,illu/ration3 ,br[n ,bros4 ,,on ,,h] ,,w$d+ ,,day ,! greate/ *>m ( ! bride's co/ume lies 9 its simplicity ,,book ,,( ,,etiquette ,,by ,,lillian ,,ei*l] ,,volume ,i ,,illu/rat$ ,,nelson ,,d\bl$ay1 ,,inc4 ,,g>d5 ,,city ,,new ,,york #aibd ,,copyright1 #aiba1 ,,by ,,nelson ,,d\bl$ay1 ,,inc4 ,,all ,,rights ,,res]v$ ,,pr9t$ ,,9 ,,! ,,unit$ ,,/ates ,,preface ,success )\t culture is l old-fa%ion$ /rawb]ry %ort cake )\t ! :ipp$ cream4 ,x has no flavor4 ,!re are c]ta9 little c\rte\s obs]vances1 c]ta9 social =malities t bespeak ! true lady1 ! true g5tlem54 ,"s ( u call x good =m4 ,"s ( u call x culture4 ,"s ( u call x etiquette4 ,b we all admit t x makes ! _w a bett] place to live 94 ,9 ,italy1 "y m5 & wom5 are consid]$ b5 educato1 n :5 !y c read & write1 b :5 !y "k ! e/abli%$ =ms ( conv5tion--:5 !y c %[ by a correct dignity & ease ( mann] t !y are p]fect 9 _! k ( ! rules ( good society4 ,&1 aft] all1 don't y y\rself judge p by :at !y d1 & say1 & we>8 ,don't y read 9 _! mann] & appe>ance ! secret ( _! inn] wor?8 ,isn't "* & disposition reveal$ 9 ! out] p]sonality8 ,p]haps y h he>d ! /ory ( ! g5tleman :o prid$ himself on be+ p]fect 9 ! art ( etiquette4 ,on "o occasion1 he pass$ a lake & he>d a dr[n+ man call = help4 ,quickly he ?rew (f 8 coat & 0 ab\t to plunge into ! wat]1 :5 he sudd5ly rememb]$ t he _h nev] be5 introduc$ to ! /ruggl+ victim4 ,putt+ on 8 coat aga91 he proce$$ on 8 way q self-satisfi$4 ,?is is an in/ance :]e common-s5se w\ld h be5 ! bett] "p ( etiquette4 ,too rigid an obs]vance ( ! laws ( good society makes !m no?+ %ort ( an absurdity4 ,! purpose ( correct mann]s is n to enable u to /rut ab\t 9 society & comm& ! admir+ glances ( ! p ar\nd u--z ! peacock1 9 its vanity1 p>ades be=e onlook]s 9 a pr\d dignity t is q obvi\sly assum$4 ,! true s]vice ( etiquette is s to /r5g!n & simplify ! social life t we are able to d :at is absolutely correct & "r )\t ev5 /opp+ to ?9k ab\t x4 ,t1 !n1 is ! purpose ( ,,! ,,book ,,( ,,etiquette--to give to ! read] s cle> & def9ite an und]/&+ ( ! social life t he w be able to h at all times1 "u all conditions1 t unaffect$ grace & *>m ( mann] t ! ,fr5* l to call savoir faire4 ,x has be5 writt51 n = ! exce$+ly ill-br$ or = ! highly poli%$1 b = ^? :o f9d a c]ta9 s5se ( satisfaction 9 do+ :at is correct--s9c]e m5 & wom5 :o1 9 ! p]=mance ( _! bus9ess & social duties1 f9d t !re is a con/ant ne$ = cordial & graci\s relation%ip ) ^? ar\nd !m4 ,if ! foll[+ *apt]s awak5 9 ! read] ! desire = clos] companion%ip ) ! va/ _w ( human nature1 ( :i* we are all a "p2 if x takes f 8 nature all t is co>se1 awkw>d & unref9$1 sub/itut+ in/ead a gallantry ( _s & a g5tl5ess ( bre$+2 if x makes him a m lov+ & a m lovable p]son--!n ,,! ,,book ,,( ,,etiquette w h s]v$ its purpose4 ,incid5tally1 ! au?or is indebt$ to ,mr4 ,l4 ,e4 ,smi?1 )\t ^: cop]ation ?is book w\ld nev] h be5 writt54 ,lillian ,ei*l]4 ,,cont5ts ,,*apt] ,,page ,,"p ,i ,i4 ,,introduction ,,to ,,etiquette #a ,:at is ,etiquette8--,laws ( ,society--,control ( ! ,impulses--,reg>d = ! ,rights ( ,o!rs--,! ,dang] ( ,intol]ance--,:y x ,pays to ,be ,agreeable--,! ,simple/ ,culture4 ,,ii4 ,,etiquette',s ,,rew>d #aa ,! ,orig9 ( ,mann]s--,! ,mann]s ( ,to-day--,good ,society 9 ,am]ica--,! ,true ,lady & ,g5tleman--,! ,secret ( ,social ,success--,:at ,mann]s ,w ,d = ,y--,etiquette's ,rew>d4 ,,iii4 ,,engagem5ts #bj ,( ,special ,importance--,! ,proposal--,! ,engagem5t ,r+--,ann\nc+ ! ,engagem5t--,! ,mo/ ,usual ,me?od--,ann\nc+ an ,engagem5t 9 ! ,newspap]s--,engagem5t ,gifts--,bridal ,%[]s--,l5g? ( ! ,engagem5t--,responsibility = ! ,w$d+--,families & ,fri5ds4 ,,iv4 ,,w$d+ ,,invitations ,,& ,,ann\ncem5ts #ca ,! ,w$d+ ,invitation--,size & ,mat]ial--,k9ds ( ,envelopes-- ,address+ ! ,envelopes--,invitations to ,*ur* ,w$d+--,invitation to ,home ,w$d+--,w$d+ 9 a ,fri5d's ,home--,:5 ,c>ds are ,enclos$ --,invitations to ,second ,m>riages--,invitation to ,w$d+ ,anniv]s>y --,in=mal ,w$d+ ,invitation--,ackn[l$g+ ! ,=mal ,w$d+ ,invitations--,:om to ,invite--,s5d+ ! ,invitations--,recall+ ! ,w$d+ ,invitation--,break+ an ,engagem5t--,return+ ,gifts-- ,:5 ,dea? ,int]v5es4 ,v4 ,,w$d+s #di ,! ,*ur* ,w$d+--,att5dants--,! ,bridesmaids--,rehe>sals-- ,reg>d+ ! ,u%]s--,! ,w$d+ ,day--,arriv+ at ! ,*ur*-- ,w$d+ ,music--,! ,w$d+ ,procession--,! ,c]emony--,leav+ ! ,alt>--,rice1 etc4--,! ,w$d+ ,reception--,! ,w$d+ ,breakfa/-- ,! ,w$d+ ,pres5t--,ackn[l$g+ ,w$d+ ,pres5ts--,! ,home ,w$d+ --,! ,second ,w$d+--,"s ,important ,conv5tions--,seek+ ,advice-- ,w$d+ ,anniv]s>ies--,! ,silv] ,w$d+--,! ,reception--,t9 & ,wood5 ,w$d+s--,! ,gold5 ,w$d+--,! ,gold5 ,w$d+ a ,glori\s ,a*ievem5t4 ,,vi4 ,,! ,,bride',s ,,outfit #gc ,orig9 ( ! ,tr\sseau--,! ,tr\sseau ( ,to-day--,ab\t ! ,l95s --,= ! ,bride--,! ,w$d+ ,dress--,! ,bride's ,veil--,w$d+ ,fl[]s--,dress ( ! ,maid ( ,honor--,m>ry+ 9 ,travel+ ,dress4 ,,vii4 ,,fun]als #hc ,fun]al ,cu/oms--,! ,fun]al ( ,to-day--,:5 ,dea? ,ent]s ! ,family--,tak+ ,*>ge--,ann\nc+ ! ,dea?--,"s ,necess>y ,prep>ations--,! ,ladies ( ! ,family--,! ,pall-,be>]s--,duties ( ,pall-,be>]s--,! ,*ur* ,fun]al--,ord] ( ,prec$5ce--,! ,h\se ,fun]al--,a ,po9t ( ,importance--,remov+ ,signs ( ,grief --,seclusion ,dur+ ,m\rn+--,dress at ,fun]als--,int]m5t & ,cremation--,m\rn+ ,dress--,m\rn+ ,dress = ,m5--,m\rn+ ,/ation]y4 ,,viii4 ,,*ri/5+s #ajd ,ann\nc+ ! ,bir? ( ! ,*ild--,respond+ to ! ,ann\ncem5t-- ,godp>5ts--,invitations to a ,*ri/5+--,a ,*ur* ,*ri/5+--,! ,h\se ,*ri/5+--,aft] ! ,baptism--,gifts4 ,,"p ,,ii ,i4 ,,introductions #aac ,purpose ( ! ,introduction--,creat+ ,conv]sation--,:5 to ,introduce--,importance ( ,c>e--,special ,introductions--,:5 ! ,"n ,isn't ,he>d--,! ,correct ,introduction--,gr\p ,introductions-- ,! ,*ance ,introduction--,incomplete ,introductions--,indirect ,introductions--,! ,ackn[l$gm5t--,=ms ( ,ackn[l$gm5t-- ,future ,recognition ( ,introduction--,introduc+ at ,d9n]-- ,introduc+ at ! ,dance--,introduc+ at ,receptions--,speak+ )\t ,introduction--,introduc+ ,*ildr5--,cordiality 9 ,introductions4 ,,ii4 ,,lett]s ,,( ,,introduction #ace ,! ,lett] ( ,introduction--,pres5t+ ! ,lett]--,ackn[l$g+ a ,lett] ( ,introduction--,model ,lett]s ( ,introduction--,! ,c>d ( ,introduction--,bus9ess ,introductions4 ,,iii4 ,,calls ,,& ,,call+ ,,cu/oms #adb ,! ,beg9n+ ( ,social ,calls--,:5 ,calls are ,made--,! ,prop] ,l5g? ( a ,call--,! ,day at ,home--,dress = ,calls--,pay+ ! ,fir/ ,call--,calls ( ,obligation--,ab\t ,return+ ,calls--,! ,call ( ,condol5ce--,! ,call ( ,congratulations & ,inquiry-- ,! ,social ,calls ( ,m5--,! ,invalid's ,call--,ask+ a ,new ,acqua9tance to ,call--,! ,woman's ,bus9ess ,call--,receiv+ ,calls--,duties ( ! ,ho/ess--,receiv+ ! ,*ance ,call]-- ,:5 ! ,ho/ is at ,home--,tak+ ,leave ( ! ,ho/ess--,! ,ev5+ ,call--,:5 ,g5tlem5 ,receive ,call]s--,mak+ a ,*ance ,call--,in=mal ,calls4 ,,iv4 ,,visit+ ,,c>ds--,,& ,,o!rs #afe ,y\r ,c>d a ,repres5tative ( ,y--,g5]al ,rules ,reg>d+ ,c>ds --,size ( ,c>ds = ,wom5--,size & ,mat]ial ( ,c>ds = ,m5-- ,titles on ,c>ds = ,wom5--,c>ds = ,wid[s--,! ,"y ,lady's ,c>d--,indicat+ ! ,day at ,home--,! ,m>ri$ ,c\ple's ,c>d-- ,us+ ,jr4 & ,sr4--,titles on ,c>ds = ,m5--,pr(essional ,c>ds = ,m5--,c>ds = ,m\rn+--,:5 ! ,woman ,goes a-,call+--,:5 ,m ?an ,"o ,c>d is ,left--,"s ,m ,po9ts ,ab\t ,calls & ,c>ds--,! ,*ance ,call--,simple ,c>d-,leav+--,%\ld a ,/rang] ,leave ,c>ds8--,c>ds & ,bus9ess ,calls--,:5 a ,man ,leaves ,c>ds --,! ,man's ,*ance ,call--,ab\t ,leav+ & ,po/+ ,c>ds--,leav+ ,c>ds ( ,inquiry--,ackn[l$g+ ,c>ds ( ,inquiry & ,condol5ce --,ann\ncem5t ,c>ds--,:5 ,travel+--,p4,p4,c4 ,c>ds4 ,v4 ,,invitations #aih ,"s ,g5]al ,rules--,invitation to a ,=mal ,dance--,accept+ ! ,invitation--,= ! ,in=mal ,dance--,! ,d9n] ,dance--,! ,db ,dance--,invitations = ! ,subscription ,dance--,ackn[l$g+ ,subscription ,dance ,invitations--,invitation to ,public ,ball-- ,reque/+ an ,invitation--,! ,d9n] ,invitation--,9 ,honor ( ,celebrat$ ,gue/s--,! ,ackn[l$gm5ts--,= ! ,in=mal ,d9n] --,:5 ! ,d9n] is ,n at ,home--,! ,daught] z ,ho/ess-- ,invit+ a ,/op-,gap--,to ,break a ,d9n] ,engagem5t--,invitations = ,lun*eons--,ackn[l$g+ ! ,lun*eon ,invitation--,! ,in=mal ,invitation--,reception ,invitations--,reception 9 ,honor ( a ,special ,gue/--,invitations to ,g>d5 ,p>ties-- ,ackn[l$g+ ! ,g>d5 ,p>ty ,invitation--,h\se or ,week-,end ,p>ties--,! ,bread-&-,butt] ,lett]--,invitations to ! ,!at] & ,op]a--,invitations to ,musicales & ,private ,!atricals--,*ildr5's ,p>ty ,invitations--,invitations to a ,*ri/5+--,a ,^w ( ,special ,caution4 ,,vi4 ,,correspond5ce #bce ,to-day & ,ye/]day--,! ,lett] ,y ,write--,! ,bus9ess ,lett] --,function ( ! ,social ,lett]--,! ,etiquette ( ,/ation]y-- ,lett] & ,note ,pap]--,cre/s & ,monograms--,use ( ! ,typewrit] --,reg>d+ ! ,salutation--,clos+ ! ,lett]--,address+ ! ,envelope--,lett] ( ,condol5ce--,ackn[l$g+ a ,lett] ( ,condol5ce--,etiquette ( ! ,fri5dly ,lett]--,! ,*ild's ,lett]--,lett]s to ,p]sons ( ,title4 ,,vii4 ,,p>5ts ,,& ,,*ildr5 #bed ,! ,home--,appe>ance ( ! ,h\se--,dress--,dress = ,*ildr5-- ,*ildr5 & ,developm5t--,"k ,y\r ,*ildr56--,imitation--,! ,*ild's ,spee*--,at ! ,table--,playmates--,*ildr5's ,p>ties-- ,plann+ ,surprises--,receiv+ ! ,"y ,gue/s--,ab\t ! ,bir?day ,p>ty--,:5 ! ,"y ,gue/s ,leave--,*ildr5's ,ent]ta9m5ts ,away f ,home--,*ildr5 & ,danc+--,a ,^w to ,p>5ts--,amusem5ts--,let ! ,*ild be ,natural--,! ,"y ,girl--,! ,girl's ,mann]--,! ,*ap]on--,! ,"y ,c\ntry ,miss --,! ,girl & ,h] ,"m--,= ! ,%y & ,self-,consci\s-- ,=get ,ab\t ,y\rself--,:y ! ,%y are ,awkw>d--,self-,confid5ce ,v]sus ,conceit--,c\ntry ,hospitality--,importance ( ,simplicity-- ,! ,ho/ess--,! ,gue/--,= ,c\ntry ,folks--,! ,endless ,r\nd ( ,hospitality--,:5 to ,invite--,! ,gue/s & ,_! ,duties-- ,address+ ,titl$ ,p4 ,,li/ ,,( ,,illu/rations ,,on ,,h] ,,w$d+ ,,day ,frontispiece ,,page ,,*ur* ,,decorat$ ,,= ,a ,,=mal ,,w$d+ #fb ,,an ,,alt> ,,= ,a ,,home ,,w$d+ #adb ,,decorations ,,= ,a ,,w$d+ ,,9 ,a ,,small ,,*ur* #aij ,,"p ,i ,! p[] ( mann]s is incessant--an elem5t z unconcealable z fire4 ,! nobility _c 9 any c\ntry be disguis$1 & no m 9 a republic or a democracy ?an 9 a k+dom4 ,!re are c]ta9 mann]s :i* are le>n$ 9 good society1 ( t =ce t1 if a p]son h !m1 he or %e mu/ be consid]$1 & is ev]y:]e welcome1 ?\gh )\t beauty1 or weal?1 or g5ius4 --,f ,em]son's ,essays4 ,,book ,,( ,,etiquette ,,*apt] ,i ,,introduction ,,to ,,etiquette ,,:at ,,is ,,etiquette8 ,at a meet+ ( army (fic]s dur+ ! ,civil ,w>1 "o ( !m began to relate a que/ionable /ory1 rem>k+1 z if to excuse 8 lack ( good ta/e1 t !re 7 no ladies pres5t4 ,g5]al ,grant1 :o 0 act+ z *airman ( ! meet+1 rem>k$1 ,no1 b !re are g5tlem5--& he refus$ to all[ ! (fic] to cont9ue ! /ory4 ,:at is a g5tleman8 ,! "q is an old "o4 ,x _c be ance/ry1 = (t5 ! son ( mo/ noble & honor$ p>5tage is m]ely a co>se comp\nd ( clay & money1 (f]$ to society z a g5tleman1 ,x _c be dress--= surely ,beau ,brummell 0 n :at ! _w loves to call a g5tleman1 despite 8 /iffly />*$ cravats & brightly poli%$ boots4 ,x _c be money1 = !n _m a common ?ief1 made weal?y by 8 ill-gott5 ga9s1 w\ld be entitl$ to ! "n ( g5tleman4 ,no1 x is some?+ t goes deep] ?an ance/ry or dress or weal?--some?+ t is nobl] & f9] ?an any1 or all1 ( ^!4 ,p]haps x c be be/ express$ by ?is beautiful example ( :at true etiquette c mean3 ,h5ry ,w>d ,bee*]1 on a v cold day1 /opp$ to buy a newspap] f a ragg$ y\ng/] :o /ood %iv]+ on a corn]4 ,poor little fell[1 he said1 ar5't y cold /&+ "h8 ,! boy look$ up ) a smile & said1 ,i 01 sir--be=e y pass$4 ,! ^w etiquette itself does n mean v mu*4 ,x comes f ! same orig9 z ! ^w ticket & orig9ally meant ! rules ( c\rt c]emony pr9t$ on tickets t 7 giv5 to ea* p]son pres5t$ at c\rt4 ,b ?r\gh g5]ations ! ideal ( p]fect$ culture surg$1 until to-day we h a code ( mann]s t is ! pride & inspiration ( ref9$ liv+4 ,,laws ,,( ,,society ,etiquette1 aft] all1 is n ! f9i%$ "w1 b m]ely a tool t op5s ! portals to a broad] life1 to a great] social happ9ess4 ,?r\gh its influ5ce we are br\ght into close companion%ip ) ! really wor?-:ile m9ds ( our day4 ,by fai?ful con/ancy to its rules we gradually mold our *>act]s until1 9 our outw>d dignity & *>m1 ! _w reads & und]/&s our ideals4 ,!re is 9 e human nature ! desire = social happ9ess--:i* is1 frankly1 9 o!r words1 ! desire s to impress by "o's mann] t "o w be welcome & respect$ :]ev] "o *ances to be4 ,& x is only by adh]+ to ! fundam5tal laws ( good society t ?is social happ9ess c ev] be atta9$4 ,9 obs]v+ ! e/abli%$ etiquette ( mod]n society x is necess>y to pay p>ticul> att5tion to "o's appe>ance1 mann]1 & spee*4 ,x mu/ be rememb]$ t ! _w is a h>% judge & is p]fectly will+ to condemn u by outw>d appe>ances4 ,9 ! /reet-c>1 9 ! ball-room1 at ! !at]--e day p are read+ ! /ory ( our *>act]s & ideals4 ,society has its own def9ite code ( mann]s t mu/ be obs]v$ be=e "o c ent] its portals4 ,!re are c]ta9 rules t mu/ be foll[$ be=e "o c ent] its envi$ circle4 ,!re are conv5tionalities t mu/ be obs]v$ 9 reque/+ a lady to dance1 9 ackn[l$g+ an introduction1 9 us+ ! knife & =k at ! d9n] table4 ,!re are c]ta9 prevail+ modes 9 dress+ = ! !at] & reception4 ,to "k & adh]e to ^! laws is to be admitt$ to ! highe/ society & enjoy ! company ( ! mo/ brilliant m9ds4 ,etiquette is an art--! art ( do+ & say+ ! correct ?+ at ! correct "t--! art ( be+ able to hold oneself always 9 h&1 no matt] h[ exact+ ! circum/ance4 ,& l music or pa9t+ or writ+1 ! m y /udy x1 ! m y apply y\rself to its pr9ciples1 ! m p]fectly y\r own "* is mold$4 ,,control ,,( ,,! ,,impulses ,! cultur$ man is nev] angry1 nev] impati5t1 nev] demon/rative4 ,8 actions & spee* are temp]$ ) a dispassionate calmness & tranquillity t ! ,fr5* admir+ly call sang froid4 ,he kn[s h[ to control 8 emotions s effectively t no "o c read1 9 8 self-possess$ expression1 :e!r he is angry or pleas$1 disc\rag$ or eag]4 ,p]haps ! mo/ /rik+ & admirable ?+ ab\t a man ( bre$+ is 8 c>efully discipl9$ impulses4 ,he may at times lose control ( himself1 b he is nev] petulant1 nev] incoh]5t4 ,he may be greatly en?usia/ic ab\t "s unexpect$ happ5+1 b he nev] becomes excit$1 nev] loses control ( 8 reason+ faculties4 ,he nev] gives ! appe>ance ( be+ 9 a hurry1 no matt] h[ swift 8 actions may be--!re is always ab\t him ! sugge/ion ( leisure & poise4 ,swe>+ is ess5tially vulg>4 ,x 0 ,dr4 ,crane1 ! fam\s essayi/ & philosoph]1 :o said 9 "o ( 8 delightful talks1 ,! sup]ior man is g5tle4 ,x is only ! man ) a defective vocabul>y t swe>s4 ,all noise is wa/e4 ,! sil5t sun is mighti] ?an ! :irlw9d4 ,! g5u9e lady speaks l[4 ,! mo/ /rik+ *>act]i/ic ( ! sup]ior ones is _! quiet1 _! poise4 ,!y h ab\t !m a s5se ( ! />s4 ,/rong feel+1 ang]1 h no place 9 ! social life4 ,we are all uneasy at times4 ,we all h our emb>rass+ mom5ts4 ,b ! well-br$ p]son kn[s h[ to conceal 8 emotions1 & impulses1 s well t no "o b himself kn[s t he is uneasy or emb>rass$4 ,x is n only exce$+ly unpleasant1 b x is also v poor =m to %[ by our ge/ures & fr[ns & spee* t we are annoy$ by "s circum/ance t is entirely beyond our control4 ,impulsiv5ess is (t5 ! cause ( s]i\s brea*es ( etiquette--brea*es t are1 socially speak+1 ! ru9 ( _m a ris+ "y man1 ( _m an o!rwise *>m+ "y woman4 ,! g5tleman nev] %[s by ha/y ^w or angry glance t he is displeas$ ) "s s]vice4 ,! lady nev] %[s1 ei!r 9 h] spee* or mann]1 t %e is excit$ ) "s unexpect$ happ5+1 or disappo9t$ because some?+ did n happ5 ! way %e plann$ x4 ,x is only by /udy+ ! rules ( etiquette & kn[+ absolutely :at is "r to d & say "u all conditions t "o acquires ?is spl5did self-possession & composure ( mann]4 ,,reg>d ,,= ,,! ,,rights ,,( ,,o!rs ,william ,de ,witt ,hyde1 9 8 book1 ,practical ,e?ics1 says1 ,polit5ess is prop] respect = human p]sonality4 ,rud5ess results f ?9k+ exclusively ab\t ourselves & c>+ no?+ = ! feel+s ( anybody else4 ,! s9c]e desire to br+ ! greate/ pleasure & lea/ pa9 to ev]yone we meet w g a long way t[>ds mak+ our mann]s m polite & c\rte\s4 ,! man or woman :o is truly cultur$1 truly well-br$1 tries to make ev]yone happy & at ease4 ,x is only ! exce$+ly vulg> p]son :o f9ds pleasure 9 hurt+ ! feel+s ( ! p ) :om he comes into contact4 ,x makes no diff]5ce h[ weal?y or h[ poor a p]son is1 h[ ignorant or educat$ he happ5s to be--z a fell[-be+ he is entitl$ to a he>ty sympa?y & respect4 ,bo? s]vility & arrogance are ung5tlemanly4 ,g5tl5ess1 simplicity & a s9c]e reg>d = ! rights ( "o's companions are ! di/+ui%+ m>ks ( a f9e "*4 ,,! ,,dang] ,,( ,,intol]ance ,!re is no room = intol]ance 9 ! social _w4 ,to be honor$1 respect$1 "o mu/ h a c]ta9 fri5dl9ess ( _s4 ,! g5tleman1 ! lady treats ev]yone1 f ! l[lie/ begg> to ! mo/ di/+ui%$ p]sonage ) consid]ation4 ,x is only ! man :o is unpret5ti\s1 :o is always eag] to please1 :o is z c\rte\s & consid]ate 9 mann] to 8 inf]iors z to 8 equals1 t fully des]ves ! "n ( g5tleman4 ,! au?or rec5tly *anc$ to witness an amus+ incid5t :i* might be ( value to repeat "h4 ,x %[s =cibly h[ important ! little ?+s are1 & h[ !y reveal to ! gaze ( ! _w ! true /ory ( our actual wor?3 ,an eld]ly man1 :o %[$ q obvi\sly by 8 lordly & self-satisfi$ mann] t he 0 accu/om$ to travel ab\t 9 8 own c>1 0 on "o occasion =c$ to ride home 9 ! subway4 ,x 0 ru% h\r1 & ?\s&s ( tir$ m5 & wom5 7 9 a hurry to get home4 ,! man impati5tly wait$ 8 turn on a long l9e at ! ticket (fice1 con/antly grumbl+ & mak+ x disagreeable = ^? ab\t him4 ,:5 he f9ally did rea* ! w9d[1 he (f]$ a t5 doll> bill 9 paym5t = "o five-c5t ticket & delib]ately rema9$ at ! w9d[ c\nt+ & rec\nt+ 8 *ange :ile ! p beh9d him anxi\sly await$ _! turn4 ,:5 at la/ he did move away1 he _h a half smile1 half fr[n ( smug & malici\s satisfaction on 8 face :i*1 int]pret$ to ! p he _h kept wait+1 said t he n[ felt repaid = hav+ _h to travel 9 ! same tra9 ) !m4 ,?is man1 9 spite ( 8 self-satisfi$ mann] & well-tailor$ suit1 0 v f> f be+ a g5tleman4 ,! %abby "y man beh9d him1 :o also (f]$ a bill 9 paym5t = 8 ticket1 b /epp$ quickly to "o side to c\nt 8 *ange1 & smil$ *e]fully at ! man beh9d him1 0 inf9itely m ( a g5tleman ?an ! "o :o malici\sly1 & ) evid5t ke5 enjoym5t1 kept ! long l9e wait+4 ,! true wor? ( a g5tleman is reveal$1 n 9 8 fa%ionable clo!s or haughty demeanor1 b 9 8 reg>d = ! rights ( o!rs4 ,x is ! little k9dnesses t c\nt--& ! in/9ctive recognition ( ! rights ( o!rs4 ,z ,engl&'s inimitable ,j4 ,m4 ,b>rie has s aptly rem>k$1 ,^? :o br+ sun%9e to ! lives ( o!rs _c keep x f !mselves4 ,,:y ,,x ,,pays ,,to ,,be ,,agreeable ,:y %\ld we "k ! laws ( etiquette8 ,:y %\ld we "k ! way to d & say ?+s8 ,:y %\ld we be agreeable8 ,^! are que/ions t w und\bt$ly arise 9 ! m9d ( ! "y man or woman :o is eag] to cultivate & ref9e 8 or h] mann] & spee*4 ,! answ] is3 to make "o's own life happi]--to br+ into x a new sun%9e1 a new joy ( liv+ t 0 n ev5 dream$ ( :5 ! m9d & _s 7 %r\d$ 9 ! gloom ( disc\rtesy1 co>s5ess & vulg>ity4 ,= h[ c ! boor be happy8 ,) 8 gloomy face1 s\r disposition1 compla9+ habits & inh]5t lack ( good ta/e & culture1 he sees only ! %ad[s ( life4 ,p are repuls$ by him1 nev] attract$4 ,brilliant m5 & wom51 p ( ref9em5t & ta/e1 w h no?+ to d ) him4 ,he lives 8 own life--8 ill-br$1 compla9+1 gloomy1 companionless life--an outca/ f t bett] society ( :i* we all long to be a "p4 ,culture & *e] g h&-9-h&4 ,! cultur$ man or woman is always *e]ful1 always f9d+ some?+ good & beautiful 9 all mank9d & nature4 ,*e]fulness itself means poise--a :olesome1 happy1 undaunt$ poise t makes life well-balanc$ & wor? ! liv+4 ,! p]son ( l[1 vulg> ta/es & desires is seldom cont5t$1 seldom happy4 ,he f9ds ev]y:]e evil1 ugl9ess1 selfi%ness1 & a t5d5cy = ! _w g5]ally to degrade itself to ! l[] levels ( co>s5ess4 ,he f9ds x because he looks = x4 ,& he looks = x because x already exi/s 9 8 m9d4 ,& yet1 he may be educat$2 he may be a recogniz$ p[] 9 ! f9ancial _w2 he may ev5 possess enviable tal5ts4 ,b if he lacks t glori\s op5-he>t$ g5]osity1 t s9c]e sympa?y & simple und]/&+ ) all mank9d1 t helpful1 heal?ful1 ev]-inspir+ agreeabl5ess ( m9d & _s--! _w w h none ( him4 ,! man :o feels con/antly griev$ & injur$ at "s inju/ice1 real or imag9>y1 is sacrific+ "s ( ! be/ ?+s life has to (f]4 ,he does n "k :at x means to be greet$ ) a smile ( pleasure & a w>m h&clasp4 ,he does n "k :at x means to be tak5 :ole-he>t$ly into "o's confid5ce1 to be reli$ ^u1 to be appeal$ to4 ,he does n "k :at x means1 9 8 h\rs ( d>ke/ adv]sity1 to receive ! g5u9e sympa?y & enc\ragem5t ( a fri5d4 ,b ) culture1 ) developm5t ( m9d & _s1 ) ! desire to adh]e truly to society's laws & reg>d z inviolable ! rights ( o!rs1 !re comes a new und]/&+ ( human relation%ip4 ,:]e once ev]y?+ seem$ n>r[ & selfi%1 "o n[ sees love & beauty & helpfulness4 ,in/ead ( h>% words & unk9d glances1 !re are words ( *e] & enc\ragem5t1 smiles ( fri5dl9ess & und]/&+4 ,! _w t once seem$ co>se1 %all[ & unpoli%$1 seems n[ /rangely cordial & polite4 ,,! ,,simple/ ,,culture ,yes1 x pays to be agreeable4 ,we are all l huge magnets1 & we t5d to attract ^? ?+s :i* we ourselves s5d out4 ,if we are co>se & unref9$1 we attract to our company ^? p :o are also co>se & unref9$4 ,if we are disagreeable & unm9dful ( ! rights ( o!rs1 !y 9 turn w be disagreeable to u1 & unm9dful ( our rights4 ,& simil>ly1 if we are k9d & agreeable1 we are b\nd to meet & attract p ( ! same k9d4 ,!re is a pretty little /ory ( a woman & a *ild1 9 :i* ! simple fri5dl9ess ( a little girl op5$ ! door = a woman ^: life _h be5 embitt]$ by mu* h>d%ip & disappo9tm5t4 ,%e 0 /roll+ "o day ?r\gh a m\nta9 f>m-h\se4 ,%e did n "k :]e %e 0 go+1 & %e did n c>e4 ,%e j want$ to =get1 =get4 ,%e /opp$ ne> a well & gaz$ angrily ab\t h]1 wond]+ h[ !re c\ld be s mu* peace & quiet 9 a _w t held no?+ b turmoil & he>ta*e = h]4 ,%e 0 an attractive woman1 & h] sm>t clo!s & haughty be>+ 7 a disappo9t+ contra/ to h] sc[l+ face & angry eyes4 ,sudd5ly %e glanc$ d[n4 ,a t9y girl 0 wat*+ h] int5tly--a little girl :o _h liv$ all h] sev5 %ort ye>s 9 ! untutor$ expanse ( ! m\nta9s4 ,! woman 0 annoy$1 & %e did n hesitate to %[ x4 ,:at are y look+ at2 :at d y want8 %e dem&$ irritably4 ,in/ead ( return+ ! fr[n1 ! *ild smil$ & /epp$ a little clos]4 ,i 0 j ?9k+ h[ pretty y\r face w\ld be if x smil$ in/ead ( fr[n$1 %e answ]$4 ,! woman's face relax$4 ,! bitt] look 9 ! eyes vani%$ & 0 replac$ by a bright new light4 ,! sc[l became a grateful smile1 & ) an impulsive sob ( pure joy1 %e knelt d[n & hugg$ ! little girl :o _h be5 ! fir/ 9 a long "t to speak g5tly to h]1 ! fir/ 9 a long "t to return h] fr[ns ) s9c]e smiles ( fri5dl9ess4 ,& :5 %e f9ally left ! little *ild1 & return$ to ! exact+ conv5tionalities ( ! t[n1 %e 0 a nobl]1 bett] & f9] woman4 ,! simple he>t ( a *ild :o knew no o!r cre$ or law ?an ! s9c]e love ( all mank9d triumph$ ov] ! bitt]ness ( a woman :o _h kn[n ye>s ( education & worldl9ess4 ,culture is ( ! he>t & _s r ?an ( ! outw>d appe>ance4 ,b x is by :at we d & say t we prove t x truly exi/s )9 u4 ,,*apt] ,,ii ,,etiquette',s ,,rew>d ,,! ,,orig9 ,,( ,,mann]s ,:y d we obs]ve c]ta9 set rules ( conv5tion8 ,:y d we greet p 9 a c]ta9 orda9$ way--by nodd+ or by lift+ ! hat8 ,:y d we make introductions & s5d invitations & cultivate our mann]s & spee*8 ,to f9d ! answ] we mu/ trace civilization back to its v s\rce4 ,"o ( ! fir/ necessities ( ! savage 0 to devise "s means ( %[+ savages ( o!r tribes t he did n mean to fight--t he want$ to live ) !m peaceably4 ,at fir/ x 0 difficult to d ?is2 primeval man 0 always suspici\s1 always wat*ful4 ,he _h to be1 = 8 life dep5d$ ^u x4 ,b sl[ly c]ta9 peaceful obs]vances & signs 7 e/abli%$1 & ! savages began to und]/& !m z greet+s ( peace & good-w4 ,! salutation & greet+ ( to-day is a direct result ( ?is e>ly necessity4 ,?is peace-greet+1 z we %all call x1 0 ! fir/ semblance ( ord]1 ! fir/ tok5 ( good fell[%ip t appe>$ out ( ! primeval *aos ( w>f>e & de/ruction4 ,a c]ta9 greet+1 & ?+s 7 on a peaceful basis4 ,b let t greet+ be =gott51 & ! savage's life 0 ! =feit4 ,man develop$1 & ) him develop$ civilization4 ,f t fir/ peace greet+ !re came c]ta9 set salutations1 c]ta9 =ms ( homage t b\nd m5 toge!r 9 mutual protection & fri5dl9ess4 ,!n sl[ly1 out ( ?is fir/ beam ( mann]s1 ?is fir/ bit ( re/ra9t f ! savag]y ( primeval man1 !re 7 creat$ c]ta9 c]emonies4 ,"s 7 weird dances to ! _s ( ! ,sun2 o!rs 7 animal or human sacrifices to "s ,god ( ,fe>2 /ill o!rs 7 /range c]emonies = ! dep>t$ _s ( ! dead4 ,b !y 7 c]emonies--& z su* !y presag$ ! c]emonies ^u :i* all etiquette1 all good mann]s1 are bas$ to-day4 ,we f9d t ! hi/ory ( mann]s keeps pace ) ! hi/ory & evolution ( man4 ,& we f9d t mann]s1 or c]emonies1 or respect = fell[m5--or :atev] y want to call x--0 ! fir/ tie t b\nd m5 toge!r4 ,x is ! f\ndation ^u :i* all civilization is built4 ,,! ,,mann]s ,,( ,,to-,,day ,c]ta9 s5sible rules ( etiquette h come d[n to u f "o g5]ation to ano!r4 ,to-day only ^? t h /ood ! te/ ( "t are respect$ & obs]v$4 ,!y h be5 sil5tly adopt$ by ! common cons5t ( ! be/ circles 9 ,am]ica & ,europe2 & only ^? :o foll[ !m fai?fully c hope to be successful 9 bus9ess & 9 social life4 ,!re are "s p :o say t etiquette1 t mann]s1 are petty %ams t poli% ! surface ) ! gilt edge ( hypocrisy4 ,we all "k t a few p believe ?is4 ,:o ( u has n he>d ! uncultur$ boor boa/ t he is n re/rict$ by any sissy mann]s8 ,:o ( u has n he>d ! successful bus9ess man decl9e an invitation to a reception because he _h no "t = su* nons5se8 ,to a great _m p mann]s mean no?+ b nons5se2 b y w f9d t !y are almo/ inv>iably p :o nev] w9 social or bus9ess di/9ction4 ,! rules ( etiquette z we obs]ve !m n[adays are n1 z "s p suppose1 ! dictates ( fa%ions4 ,!y are c]ta9 =ms ( address1 c]ta9 conduct ( spee* & mann]1 t h be5 br\ght d[n to u ?r\gh c5turies ( develop+ culture4 ,& we obs]ve !m to-day because !y make contact 9 social life easi] & m agreeable2 !y make life m beautiful & impressive4 ,y d n h to obs]ve ! laws ( good conduct if y d n wi% to4 ,c]ta9ly n4 ,y may d j z y please1 say j :at y please1 & we> j :at y please4 ,b ( c\rse y mu/ n compla9 :5 y f9d ! doors ( good society clos$ aga9/ y1 :5 y f9d t p ( good mann]s & correct social conduct avoid y & b> y f _! activities4 ,good mann]s is ! only key t w op5 ! door to social success--& m5 & wom5 (t5 f9d t x fits ! door to bus9ess success z well4 ,,good ,,society ,,9 ,,am]ica ,ev]yone loves to m+le ) cultur$1 well-br$ p2 ) brilliant & celebrat$ individuals4 ,ev]yone loves to att5d elaborate social functions :]e ! gay g[ns ( beautiful wom5 are only less *>m+ & impressive ?an _! faultless mann]s4 ,b x is n ev]yone :o c be admitt$ to ^! inn] portals ( good society4 ,x is a well-kn[n tru? t mann]s r ?an weal? decide social rank4 ,a man may be fabul\sly weal?y1 b if he does n "k h[ to act1 h[ to dress & speak1 he w n be respect$4 ,am]ican society has rules ( its own1 & ^? :o are n will+ to le>n ^! laws are %unn$1 bani%$4 ,etiquette is ! wall :i* divides ! cultur$ f ! uncultur$1 :i* keeps ! ill-br$ out ( ! circles :]e !y w\ld be awkw>d & uncom=table1 & :]e !y w\ld und\bt$ly cause mortification to o!rs4 ,on ! o!r h&1 to "k ^! rules ( good conduct is to be admitt$ to ! highe/ circles ( society4 ,to "k t "o is correct bani%es at once all unc]ta9ty1 all emb>rassm5t4 ,& "o m+les ) p]fectly-mann]$ p1 calm 9 ! assurance t "o kn[s j :at is correct1 & t no matt] :at happ5s "o c d or say no?+ to reflect on "o's bre$+4 ,,! ,,true ,,lady ,,& ,,g5tleman ,x is n en\gh to be weal?y4 ,x is n en\gh to be widely fam$4 ,b if "o is well-mann]$1 if "o kn[s h[ to conduct oneself ) poise1 grace & self-confid5ce1 "o w w9 respect & honor no matt] :]e "o *ances to be4 ,!re are v few m5 inde$ :o d n value good mann]s4 ,!y may ridicule !m1 !y may despise !m--b deep d[n 9 _! he>ts !y "k t good mann]s h a c]ta9 *>m1 a c]ta9 p[]1 t weal? & fame toge!r d n possess4 ,!y "k t "r 9 _! own bus9ess sph]es !re are m5 :o owe _! success & position to ! appe>ance t !y make1 to ! mann] 9 :i* !y conduct !mselves4 ,& !y "k t !re are beautiful wom5 :o are coldly repell5t2 :ile "s pla9 wom5 w9 ! he>ts ( ev]yone ) :om !y come 9 contact1 m]ely by ! *>m ( _! mann]s4 ,! p]fect g5tleman is n ! dude1 ! ov]-dress$ d&y :o disda9s ! work+man 9 8 pat*$ clo!s & :o sniffs contemptu\sly at ! ^w "w4 ,! true g5tleman is k9dly1 c\rage\s1 civil4 ,he is k9d to ev]yone--to ! tott]+ old man he helps across ! /reet1 & to ! mis*iev\s "y rascal :o ?r[s a ball ?r\gh 8 w9d[4 ,he does n "k :at x is to become angry1 to lose control ( 8 temp]1 to speak disc\rte\sly4 ,he nev] %[s t he is emb>rass$ or ill at ease4 ,he is z calm & unconc]n$ 9 ! pres5ce ( a _w-wide celebrity z he is :5 he is ) 8 mo/ intimate fri5d4 ,nor is he ev] bitt]1 haughty or arrogant4 ,& he is z f> f be+ effem9ate z he is f be+ co>se & brutal4 ,9 %ort1 he kn[s ! mann]s ( good society & he does n hesitate to use !m4 ,! p]fect lady is n ! ornam5tal butt]fly ( society1 z s _m w\ld h u believe4 ,%e is g5tle1 & well-dress$ & graceful--n m]ely ornam5tal4 ,%e does "s useful "w1 no matt] :at x is4 ,%e is pati5t always1 & g5]\s4 ,%e nev] speaks h>%ly to tradespeople or to s]vants2 g5tl5ess & res]ve are ! v keynotes ( h] mann]4 ,%e is nev] haughty1 nev] sup]ior4 ,%e is k9d & c\rte\s to ev]yone1 & %e conducts h]self ) ! calm1 unassum+ grace t in/9ctively w9s a responsive respect4 ,9 h] mann] t[>ds m5 %e is res]v$1 mode/4 ,b %e is self-reliant & n afraid to ass]t h]self4 ,h] spee* & mann] are *>act]iz$ always by dignity1 repose & self-confid5ce4 ,x is only by kn[+ ! laws ( good conduct1 & by foll[+ !m fai?fully1 t "o c hope ev] to become a true g5tleman or true lady4 ,,! ,,secret ,,( ,,social ,,success ,e man :o s wi%es may become a g5tleman1 & e woman may become a lady 9 e s5se ( ! ^w4 ,x requires only ! cultivation ( ^? qualities outl9$ above4 ,& x is "h t ! use ( etiquette lies1 t ! importance ( good mann]s is mo/ /rik+ly portray$4 ,etiquette tea*es y h[ to be g5tle1 calm1 pati5t4 ,x tells y h[ to be at ease among /rang]s4 ,x tells y h[ to cultivate grace1 poise1 self-confid5ce4 ,n only does x tell y h[1 b x gives y poise & self-confid5ce4 ,by tea*+ y ! "r ?+ to d at ! "r "t1 x elim9ates all possibility ( mi/akes--& h5ce all emb>rassm5t & awkw>dness vani%4 ,! exi/5ce ( ^! fix$ social laws1 ^! little rules ( etiquette1 makes x easy = ! man & woman :o h n be5 br$ 9 ! be/ society1 to ma/] ! k :i* w enable !m to ent] t society & m+le ) ! mo/ highly cultivat$ p )\t feel+ emb>rass$ or uncom=table4 ,x te>s d[n ! b>ri]s betwe5 ! weal?y & ! poor1 betwe5 ! educat$ & ! ignorant4 ,by kn[+ :at to d & say & write & we> on all occasions1 "u all conditions1 any man or woman c ent] any society & m+le ) any p4 ,! old prov]b might well be *ang$ to read1 ,culture makes ! :ole _w k96 ,( c\rse if a man sudd5ly became weal?y & he wi%$ to ent] ! highe/ society1 8 weal? might s]ve z an op5+4 ,b he w\ld soon f9d t money 0 n en\gh--t he ne$$ mann]s4 ,he might m+le ) society = ye>s1 sl[ly acquir+ ! correct table mann]s1 ! correct mode ( address1 ! correct mann] ( mak+ introductions1 ! correct way to conduct himself at all times1 9 all places4 ,b x w\ld take _m ye>s be=e ! r\gh edges ( 8 previ\s uncultivat$ mann]s 7 rubb$ away4 ,in/ead ( wait+ = ye>s ( contact ) cultur$ p to br+ him ! correct mann]s befitt+ a man ( weal?1 he ne$ only le>n at once f a dep5dable au?ority ! etiquette ( society1 ! good =m t has be5 cry/alliz$ into rules aft] ye>s ( social int]c\rse4 ,x is ! easie/ road to social success4 ,,:at ,,mann]s ,,w ,,d ,,= ,,y ,e day y come into contact ) p1 ) /rang]s1 :o judge y by :at y d & say4 ,!y g away c>ry+ an impression ( y--& x dep5ds ^u y\r mann]s :e!r x is a good impression or a bad impression4 ,x is a mi/ake to ?9k t good mann]s are meant = ! elaborate ball room or = ! =mal d9n]4 ,society is n necess>ily too =mal or too %[y4 ,society implies also t society ( fell[-m5 y meet e day ( ! ye>--p y come into contact ) 9 ! social & bus9ess worlds4 ,& 9 ord] to make contact ) ^! p agreeable & pleasant1 9 ord] to w9 ! admiration & respect ( /rang]s1 9 ord] to avoid emb>rassm5t & humiliation because ( bad blund]s at mo/ conspicu\s mom5ts1 x is ess5tial to "k :at is "r & :at is wrong4 ,good mann]s w enable y to be easy & graceful at all times4 ,y w be able to m+le ) ! mo/ cultur$ p & be p]fectly at ease4 ,y w lose all self-consci\sness1 all timidity4 ,& in/ead y w become dignifi$1 well-pois$1 calm4 ,in/9ctively p w respect y2 9 bus9ess & 9 society y w f9d y\rself welcom$ & admir$4 ,,etiquette',s ,,rew>d ,etiquette is l ! b9d+ ( a book--j z ! b9d+ reveals ! "n ( ! book1 & protects ! valuable pages t are inside1 s does etiquette reveal ! bre$+ & culture ( an individual1 & protects him f ! disrespect1 ridicule & snubs ( ! _w4 ,etiquette w make y dignifi$4 ,x w make y\r actions & spee* ref9$1 poli%$1 impressive4 ,x w make y a lead] in/ead ( a foll[]1 a p>ticipant in/ead ( a look]-on4 ,x w op5 ! doors ( ! highe/ society to y1 make y immune to all emb>rassm5t1 enable y to conduct y\rself ) ease & confid5ce at all times1 "u all circum/ances4 ,! rew>ds ( etiquette are too num]\s to rec\nt4 ,if y foll[ ! laws ( good conduct1 if y d only :at is "r & 9 good =m1 y w f9d y\rself an ackn[l$g$ lead]1 an ackn[l$g$ success1 no matt] 9 :at /ation ( life y may be4 ,! _w is quick to p]ceive good mann]s1 j z x is quick to p]ceive ! blund]s 9 etiquette4 ,if y /udy ! rules ( good conduct1 & foll[ good =m 9 ev]y?+ y d & say1 y w become c\rte\s & k9d & well-mann]$4 ,etiquette w attract p to y1 make y & y\r home a c5t] ( social activity4 ,b mo/ ( all1 x w make y respect y\rself4 ,& t is m important ?an ri*es or fame--= self-respect is ! only ?+ t br+s true happ9ess4 ,rememb] ! words ( ! prophet1 ,he :o respects himself w e>n ! respect ( all ! _w4 ,,*apt] ,,iii ,,engagem5ts ,,( ,,special ,,importance ,!re is p]haps no "t :5 ! rules ( etiquette ne$ to be s /rictly obs]v$ z dur+ ! p]iod ( c\rt%ip4 ,all ! _w loves a lov]--b ?is does n keep ! _w f wat*+ closely & criticiz+ sev]ely any brea* ( good mann]s1 especially on ! "p ( ! "y lady4 ,any public display ( affection any:]e at any "t is grossly unref9$4 ,love is sacr$1 & x %\ld n be ?r[n op5 to ! rude comm5ts ( /rang]s4 ,! "y c\ple %\ld conduct !mselves ) quiet dignity & res]ve1 nei!r indulg+ 9 t]ms ( ende>m5t or c>esses1 nor purposely ignor+ ea* o!r s z to create ! impression t !y are n1 aft] all1 s v mu* 9 love4 ,!re is no reason :y _! conduct 9 public aft] !y are engag$ %\ld be any m demon/rative ?an x 0 be=e4 ,at p>ties1 d9n]s1 & o!r ent]ta9m5ts x is _! privilege to be ) ea* o!r m ?an !y are ) anyone else1 b ?is does n mean t !y %\ld neglect ! o!r gue/s4 ,if ! occasion has be5 plann$ especially = !m !y are 9 "p responsible = ea* "o pres5t f9d+ x an enjoyable "o4 ,& ea* "o %\ld be v cordial to ! fri5ds ( ! o!r4 ,_m an engagem5t t held promise ( gold5 happ9ess to come 0 abruptly brok5 because "o or ! o!r 0 n suffici5tly circumspect 9 conduct4 ,a "y lady mu/ rememb] t :ile %e is n exactly expect$ to give up indiscrim9ately all h] fri5ds ( ! opposite sex1 %e mu/ n receive !m z gue/s1 or g to ! !at] or ball ) !m1 )\t ! k & cons5t ( h] fianc4 ,he is1 ( c\rse1 expect$ to be equally consid]ate ( h] ) reg>d to 8 own relations ) o!r wom54 ,! engag$ c\ple ( to-day enjoys mu* great] fre$om ?an ! engag$ c\ple ( our gr&mo!rs' "t4 ,! *ap]on has be5 almo/ entirely disp5s$ )1 except 9 a few individual cases4 ,al?\gh x is /ill consid]$ r poor =m to att5d ! !at] or op]a toge!r1 )\t o!r fri5ds 9 ! p>ty1 x is (t5 done )\t any v s]i\s consequ5ce to ! "y p4 ,p]haps x is because ! "y m5 & wom5 ( ?is c\ntry h t in/9ctive grace & dignity ( mann] t ! sev]e laws ( conduct practic$ abroad h be5 deem$ unnecess>y4 ,,! ,,proposal ,at "o "t1 n s v long ago1 x 0 consid]$ an irrevocable law ( etiquette t a "y man obta9 ! =mal cons5t ( a "y lady's p>5ts be=e ask+ h] h& 9 m>riage4 ,preval5t cu/oms h almo/ elim9at$ ?is =mality1 & mod]n mo!rs & fa!rs1 by ! welcome :i* !y accord him 9 _! home1 %[ a "y man :e!r or n !y ?9k him eligible = _! daught]'s h&4 ,& x is really a mu* wis] plan to object to a fri5d%ip :5 x fir/ beg9s in/ead ( wait+ until x has develop$ into some?+ m s]i\s4 ,if ! "y man wi%es to proce$ ^u ! old-fa%ion$ =mula he may d s1 fir/ assur+ himself ins(> z he is able t 8 att5tions are welcome to ! "y lady4 ,! "t = ! proposal dep5ds ^u att5d+ circum/ances4 ,someone has said t !re w\ld be few] divorces if m proposals 7 made 9 ! middle ( ! day "u ord9>y conditions1 b ! timid or romantic y\? usually pref]s ! wit*]y ( moonlight & ! magic ( solitude4 ,! proposal itself %\ld be s9c]e & e>ne/4 ,gl[+ t]ms & impassion$ emotion are1 inde$1 v bad ta/e2 & (t5 ! m simple a proposal is ! m =cibly x expresses ! suitor's ardor4 ,if he is accept$ ! well-br$ "y man w imm$iately seek ! "y lady's p>5ts & imp>t ! happy news to !m4 ,at ?is po9t1 if x has n already be5 disclos$ x is cu/om>y = him to reveal 8 true /atus1 f9ancially & socially1 & answ] politely any que/ions t h] p>5ts may ask him4 ,if !re are diss5sions he mu/ expla9 calmly & c>efully1 mak+ sure all ! "t to keep complete control ( 8 feel+s & n to all[ himself to become ei!r angry or impati5t4 ,,! ,,engagem5t ,,r+ ,x is ! cu/om to seal ! engagem5t pact ) a r+4 ,z soon z ! prospective bridegroom has won ! cons5t ( ! "y lady :om he wi%es to be 8 wife1 he places ! engagem5t r+ on ! ?ird f+] ( h] left h&4 ,! conv5tion is t ! r+ be a diamond solitaire set 9 gold or plat9um1 or1 if x is pref]r$1 a diamond set ) o!r /ones4 ,x is always wise to consult ! individual pref]5ce ( ! "y lady 9 det]m9+ ! *oice ( ! r+1 & x is h] privilege to *oose :atev] k9d %e wants reg>dless ( tradition or conv5tion4 ,,ann\nc+ ,,! ,,engagem5t ,aft] ! proposal has be5 accept$ ann\ncem5t ( ! fact is made1 & x is "h t ! "y lady takes ! lead+ "p4 ,!re are sev]al e/abli%$ conv5tions 9 ann\nc+ ! engagem5t4 ,ea* "o is good =m1 & ! *oice is m]ely a matt] ( ta/e & conv5i5ce4 ,b always ! initiative mu/ come f ! family ( ! future bride4 ,! "y man mu/ n ev5 ann\nce ! engagem5t to 8 be/ fri5ds until he is q sure t 8 fianc has already made x kn[n to h] fri5ds4 ,x has always be5 a popul> cu/om 9 bett] society to give ! ann\ncem5t ( an engagem5t z ne>ly an appe>ance ( leak+ out z possible4 ,p]haps x is because x adds to ! int]e/ ( ! occasion4 ,to obta9 ?is effect1 a numb] ( intimate fri5ds & relatives are invit$ to a d9n] p>ty--really ! engagem5t d9n]--:]e1 9 ! c\rse ( ! conv]sation1 ! news ( ! engagem5t is casually imp>t$ to ! gue/s = ! fir/ "t4 ,x is usually ann\nc$ by ! fa!r ( ! "y lady2 sometimes by h] old] bro!r1 & 9 "s cases by h] "m4 ,! gue/s1 ( c\rse1 w (f] w>m & s9c]e congratulations4 ,! happy c\ple m+le among _! gue/s & receive _! good wi%es ) mode/y & smiles ( ?anks4 ,sometimes ! "y lady gives a lun*eon = h] fri5ds1 at :i* ! ann\ncem5t is made4 ,x is always v pretty to make ! ann\ncem5t 9 "s novel way1 & if ! ho/ess does n f9d h] own +5uity equal to x %e w f9d h] /ation] h] be/ guide4 ,he has v>i\s novelty c>ds1 etc41 specially design$ = su* occasions4 ,(t51 in/ead ( =mally ann\nc+ ! engagem5t1 ! "y lady gives ! news to sev]al ( h] close/ fri5ds1 dep5d+ on !m to spread x among _! fri5ds & acqua9tances4 ,?is mann] ( ann\ncem5t is usually foll[$ ) a little in=mal reception1 to :i* are invit$ ! memb]s ( ! prospective bridegroom's family & ! relatives ( bo? families4 ,,! ,,mo/ ,,usual ,,me?od ,p]haps ! be/ way to ann\nce an engagem5t is = ! "y lady & h] "m to s5d small engrav$ c>ds to _! circle ( fri5ds & relatives1 mak+ ! ann\ncem5t 9 a simple /atem5t1 & m5tion+ an aft]noon :5 !y w be at home to visitors4 ,! "y man may also s5d notes or c>ds to 8 fri5ds1 hav+ fir/ made sure t 8 fianc has already ann\nc$ x to h] fri5ds4 ,! at home (f]s a spl5did opportunity = ea* "o to meet ! fri5ds ( ! o!r1 & = ! families ( ! two "y p to become bett] acqua9t$4 ,c>e mu/ be tak5 t !re is no con/ra9t1 no drift+ into circles4 ,! "y lady mu/ welcome h] future husb&'s fri5ds ) s9c]e cordiality1 & see t !y are prop]ly introduc$ to h] own fri5ds4 ,he mu/ m+le ) h] fri5ds & make himself companionable & agreeable4 ,to be con/antly toge!r1 selfi%ly enjoy+ ea* o!r's company :ile ! neglect$ gue/s are left to _! own devices is a brea* ( etiquette & mu/ be consci5ti\sly avoid$ if ! at home is to be hail$ a success4 ,if ?is la/ me?od ( ann\nc+ ! engagem5t is decid$ ^u1 ! home %\ld boa/ no decorations except fl[]s simply arrang$4 ,! "y lady & h] "m1 9 cons]vative aft]noon frocks1 receive toge!r4 ,! "y man is usually pres5t$ to ! gue/s by 8 future fa!r-9-law4 ,ent]ta9m5t1 su* z music & danc+1 may be provid$ = ! occasion if x is conv5i5t4 ,simple refre%m5ts may be s]v$--da9ty s&wi*es1 cake1 tea & sweets are appropriate :5 s]v$ 9 an attractive mann]4 ,x is also cu/om>y to place an ann\ncem5t 9 ! society columns ( ! newspap]s simultane\sly ) ! giv+ ( ! d9n] p>ty4 ,x %\ld always be writt5 by ! p>5ts ab\t _! daught]1 or by ! gu>dian if %e has no p>5ts--nev] by ! engag$ girl h]self4 ,,ann\nc+ ,,an ,,engagem5t ,,9 ,,! ,,newspap]s ,! vogue to-day seems to favor ann\nc+ engagem5ts 9 ! newspap] r ?an ?r\gh ! issu+ ( ann\ncem5t c>ds4 ,su* items ( ann\ncem5t %\ld be s5t to ! society editor ( ! pap] select$1 & %\ld be sign$ ) ! full "n & address ( ! s5d]4 ,brief items are always bett] ?an long ones4 ,"h are two typical newspap] ann\ncem5ts ( rec5t engagem5ts3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h5ry ,m4 ,b[] ann\nce ! engagem5t ( _! daught] ,rose to ,mr4 ,walt] ,b>rie ( ,bo/on4 ,! date ( ! w$d+ w be ann\nc$ 9 ?is pap] lat]4 ,! engagem5t ( ,miss ,lillian ,hall to ,mr4 ,rob]t ,g4 ,mann+ is ann\nc$ by ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,b4 ,hall4 ,! w$d+ is to take place 9 ,/4 ,?omas's ,*ur* on ! #ae? ( ,june4 ,,engagem5t ,,gifts ,x is n cu/om>y = elaborate engagem5t gifts to be pres5t$1 ev5 by ne> relatives4 ,9 fact1 ! mode ( ! engagem5t gift has be5 gradually disappe>+ until to-day congratulations are consid]$ suffici5t4 ,h[ev]1 ! close fri5ds ( ! "y lady may s5d h]1 ) _! congratulations1 pleas+ bits ( *9aw>e1 glassw>e1 & sometimes ev5 silv]4 ,odd pieces ( bric--brac & qua9t1 unusual gifts1 & antiques are always acceptable4 ,m>k+s on gifts are usually 9 ! maid5 "n ( ! bride--b if any d\bt is felt z to :i* %e h]self w\ld pref]1 x is be/ to ask h]4 ,!re is an old tradition reg>d+ ! giv+ ( tea-cups z an engagem5t pres5t4 ,a lov]1 :o 0 oblig$ to g away on an ext5d$ sea j\rney1 gave to 8 betro!d a delicate *9a cup1 ask+ h] to dr9k tea f x e aft]noon4 ,he said1 ,if ,i am unfai?ful1 ! cup w fill to ov]brimm+ & ! tea p\r+ ov] ! sides w crack ! ?9 *9a4 ,!n y w "k ,i h brok5 fai?4 ,! cu/om has be5 br\ght d[n to u1 & n[ we f9d t ! giv+ ( a tea-cup or a tea-set z an engagem5t pres5t signifies fai?fulness--& x may mean fai?fulness to fri5d%ip or love z ! case may be4 ,we usually f9d t a "y lady's sp9/] fri5ds are p>tial to ! cu/om2 !y seem to f9d p>ticul> enjoym5t 9 pres5t+ h] ) da9ty tea-cups1 ei!r sep>ately or 9 sets4 ,exp5sive gifts %\ld nev] be ex*ang$ dur+ an engagem5t1 b>r+ ( c\rse ! engagem5t r+4 ,! "y man may pres5t 8 prospective bride ) books1 fl[]s or c&y1 b articles ( we>+ app>el are consid]$ bad ta/e4 ,to be mode/1 graci\s1 dignifi$ dur+ ! engagem5t1 to cont9ue "o's social duties fai?fully1 nei!r neglect+ "o's fri5ds nor becom+ self-consci\sly en?usia/ic1 to be self-possess$ & unaffect$ ev5 :ile "o is ! c5t] ( mu* lively int]e/ & animat$ discussion--?is is ! end to be desir$1 & ! "y man & woman :o h accompli%$ x are inde$ =tunate4 ,,bridal ,,%[]s ,a good _m ye>s ago a fri5d ( a "y woman :o 0 ab\t to be m>ri$ decid$ t ! only gift %e c\ld af=d 0 too slight an (f]+ to express ! love & good wi%es t %e felt4 ,kn[+ t !re 7 o!r fri5ds :o felt ! same way %e call$ !m toge!r & sugge/$ t !y pres5t _! gifts at ! same "t4 ,!n & !re ! idea ( ! %[] 0 born4 ,! cu/om has prevail$ & 9 mo/ in/ances to-day ! %[] has a special purpose1 su* z ! l95 %[] or ! kit*5 %[] or ! book %[]4 ,x is a v *>m+ way ( pres5t+ gifts t w\ld seem too trifl+ if !y 7 pres5t$ alone4 ,intimate fri5ds ( ! bride are ! gue/s at a %[]4 ,x is usually a v in=mal affair & ne>ly always a surprise to ! bride4 ,! gifts may be hidd5 9 a ,jack ,horn] pie1 !y may be wrapp$ 9 all sorts ( odd packages1 or !y may be pres5t$ 9 any ( a hundr$ & "o attractive ways4 ,orig9ality 9 ?is1 z 9 all ent]ta9m5ts1 is greatly to be desir$4 ,! "y lady :o is honor$ ) a %[] ?anks ! gue/s v]bally1 & aft]w>ds %e may write ea* ( !m a little note express+ h] gratitude4 ,x is necess>y to d s if ! affair 0 an elaborate "o & ! gifts 7 exp5sive4 ,,l5g? ,,( ,,! ,,engagem5t ,! "q ( h[ long an engagem5t %\ld la/ is usually gov]n$ by att5dant conditions4 ,!re is1 h[ev]1 a m>k$ t5d5cy = engagem5ts to be %ort2 9 fact1 fa%ion n[ dem&s t ! w$d+-day be at lea/ t5tatively fix$ be=e ! engagem5t is ann\nc$4 ,_m times !re are excell5t reasons :y x %\ld be ( sev]al ye>s' duration4 ,x is be/ n to ann\nce ! fact =mally1 ?\gh x may be und]/ood among "o's fri5ds4 ,matt]s ( ?is k9d are to be det]m9$ by ! two p :o are mo/ conc]n$1 & if a "y man & 8 fianc h decid$ t !y w\ld l to h a long engagem5t ! rules ( etiquette h no?+ to say aga9/ x4 ,,responsibility ,,= ,,! ,,w$d+ ,! fa!r & "m ( ! "y lady :o is ab\t to be m>ri$ assume all responsibility = ! prep>ation = & ! celebration ( ! w$d+4 ,! groom is n expect$ to pay = any?+ except ! r+ & fl[]s = ! bride &1 if he wi%es1 ! fl[]s = ! bridesmaids & trifl+ gifts = ! u%]s & o!r att5dants4 ,! cl]gyman's fee also devolves ^u him1 b all o!r exp5ses are paid by ! bride's p>5ts or gu>dians4 ,inde$1 x w\ld indicate a great lack ( tact or delicacy on ! "p ( ! groom to (f] to provide a "p ( ! tr\sseau or to pay = any ( ! o!r exp5ses incid5tal to ! occasion4 ,ann\ncem5t c>ds1 invitations1 music1 fl[]s & o!r decorations = ! *ur*1 ! prep>ations = ! breakfa/ or reception to foll[ ! c]emony--all ( ^! are paid = by h] p>5ts4 ,! w$d+ %\ld nev] be m elaborate ?an ! p>5ts ( ! bride c af=d4 ,,families ,,& ,,fri5ds ,x is always v delightful :5 ! families ( an engag$ c\ple f9d !mselves cong5ial1 & e ef=t %\ld be made by ! "y p to br+ ab\t1 if x does n already exi/1 a h>moni\s relation%ip betwe5 _! imm$iate families4 ,x is almo/ equally desirable t ea* %all l ! fri5ds ( ! o!r & h]oic ef=ts mu/ be made to d s4 ,a pleas+ way to br+ fri5ds toge!r is by means ( an in=mal reception4 ,! invitations %\ld be cordial notes writt5 by h&4 ,! foll[+ indicates ! usual =m3 ,bayside1 ,april #d1 #ai-- ,de> ,may3 ,no d\bt y already "k t ,i am engag$ to be m>ri$ to ,ralph ,curran4 ,?ursday aft]noon f ?ree to five "m is giv+ a little reception = 8 fri5ds & m9e1 & we bo? hope t y w be able to att5d4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,hel5 ,hall4 ,= ! memb]s ( ! imm$iate families or = v close fri5ds a d9n] is sugge/$ b ! mo/ important po9t = ! family :i* is do+ ! ent]ta9+ to keep 9 m9d is ! /yle ( liv+ to :i* ! o!r has be5 accu/om$1 & no?+ %\ld be done :i* might emb>rass !m4 ,if ! family has be5 accu/om$ to great elegance ! "o t is act+ z ho/ ne$ h no fe> = p :o are wor? kn[+ appreciate simplicity :]ev] !y f9d x2 b if !y are 9 v mod]ate circum/ances x is ! cruelle/ k9d ( disc\rtesy to attempt to ov]awe !m ) c]emoni\s hospitality4 ,x is ord9>ily ! family ( ! groom t is fir/ to approa* ! o!r ) an invitation ( "s k9d1 b ext5uat+ circum/ances make ! conv5tion v>y4 ,(t5 a "y girl is invit$ to visit 9 ! home ( h] fianc be=e h] m>riage4 ,x is an invitation :i* %e may accept ) p]fect propriety4 ,,*apt] ,,iv ,,w$d+ ,,invitations ,,& ,,ann\ncem5ts ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,invitation ,n lat] ?an fifte5 days1 & n e>li] ?an f\r weeks be=e ! date set = ! m>riage1 w$d+ invitations are s5t to ^? fri5ds1 relatives & acqua9tances :o are to be pres5t at ! c]emony4 ,:5 ! w$d+ is to be a l>ge *ur* affair1 invitations are s5t to all ^? ^: names appe> on ! visit+ li/s ( ! two families4 ,!y are also issu$ to relatives & fri5ds ( ! bride & groom :o may be travel+ abroad1 to ! important bus9ess associates ( ! groom1 & ^? ( ! bride's fa!r4 ,intimate fri5ds & relatives 9 m\rn+ are also invit$1 :e!r !y are expect$ to att5d or n4 ,= a home w$d+1 m discrim9ation is %[n 9 ! issu+ ( invitations4 ,intimate fri5ds & relatives ( bo? families are invit$1 b no casual acqua9tances4 ,9 s5d+ out ! invitations1 ! bride-to-be & h] "m %\ld take into consid]ation ! numb] ( p :o w fit com=tably into ! reception or draw+ room4 ,,size ,,& ,,mat]ial ,=mal w$d+ invitations %\ld always be engrav$4 ,!y are issu$ 9 ! "n ( ! bride's p>5ts1 or1 if %e is an orphan1 9 ! names ( a m>ri$ bro!r & 8 wife1 ( h] gu>dian or h] ne>e/ male relative4 ,pure :ite or cream-t9t$ pap]1 unglaz$ b smoo? 9 surface1 %\ld be us$ = w$d+ invitations4 ,a conv5tional size1 al?\gh ea* ye> sees ano!r size 9 w$d+ invitations1 is sev5 in*es 9 l5g? by six in*es 9 wid?4 ,^! dim5sions v>y1 b nev] m ?an an in* or s4 ,!y fold once into ! envelope4 ,pla9 script is favor$ = ! engrav+ ( ! w$d+ c>ds2 old ,engli% script1 ,roman capitals & block lett]+ are all effective4 ,a good /ation] w %[ y ! types ( lett]+ mo/ suit$ to w$d+ invitations at ! pres5t "t4 ,x is 8 bus9ess to be able to advise y4 ,if !re is a family cre/ 7! bride's family7 x may be emboss$ 9 :ite 9 ! c5t] at ! top ( ! engrav$ %eet1 b n on ! flap ( ! envelope4 ,a rec5t fa%ion is to h ! bride's initials emboss$ 9 :ite :]e ! cre/ w\ld appe>4 ,bo? are effective2 b su* decorations z gilt-edges1 entw9$ lett]s ( coats-(-arms 9 colors are 9 bad ta/e4 ,v f9e pap] %\ld be select$ = ! w$d+ invitation4 ,no t9t except cream may be us$2 pure-:ite is consid]$ ! v be/ =m4 ,! pap] %\ld be ( m$ium weight1 unglaz$1 & smoo?4 ,light-weight pap] ?r\gh :i* lett]+ c be easily se5 %\ld n be us$4 ,nor %\ld ! pap] be s ?ick & heavy t x breaks :5 fold$4 ,,k9ds ,,( ,,envelopes ,! w$d+ invitation dem&s two envelopes4 ,! fir/1 mat*+ 9 texture & quality ! pap] ( ! invitation1 is us$ z a protection = ! c>d4 ,x rema9s unseal$4 ,! second envelope is a trifle l>g]1 ?\gh x mu/ also be ( a simil> texture4 ,into ?is envelope ! c>d & ! inn] envelope are slipp$ = mail+4 ,! l>ge envelope is seal$ & /amp$4 ,x be>s ! complete "n & address ( ! p]son = :om x is int5d$1 :ile ! inn] envelope be>s only ! "n4 ,! *ur* c>ds are enclos$ ) ! w$d+ invitation if !re is necessity = !m4 ,& if !re is to be a w$d+ reception to :i* ?is p>ticul> gue/ is invit$1 a special c>d is also enclos$4 ,! at home c>ds ( ! bridal c\ple are s5t sep>ately aft] ! w$d+4 ,,address+ ,,! ,,envelopes ,! w$d+ invitation is address$ to ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,blank4 ,! expression & family foll[+ ! "n ( a husb& & wife is n us$ 9 polite society4 ,if !re are unm>ri$ daught]s to be invit$1 a sep>ate invitation is address$ to ,! ,misses ,blank4 ,sons may be invit$ ei!r by s5d+ a sep>ate invitation to ea* "o1 or address+ "o invitation to ,! ,messrs4 ,blank4 ,all ^! invitations1 9 _! prop] envelopes1 address$ appropriately1 are plac$ 9 ! l>ge envelope = mail+4 ,?is s+le envelope is address$ 9 full to ! matron ( ! family1 ,mrs4 ,h5ry ,mason ,blank4 ,,invitation ,,to ,,*ur* ,,w$d+ ,! invitation to a *ur* w$d+ is word$ ) a bit m =mality ?an ! invitation to ! home c]emony4 ,x is s5t out two or ?ree weeks be=e ! day set = ! w$d+4 ,! *ur* w$d+ invitation requires no writt5 ackn[l$gm5t1 except 9 ^? r>e cases :5 !re is a reque/ = x4 ,in/ead ( ! initials1 ,r4,s4,v4,p41 x is bett] =m to say simply1 ,please reply4 ,invitations = ! home w$d+1 ( c\rse1 require prompt ackn[l$gm5t4 ,foll[+ are two =ms ( *ur* w$d+ invitations :i* may be us$3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,grey ,taylor reque/ ! honor ( 44444444444444444444444444444 pres5ce at ! m>riage ( _! daught] ,hel5 ,m>ie ) ,mr4 ,raymond ,mit*ell on ,?ursday1 ! n9? ( ,may at f\r o'clock ,/4 ,?omas's ,*ur* ,new ,york ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,grey ,taylor reque/ ! honor ( y\r pres5ce at ! m>riage ( _! daught] ,hel5 ,m>ie & ,mr4 ,raymond ,mit*ell on ,friday1 ! f\r? ( ,june at six o'clock at ! ,presbyt]ian ,*ur* ,bo/on ,9 ! fir/ invitation1 ! "n ( ! gue/ is writt5 by h& 9 ! space left = t purpose4 ,! use ( m>riage & & m>riage ) is n[ cu/om>y 9 pref]5ce to m>riage to4 ,all ?ree words are 9 good =m1 h[ev]1 & any "o ( !m may be us$4 ,bel[ is a model engrav$ admission c>d1 us$ :5 ! *ur* w$d+ is to be a l>ge "o & tickets ( admission are necess>y4 ,! correct size is d5ot$3 ,,please ,,pres5t ,,?is ,,c>d at ,/4 ,mi*ael's ,*ur* on ,monday1 ! fif? ( ,may ,,invitations ,,to ,,home ,,w$d+ ,= ! home w$d+1 invitations are engrav$ z = ! *ur* w$d+1 b = ! phrase reque/ ! honor ( y\r pres5ce ! phrase reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company is sub/itut$1 ?\gh honor may be us$ 9 place ( pleasure if "o pref]s4 ,z 9 ! case ( ! *ur* w$d+1 a space may be left = ! "n ( ! gue/ to be fill$ 91 or ! =m t foll[s may be us$3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,rob]t ,guy ,br[n reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company at ! m>riage ( _! daught] ,hel5 ,rose & ,mr4 ,h5ry ,van ,bur5 on ,tuesday aft]noon1 ,june ! fir/ at f\r o'clock ,tw5ty-two ,we/ ,end ,av5ue ,:5 ! w$d+ takes place 9 ! c\ntry1 or a gue/ at a great di/ance is invit$1 a small c>d l ! "o foll[+ is g5]ally includ$3 ,tra9 leaves ,gr& ,c5tral ,/ation = ,gl5ville at #aa3db ,a4,m4 ,return+ tra9 leaves ,gl5ville = ,new ,york at #f3aj ,p4,m4 ,weal?y p (t5 place a special tra9 at ! disposal ( special city fri5ds ^: pres5ce is eag]ly desir$ at ! w$d+4 ,a c>d1 l ! "o foll[+1 is enclos$ ) ! invitation1 & x s]ves z a pass1 entitl+ ! be>] to a seat 9 ! res]v$ tra94 ,"h is ! =m mo/ g5]ally us$3 ,! special tra9 leaves ,gr& ,c5tral ,/ation = ,gl5ville at #aa3db ,a4,m4 ,leaves ,gl5ville = ,gr& ,c5tral ,/ation at #f3aj ,p4,m4 ,please pres5t ?is c>d at /ation door ,,w$d+ ,,9 ,a ,,fri5d',s ,,home ,sometimes1 ei!r because ( conv5i5ce or p]sonal pref]5ce1 arrangem5ts are made to h a w$d+ take place at ! home ( a fri5d or relative4 ,! foll[+ word+ is sugge/$ z ! correct =m = ! invitation3 ,! pleasure ( y\r company is reque/$ at ! m>riage ( ,miss ,m>ian ,b5son ,joyce to ,mr4 ,john ,h4 ,br[n on ,monday1 ! fif? ( ,june at twelve o'clock at ! resid5ce ( ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h]b]t ,smi? ,hopk9s ,eighte5 ,johns ,/reet ,,:5 ,,c>ds ,,are ,,enclos$ ,:5 a *ur* w$d+ is foll[$ by a reception or breakfa/1 special engrav$ c>ds are enclos$ ) ! invitations to ^? gue/s ^: pres5ce is desir$4 ,x may be a v small c>d1 inscrib$ m]ely ) ^! words3 ,reception f f\r o'clock ,=ty-six ,lafayette ,/reet ,= ! w$d+ breakfa/ a c>d ( ?is k9d is usually enclos$3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,hay reque/ ! pleasure ( 444444444444444444444 company1 at breakfa/ on ,?ursday1 ! fif? ( ,may at twelve o'clock ,,invitations ,,to ,,second ,,m>riages ,! second w$d+ invitation ( a wid[ %\ld be issu$ 9 ! "n ( h] p>5ts or ne>e/ liv+ relatives4 ,%e uses h] own fir/ "n ) ! surname ( ! deceas$ husb&4 ,"h is ! correct =m3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,robb]t ,mann+ reque/ ! honor ( y\r pres5ce at _! m>riage ( _! daught] ,mrs4 ,may ,ellis ,bruce to ,mr4 ,/anley ,k5wor? on ,monday1 ,septemb] ! fif? at six o'clock ,/4 ,paul ,*apel ,x may be t ! woman :o is to be m>ri$ = ! second "t has no ne> relatives to s]ve z ho/s = h]4 ,h] invitations may be l ?is3 ,! honor ( y\r pres5ce is reque/$ at ! m>riage ( ,mrs4 ,hel5 ,roy ,*adwick & ,mr4 ,bruce ,k5ne? on ,w$nesday1 ,augu/ ! t5? at f\r o'clock ,*ur* ( ! ,r$eem] ,ann\ncem5t c>ds are s5t aft] a w$d+ if !re 7 no invitations issu$4 ,!y are (t5 s5t in/ead ( invitations to fri5ds :o live at too great a di/ance to be pres5t at ! c]emony4 ,!y require no ackn[l$gm5t ?\gh x is cu/om>y to s5d ei!r a note express+ good wi%es or a gift ( "s k9d4 ,if "o lives 9 ! same community "o %\ld call on ! bride's "m1 & if ! bride's c>d 9 inclos$1 on ! bride h]self %ortly aft] %e returns f ! honeymoon4 ,?is is ! usual =m = ! ann\ncem5t c>d3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,rog] ,smi? ann\nce ! m>riage ( _! daught] ,rose ,madel9e to ,mr4 ,frank ,breck5ridge on ,?ursday1 ,april ! fir/ "o ?\s& n9e hundr$ & tw5ty-"o ,9 case ( a second m>riage ( ! bride1 ! ann\ncem5t c>d reads 9 ?is mann]3 ,mr4 ,rob]t ,g4 ,ga9swor? & ,mrs4 ,h]b]t ,gaylord ,smi? ann\nce _! m>riage on ,?ursday1 ,augu/ ! ,elev5? "o ?\s& n9e hundr$ & tw5ty-"o ,! bride uses ! ann\ncem5t above only :5 %e is a wid[4 ,a divorce uses h] own fir/ & second names1 ) ! surname ( ! divorc$ husb&4 ,! ann\ncem5t c>d is engrav$ on %eets ( :ite pap] simil> 9 size & texture to ^? us$ = ! invitation4 ,x is po/$ on ! day ( ! w$d+4 ,! =ms giv5 above may be modifi$ by add+ ! "n ( ! ,*ur* 9 :i* ! c]emony 0 held1 or ! home address ( ! bride if x 0 a home w$d+4 ,) ! w$d+ invitation or ! ann\ncem5t c>d ! at home c>d ( ! bride may be includ$1 giv+ ! date ( h] return f ! honeymoon & h] future address4 ,?us3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,k4 ,n4 ,littleton ,at ,home 9 ,=e/ ,hills ,aft] ! eighte5? ( ,augu/ ,,invitation ,,to ,,w$d+ ,,anniv]s>y ,unlike ! w$d+ invitation1 t ( ! anniv]s>y may display "s delicate1 uno/5tati\s design significant ( ! occasion4 ,x is engrav$ on %eets or c>ds :i* may display ! entw9$ initials ( husb& & wife1 & ! ye> ( ! m>riage & w$d+ anniv]s>y4 ,= a silv] w$d+1 ! engrav+ may be done 9 silv]1 & gold lett]+ is p]missible = ! fifty-ye> anniv]s>y4 ,! two mo/ approv$ =ms = ! anniv]s>y invitations are giv5 bel[3 #ahge #aijj ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h5ry ,guy ,as*] ,at ,home ,w$nesday ev5+1 ,may ?ird aft] eight o'clock ,?irty-two ,p9e ,/reet #ahfc #aiac ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h5ry ,guy ,as*] reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company on ! ,fiftie? ,anniv]s>y ( _! m>riage on ,?ursday1 ,june ! ?ird at eight o'clock ,?irty-two ,p9e ,/reet ,,in=mal ,,w$d+ ,,invitation ,:5 a rec5t dea? 9 ! family1 or :5 p]sonal pref]5ce results 9 a s-call$ quiet w$d+1 :5 only ! imm$iate family & v close fri5ds are invit$1 a %ort note writt5 ei!r by ! bride-to-be or h] "m1 is ! only invitation4 ,foll[+ is a note ( ?is k9d f ! bride-elect to h] fri5d--& imm$iately bel[ x ! correct =m ( ackn[l$gm5t3 ,de> ,janet3 ,two weeks f ,monday1 on ! n9? ( ,septemb]1 ,mr4 ,brill & ,i are to be m>ri$4 ,we are ask+ only a few ( our mo/ intimate fri5ds to be pres5t1 & w\ld be v glad to h y among !m4 ,! c]emony w take place at f\r o'clock4 ,) k9de/ reg>ds1 ,i am ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,h>riet ,b4 ,h[e4 ,de> ,h>riet3 ,i %all be delight$ to att5d y\r w$d+ on ,septemb] n9?1 at f\r o'clock4 ,) cordial good wi%es to y & ,mr4 ,brill1 ,i am ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,janet ,b4 ,robb9s4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,,! ,,=mal ,,w$d+ ,,invitation ,:5 a breakfa/ or reception c>d is includ$1 a response mu/ be made promptly4 ,! =m ( ! invitation %\ld be foll[$ z ne>ly z possible4 ,x is writt5 on ! fir/ page ( a %eet ( social note pap]1 & address$ to ! p>5ts or gu>dians ( ! bride4 ,"h is ! =m us$ = acceptance3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,mortim] accept ) pleasure ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h5ry ,b4 ,flet*]'s k9d invitation to be pres5t at ! m>riage ( _! daught] ,hel5 ,m>ie to ,mr4 ,?omas ,wolcott on ,tuesday1 ! sev5? ( ,may at twelve o'clock & aft]w>d at ! w$d+ breakfa/ ,regrets are usually word$ 9 ?is mann]1 foll[+ closely ! invitation4 ,! reason = non-att5dance may or may n be giv53 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,mortim] exce$+ly regret t !y are unable to accept ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,flet*]'s k9d invitation to be pres5t at ! m>riage ( _! daught] ,hel5 ,m>ie to ,mr4 ,?omas ,wolcott on ,tuesday1 ! sev5? ( ,may at twelve o'clock & aft]w>d at ! w$d+ breakfa/ ,9 ! f\r? l9e ( ! fir/ ackn[l$gm5t above ! two la/ words at ! may be prefix$ to ! fif? l9e2 ! same holds true ( ! fif? l9e ( ! second ackn[l$gm5t4 ,a good /ation] w be able to give y ! exact preval5t vogue 9 ?is matt]4 ,,:om ,,to ,,invite ,x is necess>y = ! "y man & woman :o are ab\t to be m>ri$ to make out _! li/ ( ^? to :om invitations are to be s5t toge!r4 ,if ! w$d+ is to be a l>ge affair1 n only _! fri5ds b ! fri5ds ( _! p>5ts z well1 & bus9ess acqua9tances ( bo? families %\ld be invit$4 ,relatives & fri5ds 9 m\rn+ %\ld be invit$ b no res5tm5t %\ld be felt if !y d n att5d4 ,if ! w$d+ is a small "o great c>e %\ld be tak5 le/ ! gue/s are s num]\s z to ov]cr[d ! *ur* or home4 ,especially is ?is true ( ! home :]e ! space is usually m circumscrib$4 ,,s5d+ ,,! ,,invitations ,all invitations %\ld come f ! home ( ! bride1 ev5 ^? t are = ! p]sonal fri5ds ( h] husb& ev5 if !y are unkn[n to ! bride4 ,!y %\ld be mail$ f "o mon? to two weeks or t5 days be=e ! day set = ! w$d+4 ,if ! bride is an orphan !y are s5t 9 ! "n ( h] ne>e/ relative4 ,if !re is an old] bro!r !y may be issu$ 9 8 "n1 b nev] 9 ! "n ( a si/] unless %e is a great deal old] ?an ! bride or is h]self a m>ri$ woman4 ,if ! bride has lo/ "o p>5t & ! o!r has rem>ri$ %e may use h] own judgm5t z to :e!r to s5d ! invitation 9 ! "n ( h] p>5t or 9 ! names ( !m bo?4 ,! latt] is usually pref]r$1 z a matt] ( consid]ation t[>d ! /ep-p>5t4 ,,recall+ ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,invitation ,a sudd5 dea? 9 ! family1 illness1 accid5t1 or o!r s]i\s happ5+1 w>rants ! recall ( w$d+ invitations4 ,! p>5ts ( ! bride %\ld imm$iately notify gue/s ( ! po/ponem5t ( ! w$d+1 by issu+ pr9t$ c>ds4 ,a good size = ^! c>ds is ?ree & a qu>t] in*es 9 l5g? by "o & "o-qu>t] in*es 9 wid?4 ,! text is usually word$ 9 ?is mann]3 ,ow+ to ! sudd5 dea? ( ,mr4 ,h5ry ,rob]t's fa!r1 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,curtis are compell$ to recall ! invitations = _! daught]'s w$d+ on ,?ursday1 ,febru>y ! f\r?4 or ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,curtis beg to recall ! invitations issu$ = ! m>riage ( _! daught]1 ,grace ,hel51 & ,mr4 ,h5ry ,rob]ts1 on ,?ursday1 ,febru>y ! f\r?4 ,,break+ ,,an ,,engagem5t ,a brok5 engagem5t is always emb>rass+ = bo? ! "y man & ! "y lady4 ,fri5ds1 if !y are truly well-br$1 w n ask que/ions1 & relatives w n dem& explanations4 ,! obligations :i* su* a situation entails are unpleasant1 b x is inf9itely bett] to g ?r\gh ! ordeal ?an to face a m>riage :i* is c]ta9 to end 9 disa/]4 ,at su* a "t x is important = ! "y lady to h ! utmo/ dignity & self-possession4 ,%e is n expect$ to make any ann\ncem5t or (f] any explanations4 ,if a reception has be5 s*$ul$1 h] "m s5ds brief notes or engrav$ c>ds to ^? :o h be5 invit$1 in=m+ !m t ! engagem5t has be5 brok54 ,! "y lady1 if %e wi%es1 may confide 9 h] intimate fri5ds2 b to be bitt]1 to condemn h] =m] suitor 9 any way1 to sugge/ t p]haps he 0 n all t %e ?\ght he 0 at fir/1 n only reflects on h] own good judgm5t1 b is v poor =m & %[s lack ( delicacy4 ,if ! ann\ncem5t ( ! engagem5t has be5 made 9 ! pap]s su* a notice z ?is might be ins]t$ 9 ! "n ( ! p]son or p]sons :o fir/ made ! ann\ncem5t3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,c4 ,d4 ,simmons ann\nce t by mutual cons5t ! engagem5t betwe5 _! daught] ,agnes & ,george ,francis ,ri*>ds is at an end4 ,if invitations h be5 s5t out a simil> ann\ncem5t may be dispat*$ to ea* int5d$ gue/4 ,^! %\ld be engrav$ on :ite c>ds ( ! size recomm5d$ by ! /ation]4 ,if ! engagem5t 0 ann\nc$ only to intimate fri5ds ! bride %\ld s5d ea* ( !m a note /at+ t ! engagem5t is at an end4 ,x is mu* bett] nev] to give an explanation4 ,su* occasions z ?is mu/ h giv5 rise to ! prov]b1 ,lea/ said1 soone/ m5d$4 ,ev5 to ! bride's de>e/ fri5d ! foll[+ note is suffici5t3 ,bellevue1 ,june #a1 #ai-- ,de> ,ru?3 ,s9ce ,i wrote y la/ week some?+ has happ5$ :i* has made ,george & me reconsid] our engagem5t4 ,y w !re=e please disreg>d ! invitation = ,?ursday aft]noon4 ,ev] s9c]ely y\rs1 ,m>g>et ,frankl94 ,,return+ ,,gifts ,:5 an engagem5t is brok5 (f ! "y p return all exp5sive gifts & all lett]s t h pass$ betwe5 !m4 ,! "y lady always1 ( c\rse1 returns ! engagem5t r+4 ,if w$d+ pres5ts h be5 receiv$ f fri5ds ^! also mu/ be return$ ) a brief note expla9+ t ! w$d+ is n to take place4 ,x is necess>y to ?ank ! donor z w>mly z if no?+ _h happ5$4 ,x takes a great deal ( c\rage to face ! situation bravely & to g ?r\gh x )\t a sacrifice ( dignity4 ,"o ?+ mu/ be rememb]$3 ,don't be afraid ( :at p w say4 ,x is n _! happ9ess :i* is at /ake4 ,,:5 ,,dea? ,,int]v5es ,(t5 a dea? 9 ! family occurs :5 prep>ations are "u way = a w$d+4 ,if ! dea? is t ( a p>5t or v de> relative ! w$d+ %\ld be po/pon$1 if circum/ances p]mit1 z a m>k ( respect & s9c]e sorr[ = ! deceas$4 ,b if ! w$d+ mu/ take place z s*$ul$1 or ev5 two or ?ree mon?s aft] ! dea?1 good ta/e & delicacy dem& t x %all be quiet & simple1 ) only a few ne> relatives & fri5ds pres5t4 ,if ! c]emony is p]=m$ 9 *ur* !re %\ld be no g>l&s ( gay fl[]s to /rike a fe/ive note4 ,a bit ( f]n or o!r gre5 foliage "h & !re is suffici5t decoration4 ,! bride may h "o bridesmaid & a maid ( honor--b an elaborate bridal tra9 is consid]$ poor ta/e )9 six mon?s ( a de>ly belov$ "o's dea?4 ,! c]emony itself is dispat*$ ) exp$i5ce & rapidity1 yet )\t any semblance :atev] ( ha/e4 ,:e!r x is held 9 *ur* or at home1 ! w$d+ dur+ ! p]iod ( m\rn+ is *>act]iz$ by a solemn simplicity t has none ( ! triumphant joy\sness ( ! elaborate w$d+4 ,& /ill ! occasion sacrifices none ( its happ9ess1 = sorr[ br+s to human nature ! same mell[ sweetness t ! flight ( "t br+s to unta/$ w9e4 ,to pay fitt+ rev]5ce to ! dead1 w$d+s & receptions ( all k9ds %\ld be po/pon$4 ,b if circum/ances decree t !y %all take place1 !n ! occasion may be m>k$ by s quiet & unpret5ti\s a c]emony t ! respect due ! deceas$ is 9 no way violat$4 ,,*apt] ,v ,,w$d+s ,,! ,,*ur* ,,w$d+ ,! bride & groom decide betwe5 !m ! *ur* :]e !y wi% ! w$d+ to take place & ! cl]gyman :om !y wi% to (ficiate4 ,:5 !re is no religi\s diff]5ce betwe5 ! c\ple ! matt] is a v simple "o & ! *ur* :i* ! bride's family regul>ly att5ds is ! "o *os51 b :5 he is ( "o fai? & %e ( ano!r x may assume s]i\s proportions4 ,if nei!r is incl9$ to yield gracefully ! laws ( etiquette decree t ! groom %\ld give 91 n only because *ivalry dem&s x b also because ! w$d+ day by "r & tradition belongs prim>ily to ! bride4 ,! *ur* %\ld be decorat$ = ! occasion b n ) great elaboration4 ,palms1 f]ns1 & smilax1 roses1 lilies & o!r fl[]s are appropriate4 ,ribbon also may be us$ effectively4 ,:ite /ream]s are sometimes us$ to m>k (f ! seats :i* are to be occupi$ by ! relatives & intimate fri5ds ( ! bride & groom1 b !re are _m p :o d n l to indicate s def9itely ! l9es ( dem>cation among _! gue/s4 ,extravagance 9 any ( ! appo9tm5ts ( ! w$d+ are 9 extremely bad ta/e4 ,x is sometimes well to rememb] ! delightful logic ( ! old lady :o said t %e did n dress bett] ?an %e c\ld af=d to at home because ev]ybody knew h] & !re 0 no use try+ to impress !m2 & %e did n dress bett] ?an %e c\ld af=d :5 %e w5t to ! city because nobody knew h] & x did n make any diff]5ce :e!r %e impress$ !m or n4 ,no set =m ( decoration c be giv51 b magnific5t ornam5tation is out ( place 9 a simple *apel or *ur*1 & 9 e place pr(usion beyond "o's means is n only ill-br$ b fooli%4 ,,att5dants ,among ! ,anglo-,saxons ! cu/om ( an impressive escort = ! bride _h its orig94 ,to-day x is a matt] ( *oice1 & ! bride may h z _m or z few z %e pleases4 ,h] maid ( honor is usually h] si/] or h] be/ fri5d & h] bridesmaids are *os5 f among ^? :o are de>e/ to h]4 ,! groom *ooses ! be/ man & ! bride & groom toge!r select ! u%]s4 ,,! ,,bridesmaids ,al?\gh ! numb] ( bridesmaids is entirely a matt] ( *oice1 x is ! fa%ion at an elaborate *ur* w$d+ to h n less ?an five nor m ?an t54 ,a maid or matron ( honor1 two little pages or fl[] girls1 &1 if x is desir$1 a ?ird *ild to be> ! cu%ion to ! alt>1 completes ! bridal tra94 ,! bevy ( bridesmaids consi/s ( ! bride's de>e/ fri5ds4 ,if %e has si/]s1 "o ( !m1 z well z "o ( ! bridegroom's si/]s1 mu/ be includ$ 9 h] escort4 ,= maid or matron ( honor1 ! bride selects a si/] or intimate fri5d4 ,x is sometimes cu/om>y = ! bride to provide ! dresses ( h] bridesmaids4 ,?is1 h[ev]1 is dep5d5t ^u circum/ances & conditions1 & is n really ess5tial4 ,x is important1 ?\gh1 t ! bride visit ea* bridesmaid p]sonally & reque/ h] s]vices at ! w$d+1 unless %e lives at "s di/ance4 ,! bride1 if ! w$d+ is to be an elaborate "o1 may sugge/ to ! bridesmaids ! k9d ( g[ns %e w\ld l !m to we>4 ,! "y ladies may be tru/$ to foll[ h] wi%es implicitly4 ,no "o w\ld will+ly m> a fri5d's w$d+ by appe>+ 9 a g[n t does n agree ) ! g5]al plan4 ,! g[ns ne$ n be id5tical2 b ! colors mu/ be ! same1 or at lea/ h>monize4 ,light %ades are always ! fa%ion = bridesmaids4 ,:ite1 ( c\rse1 = ! bride4 ,! bridesmaids %\ld be invit$ _m weeks be=e ! w$d+ s t !y w h ample "t = prep>ation4 ,ne>ly always ! dress has to be made1 & ?is takes "t4 ,x is cu/om>y = ! bridesmaids to be dress$ alike or v ne>ly alike4 ,! cu/om _h its orig9 9 primitive times :5 evil spirits 7 suppos$ to att5d w$d+ c]emonies & ! bride & groom 7 surr\nd$ by fri5ds ( _! own age & sex dress$ simil>ly s t ! spirits c\ld n s+le out ! happy c\ple = _! evil designs4 ,x is a f> cry f t "t to ?is1 & ! only reason :y ! bridesmaids are dress$ simil>ly n[ is because ! effect is s mu* pretti] ?an c\ld be atta9$ by a miscellane\s array ( g[ns1 h[ev] beautiful ea* "o 9 itself might be4 ,!y c>ry fl[]s1 ei!r cut fl[]s or b\quets1 b _! b\quets are nev] s elaborate z t c>ri$ by ! bride4 ,usually !y we> a bit ( jewelry :i* 0 pres5t$ by ! groom4 ,?is1 too1 is a curi\s survival ( primitive m>riage cu/oms :5 ! groom _h to capture ! bride1 & because %e 0 fleet-foot$ & wild 7or p]haps because he 0 lazy71 brib$ h] fri5ds to lure h] to ! place :]e he 0 wait+4 ,,rehe>sals ,elaborate w$d+s %\ld always be rehe>s$ at lea/ once be=eh&4 ,9 arrang+ ^! rehe>sals ! bride mu/ h 9 m9d ! conv5i5ce ( h] att5dants1 & by consult+ !m1 %\ld settle ^u a "t t w be agreeable = ! majority4 ,! reque/s = "o's pres5ce at a rehe>sal may be made v]bally or by notes4 ,refre%m5ts are usually s]v$ aft]w>d at ! home ( ! bride4 ,%e mu/ arrange = ! op5+ ( ! *ur*1 & %e %\ld provide a way = ! "y ladies :o are at "s di/ance to get !re4 ,! details ( ! c]emony %\ld be practic$ until ! :ole ?+ c be accompli%$ ) ease & grace4 ,e possible ef=t mu/ be made to elim9ate a /ilt$ & wood5 effect on ! actual day ( ! w$d+4 ,,reg>d+ ,,! ,,u%]s ,at ! rehe>sal !y %\ld receive c>eful in/ructions 7usually f ! cl]gyman71 z a l>ge "p ( ! smoo?ness & *>m ( ! w$d+ c]emony dep5ds ^u _! k ( ! "r ?+ to d at ! "r "t4 ,on ! day ( ! w$d+1 !y mu/ be at ! *ur* at lea/ an h\r be=e ! s*$ul$ "t = ! c]emony4 ,x is "p ( _! duty to welcome ! gue/s & escort !m to _! seats4 ,an old cu/om 0 = ! u%] to (f] 8 "r arm to a lady1 & al?\gh x /ill prevails1 a m accept$ =m is = him to welcome ea* gue/ ) a smile1 prec$e h] d[n ! aisle1 & ) a graceful indication1 direct h] to h] place4 ,front seats %\ld always be res]v$ = ! relatives & mo/ intimate fri5ds ( bo? families4 ,at mo/ fa%ionable w$d+s1 ! names ( ! p to receive ^! front seats are tabulat$ on c>ds & giv5 to ! u%]s4 ,ano!r cu/om t is p]missible is to m>k (f ! numb] ( seats 9 front t are to be res]v$ ) a :ite ribbon1 ext5d+ f aisle to aisle & t]m9at+ at ! end seats ) pretty b[s or fe/oons4 ,?is mann] ( res]v+ seats = ! gue/s ( honor is n only effective1 b is also decorative4 ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,day ,june & ,octob]1 because ! wea!r is usually beautiful & fl[]s are m abundant ?an at o!r times1 are ! favorite mon?s = brides1 ?\gh !re is n a s+le mon? out ( ! twelve t does n see its full quota ( elaborate w$d+s4 ,dur+ ,l5t !re are few] ?an at any o!r "t4 ,!re is an old sup]/ition :i* says t ,friday is an unlucky day = a w$d+1 b ! prejudice t rose f x has s l>gely be5 done away ) t ! only *oice among ! days ( ! week is t :i* rises f ! bride's p]sonal conv5i5ce & desire4 ,a w$d+ may take place at any h\r ( ! day4 ,morn+ w$d+s are usually v simple4 ,elaborate c]emonies are usually p]=m$ at high noon or 9 ! ev5+ :ile ! w$d+ t is nei!r v simple nor v elaborate 7& ?is means mo/ w$d+s7 takes place 9 ! aft]noon4 ,9 a great _m in/ances ! h\r has to be arrang$ ) ref]5ce to ! "t ! tra9 on :i* ! bride & groom expect to leave dep>ts4 ,,arriv+ ,,at ,,! ,,*ur* ,! w$d+ p>ty %\ld arrive promptly at ! *ur* a few m9utes be=e ! "t m5tion$ = ! c]emony4 ,few mom5ts are m t5sely anxi\s ?an ^? 9 :i* a belat$ memb] ( ! w$d+ p>ty is await$ by ! o!rs4 ,= ?is reason1 x is always bett] to assemble at ! home ( ! bride r ?an 9 ! ve/ibule ( ! *ur* or else:]e4 ,except ! groom & be/ man1 :o await ! o!rs 9 ! ve/ry & ! u%]s :o h gone on ahead an h\r or s e>li]4 ,! bride's "m1 ! maid ( honor & gue/s leave ! home ( ! bride fir/4 ,!y are foll[$ by ! bridesmaids4 ,! la/ to leave are ! bride & h] fa!r4 ,! bride's "m is escort$ to h] place 7! aisle seat ( ! front pew on ! left side7 by ! head u%]4 ,^? ( h] *ildr5 :o h no "p 9 ! procession accompany h]4 ,! family ( ! bridegroom are simil>ly conduct$ to _! res]v$ place1 ! front pew on ! "r side4 ,z soon z ! bridesmaids & ! bridal p>ty arrive at ! door ( ! *ur*1 ! bridegroom is in=m$1 & ! entire cortge assembles 9 ! ve/ibule4 ,! organi/ has previ\sly be5 in=m$ z to :at musical selections are to be play$1 & z soon z he gets 8 cue1 he /rikes a *ord--& :ile ! mell[ notes ( ! organ peal =? 7usually ! beautiful tones ( ! w$d+-m>* f ,loh5gr97 ! doors at ! foot ( ! aisle sl[ly sw+ op54 ,,w$d+ ,,music ,! bride usually ent]s on ,loh5gr9 & goes out on ,m5delssohn4 ,?r\gh\t ! c]emony1 except :5 pray]s are be+ said1 !re %\ld be s(t music & ! organ %\ld cont9ue to play until all ! gue/s h left ! *ur*1 unless *imes are rung4 ,9 ! ev5t t !re are *imes !y %\ld beg9 to r+ z soon z ! bridal p>ty has left ! *ur*4 ,! music = a *ur* s]vice may be v /ately & impressive4 ,besides ! organ /r+$ in/rum5ts may be employ$ & soloi/s or a *oir may be ask$ to s+4 ,music is especially pleas+ dur+ ! "t :5 ! gue/s are wait+ = ! w$d+ p>ty to assemble4 ,! musical program 9 ! home is n v diff]5t4 ,a piano & "o or two /r+$ in/rum5ts furni% ! in/rum5tal music :ile fri5ds ( ! bride & groom may be reque/$ to s+4 ,^! %\ld be rew>d$ by a gift f ! groom4 ,!re is a wid] *oice 9 ! k9d ( music :i* may be us$ at ! home w$d+1 = ! beautiful secul> love songs :i* are out ( place at ! *ur* are mo/ appropriate "h4 ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,procession ,! ord] ( ! w$d+ procession dep5ds l>gely ^u ! numb] ( att5dants4 ,! foll[+ arrangem5t is frequ5tly obs]v$3 ,! u%]s ent] fir/1 walk+ sl[ly d[n ! aisle two by two4 ,! bridesmaids foll[ 9 ! same mann]1 ! maid ( honor1 :o is unatt5d$1 comes next1 foll[$ by ! bride1 :o leans on ! arm ( h] fa!r4 ,fl[] girls may prec$e ! procession or !y may walk j 9 front ( ! bride & a page or pages may be add$ to ! gr\p to be> ! tra9 ( ! bride's g[n4 ,! bride is always ! la/ to ent] & %e comes alone or ) :oev] is to give h] away at ! alt>4 ,z !y rea* ! alt> ! u%]s sep>ate1 "o half mov+ to ! "r1 ! o!r to ! left4 ,! bridesmaids d likewise1 & ! maid ( honor /eps to ! left ( ! bride :ile %e & h] fa!r advance t[>d ! space left at ! foot ( ! alt> = !m4 ,at ?is po9t ! groom & be/ man come =w>d & ! bride slips h] h& f h] fa!r's arm & places x 9 ! h& ( ! groom1 :o leads h] to ! cl]gyman4 ,h] fa!r /&s at h] "r4 ,,! ,,c]emony ,! c]emony is p]=m$ 9 accordance ) ! rites prescrib$ by ! religi\s belief ( ! "y p :o are ab\t to be m>ri$4 ,! cl]gyman is ! p]son to consult ab\t any emb>rass+ situations t might arise4 ,z ! w$d+ r+ is worn on ! same f+] t has previ\sly worn ! engagem5t r+ ! bride usually removes ! latt] & places x on ! correspond+ f+] ( ! "r h&4 ,%e may all[ x to rema9 !re aft] ! c]emony or %e may place x on ! same f+] ) ! w$d+ r+4 ,x is all[able to leave ! engagem5t r+ 9 place & slip ! w$d+ r+ on ov] x4 ,a ^w ab\t ! r+ itself4 ,l _m ano!r ( our practices to-day its use is a survival f primitive times :5 wom5 7 *attels & a man's wife 0 8 prop]ty1 8 slave to d ) z he pleas$1 & ! r+ 0 ( heavy iron1 a sign ( bondage4 ,n m ?an a decade back ! r+ 0 too heavy to be com=table on ! f+]1 b n[ x is a sl5d] b& ( gold or plat9um ) or )\t scroll-"w or o!r ornam5tation1 z ! we>] may desire4 ,its symbolism is v beautiful4 ,! preci\s metal is an emblem ( ! purity ( ! love betwe5 a man & 8 wife & ! circle itself is a symbol ( et]nity4 ,be=e ent]+ ! *ur* ! bride removes ! glove f h] left h& & %e may give x ) h] b\quet to ! maid ( honor to hold dur+ ! c]emony4 ,! practice ( ripp+ "o f+] ( ! glove s z to leave x b>e = ! r+ is a v fooli% "o & has nev] f\nd favor among p ( good bre$+4 ,x is ! "p ( ! be/ man to look aft] ! groom4 ,8 s]vices may be requir$ 9 connection ) _m ( ! prelim9>y details ( ! w$d+ ev5 9 ! procur+ ( ! lic5se4 ,at ! w$d+ itself he takes *>ge ( ! r+ & ! cl]gyman's fee1 giv+ ! =m] to ! groom j be=e ! c]emony requires him to place x on ! bride's f+]4 ,! bride's fa!r rema9s directly beh9d h] until ! cl]gyman asks1 ,:o give? ?is woman to ?is man8 :5 he comes =w>d1 takes 8 daught]'s h&1 lays x 9 t ( ! groom1 & says1 ,i d4 ,he !n turns away & retires to ! pew1 :]e 8 wife is sitt+4 ,,leav+ ,,! ,,alt> ,:5 ! f9al bless+ has be5 pron\nc$ ! bridal gr\p may /& at ! alt> = a :ile receiv+ _! fri5ds & !n break up in=mally1 or ! procession may leave ! *ur* 9 rev]se ord] f t 9 :i* !y ent]$1 ! bride & groom walk+ fir/ toge!r1 foll[$ by ! be/ man & ! maid ( honor & ! bridesmaids & ! u%]s walk+ 9 pairs4 ,! automobile ( ! bride & groom %\ld be wait+ at ! door to :isk !m away to ! home ( ! bride1 :]e prep>ations are made = ! w$d+ j\rney4 ,,?r[+ ,,! ,,b\quet ,x is a pretty cu/om = ! bride to ?r[ h] b\quet among ! bridesmaids 7especially lovely :5 ! w$d+ takes place at home & ! bride turns to ?r[ ! fl[]s z %e m\nts ! /airs74 ,x is a happy om5 = ! "y lady :o cat*es ! b\quet4 ,%e may divide x among ! o!rs or %e may keep x = h]self4 ,x is n compulsory = ! bride to "p ) ! b\quet if %e pref]s to keep x h]self4 ,%e may press ! fl[]s or %e may h rose beads made f ! petals or %e may dispose ( x 9 any way %e desires4 ,a well-kn[n "y society woman :o 0 m>ri$ rec5tly 9 "o ( ,new ,york's mo/ exclusive *ur*es1 ord]$ all ! fl[]s us$ 9 decorations to be s5t to a c]ta9 hospital to gladd5 ! sl[ly dragg+ h\rs ( ! suff]]s4 ,%e has creat$ a prec$5t t e bride %\ld be pr\d & happy to foll[4 ,aft] all1 ! greate/ happ9ess is 9 mak+ o!rs happy4 ,! joy ( ! w$d+ day w ga9 a new sweetness :5 a k9d de$ adds to its pleasure4 ,r let ! suff]]s 9 a hospital enjoy ! colorful fragrance ( ! fl[]s ?an p]mit !m to wilt1 =gott51 9 ! *ur*4 ,,rice1 ,,etc4 ,frequ5tly a %[] ( rice foll[s ! dep>t+ c\ple1 & sat9 slipp]s are ?r[n aft] ! c>4 ,c>e mu/ be tak5 n to ov]do ?is anci5t cu/om1 = al?\gh x is consid]$ good luck = "o ( ! sat9 slipp]s to alight on ! top ( ! c>1 x is c]ta9ly bad =m to give ! occasion any appe>ance :atsoev] ( vulg>ity4 ,x is int]e/+ to trace ?is cu/om back to its orig94 ,among ! anci5t ,egyptians & ,hebrews a slipp] or s&al 0 a symbol t d5ot$ an ex*ange ( prop]ty4 ,wom5 at t "t 7 reg>d$ z prop]ty1 & !y 7 giv5 9 ex*ange = o!r prop]ty4 ,lat] we f9d1 9 ,anglo-,saxon m>riages1 t ! bride's fa!r deliv]s h] %oe to ! bridegroom1 :o t\*es h] on ! head ) x 9 tok5 ( 8 own]%ip & au?ority4 ,! cu/om prevail$1 & /ill lat] we f9d t ! idea ( good luck is associat$ ) ! ?r[+ ( slipp]s at w$d+s4 ,rice & gra9 7 comb9$ ) ! c]emony ( ?r[+ %oes1 obvi\sly indicat+ a plea to ! deity ( ,productiv5ess to bless ! m>riage ) an abundant supply ( nature's b\nties4 ,to-day ! cu/om is /ill 9 vogue4 ,old sat9 slipp]s & h&fuls ( rice are ?r[n aft] ! dep>t+ c\ple4 ,x w\ld n be an objectionable cu/om if "s ov]-en?usia/ic individuals did n ov]do x to ! ext5t t x becomes almo/ riot\s4 ,aft] a solemn1 dignifi$1 well-ord]$ w$d+ c]emony1 & a *>m+ reception1 x is no?+ %ort ( ridicul\s to spoil x all by boi/]\sly ov]do+ an old tradition4 ,! cultur$ p]son is always well-pois$1 always calm--:e!r x be dur+ ! t5se mom5ts ( ! w$d+-v[ utt]ances1 or ! half-glad1 half-sad mom5ts ( see+ ! happy pair (f4 ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,reception ,fa%ionable w$d+s1 if n celebrat$ ) a w$d+ breakfa/1 are foll[$ by a reception ei!r 9 ! aft]noon or ev5+4 ,all ! bridal att5dants are pres5t1 & ^? relatives & fri5ds :o h previ\sly receiv$ invitations4 ,! reception takes place 9 ! draw+ room ( ! bride's home4 ,! room is decorat$ ) fl[]s1 & 9 ! hall is a refre%m5t table on :i* is pun*1 cakes & boxes conta9+ favors = ea* ( ! gue/s4 ,! bride & groom /& toge!r "u a floral bell & accept ! congratulations & good wi%es ( ! gue/s4 ,! bride's "m & fa!r are at ! door ( ! draw+ room to welcome !m1 & ! p>5ts ( ! groom are also ready to receive & welcome ! gue/s z !y arrive4 ,x is an important duty ( ! u%]s1 at ! w$d+ reception1 to introduce to ! bride all ^? gue/s :om %e does n "k4 ,%e accepts _! congratulations ) a smile & a cordial ^w or two 9 ackn[l$gm5t ( ! introduction4 ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,breakfa/ ,w$d+ breakfa/s1 ?\gh an old ,engli% cu/om1 are (t5 held aft] ! *ur* w$d+4 ,if x is decid$ ^u1 ! gue/s to be invit$ %\ld be in=m$ at lea/ two weeks 9 advance4 ,! occasion has all ! dignity & =mality ( a d9n] p>ty4 ,! bride & groom ent] ! d9+ room fir/4 ,!y are foll[$ by ! bride's "m & ! groom's fa!r1 & ! groom's "m & ! bride's fa!r4 ,! bridesmaids & u%]s are always invit$ to ! w$d+ breakfa/1 & !y foll[ imm$iately aft] ! p>5ts ( ! happy c\ple4 ,! prec$5ce ( ! o!r invit$ gue/s is arrang$ by ! "m ( ! bride4 ,! m5u at a w$d+ breakfa/ is nev] elaborate4 ,consomme or b\illon1 salads1 birds1 ices1 jellies & bonbons are ! usual ord]4 ,c(fee & da9ty cakes are s]v$ la/4 ,! w$d+ cake1 if "o is s]v$ at all1 is set be=e ! bride4 ,! bride gives "o-&-"o-half to two h\rs to h] gue/s at ! w$d+ breakfa/4 ,!n %e retires to h] room1 accompani$ by ! maid ( honor & h] mo/ intimate fri5ds among ! bridesmaids2 & :5 %e appe>s aga9 %e is 9 travel+ co/ume4 ,! groom has also retir$ to *ange 8 clo!s1 & he meets ! bride at ! foot ( ! /airs4 ,! motor is at ! door 9 read9ess1 & aft] ! la/ :isp]$ good-bys1 w>m h&clasps & ha/y kisses--! bride & groom are (f6 ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,pres5t ,! cu/om ( giv+ w$d+ pres5ts dates f away back 9 ,dut* hi/ory :5 ! relatives & fri5ds ( ! bride & groom took ^u !mselves ! responsibility ( furni%+ ! new h\sehold4 ,great ta/e & discrim9ation %\ld be ex]cis$ 9 ! select+ ( gifts & !y %\ld be s5t e>ly4 ,two mon?s be=e ! w$d+ is n too soon4 ,x is wise = ! fri5ds :5ev] possible to consult ea* o!r s t !y w n duplicate gifts4 ,if mo/ ( ! silv]1 etc41 is gott5 f ! same jewel] he is a great help 9 select+ some?+ t is n only appropriate 9 itself b 9 h>mony ) ! o!r gifts4 ,anyone :o receives an invitation may s5d ! bride a gift1 ?\gh x is n absolutely necess>y to respond to ! invitation 9 ?is way4 ,to ! "q3 ,:at %all ! gift be8 ! answ] is ! prettie/ & mo/ useful article )9 "o's means4 ,*9a & silv] are always appropriate1 & cut glass1 l951 books1 & ev5 *ecks or gold pieces are mo/ acceptable4 ,!re is a slight prejudice aga9/ giv+ money z a pres5t at a w$d+ or at any o!r "t1 b "o has only to see ! joy t ! bride & groom get out ( sp5d+ ! money ov] & ov] aga9 be=e !y f9ally d sp5d x to h ?is prejudice dispell$4 ,silv] & l95 are usually m>k$ ) ! initials ( ! bride1 m (t5 ?an n ) ! initials ( h] maid5 "n4 ,if !re is any d\bt z to :i* %e pref]s & "o is n able to f9d out indirectly1 x is p]missible to ask h]4 ,gifts %\ld always be accompani$ by ! c>ds ( ! donors1 b ^! %\ld be remov$ :5 !y are plac$ on display4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,,w$d+ ,,pres5ts ,x is n suffici5t m]ely to keep ! c>ds :i* accompany ! w$d+ gifts b !re mu/ be "s sy/em by :i* ! bride c rememb] :i* gift ea* "o accompani$4 ,%e may indicate ?is on ! c>d itself or %e may keep a li/ ( ! names ( ! donors ) ! names ( ! gifts opposite1 b %e mu/ be absolutely sure t %e is ?ank+ ! "r p]son4 ,illu/ration3 ,br[n ,bros4 ,,*ur* ,,decorat$ ,,= ,a ,,=mal ,,w$d+ ,if ! honeymoon is to be only two weeks or !reab\ts ! bride may wait until h] return to ?ank h] fri5ds1 b if x is to be ( long duration %e %\ld write ! notes ( ackn[l$gm5t z soon z %e f9ds x conv5i5t to d s4 ,^! p]sonal notes--& a p]sonal note is ! only prop] way to ?ank "o = a w$d+ pres5t--are usually writt5 by ! bride1 b %e %\ld always be c>eful to introduce h] husb&'s "n unless ! gift 0 a v intimate "o = h] alone4 ,! foll[+ note is a graceful way = bo? husb& & wife to express _! gratitude3 ,july #a1 #aiba4 ,de> ,rosal9d3 ,george & ,i bo? wi% to ?ank y = ! lovely picture4 ,:5 we return f ,atlantic ,city we %all hang x 9 our liv+ room :]e all ( our fri5ds c enjoy x ) u4 ,we hope t y w be among ! fir/ to visit u 9 our new home4 ,v s9c]ely y\rs1 ,annie ,be>d ,hill4 ,sometimes ! groom receives p]sonal gifts f fri5ds ( 84 ,to ^! he writes notes ( ?anks 9 8 own "n4 ,,! ,,home ,,w$d+ ,home w$d+s c (t5 be made z impressive z *ur* w$d+s4 ,) correct decorations ! mo/ spaci\s rooms 9 ! bride's h\se c be trans=m$ into an int]ior z lovely z ! int]ior ( a beautifully decorat$ *ur*4 ,= in/ance1 at a fa%ionable home w$d+1 held rec5tly1 ! draw+ room 0 decorat$ ) massive floral wrea?s & clu/]s ( palms4 ,a huge bell ( fl[]s hung 9 ! c5t] ( ! room1 & a canopy ( fl[]s1 occupy+ "o corn]1 simulat$ a *apel4 ,! effect 0 altoge!r delightful4 ,only close relatives & fri5ds %\ld be invit$ to ! home w$d+4 ,! bridegroom does n ent] ! home ( ! bride until a half h\r be=e ! c]emony beg9s1 & :5 he does arrive1 he & 8 be/ man d n m+le ) ! o!r gue/s b retire to an adjo9+ room provid$ = !m4 ,! cl]gyman also retires to ?is room :5 he arrives1 & x is "h t he dons 8 (ficial robe4 ,! ?ree rema9 until x is ann\nc$ t ! bride is ready to ent] ! draw+ room4 ,! bride's "m1 assi/$ by h] husb&1 receives ! gue/s4 ,x is n consid]$ good =m to beg9 ! c]emony until !y h all arriv$4 ,!n1 :5 ev]y?+ is 9 read9ess1 ! bride is met at ! head ( ! /airs by h] fa!r1 & is conduct$ by him to ! entrance ( ! room4 ,usually !re is no elaborate w$d+ procession1 & ev5 9 ! mo/ fa%ionable home w$d+ !re is (t5 only a maid or matron ( honor to prec$e ! bride4 ,!re are r>ely m ?an half a doz5 bridesmaids at mo/4 ,! ord] ( prec$5ce is simil> to t ( ! *ur* w$d+2 ! cl]gyman p]=ms ! c]emony "u a floral canopy1 & :5 x is complet$1 he /eps aside & ! newly m>ri$ c\ple take 8 place to receive ! congratulations & good wi%es ( ! gue/s4 ,! w$d+ breakfa/ or reception proce$s imm$iately ^u ! conclusion ( ! c]emony4 ,ev]yone pres5t is a gue/2 & ev]yone pres5t att5ds ! reception4 ,,! ,,second ,,w$d+ ,:5 a woman m>ries = ! second "t1 h] w$d+ %\ld be v cons]vative4 ,elaborate c]emonies w\ld1 inde$1 be out ( place4 ,h[ev]1 ! m important conditions ( ! c]emony are foll[$ v mu* along ! same l9es4 ,:ite is = ! girl-bride only4 ,! woman :o m>ries = ! second "t indulges 9 none ( ! age-old cu/oms t ! fir/ bride does4 ,%e does n we> a :ite veil2 %e does n c>ry orange blossoms2 %e does n h fl[] girls or pages or bridesmaids4 ,! m inconspicu\s ! second w$d+ is1 ! m x is 9 accordance ) ! rules ( etiquette4 ,! bride-=-!-second-"t may h a maid ( honor only on "o occasion4 ,if %e has a *ur* w$d+ & invites num]\s gue/s1 %e may h a maid ( honor to prec$e h] to ! alt>4 ,z 9 ! fir/ w$d+1 h] fa!r gives h] away4 ,h] family assumes all responsibility = ! exp5ses involv$ unless %e pref]s to d s h]self4 ,if a reception is giv5 aft] ! c]emony1 ! same ord] ( prec$5ce is foll[$ z aft] ! fir/ w$d+2 ! reception may be held ei!r 9 ! home ( ! bride's p>5ts1 or 9 h] own home4 ,if m>ri$ 9 *ur*1 !re are none ( ! elaborate decorations t *>act]ize ! fir/ bridal1 al?\gh fl[]s are always acceptable4 ,especially if ! second c]emony takes place only a %ort "t aft] ! m\rn+ p]iod = ! fir/ husb&1 any conspicu\s display is 9 v bad ta/e4 ,,"s ,,important ,,conv5tions ,x is cu/om>y = a wid[ to remove ! engagem5t r+ & w$d+ r+ ( h] fir/ husb& be=e ! day ( h] second w$d+4 ,! sight ( !m _c be 9 any way pleasant to h] new husb&1 & !y may be a s\rce ( sorr[ful memory to h]4 ,x is be/ to disc>d !m z soon z ! second m>riage is decid$ ^u4 ,!re has always be5 "s d\bt z to :e!r or n ! family ( ! second-bride's fir/ husb& %\ld be invit$ to h] w$d+4 ,absolutely4 ,!re is no reason :y !y %\ld be ignor$1 any m ?an any ( ! o!r fri5ds & acqua9tances ( ! bride4 ,9 fact1 %e owes !m a special c\rtesy1 & if !y accept ! invitation1 !y mu/ be treat$ ) ! k9de/ att5tion & c\rtesy4 ,!y mu/ always occupy seats bel[ ! :ite ribbon1 if ! w$d+ is held at *ur*4 ,if !re is = any reason diss5sion or disagreem5t betwe5 h] & h] fir/ husb&'s family1 %e w n ( c\rse invite !m4 ,b t may only be an individual case2 ! g5]al rule is to invite !m & treat !m ) ! utmo/ consid]ation4 ,gifts at ! second w$d+ w n be z elaborate z ^? at ! fir/ w$d+4 ,h[ev]1 ea* gift mu/ be ackn[l$g$ ) a cordial note ( ?anks4 ,9 fact1 all ! etiquette ( ! fir/ w$d+ is obs]v$1 except t x is on a mu* simpl] scale4 ,z = ! man :o m>ries = ! second "t1 he1 too1 foll[s ! orig9al dictates ( w$d+ etiquette1 & elim9ates only ! f>ewell ba*elor d9n]4 ,"h also ! c]emony & reception is on a consid]ably less extravagant /yle4 ,,seek+ ,,advice ,! girl or woman :o is ab\t to be m>ri$ c always get helpful sugge/ions f h] fri5ds :o h be5 m>ri$ or h witness$ fa%ionable w$d+s4 ,! m9i/] 9 *>ge is especially qualifi$ to give y a great deal ( important advice1 & "o %\ld nev] hesitate to consult him4 ,9 8 (ficial capacity he has d\btless s]v$ at _m w$d+s1 _m ( !m well-nigh p]fect1 "s ( !m m>r$ by ! v blund]s t he c tea* y to avoid4 ,,w$d+ ,,anniv]s>ies ,!re is some?+ /rangely beautiful & poetic 9 ! celebration ( a w$d+ anniv]s>y4 ,x ar\ses slumb]+ s5tim5ts & mell[s old memories into a ?robb+ happ9ess4 ,"h are ! w$d+ anniv]s>ies t are usually celebrat$ 9 our bett] society3 ,! ,pap] ,w$d+--fir/ ye>4 ,! ,wood5 ,w$d+--fif? ye>4 ,! ,t9 ,w$d+--t5? ye>4 ,! ,lea!r ,w$d+--twelf? ye>4 ,! ,cry/al ,w$d+--fifte5? ye>4 ,! ,*9a ,w$d+--tw5tie? ye>4 ,! ,silv] ,w$d+--tw5ty-fif? ye>4 ,! ,ivory ,w$d+--?irtie? ye>4 ,! ,wool5 ,w$d+--=tie? ye>4 ,! ,silk ,w$d+--=ty-fif? ye>4 ,! ,gold5 ,w$d+--fiftie? ye>4 ,! ,diamond ,w$d+--sev5ty-fif? ye>4 ,al?\gh _m families celebrate all ( ^! anniv]s>ies1 x is m g5]ally ! fa%ion to disreg>d all ^? t come be=e ! qu>t]-c5tury m>k4 ,! fir/ anniv]s>y to be celebrat$ is usually ! silv] w$d+4 ,! mo/ favor$ way ( do+ ?is is to h a d9n] p>ty or a reception4 ,sometimes1 especially :5 !re are "y unm>ri$ daught]s1 a dance is giv5 & a d9n] foll[s lat]4 ,,! ,,silv] ,,w$d+ ,c>ds = ! silv] w$d+ reception %\ld be pr9t$ on :ite or silv]-gray pap]4 ,!y may be pr9t$ 9 silv] or black4 ,!y may be word$ 9 ! usual at home =m1 or may be 9 ?is =m3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,s4 ,br[n reque/ ! pleasure ( 444444444444's pres5ce at ! d9n] reception ( _! ,silv] ,w$d+ on ,tuesday1 ,june ! f\rte5? at sev5 o'clock #ahig #aibb ,if an invitation l ! "o above is issu$1 ! gue/s w und\bt$ly s5d beautiful gifts ( silv]--unless1 z is (t5 ! case1 x is reque/$ 9 ! invitation t no gifts be pres5t$4 ,sometimes1 9 fact1 ! bride & groom ( tw5ty-five ye>s commemorate _! silv] w$d+ by !mselves1 s5d+ h&some gifts ( silv] to ^? :o />t$ out 9 m>ri$ life at ab\t ! same "t t !y did1 b :o h n be5 mat]ially s =tunate4 ,,! ,,reception ,if a reception celebrates ! silv] w$d+1 ! husb& assi/s 8 wife 9 receiv+4 ,(t5 ! occasion beg9s at ! precise h\r at :i* ! m>riage took place2 b usually ! pref]r$ "t is 9 ! late aft]noon or ev5+4 ,! bridal c\ple %\ld make an ef=t to h z _m z ! orig9al p>ty ( bridal att5dants pres5t z possible4 ,x w be int]e/+ = ! be/ man & ! maid ( honor to h a little *at toge!r aft] tw5ty-five ye>s4 ,! husb& leads ! way to ! d9+ room ) 8 wife on 8 arm1 & %e sits at ! "r ( him at ! table4 ,if ! hi/oric w$d+ cake is includ$ 9 ! collation1 x is plac$ be=e ! bride1 j z x 0 tw5ty-five ye>s ago4 ,! table decorations %\ld be :ite & silv]1 ) a t\* ( gre54 ,! m5u w be ! regul> =mal d9n] m5u1 s]v$ & g>ni%$ ) a reg>d = decorative effect4 ,spee*es are 9 ord]1 & a toa/ is usually propos$ = ! c\ple4 ,! husb& responds ) a little spee* 9 :i* he honors 8 wife1 & %e ackn[l$ges ) a smile t is 9 itself suffici5t eloqu5ce = ! occasion4 ,t9y silv] favors1 pack$ neatly 9 small :ite boxes & ti$ ) silv] ribbon are effective novelties at ! silv] w$d+4 ,,t9 ,,& ,,wood5 ,,w$d+s ,a g5]al frolic is 9 ord] at ! t9 w$d+4 ,x is r>ely celebrat$1 9 fact1 unless ! t5-ye>-m>ri$ husb& & wife wi% to ga!r toge!r all _! old fri5ds & h a jolly good "t4 ,gifts are usually 9 ! =m ( t9 kit*5 ut5sils1 t9 c&le-/icks1 t9 fans1 t9 ornam5ts--ev5 t9 tables & *airs are (f]$ z gifts to celebrate ! t5? anniv]s>y4 ,a d9n]1 v mu* l ! ord9>y in=mal d9n] except = ! additional t9 celebrations1 foll[s ! reception4 ,wood5 w$d+s are n v (t5 held1 al?\gh "s v fa%ionable ones are record$ 9 ! annals ( social hi/ory4 ,roll+-p9s1 /ep-ladd]s1 & wood5 kit*5 ut5sils cause mu* m]rim5t :5 pres5t$ z gifts1 & ! occasion is g5]ally "o ( mu* pleasant raill]y4 ,wood5 ornam5ts make v appropriate gifts = ?is w$d+1 & a bit ( wood arti/ically c>v$ is always welcome to ! five-ye> bride :o loves pretty ?+s = ! home4 ,,! ,,gold5 ,,w$d+ ,to h liv$ fifty ye>s toge!r1 to h %>$ = fifty ye>s ea* o!r's sorr[s1 joys & hopes1 is to h enjoy$ "o ( ! greate/ gifts life has to (f]4 ,x is an occasion well wor?y ( ! mo/ elaborate celebration4 ,a gold5 w$d+ has a t\* ( ! romantic1 a t\* ( ! s5tim5tal ab\t x4 ,poets l to write ab\t x2 p l to dream ab\t x4 ,:5 x becomes a reality1 all ! _w likes to wat*--& wond]4 ,x is a solemn & dignifi$ ev5t & %\ld be treat$ z an occasion ( ! utmo/ importance4 ,! c\ple %\ld issue pure :ite c>ds engrav$ 9 gold1 ann\nc+ ! celebration ( ! fiftie? anniv]s>y ( _! w$d+ day4 ,x is t\*+ to h ! maid ( honor & ! be/ man pres5t1 if !y are bo? /ill liv+4 ,z _m ( ! orig9al bridal att5dants z are available %\ld be invit$1 & all ! old fri5ds & acqua9tances ( ! family4 ,!re mu/ be no levity1 ! c\ple mu/ be treat$ ) rev]5ce & honor1 & ! occasion mu/ be giv5 e appe>ance ( dignifi$ importance4 ,unlike ! silv] w$d+1 gifts are always pres5t$ to ! ag$ c\ple at ! gold5 w$d+4 ,delicate pieces ( gold jewelry are always pleas+ to ! bride4 ,! groom may be pres5t$ ) gold %irt-/uds1 cuff-l9ks or r+s4 ,gold s]vices1 gold *as$ cups1 gold5 goblets & gold5 c&le /icks are mo/ appropriate4 ,! d9n] %\ld be elaborate4 ,a huge w$d+ cake1 inscrib$ ) a fro/+ ( ! surnames & w$d+ date ( ! c\ple is wor?y ( hold+ ! place ( honor 9 ! c5t] ( ! table4 ,once aga9 ! bride enjoys ! privilege ( be+ ! fir/ to cut ! cake--& 9 or ) ea* slice t is giv5 to ! gue/s !re %\ld be "s little gold5 tok51 a r+ or ?imble or t9y jewel box4 ,if ?is is too co/ly1 a gold5 fl[] su* z a daffodil may be plac$ on ea* plate4 ,a beautiful & t\*+ s5tim5t to be obs]v$ on ! gold5 w$d+ is = ! bride to we> some?+ f h] w$d+ day4 ,p]haps x is a treasur$ bit ( ! bridal veil4 ,p]haps x is a fan1 or a pair ( gloves1 or ev5 ! w$d+ dress itself4 ,%e also c>ries a b\quet ( :ite fl[]s--z %e did fifty ye>s ago on h] fir/ w$d+ day4 ,,! ,,gold5 ,,w$d+ ,a ,,glori\s ,,a*ievem5t ,beautiful inde$ is ! celebration ( ! gold5 w$d+4 ,) h] *ildr5 & gr&*ildr5 & fri5ds gr\p$ ar\nd h]1 ) h] husb& at h] side1 do+ h] e honor he might pay a newly-won bride1 ! bride ( fifty ye>s c be naught b inexpressibly happy--?\gh memories ( lo/ y\? rise con/antly to haunt h]4 ,x is glori\s--?is rea*+ fifty ye>s ( m>ri$ life--& any c\ple may well be pr\d to commemorate its occasion4 ,&1 aft] all1 isn't x happ9ess t makes life wor? :ile8 ,( :at use is weal? & p[] & position if we _c h ! ones we love1 ! ones :o love u8 ,! man & woman :o h liv$ toge!r 9 happy companion%ip = fifty ye>s h m 9 _! love ( ea* o!r ?an ! man :o has liv$ alone = fifty ye>s & amass$ trem5d\s ri*es4 ,,*apt] ,,vi ,,! ,,bride',s ,,outfit ,,orig9 ,,( ,,! ,,tr\sseau ,"o mu/ /udy ! m>riage cu/oms ( _m c\ntries be=e ! developm5t ( ! tr\sseau idea c be fully trac$4 ,b x is int]e/+--especially to ! bride--to discov] t at h] impressive m>riage c]emony to-day %e is m]ely repeat+ ! anci5t cu/oms ( h] ance/ors1 s v f> back t ,europe itself 0 n yet kn[n4 ,we f9d ! fir/ trace ( x 9 ! book ( ,g5esis 7,g54 xxiv4 #ec74 ,p]haps y rememb] ! /ory4 ,abraham's s]vant ,eliez] br\ght h&some jewels to ,rebecca z a seal to ! m>riage compact4 ,x is "o ( ! e>lie/ evid5ces ( outfitt+ = ! w$d+4 ,& !n we f9d a trace ( x among ! e>ly ,eskimos1 :]e ! bridegroom mu/ supply 8 bride ) all ! clo!s necess>y = ! honeymoon4 ,lat]1 9 ,r\mania1 we f9d ! clo!s & %oes are a v important "p ( ! gifts to ! bride4 ,l>gely f ! cu/oms practic$ 9 ?is latt] c\ntry1 b also f ,italy1 ,sw$51 & ,greece1 ! idea ( ! m>riage tr\sseau sprang4 ,! developm5t is mo/ m>k$ 9 ,r\mania4 ,"h we f9d ! t9ie/ girls1 "s ( !m z "y z five ye>s1 work+ on bridal f9]y--ea* "o /riv+ to outdo ! o!r 9 beauty & elaboration ( "w4 ,ea* f9i%$ article is laid c>efully away 9 a huge *e/1 until su* "t z a suitor appe>s4 ,9 days gone by1 ! bridegroom _h ! privilege ( exam9+ ! tr\sseau & decid+ :e!r or n x 0 complete1 & (t5 8 *oice re/$ ^u ! wor? ( ! bride's outfit4 ,p]haps x 0 because a complete outfit 0 s v necess>y to ! "y girl />t+ out ^u h] new duties z a wife t ! developm5t ( ! tr\sseau has be5 s rapid4 ,9 ! ye> #acjh1 at ! w$d+ ( ,edw>d ,,ii to ,isabella ( ,france1 ! tr\sseau play$ an important "p inde$4 ,"h is a description ( ! bride's outfit1 z tak5 f ,e4 ,l4 ,url9's book1 ,a ,%ort ,hi/ory ( ,m>riage3 ,%e 7,isabella7 br\ght two gold cr[ns ornam5t$ ) gems1 gold & silv] dr9k+ vessels1 gold5 spoons & fifty silv] plates4 ,h] dresses 7 made ( gold & silv] /uff1 velvet & taffetas4 ,%e _h six dresses ( gre5 clo?1 six ( rose sc>let & _m co/ly furs4 ,= l95 %e _h #dai y>ds1 & ! tape/ries = h] *amb] 7 elaborate ) ! arms ( ,engl& & ,france wov5 9 gold4 ,elaborate1 yes1 & c]ta9ly fit = a que54 ,b p]haps we f9d ! tr\sseaux ( our misses ( ! tw5tie? c5tury m int]e/+6 ,,! ,,tr\sseau ,,( ,,to-,,day ,x w\ld be ridicul\s to attempt to li/ ! articles t mu/ be includ$ 9 ! tr\sseau ( ! bride ( to-day4 ,?is matt] mu/ be entirely dep5d5t ^u circum/ances1 means & conv5i5ce4 ,!re c be no def9ite set ( rules to gov]n ! cont5ts ( "o's w$d+ outfit4 ,b !re are c]ta9 conv5tionalities we c discuss t may be ( value to ! bride 9 prep>+ = h] w$d+4 ,!re is1 ( c\rse1 some?+ v beautiful 9 ! ?\ght ( mak+ "o's tr\sseau entirely by h&4 ,& !re is an old tradition ab\t sew+ happ9ess into ! w$d+ outfit t brides l to believe4 ,b :5 we glance at ! %op w9d[s ) _! lavi% displays ( ! da9tie/ creations1 & :5 we ?9k ( ! pr(essional modi/e ) h] develop$ s5se ( ! arti/ic1 we mu/ admit t x is n a practical cu/om4 ,x us$ to be ! practice = ea* "y girl to h a hope *e/ into :i* %e put l95s1 etc41 aga9/ ! w$d+ day4 ,?is 0 dur+ ! "t :5 mo/ ( ! tr\sseaux 7 made by h&4 ,x seems r a fooli% wa/e ( "t = ! girl ( mod]ate means to sit = endless h\rs sew+ on r[s & r[s ( lace :5 ma*9e made g>m5ts may be _h at reasonable figures4 ,if %e *ooses h] ?+s c>efully !y w be> ! /amp ( h] p]sonality almo/ z mu* z if %e _h fa%ion$ !m h]self2 &1 ( c\rse1 !re are _m f9i%+ t\*es t %e c add :i* make ! ?+s peculi>ly h] own1 su* z initials & monograms1 cro*et$ edges1 etc4 ,x is gratify+ to note t ! tr\sseau ( to-day does n conta9 su* frilly1 useless ?+s z did ! tr\sseaux ( our gr&mo!rs' "t4 ,l95s boa/ deep folds ( ! mat]ial & neat hem/it*+ in/ead ( huge bord]s & ins]ts ( lace4 ,"u-?+s are made & b\ght ) a reg>d = we> & utility1 r ?an m]ely to be pretty to look at4 ,! entire outfit %[s a t5d5cy to be m useful & less ornam5tal4 ,:i* is1 ( c\rse1 z x %\ld be4 ,& n[ let u consid] "s ( ! m important items to be includ$4 ,,ab\t ,,! ,,l95s ,9 select+ h] l95s ! bride %\ld pay p>ticul> att5tion to quality2 ! am\nt %e buys dep5ds ^u ! size ( ! new home1 & ^u ! means at h] comm&4 ,!re mu/ be %eets & pill[-cases2 ba? t[els & kit*5 t[els1 napk9s & table-cov]s4 ,if %e is fond ( h&work1 !re may be h&-embroid]$ l95s = ! b$-spreads1 h&-embroid]$ l95 sc>fs & h&-embroid]$ c5t]pieces ( l954 ,"o bride we "k includ$ a tw5ty-y>d bol/] ( uncut l95 9 h] tr\sseau 9 addition to ! items m5tion$ above4 ,if "o c af=d x1 x is be/ to />t out ) a g5]\s supply ( l95s1 z someh[ ! old] !y gr[1 ! long] we h !m1 ! m preci\s !y become4 ,l95s are usually initial$4 ,:5 h\sehold & p]sonal l95s are m>k$1 !y be> ! initials ( ! bride's maid5 "n4 ,t[els = ! ba? are m>k$ ) a s+le initial 9 :ite or color$ ?read1 to mat* ! bord]4 ,table-cov]s1 if initial$ at all1 h ! lett]s plac$ 9 ! c5t]1 half-way betwe5 ! middle & edge ( ! table2 napk9s are initial$ 9 ! corn]4 ,:ite l95s are inv>iably initial$ 9 :ite4 ,,= ,,! ,,bride ,girl1 d n exult 9 ?y w$d+ dress2 see h[ mu* tr\ble lurks beh9d x1 says an old ,syrian prov]b4 ,b :]e is ! little ,am]ican bride :o does n exult 9 h] da9ty w$d+ ?+s--:o does n glory 9 ! silks & cottons & laces & ribbons ( h] tr\sseau8 ,always a lov] ( ! beautiful--especially 9 clo!s--%e f9ds a new *>m 9 ^! pretty ?+s t port5d s mu* happ9ess to come4 ,!re are h] und]?+s--s(t1 frivol\s1 mu*-b]ibbon$ *emises1 camisoles & petticoats4 ,"s are ( practical musl9 or s(t1 cr9kly crpe4 ,o!rs are ( ri* crpe-de-*9e1 & lately1 knitt$ und]g>m5ts ( silk are favor$4 ,!n1 !re are ! dresses1 h] *ief delight4 ,!re is "o sm>t /reet dress ( s]ge or poiret twill2 an aft]noon frock or two ( taffeta1 georgette or sat9 z %e pref]s2 "o elaborate ev5+ g[n = important occasions1 & "o v mu* less elaborate = semi-ev5+ affairs4 ,& if %e is a wise bride1 %e w include a sm>t d>k-color$ suit1 ) sev]al fluffy little bl\ses4 ,!n1 ( c\rse1 !re are ! crisp1 neat1 becom+ little frocks = ! morn+-at-home4 ,b %e %\ld n make ! mi/ake1 :i* is all too common to brides1 ( gett+ sev]al times z mu* z %e ne$s4 ,o!r details1 su* z hose1 %oes & hats are be/ decid$ by ! bride h]self4 ,9 fact1 ! entire tr\sseau mu/ be det]m9$ by ! bride 9 proportion to su* important consid]ations z h] means1 ! l5g? ( ! honeymoon1 & ! di/ance ( ! trip %e expects to make4 ,! items above 7 (f]$ z a sugge/ion1 & "o may add or detract accord+ to ! dictates ( common s5se4 ,x is sugge/$1 h[ev]1 t ! tr\sseau be small & c>efully select$1 r ?an l>ge & exp5sive1 = ! fa%ions are con/antly *ang+ & n ev5 s mom5t\s an occasion z "o's w$d+ w>rants he$less extravagance4 ,,! ,,w$d+ ,,dress ,! orig9 ( ! :ite g[n = ! bride is n v difficult to trace4 ,:ite1 s9ce "t immemorial1 has be5 ! color us$ to d5ote purity4 ,:ite animals1 9 c]ta9 c\ntries1 are held sacr$1 j z ! :ite fl[]s are sacr$ else:]e4 ,! exclusive use ( :ite = ! bride is suppos$ to h gr[n out ( an old cu/om ( ! ,patagonians1 :o cov] ! body ) :ite pa9t on ! eve ( ! w$d+ c]emony4 ,to-day ! keynote ( ! w$d+ g[n is simplicity4 ,! days ( elaborate g[ns ) tra9s s heavy ) ! weight ( preci\s jewels t eight girls _h to c>ry !m1 is ov]4 ,! s5sible ,am]ican bride kn[s t simplicity is m becom+ to ! solemn dignity ( ! occasion ?an extremely elaborate dress4 ,) /yles con/antly *ang+ z !y d1 x w\ld be ( no value to (f] any description "h4 ,h[ev]1 ?is little item1 tak5 f ! ann\ncem5t ( a fa%ionable w$d+ rec5tly held1 may (f] "s helpful sugge/ions3 ,! g[n 9 :i* ,miss ---- became ! ,c\ntess ---- 0 ( heavy :ite sat9 cut ) an almo/ au/]e simplicity4 ,! drap]y ( ! skirt 0 m>k$ ) a g>l& ( lilies & orange-blossoms4 ,! tulle veil 0 bord]$ ) old ,engli% po9t lace1 an heirloom ( ! ---- family4 ,f a /udy ( ! descriptions ( o!r bridal g[ns at rec5t important w$d+s1 we f9d t sat9 is )\t d\bt ! favorite mat]ial4 ,crpe-de-*9e & heavy :ite brocade are also us$2 & ! bride may select :i*ev] mat]ial %e likes be/1 some?+ s(t & cl++ unless %e is incl9$ to be too sl5d]1 :5 taffeta is m suitable4 ,und\bt$ly1 no matt] :at ! /yle ( ! g[n happ5s to be1 x %\ld boa/ a tra92 & a drap$ skirt is always a popul> w$d+ mode4 ,! l5g? ( ! sleeves & skirt is entirely gov]n$ by ! fa%ion ( ! mom5t4 ,:ite sat9 slipp]s & :ite gloves enhance ! simple beauty ( ! w$d+ g[n4 ,jewels are r>ely worn1 except1 p]haps1 "o l>ge gem--a gift ( ! groom4 ,,! ,,bride',s ,,veil ,accord+ to ! m>riage rites ( ! anci5t ,hebrews1 orda9$ 9 days :5 m>riage itself 0 unkn[n 9 _m c\ntries1 a canopy mu/ be held ov] ! bride & groom by f\r intimate fri5ds ( ! family4 ,lat]1 we f9d t ?is cu/om among ! e>ly ,hebrews1 presag$ an ,anglo-,saxon cu/om ( erect+ a c>e clo? 7a squ>e ve/m5t7 above ! bride & groom4 ,out ( ?is develop$ t ( cov]+ ! bride alone2 to-day ! beautiful bridal veil is ! result ( ^? anci5t cu/oms4 ,n s long ago1 ! veil 0 ( tulle1 & f ! top ( ! bride's head x fell ov] h] %\ld]s1 completely envelop+ h] to ! v tips ( h] %oes4 ,?is all-envelop+ veil is no long] consid]$ good =m4 ,9 its place1 is ! v *>m+ veil t is ga!r$ into a becom+1 fl[]-trimm$ cr[n at ! back ( h] head1 fall+ gracefully to ! tra9 ( ! dress1 leav+ ! face entirely uncov]$4 ,! veil is always ( filmy mat]ial4 ,tulle is favor$2 & lace is p>ticul>ly beautiful1 especially if x is old lace t has be5 a long "t 9 ! bride's family4 ,h[ev]1 tulle is pref]able to imitation lace4 ,orange blossoms or t9y lilies-(-!-valley may be entw9$ ar\nd ! cr[n ( ! head1 a spray or two ne/l+ 9 ! folds ( ! veil4 ,,w$d+ ,,fl[]s ,important1 inde$1 is ! bride's b\quet4 ,_m a delicate fl[] press$ betwe5 ! leaves ( a book & *]i%$ 9 m9d & he>t alike is sil5t & eloqu5t pro( ( ?is fact4 ,! mo/ conv5tional =m is ! %[] b\quet4 ,?is is a v]itable cascade ( fl[]s & ribbon2 :ite roses1 orange-blossoms or lilies-(-!-valley--or a comb9ation ( all ?ree--are mass$ toge!r 9 ! c5t]1 entw9$ ) n>r[ sat9 ribbon4 ,f ?is he>t ( fl[]s l5g?s ( ribbon w\nd ar\nd individual fl[]s trail almo/ to ! hem ( ! bride's g[n4 ,x produces a mo/ *>m+ effect4 ,(t5 an ord9>y b\quet ( fl[]s is c>ri$1 :i* is j z pretty if n z elaborate z ! %[] b\quet4 ,gre5 foliage is1 ( c\rse1 p]missible2 b !re is a t5d5cy aga9/ fl[]s ( bright hues4 ,appe>+ entirely 9 :ite1 is "o ( ! cu/oms :i*1 ord9>ily1 ! bride %\ld obs]ve1 n only = ! traditions wov5 ar\nd x1 b ! sugge/ions ( sweet dignity1 purity & girli%ness t are associat$ ) x4 ,lilies are appeal+ bridal fl[]s = ?is same reason4 ,an exception is ! civil w$d+1 or ! hurri$1 simple w$d+ :5 ! bride is attir$ 9 travel+ co/ume4 ,b ?is w be tak5 up 9 detail 9 a lat] p>agraph4 ,,dress ,,( ,,! ,,maid ,,( ,,honor ,sat9 is ! mo/ favor$ mat]ial = ! dress ( ! maid ( honor4 ,x may be :ite1 trimm$ ) pale colors1 or x may be entirely pale p9k or pale blue or "s o!r becom+ color4 ,on no occasion may ! maid ( honor be dress$ 9 pure :ite4 ,h] dress is always diff]5t f ^? worn by ! bridesmaids4 ,! /yle is a matt] ( ta/e & preval5t fa%ion4 ,if ! w$d+ takes place at noon 9 a *ur*1 ! g[n is ei!r sleeveless or ) v %ort sleeves1 & x may or may n h a tra91 accord+ to ! ta/e ( ! we>]4 ,l ! bride1 %e we>s :ite gloves & c>ries fl[]s4 ,if ! w$d+ is held 9 ! aft]noon or ev5+1 at home1 ! maid ( honor's g[n is less =mal4 ,x may be a da9ty aft]noon frock ( taffeta or sat91 sometimes embroid]$ georgette dresses are worn--t is1 = ! aft]noon alone4 ,:5 x is 9 ! ev5+1 a silk g[n may be worn4 ,,m>ry+ ,,9 ,,travel+ ,,dress ,v (t51 :5 a w$d+ takes place be=e twelve o'clock1 or :5 because ( a diff]5ce ( religi\s op9ion ! c]emony is p]=m$ by a ,ju/ice ( ! ,peace1 or :5 ! w$d+ is to be a v simple "o1 or :5 = a numb] ( o!r possible reasons ! bride wi%es x %e we>s a sm>t travel+ suit in/ead ( ! :ite w$d+ g[n4 ,! suit %\ld be cons]vative 9 /yle & color4 ,fl[]s %\ld be 9 ! =m ( a corsage4 ,nei!r b\quets nor cut fl[]s are c>ri$ :5 "o is 9 travel+ co/ume4 ,in/ead ( a suit a dress may be worn b x mu/ be an attractive aft]noon frock or /reet dress1 n an ev5+ dress ( any sort4 ,:5 ! bride is a wid[ m>ry+ = ! second "t h] dress is *>act]iz$ by extreme simplicity :e!r ! w$d+ takes place 9 ! aft]noon or ev5+4 ,,*apt] ,,vii ,,fun]als ,,fun]al ,,cu/oms ,!re is no m eloqu5t comm5t>y on ! vanity ( human wi%es ?an ! pomp & c]emony :i*1 s9ce ! fir/ syllable ( record$ "t h att5d$ fun]al s]vices4 ,k+s & emp]ors h erect$ spl5did mausoleums 9 :i* !y & _! families might be buri$1 ,ph>aohs h kept slaves at "w = tw5ty ye>s on a pyramid b5ea? ^: /ones _! bones might re/1 savages 9 lonely =e/s h build$ great m\nds "u :i* _! *iefs may wait = ! "t to g to ! ,happy ,hunt+ gr\nds4 ,slave & emp]or1 pr9ce & paup]--x is all ! same4 ,la/ week 9 ,new ,york a woman di$ 9 ! w>d :]e !y treat pati5ts free ( *>ge1 yet = m ?an fifte5 ye>s %e _h be5 pay+ premiums on an insurance policy :i* w\ld p]mit h] to h a fun]al z good z anybody's fun]al4 ,?ree weeks ago a boy 9 a small t[n 9 ,i[a sp5t ne>ly all he _h 9 defray+ ! exp5ses ( ! fun]al ( 8 "m4 ,9 ?is case1 & inde$ 9 _m ano!r1 a simple c]emony w\ld h be5 f> m appropriate1 = ev5 9 pay+ ! la/ tributes ( respect to ! dead !re mu/ be ! sav+ grace ( common s5se4 ,x is l salt--ev]y?+ is ! bett] = a p9* ( x4 ,rec5tly a c&idate = ! ,doctor's degree at "o ( ! l>ge/ univ]sities 9 ! c\ntry *ose = ! subject ( 8 !sis ,fun]al ,cu/oms ?r\gh\t ! ,ages4 ,x is too l>ge a subject = u to ent] into "h1 & x w\ld pr(it u little1 = ! day ( hir$ m\rn]s & spl5did pageantry toge!r ) obtrusive music & gorge\s fl[]s is pa/4 ,simplicity *>act]izes ! entire s]vice among well-br$ p ev]y:]e4 ,! music is s(t & ! fl[]s 9 _m cases are s5t to ! hospitals :]e !y may gladd5 ! suff]]s !re in/ead ( be+ all[$ to wilt neglect$ on ! grave4 ,m (t5 ?an n1 n[adays1 !re is add$ to ! notice ( ! fun]al :i* is ins]t$ 9 ! newspap]s ! s5t5ce1 ,please omit fl[]s4 ,ev5 9 ! mo/ primitive times x 0 felt t ! dead 7 go+ =? on a long1 long j\rney f :i* !y w\ld nev] return1 & _! fri5ds want$ to d :atev] !y c\ld to spe$ !m along ! way4 ,x 0 9 ?is mann] t ! cu/om ( (f]+ gifts to ! dead came ab\t4 ,^! gifts range all ! way f food & h\sehold ut5sils to clo?+1 weapons & money4 ,! money 0 sometimes gold1 sometimes silv] & sometimes pap]1 b 9 mo/ in/ances x 0 to s]ve z a tip to ! f]ryman :o 0 to r[ !m across ! riv] t sep>ates ?is life f ! next4 ,,! ,,fun]al ,,( ,,to-,,day ,n long ago a ,new ,york newspap] devot$ a full page 9 its magaz9e section to an article call$ ,a ,k+'s ,"m ,buri$4 ,! purpose ( ! article 0 to reveal =cibly ! mock]y ( "s ( our elaborate fun]als ( to-day1 & %[ h[ !y are proportionately no m civiliz$ ?an ^? b>b>\s rituals ( ! e>ly days4 ,! /ory is wor?y ( repetition "h4 ,a c]ta9 savage que5 0 murd]$ by h] son4 ,to conv9ce ! p t %e _h di$ a natural dea?1 ! son made h] burial especially elaborate & impressive4 ,fir/ a huge hole 0 dug 9 ! gr\nd1 9 :i* ! dead que5 0 plac$ 9 an upright position4 ,beside h] 0 plac$ a l>ge jug ( wat]4 ,& into ?is great hole 7 plac$ also t5 "y girls1 :o 7 to be buri$ alive to accompany ! dead que5 ^u h] j\rney4 ,! hole 0 !n cov]$ ) e>?1 & above x ?\s&s ( m5 7 set to fight+ ea* o!r until ! gr\nd 0 soak$ ) blood4 ,?is 0 n only to honor ! dead que51 b to keep ill-luck away f ! k+4 ,y are horrifi$ :5 y read ab\t ?is savage burial4 ,y wond] at ! sup]/iti\s ignorance t all[s t5 girls to be buri$ alive1 & ?\s&s ( "y m5 to be slaught]$1 m]ely 9 honor ( a murd]$ que5 & h] brutal son4 ,b consid]+ ! k ( ^? savages & our k to-day1 _! education & our education1 we f9d t we are entitl$ to no excessive praise4 ,! fun]als to-day are (t5 comp>atively z ridicul\s & unciviliz$1 ?\gh ! t5d5cy is c]ta9ly t[>d bett] ?+s4 ,to give "o specific in/ance1 !re is ! wid[ :o sp5ds e doll> left h] by a dep>t$ husb& to pay = an elaborate fun]al = him4 ,9 ! eyes ( ! _w1 he mu/ be buri$ "r2 & ?\gh x leaves h] 9 debt1 %e makes an impressive fun]al s]vice4 ,w\ld x n h be5 m s5sible to bury him simply & uno/5tati\sly1 pres]v+ a little ( ! money left h] = ! necessities ( life8 ,x is "o ( ! ironies ( life t (t5 m att5tion & honor are paid to ! dead ?an !y ev] receive 9 life4 ,if we /udy pres5t-day fun]als c>efully we w f9d t !y h mu* 9 common ) ^? savage burials ( o!r days4 ,x is because we d ?+s m]ely because o!rs did ! same ?+s be=e u4 ,we h c]ta9 beliefs because tradition says !y are true1 & !re=e1 no matt] h[ absurd !y are1 !y are "r1 & we mu/ hold to !m ) ! same f]vor ( conviction t makes ! savage cl+ to 84 ,,:5 ,,dea? ,,ent]s ,,! ,,family ,aside f its psy*ological aspects--^? entail+ fe>1 sup]/ition & ! belief 9 religi\s & traditional cu/oms--dea? br+s ) x he>ta*e & sorr[4 ,to lose a belov$ "o 9 dea? is to be consci\s ( ! intangible some?+ t b9ds ! _w toge!r1 & ^u :i* all civilization is bas$4 ,we call x love2 & we "k t x is ! deepe/ tie ( affection--inde$1 ! deepe/ emotion--( :i* human nature is capable4 ,& s1 dea? br+s ) x sorr[ & mis]y4 ,^? ( u :o are mo/ directly conc]n$ c ?9k ( no rules ( etiquette1 no cu/oms ( good society1 :5 we are suff]+ a deep b]eavem5t4 ,we ?9k only ( our great loss1 & ( our great sorr[4 ,t is :y x is necess>y = u all to "k ! rules ( correct conduct1 s t :5 dea? does ent] our h\sehold we w in/9ctively d :at is correct4 ,x is a te/ l ?is t %[s innate good bre$+4 ,"o great rule to rememb]1 = ^? :o come 9 contact ) p :o h lo/ a belov$ memb] ( ! family1 is t sorr[ is sacr$1 & t x is "o ( ! mo/ un=givable brea*es ( good behavior to intrude ^u x4 ,a note ( condol5ce1 or a brief visit is a necess>y social duty2 b con/ant intrusion ^u grief is z unk9d & inconsid]ate z x is ill-br$4 ,,tak+ ,,*>ge ,! _w ov]1 fun]al cu/oms h "o factor 9 common3 ! belief t ! dead man has n ceas$ to live4 ,?is belief f9ds expression 9 rites & c]emonies4 ,x is = ?is reason t fun]al & m\rn+ practices are highly conv5tional4 ,ano!r reason1 p]haps1 is because dea? is a %ock1 & a r\nd ( conv5tional c]emonies alleviates t /ra9$ feel+ dur+ ! p]iod ( readju/m5t4 ,?us1 ! memb]s ( ! b]eav$ family %\ld be left z ne>ly alone to _! grief z possible4 ,no?+ 9 ! nature ( bus9ess %\ld be ?ru/ ^u !m4 ,a male memb] ( ! family %\ld take complete *>ge2 or ! imm$iate duties may be left 9 ! h&s ( ! ne>e/ outside relatives4 ,b :oev] does take *>ge %\ld see t ! family is n tr\bl$ ) ! m9or details1 & t ! fun]al c]emony is c>ri$ out accord+ to ! family's preconfid$ wi%es4 ,! duties ( ! p]son1 or p]sons1 :o take *>ge are _m & v>i$4 ,! fir/ duty is to see t all ! bl9ds are drawn & t ! door-bell is muffl$4 ,prop] ann\ncem5ts mu/ be made 9 ! newspap]s1 pall-be>]s mu/ be select$1 & ! arrangem5ts mu/ be made ) ! sexton = ! fun]al itself4 ,! cl]gyman :o is to (ficiate mu/ be int]view$ & all ! details conc]n+ s]vices1 music & decorations ( ! *ur* mu/ be det]m9$4 ,^u ! p]son 9 *>ge also re/s ! duty ( see+ t ! und]tak] does n take advantage ( 8 au?ority to ! ext5t ( mak+ ! fun]al unduly lavi%4 ,x is )9 ! p[] ( ! p]son :o takes *>ge at a fun]al to mitigate consid]ably ! grief ( ! family4 ,& x is a s]vice t ! family w n soon =get4 ,,ann\nc+ ,,! ,,dea? ,mod]n fun]al cu/oms dem& a few l9es 9 ! newspap]s mak+ public ann\ncem5t ( a dea?4 ,att5dant c]emonies are also includ$ = ! b5efit ( fri5ds & acqua9tances ( ! family4 ,foll[+ is a typical ann\ncem5t ( a dea?1 copi$ ) only a *ange 9 names f ! newspap]3 ,radcliff--,at h] resid5ce1 #daj ,we/ ,fiftie? ,/reet1 ,rose ,spey] ,radcliff1 daught] ( ,james & ,hel5 ,wilson ,spey]1 & belov$ wife ( ,rob]t ,l4 ,radcliff4 ,fun]al s]vices 9 ! ,*apel ( ,/4 ,b>?olomew's ,*ur*1 ,p>k ,av5ue & ,fiftie? ,/reet1 ,new ,york ,city1 on ,saturday morn+1 #aa o'clock4 ,int]m5t at ,wat]bury1 ,conn4 ,:5 an ann\ncem5t ( ?is k9d appe>s 9 ! newspap]s all fri5ds & relatives ( ! family are expect$ to appe> at ,/4 ,b>?olomew's ,*ur* on ,saturday morn+ at #aa o'clock to att5d ! s]vices4 ,if ! words ,fun]al private or ,int]m5t private are add$ to ! ann\ncem5t1 x is ! height ( ill-bre$+ = any except v intimate fri5ds & relatives to be pres5t4 ,v (t5 ! reque/ ,k9dly omit fl[]s1 or ,please omit fl[]s is add$ to ! ann\ncem5t ( a dea?4 ,9 ?is ev5t x is /ill ! privilege ( a fri5d to s5d fl[]s to "s memb] ( ! family or to ! family z a :ole aft] ! fun]al c]emony has tak5 place4 ,,"s ,,necess>y ,,prep>ations ,:]e !re are s]vants1 "o %\ld be /ation$ at ! door to receive c>ds & messages4 ,o!rwise ?is duty devolves ^u ! p]son :o is tak+ *>ge4 ,! s]vant %\ld we> a black g[n1 :ite coll> & cuffs & a :ite apron & :ite cap ) black ribbons4 ,if a man-s]vant is /ation$ at ! door he we>s a complete black liv]y4 ,) ! gr[+ ta/e = privacy & simplicity1 _m ( ! fooli% demon/rations ( grief1 express$ 9 outw>d display1 h be5 elim9at$4 ,x is n[ a v r>e occurr5ce = ! room 9 :i* ! dead body lies to be fill$ ) wrea?s & masses ( fl[]s1 = p are beg9n+ to realize t ?is is a relic ( anci5t & savage burial cu/oms1 & t x is n s mu* a manife/ation ( grief z a display ( vanity4 ,( c\rse x is a pretty way ( express+ s5tim5t to s5d a floral (f]+ to "s "o :o has di$2 b mod]n pr9ciples ( good conduct acclaim x bett] ta/e1 & c]ta9ly m dignifi$1 to express ^! s5tim5ts ( reg>d 9 "s o!r way4 ,a %ort expression ( sorr[ appe>+ z a semi-public ann\ncem5t 9 ! newspap] aft] ! ann\ncem5t ( ! dea? may be (f]$ by a gr\p ( fri5ds or bus9ess associates b x is n good =m = a memb] ( ! family ( ! deceas$ to ins]t su* an ann\ncem5t 9 ! pap]s4 ,family grief is private2 & publicity *eap5s x4 ,! somb] crpe ann\nc+ to ! _w t a dea? has occurr$ 9 ! family is also fa/ becom+ a ?+ ( ! pa/4 ,"o c easily see 9 ?is cu/om ( crpe-hang+ a relic ( t cu/om ( anci5t ,patagonia t requir$ all belong+s ( ! deceas$ to be pa9t$ black4 ,ev5 ! body ( ! p]son :o di$ 0 cov]$ ) black pa9t4 ,! black crpe ( to-day is m]ely ano!r =m ( t same cu/om4 ,n[1 in/ead ( ! broad black ribbon1 a wrea? or long sprays ( :ite or lilac fl[]s are entw9$ ar\nd ! fl[+ ends ( :ite ribbon4 ,?is is especially appropriate :5 ! deceas$ is a "y p]son--man or woman4 ,= a girl ( t5d] ye>s1 or = a v "y *ild1 a %eaf ( :ite roses or :ite c>nations ) :ite ribbons %\ld be us$2 roses & violets ) a :ite ribbon1 or roses ) a black ribbon d5ote ! dea? ( an old] unm>ri$ man or woman4 ,! pla9 crpe /ream]s are usually us$ = m>ri$ p4 ,cu/om /ill dem&s ?is fl[]-&-ribbon tribute to ! dead on ! door ( 8 or h] resid5ce1 b gradually ?is cu/om1 too1 w be relegat$ to ! =gott5 ?+s ( ! pa/4 ,,! ,,ladies ,,( ,,! ,,family ,a close fri5d or relative ( ! b]eav$ family %\ld make ! necess>y pur*ases = ! wom5 memb]s ( t family4 ,x is consid]$ bad =m = !m to be se5 abroad be=e ! fun]al4 ,a dressmak] %\ld be summon$ to ! h\se if ord]s are to be giv5 = m\rn+ dress4 ,! duty ( writ+ necess>y notes & see+ call]s also devolves ^u "s intimate relative or fri5d4 ,notes or lett]s writt5 9 ! "n ( ! family are on ei!r black-edg$ or pla9 :ite pap]1 & sign$ ) ! names ( ! p = :om !y are writt54 ,?us1 if ,mrs4 ,c>r's husb& has di$1 & h] c\s9 is att5d+ to ! incid5t prep>ations & duties1 ! notes & lett]s writt5 = ,mrs4 ,c>r w\ld be sign$ ) h] "n & n ! "n ( ! c\s91 b ) ! initials ( ! c\s9 b5ea? ! signature4 ,! ladies ( a b]eav$ family %\ld n see call]s1 ev5 ! mo/ intimate fri5ds1 unless !y are able to control _! grief4 ,x is a s\rce ( discom=t to ! visitor1 z well z to ! m\rn]1 to enact a sc5e ( semi-hy/]ia 9 ! draw+-room4 ,yet1 at a "t l ?is1 "o c h>dly be expect$ to be 9 full control ( "o's emotions4 ,!re=e x is always wise = ! wom5 to keep to _! rooms until aft] ! fun]al4 ,,! ,,pall-,,be>]s ,if a gu>d ( honor is to be appo9t$1 ! p]son 9 *>ge %\ld consult ! wi%es ( ! imm$iate family4 ,^? :o are ask$ to s]ve receive an invitation by note or by mess5g]1 s5t ei!r by ! head ( ! family ( ! deceas$ or by ! p]son 9 *>ge4 ,relatives are seldom appo9t$ z pall-be>]s4 ,a reque/ to s]ve z pall-be>] %\ld be refus$ only = ! mo/ imp]ative reasons4 ,! numb] & age ( ! pall-be>]s is a matt] ( ta/e & n ( obligation4 ,b x is consid]$ good =m to h six "y girls1 dress$ 9 :ite1 z ! gu>d ( honor = a "y girl or woman4 ,!y %\ld be select$ f among intimate fri5ds4 ,simil>ly1 six "y m5 are appropriate = a "y man :o has di$2 :ile = an eld]ly m>ri$ man1 eight g5tlem5 f among 8 close/ fri5ds & bus9ess associates =m ! usual gu>d ( honor4 ,! pall-be>]s1 9 ! invitation1 are told j :5 !y are expect$ to assemble at ! h\se ( ! deceas$1 & !y %\ld make x a p>ticul> po9t to be on "t4 ,!re c be no great] brea* ( good mann]s1 & 9 fact no great] unk9dness1 ?an to keep a fun]al p>ty wait+4 ,if ! pall-be>]s are to be wom51 ! c>riages or c>s may be s5t = !m individually2 b z a g5]al rule1 pall-be>]s are %[n to _! c>riage or c> be=e ! door1 :5 ! fun]al procession beg9s4 ,x is cu/om>y = all :o att5d a *ur* fun]al to assemble at ! *ur*1 b ?is rule does n p]ta9 to ! pall-be>]s4 ,!y are ! only ones :o accompany ! imm$iate family & relatives f ! h\se4 ,unless a special reque/ to ! contr>y has be5 made1 pall-be>]s may s5d fl[]s if !y wi%4 ,,duties ,,( ,,pall-,,be>]s ,a prompt answ] is necess>y ^u receipt ( an invitation to s]ve z pall-be>]4 ,illness or abs5ce f t[n at ! "t ( ! fun]al are ! only excuses = refus+ to accept ! invitation4 ,! writt5 answ] mu/ be foll[$ by a p]sonal call at ! home ( ! deceas$1 & c>ds mu/ be left4 ,=m]ly ! duty ( ! pall-be>] 0 to c>ry ! clo? or velvet pall t cov]$ ! c(f9--h5ce ! "n4 ,lat] ! cu/om develop$ into a m important duty--! pall-be>]s actually c>ri$ ! casket into & out ( ! *ur*4 ,?is is /ill done1 al?\gh n[ ! accept$ =m is = ! pall-be>]s to appe> solely z a gu>d ( honor = ! dead4 ,9 ?is latt] case1 !y walk be=e ! casket :i* is c>ri$ by ! und]tak]'s or sexton's assi/ants4 ,!y halt be=e ! he>se & /& 9 sil5t rev]5ce ) heads uncov]$1 :ile ! casket is be+ plac$ into x1 & aga9 :5 x is tak5 out to be convey$ into ! *ur*4 ,!y d n ent] _! c>s until ! he>se has pass$ on ahead4 ,ea* pall-be>] %\ld speak a few words ( condol5ce to ! memb]s ( ! b]eav$ family4 ,h[ev]1 he mu/ n make obvi\s ef=ts to obs]ve ?is duty1 nor mu/ he intrude ^u grief4 ,he (f]s 8 words ( com=t only :5 x is conv5i5t & :5 he is br\ght1 by 8 duties1 into ! pres5ce ( 8 sorr[+ fri5ds4 ,he %\ld be k9d1 & mo/ ( all1 tactful4 ,he %\ld n say any?+ t w cause a fre% outbur/ ( grief4 ,a few days aft] ! fun]al1 x is expect$ t ! pall-be>] call & leave 8 c>d = ! m\rn]s4 ,x is necess>y only = him to inquire at ! door aft] ! ladies & to leave 8 c>d4 ,x is m consid]ate n to ask to see ! memb]s ( ! family4 ,,! ,,*ur* ,,fun]al ,because x is closely alli$ ) religion1 ! fun]al c]emony is ne>ly always conduct$ at *ur*4 ,( c\rse ?is is some?+ entirely dep5d5t ^u conditions & p]sonal pref]5ces1 b ! *ur* fun]al is always m dignifi$ & impressive4 ,! pall-be>]s & ne>e/ relatives ( ! deceas$ assemble at ! h\se4 ,o!rwise1 all :o are to att5d ! fun]al assemble at ! *ur*4 ,! casket is borne f ! h\se by ! und]tak]'s assi/ants1 ! pall-be>]s prec$+ x two-by-two4 ,z soon z ! he>se drives (f1 ! pall-be>]s ent] ! c>riages or c>s imm$iately beh9d x1 & ! relatives foll[ 9 ! next c>s 9 ! ord] ( _! relation%ip4 ,:5 ! procession is ready to move1 ! music beg9s & ! casket is borne d[n ! aisle to ! alt> by ! sexton's assi/ants4 ,sometimes ! pall-be>]s c>ry ! casket to ! alt>4 ,,ord] ,,( ,,prec$5ce ,:5 att5d+ ! body ( _! *ild1 p>5ts walk arm 9 arm1 _! o!r *ildr5 foll[+ imm$iately beh9d !m 9 ! ord] ( s5iority4 ,pall-be>]s inv>iably prec$e ! casket4 ,a wid[ att5ds ! body ( h] husb& on ! arm ( h] elde/ son or daught]1 ) h] o!r *ildr5 j beh9d4 ,aft] !m come ! deceas$ man's p>5ts1 foll[$ by 8 bro!rs & si/]s4 ,simil>ly1 a wid[] foll[s ! body ( 8 wife att5d$ by 8 elde/ son or daught]4 ,*ildr5 foll[+ ! body ( _! only p>5t take prec$5ce accord+ to _! ages1 ! eld] always lead+4 ,a wid[ :o has no *ildr5 foll[s h] husb& on ! arm ( a bro!r or o!r ne> mascul9e relative4 ,dur+ ! s]vices at ! *ur*1 ! relatives occupy ! front pews on ! "r ( ! c5t] aisle4 ,! pall-be>]s sit 9 ! opposite pews on ! left-h& side4 ,aft] ! s]vices ! procession leaves ! *ur* 9 ! same ord] obs]v$ ^u ent]+4 ,if pray]s are to be (f]$ at ! grave1 ! c> ( ! cl]gyman foll[s imm$iately aft] ! he>se4 ,diff]5t religions h diff]5t burial s]vices1 b ^! are matt]s ( fai? r ?an ( etiquette4 ,,! ,,h\se ,,fun]al ,a h\se fun]al %\ld always be v simple4 ,few fl[]s are us$ by p ( good ta/e4 ,at a h\se fun]al1 a numb] ( fold+-*airs may be provid$ by ! und]tak]4 ,! casket is plac$ on a drap$ /& at "o end ( ! draw+-room1 su* fl[]s z are us$ be+ plac$ on & ar\nd x4 ,! room may or may n be d>k5$ accord+ to ! wi%es ( ! family4 ,ea* gue/ %\ld be greet$ at ! door by "s repres5tative ( ! family & %[n to a seat 9 ! draw+-room4 ,a r[ ( seats %\ld be res]v$ ne> ! casket = ! imm$iate family1 "o be+ set aside = ! cl]gyman :o is to (ficiate4 ,?\gh x is n obligatory x is v c\rte\s to s5d a c>riage or an automobile = him4 ,a ,prote/ant cl]gyman does n expect a fee b if he has come "s di/ance or if ! family wi%es to express _! ?anks 9 t mann] !y may (f] "o :i* he is privileg$ to accept ) p]fect propriety4 ,x is n necess>y to appo9t pall-be>]s = a home fun]al4 ,a quiet res]ve & dignity %\ld *>act]ize ! occasion1 & x %\ld be c>ri$ out ) ! greate/ am\nt ( exp$i5cy possible4 ,if music is desir$1 ! musicians or *ori/]s %\ld be 9 an adjac5t room & ! notes %\ld be v l[ & s(t4 ,wom5 d n remove _! wraps dur+ ! c]emony1 & m5 c>ry _! hats 9 _! h&s4 ,! wom5 memb]s ( ! b]eav$ family ent] on ! arms ( mascul9e relatives1 & if !y int5d go+ to ! cemet]y1 !y we> _! hats & veils4 ,! memb]s ( ! family1 h[ev]1 d n ent] ! draw+-room until ! cl]gyman arrives4 ,aft] ! c]emony ! gue/s quietly disp]se1 only ^? rema9+ :o int5d go+ to ! cemet]y4 ,x is n expect$ t expressions ( sympa?y be (f]$ on ?is occasion2 c>ds are left = ! family imm$iately aft] ! ann\ncem5t ( ! dea?1 & a call ( condol5ce is made1 accord+ to society's rules1 )9 a week aft] ! fun]al4 ,?us x is sup]flu\s to (f] sympa?y at ! s]vices1 unless "o is a v de> fri5d & wi%es p>ticul>ly to d s4 ,a ,,po9t ,,( ,,importance ,v (t5 ! wom5 ( ! family1 or p]haps j "o woman1 f9ds h] grief uncontrollable4 ,ev5 ?\gh ! fun]al is private1 & only relatives & close fri5ds are pres5t x is ! privilege ( ! b]eav$ to keep to h] room & f9d solace 9 solitude4 ,! _w w n c5sure h] = be+ abs5t2 x is a "t :5 petty conv5tions may safely be ov]look$4 ,:5 "o is griev+1 suff]+1 mis]able2 & pref]s to f9d peace alone1 )\t ! sympa?ies ( o!rs1 %e has e "r 9 ! _w to d s4 ,& %e is break+ no rules ( good conduct1 ei!r1 = p ( good bre$+ w recognize ! dep? ( h] ov]p[]+ grief4 ,surely x is bett] to rema9 away f ! s]vices ?an to g 9 a /ate ( hy/]ia4 ,:5 sorr[ is s poignant1 private home s]vices are usually held1 9 :i* case ! imm$iate memb]s ( ! family may ga!r 9 a room adjo9+ t 9 :i* ! gue/s are assembl$4 ,ev5 9 ! deepe/ grief x is possible to rememb] & obs]ve ! great law--be calm1 be sil5t & s]5e1 & te>s d n always mean sorr[1 nor l\d wail+1 grief4 ,,remov+ ,,signs ,,( ,,grief ,^u _! return f ! fun]al1 ! family %\ld f9d ! w9d[s op5 ) ! w>m sunlight /ream+ ?r\gh !m & all outw>d signs ( sorr[ remov$4 ,! ribbon & fl[]s on ! door are g5]ally tak5 d[n z soon z ! procession leaves4 ,9 ! h\se1 all signs ( ! b]eavem5t %\ld be effac$4 ,! furniture %\ld be plac$ 9 its usual ord]4 ,ev]y?+ connect$ ) ! fun]al mu/ be out ( sight4 ,! memb]s ( ! family %\ld be greet$ ) no?+1 ^u _! return1 t w\ld possibly give cause = fre% sorr[4 ,a consid]ate fri5d or relative %\ld /ay beh9d to att5d to ^! details4 ,x is n en\gh to leave ev]y?+ 9 ! h&s ( ! und]tak] & 8 assi/ants4 ,b ev5 relatives %\ld rememb] t ! b]eav$ ones w want to be by !mselves1 & t solitude is (t5 ! greate/ solace = grief4 ,,seclusion ,,dur+ ,,m\rn+ ,= ?ree weeks aft] a b]eavem5t1 wom5 seclude !mselves & receive no visitors except _! mo/ intimate fri5ds4 ,aft] ?is !y are expect$ to be suffici5tly resign$ to receive ! calls ( condol5ce ( _! fri5ds & acqua9tances4 ,!y !mselves make no visits until six mon?s aft] ! dea?4 ,:ile we>+ crpe veil & crpe-trimm$ g[ns1 a woman %\ld refra9 f tak+ "p 9 all social gaieties4 ,aft] ! crpe has be5 disc>d$1 %e may att5d conc]ts1 d9n]s & lun*eons1 & ! !at]2 b %e att5ds no l>ge social functions or fa%ionable d9n]s until at lea/ a ye> aft] ! date ( dea?4 ,! usual r\nd ( social duties1 includ+ balls & ! op]a1 are n resum$ until colors are once aga9 adopt$4 ,a man does n obs]ve ! etiquette ( m\rn+ z rigidly z 8 wife or daught]2 b x is necess>y to m5tion "h t x is exce$+ly bad =m = him to resume 8 active social duties1 su* z club d9n]s & ent]ta9m5ts1 ! !at]1 calls1 small d9n]s ) fri5ds1 until at lea/ two mon?s h elaps$4 ,if bus9ess p]mits1 he may obs]ve t5 days or two weeks ( absolute seclusion4 ,,dress ,,at ,,fun]als ,^? :o att5d ! fun]al %\ld n appe> 9 gay or brightly-color$ clo!s1 9 def]5ce = ! feel+s ( ! sorr[+ relatives4 ,wom5 :o we> simple1 unreliev$ black display an excell5t ta/e al?\gh any subdu$ color is equally good4 ,g5tlem5 %\ld we> ei!r complete suits ( black1 or ^? ( mat]ial d>k en\gh to be suit$ to ! solemnity ( ! occasion4 ,gray tr\s]s ) a black cutaway are p]missible4 ,a quiet hat1 gloves & necktie are worn4 ,vivid colors1 ei!r on a man or woman1 %[ a disreg>d = ! feel+ ( ! m\rn]s1 a lack ( respect = oneself1 & a di/9ct ignorance ( ! laws ( good conduct4 ,x is n a gala occasion & levity ( any sort is atroci\sly bad =m4 ,,int]m5t ,,& ,,cremation ,etiquette has no?+ to say ) reg>d to ! disposal ( ! body ( ! deceas$4 ,:e!r x is to be int]r$ or cremat$1 :e!r ! casket %all re/ 9 a grave or a vault or a mausoleum or :e!r ! a%es %all be pres]v$ 9 an urn or scatt]$ ^u a well-lov$ riv] or hill or ^u "s o!r *os5 spot is entirely a matt] ( p]sonal pref]5ce4 ,b etiquette unites ) ! laws ( beauty & ref9$ s5tim5t 9 prote/+ aga9/ ! erect+ ( hide\s monum5ts ) absurd inscriptions4 ,! purpose ( ! tomb/one is to m>k ! re/+ place & to be> ! "n & ! date ( ! bir? & dea? ( ! p]son :o lies b5ea? x4 ,if ! life itself has n left a record t w la/ a m>ble slab w n d mu* to p]petuate x4 ,sometimes !re is a special a*ievem5t or a m>k ( di/9ction :i* may ) propriety be cut into ! /one or ! family ( ! deceas$ may inscribe !reupon an expression ( _! grief or love2 b fl[]y inscriptions belong to ! pa/ & s9ce !re are no words t c adequately express ! grief ( a sorr[+ family = "o :o has di$ x is p]haps be/ n to attempt x4 ,! h\r at :i* ! int]m5t is to take place is appo9t$ to suit ! conv5i5ce ( ! family4 ,9 cities :]e a multiplicity ( duties makes att5dance 9 ! daytime difficult x is cu/om>y to h ev5+ s]vices1 b "u all o!r circum/ances ! fun]al is s*$ul$ to take place dur+ ! day4 ,,m\rn+ ,,dress ,grief turns in/9ctively to ! somb] g>m5ts ( m\rn+ = ! slight measure ( com=t :i* !y give1 b mod]n ideas ( enlight5$ civilization look ) disfavor on long crpe veils & any o!r =m ( m\rn+ t is s pron\nc$ z to be o/5tati\s4 ,black is v depress+1 especially to "y *ildr51 & a "m1 h[ev] deep h] sorr[ because ( ! dea? ( "o ( h] *ildr5 %\ld keep ?is 9 m9d & %\ld1 at any rate1 n we> black e day4 ,if %e likes %e may we> m\rn+ :5 %e leaves ! h\se4 ,x is a sort ( protection1 = /rang]s & ?\ghtless fri5ds w n be s likely to make rem>ks t w w\nd1 if !y h ! black dress to rem9d !m ( ! b]eavem5t :i* ! "m has suff]$4 ,"u any o!r circum/ances ! we>+ ( colors at home & black abroad is a =m ( hypocrisy1 & is1 ( c\rse1 to be deplor$4 ,black fabrics = m\rn+ %\ld n h a %9y f9i% nor %\ld !y be trimm$ except 9 ! simple/ way possible4 ,s]ge1 clo?1 duvetyn1 ,canton crpe1 pongee1 *iffon1 & georgette are appropriate b "o %\ld avoid velvets & mo/ fur trimm+s4 ,! mo/ suitable furs are pla9 black seal1 fox1 lynx1 etc41 ?\gh o!rs may be worn4 ,bright l9+s are n p]missible4 ,a woman 9 m\rn+ does n we> jewelry aside f ! w$d+ & engagem5t r+s4 ,dull b> p9s may be us$ :5ev] ne$$ & a broo*1 pla9 or set ) pe>l1 may be worn4 ,dress accessories %\ld be ( dull black1 purse1 gloves1 etc4 ,h&k]*iefs may h a black bord] or !y may be pure :ite4 ,! l5g? ( ! m\rn+ p]iod dep5ds ^u ! tie :i* exi/$ betwe5 ! deceas$ & ! b]eav$4 ,except = an eld]ly woman ^: husb& has di$ & :o nev] int5ds tak+ (f black ! longe/ p]iod is usually two ye>s1 ! fir/ 9 deep m\rn+1 ! next 9 second m\rn+ dur+ :i* "t gray1 lav5d]1 purple & black-&-:ite may be worn4 ,?is may be %ort5$ at discretion to six mon?s ( deep m\rn+ foll[$ by six mon?s ( semi-m\rn+ or ?ree mon?s ( deep m\rn+ & six ( half m\rn+4 ,! *ange f black to colors %\ld nev] be s abrupt z to be />tl+4 ,a girl does n we> m\rn+ = h] fianc except "u ext5uat+ circum/ances4 ,if he di$ on ! eve ( ! w$d+ x is p]missible b if ! date = ! w$d+ _h n be5 set or if ! engagem5t _h n be5 ann\nc$ x is que/ionable =m = h] to g into m\rn+ = him4 ,x is a v delicate matt] & ! f9al c\rt ( appeals is ! "y lady h]self4 ,b %e %\ld rememb] t ! g>m5ts ( m\rn+ are aft] all only a symbol ( grief & %e %\ld hesitate a long "t be=e assum+ !m4 ,h] m\rn+ outfit is l t ( a wid[ & %e we>s x = ! same l5g? ( "t4 ,*ildr5 %\ld nev] we> black4 ,^u ! dea? ( a p>5t !y may we> :ite p]haps reliev$ by lav5d] = six mon?s or s4 ,!y d n use m\rn+ /ation]y & !y d n c>ry black bord]$ h&k]*iefs4 ,a girl fifte5 or sixte5 may we> delicate grays1 lav5d]s1 & mix$ goods z well z :ite1 b %e %\ld n we> black4 ,!re is no iron-clad rule conc]n+ m\rn+1 & "o may or may n we> x4 ,ev5 a wid[1 a daught]1 or a "m is "u no compulsion to d s1 ?\gh to appe> 9 bright colors %ortly aft] ! dea? ( a belov$ "o is c]ta9ly an evid5ce ( bad ta/e4 ,,m\rn+ ,,dress ,,= ,,m5 ,! m\rn+ outfit = m5 is n s pron\nc$ z t = wom54 ,a black suit ) dull black %oes1 black gloves & :ite l95 con/itutes fir/ m\rn+4 ,_m m5 use only ! black b& ar\nd ! coat sleeve4 ,! cu/om grew out ( ! ,engli% practice ( hav+ ! s]vants we> ! black b& 9 h\seholds t c\ld n af=d a complete m\rn+ outfit1 & = ?is reason has met ) disfavor among ! fa/idi\s 9 ?is c\ntry4 ,x has ?is mu* 9 its favor3 x accompli%es ! purpose ( full m\rn+ ) ! add$ virtue ( economy1 & :5 "o's life has to be conduct$ on a frugal scale x is bett] to we> ! simple black b& ?an to sp5d "o's sub/ance fooli%ly = m\rn+4 ,a wid[] we>s m\rn+ = a ye> or a ye> & a half :ile a man griev+ = "s o!r relative ?an 8 wife may we> m\rn+ a ye> or six mon?s z he pref]s4 ,fir/ m\rn+ consi/s ( a suit ( black ) :ite l951 & dull accessories su* z %oes1 gloves1 cuff l9ks1 etc4 ,! hat may h a crpe bord] b x %\ld n be a v wide "o4 ,= second m\rn+ 8 suit is ( gray or black1 ) gray gloves1 :ite l951 etc4 ,m5 %\ld nev] c>ry black bord]$ h&k]*iefs4 ,a man we>s m\rn+ = a wife1 a *ild1 a p>5t1 or a bro!r or si/] ! l5g? ( "t dep5d+ ^u ! /r5g? ( ! bond :i* held !m toge!r4 ,,m\rn+ ,,/ation]y ,:ite /ation]y ( a good quality is correct = all occasions & m\rn+ is no exception4 ,t :i* has a n>r[ black bord] is good b a bord] ne>ly an in* wide is 9 bad ta/e4 ,aft] ?ree mon?s h pass$ gray /ation]y is p]missible4 ,s9ce !re are no =mal invitations issu$ dur+ ! p]iod ( m\rn+ !re are no special =ms = !m4 ,!re are1 h[ev]1 9 addition to ! regul> m\rn+ /ation]y c>ds ackn[l$g+ expressions ( sympa?y4 ,^! may be _h f any up-to-date /ation]'s4 ,!y may or may n h ! black bord]4 ,! foll[+ is an example ( su* a c>d3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,n4 ,c4 ,graham ?ank y = y\r k9d expression ( sympa?y dur+ _! rec5t b]eavem5t4 ,! visit+ c>d may h an unobtrusive bord] ( black4 ,! bord] on ?is & on ! /ation]y may be less5$ f "t to "t dur+ ! p]iod ( m\rn+ or x may rema9 ! same until x is disc>d$ altoge!r4 ,,*apt] ,,viii ,,*ri/5+s ,,ann\nc+ ,,! ,,bir? ,,( ,,! ,,*ild ,:5 a *ild is born ! "m & fa!r ann\nce ! fact to _! fri5ds by means ( c>ds4 ,^! may be obta9$ 9 ! prevail+ /yle f any good /ation]4 ,sometimes only "o c>d is s5t be>+ ! names ( ! p>5ts & t ( ! *ild or ! ^w1 ,son or ,daught] if ! "n has n be5 decid$ ^u4 ,ano!r fa%ion :i* has become /&>d is ! use ( two c>ds1 "o some:at l>g] ?an ! ord9>y visit+ c>d & atta*$ to x by a t9y :ite ribbon "o v mu* small] be>+ ! "n ( ! infant4 ,!re are also da9ty & attractive c>ds specially design$ = ! occasion4 ,:ile ^! are n s =mal z ! pla9 :ite c>ds !y are1 :5 *os5 ) discrim9ation1 v delightful & almo/ z p]sonal z a note4 ,notes are usually s5t only to "o's mo/ intimate fri5ds4 ,,respond+ ,,to ,,! ,,ann\ncem5t ,fri5ds ( ! p>5ts w1 ( c\rse1 ha/5 to congratulate !m ^u _! good =tune4 ,!y may s5d fl[]s1 magaz9es1 jellies1 etc41 to ! "m & to ! y\ng/] "s little article pleas+ because ( its beauty or its utility4 ,gifts are n necess>y1 h[ev]1 & a w>m & s9c]e note express+ "o's happ9ess at ! good =tune ( ! p>5ts is q suffici5t4 ,! note mu/ n be p]functory4 ,y mu/ rememb] t ! *ild ( y\r fri5d is ! mo/ wond]ful infant t ev] came to e>? to live 7& if y\r private op9ion is to ! contr>y x is be/ to keep x private71 & t conv5tional phrases are entirely inadequate4 ,on ! o!r h& x w n d to gu%4 ,simplicity & s9c]ity are ! be/ means to atta9 ! end desir$4 ,,godp>5ts ,9 ! old _w ! selection ( godp>5ts is a v important duty & ! (fice ( ! godfa!r & ! godmo!r is actual r ?an !oretical2 b 9 ?is c\ntry x has a t5d5cy to become a m]e =m4 ,?is %\ld n be ! case1 = x is a high tribute to a fri5d to ask him to be ! godfa!r ( "o's *ild & x is (t5 an excell5t ?+ = ! *ild4 ,x assures him at lea/ "o fri5d old] ?an himself :o has a v special int]e/ 9 8 welf>e4 ,!re may be f\r sponsors1 or two1 z "o *ooses1 b 9 ,am]ica !re are usually only two1 a godfa!r & a godmo!r4 ,:5ev] possible !y %\ld be ask$ 9 p]son & !y %\ld nev] be ask$ ?r\gh a =mally engrav$ c>d4 ,= ! sponsors are always intimate fri5ds ( ! "m & fa!r or relatives = :om !y feel ! highe/ reg>d4 ,x is ! int]e/ ( ! *ild t is at /ake & ?is %\ld be tak5 into consid]ation by ! p>5ts be=e !y make _! f9al selection4 ,! duties ( ! godp>5ts are n on]\s4 ,!y promise always to befri5d ! *ild & at ! "t ( ! *ri/5+ !y pres5t x ) a gift ( "s sort--jewelry1 g>m5ts1 c>riage or toilette accessories4 ,!y are pres5t at ! baptism1 if possible1 & accompany ! "m & fa!r to ! alt>4 ,! fa!r & godfa!r h little to d beyond l5d+ ! grace ( _! pres5ce to ! occasion4 ,! godmo!r c>ries ! infant to ! alt>1 respl5d5t 9 8 *ri/5+ robe1 & at ! prop] "t h&s x to ! cl]gyman4 ,if !re are no sponsors ! (fice ( ! godmo!r at ! *ur* may be fill$ by ! baby's nurse or by ! "m h]self4 ,,invitations ,,to ,a ,,*ri/5+ ,! *ri/5+ is r>ely an elaborate affair & ! only gue/s are relatives & close fri5ds4 ,if x is n too mu* ( a tax on ! "m x is v lovely = h] to write p]sonal notes to ea* gue/ ask+ him or h] to be pres5t at ! c]emony4 ,if !re is to be a consid]able numb] pres5t engrav$ c>ds may be dispat*$4 ,examples ( bo? ! =mal & ! in=mal invitation are giv5 bel[3 ,june #f1 #ai-- ,my de> ,grace1 ,! baby is to be *ri/5$ next ,sunday at f\r o'clock at ! ,brick ,*ur* & bo? ,h>ry & ,i are anxi\s to h y pres5t4 ,i ?9k ,h>ry ,jr4 w\ld be also if he 7 old en\gh to "k :at x is all ab\t4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,alice ,f4 ,duncan4 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h>ry ,t4 ,duncan reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company at ! *ri/5+ ( _! son on ,sunday aft]noon1 ,june #f at f\r o'clock at ! ,brick ,*ur* ,a ,,*ur* ,,*ri/5+ ,if ! *ri/5+ is to be an occasion ( great =mality & elaboration ! *ur* %\ld be decorat$1 n elaborately z = a w$d+ b simply & prettily ) smilax & f]ns & delicate :ite fl[]s or 9 "s o!r way t w indicate t ! ev5t is = a *ild & n = an old] p]son4 ,! *ild's *ri/5+ robe %\ld be simple b exquisite4 ,he may be br\ght 9 m gracefully if he is c>ri$ on a pill[ or a porte-bb4 ,! "m usually we>s a reception g[n1 hat1 & gloves4 ,! wom5 sponsors are simil>ly dress$ :ile ! mascul9e gue/s we> ! prescrib$ outfit = aft]noon receptions1 ! cutaway coat1 etc41 unless ! *ri/5+ takes place 9 ! summ] :5 light flannels may be sub/itut$4 ,,! ,,h\se ,,*ri/5+ ,!re is v little diff]5ce betwe5 a *ri/5+ t takes place at home & "o at *ur*4 ,! h\se %\ld be decorat$ & a font may be plac$ 9 ! draw+-room4 ,! "m's g[n is less =mal ?an ! "o %e w\ld we> to ! *ur* b ! o!r details are practically ! same4 ,,aft] ,,! ,,baptism ,aft] ! c]emony is ov] & ! y\ng/] has be5 duly admir$ & s5t back to ! nurs]y1 !re may be a reception or tea or ev5 a d9n] or breakfa/1 accord+ to ! "t ( ! *ri/5+1 = ! gue/s4 ,if ! baptism took place at *ur* ! gue/s may drive imm$iately f !re to ! home1 all[+ ! automobile conta9+ ! "m & fa!r to prec$e !m by a few m9utes4 ,if x took place at home matt]s are simplifi$1 = ! gue/s may pass into ano!r room or ! font may be plac$ to "o side4 ,if !re is a breakfa/ or lun*eon s]v$ ! cl]gyman :o p]=m$ ! c]emony is invit$ to be pres5t1 & :e!r or n x is cu/om>y to ask a bless+ he is reque/$ to pron\nce "o4 ,he ent]s ! d9+-room ) ! *ild's gr&mo!r1 or if bo? gr&mo!rs are pres5t1 ) ! eld]4 ,,gifts ,ea* p]son :o is invit$ to ! *ri/5+ is expect$ to rememb] ! infant ) a gift ( "s sort4 ,9 view ( ! fact t !re is usually no?+ t he ne$s & t he is too "y to appreciate any?+1 _m p give = ! future r ?an = ! pres5t4 ,sometimes a fri5d ( ! "m w give ! infant daught] a silv] spoon1 add+ duplicates ea* ye> aft] on its bir?day or at ,*ri/mas until !y =m a complete set4 ,books :i* he w appreciate lat] may be giv54 ,money 9 ! =m ( gold pieces or *ecks is mo/ appropriate & is "o ( ! mo/ popul> ( gifts4 ,c>riage & toilette accessories1 jewelry1 etc41 are1 ( c\rse1 suitable b "o %\ld make sure t !re is an actual ne$ = !m4 ,mo/ p n[adays live 9 a limit$ am\nt ( space ) nei!r a g>ret nor a cell> to /ore ?+s 94 ,,"p ,,ii ,polit5ess itself is always ! same4 ,! rules ( etiquette :i* are m]ely ! =ms 9 :i* x f9ds expression1 v>y ) "t & place4 ,a s9c]e reg>d = ! rights ( o!rs1 9 ! smalle/ matt]s z well z ! l>ge/2 g5u9e k9dness ( he>t2 good ta/e & self comm&1 :i* are ! f\ndations ( good mann]s1 are nev] out ( fa%ion4 --,samuel ,r4 ,wells4 ,,*apt] ,i ,,introductions ,,purpose ,,( ,,! ,,introduction ,! days ( gallant cavali]s & c\rte\s knights :o b[$ pr(usely & d(f$ _! fea!r$ hats to ! v gr\nd :5 introduc$ to ladies ( ! c\rt are ov]4 ,to-day1 simplicity is ! keynote 9 introductions--z 9 ev]y?+ else4 ,b ! significance ( ^? *>m+ introductions ( yore rema9s4 ,we f9d t ! introduction ( to-day is /ill made & ackn[l$g$ ) a c]ta9 measur$ grace & c\rtesy ( mann]4 ,:at x lacks 9 old-"t picturesque gallantry x ga9s 9 a new fri5dl9ess t is 9 accord ) :ole-he>t$ w>m? = :i* ! ,am]icans are fam\s4 ,e day1 9 ! social & bus9ess worlds alike1 !re is ! con/ant ne$ ( introduc+ p correctly4 ,b ! correct introduction does n consi/ m]ely ( mak+ two /rang]s kn[n to ea* o!r--p]haps j tempor>ily4 ,to create an imm$iate fri5dl9ess betwe5 two p :o h met = ! fir/ "t1 to d away ) all hesitancy & emb>rassm5t1 to create smoo? & pleasant conv]sation1 to make ! /rang]s want to cont9ue _! acqua9tance--t is ! purpose ( ! correct introduction4 ,& its a*ievem5t re/s entirely ) ! man or woman :o is ! m$ium ( introduction4 ,a great _m p h ! mi/ak5 impression t an introduction is meant solely to make two p kn[n to ea* o!r = ! %ort "t t !y are 9 company toge!r4 ,! correct introduction helps to create fri5d%ip--! k9d ( fri5d%ip t la/s4 ,x is n en\gh to ex*ange names4 ,x is n en\gh to pres5t "o p]son to ano!r1 & !n =get ab\t x completely4 ,! adroit introduc] draws ! /rang]s into conv]sation at once1 & leads casually into *annels t he1 or %e1 kn[s are ( int]e/ to bo?4 ,to introduce p correctly is an art 9 itself1 & l any o!r art1 x requires con/ant /udy & practice be=e "o becomes adept4 ,,creat+ ,,conv]sation ,we h m5tion$ conv]sation z be+ an ideal means ( e/abli%+ imm$iate und]/&+ betwe5 two /rang]s--or betwe5 a /rang] & a gr\p ( gue/s4 ,let u consid] fir/ ! be/ means to employ 9 creat+ conv]sation betwe5 two p]sons :o h j be5 introduc$4 ,elaborate mann] %\ld be avoid$4 ,simple words & phraseology are always mo/ effective1 especially :5 "o's mann] & tone are s9c]e4 ,brevity is also a virtue to be develop$ 9 introduc+ p4 ,if a sci5ti/ & a /ud5t meet 9 y\r home = ! fir/ "t1 ! /ud5t is pres5t$ to ! old] man4 ,! ho/ or ho/ess might introduce !m 9 ?is mann]3 ,mr4 ,rog]s1 let me pres5t ,mr4 ,br[n1 :o is mak+ a /udy ( social sci5ce at ,p5nsylvania ,univ]sity4 ,naturally1 an introduction ( ?is k9d w\ld lead directly into a discussion on sci5ce--& bo? m5 w\ld feel entirely at ease 9 ea* o!r's company4 ,9 introduc+ a g5tleman to a lady1 ! same rule ( mutual int]e/ = creat+ conv]sation holds true4 ,! ho/ess might say1 ,miss ,murray1 all[ me to pres5t ,mr4 ,smi?1 :o /opp$ at ! ,palms la/ summ] j be=e y arriv$4 ,( c\rse1 ! "y p w\ld imm$iately h some?+ to talk ab\t1 & !re w\ld be no /ra9$ feel+ ( ! sort t usually foll[s 9 ! wake ( a poor introduction4 ,or1 if ,mr4 ,smi? is an au?or1 & ,miss ,murray is v fond ( read+1 ! ho/ess w\ld say1 ,miss ,murray1 ,i'm sure y w be pleas$ to meet ,mr4 ,smi?1 :o writes su* *>m+ fiction4 ,y rememb] h[ mu* we enjoy$ ',! ,rose ,g>d54' ,a great deal dep5ds ^u ! /rang]s !mselves1 :e!r or n conv]sation w move =w>d1 b ! ho/ess :o has introduc$ !m skilfully has c]ta9ly giv5 !m a pleasant op5+4 ,,:5 ,,to ,,introduce ,to introduce or n to introduce8 has (t5 puzzl$ m5 & wom5 ( bett] society4 ,x requires inf9ite tact1 & also a c]ta9 ke5 k ( ! _w1 to det]m9e j :om "o %\ld & "o %\ld n introduce to "o's fri5ds4 ,?is does n ref] to home or private ent]ta9m5ts :]e ev]yone is an invit$ gue/4 ,9 ?is case1 ! ho/ & ho/ess make :atev] introductions !y deem necess>y1 be+ sure t a /rang] is c>efully pres5t$ to ea* gue/4 ,:5 ! reception is a l>ge "o--a ball1 = in/ance--! ro( may s]ve z an introduction2 t is1 ! gue/s may take x = grant$ t ev]yone pres5t1 be+ an invit$ gue/1 has already ! endorsem5t ( ! ho/ess4 ,?us !y may address & conv]se ) anyone !y *oose1 )\t trespass+ any laws ( good conduct4 ,if a lady passes two g5tlem51 "o ( :om %e kn[s1 bo? raise _! hats & greet h]1 b no introductions are made4 ,if he /ops = a mom5t--& x mu/ be only = a v brief mom5t--he does n pres5t 8 companion4 ,/reet introductions are bad =m unless ! little gr\p jo9s =ces & walks on toge!r4 ,9 ! bus9ess _w1 introductions are made :5ev] a mutual acqua9tance or fri5d is pres5t4 ,bus9ess introductions are gov]n$ v l>gely by diplomacy1 al?\gh ! g5tleman w make sure t 8 bus9ess introduction is j z c\rte\s & graceful z 8 social introduction4 ,grant+ t all y\r fri5ds & acqua9tances are ( ! v be/ society1 x is q safe to say t y may introduce two p to ea* o!r1 or a gr\p ( p to "o ano!r1 :5ev] y *ance to be a mutual fri5d4 ,:e!r or n ! acqua9tance%ip cont9ues dep5ds entirely ^u ! p :o h be5 introduc$4 ,x is c]ta9ly bett] =m to introduce two p1 ev5 ?\gh y are 9 d\bt z to _! simil>ity ( "* & p]sonality1 ?an to h "o ( y\r fri5ds--or sev]al ( !m--feel slight$4 ,!re are few ?+s m unk9d & disc\rte\s ?an to neglect introduc+ /rang]s to ea* o!r4 ,,importance ,,( ,,c>e ,an awkw>d or haphaz>d introduction c n be effective4 ,a common fault seems to be to mumble hurri$ly ov] names--a v bad fault1 inde$1 z x leaves ! /rang]s 9 ignorance z to ea* o!r's id5tity4 ,names %\ld be pron\nc$ c>efully & di/9ctly1 leav+ no d\bt :atev] 9 ! m9ds ( ^? :o are be+ pres5t$ to ea* o!r4 ,to slur ov] names 9 ha/e or emb>rassm5t1 is to create a /ra9$ & uncom=table atmosph]e4 ,z 9 ev]y?+ else 9 good society1 o/5tation is extremely vulg>4 ,deep b[s1 fl\ri%es1 & =c$ phrases h no place 9 ! "r sort ( pres5tations4 ,brief1 simple introductions1 ) a note ( s9c]e cordiality1 are c]ta9ly m impressive ?an mu* elaborate wav+ ( h&s & b[+4 ,,special ,,introductions ,x is1 ( c\rse1 an e/abli%$ rule t a man %\ld always be pres5t$ to a lady4 ,b ! rule does n hold true :5 a lady is pres5t$ to "s g5tleman ( exceptionally high & di/+ui%$ position4 ,?us1 if a lady is pres5t$ to ! ,presid5t ( ! ,unit$ ,/ates1 or to an ex-,presid5t1 or pr9ce1 duke1 or ar*duke1 ! g5tleman's "n is m5tion$ fir/4 ,ano!r exception to ! rule is :5 unm>ri$ ladies are pres5t$ to important memb]s ( ! cl]gy1 su* z ! bi%op or ar*bi%op2 "h also ! g5tleman's "n is m5tion$ fir/4 ,!re is only "o great exception to ! rule t all unm>ri$ wom5 are pres5t$ to matrons3 all wom51 no matt] :e!r !y are "y unm>ri$ wom5 or eld]ly matrons1 are introduc$ to ! wife ( ! ,presid5t ( ! ,unit$ ,/ates4 ,!re are sev]al exceptions to ! rule t all "y & unm>ri$ m5 be pres5t$ to old] m54 ,fir/1 !re is ! ,presid5t ( ! ,unit$ ,/ates1 to :om all m51 "y & old1 are pres5t$4 ,simil>ly1 a ho/ 9 8 own home is always m5tion$ fir/4 ,a memb] ( a royal & reign+ family is nev] pres5t$ to anyone unless x is someone ( high] royalty2 all introductions are made to him4 ,a gue/ ( honor at an ent]ta9m5t is also giv5 ! di/9ction ( hav+ all gue/s pres5t$ to him4 ,,:5 ,,! ,,"n ,,isn',t ,,he>d ,x v (t5 happ5s1 9 mak+ introductions1 t "o does n q und]/& ! "n murmur$ by ! "o :o is mak+ ! introduction4 ,!re is absolutely no reason to become flu/]$ & emb>rass$4 ,simply smile or nod 9 ackn[l$gm5t1 & say1 ,i beg y\r p>don1 ,i did n cat* y\r "n4 ,or "o might say1 ,i am sorry1 b ,i did n cat* ! "n4 ,pr(use apologies are n good =m2 9 fact1 !y are entirely out ( place1 = ! fault lies completely ) ! man or woman :o has made ! introduction4 ,address y\rself to ! /rang]1 :5 y wi% ! "n to be repeat$1 & make y\r reque/ simply1 directly & ) calm dignity4 ,d n %[ ei!r by ha/e or emb>rassm5t t y are ill at ease because ! "n escap$ y4 ,_m times x is ! fault ( ! p :o are be+ introduc$ t !y d n und]/& ! names4 ,!y d n li/5 = !m4 ,x is "o ( ! secrets ( social success1 if !re c be any?+ secret ab\t a ?+ s obvi\s1 to be able to rememb] names correctly4 ,p 9 bus9ess realize ?is & salesm5 devote special "t to tra9+ !mselves to rememb] ! names ( _! cu/om]s4 ,a v bad fault is to attempt to guess at a "n :5 x is n he>d di/9ctly4 ,x is p]fectly correct to ask3 ,did ,mrs4 ,rob]ts call y ,miss ,gray8 ,b nev] address ! "y lady z ,miss ,gray if y h ! lea/ d\bt z to :e!r or n t 0 ! "n giv54 ,h] "n may be ,graham1 or ,gray]son6 ,x is mu* wis] to ask & be correct1 ?an to guess & be correct$4 ,,! ,,correct ,,introduction ,let u n[ consid] ! correct =ms = ! g5]al introduction4 ,= all ord9>y occasions ! simple =m1 ,mrs4 ,johns1 let me pres5t ,mr4 ,br[n1 is ! be/4 ,because x is brief1 direct & simple x may be us$ effectively on almo/ any occasion4 ,9 introduc+ m5 to wom51 ! woman's "n is inv>iably spok5 fir/1 & ! g5tleman is pres5t$ to h]4 ,sev]al phrases t are q g5]ally us$ 9 social circles are3 ,mrs4 ,a1 all[ me to introduce ,mr4 ,b1 or ,mrs4 ,a1 ,mr4 ,b wi%es to be pres5t$ to y1 or ,mrs4 ,a1 may ,i pres5t ,mr4 ,b8 ,su* phrases z ,let me make y acqua9t$ ) & ,i want y to %ake h&s ) are awkw>d & altoge!r too casual4 ,!y %\ld nev] be us$4 ,:5 !re is a great diff]5ce 9 ! ages ( two wom51 ! y\ng] is pres5t$ to ! eld]4 ,?us1 if ,mrs4 ,br[n is an eld]ly matron1 & ,mrs4 ,smi? is a rec5t bride1 "o w\ld say3 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 let me pres5t ,mrs4 ,smi?4 ,an unm>ri$ woman is always pres5t$ to a matron 9 ?is mann]3 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 may ,i pres5t ,miss ,jones8 or ,mrs4 ,br[n1 ?is is ,miss ,jones4 ,:5 x is h>d to decide :i* ( two m>ri$ wom5 is old]1 "o may give due ref]5ce to bo? by introduc+ 9 ?is mo/ satisfactory mann]3 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 let me pres5t ,mrs4 ,smi?2 ,mrs4 ,smi?1 ,mrs4 ,br[n4 ,simil> di/9ctions are made 9 ! introduc+ ( two g5tlem54 ,:]e !re is no diff]5ce 9 age1 title or dignity1 ! introduction may be m]ely3 ,mr4 ,:ite1 ,mr4 ,jones4 ,a "y man is pres5t$ to an old] man1 a ba*elor to a m>ri$ man4 ,h[ev]1 if ! ba*elor is a v5]able old g5tleman1 a m>ri$ man is pres5t$ to him1 9 def]5ce to 8 age4 ,citiz5s )\t (ficial di/9ction are inv>iably pres5t$ to s5ators1 judges1 gov]nors1 etc4 ,:5 introduc+ a fri5d to "o's p>5ts x is correct to say1 ,"m1 may ,i pres5t ,miss ,smi?8 or ,"m1 ?is is ,mr4 ,jones4 ,! fri5d is always introduc$ to ! "m fir/1 !n to ! fa!r4 ,o!r relatives are introduc$ 9 ! ord] ( _! age & position 9 ! family4 ,9 pres5t+ a relative ^: "n is ! same z y\r own x is unnecess>y to repeat ! "n4 ,= in/ance1 ,miss ,daniels1 d y "k my si/]1 ,mildr$8 or ,miss ,daniels1 may ,i pres5t my bro!r1 ,h>ry8 ,if ! "n is diff]5t p>ticul> pa9s %\ld be tak5 to pron\nce x4 ,miss ,daniels1 ?is is my si/]1 ,mrs4 ,graham4 ,or1 ,miss ,daniels1 may ,i pres5t my bro!r1 ,mr4 ,frankl98 ,,gr\p ,,introductions ,x is consid]$ bad =m to int]rupt a conv]sation to introduce a newcom]4 ,always wait until ! conv]sation has subsid$ be=e y v5ture to pres5t a /rang] to a gr\p ( p4 ,! be/ way to introduce a g5tleman to a gr\p ( gue/s is to m5tion ! names only1 9 ?is mann]3 ,mr4 ,jones--,miss ,smi?1 ,miss ,rob]ts1 ,mr4 ,frank & ,mr4 ,br[n4 ,or "o might say1 ,mr4 ,jones1 let me introduce y to---- & !n give ! names ( ! gue/s 9 ! gr\p1 be+ sure to m5tion ! ladies fir/4 ,a lady is introduc$ to a gr\p ( p 9 ! same mann]4 ,x is indicative ( bad ta/e to conduct a "y lady ar\nd a l>ge room & introduce h] individually to ea* /rang]4 ,g5tlem5 %\ld always be tak5 to h] to be pres5t$ to h]4 ,x is only :5 ! "y lady is a dbutante or a y\?ful memb] ( society t %e is conduct$ across a room to be pres5t$ to "s eld]ly d[ag] or to ! gue/ ( honor4 ,x is inconsid]ate to pres5t any "o p]son to a great numb] ( o!rs all at once4 ,x is n only emb>rass+ b ! task ( rememb]+ anyone ( ! p introduc$ is hopeless4 ,,! ,,*ance ,,introduction ,be=e we g any fur!r 9 ! correct =ms = introductions1 we w (f] a ^w ( caution t %\ld be c>efully he$$4 ,nev] introduce p to ea* o!r unless y are q c]ta9 t x w be agreeable to bo?4 ,= in/ance1 if two "y wom5 ( y\r acqua9tance h be5 att5d+ ! same *ur* = sev]al ye>s & yet d n greet or recognize ea* o!r1 x may be assum$ t !y h a reason = rema9+ /rang]s4 ,9 su* a case1 an introduction c\ld only be pa9ful to bo?4 ,an introduction is n m]ely a trivial conv5tion--a duty t mu/ be att5d$ to4 ,x is an important c]emony1 ! v corn]-/one ( fri5d%ip4 ,to be =mally introduc$ is to h a c]ta9 dem& on "o's future good graces & fri5dl9ess4 ,?us1 x is bad ta/e to introduce ra%ly & indiscrim9ately4 ,assum+ t y h no reason to believe t !y d n wi% to "k ea* o!r1 ?is is ! be/ =m to employ 9 introduc+ two "y wom51 bo? ( :om y meet at ! same "t3 ,miss ,jones1 ,miss ,smi?4 ,?is =m %\ld inv>iably be us$ 9 mak+ public introductions1 at *ur*1 ! !at]1 ! op]a1 etc4 ,if ! "n ( "o ( ! "y wom5 has be5 =gott51 "o may say1 ,i'm afraid ,i h =gott5 y\r "n1 or ,=give me1 b ,i _c recall y\r "n j n[4 ,z soon z ! requir$ in=mation is giv51 ! introduction may proce$ z above4 ,,incomplete ,,introductions ,"s c>eless ho/esses neglect to complete introductions4 ,?is causes emb>rassm5t = bo?1 or all1 p conc]n$1 & reflects discr$itably on ! ho/ess4 ,:o has n he>d ! o!rwise *>m+ ho/ess greet a fri5d cordially 9 ?is mann]3 ,oh1 h[-d-y-d1 my de>6 ,let me introduce ,mrs4 ,all51 ,mrs4 ,bak] & ,mr4 ,c>t]4 ,! "y p]son :o has j arriv$ c h>dly avoid feel+ a bit confus$1 & p]haps a bit slight$4 ,& ! p to :om ?is introduction 0 made w c]ta9ly feel emb>rass$ :5 !y meet ! /rang] aga9 & mu/ ask 8 or h] "n4 ,ano!r type ( incomplete introduction is to draw two /rang]s into conv]sation by say+ casually3 ,mrs4 ,rob]ts1 ,mrs4 ,jones 0 at ! op]a la/ night & he>d ! same piani/ y he>d two weeks ago4 ,?is is h>dly suffici5t4 ,! rem>k %\ld h be5 ei!r prec$$ or foll[$ by a bona fide introduction1 ?\gh ! smile & b[ ( ! ho/ess z %e speaks may be s cordial z to remove :atev] feel+ ( con/ra9t !re might h be54 ,! incomplete introduction is c>eless & unk9d4 ,! ho/ess is unfair to h] gue/s if %e does n make ea* introduction def9ite & =mal1 if %e does n pron\nce cle>ly ! names ( bo? p to be pres5t$ to ea* o!r4 ,,indirect ,,introductions ,! indirect introduction is entirely diff]5t f ! incomplete introduction4 ,! =m] is (t5 necess>y & purposely resort$ to2 ! latt] is inv>iably a mi/ake or ! result ( c>elessness4 ,:5 x is desirable to draw ano!r into conv]sation1 !n ! ho/ess may make an indirect introduction to avoid /iffness & con/ra9t4 ,?us1 :ile conv]s+ ) "o gue/1 %e may turn to ano!r & say3 ,mrs4 ,blank1 ,mrs4 ,smi? 0 j tell+ u ab\t ! fam\s picture t 0 br\ght rec5tly to ,am]ica4 ,h y se5 x8 ,! purpose ( ! ho/ess w be a*iev$1 = ! gue/ address$ w jo9 ! conv]sation1 al?\gh !re has be5 no =mal introduction4 ,:5 two p are br\ght toge!r 9 ?is mann]1 ! "q ( :e!r or n !y cont9ue _! acqua9tance%ip dep5ds entirely ^u !mselves4 ,9 tak+ leave ( ea* o!r1 wom5 :o h be5 only semi-introduc$ may nod or %ake h&s z !y please4 ,x is n necess>y to seek out a woman to :om "o has be5 indirectly introduc$ 9 ord] to take leave ( h]4 ,if ! semi-introduction is betwe5 a man & woman1 ! woman mu/ ei!r nod fir/1 or (f] h] h& fir/1 9 leave-tak+4 ,x is ! sign ( h] will+ness to be =mally introduc$4 ,,! ,,ackn[l$gm5t ,a c\rte\s ackn[l$gm5t is ess5tial to e introduction4 ,x is n en\gh to *ant a /ilt$ phrase ea* "t ! ho/ess pres5ts y to a /rang]4 ,p>rot-l repetition w make y appe> dull & ord9>y4 ,b to make graci\s1 cordial ackn[l$gm5ts is to ga9 ! imm$iate sympa?y & fri5dl9ess ( ^? to :om y h be5 introduc$4 ,! /iff =mal b[ is quickly los+ all its pre/ige 9 ! be/ social circles4 ,9 its place is ! w>m1 cordial h&clasp1 or ! fri5dly smile & incl9ation ( ! head4 ,! b[ is only acceptable :5 a /rang] is pres5t$ to a gr\p ( gue/s4 ,& ev5 !n x %\ld consi/ m]ely ( a nod & g5ial smile t includes ! entire company4 ,a ho/ess rises to receive all introductions1 & (f]s h] h& bo? to m5 & wom54 ,b a woman gue/ reta9s h] place :5 introduc$ to a g5tleman1 or :5 %e is "o ( a gr\p to :om a woman gue/ is pres5t$4 ,h[ev]1 if ! /rang] is introduc$ to h] individually1 %e rises 9 ackn[l$gm5t4 ,o!r occasions t require ! woman ( culture to rise are :5 %e is be+ introduc$ to ! ho/ess1 to an eld]ly or di/+ui%$ g5tleman1 to a gue/ ( honor1 or to an eld]ly woman4 ,a g5tleman inv>iably /&s :5 introduc$4 ,if ! introduction takes place out ( doors1 he is expect$ to lift 8 hat & b[ slightly4 ,:5 introduc$ to a lady1 he mu/ wait until %e takes ! initiative 9 (f]+ him h] h&4 ,if %e does n (f] h] h& 9 ackn[l$gm5t ( ! introduction1 he may m]ely nod1 lift 8 hat1 & (f] a ^w or two ( graci\s pleasure at hav+ be5 introduc$ to h]4 ,,=ms ,,( ,,ackn[l$gm5t ,! ho/ess ext5ds h] h& & says cordially1 ,i am delight$ to "k y ,mrs4 ,br[n1 or1 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 ,i am mo/ pleas$ to meet y4 ,h[ d y d1 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 is us$ a great deal4 ,on be+ pres5t$ to a lady1 a g5tleman might say1 ,delight$ to "k y1 ,miss ,jones1 or ,miss ,jones1 ,i am v glad inde$ to meet y4 ,! correct =m to use :5 "o man is introduc$ to ano!r is usually1 ,h[ d y d8 al?\gh a great _m m5 l to use ! expression1 ,i'm v glad to meet y4 ,a "y woman introduc$ to a matron might say1 ,?is is a pleasure inde$1 ,mrs4 ,rog]s4 ,a g5tleman might ackn[l$ge an introduction to a lady by say+1 ,i am pleas$ to "k y1 ,mrs4 ,jones1 or simply1 ,h[ d y d1 ,mrs4 ,jones8 ,x is n s mu* a "q ( :at is said z ( h[ x is said4 ,x happ5s1 sometimes1 t a ho/ess unkn[+ly w introduce to ea* o!r two m51 or two wom51 :o h long be5 on unfri5dly t]ms4 ,to ignore ea* o!r completely "u su* circum/ances w\ld be a brea* ( good conduct1 & an emb>rassm5t to ev]yone conc]n$4 ,x is c]ta9ly wis]1 if n m agreeable1 to nod z ?\gh "o 7 a /rang]1 & lat] tactfully avoid ! man or woman ^: company y d n wi% to %>e4 ,! ackn[l$gm5t to an introduction is important4 ,x is ! fir/ impression ! /rang] ga9s ( y1 & x is y\r duty to make x a good--& la/+ "o4 ,x is always be/ to repeat ! "n--9 fact1 ! repeat+ ( ! "n is all t is necess>y--s9ce x gives an opportunity = correction if ! p]son to :om ! introduction 0 made misund]/ood x4 ,= example1 :5 ! ho/ess says1 ,mrs4 ,davis1 let me pres5t ,mrs4 ,raymond1 ! ladies may b[ politely1 ea* murmur+ ! "n ( ! o!r4 ,,future ,,recognition ,,( ,,introduction ,) introductions made z hurri$ly & haphaz>dly z !y are to-day1 at l>ge receptions & balls1 x is (t5 puzzl+ to det]m9e :e!r or n "o %\ld greet a c]ta9 new acqua9tance at ! next meet+4 ,!re are c]ta9 def9ite rules t may be foll[$ ) confid5ce4 ,x is important to rememb] t ! fir/ intimation ( recognition aft] an introduction mu/ always come f ! lady4 ,a g5tleman does n (f] 8 h&1 nor does he b[ or nod to ! lady he has met only once be=e until %e has made ! fir/ movem5t4 ,! privilege ( cont9u+ or end+ ! acqua9tance%ip re/s ) h]4 ,z a g5]al rule1 "o b[s to all ^? :om "o has met at d9n]1 lun*eon or breakfa/4 ,x is also usual to greet ^? ) :om "o may h drunk tea at a reception1 & ) :om "o may h play$ a game ( t5nis or golf4 ,incomplete introductions require no future recognition1 unless ! p introduc$ desire to cultivate a fri5d%ip4 ,if two p are pres5t$ to ea* o!r = ! second "t1 polite ackn[l$gm5t mu/ be made4 ,x is n necess>y1 ?\gh (t5 x is pleasant1 to recall a =m] introduction1 especially if "o feels sure t ! o!r w h no difficulty 9 recollect+ ! occasion4 ,x is ! duty ( ! g5tleman to recall a previ\s introduction4 ,he may say1 ,i ?9k ,i h _h ! pleasure ( meet+ ,miss ,/one la/ week1 or1 ,miss ,/one & ,i h already be5 introduc$4 ,if two ladies are pres5t$ to ea* o!r = ! second "t1 ! y\ng] or unm>ri$ "o incurs ! duty ( recall+ ! fir/ introduction4 ,i h already met ,mrs4 ,jessup1 is a =m t may be us$ on any occasion4 ,,introduc+ ,,at ,,d9n] ,at a =mal or in=mal d9n]1 ! ho/ & ho/ess mu/ make all gue/s kn[n to "o ano!r be=e lead+ ! company to ! table4 ,x is nei!r graceful nor good =m to introduce aft] ! gue/s are seat$4 ,! secret ( correct introduction at d9n] is to avoid all obvi\s ef=ts to pres5t c]ta9 gue/s to "o ano!r4 ,= in/ance1 x is n ! be/ =m to int]rupt a conv]sation & draw a "y man to ano!r "p ( ! room to pres5t him to a "y lady4 ,nor is x necess>y = ! ho/ess to incommode h]self by ris+1 dur+ ! c\rse ( ! d9n]1 to greet a late-com] & make him kn[n to ! o!r gue/s4 ,%e may m]ely nod to him1 accept 8 excuse = t>d9ess ) a graci\s smile or ^w ( welcome1 & reta9 all introductions until lat] 9 ! ev5+ :5 ! gue/s h assembl$ 9 ! draw+-room4 ,sometimes1 at a v l>ge =mal d9n]1 x is n possible = ! ho/ & ho/ess to introduce e gue/4 ,9 ?is case x is necess>y to introduce only ! g5tlem5 & ladies :o are to g 9 toge!r to table4 ,lat]1 :5 ! ladies ga!r 9 ! draw+-room1 ! clev] ho/ess w contrive to make all h] gue/s kn[n to ea* o!r2 & :5 ! g5tlem5 jo9 !m aft] _! cig>s1 bo? ho/ & ho/ess may adroitly conclude ! introductions4 ,h[ev]1 x is also good =m = ! ho/ to make 8 complete introductions :ile ! g5tlem5 are hav+ _! aft]-d9n] smoke & *at1 & = ! ho/ess to make h] introductions 9 ! draw+-room among ! ladies4 ,! g5tlem5 may !n be pres5t$ to ! ladies dur+ ! c\rse ( ! ev5+4 ,if !re is a di/+ui%$ gue/1 or a gue/ ( honor1 = :om ! d9n] is giv51 all gue/s mu/ be pres5t$ to him at "s "t dur+ ! ev5+4 ,if ! introductions _c be completely a*iev$ be=e d9n]1 ! ho/ & ho/ess may cont9ue !m :5 ! gue/s reassemble 9 ! draw+-room4 ,,introduc+ ,,at ,,! ,,dance ,:5 a ball or dance is giv5 9 honor ( a dbutante daught]1 or 9 honor ( a visit+ gue/1 ! ho/ess1 on receiv+ h] gue/s1 pres5ts !m to ! honor$ p]son :o /&s at h] side4 ,dur+ ! c\rse ( ! dance itself1 ! ho/ & ho/ess1 z well z ! memb]s ( _! family1 make all ! introductions !y c )\t inconv5i5c+ ei!r _! gue/s or !mselves4 ,at a private dance ! ho/ & ho/ess mu/ con/antly contrive to pres5t g5tlem5 to ladies1 s t !re w always be new p>tn]s = ea* dance4 ,if x is a v small dance1 ! /rictly =mal introduction is r>ely p]=m$2 ! girls introduce _! p>tn]s to _! p>ticul> fri5ds1 & ! "y m5 pres5t _! fri5ds to _! p>tn]s )\t ask+ p]mission to d s4 ,at a v l>ge1 =mal ball or dance1 x is good =m to ask p]mission ( a lady be=e pres5t+ a g5tleman to h]4 ,x is c]ta9ly ! safe/ & mo/ satisfactory way1 & reflects good ta/e & c\rtesy bo? on ! "p ( ! g5tleman :o wi%es to be introduc$ & ! g5tleman :o is ! m$ium ( introduction4 ,! g5tleman :o escorts a lady to a dance has a v di/9ct duty ) reg>d to introductions4 ,he mu/ pres5t to h]1 at v>i\s int]vals dur+ ! dance1 z _m ( 8 mascul9e fri5ds z he feels %e w\ld welcome z p>tn]s4 ,at a public ball1 he inv>iably asks h] p]mission to make ^! introductions1 z he does also at a v l>ge =mal ball4 ,b if ! "y lady is a fri5d ( long /&+1 & 8 own comrades p]sonal fri5ds = :om he c v\*1 x is n necess>y to reque/ =mally ! lady's p]mission be=e mak+ ! introductions4 ,at public balls1 ! reception committee pres5ts ea* gue/ to ! gue/ ( honor4 ,if !re is no gue/ ( honor1 ! committee m]ely welcomes ! gue/s1 & leaves ! duty ( introduction to *ap]ons & escorts4 ,patronesses & reception committees are n obligat$ 9 any way to make introductions at subscriptions or public balls1 ?\gh x (t5 helps to make ! affair m pleasant :5 !y take "p 9 pres5tations4 ,,introduc+ ,,at ,,receptions ,! ho/ess ( an aft]noon or ev5+ reception pres5ts ea* gue/ :o arrives to ! gue/ ( honor or dbutante daught]1 :o /&s at h] side & receives ) h]4 ,%e may n leave h] po/ at ! door to make introductions1 b %e may pres5t z _m gue/s to "o ano!r z is possible )\t leav+ h] place4 ,! wise ho/ess always has sev]al fem99e memb]s ( h] family to assi/ h] 9 mak+ gue/s kn[n to "o ano!r4 ,^! "y wom5 may introduce any /rang]s 9 ! company4 ,! ladies 9 *>ge ( ! refre%m5ts 9 ! d9+ room may also speak )\t introduction to gue/s ( ei!r sex1 9 ord] to (f] tea1 *ocolate or bonbons4 ,!y are privileg$ to make introductions :5ev] x is 9 _! p[] to d s4 ,a committee is usually appo9t$ to receive ! gue/s at a public reception4 ,! committee1 or "p ( x1 /&s by ! door to receive ea* gue/ =mally1 & introductions are made m]ely by hav+ a liv]i$ s]vant ann\nce ! "n 9 a l\d1 cle> voice4 ,! gue/ b[s to ! committee1 & consid]s himself introduc$4 ,!n ! committee may be address$ by ! /rang] :o desires fur!r introductions to o!r gue/s4 ,x is important1 at ^! public receptions t ! committee 9 *>ge p]=m z ne>ly z possible ! duty ( ho/ & ho/ess4 ,,speak+ ,,)\t ,,introduction ,"s p :o pride !mselves ^u be+ well-br$ make !mselves appe> actually ludicr\s by be+ highly indignant :5 address$ by someone to :om !y h n be5 introduc$4 ,surely 9 ?is _w ( good-fell[%ip & op5-he>t$ fri5dl9ess x is ridicul\s to seal "o's m\? & be alo(1 m]ely because "o has n be5 =mally pres5t$6 ,!re is1 = in/ance1 ! g5tleman "o sits next to on ! /eam] deck4 ,a lady1 ( c\rse1 may n on any condition address a g5tleman :om %e does n "k1 nor may a g5tleman address a lady :o is a /rang] to him4 ,b :5 two m5 are sitt+ side-by-side on a /eam] deck1 bo? glory+ 9 ! solemn dignity ( ! sea1 & ! wide expanse ( sky1 x w\ld be petty inde$ to refra9 f conv]sation4 ,if a fri5d%ip is to be develop$ lat]1 a =mal introduction may be s\ght2 b = ! pres5t1 ?\gh !y h nev] be5 pres5t$ to ea* o!r1 ! m5 may enjoy a conv]sation )\t feel+ t !y are trespass+ beyond ! b\nd>ies ( etiquette4 ,simil>ly1 ! lady travel+ across c\ntry may comm5t ^u ! spl5did op5 /ret*es ( c\ntry1 ! hazy impressiv5ess ( ! m\nta9s 9 ! di/ance & ! surpris+ beauty ( ! tra9's smoke aga9/ ! azure sky1 to ! lady sitt+ opposite h]1 ev5 ?\gh !y h nev] be5 introduc$4 ,& !y may c>ry on q a delightful conv]sation )\t be+ =mally pres5t$ to ea* o!r4 ,!re c be no?+ q z %all[ z refus+ to answ]1 or answ]+ coldly1 ! p]son :o addresses y 9 a _s ( fri5dl9ess1 m]ely because !re h be5 no =mal introductions4 ,"o mu/ h vision en\gh to see t :at is correct 9 ! ballroom w\ld be /ra9$ & n>r[ 9 ! %ad[ ( ! huge m\nta9s :]e m5 & wom5 ( e social /&+ ga!r to enjoy ! same glori\s bigness ( ?+s4 ,,introduc+ ,,*ildr5 ,x is important = *ildr5 to be taught e>ly ! significance & value ( =mal introductions4 ,b p>5ts mu/ c>efully avoid all sugge/ion ( snobbi%ness 9 _! "y sons & daught]s4 ,!re is an amus+ /ory relat$ ( a c]ta9 little ,engli% lad :o 0 visit+ 9 ,am]ica ) 8 fa!r1 :o happ5$ to be a memb] ( ! ,h\se ( ,lords4 ,! y\ng/] _h a well develop$ case ( snobbi%ness4 ,at an aft]noon reception giv5 9 honor ( 8 fa!r1 ! boy 0 introduc$ to sev]al "y ,am]icans1 invit$ especially = 8 b5efit4 ,dur+ ! c\rse ( ! aft]noon1 ! ho/ess notic$ t he 0 sitt+ (f to "o side1 avoid+ ! o!r "y gue/s4 ,:5 %e spoke to him ab\t x1 & ask$ him :y he didn't jo9 ! o!r "y p1 he rem>k$ /iffly3 ,9 ,engl&1 ! son ( a memb] ( ! ,h\se ( ,lords does n associate ) common]s6 ,:ile ! fa!r crimson$1 ! little ,am]ican gue/s laugh$ 9 amusem5t4 ,& a newspap] correspond5t :o 0 pres5t enjoy$ ! humor ( ! situation s ke5ly t he devot$ a :ole column to x4 ,a well-br$ *ild introduces 8 or h] small fri5d to old] p]sons by say+1 ,mrs4 ,?ompson1 ?is is my si/] ,ray1 or1 ,"m1 may ,i pres5t my s*oolmate1 ,bob1 to y8 ,*ildr5 %\ld be taught n to use /ilt$1 unnatural phrases4 ,_! introductions %\ld be easy & natural4 ,a *ild introduc+ 8 "y c\s9 to a fri5d w\ld say1 ,bob1 ?is is my c\s91 ,ralph4 ,:5 introduc$ to an adult1 ! prop]ly tra9$ *ild waits = ! eld] to speak fir/4 ,if "s expression ( pleasure at ! meet+ is made1 ! *ild may say1 ,?ank y1 ,mrs4 ,&]son4 ,a p>5t w\ld introduce h] daught] 9 ?is mann]3 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 ?is is my little daught] ,anne1 or1 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 my boy ,john wi%es to be pres5t$ to y4 ,*ildr5 %\ld be introduc$ to ea* o!r 9 a casual way = /ra9$ introductions cause !m to feel ill at ease 9 "o ano!r's company4 ,h>ry1 ?is is ,john ,br[n4 ,i am sure y w enjoy he>+ all ab\t 8 new pony1 or1 ,m>y1 ,bob wants to tell y ab\t some?+ funny t happ5$ at s*ool ! o!r day4 ,! simple expression1 ,h[ d y d1 is always be/ = *ildr5 :o are ackn[l$g+ introductions4 ,,cordiality ,,9 ,,introductions ,) ! pass+ ( ! ridicul\s half-f+] h&%ake1 ) ! arm ext5d$ upw>d & ! wri/ b5t awkw>dly1 introductions h become m cordial & s9c]e4 ,:i* is entirely z x %\ld be4 ,too _m p g ?r\gh ! c]emony ( an introduction m]ely z a matt] ( duty1 )\t realiz+ its port5t 9 ! matt] ( fri5d%ip & future acqua9tance4 ,we h all met ! man or woman :o nods /iffly 9 ackn[l$gm5t ( an introduction1 & (f]s "s /]eotyp$ expression ( welcome4 ,& we h all met ! man or woman :o smiles w>mly1 (f]s a s9c]e h&clasp1 & ackn[l$ges ! introduction s cordially t "o feels entirely at ease4 ,9 ! latt] case1 a brief acqua9tance usually rip5s into fri5d%ip1 :ile 9 ! =m] in/ance1 "o is incl9$ to =get promptly ! "o to :om ! introduction has be5 made4 ,! next "t y are introduc$ to a /rang]1 smile s9c]ely1 make y\r h&clasp w>m & firm1 put cordiality into y\r welcome & see h[ y\r new acqua9tance responds6 ,! correct introduction alone is n ! corn]-/one ( fri5d%ip2 b ! correct introduction t is also cordial op5s ! door to fri5d%ips t p]haps are seal$ to e o!r ef=t4 ,:e!r y are mak+ an introduction or ackn[l$g+ "o1 be sure t x is bo? correct & cordial4 ,,*apt] ,,ii ,,lett]s ,,( ,,introduction ,,! ,,lett] ,,( ,,introduction ,lett]s ( introduction %\ld be drawn only on relatives1 or on v close fri5ds4 ,x is n consid]$ entirely e?ical to introduce by a lett] an individual ( :om ! writ] kn[s v little1 or t[>d :om ! writ] is n especially fri5dly4 ,x is also sc>cely good =m to ask = a lett] ( introduction2 ! truly cultur$ p]son w dep5d ^u ! k9d impulses ( a fri5d or relative to recognize ! ne$ = su* pres5tation4 ,c>e %\ld be ex]t$ 9 ! issu+ ( ^! lett]s4 ,"s p1 because !y h n suffici5t willp[] to refuse a direct reque/1 w issue su* a lett] to a p]son :om !y h>dly "k1 & = ^: "* !y _c v\*4 ,?us !y are =c$ to s5d a private lett] to ! p]son to :om ! lett] ( introduction is address$1 expla9+ t ! /rang] is really n v well kn[n to !m1 & t p]haps ! ho/ess _h bett] f9d out m ab\t him1 or h]4 ,?is always causes an emb>rass+ & uncom=table situation2 x is always bett] to refuse frankly1 unless "o kn[s ! man or woman & is will+ to endorse him he>tily & s9c]ely4 ,a lett] ( introduction %\ld be brief1 concise & free f matt]s ( p]sonal or private int]e/4 ,if ! be>] ( ! lett] is 9 m\rn+1 or has suff]$ "s rec5t grief or loss1 or if he is ! victim ( unhappy circum/ances or peculi> prejudices1 a private lett] %\ld be s5t to ! p]son to :om ! lett] is address$1 expla9+ ! situation4 ,?is does n hold true :5 ! /rang] has "s special mission to p]=m2 9 ?is case1 ! explanation is writt5 directly 9 ! orig9al lett] ( introduction4 ,a note ( introduction r>ely cov]s m ?an a page or a page & a half ( m$ium-size note pap]1 & x %\ld be conf9$ /rictly to ! pres5tation ( ! p]son 9 ^: behalf x is writt54 ,no?+ irrelevant1 su* z inquiry reg>d+ ! heal? ( c]ta9 p ( mutual acqua9tance1 or ( dome/ic int]e/1 %\ld be includ$4 ,! lett] is plac$ 9 an unseal$ envelope4 ,,pres5t+ ,,! ,,lett] ,usually lett]s ( introduction are n pres5t$ 9 p]son1 b s5t ) ! c>d ( ! man or woman to be introduc$4 ,?is relieves ! c]emony ( t awkw>dness :i* usually foll[s :5 someone pres5ts a lett] ( introduction & waits :ile x is be+ read4 ,if "o does n wi% to s5d x ?r\gh ! mails1 ! lett] may be left ) "o's c>d at ! door ( ! "o to :om x is address$4 ,:5 ! lett] ( introduction is f a g5tleman to a lady1 or r :5 ! lett] introduces a g5tleman to a lady1 he inv>iably calls 9 ! aft]noon & s5ds up ! lett] ) 8 c>d4 ,if ! lady is n at home1 he may slip ! c>d into ! same envelope z ! lett]1 & leave x ) ! s]vant to be deliv]$4 ,a g5tleman also calls to pres5t a lett] ( introduction to a memb] ( 8 own sex4 ,a woman :o wi%es to pres5t a lett] ( introduction to ano!r woman1 calls p]sonally & leaves ! lett] ) h] own c>d1 or slips h] c>d into ! envelope1 seals x1 & s5ds x ?r\gh ! mails4 ,ei!r me?od ( pres5tation is correct4 ,h[ev]1 :5 ! lett] is address$ to a g5tleman1 %e does n call1 unless x is "s v special & unusual occasion1 b tru/s ! lett] to ! mails = safe deliv]y4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,a ,,lett] ,,( ,,introduction ,a lett] ( introduction requires imm$iate recognition 9 "s =m4 ,ei!r a call or an invitation %\ld be made )9 ?ree or f\r days4 ,if x is impossible to honor a lett] ( introduction by ! usual =m ( visit+ or ent]ta9+ !n x is absolutely ess5tial t a prompt & adequate explanation %\ld be writt5 to ! au?or & be>] ( ! lett]4 ,ord9>ily1 :5 ! be>] ( a lett] ( introduction is a woman1 a call is made )9 ?ree days4 ,?is call is foll[$ by ! (f] ( "s hospitality1 usually a lun*eon or tea4 ,a g5tleman calls ^u a lady or ^u ano!r g5tleman z soon z he receives a lett] ( introduction4 ,b a lady1 in/ead ( mak+ a call1 s5ds an invitation to ! g5tleman :o is introduc$ to h] by means ( a lett]4 ,any delay 9 ackn[l$g+ a lett] ( introduction is uncivil1 bo? to ! p]son :o wrote ! lett] & ! "o be+ introduc$4 ,if "o is invalid$1 a %ort note %\ld be writt5 expla9+ :y a call _c be made1 & arrang+ = a meet+ z e>ly z circum/ances p]mit4 ,b to wait a week or two be=e ackn[l$g+ a lett] ( introduction1 & !n writ+ to expla91 is to %[ lack ( good bre$+ & ignorance ( ! laws ( good conduct4 ,x is a m>k ( c\rtesy to write to ! p]son :o br\ght ab\t ! acqua9tance ) a new fri5d by means ( a lett] ( introduction1 ?ank+ him or h] = ! note t inspir$ ! fri5d%ip4 ,,model ,,lett]s ,,( ,,introduction ,a lett] ( introduction %\ld be simple & to ! po9t4 ,x %\ld also be fri5dly1 cordial & explanatory4 ,x is plac$ 9 a s+le envelope1 unseal$1 ) ! full "n & address ( ! p]son to :om ! be>] is introduc$4 ,"h are "s lett]s t are (f]$ m]ely z sugge/ions4 ,( c\rse !y may be *ang$ & add$ to1 to meet c]ta9 conditions3 ,new ,hav51 ,conn41 ,m>* #d1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,br[n3 ,?is w introduce to y ,miss ,rose ,johnson ( ,camd51 ,new ,j]sey1 :o int5ds /ay+ 9 y\r *>m+ city dur+ ,decemb] & ,janu>y4 ,i h kn[n ,miss ,johnson = ?ree ye>s1 & feel sure t y w f9d pleasure 9 h] company4 ,) w>me/ p]sonal reg>ds1 ,i am ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,m>g>et ,f4 ,d[e4 ,new ,york1 ,n4,y41 ,april #d1 #ai-- ,de> ,trav]s3 ,! be>] ( ?is note1 ,mr4 ,rob]t ,duncan1 ( ,*icago1 plans to be 9 y\r t[n = two mon?s4 ,besides be+ a p]sonal fri5d ( m9e1 he is ! adv]tis+ manag] ( ! ,goodfield ,company 9 ,los ,angeles1 & kn[+ z ,i d h[ int]e/$ y are 9 adv]tis+1 ,i feel t y w\ld l to "k him4 ,y w f9d him good company ev]y:]e1 ,i ?9k1 = he n only talks ent]ta9+ly b he plays t5nis & golf & bridge & plays !m well4 ,i hope t y w be able to help him enjoy 8 /ay 9 ,madison4 ,) k9de/ reg>ds to ,mrs4 ,trav]s1 ,i am ,cordially y\rs1 ,bob ,we/ely4 ,baltimore1 ,md41 ,oct4 #ai1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,r[ell3 ,x gives me great pleasure to pres5t to y ,mr4 ,raymond ,gordon1 ! be>] ( ?is note1 ) :om ,i h be5 associat$ 9 bus9ess & socially = _m ye>s4 ,bus9ess takes him to ,baltimore1 :]e he is an entire /rang]4 ,i w p]sonally appreciate any k9dness y may %[ him dur+ 8 /ay !re4 ,y\rs mo/ s9c]ely1 ,rob]t ,s4 ,balf\r4 ,,! ,,c>d ,,( ,,introduction ,v (t5 a c>d ( introduction1 in/ead ( a lett]1 is issu$4 ,! lett] is pref]r$ 9 ! case ( special fri5ds1 z x conveys a c]ta9 c\rtesy t ! /rictly =mal c>d lacks4 ,yet ! c>d is no less p[]ful an ag5t 9 solicit+ & secur+ civilities = a man or woman 9 a /range t[n4 ,its place is 9 ! bus9ess r ?an ! social _w1 :]e (t5 x is ! means ( secur+ an int]view :i* x w\ld be almo/ impossible to get )\t "s k9d ( endorsem5t4 ,! c>d ( introduction consi/s m]ely ( a visit+ c>d ) ! "n ( ! p]son to be introduc$ writt5 above t ( ! s5d]4 ,a c>d s prep>$ %\ld be plac$ 9 a c>d envelope1 left unseal$1 & address$ to ! p]son to :om ! introduction is to be made4 ,! words :i* appe> at ! top ( ! c>d are writt5 also at ! extreme bottom ( ! envelope1 ei!r bel[ ! address or 9 ! left-h& corn]4 ,"h is a typical visit+ c>d1 inscrib$ correctly ) ! "n & address ( ! m$ium ( introduction1 & be>+ ! correct introduction above ! "n3 ,introduc+ ,miss ,rose ,m4 ,rob]ts ,mr4 ,*>les ,hanson ,morton #bh ,we/ #ah? ,/4 ,,bus9ess ,,introductions ,! man :o values 8 good "n among 8 bus9ess associates w n give lett]s ( introduction indiscrim9ately4 ,!re are no special rules gov]n+ su* lett]s 9 ! bus9ess _w beyond ^? ( ! social _w4 ,x is v annoy+ to a busy man to h to int]rupt 8 "w to make himself agreeable to all sorts & conditions ( m5 :o may come be>+ missives :i* give !m entrance4 ,p %\ld rememb] ?is 9 giv+ lett]s ( introduction & %\ld absolutely refuse unless !y feel sure t some?+ ( mutual b5efit may arise f ! meet+4 ,to give a lett] ( introduction = ! same reason t "o sometimes buys goods ( a p]si/5t ag5t--to get rid ( him--is a v poor way out ( ! difficulty4 ,x is p]missible to ask = a lett] ( introduction to a bus9ess man if ! p]son f :om x is reque/$ is a good fri5d & ! p]son :o asks = x has an excell5t reason = do+ s4 ,( c\rse x is mu* bett] :5 ! lett] comes z a free-w (f]+1 = !re is no possibility ( hav+ to meet ) a refusal4 ,a refusal to grant a lett] %\ld n ang] ! p]son :o ask$ = x1 & ! p]son :o feels compell$ to d5y ! reque/ %\ld give a c\rte\s reason--!re is usually su* a reason--= do+ s4 ,,*apt] ,,iii ,,calls ,,& ,,call+ ,,cu/oms ,,! ,,beg9n+ ,,( ,,social ,,calls ,! orig9 ( ! social call dates f ! ,/one ,age1 :5 ! head ( a family us$ to leave a r\ghly c>v$ block ( /one at ! door ( ano!r1 z an expression ( good-w & fri5d%ip4 ,! mo/ m>k$ developm5t 9 calls & visit+ is trac$ among ! ,ori5tals1 & especially ! ,*9ese4 ,9 ,*9a1 ev5 to-day1 ! social call is practically a sacr$ c]emony1 & x is only ! v l[e/ coolie :o does n pay regul> calls ^u 8 fri5ds & neighbors4 ,x is contr>y to ! ,am]ican ideal to develop or enc\rage highly complicat$ social c]emonies1 & ev5 ! mo/ =mal call 9 ?is c\ntry to-day is simply a meet+ ( good fri5ds4 ,) ! ru% ( mod]n life & ! multitud9\s opportunities :i* x (f]s = div]sion & in/ruction !re is a t5d5cy to neglect "o's social calls4 ,x is a great pity1 = no?+ is q s preci\s z "o's fri5ds1 & 0 x n ,em]son :o said1 ,g (t5 to ! h\se ( ?y fri5d = we$s *oke ! unus$ pa?8 ,,:5 ,,calls ,,are ,,made ,9 ! city1 =mal calls are made betwe5 f\r & six o'clock 9 ! aft]noon4 ,morn+ calls are consid]$ in=mal 9 ! city2 !y are made only to transact bus9ess1 or by special appo9tm5t4 ,only a v intimate fri5d is privileg$ to call 9 ! morn+ m]ely = social purposes4 ,illu/ration3 ,br[n ,bros4 ,,an ,,alt> ,,= ,a ,,home ,,w$d+ ,a simil> plan ( decoration may be us$ effectively 9 a mu* less pret5ti\s home4 ,wom5 r>ely call 9 ! ev5+1 unless x is a fri5dly in=mal visit4 ,m5 may make =mal ev5+ visits bo? 9 ! city & c\ntry4 ,9 ! city !y may call z e>ly z eight o'clock or z late z half-pa/ n9e4 ,x is n 9 good ta/e to call v late 9 ! ev5+1 especially 9 ! c\ntry :]e ! retir+ h\r is e>ly4 ,x is p]fectly correct = a woman :o is at bus9ess dur+ ! day to pay h] calls dur+ ! e>ly "p ( ! ev5+4 ,morn+ calls 9 ! c\ntry may be made betwe5 half-pa/ t5 & "o o'clock4 ,bo? m5 & wom5 %\ld obs]ve ^! h\rs4 ,x is only 9 ! c5t]s ( =mal & fa%ionable society1 :]e lun*eon is usually s]v$ at "o o'clock t morn+ calls are res]v$ = occasions ( bus9ess4 ,:5 a call is paid = ! purpose ( condol5ce1 or ( inquir+ aft] a sick fri5d1 no special h\r ne$ be obs]v$1 z ! call] r>ely advances beyond ! ?re%old ( ! front door4 ,be=e call+ on a fri5d 9 a hospital "o %\ld asc]ta9 ! h\rs dur+ :i* visitors are all[$4 ,,! ,,prop] ,,l5g? ,,( ,a ,,call ,nev] prolong a call until x becomes a relief to dep>t--bo? = y & y\r ho/ess4 ,?is is n irrelevant1 nor is x too sev]e4 ,!re are _m p :o d n "k :5 to dep>t1 & simply because !y are afraid ( leav+ too e>ly & (f5d+ ! ho/ess1 !y prolong ! visit unduly & dep5d ^u gossip & =c$ conv]sation to pass ! "t4 ,x is n good ta/e to make a call t la/s t5 m9utes2 b x is c]ta9ly no bett] to make "o t la/s ?ree h\rs4 ,:5 a fir/ & =mal call is paid1 fifte5 or tw5ty m9utes is ! usual "t = ex*ang+ civilities1 & = mak+ a graceful exit4 ,! ord9>y =mal call may be ext5d$ f a qu>t] to ?ree-qu>t]s ( an h\r4 ,a fri5dly call may be cont9u$ an h\r1 & sometimes an h\r & a half4 ,calls ( inquiry1 condol5ce & in=mation %\ld nev] be prolong$ long] ?an is requir$ to obta9 ! in=mation requir$4 ,calls ( condol5ce %\ld be made especially %ort1 z x is a m>k ( inconsid]ation to =ce oneself on a ho/ess :o is suff]+ a rec5t b]eavem5t4 ,,! ,,day ,,at ,,home ,calls %\ld always be paid on ! ho/ess' day at home1 if possible4 ,x is always m complim5t>y & consid]ate to obs]ve a day at home ?an to call on an aft]noon :5 ! ho/ess does n expect y4 ,9 l>ge cities & fa%ionable circles1 x is cu/om>y = e ho/ess to issue at-home c>ds1 giv+ ! day & h\r1 or j ! day1 :5 %e w be at home to visitors4 ,^! are issu$ to all h] fri5ds & acqua9tances & !y are expect$ to make _! social calls1 calls ( congratulation1 calls ( appreciation--all calls except ^? t h to d ) bus9ess--on t aft]noon4 ,sunday calls are n[ consid]$ in=mal4 ,9 small t[ns & c\ntry neighborhoods !y may be made aft] *ur* or 9 ! ev5+1 b 9 l>ge cities =mal visits are r>ely made on ,sunday4 ,"h aga9 m5 7& bus9ess wom57 enjoy a special privilege2 !y may make _! =mal calls any aft]noon or ev5+ ( ! week1 ,sunday n except$4 ,p]haps ?is is only fair1 z ! ,am]ican man1 & _m ( ! ,am]ican wom51 h _! morn+s & aft]noons completely absorb$ by ! exactions ( _! bus9ess4 ,,dress ,,= ,,calls ,9 mak+ bus9ess calls a woman %\ld we> /reet dress ( ! mo/ simple & cons]vative type4 ,= h] social calls also %e %\ld we> /reet attire1 b x ne$ n be s sev]e z = bus9ess purposes4 ,especially if %e is to g by public conveyance %e %\ld be c>eful n to make h]self conspicu\s by h] dress4 ,! ho/ess is always m or less in=mally dress$ unless h] at home takes on ! proportions ( a reception1 9 :i* case %e we>s an elaborate reception g[n4 ,m5 seldom pay calls1 & :5 !y d1 = ! mo/ "p1 !y we> ord9>y bus9ess suits unless ! occasion is "o ( importance4 ,=mal ev5+ calls require =mal ev5+ dress4 ,,pay+ ,,! ,,fir/ ,,call ,9 ! c\ntry1 all newcom]s wait until !y are call$ ^u be=e call+ or leav+ c>ds4 ,=m]ly1 calls 7 paid only ^u ^? newcom]s :o 7 9 "o's imm$iate neighborhood1 b n[ motor+ has greatly increas$ ! area ( visit+4 ,?us1 :5 a newcom] builds or r5ts a home )9 easy motor+ di/ance1 "o mu/ feel obligat$ to call & leave c>ds4 ,brides also wait to receive fir/ calls4 ,neighbors & fri5ds are expect$ to call & leave c>ds imm$iately ^u ! return f ! honeymoon4 ,x is ! p>ticul> duty ( all w$d+ gue/s to call promptly z soon z ! bride ann\nces h] return4 ,:5 a lady comes to visit a fri5d 9 ano!r t[n1 x is ! duty ( all fri5ds ( ! ho/ess to make ! fir/ call4 ,x is also ! rule = wom5 :o h be5 ent]ta9$ 9 a fri5d's h\se 9 ! c\ntry to be ! fir/ to call on t fri5d imm$iately ^u h] return to t[n4 ,:]e !re is no indebt$ness ( ?is k9d & :5 two wom5 arrive home f _! respective summ] vacations at ab\t ! same "t1 x is cu/om>y = ! y\ng] to make ! fir/ call ^u ! old]4 ,! matt] ( pay+ ! fir/ call is (t5 a v delicate "o4 ,frequ5tly s5sitive p are (f5d$ by "s unconsci\s slight on ! "p ( a fri5d4 ,! foll[+ rules w help ^? :o are 9 d\bt1 & :o are anxi\s to foll[ ! correct usage1 & ?us avoid blund]s t may result 9 brok5 fri5d%ips4 ,an unm>ri$ woman always pays ! fir/ call ( ! season ^u a matron4 ,! eld] ( two wom5 is entitl$ to ! fir/ visit4 ,?is same rule holds true among m51 :5 ! "q ( ! =mal call arises4 ,9 l>ge cities1 :5 ! recogniz$ w9t] p]iod = ex*ang+ =mal calls op5s1 v little att5tion is paid to ! matt] ( ! fir/ calls ( ! season4 ,x is usually dep5d5t ^u conv5i5ce & incl9ation ( individuals1 & ^u ! settl+ ( an at-home day4 ,sometimes wom5 :o are exceptionally punctili\s make _! fir/ calls ) ref]5ce to c\rtesies ext5d$ or receiv$ 9 ! =ego+ season4 ,?us1 !y ref] to _! call+ li/s ( ! prec$+ w9t]1 9 decid+ on :om to make ! fir/ calls4 ,h[ev]1 ?is is entirely 9 ! h&s ( ! individual4 ,,calls ,,( ,,obligation ,!re are c]ta9 obligatory calls t mu/ be made1 if "o wi%es to be 9 accord ) ! laws ( etiquette4 ,^! are sometimes ref]r$ to z duty calls4 ,= in/ance1 x is ess5tial = all w$d+ gue/s1 bridesmaids1 u%]s1 & = ! be/ man1 maid ( honor & matron ( honor to call on ! bride's "m )9 ?ree weeks aft] h] daught]'s w$d+4 ,!y mu/ also call ^u ! bride z soon z %e returns f h] honeymoon4 ,if ! w$d+ 0 held at ! home ( a si/] or o!r relative1 ! call is made to ! lady :o act$ 9 ! capacity ( ho/ess4 ,! gue/s at a home w$d+1 w$d+ reception or breakfa/1 are also obligat$ to call on ! bride's "m1 & on ! bride h]self1 9 due c\rse4 ,x is di/9ctly important = all gue/s1 bo? m5 & wom51 at a =mal d9n] to call ^u ! ho/ess )9 two or1 at ! mo/1 ?ree weeks aft] ! d9n]4 ,?is holds true ev5 if ! invitation 0 n accept$4 ,! d9n] call %\ld be paid promptly2 if a man or woman :o has n accept$ an invitation to d9n] does n call )9 ?ree weeks1 ! ho/ess has e reason to believe t he1 or %e1 does n desire h] fri5d%ip & hospitality4 ,?is same holds true ( balls1 supp]s1 p>ties & receptions4 ,n to accept an invitation1 & n to call1 is a gross incivility & reflects ^u ! good mann]s ( ! p]son :o has neglect$ to make ! obligatory call4 ,duty calls are necess>y aft] =mal lun*eons or breakfa/s1 & aft] musicales1 !at] p>ties1 op]a p>ties1 g>d5 p>ties1 & aft] att5d+ a *ri/5+4 ,su* a call %\ld be made )9 ! two weeks foll[+ ! ev5t4 ,o!r obligatory calls are made bo? be=e & aft] a fun]al4 ,! fir/ call is m]ely a matt] ( c>d-leav+1 unless "o is an intimate fri5d ( ! b]eav$ family4 ,aft] ! fun]al a call ( condol5ce %\ld be made4 ,a ho/ess :o foll[s ! laws ( good society to ! lett]1 inv>iably calls on a new acqua9tance be=e (f]+ h] any hospitality1 or be=e issu+ any invitations to h]4 ,o!r calls t are a matt] ( obligation are ^? ( inquiry reg>d+ a fri5d's heal?1 ( congratulation to p>5ts on ! bir? ( a *ild1 & ( congratulation to ! "y lady :o has ann\nc$ h] engagem5t4 ,all ^! calls are social necessities1 & ! man or woman :o is well-br$ nev] neglects !m4 ,,ab\t ,,return+ ,,calls ,x is ( ! utmo/ importance t calls be promptly return$4 ,b p]haps ! mo/ exact+ ( all is ! fir/ call4 ,to neglect to return x )9 two weeks1 or ?ree at ! mo/1 or to expla9 by lett] :y x _c be return$1 is to indicate tacitly t ! call]'s fri5d%ip is n desir$4 ,?is1 ( c\rse1 is an extremely rude & inconsid]ate me?od to *oose1 if "o really does n desire to cultivate a c]ta9 fri5d%ip1 = !re are _m graci\s & less unk9d means to employ4 ,a bride1 or a visitor 9 a neighborhood1 or a newcom] to a t[n1 %\ld n let m ?an t5 days1 or at ! mo/ two weeks1 elapse be=e return+ ! civilities ( _! new neighbors4 ,! fir/ call ( a new acqua9tance %\ld be j z promptly return$4 ,aft] ! fir/ call is return$1 x dep5ds ^u ! individuals conc]n$ :e!r a fri5d%ip %all be develop$1 or :e!r a call+ acqua9tance %all be kept up4 7,! expression call+ acqua9tance is us$ to indicate ! cu/om ( ladies call+ ^u ea* o!r once or twice dur+ ! ye> z a social duty1 r ?an z a means ( develop+ fri5d%ip47 ,:5 calls are ex*ang$ only once 9 twelve mon?s x is an indication t only a purely =mal acqua9tance exi/s betwe5 two p4 ,b :5 two wom5 are fri5ds1 !y may ex*ange calls at int]vals ( ?ree weeks or a mon?1 & sometimes v de> fri5ds ex*ange calls e week4 ,h[ev]1 9 ?is latt] case ! calls are m or less in=mal4 ,calls ( condol5ce1 sympa?y1 inquiry & congratulation are usually answ]$ by s5d+ c>ds or brief notes to ! call]s4 ,lat]1 on issu+ f m\rn+1 or on recov]y ( heal?1 ! calls ( condol5ce & inquiry may be return$1 b x is n entirely necess>y1 & dep5ds l>gely ^u ! conv5i5ce & individual desire ( ! p]son on :om ! call 0 made4 ,:5 a ho/ess is ask$ to invite ! fri5ds ( h] fri5ds to a reception at h] home1 %e is n obligat$ to return _! calls ( duty4 ,nor does a woman return any ( ! calls1 =mal or in=mal1 ( h] g5tlem5 acqua9tances4 ,:5 "o woman receives a call f ano!r woman :o be>s a lett] ( introduction1 a return call mu/ be made promptly1 or a lett] ( explanation writt5 )9 two weeks aft] ! day ( ! fir/ call4 ,! same rule is obs]v$ betwe5 m54 ,,! ,,call ,,( ,,condol5ce ,x %\ld be rememb]$ t no ha/y intrusions %\ld ev] be made ^u grief4 ,x %[s lack ( good ta/e & extreme inconsid]ation4 ,only intimate fri5ds ( a b]eav$ family1 or ( "o memb] ( t family1 call = any l5g? ( "t4 ,o!rs m]ely leave _! c>ds ) cordial inquiries reg>d+ ! heal? & spirits ( ! memb]s ( ! family4 ,!y may =w>d a box ( fl[]s1 includ+ _! p]sonal c>d 9 ! box1 in/ead ( call+ to leave a c>d 9 p]son4 ,b :5 ! =mal call ( condol5ce is made1 t5 days or two weeks aft] ! fun]al1 ! intimate fri5ds ( ! family %\ld be c>eful to avoid all subjects t w\ld cause pa9 to ! b]eav$ ones4 ,!y %\ld n1 unless gift$ ) r>e tact1 make any ref]5ce to ! dea? b %\ld r speak ( *e]ful ?+s4 ,h[ev]1 x may be necess>y to give "s ^w ( sympa?y ei!r ^u greet+ or dep>ture4 ,a tactful way to greet a sorr[+ p]son is to say simply1 ,i h call$ to assure y ( my sympa?y4 ,! subject %\ld !n be dropp$ & o!r matt]s discuss$4 ,on dep>ture a ^w ( *e] & sympa?y1 & a he>ty w>m h&-clasp g a long way t[>ds help+ matt]s4 ,calls ( condol5ce %\ld be brief4 ,x is poor =m to rema9 long] ?an fifte5 m9utes1 unless "o is a p>ticul>ly intimate fri5d & able to relieve ! int5sity ( grief by 8 or h] pres5ce4 ,if ! p]son call$ ^u feels ! loss s poignantly t he or %e _c be compos$1 x is f> bett] to leave a cordial note at ! door ask+ to be excus$ f all call]s1 ?an to greet !m & cause emb>rassm5t by a display ( emotion4 ,p]sons 9 affliction (t5 pref] to be alone1 & ! intrusion ( anyone except _! v de>e/ fri5ds causes fre% grief4 ,,! ,,call ,,( ,,congratulation ,,& ,,inquiry ,calls ( congratulation are w>rant$ only by intimacy or by fri5d%ip ( long /&+4 ,aft] ! bir? ( a *ild1 fem99e fri5ds ( ! "m incur ! duty ( call+ ^u h] & leav+ inquiries ab\t h] own & h] *ild's heal?1 along ) ! cu/om>y congratulations4 ,fri5ds ( ! "y lady :o ann\nces h] engagem5t are expect$ to call & (f] congratulations4 ,?is call is usually made betwe5 t5 days & two weeks aft] ! ann\ncem5t is receiv$4 ,m>ri$ wom5 :o are fri5ds ( ! "y woman's "m also call to make _! congratulations4 ,calls ( inquiry are made dur+ ! illness or convalesc5ce ( a fri5d or acqua9tance4 ,sometimes ^! calls are made aft] a fire or accid5t1 or aft] "s sev]al f9ancial loss or o!r disa/]4 ,extreme tact is ne$$ 9 pay+ su* calls4 ,! call itself assumes no great] proportions ?an t m]ely ( door/ep c>d-leav+1 yet x is an expression ( g5u9e sympa?y & a desire to %[ t fri5d%ip w be cont9u$ no matt] :at happ5s4 ,! *apt] devot$ to visit+ c>ds conta9s sev]al model c>ds ( inquiry t c be us$ on ! v>i\s occasions m5tion$4 ,,! ,,social ,,calls ,,( ,,m5 ,g5tlem5 ( good society usually devote ,sunday aft]noons & ev5+s to _! =mal visits4 ,weekday ev5+s are also (t5 giv5 ov] to ! same purpose4 ,! g5tleman :o calls ^u a lady %[s good ta/e & consid]ation by select+ h] day at home4 ,a man is expect$ to make calls ( condol5ce1 inquiry & congratulation ^u all 8 intimate fri5ds1 m5 & wom54 ,he is also expect$ to pay a call promptly ^u a ho/ess :o has ent]ta9$ him ei!r at d9n] or a dance4 ,h[ev]1 he may n call aga9 unless he is invit$ to d s by ! ho/ess4 ,a ba*elor resid+ 9 a new neighborhood is expect$ to return all fir/ calls made ^u him1 b he has ! privilege ( reque/+ a si/] or woman relative liv+ ) him to make ! return call 9 8 "n4 ,:5 introduc$ to a g5tleman by means ( a lett] ( introduction f a mutual fri5d1 x is ess5tial t ! recipi5t return ! call )9 ?ree days4 ,?is holds true also if x is a lady :o pres5ts ! lett] ( introduction4 ,g5tlem5 :o are invit$ to balls1 d9n]s1 !at] p>ties1 g>d5 p>ties1 etc41 are expect$ to make calls )9 t5 days or two weeks1 ev5 ?\gh !y d n accept ! invitation4 ,,! ,,invalid',s ,,call ,an invalid may return calls by s5d+ a daught] or a close fri5d 9 h] /ead4 ,a si/] may also make calls = an invalid$ woman4 ,:5 a memb] ( society is an invalid1 ) no daught]s or si/]s1 & ) no v intimate fri5ds1 %e may issue c>ds or notes ?r\gh ! mails if %e wi%es to keep up h] social activities4 ,a daught] ( an invalid calls ^u all h] "m's fri5ds1 introduces h]self1 & expla9s :y %e is appe>+ 9 h] "m's place4 ,or %e may j leave h] "m's c>d1 ) h] own "n & a ^w ( explanation writt5 above x4 ,! latt] me?od is und\bt$ly ! mo/ satisfactory4 ,a p]son :o is invalid$ tempor>ily may s5d c>ds 9 answ] to ! c\rtesies ( fri5ds or %e may all[ h] daught] to assume h] social responsibilities4 ,usually because ( ! heavy dem&s :i* society places ^u "o %e goes back to h] r\nd ( calls1 teas1 receptions1 etc41 gradually r ?an all at once4 ,fri5ds are always consid]ate "u su* circum/ances & etiquette nev] exacts m ?an "o c possibly d4 ,,ask+ ,a ,,new ,,acqua9tance ,,to ,,call ,y _c1 except "u special conditions1 invite p to y\r home unless y h call$ on !m 9 =mal mann] & !y h return$ ! visit4 ,a "y woman1 & an unm>ri$ woman1 wait = an invitation to call f an old] woman & matron4 ,x is n advisable = a "y woman to ask a g5tleman to call until %e has met him sev]al times & is q sure t %e wi%es to develop 8 fri5d%ip4 ,a woman nev] calls ^u a g5tleman except on a bus9ess mission1 9 :i* case %e may n discuss social or dome/ic topics4 ,a m>ri$ woman does n leave a c>d = an unm>ri$ man unless %e has be5 to a reception at 8 h\se2 !n %e leaves "o ( h] own c>ds ) "o ( h] husb&'s4 ,x is expect$ ( a "y matron or ( a dbutante t %e reque/ be+ p]mitt$ to call ^u an eld]ly matron or old lady aft] ! two h met at a wat]+-place or 9 ! home ( a mutual fri5d1 & aft] hav+ ex*ang$ c>ds4 ,a g5tleman :o wi%es to call ^u a "y girl he admires1 fir/ asks p]mission ( ! lady's "m1 be+ q c]ta91 ( c\rse1 t 8 visit w\ld be agreeable to ! "y lady h]self4 ,to ask p]mission ( ! "m is to convey a v di/9ct complim5t to bo? wom51 & reflects culture & bre$+ ^u ! "* ( ! "y man himself4 ,:5 ask+ a g5tleman to call x is suffici5t to say1 ,"m & ,i w be at home ,w$nesday at ?ree o'clock1 ,mr4 ,blank4 ,i hope y w come to see u1 or1 ,i %\ld be v glad to h y visit me1 ,mr4 ,blank4 ,"m & ,i are usually at home 9 ! ev5+s4 ,9 "s sections ( ! c\ntry x is cu/om>y = ! g5tleman to ask p]mission to call ^u a "y lady1 r ?an = ! "y lady to reque/ him to call4 ,he may say1 ,miss ,blank1 ,i hope ,i may call on y sometime be=e v long1 or ,i w\ld l to call ^u y at y\r home1 ,miss ,blank4 ,may ,i call "s ev5+ :5 y & y\r "m are at home8 ,,! ,,woman',s ,,bus9ess ,,call ,a woman may call on a man only = bus9ess purposes4 ,9 ?is case ! man is usually h] cl]gyman1 editor1 lawy]1 physician or m]*ant1 & ! call is made dur+ (fice h\rs4 ,! woman :o is mak+ a bus9ess call does n usually s5d 9 a visit+ c>d1 b m]ely gives h] "n to ! att5dant4 ,%e /ates h] bus9ess briefly1 rememb]+ to avoid all p]sonal1 social or dome/ic topics n ess5tial to ! fur!rance ( ! matt] 9 h&4 ,if x is necess>y = a woman to call ^u a man at 8 home1 %e mu/ be accompani$ by a male relative1 or by a woman old] ?an h]self4 ,?is holds true only :5 %e is entirely unacqua9t$ ) ! memb]s ( ! man's family1 & is only acqua9t$ ) ! man himself ?r\gh bus9ess int]e/s4 ,%e does n s5d up h] c>ds1 m]ely h] "n1 & %e makes h] visit z %ort z possible4 ,:5 a woman calls at a ba*elor ap>tm5t or at a g5tleman's /udio x is an unimpea*able law ( etiquette t %e be correctly *ap]on$4 ,etiquette also b>s a woman f visit+ a g5tleman's club1 ev5 = ! purpose ( see+ h] husb&4 ,! lady :o has be5 ent]ta9$ at ! home ( a g5tleman may drive to 8 door & s5d up h] c>d4 ,b %e nev] ent]s 8 home = a social visit4 ,,receiv+ ,,calls ,! day at home is devot$ exclusively to ! receiv+ & ent]ta9+ ( call]s4 ,?is day at home is decid$ by ! ho/ess at ! beg9n+ ( ! season2 "o day ea* week1 or "o day 9 e two weeks1 is set ap>t = receiv+ calls4 ,! ho/ess %\ld be ready to receive h] fir/ call by a few m9utes be=e ?ree o'clock4 ,%e may1 if %e wi%es1 specify a c]ta9 h\r = call+ on h] at-home c>d1 b if %e pref]s to leave ! h\r op51 %e %\ld be prep>$ to greet h] gue/s f ?ree o'clock 9 ! aft]noon until a little be=e half-pa/ five4 ,!re are ?ree me?ods t may be employ$ 9 ann\nc+ a call]4 ,! me?od y *oose %\ld be gov]n$ by :at y c af=d & by :at is mo/ conv5i5t = y4 ,! mo/ =mal & effective plan is to h a full-liv]i$ butl] at ! door to lead ea* gue/ to ! draw+-room1 & !n ann\nce 8 or h] "n to ! ho/ess4 ,or a s]vant may be at ! door to (f] ea* visitor a small silv] tray1 on :i* to place 8 or h] c>d4 ,! mo/ simple me?od is to place a l>ge tray 9 ! hall1 pref]ably on a small table t is conspicu\sly situat$1 & into ?is ! c>ds ( ! call]s may be ca/ z !y pass into ! draw+-room4 ,x %\ld be rememb]$ t a maid-s]vant nev] ann\nces call]s1 b only (f]s !m a c>d-tray & helps !m ) _! wraps4 ,! call] at an ap>tm5t h\se %\ld fir/ h ! hall boy telephone up to ! ho/ess--unless ! call] is expect$--to "k if %e is at home4 ,x is n p]missible except among v intimate fri5ds to g up unann\nc$4 ,! ho/ess %\ld always prep>e "s sort ( refre%m5t = h] gue/s on ! day at home4 ,9 w9t]1 tea or hot *ocolate may be s]v$ ) waf]s or cake4 ,sometimes light s&wi*es & bonbons are s]v$ on ! day at home4 ,9 ! w>m summ] mon?s1 if calls are made1 ! visitors may be refre%$ ) ic$ tea1 *ocolate or pun*4 ,,duties ,,( ,,! ,,ho/ess ,on h] day at home1 ! ho/ess makes e ef=t to make h] call]s feel t %e is glad to h !m4 ,%e rises z ea* new gue/ makes 8 or h] appe>ance1 /eps =w>d & (f]s h] h& 9 greet+4 ,! expressions1 ,h[ d y d1 ,mrs4 ,br[n1 & ,i am delight$ to see y1 ,mr4 ,gray1 are effective phrases ( greet+4 ,x is h] important duty to make g5]al introductions1 & to give "s special att5tion to ea* call] z he or %e arrives1 draw+ him into conv]sation ) ! o!rs be=e leav+ him to greet ano!r newcom]4 ,if ! rooms are w>m1 ! ho/ess may invite a fem99e call] to remove h] wraps1 b %e mu/ n assume ?is privilege ) ! g5tleman4 ,%e usually s]ves tea or *ocolate h]self1 b if !re are _m gue/s1 %e may ask "o or two fri5ds to assi/ h]4 ,x is poor hospitality to insi/ ^u repl5i%+ a cup ( tea aft] a gue/ has decl9$ ) ?anks4 ,,receiv+ ,,! ,,*ance ,,call] ,x is n always v conv5i5t to ent]ta9 *ance call]s1 especially if "o has "s important bus9ess or appo9tm5t to att5d to4 ,b :5 ! s]vant at ! door has admitt$ t h] mi/ress is at home1 ! ho/ess %\ld ex]t e ef=t to make good ! s]vant's assurance4 ,%e mu/ n keep ! call] wait+1 nor mu/ %e ask to be excus$ aft] ! call] has be5 admitt$4 ,if important bus9ess claims h] "t1 %e may come to ! draw+-room & aft] welcom+ ! visitor1 expla9 ! situation & ask to be excus$4 ,by no means may %e s5d a writt5 or v]bal excuse by mess5g]4 ,hav+ be5 admitt$1 ! pres5ce ( ! ho/ess is dem&$ if x is = no o!r reason ?an to (f] an excuse4 ,if ! ho/ess has no press+ bus9ess duties or appo9tm5ts to :i* to att5d1 x is h] duty to af=d e hospitality to ! *ance call]4 ,if ! call is made 9 ! aft]noon1 & if ! ho/ess ord9>ily s]ves tea at t h\r1 %e may s]ve tea1 *ocolate or pun* ) cake or waf]s4 ,:5 ! call] is a g5tleman1 & ! ho/ess a "y lady1 x is prop] to call "o's "m or *ap]on into ! draw+-room to make ! correct introduction1 or if ! visitor is already kn[n1 to welcome him4 ,a "y lady :o is well-br$ does n ent]ta9 g5tlem5 until !y h be5 welcom$ by h] "m4 ,:5 two *ance call]s arrive at ! same "t1 ! ho/ess is1 ( c\rse1 "u obligation to make ! necess>y introductions4 ,,:5 ,,! ,,ho/ ,,is ,,at ,,home ,x is n v (t5 t ! ho/ is pres5t at 8 wife's day at home1 = ! v good reason t bus9ess claims all 8 "t dur+ ! day4 ,b !re is no reason :y he %\ld n be pres5t if he desires to & if x is conv5i5t = him4 ,! duty ( any mascul9e memb] ( a family appe>+ 9 ! draw+-room on ! day at home--:e!r x be husb&1 son or bro!r--is to %>e 9 ! honors & obligations ( ! occasion4 ,he w be introduc$ to ^? visitors ) :om he is n already acqua9t$1 by 8 wife or si/]1 z ! case may be2 & he is expect$ to assi/ 9 ent]ta9+1 pass ! cups1 make introductions1 accompany dep>t+ gue/s to ! door & jo9 9 ! conv]sations4 ,:5 x c be arrang$ x is mo/ delightful = ! husb& & wife to receive _! fri5ds toge!r4 ,= ?is reason ev5 =mal society is l5i5t ) reg>d to "t & ,sundays may be utiliz$ = at homes1 teas1 or receptions4 ,,tak+ ,,leave ,,( ,,! ,,ho/ess ,! ho/ess is n expect$ to accompany h] dep>t+ gue/s to ! door :5 !re are o!rs /ill 9 ! room to claim h] att5tion4 ,h[ev]1 x is only a matt] ( g5u9e fri5dl9ess & polit5ess to accompany ea* dep>t+ gue/ z f> z ! draw+-room door4 ,?is rule does n hold true :5 "o ( ! gue/s is infirm1 or :5 ! ho/ess is ent]ta9+ a v di/+ui%$ visitor4 ,b ord9>ily1 x is all-suffici5t to rise :5 a gue/ moves to dep>t1 (f] "o's h& 9 cordial f>ewell1 & say1 ,good aft]noon1 ,miss ,c>y4 ,s good ( y to come1 or1 ,good-by1 ,mrs4 ,blank1 ,i hope to he> "s m ab\t t wond]ful trip to ,ea/ ,india4 ,! ho/ess cont9ues to /& until ! gue/ turns to pass out ( ! room4 ,if ! gue/ is a woman1 x is a m>k ( extreme polit5ess to rema9 /&+ until %e has left ! room entirely4 ,:5 all ! gue/s h dep>t$1 ! ho/ess usually accompanies ! la/ visitor to ! hall door2 & if x is a special fri5d1 %e is privileg$ to accompany h] to ! v /reet door4 ,h[ev]1 ! ho/ess mu/ be c>eful n to ext5d any special c\rtesies to an intimate fri5d :ile o!r gue/s are pres5t1 nor may %e draw a visitor aside to conv]se 9 an und]tone ab\t "s private or p]sonal affair4 ,on ris+ to dep>t1 a call] seeks out ! ho/ess & bids h] a =mal adieu4 ,prolong$ f>ewells are n ! be/ ta/e1 = !y keep ! ho/ess /&+ & di/ract$ :5 !re are o!rs :o are entitl$ to h] "t & att5tion4 ,z soon z "o intimates t he or %e wi%es to dep>t1 a quick b cordial f>ewell %\ld be tak5 & ! dep>ture made z soon z possible4 ,to b[ oneself out ( ! draw+-room is a =eign & :olly undemocratic cu/om :i* no well-br$ man or woman recognizes4 ,a slight incl9ation ( ! head1 a cordial good-aft]noon to ! gue/s1 & a =mal f>ewell to ! ho/ess %\ld be foll[$ by imm$iate leav+ ( ! room4 ,9 ap>tm5t h\ses x is a pretty little att5tion = ! ho/ess to accompany h] gue/ to ! elevator & r+ ! bell = h]4 ,?is %e %\ld1 ( c\rse1 n d 9 ! ev5t t !re are o!rs pres5t to claim h] att5tion4 ,a g5tleman rises f 8 seat :5 a woman ent]s & :5 %e rises to dep>t4 ,:5 tak+ leave ( ! ho/ess he waits = h] to (f] h] h&1 o!rwise he m]ely b[s & (f]s "s ^w ( f>ewell4 ,,! ,,ev5+ ,,call ,a g5tleman is privileg$ to make 8 call 9 return = a hospitality ext5d$ him 9 ! ev5+4 ,x is consid]ate ( him1 :5 he _c call 9 ! aft]noon1 to call on ! ev5+ ( ! ho/ess' day at home4 ,:5 a "y man has be5 ask$ to call by a "y lady1 he does n ask to see h] alone b reque/s ( ! s]vant at ! door t he be ann\nc$ to ! ladies4 ,?is is especially important1 = x inf]s t he expects to be pres5t$ to ! "y lady's "m or h] *ap]on4 ,aft] he has met h] "m1 x is entirely prop] = him1 :5 call+1 to reque/ to see ! p>ticul> lady = :om ! visit is int5d$4 ,a g5tleman is usually %[n into ! draw+-room by ! s]vant4 ,he reta9s 8 ov]coat & gloves until ! s]vant returns to let him "k t ! "y lady w receive him pres5tly2 !n he dive/s himself ( ^! g>m5ts & ei!r puts !m himself 9 ! hall1 or entru/s !m to ! s]vant4 ,:5 ! lady ent]s1 he rises1 /eps =w>d to meet h]1 & does n resume 8 seat until %e has seat$ h]self4 ,,:5 ,,g5tlem5 ,,receive ,,call]s ,a lady does n call ^u a g5tleman unless x is = ! purpose ( bus9ess4 ,"u su* conditions1 ! g5tleman rises1 f9ds h] a seat & proce$s imm$iately ) ! matt] ( bus9ess4 ,no social or dome/ic topics are introduc$4 ,if ! int]view is to be a %ort "o1 or if ! man is press$ = "t1 he may g out to meet ! lady 9 ! corridor or out] (fice & /& :ile he he>s h] bus9ess4 ,:5 a lady is admitt$ to 8 private (fice1 a g5tleman does n receive h] ) 8 hat on1 or ) 8 coat (f4 ,he refra9s f smok+1 & gives h] 8 :ole att5tion dur+ ! int]view4 ,if ! telephone r+s1 he mu/ excuse himself be=e answ]+ x4 ,he rises :5 ! lady is ready to leave1 op5s ! door = h]1 & accompanies h] to ! door or elevator if he wi%es to be extremely polite4 ,h[ev]1 ?is latt] c\rtesy is necess>y only :5 ! visitor is a relative or special fri5d4 ,a g5tleman m]ely b[s :5 a lady takes h] dep>ture1 unless %e h]self (f]s h] h&4 ,x is q p]missible :5 c]ta9 press+ affairs claim "o's att5tion to reque/ to be excus$ or po/pone ! bus9ess call until "s lat] date4 ,or if he wi%es h] to be brief1 ! g5tleman may c\rte\sly reque/ ! lady to d s1 & he w inv>iably f9d t %e w be only too will+ to comply ) 8 reque/4 ,b !re c be no excuse = ! man :o insi/s ^u be+ curt to wom5 :o call at 8 (fice on matt]s ( bus9ess1 any m ?an !re is an excuse = lack ( gallantry & c\rtesy 9 ! draw+-room4 ,a g5tleman receives 8 mascul9e call]s at 8 home z cordially & ) z mu* hospitality z ! lady receives h] fem99e fri5ds4 ,he mu/ obs]ve all ! rules outl9$ = ! ho/ess4 ,he greets ea* call] =mally1 makes all necess>y introductions1 sees t conv]sation runs smoo?ly & pleasantly1 & if he wi%es1 (f]s refre%m5ts4 ,:5 he has a "m or si/] to help him ent]ta91 he may invite wom5 gue/s1 & !n x is 8 duty to accompany ea* lady z f> z ! door & see t h] c> is 9 read9ess4 ,:5 ! la/ gue/ to dep>t is a g5tleman1 ! ho/ usually goes ) him z f> z ! hall door1 & assi/s him ) 8 coat4 ,,mak+ ,a ,,*ance ,,call ,v (t5 a call is return$ on "s o!r day ?an t set ap>t by ! ho/ess = ! day at home4 ,x is n always conv5i5t = fri5ds & acqua9tances to obs]ve a c]ta9 day at home1 b :5 !y call on o!r days !y always are fac$ ) unc]ta9ty4 ,( c\rse !re are "s wom5 :o d n h a def9ite day at home1 b !y may be f\nd at home almo/ any aft]noon4 ,a woman call+ on a fri5d or acqua9tance on no def9ite day makes "s su* inquiry z foll[s ( ! s]vant at ! door3 ,is ,mrs4 ,gray at home8 or1 ,are ! ladies 9 ?is aft]noon8 ,hav+ receiv$ a reply 9 ! negative1 ! call] leaves h] c>d & dep>ts4 ,!re mu/ be no que/ions z to :]e ! ladies may be1 or :at "t !y %all return1 unless "o is a p>ticul>ly intimate fri5d ( ! entire family4 ,:5 ! s]vant ann\nces at ! door t h] mi/ress is n at home1 x may mean ei!r t %e is out ( ! h\se entirely or t %e is s completely occupi$ ) bus9ess t %e is n able to ent]ta94 ,9 ei!r case1 h[ev]1 ! report ( ! s]vant mu/ be tak5 z f9al1 & x may n be que/ion$4 ,,in=mal ,,calls ,we w call x t--^! fri5dly little visits t neighbors make ^u ea* o!r 9 small] t[ns1 or 9 less fa%ionable circles4 ,in=mal calls4 ,b y may call !m fri5dly calls1 if y wi%4 ,9 small t[ns1 & especially 9 ! c\ntry1 wom5 may drop 9 = a *at ) _! neighbors any "t 9 ! aft]noon4 ,ev5 morn+ calls betwe5 t5 & "o o'clock are p]missible4 ,!re is no?+ =mal ab\t ^! calls4 ,x is n necess>y to h a liv]i$ butl] at ! door to ann\nce ! "n1 nor a small silv] tray on :i* to place ! call]'s c>d4 ,butl]s1 c>ds & =malities are all omitt$1 & ! call drops into a delightfully intimate visit4 ,x w\ld be ridicul\s to attempt to set d[n a def9ite "t limit = ^! calls4 ,!y may be z %ort z tw5ty m9utes or z long z two h\rs1 dep5d+ entirely ^u ! individuals & ! circum/ances4 ,refre%m5ts may or may n be s]v$ z "o pleases4 ,=mal greet+s & f>ewells are disp5s$ )1 & 9 _! place are cordial hellos & good-bys t are entirely conducive to good fri5d%ip4 ,if y feel t1 because y are n =tunate en\gh to own a pret5ti\s dwell+ & to hire impressive butl]s & maid-s]vants to welcome y\r gue/s1 y %\ld n make calls & h !m return$1 y are depriv+ y\rself ( a pleasure inf9itely great] ?an all elaborate display & o/5tation4 ,simple1 in=mal calls made = ! purpose ( creat+ & develop+ fri5d%ips1 & made ) a feel+ ( g5u9e cordiality & fri5dl9ess1 are ev5 m gratify+ ?an ! /iffly =mal social calls4 ,d n feel t y are obey+ etiquette's decrees :5 y neglect y\r fri5d%ips m]ely because y\r home & facilities d n w>rant ext5sive social int]c\rse4 ,true etiquette is univ]sal 9 its appeal & rea*es ! c\ntry-woman 9 h] little cottage z directly z x rea*es ! /ately d[ag] 9 h] city mansion4 ,,*apt] ,,iv ,,visit+ ,,c>ds--,,& ,,o!rs ,,y\r ,,c>d ,a ,,repres5tative ,,( ,,y ,an int]e/+ anecdote we h 9 m9d w illu/rate bett] ?an any?+ we c say1 ! importance ( ! correct c>d1 :e!r x be 9 bus9ess or social activities4 ,a r ecc5tric g5tleman discov]$ an amaz+ new commodity = :i* !re _h be5 consid]able dem& = _m ye>s4 ,he became imm$iately fam\s4 ,report]s besieg$ 8 home & (fice 9 que/ ( int]views1 b ! reports 9 ! newspap]s 7 ( ! vague/ & mo/ indef9ite4 ,he %unn$ publicity1 & absolutely refus$ to see or speak to anyone4 ,!n a brilliant "y *ap :o knew & und]/ood ! ecc5tricities ( ! inv5tor1 conceiv$ ! idea ( hav+ a special c>d engrav$ to s5d 9 to him4 ,! o!rs laugh$ at 8 fooli% idea z !y call$ x1 b he _h absolute fai? 9 8 plan4 ,he _h a neat :ite c>d engrav$ ) 8 "n & address1 mu* ! same =m & size z ! ord9>y social c>d4 ,b 9 ! l[] left-h& corn]1 9 t9y italics1 ^! words 7 pr9t$3 ,wi%es to tell ! p ! tru? ab\t y\r discov]y4 ,! c>d w5t 9 to ! inv5tor4 ,! report] 0 admitt$4 ,& 8 pap] boa/$ headl9es & columns ( />tl+ facts ! next day t no o!r pap] 9 t[n _h4 ,! v appe>ance ( ! c>d1 its neatness & its obvi\s orig9ality1 comm&$ ! att5tion ( ! man :o hat$ publicity1 & caus$ him to submit to an int]view4 ,( c\rse we _c all h special c>ds pr9t$ = c]ta9 occasions4 ,nor c we be orig9al to ! ext5t t we d n foll[ ! rules ( etiquette reg>d+ correct =ms = social c>ds4 ,b we c make our c>ds s di/9ctive1 s repres5tative ( ourselves1 t ! recipi5t w f9d z mu* pleasure 9 receiv+ !m z we 9 (f]+ !m4 ,& by di/9ctive we d n mean ! fancy or embelli%$ c>d1 b ! "o t is /rictly 9 accord ) ! rules ( good usage z outl9$ 9 ! foll[+ p>agraphs4 ,,g5]al ,,rules ,,reg>d+ ,,c>ds ,social & pr(essional c>ds %\ld be engrav$ ei!r on copp] or /eel2 pla91 readable type %\ld be us$4 ,ornate scripts t are h>dly legible %\ld be avoid$4 ,ord9>y script type is p]missible1 b x mu/ n be fancy or compris$ :olly ( sw++ fl\ri%es4 ,a pla9 lett] is always pref]able4 ,! ord9>y ,roman type1 or any new modification ( x1 or ,go?ic lett]+1 is always 9 good ta/e4 ,:5 a l>ge quantity ( c>ds is desir$1 ! copp]-plate %\ld be reque/$1 z ! greate/ numb] ( cle> impressions c be tak5 f x4 ,reque/s may also be made ( ! /ation] to use an emboss$ plate s t ! lett]s /& out 9 relief4 ,! color %\ld be :ite or cream4 ,o!r colors are 9 bad ta/e1 al?\gh sometimes buff & pale blue c>ds are us$ by pr(essional m5 & wom54 ,! /ock %\ld be ?92 n z ?9 z pap]1 b mu* ?9n] ?an t us$ = o!r k9ds ( c>ds4 ,c>ds are engrav$ ) ! own]'s "n & address1 or ) ! "n alone4 ,if x is a pr(essional c>d1 ! ^w ,arti/ or ,attorney-at-law or :atev] ! pr(ession happ5s to be may appe> 9 ! l[] left-h& corn]4 ,milit>y m5 may also pr9t _! rank or position 9 ?is corn]1 z may also pr(essors & o!rs hold+ a title ( di/9ction4 ,! engrav+ ( names & addresses %\ld nev] be 9 any color b black4 ,black engrav+ on a pure :ite c>d is ! be/ =m = ! social c>d4 ,gilt lett]+s are an indication ( ignorance1 & s are brightly color$ engrav+ or highly t9t$ pap]4 ,,size ,,( ,,c>ds ,,= ,,wom5 ,ea* new visit+ season br+s ) x new fa%ions 9 c>ds--fa%ions t *iefly affect ! size ( ! c>d4 ,?us x w\ld h>dly be practical to /ate def9itely correct sizes4 ,b we w give "h ! approximate size = ! woman's visit+ & social c>ds1 & exact in=mation c be acquir$ f "o's p]sonal /ation] or f "o ( ! curr5t magaz9es :i* run special dep>tm5ts to take c>e ( matt]s ( ?is k9d4 ,:5 a lady's c>d be>s h] "n only1 x %\ld nev] measure m ?an two & sev5-eigh?s in*es 9 l5g? & two & "o-eigh? in*es 9 wid?4 ,no c>d %\ld be small] ?an two & "o-half in*es 9 l5g? & "o & sev5-eigh?s in*es 9 wid?4 ,a d\ble c>d1 on :i* ! names ( bo? "m & daught] or bo? husb& & wife appe>1 %\ld be ab\t ?ree in*es & a half 9 l5g?1 by two & "o-half 9 wid?4 ,no decorations ( any k9d %\ld be us$ on a c>d4 ,polite society at ! pres5t "t favors pure :ite1 unglaz$ bri/ol bo>d ab\t two & two-?irds in*es 9 l5g? by two & "o-eigh? in*es 9 wid?4 ,,size ,,& ,,mat]ial ,,( ,,c>ds ,,= ,,m5 ,x is usual = a man's c>d to be n>r[] & ! lea/ bit %ort] ?an a woman's4 ,! ord9>y size is two & five-eigh?s in*es by "o & ?ree-eigh?s in*es1 b l ! woman's c>d is subject to *ange4 ,! /ation] w be able to give def9ite in=mation reg>d+ ! size ( ! man's c>d at ! pres5t "t4 ,a man's c>d is z sev]ely simple & unadorn$ z ! woman's4 ,no ornam5tation1 no fl\ri% 9 ! lett]+4 ,j pla91 readable type or script engrav$ 9 black ^u :ite4 ,! c>d itself %\ld be ( poli%$1 b n glaz$1 bri/ol bo>d1 ! k9d t is flexible & ?94 ,"s g5tlem5 h _! c>ds made ( especially ?9 /ock to avoid bulky c>d cases or wai/coat pockets4 ,a ba*elor may h 8 home address engrav$ 9 ! l[] "r-h& corn] ( 8 c>d1 ) ! "n ( 8 favorite club opposite4 ,if he resides entirely at 8 club1 ! "n is engrav$ 9 ! l[] "r-h& corn]4 ,x is bad =m to h a bus9ess address engrav$ on "o's social visit+ c>d4 ,an at-home day is nev] giv5 on a g5tleman's c>d1 b appe>s 9 ! l[] left-h& corn] ( 8 wife's c>d4 ,a ba*elor is n expect$ to devote a def9ite day to ! ent]ta9+ ( call]s unless he is an arti/ ) a /udio4 ,,titles ,,on ,,c>ds ,,= ,,wom5 ,a woman's visit+ c>d %\ld be engrav$ solely ) h] "n1 address & day at home4 ,any decorations su* z gild$ edges1 cre/s or sup]flu\s engrav+s are an indication ( bad ta/e4 ,9 ,am]ica a lady nev] assumes any title o!r ?an ,mrs4 or ,miss on h] social c>d4 ,!re is only "o exception to ?is rule3 a pr(essional woman may use h] title ( doctor ( m$ic9e1 etc4 ,9 ?is case1 ev5 ?\gh %e is m>ri$1 %e drops h] husb&'s ,*ri/ian names & signs h]self ,m>ian ,m4 ,br[n+1 ,m4,d4 ,a woman does n %>e1 on h] c>ds1 ! honor>y titles ( h] husb&4 ,= in/ance1 ! wife ( our presid5t has h] c>ds engrav$ ,mrs4 ,w>r5 ,gamaliel ,h>d+4 ,! wife ( a secret>y1 judge1 g5]al or admiral does n use any title o!r ?an ,mrs4 ,ev5 ! woman :o is a successful physician %\ld n use h] title on h] social c>ds1 unless1 z expla9$ above1 %e is eld]ly4 ,x is wise = a woman physician to h two sets ( c>ds1 "o ) h] "n & title1 & ) h] (fice h\rs 9 ! corn]1 ! o!r ) h] "n alone1 & h] h\se address 9 ! corn]4 ,a physician's social c>d %\ld be engrav$ simply ,miss ,m>ian ,mansfield ,br[n+4 ,x is always bett] =m to give 9 full ! ,*ri/ian "n or names1 z well z ! surname4 ,x is n ta/eful to indicate by an initial only ! husb&'s fir/ "n1 & engrave 8 middle "n1 ?us3 ,mrs4 ,j4 ,h5ry ,williams4 ,bo? names %\ld be giv5 9 full4 ,x is n consid]$ dignifi$ to use abbreviations ( a husb&'s "n1 z ,frank = ,francis1 ,alec = ,alex&]1 ,joe = ,joseph4 ,nor %\ld an unm>ri$ woman use su* abbreviations ( h] "n z ,polly1 ,sally1 ,dolly1 etc4 ,! wife :o is ! s5ior matron ( ! s5ior bran* ( a family may drop bo? h] husb&'s fir/ & middle names f h] c>ds1 & h !m read simply3 ,mrs4 ,rob9son4 ,h] elde/ unm>ri$ daught] is entitl$ to use a c>d read+3 ,miss ,rob9son4 ,:5 ! "n is a v ord9>y "o l ,br[n or ,smi?1 x is always wis] to use ! ,*ri/ian names to avoid confusion4 ,a sp9/]1 or z ! mod]n woman likes to call h]self1 ! ba*elor girl1 may n use c>ds engrav$ m]ely ,miss ,gray1 unless %e is ! olde/ daught] ( a family4 ,%e has h] c>ds engrav$ 9 ei!r ( ! ?ree foll[+ =ms3 ,miss ,m>y ,hammond ,gray or ,miss ,m>y ,h4 ,gray or j ,miss ,m>y ,gray4 ,! fir/ initial %\ld nev] be us$1 except :5 ! "y lady is kn[n by h] middle "n1 unless pr(essional purposes dem& x4 ,mrs4 ,john ,jay ,holmes #ab ,we/ ,/reet ,miss ,hel5 ,holmes #ab ,we/ ,/reet ,,c>ds ,,= ,,wid[s ,a wid[ is privileg$ to reta9 h] husb&'s ,*ri/ian "n on h] c>d if %e wi%es1 unless h] elde/ son is m>ri$ & be>s ! full "n ( 8 deceas$ fa!r4 ,9 ?is case1 ( c\rse1 !re w\ld be confusion1 & x is mu* wis] = h] to h h] c>ds engrav$ ) h] own ,*ri/ian & middle names1 9 ?is mann]3 ,mrs4 ,lucille ,may ,hopk9s4 ,if !re is no reason = h] to drop h] husb&'s ,*ri/ian & middle names aft] 8 dea?1 %e may sign h]self3 ,mrs4 ,h5ry ,waltam ,hopk9s4 ,at ! pres5t "t1 x is good =m = ! woman :o has be5 divorc$ to use h] maid5 surname ) ! surname ( ! divorc$ or deceas$ husb&1 dropp+ all ,*ri/ian names4 ,?us a woman ^: maid5 "n 0 ,h>ris w\ld h h] c>ds engrav$ ,mrs4 ,h>ris ,smi? if %e is divorc$ f h] husb&4 ,! "n1 ev5 if %e resumes h] full maid5 "n1 %\ld be prefix$ by ,mrs41 nev] by ,miss4 ,a wid[ %\ld avoid foll[+ ! /yle prescrib$ = a divorc$ woman1 s9ce x is likely to cause emb>rass+ ambiguity4 ,x is fully p]missible = a wid[ to revive h] maid5 "n aft] sev]al ye>s ( wid[hood4 ,! divorc$ woman1 h[ev]1 may n use h] maid5 "n on h] c>ds until !re has be5 a legal annulm5t ( h] m>riage1 9 :i* case1 z 0 /at$ above1 %e uses x ) ! title ,mrs41 n ,miss4 ,,! ,,"y ,,lady',s ,,c>d ,:5 a "y lady has be5 =mally introduc$ to society by h] "m1 %e uses = h] fir/ ye> ( calls1 c>ds t be> h] "n bel[ t ( h] "m4 ,%e assumes a private c>d only :5 %e is no long] a dbutante4 ,! jo9t c>d1 z x is call$1 %\ld be l>g] 9 size ?an ! c>d h] "m ord9>ily uses1 & ! "y lady's ,*ri/ian & middle names %\ld be us$ unless %e is ! elde/ daught] ( ! family4 ,a model c>d appe>s bel[3 ,mrs4 ,rob]t ,cole ,miss ,jean ,evelyn ,cole ,tuesdays ,s\? ,/reet ,:5 "m & daught] pay calls toge!r1 ?is "o c>d s]ves = bo?4 ,b :5 ! daught] makes calls alone1 %e runs a p5cil l9e lightly ?r\gh h] "m's "n--unless1 ( c\rse1 %e is m]ely leav+ c>ds & n mak+ =mal calls4 ,! "m does n use ! d\ble c>d :5 call+ alone1 unless %e is leav+ c>ds = h]self & h] daught]4 ,v (t5 ! d\ble c>d1 ) ! "n ( "m & daught]1 is us$ ev5 aft] ! daught] has em]g$ f h] dbutante%ip1 :5 bo? are visit+ toge!r4 ,9 less =mal society ! daught] has h] own c>d be>+ only h] "n1 ) or )\t title1 :i* %e uses :5ev] ! occasion dem&s x1 & 9 _m in/ances1 ev5 :5 %e makes h] db %e has a c>d ( h] own :i* %e uses in/ead ( or 9 addition to ! "o :i* %e %>es ) h] "m4 ,:5 daught]s make _! db 9 society at ! same "t1 ! "n ( ! "m appe>s ne>e/ ! top1 z be=e1 directly bel[ x is ,miss ,cole = ! elde/ daught]1 & bel[ t ,miss ,edna ,cole = h] y\ng] si/]4 ,! =m ,! ,misses ,cole may also be us$ :5 !re are two or ?ree daught]s4 ,! jo9t c>d is us$ to ann\nce ! address & at-home day1 at ! beg9n+ ( ! season2 b x is also us$ :5 ! ladies ( a family s5d a w$d+ gift ) _! c>d1 :5 !y s5d fl[]s to an invalid$ fri5d or :5 !y make calls ( condol5ce or congratulation toge!r4 ,!re are sev]al o!r d\ble1 or jo9t1 c>ds us$ besides ^? ( ! "m & daught]4 ,a mo!rless girl1 liv+ ) h] fa!r1 may c\ple h] "n ) 84 ,si/]s :o h no p>5ts may use a d\ble c>d ) ! "n ( ! old] engrav$ above t ( ! y\ng]1 or ) ! simple inscription1 ,! ,misses ,gray4 ,a si/] :o is unm>ri$ (t5 %>es a jo9t c>d ) a m>ri$ si/]1 :5 !y are liv+ toge!r4 ,a *ap]on & mo!rless girl1 an aunt & unm>ri$ niece are entitl$ to use jo9t c>ds if !y wi%4 ,aft] h] fir/ season1 a "y lady1 :5 call+ alone1 uses h] own c>d4 ,h[ev]1 if h] "m is an active ho/ess :o issues h] c>ds e season & receives ) h] daught]s1 %e does n indicate a day at home on h] p]sonal c>ds4 ,a supply ( d\ble c>ds %\ld always be available :5 !re are daught]s 9 ! family1 ev5 ?\gh !y issue _! own c>ds1 = _m in/ances arise :5 ! d\ble c>d is m acceptable ?an any o!r4 ,,indicat+ ,,! ,,day ,,at ,,home ,! l[] left-h& corn] ( ! visit+ c>d is res]v$ = ! day at home4 ,if "o day ea* week--or r "o aft]noon f ?ree until six o'clock ea* week--is devot$ to ! ent]ta9+ ( visitors1 ! ^w ,fridays or ,tuesdays is engrav$ 9 ! corn]4 ,!re ne$ be no explanation1 no fur!r details1 unless ! ho/ess = "s reason wi%es to /ate ! h\rs dur+ :i* %e w be receiv+1 9 :i* case x is q p]missible to add !m to ! names ( ! day or days4 ,sometimes p>ticul> limits are set on ! days at home4 ,= in/ance "s ho/esses are at home only "o aft]noon 9 e second1 or e ?ird1 week4 ,?is requires special word+4 ,= in/ance1 ,fir/ & ,f\r? ,w$nesdays or ,fir/ ,fridays 7mean+ fir/ ,fridays 9 ! mon?74 ,"o may also set a "t limit by hav+ "o's c>ds engrav$3 ,tuesdays until ,l5t or ,mondays until ,april1 or ,w$nesdays1 ,decemb] #i--af--bc4 ,,! ,,m>ri$ ,,c\ple',s ,,c>d ,! m>ri$ woman f9ds _m occasions to use ! c>d t is engrav$ ) h] husb&'s & h] "n4 ,x is nev] us$ to ann\nce h] day at home1 unless he is to receive ) h]1 ?\gh %e may use x :5 call+1 if %e wi%es4 ,! d\ble c>d = a m>ri$ c\ple is l>g] ?an ! individual c>d1 b j ab\t ! size ( ! d\ble c>d us$ = "m & daught]4 ,a model is %[n bel[4 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,blake #bjj ,we/ ,end ,av5ue ,brides use ! jo9t c>d :5 return+ calls made ^u !m aft] _! return f ! honeymoon4 ,x is also cu/om>y = su* a c>d to be inclos$ ) a w$d+ invitation or ) an ann\ncem5t ( m>riage1 to give ! unit$ names ( ! c\ple ) _! future address & day at home4 ,if ?is la/ plan is n foll[$1 ! bride po/s1 imm$iately ^u h] return home1 a d\ble c>d be>+ h] address & day at home1 to all h] own & h] husb&'s fri5ds4 ,! d\ble c>d is !n r>ely us$1 except = su* occasions z :5 husb& & wife s5d a gift toge!r1 or pay calls ( inquiry1 condol5ce or congratulation toge!r4 ,,us+ ,,jr4 ,,& ,,sr4 ,jr4 is a contraction ( ! ^w ,junior2 ,sr4 is a contraction ( ! ^w ,s5ior4 ,^! suffixes are n g5]ally us$ on wom5's c>ds1 b !re are sev]al occasions :5 !y are necess>y4 ,!re is1 = in/ance1 ! lady ^: husb& be>+ ! same "n z 8 fa!r lives 9 ! same t[n4 ,h] c>ds mu/ be> ! suffix ,jr4 if !y are n to be confus$ ) ! c>ds ( h] "m-9-law4 ,9 ?is in/ance1 if ! "m-9-law 7 a wid[ us+ h] husb&'s full "n1 x w\ld be necess>y = h] to add ! ^w ,s5ior1 or its abbreviation1 ,sr41 aft] h] "n to avoid hav+ x confus$ ) t ( h] daught]-9-law4 ,! latt] w\ld1 9 ?is case1 omit ! ,jr4 f h] c>ds4 ,if bo? wom5 lo/ _! husb&s1 & bo? wi%$ to reta9 ! husb&'s ,*ri/ian names on _! c>ds1 ! discrim9at+ ,jr4 & ,sr4 %\ld be us$4 ,^! suffixes d n h to be us$ if ! y\ng] wid[ only reta9s ! ,*ri/ian names ( h] husb&1 & ! old] woman revives ! use ( h] own ,*ri/ian & middle names4 ,jr4 & ,sr4 may appe> on ! c>ds 9 _! abbreviat$ =ms4 ,inde$1 x is pref]able if ! "n is a long "o4 ,,titles ,,on ,,c>ds ,,= ,,m5 ,a g5tleman's c>d %\ld always be> "s di/+ui%+ title4 ,! only "t :5 ,mr4 may be omitt$1 is :5 ,jr4 or ,sr4 foll[s ! "n1 or :5 "s honor>y title is conf]r$4 ,a boy "u sixte5 may h a c>d :i* be>s only 8 "n )\t title4 ,undignifi$ abbreviations or contractions ( names %\ld nev] be us$ on a g5tleman's c>d4 ,! inscription %\ld read3 ,mr4 ,rob]t ,w4 ,blake or1 pref]ably1 ,mr4 ,rob]t ,walt] ,blake4 ,su* contractions z ,mr4 ,bob ,blake or ,mr4 ,r4 ,walt] ,blake are disc\nt5anc$ by good society4 ,only ! g5tleman :o repres5ts ! head ( ! s5ior bran* ( 8 family may use a c>d ) 8 "n engrav$ simply1 ,mr4 ,blake4 ,v (t5 a ba*elor has 8 home address engrav$ 9 ! l[] "r-h& corn] ( 8 c>d1 ) ! "n ( 8 favorite club 9 ! corn] opposite4 ,if he resides entirely at 8 club1 its "n occupies ! place usually res]v$ on ! c>d = home addresses4 ,an at-home day is nev] giv5 on a g5tleman's c>d1 unless he is an arti/ & has _m fri5ds :o are fond ( com+ to 8 /udio4 ,9 ! army1 only ^? m5 ^: ranks are above capta9 use _! milit>y title on _! visit+ c>ds4 ,o!rs use m]ely ! prefix ,mr4 ,m5 :o are (fic]s ( volunte] regim5ts are n entitl$ to ! use ( milit>y titles on _! c>ds1 & !y %\ld be c>eful to use only ,mr4 be=e _! names4 ,a capta91 major1 or colonel 9 ! army signifies 9 ! corn] ( ! c>d :e!r 8 comm& is 9 ! artill]y1 ! infantry1 or ! cavalry4 ,a ,ju/ice ( ! ,supreme ,c\rt has 8 c>ds engrav$ ) ! title ,mr4 ,ju/ice prec$+ 8 "n1 ?us3 ,mr4 ,ju/ice ,john ,emmonds ,g>y4 ,lawy]s & judges ( ! l[] c\rts may use only ! prefix ,mr4 ,presid5ts ( colleges1 (fic]s ( ! navy1 physicians & cl]gym5 all signify _! (fice1 rank or pr(ession on _! c>ds4 ,a physician may h 8 c>d engrav$ 9 ei!r ( ^! two approv$ mann]s3 ,dr4 ,ev]ett ,johnson or ,ev]ett ,johnson1 ,m4,d4 ,a cl]gyman :o has receiv$ 8 degree does n use ! title ,dr41 b has 8 c>ds engrav$1 ,elm] ,j4 ,burnham1 ,d4,d4 ,o!r m5 ) honor>y titles foll[ a simil> /yle4 ,memb]s ( ! cab9et1 if !y wi%1 may h _! c>ds =mally engrav$ ,! ,secret>y ( ,/ate1 ,! ,secret>y ( ,w>1 ,! ,secret>y ( ! ,int]ior1 etc4 ,a s5ator1 h[ev]1 may use only ! prefix ,mr41 hav+ 8 c>ds engrav$ ,mr4 ,johnson4 ,( c\rse ! presid5t & vice-presid5t1 & ambassadors indicate _! (fice & rank on _! c>d1 z d also all pr(essors & deans ( colleges4 ,a memb] ( ! faculty ( ,yale w\ld h 8 c>ds inscrib$1 ,mr4 ,walt] ,beacon ,cl>k1 ,yale ,univ]sity4 ,=eign consuls & repres5tatives use only ! title ,mr4 ,bus9ess addresses %\ld nev] be us$ on a g5tleman's social c>d4 ,a physician or cl]gyman ne$ n foll[ ?is rule1 provid$ t no (fice h\rs are giv54 ,mr4 ,rob]t ,liv+/on #d ,we/ ,t5? ,/reet ,,pr(essional ,,c>ds ,,= ,,m5 ,pr(essional c>ds & visit+ c>ds %\ld always be kept di/9ct f ea* o!r4 ,! physician :o uses 8 pr(essional c>d1 ) bus9ess h\rs engrav$ on x1 = a social call1 is committ+ an irretrievable blund] 9 etiquette4 ,a physician has ! privilege ( *oos+ ei!r ( two =ms = 8 pr(essional c>d4 ,he may prefix 8 "n ) ,dr4 or add ! initials ,m4,d4 to x4 ,9 ! l[] "r-h& corn] ( ! c>d1 8 h\se address is engrav$2 & 9 ! opposite corn]1 8 (fice h\rs4 ,= 8 social c>ds1 ! physician omits ! (fice h\rs & uses ,m4,d4 aft] 8 "n r ?an ,dr4 be=e x4 ,rev4 or ,rev]5d1 is ! approv$ title = a cl]gyman4 ,c>ds are engrav$3 ,rev]5d ,raymond ,falke ,flem+ or ,rev4 ,raymond ,f4 ,flem+4 ,a cl]gyman :o is entitl$ to ! degree ( doctor may use all 8 titles on 8 pr(essional c>ds1 b has 8 social c>d engrav$ m]ely3 ,ralph ,k5drick ,williams1 ,d4,d4 ,n infrequ5tly x happ5s t a man has occasion to write 8 "n on a c>d ) 8 own h&4 ,9 ?is case he does n omit ! conv5tional ,mr41 or 8 honor>y titles1 b writes 8 "n id5tically z x w\ld appe> if engrav$4 ,no c>d %\ld be cr[d$ ) a great deal ( in=mation b a bus9ess c>d may be> :atev] is necess>y really to repres5t ! p]son ^: "n appe>s ^u x4 ,! salesman or o!r repres5tative ( a l>ge firm has ! "n ( ! firm on 8 bus9ess c>d & ! man :o is 9 a highly specializ$ k9d ( "w su* z adv]tis+1 may h ! ^w ,adv]tis+ engrav$ on 8 c>d4 ,an ag5t = a p>ticul> k9d ( commodity may h ?is fact indicat$ on 8 bus9ess c>d4 ,su* details h1 ( c\rse1 absolutely no place on ! social c>d4 ,,c>ds ,,= ,,m\rn+ ,! tradition ( edg+ a c>d ) black 9 def]5ce to ! dead c be trac$ back to ! anci5t ,patagonians :o us$ black pa9t to d5ote ! pass+ ( a _s4 ,!y pa9t$ _! bodies black1 if !y 7 ne> relatives ( ! deceas$1 & pa9t$ all ! belong+s ( ! dead man or woman black4 ,?is may n h be5 s mu* m\rn+ z x 0 fe>1 = ^! p ( long ago 7 afraid ( dea?1 & !y us$ ! dea?-color l>gely to please ! _s ( ! "o :o di$4 ,p]haps ! black-bord]$ m\rn+ c>ds we use to-day are us$ m 9 ! _s ( o/5tation & display r ?an t ( m\rn+4 ,unless "o is truly sorr[+ ov] ! dea? ( "s de> "o1 m\rn+ c>ds %\ld n be us$4 ,:5 !y are us$1 ! bord]s %\ld be v n>r[--nev] m ?an "o-f\r? ( an in*4 ,!y %\ld n be c>ri$ by p :o are n 9 /rict m\rn+ g>m5ts4 ,dur+ ! fir/ ye> ( wid[hood1 ! m\rn+ c>d %\ld h a black bord] "o-f\r? ( an in* deep4 ,! second ye> ! bord] may be dim9i%$ "o-sixte5? ( an in*2 & e six mon?s aft] t1 ! same am\nt may be detract$ f ! bord]1 until m\rn+ is put (f entirely4 ,a wid[]'s c>d has a bord] n>r[] ?an ! wid['s 9 proportion to ! size ( _! respective c>ds4 ,x1 too1 is gradually decreas$ 9 wid? until ! end ( ! m\rn+ p]iod4 ,?is graduation1 or r gradual n>r[+1 ( ! bord] is n us$ 9 ! m\rn+ ( a si/]'s1 bro!r's or p>5t's dea?4 ,= ^! relatives1 a bord] n less ?an a sixte5? or m ?an an eigh? ( an in* 9 wid? %\ld be us$4 ,m\rn+ c>ds %\ld n be assum$ = an uncle1 aunt or c\s91 unless g5u9e sorr[ & he>tfelt sympa?y are felt4 ,a bord] t is a sixte5? ( an in* 9 wid? is suffici5t = ! complete p]iod ( m\rn+ = ^! latt] relatives4 ,! m\rn+ c>ds ( p>5ts & wid[s %\ld be> ! broade/ black bord]s1 b ev5 !y mu/ n exce$ ! conv5tional wid?1 :i* is n m ?an "o-f\r? ( an in*4 ,v wide1 gl>+ bord]s d5ote bad ta/e on ! "p ( ! own]4 7,see footnote7#a #a ,!re seems to be a t5d5cy = wid[s to use1 ! fir/ ye> ( _! m\rn+1 c>ds t h bord]s measur+ "o-?ird ( an in* 9 wid?4 ,c]ta9ly if "o is 9 deep m\rn+1 & g5u9ely sorr[+1 a bord] ( ?is wid? is p]missible4 ,b ! "o-qu>t] in* bord]1 v>y+ d[n to "o-sixte5? ( an in*1 is always pref]r$1 always 9 bett] ta/e4 ,,:5 ,,! ,,woman ,,goes ,a-,,call+ ,a visit+ c>d is always left on ! hall table or on ! c>d tray1 if x is n giv5 to ! s]vant4 ,! call] mu/ on no occasion c>ry x 9 & pres5t x to h] ho/ess l a billet d'admission4 ,a woman nev] pres5ts x h]self to h] ho/ess4 ,:5 ! call is made on ! ho/ess' day at home1 c>ds are left on ! tray 9 ! hall z ea* call] passes ?r\gh to ! draw+- or reception-room4 ,if x is ! fir/ call ( ! season1 to t p>ticul> fri5d or acqua9tance1 %e places "o ( h] own c>ds & "o ( h] husb&'s 9 ! tray4 ,subsequ5t calls ( ! season d n require "o ( h] own c>ds left ea* "t 9 ! tray2 b if ! call is made 9 return = "s hospitality or ent]ta9m5t accord$ h] & h] husb&1 %e leaves two ( ! latt]'s c>ds--provid$1 only1 t ! ho/ess is a m>ri$ woman4 ,until ab\t #ahic1 wom51 :5 pay+ calls & f9d+ t ! ho/ess 0 n at home1 turn$ d[n ! left corn] ( ! c>d t[>ds ! c5t]1 to indicate t all ! wom5 memb]s ( ! family 7 includ$ 9 ! call4 ,if ! "r corn] 0 also turn$ d[n1 x meant t ! visitor came to make a =mal call1 n = ! simple purpose ( c>d-leav+4 ,?is cu/om has be5 entirely elim9at$ 9 ,am]ica1 at any rate1 ?\gh x /ill prevails 9 c]ta9 =eign c\ntries4 ,& rightly s1 = x is bo? affect$ & untidy4 ,,:5 ,,m ,,?an ,,"o ,,c>d ,,is ,,left ,a wife beg9n+ h] r\nds ( fir/ calls1 leaves two ( h] husb&'s c>ds ) "o ( h] own4 ,%e repeats ?is :5 %e comes to congratulate or condole1 & :5 %e pays h] f9al calls ( ! season4 ,x is wise = a wife always to c>ry a numb] ( h] husb&'s c>ds 9 h] c>d case1 z %e is (t5 call$ ^u to use !m = su* social occasions t ! busy bus9ess man is loa? to att5d4 ,if a wife calls ^u a fri5d :o is ent]ta9+ = a fri5d or relative & ! invitation includ$ h] husb&1 %e leaves ?ree ( 8 c>ds ) "o ( h] own if ! ho/ess is a m>ri$ woman1 two ( 8 & "o ( h]s if %e is s+le4 ,%e nev] leaves "o ( h] husb&'s c>ds = an unm>ri$ daught]4 ,%e %\ld n use ! c>d be>+ bo? h] "n & t ( h] husb& b %\ld use two sep>ate c>ds :5 x is 9 connection ) social calls4 ,etiquette does n p]mit a woman to leave a c>d = a man4 ,%e may call on a man only = ! purpose ( bus9ess1 & !n %e uses h] bus9ess c>ds1 if %e has !m1 in/ead ( h] social ones4 ,a m>ri$ woman call+ ^u a s+le woman :o is ! ho/ess & mi/ress ( h] own home1 leaves "o ( h] own c>ds & "o ( h] husb&'s1 or ! jo9t c>d :i* is engrav$1 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,william ,allan ,beck=d4 ,9 _m in/ances x may seem m c\rte\s to leave m ?an "o c>d1 b a woman call+ alone %\ld nev] leave m ?an ?ree4 ,x has n be5 _m ye>s s9ce %e 0 almo/ compell$ to leave half a doz5 or m b common s5se int]v5$ & ?is cu/om l mo/ o!rs has be5 simplifi$4 ,,"s ,,m ,,po9ts ,,ab\t ,,calls ,,& ,,c>ds ,a "y lady dur+ h] fir/ ye> 9 society may leave h] "n on ! same c>d ) h] "m's4 ,if !re are two dbutante daught]s1 ! jo9t c>d is made to suffice = all ?ree4 ,if a "y lady us+ sep>ate c>ds calls on a fri5d's day at home1 %e may put two c>ds into ! tray on ent]+1 if ! ho/ess is receiv+ ) a fri5d or daught]1 or %e may leave only "o c>d1 if %e pref]s4 ,?is is done only :5 ! call is ! fir/ ( ! season1 or :5 x is 9 return = "s ent]ta9m5t4 ,o!rwise1 if ! "y lady is a frequ5t visitor to ! h\se1 & calls on h] fri5d's day at home1 %e ne$ n leave h] c>d4 ,nei!r a matron nor a "y lady may leave a c>d = a mascul9e memb] ( ! h\sehold4 ,a "y lady pay+ a *ance call on a "m & daught]s1 & be+ told t ! ladies are out1 leaves two ( h] c>ds4 ,an unm>ri$ woman call+ on h] m>ri$ fri5d leaves b "o c>d4 ,b if ?is fri5d has a fri5d or relative receiv+ ) h]1 or if %e has a daught] or daught]s 9 society1 !n a c>d is left = ea* ( ! ladies4 ,an unm>ri$ woman1 liv+ ) a fa!r or bro!r1 & act+ z mi/ress ( ! h\sehold1 has c>ds left = h] z c>efully z ! matron4 ,a wid[ mu/ also be giv5 scrupul\s att5tion 9 ! matt] ( c>ds4 ,a "y lady :o calls aft] a dance1 d9n] or !at] p>ty leaves a c>d = ! "m ( ! "y fri5d ^u :om %e calls4 ,if a "m gives a dance or d9n] 9 honor ( h] son j return$ f college1 or j leav+ = college1 ! ladies :o att5d call aft]w>d only on ! ho/ess & leave _! c>ds = h]4 ,sometimes1 "o calls ^u a fri5d or acqua9tance at a hotel or inn4 ,if ! ladies are out1 ! call] leaves c>ds m>k$ = ! p]sons !y are int5d$1 9 p5cil4 ,o!rwise !y are likely to g a/ray1 consid]+ ! indiff]5ce & c>elessness ( ! av]age s]vants4 ,x is also cu/om>y = bo? m5 & wom51 :5 pay+ calls 9 /range neighborhoods1 to write on _! c>ds _! tempor>y address4 ,! corn] t is opposite t us$ = ! p]man5t address is devot$ to ! fill+-9 ( ?is tempor>y address4 ,,! ,,*ance ,,calls ,if a m>ri$ woman calls 9 return = "s hospitality %[n h] & h] husb&1 %e leaves two ( h] own c>ds & two ( 84 ,b if x is j a social call1 %e leaves only h] own c>d4 ,9 ?is latt] case1 %e asks at ! door to see ! ladies4 ,if %e is in=m$ t !y are n at home1 %e gives ! c>d to ! maid & dep>ts4 ,on ! o!r h&1 if ! ladies are at home1 ! c>d is plac$ on ! tray 9 ! hall1 & ! call] goes into ! draw+-room to be welcom$ by h] fri5ds4 ,if ! maid does n "k :e!r or n ! ladies are at home1 & says %e w see1 ! call] gives h] own c>d & goes into ! draw+-room to wait fur!r ^w f ! maid4 ,%\ld ! ladies be out1 %e leaves two ( h] husb&'s c>ds on ! c>d tray 9 ! hall be=e leav+4 ,if ! ladies are at home1 %e does n deposit h] husb&'s c>ds 9 ! tray until h] dep>ture4 ,v (t5 a lady w call on a v good fri5d1 m = a fri5dly little talk & = companion%ip ?an = social duty4 ,9 ?is case1 %e is privileg$ to s5d up only "o c>d2 & leave x beh9d1 :e!r t lady is out or 91 )\t any o!r c>ds4 ,,simple ,,c>d-,,leav+ ,frequ5tly1 c>ds are left :5 !re is no int5tion on ! "p ( ! own] to make a call4 ,to return calls made ^u "o1 by p]si/5t c>d-leav+1 is to indicate t "o wi%es to draw a fri5d%ip to a close4 ,x is accompli%$ m]ely by leav+ a c>d1 on no p>ticul> at-home day b simply by *ance1 & by mak+ no inquiries ( ! s]vant4 ,"o says to a s]vant1 ,please =w>d ^! c>ds to ,miss ,adams or1 ,^! c>ds are = ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,blakelock4 ,!re are sev]al exceptions--sev]al occasions :5 c>ds may be left )\t a =mal call & /ill indicate no desire to t]m9ate an acqua9tance%ip4 ,x is only p]si/5t c>d-leav+ t is indicative ( ?is latt]4 ,a lady 9 m\rn+1 = in/ance1 is privileg$ to leave h] c>ds only 9 return = invitations %e may h receiv$4 ,x is prop] = p 9 m\rn+ to leave c>ds = all ^? p]sons :o call$ aft] ! burial to leave c>ds ( condol5ce2 ^! return c>ds are usually black-bord]$1 & !y are left ab\t "o mon? aft] ! fun]al4 ,ano!r cu/om t rema9s un*ang$ ?r\gh ! con/ant evolution ( social culture1 is t ( leav+ c>ds = ! bride's "m :5 invitations to ! *ur* c]emony only are receiv$1 & :5 ! bride's "m is a /rang] to ! p]son invit$4 ,^u receiv+ ! ann\ncem5t ( a w$d+1 ! prop] ?+ to d is to leave c>ds = ! bride's "m1 ev5 ?\gh %e is a total /rang]4 ,c>ds mu/ be left by ea* gue/ = ! lady :o has ent]ta9$ a club1 *>ity or lit]>y organization1 at h] home4 ,!y s]ve ! same purpose z c>ds t are left aft] an ent]ta9m5t or hospitality on ! "p ( ! ho/ess4 ,! cu/om ( c>d-leav+ )\t a call is also obs]v$ :5 a fri5d or acqua9tance goes to a home t has be5 visit$ by dea?4 ,,%\ld ,a ,,/rang] ,,leave ,,c>ds8 ,! "q has (t5 be5 ask$1 :e!r or n a man or woman be+ ent]ta9$ by fri5ds1 is obligat$ to leave c>ds :5 !y accompany ^? fri5ds on calls4 ,!re are c]ta9 v>y+ conditions t gov]n ! answ] to ?is "q4 ,! /rang] is invit$ to accompany ! call] prim>ily z a matt] ( conv5i5ce4 ,if ! p]son visit$ is n at home1 no "q ( c>d-leav+ is involv$--only ! fri5d leaves c>ds & n ! /rang]4 ,b if ! ho/ess is f\nd at home1 & if ! /rang] int5ds to sp5d at lea/ two weeks 9 ! neighborhood1 x is necess>y = him1 or h]1 to leave c>ds4 ,x is n necess>y = ! /rang] to leave c>ds :5 ! visit 9 ! neighborhood is to be a %ort "o1 & ! call is entirely a matt] ( conv5i5ce4 ,if no c>d is left1 ! ho/ess w und]/& t no call is expect$ 9 return1 & t ! /rang] expects no invitations to ! com+ social activities 9 ! neighborhood4 ,sometimes a man or woman accompanies a fri5d or relative to ! home ( a /rang]1 = ! purpose1 previ\sly arrang$1 ( be+ introduc$ & pay+ a fir/ call4 ,"h ! etiquette ( c>d-leav+ is cle>ly def9$4 ,if ! call is made on ! day at home1 ! call] leaves 8 or h] c>ds on ! hall table1 j z = any o!r fir/ call4 ,b if x happ5s to be a *ance call1 & ! ho/ess is n at home1 ! /rang] leaves c>ds ) ^? ( a fri5d4 ,:5 two wom5 pay a *ance call toge!r1 & "o is a p]fect /rang] at ! h\se visit$1 no "q ( c>d etiquette arises if ! ho/ess is n at home4 ,b if %e is at home1 ! /rang] may p5cil 8 or h] "n on ! c>d t ! fri5d s5ds up4 ,no c>d is left by ?is /rang]1 unless he has be5 cordially ent]ta9$ 9 ! ho/ess' draw+-room1 s]v$ ) tea1 & unless ! ho/ess has express$ a desire ( meet+ him1 or h]1 aga94 ,9 ?is case1 a c>d is left :5 ! /rang] is dep>t+1 & a return call is expect$4 ,,c>ds ,,& ,,bus9ess ,,calls ,! laws ( social call+ & c>d-leav+ d n hold true :5 a bus9ess call is made4 ,a special set ( rules takes c>e ( all bus9ess calls t ! woman may make4 ,! usage :i* gov]ns ! woman :o is call+ ^u a man on a matt] ( bus9ess has already be5 describ$4 ,%e does n s5d 9 h] c>d4 ,to give h] "n to ! att5dant1 /at+ h] bus9ess1 or to write bo? on a slip ( pap] provid$ = ! purpose1 is suffici5t4 ,if ! bus9ess call is made on a woman :o is a /rang] to ! o!r woman :o is mak+ ! call1 x is necess>y to s5d 9 "o c>d1 inscrib$ ) ! "n ( ! call] & a few p5cil$ words reg>d+ ! nature ( ! bus9ess4 ,or ! c>d may be s5t 9 ) a brief ^w to ! s]vant reg>d+ ! purpose ( ! call4 ,two wom5 :o are on *>ity committees1 or o!r committees1 toge!r1 :o are social equals b :o d n ex*ange c>ds & calls1 h a special c>d etiquette to foll[ :5 call+ ^u ea* o!r reg>d+ matt]s ( mutual int]e/ on ! committee4 ,! call] s5ds up "o ( h] own p]sonal c>ds ) a ^w or two expla9+ ! object ( ! call4 ,?is c>d is left ) ! s]vant to give to ! ho/ess if %e is n at home4 ,,:5 ,a ,,man ,,leaves ,,c>ds ,all ! rules ( c>d-leav+ outl9$ = ! woman :o foll[s ! dictates ( social call+1 may be appli$ to ! well-br$ "y man--b ) ! foll[+ exceptions3 ,a man nev] leaves ! c>ds ( any o!r man1 nor does he assume any ( ! c>d-leav+ duties incurr$ by ! fem99e memb]s ( 8 family4 ,:5 call+ on a lady's aft]noon at home1 ! g5tleman leaves "o c>d = ! ho/ess & "o = ! ho/ on ! c>d tray1 on ent]+ ! h\se4 ,:e!r ! ho/ is at home or n1 if ! call] is acqua9t$ ) him1 he mu/ leave "o ( 8 c>ds = him1 provid$ t ! call is be+ made 9 return = "s hospitality enjoy$4 ,if !re is a "y daught] 9 ! family ) :om ! call] is acqua9t$1 a ?ird c>d mu/ be left4 ,a "y man1 call+ at ! home ( a "y lady1 asks to see ! ladies1 mean+ ! "m or *ap]on z well z ! p>ticul> "y lady h]self4 ,no well-mann]$ "y man asks to see only "o lady1 :5 !re are sev]al o!rs 9 ! h\se4 ,if ! ladies are out1 he may leave a suffici5t numb] ( c>ds = all ( !m1 includ+ "o = ! ho/ or he may leave "o c>d )\t explanation4 ,if ! ladies are 91 he /ill leaves a c>d = ! ho/ on ! hall table :5 he is dep>t+4 ,:5 mak+ 8 fir/ or la/ call ( ! season1 a man may leave "o c>d = ea* "o ( ! ladies & ea* "o ( ! m5 ( ! h\sehold ) :om he is acqua9t$4 ,?is holds true only :5 ! call is made on ! day at home1 or on a ,sunday aft]noon or ev5+4 ,! man :o calls on a lady's day at home1 & ^: call has no ref]5ce to any social debts or obligations1 leaves only "o c>d--& if he is an intimate fri5d ( ! h\se :]e ! call is made1 he leaves no c>ds at all4 ,m5's social calls are few4 ,bus9ess affairs require mo/ ( _! "t1 & ! duty ( c>d-leav+ is g5]ally giv5 into ! h&s ( a fem99e relative--ei!r "m1 si/] or wife4 ,m>ri$ m5 inv>iably entru/ _! =mal social duties to _! wives1 b s+le m5 mu/ n take advantage ( ?is privilege4 ,x is all v well = a "m or si/] to leave ! c>ds ( a son or bro!r :o is busy at 8 (fice on ! ho/esses ^: hospitality !y enjoy$ toge!r4 ,b :5 a "y man is ent]ta9$ by a ho/ess :o is n on 8 "m's or si/]'s visit+ li/1 x is v important = him to make 8 return calls 9 p]son4 ,?is is especially true 9 reg>d to d9n] & ball hospitalities--!y require imm$iate & cordial reciprocation 9 ! matt] ( calls & c>d-leav+4 ,,! ,,man',s ,,*ance ,,call ,unless ! ladies are 9 ! draw+-room1 ready to receive1 a man1 ^u mak+ a *ance call1 s5ds up 8 c>d or c>ds to ! p he wi%es to see4 ,if ! s]vant :o op5s ! door does n "k :e!r or n ! ladies are at home1 or if %e says t !y are at home b n d[n/airs1 ! call] places 8 c>ds on ! tray & waits 9 ! draw+-room = ! return ( ! s]vant4 ,if ! call is made aft] a ball1 d9n] or !at] p>ty1 & ! "y man is call+ on ! "y ladies ( ! h\sehold1 he s5ds up a c>d = ea* "y lady1 & also "o = ! "m or *ap]on4 ,if ! call is made = ! express purpose ( see+ "o p>ticul> "y lady1 a c>d mu/ be s5t up = h] & = h] "m or *ap]on4 ,two c>ds are also requir$ :5 a man calls ^u a m>ri$ c\ple1 9 ^: "n he has receiv$ "s hospitality4 ,he s5ds up "o c>d = ea*4 ,aft] hav+ call$ sev]al times at a c]ta9 h\se1 obvi\sly = ! purpose ( see+ a "y lady ( ! family & enjoy+ h] society1 x is no long] necess>y to include ! *ap]on 9 ! c]emony ( c>d-leav+4#b 7,see footnote47 ,"o may s5d a c>d up only to ! lady "o wi%es to see4 #b ,*ap]on be+ to-day a practically obsolete t]m1 we use x "h to signify ! p>5t or gu>dian mo/ directly conc]n$ ) ! social welf>e ( ! "y lady4 ,,ab\t ,,leav+ ,,& ,,po/+ ,,c>ds ,:5 an invalid1 eld]ly lady or woman 9 deep m\rn+ desires to repay by "s c\rtesy1 calls made ^u h] or invitations receiv$1 %e may leave c>ds at a door in/ead ( pay+ a p]sonal call1 or s5d+ !m by po/ or mess5g]4 ,a v busy ho/ess may employ ! same means ( return+ a d9n] call or fir/ call t %e owes a fri5d or acqua9tance1 especially if %e is desir\s ( ext5d+ an invitation4 ,in/ead ( leav+ ! c>d1 %e may ev51 = lack ( "t & opportunity1 po/ x ) an engrav$ or writt5 invitation4 ,a man or woman unable to accept an invitation1 ext5d$ by a ho/ess to :om he or %e is a /rang]1 is obligat$ to leave c>ds )9 two weeks aft] ! ent]ta9m5t4 ,simil>ly1 ! gue/s1 m5 & wom51 invit$ to ! c]emony ( a *ur* w$d+1 leave c>ds = ! bride's "m )9 two weeks aft] ! w$d+4 ,ev5 ?\gh "o is a /rang] to ! "m1 ?is c>d mu/ be left z a matt] ( c\rtesy & social obligation4 ,p :o receive c>ds ann\nc+ a m>riage are also expect$ to leave c>ds = ! "m ( ! bride4 ,a fri5d ( ! groom :o is a /rang] to ! bride & h] family1 & :o f9ds t he is unable to att5d ! c]emony to :i* he has be5 invit$1 ne$ n pay a call1 b mu/ leave a c>d = ! bride's "m a week or two aft] ! w$d+4 ,o!r occasions requir+ c>d-leav+ are ^? inquiries reg>d+ ! heal? & condition ( a fri5d2 sympa?y & good feel+ 9 ! ev5t ( "s mis=tune2 condol5ce2 congratulation2 & ^u ann\nc+ a prolong$ abs5ce f1 or a rentrance into1 society4 ,a *ange ( address is also usually made kn[n by means ( c>d-leav+4 ,illu/ration3 ,br[n ,bros4 ,,decorations ,,= ,a ,,w$d+ ,,9 ,a ,,small ,,*ur* ,9 a simple *ur* su* z ! "o pictur$ above ! ribbon at ! end ( ! pews may be omitt$ ,if "o is invit$ to an aft]noon or ev5+ reception1 & f9ds x impossible to att5d1 c>ds %\ld be s5t ei!r by mail or mess5g]1 s t !y rea* ! ho/ess on ! day ( h] ent]ta9m5t4 ,if ! c>ds are s5t by h& or by po/1 !y %\ld be enclos$ 9 a c>d envelope1 seal$1 & address$ to ! ho/ & ho/ess--provid$1 ( c\rse1 t bo? ( _! names appe> on ! invitation4 ,if ! affair is 9 honor ( "s special p]son a c>d is left = or s5t to t p]son 9 addition to ! "o = ! ho/ess4 ,if po/$ c>ds ( regret are s5t by a s+le woman1 %e includes "o = ! dbutante or = ! gue/ ( honor1 9 addition to ! "o enclos$ = ! ho/ess4 ,! m>ri$ woman adds to ^! two1 ?ree m ( h] husb&'s4 ,a s+le man1 "u ! same circum/ances1 s5ds ?ree ( 8 c>ds if ! reception is giv5 9 honor ( a dbutante or a gue/ ( honor 7mascul9e or fem99e71 & if ! invitation 0 issu$ 9 ! "n ( a ho/ & ho/ess4 ,"o may s5d c>ds ( inquiry1 congratulation & condol5ce by po/ or mess5g]1 only if "o is indispos$1 invalid$1 or inconv5i5tly situat$ at a great di/ance f ! p]sons address$4 ,x is always bett] =m to pay ^! calls 9 p]son1 & leave ! c>ds oneself4 ,h[ev]1 ! c>ds ( inquiry1 congratulation & condol5ce may all be ackn[l$g$ by po/ or mess5g]1 z "o desires4 ,,leav+ ,,c>ds ,,( ,,inquiry ,on "o's c>d1 ! words ,to inquire or ,may y recov] rapidly may be p5cil$ :5 a call ( inquiry reg>d+ ! heal? ( a fri5d is made4 ,dur+ a long illness1 calls by fri5ds & acqua9tances :o h be5 9 ! habit ( mak+ social calls1 %\ld be made at lea/ ?ree times a week4 ,by ^! calls1 y und]/&1 we mean m]e calls ( inquiry :5 ! c>d is left by ! door & ! pati5t is n se5 p]sonally4 ,c>d-leav+ = inquiry1 condol5ce & congratulation is inv>iably made 9 p]son4 ,be=e a fun]al1 an engrav$ c>d ) a ^w or two ( regret p5cil$ on ! "r side1 may be entru/$ to ! s]vant4 ,:5 husb&s & wives call sep>ately or toge!r1 !y leave _! own individual c>ds4 ,9 cases ( ?is k9d1 !y d n leave c>ds = ea* o!r4 ,b :5 a m>ri$ c\ple calls to (f] sympa?y = ! loss ( a daught] or son1 two ( ! husb&'s & "o ( ! wife's c>ds are left4 ,only "o c>d ea* is left = a wid[1 z = a wid[] also4 ,c>ds left = orphan$ *ildr5 are meant = ! olde/1 :o n[ repres5ts ! head ( ! family4 ,ab\t two weeks aft] a fun]al1 c>ds are left ) ! m\rn+ family1 unless a special call ( condol5ce is made4 ,9 ?is case1 ! c>ds are left j z ?\gh x 7 a social call be+ made4 ,black-bord]$ c>ds are nev] us$ except by p :o are !mselves 9 m\rn+4 ,a matron may leave c>ds = h] entire family1 & a si/] may fulfill ! duty = a busy bro!r4 ,x is nei!r complim5t>y nor g5u9ely c\rte\s to po/ a c>d to inquire aft] a fri5d or acqua9tance :o is ill4 ,x %\ld be left at ! door 9 p]son1 aft] ask+ news ( ! invalid's condition4 ,a ^w ( *e] or inquiry may be p5cil$ bel[ ! call]'s "n1 engrav$ on ! c>d4 ,calls ( inquiry1 condol5ce & ! l are made )\t ref]5ce to social indebt$ness1 b 9 all o!r cases except among intimate fri5ds1 ! conv5tion ( alt]nat+ calls %\ld be adh]$ to4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,,calls ,,( ,,inquiry ,,& ,,condol5ce ,a l>ge1 squ>e c>d 9 pla9 :ite or ) a black bord]1 inscrib$ z foll[s1 is ideal to s5d to ^? p :o call$ to (f] sympa?y & condol5ce dur+ a b]eavem5t1 po/$ two weeks aft] ! fun]al3 ,mrs4 ,rob]t ,guy ,mann]+ & ,family gratefully ackn[l$ge y\r k9d expression ( sympa?y ^u ! dea? ( _! belov$ husb& & fa!r ,rob]t ,guy ,mann]+4 ,ano!r acceptable =m frequ5tly us$ to ackn[l$ge calls ( condol5ce be=e & aft] a fun]al1 is3 ,! family ( ! late ,john ,ray ackn[l$ge ) s9c]e appreciation y\r k9d sympa?y4 ,! "n ,john ,ray may appe> on ! second l9e by itself1 or x may be "p ( ! fir/ l9e z %[n above1 entirely accord+ to ta/e or ! preval5t popul> cu/om4 ,! address ( ! b]eav$ family %\ld appe> t[>ds ! bottom ( ! c>d1 slightly to ! left4 ,x is always bett] =m to h x pr9t$ 9 italics4 ,invalids1 to express gratitude = ! c\rtesies %[n !m by fri5ds1 write or dictate notes ( ?anks imm$iately ^u becom+ well aga94 ,(t5 a popul> ho/ess w receive a va/ numb] ( solicit\s c>ds & notes ( inquiry dur+ an illness1 & x w be necess>y = h] 9 h] /ill weak5$ /ate1 to tru/ to ! mails to ?ank ! fri5ds & acqua9tances :o inquir$ = h]4 ,%e may s5d h] ord9>y visit+ c>d1 ) ! words1 ,?ank y = y\r k9d inquiries or o!rs to t effect1 writt5 across x4 ,?anks %\ld nev] be us$ in/ead ( ,?ank y4 ,its brevity c>ries a sugge/ion ( disc\rtesy4 ,,ann\ncem5t ,,c>ds ,at ! pres5t "t1 ! vogue ( s5d+ out c>ds ann\nc+ a dea? 9 ! family1 has be5 almo/ entirely discont9u$ 9 bett] society4 ,in/ead1 an ann\ncem5t is ins]t$ 9 ! newspap]s1 giv+ p>ticul>s ab\t ! dea? & also ! day ( ! fun]al4 ,x is by f> a m satisfactory me?od4 ,a typical newspap] ann\ncem5t foll[s3 ,cole4--,at ,:iteh\se1 ,n4,j41 on ,febru>y #bc1 #aiba1 ,rose ,emily1 belov$ wife ( ,rob]t ,m4 ,cole1 succumb$ to pneumonia4 ,s]vices at ,*apel1 ,albany ,rural ,cemet]y1 ,saturday1 ,febru>y #bf1 at #c ,p4,m4 ,:5 a betro?al takes place1 ann\ncem5t c>ds are sometimes s5t out1 b x is n necess>y to h specially engrav$ c>ds4 ,z a rule1 ! "m ( ! happy "y bride writes notes to intimate fri5ds & acqua9tances1 or inscribes ! news on h] visit+ c>ds & po/s !m to ^? ( h] fri5ds ) :om bo? %e & h] daught] are mo/ intimate4 ,w$d+s are usually ann\nc$ by means ( engrav$ c>ds4 ,! correct =m = ^! is giv5 else:]e4 ,engrav$ c>ds also ann\nce ! bir? ( a *ild4 ,= ?is1 "o may h a t9y :ite c>d engrav$ ) ! baby's "n1 & atta*$ to ! "m's c>d ) a n>r[ :ite sat9 ribbon4 ,x is po/$ to all fri5ds & acqua9tances4 ,9 lieu ( an address1 :i* appe>s on "m's c>d1 baby's c>d be>s ! date ( ! bir? 9 ! l[] "r-h& corn]4 ,! jo9t c>d ( ! fa!r & "m may be us$ to ann\nce ! bir? ( a *ild1 ! full "n ( ! infant be+ engrav$ 9 small lett]s above ! names ( its p>5ts4 ,! c>d ann\nc+ ! bir? ( a *ild is s5t by mail4 ,imm$iately ^u its receipt1 fri5ds & acqua9tances make calls to inquire aft] ! heal? ( "m & *ild1 & to leave c>ds = bo?4 ,:5 "o is prev5t$ f call+--& !re %\ld always be suffici5t reason = n call+--"o may respond to ! c>d ( ann\ncem5t by po/+ "o's own c>d to ! "m1 ) congratulations p5cil$ above ! "n4 ,ackn[l$gm5t ( "s k9d mu/ be made promptly4 ,,:5 ,,travel+ ,to ! man or woman :o travels1 ^? t9y bits ( bri/ol bo>d are important factors 9 keep+ him or h] 9 t\* ) ! home social life left beh9d4 ,:5 "o arrives at a /range place1 p]haps ?\s&s ( miles f a fri5d1 & "o int5ds to rema9 !re = sev]al weeks--or mon?s--"o's visit+ c>ds po/$ to all fri5ds & acqua9tances1 & be>+ "o's tempor>y address1 ties "o to home 9 a p>ticul>ly pleas+ way4 ,lett]s foll[ 9 _! wake4 ,news ( social activities rea* "o4 ,& "o beg9s to feel t aft] all1 ?is /range l& is n s di/ant6 ,& s1 if y travel1 rememb] t z soon z y rea* a place :]e y int5d to /op = a %ort :ile1 s5d out visit+ c>ds to all y\r fri5ds1 relatives & acqua9tances1 & let !m "k y\r tempor>y address4 ,x may be writt5 9 p5cil or ink above ! home address4 ,:5 y *ange y\r address p]man5tly1 be sure t all y\r fri5ds & acqua9tances "k ( ! *ange4 ,= ?is purpose1 ! old visit+ c>ds are ! be/ to use2 !y may be s5t ) a l9e drawn ?r\gh ! old address1 & ! new writt5 above x4 ,a man /opp+ at a hotel = a week or two1 & desir\s ( lett+ 8 fri5ds 9 ! vic9ity "k ( 8 :]eab\ts1 po/s 8 c>ds be>+ ! tempor>y address1 to all 8 mascul9e fri5ds1 & calls & leaves 8 c>d ^u ! wom5 he wi%es to see4 ,a woman /opp+ at a hotel or resort1 po/s h] visit+ c>ds1 ) ! tempor>y address above h] home address1 to all ^: att5tion %e wi%es to claim1--m5 & wom54 ,p4,p4,c4 ,,c>ds ,p\r pr5dre cong1 x means1 a ,fr5* expression translat$ to read1 ,to take leave4 ,& x is us$ 9 connection ) ^? la/-day visits be=e "o sails = ,europe1 or />ts on a long trip to "s di/ant place4 ,! ord9>y visit+ c>d is us$1 ) ! lett]s ,p4,p4,c4 writt5 9 p5cil or ink 9 "o corn]1 indicat+ ! dep>ture & s diff]5tiat+ x f o!r c>ds4 ,c>ds s inscrib$ are po/$ to1 or left )1 all fri5ds & acqua9tances1 a day or two be=e sett+ out on ! voyage4 ,no ackn[l$gm5t is necess>y z !y are c\rtesy-c>ds ) no relation :atev] to "o's social debts & dues4 ,p4,p4,c4 c>ds are always necess>y be=e an ext5d$ dep>ture1 b !y are p>ticul>ly s :5 "o owes calls 9 return = hospitality1 or calls 9 return = fir/ calls4 ,if !re is v little "t1 & a great _m calls to be att5d$ to1 x is entirely correct 9 ?is case to drive f h\se to h\se1 leav+ ! c>ds ) ! s]vant :o op5s ! door4 ,! c>ds may ev5 be po/$ a day be=e ! dep>ture1 if "t is v mu* limit$4 ,x is n usual = ,p4,p4,c4 c>ds to be di/ribut$ at ! end ( ! season1 :5 memb]s ( society make _! regul> *ange ( resid5ce4 ,z expla9$ "u ! head ,:5 ,travel+1 a visit+ c>d may be s5t to "o's fri5ds & acqua9tances1 be>+ ! tempor>y address above ! p]man5t home address4 ,?us ! ,p4,p4,c4 c>d w\ld n be especially necess>y4 ,,*apt] ,v ,,invitations ,,"s ,,g5]al ,,rules ,no matt] h[ in=mal1 an invitation %\ld always be ackn[l$g$ )9 a week ( its receipt4 ,x %\ld be a def9ite ackn[l$gm5t--ei!r an acceptance or refusal--& no d\bt %\ld be left z to :e!r ! writ] int5ds to be pres5t or n4 ,an invitation mu/ always be answ]$ 9 k9d2 t is1 a =mal invitation requires a =mal reply1 foll[+ closely ! word+ ( ! invitation4 ,! in=mal invitation %\ld be cordial en\gh to w>rant a cordial & fri5dly reply2 bo? invitation & ackn[l$gm5t %\ld be free ( all /ilt$ phras+4 ,=mal invitations = ev5+ affairs %\ld be address$ to husb& & wife1 omitt+ nei!r "o nor ! o!r4 7,! exception to ?is rule is ! /ag or its fem99e equival5t47 ,if !re is only "o daught] 9 ! family1 %e may be includ$ 9 ! invitation1 b :5 !re are two or m daught]s to be invit$1 a sep>ate invitation address$ to ,! ,misses ,br[n is ess5tial4 ,invitations s5t to ! mascul9e memb]s ( a family1 o!r ?an ! husb&1 are s5t individually4 ,invitations s5t to a husb& & wife are ackn[l$g$ 9 ! names ( bo?4 ,if a daught] is includ$1 h] "n is also add$ to ! ackn[l$gm5t4 ,! wife usually answ]s ! invitation1 & al?\gh x 0 s5t 9 ! "n ( ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,blank1 %e s5ds h] ackn[l$gm5t to ,mrs4 ,blank alone4 ,an invitation may nev] be ackn[l$g$ on any k9d ( a visit+ c>d1 al?\gh a visit+ c>d may be us$ 9 an invitation4 ,= v l>ge1 =mal functions1 invitations are always engrav$4 ,a "y girl does n issue invitations to m5 9 h] own "n1 b 9 t ( h] "m or gu>dian4 ,%e %\ld say 9 h] invitations t h] "m1 ,mrs4 ,blank1 desires h] to ext5d ! invitation to ,mr4 ,br[n1 etc4 ,9 reply+ to invitations1 explicit details mu/ be giv54 ,! day ( week1 date & h\r %\ld be quot$1 copy+ f ! invitation1 s t any discrepancy made 9 ! invitation w be not$ & correct$ by ! ho/ess :5 %e receives ! ackn[l$gm5t4 ,?is does away ) any possibility ( su* emb>rass+ blund]s z call+ on ! wrong day or at ! wrong h\r4 ,only ! mo/ in=mal invitation %\ld be giv5 by telephone1 by ^w ( m\? or orally by a mess5g]1 b e invitation %\ld be ei!r decl9$ c\rte\sly or accept$ ) en?usiasm promptly4 ,,invitation ,,to ,a ,,=mal ,,dance ,! ^w danc+ is usually plac$ 9 ! l[] left-h& corn] ( ! invitation to d5ote ! object ( ! ev5+'s ga!r+2 ?us no specific m5tion t ! ent]ta9m5t is to be a ball is necess>y4 ,foll[+ are ! mo/ approv$ =ms ( invitations us$ = ! v =mal balls3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,kilgore reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company on ,?ursday ev5+1 ,janu>y ! t5? at n9e o'clock ,danc+ ,sc>sdale or ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,kilgore reque/ ! pleasure ( 444444444444444444444444 company1 at a co/ume dance to be giv5 at _! home on ,?ursday1 ,janu>y ! tw5ty-six? at elev5 o' clock ,co/ume de ,rigueur #ad ,ma9 ,/reet ,! words1 ,please reply1 may be add$ al?\gh !y %\ld be unnecess>y s9ce e p]son ( good bre$+ w reply imm$iately to su* an invitation :e!r he int5ds to accept or refuse4 ,,accept+ ,,! ,,invitation ,:5 ! invitation to a dance be>s a reque/ = a reply1 a prompt answ] %\ld be s5t4 ,if ! invitation itself is 9 ! ?ird p]son1 ! reply %\ld foll[ ! same =m4 ,= a =mal ball1 an acceptance or regret %\ld be mail$ )9 =ty-eight h\rs aft] receipt ( ! invitation4 ,"h are ! correct =ms = ! invitations above3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,h>ris accept ) pleasure ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,kilgore's k9d invitation to be pres5t = danc+ on ,?ursday ev5+1 ,janu>y ! t5? at n9e o'clock #adh ,gr& ,b\lev>d ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,h>ris regret exce$+ly t !y are unable to accept ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,kilgore's k9d invitation to a co/ume dance to be giv5 at _! home4 ,brookl9e4 ,:5 ! ackn[l$gm5t is a regret1 x is n necess>y to repeat ! date & h\r = ! obvi\s reason t z long z "o is n go+1 x makes no diff]5ce :e!r or n ! details ( "t are correct4 ,,= ,,! ,,in=mal ,,dance ,:5 ! dance is a small & less =mal affair1 a %ort note is us$1 ?\gh ! m punctili\s social usage fr[ns ^u ! employm5t ( visit+ c>ds = su* purposes4 ,foll[+ is ! correct visit+ c>d = in=mal dance purposes3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h>old ,*amp ,at ,home ,danc+ at ,t5 #dcb ,maple ,/reet ,april ! ,fif? ,! ackn[l$gm5t %\ld be h&-writt5 on :ite note pap]1 & c\*$ 9 a cordial1 in=mal mann]4 ,,! ,,d9n] ,,dance ,! d9n] dance seems to be "o ( society's mo/ favor$ functions4 ,= ?is affair x is necess>y = ! ho/ess to issue two sets ( invitations2 "o set to ! p %e wi%es to ent]ta9 at d9n]1 & "o to ^? :om %e wi%es to invite = ! danc+ only4 ,! d9n] invitation w\ld be ! regul> engrav$ d9n] c>d ) ! words ,danc+ at t5 writt5 9 ! l[] left-h& corn]4 ,! dance invitations w\ld be h] regul> at-home c>ds ) ! words ,danc+ at t5 writt5 9 ! l[] left-h& corn]4 ,a v popul> me?od ( invit+ p to in=mal dance p>ties--a me?od t has won favor among ho/esses :o are fond ( invit+ j a few "y m5 & wom5 9 to dance & enjoy simple refre%m5t--is t ( us+ ! jo9t visit+ c>d ( h]self & h] husb& & writ+ 9 ! l[] left-h& corn]3 ,danc+ at elev5 ,april ! f\r? ,?is may be writt5 9 9 ink--& z an invitation ! c>d may be us$ to take ! place ( ! writt5 invitation or ! =mal ?ird-p]son note4 ,,! ,,debut ,,dance ,an ord9>y dance invitation ) ! call+ c>d ( ! dbutante includ$ may be us$ = ! occasion ( introduc+ ! db daught] to society4 ,a m /rictly =mal =m foll[s3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,*>les ,w5dov] reque/ ! pleasure ( introduc+ _! daught] ,emily ,ju/9e to 4444444444444444444444444 on ,tuesday1 ,may ! ?ird at eight o'clock #aj ,m]ril ,p>kway ,,invitations ,,= ,,! ,,subscription ,,dance ,foll[+ is ! correct invitation to use :5 ! subscription dance is held 9 ! draw+-room ( a hotel4 ,x %\ld be engrav$ 9 script ^u l>ge :ite lett] %eets3 ,! pleasure ( 444444444444444444444444444 company is reque/$ at ! ,?ird ,reunion at ! ,ri*elieu ,hotel on ,friday ev5+1 ,april ! t5? f n9e until "o o'clock4 ,patronesses ,mrs4 ,johnson ,mrs4 ,m]$i? ,mrs4 ,moo]s ,mrs4 ,?ompson ,mrs4 ,clure ,) ! invitation above1 v\*]s are inv>iably includ$4 ,^! v\*]s are = ! purpose ( enabl+ subscrib]s & patronesses to ext5d hospitalities to _! fri5ds1 b also to b> ! admittance ( ^? p :o 7 n invit$4 ,"h is ! =m usually us$ = ! v\*]3 ,?ird ,reunion ,g5tlem5's ,v\*] ,admit 4444444444444444444444444444 on ,friday ev5+1 ,april ! t5? ,complim5ts ( 4444444444444444444 ,to d away ) ! necessity ( ! v\*] a c>d l ! foll[+ is us$3 ,?ird ,reunion 44444444444444444444444444 ,! pleasure ( y\r company is reque/$ on ,tuesday1 ! t5? ( ,june at eight o'clock ,community ,club #ah ,=e/ ,av5ue ,please pres5t ?is c>d at ! door4 ,if ! invitations are issu$ & di/ribut$ by a committee or bo>d ( directors1 in/ead ( by private subscrib]s1 ! words3 ,! ,committee ( ! ,?ird ,reunion ,hilldale ,club #bcd ,k+/on ,av5ue appe> b5ea? ! engrav+1 9 ! left-h& corn]4 ,! prop] =m is to use a lett] %eet1 engrav+ ! invitation on ! out] face1 & li/+ on ! second inn] face1 ! names ( ! m5 :o are giv+ ! ball4 ,h[ev]1 x is also correct to use a l>ge bri/ol bo>d c>d1 li/+ ! ho/s on ! rev]se side1 or on ano!r simil> c>d4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,,subscription ,,dance ,,invitations ,an invitation to a subscription ball1 receiv$ 9 ! "n ( ! :ole body ( subscrib]s1 requires a prompt ackn[l$gm5t ( acceptance or d5ial to ! address giv5 on ! c>d4 ,b if a subscrib] ext5ds an invitation to a fri5d1 enclos+ ) ! invitation 8 or h] own c>d1 ! answ] is s5t to ?is subscrib] individually4 ,x is usually a %ort1 in=mal note1 some?+ l ! foll[+1 & x may be address$ to ! entire ,committee or m]ely to its ,*airman3 #ai ,we/ ,/reet1 ,april #ah1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,blake3 ,x is ) great pleasure t ,i accept y\r invitation to att5d ! ,?ird ,reunion ( ! ,hilldale ,club1 on ,friday1 ! t5? ( ,april4 ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,hel5 ,r4 ,haddock4 ,,invitation ,,to ,,public ,,ball ,public balls t require pur*as$ tickets h a v di/9ct k9d ( invitation4 ,! foll[+ invitation %\ld be pr9t$ or engrav$ on v l>ge lett] %eets or c>ds1 giv+1 ei!r on ! second inn] %eet or on ! rev]se ( ! c>d1 ! names ( ! patronesses4 ,! pleasure ( y\r company is reque/$ at ! ,annual ,masqu]ade ,ball ,to be giv5 at ! ,taft ,hotel ,?ursday ,ev5+ ,janu>y ! fif?1 at t5 o'clock ,c>ds ( admission1 ,?ree ,doll>s ,on sale at ! ,taft ,hotel & homes ( ! ,patronesses ,,reque/+ ,,an ,,invitation ,:5 "o is invit$ to an ent]ta9m5t & f9ds x impossible to att5d )\t a visit+ gue/ or relative1 an invitation may be reque/$4 ,b a great deal ( tact & good judgm5t mu/ be ex]t$4 ,a note ( reque/ foll[s1 b 9 writ+ notes = y\r own p>ticul> in/ances1 y mu/ rememb] t ea* note has to be adapt$ to ! occasion 9 h&4 #bg ,cl>emont ,t]race1 ,may #h1 #aib--4 ,my de> ,mrs4 ,jolson3 ,elsie ,mill]ton1 ^: bro!r y rememb] 0 at ,hot ,spr+s la/ ye> :5 we 71 is sp5d+ a few days ) me4 ,i wond] if ,i may br+ h] to y\r dance next ,?ursday8 ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,m>y ,b4 ,hall4 ,x is r>ely necess>y to refuse su* a reque/ z ?is2 b if ! ballroom is already too cr[d$ & if ! ho/ess has receiv$ a numb] ( simil> petitions %e may ) propriety s5d a brief note ( refusal ) a c\rte\s ^w or two ( explanation4 ,,! ,,d9n] ,,invitation ,a d9n] invitation is ! highe/ =m ( c\rtesy4 ,t is :y x requires prompt & v c\rte\s ackn[l$gm5t4 ,ord9>ily d9n] invitations are issu$ t5 days ahead1 unless x is a v l>ge =mal affair1 :5 two full weeks are all[$4 ,x is n good =m to s5d an invitation j ab\t a day or two be=e ! day set = ! d9n]-p>ty1 = !n ! gue/ w be p]fectly correct 9 feel+ t ! invitation 0 issu$ to h] 7or him7 only because "s o!r gue/ 0 unable to att5d4 ,if !re are only ?ree or f\r gue/s in=mal notes are usually s5t1 h[ev] elaborate ! d9n] itself is to be4 ,su* an invitation %\ld occupy only ! fir/ page ( a %eet ( note pap]4 ,d9n] invitations may ei!r be writt5 on ord9>y %eets ( :ite /ation]y1 or engrav$ on c>ds4 ,if ! latt] is decid$ ^u1 x mu/ be l>ge1 pure :ite1 & ( r heavy bri/ol bo>d4 ,! ho/ess :o gives _m l>ge & elaborate d9n]s may h c>ds l ! foll[+ pr9t$1 leav+ spaces = ! ins]tion ( ! "n ( ! p]son invit$1 ! day1 h\r & date3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,j]emiah ,knight reque/ ! pleasure ( 4444444444444444444 company at d9n] on 4444444444444444 ev5+ at 4444444444444444 o'clock #ee ,c\rt ,/reet ,! words ,to meet ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,/aple may be writt5 9 ink at ! bottom ( ! engrav$ c>d1 :5 ! d9n] is 9 honor ( a special gue/4 ,or small c>ds may be pr9t$ & enclos$ ) ! invitations4 ,,9 ,,honor ,,( ,,celebrat$ ,,gue/s ,(t51 to introduce someone ( di/+ui%$ position to ! ho/ess' acqua9tances & fri5ds1 a l>ge & elaborate d9n] is giv54 ,! c>ds %\ld be engrav$ 9 a f9e script or block lett]1 9 ! foll[+ word+3 ,to meet ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,mc,allister ,van ,dor5 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,k+ reque/ ! pleasure ( 44444444444444444444444 company at d9n] on ,?ursday1 ,janu>y ! six? at eight o'clock #dee ,nor? ,av5ue4 ,,! ,,ackn[l$gm5ts ,= ! =mal invitation1 writt5 9 ! ?ird p]son1 a simil> ackn[l$gm5t mu/ be s5t )9 tw5ty-f\r h\rs4 ,foll[+ are an acceptance & a regret t may s]ve z sugge/ions = ! d9n] invitations t y w accept & refuse 9 ! future3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h]b]t ,?orne accept ) pleasure ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,j]emiah ,knight's k9d invitation to d9n] on ,friday1 ,augu/ ! fif? at eight o'clock #fd ,we/ ,drive ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h]b]t ,?orne regret t a previ\s engagem5t prev5ts _! accept+ ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,j]emiah ,knight's k9d invitation to d9n] on ,friday1 ,augu/ ! fif? #fd ,we/ ,drive ,x is n necess>y to give complete details reg>d+ "t & h\r1 9 ! second ackn[l$gm5t--:i* is a regret4 ,inasmu* z "o does n expect to att5d1 x is unnecess>y to pay great att5tion to details t are important only = ^? :o expect to be gue/s4 ,9 writ+ regrets1 x is always m c\rte\s to give ! reason = be+ unable to accept1 b x is n important to d s unless "o really wi%es to4 ,,= ,,! ,,in=mal ,,d9n] ,! in=mal d9n] invitation is inv>iably s5t by ! wife = h] husb& & h]self1 to ! wife1 includ+ ! latt]'s husb&4 ,! invitation takes ! =m ( a %ort1 fri5dly little social note1 & is answ]$ z su*4 ,= in/ance1 "h is an invitation to an in=mal d9n]1 & ! ackn[l$gm5t3 #cef ,cosgrove ,av5ue1 ,novemb] #a1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,h>ris3 ,w y & ,mr4 ,h>ris give u ! pleasure ( hav+ y ) u at a small d9n] on ,?ursday1 ,novemb] ! eigh?1 at sev5 o'clock8 ,hop+ t y w be dis5gag$ t ev5+1 ,i am ,y\rs v s9c]ely1 ,m>g>et ,b4 ,le&]s4 ,y w notice t 9 sign+ h]self1 ! wife uses h] ,*ri/ian & m>ri$ "n1 & ! initial ( h] maid5 "n4 ,%e may spell h] maid5 "n out1 if %e wi%es1 b ! =m giv5 above is ! mo/ usual4 ,"h is ! correct ackn[l$gm5t to ! invitation above3 #fed ,milton ,/reet1 ,novemb] #e1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,le&]s3 ,mr4 ,h>ris & ,i w be delight$ to d9e ) y & ,mr4 ,le&]s on ,?ursday1 ,novemb] ! eigh?1 at sev5 o'clock4 ,) k9de/ reg>ds1 ,i am ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,mildr$ ,trav]s ,h>ris4 ,,:5 ,,! ,,d9n] ,,is ,,n ,,at ,,home ,x happ5s q frequ5tly t a ho/ess gives a d9n] = h] fri5ds outside ( h] own home4 ,9 ?is case1 ! fact mu/ be fully not$ on ! invitation4 ,= in/ance3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,walt] ,bruhn reque/ ! pleasure ( ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,p]ry ,blascon's company at d9n] at ,%anley's on ,w$nesday1 ,m>* ! six? at eight o'clock #da ,tompk9s ,place ,! acceptance & regret w\ld be exactly ! same z ! =ms giv5 previ\sly1 except t ! words ,at ,%anley's w\ld necess>ily h to appe>4 ,,! ,,daught] ,,z ,,ho/ess ,x is necess>y = ! daught]1 :o is ho/ess 9 h] fa!r's h\se1 to include 8 "n 9 e d9n] invitation %e issues4 ,foll[+ is a model in=mal invitation to d9n]1 issu$ by a "y daught]-ho/ess3 ,my de> ,mrs4 ,curtis3 ,fa!r has ask$ me to ext5d an invitation to y & ,mr4 ,curtis to d9e ) u on ,tuesday1 ,april ! fif?1 at half-pa/ sev5 o'clock4 ,we are look+ =w>d to y\r com+ ) a great deal ( pleasure4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,rose ,m]$i?4 ,9 ackn[l$g+ ?is invitation1 :e!r x be acceptance or regret1 ! answ] mu/ g to ! daught]1 n ! fa!r4 ,x is disc\rte\s & rude to receive a lett] or an invitation f "o p]son1 & ackn[l$ge x to ano!r4 ,,po/pon+ ,,or ,,cancel+ ,a ,,d9n] ,:5 x happ5s 7& x (t5 does67 t some?+ un=ese5 & unexpect$ happ5s to prev5t "o f giv+ ! d9n] = :i* engrav$ c>ds h be5 issu$1 ! ho/ess mu/ imm$iately dispat*1 ei!r ?r\gh mess5g] or special deliv]y1 %ort writt5 notes cancel+ ! engagem5t4 ,! ?ird-p]son =mula may be us$1 b !re mu/ be a c]ta9 w>m? 9 ! note to avoid any semblance ( indiff]5ce4 ,& x is a m>k ( f9e c\rtesy to (f] ! reason :y ! d9n] has to be po/pon$4 ,"h are two =ms t may be us$3 ,because ( ! sev]e illness ( _! son ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,smi? beg to cancel _! d9n]1 arrang$ = ,tuesday1 ,may ! fif? or ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,smi? regret t ! damages done to _! home by a rec5t fire make x necess>y = !m to po/pone ! d9n] arrang$ = ,may ! fif? until ,may ! ?irtie?4 ,,invit+ ,a ,,/op-,,gap ,:5 a vacancy occurs 9 a d9n] p>ty at ! la/ mom5t1 "o may call ^u a fri5d to fill ! place z a special c\rtesy4 ,?is is an in/ance :5 tact & discretion are important1 = n ev]yone is broad-m9d$ & s5sible1 & "s p may take (f5se at be+ ask$ to take ! place t someone else rel9qui%$4 ,a %ort cordial note %\ld be writt51 expla9+ ! situation1 & frankly ask+ ! fri5d to come 9 ! place ( ! invit$ gue/ :o _c be pres5t4 ,"h1 = in/ance1 is a typical note = j su* a purpose3 #da ,hem+way ,place1 ,m>* #ad1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mr4 ,cook3 ,i am go+ to ask a v special favor ( y1 & ,i "k t y w be good en\gh to comply--if no o!r engagem5t /&s 9 ! way4 ,ralph ,t[n%5d1 :o 0 to h be5 pres5t at a little d9n] p>ty t ,i am giv+ to-morr[ ev5+1 has j writt5 t he has be5 call$ out ( t[n on bus9ess4 ,won't y be good en\gh to take 8 place & give me m reason ?an ev] = subscrib+ myself ,gratefully y\rs1 ,janet ,b4 ,ra9es4 ,9 answ]+ ?is lett]1 ,mr4 ,cook mu/ ei!r accept or decl9e def9itely4 ,to be c\rte\s1 he mu/ give a reason = decl9+4 ,to write m]ely & say t "o _c s]ve z a /op-gap is bo? impolite & inconsid]ate4 ,ei!r a good reason or an acceptance mu/ be giv54 ,"h is ! way ! acceptance may be word$3 #adfe ,emmet ,road1 ,m>* #af1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,ra9es3 ,i'm r glad t ,ralph 0 call$ out ( t[n1 s9ce x gives me an opportunity to be pres5t at ano!r ( y\r delightful d9n]s4 ,?ank y v mu* = ! invitation4 ,y\rs v s9c]ely1 ,ralph ,b4 ,cook4 ,,to ,,break ,a ,,d9n] ,,engagem5t ,!re is no reason to feel emb>rass$ & unhappy because "s unexpect$ happ5+ prev5ts y f keep+ a d9n] engagem5t4 ,a cordial note1 conta9+ a g5u9e & wor?-:ile excuse = ! cancellation ( ! engagem5t may be s5t by mess5g]1 or if !re is "t1 by special deliv]y po/1 to ! ho/ess4 ,"h is an example ( ! k9d ( note t may be writt5 to break a d9n] engagem5t3 #aef ,s\? ,b5d1 ,m>* #ah1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,*ri/y3 ,mr4 ,cross has be5 call$ to ,*icago on acc\nt ( ! illness ( 8 "m4 ,we are v anxi\s ab\t h]1 & ,i am sure y w und]/& :y x is impossible = ei!r ( u to att5d y\r d9n] p>ty next ,friday4 ,) _m regrets1 ,i am ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,flor5ce ,b>tlett ,pitk94 ,,invitations ,,= ,,lun*eons ,al?\gh consid]ably less =mal ?an d9n] invitations1 ^? ( ! lun*eon foll[ !m 9 word+4 ,!y are issu$ ab\t t5 days be=e ! day set = ! lun*eon1 if x is to be an elaborate1 =mal affair1 & only 9 ! "n ( ! ho/ess1 unless m5 are invit$ & ! ho/ess' husb& int5ds to be pres5t4 ,!y are engrav$ on l>ge squ>e :ite c>ds1 ) ! "n ( ! p]son invit$1 ! day & h\r1 writt5 9 by ! ho/ess' own h&4 ,! correct =m foll[s1 b x mu/ be rememb]$ t ?is =m c be us$ only :5 ! lun*eon is an elaborate1 =mal occasion3 ,mrs4 ,john ,roy-,?orndyke ,blake reque/s ! pleasure ( 44444444444444444444444 company at lun*eon on 44444444444444444444 at 44444444444444444 o'clock #aa ,p>k ,r[ ,v (t5 a ho/ess invites fri5ds & acqua9tances to a lun*eon = ! purpose ( pres5t+ to !m a c]ta9 visit+ gue/1 & p]haps to att5d1 aft] ! lun*eon1 a mat9e plann$ = ! purpose ( enabl+ ! newcom] to become bett] acqua9t$ ) ! ho/ess' fri5ds4 ,9 ?is case1 an invitation l ! "o foll[+ %\ld be us$3 ,to meet ,miss ,hel5 ,rhodes ,mrs4 ,rob]t ,blake reque/s ! pleasure ( ,miss ,joyce's company at lun*eon on ,tuesday1 ,april ! elev5? at "o o'clock & aft]w>d to ! mat9e #afg ,gr& ,conc\rse ,! "n ( ! play & ! !at] may be includ$ 9 ! word+ ( ! invitation4 ,breakfa/ invitations are r>ely issu$1 = ! v good reason t =mal breakfa/s are v r>ely giv54 ,b :5 !y are1 ! word+ ( ! invitation is id5tical ) ! word+ giv5 above = ! lun*eon invitations1 sub/itut+ 9 ea* case ! ^w breakfa/ = lun*eon4 ,ackn[l$gm5ts are also ! same z ^? us$ = ! lun*eon4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,,! ,,lun*eon ,,invitation ,a prompt acceptance or regret mu/ be s5t ^u receipt ( an invitation to lun*eon4 ,! foll[+ two =ms are correct = use ) ! two invitations giv5 above4 ,mrs4 ,frank ,p>sons accepts ) pleasure ,mrs4 ,john ,clancy ,blake's k9d invitation to lun*eon on ,friday1 ,octob] ! f\rte5? at "o o'clock #adf ,p>k ,place ,miss ,jean ,joyce accepts ) pleasure ,mrs4 ,blake's k9d invitation = lun*eon on ,tuesday1 ,april ! elev5? at "o o'clock to meet ,miss ,rhodes & to g aft]w>d to ! mat9e #dh ,fremont ,av5ue ,,! ,,in=mal ,,invitation ,= ! in=mal lun*eon1 a brief note ( invitation is s5t f five to sev5 days ahead4 ,9 mak+ ! note brief1 "o mu/ be c>eful n to sacrifice cordiality4 ,we give "h two notes ( invitation1 "o = lun*eon & "o = breakfa/2 & also _! respective ackn[l$gm5ts3 #hf ,wa%+ton ,t]race1 ,april #ad1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,blank3 ,w y come to lun*eon on ,w$nesday ,april ! tw5tie?1 at half-pa/ "o o'clock8 ,mrs4 ,frank ,ri*>ds w be "h1 & ,i "k y w be glad to meet h]4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,hel5 ,r4 ,rob]ts4 #fd ,ma9 ,/reet1 ,april #af1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,rob]ts3 ,i w be v glad to come to lun*eon on ,w$nesday1 ,april ! tw5tie?1 at half-pa/ "o o'clock4 ,x 0 v k9d ( y to rememb] t ,i h be5 want+ to meet ,mrs4 ,ri*>ds = a long "t4 ,y\rs v s9c]ely1 ,ju/9e ,blank4 #dcg ,fairview ,t]race1 ,may #e1 #ai-- ,de> ,mrs4 ,mill]3 ,i expect a few fri5ds to jo9 me at an in=mal breakfa/ at half-pa/ elev5 o'clock on ,tuesday1 ! t5?4 ,won't y be "o ( !m8 ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,maybelle ,curtis4 #hbb ,j5n+s ,/reet1 ,may #g1 #ai-- ,de> ,mrs4 ,curtis3 ,?ank y v mu* = ask+ me1 b ,i regret t ,i w n be able to jo9 y at breakfa/ on ,tuesday4 ,i h two "y nieces /opp+ ) me1 & ,i promis$ to devote t morn+ to %[+ !m ! places ( int]e/ 9 t[n4 ,!y are plann+ s eag]ly = ! trip1 & !y are leav+ "h 9 su* a %ort "t1 t ,i feel t ,i mu/ n disappo9t !m4 ,) mo/ s9c]e regrets1 ,i am ,cordially y\rs1 ,m>y ,k4 ,mill]4 ,!re is /ill ano!r approv$ =m = invit+ gue/s to lun*eon or breakfa/4 ,:5 ! occasion is nei!r too /rictly =mal nor too in=mal1 ! ho/ess may m]ely write1 b5ea? ! engrav$ "n on h] ord9>y call+ c>d1 ! words1 ,lun*eon at "o-?irty o'clock ,m>* f\r?4 ,?is is s5t ab\t five days be=e ! *os5 day4 ,! ackn[l$gm5t mu/ be by in=mal note1 nev] by a call+ c>d4 ,& ?is holds true ( all o!r invitations2 :5 ! p]sonally inscrib$ call+ c>d is us$1 a fir/-p]son note ( acceptance or regret mu/ be promptly writt54 ,! use ( c>ds 9 ?is way is look$ ^u ) disfavor among p :o are mo/ c>eful ( ! am5ities ( polite society4 ,,reception ,,invitation ,! ^w reception may mean sev]al social functions :i* may or may n be extremely c]emoni\s4 ,!re is ! aft]noon tea1 = in/ance1 an in=mal little affair to :i* "o invites "o's be/ fri5ds & mo/ int]e/+ acqua9tances4 ,! invitation may be ei!r writt5 by ! ho/ess or engrav$4 ,! at-home day is also call$ a reception1 z is ! m elaborate occasion :5 a special gue/ is introduc$ to ! ho/ess' fri5ds4 ,!re 0 a "t :5 x 0 consid]$ extremely bad =m = a ho/'s "n to appe> on ! invitation1 b to-day ! reception invitation (t5 takes ! =m ( ! foll[+3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,h>old ,bla9e ,at ,home ,tuesday aft]noon1 ,may fif? f f\r until half-pa/ sev5 o'clock ,twelve1 ,p>k ,t]race ,! above invitation %\ld be engrav$ 9 f9e script on a l>ge :ite c>d ( bri/ol bo>d1 & x %\ld be mail$ at lea/ t5 days 9 advance ( ! day set = ! ent]ta9m5t4 ,an ackn[l$gm5t is n expect$2 if ! invitation is accept$1 ! pres5ce ( ! gue/ on ! day ( ! reception is suffici5t4 ,if "o is unable to be pres5t1 "o's visit+ c>d is s5t to arrive on ! exact day ( ! reception--unless an answ] is explicitly requir$ on ! invitation4 ,n to be pres5t at ! reception1 & n to s5d "o's visit+ c>d1 is to indicate ei!r t "o is ignorant ( ! correct social laws1 or t "o desires to discont9ue fri5d%ip ) ! ho/ess4 ,:5 a "m & h] daught] are to receive ! gue/s at a reception toge!r1 ! c>d is 9 ?is =m3 ,mrs4 ,william ,b4 ,h>ris ,! ,misses ,h>ris ,at ,home ,friday ,aft]noon1 ,octob] fif? f f\r until sev5 o'clock ,?irty-two ,am/]dam ,av5ue ,if ! reception is = ! purpose ( introduc+ a "y dbutante daught]1 ! ho/ess w\ld issue c>ds simil> to ! "o above1 except t ! dbutante's "n w\ld appe> imm$iately bel[ h] own4 ,x w\ld be m]ely ,miss ,h>ris ) no ,*ri/ian "n or initial4 ,if a second daught] is introduc$ to h] "m's fri5ds by means ( an aft]noon tea1 ! c>ds are also l ! "o above1 except t ! "n ( ! second daught] is inscrib$ 9 full b5ea? t ( ! ho/ess4 ,?us invit$ gue/s w\ld "k t ,miss ,h>ris is ! eld] & introduc$ to society fir/1 & ,miss ,m]ian ,h>ris is ! second daught] to be introduc$ to society4 ,,reception ,,9 ,,honor ,,( ,a ,,special ,,gue/ ,:5 ! purpose ( ! reception is to honor a special gue/ ! fact %\ld be indicat$ on ! invitations4 ,if ! invitation is writt5 on a c>d1 ! words1 ,to meet ,gov]nor & ,mrs4 ,frank ,curtis %\ld appe>4 ,! prop] =m = ! engrav$ invitation foll[s3 ,to meet ,gov]nor & ,mrs4 ,frank ,curtis ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,james ,melv9 reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company on ,?ursday aft]noon1 ,june fif? f f\r until sev5 o'clock ,eighte51 ,wa%+ton ,g>d5 ,heights ,no ackn[l$gm5t o!r ?an "o's pres5ce on ! day ( ! reception is necess>y to ?is invitation4 ,h[ev]1 if "o is unable to att5d1 ! visit+ c>d %\ld be mail$ s t x arrives on ! precise day ( ! ent]ta9m5t1 or if an unexpect$ happ5+ prev5ts "o f att5d+1 a mess5g] may be dispat*$ ) a c>d 9 an envelope1 =w>d+ x to ! ho/ess :ile ! reception is 9 progress4 ,,invitations ,,to ,,g>d5 ,,p>ties ,:5 ! g>d5 p>ty is v =mal1 ! invitations are engrav$ 9 black script or block lett]+1 on :ite note %eets or l>ge :ite c>ds4 ,! invitation is usually issu$ 9 ! "n ( ! ho/ess alone1 & ! mo/ fa%ionable /ation]s are to-day pr9t+ c>ds t leave a blank space = ! "n ( ! p]son to be invit$ to be writt5 9 by ! ho/ess4 ,= in/ance3 ,mrs4 ,maurice ,bronson reque/s ! pleasure ( 444444444444444444444444 company on ,friday aft]noon ,may t5? f f\r until sev5 o'clock ,g>d5 ,p>ty ,holyoke1 ,we/ ,lake ,9 society1 ! =mal g>d5 p>ty holds ! place ( an at-home held out ( doors4 ,?us ! foll[+ invitation is consid]$ ! be/ =m1 bett] ev5 ?an ! =m %[n above1 al?\gh ei!r may be us$ 9 good ta/e3 ,mrs4 ,maurice ,bronson ,at ,home ,friday aft]noon1 ,may t5? f f\r until sev5 o'clock ,g>d5 ,p>ty ,holyoke1 ,we/ ,lake ,:5 ! g>d5 p>ty is a small in=mal affair1 ! at-home c>d may be us$ ) ! words1 ,g>d5 ,p>ty1 ,friday1 ,may ! t5?1 f f\r to sev5 o'clock1 writt5 by ! ho/ess 9 ! l[] left-h& corn]4 ,?is me?od is usually = p]sonal fri5ds only1 & x is consid]$ bad =m :5 ! g>d5 p>ty is elaborate & =mal4 ,if ! gue/ invit$ lives 9 ano!r t[n1 or mu/ come f ! city to ! c\ntry1 a small c>d be>+ ! necess>y tra9 & s*$ule in=mation %\ld be enclos$ ) ! invitation1 simil> to ! c>d expla9$ 9 ! *apt] on w$d+ invitations4 ,or ! in=mation may be lett]$ neatly at ! bottom ( ! invitation itself4 ,! =m is usually3 ,tra9 leaves ,p5nsylvania ,/ation at #c o'clock ,tra9 leaves ,holyoke ,/ation at #f4bj & #g4aj o'clock ,/ill ano!r c\rse is op5 to ! ho/ess :o wi%es to give a small g>d5 p>ty1 yet n und]go ! exp5se & tr\ble ( specially engrav$ invitations4 ,%e may write brief1 fri5dly notes1 9 ! fir/ p]son1 some:at 9 ! foll[+ =m1 & s5d !m by po/ to h] fri5ds & acqua9tances3 ,holyoke1 ,may #a1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,ke5e3 ,i h ask$ a few ( my fri5ds to h tea ) me1 in=mally1 on ! lawn1 ,friday aft]noon1 ,may ! t5?1 at f\r o'clock4 ,may ,i expect y also8 ,p]haps !re w be a few sets ( t5nis4 ,!re is a racquet wait+ = y4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,rose ,m4 ,rob]ts4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,,! ,,g>d5 ,,p>ty ,,invitation ,:e!r ! g>d5 p>ty invitation be>s a reque/ = a reply or n1 ! c\rte\s ?+ to d is s5d an acceptance or regret at once4 ,?is is especially true :5 ! invitation is engrav$1 = !n "o may assume t ! affair is to be a l>ge & elaborate "o4 ,! reply to an engrav$ invitation foll[s3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,raymond ,bruce accept ) pleasure ,mrs4 ,bronson's k9d invitation = ,may t5? ,haywood ,p>k1 ,may second1 #ai-- or ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,raymond ,bruce regret t a previ\s engagem5t prev5ts _! acceptance ( ,mrs4 ,bronson's k9d invitation = ,may t5? ,haywood ,p>k1 ,may second1 #ai-- ,9 reply to a visit+ c>d inscrib$ ) ! day & date ( ! g>d5 p>ty1 a brief1 polite note ( acceptance or regret %\ld be writt54 ,a simil> note %\ld be promptly writt5 ^u receipt ( ! in=mal writt5 note ( invitation4 ,gl5dale1 ,may #b1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,bronson3 ,mr4 ,h>ris & ,i are look+ =w>d ) great pleasure 9 jo9+ y on ,may t5?4 ,we hope ! wea!r w cont9ue to be z delightful z x is n[4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,janet ,b4 ,w9sl[4 ,,h\se ,,or ,,week-,,end ,,p>ties ,! invitation = a h\se or week-end p>ty diff]s f any o!r invitation4 ,by ! week-end p>ty we mean a visit f ,friday or ,saturday until ,monday4 ,?us ! invit$ gue/ kn[s t he is expect$ to arrive ,friday aft]noon 7or ,saturday morn+7 & leave ,monday morn+4 ,on ! o!r h&1 ! h\se p>ty may mean a visit ( t5 days or two weeks' duration1 or ev5 long]4 ,x is necess>y1 !re=e1 = ! ho/ess to m5tion specifically ! date decid+ ! l5g? ( ! visit4 ,x is also c\rte\s = h] to m5tion ! sports t w be indulg$ 9 & any special ev5ts plann$1 etc41 & to s5d ! necess>y "t-tables1 indicat+ ! be/ & mo/ conv5i5t tra9s4 ,:e!r = h\se p>ty or week-end p>ty1 ! invitation is always a well-word$1 cordial note (f]+ ! hospitalities ( "o's ro( = ! l5g? ( "t indicat$4 ,we w give "h "o lett] ( invitation & its ackn[l$gm5t1 :i* c be1 p]haps1 adapt$ to y\r own purposes4 ,p9e ,rock1 ,june #ad1 #ai-- ,de> ,miss ,janis3 ,we h plann$ a h\se p>ty z a sort ( f>ewell be=e our trip to ,europe1 & we are p>ticul>ly anxi\s to h y jo9 u4 ,i hope !re is no?+ to prev5t y f com+ out to ,p9e ,rock on ,june tw5ty-?ird & rema9+ "h ) u until ! eigh? ( ,july4 ,i hope to h _m ( y\r own fri5ds ) u1 includ+ ,jean & ,m>ie ,cord9e1 :o are also plann+ to sail t[>ds ! end ( ,july4 ,mr4 ,frank ,p>sons & ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,rob]t ,k+sley may be "h1 too1 along ) sev]al o!rs :om y d n "k1 b :om ,i am mo/ anxi\s to h y meet4 ,i am enclos+ a "t-table = y\r conv5i5ce1 & ,i h *eck$ ! two tra9s t ,i believe are mo/ conv5i5t = y4 ,if y take ! #c4eh on ,tuesday y w arrive "h at #g4aj1 & y w be able to meet ! gue/s at d9n] at eight-?irty4 ,!re is an e>li] tra9 9 ! morn+ if y pref] x4 ,if y let me "k :i* tra9 y expect to take1 ,i w see t !re is a c> at ! /ation to meet y4 ,v cordially y\rs1 ,alice ,m4 ,bevans4 ,we/ville1 ,june #af1 #ai-- ,de> ,mrs4 ,bevans3 ,x 0 v good ( y & ,mr4 ,bevans to ask me to y\r h\se p>ty & ,i %all be delight$ to come4 ,i %all arrive on ! #c4eh tra91 z y sugge/4 ,x 0 s ?\ghtful ( y to inclose ! "t-table4 ,v s9c]ely y\rs1 ,hel5 ,r4 ,janis4 ,if ! lett] 7 "o ( regret1 x w\ld be necess>y = ,miss ,janis to write def9itely j :at 0 mak+ x impossible = h] to accept ! invitation4 ,x w\ld n be correct =m to write vaguely1 say+ t y hope y w be able to come1 or t if y are 9 t[n y w come4 ,no d\bt mu/ be left 9 ! ho/ess' m9d z to :e!r or n y w be pres5t4 ,,! ,,bread-,,&-,,butt] ,,lett] ,f con/ant usage1 ! t]m bread-&-butt] lett] has become cu/om4 ,n[1 ^u return f a week-end or h\se p>ty1 x is consid]$ necess>y &1 inde$1 x w\ld be a gross neglect to fail 9 s obvi\s a duty1 to write a cordial note to ! ho/ess1 express+ appreciation ( ! hospitality receiv$1 & in=m+ h] ( y\r safe arrival4 ,! lett] may be z long & *atty z "o pleases1 or x may be only a brief note su* z ! foll[+3 ,t]race ,reva91 ,june #bc1 #ai-- ,de> ,mrs4 ,bevans3 ,?is is to tell y aga9 h[ v mu* ,i enjoy$ ! week-end at ,p9e ,rock4 ,we got into ! city at five & ,morgan br\ght me out home 9 a taxi4 ,"m is giv+ a small bridge ?is aft]noon & s ,i f\nd ev]yone busy1 = :ile !re is n a great deal to d x is impossible to get anyone to help d x4 ,tell ,mr4 ,bevans t ,i am arrang+ = ?ree or f\r t5nis games next week1 s t :5 ,i come aga91 if ,i don't w91 ,i %all at lea/ n be beat5 q s %amefully4 ,let me "k :5 y come to t[n on y\r next %opp+ trip4 ,p]haps we c arrange = lun* toge!r some:]e4 ,v s9c]ely y\rs1 ,hel5 ,r4 ,janis4 ,,invitations ,,to ,,! ,,!at] ,,& ,,op]a ,! ho/ or ho/ess plann+ a !at] or op]a p>ty %\ld /rive to h an equal numb] ( m5 & wom5 gue/s4 ,= ?is reason1 ! p]son :o receives an invitation %\ld make prompt reply1 s t if he or %e is unable to att5d1 someone else c be ask$ to take ! place4 ,x is n necess>y to h invitations engrav$ = ^! occasions2 9 fact1 a brief note1 writt5 ) j ! correct degree ( =mality1 yet ) no sacrifice ( cordiality1 is mu* to be pref]r$4 ,! foll[+ =m is correct = !at] or op]a1 *ang$ to accord ) ! names1 dates1 & circum/ances ( ! p>ticul> p>ty3 #bb ,s\? ,/reet1 ,octob] #ac1 #ai-- ,my de> ,miss ,johnson3 ,mr4 ,rob]ts & ,i h plann$ to h a small gr\p ( fri5ds he> ,fau/ at ! ,c5tral ,op]a ,h\se1 & we are hop+ t y w be "o ( u4 ,! "t is ,friday ev5+1 ! sev5te5? ( ,octob]4 ,i h be5 =tunate en\gh to obta9 a box 9 ! p>quet1 :]e ! eight ( u :o w comprise ! p>ty w be com=tably seat$4 ,if y are free to jo9 u on t ev5+1 ,mr4 ,rob]ts & ,i w /op = y 9 ! c> at half pa/ sev54 ,cordially y\rs1 ,evelyn ,t4 ,rob]ts4 ,! ackn[l$gm5t mu/ be made promptly4 ,! ho/ & ho/ess mu/ n be kept wait+ = a def9ite reply4 ,,invitations ,,to ,,musicales ,,& ,,private ,,!atricals ,a c]emoni\s draw+-room conc]t requires engrav$ invitations1 issu$ at lea/ two weeks 9 advance ( ! date decid$ ^u4 ,! two approv$ =ms foll[3 ,mrs4 ,john ,m4 ,cook ,at ,home ,tuesday ev5+1 ,octob] fir/ at n9e o'clock ,t51 ,f>nhut ,t]race ,music or ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,m4 ,cook reque/ ! pleasure ( 44444444444444444444444's company at a musicale on ,tuesday ev5+ ! fir/ ( ,octob] at n9e o'clock ,t51 ,f>nhut ,t]race ,x is also p]missible = ! ho/ess to write 9 ! l[] left-h& corn] ( h] visit+-c>d ! foll[+ words1 :5 %e wi%es to invite fri5ds to he> a fam\s soloi/ or or*e/ra3 ,tuesday1 ,octob] fir/1 half pa/ ?ree o'clock1 to he> ,mis*a ,elman4 ,^! c>ds are !n po/$ to fri5ds & acqua9tances1 & ! recipi5t ei!r accepts by att5d+1 or s5ds 8 or h] c>ds to ! ho/ess' h\se :ile ! ent]ta9m5t is 9 progress1 or %ortly be=eh&4 ,= private !atricals1 invitations foll[ v mu* ! same =m z ^? us$ = musicales4 ,! ho/ess may ei!r add ! phrase1 ,!atricals at n9e o'clock1 to h] invitation1 or %e may issue engrav$ c>ds reque/+ ! pleasure ( a fri5d's company at ,private ,!atricals4 ,! ^w danc+ may be engrav$ 9 ! left-h& corn] ( ! c>d1 if danc+ is to foll[ ! !atricals4 ,x is c\rte\s to s5d a reply to ^! invitations4 ,,*ildr5',s ,,p>ty ,,invitations ,! invitation to ! *ild's p>ty is ! "o exception to ! rule ( simplicity4 ,*ildr5 love color & decoration1 & s etiquette v graci\sly p]mits !m to h c>ds & invitations t boa/ colorful designs4 ,= in/ance1 9 a well-kn[n /ation]'s %op 9 ,new ,york1 !re are little %eets ( p9k note pap]1 9 ! upp] corn] ( :i* is a little girl c\rtesy+ & smil+4 ,b5ea? ! picture ! words ,won't y please come to my p>ty8 are pr9t$ 9 f9e italics4 ,x makes mo/ attractive /ation]y = ! y\ng/]s4 ,on /ation]y l t describ$ above1 "m might write 9 ! foll[+ /ra91 provid+ ! little ho/ 7or ho/ess7 is n old en\gh to d ! writ+ himself3 #af ,blake ,hall1 ,june #ad1 #ai-- ,my de> ,mrs4 ,blank3 ,h>old w be sev5 ye>s old on ,?ursday1 ! eighte5? ( ,june4 ,we are plann+ to give a little p>ty = 8 fri5ds on ! ,sunday foll[+1 ,june ! tw5ty-fir/4 ,i "k he w n be happy unless little ,m>ian is pres5t4 ,i d hope y w let h] come4 ,if ! nurse br+s ,m>ian "h at ?ree o'clock1 %e w be 9 "t = ! op5+ game1 & ,i w see t %e arrives home safely at ab\t half pa/ six4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,hel5 ,m4 ,rob]ts4 ,a fri5dly note ( acceptance or regret %\ld be writt5 promptly ^u receipt ( ! above1 & if ! *ild is unable to att5d1 ! reason %\ld be giv54 ,v (t51 a "y ho/ or ho/ess has a v l>ge & =mal p>ty1 9 :i* case ! invitations mu/ be q z dignifi$ & =mally correct z "m's4 ,= in/ance1 ! y\ng/]s :o ent]ta9 _! fri5ds at a small aft]noon dance ^w _! invitations 9 ! foll[+ mann]3 ,miss ,jean & ,ma/] ,walt] ,curran w\ld l to h ! pleasure ( ,miss ,hel5 ,?ompson's company at a dance at #c o'clock ,?ursday aft]noon1 ,novemb] ?ird ,clov] ,hall ,a "y boy or girl j old en\gh to write 8 or h] own invitations1 may f9d "s useful sugge/ions 9 ! foll[+ model = a bir?day p>ty3 ,hanov] ,c\rt1 ,octob] #f1 #ai-- ,de> ,elizabe?3 ,i am go+ to h a bir?day p>ty on ,saturday aft]noon1 ! ?irte5? ( ,octob]1 at #c o'clock4 ,all ( our fri5ds f danc+ s*ool & a good _m ( ,jack's fri5ds f 8 s*ool w be "h4 ,we are plann+ a donkey game1 & ,i am sure we w all h a great deal ( fun4 ,won't y come1 too8 ,i %all be v disappo9t$ if y _c4 ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,hel5 ,camd54 ,x is always wise1 h[ev]1 = ! *ildr5 to make "s sort ( ackn[l$gm5t ( ! =mal engrav$ invitation1 = x impresses ^u !m ! importance ( _! social duties4 ,,invitations ,,to ,a ,,*ri/5+ ,x is n usual = _m gue/s to be invit$ to ! *ri/5+ ( a *ild4 ,b :5 x is made an occasion ( =mal ent]ta9m5t1 x is necess>y to h engrav$ c>ds prep>$ & issu$ to fri5ds & relatives4 ,"h is ! correct =m3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,b4 ,m]$i? reque/ ! pleasure ( y\r company at ! *ri/5+ ( _! son on ,tuesday1 ,april second at ?ree-?irty o'clock ,t51 ,j]ome ,av5ue ,! lett] reque/+ a relative or fri5d to s]ve z godfa!r or godmo!r mu/ be tactful & well-word$4 ,x is usually v intimate1 = no "o ) f9e s5sibility w ask any except a de> fri5d to act z godmo!r or godfa!r4 ,su* a reque/ is mu* bett] giv5 9 p]son ?an by lett]1 :5ev] x is possible4 ,& x requires an answ] 9 k9d4 ,we give "h "o brief lett] ( reque/1 & ano!r ( ackn[l$gm5t1 to s]ve z sugge/ions3 #cd ,k9/on ,road1 ,m>* #e1 #ai-- ,de> ,mr4 ,burke3 ,jack & ,i h bo? agre$ t we w\ld r h y s]ve z godfa!r = ,john ,paxton1 ,jr41 ?an anyone else4 ,we hope t y w n refuse4 ,! baptism has already be5 arrang$ = f\r o'clock1 next ,sunday1 at ,/4 ,pet]'s ,*ur*4 ,we hope y w be pres5t at ! *ur*1 & lat] at a small reception "h 9 our draw+-room4 ,) k9de/ reg>ds f u bo?1 ,i am ,cordially y\rs1 ,amelia ,b4 ,johnson4 #ah ,woodlawn ,hills1 ,m>* #g1 #ai-- ,de> ,mrs4 ,johnson3 ,x w give me great pleasure to be godfa!r = y\r son4 ,truly1 ,i c\nt x no small honor1 & no slight responsibility4 ,i am v eag] to see "y ,john ,paxton1 & %all be pres5t bo? at ! *ri/5+ & at ! reception4 ,) e good wi% = him & = 8 fa!r & "m1 ,i am ,s9c]ely y\rs1 ,william ,a4 ,burke4 ,a ,,^w ,,( ,,special ,,caution ,9 answ]+ an invitation nev] say w accept4 ,! act ( writ+ ! answ] involves ei!r ! acceptance or ! regret1 z ! case may be1 & ! pres5t t5se %\ld be us$4 ,,*apt] ,,vi ,,correspond5ce ,,to-,,day ,,& ,,ye/]day ,x is cu/om>y n[adays to deplore ! fact t ! art ( lett]-writ+ has fall5 into decay1 & :5 we read t ! entire correspond5ce ( an engag$ c\ple rec5tly 0 c>ri$ on = two ye>s by telephone & telegraph we are incl9$ to believe x4 ,yet su* is n ! case4 ,x is true t we no long] h--& = ?is we %\ld be truly grateful--fl[]y expressions ( rhetorical feel+ int]l>d$ ) poetic s5tim5ts select$ f a ,home ,book ( ,v]se1 or "s simil> compilation1 b we d h lett]s :i* are g5u9e & :olesome expressions ( fri5d%ip4 ,x is a gift to be able to write lovely notes ( congratulation1 sympa?y & appreciation1 & "o t has to be cultivat$4 ,writ+ ( all k9ds gr[s p]fect ) practice & ! l>ge majority ( p h to s]ve a long appr5tice%ip be=e !y h ma/]$ ! g5tle art ( express+ !mselves on pap]4 ,x is an art wor? ma/]+ ev5 if "o nev] has to write any?+ b polite social notes & lett]s4 ,,! ,,lett] ,,y ,,write ,f ,buck+ham we h ! foll[+ little rhyme t does full ju/ice to ! important art ( lett]-writ+3 ,( all ^? arts 9 :i* ! wise excel1 ,nature's *ief ma/]piece is writ+ well4 ,a lett]1 bus9ess or social1 is simply talk ^u pap]4 ,& z a wise philosoph] once said1 ,nev] put on pap] :at y w\ld n c>e to see pr9t$ 9 ! newspap] = all to read4 ,z 9 ev]y?+ else connect$ ) ! social _w1 ease is absolutely ess5tial to ! correct lett]4 ,! /yle mu/ n be cramp$1 /ilt$1 =c$4 ,a free & easy fl[ ( language1 simple & und]/&able1 & ) j t acceptable degree ( cordiality & he>t9ess t makes "o enjoy read+1 is ess5tial 9 all correspond5ce4 ,& yet1 lett]s %\ld be writt5 p]sonally--t is1 !y %\ld repres5t ! s5d]4 ,be sure1 fir/1 t y "k exactly :at y want to say1 & h[ y want to say x4 ,!n put x d[n on pap] z ?\gh y 7 speak+2 make no pret5se at be+ s v highly educat$ t y mu/ use fl[]y language & poetical phrases4 ,simplicity 9 =m & word+ is ! mo/ effective & graceful me?od4 ,x is a great] m>k ( le>n+ & intellig5ce to write a simple1 ably express$1 cordial lett]1 ?an to write "o t %[s an obvi\s ef=t to cov]1 by extravagant expressions & highly figurative language1 ! res]ve & dignity t are ! f\ndation ( all good-bre$+4 ,9 ! foll[+ pages x is possible = u only to give ! prescrib$ pr9ciples ( correct =m1 sugge/+ ! =ms & expressions to be avoid$4 ,b ! true art ( lett]-writ+ re/s ) y--& y\r own p]sonality4 ,we w\ld sugge/ t y read c>efully ea* lett] y receive1 not+ & rememb]+ ^? expressions t mo/ appeal to y4 ,a good appeal is g5]ally univ]sal2 :at appeals to y 9 a lett] y receive w appeal to o!rs4 ,?us y w f9d t p]sonal exp]i5ce 9 ?is matt] w help y mu* m ?an any book t gives y only ! f\ndation ( =m & /yle4 ,,! ,,bus9ess ,,lett] ,x is int]e/+ to f9d 9 ! mid/ ( ! lam5t t 9 ! tw5tie? c5tury p h ceas$ to f9d "t to write lett]s or to be c\rte\s t ! ,po/ma/] ,g5]al has resc9d$ previ\s ord]s :i* direct$ t dep>tm5tal correspond5ce %\ld n beg9 ) ! c]emonial =m ( ,my de> ,sir1 & t ! complim5t>y close1 ,y\rs s9c]ely1 etc41 %\ld n be us$4 ,8 ord] is wor? quot+3 ,9 no "p ( our "w does ! dem& = ! human quality apply m ?an 9 ! matt] ( writ+ lett]s4 ,by f> ! l>ge/ contact ( ?is dep>tm5t ) ! public is by means ( ! lett]s :i* are writt54 ,lett]s c be cold1 /]eotyp$1 foll[+ ! same r\t9e day by day1 appe>+ m or less ma*9e made1 & ! impression :i* ! recipi5t has ^u read+ ! lett] is t ! sugge/ion1 compla9t1 petition or application made has be5 giv5 scant consid]ation4 ,i want e lett] t goes out f ?is dep>tm5t or any ( ! ,po/ ,(fices or o!r field (fices to conv9ce ! read] ( ! fact1 = x mu/ be a fact1 t :atev] he has writt5 has be5 receiv$ sympa!tically & t an ef=t has be5 made to give ! writ] ! b5efit ( e possible s]vice :i* ! dep>tm5t af=ds4 ,to ?is end ,i ?9k ! writ]s %\ld endeavor to make _! lett]s m in=mal ?an is n[ ! case g5]ally2 t !y %\ld1 :]ev] ! exig5cies ( ! case d n require o!rwise1 be z explicit z possible1 & t reasons = ! position tak5 by ! dep>tm5t %\ld be giv54 ,above all1 ,i d n want ! lett]s to be /]eotyp$4 ,a bus9ess lett] is writt5 ) a purpose4 ,x is a good lett] :5 x accompli%es t purpose briefly1 ?or\ghly1 & c\rte\sly4 ,wom5 especially %\ld be c>eful n to be discursive4 ,bus9ess m5 h n "t to puzzle ov] bad h&writ+ or ambigu\s s5t5ces4 ,:5ev] x c be done conv5i5tly ! bus9ess lett] %\ld be writt5 on ! typewrit]4 ,t9t$ /ation]y is nev] appropriate1 & rul$ /ation]y %\ld nev] be us$ ei!r = bus9ess or social correspond5ce4 ,! correct =m = ! salutation ( a bus9ess lett] includes ! "n & address ( ! p]son or firm to :om ! lett] is writt5 z well z ! c]emonial =m ( salutation4 ,?us3 ,brad=d & ,munro1 #ecd ,fif? ,av5ue1 ,new ,york ,city1 ,n4,y4 ,g5tlem53 7or ,de> ,sirs or ,my de> ,sirs7 ,mrs4 ,h4 ,k4 ,wea!rly1 ,secret>y ( ! ,citiz5s' ,league1 ,smi?ville1 ,arkansas4 ,de> ,mrs4 ,wea!rly3 7or ,de> ,madam or ,my de> ,madam7 ,except :5 x is ! fir/ ^w ( ! salutation1 de> %\ld n beg9 ) a capital lett]4 ,! address 9 ! salutation %\ld be repeat$ exactly on ! envelope & p>ticul> c>e %\ld be tak5 to make x legible4 ,! /amp %\ld always be plac$ 9 ! upp] "r-h& corn]4 ,x is bad =m to put x on obliquely or upside d[n or to place x 9 ! left-h& corn] or on ! back flap ( ! envelope4 ,x is a silly practice to d s & causes ! po/al cl]ks a great deal ( tr\ble4 ,,function ,,( ,,! ,,social ,,lett] ,!re are1 necess>ily1 sev]al k9ds ( lett]s1 ! ?ree mo/ important divisions ( :i* are ! fri5dly lett]1 ! bus9ess lett]1 & ! social lett]4 ,9 its /ricte/ s5se1 ! social lett] is writt5 = a di/9ct social purpose--usually ab\t1 or 9 response to1 "s purely social circum/ance4 ,! diff]5ce betwe5 a fri5dly lett] & a social lett] is relatively ! same z ! diff]5ce betwe5 a /rictly =mal & a fri5dly in=mal visit4 ,to write a fri5dly lett]1 "o simply writes :at "o feels1 he$+ no v /r+5t rules reg>d+ lett]-writ+4 ,b ! social lett]-writ] f9ds t !re are c]ta9 =ms t mu/ be c>efully obs]v$1 if 8 or h] lett]s are to be consid]$ entirely correct4 ,!re are two di/9ct =ms ( ! social lett]s--! =mal & ! in=mal4 ,! =mal social note is us$ only = invitations1 ann\ncem5ts & _! respective ackn[l$gm5ts4 ,x is always writt5 9 ! ?ird p]son1 & always requires an answ]4 ,ev5 ?\gh x is s5t to ! mo/ intimate fri5d1 ! =mal note rema9s =mal2 al?\gh lat] a fri5dly lett] may be s5t to remove any possible con/ra9t or *ill4 ,! in=mal note has no def9ite =mula1 except t x c be g5]ally comp>$ to all ! in=mal tr5d ( correct social usage4 ,! fir/ p]son is us$ 9 ! writ+ ( in=mal notes4 ,:e!r =mal or in=mal1 ! social note always be>s ! "n ( ! p]son to :om x is address$4 ,to illu/rate1 :5 writ+ socially to ,mrs4 ,joselyn1 "o does n use ! expression1 ,de> ,madam1 b ,de> ,mrs4 ,joslyn4 ,9 ,am]ica ! =m my de> is consid]$ a trifle m =mal ?an j de>1 al?\gh 9 ,engl& ! rev]se is true4 ,de> ,madam & ,de> ,sir are =ms res]v$ exclusively = use ) bus9ess lett]s4 ,,! ,,etiquette ,,( ,,/ation]y ,! well-kn[n prov]b may well be *ang$ to read1 ,a man is kn[n by ! /ation]y he uses4 ,!re is no great] opportunity to %[ good ta/e--or bad--?an 9 ! tone1 design & type ( note pap] we use4 ,x is z effective an index to "o's individuality z are ! clo!s we we>4 ,j z 9 ev]y?+ else1 !re are new fa%ions 9 ! sizes1 =ms & g5]al appe>ance ( social correspond5ce ea* season4 ,inv>iably1 ! new =m is an improvem5t on ! old] & m /ilt$ =m4 ,h[ev]1 !re are slight *anges1 & ! g5]al rules ( correct correspond5ce rema9 un*ang$ f ye> to ye>4 ,a good /ation] is ! be/ au?ority 9 reg>d to ! m9or modifications t come ea* new season4 ,! outr 9 ev]y?+ p]ta9+ to good social usage is (f5sive to good ta/e4 ,?us1 ^? :o are ref9$ & well-br$ avoid su* />tl+ color comb9ations z deep purple pap] inscrib$ ) :ite ink4 ,( c\rse1 by its v d>+1 su* a lett] w\ld ga9 imm$iate att5tion4 ,b ! impression made w\ld be "o ( poor ta/e & ecc5tricity1 r ?an ! /rik+ p]sonality ! writ] d\btless tri$ to convey4 ,let u1 !n1 avoid all fads 9 size & color ( social /ation]y ,,lett] ,,& ,,note ,,pap] ,pla91 unrul$ %eets1 ei!r :ite or light gray 9 color1 & fold+ once into _! envelopes are ! approv$ mat]ials = all social correspond5ce4 ,black ink %\ld always be us$--violet1 blue or purple expresses extremely bad ta/e4 ,!re are1 ( c\rse1 _m v>y+ qualities ( note pap]1 dep5d+ entirely ^u ! means & pref]5ces ( ! individual4 ,"s manufactur]s are to-day issu+ delightful /ation]y 9 delicate tones ( gray1 blue & buff1 & x is necess>y to m5tion "h t !re c be no objection to note pap] ( ?is k9d4 ,x is only bad ta/e to use pap] ( vivid r$1 yell[ or gre5--s gl>+ 9 color t x is conspicu\s4 ,color$ bord]s on /ation]y are 9 poor ta/e1 z are also heavy gilt edges4 ,panel$ /ation]y & t ) ! deckle edge are bo? v lovely & 9 excell5t ta/e1 if ! color is subdu$ or pure :ite4 ,& to be conspicu\s is to be ill-br$4 ,! complete text ( a =mal note mu/ appe> on ! fir/ page only4 ,?us1 a good size = a woman's social correspond5ce /ation>y is f\r & a half in*es by six in*es1 al?\gh x may be slightly l>g] ?an t = g5]al correspond5ce4 ,!n !re are ! v small %eets us$ m]ely = a few words ( condol5ce or congratulation4 ,! size ( /ation]y = m5's social correspond5ce v>ies1 b x is usually a trifle l>g] ?an a woman's note pap]4 ,a man nev] uses small %eets ( pap]1 nor may he conduct social correspond5ce ^u bus9ess or (fice pap]4 ,x is only :5 private /ation]y is n easily available1 & a lett] mu/ be imm$iately mail$1 t club or hotel pap] may be us$ = social correspond5ce4 ,lett] pap] & envelopes %\ld be ( ! same color & ( ab\t ! same mat]ial4 ,we say ab\t =1 :5 ! note pap] is v ?91 a slightly ?ick] pap] %\ld be us$ = ! envelope4 ,incid5tally1 v ?9 pap] is objectionable = social correspond5ce :5 bo? sides ( ! %eet are writt5 ^u4 ,"s wom5 l to use p]fum$ pap] = _! social correspond5ce4 ,:ile x is n exactly bad =m to use p]fum$ /ation]y1 a v /rong fragrance is mo/ objectionable4 ,?us only ! mo/ delicate ( p]fumes may be us$4 ,! use ( p]fumes = m5's /ation]y is entirely disc\nt5anc$4 ,,cre/s ,,& ,,monograms ,j z ! gaudy frills & furbel[s ( ! dress ( ,que5 ,elizabe?'s era h disappe>$1 s h ! elaborate cre/s1 seals & monograms ( e>li] social /ation]y gradually giv5 way to a m graceful & dignifi$ simplicity4 ,orig9ality may be ! possession ( ^? :o c atta9 x1 b x mu/ always be accompani$ by simplicity ( /yle4 ,gorge\s monograms are n desirable4 ,if us$ at all--& v few ev5 ( our pr\d & ari/ocratic families d use !m--!y %\ld be decorative )\t be+ elaborate4 ,a good /ation] %\ld be consult$ be=e "o det]m9es ^u a monogram4 ,8 ta/e & k %\ld direct ! ultimate *oice4 ,monograms & cre/s %\ld n appe> on ! envelope1 only on ! lett] pap]4 ,seals may be /amp$ :]ev] "o wi%es on ! back ( ! envelope1 al?\gh ! mo/ fa%ionable place is 9 ! direct c5t] ( ! flap4 ,on m\rn+ /ation]y1 black wax is p]missible = ! seal2 r$1 blue or any d>k color may be us$ on :ite or light gray pap]4 ,c>e %\ld be tak5 9 dropp+ ! hot wax & press+ ! seal1 = no?+ is s indicative ( poor ta/e z an untidy seal on ! envelope ( a social lett]4 ,a seal %\ld n be us$ unless x is actually ne$$4 ,x is bad =m to use x 9 addition to ! mucilage on ! flap ( ! envelope unless ! mucilage is ( a v poor quality4 ,a monogram or cre/ is plac$ 9 ! c5t] at ! top ( ! page :5 no address is giv54 ,x %\ld be omitt$ entirely :5 ! address appe>s at ! top ( ! page4 ,! space occupi$ by a cre/ or monogram %\ld n cov] m ?an ! approximate circumf]5ce ( a silv] dime4 ,a cre/ is usually /amp$ 9 gilt1 silv]1 black1 :ite or d>k gre54 ,vivid colors mu/ be avoid$4 ,:5 an address is engrav$ on a %eet ( pap] ! *e/ or monogram %\ld be omitt$4 ,! /ation]y ( a c\ntry h\se frequ5tly has ! "n ( ! place 9 ! upp] "r h& corn] ) ! "n ( ! po/ (fice or railroad /ation opposite4 ,au?ors sometimes h _! names reproduc$ f _! own h&writ+ & engrav$ across ! top ( ! pap] !y use = _! bus9ess correspond5ce4 ,! mo/ fa%ionable /ation]y to-day does n be> cre/s or monograms or seals1 b ! address engrav$ 9 ,go?ic or ,roman lett]+ 9 ! upp] c5t] ( note & lett] %eets1 also on ! rev]se side ( ! envelope4 ,black ink1 ( c\rse1 is us$4 ,,use ,,( ,,! ,,typewrit] ,hav+ invad$ & conqu]$ ! bus9ess _w1 ! typewrit] has n[ become a social necessity4 ,p]sonal typewrit]s1 made 9 portable sizes1 are n[ be+ us$ = social correspond5ce1 al?\gh _m cons]vative p pref] to rema9 loyal to ! use ( ! old p5 & ink me?od4 ,yet1 :5 ! be/ h&writ+ is (t5 illegible & h>d to read1 a mod]n inv5tion s necess>y z ! typewrit] %\ld be hail$ ) delight & us$ ) en?usiasm4 ,!re /ill may be a few extremi/s & etiquette fanatics :o insi/ t typewritt5 lett]s are = bus9ess purposes only1 & t !y are an insult :5 us$ socially4 ,preval5t cu/om to-day p]mits typewritt5 correspond5ce = ne>ly e occasion1 & ! well-typ$ social lett] reflects bett] ta/e ^u ! s5d] ?an a h&-writt5 lett] t is difficult to read--& yet took a mu* great] l5g? ( "t to write4 ,social lett]s1 :e!r h& or typewritt5 %\ld n be on ord9>y comm]cial pap]4 ,! lett] writt5 on ! ma*9e %\ld h a wide m>g9 at ! top1 bottom & sides4 ,signatures to a typewritt5 lett]1 social or bus9ess1 %\ld be made p]sonally1 9 ink4 ,,reg>d+ ,,! ,,salutation ,x is only 9 cases ( extreme =mality t ! expression ,de> ,madam or ,de> ,sir is us$4 ,= ord9>y social correspond5ce1 ! salutation is ei!r ,de> ,mr4 7,mrs47 ,rob]ts or ,my de> ,mr4 7,mrs47 ,rob]ts4 ,! use ( ,my de> is consid]$ m =mal ?an m]ely ,de>1 except 9 ,engl& :]e ! fir/ =m is consid]$ ! m intimate4 ,! =m ,de> ,miss or ,de> ,fri5d may be us$ on no condition :atev]4 ,x is ei!r ,de> ,miss ,wimb]ly or ,de> ,madam4 ,x is consid]$ presumptu\s1 9 good society1 = a man to address a lady z ,de> ,mrs4 ,br[n until %e has fir/ dropp$ ! =mal my 9 h] correspond5ce ) him4 ,! /rictly =mal me?od = address+ a lett] to a man by a woman :o is a total /rang] to him1 is3 ,mr4 ,john ,d4 ,br[n1 ,de> ,sir4 ,if he is a di/ant relative1 address$ = ! fir/ "t1 or ! fri5d ( a v intimate fri5d1 ! salutation may read1 ,my de> ,mr4 ,br[n4 ,,clos+ ,,! ,,lett] ,! end+s ,v truly y\rs or ,y\rs truly express a c]ta9 =mality4 ,fri5dly lett]s are clos$ ) su* expressions z1 ,y\rs mo/ s9c]ely1 ,cordially y\rs1 ,v affectionately y\rs1 ,lov+ly y\rs4 ,! latt] two expressions are conf9$ l>gely to intimate fri5ds & relatives1 :ile ! o!rs are us$ :5 lett]s are writt5 to new acqua9tances or casual fri5ds4 ,! pron\n y\rs %\ld nev] be omitt$1 z x leaves ! phrase unf9i%$ & is n complim5t>y to ! p]son address$4 ,?us1 clos+s1 su* z ,v truly or ,s9c]ely are 9 bad =m4 ,always rememb] 9 social lett]-writ+1 to make a graceful exit4 ,an awkw>d s5t5ce 9 clos+ (t5 m>s :at w\ld o!rwise be a p]fect lett]4 ,=get c]ta9 /ra9$ expressions t rema9 9 ! m9d & dem& to be us$ z clos+s1 m]ely because !y h be5 us$ by s _m p1 ov] & ov] aga94 ,make ! f>ewell 9 y\r social lett]s z cordial & graceful z y\r f>ewell w\ld be if y 7 talk+ to ! p]son1 in/ead ( writ+4 ,su* k9d expressions z ,) k9de/ p]sonal reg>ds or ,hop+ to h ! pleasure ( see+ y soon or ,) be/ wi%es to y\r de> "m & si/]s always add a note ( w>m? & cordiality to ! social lett]4 ,^! %\ld be foll[$ by ,i am4 ,x is n consid]$ good =m to end a lett]1 ,hop+ to he> f y soon1 ,y\rs s9c]ely1 b x %\ld be ,hop+ to he> f y soon1 ,i am ,y\rs s9c]ely1 ,no comma is us$ aft] am4 ,x is n good ta/e to use only ! initials1 ! surnames or giv5 names alone1 or dim9utives1 :5 sign+ notes or lett]s except :5 !y are address$ to "o's mo/ intimate fri5ds4 ,a m>ri$ woman signs h] self ,ell5 ,scott1 n ,mrs4 ,guy ,scott1 9 social correspond5ce4 ,(t51 9 bus9ess lett]s1 :5 ! recipi5t w\ld be 9 d\bt z to :e!r or n ! lady 7 to be address$ z ,mrs4 or ,miss1 ! conclusion to ! lett] %\ld be 9 ?is =m3 ,y\rs truly1 ,ell5 ,scott 7,mrs4 ,guy ,scott7 ,an unm>ri$ woman signs h] lett]s ,m>g>et ,scott1 unless x is a bus9ess communication & %e is liable to be mi/ak5 = a wid[4 ,9 ?is case1 %e prec$es h] "n by ! ^w ,miss 9 p>5!ses4 ,! fir/ & la/ names ( ! man writ+ ! lett] mu/ be giv5 9 full1 & if !re is a middle "n1 ei!r ! initial or full spell+ may be giv54 ,b su* a signature z ,j4 ,f]r9 ,rob9s is bad =m4 ,x is bo? undignifi$ & confus+ to sign a lett] ) "o's ,*ri/ian "n only1 unless "o is a relative or v intimate fri5d4 ,a woman nev] signs h] ,*ri/ian "n alone 9 a lett] to a man unless he is a relative or h] fianc or a v old fri5d ( ! family4 ,,address+ ,,! ,,envelope ,al?\gh !re is a di/9ction 9 ,engl& reg>d+ ! use ( ,mr4 & ,esq41 bo? =ms are optional "h 9 ,am]ica4 ,ei!r "o may be us$ 9 good =m4 ,b to omit bo?1 & address a man j z ,walt] ,j4 ,smi? is exce$+ly rude & bad ta/e4 ,nei!r %\ld ,esq4 & ,jr4 be us$ toge!r 9 ?is mann]1 ,walt] ,j4 ,smi?1 ,esq41 ,jr4 ,! correct =m w\ld be ,walt] ,j4 ,smi?1 ,jr4 ,a s]vant w\ld be address$ m]ely z ,walt] ,j4 ,smi?1 )\t any title4 ,mrs4 or ,miss mu/ inv>iably prec$e ! "n ( a woman on an envelope unless %e is a pr(essional woman ) "s su* title z ,dr4 ,a woman does n assume h] husb&'s honor>y title2 ?us1 x is n good =m to address an envelope 9 ?is mann]3 ,mrs4 ,capta9 ,smi? or ,mrs4 ,judge ,&rews4 ,a practic+ woman physician is address$ 9 ?is fa%ion1 :5 ! communication is pr(essional3 ,dr4 ,ell5 ,r4 ,blank4 ,?is =m is n us$ 9 social correspond5ce1 except 9 ! case ( a v fam\s1 eld]ly physician :o is entitl$ to ! honor>y title at all times4 ,o!rwise ?is =m is us$ :5 ! communication is social3 ,miss ,ell5 ,r4 ,blank or ,mrs4 ,john ,t4 ,blank4 ,,lett]s ,,( ,,condol5ce ,lett]s ( condol5ce %\ld nev] be writt51 unless ! writ] has be5 g5u9ely mov$ to sympa?y4 ,= t reason1 !y are usually =?com+ only f relatives & intimate fri5ds ( ! b]eav$ family4 ,a lett] ( sympa?y %\ld be brief & cordial4 ,^? pret5ti\s lett]s t are fill$ ) poetic quotations & s5tim5tal expressions are n g5u9ely sympa!tic1 & ^? t ref] con/antly to ! deceas$ are unk9d4 ,a few well-*os5 words ( sympa?y are all t is necess>y4 ,foll[+ are two model lett]s ( condol5ce1 t may be us$ z basic =ms = o!r lett]s3 ,new ,york1 ,augu/ #bd?4 ,de> ,miss ,curtis3 ,i ha/5 to (f] y my mo/ pr(\nd sympa?y = ! great grief t has fall5 ^u y & y\r h\se-hold4 ,if !re is any?+ ,i c d1 ,i hope y w n hesitate to call ^u me4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,h>riet ,b4 ,wa9wright4 ,philadelphia1 ,may #e?4 ,my de> ,mrs4 ,&rews3 ,kn[+ z ,i d f my own exp]i5ce h[ deep y\r grief mu/ be ,i also "k t !re is little t anyone c say or d to make y\r sorr[ any ! less4 ,yet ,i _c refra9 f (f]+ my s9c]e/ sympa?y1 & along ) x ! hope t ,"t1 :i* s(t5s all ?+s1 w make ev5 ?is easi] to be>4 ,believe me1 mo/ s9c]ely y\rs1 ,lillian ,m4 ,rob]ts4 ,,ackn[l$g+ ,a ,,lett] ,,( ,,condol5ce ,m\rn+ or :ite pap] is always us$ :5 answ]+ a lett] ( condol5ce1 except :5 ! engrav$ c>ds ( ackn[l$gm5t are s5t4 ,^! are sev]ely pla91 & ! message is always brief4 ,(t5 !y are s5t 9 ! "n ( ! entire family1 z3 ,mr4 & ,mrs4 ,john ,hall ,hammond gratefully ackn[l$ge y\r expression ( sympa?y ^u ! dea? ( _! daught]4 ,june #f1 #aiba4 ,?is is c]ta9ly ! easie/ way = ! b]eav$ to express _! gratitude1 ?\gh simple notes ( ?anks may be s5t in/ead ( ! m =mal c>d4 ,,etiquette ,,( ,,! ,,fri5dly ,,lett] ,x is (t5 a moot "q among fri5ds z to :o %all write ! fir/ lett]4 ,g5]ally speak+1 x is ! "o :o has gone away r ?an ! "o :o rema9s beh9d :o writes fir/1 ?\gh among good fri5ds !re is no m necessity to c\nt lett]s ?an !re is to c\nt visits4 ,! writ] knew a college girl :o1 :5 %e came home1 decid$ to wait be=e writ+ & see h[ _m ( h] fri5ds c>$ en\gh = h] to write to h]4 ,%e 0 r gratifi$ by ! result b if ea* girl :o came away f ! s*ool _h arriv$ at ! same decision ! situation w\ld h be5 a v que] "o1 to say ! lea/ ( x4 ,a "y lady :o has gone away may s5d a c>d or write a brief note to a g5tleman b if he is ! "o :o has dep>t$ %e %\ld n write to him until %e has receiv$ a lett] f him4 ,"s p may feel t a disc\rse on fri5dly lett]s has no place 9 a book on social int]c\rse4 ,b we feel t social success is j z l>gely dep5d5t ^u "o's simple fri5d%ips z x is ^u highly extravagant social activities1 & !re=e x is necess>y to "k some?+ ab\t ! fri5dly lett]4 ,! salutation 9 a fri5dly lett] %\ld always be ,de> ,m>y or ,de> ,miss ,jones4 ,! text ( ! lett] %\ld be writt5 ) ease1 & in/ead ( a long li/ ( que/ions 7z "s lett]-writ]s delight 9 us+71 bits ( *oice news ( ! day1 int]e/+ p]sonal exp]i5ces1 & ! l %\ld be disclos$4 ,z ,elizabe? ,my]s 9 h] book ,! ,social ,lett]1 says3 ,! fri5dly lett] is our proxy = a little tte--tte1 tell+ ( ! p]sonal news ( ! day1 & %\ld be z extemporane\s z daily spee*4 ,su* lett]s are giv5 free scope & x w\ld be z bootless to dictate rules z x w\ld be to commit a monologue to memory prior to a fri5dly visit4 ,unless y are v intimate ) a fri5d1 & y\r lett] conta9s id5tify+ news1 d n sign y\rself m]ely ) y\r ,*ri/ian "n4 ,!re are _m ,m>ys1 & ,johns & ,h>olds2 & a lett] sign$ ) ! full "n is z cordial z "o :i* gives only ! baptismal "n4 ,!re is an old ,lat9 prov]b1 ,lit]a scripta manet1 mean+ ,! writt5 lett] rema9s4 ,a v pretty s5tim5t is atta*$ to ?is "o %ort s5t5ce4 ,x means n only t ! lett] itself rema9s1 b t ! ?\ghts conta9$ 9 t lett]1 ! k9d1 unselfi%1 pretty ?\ghts ( fri5d%ip1 rema9 =ev] 9 he>t & m9d ( ! p]son = :om x 0 int5d$4 ,:5 y write to y\r fri5ds1 make y\r lett]s s beautiful 9 =m & text1 t !y w be read1 re-read1 & *]i%$ a long "t aft] z a fond memory4 ,x w be a big /ep on ! road to social p]fection4 ,ano!r po9t to be kept 9 m9d is t no?+ %\ld be writt5 9 a lett] t "o w\ld n be will+ = almo/ anyone to see4 ,lett]s sometimes travel f>1 & "o c nev] be altoge!r sure into :at h&s !y may fall4 ,,! ,,*ild',s ,,lett] ,! soon] ! *ild is taught to take c>e ( 8 or h] own p]sonal correspond5ce1 ! soon] he or %e w become p]fect 9 ! art ( lett]-writ+4 ,! little ones %\ld be taught e>ly ! significance ( ! correct lett]1 ! importance ( correct social correspond5ce4 ,_! duties at fir/ may be light1 & guid$ entirely by "m's sugge/ions2 b ! y\ng/]s w soon f9d ke5 pleasure & enjoym5t 9 creat+ lett]s !mselves4 ,"h are a few lett]s t might h be5 writt5 by *ildr5 betwe5 ! ages ( sev5 & twelve4 ,!y are n (f]$ z model lett]s1 = *ildr5 h a great deal m p]sonality ?an gr[n-ups1 & !y mu/ get t p]sonality into :at !y write2 o!rwise ! lett] w be /ra9$ & unnatural4 ,d n be too critical ( _! fir/ ef=ts4 ,pass ov] mi/akes1 & let ! lett] s\nd z if ! *ild & n y _h writt5 x4 ,at ! same "t tea* !m to be c>eful4 ,) a v small bit ( diplomacy ! *ild c be br\ght to take great pride 9 a lett] :i* he wrote ) 8 own h&4 ,& don't make ! *ildr5 say ?+s t !y d n want to4 ,protect !m f ! petty ins9c]ities ( social life z long z possible4 ,de> ,aunt ,may3 ,?ank y ev] s mu* = ! pretty doll4 ,i h nam$ h] ,may4 ,"m ?9ks %e is v pretty b ,tom does n4 ,tom does n l dolls4 ,he plays ) ! dog & 8 tops & m>bles ne>ly all ! "t4 ,! dog's "n is ,mike4 ,he is black4 ,i l him lots4 ,we are go+ to h /rawb]ry ice cream ,sunday4 ,i wi% y c\ld be "h4 ,i w\ld give y a big plate full4 ,please come to see me soon4 ,y\r lov+ niece1 ,hel54 ,de> ,uncle ,frank1 ,i h a box ( pa9ts4 ,i pa9t$ a dog & a soldi] ?is morn+4 ,! soldi] has on a r$ coat4 ,! dog is a po9t]4 ,my dog is a rat t]ri] nam$ ,jack4 ,he caught a big rat ?is morn+ 9 ! b>n4 ,"m says %e ?9ks he has be5 eat+ ! *ick5s4 ,s*ool w be out 9 a week4 ,i w be glad4 ,"m says %e w n4 ,i "k h[ to swim4 ,!re is a creek ne> "h4 ,! wat] is ov] my head 9 "o place4 ,i am go+ fi%+ "o day next week4 ,i caught two p]* la/ "t ,i w5t4 ,y\r nephew1 ,john4 ,de> ,gr&ma3 ,i wi% y a v happy bir?day1 & ,i hope t y w l ! pres5t ,i s5t y4 ,"m says t %e w take me to see y soon4 ,i wi% %e c\ld take me to-day4 ,y\r lov+ gr&*ild1 ,mabel4 ,,lett]s ,,to ,,p]sons ,,( ,,title ,a c]ta9 set ( def9ite rules is prescrib$ = all communication ) titl$ p4 ,! g5]al rules giv5 = ord9>y social correspond5ce are n ! same = p]sons ( title1 & z ea* executive1 dignit>y & man or woman ( royal blood requires special address1 x w be necess>y to incorporate !m into a compact scale t c be easily ref]r$ to4 ,at ! end ( ?is volume is a scale giv+ ! op5+1 clos+ & address1 =mal & in=mal1 = e p]son ( title4 ,,*apt] ,,vii ,,p>5ts ,,& ,,*ildr5 ,,! ,,home ,! home is ! unit ( our social life1 & j z ! :ole c be no great] ?an ! sum ( its p>ts s ! /&>d ( behavior 9 a community c be no high] ?an ! sum ( ! /&>ds 9 ! homes t make up t community4 ,if 9 ! home "o obs]ves /rictly ! rules ( polit5ess1 :i* means k9dness1 "o w h v little tr\ble ) ! rules ( etiquette1 :i* is simply ! way polit5ess f9ds expression 9 our int]c\rse ) ea* o!r4 ,m9or canons ( etiquette *ange f "t to "t b good mann]s are always ! same1 & nev] out ( fa%ion4 ,,appe>ance ,,( ,,! ,,h\se ,obvi\sly a book on etiquette _c g into ! problems ( int]ior decoration2 yet a ^w or two w n be out ( place4 ,! influ5ce ( "o's surr\nd+s on "o's temp] is enorm\s ?\gh ! p]son may be unconsci\s ( ! fact4 ,a disord]$ room gives a feel+ ( depression & hopelessness to ! "o :o ent]s x :ile "o t is tidy t5ds to imp>t a feel+ ( re/fulness4 ,if 9 addition to its neatness x is furni%$ 9 h>moni\s colors--& "o _c be too c>eful ( ! colors t are us$ 9 ! home--9 subdu$ tones x w contribute mu* m to ! peace & happ9ess ( ! home ?an ev5 ^? :o live !re realize4 ,x w n elim9ate bad temp]s or d away ) disagreeable mom5ts b x w c]ta9ly help to r$uce !m to a m9imum4 ,,dress ,9 ano!r volume 9 ! *apt] on fun]als we h spok5 ( ! influ5ce ( dress1 especially ( ! influ5ce ( ! con/ant pres5ce ( black on "y *ildr54 ,?is is only "o small phase ( a v big subject4 ,9 ! home ! *ief requisite ( "o's dress is neatness4 ,a man w f9d x mu* easi] to accord ! little c\rtesies ( well-br$ society to 8 wife if %e is neatly & becom+ly dress$1 h[ev] simple ! g[n may be1 ?an if %e is slatt]nly & untidy4 ,! *ildr5 also w f9d x mu* easi] to love1 honor & obey if _! p>5ts give a reasonable am\nt ( "t to tak+ c>e ( _! p]sonal appe>ance4 ,x is n ! mo/ important ?+ 9 life b x is "o ( ! little ?+s t ( l>ge life make ! :ole & "o t has mu* to d ) mak+ x pleasant or unpleasant4 ,9 "o ( ,o4 ,h5ry's /ories a little girl d[n on ,*ry/ie ,/reet asks h] fa!r1 a r$-hair$1 un%av51 untidy man sitt+ %oeless by ! w9d[ to play a game ( *eck]s ) h]4 ,he refuses & ! *ild goes out into ! /reet to play ) ! o!r *ildr5 9 ! corridors ( ! h\se ( s94 ,! /ory is n a pretty "o4 ,six or sev5 ye>s lat] !re is a dance1 a murd] & a plunge into ! ,ea/ ,riv]4 ,& !n ! great %ort /ory writ] says t he dream$ ! re/ ( ! /ory4 ,he ?\ght he 0 9 ! next _w & ,liz1 = t 0 ! girl's "n1 0 be+ tri$ = murd] & self-de/ruction4 ,!re 0 no d\bt b t %e _h committ$ ! crimes ascrib$ to h]1 b ! v]dict ( ! (fic] 9 ! cele/ial c\rt 01 ,dis*>g$4 ,& he add$1 ,! guilty p>ty y've got to look = 9 ?is case is a r$-hair$1 un%av51 untidy man1 sitt+ by ! w9d[ read+1 9 8 /ock+ feet1 :ile 8 *ildr5 play 9 ! /reets4 ,x is n s mu* t dress 9 itself is important b t x is an index to s mu* else1 & :ile x is n an infallible "o x is ab\t z ne> "r z any we h4 ,,dress ,,= ,,*ildr5 ,!re c be no?+ q s humiliat+ to a *ild z to be dress$ 9 an outl&i% fa%ion t r5d]s him conspicu\s4 ,"s mo!rs1 delight+ 9 ! attractive clo!s t !y buy = _! *ildr51 d n realize :at havoc !y are caus+ to ! ta/es ( ! *ild4 ,a little boy %\ld be dress$ l a little boy1 & he %\ld be all[$ to develop 8 own ta/es 9 ! selection ( 8 suits & bl\ses4 ,a little girl %\ld by all means be all[$ to make h] *oice ( ! clo!s %e is to we>1 guid$ by "m's sup]ior k & exp]i5ce4 ,b to =ce a *ild to we> a g>m5t aga9/ :i* its v s\l revolts1 is to cru% :atev] natural in/9cts ! *ild may h = ! beautiful & arti/ic4 ,x is sad to see a *ild frett+ uncom=tably 9 a suit t is too tight1 or a huge sailor hat t laps d[n ov] ! eyes4 ,simple1 com=table clo!s are ! be/ = *ildr51 b !y %\ld be excell5t mat]ial4 ,r give ! *ild "o dress ( excell5t mat]ial & workman%ip1 ?an two t are faulty & inf]ior4 ,tea* h] to appreciate mat]ial & %e w always pref] quality to gaud9ess4 ,,*ildr5 ,,& ,,developm5t ,x is n en\gh to give *ildr5 ! mat]ial ?+s ( life4 ,!re are "s ?+s t money _c buy1 & ?is ?+ we call culture is "o ( !m4 ,x is a "p ( ! heavy responsibility ( p>5ts to lead ! *ildr5 9 _! *>ge into ! pa?s ( "r ?9k+ & "r liv+ & ! task %\ld be a joy\s "o4 ,= e *ild born into ! _w has inf9ite possibilities & at its v wor/ ! task is illum9$ by ! ray ( hope4 ,ev5 ! ugly duckl+ became a swan4 ,,"k ,,y\r ,,*ildr56 ,make t y\r fir/ comm&m5t 9 y\r plan ( *ild-nature4 ,"k y\r *ildr56 ,& by kn[+ we d n mean _! faults1 _! likes & dislikes1 _! habits4 ,"k _! ambitions1 _! little hopes1 _! fe>s & joys & sorr[s4 ,be n only _! advisors & p>5ts1 b _! fri5ds4 ,9 8 book1 ,mak+ ! ,mo/ ( ,*ildr51 ,la ,rue says3 ,we may say !re are f\r k9ds ( p>5ts1--spades1 clubs1 diamonds & he>ts4 ,! spade p>5t1 he expla9s1 is buri$ 9 8 "w1 eag] only to clo! attractively ! body ( ! *ild1 b will+ t ! s\l g nak$4 ,! club p>5t is engross$ 9 social activities2 ! fa!r ) 8 clubs & sports1 ! "m ) h] d9n]s & ent]ta9m5ts4 ,! diamond p>5ts love glitt] & o/5tation4 ,!y mu/ seem weal?y & prosp]\s at all co/4 ,!y devote _! "t & ?\ghts to _! home & outw>d appe>ance--!y nev] ?9k ab\t kn[+ _! *ildr54 ,b ! he>t p>5t1 ,la ,rue tells u1 is ! man or woman :o is ess5tially a home mak]4 ,he provides a libr>y = ! *ild1 a cozy room1 an environm5t t is truly home4 ,& he sp5ds "t ) him1 le>n+ all ab\t 8 hopes & ambitions1 enc\rag+ him1 tea*+ him4 ,he kn[s ! *ild2 & ! *ild kn[s t he has a fri5d ^u :om to dep5d n only = mat]ial com=ts b = spiritual advice & guidance4 ,y mu/ "k y\r *ildr51 be=e y c attempt to make !m well-mann]$ & well-br$4 ,,imitation ,! /ronge/ =ce t ent]s into ! mold+ ( *ildr5's "* & deportm5t is ! "* & deportm5t ( _! own p>5ts4 ,y\ng/]s _c f9d ! beautiful gift ( good mann]s 9 "s unkn[n place2 :atev] !y d & say is 9 imitation ( some?+ !y he>d _! eld]s d & say4 ,! :ole life ( a man or woman is color$ by ! environm5t & atmosph]e ( 8 or h] e>ly *ildhood4 ,*ildr5 %\ld n be taught p>ty mann]s4 ,if !y are to be well-br$ at all1 !y mu/ be s at all times2 & ill-br$ p>5ts c no m h well-br$ *ildr5 ?an an oak tree c h p9e ne$les4 ,& ! *ief beauty ( p]fect mann]s is t !y are s habitual z to be p]fectly unconsci\s4 ,( great importance1 !re=e1 is ! law ( tea*+ by example4 ,%[ ! *ildr5 t y y\rself foll[ ! laws ( good conduct & c\rtesy4 ,:e!r gue/s are pres5t or n1 let y\r table etiquette be faultless4 ,address ev]yone1 & especially ! *ildr5 !mselves1 ) /udi$ c\rtesy & ?\ghtfulness4 ,a well-br$ *ild is kn[n imm$iately by 8 or h] spee*2 & :5 c\rtesy & g5tle1 polite conv]sation is ! rule 9 ! home1 x w foll[ z ! night ! day t x w be ! rule else:]e4 ,p>5ts inv>iably feel emb>rassm5t at ! ill-mann]s & lack ( c\rtesy on ! "p ( _! *ildr54 ,!y w\ld (t5 be able to avoid ?is emb>rassm5t if !y realiz$ t x 0 simply _! mann]s & lack ( c\rtesy 9 ! home1 an indication t !y !mselves neglect ! t5ets ( good bre$+4 ,,! ,,*ild',s ,,spee* ,x is a v grave mi/ake to repress con/antly ! spee* ( *ildr54 ,b x is necess>y t !y %\ld be taught e>ly ! true value ( conv]sation1 in/ead ( be+ p]mitt$ to prattle nons5se4 ,an excell5t tra9+ is to conv]se ) ! *ild :5 y are alone ) him1 draw+ out 8 ideas1 giv+ him food = ?\ght1 tell+ him int]e/+ /ories & wat*+ 8 reactions4 ,9 address+ eld]s ! *ild %\ld "k exactly ! correct =ms to use4 ,= in/ance1 x is no long] consid]$ good =m = anyone except s]vants or tradespeople to use ! expressions ,yes1 ma'am1 & ,yes1 sir4 ,/ill !re is "s def]5ce due p>5ts & eld]s1 & ! correct me?od ( address is1 ,yes1 "m1 or ,no1 fa!r1 or ,?ank y1 ,mr4 ,gray4 ,! mann] ( ! *ild is j z important z ! =m ( expression2 a c\rte\s1 respectful mann] %\ld always be us$ t[>ds eld]s4 ,contradictions are unbecom+ 9 *ildr54 ,yet ! "y girl or boy mu/ be entitl$ to 8 or h] own op9ion4 ,if some?+ is said ) :i* he does n agree1 & if he is tak+ "p 9 ! conv]sation1 he may say1 ,i beg y\r p>don1 b4444 or1 ,i really ?9k y are mak+ a mi/ake4 ,i ?9k t4444 ,,at ,,! ,,table ,! f9al te/ ( good mann]s comes at ! table4 ,rememb]+ ?is ! p>5ts %\ld lay special /ress on ?is "p ( a *ild's tra9+1 s z to make 8 mann] ( eat+ z natural z 8 mann] ( brea?+4 ,& "o is almo/ z important z ! o!r4 ,!re are no p>ticul> rules = *ildr5 beyond ^? :i* old] p %\ld foll[ & ^! are giv5 fur!r on 9 ?is volume4 ,*ildr5 are really little m5 & wom5 & _! tra9+ is all = ! purpose ( equipp+ !m to live ! lives ( m5 & wom5 9 ! happie/ & mo/ useful way possible4 ,a *ild %\ld nev] seat himself until ^? old] ?an he are 9 place ?\gh ev5 ?is %\ld n be o/5tati\s4 ,z soon z ! "m or :oev] is presid+ at ! table indicates t x is "t = !m to be seat$ !y all %\ld take _! places almo/ simultane\sly4 ,disp>ag+ comm5ts on ! food are ill-br$4 ,unpleasant incid5ts %\ld be pass$ ov] lightly :e!r !y take place 9 ! intimacy ( ! home circle or 9 a m =mal ga!r+4 ,! conv]sation %\ld be agreeable4 ,qu>rel+1 nagg+1 gossip+1 sc&al-mong]+1 & frett+ are absolutely taboo4 ,,playmates ,we h already said t *ildr5 cat* _! mann]s f ! p ab\t !m4 ,?is is z true ( _! playmates z ( _! p>5ts & :5 ! *ild is 9 s*ool ne>ly all day & play+ out some:]e ! re/ ( ! "t except dur+ ! ev5+ :5 he is at home /udy+ x is p]haps ev5 m s4 ,! mo/ rigid discipl9e & ! mo/ lov+ c>e w n prevail aga9/ ! example ( ,tom1 ,dick1 or ,h>ry1 if ^! ?ree h be5 all[$ to run wild4 ,!re is a glamor ab\t lawlessness ev5 among *ildr54 ,?is %\ld be kept 9 m9d by _! p>5ts1 & :ile !y %\ld be plac$1 ins(> z x is possible1 among desirable playmates1 !re %\ld n be too /]n repression4 ,= ?is may /ifle developm5t1 x may bre$ sull5ness1 or x may eng5d] rebellion4 ,!re are too _m p>5ts to-day :o try to br+ up _! *ildr5 by ! rule4 ,!re is no rule4 ,ea* *ild is a law unto himself & ! be/ way ! "m or fa!r c le>n to take c>e ( him is to /udy ! y\ng/] himself4 ,in/ead ( ! swagg]+ playmate or "o t is o!rwise undesirable ! p>5t %\ld (f] some?+ bett]4 ,( c\rse1 he %\ld be 8 *ild's fri5d & c\nselor z well z 8 p>5t1 b ! wise/ & mo/ lovable p>5t t ev] liv$ c\ld n satisfy all ! long+s & desires ( ! *ild's he>t4 ,he ne$s companion%ip ( 8 own age4 ,! con/ant friction among playmates is ! be/ way 9 ! _w to rub away %>p corn]s & r\gh places4 ,games1 books1 music1 toys1 fri5ds--c>efully *os51 ^! are ! mo/ important elem5ts :i* ent] into ! mold+ ( ! *ild's life & are !re=e ! ones to :i* greate/ att5tion %\ld be giv54 ,,*ildr5',s ,,p>ties ,a p>ty is some?+ t ! av]age *ild looks back ^u ) pleasure = a long1 long "t4 ,!re is no m pleasant way ( inculcat+ a feel+ ( g5u9e hospitality or ( br++ ab\t an easy mann] 9 ! draw+-room ?an ?r\gh all[+ *ildr5 to h p>ties & giv+ !m a l>ge %>e ( ! responsibility = mak+ !m successful4 ,! "m %\ld sup]9t5d ev]y?+ b %e %\ld consult & advise ! *ild ab\t favors1 refre%m5ts1 etc4 ,! mo/ attractive invitations are ^? :i* ! y\ng/] himself writes4 ,*>m+ designs may be _h f ! /ation]s ) blank spaces to be fill$ 9 by ! p]son s5d+ !m4 ,?is makes ! *ild's task delightful z well z simple4 ,until he is old en\gh to write1 8 "m p5s 8 invitations4 ,r>ely are engrav$ invitations us$ = a *ildr5's affair4 ,! invitation may be address$ to ! *ild or to its "m & s9ce p>ties = little p are usually v in=mal ! invitation %\ld be in=mal also4 ,! foll[+ %[s a =m :i* is sometimes us$3 ,de> ,mrs4 ,grant1 ,i am hav+ a little p>ty = "s ( ,julian's fri5ds ,?ursday aft]noon & am s anxi\s = ,m>y to come4 ,if y w s5d h] ab\t f\r o'clock ,i w see t %e gets back home ar\nd six4 ,cordially y\rs1 ,agnes ,k4 ,m>%all ,if ! invitation is address$ to ! *ild x might be word$ some?+ l ?is3 ,de> ,m>y1 ,julian is plann+ to h a little p>ty ,?ursday aft]noon & he wants y to come ab\t f\r o'clock4 ,tell y\r "m t we w see t y get home ab\t six4 ,we bo? want y v mu*4 ,cordially y\r fri5d1 ,agnes ,k4 ,m>%all4 ,bir?day p>ties are usually held 9 ! aft]noon betwe5 ?ree & six4 ,old] *ildr51 ^? ( ! ,sweet ,sixte5 age1 may h p>ties f f\r to sev51 or eight o'clock4 ,hall[e'en1 ,new ,ye> & ,/4 ,patrick's ,day p>ties = little tots1 are inv>iably 9 ! aft]noon4 ,"m %\ld arrange = suffici5t int]e/+ games to keep ! y\ng/]s amus$ & ent]ta9$2 & x always adds greatly to ! fun1 if a little prize is (f]$ = ! w9n] ( ea* game4 ,p>ties & ice-cream1 ( c\rse1 g h& 9 h&4 ,sweets1 cakes & fruit usually accompany ! ice-cream4 ,sometimes hot *ocolate & waf]s are s]v$ to ! y\ng/]s4 ,at ! bir?day p>ty1 ! inevitable bir?day cake is usually cut & s]v$ by ! "y ho/ or ho/ess4 ,"m mu/ n =get ! c&les1 "o = ea* ye> & "o = good measure4 ,! refre%m5ts at "y folks' p>ties are usually s]v$ at or ab\t f\r o'clock4 ,x is mo/ ess5tial to h a suffici5t numb] ( amusem5ts plann$ to keep ! *ildr5 ent]ta9$ e m9ute ( ! "t4 ,!y _c be tru/$ to take c>e ( !mselves especially if ! p>ty is a mix$ "o4 ,! ho/ess mu/ also be c>eful n to h ! games s active z to tire ! y\ng/]s out & %e mu/ be sure t ! refre%m5ts are :olesome4 ,x is no v small und]tak+ to give a successful *ildr5's p>ty b ! rew>d is great en\gh to make x wor? :ile4 ,,plann+ ,,surprises ,! two important rules ( *ildr5's p>ties may be analyz$ briefly z3 simplicity & a surprise comb9$ ) susp5se4 ,susp5se is especially important2 *ildr5 h impati5t little s\ls & :5 !y are promis$ "s /range & vague surprise1 !y are delight$ beyond measure1 & sp5d ! "t await+ x ) ke5 delight & expectation4 ,! surprise may consi/ ( a huge ,jack ,horn] pie1 fill$ ) pretty s\v5irs4 ,x may be a ,br[nie p>ty1 ) cunn+ little ,br[nie hoods & caps previ\sly prep>$ = ! "y visitors4 ,x may be any "o ( a ?\s& gay1 simple1 *ildhood games t y\ng/]s delight 94 ,to (f] a prize = ! w9n] always ar\ses ke5 int]e/ 9 ! game4 ,,receiv+ ,,! ,,"y ,,gue/s ,at *ildr5's p>ties1 ! ho/ess /&s 9 ! backgr\nd cordially second+ ! welcomes ext5d$ by h] little son or daught]4 ,:5 ev]yone has arriv$1 ! "y ho/ or ho/ess leads ! way into ! d9+-room & ! d9n]4 ,aft] ! d9n] !re w be games until x is "t to leave4 ,! wise ho/ess w see t all fragile bric--brac & exp5sive furniture is well out ( ! way be=e ! *ildr5 come4 ,& %e w see t z soon z a game is becom+ too boi/]\s1 or too tiresome1 ano!r is sugge/$4 ,!re mu/ be v>iety to ! ent]ta9m5t = *ildr5 gr[ we>y v quickly4 ,,ab\t ,,! ,,bir?day ,,p>ty ,if ! p>ty is 9 honor ( a *ild's bir?day1 an ef=t %\ld be made to make x z fe/ive z possible4 ,! bir?day fl[]1 :atev] x happ5s to be1 %\ld be giv5 prom95ce4 ,! table %\ld h an attractive floral c5t]piece1 & mu/ be z well-laid z ! correctly =mal d9n]-table ( ! old] folks4 ,x is cu/om>y = ! gue/s to br+ a gift = ! *ild1 b lately x has be5 =bidd5 by "s p>5ts4 ,!re is no reason to =bid x1 h[ev]1 z ! cu/om is a pretty "o & ! gifts are usually trifl+4 ,& x is z amus+ z x is pleas+ to wat* h[ pr\dly & importantly ! "y visitor be/[s 8 gifts ^u 8 comrade4 ,! bir?day cake holds ! place ( honor on ! table4 ,ar\nd ! edge ( x1 9 small t9 hold]s1 are c&les--"o = ea* ye> ! *ild has ?us f> celebrat$4 ,"o c&le is bl[n out by ea* little gue/1 & ) x goes a secret wi% ( happ9ess = ! boy or girl ^: bir?day x is4 ,"s p>5ts d n wi% to run ! risk ( accid5ts caus$ by burn+ c&les4 ,9 ?is case1 x is pretty to h ! ic+ on cake repres5t ! face ( a clock1 ) ! h\r h& po9t+ to ! h\r :i* indicates ! *ild's age4 ,v (t5 :5 ! slices ( bir?day cake are di/ribut$1 t9y gifts are pres5t$ ) !m4 ,,:5 ,,! ,,"y ,,gue/s ,,leave ,a problem :i* ! ho/ess ( *ildr5's p>ties inv>iably meets1 is h[ to get ! *ildr5 home safely4 ,und\bt$ly1 ! p>5ts ( ! "y *ildr5 %\ld provide "s means ( hav+ !m escort$ home safely aft] ! p>ty2 ! duty %\ld n be all[$ to devolve ^u ! ho/ess4 ,if ! *ildr5 are old]1 ( high-s*ool age1 ! "y boys may be tru/$ to escort ! girls to _! homes4 ,:5 *ildr5 are v "y !y h no idea :5 to leave4 ,! ho/ess may say1 ,let u h "o m game be=e y />t = home1 *ildr51 & imm$iately proce$ to expla9 :at ! game %all be1 impress+ x ^u !m t !y are expect$ to leave = home z soon z x is ov]4 ,or %e may sugge/ a f9al gr& m>* :i* ! y\ng/]s w no d\bt ent] into :ole-he>t$ly--& ! m>* may lead into ! room :]e _! wraps are wait+4 ,!re is no?+ q z beautiful & gratify+ z a gr\p ( laugh+1 happy *ildr52 & ! ho/ess :o has atta9$ ?is may inde$ feel repaid = h] tr\ble4 ,*ildr5 are easy to please1 too4 ,some?+ absurd1 some?+ ! lea/ bit out ( ! ord9>y1 some?+ que] or grotesque1 is b\nd to w9 _! imm$iate applause no matt] h[ simple & inexp5sive x may be4 ,& /rangely en\gh1 ! ho/ess :o manages to br+ ! sun%9e & m]rim5t into ! he>ts ( h] "y gue/s1 feels "y & *ildi% h]self = ! "t be+--& ! feel+ is "o ( su* utt] delight & happ9ess t x is well wor? ! ef=t4 ,,*ildr5',s ,,ent]ta9m5ts ,,away ,,f ,,home ,!re are _m delightful ways ( ent]ta9+ *ildr5 away f home1 & out-(-door p>ties are especially :olesome4 ,motion pictures p>ties = *ildr5 t are old en\gh are v pleas+ if ! picture is a good "o4 ,?is is a po9t t %\ld be c>efully att5d$ to be=eh&4 ,x is no "t to take a *ance4 ,at ! p>ty out 9 ! woods or d[n by ! bank ( ! creek refre%m5ts %\ld consi/ ( picnic f>e4 ,! motion picture p>ty or ! mat9e p>ty might be foll[$ by ice-cream or by a simple d9n]4 ,b h[ev] _m ( ^! ent]ta9m5ts "o may give "o mu/ rememb] t !re is aft] all n a great deal ( art 9 amus+ p :5 ! amusem5ts are furni%$ by someone else1 & also t ! art ( ent]ta9+ *>m+ly at home is p]haps ! greate/ art ( !m all4 ,,*ildr5 ,,& ,,danc+ ,! danc+ s*ool tea*es ! y\ng/] a great deal m ?an m]ely a few danc+ /eps4 ,f no o!r s\rce is x possible = ! "y boy or girl to acquire ! grace1 ! poise1 ! *>m ( mann] t ! danc+ s*ool imp>ts4 ,! writ] kn[s a v lovely "y miss ( twelve ye>s1 :o has s *>m+ a mann] t "o delights to be ) h]4 ,yet1 h] p>5ts confide1 t two ye>s ago %e 0 s n]v\s & fidgety t !y 7 a%am$ to take h] any:]e4 ,!y attribute h] pres5t grace & ease to h] lessons at danc+ s*ool4 ,!re is no reason :y boys %\ld n also be regi/]$ at ! danc+ s*ool4 ,a "y man :o1 9 *ildhood le>n$ ! little =malities ( ! danc+ s*ool1 w n be likely to feel ill at ease 9 ! =mal draw+-room1 or at ! elaborate d9n]4 ,he w "k h[ to conduct himself )\t emb>rassm5t or self-consci\sness4 ,9 tra9+ our *ildr5's mann]s & spee*1 we mu/ n =get t _! physical developm5t is mo/ important4 ,etiquette requires t ! *ild "k1 n only h[ to act at ! table1 h[ to greet visitors & h[ to be well-behav$ & mann]ly1 b also h[ to appe> polite & poli%$4 ,danc+ gives !m j ! "r f\ndation = grace & c\rtesy ( mann]4 ,a ,,^w ,,to ,,p>5ts ,9 y\r h&s has be5 plac$ ! de/9y ( a *ild1 or ( *ildr51 to be mold$1 develop$ & =m$ into a p]fect be+4 ,d n make ! mi/ake t s _m p>5ts make--! mi/ake ( ?9k+ t ! *ild is a m9iature ( y\rself1 a pocket edition ( y\rself z x 74 ,y h c]ta9 ta/es1 habits1 hopes & desires cultivat$ ?r\gh ye>s ( exp]i5ce & education4 ,! *ild has a "y m9d to be exp&$ & develop$1 a "y body to be mold$ into l9es ( grace & *>m1 a "y life to be made f9e & beautiful4 ,x is n an easy task1 ?is lead+ a *ild ?r\gh ! correct *annels ( e>ly life4 ,! "y m9ds are s s5sitive1 ! "y memory is s ret5tive2 evil influ5ces are s easily made1 & become s readily a "p ( ! boy's or girl's life4 ,someone once said1 ,mo!rhood is made up ( d5ial4 ,all p>5?ood is made up ( d5ial--= f ! "t ! y\ng/] fir/ op5s its eyes 9 its cradle1 ! p>5ts mu/ d5y !mselves ev]y?+ t is necess>y to make t *ild a p]fect man or woman4 ,!y mu/ give up mu* ( _! social duties to att5d to ! developm5t ( ! *ild's m9d4 ,!y mu/ sp5d h\rs ) ! y\ng/] 9 8 own or h] play1 s t !re w be wov5 9 ) t play1 a subtle tea*+4 ,!y mu/ d5y !mselves mat]ial & spiritual com=ts s t ^? ^: de/9y is 9 _! h&s1 w be correctly prep>$ to meet life4 ,!re are sev]al *apt]s to ! book ( *ildhood4 ,x is ! complete volume t c\nts--n j "o page4 ,foll[ y\r *ild ?r\gh all 8 *apt]s ( *ildhood1 ent] into 8 play & /udy & ambitions4 ,!re are s _m little incid5ts t rema9 9 ! memory & p]man5tly *ange ! behavior4 ,x is "o ?+ to be j a p>5t1 q ano!r to be p>5t & fri5d4 ,let y\r *ild see t y are int]e/$ 9 all 8 activities1 & y\r influ5ce w h a great deal to d 9 ! %ap+ ( 8 future mann]s4 ,,amusem5ts ,be z c>eful ( ! books y read z ( ! company y keep2 = y\r habits & "* w be z mu* influ5c$ by ! =m] z by ! latt]4 ,?is bit ( wisdom f ! p5 ( ,paxton ,hood reveals "o great duty :i* confronts e p>5t4 ,! *ild mu/ h its own libr>y1 & "o t w correctly develop its m9d & mann]s4 ,ev5 if x is only "o %elf ( books 9 ! nurs]y1 x %\ld belong to ! *ild itself4 ,! pride ( p]sonal own]%ip increases ! value ( ! books4 ,books %\ld be *os5 ) c>e1 b !re %\ld be suffici5t v>iety to enable ! "y boy or girl to select ! subject t he or %e is mo/ int]e/$ 94 ,fiction %\ld be ( ! bett] k9d1 ,rob9son ,crusoe1 ,little ,"l ,fauntl]oy1 ! ,jungle ,books1 ,grimm's or ,&]s5's ,fairy ,tales1 ,alice 9 ,wond]l&1 etc4 ,boys w l ,pla9 ,tales f ! ,hills1 ,bob1 ,son ( ,battle1 ,treasure ,isl&1 ,! ,sea ,wolf1 ,huckleb]ry ,f9n1 ,tw5ty ,?\s& ,leagues ,"u ! ,sea1 etc4 ,!re %\ld be special att5tion giv5 to ! classics4 ,x is un=tunate t s mu* ( ! "t devot$ to !m %\ld be sp5t altoge!r 9 ! s*oolroom = books t "o has to read are r>ely ! ones t "o likes be/4 ,dick5s1 ,?ack]ay1 ,%akespe>e1 ,george ,eliot1 & a mighty ho/ ( o!rs are wait+ = ! *ild :o is old en\gh to und]/& !m4 ,! p>5t %\ld wat* ! t5d5cies ( ! m9d ( 8 *ild & %\ld keep him suppli$ ) books t w develop & exp& ! little intellect 9 accordance ) its natural pref]5ces4 ,! be/ way to tea* a *ild to c>e = books is to keep him surr\nd$ ) !m & to read to him or tell him /ories f "t to "t & to be pati5t if he is sl[ 9 manife/+ a desire to use ! key t unlocks ! treasure t lies betwe5 ! cov]s ( books4 ,music is "o ( ! be/ means ( develop+ ! *ild's emotional nature & ( subdu+ wayw>d impulses & ( br++ ab\t h>mony 9 ! home circle4 ,! writ] kn[s ( "o family--& !re are _m o!rs--:i* sometimes 9 ! ev5+ f9ds itself all at sixes & sev5s4 ,nobody agrees ) anybody else2 ! :ole gr\p is hopelessly tangl$4 ,! "m goes to ! piano & beg9s play+ a song t !y all "k4 ,"o by "o ! memb]s ( ! family jo9 9 & x is n long be=e !y are all ga!r$ ar\nd ! piano s++ song aft] song & ! petty disagreem5ts & ! unpleasant feel+ ( discord h vani%$ into ?9 air4 ,mu* is to be said 9 favor ( ! gramophones4 ,?r\gh !m ! be/ music is accessible to almo/ ev]yone4 ,b x is n wise to dep5d on !m altoge!r1 = *ildr5 h tal5t to be develop$1 & !re is a *>m ab\t music 9 ! family t is l1 to use a crude comp>ison--home-cook+4 ,x _c be duplicat$ else:]e4 ,,let ,,! ,,*ild ,,be ,,natural ,aft] all1 ! greate/ *>m ( *ildhood is natural1 spontane\s simplicity4 ,/ilt$1 p>ty-mann]$ *ildr5 are bores4 ,!y are unnatural4 ,& t :i* is n natural1 _c be well-br$4 ,! cause ( %y1 ba%ful1 self-consci\s y\ng/]s is wrong tra9+4 ,!y are repress$ in/ead ( develop$4 ,_! natural t5d5cies are held d[n by con/ant rem9d]s & scold+s & w>n+s4 ,in/ead1 !y %\ld be br\ght out by prop] enc\ragem5t1 by k9d1 sympa!tic und]/&+4 ,"s *ildr5 h ! idea1 9 _! extreme y\?1 t p>5ts are made only to =bid ?+s1 to repress !m & make !m d ?+s aga9/ :i* _! natures revolt4 ,! bond t %\ld exi/ betwe5 p>5t & *ild is a c]ta9 und]/&+ fri5dl9ess--an implicit fai? on ! "p ( ! *ild1 & a wise guidance on ! "p ( ! p>5t4 ,rememb] t a *ild is l a fl[]4 ,if ! fl[] is n p]mitt$ to /ruggle upw>d t[>ds ! sun1 & to ga!r 9 ! t9y dewdrops1 x w )] & die4 ,if ! *ild is n all[$ to develop naturally1 its ta/es & ideals w be w>p$ & %all[4 ,tea* y\r *ild to be well-mann]$ & polite1 b d n disguise him ) unnatural mann]s & spee*4 ,,! ,,"y ,,girl ,!re are two k9ds ( "y girls--^? :o face life z "s great opportunity1 :o consid] x a spl5did gift to be made ! mo/ (1 & :o help to create ! beauty t !y love to admire2 & ^? :o are butt]flies ( society1 ^: lives are m]e husks1 )\t dep?1 )\t wor?-:ile impulses & ambitions4 ,!y are satisfi$ if !y "k h[ to dance gracefully1 if !y "k h[ to ent] a room 9 an impressive mann]1 if !y "k h[ to be *>m+ at ! d9n] table4 ,_! conv]sation is idle *att]2 _! ambitions are to be social que5s1 to e>n social di/9ction & importance4 ,=tunately1 ! tw5tie? c5tury girl is less ( a butt]fly ?an ! tight-lac$ hoop-skirt$ "y miss ( ! latt] "p ( ! n9ete5? c5tury4 ,p]haps ! w> _h some?+ to d ) x4 ,p]haps x is because s _m new occupations h be5 op5$ up to h]4 ,p]haps x is evolution4 ,b ! "y miss ( to-day is c]ta9ly m ?rill$ ) life & its possibilities ?an h] si/] ( two or ?ree decades ago ev] 04 ,life is no long] %[n to ! "y daught] z a play?+ by fond p>5ts :o plan no future except m>riage & social success = ! "y woman ^: future re/s 9 _! h&s4 ,to-day life is %[n to h] z x is %[n to h] bro!r--z some?+ beautiful1 some?+ impressive1 some?+ wor?y ( deep ?\ght & ambiti\s plan4 ,to-day ! "y girl is n only taught to dance gracefully1 to ent] a room correctly1 & to conduct h]self ) ease & *>m at ! d9n] table1 b %e is taught to develop h] natural tal5ts & abilities s t ! _w w be left a little bett] = h] hav+ liv$ 9 x4 ,h] conduct1 !re=e1 is t+$ ) a new dignity ( purpose1 a new desire to make ! be/ ( ! gift ( life4 ,in/ead ( idle *att] h] conv]sation assumes ! proportion ( intellectual discussion1 & "y m5 & wom5 to-day discuss intellig5tly problems t w\ld n h be5 m5tion$ 9 polite society a g5]ation ago4 ,x is to help ! "y girl to prep>e = ! glori\s future t awaits h] t ! foll[+ p>agraphs are writt54 ,,! ,,girl',s ,,mann]s ,!re is no?+ q z *>m+ 9 a "y girl z repose ( mann]4 ,a s(t voice1 a quiet1 cultur$ mann] is m to be admir$ ?an a pretty face1 or an elaborate g[n4 ,let ! "y girl look to ! anci5t ,greeks = inspiration4 ,"h %e w f9d ! true conception ( beauty--repose ( mann] & utt] simplicity4 ,%e w f9d t to be p]fect is to be natural1 & t "o mu/ be simple & uno/5tati\s to be beautiful 9 ! true s5se ( ! ^w4 ,aft] all1 :at c be q s lovely z beautiful mann]s8 ,& :at c be m wor?y ( admiration & respect ?an a sweet1 well-mann]$ "y girl8 ,polit5ess & c\rtesy are two o!r important virtues t ! "y girl %\ld develop4 ,%e %\ld be z polite to h] "m & si/] z %e is to /rang]s4 ,%e %\ld be c\rte\s & k9d to ev]yone4 ,& %e %\ld le>n ! art ( li/5+ z well z ! art ( conv]sation4 ,,! ,,*ap]on ,am]ican girls ) _! indep5d5t ideas ( social requirem5ts mock ! idea ( a *ap]on to ! !at] or dance4 ,& ?is is especially true ( ! _m "y wom5 :o are plann+ c>e]s = !mselves1 :o int5d to be m ?an social butt]flies4 ,we are pr\d ( ! ideal ,am]ican girl4 ,we d n mean1 ( c\rse1 ! self-e/eem$1 arrogant "y miss :o d]ides all conv5tions & calls h]self free4 ,9 h] we are n int]e/$ at all4 ,b !re is ! true ,am]ican type--! "y girl :o is ess5tially a lady1 :o has self-reliance b is n bold1 :o is firm )\t be+ ov]be>+1 :o is bra9y b n mascul9e1 :o is c\rage\s1 /rong & fe>less1 yet fem99e4 ,%e has no ne$ ( ! *ap]on2 & x is because ( h] t ! decay ( ! *ap]on has be5 s rapid 9 ,am]ica4 ,& s we f9d t ! ,am]ican girl :o is well-br$1 :o is well-mann]$ & high-pr9cipl$1 may att5d ! !at] & ! dance ) g5tlem51 un*ap]on$4 ,x is only :5 %e travels abroad or /ops at a hotel = any l5g? ( "t t social requirem5ts /ill comm& t %e be *ap]on$4 ,b ev5 !n1 ! girl :o travels on bus9ess purposes1 ne$ feel no emb>rassm5t :5 %e is alone1 if h] mann] & spee* are z poli%$ & correct z !y %\ld be4 ,,! ,,"y ,,c\ntry ,,miss ,9 ! small t[n or 9 ! c\ntry1 if a "y girl goes to a p>ty or o!r social meet+ ) a "y man1 he is1 ( c\rse1 expect$ to escort h] home aga94 ,if ! h\r is e>ly & ! family w probably /ill be up1 %e may invite him 9 if %e wi%es to d s4 ,b x is n an obligation4 ,if x is late1 %e does n invite him into ! h\se1 b %e may ask him to call4 ,9 "s sections ( ! ,unit$ ,/ates x is /ill consid]$ correct = ! "y man himself to reque/ t he be p]mitt$ to call4 ,a correspond5t has writt5 to inquire :e!r or n x is correct = a "y girl to ?ank a "y man = 8 escort j be=e leav+ him at h] own door4 ,evid5tly ! "y lady :o has writt5 has h]self be5 9 d\bt z to :e!r or n x is correct4 ,9 ?is in/ance1 circum/ances alt] cases4 ,if %e 7 a "y c\ntry miss return+ f an in=mal village function1 %e w\ld by no means (f] ?anks4 ,b if ! "y man has obvi\sly put himself to an inconv5i5ce to escort h] home1 !n x is only polite t %e (f] him "s expression ( gratitude4 ,a city girl does n ?ank h] escort1 b he on ! o!r h&1 may ?ank h] = a v pleasant aft]noon or ev5+ if he wi%es to d s4 ,,! ,,girl ,,& ,,h] ,,"m ,! "y girl %\ld foll[ h] "m's example & advice 9 all ?+s4 ,eighte5 is ! correct com+-out age = ! "y ,am]ican girl1 & until !n %e %\ld obey h] "m )\t "q4 ,%e %\ld be guid$ by h] wid] exp]i5ce1 by h] m mature k4 ,b un=tunately ?is is n always s4 ,mo!rs & daught]s are n ! pals !y ought to be4 ,rec5tly a woman 0 ask$ by a v close fri5d :y %e all[$ h] daught] to att5d ! !at] & ! dance ) a "y man :o 0 ( que/ionable "*4 ,surely y h "s influ5ce ov] h]1 ! fri5d p]si/$4 ,tell h] to avoid him4 ,b %e simply smil$ 9 a tir$ sort ( way & said1 ,i am only h] "m4 ,?is %\ld n be4 ,! "m %\ld guide h] daught] 9 all %e does1 & ! daught] %\ld be will+ to abide by h] "m's decisions4 ,o!rwise t sacr$1 beautiful fri5d%ip t c be creat$ only betwe5 a "m & daught] w nev] exi/4 ,,= ,,! ,,%y ,,& ,,self-,,consci\s ,a great _m ( u suff] f self-consci\sness4 ,we always imag9e t p are look+ at u1 talk+ ab\t u1 ridicul+ u4 ,we are nev] at ease among /rang]s1 nev] happy :5 p are ar\nd4 ,we are always emb>rass$1 %y1 ill at ease4 ,!re is a /ory told ab\t ! fam\s ,haw?orne :o 0 s %y & self-consci\s t he ran out ( ! h\se or hid himself :5ev] he saw visitors approa*+4 ,8 wife1 :o 0 also v timid & retir+ by nature1 0 left to ent]ta9 ! gue/s z be/ %e c\ld4 ,haw?orne 0 he>tily a%am$ ( himself1 b in/ead ( try+ to ov]come 8 self-consci\sness he s\ght & f\nd =getfulness 9 8 books & writ+s4 ,8 wife1 on ! o!r h&1 0 =c$ to ov]come h] natural timidity = ! sake ( h] husb& & = ! sake ( ! hospitality ( ! ,haw?orne home4 ,& because %e det]m9$ to d x1 %e soon became entirely unself-consci\s & able to conduct h]self ) ease & unconc]n ev5 among ! mo/ celebrat$ p4 ,& s y see t self-consci\sness c be ov]come4 ,!re is no reason = ! bride to feel emb>rass$ & ill at ease :5 %e is ho/ess = ! fir/ "t 9 h] new home4 ,!re is no reason = ! "y girl to feel %y & timid :5 %e is introduc$ 9 society4 ,!re is no reason = ! "y man to be self-consci\s 9 ! pres5ce ( ladies4 ,a little w p[] & a little s9c]e ef=t w bani% ?is fault =ev]4 ,,=get ,,ab\t ,,y\rself ,t is ! only way y c hope to cure y\rself ( self-consci\sness--=get ab\t y\rself6 ,!re are s _m delightful ?+s y c ?9k (1 s _m int]e/+ ?+s beyond ! selfi% little b\nd>ies ( y\r own self4 ,s5d y\r ?\ghts abroad1 s5d !m into ! univ]se to dr9k deeply ( k & le>n+1 to delve into ! wells ( pr(\nd int]e/ t surr\nd u on e side--& =get ab\t ! petty commonplaces ( life1 ! unimportant ev]yday conv5tionalities4 ,!n y w =get ab\t y\rself also1 & be=e y realize x y w be calm1 dignifi$1 unafraid4 ,all sugge/ion ( self-consci\sness w h vani%$4 ,,:y ,,! ,,%y ,,are ,,awkw>d ,:5 a bride leaves a small c\ntry place to become ! ho/ess 9 a l>ge h\se 9 a l>ge city1 %e is v likely to feel ill at ease & consci\s ( h]self4 ,naturally1 ?is makes h] awkw>d 9 h] mann]s4 ,%yness is ov]-s5sitiv5ess--a %r9k+ f obs]vation4 ,x causes u to worry ab\t :at o!rs are ?9k+ ab\t u1 & naturally x makes u morbid4 ,?us we are kept f appe>+ at our be/1 & 9 all our mann]s & actions we appe> awkw>d & n]v\s4 ,x is v necess>y to ov]come ?is fault if "o wi%es to m+le ) p ( ! be/ society4 ,orison ,swett ,m>d5 says1 ,if y are a victim ( timidity & self-depreciation1 afraid to say y\r s\l is y\r own2 if y creep ab\t ! _w z ?\gh y ?\ght y 7 tak+ up room :i* belong$ to somebody else2 if y are ba%ful1 timid1 confus$1 tongue-ti$ :5 y ought to ass]t y\rself1 say to y\rself1 ',i am a *ild ( ! ,k+ ( ,k+s4 ,i w no long] suff] ?is c[>dly timidity to rule me4 ,i am made by ! same ,creator :o made all o!r human be+s4 ,!y are my bro!rs & si/]s4 ,!re is no m reason :y ,i %\ld be afraid to express :at ,i feel or ?9k be=e !m ?an if !y 7 9 my own family4' ,! great inspirational writ] has %[n y 9 ?is little p>agraph ! way to ov]come y\r self-consci\sness--! fooli% timidity t is robb+ y ( y\r privilege ( self-ass]tion1 ( y\r ease & grace ( mann]1 ( y\r v happ9ess4 ,:5ev] y feel emb>rass$ & ill at ease 9 ! pres5ce ( /rang]s1 ?9k ( ! words ( ,m>d54 ,rememb] t y are "o ( ! *ildr5 ( ! univ]se1 t we are all bro!rs & si/]s1 & t y h z mu* "r to ass]t y\rself z any o!r man or woman 9 ! _w4 ,& :5 y f9ally d ov]come y\r timidity y w f9d t y h acquir$ a spl5did new grace & *>m ( mann]4 ,,self-,,confid5ce ,,v]sus ,,conceit ,d n h ! mi/ak5 idea t confid5ce 9 oneself1 lack ( self-consci\sness1 is conceit4 ,z a matt] ( fact1 x is mu* bett] to be %y & self-consci\s ?an to be a p]t1 aggressive egoti/4 ,! fir/ lesson to le>n1 9 y\r crusade aga9/ self-consci\sness1 is t y mu/ n be a%am$ ( y\r %yness4 ,t w make y ev5 m consci\s ( y\rself4 ,=get t y are %y4 ,or if y _c =get1 tell y\rself t x is bett] to be res]v$ & mode/ ?an to be conceit$ & aggressive4 ,d n %r9k f /rang]s1 b meet !m & talk to !m z ?\gh !y 7 y\r bro!rs1 or si/]s4 ,treat ev]yone l an equal1 b d n treat y\rself z an inf]ior4 ,self-confid5ce is :at makes success1 :e!r x is 9 ! social _w or ! bus9ess _w4 ,x 0 self-confid5ce t help$ ,edison ) ea* new inv5tion4 ,x 0 self-confid5ce t enabl$ ,madame ,m>ie ,curie1 p5niless & obscure1 to discov] radium1 ! greate/ & mo/ wond]ful metal 9 ! _w4 ,all a*ievem5t is f\nd$ on self-confid5ce--n ( ! aggressive sort1 b ( ! quiet1 calm1 unassum+ sort t is s easy to develop if "o w only try4 ,det]m9e t y w no long] all[ timidity & %yness to rule y4 ,ass]t y\rself6 ,& wat* h[ y\r mann]s improve4 ,,c\ntry ,,hospitality ,! c\ntry ho/ess mu/ n feel t %e is expect$ to ent]ta9 h] gue/s 9 city fa%ion4 ,!re is a great deal ( diff]5ce betwe5 ! facilities & conditions ( c\ntry & city life1 & social activities are consequ5tly diff]5t 9 bo? localities4 ,9 ! c\ntry !re is mu* less m+l+ ) /rang]s ?an !re is 9 ! city4 ,social ent]ta9m5ts are conf9$ v l>gely to ! home fireside4 ,!re are few clubs1 few l>ge halls & auditoriums4 ,a feel+ ( intimacy & good-fell[%ip exi/s :i* is entirely lack+ 9 l>ge cities4 ,almo/ ev]ybody kn[s ev]ybody else1 & :5 a l>ge ent]ta9m5t is giv51 ! :ole village kn[s ab\t x4 ,to attempt to emulate h] city si/] w\ld be folly = ! c\ntry ho/ess4 ,%e hasn't ! facilities nor ! natural conditions conducive to ! elaborate & /rictly =mal ent]ta9m5ts & activities ( ! city4 ,9 ! c\ntry ev]y?+ %\ld be on a simpl]1 m in=mal basis2 ! natural beauties ( ! c\ntry are c]ta9ly n compatible ) ! fa%ionable & (t5 o/5tati\s activities ( ! city4 ,,importance ,,( ,,simplicity ,we g to ! c\ntry because we are tir$ ( ! t[n & we want re/1 quiet1 peace4 ,we d n expect to f9d a fr5zi$ attempt at imitation ( city ent]ta9m5ts4 ,yet ?is is :at s _m ho/esses d--in/ead ( reta9+ ! delightful natural simplicity ( _! homes1 !y feel t !y mu/ ent]ta9 _! city fri5ds 9 city fa%ion4 ,& inv>iably !y fail4 ,v (t5 :5 a city man or woman is tir$ ( ! %am & n>r[ conv5tionalities ( city life1 he or %e w plan to visit a c\ntry fri5d4 ,if t c\ntry fri5d is wise1 he or %e w make no elaborate prep>ations1 b j greet ! fri5d ) ! simple c\ntry hospitality t is s allur+ to city p4 ,:]e 9 ! city c y f9d ! good-fell[%ip1 ! spontaneity1 ! c\rte\s k9dl9ess t y f9d 9 ! small t[n & village8 ,:]e 9 ! city c y f9d ! op5-he>t$ g5]osity1 ! sympa!tic und]/&+ & ! simple c\rtesy t y f9d among c\ntry p8 ,! elaborate ball room ) its ri*ly g[n$ wom5 is *>m+ & impressive2 b ! simple c\ntry p>ty ) its ,virg9ia reel1 ! daught]s 9 _! p>ty clo!s & mo!rs 9 _! be/ black silks are no less *>m+4 ,= ! sake ( ^? "y m5 & wom5 :o live 9 ! c\ntry & "k liv]i$ *auffeurs & uni=m$ butl]s only ?r\gh books1 = ! sake ( ^? m5 & wom5 :o live 9 ! c\ntry because !y love simplicity & ! beauties ( nature1 b = ^? :o are eag] to "k good mann]s & "k :at is correct at all times1 we are writ+ ! foll[+ p>agraph on etiquette 9 ! small t[n4 ,let u fir/ write ab\t ,,! ,,ho/ess ,:5 ent]ta9+ gue/s f ! city1 fre% fl[]s %\ld be br\ght into ! h\se e day4 ,! meal s]v$ %\ld be simple2 elaborate c\rse d9n]s are n 9 good =m :5 ! facilities ( ! ho/ess d n p]mit !m4 ,no?+ o/5tati\s %\ld be attempt$2 j simple1 homelike hospitality su* z is (f]$ ! neighbors & fri5ds ( ! village4 ,e>ly d9+ is usual 9 ! c\ntry1 especially 9 ! summ]4 ,sometimes high tea is s]v$4 ,! tea-urn is plac$ on ! table be=e ! ho/ess to give a homelike air to ! function1 & fruits & fl[]s are plac$ 9 cut glass b[ls on ! table4 ,pres]ves1 honey & cakes %\ld also be on ! table 9 cut glass or *9a di%es4 ,hot biscuits1 muff9s & waf]s are usually s]v$ at high tea1 ) "o sub/antial di% l cold *ick51 salad or cold slic$ meats4 ,hammocks1 t5nis c\rts1 r[boats1 etc41 %\ld be plac$ at ! disposal ( visit+ gue/s4 ,! consid]ate ho/ess always plans "s sort ( ent]ta9m5t = gue/s t h come a long way to visit h]1 b %e does n make any attempt to provide any?+ elaborate4 ,a simple c\ntry dance or a musicale is relax+ & ent]ta9+4 ,protection f flies1 mosquitoes1 etc4 %\ld be provid$ = gue/s4 ,if *airs & hammocks are on ! por*1 x %\ld be completely scre5$ 9 to prev5t mosquitoes f annoy+ ! gue/s4 ,x is j su* little consid]ations z ^! t make c\ntry hospitality s delightful4 ,,! ,,gue/ ,:e!r y are a gue/ f ! city1 or a fri5d f ! village1 y h a c]ta9 def9ite etiquette to obs]ve :5 y are at ! home ( a c\ntry ho/ess4 ,fir/ y mu/ make y\rself agreeable & helpful4 ,if y are f ! city1 =get ! re/rict+ =malities y h be5 accu/om$ to4 ,y may speak to ev]yone 9 ! ho/ess' draw+-room--or p>lor--ev5 ?\gh !re h be5 no introductions4 ,& if y see an eld]ly man or woman /&+ all alone 9 "o corn] ( ! room1 y c g ov] to him or h]1 />t a conv]sation1 & (f] to get a *air or an ice = ! /rang]4 ,x is n necess>y to wait = an introduction4 ,d n be dull dur+ ! aft]noon or ev5+4 ,be pleasant & agreeable2 if conv]sation lags1 /imulate x ) an int]e/+ anecdote4 ,if y c ent]ta9 9 "s way1 ei!r by s++1 play+ "s musical in/rum5t1 or recit+1 don't be backw>d ab\t (f]+ y\r s]vices4 ,rememb] y are n 9 an elaborate ball room b among simple c\ntry folks1 & if y c provide enjoyable ent]ta9m5t = !m1 !y w appreciate x j z mu* z y y\rself w enjoy x4 ,an (fi% p]son always spoils ! fun ( a c\ntry p>ty4 ,if y feel y are sup]ior to ! ,virg9ia reel & ! apple p>+ conte/s1 d n att5d4 ,move to ! city :]e y c att5d elaborate social functions4 ,b :ile y are at ! p>ty1 d y\r be/ to add to ! g5]al enjoym5t1 & d n spoil ?+s by be+ disagreeable & unpleasant4 ,x is poor ta/e to we> v fa%ionable city clo!s to a simple c\ntry ent]ta9m5t4 ,if y come f ! city1 we> some?+ simple & pretty1 b n some?+ t w make y conspicu\s4 ,if y are a man & y "k t none ( ! o!r m5 w we> full dress1 !n don't be presumptu\s en\gh to appe> 9 y\r swall[-tail4 ,b if y are a village fri5d1 y may we> y\r ,sunday be/ = und\bt$ly ev]yone else :o att5ds ! p>ty w d likewise4 ,,= ,,c\ntry ,,folks ,nev] attempt to make false impressions4 ,t is "o great fault f\nd among c]ta9 c\ntry p4 ,:5 city fri5ds call1 !y attempt to ov]awe !m ) _! sup]iority4 ,:ile ! city fri5ds are ) !m1 !y d n notice _! village fri5ds at *ur*1 nor d !y invite !m to _! h\se4 ,!y devote !mselves exclusively to _! fri5ds f ! city--& inv>iably ^? fri5ds return home disappo9t$ & disillusion$4 ,:5 p move 9 ! neighborhood1 x is consid]$ polite to pay !m ! fir/ visit--to ext5d ! h& ( welcome1 z ! expression is4 ,! ho/ess %\ld (f] a cup ( tea ) crack]s or cake1 & %\ld make h]self agreeable 9 e way4 ,h[ev]1 ! acqua9tance %\ld n be =c$2 if ! newcom]s are haughty & alo(1 x is well to leave !m to !mselves1 until !y h absorb$ "s ( ! good-fell[%ip & c\rtesy ( ! village4 ,!re is v little ne$ = =mal call+ c>ds 9 ! small village :]e ev]ybody kn[s ev]ybody else4 ,a great _m ( ! conv5tionalities ( city life are1 ( c\rse1 f\nd 9 ! c\ntry2 b a great _m m ( !m are lack+4 ,& among !m are ! /rictly =mal introductions1 calls & social functions t are obs]v$ ) su* punctili\sness 9 ! city4 ,simplicity %\ld be ! keynote ( c\ntry life1 & quiet1 dignifi$ mann]s %\ld be ! ideal ( c\ntry p4 ,,! ,,endless ,,r\nd ,,( ,,hospitality ,hospitality does n mean ! giv+ ( sumptu\s banquets or elaborate d9n]s4 ,x does n mean ! extravagant recklessness ( mu*-talk$-ab\t h\se p>ties1 or ext5d$ ya*t+ trips4 ,x does n mean ! hold+ ( gay & fe/ive balls4 ,no1 x means none ( ^!1 = ev5 9 ! mo/ humble home "o c f9d ! true/ hospitality4 ,!re ne$ be no ri* display1 no obvi\s ef=t at o/5tation4 ,= hospitality is t op5-he>t$1 op5-h&$1 g5]\s1 lovable1 beautiful fell[-feel+ = fell[-mortals--! k9d ( feel+ t makes y ?r[ op5 y\r home1 small ap>tm5t or mighty mansion1 z ! case may be1 & bid y\r fri5ds & acqua9tances welcome4 ,welcome1 m9d y1 t has 9 its greet+ none ( ! %am cordiality1 t weal?y p sometimes p>ade m]ely = ! sake ( be+ able to %[ _! worldly goods to ! envi\s eyes ( _! gue/s1--b a :ole-s\l$ & :ole-he>t$ welcome t is will+ to %>e ev]y?+ "o has4 ,& s1 ! r\nd ( hospitality goes endlessly on1 ho/ & ho/ess mak+ ! pleasure & com=t ( ! gue/ _! prime consid]ation4 ,p>ties1 receptions1 dances1 balls1 d9n]s--all are in/ances ( ! eag]ness ( ! _w1 ! social _w1 to ent]ta91 to give pleasure1 to amuse4 ,& ! gue/s1 9 _! turn1 repay ! hospitalities ) o!r hospitalities ( _! own4 ,& we f9d1 9 ?is glori\s tw5tie? c5tury x is our =tune to be liv+ 91 a :olesome1 g5]\s hospitality t puts to %ame ! hi/ory-fam$ a*ievem5ts ( k+s & pr9ces ( yore4 ,,:5 ,,to ,,invite ,! "q naturally arises1 :at are ! occasions t require hospitality8 ,frankly1 !re are no def9ite occasions4 ,hospitality is ! index to bre$+ & culture at all times4 ,b !re are c]ta9 c]emoni\s occasions t w>rant ! invit$ hospitality--& su* are ! occasions t we w /udy 9 ?is *apt]4 ,fir/1 we f9d ! w$d+ anniv]s>y claim+ ! c]emony ( _m invit$ gue/s & mu* fe/ive ent]ta9m5t4 ,?us1 w$d+ anniv]s>ies (f] an excell5t opportunity = hospitality4 ,!n !re is ! occasion ( ! "y daught]'s introduction to society--an ev5t :i* is important1 inde$1 & requires ! utmo/ hospitality on ! "p ( ho/ & ho/ess alike4 ,:5 "o's son graduates f college1 a little d9n] p>ty & p]haps "s musical ent]ta9m5t aft]w>d is an appropriate "t to %[ by "o's hospitality1 s9c]e gratitude = ! spl5did educational opportunities af=d$ ! y\? ( ,am]ica4 ,oh1 !re are c\ntless opportunities1 c\ntless excuses1 if y w call x t1 c\ntless occasions :5 hospitality c be %[n to "o's fri5ds & acqua9tances6 ,& x is only by tak+ advantage ( ^! opportunities1 by reveal+ "o's unselfi%1 ungrudg+ hospitality1 t "o rightly e>ns ! "n ( cultur$4 ,! ho/ess :o sighs 9 relief :5 ! gue/ has dep>t$ is n truly hospitable4 ,%e %\ld h a c]ta9 s5se ( satisfaction 9 ! k ( h] v we>9ess4 ,= hasn't %e s]v$ h] gue/s well8 ,hasn't %e s5t !m to _! homes a little happi] ?an :5 !y fir/ came8 ,! sigh %\ld be "o ( %e] joy4 ,no "o invites gue/s to 8 or h] home to make !m unhappy4 ,!re=e1 if among y\r fri5ds y numb] "o ^: worldly goods are v mu* less ?an y\r own1 d n invite him or h] to a fa%ionable ball :]e ri* display w make him feel sadly out ( place4 ,r save ! invitation = a quiet1 aft]noon tea4 ,& on ! o!r h&1 if y are unable to c>e = ! wants & com=ts ( sev]al gue/s1 d n invite !m to h\se p>ties4 ,be hospitable--b above all use good s5se & good judgm5t be=e y invite4 ,,! ,,gue/s ,,& ,,_! ,,duties ,! fact t ,am]ica is ! home ( hospitality & l& ( ! mo/ g5]\s ho/esses1 does n indicate necess>ily t ! gue/1 9 8 selfi%ness1 %\ld take advantage ( x4 ,a well-br$1 consid]ate p]son always seeks to m9imize z f> z possible ! ef=ts ( 8 or h] ho/ess1 & to make ! visit or /ay pleasant4 ,%e1 or he1 con/antly endeavors to aid ! ho/ess 9 provid+ ent]ta9m5t4 ,9 %ort1 he returns ! hospitality ( ! ho/ & ho/ess1 ) a hospitality ( 8 own--a hospitality t1 9 itsconsid]ation & reg>d = ! rights ( o!rs1 is "o ( ! beautiful ?+s t makes life wor? ! liv+4 ,x is sup]b--?is giv+ & return+ ( hospitality3 ,we f9d a worri$1 anxi\s bus9ess man1 =gett+ = ! mom5t 8 press+ affairs 9 ! div]t+ ent]ta9m5ts provid$ = him by 8 ho/ess2 9 return1 ex]t+ e ef=t to contribute to ! success ( ! ev5+1 to jo9 9 ! conv]sation :5 he w\ld r be sil5t & p5sive1 to be witty & humor\s :5 he w\ld mu* pref] be+ moody & despond5t4 ,& s x goes on1 a con/ant giv+ & return+ ( hospitality1 s beautiful & s inspir+ t x is wor?y ( ! /ress giv5 to x 9 ! social _w4 ,!re are "s p>am\nt obligations :i* ! gue/ mu/ obs]ve4 ,among !m1 p]haps mo/ exact+1 is punctuality4 ,to keep o!rs wait+1 to be cont9ually t>dy1 is to demon/rate "o's rud5ess & want ( good bre$+4 ,promptness 9 reg>d to ! answ]+ ( invitations1 punctuality 9 att5d+ d9n]s1 lun*eons & p>ties ( any k9d1--^! are m>ks ( good bre$+4 ,if "o is invit$ to a dance or p>ty & does n wi% to att5d )\t an out-(-t[n fri5d :o happ5s to be /opp+ ) him or h] at ! "t--a fri5d :o c]ta9ly _c be des]t$ on ! aft]noon or ev5+ ( ! occasion--x is p]missible to write a cordial note to ! ho/ess expla9+ ! situation & reque/+ t an invitation be ext5d$ to ! fri5d4 ,h[ev]1 no res5tm5t %\ld be felt if ! ho/ess f9ds %e mu/ refuse ! reque/2 = %e may h _h to refuse "s ( h] own fri5ds on acc\nt ( conditions beyond h] control4 ,b no gue/ may br+ to a p>ty1 dance or d9n]1 a fri5d or acqua9tance :o has n be5 invit$4 ,?is is consid]$ a brea* ( etiquette1 & ! ho/ess is n inhospitable :5 %e does n invite t p>ticul> gue/ aga94 ,! gue/ mu/ con=m 9 all ?+s to ! ta/es & cu/oms ( 8 ho/ & ho/ess4 ,he mu/ f9d 7or feign7 enjoym5t 9 ev]y?+ t is propos$ by !m1 ev]y?+ t is (f]$ by !m 9 ! way ( ent]ta9m5t4 ,9 tak+ leave ( ! ho/ess x is necess>y to ?ank h] cordially4 ,criticisms1 ei!r ( ! conduct ( "s o!r gue/1 or ( s]vants1 are poor =m & %\ld be avoid$4 ,! ideal gue/ is ! "o :o has t ease & poise ( mann]1 t calmness & k9dness ( temp]1 t lov+ & lovable disposition t makes p someh[ want to talk to & be ) him4 ,su* a gue/ ne$s no set ( rules--inh]5tly he kn[s ! laws ( good conduct & f9e mann]s2 he is ! boon ( ho/s & ho/esses ! _w ov]4 ,,executives ,,( ,,/ate ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,address+ ,salutation,salutation,clos+ ,clos+ ,title ,envelope ,=mal ,in=mal ,=mal ,in=mal ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,presid5t ,presid5t ,sir ,my de> ,i h ! ,i h ! ( ,calv9 ,mr4 honor to honor to ,unit$ ,coolidge ,presid5t rema9 y\r rema9 mo/ ,/ates mo/ respectfully ob$i5t 7s9c]ely7 s]vant y\rs ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,vice- ,! ,vice- ,sir or ,my de> ,i h1 sir1 ,i h ! ,presid5t ,presid5t ,de> ,sir ,john ,doe ! honor to honor to ,john ,doe rema9 y\r rema9 mo/ ob$i5t respectfully s]vant 7s9c]ely7 y\rs ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,cab9et ,hon4 or ,sir or ,my de> ,i h1 sir1 ,i h ! ,memb] ,honorable ,de> ,sir ,hub]t ! honor to honor to ,hub]t ,"w1 ,"w rema9 y\r rema9 mo/ ,secret>y ( ob$i5t respectfully ,int]ior1 s]vant 7s9c]ely7 etc4 y\rs ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,s5ator ,s5ator ,sir or ,my de> ,i h1 sir1 ,believe ,william ,m4 ,de> ,sir ,s5ator ! honor to me1 mo/ ,cald] or ,cald] rema9 y\r s9c]ely ,honorable ob$i5t y\rs ,william ,m4 s]vant ,cald] ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,memb] ( ,honorable ,sir or ,my de> ,i h1 sir1 ,believe ,h\se ( ,rob]t ,c4 ,de> ,sir ,mr4 ,bacon ! honor to me1 mo/ ,repres5- ,bacon rema9 y\r s9c]ely tatives ob$i5t y\rs s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,ju/ice ,mr4 ,ju/ice ,sir or ,de> ,i h1 sir1 ,believe ( ,supreme,h4 ,taft1 or ,de> ,sir ,ju/ice ! honor to me1 mo/ ,c\rt ,! ,hon4 ,h4 ,taft rema9 y\r s9c]ely ,taft ,ju/ice ob$i5t y\rs ( ,supreme s]vant ,c\rt ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,gov]nor ,gov]nor ,sir or ,de> ,i h1 sir1 ,believe ( ,/ate ,alfr$ ,e4 ,de> ,sir ,gov]nor ! honor to me1 mo/ ,smi? ,smi?1 or rema9 y\r s9c]ely ,de> ,mr4 ob$i5t y\rs ,smi? s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,mayor ( ,8 ,honor ,sir or ,my de> ,i h1 sir1 ,believe ,city ! ,mayor ( ,de> ,sir ,mayor ! honor to me1 mo/ ,new ,york1 rema9 y\r s9c]ely ,john ,f4 ob$i5t y\rs ,hylan s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,,*ur* ,,dignit>ies ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,address+ ,salutation,salutation,clos+ ,clos+ ,title ,envelope ,=mal ,in=mal ,=mal ,in=mal ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,ar*bi%op,! ,mo/ ,my ,"l ,my de> ,i rema91 my ,i h ,anglican ,rev]5d1 ,ar*bi%op,"l ,"l honor to ,*ur* ,8 ,grace ,may x ,ar*bi%op,ar*bi%op1 rema9 ! ,please y\r my de> ,ar*bi%op ,y\r ,grace's ,ar*bi%op ( ,york ,grace ob$i5t s]vamt ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,anglican ,to ! ,"r ,my ,"l ,my de> ,i h ,i h ,bi%op ,rev]5d1 ,"l honor to honor to ! ,"l ,bi%op rema9 y\r rema91 ,bi%op ( ,lord%ip's my de> ,k5t ob$i5t ,"l s]vamt ,bi%op1 fai?fully y\rs ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,roman ,! ,mo/ ,mo/ ,mo/ ,i h ! ,i h ! ,ca?olic ,rev]5d ,john,rev]5d ,rev]5d honor to honor to ,ar*bi%op,g4 ,mc,caular1 & de> & de> rema9 y\r rema9 y\r ,ar*bi%op ,sir ,sir humble humble ( ,newgate s]vant s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,c>d9al ,8 ,em95ce1,y\r ,y\r ,i h ! ,i h ! ,c>d9al ,em95ce ,em95ce honor to honor to ,newton or ,de> rema9 y\r rema9 y\r ,c>d9al humble humble ,newton s]vant s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,roman ,to ! ,"r ,"r ,my de> ,i h ! ,i h ! ,ca?olic ,rev]5d ,rev]5d ,bi%op honor to honor to ,bi%op ,joseph ,f4 & de> ,:ite rema9 y\r rema9 y\r ,:ite1 ,sir humble humble ,bi%op ( s]vant s]vant ,massa*usetts ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,prote/ant,"r ,"r ,de> ,i h ! ,i h ! ,bi%op ,rev]5d ,rev]5d ,bi%op honor to honor to ,edw>d ,f4 & de> ,conroy rema9 y\r rema9 y\r ,conroy1 ,sir ob$i5t ob$i5t ,bi%op ( s]vant1 or s]vant1 or ,new ,j]sey ,i rema9 ,i rema9 respectfully respectfully 7s9c]ely7 7s9c]ely7 y\rs y\rs ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,roman ,! ,rev]5d ,rev]5d ,de> ,i beg to ,ca?olic ,james ,g4 ,hill& de> ,fa!r rema91 v ,prie/ or 7) ,d4,d47 ,sir ,hill 7to s9c]ely ,prote/antor ,rev]5d ,ca?olic7 ,m9i/] ,doctor ,hill ,de> ,doctor or ,mr4 ,hill 7to ,prot- e/ant7 ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,rabbi ,dr4 ,f4 ,g4 ,de> ,sir ,de> ,dr4 ,i beg to ,krauss ,krauss rema91 ,y\rs s9c]ely ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,,royalty ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,address+ ,salutation,salutation,clos+ ,clos+ ,title ,envelope ,=mal ,in=mal ,=mal ,in=mal ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,k+ or ,to ,8 7,h]7 ,sir 7or ,de> 7or ,i h ! ,que5 ,mo/ ,graci\s,madam71 ,honor$7 honor to ,maje/y ,k+ ,may x ,sir 7or rema9 y\r ,george 7,que5please ,madam7 ,maje/y's ,m>y7 y\r mo/ ,maje/y ob$i5t s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,royal ,to ,8 7,h]7 ,sir ,de> ,sir ,i h ! ,y\r ,royal ,pr9ce or ,royal 7,madam71 ,de> ,madamhonor to ,highness' ,pr9cess ,highness1 ,may x rema9 y\r mo/ ! ,pr9ce (please ,royal ob$i5t ,wales 7or y\r ,highness' s]vant ,pr9cess ,highness humble ,m>y7 s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,duke & ,to ,8 7,h]7 ,my ,"l ,my de> ,i h ! ,believe ,du*ess ,grace1 ! 7,madam71 ,duke honor to me1 de> ,duke ( ,may x ,my de> rema9 y\r ,duke ,devon%ire please ,du*ess ,grace's mo/ 7,du*ess7 7or ,du*ess y\r ,grace ob$i5t y\rs v ( s]vant s9c]ely ,devon%ire7 ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,d[ag] ,to ,h] ,grace1,madam1 ,may,my de> ,i h ! ,believe ,du*ess ! ,d[ag] x please ,du*ess honor to me1 de> ,du*ess ( y\r ,grace7,in=mal7rema9 y\r ,du*ess1 ,devon%ire1 ,grace's mo/ y\rs v or ,to ,h] ob$i5t s9c]ely ,grace1 ,anne1 s]vant ,du*ess ( ,devon%ire ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,m>quis ,to ! ,my ,"l ,my de> ,believe me1 ,believe me1 ,m>*ion- ,m>quis ( ,m>quis ,"l ,fife ,"l 7,lady7 ,"l 7,lady7 ess ,fife1 ,to ! ,madam ,de> ,lady ,fife1 v ,fife1 v ,m>*ioness ,fife s9c]ely s9c]ely ( ,fife y\rs y\rs ,to ! ,mo/ ,noble ,m>quis ( ,fife1 ,to ! ,mo/ ,noble ,m>*ioness ( ,fife ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,d[ag] ,to ! ,madam ,de> ,lady ,believe me1 ,believe me1 ,m>*ion- ,d[ag]1 ,fife ,lady ,fife1 ,lady ,fife1 ess ,m>*ioness v v ( ,fife1 ,to s9c]ely s9c]ely ,m>y1 y\rs y\rs ,m>*ioness ( ,fife ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,y\ng] ,to ! ,"r ,my ,"l ,my de> ,i h ! ,believe me1 son & ,honorable1 ,"l ,jameshonor to ,my de> wife ( ! ,"l ,grey1 rema9 y\r ,"l 7,lady7 a ,duke or ,james ,grey1 ,de> ,lady 7,lady%ip's7 ,grey1 ,m>quis ,to ! ,"r ,james ,greyob$i5t fai?fully ,honorable1 s]vant y\rs ! ,lady ,james ,grey ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,daught] ,"r ,hon4 ,madam ,de> ,lady ,i h ! ,believe me1 ( ,duke1 ! ,lady ,janet honor to de> ,lady ,m>*ion- ,janet ,gregory rema9 y\r ,janet1 v ess or 7,in=mal7 ,lord%ip's fai?fully ,e>l ,to ! ,lady 7,lady%ip's7 y\rs ,janet ,gregory ob$i5t s]vant ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,e>l ,"r ,my ,"l ,de> ,"l ,believe me1 my de> ,"l ,c\ntess ,honorable 7,madam7 ,k5t 7,lady7 ,k5t1 s9c]ely ! ,e>l ( ,de> ,lady y\rs ,k5t1 ,k5t ,c\ntess ( ,k5t ---------------------------------------- ----------------------------- ,visc\nt ,"r ,my ,"l ,de> ,"l ,believe me1 my de> ,"l ,visc\nt- ,honorable 7,madam7 7,lady7 7,lady7 ,k5t1 s9c]ely ess ,visc\nt y\rs 7,visc\ntess7 ,grey or ,to ,visc\nt ,grey ,to ,visc\nt- ess ,grey ---------------------------------------- ----------------------------- ,b>on ,"r ,my ,"l ,de> ,"l ,believe me1 my de> ,"l ,b>oness ,honorable 7,madam7 7,lady7 7,lady7 ,k5t1 s9c]ely ! ,b>on y\rs ,:iteside1 ,! ,"r ,honorable ! ,b>oness ,:iteside ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,y\ng] ,to ! ,sir1 ,de> ,de> ,mr4 ,i h ! ,believe me1 son & ,honorable ,sir ,w>wick honor to de> ,mr4 ,wife ( ,james 7,madam1 ,de> ,mrs4 rema9 y\r or ,mrs4 ,e>l1 ,w>wick1 ,to ,de> ,w>wick ob$i5t ,w>wick1 ,visc\nt ! ,honorable,madam7 s]vant s9c]ely or ,b>on ,mrs4 ,w>wick y\rs ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------- ,daught] ,to ! ,de> ,madam,de> ,miss ,believe me1 s9c]ely ( ,honorable ,grey y\rs ,visc\nt ,miss ,grey or ,b>on ---------------------------------------- ----------------------------- ,b>onet ,to ,sir ,james ,sir ,de> ,sir ,believe me1 de> ,sir ,lady ,grey1 ,b>t4 ,madam ,james ,james1 fai?fully ,to ,lady ,grey y\rs ,grey ,de> ,lady ,believe me1 de> ,grey ,lady ,grey1 fai?fully y\rs ---------------------------------------- ----------------------------- ,knight ,sir ,james ,sir ,de> ,sir ,believe me1 de> ,sir ,lady ,grey1 ,madam ,james ,james1 fai?fully ,lady ,james ,de> ,lady y\rs ,grey ,grey ,believe me1 de> ,lady ,grey fai?fully y\rs ---------------------------------------- -----------------------------