in fact1 said he1 the old man who owned the house was probably a nut1 since he was saving an old chest that had no top and no legs1 and looked like something the cat brought in4 ,the flash of second-sight which should be possessed by all true antique-lovers1 and which almost never deserts me except when ,i am confronted by a reproduction so perfect as to deceive even the man who made it1 warned me that this chest was probably something very rare and unusual1 and possibly even a most important piece of ,americana4 ,with an air of careless unconcern perfected by years of antique-hunting--an air1 ,i may add1 which must be cultivated by all persons who hope to make a success of antiqueing--,i obtained from my friend ,l---- complete directions as to the location of the ,house ,of ,the ,chest4 ,as soon as ,l---- had gone on his way1 ,i dropped my air of unconcern1 snatched up a pint flask of gin1 which ,i find to be of inestimable value in dealing with the stern and rockbound ,new-,englanders1 and hastened at once to ,sunkset4 ,it was a brisk autumn day1 and the odor of stinkbush was particularly apparent as ,i made my way through the grove of trees which surrounded the ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house4 ,i shall never smell stinkbush again without thinking of that red letter day2 though ,i must confess that at the time it depressed me slightly4 ,mr4 ,whipplefish was seated in his beautiful old kitchen with his feet resting comfortably in a beautiful old brick oven2 and as ,i knocked at his back door1 he cried out in his kindly ,new ,england manner that he didn't want any1 and to go away4 ,pretending to misunderstand his words1 ,i opened the door and walked in4 ,then1 lest there be any unpleasantness1 ,i dropped my hat as though by accident1 and in stooping to pick it up permitted the pint flask of gin to slip from my breast pocket and fall into my hat4 ,this is a gesture which has saved the day for me on many and many an occasion where all seemed to be lost save honor4 ,a few days of practice will enable any one to drop a pint flask from his breast pocket and catch it unharmed in his hat with the utmost nonchalance4 ,having done this1 ,i affected great embarrassment and looked at the flask ruefully1 as though it had betrayed me in an embarrassing manner4 ,mr4 ,whipplefish's manner at once became more affable1 and he asked me with gruff ,cape ,cod hospitality what ,i wanted4 ,one thing led to another1 and by the time we had consumed the pint of gin1 he was permitting me to examine the furnishings of his home without protest4 ,the briefest examination of the topless and legless chest sufficed to convince me that ,i had encountered a genuine treasure4 ,all of the worm-holes of the tertiary class bore the unmistakable stigmata of the ,dutch worms of the first quarter of the seventeenth century4 ,those familiar with ,dr4 ,christian ,eisenbach's monumental work on the furniture worm will recall that a peculiar recurrence of frosts during several successive winters in ,holland so affected the nervous systems of the ,dutch furniture worms that they bored to the left in successive chelons1 or steps1 and cut into the borings of the worms beyond them4 -------- ,bores and ,borings4 ,dr4 ,christian ,eisenbach4 ,leipzig1 #ahdg4 ,the best test of the ,dutch worm of the first quarter of the seventeenth century is to place the forefinger over any worm-hole in a given space1 place the lips over the worm-hole next to the left of the obstructed orifice1 and blow firmly into it4 ,if the hole is a true ,dutch hole of the early seventeenth century1 a small cloud of dust will emerge from the hole next to the one in which the blower is blowing and will usually enter his eye4 ,if it is not a seventeenth-century ,dutch hole1 the blower can blow all day without obtaining any noteworthy results except a flushed face4 ,my first venture in applying this test to the ,whipplefish chest resulted in a cloud of dust which entered my eyes1 nose and ears and nearly choked me4 ,succeeding tests on other holes resulted in similar clouds of dust of such proportions that ,i was at length forced to desist in order to remove the accretions from my eyes4 ,this was incontrovertible proof that the chest had been in existence in ,holland during the first quarter of the seventeenth century1 and that it had undoubtedly been acquired by the ,pilgrims during their enforced vacation in ,leyden before sailing for ,america in the ,mayflower4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,iv ,,priceless ,,bit ,,of ,,old ,,staffordshire ,,ware 7,a ,,paper-,,weight7 ,,collected ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,cursory glances around the interior of the ,whipplefish house1 after my eyes had been cleared with the assistance of ,mr4 ,whipplefish and a little gin and water1 revealed1 in addition to the cradle and the spindled chair which ,i have mentioned1 some very fine old wrought-iron latches and ,h and ,l hinges on the doors1 which were in themselves beautiful specimens of the art4 ,the lintels and sills of the doors were simply but exquisitely carved2 while the oak rafters which held up the ceilings were so mellowed and patinated by age that their rugged strength was most attractive4 ,all of the downstairs rooms were sheathed in boards of pumpkin pine nearly three feet in width and without a knot in them4 ,how symbolical of the changes that have taken place in our country is the pine1 that simplest of trees6 ,in the earnest1 upright1 early days of ,america1 the pine grew without knots4 ,to-day every pine tree has so many knots in it that a person must rise at midnight in order to get them counted before breakfast4 ,and similarly1 to-day1 the ancient ideals of honor and honesty seem to have departed from us4 ,this is particularly apparent to one who moves much in antique circles4 ,behind each corner lurks a human harpy who would gladly take candy from a child or use a sand-bag if all else fails4 ,concealing my passionate desire to relieve ,mr4 ,whipplefish of all his belongings1 ,i dismissed the subject of antiques as being of no consequence1 and spoke at some length with him concerning gin4 ,when he voiced his appreciation of the flavor of my particular brand1 ,i informed him that it was genuine pre-war gin1 and that it was practically priceless4 ,while this was not strictly true1 ,i had none the less manufactured it according to a tried receipt given to me by an employee of the ,cuban ,legation in ,washington who dispenses great quantities--which he makes himself--as genuine pre-war gin4 ,his statements are believed in ,washington2 and the gin is used at many important social functions in the capital and always spoken of reverently as pre-war gin4 ,consequently ,i believe that ,i am within my rights in speaking of it in the same way4 ,when ,i had made plain to him the extremely valuable nature of the gin1 ,i told him frankly that since he seemed to have a discriminating taste in such things1 ,i was willing to let him have an entire quart of it1 and that in exchange ,i was willing to take his old chest as a pleasant reminder of my visit to ,cape ,cod4 ,after some grumbling ,mr4 ,whipplefish agreed to this exchange1 whereupon ,i repaired to my room in the ,sunkset ,house1 mixed the gin1 and hastened back to the ,whipplefish home with it4 ,i carried the chest away the same day1 and have since refused an offer of two hundred dollars for it4 ,during the next two days ,i did not go near the ,whipplefish house2 but at the expiration of the two days--which1 in ,mr4 ,whipplefish's case1 ,i judged to be about the life of one quart of gin--,i returned and found him in a state of nerves4 ,the antique-collector must learn to be patient4 ,nothing is gained by rushing matters4 ,if ,i had gone to ,mr4 ,whipplefish before he had finished the gin1 ,i could have done very little business with him probably4 ,the antique-collector must also learn restraint4 ,if ,i had offered ,mr4 ,whipplefish a case of gin for his chest instead of one quart1 he would probably have smelled a rat4 ,he might have held the chest for a higher price1 or he might have had the gin analyzed4 ,either course would have caused me considerable embarrassment4 ,at any rate1 ,i found him in a state of nerves on my second visit4 ,the offer of another quart in return for his cradle met with an instant response4 ,i subsequently sold the cradle for six hundred dollars4 ,on my third visit ,i got the spindled chair for three quarts of gin4 ,i am holding this chair for fifteen hundred dollars and expect to get it4 -------- ,prospective buyers will kindly communicate with the publishers4--,eds4 ,by this time ,mr4 ,whipplefish was growing somewhat accustomed to my presence1 and seemed almost willing that ,i should help myself to whatever ,i wanted so long as ,i placed a bottle or two of pre-war gin in his hand as a little token of remembrance and esteem4 ,for two bottles of gin per room ,i was permitted to remove the pumpkin pine wainscoting from the downstairs walls of the ,whipplefish house4 ,i used a part of it to sheathe my own library1 which has been pictured many times in the pages of ,the ,house ,elegant2 and the remainder ,i sold for seven hundred and forty-five dollars4 ,the doors of the inside rooms cost me one quart apiece1 with the hardware thrown in4 ,the big front door and carved sills with a graceful fanlight came higher4 ,that cost me half a case1 but it was worth it1 as ,i have since refused an offer of twelve hundred dollars for it4 ,this purchase also caused me a large amount of worry2 for ,mr4 ,whipplefish1 not being so young as he once was1 fell downstairs several times during the half-case period1 and led some people to think that he might die of over-exertion4 ,in fact1 he was found in a rigid state by neighbors two or three times before the six bottles were gone1 and was thought to be dead2 but each time he proved merely to be ossified1 and came back to life before the undertaker arrived4 ,my feelings may well be imagined during this trying time4 ,since there were several things which ,i still wished to remove from the ,whipplefish house1 my anxiety over his condition was naturally tremendous4 ,it affected me to such an extent that my hand slipped on one occasion when ,i was mixing a batch of gin1 and ,i got in twice as much essence as ,i should4 ,i was forced to throw away an entire quart of alcohol4 ,eventually ,mr4 ,whipplefish finished the six bottles without succumbing2 and after allowing him several days in which to recover1 ,i returned to the chase4 ,he was1 of course1 very glad to see me1 and did not demur at all when ,i gave him two bottles and removed the big brick fireplace with its quaint brick oven from the kitchen4 ,i could easily get five hundred dollars for this fireplace if ,i wished to take the money2 but ,i put ,art above ,commercialism1 like every true lover of the ,beautiful4 ,i shall always keep this quaint and hospitable hearth1 unless somebody offers me so much money that ,i cannot refuse4 ,my final purchase from ,mr4 ,whipplefish and the celebrated old ,whipplefish house was made on ,july #adth4 ,i remember the day very well1 for it is the anniversary of the fall of the ,bastille4 ,hereafter the date will always be associated in my mind with two falls4 ,early on the morning of that day ,i called on ,mr4 ,whipplefish and found him shaking all over4 ,his first question was1 8,got any gin80 ,i at once realized that the time was ripe to get the magnificent hand-hewn oak beams in the kitchen--beautiful things that ,i had coveted ever since ,i started coming to the house4 ,mr4 ,whipplefish was wholly reckless at that time1 and insisted on a higher price than ,i cared to pay2 but the beams were such rare and delightful pieces that ,i threw caution to the winds4 ,mr4 ,whipplefish1 with his ,yankee cunning gleaming in his little blue eyes1 insisted on an entire case of gin in return for these beams4 ,and ,i--,i paid it4 ,it may have been foolish of me to do so2 but the lure of the antique1 which no true collector can resist1 led me on4 ,i gave him the case for which he asked4 ,then ,i took out the beams4 ,as ,i was loading them on the team to take them away1 kindly old ,mr4 ,whipplefish stood in the doorway of the historic old ,whipplefish house1 waving a partly empty bottle around his head and crooning an old ,cape ,cod melody to me by way of farewell4 ,unfortunately1 in the middle of the song1 the bottle struck the side of the doorway4 ,the house1 weakened by the many removals1 at once collapsed1 burying ,mr4 ,whipplefish in the remains4 ,july is the busy season on ,cape ,cod2 and since it was supposed that ,mr4 ,whipplefish had been killed1 no effort was made to dig him out on that day4 ,on the following morning1 however1 he was heard crying for more gin2 so a number of natives rather reluctantly desisted from their regular summer occupation of relieving the summer visitor of his bank-roll1 and dug him out4 ,he was little the worse for wear1 for he had shielded the partly filled gin bottle with his body as the house caved in on him1 and the stimulant had eased the trying hours4 ,this1 however1 was not the end of the old ,whipplefish house4 ,a few months after the collapse a retired harness manufacturer from ,rochester1 ,new ,york1 who was travelling on ,cape ,cod in search of the antique and the quaint1 passed the ruins of the old ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house1 lying amidst the pine trees1 poplars1 stinkbush and cranberries4 ,as ,i have said before1 persistence is at the root of all successful antiqueing4 ,w----1 the retired harness manufacturer1 for some unknown reason made up his mind that he wished to restore the ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house to the exact state in which it was before its collapse4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,v ,,rare ,,bit ,,of ,,old ,,worcestershire ,,ware ,table ornament collected by ,professor ,kilgallen4 ,the little circles are all in gilt4 ,under his guiding hand and bank-roll it rose again amid the poplars1 pines1 and stinkbush4 ,all ,cape ,cod yielded up its treasures to him1 and almost every family on the ,cape enriched itself from the ,bright fortune4 ,if they didn't have genuine antiques to sell him1 they manufactured them4 ,to-day the ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish house stands in ,sunkset1 a monument to ,isaiah ,thrasher and the ,marjoribank family from whom he descended4 ,w---- paid ,elon ,d4 ,whipplefish three thousand dollars for the lot and the ruins2 and with this money ,elon bought into a nice two-masted schooner4 ,he went into the business of running rum up from the ,bahamas2 and when he saw the stuff that goes into the bottles that he sold1 he went on the water-wagon4 ,in a little over a year's time he became a wealthy man1 and bought a house on ,mount ,vernon ,street in ,boston1 where he could be near the movies and the atmosphere from which his distant ancestor1 ,isaiah ,thrasher1 had fled in #agdb4 -------- ,,old ,,rugs1 ,,old ,,iron ,,old ,,brass1 ,,old ,,glass ,a ,brief ,brochure on the ,search ,for the ,antique ,by a ,professional ,,jared ,p4 ,,kilgallen -------- ,illustration ,,old ,,rugs1 ,,old ,,iron ,,old ,,brass1 ,,old ,,glass ,a ,brief ,brochure on the ,search ,for the ,antique ,by a ,professional ,,jared ,p4 ,,kilgallen1 ,j4,d4 and ,r4,p4 7,a ,second-,cousin of ,professor ,kilgallen7 ,the lure of the antique6 ,who is there that has not thrilled and flushed at the words8 ,i confess at the outset3 ,i am a collector and you may even call me by that damning word 8dealer10 too1 if you choose1 since1 like all non-amateur collectors1 ,i part with items of my collection from time to time2 or1 if you prefer to put it so1 from day to day4 ,no collection is a permanency until it is established in an endowed museum3 all private collections are constantly in a state of fluctuation1 or flux2 for the taste of the true collector is as constantly altering4 ,other contingencies also affect collections4 ,for instance1 no collection of ,colonial utensils is safe from carelessness1 and ,i have known a pair of the virtually priceless old hand-wrought #aheb ,b-mark ,brunswick sheep-clippers to be thrown out upon an ash-heap by an ,irish housemaid under the impression that they were valueless even to herself4 7,i know this because those very clippers formed a temporary part of my own possessions immediately afterward47 ,every collector is aware also that after the visits of even the best-introduced people almost any small article in a collection may be missing2 and under such circumstances the tracing of the lost item may prove too embarrassing to be considered4 ,my good friend1 ,dr4 ,g---- ,r---- ,vet4 ,m4,d4 and ,surg4 of ,erie1 ,pennsylvania1 missed a valuable metal medallion of ,president ,rutherford ,b4 ,hayes 7circa '#gh7 in this way1 after the visit of a number of his wife's relatives to the famous old ,g---- ,r---- ,manse at ,erie4 ,what is a collector to do in a case like this1 when a complaint might endanger actual estrangement8 ,dr4 ,g---- ,r---- informed me himself that when he discovered his loss he thought the matter over for some days and decided to say nothing about it4 ,illustration3 ,,dr4 ,,twitchett ,,and ,,mme4 ,,augustula ,,thomas',s ,,husband 7,,mr4 ,,thomas7 ,,wearing ,,the ,,insignia ,,of ,,full ,,members ,,of ,,the ,,american ,,academy ,,for ,,the ,,popularization ,,of ,,antiquities ,now1 to take up my own specialties 7if ,i may call them so71 ,i have the temerity to assume that my long experience in securing and handling these has possibly given me a little knowledge that may be of use to the amateur collector4 ,i do not claim too much1 perhaps1 when ,i state that hooked rugs and early ,american iron and glass were familiar items in my possession long before the present craze for collecting them came to rage so wildly and widely4 ,i have had exquisite hooked rugs1 and rare fragments of such rugs1 for instance1 as far back as #ahhf4 ,american glass has always been a passion 7if ,i may use the word7 with me4 ,in fact1 among my friends and relatives1 my search for really good glass has made me almost something of a by-word1 jocularly speaking4 ,the reader will easily connote that what ,i consider good glass is not a thing to be found every day in the week and that ,i am somewhat particular in my taste4 ,well1 ,i confess it1 and to substantiate the confession perhaps ,i should essay some description of what ,i mean by 8really good glass40 ,glass1 to be perfect in my eyes1 should be absolutely in the condition in which it left the retailer who sold it to the private purchaser4 ,i am aware that broken1 cracked1 or partially decomposed pieces have some value to the beginner1 and ,i myself do often handle them1 as a dealer1 it is true4 ,but it is sound glass that has kept me so diligently on the search day after day1 year after year4 ,sandwich and ,stiegel ,i leave to the beginner who likes to pay #ag for a ruby finger-bowl that was a drug on the market at two-for-a-quarter five years ago2 who gladly signs a check for #abe in exchange for a dozen ,benjamin ,franklin cup-plates regularly turned out at the ,sandwich factory for thirty cents a dozen1 up to the time when the strike closed production in ,general ,benjamin ,harrison's administration2 but for myself--well1 even a quaint old ,colonial ,sandwich lamp chimney1 manufactured during ,grover ,cleveland's first term1 or as far back as the supremacy of ,chester ,a4 ,arthur1 does not excite me4 ,a friend of mine proudly exhibits a lamp chimney said to have been persistently mistaken for a spy-glass by ,lafayette himself on a ,christmas ,eve1 on the occasion when he was so well entertained by the citizens of ,yonkers1 during his second visit to this country4 ,i have never made the slightest effort to obtain this bit4 ,no4 ,the perfect glass of my dreams--for ,i admit ,i am always dreaming of it--the perfect glass of my dreams is a bit of plain glass1 very simple4 ,it may be either pressed glass or moulded glass--,i care not2 and it may be browned in the making1 or clear2 ,i am indifferent about that4 ,i do not even insist upon its antiquity1 though the older it is the better1 of course2 but what ,i do value is the state of preservation in which ,i find it4 ,that is to say1 as ,i have already pointed out1 a specimen of glass1 to be really worth while1 should be precisely in the condition in which it left the retailer's shelf to pass to the original purchaser's possession1 and1 above all1 ,,the ,,original ,,contents ,,should ,,be ,,intact4 ,i admit that this is asking a great deal4 ,it is more than one requires1 for instance1 of seventeenth-century ,venetian glass1 or of old ,bohemian or of ,bristol4 ,shall ,i be accused of jingoism when ,i say that ,i1 personally1 have found perfection only in ,american glass8 7,a ,hungarian collector1 now resident in this country1 once asserted to me that he had found a sample of ,scotch glass in the state ,i hold to be really worth while2 but he was absolutely unwilling to show it1 though ,i made every effort to induce him2 and ,i ended by doubting him47 ,i do not claim that ,i have found worth-while glass frequently4 ,alas1 no6 ,for though ,i have looked and looked and hoped and hoped for it during many years1 ,i have actually discovered but two perfect examples--only two6 ,the first 7a superb thing from ,kentucky7 ,i found absolutely by chance in the queerest1 quaintest little place imaginable1 up a passageway behind a hotel1 early in the morning after the election of ,president ,taft2 and the second 7not so pure1 but nevertheless wonderful7 ,i discovered only last ,september1 among some shrubberies close to a summer mansion on the rugged coast of ,massachusetts4 ,what these discoveries meant to me1 only one who seeks with a like patient enthusiasm could comprehend4 ,i shall not describe my sensations2 it is enough to say that there are pleasures one must keep to one's self4 ,i did not even speak of my discoveries at the time2 but it may not be out of place for me to say now that they made me very happy4 ,indeed1 after the second1 ,i wandered for hours as in a dream1 and even on the following day1 when ,i chanced to meet a friend1 he passed me1 and then looked round over his shoulder at me for some time1 all without recognizing me4 ,illustration3 ,,the ,,glass ,,perfect ,from a drawing by ,jared ,p4 ,kilgallen1 ,esq41 ,j4,d4 ,r4,p41 of the item he considers most worth while in his collection4 ,note3 ,this glass is no longer in original condition4 ,now1 a word upon the manner and means of collecting4 ,as will readily be supposed1 ,i do not follow the ordinary channels or patronize the customary marts of trade in antiques4 ,i have nothing to say against the ,antiquity ,shops as such2 and ,i freely admit that many of them contain genuine prizes for the persistent seeker2 but after all they are for the amateur of careless purse4 ,it is true that in a shop one ,,can pick up a very small bit of rare value for nothing sometimes2 and ,i have done it successfully2 but the chances are against it1 and1 as it is always risky1 usually ,i have thought better not even to try4 ,no1 the shops are not my field of endeavor4 ,i say it in all modesty1 but ,i have done better among the garnered old treasures of one quiet1 private house than in a hundred ,antiquity ,shops4 ,in general1 a collector needs what ,i may be pardoned for calling the ,collector's ,eye4 ,to illustrate my meaning3 ,how many of my readers have not at some time missed an heirloom1 or other treasured object that has simply disappeared8 ,we all have these losses4 ,the missing object has1 most probably 7as we say71 just been 8thrown out40 ,the true ,collector's ,eye is ever busy in those places or receptacles where things are 8thrown out40 ,of course1 most of one's discoveries made in this manner consist of portions1 rather than of entire objects of vertu2 nevertheless1 ,i have thus picked up many of my best things4 ,but the true ,collector's ,eye is never at rest4 ,take an old gate in a fence1 or a dilapidated building of any sort3 the ordinary gaze may pass over these surfaces with mere ennui1 but many of my best old hinges1 latches1 etc41 have been wrenched from such environments1 merely in passing1 as it were4 ,the ,collector's ,eye will note the very fall of a fine old bit of blacksmithing from some careless horse4 ,no doubt the uninitiated critic will cry 8,fie60 upon this4 8,what8 ,are there collectors who collect horseshoes80 ,and may ,i ask3 8,why not1 indeed80 ,aside from the intrinsic value latent in any fine old bit of iron1 no true quoit-player would miss an opportunity to make a contribution to the beautifying and decoration of his home club4 ,and let me whisper in the ear of the ,philistine skeptic for his better information3 ,is he aware that in the finest ,louis ,,xv vitrine in the palace of ,prince ,oscar ,schofield1 at ,zorn1 under glass and reposing upon delicate shagreen velours1 is the gilded shoe of the steed of ,balaam8 ,if no collector had picked it up1 would it be there8 ,but ,i would impress upon the beginner3 he must not be content with merely picking up things4 ,he must1 indeed1 pick up what he can1 wherever there is a fair opportunity2 but ,i should not stand where ,i do to-day among collectors1 had ,i stopped with merely 8picking up0 things4 ,true1 ,i have picked up many and many's the good thing2 but my ,,best things were not obtained in this way4 ,i was quite a young man when ,i began collecting1 taking with me a sack1 and sometimes a wheelbarrow also1 for this purpose1 on my daily rambles4 ,one day it struck me that a splendid old ,colonial house1 which ,i had often passed1 must contain many lovely1 quaint old things that would be charming for a person of taste to number among his curios4 ,there was a 8,to ,let0 sign upon the house1 and ,i confess that the thought of the difficulties in my way dismayed me4 ,to seek out the agent1 to obtain from him the name and location of the owner of the house1 who might prove to be1 perhaps1 a resident of some distant city difficult of access--to do all this and then bargain and bicker with the owner 7in case ,i reached him71 to chaffer over prices1 and in the end1 very likely1 to find him obdurately avaricious3 what was the use8 ,seldom have ,i been more discouraged2 but ,i think ,i may have mentioned that ,i am a collector4 ,to the real collector1 discouragement is never despair4 ,after thinking the matter over1 ,i decided to go about it in the straightforward1 manly way1 instead of adopting the roundabout and involved means ,i have just sketched4 ,there was the house2 the frank thing was simply to go in and see whether or not it contained the treasures that the noble old classic faade seemed to suggest4 ,and this was the course ,i sensibly determined to follow4 ,owing to certain technical difficulties1 ,i was obliged to make my visit after dusk had fallen1 and then only by the inadequate illumination of a small1 patented electric lamp2 nevertheless1 even so hasty and umbrous 7if ,i may use the word7 an examination of the contents of the place as ,i was able to make proved disappointing4 ,the house had been fitted up for tenancy1 not for the owner to live in1 and the collecting of scarce an object in the whole interior paid for the expense of removing it in a small hired vehicle4 ,however1 all houses are not alike2 not even all unoccupied ones1 and it should be emphasized that in this first experience of mine ,i overlooked something of importance4 ,many a time1 afterward1 in examining rental properties and residences offered for sale1 ,i have recalled with a mournful smile that first omission2 and seldom indeed has my patient search gone unrewarded by beautifully patined sections of brass or copper1 perhaps1 and some fine old bit of plumbing4 ,let me say again1 the ,collector's ,eye overlooks nothing1 and the great point is1 not to follow the fad1 but to anticipate it4 ,there is not a single class of antiques that ,i did not collect long before the amateurs began to 8pay prices0 for such things1 and ,i am now principally engaged in collecting the antiques of the future4 ,i know better than anybody else what the priceless old things of the future will be1 because ,i have formed the habit of picking them up at the time when they are thrown out4 99 99 99 99 99 ,now1 let me add just one word upon a bit of old textile now in my possession4 ,i have hanging upon my wall a superb bit of old ,kuppenheimer weaving4 ,people say to me3 8,how in the world did you ever find a piece of that color8 ,we have specimens of ,kuppenheimer1 but ours are not like ,,that6 ,how ,,did you obtain it80 ,i shake my head and smile4 ,a collector's secrets are not for everybody4 ,and yet--and yet1 ,i appreciate the honor that has been done me by the eminent association under the auspices of which this book is compiled1 and ,i will drop just a hint4 ,reader1 your ,kuppenheimer 7in case you are so fortunate as to possess one7 can be of the same faint1 elusive1 subtly napless shade1 if you will treat yours as ,i did mine4 ,and withal1 ,i am compelled to admit that the unique quality of ,,my ,kuppenheimer was the result of an accident4 ,i will tell you part and let you guess the rest--if you can--and if you do guess it1 you will have a ,kuppenheimer worth owning4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,vi ,,old ,,skipworth ,,ware ,dog on paper-weight4 ,from ,baxter's ,dam ,corners1 ,n4,h4 ,i did not obtain my ,kuppenheimer from ,rochester4 ,in fact1 it had passed through several hands before it came to me1 and then1 as it still had that peculiar garment-like quality1 which a real ,kuppenheimer often possesses1 ,i wore it1 myself1 for several seasons4 ,in time the patina began to alter noticeably1 but it was not thus that it acquired the sheen ,i have mentioned4 ,however1 ,i found myself somewhat conspicuous1 and in the autumn of #aiba ,i placed the ,kuppenheimer among my collections1 which ,i keep on the other side of my apartment1 opposite the window4 ,now during the following winter1 ,i happened to notice that the glass in the larger pane of the window became defective1 during an absence of mine upon a collector's excursion4 ,there are a great many boys in my neighborhood1 and ,i am a special favorite among them4 ,one of them1 evidently not knowing of my absence1 had been trying to attract my attention with a large pebble and the window glass had thus been inadequate4 ,without thinking much of the incident1 ,i placed the ,kuppenheimer in a position that would remedy the inadequacy of the window4 ,fellow-collectors1 have you guessed the secret8 ,in the spring ,i found the ,kuppenheimer to be as ,i have described it4 ,that is the true story of what is perhaps not undeservedly known as the ,kilgallen ,kuppenheimer4444 ,i never wear it now1 except upon ,inauguration ,day1 in honor of a new ,president4444 ,people say ,i am trustful to leave the treasure in my apartment when ,i go out1 but the ,kilgallen ,kuppenheimer is much1 much too well known to be stolen4 ,any thief who would even consider such a proceeding1 knows perfectly well what he would get1 too4 -------- ,,the ,,european ,,field ,by ,,professor ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle ,fellow of the ,peloponnesus ,archological ,association2 member of the ,society for the excavation of ,monuments in the ,dodecanese2 ,director of the ,paris ,antique ,armchair ,club2 former ,envoy ,extraordinary and ,minister ,plenipotentiary to ,bessarabia2 and author of ,,the ,,use ,,of ,,worm-,,holes ,,among ,,the ,,ancient ,,egyptians4 -------- ,illustration ,,the ,,european ,,field ,by ,,professor ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,i ,,of ,,the ,,plenitude ,,and ,,intoxicating ,,effect ,,of ,,european ,,antique-,,shops--,,of ,,the ,,large ,,shops ,,and ,,of ,,the ,,small ,,ones ,,smelling ,,of ,,cheese-,,rind--,,and ,,of ,,the ,,numerous ,,stories ,,which ,,are ,,used ,,as ,,encouragement ,,for ,,amateur ,,antique-,,hunters -------- ,,publisher',s ,,note3 ,charles ,a4 ,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s41 because of his wide knowledge of ,european antiques1 was made ,furniture ,polisher to ,king ,ferdinand of ,bulgaria early in #aiac1 retaining his high position for several years4 ,he was decorated with the ,order of the ,holy ,quail1 first class1 for exemplary bravery during the ,rumanian attack on ,tirnova1 when for three consecutive days1 under heavy shell fire1 he remained under a ,louis ,quatorze sofa1 polishing it with as much care as could have been used under normal conditions4 99 99 99 99 99 ,whatever one's bent in antiques may be1 he will find it encouraged in ,europe to a point undreamed of in ,america4 ,antique-shops are as plentiful in every large ,european city as were saloons in ,south ,boston not long ago2 and their contents1 in many cases1 have an equally intoxicating effect4 ,uncultured persons who go into them with the intention of purchasing just one small ,louis ,,xv eggcup will frequently emerge with increased learning and laden down with a ,provenal dough-trough1 a pair of stirrup-irons1 half a dozen ,french prints1 an old leather purse1 four pewter plates1 and a large painting of a vaseful of wild flowers4 ,the streets of ,paris are punctuated with shop-signs which read ,,antiquit,s2 the streets of ,rome and ,florence and ,milan and ,venice are spotted with ,,antichita signs2 just around every corner in ,vienna and ,berlin is an ,,antiquit,,ten shop4 ,the word for antiques is approximately the same in all languages1 as a result1 of course1 of an international agreement between antique-dealers who wish the tourists to enjoy their travels4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,vii ,,professor ,,kilgallen',s ,,magnificent ,,collection ,,of ,,early ,,american ,,utensils1 ,,all ,,hand-,,wrought1 ,,and ,,some ,,obtained ,,from ,,the ,,descendants ,,of ,,the ,,families ,,in ,,which ,,the ,,articles ,,had ,,been ,,handed ,,down ,,from ,,father ,,to ,,son #a4 ,instrument used in making early furniture4 #b4 ,a colonial plastron1 used in disciplining the cattle4 #c4 ,old mantel ornament4 #d and #e4 ,instruments used in disposing of undesirable pottery4 #f4 ,colonial calambosa2 early ,spanish-,american instrument for seeding turnips4 ,the shops start in the expensive shopping districts with the large1 impressive1 brightly lighted establishments where important-looking salesmen remove individual treasures from safes and cupboards1 exhibit them proudly and learnedly1 and quote prices on them that cause a pale green flush to steal over the face of the unsuspecting quester after antiques4 ,they end in the little side streets with small dark shops smelling of a peculiar blend of cheese-rind1 fish-glue and unfinished subways1 in which the pallid proprietors wait with old-world patience for customers to come and fight indefinitely to get a four-dollar article reduced to sixty-five cents4 ,the latter shops1 of course1 are of the greatest importance to the itinerant or catch-as-catch-can antique-hunters2 for it is only in them that one stumbles on something rare and costly that has lain hidden in a shop-corner1 regarded by the shopkeeper as a mere piece of junk--something1 for example1 like one of ,marie ,antoinette's crown jewels or a piece of genuine fifteenth-century arras tapestry or one of ,henry the ,eighth's marriage certificates or a coal scuttle which was used by ,madame du ,barry--something that can be bought for a dollar and a quarter and sold for ten thousand4 ,it is scarcely necessary to point out that the antique-dealer is usually thoroughly conversant with the value of his possessions1 that being his chief business in life4 ,still1 he sometimes makes a mistake1 as do such highly respected oracles as ,senator ,william ,e4 ,borah1 ,david ,lloyd ,george1 and ,benito ,mussolini2 and it should be the aim of every true antique-hunter to encourage him to make all that he can4 ,wherever one moves about in ,european antique-circles1 one is apt to hear the story of the helpless amateur who stumbled into a ,marseilles antique-shop and bought an amber necklace for twenty-five dollars4 ,when he got it home1 he took it to a large jewelry shop to have it valued4 ,the jeweler1 after examining each bead with great care1 offered its owner a thousand dollars for it4 ,this aroused the owner's suspicions1 so he took the beads to an expert and thereupon learned that each bead was engraved ,n ,j in very small letters1 and that it was a string that ,napoleon had given to ,madame ,pompadour as a little token of his esteem4 ,some of those who tell the story declare that the lucky owner sold the beads for ten thousand dollars4 ,others say that he sold them for twenty-five thousand dollars4 ,the most enthusiastic antiquers claim that he received fifty thousand for the string4 ,but a little matter of fifteen or twenty-five thousand dollars should be nothing to amateurs in antiques1 especially when such sums are merely matters of conversation and cost the converser nothing at all4 ,the foregoing story1 and the thousands of others like it that constantly go the rounds in ,paris and ,rome and other antique centres1 are all true2 but certain of the ignorant view them with suspicion4 ,they should never be viewed with suspicion because all the people who tell them almost always state that they happened to friends of personal friends of theirs2 and this1 as is well known1 is always symptomatic of rock-bottom facts4 ,,ii ,,of ,,the ,,ultra-,,satisfying ,,antique-,,shops ,,of ,,italy--,,of ,,the ,,dash ,,and ,,spirit ,,of ,,italian ,,worm-,,holes--,,of ,,the ,,superior ,,shop-,,filling ,,powers ,,of ,,the ,,italian ,,antique-,,dealers ,,over ,,that ,,of ,,the ,,french--,,and ,,of ,,the ,,modern ,,tendency ,,toward ,,crabbedness ,,in ,,the ,,french ,,dealers ,generally speaking1 the antique-shops of ,italy are more satisfactory than those of any other country because of the fire and verve with which the ,italian shopkeepers fight against attempts to make them lower their prices2 because of the inventiveness and resource of the ancient ,italian furniture artists in turning out the best worm-holes known to science2 and because of the enormous number of places where ancient and medival art objects can be bought for as little as eight dollars per object--duplicates obtainable from ,fifteenth ,century craftsmen at a moment's notice4 ,a very charming ,american lady recently declared that of all the ,italian cities1 ,florence was the most fascinating and attractive4 ,she had not1 however1 been fascinated or attracted by the scenery or the architecture or the churches or the picture galleries4 8,why10 she explained1 8you can get antiques there at half the prices that you have to pay in ,rome and about a quarter of what you have to pay in ,paris60 ,this fascinating feature is due to the fact that there are so many ,cinque ,cento artisans still living in ,florence4 ,nevertheless1 the ,french antique-shops are superior in general grace and style to the ,italian because the ancient ,italian workmen now living in ,florence lack a certain dash and spirit which seem to be common to the ,french--except in the matter of making worm-holes4 ,the ,italian worm-holes stand at the very pinnacle of the worm-hole world2 and when an antique ,italian workman really exerts himself to worm-hole a piece of oak1 the ,french workman stands aside in reverential amazement4 ,the ,french workman1 however1 has the dash4 ,before purchasing antiques in ,europe1 one should acquaint himself with the various brands of dash which may be observed in different sorts of furniture4 ,french furniture dash1 for example1 is much dashier than ,bavarian or ,ukrainian dash4 ,czecho-,slovak dash and ,bulgarian dash are quite dissimilar4 ,subscriptions are even now being taken by the ,american ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities to establish classes in furniture dash4 -------- ,donations for this worthy cause may be sent in the form of certified checks1 postage stamps1 or unused golf balls to ,dr4 ,milton ,kilgallen1 ,floral ,park ,city1 ,florida4 ,the average ,italian antique-dealer will crowd into a given space1 say1 four wooden candlesticks made to represent four angels1 two or three ,venetian glass mirrors1 a ,savonarola chair1 seventeen pieces of china1 three wooden chests containing fifty-six square feet of surface and eleven miles of worm-holes1 a dozen venerable and tattered altar cloths1 made by ancient weavers and embroiderers in ,naples in #aiai1 and a few wrought-iron odds and ends removed from a palace in the purlieus of ,pisa by a prominent palace-wrecker4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,viii ,,colonial ,,trigle-,,stool1 ,,discovered ,,in ,a ,,new ,,hampshire ,,woodshed1 ,,and ,,purchased ,,for ,a ,,mere ,,song ,,by ,,professor ,,kilgallen ,as one of the legs was partially missing1 it is believed that the owners considered this rare old piece valueless4 ,professor ,kilgallen has not allowed any restorations to be made4 ,the profane hands of the modern reproducer of old furniture have never been permitted to touch any articles of his collection4 ,in the same space the average ,french dealer seems unable to find room for more than one dough-trough1 two pewter plates with the salamander of ,francis ,i done on them in repouss1 a pair of ,louis ,,xiv curling-tongs1 and a washed-out-looking portrait of a satin-clad and powdered-haired lady whose face has the lop-sided aristocratic appearance that will only be found in true aristocrats or in persons who have been kicked by mules perchance in their early days4 ,and the portraits which are on sale in every ,parisian antique-shop are sometimes most valuable because the general unpleasantness of the aristocrats which they represent serves to make every beholder wonder why the ,french ,revolution didn't start exterminating aristocrats about a hundred years sooner4 ,at any rate1 the superior shop-filling ability of the ,italian dealers is one reason why it is far easier to indulge one's passion for antiqueing in ,italy than in ,france4 ,a disappointing feature about the ,french antique-shops is the apparent indifference of the shopkeepers to the attempts of customers to engage them in violent and interesting altercations over the prices of their wares4 ,this is a modern phase of the antique-business and ranks1 in ,france1 with such inexplainable matters as why man-sized boys wear little tight knickerbockers that come only halfway down to the knee1 and why a ,parisian who apparently lives in comfort in his home or a hotel with the thermometer down to forty degrees will shriek with anguish when any one raises a window in a railway compartment in which the temperature is hovering around ninety-four degrees4 ,in the old days when a ,parisian antique-dealer placed a price of fifteen hundred francs on an article1 the prospective buyer offered five hundred for it1 and then the argument began4 ,the dealer shed tears2 swore that his business standing would be shattered if he dropped a centime in price2 mentioned his sick wife most touchingly2 gave a long history of the antique in question1 showing its great value2 beat his breast and begged the purchaser not to ruin him2 and ended by selling the article for seven hundred francs4 ,to-day1 when a ,parisian dealer places a price of fifteen hundred francs on an article and the customer offers five hundred for it1 the dealer is more than likely to smile quietly but contemptuously1 remark1 8,m'sieu jests10 and refuse to converse further on the matter4 ,this removes the zest from the proceeding4 ,one does not care to purchase antiques as one purchases collars2 one goes elsewhere4 ,,iii ,,of ,,the ,,approved ,,method ,,of ,,doing ,,business ,,with ,,an ,,italian ,,dealer--,,of ,,the ,,artistic ,,deception ,,of ,,the ,,customer--,,of ,,the ,,masterful ,,profanity ,,and ,,the ,,unconvincing ,,asseverations ,,of ,,the ,,dealer--,,and ,,of ,,the ,,ultimate ,,satisfaction ,,of ,,both ,,parties ,the purchase of antiques in ,italy1 in order to be successful1 must be attended with enormous amounts of subtlety1 gesticulation1 swearing1 lying1 and passion4 ,the proceeding is1 or should be somewhat as follows3 ,the antiquer first locates an antique-shop1 which he does by walking along a street until he is struck in the nose by a peculiarly fusty odor1 faintly resembling recently disinterred boots1 and finds the proprietor sitting in a gloomy corner of the shop writing1 or pretending to write1 in a ledger and giving an excellent but unconscious imitation of a large spider observing the approach of a juicy bluebottle fly4 ,the customer greets the proprietor simply but elegantly1 and the proprietor1 going on with his writing1 replies in an apparently perfunctory and preoccupied manner4 ,then the customer proceeds to look about4 ,he notes without interest the worm-eaten sideboards and chests1 the paintings of anmic bunches of flowers1 the bronze mortars and pestles made in ,florence1 the ,venetian mirrors that make the face look as though it had been run through a clothes-wringer1 the venerable priests' vestments and coatments and pantments1 and the hanging silver lamps made out of superb tin2 and finally his eye lights on1 say1 a marble plaque of a ,pope's head from a monastery wall4 ,it has an air1 that plaque4 ,he examines it carefully while pretending to scrutinize a small but offensive painting of ,saint ,mark's by ,moonlight4 ,the buying fever seizes him1 and he prepares for action4 8,have you not a pair of beaten-iron candlesticks in the ,venetian manner1 projecting straight out from the wall80 he asks the proprietor1 making gestures like a candlestick4 ,he asks this question in order to provide a smoke-screen for his future movements4 8,no1 signore10 replies the proprietor gloomily4 8,we had them1 but they were sold yesterday40 8,ah10 says the customer in disappointment4 ,he starts as though to go2 and then1 as an afterthought1 he picks up a bronze mortar and weighs it meditatively4 8,this little thing1 now10 he ventures4 8,the price unquestionably is prohibitive1 eh80 8,a very fine thing1 very old and very fine10 says the dealer1 examining it appreciatively4 8,and very cheap1 signore2 very cheap4 ,four hundred lire only1 signore40 ,the signore laughs loudly and bitterly and turns away with a shudder4 8,cheap60 he ejaculates in scornful tones1 8,cheap6 ,you mistake me for two millionaires4 ,madonna6 ,what a price6 ,for such a thing as that good-for-nothing imitation in the corner1 that pretended ,pope's head1 you would probably charge such an impossible price as one hundred lire60 8,hah60 says the dealer1 staring carefully at the customer4 8,hah60 ,then he goes over to the corner and looks at the ,pope's head as though he were seeing it for the first time4 8,signore10 he says solemnly1 8this is a very fine and very rare piece4 ,it is an historical piece4 ,i will sell it for one tenth of its value40 8,ah1 true80 asks the customer sarcastically4 8,and what is that1 signore80 8,six hundred lire1 signore10 replies the dealer calmly4 8,body of ,bacchus60 gasps the customer1 as though he had been mortally wounded4 8,six hundred lire6 ,are you mad1 signore8 ,it is robbery6 ,the thing is good for nothing6 ,it would be dear at sixty lire60 8,signore10 declares the dealer earnestly1 8your words are an insult4 ,that ,pope is worthy of a museum4 ,look at it1 signore6 ,in the large establishments you would pay six thousand lire for it4 ,signore1 ,i am experienced in the buying and selling of antiques4 ,in selling it at six hundred lire1 ,i am giving it away40 ,the customer shakes his head pityingly4 8,poor little one10 says he1 8that ,pope's head is a forgery4 ,it probably cost six lire4 ,in buying it at all you must have fallen among thieves40 8,signore1 it is not true10 says the dealer indignantly4 8,it is a gift at six hundred lire40 8,pah60 says the customer1 wagging his extended thumb and forefinger at the level of his ear to signify utter contempt and disbelief4 8,then what will you give1 signore80 demands the proprietor in exasperation4 8,name me a fair price and let us speak about it40 8,no10 says the customer1 8,i do not want it4 ,your prices1 signore1 would make a cow weep40 8,then name me a price10 insists the proprietor4 8,come1 name it and let me hear40 8,sixty lire60 shouts the customer defiantly4 8,sixty lire60 wails the proprietor4 8,presence of the ,devil1 signore1 ,i paid five hundred lire for that object4 ,i am a poor man1 signore1 and the thief of a ,government takes everything away in taxes--the luxury tax and the tax for the wounded and the export tax4 ,one must live4 ,come1 signore1 give me five hundred and fifty lire and take it40 8,madonna60 cries the customer in a rage4 8,i would not pay five hundred and fifty lire for a dozen of them4 ,i will give you one hundred lire and not another soldo40 8,ah1 ,madonna60 shrieks the proprietor4 8,you are stealing the bread from the mouths of my children4 ,ah1 my ,god1 but this business is ruining me4 ,no1 ,i will not do it6 ,come1 signore1 take it for five hundred and let us weary ourselves no longer with fruitless talk40 8,it is useless1 signore10 declares the customer firmly4 8,i will not pay your price4 ,come1 now3 here is my last word3 wrap it up and take three hundred lire for it40 8,body of ,bacchus10 moans the proprietor4 8,we cannot deal together1 you and ,i4 ,go to a cheap shop1 signore4 ,i--,i am not a noted dealer1 signore4 ,i cannot do those things4 ,farewell1 signore40 8,three hundred lire10 says the customer firmly4 8,three hundred and fifty10 counters the proprietor4 8,three hundred10 insists the customer hoarsely1 starting toward the door4 ,the proprietor gives his shoulders the tremendous shrug which1 in ,italy1 signifies that the shrugger can do nothing more to prevent you from utterly wrecking yourself by your colossal idiocy4 ,he reseats himself at his desk and paws around among his papers with sudden and complete absorption4 8,three hundred and twenty-five10 says the customer1 holding the door half open and making what the modern school of diplomacy would call a gesture of departure4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,ix ,,cologne ,,cathedral ,,as ,,it ,,is ,,to-,,day ,illustration3 ,,plate ,x ,,new ,,design ,,for ,,cologne ,,cathedral ,the enthusiasm of ,professor ,kilgallen for the pure ,colonial has led him to propose the remodeling of ,cologne ,cathedral4 ,above is a design drawn and submitted to the ,archbishop of ,cologne by the ,professor1 without charge4 ,it is felt that the alterations would give the building a more restful character4 ,the proprietor capitulates1 rolling up his eyes and tossing his hands in the air to show that he accepts misfortune's dread harpoon in a sportsmanlike spirit4 8,you have a bargain1 signore10 says he genially1 rising and unhooking the marble plaque of the ,pope from the wall4 8,to-morrow ,i shall have candlesticks of beaten iron in the ,venetian style4 ,come to-morrow and ,i will sell them to you for nothing40 ,,iv ,,of ,,the ,,similarity ,,between ,,antiques ,,and ,,oil ,,stocks--,,of ,,the ,,confounding ,,of ,,experts ,,by ,,french ,,and ,,italian ,,antique-,,fakers--,,and ,,of ,,the ,,most ,,advanced ,,methods ,,of ,,faking ,the percentage of antiques among the antique-shops of ,paris1 ,rome1 ,florence1 ,berlin1 and ,vienna is said by some to be about the same as the percentage of good investments among the oil and mining stocks of ,america4 ,sometimes an antique is easy to detect1 and sometimes it is not so easy4 ,there are a number of experts who claim to be able to expose a worm-hole that would deceive any worm in the world2 but there are occasions when groups of the most serious and profound experts become embroiled over a particular painting or piece of furniture1 some claiming fiercely that the article in question was produced in #aeai1 and others maintaining noisily that it was done in #aiae4 ,the only satisfactory way in which such a matter could ever be settled would be to have a war over it4 ,large numbers of experts have also gone into ecstasies over certain beautiful ,old ,masters3 expert has purchased a painting from expert1 running up the price at each change of hands until its cost is on a par with that of a new ,town ,hall2 then some low1 coarse1 non-expert has come along with an ,x-ray machine and shown1 by ,x-raying the paint1 that it is so new that its value is somewhat less than that of a dog-house4 ,the best of the renaissance and primitive and seventeenth century artists now producing ,italian and ,french antique paintings are full of quaint conceits for the intriguing 7if one may use so coarse an expression7 of experts on paintings4 ,they welcome the cynical and wary purchasers who start to examine a painting by looking at its back in order to make sure that the canvas is old4 ,they beam affectionately at the suspicious buyers who must have a certain number of cracks to the square inch of surface1 who count the fly specks with loving care1 who test the paint with alcohol in order to find out whether it is new paint or old paint1 and who hunt so assiduously for that rich and mellow golden-brown tone that comes only with age4 ,a golden-brown glow on a painting is a sign that it was painted back in those good old roistering1 swashbuckling days when the most sincere fighters and the noisiest drinkers wore lace frills around the bottoms of their short plush sport-clothes4 ,fortunately the same beautiful effect can be obtained by dissolving licorice in water1 pouring the result on the canvas and rubbing it around for a few moments with the palm of the hand4 ,very beautiful and realistic fly-speck effects may be added by dissolving gum arabic in water1 coloring the liquid with sepia and ,chinese ink1 dipping an ancient toothbrush into it1 and spraying it on the canvas by drawing a match along the toothbrush bristles4 ,the wisest fly that looked at the result would declare unhesitatingly that a yearly fly-convention had been held on the painting ever since ,christopher ,columbus abandoned the flat-earth theory1 and that all the leading speckers of the fly race had tracked their muddy feet on it at one time or another4 ,it's a poor human that can't beat an insect4 ,if it were not for these happy devices the antiques now existing in the world would be arbitrarily limited--a condition of things destructive to the wide dissemination of culture and dismaying to the ,academy for the ,popularization of ,antiquities4 ,fortunately1 paintings may be aged without waiting for years to pass over them4 ,one way is to cook them in hot ovens4 ,another is to take an old1 decrepit painting and paint something more interesting on top of it4 ,or one may take a new painting1 cover the back with glue1 and paste an old canvas over it4 ,some of the most experienced antiquers carry little bottles of alcohol in their breast pockets2 and when they are investigating a picture with great care1 they slyly produce the bottles and surreptitiously pour alcohol over it in order to find out whether or not the colors run4 ,if they run1 the picture is new4 ,if they do not run1 the picture is old4 ,so1 at least1 the experts say4 ,the idea is excellent2 but happily the dealers have learned that if they cover a painting with a sort of transparent glue1 it will resist the action of alcohol and confound the experts4 ,also1 dealers of intelligence have remedied the unkind fate that seemingly limited the work done by ,old ,masters to the paintings they produced in their lifetimes4 ,what could be simpler and yet more beneficial to the patron than to add the signature of an ,old ,master to a painting and let the patron discover it for himself8 ,many of the most priceless ,old ,masters in existence have reached ,america in this way1 and many a millionaire's home would be a gloomier place to-day were it not for this simple but pleasure-giving little device4 ,there are certain technical points about antique-collecting in ,europe that are easily picked up by the antique-collector in two or three years' time4 ,venetian glass1 for example1 breaks more readily than ordinary glass4 ,when in doubt about a piece of ,venetian glass1 strike it one inch from the base with a small hammer1 using a stroke of fourteen foot-ounces to the square inch4 ,if the glass breaks1 it is ,venetian4 ,then there are ,capo di ,monte saucers1 which1 when scaled over the surface of a smooth body of water1 will skip several times more than an ordinary china saucer4 ,one should pick out a broad lake and scale all questionable saucers over its surface with an under-arm motion4 ,a saucer1 if genuine ,capo di ,monte1 should skip at least eight times before sinking4 ,the lake may then be pumped out with a bicycle pump4 -------- ,see ,from ,broad-,axe to ,peanut-,roaster1 by ,emmet ,gilhooly4 ,v ,,of ,,the ,,source ,,of ,,the ,,worm-,,holes ,,in ,,near-,,antique ,,furniture--,,of ,,the ,,latest ,,worm-,,hole ,,machine--,,of ,,the ,,modern ,,method ,,of ,,producing ,,ancient ,,wood-,,carvings ,,in ,,five ,,minutes--,,and ,,of ,,the ,,unlimited ,,furniture ,,owned ,,by ,,marie ,,antoinette ,the collector of antique ,french and ,italian and other foreign furniture is to be congratulated upon other benevolent circumstances that prevent supplies of wonderful old things from approaching exhaustion4 ,so long as there are any ancient houses in ,france and ,italy1 just so long will the manufacturers of ,french and ,italian antiques have enough working material of absolute genuineness4 ,this is due to the fact that the wainscoting and all the concealed woodwork of these venerable houses have been heartily eaten by many generations of true worms4 ,whenever a house is pulled down1 therefore1 the ,old ,masters of furniture-making flock to the scene and acquire large stocks of truly worm-holed wood4 ,this1 when incorporated into the magnificent chests1 tables1 sideboards1 and other pieces which are destined to fill the antique-shops of ,paris1 ,rome1 and ,florence1 catches and holds the eye of the purchaser4 ,it is obvious to any one--or at least to any amateur--that any piece of furniture which contains such intricate and symmetrical worm-holes must have been made before the worms started to bore1 and must1 therefore1 be very ancient4 ,the old1 worm-eaten wainscoting is used to make the shelves and drawer-bottoms of sideboards which are known as credenzas in ,italy and crdences in ,france4 ,it is also drawn on for the backs and bottoms of chests1 for picture-frames1 for wooden stirrups1 and for almost any beautiful1 wonderful old thing ,milady or ,mimister brings home to exhibit upon the sitting-room table4 ,the fronts and tops of chests and sideboards may1 however1 be made of new wood and will probably look just as well4 ,for example1 the new wood can be carved even more prettily than the old1 and when the carving is finished1 the manufacturer turns over the product to three or four muscular hirelings whose sole duty is to injure furniture4 ,they are armed with large sticks of various shapes1 and their activities are limited to chastising the wood with extreme severity4 ,in this way the chests and sideboards acquire1 in a matter of half an hour1 the scratches and indentations for which slow centuries might otherwise be required4 ,the wood is given the proper color by boiling it with walnut rind4 ,or it may be given the peculiar irregularities of great age by applying nitric acid1 which eats into the surface1 and then coloring the marks of the acid with permanganate of potash4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,xi ,,colonial ,,kitchen ,,sink ,,from ,,the ,,old ,,palaver ,,thompson ,,mansion ,,in ,,haverhill ,the metal work1 all done by hand1 is in a remarkable state of preservation4 ,there was no spigot2 but here we find an illustration of the ingenuity of our forefathers4 ,professor ,kilgallen has come to the conclusion that the water was all poured in from a bucket and entirely by hand4 ,the new wood1 of course1 must be carefully worm-holed4 ,the crudest variety of worm-holing is done with a shotgun4 ,the result looks sufficiently wormy to suit the most captious worm-hole collector2 but one can always find a ,number #aj shot at the bottom of each hole4 ,the shotgun method1 therefore1 is not acceptable to members in good standing in our ,society4 ,the worm-hole machine1 which is used by several of the leading ,parisian chineurs1 is a new and excellent invention4 ,its front is a square plate with serpentine grooves in it4 ,when the plate is pressed against a piece of wood and the handle turned1 a number of slender augers push out and make a cluster of worm-holes4 ,a turn of a lever changes the position of each auger slightly1 so that the worm-hole pattern does not recur4 ,but the best worm-holes in the world are made in ,italy by hand4 ,the auger with which they are made is bent in an irregular shape2 and the purchaser of a piece of furniture which has been worm-holed with it is at liberty to thrust wires into the holes in order to investigate their wormy crookedness4 ,the most thorough furniture manufacturers1 knowing that the careful collector will rap on the furniture in order to see whether dust falls from the worm-holes--as would be the case if the hole is the work of a normal worm--should be careful to fill the holes with wood dust4 ,in a number of the antique-shops along the ,rue ,saintes-,pres and the ,boulevard ,raspail in ,paris1 one may see many specimens of carved wooden panels about a foot and a half long and about five inches wide4 ,every one of these has been taken from old chteaux and palaces which have been recently torn down4 ,this statement is obviously reasonable2 for if it were untrue1 practically every chteau in ,france would be standing to-day1 whereas nearly all of them have long since been demolished to provide the great number of wooden panels that have been placed on sale in the past few years4 ,the panels are attractive and not made by great pressure--a method sometimes used in ,france and ,italy in making cheap antiques4 ,pressure-carvings1 as they are called1 always show a bent grain2 whereas the small carvings show a severed grain4 ,but in order to save a few chteaux for tourists to visit1 it was decided to make panels somewhat artificially1 so to speak4 ,that would make a tourist twice happy3 he could visit a chteau and look at the panels2 then he could return to ,paris and buy them to take home4 ,iron moulds were heated until they were white-hot1 and then pressed against very dry wood4 ,when the moulds were removed and the burnt surface brushed with steel brushes1 the wood had the color and the polish and the texture of ancient carvings4 ,a dose of ,number #aj shot from the manufacturer's shotgun supplied the worm-holes for each panel1 after which they were ready to be sold to the travelling public for about four dollars apiece4 ,their cost was approximately forty-five cents--twenty cents for the wood1 twenty cents for the labor1 and five cents for the shotgun cartridge1 and thus an embarrassing problem was solved to the contentment of everybody concerned4 ,articles as large as mantels for generous fireplaces are made by this burning method and passed on to eager collectors at prices that distress the proletariat greatly and cause frequent demands for an equal distribution of wealth4 ,there is a wood-carving company in ,paris which advertises that it will be glad to deliver the furniture of any period to antique-dealers at a moment's notice4444 ,there are workshops of the ,faubourg ,saint-,antoine which produce boule cabinets decorated with birds1 beasts1 and flowers of which ,andr-,charles ,boule might well have been proud4444 ,there are places in ,auvergne where the best ancient artists in the world turn out furniture which ,parisian dealers later are kind enough to guarantee to have been owned by ,marie ,antoinette4 ,there is a true benevolence in all this4 ,culture is spread1 and many people otherwise innocent of history learn that ,marie ,antoinette furniture is similar to that produced under one of the ,louies4 ,it is quite untrue1 however1 that she sent it all over to this country in the ,mayflower4 ,,vi ,,of ,,the ,,violent ,,pewter-,,collector ,,and ,,his ,,patois--,,of ,,the ,,peculiar ,,pastimes ,,and ,,pleasures ,,of ,,the ,,pewter-,,hounds ,,and ,,of ,,the ,,dangers ,,of ,,foreign ,,pewter ,the pewter-collector provides a pleasant source of income to ,european antique-dealers2 for he is one of the most ardent collectors4 ,pewter1 as is well known1 is a base metal made of tin1 to which a small amount of antimony1 copper1 or lead has been added4 ,it was originally made for use in the homes of the wealthy before the days of pottery and china2 then it was used in kitchens of great houses2 churches which couldn't afford gold or silver services had pewter services2 taverns had complete outfits of pewter pots and tankards which could be thrown promiscuously by intoxicated guests without damage to anything except the guests4 ,when properly cleaned1 old pewter has a soft1 silvery lustre that is highly esteemed by all collectors2 and a true pewter-lover will travel many miles for the privilege of handling a pewter plate1 hearing it cry and taking rubbings of it4 ,pewter-collectors speak a technical language which has little or no meaning to persons who have never been exposed to the pewter-germ3 and it is in the antique-shops that one hears the pewter-lovers running on by the hour4 ,the cri d'tain1 or the 8cry of the tin10 is not1 as might be supposed1 the noise which the pewter-collector makes when he finds out the price of a piece of pewter4 ,it is the noise which genuine pewter always makes when the collector holds it close to his ear and bends it backward and forward4 ,pewter always refuses to cry for some people1 but it is certain that there is a cry in it1 just as it is certain that there is a lady in the moon1 though few of them are ever able to see her4 ,all the pewter made in the old days in ,london and ,paris and the ,german cities bore on its back the small private mark of its maker1 due to the fact that a certain standard of metal was required by law4 ,the chief recreation of the pewter-collector is to search out several pieces of pewter1 place tissue paper or tinfoil over a mark1 and then diligently rub the paper or foil with some blunt instrument until a copy of the mark has been transferred to it4 ,two advanced pewter-collectors will squabble for hours as to whether the best rubbings can be made with cigarette-paper and a hard pencil1 or with tinfoil and an ivory penholder1 and as to whether the best results can be got by heating the pewter before taking the rubbing or by leaving it cold4 ,the most excitable pewter-huntsmen keep little books of pewter-rubbings on their persons1 and think nothing of spending two or three hours trying to locate a given mark in their books4 ,if interrupted in this pursuit1 they become violent and use hideous language to the interrupter4 ,they exchange rubbings with each other1 and can spend as much as eight or ten hours in brooding over half a dozen dilapidated pewter plates4 ,when they have hopelessly disagreed over the proper method of taking rubbings1 they can argue for weeks over the best method of cleaning pewter1 which develops an almost impenetrable crust when it lies neglected in a barn for half a century1 as most of the genuine appears to have done4 ,some hold out for ashes and vinegar2 others for boiling with hay2 others for oxalic acid mixed with rotten stone2 others for hydrochloric acid2 others for oxide of tin2 others for ,calais sand and elm leaves2 others for soft soap1 rotten stone1 and turpentine4 ,one of the most delightful things about collecting this metal is that you can experiment for years with pewter without making any progress4 ,the same thing is true1 of course1 of all sorts of antiques4 ,only a short time ago the official expert of the ,french ,government carefully examined a portrait owned by a ,parisian lady1 and pronounced it a genuine ,leonardo da ,vinci4 ,the lady was about to sell it to the ,kansas ,city ,art ,institute for the modest sum of #ejj1jjj1 when another celebrated dealer examined it and declared emphatically that the painting was a copy1 and not a ,leonardo da ,vinci at all4 ,both of the experts had international reputations and should have been qualified to know exactly what they were talking about4 ,the ,kansas ,city ,art ,institute1 however1 decided not to part with its money just then2 and the lady at once sued the second expert for #ejj1jjj4 ,our ,society hopes that when she gets the money she will endow us2 and we have written her to that effect2 but probably she is busy just now4 ,i myself found a gem of a pewter inkwell in a little ,parisian shop one day1 properly marked and battered and time-worn4 ,it had a cylinder for ink1 a cylinder for sand1 and a space for pens2 and its age was declared by the dealer to be one hundred and fifty years4 ,by haggling exhaustively with him1 ,i beat him down from one hundred francs to fifty francs1 and bore off my prize in triumph4 ,when ,i got it home1 ,i examined the interior of the ink-cylinder with an electric torch and discovered that the inside surface was bright and shiny4 ,on a guess1 it was only about eight months old2 but what of that8 ,eight months is eight months1 and what is antiquity1 anyhow8 ,if you ask a geologist you will get one answer2 if you ask a debutante you will get another4 ,as for me1 ,i used a little acid inside my inkwell and hope to dispose of it to a friend4 ,it is already months and months antiquer than when ,i bought it4 ,illustration3 ,,plate ,,xii ,,sampler ,,in ,,the ,,possession ,,of ,,professor ,,kilgallen',s ,,family4 ,,it ,,was ,,the ,,work ,,of ,,the ,,pupils ,,of ,,the ,,professor',s ,,great-,,grandmother1 ,,dame ,,marjorie ,,kilgallen1 ,,of ,,ossippee ,,falls1 ,,and ,,was ,,presented ,,to ,,her ,,by ,,them ,,on ,,the ,,conclusion ,,of ,,her ,,thirty-,,sixth ,,year ,,as ,a ,,teacher ,,in ,,the ,,school ,almost every ,parisian antique-shop will1 if pressed1 produce a pair of pewter plates with the salamander crest of ,francis ,i on the bottom of each plate in repouss work--work done by hammering the under side of the plate until the desired figure is raised on the upper side4 ,these salamander plates are charming and should be bought by the pewter collector4 ,if he gets too many he can always use them for sinkers when fishing--or they may readily be employed as wedding-presents4 ,generally speaking--speaking1 that is1 as our careful advice to the vast body of travellers who wish to take home a few attractive antiques as souvenirs--it is best to make purchases as soon as possible after arriving in ,europe4 ,if one remains there long enough the antiques will be absolutely genuine by the time one gets home4 -------- ,,horsechestnut -------- ,illustration ,,horsechestnut ,,compilers' ,,note ,the subjoined paper1 so happily cast in narrative form1 could not have been omitted from this compilation without gravely lessening at once the charm and value of the work2 its inclusion1 however1 has been arranged only after extraordinary efforts on the part1 not only of the compilers1 but also1 they are happy to testify1 on that of the talented author herself--a figure as impressive and delightful among antiquers as her name1 among critics and patrons of the modern ,american novel1 is authoritative and inspiring4 ,her charming little story1 although read by her in person at the ,march session of the ,academy1 in #aibc1 seemed for a time to be impossible of republication here2 her contract with her publisher1 a person of highly developed commercial instincts1 restrains her from publishing through any other channel1 and in the face of united persuasion on the part of ,professor ,kilgallen and the author herself1 this gentleman has stood firmly on the precise letter of his bargain4 ,fortunately1 however1 the advice of counsel was procured1 with the result that the compilers are permitted to reproduce the paper1 although denied the pleasure and privilege of accrediting it to the author by name4 ,this prohibition would cause them a distress far more acute1 nevertheless1 were they not wholly confident that the identity of the author will be transparently evident to every antiquer and to all lovers of her colorful literary art4 ,i ,the room was subtly instinct with--,james ,femms admitted to an inchoate1 egocentric admonition--default4 ,tormented by an awareness of distress1 alien1 vicarious1 yet poignantly perceptible1 his consciousness opposed1 almost with petulance1 his endeavors to confine it to--in fulfilment of his trust and purpose--spleening4 ,loss2 separation2 sundering--the words formed themselves in characters feathery and funereal as the cross-stitch letter of a ,garfield wall-motto2 they contrived to make themselves1 above the florid1 valiant persuasions of the auctioneer1 audible4 ,there was1 ,james ,femms informed himself1 even an overtone1 as of an adscititious dolor1 inexpressible by any clumsy symbolism of syllables2 he seemed1 indeed1 to experience1 at second-hand1 those first lingual explorations1 incredulous and baffled1 of the wistful void where but the ache and memory of the tooth remain4 ,james ,femms put forth the power of his will against his habit of thinking in such intorted1 raffled inversions as these4 ,confronted by a problem1 he resolved to ratiocinate straightforwardly1 in a manner as candidly unintricate as the spleened finials of the porte-chapeaux which1 at the moment1 engaged the brazen eloquence of the vendor4 ,he would not think1 he decided1 in the style of an ,empire girandole1 but in the direct and honest simplicity of1 say1 that spleened and half-groined becket4 ,this was ,james ,femms1 not as he had been1 but as he had come to be1 a man colored by the years1 so that his glass--a walnut caracole1 wonderfully woodmarked--seemed to invest him with a patina1 so that1 indeed1 he resembled one of those ,victorian antiques1 ornately ruinous1 which were the dominant1 as it were1 of his existence4 ,his passion for the lost art of the period had come to affect him in cunning1 secret ways1 to inform his spirit with a cold flame of rebellion against himself and his environment2 he detested his body1 designed1 he reflected bitterly1 after the ,roycroft manner and as innocent of decorative values2 he abandoned1 in his moments of surrender1 the artless names which had been foisted on his helpless infancy2 he ceased to think of himself as ,james ,femms1 and softened1 mellowed1 ornamented the harsh1 stern sounds with ,gallic fancies4 ,in his dreams he became a figure of romance1 pinch-waisted1 nobly whiskered1 an illustration from a time-stained page of 8,godey's ,lady's-,book10 a man who could bear1 with corseted grace1 a name like ,jambes des ,femmes6 ,he became1 for the time being1 this ,jambes des ,femmes2 he looked about him with the very elegance and grace of a des ,femmes4 ,the salon1 he observed1 was filled by people for whom ,jambes des ,femmes must feel no more than a gently supercilious distaste2 there were faces familiar enough to ,james ,femms3 ,kitchler1 the bulbous1 raffish dealer1 one sienna eye cocked contemptuously at the porte-chapeaux1 a fleshpot finger lifted in token of a careless bid2 there were others as foreign to the mood of ,jambes des ,femmes--sly1 chaffering professionals and the inevitable scattering of amateurs4 ,here1 he concluded1 there was no one capable of setting up in him those telepathic vibrations of which1 baffled and distrait1 he was obstinately aware4 ,his glance moved back to the porte-chapeaux4 ,he had examined it1 of course1 before the sale and decided1 with a lingering regret1 to make no offer for it4 ,horsechestnut--he discarded the coarse term2 ,james ,femms must use it1 when he spoke1 but ,jambes des ,femmes might think in more gracious wise3 noisette cheval--it was a fine piece1 des ,femmes admitted1 a magnificent affair1 save for but the one fatal defect4 ,and he had always1 he reflected1 adored noisette cheval4 ,again he was pervaded by the haunting awareness of an elusive1 poignant melancholy4 ,his eyes moved to the spurious becket--to the discerning scrutiny of ,james ,femms a palpable counterfeit1 a thing so obvious and crude that even ,kitchler1 with the three originals to scream their warning1 might have noticed it--not even hand-wrought groining1 des ,femmes pronounced1 a clumsy fraud1 grouted1 at a guess1 and bench-gammoned to trick the eye of ignorance6 ,it seemed to des ,femmes that his atrabilious depression found its focus here4 ,he lifted himself to see more clearly2 was it--could it be--that he felt the yearning of those sundered parts1 the shame and longing of the porte-chapeaux for that ravished becket8 ,had his sympathy1 his passion for noisette cheval refined his perceptions to a delicacy so incredible1 so splendid8 ,he dallied wistfully with the thought and put it from him4 ,not even ,jambes des ,femmes could have attained a receptivity so exquisite4 ,suddenly1 as the voice of the auctioneer became premonitory1 ,james ,femms moved in his chair4 ,he remembered ,sonoff6 ,as if hours instead of years were overlaid upon the recollection he could see that porte-chapeaux in ,sonoff's entresol1 its lovely amber tone warmed by the crimson wall6 ,it was ,sonoff's6 ,jambes des ,femmes saw him1 as he had been--,sonoff the debonair1 high on the crest of his wave1 ,sonoff1 the greatest artist of his time6 ,and now--abruptly1 ineludibly1 came the thought--and now1 even the art was dead6 ,dead4 ,since that day of ,sonoff's greatness men had been born1 lived out their lives1 died1 without knowing that the art had ever lived6 ,jambes des ,femmes tasted the bitterness of it2 he saw ,sonoff1 behind the great rtelier of bells1 his hands flashing like the lustres of bobches on a girandole1 from the elfin-tinkling tinniness of the soprano to the rugent clamor of the bass6 ,sonoff1 a ,russian1 had taught the ,swiss their place6 8,grandes fromages10 ,sonoff would say4 8,let them yodel60 ,and now--6 ,sonoff1 beggared1 reduced to the shrewd torment of testing the timbre of telephone bells for a niggard pittance1 and ,sonoff's porte-chapeaux1 degraded and disfigured by that pinchbeck becket1 going1 for the last1 third time to ,kitchler6 ,james ,femms lifted his catalogue4 ,,ii ,the bassines1 at least1 ,james ,femms admitted1 were good4 ,sound bronze--he stiffened as memory quickened in him4 ,gently his finger-nail tapped their margins and a hushed whispering resonance seemed to bring an audible perfume into the chamber4 ,james ,femms nodded4 ,it had been ,sonoff's whimsy to have these bassines cast and toned in bell-metal--one to sound the low ,a flat and the other the ,d that ,sonoff had loved best of all his bells4 ,the bassines1 at least1 were possible under ,james ,femms's roof4 ,but the porte-chapeaux itself1 with a fraudulent becket8 ,james ,femms negated the suggestion with a resolute1 peremptory movement of his head4 ,he set his shoulder to the task of thrusting the piece before him to the open porch4 ,he closed the door upon it4 ,except for the bassines1 it would have been better1 after all1 to let ,kitchler have it2 perhaps1 even now1 he could let ,kitchler persuade him to part with it--not too easily1 of course2 it would be simple to pick up another pair of bassines1 in place of these4 ,there were two in ,reading1 ,femms remembered1 and1 he thought1 another pair in a junk-shop on the edge of ,camden4 ,yes1 he would let ,kitchler have it1 at a price4 ,he lifted the two bassines and brought their edges softly together1 inclining his head to catch the moonlit fragrance of their conjoined note4 ,he carried them to his bedroom2 he would keep them here1 on either side of the ,benjamin ,harrison bureau4 ,he set them on the twin plackets that jutted out from the mirror-frame4 ,,iii ,sleep eluded ,james ,femms4 ,isolated in umbrageous stillness1 the grosser sensory reactions no longer obstructed the reception of what1 he now conceded1 must be the telepathic apperceptions of sixth or seventh sense4 ,below the coverlet his body1 resentful under mysterious reproaches from without1 expressed its unrest in gyratory saltations2 his mind ached and quivered in sympathy with baffling emotions of which his awareness was so acute that it all but equalled experience itself4 ,he was cognizant1 dimly but with certitude1 of a relation between these sufferings and the presence1 the propinquity1 at least1 of the porte-chapeaux that had been ,sonoff's4 ,again he contemplated the hypothesis that understanding and affection had established between ,james ,femms and the inanimate objects of his passion1 a rapprochement1 a rapport analogous to1 if not identical with1 the sympathy that unites the sundered halves of a spiritual union4 ,below1 from the doorstep1 the porte-chapeaux of ,mikail ,sonoff seemed1 to ,james ,femms1 to upraise a muted ululation1 a sound of exquisite desire1 as pitiful and penetrant as the call of the widowed wood-dove4 ,he came1 at last1 to the window1 a panel of translucent pressed glass surrounded by a bordure of plaquettes1 each of a different primary color1 now delicately diminished in the pallor of a moon as cold1 ,femms thought1 as the belly facet of a flounder4 ,he slept with the window1 after the mode which he sensed intuitively would have been that of ,jambes des ,femmes1 closed4 ,lifting it1 now1 and shivering in the humid inrush of nocturnal airs1 he identified the crooning note2 the leprous1 unchaste cry of feline concupiscence4 ,femms's sibilant ejaculation motivated a flitting shadow2 the gashed silence seemed to lick its wounds2 there was stillness1 but not1 for ,james ,femms1 peace4 ,illustration3 ,,the ,,porte-,,chapeaux ,,of ,,noisette ,,cheval 8,rising in the night1 troubled over the yearning of the bassines to be reunited to their original source40 ,rising1 later in the night1 convinced at last that his spirit was troubled by the yearning of the bassines to be reunited to their original source1 he bore them down and left them in the embrace of the porte-chapeaux4 ,sleep coquetted with him1 now1 a sleep of caprice1 through which1 more remotely1 ,james ,femms continued to respond to that inanimate yearning1 palliated but still passionately unsatisfied4 ,,iv ,a dawn of gusts1 with spurts of disingenuous rain1 revived ,james ,femms2 dressing1 he avoided the candor of his glass1 harried now by a recurrent thought of ,sonoff4 ,he seemed1 indeed1 to see the old sonneur1 abroad in this malicious weather1 his battered parapluie1 its proper service forgotten1 serving him but as a staff1 his garments maculate with party-colored inlays1 his glorious hair unhatted4 ,distantly1 elusively1 ,james ,femms sensed1 now1 a relationship between his inchoate mental gropings and that whimsy of ,mikail ,sonoff4 ,he knew that the old musician1 his ears envenomed by the clack of telephone bells1 suffered hideously from headache1 but did he1 ,james ,femms demanded of himself1 walk bareheaded in the rains to cool that throbbing capital1 or was it1 perhaps1 because of some sentiment less practical--because of some profound attachment to a hat1 too deeply loved1 which1 lost at last1 had moved ,sonoff to vow1 in this respect1 perpetual celibacy8 ,or was it4448 ,james ,femms1 percipient though he was1 must have failed to draw that gossamer inference2 it was an inspiration worthy of the finesse of ,jambes des ,femmes himself6 ,he saw1 now1 with a sudden utter certitude1 that ,sonoff bared his splendid finial to the elements because a hat1 any hat1 must have revived and deepened his yearning for the porte-chapeaux1 the porte-chapeaux of noisette cheval that symbolized all the grace and splendor of ,sonoff's ravished youth6 ,illustration3 8,,he ,,knew ,,the ,,old ,,musician ,,suffered ,,from ,,headaches1 ,,but ,,did ,,he ,,walk ,,bareheaded ,,in ,,the ,,rain ,,to ,,cool ,,his ,,head ,,or ,,perhaps ,,because ,,of ,,some ,,profound ,,attachment ,,to ,a ,,hat ,,he ,,had ,,once ,,owned8 ,,had ,,he ,,lost ,,it1 ,,perhaps1 ,,and ,,vowed ,,never ,,to ,,have ,,another80 ,and1 as if the ghostly emanations of the porte-chapeaux had sought him out in whatever beggar's den now harbored his decay1 had called him forth and guided him hereward1 ,sonoff himself passed before ,james ,femms's window1 a figure of compassion1 a spectacle as insidiously saddening as that ,wagner ,palace ,car which ,james ,femms had once beheld degraded to the indignity of a nocturnal1 nickel restaurant4 ,james ,femms cried out to him1 the sacrifice already made4 ,sonoff should have it for his own again1 without money and without price6 ,v 8,headache8 ,and what head would not ache1 good little ,jambes des ,femmes80 ,james ,femms remembered that it was ,sonoff's quaint pronunciation of his detested name that had first suggested the thought of changing it1 in his secret meditations1 to the softened grace1 the ,parisian flavor1 of ,jambes des ,femmes4 ,a rush of gratitude welled in him4 8,sonoff--,i have guessed40 ,he laid his hand horizontally above the pocket where he carried his priceless stylograph1 filigreed in the very flower of the ,rutherford ,b4 ,hayes manner4 8,it is the heart that aches4 ,and ,i have found the cure4 ,come60 ,silently he led the antique sonneur through the entresol and to the porch4 8,there60 ,he flung his hand in a wide1 fine gesture4 ,sonoff blinked4 8,mon porte-chapeaux40 ,he spoke with no zest1 no vestige of his quondam joie de vivre4 8,i tired of it1 ,jambes40 8,take it4 ,i give it back to you60 ,james ,femms repeated the wide arc of his flourish4 8,but ,i no longer want it40 ,sonoff shook his head and raised a hand to it as if in sudden pain4 8,i wear no 'at1 mon brave ,jambes4 ,the pain--ah60 ,again his features were intorted4 8,you won't take it80 ,james ,femms disbelieved4 ,surging up in his consciousness1 innegable1 compelling1 he felt that conviction of mute1 poignant yearning for reunity which had obsessed him from the first4 8,i cannot4 ,it saddens me to behold it4 ,it stirs1 mon vieux1 memories4 ,ah--the pain--the pain40 ,he pressed spatulate fingers to his temples and a groan forced passage between his teeth4 8,it comes back to me at the sight40 8,it makes your head ache--the porte-chapeaux80 ,james ,femms regarded him incredulously4 ,illustration3 ,,the ,,becket 7,,actual ,,size7 ,note #a4 ,the perfect hand-wrought groining4 ,note #b4 ,observe the accurate spleening of the old handicraftsmen4 8,but yes4 ,it was then that they began1 the headaches--the night that the becket lost itself4 ,i woke1 that day1 happy2 they had listened1 enfin1 those adder-deaf imbeciles of the telephone2 the bells were tuned at last to the ,f sharp2 ,i was free from the ignominy of the ,e---- ,i sang1 that day1 my friend4 ,i was gaie6 ,i laughed as ,i snatched up my hat from the becket where1 of old habit1 ,i had hung it4 ,lightly1 as a schoolboy is light1 ,i placed it on my head2 ,i tilted it2 ,i was myself1 the self that took them by storm that night in ,philadelphia when ,i rang the overture from #8,wilhelm ,tell1' using my feet for the basso profundo6 ,all day among my new bells ,i was that self4 ,and at night1 returning with song in my heart and a tin of caviare and a carache of vodka below my arms1 ,i was that self4 ,but ah1 when ,i would have slept--the pain--the pain1 mon ,jambes6 ,i shudder at the thought of it6 ,i walked the floor in torment1 as how often ,i have walked it since40 ,he pressed his temples again4 8,and it was while ,i walked that ,i observed the vanishment of the becket4 ,it was gone4 ,i do not know where1 nor how--,i only know that the sight of the porte-chapeaux was hateful4 ,i could not endure to behold it4 ,i sold it1 and the pain1 if no less1 was easier to bear40 ,james ,femms heard him as one who listens to the opaque ventriloquial speech of dreams4 ,dimly1 remotely1 but with a dawning fervor of conviction1 understanding burst in upon him4 ,he lifted his hands in a swift1 furtive movement2 his fingers penetrated the plush-like silky depths of ,sonoff's hair4 ,they closed upon a surface that ,james ,femms knew as intimately by touch as if his eyes beheld it through his worm-hole lens4 ,delicately1 with the merciful cruelty of the surgeon1 disregarding the anguished shriek of his patient1 he drew forth the missing becket4 ,a profound1 shuddering sigh came from ,sonoff4 ,with hands that thrilled voluptuously at the delicious caress of that spleened surface1 but still were swift and sure to their task1 ,james ,femms replaced the becket in its emplacement and stood back1 his eyes intoxicated with the charm of the perfect spleen-craft1 the cool1 proud beauty of the hand-groined base4 ,the ether1 like a restless1 moaning sea upon which an instant calm descends1 was permeated with a vast1 abiding peace4 ,sonoff clasped ,james ,femms to him1 kissed his cheeks4 ,illustration3 ,,profile ,,view ,,of ,,the ,,porte-,,chapeaux ,,of ,,noisette ,,cheval ,,reconstructed ,,and ,,in ,,use ,i4 ,the lost becket4 ,,ii4 ,bassine 8,the pain6 ,it is gone6 ,ah1 mon cher ,jambes des ,femmes--what can ,i say to you--how shall ,i repay you80 ,james ,femms said nothing4 ,his eyes1 held and fascinated1 drank in the fragrant loveliness of the amber noisette cheval1 thrilled under the thin1 silvery aroma of its melodious oneness4 ,he was but distantly aware of a voice1 ,sonoff's voice1 far-away1 elfin-sweet with the echoes of a hundred blending bells4 8,keep it1 ,jambes des ,femmes1 keep it always in proof and token of my gratitude6 ,keep it1 des ,femmes1 in memory of ,mikail ,sonoff ,sonoffovitch60 ,james ,femms did not know that he had gone4 -------- ,a ,,word ,,on ,,pooning ,by ,,augustula ,,thomas -------- ,illustration ,a ,,word ,,on ,,pooning ,by ,,augustula ,,thomas ,note3 ,this work would be incomplete1 indeed1 without a few suggestions from one-who-understands and has long been the authority on pooning4 ,pooning is a highly technical term and may perhaps need definition for the benefit of laymen4 ,its significance is subtle1 lying between that of 8properly placing0 and the sense conveyed by the ,italian phrase 8,dove il dogagna40 ,many true lovers of the quaint-and-rare possess the patience and the means to make collections1 but1 when it comes to the tasteful pooning of these1 lack the connoisseur touch that is distinctive4 ,madame ,thomas's position as a scholarly decorator is now recognized as impeccable4 ,her hints will prove lambent to many a collector4--,eds4 99 99 99 99 99 ,a witty ,frenchman once said to ,madame de ,montespan that the feminine touch in decoration was para cli1 but without half measures6 ,not pausing to debate the aspersion1 ,i may admit that ,i have usually found it more sympathetic to direct the replacing of beautiful old things in the houses of bachelor and widower collectors than in those of somewhat more matronly people4 ,after which treachery to my sex1 let me proceed at once to the practical4 ,enfin6 ,illustration3 ,,reception ,,held ,,by ,,the ,,american ,,academy ,,for ,,the ,,popularization ,,of ,,antiquities ,,on ,,the ,,lawn ,,before ,,the ,,academy',s ,,building ,,at ,,the ,,san ,,francisco ,,exposition ,this reception was in honor of the election of ,mme4 ,augustula ,thomas to membership4 ,mme4 ,thomas is seen right of center in conversation with ,turrbyl ,dewyns 7,fellow of the ,academy71 who wears the blue ribbon awarded by the ,exposition as first prize for antiquarians4 ,just eastward of him ,hon4 ,p4 ,d4 ,smith 7,member of ,congress from ,arkansas7 is seen courteously lifting his hat to ,dr4 ,twitchett in recognition of the latter's talents4 ,to pronounce my creed1 which is synthetic and never subjective1 a priori3 ,why own priceless marvels unless they are where they may be seen8 ,why lock up ,coriobantini enamels1 for instance1 in a damp closet8 ,the first thing ,i do1 upon being put in charge of a collection1 is to throw the vitrines out of the house4 ,i shall never forget the amazement of the late ,darrell ,hazzard1 of ,hartford1 when ,i thus ruthlessly began my work upon his treasures4 8,what60 he exclaimed4 8,expose my faence1 my ,louis ,treize snuff-boxes1 my ,antoinette miniatures to the careless handling of every chance visitor8 ,this is radicalism with a vengeance1 dear lady6 ,i suppose next you will be placing my snuff-boxes and miniatures upon the living-room table60 8,tush60 ,i replied serenely4 8,they are to occupy your front veranda railing40 ,i had noticed that the railing was flat and within a few feet of the sidewalk1 an ideal location for the priceless little objects1 and there ,i had them placed4 ,for that was where they would give the most pleasure--and it will be well for the reader to intrigue himself with the significance of this simple rule3 ,put your things where they will give the most pleasure4 ,i am often asked the secret of my success1 and ,i always reply with two words3 8,simplicity6 ,pleasure60 ,it is a mistake to clutter1 as even the most cadavre of amateurs is aware4 ,a touch here2 a touch there--and for the rest1 no cluttering6 ,i have always considered the ,metropolitan ,museum a dismaying example of cluttering4 ,one work of art is enough for one room4 ,when ,i remodelled the ,rockford collection of ,chinoiseries ,i selected just one antique absinthe-colored jade ,buddha1 which was exactly an inch and three sixteenths in height1 half an inch wide and three eighths of an inch in thickness4 ,i then decided upon one of the gallery exhibition rooms1 seventeen feet in height with a floor space sixty-four feet by twenty-six1 admirable proportions for my purpose4 ,i had the floor and walls lacquered a neutral mauve1 and then placed the jade ,buddha in the exact centre of the floor and without a pedestal4 ,not even a chair or a settee was permitted within the room2 the walls were without any adornment whatever1 and the attention of spectators was thus concentrated upon the one work of art present1 the jade ,buddha4 ,the effect1 though slightly ,dada and austere1 was considered serene and redolent of that allure of restfulness which is distinctive4 ,almost precisely similar to this was my treatment of a pair of signed ,louis ,seize candle-snuffers of chased silver1 formerly the property of ,judge ,bunting ,palliphet1 of ,peterborough1 ,virginia1 whose ancestors entertained ,rochambeau4 ,a well-authenticated family legend had it that the snuffers were in the ,count's portmanteau1 which he was unable to find at the moment of his departure from ,palliphet ,manor2 and thus it became an heirloom of the ,palliphet family4 ,the snuffers are now in the possession of ,mrs4 ,george ,woll ,potter1 of ,jersey ,city1 who visited the ,manor in #ahii1 during the absence of the ,palliphet family1 and it was in doing over the ,potter house that ,i perceived the proper decorative value of these historic snuffers4 ,i had a simple bit of neutral-toned rope hung between two posts outside the library windows2 and suspended the snuffers therefrom1 forming a vista of approach to them with two perfectly symmetrical rows of arborvitae in black-and-white tubs4 ,the effect was harmonious and yet did not lack that touch of originality which gives the right note at the right moment4 ,how few people understand what may be done with a simple pair of brass candlesticks6 ,does not one weary of seeing them eternally upon a mantel8 ,upon a top bookshelf8 ,upon the gate-leg table8 ,upon a set-in window-sill8 ,there we find them invariably1 driving us mad with their monotony1 when only a slight exertion of the imagination would give them the touch that is different1 the charm that is permanent4 ,i have found that it is only necessary to place one such candlestick in the front yard and the other in the back yard to give them a setting that is in keeping4 ,thus they can be seen from the windows1 their sheen rich against the out-of-doors1 except at night2 and then1 if it seems desirable1 they may be lighted4 ,it is not necessary to bring them in when it rains4 ,a light water-proof canopy1 easily removable1 may be placed over them and will be found to give complete protection1 and even to add a note of color1 if glazed with silver-gilt1 the right shade of apricot and just touched with cerise4 ,now a word of confession3 it is not always the easiest thing in the world to go into a house and give it the right decorative note4 ,the owners may have their own ideas and one must move tactfully4 ,let me give an instance1 though the gentleman in question shall be nameless and designated merely as ,general ,x4 ,he was a delightful man1 elderly1 a retired army officer1 a manly and gallant widower1 notwithstanding the fact that he possessed strong convictions that his own taste was excellent4 ,he had gathered about him from all parts of the world a valuable assembly of antiques1 bibelots1 paintings1 stuffed animals1 sculptures1 seashells1 wood-carvings1 miniatures1 and petiteries1 but had so misplaced them in his halls and living-room and even in his master's rooms that one saw nothing but a heterogeneity of clutter4 ,i began with his master's rooms4 ,i went through one after another of these1 ordering everything--absolutely everything--removed to the garrets and cellars4 ,then1 when all was clear1 ,i had my assistants place one old ,tutu ,japanese print in each of his master's rooms--nothing more--and awaited the ,general's return1 for he was out at the time4 ,he was not at first able to comprehend that the new arrangement was intended to be permanent4 8,well10 he remarked1 smiling pleasantly1 8,i see you have made a beginning1 ,madame ,thomas40 8,no10 ,i smiled4 8,i have made a conclusion4 ,your master's rooms are finished4 ,they now have that restfulness1 that air intime which your master's rooms lacked until ,i retouched them4 ,this is how they are to remain1 ,general40 ,he was dumbfounded4 8,but ,i miss everything to which ,i have been heretofore accustomed60 he cried1 with charming navete4 8,in my master's rooms were my favorite claw and ball feet1 my inlaid knees1 my carved knees1 all my knees of curly maple and walnut6 ,here were my bottle drawers1 my swell fronts1 my double-swell fronts1 my ,jacob's-ladder fronts1 my serpentine fronts--all the fronts ,i had6 ,i wish my fronts and knees put back the way they were4 ,i won't have my master's rooms as empty as this60 8,this is how they are to be1 however10 ,i made retort serenely4 8,there is no alternative40 8,what60 he exclaimed1 and his face became seriously empurpled4 8,you mean to say ,i have no control over my own master's rooms8 ,i want all my bibelots and petiteries back where ,i put them1 myself4 ,my master's rooms are my own master's rooms1 and not yours1 are they not1 pray80 8,my dear ,general10 ,i replied1 8,i know what your master's rooms should be and you do not4 ,you do not see beauty in them now--perhaps you will not to-morrow--but wait6 ,within a week or ten days you will begin to feel the restful harmony ,i have put into them and you will be grateful40 8,i won't6 ,i won't6 ,i won't60 he said1 stamping his foot pettishly4 8,i want my bow-backs and my fan-backs back where they were1 and ,i'm sorry ,i ever put my master's rooms into your hands6 ,i do just wish ,i'd never seen you at all1 ,madame ,thomas60 ,it was then that ,i perceived ,i must use diplomacy1 and ,i admit that if ,i had not been conscious of wearing a becoming hat1 ,i might have lacked the courage4 ,i put my hand lightly on his arm and looked full into his reddened eyes4 8,general10 ,i said softly1 8,i have labored hard over your master's rooms4 ,surely1 mon ,gnral1 you would not have my task undone60 ,then1 seeing that he began to melt1 ,i drew a little closer to him2 and he set his manly brown paw over my slender fingers1 smiled at me1 and coughed4 ,i comprehended that the moment had come to use my utmost diplomacy4 8,oo drate bid naughty handsome mans60 ,i said playfully4 8,if ,i had a dun ,i'd shoot oo1 bang60 ,it is perhaps scarcely necessary to add that his master's rooms remained as ,i had done them1 and that the dear old ,general and ,i are still the best of friends4 99 99 99 99 99 ,and now a few 8,don'ts10 as ,i call my little inhibitions4 ,some of them are culled from my own experience and are rather technical1 being intended for the use of the beginning professional decorator1 who is but too prone to find her path not always strewn with roses1 by any means4 ,others of these little 8,don'ts0 of mine are for the guidance of those who1 unable to afford the counsel of established experts1 must fall back upon their own taste and what they may be able to cull from tomes upon the subject4 ,but let us see for ourselves what my 8,don'ts0 portend6 ,don't1 in arranging your bookshelves under the arch in the living-room1 place your editions of ,boccaccio1 ,brantme1 ,rabelais1 and ,casanova on the same shelf with ,burton's 8,arabian ,nights10 8,the ,heptameron10 ,balzac's 8,droll ,stories10 and your bound files of 8,saucy ,stories0 and 8,le ,rire40 ,the place for all of these volumes is the centre-table2 or they may be scattered about the house anywhere1 so that they are handy for the children to get at them4 ,don't fasten coat-hangers upon the wall just above valuable water-color paintings4 ,wet raincoats may cause the colors to run4 ,if your wall-space is limited1 the hangers should be placed above oil paintings4 7,note3 ,this rule1 being somewhat technical1 need not be studied by the amateur4 ,i should advise the beginning professional decorator1 however1 to pay particular attention to it1 and even to con it until it is committed to memory4 ,the place for coat-hangers is never over a water-color painting47 ,illustration3 ,,old ,,virginia ,,four-,,poster ,,inlaid ,,with ,,mahogany ,still in use by a private collector ,don't adhere too closely to periods4 ,if you have acquired a few good pieces of ,egyptian furniture of the ,shepherd ,king ,period for your living-room1 they may be easily combined with ,sheraton or ,eastlake by placing a ,ming vase or an old ,french fowling-piece between the two groups2 or you may cover the transition by a light scattering of ,mexican pottery1 or some ,java wine-jars4 ,don't hang your ,boucher pastels on the same wall with your stuffed moose-head4 ,the proper place for the moose-head is over the shower-bath1 where it can be fitted by any good plumber with a nozzle and used as a fixture4 ,don't attempt to do too much in the boudoir4 ,the boudoir is a place for restful repose and should be kept quiet4 ,a few simple hangings1 a coquettish rosette or two of bright-colored ribbon attached to the shutters1 a pince-nez over the mantelpiece1 a couple of ,waterford crystal chandeliers with a light rod of dull brass between them from which to suspend either a samovar or an old ship model--these touches will be found sufficient to combine the charm of an intimate interior with the lure that intrigues4 ,don't attempt to use alfalfa as a decoration for mirror- and picture-frames4 ,i know that this has been widely attempted1 but the effect is never good4 ,alfalfa has no place in the best interiors4 ,its place is out-of-doors and it should be kept there4 ,this is a point upon which ,i have the strongest convictions1 and what ,i usually say to beginning decorators who insist upon using alfalfa in the home is answer sufficient1 ,i am sure4 8,do you expect your client to entertain horses80 ,i inquire4 8,if not1 then the place for alfalfa is where it will be convenient for the horse1 but not in the living-room and not in the reception-room4 ,no1 not even in the entresol40 ,i admit that there was a charm in the customs of our ancestors under ,garfield and ,arthur1 when cat-tails and sumach were thus employed1 and ,i find the tendency to return to them rather intriguing2 but alfalfa produces an effect too stringy and tends to clutter4 ,let us have no more of it4 ,finally1 don't paint your front hall water-cooler with floral scenes4 ,go to some good marine painter and instruct him to make a decoration in keeping with the purpose of the cooler4 ,there is water inside the vessel1 is there not8 ,then let him paint water outside4 ,better still1 coat your cooler with mucilage and lightly spray powdered mica upon it4 ,but don't1 whatever you do1 attempt to ornament your cooler with festoons of gilt tassels4 ,your cooler is not the place for tassels4 ,i know it is done1 but my last and only word on the subject is1 ,don't4 ,tassels of any kind are absolutely out of key on your cooler4 ,they should be kept for your umbrella1 where they will give that personal touch that is distinctive4 ,these constitute most of what dear old ,general ,x used frolicsomely to call my 8little ,don'ties10 and if they prove of some inspiration to the beginning decorator or even to the commencing householder1 this work will not have been written in vain4 ,illustration -------- ,,other ,,books ,,for ,,the ,,antique-,,lover ,,by ,,osro ,t4 ,,newdleham ,,the ,,hair-,,cloth ,,era ,a ,book of ,furniture-,study for ,young ,people ,containing #af full-page ,illustrations in color1 also #aad ,reproductions in color of hair-cloth seats1 as well as numerous ,illustrations in the text4 ,large crown #hvo41 bound in hair-cloth ,by ,post1 #c_/aj ,,price #c_/f ,,net ,by ,post1 #c_/aj ,some ,press ,opinions 8,this pleasantly written book is well fitted to arouse in young people an interest in the study of hair-cloth and other furniture1 while many of the older growth will probably find in its pages much that is not unprofitable reading4444 ,the chief difference between this book and most others on ,furniture is the prominence which it gives to distinguishing the different grades of hair-cloth by sitting on them4444 ,copiously illustrated40 ,athenum4 8,mr4 ,newdleham's agreeable1 interesting and instructive volume4444 ,it should attract not only young people1 but any one looking for an easy introduction to hair-cloth furniture40 ,scotsman4 8,comprehensive though it is1 it has been planned on clear and simple lines4 ,the terms used are1 to begin with1 non-scientific1 though leading by natural1 simple process to the proper scientific words4444 ,the author writes in a free1 bright and fascinating style4444 ,one can imagine himself to be sitting on a hair-cloth seat1 slipping gracefully from one thought to another40 ,meguntic ,news4 8,this fascinating volume40 ,dundee ,dud4 8,i wish in #f-point type to cheer a ,book upon the ,hair-,cloth ,era40 ,f4 ,b4 ,a4 in the ,new ,york ,whirl4 ,,how ,,to ,,use ,,the ,,polishing ,,rag ,containing #bj full-page ,illustrations from ,photo-micrographs1 and many ,line-,drawings in the ,text4 ,large crown #hvo41 bound in cloth which may be detached and used as polishing-rag or shew-cloth ,by ,post1 #a_/i ,,price #a_/f ,,net ,by ,post1 #a_/i ,some ,press ,opinions 8,there are several cheap books on the polishing rag before the public1 but we do not know a better than the one now under consideration40 ,boston ,transcript4 8,this is a rotten book4 ,it is reactionary throughout4 ,somebody ought to shoot the author40 ,the ,new ,republic4 8,elaborate explanations are carefully avoided1 except in the recipes for furniture polish4 ,the reader who patiently works through these different recipes1 especially the one on how to make sherry-flavored polish out of scored prunes1 will have an accurate and worth-while knowledge of the possibilities of furniture polishing40 ,the ,police ,gazette4 ,,crossing ,,the ,,antique ,,dealer ,,by ,m4 ,,spickering ,,queek ,containing #h full-page dress-patterns for concealed pockets1 and #ej smaller designs for home-made brass-knuckles1 tear-gas and slung-shots4 ,large square crown #hvo41 gilt top ,by ,post1 #e_/d ,,price #e_/- ,,net ,by ,post1 #e_/d ,these stories of outwitting the antique-dealer in city1 village and country will be read with much zest by all lovers of the antique4 ,they are brightly written1 and are the outcome of long experience at picking up rare autographed books that could not be acquired by purchase1 and at outwitting the antique-dealer at his own game4 ,we sympathize with the antique-hunter when the wicked dealer attempts to charge him seventeen dollars for a ,benjamin ,franklin cup-plate needed to round out his collection1 and we rejoice when the hunter slips out in full view of the dealer1 leaving his monocle on the counter and using the cup-plate as his monocle4 ,there are equally stirring stories of ,sheraton high-boys1 an old ,colonial cradle1 a #cf-year-old bottle of ,glenlivet whiskey1 and an original box of ,haskell golf balls with seal unbroken4 ,some ,press ,opinions 8,stories of an unusual antique-sense1 showing much close observation and practical knowledge1 as well as a bright and pleasant fancy40 ,plumbers' ,guide4 8,the author artfully combines instruction with advanced and forward-looking ideals40 ,the ,nation4 8,a refreshing book1 after the wishy-washy1 goody-goody trash with which preceding generations have been led astray40 ,the ,dial4 8,i am pleased with this book4 ,i have read it entirely through once1 and ,i am thinking of reading it again4 ,i think it would stand four or five readings4 ,it is written in the style that ,i approve4 ,i shall mention it to all my friends1 and ,i hope that all my friends will mention it40 ,hendrik ,van ,lunkhead in the ,biltmore ,bun4 ,,talks ,,about ,,table-,,legs ,,by ,,frank ,,flush1 ,b4,s41 ,f4,a4,s4 ,containing #cf illustrations of legs1 #af of which are full-page in color4 ,small square demy #hvo41 cloth1 gilt top ,,price #f_/- ,some ,press ,opinions 8,it is written in a most interesting style2 and under ,mr4 ,flush's deft touch1 the table-legs seem endowed with almost feminine qualities40 ,d4 ,h4 ,lawrence in the ,n4,y4 ,times4 8,a fascinating introduction to the study of wooden legs40 ,cabinetmakers' ,review4 8,mr4 ,flush has done for table-legs what some of the younger school of ,american writers1 notably ,f4 ,scott ,fitzgerald1 has done for flappers--made them seem almost human40 ,tacoma ,trade ,gazette4 ,,autographs ,,and ,,antimacassars ,,by ,c4 ,,von ,,whistelberry ,containing #ee illustrations1 #ca of which are colored reproductions of unusual autographs4 ,crown #dto41 canvas boards1 with ,picture in ,color on the ,cover ,,price #a_/f ,some ,press ,opinions 8,this would make a charming and welcome gift for children who are just old enough to learn about and be interested in forging and other autograph features40 ,sunday ,school ,times4 8,in simple and yet glowing words the author introduces us to #8,autographs and ,antimacassars1' and the glamour of the pictures is sustained as we read about them40 ,peanut ,growers' ,monthly4 8,a mine of information for the antimacassar enthusiast40 ,rome 7,italy7 ,avanti4 ,,peeps ,,at ,,precious ,,discards ,,edited ,,by ,,the ,,rev4 ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,each containing #af full-page illustrations1 #h of which are in color4 ,large crown1 #hvo41 cloth1 with ,pictures in color on the cover ,post free1 #a_/i ,,price #a_/f ,,net ,,per ,,volume ,post free1 #a_/i ,list of ,volumes ,,pocket ,,flasks ,,of ,,the ,,long ,,ago ,,by ,,the ,,rev4 ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,,pulse-,,warmers ,,of ,,many ,,lands ,,by ,w4 ,,percival ,,wishback1 ,f4,s4,s4 ,,where ,,to ,,hunt ,,for ,,door-,,knockers ,,by ,a4 ,,nicol ,,dundreary1 ,f4,r4,d4,k4,s4 ,,chignons ,,and ,,hair-,,nets ,,of ,,old ,,new ,,england ,,by ,,daniel ,,fillwiddle1 ,m4,a4 #ajjj ,,uses ,,for ,,fire-,,buckets ,,by ,a4 ,m4 ,,slipover ,,romance ,,of ,a ,,pewter-,,hound ,,by ,,the ,,rev4 ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,,the ,,back-,,yard ,,antique-,,collector ,,by ,,richard ,,scrimm1 ,f4,r4,i4,p41 ,superintendent of the ,lemon ,river ,park and ,playground ,associates ,,the ,,art ,,of ,,sign-,,painting ,,and ,,sign ,,collecting ,,by ,a4 ,,nicol ,,dundreary1 ,f4,r4,d4,k4,s4 ,,pill ,,advertisements ,,by ,,the ,,rev4 ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,,common ,,british ,,commodes ,,by ,a4 ,m4 ,,slipover ,,uncommon ,,british ,,bath-,,tubs ,,by ,,the ,,rev4 ,,charles ,a4 ,,doolittle1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,,how ,,to ,,get ,,presentation ,,copies ,,for ,,nothing ,,by ,,the ,,rev4 ,,james ,,hookleberry1 ,f4,r4,a4,c4,s4 ,,sign ,,stealers' ,,manual ,,for ,,the ,,college ,,man ,,by ,,constance ,,may ,,turnspit ,containing #cb full-page illustrations from ,photographs1 a frontispiece in color of a fascinating beer-advertisement1 and a list of professional bail-furnishers in the leading ,american and ,continental cities4 ,small square demy #hvo41 cloth1 gilt top ,by ,post1 #e_/d ,,price #e_/- ,,net ,by ,post1 #e_/d ,some ,press ,opinions 8,this handsome book1 with its innumerable illustrations1 will be of the greatest interest to the progressive college man with an eye for interior decoration4 ,we congratulate the authoress on the pleasing and learned way in which she discourses on the technicalities of removing signs from their fastenings4 ,she has evidently studied minutely the methods of our leading second-story workers40 ,sing-,sing ,occupant4 8,a very taking book40 ,manchester ,guardian4 8,a valuable and handsome souvenir for those bound ,up the ,river40 ,new ,york ,call4 ,,the ,,whatnot ,,and ,,how ,,to ,,decorate ,,it ,,by ,,agnes ,,aconite ,containing #h full-page illustrations by ,patten ,hairback4 ,small square demy #hvo41 cloth1 gilt top ,by ,post1 #e_/d ,,price #e_/- ,,net ,by ,post1 #e_/d ,some ,press ,opinions 8,one of the most fascinating of interior decorations1 the potentialities of the ,whatnot are so little known to the majority of people that this story of its possibilities is of the greatest interest40 ,congressional ,record4 8,in ,miss ,aconite's book the ,whatnot is drawn so vividly that the reader seems to see it covered with actual seashells1 cut glass and cabinet photographs1 and follows its career with interest right to its tragic close1 when it is broken up to provide fuel during a coal strike40 ,herrin 7,ill47 ,garroter4 8,miss ,aconite knows the ,whatnot as it is in its haunts1 and she presents it with such remarkable clearness and insight that you long to throw a rock at it40 ,moscow ,izvestia4 ------------------------------------ ,end of ,book ------------------------------------ ,transcriber's ,note 7continued7 ,errors in punctuation and simple typos have been corrected without note4 ,variations in spelling1 hyphenation1 accents1 etc41 have been left as they appear in the original publication unless as stated in the following3 ,page #f - 8solecism ending0 changed to 8solecism of ending0 7solecism of ending a sentence prepositionally7 ,page #ef - 8,bastile0 changed to 8,bastille0 7fall of the ,bastille7 ,page #ij - 8painting0 changed to 8paintings0 7paintings of anmic bunches of flowers7 ,page #add - 8,brentme0 changed to 8,brantme0 7,brantme1 ,rabelais1 and ,casanova7 -------- ,footnotes are placed immediately below the paragraph in which the reference to that footnote appears4