,,transcrib]',s ,,notes4 ,unusual &     
inconsi/5t spell+1 gramm>     &         
punctuation h be5 pres]v$4 ,obvi\s      
typographical errors     h be5 sil5tly  
correct$ & ! text has be5 *ang$         
accord+ to ! errata li/$ at ! end ( !   
publi%$ text4     ,und]scores are us$ to
 repres5t italics4 ,small capitals h    
be5 conv]t$ to all capitals4 ,! table ( 
cont5ts 0 add$ by     ! transcrib]4     
,a ,,sket* ,,( ,,! ,,life ,,(           
,,elizabe? ,t4 ,,/one1    ,,& ,,( ,,h]  
,,p]secutions1    ,,) ,,an ,,app5dix    
,,( ,,h]    ,,treatm5t ,,& ,,suff]+s    
,,:ile ,,9 ,,!    ,,*>le/[n ,mc,l,e,a,n 
,,assylum1    ,,:]e ,,%e ,,0 ,,conf9$   
,,"u ,,!    ,,pret5ce ,,( ,,insanity4   
#ahdb3    ,,pr9t$ ,,= ,,! ,,au?or4      
,,table ,,( ,,cont5ts                   
,,page   ,,preface4                     
#c   ,,rem>ks4                          
#cc   ,,clos+ ,,rem>ks ,,to ,,*ri/ians4 
#cg   ,,errata4                         
#db     ,,preface4   ,feel+ t ! public  
is v mu* deceiv$ conc]n+ ! treatm5t &   

situation ( a poor afflict$ class ( !   
human family1 :o are plac$ 9 ! ,mc,lean 
,assylum at ,*>le/[n1 by _! relatives1 &
 are left 9 ! h&s ( /rang]s1 subject$ to
 ! treatm5t ( ^? ^: he>ts are h>d5$ by  
be+ long accu/om$ to human suff]+1 & :o 
are ignorant & unqualifi$1 ,i w expose  
?is matt] to ! public1 9 behalf ( !     
afflict$1 9 connection ) ! awful1 brutal
 outrage t has be5 committ$ ^u me 9     
consequ5ce ( indisposition result+ f h>d
 labor & p]secution1 s ! public may be  
w>n$ aga9/ plac+ _! fri5ds !re1         
especially if !y w\ld n h !m ill-treat$ 
or suff] unnecess>ily4  ,fir/1 ,i %all  
give a %ort sket* ( my life d[n to ! "t 
:5 ,i 0 c>ri$ to ! ,hospital2 !n an     
acc\nt ( ! ,,crime 9 connection ) !     
treatm5t ,i receiv$ !re1 until ,i 0 tak5
 out4 ,i feel t ?is %\ld p>ticul>ly     
int]e/ ! *ri/ian _w2 b :e!r x is believ$
 or n1 ,i am det]m9$ to publi% x1 t ! p 
( ,god may take c>e ( _! own p 9 "t (   
p]secution at ! exp5se ( "o's life1 :e!r
 fa!r1 "m1 bro!r1 or si/] /ep 9 betwe54 

,! unconv]t$ d n und]/& spirituality1   
!re=e a weak1 p]secut$ *ri/ian %\ld n be
 consign$ to _! h&s4 ,if o!rs :o h      
suff]$ ?is cruelty be=e me 7z ,dr4 ,fox 
says t bo? male & female *ri/ians h be5 
de/roy$ !re be=e7 _h publi%$ & expos$ ! 
wick$ crime to ! _w1 ,i might h be5 sav$
 f suff]+ "h & h]eaft]4 ,x is cov]$ up  
"u ! g>b ( d]angem5t1 b ,i am will+ to  
let ! _w "k x1 t o!rs may be sav$ f ^!  
awful outrages ( ! wick$ at ! pres5t    
day4 ,i "k t ! _w 9 g5]al is ignorant ( 
?is crime--( ! fact t ,doctors d possess
 k ( giv+ m$ic9e to take away f a p]son 
! _s ( ,*ri/1--b ,i h suff]$ x4  ,i 0   
born 9 ,we/=d1 ,mass4 ,my fa!r 0 a      
me*anic1 & poor2 my "m be+ (t5 sick1 ) a
 family ( #g boys & #c girls1 we 7 all  
s5t out "y ^u ! _w1 to get our own liv+4
 ,i be+ ! y\nge/ girl1 0 left at home   
alone4 ,! peculi> situation :i* ,i      
su/a9$ 9 ! family1 be+ e>ly dis[n$ by my
 fa!r z 8 lawful *ild1 he be+ intemp]ate
 at ! "t1 may be imag9$4 ,i 0 (t5 !     
object ( 8 wra?1 ?\gh 9 8 sob] h\rs ,i 0

 k9dly treat$ by him1 z he 0 a man (    
t5d] feel+s4 ,b my "m's affections 7    
always ali5at$ f me1 & ,i always felt ! 
want ( a "m's love1 & consequ5tly became
 v unhappy4 ,i det]m9$ to seek my own   
liv+ & %>e ! same fate ( ! re/ ( !      
family by buffet+ a cold unfeel+ _w4    
,at ! age ( fifte5 ,i resort$ to !      
factories 9 ,l[ell1 :]e ,i f\nd         
employm5t & became exp]t at ! bus9ess4  
,kn[+ t ,i _h myself to take c>e ( & no 
"o to dep5d ^u1 ,i 0 ambiti\s & (t5 ask$
 my ov]se] = ! privilege ( t5d+ d\ble   
"w1 :i* 0 (t5 grant$2 & z ,i _h ! means 
( provid+ = my own wants & "s to sp>e1  
,i became re/less & (t5 wi%$ ,i _h !    
means to g to s*ool1 z my "m (t5 told h]
 *ildr5 to get le>n+--x 0 :at ! _w c\ld 
n take f u2 7b ,o1 alas6 m9e has be5    
tak5 f me by m$ic9e1 be+ giv5 to me 9 an
 artful mann] to h>d5 my bra9s1 & ! bra9
 is ! seat ( ! m9d & ! m9d is !         
/ore-h\se ( k7 & ,i felt ! want ( x z ,i
 became advanc$ 9 ye>s & w5t into       
society4 ,i soon began to make          

arrangm5ts to place myself at "s s*ool4 
,i w5t home at ! age ( eighte5 & w5t to 
! ,academy 9 ,we/=d ?ree or f\r mon?s1 &
 !n1 9 ! ye> #ahcd1 ! fir/ ( ,may1 ,i   
/>t$ = ,new ,hampton 9 company ) a "y   
lady f ,bo/on1 %e be+ my only           
acqua9tance4 ,i f\nd ! s*ool v pleasant1
 & ! tea*]s 7 ard5tly pi\s4 ,x 0 n[ t ,i
 felt t ,god _h (t5 call$ aft] me & ,i  
_h refus$ to obey him = my tea*] said   
)\t ! m9d 0 enlight5$ by ! ,_s ( ,*ri/ x
 0 n prep>$ = k4 ,?is increas$ ! c>nal  
/ate ( my he>t aga9/ religion1 = x      
appe>$ to me l fooli%ness1 = !re 0 no?+ 
b ! simple religion ( ,jesus ,*ri/1 no  
disput+1 no sect>ian _s1 & ,i 0 surr\nd$
 by ! pray]s ( my tea*]s & ! pi\s       
s*ol>s4 ,b ,i )/ood all ! entreaties    
?r\gh ! summ] t]m4 ,i 0 det]m9$ n to get
 religion :5 !re 0 mu* said ab\t x1 = ,i
 look$ ^u x z excitem5t1 z _m o!rs      
fooli%ly call x4 ,!re 7 ab\t "o hundr$ &
 five s*ol>s1 & at ! end ( ! t]m all b  
?ree ( u pr(ess$ to h an int]e/ 9 ,*ri/4
 ,dur+ ! vacation ,i c\ld n ?r[ (f !    

conviction t _h seiz$ hold ( my m9d1 t  
,god 9 8 m]cy _h sp>$ my life1 & p]mitt$
 me to enjoy ?is la/ privilege4 ,at !   
comm5cem5t ( ! ,fall t]m z usual1 we all
 assembl$ on ,sunday morn+--! pr(essors 
9 ! ,hall above1 :ile ! unconv]t$ 7 9 ! 
,hall bel[--to he> ! ,scriptures        
expla9$4 ,miss4 ,sleep]1 "o ( ! tea*]s1 
t assembl$ ) u1 came directly to me aft]
 ! ex]cises 7 ov] & ask$ me if ,i felt z
 ,i did dur+ ! la/ t]m4 ,i told h] no4  
,%e said %e 0 v glad ( x & hop$ ,i %\ld 
n leave (f seek+ until ,i f\nd !        
,savior4 ,i felt t ,i _h committ$       
myself1 t ,i n[ c\ld n draw back1 t ,i  
mu/ p]sev]e on & let ! _w "k t ,i ne$$ a
 ,savi\r to save me f act+ out ! wick$  
/ate ( my he>t4 ,i c\ld n ?r[ x (f4 ,on 
,monday ev5+ all ! unconv]t$ 7 invit$ by
 our mu* lov$ tea*]1 ,miss4 ,haselt9e1  
to meet h] at ! ,hall4 ,accord+ly ,i w5t
 9 company ) sev]al o!r "y ladies4 ,aft]
 read+ ! ,scriptures & address+ u v     
affectionately1 %e ask$ u to kneel d[n &
 jo9 h] 9 pray]4 ,accord+ly ,i did s1 b 

,i ?\ght ,i 0 m h>d5$ ?an ev]2 & felt   
a%am$ t ,i 0 on my b5d$ knees2 b wi%+ to
 act f pr9ciple & to prove :e!r !re 0   
any reality 9 :at my tea*] said ab\t    
religion1 ,i 0 det]m9$ to p]sev]e on1   
al?\gh x 0 contr>y to my c>nal /ate (   
he>t4 ,accord+ly ,i told e "o t ,i meant
 to "k ! real religion ( ,jesus ,*ri/ & 
live up to x1 if x 0 :at !y said x 04 ,i
 att5d$ all ! meet+s & 0 will+ to d any 
?+ t ,i ?\ght ,i ought to d2 b ,i began 
to ?9k t ,i _h griev$ ! ,holy ,_s & 0   
ab\t giv+ up seek+ any long] until ,i   
%\ld feel1 z v (t5 ,i did be=e 9 meet+s 
& !n ,i %\ld h religion4 ,?is 0 on      
,saturday1 a =tnight aft] ,i 0 will+ to 
own t ,i felt ! ne$ ( an int]e/ 9 ,*ri/4
 ,on my way home f s*ool1 a "y lady     
ov]took me & inquir$ :at 0 ! /ate ( my  
feel+s1 ,i frankly told h] :at 0 my     
conclusion4 ,%e !n told me h[ %e f\nd ! 
,savi\r--h[ %e s\ght ?ree ye>s2 b all t 
"t %e said %e 0 seek+ conviction :5 %e  
ought to h s\ght =giv5ess & told me t ,i
 mu/ seek = imm$iate =giv5ess1 & ask$ me

 if ,i 0 will+ to4 ,i told h] t ,i w\ld1
 = ,i f\nd t ,i _h be5 seek+ conviction 
& 0 already convict$4 ,accord+ly ,i w5t 
home1 & aft] d9n] took my ,bible &      
retir$ alone to a grove n f> di/ant1 :]e
 ,i sp5t ! aft]noon 9 read+ & pray+1 b  
did n f9d any *ange 9 my feel+s4 ,i 0   
summonds to tea by ! r++ ( ! bell4 ,i   
w5t 9 & took my seat at ! table1 b :ile 
sitt+ !re ,i ?\ght ,i 0 act+ fooli%ly1 t
 ,i ought n to eat1 dr9k1 or sleep1     
until ,i f\nd =givness4 ,i rose f !     
table & retir$ to my room & knelt d[n & 
ask$ ,god :at ,i %\ld d 9 ord] to be    
=giv52 !n rose up & 0 sitt+ d[n by !    
table ) my head ^u my h& wond]+ :at ,i  
%\ld d1 :5 some?+ seem$ to say to me1   
op5 ! door ( y\r he>t & admit me4 ,i    
imm$iately ?\ght ,i c\ld n )\t ,i 0     
bett]1 b some?+ said no1 n[4 ,i ?\ght ! 
next day be+ ,sunday1 ,i w\ld1 aft] ,i  
_h be5 to *ur*2 b no1 ! voice said n[--t
 ,i said ,i w\ld4 ,if ,*ri/ w\ld b      
receive me1 ,i w\ld him j z ,i 04 ,i    
?\ght ,i w\ld4 ,i rose & walk$ across ! 

room1 & 0 fright5$ to ?9k :at ,i _h     
said2 t ,i _h ent]$ into a cov5ant )    
,god4 ,at t "t a "y lady1 ,m>y ,ann     
,burbank1 ent]$ ! room & ask$ me if ,i 0
 go+ to meet+1 z x 0 cu/om>y to h a     
female pray] meet+ at ! hall on         
,saturday ev5+4 ,i told h] yes4 ,%e said
 x 0 too late4 ,i told h] ,i 0 go+1 7,i 
?\ght if !y 7 j com+ out ,i w\ld g47 ,i 
put on my ?+s1 & %e said %e w\ld g ) me4
 ,accord+ly we w5t out ( ! h\se toge!r &
 said no?+ to ea* o!r4 ,i ?\ght ( no?+ 9
 p>ticul>2 b z we 7 walk+ & _h got a rod
 or two f ! h\se1 ,i ?\ght h[ fa/ ,i 0  
walk+1 & h[ e>ne/ ,i 0 to get !re4 ,i   
spoke to ,miss ,burbank & said t ,i nev]
 w5t to a place ) s mu* eag]ness 9 my   
life4 ,%e ask$ me if ,i felt bett]4 ,i  
told h] t ,i nev] 0 s happy 9 my life4  
,%e said %e 0 glad2 %e _h be5 rec5tly   
baptiz$4 ,i _h be=e n lik$ h] v well1 b 
n[ ,i lov$ h] ) all my he>t1 because %e 
_h own$ ! ,savior be=e ! _w4 ,i         
imm$iately ?\ght ( ! balls & p>ties t ,i
 _h be5 to1 & x seem$ no?+ to :at x w\ld

 be to get into a pray] meet+4 ,x seem$ 
t ! ,bible ,i _h nev] read & t ,i knew  
no?+ ab\t x & :5 ,i tri$ to ?9k ( x !   
passages fl[$ into my m9d fa/] ?an ,i   
c\ld repeat2 ! fir/ passage ,i ?\ght ( 0
 ! ,greeks fooli%ness to ! ,jews1 b to  
!m t believe ,*ri/ ! p[] ( ,god unto    
salvation1 & _m o!rs4 ,x seem$ t ,i     
/epp$ out ( "o _w into ano!r4 ,i w5t    
into ! hall & !y 7 s++1 & !n !y knelt   
d[n & pray$4 ,a "y lady pray$ = me1 see+
 me on my knees4 ,i long$ to h h] close 
h] pray] to tell !m :at ,god _h done =  
me4 ,z we rose ,i op5$ my m\? & words   
fl[$ fa/] ?an ,i c\ld speak1 ,i bless$ &
 prais$ ,god & ask$ !m all to =give me =
 ! opposition t ,i _h manife/$ t[>ds !m 
= _! entreat+ me to be reconcil$ to     
,god4 ,!re 0 great rejoic+ ov] me4 ,"s  
wept1 "s pray$1 & "s sang4 ,x 0 a happy 
"t4 ,"s t 7 seek+ see+ me s happy said  
!y 7 det]m9$ to f9d ! ,savior t night & 
two "y ladies t bo>d$ ) me did1 to ! joy
 ( _! s\ls4 ,i felt t ,i _h a new life  
to live & 0 det]m9$ to live x4 ,i lov$  

all ! p ( ,god1 & my feel+s soon began  
to be tri$ by see+ ! divisions t 7 among
 !m2 b ,i 0 det]m9$ n to h any ?+ to d )
 x1 b meant to keep ! fai? z x 0 once   
deliv]$ to ! ,sa9ts1 t is1 to keep !    
love previ\s to my conv]sion4 ,i _h     
always ?\ght t imm]sion 0 "r1 & /ill    
?\ght s2 b /ill ,i lov$ to he> s9n]s    
call$ to rep5tance1 & to jo9 9 pray] )  
any "o t told h[ ,*ri/ sav$ !m daily f  
s9n+4 ,i felt t ,i mu/ own ! ,savior 9  
all my ways & words1 = x 0 :at ,i lov$1 
& ,i hat$ ! s9 t 0 9 my he>t & (t5 cri$ 
out1 ,o wret*$ p]son t ,i am1 :o %all   
deliv] me f ?is body ( s9 & dea?4 ,i    
long$ to be fre$ f s94 ,i soon began to 
?9k ( becom+ a mission>y1 t is1 to g to 
! f> di/ant hea!n :o _h nev] he>d ( !   
,gospel4 ,i ask$ ,god :at ,i %\ld d4 ,i 
0 det]m9$ to d :at ,god gave me to d at 
! exp5se ( my life1 = ,i c\nt$ n my life
 de> unto me1 & soon ! _s l$ me 9 pray] 
= my p>5ts1 b h[ c\ld !y be conv]t$ )\t 
! way ( salvation 0 expla9$ to !m8 ,!y  
did n att5d public wor%ip2 !y believ$ t 

!y %\ld be sav$ :5 !y %\ld die2 b ,i _h 
f\nd a ,savi\r t sav$ me "h f s9n+1 = ! 
love ( ,god con/ra9$ me to lay d[n all  
e>?ly enjoym5ts :5 !y came 9 contact )  
any ?+ t ,i mu/ d = ,*ri/4 ,i ?\ght ,i  
w\ld g to !m & tell !m1 ?9k+ !y w\ld    
believe me4 ,accord+ly on my return f   
s*ool ,i visit$ my p>5ts1 b n until !   
,spr+1 on fa/ day1 ) my y\nge/ bro!r4   
,we pass$ ! day v agreeably4 ,i told !m 
t ,i _h met ) a *ange1 b said b little1 
z ,i did n wi% to argue ! po9t1 = !y 7  
bo? aga9/ me & said !y ?\ght ,i _h got  
my bra9 turn$ by /udy+ too mu*4 ,b ,i   
knew ,i mu/ be> ?is & great] ?+s if ,i  
wi%$ to d my heav5ly ,fa!r's w1 :i* 0 my
 meat & dr9k4 ,i left home )\t pray+ =  
!m1 :i* ,i felt condemn$ =4 ,i resolv$  
if ,god w\ld sp>e my life to g home aga9
 ,i w\ld be> ! cross ( ,*ri/4 ,dur+ !   
w9t] my m9d _h be5 mu* tri$ ab\t ! two  
ord9ances2 & :at to d1 ,i did n "k1 = ,i
 wi%$ to give a reasonable answ] :y ,i  
w5t ) "o class ( ,god's p m ?an ano!r4  
,i bo>d$ ) a ,mr ,wa%burn1 a v pi\s man 

belong+ to ! ,fir/ ,congregational *ur* 
9 ,l[ell4--,i said no?+ to him ab\t =ms 
& c]emonies1 nor he to me2 b ,i came to 
! conclusion to be an imm]s$            
,congregationali/1 because !y admitt$   
all to ! communion t _h pr(ess$ !       
,savior be=e ! _w4 ,i conclud$ to return
 to s*ool1 & call$ ^u ,mrs ,tilton1 "o (
 my acquiantance t belong$ to ! ,bapti/ 
,*ur*4 ,%e ask$ me :y ,i _h n be5 9 to  
see h]1 & %e ?\ght my m9d _h be5 tri$   
ab\t baptism4 ,i told h] n 9 ! lea/1 =  
,i always ?\ght imm]sion 0 "r b my m9d 0
 tri$ ab\t ! communion--:y all ! p (    
,god c\ld n come toge!r4 ,%e said t %e  
_h a little book %e w\ld l5d me to read4
 ,i took x & w5t home & read x2 x 0 ^u  
,*ur* & ,*ri/ian fell[%ip4 ,i ?\ght x   
expla9$ x to my m9d & told h] ,i 0      
?ankful = x2 b z ,i 0 to />t = ,new     
,hampton ! next day c\ld n be baptiz$   
!re4 ,i arriv$ at ,new ,hampton ! second
 week 9 ,may1 #ahce1 & met once m my mu*
 lov$ tea*]s4 ,dur+ ! ,summ] t]m my m9d 
0 mu* tak5 up ) my /udies1 & ! religi\s 

/ate ( feel+ 0 v l[4 ,!re 7 no          
conv]sions dur+ ?is t]m4 ,at !          
comm5cem5t ( ! ,fall t]m our tea*]      
address$ u ^u ! subject & hop$ t ea* "o 
w\ld d some?+ to w9 s9n]s to ,*ri/4 ,all
 felt x1 & aga9 ,god p\r$ out 8 ,holy   
,_s & s9n]s 7 sla92 my heal? 0 poor & ,i
 0 ab\t leav+ s*ool on acc\nt ( my      
limit$ means4 ,my tea*] ask$ me if ,i 0 
n go+ to be baptiz$ be=e ,i left s*ool1 
toge!r ) "s o!r "y ladies4 ,i _h always 
?\ght ,i 0 will+1 %\ld ! opportunity be 
pres5t$4 ,"h ,i _h a trial1 b w5t =w>d )
 "s o!rs1 det]m9$ nev] to disobey ,god (
 keep+ 8 comm&m5ts or do+ :atev] ! love 
( ,god con/ra9$ me to d1 h[ev] cross+ x 
0 to my c>nal feel+s4 ,i return$ to     
,l[ell & resum$ my labor1 /ill feel+    
det]m9$ to procure an education to g to 
! poor hea!n to c>ry ! news ( salvation2
 b my means became limit$ & ,i 0 oblig$ 
to use prud5ce 9 ref]5ce to my dress &  
sp5d+ my "t4 ,my olde/ si/] propos$ to h
 me come & "w ) h] at ! tailoress       
bus9ess 9 ,bo/on1 & ?is si/] ,i _h      

ard5tly lov$ & look$ up to = advice4 ,b 
,i 0 mak+ v good wages at t "t & ?\ght x
 n be/ = me to g !n2 al?\gh ,i want$ a  
trade to help me along 9 case ,i %\ld g 
among ! poor & de/itute4 ,b z my si/]   
,nancy's heal? 0 n good at t "t ,i      
propos$ = h] to g to ,bo/on & ,i w\ld   
come 9 ! ,fall or e>ly 9 ! ,w9t]1 :i* 0 
agre$ to4 ,i conclud$ to g to "w ) my   
si/] until ! slack "t %\ld come on 9 !  
,w9t]1 & !n ,i ?\ght ,i %\ld g to       
,*>le/[n ,sem9>y to f9i% my education1 z
 we 7 all to bo>d ourselves4 ,accord+ly 
,i left ! mill aga9 & :5 ,i got to my   
si/]'s !y 7 j on ! po9t ( sep>at+4 ,i   
/epp$ 9 betwe5 & propos$ to reconcile   
matt]s = we all belong$ to ! ,bapti/    
,*ur*1 & = own "* & ! cause ( ,*ri/ ,i  
?\ght x be/ to keep toge!r4 ,b x 0 n    
possible1 we c\ld n agree1 ?\gh si/]    
,m>y & ,i _h nev] be=e disagre$1 &      
probably nev] %\ld _h x n be5 = si/]    
,nancy4 ,x 0 a sore trial to me & ,i (t5
 ?\ght t my la/ e>?ly fri5d 0 tak5 f me4
 ,i _h lov$ si/] ,m>y until x _h become 

a s9 9 ! sight ( a holy ,god1 t ,i _h   
be5 gov]n$ ab\t my spiritual life by h] 
9 "p1 & t ,he saw fit to sep]ate u4     
,?r\gh ! invitation ( my bro!r ,eb5's   
wife ,i w5t to /ay ) h] & _h regul> pay 
le/ !re %\ld be any room = unpleasant   
feel+s1 ,i sp5t ! w9t] ) h] at ,jamaica 
,pla9 v happy1 b ,i began to ?9k t ,i 0 
n liv+ z ,i ought to2 t ,i c\ld be !    
means ( do+ m good by work+ 9 ! mill &  
gett+ m money = ! cause ( ,*ri/ & come 9
 contact ) m m9ds to pursuade !m to     
become reconcil$ to ,god4 ,b aga9 ,i 0  
tri$ ab\t pursu+ an education1 n hav+   
means to d )4 ,:at to d ,i did n "k1 &  
at times 0 almo/ tempt$ to ask assi/ance
 ( my bro!rs1 b = fe> ( be+ refus$ ,i   
d>$ n1 = !y nev] seem$ to take any      
int]e/ 9 ! welf>e ( _! si/]s4 ,my olde/ 
si/] 0 (t5 sick & 0 n help$ by !m3 !re=e
 ,i 0 det]m9$ to d :at ,i c\ld )\t ask+ 
help4 ,i left my bro!r's 9 ,june #ahcf1 
n decid$ :at to d4 ,aw>e t 9 "s bran*es 
,i 0 n qualifi$ suffici5tly to take a "y
 ladies' s*ool1 ,i w5t home n decid$ :at

 to d1 b ?\ght ,i w\ld g ) a "y lady t  
,i 0 acqua9t$ ) 9 ,we/=d "u private     
in/ruction1 & accord+ly w5t & /ay$ ) h] 
till ,fall4 ,a new ,precept] 0 ab\t op5+
 ! ,academy 9 ,we/=d1 & ,i resolv$ to g 
! ,w9t] t]m1 & accord+ly provid$ myself 
) a bo>d+ place at ,mr ,niehols1 :]e ,i 
f\nd x v pleasant4 ,!y 7 bo? pi\s & ,i  
became v mu* atta*$ to ,mrs ,n4 & f\nd !
 s*ool v pleasant = ! bran*es t ,i wi%$ 
to pursue2 b on acc\nt ( a *ange 9 ?is  
family ,i 0 "u ! necessity ( gett+ ano!r
 bo>d+ place2 !n ,i w5t to a ,mr ,george
 ,davis' :]e ,i _h always be5 acqua9t$1 
& f\nd e ?+ pleasant & 0 happy4 ,b my   
heal? began to fail me1 be+ tr\bl$ ) !  
,ticdoloreux4  ,n hav+ ! means to       
cont9ue any long] at s*ool1 s poor 0 my 
heal? at t "t1 ,i began to ?9k ( return+
 to ,l[ell2 b ab\t ?is "t a book 0      
circulat+1 relative to ! day ( ,judgm5t 
be+ ne> at h&4 ,i obta9$ x & read x1 &  
f\nd t x 0 no?+ b expla9+ ! ,scriptures 
accord+ to my view 9 a hi/orical mann]1 
or ! prea*+ ! ,gospel 9 its purity4 ,i  

felt prep>$ to meet ,*ri/1 b 0 (t5 ask$ 
:at ,i ?\ght ( x8 ,i told !m x 0 a sweet
 subject to me1 = ,i long$ to be ) him  
:o _h lov$ me & giv5 himself = me & 0   
will+ to d all = ,him :ile ,i /ay$ ^u ! 
e>? & did n "k h[ ,i c\ld alt] my life  
if x 0 true1 = if ,i 0 n prep>$ ,i %\ld 
prep>e myself4 ,b ,i _h already giv5 my 
he>t to ! ,"l & 0 try+ to live to 8     
honor & glory4 ,! subject 0 v mu*       
agitat$ 9 ,we/=d4 ,i soon left & w5t to 
,l[ell1 & tri$ to obta9 a book1 b c\ld  
n1 & no "o seem$ to "k any ?+ ab\t x4 ,i
 w5t into ! factory to "w1 b soon an old
 acqua9tance1 ,nancy ,sanborn1 come to  
see me4 ,%e _h always anticipat$ go+ (f 
to tea*4 ,we propos$ op5+ a s*ool 9     
,l[ell = "y ladies1 b my heal? 0 n good 
& ,i _h no?+ to d )1 & some?+ seem$ to  
say to me1 :at y d1 d quickly1 = ! end (
 all ?+s is j at h&4 ,i w5t to ,god 9   
pray] to ask ,him :at to d4 ,i li/5$ to 
! ,savi\r's voice :i* con/ra9$ me to w9 
s\ls to ,*ri/ by liv+ out my religion   
ar\nd me by ! way ( ! _s & n ( le>n+2 b 

at t "t ,god _h suff]$ me to be c>ri$   
away into ,babylon & become a wor%ipp] (
 ! ,god ( le>n+4 ,my fri5d1 ,nancy      
,sanborn left me & return$ home & ,i    
conclud$ to live 9 ! factory = e plan t 
,i laid seem$ to be ?w>t$4 ,i (t5 _h    
some?+ giv5 to me to d by ,god :i* ,i   
f\nd 0 contr>y to my c>nal feel+s4 ,i   
bo>d$ at ?is "t ) a ,mrs ,k+1 on ! ,boot
 corporation4--,my si/] ,nancy want$ to 
come & bo>d ) me4 ,we nev] _h agre$ f   
little *ildr51 & twice ,i _h left ! mill
 on h] acc\nt & my bo>d+ h\se1 & z ,i   
always ?\ght if x _h n be5 = h] ,i & my 
si/] ,m4 nev] w\ld h disagre$4 ,b ,i    
?\ght if x 0 9 me ,i w\ld conqu] x at ! 
exp5se ( ! la/ feel+ ,i _h 9 me2 b "h 0 
ano!r firey trial ( my fai?4 ,i ev]     
c>ri$ all my actions be=e ! judgm5t seat
 ( ,*ri/4 ,i felt ,i 0 n my own1 ,i 0   
b\ght ) a price--! preci\s blood ( !    
,lamb4 ,my object 0 to get money to g to
 ! ,we/ z a tea*] to w9 s\ls to ,*ri/4  
,my si/] 0 tak5 sick & ,i /aid out ( !  
mill to take c>e ( h]4 ,i 0 at ?is "t   

t5d+ d\ble "w4 ,:5 ! physician call$ ^u 
h] we 7 drawn 9 conv]sation ab\t p 9    
g5]al tak+ too mu* m$ic9e4 ,i 0 innoc5t 
ab\t giv+ any (f5ce4 ,i took !          
directions ab\t my si/]'s m$ic9e1 & aft]
 ! ,doctor _h left ! h\se spoke ab\t h] 
tak+ x4 ,%e said %e %\ld n take x & did 
n wi% me to d any ?+ = h]2 b w\ld say no
 m4 ,i told h] t x 0 fooli% = me to /ay 
out ( ! mill if %e w\ld n let me take   
c>e ( h]1 & began to reason ! case2 b   
c\ld n prevail ^u h] & fe>$ t we %\ld   
aga9 fall out4 ,i endeavor$ to keep my  
feel+s "u & try to d = h] :e!r %e w\ld  
let me or n2 b x did no good4 ,my       
acqua9tance 0 a circle ( "y ladies (    
respectability & we _h pray] meet+s & ,i
 _h be5 v =w>d 9 !m--,i _h _h an ev5+   
s*ool & op5$ x ) pray]4 ,to h a fall+   
out ) my si/] w\ld hurt ! casuse (      
,*ri/1 :i* 0 de>] to me ?an my life4 ,i 
keep x to myself & tri$ to get along1 = 
:5 !re is difficulty !re is blame on bo?
 sides2 b x k9dl$ to a flame1 yet ,i    
said b little ab\t x4 ,b ,i c\nt$ x all 

joy1 = x humbl$ me1 = my e>?ly "* 0 l ! 
apple ( my eye to me1 & ,i came to !    
conclusion t x 0 bett] to bo>d ap>t4 ,i 
!re=e det]m9$ to *ange my bo>d+ place1 &
 say no?+ ab\t x to any "o4 ,i w5t to   
,bo/on on a visit & engag$ my bo>d+     
place be=e ,i w5t1 at ,mrs ,lufk9's1 a  
memb] ( ! fir/ ,bapti/ ,*ur* 9 ,l[ell4  
,on my visit to ,bo/on ,i met ) a "y    
lady at my bro!r's by ! "n ( ,c>ol9e    
,damm]s1 t 0 out ( employm5t1 & _h be5 =
 "s "t4 ,i 0 in=m$ t %e 0 9 a de/itute  
situation & pr(ess$ to be a foll[] ( !  
,lamb4 ,i propos$ = h] to come up to    
,l[ell1 & %e w\ld f9d employm5t !re ( "s
 k9d1 ?9k+ x 0 n "r = any "o to live s1 
= x 0 n sett+ a good example2 & z %e _h 
no "o to d = h]1 my religion l$ me to d 
all t ,i c\ld = ! fri5dless1 feel+      
myself a /rang] & a pilgrim "h bel[4    
,accord+ly on my return %e came & ,i    
soon f\nd h] a situation1 & %e be+ an   
orphan ,i ?\ght ,i c\ld help h]1 = pure 
religion is do+ good = ! wid[ & !       
orphan4 ,i bo>d$ at ,mrs ,lufk9's until 

w>m wea!r & ,c>ol9e ,damm]s bo>d$ ) me &
 work$ on ! ,suffolk4 ,x be+ too f> = h]
 to walk 9 w>m wea!r ,i propos$ to *ange
 my bo>d+ place to make x ne>] = h]4    
,mr ,lufk9's si/] 0 ab\t op5+ a bo>d+   
h\se on ! ,boot corporation4 ,i _h      
become some:at acqua9t$ ) h] at h]      
bro!r's & lik$ h] v mu* :ile h] bro!r's 
folks w5t on a visit to _! fri5ds4 ,"h 0
 ! only "t t ev] ,i 0 sick or ne$$ any  
m$ical assi/ance4 ,my /oma* 0 a little  
nauseat$ & ,i s5t = ,dr ,:eelock ,graves
 & he gave me an emetic3 aft]w>ds ,i    
call$ ^u him once & got a receipe = a   
c\gh & paid him2 ?is 0 9 ! summ] (      
#ahdj4 ,my heal? 0 always delicate1 b ,i
 0 v c>eful :at ,i did2 v seldom w5t out
 ev5+s1 n s mu* z to an ev5+ meet+ or to
 expose myself to ! ev5+ air 9 any way1 
hop+ t at "s future p]iod ,i %\ld be s  
situat$ z to be able to live m devot$ to
 ! bless$ cause ( ,*ri/2 b ,i endeavor$ 
to %[ piety at home4 ,i _h embrac$ !    
views t ! day ( judgm5t 0 ne> at h& & ,i
 felt to d\ble my dilig5ce to obta9 !   

means to spread ! ,gospel4 ,i lov$ ,god 
& ! p ( ,god1 = :]e s9 ab\nd$ grace mu* 
m ab\nd$1 ,i felt a desire t ,god w\ld  
p\r out 8 holy _s & t s9n]s might be    
conv]t$1 & began to call ^u ! ,"l & to  
my surprise ,i f\nd myself 9 a          
back-slidd5 /ate2 t ,i _h lo/ ! lib]ty  
:]eby ,*ri/ _h made me free4  ,h[ ,i got
 back !re ,i did n "k1 b ! way ,i f\nd !
 ,savior 0 by own+ him be=e ! _w & ,i   
knew ! only way 0 to g & s[ to ! _s4 ,i 
began to ask ! ,"l :at he w\ld h me to  
d1 & ?+ aft] ?+ 0 giv5 me1 b 0 accus$ ( 
believ+ 9 ,mill]'s doctr9e1 z x is      
call$4 ,i f\nd t x 0 ab\t to br+ ^u me  
reproa* & ,i d5i$ x & !n ,i 0 tr\bl$4 ,i
 c\ld n re/ day nor night1 & ,i felt t  
,i 0 n prep>$ to meet ,him1 & ,i b[$    
myself be=e ! ,"l & ask$ ! ,"l :at ,he  
w\ld h me to d2 & soon ,i 0 s5t )       
message aft] message to ! p ( ,god :]e x
 0 my usual cu/om to assemble1 z x 0 !  
privilege ( ! females to give a ^w (    
exhortation4 ,said no?+ to any "o1 b 0  
det]m9$ to d :at ! ,"l bid me1 & to walk

 9 ! ,"l4 ,my m9d 0 unbias$ by ! errors 
9 !ology1 or any cre$s or doctr9e ( m54 
,all ,i knew 0 ! simple religion (      
,jesus ,*ri/1 & ! ,bible 0 my guide4 ,i 
mu/ obey ,god & keep 8 comm&m5ts4 ,at   
?is "t ! subject ( ! union ( *ri/ians 0 
mu* agitat$2 ! divisions ( !m _h be5 a  
s\rce ( grief to me ev] s9ce ,i 0       
conv]t$1 & ! union ( !m 0 some?+ sweet  
if !re 0 any gr\nd on :i* !y c\ld be    
unit$4 ,eld] ,holly 0 lectur+ at ?is "t 
^u x & %[$ by ! ,bible ! gr\nd on :i* !y
 c\ld be unit$4 ,i ask$ ! ,"l :at he    
w\ld h me to d1 & w5t to ! ,bible =     
in/ruction4 ,9 ,revelations x says t    
:oev] takes f ! say+s ( ! prophecy ( t  
book 8 "p %all be tak5 out ( ! holy     
city1 c4 ,rev4 #ab *ap4 #ah?1 #ai?      
v]ses1 ,i f\nd t articles ( fai? bo?    
took f & add$ !re unto & already ,i felt
 ! plagues ^u me4 ,i cri$ unto ! ,"l1 = 
,i c\ld say ) ,david1 ! pangs ( hell got
 hold ( me & dea? encompass$ me r\nd    
ab\t4 ,i call$ ^u ! ,"l & he he>d me out
 ( ,8 ,holy habitation4 ,i told no "o ( 

my situation = ,i ?\ght x 0 ! ,"l t 0   
deal+ ) me & _h got to h a trial ( my   
fai?1 ,i felt t ,i 0 will+ to die a     
m>tyr r ?an to d5y ,jesus ,*ri/ be=e !  
_w4 ,x 0 ! la/ ,idol ,i held 9 my he>t  
,i mu/ give up4 ,x 0 my e>?ly "*2 ,i mu/
 g )\t ! camp & be> reproa* = ,*ri/4 ,i 
w5t to see my m9i/]1 & told him h[ ! ,"l
 0 deal+ ) me4 ,i told him h[ ! ,"l _h  
%[n me t articles ( fai? 7 a s9 by !    
,bible & t ,i did n want any ?+ to d )  
pursuasions4 ,i want$ to keep ,god's    
comm&m5ts1 = ,i hat$ ! v g>m5t t 0      
spott$ ) ! fle%2 ,i w\ld h my "n tak5 (f
 ! *ur* books1 b n (f 8 he>t1 = ,i lov$ 
! p ( ,god4 ,i want$ to g to ! communion
 table & /ill held to ! ord9ance (      
baptism2 b ,i want$ to get out ( s94 ,he
 said if ,i did n walk ) ! *ur* 9 peace1
 he mu/ excommunicate me4 ,i ask$ h]    
=givness if ,i _h said any?+ t _h injur$
 8 feel+s1 = ,i only want$ to get out ( 
s9 & ,i mu/ "w out my own salvation )   
fe> & trembl+4 ,he !n told me if ,i did 
n come back into ! bosom ( ! true *ur*  

he w\ld excommunicate me & t w\ld ru9 my
 reputation4 ,i told him t ,i 0 will+ to
 die if ,i c\ld b w9 s\ls to ,*ri/2 b ,i
 hat$ s91 & !re=e he mu/ d z he ?\ght   
be/1 z x 0 n fle% & blood t ,i _h any ?+
 to d )1 nei!r 7 weapons c>nal4 ,?is 0  
at 8 h\se1 ,i ?9k 9 ! mon? ( ,june4 ,i  
bid him a good morn+ & on my way home ,i
 felt to bless & praise ,god4 ,on ! next
 ,sabba? ,i att5d$ *ur* at ,eld]        
,cole's1 ! ,*ri/ian d5om9ation4 ,! ^w ( 
! ,"l 0 sweet to me1 z x 0 n[ ,i want$ !
 ^w ( ! ,"l to support me & to com=t me4
 ,i want$ to he> no?+ b ! sweets (      
r$eem+ love4 ,9 ?ree weeks ,i w5t to see
 ,mr ,port]1 he be+ my m9i/]4 ,i 0      
excommunicat$2 b x br\ght me out 9 a    
happy /ate4 ,i cont9u$ my labor1 :i* 0  
t5d+ ?ree looms2 b (t5 spoke ( :at ! ,"l
 _h done = me & h[ pla9 ! ,bible 0 to   
me4 ,i att5d$ a meet+ held at ,groton on
 ! union ( *ri/ians1 to he> :at 0 to be 
said4 ,x 0 !re :]e ,i receiv$ ! baptism 
( ! ,holy ,gho/1 z previ\s to ?is ,i _h 
be5 baptiz$ ) fire 9 com+ out ( !       

,bapti/ *ur*3 = z ,i receiv$ ,*ri/ s ,i 
walk$ 9 him1 :i* 0 walk+ 9 ! love2 =    
curs$ is he t doe? ! "w ( ! ,"l         
deceitfully1 aft] ! mann] !y call$      
h]esy4 ,s wor%ip ,i ! ,god ( my ,fa!rs4 
,i (t5 spoke ( my spiritual life1 & _m  
obs]v$ t !y nev] saw any "o enjoy s mu*4
 ,i cont9u$ my labor & att5d$ ! appo9t$ 
meet+s ) my own p t wor%ipp$ ,god       
accord+ to my views1 & ,i 0 receiv$ by  
!m & w5t ) no o!rs1 = ! p ( ,god %\ld be
 peace mak]s & let e "o wor%ip ,god aft]
 _! own way4 ,!re arose viol5t          
p]secutions aga9/ me1 b z my =]unn] _h  
suff]$ be=e me1 s mu/ ,i suff]4 ,i (t5  
?\ght t ,i w\ld give up my bus9ess &    
labor entirely = ! ,"l2 & !n ,i ?\ght   
:at %\ld ,i d = a home8 ,i felt ! want (
 "o1 & my y\nge/ bro!r _h be5 sick & ,i 
?\ght he might be emb>rass$ 9 8         
circum/ances1 & if ,i help$ him 9       
temporal ?+s he w\ld he> me 9 spiritual2
 & ,i 0 v anxi\s to help him1 z he _h   
done mu* = our p>5ts :5 he 0 q "y1 :ile 
my old] bro!rs :o 7 q weal?y1 did n help

 !m1 comp>atively speak+4 ,i _h done mu*
 = ?is bro!r1 feel+ anxi\s to see him   
get along 9 ! _w1 & !re=e ,i 0 dilig5t  
to my labors4 ,b ,i began to feel t ,i  
c\ld n "w any long] at pres5t4 ,! week  
be=e ,i 0 c>ri$ to ! hospital ,i ?\ght  
,i w\ld g to my m9i/] & tell him my     
situation4 ,i w5t to 8 h\se1 b he 0 n at
 home4 ,i !n w5t & conv]s$ ) bro!r      
,fiske :o 0 kn[+ to my p]secutions1 & he
 advis$ me to g & see ,eld] ,cole4 ,i   
told him he 0 n at home1 & ,i knew n :at
 to d4 ,i /ill cont9u$ my "w & did n g  
home2 x 0 n ! place = me1 z my p>5ts 7 n
 spiritual m9d$1 & 9 my weak /ate ,i    
felt ,i c\ld n be> opposition1 & ,i hat$
 s9 s ,i c\ld n cont5d1 = a *ild (      
cont5tion is a *ild ( hell4 ,on ,sunday 
morn+1 ,nov4 #bb;d1 #ahdj1 :ile ,i 0    
conv]s+ ) a v pi\s lady t slept ) me    
ab\t h[ ,god _h dealt ) me1 & h[ ,i _h  
disobey$ ! _s1 be+ (t5 call$ ^u to      
speak1 h[ awful x w\ld be to be ca/ (f f
 ! ,"l1 ,i told h] t ,i 0 b\nd 9 ! _s1 &
 ask$ h] if ,i kept ! comm&m5ts ( ,god  

if he w\ld ca/ me (f8 ,%e said no4 ,b "h
 0 ! fir/ ( my weakness t gave place =  
satan to arrange 8 ho/ to take me4 ,:y  
,i gave up to su* weakness ,i "k n1 nor 
c ,i acc\nt = x1 except ,i _h ov]done   
myself4 ,!re 0 no di/ress ( m9d1 & if   
!re 01 x 0 no reason :y ,i %\ld n h be5 
treat$ ) common humanity1 = ,i (f]$ no  
insult to any "o1 or treat$ any "o ill4 
,i only spoke ( my own situation & ask$ 
!m to d = me & n let me d wick$ly4 ,miss
 ,elza ,lufk9 came into ! room1 ! lady  
:om ,i bo>d$ )1 & ask$ me :at 0 ! matt]4
 ,i began to talk to h] ab\t my         
situation & to tell h] h[ good religion 
01 & ask$ h] to h x4 ,^u t %e said _m   
unk9d ?+s to me4 ,i saw t %e 0 angry )  
me4 ,:y %e %\ld treat me s ,i did n "k1 
= ,i _h be5 v c>eful to obs]ve all      
regulations & rules ( h] h\se1 & nev]   
spoke ab\t temporal ?+s1 to f9d fault4  
,%e _h oppos$ me 9 att5d+ my appo9t$    
meet+s1 & ?\ght t ,i might g to a meet+ 
t 0 ne>]2 b ,i ?\ght x 0 n "r to g to   
any o!r ?an :]e ,i 0 receiv$ by relat+  

my exp]i5ce1 & t ,i ought to be my own  
judge4 ,b ! way ( ! ,"l is contr>y to ! 
natural /ate ( ! he>t4 ,s9ce ,i came out
 ( ! hospital ,miss ,lufk9 has told me t
 %e 0 nev] s angry 9 h] life z %e 0 )   
me4 ,if my religion _h displeas$ h] %e  
ought to h told me s :5 ,i 0 well1 & ,i 
w\ld h f\nd ano!r place1 & n wait$ until
 ,i 0 9 a weak /ate & !n take !         
advantage ( my weakness4 ,my si/] ,nancy
 came 9 to see me & began to scold me4  
,i told h] x 0 v wick$1 %e 0 n :]e %e   
ought to be1 or %e c\ld n d s4 ,i arose 
& dress$ myself & ask$ n to h any "o ( !
 unconv]t$ come into my room4 ,i s5t =  
,eld] ,cole1 b he n kn[+ my situation1  
s5t ^w t x 0 n conv5i5t4 ,bro!r ,james  
came 9 to see me & ask$ me to g home4 ,i
 ?\ght x 0 n be/ 9 my weak /ate1 = ,i   
felt t ,i _h no home1 z ,i 0 viol5tly   
oppos$ by my p>5ts4 ,i felt unwill+ to  
leave my "w1 z ,i 0 t5d+ ?ree looms1 &  
_h calculat$ to make out a c]ta9 sum (  
money by ! fir/ ( ,febru>y1 = my bro!r  
,james4 ,i ask$ my si/] to g & get me "s

 assafoetida pills1 ,i took ?ree ( !m & 
w5t to b$ & slept s\nd all night4 ,9 !  
morn+ ,i told my si/]1 :o slept ) me1 ,i
 %\ld n g 9 to "w4 ,%e !n began to      
scold1 & %ook me ) ang]1 because ,i did 
n wi% to rise4 ,!n ,i ask$ h] to let me 
alone1 & told h] x 0 v wick$4 ,at t "t  
,miss ,lufk9 came into ! room & told h] 
to let me alone1 ^u t %e did1 & began to
 prep>e to g to h] "w4 ,i ask$ h] n to  
come back1 = ,i did n want h] ) me4 ,i  
?\ght %e 0 n a prop] p]son to be ) me1 z
 %e did n und]/& my spiritual life4 ,i  
w5t d[n & took my breakfa/ & return$ up 
/airs to avoid my si/]'s say+ any?+4    
,soon my si/] return$ & ,i ask$ h] to   
s5d = my m9i/]4 ,%e said ,i %\ld n see  
him nor any "o ( ^? p4 ,i began to      
reason ) h]1 & ask$ h] :y ,i c\ld n see 
my own m9i/]1 & if ,i _h n a "r to *oose
 my own p to wor%ip ,god )2 b ,i c\ld n 
prevail ^u h]4 ,i ask$ to see my bro!r  
,james1 b ?is reque/ 0 n grant$4 ,i     
p]ceiv$ my weakness 0 increas+ & ,i     
?\ght ! p ( ,god ought to d = me4 ,?is 0

 on ,monday4 ,ab\t #d o'clock 9 !       
aft]noon ,dr4 ,:eelock ,graves came 9 to
 see me1 & sat ab\t t5 m9utes & conv]s$ 
mo/ly ) my si/] ab\t ,mr4 ,mill]1 say+ t
 he ought to be horse:ipp$ or put 9     
prison4 ,i conclud$ t my bro!r & si/] _h
 be5 tell+ him t ,i 0 "o ( 8 conv]ts1   
al?\gh my si/] pr(esses to be wa%$ by ! 
blood ( ! ,lamb4 ,! ,doctor felt ( my   
pulse4 ,i told him he did n und]/& my   
situation4 ,he prescrib$ no?+ = me &    
left ! room1 my si/] sat sew+ & did no?+
 = me4 ,at night aft] ! girls came out (
 ! mill !re 0 a great ru% into my room1 
:i* increas$ my excitem5t4 ,my room 0   
full1 "s say+ "o ?+1 "s ano!r1 :ile o!rs
 7 laugh+4 ,i ask$ ,e/h] ,ri*]1 :o /ood 
laugh+1 to g out1 z %e _h oppos$ me mu* 
ab\t att5d+ meet+ among ! ,*ri/ian      
d5om9ation4 ,^u t a good si/] 9 ,*ri/ by
 ! "n ( ,t[ns5d1 said %e ?\ght !re 7 too
 _m 9 my room1 & !n !y all left me alone
 ) my si/]4 ,i ?\ght ,i _h h9d]$ h] "s  
by h] tak+ h] "w home f ! %op1 & ,i (f]$
 to sew = h]4 ,%e took ! "w out ( my h& 

& told me to g to b$4 ,my si/] slept )  
me4 ,i spoke to h] 9 ! night1 & %e      
scold$ me = x4 ,z soon z ,i he>d ,miss  
,lufk9 up 9 ! morn+ ,i w5t to ! door &  
ask$ h] to take c>e ( me & n let me d   
wick$ly = my si/] 0 unk9d to me4 ,i felt
 ! want ( a k9d fri5d4 ,%e said %e w\ld1
 & made a fire 9 my room4 ,i ?\ght t ,i 
w\ld give ! _w = a k9d fri5d to take me 
& d = me4 ,aga9 ,i plead to see ,eld]   
,cole1 my m9i/]1 or "s "o ( ! *ur*4 ,%e 
said x 0 all 9 va9 = me to say any?+    
ab\t x4 ,ab\t noon ,eld] ,cole came d[n 
to see me1 he>+ ( my situation4 ,he     
talk$ k9dly to me2 ?\ght ,i _h work$ too
 h>d & ov] ex]t$ myself1 & told me to   
take "s val]ian tea1 said he w\ld s5d   
,dr4 ,sprague to see me4 ,miss ,lufk9   
said %e ?\ght ,dr4 ,graves w\ld t5d me4 
,i told !m ,i did n wi% ,dr4 ,graves1 = 
he knew no?+ ab\t me nor spirituality4  
,i want$ ,dr4 ,sprague1 z he 0 kn[+ to  
my p]secutions1 & 8 wife 0 a de> si/] to
 me 9 ,*ri/ ,jesus4 ,he _h be5 d[n to   
see me1 b 0 n admitt$4 ,i told ,eld]    

,cole ,i w\ld d j z he told me4 ,my si/]
 _h ask$ me if %e %\ld s5d = bro!r      
,/eph58 ,i told h] no1 = ,i did n wi%   
him to "k any ?+ ab\t me1 = he _h s     
cruelly treat$ me1 :i* be=e ?is ,i _h   
kept to myself4 ,likewise 8 wife _h     
manife/$ ! greate/ hatr$ t[>ds ! pres5t 
day re=m ( prep>+ to meet ,*ri/1 & w>n+ 
o!rs to be also ready1 al?\gh %e belongs
 to a congregational *ur*4 ,b ,i _h     
endeavor$ to keep ! fai? ) h] z ) e "o t
 pr(esses to be a foll[] ( ! ,lamb4 ,my 
si/] took ! advantage ( my weakness1 &  
unkn[n to me1 s5t = bro!r ,/eph5 to come
 & get me4 ,?is bro!r resides 9 ,bo/on4 
,?is 0 ! ?ird day f leav+ my "w2 !re _h 
be5 no?+ done = me1 al?\gh ,i h s9ce    
le>n$ t _m ( my associates call$ & (f]$ 
to d = me1 b 7 n p]mitt$4 ,:at k9d (    
treatm5t is ?is 9 ?is ,gospel l& ( light
 & lib]ty8 ,! _s ( ! vile/ p]secutions  
began to be rais$ aga9/ me 9 t h\se1 &  
n[ 0 a favorable opportunity = x to be  
complet$4 ,ab\t #d o'clock bro!r ,/eph5 
came 9 & ask$ me to g d[n & sp5d        

,?anksgiv+ ) !m1 z he 0 up on bus9ess1 &
 ask$ ,nancy & bro!r ,james likewise4   
,we all conclud$ to g2 b ,i hesitat$ "s1
 = ,i nev] _h gone any :]e aft] ,i _h   
met ) a *ange ( he>t1 )\t go+ to d ,god 
s]vice1 = ,i felt t ,i 0 n my own2 ,i 0 
b\ght ) a price1 ! preci\s blood ( !    
,lamb4 ,bro!r ,/eph5 said he w\ld be !re
 9 half an h\r4 ,i w5t & prep>$ myself2 
took :at "w ,i ?\ght ,i %\ld want on a  
visit1 & 0 sitt+ 9 my room :5 my bro!r  
,/eph5 & ,dr4 ,graves came 94--,!       
,doctor ask$ me if ,i 0 go+ on a visit )
 my bro!r8--,i told him yes4 ,!y bo? w5t
 d[n /airs toge!r into ! front room1 &  
,i w5t d[n & took my leave ( !          
family4--,little did ,i ?9k t ,dr4      
,graves 0 call$ 9 to give a l9e to h me 
c>ri$ into an ,insane ,hospital--a poor 
girl t he knew no?+ ab\t1 nor ! peculi> 
circum/ances ( ! family1 t _h always    
rais$ a report aga9/ me t ,i 0 d]ang$   
ev] s9ce ,i w5t to ,new ,hampton to     
s*ool1 because x 0 !re t ,i met ) a     
*ange4  ,i h be5 p>ticul> 9 speak+ ( !  

mann] ( my life aft] ,i met ) a *ange1 b
 to describe all t ,i liv$ up "u1 w\ld  
be m ?an ,i c write at ?is "t4 ,b truly 
,i felt ,i _h come up out ( great       
tribulation1 & 0 wa%$ 9 ! blood ( !     
,lamb4 ,i _h atta9$ unto ! p[] ( ,*ri/'s
 resurrection1 my m9d be+ unbiass$ by   
any cre$ or doctr9e ( m54 ,:5 ,i 0      
conv]t$ ,i knew no?+ b ,jesus & him     
,crucifi$4  ,i arriv$ at my bro!r's t   
night ab\t #g o'clock4 ,i met 8 wife z  
usual4 ,aft] tea ,i retir$ to a room )  
my bro!r's wife1 tell+ h] ( my          
p]secutions1 & h[ ,god _h reveal$       
himself to me4 ,%e said %e ?\ght x 0    
wisdom 9 ,god n to reveal 8 glory to u  
:ile "h 9 ! body4 ,%e _h felt s mu* !   
glory ( ,god 9 h] own s\l t %e _h be5   
almo/ ov]p[]$4 ,%e ?\ght t ,god _h no?+ 
m = me to d4 ,:at does su* language     
imply8 ,is !re a p]son ?is side ( !     
grave = :om ,god has no?+ m to d8 ,b ,i 
did n "k !n t man _h ! k to take ! holy 
_s f a p]son by giv+ !m m$ic9e2 b %e _h 
already conceiv$ ! wick$ de$ 9 h] he>t1 

& knew :]e ! awful crime c\ld be done1 &
 h] v language express$ :at %e knew 0   
ab\t to be done to me1 al?\gh ,i did n  
!n suspect any evil4 ,_h x be5 said to  
me 9 any o!r place b a bro!r's h\se1 &  
by a female1 ,i %\ld h suspect$ ,i 0    
ab\t to be murd]$1 or "s o!r brutal     
outrage committ$ ^u me4 ,if ,i _h be5   
among ! rude b>b>ians ,i %\ld n h be5 s 
easily deceiv$2 b ,i look$ up to a si/] 
to d = me1 & ask$ h] to let me /ay ) h]1
 & ,i w\ld sew or d any ?+ = h]2 b %e   
appe>$ to be v angry ) me e "t t ,i     
spoke ab\t :at ,god _h done = me4 ,i    
said b little to any "o :5 ,i retir$1 = 
si/] ,nancy & ,sophia1 bro!r ,/eph5's   
wife1 w5t ) me into my room4 ,9 my usual
 mann] be=e ,i laid my head ^u my pill[1
 ,i knelt by my b$ & sil5tly (f]$ my    
pray] to ,god4 ,my si/] ,nancy said see 
t1 & ,sophia answ]$ ,i am sorry to see  
x4 ,i said no?+1 b ?\ght x v /range t 9 
?is *ri/ian l& any "o %\ld be sorry to  
see ano!r on _! b5d$ knees be=e an holy 
,god1 & especially "o t knew me s well z

 a si/]4 ,i slept s\nd all knight1 &    
felt mu* refre%$ 9 ! morn+1 & happy t ,i
 _h got away f a h\se :]e ,i _h be5 s   
p]secut$4 ,h[ little did ,i "k :]e ,i 0 
to be c>ri$1 & :at 0 ab\t to be done to 
me4 ,o1 ,,t ,a ,,dagg] ,,_h ,,be5       
,,plung$ ,,into ,,my ,,he>t ,,9 ,,!     
,,midnight ,,h\r1 = :at ,i h suff]$ "h  
is beyond ! p[] ( language to describe4 
,& !n e s\rce ( happ9ess is tak5 f me "h
 & h]eaft]1 to be =ev] torm5t$ 9 fire4  
,x may be look$ ^u z d]angem5t or       
delusion1 b z true z !re is a ,god t    
sitte? ^u 8 et]nal ?rone1 s true ?is    
awful crime has be5 done to me2 & let   
any "o reasonably look ^u ! treatm5t t  
,i receiv$1 x w %[ x 0 no?+ b a _s ( !  
vile/ p]secution4 ,b my wick$ relations 
t hat$ me )\t a cause are scre5$ f ! law
 ( our c\ntry1 & 9 "p f public c5sure1  
toge!r ) ! ,doctors2 & x may be ?r[n    
back ^u me t ,i am a poor d]ang$ p]son2 
b ,god only kn[s ! di/ress t my body is 
e mom5t 91 & !n t ,i nev] c be reliev$4 
,w$nesday1 ! #bd?1 ,i pass$ z ,i usually

 did :ile on a visit to my bro!r's1 n   
suspect+ t !y 7 look+ ^u me z a d]ang$  
p]son1 & above all1 kn[+ t horrid crime 
c\ld be done to me & plunge me into     
ev]la/+ mis]y1 a poor innoc5t1          
unprotect$ si/]1 t _h toil$ late & e>ly 
to get along4 ,?ursday1 #be? ,nov41     
,?anksgiv+ day ( #ahdj1 ,i arose1 took  
breakfa/1 & f\nd bro!r ,/eph5's wife 9  
b$ ) ! sick head-a*e4 ,! girls all seem$
 to be engag$1 & ,i1 ( c\rse1 9 my way  
to d = ! sick :]ev] ,i 01 wait$ ^u h]4  
,bro!r ,eb51 wife & *ildr5 _h come 9 to 
pass ! day1 f ,jamaica ,pla94 ,i began  
to play ) !m1 z ,i always did2 b ,i     
obs]v$ !y did n greet me ) t            
affectionate livel9ess !y 7 accu/om$ to4
 ,i took no notice ( x to let !m "k x4  
,ab\t #aj o'clock1 :ile ,i sat at my "w 
9 ! p>l\r1 my bro!r ,/eph5 came 9 & ask$
 me to g to a ride ) him4 ,?is surpris$ 
me1 z our bro!rs 7 nev] v att5tive to _!
 si/]s2 b ,i ?\ght he piti$ me on acc\nt
 ( my tr\bles1 kn[+ ! life t ,i _h tri$ 
to live4 ,i told him ,i did n c>e ab\t  

go+ to ride1 z x 0 n my heal?1 b my     
spiritual life :i* he did n und]/&1 &   
ask$ him to let me /ay ) ,sophia1 & ,i  
w\ld sew or d any ?+ = !m2 he said he   
want$ me to g & see a physician4 ,i told
 him x 0 n a physician t ,i wi%$ to see1
 ,i %\ld r see "s m9i/]1 :o w\ld bett]  
und]/& my situation4 ,he said ,i %\ld n 
see any "o4 ,i !n ask$ him to let me see
 ,mr4 ,w9sl[1 8 own m9i/]1 z ,i always  
lik$ him v mu*1 z he is a v spiritual   
m9d$ man4 ,he said no1 ,i %\ld n see    
him4 ,he said ! ,doctor 0 a pi\s man4 ,i
 ask$ :at *ur* he belong$ to2 he answ]$ 
,mr4 ,w9sl['s4 ,i !n said1 well1 ,i w g 
& see him1 ?9k+ x w\ld d no h>m4 ,^u t1 
he said ) a great degree ( triumphant   
feel+1 t's ! place = su* ones z y are4  
,c\ld a bro!r embue 8 h&s 9 ! blood ( a 
si/]'s et]nal life1 to take ! advantage 
( h] weakness1 put h] "u locks & keys1 &
 hire m5 to d ! awful crime2 & is !re   
su* a h\se :]e ?is crime c be done &    
tol]at$1 by ! public uphold+ m5 t are   
will+ to be hir$ to d ! greate/ ( all   

crimes1 & poor be+s _c help !mselves1   
nor any k9d fri5d get to !m to protect  
!m8 ,is ?is done 9 ?is free & happy l&8 
,because ,i diff]$ f "s ( my family 9 my
 religi\s op9ion mu/ ,i be tak5 &       
imprison$8 ,b if t 0 all1 ,i w\ld n     
notice x any m ?an ,i ev] did all _!    
previ\s unk9d treatm5t4--,i _h always   
done = myself f ! "t t ,i 0 9 my #ae?   
ye>1 & receiv$ no assi/ance f any "o ( !
 family1 & _h endeavor$ to support a    
good "*1 al?\gh ,i 0 call$ to walk 9 !  
humble walks ( life1 & _h (t5 met ) !   
cold neglect ( ! ri* & popul> class ( ! 
_w because ,i 0 a poor factory girl4 ,my
 bro!rs _h nev] (f]$ to d = me or to    
help me along4 ,ea* "o ( u _h to d =    
ourselves2 b !y might h treat$ me )     
common humanity4 ,i nev] ?\ght labor    
di%onor$ any "o1 b :ile ,i 0 on a visit 
to see my bro!r ,/eph51 8 wife reque/$  
me n to let any "o "k t ,i work$ 9 a    
factory1 :i* made me v unhappy2 &       
because ,i w5t to ,great ,falls to "w 9 
! factory1 bro!r ,/eph5 s5t my ?+s 9 a  

fictiti\s "n1 n wi%+ any "o to "k t he  
_h a si/] t work$ 9 ! factory1 :i* caus$
 me to be suspect$ ( be+ a loose "*4 ,i 
0 only 9 my #ai? ye>1 & a /rang] to e "o
 9 ! place4--,god only kn[s :at ,i _h to
 live up "u4 ,b ,i said no?+ to any "o  
ab\t x1 only to my olde/ si/]1 ,m>y1 z  
all my tr\bles ,i confid$ 9 h]2 b to    
return to my subject4 ,soon z my bro!r  
left ! room1 ,i w5t into ,sophia's room 
& told h] :at my bro!r _h said4 ,%e aga9
 said %e ?\ght ,god _h no?+ m = me to d2
 b :at %e meant ,i did n "k4--,aft]     
d9n]1 bro!r ,/eph5 came into ! room &   
said1 n[ ,elizabe? we w h t ride t we   
spoke (4 ,i w5t & prep>$ myself1 b aga9 
,i w5t & talk$ ) ,sophia1 ,i told h] x  
w\ld d no good to g & see a physician1 =
 !y knew no?+ ab\t spirituality1 & x    
w\ld injure ! cause ( ,god4 ,%e said1 ,o
 no1 ,god has no?+ m = y to d2 get y\r  
heal? & ,i w come & see y 9 two or ?ree 
days4 ,i 0 n expect+ to /op1 b w\ld g & 
see ! ,doctor because ,i c\ld n cont5d  
any m4 ,aft] ,i got into ! *aise ) my   

bro!r1 ,i began to reason ) him ^u !    
fooli%ness ( go+ to see a physician4 ,he
 said x 0 a "y ladies' bo>d+ place & !  
,doctor 0 a pi\s man1 & ,i c\ld h any ?+
 t ,i want$4 ,i told him ,i ?\ght x v   
fooli% to ?r[ away s mu* money1 z our   
p>5ts 7 poor4 ,bett] d good ) x1 = ,i   
knew :at ! _w 02 !y c>$ = no?+ if !y    
c\ld b get money1 & ,i did n wi% to be  
among /rang]s4 ,he w\ld n h>k5 to :at ,i
 said1 b said he 0 will+ to pay my bo>d 
?ree or six mon?s1 or long]1 & t's !    
place = su* ones z ,i 04 ,if ,i _h be5 a
 di/urb] ( ! peace ( any community or   
family1 well he might h said s2 b !n we 
h laws 9 ?is c\ntry1 by :i* a p]son may 
be tri$1 & made to suff] ! p5alty ( !   
law !y break4 ,i 0 non-resi/ant4 ,i said
 e ?+ t ,i c\ld say4 ,aft] we arriv$ !re
 ,i 0 introduc$ to ,dr4 ,bell1 9 8      
p>l\r4 ,he ask$ me to relate my *ri/ian 
exp]i5ce4 7,i wi% ! read] to m>k ! mann]
 9 :i* ! doctor address$ me1 = :at has a
 physician to d ) a p]son's *ri/ian     
exp]i5ce87 ,9 my usual mann] ,i ask$ him

 if he _h a *ange ( he>t8 ,he said yes1 
to avoid an argum5t1 ,i told him ,i nev]
 argu$ or disput$ ab\t religion4 ,he    
said !n he _h n :at ! _w call$ a *ange4 
,i told him !n he mu/ excuse me f say+  
any ?+ ab\t my *ri/ian exp]i5ce1 z he   
w\ld n und]/& x4 ,my bro!r began to urge
 me toge!r ) ! ,doctor4 ,i did n "k :y  
,i mu/ relate my *ri/ian exp]i5ce to a  
,doctor & an unconv]t$ man at su* a "t1 
= x seem$ to me l mock]y4 ,i refus$ aga9
 & aga91 b1 no1 ,i mu/ relate x4 ,be+ no
 long] able to )/& ^! entreaties ,i told
 :at ,god _h done = me to t "t4 ,spoke (
 be+ b\nd 9 ! _s & ,i felt a bondage (  
s\l4 ,he said he c\ld give me some?+ to 
relieve t bondage ( s\l & be+ b\nd 9 !  
_s4 ,i told him ,i %\ld r be ) my own   
folks & ,i %\ld r n /op4 ,^u t my bro!r 
& ! ,doctor bo? began to urge me        
vehem5tly & said ,i _h no respect to any
 "o's judgm5t4 ,i _h always provid$ =   
myself1 & :y ,i %\ld be s urg$ to /ay at
 a bo>d+ place :5 ,i did n wi% to1 ,i   
did n "k2 & ,i told ! ,doctor ,i did n  

"k :at he _h to d ) my s\l4 ,b !y bo?   
said s mu* ,i told !m ,i w\ld /ay1 z e  
?+ 9 ! room indicat$ respectability4 ,!y
 w5t out ( ! room1 & :ile !y 7 gone ,i  
?\ght x 0 no place = me1 ?9k+ x 0 a     
ladies' bo>d+ place among ! popul>      
class1 & 0 n ! place = a *ri/ian 9 su* a
 weak /ate4 ,i w5t out & ask$ my bro!r  
to take me back ) him4 ,he seem$ to be s
 angry ) me he c\ld h>dly control 8     
feel+4 ,he put 8 h& ^u my %\ld] & gave  
me a pu%1 & said he c\ld n c>ry me back1
 b w\ld come & see me ! next day2 ,i !n 
return$ into ! p>lor & began to take (f 
my ?+s :5 a tall1 black ey$1 mascul9e   
look+ female came & took me by ! arm &  
ask$ me if %e %\ld wait ^u me up /airs4 
,i ?ank$ h] & walk$ up /airs ) h]1 ?9k+ 
%e 0 go+ to %[ me my sleep+ room4 ,%e   
wait$ ^u me into a long pa9t$ gall]y )  
sleep+ rooms on bo? sides1 & %e left !  
room4 ,!re 7 a numb] ( ladies sitt+     
ar\nd 9 ! gall]y4 ,i w5t to ! w9d[ to   
take a view ( ! prospect1 & ! iron grate
 met my eye4 ,i turn$ to a lady & ask$  

h] if %e w\ld in=m me :at ^? iron grates
 7 at ! w9d[ =4 ,%e made me no reply4 ,i
 turn$ to ano!r & ask$ h]1 & %e made no 
reply1 b rose & w5t into h] room4 ,i    
ask$ h] p>don1 ,i did n int5d any (f5ce1
 ,i 0 a /rang] !re4 ,i !n w5t to ! door 
to g d[n into ! p>lor :]e ,i came out2 b
 ,i f\nd ! door lock$4 ,^u t ,i made !  
expression grat$ w9d[s1 & lock$ door1   
:]e am ,i8 ,^u t1 a female /epp$ out (  
h] room4 ,i p]ceiv$ %e 0 n su* a p]son z
 ,i _h ought to be ) at t "t4 ,%e took  
me by wai/ & said !y 7 k9d folks !re4 ,i
 ask$ h] :]e ,i 01 & wi%$ to see ! lady 
( ! h\se1 & ask$ h] to let me alone2 b  
no "o w\ld give me any answ]4 ,ab\t d>k 
! bell rung to call ! ladies d[n to tea4
 ,a v mode/ "y lady came out ( h] room &
 ask$ me if %e %\ld walk ) me d[n to    
tea4 ,i ?ank$ h]1 & ,i 0 wait$ ^u d[n   
into a l>ge room :]e !re 0 a l>ge table 
set ) all k9ds ( refre%m5ts4 ,! company 
pres5t$ a /range appe>ance1 ! peculi>ity
 ( _! dress1 & _m ?+s did n look "r4 ,i 
wond]$ h[ my bro!r came to place me     

among su* creatures1 9 my weak /ate4 ,i 
drank a cup ( tea & left ! room1 ?9k+ x 
0 no place = me1 = ,i _h longs9ce left  
balls & p>ties1 & sc5es ( mir?fulness4  
,miss ,b>b]1 ! same "o t _h wait$ ^u me 
up into ! gall]y1 ask$ me :]e ,i 0 go+4 
,i told h] ,i wi%$ to retire to my room4
 ,%e wait$ on me up into ! same gall]y4 
,i w5t into "o ( ! rooms & knelt d[n &  
ask$ ,god to deliv] me f t place1 & to  
return me to ! p ( ,god4 ,soon ,m>y     
,brigham1 ! att5dant1 came into !       
gall]y1 ,i ask$ h] _m que/ions to f9d   
out :]e ,i 01 & :at k9d ( bo>d]s !y kept
 !re2 b %e w\ld make me no reply4 ,i    
ask$ h] if ! h\rly w5t into ,bo/on f    
!re1 b %e made me no reply3 %e _h ! m>ks
 ( a me?odi/4 ,i ?\ght if %e lov$ ,god1 
if ,i talk$ ( ! love ( ,god1 ,i %\ld    
draw h] t[>ds me4 ,i told h] h[ ,i lov$ 
,god1 & said _m ?+s ab\t sanctification1
 b %e made me no reply4 ,i ?\ght ?is 0 v
 /range treatm5t4 ,i !n ask$ h] = some?+
 to take4 ,%e said ! ,doctor nev] gave  
any?+ "u two days4 ,i told h] x 0       

necess>y1 & t ,i want$ "s val]ian tea2 b
 %e said ,i c\ld n h any ?+ t night1 &  
:5 ! bell rang n9e1 %e said x 0 ! h\r = 
! ladies to retire4 ,i w5t to my room & 
ask$ ,miss ,brigham if my door fa/5$2 %e
 said yes4 ,i ask$ h] = ! key2 %e said  
%e lock$ ! door & kept ! key4 ,aft] ,i  
_h retir$ %e came into my room & took my
 clo!s out4 ,i ask$ h] :at t 0 =2 %e    
said x 0 ! rule ( ! h\se1 & %e lock$ me 
9 alone4 ,i did n sleep any all night1 f
 ! excitem5t ( ! day1 & wond]+ :at my   
bro!r %\ld place me ) su* *>act]s =4 ,i 
came to ! conclusion t x 0 a place :]e  
females ( ill-fame bo>d$1 ) physicians  
to get help 9 "t ( tr\ble4 ,9 ! morn+ :5
 ,m>y ,brigham came & unlock$ my door1  
,i told h] ,i _h n slept any all        
night4--,%e said1 well1 t's no?+4 ,i    
ask$ h] to let me see ! ,doctor z soon z
 possible1 = ,i wi%$ to return 9 ! fir/ 
h\rly4 ,%e made me no reply4 ,i rose &  
w5t to ! upp] end ( ! gall]y & ask$     
,miss ,brigham to excuse me f go+ to !  
table1 z my dress 0 n adju/$1 & _h n    

br\ght my combs & hair bru% ) me1 & ask$
 h] to let me h a cup ( c(fee !re4 ,%e  
?rew a hair comb into my lap & comm&$ me
 to come to ! table2 ^u :i* ,i adju/$ my
 dress z soon z possible & w5t to !     
table4 ,e ?+ pres5t$ a /range appe>ance4
 ,great t9 lid pots & a wood5 wait] &   
brok5 di%es4 ,a plate ( crack]s set on !
 end ( ! table :]e ,i sat2 ,i w5t to    
take "o1 & "o ( ! ladies spoke & said !y
 7 h]s1 b ,i might h "o2 ,i ask$ h] to  
excuse me1 & took a piece ( bread4 ,aft]
 breakfa/ ,i w5t to g into my room1 z ,i
 _h n slept any all night1 & f\nd my    
door lock$2 ,i w5t & sat d[n & ask$ if  
!re 0 any *ri/ians !re1 :5 "o lady said 
%e 0 a bapti/1 & %e knew a ,m>y ,/one 9 
,bo/on4 ,i told h] x 0 my si/]4 ,i ask$ 
h] to be my fri5d1 & %e said %e w\ld1 & 
t ,i might lay d[n 9 h] room4 ,accord+ly
 %e w5t into h] room ) me & cov]$ me up 
9 h] b$ & %ut ! door2 j z ,i _h got into
 a sweet sleep1 ,m>y ,brigham came 9 &  
ord]$ me up4 ,i rose & ask$ h] to let me
 lay d[n 9 my room1 z ,i _h n slept any 

all night4--,%e said ! ladies 7 n all[$ 
to lay d[n 9 ! day "t4 ,"o ( ! ladies   
told me to ask ! sup]visor to let me h  
my room door op54 ,:at x meant to h a   
sup]visor 9 a ladies' bo>d+ h\se ,i knew
 n2 b :5 %e came 9 ,i f\nd x 0 ! same "o
 t _h wait$ ^u me into ! gall]y4 ,i ask$
 h] to be my fri5d1 & told h] %e did n  
"k h[ ,i did love ,god2 %e said %e w\ld 
be my fri5d1 b %e did n want any silly  
fancies4 ,:at %e meant ,i did n "k1 = ,i
 did n "k !re 0 any fancy ab\t          
*ri/ianity4 ,i ask$ h] if ,i c\ld h a   
b[l ( val]ian tea & h my door op5 to lay
 d[n4 ,%e said yes1 & told ,m>y ,brigham
 to op5 my door2 j z ,i _h got into a   
sleep aga91 ,m>y ,brigham & ,miss ,b>b] 
came & ?rew (f ! clo!s4 ,i be+ weak &   
excit$ got up & ask$ if my bro!r _h     
come1 = he said he w\ld come & see me ! 
next day4 ,i want$ to get ) "s "o t knew
 me1 = su* treatm5t z ?is ,i did n "k   
:at to make (4 ,miss ,b>b] imm$iately   
left ! room & !y w\ld give me no answ]4 
,i w5t to my room to lay d[n1 b f\nd my 

door lock$ & ,i c\ld n h ! privilege (  
lay+ d[n aga9 t day4 ,ab\t #aa o'clock  
,dr4 ,fox1 ! assi/ant physician1 came 9 
& began to conv]se ) me2 ,i told him x 0
 n my reason t 0 effect$1 or any di/ress
 ( m9d1 b ,i _h und]gone a cleans+ or   
purify+ by be+ wa%$ 9 ! blood ( ! ,lamb2
 t ,i _h ta/$ ( ! good ^w1 & ! p[]s ( ! 
_w to come1 & t ,i 0 weak & want$ "s    
val]ian tea1 or some?+ to calm me2 he   
said t ,i mu/ n ?9k ,i 0 s fill$ ) ! _s2
 any m9i/] w\ld laugh at me4 ,i repeat$ 
"s passages ( ! ,scriptures to him2 "o 0
 t ,/4 ,paul says1 ,be ye fill$ ) !     
fullness ( ,god4 ,he said x 0 because   
,/4 ,paul saw ! ,"l ,jesus4 ,i told him 
t made no diff]5ce1 all _h got to g !   
same way to heav52 t ,i /ood ^u !       
,gospel1 b ,i nev] disput$ ab\t         
religion4 ,he said he w\ld give me      
some?+ to calm & /r5g!n me2 b no?+ 0    
br\ght me until night1 nor did my bro!r 
come to see me4 ,aft] ,i _h retir$1 ,m>y
 ,brigham came into my room & said %e _h
 got "s m$ic9e = me4 ,i rose up & took  

x1 ?9k+ x 0 some?+ to d me good4 ,x 0 a 
pill & a little mug ( mixture1 & ,m>y   
,brigham w5t out & lock$ ! door2 b ,o1  
alas h[ little did ,i "k :]e ,i 0 & :at 
,i 0 put into t h\se =4 ,su* a crime ,i 
nev] read (1 & x is cov]$ up "u ! g>b ( 
d]angem5t1 & ,i am ! poor suff]]4 ,z    
soon z ,i took x ,i 0 ?r[n into mo/     
viol5t pa9 & di/ress1 beyond ! p[] (    
language to describe1 nei!r c ,i give   
any "o an adequate idea4 ,! m$ic9e      
effect$ my bra91 ! back "p ( my head1   
h>d5$ or petrifi$ x1 & ! bra9 is ! seat 
( ! n]ves1 & any "o c conceive ( !      
di/ress t ,i mu/ be ?r[n into all ov] 9 
my body1 e n]ve 9 me draw+ & /ra9+      
convulsively4 ,sometimes ,i 0 almo/     
drawn back d\ble & !n =w>d1 roll+ 9 ! b$
 f "o side to ! o!r 9 ! greate/ agony4  
,:5 my door 0 unlock$ 9 ! morn+ ,i rose4
 ,i _h wept bitt]ly all night4 ,! ?\ghts
 ( my situation1 & = s /range a ?+ z x  
may appe>1 t m$ic9e c be giv5 to de/roy 
! "w ( ,grace 9 a p]son1 ev5 s x c be   
done1 & ,dr4 ,bell & ,dr4 ,fox bo?      

possess t k ( giv+ m$ic9e to accompli%  
?is awful outrage ^u ,*ri/ianity2 & x is
 done "u ! g>b ( d]angem5t1 & !y are    
scre5$ f public c5sure1 & x is a great] 
crime ?an t !y _h tortur$ me to dea? any
 way t ,i ev] read (4 ,z ,i come out (  
my room a "y lady ask$ me :at made me   
weep2 s ,i took h] h& & ask$ h] to tell 
me :]e ,i 01 & :at k9d ( p ,i 0 )4 ,%e  
ask$ me if ,i did n "k1 & ,i told h] no4
 ,%e !n told me t ,i 0 9 ! ,insane      
,assylum4 ,i !n knew t ,i 0 betray$ into
 ! h&s ( ! wick$ to be de/roy$4 ,i told 
h] t ! m$ic9e t !y _h giv5 me 0 kill+ ! 
_s ( ,*ri/ 9 me2 & t ,i 0 lo/4 ,i began 
to lose all idea ( hol9ess4 ,b ,i knew x
 w\ld be cov]$ up "u ! g>b ( d]angem5t1 
& !n ,i recollect$ :at my bro!r ,/eph5's
 wife said1 t ,god _h no?+ m = me to d4 
,( c\rse1 if any "o has n ! _s ( ,*ri/1 
!y _c s]ve ,god4 ,x is n only a belief1 
b !y mu/ h ! _s4 ,dr4 ,fox came 9 ab\t  
#aj o'clock2 :ile ,i 0 lay+ on ! b$ he  
/ood look+ at me1 ) ,miss ,b>b]4 ,my    
jaws 7 unlock$4 ,he made ! rem>k to     

,miss ,b>b] t he did n "k :e!r x 0 !    
fulfillm5t ( ! prophecy1 !re %all be    
kna%+ ( ! tee?1 or :e!r x 0 halloo+     
glory to ,god1 s mu*4 ,oh1 h[ little !y 
knew ( ! reason ( my los+ my ballance4  
,x 0 my ex]t+ myself s mu* aft] ,i _h   
become a spiritual be+1 hav+ no k9d     
fri5d to d = me4 ,b ,i said no?+2 ,i    
ask$ = ! privilege ( writ+1 :i* 0       
grant$4 ,i wrote to bro!r ,/eph5's wife1
 & ask$ h] to come & see me t aft]noon1 
z soon z %e got ! lett]1 = ,i c\ld n    
believe t a female c\ld be accessory to 
su* a crime1 al?\gh ,i well recollect h[
 angry %e appe>$ to be e "t ,i spoke (  
:at ,god _h done = me4 ,! ,doctor said  
he w\ld s5d x4 ,t day1 ,saturday1 pass$ 
away )\t br++ any "o to see me4 ,i ?\ght
 ( my k9d *ri/ian fri5ds1 my lov$ fri5d 
,nancy ,sanborn2 b n[ =ev] sep>at$ f h]1
 no m c\ld we fondly anticipate go+ to !
 f> ,we/ toge!r1 to be ! in/rum5ts1 9 ! 
h&s ( ,god1 ( exp&+ ! immortal m9d 9 k1 
& tea* ! way ( salvation to poor s9n]s4 
,b n[ tak5 by ! cunn+ craft9ess ( my    

relations1 ,i 0 enclos$ )9 bolt$ doors &
 grat$ w9d[s1 :]e ,i c\ld n make my     
escape1 nor my fri5ds prev5t ! brutal   
outrage t !y 7 committ+ ^u me4--,read]1 
= a mom5t imag9e y\rself 9 my situation4
 ,if y are n a *ri/ian y d n wi% to     
und]go pa91 nei!r d y desire to be      
mis]able1 nor to be sep>at$ f y\r       
fri5ds1 ) entire /rang]s t y nev] saw   
be=e1 = x is contr>y to ! laws t ,god   
has writt5 9 y\r nature4 ,b ,i 0 a poor 
factory girl1 )\t any ri* fa!r to       
protect me1 or pi\s "m to plead my      
cause1 & ,i c\ld say ) ,david1 ,i 0 an  
ali5 f my "m's womb1 to my "m's *ildr51 
& 9 my weakness !y sprang ^u me4 ,!y    
w\ld n let my *ri/ian fri5ds d = me1    
nei!r w\ld !y d = me !mselves4 ,i _h    
fri5ds t w\ld h gladly done = me2 long &
 de> acqua9tances1 bo? *ri/ians &       
unconv]t$1 :o w\ld h op5$ _! doors to me
 be=e !y w\ld h se5 me ! ?ird day ( my  
illness turn$ out ( doors by ,miss      
,lufk91 9 my weakness1 because ,i wi%$  
to s]ve ,god 9 _s & 9 tru?1 accord+ to  

my pr(ession1 & c>ri$ (f into a hospital
 or a devil's d5 "h ^u e>?1 = ,i call ^!
 ,insane ,assylums no?+ less4 ,b x is n 
! imprisonm5t or ! cruel treatm5t t ,i  
receiv$ !re t ,i speak (1 = ,i w\ld h   
borne t )\t a murmur4 ,b x is ! m$ic9e  
!y gave me t rack$ & tortur$ & kill$ !  
_s ( ,*ri/ )9 me4 ,x is t _s t gives a  
p]son a hatr$ to s91 supports !m up "u  
any torture4 ,*ri/ian read]1 :atev] "n y
 may be>1 x is y & y only t c truly feel
 = my di/ress$ situation1 deceiv$ into t
 h\se 9 su* an unlawful mann]1 ev5 if ,i
 _h be5 d]ang$4 ,i _h prop]ty1 & ,i     
ought to h _h a gu>dian appo9t$1 & k9d  
/eps tak5 ) me4 ,b to return to my      
subject3 a table 0 spread1 & a p>ty1 !  
,doctor be+ "o ( ! numb]1 sat d[n to    
play c>ds4 ,! mo/ unqualifi$ language   
came out ( _! m\?s4 ,i c\ld he> ! groans
 ( ! di/ress$ all ar\nd me1 "s weep+ to 
see _! fri5ds1 "s = "o ?+1 & "s = ano!r2
 & ,i 9 ! mo/ awful di/ress1 )\t "o k9d 
fri5d to speak to me2 an involunt>y     
groan came ) my brea?4 ,aga9 ! m$ic9e 0 

br\ght to me2 ,i told ! att5dant x 0    
de/roy+ me1 h>d5+ my bra91 & tak+ ! _s (
 ,*ri/ f me2 %e said ,i mu/ take x4 ,i  
did n "k :at to d1 ,i c\ld n help       
myself2 to resi/ ,i knew w\ld n d1 & yet
 hav+ p>tly ! _s ( ,*ri/1 :i* is        
non-resi/ant1 ,i took x1 :i* increas$ my
 di/ress4 ,i 0 aga9 lock$ into my room &
 left to weep & roll 9 my b$ all knight1
 ?9k+ ( my de> fri5ds1 n relations4--,b 
oh1 !y w\ld n h d>$ to h done ! crime   
out ( t h\se1 "u ! pret5ce ( insanity1  
to scre5 my wick$ relations1 t h be5    
inc5s$ aga9/ me ev] s9ce ,i met ) a     
*ange ( he>t4 ,sunday morn+ came1 & ?us1
 9 "o %ort week1 0 ,i br\ght to my sad  
fate1 = ! want ( a k9d *ri/ian fri5d to 
/ep 9 betwe5 me & my cruel p]secutors1 &
 wick$ tyranical relations4 ,?is day    
pass$ away2 ! m$ic9e 0 br\ght me to take
 twice a day1 pills & a little mug (    
mixture2 :at x 0 ,i d n "k1 b ,i ?9k ,i 
c\ld tell ! diff]5t k9ds t ,i took if ,i
 c\ld see !m4 ,monday1 #bi?1 pass$ away 
)\t any "o com+ to see me4 ,tuesday     

came1 & ,i aga9 ask$ ! privilege (      
writ+1 :i* 0 grant$4 ,i wrote to my     
bro!r ,s4 ask$ him to come & see me     
imm$iately1 z he promis$4 ,! ,doctor    
said he w\ld s5d x1 b ! day pass$ away  
)\t any "o com+4 ,my di/ress became m   
viol5t4 ,i told ! ,doctors !y 7 tak+ f  
me my et]nal happ9ess1 by tak+ f me ! _s
 ( ,*ri/4 ,i 0 in=m$ by "o ( ! pati5ts t
 !y did n s5d ! lett]s !y gave me lib]ty
 to write4 ,i conv]s$ ) ,dr4 ,fox ab\t  
my situation1 & ( ! k ( ?is m$ic9e1 & :y
 ! _w did n "k x4 ,he said t my bro!r   
knew all ab\t x be=e ,i 0 br\ght !re1 & 
:at ,i _h got to suff]1 & :at my        
situation w\ld be4 ,read]1 c y imag9e   
:at my suff]+s 78 ,no1 y _c4 ,if y _h   
witness$ !m y might h !n conceiv$ ( my  
dreadful agony4 ,tell+ ( my di/ress &   
lo/ condition1 ,i 0 mock$ & ridicul$4   
,?is week pass$ away4  ,sunday came     
aga91 ,dec4 #e4 ,no "o _h come to see   
me4 ,i 0 left mo/ly alone 9 ! gall]y4 ,!
 att5dant & "s ( ! pati5ts _h gone to   
meet+4 ,"o ( ! att5dants came 9 & talk$ 

) me2 %e spoke m k9d to me ?an any "o _h
 s9ce ,i come into ! h\se4 ,i told h] my
 situation1 & h[ ,i 0 a poor girl1 & _h 
f ! age ( #ae done = myself1 & _h nev]  
be5 sick1 or any exp5se to ! family or  
any o!r "o4 ,%e seem$ to express a deal 
( sympa?y = me4 ,%e said x 0 a h\se (   
di/ress4 ,i ask$ h] h[ long %e _h be5   
!re2 %e said1 ,i ?9k1 f six to eight    
ye>s4 ,%e said %e wi%$ %e _h se5 me :5  
,i fir/ _h be5 br\ght into t h\se4 ,i !n
 ask$ h] if %e knew t *ri/ians c\ld be  
de/roy$ !re4 ,%e seem$ n incl9$ to      
express h] m9d freely to me1 b said t %e
 _h be5 tri$ mu* 9 h] feel+s1 to see    
poor *ri/ians s tr\bl$ ab\t _! religion 
9 t h\se1 & if _! fri5ds knew :at 0 be/ 
= !m !y w\ld n br+ !m !re4 ,%e desir$ me
 to control my feel+s z mu* z possible4 
,if ,i did n1 ,i %\ld be %[]$4 ,i !n    
enquir$ :at t meant2 %e !n describ$ x to
 me1 t ,i %\ld be /ripp$ ( all my clo!s1
 & cold wat] p\r$ ^u me1 & ,i %\ld be   
c>ri$ on to ano!r gall]y1 :]e ! society 
w\ld n be s pleasant1 nei!r !           

accommodations s good4 ,i told h] t my  
di/ress 0 s great t x 0 impossible4 ,i  
!n ask$ h] h[ %e c\ld be kn[+ to su* a  
crime & n to make x kn[n to ! _w1 = x 0 
worse ?an murd]+ a p]son 9 ?is life4 ,%e
 said %e suppos$ my folks knew all ab\t 
x be=e ,i 0 br\ght !re1 b !y w\ld n be  
likely to tell me1 & %e bid me good bye4
 ,x seem$ good to h any "o speak k9d to 
me1 al?\gh ,i _h !n ne>ly lo/ all idea (
 hol9ess4 ,:5 %e left me1 ,i laid myself
 d[n ^u ! floor1 & wept bitt]ly2 ,i !n  
?\ght ,i w\ld make way ) myself1 = ,i 0 
betray$2 my relations _h at la/ v5t$ _! 
rev5ge ^u me1 & n[ ,i 0 an outca/ =ev]1 
& nev] m c\ld be happy4 ,i 0 n[ sep>at$ 
=ev] f my lov$ fri5ds4 ,i ?\ght ( a mu* 
lov$ fri5d1 ,phebe ,weir1 :o knew me    
be=e ,i 0 conv]t$1 "o t ,i us$ to talk  
mu* ) ab\t my spiritual life4 ,o1 t %e  
c\ld b behold me4--,soon !y return$ f   
meet+1 b to cease f weep+ & groan+1 0   
impossible1 = e n]ve 9 me 0 draw+ & tw++
 z ?\gh !y w\ld break4 ,*ri/ian read]1  
keep 9 m9d t ! _s ( ,*ri/ 0 kill$ 9 me1 

or ,i c\ld h bless$ & prais$ ,god1 amid/
 all ?is suff]+4 ,b ?is di/ress ( body 0
 caus$ by ! m$ic9e giv5 to me1 to take  
away ! _s ( ,*ri/4 ,x may appe> l       
d]angem5t1 b :at ,i tell y is ! tru?4   
,monday1 ,i _h endeavor$ to keep 9 my   
room z mu* z possible1 & to keep f      
groan+1 ?\gh x come volunt>y1 = ,i      
dread$ to be c>ri$ on to ano!r gall]y1  
expos$ & %[]$ ) cold wat]4 ,b my suff]+s
 w\ld n cease 9 ?is _w4 ,i c\ld n look  
=w>d to nev] end+ et]nity ( happ9ess1 = 
! idea ( love _h gone f me4 ,i nei!r    
lov$ ,god1 nor ?is _w4 ,my body 0 n[1 z 
x 71 dead2 my bra9 0 becom+ a m9]al     
sub/ance1 all b my intellectual         
faculties4 ,9 ! aft]noon1 ,miss ,b>b]   
came 91 9 h] mascul9e mann]1 to all     
appe>ance to exult 9 human mis]y1 & ask$
 me to take h] arm4 ,i knew ,i 0 go+ on 
to ano!r gall]y4 ,i said no?+1 = x w\ld 
be ( no use2 he>ts t are s h>d5$ 9      
cruelty z !y mu/ be to d su* crimes1    
w\ld n li/5 to entreaty4 ,accord+ly ,i 0
 l$ on to ano!r gall]y4 ,"h ,i f\nd     

p]fectly d]ang$ p1 & "s appe>$ to be 9 a
 great deal ( di/ress4 ,e/h] ,b5ton1 !  
att5dant1 at fir/1 0 q k9d to me1 b soon
 %e began to %[ h] p[]4 ,%e knew well my
 situation1 = %e _h se5 o!rs suff]      
simil>ly ab\t _! religion 9 t h\se1 & ,i
 0 reg>d$ z a vagabond1 z truly ,i am4  
,b w\ld ,i h will+ly ?r[n myself away8  
,is x n a law 9 nature t e body desires 
happ9ess8 ,b alas1 = ! want ( a k9d     
fri5d1 ,i am lo/ to all happ9ess "h &   
h]eaft]4 ,i _c enjoy c>nal nor spiritual
 ?+s4 ,i /ay$ 9 ?is gall]y ab\t a week1 
:5 ,miss ,b>b] came 9 "o morn+ & said ,i
 mu/ g d[n 9 ! o!r gall]y if ,i cri$ s4 
,i told h] to c>ry me1 = x 0 ! place ( !
 greate/ cruelty t ,i ev] knew4 ,h[ !y  
c\ld witness a poor female suff] z ,i   
did1 & to be accessory to x1 ,i ?\ght ( 
all ! cruelty ,i ev] read ( ,i nev] read
 ( any equal to ?is4 ,%e l$ me d[n among
 p]fect maniacs1 9 a cold1 d>k1 *e]less 
room1 ) no seat to sit on4 ,aga9 ,i     
talk$ ) ,dr4 ,fox1 & told him t my bro!r
 told me x 0 a "y ladies' bo>d+ h\se1 & 

! ,doctor 0 a pi\s man1 & ,i expect$ to 
be tak5 "u a ,godly influ5ce1 in/ead (  
be+ torn to pieces 9 ?is mann]1 by      
m$ic9e4 ,i ?\ght et]nal life 0 ( m      
importance ?an ?is life1 & we ought to  
seek ! s\l's salvation ( ea* o!r4 ,he   
said1 !y did n d su* ?+s !re1 x 0 a     
place to get heal?1 & he laugh$ at me = 
com+ !re4 ,i told him he might try to   
keep x cov]$ up "u ! g>b ( d]angem5t1 b 
,i believ$ x w\ld yet be expos$1 al?\gh 
,i 0 ! poor suff]]4 ,he said bo? male & 
female _h suff]$ x be=e me1 & w\ld n    
publi% x because x w\ld be look$ ^u z   
d]angem5t1 & no "o w\ld believe x4 ,i !n
 ask$ him if hol9ess 0 liable to become 
a disease & m$ical m5 knew x1 ought !y n
 to publi% x to ! _w t e ?+ %\ld be done
 = a p]son fir/ by ! p ( ,god1 be=e !   
m$ic9e 0 giv5 to !m1 & _h su* a crime   
ought to g "u ! g>b ( d]angem5t1 & poor 
creatures suff] =ev] 9 consequ5ce ( x4  
,he seem$ to ?9k x 0 a v light ?+1 &    
laugh$ at me & said ,i _h pray$ too mu*4
 ,?is is ,dr4 ,fox1 a memb] ( !         

congregational *ur*4 ,is ?is n worse ?an
 any crime t ev] 0 practis$ ^u a poor   
helpless creature 9 any place (         
wick$ness ^u ! face ( ! e>?4 ,i f\nd !  
att5dant1 ,mrs4 ,em]son1 v k9d to me    
uni=mly1 9 ?is gall]y1 & %e (t5 spoke ( 
! cruel treatm5t ( t h\se4--,i /ay$ 9   
?is gall]y until ab\t ! #bf? ( ,dec41 :5
 ,miss ,b>b] came 9 & said t ,i mu/ g to
 ! cottage1 or x might m prop]ly be     
call$ a /one dungeon1 :]e !re are six   
cells1 & "s ( !m h a /raw b$4 ,! cell t 
,i occupi$ _h "o2 b oh1 !y might h %ut  
me up 9 a /one dungeon & made me fa/ 9 !
 /rap & buckle1 & ,i w\ld h prais$ ,god2
 b no1 ,i c\ld n pray to ,god1 my bra9 0
 l a m9]al sub/ance4 ,i 0 n[ enclos$ 9 a
 /one dungeon1 b ,i _h a k9d att5dant by
 ! "n ( ,s>ah ,br[n4 ,if ,i spoke ( my  
situation & ( ! sweets ( r$eem+ love1 ,i
 0 mock$ & laugh$ at by ! ,doctors1 &   
,miss ,b>b] seem$ to exult 9 my mis]y4  
,i (t5 plead to see "s ( my relations1  
especially bro!r ,/eph51 :o c>ri$ me    
!re1 b my reque/ !y refus$4 ,i (t5 spoke

 to ! ,tru/ees ab\t my situation & !    
mann] ( my life1 & h[ cruelly ,i 0      
deceiv$ into t h\se2 b say :at y w1 x is
 reg>d$ z d]angem5t by !m4 ,i _h be5 9  
?is /one dungeon ab\t ?ree or f\r days1 
,i come to ! conclusion t ,i _h no?+ to 
live =2 ,i 0 9 di/ress ( body1 f ! cr[n 
( my head to ! sole ( my foot4 ,i 0     
guilty ( ! blood ( ! cov5ant4 ,i n[ did 
n love ,god or ?is _w4 ,my le>n+ 0 n[   
tak5 f me1 t ,i _h labor$ h>d to        
acquire4 ,my good "n1 :i* is bett] ?an  
preci\s o9tm5t1 0 n[ gone4 ,i _h become 
an outca/ ( e>? & heav54 ,my food       
ta/eless2 ,i _h no long] any object to  
pursue4 ,i accord+ly made up my m9d to  
take my life t night4 ,= t purpose ,i   
tore a piece ( ! %eet (f4 ,i !n ?\ght ( 
my h>d labors & /riv+ to get along1 & my
 desire to set a bright example1 & :at  
_h x pr(it$ me1 t 9 my weakness ,i %\ld 
be tak5 & %ut up :]e no k9d fri5d c\ld  
approa* to save me f ! brutal outrage ( 
man4 ,i expect$ nev] aga9 to see any "o 
t ,i knew ^u e>?1 & t :ile "h ,i mu/ be 

among ! wor/ ( *>act]s4 ,! att5dant came
 9 & bid me good night4 ,i ?\ght %e 0 ! 
la/ human be+ ,i %\ld ev] see2 ,i _h got
 to g into hell's torm5t if ,i liv$2 &  
to live any long] ,i ?\ght !re 0 no use4
 ,i laid d[n ?9k+ ,i w\ld wait until all
 0 /ill4 ,ab\t #ab o'clock1 ,i judge1 ,i
 rose & walk$ up & d[n my cell1 ?9k+ t  
my life _h become a burd5 to me4 ,i     
?\ght ( my lov$ companions1 my lov$ ,new
 ,hampton tea*]s1 & t happy circle (    
acqua9tances1 & !n h[ cruelly ! cry _h  
be5 rais$ ab\t me ( be+ insane1 9 ord]  
to get me %ut up1 :]e ?is awful crime   
c\ld be done2 h[ cruelly ,c>ol9e ,damm]s
 _h inc5s$ my bro!r ,/eph5 agu9/ me1 a  
"y lady t ,i _h done s mu* =2 %e _h be5 
d[n 9 ! summ] & talk$ to my bro!r's     
folks ab\t my be+ s engag$ 9 behalf (   
poor s9n]s1 :i* 0 my meat & dr9k4 ,if x 
0 look$ ^u z d]angem5t1 x 0 some?+ t    
made me happy & x did n lead me to d    
evil1 b n[ ,i c\ld n commit myself to   
,god1 nei!r did ,i ?9k by putt+ an end  
to my life1 t ,i %\ld cease f "o /ate ( 

suff]+ & cruel tyranny4 ,i put ! /r+    
r\nd my neck1 & atta*$ x to a h+e ( !   
door4 ,i gave my weight to ! /r+1 &     
began to lose all s5se ( feel+1 ! la/ ,i
 knew2 ! fir/ ?+ ,i knew aga91 ,i f\nd  
myself lay+ on ! floor1 9 viol5t agony1 
h>dly kn[+ any?+4 ,h[ long ,i _h laid   
!re ,i "k n4 ,! sweat 0 p\r+ out ( me   
pr(usely4 ,at fir/ ,i c\ld n move1 b    
gradually come to4 ,i recollect$ :at ,i 
_h attempt$ to d1 & felt = ! /r+ & f\nd 
x _h brok51 & t 0 ! cause ( my lay+ on !
 floor4 ,i ?\ght ,i w\ld try ! second   
"t1 & made ! attempt1 b 0 s weak t ,i   
c\ld n manage4 ,i began to feel a viol5t
 pa9 9 my face1 f\nd my *9 0 badly cut1 
& ?\ght probably my jaw 0 brok51 = x    
hurt me to move x4 ,i lay$ d[n & ?\ght  
if x 0 brok5 x w\ld be less pa9ful to h 
x att5d$ to1 ?an to wait until morn+4 ,i
 call$ to ! att5dant1 ^: room 0 9 !     
corn] ( ! build+4 ,%e came 9 & ask$ me  
:at 0 ! matt]4 ,i feign$ ignorance4 ,%e 
said _! 0 a great deal ( blood ^u !     
floor1 & t my *9 0 badly hurt4 ,%e call$

 ,miss ,b>b]1 !y exam9$ & f\nd x n      
brok52 w5t out & left me alone aga9 = ! 
night1 b ,i 0 s weak t ,i c\ld n attempt
 my life aga94 ,! next day ! m>k 0      
obs]v$ ^u my neck1 & x 0 suspect$ t ,i  
_h attempt$ to make way ) myself1 & !n  
,i _h ! lea!r muff put on4 ,b :at !y    
c\ld wi% to keep su* a mis]able suff]+  
creature alive =1 ,i did n "k1 b sev]al 
( ! att5dants advis$ me n to take my    
life1 b try to get out & publi% x to !  
_w4--,i told !m ,i w\ld1 = if o!rs _h   
publi%$ x be=e me1 ,i might h be5 sav$ f
 suff]+ "h & h]eaft]4 ,al?\gh my acc\nt 
0 seal$ ) ,god1 yet ,i rememb]$ ! sweets
 ( r$eem+ love1 & h[ good x 0 to pray to
 ,god2 b n[ ?r\gh ! in/rum5tality ( !   
wick$1 9 my weakness1 ,i mu/ suff] =ev]4
 ,b ! poor sons ( ,god t h suff]$ ?is   
be=e me1 probably h tak5 _! lives1 =    
,dr4 ,fox says t he has exam9$ ! bodies 
( ^? t h _h ! holy _s tak5 away f !m1 z 
,i h1 & says ! organs are ! same1 only  
!y are contract$4 ,i /ay$ 9 ! dungeon   
until ! mon? ( ,m>*1 weep+ & groan+ my  

h\rs away4 ,ab\t ! la/ ( ,m>* ,i 0 c>ri$
 back f ! dungeon to ! gall]y ,i left4  
,miss ,em]son 0 my att5dant4 ,! day ,i 0
 c>ri$ back 0 v cold1 & ,miss ,b>b]     
ord]$ me to be lock$ up 9 my room1 to   
ex]cise h] au?ority ov] me4 ,miss       
,em]son 0 a good nurse4 ,%e said x 0 too
 cold = me to be !re1 com+ out ( su* a  
w>m room z ! dungeon 04 ,%e w5t & ask$  
,miss ,b>b] to let me come out2 b no1 %e
 mu/ keep me lock$ up4 ,miss ,em]son    
came 9 & told me ,i _h bett] lay d[n1 = 
%e knew ! *ange ( air 0 too mu* = me1   
ev5 if ,i sat out 9 ! gall]y1 by !      
furnace1 = ?is gall]y is a cold         
com=tless place4 ,t[>ds night my di/ress
 increas$1 till x seem$ z ?\gh e bone 9 
me w\ld fall ap>t4 ,x seem$ z ?\gh my   
brea? w\ld leave my body4 ,miss ,em]son 
said %e has told ,miss ,b>b] h[ cold ,i 
01 b %e did n reg>d x4 ,b ,i 0 n ! only 
suff]] on acc\nt ( _! cruel treatm5t4   
,o!rs 7 suff]+ ! l 9 diff]5t ways4 ,i   
/ay$ 9 ?is gall]y till ab\t ! la/ (     
,july1 weep+ & roll+ on ! floor1 9 pa91 

n all[$ to lay on my b$1 & (t5 /ripp$ & 
%[]$1 z ,i 0 told ,i %\ld be1 z a       
puni%m5t = weep+1 because ,i 0 9        
di/ress1 & lo/ to et]nal happ9ess1 &    
depriv$ ( my lib]ty1 9 ! h&s ( tyrants4 
,"o day1 :ile ,i 0 lay+ on ! floor 9    
agony1 ,dr4 ,bell came 9 & said t bro!r 
,james _h be5 !re4 ,i ask$ him :at 0 !  
reason he did n let me see him1 & he    
said he did n wi% to see me2 he 0 glad  
,i 0 !re1 & wi%$ ,i _h be5 two ye>s     
be=e4 ,?is add$ d\ble grief1 & ,dr4     
,bell seem$ delight$ to tell me ( x1 to 
tantalize me1 & t he 0 s completely held
 up 9 8 cruelty4 ,i told him t ?is bro!r
 did n "k ! agony t ,i 0 91 = ,i did n  
?9k he c\ld h ! he>t to rejoice 9 my    
mis]y1 & to wi% ,i _h ?is brutal act    
done to me two ye>s be=e4 ,?is bro!r ,i 
_h done = m or less f a *ild2 he be+ !  
y\nge/1 ,i _h help$ pay 8 bo>d1 8       
tuition1 b\ght him books & clo!s1 & all 
! money t ,i _h1 ,i let him h to help   
him along2 & c\ld ?is be ! way he 0     
rew>d+ me = x8 ,9 ?is l& ( lib]ty :]e e 

"o has a "r to wor%ip ,god z !y please1 
mu/ he rise aga9/ me & worse ?an murd]  
me1 because ,i wor%ipp$ ,god contr>y to 
8 views4 ,he believes all w g to heav5  
:e!r !y h 9 !m ! hope ( glory or n4 ,b  
he has a "r to 8 belief4 ,my religion   
w\ld n h l$ me to be accessory to 8     
imprisonm5t1 & m especially to h m$ic9e 
giv5 him to rack & torture him4 ,"o day 
:5 ! tru/ees 7 !re1 ,i address$ ,mr     
,l[ell ab\t my situation2 he gave a     
li/5+ e>1 :5 ,dr4 ,bell /epp$ =w>d &    
said my physician said t ,i 0 a fit     
subject = ! h\se4 ,i told him ,i _h no  
physician1 = ,i nev] 0 sick b once 9 my 
life1 & t 0 two ye>s ago4 ,he said he _h
 a l9e f ,:eelock ,graves1 & "o f ,eld] 
,cole1 my m9i/]4 ,?is surpris$ me1 t a  
lead] ( ,god's p1 to lead !m out ( s91  
%\ld give a l9e = a poor girl to be     
c>ri$ into an ,insane ,assylum4 ,he knew
 my case1 & _h he>d me tell h[ ,god _h  
dealt ) me4 ,b ,i told ,dr4 ,bell ,i did
 n believe x1 al?\gh x gave him ! lie4  
,i believ$ ,eld] ,cole to be too good a 

man & fri5d to humanity to wi% to de/roy
 a "y girl's "* s mu* z to give a l9e = 
me to be c>ri$ into an ,insane ,assylum1
 ! ?ird day ( my leav+ my "w4 ,i ask$   
,mr4 ,l[ell to g & see my bro!r ,/eph52 
b x avail$ no?+1 = !y all und]/ood !    
iniquity ( t h\se4 ,i _h n se5 any "o   
s9ce ,i _h be5 !re t ,i ev] saw be=e1   
except+ a ,miss ,dutton1 t ,i met at    
,eld] ,hime's meet+ 9 ,bo/on1 :o 0 !re a
 private att5dant to a lady = a %ort "t4
 ,9 ! mon? ( ,may1 ,ca?>9e1 bro!r ,eb5's
 wife1 came to see me1 ,i told h] z mu* 
z possible :at ,i _h suff]$1 & h[       
de/roy$ ,i 01 & ask$ h] :y %e did n tell
 me :]e ,i 0 go+1 & :at 0 to be done to 
me4 ,%e said %e did n "k x till ,i 0 j  
go+ out ( ! h\se1 b ,i did n believe x1 
= h] husb& 0 "o ( ! bondsm54 ,?is       
bro!r's wife ,i _h lov$ mu* = h] /rong  
virtu\s pr9ciples & piety4 ,h[ %e c\ld h
 be5 accessory to ?is treatm5t t[>ds me1
 to scre5 !m f public c5sure1 ,i did n  
"k2 b ! de$ 0 done4 ,%e /opp$ ab\t t5   
m9utes1 & said %e w\ld come & see me    

aga94 ,b ! summ] pass$ away )\t "o com+ 
to see me4 ,i (t5 plead ) ,dr4 ,bell to 
let me see "s "o1 b ,i 0 told t !y did n
 wi% to see me4 ,i ( c\rse ?\ght !y did 
n1 = ,i always 0 despis$ by ! :ole      
family1 = :at ,i did n "k4 ,b ,i buri$ x
 all 9 my own he>t1 look+ =w>d :5 ,i    
%\ld be =c$ f ?is _w ( tr\ble & sorr[1 =
 my =]unn] 0 a man ( sorr[1 & acqua9t$ )
 grief2 & ,i mu/ be> all ?+s ev5 z he   
bore x4 ,i _h fri5ds t 7 de> to me1 & ,i
 ?\ght ,i %\ld l to see !m once m ^u    
e>?4 ,! cruel mock]y & ridicule t ,i _h 
heap$ ^u me !re 0 en\gh to cause any    
female to be sick ( h] life4 ,!y seem$  
to take delight 9 say+ ?+s to try       
me4--,miss ,b>b] & ,dr4 ,fox 7 9 !      
gall]y toge!r1 ! ,doctor /ood laugh+ at 
me1 = ,i 0 9 viol5t di/ress & cry+4 ,he 
said he ?\ght ,i grew fat on x4 ,miss   
,b>b] said sne]+ly1 d y n expect to ent]
 ! pe>ly gates & walk ! gold5 /reets ( !
 city ( ! ,new ,j]usalem8 ,i _h lo/ all 
idea ( hol9ess1 & ,i am utt]ly incapable
 ( us+ good language4 ,i ?\ght ( :at ,i 

once 01 & to be br\ght to ?is l[ degrad$
 /ate1 to suff] ?us 9 a gospel l&1      
griev$ me4  ,x is ! practice =          
physicians f o!r ,assylums to visit !re1
 & see all ! pati5ts4 ,"o day !re 0 a   
,dr4 ,ray1 ) o!rs f ! ,ma9e ,assylum2   
,dr4 ,bell began to mock me ab\t be+    
m>ri$1 kn[+ t all my affections 7 dead1 
to see :at effect x w\ld h ^u me1 hold+ 
my pulse at ! "t1 & laugh+ at ea* o!r4  
,to be made a subject ( mock]y be=e m5 9
 ?is obsc5e mann] 0 too mu*1 ,i appeal$ 
to 8 b5evol5ce to sp>e me ?is cruel     
mock]y2 spoke ( female "*1 & t ,i _h    
done mu* to save females f ! /ream (    
pollution4 ,my feel+s 7 ov]come1 & ,i   
seiz$ hold ( a *air to save me f fall+1 
b ,i 0 too f> gone & fell ^u ! floor1 & 
!n a ro> ( laught] 0 set up by all4 ,i  
w5t into my room & lay$ myself ^u ! b$4 
,i ?\ght ( ! poor slave1 b oh1 !y d n "k
 _! happ9ess2 gladly w\ld ,i ex*ange    
situations ) any "o t ev] suff]$ f !    
rude b>b>ian2 & yet x is ?r[n back ^u me
 t x is d]angem5t1 & my cruel tortur]s  

are held up & applaud$4 ,i s5t a lett]  
to bro!r ,eb5's wife1 to come2 b ,i     
receiv$ no visit f h] on acc\nt ( h]    
peculi> circum/ances4 ,i saw no "o until
 ! #bb;d ( ,dec4 ,i _h be5 !re !n ?irte5
 mon?s1 & _h se5 only bro!r ,eb5's wife4
 ,i plead ) my bro!r to let me g home2  
he said he 0 n will+1 b ,i might come   
out to 8 h\se aft] 8 wife's heal? 0     
bett]4 ,i felt t ,i 0 su* an outca/ t ,i
 _h no p to g to2 b t a "m mu/ h a "m's 
feel+s1 & ,i knew n :o to look to 9 ! _w
 9 my lo/1 ru9$ condition1 b a p>5t4 ,my
 bro!r seem$ to feel = my ru9$          
condition1 & ask$ me :y ,i did n tell   
:at my situation 01 = he knew no?+ ab\t 
x only :at !y told him4 ,?is bro!r _h   
nev] oppos$ me 9 my religion1 & ,i _h   
always tak5 a v active "p 9 8 family    
devotion1 z 8 wife is a memb] ( a       
congregational *ur*4 ,i told him ,i     
plead ) ,/eph5 n to leave me1 n kn[+ t x
 0 an ,insane ,assylum1 or :at 0 to be  
done to me4 ,i told him h[ ,i 0 depriv$ 
! privilege ( writ+4 ,he said he did n  

wi% me treat$ ill1 & wi%$ me to come out
 to 8 h\se4 ,i told him ,i want$ to g   
home4 ,he /opp$ ab\t an h\r ) me1 & bid 
me good bye1 & said he w\ld come aga94  
,?is 0 ab\t ! #bd? ( ,dec4 ,i ask$ ,dr4 
,bell to let me write to my bro!r1 /at+ 
t ,i w\ld g out to 8 h\se1 = ,i want$ to
 get out ( t place2 he gave me a v %ort 
answ]2 he said he 0 n will+ t ,i %\ld   
write to my bro!r1 or any o!r "o4 ,i !n 
told him t my bro!r told me ,i c\ld     
write to him any?+ t ,i wi%$4 ,he said  
if my bro!r told me s1 he 0 n will+2 ,i 
did n re/ at ?is1 b con/antly plead )   
him to grant me ! privilege1 b c\ld n   
prevail ^u him1 = he said t my bro!r 0  
glad ,i _h n accept$ 8 invitation4 ,!n  
,i took ! lib]ty ( writ+ )\t 8 cons5t1 &
 h&$ x to ,mr4 ,appleton1 "o ( !        
,tru/ees1 reque/+ him to prevail on ,dr4
 ,bell to let him take t lett] to my    
bro!r1 & wrote "o to ,mr4 ,appleton at !
 same "t1 /at+ ! reason ( tak+ t lib]ty4
 ,he told me he w\ld talk ) ,dr4 ,bell  
ab\t x4 ,! next day ,i ask$ ,dr4 ,bell  

if he _h s5t my lett]2 he said no2 ,i   
ask$ him ! reason2 he said x 0 because  
he ?\ght my bro!r w\ld n grant my       
reque/4 ,9 my lett] ,i reque/$ my bro!r 
to let me h a *ange2 if he ?\ght x n    
prop] to come to 8 h\se1 to let me g any
 :]e else4 ,i saw no "o aga9 until ,m>*1
 :5 my "m come to see me ) bro!r ,e4 ,i 
_h writt5 to h him come & see me1 & :at 
my situation 04 ,little did ,i ?9k b :at
 my p>5t knew ( my situation :5 ,i 0    
fir/ put 9 !re4 ,b ,i _h be5 !re ab\t a 
ye> be=e !y knew any ?+ ab\t x4 ,%e     
/opp$ ab\t an h\r4 ,at fir/ %e appe>$ to
 be q affect$2 b my "m does n pr(ess    
spirituality1 & always oppos$ me ab\t my
 religion1 & (t5 said1 aft] ,i met ) a  
*ange1 t %e ?\ght ,i 0 d]ang$4 ,( c\rse 
%e reg>d$ me z a d]ang$ p]son4 ,i plead 
h] to /ay all night ) me1 b %e return$ )
 my bro!r t night1 & said %e w\ld come  
on ,saturday4 ,on ,saturday %e came on !
 gall]y to see me1 ab\t two o'clock1 &  
return$ ) my bro!r at six2 ,i wi%$ h] to
 /ay all night ) me1 b %e 0 n will+4 ,i 

want$ my "m to tell my bro!r to take me 
out & let me g home ) h]4 ,b ,i always 0
 reg>d$ ) a great deal ( coldness1 & n[ 
,i 0 look$ ^u z a poor d]ang$ p]son1 &  
!re=e f\nd b little sympa?y4 ,my "m left
 me )\t bidd+ me good bye1 say+ t %e    
%\ld see me aga94 ,bro!r ,eb5 came to   
see me1 ab\t f\r weeks aft]4 ,/ill ,i   
plead ) him to let me g home2 b he want$
 me to come out to 8 h\se4 ,i felt t ,i 
did n want to g !re1 aft] he _h said he 
0 glad ,i did n accept 8 invitation4 ,b 
he has s9ce told me he nev] said s1 &   
has %ewn me a lett] he wrote to me1 say+
 t he wi%$ me to write to him1 & to come
 out to 8 h\se2 b ,dr4 ,bell advis$ him 
n to let me h ! lett]4 ,on ! #ae? (     
,april1 bro!r ,william came to see me1 f
 ,new ,york4 ,?is bro!r ,i _h n se5 b   
once = ab\t twelve ye>s4 ,he 0 mu*      
affect$ to he> ( my suff]+2 he said x _h
 always be5 repres5t$ to him t ,i 0 a   
p]fect d]ang$ p]son4 ,he come aga9 !    
next day & took me out4 ,i w5t to bro!r 
,eb5's t night1 & ! next day ,william   

c>ri$ me home4     ,,rem>ks4    ,^u !   
treatm5t ( my bro!rs & si/]s dur+ my    
imprisonm5t1 & ! /eps tak5 ) me by !m4  
,secondly1 rem>ks 9 g5]al conc]n+ !     
,hospital & !     ,(fic]s ( !           
,in/itution4   ,fir/ly4--,if my bro!rs &
 si/]s desir$ my good by plac+ me 9 !   
,insane ,assylum1 & ! ,doctors h tak5 ! 
advantage ( my weakness & my bro!r's    
ignorance ( my true /ate at t "t1 & x   
has prov$ to be my ev]la/+ ru91 by !    
,doctors giv+ me t m$ic9e :i* rack$ &   
tortur$ me & de/roy$ my phisical heal? &
 ease ( body & m5tal happ9ess4 ,_!      
motive c be det]m9$ by _! treatm5t &    
att5tion :ile !re1 & ! mann] ( !        
treatm5t t ,i h receiv$ 9 he>+ ( my     
suff]+s4 ,= good motives always lead to 
good & k9d actions4 ,i h giv5 9 g5]al a 
detail ( ! /eps t 7 tak5 ) me f ! "t (  
my leav+ my lab\r on ,saturday1 be=e ,i 
0 c>ri$ to ! ,hospital1 on ! ,?ursday   
foll[+1 & aft] ,i 0 !re1 _! att5tion to 
me4 ,i appeal to ! public m9d if ?is 0  
good1 k9d & j treatm5t2 if x 0 only my  

e>?ly happ9ess de/roy$ ,i %\ld rejoice  
amid/ x all4 ,i 0 tak5 out by my bro!r  
,william1 f ,new ,york2 b n[ ,i h no    
society1 ,i _c resort to ,god & to      
,god's p = com=t1 & take happ9ess 9 !   
s]vice ( ,god1 = ,i h n happ9ess )9     
myself1 z x is ! _s ( ,*ri/ t makes u   
happy1 & enables u to look =w>d to nev] 
end+ et]nity ( bliss4 ,n[ t _s is tak5 f
 me by m$ic9e1 & x leaves my body 9     
di/ress1 f ! cr[n ( my head to ! sole ( 
my foot1 )\t c>nal love ( ?is _w1 or !  
love ( ,god4 ,( c\rse )\t ! _s ( ,*ri/  
we _c love ,god4 ,i am ?r[n out ^u ! _w 
)\t any ?+ to help myself )4 ,my money t
 ,i labor$ h>d =1 late & e>ly1 conf9$ to
 a factory life1 is tak5 by my bro!rs4  
,!y are n will+ to give me my own1 or to
 help me4 ,i am unable to "w1 my body is
 9 su* di/ress2 & ,i h no _s to support 
me "u any ?+1 & am dep5dant ^u ! k9dness
 ( fri5ds :o h be5 deceiv$ ab\t me1 by !
 false report t ,i 0 d]ang$1 :ile all ! 
"t ,i 0 suff]+ ! greate/ cruelty t c\ld 
be practis$ ^u an immortal be+4 ,!y feel

 di/ress = me1 al?\gh x is a crime !y   
nev] he>d ( be=e1 & _m ( !m wond] t ,i h
 a p>ticle ( reason left1 & d n wond] at
 my alt]$ looks & language1 & feel t su*
 a crime %\ld be expos$ to ! _w4 ,x is n
 ! popul> cl]gy t w be seiz$ ^u & c>ri$ 
into t h\se & h ?is m$ic9e =c$ d[n !m1 b
 ! poor hone/ he>t$ *ri/ian t is despis$
 & ca/ out1 & trodd5 "u foot l ! despis$
 ,naz>9e4 ,?is havoc among ! sa9ts (    
,god1 by infidels1 has be5 go+ on =     
ye>s1 und\bt$ly1 & :5 !y h told ( x on  
gett+ out ( _! p[]1 x has be5 look$ ^u z
 d]angem5t1 & _! acc\nt be+ seal$ )     
,god1 !y h n und]tak5 to publi% x2 b ,i 
w1 :e!r x is or n2 & if my bro!rs       
wilfully hir$ ^? ,doctors to give me t  
m$ic9e1 to take f me my et]nal life1    
because ,i diff]$ f !m 9 my religion1   
may ,god br+ x to light1 & ! guilty n g 
unpuni%$4 ,females are engag$ 9 ?is     
horrid crime1 & d "k t x c be done4     
,relief ,b>b]1 ,m>y ,brigham & ,e/h]    
,b5ton1 :o are engag$ 9 ! s]vice ( t    
h\se1 & my bro!r's wife1 7 kn[+ to x    

be=e ,i 0 c>ri$ !re4 ,bro!rs ,eb51      
,/eph51 & ,james1 are ! ones t 7 conc]n$
 ab\t my be+ c>ri$ !re1 & !y are ! ones 
t _h ought to inve/igate my suff]+4 ,b1 
in/ead ( t1 !y h n int]e/$ !mselves 9 my
 suff]+s or wants1 & bro!r ,/eph5 & 8   
wife came to bro!r ,eb5's1 :]e ,i 01 &  
did n ev5 s5d a reque/ to my room to see
 me4 ,i speak ( ?is to %[ t my bro!rs d 
n feel = me z bro!rs %\ld feel = a si/]4
 ,s f> z ! natural he>t is conc]n$1 _h  
my bro!rs reg>d$ my "* & my feel+s1 & ! 
feel+s ( our ag$ p>5ts1 !y w\ld n h put 
me into an ,insane ,hospital )\t some?+ 
be+ done = me fir/4 ,i might m5tion ab\t
 my clo!s t ,i _h s5t me4--,i 0 tak5 &  
%ut up f !m1 & f ! means to obta9 ?+s to
 make me com=table1 or h>dly dec5t2 b if
 my bro!rs & si/]s ?\ght my heal? 0     
poor1 & !y desir$ my good1 k9d actions  
w\ld h foll[$ k9d feel+s4 ,i h be=e     
rem>k$1 w\ld !y n h s5t me little       
n\ri%m5ts1 su* z !y d n h !re1 z fri5ds 
g5]ally d :5 !y h a fri5d t is out (    
heal?4 ,b ,i receiv$ no?+ to rem9d me t 

,i 0 n =gott5 by !m4 ,k9d read]1 h y a  
wife1 si/]1 or an unprotect$ daught] 9  
?is wide _w1 7h[ev] y may be situat$1 ! 
same laws gov]n nature ?ro'ought ! _w17 
w\ld y see h] deceiv$ into a hospital ! 
?ird day ( leav+ h] "w1 hav+ no?+ done =
 h] fir/1 & !n n p]mit h] to see "o ( h]
 k9d fri5ds8 ,because ,god saw fit n to 
give me ! abundance ( ?is _w 0 ,i any ! 
less incapable ( happ9ess "h & h]eaft]8 
,because ,i 0 a poor factory girl mu/ ,i
 be treat$ 9 ?is brutal mann]1 9 ?is    
boa/$ l& ( lib]ty8 ,i always _h done =  
myself1 & 0 happy4 ,i envi$ n ! ,que5 ^u
 h] ?rone4 ,i s\ght enjoym5t 9 exp&+ my 
immortal m9d 9 k1 look+ ?r\gh nature up 
to nature's ,god1 & cultivat+ ! love (  
,god ri*ly 9 my he>t4 ,i 0 kept 9 !     
,assylum sixte5 long & we>y mon?s4 ,my  
bro!rs say !y come to ! h\se2 b !y might
 z well h /ay$ away z to come1 = all !  
good x did me1 = ,i nev] saw !m4 ,!y say
 ,dr4 ,bell w\ld n let !m see me4 ,:at  
"r _h !y to put me 9 su* a place8 ,! v  
face ( x %[s t !re 0 "s cruelty be+     

practis$ ^u me1 t ,dr4 ,bell did n want 
any "o to "k out ( t h\se4 ,x may be    
said t ,i _h no home1 & ! woman t ,i    
bo>d$ ) w\ld n h me 9 h] h\se4 ,c\ld x  
be t ,eliza ,lufk9 w\ld turn me out ( h]
 h\se on ! ?ird day ( my illness8 ,_h x 
be5 done op5ly1 ,i %\ld h _h fri5ds t   
w\ld h done = me1 = ,i feel t ,i c\ld   
say ) ! ,apo/le ,paul1 t ,i _h fri5ds t 
w\ld h pluck$ out _! eyes to d = me4 ,b 
n only 0 ,i tak5 9 su* an unlawful mann]
 & imprison$1 b away f all my ?+s1 & no 
c>e tak5 ( !m2 "s entirely ru9$ = want (
 c>e1 & "s ru9$ by be+ worn almo/ out4  
,:o has worn !m ,i _c say2 b my trunks 7
 at my bro!r ,/eph5's4 ,if my bro!rs    
desir$ my good !y w\ld inve/igate my    
suff]+s4 ,i h propos$ to !m to h !      
,doctors tak5 be=e a ju/ice ( ! peace1  
produce ! k9d ( m$ic9e !y gave me1 &    
apply a *emical te/ & see :at effect x  
w\ld h ^u ! human sy/em4 ,if my bro!rs  
are innoc5t ab\t my be+ ru9$1 ,i ?9k !y 
w\ld d x1 al?\gh x w\ld n br+ back to me
 my happy /ate2 b x w\ld expose !       

wick$ness ( ! ,doctors 9 ! ,*>le/[n     
,hospital1 & save o!rs f suff]+ ! same4 
,i 0 f> f be+ d]ang$2 b ,i grant t ,i 0 
9 a weak /ate4 ,b because ,i 0 weak1 f  
ov] ex]tion1 0 t any reason :y ,i %\ld  
be imprison$1 & m$ic9e giv5 me to h>d5  
my bra91 to rack & torture me8 ,to give 
a p]son an idea ( ! di/ress ( my body e 
mom5t1 w\ld be impossible2 b well ,i    
might quote ! language ( ,*illian3      
,my limbs are b[$1 ?\gh n ) toil1     ,b
 ru/$ ) a vile repose1     ,= !y h be5 a
 dungeon's spoil4  ,rem>ks ^u !         
,in/itution4--,!re is no dispute b :at  
!re %\ld be su* an in/itution z an      
,insane ,assylum1 b let x come "u !     
jurisdiction ( ! ,legislature1 & n h all
 ! p[] consign$ into ! h&s ( a few      
individuals1 ov] a di/ress$ class (     
be+s1 a money-mak+ sy/em1 at ! exp5se ( 
happ9ess1 9 a great measure4 ,if x 0    
?\ght be/ to h all p[] put into ! h&s ( 
"o individual1 !n we %\ld h a ,k+ 9 ?is 
c\ntry1 b x is n ?\ght be/4 ,z t h\se is
 n[1 if any family difficulty breaks out

 betwe5 ! memb]s1 ! /rong] c take !     
weak]1 raise a cry t !y are insane1     
deceive !m 9 !re1 or take !m by =ce1 &  
deprive !m ( _! lib]ty2 & ! poor        
individual is dis>m$ ( ! protection ( ! 
/rong arm ( our c\ntry's laws4 ,x gives 
p[] to *ildr5 ov] _! p>5ts1 p>5ts ov]   
*ildr51 bro!rs & si/]s ov] ea* o!r1 &   
neighb\r ov] neighb\r4 ,a case ( *ildr5 
ris+ aga9/ a p>5t took place :ile ,i 0  
!re4 ,a poor wid[ woman hav+ a family   
difficulty ab\t prop]ty1 h] sons rose   
aga9/ h]1 got an (fic] & br\ght h] to ! 
,assylum1 & %e work$ = !m all ! "t %e 0 
!re4 ,9 my own case1 ,i _h prop]ty &    
ought to h a gu>dian appo9t$ if ,i 0    
incapable ( tak+ c>e ( myself4 ,w\ld x n
 be well to h x a law t no p]son %\ld be
 c>ri$ into an ,insane ,hospital )\t !  
advice ( a c\ncil ( physicians1 & n h x 
left to ! judgm5t ( "o p]son1 = x is n  
an uncommon ?+ = p]sons to be put 9 !re 
:o are n insane1 & !y _c help !mselves4 
,! public is completely deceiv$ ab\t !  
situation ( _! fri5ds aft] !y are !re4  

,on visit+ ! build+ e ?+ pres5ts a fair 
appe>ance2 b 9 ord] to "k ! evil ( any  
place y mu/ fir/ be 9 x4 ,9 ! fir/      
place1 ,i %all speak ( :at ! poor       
pati5ts h to suff] on acc\nt ( !        
neatness ( ! int]ior ( ! build+1 z t is 
s (t5 spoke ( by visitors4 ,a great deal
 ( pa9s is tak5 9 e ?+ ( an outw>d      
appe>ance1 :ile ?+s t are n se5 by      
visit]s1 are n reg>d$4 ,! floors are1 z 
x 71 ! ,god t !y wor%ip2 !y mu/ be wa%$ 
e day1 & ! poor pati5ts suff] 9 be+     
neglect$ dur+ ! "t1 :i* is v frequ5tly !
 case1 & if a poor pati5t /eps ^u !     
floor = sometime aft]1 !y h to take a   
sev]e reprim&1 & are lock$ up 9 _! room 
all day z a puni%m5t1 because ! att5dant
 is afraid ! floor w h a m>k ^u x4 ,x is
 all well en\gh to keep clean2 b !      
happ9ess ( ! poor pati5t is n reg>d$4 ,x
 is v tiresome to be conf9$ to "o room &
 n be p]mitt$ to walk 9 x4 ,secondly1 9 
cold wea!r ! uncom=tabl5ess ( ! gall]y  
is v try+4 ,"s days n any fire1 &       
depriv$ ( e privilege b t ( brea?+1 & if

 9 viol5t pa9 & suff]+ ! pati5ts weep & 
make any compla9t1 !y mu/ be %ut up 9 _!
 room1 or /ripp$ ( all _! clo!s & %[]$ )
 cold wat]1 & !n c>ri$ to a /one        
dungeon4 ,p are v mu* deceiv$ :5 !y call
 to see _! fri5ds2 & ! poor di/ress$    
pati5ts are weep+ _! h\rs away to see   
!m1 & are %ut out f all religi\s        
influ5ce4     ,,clos+ ,,rem>ks ,,to     
,,*ri/ians4   ,*ri/ian read]1 :atev] "n 
y may be>1 ,i address y1 y :o h got ! _s
 ( ,*ri/ witness+ ) y\r _s t y are born 
( ,god4 ,y h read :at ,i h /at$ & y may 
be ready to say y don't believe x2 b l5d
 me a li/5+ e> ) an enlight5$ und]/&+1  
bo? by ! _s & k1 = ,i h put =? ?is ef=t 
to make kn[n ?is k to ! _w1 to save y f 
! awful outrage ( ! wick$ at ! pres5t   
day1 = y are liable yet to h ! cry rais$
 ab\t y t y are insane & to be tak5 &   
imprison$ z ,i h be51 :]e viol5ce is us$
 to =ce m$ic9e d[n y\r ?roat :i* kills  
or de/roys ! _s ( ,*ri/ 9 y4 ,y are     
ignorant1 ,i "k1 t ?is k is ^u ! e>?1 & 
! ,bible does n give any acc\nt ( x1    

except+ 9 ,heb4 ,*apt4 vi4 v]se #d1 #f2 
& ,/4 ,paul does n say h[ x c be done4  
,*ri/ian read] x is y t ought to be     
int]e/$ 9 :at ,i say1 & be=e y say t x  
is d]angm5t1 & give /r5g? to ! wick$ 9 !
 greate/ crime t c be committ$ ^u an    
immortal be+1 condsid] well :at a crime 
y hold up4 ,:y %\ld ,i wi% to />t su* a 
?+ be=e ! _w if x 0 n s8 = gladly w\ld  
,i kneel & lift up my voice 9 pray] to  
,god & leave beh9d ! ?+s t are beh9d &  
press on t[>ds ! m>k = ! prize4         
,p]secution to a *ri/ian is l wat] to a 
plant2 :at is call$ d]angem5t by "s1 or 
deliri\s ab\t religion1 c be remov$ by  
m$ic9e by ! ,dr4's at ! ,*>le/[n        
,hospital4 ,! pa9s & di/ress ( !        
op]ation _c be f\nd ^u ! annals (       
cruelty ( any nation1 & !n ! di/ress$   
situation x leaves "o 91--nei!r love to 
,god nor fell[ be+s4 ,de> *ri/ian read]1
 :at ,i tell y is ! tru?4 ,ask y\rself !
 "q1 :at did ,dr4 ,bell urge me to      
relate my *ri/ian exp]i5ce =8 :y did he 
ask me h[ mu* ,i read ! ,bible1 m ?an   

any o!r book8 ,:at if "o ( our          
mission>ies 7 tak5 & imprison$1 & :5 !y 
%\ld be tak5 out & come to tell ( _!    
suff]+s & :at 0 said to !m be=e ! m$ic9e
 0 giv5 to !m1 w\ld x n %[ t ! crime 0 9
 accordance ) ! :ole drift ( _!         
conv]sation4 ,:y did ,dr4 ,fox say t ,i 
mu/ n ?9k ,i 0 s fill$ ) ! _s2 any m9i/]
 w\ld laugh at me4 ,i _h n told him ,i  
04 ,:y 0 ,i %ut up & no "o all[$ to see 
me8  ,read]1 make x y\r own case to be  
put 9 prison 9 a well /ate ( heal? among
 "s ( ! wor/ *>act]s1 entire /rang]s1 & 
ab\t ?ree mon?s 9 a /one dungeon1 a poor
 unprotect$ girl4--,w\ld x n almo/ make 
y d]ang$8 ,_h a poor p]secut$ *ri/ian   
ought to be consign$ into ! h&s (       
unconv]t$ r\gh m58 ,:at crim9al ev] 0   
execut$ 9 our l& b if !y made ! reque/  
to see "s m9i/] or pi\s fri5d x 0 all[$ 
!m2 b no1 ,i 0 a poor p]secut$ *ri/ian2 
,i ask$ to see "s m9i/]1 ,mr4 ,w9sl[ ,i 
p>ticul>ly ask$ to see2 b no1 ! la/ &   
fatal bl[ mu/ be /ruck ^u me4 ,if ,i _h 
violat$ ! laws ( our c\ntry1 :y n give  

me a lawful trial 9 a c\rt ( ju/ice &   
let me suff] ! p5alty atta*$ to ! laws  
:i* ,i _h violat$8 ,if ,i 0 9 a weak    
/ate & try$ ab\t my spiritual /ate1 0 x 
"r to %ut me up away f all my de>       
associates & godly influ5ce8 ,at fir/ ,i
 ?\ght ,i 0 9 a h\se ( ill-fame4 ,o1    
,god only kn[s :at ,i suff]$ & :at ,i   
aft]w>ds _h to g ?r\gh4 ,_h ,i be5      
deceiv$ into su* a h\se x w\ld h be5    
no?+ to :at my situation is1 & :at my   
suff]+s h be54  ,de> *ri/ian read]1 ,i w
 %[ y by ! ,bible :]e ,i 0 :5 ,i 0 c>ri$
 into ,*>le/[n ,hospital4 ,:5 ,i 0      
conv]t$ ,i _h a /rong hope to support me
 aga9/ ! w9d & tide ( ?is _w4 ,z an     
an*or is to a %ip s is a hope 9 ,*ri/   
,jesus to a p]son 9 ?is _w4 ,!y are sav$
 f ! pollution ( ! _w ?r\gh ! wa%+ (    
reg5]ation2 sav$ f ! corruption t is 9  
_! own he>t & ! temptations ar\nd !m4   
,!re is b "o religion t is good = any   
?+1 or "o's religion is z good z        
ano!r's4 ,b :y is all ?is cont5tion ab\t
 religion8 x mu/ mean some?+4 ,"o s\l   

sav$ f s9n+ by be+ wa%$ 9 ! blood (     
,*ri/ is ( m value ?an all ?is _w4 ,de> 
read]1 h pati5ce & ,i w soon br+ y to ! 
po9t t ,i wi% y to und]/&4 ,if hol9ess  
is liable to become a disease1 z !y     
pret5d to say x does1 & man has f\nd out
 h[ to give m$ic9e to take away f a     
p]son :at !y call d]angem5t & ! agony is
 s great & !n x leaves ! p]son 9 a /ate 
( suff]+ "h ( body & )\t ! _s ( ,*ri/1 a
 p]son mu/ suff] =ev]1 = out ( ,*ri/    
,god is a consum+ fire2 b 9 ,*ri/ a     
p]son c bless & praise ,god amid/ !     
burn+ flames4 ,:5 a p]son is conv]t$ !y 
are turn$ f p]su+ ! love ( ?is _w & seek
 aft] t holy love t is 9 !m :i* is ,*ri/
 & let all _! actions be con/ra9$ by t  
love4 ,aft] a p]son is conv]t$ !y       
comm5ce runn+ aft] a prize1 :i* is      
,*ri/1 & 9 ,*ri/ is all ! ,godhead      
bodily1 ,fa!r1 ,son & ,holy ,gho/4      
,aga91 ,*ri/ w ?or\ghly purge 8 floor1  
ca/ out unclean spirits out ( y\r he>t &
 y ent] ! second "t )\t s9 unto         
salvation4 ,aga9 to all :o look = him he

 w appe> ! second "t )\t s9 unto        
salvation1 *ange _! vile bodies & make  
!m l unto 8 mo/ glori\s body1 or baptize
 !m ) fire & ) ! ,holy ,gho/1 or be+    
clo!d ^u ) our h\se f heav51 :i* is     
et]nal1 immortal & full ( glory4        
,*ri/ian read]1 ,i _h embrac$ ! views t 
are agitat$ at ! pres5t day1 t ! _w is  
soon to be de/roy$1 or :at is call$     
,mill]'s doctr9e4 ,all ,i aim$ at 0 to  
get out ( s91 or be+ oblig$ to g ) !    
multitude to commit s91 z ,i hat$ wrong 
& unholy actions1 & to get ready to g up
 to meet ! ,"l 9 ! air z e "o t has ?is 
hope )9 himself purifies ev5 z he is    
pure2 = x is by grace :i* y are sav$ & n
 ( y\rself1 x is ! gift ( ,god4 ,:at to 
me 0 ga9 ,i c\nt$ loss & dross2 yea1    
dung1 if ,i c\ld b w9 ,*ri/4 ,i s run z 
to obta9 ! prize 9 six ye>s4 ,! prize is
 w9n+ ,*ri/1 & 9 ,*ri/ ,jesus is all !  
,godhead bodily1 ! ,fa!r1 ,son & ,holy  
,gho/4 ,x is ! cr[n :i* is immortal1    
et]nal & full ( glory4 ,truly ,i 0 full 
( ! ,holy ,gho/1 ent]$ into ! holy city 

& _h "r to ! tree ( life1 :i* ! leaves  
!re( are = ! heal+ ( ! nations4 ,hol9ess
 belongs to ! he>t1 n to days1 mon?s1 or
 ye>s4 ,! p ( ,god are to be ! holy 9   
all _! actions & ?\ghts2 !y are sav$ f  
foll[+ s9 by hav+ ! _s ( ,*ri/4         
,*ri/ian read]1 ,i "k y mu/ read ?is )  
m+l$ emotions2 & x mu/ wr+ y\r he>t )   
grief to ?9k t ! ,son ( ,god has be5    
crucifi$2 b x leaves ! p]son t 0 9      
possession ( ?is heav5ly treasure (     
c\rse to be =ev] 9 di/ress1 = !re       
rema9e? no m sacrifice1 :i* mu/ add     
d\ble grief to y 9 p]us+ ^! pages2 or   
are y ready to ?r[ x back ^u me1 say+ x 
is all a delusion2 t man _c de/roy !    
s\l2 man's p[] is n great] ?an ,god's4  
,b1 *ri/ian read]1 x is k t man has     
obta9$ ( *emi/ry4 ,by putt+ two         
sub/ances toge!r a ?ird is produc$      
unlike bo?4 ,:at ! m$ic9e is ,i "k n1 b 
,i ?9k ,i c\ld tell x if ,i saw         
x4--,*ri/ian read]1 y h nev] ?\ght x to 
be v /range t a p]son c\ld be poison$ to
 dea?4 ,9 t case x sep]ates _s f matt]2 

& 9 ?is case x sep]ates ,god's ,holy ,_s
 f matt]1 = y "k x is n only a belief1 =
 ! ,devils believe & tremble4 ,b x is   
hav+ ,jesus 9 y1 ! hope ( glory1 a pray+
 _s2 & ,i wi% y to und]/& x is t pray+  
_s t c be tak5 f y by m$ic9e4 ,! m$ic9e 
h>d5s or petrifies ! bra94 ,9 my case x 
is ! bra9 t lays 9 ! back "p ( my head t
 is de/roy$1 :]e ! faculties ( affection
 are locat$2 = ! volume ( nature &      
revelation agree4 ,i ref] n[ to ! sci5ce
 ( ,phr5ology1 z !re is tru? 9 x :e!r y 
believe x or n4 ,! fif? ,*apt4 (        
,gallations tells :at y are by nature1 &
 :at y mu/ be 9 ord] to ent] ! k+dom (  
heav54 ,by s[+ to ! _s1 ,i crucifi$ my  
affections & lu/s1 ceas$ to d ! works ( 
! fle%4 ,y may ?9k ?is is n 9 ?is _w1 b 
x is only w9n+ ! prize = ! high call+   
:i* is 9 ,*ri/1 or ent]+ 9 ^u ! sev5?   
,sabba?4--,z ,dr4 ,bell has giv5 me     
m$ic9e t has kill$ t _s 9 me ,i h no    
idea ( hol9ess or hatr$ to s91 & ,i h no
 idea ( wor%ip1 = we wor%ip :at we      
supremely love & br+ all our actions to 

be> ^u t object on :i* our affections   
are set4--,b ! idea ( love is gone f me1
 & my body is void ( happ9ess1 bo? c>nal
 & spiritual4  ,let !re be a mighty cry 
made by ! public1 & se>* into ! iniquity
 ( ,*>le/[n ,mc,lean ,assylum4 ,i "k x  
is held up by :at is call$ ! popul>     
class1 b x is a comb9ation ( m51 a sy/em
 t is worse ?an slav]y1 & any crime c be
 done !re & cov]$ up "u ! g>b (         
d]angem5t1 & no "o int]f]e4 ,de>        
,*ri/ian read]1 ,i h put =? ?is appeal  
to let ! *ri/ian _w "k t ?is k is kn[n  
^u ! e>?1 & x is 9 ! h&s ( ! wick$4 ,:y 
is ! public s sil5t ^u ! suff]+s ( a    
poor girl8 ,if ,i _h be5 tak5 by !      
unciviliz$ r$ man ( ! woods & n half s  
cruelly treat$1 ! pap]s w\ld h be5 full 
( x4 ,if ,i _h l$ a l[1 debas+ life1 &  
_h be5 murd]$ l an ,ell5 ,jewett1 !     
public w\ld h be5 r\s$ & ! pap]s w\ld h 
be5 full ( x f ea/ to we/1 & f nor? to  
s\?2 b a m horrid crime has be5 done4   
,o6 ,,t ,a ,,dagg] _h be5 plung$ into my
 ,,he>t 9 ! midnight h\r2 x w\ld h be5 b

 mom5t>y suff]+ & !n my immortal m9d    
gr[+ & exp&+ ?r\gh\t ! c\ntless ages (  
et]nity 9 ! k & wisdom ( ,god4  ,read]1 
y may be ready to ?r[ x back ^u me1 say+
 x is d]angem5t1 ,i expect x2 let me    
once h he>d ( su* a ?+ & ,i don't "k b  
,i %\ld h ?\ght x d]angem5t4 ,b1 *ri/ian
 read]1 x is y & y only t c und]/& a "p 
( my language1 speak+ ab\t my spiritual 
life4 ,all :o =m]ly knew me1 :o see me  
n[1 say t "s cruelty has be5 done to me4
 ,my old neighbors t knew me f a *ild1  
say t ,i am s alt]$ !y h>dly "k me4 ,my 
old ,new ,hampton s*ool mates t ,i h met
 ) s9ce ,i 0 tak5 out ( ! ,hospital1 />t
 back ) surprise & say t !y c h>dly     
trace a look 9 me t ,i once _h1 & n a   
trait 9 my deportm5t t ,i once possess$4
 ,!y say t c\nt5ance t once 0 lit up )  
happ9ess is n[ m>k$ ) deep sorr[2 ^?    
eyes t once sp>kl$ ) joy are n[ dead &  
sunk5 ) grief1 & ! language1 & ! voice  
are s diff]5t t "s de/ruction has come  
^u y2 & :5 ,i tell !m :at x is1 my long 
imprisonm5t1 sixte5 mon?s & tw5ty days1 

n all[$ to see any "o t ,i ev] saw be=e1
 only ?ree ( my folks dur+ ! "t1 nor    
all[$ to write2 h[ my happ9ess is tak5 f
 me1 my body rack$ & tortur$1 ! di/ress$
 situation t ,i am 91 !y are ba!d 9     
te>s4 ,o tell me n1 ,elizabe?1 t y are  
lo/2 y 0 once s happy 9 ! love ( ,god1 &
 ! deep l\d sob bur/s f _! full he>ts1  
,c ?is be ,elizabe? ,/one2 c ?is crime  
be done & ?is cruelty practis$ "h 9 !   
mid/ ( u & cov]$ up & no?+ said ab\t x8 
,is ?is ! /ate ( our c\ntry1 t ! rights 
( a poor female are trampl$ ^u1 & ! laws
 ( our c\ntry1 :]e !re has be5 s mu*    
blood spilt to "w out ! lib]ty ( e free 
born son & daught] ( ,am]ica4 ,& because
 ,i endeavor to make kn[n to ! _w ?is   
crime1 ,i am ?reat5$ ) a second         
imprisonm5t1 by my bro!r ,eb54 ,if x is 
a crazy /ory surely x w d no h>m1 & if x
 is n1 :y _h x n ought to come out4 ,let
 a c\ncil ( physicians be held ^u my    
body & see if ,i am a p]son t c enjoy   
life4 ,i ?9k t m9ds t und]/& !          
organization ( ! human body & its       

functions w say t "s outrage has be5    
commit$ ^u me4 ,if ,i _h lo/ my reason  
is x "r to take ! advantage ( a crazy   
p]son & de/roy happ9ess4 ,*>le/[n       
,mc,lean ,assylum is to a weak excit$   
p]son z a grog-%op is to an intemp]ate  
man1 or a h\se ( ill-fame1 to a lic5ti\s
 p]son2 !y c be completely ru9$4 ,i hope
 ?is w be look$ into be=e ano!r "o is   
de/roy$1 & t ^? /ill rema9+ 9 t awful   
place ( imprisonm5t1 weep+ _! h\rs away1
 may be reliev$ by see+ _! fri5ds soon4 
,may ,god awak5 ! m9d ( ! public to !   
suff]+s ( ! helpless4  ,i am frequ5tly  
ask$ ! "q1 by ^? :o he> ( my suff]+s1 if
 ,i don't ?9k ,i %all be happy aft]     
dea?4 ,i w answ] ?is "h s e "o may "k   
:at my dreadful situation is4--,no6 =   
reasons be=e /at$4  ,at ! reque/ ( _m ( 
my fri5ds1 ,i h be5 exam9$ by a         
magnetiz$ somnambuli/1 & ,i am reque/$  
to /ate ! result ( ! exam9ation to !    
public4 ,i 0 exam9$ ! fir/ "t by ,mr4   
,f[l]1 ! ,phr5ologi/1 tak+ a lock ( my  
hair to ,miss ,gleason4 ,%e /at$ t ,i _h

 great di/ress 9 ! back "p ( my head1 my
 sp9al m>r[ 0 dry2 di/ress 9 my limbs1  
incl9$ to sit =w>ds2 disagreable feel+  
at my /oma*2 n]v\s temp]am5t2 ne$$ k9d  
treatm5t1 c4 ,! #ae? ( ,july ,i 0 exam9$
 aga9 by ,miss ,gleason1 be+ p]sonally  
pres5t4 ,%e 0 magnetiz$ by ,mr4         
,butrick1 a /rang] to me4 ,i did n g    
into ! room till aft] %e 0 asleep4 ,%e  
/at$ ab\t ! same z %e did ! fir/ "t1 b  
add$ t my bra9 look$ d>k2 t ,i _h be5 9 
su* di/ress x 0 a wond] ,i _h liv$ ?r\gh
 x2 & ,i /ill 0 9 di/ress2 my bra9 0    
drawn toge!r & %e cl5*$ h] h&s toge!r 9 
ord] to convey ! idea2 %e rem>k$ ^u my  
disposition1 be+ v decid$ 9 my op9ion2  
an enquir+ m9d1 desir+ to labor ) my    
head r ?an my h&s1 :i* _h inc5s$ my     
relations aga9/ me2 & x w\ld h be5 bett]
 = me if !y _h put me into ! grave alive
 ?an c>ri$ me to ! ,hospital4 ,if ,i _h 
nev] be5 c>ri$ !re ,i %\ld n h be5 z ,i 
am n[2 = ! future ,i c\ld n labor ) my  
head4 ,if ,i publi%$ my suff]+s to ! _w 
x w\ld n be believ$ because ,i c\ld n n[

 use language to express myself4 ,%e    
?\ght x w\ld be inve/igat$4  ,july      
#bc;d1 ,i 0 exam9$ 9 public by ,mrs4    
,pease1 at ! ,masonic ,hall1 :o 0 ) ,mr4
 ,%attuck lectur+ on ,magnetism4 ,i 0 an
 entire /rang] to !m bo?4 ,%e /at$ t ,i 
0 n]v\s1 di/ress$ 9 ! back "p ( my head2
 t "s p[]ful m9]al m$ic9e _h be5 giv5 to
 me1 :i* _h injur$ me2 t ,i _h be5      
cruelly deceiv$4 ,%e describ$ ! m$ic9e  
to be pills & a liquid1 v d>k & "s      
color$ resembl+ saffron2 t x _h injur$  
my bra91 & x nev] ought to h be5 giv5 to
 me2 & ,i _h be5 injur$ by unk9d        
treatm5t2 my ambition l$ me to g beyond 
my /r5g? 9 labor & read+1 & t m$ic9e    
ought n to be giv5 to any "o1 c4 ,_m 7  
pres5t :o _h he>d ( my suff]+s & 7      
surpris$ to he> h] tell x s exactly4    
,may ,god br+ to light ?is awful crime1 
= my suff]+s d n end 9 ?is _w1 al?\gh ! 
crime 0 done by o!rs4  ,9 conclusion1   
be=e ?is "w is attribut$ to insanity :y 
w n ! public dem& an exam9ation ( !     
affairs & managem5t ( ! ,mc',lean       

,assylum1 & see :e!r my *>ges be true or
 false4     ,,errata4   ,9 ! #be? l9e   
fir/ page1 read ,x = ,i4 ,same page #e? 
l9e f ! bottom1 read ,i = ,x4 ,on #d?   
page1 #bd? & #be? l9es1 aft] refus$ to  
obey him read = my tea*] said )\t ! m9d 
0 enlight5$ by ! ,_s ( ,*ri/ x 0 n      
prep>$ = k4 ,page #aj?1 #cc;d l9e1 =    
,eliza ,dammus read ,c>ol9e ,damm]s4 ,on
 #ab? page1 #d? l9e1 read ,david in/ead 
( ,daniel4 ,on page #bb;d1 #ah? l9e1 =  
him read my "m4 ,same page1 #bj? l9e1 = 
too read to come4 ,same page1 #bi? l9e1 
= noon read night4 ,on #bf? page1 #ab?  
l9e f bottom1 = non-spiritual read nor  
spiritual4 ,on ! #bh? page1 #bb;d l9e1  
read f suff]+1 = matt] _c be annihilat$2
 b ,i %\ld to c4 ,on #bi? page1 #i? l9e1
 in/ead ( & said !y are1 c41 read & says
 ! organs are1 c4 ,same page1 #af? l9e f
 ! bottom1 = ,dr4 ,fox1 read ,dr4 ,bell4
 ,on #ca/ page1 #h? l9e1 = ,dr4 ,kay1   
read ,dr4 ,ray4