,,essays ,,of ,,michel ,,de ,,montaigne ,translated by ,charles ,cotton ,edited by ,william ,carew ,hazilitt #ahgg ,,contents ,,of ,,volume #ae4 ,v4 ,upon ,some verses of ,virgil4 ,,chapter ,v ,,upon ,,some ,,verses ,,of ,,virgil ,,chapter ,v4 ,by how much profitable thoughts are more full and solid1 by so much are they also more cumbersome and heavy3 vice1 death1 poverty1 diseases1 are grave and grievous subjects4 ,a man should have his soul instructed in the means to sustain and to contend with evils1 and in the rules of living and believing well3 and often rouse it up1 and exercise it in this noble study2 but in an ordinary soul it must be by intervals and with moderation2 it will otherwise grow besotted if continually intent upon it4 ,i found it necessary1 when ,i was young1 to put myself in mind and solicit myself to keep me to my duty2 gaiety and health do not1 they say1 so well agree with those grave and serious meditations3 ,i am at present in another state3 the conditions of age but too much put me in mind1 urge me to wisdom1 and preach to me4 ,from the excess of sprightliness ,i am fallen into that of severity1 which is much more troublesome2 and for that reason ,i now and then suffer myself purposely a little to run into disorder1 and occupy my mind in wanton and youthful thoughts1 wherewith it diverts itself4 ,i am of late but too reserved1 too heavy1 and too ripe2 years every day read to me lectures of coldness and temperance4 ,this body of mine avoids disorder and dreads it2 'tis now my body's turn to guide my mind towards reformation2 it governs1 in turn1 and more rudely and imperiously than the other2 it lets me not an hour alone1 sleeping or waking1 but is always preaching to me death1 patience1 and repentance4 ,i now defend myself from temperance1 as ,i have formerly done from pleasure2 it draws me too much back1 and even to stupidity4 ,now ,i will be master of myself1 to all intents and purposes2 wisdom has its excesses1 and has no less need of moderation than folly4 ,therefore1 lest ,i should wither1 dry up1 and overcharge myself with prudence1 in the intervals and truces my infirmities allow me3 ,mens intenta suis ne seit usque malis4 ,that my mind may not eternally be intent upon my ills4 --,ovid41 ,trist41 iv4 i1 #d4 ,i gently turn aside1 and avert my eyes from the stormy and cloudy sky ,i have before me1 which1 thanks be to ,god1 ,i regard without fear1 but not without meditation and study1 and amuse myself in the remembrance of my better years3 ,animus quo perdidit1 optat1 ,atque in praeterita se totus imagine versat4 ,the mind wishes to have what it has lost1 and throws itself wholly into memories of the past4--,petronius1 c4 #abh4 ,let childhood look forward and age backward2 was not this the signification of ,janus' double face8 ,let years draw me along if they will1 but it shall be backward2 as long as my eyes can discern the pleasant season expired1 ,i shall now and then turn them that way2 though it escape from my blood and veins1 ,i shall not1 however1 root the image of it out of my memory3 ,hoc est ,vivere bis1 vita posse priore frui4 ',tis to live twice to be able to enjoy one's former life again4 --,martial1 x4 #bc1 #g4 ,plato ordains that old men should be present at the exercises1 dances1 and sports of young people1 that they may rejoice in others for the activity and beauty of body which is no more in themselves1 and call to mind the grace and comeliness of that flourishing age2 and wills that in these recreations the honour of the prize should be given to that young man who has most diverted the company4 ,i was formerly wont to mark cloudy and gloomy days as extraordinary2 these are now my ordinary days2 the extraordinary are the clear and bright2 ,i am ready to leap for joy1 as for an unwonted favour1 when nothing happens me4 ,let me tickle myself1 ,i cannot force a poor smile from this wretched body of mine2 ,i am only merry in conceit and in dreaming1 by artifice to divert the melancholy of age2 but1 in faith1 it requires another remedy than a dream4 ,a weak contest of art against nature4 ',tis great folly to lengthen and anticipate human incommodities1 as every one does2 ,i had rather be a less while old than be old before ,i am really so4' ,i seize on even the least occasions of pleasure ,i can meet4 ,i know very well1 by hearsay1 several sorts of prudent pleasures1 effectually so1 and glorious to boot2 but opinion has not power enough over me to give me an appetite to them4 ,i covet not so much to have them magnanimous1 magnificent1 and pompous1 as ,i do to have them sweet1 facile1 and ready3 ,a natura discedimus2 populo nos damus1 nullius rei bono auctori4 ,we depart from nature and give ourselves to the people1 who understand nothing4--,seneca1 ,ep41 #ii4 ,my philosophy is in action1 in natural and present practice1 very little in fancy3 what if ,i should take pleasure in playing at cob-nut or to whip a top6 ,non ponebat enim rumores ante salutem4 ,he did not sacrifice his health even to rumours4 ,ennius1 apud ,cicero1 ,de ,offic41 i4 #bd ,pleasure is a quality of very little ambition2 it thinks itself rich enough of itself without any addition of repute2 and is best pleased where most retired4 ,a young man should be whipped who pretends to a taste in wine and sauces2 there was nothing which1 at that age1 ,i less valued or knew3 now ,i begin to learn2 ,i am very much ashamed on't2 but what should ,i do8 ,i am more ashamed and vexed at the occasions that put me upon't4 ',tis for us to dote and trifle away the time1 and for young men to stand upon their reputation and nice punctilios2 they are going towards the world and the world's opinion2 we are retiring from it3 ,sibi arma1 sibi equos1 sibi hastas1 sibi clavam1 sibi pilam1 sibi natationes1 et cursus habeant3 nobis senibus1 ex lusionibus multis1 talos relinquant et tesseras2 ,let them reserve to themselves arms1 horses1 spears1 clubs1 tennis1 swimming1 and races2 and of all the sports leave to us old men cards and dice4--,cicero1 ,de ,senec41 c4 #af4 the laws themselves send us home4 ,i can do no less in favour of this wretched condition into which my age has thrown me than furnish it with toys to play withal1 as they do children2 and1 in truth1 we become such4 ,both wisdom and folly will have enough to do to support and relieve me by alternate services in this calamity of age3 ,misce stultitiam consiliis brevem4 ,mingle with counsels a brief interval of folly4 --,horace1 ,od41 iv4 #ab1 #bg4 ,i accordingly avoid the lightest punctures2 and those that formerly would not have rippled the skin1 now pierce me through and through3 my habit of body is now so naturally declining to ill3 ,in fragili corpore odiosa omnis offensio est2 ,in a fragile body every shock is obnoxious4 --,cicero1 ,de ,senec41 c4 #ah4 ,mensque pati durum sustinet aegra nihil4 ,and the infirm mind can bear no difficult exertion4 --,ovid1 ,de ,ponto41 i4 #e1 #ah4 ,i have ever been very susceptibly tender as to offences3 ,i am much more tender now1 and open throughout4 ,et minimae vires frangere quassa valent4 ,and little force suffices to break what was cracked before4 --,ovid1 ,de ,tris41 iii4 #aa1 #bb4 ,my judgment restrains me from kicking against and murmuring at the inconveniences that nature orders me to endure1 but it does not take away my feeling them3 ,i1 who have no other thing in my aim but to live and be merry1 would run from one end of the world to the other to seek out one good year of pleasant and jocund tranquillity4 ,a melancholic and dull tranquillity may be enough for me1 but it benumbs and stupefies me2 ,i am not contented with it4 ,if there be any person1 any knot of good company in country or city1 in ,france or elsewhere1 resident or in motion1 who can like my humour1 and whose humours ,i can like1 let them but whistle and ,i will run and furnish them with essays in flesh and bone3 ,seeing it is the privilege of the mind to rescue itself from old age1 ,i advise mine to it with all the power ,i have2 let it meanwhile continue green1 and flourish if it can1 like mistletoe upon a dead tree4 ,but ,i fear 'tis a traitor2 it has contracted so strict a fraternity with the body that it leaves me at every turn1 to follow that in its need4 ,i wheedle and deal with it apart in vain2 ,i try in vain to wean it from this correspondence1 to no effect2 quote to it ,seneca and ,catullus1 and ladies and royal masques2 if its companion have the stone1 it seems to have it too2 even the faculties that are most peculiarly and properly its own cannot then perform their functions1 but manifestly appear stupefied and asleep2 there is no sprightliness in its productions1 if there be not at the same time an equal proportion in the body too4 ,our masters are to blame1 that in searching out the causes of the extraordinary emotions of the soul1 besides attributing it to a divine ecstasy1 love1 martial fierceness1 poesy1 wine1 they have not also attributed a part to health3 a boiling1 vigorous1 full1 and lazy health1 such as formerly the verdure of youth and security1 by fits1 supplied me withal2 that fire of sprightliness and gaiety darts into the mind flashes that are lively and bright beyond our natural light1 and of all enthusiasms the most jovial1 if not the most extravagant4 ,it is1 then1 no wonder if a contrary state stupefy and clog my spirit1 and produce a contrary effect3 ,ad nullum consurgit opus1 cum corpore languet2 ,when the mind is languishing1 the body is good for nothing4 7,or37 ,it rises to no effort2 it languishes with the body4 --,pseudo ,gallus1 i4 #abe4 and yet would have me obliged to it for giving1 as it wants to make out1 much less consent to this stupidity than is the ordinary case with men of my age4 ,let us1 at least1 whilst we have truce1 drive away incommodities and difficulties from our commerce3 ,dum licet1 obducta solvatur fronte senectus3 ,whilst we can1 let us banish old age from the brow4 --,herod41 ,ep41 xiii4 #g4 ,tetrica sunt amcenanda jocularibus4 ,sour things are to be sweetened with those that are pleasant4 --,sidonius ,apollin41 ,ep41 i4 #i4 ,i love a gay and civil wisdom1 and fly from all sourness and austerity of manners1 all repellent1 mien being suspected by me3 ,tristemque vultus tetrici arrogantiam3 ,the arrogant sadness of a crabbed face4--,auctor ,incert4 ,et habet tristis quoque turba cinaedos4 ,and the dull crowd also has its voluptuaries4 7,or37 ,an austere countenance sometimes covers a debauched mind4 --,idem4 ,i am very much of ,plato's opinion1 who says that facile or harsh humours are great indications of the good or ill disposition of the mind4 ,socrates had a constant countenance1 but serene and smiling1 not sourly austere1 like the elder ,crassus1 whom no one ever saw laugh4 ,virtue is a pleasant and gay quality4 ,i know very well that few will quarrel with the licence of my writings1 who have not more to quarrel with in the licence of their own thoughts3 ,i conform myself well enough to their inclinations1 but ,i offend their eyes4 ',tis a fine humour to strain the writings of ,plato1 to wrest his pretended intercourses with ,phaedo1 ,dion1 ,stella1 and ,archeanassa3 ,non pudeat dicere1 quod non pudet sentire4 ,let us not be ashamed to speak what we are not ashamed to think4 ,i hate a froward and dismal spirit1 that slips over all the pleasures of life and seizes and feeds upon misfortunes2 like flies1 that cannot stick to a smooth and polished body1 but fix and repose themselves upon craggy and rough places1 and like cupping-glasses1 that only suck and attract bad blood4 ,as to the rest1 ,i have enjoined myself to dare to say all that ,i dare to do2 even thoughts that are not to be published1 displease me2 the worst of my actions and qualities do not appear to me so evil as ,i find it evil and base not to dare to own them4 ,every one is wary and discreet in confession1 but men ought to be so in action2 the boldness of doing ill is in some sort compensated and restrained by the boldness of confessing it4 ,whoever will oblige himself to tell all1 should oblige himself to do nothing that he must be forced to conceal4 ,i wish that this excessive licence of mine may draw men to freedom1 above these timorous and mincing virtues sprung from our imperfections1 and that at the expense of my immoderation ,i may reduce them to reason4 ,a man must see and study his vice to correct it2 they who conceal it from others1 commonly conceal it from themselves2 and do not think it close enough1 if they themselves see it3 they withdraw and disguise it from their own consciences3 ,quare vitia sua nemo confitetur8 ,quia etiam nunc in illia est2 somnium narrare vigilantis est4 ,why does no man confess his vices8 because he is yet in them2 'tis for a waking man to tell his dream4--,seneca1 ,ep41 #ec4 ,the diseases of the body explain themselves by their increase2 we find that to be the gout which we called a rheum or a strain2 the diseases of the soul1 the greater they are1 keep1 themselves the most obscure2 the most sick are the least sensible2 therefore it is that with an unrelenting hand they most often1 in full day1 be taken to task1 opened1 and torn from the hollow of the heart4 ,as in doing well1 so in doing ill1 the mere confession is sometimes satisfaction4 ,is there any deformity in doing amiss1 that can excuse us from confessing ourselves8 ,it is so great a pain to me to dissemble1 that ,i evade the trust of another's secrets1 wanting the courage to disavow my knowledge4 ,i can keep silent1 but deny ,i cannot without the greatest trouble and violence to myself imaginable to be very secret1 a man must be so by nature1 not by obligation4 ',tis little worth1 in the service of a prince1 to be secret1 if a man be not a liar to boot4 ,if he who asked ,thales the ,milesian whether he ought solemnly to deny that he had committed adultery1 had applied himself to me1 ,i should have told him that he ought not to do it2 for ,i look upon lying as a worse fault than the other4 ,thales advised him quite contrary1 bidding him swear to shield the greater fault by the less2 ,montaigne's memory here serves him ill1 for the question being put to ,thales1 his answer was3 ,but is not perjury worse than adultery8--,diogenes ,laertius1 in vita1 i4 #cf4 nevertheless1 this counsel was not so much an election as a multiplication of vice4 ,upon which let us say this in passing1 that we deal liberally with a man of conscience when we propose to him some difficulty in counterpoise of vice2 but when we shut him up betwixt two vices1 he is put to a hard choice as ,origen was either to idolatrise or to suffer himself to be carnally abused by a great ,ethiopian slave they brought to him4 ,he submitted to the first condition1 and wrongly1 people say4 ,yet those women of our times are not much out1 according to their error1 who protest they had rather burden their consciences with ten men than one mass4 ,if it be indiscretion so to publish one's errors1 yet there is no great danger that it pass into example and custom2 for ,ariston said1 that the winds men most fear are those that lay them open4 ,we must tuck up this ridiculous rag that hides our manners3 they send their consciences to the stews1 and keep a starched countenance3 even traitors and assassins espouse the laws of ceremony1 and there fix their duty4 ,so that neither can injustice complain of incivility1 nor malice of indiscretion4 ',tis pity but a bad man should be a fool to boot1 and that outward decency should palliate his vice3 this rough-cast only appertains to a good and sound wall1 that deserves to be preserved and whited4 ,in favour of the ,huguenots1 who condemn our auricular and private confession1 ,i confess myself in public1 religiously and purely3 ,st4 ,augustin1 ,origeti1 and ,hippocrates have published the errors of their opinions2 ,i1 moreover1 of my manners4 ,i am greedy of making myself known1 and ,i care not to how many1 provided it be truly2 or to say better1 ,i hunger for nothing2 but ,i mortally hate to be mistaken by those who happen to learn my name4 ,he who does all things for honour and glory1 what can he think to gain by shewing himself to the world in a vizor1 and by concealing his true being from the people8 ,praise a humpback for his stature1 he has reason to take it for an affront3 if you are a coward1 and men commend you for your valour1 is it of you they speak8 ,they take you for another4 ,i should like him as well who glorifies himself in the compliments and congees that are made him as if he were master of the company1 when he is one of the least of the train4 ,archelaus1 king of ,macedon1 walking along the street1 somebody threw water on his head1 which they who were with him said he ought to punish3 ,aye1 but1 said he1 whoever it was1 he did not throw the water upon me1 but upon him whom he took me to be4 ,socrates being told that people spoke ill of him1 ,not at all1 said he1 there is nothing1 in me of what they say4 ,for my part1 if any one should recommend me as a good pilot1 as being very modest or very chaste1 ,i should owe him no thanks2 and so1 whoever should call me traitor1 robber1 or drunkard1 ,i should be as little concerned4 ,they who do not rightly know themselves1 may feed themselves with false approbations2 not ,i1 who see myself1 and who examine myself even to my very bowels1 and who very well know what is my due4 ,i am content to be less commended1 provided ,i am better known4 ,i may be reputed a wise man in such a sort of wisdom as ,i take to be folly4 ,i am vexed that my ,essays only serve the ladies for a common piece of furniture1 and a piece for the hall2 this chapter will make me part of the water-closet4 ,i love to traffic with them a little in private2 public conversation is without favour and without savour4 ,in farewells1 we oftener than not heat our affections towards the things we take leave of2 ,i take my last leave of the pleasures of this world3 these are our last embraces4 ,but let us come to my subject3 what has the act of generation1 so natural1 so necessary1 and so just1 done to men1 to be a thing not to be spoken of without blushing1 and to be excluded from all serious and moderate discourse8 ,we boldly pronounce kill1 rob1 betray1 and that we dare only to do betwixt the teeth4 ,is it to say1 the less we expend in words1 we may pay so much the more in thinking8 ,for it is certain that the words least in use1 most seldom written1 and best kept in1 are the best and most generally known3 no age1 no manners1 are ignorant of them1 no more than the word bread they imprint themselves in every one without being1 expressed1 without voice1 and without figure2 and the sex that most practises it is bound to say least of it4 ',tis an act that we have placed in the franchise of silence1 from which to take it is a crime even to accuse and judge it2 neither dare we reprehend it but by periphrasis and picture4 ,a great favour to a criminal to be so execrable that justice thinks it unjust to touch and see him2 free1 and safe by the benefit of the severity of his condemnation4 ,is it not here as in matter of books1 that sell better and become more public for being suppressed8 ,for my part1 ,i will take ,aristotle at his word1 who says1 that bashfulness is an ornament to youth1 but a reproach to old age4 ,these verses are preached in the ancient school1 a school that ,i much more adhere to than the modern3 its virtues appear to me to be greater1 and the vices less3 ,ceux qui par trop fuyant ,venus estrivent1 ,faillent autant que ceulx qui trop la suyvent4 ,they err as much who too much forbear ,venus1 as they who are too frequent in her rites4--,a translation by ,amyot from ,plutarch1 ,a philosopher should converse with princes4 ,tu1 dea1 rerum naturam sola gubernas1 ,nec sine to quicquam dias in luminis oras ,exoritur1 neque fit laetum1 nec amabile quidquam4 ,goddess1 still thou alone governest nature1 nor without thee anything comes into light2 nothing is pleasant1 nothing joyful4 --,lucretius1 i4 #bb4 ,i know not who could set ,pallas and the ,muses at variance with ,venus1 and make them cold towards ,love2 but ,i see no deities so well met1 or that are more indebted to one another4 ,who will deprive the ,muses of amorous imaginations1 will rob them of the best entertainment they have1 and of the noblest matter of their work3 and who will make ,love lose the communication and service of poesy1 will disarm him of his best weapons3 by this means they charge the god of familiarity and good will1 and the protecting goddesses of humanity and justice1 with the vice of ingratitude and unthankfulness4 ,i have not been so long cashiered from the state and service of this god1 that my memory is not still perfect in his force and value3 ,agnosco veteris vestigia flammae2 ,i recognise vestiges of my old flame4--,a,eneid41 iv4 #bc4 ,there are yet some remains of heat and emotion after the fever3 ,nec mihi deficiat calor hic1 hiemantibus annis6 ,nor let this heat of youth fail me in my winter years4 ,withered and drooping as ,i am1 ,i feel yet some remains of the past ardour3 ,qual l'alto ,egeo1 per the ,aquilone o ,noto ,cessi1 the tutto prima il volse et scosse1 ,non 's accheta ei pero2 ma'l suono e'l moto ,ritien del l'onde anco agitate e grosse3 ,as ,aegean seas1 when storms be calmed again1 ,that rolled their tumbling waves with troublous blasts1 ,do yet of tempests passed some show retain1 ,and here and there their swelling billows cast4--,fairfax4 but from what ,i understand of it1 the force and power of this god are more lively and animated in the picture of poesy than in their own essence3 ,et versus digitos habet3 ,verse has fingers4--,altered from ,juvenal1 iv4 #aif4 it has ,i know not what kind of air1 more amorous than love itself4 ,venus is not so beautiful1 naked1 alive1 and panting1 as she is here in ,virgil3 ,dixerat2 et niveis hinc atque hinc ,diva lacertis ,cunctantem amplexu molli fovet4 ,ille repente ,accepit solitam flammam2 notusque medullas ,intravit calor1 et labefacta per ossa cucurrit ,non secus atque olim tonitru1 cum rupta corusco ,ignea rima micans percurrit lumine nimbos4 4 4 4 4 4 4 ,ea verba loquutus1 ,optatos dedit amplexus2 placidumque petivit ,conjugis infusus gremio per membra soporem4 ,the goddess spoke1 and throwing round him her snowy arms in soft embraces1 caresses him hesitating4 ,suddenly he caught the wonted flame1 and the well-known warmth pierced his marrow1 and ran thrilling through his shaken bones3 just as when at times1 with thunder1 a stream of fire in lightning flashes shoots across the skies4 ,having spoken these words1 he gave her the wished embrace1 and in the bosom of his spouse sought placid sleep4 --,a,eneid1 viii4 #chg and #cib4 ,all that ,i find fault with in considering it is1 that he has represented her a little too passionate for a married ,venus2 in this discreet kind of coupling1 the appetite is not usually so wanton1 but more grave and dull4 ,love hates that people should hold of any but itself1 and goes but faintly to work in familiarities derived from any other title1 as marriage is3 alliance1 dowry1 therein sway by reason1 as much or more than grace and beauty4 ,men do not marry for themselves1 let them say what they will2 they marry as much or more for their posterity and family2 the custom and interest of marriage concern our race much more than us2 and therefore it is1 that ,i like to have a match carried on by a third hand rather than a man's own1 and by another man's liking than that of the party himself2 and how much is all this opposite to the conventions of love8 ,and also it is a kind of incest to employ in this venerable and sacred alliance the heat and extravagance of amorous licence1 as ,i think ,i have said elsewhere4 ,a man1 says ,aristotle1 must approach his wife with prudence and temperance1 lest in dealing too lasciviously with her1 the extreme pleasure make her exceed the bounds of reason4 ,what he says upon the account of conscience1 the physicians say upon the account of health3 that a pleasure excessively lascivious1 voluptuous1 and frequent1 makes the seed too hot1 and hinders conception3 'tis said1 elsewhere1 that to a languishing intercourse1 as this naturally is1 to supply it with a due and fruitful heat1 a man must do it but seldom and at appreciable intervals3 ,quo rapiat sitiens ,venerem1 interiusque recondat4 ,but let him thirstily snatch the joys of love and enclose them in his bosom4--,virg41 ,georg41 iii4 #acg4 ,i see no marriages where the conjugal compatibility sooner fails than those that we contract upon the account of beauty and amorous desires2 there should be more solid and constant foundation1 and they should proceed with greater circumspection2 this furious ardour is worth nothing4 ,they who think they honour marriage by joining love to it1 do1 methinks1 like those who1 to favour virtue1 hold that nobility is nothing else but virtue4 ,they are indeed things that have some relation to one another1 but there is a great deal of difference2 we should not so mix their names and titles2 'tis a wrong to them both so to confound them4 ,nobility is a brave quality1 and with good reason introduced2 but forasmuch as 'tis a quality depending upon others1 and may happen in a vicious person1 in himself nothing1 'tis in estimate infinitely below virtue'2 ,if nobility be virtue1 it loses its quality in all things wherein not virtuous3 and if it be not virtue1 'tis a small matter4 --,la ,byuyere4 'tis a virtue1 if it be one1 that is artificial and apparent1 depending upon time and fortune3 various in form1 according to the country2 living and mortal2 without birth1 as the river ,nile2 genealogical and common2 of succession and similitude2 drawn by consequence1 and a very weak one4 ,knowledge1 strength1 goodness1 beauty1 riches1 and all other qualities1 fall into communication and commerce1 but this is consummated in itself1 and of no use to the service of others4 ,there was proposed to one of our kings the choice of two candidates for the same command1 of whom one was a gentleman1 the other not2 he ordered that1 without respect to quality1 they should choose him who had the most merit2 but where the worth of the competitors should appear to be entirely equal1 they should have respect to birth3 this was justly to give it its rank4 ,a young man unknown1 coming to ,antigonus to make suit for his father's command1 a valiant man lately dead3 ,friend1 said he1 in such preferments as these1 ,i have not so much regard to the nobility of my soldiers as to their prowess4 ,and1 indeed1 it ought not to go as it did with the officers of the kings of ,sparta1 trumpeters1 fiddlers1 cooks1 the children of whom always succeeded to their places1 how ignorant soever1 and were preferred before the most experienced in the trade4 ,they of ,calicut make of nobles a sort of superhuman persons3 they are interdicted marriage and all but warlike employments3 they may have of concubines their fill1 and the women as many lovers1 without being jealous of one another2 but 'tis a capital and irremissible crime to couple with a person of meaner conditions than themselves2 and they think themselves polluted1 if they have but touched one in walking along2 and supposing their nobility to be marvellously interested and injured in it1 kill such as only approach a little too near them3 insomuch that the ignoble are obliged to cry out as they walk1 like the gondoliers of ,venice1 at the turnings of streets for fear of jostling2 and the nobles command them to step aside to what part they please3 by that means these avoid what they repute a perpetual ignominy1 those certain death4 ,no time1 no favour of the prince1 no office1 or virtue1 or riches1 can ever prevail to make a plebeian become noble3 to which this custom contributes1 that marriages are interdicted betwixt different trades2 the daughter of one of the cordwainers' gild is not permitted to marry a carpenter2 and parents are obliged to train up their children precisely in their own callings1 and not put them to any other trade2 by which means the distinction and continuance of their fortunes are maintained4 ,a good marriage1 if there be any such1 rejects the company and conditions of love1 and tries to represent those of friendship4 ',tis a sweet society of life1 full of constancy1 trust1 and an infinite number of useful and solid services and mutual obligations2 which any woman who has a right taste3 ,optato quam junxit lumine taeda-- ,whom the marriage torch has joined with the desired light4 --,catullus1 lxiv4 #gi4 would be loth to serve her husband in quality of a mistress4 ,if she be lodged in his affection as a wife1 she is more honourably and securely placed4 ,when he purports to be in love with another1 and works all he can to obtain his desire1 let any one but ask him1 on which he had rather a disgrace should fall1 his wife or his mistress1 which of their misfortunes would most afflict him1 and to which of them he wishes the most grandeur1 the answer to these questions is out of dispute in a sound marriage4 ,and that so few are observed to be happy1 is a token of its price and value4 ,if well formed and rightly taken1 'tis the best of all human societies2 we cannot live without it1 and yet we do nothing but decry it4 ,it happens1 as with cages1 the birds without despair to get in1 and those within despair of getting out4 ,socrates being asked1 whether it was more commodious to take a wife or not1 ,let a man take which course he will1 said he2 he will repent4 ',tis a contract to which the common saying3 ,homo homini aut deus aut lupus1 ,man to man is either a god or a wolf4--,erasmus1 ,adag4 may very fitly be applied2 there must be a concurrence of many qualities in the construction4 ,it is found nowadays more convenient for simple and plebeian souls1 where delights1 curiosity1 and idleness do not so much disturb it2 but extravagant humours1 such as mine1 that hate all sorts of obligation and restraint1 are not so proper for it3 ,et mihi dulce magis resoluto vivere collo4 ,and it is sweet to me to live with a loosened neck4 --,pseudo ,gallus1 i4 #fa4 ,might ,i have had my own will1 ,i would not have married ,wisdom herself1 if she would have had me4 ,but 'tis to much purpose to evade it2 the common custom and usance of life will have it so4 ,the most of my actions are guided by example1 not by choice1 and yet ,i did not go to it of my own voluntary motion2 ,i was led and drawn to it by extrinsic occasions2 for not only things that are incommodious in themselves1 but also things however ugly1 vicious1 and to be avoided1 may be rendered acceptable by some condition or accident2 so unsteady and vain is all human resolution6 and ,i was persuaded to it1 when worse prepared and less tractable than ,i am at present1 that ,i have tried what it is3 and as great a libertine as ,i am taken to be1 ,i have in truth more strictly observed the laws of marriage1 than ,i either promised or expected4 ',tis in vain to kick1 when a man has once put on his fetters3 a man must prudently manage his liberty2 but having once submitted to obligation1 he must confine himself within the laws of common duty1 at least1 do what he can towards it4 ,they who engage in this contract1 with a design to carry themselves in it with hatred and contempt1 do an unjust and inconvenient thing2 and the fine rule that ,i hear pass from hand to hand amongst the women1 as a sacred oracle3 ,serve thy husband as thy master1 but guard thyself against him as from a traitor4 which is to say1 comport thyself towards him with a dissembled1 inimical1 and distrustful reverence 7a cry of war and defiance71 is equally injurious and hard4 ,i am too mild for such rugged designs3 to say the truth1 ,i am not arrived to that perfection of ability and refinement of wit1 to confound reason with injustice1 and to laugh at all rule and order that does not please my palate2 because ,i hate superstition1 ,i do not presently run into the contrary extreme of irreligion4 7,if a man hate superstition he cannot love religion4 ,d4,w47 ,if a man does not always perform his duty1 he ought at least to love and acknowledge it2 'tis treachery to marry without espousing4 ,let us proceed4 ,our poet represents a marriage happy in a good accord wherein nevertheless there is not much loyalty4 ,does he mean1 that it is not impossible but a woman may give the reins to her own passion1 and yield to the importunities of love1 and yet reserve some duty toward marriage1 and that it may be hurt1 without being totally broken8 ,a serving man may cheat his master1 whom nevertheless he does not hate4 ,beauty1 opportunity1 and destiny 7for destiny has also a hand in't71 ,fatum est in partibus illis ,quas sinus abscondit2 nam1 si tibi sidera cessent1 ,nil faciet longi mensura incognita nervi2 ,there is a fatality about the hidden parts3 let nature have endowed you however liberally1 'tis of no use1 if your good star fails you in the nick of time4--,juvenal1 ix4 #cb4 have attached her to a stranger2 though not so wholly1 peradventure1 but that she may have some remains of kindness for her husband4 ,they are two designs1 that have several paths leading to them1 without being confounded with one another2 a woman may yield to a man she would by no means have married1 not only for the condition of his fortune1 but for those also of his person4 ,few men have made a wife of a mistress1 who have not repented it4 ,and even in the other world1 what an unhappy life does ,jupiter lead with his1 whom he had first enjoyed as a mistress6 ',tis1 as the proverb runs1 to befoul a basket and then put it upon one's head4 ,i have in my time1 in a good family1 seen love shamefully and dishonestly cured by marriage3 the considerations are widely different4 ,we love at once1 without any tie1 two things contrary in themselves4 ,socrates was wont to say1 that the city of ,athens pleased1 as ladies do whom men court for love2 every one loved to come thither to take a turn1 and pass away his time2 but no one liked it so well as to espouse it1 that is1 to inhabit there1 and to make it his constant residence4 ,i have been vexed to see husbands hate their wives only because they themselves do them wrong2 we should not1 at all events1 methinks1 love them the less for our own faults2 they should at least1 upon the account of repentance and compassion1 be dearer to us4 ,they are different ends1 he says1 and yet in some sort compatible2 marriage has utility1 justice1 honour1 and constancy for its share2 a flat1 but more universal pleasure3 love founds itself wholly upon pleasure1 and1 indeed1 has it more full1 lively1 and sharp2 a pleasure inflamed by difficulty2 there must be in it sting and smart3 'tis no longer love1 if without darts and fire4 ,the bounty of ladies is too profuse in marriage1 and dulls the point of affection and desire3 to evade which inconvenience1 do but observe what pains ,lycurgus and ,plato take in their laws4 ,women are not to blame at all1 when they refuse the rules of life that are introduced into the world1 forasmuch as the men make them without their help4 ,there is naturally contention and brawling betwixt them and us2 and the strictest friendship we have with them is yet mixed with tumult and tempest4 ,in the opinion of our author1 we deal inconsiderately with them in this3 after we have discovered that they are1 without comparison1 more able and ardent in the practice of love than we1 and that the old priest testified as much1 who had been one while a man1 and then a woman3 ,venus huic erat utraque nota3 ,both aspects of love were known to him1 --,tiresias4 ,ovid4 ,metam41 iii4 #cbc4 and moreover1 that we have learned from their own mouths the proof that1 in several ages1 was made by an ,emperor and ,empress of ,rome1--,proclus4 --both famous for ability in that affair6 for he in one night deflowered ten ,sarmatian virgins who were his captives3 but she had five-and-twenty bouts in one night1 changing her man according to her need and liking2 ,adhuc ardens rigidae tentigine vulvae ,et lassata viris1 nondum satiata1 recessit3 ,ardent still1 she retired1 fatigued1 but not satisfied4 --,juvenal1 vi4 #abh4 and that upon the dispute which happened in ,cataluna1 wherein a wife complaining of her husband's too frequent addresses to her1 not so much1 as ,i conceive1 that she was incommodated by it 7for ,i believe no miracles out of religion7 as under this pretence1 to curtail and curb in this1 which is the fundamental act of marriage1 the authority of husbands over their wives1 and to shew that their frowardness and malignity go beyond the nuptial bed1 and spurn under foot even the graces and sweets of ,venus2 the husband1 a man truly brutish and unnatural1 replied1 that even on fasting days he could not subsist with less than ten courses3 whereupon came out that notable sentence of the ,queen of ,arragon1 by which1 after mature deliberation of her council1 this good queen1 to give a rule and example to all succeeding ages of the moderation required in a just marriage1 set down six times a day as a legitimate and necessary stint2 surrendering and quitting a great deal of the needs and desires of her sex1 that she might1 she said1 establish an easy1 and consequently1 a permanent and immutable rule4 ,hereupon the doctors cry out3 what must the female appetite and concupiscence be1 when their reason1 their reformation and virtue1 are taxed at such a rate1 considering the divers judgments of our appetites8 for ,solon1 master of the law school1 taxes us but at three a month1--that men may not fail in point of conjugal frequentation3 after having1 ,i say1 believed and preached all this1 we go and enjoin them continency for their particular share1 and upon the last and extreme penalties4 ,there is no passion so hard to contend with as this1 which we would have them only resist1 not simply as an ordinary vice1 but as an execrable abomination1 worse than irreligion and parricide2 whilst we1 at the same time1 go to't without offence or reproach4 ,even those amongst us who have tried the experiment have sufficiently confessed what difficulty1 or rather impossibility1 they have found by material remedies to subdue1 weaken1 and cool the body4 ,we1 on the contrary1 would have them at once sound1 vigorous plump1 high-fed1 and chaste2 that is to say1 both hot and cold2 for the marriage1 which we tell them is to keep them from burning1 is but small refreshment to them1 as we order the matter4 ,if they take one whose vigorous age is yet boiling1 he will be proud to make it known elsewhere2 ,sit tandem pudor2 aut eamus in jus2 ,multis mentula millibus redempta1 ,non est haec tua1 ,basse2 vendidisti2 ,let there be some shame1 or we shall go to law3 your vigour1 bought by your wife with many thousands1 is no longer yours3 thou hast sold it4--,martial1 xii4 #ij4 ,polemon the philosopher was justly by his wife brought before the judge for sowing in a barren field the seed that was due to one that was fruitful3 if1 on the other hand1 they take a decayed fellow1 they are in a worse condition in marriage than either maids or widows4 ,we think them well provided for1 because they have a man to lie with1 as the ,romans concluded ,clodia ,laeta1 a vestal nun1 violated1 because ,caligula had approached her1 though it was declared he did no more but approach her3 but1 on the contrary1 we by that increase their necessity1 forasmuch as the touch and company of any man whatever rouses their desires1 that in solitude would be more quiet4 ,and to the end1 'tis likely1 that they might render their chastity more meritorious by this circumstance and consideration1 ,boleslas and ,kinge his wife1 kings of ,poland1 vowed it by mutual consent1 being in bed together1 on their very wedding day1 and kept their vow in spite of all matrimonial conveniences4 ,we train them up from their infancy to the traffic of love2 their grace1 dressing1 knowledge1 language1 and whole instruction tend that way3 their governesses imprint nothing in them but the idea of love1 if for nothing else but by continually representing it to them1 to give them a distaste for it4 ,my daughter1 the only child ,i have1 is now of an age that forward young women are allowed to be married at2 she is of a slow1 thin1 and tender complexion1 and has accordingly been brought up by her mother after a retired and particular manner1 so that she but now begins to be weaned from her childish simplicity4 ,she was reading before me in a ,french book where the word 'fouteau'1 the name of a tree very well known1 occurred2--,the beech-tree2 the name resembles in sound an obscene ,french word4--the woman1 to whose conduct she is committed1 stopped her short a little roughly1 and made her skip over that dangerous step4 ,i let her alone1 not to trouble their rules1 for ,i never concern myself in that sort of government2 feminine polity has a mysterious procedure2 we must leave it to them2 but if ,i am not mistaken the commerce of twenty lacquies could not1 in six months' time1 have so imprinted in her memory the meaning1 usage1 and all the consequence of the sound of these wicked syllables1 as this good old woman did by reprimand and interdiction4 ,motus doceri gaudet ,ionicos ,matura virgo1 et frangitur artibus2 ,jam nunc et incestos amores ,de tenero1 meditatur ungui4 ,the maid ripe for marriage delights to learn ,ionic dances1 and to imitate those lascivious movements4 ,nay1 already from her infancy she meditates criminal amours4--,horace1 ,od41 iii4 #f1 #ba41 the text has 'fingitur'4 ,let them but give themselves the rein a little1 let them but enter into liberty of discourse1 we are but children to them in this science4 ,hear them but describe our pursuits and conversation1 they will very well make you understand that we bring them nothing they have not known before1 and digested without our help4 ,this sentence refers to a conversation between some young women in his immediate neighbourhood1 which the ,essayist just below informs us that he overheard1 and which was too shocking for him to repeat4 ,it must have been tolerably bad4--,remark by the editor of a later edition4 ,is it1 perhaps1 as ,plato says1 that they have formerly been debauched young fellows8 ,i happened one day to be in a place where ,i could hear some of their talk without suspicion2 ,i am sorry ,i cannot repeat it4 ,by'rlady1 said ,i1 we had need go study the phrases of ,amadis1 and the tales of ,boccaccio and ,aretin1 to be able to discourse with them3 we employ our time to much purpose indeed4 ,there is neither word1 example1 nor step they are not more perfect in than our books2 'tis a discipline that springs with their blood1 ,et mentem ipsa ,venus dedit1 ,venus herself made them what they are1 --,virg41 ,georg41 iii4 #bfg4 which these good instructors1 nature1 youth1 and health1 are continually inspiring them with2 they need not learn1 they breed it3 ,nec tantum niveo gavisa est ulla columbo1 ,compar1 vel si quid dicitur improbius1 ,oscula mordenti semper decerpere rostro1 ,quantum praecipue multivola est mulier4 ,no milk-white dove1 or if there be a thing more lascivious1 takes so much delight in kissing as woman1 wishful for every man she sees4--,catullus1 lxvi4 #abe4 ,so that if the natural violence of their desire were not a little restrained by fear and honour1 which were wisely contrived for them1 we should be all shamed4 ,all the motions in the world resolve into and tend to this conjunction2 'tis a matter infused throughout3 'tis a centre to which all things are directed4 ,we yet see the edicts of the old and wise ,rome made for the service of love1 and the precepts of ,socrates for the instruction of courtezans3 ,noncon libelli ,stoici inter sericos ,jacere pulvillos amant3 ,there are writings of the ,stoics which we find lying upon silken cushions4--,horace1 ,epod41 viii4 #ae4 ,zeno1 amongst his laws1 also regulated the motions to be observed in getting a maidenhead4 ,what was the philosopher ,strato's book ,of ,carnal ,conjunction8-- ,diogenes ,laertius1 v4 #ei4--;,and what did ,theophrastus treat of in those he intituled1 the one ',the ,lover'1 and the other ',of ,love8' ,of what ,aristippus in his ',of ,former ,delights'8 ,what do the so long and lively descriptions in ,plato of the loves of his time pretend to8 and the book called ',the ,lover'1 of ,demetrius ,phalereus8 and ',clinias'1 or the ',ravished ,lover'1 of ,heraclides2 and that of ,antisthenes1 ',of ,getting ,children'1 or1 ',of ,weddings'1 and the other1 ',of the ,master or the ,lover'8 ,and that of ,aristo3 ',of ,amorous ,exercises' ,what those of ,cleanthes3 one1 ',of ,love'1 the other1 ',of the ,art of ,loving'8 ,the amorous dialogues of ,sphaereus8 and the fable of ,jupiter and ,juno1 of ,chrysippus1 impudent beyond all toleration8 ,and his fifty so lascivious epistles8 ,i will let alone the writings of the philosophers of the ,epicurean sect1 protectress of voluptuousness4 ,fifty deities were1 in time past1 assigned to this office2 and there have been nations where1 to assuage the lust of those who came to their devotion1 they kept men and women in their temples for the worshippers to lie with2 and it was an act of ceremony to do this before they went to prayers3 ,nimirum propter continentiam incontinentia necessaria est2 incendium ignibus extinguitur4 ,forsooth incontinency is necessary for continency's sake2 a conflagration is extinguished by fire4 ,in the greatest part of the world1 that member of our body was deified2 in the same province1 some flayed off the skin to offer and consecrate a piece2 others offered and consecrated their seed4 ,in another1 the young men publicly cut through betwixt the skin and the flesh of that part in several places1 and thrust pieces of wood into the openings as long and thick as they would receive1 and of these pieces of wood afterwards made a fire as an offering to their gods2 and were reputed neither vigorous nor chaste1 if by the force of that cruel pain they seemed to be at all dismayed4 ,elsewhere the most sacred magistrate was reverenced and acknowledged by that member and in several ceremonies the effigy of it was carried in pomp to the honour of various divinities4 ,the ,egyptian ladies1 in their ,bacchanalia1 each carried one finely-carved of wood about their necks1 as large and heavy as she could so carry it2 besides which1 the statue of their god presented one1 which in greatness surpassed all the rest of his body4--,herodotus1 ii4 #dh1 says nearly as large as the body itself4--,the married women1 near the place where ,i live1 make of their kerchiefs the figure of one upon their foreheads1 to glorify themselves in the enjoyment they have of it2 and coming to be widows1 they throw it behind1 and cover it with their headcloths4 ,the most modest matrons of ,rome thought it an honour to offer flowers and garlands to the god ,priapus2 and they made the virgins1 at the time of their espousals1 sit upon his shameful parts4 ,and ,i know not whether ,i have not in my time seen some air of like devotion4 ,what was the meaning of that ridiculous piece of the chaussuye of our forefathers1 and that is still worn by our ,swiss8 ,cod-pieces worn--,cotton--,to what end do we make a show of our implements in figure under our breeches1 and often1 which is worse1 above their natural size1 by falsehood and imposture8 ,i have half a mind to believe that this sort of vestment was invented in the better and more conscientious ages1 that the world might not be deceived1 and that every one should give a public account of his proportions3 the simple nations wear them yet1 and near about the real size4 ,in those days1 the tailor took measure of it1 as the shoemaker does now of a man's foot4 ,that good man1 who1 when ,i was young1 gelded so many noble and ancient statues in his great city1 that they might not corrupt the sight of the ladies1 according to the advice of this other ancient worthy3 ,flagitii principium est1 nudare inter gives corpora1 ',tis the beginning of wickedness to expose their persons among the citizens--,ennius1 ap4 ,cicero1 ,tusc4 ,quaes41 iv4 #cc4 should have called to mind1 that1 as in the mysteries of the ,bona ,dea1 all masculine appearance was excluded1 he did nothing1 if he did not geld horses and asses1 in short1 all nature3 ,omne adeo genus in terris1 hominumque1 ferarumque1 ,et genus aequoreum1 pecudes1 pictaeque volucres1 ,in furias ignemque ruunt4 ,so that all living things1 men and animals1 wild or tame1 and fish and gaudy fowl1 rush to this flame of love4 --,virgil1 ,georg41 iii4 #bdd4 ,the gods1 says ,plato1 have given us one disobedient and unruly member that1 like a furious animal1 attempts1 by the violence of its appetite1 to subject all things to it2 and so they have given to women one like a greedy and ravenous animal1 which1 if it be refused food in season1 grows wild1 impatient of delay1 and infusing its rage into their bodies1 stops the passages1 and hinders respiration1 causing a thousand ills1 till1 having imbibed the fruit of the common thirst1 it has plentifully bedewed the bottom of their matrix4 ,now my legislator--,the ,pope who1 as ,montaigne has told us1 took it into his head to geld the statues4-- should also have considered that1 peradventure1 it were a chaster and more fruitful usage to let them know the fact as it is betimes1 than permit them to guess according to the liberty and heat of their own fancy2 instead of the real parts they substitute1 through hope and desire1 others that are three times more extravagant2 and a certain friend of mine lost himself by producing his in place and time when the opportunity was not present to put them to their more serious use4 ,what mischief do not those pictures of prodigious dimension do that the boys make upon the staircases and galleries of the royal houses8 they give the ladies a cruel contempt of our natural furniture4 ,and what do we know but that ,plato1 after other well-instituted republics1 ordered that the men and women1 old and young1 should expose themselves naked to the view of one another1 in his gymnastic exercises1 upon that very account8 ,the ,indian women who see the men in their natural state1 have at least cooled the sense of seeing4 ,and let the women of the kingdom of ,pegu say what they will1 who below the waist have nothing to cover them but a cloth slit before1 and so strait1 that what decency and modesty soever they pretend by it1 at every step all is to be seen1 that it is an invention to allure the men to them1 and to divert them from boys1 to whom that nation is generally inclined2 yet1 peradventure they lose more by it than they get1 and one may venture to say1 that an entire appetite is more sharp than one already half-glutted by the eyes4 ,livia was wont to say1 that to a virtuous woman a naked man was but a statue4 ,the ,lacedaemonian women1 more virgins when wives than our daughters are1 saw every day the young men of their city stripped naked in their exercises1 themselves little heeding to cover their thighs in walking1 believing themselves1 says ,plato1 sufficiently covered by their virtue without any other robe4 ,but those1 of whom ,st4 ,augustin speaks1 have given nudity a wonderful power of temptation1 who have made it a doubt1 whether women at the day of judgment shall rise again in their own sex1 and not rather in ours1 for fear of tempting us again in that holy state4 ,in brief1 we allure and flesh them by all sorts of ways3 we incessantly heat and stir up their imagination1 and then we find fault4 ,let us confess the truth2 there is scarce one of us who does not more apprehend the shame that accrues to him by the vices of his wife than by his own1 and that is not more solicitous 7a wonderful charity7 of the conscience of his virtuous wife than of his own2 who had not rather commit theft and sacrilege1 and that his wife was a murderess and a heretic1 than that she should not be more chaste than her husband3 an unjust estimate of vices4 ,both we and they are capable of a thousand corruptions more prejudicial and unnatural than lust3 but we weigh vices1 not according to nature1 but according to our interest2 by which means they take so many unequal forms4 ,the austerity of our decrees renders the application of women to this vice more violent and vicious than its own condition needs1 and engages it in consequences worse than their cause3 they will readily offer to go to the law courts to seek for gain1 and to the wars to get reputation1 rather than in the midst of ease and delights1 to have to keep so difficult a guard4 ,do not they very well see that there is neither merchant nor soldier who will not leave his business to run after this sport1 or the porter or cobbler1 toiled and tired out as they are with labour and hunger8 ,num tu1 qux tenuit dives ,achaemenes1 ,aut pinguis ,phrygiae ,mygdonias opes1 ,permutare velis crine ,licymnim8 ,plenas aut ,arabum domos1 ,dum fragrantia detorquet ad oscula ,cervicem1 aut facili sxvitia negat1 ,quae poscente magis gaudeat eripi1 ,interdum rapere occupet8 ,wouldst thou not exchange all that the wealthy ,arhaemenes had1 or the ,mygdonian riches of fertile ,phrygia1 for one ringlet of ,licymnia's hair8 or the treasures of the ,arabians1 when she turns her head to you for fragrant kisses1 or with easily assuaged anger denies them1 which she would rather by far you took by force1 and sometimes herself snatches one6--,horace1 ,od41 ii4 #ab1 #ba4 ,i do not know whether the exploits of ,alexander and ,caesar really surpass the resolution of a beautiful young woman1 bred up after our fashion1 in the light and commerce of the world1 assailed by so many contrary examples1 and yet keeping herself entire in the midst of a thousand continual and powerful solicitations4 ,there is no doing more difficult than that not doing1 nor more active3 ,i hold it more easy to carry a suit of armour all the days of one's life than a maidenhead2 and the vow of virginity of all others is the most noble1 as being the hardest to keep3 ,diaboli virtus in lumbis est1 says ,st4 ,jerome4 ,we have1 doubtless1 resigned to the ladies the most difficult and most vigorous of all human endeavours1 and let us resign to them the glory too4 ,this ought to encourage them to be obstinate in it2 'tis a brave thing for them to defy us1 and to spurn under foot that vain pre-eminence of valour and virtue that we pretend to have over them2 they will find if they do but observe it1 that they will not only be much more esteemed for it1 but also much more beloved4 ,a gallant man does not give over his pursuit for being refused1 provided it be a refusal of chastity1 and not of choice2 we may swear1 threaten1 and complain to much purpose2 we therein do but lie1 for we love them all the better3 there is no allurement like modesty1 if it be not rude and crabbed4 ',tis stupidity and meanness to be obstinate against hatred and disdain2 but against a virtuous and constant resolution1 mixed with goodwill1 'tis the exercise of a noble and generous soul4 ,they may acknowledge our service to a certain degree1 and give us civilly to understand that they disdain us not2 for the law that enjoins them to abominate us because we adore them1 and to hate us because we love them1 is certainly very cruel1 if but for the difficulty of it4 ,why should they not give ear to our offers and requests1 so long as they are kept within the bounds of modesty8 wherefore should we fancy them to have other thoughts within1 and to be worse than they seem8 ,a queen of our time said with spirit1 that to refuse these courtesies is a testimony of weakness in women and a self-accusation of facility1 and that a lady could not boast of her chastity who was never tempted4 ,the limits of honour are not cut so short2 they may give themselves a little rein1 and relax a little without being faulty3 there lies on the frontier some space free1 indifferent1 and neuter4 ,he that has beaten and pursued her into her fort is a strange fellow if he be not satisfied with his fortune3 the price of the conquest is considered by the difficulty4 ,would you know what impression your service and merit have made in her heart8 ,judge of it by her behaviour4 ,such an one may grant more1 who does not grant so much4 ,the obligation of a benefit wholly relates to the good will of those who confer it3 the other coincident circumstances are dumb1 dead1 and casual2 it costs her dearer to grant you that little1 than it would do her companion to grant all4 ,if in anything rarity give estimation1 it ought especially in this3 do not consider how little it is that is given1 but how few have it to give2 the value of money alters according to the coinage and stamp of the place4 ,whatever the spite and indiscretion of some may make them say in the excess of their discontent1 virtue and truth will in time recover all the advantage4 ,i have known some whose reputation has for a great while suffered under slander1 who have afterwards been restored to the world's universal approbation by their mere constancy without care or artifice2 every one repents1 and gives himself the lie for what he has believed and said2 and from girls a little suspected they have been afterward advanced to the first rank amongst the ladies of honour4 ,somebody told ,plato that all the world spoke ill of him4 ,let them talk1 said he2 ,i will live so as to make them change their note4 ,besides the fear of ,god1 and the value of so rare a glory1 which ought to make them look to themselves1 the corruption of the age we live in compels them to it2 and if ,i were they1 there is nothing ,i would not rather do than intrust my reputation in so dangerous hands4 ,in my time the pleasure of telling 7a pleasure little inferior to that of doing7 was not permitted but to those who had some faithful and only friend2 but now the ordinary discourse and common table-talk is nothing but boasts of favours received and the secret liberality of ladies4 ,in earnest1 'tis too abject1 too much meanness of spirit1 in men to suffer such ungrateful1 indiscreet1 and giddy-headed people so to persecute1 forage1 and rifle those tender and charming favours4 ,this our immoderate and illegitimate exasperation against this vice springs from the most vain and turbulent disease that afflicts human minds1 which is jealousy3 ,quis vetat apposito lumen de lumine sumi8 ,dent licet assidue1 nil tamen inde perit2 ,who says that one light should not be lighted from another light8 ,let them give ever so much1 as much ever remains to lose4--,ovid1 ,de ,arte ,amandi1 iii4 #ic4 ,the measure of the last line is not good2 but the words are taken from the epigram in the ,catalecta entitled ,priapus4 she1 and envy1 her sister1 seem to me to be the most foolish of the whole troop4 ,as to the last1 ,i can say little about it2 'tis a passion that1 though said to be so mighty and powerful1 had never to do with me4 ,as to the other1 ,i know it by sight1 and that's all4 ,beasts feel it2 the shepherd ,cratis1 having fallen in love with a she-goat1 the he-goat1 out of jealousy1 came1 as he lay asleep1 to butt the head of the female1 and crushed it4 ,we have raised this fever to a greater excess by the examples of some barbarous nations2 the best disciplined have been touched with it1 and 'tis reason1 but not transported3 ,ense maritali nemo confossus adulter ,purpureo ,stygias sanguine tinxit aquas4 ,never did adulterer slain by a husband stain with purple blood the ,stygian waters4 ,lucullus1 ,caesar1 ,pompey1 ,antony1 ,cato1 and other brave men were cuckolds1 and knew it1 without making any bustle about it2 there was in those days but one coxcomb1 ,lepidus1 that died for grief that his wife had used him so4 ,ah6 tum te miserum malique fati1 ,quem attractis pedibus1 patente porta1 ,percurrent raphanique mugilesque3 ,wretched man6 when1 taken in the fact1 thou wilt be dragged out of doors by the heels1 and suffer the punishment of thy adultery4--,catullus1 xv4 #ag4 and the god of our poet1 when he surprised one of his companions with his wife1 satisfied himself by putting them to shame only1 ,atque aliquis de dis non tristibus optat ,sic fieri turpis3 ,and one of the merry gods wishes that he should himself like to be so disgraced4--,ovid1 ,metam41 iv4 #ahg4 and nevertheless took anger at the lukewarm embraces she gave him2 complaining that upon that account she was grown jealous of his affection3 ,quid causas petis ex alto8 fiducia cessit ,quo tibi1 diva1 mei8 ,dost thou seek causes from above8 ,why1 goddess1 has your confidence in me ceased8--,virgil1 ,a,eneid1 viii4 #cie4 nay1 she entreats arms for a bastard of hers1 ,arena rogo genitrix nato4 ,i1 a mother1 ask armour for a son4--,idem1 ibid41 #chc4 which are freely granted2 and ,vulcan speaks honourably of ,a,eneas1 ,arma acri facienda viro1 ,arms are to be made for a valiant hero4--,a,eneid1 viii4 #dda4 with1 in truth1 a more than human humanity4 ,and ,i am willing to leave this excess of kindness to the gods3 ,nec divis homines componier aequum est4 ,nor is it fit to compare men with gods4 --,catullus1 lxviii4 #ada4 ,as to the confusion of children1 besides that the gravest legislators ordain and affect it in their republics1 it touches not the women1 where this passion is1 ,i know not how1 much better seated3 ,saepe etiam ,juno1 maxima coelicolam1 ,conjugis in culpa flagravit quotidiana4 ,often was ,juno1 greatest of the heaven-dwellers1 enraged by her husband's daily infidelities4--,idem1 ibid4 ,when jealousy seizes these poor souls1 weak and incapable of resistance1 'tis pity to see how miserably it torments and tyrannises over them2 it insinuates itself into them under the title of friendship1 but after it has once possessed them1 the same causes that served for a foundation of good-will serve them for a foundation of mortal hatred4 ',tis1 of all the diseases of the mind1 that which the most things serve for aliment and the fewest for remedy3 the virtue1 health1 merit1 reputation of the husband are incendiaries of their fury and ill-will3 ,nullae sunt inimicitiae1 nisi amoris1 acerbae4 ,no enmities are bitter1 save that of love4 7,or37 ,no hate is implacable except the hatred of love --,propertius1 ii4 #h1 #c4 ,this fever defaces and corrupts all they have of beautiful and good besides2 and there is no action of a jealous woman1 let her be how chaste and how good a housewife soever1 that does not relish of anger and wrangling2 'tis a furious agitation1 that rebounds them to an extremity quite contrary to its cause4 ,this held good with one ,octavius at ,rome4 ,having lain with ,pontia ,posthumia1 he augmented love with fruition1 and solicited with all importunity to marry her3 unable to persuade her1 this excessive affection precipitated him to the effects of the most cruel and mortal hatred3 he killed her4 ,in like manner1 the ordinary symptoms of this other amorous disease are intestine hatreds1 private conspiracies1 and cabals3 ,notumque furens quid faemina possit1 ,and it is known what an angry woman is capable of doing4 --,a,eneid1 ,v4 #ba4 and a rage which so much the more frets itself1 as it is compelled to excuse itself by a pretence of good-will4 ,now1 the duty of chastity is of a vast extent2 is it the will that we would have them restrain8 ,this is a very supple and active thing2 a thing very nimble1 to be stayed4 ,how8 if dreams sometimes engage them so far that they cannot deny them3 it is not in them1 nor1 peradventure1 in chastity itself1 seeing that is a female1 to defend itself from lust and desire4 ,if we are only to trust to their will1 what a case are we in1 then8 ,do but imagine what crowding there would be amongst men in pursuance of the privilege to run full speed1 without tongue or eyes1 into every woman's arms who would accept them4 ,the ,scythian women put out the eyes of all their slaves and prisoners of war1 that they might have their pleasure of them1 and they never the wiser4 ,o1 the furious advantage of opportunity6 ,should any one ask me1 what was the first thing to be considered in love matters1 ,i should answer that it was how to take a fitting time2 and so the second2 and so the third--'tis a point that can do everything4 ,i have sometimes wanted fortune1 but ,i have also sometimes been wanting to myself in matters of attempt4 ,god help him1 who yet makes light of this6 ,there is greater temerity required in this age of ours1 which our young men excuse under the name of heat2 but should women examine it more strictly1 they would find that it rather proceeds from contempt4 ,i was always superstitiously afraid of giving offence1 and have ever had a great respect for her ,i loved3 besides1 he who in this traffic takes away the reverence1 defaces at the same time the lustre4 ,i would in this affair have a man a little play the child1 the timorous1 and the servant4 ,if not this1 ,i have in other bashfulness whereof altogether in things some air of the foolish ,plutarch makes mention2 and the course of my life has been divers ways hurt and blemished with it2 a quality very ill suiting my universal form3 and1 indeed1 what are we but sedition and discrepancy8 ,i am as much out of countenance to be denied as ,i am to deny2 and it so much troubles me to be troublesome to others that on occasion when duty compels me to try the good-will of any one in a thing that is doubtful and that will be chargeable to him1 ,i do it very faintly1 and very much against my will3 but if it be for my own particular 7whatever ,homer truly says1 that modesty is a foolish virtue in an indigent person71 ,i commonly commit it to a third person to blush for me1 and deny those who employ me with the same difficulty3 so that it has sometimes befallen me to have had a mind to deny1 when ,i had not the power to do it4 ',tis folly1 then1 to attempt to bridle in women a desire that is so powerful in them1 and so natural to them4 ,and when ,i hear them brag of having so maidenly and so temperate a will1 ,i laugh at them3 they retire too far back4 ,if it be an old toothless trot1 or a young dry consumptive thing1 though it be not altogether to be believed1 at least they say it with more similitude of truth4 ,but they who still move and breathe1 talk at that ridiculous rate to their own prejudice1 by reason that inconsiderate excuses are a kind of self-accusation2 like a gentleman1 a neighbour of mine1 suspected to be insufficient3 ,languidior tenera cui pendens sicula beta1 ,numquam se mediam sustulit ad tunicam1 ,catullus1 lxvii4 #b1 i4--,the sense is in the context4 who three or four days after he was married1 to justify himself1 went about boldly swearing that he had ridden twenty stages the night before3 an oath that was afterwards made use of to convict him of his ignorance in that affair1 and to divorce him from his wife4 ,besides1 it signifies nothing1 for there is neither continency nor virtue where there are no opposing desires4 ,it is true1 they may say1 but we will not yield2 saints themselves speak after that manner4 ,i mean those who boast in good gravity of their coldness and insensibility1 and who expect to be believed with a serious countenance2 for when 'tis spoken with an affected look1 when their eyes give the lie to their tongue1 and when they talk in the cant of their profession1 which always goes against the hair1 'tis good sport4 ,i am a great servant of liberty and plainness2 but there is no remedy2 if it be not wholly simple or childish1 'tis silly1 and unbecoming ladies in this commerce1 and presently runs into impudence4 ,their disguises and figures only serve to cosen fools2 lying is there in its seat of honour2 'tis a by-way1 that by a back-door leads us to truth4 ,if we cannot curb their imagination1 what would we have from them4 ,effects8 ,there are enough of them that evade all foreign communication1 by which chastity may be corrupted3 ,illud saepe facit1 quod sine teste facit2 ,he often does that which he does without a witness4 --,martial1 vii4 #fb1 #f4 and those which we fear the least are1 peradventure1 most to be feared2 their sins that make the least noise are the worst3 ,offendor maecha simpliciore minus4 ,i am less offended with a more professed strumpet4 --,idem1 vi4 #g1f4 ,there are ways by which they may lose their virginity without prostitution1 and1 which is more1 without their knowledge3 ,obsterix1 virginis cujusdam integritatem manu velut explorans1 sive malevolentia1 sive inscitia1 sive casu1 dum inspicit1 perdidit4 ,by malevolence1 or unskilfulness1 or accident1 the midwife1 seeking with the hand to test some maiden's virginity1 has sometimes destroyed it4--,st4 ,augustine1 ,de ,civit4 ,dei1 i4 #ah4 ,such a one1 by seeking her maidenhead1 has lost it2 another by playing with it has destroyed it4 ,we cannot precisely circumscribe the actions1 we interdict them2 they must guess at our meaning under general and doubtful terms2 the very idea we invent for their chastity is ridiculous3 for1 amongst the greatest patterns that ,i have is ,fatua1 the wife of ,faunus3 who never1 after her marriage1 suffered herself to be seen by any man whatever2 and the wife of ,hiero1 who never perceived her husband's stinking breath1 imagining that it was common to all men4 ,they must become insensible and invisible to satisfy us4 ,now let us confess that the knot of this judgment of duty principally lies in the will2 there have been husbands who have suffered cuckoldom1 not only without reproach or taking offence at their wives1 but with singular obligation to them and great commendation of their virtue4 ,such a woman has been1 who prized her honour above her life1 and yet has prostituted it to the furious lust of a mortal enemy1 to save her husband's life1 and who1 in so doing1 did that for him she would not have done for herself6 ,this is not the place wherein we are to multiply these examples2 they are too high and rich to be set off with so poor a foil as ,i can give them here2 let us reserve them for a nobler place2 but for examples of ordinary lustre1 do we not every day see women amongst us who surrender themselves for their husbands sole benefit1 and by their express order and mediation8 and1 of old1 ,phaulius the ,argian1 who offered his to ,king ,philip out of ambition2 as ,galba did it out of civility1 who1 having entertained ,maecenas at supper1 and observing that his wife and he began to cast glances at one another and to make eyes and signs1 let himself sink down upon his cushion1 like one in a profound sleep1 to give opportunity to their desires3 which he handsomely confessed1 for thereupon a servant having made bold to lay hands on the plate upon the table1 he frankly cried1 ,what1 you rogue8 do you not see that ,i only sleep for ,maecenas8 ,such there may be1 whose manners may be lewd enough1 whose will may be more reformed than another1 who outwardly carries herself after a more regular manner4 ,as we see some who complain of having vowed chastity before they knew what they did2 and ,i have also known others really1 complain of having been given up to debauchery before they were of the years of discretion4 ,the vice of the parents or the impulse of nature1 which is a rough counsellor1 may be the cause4 ,in the ,east ,indies1 though chastity is of singular reputation1 yet custom permitted a married woman to prostitute herself to any one who presented her with an elephant1 and that with glory1 to have been valued at so high a rate4 ,phaedo the philosopher1 a man of birth1 after the taking of his country ,elis1 made it his trade to prostitute the beauty of his youth1 so long as it lasted1 to any one that would1 for money thereby to gain his living3 and ,solon was the first in ,greece1 'tis said1 who by his laws gave liberty to women1 at the expense of their chastity1 to provide for the necessities of life2 a custom that ,herodotus says had been received in many governments before his time4 ,and besides1 what fruit is there of this painful solicitude8 ,for what justice soever there is in this passion1 we are yet to consider whether it turns to account or no3 does any one think to curb them1 with all his industry8 ,pone seram2 cohibe3 sed quis custodiet ipsos ,custodes8 cauta est1 et ab illis incipit uxor4 ,put on a lock2 shut them up under a guard2 but who shall guard the guard8 she knows what she is about1 and begins with them4 --,juvenal1 vi4 #cdf4 ,what commodity will not serve their turn1 in so knowing an age8 ,curiosity is vicious throughout2 but 'tis pernicious here4 ',tis folly to examine into a disease for which there is no physic that does not inflame and make it worse2 of which the shame grows still greater and more public by jealousy1 and of which the revenge more wounds our children than it heals us4 ,you wither and die in the search of so obscure a proof4 ,how miserably have they of my time arrived at that knowledge who have been so unhappy as to have found it out8 ,if the informer does not at the same time apply a remedy and bring relief1 'tis an injurious information1 and that better deserves a stab than the lie4 ,we no less laugh at him who takes pains to prevent it1 than at him who is a cuckold and knows it not4 ,the character of cuckold is indelible3 who once has it carries it to his grave2 the punishment proclaims it more than the fault4 ,it is to much purpose to drag out of obscurity and doubt our private misfortunes1 thence to expose them on tragic scaffolds2 and misfortunes that only hurt us by being known2 for we say a good wife or a happy marriage1 not that they are really so1 but because no one says to the contrary4 ,men should be so discreet as to evade this tormenting and unprofitable knowledge3 and the ,romans had a custom1 when returning from any expedition1 to send home before to acquaint their wives with their coming1 that they might not surprise them2 and to this purpose it is that a certain nation has introduced a custom1 that the priest shall on the wedding-day open the way to the bride1 to free the husband from the doubt and curiosity of examining in the first assault1 whether she comes a virgin to his bed1 or has been at the trade before4 ,but the world will be talking4 ,i know1 a hundred honest men cuckolds1 honestly and not unbeseemingly2 a worthy man is pitied1 not disesteemed for it4 ,order it so that your virtue may conquer your misfortune2 that good men may curse the occasion1 and that he who wrongs you may tremble but to think on't4 ,and1 moreover1 who escapes being talked of at the same rate1 from the least even to the greatest8 ,tot qui legionibus imperitivit ,et melior quam to multis fuit1 improbe1 rebus4 ,many who have commanded legions1 many a man much better far than you1 you rascal4--,lucretius1 iii4 #ajci1 #ajda4 ,seest thou how many honest men are reproached with this in thy presence2 believe that thou art no more spared elsewhere4 ,but1 the very ladies will be laughing too2 and what are they so apt to laugh at in this virtuous age of ours as at a peaceable and well-composed marriage8 ,each amongst you has made somebody cuckold2 and nature runs much in parallel1 in compensation1 and turn for turn4 ,the frequency of this accident ought long since to have made it more easy2 'tis now passed into custom4 ,miserable passion6 which has this also1 that it is incommunicable1 ,fors etiam nostris invidit questibus aures2 ,fortune also refuses ear to our complaints4 --,catullus1 lxvii4 for to what friend dare you intrust your griefs1 who1 if he does not laugh at them1 will not make use of the occasion to get a share of the quarry8 ,the sharps1 as well as the sweets of marriage1 are kept secret by the wise2 and amongst its other troublesome conditions this to a prating fellow1 as ,i am1 is one of the chief1 that custom has rendered it indecent and prejudicial to communicate to any one all that a man knows and all that a man feels4 ,to give women the same counsel against jealousy would be so much time lost2 their very being is so made up of suspicion1 vanity1 and curiosity1 that to cure them by any legitimate way is not to be hoped4 ,they often recover of this infirmity by a form of health much more to be feared than the disease itself2 for as there are enchantments that cannot take away the evil but by throwing it upon another1 they also willingly transfer this ever to their husbands1 when they shake it off themselves4 ,and yet ,i know not1 to speak truth1 whether a man can suffer worse from them than their jealousy2 'tis the most dangerous of all their conditions1 as the head is of all their members4 ,pittacus used to say1--,plutarch1 ,on ,contentment1 c4 ,,ii4-- that every one had his trouble1 and that his was the jealous head of his wife2 but for which he should think himself perfectly happy4 ,a mighty inconvenience1 sure1 which could poison the whole life of so just1 so wise1 and so valiant a man2 what must we other little fellows do8 ,the senate of ,marseilles had reason to grant him his request who begged leave to kill himself that he might be delivered from the clamour of his wife2 for 'tis a mischief that is never removed but by removing the whole piece2 and that has no remedy but flight or patience1 though both of them very hard4 ,he was1 methinks1 an understanding fellow who said1 'twas a happy marriage betwixt a blind wife and a deaf husband4 ,let us also consider whether the great and violent severity of obligation we enjoin them does not produce two effects contrary to our design namely1 whether it does not render the pursuants more eager to attack1 and the women more easy to yield4 ,for as to the first1 by raising the value of the place1 we raise the value and the desire of the conquest4 ,might it not be ,venus herself1 who so cunningly enhanced the price of her merchandise1 by making the laws her bawds2 knowing how insipid a delight it would be that was not heightened by fancy and hardness to achieve8 ,in short1 'tis all swine's flesh1 varied by sauces1 as ,flaminius' host said4 ,cupid is a roguish god1 who makes it his sport to contend with devotion and justice3 'tis his glory that his power mates all powers1 and that all other rules give place to his3 ,materiam culpae prosequiturque suae4 ,and seeks out a matter 7motive7 for his crimes4 --,ovid1 ,trist41 iv4 ,i4 #cd4 ,as to the second point2 should we not be less cuckolds1 if we less feared to be so8 according to the humour of women whom interdiction incites1 and who are more eager1 being forbidden3 ,ubi velis1 nolunt2 ubi nolis1 volunt ultro2 ,concessa pudet ire via4 ,where thou wilt1 they won't2 where thou wilt not1 they spontaneously agree2 they are ashamed to go in the permitted path4 --,terence1 ,eunuchus1 act iv41 sc4 #h1 v #dc ,what better interpretation can we make of ,messalina's behaviour8 ,she1 at first1 made her husband a cuckold in private1 as is the common use2 but1 bringing her business about with too much ease1 by reason of her husband's stupidity1 she soon scorned that way1 and presently fell to making open love1 to own her lovers1 and to favour and entertain them in the sight of all3 she would make him know and see how she used him4 ,this animal1 not to be roused with all this1 and rendering her pleasures dull and flat by his too stupid facility1 by which he seemed to authorise and make them lawful2 what does she8 ,being the wife of a living and healthful emperor1 and at ,rome1 the theatre of the world1 in the face of the sun1 and with solemn ceremony1 and to ,silius1 who had long before enjoyed her1 she publicly marries herself one day that her husband was gone out of the city4 ,does it not seem as if she was going to become chaste by her husband's negligence8 or that she sought another husband who might sharpen her appetite by his jealousy1 and who by watching should incite her8 ,but the first difficulty she met with was also the last3 this beast suddenly roused these sleepy1 sluggish sort of men are often the most dangerous3 ,i have found by experience that this extreme toleration1 when it comes to dissolve1 produces the most severe revenge2 for taking fire on a sudden1 anger and fury being combined in one1 discharge their utmost force at the first onset1 ,irarumque omnes effundit habenas3 ,he let loose his whole fury4--,a,eneid1 xii4 #dii4 he put her to death1 and with her a great number of those with whom she had intelligence1 and even one of them who could not help it1 and whom she had caused to be forced to her bed with scourges4 ,what ,virgil says of ,venus and ,vulcan1 ,lucretius had better expressed of a stolen enjoyment betwixt her and ,mars3 ,belli fera moenera ,mavors ,armipotens regit1 ingremium qui saepe tuum se ,rejictt1 aeterno devinctus vulnere amoris 4444444444444444444444444444 ,pascit amore avidos inhians in te1 ,dea1 visus1 ,eque tuo pendet resupini spiritus ore ,hunc tu1 ,diva1 tuo recubantem corpore sancto ,circumfusa super1 suaveis ex ore loquelas ,funde4 ,mars1 the god of wars1 who controls the cruel tasks of war1 often reclines on thy bosom1 and greedily drinks love at both his eyes1 vanquished by the eternal wound of love3 and his breath1 as he reclines1 hangs on thy lips2 bending thy head over him as he lies upon thy sacred person1 pour forth sweet and persuasive words4 --,lucretius1 i4 #bc4 ,when ,i consider this rejicit1 fiascit1 inhians1 ynolli1 fovet1 medullas1 labefacta1 pendet1 percurrit1 and that noble circumfusa1 mother of the pretty infuses2 ,i disdain those little quibbles and verbal allusions that have since sprung up4 ,those worthy people stood in need of no subtlety to disguise their meaning2 their language is downright1 and full of natural and continued vigour2 they are all epigram2 not only the tail1 but the head1 body1 and feet4 ,there is nothing forced1 nothing languishing1 but everything keeps the same pace3 ,contextus totes virilis est2 non sunt circa flosculos occupati4 ,the whole contexture is manly2 they don't occupy themselves with little flowers of rhetoric4--,seneca1 ,ep41 #cc4 ',tis not a soft eloquence1 and without offence only2 'tis nervous and solid1 that does not so much please1 as it fills and ravishes the greatest minds4 ,when ,i see these brave forms of expression1 so lively1 so profound1 ,i do not say that 'tis well said1 but well thought4 ',tis the sprightliness of the imagination that swells and elevates the words3 ,pectus est quod disertum ,tacit4 ,the heart makes the man eloquent4--,quintilian1 x4 #g4 ,our people call language1 judgment1 and fine words1 full conceptions4 ,this painting is not so much carried on by dexterity of hand as by having the object more vividly imprinted in the soul4 ,gallus speaks simply because he conceives simply3 ,horace does not content himself with a superficial expression2 that would betray him2 he sees farther and more clearly into things2 his mind breaks into and rummages all the magazine of words and figures wherewith to express himself1 and he must have them more than ordinary1 because his conception is so4 ,plutarch says' that he sees the ,latin tongue by the things3 'tis here the same3 the sense illuminates and produces the words1 no more words of air1 but of flesh and bone2 they signify more than they say4 ,moreover1 those who are not well skilled in a language present some image of this2 for in ,italy ,i said whatever ,i had a mind to in common discourse1 but in more serious talk1 ,i durst not have trusted myself with an idiom that ,i could not wind and turn out of its ordinary pace2 ,i would have a power of introducing something of my own4 ,the handling and utterance of fine wits is that which sets off language2 not so much by innovating it1 as by putting it to more vigorous and various services1 and by straining1 bending1 and adapting it to them4 ,they do not create words1 but they enrich their own1 and give them weight and signification by the uses they put them to1 and teach them unwonted motions1 but withal ingeniously and discreetly4 ,and how little this talent is given to all is manifest by the many ,french scribblers of this age3 they are bold and proud enough not to follow the common road1 but want of invention and discretion ruins them2 there is nothing seen in their writings but a wretched affectation of a strange new style1 with cold and absurd disguises1 which1 instead of elevating1 depress the matter3 provided they can but trick themselves out with new words1 they care not what they signify2 and to bring in a new word by the head and shoulders1 they leave the old one1 very often more sinewy and significant than the other4 ,there is stuff enough in our language1 but there is a defect in cutting out3 for there is nothing that might not be made out of our terms of hunting and war1 which is a fruitful soil to borrow from2 and forms of speaking1 like herbs1 improve and grow stronger by being transplanted4 ,i find it sufficiently abundant1 but not sufficiently pliable and vigorous2 it commonly quails under a powerful conception2 if you would maintain the dignity of your style1 you will often perceive it to flag and languish under you1 and there ,latin steps in to its relief1 as ,greek does to others4 ,of some of these words ,i have just picked out we do not so easily discern the energy1 by reason that the frequent use of them has in some sort abased their beauty1 and rendered it common2 as in our ordinary language there are many excellent phrases and metaphors to be met with1 of which the beauty is withered by age1 and the colour is sullied by too common handling2 but that nothing lessens the relish to an understanding man1 nor does it derogate from the glory of those ancient authors who1 'tis likely1 first brought those words into that lustre4 ,the sciences treat of things too refinedly1 after an artificial1 very different from the common and natural1 way4 ,my page makes love1 and understands it2 but read to him ,leo ,hebraeus--,leo the ,jew1 ,ficinus1 ,cardinal ,bembo1 and ,mario ,equicola all wrote ,treatises on ,love4-- and ,ficinus1 where they speak of love1 its thoughts and actions1 he understands it not4 ,i do not find in ,aristotle most of my ordinary motions2 they are there covered and disguised in another robe for the use of the schools4 ,good speed them6 were ,i of the trade1 ,i would as much naturalise art as they artificialise nature4 ,let us let ,bembo and ,equicola alone4 ,when ,i write1 ,i can very well spare both the company and the remembrance of books1 lest they should interrupt my progress2 and also1 in truth1 the best authors too much humble and discourage me3 ,i am very much of the painter's mind1 who1 having represented cocks most wretchedly ill1 charged all his boys not to suffer any natural cock to come into his shop2 and had rather need to give myself a little lustre1 of the invention of ,antigenides the musician1 who1 when he was asked to sing or play1 took care beforehand that the auditory should1 either before or after1 be satiated with some other ill musicians4 ,but ,i can hardly be without ,plutarch2 he is so universal and so full1 that upon all occasions1 and what extravagant subject soever you take in hand1 he will still be at your elbow1 and hold out to you a liberal and not to be exhausted hand of riches and embellishments4 ,it vexes me that he is so exposed to be the spoil of those who are conversant with him3 ,i can scarce cast an eye upon him but ,i purloin either a leg or a wing4 ,and also for this design of mine 'tis convenient for me for me to write at home1 in a wild country1 where ,i have nobody to assist or relieve me2 where ,i hardly see a man who understands the ,latin of his ,paternoster1 and of ,french a little less4 ,i might have made it better elsewhere1 but then the work would have been less my own2 and its principal end and perfection is to be exactly mine4 ,i readily correct an accidental error1 of which ,i am full1 as ,i run carelessly on2 but for my ordinary and constant imperfections1 it were a kind of treason to put them out4 ,when another tells me1 or that ,i say to myself1 ,thou art too thick of figures3 this is a word of rough ,gascon3 that is a dangerous phrase 7,i do not reject any of those that are used in the common streets of ,france2 they who would fight custom with grammar are triflers73 this is an ignorant discourse3 this is a paradoxical discourse3 that is going too far3 thou makest thyself too merry at times3 men will think thou sayest a thing in good earnest which thou only speakest in jest4--,yes1 ,i know1 but ,i correct the faults of inadvertence1 not those of custom4 ,do ,i not talk at the same rate throughout8 ,do ,i not represent myself to the life8 ',tis enough that ,i have done what ,i designed2 all the world knows me in my book1 and my book in me4 ,now ,i have an apish1 imitative quality3 when ,i used to write verses 7and ,i never made any but ,latin71 they evidently discovered the poet ,i had last read1 and some of my first essays have a little exotic taste3 ,i speak something another kind of language at ,paris than ,i do at ,montaigne4 ,whoever ,i steadfastly look upon easily leaves some impression of his upon me2 whatever ,i consider ,i usurp1 whether a foolish countenance1 a disagreeable look1 or a ridiculous way of speaking2 and vices most of all1 because they seize and stick to me1 and will not leave hold without shaking4 ,i swear more by imitation than by complexion3 a murderous imitation1 like that of the apes so terrible both in stature and strength1 that ,alexander met with in a certain country of the ,indies1 and which he would have had much ado any other way to have subdued2 but they afforded him the means by that inclination of theirs to imitate whatever they saw done2 for by that the hunters were taught to put on shoes in their sight1 and to tie them fast with many knots1 and to muffle up their heads in caps all composed of running nooses1 and to seem to anoint their eyes with glue2 so did those poor beasts employ their imitation to their own ruin they glued up their own eyes1 haltered and bound themselves4 ,the other faculty of playing the mimic1 and ingeniously acting the words and gestures of another1 purposely to make people merry and to raise their admiration1 is no more in me than in a stock4 ,when ,i swear my own oath1 'tis only1 by ,god6 of all oaths the most direct4 ,they say that ,socrates swore by the dog2 ,zeno had for his oath the same interjection at this time in use amongst the ,italians1 ,cappari6 ,pythagoras swore ,by water and air4 ,i am so apt1 without thinking of it1 to receive these superficial impressions1 that if ,i have ,majesty or ,highness in my mouth three days together1 they come out instead of ,excellency and ,lordship eight days after2 and what ,i say to-day in sport and fooling ,i shall say the same to-morrow seriously4 ,wherefore1 in writing1 ,i more unwillingly undertake beaten arguments1 lest ,i should handle them at another's expense4 ,every subject is equally fertile to me3 a fly will serve the purpose1 and 'tis well if this ,i have in hand has not been undertaken at the recommendation of as flighty a will4 ,i may begin1 with that which pleases me best1 for the subjects are all linked to one another4 ,but my soul displeases me1 in that it ordinarily produces its deepest and most airy conceits and which please me best1 when ,i least expect or study for them1 and which suddenly vanish1 having at the instant1 nothing to apply them to2 on horseback1 at table1 and in bed3 but most on horseback1 where ,i am most given to think4 ,my speaking is a little nicely jealous of silence and attention3 if ,i am talking my best1 whoever interrupts me1 stops me4 ,in travelling1 the necessity of the way will often put a stop to discourse2 besides which ,i1 for the most part1 travel without company fit for regular discourses1 by which means ,i have all the leisure ,i would to entertain myself4 ,it falls out as it does in my dreams2 whilst dreaming ,i recommend them to my memory 7for ,i am apt to dream that ,i dream71 but1 the next morning1 ,i may represent to myself of what complexion they were1 whether gay1 or sad1 or strange1 but what they were1 as to the rest1 the more ,i endeavour to retrieve them1 the deeper ,i plunge them in oblivion4 ,so of thoughts that come accidentally into my head1 ,i have no more but a vain image remaining in my memory2 only enough to make me torment myself in their quest to no purpose4 ,well1 then1 laying books aside1 and more simply and materially speaking1 ,i find1 after all1 that ,love is nothing else but the thirst of enjoying the object desired1 or ,venus any other thing than the pleasure of discharging one's vessels1 just as the pleasure nature gives in discharging other parts1 that either by immoderation or indiscretion become vicious4 ,according to ,socrates1 love is the appetite of generation by the mediation of beauty4 ,and when ,i consider the ridiculous titillation of this pleasure1 the absurd1 crack-brained1 wild motions with which it inspires ,zeno and ,cratippus1 the indiscreet rage1 the countenance inflamed with fury and cruelty in the sweetest effects of love1 and then that austere air1 so grave1 severe1 ecstatic1 in so wanton an action2 that our delights and our excrements are promiscuously shuffled together2 and that the supreme pleasure brings along with it1 as in pain1 fainting and complaining2 ,i believe it to be true1 as ,plato says1 that the gods made man for their sport3 ,quaenam ista jocandi ,saevitia6 ,with a sportive cruelty 7,or37 ,what an unkindness there is in jesting6--,claudian in ,eutrop4 i4 #bd4 and that it was in mockery that nature has ordered the most agitative of actions and the most common1 to make us equal1 and to put fools and wise men1 beasts and us1 on a level4 ,even the most contemplative and prudent man1 when ,i imagine him in this posture1 ,i hold him an impudent fellow to pretend to be prudent and contemplative2 they are the peacocks' feet that abate his pride3 ,ridentem dicere verum ,quid vetat8 ,what prevents us from speaking truth with a smile8 --,horace1 ,sat41 i4 ,i1 #bd4 ,they who banish serious imaginations from their sports1 do1 says one1 like him who dares not adore the statue of a saint1 if not covered with a veil4 ,we eat and drink1 indeed1 as beasts do2 but these are not actions that obstruct the functions of the soul1 in these we maintain our advantage over them2 this other action subjects all other thought1 and by its imperious authority makes an ass of all ,plato's divinity and philosophy2 and yet there is no complaint of it4 ,in everything else a man may keep some decorum1 all other operations submit to the rules of decency2 this cannot so much as in imagination appear other than vicious or ridiculous3 find out1 if you can1 therein any serious and discreet procedure4 ,alexander said1 that he chiefly knew himself to be mortal by this act and sleeping2 sleep suffocates and suppresses the faculties of the soul2 the familiarity with women likewise dissipates and exhausts them3 doubtless 'tis a mark1 not only of our original corruption1 but also of our vanity and deformity4 ,on the one side1 nature pushes us on to it1 having fixed the most noble1 useful1 and pleasant of all her functions to this desire3 and1 on the other side1 leaves us to accuse and avoid it1 as insolent and indecent1 to blush at it1 and to recommend abstinence4 ,are we not brutes to call that work brutish which begets us8 ,people of so many differing religions have concurred in several proprieties1 as sacrifices1 lamps1 burning incense1 fasts1 and offerings2 and amongst others1 in the condemning this act3 all opinions tend that way1 besides the widespread custom of circumcision1 which may be regarded as a punishment4 ,we have1 peradventure1 reason to blame ourselves for being guilty of so foolish a production as man1 and to call the act1 and the parts that are employed in the act1 shameful 7mine1 truly1 are now shameful and pitiful74 ,the ,essenians1 of whom ,pliny speaks1 kept up their country for several ages without either nurse or baby-clouts1 by the arrival of strangers who1 following this pretty humour1 came continually to them3 a whole nation being resolute1 rather to hazard a total extermination1 than to engage themselves in female embraces1 and rather to lose the succession of men1 than to beget one4 ',tis said1 that ,zeno never had to do with a woman but once in his life1 and then out of civility1 that he might not seem too obstinately to disdain the sex4 ,diogenes ,laertius1 vii4 #ac4--,what is there said1 however1 is that ,zeno seldom had commerce with boys1 lest he should be deemed a very misogynist4 ,every one avoids seeing a man born1 every one runs to see him die2 to destroy him a spacious field is sought out in the face of the sun1 but1 to make him1 we creep into as dark and private a corner as we can3 'tis a man's duty to withdraw himself bashfully from the light to create2 but 'tis glory and the fountain of many virtues to know how to destroy what we have made3 the one is injury1 the other favour3 for ,aristotle says that to do any one a kindness1 in a certain phrase of his country1 is to kill him4 ,the ,athenians1 to couple the disgrace of these two actions1 having to purge the ,isle of ,delos1 and to justify themselves to ,apollo1 interdicted at once all births and burials in the precincts thereof3 ,nostri nosmet paenitet4 ,we are ashamed of ourselves4--,terence1 ,phoymio1 i4 #c1 #bj4 ,there are some nations that will not be seen to eat4 ,i know a lady1 and of the best quality1 who has the same opinion1 that chewing disfigures the face1 and takes away much from the ladies' grace and beauty2 and therefore unwillingly appears at a public table with an appetite2 and ,i know a man also1 who cannot endure to see another eat1 nor himself to be seen eating1 and who is more shy of company when putting in than when putting out4 ,in the ,turkish empire1 there are a great number of men who1 to excel others1 never suffer themselves to be seen when they make their repast3 who never have any more than one a week2 who cut and mangle their faces and limbs2 who never speak to any one3 fanatic people who think to honour their nature by disnaturing themselves2 who value themselves upon their contempt of themselves1 and purport to grow better by being worse4 ,what monstrous animal is this1 that is a horror to himself1 to whom his delights are grievous1 and who weds himself to misfortune8 ,there are people who conceal their life3 ,exilioque domos et dulcia limina mutant1 ,and change for exile their homes and pleasant abodes4 --,virgil1 ,georg41 ii4 #eaa4 and withdraw them from the sight of other men2 who avoid health and cheerfulness1 as dangerous and prejudicial qualities4 ,not only many sects1 but many peoples1 curse their birth1 and bless their death2 and there is a place where the sun is abominated and darkness adored4 ,we are only ingenious in using ourselves ill3 'tis the real quarry our intellects fly at2 and intellect1 when misapplied1 is a dangerous tool6 ,o miseri6 quorum gaudia crimen habent6 ,o wretched men1 whose pleasures are a crime6 --,pseudo ,gallus1 i4 #ahj4 ,alas1 poor man6 thou hast enough inconveniences that are inevitable1 without increasing them by throe own invention2 and art miserable enough by nature1 without being so by art2 thou hast real and essential deformities enough1 without forging those that are imaginary4 ,dost thou think thou art too much at ease unless half thy ease is uneasy8 dost thou find that thou hast not performed all the necessary offices that nature has enjoined thee1 and that she is idle in thee1 if thou dost not oblige thyself to other and new offices8 ,thou dost not stick to infringe her universal and undoubted laws2 but stickest to thy own special and fantastic rules1 and by how much more particular1 uncertain1 and contradictory they are1 by so much thou employest thy whole endeavour in them3 the laws of thy parish occupy and bind thee3 those of ,god and the world concern thee not4 ,run but a little over the examples of this kind2 thy life is full of them4 ,whilst the verses of these two poets1 treat so reservedly and discreetly of wantonness as they do1 methinks they discover it much more openly4 ,ladies cover their necks with network1 priests cover several sacred things1 and painters shadow their pictures to give them greater lustre3 and 'tis said that the sun and wind strike more violently by reflection than in a direct line4 ,the ,egyptian wisely answered him who asked him what he had under his cloak1 ,it is hid under my cloak1 said he1 that thou mayest not know what it is3 but there are certain other things that people hide only to show them4 ,hear that one1 who speaks plainer1 ,et nudum pressi corpus ad usque meum3 ,and pressed her naked body to mine 7,or37 ,my body ,i applied even to her naked side--,ovid1 ,amor41 i4 #e1 #bd4 methinks that he emasculates me4 ,let ,martial turn up ,venus as high as he may1 he cannot shew her so naked3 he who says all that is to be said gluts and disgusts us4 ,he who is afraid to express himself1 draws us on to guess at more than is meant2 there is treachery in this sort of modesty1 and specially when they half open1 as these do1 so fair a path to imagination4 ,both the action and description should relish of theft4 ,the more respectful1 more timorous1 more coy1 and secret love of the ,spaniards and ,italians pleases me4 ,i know not who of old wished his throat as long as that of a crane1 that he might the longer taste what he swallowed2 it had been better wished as to this quick and precipitous pleasure1 especially in such natures as mine that have the fault of being too prompt4 ,to stay its flight and delay it with preambles3 all things --a glance1 a bow1 a word1 a sign1 stand for favour and recompense betwixt them4 ,were it not an excellent piece of thrift in him who could dine on the steam of the roast8 ',tis a passion that mixes with very little solid essence1 far more vanity and feverish raving2 and we should serve and pay it accordingly4 ,let us teach the ladies to set a better value and esteem upon themselves1 to amuse and fool us3 we give the last charge at the first onset2 the ,french impetuosity will still show itself2 by spinning out their favours1 and exposing them in small parcels1 even miserable old age itself will find some little share of reward1 according to its worth and merit4 ,he who has no fruition but in fruition1 who wins nothing unless he sweeps the stakes1 who takes no pleasure in the chase but in the quarry1 ought not to introduce himself in our school3 the more steps and degrees there are1 so much higher and more honourable is the uppermost seat3 we should take a pleasure in being conducted to it1 as in magnificent palaces1 by various porticoes and passages1 long and pleasant galleries1 and many windings4 ,this disposition of things would turn to our advantage2 we should there longer stay and longer love2 without hope and without desire we proceed not worth a pin4 ,our conquest and entire possession is what they ought infinitely to dread3 when they wholly surrender themselves up to the mercy of our fidelity and constancy they run a mighty hazard2 they are virtues very rare and hard to be found2 the ladies are no sooner ours1 than we are no more theirs3 ,postquam cupidae mentis satiata libido est1 ,verba nihil metuere1 nihil perjuria curant2 ,when our desires are once satisfied1 we care little for oaths and promises4--,catullus1 lxiv4 #adg4 ,and ,thrasonides1 a young man of ,greece1 was so in love with his passion that1 having1 gained a mistress's consent1 he refused to enjoy her1 that he might not by fruition quench and stupefy the unquiet ardour of which he was so proud1 and with which he so fed himself4 ,dearness is a good sauce to meat3 do but observe how much the manner of salutation1 particular to our nation1 has1 by its facilities1 made kisses1 which ,socrates says are so powerful and dangerous for the stealing of hearts1 of no esteem4 ,it is a displeasing custom and injurious for the ladies1 that they must be obliged to lend their lips to every fellow who has three footmen at his heels1 however ill-favoured he may be in himself3 ,cujus livida naribus caninis ,dependet glacies1 rigetque barba 4 4 4 ,centum occurrere malo culilingis3 ,martial1 vii4 #id4 and we ourselves barely gain by it2 for as the world is divided1 for three beautiful women we must kiss fifty ugly ones2 and to a tender stomach1 like those of my age1 an ill kiss overpays a good one4 ,in ,italy they passionately court even their common women who sell themselves for money1 and justify the doing so by saying1 that there are degrees of fruition1 and that by such service they would procure for themselves that which is most entire2 the women sell nothing but their bodies2 the will is too free and too much of its own to be exposed to sale4 ,so that these say1 'tis the will they undertake and they have reason4 ',tis indeed the will that we are to serve and gain by wooing4 ,i abhor to imagine mine1 a body without affection3 and this madness is1 methinks1 cousin-german to that of the boy who would needs pollute the beautiful statue of ,venus made by ,praxiteles2 or that of the furious ,egyptian1 who violated the dead carcase of a woman he was embalming3 which was the occasion of the law then made in ,egypt1 that the corpses of beautiful young women1 of those of good quality1 should be kept three days before they should be delivered to those whose office it was to take care for the interment4 ,periander did more wonderfully1 who extended his conjugal affection 7more regular and legitimate7 to the enjoyment of his wife ,melissa after she was dead4 ,does it not seem a lunatic humour in the ,moon1 seeing she could no otherwise enjoy her darling ,endymion1 to lay-him for several months asleep1 and to please herself with the fruition of a boy who stirred not but in his sleep8 ,i likewise say that we love a body without a soul or sentiment when we love a body without its consent and desire4 ,all enjoyments are not alike3 there are some that are hectic and languishing3 a thousand other causes besides good-will may procure us this favour from the ladies2 this is not a sufficient testimony of affection3 treachery may lurk there1 as well as elsewhere3 they sometimes go to't by halves3 ,tanquam thura merumque parent ,absentem marmoreamve putes3 ,as if they are preparing frankincense and wine 4 4 4 you might think her absent or marble4--,martial1 xi4 #ajc1 #ab1 and #ei1 #h4 ,i know some who had rather lend that than their coach1 and who only impart themselves that way4 ,you are to examine whether your company pleases them upon any other account1 or1 as some strong-chined groom1 for that only2 in what degree of favour and esteem you are with them3 ,tibi si datur uni1 ,quem lapide illa diem candidiore notat4 ,wherefore that is enough1 if that day alone is given us which she marks with a whiter stone4--,catullus1 lxviii4 #adg4 ,what if they eat your bread with the sauce of a more pleasing imagination4 ,te tenet1 absentes alios suspirat amores4 ,she has you in her arms2 her thoughts are with other absent lovers4--,tibullus1 i4 #f1 #ce4 ,what8 have we not seen one in these days of ours who made use of this act for the purpose of a most horrid revenge1 by that means to kill and poison1 as he did1 a worthy lady8 ,such as know ,italy will not think it strange if1 for this subject1 ,i seek not elsewhere for examples2 for that nation may be called the regent of the world in this4 ,they have more generally handsome and fewer ugly women than we2 but for rare and excellent beauties we have as many as they4 ,i think the same of their intellects3 of those of the common sort1 they have evidently far more brutishness is immeasurably rarer there2 but in individual characters of the highest form1 we are nothing indebted to them4 ,if ,i should carry on the comparison1 ,i might say1 as touching valour1 that1 on the contrary1 it is1 to what it is with them1 common and natural with us2 but sometimes we see them possessed of it to such a degree as surpasses the greatest examples we can produce3 ,the marriages of that country are defective in this2 their custom commonly imposes so rude and so slavish a law upon the women1 that the most distant acquaintance with a stranger is as capital an offence as the most intimate2 so that all approaches being rendered necessarily substantial1 and seeing that all comes to one account1 they have no hard choice to make2 and when they have broken down the fence1 we may safely presume they get on fire3 ,luxuria ipsis vinculis1 sicut fera bestia1 irritata1 deinde emissa4 ,lust1 like a wild beast1 being more excited by being bound1 breaks from his chains with greater wildness4--,livy1 xxxiv4 #d4 ,they must give them a little more rein3 ,vidi ego nuper equum1 contra sua frena tenacem1 ,ore reluctanti fulminis ire modo3 ,i saw1 the other day1 a horse struggling against his bit1 rush like a thunderbolt4--,ovid1 ,amor41 iii4 #d1 #ac4 the desire of company is allayed by giving it a little liberty4 ,we are pretty much in the same case they are extreme in constraint1 we in licence4 ',tis a good custom we have in ,france that our sons are received into the best families1 there to be entertained and bred up pages1 as in a school of nobility2 and 'tis looked upon as a discourtesy and an affront to refuse this to a gentleman4 ,i have taken notice 7for1 so many families1 so many differing forms7 that the ladies who have been strictest with their maids have had no better luck than those who allowed them a greater liberty4 ,there should be moderation in these things2 one must leave a great deal of their conduct to their own discretion2 for1 when all comes to all1 no discipline can curb them throughout4 ,but it is true withal that she who comes off with flying colours from a school of liberty1 brings with her whereon to repose more confidence than she who comes away sound from a severe and strict school4 ,our fathers dressed up their daughters' looks in bashfulness and fear 7their courage and desires being the same72 we ours in confidence and assurance2 we understand nothing of the matter2 we must leave it to the ,sarmatian women1 who may not lie with a man till with their own hands they have first killed another in battle4 ,for me1 who have no other title left me to these things but by the ears1 'tis sufficient if1 according to the privilege of my age1 they retain me for one of their counsel4 ,i advise them then1 and us men too1 to abstinence2 but if the age we live in will not endure it1 at least modesty and discretion4 ,for1 as in the story of ,aristippus1 who1 speaking to some young men who blushed to see him go into a scandalous house1 said the vice is in not coming out1 not in going in1 let her who has no care of her conscience have yet some regard to her reputation2 and though she be rotten within1 let her carry a fair outside at least4 ,i commend a gradation and delay in bestowing their favours3 ,plato 'declares that1 in all sorts of love1 facility and promptness are forbidden to the defendant4 ',tis a sign of eagerness which they ought to disguise with all the art they have1 so rashly1 wholly1 and hand-over-hand to surrender themselves4 ,in carrying themselves orderly and measuredly in the granting their last favours1 they much more allure our desires and hide their own4 ,let them still fly before us1 even those who have most mind to be overtaken3 they better conquer us by flying1 as the ,scythians did4 ,to say the truth1 according to the law that nature has imposed upon them1 it is not properly for them either to will or desire2 their part is to suffer1 obey1 and consent and for this it is that nature has given them a perpetual capacity1 which in us is but at times and uncertain2 they are always fit for the encounter1 that they may be always ready when we are so ,pati natee4-,born to suffer4-,seneca1 ,ep41 #ie4--;,and whereas she has ordered that our appetites shall be manifest by a prominent demonstration1 she would have theirs to be hidden and concealed within1 and has furnished them with parts improper for ostentation1 and simply defensive4 ,such proceedings as this that follows must be left to the ,amazonian licence3 ,alexander marching his army through ,hyrcania1 ,thalestris1 ,queen of the ,amazons1 came with three hundred light horse of her own-sex1 well mounted1 and armed1 having left the remainder of a very great1 army that followed her behind the neighbouring mountains to give him a visit2 where she publicly and in plain terms told him that the fame of his valour and victories had brought her thither to see him1 and to make him an offer of her forces to assist him in the pursuit of his enterprises2 and that1 finding him so handsome1 young1 and vigorous1 she1 who was also perfect in all those qualities1 advised that they might lie together1 to the end that from the most valiant woman of the world and the bravest man then living1 there might spring some great and wonderful issue for the time to come4 ,alexander returned her thanks for all the rest2 but1 to give leisure for the accomplishment of her last demand1 he detained her thirteen days in that place1 which were spent in royal feasting and jollity1 for the welcome of so courageous a princess4 ,we are1 almost throughout1 unjust judges of their actions1 as they are of ours4 ,i confess the truth when it makes against me1 as well as when 'tis on my side4 ',tis an abominable intemperance that pushes them on so often to change1 and that will not let them limit their affection to any one person whatever2 as is evident in that goddess to whom are attributed so many changes and so many lovers4 ,but 'tis true withal that 'tis contrary to the nature of love if it be1 not violent2 and contrary to the nature of violence if it be constant4 ,and they who wonder1 exclaim1 and keep such a clutter to find out the causes of this frailty of theirs1 as unnatural and not to be believed1 how comes it to pass they do not discern how often they are themselves guilty of the same1 without any astonishment or miracle at all8 ,it would1 peradventure1 be more strange to see the passion fixed2 'tis not a simply corporeal passion4 ,if there be no end to avarice and ambition1 there is doubtless no more in desire2 it still lives after satiety2 and 'tis impossible to prescribe either constant satisfaction or end2 it ever goes beyond its possession4 ,and by that means inconstancy1 peradventure1 is in some sort more pardonable in them than in us3 they may plead1 as well as we1 the inclination to variety and novelty common to us both2 and secondly1 without us1 that they buy a cat in a sack3 ,joanna1 queen of ,naples1 caused her first husband1 ,andrews1 to be hanged at the bars of her window in a halter of gold and silk woven with her own hand1 because in matrimonial performances she neither found his parts nor abilities answer the expectation she had conceived from his stature1 beauty1 youth1 and activity1 by which she had been caught and deceived4 ,they may say there is more pains required in doing than in suffering2 and so they are on their part always at least provided for necessity1 whereas on our part it may fall out otherwise4 ,for this reason it was1 that ,plato wisely made a law that before marriage1 to determine of the fitness of persons1 the judges should see the young men who pretended to it stripped stark naked1 and the women but to the girdle only4 ,when they come to try us they do not1 perhaps1 find us worthy of their choice3 ,experta latus1 madidoque simillima loro ,inguina1 nec lassa stare coacta manu1 ,deserit imbelles thalamos4 ,after using every endeavour to arouse him to action1 she quits the barren couch4--,martial1 vii4 #eh4 ',tis not enough that a man's will be good2 weakness and insufficiency lawfully break a marriage1 ,et quaerendum aliunde foret nervosius illud1 ,quod posset zonam solvere virgineam3 ,and seeks a more vigorous lover to undo her virgin zone4 --,catullus1 lxvii4 #bg4 why not8 and according to her own standard1 an amorous intelligence1 more licentious and active1 ,si blando nequeat superesse labori4 ,if his strength be unequal to the pleasant task4 --,virgil1 ,georg41 iii4 #abg4 ,but is it not great impudence to offer our imperfections and imbecilities1 where we desire to please and leave a good opinion and esteem of ourselves8 ,for the little that ,i am able to do now3 ,ad unum ,mollis opus4 ,fit but for once4--,horace1 ,epod41 xii4 #ae4 ,i would not trouble a woman1 that ,i am to reverence and fear3 ,fuge suspicari1 ,cujus undenum trepidavit aetas ,claudere lustrum4 ,fear not him whose eleventh lustrum is closed4 --,horace1 ,od41 ii4 #d1 #ab1 limits it to the eighth4 ,nature should satisfy herself in having rendered this age miserable1 without rendering it ridiculous too4 ,i hate to see it1 for one poor inch of pitiful vigour which comes upon it but thrice a week1 to strut and set itself out with as much eagerness as if it could do mighty feats2 a true flame of flax2 and laugh to see it so boil and bubble and then in a moment so congealed and extinguished4 ,this appetite ought to appertain only to the flower of beautiful youth3 trust not to its seconding that indefatigable1 full1 constant1 magnanimous ardour you think in you1 for it will certainly leave you in a pretty corner2 but rather transfer it to some tender1 bashful1 and ignorant boy1 who yet trembles at the rod1 and blushes3 ,indum sanguineo veluti violaverit ostro ,si quis ebur1 vel mista rubent ubi lilia multa ,alba rosa4 ,as ,indian ivory streaked with crimson1 or white lilies mixed with the damask rose4--,a,eneid1 xii4 #fg4 ,who can stay till the morning without dying for shame to behold the disdain of the fair eyes of her who knows so well his fumbling impertinence1 ,et taciti fecere tamen convicia vultus1 ,though she nothing say1 her looks betray her anger4 --,ovid1 ,amor41 i4 #g1 #ba4 has never had the satisfaction and the glory of having cudgelled them till they were weary1 with the vigorous performance of one heroic night4 ,when ,i have observed any one to be vexed with me1 ,i have not presently accused her levity1 but have been in doubt1 if ,i had not reason rather to complain of nature2 she has doubtless used me very uncivilly and unkindly3 ,si non longa satis1 si non bene mentula crassa ,nimirum sapiunt1 videntque parvam ,matronae quoque mentulam illibenter3 ,the first of these verses is the commencement of an epigram of the ,veterum ,poetayurra ,catalecta1 and the two others are from an epigram in the same collection 7,ad ,matrones74 ,they describe untranslatably ,montaigne's charge against nature1 indicated in the previous passage4 and done me a most enormous injury4 ,every member ,i have1 as much one as another1 is equally my own1 and no other more properly makes me a man than this4 ,i universally owe my entire picture to the public4 ,the wisdom of my instruction consists in liberty1 in truth1 in essence3 disdaining to introduce those little1 feigned1 common1 and provincial rules into the catalogue of its real duties2 all natural1 general1 and constant1 of which civility and ceremony are daughters indeed1 but illegitimate4 ,we are sure to have the vices of appearance1 when we shall have had those of essence3 when we have done with these1 we run full drive upon the others1 if we find it must be so2 for there is danger that we shall fancy new offices1 to excuse our negligence towards the natural ones1 and to confound them3 and to manifest this1 is it not seen that in places where faults are crimes1 crimes are but faults2 that in nations where the laws of decency are most rare and most remiss1 the primitive laws of common reason are better observed3 the innumerable multitude of so many duties stifling and dissipating our care4 ,the application of ourselves to light and trivial things diverts us from those that are necessary and just4 ,oh1 how these superficial men take an easy and plausible way in comparison of ours6 ,these are shadows wherewith we palliate and pay one another2 but we do not pay1 but inflame the reckoning towards that great judge1 who tucks up our rags and tatters above our shameful parts1 and suckles not to view us all over1 even to our inmost and most secret ordures3 it were a useful decency of our maidenly modesty1 could it keep him from this discovery4 ,in fine1 whoever could reclaim man from so scrupulous a verbal superstition1 would do the world no great disservice4 ,our life is divided betwixt folly and prudence3 whoever will write of it but what is reverend and canonical1 will leave above the one-half behind4 ,i do not excuse myself to myself2 and if ,i did1 it should rather be for my excuses that ,i would excuse myself than for any other fault2 ,i excuse myself of certain humours1 which ,i think more strong in number than those that are on my side4 ,in consideration of which1 ,i will further say this 7for ,i desire to please every one1 though it will be hard to do73 ,esse unum hominem accommodatum ad tantam morum ac sermonum et voluntatum varietatem1 ,for a man to conform to such a variety of manners1 discourses1 and will4--,q4 ,cicero1 ,de ,pet4 ,consul1 c4 #ad4 that they ought not to condemn me for what ,i make authorities1 received and approved by so many ages1 to utter3 and that there is no reason that for want of rhyme they should refuse me the liberty they allow even to churchmen of our nation and time1 and these amongst the most notable1 of which here are two of their brisk verses3 ,rimula1 dispeream1 ni monogramma tua est4 ,un vit d'amy la contente et bien traicte3 ,st4 ,gelais1 7,euvres ,poetiques71 p4 #ii1 ed4 of ,lyons1 #aegd4 besides how many others4 ,i love modesty2 and 'tis not out of judgment that ,i have chosen this scandalous way of speaking2 'tis nature that has chosen it for me4 ,i commend it not1 no more than other forms that are contrary to common use3 but ,i excuse it1 and by circumstances both general and particular1 alleviate its accusation4 ,but to proceed4 ,whence1 too1 can proceed that usurpation of sovereign authority you take upon you over the women1 who favour you at their own expense1 ,si furtiva dedit mira munuscula nocte1 ,if1 in the stealthy night1 she has made strange gifts4 --,catullus1 lxviii4 #ade4 so that you presently assume the interest1 coldness1 and authority of a husband8 ',tis a free contract why do you not then keep to it1 as you would have them do8 there is no prescription upon voluntary things4 ',tis against the form1 but it is true withal1 that ,i in my time have conducted this bargain as much as the nature of it would permit1 as conscientiously and with as much colour of justice1 as any other contract2 and that ,i never pretended other affection than what ,i really had1 and have truly acquainted them with its birth1 vigour1 and declination1 its fits and intermissions3 a man does not always hold on at the same rate4 ,i have been so sparing of my promises1 that ,i think ,i have been better than my word4 ,they have found me faithful even to service of their inconstancy1 a confessed and sometimes multiplied inconstancy4 ,i never broke with them1 whilst ,i had any hold at all1 and what occasion soever they have given me1 never broke with them to hatred or contempt2 for such privacies1 though obtained upon never so scandalous terms1 do yet oblige to some good will3 ,i have sometimes1 upon their tricks and evasions1 discovered a little indiscreet anger and impatience2 for ,i am naturally subject to rash emotions1 which1 though light and short1 often spoil my market4 ,at any time they have consulted my judgment1 ,i never stuck to give them sharp and paternal counsels1 and to pinch them to the quick4 ,if ,i have left them any cause to complain of me1 'tis rather to have found in me1 in comparison of the modern use1 a love foolishly conscientious than anything else4 ,i have kept my1 word in things wherein ,i might easily have been dispensed2 they sometimes surrendered themselves with reputation1 and upon articles that they were willing enough should be broken by the conqueror3 ,i have1 more than once1 made pleasure in its greatest effort strike to the interest of their honour2 and where reason importuned me1 have armed them against myself2 so that they ordered themselves more decorously and securely by my rules1 when they frankly referred themselves to them1 than they would have done by their own4 ,i have ever1 as much as ,i could1 wholly taken upon myself alone the hazard of our assignations1 to acquit them2 and have always contrived our meetings after the hardest and most unusual manner1 as less suspected1 and1 moreover1 in my opinion1 more accessible4 ,they are chiefly more open1 where they think they are most securely shut2 things least feared are least interdicted and observed2 one may more boldly dare what nobody thinks you dare1 which by its difficulty becomes easy4 ,never had any man his approaches more impertinently generative2 this way of loving is more according to discipline but how ridiculous it is to our people1 and how ineffectual1 who better knows than ,i8 yet ,i shall not repent me of it2 ,i have nothing there more to lose3 ,me tabula sacer ,votiva paries1 indicat uvida ,suspendisse potenti ,vestimenta maris deo3 ,the holy wall1 by my votive table1 shows that ,i have hanged up my wet clothes in honour of the powerful god of the sea4 --,horace1 ,od41 i4 #e1 #ac4 'tis now time to speak out4 ,but as ,i might1 per adventure1 say to another1 ,thou talkest idly1 my friend2 the love of thy time has little commerce with faith and integrity2 ,haec si tu postules ,ratione certa facere1 nihilo plus agas1 ,quam si des operam1 ut cum ratione insanias3 ,if you seek to make these things certain by reason1 you will do no more than if you should seek to be mad in your senses4 --,terence1 ,eun41 act i41 sc4 i1 v4 #af4 on the contrary1 also1 if it were for me to begin again1 certainly it should be by the same method and the same progress1 how fruitless soever it might be to me2 folly and insufficiency are commendable in an incommendable action3 the farther ,i go from their humour in this1 ,i approach so much nearer to my own4 ,as to the rest1 in this traffic1 ,i did not suffer myself to be totally carried away2 ,i pleased myself in it1 but did not forget myself4 ,i retained the little sense and discretion that nature has given me1 entire for their service and my own3 a little emotion1 but no dotage4 ,my conscience1 also1 was engaged in it1 even to debauch and licentiousness2 but1 as to ingratitude1 treachery1 malice1 and cruelty1 never4 ,i would not purchase the pleasure of this vice at any price1 but content myself with its proper and simple cost3 ,nullum intra se vitium est4 ,nothing is a vice in itself4--,seneca1 ,ep41 #ie4 ,i almost equally hate a stupid and slothful laziness1 as ,i do a toilsome and painful employment2 this pinches1 the other lays me asleep4 ,i like wounds as well as bruises1 and cuts as well as dry blows4 ,i found in this commerce1 when ,i was the most able for it1 a just moderation betwixt these extremes4 ,love is a sprightly1 lively1 and gay agitation2 ,i was neither troubled nor afflicted with it1 but heated1 and moreover1 disordered2 a man must stop there2 it hurts nobody but fools4 ,a young man asked the philosopher ,panetius if it were becoming a wise man to be in love8 ,let the wise man look to that1 answered he1 but let not thou and ,i1 who are not so1 engage ourselves in so stirring and violent an affair1 that enslaves us to others1 and renders us contemptible to ourselves4 ,he said true that we are not to intrust a thing so precipitous in itself to a soul that has not wherewithal to withstand its assaults and disprove practically the saying of ,agesilaus1 that prudence and love cannot live together4 ',tis a vain employment1 'tis true1 unbecoming1 shameful1 and illegitimate2 but carried on after this manner1 ,i look upon it as wholesome1 and proper to enliven a drowsy soul and to rouse up a heavy body2 and1 as an experienced physician1 ,i would prescribe it to a man of my form and condition1 as soon as any other recipe whatever1 to rouse and keep him in vigour till well advanced in years1 and to defer the approaches of age4 ,whilst we are but in the suburbs1 and that the pulse yet beats3 ,dum nova canities1 dum prima et recta senectus1 ,dum superest lachesi quod torqueat1 et pedibus me ,porto meis1 nullo dextram subeunte bacillo1 ,whilst the white hair is new1 whilst old age is still straight shouldered1 whilst there still remains something for ,lachesis to spin1 whilst ,i walk on my own legs1 and need no staff to lean upon4 --,juvenal1 iii4 #bf4 we have need to be solicited and tickled by some such nipping incitation as this4 ,do but observe what youth1 vigour1 and gaiety it inspired the good ,anacreon withal3 and ,socrates1 who was then older than ,i1 speaking of an amorous object3 ,leaning1 said he1 my shoulder to her shoulder1 and my head to hers1 as we were reading together in a book1 ,i felt1 without dissembling1 a sudden sting in my shoulder like the biting of an insect1 which ,i still felt above five days after1 and a continual itching crept into my heart4 ,so that merely the accidental touch1 and of a shoulder1 heated and altered a soul cooled and enerved by age1 and the strictest liver of all mankind4 ,and1 pray1 why not8 ,socrates was a man1 and would neither be1 nor seem1 any other thing4 ,philosophy does not contend against natural pleasures1 provided they be moderate1 and only preaches moderation1 not a total abstinence2 the power of its resistance is employed against those that are adulterate and strange4 ,philosophy says that the appetites of the body ought not to be augmented by the mind1 and ingeniously warns us not to stir up hunger by saturity2 not to stuff1 instead of merely filling1 the belly2 to avoid all enjoyments that may bring us to want2 and all meats and drinks that bring thirst and hunger3 as1 in the service of love1 she prescribes us to take such an object as may simply satisfy the body's need1 and does not stir the soul1 which ought only barely to follow and assist the body1 without mixing in the affair4 ,but have ,i not reason to hold that these precepts1 which1 indeed1 in my opinion1 are somewhat over strict1 only concern a body in its best plight2 and that in a body broken with age1 as in a weak stomach1 'tis excusable to warm and support it by art1 and by the mediation of the fancy to restore the appetite and cheerfulness it has lost of itself4 ,may we not say that there is nothing in us1 during this earthly prison1 that is purely either corporeal or spiritual2 and that we injuriously break up a man alive2 and that it seems but reasonable that we should carry ourselves as favourably1 at least1 towards the use of pleasure as we do towards that of pain6 ,pain was 7for example7 vehement even to perfection in the souls of the saints by penitence3 the body had there naturally a sham by the right of union1 and yet might have but little part in the cause2 and yet are they not contented that it should barely follow and assist the afflicted soul3 they have afflicted itself with grievous and special torments1 to the end that by emulation of one another the soul and body might plunge man into misery by so much more salutiferous as it is more severe4 ,in like manner1 is it not injustice1 in bodily pleasures1 to subdue and keep under the soul1 and say that it must therein be dragged along as to some enforced and servile obligation and necessity8 ',tis rather her part to hatch and cherish them1 there to present herself1 and to invite them1 the authority of ruling belonging to her2 as it is also her part1 in my opinion1 in pleasures that are proper to her1 to inspire and infuse into the body all the sentiment it is capable of1 and to study how to make them sweet and useful to it4 ,for it is good reason1 as they say1 that the body should not pursue its appetites to the prejudice of the mind2 but why is it not also the reason that the mind should not pursue hers to the prejudice of the body8 ,i have no other passion to keep me in breath4 ,what avarice1 ambition1 quarrels1 lawsuits do for others who1 like me1 have no particular vocation1 love would much more commodiously do2 it would restore to me vigilance1 sobriety1 grace1 and the care of my person2 it would reassure my countenance1 so that the grimaces of old age1 those deformed and dismal looks1 might not come to disgrace it2 would again put me upon sound and wise studies1 by which ,i might render myself more loved and esteemed1 clearing my mind of the despair of itself and of its use1 and redintegrating it to itself2 would divert me from a thousand troublesome thoughts1 a thousand melancholic humours that idleness and the ill posture of our health loads us withal at such an age2 would warm again1 in dreams at least1 the blood that nature is abandoning2 would hold up the chin1 and a little stretch out the nerves1 the vigour and gaiety of life of that poor man who is going full drive towards his ruin4 ,but ,i very well understand that it is a commodity hard to recover3 by weakness and long experience our taste is become more delicate and nice2 we ask most when we bring least1 and are harder to choose when we least deserve to be accepted3 and knowing ourselves for what we are1 we are less confident and more distrustful2 nothing can assure us of being beloved1 considering our condition and theirs4 ,i am out of countenance to see myself in company with those young wanton creatures3 ,cujus in indomito constantior inguine nervus1 ,quam nova collibus arbor inhaeret4 ,in whose unbridled reins the vigour is more inherent than in the young tree on the hills4--,horace1 ,epod41 xii4 #ai4 ,to what end should we go insinuate our misery amid their gay and sprightly humour8 ,possint ut juvenes visere fervidi4 ,multo non sine risu1 ,dilapsam in cineres facem4 ,as the fervid youths may behold1 not without laughter1 a burning torch worn to ashes4--,horace1 ,od41 iv4 #ac1 #ba4 ,they have strength and reason on their side2 let us give way2 we have nothing to do there3 and these blossoms of springing beauty suffer not themselves to be handled by such benumbed hands nor dealt with by mere material means1 for1 as the old philosopher answered one who jeered him because he could not gain the favour of a young girl he made love to3 ,friend1 the hook will not stick in such soft cheese4 ,it is a commerce that requires relation and correspondence3 the other pleasures we receive may be acknowledged by recompenses of another nature1 but this is not to be paid but with the same kind of coin4 ,in earnest1 in this sport1 the pleasure ,i give more tickles my imagination than that they give me2 now1 he has nothing of generosity in him who can receive pleasure where he confers none--it must needs be a mean soul that will owe all1 and can be content to maintain relations with persons to whom he is a continual charge2 there is no beauty1 grace1 nor privacy so exquisite that a gentleman ought to desire at this rate4 ,if they can only be kind to us out of pity1 ,i had much rather die than live upon charity4 ,i would have right to ask1 in the style wherein ,i heard them beg in ,italy3 ,fate ben per voi1--,do good for yourself4--or after the manner that ,cyrus exhorted his soldiers1 ,who loves himself let him follow me4--,consort yourself1 some one will say to me1 with women of your own condition1 whom like fortune will render more easy to your desire4 ,o ridiculous and insipid composition6 ,nolo ,barbam vellere mortuo leoni4 ,i would not pluck the beard from a dead lion4--,martial ,xenophon lays it for an objection and an accusation against ,menon1 that he never made love to any but old women4 ,for my part1 ,i take more pleasure in but seeing the just and sweet mixture of two young beauties1 or only in meditating on it in my fancy1 than myself in acting second in a pitiful and imperfect conjunction2 ,which ,cotton renders1 ,than to be myself an actor in the second with a deformed creature4 ,i leave that fantastic appetite to the ,emperor ,galba1 who was only for old curried flesh3 and to this poor wretch3 ,o ego ,di faciant talem to cernere possim1 ,caraque mutatis oscula ferre comis1 ,amplectique meis corpus non pingue lacertis6 ,ovid1 who 7,ex4 ,ponto1 i4 #d1 #di7 writes to his wife1 ,o would the gods arrange that such ,i might see thee1 and bring dear kisses to thy changed locks1 and embrace thy withered body with my arms ,amongst chief deformities ,i reckon forced and artificial beauties3 ,hemon1 a young boy of ,chios1 thinking by fine dressing to acquire the beauty that nature had denied him1 came to the philosopher ,arcesilaus and asked him if it was possible for a wise man to be in love--,yes1 replied he1 provided it be not with a farded and adulterated beauty like thine4 ,diogenes ,laertius1 iv4 #cf4 ,the question was whether a wise man could love him4 ,cotton has ,emonez1 a young courtezan of ,chios4 ,ugliness of a confessed antiquity is to me less old and less ugly than another that is polished and plastered up4 ,shall ,i speak it1 without the danger of having my throat cut8 love1 in my opinion1 is not properly and naturally in its season1 but in the age next to childhood1 ,quem si puellarum insereres choro1 ,mille sagaces falleret hospites1 ,discrimen obscurum1 solutis ,crinibus ambiguoque vultu3 ,whom if thou shouldst place in a company of girls1 it would require a thousand experts to distinguish him1 with his loose locks and ambiguous countenance4--,horace1 ,od41 ii4 #e1 #ba4 nor beauty neither2 for whereas ,homer extends it so far as to the budding of the beard1 ,plato himself has remarked this as rare3 and the reason why the sophist ,bion so pleasantly called the first appearing hairs of adolescence ',aristogitons' and ',harmodiuses'--,plutarch1 ,on ,love1 c4#cd4-- is sufficiently known4 ,i find it in virility already in some sort a little out of date1 though not so much as in old age2 ,importunus enim transvolat aridas ,quercus4 ,for it uncivilly passes over withered oaks4 --,horace1 ,od41 iv4 #ac1 #i4 and ,marguerite1 ,queen of ,navarre1 like a woman1 very far extends the advantage of women1 ordaining that it is time1 at thirty years old1 to convert the title of fair into that of good4 ,the shorter authority we give to love over our lives1 'tis so much the better for us4 ,do but observe his port2 'tis a beardless boy4 ,who knows not how1 in his school they proceed contrary to all order2 study1 exercise1 and usage are their ways for insufficiency there novices rule3 ,amor ordinem nescit4 ,love ignores rules4 7,or37 ,love knows no rule4 --,st4 ,jerome1 ,letter to ,chyomatius4 ,doubtless his conduct is much more graceful when mixed with inadvertency and trouble2 miscarriages and ill successes give him point and grace2 provided it be sharp and eager1 'tis no great matter whether it be prudent or no3 do but observe how he goes reeling1 tripping1 and playing3 you put him in the stocks when you guide him by art and wisdom2 and he is restrained of his divine liberty when put into those hairy and callous clutches4 ,as to the rest1 ,i often hear the women set out this intelligence as entirely spiritual1 and disdain to put the interest the senses there have into consideration2 everything there serves2 but ,i can say that ,i have often seen that we have excused the weakness of their understandings in favour of their outward beauty1 but have never yet seen that in favour of mind1 how mature and full soever1 any of them would hold out a hand to a body that was never so little in decadence4 ,why does not some one of them take it into her head to make that noble ,socratical bargain between body and soul1 purchasing a philosophical and spiritual intelligence and generation at the price of her thighs1 which is the highest price she can get for them8 ,plato ordains in his ,laws that he who has performed any signal and advantageous exploit in war may not be refused during the whole expedition1 his age or ugliness notwithstanding1 a kiss or any other amorous favour from any woman whatever4 ,what he thinks to be so just in recommendation of military valour1 why may it not be the same in recommendation of any other good quality8 and why does not some woman take a fancy to possess over her companions the glory of this chaste love8 ,i may well say chaste2 ,nam si quando ad praelia ventum est1 ,ut quondam in stipulis magnus sine viribus ignis1 ,incassum furit3 ,for when they sometimes engage in love's battle1 his sterile ardour lights up but as the flame of a straw4 --,virgil1 ,georg41 iii4 #ih4 the vices that are stifled in the thought are not the worst4 ,to conclude this notable commentary1 which has escaped from me in a torrent of babble1 a torrent sometimes impetuous and hurtful1 ,ut missum sponsi furtivo munere malum ,procurrit casto virginis a gremio1 ,quod miserae oblitae molli sub veste locatuat1 ,dum adventu matris prosilit1 excutitur1 ,atque illud prono praeceps agitur decursu ,huic manat tristi conscius ore rubor4 ,as when an apple1 sent by a lover secretly to his mistress1 falls from the chaste virgin's bosom1 where she had quite forgotten it2 when1 starting at her mother's coming in1 it is shaken out and rolls over the floor before her eyes1 a conscious blush covers her face4 --,catullus1 lxv4 #ai4 ,i say that males and females are cast in the same mould1 and that1 education and usage excepted1 the difference is not great4 ,plato indifferently invites both the one and the other to the society of all studies1 exercises1 and vocations1 both military and civil1 in his ,commonwealth2 and the philosopher ,antisthenes rejected all distinction betwixt their virtue and ours4 ,it is much more easy to accuse one sex than to excuse the other2 'tis according to the saying1 ,le fourgon se moque de la paele4 ,the ,pot and the ,kettle4 ,,etext ,,editor',s ,,bookmarks3 ,a gallant man does not give over his pursuit for being refused ,a lady could not boast of her chastity who was never tempted ,appetite is more sharp than one already half-glutted by the eyes ,bashfulness is an ornament to youth1 but a reproach to old age ,certain other things that people hide only to show them ,chiefly knew himself to be mortal by this act ,dearness is a good sauce to meat ,each amongst you has made somebody cuckold ,eat your bread with the sauce of a more pleasing imagination ,evade this tormenting and unprofitable knowledge ,feminine polity has a mysterious procedure ,few men have made a wife of a mistress1 who have not repented it ,first thing to be considered in love matters3 a fitting time ,friend1 the hook will not stick in such soft cheese4 ,give the ladies a cruel contempt of our natural furniture ,guess at our meaning under general and doubtful terms ,hate all sorts of obligation and restraint ,have ever had a great respect for her ,i loved ,have no other title left me to these things but by the ears ,heat and stir up their imagination1 and then we find fault ,husbands hate their wives only because they themselves do wrong ,i am apt to dream that ,i dream ,i do not say that 'tis well said1 but well thought ,i had much rather die than live upon charity4 ,i was always superstitiously afraid of giving offence ,if ,i am talking my best1 whoever interrupts me1 stops me ,if they can only be kind to us out of pity ,in everything else a man may keep some decorum ,in those days1 the tailor took measure of it ,inclination to variety and novelty common to us both ,inconsiderate excuses are a kind of self-accusation ,interdiction incites1 and who are more eager1 being forbidden ,it happens1 as with cages1 the birds without despair to get in ,jealousy3 no remedy but flight or patience ,judgment of duty principally lies in the will ,ladies are no sooner ours1 than we are no more theirs ,let a man take which course he will1 said he2 he will repent4 ,let us not be ashamed to speak what we are not ashamed to think ,love is the appetite of generation by the mediation of beauty ,love shamefully and dishonestly cured by marriage ,love them the less for our own faults ,love1 full1 lively1 and sharp2 a pleasure inflamed by difficulty ,man must approach his wife with prudence and temperance ,marriage rejects the company and conditions of love ,men make them 7the rules7 without their 7women's7 help ,misfortunes that only hurt us by being known ,modesty is a foolish virtue in an indigent person 7,homer7 ,most of my actions are guided by example1 not by choice ,neither continency nor virtue where there are no opposing desire ,no doing more difficult than that not doing1 nor more active ,o wretched men1 whose pleasures are a crime ,o1 the furious advantage of opportunity6 ,observed the laws of marriage1 than ,i either promised or expect ,one may more boldly dare what nobody thinks you dare ,order it so that your virtue may conquer your misfortune ,plato says1 that the gods made man for their sport ,pleasure of telling 7a pleasure little inferior to that of doing7 ,priest shall on the wedding-day open the way to the bride ,prudent man1 when ,i imagine him in this posture ,rage compelled to excuse itself by a pretence of good-will ,rather be a less while old than be old before ,i am really so ,represented her a little too passionate for a married ,venus ,revenge more wounds our children than it heals us ,sex3 ,to put fools and wise men1 beasts and us1 on a level ,sharps and sweets of marriage1 are kept secret by the wise ,sins that make the least noise are the worst ,sleep suffocates and suppresses the faculties of the soul ,sufficiently covered by their virtue without any other robe ,the best authors too much humble and discourage me ,the impulse of nature1 which is a rough counsellor ,the privilege of the mind to rescue itself from old age ,their disguises and figures only serve to cosen fools ,there is no allurement like modesty1 if it be not rude ,these sleepy1 sluggish sort of men are often the most dangerous ,they better conquer us by flying ,they buy a cat in a sack ,they err as much who too much forbear ,venus ,they must become insensible and invisible to satisfy us ,they who would fight custom with grammar are triflers ,those which we fear the least are1 peradventure1 most to be fear ,those within 7marriage7 despair of getting out ,tis all swine's flesh1 varied by sauces ,to what friend dare you intrust your griefs ,twas a happy marriage betwixt a blind wife and a deaf husband ,unjust judges of their actions1 as they are of ours ,very idea we invent for their chastity is ridiculous ,virtue is a pleasant and gay quality ,we ask most when we bring least ,we say a good marriage because no one says to the contrary4 ,when jealousy seizes these poor souls ,when their eyes give the lie to their tongue ,who escapes being talked of at the same rate ,wisdom has its excesses1 and has no less need of moderation ,would in this affair have a man a little play the servant