,,the ,,romance ,,of ,,the ,,soul ,by ,lilian ,staveley ,the ,author of ,the ,golden ,fountain ,london ,john ,m4 ,watkins #ba ,cecil ,court1 ,charing ,cross ,road1 ,w4,c4 #b #aibj ,what am ,i8 ,in my flesh ,i am but equal to the beasts of the field4 ,in my heart and mind ,i am corrupt ,humanity4 ,in my soul ,i know not what ,i am or may be1 and therein lies my hope4 ,o wonderful and mysterious soul1 more fragile than gossamer and yet so strong that she may stand in the ,presence of ,god and not perish6 ,though ye have lien among the pots1 yet shall ye be as the wings of a dove4--,psalm lxviii4 #ac4 ,by what means shall the ordinary man and woman1 living the usual everyday life1 whether of work or of leisure1 find ,god8 ,and this without withdrawing themselves into a life apart--a religious life1 and without outward and conspicuous piety always running to public worship 7though often very cross and impatient at home72 without leaving undone any of the duties necessary to the welfare of those dependent on them2 without making themselves in any way peculiar2--how shall these same people go up into the secret places of ,god1 how shall they find the marvellous peace of ,god1 how satisfy those vague persistent longings for a happiness more complete than any they have so far known1 yet a happiness which is whispered of between the heart and the soul as something which is to be possessed if we but knew how to get it8 ,how shall ordinary mortals whilst still in the flesh re-enter ,eden even for an hour8 for ,eden is not dead and gone1 but we are dead to ,eden--,eden1 the secret garden of enchantment where the soul and the mind and the heart live in the presence of ,god and hear once more the voice of ,god walking in the garden in the cool of the day 7,gen4 iii474 ,it is possible for these things to come to us or we to them1 and in quite a few years if we set our hearts on them4 ,first we must desire2 and after the desire1 steady and persistent1 ,god will give4 ,and we say1 ,but ,i have desired and ,i do desire1 and ,god does not give4 ,why is this8 ,there are two reasons for it4 ,for one--are these marvellous things to be given because of one cry2 for one petulant demand2 for a few tears1 mostly of self-pity1 shed in an hour when the world fails to satisfy us1 when a friend has disappointed us1 when our plans are spoiled1 when we are sick or lonely8 ,these are the occasions on which we mostly find time to think of what we call a better world1 and of the consolations of ,god4 ,but let anyone have all that he can fancy1 be carried high upon the flood-tide of prosperity1 ambition1 and success1 and how much time will he or she give to ,almighty ,god8--not two moments during the day4 ,yet the ,maker of all things is to bestow ,his unspeakable riches upon us in return for two moments of our thought or love6 ,does a man acquire great worldly wealth1 or fame1 in return for two moments of endeavour8 ,ah1 some of us may cry1 but it is more than two moments that ,i give ,him2 ,i give ,him hours1 and yet ,i cannot find ,him4 ,if that is really so1 then the second reason is the one which would explain why ,he has not been found4 ,a great wall divides us from the consciousness of the ,presence of ,god4 ,in this wall there is one ,door1 and one only1 ,jesus ,christ4 ,we have not found ,god because we have not found ,him first as ,jesus ,christ in our own heart4 ,now whether we take our heart to church1 whether we take it to our daily work1 or whether we take it to our amusements1 we shall not find ,jesus in any one place more than another if ,he is not already in our hearts to begin with4 ,how shall ,i commence to love a ,being whom ,i have never seen8 ,by thinking about ,him2 by thinking about ,him very persistently2 by comparing the world and its friendships and its loves and its deceits and its secret enviousnesses with all that we know of the lovely ways of gentle ,jesus4 ,if we do this consistently1 it is impossible not to find ,him more lovable than any other person that we know4 ,the more lovable we find ,him the more we think about ,him1 by so much the more we find ourselves beginning to love ,him1 and once we have learnt to hold ,him very warmly and tenderly in our heart1 then we are well in the way to find the ,christ and afterwards that divine garden of the soul in which ,god seems to slip ,his hand under our restless anxious heart and lift it high into a place of safety and repose4 ,when for some time we have learnt to go in and out of this garden1 with ,god's tender help we make ourself a dear place--a nest under ,god's wing1 and yet mysteriously even nearer than this1 it is so near to ,god4 ,to this place we learn to fly to and fro in a second of time3 so that1 sitting weary and harassed in the counting-house1 in an instant a man can be away in his soul's nest2 and so very great is the refreshment of it and the strength of it that he comes back to his work a new man1 and so silently and quickly done that no one else in the room would ever know he had been there3 it is a secret between his ,lord and himself4 ,but the person who learns to do this does not remain the same raw uncivilised creature that once he or she was3 but slowly must become quite changed2 all tastes must alter1 7all capacities will increase in an extraordinary manner71 and all thoughts of heart and mind must become acceptable and pleasant to ,god4 ,the man who has not yet begun to seek ,god--that is to say1 has not even commenced to try and learn how to live spiritually1 but lives absorbed entirely in the things of the flesh--is a spiritual savage4 ,to watch such a man and his ways and his tastes is to the spiritual man the same thing as when a ,european watches an ,african in his native haunts1 notes his beads1 his frightful tastes in decorations1 foods1 amusements1 habits1 and habitations1 and1 comparing them with his own ways1 says instantly that man is a savage4 ,this proud ,european does not pause to consider that he himself may be inwardly what the savage is--quite dark2 that to ,god's eyes his own ways and tastes are as frightful as those of the ,african are to himself4 ,what raises a man above a savage is not the size of his dining-room1 the cut of his coat1 the luxuries of his house1 the learned books that adorn his bookshelves1 but that he should have begun to learn how to live spiritually3 this is the only true civilising of the human animal4 ,until it is commenced1 his manners and his ways are nothing but a veneer covering the raw instincts of the natural man--instincts satisfied more carefully1 more hiddenly1 than those of the ,african1 but always the same4 ,there is little variety in the lusts of the flesh2 they are all after one pattern1 each of its kind1 follow one another in a circle1 and are very limited4 ,it is not the clay of our bodies fashioned by ,god which makes some common and some not4 ,it is the independent and un-,godlike thoughts of our hearts and minds which can make of us common1 and even savage1 persons4 ,the changing of these thoughts1 the harmonising of them1 and1 finally1 the total alteration of them1 is the work in us of the ,holy ,spirit4 ,by taking ,christ into our hearts and making for ,him there a living nest1 we set that mighty force in motion which shall eventually make for us a nest in the ,living ,god4 ,for ,jesus ,christ is able 7but only with our own entire willingness7 to make us not only acceptable to ,god1 but delightful to ,him1 so much so that even while we remain in the flesh ,he would seem not to be willing to endure having us always away from ,him1 but visits us and dwells with us after ,his own marvellous fashion and catches us up to ,himself4 ,to begin with1 we must have a set purpose and will towards ,god4 ,in the whole spiritual advance it is first we who must make the effort1 which ,god will then stabilise1 and finally on our continuing to maintain this effort ,he will bring it to complete fruition4 ,thus step by step the spirit rises--first the effort1 then the gift4 ,first the will to do--and then the grace to do it with4 ,without the willing will ,god gives no grace3 without ,god's grace no will of ,man can reach attainment4 ,god's will and ,man's will1 ,god's love and ,man's love--these working and joining harmoniously together raise ,man up into ,eternal ,life4 99 99 99 ,god is desirous of communicating ,himself to us in a ,personal manner4 ,in the ,scriptures we have the foundation1 the basis1 the cause and reason of our ,faith laid out before us2 but ,he wills that we go beyond this basis1 this reasoning of ,faith into experience of ,himself4 ,for this end1 then1 ,he fills us with the aching desire to find and know ,him1 to be filled with ,him1 to be comforted and consoled by ,him1 to discover ,his joys4 ,he fills us with these desires in order that ,he may gratify us4 ,by being willing to receive and understand as only through the medium of the written word we limit ,god in ,his communications with us4 ,for by the ,holy ,ghost ,he will communicate not by written word but by personal touching of love brought about for us by the taking and enclosing of ,jesus ,christ within the heart not only as the ,written ,word1 the ,promise and ,hope of ,scripture1 but as the ,living ,god4 ,for this end inward meditation and pondering are a necessity4 99 99 99 ,how is it that we so often find great virtue1 remarkable charity and patience amongst persons who are yet not conscious of any direct contact with ,god8 ,they have never known the pains of repentance1 neither have they known the sublime joys of ,god4 ,are these the ninety-and-nine just persons needing no repentance8 ,instinctively1 and almost unconsciously1 they hold to1 and draw upon1 the ,universal ,christ--or ,spirit of ,righteousness2 but they have not laid hold of nor taken into themselves that ,spirit of the ,personal ,christ1 whom ,christians receive and know through ,jesus4 ,he is the ,door into the unspeakable joys of ,god4 ,what are these joys of ,god8 ,they are varying degrees of the manifestation and experience of reciprocal ,divine ,love4 ,what is the true aim of spiritual endeavour--an attempt at personal and individual salvation8 ,yes1 to commence with1 but beyond that1 and more fully1 it is the attempt to comply with the exquisite ,will of ,god2 and the general and universal improving and raising of the consciousness of the whole world4 ,yet this universal improvement must take place in each individual spirit in an individual manner4 ,there are those who would deny to individuality its rights1 claiming that the highest spirituality is the total cessation of all individuality2 yet this would not appear to be ,god's view of the matter1 for in the most supreme contacts of the soul with ,himself ,he does not wipe out the consciousness of the soul's individual joy1 but1 on the contrary1 to an untenable extent ,he increases it4 ,and ,jesus teaches us that life here is both the means and the process of the gradual conformation of the will of ,man to the will of ,god1 and our true work is the individual learning of this process4 ,but this cultivation of our individuality must not be subverted to the purpose of the mere gain of personal advantage1 but because of the heartfelt wish to conform to the glorious will of ,god4 ,the failure of the human will to run in conjunction with the ,divine will is the cause1 as we know1 of all sin4 ,in the friction of these opposing wills1 forces baneful to ,man are generated4 ,from its very earliest commencement in childhood our system of education is based upon wrong ideas4 ,with little or no regard to ,god's plans ,man lays out his own puny laws and ambitions and teaches them to his young4 ,we are not taught that what we are here for is above all and before all to arrive at a sense of personal connection with ,god1 to identify ourselves with the spiritual while still in the flesh4 ,on the contrary1 we are taught to grow shy1 even ashamed1 of the spiritual6 and to regard the world as a place principally or even solely in which to enjoy ourselves or make a successful career4 ,children are taught to look eagerly and mainly for holidays and parties2 grown men and women the same upon a larger and more foolish scale1 and always under the terribly mistaken belief that in spiritual things no great happiness is to be found1 but only in materialism3 yet very often we find the greatest unhappiness amongst the wealthiest people4 ,happiness6 happiness6 ,we see the great pursuit of it on every side1 and no truer or more needful instinct has been given to ,man1 but he fails to use it in the way intended4 ,this world is a ,touchstone1 a ,finding-place for ,god4 ,whoever will obey the law of finding ,god from this world instead of waiting to try and do it from the next1 he1 and he only1 will ever grasp and take into himself that fugitive mysterious unseen ,something which--not knowing what it is1 yet feeling that it exists--we have named ,happiness4 ,but how commence this formidable1 this seemingly impossible task of finding ,god in a world in which ,he is totally invisible8 ,to the natural or animal ,man ,god is as totally hidden and inaccessible as ,he is to the beasts of the field2 yet encased within his bosom lies the soul which can be the means of drawing ,man and ,god together in a glorious union4 ,i have known all this from my childhood1 we cry1 and the knowledge of it has not helped me one step upon my way4 ,then try again1 and reverse your method1 for hitherto you have been beseeching gifts from ,god1 asking for gifts from ,jesus1 and have forgotten to give4 ,give your love to ,jesus1 give ,him a home1 instead of asking ,him to give you one4 ,give your heart to ,god1 set it upon ,him4 ,what is keeping you back8 ,you are afraid of what it will entail2 you are afraid of what ,god will demand of you2 those words ,forsake all1 and follow ,me fill you with something like terror4 ,i cannot leave my business1 my children1 my home1 my luxuries1 my games1 my dresses1 my friends6 ,neither need you but1 knowing this initial agony of mind1 ,christ said it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle 7the name of an exceedingly narrow gate into ,jerusalem7 than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven4 ,what does it mean to set the heart upon something8 ,we say1 ,i have set my heart on going to see my son1 ,i have set my heart on doing so-and-so1 but this does not mean that in order to accomplish it we must wander homeless and lonely until the day of achievement4 ,no2 but we set our heart and mind upon eventually accomplishing this wish1 we shape all our plans towards it1 we give it the first place4 ,this is what ,god asks us to do2 to give ,him the first place4 ,we need not go to ,him in rags3 ,david and ,solomon were immensely wealthy1 ,job was a rich man2 but we must eventually think more of ,him than we do of our dress1 more of ,him than we do of our business1 more of ,him than we do of lover1 friend1 or child4 ,many well-minded people are under the impression that such love for an ,invisible ,being is a total impossibility4 ,yet the great commandment stands written all across the face of the heavens--,thou shalt love ,me with all thy heart and mind and soul and strength4 ,are we then to suppose that ,god asks the impossible of ,his own creatures1 that ,he mocks us8 ,no2 for when we desire ,he sends the capacity1 and day by day sends us the power to reach this love through ,jesus ,christ4 ,there is included in the words ,give us this day our daily bread1 the bread of the soul1 which is ,love4 ,divine ,love commences in us in a very small way1 as a very feeble flicker1 for we are very feeble and small creatures4 ,but ,god takes the will for the deed1 and the day comes when suddenly we are filled with true love1 as a gift4 ,this is indeed the second baptism1 the baptism of fire1 the baptism of the ,holy ,ghost2 then at last the great wall which has hitherto divided our consciousness from ,god goes down in its entirety1 never again to rise up and divide us4 ,this is the mighty work of ,jesus ,christ4 ,though this is not our work1 still we have had the earnest will1 the longing desire2 we have made continually1 perseveringly1 our tiny1 often futile1 efforts to please and place ,him first1 and though perhaps almost all were failures1 ,he has counted every one to us for righteousness4 ,we may at all times be asking ourselves1 ,but how shall ,i know the will of ,god1 how shall ,i please ,him1 how shall ,i know what ,christ would wish me to do or to think8 ,there is one test more sure than any other1 which is to ask oneself1 ,would ,jesus have done just this8 and the answer will come from the inward of us instantaneously4 ,but before we can use this test we must have made a careful study of ,scripture and also have begun the habit of inward personal intimacy with ,jesus ,himself4 ,so immense is the bounty of ,god to the creature that truly and persistently wills and endeavours to please ,him1 so great are the rewards of that creature for its tiny work that it is as though a child should scratch bare ground with its little spade and reap a harvest of sweet flowers as magic gifts4 ,in this way it is that we find actually fulfilled in ourselves the lovely words of the prophet1 the desert shall blossom like the rose4 ,the great initial difficulty that surely most of us feel is how to come into personal contact with this ,jesus ,christ1 and to know which are the first steps that we should take to bring about this contact4 ,they are just those same steps that we use to come to a nearer understanding of and greater intimacy with any persons we are desirous of making friends with4 ,we commence by thinking about them1 by arranging to spend time in their companionship2 and the more we think about them and the more time we spend with them if they are very attractive people1 the more we feel in sympathy with them4 ,form1 then1 the habit of making for brief instants a mental picture of the ,saviour4 ,note the exquisite tenderness of ,his hands1 so instantly ready to save and heal2 note the calm strength and the great love in ,his countenance1 walk beside ,him down the street1 join ,his daily life1 learn to become familiar with ,him as ,jesus--what would ,he do1 how would ,he look1 what would ,his thoughts be8 ,to feel sympathetically towards a person is to take one of the most important steps towards friendship4 ,how many of us stop in the rush of our daily amusements1 interests1 and work to sympathise with ,christ8 ,most probably1 if we think of ,christ at all1 it is to feel that ,he ought to sympathise with us6 ,now ,christ not only sympathises with but ardently loves us1 and our failure to receive the comfort and help of this love is due to our failure in returning to ,him these same feelings of sympathy and love and friendship4 ,we are not reciprocal1 but perpetually ask and never give4 ,it is only by returning love to ,christ that we are able to receive the benefits of ,his love for us4 ,his mighty power and help flows around but not through us until we place ourselves in individual and direct contact with ,him1 until we make that mysterious inward and spiritual connection with ,him which can be achieved only through a personal love for ,him4 ,again and again we may cry out1 ,but how love the invisible8 ,christ is invisible1 but for all that1 he is not unknown4 ,we all of us know ,him4 ,but we do not give ourselves time or opportunity to know ,him sufficiently well4 ,what hours1 months1 years1 we devote to making and knowing our friends2 yet a few moments a day are more than enough for most of us to spend in becoming more intimate with the only ,friend whom it is worth our while to make4 ,but life is so busy ,i have no time1 you say4 ,what of those hours spent in the train1 those moments spent waiting for an appointment1 that half-hour taken for a rest1 but which is not a rest because of the rushing inharmonious turmoil of your thoughts8 ,no one is so restful to think of as ,jesus4 ,every single quality that we most admire1 trust1 and love is to be found in ,jesus ,christ4 ,the only reason of our failure to love ,him more ardently than any human being we know is that we do not think enough about ,him4 ,how much offended we should be if anyone dared to say to us1 ,you are not a ,christian4 ,we all consider ourselves ,christians as a matter of course2 but why this certainty1 what reason can we give8 ,many would say1 ,i keep the ,commandments1 and ,i am baptised in ,christ's name4 ,but ,christianity is not an act done by hands1 it is a life1 and the ,jews keep the ,commandments even more strictly than we and are not ,christians4 ,the mere fact of believing that ,christ once lived and was crucified is not enough4 ,the ,jews and also the ,mahommedans believe that ,he lived and was crucified4 ,what is then necessary8 ,that we believe that ,he is indeed the ,son of ,god1 the ,messiah1 the ,saviour2 for if ,he was no more than a holy man1 by what means has ,he power to save us more than ,moses has power to save us8 ,the true inward knowledge that ,christ is ,god comes not by nature to any man1 but by gift of ,god--which gift must be earnestly sought1 striven1 prayed for1 and desired3 this faith is the very coming to ,god by which we are saved4 ,if we are not yet in this faith that ,jesus ,christ is the ,messiah1 then we are neither ,jew1 ,mahommedan1 nor ,christian1 but wanderers without a fold1 and without a ,shepherd2 longing1 and not yet comforted4 ,how do we come by this joy of the personal loving of ,god1 this ,romance of the ,soul brought to sensible fruition whilst still in the flesh8 ,is it a gift8 ,yes4 ,is it a gift because of some merit of goodness on our part beyond the goodness of other persons who are without it1 though striving8 ,no4 ,is it because of some work for ,god that we do in this world1 charitable or social8 ,no4 ,is it1 then1 nothing but an arbitrary favouritism on ,his part8 ,no4 ,is it a sagacity or cleverness1 a height of learning1 a result of close study8 ,no4 ,it is simply and solely a certain and particular obedient attitude of heart and mind towards ,god of the nature of a longing--giving1 a grateful outgoing thinking towards ,him1 continually maintained1 and a heart invitation to1 and a receiving of ,jesus ,christ into ourselves4 ,our part is to maintain this obedient tender-waiting1 giving and receiving attitude under all the circumstances of daily life1 and ,christ with the ,holy ,ghost will then work the miracle in us4 ,but so difficult is this attitude to maintain that we are totally unable to do it without another gift upon ,his part--,grace4 ,the whole process from first to last is gift upon gift1 and that because first of our belief and desire1 and then of our continually remembering that to receive these gifts we have a part to play which ,god will not dispense with4 ,for an illustration let us turn to the artist and his sitter4 ,the sitter does not produce the work of art1 but must maintain his attitude3 if he refuses to do this1 the work of the artist is marred and even altogether foiled4 ,so with ,christ and ,his ,divine ,art in bringing us to our ,father--by not endeavouring to maintain our right attitude we foil ,his work4 ,god would seem to give us that which we seek and ask for1 and no more4 ,great ecclesiastics1 theologians1 philosophers who sought and desired ,him with the intelligence1 seeking for knowledge1 for pre-eminence of spiritual wisdom1 were not given as an addition to their learning this exquisite fire and balm of love4 ,those who desired of ,christ the healing of the body received that1 and we are not told they received anything further4 ,so also with the woman at the well3 ,if thou hadst asked1 ,christ said to her1 ,i would have given thee of the water of ,life4 ,without we ask for and receive this gift of ,love we hang to ,god by ,faith only4 ,what is true religion1 what is that religion by which we shall feel wholly satisfied8 ,it is to have ,christ recognised1 known1 adored1 and living in the soul4 ,this is the ,new ,life within us1 this is the ,new ,birth4 ,the first proofs of the power of this ,new ,life in us is the victory over all the lower passions1 victory over the animal that once was ourself6 ,a victory so complete that not only do we cease to desire those former things or be troubled by them but we no longer respond to that which is base1 even though we be brought into visual contact with such things as would formerly have inevitably excited at least a passing response in us4 ,can any man free himself in such a manner from his own nature8 ,common sense forbids us imagine it4 ,it is then a ,living ,power within us1 slowly transforming us to higher levels1 from the fleshly to the spiritual1 and shaping us to meet the purity of ,god4 ,and such is the tender consideration of this ,power for our weakness that while we are learning to give up these baser pleasures ,he teaches us the higher pleasures of the soul--we are not left comfortless4 ,so in our earlier stages we may have many very wonderful ecstasies which later are altogether dispensed with1 and indeed are eventually not desired by the soul1 or even the more greedy heart and mind1 which all now ask and desire one favour only--to be on earth in continual fellowship with ,christ ,jesus and ever able to enter into the love of ,god4 ,to be without this glorious power of entering ,responsive ,love of ,god1 to be cut off from this1 is the great and only fear of the soul4 ,this fear it is which holds the soul and the creature towards ,god both day and night lest by the least forgetfulness or wrongful attitude they should lose ,him or displease ,him4 ,all these changes no man can bring about for himself--they are accomplished for him by the ,holy ,spirit2 but this he can and must do for himself1 invite ,sweet ,jesus into his heart and enthrone ,him there as ,ruler4 ,this once accomplished1 that mysterious monitor within us commonly known as ,conscience grows until it attains an excessive sensitiveness which penetrates the minutest acts of life and the deepest recesses of heart and mind4 ,it becomes inexorable1 it demands instant and complete obedience4 ,because of it relations with other persons undergo a drastic change4 ,complete1 instant1 entire forgiveness for every offence is demanded1 and at last even a momentary annoyance must be effaced2 no matter how great the cause of annoyance1 it must be effaced in the same instant as that in which it crosses the mind1 for a single adverse thought eventually proves as injurious to the ,spirit as a grain of sand is to the eyes4 ,the petty human aims1 the smallness of all our former standards1 the instinct for retaliation must all be overcome1 laid upon one side--a slow task of much humiliation to the creature1 revealing to it its own smallness and vanity and its own extraordinary ineffectiveness of self-control1 its puny powers over itself3 nothing short of an absolute self-conquest is aimed at and demanded by this inward monitor--the ,soul4 ,with what profound veneration for and recognition of the power of ,god does the regenerated creature think of those alterations in its own nature which1 after long strivings1 are eventually given it by ,god1 and of those alterations not yet stabilised because not yet gifts1 but only on the way to perhaps becoming gifts--that is to say1 still only where the power of the creature itself has been able to raise them3 for of these last it may invariably be said that to-day we may feel serene security and to-morrow fall and fail--and this in the very meanest way6 ,we see on every side men and women who try to fill an emptiness1 a wanting that they feel within themselves1 by every sort of means except the only one which can ever be a permanent success4 ,women devote themselves to lovers1 husbands1 children1 dress1 society1 and dogs2 men to business1 ambition1 the racecourse1 folly1 drink1 games1 and arts4 ,are any of these persons truly happy1 truly satisfied in all their being8 ,no1 and they descend to old age surrounded by the dust of disillusionment4 ,lonely and soon forgotten by the hungry pleasure-seeking crowd1 such persons pass from this world1 and the most their friends have to say is that they have gone to a better one4 ,but have they8 ,for the mere fact of shedding the flesh does not bring us any nearer to ,god4 ,on the contrary1 the shedding of the flesh increases appallingly the difficulty of the soul in finding ,god4 ,this world is the very place in which we can most easily and quickly get into communication with ,god4 ,to think that the mere act of dying improves our character and takes us to heaven is a delusion of the ,enemy--it is living here which can fit us and carry us to heaven2 and we have no great distance to travel either1 for heaven is a state of consciousness1 and by entering that state of consciousness we become united and connected with such degrees of heaven as the flesh is able to bear1 though these degrees fall infinitely short of those required by the soul3 hence the fearful hungering and longing of the soul to depart from the flesh4 ,if we do not find ,christ whilst we are here1 when we cast off the flesh we enter a bewildering vortex of a life of terrible intensity and great solitude4 ,we are aware of nothing but ,self1 are tormented by ,self with its forever unsatisfied longings1 and by the impossibility of achieving any other ,self4 ,in this intensity of self-tormenting loneliness the soul feels to gyrate1 and all that she knows of that which is outside of this ,self is the sound of the rushing of invisible things1 for she is blind4 ,without the light of this world and without the light of ,christ4 ,the joys of space are not open to her1 only the dark and lonely horrors of it3 she is in an incalculably greater state of isolation from ,god than here in this world6 ,the remedy for all this lies here2 let no one think he can afford to wait to find this remedy until after he leaves this world1 for then his chance is gone1 and who is able to foretell when it will return8 ,what can be more beautiful1 more happy1 than to find this remedy1 to find the only ,being who loves us as much as we love ourselves6 the gentle1 tender1 gracious1 all-sufficing ,christ2 that all-mighty ever-giving ,christ who yearns over and longs for us--what madness is it that prevents us seeking ,him8 ,all of us would seem to have two personalities3 we are the repentant and the unrepentant ,magdalene and daily change from one to the other4 ,but true repentance cannot come before love3 if we think we repent before we love1 then it is no more than a repentance of the mind1 which says to itself1 ,i must stand well with ,god because of my future well-being4 ,where love comes first we get the repentance of the heart1 which works this way in us--we love ,jesus a little1 we love ,him more and more1 and because of this love increasing to real warmth we suddenly perceive the frightful offences we have committed against this sweet love1 and instantly the heart melts and breaks and we are shaken to our depths that we have ever grieved our ,holy ,lover4 ,this is true repentance--no anxious fears for our own future1 but love grieving and agonised for its offences4 ,such repentance as this pierces to the deepest recesses of the heart and mind1 and leaves upon them a deep indelible mark1 changing all the aims of our life1 and is the beginning of all joys in ,christ ,jesus4 ,let us aim therefore not first at repentance1 but first at love4 ,a little love to ,jesus given many times a day as we walk or wait or work1 if only at first said by the lips with desire for more warmth1 after a while we shall find ourselves giving it from the heart2 then the ,divine ,seed has begun to grow because we have watered it4 ,if the natural man were asked1 ,what is life8 what is it to live8 he would reply1 ,it is to eat1 drink1 laugh1 love1 and have pleasure or pain3 to hear1 see1 touch1 taste and smell1 and to be conscious that ,i do all these things4 ,yet this consciousness is but a tiny speck of consciousness1 and some mysterious voice within the deeply-thinking man tells him that this is so4 ,but how uncover a further consciousness8 ,this is the secret of the soul4 ,to pass from one form of consciousness to another--this is to increase life fifty1 a hundred1 a thousand times according to the degrees of consciousness we can attain4 ,these degrees would seem to be irrevocably limited because of the mechanical actions of heart and breathing1 which automatic actions become suspended or seriously interfered with in very high states of consciousness4 ,when first these very great expansions of consciousness take place1 the creature is under strong conviction that the soul has left the body--that it has gone upon some mysterious journey--this because of several reasons4 ,the first is because of a certain persistent sound of rushing2 the second is because of the sense of living at tremendous speed1 in a manner previously altogether unknown and totally undreamed of1 in which the senses of the body have no concern whatever and are completely closed down2 thirdly1 on returning from this journey we are not immediately able to exact obedience from the body1 which remains inert and stiffly cold and suffers distress with too slow breathing4 ,but reason demands1 ,how is it possible that the soul should leave the body and the body not die8 and also we perceive this1 that1 though the consciousness is projected to an infinite distance1 or includes that infinite distance within itself1 it yet remains aware of the existence of the body1 though very dimly4 ,the method employed1 then1 for administering these experiences to the soul and the creature is not by means of drawing the soul out of the body1 but by a withdrawal of the condition of insulation from ,divine ,life or great magnetic emanation1 in which insulation all creatures have their normal existence1 living in a condition which may be termed a state of total ,unawareness4 ,by ,will of ,god this condition of insulation is removed1 the soul enters ,connection and becomes instantly and vividly aware of ,spiritual ,life and of that which ,is1 at an infinite distance from herself1 so that the soul is at one and the same time in paradise or heaven1 and upon the earth3 space is eaten up4 ,without seeing or hearing1 the soul partakes in a tremendous and unspeakable manner of the joys of ,god1 which1 all unfelt by us as natural man1 pass unceasingly throughout the universe4 ,these experiences give an immense and unshakable knowledge to the soul and the creature of the immense reality of the ,unseen ,life1 and are doubtless sent us to effect this knowledge4 ,why1 then1 is not every man given this knowledge8 ,because the creature must qualify before being allowed to receive it1 and too many hold back from the tests4 ,by these experiences we learn some little portion of the mystery which lies between the pettiness of that which we now are and the great glories that we shall come to2 and in this awful heavenly mystery in which are fires that have no flame1 and melody which has no sound1 the soul is drawn to ,everlasting ,love4 ,but we cannot endure the bliss of it1 and the soul prays to be covered on account of the creature4 ,but because of the limitations of the flesh we are not to despise it but regard it not as an aim or end 7as that if we satisfy its lusts that shall be our paradise71 but regard it as a means4 ,christ willed the flesh and the world to be a rapid means of our return to ,god4 ,subdue the flesh without despising it1 in humility and thankfulness4 ,suffer its trials and penalties not in dejection1 rebellion1 or hopelessness1 but as a means to an end4 ,for everyone shall be salted with fire1 says ,scripture2 and can anything whatever be well forged or made without it be first melted and cleaned8 ,so1 then1 for each his ,gethsemane4 ,as for ,christ1 so for ,judas1 who1 not being able to endure1 went out and hanged himself4 ,let our care1 then1 be to choose that ,gethsemane which shall open to us the gates of heaven and not hell4 ,in our raw state we fear the ,will of ,god1 thinking it a path of thorns2 but as ,christ moulds and teaches us we grow to know the ,will of ,god as a great ,balm3 to long to conform to it1 joyfully to join it1 to sink into it as into an immense security where we are safe from all ills2 and at last1 no matter what temporary trials we endure1 so great does our love and confidence grow by ,grace of ,god upholding our tiny efforts that1 like ,job1 we cry to ,him with absolute sincerity and confidence1 ,though ,thou slay me1 yet will ,i trust ,thee2 having learnt it is not ,his ,will to slay but to restore and purify and make glad4 ,incessant work is the lot of the awakened and returning soul1 and justly so1 for because of what folly and ingratitude did she ever leave ,god8 ,a multiplicity of choices lie before her1 and her great concern is which amongst all these possible decisions will prove the shortest path to ,god4 ,these choices and decisions must be brought down to the meanest details of everyday life4 ,at first on awakening the soul would like nothing better than to forsake and cast away material things altogether1 and is inclined to despise the body4 ,but ,jesus teaches her that this is not pleasing3 it is ,his ,will that she should continually lend assistance to the creature in its weaknesses and uncertainties1 not disdaining it but helping it4 ,it is the soul which maintains contact with the ,divine ,guide1 and then in turn should guide the creature4 ,as the ,divine ,guide condescends to the soul1 never despising her1 so must the soul condescend to the creature3 acknowledging and understanding that nothing is too small or humble for the soul to attend to and lead the creature to do in a beautiful and gentle manner4 ,by these means the permeation of the natural world by the ,divine is carried out1 and no act or fact of life can be considered too insignificant for the soul to attend to for the development of this aim4 ,the more we become familiar with spiritual life the more we observe the regularity of certain laws in it1 and the more we find analogies between these new and unmapped laws and the laws and forces already known to us in the visible world4 ,rightly expounded by some scientific mind1 these could bring the world of human thought and aspirations straight into the arms of ,god4 ,science is the friend and not the enemy of religion4 ,science will light up and illuminate the dark gaps4 ,this world is a house fully wired for lighting3 the wiring is perfect1 the bulbs alone are incomplete2 they give no light3 it is the task of the soul to perfect these human bulbs4 ,the life of conscious connection with ,god is true living as far as we may know it in the flesh1 an enormous increase over the petty normal life of the world or1 more rightly1 the petty and lacking life of the world4 ,for in this life of ,god-consciousness is an immense sanity and poise1 a balance between soul and body and heart and mind never achieved in the normal or natural life4 ,therefore the ,god-conscious life is not to be named an abnormal but the complete1 full1 and only truly normal life3 a life in which both soul and creature have found their centre1 and the whole being in all its parts is brought to evenness1 to harmony1 to peace and a greatly magnified intelligence4 ,if all men and women attained this state1 this world would automatically become ,paradise4 ,in this true life living and feeling alter their characteristics and surpass anything that can be imagined by the uninitiated mind4 ,now1 though to convey some idea of this condition of consciousness would seem to be impossible1 still there are some types of persons to whom a little something of the commencement of the larger life of the awakened soul might be conveyed before they themselves experience it4 ,the lovers of nature1 of music1 of the beautiful and romantic1 and of poetry3 in the highest moments reached by such they are aware of an indefinable ,something--an expansion1 a going out towards1 a longing--yearning1 subtly composed of both joy and pain1 which goes beyond the earth1 beyond the music1 beyond the poetry1 beyond the beautiful into a ,nameless ,bourne4 ,at these moments they live with the soul3 this is the commencement of spirit-life4 ,when the ,nameless ,bourne has become to the soul that which ,it really is--,god--and ,he sends ,his responses to her1 then the soul knows the fullness of spiritual life as we may know it in the flesh4 ,but she can neither know the ,nameless ,bourne as ,god nor receive ,his responses till the heart and the mind have come to repentance of their ways and have been changed at least in part4 ,without this mode of living no one can be said to live in a full or whole manner1 because nothing is whole which does not include the consciousness of ,god1 and this in a lively and acute degree4 ,one of our great difficulties is that when1 as the merely half-repentant creature1 we turn to ,god and1 beginning to ask favours of ,him1 get no response1 then all our warm feelings and longings towards ,him fall back1 we go into a state either of profounder unbelief 7which is further separation7 or into total apathy4 ,apathy is a deadly thing4 ,the more ,god loves us the more ,he will do ,his part to keep us from it4 ,all the circumstances of life will be used to this end4 ,we may lose our nearest and dearest4 ,if it is material prosperity that causes a too complete content to live without ,him1 then some or all of that prosperity will be removed4 ,in whatever spot we are most tender--there ,he will touch us4 ,oh1 if it had been anyone else or anything less that we had lost1 then it would not have been so hard to bear1 we say4 ,exactly4 ,for nothing less would have been of any use1 and alas6 even this may be of no use1 for ,christ is ever willing and trying to save us1 and we will not be saved4 ,if we do not get out of this apathy1 we shall miss the whole reason of our life here4 ,by these living thrusts ,he brings us to our knees1 humbled1 humiliated1 anguished1 in order that1 having awakened and purified us1 ,he may lift us into ,his ,divine consolations4 ,we cannot in one step mount up out of our faithless indifferent wrongful condition into the glories of the knowledge of ,god4 ,first we must learn to know ,jesus1 intimately1 devotedly4 ,then ,jesus the ,christ3 then the ,father4 ,finally ,god the ,holy ,trinity1 once found and known by us1 becomes our ,all1 and by some unspeakable condescension ,he becomes to us all things in all ways4 ,the soul is filled with romantic and divine love1 and instantly ,god is her ,holy ,lover3 she is sad1 weary1 or afraid1 and immediately she turns to ,him ,he comforts and mothers her3 she is filled with adoring filial love1 and at once ,he is her ,father4 ,oh1 the wonders of the fullness of the finding and knowing of ,god6 ,let the man who would know happiness here study the works of ,god1 and not think he will gain virtue by putting everything that he sees here upon one side1 saying it is not real or it is not good4 ,it is very real of its own kind1 and good also if he learns how to use it1 and very marvellous4 ,let him study how things are made--,god's things1 not trivial man-made things--let him observe how all are made with equal care1 the humblest and the proudest1 the tiny violet perfect as the oak4 ,let him learn the manner of the ways of light and the colours of all that he sees199 and then stop to consider how1 having made all these marvels1 ,god then fashioned his own delicate eyes that he might see and know and enjoy them all4 ,to consider all these things1 accepting them from ,god with love1 makes the heart and the mind and the soul dance and sing together not with noise but like sunshine upon water4 99 ,scientific ,ideas of ,to-day1 by ,c4 ,gibson4 ,what is ,nature but the demonstration in visible objects of an invisible ,will8 ,this ,will we need to trace to its ,source2 having done this1 we are able to praise and bless ,god for every single thing of beauty ,he has fashioned here3 and this praising and blessing of ,god becomes nothing less than a continual ecstasy for both soul and creature1 and1 indeed1 because of this and by means of this burning appreciation of ,god's works1 both soul and creature find their sweetest consolations as they wait to be taken to a holier world4 ,when they both bless ,god with the fire of their love for every tender thing that ,he has made1 then their days become to them one long delight4 ,this blessing of ,god and ,his works is not just a blessing with lips1 but feels this way4 ,the words being said by the heart1 a burning spark of enthusiasm is immediately kindled there1 which spark sets light to a spark in the soul2 and this invisible fire joining another ,invisible ,fire1 instantly in immense exaltation we enter the joys of ,god4 ,but because of our flesh we cannot stay but only enter and come back4 ,we are made to love and adore ,god1 but the mode of entry into this is not by beseeching ,god to come down and love us1 but by constant endeavour to enter up into ,his estate1 to offer ,him love3 this enthusiasm for ,god brings about a mysterious accomplishment of all needs1 desires1 joys4 ,we are made to love and adore ,god1 and because of this without ,him we are an ,emptiness1 a ,great ,want4 ,such is the lovely and perfect reciprocity of love that as this ,great ,want we are the pleasure and the joy of the ,all-,giving ,god4 ,and ,he is the ,all-,giving that ,he may rejoice and fill our extremity of ,want4 ,so we are each to each that which each most desires4 ,this is ,divine ,love4 ,do not let us imagine that by making very much of earthly loves we shall by that obtain the heavenly3 on the contrary1 love of creatures1 and too much turning to and thinking of and depending upon creatures1 is a sure manner of hindering us till we have learnt to unite with ,divine ,love4 ,this love for creatures is often for the heart and soul what treacle is to the wings of a fly6 ,do not be content with creatures1 but seek beyond the creaturely for the heavenly4 ,this is not to say that we are not to love our fellow-creatures1 attend to them1 wait upon them1 bear with them1 and work for them2 but whilst doing all these we are not to make them the object of our life3 we are not to think that by merely running about amongst creatures frenzied with plans for their social improvement and comfort the nearer we are necessarily getting to ,god1 or even truly pleasing ,him4 ,all these multiplicities of frenzied interests are best centred upon the finding and knowing and loving of ,jesus ,christ within our own hearts4 ,when this finding1 knowing1 loving and believing has been accomplished1 then we shall have accomplished the only work ,god asks us to accomplish1 and all other works will automatically1 peacefully1 and smoothly come to their proper fruition in us through ,him4 ,neither imagine we shall do this finding of ,jesus in1 or because of1 another person4 ,we shall not find ,him in another person or anywhere till we have first found ,him in ourselves3 and this by inward pondering1 delicate tender thinkings1 loving comparisons1 sweet enthusiasms1 persistent endeavours to imitate ,his gentle ways and manners as being some proof of our desire to love and find ,him4 ,the need which is the most pressing of all our needs is to find that ,light which will light us when we have to go out from the light of this world into the awful solitudes of that which we often so lightly and confidently speak of as the other world4 ,without ,christ we go out into a fearful loneliness3 with ,christ we walk the rainbow paths of ,paradise4 99 99 99 ,having tasted the blissful wonders of ,god1 nothing less than ,god ,himself can satisfy1 comfort1 or fill either the soul1 heart1 or mind2 and yet we are still in a too small and imperfect condition to endure the power and strength of ,god's bliss for more than brief spells1 so that after coming to these high things our portion here is to learn to be a useful willing servant1 carrying with as cheerful a face as we are able the burden of life in the flesh1 and endure this waiting to be with ,christ free of the flesh4 ,what are these blisses of ,god8 ,they are contact with an immeasurable ,ardour1 they are our ardour meeting the ,fountain of all ,ardours3 and ,god is communicated to us by a magnetism which in its higher degrees becomes luminous and unbearable4 ,are these divine joys and comforts of ,god towards us because we are more loved by ,god1 because our salvation is more sure than that of those who are without these comforts8 ,most emphatically no4 ,it is because we obey a particular and subtle law of giving to ,god1 and do not 7as is more natural to us7 content ourselves with merely believing1 expecting1 and hoping to receive from ,god4 ,let us pray more frequently than we do3 ,my ,lord1 increase my faith1 increase my love1 and increase my understanding of how to use this faith and this love when they have been begotten in me4 99 99 99 ,on every side we hear complaints against the ,church4 ,it is suggested that we are falling away from ,god because of some lack in the ,church4 ,but this fault of the ,church is exactly the same fault which is to be found in the members of the congregation which compose it--a tepid love for a dimly known ,lord4 ,when the priest and every member of the congregation in his own heart worships the beloved ,christ1 then the ,church will be found to have gained just that which is now lacking1 and which we attribute to some priestly failure and not our own also4 ,of ,church ceremonials it is hard to speak1 for the lover of ,god can have no eyes for them3 he is all heart1 but sees it this way--that set rules1 regulations1 and ceremonials in prayers and worship are most right and proper for the creature publicly worshipping its ,creator4 ,that the assembling together in church is the outward and visible acknowledgment of the creature's worship of ,god and also a looking for the fulfilling of the promise where two or three are gathered together in ,my name4 ,the redeemed creature worships very ardently with all its little heart and mind and all its tiny strength1 learning in its own self the words of ,david3 ,i was glad when they said unto me1 ,we will go into the house of the ,lord4 ,but the soul cannot worship in set words1 neither can she have need or use for the ceremonials invented by and for the creature1 but worships ,god in another manner altogether1 as she is taught by the ,holy ,spirit1 and in the greatness of her worship mounts to ,god1 and closes with ,god4 ,for holy love cannot long be divided4 ,often when the creature is alone1 and eating1 its ,lord will visit it1 causing the soul and the mind and the heart of it to cry out3 ,but of what use to me is this meat and drink which is before me8 ,i have no need of it1 ,i can do nothing other than sip of the holy beauty of my ,lord4 ,and immediately we are so pressed the earthly cup must be set down1 and in very great ecstasy we sup in spirit with the ,lord4 ,the unnameable ,elixir of ,god is the ,wine1 and ,love is the ,bread4 ,when holy love grows great in us we wonder that we ever thought that human love was love at all1 for no matter how great it may once have seemed it now seems so small it is no greater than the humming of a bee around a flower in summer time4 ,but holy love--who can commence to describe it8 ,it rides upon great wings1 it burns like a devouring fire1 it makes nothing of ,space and comes before ,him like the lightnings1 saying1 ,here am ,i1 and1 gathering all things1 all loves into itself1 pours them out at the feet of ,god4 ,by baptism we are named and called for election by the ,church4 ,through personal and individual repentance and connection by faith and love with ,christ we enter election by baptism of the ,holy ,spirit4 ,by the mere following of rituals1 doctrines1 dogmas1 ceremonies1 we are in great danger of introducing the mind of the ,pharisee with his reliance as means of salvation upon the washing of hands and cups1 and except we exceed this righteousness we do not enter the ,kingdom4 ,or the mind of the lawyer1 which type of mind seeks obstinately1 forcefully1 to mould the secrets of the soul's communion with ,god and fix them upon cold documents where they quickly cease to have life4 99 99 99 ,above the fretful and contentious human reason is the intelligence of the soul1 and this soul has in itself a higher part for we become acutely aware of it--that part of it with which we come in contact with ,god1 with which we respond to ,god1 receive ,his manifestations1 are laid bare to ,his blisses4 ,separated from worldly things by an impalpable veil1 it rests above all such things in serene calm1 and1 strangest of all1 has no comprehension whatever of sin3 when we enter this part of the soul and live with it sin and evil become not only non-existent but unthinkable1 unimaginable3 we are totally removed from any such order of existence4 ,it communicates its knowledge to the lower part of the soul1 the soul to the ,reason1 the ,reason to the rest of the creature4 ,we say we are fearfully and wonderfully made1 and in saying this we think of the body1 but far more wonderful is the making of the spiritual of us4 ,o man1 climb out of the gross materialism of thy fleshly self1 for thou canst do it6 ,as out of the heavy earth come the delicate flowers of spring1 so out of the heavy body1 because of that divine which is within it1 come the marvellous flowers of the soul4 ,to think that we can come to ,god and know ,him by means of our intelligence or reason is as unwise as to suppose we can eat our dinner with our feet2 it is as necessary to use our teeth to eat our food as it is to use our heart to find ,god1 and it is nothing but the natural vanity of the human mind which blinds us to this fact4 ,the human reason is too small to stand the greatness of ,god1 and could it ever reach to ,him would be withered in the awfulness of ,his magnetic light4 ,even the soul in her contacts with ,god whilst still in the flesh is of necessity totally blind1 and yet1 blind as she is1 is pierced by this terrible intensity of light and energy4 ,how then shall the reason stand naked before ,god without madness or frenzy8 ,to reason out upon paper where ,god is1 why ,he is1 what ,he is1 and how precisely ,he is to be discovered1 will take us no further up into the mysteries of the actual knowing of the wonders of ,his love than the ink and paper we employ might do4 ,to know this love in our own heart is the necessity1 for the soul and the heart live hand in hand as it were and together can find and know ,god4 ,god once found by the heart1 we can dwell upon ,him with our reason1 and feed our reason with the knowledge we have acquired of ,him through the heart and soul4 ,the ,holy ,ghost aids us in this deep search1 quickens us1 gives us impulses4 ,at first in our natural state we are able only in a very dim way to perceive these impulses1 but we can become so sensitive to ,god that ,he pierces us1 brings us to the ground with a breath1 and we bend and yield before ,his lightest wish as a reed bends and quivers to the wind4 ,when the heart and soul are greatly set upon ,god and we have become true lovers of ,god1 there comes a danger of falling into so deep a pining for ,god that the health both of the mind and of the body is weakened by it4 ,we should aim at cheerful and willing waiting3 anything else is a falling short2 if we examine into it1 we shall see that pining savours of unwillingness and discontent--there is in it something of the spirit of the servant who designs to give notice of leaving4 ,the lover of ,god is the most blest of all creatures and should show himself serenely glad1 waiting with patience1 knowing as he does from his own experiences that who has ,god for a ,lover has no need of any other4 ,of how to receive from ,god1 and of the ,blessed ,sacrament ,nothing is of a deeper mystery or difficulty or disappointment to the soul and the heart well advanced in the experience and in the love of ,god than to find that in the ceremony of the ,blessed ,sacrament it is possible for them to be less sensible of receiving from ,god than at any time4 ,how and why can this be8 is it the ,ceremonial causing the mind to be too much alert to guide the body now to rise1 now to kneel1 now to move in some direction8 ,is it this distraction which prevents perception--for in all communion with ,god the mind is closed down1 the heart and soul only being in operation8 ,on the other hand1 it is easily possible to be in closest communion with ,god in all the noises and distractions of a great railway station amongst a crowd of shifting persons4 ,no1 it is some imperfection in the attitude adopted by the heart and mind in approaching this ,sacrament4 ,in what way have we perhaps been approaching it8 ,in an attitude of awe accompanied by a humble expectancy or hope of receiving4 ,we hope and believe we shall receive ,god's grace4 ,now1 the experienced soul and heart know so well what it is and how it feels to receive ,god's grace that they are all the more disappointed at not receiving it upon this holy occasion4 ,what were our ,lord's words8 ,he said1 ,do this in remembrance of ,me1 or more correctly translated1 ,do or offer this as a memorial of ,me before ,god4 ,this implies an act of giving upon our part1 whereas we have come to regard this ceremony as an act of receiving4 ,now though the attitude of humble expectancy to receive is of itself a worthy one it does not fulfil the exact command1 which is to commemorate1 offer1 and hold up before ,god the ,perfect ,love and ,sacrifice of our ,saviour1 as a living memorial of ,him before ,god4 ,it should be accompanied by an offering of great love and thanks upon our part without regard to anything we may receive4 ,but because first we give we then receive4 ,about nothing are we in such a state of ignorance as about the laws which govern the give and take between ,god and ,man4 ,on the one hand is ,god the ,all-,giving1 longing to bestow1 and upon the other is ,man the all-needing1 aching to receive1 and between them an impasse4 ,failure to fulfil ,god's laws is the cause of this impasse4 ,there is both a law of like to like1 and a law of like to opposite4 ,we cannot know ,god without in some small degree first being like ,god1 and to be like ,god we must not only be pure in heart but also conform to the ,god-like condition of giving4 ,first we obey this law that the second may come into effect--that of like to opposite1 or positive to negative1 the ,all-,giving immediately meeting and filling the all-needing4 ,we have nothing to give to ,god but our love1 thanks1 and obedience2 but of these it is possible to give endlessly1 and the more we give the more ,god-like do we become1 and the more ,god-like the higher and further do we enter into the great riches and blisses of ,god4 ,therefore the more we give to ,god the more we receive4 ,on going to partake of the ,blessed ,sacrament we do well to banish from the heart and mind all thought of what it may please ,god to still further give us and to make an offering to ,god4 ,the only way we can make an offering to ,god is upon the wings of love1 and upon this love we hold up before ,him the bread and wine as the ,body and ,blood of our ,redeemer1 repeating and repeating in our heart1 ,i eat and drink ,this as a memorial before ,thee of the ,perfect ,love and ,sacrifice of ,jesus ,christ4 ,when we so do with great love in our heart we find that we are able sensibly to receive great grace4 ,of ,prayer ,of the many kinds and degrees of prayer first perhaps we learn the prayer of the lips1 then that of the mind1 then the prayer of the heart1 and finally the prayer of the soul--prayer of a totally different mode and order1 prayer of a strange incalculably great magnetic power1 prayer which enables us to count on help from ,god as upon an absolute and immediate certainty4 ,we find this about perfect prayer that it is not done as from a creature beseeching a ,creator at an immense distance1 but is done as a love-flash which1 eating up all distance1 is immediately before and with the ,creator and is accompanied by vivid certainty at the heart2 this latter is active faith2 we have too much perhaps of that kind of faith which may be named waiting or passive faith4 ,this combination of love with active faith instantly opens to us ,god's help4 ,we may or may not receive this in the form anticipated by the creature1 but later perceive that we have received it in exactly that form which would most lastingly benefit us4 ,after a while we cease almost altogether from petitioning anything for ourselves1 having this one desire only3 that by opening ourselves to ,god by means of offering ,him great love1 we receive ,himself4 ,of ,contemplation ,to enter the contemplation of ,god is not absence of will1 nor laziness of will1 but great energy of will because of1 and for1 love3 in which love-condition the energy of the soul will be laid bare to the energy of ,god1 the two energies for the time being becoming closely united or oned1 in which state the soul-will or energy is wholly lifted into the glorious ,god-,energy1 and a state of unspeakable bliss and an immensity of living is immediately entered and shared by the soul4 ,bliss1 ecstasy1 rapture1 all are energy1 and according as the soul is exposed to lesser or greater degrees of this energy1 so she enters lesser or greater degrees of raptures4 ,it is misleading in these states of ecstasy to say that the soul has vision1 if by vision is to be understood anything that has to do with concrete forms or any kind of sight2 for the soul is totally blind4 ,but she makes no account of this blindness and has her fill of all bliss and of the knowledge of another manner of living without any need whatever of sight4 ,has the wind eyes or feet8 yet it possesses the earth and is not prevented4 ,so the soul1 without eyes and without hands1 possesses ,god4 ,contact with ,god is then of the nature of the ,infusion of ,energy4 ,the infusions of this energy may take the form of causing us to have an acute intense perception and consciousness 7but not such form of perception as would permit us to say ,i saw1 but a magnetic inward cognisance1 a fire of knowledge which scintillates about the soul and pierces her7 of ,his perfections2 of ,his tenderness1 ,his sweetness1 ,his holiness1 ,his beauty4 ,when either of these last two are made known to her1 the soul passes into what can only be named as an agony of bliss1 insupportable even to the soul for more than a very brief time1 and because of the fearful stress of it the soul draws away and prays to be covered from the unbearable happiness of it1 this being granted her whether automatically 7that is to say1 because of spiritual law7 or whether by direct and merciful will of ,god--who is able to tell8 ,such experiences are not for the timid1 but require steady courage and perfect loving trust in ,god4 ,contemplation even in its highest forms is not to be confused with spiritual experiences1 which are totally apart from anything else that we may know in life--they are entirely outside of our volition1 they are not to be prayed for1 they are not to be even secretly desired1 but to be accepted how and when and if ,god so chooses4 ,in contemplation the will is used1 and we are not able to come to it without the will is penetratingly used towards the joining and meeting with the will and love of ,god4 ,in the purely spiritual experience from first to last there is no will but an absence of will1 a total submission and yielding to ,god1 without questioning1 without fear1 without curiosity1 and the only will used is to keep ourselves in willingness to submit to whatever ,he shall choose to expose us to4 ,god does not open to us such experiences in order to gratify curiosity--but expecting that we shall learn and profit by them4 ,first we find them an immense and unforgettable assurance of another form of living1 of great intensity1 at white heat1 natural to a part of us with which we have hitherto been unfamiliar 7the soul7 but inimical to the body1 which suffers grievously whilst the soul glows with marvellous vitality and joy4 ,this assurance of another manner of living1 though we see nothing with the eyes1 is the opening of another world to us4 ,the invisible becomes real1 faith becomes transformed in knowledge4 ,if the hundred wisest men of the world should all prove upon paper that the spiritual life as a separate and other life from the physical life does not exist1 it would cause nothing but a smile of compassion to the creature that had experience4 ,god teaches us by these means to become balanced1 poised1 and a complete human being1 combining in one personality or consciousness the ,spiritual and the ,material4 ,but we are not given and shown these mysteries without paying a price3 we must learn to live in extraordinary lowliness and loneliness of spirit4 ,the interests1 enjoyments1 pastimes of ordinary life dry up and wither away4 ,it becomes in vain that we seek to satisfy ourselves in any occupation1 in anything1 in any persons1 for ,god wills to have the whole of us4 ,when ,he wills to be sensibly with us1 all ,space itself feels scarcely able to contain our riches and our happiness4 ,when ,he wills to disconnect us from this nearness1 there is nothing in all the universe so poor1 so destitute1 so sad1 so lonely as ourself4 ,and there is no earthly thing can beguile or console us1 because1 having tasted of ,god1 it is impossible to be satisfied or consoled save inwardly by ,god ,himself4 ,but ,he opens up ,nature to us in a marvellous way1 unbelievable until experienced4 ,he offers us ,nature as a sop to stay our tears4 ,by means of ,nature ,he even in absence caresses the soul and the creature1 speaks to them fondly1 encourages and draws them after ,him1 sending acute and wonderful perceptions to them1 so that1 quite consoled1 they cry aloud to ,him with happiness4 ,and often when the creature is alone and secure from being observed by anyone ,he will open ,his glamour to the soul and she passes into union with paradise and even more--high heaven itself4 ,these are angels' delights which ,he lavishes upon the prodigal4 ,another heavy price to be paid is found by the soul and heart and mind in the return from the blissful and perfect calm which surrounds even the lowest degree of the contemplation of ,god to the turmoil of the world4 ,for to have been lifted into this new condition of living1 this glamour1 this crystal joy1 to know such heights1 such immensities1 and to descend from ,god's blisses to live the everyday life of this world and accept its pettiness is a great pain1 in which pain we are of necessity not understood by fellow-creatures2 therefore the more and the more we become pressed into that great loneliness which is the inevitable portion of the true lover1 and experience the pain of those prolonged spiritual conflicts in which the soul learns to bend and submit to the petty sordidness of life in a world which has forgotten ,god4 ,it is the lack of courage and endurance to perpetually weather these dreadful storms which causes us to turn to seclusion--the cloister4 ,to refrain from doing this and to remain in the world though not of it is the sacrifice of the loving soul--she has but the one to make--to leave the delights of ,god1 and for the sake of being a useful servant to ,jesus to pick up the daily life in the world2 which sacrifice is in direct contrariety to the sacrifice of the creature1 which counts its sacrifices as a giving up of the things of the world4 ,so by opposites they may come to one similarity--perfection4 ,how to conduct itself in all these difficult ways so foreign to its own earthly nature is a hard problem for the creature1 belonging so intimately to this world which it can touch and see3 and yet which it is asked by ,god bravely to climb out of into the unknown and the unseen4 ,bewildered by the enormous demands of the soul which can never rest in any happiness without she is contemplating ,god1 adoring ,him1 conversing with ,him1 blessing and worshipping ,him1 the poor creature is often bewildered to know how to conduct the ordinary affairs and duties of life under such pressures4 ,of its emotions1 of the tears that it sheds1 of the falls that it takes1 a library of books might be written4 ,in the splendour1 the grandeur1 the great magnitudes and expanses of spirit life as made known to it by the soul1 the creature feels like some poor beggar child1 ill-mannered1 ill-clothed1 which by strange fortune finds itself invited to the house of a mighty king1 and1 dumb with humility and admiration1 is at a loss to understand the condescension of this mighty lord4 ,in this sense of very great unworthiness lies a profound pain1 an agony4 ,to cure this pain we must turn the heart to give love1 to think love1 and immediately we think of this great condescension as being for love's sake--as love seeking for love--we are consoled4 ,then all is well1 all is joyful1 all is divine4 ,the more simple1 childlike1 and unpretentious we can be1 the more easily we shall win our way through4 ,pretentiousness or arrogance in ,man can never be anything but ridiculous1 and a sense of humour should alone be sufficient to save us from such error4 ,for the same reason it is impossible to regard human ceremonies with any respect or seriousness1 for they are not childlike but childish4 ,how often the heart and mind cry out to ,him1 ,o mighty ,god1 ,i am mean and foolish--mean in that which ,i have created by my vain imaginings1 my pride1 my covetousness2 but in that which ,thou hast made me ,i am wonderful and lovely--a thing that can fly to and fro day or night to ,thy hand6 ,the difficulties of the creature should not be raised on some self-glorifying pinnacle merely because the fickle variable heart at lasts learns the exercise of ,fidelity4 ,do we not see a very ordinary dog practising this same fidelity as he waits1 so eager that he trembles1 outside his master's door1 having put on one side every desire save his desire to his master whom1 not seeing1 he continues to await2 and this out of the generosity of his heart6 ,and we8 ,only by great difficulty1 long endeavour1 bitter schooling1 and having at last accomplished it we name each other saints or saintly4 ,let us think soberly about these things2 are we then so much less than a dog that we also cannot accomplish this fidelity--so that though hands and feet go about daily duties the heart and mind are fixed on the ,master8 ,then the ,master becomes the ,beloved4 ,of ,blessing ,god ,at first when the creature is being taught to bless ,god it shrinks back in a fright1 crying1 ,what am ,i that ,i should dare to bless ,almighty ,god1 ,i am afraid to do it2 ,i am too unworthy2 let me wait till ,i am more righteous1 till ,i have done more works4 ,then the divine soul counsels it so3 ,think no more about thyself1 moaning and groaning over thine unworthiness and trusting to progress in works4 ,cease thinking of thyself1 and rise up and think only of ,god4 ,thou wilt never be worthy1 and all thy works are nothing and thy learning of no count whatever2 and as to thy righteousness1 is it not written that it is as filthy rags8 ,all that ,god will give thee is not for any merits or works of thine1 but for ,love's sake4 ,he desires both to give thee love and to receive thy love1 therefore rise and worship ,him1 give ,him all the love that thou hast2 keep none back either for thyself1 or anything or any creature1 but give all that thou hast to ,him with tears and songs and gladness4 ,timidly the creature obeys1 and with all its powers and strength it blesses ,god1 and instantanteously ,god blesses the creature1 sending ,his sweetness and ,his glamour about it3 and the more the soul and the creature bless ,god the more does ,he bless them1 and they bless ,him from the bed of sickness and pain as fully as they bless ,him in health4 ,they bless ,him in the night-time and in the noonday1 they bless ,him as they walk1 they bless ,him as they work1 and because of this little bit of blessing and love that the two of them offer to ,god ,he offers them all heaven in ,himself4 ,it is the duty of the soul to constantly lend counsel1 courage1 help1 advice1 and strength to the creature1 and we are conscious of the voice of the soul1 which without any sound yet makes itself inwardly heard1 calling to the selfishness1 the egoism of the creature1 urging the higher part of it to come higher and the animal in it to become pure and to subdue itself1 saying to it1 ,lie down and be quiet1 or thou wilt bring disaster to us both4 ,i cannot be quiet1 for ,i could groan with my restless distress4 ,cease to think of thyself with thy roarings and groanings4 ,lay hold of love which thinks nothing of itself but always of that which it may give to the ,beloved4 ,i cannot do this2 ,i am no angel nor even a saint1 but a most ordinary creature1 forsaken of ,god and miserable4 ,thou art never forsaken1 but thy door is closed3 it opens from thy side1 and thou art thyself standing across it and blocking the opening of it--,i will show thee how to open it1 cry and moan no more for favours and gifts1 but do thou thyself do the giving4 ,since thou dost not know at all how to begin--do it with these set words3 ',i love and praise ,thee1 ,i love and bless and thank ,thee1 ,i love and bless and worship ,thee'2 and see thou do it with all thy heart and mind and strength and with no thought of thyself and future benefits1 but entirely that thou mayest give ,him pleasure4 ,then the creature tries1 but fails lamentably1 for most of its heart and mind is on itself and a fraction only on ,god4 ,now try again and again and again1 cries the soul1 ,o thou miserable halfhearted shallow worldling6 ,and the creature tries again1 and1 doing better1 gets a very slight warmth about the heart2 and1 doing it again1 gets a little comfort1 and so1 gradually progressing in the way of true love which is all giving1 at last one day the creature does it perfectly because it has altogether forgotten itself in the fire of its love and is completely set upon ,god4 ,then automatically the door opens1 and immediately in through it there rushes the breath and the blisses of ,god4 ,and the creature1 weeping with excess of happiness1 cries1 ,i never asked for such delights1 ,i did not know such happiness was to be had2 and if ,i did not ask1 how is it that ,i have received8 ,then the soul answers1 ,because thou hast learnt to give to ,god1 and that is the key which unlocks the garden of ,his joys4 ,thou hast just three things which ,he desires to have--thy love and thine obedience1 and thy waiting fidelity4 ,when thou dost conform to ,his desire with all thy tiny unadulterated strength1 immediately heaven becomes open to thee and thou dost receive more than thou didst ever dream or think to ask for4 ,this is ,his lovely ,will towards thee4 ,but first always do thy part1 and until thou doest thy part ,i cannot begin mine1 for thou couldst receive neither blessings nor blisses did ,i not receive them first from ,him and hand them on to thee2 so each are dependent the one on the other1 and only together can we enter paradise4 ,think not ,i do not suffer as much as thyself and far more4 ,i know thou dost suffer with thy body and with the losses of thine earthly loves1 but ,i suffer far more with the loss of my ,heavenly ,love4 ,at first ,i could not understand what had come to me1 buried and choked in thy strange house of flesh4 ,i despised thee1 ,i hated thee1 thy stupid ways1 thy dreadful greeds1 thine unspeakable obstinacy and unwillingness2 thou didst give me horrible sicknesses with thine unsavoury wants1 thine undignified requirements4 ,i thought thee foolish and now know myself to be more foolish than thee1 for thou hardly knowest the heavenly love whereas ,i knew and left ,him1 seeking other loves4 ,the ,fall was not thy fault1 poor human thing1 but mine4 ,i am the ,prodigal1 and thou the means of my return1 for if ,i can but raise thee to true adoration of our ,god1 then ,i shall pay my debt of infidelity to ,him and together as one glorious radiant spirit we shall enter heaven again4 ,only listen and ,i can guide thee1 for the ,master speaks to me and tells me what to do4 ,i am partly that which thou dost please to call thy conscience1 and thou dost treat me shockingly1 buffeting and wounding me when ,i try to whisper to thee3 if thou art not careful1 thou wilt so disable me that all our chance of happiness will be spoiled4 ,do thou listen very tenderly for my voice1 for ,i am of gossamer and thou of strangely heavy clay4 ,of ,evil and ,temptation and of ,grace ,the heart and soul are subject to four principal glamours3 the glamour of youth1 the glamour of romance1 the glamour of evil1 and the glamour of ,god4 ,when once the ,spirit of ,love1 which is ,god1 descends into our soul then a new light becomes created in us by which we see the glamour of evil in its true form and complexion4 ,we see it as disease1 misery1 imprisonment1 and death2 and who finds it difficult to turn away from such8 ,the natural man sees evil as an intense attraction1 the spiritual man as a horror of ugliness4 ,see then how the ,spirit of ,love is at once and easily our ,salvation4 ,amongst all mysteries none seems greater to us than the mystery of ,evil4 ,god--,goodness--,love3 these we understand4 ,but evil--whence and why1 since ,god is ,love1 ,omnipotence1 and ,holiness8 ,we cannot but observe that all things have their opposites3 summer and winter1 heat and cold1 light and dark1 silence and sound1 pleasure and pain1 life and death1 action and repose1 joy and sadness1 illness and health2 and how shall we know or have true pleasure in the one without we have also knowledge of the opposite8 ,the man who has never known sickness has neither true gratitude1 understanding1 nor pleasure in his heart over his good health3 he does not know that which he possesses4 ,neither can we know the great glory that is ,holiness till we have known evil and can contrast the two4 ,but what a price to pay for knowledge2 what fearful risk and danger to ,his creatures for ,god so to teach them6 we may cry1 forgetting that with ,god all things are possible1 ,who is able and strong to save4 ,and does ,he dare set ,himself no difficult thing that ,he may overcome it8 ,the strong man's knowledge of his own courage forbids us think it4 ,god wills to save us4 ,we have but to join our will with ,his1 and we are saved4 ,how shall we mount to ,god other than by mounting upon that which offers a foundation of tangible resistance1 overcoming and mounting upon evil4 ,evil then becomes our stairway--the servant of ,good4 ,by using the evil that we meet with day by day1 we mount daily the nearer to ,god by that exact degree of evil which we have overcome by good--that is to say1 by practice of forgiveness1 compassion1 patience1 humility1 endurance1 held out over against the invitation of evil to do the exact opposite4 ,a negligent1 thieving1 lying servant that we have to deal with calls forth forgiveness1 and humility also1 for are we a perfect servant to our ,lord8 ,the evil of a drunken husband may be used by the wife as a sure ladder to ,god1 for because of this evil she may learn to practise all the virtues of the saints4 ,truly if we have the will to use it1 ,evil is friendly4 ,if we misuse ,evil--that is to say1 if we do not use it by mounting on it but1 intoxicated with its glamour1 consent to it1--this is ,sin1 and immediately the stairway is not that of ascent but of descent and death4 ,the ,master says ,resist not evil4 ,how are we to understand this but by assuming that if we try our strength against ,evil1 ,evil is likely to overcome us8 but on being confronted with ,evil we should instantly hold on to and join with the forces of ,good and so have strength quietly to continue side by side with ,evil without being seduced by it4 ,when ,evil cannot seduce--that is to say1 make us consent to it1--then for us it is conquered4 ,when we give in or conform to this seduction we generate ,sin4 ,let us say that we are in temptation1 that ,evil of some sort confronts and invites us2 if we battle with this presentment1 this picture1 this insinuating invitation held out before us by ,evil1 the act of contending with the invitation will fix it all the more firmly in our minds4 ,we need to substitute another picture1 another invitation1 another presentment1 of that which pertains to the good and the beautiful4 ,he who has learnt so to substitute and present before his own heart and mind ,jesus and the pure and beautiful invitations of this ,divine ,jesus can solve the difficulty4 ,this is not contending1 this is substituting2 this is transferring allegiance from the glamour of ,evil which is present with us1 to the glamour of ,god1 which1 because we are in temptation1 is not present1 but is yet hoped and waited for4 ,to return again to the lying1 dishonest1 and negligent servant4 ,if we argue1 contend1 and battle morally with this evil servant we do not alter him1 but by this contention generate antagonism4 ,then what is our own position8 ,bad temper1 a disturbed heart1 an inharmonious angry mind2 but if without contending we bear with and act gently with this evil1 making careful comparisons with our own service to our own ,lord1 we learn patience1 forgiveness1 and humility also1 for have we never lied1 have we never been dishonest1 have we never been negligent to this sweet ,lord8 ,then immediately ,his patience1 ,his forgiveness1 ,his love are brought more intimately to our consciousness1 and our heart nearer to ,his and ,his to ours4 ,is this loss or gain8 ,is ,evil then an enemy8 ,no1 a handmaid4 ,so is ,satan made a servant to his ,overlord1 and his power crossed4 ,of all false things nothing is more false than the glamour of ,evil1 for when on being drawn into it we sin1 instead of the hoped-for delight we soon find satiety2 instead of exhilaration1 fatigue2 instead of contentment1 disillusion2 instead of satisfaction1 dust2 instead of romance1 the greedy claws of the harpy2 and the further we go in response to this glamour the more pitiable our outlook2 for the sweets and possibilities of ,evil are extraordinarily limited4 ,can any man devise a new sin8 ,no1 but ever pursues the same old round1 the same pitiful circle4 ,if we pursue the glamour of ,god1 we find the exact opposite of all these things4 ,spiritual delights know no satiety because of infinite variety3 they know no disease1 no disillusionment1 and who can set a boundary or limit to the beautiful1 to love1 and light1 and ,god8 ,it is characteristic of temptation that while we are exposed to it ,christ is absent from perception2 for to perceive ,christ would instantly free us from all temptation 7and often it is by temptation faithfully borne that we mount74 ,when we are in a condition of contact with ,christ which is ,his grace1 we are raised above the stem of faith into the flowers of knowledge2 but for the true strengthening of the will it is necessary that we live also on the harder and more difficult meat of faith4 ,so we return again and again to that insulation from things heavenly in which we lived before we had been made ,aware4 ,when we emerge from these dark periods we find ourselves to have advanced4 ,with regard to ,grace we can neither truly receive nor benefit by it without our heart1 mind1 and soul are previously adjusted to ,response to it4 ,the regenerated creature is not exempt from further temptations1 but contrariwise the poignancy of these temptations is greatly increased 7though of a quite different order of temptation to that known to us in an unregenerated state72 it is increased in proportion to the degrees of ,grace vouchsafed to us4 ,that is to say1 temptation keeps level with our utmost capacity of resistance yet never is allowed to exceed the bounds1 for when it would exceed them a way out is found by the return of ,grace2 and we are freed4 ,the cause is the great root called ,self1 a hydra-headed growth of selfishness1 both material and spiritual1 sprouting in all directions4 ,we would seem to be here for ever enclosed as in a glass bottle with this most horrid growth4 ,through the glass we see all life1 but always and ever in company with this voracious ,self4 ,no sooner do we lop off one shoot of it than another grows--never was such strenuous gardening as is required to keep this growth in check1 and every time we lop a shoot we learn another pain4 ,this is the long road to perfection1 for the ,cross is ,i with a stroke through it4 ,who can describe the marvels1 the variations1 the mystery of ,grace8 ,it is a dew and an elixir1 a balm and a fire1 a destroyer of all fear and sorrow1 a delight and an anguish1 for we are martyred1 pierced with long arrows by the longing of the love that it calls forth4 ,it is a sweetness and a might1 a glory and a power in which we are sensibly aware we could walk through a furnace unscathed if ,he bade us to do it4 ,and by it we are lifted in a crystal vase and enclosed in the ,presence of ,god4 99 99 99 ,as a man's desire is so is he4 ,if our desire is entirely towards fleshly things and joys and comforts1 we are sensualists4 ,if our desire is all towards sport and horses1 we are not above horses but rather below them1 for the human animal is full of guile and the horse of obedience and generosity4 ,nevertheless he is no goal for the human to aim at4 ,if we desire the beautiful1 we become beautified and refined4 ,if we desire ,god1 we become godly4 99 99 99 ,it is characteristic of spiritual progress that each step is gained through suffering1 through penetrating faithful endeavours1 through grievous incomprehensible turmoils and discords of the spirit1 worked frequently by means of the everyday commonplace happenings and responsibilities of our daily life2 and finally as each new step is gained we are by ,grace carried to it in a flood of divine happiness to crown our woes4 ,grace is ,god's magnetic power acting directly and immediately upon us and is altogether independent of place1 time1 services1 sacraments1 or ceremonies4 ,we limit ,god's communication with us in this way--that ,he is communicable to us only in so far as we ourselves respond and are able1 apt1 and willing to receive ,him4 ,is the condition of blessed nearness to ,god permanent8 ,no1 not as a condition but as a capacity only4 ,we have need to perpetually renew this condition by a positive active enthusiasm toward ,god4 ,we can in laziness no more retain and use this condition as a permanency than we can sleep one night and eat one meal and have these suffice for our lifetime4 ,but slowly1 with work and with pain1 we learn perpetually to regain this condition by that form of prayer which is the spiritual breathing-in of the ,spirit of ,christ4 ,all ,god's help1 all ,god's comfortings are to be had by us by ,grace4 ,this ,grace will constantly be withdrawn so that we may learn that we arrive at nothing by our own power but by gift of ,god1 who is ever willing to give to us provided we whole-heartedly respond4 ,this ,response to ,god is surely amongst the most difficult of our achievements2 unaided by ,grace it is an impossibility1 but we know that every man born into the world is invited by ,christ to ask for and to receive this ,grace4 ,the effect of ,response to ,god is a unity of our tiny force to the ,might-,presence and company of ,god as much as we are able to bear it1 producing in us while with us such wealth of living2 and such happiness as passes all description4 ,as we have capacity to respond to ,god so we shall know that of ,god which is not known by those as yet unlearned in response4 ,for ,god1 we know1 is neither ,this nor ,that1 but so infinitely more than any particularisation that we are able to know ,him only and solely according to our own capacity to receive ,him4 ,to one ,he is a ,personal ,power that ravishes with might1 whose awful magnetism draws the very heart and soul in longing anguish from the body4 ,to another ,he is the dimly known silent ,manipulator of the ,universe1 the secret ,ruler to whose mighty ,will creation bows--because needs must4 ,to another ,he is yet even more remote1 being the unresponsive1 impersonal1 incomprehensible1 immovable ,instigator of all law4 ,what is it in our religion that we need for a full happiness8 ,not the ,god of our mere faith1 nor the ,god of the theologian veiled behind great mysteries of book-learning4 ,it is the ,responsive ,god that we long for1 and how shall we reach ,him8 ,there is one way only--through the taking of ,jesus ,christ firmly and faithfully into our own heart and life4 ,it is not what we now are1 or where we now stand that matters1 but what ,he has the power to bring us to4 ,how is ,god-consciousness to be achieved--shall we do it by study1 by reading8 ,no--for the study or reading of it will do no more than whet the appetite for spiritual things--this is its work1--but can do no more in giving us the actual possession of this joy than the study of a menu can satisfy hunger4 ,individual1 personal and inward possession is in all things our necessity4 ,if our friend has slept well it is no rest to us if we have slept ill4 ,up to a given point in all things each for himself4 ,it is the law4 ,of where this law ends or is superseded by the law of all for all only the ,holy ,spirit can instruct us1 and that inwardly and again each to himself4 ,this state of ,god-consciousness is a gift1 and our work is to qualify for this gift by persistent ardent desire towards ,god continued through every adversity1 through every lack of sensible response on ,his part--a naked will and heart insisting upon ,god4 ,this state of ,god-consciousness once received and in full vigour of life1 there is without doubt about this condition a principle of active contagion1 very noticeable1 very remarkable4 ,that something which would appear frequently to be needed by persons anxious to come to ,god and unable to discover the manner of achieving it1 would seem to be supplied by this contagion1 as though a human spark were often wanted to ignite the spark in another1 which done1 the ,divine ,fire springs up and rapidly grows without further human assistance4 ,we see this contagion as used in its full perfection by ,jesus1 for with all ,his selected followers ,he had but to come in momentary contact with them1 using a word or a look1 and1 instantly forsaking everything1 they followed ,him4 ,was this selection of ,his favouritism8 ,no1 they were prepared to receive this contagion1 and not one of them but had been secretly seeking for ,god2 and this perhaps for long years4 ,to find this new life we need then not the reading of profound books of learning1 not the wisdom of the scholar1 but an inward persistence of the heart and will ,god-wards4 ,this time of insistent waiting is to be endured with all the more courage in that we do not know at what blessed moment we may pierce the veil and the gift come in all its glorious immensity4 ,ten years1 twenty1 thirty--what are such in comparison with the blisses that shall afterwards be ours for all eternity8 ,to look up by day or night into the vastness of the sky with its endless depths1 and as we do it burn with the consciousness of ,god1 this is to truly live4 ,no distance is too great1 no space too wide4 ,all is our home4 ,without this burning consciousness of ,god1 ,space is a thing of fear and ,eternity not to be thought of4 ,of the many experiences and conditions of the soul returning to ,god there is a condition all too easily entered--that of an enervating1 pulseless1 seductive inertia4 ,in this condition of inert but marvellous contentment the soul would love to stay4 ,this is spiritual sensuality1 a spiritual back-water4 ,the true life and energy of the soul are lulled to idleness3 basking in happiness1 the soul ceases to give and becomes merely receptive4 ,this condition is entered from many levels3 we can rise to it 7for it is very high7 from ordinary levels1 branch sideways to it from high contemplation2 drop to it from the greatest contacts with ,god4 ,this condition seems strangely familiar to the soul4 ,so much so that she questions herself4 ,was it from this ,i started on my wanderings from ,god8 ,the true health of the soul when in the blisses of ,god is to be in a state of intense living or activity4 ,she is then in perfect connection with the ,divine ,energy4 ,she is then in a state of an immense and boundless radiantly joyful ,life4 ,to find ,god is to have the scope of all our senses increased1 but it is easily to be understood that our power of suffering increases also1 because we are1 as it were1 flayed and laid bare to everything alike4 ,but it increases our joys to so great a degree that for the first time in life joy is greater than pain1 happiness is greater than sorrow1 knowledge is greater than fear1 and ,good suddenly becomes to us so much greater than ,evil that ,evil becomes negligible4 ,this increase1 this wonderful addition to our former condition1 might be partly conveyed by comparison to a man who from birth has never been able to appreciate music3 for him it has been meaningless1 a noise without suggestion1 without delight1 without wings1 and suddenly by no powers of his own the immense charms and pleasures and capacities of it are laid open to him6 ,these increases of every sense and faculty ,god will give to ,his lovers1 so that without effort and by what has now become to us our own nature we are continually able to enter the ,sublime4 ,of the ,two ,wills ,we have in us two wills4 ,the ,will to live1 and the ,will to love ,god and to find ,him4 ,the first will we see being used continually and without ceasing1 not only by every man1 woman1 and child1 but by every beast of the field and the whole of creation4 ,the ,will to live is the will by which all alike seek the best for themselves1 here gaining for themselves all that they can of comfort and well-being out of the circumstances and opportunities of life4 ,this is our natural ,will4 ,but it is not the will which gains for us ,eternal ,life1 nor does it even gain for us peace and happiness during this life4 ,it is this ,will to live which in ,christ's ,process we are taught to break and bruise till it finally dies1 and the ,will to love1 and gladly and joyously to please ,god is the only ,will by which we live4 ,our great difficulty is that we try at one and the same time to hang to ,god with the soul and to the world with our heart4 ,what is required is not that we go and live in rags in a desert place1 but that in the exact circumstances of life in which we find ourselves we learn in everything to place ,god first4 ,he requires of us a certain subtle and inward fidelity--a fidelity of the heart1 the will1 the mind4 ,the natural state of heart and mind in which we all normally find ourselves is to have temporary vague longings for something which1 though indefinable1 we yet know to be better and more satisfying than anything we can find in the world4 ,this is the soul1 trying to overrule the frivolity of the heart and mind and to re-find ,god4 ,our difficulties are not made of great things1 but of the infinitely small our own caprices4 ,though we can often do great things1 acts of surprising heroism1 we are held in chains--at once elastic and iron--of small capricious vanities1 so that in one and the same hour we may have wonderful1 far-reaching aspirations towards the ,sublime1 and ,god2 and yet there comes a pretty frock1 a pleasant companion1 and behold ,god is forgotten6 ,the mighty and marvellous ,maker of the ,universe1 ,lord of everything1 is placed upon one side for a piece of chiffon1 a flattering word from a passing lover4 ,so be it4 ,he uses no force4 ,we are still in the ,garden of ,free-,will4 ,and when the ,garden closes down for us1 what then8 ,will chiffon help us8 ,will the smiles of a long-since faithless lover be our strength8 ,now is the time to decide2 but our decision is made in the world1 and by means of the world and not apart from it1 and in the exact circumstances in which we find ourselves4 ,another difficulty we have1 and which forms an insuperable barrier to finding ,god1 is the ever-recurring--we may almost say the continual--secret undercurrent of criticism and hardness towards ,god over what we imagine to be ,his ,will4 ,we need to seek ,god with that which is most like ,him1 with a will which most nearly resembles ,his own4 ,to be in a state of hardness or criticism1 not only for ,god but for any creature1 in even the smallest degree is to be giving allegiance to1 and unifying ourselves with1 that ,will which is opposite to1 furthest away from1 and opposed to ,god4 ,he ,himself is ,ineffable ,tenderness4 ,having once re-found ,god1 the soul frequently cries to ,him in an anguish of pained wonder1 ,how could ,i ever have left ,thee8 ,how could ,i ever have been faithless to ,thine ,unutterable ,perfections8 ,this to the soul remains the mystery of mysteries4 ,was it because of some imperfection left in her of design by ,god in order that ,he might enjoy ,his power to bring her back to ,him8 ,if this were so1 then every single soul must be redeemed--and not for love's sake1 but for ,his ,honour1 ,his own ,holy ,name1 ,his ,perfection4 ,if the soul left ,him because of a deliberate choice1 a preference for imperfection1 a poisonous curiosity of foreign loves1 then love alone is the cause and necessity of our redemption1 and so it feels to be1 for in experience we find that love is the beginning and the middle and the end of all ,his dealings with us4 99 99 99 ,what is our part and what is our righteousness in all this ,process of the ,saviour8 ,this--that we obey1 and that we renounce our own will1 accepting and abiding by the ,will of ,god3 and this self-lending1 self-surrender1 this sacrifice of self-will is counted to us for sufficient righteousness to merit heavenly life4 ,but from first to last we remain conscious that we have no righteousness of our own1 that we are very small and full of weaknesses1 and remain unable to think or say1 ,this is my righteousness1 ,i am righteous1 any more than a man standing bathed in1 or receiving the sunlight can say or think1 ,i am the sun4 ,is all this1 then1 as much as to say that we can sit down and do nothing2 but1 leaving all to ,christ1 we merely believe1 and because of this believing our redemption is accomplished8 ,no1 for we have an active part to play1 a part that ,god never dispenses with--the active keeping of the will in an active state of practical obedience1 submission1 humble uncomplaining endurance through every kind of test4 ,what will these perhaps too much dreaded tests be that ,he will put us through8 ,he will make use of the difficulties1 opportunities1 temptations1 and events of everyday life in the world 7which difficulties we should have to pass through whether we become regenerated or not7 down to the smallest act1 the most secret thought1 the most hidden intention and desire4 ,but through it all it is the ,great ,physician ,himself who cures1 and we are no more able to perform these changes of regeneration in heart and mind than we are able to perform a critical operation on our own body4 ,so ,he takes our vanities and1 one by one1 strews them among the winds1 and we raise no protest2 takes our prides and breaks them in pieces1 and we submit2 takes our self-gratifications and reduces them to dust1 and we stand stripped but patient2 takes the natural lusts of the creature and transfigures them to ,holy ,love4 ,and in all this pain of transition1 what is the ,divine ,anaesthetic that ,he gives us8 ,his ,grace4 ,having submitted to all that ,christ esteems necessary for our regeneration1 what does ,he set us to8 ,service4 ,glad1 happy service to all who may need it4 ,he has wonderful ways of making us acquainted with ,his especial friends1 and it pleases ,him to make us the means of answering the prayers of ,his poor for help1 to their great wonder and joy and to the increase of their faith in ,him4 ,also ,he uses us as a human spark1 to ignite the fires of another man's heart3 when ,he uses us in this way1 it will seem to one like the opening of a window--to another a magnetism4 ,one will see it as a light flashed on dark places1 another receives it as the finding of a track where before was no track4 ,but however many times we may be used in this way1 the working remains a mystery to us4 ,what is our reward whilst still in this world for our patient obediences and renunciations8 ,this--that all becomes well with us the moment the process is brought to the stage where the aim of our life ceases to be the enjoyment of worldly life and becomes fixed upon the ,invisible and upon ,god3 and all this by and because of love1 for it is love alone which can make us genuinely glad to give up our own will and which can keep us from sinning4 ,we commence by qualifying through our human love1 meagre and fluctuating as it is1 for ,god's gift of holy love--of divine reciprocity1 and with the presentation of this divine gift immediately we find ourselves in possession of a new set of desires1 which for the first time in our experience of living prove themselves completely satisfying in fruition4 ,god does not leave us in an arid waste1 because ,he would have us to be holy1 and nowhere are there such ardent desires as in heaven2 but ,he transposes and transfigures the carnal desires into the spiritual by means of this gift of divine reciprocity which is at once access to and union with ,himself4 ,now1 and only now do we find the sting pulled out of every adverse happening and every woe of life1 and out of death also4 ,and the whole process is to be gone through just where and how and as we find ourselves--in our own home or in the home of another1 married or single1 rich or poor1--with these three watchwords1 ,obedience1 ,patience and ,simplicity4 ,but it is not sufficient to have once achieved this union with ,god3 to rest in happiness the soul must continually achieve it4 ,it follows then that our need is not an isolated event but a life1 a life lived with ,god1 and in experience we find that this alone can satisfy us4 ,a life in which we receive hourly the breath of ,his tenderness and pity1 ,his infinite solace to a pardoned soul4 ,of the ,interchange of ,thought without ,sound ,many persons know what it is to have the experience with another person of a simultaneous exactitude of thought--speaking aloud the same words in the same instant4 ,others experience in themselves the power to exchange thought and to know the mind of another without the medium of sound1 though not without the medium of word-forms1 this last being a capacity possessed only by the soul in communion with the ,divine4 ,we name these experiences thought-waves1 mind-reading1 mental telepathy1 and understand very little about them2 but beyond this mind-telepathy there is a telepathy of the soul about which we understand nothing whatever4 ,this is the divine telepathy1 with words or without word-forms1 by which ,christ instructs ,his followers4 ,the telepathy of the mind is the indicator to the existence of a telepathy of the soul2 for the mind indicates to us that which should be sought and known by the soul1 and without we come to divine things first in a creaturely way 7being creatures7 we shall never come to them at all4 ,the mind desires and indicates1 the soul achieves4 ,this telepathy with ,christ is the means by which the soul learns in a direct manner the will and the teaching and the mind of ,christ1 and it is by this means she gains such wisdom as it is ,god's will she shall have4 ,the soul seeks this telepathy during the second stage1 vaguely1 not knowing or understanding the mode of it1 receiving it rarely and with great difficulty4 ,in the third stage she obtains it in abundance1 at times briefly1 at others at great length4 99 99 99 ,that ,god has his dwelling-place at an incalculably great distance from ourselves is a true knowledge of the soul3 but a further knowledge reveals to us that this calamity is mitigated1 and for short periods even annulled1 by provision of ,his within the soul to annihilate this distance1 and be the means of bringing the soul into such immediate contact with ,himself as she is able to endure4 ,but the ,joy-,energy of ,god being insupportable to the very nature of flesh1 in ,his tender love and pity ,he provides us1 through the ,person of ,his ,son1 with degrees of union of such sweet gentleness that we may continually enjoy them through every hour of life2 and through ,his ,son ,he comes out to meet the prodigal while yet afar off4 ,this is strongly observable1 that as the process of ,christ proceeds and grows in us1 though our joys in ,god are individual1 yet they become also clothed in a garment of the universal1 so that the soul1 when she enters the fires of worship and of blessing and of conversing with ,god--without any forethought1 but by a cause or need now become a part of herself1--enters these states and gives to ,him no longer as ,i1 but as ,we--which is to say1 as ,all ,souls4 99 99 99 ,many of us look to death to work a miracle for us1 thinking the mere cessation of physical living will give entry to paradise or even heaven1 so long as we are baptised and call ourselves ,christians4 ,this is a great delusion4 ,in character1 personality1 cleanliness1 goodwill we are1 after death1 exactly as far advanced as we were before death1 and no further4 ,what then is needed1 since death will not help us8 ,the ,seed of ,divine love and life planted and consciously growing in us whilst we are still in this world4 ,and what is this ,seed8--the ,redeemer4 99 99 99 ,what is paradise1 what is heaven8 ,the progressive gradations of conditions of a perfect reciprocity of love1 and the greater the perfection of this reciprocity the greater the altitudes attained of heaven4 ,thus we see in ,scripture that the angels who stand nearest to ,god or highest in heaven are the cherubim--that is to say1 they are those who have attained a greater reciprocity than all other angels4 ,now this ,divine love is incomprehensible to us until we are initiated into its mystery as a gift1 and cannot be understood nor guessed at by comparisons with any human loves however great1 noble1 or pure2 but this burning fiery essence of joy1 this radiant glory of delight1 this holy and ineffable fulfilment of the uttermost needs1 longings1 and requirements of the soul must be personally experienced by us to be comprehended4 ,what madness in us is it that can count as an added cross or burden any means by which we reach such perfection of bliss for ever8 ,the ,cross is for us the misery of our own blinding sins and selfishnesses4 ,the burden is the weight of our own distance from ,god4 ,take up thy cross 7which is our daily life of ignorance and sin71 take up thy cross1 and follow ,me1 says the voice of the ,saviour2 and as we do it and follow ,him the distance between ,god and ourselves diminishes1 and finally the burden and the cross disappear1 and behold ,god6 awaiting us with ,his consolations4 ,it is the stopping half-way that causes would-be followers of ,christ such distress4 ,it is necessary that we follow ,him all the way and not merely a part of it--that ,he may complete ,his process in us4 ,when we are living altogether in a creaturely1 natural1 or unregenerated way1 absorbed in the ambitions and interests of a worldly life1 we are perhaps content4 ,when we live regenerated and in the spirit1 we are in great joy2 but when we try to live between the two and would serve ,god and worldly interests at the same time we are in gloomy wretchedness1 vacillation1 depression4 ,the ,master said1 ,the kingdom of heaven is within you1 which signified that within us was the potentiality to have entrance to1 and to know1 the mystery of the ,divine ,secret1 and to participate whilst still living here1 in the early degrees or manifestations of ,divine ,love--that ,power which glorifies the angels1 and is ,heaven4 ,of the three ,stages of ,god-,consciousness 7,which more properly expressed is the gift of immediate access of the soul of ,god7 ,there are three principal stages on the way of progress--three separate degrees of ,god-,consciousness4 ,the first is the ,consciousness of the ,presence of ,jesus1 the ,perfect ,man4 ,we take ,him into the heart1 accept and know ,him1 love and obey ,him4 ,in the second stage we receive ,jesus as the ,christ and recognise ,him as the ,messiah 7of which the mind was not sure in the first stage74 ,we rejoice in ,him1 giving ,him a more perfect obedience4 ,in the third the soul is given the ,consciousness of the ,father1 and1 being filled with a very great love and joy1 worships ,him as the ,known ,god4 ,now life immediately becomes totally changed1 fear and sin are swept away1 and love rules the ,universe4 ,it is now that ,god makes us know ,his glamour2 that ,he casts over the soul ,his golden net of spiritual delights1 and by them seems to challenge her1 saying to the soul1 ,now that ,i reveal ,myself to thee1 canst thou ever return to the joys of the world1 canst thou find its pleasures sweet1 canst thou be satisfied with any human love2 canst thou by any means resist ,me now that ,i show ,myself8 ,and the soul answers ,him1 ,nay ,lord1 in truth ,i cannot4 ,the remembrance of these powers and these spells of ,god make for the soul a sure foundation of repose and certainty in the days of the testing of fidelity that still lie before her3 they also further reveal to her ,his consummate care of her exact requirements1 for she cannot pass beyond a certain stage without a direct personal assurance is given her4 ,first ,he demands of us that we have1 and actively maintain1 a clean will to turn and cleave to ,him1 without any assurance beyond written assurance 7,scripture72 and having given ,him a thorough proof of fidelity1 ,he then grants us the personal assurance4 ,having been given these rapturous concessions1 what would perfection demand of us--a total withdrawal from the world--a hiding away in secret with our soul's treasure of delights8 ,maybe for some2 but a higher perfection calls us back to service in the wretched turmoil of the world1 to work and to stand in the ,house of ,rimmon and never bow the knee1 to carry with us everywhere the ,divine ,consciousness and preserve its light undimmed in every sordid petty circumstance of daily life1 to endure with perfect patience the follies and the prides of the unenlightened4 ,whoever can achieve those things may find himself at last a saint4 ,very early in this third stage a miracle is performed in us3 without knowing how it came about or what day it was done1 we suddenly know that the heart and the mind have become virgin--and this without any variation4 ,every kind of lust1 whether of eye1 body1 heart1 or mind1 has been removed from us1 and never again has any power over us1 for the will has become superior to lust1 and there is a finish to all such contending3 this moral healing is more impressive than any physical healing4 ,before this miracle is performed for us1 we have suffered many things1 as much as we can bear3 subtle and astonishing temptations of mind and body and spirit call to remembrance the former days in which after ye were illuminated ye endured a great fight of afflictions 7,heb4 x4 #cb74 ,this person that writes formerly supposed that no creature was admitted to the blessedness of being in any way with ,god in ,spirit without they were already become a saint2 but this is not so1 and ,he accepts the sinner long before he is a saint 7if ever we become one in this world1 which is doubtful71 provided the will is always held good towards ,god4 ,this is the mighty ,process of ,christ which he desires to perform for all4 ,of the tears we shed over it the less mention the better2 they are precious tears1 necessary tears1 cleansing tears1 and if we will not lend ourselves to this ,process of ,christ we may have as many tears for our portion and no benefit from them in the way of advancement4 ,let us weep the tears that ,god ,himself will wipe away4 ,so then in the first stage the ,soul tastes of the sweet companionship of ,jesus4 ,in the second1 of the might and graciousness of ,christ2 in the third1 of the fullness of ,god and ,his unspeakable delights4 ,thou shalt give them to drink of ,thy pleasures1 as out of the river 7,psalm xxxvi474 ,in the third stage of ,god-,consciousness a great change takes place in our relationship to ,god4 ,besides the magnitude of the alterations of the inner life--the sweeping spiritual changes--the body also shares in a change1 for1 whilst we formerly prayed to ,god with a bowed head and a hidden face1 we now become unable to pray or approach ,him except with a raised head and an uncovered face4 ,this change is not from any thought or intention of our own1 but we are forced to it by a sweet necessity4 ,in a company of persons praying1 all those in the third stage could be immediately known by this necessity of the raised and bared face if we were not taught by the ,holy ,spirit never to reveal to others that we are in the third stage except in special instances4 ,for this reason it is not possible to enter true communion with ,god in a public place of worship unless we can conceal ourselves from others4 ,for the face undergoes a change in communion with ,god1 and it is not pleasing to ,him that this should be seen by any eye but ,his own4 ,if anyone finds great difficulty 7and the most of us do7 in coming to the first stage--that of taking ,jesus into the heart--he must pray every day in a few short words from the heart that ,god will give him to ,jesus1 and in due time he will be heard4 ,in the third stage of progress we have the home-coming of the soul as far as we are able to know it in the flesh3 ,we taste of the powers of ,god 7,hebrews74 ,but the fullness of home-coming is reserved for that day in which the greatest of all the mysteries will be revealed to us--the mystery of the ,relation of the ,soul to ,god4 ,in that great day we shall know ,god by ,his ,own ,name4 99 99 99 ,we do not find ,god by denying the existence of things not pleasing to ,him4 ,we do not find the ,eternal ,goodness by saying that ,evil does not exist4 ,we do not find true health of spirit because we deny all sickness1 pain1 and disease4 ,such a mode of ,christianity may give a sense of comfort1 lend a false security to the heart and mind at once weary of ,god-searching1 and disenchanted with the world2 but it is not the ,christianity which regenerates4 ,it is a narcotic1 not a ,redemption4 ,it is the way of a mind unwilling to face truths because they pain4 ,if there was anything made plain by ,christ it is that the way of ,redemption lies through heroism and not cowardice4 ,let those of us who too much fear a passing pain of sacrifice of will remember that the deepest of all pains1 the last word in the tragedy of life1 is to come to old age and descend to the grave without having found the ,saviour4 ,for our calamity is that we are lost souls4 ,our opportunity is that in this world we find the track of ,christ which leads us home4 99 99 99 ,god does not create a new world on purpose for ,his lovers immediately to live in1 yet though we remain our full time in this same world it is not the same world4 ,we see a person in a severe illness and again in full health4 ,it is the same person1 and not the same person4 ,we see a garden filled with flowers in the rain under grey clouds1 and again the same garden filled with mellow sunlight under blue skies2 it is the same garden1 and not the same garden4 ,these changes could never be described or conveyed to the man blind from birth2 neither can spiritual changes be described or conveyed till we ourselves gain similarity of experience4 ,god transposes our pleasures1 taking the glamour from the guilty and transferring it to the blameless2 by this transforming our lives4 ,he increases the pleasure of unworldly enjoyments so we are independent of the worldly ones4 ,but we cannot remain in this transformed world of ,his unless we are at peace both with ourself and all persons around us4 ,though from earliest childhood we may have found in the beauties of ,nature a great delight1 when we become the lover of ,god ,he passes ,his fingers over our hearts and our eyes and opens them to marvellous new powers for joy4 ,oh1 the ecstasy that may be known in one short walk alone with ,god6 ,the overflowing heart cries out to ,him1 ,what other lover is there can give such bliss as this1 and what is all ,nature but a lovely language between ,thee and me6 ,then the soul spreads wings into the blue and sings to ,him like soaring lark4 ,but do not let us seek ,him only because of ,his ,delights1 for so we might miss ,him altogether4 ,but let it be because it is ,his wish3 because ,perfection calls1 and mystery calls to mystery1 and love to love1 and ,light calls to the darkness and the ,dawn is born4 ,the glamour of ,god is come down about my soul1 ,and ,he who made all loveliness has decked my heart in spring1 ,and garlanded me round about with tender buds ,of flowers and scented things1 and love and light4 ,i see no rain1 no sad grey skies1 ,for the glamour of ,god has come down about mine eyes1 ,and the ,voice of the ,maker of all loveliness ,calling to my soul1 leads me enchanted ,up the glittering mysteries of ,infinity4 ------ ,transcriber's notes3 ,the name of the author1 ,lilian ,staveley1 is not mentioned on the title page of this text1 but ,i have added it here4 ,also ,i have made two spelling changes3 subsitute another picture to substitute another picture accepts the sinner long long before he is a saint to accepts the sinner long before he is a saint4