,,the ,,young ,,man',s ,,guide4 by ,,wm4 ,a4 ,,alcott4 ,twelfth ,edition4 ,boston3 ,perkins and ,marvin4 #ahch4 ,entered1 according to act of ,congress1 in the year #ahce1 ,by ,perkins ,marvin1 in the ,clerk's ,office of the ,district ,court of the ,district of ,massachusetts4 ,,to ,,the ,,reader4 ,when ,i commenced this work1 my object was a mere compilation4 ,there were many excellent books for young men1 already in circulation1 but none which ,i thought unexceptionable2 and some of them contained sentiments which ,i could not approve4 ,i sat down1 therefore1 intending to make selections from the choicest parts of them all1 and prepare an unexceptionable and practical manual2 such an one as ,i should be willing to see in the hands of any youth in the community4 ,in the progress of my task1 however1 ,i found much less that was wholly in accordance with my own sentiments1 than ,i had expected4 ,the result was that the project of compiling1 was given up2 and a work prepared1 which is chiefly original4 ,there are1 it is true1 some quotations from ',burgh's ,dignity of ,human ,nature1' ',cobbett's ,advice to ,young ,men1' ',chesterfield's ,advice1' and ,hawes' ,lectures2 but in general what ,i have derived from other works is re-written1 and much modified4 ,on this account it was thought unnecessary to refer to authorities in the body of the work4 ,the object of this book is to elevate and reform4 ,that it may prove useful and acceptable1 as a means to these ends1 is the hearty wish of ,,the ,,author ,boston1 ,dec4 #i1 #ahcc4 ,,advertisement ,,to ,,the ,,first ,,edition4 ,the great purpose of the ,young ,man's ,guide1 is the formation of such character in our young men as shall render them the worthy and useful and happy members of a great republic4 ,to this end1 the author enters largely into the means of improving the mind1 the manners and the morals2--as well as the proper management of business4 ,something is also said on amusements1 and bad habits4 ,on the subject of marriage he has1 however1 been rather more full than elsewhere4 ,the importance of this institution to every young man1 the means of rendering it what the ,creator intended1 together with those incidental evils which either accompany or follow--some of them in terrible retribution--the vices which tend to oppose ,his benevolent purposes1 are faithfully presented1 and claim the special attention of every youthful reader4 99 99 99 99 99 ,,advertisement ,,to ,,the ,,second ,,edition4 ,the rapid sale of a large edition of this work1 and the general tribute of public praise which has been awarded to its merits1 instead of closing the eyes of the ,publishers or the ,author against existing defects1 have1 on the contrary1 only deepened their sense of obligation to render the present edition as perfect as possible2 and no pains have been spared to accomplish this end4 ,several new sections have been added to the work1 and some of the former have been abridged or extended4 99 99 99 99 99 ,,advertisement ,,to ,,the ,,third ,,edition4 ,an increasing demand for the ,young ,man's ,guide1 evinced by the sale of more than five thousand copies of the work in a few months1 have induced the publishers to give a third edition1 with some amendments and additions by the author2 who has also derived important suggestions from gentlemen of high literary and moral standing1 to whom the work had been submitted for examination4 ,,the ,,publishers4 ,,contents4 ,,introduction4 ,mistakes in regard to the disposition and management of the young4 #ai-bf ,,chapter ,i4--,,importance ,,of ,,aiming ,,high ,,in ,,the ,,formation ,,of ,,character4 ,section ,i4 ,importance of having a high standard of action4--,the young should determine to rise4 ,we may usually become what we desire to be4 ,an anecdote4 ,studying the lives of eminent and useful men4 #bg-cj ,section ,,ii4 ,motives to action4--,a regard to our own happiness4 ,to family and friends4 ,to society4 ,to country4 ,to the will of ,god4 ,the love of ,god1 the highest motive4 #ca-ch ,section ,,iii4 ,industry4--,no person has a right to live without labor4 ,determine to labor as long as you live4 ,mistaken method of teaching industry4 ,labor in the open air4 ,manual labor schools4 #ch-dc ,section ,,iv4 ,economy4--,false and true2 ,examples of the false4 ,time is money4 ,sixty minutes shown to be an hour4 ,economical habits4 #a4 ,do every thing at the time4 ,anecdote4 #b4 ,every thing should have its place4 ,examples4 #dc-dg ,section ,v4 ,indolence4--,the indolent only half human4 ,characteristics of an indolent man4 ,his epitaph4 #dg-di ,section ,,vi4 ,early ,rising and rest4--,he who would rise early1 must retire early4 ,morning air4 ,advantages of early rising4 #a4 ,things go better through the day4 #b4 ,morning hours more agreeable4 #c4 ,danger of the second nap4 #d4 ,early risers long-lived4 #e4 ,one hour's sleep before midnight worth two after4 #f4 ,saving of time and money4 ,estimates4 ,examples of early rising4 #di-ee ,section ,,vii4 ,duty to ,parents4--,reasons4 #a4 ,for the sake of our own reputation4 #b4 ,from love to our parents4 #c4 ,better to suffer wrong1 than to do wrong4 #d4 ,nothing gained by going away4 ,franklin an exception to the general rule4 ,no sight more beautiful than a well ordered and happy family4 ,obedience the great lesson of life4 #ef-ei ,section ,,viii4 ,faithfulness4--,our duty to our employers4 ,common error of the young4 ,examples4 ,the ,mahratta prince4 #ei-fa ,section ,,ix4 ,on ,forming ,temperate ,habits4--,drunkenness and gluttony4 ,indulgence short of these ,indulgences very expensive4 ,spending time at meals4 ,water drinkers the best guests4 ,temperate habits tend to health4 ,ecclesiasticus4 ,examples of rational living4 ,tea1 coffee1 soups1 and all warm drinks injurious4 ,general rules4 #fb-gj ,section ,x4 ,suppers4--,customs of our ancestors2 and of the ,jews4 ,advantages gained by avoiding suppers4 ,eating-houses4 #gj-gc ,section ,,xi4 ,dress4--,its uses4 ,neither be first nor last in a fashion4 ,fondness for dress4 ,women not often misled by dress4 #gc-ge ,section ,,xii4 ,bashfulness and ,modesty4--,we may be both bashful and impudent4 ,bashfulness injurious4 ,set up for just what we are1 and no more4 #gf-gh ,section ,,xiii4 ,politeness and ,good ,breeding4--,not to be despised4 ,in what good breeding consists4 ,how acquired4 ,ten plain rules4 #gh-hb ,section ,,xiv4 ,personal ,habits4--,business of the day planned in the morning4 ,dressing1 shaving1 c4 ,shaving with cold water4 ,anecdote4 #hb-hh ,section ,,xv4 ,bathing and ,cleanliness4--,connection of ,cleanliness with ,moral ,purity4 ,neglect of this subject4 #hh-hi ,section ,,xvi4 ,little ,things4--,not to be disregarded4 ,zimmerman4 ,the world made up of little things4 #hi-ic ,section ,,xvii4 ,anger1 and the means of restraining it4 ,avoid the first steps4 ,an error in education4 ,opinion of ,dr4 ,darwin4 ,the ,quaker and the ,merchant4 ,zimmerman's method of overcoming anger4 ,unreasonableness of returning evil for evil4 #ic-ii ,,chapter ,,ii4--,,on ,,the ,,management ,,of ,,business4 ,section ,i4 ,commencing ,business4--,avoid debt4 ,do not begin too early4 ,facts stated4 ,why young men do not take warning4 ,students of ,medicine and ,divinity4 ,examples for imitation4 #ajj-ajh ,section ,,ii4 ,importance of ,integrity4--,thieves and robbers respect it4 ,what it is4 ,many kinds of dishonesty4 #a4 ,concealing the market price4 #b4 ,misrepresenting it4 #c4 ,selling unsound or defective goods1 and calling them sound and perfect4 ,quack medicines4 #d4 ,concealing defects4 #e4 ,lowering the value of things we wish to buy4 #f4 ,use of false weights and measures4 ,other kinds of dishonesty4 #ajh-aae ,section ,,iii4 ,method4--,memorandum book2 its uses4 ,rules for doing much business in little time4 #aaf-aag ,section ,,iv4 ,application to ,business4--,every person ought to have one principal object of pursuit1 and steadily pursue it4 ,perseverance of a shopkeeper4 ,all useful employments respectable4 ,character of a drone4 #aag-abj ,section ,v4 ,proper ,time and ,season of doing ,business4--,when to deal with the gloomy2 the intemperate2 those unhappy in domestic life2 men involved in public concerns4 #abj-abb ,section ,,vi4 ,buying upon ,trust4--,live within our income4 ,calculate4 ,buy nothing but what you need4 ,estimates and examples to show the folly of credit4 ,not intended as lessons of stinginess4 #abb-abg ,section ,,vii4 ,we should endeavor to do our business ourselves4 ,four reasons4 ,trusting dependants4 ,we can do many little things without hindrance4 #abg-acj ,section ,,viii4 ,over ,trading4--,a species of fraud4 ,arises from a desire to get rich rapidly4 ,wickedness of monopolies4 #acj-aca ,section ,,ix4 ,making contracts beforehand4 ,always make bargains beforehand4 ,three reasons4 ,if possible1 reduce every thing to writing4 #aca-acb ,section ,x4 ,how to know with whom to deal4--,two rules4 ,how to detect a knave4 ,all men by nature1 avaricious4 ,avoid those who boast of good bargains4 ,avoid sanguine promisers4 #acc-ace ,section ,,xi4 ,how to take ,men as they are4--,how to regard a miser2 a passionate man2 a slow man2 the covetous2 those ruled by their wives2 the boasting2 the mild tempered2 the bully4 ,six sorts of people from whom you are not to expect much aid or sympathy in life3 the sordid1 the lazy1 the busy1 the rich1 those miserable from poverty1 and the silly4 #acf-adj ,section ,,xii4 ,of desiring the good opinion of others4--,those not far from ruin who don't care4--,the other extreme to be avoided4 #adj-ada ,section ,,xiii4 ,intermeddling with the affairs of others4--,matchmakers4 ,taking sides in quarrels4 ,ishmaelites4 #adb-adc ,section ,,xiv4 ,on keeping ,secrets4--,who may safely be trusted4 ,anecdotes4 #adc-ade ,section ,,xv4 ,fear of ,poverty4--,little real poverty in this country4 ,shame of being thought poor leads to worse evils than poverty itself4 ,fear of poverty often a cause of suicide4 #ade-aej ,section ,,xvi4 ,speculation4--,the habit early formed4 ,it is a species of gaming4 ,its sources4 #aej-aeb ,section ,,xvii4 ,lawsuits4--,avoid the law4 ,litigiousness1 a disease4 ,consider what is gained by it4 ,examples of loss4 ,subdue the passions which lead to it4 ,lawsuits unnecessary4 #aeb-aef ,section ,,xviii4 ,hard dealing4--,its unchristian nature4 ,two prices4 ,habits of the ,mohammedans4 #aef-aeg ,,chapter ,,iii4--,,on ,,amusements ,,and ,,indulgences4 ,section ,i4 ,on ,gaming4--,every gambler a robber4 ,the first player4 ,gaming produces nothing4 ,corrupts manners4 ,discourages industry4 ,opinions of ,locke and others4 ,what tremendous evils it leads to4 ,france1 ,england4 ,different sorts of gaming4 #a4 ,cards1 dice1 and billiards4 #b4 ,shooting matches4 ,these brutal practices still sometimes tolerated4 #c4 ,horse racing and cock fighting4 ,a recent bull fight4 #aeh-aga ,section ,,ii4 ,on ,lotteries4--,lotteries the worst species of ,gaming4 ,they are a species of swindling4 ,estimates to show their folly4 ,appeal to the reader4 #aga-agf ,section ,,iii4 ,the ,theatre4--,a school of vice4 ,injurious to health4 ,diseases produced by it4 ,its danger to morals4 ,opinions and facts from ,griscom1 ,rousseau1 ,hawkins1 ,tillotson1 ,collier1 ,hale1 ,burgh1 and ,plato4 ,anecdote4 ,antiquity of theatres4 ,no safety but in total abstinence4 #agf-ahc ,section ,,iv4 ,use of ,tobacco4--#a4 ,smoking4 ,picture of its evils in ,germany4 ,tobacco consumed in the ,united ,states4 ,when it was introduced4 ,none recommend it to their children4 ,a most powerful poison4 ,savages fond of it1 in proportion to their degradation4 ,no poisonous plant1 so much used1 except the betel of ,india4 ,how smoking can be abolished4 #b4 ,chewing4 ,apologies for the practice4 ,tobacco does not preserve teeth4 #c4 ,taking snuff4 ,disgust and danger of this habit4 #ahc-aia ,section ,v4 ,useful ,recreations4--,recreations in the open air4 ,playing ball2 quoits2 nine pins1 c4 ,skating4 ,dancing4 ,its uses and dangers4 ,reading sometimes a recreation4 ,sports of the field considered4 #aia-aid ,,chapter ,,iv4--,,improvement ,,of ,,the ,,mind4 ,section ,i4 ,habits of ,observation4--,we should keep our 'eyes open4' ,anecdote from ,dr4 ,dwight4 ,avoid pedantry4 ,anecdote of a surgeon2--of the elder and younger ,pliny4 #aie-aii ,section ,,ii4 ,rules for ,conversation4--,rules of profiting from it4 ,hear others4 ,do not interrupt them4 ,avoid those who use vulgar or profane language4 ,speak late yourself4 ,avoid great earnestness4 ,never be overbearing4 #aii-bjb ,section ,,iii4 ,on ,books and ,study4--,how to overcome a dislike to them4 ,lyceums1 ,travels1 ,histories1 ,newspapers4 ,a common mistake4 ,education only the key to knowledge4 ,men have commenced students at #dj4 ,franklin always a learner4 ,we can find time for study4 ,practical ,studies4 #a4 ,geography4 ,how to study it4 ,its importance4 #b4 ,history4 ,how pursued4 #c4 ,arithmetic4 ,practical arithmeticians4 ,the mere use of the pen and pencil do not give a knowledge of this branch4 #d4 ,chemistry1 and other ,natural ,sciences4 ,usefulness of ,chemistry4 #e4 ,grammar and ,composition4 ,one method of obtaining a practical knowledge of these branches4 #f4 ,letter writing4 #g4 ,voyages1 travels1 and biography4 #h4 ,novels4 ,not recommended1 especially to those who have little leisure4 #i4 ,newspapers4 ,newspapers1 though productive of much evil1 on the whole useful4 ,five rules to assist the reader in making a judicious selection4 ,politics4 ,history and constitution of our country studied4 #aj4 ,keeping a ,journal4 ,examples4 ,other ways of improving the mind4 ,blank book1 with pencil in our pockets4 #aa4 ,preservation of ,books and ,papers4 ,books should be covered2 kept clean2 used with dry hands4 ,turning down leaves4 ,using books for pillows1 props to windows1 seats1 c4 #bjb-bbi ,,chapter ,v4--,,social ,,and ,,moral ,,improvement4 ,section ,i4 ,female ,society1 in general4--,both sexes should be educated together4 ,what we are to think of those who despise female society4 ,how it polishes and improves us4 #bcj-bcd ,section ,,ii4 ,advice and ,friendship of ,mothers4 #bcd-bce ,section ,,iii4 ,society of ,sisters--,attentions due them4 ,their benefit4 #bcf-bcg ,section ,,iv4 ,general ,remarks and ,advice4--,too great intimacy4 ,avoid trifling4 ,beware of idolatry4 #bch-bda ,section ,v4 ,lyceums and other ,social ,meetings4--,value of ,lyceums1 and courses of lectures4 ,how they might be improved4 ,their cheapness4 #bda-bdc ,section ,,vi4 ,moral ,instruction4--,sabbath ,schools and ,bible ,classes4 ,value of the latter4 #bdc-bdd ,section ,,vii4 ,of ,female ,society in reference to ,marriage4--,every youth should keep matrimony in view4 ,particular advice4 ,the wish to marry1 prudently indulged1 will have a great influence on our character4 ,error of a pedagogue4 #bdd-bej ,,chapter ,,vi4--,,marriage4 ,section ,i4 ,why ,matrimony is a duty4--,importance of the subject4 ,considered as a school4 ,early marriage4 ,objections4 ,seven great evils from late marriages4 #bea-beh ,section ,,ii4 ,general ,considerations4--,husbands and wives gradually resemble each other4 ,considerations for those who embark in matrimony4 #beh-bfb ,section ,,iii4 ,female ,qualifications for ,matrimony4--#a4 ,moral ,excellence4 #b4 ,common ,sense4 #c4 ,desire for improvement4 #d4 ,fondness for children4 ,miserable condition of a husband or wife1 where this is wanting4 #e4 ,love of domestic concerns4 ,evils of ignorance on this point4 ,fashionable education in fault4 #f4 ,sobriety4 ,definition of the term4 ,an anecdote4 ,love of mental and bodily excitement usually connected4 #g4 ,industry4 ,how to judge whether a person is industrious4 #h4 ,early rising4 ,a mark of industry4 ,late rising difficult of cure4 #i4 ,frugality4 ,its importance shown4 #aj4 ,personal ,neatness4 ,its comforts4 #aa4 ,a good temper4 ,its importance illustrated4 #ab4 ,accomplishments4 #bfc-cje ,,chapter ,,vii4--,,criminal ,,behavior4 ,section ,i4 ,inconstancy and ,seduction4--,constancy4 ,its importance illustrated by an example4 ,cruelty of sporting with the affections of a female4 ,opinion of ,burgh4 #cjf-cac ,section ,,ii4 ,licentiousness4--,most common in cities4 ,new ,orleans4 ,hint to legislators4 ,a horrid picture4 ,not wholly imaginary4 ,avoid the first erring step4 ,example of premature decrepitude4 ,anecdote of ,c4 ,s4 ,solitary vice4 ,this vice compared with intemperance4 ,a set of wretches exposed4 ,apologies sometimes made4 ,nature of the evils this error produces4 ,the law of ,god4 ,medical testimony4 ,entire celibacy1 or purity1 not unfavorable to health4 ,youth ought to consider this1 and study the human frame4 ,causes of the error in question4 #a4 ,false delicacy4 ,our half ,mohammedan education4 #b4 ,books1 ,pictures1 c4 ,great extent of this evil4 ,opinion of ,dr4 ,dwight4 #c4 ,obscene and improper songs4 ,anecdote of a schoolmaster4 #d4 ,double entendres4 ,parental errors4 ,evening ,parties4 #cad-ccg ,section ,,iii4 ,diseases of ,licentiousness4 ,nine or ten of them enumerated4 ,the ninth described4 ,four examples of suffering4 ,when the young ought to tremble4 ,happiness of having never erred4 ,what books may be safely and usefully consulted4 ,extract from ,rees' ,cyclopedia4 ,other forms of disease4 ,of excess4 ,all degrees of vice are excessive4 ,duties of ,parents as guides to the young4 ,obligations of ,medical men4 ,concluding ,remarks4 #ccg-ced ,,additional ,,chapter4 ,section ,i4 ,choice of ,friends4 ,importance of a few female friends4 ,caution necessary in making a choice4 ,story of ,lucius--his mistake4 ,reflections4 ,character of friends4 ,select a small number only4 ,section ,,ii4 ,rudeness of manners4 ,wearing hats in the house--its tendency4 ,practical questions4 ,manners in families4 ,section ,,iii4 ,self-praise4 ,egotism4 ,we should say little about ourselves4 ,,introduction4 ,the young are often accused of being thoughtless1 rash1 and unwilling to be advised4 ,that the former of these charges is in a great measure just1 is not denied4 ,indeed1 what else could be expected8 ,they are thoughtless1 for they are yet almost strangers to the world1 and its cares and perplexities4 ,they are forward1 and sometimes rash2 but this generally arises from that buoyancy of spirits1 which health and vigor impart4 ,true1 it is to be corrected1 let the cause be what it may2 but we shall correct with more caution1 and probably with greater success1 when we understand its origin4 ,that youth are unwilling to be advised1 as a general rule1 appears to me untrue4 ,at least ,i have not found it so4 ,when the feeling does exist1 ,i believe it often arises from parental mismanagement1 or from an unfortunate method of advising4 ,the infant seeks to grasp the burning lamp2--the parent endeavors to dissuade him from it4 ,at length he grasps it1 and suffers the consequences4 ,finally1 however1 if the parent manages him properly1 he learns to follow his advice1 and obey his indications1 in order to avoid pain4 ,such1 at least1 is the natural result of rational management4 ,and the habit of seeking parental counsel1 once formed1 is not easily eradicated4 ,it is true that temptation and forgetfulness may lead some of the young occasionally to grasp the lamp1 even after they are told better2 but the consequent suffering generally restores them to their reason4 ,it is only when the parent neglects or refuses to give advice1 and for a long time manifests little or no sympathy with his child1 that the habit of filial reliance and confidence is destroyed4 ,in fact there are very few children indeed1 however improperly managed1 who do not in early life acquire a degree of this confiding1 inquiring1 counsel-seeking disposition4 ,most persons1 as they grow old1 forget that they have ever been young themselves4 ,this greatly disqualifies them for social enjoyment4 ,it was wisely said2 ',he who would pass the latter part of his life with honor and decency1 must1 when he is young1 consider that he shall one day be old1 and when he is old1 remember that he has once been young4' ,but if forgetfulness on this point disqualifies a person for self enjoyment1 how much more for that which is social8 ,still more does it disqualify us for giving advice4 ,while a lad1 ,i was at play1 one day1 with my mates1 when two gentlemen observing us1 one of them said to the other2 ',do you think you ever acted as foolishly as those boys do8' ',why yes2 ,i suppose ,i did2' was the reply4 ',well1' said the other1 ',i never did2--,i know ,i never did4' ,both of these persons has the name of parent1 but he who could not believe he had ever acted like a child himself1 is greatly destitute of the proper parental spirit4 ,he never--or scarcely ever--puts himself to the slightest inconvenience to promote1 directly1 the happiness of the young1 even for half an hour4 ,he supposes every child ought to be grave1 like himself4 ,if he sees the young engaged in any of those exercises which are really adapted to their years1 he regards it as an entire loss of time1 besides being foolish and unreasonable4 ,he would have them at work1 or at their studies4 ,whereas there is scarcely any thing that should give a parent more pleasure than to see his children1 in their earliest years1 enjoying that flow of spirits1 which leads them forth to active1 vigorous1 blood-stirring sports4 ,of all persons living1 he who does not remember that he has once been young1 is the most completely disqualified for giving youthful counsel4 ,he obtrudes his advice occasionally1 when the youth is already under temptation1 and borne along with the force of a vicious current2 but because he disregards it1 he gives him up as heedless1 perhaps as obstinate4 ,if advice is afterwards asked1 his manners are cold and repulsive4 ,or perhaps he frowns him away1 telling him he never follows his advice1 and therefore it is useless to give it4 ,so common is it to treat the young with a measure of this species of roughness1 that ,i cannot wonder the maxim has obtained that the young1 generally1 'despise counsel4' ,and yet1 ,i am fully convinced1 no maxim is farther from the truth4 ,when we come to the very close of life1 we cannot transfer1 in a single moment1 that knowledge of the world and of human nature which an experience of #gj years has afforded us4 ,if1 therefore1 from any cause whatever1 we have not already dealt it out to those around us1 it is likely to be lost2--and lost for ever4 ,now is it not a pity that what the young would regard as an invaluable treasure1 could they come at it in such a manner1 and at such seasons1 as would be agreeable to them1 and that1 too1 which the old are naturally so fond of distributing1 should be buried with their bodies8 ,let me counsel the young1 then1 to do every thing they can1 consistently with the rules of good breeding1 to draw forth from the old the treasures of which ,i have been speaking4 ,let them even make some sacrifice of that buoyant feeling which1 at their age1 is so apt to predominate4 ,let them conform1 for the time1 in some measure1 to the gravity of the aged1 in order to gain their favor1 and secure their friendship and confidence4 ,i do not ask them wholly to forsake society1 or their youthful pastimes for this purpose1 or to become grave habitually2 for this would be requiring too much4 ,but there are moments when old people1 however disgusted they may be with the young1 do so far unbend themselves as to enter into cheerful and instructive conversation4 ,i can truly say that when a boy1 some of my happiest hours were spent in the society of the aged--those too1 who were not always what they should have been4 ,the old live in the past1 as truly as the young do in the future4 ,nothing more delights them than to relate stories of 'olden time1' especially when themselves were the heroes4 ,but they will not relate them1 unless there is somebody to hear4 ,let the young avail themselves of this propensity1 and make the most of it4 ,some may have been heroes in war2 some in travelling the country2 others in hunting1 fishing1 agriculture or the mechanic arts2 and it may be that here and there one will boast of his skill1 and relate stories of his success in that noblest of arts and employments--the making of his fellow creatures wise1 and good1 and happy4 ,in conversation with all these persons1 you will doubtless hear much that is uninteresting4 ,but where will you find any thing pure or perfect below the sun8 ,the richest ores contain dross4 ,at the same time you cannot fail1 unless the fault is your own1 to learn many valuable things from them all4 ,from war stories1 you will learn history2 from accounts of travels1 geography1 human character1 manners and customs2 and from stories of the good or ill treatment which may have been experienced1 you will learn how to secure the one1 and avoid the other4 ,from one person you will learn one thing2 from another something else4 ,put these shreds together1 and in time you will form quite a number of pages in the great book of human nature4 ,you may thus1 in a certain sense1 live several lives in one4 ,one thing more is to be remembered4 ,the more you have1 the more you are bound to give4 ,common sense1 as well as the ,scripture1 says1 ',it is more blessed to give than to receive4' ,remember that as you advance in years you are bound to avoid falling into the very errors which1 'out of your own mouth' you have 'condemned' in those who have gone before you2 and to make yourselves as acceptable as you can to the young1 in order to secure their confidence1 and impart to them1 little by little1 those accumulated treasures of experience which you have acquired in going through life1 but which must otherwise1 to a very great extent1 be buried with you in your graves4 ,but1 my young friends1 there is one method besides conversation1 in which you may come at the wisdom of the aged2 and that is through the medium of books4 ,many old persons have written well1 and you cannot do better than to avail yourselves of their instructions4 ,this method has even one advantage over conversation4 ,in the perusal of a book1 you are not so often prejudiced or disgusted by the repulsive and perhaps chilling manner of him who wrote it1 as you might have been from his conversation and company4 ,i cannot but indulge the hope that you will find some valuable information and useful advice in this little book4 ,it has cost me much labor to embody1 in so small a compass1 the results of my own experience on such a variety of subjects1 and to arrange my thoughts in such a manner as seemed to me most likely to arrest and secure your attention4 ,the work1 however1 is not wholly the result of my own experience1 for ,i have derived many valuable thoughts from other writers4 ,an introductory chapter or preface is usually rather dry1 but if this should prove sufficiently interesting to deserve your attention till you have read it1 and the table of contents1 thoroughly1 ,i have strong hopes that you will read the rest of the book4 ,and in accordance with my own principles1 ,i believe you will try to follow my advice2 for ,i take it for granted that none will purchase and read this work but such as are willing to be advised4 ,i repeat it1 therefore--,i go upon the presumption that my advice will1 in the main1 be followed4 ,not at every moment of your lives1 it is true2 for you will be exposed on all sides to temptation1 and1 ,i fear1 sometimes fall4 ,but when you come to review the chapter 7for ,i hope ,i have written nothing but what is worth a second reading7 which contains directions on that particular subject wherein you have failed1 and find1 too1 how much you have suffered by neglecting counsel1 and rashly seizing the lamp1 ,i am persuaded you will not soon fall again in that particular direction4 ,in this view1 ,i submit these pages to the youth of our ,american ,states4 ,if the work should not please them1 ,i shall be so far from attributing it to any fault or perversity of theirs1 that ,i shall at once conclude ,i have not taken a wise and proper method of presenting my instructions4 ,,the ,,young ,,man',s ,,guide4 ,,chapter ,i4 ,on the ,formation of ,character4 ,,section ,i4 ,importance of aiming high1 in the formation of character4 ,to those who have carefully examined the introduction and table of contents1 ,i am now prepared to give the following general direction2 ,fix upon a high standard of character4 ,to be thought well of1 is not sufficient4 ,the point you are to aim at1 is1 the greatest possible degree of usefulness4 ,some may think there is danger of setting too high a standard of action4 ,i have heard teachers contend that a child will learn to write much faster by having an inferior copy1 than by imitating one which is comparatively perfect2 'because1' say they1 'a pupil is liable to be discouraged if you give him a perfect copy2 but if it is only a little in advance of his own1 he will take courage from the belief that he shall soon be able to equal it4' ,i am fully convinced1 however1 that this is not so4 ,the more perfect the copy you place before the child1 provided it be written1 and not engraved1 the better4 ,for it must always be possible in the nature of things1 for the child to imitate it2 and what is not absolutely impossible1 every child may reasonably be expected to aspire after1 on the principle1 that whatever man has done1 man may do4 ,so in human conduct1 generally2 whatever is possible should be aimed at4 ,did my limits permit1 ,i might show that it is a part of the divine economy to place before his rational creatures a perfect standard of action1 and to make it their duty to come up to it4 ,he who only aims at little1 will accomplish but little4 ,expect great things1 and attempt great things4 ,a neglect of this rule produces more of the difference in the character1 conduct1 and success of men1 than is commonly supposed4 ,some start in life without any leading object at all2 some with a low one2 and some aim high3--and just in proportion to the elevation at which they aim1 will be their progress and success4 ,it is an old proverb that he who aims at the sun1 will not reach it1 to be sure1 but his arrow will fly higher than if he aims at an object on a level with himself4 ,exactly so is it1 in the formation of character1 except in one point4 ,to reach the sun with a arrow is an impossibility1 but a youth may aim high without attempting impossibilities4 ,let me repeat the assurance that1 as a general rule1 you may be whatever you will resolve to be4 ,determine that you will be useful in the world1 and you shall be4 ,young men seem to me utterly unconscious of what they are capable of being and doing4 ,their efforts are often few and feeble1 because they are not awake to a full conviction that any thing great or distinguished is in their power4 ,but whence came en ,alexander1 a ,caesar1 a ,charles ,,xii1 or a ,napoleon8 ,or whence the better order of spirits1--a ,paul1 an ,alfred1 a ,luther1 a ,howard1 a ,penn1 a ,washington8 ,were not these men once like yourselves8 ,what but self exertion1 aided by the blessing of ,heaven1 rendered these men so conspicuous for usefulness8 ,rely upon it1--what these men once were1 you may be4 ,or at the least1 you may make a nearer approach to them1 than you are ready to believe4 ,resolution is almost omnipotent4 ,those little words1 try1 and begin1 are sometimes great in their results4 ',i can't1' never accomplished any thing2--',i will try1' has achieved wonders4 ,this position might be proved and illustrated by innumerable facts2 but one must suffice4 ,a young man who had wasted his patrimony by profligacy1 whilst standing1 one day1 on the brow of a precipice from which he had determined to throw himself1 formed the sudden resolution to regain what he had lost4 ,the purpose thus formed was kept2 and though he began by shoveling a load of coals into a cellar1 for which he only received twelve and a half cents1 yet he proceeded from one step to another till he more than recovered his lost possessions1 and died worth sixty thousand pounds sterling4 ,you will derive much advantage from a careful perusal of the lives of eminent individuals1 especially of those who were good as well as great4 ,you will derive comparatively little benefit from reading the lives of those scourges of their race who have drenched the earth in blood1 except so far as it tends to show you what an immense blessing they might have been to the world1 had they devoted to the work of human improvement those mighty energies which were employed in human destruction4 ,could the physical and intellectual energy of ,napoleon1 the order and method of ,alfred1 the industry1 frugality1 and wisdom of ,franklin and ,washington1 and the excellence and untiring perseverance of ,paul1 and ,penn1 and ,howard1 be united in each individual of the rising generation1 who can set limits to the good1 which they might1 and inevitably would accomplish6 ,is it too much to hope that some happier age will witness the reality8 ,is it not even probable that the rising generation may afford many such examples8 ,,section ,,ii4 ,on ,motives to action4 ,not a few young men either have no fixed principles1 no governing motive at all1 or they are influenced by those which are low and unworthy4 ,it is painful to say this1 but it is too true4 ,on such1 ,i would press the importance of the following considerations4 ,among the motives to action which ,i would present1 the first is a regard to your own happiness4 ,to this you are by no means indifferent at present4 ,nay1 the attainment of happiness is your primary object4 ,you seek it in every desire1 word1 and action4 ,but you sometimes mistake the road that leads to it1 either for the want of a friendly hand to guide you1 or because you refuse to be guided4 ,or what is most common1 you grasp at a smaller good1 which is near1 and apparently certain1 and in so doing cut yourselves off from the enjoyment of a good which is often infinitely greater1 though more remote4 ,let me urge1 in the second place1 a regard for the family to which you belong4 ,it is true you can never fully know1 unless the bitterness of ingratitude should teach you1 the extent of the duty you owe to your relatives2 and especially to your parents4 ,you cannot know--at least till you are parents yourselves1--how their hearts are bound up in yours4 ,but if you do not in some measure know it1 till this late period1 you are not fit to be parents4 ,in the third place1 it is due to society1 particularly to the neighborhood or sphere in which you move1 and to the associations to which you may belong1 that you strive to attain a very great elevation of character4 ,here1 too1 ,i am well aware that it is impossible1 at your age1 to perceive fully1 how much you have it in your power to contribute1 if you will1 to the happiness of those around you2 and here again let me refer you to the advice and guidance of aged friends4 ,but1 fourthly1 it is due to the nation and age to which you belong1 that you fix upon a high standard of character4 ,this work is intended for ,american youth4 ,american6 did ,i say8 ,this word1 alone1 ought to call forth all your energies1 and if there be a slumbering faculty within you1 arouse it to action4 ,never1 since the creation1 were the youth of any age or country so imperiously called upon to exert themselves1 as those whom ,i now address4 ,never before were there so many important interests at stake4 ,never were such immense results depending upon a generation of men1 as upon that which is now approaching the stage of action4 ,these rising millions are destined1 according to all human probability1 to form by far the greatest nation that ever constituted an entire community of freemen1 since the world began4 ,to form the character of these millions involves a greater amount of responsibility1 individual and collective1 than any other work to which humanity has ever been called4 ,and the reasons are1 it seems to me1 obvious4 ,now it is for you1 my young friends1 to determine whether these weighty responsibilities shall be fulfilled4 ,it is for you to decide whether this greatest of free nations shall1 at the same time1 be the best4 ,and as every nation is made up of individuals1 you are each1 in reality1 called upon daily1 to settle this question3 ',shall the ,united ,states1 possessing the most ample means of instruction within the reach of nearly all her citizens1 the happiest government1 the healthiest of climates1 the greatest abundance of the best and most wholesome nutriment1 with every other possible means for developing all the powers of human nature1 be peopled with the most vigorous1 powerful1 and happy race of human beings which the world has ever known8' ,there is another motive to which ,i beg leave1 for one moment1 to direct your attention4 ,you are bound to fix on a high standard of action1 from the desire of obeying the will of ,god4 ,he it is who has cast your lot in a country which--all things considered--is the happiest below the sun4 ,he it is who has given you such a wonderful capacity for happiness1 and instituted the delightful relations of parent and child1 and brother and sister1 and friend and neighbor4 ,i might add1 ,he it is1 too1 who has given you the name ,american1--a name which alone furnishes a passport to many civilized lands1 and like a good countenance1 or a becoming dress1 prepossesses every body in your favor4 ,but what young man is there1 ,i may be asked1 who is not influenced more or less1 by all the motives which have been enumerated8 ,who is there that does not seek his own happiness8 ,who does not desire to please his parents and other relatives1 his friends and his neighbors8 ,who does not wish to be distinguished for his attachment to country and to liberty8 ,nay1 who has not even some regard1 in his conduct1 to the will of ,god8 ,i grant that many young men1 probably the most of those into whose hands this book will be likely to fall1 are influenced1 more or less1 by all these considerations4 ,all pursue their own happiness1 no doubt4 ,by far the majority of the young have1 also1 a general respect for the good opinion of others1 and the laws of the ,creator4 ,still1 do not thousands and tens of thousands mistake1 as ,i have already intimated1 in regard to what really promotes their own happiness8 ,is there any certainty that the greatest happiness of a creature can be secured without consulting the will of the ,creator8 ,and do not those young persons greatly err1 who suppose that they can secure a full amount1 even of earthly blessings1 without conforming1 with the utmost strictness1 to those rules for conduct1 which the ,bible and the ,book of ,nature1 so plainly make known8 ,too many young men expect happiness from wealth4 ,this is their great object of study and action1 by night and by day4 ,not that they suppose there is an inherent value in the wealth itself1 but only that it will secure the means of procuring the happiness they so ardently desire4 ,but the farther they go1 in the pursuit of wealth1 for the sake of happiness1 especially if successful in their plans and business1 the more they forget their original purpose1 and seek wealth for the sake of wealth4 ,to get rich1 is their principal motive to action4 ,so it is in regard to the exclusive pursuit of sensual pleasure1 or civil distinction4 ,the farther we go1 the more we lose our original character1 and the more we become devoted to the objects of pursuit1 and incapable of being roused by other motives4 ,the laws of ,god1 whether we find them in the constitution of the universe around us1 or go higher and seek them in the revealed word1 are founded on a thorough knowledge of human nature1 and all its tendencies4 ,do you study natural science--the laws which govern matter1 animate and inanimate8 ,what is the lesson which it constantly inculcates1 but that it is man's highest interest not to violate or attempt to violate the rules which ,infinite ,wisdom has adopted2 and that every violation of his laws brings punishment along with it8 ,do you study the laws of ,god1 as revealed in the ,bible8 ,and do not they1 too1 aim to inculcate the necessity of constant and endless obedience to his will1 at the same time that their rejection is accompanied by the severest penalties which heaven and earth can inflict8 ,what1 in short1 is the obvious design of the ,creator1 wherever and whenever any traces of his character and purposes can be discovered8 ,what1 indeed1 but to show us that it is our most obvious duty and interest to love and obey ,him8 ,the young man whose highest motives are to seek his own happiness1 and please his friends and neighbors1 and the world around him1 does much4 ,this should never be denied4 ,he merits much--not in the eye of ,god1 for of this ,i have nothing to say in this volume--but from his fellow men4 ,and although he may have never performed a single action from a desire to obey ,god1 and make his fellow men really better1 as well as happier1 he may still have been exceedingly useful1 compared with a large proportion of mankind4 ,but suppose a young man possesses a character of this stamp--and such there are4 ,how is he ennobled1 how is the dignity of his nature advanced1 how is he elevated from the rank of a mere companion of creatures1--earthly creatures1 too1--to that of a meet companion and fit associate for the inhabitants of the celestial world1 and the ,father of all2 when to these traits1 so excellent and amiable in themselves1 is joined the pure and exalted desire to pursue his studies and his employments1 his pleasures and his pastimes--in a word1 every thing--even the most trifling concern which is worth doing1 exactly as ,god would wish to have it done2 and make the means of so doing1 his great and daily study8 ,this1 then1 brings us to the highest of human motives to action1 the love of ,god4 ,thou shalt love the ,lord thy ,god supremely1 and thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself1 are the two great commands which bind the human family together4 ,when our love to ,god is evinced by pure love to man1 and it is our constant prayer1 ',lord what wilt thou have me to do2' then we come under the influence of motives which are worthy of creatures destined to immortality4 ,when it is our meat and drink1 from a sacred regard to the ,father of our spirits1 and of all things in the universe1 material and immaterial1 to make every thought1 word and action1 do good--have a bearing upon the welfare of one or more1 and the more the better--of our race1 then alone do we come up to the dignity of our nature1 and1 by ,divine aid1 place ourselves in the situation for which the ,god of nature and of grace designed us4 99 99 99 99 99 ,i have thus treated1 at greater length than ,i had at first intended1 of the importance of having an elevated aim1 and of the motives to action4 ,on the means by which young men are to attain this elevation1 it is the purpose of this little work to dwell plainly and fully4 ,these means might be classed in three great divisions2 viz4 physical1 mental1 and moral4 ,whatever relates to the health1 belongs to the first division2 whatever to the improvement of the mind1 the second2 and the formation of good manners and virtuous habits1 constitutes the third4 ,but although an arrangement of this sort might have been more logical1 it would probably have been less interesting to the reader4 ,the means of religious improvement1 appropriately so called1 require a volume of themselves4 ,,section ,,iii4 ,industry4 ,nothing is more essential to usefulness and happiness in life1 than habits of industry4 ',this we commanded you1' says ,st4 ,paul1 'that if any would not work1 neither should he eat4' ,now this would be the sober dictate of good sense1 had the apostle never spoken4 ,it is just as true now as it was #b1jjj years ago1 that no person possessing a sound mind in a healthy body1 has a right to live in this world without labor4 ,if he claims an existence on any other condition1 let him betake himself to some other planet4 ,there are many kinds of labor4 ,some which are no less useful than others1 are almost exclusively mental4 ,you may make your own selection from a very wide range of employments1 all1 perhaps1 equally important to society4 ,but something you must do4 ,even if you happen to inherit an ample fortune1 your health and happiness demand that you should labor4 ,to live in idleness1 even if you have the means1 is not only injurious to yourself1 but a species of fraud upon the community1 and the children1--if children you ever have1--who have a claim upon you for what you can earn and do4 ,let me prevail with you then1 when ,i urge you to set out in life fully determined to depend chiefly on yourself1 for pecuniary support2 and to be in this respect1 independent4 ,in a country where the general rule is that a person shall rise1--if he rise at all1--by his own merit1 such a resolution is indispensable4 ,it is usually idle to be looking out for support from some other quarter4 ,suppose you should obtain a place of office or trust through the friendship1 favor1 or affection of others2 what then8 ,why1 you hold your post at uncertainties4 ,it may be taken from you at almost any hour4 ,but if you depend on yourself alone1 in this respect1 your mountain stands strong1 and cannot very easily be moved4 ,he who lives upon any thing except his own labor1 is incessantly surrounded by rivals4 ,he is in daily danger of being out-bidden2 his very bread depends upon caprice1 and he lives in a state of never ceasing fear4 ,his is not1 indeed1 the dog's life1 'hunger and idleness1' but it is worse2 for it is 'idleness with slavery2' the latter being just the price of the former4 ,slaves1 are often well fed and decently clothed2 but they dare not speak4 ,they dare not be suspected even to think differently from their master1 despise his acts as much as they may2--let him be tyrant1 drunkard1 fool1 or all three at once1 they must either be silent1 or lose his approbation4 ,though possessing a thousand times his knowledge1 they yield to his assumption of superior understanding2 though knowing it is they who1 in fact1 do all that he is paid for doing1 it is destruction to them to seem as if they thought any portion of the service belonged to themselves4 ,you smile1 perhaps1 and ask what all this tirade against slavery means4 ,but remember1 there is slavery of several kinds4 ,there is mental slavery as well as bodily2 and the former is not confined to any particular division of the ,united ,states4 ,begin1 too1 with a determination to labor through life4 ,there are many who suppose that when they have secured to themselves a competence1 they shall sit with folded arms1 in an easy chair1 the rest of their days1 and enjoy it4 ,but they may be assured that this will never do4 ,the very fact of a person's having spent the early and middle part of life in active usefulness1 creates a necessity1 to the body and mind1 of its continuance4 ,by this is not meant that men should labor as hard in old age1 even in proportion to their strength1 as in early life4 ,youth requires a great variety and amount of action1 maturity not so much1 and age still less4 ,yet so much as age does1 in fact1 demand1 is more necessary than to those who are younger4 ,children are so tenacious of life1 that they do not appear to suffer immediately1 if exercise is neglected2 though a day of reckoning must finally come4 ,hence we see the reason why those who retire from business towards the close of life1 so often become diseased1 in body and mind2 and instead of enjoying life1 or making those around them happy1 become a source of misery to themselves and others4 ,most people have a general belief in the importance of industrious habits2 and yet not a few make strange work in endeavoring to form them4 ,some attempt to do it by compulsion2 others by flattery4 ,some think it is to be accomplished by set lessons1 in spite of example2 others by example alone4 ,a certain father who was deeply convinced of the importance of forming his sons to habits of industry1 used to employ them whole days in removing and replacing heaps of stones4 ,this was well intended1 and arose from regarding industry as a high accomplishment2 but there is some danger of defeating our own purpose in this way1 and of producing disgust4 ,besides this1 labor enough can usually be obtained which is obviously profitable4 ,all persons1 without exception1 ought to labor more or less1 every day in the open air4 ,of the truth of this opinion1 the public are beginning to be sensible2 and hence we hear much said1 lately1 about manual labor schools4 ,those who1 from particular circumstances1 cannot labor in the open air1 should substitute in its place some active mechanical employment1 together with suitable calisthenic or gymnastic exercises4 ,it is a great misfortune of the present day1 that almost every one is1 by his own estimate1 raised above his real state of life4 ,nearly every person you meet with is aiming at a situation in which he shall be exempted from the drudgery of laboring with his hands4 ,now we cannot all become 'lords' and 'gentlemen1' if we would4 ,there must be a large part of us1 after all1 to make and mend clothes and houses1 and carry on trade and commerce1 and1 in spite of all that we can do1 the far greater part of us must actually work at something2 otherwise we fall under the sentence2 ',he who will not work shall not eat4' ,yet1 so strong is the propensity to be thought 'gentlemen2' so general is this desire amongst the youth of this proud money making nation1 that thousands upon thousands of them are1 at this moment1 in a state which may end in starvation2 not so much because they are too lazy to earn their bread1 as because they are too proud6 ,and what are the consequences8 ,a lazy youth becomes a burden to those parents1 whom he ought to comfort1 if not support4 ,always aspiring to something higher than he can reach1 his life is a life of disappointment and shame4 ,if marriage befall him1 it is a real affliction1 involving others as well as himself4 ,his lot is a thousand times worse than that of the common laborer4 ,nineteen times out of twenty a premature death awaits him3 and1 alas6 how numerous are the cases in which that death is most miserable1 not to say ignominious6 ,,section ,,iv4 ,on ,economy4 ,there is a false1 as well as a true economy4 ,i have seen an individual who1 with a view to economy1 was in the habit of splitting his wafers4 ,sometimes a thick wafer can be split into two1 which will answer a very good purpose2 but at others1 both parts fall to pieces4 ,let the success be ever so complete1 however1 all who reflect for a moment on the value of time1 must see it to be a losing process4 ,i knew a laboring man who would hire a horse1 and spend the greater part of a day1 in going six or eight miles and purchasing half a dozen bushels of grain1 at sixpence less a bushel than he must have given near home4 ,thus to gain fifty cents1 he subjected himself to an expense1 in time and money1 of one hundred and fifty4 ,these are very common examples of defective economy2 and of that 'withholding' which the ,scripture says 'tends to poverty4' ,economy in time is economy of money--for it needs not ,franklin to tell us that time is equivalent to money4 ,besides1 ,i never knew a person who was economical of the one1 who was not equally so of the other4 ,economy of time will1 therefore1 be an important branch of study4 ,but the study is rather difficult4 ,for though every young man of common sense knows that an hour is sixty minutes1 very few seem to know that sixty minutes make an hour4 ,on this account many waste fragments of time1--of one1 two1 three or five minutes each--without hesitation1 and apparently without regret2--never thinking that fifteen or twenty such fragments are equal to a full hour4 ',take care of the pence1 the pounds will take care of themselves1' is not more true1 than that hours will take care of themselves1 if you will only secure the minutes4#a ,in order to form economical habits1 several important points must be secured4 ,you must have for every purpose and thing a time1 and place2 and every thing must be done at the time1 and all things put in their place4 #a4 ,every thing must be done at the time4 ,whether you attempt little or much1 let every hour have its employment1 in business1 study1 social conversation1 or diversion2 and unless it be on extraordinary occasions1 you must not suffer your plan to be broken4 ,it is in this way that many men who perform an incredible amount of business1 have abundant leisure4 ,and it is for want of doing business systematically that many who effect but little1 never find much leisure4 ,they spend their lives in literally 'doing nothing4' ,an eminent prime minister of ,holland was asked how he could perform such a vast amount of business1 as it was known he did1 and yet have so much leisure4 ',i do every thing at the time2' was the reply4 ,some of you will say you have no room for any plan of your own2 that your whole time is at the will of your master1 or employer4 ,but this is not so4 ,there are few persons who are so entirely devoted to others as not to have minutes1 if not hours1 every day1 which they can call their own4 ,now here it is that character is tried and proved4 ,he alone who is wise in small matters1 will be wise in large ones4 ,whether your unoccupied moments amount in a day to half an hour1 or an hour1 or two hours1 have something to do in each of them4 ,if it be social conversation1 the moment your hour arrives1 engage in it at once2 if study1 engage at once in that4 ,the very fact that you have but a very few minutes at your command1 will create an interest in your employment during that time4 ,perhaps no persons read to better purpose than those who have but very little leisure4 ,some of the very best minds have been formed in this manner4 ,to repeat their names would be to mention a host of self educated men1 in this and in other countries4 ,to show what can be done1 ,i will mention one fact which fell under my own observation4 ,a young man1 about fifteen years of age1 unaccustomed to study1 and with a mind wholly undisciplined1 read ,rollin's ,ancient ,history through in about three months1 or a fourth of a year2 and few persons were ever more closely confined to a laborious employment than he was during the whole time4 ,now to read four such works as ,rollin in a year1 is by no means a matter to be despised4 #b4 ,every thing should have its place4 ,going into a shop1 the other day1 where a large number of persons were employed1 ,i observed the following motto1 in large letters1 pasted on the side of the room2 ',put every thing in its proper place4' ,i found the owner of the shop to be a man of order and economy4 ,an old gentleman of my acquaintance1 who always had a place for every thing1 made it a rule1 if any thing was out of its place1 and none of his children could find it1 to blame the whole of them4 ,this was an unreasonable measure1 but produced its intended effect4 ,his whole family follow his example2 they have a place for every thing1 and they put every thing in its place4 ,unless both the foregoing rules are observed1 true economy does not and cannot exist4 ,but without economy1 life is of little comparative value to ourselves or others4 ,this trait of character is generally claimed1 but more rarely possessed4 #a ,a teacher1 who has been pleased to say much in behalf of this work1 and to do much to extend its circulation1 in a late letter1 very modestly1 but properly makes the following inquiry2 ',has not ,dr4 ,franklin's precept1 time is money1 made many misers8 ,is it not used without sufficient qualification8' ,there is no good thing1 nor any good advice1 but what may be abused1 if used or taken without qualification4 ,there may be misers in regard to time1 as well as money2 and no one can become miserly in the one respect without soon becoming so in the other4 ,he who cannot or rather will not give any portion of his time to promote the happiness of those around him1 in the various ways of doing good1 which perpetually offer1 lest it should take from his means of earning property1 is as much to be pitied as he who hoards all his dollars and cents4 ,still it is true that youth should husband well their time1 and avoid wasting either that or their money4 ,,section ,v4 ,indolence4 ,one of the greatest obstacles in the road to excellence1 is indolence4 ,i have known young men who would reason finely on the value of time1 and the necessity of rising early and improving every moment of it4 ,yet ,i have also known these same aspiring young men to lie dozing1 an hour or two in the morning1 after the wants of nature had been reasonably1 and more than reasonably gratified4 ,you can no more rouse them1 with all their fine arguments1 than you can a log4 ,there they lie1 completely enchained by indolence4 ,i have known others continually complain of the shortness of time2 that they had no time for business1 no time for study1 c4 ,yet they would lavish hours in yawning at a public house1 or hesitating whether they had better go to the theatre or stay2 or whether they had better get up1 or indulge in 'a little more slumber4' ,such people wear the most galling chains1 and as long as they continue to wear them there is no reasoning with them4 ,an indolent person is scarcely human2 he is half quadruped1 and of the most stupid species too4 ,he may have good intentions of discharging a duty1 while that duty is at a distance2 but let it approach1 let him view the time of action as near1 and down go his hands in languor4 ,he wills1 perhaps2 but he unwills in the next breath4 ,what is to be done with such a man1 especially if he is a young one8 ,he is absolutely good for nothing4 ,business tires him2 reading fatigues him2 the public service interferes with his pleasures1 or restrains his freedom4 ,his life must be passed on a bed of down4 ,if he is employed1 moments are as hours to him--if he is amused1 hours are as moments4 ,in general1 his whole time eludes him1 he lets it glide unheeded1 like water under a bridge4 ,ask him what he has done with his morning1--he cannot tell you2 for he has lived without reflection1 and almost without knowing whether he has lived at all4 ,the indolent man sleeps as long as it is possible for him to sleep1 dresses slowly1 amuses himself in conversation with the first person that calls upon him1 and loiters about till dinner4 ,or if he engages in any employment1 however important1 he leaves it the moment an opportunity of talking occurs4 ,at length dinner is served up2 and after lounging at the table a long time1 the evening will probably be spent as unprofitably as the morning3 and this it may be1 is no unfair specimen of his whole life4 ,and is not such a wretch1 for it is improper to call him a man--good for nothing8 ,what is he good for8 ,how can any rational being be willing to spend the precious gift of life in a manner so worthless1 and so much beneath the dignity of human nature8 ,when he is about stepping into the grave1 how can he review the past with any degree of satisfaction8 ,what is his history1 whether recorded here or there1--in golden letters1 or on the plainest slab--but1 'he was born' and 'he died6' ,,section ,,vi4 ,early ,rising and ,rest4 ,dr4 ,rush mentions a patient of his who thought himself wonderfully abstinent because he drank no spirituous or fermented liquors1 except a bottle of wine or so1 after dinner6 ,in like manner some call it early to retire at ten or eleven o'clock4 ,others think ten very late4 ,dr4 ,good1 an ,english writer on medicine1 in treating of the appropriate means of preventing the gout in those who are predisposed to it1 after giving directions in regard to diet1 drink1 exercise1 c41 recommends an early hour of retiring to rest4 ',by all means1' says he1 'you should go to bed by eleven4' ,to half the population of ,new ,england such a direction would seem strange2 but by the inhabitants of cities and large towns1 who already begin to ape the customs and fashions of the old world1 the caution is well understood4 ,people who are in the habit of making and attending parties which commence at #i or #aj o'clock in the evening1 can hardly be expected to rise with the sun4 ,we hear much said about the benefit of the morning air4 ,many wise men have supposed the common opinion on this subject to be erroneous2 and that the mistake has arisen from the fact that being refreshed and invigorated by rest1 the change is within instead of without2 that our physical frames and mental faculties are more healthy than they were the previous evening1 rather than that the surrounding atmosphere has altered4 ,whether the morning air is more healthy or not1 it is certainly healthy enough4 ,besides1 there are so many reasons for early rising that if ,i can persuade the reader to go to bed early1 ,i shall have little fear of his lying late in the morning4 #ast4 ,he who rises early and plans his work1 and early sets himself about it1 generally finds his business go well with him the whole day4 ,he has taken time by the foretop2 and will be sure to go before1 or drive his business2 while his more tardy neighbor 'suffers his business to drive him4' ,there is something striking in the feeling produced by beginning a day's work thus seasonably4 ,it gives an impulse to a man's thoughts1 speech1 and actions1 which usually lasts through the day4 ,this is not a mere whim1 but sober fact2 as can be attested by thousands4 ,the person who rises late1 usually pleads 7for mankind are very ingenious in defence of what falls in with their own inclinations17 that he does as much in the progress of the day1 as those who rise early4 ,this may1 in a few instances1 be true2 but in general1 facts show the reverse4 ,the motions of the early riser will be more lively and vigorous all day4 ,he may1 indeed1 become dull late in the evening1 but he ought to be so4 ,sir ,matthew ,hale said that after spending a ,sunday well1 the rest of the week was usually prosperous4 ,this is doubtless to be accounted for--in part at least--on the above principle4 #b4 ,in the warm season1 the morning is the most agreeable time for labor4 ,many farmers and mechanics in the country perform a good half day's work before the people of the city scarcely know that the sun shines4#b #c4 ,to lie snoring late in the morning1 assimilates us to the most beastly of animals4 ,burgh1 an ingenious ,english writer1 justly observes2 ',there is no time spent more stupidly than that which some luxurious people pass in a morning between sleeping and waking1 after nature has been fully gratified4 ,he who is awake may be doing something3 he who is asleep1 is receiving the refreshment necessary to fit him for action3 but the hours spent in dozing and slumbering can hardly be called existence4' ,the late ,dr4 ,smith1 of ,yale ,college1 in his lectures1 used to urge on his hearers never to take 'the second nap4' ,he said that if this rule were steadily and universally followed by persons in health1--there would be no dozing or oversleeping4 ,if1 for once1 they should awake from the first nap before nature was sufficiently restored1 the next night would restore the proper balance4 ,in laying this down as a rule1 ,dr4 ,smith would1 of course1 except those instances in which we are awakened by accident4 #d4 ,it has been remarked by experienced physicians that they have seldom1 if ever1 known a person of great age1 who was not an early riser4 ,in enumerating the causes of longevity1 ,rush and ,sinclair both include early rising4 #e4 ,it is a trite but just maxim that one hour's sleep before midnight is worth two afterward4 ,why it is so1 would perhaps be difficult to say4 ,the power of habit is great1 and as the majority of children are trained to go to bed early1 perhaps this will in part account for the fact4 ,so when the usual hour for meal arrives1 a given amount of food eaten at the time1 is digested in a more healthy and regular manner than if eaten one1 or two1 or three hours afterwards4 ,again1 nature certainly intended man should exercise during the day1 and sleep in the night4 ,i do not say the whole night2 because in the winter and in high northern latitudes1 this would be devoting an unreasonable portion of time to sleep4 ,it would hardly do to sleep three or four months4 ,but in all countries1 and in all climates1 we should try to sleep half our hours before midnight4 #f4 ,the person who1 instead of going to bed at nine1 sits up till eleven1 and then sleeps during two hours of daylight the following morning1 is grossly negligent of economy4 ,for1 suppose he makes this his constant practice1 during his whole business life1 say fifty years4 ,the extra oil or tallow which he would consume would not be estimated at less than one cent an evening2 which1 in fifty years would be #ahb4ej4 ,not a very large sum to be sure2 but1 to every young man1 worth saving2 since1 to a community of #a1jjj young men1 the amount would be no less than #ahb1ejj4 ,then the loss in health and strength would be far greater1 though it is obvious that it cannot so easily be computed4 #g4 ,once more4 ,if an hour's sleep before midnight is worth more than an hour in the morning1 then an hour in the morning is of course worth less than an hour before midnight1 and a person must sleep a greater number of hours in the morning to obtain an equal amount of rest4 ,a person retiring at eleven and rising at eight1 would probably get no more rest1 possibly less1 than a person who should sleep from nine to five2--a period one hour shorter4 ,but if so1 he actually loses an hour of time a day4 ,and you well know1 if ,franklin had not told you so1 that time is money4 ,now1 if we estimate the value of this time at ten cents an hour for one person in four1 of the population of the ,united ,states--and this is probably a fair estimate--the loss to an individual in a year1 or #cac working days1 would be #ca4cj2 and in #ej years #a1efe4 ,a sum sufficient to buy a good farm in many parts of the country4 ,the loss to a population equal to that of the ,united ,states1 would1 in fifty years1 be no less than five thousand and eighty-six millions of dollars6 ,but this is not the whole loss4 ,the time of the young and old is beyond all price for the purposes of mental and moral improvement4 ,especially is this true of the precious golden hours of the morning4 ,think1 then1 of the immense waste in a year6 ,at twelve hours a day1 more than a million of years of valuable time are wasted annually in the ,united ,states4 ,i have hitherto made my estimates on the supposition that we do not sleep too much1 in the aggregate1 and that the only loss sustained arises from the manner of procuring it4 ,but suppose1 once more1 we sleep an hour too much daily4 ,this involves a waste just twice as great as that which we have already estimated4 ,do you startle at these estimates6 ,it is proper that many of you should4 ,you have misspent time enough4 ,awake your 'drowsy souls1' and shake off your stupid habits4 ,think of ,napoleon breaking up the boundaries of kingdoms1 and dethroning kings1 and to accomplish these results1 going through with an amount of mental and bodily labor that few constitutions would be equal to1 with only four hours of sleep in the twenty-four4 ,think of ,brougham too1 who works as many hours1 perhaps1 as any man in ,england1 and has as much influence1 and yet sleeps as few2 i4e41 only four4 ,a hundred persons might be named1 and the list would include some of the greatest benefactors of their race1 who never think of sleeping more than six hours a day4 ,and yet many of you are scarcely contented with eight6 ,would you conquer as ,bonaparte did--not states1 provinces1 and empires1--but would you aspire to the high honor of conquering yourselves1 and of extending your conquests intellectually and morally1 you must take the necessary steps4 ,the path is a plain one2 requiring nothing but a little moral courage4 ',what man has done1 man may do4' ,i know you do not and ought not to aspire to conquer kingdoms1 or to become prime ministers2 but you ought to aspire to get the victory over yourselves3--a victory as much more noble than those of ,napoleon1 and ,caesar1 and ,alexander1 as intellectual and moral influence are superior to mere brute force4 #b ,dr4 ,franklin1 in view of the latter fact1 wrote a humorous ,essay1 at ,paris1 in which he labored hard to show the people of that luxurious and dissipated city1 that the sun gives light as soon as it rises4 ,,section ,,vii4 ,on ,duty to ,parents4 ,it was the opinion of a very eminent and observing man1 that those who are obedient to parents1 are more healthy1 long lived1 and happy than those who are disobedient4 ,and he reasons very fairly on the subject4 ,now ,i do not know whether the promise annexed to the fifth command1 7whatever might have been intended1 as addressed to the ,jews17 has any special reference to happiness in this life4 ,i only know that in general1 those who are obedient to parents are apt to be virtuous in other respects2 for the virtues as well as the vices usually go in companies4 ,but that virtue in general tends to long life and happiness1 nobody will entertain a doubt4 ,i am sorry1 however1 to find that the young1 when they approach adult years1 are apt to regard authority as irksome4 ,it should not be so4 ,so long as they remain under the parental roof1 they ought to feel it a pleasure to conform to the wishes of the parents in all the arraignments of the family1 if not absolutely unreasonable4 ,and even in the latter case1 it is my own opinion--and one which has not been hastily formed1 either--that it would be better to submit1 with cheerfulness2 and for three reasons4 #ast4 ,for the sake of your own reputation2 which will always be endangered by disobedience1 however unjust the parental claim may be4 #b;d4 ,from a love of your parents1 and a sense of what you owe them for their kind care2 together with a conviction that perfect rectitude is not to be expected4 ,you will find error1 more or less1 every where around you--even in yourselves2 why should you expect perfection in your parents8 #c;d4 ,because it is better to suffer wrong than to do wrong4 ,perhaps there is nothing which so improves human character1 as suffering wrongfully2 although the world may be slow to admit the principle4 ,more than this2 ,god himself has said a great deal about obedience to parents4 ,if real evils multiply so that a young man finds he cannot remain in his father's house1 without suffering not only in his feelings1 but permanently in his temper and disposition1 ,i will not say that it is never best to leave it4 ,i do not believe1 however1 there is often any such necessity4 ,of those who leave their paternal home on this plea1 ,i believe nine hundred and ninety-nine in a thousand might profitably remain1 if they would2 and that a very large number would find the fault in themselves--in their own temper1 disposition or mistaken views--rather than in their parents4 ,and what is to be gained by going away8 ,unfortunately this is a question too seldom asked by restless1 or headstrong youths2 and when asked and answered1 it is usually found that their unhappy experience proves the answer to have been incorrect4 ,i have seldom known a youth turn out well who left his parents or his guardian or master4 ,on this subject1 ,franklin1 ,i know1 is often triumphantly referred to2 but for one such instance as that1 ,i hazard nothing in saying there are hundreds of a contrary character4 ,within the circle of my own observation1 young men who leave in this manner1 have wished themselves back again a thousand times4 ,but be this as it may1 so long as you remain in the family1 if you are #gj years of age1 by all means yield to authority implicitly1 and if possible1 cheerfully4 ,avoid1 at least1 altercation and reproaches4 ,if things do not go well1 fix your eye upon some great example of suffering wrongfully1 and endeavor to profit by it4 ,there is no sight more attractive than that of a well ordered family2 one in which every child1 whether five years old or fifty1 submits cheerfully to those rules and regulations which parental authority has thought fit to impose4 ,it is1 to use a strong expression1 an image of heaven4 ,but1 exactly in the same proportion1 a family of the contrary character resembles the regions below4 ,nor is this all4 ,it is an ancient maxim1--and however despised by some of the moderns1 none can be more true1--that he only is fit to command who has first learned to obey4 ,obedience1 is1 in fact1 the great lesson of human life4 ,we first learn to yield our will to the dictates of parental love and wisdom4 ,through them we learn to yield submissively to the great laws of the ,creator1 as established in the material world4 ,we learn to avoid1 if possible1 the flame1 the hail1 the severity of the cold1 the lightning1 the tornado1 and the earthquake2 and we do not choose to fall from a precipice1 to have a heavy body fall on us1 to receive vitriol or arsenic into our stomachs1 7at least in health7 or to remain a very long time1 immersed in water1 or buried in the earth4 ,we submit also to the government under which we live4 ,all these are lessons of obedience4 ,but the ,christian goes farther2 and it is his purpose to obey not only all these laws1 but any additional ones he may find imposed1 whether they pertain to material or immaterial existences4 ,in short1 he who would put himself in the most easy position1 in the sphere allotted him by the ,author of ,nature1 must learn to obey1--often implicitly and unconditionally4 ,at least he must know how to obey3 and the earlier this knowledge is acquired1 and corresponding habits established1 the better and happier will he find his condition1 and the more quiet his conscience4 ,,section ,,viii4 ,faithfulness4 ,hardly any thing pleases me more in a young man1 than faithfulness to those for whom he is employed1 whether parents1 guardians1 masters1 or others4 ,there appears to be a strange misapprehension1 in the minds of many1 in regard to this point4 ,there are few who will not admit1 in theory1 whatever may be their practice1 that they ought to be faithful to their parents4 ,and by far the majority of the young doubtless perceive the propriety of being faithful to their masters2 so long at least1 as they are present4 ,i will even go farther and admit that the number of young men--sons1 wards1 apprentices1 and servants--who would willingly be so far unfaithful as to do any thing positively wrong because those who are set over them happen to be absent1 is by no means considerable4 ,but by faithfulness to our employers1 ,i mean something more than the mere doing of things because we are obliged to do them1 or because we must4 ,i wish to see young men feel an interest in the well being and success of their employers2 and take as good care of their concerns and property1 whether they are present or absent1 as if they were their own4 ,the youth who would be more industrious1 persevering1 prudent1 economical1 and attentive in business1 if the profits were his own1 than he now is1 does not in my opinion come up to the mark at which he should aim4 ,the great apology for what ,i call unfaithfulness to employers1 is1 ',what shall ,i get by it8' that is1 by being faithful4 ,i have seen many a young man who would labor at the employment regularly assigned him1 during a certain number of hours1 or till a certain job was completed1 after which he seemed unwilling to lift a finger1 except for his own amusement1 gratification1 or emolument4 ,a few minutes' labor might repair a breach in a wall or corn crib1 and save the owner many dollars' worth of property1 but it is passed by6 ,by putting a few deranged parcels of goods in their proper place1 or writing down some small item of account1 which would save his employer much loss of time or money1 or both1 a faithful clerk might often do a great service4 ,would he not do it1 if the loss was to be his own8 ,why not then do it for his employer8 ,those who neglect things1 or perform them lazily or carelessly1 because they imagine they shall get nothing for it1 would do well to read the following story of a devoted and faithful domestic2 which ,i suppose to be a fact4 ,it needs no comment4 ,a ,mahratta ,prince1 in passing through a certain apartment1 one day1 discovered one of his servants asleep with his master's slippers clasped so tightly to his breast1 that he was unable to disengage them4 ,struck with the fact1 and concluding at once1 that a person who was so jealously careful of a trifle1 could not fail to be faithful when entrusted with a thing of more importance1 he appointed him a member of his body-guards4 ,the result proved that the prince was not mistaken4 ,rising in office1 step by step1 the young man soon became the most distinguished military commander in ,mahratta2 and his fame ultimately spread through all ,india4 ,,section ,,ix4 ,on ,forming ,temperate ,habits4 ',be temperate in all things1' is an excellent rule1 and of very high authority4 ,drunkenness and ,gluttony are vices so degrading1 that advice is1 ,i must confess1 nearly lost on those who are capable of indulging in them4 ,if any youth1 unhappily initiated in these odious and debasing vices1 should happen to see what ,i am now writing1 ,i beg him to read the command of ,god1 to the ,israelites1 ,deut4 xxi4 ,the father and mother are to take the bad son 'and bring him to the elders of the city2 and they shall say to the elders1 this our son will not obey our voice3 he is a glutton and a drunkard4 ,and all the men of the city shall stone him with stones1 that he die4' ,this will give him some idea of the odiousness of his crime1 at least in the sight of ,heaven4 ,but indulgence far short of gross drunkenness and gluttony is to be deprecated2 and the more so1 because it is too often looked upon as being no crime at all4 ,nay1 there are many persons1 who boast of a refined taste in matters connected with eating and drinking1 who are so far from being ashamed of employing their thoughts on the subject1 that it is their boast that they do it4 ,gregory1 one of the ,christian fathers1 says3 ',it is not the quantity or the quality of the meat1 or drink1 but the love of it1 that is condemned3' that is to say1 the indulgence beyond the absolute demands of nature2 the hankering after it2 the neglect of some duty or other for the sake of the enjoyments of the table4 ,i believe1 however1 there may be error1 both in quantity and quality4 ,this love of what are called 'good eating and drinking1' if very unamiable in grown persons1 is perfectly hateful in a youth2 and1 if he indulge in the propensity1 he is already half ruined4 ,to warn you against acts of fraud1 robbery1 and violence1 is not here my design4 ,neither am ,i speaking against acts which the jailor and the hangman punish1 nor against those moral offences which all men condemn1 but against indulgences1 which1 by men in general1 are deemed not only harmless1 but meritorious2 but which observation has taught me to regard as destructive to human happiness2 and against which all ought to be cautioned1 even in their boyish days4 ,such indulgences are1 in the first place1 very expensive4 ,the materials are costly1 and the preparation still more so4 ,what a monstrous thing1 that1 in order to satisfy the appetite of one person there must be one or two others at work constantly4#c ,more fuel1 culinary implements1 kitchen room3 what6 all these merely to tickle the palate of four or five people1 and especially people who can hardly pay their bills6 ,and1 then1 the loss of time--the time spent in pleasing the palate6 ,a young man1 says an ,english writer1 some years ago1 offered himself to me1 as an amanuensis1 for which he appeared to be perfectly qualified4 ,the terms were settled1 and ,i requested him to sit down1 and begin2 but looking out of the window1 whence he could see the church clock1 he said1 somewhat hastily1 ',i cannot stop now sir1 ,i must go to dinner4' ',oh6' said ,i1 'you must go to dinner1 must you6 ,let the dinner1 which you must wait upon to-day1 have your constant services1 then2 for you and ,i shall never agree4' ,he had told me that he was in great distress for want of employment2 and yet1 when relief was there before his eyes1 he could forego it for the sake of getting at his eating and drinking three or four hours sooner than was necessary4 ,this anecdote is good1 so far as it shows the folly of an unwillingness to deny ourselves in small matters1 in any circumstances4 ,and yet punctuality1 even at meals1 is not to be despised4 ,water-drinkers are universally laughed at3 but1 it has always seemed to me1 that they are amongst the most welcome of guests1 and that1 too1 though the host be by no means of a niggardly turn4 ,the truth is1 they give no trouble2 they occasion no anxiety to please them2 they are sure not to make their sittings inconveniently long2 and1 above all1 their example teaches moderation to the rest of the company4 ,your notorious 'lovers of good cheer' are1 on the contrary1 not to be invited without due reflection4 ,to entertain one of them is a serious business2 and as people are not apt voluntarily to undertake such pieces of business1 the well-known 'lovers of good eating and drinking' are left1 very generally1 to enjoy it by themselves1 and at their own expense4 ,but1 all other considerations aside1 health1 one of the most valuable of earthly possessions1 and without which all the rest are worth nothing1 bids us not only to refrain from excess in eating and drinking1 but to stop short of what might be indulged in without any apparent impropriety4 ,the words of ,,ecclesiasticus ought to be often read by young people4 ',eat modestly that which is set before thee1 and devour not1 lest thou be hated4 ,when thou sittest amongst many1 reach not thine hand out first of all4 ,how little is sufficient for a man well taught6 ,a wholesome sleep cometh of a temperate belly4 ,such a man riseth up in the morning1 and is well at ease with himself4 ,be not too hasty of meats2 for excess of meats bringeth sickness1 and choleric disease cometh of gluttony4 ,by surfeit have many perished1 and he that dieteth himself prolongeth his life4 ,show not thy valiantness in wine2 for wine hath destroyed many4' ,how true are these words6 ,how well worthy of a constant place in our memories6 ,yet1 what pains have been taken to apologize for a life contrary to these precepts6 ,and1 what punishment can be too great1 what mark of infamy sufficiently signal1 for those pernicious villains of talent1 who have employed that talent in the composition of ,bacchanalian songs2 that is to say1 pieces of fine and captivating writing in praise of one of the most odious and destructive vices in the black catalogue of human depravity6 ',who1' says the eccentric1 but laborious ,cobbett1 'what man1 ever performed a greater quantity of labor than ,i have performed8 ,now1 in a great measure1 ,i owe my capability to perform this labor to my disregard of dainties4 ,i ate1 during one whole year1 one mutton chop every day4 ,being once in town1 with one son 7then a little boy7 and a clerk1 while my family was in the country1 ,i had1 for several weeks1 nothing but legs of mutton4 ,the first day1 a leg of mutton boiled or roasted2 second1 cold2 third1 hashed2 then1 leg of mutton boiled2 and so on4 ',when ,i have been by myself1 or nearly so1 ,i have always proceeded thus3 given directions for having every day the same thing1 or alternately as above1 and every day exactly at the same hour1 so as to prevent the necessity of any talk about the matter4 ,i am certain that1 upon an average1 ,i have not1 during my life1 spent more than thirty-five minutes a day at table1 including all the meals of the day4 ,i like1 and ,i take care to have1 good and clean victuals2 but1 if wholesome and clean1 that is enough4 ,if ,i find it1 by chance1 too coarse for my appetite1 ,i put the food aside1 or let somebody do it2 and leave the appetite to gather keenness4' 99 99 99 99 99 ,now ,i have no special desire to recommend mutton chops to my readers1 nor to hold out the example of the individual whose language ,i have quoted1 as worthy of general imitation4 ,there is one lesson to be learned1 however4 ,cobbett's never tiring industry is well known4 ,and if we can rely on his own statements in regard to his manner of eating1 we see another proof that what are called 'dainties1' and even many things which are often supposed to be necessaries1 are very far from being indispensable to health or happiness4 ,i am even utterly opposed to the rapid eating of which he speaks4 ,in ,new ,england especially1 the danger is on the other side4 ',were it not from respect to others1 ,i never would wish for more than eight minutes to eat my dinner in1' said a merchant to me one day4 ,now ,i can swallow a meal at any time1 in five minutes2 but this is not eating4 ,if it is1 the teeth were made--as well as the saliva--almost in vain4 ,no6 this swallowing down a meal in five or even ten minutes1 so common among the active1 enterprising1 and industrious people of this country1 is neither healthy1 nor decent1 nor economical4 ,and instead of spending only thirty-five minutes a day in eating2 every man1 woman1 and child ought1 as a matter of duty1 to spend about twice the time in that way4 ,this would give the teeth and salivary glands an opportunity to come up to the work which ,god in nature assigned them4 ,we may indeed cheat them for a time1 but not with impunity1 for a day of reckoning will come2 and some of our rapid eaters will find their bill 7in stomach or liver complaints1 or gout or rheumatism7 rather large4 ,they will probably lose more time in this way1 than they can possibly save by eating rapidly4 ,the idea of preventing conversation about what we eat is also idle1 though ,dr4 ,franklin and many other wise men1 thought otherwise4 ,some of our students in commons and elsewhere1 suppose themselves highly meritorious because they have adopted the plan of appointing one of their number to read to the company1 while the rest are eating4 ,but they are sadly mistaken4 ,nothing is gained by the practice4 ,on the contrary1 much is lost by it4 ,the bow cannot always remain bent1 without injury4 ,neither can the mind always be kept 'toned' to a high pitch4 ,mind and body must and will have their relaxations4 ,i am not an advocate for wasting time or for eating more than is necessary4 ,nay1 ,i even believe1 on the contrary1 with most medical men1 that we generally eat about twice as much as nature requires4 ,but ,i do say1 and with emphasis1 that food must be masticated4 ,before ,i dismiss the subject of temperance1 let me beseech you to resolve to free yourselves from slavery to tea and coffee4 ,experience has taught me1 that they are injurious to health4 ,even my habits of sobriety1 moderate eating1 and early rising1 were not1 until ,i left off using them1 sufficient to give me that complete health which ,i have since had4 ,i do not undertake to prescribe for others exactly2 but1 ,i do say1 that to pour down regularly1 every day1 a quart or two of warm liquid1 whether under the name of tea1 coffee1 soup1 grog1 or any thing else1 is greatly injurious to health4 ,however1 at present1 what ,i have to represent to you1 is the great deduction which they make1 from your power of being useful1 and also from your power to husband your income1 whatever it may be1 and from whatever source arising4 ,these things cost something2 and wo to him who forgets1 or never knows1 till he pays it1 how large a bill they make--in the course of a year4 ,how much to be desired is it1 that mankind would return once more1 to the use of no other drink than that pure beverage which nature prepared for the sole drink of man6 ,so long as we are in health1 we need no other2 nay1 we have no right to any other4 ,it is the testimony of all1 or almost all whose testimony is worth having1 that water is the best known drink4 ,but if water is better than all others1 all others are1 of course1 worse than water4 ,as to food and drink generally1 let me say in conclusion1 that simplicity is the grand point to aim at4 ,water1 we have seen1 is the sole drink of man2 but there is a great variety of food provided for his sustenance4 ,he is allowed to select from this immense variety1 those kinds1 which the experience of mankind generally1 combined and compared with his own1 show to be most useful4 ,he can live on almost any thing4 ,still there is a choice to be observed1 and so far as his circumstances permit1 he is in duty bound to exercise that choice4 ,god has said by his servant ,paul2 ',whether ye eat or drink1 or whatsoever ye do1' c4 ,what we believe to be most useful to us1 though at first disagreeable1 we may soon learn to prefer4 ,our habits1 then1 should be early formed4 ,we should always remember these two rules1 however4 #ast4 ,the fewer different articles of food used at any one meal1 the better2 however excellent in their nature those may be which are left untasted4 #b4 ,never eat a moment longer than the food1 if well masticated1 actually revives and refreshes you4 ,the moment it makes you feel heavy or dull1 or palls upon the taste1 you have passed the line of safety4 ,,section ,x4 ,on ,suppers4 ,suppers1 properly so called1 are confined1 in a considerable degree1 to cities2 and ,i was at first in doubt whether ,i should do as much good by giving my voice against them1 as ,i should of mischief by spreading through the country the knowledge of a wretched practice4 ,but farther reflection has convinced me that ,i ought to offer my sentiments on this subject4 ,by suppers1 ,i mean a fourth meal1 just before going to bed4 ,individuals who have eaten quite as many times during the day as nature requires1 and who take their tea1 and perhaps a little bread and butter1 at six1 must go at nine or ten1 they think1 and eat another hearty meal4 ,some make it the most luxurious repast of the day4 ,now many of our plain country people do not know that such a practice exists4 ,they often eat too much1 it is true1 at their third meal1 but their active habits and pure air enable them to digest it better than their city brethren could4 ,besides1 their third meal never comes so late1 by several hours1 as the suppers of cities and towns4 ,our ,english ancestors1 #bjj years ago1 on both sides of the ,atlantic1 dined at eleven1 took tea early1 and had no suppers4 ,so it was with the ,jews of old1 one of the healthiest nations that ever lived beyond the ,mediterranean4 ,they knew nothing of our modern dinners at three or four1 and suppers at nine1 ten1 or eleven4 ,but not to 'take something late at night with the rest1' would at present be regarded as 'vulgar1' and who could endure it8 ,here1 ,i confess1 ,i tremble for some of my readers1 whose lot it is to be cast in the city1 lest they should1 in this single instance1 hesitate to 'take advice4' ,but ,i will hope for better things4 ,if you would give your stomach a season of repose1 as well as the rest of your system2 if you would sleep soundly1 and either dream not at all1 or have your dreams pleasant ones2 if you would rise in the morning with your head clear1 and free from pain1 and your mouth clean and sweet1 instead of being parched1 and foul2 if you would unite your voice--in spirit at least--with the voices of praise to the ,creator1 which ascend every where unless it be from the dwellings of creatures that should be men1--if1 in one word1 you would lengthen your lives several years1 and increase the enjoyment of the last thirty years #cc per cent4 without diminishing that of the first forty1 then ,i beg of you to abstain from suppers6 ,i am acquainted with one individual1 who partly from a conviction of the injury to himself1 and partly from a general detestation of the practice1 not only abstains from every thing of the kind1 but from long observation of its effects1 goes to the other extreme1 and seldom takes even a third meal4 ,and ,i know of no evil which arises from it4 ,on the contrary1 ,i believe that1 for him1 no course could be better4 ,be that as it may1 adult individuals should never eat more than three times a day1 nor should they ever partake of any food1 solid or liquid1 within three or four hours of the period of retiring to rest4 ,but if eating ordinary suppers is pernicious1 what shall we say of the practice which some indulge who aspire to be pillars in church or state1 with others of pretensions less lofty1 of going to certain eating houses1 at a very late hour1 and spending a considerable portion of the night--not in eating1 merely1 but in quaffing poisonous draughts1 and spreading noxious fumes1 and uttering language and songs which better become the inmates of ,pandemonium1 than those of the counting-house1 the college1 or the chapel6 ,if there be within the limits of any of our cities or towns1 scenes which answer to this horrid picture1 let 'it not be told in ,gath1 or published in the streets of ,askelon1' lest the fiends of the pit should rejoice2--lest the demons of darkness should triumph4 #c ,i have occasionally seen four or five persons in constant employ1 solely to supply the wants of a family of the same number1 whose health1 collectively1 required an amount of physical labor adequate to their own wants4 ,,section ,,xi4 ,on ,dress4 ,the object of dress is fourfold3 #ast4 ,it is designed as a covering2 #b;d4 ,as a means of warmth2 #c;d4 ,as a defence2 #dth4 ,to improve our appearance4 ,these purposes of dress should all be considered2 and in the order here presented4 ,that dress1 which best answers all these purposes combined1 both as respects the material and the form or fashion1 is unquestionably the best and most appropriate4 ,it is certainly true that the impressions which a person's first appearance makes upon the minds of those around him are deep and permanent1 and the subject should receive a measure of our attention1 on this account4 ,it is only a slight tax which we pay for the benefits of living in civilized society4 ,when1 however1 we sacrifice every thing else to appearance1 we commit a very great error4 ,we make that first in point of importance1 which ought to be fourth4 ,let your dress be as cheap as may be without shabbiness1 and endeavor to be neither first nor last in a fashion4 ,think more about the cleanliness1 than the gloss or texture of your clothes4 ,be always as clean as your occupation will permit2 but never for one moment believe that any human being1 who has good sense1 will love or respect you merely on account of a fine or costly coat4 ,extravagance in the haunting of play-houses1 in horses1 in every thing else1 is to be avoided1 but in young men1 extravagance in dress particularly4 ,this sort of extravagance1 this waste of money on the decoration of the body1 arises solely from vanity1 and from vanity of the most contemptible sort4 ,it arises from the notion1 that all the people in the street1 for instance1 will be looking at you1 as soon as you walk out2 and that they will1 in a greater or less degree1 think the better of you on account of your fine dress4 ,never was a notion more false4 ,many sensible people1 that happen to see you1 will think nothing at all about you3 those who are filled with the same vain notion as you are1 will perceive your attempt to impose on them1 and despise it4 ,rich people will wholly disregard you1 and you will be envied and hated by those who have the same vanity that you have1 without the means of gratifying it4 ,dress should be suited1 in some measure1 to our condition4 ,a surgeon or physician need not dress exactly like a carpenter2 but1 there is no reason why any body should dress in a very expensive manner4 ,it is a great mistake to suppose1 that they derive any advantage from exterior decoration4 ,for after all1 men are estimated by other men according to their capacity and willingness to be in some way or other useful2 and1 though1 with the foolish and vain part of women1 fine clothes frequently do something1 yet the greater part of the sex are much too penetrating to draw their conclusions solely from the outside appearance4 ,they look deeper1 and find other criterions whereby to judge4 ,even if fine clothes should obtain you a wife1 will they bring you1 in that wife1 frugality1 good sense1 and that kind of attachment which is likely to be lasting8 ,natural beauty of person is quite another thing3 this always has1 it always will and must have1 some weight even with men1 and great weight with women4 ,but1 this does not need to be set off by expensive clothes4 ,female eyes are1 in such cases1 discerning2 they can discover beauty though surrounded by rags3 and1 take this as a secret worth half a fortune to you1 that women1 however vain they may be themselves1 despise vanity in men4 ,,section ,,xii4 ,bashfulness and ,modesty4 ,dr4 ,young says1 ',the man that blushes is not quite a brute4' ,this is undoubtedly true2 yet nothing is more clear1 as ,addison has shown us1 than that a person may be both bashful and impudent4 ,i know the world commend the former quality1 and condemn the latter2 but ,i deem them both evils4 ,perhaps the latter is the greater of the two4 ,the proper medium is true modesty4 ,this is always commendable4 ,we are compelled to take the world1 in a great measure1 as it is4 ,we can hardly expect men to come and buy our wares1 unless we advertise or expose them for sale4 ,so if we would commend ourselves to the notice of our fellow men1 we must set ourselves up1--not for something which we are not2--but for what1 upon a careful examination1 we find reason to think we are4 ,many a good and valuable man has gone through this life1 without being properly estimated2 from the vain belief that true merit could not always escape unnoticed4 ,this belief1 after all1 is little else but a species of fatalism4 ,by setting ourselves up1 ,i do not mean puffing and pretending1 or putting on airs of haughtiness or arrogance2 or any affectation whatever4 ,but there are those--and some of them are persons of good sense1 in many respects1 who can scarcely answer properly1 when addressed1 or look the person with whom they are conversing in the face2 and who often render themselves ridiculous for fear they shall be so4 ,i have seen a man of respectable talents1 who1 in conversation never raised his eyes higher than the tassels of his friend's boots2 and another who could never converse without turning half or three quarters round1 so as to present his shoulder or the backside of his head1 instead of a plain1 honest face4 ,i have known young men injured by bashfulness4 ,it is vain to say that it should not be so4 ,the world is not what it should be1 in many respects2 and ,i must insist that it is our duty1 to take it as it is1 in order to make it better1 or even in order to live in it with comfort4 ,he that thinks he shall not1 most surely will not1 please4 ,a man of sense1 and knowledge of the world1 will assert his own rights1 and pursue his own purposes as steadily and uninterruptedly as the most impudent man living2 but then there is at the same time an air of modesty in all he does2 while an overbearing or impudent manner of doing the same things1 would undoubtedly have given offence4 ,hence a certain wise man has said2 ',he who knows the world will not be too bashful2 and he who knows himself will never be impudent4' ,perpetual embarrassment in company or in conversation1 is sometimes even construed into meanness4 ,avoid1--if you can do it1 without too great a sacrifice--every appearance of deserving a charge so weighty4 ,,section ,,xiii4 ,politeness and ,good-,breeding4 ,awkwardness is scarcely more tolerable than bashfulness4 ,it must proceed from one of two things2 either from not having kept good company1 or from not having derived any benefit from it4 ,many very worthy people have certain odd tricks1 and ill habits1 that excite a prejudice against them1 which it is not easy to overcome4 ,hence the importance of good-breeding4 ,now there are not a few who despise all these little things of life1 as they call them2 and yet much of their lives is taken up with them1 small as they are4 ,and since these self same little things cannot be dispensed with1 is it not better that they should be done in the easiest1 and at the same time the pleasantest manner possible8 ,there is no habit more difficult to attain1 and few so necessary to possess1 as perfect good-breeding4 ,it is equally inconsistent with a stiff formality1 an impertinent forwardness1 and an awkward bashfulness4 ,true ,christian education would seem to include it2 and yet unfortunately1 ,christians are not always polite4 ,is it not surprising that we may sometimes observe1 in mere men of the world1 that kind of carriage which should naturally be expected from an individual thoroughly imbued with the spirit of ,christianity1 while his very neighbors1 who are professing ,christians1 appear1 by their conduct1 to be destitute of such a spirit8 ,which1 then1 in practice 7,i mean so far as this fact is concerned7 are the best ,christians8 ,but ,i know what will be the answer2 and ,i know that these things ought not so to be4 ,no good reason can be given why a ,christian should not be as well-bred as his neighbor4 ,it is difficult to conceive how a person can follow the rules given in the ,sermon on the ,mount1 without being1 and showing himself to be1 well-bred4 ,i have even known men who were no friends to the bible1 to declare it as their unequivocal belief that he whose life should conform to the principles of that sermon1 could not avoid being truly polite4 ,there are not a few who confound good-breeding with affectation1 just as they confound a reasonable attention to dress with foppery4 ,this calling things by wrong names is very common1 how much soever it may be lamented4 ,good-breeding1 or true politeness1 is the art of showing men1 by external signs1 the internal regard we have for them4 ,it arises from good sense1 improved by good company4 ,good-breeding is never to be learned1 though it may be improved1 by the study of books2 and therefore they who attempt it1 appear stiff and pedantic4 ,the really well-bred1 as they become so by use and observation1 are not liable to affectation4 ,you see good-breeding in all they do1 without seeing the art of it4 ,like other habits1 it is acquired by practice4 ,an engaging manner and genteel address may be out of our power1 although it is a misfortune that it should be so4 ,but it is in the power of every body to be kind1 condescending1 and affable4 ,it is in the power of every person who has any thing to say to a fellow being1 to say it with kind feelings1 and with a sincere desire to please2 and this1 whenever it is done1 will atone for much awkwardness in the manner of expression4 ,forced complaisance is foppery2 and affected easiness is ridiculous4 ,good-breeding is1 and ought to be1 an amiable and persuasive thing2 it beautifies the actions and even the looks of men4 ,but the grimace of good-breeding is not less odious4 ,in short1 good-breeding is a forgetting of ourselves so far as to seek what may be agreeable to others1 but in so artless and delicate a manner as will scarcely allow them to perceive that we are so employed2 and the regarding of ourselves1 not as the centre of motion on which every thing else is to revolve1 but only as one of the wheels or parts1 in a vast machine1 embracing other wheels and parts of equal1 and perhaps more than equal importance4 ,it is hence utterly opposed to selfishness1 vanity1 or pride4 ,nor is it proportioned to the supposed riches and rank of him whose favor and patronage you would gladly cultivate2 but extends to all4 ,it knows how to contradict with respect2 and to please1 without adulation4 ,the following are a few plain directions for attaining the character of a well-bred man4 #a4 ,never weary your company by talking too long1 or too frequently4 #b4 ,always look people in the face when you address them1 and generally when they are speaking to you4 #c4 ,attend to a person who is addressing you4 ,inattention marks a trifling mind1 and is a most unpardonable piece of rudeness4 ,it is even an affront2 for it is the same thing as saying that his remarks are not worth your attention4 #d4 ,do not interrupt the person who is speaking by saying yes1 or no1 or hem1 at every sentence2 it is the most useless thing that can be4 ,an occasional assent1 either by word or action1 may be well enough2 but even a nod of assent is sometimes repeated till it becomes disgusting4 #e4 ,remember that every person in a company likes to be the hero of that company4 ,never1 therefore1 engross the whole conversation to yourself4 #f4 ,learn to sit or stand still1 while another is speaking to you4 ,you will not of course be so rude as to dig in the earth with your feet1 or take your penknife from your pocket and pair your nails2 but there are a great many other little movements which are scarcely less clownish4 #g4 ,never anticipate for another1 or help him out1 as it is called4 ,this is quite a rude affair1 and should ever be avoided4 ,let him conclude his story for himself4 ,it is time enough for you to make corrections or additions afterward1 if you deem his account defective4 ,it is also a piece of impoliteness to interrupt another in his remarks4 #h4 ,say as little of yourself and your friends as possible4 #i4 ,make it a rule never to accuse1 without due consideration1 any body or association of men4 #aj4 ,never try to appear more wise or learned than the rest of the company4 ,not that you should affect ignorance2 but endeavor to remain within your own proper sphere4 ,,section ,,xiv4 ,personal ,habits4 ,i have elsewhere spoken of the importance of early rising4 ,let me merely request you1 in this place1 to form a habit of this kind1 from which no ordinary circumstances shall suffer you to depart4 ,your first object after rising and devotion1 should be to take a survey of the business which lies before you during the day1 making of course a suitable allowance for exigencies4 ,i have seldom known a man in business thrive--and men of business we all ought to be1 whatever may be our occupation--who did not rise early in the morning1 and plan his work for the day4 ,some of those who have been most successful1 made it a point to have this done before daylight4 ,indeed1 ,i was intimately acquainted with one man who laid out the business of the day1 attended family worship1 and breakfasted before sunrise2 and this too1 at all seasons of the year4 ,morning gowns and slippers are very useful things1 it is said4 ,but the reasons given for their utility are equally in favor of always wearing them4 ',they are loose and comfortable4' ,very well3 ,should not our dress always be loose8 ',they save other clothes4' ,then why not wear them all day long8 ,the truth1 after all1 is1 that they are fashionable1 and as we usually give the true reason for a thing last1 this is probably the principal reason why they are so much in use4 ,i am pretty well convinced1 however1 that they are of little real use to him who is determined to eat his bread 'in the sweat of his face1' according to the ,divine appointment4 ,looking-glasses are useful in their place1 but like many other conveniences of life1 by no means indispensable2 and so much abused1 that a man of sense would almost be tempted1 for the sake of example1 to lay them aside4 ,of all wasted time1 none is more foolishly wasted than that which is employed in unnecessary looking at one's own pretty face4 ,this may seem a matter of small consequence2 but nothing can be of small importance to which we are obliged to attend every day4 ,if we dressed or shaved but once a year1 or once a month1 the case would be altered2 but this is a piece of work that must be done once every day2 and1 as it may cost only about five minutes of time1 and may be1 and frequently is1 made to cost thirty1 or even fifty minutes2 and1 as only fifteen minutes make about a fiftieth part of the hours of our average daylight2 this being the case1 it is a matter of real importance4 ,,sir ,,john ,,sinclair asked a friend whether he meant to have a son of his 7then a little boy7 taught ,latin8 ',no1' said he1 'but ,i mean to do something a great deal better for him4' ',what is that8' said ,sir ,john4 ',why1' said the other1 ',i mean to teach him to shave with cold water1 and without a glass4' ,my readers may smile1 but ,i can assure them that ,sir ,john is not alone4 ,there are many others who have adopted this practice1 and found it highly beneficial4 ,one individual1 who had tried it for years1 has the following spirited remarks on the subject4 ',only think of the inconvenience attending the common practice6 ,there must be hot water2 to have this there must be a fire1 and1 in some cases1 a fire for that purpose alone2 to have these1 there must be a servant1 or you must light a fire yourself4 ,for the want of these1 the job is put off until a later hour3 this causes a stripping and another dressing bout3 or1 you go in a slovenly state all that day1 and the next day the thing must be done1 or cleanliness must be abandoned altogether4 ,if you are on a journey1 you must wait the pleasure of the servants at the inn before you can dress and set out in the morning2 the pleasant time for travelling is gone before you can move from the spot3 instead of being at the end of your day's journey in good time1 you are benighted1 and have to endure all the great inconveniences attendant on tardy movements4 ,and all this from the apparently insignificant affair of shaving4 ,how many a piece of important business has failed from a short delay6 ,and how many thousand of such delays daily proceed from this unworthy cause6' ,these remarks are especially important to those persons in boarding-houses and elsewhere1 for whom hot water1 if they use it1 must be expressly prepared4 ,let me urge you never to say ,i cannot go1 or do such a thing1 till ,i am shaved or dressed4 ,take care always to ,,be shaved and dressed1 and then you will always be ready to act4 ,but to this end the habit must be formed in early life1 and pertinaciously adhered to4 ,there are those who can truly say that to the habit of adhering to the principles which have been laid down1 they owe much of their success in life2 that however sober1 discreet1 and abstinent they might have been1 they never could have accomplished much without it4 ,we should suppose by reasoning beforehand1 that the army could not be very favorable to steady habits of this or any other kind2 yet the following is the testimony of one who had made the trial4 ',to the habit of early rising and husbanding my time well1 more than to any other thing1 ,i owed my very extraordinary promotion in the army4 ,i was always ready4 ,if ,i had to mount guard at ten1 ,i was ready at nine3 never did any man1 or any thing1 wait one moment for me4 ,being1 at an age under twenty years1 raised from corporal to sergeant major at once1 over the heads of thirty sergeants1 ,i should naturally have been an object of envy and hatred2 but this habit of early rising really subdued these passions4 ',before my promotion1 a clerk was wanted to make out the morning report of the regiment4 ,i rendered the clerk unnecessary2 and1 long before any other man was dressed for the parade1 my work for the morning was all done1 and ,i myself was on the parade ground1 walking1 in fine weather1 for an hour perhaps4 ',my custom was this3 to get up1 in summer1 at daylight1 and in winter at four o'clock2 shave1 dress1 even to the putting of my sword-belt over my shoulder1 and having my sword lying on the table before me1 ready to hang by my side4 ,then ,i ate a bit of cheese1 or pork1 and bread4 ,then ,i prepared my report1 which was filled up as fast as the companies brought me in the materials4 ,after this1 ,i had an hour or two to read1 before the time came for any duty out of doors1 unless when the regiment1 or part of it1 went out to exercise in the morning4 ,when this was the case1 and the matter was left to me1 ,i always had it on the ground in such time as that the bayonets glistened in the rising sun2 a sight which gave me delight1 of which ,i often think1 but which ,i should in vain endeavor to describe4 ',if the officers were to go out1 eight or ten o'clock was the hour4 ,sweating men in the heat of the day1 or breaking in upon the time for cooking their dinner1 puts all things out of order1 and all men out of humor4 ,when ,i was commander1 the men had a long day of leisure before them3 they could ramble into the town or into the woods2 go to get raspberries1 to catch birds1 to catch fish1 or to pursue any other recreation1 and such of them as chose1 and were qualified1 to work at their trades4 ,so that here1 arising solely from the early habits of one very young man1 were pleasant and happy days given to hundreds4' ,for my own part1 ,i confess that only a few years since1 ,i should have laughed heartily at some of these views1 especially the cold water system of shaving4 ,but a friend whom ,i esteemed1 and who shaved with cold water1 said so much in its favor that ,i ventured to make the trial2 and ,i can truly say that ,i would not return to my former slavery to hot water1 if ,i had a servant who had nothing else to do but furnish it4 ,i cannot indeed say with a recent writer 7,i think in the ,journal of ,health7 that cold water is a great deal better than warm2 but ,i can and do say that it makes little if any difference with me which ,i use2 though on going out into the cold air immediately afterward1 the skin is more likely to chap after the use of warm water than cold4 ,besides ,i think the use of warm water more likely to produce eruptions on the skin4--,sometimes1 though not generally1 ,i shave1 like ,sir ,john ,sinclair1 without a glass2 but ,i would never be enslaved to one1 convenient as it is4 ,,section ,,xv4 ,bathing and ,cleanliness4 ,cleanliness of the body has1 some how or other1 such a connection with mental and moral purity1 7whether as cause or effect--or both--,i will not undertake now to determine7 that ,i am unwilling to omit the present opportunity of urging its importance4 ,there are those who are so attentive to this subject as to wash their whole bodies in water1 either cold or warm1 every day of the year2 and never to wear the same clothes1 during the day1 that they have slept in the previous night4 ,now this habit may by some be called whimsical2 but ,i think it deserves a better name4 ,i consider this extreme1 if it ought to be called an extreme1 as vastly more safe than the common extreme of neglect4 ,is it not shameful--would it not be1 were human duty properly understood--to pass months1 and even years1 without washing the whole body once8 ,there are thousands and tens of thousands of both sexes1 who are exceedingly nice1 even to fastidiousness1 about externals2--who1 like those mentioned in the gospel1 keep clean the 'outside of the cup and the platter1'--but alas6 how is it within8 ,not a few of us1--living1 as we do1 in a land where soap and water are abundant and cheap--would blush1 if the whole story were told4 ,this chapter1 if extended so far as to embrace the whole subject of cleanliness of person1 dress1 and apartments1 and cold and warm bathing1 would alone fill a volume2 a volume too1 which1 if well prepared1 would be of great value1 especially to all young men4 ,but my present limits do not permit of any thing farther4 ,in regard to cold bathing1 however1 allow me to refer you to two articles in the third volume of the ,annals of ,education1 pages #cae and #cdd1 which contain the best directions ,i can give on this subject4 ,,section ,,xvi4 ,on ,little ,things4 ,there are many things which1 viewed without any reference to prevailing habits1 manners1 and customs1 appear utterly unworthy of attention2 and yet1 after all1 much of our happiness will be found to depend upon them4 ,we are to remember that we live--not alone1 on the earth--but among a multitude1 each of whom claims1 and is entitled to his own estimate of things4 ,now it often happens that what we deem a little thing1 another1 who views the subject differently1 will regard as a matter of importance4 ,among the items to which ,i refer1 are many of the customary salutations and civilities of life2 and the modes of dress4 ,now it is perfectly obvious that many common phrases which are used at meeting and separating1 during the ordinary interviews and concerns of life1 as well as in correspondence1 are in themselves wholly unmeaning4 ,but viewed as an introduction to things of more importance1 these little words and phrases at the opening of a conversation1 and as the language of hourly and daily salutation1 are certainly useful4 ,they are indications of good and friendly feeling2 and without them we should not1 and could not1 secure the confidence of some of those among whom we are obliged to live4 ,they would regard us as not only unsocial1 but selfish2 and not only selfish1 but proud or misanthropic4 ,on account of meeting with much that disgusts us1 many are tempted to avoid society generally4 ,the frivolous conversation1 and still more frivolous conduct1 which they meet with1 they regard as a waste of time1 and perhaps even deem it a duty to resign themselves to solitude4 ,this1 however1 is a great mistake4 ,those who have been most useful to mankind acted very differently4 ,they mingled with the world1 in hopes to do something towards reforming it4 ,the greatest of philosophers1 as well as of ,christians2--even the ,,founder of ,christianity himself--sat down1 and not only sat down1 but ate and drank in the society of those with whose manners1 and especially whose vices1 he could have had no possible sympathy4 ,zimmerman1 who has generally been regarded as an apostle of solitude1 taught that men ought not to 'reside in deserts1 or sleep1 like owls1 in the hollow trunks of trees4' ',i sincerely exhort my disciples1' says he1 'not to absent themselves morosely from public places1 nor to avoid the social throng2 which cannot fail to afford to judicious1 rational1 and feeling minds1 many subjects both of amusement and instruction4 ,it is true1 that we cannot relish the pleasures and taste the advantages of society1 without being able to give a patient hearing to the tongue of folly1 to excuse error1 and to bear with infirmity4' ,in like manner1 we are not to disregard wholly1 our dress4 ,it is true that the shape of a hat1 or the cut of a coat may not add to the strength of the mind1 or the soundness of the morals2 but it is also true that people form an opinion often from our exterior appearance2 and will continue to do so3 and first impressions are very difficult to be overcome4 ,if we regard our own usefulness1 therefore1 we shall not consider the fashion or character of our dress as a little thing in its results4 ,i have said elsewhere that we ought neither to be the first nor the last in a fashion4 ,we should remember1 also1 that the world1 in its various parts and aspects1 is made up of little things4 ,so true is this1 that ,i have sometimes been very fond of the paradoxical remark1 that 'little things are great things2' that is1 in their results4 ,for who does not know that throughout the physical world1 the mightiest results are brought about by the silent working of small causes8 ,it is not the tornado1 or the deluge1 or even the occasional storm of rain1 that renews and animates nature1 so much as the gentle breeze1 the soft refreshing shower1 and the still softer and gentler dews of heaven4 ,so in human life1 generally1 they are the little things often1 that produce the mightier results4 ,it is he who takes care of pence and farthings1 not he who neglects them1 that thrives4 ,it is he alone who guards his lips against the first improper word1--trifling as it may seem--that is secure against future profanity4 ,he who indulges one little draught of alcoholic drink1 is in danger of ending a tippler2 he who gives loose to one impure thought1 of ending the victim of lust and sensuality4 ,nor is it one single gross1 or as it were accidental act1 viewed as insulated from the rest--however injurious it may be--that injures the body1 or debases the mind1 so much as the frequent repetition of those smaller errors1 whose habitual occurrence goes to establish the predominating choice of the mind1 or affection of the soul4 ,avoid then1 the pernicious1 the fatal error1 that little things are of no consequence3 little sums of money1 little fragments of time1 little or trifling words1 little or apparently unimportant actions4 ,on this subject ,i cannot help adopting--and feeling its force too1--the language of a friend of temperance in regard to those who think themselves perfectly secure from danger1 and are believers in the harmlessness of little things4 ',i tremble1' said he1 'for the man that does not tremble for himself4' ,,section ,,xvii4 ,of ,anger1 and the means of restraining it4 ,there is doubtless much difference of native temperament4 ,one person is easily excited1 another1 more slowly4 ,but there is a greater difference still1 resulting from our habits4 ,if we find ourselves easily led into anger1 we should be extremely careful how we indulge the first steps that lead towards it4 ,those who naturally possess a mild temper may1 with considerable safety1 do and say many things which others cannot4 ,thus we often say of a person who has met with a misfortune1 ',it is good enough for him2' or of a criminal who has just been condemned to suffer punishment1 ',no matter2 he deserves it4' ,or perhaps we go farther1 and on finding him acquitted1 say1 ',he ought to have been hanged1 and even hanging was too good for him4' ,now all these things1 in the mouths of the irritable1 lead the way to an indulgence of anger1 however unperceived may be the transition4 ,it is on this principle that the saying of ,st4 ,john is so strikingly true2 ',he that hateth his brother is a murderer2' that is1 he that indulges hatred has the seeds within him1 not only of out-breaking anger1 but of murder4 ,it is on this account that ,i regret the common course taken with children in relation to certain smaller tribes of the animal creation4 ,they are allowed not only to destroy them1--7which is doubtless often a duty17 but to destroy them in anger2 to indulge a permanent hatred towards them2 and to think this hatred creditable and scriptural4 ,when such feelings lead us to destroy even the most troublesome or disgusting reptiles or insects in anger1 we have so far prepared the way for the indulgence of anger towards our fellow creatures1 whenever their conduct shall excite our displeasure4 ,we can hence see why he who has a violent temper should always speak in a low voice1 and study mildness and sweetness in his tones4 ,for loud1 impassioned1 and boisterous tones certainly excite impassioned feelings4 ,so do all the actions which indicate anger4 ,thus ,dr4 ,darwin has said that any individual1 by using the language and actions of an angry person1 towards an imaginary object of displeasure1 and accompanying them by threats1 and blows1 with a doubled or clinched fist1 may easily work himself into a rage4 ,of the justice of this opinion ,i am fully convinced1 from actual and repeated experiments4 ,if we find ourselves apt to be angry1 we should endeavor to avoid the road which leads to it4 ,the first thing to be done1 is to govern our voice4 ,on this point1 the story of the ,quaker and the merchant may not be uninstructive4 ,a merchant in ,london had a dispute with a ,quaker gentleman about the settlement of an account4 ,the merchant was determined to bring the action into court1--a course of proceeding to which the ,quaker was wholly opposed2--he therefore used every argument in his power to convince the merchant of his error2 but all to no purpose4 ,desirous of making a final effort1 however1 the ,quaker called at the house of the merchant1 one morning1 and inquired of the servant if his master was at home4 ,the merchant hearing the inquiry from the top of the stairs1 and knowing the voice1 called out1 loudly1 ',tell that rascal ,i am not at home4' ,the ,quaker1 looking up towards him1 said calmly2 ',well1 friend1 may ,god put thee in a better mind4' ,the merchant was struck with the meekness of the reply1 and after thinking more deliberately of the matter1 became convinced that the ,quaker was right1 and he in the wrong4 ,he requested to see him1 and after acknowledging his error1 said1 ',i have one question to ask you4 ,how were you able to bear my abuse with so much patience8' ',friend1' replied the ,quaker1 ',i will tell thee4 ,i was naturally as hot and violent as thou art4 ,but ,i knew that to indulge my temper was sinful1 and also very foolish4 ,i observed that men in a passion always spoke very loud2 and ,i thought if ,i could control my voice1 ,i should keep down my passions4 ,i therefore made it a rule never to let it rise above a certain key2 and by a careful observance of this rule1 ,i have1 with the blessing of ,god1 entirely mastered my natural temper4' ,when you are tempted by the conduct of those around you1 to be angry1 endeavor to consider the matter for a few moments4 ,if your temper be so impetuous that you find this highly difficult1 you may adopt some plan or device for gaining time4 ,some recommend counting twenty or thirty1 deliberately4 ,the following anecdote of the celebrated ,zimmerman is exactly in point1 and may afford useful hints for instruction4 ,owing in part to a diseased state of body1 ,zimmerman was sometimes irritable4 ,one day1 a ,russian princess and several other ladies entered his apartment to inquire after his health2 when1 in a fit of petulance1 he rose1 and requested them to leave the room4 ,the prince entered some time afterward1 when ,zimmerman had begun to repent of his rashness1 and after some intervening conversation1 advised him1 whenever he felt a disposition to treat his friends so uncivilly again1 to repeat1 mentally1 the ,lord's prayer4 ,this advice was followed1 and with success4 ,not long afterward the same prince came to him for advice in regard to the best manner of controlling the violence of those transports of affection towards his young and amiable consort1 in which young and happy lovers are so apt to indulge4 ',my dear friend1' said ,zimmerman1 'there is no expedient which can surpass your own4 ,whenever you feel yourself overborne by passion1 you have only to repeat the ,lord's prayer1 and you will be able to reduce it to a steady and permanent flame4' ,by adopting ,zimmerman's rule1 we shall1 as ,i have already observed1 gain time for reflection1 than which nothing more is needed4 ,for if the cause of anger be a report1 for example1 of injury done to us by an absent person1 either in words or deeds1 how do we know the report is true8 ,or it may be only partly true2 and how do we know1 till we consider the matter well1 whether it is worth our anger at all8 ,or if at all1 perhaps it deserves but a little of it4 ,it may be1 too1 that the person who said or did the thing reported1 did it by mistake1 or is already sorry for it4 ,at all events1 nothing can be gained by haste2 much may be by delay4 ,if a passionate person give you ill language1 you ought rather to pity than be angry with him1 for anger is a species of disease4 ,and to correct one evil1 will you make another8 ,if his being angry is an evil1 will it mend the matter to make another evil1 by indulging in passion yourself8 ,will it cure his disease1 to throw yourself into the same distemper8 ,but if not1 then how foolish is it to indulge improper feelings at all6 ,on the same principles1 and for the same reasons1 you should avoid returning railing for railing2 or reviling for reproach4 ,it only kindles the more heat4 ,besides1 you will often find silence1 or at least very gentle words1 as in the case of the ,quaker just mentioned1 the best return for reproaches which could be devised4 ,i say the best 'return2' but ,i would not be understood as justifying any species of revenge4 ,the kind of return here spoken of is precisely that treatment which will be most likely to cure the distemper in the other1 by making him see1 and be sorry for1 his passion4 ,if the views taken in this section be true1 it is easy to see the consummate folly of all violence1 whether between individuals or collective bodies1 whether it be by striking1 duelling1 or war4 ,for if an individual or a nation has done wrong1 will it annihilate that wrong to counteract it by another wrong8 ,is it not obvious that it only makes two evils1 where but one existed before8 ,and can two wrongs ever make one right action8 ,which is the most rational1 when the choice is in our power1 to add to one existing evil1 another of similar or greater magnitude2 or to keep quiet1 and let the world have but one cup of misery instead of two8 ,besides1 the language of ,scripture is every where full and decided on this point4 ',recompense to no man evil for evil1' and 'wo to him by whom the offence cometh1' though found but once or twice in just so many words1 are in fact1 some of the more prominent doctrines of the ,new ,testament2 and ,i very much doubt whether you can read many pages1 in succession1 in any part of the bible1 without finding this great principle enforced4 ,the daily example of the ,saviour1 and the apostles and early ,christians1 is a full confirmation of it1 in practice4 ,,chapter ,,ii4 ,on the ,management of ,business4 ,,section ,i4 ,on commencing ,business4 ,young men are usually in haste to commence business for themselves4 ,this is an evil1 and one which appears to me to be increasing4 ,let me caution my readers to be on their guard against it4 ,the evils of running in debt will be adverted to elsewhere4 ,i mention the subject in this place1 because the earlier you commence business1 the greater the necessity of resorting to credit4 ,you may1 indeed1 in some employments1 begin on a very small scale2 but this is attended with serious disadvantages1 especially at the present day1 when you must meet with so much competition4 ,perhaps a few may be furnished with capital by their friends1 or by inheritance4 ,in the latter case they may as well use their money1 if they receive it2 but ,i have already endeavored to show that it is generally for the interest of young men to rely upon their own exertions4 ,it is extremely difficult for a person who has ever relied on others1 to act with the same energy as those who have been thrown upon their own resources4#d ,to learn the art of inheriting property or receiving large gifts1 and of acting with the same energy as if left wholly to our own resources1 must be reserved1 ,i believe1 for future and wiser generations of our race4 ,i repeat it1 therefore1 every person had better defer going into business for himself1 until he can stand entirely on his own footing4 ,is it asked how he can have funds from his own resources1 before he has actually commenced business for himself8 ,why the thing is perfectly easy4 ,he has only to labor a few years in the service of another4 ,true it is1 he may receive but moderate wages during this time2 but on the other hand1 he will be subjected to little or no risk4 ,let #a1jjj young men1 at the age of #cj years1 enter into business with a given amount of capital1 all acquired by their own hard earnings1 and let them pursue their business #cj years faithfully2 that is1 till they are #fj years of age4 ,let #a1jjj others commence at the age of #bj1 with three times the amount of capital possessed by the former1 but at the same time either inherited1 or loaned by their friends1 and let them pursue their calling till they are #fj years of age2 or for a period of #dj years4 ,we will suppose the natural talents1 capacity for doing business1 and expenditures--in fact every thing1--the same1 in both cases4 ,now it requires no gift of prophecy to foretell1 with certainty1 that at #fj years of age a far greater proportion of the #a1jjj1 who began at #cj and depended solely on their own exertions1 will be men of wealth1 than of those who began at #bj with three times their capital4 ,the reason of these results is found in the very nature of things1 as ,i have shown both above1 and in my remarks on industry4 ,but these views are borne out by facts4 ,go into any city in the ,united ,states1 and learn the history of the men who are engaged in active and profitable business1 and are thriving in the world1 and my word for it1 you will find the far greater part began life with nothing1 and have had no resources whatever but their own head and hands4 ,and in no city is this fact more strikingly verified than in ,boston4 ,on the other hand1 if you make a list of those who fail in business from year to year1 and learn their history1 you will find that a very large proportion of them relied on inheritances1 credit1 or some kind of foreign aid in early life2--and not a few begun very young4 ,there is no doctrine in this volume1 which will be more unpopular with its readers1 than this4 ,not a few will1 ,i fear1 utterly disbelieve it4 ,they look at the exterior appearance of some young friend1 a little older than themselves1 who has been lifted into business and gone on a year or two1 and all appears fair and encouraging4 ,they long to imitate him4 ,point them to a dozen others who have gone only a little farther1 and have made shipwreck1 and it weighs nothing or next to nothing with them4 ,they suspect mismanagement1 7which doubtless sometimes exists7 and think they shall act more wisely4 ,in almost every considerable shop in this country may be found young men who have nearly served out their time as apprentices1 or perhaps have gone a little farther1 even1 and worked a year or two as journeymen4 ,they have been industrious and frugal1 and have saved a few hundred dollars4 ,this1 on the known principles of human nature1 has created a strong desire to make additions2 and the desire has increased in a greater ratio than the sum4 ,they are good workmen1 perhaps1 or if not1 they generally think so2 and those who have the least merit1 generally have the most confidence in themselves4 ,but if there be one who has merit1 there is usually in the neighborhood some hawk-eyed money dealer1 who knows that he cannot better invest his funds than in the hands of active young men4 ,this man will search him out1 and offer to set him up in business2 and his friends1 pleased to have him noticed1 give security for payment4 ,thus flattered1 he commonly begins2 and after long patience and perseverance1 he may1 by chance1 succeed4 ,but a much greater number are unsuccessful1 and a few drown their cares and perplexities in the poisoned bowl1 or in debauchery2--perhaps both--thus destroying their minds and souls2 or1 it may be1 abruptly putting an end to their own existence4 ,young men are apt to reason thus with themselves4 ',i am now arrived at an age when others have commenced business and succeeded4 ,it is true ,i may not succeed2 but ,i know of no reason why my prospects are not as good as those of ,a1 ,b1 and ,c1 to say the least4 ,i am certainly as good a workman1 and know as well how to manage1 and attend to my own concerns1 without intermeddling with those of others4 ,it is true my friends advise me to work as a journeyman a few years longer2 but it is a hard way of living4 ,besides1 what shall ,i learn all this while1 that ,i do not already know8 ,they say ,i shall be improving in the practical part of my business1 if not in the theory of it4 ,but shall ,i not improve while ,i work for myself8 ,suppose ,i make blunders4 ,have not others done the same8 ,if ,i fall1 ,i must get up again4 ,perhaps it will teach me not to stumble again4 ,the fact is1 old people never think the young know or can do any thing till they are forty years old4 ,i am determined to make an effort4 ,a good opportunity offers1 and such a one may never again occur4 ,i am confident ,i shall succeed4' ,how often have ,i heard this train of reasoning pursued6 ,but if it were correct1 how happens it that those facts exist which have just been mentioned8 ,more than this2 why do almost all men assert gratuitously after they have spent twenty years in their avocation1 that although they thought themselves wise when they began their profession1 they were exceedingly ignorant8 ,who ever met with a man that did not feel this ignorance more sensibly after twenty years of experience1 than when he first commenced8 ,this self flattery and self confidence--this ambition to be men of business and begin to figure in the world1--is not confined to any particular occupation or profession of men1 but is found in all4 ,nor is it confined to those whose object in life is pecuniary emolument4 ,it is perhaps equally common among those who seek their happiness in ameliorating the condition of mankind by legislating for them1 settling their quarrels1 soothing their passions1 or curing the maladies of their souls and bodies4 ,perhaps the evil is not more glaring in any class of the community than in the medical profession4 ,there is a strong temptation to this1 in the facility with which licenses and diplomas may be obtained4 ,any young man who has common sense1 if he can read and write tolerably1 may in some of the ,states1 become a knight of the lancet in three years1 and follow another employment a considerable part of the time besides4 ,he has only to devote some of his extra hours to the study of anatomy1 surgery1 and medicine1 recite occasionally to a practitioner1 as ignorant1 almost1 as himself2 hear one series of medical lectures2 and procure certificates that he has studied medicine 'three years1' including the time of the lectures2 and he will be licensed1 almost of course4 ,then he sallies forth to commit depredations on society at discretion2 and how many he kills is unknown4 ',i take it for granted1 however1' said a ,president of a ,college1 three years ago1 who understood this matter pretty well1 'that every half-educated young physician1 who succeeds at last in getting a reputable share of practice1 must have rid the world1 rather prematurely1 of some dozen or twenty individuals1 at the least1 in order to qualify himself for the profession4' ,the evil is scarcely more tolerable1 as regards young ministers1 except that the community in general have better means of knowing when they are imposed upon by ignorance or quackery in this matter1 than in most other professions4 ,the principal book for a student of theology is in the hands of every individual1 and he is taught to read and understand it4 ,the great evil which arises to students of divinity themselves from entering their profession too early1 is the loss of health4 ,neither the minds nor the bodies of young men are equal to the responsibilities of this1 or indeed of any other profession or occupation1 at #bj1 and rarely at #be4 ,nothing is more evident than that young men1 generally1 are losers in the end1 both in a pecuniary point of view and in regard to health1 by commencing business before #cj years of age4 ,but this ,i have already attempted to show4 ,as regards candidates for the ministry1 several eminent divines are beginning to inculcate the opinion1 with great earnestness1 that to enter fully upon the active duties of this laborious vocation before the age ,i have mentioned1 is injurious to themselves and to the cause they wish to promote--the cause of ,god4 ,and ,i hope their voices will be raised louder and louder on this topic1 till the note of remonstrance reaches the most distant villages of our country4 ,it has often occurred to me that every modest young man1 whatever may be his destination1 might learn wisdom from consulting the history of the ,,young ,,man ,,of ,,nazareth as well as of the illustrious reformer who prepared the way for him4#e ,our young men1 since newspapers have become so common1 are apt to think themselves thoroughly versed in law1 politics1 divinity1 c42 and are not backward to exhibit their talents4 ,but who is abler at disputation than ,,he who at twelve years of age proved a match for the learned doctors of law at ,jerusalem8 ,did he1 whose mind was so mature at twelve1 enter upon the duties of his ministry 7a task more arduous than has ever fallen to the lot of any human being7 at #ah or #bj years of age8 ,but why not1 when he had so much to do8--,or did he wait till he was in his #cjth year8 ,the great question with every young man should not be1 ,when can ,i get such assistance as will enable me to commence business2--but1 ,am ,i well qualified to commence8 ,perfect in his profession1 absolutely so1 no man ever will be2 but a measure of perfection which is rarely if ever attained under #cj years of age1 is most certainly demanded4 ,to learn the simplest handicraft employment in some countries1 a person must serve an apprenticeship of at least seven years4 ,here1 in ,america1 half that time is thought by many young men an intolerable burden1 and they long to throw it off4 ,they wish for what they call a better order of things4 ,the consequences of this feeling1 and a growing spirit of insubordination1 are every year becoming more and more deplorable4 #d ,this fact1 so obvious to every student of human nature1 has sometimes given rise to an opinion that orphans make their way best in the world4 ,so far as the business of making money is concerned1 ,i am not sure but it is so4 #e ,even ,timothy--young ,timothy as he has been often called--was probably in his #cjth year when he was ordained4 ,,section ,,ii4 ,importance of ,integrity4 ,every one will admit the importance of integrity in all his dealings1 for however dishonest he may be himself1 he cannot avoid perceiving the necessity of integrity in others4 ,no society could exist were it not for the measure of this virtue which remains4 ,without a degree of confidence1 in transacting business with each other1 even the savage life would be a thousand times more savage than it now is4 ,without it1 a gang of thieves or robbers could not long hold together4 ,but while all admit the sterling importance of strict integrity1 how few practise it6 ,let me prevail when ,i entreat the young not to hazard either their reputation or peace of mind for the uncertain advantages to be derived from unfair dealing4 ,it is madness1 especially in one who is just beginning the world4 ,it would be so1 if by a single unfair act he could get a fortune2 leaving the loss of the soul out of the question4 ,for if a trader1 for example1 is once generally known to be guilty of fraud1 or even of taking exorbitant profits1 there is an end to his reputation4 ,bad as the world is1 there is some respect paid to integrity1 and wo be to him who forgets it4 ,if a person habitually allows himself in a single act not sanctioned by the great and golden rule of loving others as we do ourselves1 he has entered a road whose everlasting progress is downward4 ,fraudulent in one point1 he will soon be so in another--and another2 and so on to the end of the chapter1 if there be any end to it4 ,at least no one who has gone a step in the downward road1 can assure himself that this will not be the dreadful result4 ,an honest bargain is that only in which the fair market price or value of a commodity is mutually allowed1 so far as this is known4 ,the market price is usually1 the equitable price of a thing4 ,it will be the object of every honest man to render1 in all cases1 an equivalent for what he receives4 ,where the market price cannot be known1 each of the parties to an honest contract will endeavor to come as near it as possible2 keeping in mind the rule of doing to others as they would desire others to do to them in similar circumstances4 ,every bargain not formed on these principles is1 in its results1 unjust2 and if intentional1 is fraudulent4 ,there are a great many varieties of this species of fraud4 #a4 ,concealing the market price4 ,how many do this2 and thus buy for less1 and sell for more than a fair valuation6 ,why so many practise this kind of fraud1 and insist at the same time that it is no fraud at all1 is absolutely inconceivable1 except on the supposition that they are blinded by avarice4 ,for they perfectly know that their customers would not deal with them at any other than market prices1 except from sheer ignorance2 and that the advantage which they gain1 is gained by misapprehension of the real value of the commodities4 ,but can an honest man take this advantage8 ,would he take it of a child8 ,or if he did1 would not persons of common sense despise him for it8 ,but why not as well take advantage of a child as of a man8 ,because1 it may be answered1 the child does not know the worth of what he buys or sells2 but the man does1 or might4 ,but in the case specified1 it is evident he does not know it1 if he did he would not make the bargain4 ,and for proof that such conduct is downright fraud1 the person who commits it1 has only to ask himself whether he would be willing others should take a similar advantage of his ignorance4 ',i do as ,i agree1' is often the best excuse such men can make1 when reasoned with on the injustice of their conduct1 without deciding the question1 whether their agreement is founded on a desire to do right4 #b4 ,others misrepresent the market price4 ,this is done in various ways4 ,they heard somebody say the price in market was so or so2 or such a one bought at such or such a price1 or another sold at such a price3 all of which prices1 purchases1 and sales are known positively to be different from those which generally prevail4 ,many contrive to satisfy their consciences in this way1 who would by no means venture at once upon plain and palpable lying4 #c4 ,the selling of goods or property which is unsound and defective1 under direct professions that it is sound and good1 is another variety of this species of fraud4 ,it is sometimes done by direct lying1 and sometimes by indefinite and hypocritical insinuations4 ,agents1 and retailers often assert their wares to be good1 because those of whom they have received them declare them to be such4 ,these declarations are often believed1 because the seller appears or professes to believe them2 while in truth1 he may not give them the least credit4 ,one of the grossest impositions of this kind--common as it is--is practised upon the public in advertising and selling nostrums as safe and valuable medicines4 ,these are ushered into newspapers with a long train of pompous declarations1 almost always false1 and always delusive4 ,the silly purchaser buys and uses the medicine chiefly or solely because it is sold by a respectable man1 under the sanction of advertisements to which that respectable man lends his countenance4 ,were good men to decline this wretched employment1 the medicines would probably soon fall into absolute discredit2 and health and limbs and life would1 in many instances1 be preserved from unnecessary destruction4 #d4 ,another species of fraud consists in concealing the defects of what we sell4 ,this is the general art and villany of that class of men1 commonly called jockeys2 a class which1 in reality1 embraces some who would startle at the thought of being such2--and whole multitudes who would receive the appellation with disdain4 ,the common subterfuge of the jockey is1 that he gives no false accounts2 that the purchaser has eyes of his own1 and must judge of the goods for himself4 ,no defence can be more lame and wretched2 and hardly any more impudent4 ,no purchaser can possibly discover many of the defects in commodities2 he is therefore obliged to depend on the seller for information concerning them4 ,all this the seller well knows1 and if an honest man1 will give the information4 ,now as no purchaser would buy the articles1 if he knew their defects1 except at a reduced price1 whenever the seller does not give this information1 and the purchaser is taken in1 it is by downright villany1 whatever some may pretend to the contrary4 ,nor will the common plea1 that if they buy a bad article1 they have a right to sell it again as well as they can1 ever justify the wretched practice of selling defective goods1 at the full value of those which are more perfect4 #e4 ,a fraud1 still meaner1 is practised1 when we endeavor to lower the value of such commodities as we wish to buy4 ',it is naught1 it is naught1 says the buyer1 but when he hath gone his way he boasteth1' is as applicable to our times1 as to those of ,solomon4 ,the ignorant1 the modest1 and the necessitous--persons who should be the last to suffer from fraud1--are1 in this way1 often made victims4 ,a decisive tone and confident airs1 in men better dressed1 and who are sometimes supposed to know better than themselves1 easily bear down persons so circumstanced1 and persuade them to sell their commodities for less than they are really worth4 ,young shopkeepers are often the dupes of this species of treatment4 ,partly with a view to secure the future custom of the stranger1 and partly in consequence of his statements that he can buy a similar article elsewhere at a much lower price1 7when perhaps the quality of the other is vastly inferior7 they not unfrequently sell goods at a positive sacrifice--and what do they gain by it8 ,the pleasure of being laughed at by the purchaser1 as soon as he is out of sight1 for suffering themselves to be beaten down1 as the phrase is2 and of having him boast of his bargain1 and trumpet abroad1 without a blush1 the value of the articles which he had just been decrying6 #f4 ,i mention the use of false weights and measures last1 not because it is a less heinous fraud1 but because ,i hope it is less frequently practised than many others4 ,but it is a lamentable truth that weights and measures are sometimes used when they are known to be false2 and quite often when they are suspected to be so4 ,more frequently still1 they are used when they have been permitted to become defective through inattention4 ,they are often formed of perishable materials4 ,to meet this there are in most of our communities1 officers appointed to be sealers of weights and measures4 ,when the latter are made of substances known to be liable to decay or wear1 the proprietor is unpardonable if he does not have them frequently and thoroughly examined4 ,i have only adverted to some of the more common kinds of fraud2 such as the young are daily1 and often hourly exposed to1 and against which it is especially important1 not only to their own reputation1 but to their success in business1 that they should be on their guard4 ,i will just enumerate a few others1 for my limits preclude the possibility of any thing more than a bare enumeration4 #a4 ,suffering borrowed articles to be injured by our negligence4 #b4 ,detaining them in our possession longer than the lender had reason to expect4 #c4 ,employing them for purposes not contemplated by the lender4 #d4 ,the returning of an article of inferior value1 although in appearance like that which was borrowed4 #e4 ,passing suspected bank bills1 or depreciated counterfeit or clipped coin4 ,some persons are so conscientious on this point1 that they will sell a clipped piece for old metal1 rather than pass it4 ,but such rigid honesty is rather rare4 #f4 ,the use of pocket money1 by the young1 in a manner different from that which was known to be contemplated by the parent1 or master who furnished it4 #g4 ,the employment of time in a different manner from what was intended2 the mutilating1 by hacking1 breaking1 soiling1 or in any other manner wantonly injuring buildings1 fences1 and other property1 public or private2--and especially crops and fruit trees4 #h4 ,contracting debts1 though ever so small1 without the almost certain prospect of being able to pay them4 #i4 ,neglecting to pay them at the time expected4 #aj4 ,paying in something of less value than we ought4 #aa4 ,breaches of trust4 #ab4 ,breaking of promises4 #ac4 ,overtrading by means of borrowed capital4 ,,section ,,iii4 ,method in ,business4 ,there is one class of men who are of inestimable value to society--and the more so from their scarcity2--,i mean men of business4 ,it is true you could hardly offer a greater insult to most persons than to say they are not of this class2 but you cannot have been very observing not to have learned1 that they who most deserve the charge will think themselves the most insulted by it4 ,nothing contributes more to despatch1 as well as safety and success in business1 than method and regularity4 ,let a person set down in his memorandum book1 every morning1 the several articles of business that ought to be done during the day2 and beginning with the first person he is to call upon1 or the first place he is to go to1 finish that affair1 if possible1 before he begins another2 and so on with the rest4 ,a man of business1 who observes this method1 will hardly ever find himself hurried or disconcerted by forgetfulness4 ,and he who sets down all his transactions in writing1 and keeps his accounts1 and the whole state of his affairs1 in a distinct and accurate order1 so that at any time1 by looking into his books1 he can see in what condition his concerns are1 and whether he is in a thriving or declining way2--such a one1 ,i say1 deserves properly the character of a man of business2 and has a pretty fair prospect of success in his plans4#f ,but such exactness seldom suits the man of pleasure4 ,he has other things in his head4 ,the way to transact a great deal of business in a little time1 and to do it well1 is to observe three rules4 #a4 ,speak to the point4 #b4 ,use no more words than are necessary1 fully to express your meaning4 #c4 ,study beforehand1 and set down in writing afterwards1 a sketch of the transaction4 ,to enable a person to speak to the point1 he must have acquired1 as one essential pre-requisite1 the art of thinking to the point4 ,to effect these objects1 or rather this object1 as they constitute in reality but one1 is the legitimate end of the study of grammar2 of the importance of which ,i am to speak elsewhere4 ,this branch is almost equally indispensable in following the other two rules2 but here1 a thorough knowledge of numbers1 as well as of language1 will be demanded4 #f ,a gentleman of my acquaintance assures me that he always leaves his books1 accounts1 c41 in so complete a state1 on going to bed1 that if he should die during the night1 every thing could be perfectly understood4 ,this rule he adheres to1 as a matter of duty2 not only to his fellow men1 but to ,god4 ,,section ,,iv4 ,application to ,business4 ,there is one piece of prudence1 above all others1 absolutely necessary to those who expect to raise themselves in the world by an employment of any kind2 ,i mean a constant1 unwearied application to the main pursuit4 ,by means of persevering diligence1 joined to frugality1 we see many people in the lowest and most laborious stations in life1 raise themselves to such circumstances as will allow them1 in their old age1 that relief from excessive anxiety and toil which are necessary to make the decline of life easy and comfortable4 ,burgh mentions a merchant1 who1 at first setting out1 opened and shut his shop every day for several weeks together1 without selling goods to the value of two cents2 who by the force of application for a course of years1 rose1 at last1 to a handsome fortune4 ,but ,i have known many who had a variety of opportunities for settling themselves comfortably in the world1 yet1 for want of steadiness to carry any scheme to perfection1 they sunk from one degree of wretchedness to another for many years together1 without the least hopes of ever getting above distress and pinching want4 ,there is hardly an employment in life so trifling that it will not afford a subsistence1 if constantly and faithfully followed4 ,indeed1 it is by indefatigable diligence alone1 that a fortune can be acquired in any business whatever4 ,an estate procured by what is commonly called a lucky hit1 is a rare instance2 and he who expects to have his fortune made in that way1 is about as rational as he who should neglect all probable means of earning1 in hopes that he should some time or other find a treasure4 ,there is no such thing as continuing in the same condition without an income of some kind or other4 ,if a man does not bestir himself1 poverty must1 sooner or later1 overtake him4 ,if he continues to expend for the necessary charges of life1 and will not take the pains to gain something to supply the place of what he deals out1 his funds must at length come to an end2 and the misery of poverty fall upon him at an age when he is less able to grapple with it4 ,no employment that is really useful to mankind deserves to be regarded as mean4 ,this has been a stumbling stone to many young men4 ,because they could not pursue a course which they deemed sufficiently respectable1 they neglected business altogether until so late in life that they were ashamed to make a beginning4 ,a most fatal mistake4 ,pin making is a minute affair1 but will any one call the employment a mean one8 ,if so1 it is one which the whole civilized world encourage1 and to which they are under lasting obligation daily4 ,any useful business ought to be reputable1 which is reputably followed4 ,the character of a drone is always1 especially among the human species1 one of the most contemptible4 ,in proportion to a person's activity for his own good and that of his fellow creatures1 he is to be regarded as a more or less valuable member of society4 ,if all the idle people in the ,united ,states were to be buried in one year1 the loss would be trifling in comparison with the loss of only a very few industrious people4 ,each moment of time ought to be put to proper use1 either in business1 in improving the mind1 in the innocent and necessary relaxations and entertainments of life1 or in the care of the moral and religious part of our nature4 ,each moment of time is1 in the language of theology1 a monument of ,divine mercy4 ,,section ,v4 ,proper ,time of ,doing ,business4 ,there are times and seasons for every lawful purpose of life1 and a very material part of prudence is to judge rightly1 and make the best of them4 ,if you have to deal1 for example1 with a phlegmatic gloomy man1 take him1 if you can1 over his bottle4 ,this advice may seem1 at first view1 to give countenance to a species of fraud3 but is it so8 ,these hypochondriacal people have their fits and starts1 and if you do not take them when they are in an agreeable state of mind1 you are very likely to find them quite as much below par1 as the bottle raises them above4 ,but if you deal with them in this condition1 they are no more themselves than in the former case4 ,i therefore think the advice correct4 ,it is on the same principles1 and in the same belief1 that ,i would advise you1 when you deal with a covetous man1 to propose your business to him immediately after he has been receiving1 rather than expending money4 ,so if you have to do with a drunkard1 call on him in the morning2 for then1 if ever1 his head is clear4 ,again2 if you know a person to be unhappy in his family1 meet him abroad if possible1 rather than at his own house4 ,a statesman will not be likely to give you a favorable reception immediately after being disappointed in some of his schemes4 ,some people are always sour and ill humored from the hour of rising till they have dined4 ,and as in persons1 so in things1 the time is a matter of great consequence2 an eye to the rise and fall of goods2 the favorable season of importing and exporting2--these are some of the things which require the attention of those who expect any considerable share of success4 ,it is not certain but some dishonest person1 under shelter of the rule1 in this chapter1 may gratify a wish to take unfair advantages of those with whom he deals4 ,but ,i hope otherwise2 for ,i should be sorry to give countenance1 for one moment1 to such conduct4 ,my whole purpose 7in this place7 is to give direction to the young for securing their own rights2 not for taking away the rights of others4 ,the man who loves his neighbor as himself1 will not surely put a wrong construction on what ,i have written4 ,i would fain hope that there is no departure here or elsewhere1 in the book1 from sound christian morality2 for it is the bible1 on which ,i wish to see all moral rules based4 ,,section ,,vi4 ,buying upon ,trust4 ',owe no man any thing1' is an apostolic injunction2 and happy is he who has it in his power to obey4 ,in my own opinion1 most young men possess this power1 did they perceive the importance of using it by commencing right4 ,it is not so difficult a thing always to purchase with ready money1 as many people imagine4 ,the great difficulty is to moderate our desires and diminish our wants within bounds proportioned to our income4 ,we can expend much1 or live on little2 and this1 too1 without descending to absolute penury4 ,it is truly surprising to observe how people in similar rank1 condition1 and circumstances1 contrive to expend so very differently4 ,i have known instances of young men who would thrive on an income which would not more than half support their neighbors in circumstances evidently similar4 ,study therefore to live within your income4 ,to this end you must calculate4 ,but here you will be obliged to learn much from personal experience1 dear as her school is1 unless you are willing to learn from that of others4 ,if1 for example1 your income is #fjj a year1 and you sit down at the commencement of the year and calculate on expending #djj1 and saving the remainder1 you will be very liable to fail in your calculation4 ,but if you call in the experience of wiser heads who have travelled the road of life before you1 they will tell you that after you have made every reasonable allowance for necessary expenses during the year1 and believe yourself able to lay up #bjj1 you will not1 once in ten times1 be able to save more than two thirds of that sum--and this1 too1 without any sickness or casualty4 ,it is an important point never to buy what you do not want4 ,many people buy an article merely because it is cheap1 and they can have credit4 ,it is true they imagine they shall want it at some future time1 or can sell it again to advantage4 ,but they would not buy at present1 if it cost them cash1 from their pockets4 ,the mischief is that when the day of payment is distant1 the cost seems more trifling than it really is4 ,franklin's advice is in point2 ',buy what thou hast no need of1 and ere long thou shalt sell thy necessaries2'--and such persons would do well to remember it4 ,the difference between credit and ready money is very great4 ,innumerable things are not bought at all with ready money1 which would be bought in case of trust2 so much easier1 is it1 to order a thing than to pay for it4 ,a future day1 a day of payment must come1 to be sure2 but that is little thought of at the time4 ,but if the money were to be drawn out the moment the thing was received or offered1 these questions would arise2 ,can ,i not do without it8 ,is it indispensable8 ,and if ,i do not buy it1 shall ,i suffer a loss or injury greater in amount than the cost of the thing8 ,if these questions were put1 every time we make a purchase1 we should seldom hear of those suicides which disgrace this country1 and the old world still more4 ,i am aware that it will be said1 and very truly1 that the concerns of merchants1 the purchasing of great estates1 and various other large transactions1 cannot be carried on in this manner2 but these are rare exceptions to the rule4 ,and even in these cases1 there might be much less of bills and bonds1 and all the sources of litigation1 than there now is4 ,but in the every day business of life1 in transactions with the butcher1 the baker1 the tailor1 the shoemaker1 what excuse can there be for pleading the example of the merchant1 who carries on his work by ships and exchanges8 ,a certain young man1 on being requested to keep an account of all he received and expended1 answered that his business was not to keep account books3 that he was sure not to make a mistake as to his income2 and that as to his expenditure1 the purse that held his money1 would be an infallible guide1 for he never bought any thing that he did not immediately pay for4 ,i do not mean to recommend to young men not to keep written accounts1 for as the world is1 ,i deem it indispensable4 ,few1 it is believed1 will deny that they generally pay1 for the same article1 a fourth part more1 in the case of trust1 than in that of ready money4 ,suppose now1 the baker1 butcher1 tailor1 and shoemaker1 receive from you #djj a year4 ,now1 if you multiply the #ajj you lose1 by not paying ready money1 by #bj1 you will find that at the end of twenty years1 you have a loss of #b1jjj1 besides the accumulated interest4 ,the fathers of the ,english church1 forbade selling on trust at a higher price than for ready money1 which was the same thing in effect as to forbid trust2 and this was doubtless one of the great objects those wise and pious men had in view2 for they were fathers in legislation and morals1 as well as in religion4 ,but we of the present age1 seem to have grown wiser than they1 and not only make a difference in the price1 regulated by the difference in the mode of payment1 but no one is expected to do otherwise4 ,we are not only allowed to charge something for the use of the money1 but something additional for the risk of the loss which may frequently arise1--and most frequently does arise--from the misfortunes of those to whom we thus assign our goods on trust4 ,the man1 therefore1 who purchases on trust1 not only pays for being credited1 but he also pays his share of what the tradesman loses by his general practice of selling upon trust2 and after all1 he is not so good a customer as the man who purchases cheaply with ready money4 ,his name1 indeed1 is in the tradesman's book1 but with that name the tradesman cannot buy a fresh supply of goods4 ,infinite1 almost1 are the ways in which people lose by this sort of dealing4 ,domestics sometimes go and order things not wanted at all2 at other times more than is wanted4 ,all this would be obviated by purchasing with ready money2 for whether through the hands of the party himself1 or those of some other person1 there would always be an actual counting out of the money4 ,somebody would see the thing bought1 and the money paid4 ,and as the master would give the steward or housekeeper a purse of money at the time1 he would see the money too1 would set a proper value upon it1 and would just desire to know upon what it had been expended4 ,every man1 who purchases for ready money1 will naturally make the amount of the purchase as low as possible1 in proportion to his means4 ,this care and frugality will make an addition to his means2 and therefore1 at the end of his life1 he will have a great deal more to spend1 and still be as rich as if he had been trusted all his days4 ,in addition to this1 he will eat1 and drink1 and sleep in peace1 and avoid all the endless papers1 and writings1 and receipts1 and bills1 and disputes1 and lawsuits1 inseparable from the credit system4 ,this is by no means intended as a lesson of stinginess1 nor is it any part of my purpose to inculcate the plan of heaping up money4 ,but purchasing with ready money really gives you more money to purchase with2 you can afford to have a greater quantity and variety of enjoyments4 ,in the town1 it will tend to hasten your pace along the streets1 for the temptation at the windows is answered in a moment by clapping your hand upon your pocket2 and the question2 ',do ,i really want it8' is sure to recur immediately2 because the touch of the money will put the thought into your mind4 ,now supposing you to have a fortune1 even beyond your actual wants1 would not the money which you might save in this way1 be very well applied in acts of real benevolence8 ,can you walk or ride a mile1 in the city or country1 or go to half a dozen houses2 or in fact can you open your eyes without seeing some human being1 born in the same country with yourself1 and who1 on that account alone1 has some claim upon your good wishes and your charity8 ,can you1 if you would1 avoid seeing one person1 if no more1 to whom even a small portion of your annual savings would convey gladness of heart8 ,your own feelings will suggest the answer4 ,,section ,,vii4 ,of entrusting ,business to others4 ',if you wish to have your business done1 go2 if not1 send4' ,this is an old maxim2 and one which is no less true than old4 ,every young man1 on setting out in the world1 should make it a rule1 never to trust any thing of consequence to another1 which he can1 without too much difficulty1 perform himself4 #a4 ,because1 let a person have my interest ever so much at heart1 ,i am sure ,i regard it more myself4 #b4 ,nothing is more difficult than to know1 in all cases1 the characters of those we confide in4 ,how can we expect to understand the characters of others1 when we scarcely know our own8 ,which of us can know1 positively1 that he shall never be guilty of another vice or weakness1 or yield to another temptation1 and thus forfeit public confidence8 ,who1 then1 will needlessly trust another1 when he can hardly be sure of himself8 #c4 ,no substitute we can employ1 can understand our business as well as ourselves4 #d4 ,we can change our measures according to changing circumstances2 which gives us those opportunities of doing things in the best way1 of which another will not feel justified in availing himself4 ,as for dependants of every kind1 it should ever be remembered that their master's interest sometimes possesses only the second place in their hearts4 ,self-love1 with such1 will be the ruling principle of action2 and no fidelity whatever will prevent a person from bestowing a good deal of thought upon his own concerns4 ,but this must1 of necessity1 break in more or less upon his diligence in consulting the interest of his employers4 ,how men of business can venture1 as they sometimes do1 to trust concerns of great importance1 for half of every week in the year1 7which is half the whole year7 to dependants1 and thus expect others to take care of their business1 when they will not be at the trouble of minding it themselves1 is to me inconceivable6 ,nor does the detection1 from time to time1 of fraud in such persons1 seem at all to diminish this practice4 ,there is a maxim among business people1 'never to do that for themselves which they can pay another for doing4' ,this1 though true to a certain extent1 is liable to abuse4 ,if every body1 without discrimination1 could be safely trusted1 the maxim might be more just2 since nothing is more obvious than that laborers are often at hand1 whose time can be bought for a much less sum of money than you would yourself earn in the meantime4 ,i have often known people make or mend little pieces of furniture1 implements of their occupations1 c4 to save expense1 when they could have earned1 at their labor during the same time1 twice the sum necessary to pay a trusty and excellent workman for doing it4 ,but1 as ,i have already observed1 persons are not always at hand1 in whom you can confide2 so that the certainty of having a thing done right1 is worth much more than the loss of a little time4 ,besides1 ,god has never said how much we must do in this world4 ,we are indeed to do all we can1 and at the same time do it well2 but how much that is1 we must judge4 ,he is not necessarily the most useful man who does even the greatest amount of good2--but he who does the most good1 attended with the least evil4 ,but we should remember that what others do1 is not done by ourselves4 ,still1 an individual may often do many little things without any hindrance to his main object4 ,for example1 ,i would not thank a person to make or mend my pen1 or shave me2 because ,i can write as much1 or perform as much business of any kind1 in a week or month--probably more--if ,i stop to mend my pens1 shave myself daily1 make fires1 saw and split wood1 c4 as if ,i do not4 ,and the same is true of a thousand other things4 ,,section ,,viii4 ,over ,trading4 ,i have already classed this among the frauds into which business men are in danger of falling2 and ,i cannot but think its character will be pretty well established by what follows4 ,over trading is an error into which many industrious1 and active young men are apt to run1 from a desire of getting rich more rapidly than they are able to do with a smaller business4 ,and yet profusion itself is not more dangerous4 ,indeed1 ,i question whether idleness brings more people to ruin than over trading4 ,this subject is intimately connected with credit1 for it is the credit system that gives such facilities to over trading4 ,but of the evils of credit ,i have treated fully elsewhere ,i will only add1 under this head1 a few remarks on one particular species of trading4 ,i refer to the conduct of many persons1 with large capitals1 who1 for the sake of adding to a heap already too large1 monopolize the market1--or trade for a profit which they know dealers of smaller fortunes cannot possibly live by4 ,if such men really think that raising themselves on the ruin of others1 in this manner1 is justifiable1 and that riches obtained in this manner are fairly earned1 they must certainly have either neglected to inform themselves1 or stifled the remonstrances of conscience1 and bid defiance to the laws of ,god4 ,,section ,,ix4 ,making ,contracts beforehand4 ,in making bargains--with workmen1 for example--always do it beforehand1 and never suffer the matter to be deferred by their saying they will leave it to your discretion4 ,there are several reasons why this ought to be done4 #ast4 ,it prevents any difficulty afterward2 and does no harm1 even when the intentions of both parties are perfectly good4 #b;d4 ,if you are dealing with a knave1 it prevents him from accomplishing any evil designs he may have upon you4 #c;d4 ,young people are apt to be deceived by appearances1 both from a credulity common to their youth and inexperience1 and because neither the young nor the old have any certain method of knowing human character by externals4 ,the most open hearted are the most liable to be imposed upon by the designing4 ,it will be well to have all your business--of course all contracts--as far as may be practicable1 in writing4 ,and it would be well if men of business would make it a constant rule1 whenever and wherever it is possible1 to draw up a minute or memorial of every transaction1 subscribed by both1 with a clause signifying that in case of any difference1 they would submit the matter to arbitration4 ,nothing is more common than for a designing person to put off the individual he wishes to take advantage of1 by saying2 ,we shan't disagree4 ,i'll do what's right about it2 ,i won't wrong you1 c4 ,and then when accounts come to be settled1 and the party who thinks himself aggrieved1 says that he made the bargain with the expectation of having such and such advantages allowed him1 ,no1 says the sharper1 ,i never told you any such thing4 ,it is on this account that you cannot be too exact in making contracts2 nor is there indeed any safety in dealing with deceitful and avaricious people1 after you have taken all the precaution in your power4 ,,section ,x4 ,how to know with whom to deal4 ,there are two maxims in common life that seem to clash with each other1 most pointedly4 ,the first is1 ',use every precaution with a stranger1 that you would wish you had done1 should he turn out to be a villain2' and secondly1 ',treat every man as an honest man1 until he proves to be otherwise4' ,now there is good advice in both these maxims4 ,by this ,i mean that they may both be observed1 to a certain extent1 without interfering with each other4 ,you may be cautious about hastily becoming acquainted with a stranger1 and yet so far as you have any concern with him1 treat him like an honest man4 ,no reasonable person will complain if you do not unbosom yourself to him at once4 ,and if he is unreasonable1 you will not wish for an intimate acquaintance with him4 ,my present purpose is to offer a few hints1 with a view to assist you in judging of the characters of those with whom it may be your lot to deal4 ,remember1 however1 that like all things human1 they are imperfect4 ,all ,i can say is that they are the best ,i can offer4 ,there is something in knavery that will hardly bear the inspection of a piercing eye2 and you may1 more generally1 observe in a sharper an unsteady and confused look4 ,if a person is persuaded of the uncommon sagacity of one before whom he is to appear1 he will hardly succeed in mustering impudence and artifice enough to bear him through without faltering4 ,it will1 therefore1 be a good way to try one whom you have reason to suspect of a design upon you1 by fixing your eyes upon his1 and bringing up a supposition of your having to do with one whose integrity you suspected2 stating what you would do in such a case4 ,if the person you are talking with be really what you expect1 he will hardly be able to keep his countenance4 ,it will be a safe rule1--though doubtless there are exceptions to it1--to take mankind to be more or less avaricious4 ,yet a great love of money is a great enemy to honesty4 ,the aged are1 in this respect1 more dangerous than the young4 ,it will be your wisdom ever to be cautious of aged avarice2 and especially of those who1 in an affected and forced manner1 bring in religion1 and talk much of duty on all occasions2 of all smooth and fawning people2 of those who are very talkative1 and who1 in dealing with you1 endeavor to draw off your attention from the point in hand by incoherent or random expressions4 ,i have already advised you how to proceed with those of whom you have good reason to be suspicious4 ,but by all means avoid entertaining unnecessary suspicions of your fellow beings2 for it will usually render both you and them the more miserable4 ,it is often owing to a consciousness of a designing temper1 in ourselves1 that we are led to suspect others4 ,if you hear a person boasting of having got a remarkably good bargain1 you may generally conclude him by no means too honest2 for almost always where one gains much in a bargain1 the other loses4 ,i know well that cases occur where both parties are gainers1 but not greatly so4 ,and when you hear a man triumph in gaining by another's loss1 you may easily judge of his character4 ,let me warn you against the sanguine promisers4 ,of these there are two sorts4 ,the first are those who from a foolish custom of fawning upon all those whom they meet with in company1 have acquired a habit of promising great favors which they have no idea of performing4 ,the second are a sort of warm hearted people1 who while they lavish their promises have some thoughts of performing them2 but when the time comes1 and the sanguine fit is worn off1 the trouble or expense appears in another light2 the promiser cools1 and the expectant is disappointed4 ,be cautious of dealing with an avaricious and cruel man1 for if it should happen by an unlucky turn of trade that you should come into the power of such a person1 you have nothing to expect but the utmost rigor of the law4 ,in negotiating1 there are a number of circumstances to be considered2 the neglect of any of which may defeat your whole scheme4 ,these will be mentioned in the next section4 ,,section ,,xi4 ,how to take ,men as they are4 ,such a knowledge of human character as will enable us to treat mankind according to their dispositions1 circumstances1 and modes of thinking1 so as to secure their aid in all our laudable purposes1 is absolutely indispensable4 ,and while all men boast of their knowledge of human nature1 and would rather be thought ignorant of almost every thing else than this1 how obvious it is that there is nothing in regard to which there exists so much ignorance6 ,a miser is by no means a proper person to apply to for a favor that will cost him any thing4 ,but if he chance to be a man of principle1 he may make an excellent partner in trade1 or arbitrator in a dispute about property2 for he will have patience to investigate little things1 and to stand about trifles1 which a generous man would scorn4 ,still1 as an honest man1 and above all as a ,christian1 ,i doubt whether it would be quite right thus to derive advantage from the vices of another4 ,in employing the miser1 you give scope to his particular vice4 ,a passionate man will fly into a rage at the most trifling affront1 but he will generally forget it nearly as soon1 and be glad to do any thing in his power to make up with you4 ,it is not therefore so dangerous to disoblige him1 as the gloomy1 sullen mortal1 who will wait seven years for an opportunity to do you mischief4 ,a cool1 slow man1 who is somewhat advanced in age1 is generally the best person to advise with4 ,for despatch of business1 however1 make use of the young1 the warm1 and the sanguine4 ,some men are of no character at all2 but always take a tinge from the last company they were in4 ,their advice1 as well as their assistance1 is usually good for nothing4 ,it is in vain to think of finding any thing very valuable in the mind of a covetous man4 ,avarice is generally the vice of abject spirits4 ,men who have a very great talent at making money1 commonly have no other2 for the man who began with nothing1 and has accumulated wealth1 has been too busy to think of improving his mind2 or indeed1 to think of any thing else but property4 ,a boaster is always to be suspected4 ,his is a natural infirmity1 which makes him forget what he is about1 and run into a thousand extravagances that have no connection with the truth4 ,with those who have a tolerable knowledge of the world1 all his assertions1 professions of friendship1 promises1 and threatenings1 go for nothing4 ,trust him with a secret1 and he will surely discover it1 either through vanity or levity4 ,a meek tempered man is not quite the proper person for you2 his modesty will be easily confounded4--,the talkative man will be apt to forget himself1 and blunder out something that will give you trouble4 ,a man's ruling passion is the key by which you may come at his character1 and pretty nearly guess how he will act in any given circumstances1 unless he is a wit or a fool2 they act chiefly from caprice4 ,there are likewise connections between the different parts of men's characters1 which it will be useful for you to study4 ,for example1 if you find a man to be hasty and passionate1 you may generally take it for granted he is open and artless1 and so on4 ,like other general rules1 however1 this admits of many exceptions4 ,a bully is usually a coward4 ,when1 therefore1 you unluckily have to deal with such a man1 the best way is to make up to him boldly1 and answer him with firmness4 ,if you show the least sign of submission1 he will take advantage of it to use you ill4 ,there are six sorts of people1 at whose hands you need not expect much kindness4 ,the sordid and narrow minded1 think of nobody but themselves4 ,the lazy will not take the trouble to oblige you4 ,the busy have not time to think of you4 ,the overgrown rich man1 is above regarding any one1 how much soever he may stand in need of assistance4 ,the poor and unhappy often have not the ability4 ,the good natured simpleton1 however willing1 is incapable of serving you4#g ,the age of the person you are to deal with is also to be considered4 ,young people are easily drawn into any scheme1 merely from its being new1 especially if it falls in with their love of pleasure2 but they are almost as easily discouraged from it by the next person they meet with4 ,they are not good counsellors1 for they are apt to be precipitate and thoughtless2 but are very fit for action1 where you prescribe them a track from which they know they must not vary4 ,old age1 on the contrary1 is slow but sure2 very cautious2 opposed to new schemes and ways of life2 inclining1 generally1 to covetousness2 fitter to consult with you1 than to act for you2 not so easily won by fair speeches or long reasonings2 tenacious of old opinions1 customs1 and formalities2 apt to be displeased with those1 especially younger people1 who pretend to question their judgment2 fond of deference1 and of being listened to4 ,young people1 in their anger1 mean less than they say2 old people more4 ,you may make up for an injury with most young men2 the old are generally more slow in forgiving4 ,the fittest character to be concerned with in business1 is1 that in which are united an inviolable integrity1 founded upon rational principles of virtue and religion1 a cool but determined temper1 a friendly heart1 a ready hand1 long experience and extensive knowledge of the world2 with a solid reputation of many years' standing1 and easy circumstances4 #g ,these statements may seem to require a little qualification4 ,there are two sorts of busy men4 ,one sort are busy1 as the result of benevolent purpose4 ,these are often among the best of mankind2 and though always busy in carrying out their plans1 they find time to perform a thousand little acts of goodness1 notwithstanding4--,it has1 indeed1 been sometimes said1 that when a great public enterprise is about to be undertaken1 which requires the aid of individual contributions1 either of time or money1 those who are most busy1 and from whom we might naturally expect the least1 often do the most4 ,it is also said that men of business have the most leisure2 and it sometimes seems to be true1 where they methodize their plans properly4 ,these maxims1 however1 apply with the most force to men devoted to a higher purpose than the worship of this world--men who live for ,god1 and the good of his universe1 generally4 ,there are also two sorts of rich men4 ,some men may have property in their hands to an immense amount1 without possessing a worldly spirit4 ,the rich man referred to above1 is of another sort4 ,he is the man who 'gets all he can1 and keeps all he can get4' ,this is probably the gospel definition of the term1 a rich man1 who1 it is said1 can no more enter a world of spiritual enjoyment than a camel or a cable can go through 'the eye of a needle4' ,,section ,,xii4 ,of desiring the good opinion of others4 ,a young man is not far from ruin1 when he can say1 without blushing1 ,i don't care what others think of me4 ,to be insensible to public opinion1 or to the estimation in which we are held by others1 by no means indicates a good and generous spirit4 ,but to have a due regard to public opinion is one thing1 and to make that opinion the principal rule of action1 quite another4 ,there is no greater weakness than that of letting our happiness depend too much upon the opinion of others4 ,other people lie under such disadvantages for coming at our true characters1 and are so often misled by prejudice for or against us1 that if our own conscience condemns us1 their approbation can give us little consolation4 ,on the other hand1 if we are sure we acted from honest motives1 and with a reference to proper ends1 it is of little consequence if the world should happen to find fault4 ,mankind1 for the most part1 are so much governed by fancy1 that what will win their hearts to-day1 will disgust them to-morrow2 and he who undertakes to please every body at all times1 places1 and circumstances1 will never be in want of employment4 ,a wise man1 when he hears of reflections made upon him1 will consider whether they are just4 ,if they are1 he will correct the faults in question1 with as much cheerfulness as if they had been suggested by his dearest friend4 ,i have sometimes thought that1 in this view1 enemies were the best of friends4 ,those who are merely friends in name1 are often unwilling to tell us a great many things which it is of the highest importance that we should know4 ,but our enemies1 from spite1 envy1 or some other cause1 mention them2 and we ought on the whole to rejoice that they do1 and to make the most of their remarks4 ,,section ,,xiii4 ,intermeddling with the affairs of others4 ,there are some persons who never appear to be happy1 if left to themselves and their own reflections4 ,all their enjoyment seems to come from without2 none from within4 ,they are ever for having something to do with the affairs of others4 ,not a single petty quarrel can take place1 in the neighborhood1 but they suffer their feelings to be enlisted1 and allow themselves to take sides with one of the parties4 ,those who possess such a disposition are among the most miserable of their race4 ,an old writer says that ',every one should mind his own business2 for he who is perpetually concerning himself about the good or ill fortune of others1 will never be at rest4' ,and he says truly4 ,it is not denied that some men are professionally bound to attend to the concerns of others4 ,but this is not the case supposed4 ,the bulk of mankind will be happier1 and do more for others1 by letting them alone2 at least by avoiding any of that sort of meddling which may be construed into officiousness4 ,some of the worst meddlers in human society are those who have been denominated match-makers4 ,a better name for them1 however1 would be match-breakers1 for if they do not actually break more matches than they make1 they usually cause a great deal of misery to those whom they are instrumental in bringing prematurely together4 ,many people who1 in other respects1 pass for excellent1 do not hesitate to take sides on almost all occasions1 whether they know much about the real merits of the case or not4 ,others judge1 at once1 of every one of whom they hear any thing evil1 and in the same premature manner4 ,all these and a thousand other kinds of 'meddling' do much evil4 ,the tendency is to keep men like ,ishmael1 with their hands against every man1 and every man's hands against theirs4 ,,section ,,xiv4 ,on ,keeping ,secrets4 ,it is sometimes said that in a good state of society there would be no necessity of keeping secrets1 for no individual would have any thing to conceal4 ,this may be true2 but if so1 society is far--very far--from being as perfect as it ought to be4 ,at present we shall find no intelligent circle1 except it were the society of the glorified above1 which does not require occasional secrecy4 ,but if there are secrets to be kept1 somebody must keep them4 ,some persons can hardly conceal a secret1 if they would4 ,they will promise readily enough2 but the moment they gain possession of the fact1 its importance rises in their estimation1 till it occupies so much of their waking thoughts1 that it will be almost certain1 in some form or other1 to escape them4 ,others are not very anxious to conceal things which are entrusted to them4 ,they may not wish to make mischief1 exactly2 but there is a sort of recklessness about them1 that renders them very unsafe confidants4 ,others again1 when they promise1 mean to perform4 ,but no sooner do they possess the treasure committed to their charge1 than they begin to grow forgetful of the manner of coming by it4 ,and before they are aware1 they reveal it4 ,there are not many then1 whom it is safe to trust4 ,these you will value as they do diamonds1 in proportion to their scarcity4 ,but there are individuals who merit your highest confidence1 if you can but find them4 ,husbands1 where a union is founded as it ought to be1 can usually trust their wives4 ,this is one of the prominent advantages of matrimony4 ,it gives us an opportunity of unbosoming our feelings and views and wishes not only with safety1 but often with sympathy4 ,but confidence may sometimes be reposed1 in other circumstances4 ,too much reserve makes us miserable4 ,perhaps it were better that we should suffer a little1 now and then1 than that we should never trust4 ,as an instance of the extent to which mankind can sometimes be confided in1 and to show that celibacy1 too1 is not without this virtue1 you will allow me to relate1 briefly1 an anecdote4 ,a certain husband and wife had difficulties4 ,they both sought advice of a single gentleman1 their family physician4 ,for some time there was hope of an amicable adjustment of all grievances2 but at length every effort proved vain1 and an open quarrel ensued4 ,but what was the surprise of each party to learn by accident1 some time afterward1 that both of them had sought counsel of the same individual1 and yet he had not betrayed the trust4 ,in a few instances1 too1 secrets have been confided to husbands1 without their communicating them to their wives2 and the contrary4 ,this was done1 however1 by particular request4 ,it is a requisition which1 for my own part1 ,i should be very unwilling to make4 ,,section ,,xv4 ,fear of ,poverty4 ,the ingenious but sometimes fanciful ,dr4 ,darwin1 reckons the fear of poverty as a disease1 and goes on to prescribe for it4 ,the truth is1 there is not much real poverty in this country4 ,our very paupers are rich1 for they usually have plenty of wholesome food1 and comfortable clothing1 and what could a ,croesus1 with all his riches1 have more8 ,poverty exists much more in imagination than in reality4 ,the shame of being thought poor1 is a great and fatal weakness1 to say the least4 ,it depends1 it is true1 much upon the fashion4 ,so long as the phrase 'he is a good man1' means that the person spoken of is rich1 we need not wonder that every one wishes to be thought richer than he is4 ,when adulation is sure to follow wealth1 and when contempt would be sure to follow many if they were not wealthy2 when people are spoken of with deference1 and even lauded to the skies because their riches are very great2 when this is the case1 ,i say1 we need not wonder if men are ashamed to be thought poor4 ,but this is one of the greatest dangers which young people have to encounter in setting out in life4 ,it has brought thousands and hundreds of thousands to pecuniary ruin4 ,one of the most amiable features of good republican society is this2 that men seldom boast of their riches1 or disguise their poverty1 but speak of both1 as of any other matters that are proper for conversation4 ,no man shuns another because he is poor2 no man is preferred to another because he is rich4 ,in hundreds and hundreds of instances have men in this country1 not worth a shilling1 been chosen by the people to take care of their rights and interests1 in preference to men who ride in their carriages4 ,the shame of being thought poor leads to everlasting efforts to disguise one's poverty4 ,the carriage--the domestics--the wine--the spirits--the decanters--the glass2--all the table apparatus1 the horses1 the dresses1 the dinners1 and the parties1 must be kept up2 not so much because he or she who keeps or gives them has any pleasure arising therefrom1 as because not to keep and give them1 would give rise to a suspicion of a want of means4 ,and thus thousands upon thousands are yearly brought into a state of real poverty1 merely by their great anxiety not to be thought poor4 ,look around you carefully1 and see if this is not so4 ,in how many instances have you seen amiable and industrious families brought to ruin by nothing else but the fear they should be8 ,resolve1 then1 from the first1 to set this false shame at defiance4 ,when you have done that1 effectually1 you have laid the corner-stone of mental tranquillity4 ,there are thousands of families at this very moment1 struggling to keep up appearances4 ,they feel that it makes them miserable2 but you can no more induce them to change their course1 than you can put a stop to the miser's laying up gold4 ,farmers accommodate themselves to their condition more easily than merchants1 mechanics1 and professional men4 ,they live at a greater distance from their neighbors2 they can change their style of living without being perceived2 they can put away the decanter1 change the china for something plain1 and the world is none the wiser for it4 ,but the mechanic1 the doctor1 the attorney1 and the trader cannot make the change so quietly and unseen4 ,stimulating drink1 which is a sort of criterion of the scale of living1--7or scale to the plan17--a sort of key to the tune2--this is the thing to banish first of all1 because all the rest follow2 and in a short time1 come down to their proper level4 ,am ,i asked1 what is a glass of wine8 ,i answer1 it is every thing4 ,it creates a demand for all the other unnecessary expenses2 it is injurious to health1 and must be so4 ,every bottle of wine that is drank contains a portion of spirit1 to say nothing of other drugs still more poisonous2 and of all friends to the doctors1 alcoholic drinks are the greatest4 ,it is nearly the same1 however1 with strong tea and coffee4 ,but what adds to the folly and wickedness of using these drinks1 the parties themselves do not always drink them by choice2 and hardly ever because they believe they are useful2--but from mere ostentation1 or the fear of being thought either rigid or stingy4 ,at this very moment1 thousands of families daily use some half a dozen drinks1 besides the best1 because if they drank water only1 they might not be regarded as genteel2 or might be suspected of poverty4 ,and thus they waste their property and their health4 ,poverty frequently arises from the very virtues of the impoverished parties4 ,not so frequently1 ,i admit1 as from vice1 folly1 and indiscretion2 but still very frequently4 ,and as it is according to scripture not to 'despise the poor1 because he is poor1' so we ought not to honor the rich merely because he is rich4 ,the true way is to take a fair survey of the character of a man as exhibited in his conduct2 and to respect him1 or otherwise1 according to a due estimate of that character4 ,few countries exhibit more of those fatal terminations of life1 called suicides1 than this4 ,many of these unnatural crimes arise from an unreasonable estimate of the evils of poverty4 ,their victims1 it is true1 may be called insane2 but their insanity almost always arises from the dread of poverty4 ,not1 indeed1 from the dread of the want of means for sustaining life1 or even decent living2 but from the dread of being thought or known to be poor2--from the dread of what is called falling in the scale of society4#h ,viewed in its true light1 what is there in poverty that can tempt a man to take away his own life8 ,he is the same man that he was before2 he has the same body and the same mind4 ,suppose he can foresee an alteration in his dress or his diet1 should he kill himself on that account8 ,are these all the things that a man wishes to live for8 ,i do not deny that we ought to take care of our means1 use them prudently and sparingly1 and keep our expenses always within the limits of our income1 be that what it may4 ,one of the effectual means of doing this1 is to purchase with ready money4 ,on this point1 ,i have already remarked at length1 and will only repeat here the injunction of ,st4 ,paul2 ',owe no man any thing2' although the fashion of the whole world should be against you4 ,should you regard the advice of this section1 the counsels of the next will be of less consequence2 for you will have removed one of the strongest inducements to speculation1 as well as to overtrading4 #h ,i should be sorry to be understood as affirming that a majority of suicidal acts are the result of intemperance2--by no means4 ,my own opinion is1 that if there be a single vice more fruitful of this horrid crime than any other1 it is gross sensuality4 ,the records of insane hospitals1 even in this country will show1 that this is not mere conjecture4 ,as it happens1 however1 that the latter vice is usually accompanied by intemperance in eating and drinking1 by gambling1 c41 the blame is commonly thrown1 not on the principal agent concerned in the crime1 but on the accomplices4 ,,section ,,xvi4 ,on ,speculation4 ,young men are apt to be fond of speculation4 ,this propensity is very early developed--first in the family--and afterwards at the school4 ,by speculation1 ,i mean the purchasing of something which you do not want for use1 solely with a view to sell it again at a large profit2 but on the sale of which there is a hazard4 ,when purchases of this sort are made with the person's own cash1 they are not so unreasonable1 but when they are made by one who is deeply indebted to his fellow beings1 or with money borrowed for the purpose1 it is not a whit better than gambling1 let the practice be defended by whom it may3 and has been in every country1 especially in this1 a fruitful source of poverty1 misery1 and suicide4 ,grant that this species of gambling has arisen from the facility of obtaining the fictitious means of making the purchase1 still it is not the less necessary that ,i beseech you not to practise it1 and if engaged in it already1 to disentangle yourself as soon as you can4 ,your life1 while thus engaged1 is that of a gamester--call it by what smoother name you may4 ,it is a life of constant anxiety1 desire to overreach1 and general gloom2 enlivened now and then1 by a gleam of hope or of success4 ,even that success is sure to lead to farther adventures2 till at last1 a thousand to one1 that your fate is that of 'the pitcher to the well4' ,the great temptation to this1 as well as to every other species of gambling1 is1 the success of the few4 ,as young men1 who crowd to the army in search of rank and renown1 never look into the ditch that holds their slaughtered companions1 but have their eye constantly fixed on the commander-in-chief2 and as each of them belongs to the same profession1 and is sure to be conscious that he has equal merit1 every one dreams himself the suitable successor of him who is surrounded with aides-de-camp1 and who moves battalions and columns by his nod2--so with the rising generation of 'speculators4' ,they see those whom they suppose nature and good laws made to black shoes1 or sweep chimneys or streets1 rolling in carriages1 or sitting in palaces1 surrounded by servants or slaves2 and they can see no earthly reason why they should not all do the same4 ,they forget the thousands1 and tens of thousands1 who in making the attempt1 have reduced themselves to beggary4 ,,section ,,xvii4 ,on ,lawsuits4 ,in every situation in life1 avoid the law4 ,man's nature must be changed1 perhaps1 before lawsuits will entirely cease2 and yet it is in the power of most men to avoid them1 in a considerable degree4 ,one excellent rule is1 to have as little as possible to do with those who are fond of litigation2 and who1 upon every slight occasion1 talk of an appeal to the law4 ,this may be called a disease2 and1 like many other diseases1 it is contagious4 ,besides1 these persons1 from their frequent litigations1 contract a habit of using the technical terms of the courts1 in which they take a pride1 and are therefore1 as companions1 peculiarly disgusting to men of sense4 ,to such beings a lawsuit is a luxury1 instead of being regarded as a source of anxiety1 and a real scourge4 ,such men are always of a quarrelsome disposition1 and avail themselves of every opportunity to indulge in that which is mischievous to their neighbors4 ,in thousands of instances1 men go to law for the indulgence of mere anger4 ,the ,germans are said to bring spite-actions against one another1 and to harass their poorer neighbors from motives of pure revenge4 ,but ,i hope this is a mistake2 for ,i am unwilling to think so ill of that intelligent nation4 ,before you decide to go to law1 consider well the cost1 for if you win your suit and are poorer than you were before1 what do you gain by it8 ,you only imbibe a little additional anger against your opponent2 you injure him1 but at the same time1 injure yourself more4 ,better to put up with the loss of one dollar than of two2 to which is to be added1 all the loss of time1 all the trouble1 and all the mortification and anxiety attending a lawsuit4 ,to set an attorney at work to worry and torment another man1 and alarm his family as well as himself1 while you are sitting quietly at home1 is baseness4 ,if a man owe you money which he cannot pay1 why add to his distress1 without even the chance of benefiting yourself8 ,thousands have injured themselves by resorting to the law1 while very few1 indeed1 ever bettered their condition by it4 ,nearly a million of dollars was once expended in ,england1 during the progress of a single lawsuit4 ,those who brought the suit expended #ddd1jjj to carry it through2 and the opposite party was acquitted1 and only sentenced to pay the cost of prosecution1 amounting to #cah1ged4 ,another was sustained in court fifty years1 at an enormous expense4 ,in ,meadville1 in ,pennsylvania1 a petty law case occurred in which the damages recovered were only ten dollars1 while the costs of court were one hundred4 ,in one of the ,new ,england ,states1 a lawsuit occurred1 which could not have cost the parties less than #a1jjj each2 and yet after all this expense1 they mutually agreed to take the matter out of court1 and suffer it to end where it was4 ,probably it was the wisest course they could possibly have taken4 ,it is also stated that a quarrel occurred between two persons in ,middlebury1 ,vermont1 a few years since1 about six eggs1 which was carried from one court to another1 till it cost the parties #d1jjj4 ,i am well acquainted with a gentleman who was once engaged in a lawsuit1 7than which none perhaps1 was ever more just7 where his claim was one to two thousand dollars2 but it fell into such a train that a final decision could not have been expected in many months2--perhaps not in years4 ,the gentleman was unwilling to be detained and perplexed with waiting for a trial1 and he accordingly paid the whole amount of costs to that time1 amounting to #aej1 went about his business1 and believes1 to this hour1 that it was the wisest course he could have pursued4 ,a spirit of litigation often disturbs the peace of a whole neighborhood1 perpetually1 for several generations2 and the hostile feeling thus engendered seems to be transmitted1 like the color of the eyes or the hair1 from father to son4 ,indeed it not unfrequently happens1 that a lawsuit in a neighborhood1 a society1 or even a church1 awakens feelings of discord1 which never terminate1 but at the death of the parties concerned4 ,how ought young men1 then1 to avoid1 as they would a pestilence1 this fiend-like spirit6 ,how ought they to labor to settle all disputes--should disputes unfortunately arise1--without this tremendous resort6 ,on the strength of much observation1--not experience1 for ,i have been saved the pain of learning in that painful school1 on this subject1--,i do not hesitate to recommend the settlement of such difficulties by arbitration4 ,one thing however should be remembered4 ,would you dry up the river of discord1 you must first exhaust the fountains and rills which form it4 ,the moment you indulge one impassioned or angry feeling against your fellow being1 you have taken a step in the high road which leads to litigation1 war and murder4 ,thus it is1 as ,i have already told you1 that ',he that hateth his brother is a murderer4' ,i have heard a father--for he hath the name of parent1 though he little deserved it--gravely contend that there was no such thing as avoiding quarrels and lawsuits4 ,he thought there was one thing1 however1 which might prevent them1 which was to take the litigious individual and 'tar and feather' him without ceremony4 ,how often is it true that mankind little know 'what manner of spirit they are of2' and to how many of us will this striking reproof of the ,saviour apply6 ,multitudes of men have been in active business during a long life1 and yet avoided every thing in the shape of a lawsuit4 ',what man has done1 man may do2' in this respect1 at the least4 ,,section ,,xviii4 ,on ,hard ,dealing4 ,few things are more common among business-doing men1 than hard dealing2 yet few things reflect more dishonor on a ,christian community4 ,it seems1 in general1 to be regarded as morally right1--in defiance of all rules1 whether golden or not1--to get as 'good a bargain' in trade1 as possible2 and this is defended as unavoidable1 on account of the state of society6 ,but what produced this state of society8 ,was it not the spirit of avarice8 ,what will change it for the better8 ,nothing but the renunciation of this spirit1 and a willingness to sacrifice1 in this respect1 for the public welfare4 ,we are pagans in this matter1 in spite of our professions4 ,it would be profitable for us to take lessons on this subject from the ,mohammedans4 ,they never have1 it is said1 but one price for an article2 and to ask the meanest shopkeeper to lower his price1 is to insult him4 ,would this were the only point1 in which the ,christian community are destined yet to learn even from ,mohammedans4 ,to ask one price and take another1 or to offer one price and give another1 besides being a loss of time1 is highly dishonorable to the parties4 ,it is1 in fact1 a species of lying2 and it answers no one advantageous purpose1 either to the buyer or seller4 ,i hope that every young man will start in life with a resolution never to be hard in his dealings4 ',it is an evil which will correct itself2' say those who wish to avail themselves of its present advantages a little longer4 ,but when and where did a general evil correct itself8 ,when or where was an erroneous practice permanently removed1 except by a change of public sentiment8 ,and what has ever produced a change in the public sentiment but the determination of individuals1 or their combined action8 ,while on this topic1 ,i will hazard the assertion--even at the risk of its being thought misplaced--that great effects are yet to be produced on public opinion1 in this country1 by associations of spirited and intelligent young men4 ,i am not now speaking of associations for political purposes1 though ,i am not sure that even these might not be usefully conducted2 but of associations for mutual improvement1 and for the correction and elevation of the public morals4 ,the ,boston ,young ,men's ,society1 afford a specimen of what may be done in this way2 and numerous associations of the kind have sprung up and are springing up in various parts of the country4 ,judiciously managed1 they must inevitably do great good2--though it should not be forgotten that they may also be productive of immense evil4 ,,chapter ,,iii4 ,on ,amusements and ,indulgences4 ,,section ,i4 ,on ,gaming4 ,even ,voltaire asserts that 'every gambler is1 has been1 or will be a robber4' ,few practices are more ancient1 few more general1 and few1 if any1 more pernicious than gaming4 ,an ,english writer has ingeniously suggested that the ,devil himself might have been the first player1 and that he contrived the plan of introducing games among men1 to afford them temporary amusement1 and divert their attention from themselves4 ',what numberless disciples1' he adds1 'of his sable majesty1 might we not count in our own metropolis6' ,whether his satanic majesty has any very direct agency in this matter or not1 one thing is certain2--gaming is opposed to the happiness of mankind1 and ought1 in every civilized country1 to be suppressed by public opinion4 ,by gaming1 however1 ,i here refer to those cases only in which property is at stake1 to be won or lost4 ,the subject of diversions will be considered in another place4 ,gaming is an evil1 because1 in the first place1 it is a practice which produces nothing4 ,he who makes two blades of grass grow where but one grew before1 has usually been admitted to be a public benefactor2 for he is a producer4 ,so is he who combines or arranges these productions in a useful manner1--,i mean the mechanic1 manufacturer1 c4 ,he is equally a public benefactor1 too1 who produces mental or moral wealth1 as well as physical4 ,in gaming1 it is true1 property is shifted from one individual to another1 and here and there one probably gains more than he loses2 but nothing is actually made1 or produced4 ,if the whole human family were all skilful gamesters1 and should play constantly for a year1 there would not be a dollar more in the world at the end of the year1 than there was at its commencement4 ,on the contrary1 is it not obvious that there would be much less1 besides even an immense loss of time8#i ,but1 secondly1 gaming favors corruption of manners4 ,it is difficult to trace the progress of the gamester's mind1 from the time he commences his downward course1 but we know too well the goal at which he is destined to arrive4 ,there may be exceptions1 but not many2 generally speaking1 every gamester1 sooner or later travels the road to perdition1 and often adds to his own wo1 by dragging others along with him4 ,thirdly1 it discourages industry4 ,he who is accustomed to receive large sums at once1 which bear no sort of proportion to the labor by which they are obtained1 will gradually come to regard the moderate but constant and certain rewards of industrious exertion as insipid4 ,he is also in danger of falling into the habit of paying an undue regard to hazard or chance1 and of becoming devoted to the doctrine of fatality4 ,as to the few who are skilful enough to gain more1 on the whole1 than they lose1 scarcely one of them pays any regard to prudence or economy in his expenditures4 ,what is thus lightly acquired1 is lightly disposed of4 ,or if1 in one instance in a thousand1 it happens otherwise1 the result is still unfavorable4 ,it is but to make the miser still more a miser1 and the covetous only the more so4 ,man is so constituted as to be unable to bear1 with safety1 a rapid accumulation of property4 ,to the truth of this1 all history attests1 whether ancient or modern1 sacred or profane4 ,the famous philosopher ,locke1 in his ',thoughts on ,education1' thus observes3 ',it is certain1 gaming leaves no satisfaction behind it to those who reflect when it is over2 and it no way profits either body or mind4 ,as to their estates1 if it strike so deep as to concern them1 it is a trade then1 and not a recreation1 wherein few thrive2 and at best a thriving gamester has but a poor trade of it1 who fills his pockets at the price of his reputation4' ,in regard to the criminality of the practice1 a late writer has the following striking remarks4 ',as to gaming1 it is always criminal1 either in itself or in its tendency4 ,the basis of it is covetousness2 a desire to take from others something for which you have neither given1 nor intend to give an equivalent4 ,no gambler was ever yet a happy man1 and few gamblers have escaped being positively miserable4 ,remember1 too1 that to game for nothing is still gaming2 and naturally leads to gaming for something4 ,it is sacrificing time1 and that1 too1 for the worst of purposes4 ',i have kept house for nearly forty years2 ,i have reared a family2 ,i have entertained as many friends as most people2 and ,i never had cards1 dice1 a chess board1 nor any implement of gaming under my roof4 ,the hours that young men spend in this way1 are hours murdered2 precious hours that ought to be spent either in reading or in writing2 or in rest2 preparatory to the duties of the dawn4 ',though ,i do not agree with those base flatterers who declare the army to be the best school for statesmen1 it is certainly a school in which we learn1 experimentally1 many useful lessons2 and in this school ,i learned that men fond of gaming1 are rarely1 if ever1 trust-worthy4 ,i have known many a decent man rejected in the way of promotion1 only because he was addicted to gaming4 ,men1 in that state of life1 cannot ruin themselves by gaming1 for they possess no fortune1 nor money2 but the taste for gaming is always regarded as an indication of a radically bad disposition2 and ,i can truly say that ,i never in my whole life--and it has been a long and eventful one--knew a man fond of gaming1 who was not1 in some way or other1 unworthy of confidence4 ,this vice creeps on by very slow degrees1 till1 at last1 it becomes an ungovernable passion1 swallowing up every good and kind feeling of the heart4' ,for my own part ,i know not the names of cards2 and could never take interest enough in card-playing to remember them4 ,i have always wondered how sober and intelligent people1 who have consciences1 and believe the doctrine of accountability to ,god--how professing ,christians even1 as is the case in some parts of this country1 can sit whole evenings at cards4 ,why1 what notions have they of the value of time8 ,can they conceive of ,him1 whose example we are bound to follow1 as engaged in this way8 ,the thought should shock us6 ,what a ,herculean task ,christianity has yet to accomplish6 ,the excess of this vice has caused even the overthrow of empires4 ,it leads to conspiracies1 and creates conspirators4 ,men overwhelmed with debt1 are always ready to obey the orders of any bold chieftain who may attempt a decisive stroke1 even against government itself4 ,catiline had very soon under his command an army of scoundrels4 ',every man1' says ,sallust1 'who by his follies or losses at the gaming table had consumed the inheritance of his fathers1 and all who were sufferers by such misery1 were the friends of this perverse man4' ,perhaps this vice has nowhere been carried to greater excess than in ,france4 ,there it has its administration1 its chief1 its stockholders1 its officers1 and its priests4 ,it has its domestics1 its pimps1 its spies1 its informers1 its assassins1 its bullies1 its aiders1 its abettors1--in fact1 its scoundrels of every description2 particularly its hireling swindlers1 who are paid for decoying the unwary into this 'hell upon earth1' so odious to morality1 and so destructive to virtue and ,christianity4 ,in ,england1 this vice has at all times been looked upon as one of pernicious consequence to the commonwealth1 and has1 therefore1 long been prohibited4 ,the money lost in this way1 is even recoverable again by law4 ,some of the laws on this subject were enacted as early as the time of ,queen ,anne1 and not a few of the penalties are very severe4 ,every species of gambling is strictly forbidden in the ,british army1 and occasionally punished with great severity1 by order of the commander in chief4 ,these facts show the state of public opinion in that country1 in regard to the evil tendency of this practice4 ,men of immense wealth have1 in some instances1 entered gambling houses1 and in the short space of an hour have found themselves reduced to absolute beggary4 ',such men often lose not only what their purses or their bankers can supply1 but houses1 lands1 equipage1 jewels2 in fine1 every thing of which they call themselves masters1 even to their very clothes2 then perhaps a pistol terminates their mortal career4' ,fifteen hours a day are devoted by many infatuated persons in some countries to this unhappy practice4 ,in the middle of the day1 while the wife directs with prudence and economy the administration of her husband's house1 he abandons himself to become the prey of rapacious midnight and mid-day robbers4 ,the result is1 that he contracts debts1 is stripped of his property1 and his wife and children are sent to the alms-house1 whilst he1 perhaps1 perishes in a prison4 ,my life has been chiefly spent in a situation where comparatively little of this vice prevails4 ,yet1 ,i have known one individual who divided his time between hunting and gaming4 ,about four days in the week were regularly devoted to the latter practice4 ,from breakfast to dinner1 from dinner to tea1 from tea to nine o'clock1 this was his regular employment1 and was pursued incessantly4 ,the man was about seventy years of age4 ,he did not play for very large sums1 it is true2 seldom more than five to twenty dollars2 and it was his uniform practice to retire precisely at nine o'clock1 and without supper4 ,generally1 however1 the night is more especially devoted to this employment4 ,i have occasionally been at public houses1 or on board vessels where a company was playing1 and have known many hundreds of dollars lost in a single night4 ,in one instance1 the most horrid midnight oaths and blasphemy were indulged4 ,besides1 there is an almost direct connection between the gambling table and brothel2 and the one is seldom long unaccompanied by the other4 ,scarcely less obvious and direct is the connection between this vice and intemperance4 ,if the drunkard is not always a gamester1 the gamester is almost without exception intemperate4 ,there is for the most part a union of the three--horrible as the alliance may be--,i mean gambling1 intemperance1 and debauchery4 ,there is even a species of intoxication attendant on gambling4 ,rede1 in speaking of one form of this vice which prevails in ,europe1 says2 ',it is1 in fact1 a ,,prompt ,,murderer2 irregular as all other games of hazard--rapid as lightning in its movements--its strokes succeed each other with an activity that redoubles the ardor of the player's blood1 and often deprives him of the advantage of reflection4 ,in fact1 a man after half an hour's play1 who for the whole night may not have taken any thing stronger than water1 has all the appearance of drunkenness4' ,and who has not seen the flushed cheek and the red eye1 produced simply by the excitement of an ordinary gaming table8 ,it is an additional proof of the evil of gaming that every person devoted to it1 feels it to be an evil4 ,why then does he not refrain8 ,because he has sold himself a slave to the deadly habit1 as effectually as the drunkard to his cups4 ,burgh1 in his ,dignity of ,human ,nature1 sums up the evils of this practice in a single paragraph3 ',gaming is an amusement wholly unworthy of rational beings1 having neither the pretence of exercising the body1 of exerting ingenuity1 or of giving any natural pleasure1 and owing its entertainment wholly to an unnatural and vitiated taste2--the cause of infinite loss of time1 of enormous destruction of money1 of irritating the passions1 of stirring up avarice1 of innumerable sneaking tricks and frauds1 of encouraging idleness1 of disgusting people against their proper employments1 and of sinking and debasing all that is truly great and valuable in the mind4' ,let me warn you1 then1 my young readers1--nay1 more1 let me urge you never to enter this dreadful road4 ,shun it as you would the road to destruction4 ,take not the first step1--the moment you do1 all may be lost4 ,say not that you can command yourselves1 and can stop when you approach the confines of danger4 ,so thousands have thought as sincerely as yourselves--and yet they fell4 ',the probabilities that we shall fall where so many have fallen1' says ,dr4 ,dwight1 'are millions to one2 and the contrary opinion is only the dream of lunacy4' ,when you are inclined to think yourselves safe1 consider the multitudes who once felt themselves equally so1 have been corrupted1 distressed1 and ruined by gaming1 both for this world1 and that which is to come4 ,think how many families have been plunged by it in beggary1 and overwhelmed by it in vice4 ,think how many persons have become liars at the gaming table2 how many perjured2 how many drunkards2 how many blasphemers2 how many suicides4 ',if ,europe1' said ,montesquieu1 'is to be ruined1 it will be ruined by gaming4' ,if the ,united ,states are to be ruined1 gaming in some of its forms will be a very efficient agent in accomplishing the work4 ,some of the most common games practised in this country1 are cards1 dice1 billiards1 shooting matches1 and last1 though not least1 lotteries4 ,horse-racing and cockfighting are still in use in some parts of the ,united ,states1 though less so than formerly4 ,in addition to the general remarks already made1 ,i now proceed to notice a few of the particular forms of this vice4 #a4 ,,cards1 ,,dice1 ,,and ,,billiards4 ,the foregoing remarks will be applicable to each of these three modes of gambling4 ,but in regard to cards1 there seems to be something peculiarly enticing4 ,it is on this account that youth are required to be doubly cautious on this point4 ,so bewitching were cards and dice regarded in ,england1 that penalties were laid on those who should be found playing with them1 as early as the reign of ,george ,,ii4 ,card playing1 however1 still prevails in ,europe1 and to a considerable extent in the ,united ,states4 ,there is a very common impression abroad1 that the mere playing at cards is in itself innocent3 that the danger consists in the tendency to excess2 and against excess most people imagine themselves sufficiently secure4 ,but as 'the best throw at dice1 is to throw them away1' so the best move with cards would be1 to commit them to the flames4 #b4 ,,shooting ,,matches4 ,this is a disgraceful practice1 which was formerly in extensive use in these ,states at particular seasons1 especially on the day preceding the annual ,thanksgiving4 ,i am sorry to say1 that there are places where it prevails1 even now4 ,numbers who have nothing better to do1 collect together1 near some tavern or grog-shop1 for the sole purpose of trying their skill at shooting fowls4 ,tied to a stake at a short distance1 a poor innocent and helpless fowl is set as a mark to furnish sport for idle men and boys4 ,could the creature be put out of its misery by the first discharge of the musket1 the evil would not appear so great4 ,but this is seldom the case4 ,several discharges are usually made1 and between each1 a running1 shouting and jumping of the company takes place1 not unfrequently mingled with oaths and curses4 ,the object of this infernal torture being at length despatched1 and suspended on the muzzle of the gun as a trophy of victory1 a rush is made to the bar or counter1 and brandy and rum1 accompanied by lewd stories1 and perhaps quarrelling and drunkenness1 often close the scene4 ,it rarely fails that a number of children are assembled on such occasions1 who listen with high glee to the conversation1 whether in the field or at the inn4 ,if it be the grossest profaneness1 or the coarsest obscenity1 they will sometimes pride themselves in imitating it1 thinking it to be manly2 and in a like spirit will partake of the glass1 and thus commence the drunkard's career4--,this practice is conducted somewhat differently in different places1 but not essentially so4 ,it is much to the credit of the citizens of many parts of ,new ,england that their good sense will not1 any longer1 tolerate a practice so brutal1 and scarcely exceeded in this respect by the cockfights in other parts of the country4 ,as a substitute for this practice a circle is drawn on a board or post1 of a certain size1 and he who can hit within the circle1 gains the fowl4 ,this is still a species of gaming1 but is divested of much of the ferocity and brutality of the former4 #c4 ,,horseracing ,,and ,,cockfighting4 ,it is only in particular sections of the ,united ,states that public opinion tolerates these practices extensively4 ,a horserace1 in ,new ,england1 is a very rare occurrence4 ,a cockfight1 few among us have ever witnessed4 ,wherever the cruel disposition to indulge in seeing animals fight together is allowed1 it is equally degrading to human nature with that fondness which is manifested in other countries for witnessing a bull fight4 ,it is indeed the same disposition1 only existing in a smaller degree in the former case than in the latter4 ,montaigne thinks it a reflection upon human nature itself that few people take delight in seeing beasts caress and play together1 while almost every one is pleased to see them lacerate and worry one another4 ,should your lot be cast in a region where any of these inhuman practices prevail1 let it be your constant and firm endeavor1 not merely to keep aloof from them yourselves1 but to prevail on all those over whom ,god may have given you influence1 to avoid them likewise4 ,to enable you to face the public opinion when a point of importance is at stake1 it will be useful to consult carefully the first chapter of this work4 ,i am sorry to have it in my power to state that in the year #ahcc there was a bull fight four miles southward of ,philadelphia4 ,it was attended by about #aejj persons2 mostly of the very lowest classes from the city4 ,it was marked by many of the same evils which attend these cruel sports in other countries1 and by the same reckless disregard of mercy towards the poor brutes who suffered in the conflict4 ,it is to be hoped1 however1 for the honor of human nature1 that the good sense of the community will not permit this detestable custom to prevail4 #i ,every man who enjoys the privileges of civilized society1 owes it to that society to earn as much as he can2 or1 in other words1 improve every minute of his time4 ,he who loses an hour1 or a minute1 is the price of that hour debtor to the community4 ,moreover1 it is a debt which he can never repay4 ,,section ,,ii4 ,on ,lotteries4 ,lotteries are a species of gambling2 differing from other kinds only in being tolerated either by the law of the land1 or by that of public opinion4 ,the proofs of this assertion are innumerable4 ,not only young men1 but even married women have1 in some instances1 become so addicted to ticket buying1 as to ruin themselves and their families4 ,from the fact that efforts have lately been made in several of the most influential ,states in the ,union to suppress them1 it might seem unnecessary1 at first view1 to mention this subject4 ,but although the letter of the law may oppose them1 there is a portion of our citizens who will continue to buy tickets clandestinely2 and consequently somebody will continue to sell them in the same manner4 ,penalties will not suppress them at once4 ,it will be many years before the evil can be wholly eradicated4 ,the flood does not cease at the moment when the windows of heaven are closed1 but continues1 for some time1 its ravages4 ,it is necessary1 therefore1 that the young should guard themselves against the temptations which they hold out4 ,it may be said that important works1 such as monuments1 and churches1 have been completed by means of lotteries4 ,i know it is so4 ,but the profits which arise from the sale of tickets are a tax upon the community1 and generally upon the poorer classes3 or rather they are a species of swindling4 ,that good is sometimes done with these ill-gotten gains1 is admitted2 but money procured in any other unlawful1 immoral1 or criminal way1 could be applied to build bridges1 roads1 churches1 c4 ,would the advantages thus secured1 however1 justify an unlawful means of securing them8 ,does the end sanctify the means8 ,it is said1 too1 that individuals1 as well as associations1 have been1 in a few instances1 greatly aided by prizes in lotteries4 ,some bankrupts have paid their debts1 like honest men1 with them4 ,this they might do with stolen money4 ,but cases of even this kind1 are rare4 ,the far greater part of the money drawn in the form of prizes in lotteries1 only makes its possessor more avaricious1 covetous1 or oppressive than before4 ,money obtained in this manner commonly ruins mind1 body1 or estate2 sometimes all three4 ,lottery schemes have been issued in the single ,state of ,new ,york1 in twelve years1 to the amount of #cg1jjj1jjj4 ,if other ,states have engaged in the business1 in the same proportion to their population1 the sum of all the schemes issued in the ,united ,states within that time has been #bdj1jjj1jjj4 ,a sum sufficient to maintain in comfort1 if not affluence1 the entire population of some of the smaller ,states for more than thirty years4 ,now what has been gained by all this8 ,it is indeed true1 that the discount on this sum1 amounting to #cf1jjj1jjj1 has been expended in paying a set of men for one species of labor4 ,if we suppose their average salary to have been #ejj1 no less than #f1jjj clerks1 managers1 c41 may have obtained by this means1 a support during the last twelve years4 ,but what have the #f1jjj men produced all this while8 ,has not their whole time been spent in receiving small sums 7from five to fifty dollars7 from individuals1 putting them together1 as it were1 in a heap1 and afterwards distributing a part of it in sums1 with a few exceptions1 equally small8--,have they added one dollar1 or even one cent to the original stock8 ,i have already admitted1 that he who makes two blades of grass grow where only one grew before1 is a benefactor to his country2 but these men have not done so much as that4 ,a few draw prizes1 it has been admitted4 ,some of that few make a good use of them4 ,but the vast majority are injured4 ,they either become less active and industrious1 or more parsimonious and miserly2 and not a few become prodigals or bankrupts at once4 ,in any of these events1 they are of course unfitted for the essential purposes of human existence4 ,it is not given to humanity to bear a sudden acquisition of wealth4 ,the best of men are endangered by it4 ,as in knowledge1 so in the present case1 what is gained by hard digging is usually retained2 and what is gained easily usually goes quickly4 ,there is this difference1 however1 that the moral character is usually lost with the one1 but not always with the other4 ,these are a part of the evils connected with lotteries4 ,to compute their sum total would be impossible4 ,the immense waste of money and time 7and time is money7 by those persons who are in the habit of buying tickets1 to say nothing of the cigars smoked1 the spirits1 wine1 and ale drank1 the suppers eaten1 and the money lost at cards1 while lounging about lottery offices1 although even this constitutes but a part of the waste1 is absolutely incalculable4 ,the suffering of wives1 and children1 and parents1 and brothers1 and sisters1 together with that loss of health1 and temper1 and reputation1 which is either directly or indirectly connected1 would swell the sum to an amount sufficient to alarm every one1 who intends to be an honest1 industrious1 and respectable citizen4 ,it is yours1 my young friends1 to put a stop to this tremendous evil4 ,it is your duty1 and it should be your pleasure1 to give that tone to the public sentiment1 without which1 in governments like this1 written laws are powerless4 ,do not say that the influence of one person cannot effect much4 ,remember that the power of example is almost omnipotent4 ,in debating whether you may not venture to buy one more ticket1 remember that if you do so1 you adopt a course which1 if taken by every other individual in the ,united ,states 7and who out of thirteen millions has not the same right as yourself87 would give abundant support to the whole lottery system1 with all its horrors4 ,and could you in that case remain guiltless8 ,can the fountains of such a sickly stream be pure8 ,you would not surely condemn the waters of a mighty river while you were one of a company engaged in filling the springs and rills that unite to form it4 ,remember that just in proportion as you contribute1 by your example1 to discourage this species of gambling1 just in the same proportion will you contribute to stay the progress of a tremendous scourge1 and to enforce the execution of good and salutary laws4 ,with this pernicious practice1 ,i have always been decidedly at war4 ,i believe the system to be wholly wrong1 and that those who countenance it1 in any way whatever1 are wholly inexcusable4 ,,section ,,iii4 ,on ,theatres4 ,much is said by the friends of theatres about what they might be2 and not a few persons indulge the hope that the theatre may yet be made a school of morality4 ,but my business at present is with it as it is1 and as it has hitherto been4 ,the reader will be more benefited by existing facts than sanguine anticipations1 or visionary predictions4 ,a ,german medical writer calculates that one in #aej of those who frequently attend theatres become diseased and die1 from the impurity of the atmosphere4 ,the reason is1 that respiration contaminates the air2 and where large assemblies are collected in close rooms1 the air is corrupted much more rapidly than many are aware4 ,lavoisier1 the ,french chemist1 states1 that in a theatre1 from the commencement to the end of the play1 the oxygen or vital air is diminished in the proportion of from #bg to #ba1 or nearly one fourth2 and consequently is in the same proportion less fit for respiration1 than it was before4 ,this is probably the general truth2 but the number of persons present1 and the amount of space1 must determine1 in a great measure1 the rapidity with which the air is corrupted4 ,the pit is the most unhealthy part of a play-house1 because the carbonic acid which is formed by respiration is heavier than atmospheric air1 and accumulates near the floor4 ,it is painful to look round on a gay audience of #aejj persons1 and consider that ten of this number will die in consequence of breathing the bad air of the room so frequently1 and so long4 ,but ,i believe this estimate is quite within bounds4 ,there are however other results to be dreaded4 ,the practice of going out of a heated1 as well as an impure atmosphere late in the evening1 and often without sufficient clothing1 exposes the individual to cold1 rheumatism1 pleurisy1 and fever4 ,many a young lady1--and1 ,i fear1 not a few young gentlemen1--get the consumption by taking colds in this manner4 ,not only the health of the body1 but the mind and morals1 too1 are often injured4 ,dr4 ,griscom1 of ,new ,york1 in a report on the causes of vice and crime in that city1 made a few years since1 says2 ',among the causes of vicious excitement in our city1 none appear to be so powerful in their nature as theatrical amusements4 ,the number of boys and young men who have become determined thieves1 in order to procure the means of introduction to the theatres and circuses1 would appal the feelings of every virtuous mind1 could the whole truth be laid open before them4 ',in the case of the feebler sex1 the result is still worse4 ,a relish for the amusements of the theatre1 without the means of indulgence1 becomes too often a motive for listening to the first suggestion of the seducer1 and thus prepares the unfortunate captive of sensuality for the haunts of infamy1 and a total destitution of all that is valuable in the mind and character of woman4' ,the following fact is worthy of being considered by the friends and patrons of theatres4 ,during the progress of one of the most ferocious revolutions which ever shocked the face of heaven1 theatres1 in ,paris alone1 multiplied from six to twenty-five4 ,now one of two conclusions follow from this3 ,either the spirit of the times produced the institutions1 or the institutions cherished the spirit of the times2 and this will certainly prove that they are either the parents of vice or the offspring of it4 ,the philosopher ,plato assures us1 that 'plays raise the passions1 and prevent the use of them2 and of course are dangerous to morality4' ',the seeing of ,comedies1' says ,aristotle1 'ought to be forbidden to young people1 till age and discipline have made them proof against debauchery4' ,tacitus says1 ',the ,german women were guarded against danger1 and preserved their purity by having no play-houses among them4' ,even ,ovid represents theatrical amusements as a grand source of corruption1 and he advised ,augustus to suppress them4 ,the infidel philosopher ,rousseau1 declared himself to be of opinion1 that the theatre is1 in all cases1 a school of vice4 ,though he had himself written for the stage1 yet1 when it was proposed to establish a theatre in the city of ,geneva1 he wrote against the project with zeal and great force1 and expressed the opinion that every friend of pure morals ought to oppose it4 ,sir ,john ,hawkins1 in his life of ,johnson1 observes3--',although it is said of plays that they teach morality1 and of the stage that it is the mirror of human life1 these assertions are mere declamation1 and have no foundation in truth or experience4 ,on the contrary1 a play-house1 and the regions about it1 are the very hot-beds of vice4' ,archbishop ,tillotson1 after some pointed and forcible reasoning against it1 pronounces the play-house to be 'the devil's chapel1' 'a nursery of licentiousness and vice1' and 'a recreation which ought not to be allowed among a civilized1 much less a ,christian people4' ,bishop ,collier solemnly declared1 that he was persuaded that 'nothing had done more to debauch the age in which he lived1 than the stage poets and the play-house4' ,sir ,matthew ,hale1 having in early life experienced the pernicious effects of attending the theatre1 resolved1 when he came to ,london1 never to see a play again1 and to this resolution he adhered through life4 ,burgh says2 ',what does it avail that the piece itself be unexceptionable1 if it is to be interlarded with lewd songs or dances1 and tagged at the conclusion with a ludicrous and beastly farce8 ,i cannot therefore1 in conscience1 give youth any other advice than to avoid such diversions as cannot be indulged without the utmost danger of perverting their taste1 and corrupting their morals4' ,dr4 ,johnson's testimony on this subject is nearly as pointed as that of ,archbishop ,tillotson2 and ,lord ,kaimes speaks with much emphasis of the 'poisonous influence1' of theatres4 ,their evil tendency is seldom better illustrated than by the following anecdote1 from an individual in ,new ,york1 on whose statements we may place the fullest reliance4 ',f4 ,b4 a young man of about twenty-two1 called on the writer in the fall of #ahca for employment4 ,he was a journeyman printer2 was recently from ,kentucky2 and owing to his want of employment1 as he said1 was entirely destitute1 not only of the comforts1 but the necessaries of life4 ,i immediately procured him a respectable boarding house1 gave him employment1 and rendered his situation as comfortable as my limited means would permit4 ',he had not been with me long1 before he expressed a desire to go to the theatre4 ,some great actor was to perform on a certain night1 and he was very anxious to see him4 ,i warned him of the consequences1 and told him1 my own experience and observation had convinced me that it was a very dangerous place for young men to visit4 ,but my warning did no good4 ,he neglected his business1 and went4 ,i reproved him gently1 but retained him in my employment4 ,he continued to go1 notwithstanding all my remonstrances to the contrary4 ,at length my business suffered so much from his neglecting to attend to it as he ought1 that ,i was under the necessity of discharging him in self-defence4 ,he got temporary employment in different offices of the city1 where the same fault was found with him4 ,immediately after1 he accepted a situation of bar-keeper in a porter house or tavern attached to the theatre4 ,his situation he did not hold long--from what cause1 ,i know not4 ',he again applied to me for work2 but as his habits were not reformed1 ,i did not think it prudent to employ him1 although ,i said or did nothing to injure him in the estimation of others4 ,disappointed in procuring employment in a business to which he had served a regular apprenticeship1 being pennyless1 and seeing no bright prospect for the future1 he enlisted as a common soldier in the ,united ,states' service4 ',he had not been in his new vocation long1 before he was called upon1 with other troops1 to defend our citizens from the attacks of the ,indians4 ,but when the troops had nearly reached their place of destination1 that 'invisible scourge1' the cholera1 made its appearance among them4 ,desertion was the consequence1 and among others who fled1 was the subject of this article4 ',he returned to ,new ,york--made application at several different offices for employment1 without success4 ,in a few days news came that he had been detected in pilfering goods from the house of his landlord4 ,a warrant was immediately issued for him--he was seized1 taken to the police office--convicted1 and sentenced to six months' hard labor in the penitentiary4 ,his name being published in the newspapers1 in connection with those of other convicts--was immediately recognised by the officer under whom he had enlisted4--,this officer proceeds to the city--claims the prisoner--and it is at length agreed that he shall return to the ,united ,states' service1 where he shall1 for the first six months1 be compelled to roll sand as a punishment for desertion1 serve out the five years for which he had enlisted1 and then be given up to the city authorities1 to suffer for the crime of pilfering4 ',it is thus that we see a young man1 of good natural abilities1 scarcely twenty-three years of age1 compelled to lose six of the most valuable years of his life1 besides ruining a fair reputation1 and bringing disgrace upon his parents and friends1 from the apparently harmless desire of seeing dramatic performances4 ,ought not this to be a warning to others1 who are travelling on1 imperceptibly in the same road to ruin8' 99 99 99 99 99 ,theatres are of ancient date4 ,one built of wood1 in the time of ,cicero and ,caesar1 would contain #hj1jjj persons4 ,the first stone theatre in ,rome1 was built by ,pompey1 and would contain #dj1jjj4 ,there are one or two in ,europe1 at the present time1 that will accommodate #d1jjj or #e1jjj4 ,in ,england1 until #affj1 public opinion did not permit females to perform in theatres1 but the parts were performed by boys4 ,if theatres have a reforming tendency1 this result might have been expected in ,france1 where they have so long been popular and flourishing4 ,in #ahjg1 there were in ,france #aff theatres1 and #cifh performers4 ,in #ahcb there were in ,paris alone #ag1 which could accommodate #ba1jjj persons4 ,but we do not find that they reformed the ,parisians2 and it is reasonable to expect they never will4 ,let young men remember1 that in this1 as well as in many other things1 there is only one point of security1 viz4 total abstinence4 ,,section ,,iv4 ,use of ,tobacco4 #a4 ,,smoking4 ,smoking has every where1 in ,europe and ,america1 become a tremendous evil2 and if we except ,holland and ,germany1 nowhere more so than in this country4 ,indeed we are already fast treading in the steps of those countries1 and the following vivid description of the miseries which this filthy practice entails on the ,germans will soon be quite applicable to the people of the ,united ,states1 unless we can induce the rising generation to turn the current of public opinion against it4 ',this plague1 like the ,egyptian plague of frogs1 is felt every where1 and in every thing4 ,it poisons the streets1 the clubs1 and the coffee-houses2--furniture1 clothes1 equipage1 persons1 are redolent of the abomination4 ,it makes even the dulness of the newspapers doubly narcotic3 every eatable and drinkable1 all that can be seen1 felt1 heard or understood1 is saturated with tobacco2--the very air we breathe is but a conveyance for this poison into the lungs2 and every man1 woman1 and child1 rapidly acquires the complexion of a boiled chicken4 ,from the hour of their waking1 if nine-tenths of their population can be said to awake at all1 to the hour of their lying down1 the pipe is never out of their mouths4 ,one mighty fumigation reigns1 and human nature is smoked dry by tens of thousands of square miles4 ,the ,german physiologists compute1 that of #bj deaths1 between eighteen and thirty-five years1 #aj originate in the waste of the constitution by smoking4' ,this is indeed a horrid picture2 but when it is considered that the best estimates which can be made concur in showing that tobacco1 to the amount of #af1jjj1jjj1 is consumed in the ,united ,states annually1 and that by far the greater part of this is in smoking cigars1 there is certainly room for gloomy apprehensions4 ,what though we do not use the dirty pipe of the ,dutch and ,germans8 ,if we only use the tobacco1 the mischief is effectually accomplished4 ,perhaps it were even better that we should lay out a part of our money for pipes1 than to spend the whole for tobacco4 ,smoking is indecent1 filthy1 and rude1 and to many individuals highly offensive4 ,when first introduced into ,europe1 in the #afth century1 its use was prohibited under very severe penalties1 which in some countries amounted even to cutting off the nose4 ,and how much better is the practice of voluntarily burning up our noses1 by making a chimney of them8 ,i am happy1 however1 in being able to state1 that this unpardonable practice is now abandoned in many of the fashionable societies in ,europe4 ,there is one remarkable fact to be observed in speaking on this subject4 ,no parent ever teaches his child the use of tobacco1 or even encourages it1 except by his example4 ,thus the smoker virtually condemns himself in the very 'thing which he alloweth4' ,it is not precisely so in the case of spirits2 for many parents directly encourage the use of that4 ,tobacco is one of the most powerful poisons in nature4 ,even the physician1 some of whose medicines are so active that a few grains1 or a few drops1 will destroy life at once1 finds tobacco too powerful for his use2 and in those cases where it is most clearly required1 only makes it a last resort4 ,its daily use1 in any form1 deranges1 and sometimes destroys the stomach and nerves1 produces weakness1 low spirits1 dyspepsy1 vertigo1 and many other complaints4 ,these are its more immediate effects4 ,its remoter effects are scarcely less dreadful4 ,it dries the mouth and nostrils1 and probably the brain2 benumbs the senses of smell and taste1 impairs the hearing1 and ultimately the eye-sight4 ,germany1 a smoking nation1 is at the same time1 a spectacled nation4 ,more than all this2 it dries the blood2 creates thirst and loss of appetite2 and in this and other ways1 often lays the foundation of intemperance4 ,in fact1 not a few persons are made drunkards by this very means4 ,dr4 ,rush has a long chapter on this subject in one of his volumes1 which is well worth your attention4 ,in addition to all this1 it has often been observed that in fevers and other diseases1 medicines never operate well in constitutions which have been accustomed to the use of tobacco4 ,of the expense which the use of it involves1 ,i have already spoken4 ,of the #af1jjj1jjj thus expended1 #i1jjj1jjj are supposed to be for smoking ,spanish cigars2 #f1ejj1jjj for smoking ,american tobacco1 and for chewing it2 and #ejj1jjj for snuff4 ,although many people of real intelligence become addicted to this practice1 as is the case especially among the learned in ,germany1 yet it cannot be denied that in general1 those individuals and nations whose mental powers are the weakest1 are 7in proportion to their means of acquiring it7 most enslaved to it4 ,to be convinced of the truth of this remark1 we have only to open our eyes to facts as they exist around us4 ,all ignorant and savage nations indulge in extraordinary stimulants1 7and tobacco among the rest17 whenever they have the means of obtaining them2 and in proportion to their degradation4 ,thus it is with the native tribes of ,north ,america2 thus with the natives of ,africa1 ,asia1 and ,new ,holland2 thus with the ,cretins and ,gypsies4 ,zimmerman says1 that the latter 'suspended their predatory excursions1 and on an appointed evening in every week1 assemble to enjoy their guilty spoils in the fumes of strong waters and tobacco4' ,here they are represented as indulging in idle tales about the character and conduct of those around them2 a statement which can very easily be believed by those who have watched the effects produced by the fumes of stimulating beverages much more 'respectable' than spirits or tobacco smoke4 ,the quantity which is used in civilized nations is almost incredibly great4 ,england alone imported1 in #ahbi1 #bb1djj1jjj lbs4 of unmanufactured tobacco4 ,there is no narcotic plant--not even the tea plant--in such extensive use1 unless it is the betel of ,india and the adjoining countries4 ,this is the leaf of a climbing plant resembling ivy1 but of the pepper tribe4 ,the people of the east chew it so incessantly1 and in such quantities1 that their lips become quite red1 and their teeth black--showing that it has affected their whole systems4 ,they carry it about them in boxes1 and offer it to each other in compliment1 as the ,europeans do snuff2 and it is considered uncivil and unkind to refuse to accept and chew it4 ,this is done by the women as well as by the men4 ,were we disposed1 we might draw from this fact many important lessons on our own favored stimulants4 ,in view of the great and growing evil of smoking1 the practical question arises2 ',what shall be done8' ,the answer is--,render it unfashionable and disreputable4 ,do you ask1 ',how is this to be accomplished8' ,why1 how has alcohol been rendered unpopular8 ,do you still say1 ',one person alone cannot effect much8' ,but so might any person have said a few years ago1 in regard to spirits4 ,individuals must commence the work of reformation in the one case1 as well as in the other2 and success will then be equally certain4 #b4 ,,chewing4 ,many of the remarks already made apply with as much force to the use of tobacco in every form1 as to the mere habit of smoking4 ,but ,i have a few additional thoughts on chewing this plant4 ,there are never wanting excuses for any thing which we feel strongly inclined to do4 ,thus a thousand little frivolous pleas are used for chewing tobacco4 ,one man of reputed good sense told me that his tobacco probably cost him nothing1 for if he did not use it1 he 'should be apt to spend as much worth of time in picking and eating summer fruits1 as would pay for it4' ,now ,i do not like the practice of eating even summer fruits between meals2 but they are made to be eaten moderately1 no doubt2 and if people will not eat them with their food1 it is generally a less evil to eat them between meals1 than not at all4 ,but the truth is1 tobacco chewers never relish these things at any time4 ,the only plea for chewing this noxious plant1 which is entitled to a serious consideration is1 that it tends to preserve the teeth4 ,this is the strong hold of tobacco chewers--not1 generally1 when they commence the practice1 but as soon as they find themselves slaves to it4 ,now the truth appears to be this3 #a4 ',when a tooth is decayed in such a manner as to leave the nerve exposed1 there is no doubt that the powerful stimulus of tobacco must greatly diminish its sensibility4 ,but there are very many other substances1 less poisonous1 whose occasional application would accomplish the same result1 and without deadening1 at the same time1 the sensibilities of the whole system1 as tobacco does4 #b4 ,the person who chews tobacco1 generally puts a piece in his mouth immediately after eating4 ,this is immediately moved from place to place1 and not only performs1 in some measure1 the offices of a brush and toothpick1 but produces a sudden flow of saliva2 and in consequence of both of these causes combined1 the teeth are effectually cleansed2 and cleanliness is undoubtedly one of the most effectual preventives of decay in teeth yet known4 ,yet there are far better means of cleansing the mouth and teeth after eating than by means of tobacco4 ,if there be any other known reasons why tobacco should preserve teeth1 ,i am ignorant of them4 ,there are then no arguments of any weight for using it2 while there are a multitude of very strong reasons against it4 ,i might add them1 in this place1 but it appears to me unnecessary4 #c4 ,,taking ,,snuff4 ,i have seen many individuals who would not1 on any account whatever1 use spirits1 or chew tobacco2 but who would not hesitate to dry up their nasal membranes1 injure their speech1 induce catarrhal affections1 and besmear their face1 clothes1 books1 c4 with snuff4 ,this1 however common1 appears to me ridiculous4 ,almost all the serious evils which result from smoking and chewing1 follow the practice of snuffing powdered tobacco into the nose4 ,even ,chesterfield opposes it1 when after characterizing all use of tobacco or snuff1 in any form1 as both vulgar and filthy1 he adds3 ',besides1 snuff-takers are generally very dull and shallow people1 and have recourse to it merely as a fillip to the brain2 by all means1 therefore1 avoid the filthy custom4' ,this censure1 though rather severe1 is equally applicable to smoking and chewing4 ,naturalists say there is one species of maggot fly that mistakes the odor of some kinds of snuff for that of putrid substances1 and deposits its eggs in it4 ,in warm weather therefore1 it must be dangerous to take snuff which has been exposed to these insects2 for the eggs sometimes hatch in two hours1 and the most tremendous consequences might follow4 ,and it is not impossible that some of the most painful diseases to which the human race are liable1 may have been occasionally produced by this or a similar cause4 ,the 'tic douloureux' is an example4 ,a very common disease in sheep is known to be produced by worms in cavities which communicate with the nose4 ,only a little acquaintance with the human structure would show that there are a number of cavities in the bones of the face and head1 some of which will hold half an ounce each1 which communicate with the nose1 and into which substances received into this organ occasionally fall1 but cannot escape as easily as they enter4 ,,section ,v4 ,useful ,recreations4 ,the young1 ,i shall be told1 must and will have their recreations2 and if they are to be denied every species of gaming1 what shall they do8 ',you would not1 surely1 have them spend their leisure hours in gratifying the senses2 in eating1 drinking1 and licentiousness4' ,by no means4 ,recreations they must have2 active recreation1 too1 in the open air4 ,some of the most appropriate are playing ball1 quoits1 ninepins1 and other athletic exercises2 but in no case for money1 or any similar consideration4 ,skating is a good exercise in its proper season1 if followed with great caution4 ,dancing1 for those who sit much1 such as pupils in school1 tailors and shoemakers1 would be an appropriate exercise1 if it were not perpetually abused4 ,by assembling in large crowds1 continuing it late at evening1 and then sallying out in a perspiration1 into the cold or damp night air1 a thousand times more mischief has been done1 than all the benefit which it has afforded would balance4 ,it were greatly to be wished that this exercise might be regulated by those rules which human experience has indicated1 instead of being subject to the whim and caprice of fashion4 ,it is a great pity an exercise so valuable to the sedentary1 and especially those who sit much1 of both sexes1 should be so managed as to injure half the world1 and excite against it the prejudices of the other half4 ,i have said that the young must have recreations1 and generally in the open air4 ,the reason why they should usually be conducted in the open air1 is1 that their ordinary occupations too frequently confine them within doors1 and of course in an atmosphere more or less vitiated4 ,farmers1 gardeners1 rope makers1 and persons whose occupations are of an active nature1 do not need out-of-door sports at all4 ,their recreations should be by the fire side4 ,not with cards or dice1 nor in the company of those whose company is not worth having4 ,but the book1 the newspaper1 conversation1 or the lyceum1 will be the appropriate recreations for these classes1 and will be found in the highest degree satisfactory4 ,for the evening1 the lyceum is particularly adapted1 because laboring young men are often too much fatigued at night1 to think1 closely2 and the lyceum1 or conversation1 will be more agreeable1 and not less useful4 ,but the family circle may of itself constitute a lyceum1 and the book or the newspaper may be made the subject of discussion4 ,i have known the heads of families in one neighborhood greatly improved1 and the whole neighborhood derive an impulse1 from the practice of meeting one evening in the week1 to read the news together1 and converse on the more interesting intelligence of the day4 ,some strongly recommend 'the sports of the field1' and talk with enthusiasm of 'hunting1 coursing1 fishing2' and of 'dogs and horses4' ,but these are no recreations for me4 ,true they are healthy to the body2 but not to the morals4 ,this ,i say confidently1 although some of my readers may smile1 and call it an affectation of sensibility4 ,yet with ,cowper1 ',i would not enter on my list of friends ,the man who needlessly sets foot upon a worm4' ,if the leading objects of field sports were to procure sustenance1 ,i would not say a word4 ,but the very term sports1 implies something different4 ,and shall we sport with life--even that of the inferior animals8 ,that which we cannot give1 shall we presumptuously dare to take away1 and as our only apology say1 ',am ,i not in sport8' ,besides1 other amusements equally healthy1 and if we are accustomed to them1 equally pleasant1 and much more rational1 can be substituted4 ,what they are1 ,i have mentioned1 at least in part4 ,how a sensible man1 and especially a ,christian1 can hunt or fish1 when he would not do it1 were it not for the pleasure he enjoys in the cruelty it involves2--how1 above all1 a wise father can recommend it to his children1 or to others1 ,i am utterly unable to conceive6 ,,chapter ,,iv4 ,improvement of the ,mind4 ,,section ,i4 ,habit of ,observation4 ',your eyes open1 your thoughts close1 will go safe through the world1' is a maxim which some have laid down2 but it savors rather too much of selfishness4 ',you may learn from others all you can1 but you are to give them as little opportunity as possible for learning from you1' seems to be the language1 properly interpreted4 ,suppose every one took the advice1 and endeavored to keep his thoughts close1 for fear he should either be misunderstood1 or thought wanting in wisdom2 what would become of the pleasures of conversation8 ,yet these make up a very considerable item of the happiness of human life4 ,i have sometimes thought with ,dr4 ,rush1 that taciturnity1 though often regarded as a mark of wisdom1 is rather the effect of a 'want of ideas4' ,the doctor mentions the taciturnity of the ,american ,indians as a case in point4 ,even in civilized company1 he believes that with one or two exceptions1 an indisposition to join in conversation 'in nine cases out of ten1 is a mark of stupidity1' and presently adds2 ',ideas1 whether acquired from books or by reflection1 produce a plethora in the mind1 which can only be relieved by depletion from the pen or tongue4' ',keep your eyes open1' however1 is judicious advice4 ,how many who have the eyes of their body open1 keep the eyes of the soul perpetually shut up4 ',seeing1 they see not4' ,such persons1 on arriving at the age of three or four score1 may lay claim to superior wisdom on account of superior age1 but their claims ought not to be admitted4 ,a person who has the eyes both of his mind and body open1 will derive more wisdom from one year's experience1 than those who neglect to observe for themselves1 from ten4 ,thus at thirty1 with ten years acquaintance with men1 manners and things1 a person may be wiser than another at three times thirty1 with seven times ten years of what he calls experience4 ,sound practical wisdom1 cannot1 it is true1 be rapidly acquired any where but in the school of experience1 but the world abounds with men who are old enough to be wise1 and yet are very ignorant4 ,let it be your fixed resolution not to belong to this class4 ,but in order to have the mental eyes open1 the external eyes should be active4 ,we should1 as a general rule1 see what is going on around us4 ,there are indeed seasons1 occurring in the school or the closet1 when abstraction is desirable2 but speaking generally1 we should 'keep our eyes open4' ,it is hence easy to see why some men who are accounted learned1 are yet in common life very great fools4 ,is it not because their eyes have been shut to every thing but books1 and schools1 and colleges1 and universities8 ,the late ,dr4 ,dwight was an eminent instance of keeping up an acquaintance both with books1 and the world in which he lived and acted4 ,in his walks1 or wherever he happened to be1 nothing could escape his eye4 ',not a bird could fly up1' says one of his students1 'but he observed it4' ,and he endeavored to establish the same habit of observation in others4 ,riding in a chaise1 one day1 with a student of his1 who was apt to be abstracted from surrounding things1 he suddenly exclaimed1 almost indignant at his indifference1 ',s---- keep your eyes open6' ,the lesson was not lost4 ,it made a deep impression on the mind of the student4 ,though by no means distinguished in his class1 he has outstripped many1 if not the most of them1 in actual and practical usefulness2 and to this hour1 he attributes much of his success to the foregoing circumstance4 ,there is a pedantry in these things1 however1 which is not only fulsome1 but tends to defeat our very purpose4 ,it is not quite sufficient that we merely bestow a passing glance on objects1 they must strike deep4 ,if they do not1 they had better not have been seen at all2 since the habit of 'seeing not1' while we appear to 'see1' has been all the while strengthening4 ,it cannot be denied that a person who shall take the advice ,i have given1 may1 with a portion of his fellow men1 gain less credit than if he adopted a different course4 ,there is a certain surgeon1 in one of the ,new ,england ,states1 who has acquired much popularity by reading as he travels along4 ,seldom or never1 say his admirers1 is he seen in his carriage without a book in his hand1 or at his side4 ,but such popularity is usually of a mushroom character4 ,there may be pressing occasions which render it the duty of a surgeon to consult his books1 while in his carriage2 but these occasions can never be of frequent occurrence4 ,it is far better that he should be reading lessons from the great and open volume of nature4 ,nor does it add1 in any degree1 to the just respect due to the wisdom of either of the ,plinys1 that the elder 'never travelled without a book and a portable writing desk by his side1' and that the younger read upon all occasions1 whether riding1 walking1 or sitting4' ,i cannot doubt that1 wise as they were in books and philosophy1 they would have secured a much greater fund of practical wisdom1 had they left their books and writing desks at home1 and 'kept their eyes open' to surrounding objects4 ,there is another thing mentioned of ,pliny the elder1 which is equally objectionable4 ,it is said that a person read to him during his meals4 ,i have given my views on this point in ,chapter ,i4 ,,section ,,ii4 ,rules for ,conversation4 ,the bee has the art of extracting honey from every flower which contains it1 even from some which are not a little nauseous or poisonous4 ,it has also been said that the conversation of every individual1 whatever may be the condition of his mind or circumstances1 may be made a means of improvement4 ,how happy would it be1 then1 if man possessed the skill of the bee1 and knew how to extract the good1 and reject the bad or useless6 ,something on this subject is1 indeed1 known4 ,there are rules1 by the observance of which we may derive much valuable information from the conversation of those among whom we live1 even though it should relate to the most ordinary subjects and concerns4 ,and not only so1 we may often devise means to change the conversation1 either directly1 by gradually introducing other topics of discourse1 or indirectly1 by patient attempts to enlarge and improve and elevate the minds of our associates4 ,every individual has excellences2 and almost every person1 however ignorant1 has thought upon some one subject more than many1--perhaps most--others4 ,some excel in the knowledge of husbandry1 some in gardening1 some in mechanics1 or manufactures1 some in mathematics1 and so on4 ,in all your conversation1 then1 it will be well to ascertain as nearly as you can wherein the skill and excellence of an individual lies1 and put him upon his favorite subject4 ,nor is this difficult4 ,every one will1 of his own accord1 fall to talking on his favorite topic1 if you will follow1 and not attempt to lead him4 ,except in a few rare cases1 every one wishes to be the hero of the circle where he is conversing4 ,if1 therefore1 you seek to improve in the greatest possible degree1 from the conversation of those among whom you may be thrown1 you will suffer a companion to take his own course1 and 'out of the abundance of his heart1' let his 'mouth speak4' ,by this means you may easily collect the worth and excellence of every one you meet with2 and be able to put it together for your own use upon future occasions4 ,the common objections to the views here presented1 are1 that they encourage dissimulation4 ,but this does not appear to me to be the fact4 ,in suffering a person1 for the space of a single conversation1 to be the hero of the circle1 we do not of necessity concede his superiority generally2 we only help him to be useful to the company4 ,it often happens that you are thrown among persons whom you cannot benefit by becoming the hero of the circle yourself1 for they will not listen to you2 and perhaps will not understand your terms1 if they do4 ,if1 however1 there appear to be others in the company whose object1 like your own1 is improvement1 you might expose yourself to the just charge of being selfish1 should you refuse to converse upon your own favorite topics in your turn2 and thus to let the good deed go round4 ,never interrupt another1 but hear him out4 ,you will understand him the better for it1 and be able to give him the better answer4 ,if you only give him an opportunity1 he may say something which you have not yet heard1 or explain what you did not fully understand1 or even mention something which you did not expect4 ,there are individuals with whom you may occasionally come in contact1 from whose conversation you will hardly derive much benefit at all4 ,such are those who use wanton1 or obscene1 or profane language4 ,for1 besides the almost utter hopelessness of deriving any benefit from such persons1 and the pain you must inevitably suffer in hearing them1 you put your own reputation at hazard4 ',a man is known by the company he keeps2' take care therefore how you frequent the company of the swearer or the sensualist4 ,avoid1 too1 the known liar1 for similar reasons4 ,if you speak in company1 it is not only modest but wise to speak late2 for by this means1 you will be able to render your conversation more acceptable1 and to weigh beforehand the importance of what you utter2 and you will be less likely to violate the good old rule1 'think twice before you speak once4' ,let your words be as few as will express the sense which you wish to convey1 especially when strangers or men of much greater experience than yourself are present2 and above all1 be careful that what you say be strictly true4 ,do not suffer your feelings to betray you into too great earnestness1 or vehemence2 and never be overbearing4 ,avoid triumphing over an antagonist1 even though you might reasonably do so4 ,you gain nothing4 ,on the contrary1 you often confirm him in his erroneous opinions4 ,at least1 you prejudice him against yourself4 ,zimmerman insists that we should suffer an antagonist to get the victory over us occasionally1 in order to raise his respect for himself4 ,all finesse of this kind1 however1 as ,christians1 ,i think it better to avoid4 ,,section ,,iii4 ,on ,books1 and ,study4 ,it may excite some surprise that books1 and study1 do not occupy a more conspicuous place in this work4 ,there are several reasons for this circumstance4 ,the first is1 a wish to counteract the prevailing tendency to make too much of books as a means of forming character4 ,the second is1 because the choice of these depends more upon parents and teachers than upon the individual himself2 and if they have neglected to lay the foundation of a desire for mental improvement1 there is less probability that any advice ,i may give on this subject will be serviceable1 than on most others4 ,and yet1 no young man1 at any age1 ought to despair of establishing such habits of body and mind as he believes would contribute to his usefulness4 ,he hates the sight of a book perhaps2 but what then8 ,this prejudice may1 in a measure1 be removed4 ,not at once1 it is true1 but gradually4 ,not by compelling himself to read or study against his inclination2 for little will be accomplished when it goes 'against the grain4' ,but there are means better and more effective than these2 some of which ,i will now proceed to point out4 ,let him attach himself to some respectable lyceum or debating society4 ,most young men are willing to attend a lyceum1 occasionally2 and thanks to the spirit of the times and those who have zealously labored to produce the present state of things1 these institutions every where abound4 ,let him now and then take part in a discussion1 if it be1 at first1 only to say a few words4 ,the moment he can awaken an interest in almost any subject whatever1 that moment he will1 of necessity1 seek for information in regard to it4 ,he will seek it1 not only in conversation1 but in newspapers4 ,these1 if well selected1 will in their turn refer him to books of travels4 ,gradually he will find histories1 if not written in too dry a manner1 sources of delight4 ,thus he will proceed1 step by step1 till he finds himself quite attached to reading of various descriptions4 ,there is one caution to be observed here1 which is1 not to read too long or too much at once4 ,whenever a book1 or even a newspaper1 begins to be irksome1 let it be laid aside for the time4 ,in this way you will return to it1 at the next leisure moment1 with increased pleasure4 ,a course not unlike that which ,i have been describing1 faithfully and perseveringly followed1 would in nine cases in ten1 be successful4 ,indeed1 ,i never yet knew of a single failure4 ,one great point is1 to be thoroughly convinced of its importance4 ,no young man can reasonably expect success1 unless he enters upon his work with his whole heart1 and pursues it with untiring assiduity4 ,of the necessity of improvement1 very few young men seem to have doubts4 ,but there is a difficulty which many feel1 which it will require no little effort to remove1 because it is one of long standing1 and wrought into all the arrangements of civilized society4 ,i allude to the prevailing impression that very little can be done to improve the mind beyond a certain age1 and the limit is often fixed at eighteen or twenty years4 ,we hear it1 indeed1 asserted1 that nothing can be done after thirty2 but the general belief is that most men cannot do much after twenty3 or at least that it will cost much harder effort and study4 ,now1 ,i would be the last to encourage any young person in wasting1 or even undervaluing his early years2 for youth is a golden period1 and every moment well spent will be to the future what good seed1 well planted in its season1 is to the husbandman4 ,the truth is1 that what we commonly call a course of education1 is only a course which prepares a young man to educate himself4 ,it is giving him the keys of knowledge4 ,but who will sit down contentedly and cease to make effort1 the moment he obtains the keys to the most valuable of treasures8 ,it is strange1 indeed1 that we should so long have talked of finishing an education1 when we have only just prepared ourselves to begin it4 ,if any young man at twenty1 twenty-five1 or thirty1 finds himself ignorant1 whether the fault is his own or that of others1 let him not for one single moment regard his age as presenting a serious obstacle to improvement4 ,should these remarks meet the eye of any such individual1 let me prevail with him1 when ,i urge him to make an effort4 ,not a momentary effort1 either2 let him take time for his experiment4 ,even ,rome was not built in a day2 and he who thinks to build up a well regulated and highly enlightened mind in a few weeks1 or even months1 has yet to learn the depths of his own ignorance4 ,it would be easy to cite a long list of men who commenced study late in life1 and yet finally became eminent2 and this1 too1 with no instructors but themselves and their books4 ,some have met with signal success1 who commenced after forty years of age4 ,indeed1 no reason can be shown1 why the mind may not improve as long1 at least1 as the body4 ,but all experience goes to prove that with those whose habits are judicious1 the physical frame does not attain perfection1 in every respect1 till thirty-five or forty4 ,it is indeed said that knowledge1 if it could be acquired thus late in life1 would be easily forgotten4 ,this is true1 if it be that kind of knowledge for which we have no immediate use4 ,but if it be of a practical character1 it will not fail to be remembered4 ,franklin was always learning1 till death4 ,and what he learned he seldom forgot1 because he had an immediate use for it4 ,i have said1 it is a great point to be convinced of the importance of knowledge4 ,i might add that it is a point of still greater consequence to feel our own ignorance4 ',to know ourselves diseased1 7morally7 is half our cure4' ,to know our own ignorance is the first step to knowledge2 and other things being alike1 our progress in knowledge will generally be in proportion to our sense of the want of it4 ,the strongest plea which indolence is apt to put in1 is1 that we have no time for study4 ,many a young man has had some sense of his own ignorance1 and a corresponding thirst for knowledge1 but alas6 the idea was entertained that he had no time to read--no time to study--no time to think4 ,and resting on this plea as satisfactory1 he has gone down to the grave the victim not only of indolence and ignorance1 but perhaps of vice2--vice1 too1 which he might have escaped with a little more general intelligence4 ,no greater mistake exists than that which so often haunts the human mind1 that we cannot find time for things2 things1 too1 which we have previously decided for ourselves that we ought to do4 ,alfred1 king of ,england1 though he performed more business than almost any of his subjects1 found time for study4 ,franklin1 in the midst of all his labors1 found time to dive into the depths of philosophy1 and explore an untrodden path of science4 ,frederick the ,great1 with an empire at his direction1 in the midst of war1 and on the eve of battles1 found time to revel in all the charms of philosophy1 and to feast himself on the rich viands of intellect4 ,bonaparte1 with ,europe at his disposal1 with kings at his ante-chamber begging for vacant thrones1 and at the head of thousands of men whose destinies were suspended on his arbitrary pleasure1 had time to converse with books4 ,caesar1 when he had curbed the spirits of the ,roman people1 and was thronged with visitors from the remotest kingdoms1 found time for intellectual cultivation4 ,the late ,dr4 ,rush1 and the still later ,dr4 ,dwight1 are eminent instances of what may be done for the cultivation of the mind1 in the midst of the greatest pressure of other occupation4 ,on this point1 it may be useful to mention the results of my own observation4 ,at no period of my life am ,i conscious of having made greater progress than ,i have sometimes done while laboring in the summer2 and almost incessantly too4 ,it is true1 ,i read but little2 yet that little was well understood and thoroughly digested4 ,almost all the knowledge ,i possess of ancient history was obtained in this way1 in one year4 ,of course1 a particular knowledge could not be expected1 under such circumstances2 but the general impressions and leading facts which were imbibed1 will be of very great value to me1 as ,i trust1 through life4 ,and ,i am acquainted with one or two similar instances4 ,it is true that mechanics and manufacturers1 as well as men of most other occupations1 find fewer leisure hours than most farmers4 ,the latter class of people are certainly more favorably situated than any other4 ,but it is also true that even the former1 almost without exception1 can command a small portion of their time every day1 for the purposes of mental improvement1 if they are determined on it4 ,few individuals can be found in the community1 who have not as much leisure as ,i had during the summer ,i have mentioned4 ,the great point is to have the necessary disposition to improve it2 and a second point1 of no small importance1 is to have at hand1 proper means of instruction4 ,of the latter ,i shall speak presently4 ,the reason why laboring men make such rapid progress in knowledge1 in proportion to the number of hours they devote to study1 appears to me obvious4 ,the mental appetite is keen1 and they devour with a relish4 ,what little they read and understand1 is thought over1 and perhaps conversed upon1 during the long interval2 and becomes truly the property of the reader4 ,whereas those who make study a business1 never possess a healthy appetite for knowledge2 they are always cloyed1 nothing is well digested2 and the result of their continued effort is either a superficial or a distorted view of a great many things1 without a thorough or practical understanding of any4 ,i do not propose1 in a work of this kind1 to recommend to young men what particular books on any subject they ought to study4 ,first1 because it is a matter of less importance than many others1 and ,i cannot find room to treat of every thing4 ,he who has the determination to make progress1 will do so1 either with or without books1 though these are certainly useful4 ,but an old piece of newspaper1 or a straggling leaf from some book1 or an inscription on a monument1 or the monument itself--and works of nature as well as of art1 will be books to him4 ,secondly1 because there is such an extensive range for selection4 ,but1 thirdly1 because it may often be left to the reader's own taste and discretion4 ,he will probably soon discover whether he is deriving solid or permanent benefit from his studies1 and govern himself accordingly4 ,or if he have a friend at hand1 who will be likely to make a judicious selection1 with a proper reference to his actual progress and wants1 he would do wrong not to avail himself of that friend's opinion4 ,i will now mention a few of the particular studies to which he who would educate himself for usefulness should direct his attention4 #a4 ,,geography4 ,as it is presumed that every one whom ,i address reads newspapers more or less1 ,i must be permitted to recommend that you read them with good maps of every quarter of the world before you1 and a geography and correct gazetteer at hand4 ,when a place is mentioned1 observe its situation on the map1 read an account of it in the gazetteer1 and a more particular description in the geography4 ,or if you choose to go through with the article1 and get some general notions of the subject1 and afterwards go back and read it a second time1 in the manner proposed1 to this ,i have no objection4 ,let me insist1 strongly1 on the importance of this method of reading4 ,it may seem slow at first2 but believe me1 you will be richly repaid in the end4 ,even in the lyceum1 where the subject seems to demand it1 and the nature of the case will admit1 it ought to be required of lecturers and disputants1 to explain every thing in passing1 either by reference to books themselves on the spot1 or by maps1 apparatus1 diagrams1 c2 with which1 it is plain1 that every lyceum ought to be furnished4 ,the more intelligent would lose nothing1 while the less so1 would gain much1 by this practice4 ,the expense of these things1 at the present time1 is so trifling1 that no person1 or association of persons1 whose object is scientific improvement1 should1 by any means1 dispense with them4 ,no science expands the mind of a young man more1 at the same time that it secures his cheerful attention1 than geography--,i mean if pursued in the foregoing manner4 ,its use is so obvious that the most stupid cannot fail to see it4 ,much is said1 ,i know1 of differences of taste on this1 as well as every other subject2 but ,i can hardly believe that any young person can be entirely without taste for geographical knowledge4 ,it is next to actual travels2 and who does not delight in seeing new places and new objects8 #b4 ,,history4 ,next in order as regards both interest and importance1 will be a knowledge of history1 with some attention at the same time to chronology4 ,here1 too1 the starting point will be the same as in the former case4 ,some circumstance or event mentioned at the lyceum1 or in the newspaper1 will excite curiosity1 and lead the way to inquiry4 ,i think it well1 however1 to have but one leading science in view at a time2 that is1 if geography be the object1 let history and almost every thing else be laid aside for that time1 in order to secure1 and hold fast the geographical information which is needed4 ,after a few weeks or months1 should he wish to pursue history1 let the student1 for some time confine himself chiefly1 perhaps exclusively1 to that branch4 ,the natural order of commencing and pursuing this branch without an instructor1 and ,i think in schools also1 is the following4 ,for example1 you take up a book1 or it may be a newspaper1 since these are swarming every where at the present time1 and read that a person has just deceased1 who was at ,yorktown1 in ,virginia1 during the whole siege1 in the ,american revolution4 ,i am supposing here that you have already learned where ,yorktown is2 for geography1 to some extent at least1 should precede history2 but if not1 ,i would let it pass for the moment1 since we cannot do every thing at once1 and proceed to inquire about the siege1 and revolution4 ,if you have any books whatever1 on history1 within your reach1 do not give up the pursuit till you have attained a measure of success4 ,find out1 when the siege in question happened1 by whom1 and by how many thousand troops it was carried on2 and who and how many the besieged were4 ,he who follows out this plan1 will soon find his mind reaching beyond the mere events alluded to in the newspaper1 both forward and backward4 ,as in the example already mentioned1 for ,i cannot think of a better2--,what were the consequences of this siege8--,did it help to bring about peace1 and how soon8--,and did the two nations ever engage in war afterward8--,if so1 how soon1 and with what results8 ,what became of the ,french troops and of the good ,la ,fayette8 ,this would lead to the study of ,french history for the last forty years4 ,on the other hand1 ,where had ,washington and ,la ,fayette and ,cornwallis been employed1 previous to the siege of ,yorktown8 ,what battles had they fought1 and with what success8 ,what led to the quarrel between ,great ,britain and the ,united ,states8 c4 ,thus we should naturally go backward1 step by step1 until we should get much of modern history clustered round this single event of the siege of ,yorktown4 ,the same course should be pursued in the case of any other event1 either ancient or modern4 ,if newspapers are not thus read1 they dissipate the mind1 and probably do about as much harm as good4 ,it is deemed disgraceful--and ought to be--for any young man at this day to be ignorant of the geography and history of the country in which he lives4 ,and yet it is no uncommon occurrence4 ,however it argues much against the excellence of our systems of education1 that almost every child should be carried apparently through a wide range of science1 and over the whole material universe1 and yet know nothing1 or next to nothing1 practically1 of his own country4 #c4 ,,arithmetic4 ,no young man is excusable who is destitute of a knowledge of ,arithmetic4 ,it is probable1 however1 that no individual will read this book1 who has not some knowledge of the fundamental branches2 numeration1 addition1 subtraction1 multiplication1 and division4 ,but with these1 every person has the key to a thorough acquaintance with the whole subject1 so far as his situation in life requires4 ,to avail himself of these keys to mathematical knowledge1 he must pursue a course not unlike that which ,i have recommended in relation to geography and history4 ,he must seize on every circumstance which occurs in his reading1 where reckoning is required1 and if possible1 stop at once and compute it4 ,or if not1 let the place be marked1 and at the first leisure moment1 let him turn to it1 and make the estimates4 ,suppose he reads of a shipwreck4 ,the crew is said to consist of thirty men besides the captain and mate1 with three hundred and thirteen passengers1 and a company of sixty grenadiers4 ,the captain and mate1 and ten of the crew escaped in the long boat4 ,the rest were drowned1 except twelve of the grenadiers1 who clung to a floating fragment of the wreck till they were taken off by another vessel4 ,now is there a single person in existence1 who would read such an account1 without being anxious to know how many persons in the whole were lost8 ,yet nine readers in ten would not know2 and why8 ,simply because they will not stop to use what little addition and subtraction they possess4 ,i do not say that1 in reading to a company1 who did not expect it1 a young man would be required to stop and make the computation2 but ,i do say that in all ordinary cases1 no person is excusable who omits it1 for it is a flagrant wrong to his own mind4 ,long practice1 it is true1 will render it unnecessary for an individual to pause1 in order to estimate a sum like that abovementioned4 ,many1 indeed most persons who are familiar with figures1 might compute these numbers while reading1 and without the slightest pause2 but it certainly requires some practice4 ,and the most important use of arithmetical studies 7except as a discipline to the mind7 is to enable us to reckon without slates and pencils4 ,he has but a miserable knowledge of arithmetic1 who is no arithmetician without a pen or pencil in his hand4 ,these are but the ladders upon which he should ascend to the science1 and not the science itself4 #d4 ,,chemistry ,,and ,,other ,,natural ,,sciences4 ,if ,i were to name one branch1 as more important to a young man than any other1--next to the merest elements of reading and writing--it would be chemistry4 ,not a mere smattering of it1 however2 for this usually does about as much harm as good4 ,but a thorough knowledge of a few of the simple elements of bodies1 and some of their most interesting combinations1 such as are witnessed every day of our lives1 but which1 for want of a little knowledge of chemistry1 are never understood1 would do more to interest a young man in the business in which he may be employed1 than almost any thing ,i could name4 ,for there is hardly a single trade or occupation whatever1 that does not embrace a greater or less number of chemical processes4 ,chemistry is of very high importance even to the gardener and the farmer4 ,there are several other branches which come under the general head of ,,natural ,,science1 which ,i recommend to your attention4 ,such are ,,botany1 or a knowledge of plants2 ,,natural ,,history1 or a knowledge of animals2 and ,,geology1 or a general knowledge of the rocks and stones of which the earth on which we live is composed4 ,i do not think these are equally important with the knowledge of chemistry1 but they are highly interesting1 and by no means without their value4 #e4 ,,grammar ,,and ,,composition4 ,the foundation of a knowledge of ,grammar is1 in my view1 ,composition2 and composition1 whether learned early or late1 is best acquired by letter writing4 ,this habit1 early commenced1 and judiciously but perseveringly followed1 will in time1 ensure the art not only of composing well1 but also grammatically4 ,i know this position is sometimes doubted1 but the testimony is so strong1 that the point seems to me fully established4 ,it is related in ,ramsay's ,life of ,washington1 that many individuals1 who1 before the war of the ,american ,revolution1 could scarcely write their names1 became1 in the progress of that war1 able to compose letters which were not only intelligible and correct1 but which would have done credit to a profound grammarian4 ,the reason of this undoubtedly was1 that they were thrown into situations where they were obliged to write much and often1 and in such a manner as to be clearly understood4 ,perhaps the misinterpretation of a single doubtful word or sentence might have been the ruin of an army1 or even of the cause4 ,thus they had a motive to write accurately2 and long practice1 with a powerful motive before them1 rendered them successful4 ,nor is it necessary that motives so powerful should always exist1 in order to produce this result2--it is sufficient that there be a motive to write well1 and to persevere in writing well4 ,i have known several pedlars and traders1 whose business led to the same consequences4 #f4 ,,letter ,,writing4 ,but what ,i have seen most successful1 is1 the practice of common letter writing1 from friend to friend1 on any topic which happened to occur1 either ordinary1 or extraordinary2 with the mutual understanding and desire that each should criticise freely on the other's composition4 ,i have known more than one individual1 who became a good writer from this practice1 with little aid from grammatical rules2 and without any direct instruction at all4 ,these remarks are not made to lessen the value which any young man may have put upon the studies of grammar and composition1 as pursued in our schools2 but rather to show that a course at school is not absolutely indispensable2 and to encourage those who are never likely to enjoy the latter means1 to make use of means not yet out of their reach1 and which have often been successful4 ,but lest there should be an apparent contradiction in some of my remarks1 it will be necessary to say that ,i think the practice of familiar letter writing from our earliest years1 even at school1 should1 in every instance1 have a much more prominent place than is usually assigned it2 and the study of books on ,grammar and ,composition one much less prominent4 #g4 ,,voyages1 ,,travels1 ,,and ,,biography4 ,for mere ,,reading1 well selected ,voyages and ,travels are among the best works for young men2 particularly for those who find little taste for reading1 and wish to enkindle it2 and whose geographical knowledge is deficient4 ,well written ,,biography is next in importance1 and usually so in interest2 and so improving to the character is this species of composition1 that it really ought to be regarded as a separate branch of education1 as much as history or geography2 and treated accordingly4 ,in the selection of both these species of writing the aid of an intelligent1 experienced and judicious friend would be of very great service2 and happy is he who has such a treasure at hand4 #h4 ,,novels4 ,as to ,,novels it is difficult to say what advice ought to be given4 ,at first view they seem unnecessary1 wholly so2 and from this single consideration4 ,they interest and improve just in proportion as the fiction they contain is made to resemble reality2 and hence it might be inferred1 and naturally enough1 too1 that reality would in all cases be preferable to that which imitates it4 ,but to this it may be replied1 that we have few books of narrative and biography1 which are written with so much spirit as some works of fiction2 and that until those departments are better filled1 fiction1 properly selected1 should be admissible4 ,but if fiction be allowable at all1 it is only under the guidance of age and experience2--and here there is even a more pressing need of a friend than in the cases already mentioned4 ,on the whole1 it is believed to be better for young men who have little leisure for reading1 and who wish to make the most they can of that little1 to abandon novels wholly4 ,if they begin to read them1 it is difficult to tell to what an excess they may go2 but if they never read one in their whole lives1 they will sustain no great loss4 ,would not the careful study of a single chapter of ,watts's ,improvement of the ,mind1 be of more real practical value than the perusal of all that the best novel writers1--,walter ,scott not excepted1--have ever written8 #i4 ,,of ,,newspapers4 ,among other means both of mental and moral improvement at the present day1 are periodical publications4 ,the multiplicity and cheapness of these sources of knowledge renders them accessible to all classes of the community4 ,and though their influence were to be as evil as the frogs of ,egypt we could not escape it4 ,doubtless they produce much evil1 though their tendency on the whole is believed to be salutary4 ,but wisdom is necessary1 in order to derive the greatest amount of benefit from them2 and here1 perhaps1 more than any where else1 do the young need the counsels of experience4 ,i am not about to direct what particular newspapers and magazines they ought to read2 this is a point which their friends and relatives must assist them in determining4 ,my purpose is simply to point to a few principles which should guide both the young and those who advise them1 in making the selection4 #a4 ,in the first place1 do not seek for your guide a paper which is just commencing its existence1 unless you have reason to think the character of its conductors is such as you approve4 #b4 ,avoid1 unless your particular occupation requires it1 a business paper4 ,otherwise your head will become so full of 'arrivals' and 'departures1' and 'prices current1' and 'news1' that you will hardly find room for any thing else4 #c4 ,do not take a paper which dwells on nothing but the details of human depravity4 ,it will indeed1 for a time1 call forth a sensibility to the woes of mankind2 but the final result will probably be a stupidity and insensibility to human suffering which you would give much to remove4 #d4 ,avoid those papers which1 awed by the cry for short and light articles1 have rendered their pages mere columns of insulated facts or useless scraps1 or what is still worse1 of unnatural and sickening love stories4 ,lastly1 do not take a paper which sneers at religion4 ,it is quite enough that many periodicals do1 in effect1 take a course which tends to irreligion1 by leaving this great subject wholly out of sight4 ,but when they openly sneer at and ridicule the most sacred things1 leave them at once4 ',evil communications corrupt' the best 'manners2' and though the sentiment may not at once be received1 ,i can assure my youthful readers that there are no publications which have more direct effect upon their lives1 than these unpretending companions2 and perhaps the very reason is because we least suspect them4 ,against receiving deep or permanent impressions from the ,bible1 the sermon1 or the book of any kind1 we are on our watch1 but who thinks of having his principles contaminated1 or affected much in any way1 merely by the newspaper8 ,yet ,i am greatly mistaken1 if these very monitors do not have more influence1 after all1 in forming the minds1 the manners1 and the morals 7shall ,i add1 the religious character1 even87 of the rising generation1 than all the other means which ,i have mentioned1 put together4 ,how important1 in this view1 it becomes1 that your newspaper reading should be well selected4 ,let me again repeat the request1 that in selecting those papers which sustain an appropriate character1 you will seek the advice of those whom you deem most able and judicious2 and so far as you think them disinterested1 and worthy of your confidence1 endeavor to follow it4 ,politics4 ,as to the study of politics1 in the usual sense of the term1 it certainly cannot be advisable4 ,nothing appears to me more disgusting than to see young men rushing into the field of political warfare1 and taking sides as fiercely as if they laid claim to infallibility1 where their fathers and grandfathers modestly confess ignorance4 ,at the same time1 in a government like ours1 where the highest offices are in the gift of the people1 and within the reach of every young man of tolerable capacity1 it would be disgraceful not to study the history and constitution of our own country1 and closely to watch all legislative movements1 at least in the councils of the nation4 ,the time is not far distant1 it is hoped1 when these will be made every day subjects in our elementary schools2 and when no youth will arrive at manhood1 as thousands1 and1 ,i was going to say1 millions now do1 without understanding clearly a single article in the ,constitution of the ,united ,states1 or even in that of the ,state in which he resides3 nor even how his native state is represented in ,congress4 ,again1 most young men will probably1 sooner or later1 vote for rulers in the town1 state1 and nation to which they belong4 ,should they vote at random8 ,or what is little better1 take their opinions upon trust8 ,or shall they examine for themselves2 and go to the polls with their eyes open8 ,at a day like the present1 nothing appears to me more obvious than that young men ought to understand what they are doing when they concern themselves with public men or public measures4 #aj4 ,,keeping ,a ,,journal4 ,i have already spoken of the importance of letter writing4 ,the keeping of a journal is scarcely less so1 provided it be done in a proper manner4 ,i have seen journals1 however1 which1 aside from the fact that they improve the handwriting1 and encourage method1 could have been of very little use4 ,a young agriculturist kept a journal for many years1 of which the following is a specimen4 #ahac4 ,july #b4 ,began our haying4 ,mowed in the forenoon1 and raked in the afternoon4 ,weather good4 #c4 ,continued haying4 ,mowed4 ,got in one load4 ,cloudy4 #d4 ,independence4 ,went1 in the afternoon1 to ----4 #e4 ,stormy4 ,did nothing out of doors4 ,this method of keeping a journal was continued for many years2 and only discontinued1 because it was found useless4 ,a better and more useful sort of journal for these four days1 would have read something like the following4 #ahac4 ,july #b4 ,our haying season commenced4 ,how fond ,i am of this employment6 ,how useful an article hay is1 too1 especially in this climate1 during our long and cold winters6 ,we have fine weather to begin with1 and ,i hope it will continue4 ,i think a very great improvement might be made in our rakes4 ,why need they be so heavy for light raking8 ,we could take up the heavier ones when it became necessary4 ,july #c4 ,to-day ,i have worked rather too hard in order to get in some of our hay1 for there is a prospect of rain4 ,i am not quite sure1 however1 but ,i hurt myself more by drinking too much cold water than by over-working4 ,will try to do better to-morrow4 #d4 ,have heard a few cannon fired1 and a spouting oration delivered1 and seen a few toasts drank2 and what does it all amount to8 ,is this way of keeping the day of independence really useful8 ,i doubt it4 ,who knows but the value of the wine which has been drank1 expended among the poor1 would have done more towards real independence1 than all this parade8 #e4 ,rainy4 ,would it not have been better had ,i staid at home yesterday1 while the weather was fair1 and gone on with haying8 ,several acres of father's grass want cutting very much4 ,i am more and more sick of going to independence4 ,if ,i live till another year1 ,i hope ,i shall learn to 'make hay while the sun shines4' ,i selected a common agricultural employment to illustrate my subject1 first1 because ,i suppose a considerable proportion of my readers are farmers1 and secondly1 because it is an employment which is generally supposed to furnish little or nothing worth recording4 ,the latter1 however1 is a great mistake4 ,besides writing down the real incidents that occur1 many of which would be interesting1 and some of them highly important facts1 the thoughts1 which the circumstances and incidents of an agricultural life are calculated to elicit1 are innumerable4 ,and these should always be put down4 ,they are to the mere detail of facts and occurrences1 what leaves and fruit are to the dry trunk and naked limbs of a tree4 ,the above specimen is very dry indeed1 being intended only as a hint4 ,pages1 instead of a few lines1 might sometimes be written1 when our leisure permitted1 and thoughts flowed freely4 ,one useful method of improving the mind1 and preparing ourselves for usefulness1 would be1 to carry a small blank book and pencil in our pockets1 and when any interesting fact occurred1 embrace the first spare moment to put it down1 say on the right hand page2 and either then1 or at some future time1 place on the left hand page1 our own reflections about it4 ,some of the most useful men in the world owe much of their usefulness to a plan like this1 promptly and perseveringly followed4 ,quotations from books or papers might also be preserved in the same manner4#aj ,perhaps it may be thought1 at first1 that this advice is not in keeping with the caution formerly given1 not to read as we travel about2 but if you reflect1 you will find it otherwise4 ,reading as we travel1 and at meals1 and the recording of facts and thoughts which occur1 are things as different as can well be conceived4 ,the latter creates and encourages a demand for close observation1 the former discourages and even suppresses it4 #aa4 ,,preservation ,,of ,,books ,,and ,,papers4 ,let books be covered as soon as bought4 ,never use them without clean hands4 ,they show the dirt with extreme readiness1 and it is not easily removed4 ,i have seen books in which might be traced the careless thumbs and fingers of the last reader1 for half a dozen or a dozen pages in succession4 ,i have known a gentleman--quite a literary man1 too--who1 having been careful of his books in his earlier years1 and having recently found them occasionally soiled1 charged the fault on those who occasionally visited his library4 ,at last he discovered that the coal dust 7for he kept a coal fire7 settled on his hands1 and was rubbed off upon his book leaves by the slight friction of his fingers upon the leaves in reading4 ,never wet your finger or thumb in order to turn over leaves4 ,many respectable people are addicted to this habit1 but it is a vulgar one4 ,besides1 it is entirely useless4 ,the same remarks might be applied to the habit of suffering the corners of the leaves to turn up1 in 'dog's ears4' ,keep every leaf smooth1 if you can4 ,never hold a book very near the fire1 nor leave it in the hot sun4 ,it injures its cover materially1 and not a few books are in one or both of these ways entirely ruined4 ,it is a bad practice to spread out a book with the back upwards4 ,it loosens the leaves1 and also exposes it in other respects4 ,you will rarely find a place to lay it down which is entirely clean1 and the least dust on the leaves1 is readily observed4 ,the plan of turning down a leaf to enable us to remember the place1 ,i never liked4 ,it indulges the memory in laziness4 ,for myself1 if ,i take much interest in a book1 ,i can remember where ,i left off and turn at once to the place without a mark4 ,if a mark must be used at all1 however1 a slip of paper1 or a piece of tape or ribbon is the best4 ,when you have done using a book for the time1 have a place for it1 and put it in its place4 ,how much time and patience might be saved if this rule were universally followed6 ,many find it the easiest thing in the world to have a place for every book in their library1 and to keep it in its place4 ,they can put their hands upon it in the dark1 almost as well as in the light4 ,never allow yourselves to use books for any other purpose but reading4 ,i have seen people recline after dinner and at other times1 with books under their heads for a pillow4 ,others will use them to cover a tumbler1 bowl1 or pitcher4 ,others again will raise the window1 and set them under the sash to support it2 and next1 perhaps1 the book is wet by a sudden shower of rain1 or knocked out of the window1 soiled or otherwise injured1 or lost4 ,i have seen people use large books1 such as the family-bible1 or encyclopedia1 to raise a seat1 especially for a child at table4 #aj ,some persons always read with a pen or pencil in hand1 and when a thought occurs1 note it in a little book1 kept for the purpose4 ,,chapter ,v4 ,social and ,moral ,improvement4 ,,section ,i4 ,of ,female ,society1 in general4 ,no young man is fully aware how much he is indebted to female influence in forming his character4 ,happy for him if his mother and sisters were his principal companions in infancy4 ,i do not mean to exclude the society of the father1 of course2 but the father's avocations usually call him away from home1 or at least from the immediate presence of his children1 for a very considerable proportion of his time4 ,it would be easy to show1 without the possibility of mistake1 that it is those young men who are shut out either by accident or design1 from female society1 that most despise it4 ,and on this account1 ,i cannot but regret the supposed necessity which prevails of having separate schools for the two sexes2 unless it were professional ones--,i mean for the study of law1 medicine1 c4 ,there is yet too much practical ,mohammedanism and ,paganism in our manner of educating the young4 ,if we examine the character and conduct of woman as it now is1 and as history shows it to have been in other periods of the world1 we shall see that much of the good and evil which has fallen upon mankind has been through her influence4 ,we may see that man has often been influenced directly by the soft warning words1 or the still more powerful weapons--tears--of woman1 to do that to which whole legions of soldiers never could have driven him4 ,now the same influence which is exerted by mothers and wives is also exerted1 in a smaller degree1 by sisters2 and indeed by the female sex generally4 ,when1 therefore1 ,i find a young man professing a disregard for their society1 or frequenting only the worst part of it1 ,i always expect to find in him a soul which would not hesitate long1 in the day of temptation1 to stoop to vicious if not base actions4 ,who would despise the fountain at which he is refreshed daily8 ,above all1 who would willingly contaminate it8 ,but how much better than this is it to show by our language1 as well as deeds1 that we hold this portion of the world in disdain2 and only meet with them1 if we meet them at all1 to comply with custom1 or for purposes still more unworthy2 instead of seeking their society as a means of elevating and ennobling the character8 ,when1 therefore1 a young man begins to affect the wit1 and to utter sarcasms against the female character1 it may be set down as a mark1 either of a weak head1 or a base heart2 for it cannot be good sense or gratitude1 or justice1 or honorable feeling of any kind4 ,there are indeed nations1 it is said1 where a boy1 as soon as he puts off the dress of a child1 beats his mother1 to show his manhood4 ,these people live in the interior of ,africa1 and there let them remain4 ,let us be careful that we do not degrade the sex1 in the same manner1 by disrespectful language1 or actions1 or thoughts4 ,we should 'think no evil1' on this subject2 for let it never be forgotten1 that our own happiness and elevation of character must ever be in exact proportion to that of females4 ,degrade them1 and we degrade ourselves2 neglect to raise their moral and intellectual condition as much as possible1 and you neglect the readiest and most certain means of promoting1 in the end1 your own comfort and happiness4 ,if any of your elder associates defame the sex1 you can hardly be mistaken when you suspect them of having vitiated their taste for what is excellent in human character by improper intimacies1 or still more abominable vices4 ,the man who says he has never found a virtuous female character1 you may rely upon it1 cannot himself be virtuous4 ,in civilized society much of our time must necessarily be spent among females4 ,these associations will have influence upon us4 ,either they are perpetually improving our character1 or1 on the other hand1 by increasing our disregard or disgust1 debasing it4 ,is it not wisdom1 then1 to make what we can of the advantages and opportunities which their society affords us8 ,the very presence of a respectable female will often restrain those from evil whose hearts are full of it4 ,it is not easy to talk or to look obscenely1 or even to behave with rudeness and ill manners under such restraint4 ,who has not seen the jarring and discordant tones of a company of rude men and boys hushed at once by the sudden arrival of a lady of dignified manners and appearance8 ,the frequent1 the habitual society of one whom a youth respects1 must have a happy tendency to make him love honorable conduct2 and restrain his less honorable feelings4 ,frequent restraint tends to give the actual mastery2 therefore every approach towards this must be of great value4 ,there is a delicacy1 too1 in female society1 which serves well to check the boisterous1 to tame the brutal1 and to embolden the timid4 ,whatever be the innate character of a youth1 it may be polished1 and exalted1 by their approbation4 ,he must be unusually hardened that can come from some shameful excess1 or in a state of inebriety1 into the company of the ladies4 ,sometimes a diffident youth has been taken under the protection1 if it may be so called1 of a considerate and respectable woman4 ,a woman of proper dignity of manners and character1 especially with a few years' advantage1 can do this without the least injury to herself1 and without stepping a hair's breadth beyond the bounds which should surround her sex4 ,happy is the young man who enjoys a fostering care so important2 he may learn the value of the sex2 learn to discriminate among them1 to esteem many of them1 and prize their approbation2 and in time1 deserve it4 ,it is obvious that the favor of silly1 flirting girls1 7and there are some such7 is not what ,i am here recommending4 ,where the character of such society is pure1 where good sense1 cultivation1 intellect1 modesty1 and superior age1 distinguish the parties1 it is no small honor to a young man to enjoy it4 ,should he be conscious that epithets of a different and of a contrary quality belong to them1 it is no honor to him to be their favorite4 ,he must be like them1 in some degree1 or they would not approve him4 ,,section ,,ii4 ,advice and ,friendship of ,mothers4 ,when you seek female society for the sake of improvement1 it is proper you should begin where nature begun with you4 ,you have already been encouraged to respect your mother2 ,i go a step farther2 and say1 ,make her your friend4 ,unless your own misconduct has already been very great1 she will not be so far estranged from you1 as not to rejoice at the opportunity of bestowing that attention to you which the warmest wishes for your welfare would dictate4 ,if your errors have1 on the contrary1 created a wide distance between you1 endeavor to restore the connection as soon as possible4 ,i do not undervalue a father's counsel and guidance2 yet however excellent his judgment may be1 your mother's opinion is not only a help to your own2 but as a woman's1 it has its peculiar character1 and may have its appropriate value4 ,women sometimes see at a glance1 what a man must go round through a train of argument to discover4 ,their tact is delicate1 and therefore quicker in operation4 ,sometimes1 it is true1 their judgment will not only be prompt1 but premature4 ,your own judgment must assist you here4 ,do not1 however1 proudly despise your mother's2--but examine it4 ,it will generally well repay the trouble2 and the habit of consulting her will increase habits of consideration1 and self command2 and promote propriety of conduct4 ,if a mother be a woman of sense1 why should you not profit by her long exercised intelligence8 ,nay1 should she even be deficient in cultivation1 or in native talent1 yet her experience is something1 and her love for you will1 in part1 make up for such deficiency4 ,it cannot be worthiness to despise1 or wisdom to neglect your mother's opinion4 ,,section ,,iii4 ,society of ,sisters4 ,have you a sister8--,have you several of them8 ,then you are favorably situated2 especially if one of them is older than yourself4 ,she has done playing with dolls1 and you with bats and balls4 ,she is more womanly2 her carriage becomes dignified4 ,do not oblige her1 by your boyish behavior1 to keep you at a distance4 ,try to deserve the character of her friend4 ,she will sometimes look to you for little services1 which require strength and agility2 let her look up to you for judgment1 steadiness1 and counsel too4 ,you may be mutually beneficial4 ,your affection1 and your intertwining interest in each other's welfare1 will hereby be much increased4 ,a sister usually present1 is that sort of second conscience1 which1 like the fairy ring1 in an old story1 pinches the wearer whenever he is doing any thing amiss4 ,without occasioning so much awe as a mother1 or so much reserve as a stranger1 her sex1 her affection1 and the familiarity between you will form a compound of no small value in itself1 and of no small influence1 if you duly regard it1 upon your growing character4 ,never for one moment suppose that a good joke at which a sister blushes1 or turns pale1 or even looks anxious4 ,if you should not at first perceive what there is in it which is amiss1 it will be well worth your while to examine all over again4 ,perhaps a single glance of her eye will explain your inconsiderateness2 and as you value consistency and propriety of conduct1 let it put you on your guard4 ,there is a sort of attention due to the sex which is best attained by practising at home4 ,your mother may sometimes require this attention1 your sisters still oftener4 ,do not require calling1 or teasing1 or even persuading to go abroad with them when their safety1 their comfort1 or their respectability require it4 ,it is their due2 and stupid or unkind is he who does not esteem it so4 ,in performing this service1 you are only paying a respect to yourself4 ,your sister could1 indeed1 come home alone1 but it would be a sad reflection on you were she obliged to do so4 ,accustom yourself1 then1 to wait upon her2 it will teach you to wait upon others by and by2 and in the meantime1 it will give a graceful polish to your character4 ,it will be well for you1 if your sisters have young friends whose acquaintance with them may bring you sometimes into their society4 ,the familiarity allowable with your sisters1 though it may well prepare you to show suitable attention to other ladies1 yet has its disadvantages4 ,you need sometimes to have those present who may keep you still more upon your guard2 and render your manners and attention to them still more respectful4 ,,section ,,iv4 ,general ,remarks and ,advice4 ,never seek1 then1 to avoid respectable female society4 ,total privation has its dangers1 as well as too great intimacy4 ,one of the bad results of such a privation1 is1 that you run the risk of becoming attached to unworthy objects because they first fall in your way4 ,human nature is ever in danger of perversion4 ,those passions which ,god has given you for the wisest and noblest purposes may goad you onward1 and1 if they do not prove the occasion of your destruction in one way1 they may in another4 ,if you should be preserved in solitude1 you will not be quite safe abroad4 ,having but a very imperfect conception of the different shades of character among the sex1 you will be ready to suppose all are excellent who appear fair and all good who appear gentle4 ,i have alluded to the dangers of too great intimacy4 ,nothing here advanced is intended to make you a mere trifler1 or to sink the dignity of your own sex4 ,although you are to respect females because of their sex1 yet there are some who bestow upon them a species of attention extremely injurious to themselves1 and unpleasant and degrading to all sensible ladies4 ,there is still another evil sometimes resulting from too great intimacy4 ,it is that you lead the other party to mistake your object4 ,this mistake is easily made4 ,it is not necessary1 to this end1 that you should make any professions of attachment1 in word or deed4 ,looks1 nay even something less than this1 though it may be difficult to define it1 may indicate that sort of preference for the society of a lady1 that has sometimes awakened an attachment in her which you never suspected or intended4 ,or what is a far less evil1 since it falls chiefly on yourself1 it may lead her and others to ridicule you for what they suppose to be the result1 on your part1 of intention4 ,let me caution you1 then1 if you would obey the golden rule of doing to others as you would wish others should do to you1 in the same circumstances1 and if you value1 besides this1 your own peace1 to beware of injuring those whom you highly esteem1 by leading them by words1 looks1 or actions1 to that misapprehension of your meaning which may be the means of planting thorns in their bosoms1 if not in your own4 ,there is another error to which ,i wish to call your attention1 in this place1 although it might more properly be placed under the head1 ,seduction4 ,i allude to the error of too great familiarity with others1 after your heart is already pledged to a particular favorite4 ,here1 more1 if possible1 than in the former case1 do you need to set a guard over all your ways1 words1 and actions2 and to resolve1 in the strength1 and with the aid of ,divine grace1 that you will never deviate from that rule of conduct toward others1--which ,divine ,goodness has given1 as the grand text to the book of human duty4 ,the general idea presented in the foregoing sections1 of what a woman ought to be1 is sufficient to guide you1 with a little care in the application4 ,such as are forward1 soon become tedious4 ,their character is what no man of taste will bear4 ,some are even anglers1 aiming to catch gudgeons by every look2 placing themselves in attitudes to allure the vagrant eye4 ,against such it is quite unnecessary that ,i should warn you2 they usually give you sufficient notice themselves4 ,the trifler can scarcely amuse you for an evening4 ,the company of a lady who has nothing to say but what is commonplace1 whose inactive mind never for once stumbles upon an idea of its own1 must be dull1 as a matter of course4 ,you can learn nothing from her1 unless it be the folly of a vacant mind4 ,come away1 lest you catch the same disorder4 ,the artful and manoeuvring1 on the contrary1 will1 at a glance1 penetrate your inmost mind1 and become any thing which they perceive will be agreeable to you4 ,should your lot be cast where you can enjoy the society of a few intelligent1 agreeable1 and respectable females1 remember to prize the acquisition4 ,if you do not derive immense advantage from it1 the fault must be your own4 ,if1 in addition to the foregoing qualifications1 these female friends happen to have had a judicious and useful1 rather than a merely polite education1 your advantages are doubly valuable4 ,the genial influence of such companions must unavoidably be on the side of goodness and propriety4 ,loveliness of mind will impart that agreeableness of person which recommends to the heart every sentiment1 gives weight to every argument1 justifies every opinion1 and soothes to recollection and recovery those who1 were they reproved by any other voice1 might have risen to resistance1 or sunk into despair4 ,the only necessary caution in the case is1 ',beware of idolatry4' ,keep yourself clear from fascination1 and call in the aid of your severest judgment to keep your mind true to yourself1 and to principle4 ,,section ,v4 ,lyceums and other ,social ,meetings4 ,the course of my remarks has given occasion1 in several instances1 to speak of the importance of lyceums as a means of mental and social improvement4 ,it will not be necessary therefore1 in this place1 to dwell1 at length1 on their importance4 ,my principal object will be to call your attention to the subject in general1 and urge it upon your consideration4 ,i hope no young person who reads these pages1 will neglect to avail himself of the advantages which a good lyceum affords2 or if there are none of that character within his reach1 let him make unremitting efforts till one exists4 ,although these institutions are yet in their infancy1 and could hardly have been expected to accomplish more within the same period than they have1 it is hoped they will not hereafter confine their inquiries so exclusively to matters of mere intellect1 as has often been done4 ,there are other subjects nearer home1 if ,i may so say1 than these4 ,how strangely do mankind1 generally1 stretch their thoughts and inquiries abroad to the concerns of other individuals1 states and nations1 and forget themselves1 and the objects and beings near by them1 and their mutual relations1 connections1 and dependencies6 ,lyceums1 when they shall have obtained a firmer footing among us1 may become a most valuable means of enlightening the mass of the community1 in regard to the structure and laws of the human body1 and its relation to surrounding objects2 of discussing the philosophy of dress1 and its different materials for different seasons2 of food1 and drink1 and sleep and exercise2 of dwellings and other buildings2 of amusements and employments2--in short1 of the ten thousand little things1 as many call them1 which go to make up human life1 with its enjoyments or miseries4 ,these things have been surprisingly overlooked by most men1 for the sake of attending to others1 whose bearing on human happiness1 if not often questionable1 is at least more remote4 ,in some of our larger cities there are respectable courses of useful lectures established during the months of winter1 and sometimes throughout the year4 ,added to this are reading-rooms1 and various sorts of libraries1 which are accessible for a small sum1 and sometimes for almost nothing4 ,there have been three valuable courses of ,franklin ,lectures delivered in ,boston1 during the three last winters1 of twenty lectures each1 for only fifty cents a course4 ,in most large towns1 benevolent and spirited individuals might establish something of the same kind1 at least every winter4 ,,section ,,vi4 ,moral ,instruction4 ,it was not my intention1 at first1 to say a single word1 directly1 on the subject of religion1 but ,i should leave this chapter very incomplete indeed1 as well as do violence to my own feelings1 should ,i say nothing at all of ,bible classes1 and other means of religious instruction1 with which the age1 and especially this part of the country abounds1 not only on ,sundays1 but during the long evenings of leisure which1 for a part of the year1 many young men enjoy4 ,viewed merely as a means of improving the mind1 and acquiring much authentic historical information to be found nowhere else1 the study of the ,bible is a most valuable exercise1 and ought to be encouraged4 ,to adults who labor1 a walk to church1 and prompt attention to the ,bible lesson1 is happily adapted to the health of the body1 no less than to intellectual improvement2 and whatever objections might be urged against subjecting infants and young children who attend other schools during the week1 to the present routine of ,sabbath instruction1 ,i am quite sure that the class of young persons for whom ,i am writing1 would derive the most lasting benefit from studying the ,bible4 ,i have made these remarks on the presumption that they were to derive no moral improvement from ,bible instruction4 ,however1 ,i see not how these schools can be long attended by ingenuous minds without inspiring a respect1 at the least1 for that book which is superior to all other books1 and for that religion which it inculcates2 which is above all sect1 and beyond all price4 ,,section ,,vii4 ,of ,female ,society in reference to ,marriage4 ,it is now time to consider the subject of female society in reference to matrimony4 ,i shall find it necessary1 however1 to make a division of my subject1 reserving a more complete view of female qualifications for a succeeding chapter4 ,whatever advice may be given to the contrary by friends or foes1 it is my opinion that you ought to keep matrimony steadily in view4 ,for this end1 were it for no other1 you ought to mingle much in society4 ,never consider yourself complete without this other half of yourself4 ,it is too much the fashion among young men at the present day to make up their minds to dispense with marriage2--an unnatural1 and therefore an unwise plan4 ,much of our character1 and most of our comfort and happiness depend upon it4 ,many have found this out too late2 that is1 after age and fixed habits had partly disqualified them for this important duty4 ,all that has been hitherto said of female influence bears upon this point4 ,according to the character of the person you select1 in a considerable degree1 will be your own4 ,should a mere face fascinate you to a doll1 you will not need much mental energy to please her2 and the necessity of exertion on this account being small1 your own self will sink1 or at least not rise1 as it otherwise might do4 ,but were ,i personally acquainted with you1 and should ,i perceive an honorable attachment taking possession of your heart1 ,i should regard it as a happy circumstance4 ,life then has an object4 ,the only thing to be observed is that it be managed with prudence1 honor1 and good sense4 ,the case of ,john ,newton is precisely in point4 ,in very early life this man formed a strong attachment to a lady1 under circumstances which did not permit him to make it known2 which was probably well for both parties4 ,it did not diminish her happiness1 so long as she remained in ignorance on the subject2 and in scenes of sorrow1 suffering1 and temptation1 the hope of one day obtaining her soothed him1 and kept him from performing many dishonorable actions4 ',the bare possibility1' he says1 'of seeing her again1 was the only obvious means of restraining me from the most horrid designs1 against myself and others4' ,the wish to marry1 if prudently indulged1 will lead to honest and persevering exertions to obtain a reasonable income--one which will be satisfactory to the object of your hopes1 as well as to her friends4 ,he who is determined on living a single life1 very naturally contracts his endeavors to his own narrow personal wants1 or else squanders freely1 in the belief that he can always procure enough to support himself4 ,indeed it cannot have escaped even the careless observer that in proportion as an individual relinquishes the idea of matrimony1 just in the same proportion do his mind and feelings contract4 ,on the contrary1 that hope which aims at a beloved partner--a family--a fireside1--will lead its possessor to activity in all his conduct4 ,it will elicit his talents1 and urge them to their full energy1 and probably call in the aid of economy2 a quality so indispensable to every condition of life4 ,the single consideration1 ',what would she think were she now to see me8' called up by the obtrusion of a favorite image1--how often has it stimulated a noble mind and heart to deeds which otherwise had never been performed6 ,i repeat it1 ,i am aware that this advice is liable to abuse4 ,but what shall be done8 ,images of some sort will haunt the mind more or less--female influence in some shape or other will operate4 ,is it not better to give the imagination a virtuous direction than to leave it to range without control1 and without end8 ,i repeat it1 nothing is better calculated to preserve a young man from the contamination of low pleasures and pursuits1 than frequent intercourse with the more refined and virtuous of the other sex4 ,besides1 without such society his manners can never acquire the true polish of a gentleman1--general character1 dignity1 and refinement2--nor his mind and heart the truest and noblest sentiments of a man4 ,make it an object then1 ,i again say1 to spend some portion of every week of your life in the company of intelligent and virtuous ladies4 ,at all events1 flee solitude1 and especially the exclusive society of your own sex4 ,the doctrines even of ,zimmerman1 the great apostle of solitude1 would put to shame many young men1 who seldom or never mix in female society4 ,if you should be so unfortunate as not to have among your acquaintance any ladies whose society would1 in these points of view1 be profitable to you1 do not be in haste to mix with the ignorant and vulgar2 but wait patiently till your own industry and good conduct shall give you admission to better circles2 and in the meantime cultivate your mind by reading and thinking1 so that when you actually gain admission to good society1 you may know how to prize and enjoy it4 ,remember1 too1 that you are not to be so selfish as to think nothing of contributing to the happiness of others4 ,it is blessed to give as well as to receive4 ,when you are in the company of ladies1 beware of silliness4 ,it is true that they will sooner forgive foolishness than ill manners1 but you will1 of course1 avoid both4 ,i know one young gentleman of great promise1 who adopted the opinion that in order to qualify himself for female society1 he had only to become as foolish as possible1 while in their presence4 ,that young man soon lost the favor of all whose friendship might have operated as a restraint2 but unwilling to associate with the despicable1 and unable to live in absolute solitude1 he chose the bottle for his companion2 and made himself1 and the few friends he had1 miserable4 ,nothing1 unless it be the coarsest flattery1 will give more offence1 in the end1 than to treat ladies as mere playthings or children4 ,on the other hand1 do not become pedantic1 and lecture them on difficult subjects4 ,they readily see through all this4 ,neither is it good manners or policy to talk much of yourself4 ,they can penetrate this also2 and they despise the vanity which produces it4 ,in detecting deception1 they are often much quicker than we apprehend4 ,a young gentleman1 in one of the ,new ,england ,states1 who had assumed the chair of the pedagogue1 paid his addresses to the beautiful and sensible daughter of a respectable farmer4 ,one day1 as she was present in his school1 he read to her a hymn1 which he said was from his own pen4 ,now it was obvious to this lady1 and even to some of the pupils1 that the hymn was none other than that usually known by the name of the ',harvest ,hymn1' modified by the change of a few words only4 ,how much effect this circumstance might have had ,i cannot say with certainty2 but ,i know it disgusted one1 at least1 of the pupils2 and ,i know1 too1 that his addresses to the lady were soon afterwards discontinued4 ,a young man who would profit from the society of young ladies1 or indeed from any society1 must preserve a modest and respectful spirit2 must seek to conciliate their good will by quiet and unostentatious attentions1 and discover more willingness to avail himself of their stock of information1 than to display his own knowledge or abilities4 ,he should observe1 and learn to admire1 that purity and ignorance of evil1 which is the characteristic of well-educated young ladies1 and which1 while we are near them1 raises us above those sordid and sensual considerations which hold such sway over men1 in their intercourse with each other4 ,he should treat them as spirits of a purer sphere1 and try to be as innocent1 if not as ignorant of evil as they are2 remembering that there is no better way of raising himself in the scale of intellectual and moral being4 ,but to whatever degree of intimacy he may arrive1 he should never forget those little acts of courtesy and kindness1 as well as that respect1 and self-denial1 which lend a charm to every kind of polite intercourse1 and especially to that of which ,i am now speaking4 ,whenever an opportunity occurs1 however1 it is the duty of a young man to introduce topics of conversation which are decidedly favorable to mental and moral improvement4 ,should he happen to be attending to the same study1 or reading the same book with a female acquaintance1 an excellent opportunity will be afforded for putting this rule in practice4 ,,chapter ,,vi4 ,marriage4 ,,section ,i4 ,why ,matrimony is a ,duty4 ,matrimony is a subject of high importance and interest4 ,it is important1 because it was among the earliest institutions of the great ,creator2 because it has always existed in some form or other1 and must continue to exist1 or society cannot be sustained2 and because in proportion as the ends of the ,creator are answered by its establishment1 just in the same proportion does the happiness of society rise or fall4 ,it points out the condition of society in this respect as accurately as a thermometer shows the temperature of the surrounding atmosphere4 ,i might even go farther1 and say1 that in proportion as the original and real ends of marriage are answered1 do the interests of religion also rise or sink4#aa ,this institution is peculiarly interesting from the fact that it involves so many items of human happiness4 ,we often speak of the value of friendship4 ,what friendship like that which results from a happy union of the sexes8 ,we talk of education4 ,what school so favorable to improvement as the domestic circle may be rendered8 ,whether we consider education in a physical1 mental or moral point of view1 all its plans are imperfect without this4 ,no man or woman is1 as a general rule1 fully prepared for the humblest sphere of action on earth1 without the advantages which are peculiar to this institution4 ,nor has any man done his whole duty to ,god1 who has left this subject out of consideration4 ,it has sometimes been said1 and with much truth1 that 'no unmarried person was ever thoroughly and completely educated4' ,it appears to me that were we to consider the intellectual and physical departments of education1 merely1 this would be true2 but how much more so when we take in morals8 ,parents1--teachers1--what are they8 ,their labors are indeed of infinite value1 in themselves considered2 but it is only in a state of matrimony1 it is only when we are called to the discharge of those multiplied duties which are involved in the endearing relations of husband1 wife1 parent and guardian1 that our characters are fully tested and established4 ,late in life as these relations commence1 the circumstances which they involve are so peculiar that they modify the character of the parties much more than has usually been considered4 ,i am fond1 therefore1 of contemplating the married state as a school2--not merely for a short term1 but for life2--not one whose teachers are liable to be changed once or twice a year to the great disadvantage of all who are concerned1 but whose instructors are as permanent as the school itself4 ,it is true1 that like other schools1 it may result in the formation of bad character2 but in proportion to its power to accomplish either good or bad results1 will be its value1 if wisely improved4 ,it is not to be denied that this view of the subject is in favor of early marriage4 ,and ,i can truly say1 indeed1 that every thing considered1 early marriage does appear to me highly desirable4 ,and it would require stronger arguments than any which ,i have yet seen adduced1 even by some of our political economists1 to make me surrender this opinion4 ,the only serious objection1 of a popular kind1 to early marriage1 arises from the difficulty of supporting a family4 ,but the parties themselves must be supported at all events1 whether married or single4 ',but the consequences'--,and what are the consequences8 ,an earlier family1 indeed2 but not of necessity a larger4 ,i believe that facts will bear me out in stating that the sum total of the progeny of every thousand families who commence at from twenty-five to thirty1 is as great as that of one thousand who begin at from twenty to twenty-five4 ,i have even seen pretty large families where the eldest was thirty-five years younger than both the parents2 and one or two instances of numerous families where marriage did not take place till the age of forty4 ,physiologists have long observed this singular fact1 and it has sometimes been explained by saying1 if indeed it be an explanation1 that ,nature1 in these cases1 unwilling to be cheated out of her rights1 endeavors to make up in energy and activity what has been lost in time4 ,the question1 however1 will recur1 whether families1 though equally large1 cannot be better maintained when marriage is deferred to a later period4 ,and it certainly is a question of immense importance2 ,for nothing is more painful than to see large families1 whose parents1 whether young or more advanced1 have not the means of educating them properly4 ,it is also not a little painful to find instances of poverty so extreme that there is absolute suffering1 for want of food and clothing4 ,but the question must be determined by facts4 ,and it would be greatly aiding the cause of humanity if extensive comparisons were made between the pecuniary condition of those who marry early and those who defer the subject to a later period4 ,but from my own limited observation ,i am fully of opinion that the result of the comparison would be greatly in favor of early marriages4 ,should this prove to be true1 the position which ,i have assumed is1 ,i think1 established2 for it appears to me that no other argument for delay has any claim to our notice4 ,on the other hand1 the following1 among other evils1 are the results of deferring marriage4 #a4 ,the temper and habits of the parties become stiff and unyielding when advanced in life1 and they learn to adapt themselves to each other with difficulty4 ,in the view which ,i have taken above they become miserable as teachers1 and still more miserable as scholars4 #b4 ,youth are thus exposed to the danger of forming habits of criminal indulgence1 as fatal to the health and the character1 as they are ruinous to the soul4 #c4 ,or if they proceed not so far1 they at least acquire the habit of spending time in vain or pernicious amusements4 ,all mankind must and will seek for gratifications of some sort or other4 ,and aside from religious principle1 there is no certain security against those amusements and indulgences which are pernicious and destructive1 but early and virtuous attachments1 and the pleasures afforded by domestic life4 ,he can never want for amusement or rational gratification who is surrounded by a rising family for whom he has a genuine affection4 #d4 ,long continued celibacy contracts the mind1 if it does not enfeeble it4 ,for one openhearted liberal old bachelor1 you will find ten who are parsimonious1 avaricious1 cold-hearted1 and too often destitute of those sympathies for their fellow beings which the married life has a tendency to elicit and perpetuate4#ab #e4 ,franklin says that late marriages are attended with another inconvenience1 viz42 that the chance of living to see our children educated1 is greatly diminished4 #f4 ,but ,i go much farther than ,i have hitherto done1 and insist that other things being equal1 the young married man has the advantage in a pecuniary point of view4 ,this is a natural result from the fact that he is compelled to acquire habits of industry1 frugality1 and economy2 and is under less temptation to waste his time in trifling or pernicious amusements4 ,but ,i may appeal to facts1 even here4 ,look around you in the world1 and see if out of a given number of single persons1 say one thousand1 of the age of thirty-five1 there be not a greater number in poverty1 than of the same number who settled in life at twenty4 ,perhaps ,i ought barely to notice another objection to these views4 ,it is said that neither the mind nor the body come to full maturity so early as we are apt to suppose4 ,but is complete maturity of body or mind indispensable8 ,i am not advocating the practice of marrying in childhood4 ,it takes sometime for the affections toward an individual to ripen and become settled4 ,this is a matter involving too high responsibilities to justify haste4 ,the consequences1 speaking generally1 are not confined to this life2 they extend to eternity4 #aa ,some of the topics of this section have been anticipated1 in part1 in a previous chapter2 but their importance entitles them to a farther consideration4 #ab ,i know this principle is sometimes disputed4 ,a late ,english writer1 in a ,treatise on ,happiness1 at page #bea of ,vol4 ,,ii1 maintains the contrary4 ,he quotes from ,lord ,bacon1 that ',unmarried men are the best friends1 best masters1 and best servants1' and that ',the best works1 and of greatest merit for the public1 have proceeded from unmarried or childless men4' ,he also introduces ,jeremy ,taylor1 as saying that ',celibacy1 like a fly in the heart of an apple1 dwells in perpetual sweetness4' ,in commenting upon these remarks1 this writer says1 ',one half of the most eminent persons that have ever lived in the world of science and literature1 have remained unmarried1' and 'in the connubial state1 too frequently1 the sympathies are connected within the family circle1 while there is little generosity or philanthropy beyond4' ,and lastly1 that ',unmarried men possess many natural excellences1 which if not engrossed by a family will be directed towards their fellow creatures4' ,now it is admitted that many eminent men1 especially in science and literature1 have been bachelors2 and that among them were ,newton and ,locke4 ,but this only proves that while thousands and tens of thousands of their fellow beings spent their lives in insignificance1 for want of a definite object to live for1 these men1 having an object before them1 accomplished something4 ,and if you could induce one single man in a thousand1 nay1 one in ten thousand1 to make a similar use of his exemption from the cares of a family1 much might be expected from celibacy2 or at least1 the results of their labors might be a partial compensation to society for the evil tendency of their example4 ,for marriage cannot be denied to be an institution of ,god1 and indispensable to the existence of society4 ,and who can say that he has purchased an indulgence to disobey a law which is in some respects paramount to every other1 however great the price he may have paid8 ,that marriage tends to concentrate our sympathies within the family circle1 ,i do not believe4 ,a proper investigation of the subject will1 ,i am certain1 prove this assumption unfounded4 ,facts do not show unmarried men to be 'best friends1 masters1 servants' c42 and ,i am sorry to find such a theory maintained by any sensible writer4 ,some of the illustrious examples of celibacy which are usually brought1 were by no means estimable for their social feelings or habits4 ,what would become of mankind1 if they were all to immure themselves in dungeons1 or what is nearly the same thing to social life1 among books and papers8 ,better1 by far1 to remain in ignorance of the material laws which govern the universe1 than to become recluses in a world like this4 ,better even dispense with some of the lights which genius has struck out to enable us to read suns and stars1 than to understand attraction in the material world1 while we are insensible to all attractions of a moral and social kind4 ,god has made us to feel1 to sympathize1 and to love1--as well as to know4 ,,section ,,ii4 ,general ,considerations4 ,we are now to enter on a most important part of our subject4 ,hitherto it had been my object to point out the proper course for you to pursue in reference to yourself1 your own improvement1 and consequent usefulness4 ,in the remarks of the preceding chapter1 and in those which follow1 you are regarded as seeking a companion2 as anxious to assume new relations1 such as involve new duties and new responsibilities4 ,if you are successful1 instead of educating yourself alone1 you are to be concerned in improving the mental1 moral1 and social condition of two persons2 and in the end1 perhaps others4 ,you are to be a teacher2 you cannot avoid this station if you would4 ,but you are also to be a learner4 ,dr4 ,rush says we naturally imitate the manners1 and gradually acquire the tempers of persons with whom we live1 provided they are objects of our affection and respect4 ',this1' he adds1 'has been observed in husbands and wives who have lived long and happily together2 and even in servants4' ,and nothing can be more true4 ,not only your temper and that of your companion1 but your whole character1 considered as physical1 mental1 and moral beings1 will be mutually improved or injured through life4 ,you will be placed1 as ,i have already intimated1 at a school of mutual instruction1 which is to continue without vacation or change of monitors1--perhaps half a century2--during every one of the earliest years of which1 your character will be more really and more permanently modified than in the same amount of time at any prior period of your education1 unless it were in the veriest infancy4 ,surely then it is no light affair to make preparation for a school like this4 ,there is no period in the life of a young man so important2 for there is none on which his happiness and the happiness of others so essentially depend4 ,before ,i advert to the particular qualifications which it is necessary for you to seek in so intimate a friend1 ,i shall mention a few considerations of a general nature4 ,settle it1 in the first place1 that absolute perfection is not to be found4 ,there are not a few young men of a romantic turn of mind1 fostered and increased by reading the fictitious writings of the day1 who have pictured to themselves for companions in life unreal forms and angelic characters1 instead of beings who dwell in 'houses of clay1' and are 'crushed before the moth4' ,such 'exalted imaginations' must sooner or later be brought down3 happy will it be with those who are chastened in due season4 ,in the second place1 resolve never to be misled by any adventitious circumstances4 ,wealth1 beauty1 rank1 friends1 c1 are all proper considerations1 but they are not of the first importance4 ,they are merely secondary qualifications4 ,marriage must never be a matter of bargain and sale2 for ,in the third place1 no marriage engagement should ever be thought of unless there is first a genuine and rational attachment4 ,no cold calculations of profit or loss1 no hereditary estates or other adventitious circumstances1 though they were equivalent to a peerage1 or a realm1 should ever1 for one moment1 even in thought1 be substituted for love4 ,it is treason to ,him who ordained this most blessed institution4 ,but fourthly1 though wealth1 however valuable in itself1 is by no means a recommendation in the present case1 yet the means of a comfortable support are certainly to be regarded4 ,it is painful to see a very young couple1 with a large family1 and destitute of the means of support4 ,in the fifth place1 a suitable age is desirable4 ,when we consider the varying tastes1 habits and feelings of the same person at different periods of his life1 is it not at once obvious that1 other things being equal1 those persons are most likely to find that happiness which is sought in matrimony1 by associating with those whose age does not differ greatly from their own8 ,it is true1 some of the happiest human connexions that ever were formed were between persons of widely differing ages2 but is this the general rule8 ,would not those who have found happiness under other circumstances1 have been still happier1 had their ages been more nearly equal8 ,there is little doubt that a person advanced in life may lengthen his days by a connection with a person much younger than himself4 ,whether the life of the other party is not shortened1 in an equal degree1 at the same time1 and by the same means1 remains to be determined2 but probably it is so4 ,some men and women are as old1 in reality1 whatever their years may indicate1 at twenty1 as others at twenty-five4 ,the matrimonial connection then may be safely formed between parties whose ages differ a few years2 but ,i think that as a general rule1 the ages of the parties ought to be nearly equal4 ,lastly1 it was believed by a great observer of human nature1 the late ,dr4 ,spurzheim1 that no person was fit for the domestic relations who had not undergone trials and sufferings4 ,the gay reader may smile at this opinion1 but ,i can assure him that many wise men besides ,spurzheim have entertained it4 ,chateaubriand1 among others1 in his ',genius of ,christianity1' advances the same opinion4 ,some1 as we have seen1 hold that no person can be well educated without suffering4 ,such persons1 however1 use the term education as meaning something more than a little scientific instruction2--as a means of forming character4 ,in this point of view no sentiment can be more true4 ,even the ,bible confirms it1 when it assures us1 that the ',captain of our ,salvation was made perfect through sufferings4' ,,section ,,iii4 ,female ,qualifications for ,marriage4 #a4 ,,moral ,,excellence4 ,the highest as well as noblest trait in female character1 is love to ,god4 ,when we consider what are the tendencies of ,christianity to elevate woman from the state of degradation to which she had1 for ages1 been subjected--when we consider not only what it has done1 but what it is destined yet to do for her advancement1--it is impossible not to shrink from the presence of an impious1 and above all an unprincipled atheistical female1 as from an ungrateful and unnatural being4 ,man is under eternal obligations to ,christianity and its ,divine ,author1 undoubtedly2 but woman seems to be more so4 ,that charge against females which in the minds of some half atheistical men is magnified into a stigma on ,christianity itself1 namely that they are more apt to become religious than men2 and that we find by far the greater part of professing ,christians to be females1 is in my own view one of the highest praises of the sex4 ,i rejoice that their hearts are more susceptible than ours1 and that they do not war so strongly against that religion which their nature demands4 ,i have met with but one female1 whom ,i knew to be an avowed atheist4 ,indeed there are very few men to be found1 who are skeptical themselves1 who do not prefer pious companions of the other sex4 ,i will not stop to adduce this as an evidence of the truth of our religion itself1 and of its adaptation to the wants of the human race1 for happily it does not need it4 ,christianity is based on the most abundant evidence1 of a character wholly unquestionable4 ,but this ,i do and will say1 that to be consistent1 young men of loose principles ought not to rail at females for their piety1 and then whenever they seek for a constant friend1 one whom they can love1--for they never really love the abandoned--always prefer1 other things being equal1 the society of the pious and the virtuous4 #b4 ,,common ,,sense4 ,next on the list of particular qualifications in a female1 for matrimonial life1 ,i place ,,common ,,sense4 ,in the view of some1 it ought to precede moral excellence4 ,a person1 it is said1 who is deficient in common sense1 is1 in proportion to the imbecility1 unfit for social life1 and yet the same person might possess a kind of negative excellency1 or perhaps even a species of piety4 ,this view appears to me1 however1 much more specious than sound4 ,by common sense1 as used in this place1 ,i mean the faculty by means of which we see things as they really are4 ,it implies judgment and discrimination1 and a proper sense of propriety in regard to the common concerns of life4 ,it leads us to form judicious plans of action1 and to be governed by our circumstances in such a way as will be generally approved4 ,it is the exercise of reason1 uninfluenced by passion or prejudice4 ,to man1 it is nearly what instinct is to brutes4 ,it is very different from genius or talent1 as they are commonly defined2 but much better than either4 ,it never blazes forth with the splendor of noon1 but shines with a constant and useful light4 ,to the housewife--but1 above all1 to the mother1--it is indispensable4 #c4 ,,desire ,,for ,,improvement4 ,whatever other recommendations a lady may possess1 she should have an inextinguishable thirst for improvement4 ,no sensible person can be truly happy in the world1 without this2 much less qualified to make others happy4 ,but the genuine spirit of improvement1 wherever it exists1 atones for the absence of many qualities which would otherwise be indispensable3 in this respect resembling that 'charity' which covers 'a multitude of sins4' ,without it1 almost everything would be of little consequence1--with it1 every thing else is rendered doubly valuable4 ,one would think that every sensible person1 of either sex1 would aspire at improvement1 were it merely to avoid the shame of being stationary like the brutes4 ,above all1 it is most surprising that any lady should be satisfied to pass a day or even an hour without mental and moral progress4 ,it is no discredit to the lower animals that--'their little all flows in at once1' that 'in ages they no more can know1 or covet or enjoy1' for this is the legitimate result of the physical constitution which ,god has given them4 ,but it is far otherwise with the masters and mistresses of creation2 for ',were man to live coeval with the sun1 ,the patriarch pupil should be learning still1 ,and dying1 leave his lessons half unlearnt4' ,there are1--,i am sorry to say it--not a few of both sexes who never appear to breathe out one hearty desire to rise1 intellectually or morally1 with a view to the government of themselves or others4 ,they love themselves supremely--their friends subordinately--their neighbors1 perhaps not at all4 ,but neither the love they bear to themselves or others ever leads them to a single series of any sort of action which has for its ultimate object the improvement of any thing higher than the condition of the mere animal4 ,dress1 personal appearance1 equipage1 style of a dwelling or its furniture1 with no other view1 however1 than the promotion of mere physical enjoyment1 is the height of their desires for improvement6 ,talk to them of elevating the intellect or improving the heart1 and they admit it is true2 but they go their way and pursue their accustomed round of folly again4 ,the probability is1 that though they assent to your views1 they do not understand you4 ,it requires a stretch of charity to which ,i am wholly unequal1 to believe that beings who ever conceived1 for one short moment1 of the height to which their natures may be elevated1 should sink back without a single struggle1 to a mere selfish1 unsocial1 animal life2--to lying in bed ten or twelve hours daily1 rising three or four hours later than the sun1 spending the morning in preparation at the glass1 the remainder of the time till dinner in unmeaning calls1 the afternoon in yawning over a novel1 and the evening in the excitement of the tea table and the party1 and the ball room1 to retire1 perhaps at midnight1 with the mind and body and soul in a feverish state1 to toss away the night in vapid or distressing dreams4 ,how beings endowed with immortal souls can be contented to while away precious hours in a manner so useless1 and withal so displeasing to the ,god who gave them their time for the improvement of themselves and others1 is to me absolutely inconceivable6 ,yet it is certainly done2 and that not merely by a few solitary individuals scattered up and down the land2 but in some of our most populous cities1 by considerable numbers4 ,a philanthropic individual not long since undertook with the aid of others1 to establish a weekly or semi-weekly gazette in one of our cities1 for almost the sole purpose1 as ,i have since learned1 of rousing the drones among her sex to benevolent action in some form or other1 in behalf of members of their families1 their friends or their neighbors4 ,she hoped1 at first1 to save them from many hours of ennui by the perusal of her columns2 and that their minds being opened to instruction1 and their hearts made to vibrate in sympathy with the cries of ignorance1 poverty1 or absolute distress1 their hands might be roused to action4 ,but alas1 the articles in the paper were too long1 or too dry4 ,they could not task their minds to go through with an argument4 ,should the young man who is seeking an 'help meet1' chance to fall in with such beings as these--and some we fear there are in almost every part of our land1--let him shun them as he would the 'choke damp' of the cavern4 ,their society would extinguish1 rather than fan the flame of every generous or benevolent feeling that might be kindling in his bosom4 ,with the fond1 the ardent1 the never failing desire to improve1 physically1 intellectually1 and morally1 there are few females who may not make tolerable companions for a man of sense2--without it1 though a young lady were beautiful and otherwise lovely beyond comparison1 wealthy as the ,indies1 surrounded by thousands of the most worthy friends1 and even talented1 let him beware6 ,better remain in celibacy a thousand years 7could life last so long7 great as the evil may be1 than form a union with such an object4 ,he should pity1 and seek her reformation1 if not beyond the bounds of possibility2 but love her he should not6 ,the penalty will be absolutely insupportable4 ,one point ought to be settled1--,i think unalterably settled--before matrimony4 ,it ought indeed so be settled in early life1 but it is better late1 perhaps1 than never4 ,each of the parties should consider themselves as sacredly pledged1 in all cases1 to yield to conviction4 ,i have no good opinion of the man who expects his wife to yield her opinion to his1 on every occasion1 unless she is convinced4 ,i say on every occasion2 for that she sometimes ought to do so1 seems to be both scriptural and rational4 ,it would be very inconvenient to call in a third person as an umpire upon every slight difference of opinion between a young couple1 besides being very humiliating4 ,but if each maintain1 with pertinacity1 their opinion1 what can be done8 ,it does seem to me that every sensible woman1 who feels any good degree of confidence in her husband1 will perceive the propriety of yielding her opinion to his in such cases1 where the matter is of such a nature that it cannot be delayed4 ,but there are a thousand things occurring1 in which there is no necessity of forming an immediate opinion1 or decision1 except from conviction4 ,i should never like the idea of a woman's conforming to her husband's views to please him1 merely1 without considering whether they are correct or not4 ,it seems to me a sort of treason against the ,god who gave her a mind of her own1 with an intention that she should use it4 ,but it would be higher treason still1 in male1 or female1 not to yield1 when actually convinced4 #d4 ,,fondness ,,for ,,children4 ,few traits of female character are more important than this4 ,yet there is much reason to believe that1 even in contemplating an engagement that is expected to last for life1 it is almost universally overlooked4 ,without it1 though a woman should possess every accomplishment of person1 mind1 and manners1 she would be poor indeed2 and would probably render those around her miserable4 ,i speak now generally4 ,there may be exceptions to this1 as to other general rules4 ,a dislike of children1 even in men1 is an unfavorable omen2 in woman it is insupportable2 for it is grossly unnatural4 ,to a susceptible1 intelligent1 virtuous mind1 ,i can scarcely conceive of a worse situation in this world or any other1 than to be chained for life to a person who hates children4 ,you can purchase1 if you have the pecuniary means1 almost every thing but maternal love4 ,this no gold can buy4 ,wo to the female who is doomed to drag out a miserable existence with a husband who 'can't bear children2' but thrice miserable is the doom of him who has a wife and a family of children1 but whose children have no mother6 ,if there be orphans any where in the wide world1 they are these4#ac ,the more ,i reflect on the four last mentioned traits of female character1 the more they rise in my estimation1 eclipsing all others2 unless perhaps1 a good temper4 ,it is said that after every precaution1 the choice of a wife is like buying a ticket in a lottery4 ,if we were absolutely deaf and blind in the selection1 and were so from necessity1 the maxim might be just4 ,but this is not so4 ,we shut our eyes and stop our ears voluntarily1 and then complain of the imperfection of our means of forming a judgment4 ,in truth we impeach the goodness of ,him who was the author of the institution4 ,no young man is worthy of a wife who has not sense enough to determine1 even after a few interviews1 what the bent of a lady's mind is2--whether she listens with most pleasure to conversation which is wholly unimproving1 or whether she gladly turns from it1 when an opportunity offers1 to subjects which are above the petty chit-chat or common but fashionable scandal of the day2 and above all1 avoids retailing it4 ,he knows1 or may know1 without a 'seven years' acquaintance1 whether she spends a part of her leisure time in reading1 or whether the whole is spent in dressing1 visiting1 or conversing about plays1 actors1 theatres1 c4 ,and if she reads a part of the time1 the fault must be his own1 if he does not know whether she relishes any thing but the latest novel1 or the most light--not to say empty--periodical4 ,let it be remembered1 then1 by every young man that the fault is his own1 if he do not give himself time1 before he forms an engagement that is to last for life1 to ascertain whether his friendship is to be formed with a person who is desirous of improvement1 or with one who1 living only for pleasure1 is 'dead while she liveth4' ,you will say it is difficult to ascertain whether she is fond of children or not4 ,but ,i doubt it4 ,has she then no young brothers1 or sisters1 or cousins8 ,are there no children in the neighborhood8 ,for if there are1--if there is but one1 and she sees that individual but once a week1--the fact may easily be ascertained4 ,if she loves that child1 the child will love her2 and its eye will brighten when it sees her1 or hears her name mentioned4 ,children seldom fail to keep debt and credit in these matters1 and they know how to balance the account1 with great ingenuity4 ,these remarks are made1 not in the belief that they will benefit those who are already blinded by fancy or passion1 but with the hope that some more fortunate reader may reflect on the probable chances of happiness or misery1 and pause before he leaps into the vortex of matrimonial discord4 ,no home can ever be a happy one to any of its inmates1 where there is no maternal love1 nor any desire for mental or moral improvement4 ,but where these exist1 in any considerable degree1 and the original attachment was founded on correct principles1 there is always hope of brighter days1 even though clouds at present obscure the horizon4 ,no woman who loves her husband1 and desires to make continual improvement1 will long consent to render those around her unhappy4 #ac ,it is worthy of remark1 as a well established fact1 that the ,chinese have an ,isan-mon or mother1 to their silkworms6 ,her duty is1 not to attend to the eggs and the hatching1 for nature has made provision for that2 but to take possession of the chamber where the young are deposited2 to see that it be free from 'noisome smells1 and all noises2' to attend to its temperature1 and to 'avoid making a smoke1 or raising a dust4' ,she must not enter the room till she is perfectly clean in person and dress1 and must be clothed in a very plain habit2 and in order to be more sensible to the temperature of the place1 her dress must contain no lining4 ,now although every mother of children does not have the care of silkworms1 yet she has the care of beings who are in some respects equally susceptible4 ,and ,i trust no person who knows the importance of temperature1 ventilation1 c4 especially to the tender infant1 will be ashamed to derive an important lesson from the foregoing4 #e4 ,,love ,,of ,,domestic ,,concerns4 ,without the knowledge and the love of domestic concerns1 even the wife of a peer1 is but a poor affair4 ,it was the fashion1 in former times1 for ladies to understand a great deal about these things1 and it would be very hard to make me believe that it did not tend to promote the interests and honor of their husbands4 ,the concerns of a great family never can be well managed1 if left wholly to hirelings2 and there are many parts of these affairs in which it would be unseemly for husbands to meddle4 ,surely1 no lady can be too high in rank to make it proper for her to be well acquainted with the character and general demeanor of all the female servants4 ,to receive and give character is too much to be left to a servant1 however good1 whose service has been ever so long1 or acceptable4 ,much of the ease and happiness of the great and rich must depend on the character of those by whom they are assisted4 ,they live under the same roof with them2 they are frequently the children of their tenants1 or poorer neighbors2 the conduct of their whole lives must be influenced by the examples and precepts which they here imbibe2 and when ladies consider how much more weight there must be in one word from them1 than in ten thousand words from a person who1 call her what you like1 is still a fellow servant1 it does appear strange that they should forego the performance of this at once important and pleasing part of their duty4 ,i am1 however1 addressing myself1 in this work1 to persons in the middle ranks of life2 and here a knowledge of domestic affairs is so necessary in every wife1 that the lover ought to have it continually in his eye4 ,not only a knowledge of these affairs--not only to know how things ought to be done1 but how to do them2 not only to know what ingredients ought to be put into a pie or a pudding1 but to be able to make the pie or the pudding4 ,young people1 when they come together1 ought not1 unless they have fortunes1 or are to do unusual business1 to think about servants6 ,servants for what6 ,to help them eat1 and drink1 and sleep8 ,when they have children1 there must be some help in a farmer's or tradesman's house1 but until then1 what call is there for a servant in a house1 the master of which has to earn every mouthful that is consumed8 ,eating and drinking come three times every day2 they must come2 and1 however little we may1 in the days of our health and vigor1 care about choice food and about cookery1 we very soon get tired of heavy or burnt bread1 and of spoiled joints of meat4 ,we bear them for once or twice perhaps2 but about the third time1 we begin to lament2 about the fifth time1 it must be an extraordinary affair that will keep us from complaining2 if the like continue for a month or two1 we begin to repent2 and then adieu to all our anticipated delights4 ,we discover1 when it is too late1 that we have not got a helpmate1 but a burden2 and1 the fire of love being damped1 the unfortunately educated creature1 whose parents are more to blame than she is1 unless she resolve to learn her duty1 is doomed to lead a life very nearly approaching to that of misery2 for1 however considerate the husband1 he never can esteem her as he would have done1 had she been skilled in domestic affairs4 ,the mere manual performance of domestic labors is not1 indeed1 absolutely necessary in the female head of the family of professional men2 but1 even here1 and also in the case of great merchants and of gentlemen living on their fortunes1 surely the head of the household ought to be able to give directions as to the purchasing of meal1 salting meat1 making bread1 making preserves of all sorts2 and ought to see the things done4 ,the lady ought to take care that food be well cooked2 that there be always a sufficient supply2 that there be good living without waste2 and that in her department1 nothing shall be seen inconsistent with the rank1 station1 and character of her husband4 ,if he have a skilful and industrious wife1 he will1 unless he be of a singularly foolish turn1 gladly leave all these things to her absolute dominion1 controlled only by the extent of the whole expenditure1 of which he must be the best judge4 ,but1 in a farmer's or a tradesman's family1 the manual performance is absolutely necessary1 whether there be domestics or not4 ,no one knows how to teach another so well as one who has done1 and can do1 the thing himself4 ,it was said of a famous ,french commander1 that1 in attacking an enemy1 he did not say to his men 'go on1' but 'come on2' and1 whoever has well observed the movements of domestics1 must know what a prodigious difference there is in the effect of the words1 go and come4 ,a very good rule would be1 to have nothing to eat1 in a farmer's or mechanic's house1 that the mistress did not know how to prepare and to cook2 no pudding1 tart1 pie or cake1 that she did not know how to make4 ,never fear the toil to her3 exercise is good for health2 and without health there is no beauty4 ,besides1 what is the labor in such a case8 ,and how many thousands of ladies1 who idle away the day1 would give half their fortunes for that sound sleep which the stirring housewife seldom fails to enjoy4 ,yet1 if a young farmer or mechanic marry a girl1 who has been brought up only to 'play music2' to draw1 to sing1 to waste paper1 pen and ink in writing long and half romantic letters1 and to see shows1 and plays1 and read novels2--if a young man do marry such an unfortunate young creature1 let him bear the consequences with temper4 ,let him be just4 ,justice will teach him to treat her with great indulgence2 to endeavor to persuade her to learn her business as a wife2 to be patient with her2 to reflect that he has taken her1 being apprized of her inability2 to bear in mind1 that he was1 or seemed to be1 pleased with her showy and useless acquirements2 and that1 when the gratification of his passion has been accomplished1 he is unjust1 and cruel1 and unmanly1 if he turn round upon her1 and accuse her of a want of that knowledge1 which he well knew1 beforehand1 she did not possess4 ,for my part1 ,i do not know1 nor can ,i form an idea of1 a more unfortunate being than a girl with a mere boarding school education1 and without a fortune to enable her to keep domestics1 when married4 ,of what use are her accomplishments8 ,of what use her music1 her drawing1 and her romantic epistles8 ,if she should chance to possess a sweet disposition1 and good nature1 the first faint cry of her first babe drives all the tunes and all the landscapes1 and all the imaginary beings out of her head for ever4 ,the farmer or the tradesman's wife has to help earn a provision for her children2 or1 at the least1 to help to earn a store for sickness or old age4 ,she ought1 therefore1 to be qualified to begin1 at once1 to assist her husband in his earnings4 ,the way in which she can most efficiently assist1 is by taking care of his property2 by expending his money to the greatest advantage2 by wasting nothing1 but by making the table sufficiently abundant with the least expense4 ,but how is she to do these things1 unless she has been brought up to understand domestic affairs8 ,how is she to do these things1 if she has been taught to think these matters beneath her study8 ,how is the man to expect her to do these things1 if she has been so bred1 as to make her habitually look upon them as worthy the attention of none but low and ignorant women8 ,ignorant1 indeed6 ,ignorance consists in a want of knowledge of those things which your calling or state of life naturally supposes you to understand4 ,a ploughman is not an ignorant man because he does not know how to read4 ,if he knows how to plough1 he is not to be called an ignorant man2 but a wife may be justly called an ignorant woman1 if she does not know how to provide a dinner for her husband4 ,it is cold comfort for a hungry man1 to tell him how delightfully his wife plays and sings4 ,lovers may live on very aerial diet1 but husbands stand in need of something more solid2 and young women may take my word for it1 that a constantly clean table1 well cooked victuals1 a house in order1 and a cheerful fire1 will do more towards preserving a husband's heart1 than all the 'accomplishments' taught in all the 'establishments' in the world without them4 #f4 ,,sobriety4 ,surely no reasonable young man will expect sobriety in a companion1 when he does not possess this qualification himself4 ,but by sobriety1 ,i do not mean a habit which is opposed to intoxication1 for if that be hateful in a man1 what must it be in a woman8 ,besides1 it does seem to me that no young man1 with his eyes open1 and his other senses perfect1 needs any caution on that point4 ,drunkenness1 downright drunkenness1 is usually as incompatible with purity1 as it is with decency4 ,much is sometimes said in favor of a little wine or other fermented liquors1 especially at dinner4 ,no young lady1 in health1 needs any of these stimulants4 ,wine1 or ale1 or cider1 at dinner6 ,i would as soon take a companion from the streets1 as one who must habitually have her glass or two of wine at dinner4 ,and this is not an opinion formed prematurely or hastily4 ,but by the word ,,sobriety in a young woman1 ,i mean a great deal more than even a rigid abstinence from a love of drink1 which ,i do not believe to exist to any considerable degree1 in this country1 even in the least refined parts of it4 ,i mean a great deal more than this2 ,i mean sobriety of conduct4 ,the word sober and its derivatives mean steadiness1 seriousness1 carefulness1 scrupulous propriety of conduct4 ,now this kind of sobriety is of great importance in the person with whom we are to live constantly4 ,skipping1 romping1 rattling girls are very amusing where all consequences are out of the question1 and they may1 perhaps1 ultimately become sober4 ,but while you have no certainty of this1 there is a presumptive argument on the other side4 ,to be sure1 when girls are mere children1 they are expected to play and romp like children4 ,but when they are arrived at an age which turns their thoughts towards a situation for life2 when they begin to think of having the command of a house1 however small or poor1 it is time for them to cast away1 not the cheerfulness or the simplicity1 but the levity of the child4 ',if ,i could not have found a young woman1' says a certain writer1 'who ,i was not sure possessed all the qualities expressed by that word sobriety1 ,i should have remained a bachelor to the end of life4 ,scores of gentlemen have1 at different times1 expressed to me their surprise that ,i was always in spirits2 that nothing pulled me down2 and the truth is1 that throughout nearly forty years of troubles1 losses1 and crosses1 assailed all the while by numerous and powerful enemies1 and performing1 at the same time1 greater mental labors than man ever before performed2 all those labors requiring mental exertion1 and some of them mental exertion of the highest order1 ,i have never known a single hour of real anxiety2 the troubles have been no troubles to me2 ,i have not known what lowness of spirits meant2 and have been more gay1 and felt less care than any bachelor that ever lived4 ,you are always in spirits6 ,to be sure1 for why should ,i not be so8 ,poverty1 ,i have always set at defiance1 and ,i could1 therefore1 defy the temptations to riches2 and as to home and children1 ,i had taken care to provide myself with an inexhaustible store of that sobriety which ,i so strongly recommend to others4 ',this sobriety is a title to trustworthiness2 and this1 young man1 is the treasure that you ought to prize above all others4 ,miserable is the husband who1 when he crosses the threshold of his house1 carries with him doubts1 and fears1 and suspicions4 ,i do not mean suspicions of the fidelity of his wife2 but of her care1 frugality1 attention to his interests1 and to the health and morals of his children4 ,miserable is the man who cannot leave all unlocked2 and who is not sure1 quite certain1 that all is as safe as if grasped in his own hand4 ',he is the happy husband who can go away at a moment's warning1 leaving his house and family with as little anxiety as he quits an inn1 no more fearing to find1 on his return1 any thing wrong1 than he would fear a discontinuance of the rising and setting of the sun2 and if1 as in my case1 leaving books and papers all lying about at sixes and sevens1 finding them arranged in proper order1 and the room1 during the lucky interval1 freed from the effects of his and his ploughman's or gardener's dirty shoes4 ,such a man has no real cares--no troubles2 and this is the sort of life ,i have led4 ,i have had all the numerous and indescribable delights of home and children1 and at the same time1 all the bachelor's freedom from domestic cares4 ',but in order to possess this precious trustworthiness1 you must1 if you can1 exercise your reason in the choice of your partner4 ,if she be vain of her person1 very fond of dress1 fond of flattery at all1 given to gadding about1 fond of what are called parties of pleasure1 or coquetish1 though in the least degree1--she will never be trustworthy2 she cannot change her nature2 and if you marry her1 you will be unjust1 if you expect trustworthiness at her hands4 ,but on the other hand1 if you find in her that innate sobriety of which ,i have been speaking1 there is required on your part1 and that at once1 too1 confidence and trust without any limit4 ,confidence in this case is nothing1 unless it be reciprocal4 ,to have a trustworthy wife1 you must begin by showing her1 even before marriage1 that you have no suspicions1 fears1 or doubts in regard to her4 ,many a man has been discarded by a virtuous girl1 merely on account of his querulous conduct4 ,all women despise jealous men1 and if they marry them1 their motive is other than that of affection4' ,there is a tendency1 in our very natures1 to become what we are taken to be4 ,beware then of suspicion or jealousy1 lest you produce the very thing which you most dread4 ,the evil results of suspicion and jealousy whether in single or married1 public or private life1 may be seen by the following fact4 ,a certain professional gentleman had the misfortune to possess a suspicious temper4 ,he had not a better friend on the earth than ,mr4 ,c41 yet by some unaccountable whim or other1 he began of a sudden to suspect he was his enemy2--and what was at first at the farthest possible remove from the truth1 ultimately grew to be a reality4 ,had it not have been for his jealousy1 ,mr4 ,c4 might have been to this hour one of the doctor's warmest and most confidential friends1 instead of being removed--and in a great measure through his influence--from a useful field of labor4 ',let any man observe as ,i frequently have1' says the writer last quoted1 'with delight1 the excessive fondness of the laboring people for their children4 ,let him observe with what care they dress them out on ,sundays with means deducted from their own scanty meals4 ,let him observe the husband1 who has toiled1 like his horse1 all the week1 nursing the babe1 while the wife is preparing dinner4 ,let him observe them both abstaining from a sufficiency1 lest the children should feel the pinchings of hunger4 ,let him observe1 in short1 the whole of their demeanor1 the real mutual affection evinced1 not in words1 but in unequivocal deeds4 ',let him observe these things1 and having then cast a look at the lives of the great and wealthy1 he will say1 with me1 that when a man is choosing his partner for life1 the dread of poverty ought to be cast to the winds4 ,a laborer's cottage in a cleanly condition2 the husband or wife having a babe in arms1 looking at two or three older ones1 playing between the flower borders1 going from the wicket to the door1 is1 according to my taste1 the most interesting object that eyes ever beheld2 and it is an object to be seen in no country on earth but ,england4' ,it happens1 however1 that the writer had not seen all the countries upon earth1 nor even all in the interior of ,united ,america4 ,there are as moving instances of native simplicity and substantial happiness here as in any other country2 and occasionally in even the higher classes4 ,the wife of a distinguished lawyer and senator in ,congress1 never left the society of her own children1 to go for once to see her friends abroad1 in eleven years6 ,i am not defending the conduct of the husband who would doom his wife to imprisonment in his own house1 even amid a happy group of children1 for eleven years2 but the example shows1 at least1 that there are women fitted for domestic life in other countries besides ,england4 ,ardent young men may fear that great sobriety in a young woman argues a want of that warmth which they naturally so much desire and approve4 ,but observation and experience attest to the contrary4 ,they tell us that levity is ninety-nine times out of a hundred1 the companion of a want of ardent feeling4 ,but the licentious never love4 ,their passion is chiefly animal4 ,even better women1 if they possess light and frivolous minds1 have seldom any ardent passion4 ,i would not1 however1 recommend that you should be too severe in judging1 when the conduct does not go beyond mere levity1 and is not bordering on loose conduct2 for something certainly depends here on constitution and animal spirits1 and something on the manners of the country4 ,if any person imagine that the sobriety ,i have been recommending would render young women moping or gloomy1 he is much mistaken1 for the contrary is the fact4 ,i have uniformly found--and ,i began to observe it in my very childhood--that your jovial souls1 men or women1 except when over the bottle1 are of all human beings the most dull and insipid4 ,they can no more exist--they may vegetate--but they can no more live without some excitement1 than a fish could live on the top of the ,alleghany4 ,if it be not the excitement of the bottle1 it must be that of the tea or the coffee cup1 or food converted into some unwholesome form or other by condiments2 or if it be none of these1 they must have some excitement of the intellect1 for intemperance is not confined to the use of condiments and poisons for the body2 there are condiments and poisons to mind and heart4 ,in fact1 they usually accompany each other4 ,show me a person who cannot live on plain and simple food and the only drink the ,creator ever made1 and as a general rule you will show me a person to whom the plain and the solid and the useful in domestic1 social1 intellectual1 and moral life are insipid if not disgusting4 ',they are welcome to all that sort of labor1' said one of these creatures--not rationals--this very day1 to me1 in relation to plain domestic employments4--,show me a female1 as many1 alas6 very many in fashionable life are now trained1 and you show me a person who has none of the qualities that fit her to be a help meet for man in a life of simplicity4 ,she could recite well at the high school1 no doubt2 but the moment she leaves school1 she has nothing to do1 and is taught to do nothing4 ,i have seen girls1 of this description1 and they may be seen by others4 ,but what is such a female--one who can hardly help herself--good for1 at home or abroad2 married1 or single8 ,the moment she has not some feast1 or party1 or play1 or novel1 or--,i know not what--something to keep up a fever1 the moment ,i say that she has not something of this sort to anticipate or enjoy1 that moment she is miserable4 ,wo to the young man who becomes wedded for life to a creature of this description4 ,she may stay at home1 for want of a better place1 and she may add one to the national census every ten years1 but a companion1 or a mother1 she cannot be4 ,i should dislike a moping melancholy creature as much as any man1 though were ,i tied to such a thing1 ,i could live with her2 but ,i never could enjoy her society1 nor but half of my own4 ,he is but half a man who is thus wedded1 and will exclaim1 in a literal sense1 ',when shall ,i be delivered from the body of this death8' ,one hour1 an animal of this sort is moping1 especially if nobody but her husband is present2 the next hour1 if others happen to be present1 she has plenty of smiles2 the next she is giggling or capering about2 and the next singing to the motion of a lazy needle1 or perhaps weeping over a novel4 ,and this is called sentiment6 ,she is a woman of feeling and good taste6 #g4 ,,industry4 ,let not the individual whose eye catches the word industry1 at the beginning of this division of my subject1 condemn me as degrading females to the condition of mere wheels in a machine for money-making2 for ,i mean no such thing4 ,there is nothing more abhorrent to the soul of a sensible man than female avarice4 ,the 'spirit of a man' may sustain him1 while he sees avaricious and miserly individuals among his own sex1 though the sight is painful enough1 even here2 but a female miser1 'who can bear8' ,still if woman is intended to be a 'help meet1' for the other sex1 ,i know of no reason why she should not be so in physical concerns1 as well as mental and moral4 ,i know not by what rule it is that many resolve to remain for ever in celibacy1 unless they believe their companion can 'support' them1 without labor4 ,i have sometimes even doubted whether any person who makes these declarations can be sincere4 ,yet when ,i hear people1 of both sexes1 speak of poverty as a greater calamity than death1 ,i am led to think that this dread of poverty does really exist among both sexes4 ,and there are reasons for believing that some females1 bred in fashionable life1 look forward to matrimony as a state1 of such entire exemption from care and labor1 and of such uninterrupted ease1 that they would prefer celibacy and even death to those duties which scripture1 and reason1 and common sense1 appear to me to enjoin4 ,such persons1 whatever may be their other qualifications1 ,i call upon every young man to avoid1 as he would a pestilence4 ,if they are really determined to live and act as mere drones in society1 let them live alone4 ,do not give them an opportunity to spread the infection of so wretched a disease1 if you can honestly help it4 ,the woman who does not actually prefer action to inaction--industry to idleness--labor to ease--and who does not steadfastly resolve to labor moderately as long as she lives1 whatever may be her circumstances1 is unfit for life1 social or domestic4 ,it is not for me to say1 in what form her labor shall be applied1 except in rearing the young4 ,but labor she ought--all she is able--while life and health lasts1 at something or other2 or she ought not to complain if she suffers the natural penalty2 and she ought to do it with cheerfulness4 ,i like much the quaint remark of a good old lady of ninety4 ,she was bred to labor1 had labored through the whole of her long and eventful life1 and was still at her 'wheel4' ',why1' said she1 'people ought to strain every nerve to get property1 as a matter of ,christian duty4' ,i should choose to modify this old lady's remark1 and say that1 people ought to do all they can without straining their muscles or nerves2 not to get property1 but because it is at once1 their duty and their happiness4 ,the great object of life is to do good4 ,the great object of society is to increase the power to good4 ,both sexes should aim1 in matrimony1 at a more extended sphere of usefulness4 ,to increase an estate1 merely1 is a low and unworthy aim1 from which may ,god preserve the rising generation4 ,still ,i must say1 that ,i greatly prefer the avaricious being--a monster though she might be--to the stupid soul who would not lift a finger if she could help it1 and who determines to fold her arms whenever she has a convenient opportunity4 ,if a female be lazy1 there will be lazy domestics1 and1 what is a great deal worse1 children will acquire this habit4 ,every thing1 however necessary to be done1 will be put off to the last moment1 and then it will be done badly1 and1 in many cases1 not at all4 ,the dinner will be too late2 the journey or the visit will be tardy2 inconveniences of all sorts will be continually arising4 ,there will always be a heavy arrear of things unperformed2 and this1 even among the most wealthy1 is a great evil2 for if they have no business imposed upon them by necessity1 they make business for themselves4 ,life would be intolerable without it2 and therefore an indolent woman must always be an evil1 be her rank or station what it may4 ,but1 who is to tell whether a girl will make an industrious woman8 ,how is the pur-blind lover especially1 to be able to ascertain whether she1 whose smiles and dimples and bewitching lips have half bereft him of his senses2 how is he to be able to judge1 from any thing that he can see1 whether the beloved object will be industrious or lazy8 ,why1 it is very difficult2 it is a matter that reason has very little to do with4 ,still there are indications which enable a man1 not wholly deprived of the use of his reason1 to form a pretty accurate judgment in this matter4 ,it was a famous story some years ago1 that a young man1 who was courting one of three sisters1 happened to be on a visit to her1 when all the three were present1 and when one said to the others1 ',i wonder where our needle is4' ,upon which he withdrew1 as soon as was consistent with the rules of politeness1 resolving to think no more of a girl who possessed a needle only in partnership1 and who1 it appeared1 was not too well informed as to the place where even that share was deposited4 ,this was1 to be sure1 a very flagrant instance of a want of industry2 for1 if the third part of the use of a needle satisfied her1 when single1 it was reasonable to anticipate that marriage would banish that useful implement altogether4 ,but such instances are seldom suffered to come in contact with the eyes and ears of the lover4 ,there are1 however1 as ,i have already said1 certain rules1 which1 if attended to with care1 will serve as pretty sure guides4 ,and1 first1 if you find the tongue lazy1 you may be nearly certain that the hands and feet are not very industrious4 ,by laziness of the tongue ,i do not mean silence2 but1 ,i mean1 a slow and soft utterance2 a sort of sighing out of the words1 instead of speaking them2 a sort of letting the sounds fall out1 as if the party were sick at stomach4 ,the pronunciation of an industrious person is generally quick1 and distinct2 the voice1 if not strong1 firm at the least4 ,not masculine1 but as feminine as possible2 not a croak nor a bawl1 but a quick1 distinct1 and sound voice4 ,one writer insists that the motion of those little members of the body1 the teeth1 are very much in harmony with the operations of the mind2 and a very observing gentleman assures me that he can judge pretty accurately of the temper1 and indeed of the general character of a child1 by his manner of eating4 ,and ,i have no doubt of the fact4 ,nothing is more obvious than that the temper of the child who is so greedy as to swallow down his food habitually1 without masticating it1 must be very different from that of him who habitually eats slowly4 ,hunger1 ,i know1 will quicken the jaws in either case1 but ,i am supposing them on an equal footing in this respect4 ,another mark of industry is1 a quick step1 and a somewhat heavy tread1 showing that the foot comes down with a hearty good will4 ,if the body lean a little forward1 and the eyes keep steadily in the same direction1 while the feet are going1 so much the better1 for these discover earnestness to arrive at the intended point4 ,i do not like1 and ,i never liked1 your sauntering1 soft-stepping girls1 who move as if they were perfectly indifferent as to the result4 ,and1 as to the love part of the story1 who ever expects ardent and lasting affection from one of these sauntering girls1 will1 when too late1 find his mistake4 ,the character is much the same throughout2 and probably no man ever yet saw a sauntering girl1 who did not1 when married1 make an indifferent wife1 and a cold-hearted mother2 cared very little for1 either by husband or children2 and1 of course1 having no store of those blessings which are the natural resources to apply to in sickness and in old age4 #h4 ,,early ,,rising4 ,early rising is another mark of industry2 and though1 in the higher stations of life1 it may be of no importance in a mere pecuniary point of view1 it is1 even there1 of importance in other respects2 for it is rather difficult to keep love alive towards a woman who never sees the dew1 never beholds the rising sun1 and who constantly comes directly from a reeking bed to the breakfast table1 and there chews1 without appetite1 the choicest morsels of human food4 ,a man might1 perhaps1 endure this for a month or two1 without being disgusted2 but not much longer4 ,as to people in the middle rank of life1 where a living and a provision for children is to be sought by labor of some sort or other1 late rising in the wife is certain ruin2 and rarely will you find an early-rising wife1 who had been a late-rising girl4 ,if brought up to late rising1 she will like it2 it will be her habit2 she will1 when married1 never want excuses for indulging in the habit4 ,at first she will be indulged without bounds2 and to make a change afterwards will be difficult1 for it will be deemed a wrong done to her2 she will ascribe it to diminished affection4 ,a quarrel must ensue1 or1 the husband must submit to be ruined1 or1 at the very least1 to see half the fruit of his labor snored and lounged away4 ,and1 is this being unreasonably harsh or severe upon woman8 ,by no means4 ,it arises from an ardent desire to promote the happiness1 and to add to the natural1 legitimate1 and salutary influence of the female sex4 ,the tendency of this advice is to promote the preservation of their health2 to prolong the duration of their beauty2 to cause them to be loved to the last day of their lives2 and to give them1 during the whole of those lives1 that weight and consequence1 and respect1 of which laziness would render them wholly unworthy4 #i4 ,,frugality4 ,this means the contrary of extravagance4 ,it does not mean stinginess2 it does not mean pinching2 but it means an abstaining from all unnecessary expenditure1 and all unnecessary use of goods of any and of every sort4 ,it is a quality of great importance1 whether the rank in life be high or low4 ,some people are1 indeed1 so rich1 they have such an over-abundance of money and goods1 that how to get rid of them would1 to a spectator1 seem to be their only difficulty4 ,how many individuals of fine estates1 have been ruined and degraded by the extravagance of their wives6 ,more frequently by their own extravagance1 perhaps2 but1 in numerous instances1 by that of those whose duty it is to assist in upholding their stations by husbanding their fortunes4 ,if this be the case amongst the opulent1 who have estates to draw upon1 what must be the consequences of a want of frugality in the middle and lower ranks of life8 ,here it must be fatal1 and especially among that description of persons whose wives have1 in many cases1 the receiving as well as the expending of money4 ,in such a case1 there wants nothing but extravagance in the wife to make ruin as inevitable as the arrival of old age4 ,to obtain security against this is very difficult2 yet1 if the lover be not quite blind1 he may easily discover a propensity towards extravagance4 ,the object of his addresses will1 nine times out of ten1 never be the manager of a house2 but she must have her dress1 and other little matters under her control4 ,if she be costly in these2 if1 in these1 she step above her rank1 or even to the top of it2 if she purchase all she is able to purchase1 and prefer the showy to the useful1 the gay and the fragile to the less sightly and more durable1 he may be sure that the disposition will cling to her through life4 ,if he perceive in her a taste for costly food1 costly furniture1 costly amusements3 if he find her love of gratification to be bounded only by her want of means2 if he find her full of admiration of the trappings of the rich1 and of desire to be able to imitate them1 he may be pretty sure that she will not spare his purse1 when once she gets her hand into it2 and1 therefore1 if he can bid adieu to her charms1 the sooner he does it1 the better4 ,some of the indications of extravagance in a lady are ear-rings1 broaches1 bracelets1 buckles1 necklaces1 diamonds1 7real or mock17 and nearly all the ornaments which women put upon their persons4 ,these things may be more proper in palaces1 or in scenes resembling palaces2 but1 when they make their appearance amongst people in the middle rank of life1 where1 after all1 they only serve to show that poverty in the parties which they wish to disguise2 when the mean1 tawdry things make their appearance in this rank of life1 they are the sure indications of a disposition that will always be straining at what it can never attain4 ,to marry a girl of this disposition is really self-destruction4 ,you never can have either property or peace4 ,earn her a horse to ride1 she will want a gig3 earn the gig1 she will want a chariot3 get her that1 she will long for a coach and four3 and1 from stage to stage1 she will torment you to the end of her or your days2 for1 still there will be somebody with a finer equipage than you can give her2 and1 as long as this is the case1 you will never have rest4 ,reason would tell her1 that she could never be at the top2 that she must stop at some point short of that2 and that1 therefore1 all expenses in the rivalship are so much thrown away4 ,but1 reason and broaches and bracelets seldom go in company4 ,the girl who has not the sense to perceive that her person is disfigured and not beautified by parcels of brass and tin1 or even gold and silver1 as well to regret1 if she dare not oppose the tyranny of absurd fashions1 is not entitled to a full measure of the confidence of any individual4 #aj4 ,,personal ,,neatness4 ,there never yet was1 and there never will be sincere and ardent love1 of long duration1 where personal neatness is wholly neglected4 ,i do not say that there are not those who would live peaceably and even contentedly in these circumstances4 ,but what ,i contend for is this3 that there never can exist1 for any length of time1 ardent affection1 in any man towards a woman who neglects neatness1 either in her person1 or in her house affairs4 ,men may be careless as to their own person2 they may1 from the nature of their business1 or from their want of time to adhere to neatness in dress1 be slovenly in their own dress and habits2 but1 they do not relish this in their wives1 who must still have charms2 and charms and neglect of the person seldom go together4 ,i do not1 of course1 approve of it even in men4 ,we may1 indeed1 lay it down as a rule of almost universal application1 that supposing all other things to be equal1 he who is most guilty of personal neglect2 will be the most ignorant and the most vicious4 ,why there should be1 universally1 a connection between slovenliness1 ignorance1 and vice1 is a question ,i have no room in this work to discuss4 ,i am well acquainted with one whole family who neglect their persons from principle4 ,the gentleman1 who is a sort of new light in religious concerns1 will tell you that the true ,christian should 'slight the hovel1 as beneath his care4' ,but there is a want of intelligence1 and even common refinement in the family1 that certainly does not and cannot add much to their own happiness1 or recommend religion--aside from the fact that it greatly annoys their neighbors4 ,and though the head of the family observes many external duties with ,jewish strictness1 neither he nor any of its members are apt to bridle their tongues1 or remember that on ordinary as well as special occasions they are bound to 'do all to the glory of ,god4' ,as to the connection of mind with matter--,i mean the dependence of mind and soul on body1 they are wholly ignorant4 ,it is not dress that the husband wants to be perpetual3 it is not finery2 but cleanliness in every thing4 ,women generally dress enough1 especially when they go abroad4 ,this occasional cleanliness is not the thing that a husband wants3 he wants it always2 in-doors as well as out2 by night as well as by day2 on the floor as well as on the table2 and1 however he may complain about the trouble and the 'expense' of it1 he would complain more if it were neglected4 ,the indications of female neatness are1 first1 a clean skin4 ,the hands and face will usually be clean1 to be sure1 if there be soap and water within reach2 but if on observing other parts of the head besides the face1 you make discoveries indicating a different character1 the sooner you cease your visits the better4 ,i hope1 now1 that no young woman who may chance to see this book1 will be offended at this1 and think me too severe on her sex4 ,i am only telling that which all men think2 and1 it is a decided advantage to them to be fully informed of our thoughts on the subject4 ,if any one1 who reads this1 shall find1 upon self-examination1 that she is defective in this respect1 let her take the hint1 and correct the defect4 ,in the dress1 you can1 amongst rich people1 find little whereon to form a judgment as to cleanliness1 because they have not only the dress prepared for them1 but put upon them into the bargain4 ,but1 in the middle ranks of life1 the dress is a good criterion in two respects3 first1 as to its color2 for if the white be a sort of yellow1 cleanly hands would have been at work to prevent that4 ,a white-yellow cravat1 or shirt1 on a man1 speaks at once the character of his wife2 and1 you may be assured1 that she will not take with your dress pains which she has never taken with her own4 ,then1 the manner of putting on the dress1 is no bad foundation for judging4 ,if this be careless1 and slovenly1 if it do not fit properly1--no matter for its mean quality2 mean as it may be1 it may be neatly and trimly put on--if it be slovenly put on1 ,i say1 take care of yourself2 for1 you will soon find to your cost1 that a sloven in one thing1 is a sloven in all things4 ,the plainer people1 judge greatly from the state of the covering of the ankles2 and1 if that be not clean and tight1 they conclude that the rest is not as it ought to be4 ,look at the shoes6 ,if they be trodden on one side1 loose on the foot1 or run down at the heel1 it is a very bad sign2 and as to going slipshod1 though at coming down in the morning1 and even before daylight1 make up your mind to a rope1 rather than live with a slipshod woman4 ,how much do women lose by inattention to these matters6 ,men1 in general1 say nothing about it to their wives1 but they think about it2 they envy their more lucky neighbors1 and in numerous cases1 consequences the most serious arise from this apparently trifling cause4 ,beauty is valuable2 it is one of the ties1 and a strong one too2 but it cannot last to old age2 whereas the charm of cleanliness never ends but with life itself4 ,it has been said that the sweetest flowers1 when they really become putrid1 are the most offensive4 ,so the most beautiful woman1 if found with an uncleansed skin1 is1 in my estimation1 the most disagreeable4 #aa4 ,a ,,good ,,temper4 ,this is a very difficult thing to ascertain beforehand4 ,smiles are cheap2 they are easily put on for the occasion2 and1 besides1 the frowns are1 according to the lover's whim1 interpreted into the contrary4 ,by 'good temper1' ,i do not mean an easy temper1 a serenity which nothing disturbs2 for that is a mark of laziness4 ,sullenness1 if you be not too blind to perceive it1 is a temper to be avoided by all means4 ,a sullen man is bad enough2 what1 then1 must be a sullen woman1 and that woman a wife2 a constant inmate1 a companion day and night6 ,only think of the delight of setting at the same table1 and occupying the same chamber1 for a week1 without exchanging a word all the while6 ,very bad to be scolding for such a length of time2 but this is far better than 'the sulks4' ,but if you have your eyes1 and look sharp1 you will discover symptoms of this1 if it unhappily exist4 ,she will1 at some time or other1 show it towards some one or other of the family2 or1 perhaps1 towards yourself2 and you may be quite sure that1 in this respect1 marriage will not mend her4 ,sullenness arises from capricious displeasure not founded in reason4 ,the party takes offence unjustifiably2 is unable to frame a complaint1 and therefore expresses displeasure by silence4 ,the remedy for it is1 to suffer it to take its full swing1 but it is better not to have the disease in your house2 and to be married to it1 is little short of madness4 ,querulousness is a great fault4 ,no man1 and1 especially1 no woman1 likes to hear a continual plaintiveness4 ,that she complain1 and roundly complain1 of your want of punctuality1 of your coolness1 of your neglect1 of your liking the company of others3 these are all very well1 more especially as they are frequently but too just4 ,but an everlasting complaining1 without rhyme or reason1 is a bad sign4 ,it shows want of patience1 and1 indeed1 want of sense4 ,but the contrary of this1 a cold indifference1 is still worse4 ',when will you come again8 ,you can never find time to come here4 ,you like any company better than mine4' ,these1 when groundless1 are very teasing1 and demonstrate a disposition too full of anxiousness2 but1 from a girl who always receives you with the same civil smile1 lets you1 at your own good pleasure1 depart with the same2 and who1 when you take her by the hand1 holds her cold fingers as straight as sticks1 ,i should say1 in mercy1 preserve me6 ,pertinacity is a very bad thing in anybody1 and especially in a young woman2 and it is sure to increase in force with the age of the party4 ,to have the last word1 is a poor triumph2 but with some people it is a species of disease of the mind4 ,in a wife it must be extremely troublesome2 and1 if you find an ounce of it in the maid1 it will become a pound in the wife4 ,a fierce disputer is a most disagreeable companion2 and where young women thrust their say into conversations carried on by older persons1 give their opinions in a positive manner1 and court a contest of the tongue1 those must be very bold men who will encounter them as wives4 ,still1 of all the faults as to temper1 your melancholy ladies have the worst1 unless you have the same mental disease yourself4 ,many wives are1 at times1 misery-makers2 but these carry it on as a regular trade4 ,they are always unhappy about something1 either past1 present1 or to come4 ,both arms full of children is a pretty efficient remedy in most cases2 but1 if these ingredients be wanting1 a little want1 a little real trouble1 a little genuine affliction1 often will effect a cure4 #ab4 ,,accomplishments4 ,by accomplishments1 ,i mean those things1 which are usually comprehended in what is termed a useful and polite education4 ,now it is not unlikely that the fact of my adverting to this subject so late1 may lead to the opinion that ,i do not set a proper estimate on this female qualification4 ,but it is not so4 ,probably few set too high an estimate upon it4 ,its absolute importance has1 ,i am confident1 been seldom overrated4 ,it is true ,i do not like a bookish woman better than a bookish man2 especially a great devourer of that most contemptible species of books with whose burden the press daily groans3 ,i mean novels4 ,but mental cultivation1 and even what is called polite learning1 along with the foregoing qualifications1 are a most valuable acquisition1 and make every female1 as well as all her associates1 doubly happy4 ,it is only when books1 and music1 and a taste for the fine arts are substituted for other and more important things1 that they should be allowed to change love or respect to disgust4 ,it sometimes happens1 ,i know1 that two persons are1 in this respect1 pretty equally yoked4 ,but what of that8 ,it only makes each party twofold more the child of misfortune than before4 ,i have known a couple of intelligent persons who would sit with their 'feet in the ashes1' as it were1 all day1 to read some new and bewitching book1 forgetting every want of the body2 perhaps even forgetting that they had bodies4 ,were they therefore happy1 or likely to be so8 ,drawing1 music1 embroidery1 7and ,i might mention half a dozen other things of the same class7 where they do not exclude the more useful and solid matters1 may justly be regarded as appropriate branches of female education2 and in some circumstances and conditions of life1 indispensable4 ,music1--vocal and instrumental--and drawing1 to a certain extent1 seem to me desirable in all4 ,as for dancing1 ,i do not feel quite competent to decide4 ,as the world is1 however1 ,i am almost disposed to reject it altogether4 ,at any rate1 if a young lady is accomplished in every other respect1 you need not seriously regret that she has not attended to dancing1 especially as it is conducted in most of our schools4 ,,chapter ,,vii4 ,criminal ,behavior4 ,,section ,i4 ,inconstancy and ,seduction4 ,in nineteen cases out of twenty1 of illicit conduct1 there is perhaps1 no seduction at all2 the passion1 the absence of virtue1 and the crime1 being all mutual4 ,but there are cases of a very different description4 ,where a young man goes coolly and deliberately to work1 first to gain and rivet the affections of a young lady1 then to take advantage of those affections to accomplish that which he knows must be her ruin1 and plunge her into misery for life2--when a young man does this1 ,i say he must be either a selfish and unfeeling brute1 unworthy of the name of man1 or he must have a heart little inferior1 in point of obduracy1 to that of the murderer4 ,let young women1 however1 be aware2 let them be well aware1 that few1 indeed1 are the cases in which this apology can possibly avail them4 ,their character is not solely theirs1 but belongs1 in part1 to their family and kindred4 ,they may1 in the case contemplated1 be objects of compassion with the world2 but what contrition1 what repentance1 what remorse1 what that even the tenderest benevolence can suggest1 is to heal the wounded hearts of humbled1 disgraced1 but still affectionate parents1 brethren1 and sisters8 ,in the progress of an intimate acquaintance1 should it be discovered that there are certain traits of character in one of the parties1 which both are fully convinced will be a source of unhappiness1 through life1 there may be no special impropriety in separating4 ,and yet even then ,i would say1 avoid haste4 ,better consider for an hour than repent for a year1 or for life4 ,but let it be remembered1 that before measures of this kind are even hinted at1 there must be a full conviction of their necessity1 and the mutual and hearty concurrence of both parties4 ,any steps of this kind1 the reasons for which are not fully understood on both sides1 and mutually satisfactory1 as well as easily explicable to those friends who have a right to inquire on the subject1 are criminal2--nay more2 they are brutal4 ,i have alluded to indirect promises of marriage1 because ,i conceive that the frequent opinion among young men that nothing is binding but a direct promise1 in so many words1 is not only erroneous1 but highly dishonorable to those who hold it4 ,the strongest pledges are frequently given without the interchange of words4 ,actions speak louder than words2 and there is an attachment sometimes formed1 and a confidence reposed1 which would be1 in effect1 weakened by formalities4 ,the man who would break a silent engagement1 merely because it is a silent one1 especially when he has taken a course of conduct which he knew would be likely to result in such engagement1 and which perhaps he even designed1 is deserving of the public contempt4 ,he is even a monster unfit to live in decent society4 ,but there are such monsters on the earth's surface4 ,there are individuals to be found1 who boast of their inhuman depredations on those whom it ought to be their highest happiness to protect and aid1 rather than injure4 ,they can witness1 almost without emotion1 the heavings of a bosom rent with pangs which themselves have inflicted4 ,they can behold their unoffending victim1 as unmoved as one who views a philosophical experiment2--not expiring1 it is true1 but despoiled of what is vastly dearer to her than life--her reputation4 ,they can witness all this1 ,i say1 without emotion1 and without a single compunction of conscience4 ,and yet they go on1 sometimes with apparent prosperity and inward peace4 ,at any rate1 they live4 ,no lightning blasts them2 no volcano pours over them its floods of lava2 no earthquake engulfs them4 ,they are permitted to fill up the measure of their wickedness4 ,perhaps they riot in ease1 and become bloated with luxury4 ,but let this description of beings--men ,i am almost afraid to call them--remember that punishment1 though long deferred1 cannot be always evaded4 ,a day of retribution must and will arrive4 ,for though they may not be visited by what a portion of the community call special 'judgments1' yet their punishment is not the less certain4 ,the wretch who can commit the crime to which ,i have referred1 against a fellow being1 and sport with those promises1 which1 whether direct or indirect1 are of all things earthly among the most sacred1 will not1 unless he repents1 rest here4 ,he will go on from step to step in wickedness4 ,he will harden himself against every sensibility to the woes of others1 till he becomes a fiend accursed1 and whether on this side of the grave1 or the other1 cannot but be completely miserable4 ,a single sin may not always break in upon habits of virtue so as to ruin an individual at once2 but the vices go in gangs1 or companies4 ,one admitted and indulged1 and the whole gang soon follow4 ,and misery must follow sin1 at a distance more or less near1 as inevitably as a stone falls to the ground1 or the needle points to the pole4 ,some young men reason thus with themselves4 ,if doubts about the future have already risen--if my affections already begin to waver at times--what is not to be expected after marriage8 ,and is it not better to separate1 even without a mutual concurrence1 than to make others1 perhaps many others1 unhappy for life8 ,in reply1 ,i would observe1 in the first place1 that though this is the usual reason which is assigned in such cases1 it is not generally the true one4 ,the fact is1 the imagination is suffered to wander where it ought not2 and the affections are not guarded and restrained1 and confined to their proper object4 ,and if there be a diminution of attachment1 it is not owing to any change in others1 but in ourselves4 ,if our affection has become less ardent1 let us look within1 for the cause4 ,shall others suffer for our own fault8 ,but1 secondly1 we may do much to control the affections1 even after they have begun to wander4 ,we still seek the happiness of the object of our choice1 more1 perhaps1 than that of any other individual4 ,then let us make it our constant study to promote it4 ,it is a law of our natures1 as irrevocable as that of the attraction of gravitation1 that doing good to others produces love to them4 ,and for myself ,i do not believe the affections of a young man can diminish towards one whose happiness he is constantly studying to promote by every means in his power1 admitting there is no obvious change in her character4 ,so that no young person of principle ought ever to anticipate any such result4 ,nor has a man any right to sport with the affections of a young woman1 in any way whatever4 ,vanity is generally the tempter in this case2 a desire to be regarded as being admired by the women2 a very despicable species of vanity1 but frequently greatly mischievous1 notwithstanding4 ,you do not1 indeed1 actually1 in so many words1 promise to marry2 but the general tenor of your language and deportment has that meaning2 you know that your meaning is so understood2 and if you have not such meaning2 if you be fixed by some previous engagement with1 or greater liking for another2 if you know you are here sowing the seeds of disappointment2 and if you persevere1 in spite of the admonitions of conscience1 you are guilty of deliberate deception1 injustice and cruelty4 ,you make to ,god an ungrateful return for those endowments which have enabled you to achieve this inglorious and unmanly triumph2 and if1 as is frequently the case1 you glory in such triumph1 you may have person1 riches1 talents to excite envy2 but every just and humane man will abhor your heart4 ,the most direct injury against the spiritual nature of a fellow being is1 by leading him into vice4 ,i have heard one young man1 who was entrusted six days in the week to form the immortal minds and hearts of a score or two of his fellow beings1 deliberately boast of the number of the other sex he had misled4 ,what can be more base8 ,and must not a terrible retribution await such ,heaven daring miscreants8 ,whether they accomplish their purposes by solicitation1 by imposing on the judgment1 or by powerful compulsion1 the wrong is the same1 or at least of the same nature2 and nothing but timely and hearty repentance can save a wretch of this description from punishment1 either here or hereafter4 ',some tempers1' says ,burgh1 7for nothing can be more in point than his own words7 'are so impotently ductile1 that they can refuse nothing to repeated solicitation4 ,whoever takes the advantage of such persons is guilty of the lowest baseness4 ,yet nothing is more common than for the debauched part of our sex to show their heroism by a poor triumph1 over weak1 easy1 thoughtless woman6--,nothing is more frequent than to hear them boast of the ruin of that virtue1 of which they ought to have been the defenders4 ,poor fool6 she loved me1 and therefore could refuse me nothing4--,base coward6 ,dost thou boast of thy conquest over one1 who1 by thy own confession1 was disabled for resistance1--disabled by her affection for thy worthless self6 ,does affection deserve such a return ,is superior understanding1 or rather deeper craft1 to be used against thoughtless simplicity1 and its shameful success to be boasted of8 ,dost thou pride thyself that thou hast had art enough to decoy the harmless lamb to thy hand1 that thou mightest shed its blood8' ,and yet there are such monsters as ,burgh alludes to4 ,there are just such beings scattered up and down even the fairest portions of the world we live in1 to mar its beauty4 ,we may hope1 for the honor of human nature1 they are few4 ,he who can bring himself to believe their number to be as great as one in a thousand1 may well be disposed to blush ',and hang his head1 to own himself a man4' ,i have sometimes wished these beings--men they are not--would reflect1 if it were but for one short moment4 ,they will not deny the excellency of the golden rule1 of doing to others as they wish others to do by themselves4 ,i say they will not deny it1 in theory2 why then should they despise it in practice8 ,let them think a moment4 ,let them imagine themselves in the place of the injured party4 ,could this point be gained2 could they be induced to reflect long enough to see the enormity of their guilt as it really is1 or as the ,father in heaven may be supposed to see it1 there might be hope in their case4 ,or if they find it difficult to view themselves as the injured1 let them suppose1 rather1 a sister or a daughter4 ,what seducer is so lost to all natural affection as not to have his whole soul revolt at the bare thought of having a beloved daughter experience the treatment which he has inflicted8 ,yet the being whom he has ruined had brothers or parents2 and those brothers had a sister2 and those parents a daughter6 ,,section ,,ii4 ,licentiousness4 ,i wish it were in my power to finish my remarks in this place1 without feeling that ,i had made an important omission4 ,but such is the tendency of human nature1 especially in the case of the young and ardent1 to turn the most valuable blessings conferred on man into curses1--and poison1 at their very sources1 the purest streams of human felicity1--that it will be necessary to advert briefly but plainly to some of the most frequent forms of youthful irregularity4 ,large cities and thinly settled places are the extremes of social life4 ,here1 of course1 vice will be found in its worst forms4 ,it is more difficult to say which extreme is worst1 among an equal number of individuals2 but probably the city2 for in the country1 vice is oftener solitary1 and less frequently social2 while in the city it is not only social but also solitary4 ,a well informed gentleman from ,new ,orleans1 of whose own virtue by the way1 ,i have not the highest confidence1 expressed1 lately the strongest apprehension that the whole race of young men in our cities1 of the present generation1 will be ruined4 ,others have assured me that in the more northern cities1 the prospect is little1 if any1 more favorable4 ,it is to be regretted that legislators have not found out the means of abolishing those haunts in cities which might be appropriately termed schools of licentiousness1 and thus diminishing an aggregate of temptation already sufficiently large4 ,but the vices1 like their votaries1 go in companies4 ,until1 therefore1 the various haunts of intemperance in eating and drinking1 and of gambling and stage-playing1 can be broken up1 it may be considered vain to hope for the disappearance of those sties of pollution which are their almost inevitable results4 ,we might as well think of drying up the channel of a mighty river1 while the fountains which feed it continue to flow as usual4 ,there is now in ,pennsylvania1--it seems unnecessary to name the place--a man thirty-five years old1 with all the infirmities of 'three score and ten4' ,yet his premature old age1 his bending and tottering form1 wrinkled face1 and hoary head1 might be traced to solitary and social licentiousness4 ,this man is not alone4 ,there are thousands in every city who are going the same road2 some with slow and cautious steps1 others with a fearful rapidity4 ,thousands of youth on whom high expectations have been placed1 are already on the highway that will probably lead down to disease and premature death4 ,could the multitude of once active1 sprightly1 and promising young men1 whose souls detested open vice1 and who1 without dreaming of danger1 only found their way occasionally to a lottery office1 and still more rarely to the theatre or the gambling house1 until led on step by step they ventured down those avenues which lead to the chambers of death1 from which few ever return1 and none uninjured2--could the multitudes of such beings1 which in the ,united ,states alone1 7though admitted to be the paradise of the world17 have gone down to infamy through licentiousness1 be presented to our view1 at once1 how would it strike us with horror6 ,their very numbers would astonish us1 but how much more their appearance6 ,i am supposing them to appear as they went to the graves1 in their bloated and disfigured faces1 their emaciated and tottering frames1 bending at thirty years of age under the appearance of three or four score2 diseased externally and internally2 and positively disgusting1--not only to the eye1 but to some of the other senses4 ,one such monster is enough to fill the soul of those who are but moderately virtuous with horror2 what then would be the effect of beholding thousands8 ,in view of such a scene1 is there a young man in the world1 who would not form the strongest resolution not to enter upon a road which ends in wo so remediless8 ,but it should be remembered that these thousands were once the friends--the children1 the brothers1--yes1 sometimes the nearer relatives of other thousands4 ,they had parents1 sisters1 brothers2 sometimes 7would it were not true7 wives and infants4 ,suppose the young man whom temptation solicits1 were not only to behold the wretched thousands already mentioned1 but the many more thousands of dear relatives mourning their loss2--not by death1 for that were tolerable--but by an everlasting destruction from the presence of all purity or excellence4 ,would he not shrink back from the door which he was about to enter1 ashamed and aghast1 and resolve in the strength of his ,creator1 never more to indulge a thought of a crime so disastrous in its consequences8 ,and let every one remember that the army of ruined immortals which have been here presented to the imagination1 is by no means a mere fancy sketch4 ,there is a day to come which will disclose a scene of which ,i have given but a faint picture4 ,for though the thousands who have thus destroyed their own bodies and souls1 with their agonized friends and relatives1 are scattered among several millions of their fellow citizens1 and1 for a time1 not a few of them elude the public gaze1 yet their existence is much a reality1 as if they were assembled in one place4 ',all this1' it may be said1 ',i have often heard1 and it may be true4 ,but it does not apply to me4 ,i am in no danger4 ,you speak of a path1 ,i have never entered2 or if ,i have ever done so1 ,i have no idea of returning to it1 habitually4 ,i know my own strength2 how far to go1 and when and where to stop4' ,but is there one of all the miserable1 in the future world1 who did not once think the same8 ,is there one among the thousands who have thus ruined themselves and those who had been as dear to them as themselves1 that did not once feel a proud consciousness that he 'knew his own strength8' ,yet now where is he8 ,beware1 then4 ,take not the first step4 ,nay1 indulge not for an instant1 the thought of a first step4 ,here you are safe4 ,every where else is danger4 ,take one step1 and the next is more easy2 the temptation harder to resist4 ,do you call this preaching8 ,be it so then4 ,i feel1 and deeply too1 that your immortal minds1 those gems which were created to sparkle and shine in the firmament of heaven1 are in danger of having their lustre for ever tarnished1 and their brightness everlastingly hid beneath a thicker darkness than that which once covered the land of ,egypt4 ,c4 ,s4 was educated by ,new ,england parents1 in one of the most flourishing of ,new ,england villages4 ,he was all that anxious friends could hope or desire2 all that a happy community could love and esteem4 ,as he rose to manhood he evinced a full share of ',yankee' activity and enterprise4 ,some of the youth in the neighborhood were traders to the southern ,states1 and ,c4 concluded to try his fortune among the rest4 ,he was furnished with two excellent horses and a wagon1 and every thing necessary to ensure success4 ,his theatre of action was the low country of ,virginia and ,north ,carolina1 and his head-quarters1 ,n----1 whither he used to return after an excursion of a month or six week1 to spend a few days in that dissipated village4 ,young ,c4 gradually yielded to the temptations which the place afforded4 ,first1 he engaged in occasional 'drinking bouts1' next in gaming2 lastly1 he frequented a house of ill fame4 ,this was about the year #ahai4 ,at the end of the year #ahbj1 ,i saw him1 but--now changed6 ,the eye that once beamed with health1 and vigor1 and cheerfulness1 was now dimmed and flattened4 ,the countenance which once shone with love and good-will to man1 was pale and suspicious1 or occasionally suffused with stagnant1 and sickly1 and crimson streams4 ,the teeth1 which were once as white as ivory1 were now blackened by the use of poisonous medicine1 given to counteract a still more poisonous and loathsome disease4 ,the frame1 which had once been as erect as the stately cedar of ,lebanon1 was1 at the early age of thirty1 beginning to bend as with years4 ,the voice1 which once spoke forth the sentiments of a soul of comparative purity1 now not unfrequently gave vent to the licentious song1 the impure jest1 and the most shocking oaths1 and heaven-daring impiety and blasphemy4 ,the hands which were once like the spirit within1 were now not unfrequently joined in the dance1 with the vilest of the vile6 ,i looked1 too1 at his external circumstances ,once he had friends whom he loved to see1 and from whom he was glad to hear4 ,now it was a matter of indifference both to him and them whether they ever saw each other4 ,the hopes of parents1 and especially of 'her that bare him' were laid in the dust2 and to the neighborhood of which he had once been the pride and the ornament1 he was fast becoming as if he had never been4 ,he had travelled first with two horses1 next with one2 afterward on foot with a choice assortment of jewelry and other pedlar's wares2 now his assortment was reduced to a mere handful4 ,he could purchase to the value of a few dollars1 take a short excursion1 earn a small sum1 and return--not to a respectable house1 as once1--but to the lowest of resorts1 to expend it4 ,here1 in #ahba1 ,i last saw him2 a fair candidate for the worst contagious diseases which occasionally infest that region1 and a pretty sure victim to the first severe attack4 ,or if he should even escape these1 with the certainty before him of a very short existence1 at best4 ,this is substantially the history of many a young man whose soul was once as spotless as that of ,c4 ,s4 ,would that young men knew their strength1 and their dignity2 and would put forth but half the energy that ,god has given them4 ,then they would never approach the confines of those regions of dissipation1 for when they have once entered them1 the soul and the body are often ruined forever4 ,there are in every city hundreds of young men--,i regret to say it1--who should heed this warning voice4 ,now they are happily situated1 beloved1 respected4 ,they are engaged in useful and respectable avocations1 and looking forward to brighter and better scenes4 ,let them beware lest there should be causes in operation1 calculated to sap the foundations of the castle which fancy's eye has builded1 7and which might even be realized72 and lest their morning sun1 which is now going forth in splendor1 be not shrouded in darkness ere it has yet attained its meridian height4 ,every city affords places and means of amusement1 at once rational1 satisfying1 and improving4 ,such are collections of curiosities1 natural and artificial1 lectures on science1 debating clubs1 lyceums1 c4 ,then the libraries which abound1 afford a source of never ending amusement and instruction4 ,let these suffice4 ,at least1 'touch not1 handle not' that which an accumulated and often sorrowful experience has shown to be accursed4 ,neither resort to solitary vice4 ,if this practice should not injure your system immediately1 it will in the end4 ,i am sorry to be obliged to advert to this subject2 but ,i know there is occasion4 ,youth1 especially those who lead a confined life1 seek occasional excitement4 ,such sometimes resort to this lowest1--,i may say most destructive of practices4 ,such is the constitution of things1 as the ,author of ,nature has established it1 that if every other vicious act were to escape its merited punishment in this world1 the one in question could not4 ,whatever its votaries may think1 it never fails1 in a single instance1 to injure them1 personally2 and consequently their posterity1 should any succeed them4 ,it is not indeed true that the foregoing vices do of themselves1 produce all this mischief directly2 but as ,dr4 ,paley has well said1 criminal intercourse 'corrupts and depraves the mind more than any single vice whatsoever4' ,it gradually benumbs the conscience1 and leads on1 step by step1 to those blacker vices at which the youth would once have shuddered4 ,but debasing as this vice is1 it is scarcely more so than solitary gratification4 ,the former is not always at hand2 is attended1 it may be1 with expense2 and with more or less danger of exposure4 ,but the latter is practicable whenever temptation or rather imagination solicits1 and appears to the morbid eye of sense1 to be attended with no hazard4 ,alas6 what a sad mistake is made here6 ,it is a fact well established by medical men1 that every error on this point is injurious2 and that the constitution is often more surely or more effectually impaired by causes which do not appear to injure it in the least1 than by occasional and heavier shocks1 which rouse it to a reaction4 ,the one case may be compared to daily tippling1 the other to those periodical drunken frolics1 which1 having an interval of weeks or months between them1 give the system time to recover1 in part1 7but in part only7 from the violence it had sustained4 ,i wish to put the younger portion of my readers upon their guard against a set of wretches who take pains to initiate youth1 while yet almost children1 into the practice of the vice to which ,i have here adverted4 ,domestics--where the young are too familiar with them--have been known to be thus ungrateful to their employers4 ,there are1 however1 people of several classes1 who do not hesitate to mislead1 in this manner4 ,but the misfortune is1 that this book will not be apt to fall into the hands of those to whom these remarks apply1 till the ruinous habit is already formed4 ,and then it is that counsel sometimes comes too late4 ,should these pages meet the eye of any who have been misled1 let them remember that they have begun a career which multitudes repent bitterly2 and from which few are apt to return4 ,but there have been instances of reform2 therefore none ought to despair4 ',what man has done1 man may do4' ,they should first set before their minds the nature of the practice1 and the evils to which it exposes4 ,but here comes the difficulty4 ,what are its legitimate evils8 ,they know indeed that the written laws of ,god condemn it2 but the punishment which those laws threaten1 appears to be remote and uncertain4 ,or if not1 they are apt to regard it as the punishment of excess1 merely4 ,they1 prudent souls1 would not1 for the world1 plunge into excess4 ,besides1 'they injure none but themselves1' they tell us4 ,would it were true that they injured none but themselves6 ,would there were no generations yet unborn to suffer by inheriting feeble constitutions1 or actual disease1 from their progenitors6 ,suppose1 however1 they really injured nobody but themselves4 ,have they a right to do even this8 ,they will not maintain1 for one moment1 that they have a right to take away their own life4 ,by what right1 then1 do they allow themselves to shorten it1 or diminish its happiness while it lasts8 ,here the question recurs again3 ,does solitary gratification actually shorten life1 or diminish its happiness8 ,the very fact that the laws of ,god forbid it1 is an affirmative answer to this question4 ,for nothing is more obvious than that all other vices which that law condemns1 stand in the way of our present happiness1 as well as the happiness of futurity4 ,is this alone an exception to the general rule8 ,but ,i need not make my appeal to this kind of authority4 ,you rely on human testimony4 ,you believe a thousand things which yourselves never saw or heard4 ,why do you believe them1 except upon testimony--,i mean given either verbally1 or1 what is the same thing1 in books8 ,now if the accumulated testimony of medical writers from the days of ,galen1 and ,celsus1 and ,hippocrates1 to the present hour1 could have any weight with you1 it would settle the point at once4 ,i have collected1 briefly1 the results of medical testimony on this subject1 in the next chapter2 but if you will take my statements for the present1 ,i will assure you that ,i have before me documents enough to fill half a volume like this1 from those who have studied deeply these subjects1 whose united language is1 that the practice in question1 indulged in any degree1 is destructive to body and mind2 and that although1 in vigorous young men1 no striking evil may for some time appear1 yet the punishment can no more be evaded1 except by early death1 than the motion of the earth can be hindered4 ,and all this1 too1 without taking into consideration the terrors of a judgment to come4 ,but why1 then1 some may ask1 are animal propensities given us1 if they are not to be indulged8 ,the appropriate reply is1 they are to be indulged2 but it is only in accordance with the laws of ,god2 never otherwise4 ,and the wisdom of these laws1 did they not rest on other and better proof1 is amply confirmed by that great body of medical experience already mentioned4 ,god has delegated to man1 a sort of subcreative power to perpetuate his own race4 ,such a wonderful work required a wonderful apparatus4 ,and such is furnished4 ,the texture of the organs for this purpose is of the most tender and delicate kind1 scarcely equalled by that of the eye1 and quite as readily injured2 and this fact ought to be known1 and considered4 ,but instead of leaving to human choice or caprice the execution of the power thus delegated1 the great ,creator has made it a matter of duty2 and has connected with the lawful discharge of that duty1 as with all others1 enjoyment4 ,but when this enjoyment is sought in any way1 not in accordance with the laws prescribed by reason and revelation1 we diminish 7whatever giddy youth may suppose17 the sum total of our own happiness4 ,now this is not the cold speculation of age1 or monkish austerity4 ,it is sober matter of fact4 ,it is said that young men are sometimes in circumstances which forbid their conforming to these laws1 were they disposed to do so4 ,not so often however1 as is commonly supposed4 ,marriage is not such a mountain of difficulty as many imagine4 ,this ,i have already attempted to show4 ,one circumstance to be considered1 in connection with this subject1 is1 that in any society1 the more there is of criminal indulgence1 whether secret or social1 the more strongly are excuses for neglecting matrimony urged4 ,every step which a young man takes in forbidden paths1 affords him a plea in behalf of the next4 ,the farther he goes1 the less the probability of his returning to the ways of purity1 or entering those of domestic felicity4 ,people in such places as ,london and ,paris1 marry much later in life1 upon the average1 than in country places4 ,and is not the cause obvious8 ,and is not the same cause beginning to produce similar effects in our own ,american cities8 ,but suppose celibacy in some cases1 to be unavoidable1 can a life of continence1 in the fullest sense of the term1 be favorable to health8 ,this question is answered by those to whose writings ,i have already referred1 in the affirmative4 ,but it is also answered by facts1 though from the nature of the case these facts are not always easy of access4 ,we have good reason to believe that ,sir ,isaac ,newton and ,dr4 ,fothergill1 never for once in their lives deviated from the strict laws of rectitude on this point4 ,and we have no evidence that they were sufferers for their rigid course of virtue4 ,the former certainly enjoyed a measure of health and reached an age1 to which few1 in any circumstances1 attain2 and the latter led an active and useful life to nearly three-score and ten4 ,there are living examples of the same purity of character1 but they cannot1 of course1 be mentioned in this work4 ,several erroneous views in regard to the animal economy which have led to the very general opinion that a life of celibacy--strictly so1 ,i mean--cannot be a life of health1 might here be exposed1 did either the limits or the nature of the work permit4 ,it is not that a state of celibacy--entirely so1 ,i always mean--is positively injurious2 but that a state of matrimony is more useful2 and1 as a general rule1 attended with more happiness4 ,it is most ardently to be hoped1 that the day is not far distant when every young man will study the laws and functions of the human frame for himself4 ,this would do more towards promoting individual purity and public happiness1 than all the reasoning in the world can accomplish without it4 ,men1 old or young1 must see for themselves how 'fearfully' as well as 'wonderfully' they are made1 before they can have a thorough and abiding conviction of the nature of disobedience1 or of the penalties that attend1 as well as follow it4 ,and in proportion1 as the subject is studied and understood1 may we not hope celibacy will become less frequent1 and marriage--honorable1 and1 if you please1 early marriage--be more highly estimated8 ,this work is not addressed to parents2 but should it be read by any who have sons1 at an age1 and in circumstances1 which expose them to temptation1 and in a way which will be very apt to secure their fall1 let them beware4#ad ,still1 the matter must be finally decided by the young themselves4 ,they1 in short1 must determine the question whether they will rise in the scale of being1 through every period of their existence1 or sink lower and lower in the depths of degradation and wo4 ,they must be1 after all1 the arbiters of their own fate4 ,no influences1 human or divine1 will ever force them to happiness4 ,the remainder of this section will be devoted to remarks on the causes which operate to form licentious feelings and habits in the young4 ,my limits1 however1 will permit me to do little more than mention them4 ,and if some of them might be addressed with more force to parents than to young men1 let it be remembered that the young may be parents1 and if they cannot recall the past1 and correct the errors in their own education1 they can1 at least1 hope to prevent the same errors in the education of others4 #ad ,parents who inform their children on this subject1 generally begin too late4 ,familiar conversational explanation1 begun as soon as there is reason to apprehend danger1 and judiciously pursued1 is perhaps the most successful method of preventing evil4 #a4 ,,false ,,delicacy4 ,too much of real delicacy can never be inculcated2 but in our early management1 we seem to implant the false1 instead of the true4 ,the language we use1 in answering the curious questions of children1 often leads to erroneous associations of ideas2 and it is much better to be silent4 ,by the falsehoods which we think it necessary to tell1 we often excite still greater curiosity1 instead of satisfying that which already exists4 ,i will not undertake to decide what ought to be done2 but silence1 ,i am certain1 would be far better than falsehood4 ,there is another error1 which is laid deeper still1 because it begins earlier4 ,i refer to the half ,mohammedan practice of separating the two sexes at school4 ,this practice1 ,i am aware has strong advocates2 but it seems to me they cannot have watched closely the early operations of their own minds1 and observed how curiosity was awakened1 and wanton imaginations fostered by distance1 and apparent and needless reserve4 #b4 ,,licentious ,,books1 ,,pictures1 ,c4 ,this unnatural reserve1 and the still more unnatural falsehoods already mentioned1 prepare the youthful mind for the reception of any thing which has the semblance of information on the points to which curiosity is directed4 ,and now comes the danger4 ,the world abounds in impure publications1 which almost all children1 7boys especially17 at sometime or other1 contrive to get hold of1 in spite of parental vigilance4 ,if these books contained truth1 and nothing but truth1 their clandestine circulation would do less mischief4 ,but they generally impart very little information which is really valuable2 on the contrary they contain much falsehood2 especially when they profess to instruct on certain important subjects4 ,let me repeat it then1 they cannot be relied on2 and in the language of another book1 on another subject2 ',he that trusteth' to them1 'is a fool4' ,the same remarks might be extended1 and with even more justice1 to licentious paintings and engravings1 which circulate in various ways4 ,and ,i am sorry to include in this charge not a few which are publicly exhibited for sale1 in the windows of our shops4 ,you may sometimes find obscene pictures under cover of a watch-case or snuff box4 ,in short1 there would often seem to be a general combination of human and infernal efforts to render the juvenile thoughts and affections impure2 and not a few parents themselves enter into the horrible league4 ,on this subject ,dr4 ,dwight remarks2 ',the numbers of the poet1 the delightful melody of song1 the fascination of the chisel1 and the spell of the pencil1 have been all volunteered in the service of ,satan for the moral destruction of unhappy man4 ,to finish this work of malignity the stage has lent all its splendid apparatus of mischief2 the shop has been converted into a show-box of temptations2 and its owner into a pander of iniquity4' ,and in another place2 ',genius1 in every age1 and in every country1 has1 to a great extent1 prostituted its elevated powers for the deplorable purpose of seducing thoughtless minds to this sin4' ,are these remarks too sweeping8 ,in my own opinion1 not at all4 ,let him1 who doubts1 take a careful survey of the whole of this dangerous ground4 #c4 ,,obscene ,,and ,,improper ,,songs4 ,the prostitution of the melody of song1 mentioned by ,dr4 ,dwight1 reminds me of another serious evil4 ,many persons1 and even not a few intelligent parents1 seem to think that a loose or immoral song cannot much injure their children1 especially if they express their disapprobation of it afterwards4 ,as if the language of the tongue could give the lie to the language of the heart1 already written1 and often deeply1 in the eye and countenance4 ,for it is notorious that a considerable proportion of parents tolerate songs containing very improper sentiments1 and hear them with obvious interest1 how much soever they may wish their children to have a better and purer taste4 ,the common 'love songs' are little better than those already mentioned4 ,it is painful to think what errors on this subject are sometimes tolerated even by decent society4 ,i knew a schoolmaster who did not hesitate to join occasional parties1 7embracing1 among others1 professedly ,christian parents17 for the purpose of spending his long winter evenings1 in hearing songs from a very immoral individual1 not a few of which were adapted to the most corrupt taste1 and unfit to be heard in good society4 ,yet the community in which he taught was deemed a religious community2 and the teacher himself prayed in his school1 morning and evening6 ,others ,i have known to conduct even worse1 though perhaps not quite so openly4 ,i mention these things1 not to reproach teachers1--for ,i think their moral character1 in this country1 generally1 far better than their intellectual1--but as a specimen of perversion in the public sentiment2 and also as a hint to all who have the care of the young4 ,pupils at school1 cannot fail to make correct inferences from such facts as the foregoing4 #d4 ,,double ,,entendres4#ae ,by this is meant seemingly decent speeches1 with double meanings4 ,i mention these because they prevail1 in some parts of the country1 to a most alarming degree2 and because parents seem to regard them as perfectly harmless4 ,shall ,i say--to show the extent of the evil--that they are sometimes heard from both parents8 ,now no serious observer of human life and conduct can doubt that by every species of impure language1 whether in the form of hints1 innuendoes1 double entendres1 or plainer speech1 impure thoughts are awakened1 a licentious imagination inflamed1 and licentious purposes formed1 which would otherwise never have existed4 ,of all such things an inspired writer has long ago said--and the language is still applicable2--',let them not be so much as named among you4' ,i have been in families where these loose insinuations1 and coarse innuendoes were so common1 that the presence of respectable company scarcely operated as a restraint upon the unbridled tongues1 even of the parents6 ,many of these things had been repeated so often1 and under such circumstances that the children1 at a very early age1 perfectly understood their meaning and import4 ,yet had these very same children asked for direct information1 at this time1 on the subjects which had been rendered familiar to them thus incidentally1 the parents would have startled2 and would undoubtedly have repeated to them part of a string of falsehoods1 with which they had been in the habit of attempting to 'cover up' these matters2 though with the effect1 in the end1 of rendering the children only so much the more curious and inquisitive4 ,but this is not all4 ,the filling of the juvenile mind1 long before nature brings the body to maturity1 with impure imaginations1 not only preoccupies the ground which is greatly needed for something else1 and fills it with shoots of a noxious growth1 but actually induces1 if ,i may so say1 a precocious maturity4 ,what ,i mean1 is1 that there arises a morbid or diseased state of action of the vessels of the sexual system1 which paves the way for premature physical developement1 and greatly increases the danger of youthful irregularity4 #ae ,pronounced entaunders4 #e4 ,,evening ,,parties4 ,one prolific source of licentious feeling and action may be found1 ,i think1 in evening parties1 especially when protracted to a late hour4 ,it has always appeared to me that the injury to health which either directly or indirectly grows out of evening parties1 was a sufficient objection to their recurrence1 especially when the assembly is crowded1 the room greatly heated1 or when music and dancing are the accompaniments4 ,not a few young ladies1 who after perspiring freely at the latter exercise1 go out into the damp night air1 in a thin dress1 contract consumption2 and both sexes are very much exposed1 in this way1 to colds1 rheumatisms1 and fevers4 ,but the great danger1 after all1 is to reputation and morals4 ,think of a group of one hundred young ladies and gentlemen assembling at evening1 and under cover of the darkness1 joining in conclave1 and heating themselves with exercise and refreshments of an exciting nature1 such as coffee1 tea1 wine1 c1 and in some parts of our country with diluted distilled spirit2 and 'keeping up the steam1' as it is sometimes called1 till twelve or one o'clock1 and frequently during the greater part of the night4 ,for what kind and degree of vice1 do not such scenes prepare those who are concerned in them8 ,nothing which is here said is intended to be levelled against dancing1 in itself considered2 but only against such a use1 or rather abuse of it as is made to inflame and feed impure imaginations and bad passions4 ,on the subject of dancing as an amusement1 ,i have already spoken in another part of the work4 ,i have often wondered why the strange opinion has come to prevail1 especially among the industrious yeomanry of the interior of our country1 that it is economical to turn night into day1 in this manner4 ,because they cannot very well spare their sons or apprentices in the daytime1 as they suppose1 they suffer them to go abroad in the evening1 and perhaps to be out all night1 when it may justly be questioned whether the loss of energy which they sustain does not result in a loss of effort during one or two subsequent days1 at least equal to the waste of a whole afternoon4 ,i am fully convinced1 on my own part1 that he who should give up to his son or hired laborer an afternoon1 would actually lose a less amount of labor1 taking the week together1 than he who should only give up for this purpose the hours which nature intended should be spent in sleep4 ,but--,i repeat it--the moral evil outweighs all other considerations4 ,it needs not an experience of thirty years1 nor even of twenty1 to convince even a careless observer that no small number of our youth of both sexes1 have1 through the influence of late evening parties1 gone down to the chambers of drunkenness and debauchery2 and1 with the young man mentioned by ,solomon1 descended through them to those of death and hell4 ,it may be worth while for those sober minded and1 otherwise1 judicious ,christians1 who are in the habit of attending fashionable parties at late hours1 and taking their 'refreshments1' to consider whether they may not be a means of keeping up1 by their example1 those more vulgar assemblies1 with all their grossness1 which ,i have been describing4 ,is it not obvious that what the wine1 and the fruit1 and the oysters1 are to the more refined and ,christian circles1 wine and fermented liquors may be to the more blunt sensibilities of body and mind1 in youthful circles of another description8 ,but if so1 where rests the guilt8 ,or shall we bless the fountains1 while we curse the stream they form8 ,,section ,,iii4 ,diseases of ,licentiousness4 ,the importance of this and the foregoing section will be differently estimated by different individuals4 ,they were not inserted1 however1 without consideration1 nor without the approbation of persons who enjoy a large measure of public confidence4 ,the young ought at least to know1 briefly1 to what a formidable host of maladies secret vice is exposed4 #a4 ,insanity4 ,the records of hospitals show that insanity1 from solitary indulgence1 is common4 ,tissot1 ,esquirol1 ,eberle1 and others1 give ample testimony on this point4 ,the latter1 from a careful examination of the facts1 assures us that in ,paris the proportion of insane persons whose diseases may be traced to the source in question1 is one in from fifty-one to fifty-eight1 in the lower classes4 ,in the higher classes it is one in twenty-three4 ,in the insane ,hospital of ,massachusetts--,i have it from authority which ,i cannot question1--the proportion is at least one in three or four4 ,at present there are about twenty cases of the kind alluded to4 #b4 ,chorea ,sancti ,viti2 or ,st4 ,vitus's dance4 ,this strange disease1 in which the muscles of the body are not always at the command of the patient1 and in which the head1 the arms1 the legs1 and indeed every part which is made for muscular motion often jerks about in a very singular manner1 is sometimes produced in the same way4 ,insanity and this disease are occasionally combined4 ,i have known one young man in this terrible condition1 and have read authentic accounts of others4 #c4 ,epilepsy4 ,epileptic or falling sickness fits1 as they are sometimes denominated1 are another very common scourge of secret vice4 ,how much they are to be dreaded almost every one can judge2 for there are few who have not seen those who are afflicted with them4 ,they usually weaken the mind1 and sometimes entirely destroy it4 ,i knew one epileptic individual who used to dread them more than death2 and would gladly have preferred the latter4 #d4 ,idiotism4 ,epilepsy1 as ,i have already intimated1 often runs on to idiotism2 but sometimes the miserable young man becomes an idiot1 without the intervention of any other obvious disease4 #e4 ,paralysis or ,palsy1 is no uncommon punishment of this transgression4 ,there are1 however1 several forms of this disease4 ,sometimes1 a slight numbness of a single toe or finger is the first symptom of its approach2 but at others a whole hand1 arm1 or leg is affected4 ,in the present case1 the first attacks are not very violent1 as if to give the offender opportunity to return to the path of rectitude4 ,few1 however1 take the hint and return1 till the chains of their slavery are riveted1 and their health destroyed by this or some other form of disease4 ,i have seen dissipated young men who complained of the numbness of a finger or two and the corresponding portion of the hand and wrist1 who probably did not themselves suspect the cause2 but ,i never knew the disorder permanently removed1 except by a removal of the cause which produced it4 #f4 ,apoplexy4 ,this has occasionally happened2 though more rarely4 #g4 ,blindness1 in some of its forms1 especially of that form usually called gutta serena1 should also be added to our dark catalogue4 ,indeed a weakness of sight is among the first symptoms that supervene on these occasions4 #h4 ,hypochondria4 ,this is as much a disease by itself as the small pox1 though many regard it otherwise4 ,the mind is diseased1 and the individual has many imaginary sufferings1 it is true2 but the imagination would not be thus unnaturally awake1 if there were no accompanying disturbance in the bodily functions4 ,hypochondria1 in its more aggravated forms1 is a very common result of secret vice4 #i4 ,phthisis1 or consumption1 is still more frequently produced by the cause we are considering1 than any other disease ,i have mentioned4 ,and we know well the history of this disease2 that1 though slow in its progress1 the event is certain4 ,in this climate1 it is one of the most destructive scourges of our race4 ,if the ordinary diseases slay their thousands1 consumption slays its tens of thousands4 ,its approach is gradual1 and often unsuspected2 and the decline to the grave sometimes unattended by any considerable suffering4 ,is it not madness to expose ourselves to its attacks for the shortlived gratifications of a moment8 ,there is indeed a peculiar form of this disease which1 in the case in question1 is more commonly produced than any other4 ,it is called1 in the language of physicians1 tabes dorsalis1 or dorsal consumption2 because it is supposed to arise from the dorsal portion of the spinal marrow4 ,this disease sometimes1 it is true1 attacks young married people1 especially where they go beyond the bounds which the ,author of nature intended2 and it is occasionally produced by other causes entirely different2 causes1 too1 which it would be difficult1 if not impossible to prevent4 ,generally1 however1 it is produced by solitary vice4 ,the most striking symptom of this disease is described as being a 'sensation of ants1 crawling from the head down along the spine2' but this sensation is not always felt1 for sometimes in its stead there is1 rather1 a very great weakness of the small part of the back1 attended with pain4 ,this is accompanied with emaciation1 and occasionally1 though not always1 with an irregular appetite4 ,indeed1 persons affected with this disease generally have a good appetite4 ,there is usually little fever1 or at most only a slight heat and thirst towards evening1 with occasional flushings of the face2 and still more rarely1 profuse perspirations in the latter part of the night4 ,but the latter symptom belongs more properly to common consumption4 ,the sight1 as ,i have already mentioned1 grows dim2 they have pains in the head and sometimes ringing in the ears1 and a loss of memory4 ,finally1 the legs become weak1 the kidneys and stomach suffer1 and many other difficulties arise which ,i cannot mention in this work1 followed often by an acute fever2 and unless the abominable practice which produced all the mischief is abandoned1 death follows4 ,but when many of the symptoms which ,i have mentioned1 are really fastened upon an individual1 he has sustained an injury which can never be wholly repaired4 ,all he can hope is to prolong his days1 and lengthen out his life--often a distressing one4 ,a few well authenticated examples of persons who debased themselves by secret vice1 will1 ,i hope1 satisfy those who doubt the evils of this practice4 ,one young man thus expressed his sufferings to his physician4 ',my very great debility renders the performance of every motion difficult4 ,that of my legs is often so great1 that ,i can scarcely stand erect2 and ,i fear to leave my chamber4 ,digestion is so imperfect that the food passes unchanged1 three or four hours after it has been taken into the stomach4 ,i am oppressed with phlegm1 the presence of which causes pain2 and the expectoration1 exhaustion4 ,this is a brief history of my miseries4 ,each day brings with it an increase of all my woes4 ,nor do ,i believe that any human creature ever suffered more4 ,without a special interposition of ,divine ,providence1 ,i cannot support so painful an existence4' ,another thus writes2 ',were ,i not restrained by sentiments of religion1#af ,i should ere this have put an end to my existence2 which is the more insupportable as it is caused by myself4' ',i cannot walk two hundred paces1' says another 'without resting myself2 my feebleness is extreme2 ,i have constant pains in every part of the body1 but particularly in the shoulders and chest4 ,my appetite is good1 but this is a misfortune1 since what ,i eat causes pains in my stomach1 and is vomited up4 ,if ,i read a page or two1 my eyes are filled with tears and become painful3--,i often sigh involuntarily4' ,a fourth says2 ',i rest badly at night1 and am much troubled with dreams4 ,the lower part of my back is weak1 my eyes are often painful1 and my eyelids swelled and red4 ,i have an almost constant cold2 and an oppression at the stomach4 ,in short1 ,i had rather be laid in the silent tomb1 and encounter that dreadful uncertainty1 hereafter1 than remain in my present unhappy and degraded situation4' ,the reader should remember that the persons whose miseries are here described1 were generally sufferers from hypochondria4 ,they had not advanced to the still more horrid stages of palsy1 apoplexy1 epilepsy1 idiotism1 ,st4 ,vitus's dance1 blindness1 or insanity4 ,but they had gone so far1 that another step in the same path1 might have rendered a return impossible4 ,the reader will spare me the pain of presenting1 in detail1 any more of these horrid cases4 ,i write for ,,young ,,men1 the strength--the bone1 muscle1 sinew1 and nerve--of our beloved country4 ,i write for those who1--though some of them may have erred--are glad to be advised1 and if they deem the advice good1 are anxious to follow it4 ,i write1 too1 in vain1 if it be not for young men who will resolve on reformation1 when they believe that their present and future happiness is at stake4 ,and1 lastly1 ,i have not read correctly the pages in the book of human nature if ,i do not write for those who can1 with ,god's help1 keep every good resolution4 ,there are a few publications to which those who are awake to the importance of this subject1 might safely be directed4 ,one or two will be mentioned presently4 ,it is true that their authors have1 in some instances1 given us the details of such cases of disease as occur but rarely4 ,still1 what has happened1 in this respect1 may happen again4 ,and as no moderate drinker of fermented or spirituous liquors can ever know1 with certainty1 that if he continues his habit1 he may not finally arrive at confirmed drunkenness1 and the worst diseases which attend it1 so no person who departs but once from rectitude in the matter before us1 has any assurance that he shall not sooner or later suffer all the evils which they so faithfully describe4 ,when a young man1 who is pursuing an unhappy course of solitary vice1 threatened as we have seen by the severest penalties earth or heaven can impose1--begins to perceive a loss or irregularity of his appetite2 acute pains in his stomach1 especially during digestion1 and constant vomitings2--when to this is added a weakness of the lungs1 often attended by a dry cough1 hoarse weak voice1 and hurried or difficult breathing after using considerable exertion1 with a general relaxation of the nervous system2--when these appearances1 or symptoms1 as physicians call them1 take place--let him beware6 for punishment of a severer kind cannot be distant4 ,i hope ,i shall have no reader to whom these remarks apply2 but should it be otherwise1 happy will it be for him if he takes the alarm1 and walks not another step in the downward road to certain and terrible retribution4 ,happiest1 however1 is he who has never erred from the first2 and who reads these pages as he reads of those awful scenes in nature1--the devastations of the lightning1 the deluge1 the tornado1 the earthquake1 and the volcano2 as things to be lamented1 and their horrors if possible mitigated or averted1 but with which he has little personal concern4 ,sympathizing1 however1 with his fellow beings--for though fallen1 they still belong to the same family--should any reader who sees this work1 wish to examine the subject still more intimately1 ,i recommend to him a ,lecture to ,young ,men1 lately published in ,providence4 ,i would also refer him1 to ,rees' ,cyclopedia1 art4 ,physical ,education4 ,the article last referred to is so excellent1 that ,i have decided on introducing1 in this place1 the closing paragraph4 ,the writer had been treating the subject1 much in the manner ,i have done1 only at greater length1 and had enumerated the diseases to which it leads1 at the same time insisting on the importance of informing the young1 in a proper manner1 of their danger1 wherever the urgency of the case required it4 ,after quoting numerous passages of ,scripture1 which1 in speaking of impurity1 evidently include this practice1 and denouncing it in severe terms1 he closes with the following striking remarks4 ',there can be no doubt that ,god has forbidden it by the usual course of providence4 ,its moral effects1 in destroying the purity of the mind1 in swallowing up its best affections1 and perverting its sensibilities into this depraved channel1 are among its most injurious consequences2 and are what render it so peculiarly difficult to eradicate the evil4 ,in proportion as the habit strengthens the difficulty of breaking it1 of course1 increases2 and while the tendency of the feelings to this point increases1 the vigor of the mind to effect the conquest of the habit gradually lessens4 ',we would tell him 7the misguided young man7 that whatever might be said in newspapers respecting the power of medicine in such cases1 nothing could be done without absolute self-control2 and that no medicine whatever could retrieve the mischiefs which the want of it had caused3 and that the longer the practice was continued1 the greater would be the bodily and mental evils it would inevitably occasion4 ',we would then advise him to avoid all situations in which he found his propensities excited2 and especially1 as far as possible1 all in which they had been gratified2 to check the thoughts and images which excited them2 to shun those associates1 or at least that conversation1 and those books1 which have the same effect2 to avoid all stimulating food and liquor2 to sleep cool on a hard bed2 to rise early1 and at once2 and to go to bed when likely to fall asleep at once2 to let his mind be constantly occupied1 though not exerted to excess2 and to let his bodily powers be actively employed1 every day1 to a degree which will make a hard bed the place of sound repose4 ',above all1 we would urge him to impress his mind 7at times when the mere thought of it would not do him harm7 with a feeling of horror at the practice2 to dwell upon its sinfulness and most injurious effects2 and to cultivate1 by every possible means1 an habitual sense of the constant presence of a holy and heart-searching ,god1 and a lively conviction of the awful effects of his displeasure4' ,i should be sorry to leave an impression on any mind that other forms of licentiousness are innocent1 or that they entail no evils on the constitution4 ,i have endeavored to strike most forcibly1 it is true1 at solitary vice2 but it was for this plain reason1 that few of the young seem to regard it as any crime at all4 ,some even consider it indispensable to health4 ,this belief ,i have endeavored to shake2 with how much success1 eternity only can determine4 ,of the guilt of those forms of irregularity1 in which more than one individual and sex are necessarily concerned1 many of the young are already apprized4 ,at least they are generally acquainted with the more prominent evils which result from what they call excess4 ,still if followed in what they deem moderation1 and with certain precautions which could be named1 not a few are ready to believe1 at least in the moment of temptation1 that there is no great harm in following their inclinations4 ,now in regard to what constitutes excess1 every one who is not moved by ,christian principle1 will of necessity1 have his own standard1 just as it is in regard to solitary vice1 or the use of ardent spirits4 ,and herein consists a part of the guilt4 ,and it is not till this conviction of our constant tendency to establish an incorrect standard for ourselves1 and to go1 in the end1 to the greatest lengths and depths and heights of guilt1 can be well established in our minds1 that we shall ever be induced to avoid the first steps in that road which may end in destruction2 and to take as the only place of safety1 the high ground of total abstinence4 ,but although the young are not wholly destitute of a sense of the evils of what they call excess1 and of the shame of what is well known to be its frequent and formidable results1--so far as themselves are concerned1--yet they seem wholly ignorant of any considerable danger short of this4 ,for so far are they from admitting that the force of conscience is weakened by every repeated known and wilful transgression1 many think1 7as ,i have already stated7 promiscuous intercourse1 where no matrimonial rights are invaded1 if it be so managed as to exempt the parties immediately concerned from all immediate suffering both moral and physical1 can scarcely be called a transgression1 at all4 ,i wish it were practicable to extend these remarks far enough to show1 as plain as noon-day light can make it1 that every criminal act of this kind--,i mean every instance of irregularity--not only produces evil to society generally1 in the present generation1 but also inflicts evil on those that follow4 ,for to say nothing of those horrid cases where the infants of licentious parents not only inherit vicious dispositions1 but ruined bodies--even to a degree1 that in some instances excludes a possibility of the child's surviving many days2--there are other forms of disease often entailed on the young which as certainly consign the sufferer to an early grave1 though the passage thither may be more tedious and lingering4 ,how must it wring the heart of a feeling young parent to see his first born child1 which for any thing he knows1 might have been possessed of a sound and vigorous body1 like other children1 enter the world with incipient scrofula1 diseased joints or bones1 and eruptive diseases1 in some of their worst forms8 ,must not the sight sink him to the very dust8 ,and would he not give worlds--had he worlds to give--to reverse those irreversible but inscrutable decrees of ,heaven1 which visit the sins of parents upon their descendants--'unto the third and fourth generation8' ,but how easy is it1 by timely reflection1 and fixed moral principle1 to prevent much of that disease which 'worlds' cannot wholly cure1 when it is once inflicted6 ,i hazard nothing in saying1 then--and ,i might appeal to the whole medical profession to sustain me in my assertion--that no person whose system ever suffers1 once1 from those forms of disease which approach nearest to the character of special judgments of ,heaven on sin or shame1 can be sure of ever wholly recovering from their effects on his own person2 and what is still worse1 can ever be sure of being the parent of a child whose constitution shall be wholly untainted with disease1 of one kind or another4 ,this matter is not often understood by the community generally2 especially by the young4 ,i might tell them of the diseased eyesight2 the ulcerated--perhaps deformed--nose and ears1 and neck2 the discoloration1 decay1 and loss of teeth2 the destruction of the palate1 and the fearful inroads of disease on many other soft parts of the body2 besides the softening and ulceration and decay and eventual destruction of the bones2 and to crown all1 the awfully offensive breath and perspiration2 and ,i might entreat them to abstain1 in the fear of ,god1 from those abuses of the constitution which not unfrequently bring down upon them such severe forms of punishment4 ,a thorough knowledge of the human system and the laws to which all organized bodies are subjected1 would1 in this respect1 do much in behalf of mankind2 for such would be the change of public sentiment1 that the sensual could not hold up their heads so boldly1 as they now do1 in the face of it4 ,happy for mankind when the vicious shall be obliged1 universally1 to pass in review before this enlightened tribunal6 ,young men ought to study physiology4 ,it is indeed to be regretted that there are so few books on this subject adapted to popular use4 ,but in addition to those recommended at page #cdf1 there are portions of several works which may be read with advantage by the young4 ,such are some of the more intelligible parts of ,richerand's ,physiology1 as at page #ch of the edition with ,dr4 ,chapman's notes2 and of the ',outlines of ,physiology1' and the ',anatomical ,class ,book1' two works recently issued in ,boston4 ,it must1 however1 be confessed1 that none of these works are sufficiently divested of technicalities1 to be well adapted1 as a whole1 to the general reader4 ,physiology is one of those fountains at which it is somewhat dangerous to 'taste1' unless we 'drink deep2' on account of the tendency of superficial knowledge to empiricism4 ,still1 ,i am fully of the opinion that even superficial knowledge1 on this long neglected topic1 is less dangerous both to the individual and to the community1 than entire ignorance4 ,and after all1 the best guides would be ,,parents4 ,when will ,heaven confer such favors upon us8 ,when will parents become parents indeed8 ,when will one father or mother in a hundred1 exercise the true parental prerogative1 and point out to those whom ,god has given them1 as circumstances may from time to time demand1 the most dangerous rocks and whirlpools to which1 in the voyage of life1 they are exposed8 ,when will every thing else be done for the young rather than that which ought never to be left undone8 ,say not1 young reader1 that ,i am wandering4 ,you may be a father4 ,god grant that if you are1 you may also act the parent4 ,let me beg you to resolve1 and if necessary re-resolve4 ,and not only resolve1 but act4 ,if you are ready to pronounce me enthusiastic on this subject1 let me beg you to suspend your judgment till the responsibilities and the duties and the anxieties of a parent thicken round you4 ,it is painful to see--every where--the most unquestionable evidence that this department of education is unheeded4 ,do you ask how the evidence is obtained8 ,i answer by asking you how the physician can discover1--as undoubtedly he can1--the progress of the drinker of spirituous liquors1 by his eye1 his features1 his breath1 nay his very perspiration4 ,and do you think that the sons or daughters of sensuality1 in any of its forms1 and at any of its stages1 can escape his observation8 ,but of what use is his knowledge1 if he may not communicate it8 ,what person would endure disclosures of this kind respecting himself or his nearest1 perhaps his dearest and most valued friends8 ,no6 the physician's lips must be sealed1 and his tongue dumb2 and the young must go down to their graves1 rather than permit him to make any effort to save them1 lest offence should be given6 ,the subject is1 however1 gaining a hold on the community1 for which none of us can be too thankful4 ,i am acquainted with more than one parent1 who is a parent indeed2 for there is no more reserve on these subjects1 than any other4 ,the sons do not hesitate to ask parental counsel and seek parental aid1 in every known path of temptation4 ,heaven grant that such instances may be speedily multiplied4 ,a greater work of reform can scarcely be desired or anticipated4 ,but ,i must draw to a close4 ,oh that the young 'wise1' and that they would 'consider6' ',there is a way which seemeth right unto a man1 but the end thereof is death4' ,there is1 then1 but one course for the young4 ,let them do that which they know to be right1 and avoid not only that which they are sure is wrong1 but that also of which they have doubts4 ,let them do this1 moreover1 in the fear and love of ,god4 ,in the language of a great statesman of the ,united ,states to his nephew1 a little before his death1 let me exhort you1 to ',give up property1 give up every thing--give up even life itself1 rather than presume to do an immoral act4' ,let me remind you too1 of the declaration of that ,wisdom which is ,infinite2--',,he ,,that ,,sinneth ,,against ,,god1 ,,destroyeth ,,his ,,own ,,soul4' #af ,what inadequate ideas are sometimes entertained by young professors of religion1 and even by those more advanced1 in regard to the purity of character which is indispensable to the enjoyment of a world of bliss--a world whose very source1 sum1 end and essence1 are ,infinite ,purity itself6 ,since the first edition of this work was published1 ,i have received several letters of thanks for having ventured upon this long neglected1 but important subject4 ,teachers1 especially1 have acknowledged their obligations1 both in person and by correspondence4 ,one teacher1 in particular1 a man of considerable experience1 writes as follows3-- ',the last chapter of the book1 is by no means1 in my view1 the least important4 ,i regret to say that many religious young men1 through ignorance1 are attached to the last mentioned vice4 ,i could wish that what you have written could be carefully read by every young man1 at least1 in our land4 ,alas1 dear sir1 how little do mortals know1 when they do not understand their physical structure6' ,,an ,,additional ,,chapter4 ,,section ,i4 ,choice of ,friends4 ,the importance1 to a young man1 of a few worthy female friends1 has been mentioned in ,chapter ,v4 ,but to him who aspires at the highest possible degree of improvement or usefulness1 a select number of confidential friends of his own sex is scarcely less valuable4 ,great caution is however necessary in making the selection4 ,a man is known by the company he keeps1 has long since passed into a proverb2 so well does it accord with universal experience4 ,and yet many a young man neglects or despises this maxim1 till his reputation is absolutely and irretrievably lost4 ,lucius was a remarkable instance of this kind4 ,extremely diffident1 he was introduced to a neighborhood where every individual but one was an entire stranger to him2 and this person was one whose character was despised4 ,but what is life without associates8 ,few are wholly destitute of sympathy1 even brute animals4 ,lucius began to be found in the company of the young man ,i have mentioned2 and this too in spite of the faithful and earnest remonstrances of his friends1 who foresaw the consequences4 ,but1 like too many inexperienced young men1 conscious of his own purity of intention1 he thought there could surely be no harm in occasional walks and conversations with even a bad man2 and who knows1 he sometimes used to say1 but ,i may do him good8 ,at any rate1 as he was the only person with whom he could hold free conversation on things that were past1 he determined occasionally to associate with him4 ,but as it is with many a young lady who has set out with the belief that a reformed rake makes the best husband1 so it was with ,lucius2 he found that the work of reforming the vicious was no easy task4 ,instead of making the smallest approaches to success1 he perceived at last1 when it was too late1 that his familiarity with young ,frederick had not only greatly lowered him in the estimation of the people with whom he now resided1 but even in the estimation of ,frederick himself2 who was encouraged to pursue his vicious course1 by the consideration that it did not exclude him from the society of those who were universally beloved and respected4 ,this anecdote shows how cautious we ought to be in the choice of friends4 ,had ,lucius been a minister or reformer by profession1 he could have gone among the vicious to reclaim them1 with less danger4 ,the ,saviour of mankind ate and drank with publicans and sinners2 but ,,he was well known as going among them to save them1 though even he did not wholly escape obloquy4 ,few are aware1 how much they are the creatures of imitation2 and how readily they catch the manners1 habits of expression1 and even modes of thinking1 of those whose company they keep4 ,let the young remember1 then1 that it is not from the remarks of others1 alone1 that they are likely to suffer2 but that they are really lowered in the scale of excellence1 every time they come in unguarded contact with the vicious4 ,it is of the highest importance to seek for companions those who are not only intelligent and virtuous1 in the common acceptation of the term1 but1 if it were possible1 those who are a little above them1 especially in moral excellence4 ,nor is this so difficult a task as many suppose4 ,there are in every community1 a few who would make valuable companions4 ,not that they are perfect1--for perfection1 in the more absolute sense of the term1 belongs not to humanity2 but their characters are such1 that they would greatly improve yours4 ,and remember1 that it is by no means indispensable that your circle of intimate friends be very large4 ,nay1 it is not even desirable1 in a world like this4 ,you may have many acquaintances1 but ,i should advise you to have but few near friends4 ,if you have one1 who is what he should be1 you are comparatively happy4 ,,section ,,ii4 ,rudeness of ,manners4 ,by rudeness ,i do not mean mere coarseness or rusticity1 for that were more pardonable2 but a want of civility4 ,in this sense of the term1 ,i am prepared to censure one practice1 which in the section on ,politeness1 was overlooked4 ,i refer to the practice so common with young men in some circumstances and places1 of wearing their hats or caps in the house2--a practice which1 whenever and wherever it occurs1 is decidedly reprehensible4 ,most of us have probably seen state legislatures in session with their hats on4 ,this does not look well for the representatives of the most civil communities in the known world2 and though ,i do not pretend that in this respect they fairly represent their constituents1 yet ,i do maintain that the toleration of such a practice implies a dereliction of the public sentiment4 ,that the practice of uncovering the head1 whenever we are in the house1 tends to promote health1 though true1 ,i do not at this time affirm4 ,it is sufficient for my present purpose1 if ,i succeed in showing that the contrary practice tends to vice and immorality4 ,who has not seen the rudeness of a company of men1 assembled perhaps in a bar-room--with their hats on2 and also witnessed the more decent behavior of another similar group1 assembled in similar circumstances1 without perceiving at once a connection between the hats and the rudeness of the one company1 as well as between the more orderly behavior and the uncovered heads of the other8 ,to come to individuals4 ,attend a party or concert--no matter about the name2--,i mean some place where it is pardonable1 or rather deemed pardonable1 to wear the hat4 ,who behave in the most gentle1 christian manner1--the few who wear their hats or those who take them off8 ,in a family or school1 which are the children that are most civil and well behaved8 ,is it not those who are most scrupulous1 always1 to appear within the house with their heads uncovered8 ,nay1 in going out of schools1 churches1 c41 who are they that put on their hats first1 as if it was a work of self-denial to hold them in their hands1 or even suffer them to remain in their place till the blessing is pronounced1 or till the proper time has arrived for using them8 ,once more4 ,in passing through ,new ,england or any other part of the ,united ,states1 entering into the houses of the people1 and seeing them just as they are1 who has not been struck with the fact that where there is the most of wearing hats and caps in the house1 there is generally the most of ill manners1 not to say of vicious habits and conduct4 ,few are sufficiently aware of the influence of what they often affect to despise as little things4 ,but ,i have said enough on this point in its proper place4 ,the great difficulty is in carrying the principles there inculcated into the various conditions of life1 and properly applying them4 ,,section ,,iii4 ,self-praise4 ,some persons are such egotists that rather than not be conspicuous1 they will even speak ill of themselves4 ,this may seem like a contradiction2 but it is nevertheless a truth4 ,such conduct is explicable in two ways4 ,self condemnation may be merely an attempt to extort praise from the bystanders1 by leading them to deny our statements1 or defend our conduct4 ,or1 it may be an attempt to set ourselves off as abounding in self knowledge2 a kind of knowledge which is universally admitted to be difficult of attainment4 ,i have heard people condemn their past conduct in no measured terms1 who would not have borne a tithe of the same severity of remark from others4 ,perhaps it is not too much to affirm that persons of this description are often among the vainest1 if not the proudest of the community4 ,in general1 it is the best way to say as little about ourselves1 our friends1 our books1 and our circumstances as possible4 ,it is soon enough to speak of ourselves when we are compelled to do it in our own defence4