,puritan ,discipline ,tracts4           
,,an ,,almond ,,for ,a ,,parrot2        
,,being                                 
,a ,,reply                              
,,to                                    
,,martin ,,mar-,,prelate4               
,re-printed from the ,black ,letter     
,edition1                               
,,with                         ,,an     
,,introduction ,,and ,,notes4           
,,london3                      ,,john   
,,petheram1 #ga1 ,,chancery ,,lane4     
#ahdf4          ,,introduction4         
,although ,i cannot at this time bring  
together positive and undoubted         
evidence of the authorship of the       
following tract1 7because the materials 
are at present inaccessible to me17 at  
some future period1 in the              
,introduction to one of his accredited  
productions1 ,i hope to place the  fact 
beyond the reach of cavil or question1  
that ,thomas ,nash1 to whom  public fame
 has given it1 was the author4    ,nash 
was of ,st4 ,john's ,college1           

,cambridge1 and took his degree of      
,b4,a4  in #aehe4 ,he is supposed to    
have quitted the university in some     
disgrace  about #aehf1 but of the cause 
we are entirely ignorant4 ,the anonymous
  author of a tract called              
8,polymanteia10 printed in #aeie1 thus  
alludes to  it3 8,cambridge1 make thy   
two children friends2 thou hast been    
unkind to  one ,nash1 to wean him before
 his time1 and too fond upon the other  
,gabriel ,harvey1 to keep him so long   
without preferment2 the one is  ancient 
and of small reading2 the other is young
 and full of wit40 ,nash  himself speaks
 of his beardless years1 in ,pierce     
,penniless2 and ,gabriel  ,harvey1 in   
his ,pierce's ,supererogation1 #aeib1   
calls him 8a gosling of  the printing   
house20 and in another place 8a proper  
young man20 and  elsewhere1 8a young man
 of the greenest spring1 as beardless in
 judgment  as in face30 so that he must 
have taken his degree of ,b4,a4 early in
 life1  and we know that he never       

proceeded ,master of ,arts4    ,it would
 appear from the ,introduction to the   
following tract that ,nash  had visited 
,italy4 ,mr4 ,collier1 in his           
,introduction to ,nash's ,pierce        
,penniless ,shakspeare ,soc4 #ahdb1     
says1 8,we find him ,nash in ,london  in
 #aehg1 in which year he wrote a very   
amusing and clever introductory  epistle
 to a tract by the celebrated ,robert   
,greene1 called #8,menaphon1'           
afterwards better known by the name of  
#8,greene's ,arcadia1' the title it     
bore in the later impressions4 ,this    
seems to have been ,nash's earliest     
appearance in the character of an       
author0 p4 x4 xi41 then adding in a     
note1 8,we take the date of #8,greene's 
,menaphon1' #aehg1 from the edition  of 
that author's #8,dramatic ,works1' by   
the ,rev4 ,a4 ,dyce40 ,mr4 ,collier     
apparently had forgotten that he had    
himself stated some years before  the   
fact of the ,arcadia having been printed
 in #aehg1 8because in ,greene's        

,euphues1 his ,censure to ,philautus1 of
 the same date1 it is mentioned  as     
already in print40 ,hist4 ,english      
,dramatic ,poetry1 vol4 iii4 p4 #aej4   
,whatever may be the date of the first  
edition of ,greene's ,menaphon1 we  have
 here only to do with ,nash's ,preface  
to that work1 and1 though ,sir  ,e4     
,brydges1 in his reprint of it in #ahad1
 mentions #aehg1 in which he is         
followed by the ,rev4 ,a4 ,dyce in      
#ahca1 ,greene's ,works1 ,,ii4 c4 iii1  
by  ,mr4 ,collier above1 in the same    
year1 and again in #ahdb1 all agreeing  
to  fix the date of ,nash's ,preface in 
#aehg2 yet there is1 if ,i mistake not1 
internal evidence that it could not have
 been written before the date of  the   
first known edition1 which is in #aehi4 
,of the accuracy of the extraordinary   
facts which ,nash relates in the        
,introduction to the ,almond for a      
,parrot pp4 #e1 #f1 ,i had expected to  
find confirmation in some book of       
travels of the time1 but in this have   

not succeeded4    ,nash1 in his ,preface
 to ,menaphon1 addressed 8,to the       
,gentlemen ,students  of both           
,universities10 evidently referring to  
the ,puritans1 mentions1  8the most     
poisonous ,pasquils any dirty-mouthed   
,martin or ,momus ever  composed20 of   
their 8spitting ergo in the mouth of    
every one they  meet20 and1 unless ,i am
 mistaken1 the following refers to      
,penry3 8,but  when the irregular idiot1
 that was up to the ears in divinity    
before ever  he met with probabile in   
the university1 shall leave pro et      
contra  before he can scarcely pronounce
 it1 and come to correct commonweals    
that never heard of the name of         
magistrate before he came to ,cambridge1
  it is no marvel if every alehouse     
vaunt the table of the world turned     
upside down1 since the child beateth his
 father1 and the ass whippeth his       
master40 ,reprint of ,menaphon1 in      
,archaica1 ,pref4 xiii41 #dto1 #ahad4   
,the  allusions in the whole sentence   

can only be explained by referring them 
to ,martin ,mar-,prelate's 8,epistle10  
8,epitome10 c41 which were printed in   
#aehh4    ,secondly1 ,nash says1 8,it   
may be my ,anatomy of ,absurdities may  
acquaint  you ere long with my skill in 
surgery40 ,now1 the ,anatomy of         
,absurdities  came out in #aehi1 and the
 expression 8ere long0 would scarcely   
apply had  this been written in #aehg4  
,thirdly1 he says1 8,if ,i please1 ,i   
will think my ignorance indebted unto   
you that applaud it1 if not1 what rests 
but that ,i be excluded from your       
courtesy1 like ,apocrypha from your     
,bibles80    ,this passage appears to   
refer to a fact which ,martin           
,mar-,prelate states  in his ,epistle to
 the ,terrible ,priests4 ,reprint1 p4   
#d4 8,the last  lent he is writing in   
#aehh there came a commaundement from   
his grace  into ,paules ,church ,yard1  
that no ,byble should be bounde without 
the  ,apocripha40 ,strype1 in his ,life 
of ,archbishop ,whitgift1 admits the    

order1  and takes some pains to justify 
the ,archbishop in issuing it4 ,see     
,strype's ,whitgift1 i4                 
#eij4--;,cooper's ,admonition1 #aehi4   
,the foregoing inferences1 however1 are 
confirmed by the fact that there  is an 
allusion in this ,preface to a work     
which did not appear until #aehi4       
,nash1 in giving the roll of ,english   
,worthies1 introduces the following     
passage3 8,i will not say but we had a  
,,haddon1 whose pen would have          
challenged the laurel from ,homer2      
together with ,,car1 that came as near  
him as ,virgil to ,theocritus4 ,but     
,,thomas ,,newton1 with his ,leiland1   
and  ,,gabriel ,,harvey1 with two or    
three other1 is almost all the store    
that is  left us at this hour40 ,pref4  
to ,menaphon1 xviii4    ,as ,newton's   
,leiland is a work of unfrequent        
occurrence1 ,i subjoin the  title at    
length3 8,principum1 ac illustrium      
aliquot  eruditorum in ,anglia  virorum1
 ,encomia1 ,tropha1 ,genethliaca        

,epithalamia4 ,a ,joanne ,lelando       
,antiquario conscripta1 nunc primm in   
lucem edita4 ,quibus etiarn adiuncta    
sunt1 ,illustrissimorum aliquot ,herum1 
hodi viventium1 aliormq2  hinc ind      
,anglorum1 ,,encomia et ,,evlogia3      
,thoma ,newtono ,cestreshyrio1          
succisiuis horulis exarata4 ,londini1   
apud ,thomam ,orwinum1 ,typographum4    
#aehi10 in #dto4 ,this work may also    
contain internal evidence1 in addition  
to the statement in the title-page1 that
 it was first published in #aehi4       
,there is a poem at p4 #abb1 8,ad ,chr4 
,oclandum de ,elizabetheide sua10 which 
may refer to the first part of ,ocland's
 ,elizabetheis1 which came out in       
#aehb1 but most probably refers to the  
second part1 printed by ,thomas  ,orwin1
 in #aehi4    ,i should not have taken  
the trouble to investigate the contents 
of this  ,preface of ,nash1 8the        
firstlings of my folly10 as he calls it 
himself  p4 xxi1 with such minuteness1  
but that it establishes beyond question 

the fact that ,nash commenced his       
literary career in #aehi1 and not1 as is
  generally supposed1 in #aehg4    ,in  
the following ,introduction1 ,nash says1
 8,for comming from ,venice the  last   
summer1 and taking ,bergamo in my waye  
homeward to ,england40 ,now as  he      
afterwards alludes to the appearance of 
,martin ,mar-prelate in ,england1  and  
also to the defeat of the ,spanish      
,armada1 8neither ,philip by his        
power10 this most probably was the      
latter part of the summer of #aehh1 and 
if he arrived in ,england towards the   
end of #aehh1 there would be both  time 
and opportunity for him to write the    
various works1 which1 published  in     
#aehi1 are attributed to him4 ,there is 
every probability1 therefore1  that     
,nash did visit ,italy1 that he was     
there in #aehh1 and that1 returning  to 
,england with his mind enlarged by      
travel1 he commenced his short1  but    
remarkable career in literature1 which1 
after he had undergone the  painful     

vicissitudes to which authors by        
profession have so often been           
subjected1        8,since none takes    
pitie of a scholler's neede10    was    
terminated by his death in #afja4    ,i 
shall not here enumerate the various    
works which ,nash wrote1 because an     
opportunity will offer1 in the          
,introduction to one of his             
publications1  to notice the whole of   
them4    ,whatever was the origin of the
 long and bitter quarrel between ,nash  
and  ,gabriel ,harvey1 from this passage
 in the ,preface to ,menaphon1 #aehi1   
8and ,gabriel ,harvey1 with two or three
 other1 is almost all the store  that is
 left us at this hour10 we may          
reasonably infer that it was not  in    
existence then4 ,the origin1 progress1  
and effect of this quarrel1  which      
included ,lyly1 ,greene1 ,nash1 and the 
three ,harveys1 and the right           
understanding of which is necessary to  
elucidate the progress of the  ,martin  
,mar-,prelate ,controversy1 ,i hope to  

give in the ,introduction  to 8,plaine  
,percevall the ,peace-,maker of         
,england10 a tract uniformly  attributed
 to ,nash2 but which he1 in one of his  
publications1 not only  utterly         
disclaims1 but charges it upon one of   
his most hated antagonists4    ,the     
internal evidence in favour of ,nash1 as
 the author of the ,almond  for a       
,parrot1 is very strong2 and cannot but 
appear to any one who is  conversant    
with his 8,christ's ,tears over         
,jerusalem10 a work containing  more    
remarkable passages than any publication
 of the time that has ever  fallen in my
 way4 ,the description of ,penry1 at p4 
#ci1 beginning1 8,where1  what his      
estimation was10 c42 but more especially
 the paragraph at p4  #ba1 beginning1   
8,talke as long as you will of the      
,ioyes of heaven10 c41  may be compared 
with several passages in 8,christ's     
,tears0 wherein ,nash  describes the    
horrors endured by its inhabitants      
during the siege of  ,jerusalem4        

,with respect to the title 8,an ,almond 
for a ,parrat10 the meaning appears     
obvious2 it is evidently a cant term1   
and like 8,a ,sop to ,cerberus10 means  
a stopper for the mouth4 ,mr4           
,halliwell1 in his ,dictionary of       
,archaic and  ,provincial ,words1 calls 
it 8a kind of proverbial expression10   
but does  not attempt to trace its      
origin4 ,it is used by ,skelton ,works  
by ,dyce1  ii4 #d1 by ,webster ,works1  
iii4 #abb1 and by ,middleton ,works1    
iii4 #aab4    ,the original1 from which 
the present tract is reprinted1 is a    
small  #dto1 printed in black letter1   
consisting altogether of #bh pages4 ,the
  8,protestation0 is referred to at p4  
#aa1 8,pap with a ,hatchet10 at p4 #ab1 
and 8,hay any worke for a ,cooper10 at  
p4 #ae1 by which it is certain that  its
 publication was subsequent to them1 and
 may perhaps be referred to  the latter 
end of the year #aehi4                  
,j4 ,p4    ,,london1 ,nov4 #bhth1 #ahde4
                                   ,an  

,almond for a ,parrat1                  
,or                            ,cutbert 
,curry-knaues                           
,almes4                        ,fit for 
the knaue ,martin1 and the              
rest of those impudent ,beggers1 that   
can not be content to stay their        
stomakes                    with a      
,benefice1 but they will needes         
breake their fastes with                
our ,bishops4                           
,rimarum sum plenus4                    
,therefore beware 7gentle ,reader7 you  
catch not the hicket with laughing4     
,imprinted at a ,place1 not farre from a
              ,place1 by the ,assignes  
of ,signior ,some-body1 and             
are to be sold at his shoppe in         
,trouble-knaue                          
,street1 at the signe of the            
,standish4          ,,to ,,that ,,most  
,comicall and conceited ,caualeire      
,monsieur du ,kempe1 ,iestmonger and    
,vice-gerent generall to the ,ghost of  
,dicke ,tarlton4    ,his louing brother 

,cutbert ,curry-knaue sendeth ,greeting4
      ,brother ,kempe1 as many alhailes 
to thy person as there be haicocks  in  
,iuly at ,pancredge3 ,so it is1 that    
what for old acquaintance1 and  some    
other respectes of my pleasure1 ,i haue 
thought good to offer here  certaine    
spare stuffe to your protection1 which  
if your sublimitie  accept in good part1
 or vouchsafe to shadow with the        
curtaine of your  countenance1 ,i am    
yours till fatall destiny two yeares    
after doomes day4  ,many write bookes to
 knights and men of great place1 and    
haue thankes1  with promise of a further
 reward for their paines3 others come of
 with a  long ,epistle to some rufling  
,courtier1 that sweares swoundes and    
bloud  as soone as euer their backe is  
turnd1 a man can not goe in the streetes
  for these impudent beggers4 ,to auoide
 therefore as well the worthlesse       
attendance on the one1 as the vsuall    
scorne of the other1 ,i haue made       
choise of thy amorous selfe to be the   

pleasant patron of my papers4  ,if thou 
wilt not accept of it in regard of the  
enuy of some ,citizens1  that can not   
away with argument1 ,ile preferre it to 
the soule of ,dick  ,tarlton1 who ,i    
know will entertaine it with thankes1   
imitating herein  that merry man        
,rablays1 who dedicated most of his     
workes to the soule  of the old ,queene 
of ,nauarre many yeares after her death1
 for that she  was a maintainer of mirth
 in her life4 ,marry ,god send vs more  
of her  making1 and then some of vs     
should not liue so discontted as we do3 
for  now a dayes1 a man can not haue a  
bout with a ,balletter1 or write ,midas 
habet aures asininas in great ,romaine  
letters1 but hee shall bee in  daunger  
of a further displeasure4 ,well1 come on
 it what will1 ,martin and  ,i will     
allow of no such doinges1 wee can cracke
 halfe a score blades in  a backe-lane  
though a ,constable come not to part vs4
 ,neither must you  thinke his worship  
is to pure to be such a swasher1 for as 

,scipio was  called ,africanus1 not for 
relieuing and restoring1 but for        
subuerting and  destroying of ,africa3  
so he and his companions are called     
,puritans1 not  for aduancing or        
supporting of puritie1 by their         
vnspotted integritie1  but of their     
vndermining and supplanting it by their 
manifold heresies4  ,and in deed therein
 he doth but apply himselfe to that hope
 which his  holinesse the ,pope and     
other confederate forriners1 haue       
conceiued of  his towardnesse4 ,for     
comming from ,venice the last ,summer1  
and taking  ,bergamo in my waye homeward
 to ,england1 it was my happe soiourning
  there some foure or fiue dayes1 to    
light in felowship with that famous     
,francattip' ,harlicken1 who perceiuing 
me to bee an ,english man by my  habit  
and speech1 asked me many particulars1  
of the order and maner of  our playes1  
which he termed by the name of          
representations3 amongst other  talke he
 enquired of me if ,i knew any such     

,parabolano here in ,london1  as        
,signior ,chiarlatano ,kempino4 ,very   
well 7quoth ,i17 and haue beene oft  in 
his company4 ,he hearing me say so1     
began to embrace me a new1 and  offered 
me all the courtesie he colde for his   
sake1 saying1 although he  knew him not1
 yet for the report he had hard of his  
pleasance1 hee colde  not but bee in    
loue with his perfections being absent4 
,as we were thus  discoursing1 ,i hard  
such ringing of belles1 such singing1   
such shouting1  as though ,rhodes had   
beene recouered1 or the ,turke quite    
driuen out of  ,christendome1           
therewithal ,i might behold an hundreth 
bonefiers together1  tables spred in the
 open streetes1 and banquets brought in 
of all handes4  ,demaunding the reason  
of him that was next me1 he told the    
newes was  there 7thankes be to ,god17  
that there was a famous ,schismatike one
 ,martin  newe sprung vp in ,england1   
who by his bookes1 libels1 and writings1
  had brought that to passe1 which      

neither the ,pope by his ,seminaries1   
,philip by his power1 nor all the holy  
,league by their vnderhand  practises   
and policies could at any time effect3  
for wheras they liued  at vnitie before1
 and might by no meanes be drawne vnto  
discord1 hee  hath inuented such        
quiddities to set them together by the  
eares1 that  now the temporaltie is     
readie to plucke out the throtes of the 
,cleargie1  and subiects to withdraw    
their allegeance from their ,souerayne3 
so  that in short time1 it is hoped they
 will bee vp in armes one against       
another1 whiles we aduantaged by this   
domesticall enuy1 may inuade them       
vnawares1 when they shall not be able to
 resist4 ,i1 sory to heare of  these    
triumphes1 coulde not rest till ,i had  
related these tidinges to my            
countrimen4 ,if thou hast them at the   
second hand1 7fellow ,kempe7 impute  it 
to the intercepting of my papers1 that  
haue stayed for a good winde1  euer     
since the beginning of winter4 ,now they

 are arriued1 make much of  them1 and   
with the credit of thy clownery1 protect
 thy ,cutbert from  ,carpers4           
,thine in the way of brotherhood1       
,cutbert ,curry-knaue4          ,an     
,almond for a ,parrat4      ,welcome    
,mayster ,martin from the dead1 and much
 good ioy may you haue of  your         
stage-like resurrection4 ,it was told me
 by the vndanted purseuants  of your    
sonnes1 and credibly beleeued in regard 
of your sinnes1 that your  grout-headed 
holinesse had turnd vppe your heeles    
like a tired iade in a  medow1 and      
snorted out your scornefull soule1 like 
a mesled hogge on a  mucke-hill1 which  
had it not beene false as the deuill    
woulde haue it1  that long tongd        
doctresse ,dame ,law4 muste haue beene  
faint 7in spite  of insperation7 to haue
 giuen ouer speaking in the             
congregation1 and  employ her ,parrats  
tong in stead of a winde-clapper to     
scarre the crowes  from thy carrion4    
,but profound ,cliffe the               

ecclesiasticall cobler1  interrupted    
from his morning exercise with this     
false alarum1 broke vp  his brotherly   
loue-meeting abruptly1 when the spirite 
had but newly moued  him1 and betooke   
him to his solitary shoppe1 abutting on 
the backe side  of a bulke4 ,nor was his
 souterly sorrow so hippocritically     
ingratefull1  but he determined in the  
aboundance of his teares1 that made a   
ful tide  in his blacking tubbe1 to haue
 stitcht vp your traytourshippe a tumbe 
of vntand leather1 wherein tanquam      
culeolo insutus1 hee mought haue  sought
 his fortune in the seas4 ,but ,i know  
not how this parracides  exequies were  
prorogd1 in so much as a brother in     
,christ of his at  ,northampton1 fetcht 
a more thriftier president of funeralls 
piping hot  from the primitiue church1  
which including but a few words and     
those  passing well expounded1 kept his 
wainscot from waste1 and his linnen     
from wearing1 sufficeth he tombled his  
wife naked into the earth at high       

noone1 without sheete or shroude to     
couer her shame1 breathing ouer her  in 
an audible voice3 ,naked came ,i out of 
my mothers wombe1 and naked  shall ,i   
returne againe4 ,tut1 tut1 a thousand of
 these pranks make no  discord in my    
young maisters discipline1 whose        
reformed fraternity1 quoat  ,scripture  
so confidently1 as if they had lately   
purchast a commission  of cum priuilegio
 ad interpretandum solum1 from ,christ  
and his twelue  ,apostls4 ,and in deede 
who knowes whether ,maister ,martin     
being inspired1  as earst one of his    
faction1 who hearing the waites play    
vnder his  window very early1 insulted  
most impudently1 that in the midst of   
his  morning praiers1 he was presented  
with the melody of ,angels1 so hee in   
like manner shoulde vaunt of some       
reuelation1 wherein the full sinode  of 
,lucifers ministers angells assembled1  
did parlament all their enuy  to the    
subuersion of our established ministry1 
and then comes forth  some more subtile 

spirite of hipocrisie1 which offers     
himself to be  a false prophet in the   
mouths of our ,martinists1 to whom the  
whole  sedition house of hel            
condiscending1 break vp their sessions1 
and send  this seducer into the world1  
where finding no such mutinous seate1 as
  the heart of our seconde ,pilate      
,marprelate1 he chose it in steade of  a
 worser1 to bee vnto ,england as        
,zidkiah son of ,chenaanah was vnto     
,ahab4 ,beare with me good ,maister     
,pistle-monger1 if in comparing thy     
knauery1 my full points seeme as tedious
 to thy puritane perusers1 as  the      
,northren mans mile1 and a waybitte to  
the weary passenger1 for ,i  tell thee  
troth1 till ,i see what market          
commission thou hast to assiste  any    
mans sentences1 ,i will neuer subscribe 
to thy periode prescisme4 ,and  hearest 
thou old ,martin1 did all thy libells   
iointly shroude so much  substance of   
diuinity in their outlandish letters1 as
 that one periode of  vniformity in ,t4 

,c4 directing to obedience1 ,i would    
thinke ,god had bin  mercifull to thee  
in inspiring thy soule with some one    
separate motion1  from reprobation1 but 
when whole reames of paper are blotted  
with thy  huperbolical blasphemies and  
religious matters of controversy more   
then  massacred by thy prophane         
scurrility1 ,i c but suppose thy hart y 
house  swept and garnished1 into the    
which the foule spirit returned with    
other  #g4 spirits worse then himself4  
,malicious hipocryt1 didst thou so much 
malign the successeful thriuings of the 
,gospell1 that thou shouldst filch  thy 
selfe1 as a new disease into our        
gouernement8 wert thou the last         
instrument of ,sathans enuy1 that as the
 abhortiue childe of a ,chaos  of       
heresies1 thou sholdst adorne thy false 
dealing with the induments  of          
discipline8 ,me thinks ,i see thee smile
 from vnder thy double-fact  hood1 to   
thinke howe craftily thou hast crept    
into mens csciences3 but  wouldst thou  

obserue1 how if thy alarums haue        
prosperd in our peaceable  ears1 that   
make no more breach into our state1 then
 the iron hornes of  those hony tgd     
prophets into the arraies of the        
,aramites1 ,chro4 #b4  and tenth ,chap4 
thou wouldest with ,achitophell return  
to thy house 7at  least if thou hast    
any7 and hang thy selfe in a            
melancholie1 for that thy  counsaile was
 turned to follye4 ,when ,i first saw   
thy books1 ,i ascribed  thy impudence to
 the ,calabrian wonders of #hh4 but when
 #hi4 beheld thee  in a new sute1 ,i    
imagined the excesse of our sins1 sent  
thee forth to  geue railing sentence    
against vs1 as ,simei against ,dauid in 
the #b4  of ,kings4 ,yet seely sophister
 wouldest thou return the sobrietie of  
thy  morning wittes to this ouerworne   
,simile1 that the rodde which was made  
to correct post destinatum finem1 is    
cast into the fire1 thy despaire  would 
deeme euery darke hole1 the entraunce   
into hell1 thy soule being  the cittie1 

whereof the deuill is made free by      
endenture4 ,and be it  true which       
pittying report hath auouched1          
,herostratus desire to be  famous1 made 
thee to seale him a conueiance of it    
many yeares since1  so that now thy     
notorious pamphlets hauing passed the   
,presse1 it is to  be feared he will    
come ouer thee for couenantes ere many  
yeares to an  end4 ,it may bee thou hast
 redde ,foxes ,monuments more idlely1   
where  lighting on the example of       
,luther1 that by his praiers            
importunitie1  made the deuil to deliuer
 vp the obligation of his dnation1 that 
sold  the ioies of ,heau1 for the       
inheritance of earth1 thou hopest in    
like  manner in the age of thine        
iniquities to bee restored to eternity1 
by  the vncessant inuocation of the     
,church which thou termest              
,antichristian4  ,deceiue not thy selfe 
thou man of security1 for the enemy of  
,adam is  no poeticall ,argus1 that his 
eies should be put out by thy arguments4

  ,i tell thee troth1 he wil be-pistle  
thee so peuishly1 with allegations  of  
vnuenidall sinnes1 as though hee were   
borne within two houses of  ,battle     
bridge4 ,it is not thy despairing       
protestations1 can make thy  peace with 
,god1 whose church thou hast sought to  
deuide1 as did ,herods  souldiers his   
garmentes3 wele geue thee leaue to tell 
vs a smooth tale of  the intercepting of
 thy treasons1 and curry fauour like a  
crafty foxe1  with the ciuill magistrate
 in politique termes of feare and       
reuerence1  but thy heart is no more    
disguised in this hypocriticall apparel1
 then  a trenchour ,aristippus in the   
coate of a ,parasite4 ,why discourse ,i 
so soberly1 with the mortal enemy of    
modesty1 when as the filth of the       
stewes1 distild into ribauldry termes1  
cannot confectionate a more  intemperate
 stile then his ,pamphlets4 ,thou calst 
our ,bishops wicked  by comparison1     
whereas 7wert thou strooken as thou     
protests with the  vntoward euents of   

thy villanies7 thou shouldst find the   
defilings of the  #g4 deadly sins1 to   
haue broght thee by a pleasant          
pollution1 within the  possitiue degree 
of damnation4 ,what talk ,i to him1 of  
hel or damnation1  whom ,lucifer hath   
furnisht to infection1 with the painted 
poison of  snout-holy deuotion1 and all 
the powers of darknesse1 haue adorned as
 an  intelligencer to their kingdome1 of
 the infirmities in our flourishing     
,church of ,england4 ,to this purpose   
haue they inspired him with a most      
scurrile spirite of lying1 that when his
 eagle-sighted enuy can truely  atract  
no argument of infamy1 his poetica      
licentia1 may haue a fresh  supply of   
possibilities1 that encrease by         
ctinuance to a compleat libell  of      
leasings4 ,all you that be schollers1   
read but his last challenge1  wherein he
 laies about him so lamely1 as though of
 his limping brother  ,pag4 hee had     
lately learned to play at cudgels4 ,but 
how euer his  crazed cause goes on      

crutches1 that was earst so brauely     
encountered  by ,pasquin and            
,marphoreus1 and not many moneths since 
most wittily  scofte at by the          
extemporall endeuour of the pleasant    
author of ,pap with  a hatchet3 yet is  
not the good olde creeple vtterly       
discouraged1 or  driuen cleane from his 
dounghill1 but he meanes to make the    
persecuted  ,coblers once more merrie4  
,yet by your leaue his other dayes      
daunger is  not so fully disgested1 that
 he shuld forget the sanctified martyrs 
his brethren1 those runagate ,printers1 
to whose reuenge he bequeatheth  a large
 ,pistle of rayling ,epithites1 and     
mistearmeth our ,bishoppes  authoritie1 
with a whole ,textor of tyrannie4 ,a few
 of whose milder  tearms are of this    
making1 wicked ,priests1 presumptuous   
,priests1 proude  ,prelates1 arrogant   
,bishops1 horseleeches1 butchers1       
persecutors of the  truth1 ,lamhethical 
whelps1 ,spanish ,inquisitours4 ,thinke 
you this myrie  mouthed mate1 a partaker

 of heauenly inspiration1 that thus     
aboundes in  his vncharitable railings3 
yet are these nothing in comparison of  
his  auncient burlibond adiunctes1 that 
so pester his former edition with  their
 vnweldie phrase1 as no true syllogisme 
can haue elbowe roome where  they are4  
,in which ,alphabet these that followe  
may bee placed3 bounsing  ,priests1     
terrible ,priests1 venerable ,maisters1 
proud and pontificall  ,patripolitians4 
,gentle reader1 ,i giue you but a tast  
of them by the waie1  that you may knowe
 them the next time you meete them in   
your dish1 and  learne to discerne a    
poysonous scorpion from wholesome fish4 
,martin  you must thinke1 was moude1    
when his gun-pouder papers were fired   
aboute  his eares1 and the spendthriftes
 his ,printers1 haled to the prison     
their  patrimonies4 ,wherefore ,i cannot
 blame him though he sends abroade his  
,letters of supplication1 in behalfe of 
his seruants that did but his  bidding4 
,the ,church1 the ,church is persecuted 

amongst you my maisters1  and ,martin   
gettes nere a superintendentship by the 
shift1 but let not  ,meg ,law4 crie once
 more to the ,churchwardens for her     
foode1 least shee  bring with her a     
campe royall of scoldes1 to scratch out 
your eyes4 ,oh  she will declaime       
brauely ouer a ,cuckstoole1 and plaie   
the gyant in a  narrowe lane with her   
distaffe4 ,maister ,cooper shall haue   
his stipend  still at ,paules chaine1 or
 else shee will sweat for it4 ,i lyke   
such a  wench that will stande to her   
tackling1 why ,bishoppes are but men1   
and  she will carrie a ,martin in her   
plackarde in despite of the proudest of 
them all4 ,learne of her you ,london    
,matrones1 to make hodie-peeles of your 
husbandes1 and leade them like good     
soules up and downe the streetes by  the
 hornes1 let it be seene by your        
courages in scolding1 that women haue   
soules1 which a balde eloquent brother  
of yours1 denide not long since  in his 
,sermon at ,lichfielde4 ,i1 ,i1 my      

maisters1 you may mocke1 on as  you see 
cause1 but ,i warrant you the good olde 
true-pennie ,marprelate  is not so      
merrie1 hee sits ruminating under an    
oake1 or in the bottome  of a haystacke1
 whose bloud shall be first spilte in   
the reformation of  the ,church4 ,and   
not without cause1 for hee that hath so 
lately felte  the paine of worming and  
launcing1 cannot but stande in awe of   
,buls  slicing tooles one two moneths   
after4 ,o it is a hairebrande           
whooresonne1  and well seene in         
,phlebotomie1 if a but once take knife  
in hande1 cha  will as soone let out the
 seditious humours forth a ,martinistes 
bodie1  as the best he in ,england1 that
 hath bin twentie yeeres practioners  in
 ,surgerie4 ,good munckie face          
,machiuell1 shew but thy head once1 and 
trie him at my request1 and if he doe it
 not more handsomely1 then  those whom  
thou callest ,butchers and              
,horseleeches1 then neuer trust an  olde
 ladde whilest thou liuest4 ,how euer it

 happens1 thou bearest thy  resolution  
in thy mouth at highe midnight1 and hast
 ,scripture enough  to carrie thee to   
heauen1 though thou wert hangde to      
morrowe4 ,we feare  not men that can    
kill the bodie1 quoth ,martin1 because  
we feare ,god1  who can cast both bodie 
and soule into vnquenchable fire4 ,doest
 thou  feare ,god in deede1 ,i praie    
thee good hedge-creeper how shall we    
knowe  that8 ,what1 by the smoothing of 
thy face1 the simpering of thy mouth1   
or staring of thy eies8 ,why if that be 
to feare ,god1 ,ile haue a spare        
fellowe shall make mee a whole quest of 
faces for three farthinges4 ,but  thou  
wilt peraduenture saie1 by thy obedience
 vnto him4 ,then will ,i  catechise thee
 more kindly with a fewe more ,christian
 questions3 the  first whereof shall be 
this1 wherein thou placest obedience1   
which if  thou aunswerest1 by doing that
 which ,god hath commaunded in his      
worde3  then would ,i knowe of thee1    
whether that of ,paul be ,canonicall or 

,apocripha1 ,he that resisteth the      
magistrate1 resisteth the ordinaunce of 
,god4 ,and here ,i am sure to be had by 
the eares with a ,geneua note of the    
distinction of magistrates1 but all that
 shall not serue your turnes1  for ,ile 
driue you from your ,dic ,ecclesi ere ,i
 have done1 ware the  vnmasking of      
,martin1 when it comes tis lyke to bee a
 shrewde ,pistle1  ,i can tell you4     
,prepare your argumentes as you will1   
for ,mar-,martin  ,iunior1 meanes to    
make such hauocke of you in that his    
next peece of  seruice1 as all your     
borrowed weapons of simple ,t4 ,c4 shall
 not bee  able to withstande4 ,for your 
olde soaking ,demonstrationer1 that hath
  scrapte vp such a deale of ,scripture 
to so lyttle purpose1 ,ile leaue his    
confusion to the vacaunt leasure of our 
grauer ,diuines1 who ,i knowe1  did they
 but once sette penne to paper1 woulde  
grinde his discipline  to powder4 ,thou 
art the man1 olde ,martin of ,englande1 
that ,i am to  deale withall1 that      

striues to outstrip all our writers in  
witte1 and  iustle our gouernement forth
 of doores with a iest4 ,what1 wee must 
not  let you passe with such fauourable 
tearmes1 as our graue ,fathers haue     
done1 your ,bookes must bee lookt ouer1 
and you beaten lyke a dogge for  your   
lying4 ,i thinke1 ,i thinke ,i shall    
haue occasion to close with you         
sweetlie in your ,hay anie worke for a  
,cooper1 and cutte off the traynes  of  
your tedious syllogismes1 that nowe haue
 no lesse then seauen or  eight ,termini
 waiting on them4 ,fortifie your ruinous
 buildinges betimes1  and saie hee was  
your friende that badde you3 for ,i can 
tell you thus  much1 a whole hoast of   
,pasquils are comming vppon you1 who    
will so  beleaguer your paper walles1 as
 that not one idle worde shall escape   
the  edge of their wit4 ,i giue thee but
 a brauado now1 to let thee knowe ,i am 
thine enemie1 but the next time you see 
,mar-,martine in armes1 bidde  your     
sonnes and your familie prouide them to 

,god-warde1 for ,i am eagerly  bent to  
revenge1 and not one of them shall      
escape1 no not ,t4 ,c4 himselfe  as full
 as he is of his myracles4 ,but to      
pursue maister ,protestationer  in his  
common place of persecution4 ,i remember
 we talkt euen now of a  dudgen         
destinction from which my ,bedlam       
brother ,wig4 and poltfoote  ,pag4 with 
the rest of those patches1 striue to    
deriue theyr discipline  disobedience4  
,our ,ecclesiasticall gouernment and    
gouernours say they1 are  wicked and    
vnlawfull4 ,why8 because ,sir ,peter nor
 ,sir ,paul were neuer  ,archbishoppes  
of ,canterbury1 ,london1 or ,yorke4     
,they were ,fisher-men1 and  were not   
able4 ,when ,csars ,officers demaunded  
their tribute to make  fiue groates     
amongst them1 then what reason is it our
 ,bishoppes should  inioy their five    
hundreds1 nay1 that which is more1 their
 thousand  and two thousands8 ,they were
 none of these ,cartercaps1 ,graduates  
nor  ,doctors1 therfore why should we   

tie our ,ministrie to the prophane      
studies  of the ,vniuersitie4 ,what is  
,logicke but the highe waie to          
wrangling1  contayning in it a world of 
bibble babble4 ,neede we anie of your   
,greeke1  ,latine1 ,hebrue1 or anie such
 gibbrige1 when wee haue the word of    
,god in  ,english8 ,go to1 go to1 you   
are a great company of vaine men1 that  
stand  vpon your degrees and tongues1   
with tittle tattle1 ,i cannot tell what1
  when as 7if you looke into the matter 
as you ought7 the ,apostles knew  neare 
a ,letter of the booke4 ,i wis it were  
not two pins hurt1 if your  ,colledges  
wer fired ouer your heades1 and you     
turnde a begging forth  your            
fellowshippes1 like ,fryers and ,monkes 
vp and downe the ,countrie4 ,i  marie   
sir1 this is somewhat like1 now ,martin 
speakes like himselfe1  ,i dare saie for
 him good man1 he could be contented    
there were nere a  maister of ,art1     
,bachelour of ,diuinitie1 ,doctor or    
,bishop in ,england1  on that condition 

he prest ,fishermen1 scullers1 ,coopers1
 ,stitchers1  ,weauers and ,coblers into
 theyr places4 ,you talke of a ,harmonie
 of the  ,churches1 but heere would be a
 consort of knauerie worth the          
publishing  to all posteritie4 ,would   
you not laugh to see ,cli4 the ,cobler1 
and  ,new4 the souter1 ierking out theyr
 elbowes in euerie ,pulpit4 ,why1 ,i  am
 sure ,ladie ,law4 would fast mans flesh
 a whole moneth together1 but  shee     
woulde giue either of them a gowne cloth
 on that condition4 ,my  self doe knowe 
a zealous ,preacher in ,ipswich1 that   
beeing but a while a  goe a stage       
player1 will now take vpon him to       
brandish a ,text agaynst  ,bishoppes1 as
 well as the best ,martinist in all     
,suffolke4 ,why1 ,i praie  you goe no   
farther then ,batter1 haue wee not there
 a reuerent ,pastour of  ,martines owne 
making1 that vnderstands not a bit of   
,latine1 nor neuer  dyd so much as looke
 towards the ,vniuersitie in his life1  
yet you see  for a neede he can helpe   

discipline out of the durt1 and come    
ouer our  ,cleargie verie handsomely    
with an heere is to bee noted4 ,oh he is
 olde  dogge at expounding1 and deade   
sure at a ,catechisme1 alwayes prouided1
  that it bee but halfe a sheete long1  
and he be two yeeres about it4 ,and     
well too my maisters1 for such a one    
that vauntes himselfe to bee as hee  is1
 as good a ,gentleman euerie inch of    
him1 as anie is in all ,stafford        
sheere4 ,bee what he will1 one thing ,i 
wote1 hee is seldome without a good     
,cheese in his studie1 besides apples   
and nuttes1 although his wife can  neuer
 come at them4 ,i hearde not long since 
of a stoute conference hee  had with a  
yong scholer1 who taking my ,deske-man  
somewhat tardie in his  disputations1   
told him hee was inspired with too much 
,logique4 ,where vnto  hee replyed with 
this solempne protestati1 ,i thank ,god1
 al the world  cannot accuse me of that 
arte4 ,i hope anon maister ,martin1 ,i  
shall bee  meetelie euen with you for   

your knauerie1 if ,i goe but two mile   
further  in your ,ministrie4 ,it is not 
the ,primitiue ,church shall beare out  
the  ,vicar of little ,down4 in         
,norfolke1 in groaping his owne hennes1 
like a  ,cotqueane1 ,i am to come ouer  
him when ,i have more leasure1 for his  
tenne  shillings ,sermons at ,thetforde3
 wherein if he raue as hee was wont to  
doe1 ,ile make him wishe that hee had   
been still ,vsher of ,westminister4     
,well1 to the purpose4 ,you saie        
,bishoppes are no ,magistrates1 because 
they are no lawfull ,magistrates4 ,is it
 euen so brother ,timothie1  will it    
neuer be better1 must ,i euer leade you 
vp and downe antiquitie  by the nose    
lyke an ,asse4 ,may neither ,scriptures 
nor ,fathers goe for  paiment with you1 
but still you will bee reducing vs to   
the president  of the persecuted        
,church1 and so confounde the discipline
 of warre and  peace8 ,if you will      
needes make vs the apes of all their    
extremities1  why doe not you vrge the  

vse of that communitie wherein ,ananias 
and  ,saphira were vnfaythfull4         
,perswade ,noble men and ,gentlemen to  
sell  theyr landes1 and laie the money  
at your feete1 take awaie the title of  
mine and thine from amongst vs1 and let 
the worlde knowe you heereafter  by the 
name of ,anabaptistes4 ,admit that the  
authoritie of ,bishoppes were  as       
vnlawfull as you woulde make it1 yet    
since it is imposed vnto them  by the   
,princes owne mouth1 and ratified by the
 approbation of so many  ,kings and     
,emperours1 as well in their particular 
,parliamentes as generall  counsayles1  
you are bounde in conscience to         
reuerence it1 and in all  humilitie to  
regarde it1 insomuch as ,christ denide  
not tribute to ,csar  an vsurper1 nor   
appealde from ,pilate a ,pagan1 who     
occupied that place  by the intrusion of
 tyrannie4 ,were the ,israelites in     
captiuitie1 anie  whit exempted from the
 obedience of subiectes1 in that they   
liued vnder  the scepter of             

,nabuchodonesor an ,idolater1 who had   
blasphemed their  ,god1 defaced their   
,temple1 and defiled their holie        
vesselles4 ,nay1 are  they not          
expresslie commaunded by the ,lordes    
owne mouth1 to honour him as  their     
,king3 ,howe can they then escape the   
dampnation of contempte1 that  beeing   
priuate subiectes to such a vertuous    
,soueraigne1 as is zealous of  ,gods    
glorie will controll her1 disposing of  
honours1 and oppose vnto  publique      
derision1 those the especiall pillers   
and ornamentes of her  state1 whome shee
 hath graced from their infancie1 with  
so many sundrie  ascentes of dignities4 
,but were this all1 then shoulde not    
treason  bee such a braunche of your    
religion as it is4 ,haue not you and    
your  followers vndermined her ,graces  
,throane1 as much as traytours might3   
call  to minde the badde practise of    
your brother the ,booke-binder and his  
accomplishes at ,burie1 who beeing as   
hotte spirited as your worshippes1  in  

the schismaticall subiect of            
reformation1 and seeing it woulde not   
come of halfe kindlie to theyr          
contentment1 made no more a doe1 but    
added  this newe ,posie to her          
,maiesties armes4 ,those that bee       
neither hotte nor  colde1 ,ile spue them
 out of my mouth1 sayth the ,lorde4     
,denie this1 and  ,ile bring a whole    
,assizes1 as ,obsignatos testes of your 
trecherie4 ,to  come neerer to thee     
,brother ,martin4 ,hast not thou in thy 
firste booke  agaynst ,doctour ,bridges1
 as also in ,hay anie worke for ,cooper1
 excluded  her ,highnesse from all      
,ecclesiasticall gouernement1 saying she
 hath  neyther skill nor commission1 as 
shee is a ,magistrate1 to substitute    
anie  member or minister in the ,church4
 ,and in an other place1 that there is  
neither vse nor place in the ,church for
 members1 ministers or officers  of the 
magistrates making4 ,if this wyll not   
come in compasse of treason1  then      
farewell the title of ,supremacie1 and  

welcome agayne vnto ,poperie4  ,by this 
time ,i thinke1 good-man ,puritan1 that 
thou art perswaded1 that ,i  knowe as   
well as thy owne conscience thee1 namely
 ,martin ,makebate of  ,englande1 to bee
 a moste scuruie and beggerlie          
benefactor to obedience1  and per       
consequens1 to feare neyther men1 nor   
that ,god who can cast  both bodie and  
soule into vnquenchable fire4 ,in which 
respect ,i neyther  account you of the  
,churche1 nor esteeme of your bloude1   
otherwise then  the bloude of           
,infidelles4 ,talke as long as you will 
of the ioyes of  heauen1 or paines of   
hell1 and turne from your selues the    
terrour of  that iudgement howe you     
will1 which shall bereaue blushing      
iniquitie  of the figge leaues of       
hypocrisie1 yet will the eie of         
immortalitie  discerne of your painted  
pollutions1 as the euer-liuing foode of 
perdition4 ,the humours of my eies are  
the habitations of fountaines1 and  the 
circumference of my heart the enclosure 

of fearefull contrition1  when ,i thinke
 howe many soules at that moment1 shall 
carrie the name  of ,martine on their   
foreheads to the vale of confusion1 in  
whose  innocent bloude thou swimming to 
hell1 shalt haue the tormentes of tenne 
thousande thousande sinners at once1    
inflicted vppon thee4 ,there will       
enuie1 mallice and dissimulation bee    
euer calling for vengeance agaynst      
thee1 and incite whole legions of       
deuilles to thy deathlesse lamentation4 
,mercie will saie vnto thee1 ,i knowe   
thee not1 and ,repentaunce1 what  have  
,i to doe with thee4 ,all hopes shall   
shake the head at thee1 and  saie1 there
 goes the poyson of puritie1 the        
perfection of impietie1 the  serpentine 
seducer of simplicitie4 ,zeale her selfe
 will crie out vppon  thee1 and curse   
the time that euer shee was maskte by   
thy mallice1  who lyke a blinde leader  
of the blinde1 sufferedst her to stumble
 at  euerie steppe in ,religion1 and    
madest her seeke in the dimnesse of her 

sight1 to murther her mother the        
,churche1 from whose pappes thou lyke an
  enuious dogge but yesterdaie pluckest 
her4 ,howe euer proude scorner1 thy     
whoorishe impudencie1 may happen        
heereafter to insiste in the derision of
  these fearfull denuntiations1 and     
sporte thy iesters penne at the speach  
of my soule1 yet take heede least       
despayre bee predominant in the daie of 
thy death1 and thou in steade of calling
 for mercie to thy ,iesus1 repeate  more
 oftner to thy selfe1 ,sic morior       
damnatus vt ,iudas6 ,and thus much      
,martin1 in the way of compassion1 haue 
,i spoke for thy edification1  moued    
therto by a brotherly commiseration1    
which if thou bee not too  desperate in 
thy deuilish attempts1 may reform thy   
heart to remorse1 and  thy pamphletes to
 some more profitable theame of         
repentance4 ,but now haue  at thee for  
the goodnesse of the cause1 of which    
thou saist3 ,we must not  reason from   
the successe4    ,trust me therein thou 

hast spoke wiser then thou art aware of1
 for if  a man should imagine of fruite 
by the rottennesse1 of garmentes by the 
moath frets1 of wine by the sowrnesse1  
,i warrant him for euer being  good     
costerd-monger1 broker1 or vintner      
whiles he liues4 ,therefore we  must not
 measure of ,martin as he is allied to  
,elderton1 or tongd  like ,will ,tong1  
as he was attired like an ,ape on y     
stage1 or sits  writing of ,pphlets1 in 
some spare out-house1 but as is         
,mar-,prelat of  ,england as he         
surpasseth ,king and collier1 in crying1
 ,so ho ho1 brother  ,bridges4 ,wo ho   
ho1 ,iohn a ,london4 ,ha ha he1 ,doctor 
,copecotes4 ,doe  this and ,i warrant   
you1 for sauoring of the fleshe1 though 
you take the  oportunity of the spirite1
 with euery sister in ,christ4 ,beholde 
the state  of the low ,countryes1 since 
your ,plaintife ,pistler1 will needs    
make the  comparison1 suppose ,martin to
 be the map of ,belgia dilacerata1 whose
  chiefe prouinces as they are wholye   

possessed with ,spaniards1 so thinke    
his hart and soule enhabited with spiet1
 they ,romists in the matter  of        
,religion1 and he a ,papist in          
supremacies contradiction1 her inward   
partes possessed with ,anabaptists1 and 
,lutherans1 and his more priuate        
opinions polluted with the dregs of them
 both1 her farthest borders of  ,holland
 and ,zeland1 peopled ,god wot with a   
small number of vnperfite  ,protestants1
 and the furthest and fewest of his     
thoughts1 taken vppe with  some odde    
true points of ,religion4 ,how now      
,father ,martin1 haue not ,i  hit your  
meaning patte in this comparison4 ,say1 
wil you haue any more  such             
interpretations1 if you say ,amen to it4
 ,ile also reconcile your  allegoricall 
induction of ,france1 to the present    
constituti of your  frowardnes3 but that
 shal not neede1 since the misery of the
 one is the  mirrour of the other1 and  
the ,reader must suppose that ,martin   
would  neare haue compared himselfe to  

,flaunders nor ,france1 but as they     
reflect  by allusion the distraction of 
his factions faith4 ,howe euer you take 
him at the worst1 yet is his welchnes   
perswaded1 that the ,lord hath some     
speciell purpose1 by preuentinge of his 
presse1 to try who they be that  are    
hipocrites1 and what they be y are      
innocent3 ,and not vnlike too1 for      
hauing interrupted the trafique of      
honestye1 so long as thou hast with  thy
 coterfet knauery1 tis more the hie time
 thy vnder-hd treachery1  were broght to
 the touchstone of authority4 ,you think
 we know not how  pretily your ,printers
 were shrouded vnder the name of        
salt-peter-men1 so  that who but        
,hodgkins1 ,tomlins and ,sims1 at the   
vndermining of a  house1 and vndoing of 
poore men1 by diggyng vp their floars1  
and breaking  down their wals4 ,no1 no1 
we neuer heard how orderly they         
pretended the  printing of ,accidences1 
when my ,l4 of ,darbies men came to see 
what they  were a doing1 what though    

they damned themselues about the deniall
 of  the deede1 is periury such a matter
 amongst puritans4 ,tush they account   
it no sin as long as it is in the way of
 protestation1 being in the mind  of a  
good old fellow in ,cambridge1 who      
sitting in ,s4 ,iohns as ,senior  at the
 fellowes election1 was reprehended by  
some of his betters1 for  that hee gaue 
his voice with a dunce like himself1    
contrary to oath1  statue and           
conscience3 why quoth hee1 ,i neither   
respect oath1 statue1  nor conscience1  
but only the glory of ,god4 ,men are by 
men and may erre1  yea goodman ,spe4    
himselfe in ,paules church-yard1        
although he saith  he hath no sinne1    
what maruaile is it then1 though some   
corruption  cleaue vnto our aged        
,gentleman by his owne confession4      
,learne of me to  iudge charitably1 and 
thinke that nature tooke a scouring     
purgation1  when she voided all her     
imperfections in the birth of one       
,martin3  which if it be so1 hee is not 

to be blamed1 since as ,arist4 sayes1   
vitia natur n sunt reprehendenda4 ,gibe 
on1 gibe on1 and see if your  father    
,mar-martin will beare you out in it or 
no1 you thinke the good  sweet-faced    
prelate1 ,masse ,martin1 hath neuer     
broke sword in ruffians  hal1 yes that  
he hath more then one or two1 if the    
truth were known1 and  fought for his   
wench as brauely as the best of them    
all1 therefore take  heede how you come 
in his way1 least hee belabour you with 
his crabtree  stile for your lustines1  
and teache you howe to looke into a     
,martins  neaste againe while you live4 
,alas you are but young1 and neuer knewe
  what his ,bumfeging ment1 for if you  
did1 you woulde thinke fiue hundreth    
fistes about your eares1 were more then 
,phisicke in a frosty morning4  ,write  
or fight which you will1 our champion is
 for you at all weapones1  whether you  
choose the worde or the sworde1 neither 
comes amisse to him1  he neuer took his 
domesticall dissention in hand to leaue 

it soone4 ,all  ,england must bee vp    
together by the eares1 before his penne 
rest in  peace1 nor shall his rebellious
 mutinies1 which he shrouds vnder the   
age of ,martinisme1 haue any            
intermedium1 till religions prosperity  
and our ,christian libertye1 mis-termed 
of him by the last yeare of             
,lambethisme1 doe perishe from amongst  
vs1 and depart to our enemies3 then     
shall you see1 what seditious buildinges
 will arise on the vnfortunate          
foundations of his folly1 and what      
contentious increase will come from  the
 schoole of contempt4      ,if they will
 needes ouerthrowe mee let them goe in  
hand with the  exploite c4    ,holla1   
holla brother ,martin1 you are to hasty1
 what1 ,winter is no time  to make      
warres in1 you were best stay til       
summer1 and then both our  brains wilbe 
in a better temperature1 but ,i think   
ere that time your  witte wilbe welny   
worn thredbare1 and your banquerout     
inuention1 cleane  out at the elbowes1  

then are we well holpen vp with a       
witnesse1 if the  aged champion of      
,warwicke1 doe not lay to his shoulders1
 and support  discipline ready to lie in
 the dust1 with some or other           
demonstration4  ,i can tell you ,phil4  
,stu4 is a tall man also for that       
purpose4 ,what  his ,anatomy of ,abuses 
for all that1 will serue very fitly for 
an  ,antipast1 before one of ,egertons  
,sermons1 ,i would see the best of  your
 ,trauerses write such a treatise as he 
hath done1 against short  heeld         
pantoffles4 ,but one thing it is great  
pitty of him1 that being  such a good   
fellow as hee is1 hee shoulde speake    
against dice1 so as  he doth3           
neuerthelesse ther is some hope of him1 
for as ,i heard not  lg since1 a brother
 of his1 meting him by chance 7as       
theeues meete  at the gallowes7 after   
many christian questions of the well    
fare of  his persecuted brethren1 and   
sistern1 askt him when they should haue 
a  game at tables together1 by the grace

 of ,god the next ,sabaoth1 quoth       
,phil4 and then if it shal so seeme good
 to his prouidence1 haue at  you for    
ames ase and the dise4 ,i forgette to   
tel you what a stirre he  keepes against
 dumbe ministers1 and neuer writes nor  
talkes of them1  but hee calleth them   
minstrels1 when his mastershippe in his 
minority1  plaide the ,reader in        
,chesshire1 for fiue marke a yeare and a
 canuas  dublet1 couenanted besides1    
that in consideration of that stipend1  
he  make cleane the patrones bootes     
euerye time hee came to towne4 ,what    
need more words to proue him a protestt1
 did not he behaue himselfe  like a true
 ,christian1 when hee went a wooing for 
his friend ,clarke1  ,i warrant you hee 
saide not ,god saue you1 or ,god speed  
you1 with good  euen or good morrow1 as 
our prophane woers are wont1 but stept  
close to  her1 with peace bee with you1 
very demurely1 and then told her a long 
tale1 that in so much as widowhoode1 was
 an vncleane lyfe1 and subiect  to many 

temptations1 shee might doe well to     
reconcile her selfe to the  ,church of  
,god1 in the holy ordinance of          
matrimony4 ,manye wordes past  to this  
purpose1 but ,i wotte well the          
conclusion was this1 that since  she had
 hitherto conuerst with none but        
vnregenerate persons1 and was  vtterly  
carelesse of the communion of ,saints1  
she would let him that was  a man of    
,god1 put a new spirite into her1 by    
carnall population1 and so  engraft her 
into the fellowshippe of the faithfull1 
to which that shee  might more willingly
 agree1 hee offered her a spicke and    
spanne new  ,geneua ,bible1 that his    
attendant ,italian had brought with him 
to make  vp the bargaine4 ,but for all  
the ,scripture he could alledge1 it     
should  not bee1 ,phil4 ,stu4 was no    
meate for her tooth1 ,god wote he could 
not  get a penyworth of leachery on such
 a pawne as his ,bible was1 the man     
behinde the painted cloth mard all1 and 
so ,o griefe1 a good ,sabaoths  day work

 was lost4 ,stand to it ,mar-martin     
,iunior and thou art good  inough for   
ten thousand of them1 tickle me my      
,phil4 a litle more in the  flanke1 and 
make him winche like a resty iade1      
whereto a dreaming deuine  of           
,cambridge1 in a certain priuate ,sermon
 of his1 compared the wicked4  ,saist   
thou me so good heart1 then haue at you 
,maister ,compositor1 with  the         
constructi of ,sunt oculos clari qui    
cernis sydera tanquam4 ,if  you be      
remembred you were once put to your     
trumpes about it in ,wolfes             
,printing-house1 when as you would      
needes haue clari the infinitiue  moode 
of a verbe passiue1 which determined you
 went forwards after this  order4 ,sunt 
there are1 oculos eies1 qui the which1  
cernis thou  doest see1 clari to be     
cleare1 tanquam sydera as the ,stars4   
,excellent  well done of an old ,maister
 of ,arte1 yet why may not hee by       
authority  challenge to himselfe for    
this one peece of worke the degrees hee 

neuer  tooke4 ,learning is a iewel my   
maisters1 make much of it1 and ,phil4   
,stu4 a ,gendeman euery haire of his    
head1 whom although you doe not  regard 
according as he deserues1 yet ,i warrant
 you ,martin makes more  account of him 
then so1 who hath substituted him long  
since 7if the truth  were well boulted  
out7 amongst the number of those priuy  
,martinists1  which he threatens to     
place in euery parish4 ,i am more then  
halfe weary  of tracing too and fro in  
this cursed common wealth1 where sinfull
  simplicitye pufte vppe with the pride 
of singularity1 seekes to peruerte  the 
name and methode of magistracy4 ,but as 
the most of their arguments1  are drawn 
from our graue fathers infirmities1 so  
al their outrageous  endeuors haue their
 ofspring from affected vainglory4      
,agreeing with the  saying of ,hug4     
8,innobedienti morbus ex superbi tumore 
procedit1  sicut sanies ex vlcere40#a   
,the disease of disobedience proceeds   
from  the swelling of pride1 as madnesse

 from some vntollerable vlcer4 ,the     
cause whereof ,gregory thus             
expresseth4#b 8,dum plus exquirunt0     
saith  he1 8contemplando quam capiunt1  
vsque ad peruersa dogmata erumpunt1  et 
dum veritatis discipuli esse negligunt1 
humiliter magistri erroris  fiunt40     
,whiles by study they search out more   
then they vnderstand1 they  breake forth
 into peruerse opinions1 and whiles they
 neglect to be the  schollers of truth1 
they most basely become the             
schoolemaisters of  error4 ,for such is 
the boldnesse of our boyish deuines1    
that they will  leape into the pulpet1  
before they haue learned ,stans puer ad 
mensam1  and talke very desperately of  
dicipline1 before they can construe1    
,qui  mihi discipulus4 8,qui venit      
institui0 saith ,cassiodorus1 8antequam 
instituatur1 alios instituere cupit10 c4
 ,the nouice that comes to be  informed1
 desireth to enforme others1 before he  
bee enformed himselfe1  and to teach    
before hee bee taught1 to prescribe     

lawes before he hath  redde ,litleton1  
and play the subtile ,philosopher1      
before he knowes  the order of his      
sillables3 he wil needes haue subiects1 
before he can  subiugate his affections1
 and couets the office of a commander1  
before he  hath learned to stoupe to the
 admonitions of his elders1 and         
beginneth  to instruct and perswade1    
before he bee instructed and perswaded  
in  any kind of art1 which their folly  
once fuelled with y frowardnesse  of    
blind zeal1 makes th cfound ctempt with 
gods true worship1 and  open their      
mouths against his ordinance1 as did the
 ,prophets against  ,ieroboams hil      
altars4 ,t4 ,c4 in ,cambridge first     
inuented this violent  innouation1 when 
as his mounting ambition1 went through  
euery kinde  of ,ambitus1 to compasse   
the office of the ,vicechauncelour-ship4
  ,but after he saw himselfe disfauourd 
in his first insolence1 and that  the   
suffrages of the vniuersity1 would not  
discend to his dissentious  indignityes1

 his seditious discontent deuised the   
meanes to discredite  that gouernement1 
which he through his il behauiour might 
not aspire  to4 ,th began his inueterat 
malice1 to vndermine the foundations of 
our  societies1 and reduce our          
,colledges to the schooles of the       
,prophets1 to  discard all degrees of   
art as antichristian1 to condemne all   
decency  in the ministery as            
diabolicall1 and exclude all            
ecclesiasticall  superiority forth the  
,church as ,apocripha4 ,no sooner had   
these new  fangled positions entred the 
tables of young students1 but           
,singularity  the eldest childe of      
heresy1 consulted with male-conted      
melcholy1  how to bring this misbegott  
scisme to a monarchy4 ,to which purpose 
hipocriticall zeale1 was addrest as a   
pursuiuant into all places of  ,suff4   
,norff4 ,essex and ,midlesex1 with      
expresse commandement from the  sinod of
 ,saints1 to proclaime ,t4 ,c4 supreme  
head of the ,church4 ,this  past on     

thus1 whiles the sworde of iustice1     
slept in his scaberd1 whose  vnprouident
 eie neglecting the beginning of such   
burnings1 hath added  a more confirmed  
fury to the flame1 which hath now taken 
hold on y  buildings of our bishopricks4
 ,how it hath raged in those quarters   
before  mentioned to y vtter            
impouerishing of the allegeance of the  
communalty1  and lamentable vndoing of  
the estimation of diuers other knights  
and  gentlemen1 the whole course of the 
high commission may testify4 ,nether    
was this plague of apostacy vndeserued  
of their inconstancy1 who forsook  y    
true service of ,god1 to worship the    
idoll of ,warwicke4 ,put case his       
reading be gret and his malice more1    
that he hath plodded through ten  cart  
loade of paper1 and bin the death of ten
 thousand pound of candels1  yet as     
,gregory saith1 8perit omne quod agitur1
 si non humilitate  custodiatur40#c     
,whatsoeuer is done doth vanish to      
infamy1 if it be not  vpholden by       

humility3 ,what childe doth not see into
 the pride of his  heart1 that first    
entertained the impudency of controlling
 antiquity1 and  preferd the poison of  
his owne peruerse opinions1 before the  
experience  of so many ,churches1       
counsails and fathers4 8,qu maior       
superioria10 saith  ,bernarde1 8quam vt 
vnus homo toti congregationi iudicium   
suum preferat  tanqu ipse solus habeat  
spirit ,dei40#d ,what greater pride then
 that  one man should aduance his       
iudgement1 aboue the sentence of a whole
  congregation1 as if he alone had the  
spirit of ,god4 ,pride ouerthrew the    
towr of ,babell1 prostrated ,golias1 hg 
vp ,haman1 kild ,nichanor1  consumed    
,herod1 destroied ,antiochus1 drowned   
,pharao1 subuerted  ,senacherib1 and ,i 
hope will also confound arrogant ,t4,c4 
and all his  accomplishes in the ,lords 
good time4 ,and now that ,i haue        
vnburdened my  shoulders of the weight  
of his learning1 ,ile ribroste my       
brother ,martin  a litle1 for obiecting 

to my ,lord ,archbishop1 the not        
answering of his  bookes4 ,therefore    
first would ,i know of sweete ,m4 sauce 
malapert whether  he would haue the care
 of the common-wealth1 and forseing     
consultation  of domestical and forreine
 affaires1 resigned to the retorting of 
,t4 ,c4  his vnreuerent railings4 ,next 
what such equall proportion his         
mastership  finds in their places1 that 
the grauity and mildnes of the one1     
should  stoupe his attention so low1 as 
the iangling leuity of the other4 ,were 
there no other thing to refrayn his     
grace1 from combating with a common     
barretour then this1 that in discordia  
nemo benedicit ,dominum1 it were        
sufficient to pleade his absence from   
this inferiour fight4 ,but when he      
considers that saiyng of ,augustine1    
8,nullus est modus inimicitiis1 nisi  ob
 tempus obtperemus iratis10 ther is no  
meane of mallice1 vnles for a  time we  
giue place to the furious1 and that     
which another sais1 8,sicut  nihil est  

deformius quam respondere furiosis ita1 
nihil vtilius quam  tacere prouocatis40 
,as there is nothing more vnseemely then
 to aunswere  the froward1 so there is  
nothing more profitable then scilence to
 such as  are prouokt4 ,let him vse the 
libertye of his speache as hee please1  
and  detracte from his learninge in what
 tearmes hee see cause1 yet will all    
,christendome admire his perfection1    
when ,t4 ,c4 his singularitie shall go  
a begging vp and downe the low          
,countries4 ,i will not gainsaie but    
your  reuerend ,pastor may haue as      
knauish a vaine in writing as your      
selfe1 and  fasten a slander on the     
,saintes of heauen1 as soone as anie of 
your sect1  for 8nil tam facile est10 as
 ,ierom sayth1 8quam ociosum et         
dormientem  de aliorum labore et        
vigiliis disputare40#e ,there is nothing
 so easie  for a man that is sluggish   
and idle1 as to call in question others 
mens  watchings and labours4 8,mens     
praua10 sayth ,gregorie#f 8semper in    

laboribus est1 quia aut molitur mala qu 
inferat1 vel metuit ne sibi ab  aliis   
infent1 et quicquid contra proximos     
cogitat1 hoc contra se1 a  proximus     
cogitari formidat40 ,a wicked mind liues
 in continuall toile1  because it eyther
 meditates the iniuries which he is     
about to inferre1  or feares some       
reproch to be inferred by others1 and   
whatsoeuer hee  pretendes agaynst his   
neighbor1 the same he mistrusts to be   
pretended  against himselfe4 ,if ,t4 ,c4
 hath made thee his atturney1 to vrge   
the not  answering of his bookes1 then  
,i praie thee bee my ,mercurie this     
once1 and  tell him thus much from      
,mar-,martine1 that he hath vndone more 
,printers  with his py-bald pamphlets1  
then his dish-clout dicipline will sette
 vp  agayne this seauen yeeres4 ,much   
inkehorne stuffe hath hee vttered in a  
iarring stile1 and intruded a greate    
deale of trashe to our eares by a       
daintie figure of idem peridem1 but for 
anie new peece of arte he hath  shewed  

in those idle editions1 other then that 
his famous aduersary hath  before time  
confuted1 he may wel enough bequeth it  
to ,dunce or ,dorbel1  whce his         
blundering capacity is lineally         
descended4 ,what maister ,t4,c4  you    
think that no man dare touch you1       
because you haue plaid the scuruie      
scolde anie time these twentie yeeres1  
but ,ile so hamper your holynes for  all
 the offences of your youth1 as all     
geering puritans shall haue small  cause
 to insult and reioyce at my silence4   
,then see whether ,i dare stand  to the 
defence of your defame or no4 ,take     
heede good-man ,howlyglasse1  that ,i   
make not such a hole in your coate the  
nexte ,tearme1 as ,martine  and his     
sonnes shall not sowe vp in hast1 ,i tel
 you ,i am a shreud fellow  at the      
vncasing of a fox1 and haue cats eyes to
 looke into euerie corner  of a         
,puritans house4 ,i warrant you my      
brother ,pag4 will saie so1 by  that    
time ,i haue talkte with him a little1  

who although hee bee none of  the       
straightest men that euer ,god made1 yet
 hath he as good skill in  milche       
bullocks1 as anie huswife within fortie 
miles of his head4 ,let him  alone1 and 
if he doe not know by a cowes water1 how
 many pintes of milke  she will give in 
a yeere1 then wyll he neuer help his    
wife to make cheese  agayn whiles hee   
liues3 and without offence to his       
,pastorshippe bee it  spoken1 hee will  
saie pretyly well to a henne1 if shee   
bee not too olde1  alwayes prouided1    
shee haue a neaste of cleane strawe in  
his studie1 and  hee groape her with his
 owne handes euening and morning4 ,then 
see if hee  doe not make three pounds a 
yeere of her ouer and aboue all costes  
and  charges4 ,i marie sir1 is not this 
a husbande in deede1 that besides the   
multiplying of the ,church of ,god1 in  
his householde ministerie1 will  keepe  
his wife and familie by crosse bargaines
 a whole twelue moneth4  ,what woulde he
 doe my maisters1 if he had two good    

legges1 that wil thus  bestirre him in  
his vocation with one and a stump4 ,the 
world may saie  he is lame1 and so      
forth1 but hee that had seene him runne 
from ,houns  the other daie1 for getting
 his maide with childe1 woulde neuer    
thinke  so4 ,i meruaile with what face  
our ,bishoppes could depriue such a man 
of  ,god1 that beeing knowen to bee a   
most heauenly whooremaister1 a passing  
zealous worldling1 and a most mortified 
schismatique1 was fitter iwis to  teache
 men then boyes4 ,bee ruled by ,martine1
 and send him home into  ,deuonsheere1  
or else hee will wrappe all your        
,cleargie once agayne in  ,lazarus      
winding sheete4 ,which fauour if hee    
obtayne contrarie to desert1  ,i woulde 
wishe him as a friend1 neare more to    
vrge ,fathers to sweare at  the ,funt1  
that the children that are brought      
thether to be christned1  are of none   
but their owne begetting1 lest olde     
,ragdale plie him as  he did in times   
past1 about the shoulders with his plowe

 staffe4 ,haue  with you ,giles ,wig4 to
 ,sidborough1 and let us haue you make  
another  ,sermon of ,sedgwickes         
pack-prickes3 or such another ,prayer as
 you did  of three hours long1 when as a
 friend of yours 7that best knew your   
armes7 cast in the ,rammes homes at your
 windowe4 ,if you be remembred1  it was 
the same time1 when you cride1 ,come    
wife1 come seruants1 let vs  fall on our
 knees1 and praie to the ,lorde ,god to 
deliuer vs from all  euill temptation1  
for the deuill is euen new gone by1 and 
looke where he  hath throwne in his     
hornes at the windowe4 ,giles1 ,giles1  
,i haue to  talke with you for your     
saucinesse with the right ,honorable the
 ,earle of  ,huntington1 in whose       
presence you 7though of all other       
vnworthie7 then  beeing1 when conuersant
 with other ,gentlemen1 hee calde for a 
boule of  ,beere1 which brought1 and set
 downe by him1 and he yet busie in      
talke1  you tooke verie orderlie from   
before him1 and trilled it off without  

anie more bones1 bidding his man if he  
would1 goe fill him another4  ,and what 
of all this ,i praie you1 was that such 
a wonderous matter1  doth ,giles care   
for anie of your ,lordes1 ,earles1      
,barons or ,bishops4  ,no1 no1 no       
barrell better herring with him3 we are 
all made of one  and the selfe same     
molde1 and ,adam signifieth but red     
earth4 ,i could  tell you a tale worth  
the hearing1 that would counteruaile    
,glib4 of  ,haustead1 were it not that  
it woulde make ,m4 ,wig4 as cholerike1  
as  when he burst in the ,church maugre 
excmunication1 and knockt the keies     
about y ,sextens head1 for not opening  
vnto him4 ,come on it what wil1  in     
spite of midsmer moone1 you shal haue it
 as it is1 therefore attend  good people
 to the vnfortunate sequele4 ,g4 ,w4 of 
,wig4 house1 in the  land of little     
,wittam1 chosen to the place and        
function of a pastor1 by  those reuerend
 elders of the ,church1 ,hicke1 ,hob and
 ,john1 ,cutbert ,c4 the  ,cobler1 and  

,new4 the broomseller cum multis aliis  
que nunc prescribere  longum est1 at    
length seased 7after many yeeres        
stragling7 on the  superintendentship of
 ,sidborough1 wher hauing worn out three
 or four  pulpits with the vnreasonable 
bounsing of his fistes1 it was his      
chance  on a time to haue one quarrell  
more to another of them3 so that no     
sooner  mounted on her backe1 but he    
began to spurre her with his heeles1 to 
boxe her about the eares with his       
elbowes1 and so pittiously misuse her   
in euerie part1 as would haue greeued   
anie heathen ,ioyner to the heart1  to  
beholde4 ,nor coulde his ,text containe 
him in this choler1 or pleade  anie     
pardon or pittie for this poore pulpit1 
but he wold needes ride her  to death   
from one ,diocesse to another1 from     
,yorke to ,london1 from ,london  to     
,canterbury1 from ,canterburie to       
,winchester1 and all without a baite1   
insomuch1 that tyred in his waie        
homeward to his ,text1 he had stucke in 

the myre for anie more matter hee had1  
had not ,iohn a ,borhead come into  the 
church as he did4 ,whom he espying in   
good time1 crost the midwaie  of a      
sentence to let flie at him in this     
manner4 ,as for the discipline  which   
those wretches doe hinder1 looke1 looke 
good people where that vile             
whooremaster ,iohn a ,borhead comes in  
piping hot from ,clayphams wife4  ,whose
 verie sight put him so cleane besides  
himselfe1 that he could  neyther goe    
forward nor backward1 but stil repeated1
 ,iohn a ,borhead1  ,iohn a ,borhead1   
that vild whooremaister ,iohn a         
,borhead3 to whom with the  ,father1 the
 ,sonne1 and the holy ,ghost1 be al     
honor and praise both now  and for euer4
 ,ah hah maister ,martine1 what get you 
nowe by your red  cap8 ,whether was     
,clayphams wife or ,iohn a ,borhead more
 in fault1 for  marring this good       
sermon4 ,if ,i4 a ,borhead1 then is it  
not best for him  to come in my brother 
,wig4 waie1 least he stabbe him1 as hee 

did the  ,drumme once for playing after 
seruice4 ,how euer it was1 may it please
 you  ,lordes of the spiritualtie1 in   
consideration of these laudible         
premises1  to sende him home to his     
charge1 that hee may once more preache  
in the  yewe tree4 ,my brother ,vd4 of  
,kingston thinkes ,ile spare him for his
  wiues sake1 that is reported to be as 
good a wench as euer playde her  prises 
at ,pancredge1 although she is not      
altogether such a gyantesse1  as my     
brother ,wig4 female1 but forma         
fragulis1 and ,ale is not worth  a      
button1 if it be too stale4 ,wherefore  
prepare you good neighbour ,v4  to      
vnder-goe the crosse of persecution4    
,martine hath vaunted you to  be a      
venterous knight1 and ,i doe meane to   
breake a launce with you1 ere  you and  
,i part4 ,wherfore what saie you nowe to
 the matter1 is ,christ  descended of   
bastardisme or no1 as you gaue out in   
the pulpyt8 ,would you  not haue your   
tongue cut out for your blasphemie if   

you wer wel serued8  ,are you a notable 
preacher of the word of ,god1 and a     
vehement reprouer of  sin1 that thus    
seeke to discredit the fleshly descent  
of our ,sauiour1 ,i  thought you such   
another1 when ,i first sawe you         
emblazoned in ,martins  bookes4 ,tis you
 that are so holy1 that you wil not     
forsooth be seene  to handle anie monie1
 nor take golde though it shoulde filch 
it selfe  into your purse1 but if ,god  
moued the heartes of anie of your       
brethren  or sistren in the ,lord1 to   
bring in pots1 beds or houshold stuffe  
into  your house1 you would go out of   
doores of purpose whiles it was brought 
in1 and then if anie man aske you1 how  
you come so well storde1 your  answere  
is that you know not how1 but only by   
the prouidence of ,god4 ,i  must        
belabour you when all is done1 for your 
backbiting and slandering  of your      
honest neighbours1 and open inueighing  
against the established  gouernment in  
your sermons4 ,helpe him ,martin1 or    

else his vpbraided  absurdities will    
make thee repent that euer thou belyedst
 or disgracedst  ,hone1 ,cottington or  
,chatfield in his cause4 ,may it please 
you  therefore that are in authoritie1  
considering how reuerently hee hath     
abused ,christs birthright1 to restore  
him to preach that the blockes and      
stones of ,kingstone1 do not crie out   
against you4 ,i followe the riuers  of  
folly1 whiles the fountaines of         
infection do propagate their poison4    
,martin all this while thinkes himself  
in league with obscuritie1  whiles      
,phebus the discouerer of ,mars and     
,venus adultery1 hath streamed  his     
bright day light into the net where he  
daunceth4 ,blush squint-eied  caitife1  
since thy couert no more wil contain    
thee4 ,clum te contegit  non habes      
vrnam4 ,therfore let al posteritie that 
shall heare of his  knauerie1 attend the
 discouery which now ,i will make of his
 villanie4  ,pen4 ,i4 ,pen4 welch ,pen4 
,pen4 the ,protestationer1              

,demonstrationer1  ,supplicationer1     
,appellationer1 ,pen4 the father1 ,pen4 
the sonne1 ,pen4  ,martin ,iunior1      
,martin ,martinus1 ,pen4 the scholler of
 ,oxford to his  friend in ,cambridge1  
,pen4 totum in toto1 et totum in        
qualibet parte1  was somtimes 7if ,i be 
not deceiued7 a scholler of that house  
in ,cambridge  whereof ,d4 ,per4 was    
maister4 ,where1 what his estimation    
was1 the scorn  wherin he liued can best
 relate4 ,for the constitution of his   
bodie1 it  was so cleane contrarie to   
all phisiognomie of fame1 that a man    
wold haue  iudged by his face1 ,god and 
nature deuising our disgrace1 had       
enclosde  a close stoole in skinne1 and 
set a serpentine soule1 like a          
counterfet  diamond1 more deepe in dong4
 ,neither was this monster of ,cracouia 
vnmarkt  from his bastardisme to        
mischiefe3 but as he was begotten in    
adultery  and conceiued in the heate of 
lust1 so was he brought into the world  
on a tempestuous daie1 and borne in that

 houre when all planets wer  opposite4  
,predestination y foresaw how crooked he
 should proue in his  waies1 enioyned   
incest to spawne him splay-footed4      
,eternitie1 that knew  how aukward he   
shoulde looke to all honesty1 consulted 
with ,conception  to make him           
squint-eied1 and the deuill that        
discouered by the heauens  disposition  
on his birth-day1 how great a lim of his
 kingdom was comming  into the world1   
prouided a rustie superficies wherinto  
wrapt him1 as  soone as euer he was     
separated from his mothers wombe3 in    
euerie part  whereof these words of     
blessing were most artificially         
engrauen1 ,crine  ruber1 niger ore1     
breuis pede1 lumine lustus4 ,to leaue   
his natiuitie  to the ,church porch1    
where the parish found him1 and come to 
his riper  yeres1 that now had learnd   
,puerilis1 of the poore mans boy1 and   
nere  as pretily entred in ,aue ,marie  
,english1 as any parish clarke in those 
parts4 ,i am to tel you how laudibly he 

behaued himselfe in ,peterhouse1  during
 the time of his subsistership4 ,first  
therfore he began with his  religion at 
his first comming thether1 ,hoc scitote 
viri1 that he was  as arrant a papist as
 euer came out of ,wales4 ,i tell you   
,i4 a ,p4 in  those daies1 would haue   
run a false gallop ouer his beades with 
anie  man in ,england1 and helpt the    
,priest for a shift to saie ,masse at   
high  midnight1 which if need were1 ,i  
doubt not but he would do at this houre4
  ,it was not for nothing my masters1   
that he so be-baited his betters1  for  
shewing the people the relique of our   
,ladies smock in his sermon1  and open  
detecting of all their other blind      
superstition4 ,say what you  will1 he is
 a close lad1 and can carrie a ring in  
his mouth1 though all  the world see it 
not3 what though hee now dissemble with 
the time1 and  disguise his ,spanish    
heart in a ,precisians habit4 ,may not  
he hereafter  proue a necessarie mber in
 conspiracies common wealth1 and        

aduantage the  holy league as much in   
this meanes of sedition1 as all ,philips
 power  by inuasion4 ,simple ,english   
men1 that cannot see into pollicie      
before  it supprise your peace1 nor     
interrupt the ambition of trechery1     
before  it hath besieged your           
prosperitie4 ,doe you beholde whiles    
innouations  bud1 and do not you feare  
lest your children and family be        
poisoned  with the fruit4 ,the          
,scythians are barbarous1 yet more      
fore-seeing then  you1 who so detested  
al forren innouations1 tding to the     
derogation of  theyr ancient customes1  
that they kild ,anacharsis for no other 
cause1  but for y he performed the      
rights of ,sibil after the manner of the
  ,grecians4 ,what should ,i vpbraide   
your simplicitie with the ,epidaurians  
prouident subtiltie1 who fearing least  
their ,countrie men shoulde attract     
innouations from other nations1 and     
especially from their riotous  neighbors
 the ,illirians1 interdicted theyr      

merchants from al trafick with  them1 or
 trauaile vnto them1 but least they     
should be vtterly destitute  of their   
commodities1 they chose a graue man     
amongst them1 knowen to be  of good     
gouernment and reputation1 who dealt    
continually for the whole  ,countrie in 
the waie of exchange1 and meruailously  
augmented their wealth  by the reuerence
 of his wisedome4 ,but you fond men1 as 
in garments so in  gouernment           
continually affecting new fashions1     
thinke no man can be saued  y hath not  
bin at ,geneua4 ,your beleefe forsooth  
must be of that ,scottish  kinde1 and   
your ,bibles of the primitiue print1    
else your consciences ,god  wot1 are not
 of the cannonical cut1 nor your        
opinions of the ,apostles  stamp4 ,pen4 
with ,pan1 hath contended with ,appollo1
 and you lyke  ,midasses1 haue          
ouerprised his musick4 ,good ,god1 y a  
,welch harpe should  inchant so many    
,english harts to their confusi1        
especially hauing nere a  string        

belonging to it1 but a treble4 ,had a   
syren sung1 and ,i drownd in  attending 
her descante4 ,i would haue bequeathed  
my bane to her beautie1  but when       
,cerberus shall barke and ,i turne back 
to listen1 th let me  perish without    
pittie1 in the delight of my liuing     
destruction4 ,deceit  hath tooke vp his 
seat in a dunce1 and you thinke him a   
saint1 because he  comes not in the     
shape of a deuil4 ,we know ,m4 ,pen4    
intus et in cute1  first for a papist1  
then for a ,brownist1 next for an       
,anabaptist1 and last  for y blasphemous
 ,martin1 whose spirite is the concrete 
compound of  all these vnpardonable     
heresies4 ,but had not the frantike     
practise of his  youth throughly founded
 his confirmed age in this furie1 ,i    
woulde haue  imagined his vpstart spite1
 a wder aboue usual speech1 whereas now 
the  coniectures drawen from his        
cradles1 detract fr his mallice all     
maruels4  ,for whiles hee was yet a     
fresh man in ,peterhouse1 and had scarce

 tasted1  as we say1 of ,setons         
modalibus1 he began to affect factions  
in art1  and shew himselfe openly a     
studious disgracer of antiquitie4 ,who  
then  such an vnnatural enemie to       
,aristotle1 or such a new-fgled friend  
vnto  ,ramus4 ,this one thing ,i am sure
 of1 hee neuer went for other then an   
asse1 amongst his companions and        
equalles1 yet such a mutinous block-head
  was he alwaies accounted1 that through
 town and ,colledge he was cmonly       
called the seditious dunce4 ,for one    
while he would be libelling against     
,arist4 and all his followers he knew1  
another while hee would all to  be-rime 
,doctour ,perne1 for his new statutes1  
and make a by-word of  his bald pate1   
yea had the ,dean1 ,president1 or any   
other officer neuer  so litle angerd    
him1 they were sure ere the weeke went  
about to haue  hard of it1 in some      
libell or other4 ,this humour helde him 
at that time1  when1 by conuersing with 
,french men neare ,christes ,colledge1  

of a ,papist  hee became a ,brownist1   
how afterwards from a ,brownist hee fell
 to bee  an ,anabaptist1 ,i referre it  
to those that knewe his after behauiour 
in  ,oxford4 ,but for his last discent1 
a malo in peius from an ,anabaptist  to 
be that infamous ,martin1 impute it to  
the age of his heresies1  that are now  
in there ,harvest4 ,neither would ,i    
haue you thinke there  was no more      
heades in it then his owne1 ,for ,i can 
assure you to the  contrary1 that moste 
of the ,puritane preachers in           
,northampton shire1  ,warwick shire1    
,sufolke and ,northffolke1 haue eyther  
brought stone1 strawe  or morter to the 
building of this ,martin4 ,only ,pen4   
found nothing  but ry1 which the last   
part of his name1 affordeth             
sufficiently1 you  may see what it is   
for a nest of hornets to hiue together1 
oh they wil  make braue combes to choake
 bees withal1 if they be let alone but  
one  quarter1 not so much as ,t4 ,c4    
himselfe1 but will haue the helpe of his

  fellow ,brethren1 if he hath any thing
 to write against ,bishops1 were  not al
 the elected in ,cambridge1 assembled   
about the shaping of the  confutation of
 the ,remish ,testament1 ,o so deuoutly 
they met euery ,friday  at ,saint       
,laurence his ,monastery1 wher the      
counsails and fathers1 were  distributed
 amongst seueral companies1 and euery   
one of the reformed  society sent there 
combined quotations weeke by weeke in a 
,capcase1 to  my brother ,thomas1 yet   
wandring beyond sea1 such a ,chaos of   
common  places1 no apothegmatical       
,lycosthenes euer conceited4 ,bishops   
were the  smallest bugs1 that were aimed
 at in this extraordinary beneuolence1  
,god shield1 the court haue escapt their
 collectis4 ,some thing it would  proue 
in the end if it wer published1 that is 
pouldred with the brains  of so many    
,puritan springols1 and polluted with   
the pains of such an  infinite number of
 ,asses4 ,much good do it you ,m4       
,martin1 how like  you my stile1 am not 

,i old ,ille ego qui quondam at y       
besleeuing of  a sichophant4 ,alas poore
 idiot1 thou thinkest no man can write  
but thy  selfe1 or frame his pen to     
delight1 except he straine curtesie with
 one  of thy ,northren figures1 but if  
authority do not moderate1 the fiery    
feruence of my enflamed zeale1 ile      
assaile thee from terme to terme  with  
,archilochus1 in such a compleat armour 
of ,iambicks1 as the very  reflexcye of 
my fury1 shall make thee driue thy      
father before thee to the  gallows1 for 
begetting thee in such a bloody houre4  
,o ,god that we two  might bee permitted
 but one quarter1 to try it out by the  
teeth for the  best benefice in         
,england1 then would ,i distill my wit  
into incke1 and my  soule into          
argumentes1 but ,i would driue this     
,danus from his dunghill1  and make him 
faune like a dog for fauour at the      
magistrates feete4 ,but it  is our      
,english policy to aduantage our enemies
 by delaies1 and resist a  multitude    

with a fewe1 which makes sediton seede  
before the haruesters of  our souls     
suppose it in the blade3 it is not the  
spirite of mildenesse  y must moderat   
the hart of folly1 dogs must be beaten  
with staues1 and  stuborn slaues        
ctrolled with stripes4 ,authority best  
knows how to diet  these bedlamites1    
although ,segnior ,penry in his last    
waste paper hath  subscribed our        
magistrats infants4 ,repent1 repent thou
 runnagate lozill1  and play not the    
,seminary any longer in corners1 least  
thy chiefest  benefactors forsake thee1 
and recouer the pouerty of their fines1 
by  bringing the pursiuants to thy      
forme4 ,i heare some vnderhande         
whisperers1  and greeneheaded nouices   
exclaime against our ,bishops1 for not  
granting  thee disputation4 ,alas alas  
brother ,martin it may not be3 for thou 
art  known to be such a stale hackster1 
with thy welch hooke1 that no honest    
man wil debase himselfe in buckling with
 such a braggar4 ,but suppose we  should

 send some ,crepundio forth our schools 
to beat thee about the eares  with ergo4
 ,where should this sillogistica        
concertatio be solemnized3  what in our 
,vniuersity schooles at ,oxford1 or in  
puluere ,philosophico  at ,cambridge4   
,no they were erected in time of        
,popery1 and must be new  built againe  
before they can giue any accesse to his 
arguments4 ,truly ,i  am afraide y this 
,generall counsaile1 must be holden at  
,geneua1 when al  is done1 for ,i know  
no place in ,england holy inough for    
their turne1  except it be some barne or
 out-house about ,bury1 or some odde    
blind  cottage in the hart of ,warwicke 
shire1 and thither peraduenture1 these  
good honest opponents would repaire     
without grudging4 ,prouided alwaies     
that they haue ther horse-hire and other
 charges allowed them out of the  poor  
mans box1 or els it is no bargain4 ,all 
this fadges wel yet1 if we  had once    
determined who shold be father of the   
act4 ,why what a question  is that1 when

 we haue so many persecuted elders      
abroad4 ,the blinde1 the  halt1 or the  
lame1 or any serues the turn with them1 
so he hath not  on a cloak with sleues1 
or a cap of the vniuersity cut4 ,imagin 
that  place to be furnished1 where shall
 we finde moderators1 that may deale    
indifferently twixt both parts4         
,machiuell is dead many a yeare agoe1   
or els he had bene a fit man for this   
may-game1 therefore whom shal we  haue  
now1 since it must be neither yours nor 
ours4 ,some vpstart countrey            
,gentleman1 that hath vndone all his    
tenants by oppression1 euen such a  one 
as ,scar4 of ,warwicke shire1 that being
 a noted ,martinist1 be  frinded his    
poor coppi-holder ,criar1 and turnd him 
out of all that ere  he had very        
orderly4 ,how thinke you my lay         
brethren8 is not here a trim            
conuocation towards4 ,but mark the end  
of it1 and then you may haps see  odde  
buffeting with the buttond bookes1 and  
battring down of bishopricks4  ,giles of

 ,sidborough wil off his gown at least1 
and make demonstrations  of ,logique    
with his fists like ,zeno1 what though  
he be low and cannot  reach so hie as an
 ,archbishop1 may not he std like a     
iackanapes on his  wiues shoulders1 and 
scold for the best game with all that   
come4 ,he is  sauing a reuerence a      
spritish disputer1 and a pestilent felow
 at an  vnperfect sillogisme4 ,nay mark 
me well1 and take me at my words1 he    
shal speake false ,latine1 forge a text1
 abuse a ,bishop1 or make a lie of      
reuelation for more then ,i speak off   
with any man in ,engld4 ,neither do  ,i 
flatter him herin for he hears me not1  
if ,i did1 it were no matter1           
considering that virtus laudata crescit4
    ,from iest to ernest1 ,i appeale to 
you ,gentlemen1 how ridiculous in       
pollicy this disputation would proue if 
it were granted4 ,first for  there      
,bibles1 the touchstone of all          
controuersies1 they must bee of  their  
fouorites translation1 or els they will 

deny there authority  as friuolous4     
,admit they go to the original 7which   
but few of them  vnderstand7 they wil   
haue euery man his sundry               
interpretation4 ,let our  deuines       
alledge any text1 they will expound it  
as they list1 say the  fathers or other 
auncient writers what they will4 ,for   
such is the growth  of their arrogancy1 
that they are not ashamed to compare    
themselus with  ,ierome or ,austen1 and 
in their tedious sermons preach against 
them as  prophane4 ,if this th bee any  
betraying of the wretchednesse of our   
cause  7as they call it7 not to dispute 
with them that deny all principles1  not
 to contend with th that wilbe tride by 
none but themselus1 ,i refer  it to all 
considerate iudgementes1 that haue no   
more experice in the  actions of peace  
then a reasonable soule may afford4 ,the
 more pacified  sort of our ,puritans1  
would needs perswade the world1 that it 
is nought  but a learned ministry which 
their chpion ,martin endeuors3 were it  

no  otherwise his pardon were easely    
sealed1 but those that know the treas   
of his books1 can report of his mallice 
against ,bishops4 ,one thing ,i am      
perswaded1 that he neither respects the 
propagation of the ,gospel1 nor  the    
prosperity of the ,church1 but only the 
benefite that may fall to him  and his  
boulsterers1 by the distribution of     
,bishoprickes4 ,beshrewe mee  but those 
,church-liuings would come well to      
decayed courtiers4 ,o howe  meerilye the
 ,dice would runne1 if our lustye laddes
 might goe to hazard  for halfe a dozen 
of these ,dioseses4 ,not a page but     
woulde haue a  flinge at some or other  
impropriation or personage3 and in      
conclusion1  those liuings which now    
maintaine so many schollers and         
students1 would  in two or three yeares 
be all spent in a ,tauerne amongst a    
consort of  queanes and fidlers1 that   
might carouse on their wine-bench to the
  confusion of religion4 ,well1 to      
proceede in this text of reformation3   

is not this thy meaning ,martin1 that   
thou wouldest haue two and  fiftie      
thousand ,pastors1 for two and fiftie   
thousand ,parish churches  in ,england  
and ,wales4 ,if thou saiest the word1 we
 will haue a place in  both             
,vniuersities1 begin in ,oxford first   
with the fresh-men1 and so go  vp to the
 heades of the ,vniuersitie1 and then   
count how many thou canst  make4 ,our   
,beadles that know the number best1     
would needes perswade vs1  that of all  
sortes1 there is not full three         
thousand3 in ,cambridge they  say there 
is not so many by a thousand1 then call 
thy wits together1 and  imagin with thy 
selfe1 out of these three thousand1 and 
two thousand of  all gatherings1 how    
many good preachers may be mustered1    
some foure  hundreth as ,i gesse1       
peraduenture thou maist rebate them to  
some fiftie  or threescore1 because     
there is no more open-mouthes of thy    
profession  in both ,vniuersities3 ,how 
farre this fiftie is from fiftie        

thousand1  a farthing worth of          
,arithmetike will teach you3 where wilt 
thou haue  then a competent number to   
fill vp those defects of dum ministers3 
inspiration ,i perceiue must helpe to   
patch vp your knauerie1 and then        
welfare the cobler of ,norwitch1 that   
being one morning somthing earelie  at  
,saint ,androwes1 and the ,preacher not 
come before the ,psalme was ended1      
stept vp into the pulpet verie deuoutly1
 and made me a good thriftie            
exhortation in the praise of plaine     
dealing4 ,if this bee not true1 aske    
the ,maior that committed him to prison 
for his labour4 ,such another  ,doctour 
would he proue1 that standing in        
election for a liuing that was  then in 
her ,maiesties bestowing1 came to be    
examined by men of grauitie  in the     
circumstance of his sufficiencie1 who   
discending eft soones into  his         
vnschooled simplicitie1 gaue him this   
litle ,english to be made in  ,latin4   
,there be three ,creedes1 the ,nycen    

,creede1 ,athanatius ,creede1  and the  
,apostles ,creede1 all which ought to be
 belieued vpon paine of  damnation4 ,the
 good simple superintendant1 that saw   
himselfe so hardly  beset1 craued       
respite to compasse this vulgar1 which  
graunted1 after some  deliberation he   
began thus to go forward1 8,tria sunt   
,creda1 vnum ,niceni1  alterum          
,athanasii1 tertium ,apostolorum1 qu    
omnes debent esse creditum1  sub pna    
condemnationis40 ,i marrie ,sir1 here is
 apeece of scholershippe  of the new    
cut1 which for the goodnesse of the     
,latin might haue borne a  part in the  
,pewteres paggeant4 ,i keepe a register 
of ten thousand such  knacks4 ,why1     
there is not a ,presician in ,england   
that hath abused arte1  or mistoken a   
metaphor but ,i haue his name in blacke 
and white1 what say  you to that zealous
 sheepebyter of your owne edition in    
,cambridge1 that  saide the wicked had a
 scabbe1 a braune1 and a crust on their 
conscience1  being so full of their     

wilie gilies1 that we that are the true 
children  of ,god can not tell how to   
concerne them3 or was not hee a sound   
carde1  that talking of the maiestie and
 authoritie of the scriptures1 said they
  were the sweete meates of ,saintes1   
the houshold stuffe of heauen1 and  the 
home spunne cloth of the ,lords own     
loombes1 being deliuered from the       
stonebow of his mouth1 when he appeared 
in glory on mount ,sinay3 ,but this  is 
nothing to the good sport of that is    
behinde4 ,what1 ,i must tell you  of a  
fellow that trolles in his rethorike    
like ,martin in his riddles4  ,this     
hors-holy father preaching on a time in 
,saint ,maries at ,oxford1  came off    
with this mannerly comparison3 ,there is
 an vglie and monstrous  beast in our   
tongue called a hogge1 and this vgly and
 monstrous beast in  boistrous and      
tempesteous weather lifts vp his snoute 
into the ayre1 and  cryes wrough1       
wrough3 euen so 7deare people7 the      
children of ,god in the  troublesome    

time of temptations1 cry1 ,our helpe is 
in the name of the  ,lord4 ,such another
 woodcocke was he of ,yarmouth1 that    
said openly in the  pulpet1 whosoeuer   
weares a vayle1 is an whore without     
exception1 and on  an other time1 two   
women comming to be churched1 whereof   
the one wore a  vaile1 the other went   
without4 ,he began his thankesgiuing in 
this forme3  ,let vs giue ,god thankes  
for the safe deliuery of one of our     
sisters1 for  the other let vs not giue 
,god thankes1 for she is a straunger1   
and we  haue nothing to doe with her1 ,i
 take her to be ,dinah the harlot1 that 
sat by the high way side1 for she hath a
 vayle ouer her face4 ,in the next      
place to him1 shall he be put that      
railing on the ,papists in his ,sermon1 
alledged this argument to confute their 
religion1 ,nay 7saith he7 you may       
gather what a wicked and spotted        
religion this papistrie is1 for ,campion
  himselfe that was accounted their     
chiefest piller1 was reported to haue   

had the poxe4 ,i haue another in my     
tables1 that handling that place of     
,iosua where ,rahab entertained his     
spies1 would needes conclude all        
,inkeepers to be harlots1 because ,rahab
 the harlot was an ,inkeeper4 ,i  shall 
run my penne out of breath1 if ,i       
articulate all the examples of  their   
absurdeties that ,i could4 ,haue not    
,trinitie ,hall men in ,cambridge  a    
preaching brother in ,bury yet in sute1 
for saying all ciuillians were  papists4
 ,to let him passe for a patch1 that    
being maister of none of the  meanest   
,colledges in ,cambridge1 and by the oth
 of his admission1 bound  to take no    
money for preferments1 made answere to  
one that offered him  fortie markes to  
make his sonne fellow3 ,god forbid ,i   
should take any  money for it is against
 my oth1 but if you will giue me it in  
plate1 ,ile  pleasure him in what ,i    
may4 ,this is the dreamer if you be     
aduised1 that  is indebted aboue two    
thousand houres to the ,vniuersitie1    

which he hath  borrowed by three and    
foure at a time vpon seuerall sundayes  
preaching  as it came to his course3 it 
is a shame for him1 that he doth not pay
  them1 professing such puritie as he   
doth4 ,martin1 thou seest ,i come  not  
abruptly to thee like a rednosde        
ieaster1 that in the pride of his       
pottle-pots curries ouer a reuelling    
riffe raffe of ,tapsterly tauntes1  and 
course hempen quippes1 such as our      
brokerly wits doe filsh out of  ,bull   
the ,hangmans budget1 but ,i speake     
plaine ,english1 and call thee a  knaue 
in thine owne language4 ,all the        
generation of you are ,hipocrites  and  
belli-gods1 that deuoure as much good   
meat in one of your brotherly  loue     
meetings1 as would wel-nye victuall the 
,queenes ships a whole  moneth4 ,it is a
 shame for you to exclame so against    
,cardes1 and play  thus vnreasonably at 
,maw as you do4 ,gaffe ,martin1 doe you 
remember  whom you vpbraided by         
,primero8 well let not me take you at   

,noddy anie  more1 least ,i present you 
to the parish for a gamster1 this the   
ninth  set that you haue lost1 and yet  
you will not leaue off4 ,beware ,anthony
  ,munday be not euen with you for      
calling him ,iudas1 and lay open your   
false carding to the stage of all mens  
scorne4 ,i maruell ,pasquill comes  not 
away with his legends1 considering that 
the date of his promise is  more then   
expired4 ,it seemes he stayes for some  
,saintes that are yet to  suffer1 and   
wants none but ,martin to make vp his   
legend of ,martyres1  if it be so ,i    
woulde thou wouldest come aloft quickly1
 that we might  haue this good sport    
altogether1 and not liue euer in        
expectation of  that which is not4 ,o ,i
 could furnish him to the proofe with   
such a  packet of male and female       
professors1 as the world might not      
patterne4  ,a good old dunstable doctor 
here in ,london1 should be the formost  
of  them1 that saide his wife was as    
good as our ,ladie3 and another time    

quarrelling with one of his neighbours  
that was a sadler1 about setting  vp of 
the ,organs1 in a good zeale he lift vp 
his fist1 and stroke out  two of his    
fore teeth1 like a right man of peace3  
where haue you lived  my brethren1 that 
you haue not heard of that learned      
,presbiter1 that  talking how ,adam fell
 by eating of the ,apple1 discourst     
thus3 ,adam  eate the ,apple and gaue it
 to his wife1 whereby is to be noted    
that the  man eate and the woman eate1  
the man eate1 but how1 a snap and away3 
the  woman eat1 but how1 she laide her  
thumbe on the stalke1 and her finger  on
 the coare and bitte it ouerthwart1 in  
which byting it ouerthwart1 she  broke  
all the commaundements1 insomuch as     
vnder ten greene spots the ten          
cmmandments in euery ,apple are         
comprised3 and besides that corrupted   
her  fiue senses4 ,from whence wee may  
gather this obseruation1 that a woman   
alwaies eates an ,apple ouerthwart4     
,why1 this is sound diuinitie1 and apt  

for to edify1 ,sed abeundum est mihi1   
and from the ,cleargie must ,i  leape to
 the ,laytie4 ,wherefore ,god euen good 
man ,dauy of ,canterbury1  and better   
lucke betide thee and thy limbes1 then  
when thou dauncedst a  whole sunday at a
 wedding1 and afterwardes repenting they
 selfe of thy  prophane agilitie1 thou  
entredst into a more serious meditation 
against  what table thou hadst sinned1  
or what part was the principall in this 
antike iniquitie4 ,the eyes they were   
the formost in this enditement1 but  the
 legs1 7,o those leude legs17 they      
brought him thither1 they kept him      
there1 they leapt1 they daunced1 and ,i 
leualted to the ,vials of vanitie3      
wherefore1 what didst thou but like a   
true christian chastised them           
accordingly4 ,the scripture saith1 if   
thine eye offend thee1 plucke it  out1  
,dauy saith1 my hose and shoes haue     
offended mee1 therefore will ,i  plucke 
them off4 ,this text thus applyed1 off  
went the wollen stockings  with a trice1

 and they with the good neates leather  
shoes were cast both  into the bottom of
 a well4 ,the sinners thus punished1 and
 all parties  pleased1 home went the    
pilgrim ,dauy barefoote and barelegge4  
,and now  since wind and tide serues1   
now ,i care not if ,i cut ouer to       
,ipswitch3  there is a ,cowdresser there
 that ,i am sure will entertaine me if  
she be  not dead1 great ,iane of        
,ipswitch they call her1 one that hath  
beene  a tender mother to many a        
,martinist in her time1 and hath a very 
good  insight in a canne of strong wine4
 ,a good vertuous ,matrone is she and a 
wise1 hauing no fault but this1 that she
 will be drunke once a day1 and  then   
she lyes her downe on her bedde1 and    
cryes1 ,o my ,god1 my ,god1 thou        
knowest ,i am drunke1 and why ,i should 
offend thee my ,god by spuing thus1  as 
,i do4 ,i haue not beene in ,essex yet1 
but ,ile set in my staffe there as  ,i  
go home1 for ,i haue a petition for my  
brother that made the ,sermon of        

,repentance to deliuer vp for me to the 
,councell3 but it must not be such  a   
one as he deliuered for him selfe to my 
,lord ,treasurer1 beginning with  ,o    
sweet ,margery1 could thy eyes see so   
fare1 thy hands feele so farre1  or thy 
eares heare so farre c4 for then euerie 
seruing man will mocke  vs1 but it must 
be of another tune1 with most pitifully 
complaining1 that  a man can not call an
 ,asse1 asse1 but he shall be had coram 
nobis4 ,in  this vaine enough1 because  
actions of the case are chargeable1 and 
,guilde  men vncharitable4 ,if the dogge
 ,martin barke againe1 ,ile hold him    
tugge  for two or three courses1 and    
then beware my blacke booke you were    
best1  for ,i haue not halfe emboweld my
 register4 ,amend1 amend1 and glorie no 
more in your hipocrisie1 least your     
pride and vaine glory betray our        
prosperitie to our enimies1 and procure 
the ,lords vengeance to dwell in  the   
gates of our citie4 ,the simple are     
abused1 the ignorant deluded1 and  ,gods

 truth most pitifully peruerted1 and    
thou art that most wretched  seducer1   
that vnder wolues raiment deuourest     
widowes houses4 ,visions are  ceast1 and
 all extraordinarie reuelation ended1   
although a good fellow  in ,cambridge1  
hearing all thinges might be obtained by
 prayer1 prayed  two dayes and two      
nightes for visions3 wherefore broach no
 more heresies  vnder colour of         
inspiration3 if thou doest1 thou art    
like to heare of me  by the next        
,carrier4 ,and so bon nute to your      
,noddishippe4                ,yours to  
command as your owne              for   
two or three cudgellings at all times4  
,cutbert ,curriknaue the yonger4        
,,footnotes      #a ,hug4 lib4 de duob4 
abusio4    #b ,greg4 lib4 #h4    #c     
,greg4 lib4 mor4    #d ,ber4 #b4 ser4   
resur4    #e ,ierome super ,oseam4    #f
 ,greg4 #ae4          ,,notes4          
,,page #i1 line #bh4 induments from     
induo1 ,latin1 to put on2 cover over4   
,the word1 as a noun1 does not occur in 

,todd's ,johnson nor in ,nares4         
8,diana's shape and habit them          
indued40--,sandys' ,ovid1 b4 ii4        
8,one first matter all      ,indu'd with
 various forms40--,milton1 ,par4 ,lost4 
,p4 #aa1 l4 #f4 unuenidall sinnes       
,unvenial8 it seems used in             
contradistinction to venial4    ,p4 #aa1
 l4 #h4 despairing protestations ,this  
is an allusion to 8,the  ,protestatyon  
of ,martin ,mar-,prelat1 wherein        
notwithstanding the surprizing  of the  
printer1 he maketh it known vnto the    
world that he feareth1  neither proud   
priest1 ,antichristian pope1 tiranous   
prellate1 nor godlesse  catercap40      
,p4 #ab1 l4 #bh4 burlibond ,todd1 in his
 edition of ,johnson1 has adduced  one  
illustration of the word burly1 which   
approximates to the meaning  here1 that 
of loud1 boisterous2 derived1 as he     
supposes from borlen1  ,teut41 to make a
 noise4 ,though neither in ,nares nor   
,todd1 it will be  found in ,nash's     
,pierce ,penniless ,reprint1 ,shaksp4   

,soc41 p4 #be3 8,the  most grosse and   
senseless proud dolts are the ,danes1   
who stand so much  vpon their vnweldie  
burlibound souldiery1 that they account 
of no man  that hath not a battle-axe at
 his girdle to hough dogs with1 or      
weares  not a cock's fether in a thrumb 
hat like a caualier3 briefly1 he is the 
best foole bragart under heaven40    ,p4
 #ac1 l4 #be4 hodie-peeles ,nash1 in his
 ,anatomie of ,absurdities1  uses the   
word hoddy-peke1 there implying cuckold1
 which is the meaning  it bears in this 
place4    8,who under her husband's that
 hoddy-peke's nose must have all the    
distilling dew of his delicate rose40   
,p4 #ad1 l4 #b4 true-pennie ,see the    
,notes to the ,reprint of 8,hay any     
,worke for ,cooper10 p4 #gi4    ,p4 #ad1
 l4 #g4 ,buls slicing4 ,bull was the    
name of the common hangman2 he  is      
quoted some two or three times in 8,pap 
with a ,hatchet10 and in many of  the   
,dramas of the time4    ,p4 #ae1 l4 #ba4
 ,old ,martin of ,england4 ,an allusion 

to the 8,iust censure  and reproofe of  
,martin ,iunior1 by his reuerend and    
elder brother ,martin  ,senior40    ,p4 
#af1 l4 #ad4 dudgen distinction4 ,i am  
unable to explain this4    ,p4 #af1 last
 line4 bibble-babble4 ,idle talk4       
8,malvolio1 ,malvolio1 thy wits the     
heaven restore6 endeavour thyself to    
sleep1 leave thy vain bibble            
babble40--,shakspeare1 ,twelfth ,night4 
,p4 #ag1 l4 #a4 gibbrige ,gibberish4    
,p4 #ag1 l4 #ai4 ,cli4 the ,cobler1 c4  
,cliffe1 ,newman1 ,lawson4    ,p4 #bb1  
l4 #be4 ,will ,tong4 ,i cannot give any 
account of this worthy1  unless ,will4  
,kempe1 who succeeded the celebrated    
,tarlton1 is meant4  ,elderton's name is
 well known1 his rimes and ballets are  
the subject  of frequent allusion in the
 dramas and pamphlets of the time4 ,see 
8,pap  with a ,hatchet10 ,reprint1 p4   
#ad4 ,harvey's 8,pierce's               
,supererogation40  ,reprint1 p4 #aha4   
,p4 #bc1 l4 #be4 his ,welchnes4 ,an     
allusion to ,penry4    ,p4 #bd1 l4 #d4  

,hodgkins1 ,tomlins and ,sims4          
,hodgkins1 and his two men1  ,tomlyn and
 ,symms1 who were employed to print the 
,mar-,prelate ,tracts  after            
,waldegrave's press had been broken up1 
were seized at ,manchester  in printing 
8,more work for the ,cooper40 ,their    
examination will be found  in ,strype's 
,annals1 vii4 #fjb-e4--,see also much   
information in ,sutcliffe's  ,answer to 
,job ,throckmorton1 p4 #gb1 #dto1 #aeie4
    ,p4 #be1 l4 #h4 ,bumfeging4 i4 e4   
belabouring4 ,the word does not occur   
in ,nares4 ,in 8,hay any ,worke for     
,cooper10 ,martin says1 8,for ise so    
bumfeg  the ,cooper10 c4 ,reprint1 p4   
#bd4    ,p4 #bf1 l4 #e4 the aged        
champion of ,warwicke4 i4 e4 ,thomas    
,cartwright4    ,p4 #bf1 l4 #h4 ,phi4   
,stu4 ,philip ,stubbes1 the             
brother-in-law of  ,cartwright4 ,his    
8,anatomy of ,abuses10 was printed in   
#aehi4    ,p4 #ca1 l4 #bd4 ribrost4 ,to 
belabour1 to beat soundly4    8,i have  
been pinched in flesh1 and well         

ribroasted under my former  masters2 but
 ,i'm in now for skin and               
all40--,l',estrange4    ,p4 #ce1 l4 #bf4
 anie more bones4 i4 e4 without scruple4
    8,perjury will easily donne with him
 that hath made no bones of             
murther40--,bp4 ,hall1 ,cases of        
,conscience4    ,p4 #ci1 l4 #f4 ,pen4 c4
 ,nash is evidently mistaken in         
attributing all  the ,mar-,prelate      
,tracts to him4 ,the description which  
follows powerfully  reminds us of       
,nash's characteristic portrait of      
,gabriel ,harvey4    ,p4 #dd1 l4 #b4    
,capcase4 ,a small travelling case1     
according to ,nares1 #gb4    ,p4 #ej1 l4
 #h4 sheepe byter4 ,a petty thief4      
8,there are political sheepbiters as    
well as pastoral1 betrayers of  publick 
trusts as of private40--,l',estrange4   
8,may it please ,gentle ,pierce in the  
divine fury of his ravished spirit1  to 
be graciously good unto his poor        
friends1 who would be somewhat loth  to 
be silly sheep for the wolf1 or other   

sheepbiter40--,g4 ,harvey's  ,pierce's  
,supererogation4    ,p4 #ea1 l4 #bf4    
patch4 i4 e4 a fool4    ,p4 #ea1 l4 #ba4
 ,maw4 ,an old game at cards2 the pun is
 not a bad one4    ,p4 #eb1 l4 #bf4     
,beware ,anthony ,munday4 ,a well known 
writer and  translator of various works4
 ,i have not met with the passage       
alluded to4      ,,the ,,end4           
,,london3 ,,hugh ,,williams1 ,,printer1 
,,ashby-,,street4