,,immortal ,,youth      ,a ,study in the
 ,will to ,create       ,behold my most 
beautiful work3     the souls that ,i   
have sculptured4     ,these they cannot 
destroy4 ,let     the wood burn6 ,the   
soul is mine4           --,romain       
,rolland3 ,colas ,breugnon              
,,imprinted ,,mcmxix                    
,mc,g,r,a,t,h-,,sherrill ,,press        
,,graphic ,,arts ,,building     ,,boston
       ,,copyright ,,nineteen ,,nineteen
     ,,lucien ,,price          ,the     
first printing of this memoir is one    
thousand copies4         ,when these are
 gone1 those who wish more can obtain   
them from         ,mc,grath-,sherrill   
,press1 the publisher1 ,graphic ,arts   
,building1         ,boston1             
,massachusetts1 for one dollar a copy4  
,music      ,in the third act of        
,wagner's last music-drama there comes a
     flourish of muted horns1 remote1   
mysterious4 ,in it sounds the           
grandeur of that quest which never      
ends--the quest of the ,holy     ,grail4

 ,the phrase is repeated1 and over the  
flower-starred     meadow under the     
,april sun of ,good ,friday morning     
comes a knight     in dark armor1 his   
visor down1 carrying the holy spear4 ,it
 is     ,,parsifal4 ,his errand is the  
errand of aspiring youth in all         
lands and all ages4 ,i set that phrase  
of music1 compact with the     poetry   
and pain of idealism1 at the beginning  
of these pages in     token of the      
spiritual brotherhood4  ,illustration3  
,portrait of the artist by himself      
,,immortal ,,youth                      
,give me that man     ,that is not      
passion's slave1 and ,i will wear him   
,in my heart's core1 ay1 in my heart of 
heart1     ,as ,i do thee4              
--,,hamlet     ,i   ,there was a humble 
restaurant on ,charles ,street where    
cabmen and chauffeurs could be induced  
to tell the story of their lives over a 
combination-supper of lamb chop and two 
fried eggs costing 7that was in #aiab71 
with coffee and rolls1 twenty-five      

cents4 ,across the table one evening in 
the spring of that year sat a young man 
about twenty-four years old4 ,anyone    
would have taken a second look at him2  
also a third1 a fourth1 and as many more
 as good manners would permit4 ,what was
 there about him that attracted         
attention8 ,it was hard to say4 ,the    
dark eyes with a somber light burning in
 them8 ,the rugged features and swarthy 
complexion with a ruddy glow of health  
in each jowl8 ,the hands2 very large and
 finely muscled8 7,i have never seen a  
more beautiful pair of hands on a human 
being47 ,it was all of these things and 
none of them4 ,rather it was the look of
 one with immense forces in reserve1    
bound on an errand4  ,impossible to     
guess anything from his clothes3 dark   
suit1 shirt of gray flannel1 and black  
knitted tie4 ,chauffeur8 ,hardly4 ,well 
then1 what8 ,who8  7,this is no isolated
 personal impression4 ,wherever he went 
people felt the same intense curiosity  
about him4 ,sometimes they stared at him

 so that he asked me if his face was    
smudged47  ,was this stranger           
conversible8 ,he was4 ,presently he was 
speaking of the colonial doorways on    
,chestnut ,street with a discrimination 
which suggested the architect4 ,no4 ,it 
appeared that he was studying under ,mr4
 ,tarbell at the ,boston ,museum ,school
 of ,fine ,arts4 ,next1 that he came    
from ,pittsburgh4 ,here was a bond in   
common4 ,as two young ,middle           
,westerners we resented the social cold 
storage which ,new ,england imposes as a
 probationary period of acquaintance4   
,we condoled4 ,we fraternized4 ,we were 
as neighbors meeting in a foreign land4 
,at last somebody with whom it was safe 
to scrape acquaintance in the good      
old-fashioned ,middle ,western way      
without incurring suspicion of designs  
on one another's souls1 bodies1 or      
estates4  ,he climbed ,beacon ,hill with
 me to the house where ,i lived1        
carrying a paper bag which1 he explained
 modestly1 contained his breakfast3 two 

bananas and a shredded wheat biscuit4   
,the evening was mild4 ,windows stood   
open to the breeze which rumpled the    
leaves of an old linden where it spread 
its boughs in the brick-walled court4   
,he promptly took off his coat1         
displaying in the rays of a green-shaded
 student lamp a pair of forearms worthy 
of the hands which went with them4      
,summer and winter he wore his sleeves  
rolled above his elbows4 ,his wrists    
resented cuffs as wild creatures resent 
cages4 ,he stretched out his long legs  
on a cot which did duty by the fireplace
 as a sofa2 pushed his hair off his     
forehead with both hands1 fingers       
interlocked1 a trick he had2 and gave   
symptoms of feeling at home4  ,was he   
talkative8 ,not much6 ,never did clam   
yield shell to knife edge more gingerly4
 ,he would and he would not4 ,shy1      
reserved1 proud1 devoured with ambition1
 savagely determined1 a prey to some    
misgivings1 genuinely modest1 and       
anxious to talk it over with the right  

person1 but by no means sure who the    
right person was4  ,on sped the         
ambrosial hours of the spring evening4  
,bit by bit he revealed himself4 ,this  
was his third year in the ,museum       
,school4 ,he admired the technique of   
,mr4 ,tarbell and ,mr4 ,benson2 he      
prized their instruction4 ,but he       
distrusted their smoothness4 ,he missed 
vigor4 ,all round him he saw students   
neglecting their own creative bents to  
produce little ,bensons and little      
,tarbells4 ,already he had resolved to  
quit ,boston as soon as his student days
 were over4  ,i don't say ,i shall ever 
be able to paint as well as they can2   
but ,i must be myself1--not an imitation
 ,tarbell4  ,there had been two years in
 ,cornell before he came to ,boston4 ,he
 had rowed in his class eight on ,lake  
,cayuga4 ,hence that physical           
self-respect which betokens the young   
man accustomed unconcernedly to strip in
 a college boathouse or gymnasium4 ,but 
to eyes grown impatient with the college

 athlete's all too customary            
intellectual torpor and social          
complacency it was a holiday to find    
this well-made body1 tall1 broad in the 
shoulder1 narrow at hips1 lean and      
muscular1 housing also the brain of the 
thinker and the spirit of the pioneer4  
,for the astonishing thing was to find a
 young man of this type studying to be a
 portrait painter instead of a bond     
salesman4 ,it didn't sound ,yankee4 ,i  
said so4 ,that shot rang the bell4 ,he  
began to open up4  ,he was1 it appeared1
 of ,german extraction4 ,his            
grandfather1 who had wished to become an
 artist1 had come to ,america in a      
period when artists were about as much  
in request among us as concert pianists 
on a cattle ranch4 ,he had earned his   
living as an architectural sculptor4    
,the talent plunged1 like a river1      
underground for a generation2 then      
reappeared4 ,what happened when this    
little fellow's fingers began to itch   
for the pencil was easy to guess4 ,the  

father and grandfather put their heads  
together and resolved that he should    
have his chance4  ,it began to unravel4 
,now one understood the earnestness     
which seemed at first precocious--the   
seemingly cool indifference to the call 
of the world1 the flesh and the devil   
which usually troubles youngsters of    
twenty-four4 ,here was something more   
than ambition4 ,loyalty1 affection1     
gratitude1 and family pride4 ,this boy  
had more than talent4 ,he had character4
         99       99       99       99  
99  ,with this we are in the heart of   
the conflict between the artist and the 
trader3 between the will to create and  
the will to possess4 ,it is the central 
conflict of any age2 especially of this1
 and especially in ,america4 ,the young 
man comes to the forks of the road where
 he must decide whether he shall acquire
 or create2 whether he shall be a       
business man or a prophet4 ,he finds    
himself in a society which offers       
princely rewards to the commercial      

career and little but pains and         
penalties to those who would create4    
,this youngster was just learning his   
way around in the problem4 ,he recited1 
with comical irony1 the squalid         
platitudes which are chewed out at a    
youth bold enough to follow his creative
 bent3  ',is there any money in it8'    
',oh1 of course1 if you get to be a     
great painter4 ,but how do you know     
you've got it in you to be a great      
painter8 ,think you have8 ,got a pretty 
good opinion of yourself1 haven't you8' 
',what if you fail8 ,suppose you wake up
 some morning and find yourself a       
middle-aged man and a fizzle8 ,guess    
you'll wish then that you'd stuck to    
plain everyday business and dropped all 
this highfalutin about art4' ',yes4 ,i  
suppose it's an easy life3 sitting      
around and painting pictures4 ,pretty   
soft1 eh8 ,give me a man's job6' ',don't
 you think it's a little rash1 my boy1  
to risk so much1 when if you'd settle   
down to a good business you'd be sure of

 a decent living8 ,and what about       
marriage8 ,if you marry you'll have to  
paint pot boilers1 and then what becomes
 of your art8 ,you might as well be a   
business man and be done with it4 ,and  
if you don't1 is it worth going without 
a wife and children in order to paint   
pictures1 and so come at last to a      
lonely old age8'  ,he knew all the old  
ones by heart4 ,later we used to recite 
them together in concert like school    
children in the geography class4  ,if   
you took the roof off any ,chamber of   
,commerce you would find half a dozen   
retired business men whose guilty secret
 it is that they dabble on the quiet    
with paint tubes1 or modeling clay1 or  
scenarios1 or a violin--the poor1 damned
 souls of artists4 ,they have made their
 pile4 ,house and lot1 wife and         
children1 motor car and country         
club--all these they have2 and yet1     
gnawing at their hearts is the secret   
knowledge that they have missed the big 
thing4 ,they were born to beget children

 of the spirit2 they were born to create
 in art1 in music1 in literature1 in    
social experiment2 and the ignoble      
standards of the society in which they  
live have bludgeoned and ridiculed them 
into prostituting their highest powers  
in the market-place4  ,in such          
relationship did this young man stand to
 the life of his country and his time4  
,with unflinching eye he listened to its
 taunt3  ,artist1 create at your peril6 
,you may starve1 for all me1 until you  
win a reputation that is a commercial   
asset4 ,after which1 having despised    
you1 ,i will do my best to corrupt you  
by rewards and flatteries gratifying to 
my intellectual snobbery4  ,such were   
the terms4 ,this youth1 uncertain of his
 own powers1 accepted them with quiet   
courage and imperturbable good humor4   
,such was the secret of that look of    
settled purpose so intriguing on a face 
so young1 and such the secret of the    
fire which smouldered behind those dark 
eyes4 ,he was prepared for a siege4 ,he 

was ready to go to the mat4  ,it had    
taken three generations--son1 sire1 and 
grand-sire--to make this stand against  
the all-devouring maw of ,american      
commercialism3 three generations to     
conquer and produce an artist4 ,and     
mindful of his end ,i ask myself whether
 they did conquer4 ,we shall see4       
99       99       99       99       99  
,midnight clanked from the city clocks4 
,gosh6 said he1 is it as late as that8  
,he stood up and knocked the ashes out  
of his pipe against the red bricks of   
the hearth4 ,by the way1 ,i don't know  
your name4  ,i told him4  ,mine1 said   
he1 is ,fred ,demmler4  ,explaining that
 ,i already had a friend named ,fred ,i 
asked if he had any objection to being  
called ,fritz4  ,none whatever4  ,fritz 
it is1 then4  ,and ,fritz it remained4  
,,ii   ,a once-aristocratic residential 
street now reduced to a teaming         
thoroughfare2 pedestal to ,beacon ,hill2
 narrow1 ill-paved1 spattered with mud  
to the second story1 double row of tall 

brick town houses1 where ,thackeray and 
,dickens were once guests1 now          
placarding rooms to let2 assorted       
antique shops and restaurants1--the     
long1 unlovely street of ,in ,memoriam1 
yet with a certain wistful charm in its 
decayed gentility3 that is ,charles     
,street4  ,number #id maintained its    
rubber plant on console-table in dark   
vestibule4 ,there was a contraption1    
usually out of order1 by which you      
pulled a bell five times to save        
yourself the climb if the art colony in 
the fifth-floor-back did not answer the 
ring4 ,the young barbarians were usually
 out4  ,it was a colony of three3 ,ralph
 ,heard1 small1 slender1 fair1 escaped  
from a western military academy of which
 he could tell tales that froze the     
blood2 ,irving ,sisson1 a tall1 rangy   
,berkshire ,yankee1 dry and droll1 an   
,artemus ,ward turned art student       
7though known as ,siss it would never   
have occurred to anyone to call him     
,sissie1 and if anyone had been so rash1

 ,sisson's grim reply would have been1  
like the man in the yarn1 ,smile when   
you say that71 and ,fritz4  ,their room 
was a first act stage-set for an        
,american version of ,la ,boheme4 ,it   
was large1 low-ceiled1 and had one of   
those sepulchral white marble           
mantel-pieces of the black walnut       
period4 ,there was an iron bed and a    
cot1 a gaslight always out of kilter1 a 
writing-table strewn with pipes1        
unanswered letters1 tiny bottles of     
india ink1 drawing pens1 crayons1 thumb 
tacks1 jars holding bouquets of paint   
brushes1 and scurrilous caricatures of  
one another scrawled on scraps of white 
cardboard4 ,the place reeked with that  
heavenly odor of paint tubes4 ,by the   
window was a drawing board and          
portfolios4 ,canvases were stacked in a 
dark corner1 faces to the wall4  ,their 
windows looked into a deep courtyard    
formed by a triangle of tall brick      
houses1--the rears of houses on ,charles
 and ,brimmer ,streets1 the fronts of   

three quaint ,italianate red-brick      
dwellings1--all enclosing a tiny        
greensward on which slender poplars     
rustled their glossy leaves4 ,in the    
farthest corner of this court rise the  
walls and mullioned windows of the      
,church of the ,advent1 and on mild     
evenings when casements were open1 the  
thrush-like voices of the choir boys    
over the melodious thunder of great     
organ floated up to these windows4 ,but 
,i was never able to observe that it    
produced any pietistic tone in number   
#id4 ,on the contrary they affected to  
take a lively interest in the upper     
windows of the houses opposite and      
threatened to keep a pair of field      
glasses on their window sill4  ,as you  
go down ,pinckney ,street to the river  
you pass a break in the solid row of    
house fronts through which you can look 
up and see the two windows of that      
fifth-floor-back4 ,one always did look1 
and if they were lighted1 it was        
impossible not to go up2 for in that    

room there was always some form of what 
is technically known as trouble4 ,i     
never pass the spot now without looking 
up to see if there is a light in those  
windows4444 ,they are dark4         99  
99       99       99       99  ,on the  
walls of the room were two paintings by 
,fritz2 student works4 ,one was a small 
landscape sketch--smouldering red of a  
sunset after rain1 burning through      
ragged drab clouds over a hill country  
bathed in violet mists of twilight4 ,it 
was modest1 quiet4 ,there was a strain  
of thoughtful poetry in it4 ,but the    
striking part was its sincerity4 ,there 
was none of that striving after effect1 
that ambitious rhetoric which youngsters
 usually mistake for eloquence3 no      
attempt to make the scene anything more 
than what it was4 ,the other was a      
portrait study of a workman naked to the
 waist4 ,it was bold1 vigorous1         
masculine1 and overflowing with the joy 
of bodily health4  ,so far so good4 ,but
 something else was in store4  ,out of  

the canvases stacked against the wall he
 dug a study of a woman's head in       
profile4 ,one looked2 and then looked   
again4 ,who was she8 ,she had come to   
the school as a model for one week3 that
 was all they knew4 ,but her secret was 
on this canvas4 ,she must have been in  
her early thirties4 ,her face was quite 
serene4 ,it was the serenity of a place 
reduced to ashes4 ,utter resignation4   
,endure4 ,life has done its worst4  ,by 
what divination had this youngster of   
twenty-four guessed a secret like that8 
,from that moment it was clear to me    
that he was a portrait painter4  ,what1 
,i asked1 is that little star in the    
lower corner of the canvas8  ,that8 ,oh1
 he explained diffidently1 that is put  
on pictures which the school saves for  
its exhibition4     ,,iii   ,that golden
 ,spring6 ,clandestine dinners at an    
obscure ,french cafe in an obscure      
court1 where one went because1 though   
the food was something less than so-so1 
the sauces were exotic2 clandestine     

because1 behind closed shutters1 they   
served vin ordinaire without a license4 
,our parties1 to the disgust of         
,jacques1 were teetotal1 the real       
attraction being that the joint might be
 pinched any minute4  ,on ,may          
afternoons in the ,fenway1 disguised in 
a baseball suit of gray flannel1 ,fritz 
rejoiced as a strong man to swat the    
pill4 ,the pill swatted him one day1    
broke his thumb1 and in the end he had  
to have it rebroken and reset under     
ether4 ,his first words on coming to    
were3 ,give me my paint box4 ,all the   
nurses of his ward fell for him with a  
loud crash4 ,in all innocence he told   
what a lot of extra trouble they went to
 for him4 ,his friends smiled in their  
sleeves4  ,as often as there was a play 
of ,shaw or ,ibsen or ,galsworthy or    
,maeterlinck or ,shakespeare or ,synge  
there were expeditions to peanut heaven4
 ,knoblauch's ,kismet happened along and
 ,fritz appropriated the cry3 ,alms6 for
 the love of ,allah for occasions       

choicely inappropriate4  ,when a fine   
,may morning of blue and gold came      
winging over the city on the northwest  
wind he would get up extra early1 hustle
 through his shave and cold tubbing and 
join me in the tramp over ,beacon ,hill1
 across the ,common1 and down into      
,newspaper ,row for breakfast at the    
celebrated ,spa4 ,on the way up         
,chestnut ,street1 where the ,brahmin   
pundits live1 the favorite sport was to 
crack jokes at the expense of the       
sources of income which sustained these 
,georgian fronts and                    
mahogany-and-brocade interiors3 here1 a 
famous brand of ale2 there1 notorious   
industrial nose-grinding in ,fall ,river
 spinning mills--merry clank of dividend
 skeleton in genteel closet4444 ,on the 
,common1 jocund morning1 fresh green of 
turf and tree1 sweet breath of the      
earth2 sunshine1 bird-song1 youth1 444  
,spring6  ,and on a stool at the ,spa1  
,fritz's provoking grin and sly banter  
of a waitress who1 after a good look at 

him1 would conclude that if she was     
being kidded she liked it and was       
cheerfully ready for more4 ,after which 
breakfast he trudged the mile and a half
 to the ,art ,museum to see the morning 
and to save his father carfares4        
99       99       99       99       99  
,it appeared that he was a walker1 and  
not afraid of rain4 ,he proved it4 ,on a
 ,may evening brewing thunder we did a  
dissolving view out of the city on a    
train for ,cape ,ann4 ,at the end of the
 shore road around the ,cape awaited    
lodgings at an inn and a midnight       
supper4 ,at ,gloucester he was          
introduced to one of ,wonson's clam     
chowders and we set off at dusk4  ,that 
evening came the first inkling of his   
larger purpose--his higher than personal
 ambition3 what he would paint after his
 portraits assured him a livelihood4    
,something was said about ,pittsburgh   
and the mills4  ,they ought to be       
painted1 said he1 exactly as they are4  
,not sentimentalized like the magazine  

covers2 not made romantic1 as ,joseph   
,pennell has made them2 but painted in  
all their horror4 ,some day4 ,i don't   
know enough yet4  ,thunder had been     
muttering distantly4 ,the night had     
turned pitch black4 ,there were sullen  
flashes1 and drops began to patter4     
,would he be for turning back8 ,not he6 
,then the storm came crashing and       
pelting across the granite moors of the 
,cape4 ,gorgeous flashes which flushed  
the winding tidal inlets and the rocky  
hills a brilliant rose pink4 ,flash6    
,crash6 ,swish went the rain4 ,and the  
harder it stormed the better he liked   
it4 ,he strode along intoxicated with   
color and sound4  ,near ,annisquam is a 
double shade-row of willows overarching 
the road4 ,not far beyond1 yellow       
lamplight was streaming from the windows
 of a tiny cottage4 ,wading knee-deep in
 wet grass we knocked4  ,now it is a    
complicated process explaining to two   
aged ,new ,england spinsters on a lonely
 road at nine o'clock of a stormy night 

what your errand is1 especially when you
 haven't any4 ,they listened2 lifted the
 lamp on us for an                      
inspection--particularly on ,fritz2 one 
soon got used to seeing people inspect  
him furtively--and invited us in4       
,walkin' round the ,cape to ,rockport1  
be ye8 ,and in the rain8 ,for the fun of
 it6 ,well1 come in and set down4 ,i'd  
like to get a good look at someone who'd
 walk to ,rockport in the rain for the  
fun of it4 ,set down1 young gentlemen4  
,we set4 ,they were sisters4 ,one was   
small and timid3 she was of the sort    
that remain naive to the end4 ,the other
 was tall1 angular and sardonic1 with a 
mother wit smacking of the soil and the 
salt water4 ,she addressed herself to   
,fritz3  ,you ain't an escaped murderer1
 be ye8  ,fritz cackled lustily4  ,how  
do you know ,i'm not8 said he4  ,you    
look like that fella who's on trial in  
,boston now4 ,i see his pictures in the 
paper 444 and you come knockin' on the  
door at dead o' night in a thunder      

squall like in a story book4  ,would you
 say ,i looked like a murderer8 inquired
 ,fritz with relish4  ,you might look   
worse 'n him1 replied our free-speech   
hostess4 ,by his pictures he's a        
good-lookin' fella4 ,i says to ,saide   
whiles we was weedin' garden this       
morning1 't wouldn't be safe to let him 
go now1 for half the women in ,new      
,england are ready to fall in love with 
him--he's been that advertised4 ,she    
eyed us with her sardonic grin4 ,i      
looked at ,fritz4 ,he was blushing4  ,to
 her shrewd ,yankee wits we were clearly
 two lunatics1 but harmless2 and the    
object was to extract as much           
entertainment from us as the law        
allowed4 ,such was the tone of her      
farewell1 half an hour later4  ,if      
anyone asks who was here1 said she1     
,i'll tell them it was two young fellas 
walkin' to ,rockport in the rain for the
 fun of it4--,and then they'll think    
,i'm one6         99       99       99  
99       99  ,past midnight1 stumping   

dog-tired into the inn2 cold meat and   
bread1 ravenously devoured2 bed1 and the
 sleep of the just4  444 ,morning2 and  
such a morning as never was4 ,quite     
forgetting to dress1 ,fritz lost himself
 staring out of the open window at the  
quaint harbor1 the fishing fleet1 the   
blue bay and the gaunt headlands until  
it was suggested to him that passers by 
might be enjoying him as much as he was 
enjoying the morning4  ,there was an    
hour for soaking it in before the train 
left for the city1 and soak it in he    
did4 ,a sea of pale blue1 like molten   
glass1 untroubled by a breeze2 sky the  
deep blue of a morning after storms2 air
 sweet with the scent of blossoming     
orchards and dooryard lilacs and tart   
with the tang of salt brine2 merry      
twitter of robins2 lazy splash of surf2 
the long headlands tapering down to the 
sea2 the squat white tower of           
,straitsmouth light solitary on its     
rocky islet1 and overhead the lovely    
skies of ,may4  ,in the midst of it     

stood a young artist1 dumb with delight4
 ,his eyes drank4  ,oh brethren of the  
possessing class1 ye who must own this  
and that before you can enjoy1 this     
world can never give the bliss for which
 ye sigh4 ,that pilgrimage cost less    
than #c4jj per4         99       99     
99       99       99  ,evening4 ,above  
the tiny grass-plat and spindling       
poplars in ,mount ,vernon ,square floats
 the magic of a night in mid-,june4 ,the
 windows of the fifth-floor-back in #id 
,charles are lighted and open to the    
breeze4 ,from those of the ,advent come 
gusts of music1--rumbles of organ and   
the fresh voices of boys3 choir         
rehearsal4 ,but ,i think the sounds     
which float down from the windows of #id
 are more in tune with the night3 peal  
after peal of infectious laughter4 ,it  
was clear to the meanest order of       
intellect that ,sisson was telling      
stories which were more joyous than     
dutiful3 also that he had ,fritz going4 
,there was no mistaking that laugh4  ,a 

belated delivery man1 basket on arm1    
pauses beside me to listen and grin4  ,i
 bet that was a good one1 says he4 ,say1
 but can't that guy laugh6     ,,iv     
,in the autumn he reappeared bronzed and
 husky from a summer on a ,pennsylvania 
farm4 ,that spring had been the         
overture4 ,now the curtain rose4 ,how   
can my thin piano score reproduce that  
richly glowing orchestration8           
,gradually the artist in him unfolded4  
,it was like a process of nature--slow1 
silent1 sure4 ,in speech he was         
inarticulate4 ,the spoken word was not  
his trade2 he knew it1 and the knowledge
 made him self-conscious4 ,but give him 
a brush and he found tongue4 ,his       
silences were formidable4 ,the better to
 eat you with1 my dear6 ,nothing escaped
 him4 ,with a secret1 fierce impetuosity
 he was storing away impressions3       
glances1 gestures1 lines of faces1      
colors1 inflections of voices1          
landscapes1 phrases1 incidents1 ideas3  
he soaked them in like a thirsty sponge4

 ,everything was fish that came to his  
net4 ,what sometimes looked like an     
intellectual torpor was the boa         
constrictor digesting the zebra whole4  
,i doubt if he realized the tremendous  
vitality of his creative instinct4 ,he  
went about it as a wild creature roams  
the forest for its food3 it was a law of
 his being4 ,on tramping trips he would 
stalk miles in silence2 stopping stock  
still until he had taken in the         
scarlet-and-gold maple grove in a purple
 autumn mist2 or a mossy wood pile under
 pines2 or the rolling diversity of hill
 and woodland4 ,no apologies2 no        
explanations4 ,business4  ,it was soon  
clear that this young man knew exactly  
what he wanted and that he intended to  
get it4 ,there was a kind of animal     
sagacity about his mind which told it   
what food to accept and what to reject4 
,kuenstler1 says ,goethe1 rede nicht4   
,bilde6 7,artist1 don't talk4 ,create67 
,fritz lived this precept4 ,he would do 
first1 and then let the doing speak for 

itself4 ,when a young man is so         
determined to do something that he      
cannot be got to talk about it1 you may 
consider the thing as good as done4     
,here was a hungry mind1 seeking what it
 might devour and devouring it4 ,all    
that provender was being assimilated4   
,it could not evaporate in talk1 for    
,fritz was no talker4 ,it had to be     
expressed somehow and that somehow would
 have to be with a brush4444 ,oh1 he    
came and went disguised in the business 
suit of a young man dedicated to the    
career of buying in the cheapest market 
and selling in the dearest3 pleasant1   
friendly1 a prodigious eater1 a sound   
sleeper1 invincibly healthy1--and with  
only that silent intentness of eye to   
betray the secret of the creative power 
he carried within him4  ,but that winter
 it was surprised out of him4  ,fred    
,middleton1 then twenty-seven years old1
 six years out of ,harvard ,college1    
thoroughly conversant with the ethics of
 modern business1 was preparing to      

de-class himself and earn an honest     
living by manual labor on the land--a   
farmer1 and not a gentleman farmer4     
,with mock solemnity ,fritz was         
commissioned to do a portrait of ,fred4 
,the transaction was conducted on a     
basis of free agreement which would have
 satisfied even ,peter ,kropotkin4 ,the 
painter was to do it any way he         
chose--absolute free speech4 ,the sitter
 was to choose any clothes he liked1 to 
sit till he was tired1 and stretch when 
he pleased4 ,the purchaser was to pay   
what he was able4 ,so everybody was     
happy1 being free4  ,in the third floor 
back on ,pinckney ,street 7it had north 
light7 decks were cleared for action3   
two rickety orange boxes covered with a 
steamer rug did duty as a dais4 ,with   
paint box1 easel and palette ,fritz came
 down from ,exeter where he had just    
finished a portrait of an old lady4     
,there was a glowing fire in the grate2 
a bluster of ,march winds in the brick  
court2 the roar of blast through the    

antlers of the old linden2 waning light 
of ,saturday and ,sunday afternoons2    
pages of ,nietzsche's epigrams and of   
,jean-,christophe read aloud2 pauses to 
rest and consult4  ,fritz always noticed
 people's hands4 ,he found almost as    
much character in them as in faces4 ,he 
admired the hands in ,rodin's work1     
especially that of the sculptor in his  
,pygmalion3--the tenderness of that     
hand6 he said4 ,fred's large hands      
interested him4 ,the right one he caught
 hot off the bat4 ,the left caused him  
no end of trouble4 ,finally one day he  
threw down his brush and exclaimed3     
,i've watched that left hand come down  
to rest on that leg a dozen times4 ,i've
 tried everything else and now ,i'm     
going to paint it exactly as it is4     
,after all1 it is a hand4  ,thank you2  
thank you6 replied ,fred1 bowing        
suavely4 ,people usually refer to it as 
a ham4 ,a photographer once told me that
 ,i had a mitt like an elephant's hoof4 
99       99       99       99       99  

,and ,fritz painted4 ,and the secret was
 out4 ,it came out in two installments3 
the first1 when he was spreading on     
canvas a life history of ,fred          
,middleton compressed into terms of a   
rugged face and two large hands2 the    
second came three years later4 ,fred had
 remarked1 after one of his sittings1   
that it was all he could do to keep his 
face straight at some of the grimaces   
,fritz made while painting4 ,the        
precaution was needless4 ,if he had     
laughed outright it is doubtful if      
,fritz would have noticed it4  ,most of 
the time while he was painting the      
portrait of me1 three years later1 ,i   
was absorbed in my own work and paid no 
attention to him4 ,but one afternoon    
when my wheels refused to grind ,i took 
a holiday and watched him out of the    
tail of my eye4444  ,it was as if some  
one you supposed you knew all about had 
removed a set of false whiskers and     
spoken in his natural voice4 ,was this  
our shy1 silent ,fritz8 ,why1 the       

impudence of him6 ,the shameless way he 
peered into the secret places of a face6
 ,see here1 young gentleman1 who gave   
you permission to rummage through that  
trunkful of old letters8  ,here at last 
was ,fritz1 on his native heath1 naked  
and unashamed1 talking his own language 
and1 confident of its not being         
understood1 indulging in the most       
appalling candor4  ,what's sauce for the
 goose is sauce for the gander4 ,while  
he pried into my secrets ,i pried into  
his4 ,i amused myself by painting a     
portrait of ,fritz painting4 ,some day  
,i meant to show it to him4444 ,but here
 it is3  ,he may not be able to talk    
with his tongue4 ,but give him his      
brushes and his whole body talks4 ,no   
gymnastics3 but his whole being aquiver4
 ,silent1 but his arms1 fingers1 head1  
shoulders make animated dumb show4 ,he  
is conversing delightedly with himself  
over his work4 ,he has forgotten time   
and place4 ,intense mental              
concentration1 and nervous energy4 ,he  

squints1 grimaces1 stoops and looks at  
his canvas wrong-side up4 ,he sets his  
teeth1 compresses lips1 squares his     
shoulders1--lost in his work4 ,he mixes 
colors with minute particularity4       
,sometimes he dabs with a tiny brush1 a 
peek here1 a peck there1 like a dainty  
bird4 ,again he paints in sweeping      
flourishes1 beating a kind of rapturous 
rhythm with his brush1 gesturing with it
 between strokes1 like an orchestral    
conductor hewing out the rhythms of a   
symphony4444 ,he pauses2 he hangs limp  
over his palette1 considering4444 ,or he
 gives a joyous little bounce in his    
chair as the decision comes4 ,his hands 
and forearms1 strong and supple1 talk in
 every sinew4 ,fingers mobile1          
infinitely expressive3 they thumb the   
brush2 turn its handle in a ruminating  
pause2 reflect a sudden resolution in   
the stiffening of tendons4444  ,and     
above all this quiet animation and      
silent dexterity is the regnant1 gallant
 head with dark eyes flashing mastery2  

the mouth set with purpose2 the thick   
mass of shining black hair breaking into
 a wave as it falls away from the clear 
forehead--and all in complete           
self-forgetfulness1 the oblivion of the 
artist rapt in the joy of creating4  ,it
 was quite simple4 ,here was a soul     
which dwelt in a prison of shyness4     
,painting unlocked the door4 ,out it    
rushed4 ,free4 ,it could be itself at   
last4 ,no fears2 no concealments4       
,liberty6  ,that was all very well for  
,fritz1 but how about his sitter8 ,about
 the time the sitter sensed what was    
going on he felt moved to exclaim3      
,just a moment1 ,fritz4 ,don't you think
 you are getting a trifle familiar8  ,i 
heard one of his painter friends1 eyeing
 a canvas which ,fritz had just         
finished1 mutter1  ,there is some       
marvelous subtlety about that mind4     
,already his knack of guessing people   
was damnable4 ,he played no favorites4  
,i am going to paint what ,i see or ,i  
am not going to paint at all4 ,if what  

he saw was fatuous1 he told it with the 
disconcerting gusto of a child2 if it   
was sad1 he told it 7as in that student 
portrait7 so as to produce a burning    
pressure behind the eyelids2 if it was  
strong and gentle1 he told it 7as in the
 portrait of the young farmer7 so as to 
kindle respect and affection4 ,often all
 this was unconscious4 ,again he knew   
exactly what he was doing and took a    
wicked relish in it4 ,of some wealthies 
whom he was painting he confided with a 
grin3  ,of course they patronize me     
within an inch of my life1 but ,i       
sometimes wonder what would happen if   
they knew4444  ,perhaps he was not so   
unsophisticated as advertised in the    
catalogue4 ,he helped himself pretty    
generously out of the popular           
supposition that an artist is a mild    
form of lunatic4 ,he made good use of   
his talent for silence4 ,but what ears  
and eyes6 ,nobody who had seen him paint
 could ever feel quite safe with him    
again4     ,v   ,it happened that       

,alexander ,james was studying at the   
,museum ,school4 ,that the son of the   
psychologist who made psychology read   
like a novel and the nephew of the      
novelist who made a novel read like     
psychology should have identified       
,fritz's talent the first crack out of  
the box was about the least surprising  
thing in the world4 ,the two young      
painters proceeded to form an offensive 
and defensive alliance4 ,where one was1 
there was the other also2 on the        
baseball field1 on painting expeditions1
 on pilgrimages in early spring into    
,new ,hampshire to climb ,chocorua1 and 
on occasional voyages into the land of  
pretty girls4 ,it was good to see the   
pair together3 two thoroughbreds4 ,both 
athletes1 both artists1 one dark1 the   
other fair1 both about the same height  
and build4 ,people would turn to look   
after them as they passed with an       
expression of ,wonder who they are4     
,somebody out of the ordinary4          
,alexander was wont to disguise his     

frank admiration of ,fritz behind a     
smoke screen of banter4 ,this ,fritz    
would suffer with an amused grin and the
 massive calm of a mastiff1 for he had  
no such arsenal of repartee as this     
young gentleman from the household of a 
,harvard professor2 but once in a while 
he would land a retort so neat as to set
 ,alexander spinning4 ,it did not take  
the ,cambridge youth long to discover   
the use ,fritz made of his talent for   
silence and it was his delight to give  
him away in his game of holding his     
tongue the better to use his eyes1--as  
,alexander said3 the wise old ,bruin6   
99       99       99       99       99  
,in ,massachusetts the anniversary of   
the battle of ,lexington1 ,april #ai1 is
 a holiday4 ,it was #aiac4 ,in the      
parlor of an inn whose windows look     
northward across the snug haven of      
,rockport to the surf-scoured ledges of 
,pigeon ,cove ,i was seated at a piano1 
back to the door1 painfully dissecting a
 score of ,tristan4  ,the door opened   

and a voice exclaimed1 ,good ,lord6  ,it
 was ,fritz4 ,with him was ,alexander   
,james4 ,both were half ossified with   
the chill of the mid-,april afternoon1  
for they had been painting on the shore 
down towards ,straitsmouth4  ,general   
astonishment4 ,the two expeditions had  
originated quite independently4 ,it was 
whimsically like those momentous chance 
encounters in picturesque spots which   
abound in the novels of ,alexander's    
uncle ,henry2 but the novelist1 be it   
noted1 doesn't always save these        
coincidences from a slightly fishy sound
 which was totally wanting in this4     
,they thawed themselves out and         
exhibited their sketches4 ,fritz had1 as
 usual1 gone after it and got it--a     
spirited bit3 druidical heaps of pink   
granite boulders against dashing surf3  
dazzling white of foam-crest on deep    
blue4  ,there was a jolly supper in the 
brown-walled dining room 7it had been   
the kitchen of an eighteenth century    
farm house7 which the last rays of the  

spring sun flooded with red golden      
light2 the two painters comparing notes 
on the exhibitions of the ,scandinavians
 and the ,ten ,americans4  ,they        
departed for a home-talent play at a    
local hall in a frame of mind which     
boded no good for the performance4444   
,about eleven o'clock they breezed in   
with the announcement that there was a  
,northwest wind 7the ,new ,england wind 
which sweeps the sky cloudless blue71 a 
full moon and a dashing sea2 and that to
 go to bed was a crime4 ,away1 then1 for
 ,land's ,end1 along shore paths at the 
edge of grassy cliffs1 by bushy lanes1  
over meadows1 moors1 popple beaches and 
brooks1 across the moon-blanched land   
beside the moon-burnished sea4          
,straitsmouth ,light burned a yellow    
spark4 ,the twin lights on ,thatcher's  
,island shone weird blue in their tall  
towers4 ,low on the rim of sky and sea  
hung gigantic masses of cloud whitened  
by the bluish pallor of the moon4 ,in   
the marsh bottoms frogs cheeped their   

shrill sweet song of spring3 the        
northwester bellowed through the willow 
twigs 444 mournful pour of surf 444     
splendor of spring moon 444 the lonely  
moor 444 the steadfast light-house      
flames 444 the white walls and gray     
roofs of the sleeping town4444  ,at one 
in the morning1 tip-toeing into the     
dining room1 we devoured a plate of     
bread and butter left for late comers4  
,both of them were too genuine artists  
to comment on what we had seen4         
99       99       99       99       99  
,it is a lovely afternoon of ,june1     
#aiad1 at the pier of the ,allan ,line  
steamships in ,charlestown4 ,the ship is
 the old ,nubian1 safe and slow1 saloon 
upholstered in plush of maple sugar     
brown1 brass oil lamps swinging in      
gimbles as befitted a smart packet of   
the late #hj's4 ,boston to ,glasgow4    
,scotland swarmed the wharf4  ,mixed in 
was an artists' colony4 ,for that was   
the great day4 ,fritz and ,alexander    
were sailing for a year's study abroad3 

,london1 ,paris1 ,munich4 ,the gang     
which came to see them off were dramatis
 personae of ,act ,,ii of ,la ,boheme3  
four painters1 an interior decorator1 an
 illustrator assorted scribblers1 and a 
,scottish chieftain 7lord of an ancient 
clan1 hero of a hundred                 
skin-of-your-teeth escapes1 veteran of  
,polish revolutionary escapades1        
uncrowned king of an ,african tribe3 as 
raconteur he had his rival1 ,robert     
,louis ,stevenson1 lashed to the bed74  
,this day he strode resplendent in plaid
 knee socks1 plaid kilt1 a murderous    
,hieland dirk swung at his hip1 short   
jacket the breast of which blazed with  
medals1 and long black locks caught up  
under a cap4 ,as he crossed the wharf   
planking at a stride like deer-stalking 
over his native crags1 the rest of us   
half expected the assembled ,scots to   
prostrate themselves and knock foreheads
 on flooring in fealty4 ,he did excite  
some attention4 ,sisson said--well1 no  
matter what ,sisson said4#a  #a ,after  

all1 why not8 ,some one was explaining  
that the chief 7who was a genuinely fine
 fellow7 had come to ,america to raise  
funds for his clan4 ,sisson said3 ,he'll
 he lucky if he gets back to ,scotland  
with his kilt4  ,it was a great         
occasion4 ,fritz1 his black eyes        
snapping with excitement1 came up the   
gang plank from deck to wharf to be     
pounced on by a jolly crew4 ,he was     
outwardly cool1 but his engines were    
racing4 ,after him came ,alexander      
,james4 ,pounce number two4 ,showers of 
rice clattered on a bridal pair close   
by1 but their festival was tame compared
 to this4 ,to meet ,henry ,james and    
,john ,sargent in ,london3 to study in  
,paris and ,munich3 to see the great    
galleries4 ,they were embarking on      
greater seas than the ,atlantic4 ,this  
was the great day1 the great hour1 and  
with a troop of friends rejoicing in    
their good fortune to sweeten it4444    
,away to the land of heart's desire4444 
,romance4444 ,bohemia4444 ,europe4      

,o ,youth1 and the days that were6      
,from the caplog at the pier head as the
 ,nubian swung into midstream of the    
,charles1 the band of pariahs bawled    
ribald farewells and wrung out          
handkerchiefs in mock tears4 ,alexander 
,james1 the ,clive ,newcome of the      
adventure1 leaned on the teakwood rail1 
waving his straw hat2 and ,fritz1 the   
,j4,j4 of the story1 sat on the lowest  
ratline of the shrouds1 feet on rail1   
pretending to weep into his hat and then
 emptying the brine into the brine4     
,the ship's side1 black hull and white  
upperworks1 took a burnishing from the  
late afternoon sun4 ,under the gaiety   
there was a queer feeling4 ,there1      
divided from us by a hundred yards of   
harbor water1 were the two friends with 
whom we had just shaken hands1 and the  
strip between was widening1 would widen 
to an ocean4 ,they stood out amid the   
throng of passengers as distinct as     
though they had been the only souls     
aboard4 ,they waved3 we waved4 ,as the  

vessel straightened away in her course  
they imitated our several gestures to   
signify personal farewells3 it was      
thought and done impromptu4 ,and long   
after their figures grew indistinct as  
the ship lessened down the harbor lane  
between elbowing wharves and the piled  
masses of city towers and spires1 there 
were gleams of two white straw hats     
which we knew4444  ,all the same1 it was
 a trifle too much like a dress         
rehearsal for death4         99       99
       99       99       99  ,then1 in  
less than six weeks1 a world in tumult4 
,continental ateliers were emptying     
their students on the battlefield4      
,fritz1 who was in ,england1 prudently  
kept out of the rush homeward and made  
the most of his few weeks4  ,he was in  
,downing ,street in front of that dingy 
,georgian facade the night the ,british 
,cabinet sat waiting for ,germany's     
reply to their ultimatum4  ,it gave one 
an odd feeling1 said he1 to realize that
 behind those drawn shades sat men who  

were settling the question of life or   
death for hundreds of thousands of their
 fellow creatures4 ,the crowd cheered4  
,i did not4  ,of ,henry ,james he saw   
comparatively little1 for the novelist  
was in poor health1 but he was immensely
 stimulated by the little he did see1   
for beginning with ,roderick ,hudson he 
had been quick to discover how much this
 master of style had to teach a painter 
of what he had himself learned from     
painters4  ,there was a memorable       
session with ,mr4 ,sargent in his       
,london studio4 ,mr4 ,sargent happened  
just then to be doing a portrait of     
,lord ,curzon1 and ,fritz related with  
wicked glee 7imitating ,mr4 ,sargent as 
he backed away from his easel7 how the  
painter had remarked3  ,i have not made 
up my mind how to finish it4 ,if ,i     
can't get enough interest out of the    
face1 ,i'll put a scarlet coat on him4  
99       99       99       99       99  
,it was late in ,october before he      
sailed for home1 as one of a handful of 

passengers on a freighter4 ,the voyage  
was one of continuous foul weather      
which1 to the mystification of the      
others1 was vastly to the delight of    
,fritz4 ,he lived on deck1 begrudging   
time to sleep4 ,he fraternized with the 
crew4 ,one day of thin drizzle and      
greasy swells1 getting into old togs1 he
 helped the deck-hands greatly to their 
satisfaction and somewhat to the scandal
 of the other passengers1 shovel coal   
down a hatch4  ,they didn't think ,i'd  
stick it through1 said he4  ,after that 
he was one of them4     ,,vi   ,he had  
chosen to live in ,pittsburgh1 partly   
because it was his home and partly      
because it promised him more elbow room4
  ,i want to paint1 said he1 and ,i do  
not want to have to play social politics
 in order to get commissions1 as ,i am  
afraid ,i would have to do in ,boston4  
,besides1 in ,pittsburgh1 there are     
fewer painters to influence me4 ,i stand
 more chance of being myself4           
,alexander ,james said it was brutal of 

,fritz to go away to ,pittsburgh4 ,the  
rest of the colony agreed4 ,but it      
became ,fritz's delight to swoop down on
 us in ,boston unannounced4  444 ,it is 
late in a wild night of mid-winter1 a   
furious gale of wind and snow whipping  
across the gables and chimney stacks of 
,beacon ,hill3 a night for tucking      
oneself up in a wing chair beside a fire
 with a book and reading lamp1 roar of  
storm in ears4444  ,a rap sounds on the 
door4  ,come6  ,the rap is repeated4    
,come in6  ,the door opens and framed in
 its blackness stands ,fritz4  ,with him
 is ,ralph ,heard in a state of         
jubilation4  ,you remember1 says he1 ,i 
told you only two days ago that ,i sort 
of had a hunch that ,fritz might be     
dropping in on us most any time now8    
,well1 to-night ,i was sitting at my    
writing-table1 when the door opened with
 a bang4 ,i thought1 without looking    
around1 ',that is the way ,fritz opens a
 door4' ,and there was ,fritz4  ,his one
 emotional luxury was this enjoyment of 

watching his friends fall all over their
 own feet in the glad surprise of seeing
 him4  ,he was on his way to paint some 
portraits of ,exeter schoolmasters4 ,it 
was slowly wormed out of him that       
romance had visited his shores4 ,a ,st4 
,louis woman was motoring to ,new ,york4
 ,in a street of ,pittsburgh a tire blew
 out4 ,as it was raining1 she got out of
 the car and went into an art store in  
front of which it had stopped1 to wait  
for repairs4 ,her errand in ,new ,york  
was to choose a portrait painter4 ,in   
the art store a portrait by ,fritz was  
on exhibition4 ,she decided that there  
was no need of going on to ,new ,york4  
,that evening ,fritz was called to her  
hotel4 ,it ended by his going on to ,st4
 ,louis and painting portraits of the   
whole family4  ,what his                
bread-and-butter problems were ,i never 
fully knew4 ,i think they were more in  
what he faced than in what he had to    
encounter4 ,within two or three years   
after he left the ,museum ,school1 he   

was paying his own way4 ,he lived with  
the utmost frugality4 ,his studio was a 
workshop3 four walls and a north light4 
,i keep it bare on purpose1 he confided1
 to frighten away loafers4  ,it appeared
 that certain amiable slayers of their  
own and others' time1 envisaging a      
studio of divans1 ,russian cigarettes1  
tea and twaddle1 paid one visit1 and    
only one4  ,his attitude toward money   
was an island of sanity in a lunatic    
ocean4 ,it was no time before he sensed 
the absurdity of attempting to measure  
creative work by commercial values1 and 
that is1 of course1 the avenue by which 
the artist-thinker divines the idiotic  
husbandry of organizing society to      
batten those who distribute and those   
who own by penalizing those who produce 
and those who create4 ,money he viewed  
as an article neither to be spent nor to
 be hoarded1 but rather to be reinvested
 where it would draw intellectual       
dividends4 ,his one extravagance was to 
buy his mind the food it needed if he   

had the wherewithal to pay for it4 ,and1
 as ,erasmus remarks1 after that1 some  
clothes4 ,the same independence which   
had fortified him against those who had 
once pointed him out as a crack-brained 
youngster with the presumption to       
suppose he could be a great artist      
sustained him now when he was pointed   
out as a promising portrait painter who 
was already getting good money for his  
work4  ,finding himself1 as he did1     
endowed with a creative purpose         
considerably at odds with the structure 
of the society around him2 put to it1 as
 he was1 to protect that fledgling from 
the well-intentioned but fatal meddlings
 of the mediocre1 not a shadow of       
ill-humor did he allow to cross his     
average human intercourse4 ,he made me  
think of a wise old cat who1 having     
carefully hidden her kittens in the     
hayloft1 presents a tolerant frame to   
the cuffs and caresses of the children4 
,by the beginning of #aiaf it was clear 
to anyone who knew him that all he      

needed to reach the summit was to keep  
climbing1 and this he appeared          
abundantly able and determined to do4   
,,vii   ,he was growing up4 ,shy he     
would always be1 but in place of his    
boyish self-distrust had come a quiet   
confidence in his own powers4 ,his mind 
was on the watch for its food1 like an  
eagle ready to pounce4 ,there was an    
eager1 vigilant look in his eyes when   
one spoke of certain books unknown to   
him3 he was questioning whether they    
would be what he wanted4 ,he would pump 
me about the content of certain authors4
 ,i could see him accepting and         
rejecting4 ,he read the poets as one    
quarrying marble for architectural      
designs of his own4 ,his hungry reading 
was as different from that of the       
perfunctory college student as the      
oarsmanship of a dory fisherman on the  
,grand ,banks is from that of an        
eight-oared crew on the placid ,charles3
 the producer as contrasted with the    
consumer4  ,george ,meredith and ,walt  

,whitman became two of his great        
companions4 ,once he told me that he was
 reading everything of ,thomas ,hardy he
 could lay his hands on4  ,why8 ,i      
asked4  ,he knows how to set the human  
figure against vast backgrounds of      
,nature3 figures outlined half against a
 heath and half against sky4  ,i wonder 
if ,romain ,rolland realizes the        
intimacy of the friendship which has    
sprung up between ,jean-,christophe and 
the youth of to-day4 ,fritz and         
,christophe took an amazing shine to    
each other from the start4 ,it was      
,christophe who led ,fritz to read      
everything else of ,romain ,rolland he  
could find1 and thus his steps were     
guided to the summit of that ,mount of  
,vision1 ,rolland's ,life of ,tolstoy1  
whence he looked far and wide into the  
stern grandeur of that moral wilderness 
unsubdued by man through which the      
heroic thinker and prophet pushes on    
alone4444 ,to look is to follow4 ,he    
began to devour ,tolstoy's works4 ,the  

,kreutzer ,sonata he sat up half the    
night beside my fire to finish4 ,waking 
towards morning ,i saw him scowling over
 it4 ,he asked to take the book away    
with him4 ,soon he was up to his neck in
 the dramatists3 ,ibsen1 ,strindberg1   
,brieux1 ,sudermann1 ,galsworthy1       
,synge1 ,shaw4  ,there was a performance
 of ,candida with ,mr4 ,milton ,rosmer  
as the poet4 ,they say that a secret can
 be told only to him who knows it       
already4 ,there is a secret in two      
tremendous speeches at the close of that
 play which 7as the dramatist himself   
says7 few but poets know3               
,,morell3 7alarmed7 ,candida3 don't let 
him do anything rash4       ,,candida3  
7confident1 smiling at ,eugene7 ,oh1    
there is no fear4      ,he has learnt to
 live without happiness4                
,,marchbanks3 ,i no longer desire       
happiness3 life is nobler than          
that4 ,parson ,james1 ,i give you my    
happiness with both hands4  ,those lines
 stung ,fritz as the whip stings a      

mettled horse4 ,his flesh rebelled1 but 
the poet in him leaped to the truth4    
,on ,march #bj1 #aiac1 the colony at #id
 ,charles ,street adjourned to a        
performance of ,man and ,superman4      
,fritz kept his room-mate up until two  
in the morning discussing it4 ,the next 
night he routed me out of bed at ten and
 quizzed me about it until three in the 
morning4  ,he had had his glimpse of the
 collision between sex and ambition2    
between the impulse of the woman to     
create children of flesh and blood1 with
 the man as adjunct and provider2 and   
the impulse of the man to create        
children of the spirit independently of 
the woman4 ,he was quick to realize that
 he had struck something which he had to
 settle1 and he was settling it4 ,the   
thing was deliciously transparent4 ,here
 was a young gentleman tremendously in  
earnest about being an artist4 ,being an
 artist he loved beauty4 ,hitherto1 in  
his shy way1 he had secretly been rather
 tickled by the flutter which his       

striking head created in the dove cots  
of pretty girls4 ,but after ,march #bj1 
#aiac1 the tune changed4 ,he was        
affable1 delighted to make their        
acquaintance--but on his guard4 ,he had 
not the slightest intention of letting  
sex thwart his ambition4  ,yes1 but4448 
,yes1 but4444 ,he played the game4 ,a   
commercial society decrees that the     
artist cannot have a livelihood until   
his work is accepted at a commercial    
value4 ,pending that acceptance1 if he  
assumes the responsibility of wife and  
children he also assumes the risk of    
shackling himself to pot-boiling work   
for life4  ,society also decrees a      
standard of prenuptial chastity for the 
male4 ,suppose the male happens to be   
more interested in art than in          
domesticity4 ,he must then ask himself  
whether he shall abide by a decree which
 bourgeois society promulgates with more
 emphasis than sincerity4 ,with his eyes
 wide open to the fact that the very    
society which promulgates this decree   

openly winks at its evasion1 ,fritz     
abode by it4 ,a slightly sterner set to 
his jaw2 a slightly darker flash in his 
eye2 a slightly grimmer stoicism in the 
grip on his emotions were all that      
betrayed the battle which had raged in  
him between the two creative forces3 sex
 and intellect4 ,he never pretended that
 the battle was won for keeps4 ,the     
crust on which he walked he knew to be  
thin4 ,but it was won for the present4  
,he well knew that there are no bargain 
days at life's counter3 he had come     
there to purchase one of the most       
precious commodities--a creative        
career--and he was willing to pay the   
fee4 ,if he found the fee somewhat high 
7and ,i have reason to know that he did7
 he never complained4 ,it was his reward
 to enjoy that supreme luxury of        
conduct--to be the thing he seemed4 ,he 
lived in that kind of glass house which 
is not damaged by any amount of         
stone-throwing1 because there is nothing
 to hit3 a glass house with all the     

curtains up4 ,naked and unashamed could 
have been written over the door of his  
mind4 ,time and again he quoted a       
passage from ,trilby in which ,du       
,maurier says that mental chastity      
begins in the artist when the model     
drops her last garment4 ,he was frank to
 add that this was strictly true2 that  
in the intense concentration of his mind
 on problems of form and color he had   
found in painting from the nude no room 
for images of sex but on the contrary an
 actual release from the heats and      
fevers which plague young men4 ,the     
remedy he proposed was3 ,get rid of     
mystery4  ,there is a portrait painted  
at about this time which tells the story
 of the inner struggle which he was     
fighting and winning4 ,it is of a young 
girl1 about his own age1 with a         
wondrously sweet expression and         
sparkling eyes4 ,the delicacy1 the      
spirituality which shines through it    
makes it hard to believe that the       
portrait could have been painted by a   

young man4 ,not a hint of sexuality4 ,he
 later told me that the girl was        
afflicted with a lameness and he told   
how grateful he was to her for valuing  
him for his mind and not obtruding sex4 
,i doubt if he knew how publicly yet    
with what delicacy he had thanked her4  
,there were moods of him1 as when he    
stood silently drinking in a landscape1 
which made me think of that fine old    
chant which one hears in the churches3  
,o worship the ,lord in the beauty of   
holiness4         99       99       99  
99       99  ,in the emptiness left by  
his death ,i came to realize that one of
 the principal anticipations of my life 
had been looking forward to watch1 year 
by year1 the unfolding of his mind and  
the ripening of his powers4 ,his talent 
had long since passed the stage at which
 it was a sporting proposition--the     
stage at which one could chaff him about
 cashing in heavily some day on a pair  
of early ,demmlers4  ,there was no kind 
of doubt that he carried within him the 

creative daimon4 ,his very instincts    
betrayed it4 ,he went at a landscape the
 way ,hugo ,wolf went at a song3 he     
lived with the poem before creating the 
music4 ,for the first few days in a     
novel countryside he never thought of   
touching brush to canvas4 ,he walked    
around in the scene1 his every sense    
alert to its feature and color1 to its  
sound and smell4 ,he laid in wait for   
its moods4 ,he eyed it in every         
circumstance of wind and weather1 as if 
it had been a face he was preparing to  
paint1 or a woman he was preparing to   
wed4 ,no words4 ,the quality he most    
appreciated in a companion at such times
 was silence4 ,and it was entertainment 
enough to watch the play of expression  
in his face as his eyes roamed meadow1  
hill or sea horizon--vigilance1 delight1
 eagerness1 discriminating study1       
instructions to memory1 brooding        
thought--his life was a perpetual       
honeymoon with nature for his bride4    
,then would come the day and the hour   

when he was ready to paint4 ,by that    
time1 in the wealth of his materials1   
his only study would be not what to put 
in but what to leave out4 ,i doubt if he
 had reached the point of knowingly     
causing his subconscious to work for    
him1 but it will be apparent from the   
foregoing that he was doing so          
unconsciously4  ,he was able1 somehow1  
to communicate his sense of form and    
color to another1 without resort to     
speech1 or with only the fewest words4  
,perhaps it was the stimulus of seeing  
how much there was for him in the       
distant shining of sunlight on winding  
waters1 or a range of low hills         
scrawling their signature on the chill  
blue of horizon sky1 which taught others
 to find the wonder and dignity in what 
they would once have looked on as       
commonplace4 ,at any rate1 ,i find      
myself1 in all seasons1 seeing          
landscapes through his eyes4444 ,now    
that looks commonplace1 but it isn't4   
,fritz would have seen something in     

these somber ,march-brown meadows       
drowned in the freshets of spring2 these
 red-budding birches2 this delicate     
flush of pink in a drab evening sky4444 
,and so he1 being dead1 yet seeth4  ,he 
was well aware1 by this time1 that the  
artist who is not also a thinker is a   
one-legged man4 ,he accepted the        
obligation of understanding matters     
which1 superficially1 might have seemed 
far outside his province4 ,it was in    
#aiae that he encountered ,tolstoy's    
great work on ,christian anarchism1 ,the
 ,kingdom of ,god ,is ,within ,you4 ,it 
revolutionized his view of life4 ,it    
convinced him of the futility of        
violence as a method of settling        
disputes1 personal or national4 ,and the
 shock of having to transvalue all the  
accepted values1 of having1 in a world  
organized on the basis of fear1 to      
conceive of a world organized on the    
basis of good will1 made him a thinker  
in his own right4  ,next he encountered 
,romain ,rolland's ,life of ,michael    

,angelo4 ,far from being chilled by the 
classic austerity of that work1 it      
warmed him4 ,in it he found the food he 
had been seeking4 ,he made it a part of 
him4 ,it confirmed1 with revelations of 
the laws of mental conduct which        
governed that giant of the ,renaissance1
 principles which this young man had    
been formulating and practising by the  
naked instinct of his will to create4   
,things which he had been doing or      
forbearing to do1 he could not have told
 you why1 here received their sanction  
or veto in the experience of a genius4  
,little as was said about this between  
us1 it was easy to see how profoundly   
this discovery of the similarity between
 his own mental processes and those of a
 great master had strengthened his      
confidence in himself4 ,michael ,angelo 
was added to the list of his ,great     
,companions4  ,he had another4          
,rembrandt4  ,there was a gallery in    
,london1 which one ,i forget1 which he  
visited day after day4  ,in the first   

room you entered1 said he1 was a        
portrait of an old woman by ,rembrandt1 
painted in his last period4 ,time after 
time ,i went there intending to see the 
rest of the gallery4 ,sometimes ,i even 
tried a room or two4 ,what was the use8 
,i went back to that portrait4 ,it      
seemed like a waste of time to look at  
the other pictures4 ,everything they    
said--if they said anything--was said in
 that portrait by ,rembrandt and said   
better4 ,it seemed to me as if the whole
 history of humanity were concentrated  
in that old woman's face4444 ,finally ,i
 surrendered and went only to see that4 
99       99       99       99       99  
,there is a chastity of the mind1 just  
as there is a chastity of the body4     
,there are certain creative processes   
which a sincere thinker would no more   
reveal to casual eyes than he would     
strip in a public place4 ,a rule of     
mental chastity3 ,do not hold           
promiscuous mental intercourse4 ,the    
shallow would intrude into these austere

 places like picnickers in a sanctuary1 
littering it with their luncheon refuse4
 ,let the artist raise his              
thought-stained face from his toil1     
smiling but mute4  ,fritz guarded his   
secrets well4 ,a sudden flash of        
arrested eye1 a certain silent          
intentness of gaze1 an interest in a    
subject which would seem altogether out 
of proportion to its importance1 a look 
of perpetual expectancy were all that   
betrayed his search4 ,he was learning1  
learning1 learning3 every hour1 every   
minute4 ,sometimes for days together he 
would seem dormant--practical people    
would have said loafing--lazily         
absorbing impressions as it had been    
through his pores4 ,again he seemed to  
devour scenery1 faces1 books1 ideas with
 an appetite that was insatiable4  ,a   
young sculptor1 meeting ,fritz1 observed
 to me privately1  ,what an unromantic  
exterior for an artist6  ,the joke was  
too good to tell ,fritz for1 all        
innocently on the sculptor's part1 it   

revealed a secret which ,i was not      
supposed to know3 that ,fritz           
instinctively cultivated this           
young-man-just-out-of-college-and-doing-
well-in-business exterior as a high     
board fence behind which1 free from     
intrusion1 to train the muscles of his  
mind and cultivate the golden orchards  
of his soul4  ,he had to4 ,for once he  
had mastered the tools of his trade     
there was absolutely no one to teach him
 the things he most needed to know4 ,he 
must go it alone4 ,he knew it4 ,and he  
was going4 ,that was the secret of the  
watchful1 hungry look of him--the look  
of one aware of a ravenous appetite and 
never sure of his next meal4 ,that was  
the secret of his inarticulate gratitude
 to anyone who happened to be able to   
put him in the way of finding the food  
his spirit craved4 ,he discovered that  
the composers knew more about painting  
than most painters1 and he used to turn 
up at ,symphony concerts or at the opera
 with the look of a small boy fresh from

 a session with the jam pot behind the  
pantry door4 ,he wasn't saying anything1
 but you knew that he'd got it4 ,he made
 a bee-line for ,beethoven and ,wagner4 
,he came away after a performance of    
,tristan most divinely drunk on the     
strongest wine in music4  ,for the      
method of these composers was the method
 which he had chosen for himself        
unconsciously4 ,he was not satisfied to 
write a thin melody4 ,he was determined 
to teach his brush the rich and         
complicated instrumentation of an       
orchestral score4 ,not this face or that
 landscape was what he planned to put on
 canvas1 but the abundance of life which
 he had absorbed through every avenue of
 sense4 ,not a violin alone1 nothing    
less than the full orchestra would      
content him4  ,i ask myself whether ,i  
shall ever see anything more inspiriting
 than the quiet1 secret quest of this   
young man for an excellence and a       
mastery not only unrecognized and       
unrewarded by the social order in which 

he lived1 but not even comprehended4    
,this is the courage of the creative    
mind3 that it is prepared to meet alike 
its triumph or its defeat in an utter   
moral solitude4 ,stories of the physical
 courage which ,fritz displayed on the  
field of battle were to come later4444  
,which is likely to advance the ,kingdom
 of ,heaven on earth more speedily--the 
courage of the body1 to destroy2 or the 
courage of the mind1 to create8  ,is all
 this too eulogistic8 ,oh1 come6 ,he    
must have had faults1 weaknesses1 common
 spots4 444 ,i suppose so4 ,to tell the 
truth ,i never noticed them4 ,there was 
a trait1 as ,i first remember him1 of   
too ready assent to the opinions of     
others which it amused me to attribute  
to peasant ancestry2 but1 after all1    
that conformity was only outward and it 
soon disappeared4 ,in matters really    
vital to him his will was granite and he
 commanded a silence which could        
vociferate ,hands off6  ,his very       
inarticulate tongue gave promise of     

greatness4 ,one saw all this life-stuff 
entering into him4 ,he could never      
express it in speech4 ,it was a         
necessity of his being to express it    
somehow4 ,it would have to come out on  
canvas4  ,oh1 once in a great while the 
curtain would be dropped4 ,some lucky   
turn of conversation would relax the    
inhibitions and liberate his tongue4    
,then for a few minutes1 perhaps for an 
hour1 one would be shown the treasure   
house within4 ,what shall ,i say of     
those glimpses8 ,there are times to walk
 fearfully lest one smash something     
which cannot be replaced1 and these     
occasions were of them4 ,treasures not  
of this world2 possessions which honored
 the possessor by being held in honor2  
bins heaped1 as it had been1 with jewels
 and brocades2 others which gaped with a
 sacrificial emptiness2 spaces eked out 
with the heroic poverty of one dedicated
 to the monasticism of a creative       
career4  ,enough4444 ,i saw--what ,i    
saw4         99       99       99       

99       99  ,and withal he was half    
pagan4 ,the physical gratification with 
which he drank in the beauty of the     
world reminded me of that statuette by  
,roderick ,hudson1 ,dipsos 7,thirst7--a 
boy1 feet planted wide apart1 head      
thrown back1 slaking his throat out of a
 gourd held in both hands4 ,fritz was   
that boy4 ,the ugliness of modern       
clothes disgusted him4 ,he was alert for
 chances to take off his own3 impromptu 
baths in cold brooks on walking trips1  
or long days of summer sunshine on      
lonely stretches of sea beach with      
gleaming yellow sands4 ,there was some  
place among the mountains of ,west      
,virginia where he used to go3 ledges of
 flat rock above a rushing river4 ,all  
day long they gathered warmth from the  
sun1 retaining it well into the night4  
,when the moon had risen he loved to    
steal away for a plunge in the river1   
then lie out naked in the moonlight on  
these great slabs of warm rock1 alone   
with the magic night4     ,,viii   ,in  

,may1 #aiag1 he came to ,boston from    
,pittsburgh4 ,i was in ,parkersburg1    
,west ,virginia4 ,he came there4        
,conscription impended4 ,under his      
composure the struggle was going on4    
,tolstoy had converted him4 ,what was he
 to do8  ,if there were no one but      
myself to consider4441 said he1 ,but the
 suffering which you would have no      
hesitation in imposing on yourself you  
hesitate to impose on those dearer to   
you than yourself4  ,he was thrilled by 
the nonresistance of the still-young    
,russian revolution3  ,wonderful people1
 liberated by their refusal to kill6    
,they fold their arms and say ',shoot6' 
,the ,cossacks refuse to shoot them4    
,and a despotism1 centuries old1 comes  
tumbling down4 ,it proves everything    
that ,tolstoy has said4  ,for three     
days1 tramping about the scrubby        
countryside1 rambling along the banks of
 the ,ohio1 rowing up the swift1 muddy  
current of the ,kanawah1 the dilemma of 
a man born to create and commandeered to

 destroy was threshed out4 ,never before
 had he spoken so freely4 ,the economic 
causes of the trouble he understood     
fairly well1 but it was startling with  
what a seeing eye he pierced the        
illusions which beset that time4 ,by    
that faculty of divination peculiar to  
the artist's mind he reached1 at one    
leap1 conclusions which the thinker only
 arrives at after laborious effort4 ,and
 he was a young man without an illusion 
left1 steadfastly looking the ugliest   
facts of our social order in the face4  
,on the last evening of his stay we were
 standing on the steel spider web of a  
suspension bridge which spans the ,ohio1
 watching a sunset unfurl its banners of
 blood and fire4  ,all day there had    
been thunder and rain1 and eastward     
behind the towers and spires of the city
 skyline still hung the retreating      
clouds1 sullen and dark4 ,fritz pointed 
to where1 against that gloomy cloud     
bank1 high above the city and gilded red
 from the setting sun1 rose two symbols3

 one on the tip of a spire1 the other on
 the staff atop a tower3 cross and flag4
  ,church1 said he grimly1 and ,state4  
,the next day he returned to ,pittsburgh
 to register for the draft4         99  
99       99       99       99  ,july    
found me back in ,new ,england at a farm
 on the banks of the ,merrimac in ,west 
,newbury4 ,returning one noon from an   
errand up the hills to the village ,i   
was hailed by the children with a shout3
  ,a friend of yours is here4  ,who is  
he8  ,he told us his name but we've     
forgotten it4  ,what does he look like8 
,descriptions varied3  ,he's awfully    
strong1 said the boy4  ,he has shiny    
black hair and black eyes1 said the     
littlest girl4  ,he wears his coat off  
and his sleeves rolled up1 said the     
biggest little girl1 and she added1 with
 the spontaneous poetry of childhood1   
,and his hands are beeootiful6  ,where  
is he8  ,down by the river4  ,under the 
maples1 lying in the tall grass at the  
foot of a steep bank which sloped to the

 stream1 with children clambering all   
over him1 was ,fritz4 ,he scrambled to  
his feet and came forward putting out   
his hand with that awkwardness of       
meeting after an absence which he never 
quite outgrew1 but his eyes snapped with
 enjoyment at my astonishment4  ,it     
appeared that he had been painting some 
one in a ,massachusetts mill city and   
had dashed up here between-whiles4      
,there is a tiny hut perched like a     
brown owl on a knoll in a grove of      
hickories beside the river4 ,to this    
hermitage we retired and he related the 
news of the intellectual underworld in  
,pittsburgh4 ,roger ,baldwin had been   
there1 much to his comfort4 ,a friend   
whose portrait he had been painting1    
aware that the mildest radicalism had   
now become high treason1 had remarked by
 way of chaffing him1  ,i hope they give
 you a cell with a north light4  ,he    
unburdened with a tone of sheer physical
 relief3  ,this frantic enthusiasm for  
'democracy1' said he1 on the part of    

people who have spent their whole lives 
combating it6  ,he sat relaxed in a deep
 chair1 hands hanging limp on its       
arms--hands large1 strongly muscled1    
marked with heavy veins1 the fingers    
full-fleshed at their tips1 the skin    
bronzed by the sun4  ,tatters of        
sunlight1 reflected from the wavelets of
 the river obliquely up underneath the  
hickory boughs1 flickered on the ceiling
 and walls of the hut4  ,disillusioned  
he was1 but not cynical4 ,his humor was 
a bath to a sore spirit4 ,he kindled1 in
 the moral solitude of that hour1 a     
little fire of faith and hope4 ,it      
struck me anew1 eyeing him as he sat    
there1 what a beautiful creature he was1
 inside and out4  ,there was in him1    
too1 an odd streak of stoicism4 ,keen as
 he was for the eats1 he delighted in   
little acts of self-discipline4 ,that   
afternoon1 it being necessary for me to 
try for a nap1 he cleared out to gather 
views of river and woods4 ,an hour later
 ,i discovered this young ,spartan1     

hands clasped behind head1 spine        
stretched along the plank flooring of   
the narrow ledge in front of the hut1   
sleeping quietly4444  ,the next day he  
made himself everlastingly solid with   
the people at the farm by spending the  
whole morning fitting screens to the    
multitudinous doors and windows of their
 ark of a house4 ,everyone wanted ,fritz
 to stay a month4  ,at nine that evening
 he left4 ,as we trudged over the road  
in the warm darkness of the summer      
night1 he talked soberly of the dubious 
future4         99       99       99    
99       99  ,he was not called until   
the following ,april1 #aiah4 ,twice that
 winter he came to ,boston4 ,number #id 
,charles ,street had been dismantled4   
,but the third-floor-back on ,pinckney  
,street received him with an extra cot  
for bivouac4  444 ,this should have been
 the longest chapter of all1 and the    
best4 ,i find that ,i cannot write it4  
99       99       99       99       99  
,only a postscript4 ,i asked him for a  

picture of himself4  ,what do you want1 
he inquired1 a painting8  ,my ideas had 
been far more modest3  ,beggars should  
not be choosers4 ,i will take what ,i   
can get3 painting1 photograph1          
snap-shot3 and be thankful4  ,what size 
would you like8  ,small enough so that  
it can go wherever ,i go4  ,he made no  
promises4 ,his way was to wait until the
 time came and then let the performance 
speak4  ,not three weeks later it came3 
a sketch in oils1 head and shoulders1   
ten inches by twelve1 not at all the    
cold greenish grays ,i had anticipated  
from his habitual attitude of           
self-effacement1 but on the contrary a  
scheme of rich golden browns4 ,he has   
painted his own portrait with the same  
reticence which looks out of its eyes4  
,strangers seeing it remark1  ,what a   
striking face6  ,his friends view it and
 say1  ,he was much finer looking than  
that4     ,,ix   ,the rest is seen      
dimly1 as through a mist4 ,his voice is 
heard1 distinct and clear1 but as from a

 great distance4  ,to ,ralph ,heard he  
writes from ,camp ,lee1 ,virginia3  ,i  
am eating1 sleeping1 and drilling with  
physical enthusiasm1 and later1 ,tell   
the fellows that the dust is gathering  
on my palette4  ,a letter to me in ,may 
tells of taking his pipe at the day's   
end and strolling into the woods of the 
camp to be alone with the song of birds 
and tints of sunset4 ,late in ,july came
 a letter from ,france describing a     
march between gleam of gold in the west 
and a rising full moon in the east1 444 
aeroplanes in action overhead and       
cannonading over the hills to the east4 
,then occurs this3  ,i am little        
different from as you know me1 even     
though now in a machine gun             
company3--,curious irony4--  ,and this3 
,continue your work4444 ,other victories
 are transient4  ,and this was his      
farewell3  ,we have seen great visions  
and dreamed splendid dreams4 ,and the   
faith you have in me1--which ,i prize so
 desperately1--,i have in you1 no matter

 where each of us may be headed4 ,we    
will live the best we can--that1 through
 our friendship1 is all we ask of each  
other4         99       99       99     
99       99  ,on ,january #bc1 #aiai1   
one of his brothers writes from ,le     
,mans1 ,france3  ,st4 ,remis du ,plain  
is the name of the little town where    
,fred's company was billeted4 ,it is    
perched on the top of a hill in the     
middle of a vast plain and was visible  
for a long time as ,i headed towards it4
 ,this was the trip ,i had planned long 
ago1 and pictured a happy meeting2      
however1 it was decreed otherwise4      
,passing up the narrow street ,i saw    
',headquarters1 #acf ,m4 ,g4 ,bn4'      
written on the door of an old stone     
house4 ,the orderly room was full of    
officers4 ,i inquired for ,lieut4 ,rew1 
the one who had previously written to   
me1 and introduced myself as ,fred's    
brother4 ,the officer who was dictating 
stopped work1 came over and shook hands 
with me4 ,the captain commanding the    

battalion came from behind the table1   
greeted me and offered a word of        
sympathy4 ,soon all the officers were   
grouped about me and ,i saw that ,fred  
was considered one of their number4 ,the
 captain said1 ',he was the best        
sergeant ,i ever had4' ,they invited me 
to mess with them1 and ,lieut4 ,rew said
 ,i was to bunk with him1 'for my men   
have cooties1' but ,i saw this was all  
done so that they might have a chance to
 speak of ,fred4 ,one of the sergeants  
told me that when the news came1 the    
officers were even more broken up about 
it than the men4  ,i was introduced to  
the noncoms with whom ,fred seems to    
have been a favorite4 ,in the evening1  
as we sat around an open fireplace1 ,i  
asked if ,fred had had a 'buddy4' ,the  
sergeant with whom ,fred used to sleep  
said1 ',no4 ,he was everybody's friend4'
  ,as ,i was walking up to the kitchen1 
a private stepped out of the mess line  
and came up to me saying he knew me     
through my resemblance to ,fred4 ,soon  

the mess line was demoralized and ,i was
 the center of a lively mass all talking
 at once and ,i could easily see why the
 captain recommended him so highly as a 
sergeant4--',he never said a harsh      
word1'--',he was always cheerful and    
never kicked1'--',when we complained    
about the feed or anything1 he said it  
would be better later4' ,they talked so 
long that at last the cook asked me if  
,i would not please eat so that they    
would eat and let him get through4      
99       99       99       99       99  
,the division left ,camp ,lee1 ,june    
#ba1 #aiah1 and sailed from ,newport    
,news on the ,italian transport         
,caserta4 ,it was a dirty boat1 the feed
 rotten1 and the trip rough4 ,everybody 
was disgusted4 ,fred was about the only 
one of the company who never missed a   
meal4 ,a private told me that he and    
,fred were standing at the rail in the  
bow of the ship one night talking about 
a number of things4 ,this fellow voiced 
the sentiment of most of the company    

when he said he only wanted to make one 
more ocean trip and that was in the     
reverse direction4 ,fred looked far out 
across the water and remarked3 ',i could
 stand a few more4'  ,they landed at    
,brest on ,july #e and entrained at once
 for ,souville4 ,they used the ,french  
type of compartment cars where with ten 
men and full equipment there wasn't much
 room to move about4 ,fred was in charge
 of his compartment and1 with his usual 
ingenuity1 devised means of disposing of
 the equipment to best advantage for    
their comfort4 ,he also carefully       
arranged the daily menu consisting of   
bread1 corned beef1 tomatoes1 beans1 and
 jam4 ,he did all this in such a        
serio-comic way that the fellows are    
still laughing over the memories of the 
trip4  ,on ,september #bj the division  
led the drive into the ,argonne forest4 
,this is reputed to have been the       
hardest battle of the war in respect to 
the ,germans' shell fire and the        
suffering caused by the rainy weather   

and lack of shelter4 ,through it all    
there was not a healthier nor more      
cheerful man than ,fred4 ,recognized by 
the commanding officer as having 'the   
coolest head in the company and afraid  
of nothing' he was made a sergeant after
 this battle over the heads of some old 
,national ,guardsmen2 but there was not 
a murmur--all were satisfied4 ,when they
 came out of the woods he helped the    
doctor with the wounded 7he seems to    
have helped everywhere1 from the kitchen
 to the captain's private office74      
,after they had all been attended to1 he
 asked the doctor to look him over4 ,he 
had received three flesh wounds in      
shoulder and arm4 ,he picked out the    
pieces of shrapnel himself and had the  
doctor bandage him4 ,after which he went
 about his work as usual4  ,october #aj 
found the company in the ,st4 ,mihiel   
sector1 and on ,october #bb it moved    
into ,belgium4 ,all this meant miles of 
weary hiking under a full pack2 but     
,fred remained the same cheerful fellow 

as ever4 ,he amused the whole company   
with his doings4 ,he found an old       
hair-clipper among some salvage and     
immediately opened a barber shop where  
lieutenants as well as privates got     
their hair cut4 ,another thing that ,i  
recognized as characteristic were the   
remarks pertaining to his appetite4 ,he 
never lost it4 ,he was known to have    
'eats' on his person all the time4 ,he  
had a special knack of hunting out farm 
houses1 engaging madame in conversation1
 and coming away with bread1 eggs1 or   
cheese in his knapsack4 ,occasionally he
 did some sketching and his letters were
 a joy to the lieutenant who censored   
them because of the excellent           
descriptions they contained4444  ,the   
company went over the top early in the  
morning of ,october #ca4 ,fred was      
wounded in the left side by a piece of  
high explosive shell at about #e3cj     
,a4,m4 ,it was before daylight and few  
knew he had been hit4 ,when they did    
hear it1 they were far in advance and   

,fred had been carried to ,evacuation   
,hospital ,number ,five1 at ,staden1    
,belgium4 ,he died there on ,november   
#b4 ,one of the boys who helped carry   
him to the rear says that he was fully  
conscious despite the serious nature of 
his wound1 and tells of how he directed 
them what to do--how he told them to    
leave him when the shells fell too fast 
7which they wouldn't do7--of how they   
left him1 quite himself1 at the         
first-aid station4444  ,he was never    
referred to as a bully or even as a     
fighter--he was spared the grewsome     
experience of hand-to-hand fighting1 for
 from the first the ,germans were in    
full flight2 but he was remembered for  
his cheerfulness1 his kindness toward   
others and especially for his lack of   
harsh words4 ,his favorite text from the
 ,bible was that part of the ,sermon on 
the ,mount known as the beatitudes1 and 
he often wondered why ministers did not 
preach on it more4 ,he constantly spoke 
of this to the men4 7,the italics are   

not in the original47  ,his fire has    
gone out1 but he left a glow in the     
hearts of these men which will never go 
out4         99       99       99       
99       99  ,and now it is time that a 
few questions be asked1 simple and      
direct4 ,it is due him4  ,why is it that
 when he set himself to create he had to
 contend against that dead-weight of    
indifference if not the active hostility
 of organized society recorded in these 
pages2 but when he was commandeered to  
destroy1 that society clothed him1 fed  
him1 sheltered him1 trained him1        
transported him1 paid him1 nursed him1  
and buried him8  ,it is well that we    
should know what has been squandered4   
,he that might have ennobled generations
 of men with his great visions and his  
splendid dreams is mingling his clay    
with the soil of ,belgium4 ,he had the  
seeds of genius4 ,capitalism made him a 
machine gunner4  ,is this the best we   
can find for our artists to do8 ,is it  
any wonder that the creative minds of   

to-day are finding themselves driven to 
social revolution as their art-form8    
,in the brown-owl hut beside the        
,merrimac that summer day in #aiag he   
remarked in a tone of indulgent irony3  
,the 'military experts' have found a    
nice1 polite term for men killed or too 
badly maimed to fight any more4  ,what  
is it8 ,i asked4  ',wastage4'           
,music3--,beethoven3 ,finale of ,the    
,ninth ,symphony4     ,x  ,,visitation  
,here1 at the end1 let those measures of
 the ,ninth ,symphony sound3 no dirge2  
but a paean of joy4 ,for in that choral 
ecstasy of ,beethoven's hymn to human   
brotherhood speaks the whole meaning and
 purpose of the life that was4  ,why    
have ,i detained you for a tale so      
plain8 ,what was he but an obscure young
 painter1 thirty years old1 with his way
 to make8 ,why should ,i point him out  
to you among the millions8 ,because he  
was my friend8 ,no4 ,because he is      
yours4 ,because ,i thought ,i saw in him
 the seeds of greatness8 ,no4 ,because  

the seeds of greatness which were in him
 are in you2 and he shall make you see  
them4  ,i give him to you young men to  
be your friend1 loyal and high-minded4  
,i give him to you young women to be    
your lover1 clean of body and of soul4  
,he will be worthy of your friendship   
and of your love1 and you shall be      
worthy of his in return4  ,i give him to
 you in all the beauty of his youth and 
he shall never grow old1 but he shall   
himself become one of the heroic        
friends1 one of the great companions4 ,i
 give you his soul to carry in your own1
 a life within a life4 ,through his eyes
 you may see the wonder and glory of the
 beautiful world which he saw so        
joyously4 ,let his generous heart beat  
through yours his passion for an ideal  
society and a better time than ours4    
,he is to be immortal4 ,and it is you   
who must make him so4 ,let him kindle in
 your hearts a fire which will not go   
out4 ,he that would have made great     
canvases glow with the might of his     

spirit and the splendor of his          
imagination shall not now live by art   
alone1 but by the living deeds of you4  
,you shall be his masterpieces4 ,you1   
immortal youth1 shall be his            
immortality4  ,away from the dust and   
heat of the day1 when the loud world    
crowds and clamors1 he shall make for   
you1 all in a dim1 cool chamber of your 
souls1 a sanctuary--a little space of   
sacred friendship--where you may enter  
and1 closing the door1 renew your vows4 
,you may have him to stand beside you in
 hours of triumph1 and in hours of      
disaster2 steadier of your aim1         
sustainer of your courage4  ,sit in the 
twilight with folded hands and he shall 
speak to you4 ,when moonbeams pour their
 silent music into your chamber at dead 
of night and your sight rejoices in     
them1 it is he4 ,hearken to the beat of 
surf along a lonely shore2 to the song  
of the hermit thrush in dense thickets2 
to the whisper of the night wind among  
the leaves3 ,it is he6 ,kindle to the   

charm and mystery of a face in the      
crowd1 and ,it is he6 ,thrill at the    
return of many-blossomed spring1 at the 
strength of men1 at the grace of women1 
and your joy shall be his joy4 ,in every
 visitation to you of the truth that not
 by hate1 not by blows1 but only by the 
love of the human heart can the world be
 won from its evil1 he shall live1 he   
shall live again4 ,and the color and    
rhythm of life1 the joy of begetting    
which he never knew1 the joy of creating
 which he knew so abundantly1 when it is
 yours shall be his also4 ,and so all   
that is highest and best in you1 all    
that inspired him and that he inspired1 
shall be the works of art by which he is
 remembered4  ,immortal youth1 let him  
be comrade and friend to you as he was  
to me2 let him live forever in your     
young hearts1 himself forever young1    
bathed in the glory of eternal dawn4