,transcriber's note3 ,text enclosed by underscores is in italics 7italics74 ,small capital text has been replaced with all capitals4 99 99 99 99 99 ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,paul ,,william ,,cleaver ,,wilkinson ,author of ,the ,epic of ,saul ,,funk ,,wagnalls ,,company ,,new ,,york ,,and ,,london #ahih ,copyright1 #ahig1 by ,,funk ,,wagnalls ,,company ,registered at ,stationers' ,hall1 ,london1 ,england ,,printed ,,in ,,the ,,united ,,states ,,of ,,america ,,contents4 ,,page ,book ,i4 ,,plot ,,and ,,counterplot #i ,book ,,ii4 ,,paul ,,and ,,gamaliel #dc ,book ,,iii4 ,,shimei ,,and ,,the ,,chiliarch #gg ,book ,,iv4 ,,by ,,night ,,for ,c,,sarea #aae ,book ,v4 ,,shimei ,,and ,,young ,,stephen #adg ,book ,,vi4 ,,paul ,,before ,,felix #afg ,book ,,vii4 ,,to ,c,,sar #aic ,book ,,viii4 ,,shimei ,,before ,,julius #bbg ,book ,,ix4 ,,paul ,,and ,,young ,,stephen #beg ,book ,x4 ,,re-,,embarked #bia ,book ,,xi4 ,,the ,,last ,,of ,,shimei #cae ,book ,,xii4 ,,paul ,,and ,,krishna #cci ,book ,,xiii4 ,,shipwreck #cfc ,book ,,xiv4 ,,mary ,,magdalene #cie ,book ,,xv4 ,,young ,,stephen ,,and ,,felix #dbe ,book ,,xvi4 ,,interlude ,,of ,,krishna #dec ,book ,,xvii4 ,,the ,,story ,,of ,,the ,,cross #dhe ,book ,,xviii4 ,,krishna #ejg ,book ,,xix4 ,,baptism ,,of ,,krishna #ecg ,book ,,xx4 ,,euthanasy #efi ,book ,,xxi4 ,,arrival #eig ,book ,,xxii4 ,,drusilla ,,and ,,nero #fbe ,book ,,xxiii4 ,,nero ,,and ,,simon #ffa ,book ,,xxiv4 ,,the ,,end #fia ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,paul4 ,the action of ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,paul begins with that conspiracy formed at ,jerusalem against the life of the apostle which in the sequel led to a prolonged suspension of his free missionary career4 ,it embraces the incidents of his removal from ,jerusalem to ,csarea1 of his imprisonment at the latter place1 of his journey to ,rome for trial before ,csar1 and of his final martyrdom4 ,the design of the poem as a whole is to present1 through conduct on ,paul's part and through speech from him1 a living portrait of the man that he was1 together with a reflex of his most central and most characteristic teaching4 ,,proem4 ,paul1 the new man1 retrieved from perished ,saul1 ,unequalled good and fair1 from such unfair1 ,such evil1 orient1 miracle unguessed6-- ,both what himself he was and what he taught-- ,this marvel in meet words to fashion forth ,and make it live an image to the mind ,forever1 blooming in celestial youth1 ,were well despair to purer power than mine2 ,help me ,thou1 ,author of the miracle6 ,,book ,i4 ,,plot ,,and ,,counterplot4 ,paul is arraigned before the ,sanhedrim at ,jerusalem4 ,he had the day preceding been murderously set upon by a ,jewish mob1 from whose hands he was with difficulty rescued by a ,roman officer1 to be held as a prisoner supposed of infamous character4 ,while ,paul is thus held1 a conspiracy of desperate ,jews is formed by ,shimei against his life4 ,this conspiracy is fortunately discovered and exposed by ,stephen1 a young nephew of the apostle1 acting at the instance of his mother ,rachel1 ,paul's sister1 and under the advice of ,gamaliel1 ,paul's old teacher4 ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,paul4 ,,plot ,,and ,,counterplot4 ,the ,sanhedrim once more1 with ,saul arraigned1 ,saul now no longer1 and no longer young1 ,paul his changed name1 to note his nature changed4 ,confronting frown on him1 a prisoner1 ,paul's colleagues of the days when he was ,saul4 ,shimei1 with smile1 or scowl1 uncertain which1 ,hatred and pleasure both at once expressed1 ,pleasure of hatred gratified1 with more ,hatred than could be wholly gratified-- ,his pristine aspect worse and worse deformed4 ,sore vexed at heart were all the ,sanhedrim ,that now the victim of their wished despite-- ,thrice the more hated as erst so beloved1 ,christian apostate the once zealot ,jew6-- ,stood there but doubtfully within their power2 ,the ,roman sway had cited him--and them4 ,for1 yesterday1 ,paul in the temple-court ,had with fierce violence been set upon ,by ,jews who thought the holy place profaned ,through his unlawful bringing thither in ,of gentile ,greeks--had there been set upon ,and thence dragged forth with blows that purposed death4 ,but1 as when ,stephen suffered1 so again ,now intervened the ,roman1 and this time ,forbade the turbulence and rescued ,paul-- ,rescued1 but double-bound his hands with chains4 ,demanding then who was the prisoner1 ,and what his crime1 and nothing learning clear ,amid the hubbub loud of various charge1 ,the ,roman chiliarch was conducting ,paul ,into the castle1 by the soldiers borne-- ,hardly so wrested from the eager hands ,of those enraged who thirsted for his blood1 ,and rent the air crying1 ,away with him6-- ,when calmly to his captor-savior1 he ,addressed himself and asked1 ,may ,i to thee ,a few words speak8 ,greek understandest thou8 ,exclaimed the ,roman4 ,art thou then not he1 ,not that ,egyptian1 who but late stirred up ,sedition1 and into the wilderness ,led out a company four thousand strong ,of the ,assassins8 ,i a ,hebrew am1 ,said ,paul1 of ,tarsus in ,cilicia1 ,of no mean city citizen4 ,let me1 ,i pray thee1 speak unto the multitude4 ,permitted1 ,paul1 upon the castle stairs ,standing1 stretched forth his hand in manacles ,unto the tumult surging at his feet1 ,and1 a great silence fallen upon those waves1 ,spoke in the ,hebrew tongue to them and said3 ,brethren and fathers1 my defence hear ye4 7,the silence deepened at the ,hebrew words47 ,a ,jew am ,i1 who1 though in ,tarsus born1 ,was in this city bred and at the feet ,of that ,gamaliel taught the ancestral law ,with every scruple of severity1 ,burning in zeal for ,god1 as now do ye4 ,and ,i this ,way hunted unto the death1 ,sparing from chains and from imprisonment ,nor man nor woman4 ,this will the high priest ,witness1 and all the ,jewish eldership4 ,by these commissioned1 to ,damascus ,i ,journeyed1 that1 thence even1 ,i might hither bring ,for punishment disciples of the ,way4 ,and lo1 as1 journeying1 nigh ,damascus now ,i drew1 at noonday round about me shone ,suddenly a great light from heaven4 ,to earth ,prostrate ,i fell1 and heard a voice that said1 ',saul1 ,saul1 why art thou persecuting me8' ',thou1 thou--who art thou1 ,lord8' ,i said4 ,and ,he3 ',jesus ,i am1 ,jesus of ,nazareth1 ,whom thou art persecuting4' ,those with me ,beheld indeed the light1 but to the voice ,that spake to me were deaf4 ,and ,i then said1 ',what wilt thou1 ,lord1 that ,i should do8' ',arise1' ,said ,he1 'and on into ,damascus go2 ,what thou must do shall there to thee be told4' ,blind-smitten with the glory of the light1 ,into ,damascus guided by the hand ,i came4 ,there1 ,ananias1 a devout ,observer of the law1 of good renown ,with all the ,hebrew ,damascenes1 found me4 ,i felt him1 though ,i saw him not1 as he ,paused standing there before me1 and these words ,spake3 ',brother ,saul1 receive thy sight4' ,and ,i1 ,that selfsame hour my sight receiving1 fixed ,my eyes on ,ananias1 when he said3 ',the ,god of our forefathers hath of thee ,made choice ,his will to know and to behold ,the ,righteous ,one and from ,his mouth a voice ,to hear4 ,for1 witness shalt thou be for ,him ,to all men of the things thou hast beheld ,and heard4 ,and now why lingerest thou8 ,arise ,and be baptized and wash away thy sins1 ,calling upon ,his name4' ,thereafter ,i1 ,unto ,jerusalem returned1 and here ,within the temple praying1 into trance ,passed1 and beheld ,him1 as to me ,he said3 ',haste1 from ,jerusalem to go make speed1 ,for witness will they not from thee receive ,concerning ,me4' ',but1 ,lord1' said ,i1 'they know ,themselves how ,i1 of all men ,i1 imprisoned ,and scourged from synagogue to synagogue ,them that on ,thee believed4 ,and when was shed ,thy martyr ,stephen's blood1 ,i1 also ,i1 ,stood near1 consenting1 and their garments kept ,who slew him4' ,but the ,lord to me replied3 ',depart1 for ,i will send thee forth far hence ,in mission to the ,gentiles-- ,to this word ,the throng to ,paul gave patient ear1 but now-- ,at sign and instigation1 ambushed erst ,in waiting for the moment meet to spring1 ,and springing pregnant from the ready wit ,of ,shimei1 when that hateful hint was heard ,of mission to the ,gentiles through a ,jew-- ,rose an uproar of voices from the crowd1 ,as when winds mingle sea and sky in storm4 ,away with such a fellow from the earth6 ,they cried2 it is not fit that he should live4 ,a wild scene1 for with outcry wild was mixed ,wild gesture2 the whole madding multitude ,rent off their raiment1 and into the air ,dust flung in cloud as where a whirlwind roars4 ,astonished stood the chiliarch at the sight1 ,nor doubted that some monster was the man ,against whom such a storm of clamor raged4 ,he bade bring ,paul within the castle1 there ,bade scourge him that he might his crime confess4 ,already they had bound him for the thongs1 ,when ,paul to the centurion standing by ,said1 ,is it lawful for you then to scourge ,a man that is a ,roman--uncondemned8 ,this the centurion hearing1 straightway he ,went to the chiliarch and abrupt exclaimed3 ,what is it thou art on the point to do8 ,for this man is a ,roman4 ,then to ,paul ,hastens the chiliarch and1 perturbed1 inquires3 ,tell me1 art thou a ,roman8 ,yea1 said ,paul4 ,surprised1 incredulous half1 the chiliarch cried3 ,i with an ample sum that franchise bought4 ,but ,i1 calmly said ,paul1 was thereto born4 ,at that word from their prisoner1 the men ,who ready round him stood the lash to ply ,instantly vanished1 and the chiliarch too ,was panic-stricken--now in doubt no more ,that ,paul a ,roman was1 whom he had bound ,for stripes1 against a law greater than he1 ,nay1 sacred as the sacred majesty ,itself of the ,republic--ancient name ,disguising empire6--law forbidding stripes ,on any flesh that ,roman title owned4 ,paul slept1 in ,roman chains1 the ,christian's sleep1 ,that night1 but ill at ease the chiliarch tossed ,in troubled slumbers4 ,he1 with early morn1 ,to council called the ,jewish ,sanhedrim1 ,set ,paul unbound before them1 and so sought ,the truth to know of what on him was charged4 ,with calmly steadfast eye ,paul faced his foes1 ,but ,shimei smiled in confidence of guile2 ,whatever the accused might seek to say1 ,affront should meet him and torment his pride4 ,paul1 his fixed eyes pointing his moveless aim ,full in the faces of the elders1 said3 ,brethren1 in all good conscience have ,i lived ,in loyalty toward ,god unto this day4 ,on such a claim from such a prisoner1 ,angry the high priest ,ananias cried1 ,smite him upon the mouth6 to those near by4 ,paul flamed in answering righteous wrath1 and said1 ,flashing a lightning from his eyes on him3 ,smite thee shall ,god1 thou whited wall6 ,and thou1 ,sittest thou here to judge me by the law1 ,and1 the law breaking1 biddest me be smitten8 ,the bolted word had flown and found its mark1 ,and ,paul stood quivering with the stern recoil4 ,but the bystanders1 tools of ,shimei1 ,in chorus of well-simulated zeal ,of reverence toward authority1 cried out3 ,the high priest1 then1 of ,god revilest thou8 ,tempting the outraged man to further vent ,volcanic of resentment at his wrong4 ,but ,paul had tutored down his rebel will2 ,meekly he said3 ,brethren1 ,i did not know ,that he the high priest was1 for it is writ1 ',of one that rules thy people speak not ill4' ,through such self-recollection and self-rule1 ,paul1 master of himself once more become1 ,became likewise master of circumstance4 ,marking that ,pharisee and ,sadducee ,made up the assembly1 he1 with prudent choice1 ,as ,pharisee to ,pharisee appealed4 ,brethren1 he cried1 a ,pharisee am ,i1 ,from ,pharisees descended2 for the hope ,and resurrection of the dead it is ,that ,i this day am judged4 ,discord hereon ,arose of ,pharisee with ,sadducee1 ,which atwain rent the whole assembly there4 ,for ,sadducee no resurrection owned1 ,no angel1 and no spirit2 ,pharisee ,these all confessed4 ,a hideous clamor grew1 ,and certain scribes1 who with the ,pharisees ,sided1 rose and1 contending stoutly1 said3 ,no evil find we in this man2 and if1 ,and if so be indeed1 there hath to him ,a spirit spoken1 or an angel-- ,thus ,a hot dissension waxing1 and afraid ,become the chiliarch lest his prisoner be ,in sunder torn1 the soldiery he sent ,to pluck him from amidst the wrangling crowd1 ,and lodge him in the castle4 ,the next night ,the ,lord stood in theophany by ,paul1 ,and said3 ,be of good cheer2 as thou of me ,hast witnessed in ,jerusalem1 so must ,thou also yet witness in ,rome4 ,and ,paul ,was of good cheer in glad obedience1 ,and slept a sleep so leavened with happy dream4 ,but night-long lonely vigil ,shimei kept1 ,stung from repose to study of revenge4 ,at dawn1 his hatch of hell1 quick by the heat ,of brooding hatred in that patient breast1 ,was ready to come forth and stalk abroad4 ',death to apostate ,saul6' his public word1 ',death to that hated man6' was ,shimei's thought4 ,thought not so much1 as law to him of thought1 ,which formed and fixed the habit of the mind2 ,his thought was simply1 ',how to get ,paul slain1' ,his feeling was a hatred bent to slay2 ,now1 bent to slay2 once1 but to torture bent4 ,this1 partly because hatred is like love ,herein1 that it1 by only being1 grows-- ,until1 at last1 usurping quite the man1 ,it overgrows him like a polypus2 ,and partly because plot and act of hate ,sting to find hateful more the hated one1 ,hate against whom is so self-justified4 ,but ,shimei's hate of ,paul1 antipathy ,at first1 deep1 primal1 irreversible1 ,a doom born in him when himself was born1 ,and thence--from that time forth when in the hall ,of council ,saul disdained and flouted him-- ,a conscious1 fostered1 festering grudge become-- ,this hate1 now grown by but persisting long1 ,and much more grown through long self-exercise1 ,had yet1 beyond the private argument1 ,its public ground of warrant for itself4 ,mocker though ,shimei was1 not less was he1 ,to his full measure of sincerity1 ,sincerely in his mockery a ,jew2 ,his nation's scorn of ,jesus was his scorn1 ,and who loved ,jesus for that cause he hated4 ,buoyed and supported by the spirit rife1 ,the common conscience1 of his countrymen1 ,nay1 conscious of approval and acclaim ,without him1 as of genius blithe within ,him1 prompt to indirection and deceit1 ,shimei1 far more than clear and confident1 ,felt also something of the fowler's joy ,in cunning1 as for ,paul his toils he spread4 ,all this2 yet all was not enough to fire ,the hate that burned sevenfold in ,shimei's breast4 ,with all1 there was an alien element ,infused1 ,tartarean fuelling from beneath1 ,a breath of hell to blow his hate so hot4 ,no merely human hatred crucified ,the ,lord of glory and the ,lord of love6 ,no merely human hatred followed ,paul ,on his angelic errand round the world1 ,with scourge1 with ambush1 with imprisonment1 ,and mouth agape to drink that holy blood6 ,forty fanatic ,jews were quickly found ,to bind themselves by a religious oath ,of dreadful imprecation on their heads ,neither to eat nor drink till ,paul was slain4 ,prompt chance to slay him ,shimei promised them2 ,he would procure that1 on the morrow morn1 ,the chiliarch should desire to quit his doubt ,concerning his strange prisoner1 by one more ,test of his cause before the ,sanhedrim4 ,then1 while from the near tower ,antonia1 ,saul ,at leisure to their council-hall was brought1 ,so large a number of sworn arms in league ,might easily1 with rash violence1 breach their way ,to him amid his guard of soldiery1 ,and1 far too suddenly for these to fend1 ,spill his life-blood like water on the ground-- ,whence could not all the power of ,rome again ,gather it up to store his veins withal4 ,so ,shimei plotted1 with the guile of hate2 ,but1 with a wiser guile1 the guile of love1 ,there counterplotted a true heart for ,paul4 ,rachel that ministry of grace had plied ,for ,ruth by ,saul imprisoned1 and for those ,of ,bethany bound with her--where1 meanwhile1 ,she for ,ruth's children happy kept their home-- ,month after month1 with inexhaustible ,sweet patience and bright heart of hope and brave1 ,until1 the soul of persecution slain ,in ,saul converted1 they were all let go ,beneath their wonted roofs at peace to dwell2 ,rachel first welcoming ,ruth safe home once more1 ,and ,ruth then welcoming ,rachel still to bide4 ,but ,lazarus1 toward ,rachel1 to and fro ,daily seen moving1 with that punctual truth ,to tryst so beautiful1 more beautiful ,in her who was herself so beautiful1 ,whose every step1 look1 gesture1 and least speech1 ,or very silence1 seemed a benison-- ,toward ,rachel1 such beheld--a crescent dawn ,brightening upon him to the perfect day1 ,apocalypse of lovely--,lazarus1 ,in secret1 more and more felt his heart drawn1 ,through all the dreaming hours he passed in prison4 ,released at last1 he told his heart to her1 ,and ,rachel learned to yield him love for love2 ,so1 ,saul consenting gladly1 they were wed4 ,the eldest-born of ,rachel now was grown ,a stripling youth1 in face and person fair1 ,fair spoken1 with a winning gift of grace ,in manner1 and a conscious innocence1 ,becoming conscious virtue1 written free ,in legend over all his lineaments1 ,where beamed likewise a bright intelligence1 ,alert1 beyond such years1 with exercise2 ,for ,rachel's had been long a widow's child1 ,and long that widow's only1 as her first4 ,stephen they had named their boy--for memory4 ,it still was dark1 deep dark before the dawn1 ,when ,rachel rose from wrestling sleepless dream ,to rouse her son from happy dreamless sleep4 ,stephen1 said she1 my son1 my heart divines ,danger nigh imminent for one we love4 ,but1 mother1 said the son1 mine uncle ,paul1 ,if him thou meanest1 is safe in citadel4 ,those ,romans1 heathen though they be1 and void ,of pity as the nether millstone is1 ,are yet in their hard way1 and heathen1 just4 ,they have the power1 as they have shown the will1 ,to keep thy brother hedged from ,hebrew hate4 ,from ,hebrew hate1 but not from hellish guile1 ,rachel replied2 and hellish guile1 my son1 ,thy mother's heart1 quickened with sisterhood1 ,and1 from some sad experience of the world1 ,suspicious--nay1 perhaps1 through deep divine ,persuasion by the ,holy ,spirit wrought1 ,intuitive of the future1 and on things ,else hidden1 inly privileged to look-- ,yea1 hellish guile1 my heart1 somehow advised1 ,insists and still insists she knows1 she feels1 ,this hour at work against my brother ,saul4 ,haste1 get thee quickly to ,gamaliel-- ,brief his sleep is1 and he will be awake1 ,for1 with his gathering years1 now nigh five score1 ,lighter and lighter grow his slumbers1 ever ,broken and scattered by the first cockcrow-- ,greet him from me with worship as beseems1 ,and1 telling him my fears1 entreat to know ,if aught that touches his old pupil ,saul1 ,haply an issue from the brooding brain ,of ,shimei to ,saul's hurt1 have reached his ear4 ,be wise1 be wary1 ,stephen1 whet thy sense1 ,fail not to see or hear whatever sign ,glimpses or whispers1 smallest hint that may ,concern the safety of thine uncle ,saul4 ,how knowest thou but thy scouting walk this morn ,shall rescue to the world1 in need so deep1 ,yet many a year of that apostleship8 ,besides1 with such a sun quenched from our sky1 ,what then were day prolonged but night to us8 ,go1 and thy mother here meanwhile will pray3 ',lord1 speed my son1 make him discreet and brave6' ,brave and discreet the boy had need to be2 ,for1 as he went1 amid the rear-guard dense ,of darkness undispersed before the dawn1 ,steering his flying steps along the street1 ,and watching wary1 with tense eye and ear1 ,to every quarter of the dim dumb world-- ,a sudden thwarting ray that disappeared6 ,he paused on tiptoe1 leaning forward1 stood ,one instant1 with his hand behind his ear1 ,to listen1 while his noisy heart he hushed2 ,and heard1 yea1 footsteps1 with a muffled sound ,of human voices sibilant and hoarse4 ,what meant it8 ,nothing1 doubtless1 yet well were ,to be unseen1 and see--if see he might-- ,and hear unheard1 until his way were sure4 ,with supple swift insinuation1 he ,slipped him beneath the slack ungathered length ,of a chance-left rolled tent-cloth at his feet4 ,two men--one bore a lantern1 darkened deep ,behind the outer garment that he wore-- ,drew nigh1 and ,stephen held his breath to hear ,the name of ,saul hissed out between the twain4 ,slow was their gait1 and ever and anon1 ,halting1 they checked their words1 and seemed to list1 ,as if for comrades lingering yet behind4 ,they against ,stephen halted thus1 and he ,lay breathlessly awaiting what might fall4 ,first having paused1 as hearkening from afar-- ,to naught but silence--the two men sat down ,upon that roll of tent-cloth1 thus at ease ,to rest them1 till the waited-for appeared4 ,at ,stephen's very ear1 he in duress ,and forced to hear them1 there those two ill men1 ,complotters in the plot to murder ,paul1 ,unfolded in free converse all their scheme4 ,fiercely the listening boy forbade to cry ,the aching heart of eagerness in him1 ,that almost rived with its desire of vent4 ,fear for himself could not have held him mute2 ,horror and hatred of that wickedness ,swelled swiftly in his breast1 so huge and hard1 ,there must have sprung from out his lips a cry1 ,sharp like an arrow cleaving from its string1 ,had not great love been instant1 stronger yet1 ,binding his heart to burst not1 and be dumb4 ,so there he lay as dead1 so deathlike still1 ,until at length--the waited-for come up-- ,they all went forward thence their purposed way4 ,then ,stephen lithely to his feet upsprung ,and1 sped as with his anguish1 his disdain1 ,his indignation1 to be silent--force ,pent up in him from all escape but speed-- ,swift1 like the roe upon the mountains1 ran ,to find ,gamaliel1 where that ancient sage ,sat on his dewy roof expecting morn4 ,rachel my mother sends ,gamaliel hail1 ,and bids me haste to bring thee instant word6 ,so ,stephen1 with quick-beating heart that broke ,his words to pulses of sobbed sound1 began3 ,she says--but ,i1 in hither coming1 learned ,more than my mother charged me with to thee4 ,lo1 wicked men of our own nation plot ,this day to shed my mother's brother's blood4 ,they will desire the ,roman to send down ,mine uncle ,saul before the ,sanhedrim1 ,to be by these examined once again2 ,but they will set upon him while he comes1 ,and so1 or ever he can rescued be1 ,make of mine uncle ,saul a bloody corpse4 ,o ,rabbi1 master of mine uncle ,saul1 ,beseech thee1 speak1 bid me1 what must ,i do8 ,the old man bent upon the boy his brow1 ,and1 slowly rousing without motion1 said3 ,the world grows gray in wickedness1 my son2 ,what the ,lord ,god of all intends1 who knows8 ,most wise is ,he1 but deep1 in many ways1 ,past human finding out4 ,thine uncle ,saul ,is hated for himself by ,shimei ,yet more than for his cause4 ,and ,shimei ,is doubtless the artificer of this4 ,with inward adjuration then1 a hand ,uplifted as in gesture to repel1 ,gamaliel deeply added1 ,o my soul1 ,into the secret of such man come not6 ,wherewith the aged tremulous lips were mute1 ,though mutely moving still1 as if the words ,said themselves over1 again and yet again1 ,within him1 of that ancient fending spell4 ,stephen1 well-schooled in awe of the hoar head1 ,stood an uneasy instant silent1 then ,yielded to his untamable desire ,of action and impatience of delay4 ,o ,rabban1 he importunately cried1 ,but thy young servant's soul already ,god ,into the secret of this man has brought-- ,doubtless to baffle him--knew ,i but how6 ,yea1 verily1 ,stephen2 also that might chance1 ,gamaliel answered with benignity2 ,he almost let grave admiration breathe1 ,through softly-lighted look and gentle tone1 ,a kind of benediction on the boy1 ,as he1 unhastened1 felt the youthful haste ,that made the stripling ,stephen beautiful2 ,for ,david was a shepherd lad1 when he ,was chosen of ,god to lay ,goliath low4 ,who knows but thou shalt save thine uncle ,saul8 ,i loved him long ago--when thou wast not2 ,he went his way1 and ,i abode in mine1 ,ways widely parting1 but ,i love him still4 ,and ,i would see him yet before ,i die4 ,tell him1 ,gamaliel would see ,saul once more4 ,perhaps1 perhaps1 ,i might dissuade him yet4 ,thine uncle1 lad1 was ever from a youth ,headstrong to think his thought and will his will4 ,no man might bend him from his own fixed bent2 ,if any man1 then ,i2 he honored me1 ,and hearkened reason from ,gamaliel's lips4 ,yea1 send ,saul hither1 ,i would prove if ,i ,have not still left some saving power for him4 ,gamaliel spoke half as from reverie1 ,lapsed in oblivion of the present need4 ,rabban ,gamaliel1 bold upspoke the boy1 ,thy saving power ,i pray thee now put forth ,to pluck mine uncle from the jaws of death4 ,i promise gladly then to bring thee ,saul1 ,if so ,i may1 when1 by thy counsel1 ,i ,have set him safe from those that seek his blood4 ,these have their mouth agape already now1 ,their throat an open sepulcher for him4 ,i see1 ,i see them spring upon their prey-- ,o master1 master1 must he die like this8 ,the passionate pleading boy dropped on his knees1 ,and the knees clasped of the thus roused old man4 ,yea1 ,i remember1 now ,gamaliel spoke2 ,weep not1 my boy1 but haste1 my bidding do4 ,therewith ,gamaliel clapped his aged hands1 ,when instantly a servant to his call ,stood on the roof with1 ,master1 here am ,i4 ,an inkhorn and a pen1 with parchment2 speed6 ,shot from ,gamaliel's lips1 so short1 so sharp ,with instance1 that the man not went1 but flew4 ,make thou a table of my knees1 and write1 ,gamaliel to forestalling ,stephen said2 ,write3 ',i1 ,gamaliel1 send this lad to thee2 ,i know him2 he will tell thee what concerns ,thy hearing2 thou canst trust him all in all4' ,there1 so is well2 now superscribe it fair3 ',to the chief captain of ,antonia4' ,run1 carry this--stay1 ,i must sign it first ,with mine own hand for certainty to him4 ,up1 haste thee to the castle1 ask for ,saul1 ,him tell what thou hast learned1 and show him this2 ,saul will to the chief captain get thee brought1 ,and thou hereby shalt win believing heed4 ,no thanks1 and no farewell1 but thy feet wing6 ,so sped1 but of his own heart better sped1 ,stephen quick got him to the castle gate1 ,where1 with ,gamaliel's seal displayed--his truth1 ,patent in face and voice1 admitting him-- ,he gained prompt privilege of speech with ,paul4 ,paul heard the tidings that his nephew brought ,and1 summoning a centurion1 said to him3 ,pray thee1 to the chief captain take this youth2 ,he has a matter for his private ear4 ,so the centurion1 taking ,stephen1 went ,to the chief captain1 and thus spoke to him3 ,the prisoner ,paul bade me to him and asked ,that ,i would bring this youth to thee1 who has ,a certain matter he would tell thee of4 ,the chiliarch looked at ,stephen glowing there ,before him in the beauty of his youth1 ,a beauty that was more than beauty now1 ,touched and illumined into nobleness ,by the pure ardor of the soul within ,kindling upon the face in flames of zeal-- ,the ,roman1 on the boy ennobled so ,feasting his eye a moment in fixed gaze1 ,caught the contagion of that nobleness4 ,a waft perhaps of reminiscence waked ,blew soft and warm upon his heart from ,rome2 ,clear in the mirror of the ,hebrew boy ,shining in sudden apparition so1 ,fairer than fountain of ,bandusia1 ,there swam perhaps an image to the eye ,of that stern ,roman father1 dear with home2 ,perhaps he thought of a young ,claudius1 ,who1 far away beneath ,italian skies1 ,was blooming crescent in a grace like that1 ,his father exile in ,jerusalem6 ,however wrought on1 ,claudius ,lysias1 ,touched somehow to a mood of gentleness1 ,took ,stephen by the hand and went with him ,apart a little into privacy1 ,and said3 ,and now1 my pretty ,hebrew lad1 ,what matter is it thou hast hither brought8 ,o1 sir1 said ,stephen1 with half-downcast face ,of beautifying shame that he must bear ,such witness unto ,roman against ,jew1 ,there are some ,israelites not of ,israel2 ,pray thee1 judge not my race by this that ,i ,must tell thee of my wicked countrymen4 ,forty vile men have in ,jerusalem1 ,by one the vilest who knows all the vile1 ,been found to bind themselves by oath in league ,together all1 under a dreadful curse1 ,neither to eat nor drink1 till they the best1 ,the noblest1 of their countrymen have slain ,thy prisoner ,paul4 ,these presently will ask1 ,or others speaking for them will--high climbs1 ,sir1 and wide spreads1 this foul conspiracy ,of evil against good1 among the ,jews-- ,they soon will ask that thou to-morrow bring ,thy prisoner before the ,sanhedrim ,as of his cause to certify thyself4 ,but1 while he comes1 those base complotters will1 ,lying in wait for this1 upon him fall ,too quickly for the soldiers to forefend1 ,and slay him as beneath thy very eyes4 ,o1 sir1 do not thou give them their desire4 ,thou lookest truth1 my boy1 the chiliarch said2 ,but a mad bloody plot thou warnest me of4 ,thou knowest these things8 ,but how these things knowest thou8 ,and how shall ,i know that thou knowest these things8 ,how1 too1 that thou speakest truly as thou knowest8' ,my mother is ,paul's sister1 ,stephen said1 ,and she1 all in her secret heart1 divined ,some mischief that impended over him1 ,and bade me hasten to the wise and good ,gamaliel1 counsellor to her and all1 ,and ask if he knew aught1 or aught advised1 ,that touched the safety of her brother2 he ,was once ,gamaliel's pupil well-beloved4 ,it came to pass1 as ,i devoured my way ,through the deep dark before the earliest dawn1 ,whetted to heed whatever might be sign ,of import to the purpose ,i would serve1 ,that a low noise of voices1 and a ray1 ,shot1 so it after proved1 athwart the night ,from out a lantern1 for an instant bare1 ,that some one carried underneath his robe1 ,and1 by pure hap1 or haply for a hint ,from far to comrade1 or to light his course1 ,let shine that moment through the parted folds-- ,it chanced1 ,i say1 that such a sudden sign-- ,for sign ,i found it--made me haste to hide ,where ,i1 unmarked1 might mark1 both eye and ear4 ,o1 sir1 ,god sent those wicked twain so nigh ,me ,i could plainly hear them1 every word1 ,unfold the counsel of their wickedness4 ,as soon as freed by their departure1 ,i ,flew to ,gamaliel1 told him all1 from him ,at last received instruction and strict charge ,to hasten hither1 seek out ,paul1 access ,secure through him to thee1 and in thine hand ,give this1 ,gamaliel's word1 for proof of me4 ,stephen stood silent1 and the chiliarch read2 ,aye1 as ,i thought1 he slowly1 musing1 spoke2 ,i did not doubt thy truth1 my boy1 before1 ,i myself did not1 though the chiliarch did1 ,as by his office bound to scruple deep1 ,and ever doubt1 till doubt by proof be quelled4 ,this well agrees with the wild1 heady way ,of the whole restless1 reckless race of ,jews4 ,they count no cost1 of peril1 or of pain1 ,loss1 labor1 naught2 impossibility ,is but temptation to attempt--in vain4 ,was never city like ,jerusalem1 ,menace of mob in every multitude6 ,well1 well1 my lad1 ,i trust thee1 go thy way1 ,say naught of this to any one abroad2 ,i will take care no harm shall happen ,paul4 ,thou hast well done to bring this word to me2 ,i should have felt it for a vexing thing ,had thus a ,roman in my custody ,disgracefully been slain with violent hands4 ,but thou it seems lovest thy kinsman ,paul2 ,now for thy youth1 and for thy comely face1 ,and for the service thou hast wrought for me1 ,i give thee thy request1 what wilt thou have8 ,be prudent1 so that ,i need not repent1 ,and1 so that thou need not repent1 be bold4 ,ask widely1 wisely1 for thine uncle ,paul4 ,i thank thee1 sir1 for this thy grace to me1 ,said ,stephen2 but for ,paul ,i nothing ask1 ,sure as ,i am he has what he desires2 ,for he has learned in whatsoever state ,he be1 therein to be content--so ,i ,have heard mine uncle say1 in telling what1 ,strange hap and hard to me it often seemed1 ,has him befallen in wandering through the world4 ,still1 if ,i might two things in one desire1 ,though not for ,paul1 yet partly for his sake1 ,i this would crave from thee1 that ,i may here ,bide with mine uncle1 or with1 him go hence1 ,if hence thou sendest him2 that is one thing2 ,and this the other is1 that ,i may bid ,gamaliel hither1 here to visit ,paul4 ,gamaliel wishes to see ,paul once more1 ,and ,paul ,i know would gladly yet again ,greet his belovd master face to face4 ,doubtless the last time it will be to them2 ,for he1 ,gamaliel1 waxes very old1 ,almost five score the tale is of his years4 ,thou askest little2 all is granted thee1 ,the ,roman said1 and that centurion charged3 ,let this lad come and go1 unchecked1 at will1 ,or bide companion with the prisoner ,paul4 ,and thou1 my little ,hebrew1 added he1 ,apart1 behooves thou know the time is short ,for ,paul to tarry in ,antonia4 ,this very night1 ,i send him forth with haste ,to ,csarea from ,jerusalem2 ,both for his safety1 and my quiet1 this4 ,thou shalt go with him1 if thou choose to go4 ,remember that ,i trust thee1 and be dumb4 ,benignantly dismissed thus1 ,stephen first ,home hied him to his mother ,rachel1 her ,told what had fallen and comforted her heart2 ,then to ,gamaliel bore the chiliarch's word1 ,bidding him freely come to visit ,paul4 ,,book ,,ii4 ,,paul ,,and ,,gamaliel4 ,the aged ,gamaliel has his wish and enjoys a prolonged interview with the prisoner ,paul in the castle where the latter is confined--young ,stephen being present4 ,the result is ,gamaliel's conversion to ,christianity2 but this is followed by the old man's peaceful death on the couch where he had been resting while he talked4 ,so peaceful is the death that1 in the darkness of the late evening1 ,paul and young ,stephen are not aware that it has occurred4 ,,paul ,,and ,,gamaliel4 ,his eye now dim1 as too his natural force ,abated--for the long increase of years1 ,each lightly like a gentle white snow-shower ,descending on his shoulders scarcely felt1 ,grew a great weight at length that his tall form ,stooped1 and his steps made gradually slow-- ,gamaliel1 stayed in hand by ,stephen1 walked1 ,gazed on of all with worship where he passed ,gathering the salutations of the street1 ,meet revenue of his reverend age and fame1 ,until he entered at ,antonia gate4 ,paul met his master with a welcoming kiss1 ,then led him forward to a couch1 whereon ,the aged man his limbs to rest composed4 ,there kneeling by him1 ,paul upon his neck ,wept in warm tears the pathos of his love4 ,o great and gentle master of my youth1 ,rabban ,gamaliel1 ,saul1 in many things ,other than he was erst1 is still the same ,in his old love and loyalty to thee6 ,such words ,paul found1 when he his heart could tame ,from inarticulate passion into speech4 ,yea1 changed1 my son1 in many things art thou1 ,gravely ,gamaliel framed reply to ,paul1 ,in many things changed1 and in some things much4 ,thou too1 my son1 art older grown1 like me-- ,nay1 like me1 not4 ,thou art but older2 ,i1 ,past being older1 now am truly old4 ,yet old art thou beyond thy proper years2 ,life has been more than lapse of time to thee1 ,to bleach the youthful raven of thy locks ,to such a whiteness as of whited wool2 ,and all thine aspect is of winter age1 ,closed without autumn on short summer time4 ,it should not grieve me1 but indeed it grieves1 ,to see thee thus before thy season old4 ,i could have wished to live myself in thee1 ,hereafter1 a long life of use again1 ,as that good ,hillel lived--not worthily-- ,again in me1 ,gamaliel1 hastening hence1 ,i now1 less happy1 none inheriting me4 ,as my soul's son1 ,o ,saul1 ,i counted thee1 ,thee1 chosen of all my pupils to such kin2 ,that thou1 of all1 shouldst separate thyself ,from the good part1 and from thy father's side1 ,to choose thy lot with aliens and with foes6 ,what ruin of what hope6 ,already now1 ,the prime1 the flower1 the glory1 of the strength ,unmatchable for promise that was ,saul1 ,spent1 squandered1 irrecoverably waste6 ,nor this even yet the worst2 for1 worse than waste1 ,saul has all used to rend what was to mend1 ,to scatter what to gather need was sore1 ,and what asked wise upbuilding to pull down4 ,o ,saul1 ,saul1 ,saul1 my son1 what hast thou wrought6 ,o ,israel1 ,o my people1 this from ,saul6 ,the old man shook1 ceasing1 with tearless sobs1 ,and in hands trembling hid his face from ,paul4 ,paul silently a moment bowed himself-- ,like blinded ,samson leaning hard against ,the pillars of the palace of the lords ,philistine1 so ,paul bowed himself against ,the pillars of ,gamaliel's house of trust1 ,in one great throe and agony of prayer2 ,then said3 ,o thou hoar head most reverend1 ,my master1 how those words of thine pierce me6 ,far1 far more easily have ,i born all ills1 ,though many and heavy1 that on me have fallen1 ,than now such words ,i hear of pained reproach1 ,thrice grievous as thus gracious1 from thy lips4 ,how shall ,i find wherewith to answer thee8 ,i think thou knowest1 my master1 that ,i love ,my nation1 and a thousand times would die ,to save from death my kindred in the flesh4 ,not willingly do ,i seem even to rend ,the oneness of my people so asunder4 ,scatter ,i do not1 if ,i seem to scatter3 ,i sift and choose1 and cast the bad away2 ,that is not scattering1 it is gathering rather4 ,nor is it ,i do this1 but by me ,god4 ,reprobate silver still some souls will be1 ,and rightly so men call them1 for the ,lord1 ,he hath rejected them1 the judging ,lord4 ,this is that word of ,malachi fulfilled-- ,whom also thou1 ,o master1 once1 inspired ,perhaps1 beyond our dreaming1 from the ,lord1 ,recalledst1 when our seventy elders sat ,consulting how most prudently they might ,slay those apostles of the ,nazarene4 ,thou warnedst us more wisely than our hearts ,were meekly wise enough1 enough to heed4 ,for1 ',the ,lord cometh1' saidst thou then1 and1 ',who ,of us1' thou askedst1 'who of us shall bide ,the day of that approach8' ',not surely he1' ,thou answeredst1 prophet-wise1 'surely not he1 ,then found in arms against ,god and ,his ,christ4' ,and did not ,malachi foretell that ,he1 ,the ,angel of the covenant1 should sit ,as a refiner and a purifier1 ,to purge the sons of ,levi of their dross8 ,so sits ,he now1 attending in the heavens1 ,until appear a people purified1 ,israel gathered out of ,israel1 ,a chosen peculiar people for ,himself4 ,thou knowest how ,i hated once this name1 ,and persecuted to the death ,his church4 ,i raged against ,jehovah2 mad and blind1 ,on the thick bosses of ,his buckler rushed4 ,but ,he1 ,jehovah1 met me in the way ,with ,his sword drawn and slew me where ,i stood4 ,one stroke1 like living lightning1 and ,i fell2 ,saul was no more1 but in his stead was ,paul4 ,paul therewith paused1 awaiting2 for he saw ,a motion change the listener's attitude4 ,gamaliel turned toward ,paul1 and looked at him1 ,a grave1 a sad1 inquiry in the gaze4 ,what dost thou mean8 almost severely he1 ,with something of his magisterial wont1 ,inveterate1 in the gesture of his eye ,and in his tone expressed1 now said to ,paul3 ,what dost thou mean8 ,thou riddlest thus with me4 ,the ,lord slew thee1 then made alive again ,not thy slain self1 but some new other man6 ,meet is it thou shouldst speak in parable ,thus to thy master in his hoary age8 ,plain1 and forthwith1 what meanest thou1 son ,saul8 ,i would not vex with darkened words thine ear1 ,my master1 gently deprecated ,paul2 ,but otherwise how can ,i1 than in words ,dark-seeming1 frame of things ineffable ,shadow or image only8 ,god revealed ,his ,son in me2 thenceforth no longer ,i ,lived1 but ,christ in me4 ,i am not myself4 ,the self that once was ,i1 was crucified ,with ,jesus on that cross1 with ,jesus then ,was buried1 and with ,jesus rose again1 ,to be forever other than before4 ,i journeyed to ,damascus glorying1 ,in my old heart1 the heart thou knewest for ,saul1 ,against the name1 and those that owned the name1 ,of ,jesus1 to destroy them from the earth4 ,but ,jesus1 in a terror of great light1 ,met me and smote me prostrate on the ground4 ,a voice therewith ,i heard1 the voice was wide1 ,and all my members seemed one ear to hear ,that voice1 which shone too1 like the light around ,me that had quenched the midday sun2 it pressed ,at every pore with importunity ,so dreadful that the world became a sound3 ',saul1 ,saul1 why art thou persecuting me8' ',who art thou1 ,lord8' my trembling flesh inquired4 ',jesus ,i am whom thou dost persecute1' ,i heard through all my members in reply4 ,i cannot tell thee1 master1 how my soul1 ,all naked of its flesh investiture1 ,lay quivering to the touch of sight and sound4 ,into annihilation crushed1 my pride1 ,my pride1 my hate1 the fury of my zeal1 ,the folly and the fury of my zeal ,against ,god and ,his ,christ1 were not1 and ,i ,myself was not1 but ,christ in me was all4 ,thenceforth to me to live was ,christ1 and ,christ ,none other than that ,man of ,calvary1 ,the ,jesus whom we crucified and slew4 ,rabban ,gamaliel1 then knew ,i that ,god ,had visited ,his people otherwise ,than we were used to dream that ,he would come1 ,in glory1 and in splendor1 and in power1 ,to overwhelm our enemies1 and us ,to the high places of the earth lift up4 ,yea1 otherwise1 far otherwise1 than so1 ,had our ,god visited ,his people--hid ,that glory which no man could see and live-- ,sojourning in the person of one born ,lowly1 to teach us that the lowly place1 ,and not the lordly1 is for us to choose4 ,whoso the lowly place shall choose1 and1 prone ,before ,jehovah humbled to be man ,in ,jesus ,christ of ,nazareth1 fall down ,to worship1 and1 believing1 to obey1 ,him will the ,lord ,god show ,himself unto1 ,since unto such ,he can1 such being like ,himself and able to behold ,his face4 ,silence between them1 silence filled to ,paul ,with intercession of the ,spirit1 ,he ,in groanings that could not be uttered praying2 ,and to ,gamaliel silence filled with awe4 ,a pride not inaccessible to touch ,from the divine1 and not incapable ,of moments almost like humility1 ,was nature to ,gamaliel that sometimes ,renewed him in his spirit to a child4 ,he lay now like an infant tremulous ,that feels the motion of the mother's breast1 ,but other motion1 of its own1 has not4 ,the awful powers of the world to come1 ,benign but awful1 brooded over him2 ,eternity a ,presence watching ,time6 ,such breathless silence of the elder twain ,left audible the breathing of the boy1 ,young ,stephen1 who1 worn weary with his hours ,of over-early anxious walk and watch1 ,had found the happy haven1 ever nigh ,to youth and health and innocence o'erwrought1 ,and dropped his anchors in the sounds of sleep4 ,thus then stretched out remiss upon the floor1 ,as if unconscious body without soul1 ,lay ,stephen slumbering there1 beside those two ,so wakeful that each might in contrast seem ,soul only1 without body1 soul disclad4 ,a blast1 not loud1 of trumpet sudden blown ,for signal1 and a clangor as of stir ,responsive from the maild feet of men1 ,broke on the stillness from the court without4 ,gamaliel1 rousing from his reverie1 ,gazed deep on ,paul1 who met his master's eye-- ,gazed long and deep with slow-perusing look4 ,look on me1 ,saul1 and let me look on thee1 ,at length ,gamaliel said1 look on thee still2 ,steady thine eye1 if that thou canst1 my son1 ,and my look take1 unruffled1 like a spring ,sunken beneath the winging of the wind2 ,stay1 let me sound within thee to the deeps1 ,and touch the bottom of thy being1 there ,at leisure with mine eye the truth explore4 ,be pure and simple1 if thou mayest2 cloud not ,my seeing with aught other than sincere1 ,nor cross with baffling thwart perversity4 ,gamaliel1 leaning on his elbow1 fast ,his aged vision1 like an eagle's1 fixed ,on ,paul1 and through the windows of his soul1 ,wide open1 as into a crystal sky ,gazing1 beheld his thoughts orbed into stars4 ,half disappointed and half satisfied1 ,the gazer slowly let the look intense ,fade from his eyes1 and pass into a deep ,withdrawn expression1 as of one who sees1 ,unseeing1 things without1 and wraps his mind ,in contemplations of an inward world4 ,no conscious falseness1 murmured he1 aloud1 ,yet inly1 as communing with himself2 ,no conscious falseness there1 the same clear truth ,that ever was the character of ,saul2 ,no falseness1 and no subtle secret flaw1 ,unconscious1 in the soundness of the mind2 ,the same sane sense that marked him from of old4 ,he has been deceived2 how could he be deceived8 ,that light which fell around him at mid-noon1 ,who counterfeited that8 ,it might have been ,force from the sun that smote him in the brain1 ,as he was smitten whom ,elisha healed1 ,that son of promise to the ,shunammite-- ,nay1 that had made a darkness1 and not light1 ,to him1 and dulled his senses not to hear1 ,and dulled his fancy not to feign1 such voice ,as that which spake so dreadfully to him4 ,astounding voice1 that uttered human speech ,and yet1 like thunder1 occupied the world6 ,did ,saul discern the tongue in which it spake8 ,perhaps some mere illusion of the mind1 ,whimsical contradiction to the thought ,that had so long been uppermost therein1 ,imposed itself upon him for the truth2 ,perhaps some automatic stroke reverse ,of overwrought imagination made ,a momentary1 irresponsible ,conceit of fancy seem a fact of sense2 ,perhaps1 not hearing1 he but deemed he heard4 ,if he distinguished clearly what the tongue ,was of the voice that spake1 then--,i will ask ,and see4 ,those words1 ,saul1 which thou seemedst to hear1 ,what were they1 ,greek or ,hebrew8 ,didst thou heed ,so as to mark the manner of the speech1 ,or peradventure but the meaning take8 ,hebrew the words were1 master1 ,saul replied2 ,if ever it were possible for me ,to lose them from my memory1 mine ear ,would hear their haunting echo evermore4 ,such light1 such sound1 forsake the senses never4 ,o master1 when ,god speaks to man1 doubt not ,he finds the means to certify ,himself4 ,let ,him now certify ,himself to thee1 ,through me1 me the least worthy of such grace1 ,to be ambassador of grace from ,him6 ,paul's words were not so eloquent as ,paul4 ,he to such conscious noble dignity ,joined such supreme effacement of himself2 ,burned with such zeal devoid of eagerness2 ,a manner of entreaty that was his1 ,not for his own1 but all for other's sake1 ,made such a sweet chastised persuasiveness1 ,from self-regarding purpose purified2 ,meekness of wisdom such clothed on the man ,with an investiture of awfulness2 ,while1 fairer yet1 a most unworldly light1 ,a soft celestial radiancy1 diffused1 ,self-luminous1 illuminating all1 ,the light divine of supernatural love1 ,upon him from a sacred source unseen ,flung such a flush1 like sunrise on some peak ,of lonely height first to salute the sun2 ,that ,paul1 to whoso had beholding eyes1 ,shone as a milder new theophany4 ,gamaliel had not eyes for all he saw4 ,he slowly from his leaning posture sank ,relapsed upon the couch1 clasping his hands4 ,half to himself and half to ,paul1 he spoke3 ,my mind is sore divided with itself4 ,it is as if the heavenly firmament ,were shifted half way round upon its pole1 ,and east to west were changed1 and west to east2 ,all things seem opposite to what they were4 ,strange1 strange1 incomprehensible to me6 ,but strangest1 most incomprehensible1 ,thou1 what thou art to what thou wast1 ,o ,saul6 ,thou wast1 though ever not ungentle1 proud ,ever1 the proudest of the ,pharisees4 ,i loved thee1 ,i admired thee1 for thy pride4 ,pride did not seem like arrogance in thee1 ,but meet assumption of thy proper worth2 ,rather1 such air in thee1 as if thou woredst ,a mantle of thy nation's dignity1 ,committed by the suffrages of all ,unto the worthiest to be worthily worn4 ,and now this ,saul1 our paragon of pride1 ,through whom our suffering nation felt herself ,uplifted from the dust of servitude1 ,in prophecy by example1 to her true1 ,long-forfeited inheritance1 to be ,one day restored to her1 of regal state-- ,this ,saul ,i see beside me here a gray ,old man humbling himself1 humbling his race1 ,in abject posture of prostration bowed ,before--whom8 ,why1 nobody in the world6 ,before--what8 ,why1 the phantom of a man ,led through low life to malefactor's death6 ,impossible transformation1 to have passed ,upon that proud high ,saul whom once ,i knew2 ,impossible perversion1 baffling me6 ,impossible1 but that with mine own eyes1 ,but that with mine own ears1 ,i witness it4 ,in simple helpless wonder and amaze ,more than in wroth rejection scorn-inspired1 ,gamaliel thus had uttered forth his heart4 ,paul had his answer1 but he held it back1 ,respectfully awaiting further word ,seen ripe and ready on ,gamaliel's lips4 ,a question1 still of wonder1 soon it came3 ,tell me1 what hast thou gained1 in all these years ,of thy most strange discipleship1 my son8 ,a pathos of compassion tuned the tone ,with which ,gamaliel so appealed to ,paul4 ,paul1 with a pathos of sweet cheerfulness1 ,in dark and bright of paradox replied3 ,gained8 ,i have gained of many things great store2 ,much hatred from my erring countrymen2 ,much chance of thankless service for their sake2 ,stripes many1 manacles1 imprisonments1 ,beatings with rods1 bruisings with stones1 shipwrecks1 ,a night and day of tossing in the deep2 ,far homeless wanderings up and down the world2 ,perils on perils multiplied1 no end1 ,perils of water--wave and torrent flood-- ,perils by mine own countrymen enraged1 ,perils from heathen hands1 perils pursued ,upon me1 ceasing not1 wherever men ,in city gather1 or in wilderness2 ,in the waste sea1 still perils2 perils still ,among false brethren2 these1 and weariness ,with painfulness1 long watchings without sleep1 ,hunger and thirst endured1 oft fastings fierce1 ,cold to the marrow1 shuddering nakedness4 ,such things without1 to wear and waste the flesh1 ,and then beside1 the suffering of the spirit ,in care that comes upon me day by day ,for all the scattered churches of the ,lord4 ,i have not missed good wages duly paid2 ,gain has been mine in every kind of loss4 ,paul's answer turned ,gamaliel's sentiment ,into pure wonder1 pity purged away4 ,deeper and deeper in perplexity ,sank the old man1 the more in thought he strove2 ,as when the swallow of a quicksand sucks ,downward but faster one who writhes in vain4 ,silent he listening lay1 and ,paul went on3 ,i have thus counted as the vain world counts1 ,summing the gains of my apostleship4 ,i myself reckon otherwise than thus4 ,for1 what was gain to me1 in that old state ,wherein thou knewest thy disciple ,saul1 ,this count ,i now but only loss and dross1 ,yea1 all things count but dross1 all things save one1 ,to know ,christ ,jesus1 and be known of ,him4 ,that knowledge is the one true treasure mine2 ,true1 for eternal2 mine1 for not the world1 ,nor life1 nor death1 nor present things1 nor things ,to come1 nor height1 nor depth1 nor aught beside ,created in the universe of ,god1 ,can from me wrest this one true good away4 ,i have had sorrow1 but amid it joy2 ,pain has been mine1 but hidden in it peace2 ,rest1 deeper than the weariness1 has still ,my much-abounding weariness beguiled2 ,immortal food my hunger has assuaged1 ,and drink of everlasting life1 my thirst4 ,i have sung praises in imprisonment1 ,at midnight1 with my feet fast in the stocks1 ,and my back bleeding raw from ,roman rods2 ,so much the spirit of glory and of power ,prevailed to make me conqueror of ill4 ,tossed in whatever sea of bitterness1 ,wide as the world1 and weltering with waves1 ,a fountain of sweet water still ,i find ,fresh as from ,elim rising to my lips4 ,a parable in paradox1 sayest thou1 ,but-- ,stephen here his eyes wide open laid ,and looked a look of simple love on ,paul4 ,his sleep had sudden-perfect been1 as night ,at the equator instantly is dark2 ,and now1 as day at the equator dawns ,full splendor1 and no twilight of degrees1 ,so ,stephen was at once and all awake4 ,he straight1 without surprise1 remembered all1 ,or1 needing not remember1 recognized4 ,paul caught his nephew's upward look of love1 ,and sheathed it in the light of his own eyes1 ,which1 downward bent a moment on the boy1 ,gave him his gift with usury again4 ,behold1 said ,paul1 my parable made plain ,by parable not dark with paradox4 ,a sea of bitterness was yesterday ,poured round me in that madding multitude ,that tossed me on the shoulders of its waves2 ,but here is this my loving nephew1 ,stephen1 ,a fountain of sweet water in the sea-- ,art thou not1 ,stephen8--whence to drink my fill4 ,but this is parable of parable2 ,no more--for what ,i mean is still to speak4 ,know1 then1 there is no earthly accident ,of evil that has happened me1 or can ,happen1 nay1 and no swelling flood of such1 ,of any power at all to touch with harm ,the peace that passeth understanding1 fixed ,by ,jesus in my inward firmament2 ,the sea less vainly might assail the stars4 ,if this thou meanest1 ,gamaliel1 groping1 said1 ,that when the angry people yesterday ,bore thee headlong and menaced death to thee1 ,then thou wert calm at heart1 feeling no fear-- ,what else were that than boasting1 ',i am brave1' ,which but such vaunt of it could bring in doubt8 ,nay1 master1 ,paul said1 braggart am ,i not1 ,as justly thou hast signified no brave ,man can be2 and the peace whereof ,i speak ,is not the calmness that the brave man drinks ,out of the cup of danger at his lips4 ,that also ,i perhaps have sometimes known2 ,but this is other1 and a mystery ,even to myself1 who only have1 and not ,the secret of the having understand-- ,save that ,i know it no virtue1 but a gift ,renewed forever from the grace of ,christ4 ,gamaliel listened deeply1 with shut eyes2 ,he listened1 and kept silence1 and then sighed1 ,a long1 considerate sigh1 and unresolved4 ,his struggling reason could not right itself2 ,it staggered like a vessel in the sea ,that cuff and buffet of the storm has left ,a hulk1 dismasted1 rudderless1 forlorn1 ,wedged between waves rocking her to and fro1 ,and threatening to engulf her in the deep2 ,so there ,gamaliel swayed1 with surge on surge ,of thought and passion sweeping over him1 ,till now he trembled on the point to sink4 ,paul saw the old man's state1 and1 pitying him1 ,knew how to shed a balm upon the waves4 ,with a low voice1 daughter of silence1 he ,slowly intoned a soft1 melodious psalm3 ',not haughty is my heart1 ,o ,god the ,lord1 ,nor do mine eyes ambitiously aspire2 ,in great affairs ,i exercise me not1 ,and not in things too wonderful for me4 ,yea1 ,i have stilled and quieted my soul2 ,as with its mother a new-weand child1 ,so is my soul a weand child with me4 ,o ,israel1 hope thou1 in ,jehovah hope1 ,from this time forth and even forevermore6' ,the mood1 all melting1 of that monody-- ,less monody1 than sound of sobbing ceased-- ,its cradling gentle lullaby to pride1 ,went1 subtly permeant1 through ,gamaliel's soul1 ,and mastered it to sympathy of calm4 ,paul saw with pleasure this effect1 and wished ,the too much shaken old man venerable ,might taste the soothing medicine of sleep4 ,not pausing1 he1 with ever softer tone ,verging toward silence1 over and over again ,crooned like a cradle melody that psalm2 ,till1 as that vexing spirit in ,saul the king ,once yielded to young ,david's harping1 so ,now even the fluttering of the aged flesh ,owned a strange power reverse to cancel it1 ,hid in the vibrant pulsing of ,paul's voice1 ,its flexures and its cadences1 that matched ,the meaning with the music2 lulled to rest1 ,gamaliel lightly1 like an infant1 slept4 ,hist6 ,haste6 ,so ,paul to ,stephen signed and said2 ,hence1 and bring hither quickly bread and wine1 ,wherewith to cheer ,gamaliel when he wakes2 ,he sleeps now1 weary with unwonted thought4 ,shimei saw ,stephen from the fort come out ,and bear purveyance back of bread and wine2 ,so1 earlier1 he had seen ,gamaliel pass1 ,led by the hand of ,stephen1 through the gate1 ,presumably to visit ,paul within4 ,for he1 as ever when some crime he teemed1 ,uneasy till the full-accomplished birth1 ,was like the hungry hunting hound denied ,access to his wished prey1 known to be near-- ,though thus from touch1 as too from sight1 withdrawn1 ,and only by the teasd nostril snuffed-- ,who cannot cease from patient jealous watch1 ,on haunches sitting1 or on belly prone1 ,lest somehow yet he miss his taste of blood-- ,so that ill spirit all day had scented ,paul1 ,shut up within the castle out of reach1 ,and sedulously studied1 at remove1 ,whatever might be token of attempt1 ,other's or his1 the morrow's doom to cheat4 ,the very thought1 ',should he slip through our hands6' ,was anguish1 like a goad1 to ,shimei1 ,who now was sure he had the hope divined ,that ,paul was harboring--an escape by night6 ',paul1 in the darkness1 stealing out disguised ,as old ,gamaliel1 would1 with meat and drink ,supplied him1 safety seek in distant flight4' ,filled with such thought1 the tireless crafty ,jew1 ,colluding with the sentry at the gate1 ,there sat him down the sentry's watch to share2 ,paul should by no such stratagem avoid ,the vengeance that next morrow waited him4 ,but ,paul and ,stephen1 guileless1 of the guile ,imputed dreamed not2 they with happy thought ,contented them until ,gamaliel woke4 ,then when ,gamaliel woke1 they gave him wine1 ,pure from the grape1 so much as heartened him1 ,and bread that strengthened him1 from fasting faint4 ,discourse then followed1 eased with many a change ,from theme to theme1 from mood to mood diverse1 ,until the long daylight was waned away1 ,and twilight deepened round them talking still4 ,gamaliel1 in whatever various vein ,of converse with his outward mind employed1 ,was ever1 in his deeper inward mind1 ,resistlessly drawn backward to the doubt1 ,the question1 the perplexity1 the fear1 ',saul--is he right8 ,and is ,gamaliel wrong8 ,and have ,i missed to know the ,christ of ,god8' ,he gazed abstractedly on ,paul1 beheld ,so different2 less in outer aspect changed-- ,although therein1 too1 other--than in act1 ,in gesture and in attitude of soul1 ,the spirit and the motive of the man1 ,transfigured from the pride that once was ,saul4 ,i do not know thee1 ,saul1 at length he said2 ,nay1 nay1 not ,saul--,i should not call him ,saul1 ,this is some different man from him ,i knew1 ,in other years long gone1 and called him ,saul6 ,such difference in the same the sameness makes ,impossible4 ,impossible1 but that ,the sameness still in difference survives ,persistently4 ,the impossible itself ,i must believe--when ,i behold it4 ,yea1 ,paul said1 and more1 the impossible become1 ,when ,god so wills it2 as for me ,he willed6 ,my life these many years1 my self1 has been ,one contradiction of the possible4 ,the reconcilement of all things in ,christ ,is ,god the ,blessed's purpose and decree4 ,for ,god delights in the impossible4 ,gamaliel did not heed1 but murmuring spoke1 ,in absent deep communion with himself3 ,saul1 ,paul1 the same still1 and so changed1 so changed6 ,and cause of change none other than that stroke1 ,that lightning-stroke he tells of1 launched on him ,from out a cloudless sky at blazing noon6 ,whence1 and what was it1 that stupendous blow6 ,would ,he have lied ,who flashed it blinding down8 ,or suffered any liar to claim it his8 ,and the dread ,voice made answer3 ',it is ,i1 ,jesus of ,nazareth1 the ,crucified4' ,lo1 my whole head is sick1 my whole heart faint1 ,turned dizzy with the whirl of many thoughts-- ,thoughts many1 and too violently strange1 ,for a worn-weary aged mind like mine6 ,i feel ,i am too feeble to abide ,much longer all this tumult of my heart2 ,i shall myself cease1 if it does not cease4 ,and peradventure cease it would1 could ,i ,stop striving1 and give up to be a child4 ,a child once more6 ,ah1 that in truth were sweet1 ,to find some bosom like a mother's1 where ,i might lay down my aching head to rest1 ,this head1 so hoar1 the foolish think so wise6 ,old1 but not wise1 not wise indeed though old2 ,in weakness--would it were in meekness too6-- ,a child1 leaning1 with none to lean upon-- ,such is ,gamaliel in his hoary age6 ,besides his words1 the old man's yearning look ,bore witness to the trouble of his mind4 ,paul spoke--so gently that the sense he gave ,seemed to ,gamaliel almost his own thought3 ',come unto ,me1' ,messiah ,jesus said1 ',come unto ,me1' as ,who had right1 said1 'ye ,that labor and are heavy-laden1 all1 ,come unto ,me and ,i will give you rest4 ,my yoke upon you take1 and learn of ,me2 ,for meek am ,i in heart1 and lowly2 so ,shall ye find rest unto your souls4 ,from ,paul ,no more2 for1 all as if he naught had heard1 ,but only was remembering what he heard1 ,gamaliel went on musing audibly3 ',rest'--comfortable word6 ,but he was young ,that spake thus1 young1 and in the law unlearned2 ,and of a yoke spake he1 ',my yoke1' he said4 ,surely ,i am too old to go to school1 ,too reverend-old1 my neck so late to bend1 ,a sign to all the people--stooped to take ,meekly that youngster ,galilan's yoke6 ,beware1 beware6 ,i tremble at the words ,i speak4 ,i feel the dreadful presence here1 ,more dreadful1 of the power that shook me so1 ,when those apostles of the ,nazarene ,stood up before our council to be judged4 ,if ,i should now1 this last time1 err through pride6 ,the murmur of ,gamaliel's musing ceased2 ,but ceased not the strong crying without words ,in ,paul's heart for his master so bestead4 ,the solemn silence of that prison cell1 ,less broken than accented by the tread ,monotonous and measured heard without ,of the dull sentry pacing to and fro ,his beat along the way before the door ,more like mechanic pendulum than man2 ,the darkness of the place now utter1 night ,full come1 no lamp2 the awe1 the dread suspense ,unspeakable of such an issue poised1 ,eternity in doubtful balance there ,a-tremble on a razor-edge of time-- ,this even on ,stephen's bright young spirit cast ,as if a shadow from the world to come2 ,he parted with it after nevermore ,the vivid certainty1 that moment seized1 ,of an ,unseen1 more real1 beyond the ,seen4 ,but presently ,gamaliel yet again ,mused audibly in murmur as before3 ,i fear me ,i shall fail1 and not let go ,betimes the hold ,i have1 the hold has me1 ,say rather1 this fierce hold upon myself ,and mine own righteousness so dearly earned1 ,to take the fall proposed1 the shuddering fall1 ,through emptiness and that waste waiting deep ,of nothing under me1 in hope to reach ,at last--what rescue1 or what landing-place8 ,rest in the arms once pinioned to the cross6 ,he draws me with ,his heavenly-uttered ',come'6 ,this is ,god's voice2 ,god's voice ,i must obey-- ,yea1 ,lord1 thy servant heareth1 and ,i come4 ,i say it1 but ,i do it not4 ,too late8 ,what if at last ,i prove to hold too hard ,upon myself1 and not undo my hand1 ,grown stiff with holding long1 until too late6 ,these are my last heart-beats1 and with the last1 ,the very last1 what would ,i do8 ,resist8 ,resist1 or yield8 ,oh1 not resist1 but yield2 ,lord1 help me not resist1 but yield1 but yield-- ,the faltering utterance failed1 suspended2 then1 ,to a new key transposed1 went faltering on3 ,this peace within my breast1 the peace of ,god6 ,jesus1 ,thou ,son of ,blessd ,god ,most ,high1 ,i know ,thee by the token of ,thy peace6 ,thine is this peace1 not given as by the world4 ,thou wast beforehand with ,thy servant2 ,i ,had not known ,thee1 hadst ,thou not first known me1 ,and hastened to be gracious1 ere ,i died4 ,thou art most gracious1 and ,i worship ,thee4 ,what was it ,simeon said8--',now lettest ,thou ,thy servant hence depart in peace1' for ,i-- ,in peace1 in peace1 even ,i--yea1 for mine eyes1 ,mine also1 most unworthy1 have beheld ,the light of ,thy salvation1 ,o my ,god6 ,oh1 peace ineffable6 ,it seems to steal ,through all my members and dispose to rest4 ,i think that ,i will sleep2 ,i am at peace4 ,my heart has quieted itself1 peace1 peace-- ,the words died into silence audible2 ,soft1 like a wavelet sinking1 ceased his breath1 ,and there ,gamaliel lay1 a breathless peace4 ,paul joyful1 knowing that his aged friend ,had found peace in believing1 did not dream ,that it had been the last of life for him1 ,the first of life indeed1 ,paul would have deemed2 ,but thinking1 ',he has fallen asleep once more1' ,gave silent thanks to ,god and himself slept1 ,with ,stephen then already safe asleep4 ,when1 with the earliest dawn1 four elders came1 ,gamaliel's equals1 to ,antonia1 ,in reverent wise to bear him thence away1 ,they found the many-wrinkled brow that was1 ,smoothed out most placid fair1 and on the cheek ,a bloomy heavenly hue1 as if of youth ,revived1 or immortality begun4 ,but ,paul and ,stephen1 summoned to depart1 ,the sleeper's sleep were minded not to break2 ,there in the dead and middle of the night1 ,they knelt to kiss the forehead in farewell1 ,and were surprised to feel the touch was cold4 ,,book ,,iii4 ,,shimei ,,and ,,the ,,chiliarch4 ,paul1 accompanied by young ,stephen1 is started at about midnight1 under strong military escort1 for ,csarea4 ,at the gate of the castle1 ,shimei1 lurking there1 is arrested1 and brought before the chiliarch1 ,claudius ,lysias by name4 ,a conversation ensues1 in which ,shimei1 for a time with some success1 practises on the chiliarch his characteristic arts of deception4 ,at last1 the chiliarch1 denouncing him for what he is1 and putting him under heavy bonds to respond in person1 whenever and wherever afterward commanded by the ,roman authorities1 dismisses him from presence1 chagrined and dismayed4 ,,shimei ,,and ,,the ,,chiliarch4 ,ere midnight1 had reveill to those twain ,sounded1 and from brief slumber rallied them4 ,they passed from the surprise of that farewell ,kissed on the coolness of ,gamaliel's brow-- ,he his reveill waiting from the trump ,of resurrection1 tranced in happy sleep6-- ,from this passed ,paul and ,stephen to the court ,without1 where stood1 made ready in array1 ,five hundred ,roman soldiers1 foot and horse1 ,filling the place with frequence and ferment4 ,armed men1 and horses in caparison1 ,and saddled asses thick together poured-- ,all was alive with motion and with sound4 ,there was the stamping hoof of restless steed1 ,the rattling bridle-rein1 the bridle-bit ,champed hoary1 the impatient toss of head ,shaking the mane disheveled1 and with foam ,flecking the breast1 the shoulder1 and the flank1 ,eruptive snort from nostril and from lip1 ,the ass's long and melancholy bray1 ,horse's salute of recognition neighed ,to greet some fellow welcomed in the throng1 ,therewith1 voices of men1 scuffle of feet-- ,all under bickering light and shadow flung ,from torches1 fixed or moving1 fume and flame4 ,to ,paul and ,stephen sharp the contrast was ,between that quietude and this turmoil1 ,sleeping ,gamaliel and these urgent men6 ,but ,paul his peace held fast amid it all1 ,peace1 yet a posture girded and alert2 ,while ,stephen1 hanging on his uncle's eye1 ,caught the contagion of that heedful calm4 ,the natural pathos of one fond regret ,ached in the heart of ,paul1 a hoarded pain-- ,his wish1 denied him1 to have given in charge1 ,before he went1 ,gamaliel's lifeless form1 ,if to the keeping of his kindred not1 ,at least to ,roman care and piety2 ,amid the hurly-burly of the hour1 ,no chance of speech1 with any that would heed1 ,for ,jewish prisoner hurried thence by night6 ,but ,paul's reverd friend1 safe fallen asleep ,in ,jesus1 beyond care or want was blest2 ,yea1 and the human reverence of great death1 ,toward one in death so reverend great as he1 ,well might be trusted1 for such clay to win1 ,through kindred care1 the sepulture most meet4 ,yet ,paul1 come to ,antipatris1 and there ,left with the horsemen only thence to ride1 ,a needless careful message touching this ,gave to the chief of the returning foot4 ,when to the chiliarch's ear such word was brought1 ,that captain deeply mused it in his mind-- ,to find it throw a most unlooked-for light ,on certain dark alternatives of doubt ,that had meanwhile his judgment sore perplexed4 ,lowly upon an ass they seated ,paul1 ,and ,stephen1 likewise mounted1 ranged beside4 ,then those appointed to prick forth before1 ,out through the two-leaved gate at sign withdrawn1 ,were issuing on the street in order due1 ,when the proud prudent steed that led the way ,swerved1 and1 with mighty surge of rash recoil1 ,had nigh his rider from the saddle thrown4 ,he1 his fine nostril wide distended1 snuffed ,suspicion on the tainted wind1 and1 dazed ,his eyes with darkness from the glare just left ,of torchlight in the court1 uncertain saw1 ,to the right hand beside the open port1 ,there on the ground1 as ambushed at his feet1 ,a motion1 or a shadow1 or a shape1 ,which to his careful mind portended ill4 ,halt6 rang abrupt the startling stern command2 ,seize him6 the leader of the vanguard cried1 ,and pointed to the skulking figure near4 ,darted three soldiers from the rank of foot1 ,with instant light celerity--a flash ,of movement from the serried column sent ,inerrant to its aim1 like lever-arm ,of long bright steel by some machine flung forth ,to do prehensile office and fetch home-- ,darted upon the man in hiding there1 ,and brought him prisoner to the chiliarch4 ,knowest thou this man8 the chiliarch asked of ,paul4 ,shimei his name1 an elder of the ,jews1 ,responded ,paul2 turning1 the chiliarch then ,said3 ,thou--,stephen1 ,i think they call thee--speak4 ,thou toldst me yesterday1 not naming him1 ,of one all-capable of crime1 the head ,and chief of a conspiracy to slay2 ,answer--thou needst not fear--is this the man8 ,stephen flushed shame2 ,the same1 my lord1 he said2 ,he dropped therewith his eyes1 and head declined4 ,thou stayest1 the chiliarch said to ,shimei2 ,on1 and with speed6 he to the soldiers said4 ,to a centurion1 then1 attending him3 ,relieve the sentry set outside the port1 ,and hither bid the man released to me4 ,what wast thou doing at thy sentry-post1 ,that miscreant such as this should sit him there ,unchallenged8 ,sleeping8 ,soothed perhaps to sleep ,with chink of gold sweet-shaken in thine ear8-- ,a perilous frown dark on his imminent brow1 ,the chiliarch thus bespoke the sentinel4 ,but with full steady eye1 the man replied3 ,i crave thy pardon1 if1 through ignorance ,i erred1 but ,i nowise forgot myself1 ,or failed my duty of strict challenging4 ,indeed1 sir1 if the man in presence be ,aught but a loyal1 honest gentleman1 ,then am ,i much deceived1 and punish me2 ,but not for slackness or base traitorhood4 ,as ,i my oath and office understand1 ,i was true soldier and true sentinel4 ',sound heart1 if addle head1' the chiliarch thought1 ,thy oath and office1 my good sentinel-- ,thou needest to understand them better1 said4 ,the sentry1 fain to clear himself1 began3 ,he told me-- ,doubtless some amusing tale1 ,smiling an easy scorn1 the chiliarch said4 ,surging with zeal and conscious honesty1 ,the sentinel again his part essayed3 ,he said1 sir-- ,aye1 ,i warrant thee he did1 ,if but thou hearkenedst1 said the chiliarch2 ,tongue seldom lacks1 let ear be freely lent4 ,sharp question and short answer1 there an end-- ,that is the wisdom for the man on watch4 ,words are a master snare1 beware of words1 ,thine own or other's1 either equal fear2 ,no parley1 is the sentinel's safe rule4 ,whet up thy wits1 my man1 but this time--go6 ,the sentry thus dismissed1 retiring1 shot ,into the chiliarch's ear a ,parthian word3 ,beseech thee1 sir1 prejudge nor him1 nor me2 ,wait till thou hear the gentleman explain4 ,thou hast bewitched him well1 to ,shimei ,turning1 the chiliarch said2 then1 with cold eye ,regarding and repelling him1 exclaimed ,hoar head1 thou lookest every inch a rogue6 ,shimei had marked with a considering mind ,the chiliarch's manner with the sentinel2 ,in dilatory parry1 he replied3 ,not what we look1 but what we are1 we are4 ,but what we are1 conforms at length our looks1 ,surprised1 amused1 in doubt1 but dallying1 matched ,the ,roman his rejoinder4 ,then the ,jew1 ,adventuring on one more avoidance1 said3 ,well dost thou say 'at length'2 for it might chance ,that looks were obstinate1 requiring time4 ,coiner of wisdom into apothegm6 ,an undiscovered ,seneca in sooth1 ,where least expected1 seems ,i meet to-night6 ,but spare to bandy sentences with me4 ,with change to chilling dignity from sneer1 ,the ,roman so rebuffed the cringing ,jew2 ,who1 cringing1 yet was no least whit abashed1 ,but answered3 ,pardon1 sir1 thy servant1 who ,has missed his mark in his simplicity4 ,i thought1 ',if ,i might spare my lord his time6' ,and dutifully thereto spared my words4 ,the farthest was it from my humble aim ,to mint my silly thought in adages4 ,forgive me1 if1 unconsciously set on ,by thy example of sententious speech-- ,true wisdom closed in fitting words and few-- ,i seemed to match my worthless wit with thine4 ,i have a helpless habit of the mind1 ,a trick of mimicry that masters me2 ,when ,i observe in them what ,i admire1 ,i can not but my betters imitate4 ,i fear me ,i have compromised my cause2 ,had ,i been deeper1 ,i had less seemed deep6 ,i lack the art to show the artless man ,that in my own true self1 sir1 thou shouldst see4 ,with my superiors1 ,i am not myself2 ,i take on airs1 or seem to1 copying them4 ,quite other am ,i with my proper like2 ,i feel at home1 and am the man ,i am4 ,ask that plain-spoken1 honest sentinel-- ,he now was my own sort1 ,i never thought ,to strain myself above my natural mark ,with him2 we were hail fellows1 he and ,i1 ,and talked the harmless wise that such know how4 ,with thee--oh1 sir1 myself ,i quite forsook1 ,and slipped into a different ,shimei4 ,pity my weakness1 ,i am sick of it2 ,to ape the great is folly for the small-- ,but small may hope forgiveness from the great6 ,the chiliarch listened1 unconvinced2 yet charmed1 ,like the bird gazing by the serpent charmed4 ,pretend that ,i am of thy kind1 said he1 ,and show me how thou with the sentry talkedst4 ,now ,lysias nursed a proudly ,roman mind ,disdainful of all nations save his own-- ,disdainfully a ,roman but the more1 ,that he by purchase1 not by birth1 was such2 ,the nation that he ruled he most disdained4 ,child of the high-bred fashion of his time1 ,by choice and culture he a skeptic was4 ,skeptic1 he yet was superstitious too1 ,open and weak to supernatural fears2 ,he easily believed in magic powers1 ,charms1 sorceries1 witchcrafts1 incantations1 spells1 ,and all the weird pretensions of the ,east4 ,his habit of disdain and skepticism ,made him a cynic in his views of men2 ,whereby he oft1 wise-seeming1 was unwise4 ,he took upon himself laconic airs ,in speech1 in action airs abrupt1 as who ,bold was1 and strong1 and from reflection deep-- ,the manner1 rather than the matter1 his4 ,to any chance observer of his ways ,in use of office and position1 these ,could but have seemed comportable and fair4 ,accesses too of gentleness he had1 ,wherein a strain of kindly in the man ,opened and gushed in flow affectionate1 ,or well-becoming courtesy and grace4 ,this ,roman chiliarch1 ,claudius ,lysias1 now ,found himself much at leisure and at ease1 ,rid of that worrying case of prisoner strange2 ,unconscious satisfaction with himself ,warmed at his heart1 a pleasurable glow-- ,he had so neatly got it off his hands6 ,he was quite ready1 mind acquitted thus1 ,heart buoyant1 to disport himself4 ,he saw ,that in the man before him he had met ,no dull mere mediocrity1 but one ,who1 besides being ruler of the ,jews1 ,as ,paul pronounced him1 had a quality1 ,an individual difference1 all his own4 ,claudius might test this man1 get him to talk-- ,an interesting study1 learn his make4 ,besides the pleasure to his appetite ,for piquant knowledge of his fellow-man1 ,it might in some way1 indirect the better1 ,give him a point or two of policy ,to guide the conduct of his rulership ,among a people difficult to rule4 ,in such mood1 idle1 curious1 partly wise1 ,this half-wise man1 unwise through cynicism1 ,gave himself leave to say to ,shimei3 ,pretend that ,i am of thy kind1 like him1 ,let me hear how thou with the sentry talked4 ,hardly could ,shimei1 through the mask he wore ,of feigned simplicity1 help leering out1 ,confessed the mocker that he ever was1 ,in that sardonic grin1 as he replied3 ,pretense1 of whatso sort1 be far from me-- ,save when my betters wish it of me2 then1 ,i think it right to put my conscience by2 ,or rather place it at their service--that1 ,the dearest thing the poor good man can claim6 ,i reason in this way1 ',why should ,i presume ,to scruple1 where those wiser far than ,i ,are clear8' ,that sure would be the worst pretense-- ,pretending to be holier than the saints4 ,my will1 thou seest1 is tractable enough2 ,but how1 with thee1 to feel sufficient ease ,to do what thou desirest1 go right on ,and talk and chatter as we simple did6 ,first1 then1 perhaps ,i said3 ',this is dull work'-- ,and no offense to thee1 sir1 that ,i said it-- ',dull work1' said ,i1 'to stand1 or pace1 and watch1 ,long hours alone1 and nothing like to happen ,that makes it needful thou shouldst thus keep watch6' ',aye1' grunted he2 ,i thought him stupid like1 ,but ,i had something ,i could tell him then ,that might rub up his wits and brighten them4 ',there is a plot1' said ,i4 ',aye1 plots enough1' ,said he4 ',and something thou shouldst know1' ,i said4 ',i doubt1' said he2 and added3 ',soldiers should ,know nothing but their duty1 how to watch1 ,march1 dig1 fight1 slay1 be slain1 and no word speak4 ,thou hadst better go1' said he1 like that1 more frank ,than courteous1 thou mightst think--he meant no harm1 ,but only like a loyal soldier spoke4 ,i did not go1 but said3 ',the plot ,i mean ,is of escape from prison4' ,but he replied3 ',nobody can escape these times from prison2 ,the emperor has a hundred million eyes1 ,that never wink1 because they have no lids1 ,and never sleep1 because they never tire1 ,and these run everywhere and all things see2 ,the emperor's arms are many1 long and strong1 ,east1 west1 north1 south1 they range throughout the world4 ,oh1 he can reach thee wheresoever hiding1 ,and pluck thee thence and fetch thee safely home2 ,the world is all his prison1 the emperor's4' ',thou thinkest that8' said ,i4 ',no doubt1' said he4 ',but captives still1' said ,i1 'might try to escape8' ',oh1 aye1' said he1 'that is quite natural4' ',and should they try1' ,i said1 'with thee on watch1 ,and should they somehow skill to get by thee1 ,then--and although they be thereafter caught-- ,how fares it then with thee8' said ,i to him-- ',yea1 how with thee that lettest them go by8' ',then there would be1' he said1 'account to give1 ,and ,i should wish ,i had not been on watch4' ',nay1 better wish1 man1 thou hadst better watched1' ,said ,i1 'and thyself caught the fugitive4' ',aye1 that were something better yet1' said he4 ',why1 yea1' said ,i1 'that1 laid to thy account1 ,might win thee prompt promotion out of this4' ',i never dream1' said he1 'of anything ,to lift me from the common soldier's lot4' ',dreaming is idle1 yea1' said ,i to him1 ',but waking thought and action need not be4 ,for instance1 now1' ,i then went on and said-- ,the subtle ,hebrew1 drawing out his tale1 ,mock-artless long1 of gossip with the watch1 ,had never intermitted an intent1 ,considerate1 sly1 solicitous regard ,fixed on the chiliarch's face1 therein to read ,the reflex of the phases of his thought2 ,and now he marked with pleasure how their mere ,indifferent or incredulous cold scorn ,was fading from the haughty ,roman's eyes1 ,merged in a dawn of curious interest4 ,disguisedly1 but confidently1 glad-- ,his course seen smooth before him to his goal-- ,shimei thence eased that tension of the will ,to simulate simplicity of speech1 ,as1 more directly1 his ambages spared1 ,he almost blithely1 in his natural vein ,of fondness for the false and the malign1 ,slid on1 in fabrication of report1 ,or in report of fabrication1 thus3 ,inside those castle walls there is a man1 ,a ,jew1 one ,paul1 ,i know him very well1 ,prisoner for crime that richly merits death4 ,the outraged people yesterday were fain ,to wait no longer1 but at once inflict1 ,themselves1 with righteous hands1 the penalty4 ,the gentle chiliarch rescued him from them1 ,not knowing1 as of course how could he know8 ,what a base wretch he plucked from doom condign4 ,so here ,paul is in ,roman custody1 ,safe for the moment1 but full well aware1 ,as he deserves to die1 that die he will1 ,whenever once he shall be justly judged4 ,he therefore schemes it to attempt escape1 ,this very night1 from his imprisonment4 ,he has his tool1 tool and accomplice both1 ,in that young fellow thou hast seen pass by1 ,entering and issuing through the castle-gate4 ',aye1 ,i have seen him plying back and forth1' ,the sentry said1 'a likely ,hebrew lad2 ,i challenged him1 but he had documents4 ,wicked1 ungrateful6--that good chiliarch ,had shown such grace to him for his fair looks4' ',well1 ,i will stay1' said ,i1 'and watch with thee1 ,and help thee foil their game1 and thy chance mend4 ,but let us have two stout young fellows ready1 ,i can provide them1 hidden nigh at hand-- ,no call for us to spend our breath in running6-- ,to give the prisoner chase1 should need arise4 ,arise it will not1 if my guess is right1 ,and ,i know ,paul so well1 ,i scarce can miss4 ,paul stakes his hope on craft1 and not on speed2 ,still1 it is good to be at all points armed1 ,and should craft fail1 there will be test of speed1 ,no doubt of that1 since ,paul would run for life1 ,and life is prize to make the tortoise fleet4 ,paul is no stiff decrepit--far from such2 ,old as his look is1 he is light of heel4 ,running1 however1 only last resort1 ,the desperate refuge of necessity2 ,paul's main reliance is on something else1 ,to wit1 a pretty ruse and stratagem4 ,a wary fellow ,paul1 and deep in wiles6 ,shimei was entered on a mingled vein ,of true and false reflection of his thought1 ,wherein himself could scarce the line have drawn ,to part the fabrication from the fact4 ,partly1 he thought indeed that ,paul was such ,as he was now describing him to be1 ,in image and projection of himself2 ,partly1 he painted an ideal mere1 ,conscious creation of malicious mind4 ,he did uneasily believe1 or fear1 ,that ,paul would somehow cheat the malice yet ,of those who hated him2 perhaps contrive ,escape by night from prison4 ,his restless mind1 ,hotbed of machination1 equally ,was hotbed of suspicion and surmise4 ,his mere suspicion and surmise became1 ,to his imagination1 certainty2 ,or else he took1 himself1 for certainty1 ,at length1 what he for certainty affirmed1 ,swearing the false till he believed it true4 ,he thus the story of his talk prolonged3 ',now hark thee1 friend1 and hear me prophesy1' ,so to the worthy sentinel ,i said1 ',thou sawest ,paul brought in1 and he was ,paul-- ,tell me1 was not he ,paul1 when he came in8 ,aye1 ,paul he was1 thou sayest4 ,well1 what ,i say-- ,and this now1 mark it1 is my prophecy-- ,paul will come out1 not ,paul1 but some one else2 ,in short1 will hobble forth--,gamaliel6 ,gamaliel1 thou must know1 ,i said to him1 ',is the old man that lad this morn led in2 ,making1 forsooth1 a touching sight to see1 ,so tenderly and gingerly the lad ,guided and stayed the steps of that old man4 ,a pretty acted piece of loyalty ,to venerable age from blooming youth6 ,watch1 thou shalt see it acted over again ,to-night1 with haply some improvement made ,on the rehearsal1 when he leads out ,paul4 ,paul's hair and beard will not need dusting white1 ,being as white as old ,gamaliel's now2 ,but edifying it will be to mark ,the careful studied totter of the step1 ,the tremble of the hand upon his staff1 ,the thin and querulous quaver of the voice1 ,the helpless meek dependence on his guide1 ,and all the various aged make-believe1 ,wherewith that subtle master of deceit1 ,that natural1 practised1 life-long actor1 ,paul1 ,will put the guise of old ,gamaliel on4 ',he-he6' ,i chuckled to the sentinel1 ',to me the spectacle will be as good ,and laughable1 as ,i should guess a play1 ,a roaring one1 of ,plautus were to thee6' ,shimei was venturing to let lapse his part ,of mere reporter to a talk supposed ,betwixt himself and the dull sentinel-- ,this to let lapse1 or1 if not quite let lapse1 ,mix and confound with his own proper part1 ,inveterate1 unassumed1 of scoffer free2 ,he saw the chiliarch sink so deep immersed ,in hearing and in weighing what was said1 ,he deemed he might thenceforward trust his speech1 ,with scant disguise of indirection1 aimed ,as frankly for a keen intelligence-- ,the chiliarch's own1 and not the sentinel's-- ,to snare his listener's now less warded wit4 ,paul was clean gone indeed1 gone otherwise ,than through the guile that he had dared impute2 ,but he1 meantime1 would such a chance not miss1 ,a golden chance that might not come again1 ,to prepossess the chiliarch's captive mind ,with pregnant ill surmise concerning ,paul4 ,there yet was unexhausted circumstance ,suggestively at hand1 seed that but sown ,would a fine harvest of suspicion spring4 ,point-blank his aim shifted to ,lysias now1 ,he said3 ,why did ,gamaliel stay so long8 ,why1 indeed1 come at all1 but1 having come1 ,why so long tarry1 wearing out the day8 ,where is ,gamaliel now8 ,what did it mean ,that that officious ,hebrew youngster--he ,who1 at ,paul's wish1 ,gamaliel hither brought1 ,who back and forth has flitted through the gate ,all day1 carrying and fetching as he liked-- ,what did it mean1 ,i ask1 that he bore in ,flagons of wine and loaves of bread8 ,what mean8 ,why1 this1 provision got to serve ,paul's need1 ,when1 issuing in ,gamaliel's vesture1 he ,should shuffle forth1 ,gamaliel1 on the street1 ,to try the fortune of a runaway1 ,a hopeless runaway in ,csar's world4 ,the clement chiliarch never would be hard ,on an old dotard of a hundred years1 ,found aider and abettor in such wile1 ,where left behind in ward to take his chance2 ,or1 possibly1 ,gamaliel might not know1 ,much more1 not share1 the stratagem of ,paul4 ,it would be easy to put him to sleep ,and strip him of his raiment1 unawares1 ,for the exchange1 unbargained-for1 with ,paul4 ,paul has much travelled everywhere abroad ,and freely commerced with all kinds of men4 ,he has the skill of many magic arts1 ,the virtue knows of many a mighty drug2 ,he can compound thee opiate drinks to drown ,thy thought and senses in oblivion4 ,he could compose thee in so deep a sleep1 ,fair like an infant's1 that not all the blare ,of all ,rome's trumpets loud together blown ,could rouse thee ever from that fixd sleep4 ,a dangerous wicked man to wield such power6 ,the chiliarch stood suspended in fast gaze ,on ,shimei1 not perusing him1 but lost ,in various troubled and confounded thought4 ',had he indeed been tricked8 ,was ,paul such knave8 ,had that young ,hebrew1 with his innocent ,bright look of truth and faith and nobleness1 ,had he been hollow1 false1 base1 treacherous1 ,and played upon a ,roman father's heart ,to rid a rascal out of custody8 ,gamaliel--was that reverend-looking man1 ,that image of a stately-fair old age1 ,was he a low complotter of deceit8 ,or1 if not that1 had nameless turpitude ,abused such dignity into a tool1 ,helpless1 unwitting1 of ignoble wile8' ,thought1 question1 doubt1 suspicion1 guess1 surmise1 ,tumbled1 a chaos1 in the chiliarch's mind4 ,shimei paused1 watching1 with delight intense2 ,he felt the chiliarch fast ensnared1 his prey4 ,wary as was his wit1 and ill-inclined ,ever to take a needless risk1 or dip ,his feet in paths wherein1 once entered1 he ,perforce must fare right forward1 no retreat-- ,though such in temper1 such in habit1 yet-- ,either that instant suddenly resolved ,that his true prudence was temerity1 ,or trusting his resourceful craft to pluck ,desperate advantage from the jaws of chance-- ,shimei dared interrupt the ,roman's muse3 ,will not my lord the chiliarch now think well ,to call ,gamaliel into presence here8 ,well frightened1 the old man perhaps might tell ,what passed in his long interview with ,paul1 ,something to help thee judge betwixt us twain1 ,which it were well to credit1 ,paul or me4 ,the chiliarch started from his reverie2 ,go bring that ,hebrew ancient here1 he said4 ,then neither ,jew nor ,roman uttered word1 ,each busy with his own unshard thought1 ,till the centurion from his quest returned1 ,alone1 and serious1 no ,gamaliel brought4 ,i found--but scarcely the centurion1 ,faltering1 had so essayed to make report1 ,when the wroth chiliarch snatched the word from him3 ,was not he there8 ,did he refuse to come8 ,the more loth he1 the more to be required6 ,gray hair will not atone for stubbornness2 ,thou shouldst have brought him1 though by greater force4 ,something lurks here lends color to the tale ,this hoar-head ,jew has filled my ear withal4 ,i will ,gamaliel see and learn from him-- ,but1 sir1 spoke up the loth centurion1 ,nothing from that old ,hebrew wilt thou learn1 ,for-- ,i will hear no 'fors1' the chiliarch said1 ,but1 hark thee1 have the man before me straight6 ,mute1 the centurion1 left no option1 turned1 ,and1 with four soldiers bidden follow him1 ,went to the lodgment where ,gamaliel slept4 ,those five men1 used to death in many forms1 ,yet in the presence of such death were awed4 ,the four in silence took the sleeper up1 ,motionless1 with the couch whereon he lay1 ,and bore him1 as to honored burial1 ,into the court beneath the starlit sky1 ,and set him down before the chiliarch4 ,like one of those gray monuments in stone1 ,oft seen where church or minster of old days1 ,in secret vault or holy chapel dim1 ,gathers and wards its venerated dead-- ,marmoreal image of some man1 supine1 ,deep sunken1 in marmoreal down1 to sleep1 ,safe folded in marmoreal robes from cold1 ,the meek1 pathetic face upturned to heaven1 ,and thither-pointing hands forever laid ,together on the breast1 as thus to pray ,for the shriven spirit thence to judgment fled-- ,so1 stretched upon his couch amid the court1 ,white with his age1 yet purer white with death1 ,an unrebuking1 unrebukable ,reminder of the nothingness of time1 ,unheeding who beheld or what was spoke1 ,silent1 and bringing silence touched with awe1 ,there in marmoreal calm ,gamaliel lay4 ,the simple presence of the living man1 ,in native majesty august with age1 ,would have subdued who saw to reverence2 ,but the ennoblement and mystery ,of death1 now added1 wrought a mightier awe1 ,and almost breathless made the hush wherein ,the chiliarch for the moment from the spell ,of ,shimei's woven words was quite set free1 ,seeing things true by his simplicity4 ,breaking that hush1 while never once his gaze ,unfixing from the features of the dead1 ,thou shouldst have told me this1 said ,lysias ,to the centurion1 gently chiding him4 ,but the centurion understood aright ,that his superior's words were less as blame ,than as atonement meant for fault his own ,in that his late too peremptory air-- ,this the subaltern knew1 and answered not4 ,shimei1 alone not capable of awe1 ,coolly had used the interval of pause1 ,to take the altered situation in1 ,and to his own advantage fit his part4 ,two points of promise to his profit he ,saw1 and at once to seize them shaped his course3 ,first1 to release himself from duress there1 ,and1 further1 still to sow the chiliarch's mind ,with seed of foul suspicion against ,paul4 ,gamaliel mute1 said he to ,lysias1 ,might1 peradventure1 if but understood1 ,even better witness to thy purpose prove ,than should he waken from his swoon to speak4 ,the sleight of tone with which was uttered swoon-- ,no emphasis1 insinuation all1 ,subtle suggestion1 naught to be gainsaid1 ,since naught was really said1 however much ,without the saying got itself conveyed-- ,this well subserved the wish of ,shimei4 ,for1 like a sovereign solvent1 that1 with soft ,assiduous chemistry insensible1 ,some solid to a fluid form breaks down1 ,there stole from ,shimei's speech an influence in1 ,which1 by degrees not slow1 dissolved the charm ,shed from the solemn spectacle of death ,upon the chiliarch's mind2 his childlike mood ,vanished1 his simple wise credulity6 ,lysias reverted to his cynicism1 ,and1 unawares lured on by ,shimei1 ,followed false lights to a conclusion vain4 ,once more he overweened to be astute1 ,and1 with astuteness recommencing1 fell ,from the brief wisdom reverence brief had brought4 ,his faith in human virtue undermined1 ,he doubted and believed exactly wrong2 ,there where he ought to have believed1 he doubted1 ,and where he should have doubted1 there believed-- ,the captor fallen into the captive's snare4 ,lysias resumed to do what ,shimei wished2 ,the tissue of sophistication set ,already well aweaving in the loom ,of fancy and false reason and unfaith1 ,which had before been humming in his brain-- ,this to piece out1 and make a finished web4 ',swoon1' sayest thou8 ,to ,shimei1 ,lysias thus2 ,that is not death1 thou thinkest1 but a swoon8 ,it looks indeed like death1 the crafty ,jew ,responded2 yea1 it looks like death indeed4 ,it was not meant1 but death it sure must be4 ,what wilt thou say8 said ,lysias4 ',was not meant6'-- ,thy words conceal thy meaning2 speak it out4 ,why1 sir1 ,i have no meaning to conceal1 ,the ,jew replied1 no meaning to conceal4 ,i only thought1 ,i could but only think-- ,why1 see1 ,paul was ,gamaliel's pupil once1 ,and loved his master1 so as such can love2 ,at least ,i thought so4 ,paul1 for sure ,i know1 ,gamaliel like a doting father loved4 ,thou dost not thus explain1 ',it was not meant'2 ,out with thy thought1 sir ,jew1 the chiliarch said4 ,what was not meant8 ,by whom not meant8 ,forsooth1 ,not by ,gamaliel meant that he should die8 ,except the suicide1 none means to die2 ,and death like this is not the suicide's4 ,oh1 nay1 sir1 ,shimei said1 no suicide ,was our ,gamaliel2 far the heinous thought6 ,a good old man1 whom all the people loved1 ,paul even1 yea1 ,paul--,i thought--till now--but now-- ,but ,i will not believe so base of him1 ,even him2 he did not mean it1 did not mean ,worse than to make ,gamaliel deeply sleep4 ,paul's drug belike was stronger than he thought1 ,or weaker waxed ,gamaliel with his age4 ,paul would himself repent it1 now1 too late-- ,particularly since of no avail1 ,thy wise forestalling plan defeating his1 ,and fruit none from it ripening to his hand6 ,this is too foully base6 said ,lysias1 ,and ,shimei's heart misgave him with a fear4 ',too foully base insinuation mine1 ,does ,lysias mean8' he closely asked himself2 ,but calmly1 with deep candor1 said aloud3 ,yea1 even for ,paul1 beyond belief too base6 ,paul never meant it1 ,i shall still insist4 ,he meant at most such sleep as should prevail ,over ,gamaliel's scruple to take part ,willingly in his surreptitious flight4 ,and such a master of his arts is ,paul1 ,i shrewdly doubt if here his mark he missed4 ,were ,paul but now at hand to try his skill1 ,i should not wonder yet to see this swoon ,yield to some potent drug of counter force1 ,and good ,gamaliel wake to life again4 ,once1 as they say--in ,troas1 ,i believe-- ,where he all night was lengthening out harangue1 ,after his manner1 in an upper room1 ,a youngster1 tired to death of hearing him1 ,and sensible enough to go to sleep1 ,not sensible enough to seat him safe1 ,fell headlong out of window1 whence he sat1 ,a good three stories' fall--which finished him4 ,stay1 not so fast--thou reckonest without ,paul6 ,yea1 ,paul performed some sort of magic rite ,over the body of the luckless lad1 ,which1 presto1 brought him round as brisk as ever6 ,a mighty master in his kind1 that ,paul6 ,perish thy ,paul with his accursd craft6 ,burst out the chiliarch in indignant heat4 ,would ,i but had him back here safe in thrall6-- ,i should have let them rend him limb from limb6 ,a sudden hope beyond the bounds of hope ,flourished up rank1 gourd-like1 in ,shimei's breast4 ,were it but possible to have ,paul back1 ,to take that walk yet to the judgment-hall6 ,the forty faithful should not fail their task6 ,might ,i propose if it be yet too late8 ,with timid daring1 ,shimei inquired4 ,a fleet-foot horse should overtake the troop1 ,if so thou choose1 and turn them hither back4 ,and thou couldst cause that ,paul exert his power ,to lift this corpse into a living man-- ,which were a famous spectacle to see6 ,besides that then thou mightst assure thyself1 ,through counsel of our ,sanhedrim1 what crimes ,worthy of death are proved upon this ,paul4 ,thou art a superserviceable ,jew1 ,the chiliarch frowned and said4 ,a choleric man1 ,he choleric now1 through self-expression1 grew4 ,exasperate thus1 he added3 ',ruler' thou ,of thine accursd nation--as ,i hear-- ,me too thou fain wouldst rule1 with thy advice ,officiously advanced unsought4 ,know1 then1 ,that ,i confound thee with thy race1 and curse ,ye all together1 pestilent brood--not less ,thee than thy fellows1 whom thou rulest1 forsooth1 ,worthy to rule those worthily so ruled6 ,like ruler to like people1 vipers all6 ,if ,i believe thee of thy brother ,paul1 ,it is no wise that ,i suppose thee true ,rather than him2 but only that ,i reckon ,one rascal feels another by mere kin1 ,and can1 and1 if so be he hates him1 will1 ,into his own soul look and paint him that-- ,making a likeness apt to two at once6 ,nay1 nay1 thou wretched1 reptile ,jew1 all thanks6 ,i would not have ,paul back upon my hands4 ,i am well rid of him1 and now hence thou6 ,go tell thy fellow-elders of the ,jews ,that here ,gamaliel lies1 dead or aswoon1 ,and bid them haste to bear him hence away4 ,go1 not one further word from thy foul mouth1 ,lest whole thou never go6 ,red with his wrath1 ,abruptly on his heel turned the wroth man ,and disappeared within4 ,the ,jew so spurned-- ,though disappointed1 imperturbable-- ,with wry grimace hugging himself1 made speed ,to use the freedom thus in overplus ,thrust on him1 and incontinently went4 ,scarce was he well without the castle gate1 ,when a brusque message from the chiliarch ,summoned him back4 ,he came1 with supple knee ,cringing his thanks and deprecations dumb4 ,so act thy abject language1 if thou will1 ,but no word speak1 edging thine ear to hear1 ,the chiliarch1 from his heat of passion passed ,to a grim mood of resolution1 said2 ,i will that--no delay--thou hither bring ,large satisfaction from thy countrymen-- ,just measure of their estimate of thee6-- ,that thou wilt duly bide within command ,the suddenest from this castle1 and appear1 ,whenever ,i may call for thee1 to go ,whithersoever ,i shall bid thee hence1 ,whether to ,csarea or to ,rome1 ,whether now presently or hereafter long1 ,accuser meet and witness against ,paul4 ,count it that thou thus much at least hast gained1 ,through thy this night's adventure1 chance1 to wit1 ,assurd chance1 thy famished grudge to glut ,upon thy brother rogue and countryman-- ,be he1 that is1 the wretch thou paintest him1 ,and1 mark it well1 be thou his overmatch ,in lying eloquence to make appear ,likeliest whatever best thy turn shall serve4 ,perhaps twin rascals1 of each other worthy1 ,will1 both at once1 and each the other1 prove ,just to be what they are1 and earn their doom6 ,send with this worthy1 thus the chiliarch1 ,to his centurion turning1 said1 some man ,who knows1 if nothing more1 thus much at least1 ,how to be adder-deaf and death-like dumb-- ,to dog him hence about and hither back6 ,i wish thee pleasure of thy evening walk6 ,to ,shimei1 in mock courtesy1 he said4 ,with pleasantry as bitter as his own ,the mocker found himself a second time1 ,and now to discomposure worse1 dismissed4 ,of his own will he gladly would have gone ,from east to west as wide as was the world1 ,to weave the meshes of his witness false ,about ,paul's feet1 or still to ambush him ,with instant bloody death at unawares2 ,but thus to go1 a lasso round his neck ,held in the hand of ,rome--it irked him sore4 ,his heart misgave him heavily2 he felt3 ',and here perhaps is destiny for me1 ,perhaps1 who knows8 at last1 at last1 for me6 ,on mine own head do ,i ,paul's house pull down8' ,strange1 but1 born with the boding sense thus born ,of unguessed danger for himself1 there crept ,into that case-hard heart1 long exercised ,to plot of mischief for his fellow-man1 ,a softness1 that was nigh become remorse1 ,a kind of pity from self-pity sprung1 ,toward whoso was endangered1 yea1 even ,paul6 ,it was the slow beginning of an end-- ,slow1 liable to be quenched like smoking flax1 ,yet not so quenched to be--with ,shimei4 ,meanwhile1 from this to that there stretched much road1 ,and ,shimei still had demon's work to do4 ,,book ,,iv4 ,,by ,,night ,,for ,c,,sarea4 ,the narrative returns to ,paul riding with young ,stephen1 under escort of ,roman soldiers1 toward ,csarea4 ,the uncle and nephew 7at sufficient remove from the cavalry before them and the infantry behind them7 after an interval of silence1 engage in conversation on a subject suggested by young ,stephen's quoting against ,shimei one of the imprecatory psalms4 ,this conversation is prolonged till ,antipatris is reached1 from which point young ,stephen comes back to ,jerusalem with the returning foot-soldiers1 while ,paul goes on with the horse to ,csarea4 ,,by ,,night ,,for ,c,,sarea4 ,clanging their armor and their arms alight ,in doubtful glimmer from the torches blown1 ,forward into the silence and the dark1 ,through the strait street1 out from the city gate1 ,along the ringing highway stretched in stone ,to ,csarea from ,jerusalem1 ,rode vanguard in that order of array ,the turm of horse--in count three score and ten1 ,but many fold to seeming multiplied ,under the shadowy light that showed them half1 ,half hid them1 and amid the numerous noise ,and movement of their massive martial tread4 ,the centuries of foot the rear composed1 ,while midst1 between the horse and infantry1 ,and double-guarded so from every fear-- ,before1 behind1 commodious interval-- ,those ,hebrew kinsmen1 ,paul and ,stephen1 rode4 ,a league now measured under the still heaven-- ,quiet1 they twain1 as the beholding stars-- ,and ,stephen heard the silence at his side ,softly become the sound of a low voice4 ,as when the ground parts and a buried seed-- ,quickened already in that genial womb1 ,but viewless--steals from darkness into light1 ,so1 with such unperceived transition1 now1 ,melodious meditation in ,paul's heart ,grew out of secret silence into song4 ,stephen1 who1 from his very cradle taught1 ,the holy lore of ,scripture had by heart1 ,knew the subdued preamble that he heard ,for echo from the music of a psalm4 ',mine uncle of ,gamaliel muses6' he ,felt from the moment that thus ,paul began3 ,yea1 so ,he giveth ,his belovd sleep6 ,blessd be ,god1 who such a gift gave him6 ,blessd be ,god1 who yet such gift from me ,withholds1 gift longed for1 but awaited still ,with patience--till ,his pleasure to bestow6 ,blessd be ,god6 ,he doeth all things well6 ,it may be ,i shall wake until ,he come6 ,but if ,i sleep1 ,i still shall sleep in ,him1 ,for so ,he giveth ,his belovd sleep6 ,sweet gift1 and sure the way of giving sweet1 ,since it will be in ,him1 in ,him1 in ,him-- ,however long hence1 and however harsh1 ,the lullaby may be that brings the sleep1 ,at last1 at last1 the sleep will be in ,him6 ,to wake to ,jesus1 or in ,him to sleep1 ,whichever lot for me ,he choose1 ,i choose4 ,his choice ,i do not know1 but ,he knows mine2 ,my will1 he knows1 is ,his1 for ,him in me ,to choose with1 or ,his will is mine1 for me ,in ,him to choose with1 now and evermore4 ,amen6 ,paul murmured1 with such voice as if ,the prayer he uttered turned to sacrament4 ,stephen a little lingered1 and then said3 ,thou and thy voice1 ,o honored kinsman mine1 ,commend to me whatever thou mayst say ,or sing2 that inner-sounding melody1 ,most sweet1 which never other makes save thee1 ,but oft thou makest as to thyself alone ,when thou alone art1 or1 as now1 with whom ,thou lovest1 and so trustest1 utterly1 ,it seems--this ,i have heard my mother say1 ,who loves it1 as ,i love it1 taught by her-- ,it seems to pass the hearing sense unheard2 ,the deeper1 if ,i hear it not1 ,i feel2 ,my heart feeds on it with her inner ear4 ,yet1 and however so commended1 yet ,thy choice awakens no desire in me4 ,sleep1 to thy nephew1 uncle1 seems not sweet1 ,or less sweet seems than waking is to him4 ,to lie1 like reverend dear ,gamaliel there1 ,still1 stirless still2 cold1 marble cold2 deaf1 dumb2 ,calm1 yea1 too calm1 for ever1 ever calm2 ,no pain1 no fret1 but joy1 but pleasure none2 ,nor action1 nor endeavor1 nor attempt1 ,nor strife1 nor aspiration1 nor desire2 ,no glorious exultation in emprise1 ,or rally of reaction from defeat2 ,fear none indeed1 but never1 never hope2 ,no change1 no chance of any change1 the same1 ,the same1 continuance without end prolonged2 ,of life--nothing1 but only dull1 dull death ,and apathy--,o uncle1 such a state1 ,and though thou call it sleep in ,jesus1 yet-- ,shall ,i confess it1 uncle1 to my shame8-- ,it has no charm for me1 ,i wish to live2 ,i love life1 motion1 and the sense of power4 ,hebrew ,i am1 in spirit as in blood1 ,yet ,greek withal enough1 if ,greek it be1 ,to dread the drear1 dark1 sunless underworld1 ,hades or ,sheol1 and to choose instead ,this cheerful upper air and joyousness1 ,the brightness of this sun-enlightened earth4 ,and ,i should like to see what ,i with life ,can do2 something1 ,i trust1 besides to live1 ,some worthy1 noble1 arduous end to serve1 ,to wrestle with the world and overthrow6 ,paul thought within himself3 ',along this road1 ,this very road1 some score of years ago1 ,saul1 in the early dawn of that spring day1 ,rode for ,damascus from ,jerusalem1 ,nursing such thoughts--fair thoughts they seemed to him6 ,and ,i was then nigh double my ,stephen's age-- ,ah1 and not half his bright young innocence6' ,it is thy youth1 to ,stephen ,paul replied1 ,thy youth and health1 the fountain fresh of life ,unwasted1 springing up for flow in thee2 ,life is the secret of the love of life4 ,my song of sleep ,i did not sing for thee1 ,but for a weary older man than thou1 ,who has already lived1 already seen ,what he could do with life6 ,weary am ,i-- ,with living weary1 though of living not-- ,and1 ,god so willing1 ,i should gladly rest4 ,the sweetness of the pensiveness of this1 ,from such an one as ,paul the aged1 smote ,on ,stephen with a stroke as of reproof-- ,unmeant1 to him the less resistible-- ,and touched to recollection and remorse4 ,he said3 ,o uncle1 be my fault forgiven1 ,that ,i so lightly thought but of myself6 ,this ride to thee is added weariness1 ,which to me were exhilaration pure1 ,could ,i forget again1 as ,i cannot1 ,the need my uncle has of rest instead4 ,i slept1 while thou wert waking1 through that long ,farewell talk with thy friend1 and ,i am fresh ,from slumber1 as thou art with waking worn-- ,besides that ,i am young and thou art old4 ,nay1 thou wert right1 my lad1 said ,paul to him2 ',rejoice thou1' so that ancient preacher cried1 ,and so cries ,god ,himself within the blood1 ',rejoice thou1 ,o young man1 in thy fair youth1 ,and let thy heart in thy young days cheer thee4' ,i were myself the egotist thou blamest1 ,were ,i to hang my heavy age on thee ,and with it weigh thy blithesome spirits down2 ,besides that ,i should suffer loss deserved1 ,who1 in the midmost of my spirit1 spring ,with answering pulse to pulse of youth from thee4 ,go on1 my ,stephen1 for ,paul's sake be glad1 ,thou canst not be more glad than gladdens me4 ,now glad we both are surely in one thing1 ,that thou hast saved thine uncle from that death4 ,let us together sing a gladsome psalm4 ,then softly they in unison began1 ,softly1 with yet their accent jubilant3 ',had it not been ,jehovah on our side1 ,let ,israel now'--let us as ,israel--'say1 ,had it not been ,jehovah on our side1 ,when men1 together sworn1 against us rose1 ,then had they truly swallowed us alive1 ,when sore their wrath against us kindled was2 ,the waters then had overwhelmed us quite1 ,over our soul the rushing stream had gone1 ,over our soul the proud exulting waters4 ,forever blessd be ,jehovah ,lord1 ,who did not give us to their teeth a prey6 ,escaped our soul is1 like unto a bird ,that is escaped from out the fowler's snare2 ,the snare is broken1 and escaped are we4 ,our help is in the ,lord ,jehovah's name1 ,in ,his name is1 who fashioned heaven and earth4' ,they ceased1 but presently ,paul's voice alone3 ,how those great words1 which ,god the ,holy ,ghost ,spake by the mouth of men of old1 elect ,to be ,his earthly oracles--how they ,fill yet the mouth of him that utters them1 ,and fill the ear of him that hears them uttered1 ,and the heart fill of him that makes them his-- ,fill1 and1 enlarging ever1 ever fill6 ,they satisfy the soul1 not as with food ,that sates the hunger1 to cry out1 ',enough6' ,but as with hunger's self1 and appetite ,that never ceases crying1 ',more6 ,and more6' ,forever greater growing1 and sweeter far ,than could be any stay to such desire6 ,according as the ,lord ,himself once spake ,pronouncing blessd those whose hunger is ,for righteousness1 and promising to them ,fulness4 ,fulness without satiety ,their blessd state6 ,state blessd1 sure--to be ,if only with that heavenly hunger filled6 ,to ,stephen half1 but half in ecstasy ,of pure abandonment to worshiping ,high passion and communion rapt above1 ,paul so his heart disburdened of its praise4 ,yea1 ,stephen said1 it is a noble psalm1 ,triumphal in its gladness at escape ,like thine from evil and from evil men4 ,with all my heart ,i sang it thankfully-- ,at least1 if joyfully be thankfully2 ,yet have ,i thoughts not uttered through that psalm4 ,the elder and the wiser well divined1 ,from something in the manner of the speech ,of ,stephen1 as too from the words themselves ,he spoke1 what was the spirit of those thoughts ,within him1 which the chanted psalm left dumb4 ,paul safer judged it for his nephew's health ,of heart and conscience1 that the heat and stir ,of natural thought untoward in him find ,issue in utterance1 than sealed shut to be4 ,and what1 then1 nephew1 were those thoughts of thine8 ,in gentle serious question he inquired4 ,how is it1 uncle1 swerving1 asked the youth-- ,for a fine tact to feel what other felt1 ,unspoken1 unbetokened1 though it were1 ,was ,stephen's1 and this power of sympathy ,now gave him sobering sense of check from ,paul-- ,how is it1 so thou deemest me meet to know1 ,i never hear thee speak of ,shimei8 ,ah1 ,stephen1 ,paul replied1 we lack not themes ,to speak of1 promising more food to thee ,for sweet and gracious thought and feeling4 ,yet ,i think of ,shimei1 and to ,god ,i speak ,of him in prayer1 often1 not without hope4 ,i never will abandon him to be ,himself1 the self that now is he4 ,too well1 ,too bitterly1 ,i remember what ,i was1 ,i myself1 once1 as rancorous as he6 ,if guileful less1 that was the grace of ,god1 ,who made us differ from each other there4 ,hateful to him ,i needs was1 from the first1 ,but ,i was hateful more than needed be2 ,i helped him hate me by my scornful pride4 ,would from his hate ,i could that strand untwine6 ,hating ,paul less1 he less might ,jesus hate2 ,only to pity ,shimei am ,i clear4 ,thy patience and thy meekness make me fierce ,with anger1 with ungovernable wrath ,most righteous1 ,stephen cried1 against those men ,who1 hating1 hunt mine uncle to the death6 ,i hate them1 and ,i wish them--what themselves ,wish thee2 dogs of the devil that they are6 ,i know a psalm that ,i should like to sing-- ,but ,i should need to roughen hoarse my voice1 ,and a tune frame well jangled out of tune1 ,to sing it as ,i would1 and as were meet4 ,thy pardon1 but my rage surpasses bound2 ,to think of what thou art and what they are6 ,some spirit in me1 right or wrong1 too hot ,for any counsel1 even thine own1 to cool1 ,forces unto my lips those wholesome words ,of hearty human hatred1 ,god-inspired1 ,most needful vent and ease to wish like mine2 ,i lift to ,god the prayer ,himself inbreathed3 ',hold not thy peace1 thou ,lord ,god of my praise6 ,who hath rewarded evil still for good1 ,and hatred still for only love returned1 ,set thou a wicked one lord over him1 ,and ,satan ever keep at his right hand4 ,when he is judged1 then let him guilty prove1 ,and let his very prayer turn into sin4 ,few let his days be1 and his office let ,another take4 ,his children fatherless1 ,his wife a widow1 be4 ,nay1 vagabonds ,his children1 let them beg from door to door4 ,all that he hath1 let the extortioner ,catch1 and let strangers make his labor spoil4 ,let his posterity be utterly ,cut off1 and in the time to come their name ,be blotted out4 ,let the iniquity ,of his forefathers still remembered be ,in the ,lord's presence1 and his mother's sin ,not blotted out3 because he persecuted ,the poor and needy man1 and those that were ,already broken-hearted sought to slay4 ,cursing he loved1 and cursing came to him2 ,in blessing he delighted not1 and far ,from him was blessing4 ,he with cursing clothed ,himself as with his garment1 and it sank ,soaking into his inward parts like water ,and penetrating to his bones like oil4 ,amen6 ,let cursing be forevermore ,as if the raiment wherewith he himself ,covers1 and for the girdle of his loins ,about them belted fast forevermore6' ,stephen felt blindly that the eager ire ,with which he entered1 flaming1 on that strain ,of awful imprecation from the psalm1 ,faltered within his heart as he went on-- ,insensibly but insupportably ,dispirited toward sinking by the lack ,of buoying and sustaining sympathy ,supplied it from without2 as if the lark1 ,upspringing1 on exultant pinion borne1 ,should1 midway in his soaring for the sun1 ,meet a great gulf of space wherein the air ,was spun out thinner than could bear his weight4 ,he ended1 halting2 and there followed pause1 ,which ponderable seemed to ,stephen1 so ,did his heart feel the pressure of that pause4 ,at length ,paul said1 with sweetest irony1 ,that almost earnest seemed1 it was so sweet3 ,yea1 nephew1 hast thou1 then1 already grown ,perfect in love1 that thou darest hate like that8 ,it was not asked for answer1 ,stephen knew1 ,and answer had he none he could have given1 ,no answer1 save of silence1 much-ashamed4 ,paul let the searching of himself1 begun ,and busy in the spirit of the youth1 ,go on in silence for a while2 and then ,in gravest sweet sincerity he spoke3 ,hating is sweet and wholesome1 for the heart ,that can hate purely1 out of utter love4 ,but who for these things is sufficient--save ,god only8 ,god is love1 and ,he can hate4 ,but for me1 ,stephen1 mine own proper self1 ,i dare not hate until ,i better love4 ,when1 as ,i hope1 hereafter ,i shall be ,perfect in love1 then ,i may safely hate2 ,till then1 ,i task myself to love alone4 ,there was such reverence in ,paul's gravity1 ,reverence implied toward him as toward a peer1 ,not peer in age1 but peer in human worth-- ,toward him1 so young1 so heady1 and so fond-- ,that ,stephen1 in the sting of the rebuke ,itself1 shaming him1 though so gracious1 felt ,a tonic touch that made him more a man4 ,uplifted1 while abashed1 he dared to say3 ,perhaps ,i trespassed in my vehemence2 ,but1 uncle1 did not ,god inspire the psalm8 ,doubtless1 my ,stephen1 ,paul replied2 but not1 ,not therefore1 thee inspire to use the psalm4 ,sound thine own heart now1 nephew1 and tell me1 ,which was it in thy heart that prayed the prayer-- ,true vehemence in sympathy with ,god1 ,or vehemence against thy brother man8 ,a sentiment of sympathy with me ,thou canst not say1 for ,i have no such wish ,as that thou breathedst1 touching any man4 ,though not in sympathy with thee1 at least ,for thy sake1 ,stephen said1 mine anger burned4 ,for my sake1 yea1 but not acceptably ,even so1 said ,paul2 since neither did it serve ,my cause1 nor please me1 if ,i speak the truth4 ,i know thy love for me and hold it dear2 ,all the world's gold were no exchange for it4 ,so1 doubt not1 ,stephen1 that to what degree ,love for thine uncle prompted that thy prayer1 ,thine uncle thanks thee for it from his heart4 ,but let us1 thou and ,i together both1 ,to our own selves severely faithful be4 ,shall we not say that that love faulty is1 ,which less desires to please the one beloved1 ,than to indulge itself1 have its own way8 ,and knowest thou not it would have pleased me better-- ,since1 for the present1 question is of me-- ,to see my nephew altogether such ,as ,i myself am1 lover of all men1 ,hater of none1 not even mine enemy8 ,thou didst not love me well enough for that6 ,thy love though precious and though well-refined ,had yet alloy in it of selfishness-- ,of specious1 almost lovely1 selfishness1 ,i grant thee2 yea1 according to the world1 ,that loves its own illusions1 lovely quite-- ,of such a selfishness alloy enough ,to take its counsel of itself1 not me1 ,blindly abandoned to its own excess4 ,the art of love thou makest difficult6 ,stephen1 with chastened deprecation1 said4 ,not 'difficult1' impossible1 said ,paul1 ,save to whom ,jesus makes it possible4 ,i wish that ,i could bring thee to perceive ,how1 severed from ,him1 thou canst not love at all1 ,right love1 ,i mean1 the one safe sense of love1 ,love with the gift of immortality1 ,since pure and perfectly-proportioned love6 ,left to ourselves1 we love capriciously2 ,ever some form of fond self-love it is1 ,which in disguise of love to other masks4 ,if thou in ,jesus truly hadst loved me ,then hadst thou loved me as ,i would be loved1 ,to absolute effacement of thyself ,through whole replacement of thyself with me4 ,enormous claim seems this of selfishness ,in me8 ,but ,i describe ideally ,the love that ,i myself to ,jesus bear4 ,in ,him ,i lose1 and find again1 my self1 ,and the new self ,i find again1 is--,he6 ,it is but as united thus with ,him-- ,my wish1 my will1 become the same as ,his-- ,that ,i dare make exaction for myself ,of love that seems to blot another out1 ,or merge him in a new and different self4 ,i ask thee--not my will1 but ,christ's1 made thine-- ,to love me with the love that pleases ,him4 ,all this1 said ,stephen1 must be true1 ,i feel-- ,i feel it better than ,i understand4 ,i also1 ,paul said1 in this mystery ,am wiser with my heart than with my mind1 ,i feel it better than ,i understand2 ,although ,i understand it better too ,than ,i can make it plain in any words4 ,whereon in silence for a space they rode1 ,while their thoughts ranged diverse in worlds apart4 ,then ,stephen3 ,that distempering heat in me1 ,o uncle1 is clean gone from out mine heart1 ,slaked by the overshadowing of thy spirit1 ,like the earth cooled with overshadowing night4 ,i am calm enough1 ,i think1 to learn1 if not ,thy difficult high doctrine touching love1 ,something at least about those psalms of hate4 ,hate is the spirit of the psalm ,i said1 ,is it not1 uncle8 ,as thou saidst it1 yea1 ,or ,i mistook the meaning of thy voice1 ,said ,paul2 whatever meant the holy words1 ,the tones1 ,i felt1 meant that and nothing else4 ,could then those words themselves mean something else8 ,asked ,stephen4 ,yea1 said ,paul1 for words are naught ,but empty vessels that the utterer fills ,with his own spirit when he utters them2 ,the spirit is the lord of utterance4 ,what was the spirit with which the ,spirit of ,god ,breathed these into the soul of him elect ,among the sons of men to give them voice8 ,did not ,god hate whom ,he so heavily cursed8 ,stephen inquired2 and ,paul at large replied3 ,god hates not any1 as wicked men count hate-- ,and men not wicked may1 in wicked mood-- ,nor wills that of the souls whom ,he has made ,any should perish2 rather wills that all ,come to the knowledge of the truth and live4 ,but look abroad upon the world of men2 ,what seest thou8 ,many souls resist the will1 ,the blessd will to save1 of ,god4 ,of these1 ,some will hereafter yield--thou knowest not who1 ,but some--and let themselves be saved4 ,again1 ,some will to the end resist--thou knowest not who2 ,but some--and obstinately choose to die2 ,choice is the fearful privilege of all4 ,now1 toward the man incorrigibly bad1 ,who evil loves and evil makes his good ,forever1 without hope of other change ,than change from worse to worse forevermore-- ,toward such a man1 what must the aspect be ,of the ,supreme ,eternal ,holiness8 ,what but of wrath1 or as of wrath1 and hate8 ,canst thou imagine other face of ,god ,than frown and threat aflame implacable ,against implacable rebellion set1 ,and sin eternal1 to eternal sin ,doomed1 for self-doomed through free unchanging choice8 ,one flame burns love toward love1 and hate toward hate-- ,toward hate that utmost love cannot subdue1 ,the hate that1 like the stubborn diamond-stone ,amid the fiercest fires rebellious1 bides ,still1 in love's sevenfold-heated furnace1 hate4 ,that flame is the white flame of holiness-- ,which ,god is1 and whose other name is love4 ,god is a dreadful thought1 said ,stephen4 ,yea1 ,said ,paul2 such ,jacob felt it when he cried1 ',how dreadful is this place6' and ,bethel named ,the place where ,god was and he knew it not4 ,god is a dreadful thought1 dreadful as sweet-- ,the sweetness and the dreadfulness are one4 ,but never was the dreadfulness so sweet1 ,the sweetness never yet so dreadful shown1 ,as then when ,jesus died on ,calvary6 ,shroud thyself1 ,stephen1 from the dreadfulness1 ,felt to be too intolerably bright1 ,in the cool1 shadowing1 sheltering thought1 so nigh1 ,of mercy1 mercy1 still in judgment sheathed4 ,i feel the buoyance of my spirit sink1 ,oppressed by the great weight of these thy thoughts1 ,said ,stephen2 and my heart is very still4 ,i wait to hear what ,god the ,lord will speak4 ,hearken1 said ,paul4 ,those fearful words of curse ,which late thou nigh hadst turned to blasphemy1 ,daring to lade them with thy personal spite ,against a neighbor man1 whom we must love1 ,until we know hereafter1 which ,god fend6 ,that he bides reprobate1 self-reprobate-- ,those maledictions dire1 through ,david breathed1 ,express not human hate1 but hate divine1 ,revealed in forms of human speech1 and1 too1 ,inspired in whoso can the height attain ,to side with ,god1 and passionlessly damn1 ,as if with highest passion1 any found-- ,whom1 known not yet1 even to himself not known1 ,much less to thee or me1 but known to ,god1 ,and to be known1 in that great day1 to all-- ,fixed in his final choice of evil for good4 ,henceforward1 ,stephen1 when thou sayest that psalm1 ,say it and tremble1 lest thyself be he1 ,the man thou cursest in its awful curse6 ,if it were right1 said ,stephen1 after pause ,prolonged in solemn chiding of himself1 ,if it were right and seemly1 things profane ,to mingle with things sacred so--,i think ,perforce now of a certain tragedy ,i read once by that ,grecian ,sophocles1 ,wherein a ,theban king1 one ,o,edipus1 ,denounces on a murderer frightful doom1 ,dreaming not he--though every reader knows-- ,the murderer he so curses is himself4 ,i shudder when ,i think1 ',were it to be ,that the fierce blasting ,i invoked to fall ,upon another's head1 ,i drew on mine3 ,cursing he loved1 and cursing fell on him6' ,forefend it ,god1 and ,christ with blessing fill ,this heart of mine1 too hasting prone to hate6 ,amen6 said ,paul1 thou prayest for me and thee6 ,out of the depths of the long hush that then ,followed between those midnight travellers1 ,emerging1 like a diver of the sea ,that brings up dripping pearl from sunken cave ,and1 gladdened1 lifts it flashing to the sun1 ,so1 to his young companion speaking1 ,paul-- ,not turning while he spoke his countenance ,toward him1 but fixed right forward keeping it1 ,intent1 as on an object not of sight1 ,before him held with unmaterial hand1 ,an unmaterial treasure passing price1 ,imagined fair by the creating soul-- ,said1 with such cheerful rally in the voice ,as one invites with1 some delight to share3 ,wilt thou hear1 ,stephen8 ,i have been revolving ,in form a kind of hymn concerning love1 ,which1 in a letter1 some twelve months ago1 ,i wrote the church in ,corinth4 ,there was need1 ,for they were sore at strife among themselves1 ,vying with one another to outdo ,in divers showy gifts miraculous1 ,or outward deeds that daze the eyes of men3 ,tongues1 prophecies1 the keys of mysteries1 ,high knowledges1 sublime degrees of faith1 ,almsgivings to impoverishment1 stout heart ,to brave devouring flames in testimony-- ,all these things1 but for lowly love small care6 ,my soul was worn and anxious with my pain ,at such distractions of the church of ,christ2 ,i found my peace at last in this thought1 ',how ,love would heal all1 would gently join from schism1 ,and in one bind the body of the ,lord6' ,a wish ineffable seized me to make ,love lovely to those loveless ones4 ,i had1 ,with the wish born1 and of the wish perhaps1 ,a sudden vision that entranced me quite4 ,i saw love take a body beautiful ,and live and act in most angelic wise2 ,it was as if a heavenly spectacle ,let down before me by a heavenly hand-- ,not to be viewed with unanointed eyes2 ,i touched my eyes with eyesalve and beheld4 ,then a ,voice said1 ',what thou beholdest1 write4' ,i took my pen and sought to catch the grace ,of being and behavior shown to me1 ,and fix it1 as ,i could1 in form and phrase1 ,for those ,corinthians and all men to see4 ,a living picture1 and a hymn1 there grew4 ,hymn ,i may call my eulogy of love1 ,then written1 for indeed it seemed to sing ,within me1 as ,i mused it1 and the tune ,still to the hearing of my heart is sweet4 ,i felt1 and feel1 a kind of awe of it1 ,myself that made it1 for ,i did not make ,it wholly1 ,i myself1 ,i know quite well2 ,a breath divine1 breathed in me1 purified ,my will to will it1 and my soul to sing4 ,my ,stephen will not think it strange that thus ,our talking of an hour ago on hate ,set me to dreaming counterwise of love4 ,i build of love a refuge for myself1 ,whither to run for rest and sanctuary ,from thoughts of hatred thirsting for my soul4 ,love is my house1 and there the air is love-- ,my shelter round about1 the breath ,i draw4 ,no castle is there like my house of love1 ,charmed not to let footstep of evil in2 ,and what will quench the ,wicked's fiery darts ,like love drawn round one for an atmosphere8 ,himself gasps breathless with but love to breathe2 ,yea1 ,i am safe from him if ,i can love4 ,and love ,i can1 through ,christ who strengthens me1 ,whatever natural force ,i feel to hate4 ,i love to love1 it is my chief delight2 ,i triumph by it over all my foes4 ,the harder these my triumph make to win1 ,the more1 since ,i must win it still by love1 ,to love they drive me1 and increase my joy4 ,my triumph is my love1 and my love's joy4 ,but thou my poem hear in praise of love3 ,with men's tongues speaking1 and with angels'1 yet1 ,love lacking1 ,i am sounding brass become1 ,or clanging cymbal4 ,prophecy though mine1 ,and mysteries all to grasp1 and knowledge all1 ,and mine though be all faith so as to move ,mountains1 ,i yet1 love lacking1 nothing am4 ,and though ,i lavish all ,i own in alms1 ,and though ,i yield my body to be burned1 ,yet ,i1 love lacking1 am naught profited4 ,love suffers long1 is kind1 love envies not1 ,love does not vaunt herself1 is not puffed up1 ,deports herself in no unseemly wise1 ,seeks not her own1 is not provoked1 imputes ,not evil1 at unrighteousness no joy ,feels1 but her joy has with the truth1 bears up ,against all things1 all things believes1 all things ,hopes1 undergoes all things4 ,love never fails2 ,but whether there be prophecies1 they will ,be done away1 tongues whether1 they will cease1 ,whether there knowledge be1 it will have end4 ,for we in part know1 and we prophesy ,in part2 but when that which is perfect comes1 ,then that which is in part will pass away4 ,when ,i a child was1 as a child ,i talked1 ,i did my thinking as a child1 ,i used ,my reason as a child2 since ,i a man ,have grown1 the child's part ,i have put aside4 ,for now we darkly1 through reflection1 see1 ,but face to face then4 ,now ,i know in part1 ,but then shall ,i know fully1 even as ,i ,also am fully known4 ,and now these three ,bide1 faith1 hope1 love2 but of these chief is love4' ,stephen1 how little ,shimei guesses1 ,paul ,said1 having thus his hymn of love rehearsed1 ,the secret triumph ever over him ,i celebrate1 in loving him1 despite ,his hating me1 and seeking to destroy6 ,who knows but ,god to love will win him yet8 ,a certain gentle humor exquisite ,enlivened and commended this from ,paul4 ,but ,stephen answered not2 indignant love ,swelled in his heart1 and choked within his throat ,the way of words1 and dimmed his eyes with tears4 ,thus at ,antipatris arrived1 they halt3 ,here ,stephen1 nursing other purpose not ,disclosed1 disclosed to ,paul a wish he had ,to go back with the infantry returning1 ,and reassure his mother that all was well4 ,paul sped his nephew with his benison2 ,and1 after rest had1 and refreshment meet1 ,himself thence1 with the escort cavalry ,safeguarded1 on to ,csarea rode1 ,not lonely1 though alone1 and prisoner4 ,,book ,v4 ,,shimei ,,and ,,young ,,stephen4 ,stephen1 having returned1 goes at once to the chiliarch1 his secret purpose being to convict ,shimei of his crime1 through certain evidence which he thinks he can bring to bear on the case4 ,to the youth's disappointment and chagrin1 he is received coldly and repellently by the chiliarch now much out of humor as a sequel to his disagreeable interview with ,shimei4 ,dismissed crestfallen to go1 ,stephen is suddenly confronted at the door by ,shimei1 at that moment arriving in obedience to a summons from the chiliarch4 ,the mutual encounter has the effect on the chiliarch observing it1 to change his attitude toward ,stephen1 making it favorable again4 ,shimei is sent to ,csarea under suspicion2 where ,felix1 the governor1 plans a hearing for the prisoner ,paul4 ,,shimei ,,and ,,young ,,stephen ,at ,csarea soon the ,sanhedrim1 ,by deputy and advocate1 appeared ,before the bar of ,felix governor1 ,to implead the prisoner ,paul4 ,the high-priest brought ,the weight and dignity of rulership ,supreme among his people1 to impress ,on ,felix fitting sense of the grave cause ,now come before him to be judged4 ,thin veiled ,beneath the decent fair exterior show ,of only public and judicial aim ,and motive in that ruler of the ,jews 7,the high-priest ,ananias71 deep there wrought ,a leaven of personal vindictiveness ,twofold1 sullen resentment of affront1 ,and1 added1 that least placable1 that worst ,hatred1 the hatred toward a brother wronged4 ,whom he1 from his own judgment-seat--profaned ,thus by his profanation of the law-- ,had wantonly commanded to be smitten ,upon the mouth1 this outraged man must now ,be proved1 forsooth1 a wretch unmeet to live4 ,but ,shimei1 as prime mover1 was left1 too1 ,to be prime manager1 of all4 ,far less ,festive1 than his old wont1 in exercise ,of that exhaustless wit his own in wile1 ,serious he now1 yea even to sadness1 seemed4 ,and reason was4 ,for ,claudius ,lysias ,had summoned him to presence in the fort2 ,and there1 hap not to have been imagined1 he1 ,besides the haughty ,roman chief1 had met ,another face more welcome scarce than his4 ,young ,stephen's purpose1 not revealed1 had been ,to move some action against ,shimei4 ,this gentle ,hebrew youth inherited ,large measure of the wilful spirit high ,that in the blood of all his kindred ran4 ,of his own motion he1 without advice1 ,nay1 headstrong1 in the teeth of thwart advice1 ,which1 though he sought it not1 he full well felt ,in current counter to his wish--self-moved ,thus1 and self-willed1 ,paul's nephew had resolved ,to try what might to him be possible-- ,by putting in the place of the accused ,instead of the accuser's1 that base man1 ,his uncle's foe--to free his uncle's state1 ,once and for all1 from danger and annoy ,due to the restless hate of ,shimei4 ,the friendly chiliarch was his first resort4 ,in one swift glance1 which more was of the mind ,itself1 perceiving as it were without ,organ1 than of the eye with which it saw1 ,stephen that night1 upon the point of time ,when ,shimei was arrested and brought in1 ,a glimpse had caught of two receding forms ,of men upon the street1 flying as seemed2 ,whom instantly he knew to be the same ,with that pair of conspirators to slay1 ,whose whispers had revealed their plot to him3 ,these were the stout young fellows ,shimei set ,to lie in wait for the escaping ,paul4 ,the moment they beheld their master seized1 ,they quickly had betaken them to flight2 ,but ,stephen's mind flew faster than their feet1 ,and with intangible tether had them bound4 ,this his new observation of the twain ,made him secure of recognizing them ,whenever or wherever seen again4 ,with so much clue as this1 no more1 in hand1 ,to guide him in the quest of testimony ,that might his crimes bring home to ,shimei-- ,supposed still safe in keeping at the fort-- ,stephen his audience with the chiliarch sought4 ,the bright hope that he brought in coming1 sprung ,from grateful recollection of the grace ,he found1 that morning1 in the ,roman's eyes1 ,was promptly damped to deep dejection now4 ,the chiliarch met him with a cold and sour ,severity of aspect that repelled1 ,beyond the youth's capacity--unbuoyed1 ,for this occasion1 with approving sense ,of well-advised attempt at least1 if vain-- ,to front it with unruffled brow4 ,abashed ,he stood1 confused2 the blood rushed to his face2 ,his tongue clung to his mouth's roof2 and in all ,he less looked like that youthful innocence ,which won the ,roman so in his soft mood1 ,than like the conscious guilt1 uncovered now1 ,in ,shimei's slant insinuation shown4 ,the chiliarch by reaction was relapsed ,into his sternest temper of disdain ,embittered by suspicious cynicism2 ,apt sequel of the interview prolonged ,with ,shimei1 and the final passionate ,ejection of that ,hebrew from the fort4 ,he now awaiting ,shimei1 summoned back ,once more1 to be to ,csarea sent1 ,here was that ,stephen--despicable he ,too1 doubtless1 like his despicable race6 ,such was the prompt involuntary set1 ,inhospitable1 of the chiliarch's thought1 ,for welcome of the youth before him there4 ,to ,stephen's stammering words about those men1 ,and how they might be made to testify ,of ,shimei's desperate plot to murder ,paul1 ,thus bringing ,shimei to deservd doom1 ,the ,roman tartly said3 ,aye1 aye1 young sir1 ,i think it like1 seems altogether like4 ,you ,jews could1 all of you1 ,i doubt not1 swear ,of one another1 brethren as ye be1 ,things damnable enough to crucify ,ye all1 and1 what is more1 for just that once1 ,swear true6 ,but thanks1 lad1 ,i have had my fill ,at present of these proffered services4 ,the manner was dismissory1 more even ,than were the words1 and ,stephen bowed to go4 ,but his own manner in thus bowing changed1 ,although he spoke not1 to such dignity1 ,recovered from his discomposure late1 ,so instantly recovered1 and so pure-- ,adulterate in no trace with hardihood-- ,a dignity comportable with youth1 ,while eloquent of virtue and high mind1 ,and1 like a robe1 so beautifully worn ,over a person and a gesture fair1 ,that ,claudius ,lysias1 cynic as he was ,that moment1 seeing could not but admire4 ,he1 on the point to bid the youth remain1 ,wavering1 not quite persuaded1--at the door1 ,bowing his different bow1 stood ,shimei2 ,that sight and contrast fixed his wavering mind4 ,stay thou1 my lad1 abruptly he exclaimed-- ,wherewith another fall the countenance fell ,of ,shimei1 cringing1 to his footsteps glued4 ,look ye on one another1 ye two ,jews1 ,the chiliarch in a sudden humor said2 ,i have a fancy ,i should like to see ,how two reciprocal accusers such ,as you are1 rogues both--though one young1 one old1 ,in roguery--if your mutual witness hold-- ,i say1 the fancy takes me to observe ,how two accusers of each other1 like ,yourselves1 confronted in close quarters thus1 ,will severally enjoy each other's stare4 ,an indescribable something in the tone ,of ,claudius ,lysias speaking thus1 or look ,perhaps1 couched in the eye or on the face ,playing1 signified clear to ,shimei ,that the same words were differently meant ,to ,stephen and to him2 spoken to him ,in earnest1 in but pleasantry to ,stephen4 ,stephen's high air1 in proud sense of his worth ,wronged by misdoubt1 had ,shimei led astray4 ,he saw it as a sign of prosperous suit-- ,doubtless against himself--just finished there4 ,already tuned to fear1 his conscious mind1 ,quite disconcerted by this fresh surprise ,of some detection that he could not guess1 ,suddenly wrote abroad on all his mien ,a patent full conviction of himself4 ,as more and more his heart misgave him1 worse ,ever and worse his brow was discomposed4 ,the lively opposite of ,shimei's change ,was meantime making ,stephen's face more fair4 ,he1 at the chiliarch's mating of himself ,with ,shimei1 though in veriest raillery meant1 ,felt all the soul of manliness in him ,stung to its most resistant2 as he turned1 ,obedient to the chiliarch's word1 and looked ,at ,shimei1 such transfigurement there passed ,upon him that he stood there glorified4 ,an infinite repellence seemed to ray ,from out his eyes1 and put impassable ,remove between him and that other1 while ,ascendance1 as peculiar to a race ,and rank of being wholly different1 ,endued him1 like a natural right to reign4 ,such kingly to such servile seen opposed1 ,surprised the chiliarch into altered mood4 ,enough1 said he2 and1 writing while those stayed1 ,he gave to ,shimei what he wrote to read4 ,it was a letter ,shimei should himself ,convey to ,felix governor2 it ran3 ,who brings this is a rascal1 as ,i judge2 ,he comes to accuse the ,jewish prisoner ,paul4 ,detain him1 if thee please1 to see the end2 ,the end should be perhaps a cross for him6 ,wincing1 the miscreant read2 he1 reading1 felt ,draw1 from ,rome's hand1 the coil about his neck4 ,choking for speech1 he1 ere he found it1 heard ,the chiliarch say1 with voice hard like a flint3 ,thou hast thine errand2 tarry not1 but go4 ,nay1 bide a moment2 let the youngster see ,what message ,i have given thee to bear2 ,then1 if so chance thou lose it on the way1 ,he can supply thy lack of carefulness6 ,his air that of the miser who1 compelled1 ,gives up gold hoarded1 like his own heart's blood1 ,shimei1 with griping pangs1 in sick recoil ,of grudging overmastered to submit1 ,yielded1 as if he were withholding it1 ,the hateful letter into ,stephen's hand4 ,stephen1 as one not daring otherwise1 ,deigned a reluctant look1 that1 seeking not1 ,yet seized1 the sense of that which ,shimei showed2 ,softened1 he gave the parchment back to him4 ,prodded with such oblique sarcastic spur ,to heed of sinister commission such1 ,shimei withdrew1 a miserable man4 ,the chiliarch then to ,stephen--who1 at once ,pity of ,shimei's utter wretchedness1 ,shame of his utter abjectness1 conceived-- ,said1 with changed tone3 ,my lad1 ,i think thee true2 ,that miscreant vexed me into petulance4 ,thou hast not altogether missed thy mark ,in coming hither now1 although ,i thus ,seem to let ,shimei for the present slip4 ,follow him1 if thou wilt1 to ,csarea4 ,with letter of ,bellerophon in charge1 ,he carries his own sentence thither hence2 ,watch it--if slow in execution1 sure6 ,sobered by triumph1 and not triumphing1 ,made pensive rather1 ,stephen went away4 ,forth from the hour when ,shimei1 so dismissed1 ,shrank out of presence at ,antonia ,collapsed in spirit as in mien and port1 ,he to the end was seen an altered man4 ,dejected1 absent1 like a criminal ,convicted of his crime1 sentenced to die1 ,though day of death unfixed1 imprisoned not1 ,nay1 moving1 as if free1 about the world1 ,to view not different from his fellow-men1 ,yet with a sense forever haunting him ,of doom uncertainly suspended still ,above him1 that at any moment might ,in avalanche descend upon his head-- ,so he lived joyless1 the elastic spring ,broken that buoyed him to his wickedness4 ,but loth he had to ,csarea gone1 ,where1 with wry looks and deprecation vain1 ,he gave the letter to the governor2 ,had he1 to ease his case1 dared fail the trust1 ,the failure would have failed his case to ease1 ,nay1 rather1 would have harder made his case1 ,since ,stephen could report what he did not1 ,and could besides report his negligence4 ,but ,shimei dared not fail2 he knew offence1 ,added1 of disobedience1 would but draw ,speedier the dreaded danger ruining down4 ,joy is to some a spring of energy1 ,which failing1 all their force for action fails-- ,they having in themselves no virtue proof ,against the palsying touch ill fortune brings2 ,of such was ,shimei4 ,in his broken state1 ,his measures he took feebly1 without hope4 ,the wish--which with the expectation joined ,would have made hope--yea1 even the very wish1 ,that life and strength of hope1 was well-nigh dead ,in him2 for he no longer now desired ,the thing he wrought for still1 under constraint ,of habit1 and that strange necessity ,which sense of many eyes upon him fixed ,to watch him working the familiar wont ,of ,shimei1 bred within this wretched man1 ,forcing him like a fate4 ,fit tool he found ,in one ,tertullus--hireling ,roman tongue1 ,or function mere1 not organ--who1 for price1 ,spoke customary things accusing ,paul ,to ,felix1 for the ,jews2 these joined their voice ,in sanction of the truth of what he said4 ,but ,paul denying their base charges all1 ,denying and defying to the proof1 ,the governor postponed them for a time4 ,paul he remanded into custody1 ,but bade with courteous ways distinguish him2 ,whereof the secret cause was1 not a sense ,in ,felix of the righteousness of ,paul1 ,with therefore sweet magnanimous desire ,to grace him what in loyalty he could-- ,of no such height was ,felix capable-- ,the cause none other was than ,shimei2 ,who ,paul however served not1 but himself4 ,for ,shimei dreaded what he seemed to seek1 ,the sentence ,guilty1 at the judgment-bar ,of ,felix on this prisoner ,paul pronounced2 ,dreaded it1 lest appeal therefrom be claimed ,by ,paul to the imperial ear at ,rome4 ,he himself1 ,shimei1 then might be compelled ,to go likewise the same unwelcome way1 ,though witness and accuser only named1 ,yet labelled target for suspicious eyes1 ,where eyes suspicious oft portended doom4 ,so he to ,felix--less with words than signs1 ,mysterious looks and reticences deep1 ,as of a man who could1 if but he would1 ,and were it wise1 tell much that1 left untold1 ,might well be guessed from things kept back1 yet thus1 ,and thus1 and thus 7in ,shimei's pantomime7 ,winked with the eye and with the shoulder shrugged-- ,hint signalled that there hid a gold mine here1 ,for who1 with power like his1 conjoined the skill ,to make it yield its treasure to demand2 ,this ,paul had wealthy friends who gladly would ,buy at large price indulgences for him4 ,let ,felix hold out hopes1 deferring still1 ,suffer his friends to come and visit ,paul1 ,give hearings to his case1 but naught decide1 ,weary him out1 and them1 with long delays-- ,till a realm's ransom woo his clutch at last4 ,now ,shimei thus consummately contrived2 ,for ,felix was a mercenary soul1 ,who governed in the spirit of a slave4 ,he1 therefore1 doubting not that ,shimei 7,confessed the player of a double part1 ,pander to him1 accuser for the ,jews7 ,was all the rascal that the chiliarch guessed1 ,yet deemed he saw his profit in the man4 ,he could use ,shimei to his own behoof1 ,in winning what he coveted from ,paul2 ,meantime remitting not his hold on him ,for final expiation of his crimes4 ,the two1 well fitted to each other1 thus ,played each his several sordid game with each1 ,and neither by the other was deceived1 ,both equally incapable of trust1 ,as equally unworthy to be trusted-- ,until1 two years accomplished1 ,felix fell ,from power at ,csarea2 when1 his greed ,long disappointed of its glut of gain ,from ,paul1 he left him there in prison4 ,he hoped ,the dreaded accusation of the ,jews ,for his abuse of power1 surpassing bound1 ,might less fierce follow him to ,rome1 should he1 ,by that injustice added1 in their eyes ,his thousands of injustices atone4 ,moreover ,felix hated ,paul1 as hates ,the upbraided ever his upbraider1 when1 ,the conscience yielding1 yet the will withstands4 ,for1 during the imprisonment of ,paul1 ,and that prolonged delay of trial due ,him1 this base freedman--basely raised to be ,a ruler--as a pleasure to his wife1 ,devised a feast of eloquence for her4 ,she was a ,jewess1 beautiful as vile1 ,and as in beauty brilliant1 so in wit2 ,she would enjoy it1 like a spectacle1 ,to sit1 in emulated state1 a queen ,beside her husband in his judgment-hall1 ,and there1 at ease reclined1 her lord's delight1 ,in her resplendent and voluptuous bloom1 ,disport herself at leisure1 eye and ear ,tasting their satisfaction to the full1 ,to see and hear her famous countryman ,expound his doctrine and defend his cause4 ,not often1 in his rude ,judan seat ,of government in banishment1 could he ,proffer the stately partner of his throne ,an equal hope of entertainment rare4 ,so1 royal in their pomp of progress1 came1 ,one day1 the lustful ,felix with his bride1 ,adulterous ,drusilla1 guilty pair6 ,and1 on his throne of judgment seating him1 ,bade ,paul before them1 in his prisoner's chain1 ,to burn the splendors of his oratory ,in pleading for the faith of ,jesus ,christ-- ,fresh pastime to the cloyed and jaded sense ,for pleasure those voluptuaries brought6 ,uncalculated thrills1 not of delight1 ,that lawless ,roman ruler had purveyed ,himself1 to chase each other in their chill ,procession through the currents of his blood1 ,and1 shuddering1 shoot along his nerves1 and freeze ,his marrow6--conscience in him her last sign ,making perhaps that day4 ,but will he heed8 ,or will the terrors of the world to come ,vainly appal him with the eternal fear8 ,,book ,,vi4 ,,paul ,,before ,,felix4 ,paul discourses solemnly before ,felix and his queen ,drusilla1 treating the topics of righteousness1 self-control1 and impending judgment4 ,the effect is to make ,felix show visible signs of discomposure on his judgment-seat4 ,drusilla1 apprehensive of consequences disastrous to herself from her wicked husband's awakened remorse and fear1 invokes the intervention of ,simon1 that ,cyprian ,jewish sorcerer who had at first been instrumental in bringing the guilty pair together4 ,simon plays upon the superstition of ,felix with his pretended magic arts4 ,,paul ,,before ,,felix4 ,the power of the ,most ,high1 descending1 fell ,on ,paul1 as1 led of soldiers1 he came in1 ,bound1 at the mercy of the governor1 ,and took his station in that presence proud4 ,at once1 but without observation1 changed ,became the parts of ,felix and of ,paul4 ,paul1 from a prisoner of ,felix1 now ,to ,felix was as captor and as judge2 ,and ,felix was as prisoner1 bound1 to ,paul4 ,paul his right hand in manacles stretched forth1 ,as if it were a scepter that he swayed1 ,and said3 ,most excellent lord ,felix1 hear1 ,and thou1 ,drusilla1 unto ,felix spouse6 ,obedient1 at thy bidding1 ,i am come ,to make thee know the faith in ,jesus ,christ1 ,and wherefore ,i obey it1 and proclaim4 ,know1 then1 that ,jesus1 ,he of ,nazareth1 ,the ,crucified of ,calvary1 is ,christ1 ,the ,christ of that ,jehovah ,god ,most ,high ,who by ,his word created heaven and earth1 ,and ,him anointed to be ,lord of all4 ,god was incarnate in ,him here on earth1 ,to reconcile the world unto ,himself2 ,and ,i beseech men--,i1 ambassador ,from ,him1 as if the ,lord ,god did by me ,beseech--beseeching them1 ',be reconciled ,to ,god4' ,for all men everywhere are found ,by wicked works ,god's enemies2 on all1 ,god's wrath1 weight insupportable1 abides2 ,a message this1 that down from heaven ,he brought1 ,that ,christ of ,god1 that ,savior of the world4 ,but ,his atonement lifts the load of wrath1 ,which down toward hell the sinking spirit weighed1 ,lifts1 nay1 transmutes it to a might of love1 ,which bears the spirit soaring up to heaven4 ',believe in ,jesus1 and be reconciled ,to ,god'2 that is the gospel which ,i preach4 ,obey my gospel1 and be saved--rebel1 ,and pray the mountains to fall down on thee ,to hide thee from the wrath of ,god1 and hide ,thee from the wrath1 more dreadful1 of the ,lamb4 ,for ,lamb was ,jesus1 when on ,calvary ,in sacrifice for sin ,he died2 but when1 ,resurgent from the tomb1 above all height ,into the heaven of heavens ,he rose1 and sat ,on the right hand of glory and of power ,with ,god1 then the ,lamb slain from far before ,the world was founded1 by ,his blood our guilt ,to purge1 as capable of wrath became1 ,as ,he before was capable of love4 ,he burns against unrighteousness1 in flame ,which1 kindling on the wicked1 them devours4 ,there is no quenching of that fearful flame1 ,as ending none is there of what it burns2 ,the victim lives immortally1 to feed ,the immortal hunger of that vengeful flame4 ,it swifter than the living lightning flies1 ,to fasten on its victim in his flight2 ,no refuge is there in the universe ,for fugitive from it4 ,thou1 ,felix1 knowest ,no hider can elude the ranging eyes1 ,no runner can outrun the wingd feet1 ,no striver can resist the griping hands1 ,that to the emperor of the world belong2 ,whom ,csar wishes1 ,csar has for prey4 ,paul fixed his gaze point-blank on ,felix while ,these things he said1 not as with personal aim-- ,which might have been resented1 being such1 ,resented1 and thereby avoided quite-- ,rather as if1 through body1 he beheld ,his hearer's soul1 and set it with his eyes ,far forward into the eternal world1 ,and there saw the fierce flame he spoke of1 fast ,adhering or inhering1 burn that soul1 ,with burning unescapable by flight ,or refuge through the universe of ,god4 ,paul's vision was so vivid that his eyes ,imprinted what he saw upon the soul ,of ,felix1 that almost he saw it too4 ,he stared and listened1 with that thought intense ,wherewith sometimes the overmastering mind ,will blind the eyesight and the hearing blur4 ,a sense of insecurity in power1 ,bred in him by his consciousness of crime1 ,with dread1 too1 of the moment1 then perhaps ,already nigh6 when that omnipotence1 ,that omnipresence1 that omniscience1 ,rome's1 ,might beset him1 to cut him off from hope-- ,this feeling blindly wrought the while beneath1 ,like struggling earthquake1 to unsettle him2 ,thus weakened1 half unconsciously1 his will ,fell childlike-helpless in the power of ,paul4 ,now fear hath torment1 and to ,felix1 prey ,of fear with torment1 ,paul still added fear2 ,perhaps his fear intolerable grown ,might save the sufferer from the thing he feared6 ,paul further said3 ,o ,felix1 ,csar's sway ,over this world1 inevitable thus1 ,subduing all1 is yet but image pale ,of the supreme dominion absolute ,which to ,christ ,jesus in the heaven belongs4 ,the captives of the emperor need but wait ,patient a while and sure release arrives2 ,since death at least1 to all1 or soon or late1 ,comes1 one escape at last from ,csar's power1 ,who owns no empire in that world beyond4 ,but of that world beyond1 no end1 no bound1 ,whither we all must flee in fleeing hence1 ,still the ,lord ,christ abides eternal ,king2 ,death is but door to realm of ,his more wide4 ,here1 the sheathed sword of ,his avenging ire ,will sometimes touch1 undrawn1 with blunted edge1 ,the wincing conscience of the wicked man ,that knows himself a criminal unjudged4 ,those touches are the mercy of the ,lord ,that would betimes the guilty soul alarm2 ,those pains of conscience are the smouldering fires ,which1 quenched not now in sin-atoning blood1 ,will1 blown to fury1 by and by burst forth1 ,and1 fuelled of the substance of the soul1 ,that cannot moult its immortality1 ,one inextinguishable vengeance burn4 ',be wise now1 therefore1 ,o ye kings1 be ye ,instructed1 judges of the earth2' so ,god ,cries in our ,scriptures in the ears of men4 ',kiss ye the ,son1' ,he says1 'in homage kiss ,the ,son of ,mine anointing1 ,christ the ,lord1 ,kiss ,him lest ,he be angry1 and ,his wrath ,ready to be enkindled you devour4 ,but in the living scriptures of the soul ,itself1 the holy word of ,god in man1 ,the selfsame admonition beats and burns-- ,if men would read it and would understand6 ,the raging of desire not satisfied1 ,the sickness of the surfeit of desire1 ,the ravages of passion uncontrolled1 ,and waste of being1 by itself consumed1 ,to bury or deface what else were fair-- ,like lava spouted from the crater's mouth ,of the volcano burning its own bowels ,to belch them torrent over fertile fields-- ,these things1 ,o ,felix1 in the conscious heart1 ,are muffled footfalls of oncoming doom4 ,peculiar commination seemed to flame1 ,volcanic1 in ,paul's manner as he spoke4 ,one might have felt the figure prophecy-- ,for some fulfilment in this present world ,impending to be symbol of his thought-- ,his likening of the self-consuming soul1 ,disgorging desolation round about1 ,to a volcano its own entrails burning1 ,and in eruption pouring them abroad2 ,so real1 so living1 so in imminent act1 ,paul's speaking made his fiery simile4 ,drusilla1 when1 long after1 with her son ,agrippa1 born to ,felix1 overwhelmed ,in that destruction from ,vesuvius ,which under ashen rain and lava flood ,pompeii rolled with ,herculaneum1 ,like ,sodom and ,gomorrah whelmed again6-- ,drusilla then1 despairing1 for one fierce ,fleet instant--instant endless1 though so fleet-- ,saw1 as from picture branded on her brain1 ,heard1 as from echo hoarded in its cells1 ,the very image of the speaker's form1 ,his posture1 gesture1 features in their play1 ,these1 and the tones1 reliving1 of the voice ,wherewith1 in ,csarea judgment-hall1 ,he fulmined1 yea1 as if this self-same wo6 ,but ,paul1 no pause1 immitigably said3 ,belshazzar1 ,babylonian king of old1 ,once in a season of high festival ,held in his palace with a thousand lords1 ,saw visionary fingers of a hand ,come out upon the palace walls and write4 ,then that king's countenance was changed in him1 ,in answer to the trouble of his thoughts2 ,the very jointings of his loins were loosed1 ,and his knees1 shaken1 on each other smote4 ,in language that he did not understand1 ,but prophet ,daniel told the sense to him1 ,belshazzar had his own swift ruin read4 ,thus1 ,o lord ,felix1 in our hours of feast1 ,oft1 ,,mene1 ,,mene1 ,,tekel1 ,,upharsin1 ,dread warning to us that the end is come1 ,that we have been full proved and wanting found1 ,that now our vantage must another's be-- ,appalling words of final doom from ,god1 ,in lurid letters live along the walls ,of the soul's pleasure-house--for who will heed6 ,remorses1 doubts1 recoils1 forebodings1 fears1 ,and fearful lookings for of judgment nigh1 ,previsions flashed on the prophetic soul ,refusing to be hooded not to see-- ,these are handwritings on the wall from ,god2 ,they1 syllabling the sentence of ,his ire1 ,spell ,,mene1 ,,mene1 ,,tekel1 ,,upharsin1 ,for pleasure-lovers lost in lust and pride4 ,well for ,belshazzar1 if betimes he heed6 ,had ,felix been alone1 deep in the dark1 ,and a wide waste of solitude around1 ,a comfort it had seemed to him to loose ,one mighty agitation of his frame ,and shiver his blood-curdling terror off2 ,or1 in one wanton1 wild1 voluptuous cry1 ,shriek it into the startled universe4 ,but1 seated there upon his throne of power1 ,drusilla by his side regarding him1 ,to tremble1 like a culprit being judged1 ,before a culprit waiting judgment6 ,he1 ,with last resistant agony of will1 ,kept moveless his blanched lips1 and on his seat ,sat stricken upright1 and so stared at ,paul4 ,there ,paul stood tranquil1 choosing thunderbolts1 ,and this the thunderbolt that last he launched3 ,hearken1 ,o ,felix4 ,in the clouds of heaven1 ,attended by the angels of ,his might1 ,the ,lord ,christ ,jesus ,i behold descend4 ,the trumpet of the resurrection sounds1 ,and sea and land give up their wakened dead2 ,these all to judgment hasten at ,his call3 ,the books are opened and the witness found2 ,all the least thoughts of men1 with all their words ,and deeds1 all their dumb motions of desire1 ,their purposes1 and their endeavors all1 ,are written in the record of those books4 ,they blaze out in the light of that great day4 ,like lightning1 fixed from fleeting1 on the sky2 ,deem not one guilty can his guilt conceal4 ,a parting of the evil and the good2 ,the good at ,his right hand ,he bids sit down1 ,the awful ,judge1 omnipotent as just2 ,the evil1 frowning1 bids from ,him depart4 ,swift1 them departing--who would not know ,god1 ,and not obey the gospel of ,his ,son-- ,he1 taking vengeance1 follows in their flight ,with flaming fire and dreadful punishment1 ,destruction everlasting from ,his face1 ,from the ,lord's face1 and glory of ,his power6 ,the shudder that had slept uneasy sleep ,within the breast of ,felix lulling it1 ,woke startled at these minatory words ,spoken as with the voice of ,god by ,paul4 ,that couchant shudder from its ambush broke1 ,and openly ran wantoning over all ,the members of the terror-stricken man4 ,but the cry clamoring in him for escape1 ,to ease the anguish of his mortal fear1 ,felix found strength to modulate to this1 ,in forced tones uttered1 and with failing breath3 ,go thy way this time1 ,paul2 at season fit ,hereafter ,i will call for thee again4 ,the soldier duly led his prisoner out1 ,and ,felix was full easily rid of ,paul2 ,of ,paul1 but of ,paul's haunting presence not ,the image of that orator in chains1 ,the solemn echo of the words he spoke1 ,swam before ,felix1 sounded in his ears1 ,so real1 the real world round him seemed less real4 ,drusilla1 to her discomposure1 found ,her husband strangely alien from his spouse2 ,the blandishments so potent with him late ,lost on an absent or repellent mind4 ,the awe of ,felix under ,paul's discourse ,she had remarked with unconcerned surprise4 ,she now recalled it with a doubt1 a fear4 ,the jealous thought woke in her3 ',if my lord ,should1 overwrought in conscience1 cast me off6 ,what byword and what hissing then were ,i1 ,stranded and branded an adulteress6 ,i1 who the scion of a kingly house1 ,haughty ,antiochus ,epiphanes1 ,haughtily spurned as suitor for my hand1 ,because he would not for my sake be ,jew2 ,who wedded then ,azizus1 eastern king1 ,willing to win me at the price ,i fixed2 ,who next with scandal parted from his bed1 ,to snatch this dazzle of a ,roman spouse-- ,i to be now by him flung to the dogs6 ,all at the beck of an apostate ,jew1 ,arraigned a culprit at his judgment-bar6 ,drusilla1 rouse thee1 say1 ,it must not be6 ,drusilla1 arm thee1 swear1 ,it shall not be6' ,she summoned straight that ,cyprian sorcerer who ,had played the pander's part between herself ,and ,felix1 when they twain at first were brought ,in guilt together4 ,simon1 know1 she said1 ,i with cause hate this ,jewish prisoner ,paul4 ,he1 insolence intolerable1 is fain ,to come between my ,roman lord and me4 ,withstand him1 and undo his hateful spell4 ,his hateful spell1 ,o stately queen1 my liege1 ,said ,simon1 ,i far rather would assay ,unbinding from thy spouse's soul enthralled1 ,than him withstand1 the binder of that spell1 ,meeting him face to face4 ,at ,paphos once1 ,of ,cyprus1 ,elymas1 a master mind ,in magic--at the court proconsular ,of ,sergius ,paulus1 regent of the isle1 ,wielding great power--withstood this self-same ,paul4 ,but ,paul denounced a curse deipotent ,against him1 and forthwith upon his eyes ,a mist fell and a darkness1 that he walked ,wandering in quest of one to lead him1 late ,redoubtable magician1 by the hand4 ,this conjuration on the conjurer1 ,himself proconsul ,sergius ,paulus saw1 ,and1 overpowered with wonder and with fear1 ,roman and governor as he was1 became ,fast docile dupe and devotee to ,paul4 ,perhaps indeed there was a cause for this ,older in date than such a feat of ,paul's4 ,long years before1 when ,paul and he were young1 ,by chance they fared together on the way ,damascus-ward out of ,jerusalem1 ,when1 nigh ,damascus1 of a sudden1 ,paul ,on ,sergius tried a novel magic trick4 ,in broad noon1 with unclouded sun ablaze ,above him1 burning all that tract of sand1 ,he flashed a sheen of mimic lightning forth1 ,with stage effect of thunder overhead ,muttering words4 ,thereon as dead fell ,paul1 ,yet to that unintelligible voice ,from heaven intelligible answer made1 ,pretending dialogue with some unseen ,high dweller in the upper air1 with whom ,colluding1 he thenceforth his spells of power ,might surer1 deadlier1 fling on whom he would4 ,sergius was then too full of youth to yield2 ,the lusty blood in him fought off the spell2 ,but somewhat wrought upon1 no less1 was he1 ,and secretly1 in mind and will1 prepared ,to fall in weaker age a prey to ,paul4 ,a potent master ,paul is in his kind1 ,owning some secret from us others hid1 ,that makes our vaunts against him void and vain4 ,i would not needlessly his curse provoke ,by too close quarters with him front to front4 ,his spell on ,felix ,i may hope to solve1 ,let me but have thy husband by himself1 ,in privileged audience safe apart from ,paul2 ,i will see ,felix1 but ,paul let me shun4 ,so ,simon to his moody master went1 ,and1 well dispensing with preamble1 said3 ,what will mine excellent lord ,felix please ,command the service of his servant in8 ,unbidden thou art present1 ,felix frowned4 ,so bidden ,i retire1 the mage replied4 ,nay1 tarry1 with quick wanton veer of whim1 ,said ,felix1 tarry and declare to me1 ,if with exertion of thy skill thou canst1 ,what is it that this hour perturbs my thought8 ,answer me that1 pretender to be wise1 ,or own thy weird pretensions nothing worth4 ,no paltering1 no evasion1 doubling none ,in ambiguity like oracle1 ,but instant1 honest1 simple1 true reply2 ,else1 ,i have done with all thy trumpery tricks1 ,haply1 too1 with some certain fruits thereof ,that thee buy little thanks1 as me small joy4 ,my master pleases to make hard demand1 ,in couple with condition hard1 to-day1 ,the sorcerer1 with dissembled pleasure1 said4 ,simon full ready felt to meet his test2 ,for1 in an antechamber to the hall ,of judgment1 he1 with ,shimei too1 had lurked1 ,and1 overhearing ,paul's denouncement1 marked ,the trepidation of the judge's mien4 ,lord ,felix suffers from an evil spell ,cast on him by a wicked conjurer2 ,so1 with deep calculation of effect1 ,the sorcerer to the sovereign firmly said4 ,a hit--perhaps1 said ,felix1 some relief ,of tension to his conscience-crowded mind ,welcoming already in the hint conveyed2 ,repeat to me1 he added1 keen to hear1 ,repeat to me the phrasing of the spell2 ,that ,i may know it not a groping guess1 ,but certain knowledge1 what thou thus hast said4 ,that challenge flung to ,simon's hand the clue ,he needed for his guidance in the maze4 ,he sees the ,roman's superstitious mind ,in grapple with imaginative awe ,infused by recollection of those words ,barbaric--of comminatory sound1 ,though understood not1 therefore dreaded more-- ,which ,paul1 two several times1 in his discourse1 ,had solemnly recited in his ear4 ,the spell1 he said1 ,o ,felix1 that enthralls ,thee was of three ,chaldan words composed2 ,but one word was repeated1 making four4 ,i dare not utter those dire syllables ,in the fixed order which creates the spell4 ,my wish is to undo1 and not to bind4 ,felix was frightened1 like a little child ,told ghostly stories in the dead of night2 ,he watched and waited1 with set eye intense4 ,the conjurer1 standing in struck attitude1 ,made with his voice an inarticulate sign ,intoned in tone to thrill the listening blood4 ,thereon1 in silence1 through the opening door1 ,with gliding motion1 a familiar stole ,into the chamber1 which now more and more1 ,to ,felix's impressionable fears1 ,as if a vestibule to ,hades was4 ,that noiseless minister to ,simon gave ,into his master's hand a rod prepared4 ,hearken1 lord ,felix1 low the conjurer said1 ,hearken and heed4 ,well needs it thou1 with me1 ,fail now in nothing through a mind remiss4 ,hear thou aright1 while ,i aright reverse ,the order of the phrasing of that spell4 ,beware thou think it even no otherwise ,than as ,i give it1 weighing word and word4 ,i turn the sentence end for end about1 ,,upharsin1 ,,tekel1 ,,mene1 ,,mene1 say2 ,all is not done1 still keep thy mind intent1 ,and1 with thine eyes now1 as erst with thine ears1 ,watch what ,i do1 and let thy will consent4 ,therewith his wizard wand he waved in air1 ,as who wrote viewless words upon the wind4 ,a hollow reed the wand he wielded was1 ,with secret seed asleep of fire enclosed4 ,this1 at the end that in his hand he held2 ,powder of sulphur at the other end ,was hidden in the hollow of the reed4 ,the sulphur and the fire1 unconscious each ,of other1 had1 though neighboring1 since apart1 ,slept2 for the sorcerer's minion brought the rod1 ,as first the sorcerer held it1 levelled true4 ,but with the motion of the magian's hand1 ,the dipping virgule sent the ember down ,the polished inner of its chamber-walls1 ,and breath let in to blow it living red1 ,until it touched the sulphur at the tip4 ,issue of fume there followed1 edged with flame1 ,and wafting pungent odor from the vent1 ,which1 woven in circlet and in crescent1 seemed ,to knit a melting legend on the air4 ,so vanish and be not1 thou hateful spell1 ,and leave this late so vexd spirit free6 ,with mutter of which words1 the sorcerer turned ,to ,felix1 and thus farther spoke3 ,breathe thou1 ,lord ,felix1 from that bond emancipate4 ,yet1 that thou fall not unawares again ,beneath its power1 use well a countercharm ,i give thee1 which1 both night and day1 wear thou ,a prophylactic to thy menaced mind4 ,gold--let the thought1 the motive1 the desire1 ,the purpose1 and the fancy1 and the dream1 ,not leave thee nor forsake thee till thou die4 ,the sight1 the sound1 the touch1 the clutch1 of gold ,is sovereign absolution to a soul ,beset like thine with fear of things to be ,beyond the limit of this mortal state2 ,but1 failing that1 the thought itself will serve4 ,the thought at least must never absent be1 ,if thou wouldst live a freeman in thy mind4 ',freedman1' he would have said1 but did not dare2 ,he had dared much already in his word1 ',freeman1' so nigh overt allusion glanced ,at the opprobrious quality of slave1 ,out of which ,felix sprang to be a king4 ,to that1 contempt and hatred of a lord ,served but from hard self-interest and from fear ,had irresistibly pressed ,simon on ,beyond the bound of calculated speech4 ,therewith1 and waiting not dismissal1 both1 ,the sorcerer and his minion1 silently ,slid out of presence1 and left ,felix there ,to rally as he might to his true self4 ,but1 not too trustful to his sorcery1 ,simon thought well to follow and confirm ,the influence won on ,felix through his art1 ,with worldly wisdom suited to his end4 ,he bade ,drusilla open all access ,ever for ,shimei to her husband's ear1 ,and even from her own treasure help him ply ,felix's avid mind with hope of gold-- ,assured to him through earnest oft in hand-- ,an ample guerdon in due time to come ,from ,paul's rich friends to buy release for ,paul4 ,at ,csarea1 in the judgment hall ,that day1 a solemn crisis of his life1 ,to ,felix1 he not knowing1 there had passed4 ,successfully1 with sad success6 he had ,resisted conscience in her last attempt1 ,her last and greatest1 to alarm a soul ,sufficiently to save it from itself4 ,at length1 with the still process of the days ,dulled1 and besides with opiate medicines drugged1 ,that conscience1 so resisted1 sank asleep1 ,sank dead asleep in ,felix1 to awake ,never again4 ,he indeed sent for ,paul ,afterward oft1 and talked with him at large2 ,but always only in that sordid hope-- ,blown to fresh flame with seasonable breath1 ,that never failed1 from ,shimei1 prompt in watch ,to play on his cupidity--the hope ,of princely ransom from his prisoner won4 ,such hope1 so kept alive1 led this bad man-- ,although he hated ,paul for shaking him ,to terror1 and to open shameful show ,of terror1 in his very pitch of pride-- ,to palter with his prisoner1 month by month1 ,until the end came of his long misrule4 ,then1 hope deferred1 defeated hope at last1 ,let loose the hatred that in leash had lain ,of avarice1 in the kennel of that breast1 ,and ,felix found a sullen feast for it ,in leaving ,paul at ,csarea bound4 ,,book ,,vii4 ,,to ,c,,sar4 ,paul1 in preferred alternative to being judged1 as was proposed1 by his murderous fellow-countrymen1 appeals to ,csar4 ,he is in consequence embarked on a ship for ,rome4 ,with him sail certain kindred and friends of his1 young ,stephen among them4 ,fellow-voyagers with him are also ,felix and ,drusilla1 fallen now from power and under cloud at ,rome4 ,shimei and ,simon the sorcerer are of the company4 ,the voyage is described1 together with some of the notable prospects of the coasts along which the vessel sails4 ,shimei plots against the life of ,paul4 ,his plot is thwarted by young ,stephen1 and the culprit is thrown into dungeon in the hold under chains4 ,,to ,c,,sar4 ,during the years of his captivity ,under that wanton hand at ,csarea1 ,paul's sister1 with her ,stephen1 brought their home ,thither1 and there abode1 for love of ,paul2 ,that they might minister to him1 and be ,ministered to by him in overflow ,of his far more exceeding rich reward4 ,thither came also others of the ,way1 ,drawn by like love1 to serve the same desire4 ,of these was martyr ,stephen's widow1 ,ruth1 ,a stately lady1 with the matron's crown ,of glory in her wealth of silver hair1 ,and with the invisible pure aureole ,of living saintship radiant round her brow4 ,with her1 a daughter1 left to ,ruth alone ,among her children--wedded all beside4 ,her youngest-born1 and fairest1 was this one1 ,eunic named2 a gift from ,god to ,ruth ,after her husband's martyrdom bestowed4 ,eunce bore her father's image1 lined ,softer with girlhood and with yielding youth1 ,both in her features and her character4 ,the light that in her lovely countenance ,shone lovelier1 was not playful1 did not flash1 ,but sat there tempered to an equal beam1 ,selen-like1 that one might look upon1 ,from far or near1 dwelling however long1 ,with sense of rest and healing to the eye2 ,you seemed to gaze upon the evening star ,in sole possession of a twilight sky4 ,it was as if the father's zeal intense-- ,which1 kindling on his way to martyrdom1 ,shone into brightness dazzling like the sun-- ,descended to the daughter1 were suffused ,so1 and so qualified1 with woman's love1 ,that it undazzling like the moon became4 ,eunic1 such in queenly womanhood1 ,already to young ,stephen was betrothed2 ,they waited only till the years should bring ,full ripeness1 with meet circumstance1 to wed4 ,mary of ,magdala kinswoman was ,to ,ruth4 ,she1 long afflicted1 from before ,her marriageable season1 with the haunt ,in her of evil spirits vagabond ,from the abyss1 had1 then to woman grown1 ,met ,jesus in ,his rounds of doing good ,and been by ,him delivered from her woe4 ,seven demons1 at ,his word1 went forth from her1 ,foul inmates of a mansion passing fair4 ,mary to her ,divine ,deliverer gave ,her life thenceforth one long oblation up4 ,with other women1 like herself in love ,of ,him1 she followed that ,immanuel ,whithersoever ,he went about the world1 ,and of her treasure lavished on ,his need4 ,she stood bewailing when they crucified ,her ,lord1 and1 after1 at ,his sepulcher ,the earliest1 ere the breaking of the morn1 ,saw two fair-shining angels clothed in white1 ,one at the head1 the other at the feet1 ,sit where the body of the ,lord had lain4 ,these talked with ,mary1 who then turning saw1 ,but knew not1 ,jesus1 face to face with her4 ,but ,jesus to the weeping woman said3 ,mary6 and1 in the hearing of her name1 ,she forthwith knew the voice that uttered it4 ,in her delight of love1 she would have touched ,his person1 to assure still more her mind1 ,save that again that voice1 forestalling1 gave ,enough assurance for such faith as hers4 ,mary refrained her hand1 but full well knew ,no fleeting phantom1 no dissolving show1 ,no spirit only1 angel of the dead1 ,stood there before her in the form of ,him2 ,but her ,lord ,christ ,himself1 ,his flesh and blood4 ,this ,mary ,magdalen1 in such wise ,first to such joy delivered from such woe1 ,then witness of so much theophany1 ,thenceforward lived1 unwedded to the end1 ,a life of watching for her ,lord's return1 ,true to ,his promise1 in the clouds of heaven2 ,not idle watching1 watching unto prayer ,and unto almsdeeds to ,his glory done4 ,in the due sequel of the days1 she came1 ,bidden by her kinswoman ,ruth1 to share ,her widow's home with her and help her peace4 ,thus then1 the much-experienced ,mary1 meek ,with wisdom and with holy meekness wise 7,her sorrow all to cheerful patience turned7 ,unnoticed1 not unfelt1 as light1 as strength ,unconscious1 from the ,source of strength1 of light ,daily renewed1 for guidance and support ,to all within her happy neighborhood-- ,she also1 ,mary ,magdalen1 came ,to ,csarea1 yoked in fellowship ,with ,ruth and ,rachel1 ministrant to ,paul4 ,these all1 with others1 still intent to ease1 ,if but by sharing1 what to ,paul befell1 ,were minded to go with him even to ,rome-- ,when ,festus1 following ,felix dispossessed1 ,sent ,paul away to ,csar's judgment-seat1 ,fulfilling so the wretched ,shimei's fear4 ,for--,festus asking ,paul 7accused afresh ,before him from ,jerusalem by ,jews ,afresh to hope reviving with the change ,from ,felix to a different rulership73 ,wilt thou hence go unto ,jerusalem1 ,and there by thine own countrymen be judged8-- ,the wary wise apostle1 well forewarned ,touching the deadly ambush1 to waylay ,him in the journey thither1 set once more ,by ,shimei1 desperate and forlorn1 had said3 ,i am a prisoner at the judgment-bar ,of ,csar2 to my countrymen have ,i ,no wrong done1 as thou knowest2 if any crime ,be mine1 if ,i have perpetrated deed ,worthy of death1 ,i do not shun to die4 ,but if of such act ,i be innocent1 ,then no man may to them deliver me4 ,roman am ,i1 to ,csar ,i appeal4 ,that answer was as word omnipotent1 ,to be unsaid1 gainsaid1 resisted1 never2 ,and ,festus was its servant and its thrall4 ,there sailed a ship of ,adramyttium 7,in ,mysia of the ,asian ,province west1 ,from ,lesbos in a deep recess withdrawn ,of bay in the gean1 neighboring ,troy7 ,which touched at ,csarea in its course ,coastwise1 now northing on the ,syrian shore4 ,festus on board this vessel quartered ,paul1 ,with soldiers to convoy him safe to ,rome2 ,a maniple1 by a centurion ,commanded1 ,julius named1 a ,roman he ,worthy of the imperial name he bore4 ,for he of clement grace was capable1 ,and of sagacity to know a man1 ,though of despisd race and charged with crime1 ,and1 knowing1 yield to him his manhood's claim4 ,julius the profit of his virtue reaped2 ,he1 in the issue of that voyage1 will ,through favoring ,paul save his own soul alive4 ,those kin and lovers of the prisoner1 who ,had for his name to ,csarea come1 ,would not forsake him sailing thence away2 ,they all1 in one accord of fellowship1 ,willed to sail with him on his way to ,rome4 ,besides these1 there was ,luke1 a loyal soul1 ,well learnd in the lore of medicine1 ,who loved ,paul1 and with joy his right hand lent1 ,joining thereto the service of his eyes1 ,to fix for the apostle1 at his need1 ,in written record1 his thick-coming thoughts-- ,ease for those weary organs overworn ,with labors and with watchings2 haply1 too1 ,touched with effect from that excess of light6 ,historian of the voyage likewise ,luke1 ,as1 guided by the heavenly-guided ,paul1 ,who thus redeemed long prison hours else waste1 ,historian of the life of ,christ the ,lord4 ,so many1 with a man from ,macedon1 ,a faithful1 ,aristarchus named1 made up ,the little company who loving hearts ,linked1 shield to shield1 in phalanx fencing ,paul4 ,if they could serve him little on the sea1 ,at least they could be with him there2 and then1 ,should long delays of law1 or of caprice1 ,hold him still bound in ,rome1 they would be nigh ,to bring him1 daily1 comfort of their love4 ,so1 doubting not1 not fearing1 all for love1 ,these changed their fixd gear for portable1 ,and on that ship of ,adramyttium1 ,facing whatever fortune unforeseen1 ,cheerfully sailed--to tempest and to wreck6 ,scarce well bestowed within that ,asian bark1 ,riding at anchor in her rock-fenced haven1 ,those ,christian pilgrims felt unwonted stir ,rouse round them on the crowded deck1 with surge ,on surge of movement1 of expectancy1 ,as when a rising surf beats the sea-beach2 ,while1 huddling here1 here parting1 all made way ,to let who seemed high passengers of state ,enter with gorgeous pomp and pageantry1 ,forerun and followed by a various train4 ,felix it was1 in sumptuous litter borne1 ,drusilla with him1 looking still the queen3 ,from power they fallen1 were fallen not from pride4 ,with them1 besides their troop of servitors1 ,came other two1 strange contrasts3 ,simon one1 ,the conjurer1 fast to their joint fortune bound1 ,beginning to be gray with rime of age1 ,as sinister grown in look through habit of guile2 ,a little lad tripped lightly by the side ,of ,simon 7who his evil genius looked7 ,leading him by the hand upon the ship4 ,this little lad was little ,felix1 son ,of ,felix and ,drusilla1 and dear to them1 ,felix ,agrippa the lad's double name4 ,felix went summoned from his province back ,to give at ,rome account of his misrule4 ,behind the sorcerer1 following in that train1 ,went last1 as one who unattached would seem1 ,shimei1 compelled1 though prisoner not2 he strove ,to carry lightly a too heavy heart4 ,felix so much from ,festus had obtained1 ,that ,shimei should go forward with himself ,as witness and accuser both to ,paul2 ,yet sinister suspicion shadowing him1 ,with information laid against1 the while1 ,as the ringleader in a plot of crime4 ,the unhappy legate would at least detach ,thus from his own leagued ,jewish foes1 the ,jew1 ,the one ,jew1 who1 best knowing and hating him1 ,with the least scruple the most genius joined ,to crowd him falling1 to the farthest fall4 ,fairly the lading and unlading done1 ,and all things ready1 the good ship puts forth4 ,the oarsmen sat in triple ranks that rose ,tier above tier along the vessel's side2 ,with cheer of voice that timed their rhythmic stroke1 ,they1 all together1 many-handed1 bent ,over the supple oars1 well-hung arow1 ,and beat the waters into yeast and foam4 ,the wieldy trireme answered to their will1 ,and1 past the towers and domes of ,csarea1 ,along a windless way under the lee ,of sea-walls fending from the bluff southwest1 ,pushed to the north beyond the harbor-mouth4 ,here the wind took her1 freshening from behind1 ,and1 sail all set1 they rested from the oar4 ,softly and swiftly1 with such favoring gale1 ,they prosper1 and1 along the storied coast ,close cruising1 soon discern the headland height1 ,mount ,carmel1 with his excellency crowned ,of forest1 and wide overlooking east ,the plain outrolled of great ,esdraelon ,washing with waves of green the mountain's feet-- ,mountain whereon1 in single-handed proof1 ,elijah those four hundred priests of ,baal ,gave to contempt2 and1 whence descending1 he1 ,red with indignant wrath for his ,lord ,god1 ,by the brook ,kishon slew them to ,his name4 ,this ,paul remembered1 as he passed2 and deemed ,he saw1 hallowing the hills of ,nazareth1 ,a halo from the childhood of the ,lord4 ,from horn to horn across a crescent bay1 ,embosomed by its arc of shore that curved ,from ,carmel round to ,ptolemais north1 ,faring1 they could1 well inland gazing1 catch ,a glimpse that vanished of the shapely cone ,of ,tabor soaring in his ,syrian blue4 ,still onward1 they next day the ancient seat ,of famous ,sidon in ,phoenicia reached-- ,long ruined now1 with her twin city ,tyre2 ,then1 paired with her as mistress of the main1 ,sidon sat leaning on her promontory1 ,diffused along its northward-sliding slopes1 ,like a luxurious queen on her divan4 ,her sailors drove her keels to every haven1 ,and fetched her home the spoil of every clime4 ,to ,farthest ,thul was the ocean wave ,white with her sails or spumy to her oars4 ,felix's hope of splendid bribe from ,paul ,was brighter1 that1 of those who brought him cheer ,in prison1 some from wealthy ,sidon came4 ,here the ship touching1 ,julius1 of his grace1 ,granted to ,paul the freedom of the shore4 ,with grateful gladness there1 ,sidonian friends1 ,women and men1 with children1 welcome him4 ,full in mid-winter1 lo1 a moment's spring6 ,so did a sudden-blossoming scene of home ,smile briefly bright about this homeless man1 ,this prisoner of the ,lord--for the ,lord's sake1 ,and for his own sake1 dear--most human heart6 ,in whom his office of apostle wrought ,to heighten1 not to hurt1 the faculty1 ,as it left whole the lovely need1 of love4 ,he went thence clothed upon the more with sense ,of love his from so many1 like a shield ,barring his heart from harm2 and in his heart ,love buoyant more to bear what harm must fall4 ,from ,sidon sailing1 they1 still northward driven ,by wind that would not let them as they wished ,southwestward to the south of ,cyprus isle ,win with right way the ,mysian port1 their aim-- ,so hindered1 those ,greek seamen warp their wake ,with zigzag steering over whitening waves1 ,until they feel that current of the sea1 ,northwestward with perpetual ocean-stream ,washing the ,cyprian shore to easternmost1 ,thence veering toward the mainland1 and along ,the ,asian border drawing to the west4 ,there1 on such river in the ocean borne ,whither they will against a wind adverse1 ,they1 wise with much experience of the sea1 ,yet in the lee of neighboring ,cyprus seek ,a pathway sheltered from that roughening wind4 ,so1 forward fairly1 the ,cilician sea ,they traverse1 with the mountains on their left1 ,sheer through the length of sunny ,cyprus drawn1 ,building a sea-wall1 to break off the wind4 ,over against1 to be descried1 though far-- ,well by two hearts on board that vessel felt1 ,paul and his sister ,rachel--to the north1 ,lay the long reach of the ,cilician shore4 ,those 7thither strained their homeward-yearning eyes7 ,there1 tearful1 saw remembered ,taurus tower2 ,whence river ,cydnus rushing snow-cold down1 ,wild from his mountain to the stretched-out plain1 ,tames him his torrent to a pace more even2 ,and yields to be a navigable stream ,for ,tarsus1 cleft two-fold1 upon his banks1 ,a seaboard city inland from the sea4 ,dear places of the playtime of their youth6 ,gray river1 with its everlasting flood1 ,libation from the mountain to the sea2 ,the wharves1 the ships1 the sailors1 travelled men1 ,motley in garb and polyglot in speech2 ,the lading landed or to be embarked-- ,mysterious bales of costly merchandise ,tempting to guess what treasures might be there6-- ,the hallowed sabbath in that ,hebrew home ,islanded in its sea of heathenism6 ,the sabbath seasons in the synagogue6 ,the reverend ,scriptures of the ,jewish law1 ,by father and by mother taught to them1 ,so diligently taught1 day after day1 ,and talked of in their ears1 alike when they ,sat in their house and when they walked abroad1 ,and when they laid them down and when they rose2 ,beheld too for a sign bound on the hand1 ,likewise for frontlets worn between the eyes6-- ,all these things like a flood-tide of the sea ,swelled on those homesick kindred hearts1 while they1 ,brother and sister1 distant many years ,from what they saw1 from what much more they felt1 ,seen or unseen1 on that familiar shore1 ,alien and heathen1 yet1 being native1 sweet1 ,lapsed into musing of the pensive past4 ,half they in words1 but half in silence1 mused4 ,far-off by years1 yet more by difference far1 ,said ,paul to ,rachel1 are we two withdrawn ,from what we were in our ,cilician home4 ,that dearer is to us to dream of so1 ,remembering and imagining1 than it were ,to see2 it is not what we knew it once1 ,with the child's heart we carried in us then4 ,we should not find the places that we loved2 ,nay1 for we should not know them--with these eyes4 ,they have not so much changed1 but we have changed4 ,yea1 doubtless1 changed we are1 ,rachel replied2 ,yet1 ,i at least1 ,o ,saul1 not so much changed ,but that it would delight me still to see ,those haunts of happy childhood--more endeared ,to me1 as to my brother more1 ,i know1 ,from father's and mother's memory hovering there4 ,i loved my mother and ,i honored her1 ,but my own motherhood has taught me how ,i might have better loved and honored her6 ,we must not at past failures vainly pine-- ,so ,paul1 to ,rachel sorrowing tenderly-- ,but rather let them make us wiser now4 ,thy lesson1 sister1 let it teach us both ,how to be children to our ,father ,god4 ,these earthly kinships all are parable ,of the enduring kinships of the skies4 ,we are to be to ,god1 as children dear1 ,what parents would their children were to them1 ,so full of love with fear1 of trust with heed1 ,and imitators of ,his heavenly ways4 ,and is it1 brother1 ,rachel gently asked1 ,indeed to thee so easy ever thus ,to lose the earthly in the heavenly thought1 ,and in the symbol find the symbolized1 ,that only1 ,saul8 ,it is not so with me4 ,i love the letter1 and ,i cling to it-- ,a little2 at least when it is so fair ,as ,i have found it in my motherhood4 ,the spirit is far fairer1 ,i suppose1 ,but ,god has made this letter 'very good'6 ,rachel spoke thus with deprecation sweet1 ,the while a little liquid sparkle played ,of loving humor in her eyes half turned ,toward ,stephen sitting nigh them but apart2 ,he and ,eunic sat together there4 ,cling to thy lovely letter1 ,paul replied1 ',a little1' as thou sayest it1 not too much-- ,the 'little1' as the 'not too much1' ,god's will ,for thee1 my sister2 and1 a paradox6 ,the little will be more when not too much4 ,it is the spirit makes the letter dear1 ,or dearest1 as it is itself more dear4 ,we better love the earthly images ,of things in heaven1 when we those heavenly things ,themselves more than their loveliest shadows love4 ,o brother1 ,rachel--suddenly her voice ,sunk to a vibrant low intensity ,of accent--said1 hands clasped and eyes upturned ,to him1 ,o brother1 when such things thou sayest1 ,i tremble with unspeakable desire ,to be what one must be to think such things4 ,but it is all too wonderful for me4 ,that inspiration of the ,holy ,ghost ,whereby thou knowest what else thou wouldst not know-- ,perhaps that helps thee be1 as well as know8 ,nay1 sister1 ,paul replied1 it is not so4 ,that inspiration is a gift to me ,for knowing only1 not for being4 ,yea1 ,and even my gift to know is not for me1 ,more than for thee1 my ,rachel1 and for all4 ,it is that all may know1 ,god makes me know4 ,i profit by my awful trust from ,god ,of farther vision in ,his mysteries1 ,only as ,i a faithful steward am ,to part to others what ,i hold from ,him3 ,freely ,i have received freely to give4 ,but besides this there is a grace of ,god ,in ,jesus by the ,holy ,spirit given1 ,that comes alike to all obedient souls ,to help them in the life of holiness4 ,the habit of the heavenly mind which thou ,attributest to me in what thou askest1 ,this ,i have learned1 if it indeed be mine1 ,by being to the ,spirit teachable1 ,who teaches all as fast as each will learn4 ,he could far faster teach us1 and ,he would1 ,if only we were teachable enough4 ,alas1 we strangely hold the flood-gate down ,not to let all the waiting fulness in4 ,but what of holy willingness ,i have ,he gives1 ,who worketh in me both to will ,and work1 for the good pleasure of ,his name4 ,amen6 breathed ,rachel1 in devout accord ,with ,paul's ascription of all good to ,him4 ,by this1 the night had settled on the sea1 ,an interlunar night bereft of stars1 ,for the dark azure of the deep was black ,to blackness of the overhanging heaven ,hung thick with clouds4 ,see1 ,rachel added soon1 ,how the sky lowers6 ,god fend us all from storm6 ,good night1 my brother4 ,david's word for me1 ',in peace will ,i both lay me down and sleep1 ,for ,thou1 ,lord1 only makest me to dwell ,in safety4' ,yea1 in safety also here1 ,o sister1 ,paul said2 for the sea is ,his1 ,he holds it in the hollow of ,his hand4 ,brother and sister parted with a kiss-- ,kiss from the kindred habit of old time ,dear1 but far dearer in a dearer love1 ,and1 with some sense of reconcilement1 sweet4 ,therewith the sister to her pillow went2 ,but ,paul abode to vigil on the deck4 ,he pacing to and fro1 the night wore on1 ,and one by one his fellow-passengers ,withdrawing left him more and more alone4 ,a sheen of phosphorescence on the sea ,kindled along the running vessel's side1 ,and drew a trail of brilliance in her wake1 ,splendid a moment and then vanishing1 ,devoured by the immensity of dark ,which made it for that moment so intense4 ,paul saw this1 less admiring what he saw1 ,beautiful though it was and wonderful1 ,than musing what it seemed to mean for him3 ',so my soul on her voyage through the world ,lights her own pathway as she moves along2 ,bright ever where she is she makes her place1 ,and ever plunges on into the dark ,before her2 but her latter end is light6' ,meanwhile1 of all the lingerers on the deck ,amid that darkness1 only two remained4 ,these1 as they might1 watched him now bending there ,in wistful gaze over the vessel's side ,downward into the waters weird below3 ,stephen was one2 the other1 ,shimei4 ,but ,shimei had crept later on the deck1 ,when the increasing dark veiled all from view ,save what was moving or what stood upright2 ,so he knew not of ,stephen now reclined1 ,motionless in a trance of pleasant dream1 ,there where ,eunic left him1 when she too ,with ,rachel from the open night retired4 ,the youth had lapped him in a happy muse ,of memory of the things they twain that eve ,had shared in converse2 it was like twilight ,prolonging softer the full light of day4 ,shimei thought darkly3 ',could yon leaning form ,lean farther1 and embrace indeed the wave ,he yearns toward1 this enticing murky night6 ,there were redemption ready-wrought for me-- ,who might be spared1 forsooth1 accusing whom ,his own forestalling conscience had condemned1 7,so it should look67 and forced him on to die4 ,vengeance is mine and recompense1 as saith ,our ,moses1 hinting of a moment when ,their foot shall slide4 ,ha6 ,ha6 ,it fits the case6 ,their foot shall slide6 ,feet may be brought to slide6 ,the deck is slippery with the spray2 a tip ,forward above1 with a trip backward1 so1 ,from underneath'--and ,shimei acted out ,in pantomimic gesture his quick thought2 ',an accidental movement1 were it seen1 ,but it would not be seen4 ,a fine dark night1 ,no moon1 no stars1 and the whole hollow sky ,ink-black with clouds that when ere long they break ,will spit ink-rain into an inky sea6 ,finger of ,god6 ,it were impiety ,not to obey a pointing such as this4' ,his propense thought plunged him a step toward ,paul4 ,stephen hereon1 stretched out upon the deck1 ,marking the sinister action of the man ,shadowed upon the dark1 a denser dark1 ,noiselessly gathered up his members all1 ,ready to rush at need to rescue1 yet ,reserved1 alert1 to watch and to await1 ,like leopard couchant tense in poise to spring4 ,that instant1 a new dimness in the dark1 ,a swimming outline1 figure of a man ,approaching1 with a rustle of approach ,hinted1 no more1 amid the rising wind4 ,this ,stephen knew1 and ,shimei1 both at once4 ,shimei recoiled2 he thought1 ',well paused for me6 ,i might have been detected1 after all6' ,then1 gliding toward that shadowy moving form1 ,he met--a ,roman soldier1 front to front1 ,nigh ,stephen where he lay in ambuscade ,unpurposed1 but now vigilant all ear ,for what might pass between those men so met4 ,a sudden shift of phase to ,shimei's thought1 ,in altered phase persistent still the same4 ,the desperate fancy seized him to essay ,corrupting that custodian of ,paul4 ,a helpless fixed fatuity of hate1 ,a dull insistent prodding from despair1 ,robbed him of reason1 while of cunning not3 ,he could warp wisely toward an end unwise4 ,suspected by the ,roman1 by the ,jew ,no longer trusted as of old--since seen1 ,those years at ,csarea1 changed and chilled ,so from his pristine ardor in pursuit ,of ,paul--,shimei saw nothing now before ,him in the future but the nearing close ,in a blind alley1 opening none beyond1 ,of the strait way wherein perforce he walked4 ,one gleam of light1 of possible light1 ahead1 ,he now descried4 ,if ,paul could somehow be ,utterly cancelled from his case1 no ,paul ,anywhere longer in the world1 and if1 ,ah1 if1 ,o rapture6 ,paul could disappear ,confessing guilt by seeming suicide-- ,that were the one deliverance left to hope1 ,hope if forlorn1 at least1 at least1 a hope4 ,shimei his foot set softly in the snare4 ,with slow and sly ambages of approach1 ,he sounded if the soldier were of stuff ,to be in safety tampered with1 and how4 ,close at his feet1 but guarded from their touch ,by a low heap of cordage coiled between1 ,there ,stephen lay the while1 a breathless corpse1 ,and listened--with his body and his mind ,both utterly all organ to attend-- ,as ,shimei with that shifty cunning his1 ,insidious1 like the entrance of disease1 ,wormed him into the bosom of his man1 ,instilling the temptation1 sweet with bribe1 ,to make away with his ,jew prisoner4 ,it would but give the wretch's wish effect-- ,so ,shimei glozed with subtle speciousness-- ,should now his gentle keeper intervene ,to end the endless waverings of a mind ,on self-destruction bent1 a suicide ,who only lacked the courage of despair1 ,by tossing ,paul headforemost overboard4 ,three points thereby were gained1 and nothing lost3 ,a criminal would meet his just desert1 ,one fain to die his heart's desire obtain1 ,and he1 the soldier1 no one wiser1 take ,the profit1 gold in hand1 of a good deed4 ,thou knowest1 the tempter said1 the feel of gold1 ,the weight1 and therewith thrust some pieces broad ,into the soldier's hand1 the antepast ,and warrant of a ready rich reward4 ,if question should arise involving him1 ,why1 nothing easier than to say and swear1 ,the prisoner1 conscious of his guilt1 and now ,quite at the end of all his hopes by wile1 ,had used the favoring cover of the night ,to make a sudden spring into the brine4 ,he1 heedful of his duty and his charge1 ,had promptly put the utmost effort forth ,to seize him1 and defeat the dire attempt4 ,but desperation was too masterful ,in force and quickness1 to be so forestalled4 ,the fates and furies buoyed him overboard ,and plumped him to the bottom of the deep4 ,then1 were his single witness held in doubt1 ,why1 by good luck1 here was a passenger ,who saw the fellow fetch his frenzied leap1 ,and saw his watchman hold him back in vain2 ,he1 ,shimei1 would not fail him at the pinch1 ,to swear him clear of any touch of blame4 ,the soldier1 to this word1 had little spoke1 ,nothing that might import his secret thought1 ,heed giving in blank silence1 ominous1 ,or hopeful1 for his tempter1 dubious which4 ,now he spoke1 saying3 ,glibly dost thou talk1 ,making the task light1 laughable the risk4 ,know it is perilous business1 this of thine4 ,yon ,paul appears a prisoner of note1 ,whom our centurion1 for his reasons1 treats ,with favor--,for his reasons1 yea2 well said1 ,interposed ,shimei2 but such reasons fail ,promptly when the purse fails that yields them4 ,end ,already1 as ,i know1 was reached with ,paul1 ,when he at ,sidon bought his leave to land1 ,hoping a rescue4 ,but1 the soldier said1 ,paul seems indeed to be a worthy man4 ,a wise head1 thou1 the wily ,jew replied2 ',seems1'--thou hast once more hit it in that word6 ,fair-seeming truly1 rotten at the core4 ,however that may be1 the guard rejoined1 ,rotten or sound the man1 it were a deed1 ,a bold deed1 deed of risk and price1 to do ,what thou requirest4 ',willing1' ,shimei thought1 ',willing1 but greedy2 bid for higher pay6 ,bait him his fill1 no time for higgling now4' ,he said3 ,bold enterprises to the bold4 ,yea1 there is risk2 no need to make it small2 ,it is a soldier ,i am talking with4 ,but ,i will amply match the risk with wage4 ,thy peril stint not thou1 ,i not thy pay4 ,here is a scrip stuffed out with yellow gold1 ,test it for weight1 thou earnest it all this night4 ,the soldier had but meant to parley3 now ,this toying with temptation by the touch1 ,added to his long dalliance through the ear1 ,proved penetrant1 seductive1 so beyond ,his forethought1 that he stood amazed1 appalled1 ,listening1 to feel how much he was enticed4 ,he might have yielded to the sorcery1 ,but ,stephen1 with an instant instinct wise1 ,sudden sprang1 speechless1 imminent1 to his feet4 ,the soldier at the apparition took ,a fine air of indignant virtue on4 ,rascal1 said he1 ,i have trolled thee well along ,from point to point and let thee talk and talk1 ,and my palm tickle with the touch of gold1 ,or counterfeit of gold1 thou counterfeit ,of man6 ,thou hast shown thyself for what thou art4 ,thy proffered bribe ,i keep for proof of thee2 ,but thou1 thou goest with me my prisoner4 ,a night in irons down in the deepest hold ,may give thee waking dreams thy morrow's chance ,with the centurion hardly will dispel6 ,therewith he stalked off ,shimei1 stunned to dumb ,and dizzy1 with that deafening crack of doom4 ,scarce less astonished and scarce less dismayed1 ,stephen stood stricken on the staggering deck2 ,the roaring of the unregarded wind ,less noisy than the tumult of his thoughts4 ,the contrast of the horror of such crime ,to the sweet peace and pleasure he but now ,was tasting in the hallowing afterglow ,of those bright moments with ,eunce spent2 ,the frightful danger overpast for ,paul2 ,the retribution1 like a thunderbolt1 ,fallen on ,shimei2 these1 with remembrance mixed ,of what the chiliarch1 wiser than he knew1 ,said1 touching ,shimei with that letter charged ,of sinister import to ,csarea1 ,he carries his own sentence thither hence-- ',unwritten sentence in his bosom1 yea1 ,he carried1 and he carries1 wretched man6' ,thought ,stephen4 ',and what dire things in the world6 ,and ,god from heaven beholds and suffers all6 ,and what will be the end1 if ever end1 ,of all this tale of wickedness with woe ,drawn out from age to age1 through clime and clime6' ,such thoughts on thoughts held ,stephen hanging there ,unnoted minutes1 till the dash of rain ,in great drops threatening deluge smote his face ,like hailstones1 and awoke him to the world4 ,at the same moment1 ,paul--who had not dreamed ,of the swift1 muffled1 darkling tragedy ,of plot and peril1 shame and crime and doom1 ,just acted nigh him in that theater1 ,and microcosm afloat of the wide world-- ,broke up the long lull of his reverie ,above the running waters1 heard1 scarce seen1 ,beneath him1 by the hasting vessel's side-- ,as if a symbol of the mystery ,of things1 an-hungered to devour all thought6-- ,and turned to shroud him from the weather wild4 ,the uncle and the nephew met1 but spoke ,only a peace and farewell for the night2 ,stephen not finding in his heart to break ,to ,paul the ill good news of what had passed4 ,with the rain falling1 soon the wind was laid1 ,planed was the sea1 and cleansed of cloud the sky4 ,bright the stars looked innumerably down ,on the ship smoothly sped her prosperous way4 ,,book ,,viii4 ,,shimei ,,before ,,julius4 ,the centurion ,julius1 having in charge the prisoners on board including ,paul1 examines ,shimei1 accused of his crime by the sentinel whom the crafty ,hebrew had sought to bribe4 ,shimei makes a desperate effort to clear himself by bringing a countercharge against ,paul of the same murderous attempt through bribe upon his1 ,shimei's1 life4 ,almost on the point of succeeding1 he is confronted first with ,felix1 then with ,stephen1 last with ,paul--to his complete undoing4 ,,shimei ,,before ,,julius4 ,the waking dreams of ,shimei1 in his chains ,and darkness1 were not altogether those ,foreshadowed by the soldier bitterly ,to him--dreams of foreboding and despair ,only2 that ,roman had not learned that ,jew4 ,the touch and prick of uttermost dismay ,stung him to one more struggle for himself4 ,ere ,julius1 with the morning1 had him forth ,to inquest from his dungeon1 that quick brain ,had ripe and ready1 conjured up in thought1 ,for self-defense1 with snare involved for ,paul1 ,a desperate last compacture of deceit2 ,desperate1 yet deftly woven1 and staggering1 ,till the contriver was now quite undone1 ,confronted with ascendant truth and power4 ,what sayest thou1 ,jew1 with challenge lowering stern1 ,asked the centurion of his prisoner1 ,in answer to the charge against thee laid8 ,what say8 with shrug of shoulder ,shimei said2 ,why1 that thy soldier was too strong for me1 ,and haled me and bestowed me as he would1 ,while at his leisure then his tale he told1 ,forestalling mine1 to prepossess thine ear4 ,i come too late2 for ,i should speak in vain4 ,worse than in vain such words as those thou speakest4 ,out on thine insolence1 thou ,hebrew dog6 ,savagely the centurion said4 ',too late'6 ',too late'6 ,know1 ,jew1 too late it never is1 ,where ,roman justice undertakes1 for one ,accused of crime to answer for himself4 ,true judge's ear cannot be 'prepossessed4' ,even now1 deserving1 as thou art1 to be ,buffeted1 rather than aught further heard1 ,speak on and say thy say2 but give good heed ,thou curb thy tongue from insolence and lies4 ,from lying ,i shall have no need my tongue ,to guard1 said ,shimei2 but from insolence-- ,beseech thy grace1 a plain blunt man am ,i1 ,will it be insolence1 if ,i inquire ,what is the crime that ,i am charged withal8 ,curtly the ,roman said3 ,attempt to bribe ,a soldier1 and a ,roman soldier he1 ,to break his oath and be a murderer4 ,no stint of generous measure to the charge1 ,said ,shimei2 yet ,i ought not to complain1 ,i1 who a charge of ampler measure would ,myself have brought 7as well as he knew who now1 ,and for that very cause1 accuses me7 ,had ,i been first2 and first ,i should have been1 ,but for duress1 and also this he knew1 ,thence the duress--outrageous act from him1 ,lese-majesty committed against thee6-- ,i say1 had ,i beforehand been with him ,to gain thine ear and a foul plot disclose4 ,the soldier stood in stupid blank amaze1 ,with silence by his discipline enforced1 ,to hear this frontless impudence of fraud4 ,he so much looked the guilt in slant implied ,by ,shimei1 that no marvel ,julius glanced ,from one to the other of the two1 perplexed1 ,each the accuser and accused of each4 ,his soldier was a trusty man supposed2 ,the ,jew came clouded and suspect as false3 ,but always it was possible repute ,accredited a man1 or blamed1 amiss4 ,thou riddlest like an oracle3 be plain ,and outright1 so to ,shimei ,julius spoke4 ,thou hast vaguely shadowed some worse shape of crime ,thou couldst reveal than that which seems revealed1 ,accused to thee4 ,what could be worse misdeed ,than breach attempted of a soldier's faith ,to purchase murder8 ,breach accomplished1 said ,shimei1 were worse2 and1 in a just assay1 ,worse to attaint the honor of a man ,upright and good and true1 and of him make ,a criminal worthy of death1 and doomed ,as such to die3 yea1 a far darker crime ,than were purveyal of the needed stroke ,to end a little earlier some base life1 ,forfeit at any rate by guilt1 and fain ,itself to court such refuge from despair4 ,still more were worse the crime whereof ,i speak1 ,let the man so attainted in his truth ,be one that moment bearing office grave ,as an accuser and a witness sworn ,against such very criminal himself4 ,then is the crime no longer merely crime ,against the single man however just1 ,but crime against justice itself and law1 ,and even against the outraged human race4 ,there was a stumbling incongruity-- ,blasphemous1 had it been less whimsical1 ,whimsical1 had it been less blasphemous-- ,between the man himself and what he said4 ,his words were noble1 or had noble been ,but that the ignoble man who uttered them ,gainsaid them with the whole of what he was4 ,the soldier more and more astounded stood1 ,or cowered1 say rather1 underneath the frown ,beetling and imminent of falsehood such1 ,mountainous high1 and like a mountain set ,immovable4 7,immovable it seemed1 ,but at its heart with fear was tremulous1 ,and1 to the proper breath1 would presently ,melt1 like cloud-mountain massed of misty stone ,to the wind's touch47 ,as in a nightmare1 he ,could no least gesture move to give the lie1 ,browbeaten half to disbelieve himself4 ,julius1 nonplussed to see his soldier's air ,almost confessing judgment on himself1 ,skeptic1 yet therewithal impressed despite1 ,imposed on even1 by a mock-majesty1 ,the specious counterfeit of virtue wroth ,but1 though wroth1 calm in conscious innocence1 ,couched in the lofty words of ,shimei1 ,while by his aspect blatantly belied-- ,julius1 thus wondering1 curious1 frowned and said3 ,cease from preamble1 and forth with thy charge6 ,no further swelling phrases1 large and vague2 ,but facts--or fictions--in plain terms and few4 ,audience at length prepared1 so ,shimei deemed1 ,his story1 well before prepared1 he told3 ,i lingered late last night upon the deck3 ,slow pacing up and down for exercise1 ,i strict bethought me how ,i best might quit ,the serious task committed to my hands ,of seeking sentence on a criminal ,there at the fountain and prime spring of law ,and justice1 that august tribunal last1 ,the imperial seat at ,rome4 ,while ,i thus mused1 ,the ,providence that1 dark sometimes and slow1 ,as to us seems1 does after all pursue ,the flying footsteps of foul crime with scourge1 ,or human vengeance help to overtake1 ,showed me a light1 which1 alas1 quickly then ,by envious evil powers in turn was quenched4 ,for it so fell that in the exceeding dark1 ,unseen1 ,i overheard the prisoner ,paul ,broach a new plot of bribery and wrong4 ,he promised to the soldier keeping him ,large money--earnest offered1 and received1 ,i plainly heard it clink from hand to hand4 ,the soldier winced beneath the meaning glance ,shot at himself wherewith the subtile ,jew ,spoke these last words2 winced1 and sore wished1 too late1 ,that1 as he first had purposed1 he had shown ,in proof to the centurion ,shimei's gold ,shoved for a bribe into his hand1 but here ,adroitly turned to use against himself4 ,what if his captain1 prompted by such hint1 ,should now demand to see that dastard gold6 ,he had been silent touching it because ,his mere possession of it would1 he felt1 ,look too much like his paltering with a price2 ,but1 after ,shimei's words1 to have it found ,upon him6 ,with such disconcerting thoughts1 ,the soldier listened like a criminal1 ,as ,shimei with calm iteration said3-- ,thus would ,paul buy his keeper to forswear ,against the one man he most feared1 myself1 ,that ,i had sought to bribe a soldier's faith1 ,bargaining with him to fling overboard ,his prisoner and so rid him from the world4 ',thou sawest1' ,paul told the soldier1 'how at ,sidon ,an ample sum was put into his hands ,by wealthy friends there'3 he all this now pledged ,to be his keeper's1 no denary short1 ,if but he would traduce me thus1 and so ,both break the damning power ,i else could wield ,against him1 and1 besides1 my life destroy4 ,thy soldier yielded3 grievous wrong indeed1 ,yet him ,i can forgive1 for less as bribed ,he faltered1 than as overcome he fell4 ,paul is the master of an evil art ,to make his subject firmly hold for true ,what1 free from sorcery1 he would know was false4 ,he1 in the very act and article ,of sketching what his victim was on me ,to father1 the illusion could in him ,produce of hearing his own words from me4 ,a trick ,paul has of vocal mimicry-- ,sleight of longiloquence1 whereby he throws ,to distance1 as may like1 his uttered words1 ,to make them seem another's1 not his own-- ,aided him here2 ,i hardly knew1 myself1 ,hearing him speak1 but that the voice was mine4 ,thus ,i account for it1 that1 without blame ,so much to him himself1 he being deceived1 ,this worthy soldier1 whom ,i never wronged1 ,doubtless an honest fellow in the main1 ,should in effect malign me so to thee4 ,in my simplicity1 and in my faith ,undoubting that1 confronted fair with truth1 ,falsehood must needs take on its proper shape1 ,then shrivel1 ashamed to be at all1 ,i sprang ,suddenly up1 discovered to the pair4 ,i never dreamed but they would at my feet ,fall1 and for mercy sue2 which ,shimei-- ,soft-hearted ever for another1 where ,only himself is wronged1 however hard ,he steel his heart where stake is public good-- ,had doubtless weakly granted out of hand4 ,but1 to my wonder1 and1 ,i own1 dismay-- ,this for the moment1 but that weakness passed-- ,at a quick sign from ,paul1 the soldier seized ,me and consigned to dungeon for the night4 ,what followed more on deck1 ,i can but guess4 ,i doubt not ,paul completed work begun ,in this poor soldier's mind1 and fixed his faith ,that all had happened as he made report4 ,i pray thee judge his error lightly2 he ,was of another's will1 against his own1 ,possessed1 loth pervert of a power malign4 ,the soldier1 hearing1 was now witched indeed4 ,partly his sense of flaw in rectitude-- ,then suffered when he paltered with the bribe ,proffered by ,shimei--shook him2 and partly he ,descried a shift of refuge for himself ,from dreaded blame at his centurion's hands-- ,should ,julius1 as looked likely more and more1 ,at length accept the ,hebrew's tale for true-- ,in letting it appear that ,paul in fact ,had wrought upon him so as ,shimei said1 ,to cheat him into honest misbelief4 ,this was the deeply calculated hope ,wherein that glozer1 plotting as he went ,with versatile adjustment to his need-- ,need shifting1 point by point1 from phase to phase-- ,provided for the soldier his escape ,from the necessity of holding fast1 ,in self-defence1 to his first testimony4 ,thus1 if all prospered1 ,shimei1 yea1 might yet ,save to himself the future chance to use ,this soldier1 more amenable to use4 ,paul's keeper1 thus prepared to falter1 heard ,ambiguous challenge from the officer3 ,what sayest thou1 soldier8 ,wast beside thyself8 ,dazed1 hast thou then denounced the innocent man8 ,whereto ambiguous answer thus he framed3 ,if ,i have done so1 it was in excess ,and haste of zeal to do a soldier's duty1 ,misapprehended under wicked spell4 ,thou art not sure8 ,a witness should be sure2 ,more1 be he one denouncing deeds essayed ,worthy of death2 most1 if besides he add ,an office of the executioner4 ,thus the centurion to his soldier spoke1 ,who answered1 shuffling3 ,if my senses were ,rightly my own last night1 ,i told thee true2 ,but if ,i was usurped by sorcery ,to see and hear amiss--why1 who can say8 ,go find lord ,felix1 and1 due worship paid1 ,pray him come hither for a need that waits1 ,so ,julius made his soldier messenger4 ,grieving to trouble thee so far1 he next ,to ,felix1 soon appearing1 said3 ,i sent ,to ask thee of the ,jew in presence here4 ,knowest thou aught of him that might resolve ,a doubt how much he be to trust for true8 ,shimei shrank visibly1 while ,felix1 glad ,to vent his hatred of the pander1 spoke3 ,as many as his words1 so many lies2 ,trust him thou mayest--to never speak the truth4 ,wherewith the haughty freedman on his heel ,turned1 as disdaining to use tongue or ear ,further in such a cause1 and disappeared4 ,julius in silence looked a questioning pause ,at ,shimei1 who risked parrying answer1 thus3 ,lord ,felix is a disappointed man1 ,who1 if so soured1 is gently to be judged4 ,yet were it better he had stooped to speak ,by instance1 named occasion1 wherein ,i ,had seemed to fail matching my words with deeds4 ,i own ,i sought to serve him in his need2 ,and if1 forsooth1 when he his hold on power ,felt slipping from his hands1 ,i undertook ,freely1 in succor of his fainting mind1 ,somewhat beyond my strength to bring to pass1 ,in reconcilement of my countrymen ,against his sway unwontedly aggrieved-- ,why1 ,i am sorry2 but failed promises1 ,made in good faith1 should not be reckoned lies4 ,there seemed to the centurion measure enough ,of reason in what ,shimei so inferred1 ,if truly he inferred1 to leave the doubt ,still unresolved with which he was perplexed4 ,while the diversion of the incident ,with ,felix1 and of ,shimei's parrying1 passed1 ,the soldier1 so released to cast about ,at leisure1 thought of ,stephen standing up1 ,in that so ,sphinx-like silence1 startlingly1 ,beside him1 in the darkness on the deck1 ,at just the fatal point of his own poise ,for the returnless plunge in the abyss2 ,that ,hebrew youth would doubtless testify ,to ,shimei's damning2--to his own as well8 ,that were to think of6 ,what would ,stephen say8 ,must it not cloud his own clear truth and faith1 ,to have it told how he abode so long ,a hearkener to temptation2 how he took ,gold as for bribe1 and greedy seemed of more8 ,why had he not been first to speak of that8 ,wisest it looked to him not to invoke ,a witness of so much uncertain power ,to bring his own behavior into doubt4 ,and ,shimei showed such master of his part1 ,equal to shifting all appearances ,this way or that1 as best would serve himself1 ,promised so fair to make his side prevail1 ,were it not well to choose the chance with him8 ,the soldier fixed to stake on ,stephen naught4 ,shimei meantime had otherwise bethought ,himself of ,stephen--fearing1 yet with hope ,prevailing over fear3 hardly would he1 ,the soldier1 risk to call such witness in4 ,those twain diversely so with the same thought ,secretly busy1 the centurion-- ,whether by some unconscious sympathy ,his mind drawn into current following theirs1 ,like idle sea-drift in the wake of ships-- ,startled them both alike with his next word3 ,that ,hebrew lad1 ,stephen they call him1 go ,fetch him2 say1 ',come with me1' and no word more4 ,this to the soldier1 who soon brought the youth4 ,some kin thou to the prisoner ,paul1 ,i think8 ,said the centurion4 ,sister's son1 said he4 ,i had thee well reported of1 my lad2 ,belie not thy good fame1 but answer true1 ,julius to ,stephen spoke1 adjuring him4 ,knowest thou aught1 of thine own eye or ear1 ,how ,paul thy kinsman was bestead last night8 ,now ,stephen had not yet to ,paul declared ,aught of the strange disclosures of the night4 ,seeing here the plotter of that nameless deed ,demoniac1 in the part of one accused1 ,witnessed against with damning testimony1 ,the soldier's1 all-sufficing for his doom1 ,before a judge as ,roman sure to be ,swift in his sentence upon such a crime-- ,prompt in his secret mind ,stephen resolved1 ,as likeliest best to please his kinsman ,paul1 ,not to go further than compelled1 to add ,superfluous proof against the wretched man4 ,sincerely wretched now indeed once more ,shimei appeared2 effrontery of fraud ,and his vain confidence of hope forlorn ,abashed in him1 intolerably rebuked-- ,not more by this access of evidence 7,unlooked for1 since that muzzle to his mouth ,had so well served to hold the soldier mute ,from mention of the ,hebrew lad7--not more ,abashed thus and rebuked1 than by the mere ,aspect of the clear innocence and truth ,and virtue1 honor and high mind1 in fair ,and noble person there embodied seen ,in ,stephen beamy with his taintless youth4 ,was it some promise of retrieving yet ,possible for this soul1 so lost to good1 ,that1 broken from that festive confidence ,once his in the omnipotence of fraud ,to answer all his ends1 he thus should feel ,pain in the neighborhood of nobleness8 ,unconsciously so working1 like a wand ,wielded that cancels a magician's spell1 ,to shame back wretched ,shimei to himself1 ,nor ever guessing1 in his guileless mind1 ,of possible other posture to affairs ,than full exposure of the criminal ,already reached1 no need of word from him-- ,stephen to ,julius frugally replied3 ,paul's case was happy1 sir1 if this thou meanest1 ,how fared he in the hap which him befell2 ,then1 conscious of a look not satisfied ,in ,julius1 added3 ,if instead thou meanest ,what hap was threatened him but came to naught1 ,then ,i shall need to answer otherwise4 ,this ,i would learn1 said ,julius1 dost thou know1 ,of certain knowledge1 thine own eye or ear1 ,where ,paul was1 and what doing1 through the hours ,of last night's darkness8 ,how was he bestead8 ,that tell me1 if thou knowest1 naught else but that4 ,fact1 first2 thereafter1 fancy--if at all4 ,a little puzzled1 but withal relieved1 ,not to be witness against ,shimei1 ,it happened1 ,stephen said1 that as the dark ,drew on1 ,paul with his sister ,rachel talked1 ,they two apart2 but nigh at hand ,i sat1 ,with others1 on the deck4 ,as the night waxed1 ,with darkness from the still-withdrawing sun1 ,and then from clouds that blotted out the stars1 ,almost all went to covert one by one2 ,but ,paul abode1 and ,i abode with him4 ,yet were we from each other separate1 ,and ,paul perhaps knew not that ,i was nigh2 ,but ,i lay watching him and nursed my thoughts4 ,at first he paced1 as musing1 up and down1 ,then1 still alone1 and still as musing1 leaned1 ,in absent long oblivion of himself1 ,over the vessel's side--into the sea ,gazing1 like one who read a mystic book4 ,this and naught else he did1 until a dash ,of rain-drops shredded from the tempest broke ,his reverie2 and then both he and ,i1 ,meeting a moment but to say good-night1 ,housed us for the forgetfulness of sleep4 ,thou hast told me all8 ,communication none ,between ,paul and this soldier keeping him8 ,straitly of ,stephen the centurion asked1 ,with eye askance on ,shimei shrinking there4 ,with no one1 ,stephen answered1 spake ,paul word1 ,after that converse with his sister1 till ,i met him face to face and changed good night4 ,thou hadst some fancy other than thy fact1 ,said ,julius now to ,stephen1 some surmise ,as seemed concerning danger threatened ,paul-- ,but ,shimei dimmed so visibly to worse ,confession of dismay in countenance1 ,that ,julius checked the challenge on his lips1 ,and1 turning1 said to ,shimei3 ,need we more8 ,or art unmasked to thy contentment1 ,jew8 ,shall ,i bid hither ,paul1 forsooth1 and let ,thee face the uncle1 since the nephew so1 ,simply to see1 thy gullet fills with gall1 ,and twists thy wizened features all awry8 ,aye1 for meseems it were a happy thought1 ,go1 lad1 and call thy kinsman hither straight4 ,stay1 hast thou seen him since last night's farewell8 ,nay1 answered ,stephen4 ,well6 the ,roman said2 ,so tell him nothing now of what is here4 ,say only1 ',the centurion wishes thee'2 ,haste1 bring him4 ,stephen soon returned with ,paul1 ,who wondered1 knowing naught of all1 to see ,what the encounter was1 for him prepared4 ,not till now ever1 since the fateful time ,when1 buoyant with the sense of his reprieve ,won for a season from the contact loathed ,of ,shimei1 ,paul rode forth ,damascus-ward1 ,had they two in such mutual imminence met4 ,paul looked at ,shimei now1 not with regard ,that1 like a bayonet fixed1 thrust him aloof1 ,or icily transpierced him pitiless2 ,but in a gentle pathos of surprise1 ,with sorrow yearning to be sympathy-- ,reciprocal forgiveness interchanged ,between them1 and all difference reconciled3 ,a melting heaven of cloudless ,april blue ,ready to weep suffusion of warm tears1 ,the aspect seemed of ,paul on ,shimei turned4 ,good will1 such wealth1 expressed1 must needs good will ,responsive find1 or1 failing that1 create6 ,but ,shimei did not take the look benign ,of ,paul1 to feel its vernal power2 downcast ,his eyes he dropped and missed the virtue shed-- ,missed1 yet not so as not some gracious force1 ,ungraciously1 ill knowing1 to admit4 ,thou knowest this fellow-countryman of thine8 ,to the apostle speaking1 ,julius said4 ,i know him1 yea1 said ,paul4 ,and knowest perhaps1 ,said ,julius1 further sounding1 what the chance ,of mischief from him thou hast late escaped8 ,nay1 but not yet have ,i1 ,i trow1 ,paul said1 ,escaped the evil he fain would bring on me4 ,he hates me1 and1 if but he could1 he would ,quite rid me from the world2 that know ,i well4 ,but knowest thou1 the centurion pressed1 how he ,plotted last night to have thee overboard ,to wrestle1 swimming1 with the swirling sea8 ,nay1 ,paul said1 nay2 ,i knew not that4 ,he spoke ,without surprise couched in his tone2 far less1 ,horror or fear expressed in look or act2 ,no sidelong stab at ,shimei from his eye2 ,only some sadness1 with the patience1 dashed ,the weariness with which he spoke4 ,and yet-- ,and yet1 he added1 half as if he would ,extenuate what he could1 it is his way1 ,the natural way in which he works his will4 ,his will ,i well can understand1 though not1 ,not so1 his way4 ,from that ,i was averse ,ever1 but once ,i had myself his will4 ,thou canst not mean his will to get ,paul slain1 ,baffled1 the ,roman said4 ,nay1 but his will ,to persecute and utterly to destroy1 ,said ,paul1 the ,name1 and all that own the ,name1 ,of my ,lord ,jesus ,christ from off the earth4 ,at that ,name1 thus with loyal love confessed1 ,the hoarded hatred1 deep in ,shimei's heart1 ,toward ,jesus1 which so long had fed and fired ,the embers of the hatred his for ,paul1 ,stirred angrily2 it almost overcame ,the cringing craven personal fear in him4 ,though he indeed spoke not1 uttered no sound1 ,there passed upon his visage and his port ,a change1 from abject while malign1 to look ,malign more1 and less abject1 fierce and fell4 ,it was a strange transfiguration wrought1 ,an horrible redemption thus achieved-- ,from what before one only could despise ,to what one now1 forsooth1 might reprobate6 ,the quite-collapsed late liar and poltroon ,rallied to a resistant attitude1 ,which stiffened and grew hard like adamant1 ,while further ,julius thus his wiles exposed3 ,the 'way' of this thy fellow-countryman1 ,o ,paul1 thou hast yet1 ,i judge1 in full to learn4 ,when1 by the soldier whom he sought to bribe ,for thy destruction1 of his crime accused ,to me1 how1 thinkest thou1 he would purge himself8 ,why1 by persuading me that ,paul1 instead1 ,had himself bought his keeper to forswear ,against him1 ,shimei1 such foul plot to slay4 ,hold ,i not well thou hadst something still to learn ,of the unsounded depths his 'way' seeks out8 ,julius said this with look on ,shimei fixed1 ,full of the scorn he felt1 each moment more4 ,like the skilled slinger toying with his stone ,swung round and round in air1 full length of sway1 ,through circles viewless swift1 but in its pouch ,uneasy1 at his leisure still delayed ,for surer aim and fiercer flight at last1 ,and that1 the while1 the wielder may prolong ,both his delight of vengeance tasted so1 ,and his foe's fear accenting his delight2 ,thus ,julius1 dallying1 teased to wrath his scorn1 ,more threatening as in luxury of reserve ,suspended from the outbreak yet to fall4 ,the while the scornful ,roman's wroth regard ,fixed as if caustic fangs upon the ,jew1 ,the ,jew1 with stoic endurance1 steeled himself ,to take it without blenching4 ,full well felt ,through all his members was that branding look2 ,though his eyes still were downward bent1 as when ,he dropped them to refuse ,paul's sweet good will4 ,but suddenly now1 he one first furtive glance ,lifting1 as if unwillingly1 to ,paul1 ,shimei takes on a violent change reverse4 ,a wave of abjectness swept over him ,that drenched1 that drowned1 his evil hardihood ,and wrecked him to a ruin of himself4 ,julius who saw this change had also seen ,shimei's stolen glance at ,paul2 he himself now ,turned toward the apostle with inquiring eye4 ,what he saw seized him and usurped his mind-- ,his passion with a mightier passion quelled1 ,or to another1 higher1 key transposed3 ,the wrathful scorn that had toward ,shimei blazed ,became a rapt admiring awe of ,paul4 ,for there ,paul stood1 the meek and lowly mien1 ,the sadness and the patience1 not laid by1 ,but an unconscious air of majesty ,enduing him like a clear transpicuous veil1 ,self-luminous so with cleansed indignant zeal ,for ,god and truth and righteousness outraged1 ,that he was fair and fearful to behold4 ,god had made him a ,sinai round whose top ,a silent thunder boomed and lightnings played4 ,white holiness burned on his brow1 a flame ,the like whereof the ,roman never saw ,glorifying and making terrible1 ,beyond all fabled gods1 the front of man4 ,the exceeding instance of this spectacle ,it was1 filling the place as if with beams1 ,not of the day1 but stronger than the day1 ,that had perforce drawn ,shimei's eyes to see-- ,a moment1 and no more4 ,as seared with light ,fiercer than they could bear1 again they fell4 ,then all the man with saving terror shook ,to hear ,paul speak--in tones wherein no ire1 ,as for himself1 entered1 to ease the weight ,with which the might of truth omnipotent ,pressed on its victim like the hand of ,god3 ,full of all subtlety and mischief6 ,thou ,child of the devil1 as doer of his deeds6 ,accursd1 if thou hadst but plotted death ,against me1 death however horrible1 ,that ,i had found a light thing to forgive4 ,but to swear me suborner like thyself ,of perjury--,but the denouncer marked ,how1 under his denouncement1 ,shimei quailed3 ,he in mid launch the fulmination stayed4 ,his adversary victim's broken plight ,disarmed him1 and a sad vicarious sense ,of what awaited such as ,shimei ,hereafter1 penetrated to his heart4 ,as shamed from his indignant passion1 ,paul ,instantly melted to a mood of tears4 ,this ,shimei less could bear than he had borne ,those terrors of the ,lord aflame in ,paul4 ,the old man shaken with so many sharp ,vicissitudes of feeling1 sharp and swift3-- ,hope from despair1 despair again from hope2 ,then fresh hope from the ashes of despair2 ,that costly hardening of the heart with hate1 ,and steeling1 to resistance1 of the will2 ,next1 a soul-cleaving anguish of remorse1 ,new to him1 mingled with forebodings new1 ,menaces beckoning from the world to come2 ,these1 with the unimagined tenderness ,that now reached out and touched him in ,paul's tears-- ,the old man1 plied and exercised thus1 broke ,abruptly from the habit of a life1 ,utterly broke1 and suddenly was no more1 ,at least for one sweet moment of release1 ,the hard1 the false1 the bitter1 the malign ,shimei of old--changed to a little child6 ,in both his quivering hands his face he hid1 ,and1 all his strength consumed to scarcely stand1 ,wept1 with convulsion poured from head to foot1 ,but made no other sign1 to this from ,paul3 ,as ,i forgive thee1 lo1 forgive thou me1 ,shimei1 my brother6 ,and ,christ us both forgive6 ,the ,roman wondering saw these things and heard1 ,nor moved in speech or gesture1 touched with awe4 ,but when now all was acted so1 and seemed ,there nothing was to follow more1 he turned1 ,and1 not ungently1 though with firm command1 ,said to the soldier3 ,lead him hence away ,to keeping2 make his manacles secure4 ,thou wilt not1 ,i suppose1 a second time1 ,try ear or tongue in parley--never wise4 ,thou hast lost somewhat in this adventure2 see ,thou win it back with double heed henceforth4 ,so ,shimei went remanded to his doom1 ,with ,paul and ,stephen pitying witnesses4 ,,book ,,ix4 ,,paul ,,and ,,young ,,stephen4 ,in sequel of the tragic crime and doom that had just been witnessed by him in the case of ,shimei1 young ,stephen is drawn to resume with his kinsman ,paul the topic of the imprecatory psalms1 which they had previously discussed on their night ride from ,jerusalem toward ,csarea4 ,paul gently lets his nephew unbosom all his heart1 and1 point by point1 meets the young man's difficulties with senior counsel and instruction4 ,,paul ,,and ,,young ,,stephen4 ,the brilliant weather1 with the sparkling sea ,blue under the blue heaven above it bowed1 ,there the great sun1 his solitary state ,making his own pomp as it moved along ,in that imperial progress through the skies1 ,the blithe wind blowing in the singing sails1 ,and the gay answer of the bounding bark1 ,on either hand bright glimpses of the shore-- ,all these things to enliven were not enough ,for that day's need to ,paul and those with him3 ,they could not rally to their customed cheer1 ,serious1 not sad1 although light-hearted never4 ,the deed of ,shimei and scarce less his doom ,still damped their spirits1 so strung to sympathy1 ,till sunny day wore on to starry night4 ,then1 ,paul and ,stephen by themselves apart ,resting1 the younger to the elder said3 ,much1 ,o mine uncle1 have ,i pondered1 since1 ,the deep things that ,i heard from thee1 that night1 ,already now so many months ago1 ,by thy side riding1 thou by ,lysias sent 7,safeguarded by his ,romans from the ,jews67 ,to wear out thy duress at ,csarea4 ,thou wert then as now escaped from ,shimei's snare6 ,we spake1 thou wilt remember1 of those psalms ,which breathe1 or seem to breathe1 such breath of hate4 ,i had recited one aloud to thee-- ,to myself rather1 bold1 for thee to hear-- ,vent to the feeling fierce that in my breast ,boiled into tempest against ,shimei4 ,thou chidedst me with a most sweet rebuke ,that drew the tumor all1 out of my heart2 ,thou taughtst me then that the good ,spirit of ,god1 ,who breathed the inspiration into men ,to utter such dire words1 seeming of hate1 ,hated not any as ,i to hate had dared4 ,i understood thee that ,god only so ,revealed in forms of vivid human speech ,the implacable resentment--but ,i pause1 ,pause startled at the word ,i use2 ,i would1 ,could ,i1 find other than such words as these1 ',resentment1' 'indignation1' 'hatred1' 'wrath1' ,to speak my thought of holy ,god aflame ,with infinite displacency at sin-- ,once more6 ,another word ,i fain would shun6 ,for by some tether that ,i cannot break1 ,bound1 ,i revolve in the same circle still4 ,as if his speech were half soliloquy1 ,the youth let lapse his musing into mute1 ,which not with word or sign would ,paul invade4 ,almost with admiration1 with such joy ,of hope for ,stephen1 ,paul remarked in him ,the noble gains of knowledge he had made-- ,wisdom say rather out of knowledge won-- ,in those two years at ,csarea spent2 ,years for the youth so rich in fruitful chance ,of converse with his elders1 and of thought ,which in that quick young mind1 for brooding apt ,no less than apt for action1 brought to full ,sweet ripeness all that he from other learned1 ,and touched it with a quality his own4 ,paul could not but in measure feel himself ,given back to him reflected in the words ,that he just now had heard from ,stephen's lips2 ,yet he therein felt too a surge of youth ,and youth's unrest and eagerness and strife ,and dauntless heart to assay the impossible ,which were all ,stephen's4 ,and he held his peace4 ,presently ,stephen took up voice again3 ,almost ,i thus resolve myself one doubt1 ,one question1 that ,i thought to bring to thee4 ,god is not altogether such1 ,i know1 ,as we are2 yet are we too somewhat such ,as ,he1 for in ,god's image were we made4 ,and we perforce must know ,god1 if at all1 ,then by ourselves as patterned after ,him4 ,so ,i suppose our best similitude ,for what ,god feels--but 'feeling1' also that6-- ,how fast do these anthropomorphic walls ,enclose us still in all our thought of ,god6-- ',feeling' is but a parable flung forth ,by us1 bridge-builders on the hither side1 ,to tremble out a little way toward ,god1 ,then flutter helpless down in the abyss1 ,the impassable abyss1 of difference ,between created and ,creator1 us ,and ,him1 the finite and the ,infinite6 ,forgive me1 but ,i lose my way in words6 ,and again ,stephen broke his utterance off1 ,faltering2 like one who fording a full stream ,now in midcurrent finds his foothold fail1 ,and cannot in such deepened waters walk4 ,this time ,paul reached the struggling youth a hand ,with3 ,thou hast not ill achieved in thine essay ,to utter what is nigh unutterable4 ,but1 ,stephen1 better bridge than any form ,of fancy1 figure or similitude1 ,to human sense or reason possible ,and capable of frame in human speech1 ,for spanning the great gulf immeasurable1 ,unfathomable1 nay1 inconceivable1 7,gulf1 otherwise than so1 impassable1 ,yet so1 securely closed forevermore67 ,the awful gulf of being and of thought1 ,much more1 of moral difference1 since our fall1 ,that parts our kind from holy ,god ,most ,high-- ,yea1 better bridge than any word of ours ,aspiring upward from beneath to ,god1 ,is that ,eternal ,word of ,god ,himself ,to us1 down-reaching hither from above1 ,who1 being ,god with ,god1 was ,man with man1 ,and ,who1 returning thither whence ,he came1 ,carried our nature with ,him into heaven1 ,and to the ,ever-living joined us one4 ,but rightly thou wert saying1 my ,stephen1 that we ,best can approach to put in speech of man ,the ineffable regard of ,god toward sin1 ,if we impute to ,him a spurning such ,as we feel when we hate or loathe or scorn1 ,and wish to wreak in punishment our wrath4 ,but we must purge ourselves of self-regard1 ,or we are sinful in abhorring sin2 ,and we attaint ,god with gross attribute ,imputed from what we through fall became4 ,an horrible profaneness1 sure1 it were1 ,the image first of ,god in us to foul1 ,and then that foulness back on ,god asperse1 ,making ,him hate with wicked human hate6 ,the wide impersonal purport of ,paul's words1 ,not meant1 he knew1 in hidden hint to him1 ,still1 ,stephen with his wise docile spirit took ,home to himself1 and fell some moments mute1 ,considering2 then afresh his mind exposed3 ,i feel1 ,o kinsman most revered1 how bold1 ,how froward1 how perverse1 it were in me1 ,first to lay hold on holy words of ,god ,to use them1 as ,i used that psalm that night1 ,profanely for a vehicle of hate2 ,and then1 convicted of my fault therein1 ,turn round and blame the very words ,i used1 ,or seem to blame them1 as unmeet from ,god4 ,yet ,i experience an obscure distress-- ,is it of mind or heart8 ,i scarce know which-- ,a sense of contradiction unresolved1 ,when1 in the spirit of all-loving love1 ,such as sometimes ,i seem to catch from thee1 ,i read or ponder those terrific psalms4 ,thou art tempted then perhaps1 gently said ,paul1 ,yet with some gentle irony implied1 ,to doff the pupil's lowly attitude ,in which thou hadst learned so much2 as if indeed ,thou hadst learned enough to be a teacher now1 ,and even a teacher to thy ,teacher1 ,god8 ,beware1 my son1 of these delusive thoughts2 ,love also has its specious counterfeits-- ,whence that deep word of the apostle ,john1 ,so frequent on his lips1 his touchstone word-- ,more needed1 as1 to seeming1 needed not-- ,to make us sure1 when we suppose we love1 ,whether we love in truth3 ',herein we know ,that we ,god's children love1 when we love ,god1 ,and ,his commandments do4' ,for this is love ,indeed of ,god1 to do ,his holy will6 ,a childlike humble spirit1 the spirit of love1 ,contented to believe and to obey6 ,the wiser that she seeks not to be wise1 ,she wins her wisdom by obedience4 ,does thy love puff thee up to challenge ,god ,whether ,he be consistent with ,himself8 ,suspect 'all-loving love' which moves to that6 ,love puffs not up--right love1 love which is awe 7,as ever love inbreathed from ,jesus is7-- ,to any pride of wisdom questioning ,god4 ,some specious counterfeit it is of love1 ,not love herself--who grows by meekness wise ,to meekness more1 and more obedient faith-- ,not love1 nay1 ,stephen1 but other spirit than love 7,self-pity1 self-indulgence1 self-regard1 ,some spirit fixing for the center self71 ,that sits in judgment on the ways of ,god ,to find ,him sometimes wise or sometimes not4 ,god was as wise when ,he inspired those psalms ,as when in ,christ he bade us ever love1 ,love even our enemies and do them good4 ,submit thyself to ,god1 my ,stephen1 and be ,humble2 for ,god resists the proud1 but gives ,grace to the humble still and grace for grace-- ,grace given already1 ground for added grace4 ,grow then in grace thus1 and be meekly wise4 ,i have spoken divining what thy meaning was1 ,perhaps amiss--and ,paul refrained from more4 ,but ,stephen answered3 ,if such was my thought1 ,at least ,i did not know it to be such1 ,as thou hast thus divined it now for me4 ,thither perhaps it tended--but that goal1 ,shown in this light from thee1 though far1 ,i shun2 ,i would not be more wise than ,god1 for ,god4 ,but is there then no contrariety ,at all1 no spirit discrepant1 between ,the frightful fulminations of those psalms ,and the forgiving love of our ,lord ,christ8 ,none1 ,stephen1 said ,paul1 for none did ,jesus know1 ,who knew those psalms and never protest made ,against them1 never softened their austere1 ,their angry1 aspect1 never glozed their sense1 ,never one least slant syllable let slip1 ,hint as that ,he would not have spoken so1 ,never with pregnant silence passed them by4 ,nay1 of those psalms one of the fiercest1 ,he-- ,and this1 then when ,his baptism into death1 ,his offering of ,himself for sin1 was nigh1 ,those ,feet already in the crimson flood6-- ,most meek and lowly suffering ,lamb of ,god1 ,took to ,himself to make it serve ,his need ,in uttering the just horror of ,his soul ,at such hate wreaked on ,him without a cause4 ',pour out ,thine indignation on them1 ,lord1 ,and let the fierceness of ,thy wrath smite them6 ,to their iniquity iniquity ,add ,thou'--such curse invokes this dreadful psalm-- ',let them be blotted from the book of life'6 ,from close beside these burning sentences1 ,these drops of ,sodom-and-,gomorrah rain1 ,out of the self-same psalm with them1 our ,lord1 ,now nigh to suffer 7saying to ,his own ,he as in holy of holies with them shrined1 ,more heavenly things than ever even ,himself ,till then had spoken7 drew those words--sad words1 ,stern words6--',they hated ,me without a cause4' ,love shrank not1 nay1 in ,him1 from holy hate6 ,his spirit and the spirit of those psalms ,ever with one another dwelt at peace2 ,more than at peace1 with one another one ,were they1 the selfsame spirit both2 as needs ,was1 since the ,spirit of all psalms was ,he4 ,even thus1 ,i have not to the full expressed ,the will1 with power1 that in ,christ ,jesus wrought ,to fulmine indignation against sin4 ,the psalms1 those fiercest and most branding1 fail ,to match the fury of the ,lamb of ,god ,poured out in words of woe on wickedness1 ,his own words1 burning to the lowest hell-- ,enraged eruption from the heart of love6 ,most dreadful of things dreadful that6 ,a fire1 ,my ,stephen1 which1 as loth to kindle1 so1 ,once kindled1 then will burn the deepest down6 ,woe the most hopeless of surcease or change-- ,mercy herself to malediction moved1 ,love forced to speak in final words of hate6 ,an energy of earnest in ,paul's voice1 ,a tender earnest1 full of love and fear1 ,fear without dread1 serene vicarious fear 7,yet faithful sympathy with ,god expressed7 ,the solemn somber of a lighted look ,in him1 reflected as from some unseen ,region where light was more than luminous1 ,appalling1 like the splendor of a cloud ,whence deep the thunder now begins to break-- ,these1 with his words themselves infusing awe1 ,made ,stephen feel his heart in him stand still4 ,both for meet reverence toward the reverend man ,who spake these things1 and likewise to assure ,himself that he in nothing failed the full ,sense and effect of all that he had heard1 ,stephen his hush awe-struck1 of thought1 prolonged4 ,then1 partly from a certain manliness ,innate in him1 inalienably his1 ,which1 while of noble and ennobling awe ,it made his spirit but more capable1 ,yet kept him ever conscious of his worth1 ,and would not suffer that1 with any thought ,quick in him and still seeming to him true ,or worthy to be questioned for its truth1 ,he should1 howso abashed1 abandon it-- ,partly self-stayed so in a constant mind1 ,but more1 supported by his perfect trust ,well-grounded in his kinsman's gentleness ,and tact of understanding exquisite1 ,stephen returned to press his quest once more3 ,i must not seem insistent overmuch1 ,o thou my kinsman and my master dear1 ,to whom indeed ,i hearken as to one ,divinely guided to be guide to men2 ,but a desire to know not yet allayed1 ,perhaps ,i ought to own1 some haunting doubt1 ,prompts me to ask one question more of thee4 ,i know the psalms whereof we speak were meant1 ,as were their fellow psalms1 each1 not to breathe ,the individual feeling of one soul ,whether himself the writer or whoso ,might take it for his own1 but to be used ,by the great congregation joining voice ,in symphony or in antiphony ,of choral worship1 with stringed instruments ,adding their help1 and instruments of wind3 ,so1 most unmeet it were if private grudge ,of any whomsoever1 high or low1 ,should mix its base alloy with the fine gold ,of prayer and praise stored in our holy psalms ,for pure oblation from all holy hearts ,to ,him1 the ,ever-living ,holy ,god4 ,the wicked and the enemy therein ,accursd so from good to every bane ,and ill here and hereafter following them ,and hunting down their issue to the end ,of endless generations of their like-- ,these1 ,i can understand1 were public foes1 ,not private1 adversary heathen tribes ,that hated us because they hated ,god ,who chose us for ,his own peculiar race1 ,and swayed us weapon in ,his dread right hand ,to execute ,his judgment on ,his foes1 ,his foes1 not ours1 or only ours as ,his-- ',them that hate ,thee do not ,i hate1 ,o ,god8' ,the righteous execration bursting forth1 ,an outcry irrepressible of zeal1 ,through all the cycle of those fearful psalms1 ,not from a heart of virulence toward men1 ,but from a love1 consuming self1 for ,god4 ,such1 ,i can understand1 the purport was ,wherein ,himself1 the ,holy ,ghost of ,god1 ,inspired those psalms and willed them to be sung4 ,but1 ,o my master1 tell me1 did not yet ,some too importunate spirit not thus pure1 ,of outright sheer malevolence some trace1 ,escape of private malice uncontrolled1 ,hatred toward man that was not love for ,god1 ,on his part who was chosen ,god's oracle ,to such high end and hard1 enter the strain ,he chanted1 here or there1 to jar the tune ,and of his music make a dissonance8 ,stephen1 as one who had with resolute ,exertion of an overcoming will ,discharged his heart with speech1 let come what might1 ,rested2 the tension of his purpose still ,persisting to refuse himself recoil4 ,feeling his nephew's girded attitude1 ,nowise resistant1 though recessive not1 ,braced to keep staunch his standing where he stood1 ,paul would not overbear it with sheer strength2 ,choosing1 with just insinuation wise1 ,to ease it through concession yielded him4 ,he said3 ,my ,stephen has pondered deep these things1 ,and to result of truth well worth his pains4 ,thou hast profited1 my son1 perhaps beyond ,thine own thought of thy profiting1 in sweet ,acquist of wisdom from the mind of ,christ4 ,fair change1 change fair and great1 in thee since when ,thou cursedst ,shimei in that bitter psalm6-- ,bitter from thee who saidst it bitterly4 ,behold1 thou art fain1 forsooth1 to find those words1 ,those same words now which then thou likedst well ,rolling them under thy tongue a morsel sweet1 ,almost too human for at all divine4 ,was there not in them1 this thou askest me1 ,expression intermixed of wicked hate1 ,his whose the occasion was to write the psalm8 ,the turns and phrases of the speech wherein ,the psalmist here or there breathes out his soul ,in malediction1 have such force to thee1 ,importing that his spirit let escape ,a passion of his own not purified ,amid the pressure and the stress of zeal ,inspired from ,god against unrighteousness4 ,well1 ,stephen1 the entrusted word of ,god ,to men is ours through men and1 men being such1 ,why1 needs we have the priceless treasure stored1 ,stored and conveyed1 in vessels framed of clay4 ,no perfect men are found1 were ever found3 ,god's inspiration does not change men such4 ,his wisdom is to make of men unwise1 ,of men1 too1 fallen far short of holiness1 ,imperfect organs of ,his perfect will4 ,adhesion hence of imperfection1 man's1 ,fast to the letter of the ,scripture clings2 ,but it makes part of ,his perfection1 ,god's1 ,who knows us1 and from ,his celestial height ,benignly earthward deigning condescends4 ,in terms of our imperfect1 flawed with sin ,even1 the ,divine inworking wisdom loves ,to teach us noble lessons of ,himself1 ,ennobling us to ever nobler views ,of what ,he is1 so shadowed forth to us4 ',sin1' that word 'sin1' so weighted as we know ,with sense1 beyond communication deep1 ,of evil1 of wrong1 of outrage1 of offence ,toward ,god1 and toward ourselves of injury ,irreparable and growing ever great ,and greater to immortal suicide ,wreaked with incredible madness on the soul-- ,what is that word in the light shallow speech ,of pagan ,greek8 ,what but a word to mean1 ,as if of purpose to make naught the blame1 ,simply the casual missing of a mark8 ,venial1 forsooth1 merely an aim not hit-- ,the aim right1 but the arrow flying wide6 ,into such matrix1 shallower as would seem ,than could be made capacious of such sense1 ,god must devise to pour ,his thought of sin6 ,but how the thought has deepened since its mould1 ,still vain to match the sinfulness of sin6 ,humbleness--what a virtue1 what a grace ,say rather1 yet in all the ,greek no word ,to name it1 till ,god's wisdom rectified ,a word that erst imported what was base1 ,mean1 sordid1 dastard1 unuplifted1 vile ,in spirit1 pusillanimous1 to name ,the lowly temper1 best beloved in man ,by ,god1 the heavenly temper of ,his ,son6 ,the thought at last is master of its mould1 ,though mould is needful for the plastic thought4 ,in our imagination of ,the ,true1 ,we climb as by a ladder1 round by round1 ,slowly toward ,him1 the ,inaccessible1 ,who dwells in a seclusion and remove ,of glory unapproachable1 and light ,that makes a blinding darkness round ,his throne4 ,he stoops and finds and touches us abased ,so far beneath ,him where we grovelling lie2 ,nay1 ,he lays hold of us and lifts us up2 ,with cords1 so it is written1 of a man ,he draws us1 blessd ,god6--with bands of love1 ,of love1 the mightiest of ,his heavenly powers6 ,o1 the depth fathomless1 the starry height1 ,the breadth1 the length immeasurably large1 ,both of the wisdom and the knowledge1 ,god's6 ,because1 forsooth1 we have some few steps climbed1 ,shall we1 proud1 spurn from underneath our feet ,the ladder that uplifted us so far1 ,that might have raised us yet the full ascent8 ,that ladder rests on earth to reach to heaven3 ,let us go on forever climbing higher1 ,but not forget the dark hole of the pit ,out of which we were digged1 nor1 more1 contemn ,the way of wisdom thither reaching down ,and thence aspiring to the topmost heaven2 ,whereby our race may 7so we stumble not ,through pride1 or like ,jeshurun waxen fat ,kick7 reascend at length to whence we fell-- ,nay1 higher1 and far above all height the highest1 ,to ,him1 with ,him1 exalted to ,his right1 ,to ,him1 with ,him1 in ,him1 ,lord ,christ1 ,who rose ,for us in mighty triumph from ,his grave1 ,then reascended where ,he was before1 ,ere the world was1 ,god with ,his ,father ,god1 ,but still for us2 and1 still for us1 sat down ,forever1 in ,his ,filial ,godhead ,man1 ,assessor with ,his ,father on ,his throne1 ,inheriting the ,name o'er every name ,ascendant1 ,king of kings and ,lord of lords1 ,and us assuming with ,himself to reign6 ,amen6 ,and hallelujah6 ,and amen6 ,as one might watch an eagle in his flight ,that soared to viewless in the blinding sun2 ,as one might hearken while from higher and higher ,a lark poured back his singing on the ground1 ,so ,stephen gazed1 listening1 with ecstatic mind4 ,transported with delight ,i hear thee speak ,thus1 ,o my reverend master1 for with awe1 ,which is delight1 the deepest that ,i know-- ,thus at length ,stephen spoke1 easing his mind ,a little1 with its fulness overfraught4 ,doxology outbreaking from thy lips ,becomes them so6 ,the rapture of thy praise ,is as the waving of a mighty wing ,beside me that is able to upbear ,me also thither whither it will soar4 ,i am caught in its motion and ,i mount ,unmeasured heights as to the heaven of heavens4 ,let me join voice with thee and say1 ',amen6' ,not least ,i love when least ,i understand ,often thy high discourse4 ,eluding me ,it leads me yet and tempts me after thee1 ,tempts and enables1 and1 above myself1 ,i find myself equalled to the impossible6 ,but then when afterward ,i sink returned ,to what ,i was--no longer wing not mine ,to lift me with its great auxiliar sweep ,upward--,i grope and stumble on the ground4 ,bear with me that ,i need to ask such things1 ,but tell me yet1 ,o thou who knowest1 tell me1 ,am ,i then right1 and is it1 as thou seemedst ,to say but saidst not1 veering from the mark ,when now almost upon it1 so ,i thought1 ,who waited watching--did the psalmist old ,commingle sometimes an alloy of base ,unpurified affection with his clear ,all-holy inspiration breathed from ,god1 ,lading his language with a sense unmeet1 ,personal spite1 his own1 for ,god's pure ire8 ,forgive me that ,i need to ask such things4 ,thou dost not need to ask such things1 my son1 ,paul with a grave severity replied4 ,to ask them is to ask me that ,i judge ,a fellow-servant4 ,what am ,i to judge ,the servant of another1 ,i who am ,servant myself with him of the same ,lord8 ,i will not judge my neighbor2 nay1 myself1 ,mine own self even1 ,i judge not2 ,one is ,judge1 ,he who the ,master is1 not ,i that serve4 ,if so be1 the inspired1 not sanctified1 ,mere man1 entrusted with the word of ,god-- ,our human fellow in infirmity1 ,remember1 of like passions with ourselves-- ,indeed in those old days wherein he wrote1 ,his enemies being the enemies of the ,lord1 ,and speaking he as voice at once of ,god ,and of ,god's chosen1 ,his ministers to destroy ,those wicked--if so be such man1 so placed1 ,half conscious1 half unconscious1 oracle ,of utterance not his own1 did in some part ,that utterance make his own1 profaning it1 ,to be his vehicle for sense not meant ,by the august ,supreme ,inspiring ,will-- ,whether in truth he did1 be ,god the judge1 ,not thou1 my son1 nor ,i1 but if he did-- ,why1 ,stephen1 then that psalmist--with more plea ,than thou for lenient judgment on the sin1 ,thine the full light1 and only twilight his1 ,with ,christ our ,sun unrisen--the selfsame fault ,as thou1 committed4 ,be both thou and he ,forgiven of ,him with ,whom forgiveness is-- ,with ,whom alone1 that so ,he may be feared6 ,abashed1 rebuked1 the youth in silence stood1 ,musing2 but what he mused divining1 ,paul1 ,with gently reassuring speech resumed1 ,soon to the things unspoken in the heart ,of ,stephen spoke and said3 ,abidest still ,unsatisfied that anything from ,god1 ,though even through man1 should less than perfect be1 ,or anywise other than incapable1 ,than utterly intolerant1 of abuse ,to purposes profane8 ,consider this-- ,and lay thy hand upon thy mouth1 nay1 put ,thou mouth into the dust1 before the ,lord-- ,that ,god ,most ,high hath willed it thus to be1 ,that thus ,christ found it and pronounced it good4 ,who are we1 ,stephen1 to be more wise than ,god1 ,who1 to be holier than ,his ,holy ,son8 ,amen6 ,amen6 ,i needs must say1 ,amen6 ,in anguish of bewilderment the youth ,cried out1 almost with sobs of passionate ,submission1 from rebellion passionate ,hardly to be distinguished2 yea1 to ,god ,from man1 ever amen1 only amen1 ,no other answer possible to ,him6-- ,who is the potter1 in ,whose hands the clay ,are we1 helpless and choiceless1 to be formed ,and fashioned into vessels at ,his will6 ,helpless1 yea1 ,stephen1 ,paul said1 but choiceness not2 ,we choose1 nay1 even1 we cannot choose but choose-- ,the choice our freedom1 our necessity3 ,free how to choose1 we are to choose compelled4 ,we choose with ,god1 or else against ,him choose4 ,which wilt thou1 ,stephen8 ,thou6 ,with ,him or against8 ,a struggle of submission shuddered down ,to quiet in the bosom of the youth-- ,strange contrast to the unperturbed repose1 ,with rapture1 of obedience1 that meantime1 ,and ever1 safe within the heart of ,paul ,breathed as might breathe an infant folded fast ,to slumber in its mother's cradling arms6 ,so had ,paul learned to let the peace of ,christ ,rule in his heart1 a fixed perpetual calm1 ,like the deep sleep of ocean at his core ,of waters underneath the planes of storm4 ,and ,stephen answered3 ,oh1 with ,god1 with ,god6 ,and blessd be ,his name that thus ,i choose6 ,yea1 verily1 ,paul said1 for ,he sole it is ,who worketh in us1 both to will and work ,for the good pleasure of ,his holy will4 ,as thou this fashion of obedience ,obediently acceptest at ,his gift1 ,so growest thou faithful mirror to reflect ,clear to thyself1 and just1 the thought of ,god4 ,thus thou mayst hope to learn somewhat of true1 ,of high and deep and broad1 concerning ,him1 ,him and ,his ways inscrutable with us-- ,of thy self emptied1 for more room to be ,from ,god henceforth with all ,his fulness filled6 ,this at least learn thou now1 how greatly wise ,was ,god1 by that which was in us the lowest ,to take us and uplift us higher and higher ,until those very passions1 hate and wrath1 ,which erst seemed right to us1 as they were dear1 ,become1 to our changed eyes--eyes1 though thus changed1 ,nay1 as thus changed1 sore tempted to be proud-- ,become forsooth unworthy symbols even ,to shadow ,god's displeasure against sin4 ,to generation generation linked ,in living long succession from the first1 ,to nation nation joined1 one fellowship ,of man1 through clime and clime1 from sea to sea-- ,thus has by slow degrees our human kind ,been brought from what we were to what we are4 ,thus and no otherwise the chosen race ,was fitted to provide a welcoming home1 ,such welcoming home6 on earth for ,him from heaven-- ,the only people of all peoples we ,among whom ,god could be ,immanuel ,and be in any measure understood1 ,confounded not as of their idol tribes4 ,and we--we did not understand ,him so ,but that we hissed ,him to be crucified6 ,so little were we ready1 and even at last1 ,for the sun shining in ,his proper strength6 ,after slow-brightening twilight ages long ,to fit our blinking vision for the day1 ,the glorious sun arising blinded us ,and maddened6 ,we smote at him in his sphere1 ,loving our darkness rather than that light6 ,therewith1 as for the moment lapsed and lost ,in backward contemplation1 with amaze ,and shame and grief and joy and love and awe ,and thanks commingling in one surge of thought ,at what he thus in sudden transport saw1 ,paul into silence passed1 which his rapt look ,made vocal and more eloquent than voice4 ,this ,stephen reverenced1 but at last he said3 ,o thou my teacher in the things of ,god1 ,that riddle of wisdom in divine decree ,whereof thou spakest1 the linking in one chain ,together1 one fast bond and consequence1 ,of all the generations of mankind ,and all their races for a common lot ,of evil or good1 yet speak1 ,i pray1 thereof1 ,to make me understand it if ,i may4 ,why should ,jehovah on the children wreak ,the wages of the fathers' wickedness8 ,shall not the ,judge of all the earth do right8 ,yea1 doubtless1 yea2 but that--how is that right8 ,his way is in the sea1 said ,paul1 ,his path ,in the great waters6 ,would we follow ,him1 ,his footsteps are not known6 ,blessd be ,god6 ,amen6 ,amen6 ,forevermore amen6 ,as one who bound himself with sacrament1 ,assenting without interrupting said ,stephen1 and ,paul went on3 ,yet this note thou3 ,it is not on the children1 such by blood1 ,that ,god will visit the iniquity ,of fathers3 the children must be such in choice ,as well1 in spirit1 must be the fathers' like-- ,and there another mystery6 7for deep ,sinks endless under deep1 to who would sound ,the bottomless abyss of ,god's decree7-- ,the children ever1 prave and prone1 incline ,to follow where the fathers lead the way2 ,the children1 yea1 must do the fathers' deeds1 ,then only share the fathers' punishment4 ,this1 by that prophet mouth1 ,ezekiel1 ,god ,taught with expostulation and appeal ,pathetically eloquent of love ,with longing in our ,heavenly ,father's heart ,that not one human creature of ,his hand ,be lost1 but all1 but all1 turn and be saved4 ,nay1 even from ,sinai's touched and smoking top ,was the same sense of grace to men revealed4 ,for what said that commandment threatening wrath ,divine1 in sequel of ancestral sin1 ,to light on generations yet to be8 ,said it not1 ',on the children8' ,yea1 but heed1 ,it hasted to supply in pregnant words ,description of the children thus accursed3 ',on the third generation and the fourth ,of them that hate ,jehovah'--wicked seed ,of wicked sires1 and therefore with them well ,deserving to partake one punishment4 ,and now consider what stands written next4 ,deterrent menace done1 to fend from sin1 ,allurement then1 how large6 to righteousness4 ,if first the warning filled a mighty bound1 ,all bound the grace succeeding overflowed4 ,o1 limitless outpouring from a full1 ,an overfull1 an aching1 heart of love ,in ,god our ,father6 ,mercy to be shown1 ,not to two generations or to three1 ,but to a thousand generations1 drawn1 ,a bright succession1 to unending date1 ,of them--that 'fear and worship'8 nay--that love ,god for their ,father and ,his will observe6 ,but1 ,stephen1 enough for now of such discourse4 ,my mind is helpless absent while we talk1 ,my heart being heavy with desire and prayer ,and groanings from the ,spirit unutterable ,for ,shimei in his noisome dungeon pent4 ,i have sung praises in worse stead than his1 ,christ in me joyance and the hope of glory3 ,but1 chafed with fetters and with manacles1 ,and worse bonds wearing of iniquity1 ,he sits unvisited of this fair light1 ,a midnight of no hope within his heart4 ,go pray for ,shimei thou1 and leave me here ,to pray1 if haply ,god will touch his heart4 ,so they two fell apart and mightily strove ,together in intercession and one prayer4 ,,book ,x4 ,,re-,,embarked4 ,arrived at ,myra on their way toward ,rome1 ,paul and his companions are transferred to a different vessel to pursue their voyage4 ,the new vessel is from ,alexandria3 it brings thence as passengers for ,rome two mutual friends1 one of them a ,roman1 the other a ,buddhist from ,india named ,krishna4 ,rachel1 having seen ,paul and the ,roman greet each other as old acquaintances1 soon inquires apart of ,paul who the ,roman is1 and1 learning is thence drawn on into exchange of reminiscence and reflection with her brother4 ,the two at length unite in interceding with ,julius on behalf of ,shimei4 ,they secure for him the freedom of the deck4 ,,re-,,embarked4 ,where on the towering shore a mighty gorge ,breaks headlong through the mountains to the sea1 ,and a deep stream into a haven large ,spreads for the welcome of all ships that sail ,the ,mediterranean ocean1 there of old ,myra1 metropolis of ,lycia1 sat2 ,mart once of many meeting nations--now ,a few colossal shadows sign and say ,mutely1 ',here ,myra was1 and she was great6' ,at ,myra safe arrived and anchor cast1 ,that ,adramyttian vessel disembarked ,her voyagers bound to ,rome1 and went her way4 ,when she at ,csarea touching found ,that ,jewish prisoner there and bore him thence1 ,she had suddenly gone sailing unaware1 ,in transit as of star athwart the sun1 ,into the solar light of history2 ,at ,myra parting with him she passed on ,into the rim of dark and disappeared3 ,a moment in a light she guessed not of ,illuminated for all time to see1 ,then heedless dipping deep her plunging keel ,and foundering in the gulfs of the unknown6 ,a bark of ,egypt seeking ,italy1 ,wheat-laden of the fatness of the ,nile1 ,swung resting in the ,myra roadstead nigh4 ,hereon were re-embarked that company1 ,paul1 and the friends that sailed with ,paul to ,rome-- ,fallen ,felix too1 with his wife spurring him ,to hope yet and to strive and still be strong4 ,alexandreia sent the vessel forth1 ,city twice famous1 joining to her own ,the august tradition of her founder's fame1 ,the mighty ,macedonian's mightier son1 ,great ,alexander who the whole world gained ,indeed--with what for profit of it all8 ,at this sea-gate wide opening to the ,west1 ,from all the ,east men met and hence dispersed-- ,that current laden most which drew to ,rome4 ,besides from ,egypt her hierophants1 ,hence thither flocked those worshippers of fire ,from ,persia holding ,zoroaster sage1 ,astrologers of ,assyria1 and from ,ind ,confessors of the somber faith of ,buddh4 ,of many such as these on board that bark ,one ,indian ,buddhist votary there was ,worthy of note3 a gentle-mannered man ,deep in himself involved1 as who mused much ,of hidden things and hard to understand1 ,the pathos of the mystery of the world1 ,the human strife1 with the defeat foregone ,companioning the strife and ending it-- ,yet ending not a strife that could not end1 ,but ever1 round and round1 one dull defeat1 ,trod the treadmill of fate1 no hope1 no goal4 ,a gentle-mannered man1 but sad of cheer1 ,krishna his name1 pilgrim of many climes1 ,not idly curious to behold and learn1 ,but hiding pity in his heart for men ,seen everywhere the same1 poor blinded moles ,toiling and moiling in the sunless mines ,of being1 where no joy1 whence no escape4 ,escape none1 or1 if any1 then escape ,impossible to win except by slow1 ,and unimaginably slow1 process ,of suicide to endless date prolonged1 ons on ons following numberless1 ,and fatal transmigrations of the soul ,from state to state1 from form to form1 of self3 ,yet progress none that might be felt the while1 ,but one long-drawn monotony instead ,of labor waste in movement seeming vain1 ,cycles of change returning on themselves ,forever1 bound to orbits that revolve ,eternal repetitions of the same ,vicissitude 7the weaver's shuttle flung ,tediously back and forth from hand to hand-- ,or swinging pendulum71 'twixt death and birth1 ,lapses from misery to misery ,always1 prospect like retrospect stretched out ,to vista and perspective vanishing ,of path to be pursued and still pursued ,by the undaunted seeker of an end-- ,he by his own act dying all the time ,in ceaseless effort utterly to cease1 ,will willing not to will1 desire desiring ,to be desire no more1 pure apathy1 ,no hope1 no fear1 no motion of the mind1 ,until1 through dull disuse and atrophy1 ,extinguished be capacity itself ,to do or suffer anything1 and so1 ,down sinking through the bottomless abyss ,of being1 at last the fugitive go free1 ,emancipate but by becoming--naught6 ,krishna thus deeming of his fellow-men1 ,their present and their future and their fate1 ,hid a vast pity in his heart for them1 ,pity the vaster that he could not help4 ,this melancholy man compassionate1 ,who might in musing to himself seem lost1 ,yet saw and heard with vigilant quick sense ,whatever passed about him where he stood1 ,or where he sat--for most he moveless sat1 ,moveless and silent1 on the swarming deck4 ,one man indeed he spake with1 yet with him ,his speech1 grave ever1 he spared1 and sheathed in tones ,soothingly soft and low like blandishment4 ,that one man was a ,roman2 ,roman less ,to seeming than cosmopolite--his air ,an air of long-accustomed conversance ,with whatsoever might be seen and learned ,through much ,ulyssean wandering to and fro ,and up and down among his fellow-men1 ,and watching of their works and words and ways4 ,this ,roman citizen of the world1 mailed proof ,in habit of a full-experienced mind ,against commotion from surprise1 was now ,visibly moved to wonder seeing ,paul4 ,his wonder checked with reverence and with love ,indignant to behold the captive state ,of one deserving rather wreath than bond1 ,he stepped toward ,paul and with such homage paid ,as liege to lord might pay saluted him4 ,grace unto thee1 my brother1 answered ,paul1 ,from the ,lord ,jesus ,christ1 thy ,lord and mine6 ,they twain fell on each other's neck and kissed ,with tears4 ,such salutation and embrace-- ,no more2 but this with variant mood was marked ,by three that saw it4 ,the centurion ,blent in his look pleasure with his surprise2 ,but ,felix and ,drusilla frowned askance 7,they also knowing the ,roman1 as at court ,courtiers know one another--without love72 ,those frowned askance1 and mixed their mutual eyes ,in sinister exchange of look malign ,portending sequel if the chance should serve2 ,and in ,neronian ,rome the happy chance ,of mischief1 but be patient1 scarce could fail6 ,that gentle ,indian with his pregnant eye ,saw all and mused it--then1 and after1 long-- ,the cheerful1 joyful1 reverent greeting given ,a ,jewish prisoner by a ,roman lord ,and by the ,jewish prisoner so returned ,in unaccustomed words ill understood ,but solemn like the language of a spell2 ,this1 with the ,roman captain's look benign ,approving what surprised him yet2 nor less1 ,the menace of the mutual scowls that met ,darkening each other on the alien brows ,of ,felix and ,drusilla at the sight-- ,most like two clouds that1 black already1 blown ,together1 shadow into a deeper dark6 ,in due time1 anchor weighed with choral sound ,of sailors' voices cheering each himself ,and each his fellow in a formless tune1 ,the ship from out the haven slowly slid1 ,urged with the oar but wooing too the wind ,with slack sail doubtful drooping by the mast4 ,large planes of lucid ocean tranced in calm ,they traversed with loth labor of the oar1 ,or else were buffeted of winds that blew ,thwart or full opposite day after day1 ,while they hugged close the ,asian shore1 then ,rhodes ,saw southward1 mooring fair her fruitful isle4 ,the leisures long-drawn-out of those delays1 ,to ,paul and to his friends were prize and spoil4 ,grown wonted to the sway of wind and wave1 ,they spent1 cradled at grateful ease1 the slow1 ,soft-lapsing1 indistinguishable hours ,that wore the sunny summer season out1 ,in various converse or communion sweet ,oft with mere sense of mutual nearness nursed4 ,who was that kindly courteous gentleman1 ,thus at fit moment ,rachel asked of ,paul1 ,that spoke so fair my brother coming up8 ,roman he seemed1 and lordly was his air2 ,yet something other1 sweeter1 differenced him ,from his compatriot peers1 and ,i observed ,thou gavest him thy grace from ,christ the ,lord4 ,that1 ,rachel1 ,paul replied1 was one ,i knew-- ,almost mightst thou have known him--long ago ,in ,tarsus2 we were boys together there4 ,but since then twice1 with now this added time1 ,has ,god in wisdom made our pathways meet4 ,that ,roman to ,damascus went with me ,and saw1 what time the glory of the ,lord ,blinded me to behold at last the ,true4 ,but him that glory1 seen not suffered1 left ,for outward vision what he was before1 ,while inwardly with denser darkness blind1 ,reclaimed from atheism to idolatry6 ,but ,god had mercy on him2 years went by1 ,and ,i1 with ,barnabas to ,cyprus come1 ,found there this selfsame ,roman1 governor4 ,the skeptic whom theophany had made ,religious not1 but superstitious1 now ,led captive of delusion--worldly-wise ,albeit he was1 yet unto ,god a fool6-- ,was given up wholly dupe and devotee ,of a deceiver1 ,jew1 ,bar-jesus named1 ,pretender to the gift of prophecy4 ,this sorcerer dared withstand us to the face ,before the governor1 who had summoned us 7,not dreaming whom he summoned summoning me7 ,to tell him of the word of ,god4 ,but ,i1 ,filled with the ,spirit of the ,lord--mine eyes ,on him1 that sorcerer1 fastened--uttered words ,which ,god the ,faithful followed with such blast ,and blight of blindness on the wretched man ,that he groped seeking who would lead him thence4 ,the governor beheld and wonder-struck ,to see ,god's work ,god's word at last believed4 ,the pagan playmate of my boyhood so ,became the changed soul thou hast seen him here1 ,in ,jesus brother1 loving and beloved2 ,and ,sergius ,paulus thou his name mayst call4 ,o ,saul1 said ,rachel1 in what history ,of marvel following marvel has thy life1 ,since when that noon ,christ met thee in thy way ,damascus-ward1 been portioned out to thee6 ,the stories of the prophets old whom ,god ,wrought through to show ,his people how behind ,the thick veil of ,his outward handiwork ,he ,himself lived and was a present ,god-- ,those tales of wonders1 let me own it1 ,saul1 ,had grown to me to seem so far away ,from our time1 and so alien from the things ,we with our eyes behold1 hear with our ears1 ,much more1 with these our hands perform1 that ,i ,almost had fallen1 not into disbelief 7,not that1 ever1 ,i trust--nay1 ,god forbid67 ,concerning them1 but into a listless mind ,which to itself no image of them framed-- ,fault well-nigh worse than outright disbelief6 ,that now the things themselves1 nay1 things more strange1 ,should be by ,god repeated in the world1 ,nor only so1 that one of mine own blood1 ,my brother1 should a chosen vessel be ,of this great grace of ,god through ,christ to men-- ,this less with wonder than with awe fills me1 ,and ,i--believe not1 faith were name too faint ,for passion such as mine is--,i adore6 ,paul bent on ,rachel eyes unutterable ,wherein a sense of sympathy serene ,betwixt himself and her he talked with1 shone1 ,and they twain dwelt in a suspense supreme1 ,silent1 of adoration where they stood-- ,the rapture of doxology unbreathed ,to either doubled as by other shared4 ,at length ,paul spoke2 his tones intense and low ,thrilled through the ear of ,rachel to her heart3 ,o ,rachel1 ,he who out of darkness once ,bade the light shine1 ,god1 shined into our hearts ,enkindling there this dayspring from on high1 ,this light of knowing from the face of ,christ ,the glory inexpressible of ,god6 ,a pause once more of rapt communion2 then ,this added in a chastened other strain3 ,but we such treasure have in urns of clay ,fragile and nothing worth that all in all ,the exceeding greatness of the power may be ,not of ourselves but ever only ,god's6 ,constrained ,i find myself in every way1 ,but straitened not2 perplexed1 but not dismayed2 ,hunted1 but not forsaken2 smitten down1 ,but not destroyed2 forever bearing round ,within the body wheresoever driven ,the dying of the ,lord1 that the ,lord's life ,may also in my body forth be shown4 ,therefore ,i faint not2 let my outward man ,fail1 if it must1 my inward man meantime ,is day by day in fadeless youth renewed4 ,how light affliction sits upon my heart6 ,it is but for a moment1 and it works ,the while for me an ever-growing weight ,of glory fixed forever to be mine6 ,i look no longer on the things about ,me1 seeming to be real1 since they are seen1 ,but far away instead1 far1 far away ,beyond these1 at the things that are not seen4 ,these for a season1 ,rachel1 the things seen6 ,but those1 the things not seen1 eternal they6 ,when ,i saw ,stephen upward into heaven ,gaze1 and behold there what no eye might see1 ,the glory of the ,ever-living ,god1 ,and ,jesus standing by ,his ,father's side2 ,when afterward ,i saw ,hirani stand ,before the anger of the ,sanhedrim1 ,his eyes not seeing what their faces looked1 ,his ears not hearing what the voices round ,were saying and forswearing to his harm1 ,but steadfastly his vision fixed afar ,and all his hearkening bent for sounds unheard1 ,sights1 sounds1 sent couriers from the world to come1 ,the real world1 the eternal1 and the blest-- ,how little knew ,i then what now ,i know6 ,o ,rachel1 why was ,i not then disturbed ,with doubts and fears1 and guesses of the true8 ,the darkness of that hour before the dawn6 ,the brightness of this full-accomplished day6 ,the glory of that other day that waits6 ,the ,jacob's ladder and the shining rounds6 ,the moving pomps of angels up and down ,ascending and descending the degrees ,betwixt the heights of heavenly and my feet6 ,now unto ,him that in such darkness died1 ,but rose amid such brightness from the tomb ,and reascended where ,he was before ,to glory inaccessible with ,god1 ,and there expects until ,he thither bring ,us also both to witness and to share ,his exaltation to the almighty throne-- ,to our ,lord ,christ1 ,redeemer by ,his blood1 ,worthy1 and only worthy1 to receive ,ascription without measure of men's praise1 ,be honor1 worship1 thanks1 obedience1 paid1 ,and love1 even love like ,his1 forevermore6 ,rachel had barely to her brother's words ,breathed fervently her low amen1 when he1 ,the passion of doxology unspent ,yet quivering in his tones1 went on and said3 ,but1 ,rachel1 all amid this strain of joy ,exulting like a fountain in my heart-- ,unspeakable and full of glory indeed1 ,as ,peter matched it with his mighty phrase6-- ,yea1 in it1 as if of it and the same1 ,i feel a sense of pathos and of pain ,and hint of earthly with the heavenly mixed4 ,i cannot but of ,shimei think1 and grieve-- ,the grief indeed a paradox of joy1 ,such pity and such anguish of desire ,to help and save6 ,can we not succor him8 ,can we not have him forth of his duress ,in dungeon into this fair light of day8 ,i feel it must be possible4 ,pray thou1 ,and ,i will pray1 and haply ,god may touch ,the heart of ,julius to such act of grace ,that at our suit and intercession he ,will bid the wretched bondman up again ,out of the noisome darkness where he pines1 ,if to full freedom not1 at least to breathe ,the freshness of the unpolluted air ,and feel the force of the reviving sun4 ,sick he may be1 in prison is1 we know1 ,and neighbor let us count him1 taught of ,christ ,to hold for neighbor any who in need ,is nigh enough to us for us to help4 ,sick and in prison ,jesus we might find ,in ,shimei1 if for ,jesus' sake we go ,and carry him the solaces of love6 ,but he1 will he receive what we should bring8 ,said ,rachel2 would not bitter-making thought ,welling up in him like a secret spring ,of brackish issue gushing from beneath ,a crystal runlet pure as ,siloa's brook1 ,turn for him all our sweetness into gall8 ,perhaps1 perhaps1 said ,paul2 we cannot know4 ,that were for thee and me defeat indeed-- ,to be of evil overcome6 ,but1 nay1 ,nay1 ,rachel1 let us hope1 and overcome ,evil with good4 ,what is impossible8 ,is this1 even this1 impossible--through ,christ8 ,love1 if love perfect be1 hopeth all things4 ,there is in love1 as ,john delights to say1 ,no fear2 for perfect love casteth out fear4 ,perfect our love1 be faithless outcast fear ,no counsellor of ours2 but hope instead ,far-seeing1 with her forward-looking eyes ,reflecting hither light from that beyond4 ,hope maketh not ashamed1 because the love ,of ,god is poured forth in our hearts a stream1 ,an overflowing1 like the river of ,god1 ,fed from the fulness of the ,holy ,ghost6 ,o1 how omnipotent ,i feel in him6 ,but1 behold1 ,julius6 ,let me speak straightway6 ,o thou1 my keeper--so to ,julius ,paul-- ,full courteous to thy prisoner often proved1 ,nay1 more than courteous1 kind--beseech thee now ,beyond thy wont be courteously kind6 ,what wilt thou1 then8 said ,julius4 ,grant it me1 ,paul answered1 to reprieve1 from chains1 ,i ask not1 ,but from his dungeon doom1 to see the sun ,and breathe this vital air1 the wretched man ,whom1 partly for my sake perhaps1 thou keepest ,immured in dismal dark duress below6 ,strange being thou6 said ,julius answering ,paul1 ,yet answering not1 with wonder overpowered4 ,that wretch1 that miscreant1 craven1 liar1 proved ,corrupter of the faith of men through bribe-- ,nay1 but assassin1 only that he failed1 ,assassin disappointed in attempt-- ,on whose life but thine own8--such man accurst ,do ,i now hear thee interceding for1 ,thee1 prisoner thyself1 and that--unless ,the story of his plot and traitorhood ,and band of forty sworn conspirators ,against thee at ,jerusalem1 have been ,falsely told me--aye1 that solely through him6 ,i wonder at thee6 ,art thou mad8 ,the day ,thy countryman confronted by thee quailed1 ,convicted of his dastard perjury ,which aimed to make thee murderer of him-- ,then1 ,paul1 ,i thought thee sane enough1 as thou ,with words launched like the thunderbolts of ,jove ,didst rive him to his rotten innermost6 ,yet then1 even then1 relenting strangely1 thou ,didst melt the hardness that became thee so-- ,making thee almost ,roman1 as ,i thought-- ,melt it into a softness like a woman's4 ,and now again from thee this wanton whim ,and suit of pity for that damnable6 ,i cannot make thee out--unless it be ,thou art moonstruck1 and maudlin-mindedness ,at times seize thee betraying thy manhood thus6 ,paul did not answer the centurion's words ,with words again2 instead--with look serene1 ,ascendant1 irresistible--received1 ,absorbed1 and overbore that other's look 7,which1 after the words spoken1 rested on ,paul's face in pity that was almost scorn7 ,quenching it as a shield a fiery dart2 ,till ,julius1 fain to yield yet somewhat save ,his pride in yielding1 turned from ,paul and said ,to ,rachel1 as in condescension dashed ,with banter3 ,let thy sister if she will ,go carry ,shimei tidings of reprieve2 ,a sister to a brother's murderer go ,and take him token of her love--and his6 ,a little softening1 as he spoke1 from sneer1 ,at the sheer aspect of her loveliness1 ,an aspect not of weakness1 but wherein ,there mingled1 with the lovely woman's charm1 ,something august of saintly matronhood1 ,remote from any hint of what could seem ,defect of sane and saving self-control-- ,thus wrought upon a little while he spoke1 ,julius to ,rachel turning spoke such words4 ,all thanks1 she gently said1 thou art most kind4 ,it shall be as thou sayest1 for ,i will go4 ,she turned1 but hung in action1 as through doubt2 ,with artless art of hesitation sweet ,beyond persuasion eloquent1 she said3 ,yea1 thou art good1 and gladly will ,i go1 ,but ,i--,i am a woman--were it meet8-- ,if thou declarest it meet1 then it shall be1 ,and thither will ,i venture down alone2 ,for ,god will round me globe an angel guard ,to treasure me from peril and from soil4 ,her grace1 but more her graciousness1 prevailed2 ,for won upon by her demeanor meek1 ,majestic1 and that awe of womanhood ,instinctive in a noble breast of man1 ,the ,roman1 with even a flush of shame at last ,not altogether hidden as he turned ,his bronzd cheek away1 spoke out aloud3 ,varenus6 so he called the soldier's name ,whose turn it was that watch to sentry ,paul-- ,the same that ,shimei late had sought to bribe-- ,go bid up ,shimei hither from the hold6 ,haggard1 dejected1 squalid from the filth ,and fetor of his dungeon1 in surprise ,with terror1 doubting what awaited him-- ,dazed in the sudden light his blinking eyes-- ,the more bewildered that he could not frame ,with any true and steady sight to see ,color1 or shape1 of person or of thing ,before him or about him anywhere1 ,shimei stepped halt and staggering on the deck4 ,a spectacle for pity to abhor1 ,and for abhorrence shuddering to behold ,with pity--wreck and remnant of a man6 ,the soldier would not touch to steady him1 ,but let him shuffle as he might his way4 ,scarce more than one or two uncertain steps1 ,and ,shimei insecure of standing stood1 ,shaken in all the fabric of the man-- ,like some decrepit crazy edifice ,wind-shaken trembling on the point to fall4 ,paul saw1 and felt his heart within him moved4 ,to the unmoved centurion thus he spoke3 ,wilt thou not let him rest awhile retired ,apart a little till his force revive ,and his eyes grow rewonted to the light8 ,have thou thy will with him1 the ,roman said1 ,so far as of his chains to ease him not4 ,thou art right perhaps2 a little added strength ,were well1 were timely1 in his present plight-- ,may save him over to added punishment4 ,so nurse him fair1 ye brotherhood1 said he1 ,and sisterhood1 of mercy ill-bestowed6 ,and round the ,roman glanced1 with ,roman scorn ,masking some sense of admiration shamed1 ,upon the group of ready hearts and hands1 ,the circle of ,paul's fellowship in faith1 ,now gathered nigh with looks of wish to help4 ,,book ,,xi4 ,,the ,,last ,,of ,,shimei4 ,shimei in his feebleness and distress is ministered to by the companions of ,paul4 ,thus relieved1 he falls asleep and dreams4 ,on his waking1 ministration to his needs is renewed2 and1 strengthened now with nourishment1 he sleeps out the night4 ,the next morning he finds himself an altered man4 ,he at length makes some loth acknowledgment to ,paul1 who in turn expresses his own sorrow for high words spoken in pride against ,shimei4 ,a storm some days after rises1 and ,shimei meets a sudden and awful doom4 ,,the ,,last ,,of ,,shimei4 ,a parable in life of perfect love 7,other than was in heaven to be beheld71 ,the clustering angels1 crowded nigh to see1 ,saw in the things that then and there befell4 ,it might indeed have been a scene let down ,suddenly from above in lively show ,of love in act on earth like love in heaven-- ,only that never in heaven is need of act1 ,from love1 of mercy such as now was seen1 ,a living picture1 on that vessel's deck6 ,luke the physician1 at a sign from ,paul1 ,with ,aristarchus1 one on either side1 ,supported ,shimei1 tottering as he went 7,too weak to wish or will or this or that1 ,or otherwise behave than just submit71 ,to where with feat celerity meanwhile ,the women1 of one mind1 ,rachel and ,ruth ,and fair ,eunic1 in a sheltered place ,had spread1 of rug and pillow thither brought1 ,a sudden couch whereon a man might rest4 ,stephen1 from out the store of frugal cheer ,by his forecasting mother's care purveyed-- ,provision for the needs that might attend ,the chances of sea-faring--brought and broached ,a flagon of sweet wine4 ,this1 to the lips ,of ,shimei in a slender goblet pressed1 ,cheered him his heart and made him seem to live4 ,all was in silence done1 and then1 withdrawn ,a little from about the man supine1 ,that company of ministrants1 one will-- ,among them ,mary ,magdalen too1 ,pathetic1 with her deep-experienced eyes-- ,kept quiet watch and wished that he might sleep4 ,and ,shimei slept2 a deep dissolving sleep-- ,unjointed all his members in remiss ,solution of the consciousness of life4 ,a long deep sleep2 a dreamless sleep at first1 ,then1 as the hours wore on and still he slept1 ,delicious reminiscences in dream 7,unconscious hoarded treasure of the brain17 ,were loosed within him of a dewy dawn ,forgotten1 and a time when he was young4 ,he had found the fountain in that land of dream1 ,and drunk his fill from it with sweet delight1 ,famed for its virtue to renew in youth4 ,the old man was a boy again1 at home1 ,a ,hebrew home though on an alien shore4 ,perhaps some soft insinuation crept ,into his sleep from that last waking sense ,of his1 the sense1 to him unwonted long-- ,a lonely man1 of wife1 of child1 bereft1 ,who never sister's gentleness had known-- ,of touch from woman's hand2 however it was1 ,shimei a vision of his mother had4 ,a son1 her only1 by his mother's knee1 ,that mother's blossoming hope1 her joy1 her pride1 ,he felt the benediction of a hand1 ,her hand1 laid like a softness on his brow2 ,and ,shimei's lips1 no longer thin and cold1 ,but warm now1 and with flush of lifeblood full1 ,moved in responsive welcome of a kiss1 ,her kiss1 and holy1 like a touch of chrism4 ,how fair the vision was that then he saw6 ,how sweet the tones were that once more he heard6 ,such sound1 such sight1 were better than sweet sleep2 ,and the fond sleeper fain would wake1 to dream ,so good a dream awake1 and to the full ,taste it1 with senses and with soul nowise ,bound from the right fruition of their feast4 ,so1 as of his own motion1 ,shimei woke-- ,and instantly was sorry for the change4 ,his eyes he dared not open to the day1 ,holding them shut to hold himself asleep4 ,alas1 in vain6 ,too late6 ,full well he knew ,now what he was1 and where1 and that in truth ,his happy boyhood had come back in dream4 ,yet lay he lapped in luxury of pain ,and pathos1 and sweet pity of himself1 ,and longings toward a past beyond recall1 ,with something also of a good remorse ,that he was such as then he felt he was1 ,poor broken worldling1 empty heart1 and old 7,in contrast of his visionary youth671 ,therewith perhaps some upward-groping wish ,that he were other4 ,all-undoing stress ,it was1 of elemental motions blind ,about the bases of his being bowed ,like ,samson1 and his state was overthrown4 ,those agd eyes that had been used to glint ,metallic lusters1 or of adamant1 ,softened beneath the lids1 unseen1 and tears ,forced themselves forth down either temple falling4 ,instinctively he stirred1 and with his hands 7,vainly1 encumbered with their manacles67 ,he sought to brush those trickling tears away4 ,they wandered down to mingle with his hair1 ,long locks1 and thin1 of iron grey1 unkempt1 ,close clinging to the sunken temple walls4 ,rachel with ,ruth remarked the motions vain1 ,and gently1 without word1 moved to his side4 ,there ,rachel with her kerchief wiped the tears ,with strokes as of caress1 so loving light2 ,but ,ruth1 observing for a moment1 turned ,with token to ,eunic1 quick of heart ,to understand1 who hastening lightly thence ,a laver full of water brought1 wherefrom ,the mother washed the forehead and the face1 ,as had that agd man her father been1 ,then dried them with a towel clean and sweet4 ,not once the while would ,shimei lift the lids ,that trembled shutting over his dim eyes3 ,strange new emotion made him shrink from seeing-- ,shame1 and a tenderness of gratitude1 ,and love1 that1 with wing-footed ,memory1 ,ran backward to his boyhood and there fell ,with tears and kisses on his mother's neck-- ,remembered1 she1 a woman--such as these6 ,the squalid wretchedness of his estate ,forgotten1 and its utter hopelessness1 ,was it not blessd1 only thus to lie ,ministered to as if he were beloved ,of some one1 he who long had no one loved6 ,melted like wax within him was his heart1 ,and when at length they spoke to him1 and said1 ,thy hands too1 if we might too wash thy hands6 ,and when1 he neither yes nor no with word ,or sign replying1 they1 with yes assumed1 ,did it1 assuaging with all healing heed ,the hurts and bruises of the chafing chains1 ,then the old man with a convulsive wrench ,turned his whole frame averse from them to hide ,the tears that streamed in rivers from his eyes4 ,and this they do for love of their ,lord ,christ6-- ,such muffled words1 sobbed out amid his tears ,and shaken with the throbs that shook his frame1 ,those women seemed to hear from ,shimei's lips4 ,lo1 ,jesus1 wilt thou master also me8 ,i cannot bear the pressure of this love6 ,crushed am ,i under it into the babe ,indeed ,i dreamed just now ,i was become6 ,so ,shimei to himself1 in words more clear ,with the abating passion of his sobs1 ,spoke plaintive with the accents of a child4 ,a start of tears responsive orbed the eyes ,of ,ruth and ,rachel at such token shown ,of gracious change in ,shimei2 grateful tears ,they were1 and hopeful1 and each tear a prayer-- ,how prevalent1 who knows8--for ,shimei4 ,god1 in ,his lachrymary urn reserved ,to long remembrance1 treasures up such tears6 ,paul1 at remove with ,stephen1 beholding all1 ,felt a great pang and passion of desire ,to bear some part and render a testimony ,of love and of forgiveness toward this man1 ,yea1 of sweet will to be forgiven and loved ,by him in turn1 that ,shimei needs must trust4 ,he thought of how the ,lord1 that extreme night ,in which ,he was betrayed1 ,he knowing well ,the ,father had given all things into ,his hands1 ,and ,he was come from ,god and went to ,god1 ,rose from the supper1 disarrayed ,himself-- ,as if so laying ,his majesty aside ,to clothe ,himself in mightier majesty ,of meekness1 with the servant's towel girded6-- ,then1 pouring water in the basin1 kneeled1 ,girded in fashion as a menial1 kneeled4 ,the ,lord ,himself of life and glory kneeled1 ,washing and wiping his disciples' feet6 ,and ,judas1 ,paul remembered1 was among them6 ,this is my time1 said he1 my time at last2 ,shimei will not resist nor say me nay1 ,and ,i1 with mine own hands1 will wash his feet4 ,but ,stephen said3 ,lo1 ,i have hated him ,more wickedly than any1 ,i beseech ,mine uncle let me do this thing to him4 ,shimei will know ,i do it for thy sake1 ,and it will be to him as if thou didst it4 ,so1 ,paul allowing it for his nephew's sake1 ,glad to confirm him in that gentleness1 ,stephen a ewer of water made haste to bring1 ,and there amid them all admiring him ,known to have hated ,shimei so1 he stooped1 ,with a most beautiful behavior stooped-- ,not without qualms of lothness overcome1 ,considering he how swift those feet had been1 ,how swift those agd feet1 how long1 had been1 ,to shed blood1 and what blood to shed how swift6-- ,and dutifully washed and wiped them clean4 ,the old man now lay utterly relapsed1 ,exhausted his capacity to feel1 ,resistance therefore1 and even reaction1 none1 ,a state suspended between life and death2 ,so had the vehemence of his passion wrought ,on ,shimei's weakness to disable him4 ,the women with sure instinct knew his need2 ,they lightly on him laid one covering more1 ,for now the coolness of the night was nigh1 ,and again wished for him the gift of sleep4 ,and again ,shimei slept1 to wake refreshed ,then when the moonless sky was bright with stars1 ,stars that not more intently over all ,watched1 than those faithful had watched over him4 ,refection from their hands1 both heedful meet ,and choicest possible to case like theirs1 ,strengthened the faster for a night-long sleep1 ,which with the morning brought him back himself1 ,a self with pity and terror purified1 ,but better purified with thanks and love4 ,so1 lapt in a delightsome consciousness1 ,half haze1 a kind of infant consciousness1 ,of being changed to other than before1 ,shimei slid sweetly on in reverie-- ,no words1 nay1 thoughts even not1 pure reverie2 ,but if that mist of musing in his mind ,had into thoughts1 like star-dust into stars1 ,been orbed1 their purport such as this had been3 ',i miss it1 and ,i feel that ,i should grope ,vainly to find in me the power that once ,was ever mine to be my proper self4 ,all standing-ground seems melted under me1 ,planted whereon ,i might with hope resist4 ,it is all emptiness1 all nothingness ,about me1 ,i am utter helplessness4 ,yet somehow it is blessd helplessness6 ,let ,him do with me as ,he will1 ,who now ,is dealing thus with me through these6 ,o ye1 ,his ministers1 ,o1 holy women1 ye1 ,behold1 ,i give myself through you to ,him6 ,ye have conquered me for ,him at last with love4 ,no weapons have ,i to withstand such might4 ,tell ,paul that he and ye have overcome ,for that both he and ye were overcome ,yourselves first by the love that made you love ,even me1 even me1 even me1 grown gray in sin1 ,such sin1 amid such light1 against such love6 ,forgive ye me1 forgive1 forgive1 forgive1 ,and pray ye all that ,i may be forgiven ,of ,him to ,whom henceforth1 unworthy ,i ,to be at all accepted to such thrall1 ,i give myself forever up a slave6' ,thus ,shimei1 in his formless fantasy1 ,which being nor word1 nor thought1 still less was will1 ,mused1 like a river lapsing to the sea2 ,so softly did an inner current draw ,him unresisting whither it desired4 ,it seemed to ,shimei1 in that strong access ,and overflow of feeling new to him1 ,as if it would be easy to speak out4 ,nay1 but as if he must at once speak out1 ,aloud1 for those to hear toward whom he now ,felt this delicious love and longing2 yet ,he never did so speak1 alas1 but wronged ,himself1 wronged them1 refraining2 more1 the ,spirit ,of grace nigh quenched with silence6 ,so it fared ,with ,shimei then1 self-shut from needful speech1 ,as might it with some tender plant denied ,its freedom of the sun and air1 that peaks ,and pines and cannot open into flower4 ,perhaps the habit of his heart life-long ,was winter all too fast for any spring ,to solve2 perhaps he could not1 if he would1 ,unbind its cold constriction from himself ,for welcome and exchange of sweet good-will ,such as he felt rife round him in the air1 ,wooing him1 like bland weather1 toward full bloom ,in frank affections and fair courtesies4 ,sad1 if indeed the faculty in him ,of finer feeling and the word to fit ,were lost through long disuse1 or by abuse6 ,but it was much in ,shimei that thenceforth ,he never was bitter again with cynicism2 ,the fountains of his evil humor were dry2 ,he never vented blast of unbelief ,to blight the region round him with black death ,to every springing plant and opening flower ,of cheerful faith in human nobleness2 ,that mordant tongue refrained itself from sneer4 ,yea--this with travail of will through enforced lips-- ,shimei1 in frugal phrase1 but phrase sincere1 ,gave1 of his conscience1 rather than his heart1 ,thanks to them all that ministered to him4 ,more3 after days of silence1 passed in muse ,and struggle in secret with himself1 and prayer1 ,once1 having asked to speak with ,paul apart ,and easily won what he desired1 he said3 ,behold1 ,o ,saul1 ,i think that ,i have erred1 ,mistaking thee1 perhaps myself mistaking-- ,yea1 but ,i know that ,i mistook myself1 ,and mistook ,god1 both what ,he was and wished2 ,most wickedly mistook ,him1 honestly-- ,honestly deeming ,him other than ,he was1 ,imputing honestly what was not ,his will-- ,mistaking1 with no heed not to mistake6 ,this was my wickedness1 that lightly ,i ,misdeemed ,him such an one as ,i myself4 ,and thee ,i wronged comparing thee with myself1 ,and hated thee for what1 ,i now am sure1 ,thou wast not4 ,saul1 ,i need to be forgiven6-- ,wherewith his heavy head the old man bent low1 ,with his uplifted hands in manacles ,seeking to hide his face as if in shame2 ,not shame that he had sinned1 but that he now ,had spoken thus4 ,yet did that gesture naught ,diminish from his words1 but only show ,at cost how great he had wrung them from himself4 ,paul understood the anguish of his mind1 ,and said to ,shimei3 ,nay1 my brother1 nay1 ,forgiven thou art1 nor needst to be forgiven1 ,or at least ,i have nothing to forgive thee2 ,i long ago forgave thee all in all4 ,but ,i myself would be of thee forgiven6 ,i vexed thee once with high words spoken in pride2 ,i never have forgiven myself that pride4 ,forgive me thou it1 thou1 that hadst thy hate ,needlessly blown to hotter flame thereby4 ,let us forgive each other and love henceforth1 ,as ,god1 for ,christ's sake1 will us both forgive6 ,as ,paul these last words spoke1 he strongly yearned1 ,even for ,christ's sake1 to throw himself in tears ,on ,shimei's neck and there weep out his love4 ,but he1 for ,shimei's sake1 forbore2 he saw ,that ,shimei1 softened as he was1 and changed1 ,was not ripe for forgiveness so complete4 ,so ,paul forbore1 rejoiced that ,shimei spoke ,no word1 and signified with silence naught1 ,in blasphemy of the ,belovd ,name2 ,name by himself in hope1 not without fear1 ,pronounced--like costliest pearl at venture flung ,before what under foot might trample it ,and round to rend the largess-giver turn4 ,the chill obstruction never to the end ,was altogether thawed in ,shimei's heart ,to make him childlike placable and mild4 ,perhaps more time1 and vernal influence ,permitted longer to brood over him1 ,had made it different2 but the time was short ,for ,shimei in that air of ,paradise4 ,the voyage long had been with froward winds2 ,at length those winds blew into tempest wild1 ,with winter lightnings strangely intermixed1 ,god thundering marvellously with ,his voice3 ,all on that ship were awed1 and some appalled4 ,shimei1 hugging himself upon the deck ,where most were gathered1 for to most it seemed ,better to stand beneath the open sky ,shelterless1 than1 though sheltered1 not to see ,god make himself thus terrible in storm-- ,shimei1 who1 not more helpless than the rest1 ,felt a degree more helpless through his chains1 ,listened intently1 with some power of calm ,communicated to him1 while1 in tones ,depressed unshaken into depths of awe1 ,paul1 meek inheritor of the universe1 ,as conscious child to ,god through ,jesus ,christ-- ,the spirit of adoption in his heart ,that moment crying1 ,abba ,father6--spoke ,of how those dwelling in the secret place ,of the ,most ,high1 beneath the shadow abode ,of the ,almighty1 safe from every harm4 ,amid the booms of thunder bursting nigh ,the dreadful forks of lightning flashed the while ,and fell all round the ship into the sea1 ,frequent1 dividing pathways blinding bright ,between sheer walls of blackness built like stone1 ,so dense was piled the darkness of the night6 ,for it was night1 no moon1 no star1 and cloud ,hung drooping in festoons from all the sky ,wind-swept along the bosom of the deep-- ,sky only by the lightning flashes seen1 ,at intervals1 yet every moment felt1 ,oppressive1 like a mighty incubus4 ,the lightning flashes thick and thicker fell1 ,near1 nearer1 deadlier1 as in conscious aim1 ,like the fierce vengeful flames from heaven that once ,elijah prophet1 on ,mount ,carmel1 drew ,down on his altar trenched about with flood3 ,those tongues of fire that circling trench lapped dry1 ,but these divided tongues of lightning seemed ,equal to lick the boundless ocean up6 ,the watchers huddling on the deck beheld ,in silence--for now also ,paul was dumb-- ,the imminent menace of the elements4 ,then what might seem a frightful sign from heaven6 ,a leap of lightning and a rending roar ,of thunder at one selfsame moment broke1 ,sudden1 and nigh at hand--as if he1 seen ,of ,john on ,patmos isle1 that angel dread 7,who1 setting his right foot upon the sea ,and his left foot upon the land1 so cried ,with a loud voice7 now standing on this ship ,had once more cried and loosed the thunders seven1 ,so manifold the noise6--and therewith swayed ,the sword of ,god in a descending stroke ,on some one there select for punishment4 ,they looked1 and1 lo1 the fearful stroke had fallen ,on ,shimei2 he lay lifeless on the deck4 ,no motion1 save of falling1 and no voice-- ,appalling silence and appalling calm6 ,close at the foot of the tall mast he fell1 ,against which with his shoulder he had leaned ,to stay him where he stood and watched the storm4 ,the storm seemed broken with that burst of rage1 ,and quieted itself through slow degrees ,of sullenness to peace4 ,but the tall mast ,at top had been enkindled with the touch ,of the fell lightning1 and it burned a while ,lifted amid the tempest and the night1 ,a beacon flaming from the ,most ,high ,god4 ,such was the end of ,shimei1 unforeshown2 ,to this he tended all those devious ways6 ,next morning mid a weather pacified ,they shrouded him for burial in the deep4 ,until the sea give up its dead6 said ,paul ,solemnly1 as the corse went weighted down4 ,julius would not let free his hands from chains2 ,culprit he was and culprit he shall go1 ,he said1 to ,hades by this watery way4 ,incensd ,jupiter despatched him hence1 ,and ,neptune will convey him duly down ,to where their brother ,pluto will behold ,upon him the ,olympian's thunderbrand1 ,and send to ,rhadamanthus to be judged6 ,but ,paul said to his company apart3 ,let us not judge before the time2 the ,day1 ,the ,day1 that shall declare it4 ,let us hope2 ,the mercy of the ,lord is measureless3 ,it is1 even like ,his judgment1 a great deep1 ,and it endures forever2 as the psalm ,sings it1 again and yet again1 in long ,antiphony of praise that cannot end4 ,think not1 because the promise is no harm ,shall light on any one who dwells within ,the secret place of the ,most ,high1 that thence1 ,seeing this awful-seeming way of death ,has found out ,shimei1 he perforce has proved ,not to have fixed his dwelling ere he died ,safe in the shadow of the ,almighty's throne4 ,the safety promised is not for the flesh1 ,but for the spirit4 ,the outward perishes ,in many ways that to the senses seem ,preclusive quite of hope for life to come4 ,but1 so the inward bide untouched of harm1 ,the true self lives and is inviolate4 ,that lightning did not fall on ,shimei's soul2 ,no certain sign was it of wrath divine3 ,nay1 even perhaps the opposite of such1 ,it may have been a fiery chariot ,with fiery horses hither sent from heaven1 ,to bear him up ,elijah-like to ,god4 ,far be it to say that this indeed was so2 ,yet often last is first1 as first is last4 ,ye saw how wrought upon our brother was ,of late to be how different from himself6 ,i trust he trusted in the atoning blood4 ,i shall have hope to see him yet endued ,in shining robes of ,jesus' righteousness1 ,translucent shining robes wherethrough the soul ,herself shows shining in essential white6 ,god grant it1 and farewell to ,shimei6 ,,book ,,xii4 ,,paul ,,and ,,krishna4 ,felix and ,drusilla on the one hand and ,krishna on the other disclose the contrasted feelings severally excited in them by what they had just witnessed in the lot of ,shimei4 ,krishna seeks from his friend ,sergius ,paulus explanation of the relations that subsisted between those ministering ,christians and the sufferer4 ,he at length requests and obtains an interview with ,paul1 and the two have a conversation1 one result of which is that ,krishna asks to hear a full account of the life and character of ,jesus ,christ4 ,paul proposes that ,mary ,magdalen give this account1 but ,krishna courteously declines to receive it from the lips of a woman4 ,the ship meantime puts in at ,the ,fair ,havens1 whence1 after a short stay in that anchorage1 it sets sail1 against the advice of ,paul4 ,,paul ,,and ,,krishna4 ,as one transported to a different sphere1 ,some sinless planet fairer far than ours1 ,amid new scenes and aspects there beheld1 ,would watch and wonder and not understand1 ,so had the most of that ship's company1 ,not understanding1 but much wondering1 watched ,what passed between the wretched ,shimei ,and those his ministers of grace and love4 ,felix1 discoursing with ,drusilla1 said 7,for he1 by virtue of his being himself1 ,perforced divined accordingly--amiss7 ,much painful cultivation1 for no fruit6 ,paul1 turn and turn about1 that time did seem ,his enemy at advantage to have had1 ,and prospect was that ,shimei1 won to him ,with all those unexpected services 7,sore needed1 in such sorry case1 no doubt67 ,would1 could he first make shift to clear himself1 ,right face about at ,rome and1 far from being ,an adversary witness against ,paul1 ,swear him snow-white with turncoat testimony4 ,how easily king ,jupiter1 with that pass ,of playful lightning1 brought it all to naught6 ,said ,felix2 then1 with change abrupt from sneer1 ,grim added this1 in sullen afterthought3 ,that lightning was a neat dispatch for him6 ,i wish that it had fallen on me instead4 ,ill-omened from thy lips such words as those1 ,drusilla answered4 ,and what love to me ,speak they1 thy wife and queen--not with her lord ,joined in thine imprecation dire of doom8 ,perhaps indeed we shall be separate ,in death--with death1 despite the difference1 ,but differently horrible to both6 ,for ,i have my forebodings1 bred of thine1 ,and dread to be somehow hereafter caught ,in some form of calamity unknown ,but unescapable and horrible ,and final and fatal as that ,shimei's4 ,and what if he1 our son 7thine image--form1 ,and face1 and character1 and all7 dear pledge ,to me of love that once his father bore ,his mother1 happy she as worthy judged1 ,once6--what if he1 our little ,felix too ,be in that dread catastrophe involved6 ,drusilla thus half feigned contagious fears1 ,but half she felt them2 for in truth she now1 ,so long in shadow from her husband's mood1 ,was under power of gloomy imaginings4 ,yet1 felt or feigned her fears1 she made them spells ,this day to conjure with1 when to her own ,image the little ,felix's she joined ,in desperate hope to spur her husband's spirit ,out of the slough of his despondency ,and comfort him by making him comfort her4 ,but ,felix was not fiber fine enough ,to feel even1 less to heed1 appeal wrung out ,though from sincerest pain for sympathy2 ,and now his own crass egoism coarsely knew ,how shallow1 or how hollow1 or how false1 ,this subtler egoism of his consort was4 ,drusilla's art defeated its own end2 ,felix more murkily lowered1 and muttered fierce ,betwixt set teeth in husky tones and low3 ,aye1 and why not thou too along with me8 ,count thyself meant--thyself not less than me-- ,in what that memorable day was said ,at ,csarea in the judgment hall-- ,said1 and much more conveyed without being said-- ,by that ,jew ,paul1 of dark impending doom4 ,if ,i am wicked1 sure thou art wicked too2 ,the gods must hate us1 if they hate1 alike4 ,let us1 since hated jointly1 jointly hate4 ,perhaps compact and cordial partnership ,betwixt us in some hatred chosen well ,will be almost as good as mutual love6 ,drusilla to such savage cynicism ,gave loth ear bitterly1 as one well sure ,it were not wise in anything to cross ,her husband's brutal whim1 and he went on3 ,there is that milksop ,sergius ,paulus--he ,roman1 forsooth6 ,the ,roman in his blood1 ,if ever ,roman ran therein true red1 ,has been washed white with something else infused4 ,i much misdoubt that ,paul has brought him round ,to be disciple of the ,nazarene4 ,a pretty pair1 a ,roman and a ,jew-- ,like us1 my dear ,drusilla6 ,and the ,jew1 ,in either case1 the chief one of the pair6 ,with such communings entertained those two1 ,adulterer and adulteress1 the hours2 ,the passion that they once had miscalled love1 ,yea1 even that passion--long in either breast ,with the disgust of sick satiety ,palled--now at length by guilt and guilty fears1 ,brood of ambition disappointed1 slain3 ,but in the ashes of such burned-out love ,smouldered the embers of self-fuelled hate1 ,fell fire that thus on ,sergius fixed its fangs6 ,meanwhile that ,indian ,krishna1 deep in muse1 ,masked with impassable demeanor mild ,from all about him1 from himself even1 masked ,a trouble of wonder that he could not lay4 ,he gazed with gentle furtiveness at ,paul ,and strove to read the riddle of the man4 ,he felt ,paul's spirit different from his own2 ,his own was placid with placidity ,resembling death1 or trance and apathy ,that would be1 were it perfect1 death4 ,but ,paul1 ,not placid1 peaceful rather1 seemed to live ,not less but more intensely than the rest1 ,his fellow-creatures round him in the world2 ,a life of passion reconciled with peace6 ',impossible6 ,passion reconciled with peace6' ,thought ,krishna2 ',i seek peace through passion slain1 ,expecting1 ,i the seeker1 not to be ,at all1 the moment ,i a finder am4 ,this ,hebrew has the secret now of peace2 ,strange peace1 not passionless1 but passionate6-- ,extinction not of being1 here forestalled1 ,like that for which ,i strive by ceasing striving 7,with fear lest after all ,i miss the mark1 ,and only strive to cease1 not cease to strive7 ,nay1 no nirvna antedated1 his-- ,that hope of our lord ,buddha hard to win-- ,but life increased with life to such a power ,as is the mighty river's grown too great ,to register in eddy or ripple even ,resistance in its channel overcome4 ,is life then1 boundless1 better than blank death8' ,so ,krishna mused in doubt beholding ,paul1 ,until at last to ,sergius ,paulus he1 ,breaking the seals of silence1 spoke and said3 ,if to thy thinking meet1 bring me1 ,i pray1 ,to speak with ,paul1 so named1 thy friend as seems4 ,but first tell me who was1 and what1 that ,jew ,to such plight of sheer wretchedness reduced ,that to be rid by lightning of his life ,seemed blessing1 whatsoever might ensue ,hereafter to him in his next estate1 ,doubtless some sad metempsychosis due4 ,was he perhaps a kinsman near of ,paul8 ,nay1 kinsman none1 save as all ,jews are kin1 ,descended from the same forefather old1 ,said ,sergius4 ,then perhaps of some of those1 ,near kinsman1 ,krishna said1 women with men1 ,who watched with that long patience over him1 ,and won him as from death to life with love8 ,nay1 also not their kinsman1 ,sergius said1 ,pleasing himself with saying no more1 to see ,how far the silence-loving ,indian drawn ,by unaccustomed wonder still would seek4 ,some reverend father of his people1 then1 ,krishna adventured guessing1 whom1 oppressed ,with undeserved calamity1 they yet ,honored themselves with honoring to the end8 ,o nay1 far otherwise than such1 he was1 ,said ,sergius1 vile1 most vile by them esteemed1 ,and that of rich desert1 a man of shame ,and crime committed or fomented still4 ,then haply--not of purpose1 but by chance-- ,said ,krishna1 groping deeper in his dark1 ,that vile man yet1 if even by wickedness1 ,had wrought some service to these kindly folk ,which they would not without requital pass8 ,still from the mark1 said ,sergius1 thy surmise4 ,that evil man no end of evil deed ,instead had plotted and led on in guile ,against these gentle people to their woe4 ,last1 and but late1 during this selfsame voyage ,of theirs from ,syria to ,rome1 on board ,that other vessel whence they came to us1 ,he sought1 with midnight bribe and treachery1 ,to compass violent death for ,paul1 a man1 ,as thou hast seen1 beyond belief beloved1 ,and for good cause1 of all4 ,that failing1 he ,with perjury and well-supported fraud ,of adamantine front and impudence1 ,charged upon ,paul attempt to murder him4 ,so ,sergius ,paulus1 with some generous heat1 ,and horror of the heinous things he told4 ,he said no more and ,krishna naught replied4 ,after much vexing controversy vain ,with winds that varying ever blew adverse1 ,they had made the roadstead of ,the ,havens ,fair4 ,here they dropped anchor1 glad of peace and rest ,and leisure to consider of their way1 ,whether they still would forward stem despite ,the threats of winter1 or there wait for spring4 ,krishna fell silent when those things he heard ,from ,sergius ,paulus2 silent ,krishna fell1 ,but in his bosom shut deep musings up ,whereof the first he1 in due season brought ,to speech with ,paul while they at anchor rode1 ,propounded with preamble soft and suave ,in words like these3 ,much merit hast thou hope ,doubtless1 yea1 and most justly1 to have earned1 ,thou1 and thy ,hebrew fellow-voyagers1 ,with all that ill-deservd kindness shown ,him1 thy base countryman1 whom1 thunderstruck1 ,fate hurried lately hence to other doom4 ,a millstone burden bound about the neck ,is karma such as his to weigh one down-- ',karma1' we say2 but otherwise perhaps ,thou speakest2 merit or demerit1 what ,accrues to one inseparable from himself1 ,in part his earning1 heritage in part1 ,the harvest reapt of virtue or of vice-- ,aye1 karma such as his was weighs one down ,in dying1 to new life more dire than death4 ,hard-won a karma like thine own1 but worth ,the winning though ten thousand times more hard6 ,paul felt the ,indian's gentleness and loved ,him with great pity answering him3 ,i know ,thy meaning1 and ,i take the courtesy1 ,while yet the praise ,i cannot1 of thy words4 ,my karma is not mine as won by me ,with either easy sleight or hard assay-- ,the karma thou hast seemed in me to find3 ,that was bestowed1 and is from hour to hour ,with ever fresh bestowal still renewed4 ,i had a karma once indeed my own1 ,much valued1 wage it was of labor sore1 ,but it grew hateful in my opened eyes ,and ,i despised it underneath my feet ,to be as dross rejected and abjured4 ,paul's sudden vehemence in recital seemed ,less vehemence from recalling of long-past ,strong spurning1 than that spurning now renewed4 ,unmoved the ,indian save to mild surprise ,made answer3 ,our lord ,buddha teaches us ,our karma is inalienably ours1 ,the fatal fruit of what we do and are1 ,no more to be divided from ourselves ,than shadow from its substance in the sun4 ,but1 nay1 that figure fails2 our karma is ,substantial and enduring more than we4 ,we die1 our karma lives2 it shuffles off ,us as outworn1 and takes unto itself ,forever other forms to fit its needs1 ,until the cycle is filled of change and change1 ,and misery and existence cease together4 ,such karma is1 the one substantial thing1 ,and such are we1 mere shadows of a day4 ,pray then explain to me how thou dost say ,thou ridst thee of a karma once thine own2 ,and how moreover thou canst add and say ,thou tookst another karma1 given1 not won4 ,i fain would understand the doctrine thine4 ,with something of a sweet despondency ,pathetically tingeing his good will1 ,paul on the gentle ,indian gazed and said3 ,o brother1 with all wish to meet thee fair1 ,yet know ,i that ,i cannot answer thee1 ,save as in parable and paradox ,beyond thine understanding1 yea1 and mine4 ,paul so replied because his mind indeed ,sank in a sense sincere of impotence2 ,but partly too because he felt full well ,how all-accomplished in the skill of thought1 ,how subtle1 and how deep1 the ,indian was1 ,as how by nature and by habit fond ,of allegory and of mystery4 ,he deemed that he should best his end attain ,of feeding this inquiring spirit fine ,with the chief truth1 by frankly staggering him1 ,as the ,lord staggered ,nicodemus once1 ,with that which in his doctrine was the highest ,and hardest to receive or understand1 ,set forth in terms of shadow to perplex1 ,but also tempt to further curious quest4 ,merging the ,indian's idiom in his own ,and lading it with unwonted sense1 ,paul said3 ,that karma1 erst so valued1 ,i escaped ,how8 by becoming other than ,i was4 ,the old man died and a new man was born1 ,with a new karma given him1 of pure grace1 ,a seamless robe of snow-white righteousness1 ,enduement from the hand of ,one that died ,to earn the right of so bestowing it4 ,raiment of filthy rags with pride ,i had worn ,before1 not knowing1 painful patchwork pieced ,upon me of such works of righteousness ,mine own as cost me dear indeed1 yet worth ,nothing to hide my nakedness and shame4 ,now ,i am clad in ,jesus' righteousness1 ,a shining vesture1 with nor seam nor stain4 ,proud words1 albeit not proudly spoken1 thine1 ,said ,krishna2 spotlessly enrobed art thou ,in righteousness and karma without flaw1 ,then thou hast reached the issue of ,the ,way ,and art already for nirvna ripe3 ,gautama could not make a bolder claim ,when1 conquering1 he attained the ,buddhaship4 ,yet meekly thou madest mention of pure grace1 ,and merit all another's1 not thine own4 ,a paradox indeed1 perplexing me1 ,such boldness mixed with such humility4 ,yea1 ,paul said1 the humility it is ,that makes the boldness thou hast found in me2 ,it were defect of right humility ,not boldly to obey when ,christ bids do4 ,christ bids me take ,his perfect righteousness2 ,i can be humble but by taking it-- ,boldly8 yea1 or as if boldly1 for here ,humility and boldness twain are one4 ,to thee thy teacher ,christ1 said ,krishna1 seems ,something the same as ,buddha is to me3 ,yet other1 more2 not teacher simply1 ,christ ,to thee1 and master1 setter forth of wise ,instructions and commands obeying which ,thou also now1 as he once saved himself1 ,mayst thyself save through merit hardly earned4 ,thy ,christ is will1 not less than wisdom2 power ,and help1 as well as guidance in the way4 ,sovereign creator and imparter1 he ,saves thee1 thou trustest1 through new life bestowed1 ,which makes thee other than thou wast before1 ,and therefore frees thee from the fatal yoke ,and bondage of the karma thou hadst won ,with labor when thou wast the former man3 ,the words are easy1 but the sense is hard4 ,hard8 ,paul said2 nay1 outright impossible ,to any soul of man that still abides ,his old first natural self unchanged to new4 ,submit thyself unto the righteousness ,of ,god1 and thou the mystery shalt know ,with knowledge deeper than the mind's most deep ,divinings of the things she cannot speak4 ,to fate1 the universe1 and necessity1 ,said ,krishna1 ,i submit1 because ,i must4 ,but to submit because ,i will1 to any thing1 ,much more to any one1 that is1 give up ,my will1 which is my self1 my very self1 ,to be another's and no longer mine1 ,consent to be another person quite ,than ,i have been1 and am1 and wish to be-- ,this thou proposest to me1 if ,i take ,rightly thy words to mean thou thus hast done1 ,becoming what thou art by vital change ,from something different that thou wast before4 ,i frankly tell thee ,i have not the power ,so to commute myself1 had ,i the will4 ',i cannot' is ',i will not' here1 said ,paul2 ,no power is needful of thine own save will3 ,will1 and thou canst2 ,god then in thee is power4 ,consider1 it is only to submit4 ,i feel my inmost will in me disdain1 ,said ,krishna1 this effacement of myself4 ,yea1 yea1 said ,paul1 it is the carnal mind ,in thee1 the primal unregenerate self ,ever in all at enmity with ,god1 ,which is not subject to the law of ,god1 ,neither indeed can be2 to be1 were death ,to that old self which must resist1 to live3 ,the carnal mind is enmity to ,god2 ,when enmity to ,god ceases in one1 ,then ceases in that one the carnal mind1 ,the original man with his self-righteousness ,his karma1 if thou please1 his good1 his ill4 ,he is no more1 and all that appertains ,to him is dead and buried out of sight ,forever2 but there lives a second self ,by resurrection from that sepulcher-- ,by fresh creation rather from the dead-- ,a new regenerate man at one with ,god1 ,for to the law of ,god agreed in will1 ,replaced the carnal with the spiritual mind1 ,warfare and death exchanged for life and peace4 ,into ,paul's voice1 he ceasing with those words1 ,there slid a cadence as of reverie3 ,he seemed to muse so deeply what he said ,that he less said than felt it2 'life' and 'peace1' ,so spoken1 no mere sounds upon the tongue1 ,were audible pulses of the living heart4 ,invasion thence of power seized ,krishna's soul1 ,and1 ',life and peace6' he murmured1 ',life and peace6' ,but said aloud3 ,strange union1 peace with life6 ,we look for peace only with death1 last death1 ,that death indeed beyond which nothing is1 ,no further transmigration of the soul1 ,no soul1 no karma1 all pure passionless ,non-being2 not a state1 since state implies ,some subject of a state1 and here is none1 ,to do or suffer or at all to be3 ,absolute zero1 such the ,buddhist's peace4 ',i am come1' ,jesus said1 so ,paul replied1 ',that ye might have life1 more abundant life4' ,life1 life1 deep stream and full1 a river of ,god1 ,pours endless1 boundless1 from the heart of ,christ2 ',ho1 every one that thirsteth1 drink1' said ,he1 ',lo1 drink and live with mine eternal life4' ,i fear fallacious promises of good1 ,sighed ,krishna2 life were good indeed with peace4 ,but me1 ,i hope not any good save flight1 ,save flight and refuge inaccessible ,from persecuting and pursuing ill4 ,being is misery2 ,i would cease to be2 ,no hope have ,i1 and no desire1 but that4 ,hope is for children2 ,i am not a child ,to chase the ends of rainbows1 seeking gold3 ,there is no hope that does not make ashamed4 ,i dare not hope1 eagerly1 even for death1 ,lest that likewise elude my clutch at last4 ,despair no less ,i shun2 despair is naught ,but hope turned bitter and sour1 postponed too long4 ,i only seek to cease from hope1 from fear1 ,from every passion that can shake my calm4 ,calm is my good1 and perfect calm is death1 ,therefore ,i wait for death with death-like calm4 ,thou wouldst disturb the calm with hope of life1 ,fair1 but fallacious2 let me alone to die4 ,with soft pathetic deprecation so ,krishna1 in form of words1 half faltering1 begged ,from ,paul no more1 yet added3 ,i would hear ,something of what he was1 thy master2 what ,he did as well as taught2 and whence he came1 ,and when1 and where1 and how2 and how he lived ,and died1 having achieved his ,buddhaship4 ,for me1 ,paul said1 ,i never truly knew ,my ,master while ,he lived among us here1 ,almighty ,god incarnate in the form ,of servant--glory and blessing to ,his name6-- ,though after ,he in triumph from the dead ,rose1 and ascended far above all height ,into the heaven of heavens to be with ,god-- ,whence he had stooped the dreadful distance down ,to ,his humiliation among men-- ,then ,he revealed ,himself in power to me1 ,and ,i beheld ,his face and heard ,his voice1 ,and knew ,him for co-equal ,son of ,god4 ,but thou1 besides that in this power and glory ,no man may see ,him save ,he show ,himself1 ,wouldst wish a picture of the life ,he lived1 ,the manner of man ,he was1 while still on earth1 ,the death ,he died1 and how ,he died ,his death4 ,there is one here among us well can draw ,the living picture thou wouldst look upon1 ,for she was with ,him when ,he walked the ways ,of ,galilee and ,jewry doing good2 ,she saw ,him suffer when by wicked hands ,his blindfold yet more wicked countrymen-- ,alas1 among them ,i6--put ,him to death4 ,with early morning at ,his sepulcher1 ,his emptied sepulcher1 she weeping stood ,and saw--but what she saw and all her tale ,of ,jesus as she knew and loved ,him here1 ,is ,mary ,magdalen's right herself ,with her own lips and is her joy1 to tell4 ,lord ,buddha would not let a woman teach1 ,indulging so much of recoil concealed ,as might consist with utmost courtesy ,said ,krishna2 but1 with wise avoidance1 ,paul3 ,and ,mary ,magdalen will not teach1 ,but only in simplicity with truth ,bear testimony of eye-witness how ,immanuel ,jesus lived ,his life on earth4 ,while thus they talked a movement on the deck1 ,words of command and bustle to obey1 ,betokened that the purpose was to leave ,the sheltered anchorage of ,the ,havens ,fair ,and tempt the dangers of the winter deep4 ,paul saw it and suddenly broke off discourse ,with ,krishna1 saying to him3 ,they err in this2 ,surely we here should winter4 ,let me speak ,a moment with the master of the ship4 ,krishna with such surprise as disapproved ,dimly in his immobile features shown1 ,watched while this intermeddling strange went on2 ,strange intermeddling ventured1 strangely borne1 ,captive to captor bringing advice unsought2 ,for ,paul to the centurion also turned ,when now the master and the owner both ,agreed against him2 but that ,roman chose ,likewise his part with them to sail away4 ,,book ,,xiii4 ,,shipwreck4 ,a violent storm occurs and the vessel is wrecked4 ,krishna1 having carefully noted the part that ,paul takes in the rescue of the lives of all on board1 and having noted besides the miracles performed by ,paul on the island of ,malta where they come safe to shore1 brings himself to signify now his willingness to hear from ,mary ,magdalen her story of ,jesus ,christ4 ,a company assemble1 including1 with the ,christians1 ,julius as well as ,krishna1 and ,mary begins her narrative4 ,this after a time is interrupted by a peremptory summons from ,felix to ,paul1 to which ,paul responds in person4 ,,shipwreck4 ,the south wind softly blew a favoring breeze ,as forth they put and stood for ,italy3 ,but that fair mother in her bosom bore ,offspring of storm that hastened to the birth4 ,for soon the fondling weather changed to fierce1 ,and1 blustering from the north1 ,euraquilo ,beat down with all his wings upon the sea1 ,which under that rough brooding writhed in foam ,to whirlpool ready to engulf the ship4 ,no momentary tempest swift as wild2 ,but blast of winter wanting never breath ,poured from all quarters of the sky at once ,and caught the vessel like a plaything up ,hurling it hither and thither athwart the deep4 ,the sails were rent and shredded from the masts2 ,the boat1 to be the hope forlorn of life1 ,was hardly come by1 so the hungry wave ,desired it as a morsel to its maw4 ,the ship through all her timbers groaned and shrieked ,and all her joints seemed melting with the fray ,and fracture of the jostling elements4 ,at their wits' end1 those mariners distraught1 ,feeling the deck dissolve beneath their feet1 ,with undergirding helped the anguished ship2 ,while1 worse than waters waiting to devour1 ,a sea of quicksand seethed1 they knew1 full nigh4 ,so the night fell but brought no stay to storm2 ,fresh fury rather every darkening hour4 ,the dismal daylight dawned1 and wind and wave1 ,gnashing white teeth of foam1 all round the ship ,howled like wild beasts defeated of their prey4 ,then1 as to bait those monster ravening mouths1 ,they portion of the lading overboard ,fling1 in the hope that lightened so the bark ,springing more buoyant may outride the storm4 ,but the storm thickened as the third day dawned1 ,and not the crew alone but all on board ,worked the ship's gear in the increasing gale4 ,they thus bestead1 the heavens above them lowered ,day after day that neither sun nor stars ,one instant flickered in the firmament2 ,the blotted blackness made one dreadful night ,of day and night confounded in the gloom4 ,hope now went out1 last light to leave the sky1 ,outburning sun and moon and star all quenched ,before her in that drowning drench of dark-- ,hope too went out1 touched by the hand of death4 ,then ,paul stood forth1 himself with fasting faint1 ,amid those famished faint despairing souls ,and upward reaching high his hand to heaven1 ,there kindled once again the star of hope4 ,chiding them fairly that they did not heed ,his warning word betimes to shun that harm1 ,he gave them cheer that they should yet escape1 ,all should escape with life from this assay2 ,only the ship must suffer wreck and loss4 ,the angel of the ,lord1 that ,lord1 said ,paul1 ,whose with all joy ,i am and whom ,i serve1 ,as ye have seen1 with worship night and day1 ,stood by me in the night and said to me3 ',fear thou not1 ,paul2 thou art to stand in ,rome ,before the bar of ,csar2 lo1 thy ,god ,hath to thee given all those that sail with thee4' ,be of good cheer then1 ye2 for ,i believe ,god that ,he will perform ,his word to me4 ,upon an island look to find us cast4 ,full fourteen days the ship went staggering on ,a helpless hulk amid the ,adrian sea1 ,when now the sailors1 deeming that they neared ,some coast-line1 sounded in the midnight dark2 ,then farther drifting sounded once again ,to find themselves indeed upon the shoals4 ,here1 fearing to be driven upon rocks1 ,they anchored1 and so waiting wished for day4 ,and now a dastard thing those sailors schemed3 ,under pretext to cast one anchor more1 ,as to that purpose they let down the boat1 ,minded therein to steal their own escape ,leaving the rest to perish with the ship4 ,but ,paul perceived their fraud and subtlety ,and said to ,julius with his soldiery2 ,let those men go and ye cannot be saved2 ,whereon the soldiers cut the lowering ropes1 ,sending the boat to surf and reef a prey4 ,as broke the fourteenth morning yet forlorn1 ,paul1 unconfessed the captain of the ship ,and master of his fellow voyagers1 ,in the dim twilight of the struggling dawn ,stood on the slippery deck amidst them all ,and stoutly cheered them to take heart of hope ,break their long fast and brace themselves with food4 ,for not a hair shall fall from off the head ,of any one of you1 said he1 and took ,therewith himself1 in act more eloquent ,than spoken word1 bread and gave thanks to ,god ,in presence of them all2 then breaking it ,forthwith began to eat2 this heartened them ,that they likewise strengthened themselves with meat4 ,thus comforted1 once more the laboring ship ,they lighten of her lading and the wheat ,sow in the barren brine4 ,the land descried ,they knew not1 but there was no land unknown ,that were not better than that wallowing sea4 ,so1 cutting loose their anchors1 they made sail ,and drove the vessel aground upon a beach1 ,where the keel plunged into the yielding sand ,which closing heavy upon it held her fast2 ,but the free stern rocked on the billowing surge ,that soon atwain must break her in the midst4 ,hardness of habit and of discipline ,partly1 and partly a self-regarding fear ,lest they be held to answer with their lives1 ,if even amid the mortal panic pangs ,of shipwreck they should let their charge escape1 ,made now those ,roman soldiers1 in the jaws ,themselves yet of the common peril hung1 ,ready to put their prisoners to the sword2 ,but ,julius stayed them for the sake of ,paul4 ,you that can swim1 he shouted1 overboard6 ,some thus1 and some on spars buoyed up1 and some ,on other floatage of the breaking wreck1 ,they all got safe to shore1 not one soul lost4 ,the master of the rescue still was ,paul2 ,calm1 but alert1 completely self-possessed-- 7,possessor of himself1 yet not himself ,considering1 save to sacrifice himself ,freely at need72 his courage and his hope ,inspiring hope and courage2 self-command ,in him aweing the rest to self-command2 ,his instinct instant and infallible ,amid the terror and the turbulence1-- ,winds howling and sea heaving and strait room ,for nigh three hundred souls in face of death6-- ,each moment seeing ere the moment passed ,what the need was and what the measure meet ,to match it--that serene old man and high ,was as an angel there descended who ,could had he chosen at once have stayed the storm1 ,but rather chose to wield it as he would4 ,the captain of the vessel and the man ,whose was the vessel1 these1 with ,julius too1 ,roman centurion as he was in charge1 ,grouped themselves close by ,paul and heard his word ,and had it heeded without stay by all4 ,i shall be last to leave the ship1 ,paul cried1 ,do therefore ye the things that ,i advise4 ,the women first4 ,lady ,drusilla1 thou ,commit thyself to four picked sailors1 these-- ,the master of the vessel chose them out-- ,two soldiers with them--,julius1 by thy leave ,and of thy choice--and on this ample spar ,supported thou shalt safely come to land2 ,and1 ,madam1 thy little son shall go with thee4 ,they lashed them to the timber1 lowered it fair 7,with ,felix desperately hugging it1 ,the image of a sordid craven fear72 ,the men detailed leapt overboard to it1 ,and steering it as they could with feet and hands ,let the sea wave on wave wash it ashore3 ,she was indignant to be rescued so1 ,but by abrupt necessity was tamed4 ,let me1 ,i pray thee1 save thy sister1 ,paul1 ,said ,sergius ,paulus1 who1 assuming yea1 ,forthwith led ,rachel--she with such a grace ,of confidence in him as made him strong ,following--to where a fragment of the deck ,disjointed in the vessel's agony ,lay loosened1 which he clove and wrenched away2 ,then watching when the vessel listed right ,and the sea met it with a slope of wave1 ,they1 this beneath them1 clinging to it1 slid ,down the steep floor into the frothing brine ,stephen was by and helped them make the launch4 ,sergius1 from the side opposite to her-- ,to steady the light wreckage all he might ,lest wanting balance it should overturn-- ,reaching across1 kept ,rachel's fingers clasped ,in hold upon the wavering wood1 until1 ,what with his oarage and the wash of waves1 ,they found a melting foothold on the sand4 ,krishna stood wishing to be serviceable1 ,and when to ,aristarchus1 stout and brave1 ,paul was commending ,mary1 at a look ,from the ,indian that imported such desire1 ,leave was given him to undertake for ,ruth4 ,each of the two life-savers rent a door ,from off its hinges and thereon secured ,the women awed in that extreme assay ,yet girded to a constancy of calm1 ,and1 ,stephen helping1 lowered them to the deep4 ,krishna was let down after by a rope1 ,no swimmer he1 but ,ruth too held the rope ,and drew him to the float whereon she tossed4 ,greek ,aristarchus was a swimmer born ,and practised1 and he plunged headforemost down1 ,soon to emerge with easy buoyancy ,and aim unerring true where ,mary rode4 ,the two then--,aristarchus in the lead ,teaching the ,indian how1 and1 with the rope ,flung to his hand at his desire by ,ruth ,and by him featly bound about his waist1 ,drawing the floatage forward1 while his own ,he pushed with swimming--won their way to shore4 ,twice ,aristarchus was1 for stress of wave1 ,fain to release his hold upon his float1 ,so fierce the tug1 and sudden1 at his waist2 ,but he1 by swimming and by seamanship ,consummate joined to strength well-exercised1 ,strength by the exigence redoubled now1 ,both times regained it and thenceforward kept4 ,mary meanwhile1 forsaken1 faltered not2 ,she felt the stay of other hands than his4 ,all his advices and permissions ,paul ,put forth in such continuous sequence swift ,that well-nigh simultaneous all they seemed3 ,the vessel swarmed with ordered movement mixed1 ,and the sea lived with strugglers for the shore4 ,of all these only ,simon had the cool ,cupidity and temerity to risk ,weighting himself with treasure to bear off ,in rescue from the wreck2 he his loved gold1 ,ill-gotten gains of sorcery and of fraud1 ,secretly carried with him safe to land4 ,stephen did not lack helpers2 ,julius bade ,varenus1 of the soldiers1 serve his wish2 ,and ,syrus1 a young slave of ,felix's1 ,sprang of his own free motion joyfully ,to help him pluck ,eunic out of scath2 ,for he had marked the youthful ,hebrew pair ,with distant1 upward-looking1 loyal love ,instinctive toward such virtue and such grace4 ,but1 ,nay1 ,eunic said1 not yet for me2 ,see there those trembling creatures--the hand-maids ,of dame ,drusilla--rescue first for them6 ,on a good splinter of the tall curved stem-- ,the sign of ,ceres at the gilded beak-- ,by the rude violence of the shock torn off ,when the ship grounded1 they tied the two slave girls2 ,but the shipmaster fair ,eunic's act ,of self-postponing nobleness admired1 ,and bade two trusty seamen help let down ,that beam life-laden soft into the sea ,whither they1 at the master's further word1 ,followed it1 as with frolic leap to death1 ,and brought it safely to the wave-washed shore4 ,then ,stephen and ,eunic1 each to each ,as if in a symbolic bond of fate ,linked1 with a length of rope allowing play ,between them for their wrestle with the surge1 ,and having each in hold a wooden buoy ,provided with what might be firmly grasped1 ,wieldy in size yet equal to support ,them safe above the summits of the sea1 ,were lowered by eager volunteers who all ,sped them to their endeavor for the land4 ,they reached it and thanked ,god for life such prize4 ,the soldiers that were bidden overboard ,to take their chance of swimming to the beach ,bore with them lines which1 stretched from ship to shore1 ,became the means of saving many souls2 ,the most were thus1 some buoyed on floats of wood1 ,some dragged half drowning through the sandy surf1 ,landed at last--forlorn1 but yet alive4 ,paul was not1 as he had his will to be ,announced1 quite last to leave the breaking bark2 ,centurion ,julius would not have it so4 ,when all except the owner of the ship ,and the shipmaster and himself with ,paul 7,and ,luke1 who would not quit the apostle's side7 ,were safe ashore1 he intervened for ,paul4 ,now so it was1 the mast to which was tied ,the rescue-line beneath the strain gave way ,and fell with a great crash along the deck4 ,on this those four made fast the brave old man ,who with his counsel and his cheer had saved ,so many1 counting not his own life dear ,but seen1 the crisis of the need now past1 ,exhausted1 tremulous1 and nigh to sink4 ,then having with great strength--helped by a lurch ,that now the vessel seasonably gave-- ,pushed smoothly overboard the noble spar ,entrusted with that treasure of a life1 ,prompt they plunged after it into the brine1 ,and having reached it1 clung to it1 and well ,buoyed up upon its surging lift1 were borne ,themselves with ,paul by urgent wind and wave ,safe to the beach1 where those arrived before ,met them with outstretched arms and cheers and tears4 ,the island of their refuge and escape ,was ,melita3 the ,melitans were kind1 ,and though they spoke a tongue not understood ,by ,hebrew1 ,greek1 or ,roman stranded there1 ,and bore the name 'barbarian' from the ,greek1 ,yet were they alien not2 in deeds they used ,a universal language of the heart4 ,kindling a fire1 most grateful--for the rain ,fell drenching and the weather was windy cold-- ,those shipwrecked strangers all they entertained4 ,now so it happened that to ,paul1 he too ,ranging to gather fuel where he could ,and fetching soon a fagot to the fire1 ,sudden there sprang a viper from the heat1 ,warmed from his winter dormancy to life1 ,and angry fastened hanging on his hand4 ,the islanders beholding doubted not ,but here some murderer1 saved in vain from death ,by shipwreck1 now was suffering vengeance due4 ,paul lightly shook the deadly reptile off ,into the flames and felt no harm4 ,but they1 ,the islanders1 kept jealous watch to see ,the doomd victim of those fatal fangs ,swell with the venom in his veins1 or drop ,haply at once a corpse upon the ground4 ,after long disappointed watch1 no sign ,of hurt perceived in ,paul1 they changed their mind ,and said among themselves1 ,he is a god4 ,the chief man of the island1 ,publius1 ,houses and lands possessing in those parts1 ,gave ,paul and his companions welcoming cheer ,in three days' courteous hospitality-- ,not unrequited2 for the father lay ,wasting with fever and worse malady ,in the son's house2 but ,paul went in to him ,and prayed and laid his hands on him and he ,was healed4 ,then others also of the sick ,among the ,melitans came and were healed4 ,so ,paul had honors from them thrust on him2 ,these he divided with a liberal hand ,to all1 and when at last they left the isle ,they went thence laden with a plenteous store ,bestowed of what they needed on their way4 ,but all the winter long they tarried there1 ,waiting for spring to open up the sea2 ,and many an hour was theirs for various talk1 ,they fenced in sunny places from the wind ,or grouped about their outdoor fires for cheer4 ,the ,indian ,krishna1 uncomplaining1 bland1 ,with that quick quiet eye which naught escaped ,and that deep-studying mind which rested never1 ,had slowly by degrees1 considering all ,that ,paul wrought or was wrought through ,paul1 been won-- ,against a passive incredulity ,inert but stubborn and resistant still1 ,the instinct and the habit of his mind-- ,to judge that ,jewish prisoner otherwise ,than when he hearing ,paul give his advice ,unasked about the conduct of the voyage ,had fixed on him the blame of meddlesome4 ,he owned an awe of ,paul's authority ,exerted for the rescue of the lives ,of those that sailed with him2 he shared the power ,of hope and courage that went forth from ,paul1 ,his words1 his deeds1 and1 more than either1 himself4 ,he did not quite escape some sense1 inspired ,by ,paul's thanksgiving when he broke the bread1 ,of other presence than ,paul's own in ,paul ,that lifted him to higher than himself4 ,when he saw ,paul from his uninjured hand ,shake that fell viper off into the fire1 ,he half-confusedly thought3 ',that seems not strange2 ,our ,indian serpent-charmers do as much4' ,but when those gifts of healing flowed from ,paul1 ,not singly1 but in troops of miracle ,sufficing the whole island countryside1 ,with only prayer and laying on of hands1 ,then at last ,krishna said3 ',i do not know1 ,is there some power in him greater than he8 ,what power8 ,not ,buddha1 unconfessed1 unknown1 ,yet willingly with that large tolerance his ,and bounty and sweet unconcern to claim ,acknowledgement of his gifts1 working in ,paul ,despite--nay1 ,buddha not1 he long ago ,passed1 and while living never power was he1 ,though wisdom manifold4 ,yea1 wisdom is1 ,that know ,i1 power2 but not the converse holds1 ,that power is wisdom2 and pure power it is1 ,not wisdom1 that in ,paul these wonders works2 ,no healing arts he uses1 no medicine4 ,whence is the power8 ,or what8 ,is ,christ the power8' ,in sequel of communings such as these ,held with himself1 ,krishna recalled the thought ,of the rejected proffer made him late ,by ,paul1 of ,mary's story of the ,christ4 ,he now would hear it1 if but still he might2 ,and so one calm bright day when winter smiled ,as if in dream and vision of the spring1 ,with proud repression of his natural pride ,he brought himself to say to ,paul3 ,o ,paul1 ,if thy friend ,mary ,magdalen yet ,will deign so great a grace to me1 who own ,my scant desert of it1 ,i with all thanks ,would hear her tell the story of her ,lord1 ,a group of those who1 loving and honoring her1 ,loved from her lips again and yet again ,to hear the story1 old but ever new1 ,of their belovd ,lord1 were gathered then1 ,with ,sergius ,paulus welcomed of their band ,and ,krishna and the kindly ,julius too1 ,in a recess sequestered of the shore ,where the sun shining from the open south ,made a sweet warmth at noon1 and whence the sea1 ,so capable of fierceness1 now was seen ,with many-sparkling wavelets beautiful ,and gentle in demeanor as a lamb4 ,cast in no mould of outward loveliness ,to lure the eye1 but of a native worth ,such that her person noble seemed1 and tall ,her stature--all instinct with stately grace ,her gesture and behavior--,mary sat ,that vernal winter noon amid her friends1 ,throneless and crownless1 an unconscious queen3 ,yet over all in her that made her state ,seem regal there presided the effect1 ,other and finer1 of a lofty mind ,arrived through sorrow to serenity1 ,and in the heart of pathos finding peace4 ,such1 ,mary2 who now thus took up her tale3 ,the story of my knowledge of the ,lord ,begins in shadow1 shadow of shame for me2 ,at least ,i feel it for a kind of shame ,to have been chosen of demons their abode2 ,the recollection is a pang to me4 ,i sometimes dare compare it in my mind ,with what ,paul suffers--and she glanced toward ,paul ,a holy look of reverence understood-- ',thorn in the flesh1' he calls it1 but my thorn1 ,within my spirit rather1 rankles there1 ,as messenger of ,satan buffeting me ,lest ,i should be exalted above measure-- ,i1 to whom ,christ the ,lord used first ,his voice ,uttering that ',mary6' when ,he from the dead ,rose in ,his glory4 ,surely ,i well should heed ,how ,mary1 honored so1 was the abode ,once of seven demons4 ,why this should have been ,i cannot tell1 unless to humble me4 ,sometimes my pride--or is it sense of worth1 ,sacred and not rebukable as pride8-- ,whispers me1 ',mary1 thou wert therefore choice ,of demons for their dwelling-place on earth1 ,because thou wert pure found and they desired ,a refuge that should least resemble hell4' ,oh1 how they rent me with their revelry1 ,the hideous tumult of their joy in sin6 ,and me they mixed up with their obscene mirth1 ,till half ,i doubted it was ,i myself ,foaming my own shame out from helpless lips ,that blasphemed ,god1 then laughed with ribald glee4 ,i was not mistress of my mind or heart2 ,reason in me was a distracted realm1 ,and will and conscience seemed like ships at sea ,driven with fierce winds and tossed toward hopeless wreck4 ,i wonder at myself that ,i do not ,fight against ,god who strangely suffered it4 ,but1 never1 never6 ,he suffers many things ,strangely1 but ,i1 this is ,his grace in me1 ,bow down at all of them1 saying1 ',amen6' ,the crown of all my reasons for believing ,that ,god is gracious1 is that ,i believe4 ,for why do ,i believe1 except that ,he ,makes me believe1 against so many signs ,seen in the world abroad which swear in vain ,he is not good8 ,o1 ever-blessed ,god1 ,who let those demons seven take up in me ,their lodgment1 that they might be so dislodged6 ,on an accepted day for me the ,lord ,was passing through the city where ,i dwelt1 ,and one that knew my miserable case ,implored ,him to have mercy upon me4 ,he heard1 ,he condescended1 and ,he came4 ,but how at ,his first footsteps of approach1 ,how did those inmates evil within me rave6 ,what riot1 mixed of panic and despair ,and hatred6 ,the whole land elect where ,christ ,upon this earth appeared1 when ,he appeared ,was rife with insurrection from the pit ,mad in attempt against ,him4 ,so in souls ,possessed by spirits from hell1 if ,christ drew nigh ,outrageous spasms of futile fury raged4 ,those demons seven in me usurped me now ,with tenfold more abominable rape4 ,they with my fingers clutched and tore my hair2 ,gnashed with my teeth1 and flickered with my tongue2 ,they frothed from forth the corners of my mouth ,with foul grimace and execrable grin2 ,in random jaculation hither and thither ,flung my arms wildly like a windmill wrought ,to ruin in a whirlwind's vortices2 ,writhed all my bodily members1 till ,i thought1 ,with what of power to think was left to me1 ,that surely nothing of corporeal mould ,had strength enough of life to suffer more4 ,while ,mary ,magdalen told these things1 ,her noble face took on disfigurement ,expressive of indignant horror and shame2 ,and hardly had she been still beautiful ,but for a pathos fine of gratitude ,tenderly crescent in it to the full1 ,that all was of the past1 no present pain1 ,naught but a memory6 ,when her aspect cleared ,and she composedly went on again1 ,it was as if the full moon late eclipsed ,with clouds rode from amid them forth serene ,in splendor1 regent of the altered sky4 ,those were the pangs of my deliverance1 ,the throes of evil possession overcome4 ',come out of her6' ,he said2 straight at that word1 ,rending me like a travail and a birth1 ,they fled1 and left me as one slain with wounds4 ,but it was a delicious sense of death4 ,i would be dead like that to be at peace6 ,i hugged the death-like trance in which ,i lay1 ,until another word from the same voice ,made it seem sweeter yet to live indeed4 ',i say unto thee1 ,maid1 arise6' ,i heard ,and ,i arose1 obeying1 ,i knew not how2 ,it was as resurrection from the dead1 ,or first creation out of nothingness4 ,the ,indian bent on ,mary telling all ,a fixed and eager heed that veiled itself1 ,as wont was to this devotee of ,buddh1 ,under a mask of face expressionless4 ,he quenched in silence of quick second thought ,impulses strong to speak and quit himself ,of doubts and questions starting in his mind4 ,he abode mute1 and ,mary1 after pause ,filled to each one with various thought1 resumed ,how glad was ,i1 and grateful1 when the ,lord ,permitted me1 with other women too ,healed by ,him of distresses like to mine1 ,to follow1 in the ways of ,galilee1 ,his footsteps as ,he went from place to place ,on ,his unending rounds of doing good6 ,he had not where to lay ,his head1 was poor ,though making many rich2 and it was joy ,unspeakable to us to minister ,out of our substance to ,his daily needs4 ',give to us day by day our daily bread1' ,the prayer was that ,he taught us4 ,god through us ,answered that prayer to ,him and we were glad6 ,not all those whom he cleansed of spirits foul ,inhabiting and defiling them did ,he ,permit to follow with ,him as they wished4 ,one man1 perhaps as sorely vexed as ,i1 ,being healed1 entreated leave to stay with ,him4 ,it may be there was some defect of faith1 ,whence fear in him lest he1 not with the ,lord1 ,might again be invaded by that host ,of wicked angels whom he ',legion' called1 ,and ,jesus out of kindness was austere1 ,to exercise him to a better trust ,needing not crutch of sight to stay itself4 ,i know not2 this ,i know1 and rest content1 ,he doeth all things well1 ,his choice is wise4 ,the ,master sent that man away1 and bade3 ',return to thine own house and publish there ,how great things ,god hath done to thee4' ,he went ,and filled that favored city with the fame4 ,who knows8 ,it may have been a better lot1 ,more blessd1 to sound forth the ,savior's praise ,and thus prepare him welcome among men1 ,as did that healed demoniac1 than to be1 ,as ,i was1 near ,his person in the flesh4 ,but nay1 nor more nor less1 no difference1 all ,is equal1 and all blessd perfectly1 ,to all that simply meet ,his blessd will6 ,some subtle charm of eloquence1 made up ,the listener thought not how1 thought not indeed ,that there was any charm of eloquence-- ,manner perhaps1 a flexure of the voice1 ,accent of clear simplicity with depth1 ,a strand of pathos braided into it1 ,the capture of an all-subduing eye-- ,these things in her1 but more than these1 herself1 ,say rather the ,spirit of ,god inhabiting her1 ,made ,mary speaking irresistible4 ,krishna did not withstand the undoing spell1 ,but yielded more and more1 as still she spoke3 ,o1 it was dreadful to behold his case1 ,that demon-ridden man's6 ,no clothes he wore1 ,but fetters and chains instead1 which could not bind ,his frantic strength to hold him anywhere4 ,like a wild beast in lair he lived abroad ,housed but in rocky hollows of the hills4 ,no man dared pass his way1 so fierce was he1 ,cutting himself with stones among the tombs4 ,when he saw ,jesus coming1 still far off1 ,he ran toward ,him and prostrate worshipped ,him1 ,crying with a most lamentable voice3 ',lo1 what have ,i to do with thee1 ,o ,thou ,jesus1 ,thou ,son of ,god ,most ,high8 ,i plead ,and ,i adjure ,thee by the name of ,god ,that thou torment me not6' ,for ,christ had said1 ',thou unclean spirit1 come thou forth from him6' ',what is thy name8' asked ,jesus2 and he said3 ',legion1 for we are many4' ,what was strange ,then happened2 for the demons prayed from ,christ ,to be not wholly banished from the land4 ',send us1' they cried1 'into the swine'--for near ,were feeding a great herd of swine--and ,christ ,gave them their whim to enter into them4 ,wherefore1 ,i cannot tell2 the ,sadducees ,among our people had no faith in spirits1 ,angels or demons2 so it may have been ,to show it no mere foolish fancy vain1 ,as they1 the ,sadducees1 had taught it was1 ,that there are wicked beings1 other than we1 ,unseen and spiritual1 errant in the world1 ,and that these sometimes truly may invade ,the holy of holies of the human mind1 ,that sanctuary meant for ,god's indwelling1 ,and wrest it to their own foul purposes4 ,no ,sadducee ,i trow had ,sadducee ,remained1 that saw that day the hideous rout ,made when those swine1 two thousand hoofs together1 ,rushed headlong down the lakeside precipice ,to perish in the waters2 reason none1 ,save that the demons had gone into them4 ,it was not sudden assault of epilepsy2 ,those swine at least did not imagine it all6-- ,over the face of ,mary speaking now ,a moment of sarcastic humor played-- ,a woman herself possessed1 then dispossessed1 ,of demon inhabitants1 may be forgiven ,a little natural scorn to be assured ,that she was only shaken in her wits6 ,and ,mary so recovered with a smile ,the sweet and holy candor of her face4 ,but now an interruption--for there came ,rudely1 from ,felix sent1 a minion who1 ,with little ,felix following him1 to ,paul ,drew nigh and said3 ,my master bids thee come1 ,for ,simon whom he honors has fallen sick1 ,and he would have thee heal him4 ,summons such ,delivered in curt wise so insolent1 ,betrayed the master through the messenger4 ,go tell thy master that ,i come1 said ,paul2 ,go thou1 but leave the lad to come with me4 ,so ,paul took little ,felix by the hand1 ,he well-pleased equally to stay or go ,in that benign companionship1 and went4 ,but first ,paul said3 ,perhaps the afternoon ,already is far spent enough1 the cool ,and damp of evening will draw on apace2 ,to-morrow1 if ,god will--and ,mary please-- ,our hearing of her tale may be renewed4 ,they1 thus dispersed1 and slowly following1 saw ,paul like a guardian angel in the guise ,of a serene old man and venerable ,lead on the boy and heed his prattling talk4 ,he had the ruffled spirits of his friends1 ,indignant all at ,felix's affront1 ,composed with only his superior pure ,detached ,christ-like serenity and calm4 ,,book ,,xiv4 ,,mary ,,magdalen4 ,paul declines to undertake the healing of ,simon at ,felix's request4 ,but ,simon had first refused to suffer ,paul's access to him1 at the same time warning both ,felix and ,drusilla of the evil likely to result to their little son from a touch to him of ,paul's hand which the sick sorcerer had just observed through the lattice4 ,felix and ,drusilla1 freshly angered at ,paul1 resolve together on his destruction4 ,a second meeting assembles to hear ,mary's story4 ,this time there is an interruption occasioned by a disturbing written message from ,felix1 sent to ,julius the centurion1 one of the listeners4 ,,mary ,,magdalen4 ,when one set high1 but hopeless gross in grain ,of nature--and through habit of license long ,and self-indulging pride of place and power ,grown grosser--by reverse of fortune falls1 ,and can no longer wield his insolence ,so widely as his wish were and his wont ,has been1 then often he will salve himself ,that sore-felt loss of brutal privilege ,by being more insolent still where yet he may3 ,so ,felix now wreaked his revenge on ,paul4 ,paul knew him powerless1 but he would not turn ,retort on the humiliated man1 ,or aught abate toward him the obeisance due ,the ruler that he lately was--a strict ,respect enforced by his own self-respect4 ,felix had with fair princely promises-- ,commended to those simple islanders ,by large report of recent royal state ,his and of prospects brighter yet at ,rome1 ,as by ,drusilla's airs of queen--made shift ,to lodge himself commodiously with his train3 ,under his roof apart ,simon lay sick4 ,thou hast heard doubtless what ,i would from thee-- ,so without greeting ,felix said to ,paul-- ,thy trick of healing for a gentleman ,i have the humor to regard with love4 ,a fellow-countryman of thine he is1 ,something too of a fellow-conjurer-- ,and ,felix grinned at his own pleasantry2 ,he has fallen sick in this accursd place4 ',physician1 heal thyself1' thou wilt say to him1 ,for1 aye1 he is helpless for his own relief4 ,heal him2 thou shalt not unrewarded go4 ,i think that ,i can serve thy cause at ,rome1 ,where there is need greater than thou wouldst guess4 ,for they love justice there so well they sell ,it high2 great sums1 money in hand1 they want2 ,or preferably sometimes they will commute ,for other things than money still dearer to men4 ,a mighty mart is ,rome2 they barter there ,justice for pleasure1 pleasure in various kinds1 ,most of it such as thou couldst not provide-- ,unless indeed thy pretty countrywoman-- ,but a sharp spearthrust look1 shot forth from ,paul1 ,sudden as lightning and as branding bright1 ,broke that word off1 and ,felix faltered on ,with forced resumption of his insolence3 ,a good round price they ask1 whatever the kind4 ,have me for friend at court and thou shalt thrive4 ,simple and easy2 make this gentleman well1 ,nothing but that2 just a few mumbled words1 ,a magic touch of hand1 presto1 all's done4 ,what thou art giving to these wretches here1 ,these beggarly ,melitans1 with no reward ,except the fun of seeing them jump for joy1 ,look1 ,i am purchasing from thee at great price4 ,but stay1 thy patient has not yet been told ,what thus is planned for him4 ,let me prepare ,thy way a little1 ere thy task thou try4 ,when ,felix entered where the sorcerer lay ,the peevish sick man was the first to speak3 ,that ,paul had little ,felix by the hand2 ,just now ,i saw him through the lattice here4 ,it is an evil hand1 beware of it4 ,its touch brings certain mischief where he will1 ,and that toward thee and thine he will1 be sure4 ,felix was startled1 but he cheerily said3 ,go to1 ,i was just bargaining with ,paul ,to have him use his laying on of hands ,for thee1 good ,simon4 ,cheer thee up1 my man2 ,we shall soon have thee out of this4 ,but he3 ,paul shall not touch me1 shall not look at me4 ,i fear him1 and ,i hate him2 out upon him6 ,listen to reason1 ,simon1 ,felix said2 ,thou canst not doubt he really works strange cures2 ,there was the father of ,sir ,publius1 ,and scores of sick among this native rabble ,have come out whole from under those same hands4 ,it served his turn1 piped ,simon4 ,it shall serve ,no less his turn to heal thee1 ,felix said2 ,i have made it his account to play us true4 ,hark thee1 my master1 for this word stands fast1 ,said ,simon1 rousing halfway from his bed1 ,i will have none of ,paul2 ,i will get well ,from spite1 rather than have those hands on me4 ,and ,simon moved in act as if to rise2 ,but ,felix stayed him still his bed to keep4 ,then1 thwarted1 he returned to ,paul1 and said3 ,he will not let thee lay thy hands on him1 ,a fit of foolish stubbornness1 he fears ,thee1 or pretends he fears2 he certain hates ,thee1 no pretence4 ,well1 he is right perhaps2 ,you fellow-,jews ought to know one another4 ,but ,i would trust thee1 ,roman as ,i am4 7,vaunting his ,roman franchise ,felix thus ,his clinging freedman's quality betrayed72 ,that is1 safe pledge in hand1 thou understandest1 ,such as ,i hold1 thou knowing well thy life ,hangs on my word for thee at ,rome2 would trust ,thee1 nay1 ,i trust thee1 ,paul1 and thou shalt yet ,despite this worthy's ,jewish contumacy1 ,heal him1 ha6 ha6 without his knowing it4 ,put him to sleep1 thou canst2 thou hast the drugs ,doubtless will soundly do it2 compound them thou1 ,and ,i will undertake he swallows them4 ,then thou canst fetch thy passes with the hand ,at leisure over all his ailing frame1 ,and heal him--joke as it were at his expense6 ,paul had stood listless with his eyes downcast ,and with his heart withdrawn from what he heard1 ,and ,felix had felt effect that penetrated ,yea even his triple mail of insolence ,and dashed him sore2 he had rallied all his force ,against it to maintain his tone assumed ,of falsely-festive brutal cynicism4 ,helplessly dumb he hearkened1 while ,paul replied3 ,lord ,felix cannot know the grace of ,god1 ,whereof mine is but trust and stewardship4 ,my power of healing is not mine1 but ,god's2 ,i have it1 not to use it as ,i will1 ,but as ,god wills1 who shows ,his will to me4 ,i dare not1 would not1 use it otherwise1 ,i could not1 ,he would take it away from me2 ,would not continue it rather1 for it is ,dependent momently on ,his immanent will4 ,i had no hint from ,him as of behest ,that ,i accomplish thine announced desire4 ,i might have promptly sent thee back such word ,by thine own messenger2 but ,i had seemed ,so to be wanting somewhat in the heed ,due to thy station2 ,i therefore came myself ,to tell thee1 ,o lord ,felix1 to thy face1 ,that ,i am servant of the ,most ,high ,god1 ,subject as such to no man's bidding1 thine ,or other's1 and not free to mine own choice4 ,yet so ,i half misrepresent myself1 ,for to mine own choice ,i feel wholly free1 ,my choice being ,his who works in me to choose4 ,toward ,simon1 although he love me not1 ,i bear1 ,god is my witness1 no ill will2 instead1 ,would ,i could serve him6 and perhaps ,i might1 ,i know not1 were his heart but right with ,god4 ,let him renounce his ways of wickedness2 ,god to all men is good who will repent4 ,but ,his face is as fire not to be quenched1 ,wrathful1 devouring to the uttermost1 ,against all1 no respect of person1 who ,strengthen themselves in their iniquity4 ,none shall escape at last1 although1 because ,god's judgment is a while delayed1 they may ,dream that it never will descend on them4 ,delay is but forbearance1 not neglect2 ,god's goodness leadeth to repentance2 woe1 ,woe1 yea1 and sevenfold woe1 alight on those1 ,all1 who despise that grace of ,god in ,christ6 ,no shudder of terror swept over ,felix now1 ,as when that wave of trembling shook him so ,at ,csarea in the judgment hall4 ,he recognized an echo in ,paul's words ,of what he heard that day from those same lips ,and then thought dreadful4 ',strange1' he dully mused1 ',how moments of weakness sometimes find out men6 ,why should ,i then have feared1 and naught to fear1 ,save words1 mere words8 ,solemnly spoken1 aye1 ,and ,i could not but hearken to the man1 ,majestic in his gesture and austere4 ,even now ,i sit and listen to the voice1 ,but ,i am fenced and mailed that it hurts not4 ,would that ,i felt but half as safe from ,rome6' ,so ,felix in a half unconscious sort ,heard ,paul's words then hollow and meaningless2 ,only rebounded from them to the doubt1 ,the hateful haunting doubt1 of what lay hid ,within the horizon of this present world ,for him2 deaf1 since that day of final doom1 ,to ,sinai thundering from the world to come6 ,two witnesses had witnessed that which passed ,thus between ,paul and ,felix3 secret one1 ,eavesdropper from behind a hanging nigh1 ,felix's jealous and suspicious spouse ,drusilla2 one in open view1 and frank1 ,observant while obtrusive not1 well-poised ,in sense of self-effacing loyalty1 ,young ,stephen1 shadow of his uncle ,paul4 ,he1 as of course1 fulfilling duty1 went ,wherever his illustrious kinsman went1 ,if aught of peril to him1 or need1 could there ,by watchful love be guessed4 ,paul now by ,stephen ,attended from that alien presence forth1 ,drusilla from her hiding burst1 and cried3 ,a ,jewish mother's curse fast cling to ,paul1 ,false1 renegade ,jew1 who has his cursing hand ,folded on little ,felix's this day6 ,heed ,simon1 and beware of ,paul4 ,o1 why1 ,why didst thou1 couldst thou1 think of summoning him1 ,hated of all his nation so1 to blight ,the hope and fortune of our shaken house ,with creeping leper's plague upon our boy2 ,or perhaps other mischief worse than that6 ,o1 ,felix6 ,felix6 ,o1 my lord1 my lord6 ,such woman's wailing and upbraiding broke ,all the man's force in ,felix to withstand4 ,he joined his imprecations upon ,paul ,and swore her ready oaths to work him woe4 ,then as the pair conspired in vengeful vows ,against him1 mutually to each other pledged1 ,with that young cub of his too1 ,felix said1 ,fair-favored as he is1 a meddlesome lad1 ,following his greybeard uncle round about ,with spaniel looks and watch-dog carefulness2 ,and our friend ,sergius ,paulus1 understood6 ,simon made good his threat of getting well1 ,and fostered and fomented all he could ,the viperous hatch of hatred against ,paul4 ,stephen reported to his company ,the incident and the spirit of the scene ,beheld by him enacted between ,paul ,and ,felix2 and all knew full well the dark ,presage of consequence for ,paul it bore4 ,a little more deeply shadowed in their mind1 ,pathetically hopeful yet in ,god1 ,they met next day again1 as had been planned1 ,in the same spot with the same weather still ,prolonging that winter interlude of spring1 ,when ,mary thus her broken-off tale resumed3 ,the wonder of the works that ,jesus did1 ,wonderful as they were for grace and power1 ,was less than of the words that ,jesus spake4 ',spirit and life' these were1 as ,himself said4 ,once ,i remember1 near ,gennesaret1 ,on a green grassy mound which swelled so high ,that mountain even it meetly might be called1 ,sitting ,him down as on a natural throne ,of kinglike gentle state1 there1 with the waves ,of that bright water kneeling at ,his feet ,and the blue cope of sky canopying ,his head1 ,he ,his disciples round about ,him drew ,and taught us of the coming kingdom of heaven4 ',blessd the poor in spirit1' ,he began1 ',for unto them belongs the kingdom of heaven2 ,blessd the souls that mourn1 for in ,god's time ,they shall be comforted2 blessd the meek1 ,for theirs the heritage of the earth shall be2 ,blessd the souls ahungered and athirst ,for righteousness1 for they shall yet be filled2 ,blessd the merciful1 for mercy they ,in turn shall find2 blessd the pure in heart1 ,for they ,god's face shall see2 blessd1 who make ,peace among men1 for they shall thence be called ,children of ,god2 blessd1 who for the sake ,of righteousness shall persecuted be1 ,for unto them belongs the kingdom of heaven4' ,i cannot1 interrupting so herself1 ,said ,mary1 cannot ever make you know ,how like a heavenly-chanted music flowed ,the stream of these beatitudes from ,him4 ,the lovely paradox of blessedness ,pronounced upon the persecuted1 seemed ,so like the purest1 simplest reasonableness1 ,when those unfaltering lips declared it true6 ,all things seemed easy and certain that ,he said2 ,certain1 yet some things awful and austere2 ,as when in that same speech with altered strain ,he sternly spake of judgment and hell-fire2 ,it was as if the mount whereon ,he sat1 ,verdurous and soft1 were into ,sinai turned1 ,and muttered thunder4 ,but when with a change ,and cadence indescribable ,he said3 ',love ye your enemies1 and them that curse ,you1 bless1 do good to them that hate you1 pray ,for them that use you only with despite ,and persecute you still1 that ye may be ,the children of your ,father in the heavens1 ,for ,he ,his sun maketh to rise alike ,upon the evil and upon the good1 ,and without difference sendeth rain upon ,the just with the unjust4 ,for if ye love ,them that love you1 what have ye for reward8 ,do not the oppressive publicans the same8 ,and if your brethren only ye salute1 ,what more than others do ye do8 ,do not ,the oppressive publicans likewise8 ,but ye1 ,be perfect1 as your heavenly ,father is3' ,and then when1 closing1 with authority ,he said3 ',whoever heareth these sayings of ,mine ,and doeth them1 ,i will liken him to one ,who wisely built his house upon a rock2 ,the rain descended then and the floods came ,and the winds blew and beat upon that house1 ,and it fell not1 being founded on a rock3 ,and every one that heareth these sayings of ,mine ,and doeth them not1 he shall be likened to one ,who foolishly his house built on the sand2 ,the rain descended then and the floods came ,and the winds blew and beat upon that house-- ,it fell1 and mighty was the fall thereof2' ,when thus1 ,i say1 ,he tempered ,his discourse1 ,sweetness and awfulness were blended so ,in ,his majestic and benignant mien ,as never yet ,i knew them--never until ,they met and kissed each other at ,calvary4 ,that1 ,mary with a look toward ,krishna said1 ,after a pause of reminiscence mute1 ,that was when ,jesus died upon the cross4 ,tell me of that1 said ,krishna answering her1 ,forgetful for an instant of reserve2 ,then added with self-recollection swift3 ,but all in order due1 or as thou wilt1 ,for ,i am debtor to thy courtesy1 ,and ,i shall listen fain to what thou sayest1 ,all1 and however thou shalt order it4 ,i find thy ,master's doctrine sweet to hear1 ,and partly not unlike our ,buddha's strain4 ,perhaps our guest1 if ,i may name him such1 ,downcast toward ,krishna turning1 ,mary said-- ,most welcome we all make him1 ,i am sure1 ,to this our simple hospitality ,of converse or of audience1 wherein ,i ,seem to be bearing here a part too large-- ,perhaps1 repeated ,mary1 now our guest ,will tell us something of his master ,buddha-- ,she therewith resting1 as to yield him room4 ,another day1 if ,i may choose1 for that1 ,said ,krishna2 pardon me my hasty word1 ,and pray thee let thine own tale choose its way4 ,then ,mary3 ,it were sad to tell the end1 ,how ,jesus died1 save that ,he afterward ,rose gloriously1 and that before ,he died1 ,in prospect near of dying1 ,he spake words ,so gracious and so full of victory6 ,how well we know it now2 but1 alas1 then ,our hearts were holden and we did not know6 ,strange that we did not know1 for oft he said1 ,oft1 and in many ways1 remembered since1 ,that ,he would die and after rise again4 ,yet1 at the last1 when ,he of dying spake1 ,our hearts were charged with sorrow1 and when ,he died ,our hearts1 they broke with sorrow and with no hope4 ,o1 it was beautiful1 most beautiful-- ,it seems so to the backward-looking eye1 ,which sees it now1 when all is over and done1 ,the shame and sharpness of the cross gone by1 ,and ,he safe sitting in the glory of ,god-- ,beautiful and pathetic beyond words 7,pathetic still1 though all be over and done1 ,secure the issue and blessd71 the way in which ,our ,savior faced ,his future welcoming it1 ,that future with its unescapable cross1 ,its mystery of ,his ,father's smile withdrawn6 ,for truly1 though our ,lord by faith foreknew ,the end beyond the seeming end1 the dawn ,to be after the shadow of the night-- ,the dawn1 the day1 the everlasting day6-- ,yet horror possessed ,his almost-drowning soul ,of that which ,he must suffer ere the end4 ,peter and ,james and ,john told us of how1 ,alone of all companionship1 retired ,from them even whom ,he had chosen to be with ,him1 ,he1 in the garden of ,gethsemane ,at midnight of the night before the cross1 ,prayed1 and in agony great drops of blood ,shed as in sweat1 desiring with desire ,to have the cup removed that ,he must drink4 ,it could not be1 it was not1 dread of death1 ,though painful and though shameful1 shook ,him so-- ,so ,mary1 swerved to sudden wonder1 said1 ,and question in her look as if for ,paul4 ,paul answered3 ,nay1 oh1 nay1 not dread of death2 ,that cup how many1 finite like ourselves1 ,have taken and quaffed with overcoming joy ,in martyrdom for truth6 ,some mixture worse1 ,o1 unimaginably worse6 to ,him ,embittered ,his inevitable cup1 ,that ,he1 beyond ,his human brethren brave1 ,so shrank from drinking it4 ,his was to bear ,as ,lamb of ,god in sacrifice1 the weight ,of the world's sin4 ,this crushed ,him sinless down ,immeasurable abysses into woe1 ,the woe of feeling forsaken by ,his ,god4 ,supported by believing in the joy ,far set before ,him ,he endured the cross1 ,despising the shame1 and is in sequel now1 ,we know1 and love to know1 at the right hand ,of ,god ,his ,father throned forevermore1 ,there waiting--,he1 inheritor of the name ,exalted high above whatever name1 ,the name of ,king of kings and ,lord of lords-- ,until ,his footstool all ,his foes be made4 ,amen6 in fervent chorus1 ,krishna heard ,break1 soft and solemn1 from the lips of all1 ,with ,mary1 who then thus her tale renewed3 ,before ,his passion in ,gethsemane ,and on the cross loomed nigh enough to ,him ,to cast its solemn shadow deep and dark ,over ,his prophet mind and over us1 ,we had been walking joyous through the land1 ,green flowery land it was of hill and dale1 ,with flocks and herds1 and villages of men1 ,the land of ,galilee1 gushing with springs1 ,and spreading fair her lake ,gennesaret1 ,now placid a pure mirror to the sky1 ,anon tumultuous1 if rash wing of wind ,swooped down upon it from the mountain shore-- ,we had been walking through this lovely land ,with ,jesus1 ,he1 like sower gone forth to sow1 ,scattering ,his gifts of healing everywhere ,broadcast about ,him as ,he passed along2 ,or sometimes feeding the great multitudes ,that1 like to sheep having no shepherd1 thronged ,his way1 feeding them freely from a hand ,that multiplied the bounty it bestowed2-- ,it was like journeying sphered with journeying spring ,created for us where we set our feet2 ,our hearts were garlanded as for festival1 ,so gladsome was it to behold our ,king ,advancing in such progress through the land ,and lavishing such largess on ,his poor4 ,but largess of beneficence from ,his hand ,was nothing to the largess from ,his lips ,of wisdom and of grace and of good news-- ,to the obedient2 the rebellious ,he ,judgments and terrors dire announced against ,that fastened and kindled like ,gehenna fire4 ,i was baptized with shuddering but to hear ,the woes leap living from those holy lips-- ,which then nigh seemed to smoke like ,sinai top ,with indignation--on the ,pharisees1 ,the ,sadducees1 the lawyers1 and the scribes1 ,unworthy found and judged for hypocrites4 ,most fearful as most fair theophany1 ,he6 ,one looked to see them flame1 as lightning-struck1 ,those cities of people that rejected ,him1 ,bethsaida1 ,chorazin1 and that proud ,capernaum1 when on them ,his woes ,he launched1 ,hurtling them from ,his mouth like thunderbolts4 ,to ears fresh wounded from such frightful woes1 ,how balmy and how healing were these words ,cadenced ineffably from those same lips3 ',come unto ,me1 all ye that labor1 ye ,that heavy laden are1 come ye1 and ,i ,will give you rest4 ,my yoke upon you take ,and learn of ,me1 for meek and lowly in heart ,am ,i1 and ye rest to your souls shall find4' ,with invitation or with warning ,he ,or with most sweet instruction heavenly wise1 ,our soul1 our senses1 feasting thus1 the while ,he wrought too with that easy omnipotence ,his manifold mighty miracles of grace1 ,we walked long time with ,jesus2 how long time ,i know not1 for the days and weeks they came ,and went unnoted and the seasons changed4 ,but at last ,he1 how shall ,i say it8 became ,almost a different being from ,himself4 ,he spake of a mysterious hour1 ',mine hour1' ,he called it with some solemn meaning1 what1 ,we could not or we did not then divine1 ,couched in the word2 that hour was now drawn near4 ,it seemed to frown upon ,him imminent ,and cast a somber shadow on ,his face4 ,he dreaded it1 and yet ,he welcomed it1 ,hasting the more to meet it as it neared4 ,we were afraid of ,him1 with a new fear1 ,he looked so awful in ,his loneliness4 ,for ,he no longer with us walked2 ,he walked ,before us1 hasting to ,jerusalem4 ,how steadfastly ,his face was thither set6 ,he as if saw the features of ,his hour ,coming out clearer and clearer1 and always there6 ,he now would oftentimes ,his chosen twelve ,take from the rest apart to tell them how ,the ,son of ,man1 oft so ,he named ,himself1 ,should be delivered up to the chief priests ,and to the scribes1 and be by them condemned ,to death2 and how the ,gentiles in their turn ,should mock ,him and should scourge ,him and should spit ,upon ,him and should kill ,him2 then how ,he ,should from the dead the third day rise again4 ,but they those sayings understood not then1 ,so simple and easy afterward1 though strange4 ,like a refrain recurring in a song1 ,some sad refrain that lingers in the ear ,persistent through whatever else is sung1 ,so did these doubtful boding prophecies ,again and yet again1 not understood1 ,at intervals return amid the strain ,of other teaching opulent and sweet ,that flowed and flowed in changes without end1 ,unending1 from ,his lips4 ,and all the while ,were miracles and signs1 as by the way ,and little reckoned1 dropping from ,his hands ,like full-ripe fruit from an unconscious tree6 ,and so it came to pass that we at length ,were nigh to ,bethphag and ,bethany4 ,here resting1 to a village opposite ,our ,master sent to fetch an ass's colt ,appointed for ,his use1 one virgin yet ,of touch from human rider to his back2 ,thereon the lowly ,king sat ,him to ride4 ,how little did what we saw follow look ,like the fulfilment of ill-boding words6 ,for now the people flung their garments down ,before ,him in the way1 they branches strewed ,from trees on either side to keep the feet ,of even that ass's colt which ,he bestrode ,from touching the base ground1 the while a shout ,went up1 one voice1 from the great multitude ,before ,him and behind ,him where ,he rode1 ',hosanna to the ,son of ,david6 ,lo1 ,blessd is ,he that cometh in the name ,of the ,lord ,god6 ,hosanna in the highest6' ,how little then to us1 blind eyes1 it looked ,as if this march triumphal of our ,king ,was to a death of shame upon the cross6 ,with wondering interruption ,julius asked3 ,but how1 but wherefore1 was it thus8 ,no crime ,had ,jesus done2 and what suspicion even ,of crime intended by him could there lie ,in any mortal's mind against a man ,so wise so pure and so beneficent ,as he was in the obvious view of all8 ,he added3 ,i could understand how some1 ,offended at his stern rebuke of them ,before the people1 might in secret wish ,his death1 might plot it1 and might compass it1 ,by private means of murder2 but how one ,like ,jesus should fall under law1 be tried ,in open forum as criminal1 be found ,guilty1 be sentenced1 and be put to death1 ,all as in process due of justice1 that ,i cannot understand1 that baffles me4 ,and under ,roman rule and government6 ,for crucifixion seems to mean so much4 ,perhaps some reason of state demanded it3 ,justice must often yield to reasons of state4 ,a reason of state1 said ,paul1 was the pretext1 ,and but pretext it was1 the real ground not4 ,with deep hypocrisy my nation came ,and pleaded to thy nation against ,him ,pretension on ,his part to be a king1 ,saying1 ',we have no king but ,csar2' so ,falsely affecting loyalty to ,rome1 ,and therewith falsely too attainting ,him ,of treason in purpose to dispute with ,csar ,his claim of worldly lordship over them4 ,thy nation1 ,julius1 with full equal deep ,hypocrisy1 believing the charge no more ,than they believed who brought it1 washed its hands ,vainly of guilt1 condemning innocent blood4 ,jew joined with ,gentile1 ,gentile joined with ,jew1 ,in one conclusive act of wickedness1 ,that the whole world at once might before ,god ,be guilty of the death of ,christ ,his ,son2 ,our sin it was that slew the ,lamb of ,god6 ,while the centurion hung confounded1 dumb ,with silence that half conscience-smitten seemed1 ,pondering ,paul's words1 charged1 heavy charged1 with blame ,involving him too in complicity ,of guilt with the whole world for ,jesus' death-- ,a messenger from ,felix came once more2 ,this time to ,julius with a letter sealed4 ,julius1 unready for intrusion such ,upon that moment's privacy of thought1 ,with petulant gesture broke the seal and read ,these brusque words1 which1 though writ with other's hand1 ,were self-shown straight from ,felix's own heart2 ,no salutation1 and no signature1 ,ambages none of complaisance or form1 ,frank unrelieved mock-kingly insolence1 ,drusilla's phrase1 but spirit ,felix's3 ,does it become a ,roman officer ,honored with grave responsibility ,as thou art for the custody and safe ,conduct of arrant criminals to ,rome1 ,to be consorting with the chief of these ,in affable familiar intercourse8 ,how thinkest thou8 ,if report were brought to ,rome ,of such acquittal of the office thine1 ,would it seem well8 ,dost thou judge nothing at all ,due from thee to the dignity of trust ,received from the august imperial hand8 ,is such thy measure of the faith required ,in one of ,csar's deputies8 ,or thou ,perhaps at heart art ,christian3 ask thyself ,if thine be a religio licita6 ,apostate from the emperor to ,christ ,am ,i to recognize in thee8 ,judge then ,what duty will demand from me arrived ,at ,rome1 me who am loyal still to him1 ,nero ,augustus ,csar named with gods6 ,these things read ,julius with a knitted brow ,that discomposure with resentment showed2 ,then mastering himself to courtesy ,wherein some air of condescension played1 ,he made his peace by gesture without word1 ,and slowly1 like one doubting1 went away4 ,with nothing said or signed to set in light ,the meaning of the message thus conveyed1 ,paul from the person of the messenger1 ,well-known a slave of ,felix's1 divined ,the meaning mischievous1 but kept his thought ,and only said3 ,with the centurion now ,our guest no longer1 and the day so far ,declined from its meridian1 meet perhaps ,it were to let our interrupted tale ,from ,mary--thanks to whom once more we owe-- ,rest till to-morrow1 if to-morrow be ,ours1 and the weather then still smile as now3 ,god will still smile1 through weather fair or foul4 ,and now to ,god our ,father blessing be1 ,from whom all blessing is1 and to ,his ,son1 ,and to the ,holy ,ghost4 ,amen6 ,amen6 ,they echoed all1 with not even ,krishna mute2 ,then silently and solemnly withdrew4 ,,book ,,xv4 ,,young ,,stephen ,,and ,,felix4 ,drusilla has a confidential conference with ,simon the sorcerer1 now recovered1 though still weak4 ,he tempts her to think of ensnaring the emperor with her charms4 ,he insinuates into her mind the idea of making away with ,felix on the ground of his being an obstacle in her path to success ,with this in view1 he forms suddenly a plot to convict ,felix in his wife's eyes of infidelity to herself4 ,he easily awakens ,drusilla's jealousy1 and she1 with her own motives1 enters into ,simon's present proposals4 ,eunic is accordingly invited to visit ,drusilla as one repentant and desirous of being a ,christian--,felix having meantime been filled by ,simon with the notion that ,eunic is enamored of him1 ,felix4 ,she comes with her mother to ,felix's house1 and the two are there entrapped2 but at the crisis of danger they are rescued by young ,stephen4 ,,young ,,stephen ,,and ,,felix4 ,that bland sweet weather changed to truculent ,at sunset1 and through all the winter night ,raged with wild wind and sleet of rain and hail4 ,the roofs1 the doors1 the casements1 of the house ,where ,felix and ,drusilla sojourned1 shook ,as toward dilapidation of its frame4 ,drusilla lay in terror of her life ,tossing upon her couch and could not sleep4 ,brief intervals and lulls of tempest came2 ,but images of distant danger then ,mixed with the imminent menaces of the night4 ,so with the earliest morning--furious yet ,the unabated rack of elements-- ,drusilla sent for ,simon1 rallied now ,out of his low estate1 and1 tremulous ,with weakness1 through that very weakness made ,more searchingly clairvoyant than his wont4 ,untimely roused1 and unrefreshed with sleep1 ,and shaken as still she was with panic fears1 ,the ,jewess1 ever conscious of herself ,and proudly the more conscious now before ,one whom she fain would hold her vassal1 sat ,like a queen giving audience1 well-arrayed1 ,yet artfully in speaking seemed to plead4 ,simon1 she said1 be once more my resource4 ,not once more1 but an hundred hundred times1 ,liege lady1 ,simon said1 if mine art serve4 ,but1 ,simon1 will it serve for no reward8 ,drusilla1 not without some pathos1 said2 ,yet also not without some scrutiny ,of ,simon1 which that deep dissembler bore ,flinching1 but scarcely flinching1 as he said3 ,my fortune ,i account bound up with thine4 ,yea1 ,simon1 what through thee ,i gain1 she said1 ,reckon that thou no less gainest through me4 ,as has been1 is1 our pact2 art thou content8 ,more than content1 most thankful1 ,simon said2 ,i pray thee of conditions now no more1 ,but speak thy wishes2 they shall be commands4 ,well1 faithful ,simon1 wheedling now she spoke1 ,that proud ,drusilla thou once knewest in me1 ,is abject in sheer sense of helplessness4 ,my lord is broken in spirit with lack of hope3 ,i stay him up1 as best ,i may1 to show ,the world some front of kingly boldness yet1 ,but truth is1 ,i am broken with staying him4 ,what can we do at ,rome8 ,how mend our case8 ,friends have we few1 and on the fallen thou knowest ,enemies swarm like flies on rotting flesh4 ,all is for sale at ,rome1 but who can buy ,that goes barehanded thither1 as do we8 ,thou hast the truth2 now1 ,simon1 like the rest1 ,leave us1 as rats forsake a doomd ship6 ,thou pleasest to be facetious1 ,o my queen1 ,said ,simon2 thou barehanded never art1 ,go where thou wilt1 with beauty such as thine1 ,such beauty1 and such wit to use it well4 ,with pregnant ambiguity he spoke1 ,and deeply read the features of her face4 ,those features molded nobly fair1 but now ,through their disfiguring discomposure wronged1 ,slowly regained the aspect clear and calm ,wherein the proud possessor long before ,learned that her sumptuous beauty best prevailed ,to make her sovereign of the hearts of men3 ,habit1 with reminiscence of her past ,triumphs1 usurped her mind that she forgot ,simon1 the raging storm1 her doubts and fears4 ,simon considered his mistress at his ease2 ,he saw she was not flattered by his words ,to be a childlike plaything in his hands2 ,he saw she was too haughty to resent1 ,too haughty to acknowledge by word or sign1 ,perhaps too haughty even to recognize ,in her deep mind1 much more in heart to feel1 ,hint as conveyed by him in what he said ,that in the marriage markets of the world ,such charms as hers were merchantable ware2 ,and that he ,simon abode at her command ,loyally ready to renew for her1 ,on some august occasion still to seek1 ,that intermediary office his ,which once from ,king ,azizus parted her ,to make her of the ,roman ,felix spouse4 ,drusilla in no manner made response2 ,but not less ,simon knew his wish was sped2 ,he knew the ,venus ,victrix heart in her ,was flattering to the height her sense of power4 ,he could not err by over-audacity ,in tempting this presumptuous woman's pride4 ,he ventured3 ,it were loyal service done ,thy husband1 to whom loyal service thou ,already even to sacrifice hast done ,in being his consort1 thou a queen before1 ,and he--'but lately raised from servile state1' ,simon would fain have said outright1 to ease ,the pressure of hate and scorn he felt for ,felix1 ,but knew he must no more than thus arrest ,that word upon the point of utterance caught-- ,it were ,i say1 well-weighed1 a service to him ,if thou shouldst wake the matchless power thou hast ,of kindling admiration and desire1 ,to exercise it in supreme assay ,at the tribunal where he must be judged1 ,making the judge himself thy willing thrall6 ,the subtle sorcerer watched with wary eye ,askance1 to see his mistress give at this ,some sign of pleased and startled vanity3 ,impassible placidity he saw-- ,serene1 withdrawn1 uninterrupted muse4 ,a little disconcerted1 he bode mute1 ,half glad in hope that he had not been heard4 ,when at length she1 that queenly creature1 broke1 ,herself1 with speech the growing spell of awe ,he felt upon him cast by her supreme ,beauty suspense in its august repose1 ,its silence and reserve and mystery1 ,then ,simon knew that she had been before ,him with the soaring thought of ,nero led-- ,the emperor of the world in triumph led-- ,a captive at ,drusilla's chariot wheels6 ,a flash of light invaded ,simon's mind3 ',were there not hidden here the way long sought ,to free himself from the abhorrd yoke ,of ,felix8 ,this bold woman would not stick ,at putting such an obstacle as was ,a husband such as he1 out of her path-- ,this by whatever means--a path that led ,steep to enthronement by the emperor's side4' ,thenceforward ,felix's worst foe was one ,of his own household at his table fed4 ,the emperor is a bloody man1 if true ,be all1 be half1 that they report of him-- ,drusilla thus1 as in soliloquy ,rather than in discourse to ear addressed1 ,spoke slowly--he1 the latest story goes ,sped like a shudder of horror around the world1 ,has got his mother slain1 bunglingly drowned ,by accident forsooth1 at his command-- ,accident such as asks design to chance1 ,a vessel foundering in a placid sea1 ,on a serene and starry summer night-- ,and after all not drowned1 even awkwardly1 ,but rescued to be stabbed1 with mother's cry ,first from her lips1 ',i never will believe ,this of my son6' but then with1 ',strike me here6' ,confessing that she knew it was her son6 ,and his young queen ,octavia1 silly sweet1 ,and good1 and pure1 and fair1 and amiable1 ,and in short all a ,roman emperor's spouse ,should not be--she1 they say1 leads a slave's life1 ,or worse1 amid her husband's palace scorned1 ,and happy if at last only with death ,and not with shame he rid her from his side4 ,thus speaking1 his bold mistress1 ,simon knew1 ,called up deterrent thoughts so formidable1 ,not to succumb before them shocked1 appalled1 ,but to confront them fairly1 know them well1 ,then with defiance triumph over them4 ,still1 with slant thrust at ,felix in his thought1 ,he dared a word of double-edged reply3 ,emperors1 and those however now ill-placed ,yet worthy to be empresses1 are free ,to seek their consorts1 consorts true ,i mean1 ,wherever they can find them in the world2 ,and obstacles must not be obstacles ,to them2 their pathway must somehow be cleared4 ,such1 one may all too easily judge amiss4 ,wait till thou see the emperor fitly wed6 ,that emperor-mother ,agrippina balked ,her boy too often of his wish4 ,she would ,be empress of the emperor of the world2 ,her blood in him made this impossible3 ,it was her folly and crime invoked her fall4 ,as for that young ,octavia--thou hast said4 ,poppa--so ,drusilla had resumed1 ,but ,simon rashly took the word from her3 ,poppa is a rival to be weighed ,doubtless--highborn1 and beautiful1 and deep ,in cunning1 and sure mistress of herself-- ,as art not thou too1 and full equally8-- ,but then she has a husband in the way1 ,and is she of the stuff to deal with him8 ,simon's hatred of his lord had pricked him on ,beyond the mark of prudence2 he recoiled ,from his own words before ,drusilla spoke1 ,and added1 for diversion of her thought3 ,but doubtless thou wilt need to buy thy way ,to opportunity at ,rome2 betimes ,prepare thee bribes to drop along thy path4 ,our ,gentile brethren have a pretty tale-- ,and ,simon with sarcastic humor leered-- ,of how a runner once upon a time ,won him a famous race by letting fall ,gold apples on the course too tempting bright ,not to delay his rival gathering them4 ,provide thyself with apples of gold to drop1 ,while thou art speeding featly to thy goal4 ,gold1 ,simon6 ,drusilla said1 thou teasest me1 ,too well thou knowest ,i have no gold2 our store ,was swallowed all in that devouring sea4 ,i speak in figure1 my lady1 ,simon said2 ,i mean neither literal apples nor literal gold4 ,pray1 no more parable to me1 severe ,with air resumed once more of queen enthroned1 ,drusilla answered1 and1 with only look1 ,as haughtily disdaining further word1 ,demanded that he make his meaning plain4 ,simon1 with indirection sly1 replied3 ,hast thou remarked the daily opening bloom ,of beauty in the face1 and in the form1 ,of that ,eunic1 our young countrywoman8 ,drusilla gave a fiercely jealous start-- ,on ,simon1 eagerly alert1 not lost1 ,brief though it was1 and instantly subdued2 ,it was as instantly interpreted-- ,a welcomed effect1 though calculated not4 ,she had recalled what late she overheard ,hinted from ,felix to the prisoner ,paul1 ,unless indeed thy pretty countrywoman-- ,and construed it as meaning that his eye1 ,her husband's1 had been levying on the maid4 ,women are not like men to note such things1 ,drusilla answered with a frigid air1 ,yet not as with unwillingness to learn ,what sequel there might be in ,simon's thought4 ,that sequel ,simon changed to suit the case ,he had now created unexpectedly4 ,he would torment ,drusilla's jealous mind1 ,and whet her temper to the proper edge ,for helpful quarrel with that spouse of hers ,so hateful to him4 ,women that are wives1 ,said ,simon1 well might condescend to pay ,some heed to such things6 ,but the present need ,is to have bribes in hand of the right sort ,to lavish where occasion may arise ,when we reach ,rome4 ,try if thou canst not gain ,this pretty damsel for our purposes4 ,play patroness to her1 have her at court ,here--for wherever the true queen is1 there ,is court1 though in a desert--flatter her1 ,and ply her to thy will4 ,arrived at ,rome1 ,where all is venal yet venal not all for gold1 ,offer her as likest seems to serve thy cause4 ,there is my scheme for thee2 and thy lord will1 ,i doubt not1 wink at least to forward it4 ,simon could not forbear the tempting chance ,to end1 as he began1 with what would bait ,further ,drusilla's flushed and jealous mind4 ',is ,simon playing me false in a deep game ,to serve lord ,felix at his wife's expense8' ,drusilla wondered2 'would he dare so far8 ,does he even seek to make a tool of me8 ,of me1 ,drusilla1 make a pliant tool-- ,i serve their turn forsooth against myself8 ,be it so1 and let them trow their plotting speeds6 ,i will try to be as simple as they could wish4' ,in secret with herself she wondered thus2 ,but spoke aloud with cleared and brightened look3 ,the storm1 ,i see1 which ,i had quite forgot1 ,thanks to the charms of thy society1 ,is much abated2 let us break our fast1 ,and then go thou and bid her hither to me1 ,that pretty child4 ,tell her ,i need her much1 ,for ,i am deeply sorry for my sins1 ,and think that1 with a little guide like her ,to take me by the hand and lead me right1 ,i could forsake them all and follow with her ,henceforward1 a true sister in the faith4 ,a little lure of harmless simple hope ,to win a wicked woman from her ways1 ,i think thou wilt find useful with the maid1 ,if1 as is likely1 she be loth to come4 ,felix1 ,drusilla1 and the sorcerer ,that morning at their simple meal reclined ,together in a show of amity2 ,but inwardly it was a state of feud ,or hollow truce of armed hypocrisy4 ,eating in silence with small appetite1 ,their breakfast soon they ended2 ,simon then ,withdrew and did his errand4 ,he did more2 ,for having perforce to meet the mother too1 ,whose daughter was seen ever at her side1 ,he feigned to be himself a penitent1 ,protesting his belief that he was healed1 ,unworthy to be healed1 because ,paul came ,but near him where he lay sick in his bed2 ,and this although he had wickedly refused ,to see ,paul and to suffer ,paul's hands on him4 ,he said his mistress was afraid1 as he ,was too1 of ,felix2 both of them must move ,warily1 no suspicion to excite ,in one so irritable and so violent4 ,they therefore could not ask for ,paul to come1 ,or indeed any man among ,paul's friends4 ,but ,ruth might safely come and bring the maid ,her daughter4 ,simon begged the matron would ,kindly indulge ,drusilla's preference1 ,caprice perhaps it was1 for making her child ,and not herself--senior1 and so more wise ,doubtless--her chosen guide and confidant4 ,eunic's youth had won ,drusilla's heart4 ,all ,simon's plausible art could not prevail ,to gain from ,ruth the promise he desired2 ,she only told him she would ponder well ,what he had said and do as wisest seemed4 ,but ,simon1 cheering himself that in the end ,ruth by the tempting bait held out to her1 ,the hope of doing good1 would be enticed1 ,went straight to ,felix1 and with many a wink ,of sly salacious import hinted to him ,that he1 his master1 had quite unawares1 ,with just his manly martial front and port1 ,taken captive a fair ,hebrew damsel who1 ,if all sped as he hoped1 would soon appear ,there at the mansion1 by her mother led1 ,to feed her fancy on his noble looks4 ,the simple mother1 she knew nothing of it1 ,but came to visit ,drusilla in the hope1 ,which1 naughty child6 the daughter had inspired ,of gaining my lady over to the faith4 ,should ,felix condescend to speak to her ,the maid would be all blushes1 that of course1 ,she coyly would insist she only came ,bearing her mother company to wait ,upon the mistress of the house with her4 ,felix would understand how much was meant1 ,or rather how little1 by the pretty airs ,and arch pretexts of feminine coquetry4 ,it was as ,simon hoped3 ,ruth1 overcome ,in prudence by her generous desire ,to serve a soul in need2 some natural zeal ,perhaps commingling to bring home such spoil ,of her ,eunic's winning1 a surprise ,and joy to ,paul and all the rest--so led1 ,ruth with ,eunic to ,drusilla went4 ,but not alone2 ,stephen their counsel shared1 ,and he1 deeply misdoubting of it all1 ,went with them4 ,in the inner court he stayed1 ,awaiting watchful1 eye and ear1 while they1 ,having with all obeisance been received ,and ushered inward by the instructed slave1 ,should do their errand with the mistress there4 ,he was disturbed1 when ,felix1 with a scowl ,askance at him1 crossing the court in haste ,followed the women through the selfsame door1 ,scarce shut behind them ere he entered too4 ,it was of her astute design and art1 ,drusilla's1 that her husband should have scope ,to show at full in act before her eyes ,what ground of truth there was for ,simon's hints ,against his faith to her4 ,she had hid herself1 ,not to be seen but see1 while in the room ,whither the women were ushered ,felix might1 ,were such his mind1 waylay the pretty maid1 ,proving himself what ,simon would have him be4 ,thou with thy daughter1 madam1 art well come2 ,these are dull days in ,melita for us1 ,so1 with a gross familiar air ill masked ,in mock of supercilious courtesy1 ,felix to ,ruth2 who noticed with dismay ,that servitor and servitress at once1 ,as if at silent signal unperceived1 ,vanished from presence and left her alone1 ,her and ,eunic1 no ,drusilla seen1 ,with ,felix and his bristling insolence4 ,her fears were not allayed when ,felix said ,further3 ,my lady will be glad to see ,thee1 madam1 for she dies of weariness ,in this insufferable place1 with naught ,of new to while the endless hours away2 ,but as for this our pretty little maid1 ,she shall accept my awkward offices ,to entertain her1 while her mother waits ,apart on dame ,drusilla and chats with her4 ,so saying1 he stepped to the half-open door ,and clapped his hands in summons for a slave4 ,one quickly answered1 and the master said3 ,where is thy mistress8 ,take this madam to her1 ,pointing to ,ruth4 ,ruth in a whirl of thought ,wondered1 ',are these things all a wicked wile ,of ,simon's to entrap us here8 ,does she1 ,drusilla1 too1 collude8 ,or does she know ,nothing of all8 ,or1 knowing1 does she fear ,felix1 and therefore leave us helpless thus8 ,how far may ,i abiding true to her ,involve ,drusilla in a plea to him8' ,she stood1 not stirring at the servant's beck1 ,and spoke in tones held clear and firm with will3 ,it is my daughter1 sir1 the errand has ,with dame ,drusilla4 ,she shall go to her1 ,and as the custom is between us twain ,we will together go1 for twain with us ,is one4 ,dismiss us1 then1 ,i pray1 to go4 ,thou art hard-hearted1 madam1 ,felix said2 ,one surely is enough to meet the dame ,drusilla1 and the other might solace me4 ,i pay my lady's taste a compliment ,in myself choosing for my company1 ,as seems she chose for hers1 thy daughter fair ,rather than thee2 for1 without prejudice ,to thine own comeliness1 thy daughter is1 ,thou wilt confess it1 madam1 nay1 with pride1 ,a trifle fresher in her youthful bloom4 ,eunic standing by her mother glowed ,with an indignant shame sublimely fair2 ,it kindled up her beauty into flame ,dreadful to see1 had he who saw it been ,but capable of awe from virtue shown ,lovelier with noble wrath2 ,felix admired ,only more fiercely and was not afraid4 ,a flash of movement instant changed the scene4 ,stephen1 who1 through the door left open1 caught ,felix's first ominous words of insolence1 ,had1 winging his feet with his suspicious fears1 ,fled out into the open--whither1 scarce thought-- ,yet with instinctive wish that went to ,paul4 ,he chanced on ,aristarchus walking nigh1 ,in solitary muse1 after his wont2 ,him1 with such instance as spared needless words1 ,he hurried forth to find and fetch back ,paul4 ,returning he dashed swiftly through the court1 ,avoiding who perhaps with servile sloth ,reluctant might have moved to stay him there1 ,and through the door where his ,eunic was ,defenceless in that ruthless robber's den4 ,the youth's ear1 quivering quick with jealous love1 ,snatched ,felix's last words1 his ravening eye ,seized on the splendid vision of his bride ,betrothed1 gleaming there in her loveliness ,illumined so with virtue and with shame ,beside her mother1 facing such a foe6 ,his instinct was far swifter than his thought2 ,counting not odds1 not deeming there was odds1 ,he like an arrow from a bow that twanged ,shot into place between his bride and him1 ,that spoiler1 and there stood4 ,his face he turned ,defiantly on ,felix1 lightning of scorn ,in sheafs of flashes shooting from his eyes1 ,distended his fine nostrils with disdain1 ,his right arm raised in gesture to forefend1 ,and his light frame a-quiver with repose ,of purpose to dare all and to prevail4 ,it was a duel of silence betwixt those twain1 ,that slender youth through whose translucent flesh ,blushed the bright blood of innocence and truth4 ,that burly man corrupt in every vein ,with the thick foecal currents of debauch4 ,ruth and ,eunic would not cower or cry3 ,eunic's spirit partook of that high strain ,which was her martyr father's1 and she now ,triumphed to see transfigured to more fair ,than ever with his glorious hardihood ,the youth that worthily bore her father's name ,and worthily held the empire of her heart4 ,in confidence of ,stephen which subtly too ,wrought to make him more confident of himself1 ,eunic stood confronting the event4 ,felix succumbed and was the first to speak3 ,well1 youngster1 thou hast struck an attitude6 ,what wilt thou8 ,and what doest thou here8 ,knowest not ,thou beardest thus the lion in his lair8 ,felix's air of pride and lordliness ,was ever such flatulent swell of windy words4 ,stephen some space disdained him loftily ,with dumb and blank refusal of reply2 ,then grudged him this3 ,i into the wolf's den ,enter to rend the ravin from his paw4 ,the youth thus having spoken half-way turned ,toward the two women and with instant voice1 ,low-toned yet less to be inaudible ,to ,felix than for intimate passion of love1 ,said3 ,haste1 fly6 ,i will follow as ,i may4 ,ruth with ,eunic had not reached the door ,when1 frantic to be balked of his desire1 ,felix lunged after them with lusty stride ,seeking to stay the damsel in her flight4 ,for all her fear she still forbore to cry1 ,but could not check her impulse of appeal ,to ,stephen1 and she uttered forth his name4 ,the eager agile stripling had no need ,to hear that call from his belovd2 he1 ,already at her side1 had1 with clenched fist1 ,which flashing like a scimitar came down1 ,smitten ,felix on the forearm with such might ,that for the moment it was numbed with pain1 ,and dropped as palsied from its reach for her4 ,eunic with backhanded movement quick ,seized1 as she flew following her mother forth1 ,on ,stephen's girdle behind her and drew him1 ,willingly led in that captivity1 ,to share their flight and rescue from their foe4 ,beside himself with rage at his defeat1 ,and aching still with pain from ,stephen's blow1 ,felix now stamped and shouted3 ,slaves6 ,what1 ho6 ,rascals1 where are ye all8 ,some1 trembling1 came1 ,but ere their master could possess his wits ,to give them orders1 ,paul before him stood4 ,worse crazed at that sight1 ,felix fiercely cried3 ,him6 ,him6 ,are ye all blind8 ,seize him1 ,i say6 ,betwixt their terror of ,felix and their awe ,of ,paul1 august in his unmovd calm ,and venerable with virtue and with age1 ,well-known to them besides as one who wrought ,with other power than mortal1 the poor slaves ,hung helpless to perform their master's hest4 ,these do not need to seize me1 here ,i am1 ,said ,paul1 and of no mind to fly2 ,i came ,hastily summoned as to some distress ,here1 what ,i know not1 that ,i might relieve4 ,smite him upon the mouth1 ,felix broke forth1 ,and make him feel distress to need relief6 ,the freedman's truculence waxed with every word1 ,and swaggering forward he his hand upraised ,as if himself to strike the blow he bade2 ,when1 with a maniple of soldiers armed ,accompanied1 ,julius the centurion stood ,abruptly at the door4 ,stephen with his charge ,had met the band of soldiers on their way ,just as1 with circumspection looking back1 ,he saw ,paul1 by a different path arrived1 ,and earlier1 enter at ,felix's abode4 ,he quickly acted on a counsel new4 ,for1 with a farewell of1 ,now ye are safe1 ,yet hie ye to the uttermost remove ,from ,felix1 to the women spoken1 he ,turning walked back with ,julius who his pace ,now slacked to listen while the stripling told ,what had befallen and how he feared for ,paul ,imperilled in that violent house alone4 ,come in good time1 however hither called1 ,felix to ,julius said1 with such a tone ,as seemed to ask how he was thither called4 ,thy servant ,syrus begged that ,i would come1 ,said ,julius1 for the safety of thy house ,endangered by two women and a boy1 ,who had found entrance and were threatening thee4 ,in truth1 that sly young slave of ,felix's-- ,for reason ill-affected toward his lord1 ,as much enamored of the ,christian folk ,for their fair manners1 and the comely looks ,of some of them1 and the beneficent ,working of wonders seen or heard from ,paul-- ,had summoned ,julius in the true behoof ,of ,ruth with her ,eunic and of ,stephen2 ,this1 shrewdly under guise of service shown ,his master4 ,julius understood the guile ,and humored it1 while ,felix's thick wits ,spread ample cover to render ,syrus safe4 ,of course1 so ,julius added1 it had not seemed ,needful to come1 but that ,i also heard ,a prisoner of my charge would here be found1 ,for whose safe keeping ,i am answerable4 ,then glancing in a kindly neutral way ,at ,stephen1 he1 with show of grave rebuke ,that could not wholly hide his lively sense ,of whimsical humor in the part he played ,as mediator in such case1 went on3 ,this ,hebrew youth confesses that1 in haste ,of spirit1 he offered thee some disrespect4 ,with language purposely made light and vague ,thus the centurion glozed ,stephen's offence1 ,discreetly shunning to let ,felix know ,that he knew from the offender's own report ,how1 for good cause1 as to a happy end1 ,the indignant youth inflicted on him there ,the shame and anguish of that timely blow4 ,what wilt thou1 my lord ,felix1 ,julius asked1 ,wilt thou forgive the lad outright8 ,or pleasest ,thou rather ,i condignly deal with him8 ,it was astutely so proposed1 to save ,appearances to ,felix and for him4 ,gross-witted as he was1 he yet was proud1 ,and such end of the incident appeared ,at once some homage to his dignity ,and an escape unhoped from threatened shame4 ,he condescended loftily to leave ,the case of ,stephen in the centurion's hands2 ,and the centurion presently retired ,with ,paul and ,stephen both4 ,stephen he bade ,see to it that he never thenceforth act ,less worthily of himself than he that day ,had done1 and with no other reprimand ,dismissed him to rejoin his company4 ,as for ,drusilla1 she now had her proof2 ,and seeing his purpose prosper ,simon was glad4 ,,book ,,xvi4 ,,interlude ,,of ,,krishna4 ,publius1 the governor of the island1 who in gratitude to ,paul for the healing of his father has opened his house to the ,christians for their meetings1 now expresses1 through ,sergius ,paulus1 his guest1 a wish to hear himself the story that ,mary ,magdalen is relating4 ,the company accordingly assemble in his house1 and ,publius is in courtesy asked to act as a kind of master of the feast4 ,he accepts the part1 and discharges it with much urbane demonstrativeness4 ,interrupting ,mary at one point of her story with exclamations of surprise and pleasure1 he proposes to ,krishna that he offset what has just been told with something parallel from the life of his master ,buddha4 ,krishna reluctantly complies1 when1 after some comment following from ,paul1 ,mary resumes her narrative4 ,,interlude ,,of ,,krishna4 ,for many following days in ,melita ,there was no season of hospitality ,to man from ,nature under open sky1 ,genial for ease and comfort out of doors4 ,but the fair spacious halls of ,publius ,stood smiling ever ready to entertain ,resort of ,paul or any dear to ,paul ,whether for social worship in prayer and psalm1 ,with hearing of ,paul discourse of things divine1 ,or for communion sweet of friend and friend4 ,here presently were gathered yet again ,the company that had with one accord ,already twice assembled to give ear ,to ,mary ,magdalen while she told ,her story still unfinished of the ,lord4 ,publius1 as ,roman to his ,roman peer-- ,and ,roman peer so versed in all the arts ,and all the accomplishments urbane that make ,amenity in companionship--had said ,to ,sergius ,paulus 7likewise1 for his sake1 ,to ,krishna71 ,pray thee1 honor thou my house1 ,and be content1 abide with me a guest4 ,now ,sergius had to ,publius rehearsed ,the things that ,mary those two afternoons ,recounted1 and the ,roman lord would fain ,hear from her lips the rest4 ,so he was there-- ,guest in a sort1 while host1 at his own hearth-- ,and ,sergius ,paulus said3 ,o ,publius1 thou-- ,most welcome1 as thou makest us welcome here-- ,shalt1 so it please thee1 us all it will please1 ,be the feast-master in the present feast ,of story and of audience4 ,krishna here-- ,and courteous toward the ,indian ,sergius bowed-- ,has also a story to tell us of his lord4 ,whether with alternation and relief ,between our two historians1 or in course1 ,till one have finished1 be the order best1 ,judge thou for all1 and all will grateful be4 ,let ,mary ,magdalen then go on1 ,said ,publius1 if she will1 from where she ceased ,at the last audience2 and he turned to her ,with1 ,sergius has most kindly made me know ,so far thy story1 madam1 with the rest ,of this good company4 ,but1 with thy peace1 ,and with the peace of ,krishna and of all1 ,i will upon occasion interrupt-- ,for haply the occasion may arise-- ,to ask what contrast or what parallel ,to this or that of ,jesus1 ,buddha yields4 ,so ,mary1 with some heightened flush like shame ,to speak in this new place and presence1 yet ,sedately like herself and with a charm ,already round her ambient from the pure1 ,the perfect1 the accomplished womanhood ,that hers was1 purged of self1 charm by all felt ,at once ere her beginning1 thus began3 ,i think that ,i was saying1 as my words ,i stayed at our last gathering on the shore1 ,how little like a tragedy so nigh ,it looked to us1 when we beheld the throngs ,strewing ,christ's way before him with their robes ,flung down1 and with green branches of the palm1 ,and shouting their hosannas to ,his name4 ,but ,jesus was not blinded as were we6 ,he1 on the brink of the descent arrived ,steep from the ,mount of ,olives leading down1 ,beheld the holy city with its sheen ,of splendor from the temple roofs and walls1 ,and1 far removed from glorying at the sight ,as king might welcomed to his capital1 ,wept over it1 with much-amazing tears1 ,and cried3 ',hadst thou but known1 but known1 even thou1 ,yea1 even in this thy day but known the things ,that to thy peace belong6 ,but they are hid ,now from thine eyes4 ,for days will come on thee--' ,and then such dreadful days he told us of-- ,days which our holy apostles think are nigh1 ,whence their ',maranatha6' so often heard1 ,reminder watchword of the ,lord at hand1 ,they solemnly adjuring by the days ,reserved for our ,jerusalem1 a wrath ,to come upon her to the uttermost ,then when ,he1 with the angels of ,his power1 ,and as the lightning shineth suddenly ,ablaze from one end to the other of heaven1 ,shall back return in clouds to execute ,his judgment on the city that slew ,him6 ,but wherefore1 the centurion asked once more1 ,and ,mary with a loyal look toward him ,of honor for his kindly courtesy ,that day and ever bountiful to them-- ,look too betokening welcome of his return ,to share the audience of her tale again ,late interrupted by that message brought ,seeming to be of sinister import-- ,mary1 with such a meaning so conveyed1 ,paused1 while the friendly ,roman plied his quest3 ,but wherefore did ,jerusalem desire ,to slay one innocent of crime like him8 ,some reason of state ,i dared to guess there was1 ,but what the reason of state1 thou didst not tell1 ,turning to ,paul he said1 and ,paul replied3 ,the ,jewish rulers of the people said3 ',this ,jesus1 if we let him thus alone1 ,will draw all men to follow after him2 ,the ,romans then will come and take away ,alike this city which belongs to us1 ,yea1 and the nation over which we rule4' ,the rescued remnant of authority ,wielded by the chief priests and ,pharisees ,over our nation under ,roman sway1 ,this still was dear to them and this they feared ,to forfeit if the fame of ,jesus grew4 ,and grow it did surpassing even their fears1 ,mary resumed1 at silent sign from ,paul2 ,for but a little while before1 and nigh ,jerusalem1 a height of miracle ,jesus had wrought4 ,one four days dead1 nay1 one ,already four days in his sepulcher1 ,our ,lord1 with only ',lazarus1 come forth6'-- ,commanded in loud voice before the tomb-- ,summoned to life again4 ,the dead came forth ,bound hand and foot with grave-clothes1 and his head ,bound with a napkin round about--no pause1 ,not of an instant1 in obeying that word1 ,prevention none felt from impediment4 ,abrupt descent then from such miracle ,to the plain level of sobering commonplace4 ,for he whom ,jesus from the dead could call ,to leave his tomb1 to stand upright1 to walk1 ,unconscious of obstruction1 swathed about ,with grave-clothes though he was1 must be released ,by others from his bonds2 the ,master said ,to those near by1 ',loose him and let him go4' ,while ,mary told these things1 a sense diffused ,of something felt by all the ,christians there1 ,felt1 but acknowledged not in word or sign1 ,signalled itself despite to all the rest2 ,and through a kind of dumb intelligence ,it came that ,publius1 ,julius1 and that deep ,discerning ,indian1 ,krishna1 with one mind ,to all1 unspoken1 fixed inquiring gaze ,on ,rachel and on ,stephen1 who their hands ,meantime had silently1 unconsciously1 ,with simultaneous mutual movement clasped1 ,as if in token of some memory ,which they that moment felt between them rise1 ,some sacred memory1 some undying love4 ,then ,mary1 with the happy instinct hers ,of what was fitting to be said1 and when1 ,and what more fitting to be left unsaid1 ,and how to say all1 or how silent be1 ,assuming1 with a look of deference ,first toward the twain1 their present leave to speak-- ,granted to her as so much trusted in ,for wisdom1 and for love in wisdom poised-- ,said1 with a certain courtesy implied ,for ,publius as the master of the feast1 ,and for the others needing to be told3 ,that ,lazarus1 raised by ,jesus from the dead1 ,is to the ,christians of this company ,a name the dearer that to two of us ,he is the dearest memory of their lives4 ,for after he had risen from the dead ,at ,jesus' call he lived his human life ,as he before had done1 till in due time ,a husband and a father he became4 ,but ,rachel lives in honored widowhood1 ,as1 with her1 half in orphanhood lives ,stephen1 ,because he after fell asleep in ,christ ,to be waked only when ,christ comes again4 ,a tender pause succeeded1 which all filled ,with solemn1 some with wondering1 thought2 and then1 ,tempered1 beyond his will or consciousness1 ,to a contagious mood of sympathy1 ,publius most gently as feast-master spoke3 ,the height of miracle well calledst thou ,such summoning of the dead to life again2 ,for greater wonder were not possible4 ,to see it1 as thou sawest it1 was a gift ,indeed from the supernal powers2 next is1 ,to have it in report of one who saw it2 ,and then1 for attestation of thy word1 ,where attestation surely need was none ,yet serving for attestation1 to behold ,here those who knew the dead man raised to life ,as husband and as father--all makes seem ,the story like reality itself4 ,and now1 to ,krishna turning1 ,publius said3 ,o ,krishna1 pray from thee a parallel4 ,what comparable wonder wilt thou show ,that thou hast seen thy master ,buddha work8 ,the countenance fell to ,krishna hearing this1 ,but quickly himself recovering he replied ,i am not able out of all ,i know ,concerning ,buddha aught this day to tell ,as one that saw and heard2 ,i never saw1 ,i never heard1 lord ,buddha act or speak4 ,then from report that some eye-witness gave ,thee1 speak and tell us what thou wilt1 and we ,will be therewith content--so ,publius1 dashed ,a little from his lively hope1 but fain ,to ease the discomposure of his guest4 ,but ,krishna1 in no wise more cheerful1 said3 ,nor from eye-witness have ,i aught received ,that my lord ,buddha either said or did3 ,he lived and passed five hundred years ago4 ,but doubtless some memorials1 ,publius said1 ,were written by eye-witnesses of him1 ,while he still lived1 or close upon his death1 ,to keep so dear a memory alive ,and certify it to all aftertime4 ,so1 out of such memorials known to thee1 ,fresh still1 though old five hundred years1 because ,then written when the images were fresh1 ,imprinted on the writer's mind of things ,he either saw or heard himself from ,buddha-- ,strange virtue has eye-witness testimony ,in simultaneous records of the time ,to stay1 though old1 perennially young-- ,i say1 then1 out of such memorials stored ,and treasured up in mind to thee speak thou1 ,and it shall be to us as if thou hadst seen4 ,publius1 with all sincerity of aim ,to hearten ,krishna and make most the worth ,of that which he1 although eye-witness not1 ,nor yet reporter from eye-witness known1 ,should proffer to that hospitality ,of audience touching his dear master ,buddh1 ,had unawares confused him more and more4 ,for the first time the ,indian felt give way ,a little1 melting underneath his feet1 ,his standing-ground of settled certitude3 ',was it all quicksand8 ,nothing there of rock8' ,but he made answer3 ,o my courteous host1 ,all is uncertain1 for tradition all1 ,concerning times1 and order of events4 ,indeed1 we ,indians care not for these things1 ,but trust full easily1 or1 not trusting1 yet ,rest as if trusting1 in much unconcern ,whether that which we learn be wholly true1 ,or partly not2 and yet ,i have heard it said ,that1 close upon the passing of the ,buddh1 ,a council of five hundred faithful met ,who said together in accord complete-- ,no sentence varying1 nay1 no syllable-- ,the mighty mass of all the ,exalted ,one's ,instructions2 but no writing then was made1 ,nor again afterward an hundred years1 ,when such rehearsal came a second time4 ,so1 truth to say1 where all is doubt--for me1 ,i fear there was1 for half five hundred years ,after he died1 no record in writing made ,of what our master ,buddha wrought and taught4 ,save for those synods of rehearsal met1 ,that precious memory lived precariously1 ,as himself lived1 the master1 vagabond ,and mendicant from loyal mouth to mouth4 ,but such tradition was too vital to die2 ,compact of only vocal breath1 it still ,persisted and would still for aye persist ,though never at all in written record sheathed4 ,but the fourth part of a millennium ,after lord ,buddha died1 a synod sat ,of his discreet disciples1 who decreed ,that then at least a record should be framed ,in writing of the master's deeds and words4 ,most fit1 said ,publius1 who to complaisance1 ,his impulse and his habit1 now adjoined ,a certain willingness not unamiable ,to magnify the twofold part he played ,as host and as symposiarch1 and make cheer ,all that he could for ,krishna2 aye1 most fit2 ,and doubtless they were men1 that synod1 famed ,for wisdom and for virtue2 name them thou1 ,or at least some1 the chief1 that we may here ,honor them for their worth4 ,but ,krishna said 7,for1 by some sense of disadvantage stung1 ,he took reprisals of his gentle sort73 ,what if ,i could not name them8 ,what if they1 ,concerned less to survive themselves in fame1 ,mere empty wraiths of sound to mortal ears ,in futile issues of dissolving breath1 ,repeated echoes of unmeaning names-- ,what if1 ,i say1 concerned less so to be ,vainly themselves remembered for a day ,than to keep living for the use of men ,the saving truths their master ,buddha taught1 ,those saints and sages of the elder time ,let themselves perish quite from human thought8 ,but ,publius interposed1 insisting1 fain ,to show some ground of reason in his mind1 ,beyond mere curiosity for words1 ,why he desired to know those ancient names4 ,yet were it some support1 he said1 to faith ,in those same saving truths as truly saved ,themselves for men1 after so long a term ,of vagabondage 7to take up thy word71 ,of vagabondage and of mendicancy-- ,the fourth part of a thousand years consumed ,in flying forward hither from mouth to mouth-- ,so far1 uncertain of his way1 he groped2 ,bethinking then himself of one more chance1 ,that might be1 of the proof he sought1 he said3 ,and still1 ,o ,krishna1 if those nameless ones1 ,deserving well to be not nameless1 nay1 ,of far-renownd name2 nor less1 but more1 ,deserving that they waived their own desert2 ,if these--nobly not mindful whether they ,remembered or forgotten were of men1 ,yet heedful not to let the coming time ,fail of the truth that they themselves had found ,so dear1 or dwell in any needless doubt ,of its just phrase--committed at the last ,the task of fixing it in written form ,to some illustrious man who would consent ,to forego for himself his choice of being ,obscure1 unknown to aftertime1 and lend ,the great weight of his name to the result1 ,for satisfaction to inquiring souls-- ,why1 that were much1 indeed perhaps enough1 ,and ,i before required beyond my right4 ,demand upon demand sincerely so ,urged by the genial host upon his guest ,as if urbane concessions granted him1 ,involved the patient ,indian more and more4 ,pressed beyond even his measure now at length1 ,he brooked no longer to allow the toils ,to multiply about him which he felt ,were fast entangling him to helplessness4 ,he boldly spoke to disengage himself3 ,we of the ,east1 ,o ,publius1 are not such ,as you are of the ,west4 ,we do not count ,the years as you do1 fixing fast our dates4 ,we live content a kind of timeless life ,that moves continuous on from age to age ,unreckoned4 ,countless generations come ,and go1 and come and go1 like forest leaves ,from year to year1 and no one takes account ,of those more than of these4 ,why should we8 ,those1 ,as these1 are ever to each other like1 ,harvest and harvest endlessly the same4 ,what profit were there in a history1 ,what history indeed were possible1 ,of either leaves or men8 ,let leaves and men ,together to oblivion go2 be sure ,there will not fail to follow leaves and men ,to fill the places never vacant left4 ,but then we ,easterns are yet otherwise ,different from you2 for we remember more4 ,because we do not write our records down1 ,we all the better keep them safe in mind4 ,doubtless we mix them much with fantasy3 ,we are not nice to draw a certain line ,between what we remember and what dream4 ,all is as dream to us1 for we ourselves ,are dream1 and oft imagination wakes ,where memory sleeps2 but1 so the form be full1 ,somehow1 somewhence1 it matters naught to us ,whether from fact it be1 remembered right1 ,or half from fancy fitted to the fact4 ,our ,buddha is the fair ideal man1 ,exemplar of the human possible4 ,we cannot dream him fairer than he is1 ,or was--for he perhaps is not--and so ,we fling the rein down on our fancy's neck ,and let her freely take her own wise way4 ,i will not warrant you the truth of it1 ,that is1 the insignificant truth of fact1 ,mere fact1 but if the deeper truth of fit ,and fair will answer you1 ,i can relate ,the story of one miracle of ,buddh1 ,the sole one of the ,sutta ,pitaka1 ,that chiefest treasure of our sacred texts4 ,this1 though to raising of the dead no match1 ,yet1 to my mind1 is meet and memorable1 ,for that therewith a lovely word is joined ,of tuneful teaching from the master's lips4 ,let us have both1 the wonder and the word1 ,said ,publius1 and the ,indian thus complied3 ',the ,blessd to the sacred ,ganges came ,and found the stream an overflowing flood4 ,the others looked for boats and rafts to cross1 ,or else wove wicker into basket floats2 ,but he1 as quickly as a strong man forth ,would stretch his arm1 or his arm being stretched ,would bring it back1 so quickly at his wish1 ,had changed the hither for the thither side4 ,there standing1 he the wicker-weavers saw1 ,and thus broke forth in parable and song3 ,they who traverse the ocean of desire1 ,building themselves a causeway firm and good ,across the quaking quagmires1 quicksands1 pools1 ,of ignorance1 of delusion1 and of lust1 ,whilst the vain world its wicker baskets weaves-- ,these are the wise1 and these the saved indeed4' ,a pang of suffering love and loving ruth1 ,for ,buddha himself1 long quit of earthly strife1 ,but more for ,buddha's disciple present there1 ,shot through the heart of ,paul hearing these things4 ,he sighed in spirit heavily1 but said1 ,when ,publius seemed to seek a word from him3 ,if ,i have taken the ,buddha's sense aright1 ,he means that they the happy are and wise ,who find a means of ceasing from desire ,and entering into passionless repose1 ,a state from death itself scarce different4 ,contrariwise taught ,jesus3 ',blessd they ,that hunger and that thirst2' that fan desire ,to all-consuming flame of appetite-- ,but it must be for righteousness they pant4 ,not from desire1 but from impure desire1 ,to cease--that is salvation2 and we best ,cease from impure desire when we to flame ,the whitest fan desire for all things true1 ,for all things honorable1 and all things just1 ,for all things pure1 and all things lovely1 all ,of good report1 and worthy human praise4 ,passion for these things1 being pure passion1 burns ,the impure passion out3 but passion such ,is kindled only at the altar fire ,of the eternal ,god's white holiness4 ,no ,god find ,i in all the ,buddha's thought-- ,a ghastly gap of void and nothingness1 ,o ,krishna1 to the orphaned human heart ,that aches with longing and with loneliness1 ,a weanling infant left forlorn of ,god1 ,and1 ',o1 that ,i might find ,him6' ceaseless cries ,in yearnings that will not be pacified1 ,fatherless in a dreadful universe6 ,i would thy ,buddha had felt after ,god1 ,and haply found ,him1 or been found of ,him6 ,i wonder if1 not knowing it1 he did6 ,sadly ,i wonder when of this ,i think1 ,that he who comes to ,god must needs believe ,god is1 and a rewarder is of such ,as diligently seek ,him--such alone4 ,but may one seek ,god unawares8 ,with hope ,i wonder1 when ,i think again of ,him1 ,the ,light that lighteth every soul of man ,that anywhere is born into the world4 ,o ,christ1 ,thou ,brightness of the ,father's glory1 ,immanuel1 ,god with us1 the ,son of ,man1 ,the ,son of ,god1 ,god ,himself manifest ,on earth to us1 ,redeemer1 ,brother1 ,lord6 ,the strain of such ascription bursting forth ,unbidden1 and unboundedly intense ,in tone1 from the great heart of ,paul surcharged ,with passion of devotion to his ,lord ,and with vicarious travailing desire ,to save men1 wrought in all who heard an awe ,of immanent ,god4 ,but ,krishna to the quick ,was touched with tenderness toward ,paul to hear ,paul's tenderness toward ,buddha1 far removed ,although it were from reverence like his own4 ,to ,publius there seemed no fitting thing ,for modulation to the mood from ,paul1 ,save to let ,mary now resume the word4 ,she said3 ,after the raising from the dead ,of ,lazarus1 we disciples of the ,lord ,ought not to have been astonished or dismayed ,at anything that in ,his wisdom ,he1 ,his wisdom and ,his power1 might either do ,or suffer to be done4 ,but we were blind1 ,and it did seem to us so violent1 ,so opposite to all that should have been1 ,when ,he1 that ,lord of life and glory1 let ,the soldiers take him prisoner4 ,at first ,indeed1 when ,he stood forth and said to them1 ',whom seek ye8' and they1 ignorant1 said to ,him1 ',jesus of ,nazareth1' and thereupon ,he answered1 ',i am he1' they1 at that word ,from ,him1 majestically spoken more ,than they could bear to hear and stand upright1 ,went backward and fell prostrate on the ground4 ,this1 as ,i think1 was not so much against ,those who thus suffered as for us who saw-- ,to reassure our faith that naught then done ,was done without ,his sovereign sufferance1 who ,such things could1 then even1 and so easily1 work4 ,but ,i have told now what ,i did not see1 ,for it was midnight when this came to pass-- ,deep in the garden of ,gethsemane1 ,a little paradise of olive trees ,where oft the ,master loved to be retired2 ,a few disciples only were with ,him there1 ,his chosen apostles2 and not all of these1 ,for one of them a little while before ,had gone out from among them--well foreknown ,by ,jesus wherefore1 it was to betray ,his ,lord and ,master to ,his enemies6 ,judas1 the name of this one was1 and he ,had given it for a sign to those that sought ,to lay hands on our ,master1 ',whomsoever ,i kiss1 that same is ,he2 make sure of ,him4' ,so ,judas1 as in all sweet loyalty1 ,came up to ,jesus with his proffered kiss ,of salutation2 but the ,lord would not ,receive it1 till ,he had first made known to all ,his understanding of its treachery3 ',judas1' ,he said1 'betrayest thou with a kiss ,the ,son of ,man8' ,when ,judas had his sign ,given1 he fell back among the band he had brought4 ,then was it that the ,lord asked them1 not yet ,enough assured or haply stunned with fear1 ',whom seek ye8' and declared ,himself to them4 ,so ,judas was of those who prostrate fell ,recoiled before the glory of the ,lord ,flashing in sudden glimpse from out the shame ,like lightning disimprisoned from a cloud-- ,foretasted retribution of his crime6 ,thus much not as eye-witness ,i relate1 ,but having heard it from eye-witnesses ,so many and so close upon the time ,that half it seems as if myself had seen it4 ,i saw when1 with the breaking of the dawn1 ,after a night to ,jesus of such strain ,and pain in agony and bloody sweat1 ,and sorrow of heart for human traitorhood1 ,and disappointment in his hopes from friends1 ,and dreadful bodings of the doom so nigh1 ,and being rudely hustled to and fro ,between one jurisdiction and another1 ,everywhere treated with all contumely ,both of accusing and reviling word ,and of gross act in blasphemous affront ,to the image of ,god in man--were ,he but man6-- ,but ,he being ,god1 conceive the blasphemy ,of spitting in that heavenly human face ,divine1 and smiting ,him in mockery1 ,blindfolded not to see whence came the blow1 ,then bidden prophesy1 ',who struck thee1 ,christ8' 7,the very slaves there smote ,him with their hands7-- ,i say that after such a night to ,him ,who condescended to be human1 ,god ,although ,he was1 and felt all human woe1 ,i saw when1 morning having broken1 they ,led ,jesus last to ,pilate in his hall4 ,there ,he stood lamblike1 so pathetical ,in ,his meek majesty ,i could have wept ,for heart-break in sheer pity of ,his state1 ,but that the fountain was dried up in me ,of blessd tears1 and ,i consumed myself ,in anguish that fed on my soul like fire4 ,the anguish whereof ,mary spoke that fed ,so like an inward fire upon her soul1 ,seemed to surge back on her in memory2 ,and it was after strong recoil subdued ,that she resumed to say3 ,ye will not ask ,that ,i tell all again1 how shame on shame ,was wreaked upon my ,lord1 until no more ,was possible from men4 ,pilate himself 7,now ,pilate was the ,roman governor7 ,pilate himself1 ,i think1 was moved to pity1 ,though1 paltering1 he with cruel weakness bade ,scourge that sweet human flesh and temple of ,god6 ,perhaps he thought1 ',this will content his foes4' ,so having done1 he1 issuing from his hall1 ,brought ,jesus forth before the multitude ,wearing upon ,his brow a crown of thorns ,the soldiers had in mockery plaited ,him1 ,and over his bruised form the purple robe4 ',behold the man6' said ,pilate to the ,jews2 ,i think he must have had his hope to meet ,relenting on the part of that wild mob ,when they saw ,jesus in ,his piteous plight4 ,bloodthirsty as they were1 perhaps they would1 ,with the blood streaming from ,his wounded brows1 ,they knowing besides how underneath the robe ,mock-kingly that he wore the blood coursed down ,the trenches opened by the cutting lash--,with so much blood they might be satisfied4 ,nay1 so much blood but maddened them for more4 ',behold the man6' said ,pilate1 and ,i looked4 ,i knew that ,he was more than man1 and never ,did ,he the human measure more surpass1 ,yet man ,he was1 and so divinely man6 ,the ,god in ,him1 apparent like the sun ,to me1 made ,him not less1 more rather1 man4 ,i worshipped ,him1 and yet ,i pitied ,him6 ,i never pitied other half so much4 ,he was so exquisitely human6 ,our ,little capacity of suffering pain1 ,whether of spirit or of flesh1 in ,him ,seemed to be carried to unmeasured heights4 ,what form of anguish ours did ,he not feel8 ,yea1 sorrow for sin not ,his2 ',which one of you1' ,he asked once1 and no hearer made reply1 ',which one of you convinceth ,me of sin8' ,sinless ,he was1 nor ever felt remorse1 ,that worm which dieth not prey on ,his soul4 ,yet somehow ,he became so one with us ,he felt our sin as if it were ,his own1 ,his own to bear in undeservd woe ,suffered on our behalf1 worse than remorse4 ,all this ,i blindly felt seeing ,him there4 ,he did not mail ,him proof with hero pride ,to suffer as if ,he suffered not1 and so ,wrest their vain triumph from ,his enemies4 ,they saw ,him suffer more than any man1 ,not quailing indeed1 yet hardening not ,himself4 ',never man spake like this man1' some one said2 ,i say1 suffered man never so as ,he4 ,how my heart bled for ,him when ,pilate spoke ,those words1 ',behold the man6' ,and ,pilate too1 ,i pitied him4 ,pity1 with worship blent ,into one overmastering passion1 poured ,out of my heart toward ,jesus2 but toward him1 ,pilate1 that weak1 that wicked1 went instead ,pity with horror1 doubtful which was more4 ,forgive me that ,i mix myself with this4 ,indeed ,i could not tell you all in all ,my story1 not another's1 of the ,lord1 ,unless1 besides the things ,i saw or heard1 ,i told you also how they seemed to me1 ,what thoughts1 what feelings started in my breast4 ,the purged high passion with which ,mary spoke1 ,calm though she kept with costly self-command1 ,betrayed itself to ,paul observing her4 ,he knew the tension of remembered pain1 ,imagined with such vividness of recall ,that well-nigh ,mary suffered it all afresh1 ,had touched already the extremest bound ,of what that spirit1 in its shaken shrine ,of frail flesh quivering so1 could safely bear4 ,he spoke and said3 ,o ,publius1 there is much ,remaining still for ,mary to recite ,of the last things to ,jesus here on earth1 ,both ,his obedience faithful unto death1 ,and ,his victorious rising from the grave4 ,so thou1 feast-master of the hour1 consent1 ,let us--thine own urbane feast-mastership ,resumed then--meet1 if ,god will1 yet once more ,to hear this solemn history to the end4 ,such word from ,paul was mastership transferred ,to him2 and ,publius promptly1 without sense ,of yielding1 yielded and broke up the feast4 ,,book ,,xvii4 ,,the ,,story ,,of ,,the ,,cross4 ,when the company next assemble1 ,publius greets them with a feast spread in his house4 ,this gives occasion for his explaining the customs of his nation in the matter of recognizing various divinities at feasts4 ,paul replies1 setting forth the ,christian doctrine on this point4 ,mary1 in due time about to begin her narrative1 is seized with a sudden faintness1 which however soon yielding to restoratives supplied by ,ruth1 she goes on and relates the incidents of the crucifixion of ,jesus4 ,,the ,,story ,,of ,,the ,,cross4 ',feast-master1' ye were pleased to call me1 friends3 ,so in a cheerful humor ,publius spoke1 ,bright-hearted welcome radiant on his face ,as vibrant in his brisk and cordial tones1 ,then when by concert after interval-- ,their appetite the keener from suspense-- ,the selfsame company again were met ,under his ample roof to hear the rest ,what ,mary1 or what ,krishna1 more might tell4 ,they found the mansion furnished as for feast4 ,garlands of fresh leaf and of fragrant flower ,hung everywhere about and frolic laughed ,a momentary mimicry of spring4 ,a fountain playing in the court without ,shot up its curving column to the sun2 ,he caught the shattered capital in air1 ,and1 kindling every crystal water-drop ,of all the circling shower to which it turned ,into a jewel1 sent the largess down1 ,shifting as in a shaken kaleidoscope ,from form to form of light and rainbow hue-- ,a glittering evanescence passing price1 ,sard1 topaz1 sapphire1 opal1 diamond-stone1 ,emerald and ruby1 pearl and amethyst4 ,that fountain1 to the eye refection such1 ,plashed gentle-murmuring music in the ear4 ,couches and chairs about the board disposed ,awaited4 ,the guests' feet1 as they reclined1 ,or sat--the woman sat1 the men reclined-- ,were duly washed and wiped after the wont ,of homage in those times and in those climes ,accorded ever to the honored guest4 ,while this was passing1 the complacent host1 ,not in quite unpremeditated words ,though from his heart1 welcomed his guests and said3 ',feast-master' ye were pleased to call me late ,when of your own ye furnished forth the feast1 ,invisible viands1 yet of savor rare4 ,then ,i was helpless1 taken by surprise1 ,and could do nothing to deserve my name4 ,if1 by your grace1 ,i must feast-master be1 ,let me in some sort be feast-maker too4 ,forewarned to-day1 ,i venture to assume ,leave of your goodness1 and provide this cheer2 ,too obvious to the sight and touch and taste ,to be as delicate as yours1 yet fruit ,of hospitality sincere4 ,partake1 ,i pray you1 freely1 and commend the food4 ,with meat and drink refreshed1 we shall not less1 ,more rather1 relish what of nobler sort ,may follow1 entertainment to the mind4 ,paul answering with a grave sweet courtesy ,for all attuned that genial atmosphere ,to a chaste spirit of something finer yet ,than genial1 which prepared him easy way ,to saying3 ,and now1 ,o ,publius1 unto ,god ,most ,high1 who gave thee what thou givest us1 ,and gave thee likewise thy good will to give1 ,that ,god in whom we live and move and have ,our being1 who of one blood made us all1 ,gentile and ,jew together1 and whose ,son ,christ ,jesus died that we might be redeemed ,to fellow-sonship with ,himself to ,god-- ,let us to ,god1 ,all-giver1 render thanks ,for these his gifts1 and therewithal for that1 ,his gift unspeakable in ,christ ,his ,son4 ,so1 ,publius assenting with bowed head ,and complaisance unspoken1 ,paul gave thanks4 ,oblation of the lips in chosen words1 ,warm from the heart no doubt yet only words1 ,o ,paul1 thou offeredst to the powers unseen ,above us1 ,publius said soon after1 while ,the equal feast they shared2 as if one ,god ,alone thou worshippedst1 ,all-giver named ,by thee3 but we have gods and goddesses ,diverse in name and office1 unto whom ,we offer gift and sacrifice diverse ,according as may seem diversely meet4 ,apollo is the regent of the sun1 ,of the moon1 ,cynthia with her crescent bow2 ,pomona is our patroness of fruits1 ,while ,flora rules the gentle realm of flowers1 ,and mother ,ceres yields us corn and oil4 ,jupiter gives us weather1 and he broods ,in fecund incubation from the skies ,over the earth to quicken all that grows ,with moisture2 but he sometimes frowns in cloud ,not kindly1 and hurtles down the thunderbolt4 ,know it was ,neptune that stirred up the sea ,so1 in that insurrection and revolt ,against you late1 and stranded you forlorn1 ,happy for me and mine6 upon this isle2 ,for ,neptune is the sovereign of the wave4 ,those winds that blew meantime were breath in blast ,puffed from the cheeks of olus who holds ,the invisible dominion of the air4 ,the world is peopled dense with deities ,whom well to worship all1 is no light task4 ,we build them temples1 and on altars there ,pour them out rivers of blood from victims slain2 ,blood is the favorite drink to most of them4 ,the victims' flesh we offer them for food3 ,they do not eat it2 so we eat it for them4 ,for instance now1 these meats purveyed for you ,ere going to the shambles to be sold1 ,were duly each presented to some god3 ,so we may gratify our appetite1 ,and feel that we are worshipping the while4 ,but ,bacchus is our hospitable god3 ,a big1 bluff1 honest face we figure him1 ,bloodthirsty not1 but fond of festal cheer4 ,him we best please by drinking of his gift1 ,not blood of beast but generous blood of grape1 ,and spending a libation of the same1 ,tribute to him1 the end of every feast4 ,this spring and flow of talk idolatrous1 ,uncertain how much serious and how much ,a play of skeptic humor half ashamed1 ,was a sad note discordant to the tune ,of chastened reverent feeling in the breasts ,of men and women owning debt indeed ,for hospitality sincerely meant ,by ,publius they well knew1 yet paramount ,allegiance owning to a jealous ,god ,who brooked no name divine beside ,his own4 ,all toward ,paul turning waited1 and he spoke3 ,o ,publius1 guests are we and thou art host2 ,most gracious we acknowledge thee to be1 ,as most ungracious were we did we not1 ,or undiscerning4 ,thou hast honored us ,using that frankness to set forth thy ways1 ,thine1 and thy fellow countrymen's2 ways yet ,far alien from the ways endeared to us4 ,these let me1 honoring thee thus with return ,of frankness like thine own1 declare to thee4 ,we count that thy so-named divinities ,are nothing such as thou supposest them4 ,they are not gods1 since ,god is one1 and will ,his incommunicable majesty ,permit none other to partake with ,him4 ,perhaps1 when ye idolaters enshrine ,reputed images of whom ye call ,gods and these worship with your various rites1 ,it is with some endeavor of your thought ,beyond the sign to what is signified4 ,but so even is your worship worse than vain4 ,for there is nothing in the world--the world ,of things existent1 things substantial1 real1 ,spirit or matter--that as counterpart ,answers to these conceived resemblances1 ,these idols framed by your artificers1 ,pretending to be images of gods2 ,nothing1 ,i mean1 that can be called ,divine4 ,behind them there is something real indeed1 ,but evil1 not good2 no such reality ,as that ye dream4 ,demons1 not gods are they1 ,who1 hid behind your idols1 mask and mock4 ,therefore we can but hate idolatry1 ,and flee it as one flees a pestilence4 ,forgive me1 the affront is not to thee1 ,not to thy fellow worshippers misled1 ,but to the kingdom of the ,evil ,one1 ,that emperor of the powers of the air ,who for a season yet has sufferance here ,to practice his impostures on mankind4 ,thou therefore1 ,o lord ,publius1 understand1 ,thou1 and ye others not of ,hebrew race1 ,that we1 full gladly sharing this fair feast1 ,and out of true hearts thanking him our host1 ,know nothing of the dedications made ,of meats or drinks partaken to those gods ,no gods2 but give our worship and our praise ,only to one ,god over all ,most ,high1 ,the ,maker and the ,ruler of all worlds1 ,jehovah named1 blessd forevermore4 ,add to our debt1 ,o ,publius1 also this1 ,that ,i have spoken thus without offence4 ,paul ended with a look toward ,publius1 then ,also toward ,julius present there1 which these ,felt as fixed firmness tempered with appeal4 ,publius took counsel with quick sounding eyes ,on the centurion bent1 and answered thus1 ,his own thought by that other's fortified3 ,o ,paul1 have thou thy will2 no will have ,i ,in this thing2 all is one to me2 our gods ,are our conventions1 and we worship them ,in form1 but not in spirit4 ,strange to us ,it seems1 us more enlightened than the crowd1 ,us who have tasted of philosophy1 ,to see thee thus engaged in earnestness ,on the behalf of things not seen1 not known4 ,paul broke in with a burst of testimony3 ,but ,i have seen1 but ,i have known4 ,the ,lord1 ,the ,lord ,christ1 ,son of ,god declared1 from heaven ,flashed in a sudden vision once on me1 ,sudden and swift1 for both my eyes went blind4 ,it was a stroke of lightning blinded thee1 ,said ,publius4 ,nay1 the sky was cloudless clear1 ,paul answered1 and the hour was high midnoon2 ,the ,syrian sun was shining in his strength4 ,i know whom ,i believe and ,i adore ,and bless ,him1 calling on my soul and all ,that is within me to adore and bless ,his holy name4 ,whether we eat or drink1 ,or whatsoever do1 in word or deed1 ,we ,his redeemed do all in our ,lord's name1 ,to ,god the ,father giving thanks through ,him4 ,is this thy ,lord to whom thou renderest thus ,thy service1 the whole service of a life1 ,so interrupted ,publius1 is this ,lord ,the same as he whom ,mary tells us of8 ,the same1 ,o ,publius1 answered ,paul4 ,but he-- ,i thought that he was put to death1 replied ,publius4 ,yea1 but ,he burst the bands of death1 ,he rose in power and glory from the grave1 ,he thence ascended far above all height ,into the heaven of heavens beyond all thought1 ,where ,he sat down enthroned forevermore ,by the right hand of ,god2 so ,paul1 enrapt ,and with his rapture aweing all who heard4 ,publius then said1 for now with meat and drink ,the appetite to each was satisfied3 ,o ,paul1 what thou thus sayest quickens in me ,desire to hear the rest of ,mary's tale4 ,that death of shame1 however undeserved1 ,yet fallen on him as if inevitable-- ,he surely would have shunned it1 if he could-- ,had1 ,i will own1 induced in me some doubt ,whether the man who suffered it could be ,indeed the worker of such miracles ,as those that ,mary thought she saw from him4 ,but his triumphant rising from the dead1 ,his after showing of himself to thee1 ,that1 this1 if that1 if this1 did happen--why1 ,such conquest over death and ,hades won ,and by such proof assured to us1 were much4 ,but let us listen to what ,mary yet ,will tell us of the last things to that life ,and of the shameful death that ended it4 ,then1 with the genial sun1 somewhat declined ,from his steep noon1 streaming his golden rays ,into the room to qualify the cool2 ,and with1 beside1 two ample braziers brought ,of coals in ruddy glow1 one at each end1 ,to cheer the shadowed spaces of no sun1 ,the company1 in comfortable wise-- ,after the fragments of the feast1 with due ,despatchful ministry of practised hands1 ,had disappeared1 disposed themselves at will ,and sat attentive to hear ,mary's words4 ,but ,mary's words hung and she did not speak2 ,her voice had like a failing fountain failed1 ,and drifts of pallor whitened all her cheek4 ,a doubtful moment1 and she swayed to fall ,in death or death-like swoon upon the floor4 ,but ,ruth who sat next quickly stayed her up2 ,then1 letting her sink softly toward supine ,on her own bosom1 held her resting thus4 ,resourceful ministration soon revived ,her spirits to ,mary1 till she seemed herself ,again1 and thought that they might trust her now ,not to disturb them more with cause for fear4 ,so1 with a certain added gentleness ,in tone and manner marking her1 she spoke ,thus1 while the rest with added reverence heard3 ,that image of my ,lord abides to me2 ,i see ,him as ,i saw ,him when ,i heard ',behold the man6' ,the memory of my eyes ,is vivid and it seems to dazzle dark ,the vision that by faith ,i ought to see4 ,i know and ,i believe that ,jesus now ,is glorious in the heaven beyond all reach ,of anything to flaw ,his perfect fair4 ,but what he then was still will swim between1 ,and ,i perforce see this instead of that4 ,my ears ring with the maddening murderous shout ,of the chief priests and rulers with the mob ,mingling their voices now1 ',crucify ,him6' ',he made himself the ,son of ,god1' they cry4 ,that frightened ,pilate1 and1 ',whence art thou8' he ,asked ,jesus1 in his palace-hall withdrawn2 ,but ,jesus never answered him a word4 ,pilate was vexed1 and tried browbeating ,him4 ',speakest thou not to me8 ,dost thou not know ,i can release thee if ,i will1' he said2 ',or1 if ,i will can send thee to the cross8' ,then ,jesus spoke4 ,he said3 ',no power is thine ,save as bestowed upon thee from above4 ,therefore who gave me up to thee1 he hath ,the greater sin4' ,pilate perhaps was awed1 ,or he perhaps1 albeit a cruel man1 ,was truly for this once compassionate4 ,however it was1 he sought with quickened zeal ,to pacify the ,jews for the release ,of ,jesus2 but they knew that governor1 ,and he knew that they knew him1 and when they ,cried out1 ',thou art not ,csar's friend1 if thou ,release this man2 whoever makes himself ,a king1 speaks against ,csar1' ,pilate then ,trembled within his mind for guilty fear4 ,he covered over his weakness with vain show ,of mock and sarcasm as1 with ,jesus brought ,forth from within before them1 he exclaimed1 ',behold your king6' ,tumultuously all ,hooted1 ',away with him6 ,away with him6 ,crucify him6' ',what6 ,crucify your king8' ,bitterly said ,pilate1 dashing ruth with sneer4 ,those proud chief priests1 eating their pride at once ,and ,god abjuring1 said3 ',we have no king ,but ,csar4' ,then he gave ,him up to them4 ,but ,pilate acted out before them all ,in symbol a purgation of himself4 ,he had a basin of water brought1 and washed ,his hands1 and said3 ',lo1 ,i am innocent ,of this just blood2 see ye yourselves to it4' ,and all my people shouted out a curse ,upon themselves which for their sakes ,i fain ,had stopped my ears against--if not to hear1 ,could have undone that dreadful curse6 ,they cried1 ',on us and on our children be his blood6' ,god waits yet1 but not long1 to wreak that curse4 ,that was the end of all until the cross4 ,a multitude of people followed ,him1 ,as ,he went forth out of the city gate ,bearing ,his cross to ,golgotha1 the place ,where ,he should suffer4 ,thither going1 they ,met ,simon a ,cyrenean coming in1 ,and1 of some wanton humor seized1 they made ,him take the cross and bear it4 ,with the throng ,mingled1 were many women who like me ,wailed and lamented4 ,but the ,lord to us ,turning said3 ',daughters of ,jerusalem1 ,weep not for me2 but for yourselves weep ye1 ,yea1 and your children4 ,for the days will come ,when1 ,blessed are the barren1 ye shall say1 ,and breasts that never nourished children4 ,lo1 ,then to the mountains men shall lift their cry1 ,fall ye upon us2 ,cover us1 to the hills4' ,while they nailed ,jesus to ,his cross1 ,he spake ,words such as never other spake before2 ,upward ,he spake1 praying1 and not to them4 ',father1' ,he prayed1 'forgive them1 for1 behold1 ,they know not what they do4' ,so there ,he hung1 ,the ,savior of the world1 upon ,his cross4 ,i saw the soldiers four whose watch it was ,sit unconcerned--not knowing what they did6-- ,and cast lots for the garments of the ,lord4 ',jesus of ,nazareth1 ,king of the ,jews1' ,pilate had written in three languages1 ,hebrew1 and ,greek1 and ,latin1 on the cross2 ,for so he gave his jeering humor play4 ,the chief priests winced at this1 and begged of him1 ',king of the ,jews1 write not1 but that he said1 ,king of the ,jews am ,i4' ,but ,pilate spoke ,curtly1 ',what ,i have written1 ,i have written4' ,there then the title stood1 a bitterness ,mixed in their cup of triumph to the ,jews1 ,and a truth deeper far than ,pilate guessed4 ,mary1 the mother of the ,lord1 stood by2 ,jesus beheld her1 and1 close at her side1 ,that one of ,his disciples whom ,he loved4 ,a word then from those suffering lips which wrung ,the mother-heart of ,mary with sweet woe ,to hear it spoken at such time as this4 ',woman1' said ,jesus1 to ,his mother speaking1 ',behold1 thy son6' ,he meant ,john1 for to him ,likewise ,he spake1 ',behold1 thy mother6' ,so ,thenceforward ,mary had with ,john her home4 ,there were chance passers-by that railed on ,him1 ,not knowing1 those too1 what they did6 ,they scoffed1 ,wagging their heads3 ',ha6 ,thou that couldst destroy ,the temple and rebuild it in three days1 ,save thyself now1 and from the cross come down4' ,after the same sort the chief priests and scribes1 ,mocking among themselves1 made mirth and said3 ',others he saved1 let him now save himself6 ,the ,christ of ,god1 the ,king of ,israel1 ,let him come down now from the cross1 and we1 ,we1 will believe on him4' ,two robbers even ,crucified with him joined the ribaldry1 ,tauntingly saying1 ',save thyself and us6' ,but one of them relented1 touched with grace4 ,he praying said1 ',jesus1 remember me ,when ,thou art come into ,thy kingdom6' ,faith ,like that1 to see and to believe--despite ,the shame and seeming helplessness--the king ,in ,jesus of a world beyond the world1 ,won on the ,lord2 and ,he--,he too with faith1 ,sheer faith1 faith far more wonderful in ,him-- ,gave answer calmly as became the king1 ',this day shalt thou be with me in ,paradise4' ,it grew now to be near the point of noon1 ,and there fell midnight darkness on the land ,gross for three hours2 it was as if the sun ,in heaven would not behold that wickedness4 ,then the ,lord ,jesus uttered a loud cry1 ,the saddest that on earth was ever heard2 ',eli1 ,eli1 lama sabachthani1' ,he said4 ,those are the first words of a psalm ,prophetic of a suffering ,savior ,christ2 ,they mean1 ',my ,god1 my ,god1 wherefore hast thou ,forsaken me8' ,that was the bitterness1 ,that must1 ,i think1 have been the bitterness1 ,which most ,he dreaded in ,gethsemane4 ,mary looked up toward ,paul with eyes that asked ,whether she well divined that this was so4 ,paul swerved a little from the point1 but said3 ,the mystery of redemption6 ,a great deep ,it is1 to us unfathomable quite-- ,soundless as is the mystery of sin4 ,but alienation and exile from ,god1 ,distance1 and darkness1 and abandonment1 ,this1 sin works of its own necessity2 ,and this helps make the sinner's punishment4 ,therefore to feel a frightful sense of this ,perhaps was needful to atone for sin4 ,paul so far only1 and then ,mary said3 ,the ,savior's sense of that abandonment ,must have been short1 ,i think1 as short as sharp4 ,for following close upon that lonely cry1 ,there came this word1 ',i thirst4' ,it was as though-- ,the imperious overmastering agony ,of spirit past--the flesh1 silenced before1 ,had leave to speak now witnessing its need4 ,anguished the word was1 but it seemed relief ,to hear such sad acknowledgment succeed ,the desolation of that other wail4 ,they brought a hyssop drenched in vinegar1 ,and on a reed lifted it to ,his lips4 ,that moisture loosed his tongue to speak once more1 ,the utter last time that he ever spake-- ,until ,he used ,his resurrection voice4 ,the words were3 ',it is finished6 ,father1 ,i ,into ,thy hands commend my spirit4' ,loud ,he spoke thus1 and therewith ,his head declined1 ,surrendering so ,his spirit up to ,god4 ,it did not seem like dying1 as men die ,of sickness or of violence causing death4 ,i could not but bethink me how ,he said ,once1 ',i lay down my life1 no man from me ,taketh it1 of myself ,i lay it down6 ,so ,mary1 with a cadence in her voice ,that meant an end of speaking for that time4 ,,book ,,xviii4 ,,krishna4 ,the company still together though the hour is late1 ,krishna1 at the request of ,publius1 after a breathing-spell enjoyed by all under the open sky1 tells the story of the death of ,buddha4 ,a warning recited by him as having proceeded from the dying ,buddha's lips against all speech on the part of his disciples with womankind1 prompts ,krishna to turn1 with apology in his manner1 in a kind of appeal to ,paul1 who1 answering1 gives the contrasted teaching of ,christianity on this topic4 ,at the conclusion of ,krishna's recital1 ,publius makes a few characteristic observations suggested by it1 and the company1 having first agreed to assemble on some favorable day at dawn to hear from ,mary the story of the resurrection of ,jesus1 disperse4 ,,krishna4 ,slowly the solemn of late afternoon ,settled into the somber of twilight3 ,it was a pensive company that there ,sat nursing each his thought as if alone4 ,then ,julius1 out of muse and memory1 ,spoke1 without harming the suspense of awe ,that held all as pavilioned round with ,god3 ,yea1 ,i remember to have heard it said1 ,in fact it was a story of the camp ,among us soldiers in ,jerusalem1 ,that the centurion who stood by and watched ,the doings of that day and ,jesus' death1 ,said1 when he saw that having so cried out ,he yielded up the ghost1 ',surely he was ,the ,son of ,god6' ,the death was wonderful1 ,said ,publius1 not like that of any man4 ,he spoke with reverence far from insincere1 ,and yet a note of shallow in his tone ,was dissonant to the feeling of the hour4 ,this1 ,krishna with a fine discernment felt ,when ,publius turned to him1 and made demand3 ,and now1 ,o ,krishna1 tell us thou of him1 ,thy master ,buddha1 how he met his death4 ,but first1 ,o friends my guests1 he added then1 ,with volatile quick turn1 let us all forth ,into the open underneath the sky ,and shake the languor of our sitting off4 ,the night is fine1 no wind1 and weather mild2 ,a half hour's freedom out of doors to breathe ,the fresh air1 and with motion loose our limbs ,and make our blood brisk1 will be nigh as good ,as a night's sleep for health to body and mind4 ,host and symposiarch1 ,publius clapped his hands1 ,and to the servants promptly answering said3 ,lamps1 and more braziers brim with glowing coals2 ,also refection1 cakes and wine1 good store4 ,therewith the company dispersed at will1 ,wandering in groups or singly as each chose4 ,when1 after a brief interval1 they all ,were under roof once more1 refreshed with change1 ,publius said3 ,the evening yet is long1 ,and all the night thereafter is ours for sleep1 ,with an untouched to-morrow if need be ,to borrow from and piece the measure out4 ,eat ye and drink at leisure and at ease2 ,meanwhile1 and not to overtask our friend ,here who likewise shall share his equal chance ,with us of what may stay hunger and thirst1 ,let us content our nobler appetite ,with viand brought us out of utmost ,ind4 ,the ,roman hugged himself with a pleased sense ,that he had turned his genial phrases right4 ,the ,indian for his part1 not voluble ,by nature1 would have wished to hold his peace2 ,for ,mary's tale had wrought upon him so ,that he was lost in thought and absentness4 ,loth rallied out of mute to use of speech1 ,he felt the bonds of courtesy and said3 ,o ,publius1 would thou hadst rather been content ,to leave this ,hebrew story uncompared4 ,i have no means to parallel it so ,as need were ,i should do for right effect2 ,since neither was ,i present to behold1 ,nor lives there record by eyewitness made4 ,as these words wavering from the ,indian fell1 ,the dimness of the lamplight in the room1 ,clouded with fumy issue from the flame1 ,seemed to become a symbol of that dark1 ,that doubtful1 that uncertain1 which he thus ,shadowed his tale withal--strange contrast felt ,to the eyewitness truth and lifelikeness ,of ,mary's story by full daylight told4 ,but ,krishna heartened himself to firmly say3 ,howbeit there is tradition that we trust4 ,this holds the voyage was peaceful toward the end1 ,the voyage of ,buddha through the last of life2 ,not without pain1 but peaceful as was fit ,for voyage slow tending to the port of peace4 ,there was no persecution of the ,buddh2 ,or he had long outlived it ere his death4 ,he died among old friends who loved him well1 ,soothing him toward nirvna with all heed ,of healing words spoken to him or heard ,from him1 and nothing lacked to stay his steps1 ,as he declined gently1 with neither haste ,to go hence nor desire to linger here1 ,down the slow slope that slides into the sea ,of utter1 utter void and nothingness4 ,it was a kindly office rendered him ,by a fast friend1 ,kunda his name1 that brought1 ,he far from meaning it1 the master's end4 ,kunda prepared his master's food1 a dish ,of swine's flesh dried1 with savory messes dressed4 ,our lord waxed weary with walking1 for he was old2 ,full fifty years long since his wasted youth 7,wasted his youth had been on fleshly lusts71 ,he had gone the beggar's ways from door to door ,while he taught men how to escape from life2 ,weary thus1 ,buddha rested in a grove ,of mangoes2 his disciples1 a great band1 ,accompanying4 ,kunda's was the grove1 and he ,sat by the master's side1 and with his ears ,drank in deep draughts of wisdom from those lips4 ,then he besought the master to partake1 ,the master with his disciples to partake1 ,refreshment on the morrow at his house2 ,by silence ,buddha signified assent4 ,so at the hour boar's flesh was offered him2 ,and he did not refuse it for himself1 ,but bade his host give other food to them1 ,his brethren2 sweet rice was their share1 and cakes4 ,some prescience warned him what the end would be2 ',for other none1 save such as ,i myself1' ,the ,blessd ,one to ,kunda listening said1 ',were able to receive this nourishment1 ,the boar's flesh1 and convert it to right use4 ,so what remains thereof when ,i have done1 ,bury it under ground and eat it not4' ,so spoke lord ,buddha and partook the meat4 ,but he was seized straightway with colic pangs ,that griped him sore2 long time be sought in vain ,for ease to his distress2 but he was calm ,and fully self-possessed amid it all1 ,uttering no complaint4 ,relieved at last ,a little1 he to his attendant said-- nanda that one was1 the ,venerable-- ',on now to ,kusinr ,i will go4' ,but going1 he fell weary with the way ,and rested underneath a tree4 ',i thirst1' ,to nanda he said2 'fetch me to drink4' ,but nanda replied3 ',this stream1 behold1 ,is turbid1 roiled with many passing wheels3 ,yon other river is a pleasant stream1 ,with banks that make it easy of access4' ',i thirst1 ,o nanda1' the master said ,a second time1 repeating the same words4 ,and yet a second time too nanda ,repeated that the nearer stream was foul1 ,and the one farther on approachable ,and clear4 ,a third time ,buddha said1 ',i thirst1' ,and a third time repeated those same words4 ,then nanda no longer made demur1 ,but took a bowl and to the streamlet went4 ,the water that had just been roiled with wheels ,was flowing limpid1 bright1 and sweet4 ,he thought1 ',how wonderful1 how marvellous1 the power1 ,the might1 of the ,tathgata6' ,but he1 ,the ,blessd ,one1 received the bowl and drank4 7,tathgata we call our ,buddha1 so ,honoring him as one who holds himself ,filially faithful to ancestral ways47 ,to ,kusinr faring forward still ,the ,buddha sowed instructions all the way4 ,but that which he in his forethoughtful care ,said for the solacing of ,kunda's mind1 ,should ,kunda peradventure afterward ,hear some one say to him1 ',o ,kunda1 that ,was evil to thee and loss1 that ,buddha died ,having partaken his last meal with thee'-- ,what ,buddha said forefending blame like that1 ,was memorable4 ,he nanda thus taught3 ',tell ,kunda3 ,that was good to thee1 and gain1 ,that the ,tathgata then died when he ,had his last meal as guest of thine partaken4 ,there is no offering of alms in food ,of greater profit unto him who gives ,than when one offers a ,tathgata ,food that once eaten by him he departs ,with that complete departure wherein naught ,of all that late he was is left to be4 ,one admonition our lord ,buddha gave ,in those last times with him1 which let me pray ,from some of you pardon that ,i report2 ,new lessons ,i have learned of womanhood1 ,sharing these feasts of converse with you all4 ,now nanda inquired of ,buddha this3 ',how1 master1 shall we deal with womankind8' ',o nanda1' the master made reply1 ',refrain from seeing them4' ,but nanda ,said3 ',if by chance we see them at some time8' ',abstain1 ,o nanda1 from speech with them1' ,the ,blessd ,one made answer4 nanda ,once more3 ',o master1 if they speak to us8' ',bestir your senses to keep well awake1' ,the ,buddha said in final warning word4 ,the ,indian paused hereon1 his eyes down dropt1 ,a noble gentle shame confusing him4 ,he would have added 7what1 not added1 ,paul ,felt in his manner of reticence implied7 ,tardy acknowledgment of fault his own ,that he at first had spurned the thought proposed ,to him of learning aught from ,mary's lips2 ,acknowledgment condign1 with suit to be ,judged gently since his master so had taught-- ,all this he would have said in words outright1 ,but sense of other duty kept him dumb2 ,besides that he was conscious in his mind ,of being by ,paul already understood4 ,publius as master of the feast perceived ,blindly that here a rally of some sort ,was needed for the rescue of the cheer ,just trembling on the balance to be lost4 ,he was perplexed1 but his perplexity ,was his resource better than ready wit4 ,for1 with a quick dependent instinct1 he ,turned him to ,paul unconsciously confessed ,ascendent wheresoever he might be1 ,and ,paul1 thus silently appealed to1 spoke3 ,such thought of woman is not from the ,lord2 ,the ,lord our ,god made woman one with man4 ,equal8 ,nay1 equal not4 ,inferior8 ,nay1 ,nor equal nor inferior2 as too not ,superior2 rather1 part of him1 as he ,of her1 they twain together one1 and whole ,neither without the other4 ,he is head1 ,not lord and master to rule over her1 ,as she not slave1 not servant1 to be ruled2 ,she1 of her will unforced1 subject to him ,through joyful choice of reverence and of love1 ,and he1 with equal mutual reverent love1 ,honoring her and cherishing as himself4 ,so is it with you1 said ,krishna1 as ,i have seen ,with wonder1 and admired2 almost convinced ,that ye herein are better taught than ,i4 ,if ,i perchance in anything have failed ,of reverence meet toward womankind1 ,i pray ,pardon ye it to me2 and hold besides ,that haply my lord ,buddha had himself ,judged otherwise herein1 with other types ,to judge from of what womankind may be4 ,yea1 ,paul said1 he but judged from what he saw2 ,not knowing he1 as our ,lord ,jesus knew1 ,what ,god from the beginning and before ,established as the order of ,his world1 ,and looked upon it and pronounced it good4 ,but also what your ,buddha judged amiss ,became a force creating what he saw2 ,for teaching and believing1 subtle powers1 ,are plastic to conform us to themselves4 ,what ye believe of woman1 teaching her ,to know that ye believe it of her1 yea1 ,making her half believe it of herself1 ,this she hereby1 even in her own despite1 ,tends to become2 if it unworthy be1 ,then all the issuing stream of humankind1 ,fouled at the fountain thus1 flows forth corrupt ,and ever more corrupt--the stream turned back ,with every generation to its source1 ,and adding to the feculence of that4 ,the ruin has no remedy but one4 ,the ,lord ,christ by a woman came to us1 ,and opened a new fountain for our race1 ,pure1 more than pure1 for purifying too4 ,life drawn from ,him1 life fed from ,him1 life lived ,in ,him and for ,him1 that alone is pure1 ,and endless because boundless2 blessd2 joy1 ,and peace1 and power1 and triumph evermore4 ,his life may all through faith in ,him partake1 ,faith which unites us vitally to ,him4 ,christ is the founder of a race redeemed1 ,redeemed from sin1 and death1 and every ill4 ,in ,him believing1 we rejoice with joy ,unspeakable and full of glory1 now ,already though before the time in hope4 ,belief in misery makes miserable4 ,we do not need to be defeated so2 ,thanks be to ,god ,most ,high who giveth us ,the victory through ,jesus ,christ our ,lord6 ,would that thy ,buddha groping in his dark1 ,nobly as seems1 with that maimed nobleness ,which only is left possible by sin ,without a ,savior known1 ah1 would that he ,had known a ,savior such as ,christ the ,lord6 ,yet let us hear1 ,o ,publius1 if so please ,thee and so please ,krishna likewise1 the rest ,concerning ,buddha's death4 ,we shall at least1 ,sorrowing with wholesome sorrow for his case1 ,learn from such high example how far short ,the highest human and the best1 unhelped1 ,must fall of helping helpless humankind4 ,the tone of just authority in ,paul1 ,felt to be not assertion of himself ,but fealty to his ,lord effacing self1 ,was mixed so with a suasive gentleness ,in manner and even a certain deference ,to other as that other's right from him1 ,all without harm or loss allowed to truth1 ,that ,krishna was both charmed and overawed ,while discomposed not1 and he thus went on3 nanda was concerned to know what dues ,of honor should be paid to the remains ,of the ,tathgata when he was gone4 ,but ,buddha said3 ',ye must not wrong yourselves ,to honor the ,tathgata's remains2 ,others will honor these4 ,be zealous ye1 ,i pray you1 on your own behalf4 ,devote ,yourselves to your own profit4 ,earnest be ,and eager and intent for your own good4' ,yet ,buddha taught that the ,tathgata ,was to be honored after his decease ,by rites of reverence to his remains ,like those accorded to a king of kings1 ,now nanda the ,venerable was weighed ,to heaviness with sorrow at the thought3 ',alas1 ,i still am but a learner1 much ,to me remains of labor1 ere ,i reach ,nirvna2 and my master1 he so kind1 ,is on the point to pass away from me4' ,so1 leaned against the lintel of the door1 nanda stood and thought and thinking wept4 ,but ,buddha sending called him to himself1 ,and said3 ',enough1 ,o nanda1 weep not1 ,nor let thyself be troubled4 ,have ,i not ,oft told thee that it deep inheres in things ,the nearest and the dearest unto us1 ,that we must leave them1 rend ourselves away1 ,sever ourselves from them8 ,how could it be1 nanda1 otherwise than thus8 ,for know1 ,whatever thing is born1 whatever comes ,into existence1 holds within itself ,the seed of dissolution and decay2 ,such being therefore needs must cease to be4 ,long time thou1 nanda1 to me hast been1 ,by many offices of love1 most near1 ,unchanging love and without measure large4 ,thrice say ,i this that thou mayst know it well3 ,long time thou1 nanda1 to me hast been1 ,by many offices of love1 most near1 ,unchanging love and without measure large4 ,long time thou1 nanda1 to me hast been ,by many offices of love1 most near1 ,unchanging love and without measure large4 ,thou hast well done1 ,o nanda4 ,faint not1 ,thou too shalt soon ,ansava become'-- ,whereby our lord meant his disciple soon ,should touch the wished-for goal himself was now ,nigh touching1 blest nirvna1 last surcease ,of all the ills that sum up human life4 ,at length lord ,buddha said to nanda3 ',go now for me into ,kusinr ,and tell them the ,tathgata is here1 ,close on the point to pass forever away4 ,say3 ,leave no room to chide yourselves too late3 ,alas1 and he in our own village died1 ,he1 the ,tathgata1 and we then failed ,to come and visit him in his last hours4' ,so all the dwellers in ,kusinr ,came and did honor to the ,blessd ,one4 ,then to the brethren of the order he ,said3 ',if in mind perchance to any of you ,doubt or misgiving lurk concerning aught1 ,the ,buddh1 the truth1 the path1 the way1 inquire ,freely before ,i pass1 that afterward ,ye have not to reproach yourselves that ye ,being face to face with him failed to inquire4' ,with one accord1 the brethren held their peace4 ,the second and the third time those same words ,did the ,tathgata to them address2 ,but even the third time they were silent all4 ,then with much pitiful concern for them ,the ,buddha said3 ',it may be out of awe ,of me1 your master1 ye keep silence thus4 ,speak therefore ye1 ,i pray1 among yourselves4' ,but all the brotherhood were silent still4 ,then nanda the ,venerable spoke up ,and said3 ',a wonder and a marvel1 lord1 ,i truly think there has not one of us ,a doubt or a misgiving in his mind ,as to the ,buddh1 the truth1 the path1 the way4 ,the ,blessd ,one made answer3 'nanda1 ,thou from the fulness of thy faith hast spoken2 ,but the ,tathgata for certain knows ,not one of these five hundred brethren all ,doubt or misgiving has concerning aught1 ,the ,buddh1 the truth1 the path1 the way4 ,no one ,of all but guarded is from future birth ,to suffering2 your salvation is secure4' ,he added3 ',brethren1 ,i exhort you1 know1 ,decay inheres in whatsoever is1 ,of parts composed1 since these may be dissolved4 ,inflame your zeal1 make your salvation sure4' ,the last word that of the ,tathgata4 ,yet did he not with that last word expire1 ,but enter into a state ineffable4 ,from stage to stage1 four stages1 he advanced1 ,of meditation more and more withdrawn4 ,a fifth stage followed1 one of vacancy ,compact3 all seeming substance1 seeming form1 ,abolished to the mind1 and naught but space1 ,pure space1 empty and formless1 colorless1 ,spun out to infinite on every side4 ,the next degree abolished also space1 ,replacing that with reason infinite4 ,but reason infinite then passed away1 ,dispersed into a sense of nothingness4 ,then sense of nothingness1 that yielded too1 ,and neither anything nor nothing was ,a presence in sensation to the soul4 ,but beyond that he passed into a state ,between unconsciousness and consciousness2 ,whence next he issued in a farther stage ,wherein no trace of consciousness remained4 ,then of two venerables there watching1 one ,said to the other1 ',the ,blessd ,one is dead2' ,but1 ',nay1' that other made reply1 'not dead1 ,only beyond where thought or feeling is4' ,then by regress the ,blessd ,one returned ,the way that he had traversed1 stage by stage1 ,till1 having reached the first stage1 now the last1 ,that of deep meditation1 he expired4 ,so our lord ,buddha having all the depths ,sounded unto their nethermost1 and scaled ,unto their topmost all the soaring heights1 ,of thought and being1 like a weaver's shuttle ,to and fro passing1 and found naught at all ,the substance and the basis of the world1 ,himself at last absorbed in the abyss ,escaped existence and sank into peace4 ,the lamps had burned to low1 and some of them ,had flickered to a fall1 while ,krishna spoke-- ,their fumy flames meanwhile blurring the air ,to dimness deepened with the deepening night4 ,the stillness of the room was audible1 ,accented by the murmurous monotone ,of ,krishna's muffled1 bland1 and inward voice4 ,the strange1 far-off1 unreal1 unthinkable ,last things he told involved the laboring mind ,too1 in a sense confused of cloud and dark4 ,when he ceased speaking1 with that word pronounced1 ,peace1 like a hollow sphere of sound1 no core1 ,it was as if1 with that for spell outbreathed1 ,nirvna softly would engulf them all4 ,but one was there to whom such spell was naught4 ',peace1' ,publius said1 reechoing the word1 ,as pondering what the purport of it was1 ',peace1' ,i should think must be a euphemism1 ,as the ,greeks say when they avoid a name1 ,the right name1 for a thing to be avoided4 ,there is no peace1 unless there be some one ,to have the peace2 but ,buddha then was not1 ,had vanished like a breath breathed on the air1 ,if of his end ,i have understood thee right4 ,thou hast not misunderstood1 said ,krishna2 yet ,we shrink from saying of ,buddha1 ',he is not4' ,we sheathe the sense1 and softly say instead1 ',he has ceased to suffer1' ',he has touched the goal4' ,himself he would not say1 ',i shall not be2' ,but if he taught us true that life is woe1 ,then not to suffer1 needs is not to live3 ,save not to live1 salvation there is none4 ,aye1 ,publius said1 ,i see1 a euphemism2 ,a needed euphemism1 and well devised4 ,for who1 not weary of life through long defeat1 ,or through disease1 old age1 or loss of good1 ,or else exhausted in the springs of joy ,within himself through waste of youth and health ,in those excesses which bring on decay ,before its season--who not broken so1 ,here and there one1 not many in any time1 ,would to that bait proffered without disguise1 ,mere blank non-being1 spring with appetite8 ,and those1 the few who did1 would they await ,nirvna as the goal of long pursuit1 ,not snatch it instant with rash suicide8 ,we ,romans have a growing fashion of so ,precipitately rushing on our end4 ,i trow thou wouldst in vain strive to persuade ,us ,romans to spend tedious years and years ,in seeking not to live so as not to suffer2 ,we should be too impatient far for that4 ,o ,publius1 ,krishna said1 rash suicide ,is no escape from life4 ,life has its snare ,safe round thee still1 and thou art born again ,into another form1 another state1 ,worse1 and not better1 than before4 ,the ,path1 ,that only1 leads thee to the utter end3 ,so ,buddha taught and so ,i have believed4 ,the ,indian ceased thus with the air of one ,wavering where he had certain been before2 ,and ,publius felt that he for ,krishna spoke1 ,scarce less than for himself1 when he inquired3 ,aye1 aye1 how know we that the ',path1' to name ,thus by thy word a thing to me unknown1 ,how know we that the ,path1 even that1 indeed ,will lead one out of life to nothingness8 ,if so be ,buddha's doctrine holds1 and life ,slides on from form to form1 from state to state1 ,unhindered by the fact of suicide1 ,how know we that there ever comes an end8 ,consider1 he himself1 the teacher1 may1 ,who knows8--this moment while we talk of him ,be fleeting forward on the endless flight ,fatal of that metempsychosis preached4 ,what surety have we that it is not so8 ,and since so much we ask1 let us ask more1 ,o ,krishna4 ,how know we the master died ,after the manner that thou toldst us of8 ,that ,kunda's kindly hospitable meal ,was followed by that sickness to his guest2 ,that his guest bore it with sweet fortitude1 ,not intermitting his serene discourse ,the while1 yet weakening slowly till he died-- ,thus much1 ,i say1 might be observed by those ,who stood about the master so bestead2 ,but who could tell that in his secret mind ,the dying ,buddha accomplished all that strange ,vicissitude and movement to and fro1 ,which thou in honey-flowing speech describedst1 ,but which1 pardon1 ,i could not understand4 ,himself1 the ,buddha1 uttered not one word ,through all1 made not a motion nor a sign4 ,how1 pray1 did those disciples round him pierce ,the dark and silence of their master's mind1 ,to know what passed therein8 ,ah1 ,krishna said1 ,the master had foretold those things would be ,to him1 and they believed1 and therefore knew4 ,aye1 ,publius said1 they knew by faith1 not proof2 ,but we1 we of the ,west1 are fond of proof4 ,yet proof of ,buddha's dying so as thou ,describedst1 proof likewise that he1 so dying1 ,was cancelled quite from out the universe-- ,proof of these things1 conceded these things were1 ,would1 ,i can see1 be no wise possible2 ,we may believe them1 but we cannot prove4 ,now if thy master had taught otherwise1 ,contrariwise indeed1 that life1 not death-- ,not death1 but life victorious over death-- ,was the chief good1 and that this good the chief ,might be attained by us1 and how attained1 ,that were a doctrine would have cheered one more1 ,and been besides more capable of proof4 ,at least good proof of it might be conceived4 ,buddha1 supposed extinguished utterly ,out of the world1 he being nowhere at all1 ,could not come hither back and testify1 ',behold me1 ,i am non-existent now4' ,but one who taught the opposite1 who taught ,that death was not the end of life1 if he ,himself1 having died1 could conquer death and live1 ,could living hither come and speak to us1 ,and say1 ',i told you ,i would rise again6' ,why1 ,krishna1 that were proof and ',path' indeed1 ,aye1 path as solid as a ,roman road4 ,it seems from this our ,hebrew lady's tale1 ,that ,jesus1 ere he suffered on the cross1 ,promised again and yet again that he ,would rise the third day from the dead and live4 ,i doubt not thou thyself1 with all of us1 ,wouldst gladly farther hear from her at full ,whether and how this promise was fulfilled4 ,that is a tale for a new day and dawn1 ,paul said2 the resurrection of the ,lord ,was morning before morning when it came4 ,mary1 not waiting for daybreak1 repaired ,by twilight to ,his tomb and found it void4 ,a great while before day the ,lord sometimes ,would rouse him and go forth apart to pray2 ,perhaps a great while before day ,he now ,woke from the sleep of death1 and left his tomb4 ,what morning then it was dawned on the world6 ,well thought1 said ,publius2 let us at daybreak1 ,some day not long hence when the weather smiles1 ,meet out of doors and see sunrise1 while we ,hear also of that sunrise on the world ,paul in his master's resurrection finds2 ,whereof to hear at least1 surely were sweet4 ,spring hastens hither1 with the punctual sun ,returning from his winter in the south4 ,there will not fail a weather warm enough1 ,some select balmier morning by and by1 ,to make it pleasant for us1 in a place ,i know of on the sheltered ocean shore ,fronting full east1 to meet and hear a tale ,so well befitting spring and morning both ,as a tale told of victory over death4 ,i will1 if so it please all1 undertake ,to rally you in season when signs say1 ,now6 ,thereon the company broke up1 with thanks ,from each guest to the host for heartsome cheer ,provided2 and with silent prayer from each ,that ,god would bless him through their guestship there ,more than he dreamed of needing to be blessed6 ,,book ,,xix4 ,,baptism ,,of ,,krishna4 ,krishna1 much wrought upon in his secret mind1 seeks a private interview with ,paul4 ,the two converse at large1 ,paul expounding his doctrine of sin and of salvation through faith in ,christ4 ,krishna resists1 feeling nevertheless an impulse in himself responsive to ,paul's words4 ,they part with nothing concluded between them1 but ,krishna meditating alone is finally brought to obedience of faith4 ,he seeks the company of the ,christian disciples and declares himself a believer4 ,he expressing eager desire to testify as soon as possible in some outward act commanded by ,jesus his readiness to obey ,him1 ,paul tells him of the command ,be baptized1 and ,krishna accordingly is baptized by ,aristarchus1 ,paul giving the new disciple appropriate counsel and exhortation4 ,,baptism ,,of ,,krishna4 ,as the days passed1 the prisoner ,paul1 allowed ,the freedom of his ways about the isle1 ,would often1 musing by himself alone-- ,or haply his shadow ,stephen following so ,as never to be seen yet ever see ,in jealous loving watch and ward of him-- ,walk in seclusions well to ,julius known ,where1 held by all the islanders in awe ,and sentried as if sentried not the while1 ,he could be safe in sense of solitude ,and easement from the fret of custody4 ,he walking thus one sunny afternoon1 ,the ,indian met him at the hither goal ,and entrance to his wonted rounding ways1 ,and with such salutation greeted him ,as seemed to seek access for mutual speech4 ,paul1 out of insulation and himself ,emerging wholly at his fellow's call1 ,rallied at once to be a social man2 ,he welcomed ,krishna frankly to his side1 ,and they twain walked and talked together there4 ,o ,paul1 said ,krishna1 ,i am not at rest2 ,thou1 and that ,mary's story of her ,lord1 ,have deeply shaken my repose in me4 ,there must have been1 lodged in me from the first1 ,a witness ready to speak up and say1 ',hearken1 ,o ,krishna6' when the name of ',god' ,fell on my ear4 ,for since that word from thee1 ,i have not ceased to hear within me cry ,reverberant through the chambers of my soul-- ,like a voluminous echo shouting round ,reduplicated images of voice-- ,clamor and attestation vehement ,confirming what thou saidst that day of ,god1 ,and of our orphanhood without ,him4 ,oh1 ,my friend1 that ,i might find ,him1 ,i1 even ,i6 ,such passion in passivity moved ,paul ,to pity1 which he hid1 while thus he spoke3 ,it is the answer of the infinite ,within thee to the infinite above ,thee and beneath thee and about thee round4 ,god made thee for ,himself1 and ,himself is ,the only good that can content thy mind4 ,feel after ,him and find ,him1 ,he is nigh1 ,drawn nigh and drawing nigh1 in ,jesus ,christ4 ,not to believe in ,him1 ,god's ,son made flesh-- ,he once revealed to thee--this1 this1 is sin2 ,and sin is death2 but to believe is life4 ,believe and live1 ,o ,krishna4 ,thy word 'sin1' ,o ,paul1 said ,krishna1 it perplexes me4 ,what is sin8 ,evil1 ,i guess4 ,now evil ,i know ,in many forms--forms many1 essence one-- ,misery all4 ,but sin to thee1 ,i trow1 ,is something else than simple misery4 ,o1 yea1 said ,paul1 and measurelessly more4 ,no misery is like sin1 but sin is evil ,not to be told in terms of misery4 ,the sinner is an enemy of ,god2 ,god is against him1 and the wrath of ,god ,abides upon him2 such is the evil of sin4 ,for sin is the transgression of the law1 ,that law which is the will of ,god express ,in precept1 or that law more broad1 more deep1 ,higher1 which is the will of ,god inwrought ,into the substance of the human heart4 ,thou canst not live transgressor of this law ,and be at peace2 ,god is too merciful ,to suffer it4 ,for mercy it is in ,god ,which wrath we call2 against the sinner1 wrath2 ,but toward the man1 mercy eager to save3 ,the wrath of ,god is as the shepherd's crook ,which with threat drives the foolish flock to fold4 ,hasten1 obey1 be folded1 thou1 by ,him1 ,the shepherd and the bishop of thy soul4 ,within is safety1 life1 and peace1 and joy2 ,ruin1 without1 and wretchedness1 and death4 ,a living ,will1 said ,krishna1 in the waste1 ,the wild waste1 of a world of chance and fate-- ,a ,will amid it1 nay1 much more1 a ,mind1 ,a ,heart1 present1 presiding over all ,the blind whirl of the things we see1 whereof ,we seem ourselves a petty part1 impelled ,helpless--whither1 who knows8--this is to me ,a thought greater than the great universe2 ,yet does it less than that oppress1 appal2 ,i feel my spirit in me quickened too ,while overwhelmed4 ,o were it true indeed6 ,and were this ,being whom thou namest ,god ,willing to condescend and think on me6 ,i feel that ,i could love ,him if ,i could ,believe ,him--in the teeth of all that seems ,to swear against ,him in this dreadful world6 ,the whole creation groaneth1 yea1 said ,paul1 ,and travaileth under the curse of sin4 ,but the blind-bondman universe awaits ,with earnest expectation a new day ,when he shall be delivered from his thrall1 ,to share1 we know not how1 that liberty ,which is the birthright of the sons of ,god4 ,meantime the discord and the perjury ,thou seest of a distracted universe ,forsworn against its ,maker6 ,yet even so ,enough abides unshaken from the firm ,fair order of the first all-wise design1 ,to testify ,his everlasting power ,who framed it4 ,but1 beyond that perjury ,thou findest in the janglings of the world ,browbeating faith herself to disbelieve1 ,is the blaspheming atheous spirit in man ,which will not ,god4 ,o strife and warfare strange ,within us6 ,godward-springing instinct fain ,to answer ',abba1 ,father6' to ,his call1 ,and all the while rebellion muttering1 ',nay6' ,o wretched1 wretched creatures that we are6 ,who1 who is able to deliver us ,out of the clinging body of this death8 ,i thank my ,god1 through ,jesus ,christ our ,lord6 ,christ's voice against the clamor of the world1 ,his still small voice1 heard by the inner ear ,of whosoever will heed and obey1 ,makes music of this roaring dissonance ,which dins and deafens every one besides4 ,hush the gainsaying of the heart within1 ,o ,krishna1 the dull heart of unbelief1 ,and hearken if thou shalt not presently ,hear ,him say1 ,come4 ,it is a heavenly sound1 ,heard never save by the anointed ear ,of true obedience2 but once heard thereby ,it ever after lingers in the sense ,a haunting invitation still obeyed4 ,and still as we obey it1 drawing near ,and nearer to that ,voice forevermore1 ,forevermore we hear the harmony ,evolved from the confusions of the world ,grow perfect and the discord die away4 ,like as a human father pitieth ,his children1 so ,jehovah ,god ,most ,high ,pitieth them that fear ,him4 ,this long since ,we heard through one inspired from ,god to sing ,it cadenced in our sweet and solemn psalms4 ,krishna could not but speak his froward thought3 ,it looks such contradiction to the fact ,staring us in the face from round about ,us wheresoever in the world we turn ,our eyes and see the seeming pitiless ,ongoing of the blind necessity ,that1 deaf and blind and irresistible1 ,rides like a ,juggernaut upon his car ,crushing beneath the wheels the hearts of men ,and spirting up their blood to splash his feet6 ,unwonted passion heaved the ,indian's breast1 ,and shook the tones in which he said these things4 ,paul gently made reply as one that knew3 ,yea1 such the spectacle that sight beholds2 ,nor ever other had the mind of man ,guessed1 had the voice of ,god not spoken clear ,to ,faith1 revealing ,his veiled fatherhood3 ,the blatant falsehood of the seeming fact ,failed in the ear of ,faith hearing that word4 ,she said3 ',it must be true2 how otherwise ,than because ,god ,himself who cannot lie ,declared it could such gospel come to men8 ,not from the world of sense2 that world instead ,gainsays it with all clamor of perjury2 ,not from the heart of man averse from ,god ,and full of alien fear through hate of ,him3 ,for filial fear it is1 begot of love1 ,not alien fear1 of conscious hate begot1 ,that ,god desires from men and will reward ,with pity like a father's for their state4 ,yea1 such a gospel must from ,god have come2 ,let ,god be true and the whole world a liar4' ,so ,faith cried out in passionate protest ,against appearance1 and clasped fast her creed4 ,but when the fulness of the time was come1 ,god sent a mighty succor down to ,faith ,faint with her fasting in the wilderness4 ,from ,his own bosom ,he ,his only ,son1 ,only and well-belovd1 the express ,image of ,his own person and the bright ,effulgence of the ,father's glory1 tore ,and bade ,him1 joyful at the mission ,he3 ',empty ,thyself of thine equality ,with ,me in ,godhead2 take the lowly form ,of a bondservant2 fashioned like a man ,humble ,thyself to be obedient ,through all degrees of all obedience ,unfaltering down to that extreme degree ,of death1 yea even of death upon the cross6' ,for ,god so loved the world1 with pity loved1 ,that ,he ,his own ,son and ,his only gave ,that whosoever should on ,him believe ,might perish not1 but have eternal life4 ,a paradox divine of love and pity-- ,god sparing not ,his own coequal ,son1 ,but1 last impossible proof of love to men1 ,giving ,him freely up to suffer so1 ,the just for the unjust1 if haply ,he ,might bring us unto ,god6 ,his father's heart ,of tenderness toward ,his obedient ,son ,breaking1 while ,he that ,son delivered up-- ,father and ,son together overcome ,with love and pity toward a wretched race ,apostate1 disobedient1 rebel1 lost6 ,well spake that ,savior ,son while yet ,he lived ,a heavenly exile here on earth--,he now ,about to suffer at the hands of whom ,he came to save--making the sum of sin ,consist in not believing upon ,him4 ,not to believe on such as ,jesus ,christ ,seen living1 the exemplar of all good1 ,that1 that1 was sin indeed4 ,yet greater sin1 ,yea1 sin inclusive and conclusive1 this-- ,not to believe on ,christ raised from the dead6 ,paul interrupted his discourse with pause4 ,he eased the pressure on his heart with prayer1 ,while ,krishna slowly1 softly1 sadly said3 ',sin as transgression of a law supreme2 ,law as expression of a living ,will2 ,nay1 the existence of a living ,will ,sovereign over an ordered universe2 ,much more1 a ,heart behind the ,will to feel ,pity and love1 such pity and such love1 ,not idle passion but at work to save1 ,save at vicarious cost so great--these thoughts1 ,ill canst thou know how new they are to me1 ,how strange6 ,sin1 sin--and sinner ,i1 for this1 ,that ,i do not believe on him6 ,but thou1 ,tell me1 ,what is it to believe on him8 ,i willingly believe that he was good1 ,was wise1 was gentle1 gracious1 merciful4 ,believe that he was what he claimed to be1 ,said ,paul1 absolute lord of life and thought ,to all men1 and to thee4 ,acknowledge ,him ,thy ,lord2 believing is obeying here4 ,to whom ,he ,master is1 to them is ,he ,also a ,savior2 trust thyself to ,him4 ,a fearful act of self-surrender thou1 ,o ,paul1 said ,krishna1 thus proposest to me4 ,take ,jesus for my lord in life and thought1 ,absolute lord as thou hast strongly said it1 ,that might be1 for what were it but exchange ,of masters1 ,buddha left for ,jesus2 true1 ,never such claim of mastership made he1 ,our ,buddha1 as thou sayest thy ,jesus makes-- ,but to commit myself into the hands ,of any1 whosoever he may be1 ,to be saved--saved from what1 to what1 how saved8-- ,with sudden turn on ,paul1 ,krishna thus spoke1 ,the gentleness which was his manner1 now ,to almost fierceness changed1 so vehement ,was the revulsion and revolt expressed4 ,am ,i so lost ,i cannot save myself8 ,he added1 when he could command his tones ,to speak with full becoming courtesy-- ,an inexpugnable repulsion yet ,shown of the answer that he thus invoked4 ,calmly1 but without effort to be calm1 ,o1 yea1 said ,paul1 so lost1 and worse than so2 ,so lost thou dost not wish to save thyself2 ,nay1 dost not know thou needest to be saved4 ,it is the sad besotment deep of sin1 ,wherein not thou alone but all of us ,since ,adam1 the first man1 are sunk and lost4 ,we are dead in sin1 this even from our first breath1 ,and1 like the dead1 know not that we are dead1 ,and1 like the dead1 care not to live again1 ,nor1 more than they1 could1 if we would1 revive4 ,a dreadful doom of helpless living death6 ,helpless1 yet hopeless not1 blessd be ,god6 ,yea1 there is hope1 albeit not in ourselves2 ,christ is a power of life that overflows ,to all that will make ready a way for ,him ,to enter by the gladsome gates of will4 ,he quickens whom ,he will1 but will not quicken ,save who will say to ,him1 ',lord1 quicken me6' ,a paradox1 sayest thou1 hard to be solved8 ,yea1 more1 outright impossibility-- ,with man impossibility1 but not ,with ,god2 with ,god1 all things are possible4 ,thou makest this thing 'sin1' the ,indian said1 ,such evil as is more miserable far ,than misery's self4 ,who taught thee this8 ',sin1''sin'-- ,is it not perhaps some specter of the mind ,only1 unreal as horrible1 which thou ,hast conjured up from nothing to thyself ,in thy lone brooding on the riddle of things8 ,paul hearing this thought backward of the time ,when ,porcius ,festus brusquely said to him ,in public presence3 ',paul1 thou art mad2 thy long ,deep pouring over books turns wild thy wits4' ,with himself musing3 ',one in his right mind ,thus to be judged distraught by those distraught6' ,he answered3 ,yea1 that is a wile ,i know ,of ,satan's playing on this human heart ,of ours1 deceitful as it is above ,all things and desperately wicked1 yet ,insanely cunning in complicity ,against itself--a wile ,i know too well ,to cheat us into thinking naught of sin4 ,a bugbear of the morbid conscience1 sin6 ,i might myself have been1 ,i cannot know1 ,lulled by this lie into false fatal peace2 ,but the ,lord ,christ ,himself appeared to me ,in light like lightning though a hundred fold ,keener1 shot suddenly from out a clear ,sky at midnoon1 and called me by my name1 ,the name that then ,i bore2 ',saul1 ,saul1' ,he said1 ',why dost thou persecute ,me8' ',thee1' said ,i1 ',who art thou1 ,lord8' ,and ,he1 ',jesus ,i am ,whom thou dost persecute4' ,that moment first1 ,in its true hideous native aspect shown1 ,sin was revealed to me4 ,i saw it wear ,a face of horrible malignity ,gnashing its teeth on ,jesus1 the ,one ,man ,who sinned not ever and yet died for sin1 ,died for the sin that slew ,him1 for my sin ,that slew ,him on the bitter cross1 that still ,was slaying ,him afresh--who died for me4 ,i found the truth and meaning of those words ,by ,jesus from the imminent verge of death ,spoken1 that not believing upon ,him ,was the one sin4 ,when the ideal man ,is shown us1 then to know ,him not for such ,betokens us how besotted6--beyond hope2 ,but if the ideal man be ,son of ,god ,and bring us out of heaven a word from ,him1 ,not to receive the message1 nay1 to flout ,the messenger himself as ,i had done1 ,yea1 was that moment doing when the light ,i spoke of fell on me--what height1 what depth ,of sin6 ,o1 sin's exceeding sinfulness6 ,and yet1 not so even is the measure full4 ,for ,god in testimony of ,his ,son ,put forth the working of ,his mighty power ,and raised ,him from the dead1 exalting ,him ,to the right hand of glory with ,himself4 ,christ then1 there sitting by ,his ,father's side ,and with ,him reigning1 victor over death ,and over him that had the power of death1 ,the devil1 sent thence the ,holy ,spirit down ,hither to us to lead us into truth4 ,the ,holy ,spirit in thy heart1 ,o ,krishna1 ,grieve ,him not1 send ,him not away from thee6 ,it was ,his secret prompting made thee take ,that spring toward ,god at mention of ,his name4 ,yield to ,him1 ,he desires thy good1 consent ,to be convinced of sin--sin still committed ,till thou believe on ,jesus ,christ as ,lord2 ,and now a sin against the ,holy ,ghost6 ,solemn the words1 spoken solemnly by ,paul2 ,they wrought an awe in ,krishna hearing them4 ,the sense indeed was half not understood2 ,yet not the less1 almost it seemed the more1 ,they touched him to the quickest in his soul4 ,paul too was awed and did not further speak1 ,thinking1 ',let me beware not to obtrude ,myself untimely between ,god and man6' ,nay1 even he would that ,krishna were alone1 ,to wrestle in that solemn solitude ,wherein needs must at last the human spirit ,ever transact the awful mystery ,of its own reconcilement with its ,god4 ,yet ,paul so wishing still would not withdraw1 ,he might inhospitable seem or seem ,too conscious of his fellow's inward strife2 ,he prayed in silence with unutterable ,strong yearning of desire quickened with hope3 ',let ,krishna win the victory of defeat6' ,the ,indian soon with gesture of farewell ,unspoken1 which meant thanks and courtesy ,habitual1 but meant also not habitual ,appeal for sympathy in felt helplessness1 ,as who should say1 ',pray1 pray for me1' retired4 ',impossible6' so he murmured to himself2 ',i would have paid a hundred million years ,of pain and patience and unceasing toil ,to buy escape from being and misery4 ,now to accept deliverance as a gift1 ,acknowledging that ,i cannot purchase it-- ,i sicken within me at the very thought6 ,deliverance not from being but misery-- ,if that could be6 ,fulness of life1 not death6 ,aye1 that were better--were it possible6 ,i do not wish to cease from consciousness ,if consciousness can be1 apart from woe4 ,o ,thou who must be1 ,thou whom since ,i heard ,thy name ,i cannot doubt more than ,i doubt ,myself1 ,thou1 ,god1 is this thy word indeed1 ,that ,i am lost in sin as not believing ,on that man ,jesus for mine only ,lord8 ,is he thy ,son8 ,shall ,i trust all to him8 ,all1 all1 as if ,i were a little child8 ',what is it in my heart that answers1 ,yea8 ,is it ,thou1 ,o ,holy ,spirit8 ,if it be ,thou1 and none other and naught else than ,thou ,then certify ,thyself1 give me a sign6 ,ah1 but ,i know1 ,i know4 ,o heart within1 ,thou wilt not cheat thyself thus6 ,thou and ,i1 ,we know full well when ,god speaks it is ,he1 ,he and none other4 ,other none than ,thou1 ,paul's ,god1 and mine1 and mine1 and mine1 ,o yea1 ,who but my ,god could speak thus closely to me8 ,o ,buddha1 ,buddha1 trusted long in vain6 ,in whom ,i took my refuge once1 behold1 ,my house of refuge then supposed in thee ,is melted into ruin round about me4 ,i am a naked soul1 unhoused1 disclad2 ,o ,god1 receive me1 lo1 ,i come to ,thee2 ,forgive my sin that ,i have not believed ,earlier in ,christ thy ,son1 whom now ,i take ,to be my ,lord henceforth4 ,i trust to ,him ,to save me and ,i cannot save myself4 ,but ,he1 ,he can and will1 thanks to ,his name2 ,thanks to thy name1 ,lord ,jesus1 ,i am thine1 ,and ,thou art mine1 my ,savior as my ,lord6 ',where is my pride1 which was so dear to me1 ,my pride1 and my vain confidence of strength8 ,gone1 yea1 and my desire even gone to be ,myself my own redeemer and not owe ,redemption as a debt of gratitude ,to any2 sense of debt is sweet to me ,now1 and my heart is meekly glad to know ,that ,i henceforth am not my own1 but ,his ,who died to save me from myself and sin4 ,nirvna1 which ,i erst befooled myself ,to deem desirable1 what dreary doom ,were it6 ,instead of life1 and love1 and joy1 ,true peace1 and ever-springing gratitude ,growing greater every moment1 like a stream ,increasing every moment to the sea ,with fresh floods from fresh tributaries poured-- ,instead of this1 blank death and nothingness6 ,end unattainable1 ,i now can see1 ,even were it good4 ,to lose this power to think ,and suffer and enjoy1 to quench in night ,utter1 unending1 reason's starry lamp1 ,and hope's1 and memory's1 and be naught at all6 ,i shudder backward from the crumbling brink ,of such annihilation of myself ,imagined only1 and ,i eager spring ,endeavoring upward toward that different good ,assured to me and native now ,i know1 ,the prospect of eternal life with joy4' ,so ,krishna mused1 was grateful1 and aspired1 ,rescued from the abyss to hope of heaven4 ,but the new life of love within his heart1 ,of love and love's delicious gratitude1 ,swelled with sweet pain to unappeasable ,desire of vent and overflow in word ,or deed to testify itself abroad4 ,when1 the next day1 the daily trysting-time ,drew them that loved the ,lord together for prayer1 ,the ,indian1 who by fellow instinct now ,divined the secret of those gatherings1 came ,and sought to be admitted of the band4 ,they welcomed him with hospitable joy1 ,which borrowed tears from sorrow to express ,itself in silence when he spoke and said3 ,o friends1 receive me1 for ,i am of you1 ,redeemed by your ,redeemer1 ,christ the ,lord4 ,i love ,him1 and ,i know it is because ,he first loved me and taught me how to love4 ,this love that wells in me and overflows ,my being thus1 it is not mine ,i know1 ,but ,his1 or only as ,he makes it1 mine4 ,i love you all in ,him1 and feel that ye ,in ,him likewise love me4 ,he has unlocked ,the gates of speech2 ,he makes the dumb to speak4 ,and now ,i pray you tell me1 is there not ,some thing ye know1 some little thing perhaps1 ,for ,i am meek and lowly like a child ,and ,i do not aspire to things above ,my measure1 which indeed ,i know is small1 ,some little simple thing that ,i can do ,for ,jesus1 just because ,he wishes it ,and for no other reason in the world ,than only that1 to testify to ,him ,in act and testify to all that see ,how much ,i love ,him1 and how much desire ,to be henceforth ,his servant all in all8 ,i should be glad to do this if ,i might ,with no delay at all1 ,i am in haste4 ,i know from all that ,i have learned through you ,and from the lovely feeling in my heart1 ,this eager impulse to make haste and be ,the perfect image of your ,lord and mine-- ,i know thus that there is an endless joy ,before me of obedience to ,his will ,in beautiful behavior like ,his own ,and all conformity to what is fair ,whether in temper1 thought1 wish1 word1 or deed1 ,or whatsoever else is life or being-- ,a boundless possibility of bliss ,awaiting and inviting me--whereto ,all hail and welcome1 be my footsteps fleet ,to run forever up this shining way6-- ,yet am ,i not contented till ,i hear ,whether there be not bidden some thing besides ,of gracious privilege from ,christ to those ,who love ,him as ,i love ,him1 which such may1 ,in the first freshness of new birth1 at once ,do for an ease and comfort to their love4 ,wonder with gladness filled all hearts that heard1 ,when ,krishna1 he of words so slow and few1 ,flowed like a river thus from frost unbound4 ,and ,paul said3 ',be baptized1' ,lord ,jesus taught ,first privilege of obedience to ,his will ,in outward visible act offered to those ,who have before invisibly obeyed ,him inwardly and taken ,him for ,lord4 ,thou therefore1 brother1 if thou wilt1 shalt be ,forthwith baptized according to ,his word4 ,buried with ,him by baptism into death ,thou wilt be1 that as ,christ was from the dead ,raised by the glory of the ,father so ,thou also mayst henceforth forever walk ,in a new life4 ,within the spacious halls ,of ,publius there was found a laver large ,which1 by the master of the mansion put ,at ,paul's command1 with water pure was filled2 ,and therein ,krishna was straightway baptized4 ,but not by ,paul's hands4 ,for ,christ sent me forth1 ,he said1 not to baptize but to proclaim ,the gospel of obedience to mankind4 ,so ,aristarchus1 for that office named ,by ,paul1 baptized the ,indian4 ,he went down ,joyous into that liquid grave with ,christ ,to rise with ,him in resurrection thence4 ,because thou art disciple now become1 ,to ,krishna speaking1 ,aristarchus said1 ,and because ,christ hath so commanded us1 ,lo1 ,i baptize thee thus into the name1 ,the one name1 of the ,father1 of the ,son1 ,and of the ,holy ,ghost4 ,amen6 ,amen6 ,said ,krishna1 issuing from his watery tomb ,as one new-born like ,lazarus from the dead4 ,if thou1 then1 ,paul said1 taking ,krishna's hand ,for welcome1 ,if thou be indeed with ,christ ,risen from the dead1 ,i charge thee seek those things ,which are above where ,christ ascended sits ,on the right hand of ,god the ,father throned4 ,endeavor upward toward what heavenly is1 ,not suffer thine affection here to cling2 ,we must not grovel where we ought to climb4 ,reckon that when ,christ died thou diedst with ,him1 ,and that thy life is hid with ,christ in ,god4 ,when ,christ our life shall manifested be1 ,then manifested thou shalt be with ,him ,in glory4 ,for this life we live on earth ,is as the insect's life in chrysalis4 ,the creature shut in chrysalis awaits ,the promise of the sun's approach in spring2 ,the sun is his true life1 and when the sun ,returns rejoicing hither from the south1 ,then cracks the chrysalis that bound him in1 ,and1 blossoming out in wings1 he disimprisoned ,springs a new creature forth1 and sails abroad ,in beauty on the bosom of the air-- ,a living parable of that which we ,shall undergo of glorious change when ,christ1 ,our ,sun1 at ,his return revisits us4 ,haste1 then1 to put to death those things in thee1 ,pride1 unbelief1 self-will1 vain trust in self1 ,excess of self-regard1 whatever else ,belongs to this thine earthly state of being ,and cannot overlive into the life ,of glory to be thine forever in heaven-- ,all these things put to death1 and nourish rather ,faith1 hope1 love1 joy1 upward desire and pure1 ,the spirit of forgetfulness of self-- ,self-will become obedience unto ,god1 ,presumption changed to sweet humility1 ,thanksgiving like a fountain from the heart ,springing1 with a delicious tremble deep ,reflected to the center of the soul1 ,in eager exultation up to ,god3 ,these and like things are of the heavenly mind2 ,cherish them thou with heedful husbandry4 ,so shalt thou grow full-summed those buoyant wings ,which1 when ,christ comes again1 shall bear thee up ,to meet ,him in the air and soar with ,him ,immeasurable heights above all height ,into the heaven of heavens to be with ,god ,forever and forever safe in bliss4 ,dost thou ask1 ,how do this8 ,i answer thee1 ,be thy whole life obedience to ,his will ,who lived and died and lives forevermore ,to save thee ransomed by ,his blood from sin4 ,yea1 whatsoever thou henceforth shalt do1 ,whether in thought or word or deed1 do all ,not from thyself1 nor for thyself1 but all ,as living in the person and the name1 ,as living therein only1 of the ,lord ,jesus1 to ,god the ,father giving thanks ,by ,him4 ,and now to ,him that loved us1 ,him ,that washed us from our sins in ,his own blood1 ,and made us kings and priests to ,god ,his ,father-- ,to ,him dominion be1 and glory1 given ,for ever and for evermore6 ,amen6 ,krishna soon after came to ,paul and said3 ,the sense of resurrection power ,i feel ,within me working to sustain my will ,in striving upward as thou bidst toward ,god ,i take it as a warrant and a proof ,that ,christ lives and exerts it from above4 ,i need no longer any testimony ,other than what ,i have within myself1 ,that ,he rose from the dead to die no more4 ,this new life that is mine ,i draw from ,him2 ,it is because ,he lives ,i thus can live2 ,yet gladly would ,i hear from ,mary's lips 7,not now with curious ear1 and unbelief7 ,her story of the rising of the ,lord4 ,i wake not seldom in the depths of night1 ,a kind of leaven of light breaks through my sleep1 ,as if the glory of the ,lord around ,me made untimely morning for mine eyes4 ,better1 ,i trow1 than our good ,publius1 ,i shall peruse the daily prophecies ,of weather in the midnight wind and sky4 ,so he consents and ,i beforehand am ,with him in waking1 as ,i trust to be1 ,let me bring tidings when my vigils next ,discern the promise of a smiling dawn ,tempered to vernal warmth4 ,we then can meet1 ,as late the hint was1 ere the rising sun1 ,to hear from ,mary1 while the morning breaks ,and the fresh splendors of new-wakened day ,lighten the world1 how ,jesus over death ,triumphed1 and spoiled the princedom of the grave4 ,so it shall be1 my ,krishna1 ,paul said1 glad ,at heart that such desire1 so purified ,with faith1 and joy1 and sense of partnership ,in all things by the ,lord of life bestowed1 ,possessed the ,indian4 ,and the days went by4 ,,book ,,xx4 ,,euthanasy4 ,ruth and ,mary ,magdalen waking very early talk with one another having not yet risen1 and ,mary discloses a placid premonition that she has of her own imminent death4 ,they thus engaged1 a signal sound from without is heard in notes from ,stephen on his pipe4 ,the summons is for the meeting proposed to hear ,mary's story of the resurrection4 ,the company repair to a hilltop of easy access and goodly prospect1 where after a matin prayer from ,paul ,mary tells her story4 ,she has scarcely ended1 when she gently sinks in death4 ,paul on occasion of this speaks comfortingly1 not without tears of personal sorrow for ,mary's loss1 of the resurrection awaiting the dead in ,christ4 ,meantime ,simon the sorcerer having observed from a distance the meeting of the ,christians puts his own sinister interpretation on what occurred1 which1 so interpreted1 he reports1 to ,paul's disadvantage1 to ,felix and ,drusilla1 with suggestion of use that may be made of it in evidence against the apostle at ,rome4 ,at sunset of the same day the ,christians gather to the burial of ,mary on the spot where she died1 and ,paul describes the promised return of ,jesus to accomplish the triumphant rapture and resurrection of the saints4 ,,euthanasy4 ,the stars that with the setting of the sun ,rose in the east had climbed the highest heaven ,and from their top of culmination now ,with steadfast gaze were looking steeply down ,through spaces pure1 or lucid depths of sky ,pure as pure spaces1 blanched to perfect blue1 ,when ,mary1 waking1 softly spoke to ,ruth4 ,they in one chamber lodged1 and were so nigh ,each other in their couches side by side 7,with ,rachel also in close neighborhood7 ,that they could trust themselves to mutual speech ,if need were in the night or if the wish ,prompted1 nor hazard to disturb the rest ,wherein ,eunic1 nigh them both bestowed1 ,lay locked securely in those faster bonds ,which bind the young and innocent asleep4 ,ruth1 ,mary said1 so softly that the sound ,was like a pulse of silence1 art asleep8 ,nay1 all awake to hear what thou wouldst say1 ,ruth answered1 in a murmur soft as hers4 ,she had slept1 but she instantly awoke ,when ,mary scarcely more than thought her name4 ,this was the wont between them2 for ,ruth knew ,that her kinswoman ,mary bore her life ,but as a dewdrop trembling on a leaf ,that any little waft of wind may scatter2 ,and so she held herself even when she slept ,still in a kind of vigil not to miss ,a breath from ,mary that might call for her4 ,thou wilt not sorrow should ,i leave thee soon1 ,said ,mary1 with the tone of one who soothed ,far rather than of one who soothed would be4 ,i have a premonition that the end ,to me of things upon the earth is nigh4 ,thou knowest how frail the hold whereby ,i hold ,to life here and how ready ,i am to go ,hence whensoever ,he shall call my name1 ,as once ,he called it ,i remember well1 ,so call it yet again1 bidding me come4 ,i have wavered between this and that in thought2 ,now thinking3 ',he will surely hither soon ,return1 so as we saw ,him forty days ,after ,his resurrection wrapt in cloud ,ascending from the mount in ,galilee-- ,return1 and take us all unto ,himself2' ,but then again ,i think3 ',perhaps for me ,he will anticipate that destined hour ,and call me on a sudden thither hence4' ,let not mine ear be heavy if ,he call6 ,o ,ruth1 ,i think ,i have within my heart ,foretokening sent that ,he will call to-day2 ,a fluttering in my blood admonishes me4 ,i should be thankful if ,i might once more ,ere going bear some witness to ,his name6 ,for ,krishna's sake1 too2 ever a soul sincere ,he seemed to me1 but he would listen now ,with other ear1 eager to drink the truth4 ,yea1 and that may be1 ,ruth said1 not once more ,but often if the will of ,god be so4 ,god grant it6 ,for indeed ,i could but grieve ,to lose thee from my side2 grieve1 though ,i saw ,heaven open to receive thee1 as to ,stephen1 ,my ,stephen1 it opened--with the glory of ,god ,full shown ,him in the face of ,christ the ,lord6 ,yet so the weather promises this night ,the morning will1 ,i think1 be heavenly fair ,and mild1 and haply thou indeed shalt greet ,full soon thy wished-for chance of testimony4 ,thou wilt remember we were all to meet ,on such a morning as this sure will be ,and hear thee tell thy story of the ,lord's ,victorious resurrection from the dead ,just then when day is glorying over night4 ,those women with each other communing so1 ,the morning hastened1 and--now nigh to break ,full splendor but with brilliance soft and chaste ,over the welcoming world both land and sea-- ,mary and ,ruth1 with ,rachel at the sign ,awakening and ,eunic fresh as dawn1 ,heard from without a matin signal sound ,blown with the breath of ,stephen on his reed-- ,token of tryst by all well understood1 ,while secretly entrusted with a thrill ,to one heart that the others knew not of4 ,the ,indian joyful to his host had said3 ,i shall forestall thee1 ,o my ,publius1 ,i know it by my heart within me wise1 ,in hailing the selectest dawn to break1 ,and fittest1 for our meeting on the shore ,to hear from ,hebrew ,mary what she yet ,reserves to tell us of her rising ,lord3 ,so1 if thou please1 ,i will myself betimes ,awake thee when the hour ,i wait for comes4 ,publius thus roused1 he in his turn awaked ,stephen1 who rallied with his pipe the rest2 ,but ,paul1 with ,stephen in one chamber sleeping ,woke1 as his nephew woke1 when ,publius called4 ,the new wine of the vernal weather filled ,the golden cup of morning to the brim1 ,and those blithe wakers drank deep draughts of it2 ,but other morning bathed their souls with light4 ,they to a hill of gentle rise repaired ,that sloped its eastern side into the main ,thence rippling up in spiral terraces ,by playful ,nature round about it wound3 ,here goodly prospect over sea and shore1 ,from a well-sheltered seat1 invited them4 ,before they sat1 ,paul stretched his hands toward heaven ,and prayed3 ,thou who didst out of darkness make ,light dawn on chaos1 and who day by day ,dost kindle morning from the shades of night1 ,thanks to thy name for this fair spring of dawn6 ,dawn ,thou into our hearts1 and dayspring there ,make with the shining of thy face on us ,shown milder in the face of ,christ thy ,son6-- ,then1 to his fellows turning1 added this3 ,we owe it to ,krishna that we thus are here2 ,his wishes waked him1 and1 as was agreed1 ,he waked us that we might prevent the morn ,to celebrate the rising of the ,lord4 ,krishna knew not1 what yet by happy chance ,has now befallen1 if aught befall by chance1 ,that we1 upon the first day of the week ,meeting1 meet on the day when ,christ arose1 ,the ,lord's day1 day peculiarly ,his own4 ,we listen1 ,mary1 tell us of that morn4 ,then ,mary1 her fair face like morning1 white ,with pureness not with pallor1 spoke and said3 ,it was not hope1 nor faith--both faith and hope ,had died within us when our ,master died-- ,not hope1 not faith1 but love1 and memory1 ,and sorrow1 and desire to testify ,our sense of everlasting debt to ,him1 ,that1 early in the morning of the day ,third following the day wherein ,he suffered1 ,brought me--with ,mary1 ,james's mother1 joined-- ,likewise ,salom1 to the garden where ,they had laid ,him in a rock-hewn sepulcher4 ,we took sweet spices to embalm the flesh ,which late for robe the ,lord of life had worn4 ,we wondered as we went1 ',but who will roll ,the great stone back for us that closes up ,the doorway to the tomb8' ,yet went we on1 ,to find the stone already rolled away2 ,for there had been a mighty earthquake throe1 ,and a descended angel of the ,lord ,with easy strength in his celestial grace ,had rolled away the stone1 and on it sat4 ,his aspect was like lightning1 and snow-white ,his dazzling vesture shone4 ,the keepers shook1 ,the keepers that the ,jewish rulers set ,to watch the grave--these for sheer terror shook ,and sank into a helpless swoon like death4 ,but unto us that awful angel said3 ,ye1 fear not2 for ,i know ye come to seek ,jesus the crucified2 ,he is not here1 ,for ,he is risen according to ,his word4 ,come1 see the empty place where the ,lord lay4 ,i heard and saw with a bewildered wit2 ,and though ,i afterward remembered all1 ,i did not at the moment understand ,well anything save that the sepulcher ,was empty of the body of the ,lord4 ,this ,i told the disciples1 sorrowing3 ,i ran to tell them1 and they1 running1 came ,to find it so as ,i had made report4 ,those went away1 perplexed and sad at heart3 ,but as for me1 ,i lingered by the tomb ,and wept2 ,i could have wept my heart away4 ,i thought3 ',and so ,i may not even anoint-- ,there would be comfort1 something like a sense ,of healing to that holy wounded flesh1 ,if ,i might salve those dead wounds with sweet spice-- ,i may not even anoint ,his body dead6 ,they have taken it away1 ,i know not whither4 ,alas1 alas1 and woe is me6' ,my tears ,were falling like a shower of rain the while1 ,but ,i stooped weeping1 and with veiled eyes looked ,into the open sepulcher and saw ,two angels sitting there1 vested in white1 ,one at the head1 the other at the feet1 ,where late the body of the ,lord had lain4 ,it was a heavenly spectacle to see1 ,those shining-vested angels sitting there ,with posture so composed and face serene6 ,yet would ,i rather then have seen the ,lord1 ,or seen ,his body wounded from the cross2 ,but if those angels knew that this was so1 ,their blame of me was very gently spoken3 ',woman1 why weepest thou8' ,i sobbed reply3 ',because they have taken away my ,lord1 and where ,they have laid ,him ,i know not4' ,with that ,i turned ,me back1 ,i think ,i should have gone away1 ,but ,i saw one ,i knew not1 standing there1 ,who also spake1 ',woman1 why weepest thou8' ,distraught ,i took him for the gardener1 ,and half ,i did not see him for my tears1 ,and ,i made answer from my eager thought3 ',o1 sir1 if thou have borne ,him hence1 tell me ,where thou hast laid ,him and ,i will take ,him thence ,away4' ,then ,jesus1 for it ,jesus was1 ,uttered one word1 no more2 ',mary6' ,he said4 ,i turned toward ,him1 but all ,i said was this3 ',rabboni6' ,for it was a ,hebrew word ,sprang quickest to my lips2 ',master' it means-- ,this with a glance toward ,krishna ,mary said4 ,the ,indian dropped his eyes as with a kind ,of sudden conscious shame confusing him ,to feel her eyes that instant meet his own ,and know his own were charged with other look ,than ever woman drew from him before4 ,in her unconscious pure serenity1 ,mary--her momentary glance toward one1 ,in equal gaze on all together sheathed-- ,went on1 no pause1 yet with some air of muse ,tingeing her reminiscence as she said3 ,perhaps ,i had an impulse which the ,lord ,saw1 to assure myself with touch of hand ,or even to cling to ,him1 ,i hardly know2 ',nay1' ,he said tenderly1 ',i am not yet1' ,said ,he1 'ascended to the ,father2 thou1 ,go to my brethren and tell them that ,i ,ascend unto my ,father and your ,father ,and my ,god and your ,god4' ,and this ,i did4 ,o1 the deep joy1 the deep and solemn joy1 ,of knowing that the ,lord was risen indeed6 ,and the solemnity was almost more ,than even the joy2 we trembled and rejoiced4 ,he was so awful in ,his majesty ,after ,his rising from the dead6 ,yea1 sweet ,was ,he1 beyond all language to express2 ,but sweetness was with awfulness in ,him ,so qualified1 the sweetness could not be ,enough to overcome the awfulness2 ,gazing on ,him we trembled and rejoiced4 ,he forty days appeared and disappeared ,by turns before us1 passing through shut doors ,unhindered1 yet sometimes partaking food-- ,a paradox of spirit or of flesh1 ,the resurrection body of the ,lord6 ,ensample of our bodies that shall be1 ,and witness of the wondrous wisdom ,god's1 ,and power to work the counsels of ,his will ,by many secret potencies of things1 ,who spirit of matter could capacious make1 ,as matter make to spirit permeable6 ,those forty days in which ,he showed ,himself ,after such fashion to ,his chosen few ,nigh ended1 we withdrew to ,galilee ,where ,he appointed ,he would meet ,his own-- ,more than five hundred we were mustered there ,upon a mountain top that well we knew4 ,here ,he was glorious in majesty1 ,the ,son of ,god become from ,son of ,man2 ,hushed to obedient awe1 we heard ,him speak4 ,he said3 ',lo1 all authority is given ,to ,me1 whether in heaven or on the earth4 ,forth1 therefore1 ye1 among all nations go1 ,making disciples and baptizing them ,into the name1 the one name1 of the ,father1 ,and of the ,son1 and of the ,holy ,ghost2 ,teaching them to observe all things that ,i ,commanded you1 neglecting naught of all3 ,behold1 ,i am with you ever to the end4' ,thence to ,jerusalem and ,bethany4 ,here from a chosen spot on ,olivet ,jesus1 ,his hands uplifted as ,he blessed us1 ,rose heavenward1 but ,he blessed us still in rising1 ,until a cloud enwrapt ,him from our sight4 ,the upward look of ,mary saying this1 ,her fixd1 eager1 upward-yearning look1 ,failed1 and her face grew white as if the blood ,were shamed to stain that heavenly purity4 ,all saw the change she suffered1 and were awed4 ,mary's voice faltered1 but she brokenly ,went on in utterance such as if she spoke ,out of another world just reached from this3 ,that cloud--,i seem to see it now again-- ,or something swims between to dim my sight4 ,those angels said that ,he would yet return ,so as we saw ,him then ascend to heaven-- ,is ,he now come8 ,i hear as if a voice1 ,his1 ,his1 the same that in the garden spake ,to me calling my name1 ',mary6' ,it says ,now1 ',hither1 ,mary6' ,yea1 ,lord ,jesus1 ,i ,know ,thee1 and come4 ,at last6 ,at last6 ,farewell6 ,mary such words uttered with failing breath1 ,her eyes withdrawn from vision of things here4 ,her body--which in gentle rest reclined ,on her kinswoman ,ruth supporting her ,when her strength failed--she left1 winging her way ,hence1 as the lark soars from his groundling nest ,into the morning sky to meet the sun4 ,with a communicated quietude ,of spirit--which into their gesture passed ,making it seem habitual1 no surprise1 ,scarce sorrow1 hinted1 perturbation none1 ,but reverence and love ineffable-- ,not speaking1 ,ruth and ,rachel decently ,composed the body to a look of rest ,in sleep on the sweet earth1 the stainless sky ,bending in benediction over her ,and the bright sun just risen touching the face ,to an auroral beauty with his beams4 ,she has gone hence1 ,paul said1 to be with ,christ1 ,which is far better4 ,see the peace expressed ,in the unmoving hands on the stilled heart1 ,the form relapsed oblivious on the ground1 ,and the face fixed in transport of repose6 ,surpassing beauty6 ,but corruptible2 ,faint image of the beauty which shall be ,when this seed planted springs in heavenly bloom ,and mortal takes on immortality6 ,think when we sow this beauty in the dust1 ,that which we sow is earthly though so fair2 ,but that will be celestial which shall hence ,in the bright resurrection season spring4 ,ye know that when the husbandman entrusts ,his seed-grain to the soil he does not sow ,that body which shall be1 but kernels bare ,to which ,god gives a body as ,he will2 ,from the wheat sown there springs a blade of green ,unlike the wheat and far more beautiful4 ,so is the resurrection that awaits ,mary1 our sister2 this corruptible ,will put on incorruption in that day1 ,and ,christ will fashion it anew more fair1 ,after the body of ,his glory changed6 ,ye do not ask1 but some have doubting asked1 ',how are the dead raised up1 and in what form ,of body do they come8' ,not surely such ,as they within the tomb were laid away4 ,there sleeps a natural body in the dust2 ,there wakes a spiritual body purified ,from every imperfection of the flesh4 ,whatever glorious beauty here was worn ,is worn a changed more glorious beauty there4 ,his proper glory to the sun belongs1 ,and the moon has her glory1 and the stars ,each in his own peculiar glory shines3 ,the body of the resurrection so ,has its enduements proper to itself1 ,capacities1 adjustments1 attributes1 ,other than we know here--though shadowed forth ,obscurely in the body that the ,lord ,after ,his resurrection wore--such high ,transfigurations of the faculties ,belonging to the body of this flesh ,as man's imagination cannot dream6 ,o clay1 that late seemed ,mary6--and therewith ,the tears that would not longer be stayed back ,burst from ,paul's eyes and fell a sunlit shower1 ,while all the rest beholding wept with ,paul-- ,form1 for her sake1 our well-belovd1 dear1 ,must we then leave thee in the dust of earth8 ,but not as thus we leave thee wilt thou rise6 ,thou in corruption wilt lie waiting here1 ,but thou shalt rise1 to incorruption changed2 ,thou wilt sleep darkling underneath the clod1 ,but thence in glory shalt thou waking burst2 ,in weakness buried1 thou shalt rise in power4 ,mary the image of the earthy bore1 ,she shall the image of the heavenly bear3 ,comfort yourselves1 belovd1 with such hope4 ,paul these triumphal words of prophecy ,uttered with streaming tears that testified ,the sorrow in him at the heart of joy2 ,and they all wept with ,paul1 in fellowship ,of pathos at sweet strife with glorying hope4 ,a little leave for silent tears1 and ,paul ,said3 ,bide ye here until the evenfall1 ,or some of you by turns as need of rest1 ,of food1 of change1 allows the privilege ,of watching by this sacred dust asleep4 ,i will meantime desire from ,publius ,permission to prepare her resting-place ,for ,mary here upon the selfsame spot ,that she has hallowed for us by dying here2 ,and we at set of sun will bury her4 ,now ,publius had1 with ,sergius ,paulus too1 ,and ,krishna--those1 and the centurion-- ,silently1 in that silent time of tears1 ,retired2 they with one instinct felt that here ,were love and grief that needed privacy ,from witness even of moistened eyes like theirs4 ,but ,krishna went apart from all1 and bowed ,himself together motionless and wept4 ,while those sat weeping1 and these last withdrew ,refraining not the sympathetic tear1 ,a different scene passed elsewhere in the isle4 ,simon1 the sorcerer1 sought and found access ,to ,felix and ,drusilla and said to them3 ,i roused this night an hour before the dawn1 ,my sleep disturbed with signs in dreams of you4 ,some secret prescience urged me out of doors1 ,and ,i went wandering forth with no clear thought ,whither1 but felt my footsteps onward drawn1 ,until ,i gained an overlooking height ,of hill1 whence1 ranging round me with mine eyes1 ,i saw a dozen people more or less1 ,women as seemed with men1 a motley train1 ,walking thus early1 why ,i could not guess2 ,they tended toward a hillock neighboring mine4 ,i1 heeding to be hid from them the while1 ,crept up as near them as ,i safely could4 ,paul was among them1 chief1 though not the guide ,as guide our worthy friend ,sir ,publius served4 ,that ,sergius ,paulus1 with his ,indian friend1 ,krishna they call him1 the centurion too1 ,were of the company2 as for the rest1 ,count up the tale of ,paul's companionship1 ,they were all there4 ,after these reached the point ,where they made pause1 the first thing that befell ,was ,paul in menace lifting up those hands ,of his and therewith muttering magic words4 ,i could not hear them1 but the tone ,i knew1 ,as too ,i knew that gesture of the hands4 ,i thought of how he conjured with his spell ,of uncouth baleful words at ,csarea6 ,paul got all seated2 but one sat apart1 ,the destined victim of his wicked wiles1 ,a woman she1 that ,mary ,magdalen1 ,like an accused impaled to make defence4 ,paul seemed to say to her1 ',speak1 if thou wilt1' ,whereon the woman with a pleading voice1 ,but hopeless1 breaking into moan at last1 ,made her apology--of course in vain4 ,the spell that ,paul had cast upon her wrought1 ,and she sank lifeless at his feet4 ,so once ,a spell from ,peter at ,jerusalem ,with ,ananias and ,sapphira wrought ,killing them out of hand4 ,but wherefore this8 ,drusilla doubted4 ,also wherefore that8 ,real reason1 or pretended1 wilt thou have8 ,said ,simon with his air of oracle4 ,both1 said ,drusilla shortly1 answering him4 ,well1 the pretended reason1 ,simon said1 ,to ,peter1 was hot zeal for righteousness4 ,seems ,ananias and ,sapphira lied2 ,a venial lie1 they set a little short ,the price they had received for certain lands ,or other property sold by them late ,in the behoof of ,peter and his crew4 ,peter would none of that2 the revenues ,to be extorted from his dupes would shrink ,with such prevarications once in vogue3 ,there hast thou the real reason for his crime4 ,as for this last case1 ,paul's1 ,i can but guess ,what his pretended reason was4 ,indeed ,perhaps pretended reason there was none4 ,it may be he preferred to have it seem1 ,to all except his special followers1 ,a case of sudden death from natural cause4 ,or again1 likelier1 he alleged some crime ,against her1 sacrilege or blasphemy1 ,secret1 thence lacking proof but capable ,of being proved upon her by his art4 ,he would pronounce a spell of magic power1 ,then let her talk and try to clear herself3 ,meanwhile1 if she were guilty as he thought1 ,the spell would work and punish her with death1 ,but remain harmless were she innocent4 ,guesses1 but plausible2 still it would be ,sufficiently like ,paul if he devised ,a blank mere demonstration for the sake ,of those outside spectators of the scene1 ,simply in order to impress on them ,his power in magic1 and win their applause4 ,it would at the same time inspire with awe ,those dupes of his1 and faster bind their bonds4 ,yet a particular reason intermixed ,doubtless with general motives for his crime2 ,some insubordination1 it may be1 ,on ,mary ,magdalen's part toward him1 ,had stung him to inflict this punishment4 ,what of it all8 ,drusilla coldly said4 ,nothing1 said ,simon2 just a pretty tale6 ,only ,i thought it might perhaps subserve ,lady ,drusilla's purpose yonder at ,rome1 ,to have a crime convenient to her hand1 ,a fresh crime1 and a flagrant1 she could charge ,to ,paul's account to make more sure his doom4 ',why1 aye1' ,drusilla thought1 'one that involves ,sergius ,paulus1 renegade1 and that ,too complaisant centurion1 the whole crew ,indeed present to be spectators there ,and not protesting1 hence accomplices ,all of a crime they might have stayed in act4 ,as to the matter of a sudden death ,with circumstance attending such and such1 ,surplus of testimony was to hand ,for that2 as to the matter of the means ,employed1 magic--,simon magician was1 ,and he1 as expert witness1 should suffice4 ,if any question as to him arose1 ,drusilla should be equal to the need2 ,i would vouch for him to the emperor4 ,nothing would please me better than to try ,on him the virtue of my sponsorship6' ,so the proud woman swiftly in mute muse ,slid to the goal she wished4 ,nay1 scarce a pause ,seeming to have occurred before she spoke1 ,already had her formless thought forecast ,the triumphs over ,nero she would win ,with her voluptuous beauty wielded so ,as she could wield it through her equal wit1 ,when she to ,simon answered absently3 ,true1 worthy ,simon2 something such might chance2 ,be ready to make good at need thy part4 ,this as dismissal2 and the sorcerer went4 ,felix had moody sat with never a word4 ,and now the cloudless splendor of the day ,was softly toward a cloudless sunset waned1 ,when round an open grave upon that hill ,were gathered those who mourned for ,mary dead2 ,publius was there1 and ,julius1 with the rest4 ,they with all reverence lifted the fair form1 ,wrapped round about with linen clean and white1 ,and laid it like a seed within the ground2 ,they spread it with a coverlet of soil ,which falling through the farewell sunset beams ,seemed leavened to lie more lightly on the dead3 ,the earth with such a treasure in her breast ,was sweeter1 and they almost yearned toward it4 ,yet upward rather soon they turn their eyes ,as once those upward gazed in ,galilee ,seeing their ,lord ascend in cloud to heaven-- ,while thus ,paul1 he too thither looking1 said3 ,concerning her who sleeps here1 think aright2 ,for we must sorrow not as others do ,who have no hope4 ,we have a hope4 ,our hope ,is1 that if ,jesus died and rose again1 ,even so them likewise who in ,jesus sleep ,will ,god bring with ,him4 ,yea1 ,i say to you ,by the command and promise of the ,lord ,if we survive to see the ,lord return ,we shall not so forestall our sleeping friend ,in springing toward ,him as ,he hither comes4 ,for with a shout the ,lord ,himself from heaven ,will hither come descending with the voice ,of the archangel and the trump of ,god4 ,first shall those dead in ,christ arise1 and then ,we1 if we linger living till ,he come1 7,transfigured in the twinkling of an eye ,when the trump sounded to our heavenly guise7 ,will be with them together in the clouds ,caught up in instant rapture from the earth ,to meet the ,lord descended in the air3 ,so shall we be forever with the ,lord4 ,with these things comfort ye yourselves1 and each ,comfort the other4 ,and all comfort me6 ,paul added1 with a breaking voice1 and tears2 ,but quick he rallied for those others' sake ,and his victorious tone recovered quite1 ,looking down1 like a warrior on a foe ,trampled into the dust beneath his feet-- ,so looking down upon that vanquished grave1 ,paul almost chanted in heroic rhythm ,this lyric exultation calmed to praise3 ,o death1 where is thy sting8 ,thy victory where1 ,o grave8 ,thanks be to ,god who giveth us1 ,through our ,lord ,jesus ,christ1 the victory6 ,paul indeed craved the touch of human love1 ,to stay him with a healing sense of help1 ,and medicine to sorrow2 but in part ,it was for his companions' own behoof ,he had desired their fellowship of cheer2 ,he knew well that to comfort was of all ,ways the way surest to be comforted4 ,,book ,,xxi4 ,,arrival4 ,the day following1 the shipwrecked company embark on a vessel that had wintered at ,melita and sail for ,puteoli4 ,the islanders give ,paul and his companions a grateful farewell of good wishes and of presents for their cheer4 ,with ,felix and ,drusilla goes as a fresh addition to their train a ,phrygian runaway slave whom ,syrus1 a young slave of ,felix's1 has befriended and has devised thus to get safely to ,rome4 ,stephen is made confidant of this plan1 and becoming interested in the runaway introduces him to ,paul4 ,the foot journey from ,puteoli to ,rome is accomplished1 the approach to that city being made along the ,appian ,way4 ,various reflections are inspired in ,paul by this experience and by the sight of the metropolis itself4 ,at ,rome1 the ,phrygian runaway slave goes to ,paul's quarters1 merged in the daily concourse that throngs thither to hear the gospel4 ,having been converted1 he is encouraged by ,paul to return to his master4 ,this he finally does1 carrying with him a letter from ,paul4 ,the result is1 that the slave at the wish of the master comes joyfully back to ,rome and devotes himself to the loving service of ,paul4 ,,arrival4 ,a trireme that had wintered in the isle-- ,by stress of weather hindered in her way ,from ,egypt to the shores of ,italy-- ,refitted now was ready to pursue ,her destined voyage to ,puteoli4 ,the master's thought had been to put to sea ,that selfsame day whose beamy morn beheld ,the meeting on the hill in ,melita2 ,but the centurion intervened to bid ,delay the sailing yet another day3 ,his mind was with his prisoners to embark ,himself on that ,egyptian ship for ,rome2 ,and1 partly out of kindly complaisance ,toward ,paul1 and partly from a sympathy ,unconscious1 or ashamed and unconfessed ,of interest in the tale that ,mary told1 ,he would not let the purposes he knew ,engaged the ,christians for that morn be crossed4 ,the morrow morn full early they put forth ,on a smooth sea beneath a smiling sky4 ,a concourse of the grateful islanders ,flowed to the quay with signals of farewell ,and blessing and with honors manifold ,lavished on ,paul and for ,paul's sake on them ,that with him sailed2 nor only eager words ,brought they and tears of reverence and of love1 ,but bounty in unbounded store of all ,things needful to sustain those travellers' cheer4 ,so1 sail and oar1 they steered for ,syracuse2 ,there for three days they tarried1 and thence north ,warping their way in variance with the wind ,touched ,rhegium where another day they bide4 ,then1 the south blowing1 they once more set sail ,and the next day attained ,puteoli4 ,of those who sailed on that good ship for ,rome ,were ,felix and ,drusilla with their train2 ,and their train was1 by one addition1 more ,than when the shipwreck cast them on the isle4 ,this was a slave1 a ,phrygian runaway1 ,out of ,coloss strayed to ,melita ,but in his wish and purpose aimed for ,rome3 ,he should be safely lost in multitude ,drowned in the depths of that metropolis4 ,the shifty ,syrus1 fond of his device1 ,and not without true kindness in his heart1 ,meeting the fugitive had befriended him4 ,onesimus--such name the bondman bore-- ,he wisely warned that1 wandering unattached ,and destitute 7for spent long since was all ,he had in starting from his lord purloined71 ,he advertised himself for what he was1 ,a vagrant slave1 and ran a needless risk4 ,attach thyself1 said ,syrus1 to the train ,of my lord ,felix2 ,i will manage it ,he shall receive thee2 he delights in pomp ,and show as does ,drusilla too his spouse1 ,and they would gladly swell their retinue ,with one head more to make them great at ,rome4 ,this gets thee thither whither thou wouldst go2 ,once there1 thou quittest at thine own good will ,thy dear adoptive master's service--no ,exchanges of farewells betwixt you twain-- ,and hast thy freedom1 safe of course from him1 ,lord ,felix1 who will have no claim on thee1 ,and well removed from fear of thine own lord4 ,he added in pathetic humor half3 ,remember ,syrus when thou art thine own ,and hast perhaps some small peculium gained1 ,and in turn help who freely now helps thee4 ,onesimus1 so doing as ,syrus planned ,his part1 was reckoned of lord ,felix slave1 ,and on that vessel sailed with him to ,rome4 ,now that which ,syrus had1 on ,stephen's behalf ,and on ,eunic's1 done and dared1 the day ,that ,felix in his lust threatened to them ,in his own house in ,melita such harm-- ,this1 ,stephen in time had come to know2 nor ceased ,thenceforth to wish that he might recompense ,in some kind to the bondman his good will4 ,his grateful wish ,stephen had signified ,to ,syrus1 which emboldened him in turn ,to make the ,hebrew youth a confidant ,of his devices for ,onesimus4 ,thus ,stephen with ,onesimus had talked2 ,not often1 for need was that all should be ,transacted as in secret to avoid ,felix's1 more1 ,drusilla's1 jealous watch-- ,not often but so many times as served ,to yield some true impression to the youth ,of what the slave was in his manhood's worth1 ,and to inflame a generous desire ,of rescue for him to a nobler life4 ,stephen spoke of ,onesimus to ,paul1 ,and ,paul on shipboard came to speech with him4 ,the runaway's heart was wholly won to ,paul2 ,and ere those parted at ,puteoli ,onesimus had gladly promised ,stephen ,to seek his uncle out1 arrived in ,rome4 ,a sequel thence redounded to the slave ,of boundless blessing he had dreamed not of2 ,likewise of good to men in every age ,wherever might be found fit soul to be ,ennobled to the touch of noble thought1 ,in answerable style with nobleness ,conveyed1 and purified fine feeling1 borne ,to perfect heavenly-mindedness yet sweet ,and tender with a pulsing human love4 ,for ,felix and ,drusilla1 disembarked1 ,no welcome waited and no warm godspeed2 ,they went their ,romeward way in lonely state1 ,the showiest that in their impoverished plight ,they could make shift to invest themselves withal4 ,but ,paul with his companions1 good heart's cheer ,met at ,puteoli2 a brotherhood ,of lovers greeted them and bade them bide ,seven days for rest and for refreshment there3 ,the kindly ,julius suffered this to them ,for ,paul's sake easily1 seeing to ,paul he owed ,his own life snatched from those shipwrecking waves4 ,a week of opportunity it was ,to ,paul for service of his fellow-men2 ,for he most rested when he labored most1 ,unhindered1 with the joy of harvest his1 ,winning men to the obedience of his ,lord4 ,fed with a full refection of such toil ,and gladdened with the cordial dearest to him1 ,comfort of love from mutual human hearts1 ,the prisoner apostle1 those seven days ,ended1 was ready to move on toward ,rome4 ,dusty and weary footing many a mile ,to him and to his fellow-prisoners1 ,as to those willing sharers of his lot1 ,lay stretched before them on the ,roman road4 ,eastward a stage by the ,campanian ,way ,to ,capua--city famous then as since ,for lulling in her too luxurious lap ,to loss of manhood in enervate sloth ,those warriors who1 with the great ,hannibal ,for leader1 late had spurned the barrier ,alps1 ,thence1 like a loosened avalanche1 had fallen ,on ,italy--and might have taken ,rome6 ,a different conqueror now in captive's chains ,was marching on that world-metropolis3 ,no battle of the warrior would he wage1 ,with confused noise and garments rolled in blood2 ,yet wrested from the ,csars ,rome should be ,and from the empire of her gods no gods6 ,from ,capua northwestward breaking sharp1 ,the ,way1 now ,appian from ,campanian1 led ,over the stream ,vulturnus2 then across ,savo to ,sinuessa by the sea2 ,onward thence1 climbing the ,falernian hills ,vine-clad1 until the ,massic1 last of these1 ,descended on their northward-sliding slope1 ,shut off behind the wayfarers their view ,of the bright summit of ,vesuvius 7,his fiery heart uneasily asleep7 ,and the blue circlet of the ,lucrine ,lake4 ,like a stream flooded level with its banks1 ,the ,appian ,way was filled from side to side ,with travel flowing double to and fro4 ,now centuries of soldiers1 foot or horse1 ,clanged iron hoof or heel with rhythmic beat ,along the bedded rock that paved their way2 ,now pomps of embassy in various garb1 ,returning from their suits at ,csar's feet ,or thither tending vexed with hope or fear2 ,then some gay reveller to ,bai bound1 ,behind his foaming steeds urged ever on1 ,dashed in his biga down the crowded road ,and recked not what might meet his whirling wheels2 ,next1 moving slowly in more solemn state-- ,outriders either hand and nigh before-- ,the chariot of some rich patrician rolled ,who sought the spring of southern ,italy3 ,huge wains there were1 that creaked along the way ,laden with beasts from ,afric or from ,ind1 ,lions and tigers1 and hyenas dire2 ,these--destined to dye red1 perhaps with blood ,of human ravin1 the arena sands ,of mighty amphitheaters1 a feast ,of foul and fell delight to avid eyes ,of ,roman lords and ladies gathered there ,with scum and dross plebeian to behold-- ,now winked and glared behind their prison-bars ,or frothed and fretted out their fierce disdain4 ,luxurious litters borne of sinewy slaves-- ,who softly eased them1 bending as they went ,with well-timed flexure and compliant gait ,their supple knees in perfect unison-- ,were thickly sown between1 with ladies fair ,reposing in them sunk in silk and down1 ,or senators of ,rome effeminate2 ,besides1 were foot-wayfarers1 motley groups ,or single1 messengers that hasted post1 ,slaves trusted by their masters to convey ,letters of import out of lands remote ,to ,rome or out of ,rome abroad2 with those1 ,idlers and loiterers sauntering without aim1 ,vomit from ,rome or current thither sucked1 ,freemen1 but of the dregs of populace ,and shameless feeders at the public crib4 ,beholding all this various spectacle ,of life lived wholly without ,god1 and vain1 ,paul sighed in spirit and thought3 ',the world1 the world6 ,how vast and dreadful1 overshadowing all6 ,how strong and dreadful1 dominating all6 ,kingdom and usurpation in the earth6 ,what power shall overthrow thee1 so enthroned ,as thou art at the center of all things ,in ,rome1 and wielding1 thou unshaken there1 ,thence wielding all the shaken universe ,implement in thy hand to wreak thy will8 ,appalling6 ,yea1 yet am ,i not appalled4 ,be of good cheer1 said ,jesus1 then when ,he ,seemed to be sinking vanquished by the world1 ,even then1 ,be of good cheer1 said ,he1 lo1 ,i ,have overcome the world4 ,o1 hollow show ,and mockery of power browbeating me6 ,browbeaten am ,i not1 though in myself ,nothing1 nay1 less than nothing1 vanity4 ,there is ,one in me who is mightier far ,than is that mighty who is in the world4 ,not carnal are the weapons of my war2 ,but potent through my ,god they yet shall prove ,unto the pulling down of all strong holds1 ,and false imaginations of the minds ,of men1 with every overweening high ,thing that exalts itself against the ,lord6 ',but1 ,o1 the streams of men that blinded go1 ,one secular procession perishing1 ,endlessly on and on1 from age to age1 ,in every race and clime--that blinded go ,in sadness or with madcap songs of mirth ,frightfully toward the brink and precipice ,beetling sheer over the abyss profound ,of hopeless utter last despair and death-- ,for whom ,christ died6 ,shall ,he have died in vain8 ,forbid it ,god6 ,was it not promised ,him ,that he should of the travail of ,his soul ,see and be satisfied8 ,my soul with ,his ,travails in infinite desire to save2 ,give ,thou me children in my bonds at ,rome6 ,o ,god1 my ,god1 hear me herein ,i pray6' ,enlarged in heart with such desire and prayer ,and lifted high in hope of what would be1 ,paul walked as one with feet above the ground ,unconsciously buoyed up to tread the air4 ,but ,god had further cheer in store for him4 ,at ,appii ,forum and the ,taverns ,three1 ,two several stations on the ,appian ,way1 ,there met him out of ,rome two companies ,of brethren who1 while he abode those days ,guest at ,puteoli1 had heard of him ,as ,romeward faring1 and had come thus far ,to bring him greeting and good cheer4 ,they vied ,with one another1 those two companies1 ,in joyful rivalry of love to see ,which should speed faster farther forth1 and come ,first with their plight of loyalty to ,paul4 ,divided thus1 their welcome doubled was ,in worth and in effect to him who now ,thanked ,god and took fresh heart4 ,so on to ,rome4 ,the city1 from the summit of a hill ,surmounted1 of the ,alban range1 hill hung ,with villas and with villages1 was seen1 ,a huge agglomerate of building heaved ,above the level campagna1 circuit wide ,by the blue ,sabine mountains bounded north ,with lone ,soracte in ,etruria shown-- ,streets of bright suburbs1 gardens1 aqueducts ,confused about the walls on every side4 ,between long rows of stately sepulchers ,illustrious with memorial names inscribed1 ,the ,scipios1 the ,metelli1 many more-- ,each name a magic spell to summon up ,the image of the greatness of the ,rome ,that had been--ranged along the ,appian ,way1 ,slowly they passed1 ,paul with his train1 unmarked4 ,through throngs of frequence serried ever dense ,and denser with the confluence of the tides ,of travel and of traffic intermixed1 ,pedestrian1 and equestrian1 and what rolled ,in chariots1 splendid equipage1 or mean1 ,entering and issuing at the city gate-- ,slowly1 thus hindered1 on they urged their way4 ,at last they--passing by the ,capene port ,under an arch of stone forever dewed ,and dripping through its grudging pores with ooze ,as of cold sweat wrung out by agony ,to bear the great weight of the aqueduct ,above it--were within the ,servian ,wall4 ,on their left hand the ,aventine1 they wound ,about the ,coelian by its base2 traversed ,a droop of hollow to the ,palatine2 ,over the gentle undulation named ,velia next passing 7where1 ere many years1 ,the arch of ,titus would erect its pride ,to glory over ,jerusalem destroyed672 ,hence down the ,sacred ,way into the famed ,forum1 where stood that milestone golden called ,which rayed out roads to all the provinces1 ,and was as if the navel of the world4 ,all round them here great architecture rose1 ,temples1 basilicas1 long colonnades1 ,triumphal arches1 amphitheaters1 ,aqueducts vaulting with colossal spring ,as if in huge ,cyclopean sport across ,from pier to pier of massive masonry2 ,stupendous spectacle6 but over all1 ,to ,paul's eye1 one sole legend written large1 ,not ,rome's majestic history and power1 ,but her abjectness in idolatry2 ,rome's captive pitied her1 and would have saved6 ,crowning the summit of the ,capitoline1 ,the palace of the ,csars wide outspread1 ,a wilderness of building1 hung in view4 ,to ,burrus1 the prtorian prefect1 here ,in due course ,julius gave his prisoners up2 ,but ere he deemed himself acquitted quite ,of his debt due to ,paul he gained for him ,from ,burrus1 a just man1 the privilege ,of living as in free captivity ,in quarters of his own1 at small remove ,from the prtorium yet in privacy4 ,with ,paul abode his sister and her son2 ,ruth nigh at hand with her ,eunic lodged-- ,protected1 for again from these not far ,the faithful ,luke and ,aristarchus dwelt4 ,a season the disciples of the ,lord ,in ,rome supplied to all their frugal needs2 ,but each one had some handicraft or skill ,which soon found chance and scope to exercise ,itself to purpose2 and with cheerful toil ,in thankfulness they earned their daily bread4 ,two years long here1 as late in ,csarea1 ,paul waited on the wanton whim of power2 ,a prisoner in chains1 accused of crime1 ,and even the right of trial still denied4 ,yet1 though both night and day1 asleep1 awake1 ,bound to a ruthless ,roman soldier arm ,to arm1 he1 the great heart1 the spacious mind1 ,was not uncomforted1 not void of joy3 ,he had at full his fellowship of love1 ,and1 better1 he could freely preach his ,lord4 ,besides1 whatever soldier guarded him1 ,that soldier1 if his heart was capable ,at all of gentleness for any cause ,toward any one1 was softened toward this man ,whom he felt ever strangely toward himself ,as toward one not so happy in his lot ,considerate1 regardful1 pitiful2 ,and whom not seldom1 with a sweet constraint ,persuaded or compelled1 he listened to ,telling him of a ,savior that could save ,even to the uttermost1 therefore also him4 ,as loyal lover of his nation1 ,paul ,invited to give audience to his cause ,first his compatriots judged the chief in ,rome4 ,he told them that1 albeit he had appealed ,to ,csar from his fellow-countrymen1 ,yet had he naught to accuse his nation of4 ,paul's hearers on their part had had1 they said1 ,no word against him from ,jerusalem4 ,they added3 ,we would hear thee speak thy mind2 ,as for this party of the ,nazarene1 ,that everywhere we know is spoken against4 ,so they appointed ,paul a day to speak1 ,and in full frequence to his lodgings came4 ,all the day long from morn to evenfall ,he held discourse to them1 and testified ,the kingdom come on earth of ,god1 and ,him1 ,the ,king1 ,christ ,jesus2 with persuasions drawn ,from ,moses and from all the prophets old4 ,divided were his hearers2 some elect ,believed1 but others disbelieved4 ,to these ,paul solemnly denounced the prophecy ,of sad ,isaiah to his countrymen ,that seeing they should see and not perceive2 ,then added3 ,witness now1 ,i make you know ,that the salvation sent by ,god in vain ,to you turns to the ,gentiles2 they will hear4 ,thenceforward daily1 streams of concourse flowed ,unhindered1 bondmen1 freemen1 to ,paul's doors1 ,and heard while ,god's ambassador in chains ,besought them to be reconciled to ,god4 ,the million slaves of the metropolis ,were as a subterranean city ,rome1 ,substruction to the mighty capital4 ,here undercurrent rumor to and fro ,from mouth to mouth or haply in dumb sign ,transmitted--cipher unintelligible ,save to the dwellers of that underworld-- ,ran swift and secret as by telegraph ,and everywhither messages conveyed4 ,onesimus thus learned where ,paul abode1 ,and what a tide set daily toward him there ,of eager audience for the things he taught3 ,the bondman threw himself upon the tide1 ,and was borne by it whither he would go4 ,hearing good tidings meant for such as he1 ,decree of manumission for the slave1 ,he joyful freeman of the ,lord became4 ,freeman and bondman both at once was he-- ,free from the hateful service of himself1 ,and bond of love to serve his ,savior ,lord4 ,this his new loyalty ,paul put to proof ,extreme1 proposing to the runaway ,return to his ,colossian servitude2 ,paul would test also the obedient faith ,of the wronged master of the fugitive4 ,when ,syrus learned this from ,onesimus1 ,he1 wary1 with a much-importing shrug ,of shoulder1 warned his friend betimes beware4 ,the young disciple by such whispered fears ,was somewhat shaken in his faithful mind2 ,he failed a moment from his first good will ,to do as prompted his new heart and ,paul4 ,but at the last he was persuaded quite2 ,yet rather by the spectacle itself ,of that apostle willingly in chains ,for ,jesus than by any words he spoke3 ,he fixed to go back to his master4 ,paul ,gave him a letter for that master1 sealed4 ,now ,paul well knew the master1 but of this ,he wisely to ,onesimus said naught4 ,philemon was his name2 he had by ,paul ,been won to be a brother in the ,lord4 ,how knowest thou what is in that letter8 so ,syrus1 with honest scruple1 asked his friend4 ,paul is a good man1 aye2 but good men need ,money in ,rome to serve themselves withal4 ,he makes a merit of returning thee ,haply and in his letter claims reward ,which thou thyself shalt pay with servitude ,exacted henceforth heavier than before-- ,besides the stripes and brands for runaways4 ,thou hast thy freedom1 keep it1 and be wise4 ,onesimus was wise1 but he went back2 ,onesimus was wise2 yea1 and he kept ,his freedom also1 double freedom kept1 ,of spirit as of flesh1 though he went back4 ,this was the letter which the bondman bore3 ,paul1 prisoner of ,christ ,jesus1 and with him ,timotheus the brother1 to our friend ,belovd and our fellow-laborer1 ,philemon2 and to ,appia the sister2 ,and to our fellow-soldier of the truth1 ,archippus2 and to all the church with thee3 ,grace unto you and peace in plenteous store1 ,from ,god our ,father and ,his ,son our ,lord6 ',i never cease pouring out thanks to ,god ,for thee1 my brother1 in my daily prayers2 ,i hear such tidings of thy faith and love ,toward our ,lord ,jesus and toward all ,god's own4 ,i pray thy faith may multiply itself ,richly in others1 and of influence prove ,to spread the knowledge everywhere abroad ,of all the good in us to work for ,christ4 ,joy have ,i and sweet comfort in thy love1 ,because ,god's people oft have been in heart ,cheered by thee1 brother4 ,so1 albeit ,i might ,boldly in the authority of ,christ ,enjoin upon thee what is seemly1 yet ,for love's sake ,i beseech thee rather1 ,i1 ,being such as ,paul the aged1 prisoner now ,of ,jesus ,christ--beseech thee for my son ,whom ,i have late begotten in my bonds1 ,onesimus2 unprofitable once ,to thee but now to thee and me alike ,found profitable4 ,i have sent him back-- ,him have sent back1 that is1 mine own heart sent2 ,i fain myself had kept him with me here ,to minister to me in thy stead1 while ,i ,for preaching the glad tidings wear these bonds2 ,but ,i would nothing do without thy mind ,in order that thy kindness may not be ,as of compulsion but of free good will4 ,who knows but in ,god's grace and wisdom he ,was parted from thee for a little time ,that thou mightst have him for thine own forever1 ,as slave no longer1 but above a slave1 ,brother belovd now1 greatly to me1 ,but how much more to thee1 both in the flesh ,and in the ,lord6 ,if then a partner's place ,i hold in thy regard1 receive thou him ,even as myself4 ,if he have wronged thee aught1 ,or anywise have fallen in debt to thee1 ,put that to mine account4' ,until these words1 ,paul had let ,stephen catch with ear alert ,what issued hastening from his fervid lips1 ,and fix it on the parchment with swift hand4 ,but now himself he seized the pen and wrote ,as so to make his promise fast and good4 ',put that to mine account1' he wrote2 ',i1 ,paul1 ,write this with mine own hand2 ,i will repay ,thee2 for ,i would not say to thee that thou ,owest to me thy very self besides4 ,yea1 brother'--now by ,stephen's hand once more-- ,let me have joy of thee in ,christ the ,lord2 ,comfort thou me in ,him4 ,i write to thee ,in fullest faith of thine obedient heed2 ,thou wilt go even beyond my word ,i know4 ,moreover ,i have hope to be thy guest ,erelong2 make ready for me2 through the prayers ,of you belovd all1 ,i trust to come4 ,epaphras1 fellow-prisoner of mine ,in ,jesus ,christ1 sends greeting to thee2 ,mark ,likewise1 and ,aristarchus1 ,demas1 ,luke1 ,my fellow-laborers1 wish thee health and peace4 ,the grace of our ,lord ,jesus ,christ abide ,a guestship with your spirit evermore6' ,the generous trust ,paul staked upon him found ,philemon worthy1 or him worthy made4 ,at first he frowned on his returning slave1 ,who shrank before him1 conscious of his fault4 ,but in the truth and secret of their hearts1 ,master and bondman toward each other yearned4 ,either remembered what before had been1 ,the wont of mutual human-heartedness ,which1 between such as they1 could not but spring ,to blossom in kind offices exchanged ,to make the bond of master and of slave ,unnatural though it was yet tolerable4 ,philemon1 less in anger and despite ,than in love disappointed and aggrieved1 ,was ready to burst out upon the youth ,in loud upbraidings of his gracelessness ,to have made his master such return for all ,the kindness he had tasted in his house2 ,whereto ,onesimus would have replied ,with protestations of his penitence ,and tears of promise never to offend ,again a master so magnanimous2 ,but when ,philemon broke the letter's seal ,and read what ,paul had written1 his eyes swam ,and his heart melted and he flung his arms ,wide to embrace his slave and welcome him ,with kisses of a brother to his breast2 ,and they twain wept together happy tears ,of equal love and heavenly gratitude1 ,and fell upon their knees before the ,lord ,and poured out all their soul in fervent prayer ,for ,paul through whom their blessing came to them4 ,soon after1 from ,philemon charged with gifts ,to ,paul and many messages of love1 ,onesimus went joyful back to ,rome ,to serve his master there by serving ,paul4 ,he faithfully rehearsed to ,syrus all ,that at ,coloss chanced to him1 and said3 ,paul never told me that he knew my lord1 ,that therefore ,i might trust him all in all4 ,he must have wished to put me so to proof ,what naked peril ,i would dare for ,christ4 ,i tremble when ,i think3 ',if ,i had failed ,in faith and in obedience to ,paul's word6 ,had ,i not made the venture to go back6 ,what had ,i lost on earth1 perhaps in heaven6' ,but ,i am glad the venture was so sheer1 ,since ,i at last went back in spite of doubt4 ,but1 know1 my heart beat thick against my ribs1 ,when ,i was on the brink to meet him first1 ,my master--for in truth ,i had wrought him wrong4 ,but1 ,syrus1 what thinkest thou my master did8 ,thou hast never1 ,i suppose1 beheld a slave ,wept over by his master as in love1 ,and like an equal drawn unto his breast ,and kissed4 ,but so my master did to me4 ,for he too was disciple1 like myself1 ,and ,paul erst won him to discipleship2 ,and thus we twain were brethren in the ,lord4 ,and he was tried and found not wanting too6 ,and here am ,i in ,rome1 no runaway1 ,but hither by ,philemon's wishes sped ,to be a happy minister to ,paul4 ,when ,syrus heard such things1 the skeptic heart ,that had resisted all ,paul's eloquence ,was overcome at last through works to faith4 ,,book ,,xxii4 ,,drusilla ,,and ,,nero4 ,while ,paul in chains is writing to ,christian churches letters characterized at once by the sublimest reaches of spiritual vision and by the most painstaking condescension to details of practical precept1 ,simon the sorcerer1 with ,felix and ,drusilla1 plots the apostle's death4 ,simon proceeds by indirection1 having it in mind to bring about the death of ,felix also4 ,this he accomplishes1 with the collusion and complicity of ,drusilla4 ,but first1 at ,drusilla's instance1 he procures for her in company with her husband an audience with ,nero1 of which ,poppa1 the emperor's favorite1 is secretly an observer4 ,poppa notices the impression made on her sovereign by ,drusilla1 and she is openly present at a subsequent hearing granted by ,nero to the beautiful ,jewess1 during which the latter accuses ,paul1 together with other crimes1 of instigating the murder by poison of ,felix4 ,nero throughout displays1 with much license1 his reckless and frivolous character4 ,,drusilla ,,and ,,nero4 ,that ,phrygian slave did not companionless ,his way ,coloss-ward pursue2 he went ,by ,tychicus accompanied1 who bore ,another letter written from the lips ,of ,paul to the ,colossian church at large4 ,this gloried and exulted in sublime ,prophetic visions of far future things-- ,things future far and other quite than these4 ,paul's hand was manacled1 but not his soul2 ,that1 given the freedom of the universe1 ,ranged as at will on wing omnipotent ,through all the heights and depths of space and time1 ,and saw unutterable things1 which he ,seeking to lade upon expression made ,the very pillars of expression bend ,and sway and totter1 like to sink1 beneath ,the burden insupportable they bore4 ,great soul and free1 free in a body bound1 ,so soaring those empyreal altitudes ,winged with his native vigor but upborne ,on a strong-breasted gale of power divine ,inspiring and enabling him1 who took ,undazzled1 like an eagle in full gaze ,upon the sun1 insufferably bright ,glimpses of heavenly glory1 he yet deigned-- ,nay1 he ascended but to condescend ,the mightier by his lofty lowliness1 ,from exaltation such beheld come down6-- ,deigned to the level of the mean degree ,of men that needed to be counselled thus3 ,lie not one to another1 seeing ye ,have put off the old man that late ye were1 ,him with his deeds1 and the new man put on1 ,the man made new through knowledge to become ,once more the image1 long so far defaced1 ,of that ,god who at first created him4 ,put ye on1 therefore1 as elect of ,god ,to be ,his holy and belovd1 all ,sweet meltingness of heart1 kindness and love1 ,a lowly mind most meek1 long-suffering1 ,forbearing one another1 and should ever1 ,but that be far6 some man among you have ,complaint or quarrel against any1 then1 ,as ,christ forgave you once1 forgive so ye2 ,and over all these vestments of the soul1 ,completing them and binding them secure1 ,put ye on love1 girdle of perfectness4 ,and let the peace of ,christ rule in your hearts4 ,ye wives1 to your own husbands subject be1 ,so yielding as befits you in the ,lord4 ,ye husbands1 love your wives and nourish not ,against them any bitterness of heart4 ,children1 obey your parents in all things1 ,for this well-pleasing is unto the ,lord4 ,fathers1 good heed give ye not to provoke ,your children unto wrath1 lest they lose heart4 ,servants1 your masters in the flesh obey1 ,not with eye-service as men-pleasers1 this1 ,but single-heartedly as fearing ,god4 ,and whatsoever be the thing ye do1 ,heartily do it1 as if doing all ,for the ,lord ,christ in heaven and not for men2 ,knowing that of the ,lord ye shall receive ,guerdon of that inheritance reserved ,for your true bond of service is to ,christ4 ,but he that doeth wrong shall for that wrong ,due recompense receive2 and with the ,lord ,is no respect of person or degree4 ,ye masters1 to your servants what is just ,and equal render2 for a ,master ye1 ,ye also1 have who watcheth from the heaven4 ,while ,paul with tongue or pen such things discoursed1 ,things heavenly and things earthly intermixed 7,yet so as earthly things to raise to heaven1 ,like the sea lifted skyward by the moon71 ,simon the sorcerer1 with the guilty pair1 ,his master and his mistress1 otherwise ,was busy1 plotting the apostle's death4 ,plot within plot there was2 the sorcerer sought ,the death of ,felix too1 for hate of him4 ,to compass this1 he fed ,drusilla's mind ,with bitter poison and with poison sweet2 ,the bitter1 of innuendo to inflame ,her jealous rancor more against her spouse2 ,the sweet1 of flattery ever interfused ,in casual hint dropped1 whisper by the way1 ,no recognition sought1 still less reply1 ,rebuke1 repudiation1 tempted not1 ,but inly working to inebriate ,her pride of beauty and her sense of power1 ,till she should dare whatever need be dared ,of danger or of crime to clear her way ,to empire hoped over the emperor4 ,at length the double venom took effect ,such on ,drusilla's fierce aspiring mind1 ,that ,simon ventured on these words to her3 ,ill sleeper is thine husband1 ,o my liege6 ,i overhear him oft in troubled dream ,belching forth broken voices of unrest4 ,he sleeps like tna or ,vesuvius1 ,say like ,enceladus with tna piled-- ,thou knowest their fable of that giant old4 ,i hope he never will by evil chance ,work his wife harm unmeant in his nightmares6 ,such weight1 such strength1 are monstrous in such throes6 ,drusilla was as deep as ,simon2 she ,well enough guessed whither he tended so4 ,she made her face an utter vacancy1 ,and listened all as if she listened not1 ,while ,simon1 who was satisfied1 went on ,with his approaches neither shunned nor met3 ,at least1 madam1 thine own rest needs must be ,disturbed3 it would be easy to compose ,thine husband to a sounder sleep4 ,he paused1 ,and she made answer quite as from the point1 ,but ,simon did not miss the relevance3 ,simon1 my lord is still postponed at court1 ,has had no hearing of the emperor3 ,reason enough that he should restless be4 ,procure he have his audience soon1 and then-- ,simon1 what thinkest thou8 ,would it not be well ,that ,i attend him when he pleads his cause8 ,thou knowest ,i have some gift of eloquence1 ,the woman's1 and thy master is but man1 ,and somewhat slow of speech--if thick of wit ,too1 that becomes me not to say to thee4 ,i feel that ,i might help our common cause ,by being in presence with the emperor ,myself1 as loyal sponsor for my spouse4 ,excellent1 ,simon said2 and no doubt ,i1 ,permitted to make proffer such as this ,from queen ,drusilla1 shall with ease contrive ,an early audience with his majesty4 ,the conscious twain each other understood1 ,but neither token gave with lip or eye4 ,simon bethought him of the beautiful ,wanton1 ,poppa1 with the emperor ,precariously omnipotent by her charm4 ,to her1 in manner suiting such as he1 ,he wormed at length his way and fawning said3 ,i have some little skill in certain arts ,called by the people magic1 and ,i fain ,thus offer thee my services4 ,i thought ,i might amuse a tedious idle hour ,for his imperial majesty and so ,perhaps1 ,i know not how1 but thou shouldst choose1 ,serve thee1 the wonder of the woman world4 ,nay1 this presumes amiss2 ,i crave thy grace1 ,forgive me1 thou who art already queen ,and empress of the earth1 and canst not need ,service from any4 ,i am all confused ,before thee1 like one dazzled by the sun4 ,it is my foolish vanity1 ,i feel1 ,nothing but that2 but here am ,i in ,rome1 ,and it would be the triumph of my life-- ,just a ,judan magian as ,i am-- ,to have seen the emperor1 and diverted him ,with a few rather pretty tricks ,i know4 ,i on occasion have even awed a mind ,open to superstition 7as most minds ,are sometimes1 aye1 the wisest among men1 ,let witness the great ,julius7 with my art4 ,if ever the fair sovereign of his breast ,should in aught wish him more amenable1 ,thou mayst trust me1 and ,i should not despair ,to move his mind as thou mightst signify4 ,not quite at venture ,simon drew his bow ,thus1 for from common fame he knew how keen ,that very moment was ,poppa's wish1 ,as yet denied to her imperious suit1 ,to supersede ,octavia in her right ,and be the consort of the emperor4 ,the wily sorcerer warped his sinuous way3 ,here ,i have seemed to sue thee for myself2 ,but1 sooth to say1 ,i plead another's cause4 ,wilt thou not see ,drusilla8 ,jewess1 who1 ,declined from royal fortune and degree1 ,now seeks a hearing from the emperor ,for her lord ,felix1 late in ,palestine ,a ruler1 but unhappily since fallen ,under some cloud of doubt at ,rome4 ,beseech ,thee1 give my liege ,drusilla speech with thee4 ,she too is fair1 if not as thou1 yet fair4 ,she fain1 ,i think1 would meet the emperor ,in person1 that her tears might touch his heart4 ,subtle insinuation was conveyed ,by ,simon saying this1 which the quick sense ,of the imperial favorite caught2 she said3 ,it does not need thy lady fair should first ,wait upon me2 without that1 she shall have ,her wished access and opportunity4 ,when her lord ,felix presently is called ,to hearing1 let ,drusilla with him come4 ,her privilege she will find before prepared2 ,so much ,i freely undertake for her4 ,poppa had her reasons and her scheme2 ,and1 as for ,simon1 he said to himself3 ,whichever woman prosper1 ,i am sped4 ,drusilla girded up both mind and will ,to meet her one imperial chance aright4 ,felix went like a culprit2 like a queen ,went she1 her peerless beauty wielded all ,with absolute command infallible-- ,like a bright weapon edged and tempered true ,seen wielded in the perfect swordsman's hand4 ,slack heed the youthful emperor paid him ,still struggling to support his truculence2 ,his gaze fixed undisguisedly on her4 ,poppa from behind a screen set nigh ,saw and heard all2 not unsuspected quite ,of the alert ,drusilla wise as she ,in arts of ambush for waylaying words ,or looks meant to be private3 ,nero knew ,poppa was there4 ,drusilla triumphing ,joyed in her heart to have her rival see ,how easy usurpation was when one ,appeared whose very birthright was to reign3 ,nero was willing those eavesdropping ears ,and eyes should witness what would madden them2 ,he took a wanton mischievous delight ,in teasing that fierce heart to jealousy4 ,this1 too much drunken with her glorying1 ,drusilla did not guess1 and overweened ,in measure of the conquest she had won4 ,the emperor made the hearing short2 dismissed ,felix dismayed and from his truculence ,completely broken--to his servile state ,remanded1 as in spirit so in mien4 ,yet did not ,nero so his cause conclude3 ,he said frankly to ,felix3 ,go1 my lord1 ,thy way2 ,i shall not need to see thee more4 ,let thou this lady at next summons come ,without thee2 she shall better plead thy cause4 ,sentence of death the emperor had pronounced1 ,not meaning it1 upon that wretched man4 ,felix resumed his truculence1 alone ,returning with ,drusilla2 he had felt-- ,insensate as he was1 could not but feel-- ,her separation of herself from him ,in the imperial presence1 and he now ,fiercely upbraided her4 ,but she was soft ,replying2 with indignant tenderness ,purged herself clear of all but loving guile ,practiced reluctantly in his behoof-- ,his1 sole1 her husband1 father to her son6-- ,to serve him with the amorous emperor4 ,felix could not resist the witching wiles ,of fondness and of faithfulness she plied1 ,and he became a plaything in her hands ,trusting alike her loyalty and wit4 ,she presently told ,simon3 ,full come now ,the time is that thy master should enjoy ,sleep undisturbed with dreams4 ,compound for me ,the quieting potion that thou toldst me of4 ,see that thou make it strong enough2 thy lord ,is not a puny weakling to be soothed ,with what might still a crying babe2 and ,i-- ,nay1 thou1 thou thyself1 ,simon1 shalt commend ,his opiate to his lips4 ,the sorcerer shrugged ,his shoulders and demurred3 ,o liege1 nor thou1 ,nor ,i1 with our own hands1 should to his lips ,present the potion4 ,let a trusted slave ,bear it unto his master's bath to-night1 ,and say3 ',his queen unto lord ,felix sends ,health and the promise of more quiet sleep4' ,the draught is drastic--for a lullaby-- ,indeed disturbing in its first effect2 ,but safe sleep it will bring whoever drinks4 ,thy sedative will not pain my lord too much8 ,drusilla made her tone expressionless ,in asking2 and in like wise ,simon said3 ,not too much1 lady--let me be the judge1 ,or thee who lovest him equally with me4 ,drusilla summoned ,syrus1 and said to him3 ,thou lovest thy master and thy mistress well-- ,better1 ,i think1 of late than once thou didst4 ,my master and my mistress both ,i love ,so as1 ,i trust1 to serve them faithfully1 ,the slave1 a little hard bestead1 replied4 ,aye1 ,i have noted thy true love for us2 ,be sure1 lad1 thou shalt nothing lose thereby1 ,drusilla wheedlingly resumed2 whereat ,syrus could not refrain himself from saying ,in so much spurning of the sense implied3 ,yea1 noble lady1 none can ever lose ,aught by obeying ,christ the ,lord in heaven4 ,what meanest thou1 boy8 ,drusilla sharply said4 ,lord other than lord ,felix hast thou then8 ,syrus was sorry he had gone so far2 ,yet loyalty to ,jesus and to ,paul ,wrought in him1 and1 supported as it was ,with instinct of unquenchable revolt ,from ,felix and ,drusilla both alike1 ,buoyed him and kept him firm in that assay4 ,yea1 madam1 he replied1 ,i have a lord1 ,christ ,jesus1 crucified once1 but alive ,now and ascended far above all height ,by the right hand of ,god in heaven set down4 ',that is of ,paul1 that surely is of ,paul6' ,drusilla reasoned2 then1 with threatening brow1 ,to ,syrus3 ,whence these things to thee8 ,the truth-- ,thou hast heard ,paul1 and learned such lies from him8 ,i have heard ,paul1 yea1 madam1 and have learned ,from him such truth as makes me true to thee ,beyond what ever ,i had been before4 ,aye1 aye1 no doubt1 ,drusilla1 musing1 sneered4 ,a light broke in upon her mind2 she said3 ,that precious runaway1 ,onesimus1 ,he1 ,i suppose1 heard ,paul1 and got himself ,puffed up with these same notions of a lord ,in heaven1 which set him feeling free of us4 ,tell me1 what knowest thou of ,onesimus8 ,did he hear ,paul8 ,where is he now8 ,tell me1 ,thou rogue1 for verily ,i believe thou knowest4 ,shrewd as he was1 ,syrus conceived a hope1 ,a sudden simple hope that if the truth1 ,the beautiful mere truth1 were told her now1 ,drusilla1 yea1 ,drusilla even1 would feel ,its power4 ,so he rehearsed the history1 ,how that ,onesimus1 induced by ,paul1 ,had gone back to his master at ,coloss2 ,how that his master1 for the love of ,paul ,who had erst won him to the love of ,jesus1 ,had bidden ,onesimus return to ,rome ,there in his stead to minister to ,paul2 ,how that ,onesimus had gladly come1 ,and was that moment gratefully with ,paul4 ,drusilla listened1 but she gave no sign2 ,she had in truth been listening absently1 ,absorbedly considering what fresh proof ,to purpose against ,paul perhaps was here4 ,she said to ,syrus3 ,aye1 a pretty tale ,to entertain thy mistress' ear withal6 ,why never can you people tell the truth8 ,you always seem to think you must contrive ,some falsehood1 though the truth would better serve4 ,well1 well1 it is your way4 ,but now1 my lad1 ,be ready1 when thy master to his bath ,shall presently repair1 bring me prompt word4 ,an errand ,i shall have for thee to him ,that as thou lovest him thou wilt love to do4 ,syrus1 as bidden duly coming1 heard3 ,take this1 my lad1 let not a drop be spilled1 ,and bearing it to thy master say to him1 ',thy lady sends a sleeping-draught to thee1 ,and with it wishes health and placid sleep4' ,syrus1 deep scrupling1 ',fair is this1 or foul8' ,yet found no way not to fulfill the word4 ,felix said3 ,this is strange4 ,what sayest thou1 boy8 ,thy mistress sends me this8 ,thou liest1 thou wretch6 ,this is thine own work2 thou wouldst do me dead2 ,drink it thyself1 thou varlet1 and go sleep4 ,thou wilt not8 ,nay1 but yea thou wilt1 thou shalt2 ,now1 let me see thee drink it every drop4 ,and with his trembling hand the debauchee ,gave ,syrus back the chalice4 ,let me call ,my mistress2 thou shalt hear from her own lips ,whether she did not send this draught to thee1 ,charging me not to waste one precious drop4 ,i know ,i should offend by drinking it4 ,but thou mightst take it somewhat heedfully1 ,trying it drop by drop at first to prove ,its virtue and its fitness to thy case4 ,so ,syrus pleaded2 and his master said3 ,that is not spoken like a poisoner4 ,but so thou darest1 rascal1 cast a doubt ,on what thy mistress sends in love to me8 ,thou shalt pay dear for that2 for ,i shall tell ,her thou presumedst to advise to me ,a care1 forsooth1 how ,i partook her cheer4 ,here1 give it me1 and ,i will toss it off-- ,one swallow--there6--and lay me down to sleep4 ,drusilla1 soon thereafter called again ,to audience with the emperor1 high in hope ,went radiant with her beauty2 but was vexed ,to find ,poppa seated by his side ,as if assessor of his judgment-throne4 ,she sat resplendent in her robes of state1 ,as queenly in her person and her port2 ,yet of a soft delicious loveliness ,that took ,drusilla captive by its charm4 ,aspiring as she did to rival her ,drusilla thought involuntary thoughts ,of admiration mixed with jealousy3 ',no wonder that she sits there throned by him1 ,imperial lovely creature that she is6 ,that bloom of youth and beauty on her cheek6 ,the tempting undulation of repose ,suggested underneath the graceful folds ,of vesture that flow down the supple limbs ,and softening into curves of lusciousness ,the statuesque perfection of her form6 ,but pampered with what pains of luxury6 ,they say five hundred asses follow her ,wherever she makes progresses abroad ,and spend their milk to brim a bath for her1 ,that her sweet flesh and delicate lose not ,that melting softness and that lucency6' ',the wanton6'--so she virtuously thought4 ,poppa was all graciousness2 she bade ,drusilla trust her friendship utterly4 ,she had had herself her sorrow2 whereat tears ,orbed large her lucid eyes and fairer made4 ,she quoted ,dido out of ,virgil1 saying1 ',myself not inexperienced in distress1 ,i learn to succor who are miserable4' ,my ,otho--but that wound is yet too fresh6 ,why had lord ,felix died so suddenly8 ,he had no need to die so--if he took ,his own life rashly in despair2 his cause ,was far from lost--in fact1 was safe enough-- ,his brother ,pallas1 ,nero interposed1 ,had seen to that2 but there were reasons of state ,why his acquittal should not yet transpire4 ,indeed ,i comforted my spouse with hope ,all that ,i could1 ,drusilla wiped a tear ,responding1 and it was not suicide1 ,i think now1 but a prompted murder base4 ,murder is rampant everywhere in ,rome1 ,the ,rhadamanthine ,nero sadly said2 ,but we think little of it till it stalks ,into the sacred circle of our own ,and strikes down husband1 mother1 ruthlessly6 ,poppa and the emperor joined hands ,in tacit token of sweet sympathy4 ',such acting6 ,can ,i hope to equal it8' ,drusilla1 not a little dashed in spirit1 ,said to herself2 'yet let me not despair4' ,madam1 thy husband's death must be avenged1 ,so ,nero1 with imperial complaisance ,but in a manner to dismiss the theme4 ,accepting the dismissal meant1 and yet ,attaching to her dutiful reply ,a hint to tempt him on1 ,drusilla said3 ,i thank thy majesty for saying that2 ,and the same stroke will many crimes avenge4 ,had she achieved her wish8 ,she could not guess4 ,nero1 as if with shift of aim1 inquired3 ,thou art late arrived in ,rome from ,palestine2 ,what dost thou chance to know of this man ,paul1 ,prisoner here1 like thyself ,jew in blood8 ,i thank thee too that thou hast asked me that1 ,drusilla with judicial candor said2 ,aye1 ,paul is of one kindred with myself1 ,i blush to say it2 he is a renegade1 ,offscouring1 outcast of his countrymen4 ,i pray thee judge thou not our race from him4 ,but our sage ,seneca1 my schoolmaster1 ,smiled ,nero with imperial pleasantry1 ,speaks otherwise of ,paul4 ,i bade him go ,visit the ,jew philosopher in chains ,and sound him of the depth of wisdom his4 ,he brought me back a wonderful report2 ',a little transcendental1' so he said1 ',too much of ,oriental mysticism1 ,but sane at bottom1 and a man of worth4' ,tell us about ,paul4 ,i should be much pleased ,to put to blush my old oracular ,smug ,seneca with proof that he for once ,at least mistook2 a fine old gentleman ,is ,seneca1 but too infallible2 ,in fact1 intolerably infallible4 ,i cannot stand infallibility-- ,except my own and thine of course1 my dear ,poppa6 ,when they come to deify ,us1 we shall have to be infallible4 ,that is1 supposably3 ,i will inquire ,of ,seneca2 he is my arbiter1 ,know1 madam1 in these minor points1 as is ,my superfine good friend ,petronius ,in those more serious points of etiquette4 ,drusilla masked amazement1 listening keen ,while this young portent of an emperor ,let play his humor of hilarity4 ,eccentric and incalculable curves ,of orbit1 pure caprices of career1 ,might seem to be the movement of his speech2 ,but always1 from whatever apogee1 ,it failed not its return to bitterness3 ,the playful tiger gnashed his ravin fangs4 ,still turning toward ,drusilla1 he went on3 ,behooves1 lady1 thine emperor of the world ,should be well schooled in all things2 ,i abound ,in tutors at my elbows to nudge me2 ,old ,burrus there1 ,i have not mentioned him-- ,no disrespect intended--what thinkest thou8 ,schoolmasters and schoolmistresses and all1 ,is there not risk they overstep the bound8 ,so few know where1 just where1 the limit is4 ,my own dear mother--to her ashes peace6-- ,sacred as was her right1 if she had lived ,might yet have come to manage overmuch4 ,poppa even1 in her victorious calm ,of conscious power beside him1 winced at this ,as at slant notice served upon herself2 ,and poor ,drusilla hugged a shudder down4 ,but ,nero rattled on licentiously3 ,what was ,i saying8 ,aye1 'infallible'-- ,and toward ,poppa now his eye he turned-- ,we two shall have to be infallible-- ,i take it so--when they make gods of us4 ,what a bore that1 to be infallible6 ,bore to be anything because one must6 ,let us take it as a joke and not be bored-- ,uproarious joke1 my dear1 for me and thee ,to pose as gods1 while we hold both our sides ,lest we split laughing and upset mankind6 ,but for the present here is help arrived1 ,welcome1 while we stay only mortals yet1 ,to make that old prig of a ,seneca ,come down once from his magisterial throne4 ,wherewith he to ,drusilla spoke once more3 ,madam1 we listen1 tell us about ,paul4 ,besides that menace slanted in his words1 ,the gamesome emperor hurt ,drusilla sore ,demonstrating before her thus a firm ,accord and understanding knit between ,himself and this ,poppa2 worse to bear1 ,poppa's easy air of affable-- ,a condescension equal to his own ,toward her1 ,drusilla1 air as of a queen ,deigning her scepter toward a suppliant6 ,drusilla would have felt it like a touch ,of tonic to her blood1 could she have found ,one least hint that ,poppa in her heart ,hated her3 but ,poppa far too well ,was mistress of her part2 she sweetly smiled ,exquisite discomposure on her foe4 ,with sheer exertion of her will1 or helped ,only with the delight to injure ,paul-- ,daunted1 yet with a front of dauntlessness-- ,drusilla entered on her perjury4 ,by the reaction of her eloquence ,upon herself reflected from the fixed ,admiring heed she won1 she plucked up heart ,of buoyance to be brilliant more and more ,as she went on and told the emperor1 ,him chiefly1 and at length not her at all1 ,how ,paul was a disturber everywhere2 ,he at ,jerusalem had raised a mob ,and tumult of his outraged countrymen ,against himself2 they1 out of loyalty1 ,would then and there have rent him limb from limb1 ,but that the chiliarch intervened to save ,the wretch from violence--not of the law1 ,though well deserved--and under escort thence ,sent him to her lord ,felix1 governor ,at ,csarea1 to be held and judged4 ,felix1 who was the heart of lenity1 ,not bearing to condemn him for his crimes1 ,postponed his trial1 until ,festus came ,successor to her husband dispossessed ,of kingdom for his too much clemency-- ,fault1 yet a noble fault1 and ,csar-like 7',my ,otho6' thy word1 madam2 'my ,felix6' mine7-- ,then ,festus on the point to sentence him ,was thwarted by the culprit's hardihood2 ,desperate hardihood seeking reprieve ,at least from doom by refuge in appeal ,to ,csar4 ,aye1 a ,roman citizen ,paul has devised some scheme of fraud to be-- ,gross profanation of a sacred right ,perverted to asylum thus from crime6 ,paul is a master mind--no need to swear ,falsely that he is not2 wise ,seneca ,was not so much to blame for being deceived ,in him1 so upright-seeming1 plausible4 ,their best man1 sagest1 subtlest of them all1 ,the ,jewish councillors picked out to send ,hither with ,paul to make his sentence sure4 ,alas1 the culprit was too deep for him4 ,one night on shipboard in the voyage hither ,he sought to bribe the soldier guarding him ,to make away with this ,jew ,shimei ,by tossing him in darkness overboard4 ,that plot did not succeed2 but ,paul contrived ,to hoodwink the centurion and make him ,believe the scheme to murder was not his1 ,paul's1 against ,shimei1 but ,shimei's against ,paul6 ,so ,shimei was thrown into chains1 while ,paul ,stalked the deck free1 though for form's sake still watched4 ,this lasted1 till the very gods in heaven ,had pity on poor ,shimei and with stroke ,of lightning set him free from men by death4 ,so1 is a stroke of lightning pity then1 ,sometimes1 said ,nero1 with the gods in heaven8 ,a piquant way to pity6 ,we1 my dear-- ,the emperor with a frolic feline look ,that made ,poppa shiver turned to her-- ,when we are gods on earth1 may imitate ,those our facetious cousins in the skies ,with many a stroke of lightning launched in pity6 ,an almost boyish blithesomeness lit up ,the handsome face of ,nero saying this2 ,had it not been for frightful lightning strokes ,too frequent sent in deadly earnest down ,from that ,olympus of imperial power1 ,all might have seemed but pranksome playfulness4 ,drusilla--with profound obeisance bowed-- ,after due deferent pause if it should please ,his majesty to be facetious farther1 ,her weaving at her loom of lies resumed3 ,thou wouldst in vain1 ,o emperor1 inquire ,of that centurion ,julius for the truth2 ,he himself fell a helpless prey to ,paul4 ,why1 on the wretched island where our ship ,was stranded1 lost1 and where all winter we ,were cooped up waiting for reluctant spring1 ,day after day did that oblivious man ,attend upon his prisoner and a crew1 ,that prisoner's dupes about him clustering ever1 ,to hear long tales which seemed to cast a spell ,on whoso heard them and bewitch his sense4 ,i grieve to say a ,roman knight was found ,there1 ,sergius ,paulus1 to lend countenance-- ,a name proconsular so much defiled6 ,yea1 and the ,roman governor of the isle1 ,publius1 fell openly into ,paul's snare4 ,no very serious matter it might seem1 ,so far1 but hearken what a sequel came4 ,a worthy member of our court abroad1 ,who loyally our fortune followed still1 ,and follows--,o ,sire1 in this degenerate age1 ,happy if ancient loyalty survives6-- ,simon1 a man of merit and device1 ,saw when1 one morning on an open hill ,withdrawn1 ,paul made a demonstration dire ,before all these assembled to behold ,whom ,i have named1 what he could do1 and would1 ,with practice of his wicked magic arts4 ,he smote a woman of his company ,who had offended him dead at a stroke ,of incantation that his lips let fall4 ,simon will tell thee1 that thou hear first-hand4 ,but to crown all--and here ,drusilla's voice ,faltered1 and her eyes1 eloquent before ,with fine indignant passion1 now with tears ,dimmed1 pathos tenfold eloquent took on-- ,aye1 to crown all1 no doubt my ,felix fell ,a victim to his ingrate wickedness4 ,our slave-boy ,syrus bore his lord a drink ,pretended as of virtue to bring sleep-- ,which my poor ,felix long had needed sore6-- ,it brought sleep1 but the sleep it brought was death4 ,alas1 my ,felix6 ,and1 last infamy1 ,that slave lad had been primed by ,paul to lay ,her consort's murder at his spouse's door6 ,the frontless varlet had the face to tell ,his mistress to her very teeth that she ,had herself sent that sleeping-draught by him ,to ,felix as he took his evening bath4 ,it was ,paul's sorcery made the boy believe1 ,against his own right senses1 what was false4 ,i should have told thee how in lesser sort1 ,that is1 in matter of estate--light thing ,indeed in contrast of such harm to life-- ,we had before this suffered from ,paul's hands2 ,for he beguiled away a slave of ours-- ,by name ,onesimus1 a ,phrygian lad-- ,through whom perverted first himself from faith ,this other servant ,syrus was seduced4 ,no end to that wretch ,paul's devices evil6 ,let him go free1 nay1 let him only live1 ,though in a prison1 the emperor has a foe ,cannot indeed unfix him from his throne-- ,where he sits firm as on ,olympus ,jove 7,if thus a faithful ,jew may fit her speech7-- ,but will the quick seeds of sedition sow ,to fill the empire with their harvest wild4 ,paul teaches all men of another king ,than ,csar whose sole right it is to reign4 ,while thus ,drusilla at the emperor's ear ,artfully wove false witness against ,paul1 ,paul in his chains was beating out his heart ,in throbbing letters of such strain as this3 ,if any consolation1 then1 in ,christ ,there be1 if any comfort sweet of love1 ,if in the ,spirit any fellowship1 ,if any moving of compassion even1 ,make my joy full1 belovd1 that ye be ,like-minded each with other1 the same love ,within you all1 one spirit1 one accord2 ,far be contention1 and vainglory far1 ,but all in lowly-mindedness esteem ,each one his fellow better than himself4 ,look not each man toward his own things alone1 ,but each man also toward the other's look4 ,this mind be in you which in ,jesus was3 ,he1 in ,his right1 was of the form of ,god1 ,yet thought not his equality with ,god ,a thing to be held fast to as ,his spoil2 ,but freely made himself of no repute1 ,taking upon ,him the bond-servant's form ,and entering the similitude of men4 ,nor yet was this enough2 ,he1 being found ,in fashion as a man1 humbled ,himself ,still farther and became obedient1 ,to the degree of dying--not a death ,such as befalls the common lot of men1 ,but that most dreadful death upon the cross ,this is the reason why the righteous ,god ,exalted ,him so highly and the name ,gave ,him that over every name prevails1 ,that in the name of ,jesus every knee ,should bow1 of beings in heaven1 of beings on earth1 ,of beings under earth1 and every tongue ,confess that ,jesus ,christ is ,lord of all ,unto the glory of the ,father ,god4 ,so1 my belovd1 as ye have obeyed ,me ever1 not as in my presence only ,but in my absence now much more1 work out ,your own salvation with much wholesome fear1 ,awed in the thought that ,god ,himself it is ,that in you works alike to will and work ,as seemeth in ,his holy pleasure good4 ,no murmurings and no questionings allow1 ,that ye may blameless be and void of guile1 ,children of ,god1 open to no rebuke1 ,among a crooked people and perverse1 ,full in the midst of whom ye shine as lights ,set in the darkness of a world of sin2 ,steadfastly holding forth the word of life1 ,that in the day of ,christ ,i may rejoice ,as having not in vain run this my race1 ,and not in vain accomplished all my toil4 ,but1 let it even be mine to be poured out1 ,as on an altar set for sacrifice1 ,a victim for the service of your faith1 ,know ,i rejoice and with you all rejoice2 ,and for the selfsame cause rejoice all ye1 ,yea1 and in fellowship with me rejoice4' ,from prison this1 in face of martyrdom6 ,whatever fell1 ,paul's victory was secure4 ,such love1 such faith1 such hope1 such power in ,christ ,of joy1 such hold on heaven1 was to defeat ,present or future1 harm or threat of harm-- ,from earth1 from hell1 aimed--inaccessible1 ,safe as a star smiling above a storm4 ,so then ,paul wrote1 and such himself he was1 ,while those vain wicked wished to work him ill4 ,though the twain listened with all courteous heed ,to what ,drusilla told and acted then1 ,nor ,nero nor ,poppa was deceived2 ,but both admired1 and this ,drusilla felt4 ,having retrieved thus in some part her loss1 ,she heard demurely while the emperor said3 ,thou understandest1 madam1 this is not ,a formal sitting of our court august4 ,i oft advise myself beforehand thus-- ,though seldom1 lady1 so agreeably-- ,what the real merits of an issue are4 ,i have much enjoyed thy story--and thyself-- ,and ,i shall hope to see thee yet again4 ,meantime1 ,i pray thee1 send thy ,simon to me2 ,i might find use for such a man as he4 ,poppa1 to play out her part of queen1 ,added a gracious word3 ,and come thyself ,to see me--by the emperor's leave assumed-- ,and teach me to be ,jewess1 such as thou4 ,it must be lovely beyond anything ,to hate so and abide so beautiful6 ,she had mixed a cunning bitter with her sweet2 ,perhaps her ,nero so would be forewarned6 ,,book ,,xxiii4 ,,nero ,,and ,,simon4 ,simon1 sent by ,drusilla to the emperor1 finds it impossible to reach the imperial presence without help from ,poppa1 who grants him her favor only on condition that he will serve her wish at need4 ,the crafty sorcerer buys his way with the necessary promises4 ,nero flouts ,simon with disdainful irony and sarcasm1 which excites the sorcerer's resentment4 ,this feeling he dissembles1 while he counsels the unfaithful imperial husband how to rid himself of his young empress ,octavia--the sorcerer being all the time in doubt whether it is with ,drusilla or with ,poppa that the emperor1 who speaks darkly1 would supplant her4 ,nero at length dismisses ,simon1 bidding him tell his mistress the emperor's desire to pay her a secret visit4 ,this message the sorcerer gratifies his own spleen by conveying to ,drusilla in terms the most offensive to her pride4 ,she bursts out in violent anger and spurning2 but ,simon shows his mistress how she may salve in a measure the hurt to her dignity1 and at the same time serve her hatred of ,paul1 by making it a condition of her complaisance that the emperor shall first put the apostle and his companions to death4 ,the sorcerer returns with her reply to ,nero1 who again1 and even more deeply than before1 stirs the ,jew's heart to deadly hatred4 ,simon plots a wild scheme to have his revenge4 ,meantime with change in certain officers of the government the aspect of affairs grows threatening for ,paul and his fellow-,christians4 ,onesimus and ,syrus are arrested and hurried away to suffer on the rack4 ,,nero ,,and ,,simon4 ,drusilla1 eager in uncertain hope ,to meet the pleasure of the emperor1 ,promptly sent ,simon to him as he said4 ,she charged her minion to bend all his craft ,to win his mistress way that she in proof ,upon that youngster emperor of the world ,might1 without let from other present1 try ,if for once only what of power was left ,her1 after such misfortunes suffered late1 ,to steal possession of the hearts of men4 ,consider1 ,simon1 what might not ,i do ,for thee1 once seated in that place of power8 ,she with such words and with a subtle smile ,of deep insinuation cheered him forth4 ,but ,simon1 in an outer anteroom ,of the imperial palace with its guards-- ,many removes from where the emperor was-- ,long hung in waiting day by day in vain4 ,at length ,poppa1 not the emperor1 ,sent gracious word that she would see that ,jew4 ,thou hadst perhaps forgotten who it was1 ,the favorite1 drunken-fond of power nor less ,of demonstration too of power1 began1 ,to dash the sorcerer in his confidence-- ,say1 hadst thou not forgotten who it was ,gave thee for thy ,drusilla her desired ,access to the imperial presence late8 ,simon saw what she wanted1 and was quick ,to humor to the full her proud caprice4 ,he readily commanded to his face ,a trouble of confusion and chagrin1 ,and stammered something inarticulate4 ,the merciless ,poppa pressed her point3 ,was it to me1 or to somebody else1 ,i heard thee offer service of thine art8 ,methinks thou spokest1 or perhaps ,i dreamed1 ,of certain potencies thou couldst exert ,on my behalf--or some one's--if thou wouldst1 ,to make at need a mind amenable ,to reason that might otherwise resist8 ,simon her humor flattered to its height1 ,and artfully grew more and more confused ,before her1 till he judged her satisfied ,that his humiliation was complete4 ,then1 with abject profession of remorse ,and shame that he so far forgot her due ,as to seek audience with the emperor ,in any way other than through herself1 ,he humbly asked her what her wish might be2 ,in short1 renewed the proffer of himself ,to be her faithful servant all in all4 ,but art thou not in prior duty bound ,to that ,drusilla fair of thine8 she asked4 ,yea1 doubtless1 the adroit dissembler said-- ,a protestation of deep loyalty ,to his old mistress1 not to be seduced1 ,commingling strangely in his look and tone ,with offer to be serviceable now4 ,supposing beautiful ,drusilla's aims ,and mine should clash8 ,poppa said4 ,but he3 ,that were calamity indeed--for her2 ,the far more beautiful must needs prevail4 ,she has perhaps her too aspiring hopes2 ,her hopes1 ,i own1 ,i have no heart to dash4 ,let her nurse them2 but be it mine meanwhile ,to watch and strive they do not pierce the breast ,that suckles them in vain4 ,what meanest thou8 ,poppa asked4 ,why1 this1 the sorcerer said1 ,lady ,drusilla's interests and her aims ,may not agree4 ,they do not1 if her aims ,and thine1 ,o empress1 clash4 ,her interests1 ,true interests1 ,i mean1 she best consults ,in being to her sovereign loyal liege4 ,i serve the subject1 when ,i serve the queen4 ',empress1' thou namest me1 ,poppa said4 ,thou knowest ,i am not empress4 ,yea1 ,i know1 ,said ,simon1 empress not in name--as yet4 ,another1 with deep implication said ,poppa1 that imposing title bears4 ,were it not so1 with apt intelligence1 ,made instant answer ,simon1 thou wouldst not ,need modestly disclaim the title--thou ,who worthily possessest now the power4 ,not all the power1 ,poppa sagely said2 ,some real part of the power is in the name4 ,help me to win the name1 and fix thy price4 ,my price would be the pleasure ,i should have ,to see thee sitting1 where thy right ere now ,had placed thee1 on the half throne of the world-- ,so ,simon with devout obeisance said4 ,then added3 ,if the emperor should suspect-- ,but1 pardon1 thou hast asked me nothing yet4 ,i ask thee now1 speak freely out to me ,all that is in thy mind1 ,poppa said4 ,if then1 ,i say1 the emperor should suspect-- ,of course with ground for the suspicion 7that ,well understood1 no innocent to be wronged7-- ,and ,simon grinned intolerably a wry ,involuntary grin of import such1 ,so horribly conveyed1 that almost she1 ,poppa1 shuddered in recoil from him-- ,suspect1 with reason shown1 a full supply1 ,that the young partner of his bed and throne1 ,octavia1 is less worthy of his faith ,than were to-- ,aye1 ,i see1 ,i see1 broke ,poppa1 her instinctive first recoil ,quite overmastered2 it was of the flesh1 ,mere backward creep of muscle and of nerve1 ,repugnance of the inner spirit none4 ,but to supply the reason-- ,shall be mine1 ,said ,simon1 finishing her arrested speech4 ,he undertook at venture in the dark2 ,but to gain time1 and to secure access1 ,his present errand1 to the emperor1 ,he added1 with demure and downcast look3 ,the ground beneath us now is treacherous2 ,i could with greater freedom utter all ,that might be needful in such case as this1 ,to other ear than thine1 ,o empress fair1 ,or any woman's4 ,let me1 pray thee1 see ,the emperor4 ,thou shalt be well satisfied1 ,i pledge me1 with the issue when it comes4 ,so ,simon won him clear for then1 and went-- ,his way made easy by ,poppa's part2 ,yet not as with her privity1 much less ,as with her favor openly displayed-- ,to his wished waiting on the emperor4 ,thou art a go-between1 ,i understand1 ,abruptly and ambiguously said ,the emperor to ,simon4 ,simon winced ,a little1 he so little wont to wince4 ,what did it mean8 ,had ,nero overheard ,through some eavesdropper what had just now passed ,between him and ,poppa8 ,was he vexed8 ,himself at least was inly vexed to hear ,the opprobrious name of 'go-between' applied1 ,where he had hoped for honor as a mage ,and wielder of weird supernatural power4 ,he wavered1 and found nothing to reply4 ,thou art modest1 ,nero said1 with irony2 ,but ,i have heard thy fame1 thou needst not blush1 ,pallas has told me how as go-between ,thou servedst his brother ,felix in the ,east1 ,finding for him a really royal spouse4 ,i hope thy go-between officiousness ,ended with bringing the devoted pair ,together8 ,nothing after had to do ,with the late parting of the same by death8 ,simon was stumbled at such raillery1 ,uneasily uncertain what it meant4 ,he writhed and wriggled on his feet2 but deemed ,the emperor best were pleased to have his will ,of banter1 unreplied to--banter felt ,as far too formidable for right zest1 ,proceeding from a prince1 and such a prince6 ,wilt ply again thy skill of go-between1 ,and faithfully1 for me8 the emperor said4 ,a question fairly asked1 which must be met3 ,could it concern--,poppa8 ,in such case1 ,the office of the 'go-between'--as pleased ,this jocular young ruler of mankind ,to name him ignominiously--might take ,a dignity almost imperial on2 ,simon would frame reply comportably3 ,if the august will of his majesty1 ,the emperor of the world1 should condescend ,to make one most unworthy of the grace ,in any wise elect ambassador ,to serve the imperial pleasure at what court ,soever of such beauty as were fit ,to be assumed for partner of his throne-- ,why1 ,simon could but pledge his loyalty1 ,and trust his wonted fortune might not fail4 ,thou takest thy pander's part full seriously1 ,the emperor1 bantering still1 but curious1 said3 ,perhaps our grave ambassador of love ,might1 from his pregnant wit1 even nominate ,the court of beauty where befitting were ,the majesty of empire should pay suit4 ,the ,roman state impersonate in me ,gives ear4 ,played with in such ambiguous wise ,simon was much perplexed to choose his way4 ,he flung himself on rumor1 and replied3 ,the ,roman state1 embodied in thyself ,most worthily1 most worthily has made ,its choice already2 mine to serve that choice4 ,thou art an oracle2 who knows so much1 ,should needs know more1 the emperor teasing said4 ,advise me1 thou who knowest so easily ,what my choice is1 how ,i may win my choice4 ,consider that the emperor of the world ,is after all the veriest slave in ,rome2 ,the rascal people lord it over him4 ,i have no trouble with the senators1 ,they follow like whipped spaniels at my heels-- ,the reverend 'conscript fathers1' to be sure6 ,but the great ,roman people is a spell ,i am afraid of2 ,i must please the mob1 ,who will not let me marry as ,i would2 ,the many-headed monster mob of ,rome4 ,the emperor gave his peevish humor vent1 ,contemptuously regardless of who heard4 ,but ,simon was alert and caught his cue4 ,the tyrant mob may easily be fooled1 ,he said with politic suggestion deep2 ,fooled rightly1 they will clamor1 not against1 ,but for1 the emperor's wish4 ,open thy thought1 ,said ,nero2 be an oracle indeed-- ,for wisdom2 for equivocation1 not4 ,what the imperial wish is1 ,simon said1 ,it were impiety in me to guess4 ,but grant it were a prince's natural wish ,to change a barren or a faithless spouse ,for one more suited to his princely mind1 ,ways might be found to make his realm agree4 ,suppose the case1 then2 how wouldst thou proceed8 ,so1 as if only idly1 ,nero asked4 ,let me suppose a case of faithlessness1 ,simon1 with study of the emperor's face1 ,adventured2 that is the more simple sort1 ,more likely1 or at least of easier proof4 ,the offended prince reluctantly succumbs ,to testimony--whereof the supply ,will manifestly equal the demand-- ,this with both look and tone sententious said-- ,he makes his loving people confidant ,of his misfortune--which is also theirs-- ,and with one voice they generously cry1 ',put her away1 and wed a worthy mate4' ,the emperor listening sank into a muse1 ,which ,simon as of happy omen took4 ,nero was deeper than the sorcerer guessed2 ,his muse had really1 as that worthy framed ,his speech to have it1 of ,octavia been ,and of ,poppa in ,octavia's room2 ,but for his present prurient whim the young ,imperial profligate was fain to make ,misdeem the ,jewish pander otherwise4 ,as if ,drusilla1 not ,poppa1 had1 ,unnamed between them1 been that worthier one ,of whom the sorcerer darkly all the time ,had hinted1 and whom he himself the while ,had understood him tacitly to mean1 ,nero now said1 rousing from reverie-- ,ejaculation like soliloquy3 ,worthy to be the consort of a king6 ,perhaps well widowed--for some nobler fate ,hers by the right of beauty and of wit-- ,drusilla1 thy good mistress1 that born queen6 ,tell her this from the emperor1 and ask ,when she will let the emperor himself ,pay her his personal homage at her court2 ,some night it needs must be1 and in disguise-- ,to fool the prying people as thou saidst4 ,prove thou thy prowess as ambassador1 ,and bring me speedy word of thy success4 ,the emperor let the sorcerer retire4 ,a little pleased1 but disappointed more1 ,simon his message to his mistress brought4 ,he wreaked his disappointment upon her1 ,by rendering ,nero's proffer of himself ,in terms the most offensive to her pride3 ,know1 ,o my lady--empress1 by just right ,of high ambition and of mettle high-- ,lucius ,domitius ,nero ,csar1 proud ,young wearer of the crown that ,julius wore-- ,or would not wear1 but three times put it by-- ,successor to the great ,augustus1 who ,earth's jarring fragments welded to a whole1 ,and settled order government and peace-- ,conscious of his own merit1 condescends ,to ease his aching shoulders of the weight ,of empire by indulging now and then ,in certain little pranks of pleasantry1 ,more lively1 as might seem1 than dignified4 ,he dons him his disguise and sallying forth ,goes roystering through the streets incognito1 ,attended by a well-becoming rout ,of boon companions in hilarity-- ,much to the scandal of good citizens1 ,specially such as happen to be out2 ,these often get quite tumbled up and down ,in the wild frolic of imperial sport4 ,they make the night--these rouses are by night-- ,merry with jocund laughter1 and with song ,that would be ribald save that it is sung ,by a divine ,augustus in his cups4 ,i am permitted1 as ambassador ,from this imperial personage1 to bear ,thee courteous salutations1 and to say ,the emperor deems thee worthy to be queen1 ,thinks thou perhaps wast widowed in good time ,to make thee to a nobler fortune free2 ,begs thou wilt name the night when he may come ,in person and pay imperial court to thee4 ,this1 ,simon1 is impudence insufferable1 ,equal affront to ,nero and to me1 ,drusilla in a flame of fury said4 ,thou hast overstepped thy limit jesting so4 ,repair thy fault forthwith1 or suffer for it6 ,tell me in terms1 and without flourishes1 ,what word1 if any1 the emperor charged thee with4 ,maliciously unmoved1 the sorcerer said3 ,with some loss doubtless--most regrettable1 ,granted2 yet scarce avoidable1 confess-- ,from the august imperial dignity ,of the first utterance1 ,i have told thee true ,the message ,csar bade me bear to thee4 ,drusilla1 with rekindled anger1 cried3 ,thou hast cruelly misrepresented me1 ,to bring upon me such indignity4 ,in what mistaken terms of complaisance1 ,tell me--mistaken1 or even treacherous-- ,didst thou present me to his majesty8 ,simon1 exasperating purposely ,by his cool air of imperturbable1 ,said3 ,madam1 it seemed wisest policy-- ,best suited to avoid that compromise ,i knew to be so justly hateful to thee ,of dignity and modesty and shame-- ,so ,i observed a careful reticence1 ,but drew the emperor on from point to point ,to be first--as he was--in mentioning thee4 ,drusilla's fury now redoubled rose2 ,with blazing eyes she rather hissed than said3 ,he takes ,drusilla to be such as that6 ,will seek me under cover of the dark6 ,hark thee6 ,i to be visited by stealth1 ,the happy finish of a night's carouse6 ,give him my compliments and tell him1 ,nay6 ,bid him by daylight come1 in proper state1 ,and bringing with him his empire cast it down ,a proffered bauble at ,drusilla's feet-- ,i will consider of the matter then4 ,up1 go1 speed1 tell him what ,i thus have said4 ,i am in haste to wash this stain away1 ,and fling his insult back into his face4 ,he is mighty1 he--but ,i am haughty1 ,i2 ,i am as haughty as he mighty is3 ,i burn in hell until he knows this from me4 ,thou hangest--wilt not go8--art false to me8 ,aye1 thou art false1 or thou hadst out of hand ,told him thou knewest ,drusilla otherwise ,than to dare take her such a word as that6 ,the emperor should see my lady now1 ,said ,simon with provoking flattery1 ,provoking1 yet it mollified her mind1 ,and shaped her to receive what he would say-- ,yea1 but the emperor should behold thee thus-- ,if he would have his beauty spiced with spite1 ,and splendid with a little awfulness4 ,i have never seen thee so the queen before6 ,but1 madam1 in good sooth and soberness1 ,behooves that we consider well our way4 ,the emperor is a dangerous man--or god1 ,thou knowest they deify this personage2 ,it were not wise to tempt him overmuch4 ,yet ,i agree thy woman instinct well ,advises thee to dictate terms to him4 ,let these be high--agreed2 but not too high3 ,not quite impossible1 observe2 enough1 ,no more1 to give thee value in his eyes4 ,i think of one end that thou mightst subserve ,by a condition prior to consent-- ,an end long meditated1 and most dear1 ,not to thee only1 but no less to him1 ,thy well-belovd consort late4 ,why not ,say to the emperor3 ',give thou me a pledge ,beforehand of thy worthy sentiments ,toward thy poor vassal1 in this little thing3 ,put ,paul to death and all the cursd crew ,that hold with him1 exempting not a soul-- ,this do thou first1 ,o emperor august1 ,a very little thing1 and see if then ,thy will find let in my will2 so be ,i ,am honored as befits my quality'-- ,a guardian clause elastic of import1 ,which thou mayst after construe as thou wilt8 ,such terms ,i might obey to bear to him1 ,and they could only heighten his regard ,of thee1 and more thy hold on him assure4 ,there was ,poppa sitting by his side ,that day6 ,drusilla bitterly exclaimed4 ,and knowest thou by what arts her place she won8 ,pressed ,simon2 she was not afraid to impose ,conditions on her lover2 she told him1 ',thou must do thus1 and thus1' and he admired ,her for her spirit1 and succumbed2 do thou ,likewise1 and prove thy right to reign--by reigning4 ,it is not quite so proud to reign1 ,i grant ,thee1 as to spurn2 but bend thy pride so much3 ,spurning is fine1 but reigning profits more4 ,thou hast well advised1 my ,simon1 with strong qualms ,subdued of pride1 and loathing sprung from pride1 ,drusilla made reply2 and ,simon left ,the humbled woman to her wretchedness4 ,for she no longer now deceived herself1 ,or was by ,simon deceived1 to keep her hope ,of splendid triumph by the emperor's side4 ,salt tears and bitter1 after he had gone1 ,she stained the queenly beauty of her face ,withal and quenched the brilliance of her eyes4 ,her chalice was of disappointment full2 ,she had sinned1 and she was still to sin1 in vain3 ,she knew it1 but she did not change her choice4 ,her only comfort in her hour of shame ,was that at least a drop of sweet revenge ,and malice gratified might mingle yet-- ,a dash of soothing--in the draught she drank2 ,she yet might see her heart's desire on ,paul4 ,what if thou dost1 ,drusilla6 ,thou wilt see ,the hated dying1 not as one who dies1 ,rather as one who1 borne aloft and crowned1 ,rides celebrating triumph over death6 ,the while thou seest exalted to the place ,thou fain hadst purchased for thyself with crime ,poppa1 empress by the emperor throned1 ,spouse in the room of young ,octavia slain4 ,go1 wretched woman1 with thy little son ,beside thee1 down the valley of the years-- ,years few and evil1 full of many woes-- ,until thou shalt with him be overwhelmed ,in that volcano ruin1 thy fit doom6 ,with first obeisance to ,poppa paid 7,and blithe report to her of progress good ,toward what she wished--wanting1 he cheerly thought1 ,but one more audience to attain the goal7 ,simon betook him to the emperor1 ,who greeted him with3 ,well1 what1 pander8 ,speak6 ,no parley1 no ambages2 great affairs ,are now engaging me4 ,is all arranged8 ,what is the night appointed8 ,o1 ,i see ,broad written over all thy countenance1 ,palter1 pretext1 delay1 to tantalize ,forsooth and tease a lover's eagerness4 ,but ,i am in no mood to be played with2 ,thou balkest me at thy peril2 speak1 man1 speak6 ,what message does the fair ,drusilla send8 ,simon came hating with a perilous hate1 ,hate perilous to himself1 the emperor ,for all the scorning poured before on him2 ,now1 at such words of scorn more bitter yet1 ,his fierce resentment almost overbore ,his fear2 it threatened to burst out in flame4 ,but he was prudent and afraid enough ,to smother it--as yet2 the deeper burned ,it in his bosom1 forced to smoulder there4 ,his hatred and his fear together made ,his wit clear1 swift1 and ready to command4 ,he dared not fence1 and so he answered fair-- ,at some cost to his mistress1 more than he ,foreshadowed in obtaining her consent3 ,my lady agrees1 but does not fix the time4 ,agrees1 of course agrees1 grossly replied ,nero2 but when1 thou paltering rascal1 when8-- ,that is the point thou knowest1 and she knows4 ,lady ,drusilla begs the emperor ,will1 wily ,simon said1 do her the grace ,to choose his own time2 his choice will be hers4 ,beyond just expectation complaisant6 ,with a placated grin1 the emperor said4 ,simon made thrifty haste not to let slip ,his favorable chance precarious2 ,he spoke3 ,aye1 when thy gracious majesty ,shalt have appointed death deserved for ,paul ,and for the pestilent crew his company1 ,and shalt have signified to her thy leave ,to see the sentence visited on them-- ,the very night which follows that bright day ,of vengeance on the emperor's enemies ,shall brighter than that day to her be made ,if she may welcome then as visitant ,him who shall so have pledged her his regard4 ,ah1 so she makes conditions after all1 ,clouding his brow1 but lightly1 ,nero said4 ,a woman is a woman1 ,simon replied1 ,and queen ,drusilla is high-spirited ,doubtless beyond the common2 humor her1 ,i pray thee1 in this trifle2 thou wilt note ,how that1 in seeming so to save her pride ,somewhat1 her dignity1 her modesty1 ,she really seeks to serve a public end ,of justice and of good imperial fame4 ,thou makest her worthy of a throne indeed1 ,the emperor with indulgent sarcasm said1 ,with her wise forecast and expansive views4 ,faith toward the person of the emperor-- ,faith1 and perhaps some nearer sentiment-- ,inspires her to be large in statesmanship1 ,said ,simon--eased a moment in his mind ,to be diplomatist in honeyed lies4 ,tell her ,i will consult my oracle1 ,nero maliciously replied2 and say ,my oracle is a lady1 hence will know ,better than ,i should dare pretend ,i can ,what would be fit in such peculiar case4 ,as fountain prime of justice to my realm1 ,i own ,i have some scruples in this thing-- ,whether it were ideal right and good ,to barter sentences of life and death ,simply that ,i may please a lady fair1 ,and be a favored suitor at her court4 ,but ,i perhaps will toss a die and see ,what chance will say2 chance is a prudent god1 ,and1 in his seeming-random way1 is right ,as oft as wisdom with his reasons weighed3 ,besides ,i can keep on throwing1 till the turn ,pleases my fancy of the moment4 ,go1 ,solemn ambassador from court to court1 ,report what ,i have said1 but give a wink ,at end to mean thou guessest all is well4 ,simon1 retiring1 soon ,poppa sought1 ,and1 with dark hint and indirection1 told ,how he had dropped into the emperor's ear ,a seed of such suggestion as1 he thought1 ,would quickly spring and blossom and bear fruit ,to the advantage of her dearest wish3 ,it would but need attaint ,octavia's faith ,as consort of the emperor1 and so1 ,by open operation of the law1 ,set her aside and leave him lorn of wife4 ,the acclamation of the people then ,would join the emperor's own desire to fill ,octavia's vacant room with--whom but one8 ,but would ,poppa help him in one thing8 ,he greatly wished to give the emperor proof ,of what he could accomplish in his art ,of conjuring with weird supernatural powers2 ,he thought his weight as intermediary ,in her behalf would be increased thereby4 ,poppa1 promising to stir up the mind ,of ,nero to a proper appetite ,for ,simon's thaumaturgy1 let him go4 ,while such fruits in the dark were growing ripe1 ,things in the open looked the self-same way4 ,stephen1 who daily scouted in the world ,without of ,rome1 its rumor1 its event1 ,brought thence one day to ,paul ill-boding word3 ,burrus is dead1 that just man2 how he died1 ,whether of sickness1 poison1 suicide1 ,no man can say--or rather all men say1 ,some1 one thing1 some1 another2 doubtful all4 ,but two men take his place in prefecture1 ,one1 ,tigellinus--baser none than he3 ,i doubt thou wilt come to feel his heavy hand4 ,then that vile woman ,poppa1 so they say1 ,has become ,jewish proselyte1 forsooth4 ,wherefore8 ,no doubt1 colluding with ,drusilla-- ,the wicked ,simon with his sorcery1 ,and with his office low of go-between1 ,egging them on--to be ,jews good enough1 ,the three together1 to act in ,shimei's place ,as thine accusers to the emperor4 ,o1 my heart sinks in doubt and fear for thee6 ,it need not1 ,stephen2 my heart is buoyant1 ,paul ,said to his nephew in calm and firm reply4 ,nothing can fall out from the order fair ,of ,god's will for ,his chosen and well-beloved2 ,all things together work for good to them4 ,all things8 said ,stephen2 ,lord1 increase my faith6 ,for he hung staggered at the paradox4 ,o1 yea1 all things1 exception none1 said ,paul4 ,but hardly had been uttered those strong words1 ,when1 in the door1 rudely burst open1 stood ,two armd minions of the prefecture4 ,wanted1 for torture on the witness-rack-- ,one of these spoke in strident tones and hard-- ,onesimus1 a ,phrygian runaway1 ,slave of the late lord ,felix1 harbored here4 ,point out the rogue2 we are under strait command1 ,and ,tigellinus will brook no delay4 ,ah1 there he is--he has betrayed himself-- ,white as a corpse2 were he as innocent6 ,come1 rascal1 and cheer thee up1 thou art to have ,thy ,syrus for a fellow on the rack4 ,with rally such1 in coarsest irony1 ,they hurried off ,onesimus to doom-- ,scarce time to ,paul for breathing in his ear ,to bid him in the strength of ,christ be strong4 ,o1 uncle1 'all things' to ,onesimus1 ,him also1 in a fearful stead like this8 ,said ,stephen1 in vicarious agony4 ,would ,i could take his stead for him6 said ,paul4 ,i cannot1 but ,christ can1 and will--nay1 did1 ,then when ,he suffered all on ,calvary4 ,pray for ,onesimus that he his trust ,withdraw not from the ,lord who thus proves him-- ,and pray for ,syrus that his faith fail not4 ,now1 ,o ,lord ,jesus1 in ,gethsemane ,and on the bitter cross of ,calvary ,thyself so anguished once in that frail flesh ,thou worest for our sake--that ,thou mightst suffer6-- ,help1 help1 thy servants in their sudden hour4 ,the soldier that was manacled to ,paul ,wondered1 but reverenced1 when these things he heard4 ,,book ,,xxiv4 ,,the ,,end4 ,the two slaves1 ,onesimus and ,syrus1 bear their torture with constancy1 refusing to testify otherwise than in grateful praise of ,paul4 ,the emperor1 at ,seneca's prompting1 has secretly overheard their testimony1 and1 obeying a caprice of justice and of pity1 he follows a further hint from ,seneca to let ,paul go free under bond to appear again when formal accusation shall be laid against him from ,jerusalem4 ,paul thus released sends home to ,holy ,land the friends that had thence accompanied him to ,rome1 and accomplishes his last missionary tours1 with ,luke only for companion4 ,meantime ,drusilla1 in a desperate hope revived by the rumored fall from imperial favor of ,poppa1 sends ,simon once more to secure for his mistress the long-postponed meeting with ,nero4 ,simon plays ,drusilla false and pretends to the emperor that she had indulgently sent him1 ,simon1 to sue on his own behalf for the privilege of practising his art in the palace4 ,nero agrees that he may do this on condition that he shall first have secured from his mistress fresh consent to receive an imperial visit in her house4 ,simon1 stung by the emperor's scorn of him1 had wrought himself up to the temerity of attempting to play on ,nero's guilty conscience by an exhibition that should bring up before the tyrant a dreadful recollection of one of his own most heinous crimes4 ,the result proves suddenly fatal to ,simon4 ,paul1 brought back in due time for trial1 becomes the victim not only of enmity openly working under legal forms against him1 but of secret intrigue for unholy personal purposes on the emperor's part4 ,condemned to die1 after having been permitted first to speak in his own defence1 the apostle is led to a suburb of ,rome1 and there beheaded4 ,luke1 enjoined thereto by ,paul1 gives to his kindred and friends in ,palestine an account of the end1 of which he was eye-witness4 ,,the ,,end4 ,onesimus and ,syrus had been seized ,to make them swear a dreadful perjury2 ,it was persuasion from ,drusilla wrought ,with ,tigellinus to commit this deed ,of outrage against ruth and righteousness3 ,those bondmen should be brought1 by utmost pangs ,wreaked on them in the anguish of the rack1 ,to charge ,paul with the poisoning of her spouse4 ,drusilla first had vainly sought to bribe ,poor ,syrus to that lie and perfidy4 ,smiles1 blandishments1 entreaties1 promises1 ,failing--she next1 with scourgings from her tongue1 ,threats1 thrusts from female weapons in her hands1 ,had striven to warp him to her wish--in vain4 ,at last she1 giving him up for torture1 yet ,bade him remember he need only swear1 ,therein supported by ,onesimus1 ,that from ,paul's hand he had a dust received-- ,impalpable1 so fine--of unknown power ,to work unknown effect upon a man1 ,and had by ,paul instructed been to sift ,this secretly into some draught his lord ,would drink1 and watch how it would gladden him-- ,that he had only to protest that lie1 ,confessing then that1 in all innocence ,of childish curiosity to see1 ,he did it when his mistress sent by him ,a sleeping-draught to ,felix in his bath-- ,only just this1 and straight for both of them1 ,onesimus with ,syrus1 the sharp pains ,and rending of the question should be stayed4 ,syrus said sadly to ,onesimus3 ,o1 would that ,paul were here to give us heart6 ,jesus is here1 and ,he will give us heart1 ,onesimus replied2 let us trust ,him4 ,i fear ,i shall be broken to their will1 ,said ,syrus1 and swear whatever they desire2 ,i am so in terror of the frightful pain6 ,this was while they were binding the poor slaves ,upon the rack4 ,his comrade spoke in cheer3 ',lo1 ,i am with you alway1' ,jesus said2 ,he will not let us suffer overmuch4 ,i shall not wonder if ,he take away ,the pain1 almost--or altogether even4 ,for ,he abideth faithful--so ,paul says1 ,and ,paul has proved it over and over again4 ,at any rate1 the promise ,jesus made ,to ,paul once1 when his need was very sore1 ,will be as good to us in this our stead2 ,his grace will be sufficient for us still4 ,the dread is heavier than the pain will be4 ,and it was so2 for after the first wrench1 ,which well-nigh solved the jointings of their limbs1 ,the spirit rose the sovereign of the flesh ,and bore those helpless victims of the rack ,triumphant as in painless ecstasy4 ,their mortal frames became as instruments ,of music underneath the player's hand2 ,for every quivering nerve within them strung ,responded to the running torture's touch ,in bursts of exclamation like the notes ,of a song sung to some pathetic tune ,wherein the pathos still keeps triumphing3 ,lord ,jesus1 this for ,thee6 ,and this6 ,o1 joy ,that we are counted worthy thus to suffer6 ,it is not suffering1 since for ,thee we suffer6 ,meanwhile to every challenge touching ,paul1 ,though thrills of anguish broke their speech to cries1 ,they said1 and would forever only say3 ,he taught us nothing but to reverence ,our masters with all good fidelity ,of service rendered them out of true hearts ,as to the ,lord in heaven and not to men4 ,by secret orders from the emperor ,the torture-room was cunningly contrived ,to be a sort of whispering gallery1 ,an ear of ,dionysius1 to resound ,whatever might be uttered from the rack ,wrung out of victims put to question there-- ,words1 cries1 sighs1 groans1 or moans of agony-- ,and carry them to distance where above1 ,if one should listen1 they might all be heard4 ,here ,nero laid a listening ear that day-- ,seneca's prompting1 who was present too-- ,and heard ,onesimus and ,syrus bear ,their steadfast witness on behalf of ,paul1 ,with adjuration mingled of a ,name4 ,the not yet utterly extinguished spark ,of human in that indurated breast 7,perhaps therewith effect of fear infused-- ,divinely--at such adjuration heard7 ,responded in a transitory glow ,of something gentle that resembled ruth ,toward those poor sufferers faithful against pain2 ,of something that resembled justice too ,toward ,paul so stoutly witnessed for by them4 ,he forthwith bade release the witnesses2 ,and hearkened to a counsel touching ,paul4 ,for ,seneca adventured this to him-- ,a farewell flicker of his influence1 ,ere ,tigellinus overbore him quite--3 ,shouldst thou think well it might indeed be well1 ,to loose this ,jewish prisoner from his thrall-- ,he giving surety under ample bond ,to answer with his person at the bar ,of ,csar upon summons1 to be tried ,whenever shall appear accusers sent ,accredited from ,jerusalem to ,rome4 ,so out of darkness there sprang up a light ,to ,paul1 and for that present he went free4 ,soon at a meeting of thanksgiving held ,to celebrate with praises to the ,lord ,his unexpected riddance out of thrall ,paul to his brethren and his kindred said3 ,my life reprieved from threatened death in shame1 ,i dedicate anew to ,christ the ,lord4 ,i go hence1 parting from you all with tears ,of joyful love1 and thanks for love again ,mine in full measure from so many hearts ,that have not here my bonds in ,christ despised-- ,i go hence1 in the ,spirit bound1 to bear ,far as ,i may abroad in all the world ,the glorious gospel of the blessd ,god4 ,pray for me that ,i may be sped in peace1 ,and that before me doors of utterance may ,swing open wide wherever ,i am led4 ,the time is short for all of us2 for me ,shorter1 it may be1 than our present joy ,buoys us to hope4 ,perhaps the ,lord will come ,and find me waking still--and not asleep-- ,to welcome ,him descending in the air4 ,amen6 ,so may it be6 ,lord ,jesus1 come6 ,and yet1 belovd1 though these words ,i speak1 ,a more prevailing prescience in my heart ,forewarns me ,i shall witness with my blood ,for ,him who suffered unto blood for me4 ,if so it be1 amen6 ,lord ,jesus1 yea1 ,thy will for me is my will for myself2 ,i spring to it with joy1 or far or near-- ,unknown to me--enough that it is ,thine6 ,so1 farewell1 ye4 ,watch and remember1 all1 ,that by the space of two full years in chains ,i have not ceased to warn you night and day1 ,each one1 with tears4 ,and now1 behold1 ,i know ,that some of you to whom ,i have fulfilled ,this ministry shall see my face no more4 ,o1 brethren1 ,i commend you unto ,god6 ,be perfect1 be of brave and hopeful cheer1 ,be of one mind1 abide in peace1 and ,he1 ,the ,god of love and peace1 shall with you be4 ,o1 how my heart is large toward you6 ,the love ,of ,god1 the grace of our ,lord ,jesus ,christ1 ,and the communion of the ,holy ,ghost ,be with you and abound--ever6 ,amen6 ,therewith ,paul kneeled and prayed a breaking prayer2 ,and they all wept1 and he wept with them all1 ,they falling on his neck and kissing him ,in love and sorrow4 ,each one with himself ',among them1 ,i8' asked1 and so sorrowed most ,of all for that word which he spoke1 ,i know ,that some of you shall see my face no more4 ,paul sent his kindred and his lovers--those ,who for his sake had sailed with him to ,rome-- ,back to find home again in ,holy ,land1 ,while he1 with ,luke for his companion sole1 ,should run his rounds of mission through the world4 ,but what ye can1 he said1 before ye go1 ,comfort ,onesimus and ,syrus1 sick ,with wounding for ,christ's sake and mine2 ,i have ,already bathed ,onesimus with tears ,of love1 and bidden him in ,christ be strong3 ,ye will not leave him till his health be whole ,at least enough to take the journey back ,to our ,philemon1 bearing thanks from me4 ,those here in ,rome that love me ,i shall trust ,to speed both you and him with needful aid-- ,even as ,i trust them not to let me lack4 ,onesimus no doubt will find a way ,that ye could not1 nor ,i1 to carry help ,to ,syrus in his far more wretched case-- ,beset with household craft and cruelty4 ,pray ye for him2 and lade ,onesimus ,in seeking ,syrus deep with love from me4 ,christ will not fail him1 if he fail not ,christ2 ',it is but for a moment1 all the pain1' ,charge it upon ,onesimus to say1 ',but for eternal ages is the joy6' ,now unto such as can receive it ,i1 ,under this present imminence of woe ,forerunning the return of ,christ the ,lord1 ,give counsel not to marry but abide ,in undistracted waiting for the ,day4 ,yet for our ,stephen and ,eunic here1 ,already long betrothed and lovers true1 ,my will is as their will is2 let them wed4 ,stephen as husband to ,eunic can ,in journeying better fend both her and ,ruth ,her mother2 he as well can fend his own1 ,rachel1 the only--sister of my heart6 ,paul's voice a little failed him1 ending thus2 ,and all took knowledge how his kindred love ,broke over him1 a wave of tenderness6 ,so ,stephen and ,eunic wedded were1 ,paul each in turn adjuring solemnly3 ,thou1 ,o ,eunic1 wilt as wife be true1 ,that know ,i well1 to whom thou thus hast wed4 ,submit thyself to him in loyal love1 ,and as in pledged obedience to the ,lord-- ,less to his will so yielding than to ,christ's4 ,for ,god ordains it that the husband be ,head to the wife1 as to the church is ,christ4 ,but thou1 ,o ,stephen1 judge what sanction so ,is on the husband laid1 to be how pure1 ,above self-will and selfishness how high1 ,how full of ministration and of help1 ,how ready ever to self-sacrifice ,for the wife's sake1 how gentle and how kind6 ,thou1 therefore1 ,stephen1 love thy wife1 even so ,as the ,lord ,jesus loved the church1 ,his bride1 ,and for her gave ,himself4 ,be happy1 ye1 ,belovd1 in a love so sanctified4 ,paul blessed them1 and they felt that they were blessed4 ,when soon from ,rome they took their homeward way-- ,ruth1 ,rachel1 and the newly-wedded pair-- ,they wept that they had looked their last on ,paul2 ,wept with rejoicing that1 a little while1 ,and the ,lord coming would make all things glad4 ,now ,sergius ,paulus chose it for his part ,to fill ,paul's purse1 speeding him on his way2 ,but ,krishna was of mind himself to go ,with those who would return to ,holy ,land4 ,he longed with his own eyes to see the scenes ,amid which ,jesus lived ,his life on earth ,and to glean up from the tradition found ,haply there current in the mouths of men ,concerning ,him1 both what ,he taught and what ,he was3 the ,indian's thought was he would then1 ,full-laden with such treasures of the ,west1 ,to his own native ,east return and there ,dispense them to enrich his countrymen4 ,paul bade him prosper in his wish1 and go4 ,acquitted thus of all his natural cares1 ,and joyful in the sense of his reprieve1 ,and springing toward the work that he would do1 ,and for that work renewed in strength by hope ,and faith and love and zeal unquenchable ,and passion for the saving of the souls ,of men1 his fellows1 perishing in sin-- ,much more1 by the almighty hand of ,god ,upon him stayed in an immortal youth-- ,that spent old man1 refusing to be spent ,though spending daily like the river of ,god1 ,set forward1 ,luke alone companion now1 ,to send with torch in hand a running fire ,of gospel conflagration round the world4 ,go1 ,paul1 forgetful of thyself1 make speed6 ,thou shalt not be forgotten of thy ,god6 ,go1 with that treasure for thy fellows fraught6 ,go1 with the future of the world in trust6 ,nowhere in utmost islands of the sea1 ,never till time shall be no more1 shall men ,not owe thee debt for blessings manifold-- ,crowning the life that now is1 frail and fleet1 ,crowning the nobler life that is to be-- ,blessings theirs but because thou wouldst not shrink ,from whatsoever hardship1 peril1 harm1 ,loss1 toil1 self-sacrifice to martyrdom4 ,so thou mightst scatter far and wide for us ,the deathless seeds of that which we enjoy ,in harvest of all good1 civility ,of morals and of manners1 science1 art1 ,fair order1 freedom1 progress1 light and life1 ,and1 overvaulting all1 the hope of heaven6 ,while ,paul his circuits was accomplishing1 ,paul's enemies 7and ours7 were not remiss1 ,whether in ,rome or in ,jerusalem4 ,drusilla1 disappointed of her hopes ,with ,nero to ensnare his heart and be ,assumed to sit beside him on his throne1 ,even cheated for the moment of the glut ,she thought she had purchased at such cost to pride ,of extreme vengeance visited on ,paul1 ,was sullenly but more than ever bent ,not to fail yet of at least that desire4 ,she saw ,octavia1 sent to exile1 way ,make for ,poppa's spousals2 heard the shout ,of shallow hollow popular acclaim ,that hailed her hated rival conqueror1 ,bearing her as on billows of applause ,to the high seat herself had hoped for once6 ,envy and hatred ulcerous ate her heart-- ,but not despair2 despair was not for her3 ,malignity was fuel still to hope4 ,she despatched ,simon to ,jerusalem ,to blow the embers smouldering there to flame ,of deadly accusation against ,paul3 ,simon was ,shimei risen from the dead1 ,shimei in all his pristine force unspent4 ,the elders of the ,jews commissioned him1 ,with others to whom he was heart and head1 ,to press at ,rome for ,paul the doom of death4 ,meantime the mouth of common fame began ,to whisper that ,poppa1 though a wife ,to ,nero now--perhaps because a wife ,and mother of a daughter1 ,claudia1 born ,to him--no longer charmed him as of old4 ,unholy hope flared up a flicker of flame ,delusive in ,drusilla's breast once more4 ,octavia1 when her husband tired of her1 ,went into exile and then went to death ,to give ,poppa room2 ,poppa's turn ,perhaps was nearing to make room for her1 ,drusilla6 ',up1 ,o heart6' she inly cried4 ,the emperor had indeed with fickle whim1 ,dazed by some intercepting lure more nigh1 ,forgotten quite his thought of tryst with her-- ,as her conditions too he had not met4 ,but her conditions now were well in train1 ,she trusted1 to fulfill themselves on ,paul2 ,and if before1 some trace of conscience left ,in ,nero interfered to make him pause1 ,such scruple would no longer be a let ,to his desire1 should his desire revive1 ,of meeting her upon the terms she fixed ,to satisfy at once her hate1 her pride4 ,simon then1 from ,jerusalem returned ,blithe with his prosperous mission and with hope1 ,should go once more to ,nero for her cause4 ,and ,simon went1 but went not for her cause4 ,he had a purpose of his own to serve-- ,purpose malignant1 fatuous--which1 fulfilled1 ,would swift recoil in ruin on himself4 ,no worship to ,poppa's setting sun ,paid by him now to win his way at court1 ,he boldly in ,drusilla's name besought ,access to the imperial ear3 that name ,procured him instant audience4 ,discomposed ,a little by the sudden way he made ,simon stood faltering1 and before his wit ,was ready with apt words the emperor spoke3 ,what will thy mistress8 ,she perhaps has thought ,the emperor was a trifle slow to claim ,his privilege at her court8 ,bid her take heart2 ,things now begin to shape themselves aright4 ,by this time ,simon had recovered himself2 ,he said3 ,my mistress is indulgent1 ,sire4 ,knowing my fondness for my art1 and wish ,that ,i might entertain the emperor1 ,she begs thou wilt appoint a time for me-- ,o1 aye1 the emperor said2 return to her1 ,and if thou canst bring promptly back to me ,assurance of her grace that she forgives ,my tardiness in the past1 and will receive ,me yet upon the terms she fixed before-- ,somewhat abated1 aye1 but in the main ,whole2 for although the rabble rest she named ,are scattered and not worth regathering1 ,paul ,is under hand again1 duly accused1 ,and freely may be dealt with to our wish-- ,bring1 ,i say1 word to me that she consents1 ,and thou shalt exercise for me thine art ,at pleasure here within my palace halls4 ,go1 and good speed1 ambassador of love6 ,the sarcasm and the irony took effect ,to quicken in the sorcerer his resolve3 ,for ,simon his own doom was teeming now4 ,he was infatuate with the vain conceit ,that he the secret in his art possessed ,of a mock-supernatural power to play ,upon the conscience of the emperor ,and fill his conscious breast with guilty fears3 ,so once he saw ,paul play on ,felix's1 ,making him shudder on his judgment-throne2 ,aye1 and so he himself in sequel played ,on the same kingly culprit with his spells4 ,beyond all1 ,simon was beside himself ,with suffocated hatred seeking breath ,in freak of demonstration on the man ,who in the wantonness of despotic pride ,had so despised and mocked and flouted him4 ,mad thus--judicially1 and doubly--he1 ,having brought back the word the emperor wished1 ,and had the promised day appointed him1 ,dared an audacious and a fatal thing4 ,a series of phantasmagories shown ,by him1 he closed with a presentment1 clear ,in outline cast upon the palace wall ,in shapes of shadow moving like grim life1 ,of the dread scene of ,agrippina's death3 ,there hung the vessel on a glassy sea2 ,the coping timbers causelessly fell down1 ,but missed the empress-mother figured there2 ,there followed then the ghastly after-act ,of mother-murder done in pantomime-- ,more ghastly1 that it passed in silence all4 ,simon mistook--it was his last mistake6 ,he had overweened both of the power his own1 ,and of the emperor's openness to fear4 ,nero sat gazing on the spectacle ,with heed moveless1 and mute1 and ominous1 ,till the device was acted to the end4 ,then still no sign he gave--save summons sent ,bidding two household soldiers straight come in4 ,to these he coldly1 curtly1 only said3 ,crucify me this ,jew2 do it at once6 ,be gentle with him2 make him last for days1 ,and every day bring me report of him4 ,simon bethought him as he shuddering went ,hustled and hurried to that sudden doom1 ,of his gold hoarded long for utmost need3 ,he offered it in ransom for his life4 ,the soldiers took it1 share and share alike ,between them1 but it did not buy his life6 ,simon died miserably upon the cross4 ',i have abolished him6' the emperor thought-- ',the adamantine front of impudence6 ,whimsical way of paying a lady court1 ,to crucify her conjurer out of hand6 ,i hope she did not greatly care for him6 ,happily if she did ,i can repair ,the loss to her by putting ,paul to death4 ,strange1 they should hate that blameless man so much6 ,but reasons of state are strong--and reasons of love2 ,i must propitiate with a sacrifice4 ,jove is compelled by fate mightier than he6' ,the tetrarch ,herod1 to content the whim ,and hatred of his wife ,herodias1 ,once at petition of her daughter fair-- ,whose dancing measures beat at festival ,before him had1 forsooth1 the monarch pleased6-- ,sent to behead ,john ,baptist in his prison3 ,so ,nero now in mind delivered ,paul ,to death--an unconsidered pledge and pawn ,of complaisance to a base woman paid4 ,as were a star by some avulsive force ,malignant sheer from out her pathway torn ,where she went singing her celestial way ,happy but to fulfill ,his high decree ,who orbed her and who sped her on her course 7,thenceforth to be abolished from a heaven ,lighted no longer with her lucent beams672 ,so ,paul was in his heavenly circuits stayed ,and wrenched thence by the hand of violent power4 ,rome had already round him flung the loop ,of her long lasso irresistible1 ,and drawn him home to ,csar to be judged4 ,no little damped because their head was gone1 ,but more because he so had disappeared1 ,the ,jews commissioned from ,jerusalem ,pressed fierce their suit against their fellow-,jew4 ,nero's assessors sat without their chief2 ,for ,nero was grown indolent and lax1 ,and he deputed his judicial powers4 ,yet oft deigned he to give his deputies ,hint of what judgment he desired from them2 ,and they now knew the doom required for ,paul4 ,paul was left lonely of all men save ,luke2 ,but ,luke the faithful chose with him his part4 ,paul longed for ,timothy1 and wrote to him ,bidding him haste and bring ,john ,mark to ,rome4 ,but the end hasted more than these could haste1 ,and ,timothy was never in the flesh ,to greet again that father of his soul ,who1 for the son's sake more than for his own1 ,yearned toward the son to fix in him his faith ,seen nigh to falter in the face of things ,such as now fronted ,paul4 ,john ,mark though once ,in haste of spirit sundered from ,paul's part1 ,had long before been won again--to bide ,thenceforward ever fast in loyalty2 ,but as not ,timothy1 so neither he ,would comfort ,paul in this his last assay4 ,so much the more ,paul's lonely fortitude ,in witness amid storms of obloquy ,and under the impending threat of doom1 ,then against doom itself upon him fallen1 ,should at need brace them both to martyrdom4 ,most exquisitely human-hearted1 ,paul ,could not but feel full sore his loneliness-- ,loneliness more for sense of being forsaken4 ,demas1 to ,timothy he sighed1 has loved ,this present world1 and has forsaken me4 ,all men forsook me the first time ,i stood ,to make my answer at the judgment-bar2 ,i pray it be not laid to their account6 ,nobly repined6--yet for a moment only2 ,then cheerly added1 this1 and thankfully3 ,of men not one stood with me2 but the ,lord1 ,he with me stood1 and cheered and strengthened me1 ,that all the gentiles might the gospel hear2 ,and for that time from out the lion's mouth ,i was delivered4 ,yea1 and betide what may1 ,still the ,lord ,jesus will deliver me ,from every machination of ill men1 ,and to ,his heavenly kingdom bring me safe4 ,to whom be glory evermore6 ,amen6 ,enjoined thereto by ,paul1 ,luke bore from ,rome ,to ,rachel and the rest in ,holy ,land-- ,that dear companionship of kindred hearts-- ,the tidings how all ended with his death2 ,yet how1 before he died1 and when he died1 ,he conquered gloriously4 ,luke said to them3 ,he was not taken at all at unawares2 ,nothing surprised and nothing daunted him4 ,nay1 he rejoiced in spirit that all was now ,finished for him on earth2 that he might lay ,his warrior's harness off and take his crown4 ,he said this to his judges with such calm ,clear consciousness of speaking simple truth1 ,such sober confidence devoid of vaunt1 ,that something like conviction seized on them ,listening2 while on the listening multitude-- ,for the basilica was thronged--,i felt ,fall a great hush and a pathetic awe4 ',i know well whom ,i have believed1' he said1 ',and my persuasion is complete that ,he ,is able to keep that which ,i have given ,in trust to ,him against the coming day4 ,yea1 ye will surely send me hence to die2 ,the time of my departure ye have set2 ,so much is in your power to do to me2 ,but there is more1 far more1 beyond your power4 ,life ye can take1 but not the good of life4 ,the good of life is lodged where it is safe1 ,and life indeed no power can take from me2 ,that is committed to almighty hands1 ,almighty1 and all-faithful1 and all-wise3 ,there it is mine1 inalienably mine4 ,so there is that in me which bides secure ,from any terror men can threat me with4 ,a witness in my heart attests that ,i ,have fought the good fight1 fought it to the end2 ,that ,i have run my race and touched the goal2 ,through all temptation1 ,i have kept the faith4 ,i strain my eyes before me and ,i see1 ,shining1 a crown1 the crown of righteousness1 ,held in the hand once pierced and pierced for me ,of the arisen ,lord and glorified1 ,the righteous ,judge who will award the prize4 ,that prize he holds for me'--,hereon1 ,luke said1 ,paul turned toward where ,i stood--,o1 how ,i wished ,there had been many others with me then ,to hear what ,i heard1 and to take his look1 ,that kindling look of large vicarious hope6-- ,paul turned toward me his heaven-illumined face1 ,and added3 ',yea1 for me holds--nor for me ,alone1 but with me all men also who ,have loved the bright appearing of the ,lord4 ',i have been bound1 but not the word of ,god2 ,that has run freely1 sped around the world4 ,i am to die1 but the quick word of ,god1 ,so much incapable of dying1 lives ,forever an invulnerable life4 ,this ,roman empire1 like those empires old1 ,will crumble into dust and pass away2 ,the temples and the palaces of ,rome ,will vanish like a vision from men's eyes2 ,but the majestic kingdom of my ,god ,will stand forever and forever grow4 ,within its walls1 ,i have not built in vain2 ,for ,i have founded on a corner-stone ,that never will be moved4 ,the earth we tread ,will tremble and be moved out of its place2 ,the heavens above us1 sun and moon and star1 ,will yet be rolled together like a scroll1 ,or folded like a vestment laid aside2 ,but what on ,jesus ,christ for corner-stone ,i1 with much prayer and many tears1 in faith ,have builded to the glory of ,his grace1 ,will still in ever-during beauty shine4 ',but though ,i speak thus of the vanishing ,of all this fabric of a mighty state1 ,all this imperial pomp and power of ,rome1 ,and the succeeding of an order new1 ,a heavenly kingdom with a heavenly ,king1 ,yet know1 ,o judges1 that in all good faith1 ,i ever everywhere have taught and shown ,loyal submission to the powers that be4 ,by letter1 ere ,i came myself to ,rome1 ,i charged this duty on my brethren here2 ,i told them they could not in any wise ,obedient be to ,god1 and not obey ,the powers by ,him set over them to rule3 ,ask my disciples1 make them witnesses1 ,they all will testify ,i taught them thus4 ,not that my life is such a prize to me2 ,but ,i would have the holy name of ,him ,who bought me with ,his blood1 and made of me ,a herald of ,his glorious grace to men-- ,yea1 ,i would have that ever-blessd ,name ,pure of reproach through me before you all4 ',i thank my judges that at least ,i may ,thus freely speak once more before ,i die4 ,a cloud of witnesses around me here ,hangs in my eye2 ,i might behold1 beyond ,these and above1 innumerably bright1 ,thick ranks of hovering angels beckoning me2 ,but ,i stretch out my hands in suit to these1 ,my fellows1 and beseech them one and all1 ,and you1 my judges1 ,i beseech--and would ,i might beseech the whole world with my voice ,now speaking for its last time in men's ears6-- ,be reconciled through ,jesus ,christ to ,god4 ,with me it is a light thing to be judged ,of men2 albeit obeisance due ,i pay ,to this tribunal as ordained of ,god4 ,but ,i look forward to be judged of ,one ,before whose eyes the secrets of men's hearts ,lie open like the pages of a book4 ,and ye too all who judge me1 and all these ,who see me judged--yea1 and himself1 your head1 ,the emperor1 with his counsellors1 and all ,that under earth slumber or in the sea1 ,the living generations and the dead1 ,one congregation and assembly called ,at last together whencesoever found1 ,shall stand before the judgment-seat of ,christ4 ,o1 ,i adjure you and entreat you1 hear ,betimes my message sent from ,god to you4 ,one advocate alone1 none other1 can ,plead to the ,father with effect for you4 ,but ,he can1 for it is the ,judge ,himself ,will be your advocate1 if but you will ,now choose ,him to be such1 and ,he will speak ,for you with a resistless eloquence ,of wounds shown in ,his hands and feet and side1 ,signs of ,his suffering borne in the behalf ,of all those who will come to ,god by ,him4 ',i have a vision of that judgment-scene3 ,these wide-embracing walls ,i see expand ,to the horizon's utmost rim around2 ,this roof is lifted to the top of heaven2 ,this multitude is multiplied to count ,beyond all count2 yon judgment-throne becomes ,dazzling beyond the splendors of the sun ,with an exceeding whiteness1 such as eye ,of man nor angel can abide to see2 ,and ,he that sits thereon1 and makes it dark ,by the excess of brightness in ,his face1 ,speaks1 and ,his voice to hear is as the sound ,of many waters rolling down in flood4 ,i heard that voice once speaking from the sky ,amid a blaze of light falling around ,me at midnoon that blanched the ,syrian sun ,burning from his meridian height on me4 ,o men1 my brethren1 it was a dread voice2 ,but ,i obeyed it1 and ,i therefore lived4 ,obey it ye1 heard speaking through my lips ,and bidding1 ,come6 ,o1 sweet and dreadful voice1 ,both sweet and dreadful1 uttering now that word6 ,dreadful1 not sweet1 it then will sound to those ,who hearing thus the invitation1 ,come1 ,harden their hearts to disobey4 ,for then ,in changed tones it will speak a different word4 ',hence1 cursd of my ,father6' it will say1 ,and drive the disobedient as with sword ,of flame forth issuing and pursuing them1 ,pursuing and devouring1 while they fly ,in vain forever and forever far ,before it1 and no refuge anywhere ,in all the boundless universe of ,god ,find from the fiery fangs of that fierce sword6' ,i never saw1 said ,luke1 such pity cast ,such pathos over such solemnity1 ,such faithfulness to ,god1 to man1 as then1 ,while he in that hushed audience spoke these things1 ,lived in ,paul's looks and tuned his prophet tones4 ,no one that listened and beheld escaped ,the power of ,god2 and some perhaps believed4 ,but they condemned the guiltless man to die2 ,and1 like his ,lord1 he died without the gates4 ,they led him to a chosen spot not far ,beyond the city walls--he all the way ,seen walking like one meekly triumphing2 ,for a train followed and attended him1 ,before whom he was as a conqueror4 ,where gushed a fountain in a pine-tree shade ,suburban1 there they made their prisoner stay4 ,here they beheaded him2 ,christ suffered it-- ,what matter to ,his servant how he died8 ,the pain was short1 if sharp2 perhaps indeed ,there was no pain at all1 but only swift ,transition to a state of perfect rest ,from pain1 from weariness1 from every ill1 ,forever in the presence of the ,lord4 ,the dear dissevered head we joined again ,to the worn-weary body as we could3 ,we comforted ourselves to see the peace ,that the white-shining countenance expressed1 ,and stanched our tears and eased our aching hearts ,to think that all his toil was over now1 ,and all the contradiction he so long ,had suffered from his thankless fellow-men2 ,and that he had aspired triumphantly ,at last to be at home with ,christ in heaven1 ,there to behold the glory that ,he had1 ,ere the beginning of the world1 with ,god ,his ,father4 ,so we buried him in hope ,there on the selfsame spot where he had fallen2 ,and said to one another the great words1 ,heroic1 heartening1 full of heavenly truth1 ,himself with streaming tears once spoke to us-- ,you will remember--then when ,mary died1 ,and when we buried her that sunset hour ,there on that holy hill in ,melita4 ,with such a gentle cadence to his tale1 ,luke ended2 and those sat in silence long1 ,remembering with sweet heart-ache what had been4 ,then1 having knelt together first in prayer1 ,and having lifted a pathetical ,high hymn of triumph over death1 they rose ,calm and addressed themselves anew to life3 ,a little patience and the ,lord would come4 99 99 99 99 99 ,,by ,,the ,,same ,,author ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,saul ,a ,,companion ,,to ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,paul ,saul of ,tarsus1 brought up at ,jerusalem1 a pupil of ,gamaliel1 the most celebrated ,rabbi of his time1 from setting out as eager but pacific controversialist in public dispute against the preachers of the ,gospel1 changes into a virulent1 bloody persecutor of ,christians1 and ends by abruptly becoming himself a ,christian and a teacher of ,christianity4 ,,the ,,epic ,,of ,,saul tells the story of this4 ,it is the great success of the poem1 says ,prof4 ,john ,a4 ,paine1 to put the reader in the place of those who opposed the rising and rapidly spreading faith in ,jesus1 and to unfold a marvellous insight into the reasonings1 motives1 intrigues1 and action of those actually engaged in trying to suppress the new movement2 and thus1 it helps to form a remarkably vivid conception of the crisis1 and to gain a deeper understanding of the conflict4 ,saul in the ,council ,stephen's face saw shine ,as it had been an angel's1 but his heart ,to the august theophany was blind-- ,blinded by hatred of the fervent saint1 ,and hatred of the ,lord who in him shone1 ,what blindfold hatred such could work of ill ,in nature meant for utter nobleness1 ,then how the hatred could to love be turned1 ,the proud wrong will to lowly right be brought1 ,and ,paul the 'servant' spring from rebel ,saul-- ,this1 ye who love in man the good and fair1 ,and joy to hail retrieved the good and fair-- ,from the unfair and evil1 hearken all ,and speed me with your wishes while ,i sing4-- --,from the ,proem4 ,,appreciative ,,criticisms4 ,decidedly impressive and attractive4444 ,one never wants to lay the book down1 and reads it through with increasing1 rather than flagging interest4--,,the ,,spectator1 ,london4 ,dr4 ,wilkinson's ,epic of ,saul is daring in conception1 subtle in analysis1 exquisite in delineation1 stately in movement1 dramatic in unfolding1 rythmical in expression1 reverent in tone1 uplifting in tendency4 ,the ,poem of ,saul is as truly an epic as ,milton's ,paradise ,lost4 --,,rev4 ,,george ,,dana ,,boardman1 ,d4,d4 #hvo1 ,cloth1 ,gilt top1 #chf pp4 ,price1 #a4ej1 post-free4 ,epic of ,saul1 and ,epic of ,paul together1 #c4jj4 ,,funk ,,wagnalls ,,company1 ,publishers1 ,new ,york 99 99 99 99 99 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ad page has been moved from the beginning to the end of the book4 ,minor typographical and punctuation errors have been corrected without note4 ,irregularities and inconsistencies in the text have been retained as printed4 ,mismatched quotes are not fixed if it's not sufficiently clear where the missing quote should be placed4 ,the cover for the e,book version of this book was created by the transcriber and is placed in the public domain4