99 99 99 99 99 ---------------------------------------- ------------------- ,transcriber's ,note3 ,inconsistent hyphenation in the original document has been preserved4 ,obvious typographical errors have been corrected4 ,for a complete list1 please see the end of this document4 ---------------------------------------- ------------------- 99 99 99 99 99 ,the ,wedding ,ring4 ,a ,series of ,discourses for ,husbands and ,wives and ,those ,contemplating ,matrimony4 ,illustration ,by ,t4 ,,de ,,witt ,,talmage4 ,reprinted from ,,the ,,christian ,,herald4 ,,published ,,by ,,the ,,christian ,,herald1 ,,louis ,,klopsch1 ,proprietor1 ,,bible ,,house1 ,,new ,,york ,copyright1 #ahif1 ,,by ,,louis ,,klopsch4 ,,contents4 ,the ,choice of a ,wife1 #e ,the ,choice of a ,husband1 #bd ,clandestine ,marriage1 #db ,duties of ,husbands to ,wives1 #fj ,duties of ,wives to ,husbands1 #gh ,costume and ,morals1 #ie ,husbands and ,wives1 #aad ,matrimonial ,discords1 #acf ,hotels ,versus ,home1 #adh ,easy ,divorce1 #aff ,maternity1 #ahd ,the ,children's ,patrimony1 #aih ,the ,mother of ,all1 #bag ,sisterly ,influence1 #bcd ,trials of ,housekeeping1 #beb ,woman ,enthroned1 #bfh ,old ,folks' ,visit1 #bhf ,home1 ,sweet ,home1 #cjc ,the ,wedding ,ring4 ,,the ,,choice ,,of ,a ,,wife4 ,is there never a woman among the daughters of thy brethren1 or among all my people1 that thou goest to take a wife of the uncircumcised ,philistines8--,,judges #ad3c4 ,samson1 the giant1 is here asking consent of his father and mother to marriage with one whom they thought unfit for him4 ,he was wise in asking their counsel1 but not wise in rejecting it4 ,captivated with her looks1 the big son wanted to marry a daughter of one of the hostile families1 a deceitful1 hypocritical1 whining1 and saturnine creature1 who afterward made for him a world of trouble till she quit him forever4 ,in my text his parents forbade the banns1 practically saying3 ,when there are so many honest and beautiful maidens of your own country1 are you so hard put to for a lifetime partner that you propose conjugality with this foreign flirt8 ,is there such a dearth of lilies in our ,israelitish gardens that you must wear on your heart a ,philistine thistle8 ,do you take a crabapple because there are no pomegranates8 ,is there never a woman among the daughters of thy brethren1 or among all my people1 that thou goest to take a wife of the uncircumcised ,philistines8 ,,beautiful ,,jewesses4 ,excuseless was he for such a choice in a land and amid a race celebrated for female loveliness and moral worth1 a land and a race of which self-denying ,abigail1 and heroic ,deborah1 and dazzling ,miriam1 and pious ,esther1 and glorious ,ruth1 and ,mary1 who hugged to her heart the blessed ,lord1 were only magnificent specimens4 ,the midnight folded in their hair1 the lakes of liquid beauty in their eye1 the gracefulness of spring morning in their posture and gait1 were only typical of the greater brilliance and glory of their soul4 ,likewise excuseless is any man in our time who makes lifelong alliance with any one who1 because of her disposition1 or heredity1 or habits1 or intellectual vanity1 or moral twistification1 may be said to be of the ,philistines4 ,,modern ,,female ,,loveliness4 ,the world never owned such opulence of womanly character or such splendor of womanly manners or multitudinous instances of wifely1 motherly1 daughterly1 sisterly devotion1 as it owns to-day4 ,i have not words to express my admiration for good womanhood4 ,woman is not only man's equal1 but in affectional and religious nature1 which is the best part of us1 she is seventy-five per cent his superior4 ,yea1 during the last twenty years1 through the increased opportunity opened for female education1 the women of the country are better educated than the majority of men2 and if they continue to advance in mentality at the present ratio1 before long the majority of men will have difficulty in finding in the opposite sex enough ignorance to make appropriate consort4 ,if ,i am under a delusion as to the abundance of good womanhood abroad1 consequent upon my surroundings since the hour ,i entered this life until now1 ,i hope the delusion will last until ,i embark from this planet4 ,so you will understand1 if ,i say in this course of sermons something that seems severe1 ,i am neither cynical nor disgruntled4 ,,no ,,need ,,to ,,marry ,a ,,fool4 ,there are in almost every farmhouse in the country1 in almost every home of the great town1 conscientious women1 worshipful women1 self-sacrificing women1 holy women1 innumerable ,marys1 sitting at the feet of ,christ2 innumerable mothers1 helping to feed ,christ in the person of ,his suffering disciples2 a thousand capped and spectacled grandmothers ,lois1 bending over ,bibles whose precepts they have followed from early girlhood2 and tens of thousands of young women that are dawning upon us from school and seminary1 that are going to bless the world with good and happy homes1 that shall eclipse all their predecessors1 a fact that will be acknowledged by all men except those who are struck through with moral decay from toe to cranium2 and more inexcusable than the ,samson of the text is that man who1 amid all this unparalleled munificence of womanhood1 marries a fool4 ,but some of you are abroad suffering from such disaster1 and to halt others of you from going over the same precipice1 ,i cry out in the words of my text3 ,is there never a woman among the daughters of thy brethren1 or among all my people1 that thou goest to take a wife of the uncircumcised ,philistines8 ,,marriage ,,not ,,for ,,all4 ,that marriage is the destination of the human race is a mistake that ,i want to correct before ,i go further4 ,there are multitudes who never will marry1 and still greater multitudes who are not fit to marry4 ,in ,great ,britain to-day there are nine hundred and forty-eight thousand more women than men1 and that1 ,i understand1 is about the ratio in ,america4 ,by mathematical and inexorable law1 you see1 millions of women will never marry4 ,the supply for matrimony is greater than the demand1 the first lesson of which is that every woman ought to prepare to take care of herself if need be4 ,then there are thousands of men who have no right to marry1 because they have become so corrupt of character that their offer of marriage is an insult to any good woman4 ,society will have to be toned up and corrected on this subject1 so that it shall realize that if a woman who has sacrificed her honor is unfitted for marriage1 so is any man who has ever sacrificed his purity4 ,what right have you1 ,o masculine beast6 whose life has been loose1 to take under your care the spotlessness of a virgin reared in the sanctity of a respectable home8 ,will a buzzard dare to court a dove8 ,,the ,,first ,,step4 ,but the majority of you will marry1 and have a right to marry1 and as your religious teacher ,i wish to say to these men1 in the choice of a wife first of all seek divine direction4 ,about thirty-five years ago1 when ,martin ,farquhar ,tupper1 the ,english poet1 urged men to prayer before they decided upon matrimonial association1 people laughed4 ,and some of them have lived to laugh on the other side of their mouth4 ,,eminent ,,blunderers4 ,the need of divine direction ,i argue from the fact that so many men1 and some of them strong and wise1 have wrecked their lives at this juncture4 ,witness ,samson and this woman of ,timnath6 ,witness ,socrates1 pecked of the historical ,xantippe6 ,witness ,job1 whose wife had nothing to prescribe for his carbuncles but allopathic doses of profanity6 ,witness ,ananias1 a liar1 who might perhaps have been cured by a truthful spouse1 yet marrying as great a liar as himself--,sapphira6 ,witness ,john ,wesley1 one of the best men that ever lived1 united to one of the most outrageous and scandalous of women1 who sat in ,city ,road ,chapel1 making mouths at him while he preached6 ,witness the once connubial wretchedness of ,john ,ruskin1 the great art essayist1 and ,frederick ,w4 ,robertson1 the great preacher6 ,witness a thousand ,,hells ,,on ,,earth kindled by unworthy wives1 termagants that scold like a ,march north-easter2 female spendthrifts1 that put their husbands into fraudulent schemes to get money enough to meet the lavishment of domestic expenditure2 opium-using women--about four hundred thousand of them in the ,united ,states--who will have the drug1 though it should cause the eternal damnation of the whole household2 heartless and overbearing1 and namby-pamby and unreasonable women1 yet married--married perhaps to good men6 ,these are the women who build the low club-houses1 where the husbands and sons go because they can't stand it at home4 ,on this sea of matrimony1 where so many have been wrecked1 am ,i not right in advising divine pilotage8 ,,numerous ,,pitfalls4 ,especially is devout supplication needed1 because of the fact that society is so full of artificialities that men are deceived as to whom they are marrying1 and no one but the ,lord knows4 ,after the dressmaker1 and the milliner1 and the jeweler1 and the hair-adjuster1 and the dancing-master1 and the cosmetic art have completed their work1 how is an unsophisticated man to decipher the physiological hieroglyphics1 and make accurate judgment of who it is to whom he offers hand and heart8 ,this is what makes so many recreant husbands4 ,they make an honorable marriage contract1 but the goods delivered are so different from the sample by which they bargained4 ,they were simply swindled1 and they backed out4 ,they mistook ,jezebel for ,longfellow's ,evangeline1 and ,lucretia ,borgia for ,martha ,washington4 ,aye1 as the ,indian1 chief boasts1 of the scalps he has taken1 so there are in society to-day many coquettes who boast of the masculine hearts they have captured4 ,and these women1 though they may live amid richest upholstery1 are not so honorable as the cyprians of the street1 for these advertise their infamy1 while the former profess heaven while they mean hell4 ,there is so much counterfeit womanhood abroad it is no wonder that some cannot tell the genuine coin from the base4 ,do you not realize you need divine guidance when ,i remind you that mistake is possible in this important affair1 and1 if made1 is irrevocable8 ,a ,,mistake ,,irreparable4 ,the worst predicament possible is to be unhappily yoked together4 ,you see1 it is impossible to break the yoke4 ,the more you pull apart1 the more galling the yoke4 ,the minister might bring you up again1 and in your presence read the marriage ceremony backward1 might put you on the opposite sides of the altar from where you were when you were united1 might take the ring off of the finger1 might rend the wedding-veil asunder1 might tear out the marriage leaf from the family ,bible record1 but all that would fail to unmarry you4 ,it is better not to make the mistake than to attempt its correction4 ,but men and women do not reveal all their characteristics till after marriage1 and how are you to avoid committing the fatal blunder8 ,there is only one ,being in the universe who can tell you whom to choose1 and that is the ,lord of ,paradise4 ,he made ,eve for ,adam1 and ,adam for ,eve1 and both for each other4 ,adam had not a large group of women from whom to select his wife1 but it is fortunate1 judging from some mistakes which she afterward made1 that it was ,eve or nothing4 ,there is in all the world some one who was made for you1 as certainly as ,eve was made for ,adam4 ,all sorts of mistakes occur because ,eve was made out of a rib from ,adam's side4 ,nobody knows which of his twenty-four ribs was taken for the nucleus4 ,if you depend entirely upon yourself in the selection of a wife1 there are twenty-three possibilities to one that you will select the wrong rib4 ,by the fate of ,ahab1 whose wife induced him to steal2 by the fate of ,macbeth1 whose wife pushed him into massacre2 by the fate of ,james ,ferguson1 the philosopher1 whose wife entered the room while he was lecturing and willfully upset his astronomical apparatus1 so that he turned to the audience and said3 ,ladies and gentlemen1 ,i have the misfortune to be married to this woman2 by the fate of ,bulwer1 the novelist1 whose wife's temper was so incompatible that he furnished her a beautiful house near ,london and withdrew from her company1 leaving her with the dozen dogs whom she entertained as pets2 by the fate of ,john ,milton1 who married a termagant after he was blind1 and when some one called her a rose1 the poet said3 ,i am no judge of flowers1 but it may be so1 for ,i feel the thorns daily2 by the fate of an ,englishman whose wife was so determined to dance on his grave that he was buried in the sea2 by the fate of a village minister whom ,i knew1 whose wife threw a cup of hot tea across the table because they differed in sentiment--by all these scenes of disquietude and domestic calamity1 we implore you to be cautious and prayerful before you enter upon the connubial state1 which decides whether a man shall have two heavens or two hells1 a heaven here and heaven forever1 or a hell now and a hell hereafter4 ,,noble ,,wives4 ,by the bliss of ,pliny1 whose wife1 when her husband was pleading in court1 had messengers coming and going to inform her what impression he was making2 by the joy of ,grotius1 whose wife delivered him from prison under the pretence of having books carried out lest they be injurious to his health1 she sending out her husband unobserved in one of the bookcases2 by the good fortune of ,roland1 in ,louis' time1 whose wife translated and composed for her husband1 while ,secretary of the ,interior--talented1 heroic1 wonderful ,madame ,roland2 by the happiness of many a man who has made intelligent choice of one capable of being prime counsellor and companion in brightness and in grief--pray to ,almighty ,god1 morning1 noon1 and night that at the right time and in the right way ,he will send you a good1 honest1 loving1 sympathetic wife2 or if she is not sent to you1 that you may be sent to her4 ,,avoid ,,matchmakers4 ,at this point let me warn you not to let a question of this importance be settled by the celebrated matchmakers flourishing in almost every community4 ,depend upon your own judgment divinely illumined4 ,these brokers in matrimony are ever planning how they can unite impecunious innocence to an heiress1 or celibate woman to millionaire or marquis1 and that in many cases makes life an unhappiness4 ,how can any human being1 who knows neither of the two parties as ,god knows them1 and who is ignorant of the future1 give such direction as you require at such a crisis8 ,take the advice of the earthly matchmaker instead of the divine guidance1 and you may some day be led to use the words of ,solomon1 whose experience in home life was as melancholy as it was multitudinous4 ,one day his palace with its great wide rooms and great wide doors and great wide hall was too small for him and the loud tongue of a woman belaboring him about some of his neglects1 and he retreated to the housetop to get relief from the lingual bombardment4 ,and while there he saw a poor man on one corner of the roof with a mattress for his only furniture1 and the open sky his only covering4 ,and ,solomon envies him and cries out3 ,it is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop than with a brawling woman in a wide house4 ,and one day during the rainy season the water leaked through the roof of the palace and began to drop in a pail or pan set there to catch it4 ,and at one side of him all day long the water went drop6 drop6 drop6 while on the other side a female companion quarrelling about this1 and quarrelling about that1 the acrimonious and petulant words falling on his ear in ceaseless pelting--drop6 drop6 drop6 and he seized his pen and wrote3 ,a continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike4 ,if ,solomon had been as prayerful at the beginning of his life as he was at the close1 how much domestic infelicity he would have avoided6 ,but prayer about this will amount to nothing unless you pray soon enough4 ,wait until you are fascinated and the equilibrium of your soul is disturbed by a magnetic and exquisite presence1 and then you will answer your own prayers1 and you will mistake your own infatuation for the voice of ,god4 ,,avoid ,,scoffers4 ,if you have this prayerful spirit you will surely avoid all female scoffers at the ,christian religion2 and there are quite a number of them in all communities4 ,it must be told that1 though the only influence that keeps woman from being estimated and treated as a slave--aye1 as a brute and a beast of burden--is ,christianity1 since where it is not dominant she is so treated1 yet there are women who will so far forget themselves and forget their ,god that they will go and hear lecturers malign ,christianity and scoff at the most sacred things of the soul4 ,a good woman1 over-persuaded by her husband1 may go once to hear such a tirade against the ,christian religion1 not fully knowing what she is going to hear2 but she will not go twice4 ,a woman1 not a ,christian1 but a respecter of religion1 said to me3 ,i was persuaded by my husband to go and hear an infidel lecturer once1 but going home1 ,i said to him3 ',my dear husband1 ,i would not go again though my declinature should result in our divorcement forever4' ,and the woman was right4 ,if after all that ,christ and ,christianity have done for a woman1 she can go again and again to hear such assaults1 she is an awful creature1 and you had better not come near such a reeking lepress4 ,she needs to be washed1 and for three weeks to be soaked in carbolic acid1 and for a whole year1 fumigated1 before she is fit for decent society4 ,while it is not demanded that a woman be a ,christian before marriage1 she must have regard for the ,christian religion or she is a bad woman and unworthy of being your companion in a life charged with such stupendous solemnity and vicissitudes4 ,,two ,,essential ,,qualities4 ,what you want1 ,o man6 in a wife1 is not a butterfly of the sunshine1 not a giggling nonentity1 not a painted doll1 not a gossiping gadabout1 not a mixture of artificialities which leave you in doubt as to where the humbug ends and the woman begins1 but an earnest soul1 one that cannot only laugh when you laugh1 but weep when you weep4 ,there will be wide1 deep graves in your path of life1 and you will both want steadying when you come to the verge of them1 ,i tell you6 ,when your fortune fails you will want some one to talk of treasures in heaven1 and not charge upon you with a bitter1 ,i told you so4 ,as far as ,i can analyze it1 sincerity and earnestness are the foundation of all worthy wifehood4 ,get that1 and you get all4 ,fail to get that1 and you get nothing but what you will wish you never had got4 ,,beauty ,a ,,benediction4 ,don't make the mistake that the man of the text made in letting his eye settle the question in which coolest judgment directed by divine wisdom are all-important4 ,he who has no reason for his wifely choice except a pretty face is like a man who should buy a farm because of the dahlias in the front dooryard4 ,beauty is a talent1 and when ,god gives it ,he intends it as a benediction upon a woman's face4 ,when the good ,princess of ,wales dismounted from the railtrain last summer1 and ,i saw her radiant face1 ,i could understand what they told me the day before1 that1 when at the great military hospital where are now the wounded and the sick from the ,egyptian and other wars1 the ,princess passed through1 all the sick were cheered at her coming1 and those who could be roused neither by doctor nor nurse from their stupor1 would get up on their elbows to look at her1 and wan and wasted lips prayed an audible prayer3 ,god bless the ,princess of ,wales6 ,doesn't she look beautiful8 ,but how uncertain is the tarrying of beauty in a human countenance6 ,explosion of a kerosene lamp turns it into scarification1 and a scoundrel with one dash of vitriol may dispel it1 or ,time will drive his chariot wheels across that bright face1 cutting it up in deep ruts and gullies4 ,but there is an eternal beauty on the face of some women1 whom a rough and ungallant world may criticise as homely2 and though their features may contradict all the laws of ,lavater on physiognomy1 yet they have graces of soul that will keep them attractive for time and glorious through all eternity4 ,there are two or three circumstances in which the plainest wife is a queen of beauty to her husband1 whatever her stature or profile4 ,by financial panic or betrayal of business partner1 the man goes down1 and returning to his home that evening he says3 ,i am ruined2 ,i am in disgrace forever2 ,i care not whether ,i live or die4 ,it is an agitated story he is telling in the household that winter night4 ,he says3 ,the furniture must go1 the house must go1 the social position must go1 and from being sought for obsequiously they must be cold-shouldered everywhere4 ,after he ceases talking1 and the wife has heard all in silence1 she says3 ,is that all8 ,why1 you had nothing when ,i married you1 and you have only come back to where you started4 ,if you think that my happiness and that of the children depend on these trappings1 you do not know me1 though we have lived together thirty years4 ,god is not dead1 and the ,national ,bank of ,heaven has not suspended payment1 and if you don't mind1 ,i don't care a cent4 ,what little we need of food and raiment the rest of our lives we can get1 and ,i don't propose to sit down and mope and groan4 ,mary1 hand me that darning-needle4 ,i declare6 ,i have forgotten to set the rising for those cakes6 ,and while she is busy at it he hears her humming ,newton's old hymn1 ,to-,morrow3 ,it can bring with it nothing ,but ,he will bear us through2 ,who gives the lilies clothing ,will clothe ,his people too2 ,beneath the spreading heavens ,no creature but is fed2 ,and ,he who feeds the ravens ,will give ,his children bread4 ,though vine nor fig-tree either ,their wonted fruit should bear1 ,though all the fields should wither ,nor flocks nor herds be there2 ,yet ,god the same abiding1 ,his praise shall tune my voice2 ,for while in ,him confiding ,i cannot but rejoice4 ,the husband looks up in amazement1 and says3 ,well1 well1 you are the greatest woman ,i ever saw4 ,i thought you would faint dead away when ,i told you4 ,and as he looks at her1 all the glories of physiognomy in the court of ,louis ,,xv4 on the modern fashion plates are tame as compared with the superhuman splendors of that woman's face4 ,joan of ,arc1 ,mary ,antoinette1 and ,la ,belle ,hamilton1 the enchantment of the court of ,charles ,,ii41 are nowhere4 ,a ,,wife',s ,,death4 ,there is another time when the plainest wife is a queen of beauty to her husband4 ,she has done the work of life4 ,she has reared her children for ,god and heaven1 and though some of them may be a little wild they will yet come back1 for ,god has promised4 ,she is dying1 and her husband stands by4 ,they think over all the years of their companionship1 the weddings and the burials1 the ups and the downs1 the successes and the failures4 ,they talk over the goodness of ,god and ,his faithfulness to children's children4 ,she has no fear about going4 ,the ,lord has sustained her so many years she would not dare to distrust ,him now4 ,the lips of both of them tremble as they say good-bye and encourage each other about an early meeting in a better world4 ,the breath is feebler and feebler1 and stops4 ,are you sure of it8 ,just hold that mirror at the mouth1 and see if there is any vapor gathering on the surface4 ,gone6 ,as one of the neighbors takes the old man by the arm and gently says3 ,come1 you had better go into the next room and rest1 he says3 ,wait a moment2 ,i must take one more look at that face and at those hands6 ,beautiful6 ,beautiful6 ,my friends1 ,i hope you do not call that death4 ,that is an autumnal sunset4 ,that is a crystalline river pouring into a crystal sea4 ,that is the solo of human life overpowered by hallelujah chorus4 ,that is a queen's coronation4 ,that is heaven4 ,that is the way my father stood at eighty-two1 seeing my mother depart at seventy-nine4 ,perhaps so your father and mother went4 ,i wonder if we shall die as well8 ,,the ,,choice ,,of ,a ,,husband4 ,the ,lord grant you that ye may find rest1 each of you in the house of her husband4--,,ruth #a3i4 ,this was the prayer of pious ,naomi for ,ruth and ,orpah1 and is an appropriate prayer now in behalf of unmarried womanhood4 ,naomi1 the good old soul1 knew that the devil would take their cases in hand if ,god did not1 so she prays3 ,the ,lord grant you that ye may find rest1 each of you in the house of her husband4 ,in this series of sermons on ,the ,wedding ,ring ,i last ,sabbath gave prayerful and ,christian advice to men in regard to the selection of a wife1 and to-day ,i give the same prayerful and ,christian advice to women in regard to the selection of a husband1 but in all these sermons saying much that ,i hope will be appropriate for all ages and all classes4 ,,voluntary ,,celibacy4 ,i applaud the celibacy of a multitude of women who1 rather than make unfit selection1 have made none at all4 ,it has not been a lack of opportunity for marital contract on their part1 but their own culture and refinement1 and their exalted idea as to what a husband ought to be1 have caused their declinature4 ,they have seen so many women marry imbeciles1 or ruffians1 or incipient sots1 or life-time incapables1 or magnificent nothings1 or men who before marriage were angelic and afterward diabolic1 that they have been alarmed and stood back4 ,they saw so many boats go into the maelstrom that they steered into other waters4 ,better for a woman to live alone1 though she live a thousand years1 than to be annexed to one of these masculine failures with which society is surfeited4 ,the patron saint of almost every family circle is some such unmarried woman1 and among all the families of cousins she moves around1 and her coming in each house is the morning1 and her going away is the night4 ,a ,,beneficent ,,spinsterhood4 ,in my large circle of kindred1 perhaps twenty families in all1 it was an ,aunt ,phoebe4 ,paul gave a letter of introduction to one whom he calls ,phoebe1 our sister1 as she went up from ,cenchrea to ,rome1 commending her for her kindness and ,christian service1 and imploring for her all courtesies4 ,i think ,aunt ,phoebe was named after her4 ,was there a sickness in any of the households1 she was there ready to sit up and count out the drops of medicine4 ,was there a marriage1 she helped deck the bride for the altar4 ,was there a new soul incarnated1 she was there to rejoice at the nativity4 ,was there a sore bereavement she was there to console4 ,the children1 rushed out at her first appearance1 crying1 ,here comes ,aunt ,phoebe1 and but for parental interference they would have pulled her down with their caresses--for she was not very strong1 and many severe illnesses had given her enough glimpses of the next world to make her heavenly-minded4 ,her table was loaded up with ,baxter's ,saints' ,rest1 ,doddridge's ,rise and ,progress1 and ,jay's ,morning and ,evening ,exercises1 and ,john ,bunyan's ,pilgrim's ,progress1 and like books1 which have fitted out whole generations for the heaven upon which they have already entered4 ,a ,,glimpse ,,of ,,heaven4 ,de ,witt1 she said to me one day1 twice in my life ,i have been so overwhelmed with the love of ,god that ,i fainted away and could hardly be resuscitated4 ,don't tell me there is no heaven4 ,i have seen it twice4 ,if you would know how her presence would soothe an anxiety1 or lift a burden1 or cheer a sorrow1 or leave a blessing on every room in the house1 ask any of the ,talmages4 ,she had tarried at her early home1 taking care of an invalid father1 until the bloom of life had somewhat faded2 but she could interest the young folks with some three or four tender passages in her own history1 so that we all knew that it was not through lack of opportunity that she was not the queen of one household1 instead of being a benediction on a whole circle of households4 ,at about seventy years of age she made her last visit to my house1 and when she sat in my ,philadelphia church ,i was more embarrassed at her presence than by all the audience1 because ,i felt that in religion ,i had got no further than the ,a ,b ,c1 while she had learned the whole alphabet1 and for many years had finished the ,y and ,z4 ,when she went out of this life into the next1 what a shout there must have been in heaven1 from the front door clear up to the back seat in the highest gallery6 ,i saw the other day in the village cemetery of ,somerville1 ,n4,j41 her resting-place1 the tombstone having on it the words which thirty years ago she told me she would like to have inscribed there1 namely3 ,the ,morning ,cometh4 ,,illustrious ,,spinsters4 ,had she a mission in the world8 ,certainly4 ,as much as ,caroline ,herschel1 first amanuensis for her illustrious brother1 and then his assistant in astronomical calculations1 and then discovering worlds for herself1 dying at ninety-eight years of age1 still busy with the stars till she sped beyond them2 as much as had ,florence ,nightingale1 the nurse of the ,crimea2 or ,grace ,darling1 the oarswoman of the ,long ,stone ,lighthouse2 or ,mary ,lyon1 the teacher of ,mount ,holyoke ,female ,seminary2 or ,hannah ,more1 the ,christian authoress of ,england2 or ,dorothea ,dix1 the angel of mercy for the insane2 or ,anna ,etheridge1 among the wounded of ,blackburn's ,fort2 or ,margaret ,breckenridge1 at ,vicksburg2 or ,mary ,shelton1 distributing roses and grapes and cologne in western hospital2 or thousands of other glorious women like them1 who never took the marriage sacrament4 ,appreciate all this1 my sister1 and it will make you deliberate before you rush out of the single state into another1 unless you are sure of betterment4 ,a ,,difficult ,,business4 ,deliberate and pray4 ,pray and deliberate4 ,as ,i showed you in my former sermon1 a man ought to supplicate ,divine guidance in such a crisis2 how much more important that you solicit it6 ,it is easier for a man to find an appropriate wife than for a woman to find a good husband4 ,this is a matter of arithmetic1 as ,i showed in former discourse4 ,statistics show that in ,massachusetts and ,new ,york ,states women have a majority of hundreds of thousands4 ,why this is we leave others to surmise4 ,it would seem that woman is a favorite with the ,lord1 and that therefore ,he has made more of that kind4 ,from the order of the creation in paradise it is evident that woman is an improved edition of man4 ,but whatever be the reason for it1 the fact is certain that she who selects a husband has a smaller number of people to select from than he who selects a wife4 ,therefore a woman ought to be especially careful in her choice of life-time companionship4 ,she cannot afford to make a mistake4 ,if a man err in his selection he can spend his evenings at the club1 and dull his sensibilities by tobacco-smoke2 but woman has no club-room for refuge1 and would find it difficult to habituate herself to cigars4 ,if a woman make a bad job of marital selection1 the probability is that nothing but a funeral can relieve it4 ,divorce cases in court may interest the public1 but the love-letters of a married couple are poor reading1 except for those who write them4 ,pray ,god that you be delivered from irrevocable mistake6 ,,partners ,,to ,,avoid4 ,avoid affiance with a despiser of the ,christian religion1 whatever else he may have or may not have4 ,i do not say he must needs be a religious man1 for ,paul says the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife2 but marriage with a man who hates the ,christian religion will insure you a life of wretchedness4 ,he will caricature your habit of kneeling in prayer4 ,he will speak depreciatingly of ,christ4 ,he will wound all the most sacred feelings of your soul4 ,he will put your home under the anathema of the ,lord ,god ,almighty4 ,in addition to the anguish with which he will fill your life1 there is great danger that he will despoil your hope of heaven1 and make your marriage relation an infinite and eternal disaster4 ,if you have made such engagement1 your first duty is to break it4 ,my word may come just in time to save your soul4 ,,husbands ,,seldom ,,reform4 ,further1 do not unite in marriage with a man of bad habits in the idea of reforming him4 ,if now1 under the restraint of your present acquaintance1 he will not give up his bad habits1 after he has won the prize you cannot expect him to do so4 ,you might as well plant a violet in the face of a northeast storm with the idea of appeasing it4 ,you might as well run a schooner alongside of a burning ship with the idea of saving the ship4 ,the consequence will be1 schooner and ship will be destroyed together4 ,the almshouse could tell the story of a hundred women who married men to reform them4 ,if by twenty-five years of age a man has been grappled by intoxicants1 he is under such headway that your attempt to stop him would be very much like running up the track with a wheelbarrow to stop a ,hudson ,river express train4 ,what you call an inebriate nowadays is not a victim to wine or whiskey1 but to logwood and strychnine and nux vomica4 ,all these poisons have kindled their fires in his tongue and brain1 and all the tears of a wife weeping cannot extinguish the flames4 ,instead of marrying a man to reform him1 let him reform first1 and then give him time to see whether the reform is to be permanent4 ,let him understand that if he cannot do without his bad habits for two years he must do without you forever4 ,,men ,,wedded ,,to ,,the ,,world4 ,avoid union with one supremely selfish1 or so wound up in his occupation that he has no room for another4 ,you occasionally find a man who spreads himself so widely over the path of life that there is no room for any one to walk beside him4 ,he is not the one blade of the scissors incomplete without the other blade1 but he is a chisel made to cut his way through life alone1 or a file full of roughness1 made to be drawn across society without any affinity for other files4 ,his disposition is a lifelong protest against marriage4 ,others are so married to their occupation or profession that the taking of any other bride is a case of bigamy4 ,there are men as severely tied to their literary work as was ,chatterton1 whose essay was not printed because of the death of the ,lord ,mayor4 ,chatterton made out the following account3 ,lost by the ,lord ,mayor's death in this essay one pound eleven shillings and six-pence4 ,gained in elegies and essays five pounds and five shillings4 ,then he put what he had gained by the ,lord ,mayor's death opposite to what he had lost1 and wrote under it3 ,and glad he is dead by three pounds thirteen shillings and six-pence4 ,when a man is as hopelessly literary as that he ought to be a perpetual celibate2 his library1 his laboratory1 his books are all the companionship needed4 ,indeed1 some of the mightiest men this world ever saw have not patronized matrimony4 ,cowper1 ,pope1 ,newton1 ,swift1 ,locke1 ,walpole1 ,gibbon1 ,hume1 ,arbuthnot1 were single4 ,some of these marriage would have helped4 ,the right kind of a wife would have cured ,cowper's gloom1 and given to ,newton more practicability1 and been a relief to ,locke's overtasked brain4 ,a ,christian wife might have converted ,hume and ,gibbon to a belief in ,christianity4 ,but ,dean ,swift did not deserve a wife1 from the way in which he broke the heart of ,jane ,waring first1 and ,esther ,johnson afterward1 and last of all ,vanessa4 ,the great wit of the day1 he was outwitted by his own cruelties4 ,,predestination ,,in ,,marriage4 ,amid so many possibilities of fatal mistake1 am ,i not right in urging you to seek the unerring wisdom of ,god1 and before you are infatuated8 ,because most marriages are fit to be made convinces us that they are divinely arranged4 ,almost every cradle has an affinity toward some other cradle4 ,they may be on the opposite sides of the earth1 but one child gets out of this cradle1 and another child gets out of that cradle1 and with their first steps they start for each other4 ,they may diverge from the straight path1 going toward the ,north1 or ,south1 or ,east1 or ,west4 ,they may fall down1 but the two rise facing each other4 ,they are approaching all through infancy4 ,the one all through the years of boyhood is going to meet the one who is coming through all the years of girlhood to meet him4 ,the decision of parents as to what is best concerning them1 and the changes of fortune1 may for a time seem to arrest ,,the ,,two ,,journeys2 but on they go4 ,they may never have seen each other4 ,but the two pilgrims who started at the two cradles are nearing4 ,after eighteen1 twenty1 or thirty years1 the two come within sight4 ,at the first glance they may feel a dislike1 and they may slacken their step2 yet something that the world calls fate1 and that religion calls ,providence1 urges them on and on4 ,they must meet4 ,they come near enough to join hands in social acquaintance1 after awhile to join hands in friendship1 after awhile to join hearts4 ,the delegate from the one cradle comes up the east aisle of the church with her father4 ,the delegate from the other cradle comes up the west aisle of the church4 ,the two long journeys end at the snow-drift of the bridal veil4 ,the two chains made out of many years are forged together by the golden link which the groom puts upon the third finger of the left hand4 ,one on earth1 may they be one in heaven6 ,but there are so many exceptions to the general rule of natural affinity that only those are safe who pray for a heavenly hand to lead them4 ,because they depended on themselves and not on ,god there are thousands of women every year going to the slaughter4 ,in ,india women leap on the funeral pyre of a dead husband4 ,we have a worse spectacle than that in ,america--women innumerable leaping on the funeral pyre of a living husband4 ,,the ,,advertising ,,brute4 ,avoid all proposed alliances through newspaper advertisements4 ,many women1 just for fun1 have answered such advertisements1 and have been led on from step to step to catastrophe infinite4 ,all the men who write such advertisements are villains and lepers--all1 without a single exception4 ,all6 ,all6 ,do you answer them just for fun8 ,i will tell you a safer and healthier fun4 ,thrust your hand through the cage at a menagerie1 and stroke the back of a cobra from the ,east ,indies4 ,put your head in the mouth of a ,numidian lion1 to see if he will bite4 ,take a glassful of ,paris green mixed with some delightful henbane4 ,these are safer and healthier fun than answering newspaper advertisements for a wife4 ,,marry ,,independent ,,men4 ,my advice is3 ,marry a man who is a fortune in himself4 ,houses1 lands1 and large inheritance are well enough1 but the wheel of fortune turns so rapidly that through some investment all these in a few years may be gone4 ,there are some things1 however1 that are a perpetual fortune--good manners1 geniality of soul1 kindness1 intelligence1 sympathy1 courage1 perseverance1 industry1 and whole-heartedness4 ,marry such a one and you have married a fortune1 whether he have an income now of #ej1jjj a year or an income of #ajjj4 ,a bank is secure according to its capital stock1 and not to be judged by the deposits for a day or a week4 ,a man is rich according to his sterling qualities1 and not according to the mutability of circumstances1 which may leave with him a large amount of resources to-day and withdraw them to-morrow4 ,if a man is worth nothing but money he is poor indeed4 ,if a man have upright character he is rich4 ,property may come and go1 he is independent of the markets4 ,nothing can buy him out1 nothing can sell him out4 ,he may have more money one year than another1 but his better fortunes never vacillate4 ,,avoid ,,perfect ,,men4 ,yet do not expect to find a perfect man4 ,if you find one without any faults1 incapable of mistakes1 never having guessed wrongly1 his patience never having been perturbed1 immaculate in speech1 in temper1 in habits1 do not marry him4 ,why8 ,because you would enact a swindle4 ,what would you do with a perfect man who are not perfect yourself8 ,and how dare you hitch your imperfection fast on such supernatural excellence8 ,what a companion you would make for an angel6 ,in other words1 there are no perfect men4 ,there never was but one perfect pair1 and they slipped down the banks of paradise together4 ,we occasionally find a man who says he never sins4 ,we know he lies when he says it4 ,we have had financial dealings with two or three perfect men1 and they cheated us wofully4 ,do not1 therefore1 look for an immaculate husband1 for you will not find him4 ,,plenty ,,of ,,good ,,husbands4 ,but do not become cynical on this subject4 ,society has a great multitude of grand men who know how to make home happy4 ,when they come to be husbands they evince a nobility of nature and a self-sacrificing spirit that surprise even the wife4 ,these are the men who cheerfully sit in dark and dirty business offices1 ten feet by twelve1 in summer time hard at work while the wives and daughters are off at ,saratoga1 ,mount ,desert1 or the ,white ,sulphur4 ,these are the men who1 never having had much education themselves1 have their sons at ,yale1 and ,harvard1 and ,virginia ,university4 ,these are the men who work themselves to death by fifty years of age1 and go out to ,greenwood leaving large estate and generous life-insurance provision for their families4 ,there are husbands and fathers here by the hundreds who would die for their households4 ,if outlawry should ever become dominant in our cities they would stand in their doorway1 and with their own arm would cleave down1 one by one1 fifty invaders face to face1 foot to foot1 and every stroke a demolition4 ,this is what makes an army in defence in a country fight more desperately than an army of conquest4 ,it is not so much the abstract sentiment of a flag as it is wife1 and children1 and home that turns enthusiasm into a fury4 ,the world has such men by the million1 and the homunculi that infest all our communities must not hinder women from appreciating the glory of true manhood4 ,,fidelity ,,in ,,adversity4 ,i was reading of a bridal reception4 ,the young man had brought home the choice of his heart in her elaborate and exquisite apparel4 ,as she stood in the gay drawing-room1 and amid the gay group1 the young man's eyes filled with tears of joy as he thought that she was his4 ,years passed by1 and they stood at the same parlor on another festal occasion4 ,she wore the same dress1 for business had not opened as brightly to the young husband as he expected1 and he had never been able to purchase for her another dress4 ,her face was not as bright and smooth as it had been years before1 and a careworn look had made its signature on her countenance4 ,as the husband looked at her he saw the difference between this occasion and the former1 and he went over to where she sat1 and said3 ,you remember the time when we were here before4 ,you have the same dress on4 ,circumstances have somewhat changed1 but you look to me far more beautiful than you did then4 ,there is such a thing as conjugal fidelity1 and many of you know it in your own homes4 ,but1 after all the good advice we may give you1 we come back to the golden pillar from which we started1 the tremendous truth that no one but ,god can guide you in safety about this matter that may decide your happiness for two worlds1 this and the next4 ,so1 my sister1 ,i put your case where ,naomi put that of ,ruth and ,orpah when she said3 ,the ,lord grant you that ye may find rest1 each of you in the house of her husband4 ,,the ,,wedding4 ,i imagine the hour for which you pledged your troth has arrived4 ,there is much merry-making among your young friends1 but there is an undertone of sadness in all the house4 ,your choice may have been the gladdest and the best1 and the joy of the whole round of relatives1 but when a young eaglet is about to leave the old nest1 and is preparing to put out into sunshine and storm for itself1 it feels its wings tremble somewhat4 ,so she has a good cry before leaving home1 and at the marriage father and mother always cry1 or feel like it4 ,if you think it is easy to give up a daughter in marriage1 though it be with brightest prospects1 you will think differently when the day comes4 ,to have all along watched her from infancy to girlhood1 and from girlhood to womanhood1 studious of her welfare1 her slightest illness an anxiety1 and her presence in your home an ever-increasing joy1 and then have her go away to some other home--aye1 all the redolence of orange-blossoms1 and all the chime of marriage bells1 and all the rolling of wedding march in full diapason1 and all the hilarious congratulations of your friends cannot make you forget that you are suffering a loss irreparable4 ,but you know it is all right1 and you have a remembrance of an embarkation just like it twenty-five or thirty years ago1 in which you were one of the parties2 and1 suppressing as far as possible your sadness1 you say1 ,good-bye4 ,,visit ,,the ,,old ,,home4 ,i hope that you1 the departing daughter1 will not forget to write often home2 for1 whatever betide you1 the old folks will never lose their interest in your welfare4 ,make visits to them also as often1 and stay as long as you can1 for there will be changes at the old place after awhile4 ,every time you go you will find more gray hairs on father's head and more wrinkles on mother's brow2 and after awhile you will notice that the elastic step has become decrepitude4 ,and some day one of the two pillars of your early home will fall1 and after awhile the other pillar of that home will fall1 and it will be a comfort to yourself if1 when they are gone1 you can feel that while you are faithful in your new home you never forget your old home1 and the first friends you ever had1 and those to whom you are more indebted than you ever can be to any one else except to ,god--,i mean your father and mother4 ,alexander ,pope put it in effective rhythm when he said3 ,me let the tender office long engage ,to rock the cradle of reposing age2 ,with lenient arts extend a mother's breath1 ,make languor smile1 and smooth the bed of death2 ,explore the thought1 explain the asking eye1 ,and keep awhile one parent from the sky4 ,and now ,i commend all this precious and splendid young womanhood before me to-day to the ,god who setteth the solitary in families4 ,,clandestine ,,marriage4 ,stolen waters are sweet1 and bread eaten in secret is pleasant4 ,but he knoweth not that the dead are there4--,,proverbs #i3ag1 #ah4 ,the ,garden of ,eden was a great orchard of fruit-bearing trees1 bushels and bushels of round1 ripe1 glorious fruit2 but the horticulturist and his wife having it in charge hankered for one special tree1 simply because it was forbidden1 starting a bad streak in human nature1 so that children will now sometimes do something simply because they are forbidden to do it4 ,this ,,kink ,,in ,,the ,,human ,,race is not easily unsnarled4 ,tell a company that they may look into any twenty rooms of a large house except one1 and their chief desire is to see that one1 though all the others were picture-galleries and that a garret4 ,if there were in a region of mineral springs twenty fountains1 but the proprietor had fenced in one well against the public1 the one fenced in would be the chief temptation to the visitors1 and they would rather taste of that than of the other nineteen4 ,solomon recognized this principle in the text1 and also the disaster that follows forbidden conduct1 when he said3 ,stolen waters are sweet1 and bread eaten in secret is pleasant4 ,but he knoweth not that the dead are there4 ,in this course of sermons on ,the ,wedding ,ring1 ,i this morning aim a point-blank shot at ,clandestine ,marriages and ,escapades4 ,yonder comes up through the narrows of ,new ,york harbor a ship having all the evidence of tempestuous passage3 salt water-mark reaching to the top of the smoke-stack2 mainmast1 foremast1 mizzenmast twisted off2 bulwarks knocked in2 lifeboats off the davit2 jib-sheets and lee-bowlines missing2 captain's bridge demolished2 main shaft broken2 all the pumps working to keep from sinking before they can get to wharfage4 ,that ship is the institution of ,christian marriage1 launched by the ,lord grandly from the banks of the ,euphrates1 and floating out on the seas for the admiration and happiness of all nations4 ,but free-loveism struck it from one side1 and ,mormonism struck it from another side1 and hurricanes of libertinism have struck it on all sides1 until the old ship needs repairs in every plank1 and beam1 and sail1 and bolt1 and clamp1 and transom1 and stanchion4 ,in other words1 the notions of modern society must be reconstructed on the subject of the marriage institution4 ,and when we have got it back somewhere near what it was when ,god built it in ,paradise1 the earth will be far on toward resumption of ,paradisaical conditions4 ,,deplorable ,,laxity4 ,do you ask what is the need of a course of sermons on this subject8 ,the man or woman who asks this question is either ignorant or guilty4 ,in ,new ,england1 which has been considered by many the most moral part of the ,united ,states1 there are two thousand divorces per year4 ,and in ,massachusetts1 the headquarters of steady habits1 there is one divorce to every fourteen marriages4 ,the ,state of ,maine1 considered by many almost frigid in proprieties1 has in one year four hundred and seventy-eight divorces4 ,in ,vermont swapping wives is not a rare transaction4 ,in ,connecticut there are women who boast that they have four or five times been divorced4 ,moreover1 our boasted ,protestantism is1 on this subject1 more lax than ,roman ,catholicism4 ,roman ,catholicism admits of no divorce except for the reason that ,christ admitted as a lawful reason4 ,but ,protestantism is admitting anything and everything1 and the larger the proportion of ,protestants in any part of the country1 the larger the ratio of divorce4 ,do you not then think that ,protestantism needs some toning up on this subject8 ,,growing ,,popularity4 ,aye1 when you realize that the sacred and divine institution is being caricatured and defamed by clandestine marriages and escapades all over the land1 does there not seem a call for such discussion8 ,hardly a morning or evening paper comes into your possession without reporting them1 and there are fifty of these occurrences where one is reported1 because it is the interest of all parties to hush them up4 ,the victims are1 all hours of the night1 climbing down ladders or crossing over from ,state to ,state1 that they may reach laws of greater laxity1 holding reception six months after marriage to let the public know for the first time that a half year before they were united in wedlock4 ,ministers of religion1 and justices of the peace1 and mayors of cities1 willingly joining in marriage runaways from other ,states and neighborhoods2 the coach-box and the back seat of the princely landau in flirtation2 telegrams flashing across the country for the arrest of absconded school misses1 who started off with arm full of books1 and taking rail trains to meet their affianced--in the snow-drifts of the great storm that has recently passed over the country some of them1 ,i read1 have perished--thousands of people in a marriage whose banns have never been published2 precipitated conjugality2 bigamy triumphant2 marriage a joke2 society blotched all over with a putrefaction on this subject which no one but the ,almighty ,god can arrest4 ,we admit that clandestinity and escapade are sometimes authorized and made right by parental tyranny or domestic serfdom4 ,there have been exceptional cases where parents have had a monomania in regard to their sons and daughters1 demanding their celibacy or forbidding relations every way right4 ,through absurd family ambition parents have sometimes demanded qualifications and equipment of fortune unreasonable to expect or simply impossible4 ,children are not expected to marry to please their parents1 but to please themselves4 ,given good morals1 means of a livelihood1 appropriate age and quality of social position1 and no parent has a right to prohibit a union that seems deliberate and a matter of the heart4 ,rev4 ,philip ,henry1 eminent for piety and good sense1 used to say to his children3 ,please ,god and please yourselves1 and you shall never displease me4 ,a ,,matrimonial ,,tragedy4 ,during our ,civil ,war a marriage was about to be celebrated at ,charleston1 ,s4,c41 between ,lieutenant de ,rochelle and ,miss ,anna1 the daughter of ex-,governor ,pickens4 ,as the ceremony was about to be solemnized a shell broke through the roof and wounded nine of the guests1 and the bride fell dying1 and1 wrapped in her white wedding robe1 her betrothed kneeling at her side1 in two hours she expired4 ,and there has been many as bright a union of hearts as that proposed that the bombshell of outrageous parental indignation has wounded and scattered and slain4 ,if the hand offered in marriage be blotched of intemperance2 if the life of the marital candidate has been debauched2 if he has no visible means of support1 and poverty and abandonment seem only a little way ahead2 if the twain seem entirely unmatched in disposition1 protest and forbid1 and re-enforce your opinion by that of others1 and put all lawful obstacles in the way2 but do not join that company of parents who have ruined their children by a plutocracy of domestic crankiness which has caused more than one elopement4 ,i know of a few cases where marriage has been under the red-hot anathema of parents and all the neighbors1 but ,god approved1 and the homes established have been beautiful and positively ,edenic4 ,but while we have admitted there are real cases of justifiable rebellion1 in ninety-nine cases out of a hundred--yea1 in nine hundred and ninety-nine cases out of a thousand1 these unlicensed departures and decampments by moonlight are ruin1 temporal and eternal4 ,it is safer for a woman to jump off the docks of the ,east ,river and depend on being able to swim to the other shore1 or get picked up by a ferry-boat4 ,the possibilities are that she may be rescued1 but the probability is that she will not4 ,read the story of the escapades in the newspapers for the last ten years1 and find me a half dozen that do not mean poverty1 disgrace1 abandonment1 police court1 divorce1 death1 and hell4 ,stolen waters are sweet1 and bread eaten in secret is pleasant4 ,but he knoweth not that the dead are there4 ,satan presides over the escapade4 ,he introduces the two parties to each other4 ,he gets them to pledge their troth4 ,he appoints where they shall meet4 ,he shows them where they can find officiating minister or squire4 ,he points out to them the ticket office for the rail train4 ,he puts them aboard1 and when they are going at forty miles the hour he jumps off and leaves them in the lurch2 for1 while ,satan has a genius in getting people into trouble1 he has no genius for getting people out4 ,he induced ,jonah to take ship for ,tarshish when ,god told him to go to ,nineveh1 but provided for the recreant prophet no better landing-place than the middle of the ,mediterranean ,sea4 ,,the ,,dime ,,novel4 ,the modern novel is responsible for many of these abscondings4 ,do you think that young women would sit up half a night reading novels in which the hero and heroine get acquainted in the usual way1 and carry on their increased friendliness until1 with the consent of parents1 the day of marriage is appointed1 and amid the surrounding group of kindred the vows are taken8 ,oh1 no6 ,there must be flight1 and pursuit1 and narrow escape1 and drawn dagger1 all ending in sunshine1 and parental forgiveness1 and bliss unalloyed and gorgeous4 ,in many of the cases of escapade the idea was implanted in the hot brain of the woman by a cheap novel1 ten cents' worth of unadulterated perdition4 ,,the ,,scheme ,,of ,,bad ,,men4 ,these evasions of the ordinary modes of marriage are to be deplored for the reason that nearly all of them are proposed by bad men4 ,if the man behave well he has a character to which he can refer1 and he can say3 ,if you want to inquire about me there is a list of names of people in the town or neighborhood where ,i live4 ,no2 the heroes of escapades are nearly all either bigamists1 or libertines1 or drunkards1 or defrauders1 or first-class scoundrels of some sort4 ,they have no character to lose4 ,they may be dressed in the height of fashion1 may be cologned1 and pomatumed1 and padded1 and diamond-ringed1 and flamboyant-cravatted1 until they bewitch the eye and intoxicate the olfactories2 but they are double-distilled extracts of villainy1 moral dirt and blasphemy4 ,beware of them4 ,stolen waters are sweet1 and bread eaten in secret is pleasant4 ,but he knoweth not that the dead are there4 ,,social ,,degradation4 ,fugitive marriage is to be deplored because it almost always implies woman's descent from a higher social plane to a lower4 ,if the man was not of a higher plane1 or the marriage on an equality1 there would be no objections1 and hence no inducement to clandestinity4 ,in almost all cases it means the lowering of womanhood4 ,observe this law3 a man marrying a woman beneath him in society may raise her to any eminence that he himself may reach2 but if a woman marry a man beneath her in society she always goes down to his level4 ,that is a law inexorable1 and there are no exceptions4 ,is any woman so high up that she can afford to plot for her own debasement8 ,there is not a ,state in the ,american ,union that has not for the last twenty years furnished an instance of the sudden departure of some intelligent woman from an affluent home to spend her life with some one who can make five dollars a day1 provided he keeps very busy4 ,well1 many a man has lived on five dollars a day and been happy1 but he undertakes a big contract when with five dollars a day he attempts to support some one who has lived in a home that cost twenty thousand per annum4 ,this has been about the history of most of such conjunctions of simplicity and extravagance1 the marriage of ,,ox ,,and ,,eagle4 ,the first year they get on tolerably well1 for it is odd and romantic1 and assisted by applause of people who admire outlawry4 ,the second year the couple settle down into complete dislike of each other4 ,the third year they separate and seek for divorce1 or1 as is more probable1 the man becomes a drunkard1 and the woman a blackened waif of the street4 ,stolen waters are sweet1 and bread eaten in secret is pleasant4 ,but he knoweth not that the dead are there4 ,these truant marriages are also to be deplored because in most instances they are executed in defiance of parental wisdom and kindness4 ,most parents are anxious for the best welfare of a child4 ,if they make vehement and determined opposition1 it is largely because it is a match unfit to be made1 and they can see for their daughter nothing but wretchedness in that direction4 ,they have keener and wiser appreciation1 for instance1 of the certain domestic demolition that comes from alcoholism in a young man4 ,they realize what an idiot a woman is who marries a man who has not brains or industry enough to earn a livelihood for a family4 ,no bureau of statistics can tell us the number of women who1 after marriage1 have to support themselves and their husbands4 ,if the husband becomes invalid1 it is a beautiful thing to see a wife uncomplainingly1 by needle1 or pen1 or yard-stick1 or washing-machine1 support the home4 ,but these great1 lazy masculine louts that stand around with hands in their pockets1 allowing the wife with her weak arm to fight the battle of bread1 need to be regurgitated from society4 ,,reversed ,,relations4 ,there are innumerable instances in these cities where the wife pays the rent1 and meets all the family expenses1 and furnishes the tobacco and the beer for the lord of the household4 ,no wonder parents put on all the brakes to stop such a train of disaster4 ,they have too often seen the gold ring put on the finger at the altar turning out to be the iron link of a chain of domestic servitude4 ,what a farce it is for a man who cannot support himself1 and not worth a cent in the world1 to take a ring which he purchased by money stolen from his grandmother's cupboard1 and put it on the finger of the bride1 saying3 ,with this ring ,i thee wed1 and with all my worldly goods ,i thee endow4 ,it is amazing to see how some women will marry men knowing nothing about them4 ,no merchant would sell a hundred dollars' worth of goods on credit without knowing whether the customer was worthy of being trusted4 ,no man or woman would buy a house with encumbrances of mortgages1 and liens1 and judgments against it uncancelled2 and yet there is not an hour of the day or night for the last ten years there have not been women by hasty marriage entrusting their earthly happiness to men about whose honesty they know nothing1 or who are encumbered with liens1 and judgments1 and first mortgages1 and second mortgages1 and third mortgages of evil habits4 ,no wonder that in such circumstances parents in conjugating the verb in question pass from the subjunctive mood to the indicative1 and from the indicative to the imperative4 ,in nearly all the cases of escapade that you will hear of the rest of your lives there will be a headlong leap over the barriers of parental common sense and forethought4 ,stolen waters are sweet1 and bread eaten in secret is pleasant4 ,but he knoweth not that the dead are there4 ,,involves ,,deception4 ,we also deplore these fraudulent espousals and this sneaking exchange of single life for married life because it is deception1 and that is a corroding and damning vice4 ,you must deceive your kindred1 you must deceive society1 you must deceive all but ,god1 and ,him you cannot deceive4 ,deception does not injure others so much as it injures ourselves4 ,marriage is too important a crisis in one's life to be decided by sleight of hand1 or a sort of jugglery which says3 ,presto1 change6 ,now you see her1 and now you don't4 ,better to wait for years for circumstances to improve4 ,time may remove all obstacles4 ,the candidate for marital preferences may change his habits1 or get into some trade or business that will support a home1 or the inexorable father and mother may be promoted to celestial citizenship4 ,at the right time have the day appointed4 ,stand at the end of the best room in the house with joined hands1 and minister of religion before you to challenge the world that if they know of any reason why these two persons shall not be united1 they state it now or forever hold their peace1 and then start out with the good wishes of all the neighbors and the halo of the ,divine sanction4 ,when you can go out of harbor at noon with all flags flying1 do not try to run a blockade at midnight4 ,in view of all this1 ,i charge you to break up clandestine correspondence if you are engaged in it1 and have no more clandestine meetings1 either at the ferry1 or on the street1 or at the house of mutual friends1 or at the corner of the woods4 ,do not have letters come for you to the post-office under assumed address4 ,have no correspondence that makes you uneasy lest some one by mistake open your letters4 ,do not employ terms of endearment at the beginning and close of letters unless you have a right to use them4 ,that young lady is on the edge of danger who dares not allow her mother to see her letters4 ,,confide ,,in ,,parents4 ,if you have sensible parents take them into your confidence in all the affairs of the heart4 ,they will give you more good advice in one hour than you can get from all the world beside in five years4 ,they have toiled for you so long1 and prayed for you so much1 they have your best interests at heart4 ,at the same time let parents review their opposition to a proposed marital alliance1 and see if their opposition is founded on a genuine wish for the child's welfare1 or on some whim1 or notion1 or prejudice1 or selfishness1 fighting a natural law and trying to make ,niagara run up stream4 ,william ,pitt1 the ,prime ,minister of ,england in the reign of ,george ,,iii41 was always saying wise things4 ,one day ,sir ,walter ,farquhar called on him in great perturbation4 ,mr4 ,pitt inquired what was the matter1 and ,sir ,walter told him that his daughter was about to be married to one not worthy of her rank4 ,mr4 ,pitt said3 ,is the young man of respectable family8 ,yes4 ,is he respectable in himself8 ,yes4 ,has he an estimable character8 ,yes4 ,why1 then1 my dear ,sir ,walter1 make no opposition4 ,the advice was taken1 and a happy married life ensued4 ,let ministers and officers of the law decline officiating at clandestine marriages4 ,when they are asked to date a marriage certificate back1 as we all are asked1 let them peremptorily decline to say that the ceremony was in ,november instead of ,january1 or decline to leave the date blank1 lest others fill out the record erroneously4 ,let a law be passed in all our ,states1 as it has already been in some of the ,states1 making a license from officers of the law necessary before we can unite couples1 and then make it necessary to publish beforehand in the newspapers1 as it used to be published in the ,new ,england churches1 so that if there be lawful objection it may be presented1 not swinging the buoy on the rocks after the ship has struck and gone to pieces4 ,and here it might be well for me to take all the romance out of an escapade by quoting a dozen lines of ,robert ,pollock1 the great ,scotch poet1 where he describes the crazed victim of one of these escapades3 444 ,yet had she many days ,of sorrow in the world1 but never wept4 ,she lived on alms1 and carried in her hand ,some withered stalks she gathered in the spring4 ,when any asked the cause she smiled1 and said ,they were her sisters1 and would come and watch ,her grave when she was dead4 ,she never spoke ,of her deceiver1 father1 mother1 home1 ,or child1 or heaven1 or hell1 or ,god2 but still ,in lonely places walked1 and ever gazed ,upon the withered stalks1 and talked to them2 ,till1 wasted to the shadow of her youth1 ,with woe too wide to see beyond1 she died4 ,,under ,,the ,,light4 ,but now ,i turn on this subject an intenser light4 ,we have fifteen hundred lights in this church1 and when by electric touch they are kindled in the evening service it is almost startling4 ,but this whole subject of ,clandestine ,marriages and ,escapades ,i put under a more intense light than that4 ,the headlight of a locomotive is terrible if you stand near enough to catch the full glare of it4 ,as it sweeps around the ,horseshoe ,curve of the ,alleghanies or along the edges of the ,sierra ,nevadas1 how far ahead1 and how deep down1 and how high up it flashes1 and there is instantaneous revelation of mountain peak and wild beasts hieing themselves to their caverns and cascades a thousand feet tall1 or clinging in white terror to the precipices6 ,but more intense1 more far-reaching1 more sudden1 swifter and more tremendous is the headlight of an advancing ,judgment ,day1 under which all the most hidden affairs of life shall come to discovery and arraignment4 ,i quote an overwhelming passage of ,scripture1 in which ,i put the whole emphasis on the word secret4 ,god shall bring every work into judgment1 with every secret thing1 whether it be good or evil4 ,what a time that will be in which the cover shall be lifted from every home and from every heart4 ,the iniquity may have been so sly that it escaped all human detection1 but it will be as well known on that day as the crimes of ,sodom and ,gomorrah1 unless for ,christ's sake it has been forgiven4 ,all the fingers of universal condemnation will be pointed at it4 ,the archangel of wrath will stand there with uplifted thunderbolt ready to strike it4 ,the squeamishness and prudery of earthly society1 which hardly allowed some sins to be mentioned on earth1 are past1 and the man who was unclean and the woman who was impure will1 under a light brighter than a thousand noonday suns1 stand with the whole story written on scalp1 and forehead1 and cheek1 and hands1 and feet2 the whole resurrection body aflame and dripping with fiery disclosures1 ten thousand sepulchral and celestial and infernal voices crying1 ,unclean6 ,unclean6 ,unclean6 ,all marital intrigues and all secret iniquities will be published1 as though all the trumpets spoke them1 and all the lightnings capitalized them1 and all the earthquakes rumbled them4 ,oh1 man1 recreant to thy marriage vow6 ,oh1 woman1 in sinful collusion6 ,what1 then1 will become of thy poor soul8 ,the tumbling ,alps1 and ,pyrenees1 and ,mount ,washingtons cannot hide thee from the consequences of thy secret sins4 ,better repent of them now1 so that they cannot be brought against thee4 ,for the chief of sinners there is pardon1 if you ask it in time4 ,but ,i leave you to guess what chance there will be for those who on earth lived in clandestine relations1 when on that day the very ,christ who had such high appreciation of the marriage relation that ,he compared it to ,his own relation with the ,church1 shall appear at the door of the great hall of the ,last ,assize1 and all the multitudes of earth1 and hell1 and heaven shall rise up and cry out from the three galleries3 ,behold1 the bridegroom cometh6 ,,duties ,,of ,,husbands ,,to ,,wives4 ,and ,isaac went out to meditate in the field at eventide3 and he lifted up his eyes1 and saw1 and1 behold1 the camels were coming4--,,genesis #bd3fc4 ,a bridal pageant on the back of dromedaries6 ,the camel is called the ship of the desert4 ,its swinging motion in the distance is suggestive of a vessel rising and falling with the billows4 ,though awkward1 how imposing these creatures as they move along1 whether in ancient or modern times1 sometimes carrying four hundred or four thousand travelers from ,bagdad to ,aleppo1 or from ,bassora to ,damascus6 ,in my text comes a caravan4 ,we notice the noiseless step of the broad foot1 the velocity of motion1 the gay caparison of saddle1 and girth1 and awning1 sheltering the riders from the sun1 and the hilarity of the mounted passengers1 and we cry out3 ,who are they8 ,well1 ,isaac has been praying for a wife1 and it is time he had one1 for he is forty years of age2 and his servant1 directed by the ,lord1 has made a selection of ,rebekah2 and1 with her companions and maidens1 she is on her way to her new home1 carrying with her the blessing of all her friends4 ,,the ,,nuptial ,,meeting4 ,isaac is in the fields1 meditating upon his proposed passage from celibacy to monogamy4 ,and he sees a speck against the sky1 then groups of people1 and after a while he finds that the grandest earthly blessing that ever comes to a man is approaching with this gay caravan4 ,in this my discourse on ,the ,wedding ,ring1 having spoken of the choice of a lifetime companion1 ,i take it for granted1 ,o man1 that your marriage was divinely arranged1 and that the camels have arrived from the right direction and at the right time1 bringing the one that was intended for your consort--a ,rebekah and not a ,jezebel4 ,i proceed to discuss as to how you ought to treat your wife1 and my ambition is to tell you more plain truth than you ever heard in any three-quarters of an hour in all your life4 ,,the ,,responsibility ,,undertaken4 ,first of all1 ,i charge you realize your responsibility in having taken her from the custody and care and homestead in which she was once sheltered4 ,what courage you must have had1 and what confidence in yourself1 to say to her practically3 ,i will be to you more than your father and mother1 more than all the friends you ever had or ever can have6 ,give up everything and take me4 ,i feel competent to see you through life in safety4 ,you are an immortal being1 but ,i am competent to defend you and make you happy4 ,however bright and comfortable a home you have now1 and though in one of the rooms is the arm-chair in which you rocked1 and in the garret is the cradle in which you were hushed and the trundle-bed in which you slept1 and in the sitting-room are the father and mother who have got wrinkle-faced1 and stoop-shouldered1 and dim-eyesighted in taking care of you1 yet you will do better to come with me4 ,i am amazed that any of us ever had the sublimity of impudence to ask such a transfer from a home assured to a home conjectured and unbuilt4 ,a ,,risky ,,voyage4 ,you would think me a very daring and hazardous adventurer if ,i should go down to one of the piers on the ,north ,river1 and at a time when there was a great lack of ship captains1 and ,i should1 with no knowledge of navigation1 propose to take a steamer across to ,glasgow or ,havre1 and say3 ,all aboard6 ,haul in the planks and swing out1 and1 passing out into the sea1 plunge through darkness and storm4 ,if ,i succeeded in getting charge of a ship1 it would be one that would never be heard of again4 ,but that is the boldness of every man that proffers marriage4 ,he says3 ,i will navigate you through the storms1 the cyclones1 the fogs of a lifetime4 ,i will run clear of rocks and icebergs4 ,i have no experience and ,i have no seaport1 but all aboard for the voyage of a lifetime6 ,i admit that there have been ten thousand shipwrecks on this very route1 but don't hesitate6 ,tut6 ,tut6 ,there now6 ,don't cry6 ,brides must not cry at the wedding4 ,,the ,,wife',s ,,temerity4 ,in response to this the woman1 by her action1 practically says3 ,i have but one life to live1 and ,i entrust it all to you4 ,my arm is weak1 but ,i will depend on the strength of yours4 ,i don't know much of the world1 but ,i rely on your wisdom4 ,i put my body1 my mind1 my soul1 my time1 my eternity1 in your keeping4 ,i make no reserve4 ,even my name ,i resign and take yours1 though mine is a name that suggests all that was honorable in my father1 and all that was good in my mother1 and all that was pleasant in my brothers and sisters4 ,i start with you on a journey which shall not part except at the edge of your grave or mine4 ,ruth1 the ,moabitess1 made no more thorough self-abnegation than ,i make1 when ,i take her tremendous words1 the pathos of which many centuries have not cooled3 ,entreat me not to leave thee1 or to return from following after thee2 for whither thou goest1 ,i will go1 and where thou lodgest1 ,i will lodge4 ,thy people shall be my people1 and thy ,god my ,god4 ,where thou diest will ,i die1 and there will ,i be buried4 ,the ,lord do so to me and more also1 if aught but death part thee and me4' ,side by side in life4 ,side by side in the burying-ground4 ,side by side in heaven4 ,before ,god and man1 and with my immortal soul in the oath1 ,i swear eternal fidelity4 ,,entitled ,,to ,,admiration4 ,now1 my brother1 how ought you to treat her8 ,unless you are an ingrate infinite you will treat her well4 ,you will treat her better than any one in the universe except your ,god4 ,her name will have in it more music than in all that ,chopin1 or ,bach1 or ,rheinberger composed4 ,her eyes1 swollen with three weeks of night watching over a child with scarlet fever1 will be to you beautiful as a ,may morning4 ,after the last rose petal has dropped out of her cheek1 after the last feather of the raven's wing has fallen from her hair1 after across her forehead1 and under her eyes1 and across her face there are as many wrinkles as there are graves over which she has wept1 you will be able truthfully to say1 in the words of ,solomon's song3 ,behold1 thou art fair1 my love6 ,behold1 thou art fair6 ,and perhaps she may respond appropriately in the words that no one but the matchless ,robert ,burns could ever have found pen or ink1 or heart or brain to write3 ,john ,anderson1 my jo1 ,john1 ,we clamb the hill thegither2 ,and mony a canty day1 ,john1 ,we've had wi' ane anither4 ,now we maun totter down1 ,john1 ,but hand in hand we'll go2 ,and sleep thegither at the foot1 ,john ,anderson1 my jo4 ,if any one assail her good name1 you will have hard work to control your temper1 and if you should strike him down the sin will not be unpardonable4 ,by as complete a surrender as the universe ever saw--except that of the ,son of ,god for your salvation and mine--she has a first mortgage on your body1 mind and soul1 and the mortgage is foreclosed2 and you do not more thoroughly own your two eyes or your two hands than she owns you4 ,the longer the journey ,rebekah makes and the greater the risks of her expedition on the back of the camels1 the more thoroughly is ,isaac bound to be kind1 and indulgent1 and worthy4 ,,lovers' ,,promises ,,binding4 ,now1 be honest and pay your debts4 ,you promised to make her happy4 ,are you making her happy8 ,you are an honest man in other things1 and feel the importance of keeping a contract4 ,if you have induced her into a conjugal partnership under certain pledges of kindness and valuable attention1 and then have failed to fulfill your word1 you deserve to have a suit brought against you for getting goods under false pretences1 and then you ought to be mulcted in a large amount of damages4 ,review now all the fine1 beautiful1 complimentary1 gracious and glorious things you promised her before marriage and reflect whether you have kept your faith4 ,do you say1 ,oh1 that was all sentimentalism1 and romance1 and a joke1 and that they all talk that way6 ,well1 let that plan be tried on yourself6 ,suppose ,i am interested in ,western lands1 and ,i fill your mind with roseate speculation1 and ,i tell you that a city is already laid out on the farm that ,i propose to sell you1 and that a new railroad will run close by1 and have a depot for easy transportation of the crops1 and that eight or ten capitalists are going to put up fine residences close by1 and that the climate is delicious1 and that the ground1 high up1 gives no room for malaria1 and that every dollar planted will grow up into a bush bearing ten or twenty dollars1 and my speech glows with enthusiasm until you rush off with me to an attorney to have the deed drawn1 and the money paid down1 and the bargain completed4 ,you can hardly sleep nights because of the ,el ,dorado1 the ,elysium1 upon which you are soon to enter4 ,a ,,western ,,eden4 ,you give up your home at the ,east1 you bid good-bye to your old neighbors1 and take the train1 and after many days' journey you arrive at a quiet depot1 from which you take a wagon thirty miles through the wilderness1 and reach your new place4 ,you see a man seated on a wet log1 in a swamp1 and shaking with the fifteenth attack of chills and fever1 and ask him who he is4 ,he says3 ,i am a real estate agent1 having in charge the property around here4 ,you ask him where the new depot is4 ,he tells you that it has not yet been built1 but no doubt will be if the company get their bill for the track through the next legislature4 ,you ask him where the new city is laid out4 ,he says1 with chattering teeth3 ,if you will wait till this chill is off1 ,i will show it to you on the map ,i have in my pocket4 ,you ask him where the capitalists are going to build their fine houses1 and he says3 ,somewhere along those lowlands out there by those woods1 when the water has been drained off4 ,that night you sleep in the hut of the real estate agent1 and though you pray for everybody else1 you do not pray for me4 ,being more fortunate than many men who go out in such circumstances1 you have money enough to get back1 and you come to me1 and out of breath in your indignation1 you say3 ,you have swindled me out of everything4 ,what do you mean in deceiving me about that ,western property8 ,oh1 ,i reply1 that was all right2 that was sentimentalism1 and romance1 and a joke4 ,that's the way they all talk6 ,but more excusable would ,i be in such deception than you1 ,o man1 who by glow of words and personal magnetism induced a womanly soul into surroundings which you have taken no care to make attractive1 so that she exchanged her father's house for the dismal swamp of married experience--treeless1 flowerless1 shelterless1 comfortless and godless4 ,i would not be half so much to blame in cheating you out of a farm as you in cheating a woman out of the happiness of a lifetime4 ,,lovers' ,,attentions4 ,my brother1 do not get mad at what ,i say1 but honestly compare the promises you made1 and see whether you have kept them4 ,some of you spent every evening of the week with your betrothed before marriage1 and since then you spent every evening away1 except you have influenza or some sickness on account of which the doctor says you must not go out4 ,you used to fill your conversation with interjections of adulation1 and now you think it sounds silly to praise the one who ought to be more attractive to you as the years go by1 and life grows in severity of struggle and becomes more sacred by the baptism of tears--tears over losses1 tears over graves4 ,compare the way some of you used to come in the house in the evening1 when you were attempting the capture of her affections1 and the way some of you come into the house in the evening now4 ,,don',t ,,be ,,preoccupied4 ,then what politeness1 what distillation of smiles1 what graciousness1 sweet as the peach orchard in blossom week6 ,now1 some of you come in and put your hat on the rack and scowl1 and say3 ,lost money to-day6 and you sit down at the table and criticise the way the food is cooked4 ,you shove back before the others are done eating1 and snatch up the evening paper and read1 oblivious of what has been going on in that home all day4 ,the children are in awe before the domestic autocrat4 ,bubbling over with fun1 yet they must be quiet2 with healthful curiosity1 yet they must ask no questions4 ,the wife has had enough annoyances in the nursery1 and parlor1 and kitchen to fill her nerves with nettles and spikes4 ,as you have provided the money for food and wardrobe1 you feel you have done all required of you4 ,toward the good cheer1 and the intelligent improvement1 and the moral entertainment of that home1 which at the longest can last but a few years1 you are doing nothing4 ,you seem to have no realization of the fact that soon these children will be grown up or in their sepulchres1 and will be far removed from your influence1 and that the wife will soon end her earthly mission1 and that house will be occupied by others1 and you yourself will be gone4 ,gentlemen1 fulfill your contracts4 ,christian marriage is an affectional bargain4 ,in heathen lands a man wins his wife by achievements4 ,in some countries wives are bought by the payment of so many dollars1 as so many cattle or sheep4 ,in one country the man gets on a horse and rides down where a group of women are standing1 and seizes one of them by the hair1 and lifts her1 struggling and resisting1 on his horse1 and if her brothers and friends do not overtake her before she gets to the jungle1 she is his lawful wife4 ,in another land the masculine candidate for marriage is beaten by the club of the one whom he would make his bride4 ,if he cries out under the pounding1 he is rejected4 ,if he receives the blows uncomplainingly1 she is his by right4 ,endurance1 and bravery1 and skill decide the marriage in barbarous lands1 but ,christian marriage is a voluntary bargain1 in which you promise protection1 support1 companionship and love4 ,,the ,,terms ,,of ,,the ,,contract4 ,business men have in their fire-proof safes a file of papers containing their contracts1 and sometimes they take them out and read them over to see what the party of the first part and the party of the second part really bound themselves to do4 ,different ministers of religion have their own peculiar forms of marriage ceremony2 but if you have forgotten what you promised at the altar of wedlock1 you had better buy or borrow an ,episcopal ,church-,service1 which contains the substance of all intelligent marriage ceremonies1 when it says3 ,i take thee to be my wedded wife1 to have and to hold from this day forward1 for better or for worse1 for richer or for poorer1 in sickness and in health1 to love and to cherish till death us do part1 according to ,god's holy ordinance1 and thereto ,i pledge thee my troth4 ,would it not be a good idea to have that printed in tract form and widely distributed8 ,,never ,,flirt4 ,the fact is1 that many men are more kind to everybody else's wives than to their own wives4 ,they will let the wife carry a heavy coal scuttle upstairs1 and will at one bound clear the width of a parlor to pick up some other lady's pocket-handkerchief4 ,there is an evil which ,i have seen under the sun1 and it is common among men--namely1 husbands in flirtation4 ,the attention they ought to put upon their own wives they bestow upon others4 ,they smile on them coyly and askance1 and with a manner that seems to say3 ,i wish ,i was free from that old drudge at home4 ,what an improvement you would be on my present surroundings6 ,and bouquets are sent1 and accidental meetings take place1 and late at night the man comes to his prosaic home1 whistling and hilarious1 and wonders that the wife is jealous4 ,there are thousands of men who1 while not positively immoral1 need radical correction of their habits in this direction4 ,it is meanness immeasurable for a man by his behavior to seem to say to his wife3 ,you can't help yourself1 and ,i will go where ,i please1 and admire whom ,i please1 and ,i defy your criticism4 ,why did you not have that put in the bond1 ,o domestic ,shylock8 ,why did you not have it understood before you were pronounced husband and wife that she should have only a part of the dividend of your affections2 that when1 as time rolled on and the cares of life had erased some of the bright lines from her face1 and given unwieldiness to her form1 you would have the reserved right to pay obeisance to cheeks more rubicund1 and figure lither and more agile1 and as you demanded the last pound of patience and endurance on her part you could1 with the emphasis of an ,edwin ,forrest or a ,macready1 have tapped the eccentric marriage document and have said3 ,it's in the bond6 ,if this modern ,rebekah had understood beforehand where she was alighting she would have ordered the camel drivers to turn the caravan backward toward ,padan-aram4 ,flirtation has its origin either in dishonesty or licentiousness4 ,the married man who indulges in it is either a fraud or a rake4 ,however high up in society such a one may be1 and however sought after1 ,i would not give a three-cent piece1 though it had been three times clipped1 for the virtue of the masculine flirt4 ,,tone ,,up4 ,the most worthy thing for the thousands of married men to do is to go home and apologize for past neglects and brighten up their old love4 ,take up the family ,bible and read the record of the marriage day4 ,open the drawer of relics in the box inside the drawer containing the trinkets of your dead child4 ,take up the pack of yellow-colored letters that were written before you became one4 ,rehearse the scenes of joy and sorrow in which you have mingled4 ,put all these things as fuel on the altar1 and by a coal of sacred fire rekindle the extinguished light4 ,it was a blast from hell that blew it out1 and a gale from heaven will fan it into a blaze4 ,ye who have broken marriage vows1 speak out6 take your wife into all your plans1 your successes1 your defeats1 your ambitions4 ,tell her everything4 ,walk arm in arm with her into places of amusement1 and on the piazza of summer watering places1 and up the rugged way of life1 and down through dark ravine1 and when one trembles on the way let the other be re-enforcement4 ,in no case pass yourself off as a single man1 practicing gallantries4 ,do not1 after you are fifty years of age1 in ladies' society1 try to look young-mannish4 ,,respect ,,her ,,piety4 ,interfere not with your wife's religious nature4 ,put her not in that awful dilemma in which so many ,christian wives are placed by their husbands1 who ask them to go to places or do things which compel them to decide between loyalty to ,god and loyalty to the husband4 ,rather than ask her to compromise her ,christian character encourage her to be more and more a ,christian1 for there will be times in your life when you will want the help of all her ,christian resources2 and certainly1 when you remember how much influence your mother had over you1 you do not want the mother of your children to set a less gracious example4 ,it pleases me greatly to hear the unconverted and worldly husband say about his wife1 with no idea that it will get to her ears3 ,there is the most godly woman alive4 ,her goodness is a perpetual rebuke to my waywardness4 ,nothing on earth could ever induce her to do a wrong thing4 ,i hope the children will take after her instead of after me4 ,if there is any heaven at all ,i am sure she will go there4 ,,the ,,priest ,,of ,,the ,,household4 ,ay1 my brother1 do you not think it would be a wise and a safe thing for you to join her on the road to heaven8 ,you think you have a happy home now1 but what a home you would have if you both were religious6 ,what a new sacredness it would give to your marital relation1 and what a new light it would throw on the forehead of your children6 ,in sickness1 what a comfort6 ,in reverses of fortune1 what a wealth6 ,in death1 what a triumph6 ,god meant you to be the high priest of your household4 ,go home to-day and take the ,bible on your lap1 and gather all your family yet living around you1 and those not living will hear of it in a flash1 and as ministering spirits will hover--father and mother and children gone1 and all your celestial kindred4 ,then kneel down1 and if you can't think of a prayer to offer ,i will give you a prayer--namely3 ,lord ,god1 ,i surrender to ,thee myself and my beloved wife1 and these dear children4 ,for ,christ's sake forgive all the past and help us for all the future4 ,we have lived together here1 may we live together forever4 ,amen and amen4 ,dear me1 what a stir it would make among your best friends on earth and in heaven4 ,a ,,husband ,,imprisoned4 ,joseph the ,second1 the ,emperor1 was so kind and so philanthropic that he excited the unbounded love of most of his subjects4 ,he abolished serfdom1 established toleration and lived in the happiness of his people4 ,one day while on his way to ,ostend to declare it a free port1 and while at the head of a great procession1 he saw a woman at the door of her cottage in dejection4 ,the ,emperor dismounted and asked the cause of her grief4 ,she said that her husband had gone to ,ostend to see the ,emperor1 and had declined to take her with him2 for1 as he was an alien1 he could not understand her loyal enthusiasm1 and that it was the one great desire of her life to see the ruler for whose kindness and goodness and greatness she had an unspeakable admiration2 and her disappointment in not being able to go and see him was simply unbearable4 ,the ,emperor ,joseph took from his pocket a box decorated with diamonds surrounding a picture of himself and presented it to her1 and when the picture revealed to whom she was talking she knelt in reverence and clapped her hands in gladness before him4 ,the ,emperor took the name of her husband and the probable place where he might be found at ,ostend1 and had him imprisoned for the three days of the ,emperor's visit1 so that the husband returning home found that the wife had seen the ,emperor while he had not seen him4 ,in many families of this earth the wife1 through the converting grace of ,god1 has seen the ,king in ,his beauty1 and ,he has conferred upon her the pearl of great price1 while the husband is an alien from the covenant of promise1 without ,god and without hope in the world1 and imprisoned in worldliness and sin4 ,oh1 that they might arm in arm go this day and see ,him1 who is not only greater and lovelier than any ,joseph of earthly dominion1 but high over all1 in earth1 and air1 and sky6 ,his touch is life4 ,his voice is music4 ,his smile is heaven4 ,,duties ,,of ,,wives ,,to ,,husbands4 ,the name of his wife was ,abigail2 and she was a woman of good understanding and of a beautiful countenance4--#a ,,samuel #be3c4 ,the ground in ,carmel is white1 not with fallen snow1 but the wool from the backs of three thousand sheep1 for they are being sheared4 ,and ,i hear the grinding of the iron blades together1 and the bleating of the flocks1 held between the knees of the shearers1 while the clipping goes on1 and the rustic laughter of the workmen4 ,nabal and his wife ,abigail preside over this homestead4 ,david1 the warrior1 sends a delegation to apply for aid at this prosperous time of sheep-shearing1 and ,nabal peremptorily declines his request4 ,revenge is the cry4 ,yonder over the rocks come ,david and four hundred angry men with one stroke to demolish ,nabal and his sheepfolds and vineyards4 ,the regiment marches in double quick1 and the stones of the mountain loosen and roll down1 as the soldiers strike them with their swift feet1 and the cry of the commander is ,forward6 ,forward6 ,a ,,fair ,,propitiator4 ,abigail1 to save her husband and his property1 hastens to the foot of the hill4 ,she is armed1 not with sword or spear1 but with her own beauty and self-sacrifice1 and when ,david sees her kneeling at the base of the craig1 he cries3 ,halt6 ,halt6 and the caverns echo it3 ,halt6 ,halt6 ,abigail is the conqueress6 ,one woman in the right mightier than four hundred men in the wrong6 ,a hurricane stopped at the sight of a water-lily6 ,a dewdrop dashed back ,niagara6 ,by her prowess and tact she has saved her husband1 and saved her home1 and put before all ages an illustrious specimen of what a wife can do if she be godly1 and prudent1 and self-sacrificing1 and vigilant1 and devoted to the interests of her husband1 and attractive4 ,as1 ,sabbath before last1 ,i took the responsibility of telling husbands how they ought to treat their wives--and1 though ,i noticed that some of the men squirmed a little in their pew1 they endured it well--,i now take the responsibility of telling how wives ought to treat their husbands4 ,i hope your domestic alliance was so happily formed that while married life may have revealed in him some frailties that you did not suspect1 it has also displayed excellencies that more than overbalanced them4 ,i suppose that if ,i could look into the heart of a hundred wives here present and ask them where is the kindest and best man they know of1 and they dared speak out1 ninety-nine out of a hundred of them would say3 ,at the other end of this pew4 ,,abigail',s ,,bad ,,bargain4 ,i hope1 my sister1 you have married a man as ,christian and as well balanced as that4 ,but even if you were worsted in conjugal bargain1 you cannot be worse off than this ,abigail in my text4 ,her husband was cross and ungrateful1 an inebriate1 for on the very evening after her heroic achievement at the foot of the hill1 where she captured a whole regiment with her genial and strategic behaviour1 she returned home and found her husband so drunk that she could not tell him the story1 but had to postpone it until the next day4 ,so1 my sister1 ,i do not want you to keep saying within yourself as ,i proceed3 ,that is the way to treat a perfect husband2 for you are to remember that no wife was ever worse swindled than this ,abigail of my text4 ,at the other end of her table sat a mean1 selfish1 snarling1 contemptible sot1 and if she could do so well for a dastard1 how ought you to do with that princely and splendid man with whom you are to walk the path of life8 ,first1 ,i counsel the wife to remember in what a severe and terrific battle of life her husband is engaged4 ,whether in professional1 or commercial1 or artistic1 or mechanical life1 your husband from morning to night is in a ,solferino1 if not a ,sedan4 ,it is a wonder that your husband has any nerves or patience or suavity left4 ,to get a living in this next to the last decade of the nineteenth century is a struggle4 ,if he come home and sit down preoccupied1 you ought to excuse him4 ,if he do not feel like going out that night for a walk or entertainment1 remember he has been out all day4 ,you say he ought to leave at his place of business his annoyances and come home cheery4 ,but if a man has been betrayed by a business partner1 or a customer has cheated him out of a large bill of goods1 or a protested note has been flung on his desk1 or somebody has called him a liar1 and everything has gone wrong from morning till night1 he must have great genius and forgetfulness if he do not bring some of the perplexity home with him4 ,when you tell me he ought to leave it all at the store or bank or shop1 you might as well tell a storm on the ,atlantic to stay out there and not touch the coast or ripple the harbor4 ,,respect ,,self-,,sacrifice4 ,remember1 he is not overworking so much for himself as he is overworking for you and the children4 ,it is the effect of his success or defeat on the homestead that causes him the agitation4 ,the most of men after forty-five years of age live not for themselves1 but for their families4 ,they begin to ask themselves anxiously the question3 ,how if ,i should give out1 what would become of the folks at home8 ,would my children ever get their education8 ,would my wife have to go out into the world to earn bread for herself and our little ones8 ,my eyesight troubles me2 how if my eyes should fail8 ,my head gets dizzy2 how if ,i should drop under apoplexy8 ,the high pressure of business life and mechanical life and agricultural life is home pressure4 ,some time ago a large ,london firm decided that if any of their clerks married on a salary less than ,l#aej--that is1 #gej a year--he should be discharged1 the supposition being that the temptation might be too great for misappropriation4 ,the large majority of families in ,america live by utmost dint of economy1 and to be honest and yet meet one's family expenses is the appalling question that turns the life of tens of thousands of men into martyrdom4 ,let the wife of the overborne and exhausted husband remember this1 and do not nag him about that1 and say you might as well have no husband when the fact is he is dying by inches that the home may be kept up4 ,,be ,,lovable4 ,i charge also the wife to keep herself as attractive after marriage as she was before marriage4 ,the reason that so often a man ceases to love his wife is because the wife ceases to be lovable4 ,in many cases what elaboration of toilet before marriage1 and what recklessness of appearance after6 ,the most disgusting thing on earth is a slatternly woman--,i mean a woman who never combs her hair until she goes out1 or looks like a fright until somebody calls4 ,that a man married to one of these creatures stays at home as little as possible is no wonder4 ,it is a wonder that such a man does not go on a whaling voyage of three years1 and in a leaky ship4 ,costly wardrobe is not required2 but1 ,o woman6 if you are not willing1 by all that ingenuity of refinement can effect1 to make yourself attractive to your husband1 you ought not to complain if he seek in other society those pleasant surroundings which you deny him4 ,,do ,,not ,,complain4 ,again1 ,i charge you never talk to others about the frailties of your husband4#a ,some people have a way1 in banter1 of elaborately describing to others the shortcomings or unhappy eccentricities of a husband or wife4 ,ah1 the world will find out soon enough all the defects of your companion6 ,no need of your advertising them6 ,better imitate those women who1 having made mistake in affiance1 always have a veil to hide imperfections and alleviations of conduct to mention4 ,we must admit that there are rare cases where a wife cannot live longer with her husband1 and his cruelties and outrages are the precursor of divorcement or separation4 ,but until that day comes1 keep the awful secret to yourself--keep it from every being in the universe except the ,god to whom you do well to tell your trouble4 ,trouble only a few years at most1 and then you can go up on the other side of the grave1 and say3 ,o ,lord1 ,i kept the marital secret6 ,thou knowest how well ,i kept it1 and ,i thank ,thee that the release has come at last4 ,give me some place where ,i can sit down and rest awhile from the horrors of an embruted earthly alliance1 before ,i begin the full raptures of heaven4 ,and orders will be sent out to the usher angels1 saying3 ,take this ,abigail right up to the softest seat in the best room of the palace1 and let twenty of the brightest angels wait on her for the next thousand years4 ,,avoid ,,meddlers4 ,further1 ,i charge you1 let there be no outside interference with the conjugal relation4 ,neither neighbor nor confidential friend1 nor brother1 nor sister1 nor father1 nor mother1 have a right to come in here4 ,the married gossip will come around1 and by the hour tell you how she manages her husband4 ,you tell her plainly that if she will attend to the affairs of her household you will attend to yours4 ,what damage some people do with their tongues6 ,nature indicates that the tongue is a dangerous thing1 by the fact that it is shut in1 first by a barricade of teeth1 and then by the door of the lips4 ,one insidious talker can keep a whole neighborhood badly stirred up4 ,the ,apostle ,peter excoriated these busybodies in other people's matters1 and ,st4 ,paul1 in his letter to the ,thessalonians and to ,timothy1 gives them a sharp dig1 and the good housewife will be on the lookout for them1 and never return their calls1 and treat them with coldest frigidity4 ,for this reason1 better keep house as soon as possible4 ,some people are opposed to them1 but ,i thank ,god for what are called flats in these cities4 ,they put a separate home within the means of nearly all the population4 ,in your married relations you do not need any advice4 ,if you and your husband have not skill enough to get along well alone1 with all the advice you can import you will get along worse4 ,what you want for your craft on this voyage is plenty of sea-room4 ,,be ,,intelligent4 ,i charge you1 also1 make yourself the intelligent companion of your husband4 ,what with these floods of newspapers and books there is no excuse for the wife's ignorance either about the present or the past4 ,if you have no more than a half-hour every day to yourself you may fill your mind with entertaining and useful knowledge4 ,let the merchant's wife read up on all mercantile questions1 and the mechanic's wife on all that pertains to his style of work1 and the professional man's wife on all the legal1 or medical1 or theological1 or political discussions of the day4 ,it is very stupid for a man1 after having been amid active minds all day1 to find his wife without information or opinions on anything4 ,if the wife knows nothing about what is going on in the world1 after the tea-hour has passed1 and the husband has read the newspaper1 he will have an engagement and must go and see a man4 ,in nine cases out of ten when a man does not stay at home in the evening1 unless positive duty calls him away1 it is because there is nothing to stay for4 ,he would rather talk with his wife than anyone else if she could talk as well4 ,,adorn ,,the ,,home4 ,i charge you1 my sister1 in every way to make your home attractive4 ,i have not enough of practical knowledge about house adornment to know just what makes the difference1 but here is an opulent house1 containing all wealth of bric-a-brac1 and of musical instrument1 and of painting1 and of upholstery1 and yet there is in it a chill like ,nova ,zembla4 ,another home1 with one-twentieth part of the outlay1 and small supply of art1 and cheapest piano purchasable1 and yet1 as you enter it1 there comes upon body1 mind1 and soul a glow of welcome and satisfied and happy domesticity4 ,the holy art of making the most comfort and brightness out of the means afforded1 every wife should study4 ,at the siege of ,argus1 ,pyrrhus was killed by the tile of a roof thrown by a woman1 and ,abimelech was slain by a stone that a woman threw from the tower of ,thebes1 and ,earl ,montfort was destroyed by a rock discharged at him by a woman from the walls of ,toulouse4 ,but without any weapon save that of her cold1 cheerless household arrangement1 any wife may slay all the attractions of a home circle4 ,a wife and mother in prosperous circumstances and greatly admired was giving her chief time to social life4 ,the husband spent his evenings away4 ,the son1 fifteen years of age1 got the same habit1 and there was a prospect that the other children1 as they got old enough1 would take the same turn4 ,one day the wife aroused to the consideration that she had better save her husband and her boy4 ,interesting and stirring games were introduced into the house4 ,the mother studied up interesting things to tell her children4 ,one morning the son said3 ,father1 you ought to have been home last night4 ,we had a grand time4 ,such jolly games and such interesting stories6 ,this went on from night to night1 and after a while the husband stayed in to see what was going on1 and he finally got attracted1 and added something of his own to the evening entertainments2 and the result was that the wife and mother saved her husband and saved her boy and saved herself4 ,was not that an enterprise worth the attention of the greatest woman that ever lived since ,abigail at the foot of the rock arrested the four hundred armed warriors8 ,,the ,,true ,,sphere4 ,do not1 my sister1 be dizzied and disturbed by the talk of those who think the home circle too insignificant for a woman's career1 and who want to get you out on platforms and in conspicuous enterprises4 ,there are women who have a special outside mission1 and do not dare to interpret me as derisive of their important mission4 ,but my opinion is that the woman who can reinforce her husband in the work of life and rear her children for positions of usefulness is doing more for ,god and the race and her own happiness than if she spoke on every great platform and headed a hundred great enterprises4 ,my mother never made a missionary speech in her life1 and at a missionary meeting ,i doubt whether she could have got enough courage to vote aye or no1 but she raised her son ,john1 who has been preaching the ,gospel and translating religious literature in ,amoy1 ,china1 for about forty years4 ,was not that a better thing to do8 ,compare such an one with one of these dieaway1 attitudinizing1 frivolous1 married coquettes of the modern drawing-room1 her heaven an opera box on the night of ,meyerbeer's ,robert le ,diable1 the ten commandments an inconvenience1 taking arsenic to improve the complexion1 and her appearance a confused result of belladonna1 bleached hair1 antimony and mineral acids1 until one is compelled to discuss her character1 and wonder whether the line between a decent and indecent life is1 like the equator1 an imaginary line4 ,a ,,pressing ,,want4 ,what the world wants now is about fifty thousand old-fashioned mothers1 women who shall realize that the highest1 grandest1 mightiest institution on earth is the home4 ,it is not necessary that they should have the same old-time manners of the country farm-house1 or wear the old-fashioned cap and spectacles and apron that her glorified ancestry wore2 but ,i mean the old spirit which began with the ,hannahs and the ,mother ,lois and the ,abigails of ,scripture days1 and was demonstrated on the homestead where some of us were reared1 though the old house long ago was pulled down and its occupants scattered1 never to meet until in the higher home that awaits the families of the righteous4 ,while there are more good and faithful wives and mothers now than there ever were1 society has got a wrong twist on this subject1 and there are influences abroad that would make women believe their chief sphere is outside instead of inside the home4 ,a ,,deadly ,,sin4 ,hence in many households1 children instead of a blessing are a nuisance4 ,it is card case versus child's primer1 carriage versus cradle1 social popularity versus domestic felicity4 ,hence infanticide and antenatal murder so common that all the physicians1 allopathic1 hydropathic1 homoeopathic1 and eclectic are crying out in horror1 and it is time that the pulpits joined with the medical profession in echoing and re-echoing the thunder of ,mount ,sinai1 which says3 ,thou shalt not kill1 and the book of ,revelation1 which says3 ,all murderers shall have their place in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone4 ,and the man or the woman who takes life a minute old will as certainly go straight to hell as the man or woman who destroys life forty years old4 ,and the wildest1 loudest shriek of ,judgment ,day will be given at the overthrow of those who moved in the high and respected circles of earthly society1 yet decreed by their own act1 as far as they could privately effect it1 the extermination of the advancing generations1 abetted in the horrid crime by a lot of infernal quacks with which modern medicine is infested4 ,when1 on the ,last ,day1 the crier of the ,court shall with resounding ,oyez1 ,oyez6 declare the ,oyer and ,terminer of the ,universe opened1 and the ,judge1 with gavel of thunderbolt1 shall smite the nations into silence1 and the trial of all the fratricides1 and parricides1 and matricides1 and patricides1 and uxoricides1 and regicides1 and deicides1 and infanticides of the earth shall proceed1 none of my hearers or readers can say that they knew not what they were doing4 ,mighty ,god6 arrest the evil that is overshadowing this century4 ,,the ,,head ,,of ,,the ,,household4 ,i charge you1 my sister1 that you take your husband along with you to heaven4 ,of course this implies that you yourself are a ,christian4 ,i must take that for granted4 ,it cannot be possible that after what ,christianity has done for woman1 and after taking the infinitely responsible position you have assumed as the head of the household1 that you should be in a position antagonistic to ,christ4 ,it was not a slip of the tongue when ,i spoke of you as being at the head of the household4 ,we men rather pride ourselves as being at the head of the household1 but it is only a pleasant delusion4 ,to whom do the children go when they have trouble8 ,when there is a sore finger to be bound up or one of the first teeth that needs to be removed to make way for one that is crowding it out1 to whom does the child go8 ,for whom do children cry out in the night when they get frightened at a bad dream8 ,aye1 to whom does the husband go when he has a business trouble too great or too delicate for outside ears8 ,we1 the men1 are heads of the household in name1 but you1 ,o wives6 are the heads of the household in fact1 and it is your business to take your husband with you into the kingdom of ,god1 and see that house prepared for heaven4 ,you can do it6 ,of course ,god's almighty grace alone can convert him1 but you are to be the instrument4 ,some wives keep their husbands out of heaven1 and others garner them for it4 ,if your religion1 ,o wife6 is simply the joke of the household1 if you would rather go to the theatre than the prayer-meeting1 if you can beat all the neighborhood in progressive euchre1 if your husband never sees you kneel at the bedside in prayer before retiring1 if the only thing that reminds the family of your church relations is that on communion-day you get home late to dinner1 you will not be able to take your husband to heaven1 for the simple reason that you will not get there yourself4 ,but ,i suppose that your religion is genuine1 and that the husband realizes that there is in your soul a divine principle1 and that1 though you may be naturally quicker tempered than he is and have many imperfections that distress you more than they can any one else1 still you are destined for the skies when the brief scenes of this life are over4 ,how will you take him with you8 ,there are two oars to that boat--prayer and holy example4 ,but you say he belongs to a worldly club1 or he does not believe a word of the ,bible1 or he is an inebriate and very loose in his habits8 ,what you tell me shows that you don't understand that while you are at the one end of a prayer1 the omnipotent ,god is at the other end1 and it is simply a question whether ,almightiness is strong enough and keeps ,his word4 ,i have no doubt there will be great conventions in heaven1 called for celebrative purposes1 and when in some ,celestial assemblage the saints shall be telling what brought them to ,god1 ,i believe that ten thousand times ten thousand will say3 ,my wife4 ,a ,,contrast4 ,i put beside each other two testimonies of men concerning their wives1 and let you see the contrast4 ,an aged man was asked the reason of his salvation4 ,with tearful emotion he said3 ,my wife was brought to ,god some years before myself4 ,i persecuted and abused her because of her religion4 ,she1 however1 returned nothing but kindness1 constantly maintaining an anxiety to promote my comfort and happiness2 and it was her amiable conduct when suffering ill-treatment from me that first sent the arrows of conviction to my soul4 ,the other testimony was from a dying man3 ,harriet1 ,i am a lost man4 ,you opposed our family worship and my secret prayer4 ,you drew me away into temptation and to neglect every religious duty4 ,i believe my fate is sealed4 ,harriet1 you are the cause of my everlasting ruin4 ,how many glorious married couples in heaven--,adam and ,eve1 ,abraham and ,sarah1 ,lapidoth and ,deborah1 ,isaac and ,rebekah1 ,jacob and ,rachel1 ,zacharias and ,elizabeth1 ,joseph and ,mary1 and many whom we have known as good as the most of them6 ,as once you stood in the village or city church or in your father's house1 perhaps under a wedding-bell of flowers1 to-day stand up1 husband and wife1 beneath the cross of a pardoning ,redeemer1 while ,i proclaim the banns of an eternal marriage4 ,join your right hands4 ,i pronounce you one forever4 ,the circle is an emblem of eternity1 and that is the shape of the ,wedding ,ring4 ,,footnotes3 #a ,as ,abigail did 7#a ,sam4 #be3be74 ,,costume ,,and ,,morals4 ,moreover the ,lord said1 ,because the daughters of ,zion are haughty1 and walk with stretched-forth necks and wanton eyes1 walking and mincing as they go1 and making a tinkling with their feet3 in that day the ,lord will take away the bravery of their tinkling ornaments about their feet1 and their cauls1 and their round tires like the moon1 the chains1 and the bracelets1 and the mufflers1 the bonnets1 and the ornaments of the legs1 and the headbands1 and the tablets1 and the earrings1 the rings1 and nose-jewels1 the changeable suits of apparel1 and the mantles1 and the wimples1 and the crisping pins1 the glasses1 and the fine linen1 and the hoods1 and the veils1--,,isaiah #c3af1 #ah-bc4b ,this is a ,jerusalem fashion plate4 ,it puts us two thousand six hundred years back1 and sets us down in an ancient city4 ,the procession of men and women is moving up and down the gay streets4 ,it is the height of the fashionable season4 ,the sensible men and women move with so much modesty that they do not attract our attention4 ,but here come the haughty daughters of ,jerusalem6 ,they lean forward2 they lean very much forward--so far forward as to be unnatural--teetering1 wobbling1 wriggling1 flirting1 or1 as my text describes it1 they walk with stretched-forth necks1 walking and mincing as they go4 ,see6 ,that is a princess4 ,look6 ,that is a ,damascus sword-maker4 ,look6 ,that is a ,syrian merchant4 ,the jingling of the chains1 and the lashing of the headbands1 and the exhibitions of universal swagger attract the attention of the ,prophet ,isaiah1 and he brings his camera to bear upon the scene1 and takes a picture for all the ages4 ,but where is that scene8 ,vanished4 ,where are those gay streets8 ,vermin-covered population pass through them4 ,where are the hands1 and the necks1 and the foreheads1 and the shoulders1 and the feet that sported all that magnificence8 ,ashes6 ,ashes6 ,that we should all be clad is proved by the opening of ,,the ,,first ,,wardrobe in ,paradise1 with its apparel of dark green4 ,that we should all as far as our means allow us be beautifully and gracefully apparelled is proved by the fact that ,god never made a wave but ,he gilded it with golden sunbeams1 or a tree but ,he garlanded it with blossoms1 or a sky but ,he studded it with stars1 or allowed even the smoke of a furnace to ascend but ,he columned1 and turreted1 and doled1 and scrolled it into outlines of indescribable gracefulness4 ,when ,i see the apple orchards of the spring and the pageantry of the autumnal forests1 ,i come to the conclusion that if nature ever does join the ,church1 while she may be a ,quaker in the silence of her worship1 she never will be a ,quaker in the style of her dress4 ,why the notches of a fern leaf or the stamen of a water lily8 ,why1 when the day departs1 does it let the folding doors of heaven stay open so long1 when it might go in so quickly8 ,one summer morning ,i saw an army of a million spears1 each one adorned with a diamond of the first water--,i mean the grass with the dew on it4 ,when the prodigal came home his father not only put a coat on his back1 but jewelry on his hand4 ,christ wore a beard1 ,paul1 the bachelor apostle1 not afflicted with any sentimentality1 admired the arrangement of a woman's hair1 when he said in his epistle3 ,if a woman have long hair1 it is a glory unto her4 ,there will be fashion in heaven as on earth1 but it will be a different kind of fashion4 ,it will decide the color of the dress2 and the population of that country1 by a beautiful law1 will wear white4 ,,the ,,goddess ,,of ,,fashion4 ,i say these things as a background to my sermon1 to show you that ,i have no prim1 precise1 prudish1 or cast-iron theories on the subject of human apparel2 but the goddess of fashion has set up her throne in this country and at the sound of the timbrels we are all expected to fall down and worship4 ,her altars smoke with the sacrifice of the bodies and souls of ten thousand victims4 ,when ,i come to count the victims of fashion ,i find as many masculine as feminine4 ,men make an easy tirade against woman1 as though she were the chief worshipper at this idolatrous shrine1 and no doubt some men in the more conspicuous part of the pew have already cast glances at the more retired part of the pew1 their look a prophecy of a generous distribution4 ,my sermon shall be as appropriate for one end of the pew as for the other4 ,,masculine ,,follies4 ,men are as much the idolaters of fashion as women1 but they sacrifice on a different part of the altar4 ,with men the fashion goes to cigars1 and club-rooms1 and yachting parties1 and wine suppers4 ,in the ,united ,states the men chew up and smoke one hundred millions of dollars' worth of tobacco every year4 ,that is their fashion4 ,in ,london not long ago a man died who started in life with #gej1jjj2 but he ate it all up in gluttonies1 sending his agents to all parts of the earth for some rare delicacy for the palate1 sometimes one plate of food costing him three or four hundred dollars4 ,he ate up his whole fortune1 and had only one guinea left4 ,with that he bought a woodcock1 and had it dressed in the very best style1 ate it1 gave two hours for digestion1 then walked out on ,westminster ,bridge and threw himself into the ,thames and died1 doing on a large scale what you and ,i have often seen done on a small scale4 ,but men do not abstain from millinery and elaboration of skirt through any superiority of simplicity4 ,it is only because such appendages would be a blockade to business4 ,what would sashes and trains three and a half yards long do in a stock market8 ,and yet men are the disciples of custom just as much as women4 ,some of them wear boots so tight that they can hardly walk in the paths of righteousness1 and there are men who buy expensive suits of clothes and never pay for them1 and who go through the streets in great stripes of color1 like animated checkerboards4 ,i say these things because ,i want to show you that ,i am impartial in my discourse1 and that both sexes1 in the language of the surrogate's office1 share and share alike4 ,,indelicate ,,apparel4 ,as ,god may help me ,i am going to set forth the evil effects of improper dress or an excessive discipleship of costume4 ,it is a simple truth that you all know1 although the pulpit has not yet uttered it1 that much of the womanly costume of our time is the cause of the temporal and eternal damnation of a multitude of men4 ,there is a shamelessness among many in what is called high life that calls for vehement protest4 ,the strife with many seems to be how near they can come to the verge of indecency without falling over4 ,the tide of masculine profligacy will never turn back until there is a decided reformation in womanly costume4 ,i am in full sympathy with the officer of the law who1 at a levee in ,philadelphia last winter1 went up to a so-called lady1 and because of her sparse and incompetent apparel1 ordered her either to leave the house or habilitate herself immediately4 ,it is high time that our good and sensible women make vehement protest against fashionable indecency1 and if the women of the household do not realize the deplorable extremes of much of the female costume1 that husbands implead their wives on this subject1 and that fathers prohibit their daughters4 ,the evil is terrific and overshadowing4 ,,stage ,,costumes4 ,i suppose that the ,american stage is responsible for much of this4 ,i do not go to the theatres1 so ,i must take the evidence of the actors and managers of theatres1 such as ,mr4 ,john ,gilbert1 ,mr4 ,a4,m4 ,palmer1 and ,mr4 ,daniel ,e4 ,bandmann4 ,they have recently told us that the crime of undress is blasting the theatre1 which by many is considered a school of morals1 and indeed superior to the ,church1 and a forerunner of the millennium4 ,mr4 ,palmer says3 ,the bulk of the performances on the stage are degrading and pernicious4 ,the managers strive to come just as near the line as possible without flagrantly breaking the law4 ,there never have been costumes worn on a stage of this city1 either in a theatre1 hall1 or 'dive1' so improper as those that clothe some of the chorus in recent comic opera productions4 ,he says in regard to the female performers3 ,it is not a question whether they can sing1 but just how little they will consent to wear4 ,mr4 ,bandmann1 who has been twenty-nine years on the stage1 and before almost all nationalities1 says3 ,i unhesitatingly state that the taste of the present theatre-going people of ,america1 as a body1 is of a coarse and vulgar nature4 ,the ,hindoo would turn with disgust at such exhibitions1 which are sought after and applauded on the stage of this country4 ,our shop windows are full of and the walls covered with show cards and posters which should be a disgrace to an enlightened country and an insult to the eye of a cultured community4 ,mr4 ,gilbert says3 ,such exhibition is a disastrous one to the morals of the community4 ,are these proper pictures to put out for the public to look at1 to say nothing of the propriety of females appearing in public dressed like that8 ,it is shameful6 ,i must take the testimony of the friends of the theatre and the confirmation which ,i see on the board fences and in the show windows containing the pictures of the way actresses dress4 ,i suppose that those representations of play-house costume are true1 for if they are not true1 then those highly moral and religious theatres are swindling the public by inducing the people to the theatre by promises of spectacular nudity which they do not fulfill4 ,now1 all this familiarizes the public with such improprieties of costume and depresses the public conscience as to what is allowable and right4 ,,drawing-,,room ,,rivalry4 ,the parlor and drawing-room are now running a race with the theatre and opera bouffe4 ,they are now nearly neck and neck in the race1 the latter a little ahead2 but the parlor and the drawing-room are gaining on the others1 and the probability is they will soon be even and pass the stand so nearly at the same time that one half of ,pandemonium will clap its hands because opera bouffe has beaten1 and the other half because the drawing-room has beaten4 ,let printing-press1 and platform1 and pulpit hurl red-hot anathema at the boldness of much of womanly attire4 ,i charge ,christian women1 neither by style of dress nor adjustment of apparel1 to become administrative of evil4 ,show me the fashion plates of any age between this and the time of ,louis ,,xvi41 of ,france1 and ,henry ,,viii41 of ,england1 and ,i will tell you the type of morals or immorals of that age or that year4 ,no exception to it4 ,modest apparel means a righteous people4 ,immodest apparel always means a contaminated and depraved society4 ,,extravagance4 ,it is not only such boldness that is to be reprehended1 but extravagance of costume4 ,this latter is the cause of fraud unlimitable and ghastly4 ,do you know that ,arnold of the ,revolution proposed to sell his country in order to get money to support his home wardrobe8 ,i declare here before ,god and this people that the effort to keep up expensive establishments in this country is sending more business men to temporal perdition than all other causes combined4 ,it was this that sent prominent business men to the watering of stocks1 and life insurance presidents to perjured statements about their assets1 and some of them to the penitentiary1 and has completely upset our ,american finances4 ,but why should ,i go to these famous defaultings1 to show what men will do in order to keep up great home style and expensive wardrobe1 when you and ,i know scores of men who are put to their wit's end and are lashed from ,january to ,december in the attempt8 ,our ,washington politicians may theorize until the expiration of their terms of office as to the best way of improving our monetary condition in this country4 ,it will be of no use1 and things will be no better until we learn to put on our heads and backs and feet and hands no more than we can pay for4 ,,an ,,incentive ,,to ,,dishonesty4 ,there are clerks in stores and banks on limited salaries who in the vain attempt to keep the wardrobe of their family as showy as other folk's wardrobes are dying of muffs1 and diamonds1 and camel's-hair shawls1 and high hats1 and they have nothing left except what they give to cigars and wine suppers1 and they die before their time1 and they will expect us ministers to preach about them as though they were the victims of early piety2 and after a high-class funeral1 with silver handles at the side of their coffin of extraordinary brightness1 it will be found out that the undertaker is cheated out of his legitimate expenses6 ,do not send to me to preach the funeral sermon of a man who dies like that4 ,i would blurt out the whole truth1 and tell that he was strangled to death by his wife's ribbons6 ,the country is dressed to death4 ,you are not surprised to find that the putting up of one public building in ,new ,york cost millions of dollars more than it ought to have cost1 when you find that the man who gave out the contracts paid more than five thousand dollars for his daughter's wedding dress4 ,cashmeres of a thousand dollars each are not rare on ,broadway4 ,it is estimated that there are eight thousand women in these two cities who have expended on their personal array two thousand dollars a year4 ,what are the men to do in order to keep up such home wardrobes8 ,steal--that is the only respectable thing they can do6 ,during the last fifteen years there have been innumerable fine business men shipwrecked on the wardrobe4 ,the temptation comes in this way3 a man thinks more of his family than all the world outside1 and if they spend the evening in describing to him the superior wardrobe of the family across the street that they cannot bear the sight of1 the man is thrown on his gallantry and his pride of family1 and without translating his feelings into plain language1 he goes into extortion and issuing of false stock and skillful penmanship in writing somebody else's name at the foot of a promissory note2 and they all go down together--the husband to the prison1 the wife to the sewing machine1 the children to be taken care of by those who were called poor relations4 ,oh1 for some new ,shakespeare to arise and write ,,the ,,tragedy ,,of ,,clothes6 ,act the first of the tragedy3 ,a plain but beautiful home4 ,enter the newly married pair4 ,enter simplicity of manner and behavior4 ,enter as much happiness as is ever found in one home4 ,act the second3 ,discontent with the humble home4 ,enter envy4 ,enter jealousy4 ,enter desire to display4 ,act the third3 ,enlargement of expenses4 ,enter all the queenly dressmakers4 ,enter the ,french milliners4 ,act the fourth3 ,the tip-top of society4 ,enter princes and princesses of ,new ,york life4 ,enter magnificent plate and equipage4 ,enter everything splendid4 ,act the fifth and last1 winding up the scene3 ,enter the assignee4 ,enter the sheriff4 ,enter the creditors4 ,enter humiliation4 ,enter the wrath of ,god4 ,enter the contempt of society4 ,enter death4 ,now1 let the silk curtain drop on the stage4 ,the farce is ended1 and the lights are out4 ,will you forgive me if ,i say in tersest shape possible1 that some of the men in this country have to forge1 and to perjure1 and to swindle to pay for their wives' dresses8 ,i will say it whether you forgive me or not4 ,,curtails ,,benevolence4 ,again1 extravagant costume is the foe of all ,christian alms-giving4 ,men and women put so much in personal display that they often have nothing for ,god and the cause of suffering humanity--a ,christian man cracking his ,palais ,royal gloves across the back by shutting up his hand to hide the one cent he puts into the poor box6 a ,christian woman at the story of the ,hottentots crying copious tears into a twenty-five dollar handkerchief1 and then giving a two-cent piece to the collection1 thrusting it down under the bills1 so people will not know but it was a ten-dollar gold piece6 ,one hundred dollars for incense to fashion--two cents for ,god6 ,god gives us ninety cents out of every dollar4 ,the other ten cents1 by command of ,his ,bible1 belong to ,him4 ,is not ,god liberal according to this tithing system laid down in the ,old ,testament--is not ,god liberal in giving us ninety cents out of a dollar when he takes but ten8 ,we do not like that4 ,we want to have ninety-nine cents for ourselves and one for ,god4 ,now1 ,i would a great deal rather steal ten cents from you than ,god4 ,i think one reason why a great many people do not get along in worldly accumulation faster is because they do not observe this ,divine rule4 ,god says3 ,well1 if that man is not satisfied with ninety cents out of a dollar1 then ,i will take the whole dollar1 and ,i will give it to the man or woman who is honest with me4 ,the greatest obstacle to charity in the ,christian church to-day is the fact that men expend so much on their table1 and women so much on their dress1 they have got nothing left for the work of ,god and the world's betterment4 ,,distracts ,,attention4 ,again1 extravagant costume is distraction to a public worship4 ,you know very well there are a good many people who go to church just as they go to the races1 to see who will come out first4 ,men and women with souls to be saved passing the hour in wondering where that man got his cravat1 or what store that woman patronizes4 ,in many of our churches the preliminary exercises are taken up with the discussion of wardrobes4 ,it is pitiable4 ,is it not wonderful that the ,lord does not strike the meeting-houses with lightning8 ,what distraction of public worship6 ,dying men and women1 whose bodies are soon to be turned into dust1 yet before three worlds strutting like peacocks4 ,people sitting down in a pew or taking up a hymn book1 all absorbed at the same time in personal array1 to sing3 ,rise1 my soul1 and stretch thy wings1 ,thy better portion trace2 ,rise from transitory things ,toward heaven1 thy native place6 ,i adopt the ,episcopalian prayer1 and say3 ,good ,lord1 deliver us6 ,,mental ,,impoverishment4 ,extravagant costume belittles the intellect4 ,our minds are enlarged or they dwindle just in proportion to the importance of the subject on which we constantly dwell4 ,can you imagine anything more dwarfing to the human intellect than the study of dress8 ,i see men on the street who1 judging from their elaboration1 ,i think must have taken two hours to arrange their apparel4 ,after a few years of that kind of absorption1 which one of ,mc,allister's magnifying glasses will be powerful enough to make the man's character visible8 ,what will be left of a woman's intellect after giving years and years to the discussion of such questions8 ,they all land in idiocy4 ,i have seen men at the summer watering-places through fashion the mere wreck of what they once were4 ,sallow of cheek4 ,meagre of limb4 ,hollow at the chest4 ,showing no animation save in rushing across a room to pick up a lady's fan4 ,simpering along the corridors the same compliments they simpered twenty years ago4 ,,bars ,,heaven4 ,yet1 my friends1 ,i have given you only the milder phase of this evil4 ,it shuts a great multitude out of heaven4 ,the first peal of thunder that shook ,sinai declared3 ,thou shalt have no other gods before me1 and you will have to choose between the goddess of fashion and the ,christian ,god4 ,there are a great many seats in heaven1 and they are all easy seats1 but not one seat for the devotee of costume4 ,heaven is for meek and quiet spirits4 ,heaven is for those who think more of their souls than of their bodies4 ,give up this idolatry of fashion or give up heaven4 ,what would you do standing beside the ,countess of ,huntingdon1 whose joy it was to build chapels for the poor2 or with that ,christian woman of ,boston1 who fed fifteen hundred children of the street1 at ,fanueil ,hall1 one ,new ,year's ,day1 giving out as a sort of doxology at the end of the meeting a pair of shoes to each one of them2 or those ,dorcases of modern society who have consecrated their needles to the ,lord1 and who will get eternal reward for every stitch they take8 ,,perpetual ,,envy4 ,oh1 men and women1 give up the idolatry of costume6 ,the rivalries and the competitions of such a life are a stupendous wretchedness4 ,you will always find some one with brighter array1 and with more palatial residence1 and with lavender kid gloves that make a tighter fit4 ,and if you buy this thing and wear it you will wish you had bought something else and worn it4 ,and the frets of such a life will bring the crow's feet to your temples before they are due1 and when you come to die you will have a miserable time4 ,i have seen men and women of excessive costume die1 and ,i never saw one of them die well4 ,the trappings off1 there they lay on the tumbled pillow1 and there were just two things that bothered them--a wasted life and a coming eternity4 ,i could not pacify them1 for their body1 mind1 and soul had been exhausted in the worship of costume1 and they could not appreciate the ,gospel4 ,when ,i knelt by their bedside they were mumbling out their regrets1 and saying3 ,o ,god6 ,o ,god6 ,their garments hung up in the wardrobe never again to be seen by them4 ,without any exception1 so far as my memory serves me1 they died without hope1 and went into eternity unprepared4 ,the two most ghastly death-beds on earth are the one where a man dies of delirium tremens1 and the other where a woman dies after having sacrificed all her faculties of body1 mind and soul in the worship of costume4 ,,judgment ,,to ,,come4 ,my friends1 we must appear in judgment to answer for what we have worn on our bodies as well as for what repentances we have exercised with our souls4 ,on that day ,i see coming in ,beau ,brummell of the last century without his cloak2 ,aaron ,burr1 without the letters that to old age he showed in pride1 to prove his early wicked gallantries2 and ,absalom without his hair2 and ,marchioness ,pompadour without her titles2 and ,mrs4 ,arnold1 the belle of ,wall ,street1 when that was the centre of fashion1 without her fripperies of vesture4 ,and in great haggardness they shall go away into eternal expatriation1 while among the queens of heavenly society will be found ,vashti1 who wore the modest veil before the palatial bacchanalians2 and ,hannah1 who annually made a little coat for ,samuel at the temple2 and ,grandmother ,lois1 the ancestress of ,timothy1 who imitated her virtue2 and ,mary1 who gave ,jesus ,christ to the world2 and many of you1 the wives1 and mothers1 and sisters1 and daughters of the present ,christian church who1 through great tribulation1 are entering into the kingdom of ,god4 ,christ announced who would make up the royal family of heaven when ,he said3 ,whosoever doeth the will of ,god1 the same is my brother1 my sister1 my mother4 ,,footnotes3 #b ,the list of feminine treasures given by the ,revised ,version is more intelligible4 ,it is3 ,their anklets1 and the networks1 and the crescents2 the pendants1 and the bracelets1 and the mufflers2 the head-tires1 and the ankle chains1 and the sashes1 and the perfume boxes1 and the amulets2 the rings1 and the nose-jewels2 the festival robes1 and the mantles1 and the shawls1 and the satchels2 the hand-mirrors1 and the fine linen1 and the turbans1 and the veils4 ,,husbands ,,and ,,wives4 ,let every one in particular so love his wife even as himself2 and the wife see that she reverence her husband4--,,ephesians #e3cc4 ,all this good advice by a man who never married4 ,he lived on to fifty-eight years of age1 in eminent bachelorhood4 ,indeed1 it was better for ,paul to remain in single life1 because he went on such rapid missionary expeditions that no companion could have endured the hardship4 ,celibacy in some cases is better4 ,such persons accomplish under such circumstances that which could not be accomplished in the other style of life4 ,i have known men who remain unaffianced in order that they might take care of the children of a deceased brother2 and what would become of the world without the self-sacrifice and helpfulness of the maiden aunts ,i cannot imagine4 ,among the brightest queens of ,heaven will be those who took care of other people's children4 ,alas for that household which has not within easy call an ,aunt ,mary6 ,i know that there are caricatures1 and ungallant things sometimes said2 but so far as my observation goes1 they are quite equal in disposition to their married sisters4 ,the state of celibacy is honored again by such persons as ,macaulay and ,washington ,irving in literature1 and ,florence ,nightingale and ,miss ,dix in philanthropy4 ,but while ,paul remained in the single state1 he kept his eyes open1 and he looked off upon the calm sea of married life1 and upon the chopped sea of domestic perturbation4 ,he comes forth in my text to say1 ,let every one in particular so love his wife even as himself2 and the wife see that she reverence her husband2 implying that the wife ought to be lovable1 so there might be something to love1 and the man ought to be honorable1 so there might be something to reverence4 ,it is ,a ,,most ,,congratulatory ,,thought that the vast majority of people in the married state are well mated4 ,when the news is first announced in the outside world of the betrothal1 there may be surprise and seeming incongruity1 but as the years pass by it is demonstrated that the selection was divinely arranged4 ,there may be great difference of temperament1 great difference of appearance1 great difference of circumstances4 ,that is no objection4 ,the sanguine and the phlegmatic temperaments make appropriate union1 the blonde and the brunette1 the quick and the slow1 the ,french and the ,german4 ,in the machinery of domestic life there is no more need for the driving wheel than for the brakes4 ,that is the best union generally which has just the opposites4 ,the best argument in behalf of marriage as a divine institution is the fact that the vast majority of conjugal relationships are the very best things that could have happened4 ,once in a while there is a resounding exception to the good rule1 the attempt being made to marry fire and gunpowder1 with the consequent explosion in the divorce courts2 but in the vast majority of instances the conjugal relation is a beautiful illustration of what the ,psalmist said when he declared1 ,god setteth the solitary in families4 ,taking it for granted1 then1 that you are well mated1 ,i proceed to give you some ,,prescriptions ,,for ,,domestic ,,happiness2 and1 first of all1 ,i remark3 ,i4 ,a spirit of compromise must be dominant4 ,you must remember that you were twenty or thirty years forming independent habits and having your own way4 ,in the marriage state these habits must be brought into accord1 and there may be some ingenuity necessary4 ,be determined to have your own way1 and there will be no peace4 ,let the rule be3 ,in all matters of moral principle your determination shall be iron1 and in all unimportant matters1 willow4 ,whatever you may think of the word compromise in politics1 without compromise there is no domestic peace4 ,a great many people are willing to compromise1 if you will do just as they want you to do2 but there is no compromise in that4 ,the rule ought to be3 ,in all domestic matters1 all social matters1 all ecclesiastical matters1 all political matters1 firm adherence to fundamentals1 easy surrender in non-essentials4 ,be not too proud or too stubborn to give up4 ,compromise6 ,compromise6 ,,ii4 ,i remark1 again1 that in order to domestic happiness there must be a spirit of ,,consultation4 ,the home ought to be a cabinet1 where all the affairs of the household and all the affairs of business life come under comparison1 inspection and advisal4 ,that is an absurd rule we hear abroad in the world1 that men ought never to take their business home4 ,ten thousand financial failures would have been avoided if men had consulted with their wives4 ,in the first place1 woman has a capacity to judge of moral character which man has not4 ,before you invite into your business partnership any man1 you ought to introduce him to your wife1 and get her judgment as to his capacity and his integrity4 ,after five minutes' conversation she will tell you as much about him as you will know at the close of twenty years1 and perhaps you may find out too late4 ,a man proposes to come into your business partnership4 ,you take him to your home4 ,he tarries a little while1 and is gone4 ,you say to your wife1 ,well1 what do you think of him8 ,she says1 ,i don't like him at all4 ,you say1 ,it's an absurd thing to form a prejudice against him on so short an acquaintance4 ,i have known him for years1 and ,i have never known any bad against him4 ,well1 she says1 ,i don't know why ,i have formed that opinion1 but ,i tell you to beware4 ,put none of your financial interests in that man's keeping4 ,ten or fifteen years pass by4 ,you come home some night and say1 ,well1 my dear1 you are right2 that man swindled me out of my last dollar4 ,it is not because woman is wiser than man4 ,it is because ,god has given her that peculiar intuition in regard to human character4 ,now1 you have no right to go into an enterprise which involves the homestead1 or the education of your children1 or the fate of your entire family1 without home consultation4 ,of course1 all this implies that you did not marry a fool4 ,if at the marriage altar you committed suicide1 you had better keep all your business affairs in your own heart and head4 ,but let us hope that you have sound common sense presiding in your household4 ,a ,,beautiful ,,incident4 ,how much a wife may help a husband's business affairs was well illustrated in the case where the wife saved from the allowance of herself and the allowance of the family1 a certain amount of money for a rainy day4 ,after some time the husband1 coming home1 said3 ,well1 ,i'm going to suspend payment to-morrow4 ,a few dollars would get me through1 but ,i can't get the few dollars1 and ,i'm going to ruin4 ,that evening the wife said3 ,i wish you would hunt up the definition of the word 'independence' in ,webster's ,dictionary4 ,hunt it up for me4 ,he opened ,webster's ,dictionary1 and found the word independence1 and right opposite was a #ajj bill4 ,now1 she said1 ,i would like to have you find the word 'gratitude4' ,he turned to the word gratitude1 and there was another #ajj bill4 ,and before the evening was past she asked him to read a verse of a certain chapter of the ,bible4 ,he opened to the verse in the ,bible1 and there were #ejj1 and before the evening had passed1 the man had financial relief to tide him over his disasters4 ,you call that dramatic4 ,i call that beautifully ,christian4 ,in all expenditures there ought to be consultation4 ,do not dole out money to your wife as though she were a beggar4 ,let her know how much you have1 or how little4 ,appeal to her intelligent judgment1 and she will be content1 and your own disposition will not be irritated4 ,as long as you keep a mystery about your business matters she will wonder that the allowance is so small4 ,no honorable woman wants to spend more money than can be afforded4 ,come into consultation with her on this matter4 ,show what are all your necessary outside expenses1 all the money you have for cigars and dinners at ,delmonico's1 and how much it takes for the club-house and for the political campaign1 and then have her present all the domestic expenses1 and then1 after consultation do your best4 ,it is a bad sign when a man dare not tell his business transactions to his wife4 ,there is something wrong4 ,suppose you that the gigantic forgeries which have been enacted in this country would ever have taken place if the wife had been consulted8 ,the wife would have said1 ,stop6 ,let us live in one room in the poorest house on the poorest street of the poorest town1 and have nothing but dry bread rather than that you should make yourself culpable before ,god and the law4 ,in the vast majority of cases where there has been exposure of great frauds1 the wife has been the most surprised person in the community4 ,a ,,banker some time ago misused trust funds1 and he went from fraud to fraud1 and from knavery to knavery1 until it was necessary for him to leave home before daylight4 ,his wife said3 ,where are you going8 ,i am going to ,new ,york1 said he ,i am going on the early train4 ,why1 isn't this sudden8 she asked4 ,oh1 no2 ,i expected to go1 and then he left the room and went up to the room where his daughters slept1 looked upon their calm faces for the last time1 as he supposed1 and started4 ,he was brought back by the constables of an outraged law1 and is now in the penitentiary4 ,do you suppose that man1 with a good wife1 as he had1 an honest wife1 as he had1 a ,christian wife1 as he had1 could have got into such an enormity if he had consulted in regard to her wishes8 ,consultation is the word--domestic consultation4 ,,iii4 ,again3 in order to domestic happiness1 there must1 in the conjugal state1 be ,,no ,,secrets kept one from the other4 ,what one knows both must know4 ,it is a bad sign when one partner in the conjugal relation is afraid to have the letters opened or read by the other partner4 ,surreptitious correspondence is always dangerous4 ,if a man comes to you and says1 ,i am going to tell you a great privacy1 and don't want you to tell anybody1 not even your wife1 say to him1 ,well1 now1 you had better not tell me1 for ,i shall tell her as soon as ,i get home4 ,there must be no secrecy of association4 ,you ought not to be unwilling to tell where you have been1 and with whom you have been4 ,sometimes an unwise wife will have a lady confidante whom she makes a depository of privacies which they are pledged to keep between themselves4 ,beware6 ,anything that implies that husband and wife are two and not one implies peril1 domestic peril1 social peril1 mighty peril4 ,in the vast majority of cases of domestic infelicity coming to exposure in the courts1 the trouble began by the accidental opening of a letter which implied correspondence which was never suspected4 ,in the conjugal relations1 secrets kept one from another are nitro-glycerine under the hearthstone1 and the fuse is lighted6 ,,iv4 ,again3 in order to your happiness there must be a spirit of ,,forbearance4 ,in the weeks1 the months1 the years that you were planning for each other's conquest1 only the more genial side of your nature was observable1 but now you are off guard1 and the faults are all known the one to the other4 ,you are aware of your imperfections1 unless you are one of those self-conceited people who are quickly observant of faults in others1 but oblivious to faults in yourself2 and now having found out all of each others imperfections1 forbear4 ,if the one be given to too much precision1 and the other disorderly in habits2 if the one be spendthrift and the other oversaving2 if the one be loquacious1 and the other reticent1 forbear4 ,especially1 if you both have inflammable tempers1 do not both get mad at once4 ,take turn about6 ,william ,cowper put it well when he said3 ,the kindest and the happiest pair ,will find occasion to forbear2 ,and something every day they live ,to pity1 and perhaps forgive4 ,v4 ,again3 in order to your happiness1 let there be no interfering with each other's peculiar ,,religious ,,sentiments4 ,if you are a ,baptist and your wife a ,pedo-,baptist1 do not go to splashing water into each other's faces6 ,if you are a ,presbyterian and your husband is a ,methodist1 when he shouts ,hallelujah6 do not get nervous4 ,if you have strong denominational proclivities1 one of you had better go to one church1 and the other had better go to another church2 or1 surrendering some of your intensity on that subject1 as in hundreds of cases1 come to some such church as the ,brooklyn ,tabernacle1 where1 while we adhere to the fundamentals of the ,gospel1 we do not care a rye straw for the infinitesimal differences between evangelical denominations--putting one drop of water on the brow1 if that is enough baptism1 and if not1 then plunging the candidate clear out of sight1 if that is preferred--not caring whether you believe you have been foreordained to be saved or not1 if you are only saved2 nor whether you believe in the perseverance of the saints or not1 if you will only persevere2 nor whether you prefer prayer by ,episcopal liturgy or extemporaneous supplication1 if you only pray4 ,do not let there be any religious contests across the breakfast table or the tea table4 ,it makes but little difference from what direction you come toward the riven heart of ,christ1 if you only come up to the riven heart4 ,yet1 ,i know in many families there is constant picking at opposite religious beliefs1 and attempt at proselytism4 ,you1 the father1 fight for ,episcopacy1 and you1 the mother1 fight for ,presbyterianism1 and your children will compromise the matter and be ,nothingarians6 ,,vi4 ,again3 ,i counsel you1 in order to your domestic happiness1 that you ,,cultivate ,,each ,,other',s ,,religious ,,welfare4 ,this is a profoundly agitating thought to every fair-minded man and woman4 ,you live1 together on earth2 you want to live together forever4 ,you do not want ten1 or twenty1 or fifty years to end your association1 you want to take your companion into the kingdom of ,god with you4 ,if this subject is irritating in the household1 it is because you do not understand ,christian stratagem4 ,every ,christian companion may take his or her companion into glory4 ,how8 ,ask ,god1 and he will tell you how4 ,perhaps by occasional religious remark4 ,perhaps by earnest prayer4 ,perhaps by a consistent life4 ,more probably by all these things combined4 ,paul put it forcefully when he said3 ,how knowest thou1 ,o wife1 whether thou shalt save thy husband8 how knowest thou1 ,o man1 whether thou shalt save thy wife8 ,in this house1 how many have been remarried for the skies6 ,it has become so much the general rule that when in my congregation1 as ,i often do1 ,i find a family in which the wife is a ,christian1 and the husband is not1 ,i just say frankly to him3 ,now you have got to come in4 ,you might just as well try to swim up against ,niagara rapids as against the tide of religious influence which in this church is going to surge you into the kingdom of ,god4 ,you must come in4 ,you know that your wife is right in this matter of religion4 ,she may be quick of temper1 and you may sometimes lose your patience with her1 but you know she is better than you are1 and you know when she dies she will go as straight to heaven as a shot to a target4 ,and1 if to-day1 on the way home1 a vehicle should dash down the street1 and she should fall lifeless1 with no opportunity for last words1 you might have a doubt about what would become of you1 and a doubt about what would become of the children1 but you would have no doubt about her eternal destiny4 ,somewhere under the flush of her cheek1 or under the pallor of her brow is the ,lord's mark4 ,she is your wife1 but she is ,god's child1 and you are not jealous of that relationship4 ,you only wish that you yourself were a son of the ,lord ,almighty4 ,come and have the matter settled4 ,if ,i die before you1 ,i will not forget in the next world how you stood together here1 but ,i will expect both of you4 ,you must come4 ,i say it in all ,christian love and emphasis1 as a brother talks to a brother4 ,you must come4 ,you have been united so long1 you cannot afford to have death divorce you4 ,how long it is since you began the struggle of life together6 ,you have helped each other on the road1 and what you have done for each other ,god only knows4 ,there have been tedious sicknesses1 and anxious watching1 and here and there a grave1 short but very deep2 and though the blossoms of the marriage day may have scattered1 and the lips that pronounced you one may have gone into dust1 you have through all these years been to each other true as steel4 ,now1 to-day1 ,i am going to remarry you for heaven4 ,this is the bridal day of your soul's peace4 ,here is the marriage altar4 ,kneel side by side1 take the oath of eternal fidelity1 clasp hands in a covenant never to be broken4 ,i pronounce you one on earth1 ,i pronounce you one for eternity4 ,what ,god by ,his grace hath joined together1 let not earth or hell put asunder4 ,hark6 ,i hear a humming in the air--an anthem--a wedding march--organs celestial played upon by fingers seraphic4 ,i do not think ,i ever read anything more beautiful and quaintly pathetic than ,,cotton ,,mather',s ,,description of the departure of his wife from earth to ,heaven3 ,the black day arrives4 ,i had never seen so black a day in all the time of my pilgrimage4 ,the desire of my eyes is this day to be taken from me at a stroke4 ,her death is lingering and painful4 ,all the forenoon of this day she was in the pangs of death1 and sensible until the last minute or two before her final expiration4 ,i cannot remember the discourse that passed between us1 only her devout soul was full of satisfaction about her going to a state of blessedness with the ,lord ,jesus ,christ4 ,as far as my distress would permit1 ,i studied to confirm her satisfaction and consolation4 ,when ,i saw to what a point of resignation ,i was called of the ,lord1 ,i resolved1 with ,his help1 to glorify ,him4 ,so1 two hours before she expired1 ,i knelt by her bedside and took into my hands that dear hand1 the dearest in the world1 and solemnly and sincerely gave her up to the ,lord4 ,i gently put her out of my hands and laid away her hand1 resolved that ,i would not touch it again4 ,she afterward told me that she signed and sealed my act of resignation1 and though before that she had called for me continually1 after it she never asked for me any more4 ,she conversed much until near two in the afternoon4 ,the last sensible word she spoke was to her weeping father3 ',heaven1 ,heaven will make amends for all6' ,now let us be faithful in this relation of which ,i have been speaking4 ,do you want to know ,,what ,,the ,,lord ,,thinks ,,of ,,it8 ,read the sixty-second chapter of ,isaiah1 where he says3 ,as the bridegroom rejoiceth over the bride1 so shall thy ,god rejoice over thee4 ,there is a wedding coming which will eclipse all the princely and imperial weddings the world ever saw4 ,it was a great day when ,napoleon took ,josephine2 it was a great day when ,henry ,,viii4 led ,anne ,boleyn over the cloth of gold on the street1 the cloth of gold reaching up to the palace2 it was a great day when the ,king of ,spain took ,mercedes2 but there will be a greater time when the ,lord shall take ,his bride1 the ,church1 to ,himself4 ,long time ago they were affianced1 but she has been down in the wilderness4 ,he has written her again and again1 and the day of marriage is fixed4 ,she has sent word to ,him4 ,he has sent word to her4 ,but1 oh6 was there ever such a difference in estate8 ,the ,king on the one side1 the bride of the wilderness1 poor and persecuted1 on the other4 ,the wealth of the universe on the one side1 the obscurity of the ages on the other4 ,the pomp of heaven on the one side1 the poverty of earth on the other4 ,but ,he will endow her with all ,his wealth1 and raise her to sit with ,him on a throne forever4 ,come1 thou bridal morn of the ages6 ,come6 and there shall be the rumbling of great wheels1 great chariot wheels down the sky1 and there shall be riders ahead and mounted cavalry behind1 the conquerors of heaven on white horses4 ,clear the way6 ,a thousand trumpets blare4 ,behold6 the bridegroom cometh3 go ye out to meet ,him4 ,then the charioteers shall rein in their bounding steeds of fire1 and the ,king shall dismount from the chariot1 and ,he shall take by the hand the bride of the wilderness1 all the crowded galleries of the universe1 the spectators4 ,ring all the wedding bells of heaven4 ,the ,king lifts the bride into the chariot and cries1 ,drive on6 drive up6 and the clouds shall spread their cloth of gold for the procession1 and the twain shall go through the gates triumphant1 and up the streets1 and then step into the palace at the banquet1 where ten thousand potentates and principalities and dominations1 cherubic and archangelic1 with ten thousand gleaming and uplifted chalices1 shall celebrate the day when the ,king of ,heaven and earth brings home ,his bride from the wilderness4 ,make haste1 my beloved4 ,be thou like to a roe1 or a young hart upon the mountains of spices4 ,,matrimonial ,,discords4 ,can two walk together1 except they be agreed8--,,amos #c3c4 ,a church within a church1 a republic within a republic1 a world within a world1 is spelled by four letters--,home6 ,if things go right there1 they go right everywhere2 if things go wrong there1 they go wrong everywhere4 ,the door-sill of the dwelling-house is the foundation of ,church and ,state4 ,a man never gets higher than his own garret or lower than his own cellar4 ,in other words1 domestic life overarches and undergirds all other life4 ,the highest ,house of ,congress is the domestic circle2 the rocking-chair in the nursery is higher than a throne4 ,george ,washington commanded the forces of the ,united ,states1 but ,mary ,washington commanded ,george4 ,chrysostom's mother made his pen for him4 ,if a man should start out and run seventy years in a straight line he could not get out from under the shadow of his own mantelpiece4 ,i therefore talk to you this morning about a matter of infinite and eternal moment when ,i speak of your home4 ,,the ,,social ,,balance4 ,as individuals we are fragments4 ,god makes the race in part1 and then he gradually puts us together4 ,what ,i lack1 you make up2 what you lack1 ,i make up2 our deficits and surpluses of character being the cog-wheels in the great social mechanism4 ,one person has the patience1 another has the courage1 another has the placidity1 another has the enthusiasm2 that which is lacking in one is made up by another1 or made up by all4 ,buffaloes in herds1 grouse in broods1 quail in flocks1 the human race in circles4 ,god has most beautifully arranged this4 ,it is in this way that he balances society2 this conservative and that radical keeping things even4 ,every ship must have its mast1 cutwater1 taffrail1 ballast4 ,thank ,god1 then1 for ,princeton and ,andover1 for the opposites4 ,i have no more right to blame a man for being different from me than a driving-wheel has a right to blame the iron shaft that holds it to the centre4 ,john ,wesley balances ,calvin's ,institutes4 ,a cold thinker gives to ,scotland the strong bones of theology2 ,dr4 ,guthrie clothes them with a throbbing heart and warm flesh4 ,the difficulty is that we are not satisfied with just the work that ,god has given us to do4 ,the water-wheel wants to come inside the mill and grind the grist1 and the hopper wants to go out and dabble in the water4 ,our usefulness and the welfare of society depend upon our staying in just the place that ,god has put us1 or intended we should occupy4 ,a ,,relic ,,of ,,eden4 ,for more compactness and that we may be more useful we are gathered in still smaller circles in the home group4 ,and there you have the same varieties again2 brothers1 sisters1 husband and wife2 all different in temperaments and tastes4 ,it is fortunate that it should be so4 ,if the husband be all impulse1 the wife must be all prudence4 ,if one sister be sanguine in her temperament1 the other must be lymphatic4 ,mary and ,martha are necessities4 ,there will be no dinner for ,christ if there be no ,martha2 there will be no audience for ,jesus if there be no ,mary4 ,the home organization is most beautifully constructed4 ,eden has gone2 the bowers are all broken down2 the animals that ,adam stroked with his hand that morning when they came up to get their names have since shot forth tusk and sting and growled1 panther at panther2 in mid-air iron beaks plunge till with clotted wing and eyeless sockets the twain come whirling down from under the sun in blood and fire4 ,eden has gone1 but there is just one little fragment left4 ,it floated down on the ,river ,hiddekel out of ,paradise4 ,it is the marriage institution4 ,it does not1 as at the beginning1 take away from man a rib4 ,now it is an addition of ribs4 ,,the ,,home ,,assaulted4 ,this institution of marriage has been defamed in our day1 and influences are abroad trying to turn this earth into a ,turkish harem or a great ,salt ,lake ,city4 ,while the pulpits have been comparatively silent1 novels--their cheapness only equalled by their nastiness--are trying to educate1 have taken upon themselves to educate1 this nation in regard to holy marriage1 which makes or breaks for time and eternity4 ,oh1 this is not a mere question of residence or wardrobe6 ,it is a question charged with gigantic joy or sorrow1 with heaven or hell4 ,alas for this new dispensation of ,george ,sands6 ,alas for the mingling of the nightshade with the marriage garlands6 ,alas for the venom of adders spit into the tankards6 ,alas for the white frosts of eternal death that kill the orange blossoms6 ,the ,gospel of ,jesus ,christ is to assert what is right and to assert what is wrong4 ,,the ,,assault ,,of ,,the ,,sordid4 ,attempt has been made to take the marriage institution1 which was intended for the happiness and elevation of the race1 and make it a mere commercial enterprise2 an exchange of houses and lands and equipage2 a business partnership of two1 stuffed up with the stories of romance and knight-errantry1 and unfaithfulness and feminine angelhood4 ,the two after a while have roused up to find that1 instead of the paradise they dreamed of1 they have got nothing but a ,van ,amburgh's menagerie1 filled with tigers and wild-cats4 ,twenty thousand divorces in ,paris in one year preceded the worst revolution that ,france ever saw4 ,it was only the first course in that banquet of hell2 and ,i tell you what you know as well as ,i do1 that wrong notions on the subject of ,christian marriage are the cause at this day of more moral outrage before ,god and man than any other cause4 ,there are some things that ,i want to bring before you4 ,i know there are those of you who have had homes set up for a great many years2 and then there are those here who have just established their home4 ,they have only been in it a few months or a few years4 ,then there are those who will1 after awhile1 set up for themselves a home1 and it is right that ,i should speak out upon these themes4 ,,the ,,beneficent ,,guest4 ,my first counsel to you is1 have ,jesus in your new home1 if it be a new home1 and let ,him who was a guest at ,bethany be in your household2 let the divine blessing drop upon your every hope and plan and expectation4 ,those young people who begin with ,god end with heaven4 ,have on your right hand the engagement ring of the divine affection4 ,if one of you be a ,christian1 let that one take a ,bible and read a few verses in the evening-time1 and then kneel down and commend yourselves to ,him who setteth the solitary in families4 ,i want to tell you that the destroying angel passes by without touching or entering the door-post sprinkled with the blood of the everlasting covenant4 ,why is it that in some families they never get along1 and in others they always get along well8 ,i have watched such cases1 and have come to a conclusion4 ,in the first instance1 nothing seemed to go pleasantly1 and after awhile came devastation1 domestic disaster or estrangement4 ,why8 ,they started wrong6 ,in the other case1 although there were hardships and trials1 and some things that had to be explained1 still things went on pleasantly until the very last4 ,why8 ,they started right6 ,,forbearance ,,needed4 ,my advice to you in your home is to exercise to the very last possibility of your nature the law of forbearance4 ,prayers in the household will not make up for everything4 ,some of the best people in the world are the hardest to get along with4 ,there are people who stand up in prayer-meetings and pray like angels1 who at home are uncompromising and cranky4 ,you may not have everything just as you want it4 ,sometimes it will be the duty of the husband1 and sometimes of the wife1 to yield2 but both stand punctiliously on your rights1 and you will have a ,waterloo with no ,blucher coming up at nightfall to decide the conflict4 ,a ,,grandfather',s ,,apology4 ,never be ashamed to apologize when you have done wrong in domestic affairs4 ,let that be a law of your household4 ,the best thing ,i ever heard of my grandfather1 whom ,i never saw1 was this3 that once1 having unrighteously rebuked one of his children1 he himself having lost his patience1 and1 perhaps1 having been misinformed of the child's doings1 found out his mistake1 and in the evening of the same day gathered all his family together1 and said3 ,now ,i have one explanation to make1 and one thing to say4 ,thomas1 this morning1 ,i rebuked you very unfairly4 ,i am very sorry for it4 ,i rebuked you in the presence of the whole family1 and now ,i ask your forgiveness in their presence4 ,it must have taken some courage to do that4 ,it was right1 was it not8 ,never be ashamed to apologize for domestic inaccuracy4 ,find out the points2 what are the weak points1 if ,i may call them so1 of your companion1 and then stand aloof from them4 ,do not carry the fire of your temper too near the gunpowder4 ,if the wife be easily fretted by disorder in the household1 let the husband be careful where he throws his slippers4 ,if the husband come home from the store with his patience all exhausted1 do not let the wife unnecessarily cross his temper2 but both stand up for your rights1 and ,i will promise the everlasting sound of the war-whoop4 ,your life will be spent in making up1 and marriage will be to you an unmitigated curse4 ,cowper said3 ,the kindest and the happiest pair ,will find occasion to forbear2 ,and something every day they live1 ,to pity1 and perhaps forgive4 ,i advise1 also1 that you make your chief pleasure circle around about that home4 ,it is unfortunate when it is otherwise4 ,if the husband spend the most of his nights away from home1 of choice1 and not of necessity1 he is not the head of the household2 he is only the cashier4 ,if the wife throw the cares of the household in the servant's lap1 and then spend five nights of the week at the opera or theatre1 she may clothe her children with satins and laces and ribbons that would confound a ,french milliner1 but they are orphans4 ,oh1 it is sad when a child has to say its prayers alone because mother has gone off to the evening entertainment6 ,in ,india they bring children and throw them to the crocodiles1 and it seems very cruel2 but the jaws of ,new ,york and ,brooklyn dissipation are swallowing down more little children to-day than all the monsters that ever crawled upon the banks of the ,ganges6 ,a ,,godless ,,mother',s ,,grief4 ,i have seen the sorrow of a godless mother on the death of a child she had neglected4 ,it was not so much grief that she felt from the fact that the child was dead as the fact that she had neglected it4 ,she said3 ,if ,i had only watched over and cared for the child1 ,i know ,god would not have taken it4 ,the tears came not2 it was a dry1 blistering tempest--a scorching simoon of the desert4 ,when she wrung her hands it seemed as if she would twist her fingers from their sockets2 when she seized her hair it seemed as if she had1 in wild terror1 grasped a coiling serpent with her right hand4 ,no tears6 ,comrades of the little one came in and wept over the coffin2 neighbors came in1 and the moment they saw the still face of the child the shower broke4 ,no tears for her4 ,god gives tears as the summer rain to the parched soul2 but in all the universe the driest and hottest1 the most scorching and consuming thing is a mother's heart if she has neglected her child1 when once it is dead4 ,god may forgive her1 but she will never forgive herself4 ,the memory will sink the eyes deeper into the sockets1 and pinch the face1 and whiten the hair1 and eat up the heart with vultures that will not be satisfied1 forever plunging deeper their iron beaks4 ,oh1 you wanderers from your home1 go back to your duty6 ,the brightest flowers in all the earth are those which grow in the garden of a ,christian household1 clambering over the porch of a ,christian home4 ,,matrimonial ,,congeniality4 ,i advise you also to cultivate sympathy of occupation4 ,sir ,james ,mackintosh1 one of the most eminent and elegant men that ever lived1 while standing at the very height of his eminence1 said to a great company of scholars3 ,my wife made me4 ,the wife ought to be the advising partner in every firm4 ,she ought to be interested in all the losses and gains of shop and store4 ,she ought to have a right--she has a right--to know everything4 ,if a man goes into a business transaction that he dare not tell his wife of1 you may depend that he is on the way either to bankruptcy or moral ruin4 ,there may be some things which he does not wish to trouble his wife with2 but if he dare not tell her1 he is on the road to discomfiture4 ,on the other hand1 the husband ought to be sympathetic with the wife's occupation4 ,it is no easy thing to keep house4 ,many a woman that could have endured martyrdom as well as ,margaret1 the ,scotch girl1 has actually been worn out by house management4 ,there are a thousand martyrs of the kitchen4 ,it is very annoying1 after the vexations of the day1 around the stove or the table1 or in the nursery or parlor1 to have your husband say3 ,you know nothing about trouble2 you ought to be in the store half an hour4 ,sympathy of occupation6 ,if the husband's work cover him with the soot of the furnace or the odors of leather or soap factories1 let not the wife be easily disgusted at the begrimed hands or unsavory aroma4 ,your gains are one1 your interests are one1 your losses are one2 lay hold of the work of life with both hands4 ,four hands to fight the battles2 four eyes to watch for the danger2 four shoulders on which to carry the trials4 ,it is a very sad thing when the painter has a wife who does not like pictures4 ,it is a very sad thing for a pianist when she has a husband who does not like music4 ,,genteel ,,business4 ,it is a very sad thing when a wife is not suited unless her husband has what is called a genteel business4 ,so far as ,i understand a genteel business1 it is something to which a man goes at ten o'clock in the morning1 and from which he comes home at two or three o'clock in the afternoon1 and gets a large amount of money for doing nothing4 ,that is1 ,i believe1 a genteel business2 and there has been many a wife who has made the mistake of not being satisfied until the husband has given up the tanning of the hides1 or the turning of the banisters1 or the building of the walls1 and put himself in circles where he has nothing to do but smoke cigars and drink wine1 and get himself into habits that upset him1 going down in the maelstrom1 taking his wife and children with him4 ,there are a good many trains running from earth to destruction4 ,they start all the hours of the day1 and all the hours of the night4 ,there are the freight trains2 they go very slowly and very heavily2 and there are the accommodation trains going on toward destruction1 and they stop very often and let a man get out when he wants to4 ,but genteel idleness is an express train2 ,satan is the stoker1 and ,death is the engineer2 and though one may come out in front of it and swing the red flag of danger1 or the lantern of ,god's ,word1 it makes just one shot into perdition1 coming down the embankment with a shout and a wail and a shriek--crash1 crash6 ,there are two classes of people sure of destruction3 ,first1 those who have nothing to do2 secondly1 those who have something to do1 but are too lazy or too proud to do it4 ,,love ,,to ,,preside4 ,i have one more word of advice to give to those who would have a happy home1 and that is1 let love preside in it4 ,when your behavior in the domestic circle becomes a mere matter of calculation2 when the caress you give is merely the result of deliberate study of the position you occupy1 happiness lies stark dead on the hearthstone4 ,when the husband's position as head of the household is maintained by loudness of voice1 by strength of arm1 by fire of temper1 the republic of domestic bliss has become a despotism that neither ,god nor man will abide4 ,oh1 ye who promised to love each other at the altar1 how dare you commit perjury8 ,let no shadow of suspicion come on your affection4 ,it is easier to kill that flower than it is to make it live again4 ,the blast from hell that puts out that light leaves you in the blackness of darkness forever4 ,a ,,house ,,not ,a ,,home4 ,here are a man and wife2 they agree in nothing else1 but they agree they will have a home4 ,they will have a splendid house1 and they think that if they have a house they will have a home4 ,architects make the plan1 and the mechanics execute it2 the house to cost one hundred thousand dollars4 ,it is done4 ,the carpets are spread1 lights are hoisted1 curtains are hung1 cards of invitation sent out4 ,the horses in gold-plated harness prance at the gate2 guests come in and take their places2 the flute sounds2 the dancers go up and down2 and with one grand whirl the wealth and the fashion and the mirth of the great town wheel amidst the pictured walls4 ,ha6 this is happiness4 ,float it on the smoking viands2 sound it in the music2 whirl it in the dance2 cast it on the snow of sculpture2 sound it up the brilliant stairway2 flash it in chandeliers6 ,happiness1 indeed6 ,let us build on the centre of the parlor floor a throne to ,happiness2 let all the guests1 when they come in1 bring their flowers and pearls and diamonds1 and throw them on this pyramid1 and let it be a throne2 and then let ,happiness1 the ,queen1 mount the throne1 and we will stand around and1 all chalices lifted1 we will say3 ,drink1 ,o ,queen6 live forever6 ,,lights ,,out4 ,but the guests depart1 the flutes are breathless1 the last clash of the impatient hoofs is heard in the distance1 and the twain of the household come back to see the ,queen of ,happiness on the throne amid the parlor floor4 ,but1 alas6 as they come back the flowers have faded1 the sweet odors have become the smell of a charnel-house1 and instead of the ,queen of ,happiness there sits there the gaunt form of ,anguish1 with bitten lip and sunken eye1 and ashes in her hair4 ,the romp and joyous step of the dancers who have left seems rumbling yet1 like jarring thunders that quake the floor and rattle the glasses of the feast1 rim to rim4 ,the spilled wine on the floor turns into blood4 ,the wreaths of plush have become wriggling reptiles4 ,terrors catch tangled in the canopy that overhangs the couch4 ,a strong gust of wind comes through the hall and the drawing-room and the bed-chamber1 in which all the lights go out4 ,and from the lips of the wine-beakers come the words3 ,happiness is not in us6 ,and the arches respond3 ,it is not in us6 ,and the silenced instruments of music1 thrummed on by invisible fingers1 answer3 ,happiness is not in us6 ,and the frozen lips of ,anguish break open1 and1 seated on the throne of wilted flowers1 she strikes her bony hands together1 and groans3 ,it is not in me6 ,,happiness ,,in ,,poverty4 ,that very night a clerk with a salary of a thousand dollars a year--only one thousand--goes to his home1 set up three months ago1 just after the marriage-day4 ,love meets him at the door2 love sits with him at the table2 love talks over the work of the day2 love takes down the ,bible1 and reads of ,him who came our souls to save2 and they kneel1 and while they are kneeling--right in that plain room1 on that plain carpet--the angels of ,god build a throne1 not out of flowers that perish and fade away1 but out of garlands of heaven1 wreath on top of wreath1 amaranth on amaranth1 until the throne is done4 ,then the harps of ,god sounded1 and suddenly there appeared one who mounted the throne1 with eye so bright and brow so fair that the twain knew it was ,christian ,love4 ,and they knelt at the throne1 and1 putting one hand on each head1 she blessed them1 and said3 ,happiness is with me6 ,and that throne of celestial bloom withered not with the passing years2 and the queen left not the throne till one day the married pair felt stricken in years--felt themselves called away1 and knew not which way to go1 and the queen bounded from the throne1 and said3 ,follow me1 and ,i will show you the way up to the realm of everlasting love4 ,and so they went up to sing songs of love1 and walk on pavements of love1 and to live together in mansions of love1 and to rejoice forever in the truth that ,god is love4 ,,hotels ,,versus ,,homes4 ,and brought him to an inn1 and took care of him4 ,and on the morrow when he departed1 he took out two pence1 and gave them to the host1 and said unto him1 ,take care of him2 and whatsoever thou spendest more1 when ,i come again1 ,i will repay thee4--,,luke #aj3cd1 #ce4 ,this is the good ,samaritan paying the hotel bill of a man who had been robbed and almost killed by bandits4 ,the good ,samaritan had found the unfortunate on a lonely1 rocky road1 where1 to this very day1 depredations are sometimes committed upon travelers1 and had put the injured man into the saddle1 while this merciful and well-to-do man had walked till they got to the hotel1 and the wounded man was put to bed and cared for4 ,it must have been a very superior hotel in its accommodations1 for1 though in the country1 the landlord was paid at the rate of what in our country would be four or five dollars a day1 a penny being then a day's wages1 and the two pennies paid in this case about two days' wages4 ,moreover1 it was one of those kind-hearted landlords who are wrapped up in the happiness of their guests1 because the good ,samaritan leaves the poor wounded fellow to his entire care1 promising that when he came that way again he would pay all the bills until the invalid got well4 ,,the ,,value ,,of ,,hotels4 ,hotels and boarding-houses are necessities4 ,in very ancient times they were unknown1 because the world had comparatively few inhabitants1 who were not much given to travel1 and private hospitality met all the wants of sojourners1 as when ,abraham rushed out at ,mamre to invite the three men to sit down to a dinner of veal2 as when the people were positively commanded to be given to hospitality2 as in many of the places in the ,east these ancient customs are practiced to-day4 ,but we have now hotels presided over by good landlords1 and boarding-houses presided over by excellent host or hostess1 in all neighborhoods1 villages and cities1 and it is our congratulation that those of our land surpass all other lands4 ,they rightly become the permanent residences of many people1 such as those who are without families1 such as those whose business keeps them migratory1 such as those who ought not1 for various reasons of health or peculiarity of circumstances1 take upon themselves the cares of housekeeping4 ,,queenly ,,caterers4 ,many a man falling sick in one of these boarding-houses or hotels has been kindly watched and nursed2 and by the memory of her own sufferings and losses the lady at the head of such a house has done all that a mother could do for a sick child1 and the slumberless eye of ,god sees and appreciates her sacrifices in behalf of the stranger4 ,among the most marvelous cases of patience and ,christian fidelity are many of those who keep boarding-houses1 enduring without resentment the unreasonable demands of their guests for expensive food and attentions for which they are not willing to pay an equivalent--a lot of cranky men and women who are not worthy to tie the shoe of their queenly caterer4 ,the outrageous way in which boarders sometimes act to their landlords and landladies show that these critical guests had bad early rearing1 and that in the making-up of their natures all that constitutes the gentleman and lady were left out4 ,some of the most princely men and some of the most elegant women that ,i know of to-day keep hotels and boarding-houses4 ,but one of the great evils of this day is found in the fact that a large population of our towns and cities are giving up and have given up their homes and taken apartments1 that they may have more freedom from domestic duties and more time for social life1 and because they like the whirl of publicity better than the quiet and privacy of a residence they can call their own4 ,the lawful use of these hotels and boarding-houses is for most people while they are in transitu3 but as a terminus they are in many cases demoralization1 utter and complete4 ,that is the point at which families innumerable have begun to disintegrate4 ,there never has been a time when so many families1 healthy and abundantly able to support and direct homes of their own1 have struck tent and taken permanent abode in these public establishments4 ,it is an evil wide as ,christendom1 and by voice and through the newspaper press ,i utter warning and burning protest1 and ask ,almighty ,god to bless the word1 whether in the hearing or reading4 ,,promoters ,,of ,,gossip4 ,in these public caravanseries the demon of gossip is apt to get full sway4 ,all the boarders run daily the gauntlet of general inspection--how they look when they come down in the morning and when they get in at night1 and what they do for a living1 and whom they receive as guests in their rooms1 and what they wear1 and what they do not wear1 and how they eat1 and what they eat1 and how much they eat1 and how little they eat4 ,if a man proposes in such a place to be isolated and reticent and alone1 they will begin to guess about him3 ,who is he8 ,where did he come from8 ,how long is he going to stay8 ,has he paid his board8 ,how much does he pay8 ,perhaps he has committed some crime and does not want it to be known2 there must be something wrong about him1 or he would speak4 ,the whole house goes into the detective business4 ,they must find out about him4 ,they must find out about him right away4 ,if he leave his door unlocked by accident he will find that his rooms have been inspected1 his trunk explored1 his letters folded differently from the way they were folded when he put them away4 ,who is he8 is the question1 asked with intenser interest1 until the subject has become a monomania4 ,the simple fact is1 that he is nobody in particular1 but minds his own business4 ,the best landlords and landladies cannot sometimes hinder their places from becoming ,a ,,pandemonium of whisperers1 and reputations are torn to tatters1 and evil suspicions are aroused1 and scandals started1 and the parliament of the family is blown to atoms by some ,guy ,fawkes who was not caught in time1 as was his ,english predecessor of gunpowdery reputation4 ,the reason is that while in private homes families have so much to keep them busy1 in these promiscuous and multitudinous residences there are so many who have nothing to do1 and that always makes mischief4 ,they gather in each other's rooms and spend hours in consultation about others4 ,if they had to walk a half mile before they got to the willing ear of some listener to detraction they would get out of breath before reaching there1 and not feel in full glow of animosity or slander1 or might1 because of the distance1 not go at all4 ,but rooms #bj1 #ba1 #bb1 #bc1 #bd and #be are on the same corridor1 and when one carrion crow goes ,caw6 ,caw6 all the other crows hear it and flock together over the same carcass4 ,oh1 ,i have heard something rich6 ,sit down and let me tell you all about it4 ,and the first guffaw increases the gathering1 and it has to be told all over again1 and as they separate each carries a spark from the altar of ,gab to some other circle1 until from the coal-heaver in the cellar to the maid in the top room of the garret all are aware of the defamation1 and that evening all who leave the house will bear it to other houses1 until autumnal fires sweeping across ,illinois prairies are less raging and swift than that flame of consuming reputation blazing across the village or city4 ,those of us who were brought up in the country know that the old-fashioned hatching of eggs in the hay-mow required four or five weeks of brooding1 but there are new modes of hatching by machinery1 which take less time and do the work in wholesale4 ,so1 while the private home may brood into life an occasional falsity1 and take a long time to do it1 many of the boarding-houses and family hotels afford a swifter and more multitudinous style of moral incubation1 and one old gossip will get off the nest after one hour's brooding1 clucking a flock of thirty lies after her1 each one picking up its little worm of juicy regalement4 ,it is no advantage to hear too much about your neighbors1 for your time will be so much occupied in taking care of their faults that you will have no time to look after your own4 ,and while you are pulling the chickweed out of their garden yours will get all overgrown with horse-sorrel and mullen stalks4 ,a ,,wrong ,,to ,,children4 ,one of the worst damages that comes from the herding of so many people into boarding-houses and family hotels is inflicted upon children4 ,it is only another way of bringing them up on the commons4 ,while you have your own private house you can1 for the most part1 control their companionship and their whereabouts2 but by twelve years of age in these public resorts they will have picked up all the bad things that can be furnished by the prurient minds of dozens of people4 ,they will overhear blasphemies1 and see quarrels1 and get precocious in sin1 and what the bartender does not tell them the porter or hostler or bell-boy will4 ,beside that1 the children will go out into this world without the restraining1 anchoring1 steadying and all-controlling memory of a home4 ,from that none of us who have been blessed of such memory have escaped4 ,it grips a man for eighty years1 if he lives so long4 ,it pulls him back from doors into which he otherwise would enter4 ,it smites him with contrition in the very midst of his dissipations4 ,as the fish already surrounded by ,,the ,,long ,,wide ,,net swim out to sea1 thinking they can go as far as they please1 and with gay toss of silvery scale they defy the sportsman on the beach1 and after a while the fishermen begin to draw in the net1 hand over hand1 and hand over hand1 and it is a long while before the captured fins begin to feel the net1 and then they dart this way and that1 hoping to get out1 but find themselves approaching the shore1 and are brought up to the very feet of the captors1 so the memory of an early home sometimes seems to relax and let men out further and further from ,god and further and further from shore--five years1 ten years1 twenty years1 thirty years2 but some day they find an irresistible mesh drawing them back1 and they are compelled to retreat from their prodigality and wandering2 and though they make desperate effort to escape the impression1 and try to dive deeper down in sin1 after a while are brought clear back and held upon the ,rock of ,ages4 ,if it be possible1 ,o father and mother6 let your sons and daughters go out into the world under the semi-omnipotent memory of a good1 pure home4 ,about your two or three rooms in a boarding-house or a family hotel you can cast no such glorious sanctity4 ,they will think of these public caravanseries as an early stopping place1 malodorous with old victuals1 coffees perpetually steaming1 and meats in everlasting stew or broil1 the air surcharged with carbonic acid1 and corridors along which drunken boarders come staggering at one o'clock in the morning1 rapping at the door till the affrighted wife lets them in4 ,do not be guilty of the sacrilege or blasphemy of calling such a place a home4 ,,what ,a ,,home ,,is4 ,a home is four walls enclosing one family with identity of interest1 and a privacy from outside inspection so complete that it is a world in itself1 no one entering except by permission--bolted and barred and chained against all outside inquisitiveness4 ,the phrase so often used in law books and legal circles is mightily suggestive--every man's house is his castle4 ,as much so as though it had drawbridge1 portcullis1 redoubt1 bastion and armed turret4 ,even the officer of the law may not enter to serve a writ1 except the door be voluntarily opened unto him2 burglary1 or the invasion of it1 a crime so offensive that the law clashes its iron jaws on any one who attempts it4 ,unless it be necessary to stay for longer or shorter time in family hotel or boarding-house--and there are thousands of instances in which it is necessary1 as ,i showed you at the beginning--unless in this exceptional case1 let neither wife nor husband consent to such permanent residence4 ,,hazardous ,,to ,,morals4 ,the probability is that the wife will have to divide her husband's time with public smoking or reading room1 or with some coquettish spider in search of unwary flies2 and if you do not entirely lose your husband it will be because he is divinely protected from the disasters that have whelmed thousands of husbands with as good intentions as yours4 ,neither should the husband1 without imperative reason1 consent to such a life unless he is sure his wife can withstand the temptation of social dissipation which sweeps across such places with the force of the ,atlantic ,ocean when driven by a ,september equinox4 ,many wives give up their homes for these public residences so that they may give their entire time to operas1 theatres1 balls1 receptions and levees1 and they are in a perpetual whirl1 like a whip-top1 spinning round and round and round very prettily until it loses its equipoise and shoots off into a tangent4 ,but the difference is1 in one case it is a top and in the other a soul4 ,,the ,,lares ,,and ,,penates4 ,beside this there is an assiduous accumulation of little things around the private home which in the aggregate make a great attraction1 while the denizen of one of these public residences is apt to say3 ,what is the use8 ,i have no place to keep them if ,i should take them4 ,mementoes1 bric-a-brac1 curiosities1 quaint chair or cosy lounge1 upholsteries1 pictures1 and a thousand things that accrete in a home are discarded or neglected because there is no homestead in which to arrange them4 ,and yet they are the case in which the pearl of domestic happiness is set4 ,you can never become as attached to the appointments of a boarding-house or family hotel as to those things that you can call your own1 and are associated with the different members of your household1 or with scenes of thrilling import in your domestic history4 ,blessed is that home in which for a whole lifetime they have been gathering until every figure in the carpet1 and every panel of the door1 and every casement of the window has a chirography of its own1 speaking out something about father or mother1 or son or daughter1 or friend that was with us a while4 ,what a sacred place it becomes when one can say3 ,in that room such a one was born2 in that bed such a one died2 in that chair ,i sat on the night ,i heard such a one had received a great public honor2 by that stool my child knelt for her last evening prayer2 here ,i sat to greet my son as he came back from a sea voyage2 that was father's cane2 that was mother's rocking chair4 ,what a joyful and pathetic congress of reminiscences6 ,,hospitality ,,curtailed4 ,the public residence of hotel and boarding-house abolishes the grace of hospitality4 ,your guest does not want to come to such a table4 ,no one wants to run such a gauntlet of acute and merciless hyper-criticism4 ,unless you have a home of your own you will not be able to exercise the best rewarded of all the graces4 ,for exercise of this grace what blessing came to the ,shunamite in the restoration of her son to life because she entertained ,elisha1 and to the widow of ,zarephath in the perpetual oil well of the miraculous cruise because she fed a hungry prophet1 and to ,rahab in the preservation of her life at the demolition of ,jericho because she entertained the spies and to ,laban in the formation of an interesting family relation because of his entertainment of ,jacob1 and to ,lot in his rescue from the destroyed city because of his entertainment of the angels1 and to ,mary and ,martha and ,zaccheus in spiritual blessing because they entertained ,christ1 and to ,publius in the island of ,melita in the healing of his father because of the entertainment of ,paul drenched from the shipwreck1 and of innumerable houses throughout ,christendom upon which have come blessings from generation to generation because their doors swung easily open in the enlarging1 ennobling1 irradiating1 and divine grace of hospitality4 ,i do not know what your experience has been1 but ,i have had men and women visiting at my house who left a benediction on every room--in the blessing they asked at the table1 in the prayer they offered at the family altar1 in the good advice they gave the children1 in the gospelization that looked out from every lineament of their countenances2 and their departure was the sword of bereavement4 ,the ,queen of ,norway1 ,sweden and ,denmark had a royal ,,cup ,,of ,,ten ,,curves1 or lips1 each one having on it the name of the distinguished person who had drank from it4 ,and that cup which we offer to others in ,christian hospitality1 though it be of the plainest earthenware1 is a royal cup1 and ,god can read on all its sides the names of those who have taken from it refreshment4 ,but all this is impossible unless you have a home of your own4 ,it is the delusion as to what is necessary for a home that hinders so many from establishing one4 ,thirty rooms are not necessary1 nor twenty1 nor fifteen1 nor ten1 nor five1 nor three4 ,in the right way plant a table1 and couch1 and knife and fork1 and a cup1 and a chair1 and you can raise a young paradise4 ,just start a home1 on however small a scale1 and it will grow4 ,when ,king ,cyrus was invited to dine with an humble friend the king made the one condition of his coming that the only dish be one loaf of bread1 and the most imperial satisfactions have sometimes banqueted on the plainest fare4 ,do not be caught in the delusion of many thousands in postponing a home until they can have an expensive one4 ,that idea is the devil's trap that catches men and women innumerable who will never have any home at all4 ,capitalists of ,america1 build plain homes for the people4 ,let this tenement-house system1 in which hundreds of thousands of the people of our cities are wallowing in the mire1 be broken up by small homes1 where people can have their own firesides and their own altar4 ,in this great continent there is room enough for every man and woman to have a home4 ,morals and civilization and religion demand it4 ,,small ,,homes ,,needed ,we want done all over this land what ,george ,peabody and ,lady ,burdett-,coutts did in ,england1 and some of the large manufacturers of this country have done for the villages and cities1 in building small houses at cheap rents1 so that the middle classes can have separate homes4 ,they are the only class not provided for4 ,the rich have their palaces1 and the poor have their poorhouses1 and criminals have their jails2 but what about the honest middle classes1 who are able and willing to work1 and yet have small income8 ,let the capitalists1 inspired of ,god and pure patriotism1 rise and build whole streets of small residences4 ,the laborer may have1 at the close of the day1 to walk or ride further than is desirable to reach it1 but when he gets to his destination in the eventide he will find something worthy of being called by that glorious and impassioned and heaven-descended word1 home4 ,,something ,,to ,,save ,,for4 ,young married man1 as soon as you can buy such a place1 even if you have to put on it a mortgage reaching from base to cap-stone4 ,the much abused mortgage1 which is ruin to a reckless man1 to one prudent and provident is the beginning of a competency and a fortune1 for the reason he will not be satisfied until he has paid it off1 and all the household are put on stringent economies until then4 ,deny yourself all superfluities and all luxuries until you can say3 ,everything in this house is mine1 thank ,god6--every timber1 every brick1 every foot of plumbing1 every door-sill4 ,do not have your children born in a boarding-house1 and do not yourself be buried from one4 ,have a place where your children can shout and sing and romp without being overhauled for the racket4 ,have a kitchen where you can do something toward the reformation of evil cookery and the lessening of this nation of dyspeptics4 ,as ,napoleon lost one of his great battles by an attack of indigestion1 so many men have such ,a ,,daily ,,wrestle with the food swallowed that they have no strength left for the battle of life2 and though your wife may know how to play on all musical instruments1 and rival a prima donna1 she is not well educated unless she can boil an ,irish potato and broil a mutton-chop1 since the diet sometimes decides the fate of families and nations4 ,have a sitting-room with at least one easy chair1 even though you have to take turns at sitting in it1 and books out of the public library or of your own purchase for the making of your family intelligent1 and checkerboards and guessing matches1 with an occasional blind man's buff1 which is of all games my favorite4 ,rouse up your home with all styles of innocent mirth1 and gather up in your children's nature a reservoir of exuberance that will pour down refreshing streams when life gets parched1 and the dark days come1 and the lights go out1 and the laughter is smothered into a sob4 ,,christ ,,in ,,the ,,home4 ,first1 last and all the time1 have ,christ in your home4 ,julius ,caesar calmed the fears of an affrighted boatman who was rowing him in a stream by stating3 ,so long as ,caesar is with you in the same boat no harm can happen4 ,and whatever storm of adversity or bereavement or poverty may strike your home all is well as long as you have ,christ the ,king on board4 ,make your home so far-reaching in its influence that down to the last moment of your children's life you may hold them with a heavenly charm4 ,at seventy-six years of age the ,demosthenes of the ,american ,senate lay dying at ,washington--,i mean ,henry ,clay1 of ,kentucky4 ,his pastor sat at his bedside and the old man eloquent1 after a long and exciting public life1 trans-,atlantic and cis-,atlantic1 was back again in the scenes of his boyhood1 and he kept saying in his dream over and over again3 ,my mother6 mother6 mother6 ,may the parental influence we exert be not only potential but holy1 and so the home on earth be the vestibule of our home in heaven1 in which place may we all meet--father1 mother1 son1 daughter1 brother1 sister1 grandfather and grandmother1 and grandchild1 and the entire group of precious ones1 of whom we must say in the words of transporting ,charles ,wesley3 ,one family we dwell in ,him1 ,one church above1 beneath2 ,though now divided by the stream-- ,the narrow stream of death2 ,one army of the living ,god1 ,to ,his command we bow2 ,part of the host have crossed the flood1 ,and part are crossing now4 ,,easy ,,divorce4 ,what therefore ,god hath joined together let not man put asunder4--,,matthew #ai3f ,that there are hundreds and thousands of infelicitous homes in ,america no one will doubt4 ,if there were only one skeleton in the closet1 that might be locked up and abandoned2 but in many a home there is a skeleton in the hallway and a skeleton in all the apartments4 ,,unhappily ,,married are two words descriptive of many a homestead4 ,it needs no orthodox minister to prove to a badly mated pair that there is a hell2 they are there now4 ,sometimes a grand and gracious woman will be thus incarcerated1 and her life will be a crucifixion1 as was the case with ,mrs4 ,sigourney1 the great poetess and the great soul4 ,sometimes a consecrated man will be united to a fury1 as was ,john ,wesley1 or united to a vixen1 as was ,john ,milton4 ,sometimes1 and generally1 both parties are to blame1 and ,thomas ,carlyle is an intolerable scold1 and his wife smokes and swears1 and ,froude1 the historian1 is mean enough1 because of the shekels he gets for the manuscript1#c to pull aside the curtain from the lifelong squabble at ,craigenputtock and ,five1 ,cheyne ,row4 ,some say that for ,,the ,,alleviation of all these domestic disorders of which we hear1 easy divorce is a good prescription4 ,god sometimes authorizes divorce as certainly as ,he authorizes marriage4 ,i have just as much regard for one lawfully divorced as ,i have for one lawfully married4 ,but you know and ,i know that wholesale divorce is one of ,,our ,,national ,,scourges4 ,i am not surprised at this when ,i think of the influences which have been abroad militating against the marriage relation4 ,for many years the platforms of the country rang with talk about a free-love millennium4 ,there were meetings of this kind held in the ,academy of ,music1 ,brooklyn1 ,cooper ,institute1 ,new ,york1 ,tremont ,temple1 ,boston1 and all over the land4 ,some of the women who were most prominent in that movement have since been distinguished for great promiscuosity of affection4 ,popular themes for such occasions were the tyranny of man1 the oppression of the marriage relation1 women's rights1 and the affinities4 ,prominent speakers were women with short curls and short dress and very long tongue1 everlastingly at war with ,god because they were created women2 while on the platform sat meek men with soft accent and cowed demeanor1 apologetic for masculinity1 and holding the parasols while the termagant orators went on preaching the gospel of free love4 ,that campaign of about twenty years set more devils in the marriage relation than will be exorcised in the next fifty4 ,men and women went home from such meetings so permanently confused as to who were their wives and husbands that they never got out of the perplexity1 and the criminal and the civil courts tried to disentangle the ,iliad of woes1 and this one got alimony1 and that one got a limited divorce1 and this mother kept the children on condition that the father could sometimes come and look at them1 and these went into poorhouses1 and those went into an insane asylum1 and those went into dissolute public life1 and all went to destruction4 ,the mightiest war ever made against the marriage institution was that free-love campaign1 sometimes under one name and sometimes under another4 ,another influence that has warred upon the marriage relation has been ,,polygamy ,,in ,,utah4 ,that is a stereotyped caricature of the marriage relation1 and has poisoned the whole land4 ,you might as well think that you can have an arm in a state of mortification and yet the whole body not be sickened1 as to have those territories polygamized and yet the body of the nation not feel the putrefaction4 ,hear it1 good men and women of ,america1 that so long ago as #ahfb a law was passed by ,congress forbidding polygamy in the territories and in all the places where they had jurisdiction4 ,twenty-two years have passed along and five administrations1 armed with all the power of government1 and having an army at their disposal1 and yet the first brick has not been knocked from that fortress of libertinism4 ,every new ,president in his inaugural has tickled that monster with the straw of condemnation1 and every ,congress has stultified itself in proposing some plan that would not work4 ,polygamy stands in ,utah and in other of the territories to-day more entrenched1 and more brazen1 and more puissant1 and more braggart1 and more infernal1 than at any time in its history4 ,james ,buchanan1 a much-abused man of his day1 did more for the extirpation of this villainy than all the subsequent administrations have dared to do4 ,mr4 ,buchanan sent out an army1 and although it was halted in its work1 still he accomplished more than the subsequent administrations1 which have done nothing but talk1 talk1 talk4 ,i want the people of ,america to know that for twenty-two years we have had a positive law prohibiting polygamy in the territories4 ,people are crying out for some new law1 as though we had not an old law already with which that infamy could be swept into the perdition from which it smoked up4 ,polygamy in ,utah has warred against the marriage relation throughout the land4 ,it is impossible to have such an awful sewer of iniquity sending up its miasma1 which is wafted by the winds north1 south1 east1 and west1 without the whole land being affected by it4 ,another influence that has warred against the marriage relation in this country has been a ,,pustulous ,,literature1 with its millions of sheets every week choked with stories of domestic wrongs1 and infidelities1 and massacres1 and outrages1 until it is a wonder to me that there are any decencies or any common-sense left on the subject of marriage4 ,one-half of the news-stands of ,brooklyn and ,new ,york and all our cities reeking with the filth4 ,now1 say some1 we admit all these evils1 and the only way to clear them out or correct them is by easy divorce4 ,well1 before we yield to that cry1 let us find out ,,how ,,easy ,,it ,,is ,,now4 ,i have looked over the laws of all the ,states1 and ,i find that while in some ,states it is easier than in others1 in every ,state it is easy4 ,the ,state of ,illinois through its legislature recites a long list of proper causes for divorce1 and then closes up by giving to the courts the right to make a decree of divorce in any case where they deem it expedient4 ,after that you are not surprised at the announcement that in one county of the ,state of ,illinois1 in one year1 there were #hcc divorces4 ,if you want to know how easy it is you have only to look over the records of the ,states4 ,in ,massachusetts #fjj divorces in one year2 in ,maine #dgh in one year2 in ,connecticut #dja divorces in one year2 in the city of ,san ,francisco #ccc divorces in #ahhj2 in ,new ,england in one year #baac divorces1 and in twenty years in ,new ,england #bj1jjj4 ,is that not easy enough8 ,if the same ratio continue1 the ratio of multiplied divorce and multiplied causes of divorce1 we are not far from the time when our courts will have to set apart whole days for application1 and all you will have to prove against a man will be that he left his slippers in the middle of the floor1 and all you will have to prove against a woman will be that her husband's overcoat was buttonless4 ,causes of divorce doubled in a few years1 doubled in ,france1 doubled in ,england1 and doubled in the ,united ,states4 ,to show how very easy it is ,i have to tell you that in ,western ,reserve1 ,ohio1 the proportion of divorces to marriages celebrated is one to eleven2 in ,rhode ,island is one to thirteen2 in ,vermont is one to fourteen4 ,is not that easy enough8 ,i want you to notice that frequency of divorce always goes along with the dissoluteness of society4 ,rome for five hundred years had not one case of divorce4 ,those were her days of glory and virtue4 ,then the reign of vice began1 and divorce became epidemic4 ,if you want to know how rapidly the ,empire went down1 ask ,gibbon4 ,do you know how the ,reign of ,terror was introduced in ,france8 ,by #bj1jjj cases of divorce in one year in ,paris4 ,,what ,,we ,,want in this country and in all lands is that divorce be made more and more and more difficult4 ,then people before they enter that relation will be persuaded that there will probably be no escape from it except through the door of the sepulchre4 ,then they will pause on the verge of that relation until they are fully satisfied that it is best1 and that it is right1 and that it is happiest4 ,then we shall have no more marriage in fun4 ,then men and women will not enter the relation with the idea it is only a trial trip1 and if they do not like it they can get out at the first landing4 ,then this whole question will be taken out of the frivolous into the tremendous1 and there will be no more joking about the blossoms in a bride's hair than about the cypress on a coffin4 ,what we want is that the ,congress of the ,united ,states at this present session move for the changing the national ,constitution so that a law can be passed which shall be uniform all over the country1 and what shall be right in one ,state shall be right in all the ,states1 and what is wrong in one ,state will be wrong in all the ,states4 ,,how ,,is ,,it ,,now8 ,if a party in the marriage relation gets dissatisfied it is only necessary to move to another ,state to achieve liberation from the domestic tie1 and divorce is effected so easy that the first one party knows of it is by seeing it in the newspaper that ,rev4 ,dr4 ,somebody1 on ,april #ad1 #ahhd1 introduced into a new marriage relation a member of the household who went off on a pleasure excursion to ,newport or a business excursion to ,chicago4 ,married at the bride's house4 ,no cards4 ,there are ,states of the ,union which practically put a premium upon the disintegration of the marriage relation1 while there are other ,states1 like our own ,new ,york ,state1 that has the pre-eminent idiocy of making marriage lawful at twelve and fourteen years of age4 ,the ,congress of the ,united ,states needs to move at the present session for a change of the ,national ,constitution1 and then to appoint a committee--not made up of single gentlemen1 but of men of families and their families in ,washington--who shall prepare a good1 honest1 righteous1 comprehensive1 ,,uniform ,,law that will control everything from ,sandy ,hook to ,golden ,horn4 ,that will put an end to brokerages in marriage4 ,that will send divorce lawyers into a decent business4 ,that will set people agitated for many years on the question of how shall they get away from each other to planning how they can adjust themselves to the more or less unfavorable circumstances4 ,more difficult divorce will put an estoppal to a great extent upon marriage as a financial speculation4 ,there are men who go into the relation just as they go into ,wall ,street to purchase shares4 ,the female to be invited into the partnership of wedlock is utterly unattractive1 and in disposition a suppressed ,vesuvius4 ,everybody knows it1 but this masculine candidate for matrimonial orders1 through the commercial agency or through the county records1 finds out how much estate is to be inherited1 and he calculates it4 ,he thinks out how long it will be before the old man will die1 and whether he can stand the refractory temper until he does die1 and then he enters the relation2 for he says1 ,if ,i cannot stand it1 then through the divorce law ,i'll back out4 ,that process is going on all the time1 and men enter the relation without any moral principle1 without any affection1 and it is as much a matter of stock speculation as anything that transpired yesterday in ,union ,pacific1 ,wabash1 and ,delaware and ,lackawanna4 ,now1 suppose a man understood1 as he ought to understand1 that if he goes into that relation there is no possibility of his getting out1 or no probability1 he would be more slow to put his neck in the yoke4 ,he should say to himself1 ,rather than a ,caribbean whirlwind with a whole fleet of shipping in its arms1 give me a zephyr off fields of sunshine and gardens of peace4 ,rigorous divorce law will also hinder women from ,,the ,,fatal ,,mistake of marrying men to reform them4 ,if a young man by twenty-five years of age or thirty years of age has the habit of strong drink fixed on him1 he is as certainly bound for a drunkard's grave as that a train starting out from ,grand ,central ,depot at #h o'clock to-morrow morning is bound for ,albany4 ,the train may not reach ,albany1 for it may be thrown from the track4 ,the young man may not reach a drunkard's grave1 for something may throw him off the iron track of evil habit2 but the probability is that the train that starts to-morrow morning at #h o'clock for ,albany will get there and the probability is that the young man who has the habit of strong drink fixed on him before twenty-five or thirty years of age will arrive at a drunkard's grave4 ,she knows he drinks1 although he tries to hide it by chewing cloves4 ,everybody knows he drinks4 ,parents warn1 neighbors and friends warn4 ,she will marry him1 she will reform him4 ,if she is unsuccessful in the experiment1 why then the divorce law will emancipate her1 because habitual drunkenness is a cause for divorce in ,indiana1 ,kentucky1 ,florida1 ,connecticut1 and nearly all the ,states4 ,so the poor thing goes to the altar of sacrifice4 ,if you will show me the poverty-struck streets in any city ,i will show you the homes of the women who married men to reform them4 ,in one case out of ten thousand it may be a successful experiment4 ,i never saw the successful experiment4 ,but have a rigorous divorce law1 and that woman will say1 ,if ,i am affianced to that man it is for life2 and if now in the ardor of his young love1 and ,i am the prize to be won1 he will not give up his cups1 when he has won the prize1 surely he will not give up his cups4 ,and so that woman will say to the man1 ,no1 sir1 you are already married to the club1 and you are married to that evil habit1 and so you are married twice1 and you are a bigamist4 ,go6 ,a rigorous divorce law will also do much to hinder hasty and ,,inconsiderate ,,marriages4 ,under the impression that one can be easily released people enter the relation without inquiry and without reflection4 ,romance and impulse rule the day4 ,perhaps the only ground for the marriage compact is that she likes his looks and he admires the graceful way she passes around the ice cream at the picnic6 ,it is all they know about each other4 ,it is all the preparation for life4 ,a man not able to pay his own board bill1 with not a dollar in his possession1 will stand at the altar and take the loving hand1 and say1 ,with all my worldly goods ,i thee endow6 ,a woman that could not make a loaf of bread to save her life will swear to cherish and obey4 ,a ,christian will marry an atheist1 and that always makes conjoined wretchedness2 for if a man does not believe there is a ,god1 he is neither to be trusted with a dollar nor with your lifelong happiness4 ,having read much about love in a cottage people brought up in ease will go and starve in a hovel4 ,runaway matches and elopements1 #iii out of #ajjj of which mean death and hell1 multiplying on all hands4 ,you see them in every day's newspapers4 ,our ministers in this region have no defence such as they have in other cities where the banns must be previously published and an officer of the law must give a certificate that all is right2 so clergymen are left defenceless1 and unite those who ought never to be united4 ,perhaps they are too young or perhaps they are standing already in some domestic compact4 ,by the wreck of ten thousand homes1 by the holocaust of ten thousand sacrificed men and women1 by the hearthstone of the family which is the corner-stone of the ,state1 and in the name of that ,god who hath set up the family institution and who hath made the breaking of the marital oath the most appalling of all perjuries1 ,i implore the ,congress of the ,united ,states to make some righteous1 uniform law for all the ,states and from ocean to ocean1 on this subject of marriage and divorce4 ,,advice ,,to ,,lovers4 ,let me say to the hundreds of young people in this house this morning1 before you give your heart and hand in holy alliance1 use all caution2 inquire outside as to habits1 explore the disposition1 scrutinize the taste1 question the ancestry1 and find out the ambitions4 ,do not take the heroes and the heroines of cheap novels for a model4 ,do not put your lifetime happiness in the keeping of a man who has a reputation for being a little loose in morals or in the keeping of a woman who dresses fast4 ,remember that while good looks are a kindly gift of ,god wrinkles or accident may despoil them4 ,remember that ,byron was no more celebrated for his beauty than for his depravity4 ,remember that ,absalom's hair was not more splendid than his habits were despicable4 ,hear it1 hear it6 ,the only foundation for happy marriage that ever has been or ever will be1 is good character4 ,,ask ,,father ,,and ,,mother',s ,,counsel in this most important step of your life4 ,they are good advisers4 ,they are the best friends you ever had4 ,they made more sacrifices for you than any one else ever did1 and they will do more to-day for your happiness than any other people4 ,ask them1 and1 above all1 ,,ask ,,god4 ,i used to smile at ,john ,brown of ,haddington because when he was about to offer his hand and heart in marriage to one who became his lifelong companion1 he opened the conversation by saying1 ,let us pray4 ,but ,i have seen so many shipwrecks on the sea of matrimony1 ,i have made up my mind that ,john ,brown of ,haddington was right4 ,a union formed in prayer will be a happy union1 though sickness pale the cheek1 and poverty empty the bread tray1 and death open the small graves1 and all the path of life be strewn with thorns1 from the marriage altar with its wedding march and orange blossoms clear on down to the last farewell at that gate where ,isaac and ,rebecca1 ,abraham and ,sarah1 ,adam and ,eve1 parted4 ,and let me say to you who are in this relation1 if you make one man or woman happy you have not lived in vain4 ,christ says that what ,he is to the ,church you ought to be to each other2 and if sometimes through difference of opinion or difference of disposition you make up your mind that your marriage was a mistake1 patiently bear and forbear1 remembering that life at the longest is short and that for those who have been badly mated in this world1 death will give quick and immediate bill of divorcement written in letters of green grass on quiet graves4 ,and perhaps1 my brother1 my sister1 perhaps you may appreciate each other better in heaven than you have appreciated each other on earth4 ,in the ,farm ,ballads our ,american poet puts into the lips of a repentant husband after a life of married perturbation these suggestive words3 ,and when she dies ,i wish that she would be laid by me1 ,and lying together in silence1 perhaps we will agree4 ,and if ever we meet in heaven1 ,i would not think it queer ,if we love each other better because we quarrelled here4 ,and let me say to those of you who are in happy married union1 ,,avoid ,,first ,,quarrels2 have no unexplained correspondence with former admirers2 cultivate no suspicions2 in a moment of bad temper do not rush out and tell the neighbors2 do not let any of those gad-abouts of society unload in your house their baggage of gab and tittle-tattle2 do not stand on your rights2 learn how to apologize2 do not be so proud1 or so stubborn1 or so devilish that you will not make up4 ,remember that the worst domestic misfortunes and most scandalous divorce cases started from little infelicities4 ,the whole piled-up train of ten rail cars telescoped and smashed at the foot of an embankment one hundred feet down came to that catastrophe by getting two or three inches off the track4 ,some of the greatest domestic misfortunes and the widest resounding divorce cases have started from little misunderstandings that were allowed to go on and go on until home1 and respectability1 and religion1 and immortal soul went down in the crash1 crash6 ,and1 fellow-citizens as well as fellow-,christians1 let us have a divine rage against anything that wars on the marriage state4 ,blessed institution6 ,instead of two arms to fight the battle of life1 four4 ,instead of two eyes to scrutinize the path of life1 four4 ,instead of two shoulders to lift the burden of life1 four4 ,twice the energy1 twice the courage1 twice the holy ambition1 twice the probability of worldly success1 twice the prospects of heaven4 ,into that matrimonial bower ,god fetches two souls4 ,outside the bower room for all contentions1 and all bickerings1 and all controversies1 but inside that bower there is room for only one guest--the angel of love4 ,let that angel stand at the floral doorway of this ,edenic bower with drawn sword to hew down the worst foe of that bower--easy divorce4 ,and for every ,paradise lost may there be a ,paradise regained4 ,and after we quit our home here may we have a brighter home in heaven at the windows of which this moment are familiar faces watching for our arrival and wondering why so long we tarry4 ,,footnotes3 #c ,dr4 ,talmage1 in common with many critics1 here censures ,mr4 ,james ,anthony ,froude for making the disclosures4 ,it is1 however1 due to that eminent historian to say that he gives a different explanation of his motives than that suggested by ,dr4 ,talmage of a regard for shekels4 ,he states that as ,mr4 ,carlyle had selected him as his biographer and given the materials for the work into his hands1 he conceived that his duty as a conscientious man was to tell the whole truth4 ,he did it also as a matter of policy as well as of principle4 ,had he kept back any part1 it would have been told with less accuracy by others who knew some of the facts but not all of them4--,,ed4 ,,maternity4 ,moreover his mother made him a little coat1 and brought it to him from year to year1 when she came up with her husband to offer the yearly sacrifice4--,i ,,samuel #b3ai4 ,the stories of ,deborah and ,abigail are very apt to discourage a woman's soul4 ,she says within herself3 ,it is impossible that ,i ever can achieve any such grandeur of character1 and ,i don't mean to try2 as though a child should refuse to play the eight notes because he cannot execute a ,william ,tell4 ,this ,hannah of the text differs from the persons ,i just now named4 ,she was an ordinary woman1 with ordinary intellectual capacity1 placed in the ordinary circumstances1 and yet1 by extraordinary piety1 standing out before all the ages to come4 ,,the ,,model ,,christian ,,mother4 ,hannah was the wife of ,elkanah1 who was a person very much like herself--unromantic and plain1 never having fought a battle or been the subject of a marvelous escape4 ,neither of them would have been called a genius4 ,just what you and ,i might be1 that was ,elkanah and ,hannah4 ,the brightest time in all the history of that family was the birth of ,samuel4 ,although no star ran along the heavens pointing down to his birthplace1 ,i think the angels of ,god stooped at the coming of so wonderful a prophet4 ,as ,samuel had been given in answer to prayer1 ,elkanah and all his family1 save ,hannah1 started up to ,shiloh to offer sacrifices of thanksgiving4 ,the cradle where the child slept was altar enough for ,hannah's grateful heart1 but when the boy was old enough she took him to ,shiloh and took three bullocks1 and an ephah of flour1 and a bottle of wine1 and made offering of sacrifice unto the ,lord1 and there1 according to a previous vow1 she left him2 for there he was to stay all the days of his life1 and minister in the tabernacle4 ,years rolled on1 and every year ,hannah made with her own hands a garment for ,samuel1 and took it over to him4 ,the lad would have got along well without that garment1 for ,i suppose he was well clad by the ministry of the temple2 but ,hannah could not be contented unless she was all the time doing something for her darling boy4 ,moreover his mother made him a little coat1 and brought it to him from year to year1 when she came up with her husband to offer the yearly sacrifice4 ,i4 ,hannah stands before you1 then1 in the first place1 as ,,an ,,industrious ,,mother4 ,there was no need for her to work4 ,elkanah1 her husband1 was far from poor4 ,he belonged to a distinguished family2 for the ,bible tells us that he was the son of ,jeroham1 the son of ,elihu1 the son of ,tohu1 the son of ,zuph4 ,who were they8 you say4 ,i do not know2 but they were distinguished people1 no doubt1 or their names would not have been mentioned4 ,hannah might have seated herself with her family1 and1 with folded arms and dishevelled hair1 read novels from year to year1 if there had been any to read2 but when ,i see her making that garment1 and taking it over to ,samuel1 ,i know she is industrious from principle as well as from pleasure4 ,god would not have a mother become a drudge or a slave2 ,he would have her employ all the helps possible in this day in the rearing of her children4 ,but ,hannah ought never to be ashamed to be found making a coat for ,samuel4 ,most mothers need no counsel in this direction4 ,the wrinkles on their brow1 the pallor on their cheek1 the thimble-mark on their finger1 attest that they are faithful in their maternal duties4 ,the bloom1 and the brightness1 and the vivacity of girlhood have given place for the grander dignity1 and usefulness1 and industry of motherhood4 ,but there is ,a ,,heathenish ,,idea getting abroad in some of the families of ,americans2 there are mothers who banish themselves from the home circle4 ,for three fourths of their maternal duties they prove themselves incompetent4 ,they are ignorant of what their children wear1 and what their children eat1 and what their children read4 ,they intrust to irresponsible persons these young immortals1 and allow them to be under influences which may cripple their bodies1 or taint their purity1 or spoil their manners1 or destroy their souls4 ,from the awkward cut of ,samuel's coat you know his mother ,hannah did not make it4 ,out from under flaming chandeliers1 and off from imported carpets1 and down the granite stairs1 there has come a great crowd of children in this day1 untrained1 saucy1 incompetent for all practical duties of life1 ready to be caught in the first whirl of crime and sensuality4 ,indolent and unfaithful mothers will make indolent and unfaithful children4 ,you cannot expect neatness and order in any house where the daughters see nothing but slatternness and upsidedownativeness in their parents4 ,let ,hannah be idle1 and most certainly ,samuel will grow up idle4 ,who are the industrious men in all our occupations and professions8 ,who are they managing the merchandise of the world1 building the walls1 tinning the roofs1 weaving the carpets1 making the laws1 governing the nations1 making the earth to quake1 and heave1 and roar1 and rattle with the tread of gigantic enterprises8 ,who are they8 ,for the most part they descended from industrious mothers1 who1 in the old homestead1 used to spin their own yarn1 and weave their own carpets1 and plait their own door-mats1 and flag their own chairs1 and do their own work4 ,the stalwart men and the ,,influential ,,women of this day1 ninety-nine out of a hundred of them1 came from such an illustrious ancestry of hard knuckles and homespun4 ,and who are these people in society1 light as froth1 blown every whither of temptation and fashion--the peddlers of filthy stories1 the dancing-jacks of political parties1 the scum of society1 the tavern-lounging1 the store-infesting1 the men of low wink1 and filthy chuckle1 and brass breast-pins1 and rotten associations8 ,for the most part1 they came from mothers idle and disgusting--the scandal-mongers of society1 going from house to house1 attending to everybody's business but their own1 believing in witches1 and ghosts1 and horseshoes to keep the devil out of the churn1 and by a godless life setting their children on the very verge of hell4 ,the mothers of ,samuel ,johnson1 and of ,alfred the ,great1 and ,isaac ,newton1 and of ,st4 ,augustine1 and of ,richard ,cecil1 and of ,president ,edwards1 for the most part were industrious1 hard-working mothers4 ,now1 while ,i congratulate all ,christian mothers upon the wealth and the modern science which may afford them all kinds of help1 let me say that every mother ought to be observant of her children's walk1 her children's behavior1 her children's food1 her children's looks1 her children's companionships4 ,however much help ,hannah may have1 ,i think she ought every year1 at least1 make one garment for ,samuel4 ,the ,lord have mercy on the man who is so unfortunate as to have had a lazy mother6 ,,ii4 ,again1 ,hannah stands before you as ,,an ,,intelligent ,,mother4 ,from the way in which she talked in this chapter1 and from the way she managed this boy1 you know she was intelligent4 ,there are no persons in the community who need to be so wise and well-informed as mothers4 ,oh1 this work of culture in children for this world and the next6 ,this child is timid1 and it must be roused up and pushed out into activity4 ,this child is forward1 and he must be held back and tamed down into modesty and politeness4 ,rewards for one1 punishments for another4 ,that which will make ,george will ruin ,john4 ,the rod is necessary in one case1 while a frown of displeasure is more than enough in another4 ,whipping and a dark closet do not exhaust all the rounds of domestic discipline4 ,there have been children who have grown up and gone to glory without ever having had their ears boxed4 ,oh1 how much care and intelligence are necessary in the rearing of children6 ,but in this day1 when there are so many books on the subject1 no parent is excusable in being ignorant of the best mode of ,,bringing ,,up ,a ,,child4 ,if parents knew more of dietetics there would not be so many dyspeptic stomachs and weak nerves and inactive livers among children4 ,if parents knew more of physiology there would not be so many curved spines and cramped chests and inflamed throats and diseased lungs as there are among children4 ,if parents knew more of art1 and were in sympathy with all that is beautiful1 there would not be so many children coming out in the world with boorish proclivities4 ,if parents knew more of ,christ1 and practised more of ,his religion1 there would not be so many little feet already starting on the wrong road1 and all around us voices of riot and blasphemy would not come up with such ecstasy of infernal triumph4 ,the eaglets in the eyrie have no advantages over the eaglets of a thousand years ago2 the kids have no superior way of climbing up the rocks than the old goats taught hundreds of years ago2 the whelps know no more now than did the whelps of ages ago--they are taught no more by the lions of the desert2 but it is a shame that in this day1 when there are so many opportunities of improving ourselves in the best manner of cultivating children1 that so often there is no more advancement in this respect than there has been among the kids and the eaglets and the whelps4 ,,iii4 ,again1 ,hannah stands before you as ,a ,,christian ,,mother4 ,from her prayers and from the way she consecrated her boy to ,god1 ,i know that she was good4 ,a mother may have the finest culture1 the most brilliant surroundings2 but she is not fit for her duties unless she be a ,christian mother4 ,there may be well-read libraries in the house1 and exquisite music in the parlor1 and the canvases of the best artists adorning the walls1 and the wardrobe be crowded with tasteful apparel1 and the children be wonderful for their attainments1 and make the house ring with laughter and innocent mirth1 but there is something woeful-looking in that house if it be not also the residence of a ,christian mother4 ,i bless ,god that there are not many prayerless mothers--not many of them4 ,the weight of the responsibility is so great that they feel the need of a divine hand to help1 and a divine voice to comfort and a divine heart to sympathize4 ,thousands of mothers have been led into the kingdom of ,god by the hands of their little children4 ,there were hundreds of mothers who would not have been ,christians had it not been for the prattle of their little ones4 ,standing some day in the nursery1 they bethought themselves3 ,this child ,god has given me to raise for eternity4 ,what is my influence upon it8 ,not being a ,christian myself1 how can ,i ever expect him to become a ,christian8 ,lord1 help me6 ,are there ,,anxious ,,mothers who know nothing of the infinite help of religion8 ,then ,i commend to them ,hannah1 the pious mother of ,samuel4 ,do not think it is absolutely impossible that your children may come up iniquitous4 ,out of just such fair brows and bright eyes1 and soft hands1 and innocent hearts1 crime gets its victims--extirpating purity from the heart1 and rubbing out the smoothness from the brow1 and quenching the lustre of the eye1 and shriveling up and poisoning and putrefying and scathing and scalding and blasting and burning with shame and woe4 ,every child is a bundle of tremendous possibilities2 and whether that child shall come forth to life1 its heart attuned to the eternal harmonies1 and1 after a life of usefulness on earth1 go to a life of joy in heaven2 or whether across it shall jar eternal discords1 and1 after a life of wrong-doing on earth1 it shall go to a home of impenetrable darkness and an abyss of immeasurable plunge1 is being decided by nursery song and ,sabbath lesson and evening prayer and walk and ride and look and frown and smile4 ,oh1 how many children in glory1 crowding all the battlements1 and lifting a million-voiced hosanna1 brought to ,god through ,christian parentage6 ,one hundred and twenty clergymen were together1 and they were telling their experience and their ancestry2 and of the one hundred and twenty clergymen1 how many of them1 do you suppose1 assigned as the means of their conversion the influence of a ,christian mother8 ,one hundred out of the one hundred and twenty6 ,philip ,doddridge was brought to ,god by the ,scripture lesson on the ,dutch tiles of a chimney fireplace4 ,the mother thinks she is only rocking a child1 but at the same time she may be rocking the fate of nations1 rocking the glories of heaven4 ,the same maternal power that may lift the child up may press a child down4 ,a daughter came to ,a ,,worldly ,,mother and said she was anxious about her sins1 and she had been praying all night4 ,the mother said3 ,oh1 stop praying6 ,i don't believe in praying4 ,get over all these religious notions and ,i'll give you a dress that will cost #ejj1 and you may wear it next week to that party4 ,the daughter took the dress1 and she moved in the gay circle the gayest of all the gay1 that night2 and sure enough all the religious impressions were gone and she stopped praying4 ,a few months after she came to die1 and in her closing moments said3 ,mother1 ,i wish you would bring me that dress that cost #ejj4 ,the mother thought it a very strange request1 but she brought it to please the dying child4 ,now1 said the daughter1 mother1 hang that dress on the foot of my bed1 and the dress was hung there1 on the foot of the bed4 ,then the dying girl got up on one elbow and looked at her mother1 and then pointed to the dress1 and said3 ,mother1 that dress is the price of my soul4 ,oh1 what a momentous thing it is to be a mother6 ,,iv4 ,again1 and lastly1 ,hannah stands before you ,,the ,,rewarded ,,mother4 ,for all the coats she made for ,samuel1 for all the prayers she offered for him1 for the discipline exerted over him she got abundant compensation in the piety and the usefulness and the popularity of her son ,samuel2 and that is true in all ages4 ,every mother gets full pay for all the prayers and tears in behalf of her children4 ,that man useful in commercial life2 that man prominent in a profession2 that master mechanic--why1 every step he takes in life has an echo of gladness in the old heart that long ago taught him to be a ,christian1 and heroic and earnest4 ,the story of what you have done1 or what you have written1 of the influence you exerted1 has gone back to the old homestead--for there is some one always ready to carry good tidings--and that story makes the needle in the old mother's tremulous hand fly quicker1 and the flail in the father's hand come down on the barn floor with a vigorous thump4 ,parents love to hear good news from their children4 ,do you send them good news always8 ,look out for the young man who speaks of his father as the governor1 the squire1 or the old chap4 ,look out for the young woman who calls her mother her maternal ancestor1 or the old woman4 ,the eye that mocketh at his father1 and refuseth to obey his mother1 the ravens of the valley shall pick it out1 and the young eagles shall eat it4 ,god grant that all these parents may have the great satisfaction of seeing their children grow up ,christians4 ,but1 oh6 the pang of that mother1 who1 after a life of street gadding and gossip retailing1 hanging on the children the fripperies and follies of this world1 sees those children tossed out on the sea of life like foam on the wave1 or nonentities in a world where only bravery and stalwart character can stand the shock6 ,but blessed be the mother who looks upon her children as sons and daughters of the ,lord ,almighty4 ,oh6 the satisfaction of ,hannah in seeing ,samuel serving at the altar2 of ,mother ,eunice in seeing her ,timothy learned in the ,scriptures4 ,that is the mother's recompense1 to see children coming up useful in the world1 reclaiming the lost1 healing the sick1 pitying the ignorant1 earnest and useful in every sphere4 ,that throws a new light back on the old family ,bible whenever she reads it1 and that will be ointment to soothe the aching limbs of decrepitude1 and light up the closing hours of life's day with the glories of an autumnal sunset6 ,there she sits1 ,,the ,,old ,,christian ,,mother1 ripe for heaven4 ,her eyesight is almost gone1 but the splendors of the celestial city kindle up her vision4 ,the gray light of heaven's morn has struck through the gray locks which are folded back over the wrinkled temples4 ,she stoops very much now under the burden of care she used to carry for her children4 ,she sits at home1 too old to find her way to the house of ,god2 but while she sits there1 all the past comes back1 and the children that forty years ago tripped around her armchair with their griefs and joys and sorrows--those children are gone now4 ,some caught up into a better realm1 where they shall never die1 and others out in the broad world1 testing the excellency of a ,christian mother's discipline4 ,her last days are full of peace2 and calmer and sweeter will her spirit become1 until the gates of life shall lift and let in the worn-out pilgrim into eternal springtide and youth1 where the limbs never ache1 and the eyes never grow dim1 and the staff of the exhausted and decrepit pilgrim shall become the palm of the immortal athlete6 ,,the ,,children',s ,,patrimony4 ,whose son art thou1 thou young man8--,,samuel #ag3eh4 ,never was there a more unequal fight than that between ,david and ,goliath4 ,david five feet high2 ,goliath ten4 ,david a shepherd boy1 brought up amid rural scenes2 ,goliath a warrior by profession4 ,goliath a mountain of braggadocia2 ,david a marvel of humility4 ,goliath armed with an iron spear2 ,david armed with a sling with smooth stones from the brook4 ,but you are not to despise these latter weapons4 ,there was a regiment of slingers in the ,assyrian army and a regiment of slingers in the ,egyptian army1 and they made terrible execution1 and they could cast a stone with as much precision and force as now can be hurled shot or shell4 ,the ,greeks in their army had slingers who would throw leaden plummets inscribed with the irritating words3 ,take this6 ,so it was a mighty weapon ,david employed in that famous combat4 ,a ,jewish rabbi says that the probability is that ,goliath was in such contempt for ,david1 that in a paroxysm of laughter he threw his head back1 and his helmet fell off1 and ,david saw the uncovered forehead1 and his opportunity had come1 and taking his sling and swinging it around his head two or three times1 and aiming at that uncovered forehead1 he crushed it in like an egg-shell4 ,the battle over1 ,,behold ,a ,,tableau3 ,king ,saul sitting1 little ,david standing1 his fingers clutched into the hair of decapitated ,goliath4 ,as ,saul sees ,david standing there holding in his hand the ghastly1 reeking1 staring trophy1 evidence of the complete victory over ,god's enemies1 the king wonders what parentage was honored by such heroism1 and in my text he asks ,david his pedigree3 ,whose son art thou1 thou young man8 ,the king saw what you and ,i see1 that this question of heredity is a mighty question4 ,the longer ,i live the more ,i ,,believe ,,in ,,blood --good blood1 bad blood1 proud blood1 humble blood1 honest blood1 thieving blood1 heroic blood1 cowardly blood4 ,the tendency may skip a generation or two1 but it is sure to come out1 as in a little child you sometimes see a similarity to a great-grandfather whose picture hangs on the wall4 ,that the physical and mental and moral qualities are inheritable is patent to any one who keeps his eyes open4 ,the similarity is so striking sometimes as to be amusing4 ,great families1 regal or literary1 are apt to have the characteristics all down through the generations1 and what is more perceptible in such families may be seen on a smaller scale in all families4 ,a thousand years have no power to obliterate the difference4 ,,royal ,,rascals4 ,the large lip of the ,house of ,austria is seen in all the generations1 and is called the ,hapsburg lip4 ,the ,house of ,stuart always means in all generations cruelty and bigotry and sensuality4 ,witness ,queen of ,scotts4 ,witness ,charles ,i4 and ,charles ,,ii4 ,witness ,james ,i4 and ,james ,,ii4 and all the other scoundrels of that imperial line4 ,scottish blood means persistence1 ,english blood means reverence for the ancient1 ,welsh blood means religiosity1 ,danish blood means fondness for the sea1 ,indian blood means roaming disposition1 ,celtic blood means fervidity1 ,roman blood means conquest4 ,the ,jewish facility for accumulation you may trace clear back to ,abraham1 of whom the ,bible says he was rich in silver and gold and cattle1 and to ,isaac and ,jacob1 who had the same ,,family ,,characteristics4 ,some families are characterized by longevity1 and they have a tenacity of life positively ,methuselahish4 ,others are characterized by ,goliathian stature1 and you can see it for one generation1 two generations1 five generations1 in all the generations4 ,vigorous theology runs on in the line of the ,alexanders4 ,tragedy runs on in the family of the ,kembles4 ,literature runs on in the line of the ,trollopes4 ,philanthropy runs on in the line of the ,wilberforces4 ,statesmanship runs on in the line of the ,adamses4 ,henry and ,catharine of ,navarre religious1 all their families religious4 ,the celebrated family of the ,casini1 all mathematicians4 ,the celebrated family of the ,medici--grandfather1 son and ,catharine--all remarkable for keen intellect4 ,the celebrated family of ,gustavus ,adolphus1 all warriors4 ,this law of heredity asserts itself without reference to social or political condition1 for you sometimes find the ignoble in high place and the honorable in obscure place4 ,a descendant of ,edward ,i4 a toll gatherer4 ,a descendant of ,edward ,,iii4 a door-keeper4 ,a descendant of the ,duke of ,northumberland a trunk-maker4 ,some of the mightiest families of ,england are extinct1 while some of those most honored in the peerage go back to an ancestry of hard knuckles and rough exterior4 ,this law of heredity entirely independent of social or political condition4 ,then you find avarice and jealousy and sensuality and fraud having full swing in some families4 ,the violent temper of ,frederick ,william is the inheritance of ,frederick the ,great4 ,it is not a theory to be set forth by worldly philosophy only1 but by divine authority4 ,do you not remember how the ,bible speaks of a chosen generation1 of the generation of the righteous1 of the generation of vipers1 of an untoward generation1 of a stubborn generation1 of the iniquity of the past visited upon the children unto the third and fourth generation8 ,so that the text comes to-day with the force of a projectile hurled from mightiest catapult3 ,whose son art thou1 thou young man8 ,well1 says some one1 that theory discharges me from all responsibility4 ,born of sanctified parents we are bound to be good and we cannot help ourselves4 ,born of unrighteous parentage we are bound to be evil and we cannot help ourselves4 ,,two ,,inaccuracies4 ,as much as if you should say1 ,the centripetal force in nature has a tendency to bring everything to the centre1 and therefore all things come to the centre4 ,the centrifugal force in nature has a tendency to throw out everything to the periphery1 and therefore everything will go out to the periphery4 ,you know as well as ,i know that you can make the centripetal overcome the centrifugal1 and you can make the centrifugal overcome the centripetal4 ,as when there is a mighty tide of good in a family that may be overcome by determination to evil1 as in the case of ,aaron ,burr1 the libertine1 who had for father ,president ,burr1 the consecrated2 as in the case of ,pierrepont ,edwards1 the scourge of ,new ,york society seventy years ago1 who had a ,christian ancestry2 while on the other hand some of the best men and women of this day are those who have come of an ancestry of which it would not be courteous to speak in their presence4 ,,your ,,duty4 ,the practical and useful object of this sermon is to show to you that if you have come of a ,christian ancestry1 then you are solemnly bound to preserve and develop the glorious inheritance2 or if you have come of a depraved ancestry1 then it is your duty to brace yourself against the evil tendency by all prayer and ,christian determination1 and you are to find out what are the family frailties1 and in arming the castle put the strongest guard at the weakest gate4 ,with these smooth stones from the brook ,i hope to strike you1 not where ,david struck ,goliath1 in the head1 but where ,nathan struck ,david1 in the heart4 ,whose son art thou1 thou young man8 ,there is something in the periodical holidays to bring up ,,the ,,old ,,folks4 ,sometime in the winter holiday1 when we are accustomed to gather our families together1 old times have come back again1 and our thoughts have been set to the tune of ,auld ,lang ,syne4 ,the old folks were so busy at such times in making us happy1 and perhaps on less resource made their sons and daughters happier than you on larger resource are able to make your sons and daughters happy4 ,the snow lay two feet above their graves1 but they shook off the white blankets and mingled in the holiday festivities--the same wrinkles1 the same stoop of shoulder under the weight of age1 the same old style of dress or coat1 the same smile1 the same tones of voice4 ,i hope you remember them before they went away4 ,if not1 ,i hope there are those who have recited to you what they were1 and that there may be in your house some article of dress or furniture with which you associate their memories4 ,i want to arouse the most sacred memories of your heart while ,i make the impassioned interrogatory in regard to your pedigree3 ,whose son art thou1 thou young man8 ,i4 ,first1 ,i accost all those who are descended of a ,,christian ,,ancestry4 ,i do not ask if your parents were perfect4 ,there are no perfect people now1 and ,i do not suppose there were any perfect people then4 ,perhaps there was sometimes too much blood in their eye when they chastised you4 ,but from what ,i know of you1 you got no more than you deserved1 and perhaps a little more chastisement would have been salutary4 ,but you are willing to acknowledge1 ,i think1 that they wanted to do right4 ,from what you overheard in conversations1 and from what you saw at the family altar and at neighborhood obsequies1 you know that they had invited ,god into their heart and life4 ,there was something that sustained those old people supernaturally4 ,you have no doubt about their destiny4 ,you expect if you ever get to heaven to meet them as certainly as you expect to meet the ,lord ,jesus ,christ4 ,that early association has been a charm for you4 ,there was a time when you got right up from a house of iniquity and walked out into the fresh air because you thought your mother was looking at you4 ,you have never been very happy in sin because of a sweet old face that would present itself4 ,tremulous voices from the past accosted you until they were seemingly audible1 and you looked around to see who spoke4 ,there was an estate not mentioned in the last will and testament1 a vast estate of prayer and holy example and ,christian entreaty and glorious memory4 ,the survivors of the family gathered to hear the will read1 and this was to be kept1 and that was to be sold1 and it was share and share alike4 ,but there was ,,an ,,unwritten ,,will that read something like this3 ,in the name of ,god1 ,amen4 ,i1 being of sound mind1 bequeath to my children all my prayers for their salvation2 ,i bequeath to them all the results of a lifetime's toil2 ,i bequeath to them the ,christian religion which has been so much comfort to me1 and ,i hope may be solace for them2 ,i bequeath to them a hope of reunion when the partings of life are over2 share and share alike may they have in eternal riches4 ,i bequeath to them the wish that they may avoid my errors and copy anything that may have been worthy4 ,in the name of the ,god who made me1 and the ,christ who redeemed me1 and the ,holy ,ghost who sanctifies me1 ,i make this my last will and testament4 ,witness1 all ye hosts of heaven4 ,witness1 time1 witness1 eternity4 ,signed1 sealed1 and delivered in this our dying hour4 ,father and ,mother4 ,you did not get that will proved at the surrogate's office2 but ,i take it out to-day and ,i read it to you2 ,i take it out of the alcoves of your heart2 ,i shake the dust off it1 ,i ask you will you accept that inheritance1 or will you break the will8 ,o ye of ,christian ancestry1 you have a responsibility vast beyond all measurement6 ,god will not let you off with just being as good as ordinary people when you had such extraordinary advantage4 ,ought not a flower planted in a hot-house be more thrifty than a flower planted outside in the storm8 ,ought not a factory turned by the ,housatonic do more work than a factory turned by a thin and shallow mountain stream8 ,ought not you of great early opportunity be better than those who had a cradle unblessed8 ,,the ,,capital ,,account4 ,a father sets his son up in business4 ,he keeps an account of all the expenditures4 ,so much for store fixtures1 so much for rent1 so much for this1 so much for that1 and all the items aggregated1 and the father expects the son to give an account4 ,your heavenly ,father charges against you all the advantages of a pious ancestry--so many prayers1 so much ,christian example1 so many kind entreaties--all these gracious influences one tremendous aggregate1 and ,he asks you for an account of it4 ,ought not you to be better than those who had no such advantages8 ,better have been a foundling picked up off the city commons than with such magnificent inheritance of consecration to turn out indifferently4 ,ought not you1 my brother1 to be better1 having had ,christian nurture1 than that man who can truly say this morning3 ,the first word ,i remember my father speaking to me was an oath2 the first time ,i remember my father taking hold of me was in wrath2 ,i never saw a ,bible till ,i was ten years of age1 and then ,i was told it was a pack of lies4 ,the first twenty years of my life ,i was associated with the vicious4 ,i seemed to be walled in by sin and death4 ,now1 my brother1 ought you not--,i leave it as a matter of fairness with you--ought you not to be far better than those who had no early ,christian influence8 ,standing as you do between the generation that is past and the generation that is to come1 are you going to pass the blessing on1 or are you going to have your life the gulf in which that tide of blessing shall drop out of sight forever8 ,you are ,,the ,,trustee ,,of ,,piety in that ancestral line1 and are you going to augment or squander that solemn trust fund8 are you going to disinherit your sons and daughters of the heirloom which your parents left you8 ,ah6 that cannot be possible1 that cannot be possible that you are going to take such a position as that4 ,you are very careful about the life insurances1 and careful about the deeds1 and careful about the mortgages1 and careful about the title of your property1 because when you step off the stage you want your children to get it all4 ,are you making no provision that they shall get grandfather and grandmother's religion8 ,oh1 what a last will and testament you are making1 my brother6 ,in the name of ,god1 ,amen4 ,i1 being of sound mind1 make this my last will and testament4 ,i bequeath to my children all the money ,i ever made and all the houses ,i own2 but ,i disinherit them1 ,i rob them of the ancestral grace and the ,christian influence that ,i inherited4 ,i have squandered that on my own worldliness4 ,share and share alike must they in the misfortune and the everlasting outrage4 ,signed1 sealed and delivered in the presence of ,god and men and angels and devils and all the generations of earth and heaven and hell1 ,march1 #ahhf4 ,o ye of highly favored ancestry1 wake up this morning to a sense of your opportunity and your responsibility4 ,i think there must be ,,an ,,old ,,cradle1 or a fragment of a cradle somewhere that could tell a story of midnight supplication in your behalf4 ,where is the old rocking-chair in which you were sung to sleep with the holy nursery rhyme8 ,where is the old clock that ticked away the moments of that sickness on that awful night when there were but three of you awake--you and ,god and mother8 ,is there not an old staff in some closet8 is there not an old family ,bible on some shelf that seems to address you1 saying3 ,my son1 my daughter1 how can you reject that ,god who so kindly dealt with us all our lives and to whom we commended you in our prayers living and dying8 ,by the memory of the old homestead1 by the family altar1 by our dying pillow1 by the graves in which our bodies sleep while our spirits hover1 we beg you to turn over a new leaf for the new year4 ,oh1 the power of ancestral piety1 well illustrated by a young man of ,new ,york who attended a prayer-meeting one night and asked for prayer1 and then went home and wrote down these words3 ,,an ,,entry ,,in ,a ,,diary4 ,twenty-five years ago to-night my mother went to heaven1 my beautiful1 blessed mother1 and ,i have been alone1 tossed up and down upon the billows of life's tempestuous ocean4 ,shall ,i ever go to heaven8 ,she told me ,i must meet her in heaven4 ,when she took her boy's hand in hers and turned her gentle1 loving eyes on me1 and gazed earnestly and long into my face1 and then lifted them to heaven in that last prayer1 she prayed that ,i might meet her in heaven4 ,i wonder if ,i ever shall4 ,my mother's prayers6 ,oh1 my sweet1 blessed mother's prayers6 ,did ever boy have such a mother as ,i had8 ,for twenty-five years ,i have not heard her pray until to-night4 ,i have heard all her prayers over again4 ,they have had1 in fact1 a terrible resurrection4 ,oh1 how she was wont to pray6 ,she prayed as they prayed to-night1 so earnest1 so importunate1 so believing4 ,shall ,i ever be a ,christian8 ,she was a ,christian4 ,oh1 how bright and pure and happy was her life6 ,she was a cheerful and happy ,christian4 ,there is ,,my ,,mother',s ,,bible4 ,i have not opened it for years4 ,did she believe ,i could ever neglect her precious ,bible8 ,she surely thought ,i would read it much and often4 ,how often has she read it to me4 ,blessed mother1 did you pray in vain for your boy8 ,it shall not be in vain4 ,ah6 no1 no1 it shall not be in vain4 ,i will pray for myself4 ,who has sinned against so much instruction as ,i have8 against so many precious prayers put up to heaven for me by one of the most lovely1 tender1 pious1 confiding1 trusting of mothers in her heavenly ,father's care and grace8 ,she never doubted4 ,she believed4 ,she always prayed as if she did4 ,my ,bible1 my mother's ,bible and my conscience teach what ,i am and what ,i have made myself4 ,oh1 the bitter pangs of an accusing conscience6 ,i need a ,saviour mighty to save4 ,i must seek ,him4 ,i will4 ,i am on the sea of existence1 and ,i can never get off from it4 ,i am afloat4 ,no anchor1 no rudder1 no compass1 no book of instructions1 for ,i have put them all away from me4 ,saviour of the perishing1 save or ,i perish4 ,do you wonder that the next day he arose in a prayer-meeting and said3 ,my brethren1 ,i stand before you a monument of ,god's amazing mercy and goodness1 forever blessed be ,his holy name2 all ,i have and all ,i am ,i consecrate to ,jesus1 my ,saviour and my ,god8 ,oh1 the power of ancestral prayer4 ,hear it6 ,hear it6 ,,ii4 ,but ,i turn for a moment to those who had ,,evil ,,parentage1 and ,i want to tell you that the highest thrones in heaven and the mightiest triumphs and the brightest crowns will be for those who had evil parentage1 but who by the grace of ,god conquered4 ,as useful1 as splendid a gentleman as ,i know of to-day had for father a man who died blaspheming ,god until the neighbors had to put their fingers in their ears to shut out the horror4 ,one of the most consecrated and useful ,christian ministers of to-day was born of a drunken horse-jockey4 ,tide of evil tremendous in some families4 ,it is like ,niagara ,rapids1 and yet men have clung to a rock and been rescued4 ,there is a family in ,new ,york whose wealth has rolled up into many millions that was founded by a man who1 after he had vast estate sent back a paper of tacks because they were two cents more than he expected4 ,grip and grind and gouge in the fourth generation--,i suppose it will be grip and grind and gouge in the twentieth generation4 ,the thirst for intoxicants has burned down through the arteries of a hundred and fifty years4 ,pugnacity or combativeness characterize other families4 ,sometimes one form of evil1 sometimes another form of evil4 ,but ,,it ,,may ,,be ,,resisted1 it has been resisted4 ,if the family frailty be avarice1 cultivate unselfishness and charity1 and teach your children never to eat an apple without offering somebody else half of it4 ,is the family frailty combativeness1 keep out of the company of quick-tempered people1 and never answer an impertinent question until you have counted a hundred both ways1 and after you have written an angry letter keep it a week before you send it1 and then burn it up6 ,is the family frailty timidity and cowardice1 cultivate backbone1 read the biography of brave men like ,joshua or ,paul1 and see if you cannot get a little iron in your blood4 ,find out what the family frailty is1 and set body1 mind and soul in battle array4 ,,conquer ,,your ,,will4 ,i think the genealogical table was put in the first chapter of the ,new ,testament1 not only to show our ,lord's pedigree1 but to show that a man may rise up in an ancestral line and beat back successfully all the influences of bad heredity4 ,see in that genealogical table that good ,king ,asa came of vile ,king ,abia4 ,see in that genealogical table that ,joseph and ,mary and the most illustrious ,being that ever touched our world1 or ever will touch it1 had in their ancestral line scandalous ,rehoboam and ,tamar and ,bathsheba4 ,if this world is ever to be ,edenized--and it will be--all the infected families of the earth are to be regenerated1 and there will some one arise in each family line and open a new genealogical table4 ,there will be some ,joseph in the line to reverse the evil influence of ,rehoboam1 and there will be some ,mary in the line to reverse the evil influence of ,bathsheba4 ,perhaps the star of hope may point down to your manger4 ,perhaps you are to be the hero or the heroine that is to put down the brakes and stop that long train of genealogical tendencies and switch it off on another track from that on which it has been running for a century4 ,you do that1 and ,i will promise you as fine a palace as the architects of heaven can build1 the archway inscribed with the words3 ,more than conqueror4 ,,adopted ,,children4 ,but whatever your heredity1 let me say1 you may be sons and daughters of the ,lord ,god ,almighty4 ,estranged children from the homestead come back through the open gate of adoption4 ,there is royal blood in our veins4 ,there are crowns in our escutcheon4 ,our ,father is ,king4 ,our ,brother is ,king4 ,we may be kings and queens unto ,god forever4 ,come and sit down on the ivory bench of the palace4 ,come and wash in the fountains that fall into the basins of crystal and alabaster4 ,come and look out of the upholstered window upon gardens of azalea and amaranth4 ,hear the full burst of the orchestra while you banquet with potentates and victors4 ,oh1 when the text sweeps backward1 let it not stop at the cradle that rocked your infancy1 but at the cradle that rocked the first world1 and when the text sweeps forward1 let it not stop at your grave1 but at the throne on which you may reign forever and ever6 ,whose son art thou1 thou young man8 ,son of ,god6 ,heir of mortality6 ,take your inheritance6 ,,the ,,mother ,,of ,,all4 ,and the ,lord ,god caused a deep sleep to fall upon ,adam1 and he slept2 and ,he took one of his ribs1 and closed up the flesh instead thereof2 and the rib1 which the ,lord ,god had taken from man1 made ,he a woman1 and brought her unto the man4--,,genesis #b3ba1 #bb4 ,it is the first ,saturday afternoon in the world's existence4 ,ever since sunrise ,adam has been watching the brilliant pageantry of wings and scales and clouds1 and in his first lessons in zoology and ornithology and ichthyology he has noticed that the robins fly the air in twos1 and that the fish swim the water in twos1 and that the lions walk the fields in twos1 and in the warm redolence of that ,saturday afternoon he falls off into slumber2 and as if by allegory to teach all ages that the greatest of earthly blessings is sound sleep1 this paradisaical somnolence ends with the discovery on the part of ,adam of ,a ,,corresponding ,,intelligence just landed on the new planet4 ,of the mother of all the living ,i speak--,eve1 the first1 the fairest and the best4 ,i make me a garden4 ,i inlay the paths with mountain moss1 and ,i border them with pearls from ,ceylon and diamonds from ,golconda4 ,here and there are fountains tossing in the sunlight1 and ponds that ripple under the paddling of the swans4 ,i gather me lilies from the ,amazon1 and orange groves from the tropics1 and tamarinds from ,goyaz4 ,there are woodbine and honey-suckle climbing over the wall1 and starred spaniels sprawling themselves on the grass4 ,i invite amid these trees the larks1 and the brown thrushes1 and the robins1 and all the brightest birds of heaven1 and they stir the air with infinite chirp and carol4 ,and yet the place is a desert filled with darkness and death as compared with ,,the ,,residence ,,of ,,the ,,woman of the text1 the subject of my morning story4 ,never since have such skies looked down through such leaves into such waters6 ,never has river wave had such curve and sheen and bank as adorned the ,pison1 the ,havilah1 the ,gihon1 and the ,hiddakel1 even the pebbles being bdellium and onyx stone6 ,what fruits1 with no curculio to sting the rind6 ,what flowers1 with no slug to gnaw the root6 ,what atmosphere1 with no frost to chill and with no heat to consume6 ,bright colors tangled in the grass4 ,perfume in the air4 ,music in the sky4 ,bird's warble and tree's hum1 and waterfall's dash4 ,great scene of gladness and love and joy4 ,right there under a bower of leaf and vine and shrub occurred ,,the ,,first ,,marriage4 ,adam took the hand of this immaculate daughter of ,god and pronounced the ceremony when he said3 ,bone of my bone1 and flesh of my flesh4 ,a ,,forbidden ,,tree stood in the midst of that exquisite park4 ,eve sauntering out one day alone looks up at the tree and sees the beautiful fruit1 and wonders if it is sweet1 and wonders if it is sour1 and standing there1 says3 ,i think ,i will just put my hand upon the fruit2 it will do no damage to the tree2 ,i will not take the fruit to eat1 but ,i will just take it down to examine it4 ,she examined the fruit4 ,she said3 ,i do not think there can be any harm in my just breaking the rind of it4 ,she put the fruit to her teeth1 she tasted1 she invited ,adam also to taste of the fruit1 the door of the world opened1 and the monster ,sin entered4 ,let the heavens gather blackness1 and the winds sigh on the bosom of the hills1 and cavern and desert and earth and sky join in one long1 deep1 hell-rending howl3 ,,the ,,world ,,is ,,lost6 ,beasts that before were harmless and full of play put forth claw1 and sting1 and tooth1 and tusk4 ,birds whet their beak for prey4 ,clouds troop in the sky4 ,sharp thorns shoot up through the soft grass4 ,blastings on the leaves4 ,all the chords of that great harmony are snapped4 ,upon the brightest home this world ever saw our first parents turned their back and led forth on a path of sorrow the broken-hearted myriads of a ruined race4 ,do you not see1 in the first place1 the danger of a poorly regulated ,,inquisitiveness8 ,she wanted to know how the fruit tasted4 ,she found out1 but six thousand years have deplored that unhealthful curiosity4 ,healthy curiosity has done a great deal for letters1 for art1 for science and for religion4 ,it has gone down into the depths of the earth with the geologist and seen the first chapter of ,genesis written in the book of nature illustrated with engraving on rock1 and it stood with the antiquarian while he blew the trumpet of resurrection over buried ,herculaneum and ,pompeii1 until from their sepulchre there came up shaft and terrace and amphitheatre4 ,healthful curiosity has enlarged the telescopic vision of the astronomer until worlds hidden in the distant heavens have trooped forth and have joined the choir praising the ,lord4 ,planet weighed against planet and wildest comet lassoed with resplendent law4 ,,healthful ,,curiosity has gone down and found the tracks of the eternal ,god in the polypi and the starfish under the sea and the majesty of the great ,jehovah encamped under the gorgeous curtains of the dahlia4 ,it has studied the spots on the sun1 and the larvae in a beech leaf1 and the light under fire-fly's wing1 and the terrible eye glance of a condor pitching from ,chimborazo4 ,it has studied the myriads of animalculae that make up the phosphorescence in a ship's wake1 and the mighty maze of suns1 and spheres1 and constellations1 and galaxies that blaze on in the march of ,god4 ,healthful curiosity has stood by the inventor until forces that were hidden for ages came to wheels1 and levers1 and shafts1 and shuttles--forces that fly the air1 or swim the sea1 or cleave the mountain until the earth jars1 and roars1 and rings1 and crackles1 and booms1 with strange mechanism1 and ships with nostrils of hot steam and yokes of fire draw the continents together4 ,i say nothing against healthful curiosity4 ,may it have other ,leyden jars1 and other electric batteries1 and other voltaic piles1 and other magnifying glasses with which to storm the barred castles of the natural world until it shall surrender its last secret4 ,we thank ,god for the geological curiosity of ,professor ,hitchcock1 and the mechanical curiosity of ,liebig1 and the zooelogical curiosity of ,cuvier1 and the inventive curiosity of ,edison2 but we must admit that unhealthful and irregular inquisitiveness has rushed thousands and tens of thousands into ruin4 ,eve just tasted the fruit4 ,she was curious to find out how it tasted1 and that ,,curiosity ,,blasted ,,her and blasted all nations4 ,so there are clergy in this day inspired by unhealthful inquisitiveness who have tried to look through the keyhole of ,god's mysteries1 mysteries that were barred and bolted from all human inspection1 and they have wrenched their whole moral nature out of joint by trying to pluck fruit from branches beyond their reach1 or have come out on limbs of the tree from which they have tumbled into ruin without remedy4 ,a thousand trees of religious knowledge from which we may eat and get advantage2 but from certain ,,trees ,,of ,,mystery how many have plucked their ruin6 ,election1 free agency1 trinity1 resurrection--in the discussion of these subjects hundreds and thousands of people ruin the soul4 ,there are men who have actually been kept out of the kingdom of heaven because they could not understand who ,melchisedec was not6 ,oh1 how many have been destroyed by an unhealthful inquisitiveness6 ,it is seen in all directions4 ,there are those who stand with the eye-stare and mouth-gape of curiosity4 ,they are the first to hear a falsehood1 build it another story high and two wings to it4 ,about other people's apparel1 about other people's business1 about other people's financial condition1 about other people's affairs1 they are over anxious4 ,every nice piece of gossip stops at their door1 and they fatten and luxuriate in the endless round of the great world of tittle-tattle4 ,they invite and sumptuously entertain at their house ,colonel ,twaddle and ,esquire ,chitchat and ,governor ,smalltalk4 ,whoever hath an innuendo1 whoever hath a scandal1 whoever hath a valuable secret1 let him come and sacrifice it to ,,this ,,goddess ,,of ,,splutter4 ,thousands of ,adams and ,eves do nothing but eat fruit that does not belong to them4 ,men quite well known as mathematicians failing in this computation of moral algebra3 good sense plus good breeding1 minus curiosity1 equals minding your own affairs6 ,then1 how many young men through curiosity go through the whole realm of ,,french ,,novels1 to see whether they are really as bad as moralists have pronounced them6 ,they come near the verge of the precipice just to look off4 ,they want to see how far it really is down1 but they lose their balance while they look1 and fall into remediless ruin2 or1 catching themselves1 clamber up1 bleeding and ghastly1 on the rock1 gibbering with curses or groaning ineffectual prayer4 ,by all means encourage healthful inquisitiveness1 by all means discourage ill regulated curiosity4 ,,treacherous ,,fruit4 ,the subject of the morning also impresses me with the fact that fruits that are sweet to the taste may afterward produce great agony4 ,forbidden fruit for ,eve was so pleasant she invited her husband also to take of it2 but her banishment from ,paradise1 and six thousand years of sorrow1 and wretchedness1 and war1 and woe paid for that luxury4 ,sin may be very sweet at the start1 and it may induce great wretchedness afterward4 ,the cup of sin is sparkling at the top1 but there is death at the bottom4 ,intoxication has great exhilaration for a while1 and it fillips the blood1 and it makes a man see five stars where others can see only one star1 and it makes the poor man rich1 and turns cheeks which are white red as roses2 but what about the dreams that come after1 when he seems falling from great heights1 or is prostrated by other fancied disasters1 and the perspiration stands on the forehead1 the night dew of everlasting darkness1 and he is ground under the horrible hoof of nightmares shrieking with lips that crackle with all-consuming torture8 ,rejoice1 ,o young man1 in thy youth1 and let thy heart cheer thee in the days of thy youth2 but know thou1 that for all these things ,god will bring thee into judgment6 ,,sweet ,,at ,,the ,,start1 horrible at the last4 ,go into that hall of revelry1 where ungodly mirth staggers and blasphemes4 ,listen to the senseless gabble1 see the last trace of intelligence dashed out from faces made in ,god's own image4 ,aha6 aha6 says the roystering inebriate2 this is joy for you2 fill high your cups1 my boys4 ,i drink to my wife's misery and my children's rags and my ,god's defiance4 ,and he knows not that a fiend stirs the goblet in his hand and that adders uncoil from the dregs and thrust their forked tongues hissing through the froth on the rim4 ,,perdition ,,bought ,,for ,a ,,sixpence4 ,the ,philistines jeered and laughed and shouted at ,samson4 ,oh1 they wanted him to make sport for them1 and he made sport for them6 ,how bright and gay was the scene for a little while6 ,after awhile the giant puts one hand against this pillar1 and the other hand against this pillar1 and bows himself1 and three thousand merry-makers are mashed like grapes in a wine-press4 ,sin rapturous at the start1 awful at the last4 ,that one ,edenic transgression did not seem to be much1 but it struck a blow which to this day makes the earth stagger like an ox under a butcher's bludgeon4 ,to find out the consequences of that one sin1 you would have to compel the world to throw open all its prison doors and display the crime1 and throw open all its hospitals and display the disease1 and throw open all the insane asylums and show the wretchedness1 and open all the sepulchres and show the dead1 and open all the doors of the lost world and show the damned4 ,that one ,edenic transgression stretched chords of misery across the heart of the world and struck them with dolorous wailing1 and it has seated the plagues upon the air and the shipwrecks upon the tempest1 and fastened like a leech famine to the heart of the sick and dying nations4 ,beautiful at the start1 horrible at the last4 ,oh1 how many have experienced it6 ,and there are those who are ,,votaries ,,of ,,pleasure4 ,let me warn you1 my brother4 ,your pleasure boat is far from shore1 and your summer day is ending roughly1 for the winds and the waves are loud voiced1 and the overcoming clouds are all awrithe and agleam with terror4 ,you are past the ,narrows1 and almost outside the ,hook1 and if the ,atlantic take thee1 frail mortal1 thou shalt never get to shore again4 ,put back1 row swiftly1 swifter1 swifter6 ,jesus from the shore casteth a rope4 ,clasp it quickly1 now or never4 ,oh1 are there not some of you who are freighting all your loves and joys and hopes upon a vessel which shall never reach the port of heaven8 ,thou nearest the breakers1 one heave upon the rock4 ,oh1 what an awful crash was that6 ,another lunge may crush thee beneath the spars or grind thy bones to powder amid the torn timbers4 ,overboard for your life1 overboard6 ,trust not that loose plank nor attempt the move1 but quickly clasp the feet of ,jesus walking on the watery pavement1 shouting until ,he hear thee1 ,lord1 save me1 or ,i perish4 ,sin beautiful at the start--oh1 how sad1 how distressful at the last6 ,the ground over which it leads you is hollow4 ,the fruit it offers to your taste is poison4 ,the promise it makes to you is a lie4 ,over that ungodly banquet the keen sword of ,god's judgment hangs1 and there are ominous handwritings on the wall4 ,,hideous ,,attractiveness4 ,observe also in this subject how repelling sin is when appended to great attractiveness4 ,since ,eve's death there has been no such perfection of womanhood4 ,you could not suggest an attractiveness to the body or suggest any refinement to the manner4 ,you could add no gracefulness to the gait1 no lustre to the eye1 no sweetness to the voice4 ,a perfect ,god made her a perfect woman to be the companion of a perfect man in a perfect home1 and her entire nature vibrated in accord with the beauty and song of ,paradise4 ,but she rebelled against ,god's government1 and with the same hand with which she plucked the fruit she launched upon the world the crimes1 the wars1 the tumults1 that have set the universe a-wailing1 ,a ,,terrible ,,offset to all her attractiveness4 ,we are not surprised when we find men and women naturally vulgar going into transgression4 ,we expect that people who live in the ditch shall have the manners of the ditch2 but how shocking when we find sin appended to superior education and to the refinements of social life4 ,the accomplishments of ,mary ,queen of ,scots make her patronage of ,darnley1 the profligate1 the more appalling4 ,the genius of ,catharine ,,ii41 of ,russia1 only sets forth in more powerful contrast her unappeasable ambition4 ,the translations from the ,greek and the ,latin by ,elizabeth1 and her wonderful qualifications for a queen1 made the more disgusting her capriciousness of affection and her hotness of temper4 ,the greatness of ,byron's mind made the more alarming ,byron's sensuality4 ,let no one who hears me this day think that refinement of manner or exquisiteness of taste or superiority of education can in any wise apologize for ill-temper1 for an oppressive spirit1 for unkindness1 for any kind of sin4 ,disobedience ,godward and transgression manward can give no excuse4 ,accomplishment heaven high is no apology for vice hell deep4 ,my subject also impresses me with the regal ,,influence ,,of ,,woman4 ,when ,i see ,eve with this powerful influence over ,adam and over the generations that have followed1 it suggests to me the great power all women have for good or for evil4 ,i have no sympathy1 nor have you1 with the hollow flatteries showered upon woman from the platform and the stage4 ,they mean nothing1 they are accepted as nothing4 ,woman's nobility consists in the exercise of a ,christian influence1 and when ,i see this powerful influence of ,eve upon her husband and upon the whole human race1 ,i make up my mind that the frail arm of woman can strike a blow which will resound through all eternity down among the dungeons1 or up among the thrones4 ,of course1 ,i am not speaking of representative women--of ,eve1 who ruined the race by one fruit-picking2 of ,jael1 who drove a spike through the head of ,sisera the warrior2 of ,esther1 who overcame royalty2 of ,abigail1 who stopped a host by her own beautiful prowess2 of ,mary1 who nursed the world's ,saviour2 of ,grandmother ,lois1 immortalized in her grandson ,timothy2 of ,charlotte ,corday1 who drove the dagger through the heart of the assassin of her lover1 or of ,marie ,antoinette1 who by one look from the balcony of her castle quieted a mob1 her own scaffold the throne of forgiveness and womanly courage4 ,i speak not of these extraordinary persons1 but of those who1 unambitious for political power1 as ,,wives ,,and ,,mothers and sisters and daughters1 attend to the thousand sweet offices of home4 ,when at last we come to calculate the forces that decided the destiny of nations1 it will be found that the mightiest and grandest influence came from home1 where the wife cheered up despondency and fatigue and sorrow by her own sympathy1 and the mother trained her child for heaven1 starting the little feet on the path to the celestial city2 and the sisters by their gentleness refined the manners of the brother2 and the daughters were diligent in their kindness to the aged1 throwing wreaths of blessing on the road that leads father and mother down the steep of years4 ,need ,i go into history to find you illustrations8 ,ah no2 in your own memory there was at least one such6 ,when ,i come to speak of womanly influence1 my mind always wanders off to ,,one ,,model1 the aged one who1 twenty years ago1 we put away for the resurrection4 ,about eighty years ago1 and just before their marriage day1 my father and mother stood up in the old meeting-house at ,somerville1 ,new ,jersey1 and took upon them the vows of the ,christian4 ,through a long life of vicissitude she lived harmlessly and usefully1 and came to her end in peace4 ,no child of want ever came to her door and was turned empty away4 ,no one in sorrow came to her but was comforted4 ,no one asked her the way to be saved but she pointed him to the cross4 ,when the angel of life came to a neighbor's dwelling she was there to rejoice at the incarnation4 ,when the angel of death came to a neighbor's dwelling she was there to robe the departed for the burial4 ,we had often heard her1 when leading family prayers in the absence of my father1 say1 ,o ,lord1 ,i ask not for my children wealth or honor1 but ,i do ask that they all may be the subjects of thy comforting grace8 ,her eleven children brought into the kingdom of ,god1 she had but one more wish1 and that was that she might see her long-absent missionary son2 and when the ship from ,china anchored in ,new ,york harbor1 and the long-absent one passed over the threshold of his paternal home1 she said3 ,now1 ,lord1 lettest ,thou thy servant depart in peace1 for mine eyes have seen thy salvation4 ,the prayer was soon answered4 ,it was an autumnal day very much like this when we gathered from afar and found only the house from which the soul had fled forever4 ,she looked very natural1 the hands very much as when they were employed in kindness for her children4 ,whatever else we forget1 we never forget the look of mother's hands4 ,as we stood there by the casket1 we could not help but say3 ,don't she look beautiful8 ,it was a cloudless day when1 with heavy hearts1 we carried her out to the last resting-place4 ,the withered leaves crumbled under hoof and wheel as we passed1 and the sun shone on the ,raritan ,river until it looked like fire2 but more calm and beautiful and radiant was the setting sun of that aged pilgrim's life4 ,no more toil1 no more tears1 no more sickness1 no more death4 ,dear mother6 ,beautiful mother6 ,sweet is the slumber beneath the sod1 ,while the pure spirit rests with ,god4 ,i need not go back and show you ,zenobia or ,semiramis or ,isabella as wonders of womanly excellence or greatness1 when ,i in this moment point to your own picture gallery of memory1 and show you the one face that you remember so well1 and arouse all your holy reminiscences1 and start you in new consecration to ,god by the pronunciation of that tender1 beautiful1 glorious word1 ,mother6 mother6 ,,sisterly ,,influence4 ,and his sister stood afar off1 to wit what would be done to him4--,,exodus #b3d4 ,princess ,thermutis1 daughter of ,pharaoh1 looking out through the lattice of her bathing-house1 on the banks of the ,nile1 saw a curious boat on the river4 ,it had neither oar nor helm1 and they would have been useless anyhow4 ,there was only one passenger1 and that a baby boy4 ,but the ,mayflower that brought the ,pilgrim ,fathers to ,america carried not so precious a load4 ,the boat was made of the broad leaves of papyrus tightened together by bitumen4 ,boats were sometimes made of that material1 as we learn from ,pliny1 and ,herodotus1 and ,theophrastus4 ,,miriam',s ,,vigil4 ,kill every ,hebrew boy when he is born1 had been ,pharaoh's order4 ,to save her son1 ,jochebed1 the mother of little ,moses1 had put him in that queer boat and launched him4 ,his sister ,miriam stood on the bank watching that craft with its precious burden4 ,she was far enough off not to draw attention to the boat1 but near enough to offer protection4 ,there she stands on the bank1 ,miriam the poetess1 ,miriam the quick-witted1 ,miriam the faithful1 though very human1 for in after time she became so mad with that very brother for marrying a woman she did not like1 that she made a great family row1 and was struck with leprosy4 ,miriam was a splendid sister1 but had her faults like all the rest of us4 ,how carefully she watched the boat containing her brother6 ,a strong wind might upset it4 ,the buffaloes often found there might in a sudden plunge of thirst sink it4 ,some ravenous water-fowl1 might swoop1 and pick his eyes out with iron beak4 ,some crocodile or hippopotamus crawling through the rushes might craunch the babe4 ,miriam watched and watched until ,princess ,thermutis1 a maiden on each side of her1 holding palm leaves over her head to shelter her from the sun1 came down and entered her bathing-house4 ,when from the lattice she saw that boat she ordered it brought1 and when the leaves were pulled back from the face of the child and the boy looked up he cried aloud1 for he was hungry and frightened1 and would not even let the princess take him4 ,the infant would rather stay hungry than acknowledge any one of the court as mother4 ,,an ,,adroit ,,maiden4 ,now ,miriam1 the sister1 incognito1 no one suspecting her relation to the child1 leaps from the bank and rushes down and offers to get a nurse to pacify the child4 ,consent is given1 she brings ,jochebed1 the baby's mother1 incognito1 not sure of the court knowing that she was the mother1 and when ,jochebed arrived the child stopped crying1 for its fright was calmed and its hunger appeased4 ,you may admire ,jochebed1 the mother1 and all the ages may admire ,moses1 but ,i clap my hands in applause at the behavior of ,miriam1 the faithful1 brilliant1 and strategic sister6 ,go home1 someone might have said to ,miriam4 ,why risk yourself out there alone on the banks of the ,nile1 breathing the miasma and in danger of being attacked of wild beast or ruffian2 go home6 ,no2 ,miriam1 the sister1 most lovingly watched and bravely defended ,moses1 the brother4 ,is he worthy her care and courage8 ,oh1 yes2 the sixty centuries of the world's history have never had so much involved in the arrival of any ship at any port as in the landing of that papyrus boat calked with bitumen4 ,its one passenger was to be a non-such in history4 ,lawyer1 statesman1 politician1 legislator1 organizer1 conqueror1 deliverer4 ,,hebrew ,,legends4 ,he had such remarkable beauty in childhood that ,josephus says1 when he was carried along the road1 people stopped to gaze at him1 and workmen would leave their work to admire him4 ,when the king playfully put his crown upon this boy1 he threw it off indignantly1 and put his foot on it4 ,the king1 fearing that this might be a sign that the child might yet take down his crown1 applied another test4 ,according to the ,jewish legend1 the king ordered two bowls to be put before the child1 one containing rubies1 and the other burning coals4 ,and if he took the coals he was to live1 and if he took the rubies he was to die4 ,for some reason the child took one of the coals1 and put it in his mouth1 so that his life was spared1 although it burned the tongue till he was indistinct of utterance ever after4 ,having come to manhood1 he spread open the palms of his hands in prayer and the ,red ,sea parted to let two million five hundred thousand people escape4 ,and he put the palms of his hands together in prayer and the ,red ,sea closed on a strangulated host4 ,,unique ,,burial4 ,his life was unutterably grand1 his burial must be on the same scale4 ,god would let neither man nor saint nor archangel have anything to do with weaving for him a shroud or digging for him a grave4 ,the omnipotent ,god left ,his throne in heaven one day1 and if the question was asked1 ,whither is the ,king of the ,universe going8 the answer was1 ,i am going down to bury ,moses4 ,and the ,lord took this mightiest of men to the top of a hill1 and the day was clear1 and ,moses ran his eye over the magnificent range of country4 ,here1 the valley of ,esdraelon1 where the final battle of all nations is to be fought2 and yonder1 the mountains ,hermon1 and ,lebanon1 and ,gerizim1 and hills of ,judea2 and the village of ,bethlehem there1 and the city of ,jericho yonder1 and the vast stretch of landscape that almost took the old lawgiver's breath away as he looked at it4 ,and then1 without a pang1 as ,i learn from the statement that the eye of ,moses was undimmed1 and his natural force unabated1 ,god touched the great lawgiver's eyes and they closed2 and his lungs1 and they ceased2 and his heart1 and it stopped2 and commanded1 saying3 ,to the skies1 thou immortal spirit6 ,and then one divine hand was put against the back of ,moses1 and the other hand against the pulseless breast and ,god laid him softly down on ,mount ,nebo1 and then the lawgiver lifted in the ,almighty's arms1 was carried to the opening of a cave and placed in crypt1 and one stroke of the divine hand smoothed the features into an everlasting calm1 and a rock was rolled to the door1 and the only obsequies at which ,god did all the offices of priest1 and undertaker1 and grave-digger1 and mourner were ended4 ,,the ,,world ,,indebted4 ,oh1 was not ,miriam1 the sister of ,moses1 doing a good thing1 an important thing1 a glorious thing when she watched the boat woven of river plants and made water-tight with asphaltum1 carrying its one passenger8 ,did she not put all the ages of time and of a coming eternity under obligation1 when she defended her helpless brother from the perils aquatic1 reptilian1 and ravenous8 ,she it was that brought that wonderful babe and his mother together so that he was reared to be the deliverer of his nation1 when otherwise1 if saved at all from the rushes of the ,nile1 he would have been only one more of the ,god-defying ,pharaohs2 for ,princess ,thermutis1 of the bathing-house1 would have inherited the crown of ,egypt1 and as she had no child of her own1 this adopted child would have come to coronation4 ,had there been no ,miriam there would have been no ,moses4 ,what a garland for faithful sisterhood6 ,for how many a lawgiver1 and how many a hero1 and how many a deliverer1 and how many a saint are the world and the ,church indebted to a watchful1 loving1 faithful1 godly sister8 ,come up out of the farm-houses1 come up out of the inconspicuous homes6 ,come up from the banks of the ,hudson1 and the ,penobscot1 and the ,savannah1 and the ,mobile1 and the ,mississippi1 and all the other ,niles of ,america1 and let us see you1 the ,miriams who watched and protected the leaders in law and medicine and merchandise and art and agriculture and mechanics and religion6 ,if ,i should ask all these physicians1 and attorneys1 and merchants1 and ministers of religion and successful men of all professions and trades who are indebted to an elder sister for good influences1 and perhaps for an education or a prosperous start1 to rise1 they would rise by the hundreds4 ,god knows how many of our ,greek lexicons and how much of our schooling was paid for by money that would otherwise have gone for the replenishing of a sister's wardrobe4 ,while the brother sailed off for a resounding sphere1 the sister watched him from the banks of self-denial4 ,,the ,,elder ,,sister',s ,,power4 ,miriam was the oldest of the family1 ,moses and ,aaron1 her brothers1 are younger4 ,oh1 the power of the elder sister to help decide the brother's character for usefulness and for heaven6 ,she can keep off from her brother more evils than ,miriam could have driven back water-fowl or crocodile from the ark of bulrushes4 ,the older sister decides the direction in which the cradle-boat shall sail4 ,by gentleness1 by good sense1 by ,christian principle she can turn it toward the palace1 not of a wicked ,pharaoh1 but of a holy ,god2 and a brighter princess than ,thermutis shall lift him out of peril1 even religion1 whose ways are ways of pleasantness1 and all her paths are peace4 ,,her ,,toilsome ,,life4 ,the older sister1 how much the world owes her6 ,born while yet the family was in limited circumstances1 she had to hold and take care of her younger brothers4 ,and if there is anything that excites my sympathy it is a little girl lugging round a great fat child1 and getting her ears boxed because she cannot keep him quiet4 ,by the time she gets to young womanhood she is pale and worn out1 and her attractiveness has been sacrificed on the altar of sisterly fidelity1 and she is consigned to celibacy1 and society calls her by an ungallant name1 but in heaven they call her ,miriam4 ,in most families the two most undesirable places in the record of births are the first and the last1 the first because she is worn out with the cares of a home that cannot afford to hire help1 and the last because she is spoiled as a pet4 ,among the grandest equipages that sweep through the streets of heaven will be those occupied by sisters who sacrificed themselves for brothers4 ,they will have the finest of the ,apocalyptic white horses1 and many who on earth looked down upon them will have to turn out to let them1 pass4 ,,help ,,to ,,make ,,men4 ,let sisters not begrudge the time and care bestowed on a brother4 ,it is hard to believe that any boy that you know so well as your brother can ever turn out anything very useful4 ,well1 he may not be a ,moses4 ,there is only one of that kind needed for six thousand years4 ,but ,i tell you what your brother will be--either a blessing or a curse to society1 and a candidate for happiness or wretchedness4 ,he will1 like ,moses1 have the choice between rubies and living coals1 and your influence will have much to do with his decision4 ,he may not1 like ,moses1 be the deliverer of a nation1 but he may1 after your father and mother are gone1 be the deliverer of a household4 ,what thousands of homes to-day are piloted by brothers6 ,there are properties now well invested and yielding income for the support of sisters and younger brothers1 because the older brother rose to the leadership from the day the father laid down to die4 ,whatever you do for your brother will come back to you again4 ,if you set him an ill-natured1 censorious1 unaccommodating example1 it will recoil upon you from his own irritated and despoiled nature4 ,if you1 by patience with all his infirmities and by nobility of character1 dwell with him in the few years of your companionship1 you will have your counsels reflected back upon you some day by his splendor of behavior in some crisis where he would have failed but for you4 ,,teasing ,a ,,family ,,curse4 ,don't snub him4 ,don't depreciate his ability4 ,don't talk discouragingly about his future4 ,don't let ,miriam get down off the bank of the ,nile1 and wade out and upset the ark of bulrushes4 ,don't tease him4 ,brothers and sisters do not consider it any harm to tease4 ,that spirit abroad in the family is one of the meanest and most devilish4 ,there is a teasing that is pleasurable1 and is only another form of innocent raillery1 but that which provokes1 and irritates1 and makes the eye flash with anger is to be reprehended4 ,it would be less blameworthy to take a bunch of thorns and draw them across your sister's cheek1 or to take a knife and draw its sharp edge across your brother's hand till the blood spurts1 for that would damage only the body1 but teasing is the thorn and the knife1 scratching and lacerating the disposition and the soul4 ,it is the curse of innumerable households that the brothers tease the sisters1 and the sisters the brothers4 ,sometimes it is the color of the hair1 or the shape of the features1 or an affair of the heart4 ,sometimes it is by revealing a secret1 or by a suggestive look1 or a guffaw1 or an ,ahem6 ,tease6 ,tease6 ,tease6 ,for ,god's sake quit it4 ,christ says3 ,he that hateth his brother is a murderer4 ,now1 when you1 by teasing1 make your brother or sister hate you1 you turn him or her into a murderer or murderess4 ,,beware ,,of ,,jealousy4 ,don't let jealousy ever touch a sister's soul1 as it so often does1 because her brother gets more honor or more means4 ,even ,miriam1 the heroine of the text1 was struck by that evil passion of jealousy4 ,she had possessed unlimited influence over ,moses1 and now he marries1 and not only so but marries a black woman from ,ethiopia1 and ,miriam is so disgusted and outraged at ,moses1 first because he had married at all1 and next1 because he had practised miscegenation1 that she is drawn into a frenzy1 and then begins to turn white1 and gets white as a corpse1 and then whiter than a corpse4 ,her complexion is like chalk2 the fact is1 she has the ,egyptian leprosy4 ,and now the brother whom she had defended on the ,nile comes to her rescue in a prayer that brings her restoration4 ,let there be no room in all your house for jealousy1 either to sit or stand4 ,it is a leprous abomination4 ,your brother's success1 ,o sisters6 is your success4 ,his victories will be your victories2 for1 while ,moses the brother led the vocal music after the crossing of the ,red ,sea1 ,miriam1 the sister1 with two glittering sheets of brass uplifted and glittering in the sun1 led the instrumental music1 clapping the cymbals till the last frightened neigh of pursuing cavalry horse was smothered in the wave1 and the last ,egyptian helmet went under4 ,,family ,,quarrels4 ,how strong it makes a family when all the sisters and brothers stand together1 and what an awful wreck when they disintegrate1 quarreling about a father's will and making the surrogate's office horrible with their wrangle4 ,better when you were little children in the nursery that with your playhouse mallets you had accidentally killed each other fighting across your cradle1 than that1 having come to the age of maturity1 and having in your veins and arteries the blood of the same father and mother1 you fight each other across the parental grave in the cemetery4 ,,the ,,rothschilds4 ,if you only knew it1 your interests are identical4 ,of all the families of the earth that ever stood together1 perhaps the most conspicuous is the family of the ,rothschilds4 ,as ,mayer ,anselm ,rothschild was about to die in #ahab1 he gathered his children about him1 ,anselm1 ,solomon1 ,nathan1 ,charles and ,james1 and made them promise that they would always be united on ',change4 ,obeying that injunction1 they have been the mightiest commercial power on earth1 and at the raising or lowering of their sceptre1 nations have risen or fallen4 ,that illustrates how much on a large scale1 and for selfish purposes1 a united family may achieve4 ,but suppose that1 instead of a magnitude of dollars as the object1 it be doing good and making salutary impression and raising this sunken world1 how much more ennobling6 ,sister1 you do your part1 and brother will do his part4 ,if ,miriam will lovingly watch the boat on the ,nile1 ,moses will help her when leprous disaster strike4 ,,the ,,family ,,bond4 ,when father and mother are gone1 and they soon will be1 if they have not already made exit1 the sisterly and fraternal bond will be the only ligament that will hold the family together4 ,how many reasons for your deep and unfaltering affection for each other6 ,rocked in the same cradle2 bent over by the same motherly tenderness2 toiled for by the same father's weary arm and aching brow2 with common inheritance of all the family secrets2 and with names given you by parents who started you with the highest hopes for your happiness and prosperity--,i charge you1 be loving and kind and forgiving4 ,if the sister see that the brother never wants a sympathizer1 the brother will see that the sister never wants an escort4 ,oh1 if the sisters of a household knew through what terrific and damning temptations their brother goes in this city life1 they would hardly sleep nights in the anxiety for his salvation6 ,and if you would make a holy conspiracy of kind words and gentle attentions and earnest prayers1 that would save his soul from death and hide a multitude of sins4 ,but let the sister dash off in one direction in discipleship of the world1 and the brother flee off in another direction in dissipation1 and it will not be long before they will meet again at the iron gate of ,despair1 their blistered feet in the hot ashes of a consumed lifetime4 ,alas1 that brothers and sisters1 though living together for years1 very often do not know each other1 and that they see only the imperfections and none of the virtues6 ,a ,,russian ,,banquet4 ,general ,bauer1 of the ,russian cavalry1 had in early life wandered off in the army1 and the family supposed he was dead4 ,after he gained a fortune he encamped one day in ,husam1 his native place1 and made a banquet1 and among the great military men who were to dine1 he invited a plain miller and his wife1 who lived near by1 and who1 affrighted1 came1 fearing some harm would be done them4 ,the miller and his wife were placed one on each side of the general at the table4 ,the general asked the miller all about his family1 and the miller said that he had two brothers and a sister4 ,no other brothers8 ,my younger brother went off with the army many years ago1 and no doubt was long ago killed4 ,then the general said3 ,soldiers1 ,i am this man's younger brother whom he thought was dead4 ,and how loud was the cheer1 and how warm was the embrace6 ,brother and sister1 you need as much of an introduction to each other as they did4 ,you do not know each other4 ,you think your brother is grouty and cross and queer1 and he thinks you are selfish and proud and unlovely4 ,both wrong6 ,that brother will be a prince in some woman's eyes1 and that sister a queen in the estimation of some man4 ,that brother is a magnificent fellow1 and that sister is a morning in ,june4 ,come1 let me introduce you3 ,moses1 this is ,miriam4 ,miriam1 this is ,moses4 ,add seventy-five per cent to your present appreciation of each other1 and when you kiss good-morning2 do not stick up your cold cheek1 wet from the recent washing1 as though you hated to touch each other's lips in affectionate caress4 ,let it have all the fondness and cordiality of a loving sister's kiss4 ,,be ,,agreeable4 ,make yourselves as agreeable and helpful to each other as possible1 remembering that soon you part4 ,the few years of boyhood and girlhood will soon slip by1 and you will go out to homes of your own1 and into the battle with the world and amid ever-changing vicissitudes1 and on paths crossed with graves1 and up steps hard to climb1 and through shadowy ravines4 ,but oh1 my ,god and ,saviour1 may the terminus of the journey be the same as the start1 namely1 at father's and mother's knee1 if they have inherited the kingdom6 ,then1 as in boyhood and girlhood days1 we rushed in after the day's absence with much to tell of exciting adventure1 and father and mother enjoyed the recital as much as we who made it1 so we shall on the hillside of heaven rehearse to them all the scenes of our earthly expedition1 and they shall welcome us home1 as we say3 ,father and mother1 we have come1 and brought our children with us4 ,the old revival hymn described it with glorious repetition3 ,brothers and sisters there will meet1 ,brothers and sisters there will meet1 ,brothers and sisters there will meet1 ,will meet to part no more4 ,i read of a child in the country who was detained at a neighbor's house on a stormy night by some fascinating stories that were being told him1 and then looked out and saw it was so dark he did not dare go home4 ,the incident impressed me the more because in my childhood ,i had much1 the same experience4 ,the boy asked his comrades to go with him1 but they dared not4 ,it got later and later--seven o'clock1 eight o'clock1 nine o'clock4 ,oh1 he said1 ,i wish ,i were home6 ,as he opened the door the last time a blinding flash of the storm and a deafening roar overcame him4 ,but after a while he saw in the distance a lantern1 and lo6 his brother was coming to fetch him home1 and the lad stepped out and with swift feet hastened on to his brother who took him home1 where they were so glad to greet him1 and for a long time supper had been waiting4 ,so may it be when the night of death comes and our earthly friends cannot go with us1 and we dare not go alone2 may our ,brother1 our ,elder ,brother1 our ,friend closer than a brother1 come out to meet us with the light of the promises1 which shall be a lantern to our feet1 and then we will go in to join our loved ones waiting for us1 supper all ready1 the marriage supper of the ,lamb6 ,,trials ,,of ,,housekeeping4 ,lord1 dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone8 bid her therefore that she help me4--,,luke #aj3dj4 ,yonder is a beautiful village homestead4 ,the man of the house is dead and his widow is taking charge of the premises4 ,this is the widow ,martha of ,bethany4 ,yes1 ,i will show you also the pet of the household4 ,this is ,mary1 the youngest sister1 with a book under her arm1 and her face having no appearance of anxiety or perturbation4 ,company has come4 ,christ stands outside the door and1 of course1 there is a good deal of excitement inside the door4 ,the disarranged furniture is hastily put aside1 and the hair is brushed back1 and the dresses are adjusted as well as1 in so short a time1 ,mary and ,martha can attend to these matters4 ,,the ,,welcome ,,to ,,christ4 ,they did not keep ,christ standing at the door until they were newly appareled1 or until they had elaborately arranged their tresses1 then coming out with their affected surprise as though they had not heard the two or three previous knockings1 saying3 ,why1 is that you8 ,no4 ,they were ladies1 and were always presentable1 although they may not have always had on their best1 for none of us always have on our best2 if we did our best would not be worth having on4 ,they throw open the door and greet ,christ4 ,they say3 ,good morning1 ,master2 come in and be seated4 ,christ did not come alone2 ,he had a group of friends with ,him1 and such an influx of city visitors would throw any country home into perturbation4 ,i suppose also the walk from the city had been a good appetizer4 ,the kitchen department that day was a very important department1 and ,i suppose that ,martha had no sooner greeted the guests than she fled to that room4 ,mary had no anxiety about household affairs4 ,she had full confidence that ,martha could get up the best dinner in ,bethany4 ,she seems to say3 ,now1 let us have a division of labor4 ,martha1 you cook and ,i'll sit down and be good4 ,,difference ,,in ,,sisters4 ,so you have often seen a great difference between two sisters4 ,there is ,martha1 hard working1 painstaking1 a good manager1 ever inventive of some new pastry1 or discovering something in the art of cooking and housekeeping4 ,there is ,mary1 also1 fond of conversation1 literary1 so engaged in deep questions of ethics she has no time to attend to the questions of household welfare4 ,it is noon4 ,mary is in the parlor with ,christ4 ,martha is in the kitchen4 ,it would have been better if they had divided the work1 and then they could have divided the opportunity of listening to ,jesus2 but ,mary monopolizes ,christ1 while ,martha swelters at the fire4 ,,trouble ,,in ,,the ,,kitchen4 ,it was a very important thing that they should have a good dinner that day4 ,christ was hungry1 and ,he did not often have a luxurious entertainment4 ,alas1 me6 if the duty had devolved upon ,mary what a repast that would have been6 ,but something went wrong in the kitchen4 ,perhaps the fire would not burn1 or the bread would not bake1 or ,martha scalded her hand1 or something was burned black that ought only to have been made brown2 and ,martha lost her patience1 and forgetting the proprieties of the occasion1 with besweated brow1 and perhaps with pitcher in one hand and tongs in the other1 she rushes out of the kitchen into the presence of ,christ1 saying3 ,lord1 dost ,thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone8 ,christ scolded not a word4 ,if it were scolding ,i should rather have his scolding than anybody else's blessing4 ,there was nothing acerb4 ,he knew ,martha had almost worked herself to death to get ,him something to eat1 and so ,he throws a world of tenderness into ,his intonation as ,he seems to say3 ,my dear woman1 do not worry2 let the dinner go2 sit down on this ottoman beside ,mary1 your younger sister4 ,martha1 ,martha1 thou art careful and troubled about many things1 but one thing is needful4 ,as ,martha throws open that kitchen door ,i look in and see a great many household perplexities and anxieties4 ,,non-,,appreciation4 ,first1 there is the trial of non-appreciation4 ,that is what made ,martha so mad with ,mary4 ,the younger sister had no estimate of her older sister's fatigues4 ,as now1 men bothered with the anxieties of the store1 and office1 and shop1 or coming from the ,stock ,exchange1 they say when they get home3 ,oh1 you ought to be in our factory a little while2 you ought to have to manage eight1 or ten1 or twenty subordinates1 and then you would know what trouble and anxiety are6 ,oh1 sir1 the wife and the mother has to conduct at the same time a university1 a clothing establishment1 a restaurant1 a laundry1 a library1 while she is health officer1 police and president of her realm6 ,she must do a thousand things1 and do them well1 in order to keep things going smoothly2 and so her brain and her nerves are taxed to the utmost4 ,i know there are housekeepers who are so fortunate that they can sit in an arm-chair in the library1 or lie on the belated pillow1 and throw off all the care upon subordinates who1 having large wages and great experience1 can attend to all of the affairs of the household4 ,those are the exception4 ,i am speaking this morning of the great mass of housekeepers--the women to whom life is a struggle1 and who1 at thirty years of age1 look as though they were forty1 and at forty look as though they were fifty1 and at fifty look as though they were sixty4 ,the fallen at ,chalons1 and ,austerlitz1 and ,gettysburg1 and ,waterloo are a small number compared with the slain in the great ,armageddon of the kitchen4 ,you go out to the cemetery and you will see that the tombstones all read beautifully poetic2 but if those tombstones would speak the truth thousands of them would say3 ,here lies a woman killed by too much mending1 and sewing1 and baking1 and scrubbing1 and scouring2 the weapon with which she was slain was a broom1 or a sewing machine1 or a ladle4 ,a ,,wearing ,,life4 ,you think1 ,o man of the world6 that you have all the cares and anxieties4 ,if the cares and anxieties of the household should come upon you for one week you would be a fit candidate for ,bloomingdale--,i mean insane asylum4 ,the half-rested housekeeper arises in the morning4 ,she must have the morning repast prepared at an irrevocable hour4 ,what if the fire will not light2 what if the marketing did not come2 what if the clock has stopped--no matter1 she must have the morning repast at an irrevocable hour4 ,then the children must be got off to school4 ,what if their garments are torn2 what if they do not know their lessons2 what if they have lost a hat or sash--they must be ready4 ,then you have all the diet of the day1 and perhaps of several days1 to plan2 but what if the butcher has sent meat unmasticable1 or the grocer has sent articles of food adulterated1 and what if some piece of silver be gone1 or some favorite chalice be cracked1 or the roof leak1 or the plumbing fail1 or any one of a thousand things occur--you must be ready4 ,spring weather comes1 and there must be a revolution in the family wardrobe1 or autumn comes1 and you must shut out the northern blast2 but what if the moth has preceded you to the chest2 what if1 during the year1 the children have outgrown the apparel of last year2 what if the fashions have changed4 ,your house must be an apothecary's shop2 it must be a dispensary2 there must be medicines for all sorts of ailments--something to loosen the croup1 something to cool the burn1 something to poultice the inflammation1 something to silence the jumping tooth1 something to soothe the ear-ache4 ,you must be in half a dozen places at the same time1 or you must attempt to be4 ,,assured ,,sympathy4 ,if1 under all this wear and tear of life1 ,martha makes an impatient rush upon the library or drawing room1 be patient1 be lenient4 ,oh1 woman1 though ,i may fail to stir up an appreciation in the souls of others in regard to your household toils let me assure you1 from the kindliness with which ,jesus ,christ met ,martha1 that he appreciates all your work from garret to cellar2 and that the ,god of ,deborah1 and ,hannah1 and ,abigail and ,grandmother ,lois1 and ,elizabeth ,fry1 and ,hannah ,more is the ,god of the housekeeper4 ,jesus was never married that he might be the especial friend and confidante of a whole world of troubled womanhood4 ,i blunder2 ,christ was married4 ,the ,bible says that the ,church is the ,lamb's wife1 and that makes me know that all ,christian women have a right to go to ,christ and tell ,him of their annoyances and troubles1 since by ,his oath of conjugal fidelity ,he is sworn to sympathize4 ,george ,herbert1 the ,christian poet1 wrote two or three verses on this subject3 ,the servant by this clause ,makes drudgery divine2 ,who sweeps a room1 as for ,thy laws1 ,makes this and the action fine4 ,again1 there is the trial of ,,severe ,,economy4 ,nine hundred and ninety-nine households out of the thousand are subjected to it--some under more and some under less stress of circumstances4 ,especially if a man smoke very expensive cigars1 and take very costly dinners at the restaurants1 he will be severe in demanding domestic economies4 ,this is what kills tens of thousands of women--attempting to make five dollars do the work of seven4 ,how the bills come in6 ,the woman is the banker of the household2 she is the president1 the cashier1 the teller1 the discount clerk2 and there is a panic every few weeks6 ,this thirty years' war against high prices1 this perpetual study of economics1 this life-long attempt to keep the outgoes less than the income1 exhausts millions of housekeepers4 ,a ,,preparation4 ,oh1 my sister1 this is a part of the divine discipline6 ,if it were best for you1 all you would have to do would be to open the front windows and the ravens would fly in with food2 and after you had baked fifty times from the barrel in the pantry the barrel1 like the one of ,zarephath1 would be full2 and the shoes of the children would last as long as the shoes of the ,israelites in the wilderness--forty years4 ,beside that1 this is going to make heaven the more attractive in the contrast4 ,they never hunger there1 and consequently there will be none of the nuisances of catering for appetites4 ,and in the land of the white robe they never have to mend anything1 and the air in that hill country makes everybody well4 ,there are no rents to pay2 every man owns his own house1 and a mansion at that4 ,it will not be so great a change for you to have a chariot in heaven if you have been in the habit of riding in this world4 ,it will not be so great a change for you to sit down on the banks of the river of life if in this world you had a country-seat2 but if you have walked with tired feet in this world what a glorious change to mount celestial equipage2 and if your life on earth was domestic martyrdom1 oh1 the joy of an eternity in which you shall have nothing to do except what you choose to do6 ,martha has had no drudgery for eighteen centuries6 ,i quarrel with the theologians who want to distribute all the thrones of heaven among the ,john ,knoxes and the ,hugh ,latimers1 and the ,theban ,legion4 ,some of the brightest thrones of heaven will be kept for ,christian housekeepers4 ,oh1 what a change from here to there--from the time when they put down the rolling-pin to when they take up the sceptre6 ,if ,chatsworth ,park and the ,vanderbilt mansion on ,fifth ,avenue were to be lifted into the celestial city they would be considered uninhabitable rookeries1 and glorified ,lazarus would be ashamed to be seen going in and out of either of them4 ,,the ,,trial ,,of ,,sickness4 ,there are many housekeepers who could get along with their toils if it were not for sickness and trouble4 ,the fact is1 one-half of the women of the land are more or less invalids4 ,the mountain lass1 who has never had an ache or pain1 may consider household toil inconsiderable1 and toward evening she may skip away miles to the fields and drive home the cattle1 and she may until ten o'clock at night fill the house with laughing racket2 but oh1 to do the work of life with wornout constitution1 when whooping cough has been raging for six weeks in the household1 making the night as sleepless as the day--that is not so easy4 ,perhaps this comes after the nerves have been shattered by some bereavement that has left desolation in every room of the house1 and set the crib in the garret1 because the occupant has been hushed into a slumber which needs no mother's lullaby4 ,oh1 she could provide for the whole group a great deal better than she can for a part of the group now the rest are gone6 ,though you may tell her ,god is taking care of those who are gone1 it is mother-like to brood both flocks2 and one wing she puts over the flock in the house1 the other wing she puts over the flock in the grave4 ,there is nothing but the old-fashioned religion of ,jesus ,christ that will take a woman through the trials of home life4 ,at first there may be a romance or a novelty that will do for a substitute4 ,the marriage hour has just passed1 and the perplexities of the household are more than atoned by the joy of being together1 and by the fact that when it is late they do not have to discuss the question as to whether it is time to go6 ,the mishaps of the household1 instead of being a matter of anxiety and apprehension1 are a matter of merriment--the loaf of bread turned into a geological specimen2 the slushy custards2 the jaundiced or measly biscuits4 ,it is a very bright sunlight that falls on the cutlery and the mantel ornaments of a new home4 ,,the ,,prose ,,of ,,matrimony4 ,but after a while the romance is all gone1 and then there is something to be prepared for the table that the book called ,cookery ,taught in ,twelve ,lessons will not teach4 ,the receipt for making it is not a handful of this1 a cup of that and a spoonful of something else4 ,it is not something sweetened with ordinary condiments1 or flavored with ordinary flavors1 or baked in ordinary ovens4 ,it is the loaf of domestic happiness2 and all the ingredients come down from heaven1 and the fruits are plucked from the tree of life1 and it is sweetened with the new wine of the kingdom1 and it is baked in the oven of home trial4 ,solomon wrote out of his own experience4 ,he had a wretched home4 ,a man cannot be happy with two wives1 much less six hundred2 and he says1 writing out of his own experience3 ,better is a dinner of herbs where love is1 than a stalled ox and hatred therewith4 ,,glorious ,,self-,,sacrifice4 ,how great are the responsibilities of housekeepers6 ,sometimes an indigestible article of food1 by its effect upon a commander or king1 has defeated an army or over-thrown an empire4 ,housekeepers by the food they provide1 by the couches they spread1 by the books they introduce1 by the influences they bring around the home1 are deciding the physical1 intellectual1 moral1 eternal destiny of the race4 ,you say your life is one of sacrifice4 ,i know it4 ,but1 my sisters1 that is the only life worth living4 ,that was ,florence ,nightingale's life2 that was ,payson's life2 that was ,christ's life4 ,we admire it in others1 but how very hard it is for us to cultivate ourselves4 ,when in this city young ,dr4 ,hutchison1 having spent a whole night in a diphtheritic room for the relief of a patient1 became saturated with the poison and died1 we all felt as if we would like to put garlands on his grave2 everybody appreciates that4 ,when in the burning hotel at ,st4 ,louis a young man on the fifth story broke open the door of the room where his mother was sleeping1 and plunged in amid smoke and fire1 crying3 ,mother6 where are you8 and never came out1 our hearts applauded that young man4 ,but how few of us have the ,christ-like spirit--a willingness to suffer for others6 ,a ,,barbarous ,,pedagogue4 ,a rough teacher in a school called upon a poor1 half-starved lad1 who had offended against the laws of the school1 and said3 ,take off your coat directly1 sir4 ,the boy refused to take it off1 whereupon the teacher said again3 ,take off your coat1 sir1 as he swung the whip through the air4 ,the boy refused4 ,it was not because he was afraid of the lash--he was used to that at home--but it was from shame2 he had no undergarment1 and as at the third command he pulled slowly off his coat there went a sob through the school4 ,they saw then why he did not want to remove his coat1 and they saw the shoulder-blades had almost cut through the skin1 and a stout1 healthy boy rose up and went to the teacher of the school and said3 ,oh1 sir1 please don't hurt this poor fellow2 whip me2 see1 he's nothing but a poor chap2 don't you hurt him1 he's poor2 whip me4 ,well1 said the teacher1 it's going to be a severe whipping2 ,i am willing to take you as a substitute4 ,well1 said the boy1 ,i don't care2 you whip me1 if you will let this poor fellow go4 ,the stout1 healthy boy took the scourging without an outcry4#d ,bravo1 says every man--,bravo6 ,how many of us are willing to take the scourging1 and the suffering1 and the toil1 and the anxiety for other people6 ,beautiful thing to admire1 but how little we have of that spirit6 ,god give us that self-denying spirit1 so that whether we are in humble spheres or in conspicuous spheres we may perform our whole duty--for this struggle will soon be over4 ,a ,,christian ,,housekeeper4 ,one of the most affecting reminiscences of my mother is my remembrance of her as a ,christian housekeeper4 ,she worked very hard1 and when we would come in from summer play1 and sit down at the table at noon1 ,i remember how she used to come in with beads of perspiration along the line of gray hair1 and how sometimes she would sit down at the table and put her head against her wrinkled hand and say3 ,well1 the fact is1 ,i'm too tired to eat4 ,long after she might have delegated this duty to others she would not be satisfied unless she attended to the matter herself4 ,in fact1 we all preferred to have her do so1 for somehow things tasted better when she prepared them4 ,some time ago1 in an express train1 ,i shot past that old homestead4 ,i looked out of the window and tried to peer through the darkness4 ,while ,i was doing so one of my old schoolmates1 whom ,i had not seen for many years1 tapped me on the shoulder and said3 ,de ,witt1 ,i see you are looking out at the scenes of your boyhood4 ,oh1 yes1 ,i replied1 ,i was looking out at the old place where my mother lived and died4 ,that night1 in the cars1 the whole scene came back to me4 ,there was the country home4 ,there was the noonday table4 ,there were the children on either side of the table1 most of them gone never to come back4 ,at one end of the table my father1 with a smile that never left his countenance even when he lay in his coffin4 ,it was an eighty-six years' smile--not the smile of inanimation1 but of ,christian courage and of ,christian hope4 ,at the other end of the table was a beautiful1 benignant1 hard-working1 aged ,christian housekeeper1 my mother4 ,she was very tired4 ,i am glad she has so good a place to rest in4 ,blessed are the dead who die in the ,lord2 they rest from their labors1 and their works do follow them4 ,,footnotes3 #d ,it may be hoped that the savage who administered it received the attention of the ,board of ,education4 ,a man so grossly unjust should be in the ,penitentiary4 ,,woman ,,enthroned4 ,there are threescore queens4--,,solomon',s ,,song #f3h4 ,so ,solomon1 by one stroke1 sets forth the imperial character of a true ,christian woman4 ,she is not a slave1 not a hireling1 not a subordinate1 but a queen2 and in my text ,solomon sees sixty of these helping to make up the royal pageant of ,jesus4 ,crown and courtly attendants and imperial wardrobe are not necessary to make a queen1 but graces of the heart and life will give coronation to any woman4 ,woman's position is higher in the world than man's1 and although she has often been denied the right of suffrage1 she always does vote1 and always will vote1 by her influence1 and her chief desire ought to be that she should have grace rightly to rule in the dominion which she has already won4 ,my chief anxiety is not that woman have other rights accorded her1 but that she by the grace of ,god rise up to the appreciation of the glorious rights she already possesses4 ,i shall enumerate some of those rights this morning4 ,i4 ,in the first place1 woman has the special and superlative right of blessing and ,,comforting ,,the ,,sick4 ,what land1 what street1 what house has not felt the smitings of disease8 ,tens of thousands of sick-beds6 ,what shall we do with them8 ,shall man1 with his rough hand and heavy foot and impatient bearing1 minister8 ,no4 ,he cannot soothe the pain4 ,he cannot quiet the nerves4 ,he knows not where to set the light4 ,his hand is not steady enough to pour out the drops4 ,he is not wakeful enough to be watcher4 ,the ,lord ,god1 who sent ,miss ,dix into the ,virginia hospitals1 and ,florence ,nightingale into the ,crimea1 and the ,maid of ,saragossa to appease the wounds of the battlefield1 has equipped wife1 mother1 and daughter for this delicate but tremendous mission4 ,you have known men who despised woman1 but the moment disease fell upon them1 they did not send for their friends at the bank1 or their partner in business1 or their worldly associates4 ,their first cry was1 ,take me to my wife4 ,the dissipated young man at the college scoffs at the idea of being under home influences1 but at the first blast of the typhoid fever on his cheek he says1 ,,where ,,is ,,mother8 ,i think one of the most pathetic passages in all the ,bible is the description of the lad who went out to the harvest-field of ,shunem and got sun-struck1 throwing his hands on his temples and crying out1 ,oh1 my head6 my head6 and they said3 ,carry him to his mother4 ,and then the record is3 ,he sat on her knees till noon1 and then died4 ,it is an awful thing to be ill away from home in a strange hotel1 once in a while men coming in to look at you1 holding their hand over their mouth for fear they will catch the contagion4 ,how roughly they turn you in the bed6 ,how loudly they talk6 ,how you long for the ministries of home6 ,i knew one such who went away from one of the brightest of homes for several weeks' business absence at the ,west4 ,a telegram came at midnight that he was on his death-bed1 far away from home4 ,by express train the wife and daughters went westward2 but they went too late4 ,he feared not to die2 but he was in an agony to live until his family got there4 ,he tried to bribe the doctor to make him live a little while longer4 ,he said3 ,i am willing to die1 but not alone4 ,but the pulses fluttered1 the eyes closed1 and the heart stopped4 ,the express trains met in the midnight--wife and daughters going westward1 lifeless remains of husband and father coming eastward4 ,oh1 it was a sad1 pitiful1 overwhelming spectacle6 ,when we are sick we want to be sick at home4 ,when the time comes for us to die1 ,,we ,,want ,,to ,,die ,,at ,,home4 ,the room may be very humble1 and the faces that look into ours may be very plain2 but who cares for that8 ,loving hands to bathe the temples2 loving voices to speak good cheer2 loving lips to read the comforting promises of ,jesus4 ,in the war men cast the cannon2 men fashioned the musketry2 men cried to the hosts1 ,forward1 march6 men hurled their battalions on the sharp edges of the enemy1 crying1 ,charge6 charge6 but woman scraped the lint2 woman administered the cordials2 woman watched by the dying couch2 woman wrote the last message to the home circle2 woman wept at the solitary burial1 attended by herself and four men with a spade4 ,we greeted the generals home with brass bands and triumphal arches and wild huzzas2 but the story is too good to be written anywhere1 save in ,,the ,,chronicles ,,of ,,heaven1 of ,mrs4 ,brady1 who came down among the sick in the swamps of the ,chickahominy2 of ,annie ,ross in the cooper-shop hospital2 of ,margaret ,breckinridge1 who came to men who had been for weeks with their wounds undressed1 some of them frozen to the ground1 and when she turned them over1 those who had an arm left waved it1 and filled the air with their hurrah6--of ,mrs4 ,hodge1 who came from ,chicago with blankets and with pillows1 until the men shouted3 ,three cheers for the ,christian-,commission6 ,god bless the women at home6 then sitting down to take the last message3 ,tell my wife not to fret about me1 but to meet me in heaven2 tell her to train up the boys whom we have loved so well2 tell her we shall meet again in the good land2 tell her to bear my loss like the ,christian wife of a ,christian soldier--and of ,mrs4 ,shelton1 into whose face the convalescent soldier looked and said3 ,your grapes and cologne cured me4 ,men did their work with shot1 and shell1 and carbine1 and howitzer2 ,,women ,,did ,,their ,,work with socks1 and slippers1 and bandages1 and warm drinks1 and ,scripture texts1 and gentle strokings of the hot temples1 and stories of that land where they never have any pain4 ,men knelt down over the wounded and said3 ,on which side did you fight8 ,women knelt down over the wounded and said3 ,where are you hurt8 ,what nice thing can ,i make for you to eat8 ,what makes you cry8 ,to-night1 while we men are sound asleep in our beds1 there will be a light in yonder loft2 there will be groaning down that dark alley2 there will be cries of distress in that cellar4 ,men will sleep1 and women will watch4 ,,ii4 ,again1 woman has a superlative right to take ,,care ,,of ,,the ,,poor4 ,there are hundreds and thousands of them in all our cities4 ,there is a kind of work that men cannot do for the poor4 ,here comes a group of little barefoot children to the door of the ,dorcas ,society4 ,they need to be clothed and provided for4 ,which of these directors of banks would know how many yards it would take to make that little girl a dress8 ,which of these masculine hands could fit a hat to that little girl's head8 ,which of the wise men would know how to tie on that new pair of shoes8 ,man sometimes gives his charity in a rough way1 and it falls like the fruit of a tree in the ,east1 which fruit comes down so heavily that it breaks the skull of the man who is trying to gather it4 ,but woman glides so softly into the house of destitution1 and finds out all the sorrows of the place1 and puts so quietly the donation on the table1 that all the family come out on the front steps as she departs1 expecting that from under her shawl she will thrust out two wings and go right up toward heaven1 from whence she seems to have come down4 ,o ,christian young woman1 if you would make yourself happy and win the blessing of ,christ1 go out ,,among ,,the ,,destitute6 ,a loaf of bread or a bundle of socks may make a homely load to carry2 but the angels of ,god will come out to watch1 and the ,lord ,almighty will give ,his messenger hosts a charge1 saying1 ,look after that woman2 canopy her with your wings and shelter her from all harm2 and while you are seated in the house of destitution and suffering1 the little ones around the room will whisper1 ,who is she8 ,ain't she beautiful8 and if you will listen right sharply1 you will hear dripping down through the leaky roof1 and rolling over the rotten stairs1 the angel chant that shook ,bethlehem3 ,glory to ,god in the highest1 and on earth peace1 good-will to men4 ,can you tell me why a ,christian woman1 going-down among ,,the ,,haunts ,,of ,,iniquity on a ,christian errand1 never meets with any indignity8 ,i stood in the chapel of ,helen ,chalmers1 the daughter of the celebrated ,dr4 ,chalmers1 in the most abandoned part of the city of ,edinburgh2 and ,i said to her1 as ,i looked around upon the fearful surroundings of that place1 ,do you come here nights to hold a service8 ,oh yes1 she said1 ,i take my lantern and ,i go through all these haunts of sin1 the darkest and the worst2 and ,i ask all the men and women to come to the chapel2 and then ,i sing for them1 and ,i pray for them1 and ,i talk to them4 ,i said1 ,can it be possible that you never meet with an insult while performing this ,christian errand8 ,never1 she said1 never4 ,that young woman who has her father by her side walking down the street1 and an armed police at each corner1 is not so well defended as that ,christian woman who goes forth on gospel work into the haunts of iniquity1 carrying ,bibles and bread4 ,some one said1 ,i dislike very much to see that ,christian woman teaching those bad boys ,,in ,,the ,,mission ,,school2 ,i am afraid to have her instruct them4 ,so1 said another man1 ,i am afraid too4 ,said the first3 ,i am afraid they will use vile language before they leave the place4 ,ah6 said the other man1 ,i am not afraid of that4 ,what ,i am afraid of is that if any of those boys should use a bad word in that presence1 the other boys would tear him to pieces and kill him on the spot4 ,,solicitation ,,of ,,charities4 ,backed up by barrels in which there is no flour1 and by stoves in which there is no fire1 and by wardrobes in which there are no clothes1 a woman is irresistible2 passing on her errand1 ,god says to her1 ,you go into that bank1 or store1 or shop1 and get the money4 ,she goes in and gets it4 ,the man is hard-fisted1 but she gets it4 ,she could not help but get it4 ,it is decreed from eternity she should get it4 ,no need of your turning your back and pretending you don't hear2 you do hear4 ,there is no need of your saying you are begged to death4 ,there is no need of your wasting your time1 and you might as well submit first as last4 ,you had better right away take down your cheque-book1 mark the number of the cheque1 fill up the blank1 sign your name1 and hand it to her4 ,there is no need of wasting time4 ,those poor children on the back street have been hungry long enough4 ,that sick man must have some farina4 ,that consumptive must have something to ease his cough4 ,i meet this delegate of a relief society coming out of the store of such a hard-fisted man1 and ,i say1 ,did you get the money8 ,of course1 she says1 ,i got the money2 that's what ,i went for4 ,the ,lord told me to go in and get it1 and ,he never sends me on a fool's errand4 ,,iii4 ,again ,i have to tell you that it is woman's specific ,,right ,,to ,,comfort under the stress of dire disaster4 ,she is called the weaker vessel2 but all profane as well as sacred history attests that1 when the crisis comes1 she is better prepared than man to meet the emergency4 ,how often you have seen a woman who seemed to be a disciple of frivolity and indolence1 who1 under one stroke of calamity1 changed to a heroine4 ,oh1 what a great mistake those business men make who never tell their business troubles to their wives6 ,there comes some great loss to their store1 or some of their companions in business play them a sad trick1 and they carry the burden all alone4 ,he is asked in the household1 again and again1 ,what is the matter8 but he believes it a sort of ,christian duty to keep all that trouble within his own soul4 ,oh sir1 your first duty was to ,,tell ,,your ,,wife all about it4 ,she perhaps might not have disentangled your finances or extended your credit1 but she would have helped you to bear misfortune4 ,you have no right to carry on one shoulder that which is intended for two4 ,there are business men here who know what ,i mean4 ,there came a crisis in your affairs4 ,you struggled bravely and long2 but after a while there came a day when you said1 ,here ,i shall have to stop1 and you called in your partners1 and you called in the most prominent men in your employ1 and you said1 ,we have got to stop4 ,you left the store suddenly4 ,you could hardly make up your mind to pass through the street and over on the ferry-boat4 ,you felt everybody would be looking at you1 and blaming you1 and denouncing you4 ,you hastened home4 ,you told your wife all about the affair4 ,what did she say8 ,did she play the butterfly8 ,did she talk about the silks and the ribbons and the fashions8 ,no4 ,she came up to the emergency4 ,she quailed not under the stroke4 ,she helped you begin to plan right away4 ,she offered to go out of the comfortable house into a smaller one1 and wear the old cloak another winter4 ,she was one who understood your affairs without blaming you4 ,you looked upon what you thought was a thin1 weak woman's arm holding you up2 but while you looked at that arm1 there came into the feeble muscles of it the strength of the eternal ,god4 ,no chiding4 ,no fretting4 ,no telling you about the beautiful house of her father1 from which you brought her ten1 twenty1 or thirty years ago4 ,you said1 ,well1 this is the happiest day of my life4 ,i am glad ,i have got from under my burden4 ,my wife don't care--,i don't care4 ,at the moment you were utterly exhausted4 ,god sent a ,deborah to meet the host of the ,amalekites1 and scatter them like chaff over the plain4 ,there are sometimes women who sit reading sentimental novels1 and who wish that they had some grand field in which to display their ,christian powers4 ,oh1 what grand and glorious things they could do if they only had an opportunity6 ,my sister1 you need not wait for any such time4 ,a crisis will come in your affairs4 ,there will be a ,thermopylae in your own household1 where ,god will tell you to stand4 ,there are scores and hundreds of households in this city to-day where as much bravery and courage are demanded of women as was exhibited by ,grace ,darling1 or ,marie ,antoinette1 or ,joan of ,arc4 ,,iv4 ,again1 ,i remark1 it is woman's right to ,,bring ,,to ,,us ,,the ,,kingdom of heaven4 ,it is easier for a woman to be a ,christian than for a man4 ,why8 ,you say she is weaker4 ,no4 ,her heart is more responsive to the pleadings of divine love4 ,she is in vast majority4 ,the fact that she can more easily become a ,christian ,i prove by the statement that three-fourths of the members of the churches in all ,christendom are women4 ,so ,god appoints them to be the chief agencies for bringing this world back to ,god4 ,,the ,,greatest ,,sermons are not preached on celebrated platforms2 they are preached with an audience of two or three1 and in private home life4 ,a consistent1 consecrated ,christian service is an unanswerable demonstration of ,god's truth4 ,a group of rough men were assembled at a tavern one night4 ,it came on toward morning--one or two o'clock4 ,one man boasted that it did not make any difference what time he went home1 his wife cheerfully opened the door1 and provided an entertainment if he was hungry when he got home4 ,so they laid a wager4 ,they said3 ,now1 we'll go along with you4 ,so much shall be wagered4 ,we'll bet so much that when you go home and make such a demand she will resist it4 ,so they went along at two or three o'clock in the morning and knocked at the door4 ,the door opened1 and the man said to his wife1 ,get us a supper4 ,she said1 ,what shall ,i get8 ,he selected the articles of food4 ,very cheerfully were they provided1 and about three or four o'clock in the morning they sat down at the table--the most cheerful one in all that presence the ,christian wife--when the man1 the ruffian1 the villain who had demanded all this1 broke into tears1 and said3 ,i can't stand this4 ,oh1 what a wretch ,i am6 ,he disbanded that group4 ,he knelt down with his ,christian wife and asked her to pray for the salvation of his immortal soul1 and before the morning dawned they were united in the faith and hope of the ,gospel4 ,a patient1 loving1 ,christian demeanor in the presence of transgression1 in the presence of hardness1 in the presence of obduracy and crime1 is an argument from the throne of the ,lord ,almighty1 and blessed is that woman who can wield such an argument4 ,a sailor came slipping down the ratline one night1 as though something had happened1 and the sailors cried1 ,what's the matter8 ,he said1 ,,my ,,mother',s ,,prayers haunt me like a ghost4 ,home influences1 consecrated ,christian home influences1 are the mightiest of all influences upon the soul4 ,there are men here to-day who have maintained their integrity1 not because they were any better naturally than some other people1 but because there were home influences praying for them all the time4 ,they got a good start4 ,they were launched on the world with the benedictions of a ,christian mother4 ,they may track ,siberian snows1 they may plunge into ,african jungles1 they may fly to the earth's end1 they cannot go so far and so fast but the prayers will keep up with them4 ,i stand before women this morning who have the eternal salvation of their husbands in their right hand4 ,on the marriage-day you took an oath before men and angels that you would be faithful and kind until death did you part1 and ,i believe you are going to keep that oath2 but after that parting at the door of the grave1 will it be an eternal separation8 ,is there any such thing as ,,an ,,immortal ,,marriage1 making the flowers that grow on the top of the sepulchre brighter than the garlands which at the marriage banquet flooded the air with aroma8 ,yes2 ,i stand here as a priest of the most high ,god to proclaim the banns of an immortal union for all those who join hands in the grace of ,christ4 ,o woman1 is your husband1 your father1 your son away from ,god8 ,the ,lord demands their redemption at your hands4 ,there are prayers for you to offer1 there are exhortations for you to give1 there are examples for you to make2 and ,i say now1 this morning1 as ,paul said to the ,corinthian woman3 ,what knowest thou1 ,o woman1 but thou canst save thy husband8 ,a man was dying1 and he said to his wife3 ,rebecca1 you wouldn't let me have family prayers1 and you laughed about all that1 and you got me away into worldliness2 and now ,i am going to die1 and my fate is sealed1 and you are ,,the ,,cause ,,of ,,my ,,ruin4 ,o woman1 what knowest thou but thou canst destroy thy husband8 ,are there not some here who have kindly influences at home--are there not some here who have wandered far away from ,god1 who can remember the ,christian influences in their early home8 ,do not despise those influences1 my brother4 ,if you die without ,christ1 what will you do with your mother's prayers1 with your wife's importunities1 with your sister's entreaties8 ,what will you do with the letters they used to write to you1 with the memory of those days when they attended you so kindly in times of sickness8 ,oh1 if there be but just one strand holding you from floating off on that dark sea1 ,i would just like1 this morning1 to take hold of that strand and pull you to the beach4 ,for the sake of your wife's ,god1 for the sake of your mother's ,god1 for the sake of your daughter's ,god1 for the sake of your sister's ,god1 come this day and be saved4 ,v4 ,lastly1 ,i wish to say that one of the specific rights of women is1 through the grace of ,christ1 finally ,,to ,,reach ,,heaven4 ,oh1 what a multitude of women in heaven6 ,mary1 ,christ's mother1 in heaven2 ,elizabeth ,fry in heaven2 ,charlotte ,elizabeth in heaven2 the mother of ,augustine in heaven2 the ,countess of ,huntingdon--who sold her splendid jewels to build chapels--in heaven2 while a great many others1 who have never been heard of on earth1 or known but little1 have gone into the rest and peace of heaven4 ,what a rest6 ,what a change it was from the small room1 with no fire and one window1 the glass broken out1 and the aching side and worn-out eyes1 to the house of many mansions6 ,no more stitching until twelve o'clock at night1 no more thrusting of the thumb by the employer through the work to show it was not done quite right4 ,plenty of bread at last4 ,heaven for aching heads4 ,heaven for broken hearts4 ,heaven for anguish-bitten frames4 ,no more sitting up until midnight for the coming of staggering steps4 ,no more rough blows across the temples4 ,no more sharp1 keen1 bitter curse4 ,some of you will have no rest in this world4 ,it will be toil and struggle and suffering all the way up4 ,you will have to stand at your door fighting back the wolf with your own hand red with carnage4 ,but ,god has a crown for you4 ,i want you to realize1 this morning1 that ,he is now making it1 and whenever you weep a tear ,he sets another gem in that crown1 whenever you have a pang of body or soul ,he puts another gem in that crown1 until1 after a while1 in all the tiara there will be no room for another splendor1 and ,god will say to ,his angel1 ,the crown is done2 let her up that she may wear it4 ,and as the ,lord of ,righteousness puts the crown upon your brow1 angel will cry to angel1 ,who is she8 and ,christ will say1 ,i will tell you who she is4 ,she is the one that came up out of great tribulation1 and had her robe washed and made white in the blood of the ,lamb4 ,a ,,banquet4 ,and then ,god will spread a banquet1 and ,he will invite all the principalities of heaven to sit at the feast2 and the tables will blush with the best clusters from the vineyards of ,god1 and crimson with the twelve manner of fruits from the ,tree of ,life2 and water from the fountains of the rock will flash from the golden tankards2 and the old harpers of heaven will sit there making music with their harps2 and ,christ will point you out amid the celebrities of heaven1 saying1 ,she suffered with me on earth1 now we are going to be glorified together4 ,and the banqueters1 no longer able to hold their peace1 will break forth with congratulation1 ,hail6 hail6 ,and there will be handwritings on the wall--not such as struck the ,persian noblemen with horror1 but fire-tipped fingers writing in blazing capitals of light and love and victory3 ,god hath wiped away all tears from all faces6 ,,the ,,old ,,folks' ,,visit4 ,i will go and see him before ,i die4--,,gen4 #de3bh4 ,jacob had long since passed the hundred year mile-stone4 ,in those times people were distinguished for longevity4 ,in the centuries after persons lived to great age4 ,galen1 the most celebrated physician of his time1 took so little of his own medicine1 that he lived to one hundred and forty years4 ,a man of undoubted veracity on the witness-stand in ,england swore that he remembered an event one hundred and fifty years before4 ,lord ,bacon speaks of a countess who had cut three sets of teeth1 and died at one hundred and forty years4 ,joseph ,crele1 of ,pennsylvania1 lived one hundred and forty years4 ,in #aheg a book was printed containing the names of thirty-seven person who lived one hundred and forty years1 and the names of eleven persons who lived one hundred and fifty years4 ,among the grand old people of whom we have record was ,jacob1 the shepherd of the text4 ,but he had ,a ,,bad ,,lot ,,of ,,boys4 ,they were jealous and ambitious and every way unprincipled4 ,joseph1 however1 seemed to be an exception2 but he had been gone many years1 and the probability was that he was dead4 ,as sometimes now in a house you will find kept at the table a vacant chair1 a plate1 a knife1 a fork1 for some deceased member of the family1 so ,jacob kept in his heart a place for his beloved ,joseph4 ,there sits the old man1 the flock of one hundred and forty years in their flight having alighted long enough to leave the marks of their claw on forehead and cheek and temple4 ,his long beard snows down over his chest4 ,his eyes are somewhat dim1 and he can see further when they are closed than when they are open1 for he can see clear back into the time when beautiful ,rachel1 his wife1 was living1 and his children shook the ,oriental abode with their merriment4 ,the centenarian is sitting dreaming over the past when he hears a wagon rumbling to the front door4 ,he gets up and goes to the door to see who has arrived1 and his long absent sons from ,egypt come in and announce to him that ,joseph instead of being dead is living in an ,egyptian palace1 with all the investiture of prime minister1 next to the king in the mightiest empire of all the world6 ,,the ,,news ,,was ,,too ,,sudden and too glad for the old man1 and his cheeks whiten1 and he has a dazed look1 and his staff falls out of his hand1 and he would have dropped had not the sons caught him and led him to a lounge and put cold water on his face1 and fanned him a little4 ,in that half delirium the old man mumbles something about his son ,joseph4 ,he says3 ,you do not mean ,joseph1 do you8 my dear son who has been dead so long4 ,you don't mean ,joseph1 do you8 ,but after they had fully resuscitated him1 and the news was confirmed1 the tears begin the winding way down the cross roads of the wrinkles1 and the sunken lips of the old man quiver1 and he brings his bent fingers together as he says3 ,joseph is yet alive4 ,i will go and see him before ,i die4 ,it did not take the old man a great while to get ready1 ,i warrant you4 ,he put on the best clothes that the shepherd's wardrobe could afford4 ,he got into the wagon1 and though the aged are cautious and like to ride slow1 the wagon did not get along fast enough for this old man2 and when the wagon with the old man met ,joseph's chariot coming down to meet him1 and ,joseph got out of the chariot and got into the wagon and threw his arms around his father's neck1 it was an antithesis of ,,royalty ,,and ,,rusticity1 of simplicity and pomp1 of filial affection and paternal love1 which leaves us so much in doubt about whether we had better laugh or cry1 that we do both4 ,so ,jacob kept the resolution of the text3 ,i will go and see him before ,i die4 ,and if our friends the reporters would like to have an appropriate title for this sermon1 they might call it ,the ,old ,folks' ,visit4 ,what a strong and unfailing thing is parental attachment6 ,was it not almost time for ,jacob to forget ,joseph8 ,the hot suns of many summers had blazed on the heath2 the river ,nile had overflowed and receded1 overflowed and receded again and again2 the seed had been sown and the harvests reaped2 stars rose and set2 years of plenty and years of famine had passed on2 but the love of ,jacob for ,joseph in my text is overwhelmingly dramatic4 ,oh1 that is a cord that is not snapped1 though pulled on by many decades6 ,though when the little child expired the parents may not have been more than twenty-five years of age1 and now they are seventy-five1 yet the vision of the cradle1 and the childish face1 and the first utterances of the infantile lips are fresh to-day1 in spite of the passage of a half century4 ,joseph was as fresh in ,jacob's memory as ever1 though at seventeen years of age the boy had disappeared from the old homestead4 ,i found in our family record the story of an infant that had died fifty years before1 and ,i said to my parents3 ,what is this record1 and what does it mean8 ,their chief answer was a long deep sigh4 ,it was yet to them ,a ,,very ,,tender ,,sorrow4 ,what does that all mean8 ,why1 it means our children departed are ours yet1 and that cord of attachment reaching across the years will hold us until it brings us together in the palace1 as ,jacob and ,joseph were brought together4 ,that is one thing that makes old people die happy4 ,they realize it is reunion with those from whom they have long been separated4 ,i am often asked as pastor--and every pastor is asked the question--,will my children be ,,children ,,in ,,heaven1 and forever children8 ,well1 there was no doubt a great change in ,joseph from the time ,jacob lost him1 and the time when ,jacob found him--between the boy seventeen years of age and the man in midlife1 his forehead developed with a great business estate2 but ,jacob was glad to get back ,joseph anyhow1 and it did not make much difference to the old man whether the boy looked older1 or looked younger4 ,and it will be enough joy for that parent if he can get back that son1 that daughter1 at the gate of heaven1 whether the departed loved one shall come a cherub or in full-grown angelhood4 ,there must be a change wrought by that celestial climate and by those supernal years1 but it will only be from loveliness to more loveliness1 and from health to more radiant health4 ,o parent1 as you think of the darling panting and white in membranous croup1 ,i want you to know it will be gloriously bettered in that land where there has never been a death and where all the inhabitants will live on in the great future as long as ,god6 ,joseph was ,joseph notwithstanding the palace1 and your child will be your child notwithstanding all the raining splendors of everlasting noon4 ,what ,a ,,thrilling ,,visit was that of the old shepherd to the prime-minister ,joseph6 ,i see the old countryman seated in the palace looking around at the mirrors and the fountains and the carved pillars1 and oh6 how he wishes that ,rachel1 his wife1 was alive and she could have come there with him to see their son in his great house4 ,oh1 says the old man within himself1 ,i do wish ,rachel could be here to see all this6 ,i visited at the farmhouse of the father of ,millard ,fillmore when the son was ,president of the ,united ,states1 and the octogenerian farmer entertained me until eleven o'clock at night telling me what great things he saw in his son's house at ,washington1 and what ,daniel ,webster said to him1 and how grandly ,millard treated his father in the ,white ,house4 ,the old man's face was illumined with the story until almost the midnight4 ,he had just been visiting his son at the ,capitol4 ,and ,i suppose it was something of the same joy that thrilled the heart of the old shepherd as he stood in the palace of the prime-minister4 ,it is ,a ,,great ,,day ,,with ,,you when your old parents came to visit you4 ,your little children stand around with great wide open eyes1 wondering how anybody could be so old4 ,the parents cannot stay many days1 for they are a little restless1 and especially at nightfall1 because they sleep better in their own bed2 but while they tarry you somehow feel there is a benediction in every room in the house4 ,they are a little feeble1 and you make it as easy as you can for them1 and you realize they will probably not visit you very often--perhaps never again4 ,you go to their room after they have retired at night to see if the lights are properly put out1 for the old people understand candle and lamp better than the modern apparatus for illumination4 ,in the morning1 with real interest in their health1 you ask them how they rested last night4 ,joseph in the historical scene of the text did not think any more of his father than you do of your parents4 ,the probability is1 before they leave your house they half spoil your children with kindnesses4 ,grandfather and grandmother are more lenient and indulgent to your children than they ever were with you4 ,and what wonders of revelation in the bombazine pocket of the one and the sleeve of the other6 ,blessed is that home where ,christian parents come to visit4 ,whatever may have been the style of the architecture when they come1 it is a palace before they leave4 ,if they visit you fifty times1 the two most memorable visits will be the first and the last4 ,those two pictures will hang in the hall of your memory while memory lasts1 and you will remember just how they looked1 and where they sat1 and what they said1 and at what figure of the carpet1 and at what door-sill they parted with you1 giving you the final good-bye4 ,do not be embarrassed if your father come to town and he have the manners of the shepherd1 and if your mother come to town and there be in her hat no sign of costly millinery4 ,the wife of ,emperor ,theodosius said a wise thing when she said3 ,husband1 remember what you lately were1 and remember what you are1 and be thankful4 ,by this time you all notice what ,,kindly ,,provision ,joseph made for his father ,jacob4 ,joseph did not say3 ,i can't have the old man around this place4 ,how clumsy he would look climbing up these marble stairs1 and walking over these mosaics6 ,then1 he would be putting his hands upon some of these frescoes4 ,people would wonder where that old greenhorn came from4 ,he would shock all the ,egyptian court with his manners at table4 ,besides that1 he might get sick on my hands1 and he might be querulous1 and he might talk to me as though ,i were only a boy1 when ,i am the second man in all the realm4 ,of course1 he must not suffer1 and if there is famine in his country--and ,i hear there is--,i will send him some provisions2 but ,i can't take a man from ,padan-aram and introduce him into this polite ,egyptian court4 ,what a nuisance it is to have ,,poor ,,relations6 ,joseph did not say that1 but he rushed out to meet his father with perfect abandon of affection1 and brought him up to the palace1 and introduced him to the ,emperor1 and provided for all the rest of the father's days1 and nothing was too good for the old man while living2 and when he was dead ,joseph1 with military escort1 took his father's remains to the family cemetery at ,machpelah and put them down beside ,rachel1 ,joseph's mother4 ,would ,god all children were as kind to their parents6 ,if the father have large property1 and he be wise enough to keep it in his own name1 he will be respected by the heirs2 but how often it is when the son finds the father in famine1 as ,joseph found ,jacob in famine1 the young people make it very hard for the old man4 ,they are so surprised he eats with a knife instead of a fork4 ,they are chagrined at his antediluvian habits4 ,they are provoked because he cannot hear as well as he used to1 and when he asks it over again1 and the son has to repeat it1 he bawls in the old man's ear3 ,i hope you hear that6 ,how long he must wear the old coat or the old hat before they get him a new one6 ,how chagrined they are at his independence of the ,english grammar6 ,how long he hangs on6 ,seventy years and not gone yet6 ,seventy-five years and not gone yet6 ,eighty years and not gone yet6 ,will he ever go8 ,they think it of no use to have a doctor in his last sickness1 and go up to the drugstore and get a dose of something that makes him worse1 and economize on a coffin1 and beat the undertaker down to the last point1 giving a note for the reduced amount which they never pay6 ,i have officiated at obsequies of aged people where the family have been so inordinately resigned to the ,providence that ,i felt like taking my text from ,proverbs3 ,the eye that mocketh at its father1 and refuseth to obey its mother1 the ravens of the valley shall pick it out1 and the young eagles shall eat it4 ,in other words1 such an ingrate ought to have a flock of crows for pall-bearers6 ,i congratulate you if you have the honor of providing for aged parents4 ,the blessing of the ,lord ,god of ,joseph and ,jacob will be on you4 ,i rejoice to remember that though my father lived in a plain house the most of his days1 he died in a mansion provided by the filial piety of a son who had achieved a fortune4 ,there the octogenarian sat1 and the servants waited on him1 and there were plenty of horses and plenty of carriages to convey him1 and a bower in which to sit on long summer afternoons1 dreaming over the past1 and there was not a room in the house where he was not welcome1 and there were musical instruments of all sorts to regale him2 and when life had passed1 the neighbors came out and expressed all honor possible1 and carried him to the village ,machpelah and put him down beside the ,rachel with whom he had lived more than half a century4 ,,share ,,your ,,successes with the old people4 ,the probability is1 that the principles they inculcated achieved your fortune4 ,give them a ,christian percentage of kindly consideration4 ,let ,joseph divide with ,jacob the pasture fields of ,goshen and the glories of the ,egyptian court4 ,and here ,i would like to sing the praises of the sisterhood who remained unmarried that they might administer to aged parents4 ,the brutal world calls these ,,self-,,sacrificing ,,ones by ungallant names1 and says they are peculiar or angular2 but if you had had as many annoyances as they have had1 ,xantippe would have been an angel compared with you4 ,it is easier to take care of five rollicking1 romping children than of one childish old man4 ,among the best women of ,brooklyn and of yonder transpontine city are those who allowed the bloom of life to pass away while they were caring for their parents4 ,while other maidens were sound asleep1 they were soaking the old man's feet or tucking up the covers around the invalid mother4 ,while other maidens were in the cotillon1 they were dancing attendance upon rheumatism and spreading plasters for the lame back of the septuagenarian1 and heating catnip tea for insomnia4 ,in almost every circle of our kindred there has been some ,,queen ,,of ,,self-,,sacrifice to whom jeweled hand after jeweled hand was offered in marriage1 but who stayed on the old place because of the sense of filial obligation until the health was gone and the attractiveness of personal presence had vanished4 ,brutal society may call such a one by a nickname4 ,god calls her daughter1 and ,heaven calls her saint1 and ,i call her domestic martyr4 ,a half dozen ordinary women have not as much nobility as could be found in the smallest joint of the little finger of her left hand4 ,although the world has stood six thousand years1 this is the first apotheosis of maidenhood1 although in the long line of those who have declined marriage that they might be qualified for some especial mission are the names of ,anna ,ross1 and ,margaret ,breckinridge1 and ,mary ,shelton1 and ,anna ,etheridge1 and ,georgiana ,willetts1 the angels of the battlefields of ,fair ,oaks1 and ,lookout ,mountain1 and ,chancellorsville1 and ,cooper ,shop ,hospital3 and though single life has been honored by the fact that the three grandest men of the ,bible--,john and ,paul and ,christ--were ,,celibates4 ,let the ungrateful world sneer at the maiden aunt1 but ,god has a throne burnished for her arrival1 and on one side of that throne in heaven there is a vase containing two jewels1 the one brighter than the ,kohinoor of ,london ,tower1 and the other larger than any diamond ever found in the districts of ,golconda--the one jewel by the lapidary of the palace cut with the words3 ,inasmuch as ye did it to father2 the other jewel by the lapidary of the palace cut with the words3 ,inasmuch as ye did it to mother4 ,over the ,hills to the ,poorhouse is the exquisite ballad of ,will ,carleton1 who found an old woman who had been turned off by her prospered sons2 but ,i thank ,god ,i may find in my text ,over the hills to the palace4 ,as if to disgust us with unfilial conduct1 the ,bible presents us the story of ,micah1 who stole the eleven hundred shekels from his mother1 and the story of ,absalom1 who tried to dethrone his father4 ,but all history is beautiful with stories of filial fidelity4 ,epaminondas1 the warrior1 found his chief delight in reciting to his parents his victories4 ,there goes ,a,eneas from burning ,troy1 on his shoulders ,anchises1 his father4 ,the ,athenians punished with death any unfilial conduct4 ,there goes beautiful ,ruth escorting venerable ,naomi across the desert amid the howling of the wolves and the barking of the jackals4 ,john ,lawrence burned at the stake in ,colchester1 was cheered in the flames by his children1 who said3 ,o ,god1 strengthen thy servant and keep thy promise6 ,and ,christ in the hour of excruciation provided for ,his old mother4 ,jacob kept his resolution1 ,i will go and see him before ,i die1 and a little while after we find them walking the tessellated floor of the palace1 ,jacob and ,joseph1 the prime-minister proud of the shepherd4 ,i may say in regard to the most of you that your parents have probably visited you for the last time1 or will soon pay you such a visit1 and ,i have wondered if they will ever visit you ,,in ,,the ,,king',s ,,palace4 ,oh1 you say1 ,i am in the pit of sin6 ,joseph was in the pit4 ,oh1 you say1 ,i am in the prison of mine iniquity6 ,joseph was once in prison4 ,oh1 you say1 ,i didn't have a fair chance2 ,i was denied maternal kindness6 ,joseph was denied maternal attendance4 ,oh1 you say1 ,i am far away from the land of my nativity6 ,joseph was far from home4 ,oh1 you say1 ,i have been betrayed and exasperated6 ,did not ,joseph's brethren sell him to a passing ,ishmaelitish caravan8 ,yet ,god brought him to that emblazoned residence2 and if you will trust ,his grace in ,jesus ,christ you1 too1 will be empalaced4 ,oh1 what a day that will be when the old folks come from an adjoining mansion in heaven1 and find you amid the alabaster pillars of the throne-room and living with the king6 ,they are coming up the steps now1 and the epauletted guard of the palace rushes in and says3 ,your father's coming1 your mother's coming6 ,and when under the arches of precious stones and on the pavement of porphyry you greet each other1 the scene will eclipse the meeting on the ,goshen highway1 when ,joseph and ,jacob fell on each other's neck and wept a good while4 ,but oh1 how changed the old folks will be6 ,their cheek smoothed into the flesh of a little child4 ,their stooped posture lifted into immortal symmetry4 ,their foot now so feeble1 then with the sprightliness of a bounding roe as they shall say to you3 ,a spirit passed this way from earth and told us that you were wayward and dissipated after we left the world2 but you have repented1 our prayer has been answered1 and you are here2 and as we used to visit you on earth before we died1 now we visit you in your new home after our ascension4 ,and father will say1 ,mother1 don't you see ,joseph is yet alive8 and mother will say1 ,yes1 father1 ,joseph is yet alive4 ,and then they will talk over their earthly anxieties in regard to you1 and the midnight supplications in your behalf1 and they will recite to each other the old ,scripture passage with which they used to cheer their staggering faith3 ,i will be a ,god to thee and thy seed after thee4 ,oh1 the palace1 the palace1 the palace6 ,that is what ,richard ,baxter called ,the ,saints' ,everlasting ,rest4 ,that is what ,john ,bunyan called the ,celestial ,city4 ,that is ,young's ,night ,thoughts turned into morning exultations4 ,that is ,gray's ,elegy in a ,churchyard turned to resurrection spectacle4 ,that is the ,cotter's ,saturday ,night exchanged for the ,cotter's ,sabbath morning4 ,that is the shepherd of ,salisbury ,plain amid the flocks on the hills of heaven4 ,that is the famine-struck ,padan-aram turned into the rich pasture fields of ,goshen4 ,that is ,jacob visiting ,joseph at the emerald castle4 ,,the ,,domestic ,,circle4 ,go home to thy friends1 and tell them how great things the ,lord hath done for thee4--,,mark #e3ai4 ,there are a great many people longing for some grand sphere in which to serve ,god4 ,they admire ,luther at the ,diet of ,worms1 and only wish that they had some such great opportunity in which to display their ,christian prowess4 ,they admire ,paul making ,felix tremble1 and they only wish that they had some such grand occasion in which to preach righteousness1 temperance1 and judgment to come2 all they want is only an opportunity to exhibit their ,christian heroism4 ,now the evangelist comes to us1 and he practically says3 ,i will show you a place where you can exhibit all that is grand1 and beautiful1 and glorious in ,christian character1 and that is the domestic circle4 ,,every ,,man',s ,,opportunity4 ,if one is not faithful in an insignificant sphere he will not be faithful in a resounding sphere4 ,if ,peter will not help the cripple at the gate of the temple1 he will never be able to preach three thousand souls into the kingdom at the ,pentecost4 ,if ,paul will not take pains to instruct in the way of salvation the jailor of the ,philippian dungeon1 he will never make ,felix tremble4 ,he who is not faithful in a skirmish would not be faithful in an ,armageddon4 ,the fact is we are all placed in just the position in which we can most grandly serve ,god2 and we ought not to be chiefly thoughtful about some sphere of usefulness which we may after a while gain1 but the all-absorbing question with you and with me ought to be3 ,lord1 what wilt thou have me now and here to do8 ,,what ,a ,,home ,,is4 ,there is one word in my text around which the most of our thoughts will this morning revolve4 ,that word is ,home4 ,ask ten different men the meaning of that word1 and they will give you ten different definitions4 ,to one it means love at the hearth1 it means plenty at the table1 industry at the workstand1 intelligence at the books1 devotion at the altar4 ,to him it means a greeting at the door and a smile at the chair4 ,peace hovering like wings4 ,joy clapping its hands with laughter4 ,life a tranquil lake4 ,pillowed on the ripples sleep the shadows4 ,ask another man what home is1 and he will tell you it is want1 looking out of a cheerless firegrate1 kneading hunger in an empty bread tray4 ,the damp air shivering with curses4 ,no ,bible on the shelf4 ,children robbers and murderers in embryo4 ,obscene songs their lullaby4 ,every face a picture of ruin4 ,want in the background and sin staring from the front4 ,no ,sabbath wave rolling over that door-sill4 ,vestibule of the pit4 ,shadow of infernal walls4 ,furnace for forging everlasting chains4 ,faggots for an unending funeral pile4 ,awful word6 ,it is spelled with curses1 it weeps with ruin1 it chokes with woe1 it sweats with the death agony of despair4 ,the word ,home in the one case means everything bright4 ,the word ,home in the other case means everything terrific4 ,i shall speak to you this morning of home as a test of character1 home as a refuge1 home as a political safeguard1 home as a school1 and home as a type of heaven4 ,and in the first place ,i remark1 that home is a powerful test of character4 ,the disposition in public may be in gay costume1 while in private it is in dishabille4 ,as play actors may appear in one way on the stage1 and may appear in another way behind the scenes1 so private character may be very different from public character4 ,private character is often public character turned wrong side out4 ,a man may receive you into his parlor as though he were a distillation of smiles1 and yet his heart may be a swamp of nettles4 ,there are business men who all day long are mild1 and courteous1 and genial1 and good-natured in commercial life1 damming back their irritability1 and their petulance1 and their discontent2 but at nightfall the dam breaks1 and scolding pours forth in floods and freshets4 ,,home ,,manners4 ,reputation is only the shadow of character1 and a very small house sometimes will cast a very long shadow4 ,the lips may seem to drop with myrrh and cassia1 and the disposition to be as bright and warm as a sheaf of sunbeams1 and yet they may only be a magnificent show window to a wretched stock of goods4 ,there is many a man who is affable in public life and amid commercial spheres who1 in a cowardly way1 takes his anger and his petulance home1 and drops them on the domestic circle4 ,the reason men do not display their bad temper in public is because they do not want to be knocked down4 ,there are men who hide their petulance and their irritability just for the same reason that they do not let their notes go to protest4 ,it does not pay4 ,or for the same reason that they do not want a man in their stock company to sell his stock at less than the right price1 lest it depreciate the value4 ,as at some time the wind rises1 so after a sunshiny day there may be a tempestuous night4 ,there are people who in public act the philanthropist1 who at home act the ,nero1 with respect to their slippers and their gown4 ,,audubon',s ,,greatness4 ,audubon1 the great ornithologist1 with gun and pencil1 went through the forests of ,america to bring down and to sketch the beautiful birds1 and after years of toil and exposure completed his manuscript1 and put it in a trunk in ,philadelphia for a few days of recreation and rest1 and came back and found that the rats had utterly destroyed the manuscript2 but without any discomposure and without any fret or bad temper1 he again picked up his gun and pencil1 and visited again all the great forests of ,america1 and reproduced his immortal work4 ,and yet there are people with the ten thousandth part of that loss who are utterly unreconcilable1 who1 at the loss of a pencil or an article of raiment will blow as long and sharp as a northeast storm4 ,now1 that man who is affable in public and who is irritable in private is making a fraudulent overissue of stock1 and he is as bad as a bank that might have four or five hundred thousand dollars of bills in circulation with no specie in the vault4 ,let us learn to show piety at home4 ,if we have it not there1 we have it not anywhere4 ,if we have not genuine grace in the family circle1 all our outward and public plausibility merely springs from a fear of the world or from the slimy1 putrid pool of our own selfishness4 ,i tell you the home is a mighty test of character6 ,what you are at home you are everywhere1 whether you demonstrate it or not4 ,,home ,a ,,refuge4 ,again1 ,i remark that home is a refuge4 ,life is the ,united ,states army on the national road to ,mexico1 a long march1 with ever and anon a skirmish and a battle4 ,at eventide we pitch our tent and stack the arms1 we hang up the war cap and lay our head on the knapsack1 we sleep until the morning bugle calls us to marching and action4 ,how pleasant it is to rehearse the victories and the surprises1 and the attacks of the day1 seated by the still camp-fire of the home circle6 ,yea1 life is a stormy sea4 ,with shivered masts1 and torn sails1 and hulk aleak1 we put in at the harbor of home4 ,blessed harbor6 ,there we go for repairs in the dry dock of quiet life4 ,the candle in the window is to the toiling man the lighthouse guiding him into port4 ,children go forth to meet their fathers as pilots at the ,narrows take the hand of ships4 ,the door-sill of the home is the wharf where heavy life is unladen4 ,there is the place where we may talk of what we have done without being charged with self adulation4 ,there is the place where we may lounge without being thought ungraceful4 ,there is the place where we may express affection without being thought silly4 ,there is the place where we may forget our annoyances1 and exasperations1 and troubles4 ,forlorn earth pilgrim6 no home8 ,then die4 ,that is better4 ,the grave is brighter1 and grander1 and more glorious than this world with no tent for marchings1 with no harbor from the storm1 with no place of rest from this scene of greed1 and gouge1 and loss1 and gain4 ,god pity the man or the woman who has no home6 ,a ,,political ,,safeguard4 ,further1 ,i remark that home is a political safeguard4 ,the safety of the ,state must be built on the safety of the home4 ,why cannot ,france come to a placid republic8 ,ever and anon there is a threat of national capsize4 ,france as a nation has not the right kind of a ,christian home4 ,the ,christian hearthstone is the only corner-stone for a republic4 ,the virtues cultured in the family circle are an absolute necessity for the ,state4 ,if there be not enough moral principle to make the family adhere1 there will not be enough political principle to make the ,state adhere4 ,no home means the ,goths and ,vandals1 means the ,nomads of ,asia1 means the ,numideans of ,africa1 changing from place to place1 according as the pasture happens to change4 ,confounded be all those ,babels of iniquity which would overtower and destroy the home4 ,the same storm that upsets the ship in which the family sails will sink the frigate of the constitution4 ,jails and penitentiaries and armies and navies are not our best defence4 ,the door of the home is the best fortress4 ,household utensils are the best artillery1 and the chimneys of our dwelling houses are the grandest monuments of safety and triumph4 ,no home2 no republic4 ,,as ,a ,,school4 ,further1 ,i remark1 that home is a school4 ,old ground must be turned up with subsoil plough1 and it must be harrowed and re-harrowed1 and then the crop will not be as large as that of the new ground with less culture4 ,now youth and childhood are new ground1 and all the influences thrown over their heart and life will come up in after life luxuriantly4 ,every time you have given a smile of approbation1 all the good cheer of your life will come up again in the geniality of your children4 ,and every ebullition of anger and every uncontrollable display of indignation will be fuel to their disposition twenty1 or thirty1 or forty years from now--fuel for a bad fire a quarter of a century from this4 ,you praise the intelligence of your child too much sometimes when you think he is not aware of it1 and you will see the result of it before ten years of age in his annoying affectations4 ,you praise his beauty1 supposing he is not large enough to understand what you say1 and you will find him standing on a high chair before a flattering mirror4 ,words and deeds and example are the seed of character1 and children are very apt to be the second edition of their parents4 ,abraham begat ,isaac1 so virtue is apt to go down in the ancestral line2 but ,herod begat ,archelaus1 so iniquity is transmitted4 ,what vast responsibility comes upon parents in view of this subject6 ,oh1 make your home the brightest place on earth1 if you would charm your children to the high path of virtue1 and rectitude1 and religion6 ,do not always turn the blinds the wrong way4 ,let the light which puts gold on the gentian and spots the pansy pour into your dwellings4 ,do not expect the little feet to keep step to a dead march4 ,do not cover up your walls with such pictures as ,west's ,death on a ,pale ,horse1 or ,tintoretto's ,massacre of the ,innocents4 ,rather cover them1 if you have pictures1 with ,the ,hawking ,party1 and ,the ,mill by the ,mountain ,stream1 and ,the ,fox ,hunt1 and ,the ,children ,amid ,flowers1 and ,the ,harvest ,scene1 and ,the ,saturday ,night ,marketing4 ,,cheerful ,,homes4 ,get you no hint of cheerfulness from grasshopper's leap1 and lamb's frisk1 and quail's whistle1 and garrulous streamlet1 which from the rock at the mountain-top clear down to the meadow ferns under the shadow of the steep1 comes looking for the steepest place to leap off at1 and talking just to hear itself talk8 ,if all the skies hurtled with tempest and everlasting storm wandered over the sea1 and every mountain stream went raving mad1 frothing at the mouth with mud foam1 and there were nothing but simooms blowing among the hills1 and there were neither lark's carol nor humming bird's trill1 nor waterfall's dash1 but only a bear's bark1 and panther's scream1 and wolf's howl1 then you might well gather into your homes only the shadows4 ,but when ,god has strewn the earth and the heavens with beauty and with gladness1 let us take into our home circle all innocent hilarity1 all brightness1 and all good cheer4 ,a dark home makes bad boys and bad girls in preparation for bad men and bad women4 ,above all1 my friends1 take into your homes ,christian principle4 ,can it be that in any of the comfortable homes of my congregation the voice of prayer is never lifted8 ,what6 ,no supplication at night for protection8 ,what6 ,no thanksgiving in the morning for care8 ,how1 my brother1 my sister1 will you answer ,god in the ,day of ,judgment1 with reference to your children8 ,it is a plain question and therefore ,i ask it4 ,in the tenth chapter of ,jeremiah ,god says ,he will pour out ,his fury upon the families that call not upon ,his name4 ,o parents6 when you are dead and gone1 and the moss is covering the inscription of the tombstones will your children look back and think of father and mother at family prayer8 ,will they take the old family ,bible and open it and see the mark of tears of contrition and tears of consoling promise wept by eyes long before gone out into darkness8 ,,children',s ,,curses4 ,oh1 if you do not inculcate ,christian principle in the hearts of your children1 and you do not warn them against evil1 and you do not invite them to holiness and to ,god1 and they wander on into dissipation and into infidelity1 and at last make shipwreck of their immortal soul1 on their deathbed and in their ,day of ,judgment they will curse you6 ,seated by the register or the stove1 what if on the wall should come out the history of your children8 ,what a history--the mortal and immortal life of your loved ones6 ,every parent is writing the history of his child4 ,he is writing it1 composing it into a song1 or turning it into a groan4 ,my mind runs back to one of the best of early homes4 ,prayer1 like a roof1 over it4 ,peace1 like an atmosphere1 in it4 ,parents1 personifications of faith in trial and comfort in darkness4 ,the two pillars of that earthly home long ago crumbled to dust4 ,but shall ,i ever forget that early home8 ,yes1 when the flower forgets the sun that warms it4 ,yes1 when the mariner forgets the star that guided him4 ,yes1 when love has gone out on the heart's altar and memory has emptied its urn into forgetfulness4 ,then1 the home of my childhood1 ,i will forget thee6 ,the family altar of a father's importunity and a mother's tenderness1 the voices of affection1 the funerals of our dead father and mother with interlocked arms like intertwining branches of trees making a perpetual arbor of love1 and peace1 and kindness--then ,i will forget them--then and only then4 ,you know1 my brother1 that a hundred times you have been kept out of sin by the memory of such a scene as ,i have been describing4 ,you have often had raging temptations1 but you know what has held you with supernatural grasp4 ,i tell you a man who has had such a good home as that never gets over it1 and a man who has had a bad early home never gets over it4 ,again1 ,i remark1 that home is a type of heaven4 ,to bring us to that home ,christ left ,his home4 ,far up and far back in the history of heaven there came a period when its most illustrious citizen was about to absent ,himself4 ,he was not going to sail from beach to beach2 we have often done that4 ,he was not going to put out from one hemisphere to another hemisphere2 many of us have done that4 ,but he was to sail from world to world1 the spaces unexplored and the immensities untraveled4 ,no world had ever hailed heaven1 and so far as we know heaven had never hailed any other world4 ,i think that the windows and the balconies were thronged1 and that the pearline beach was crowded with those who had come to see ,him sail out the harbor of light into the oceans beyond4 ,,the ,,exile4 ,out1 and out1 and out1 and on1 and on1 and on1 and down1 and down1 and down ,he sped1 until one night1 with only one to greet ,him1 ,he arrived4 ,his disembarkation so unpretending1 so quiet1 that it was not known on earth until the excitement in the cloud gave intimation that something grand and glorious had happened4 ,who comes there8 ,from what port did ,he sail8 ,why was this the place of ,his destination8 ,i question the shepherds1 ,i question the camel drivers1 ,i question the angels4 ,i have found out4 ,he was an exile4 ,but the world has had plenty of exiles--,abraham an exile from ,ur of the ,chaldees2 ,john an exile from ,ephesus2 ,kosciusko an exile from ,poland2 ,mazzini an exile from ,rome2 ,emmett an exile from ,ireland2 ,victor ,hugo an exile from ,france2 ,kossuth an exile from ,hungary4 ,but this one of whom ,i speak to-day had such resounding farewell and came into such chilling reception--for not even an hostler came out with his lantern to help ,him in--that ,he is more to be celebrated than any other expatriated one of earth or heaven4 ,,homesickness4 ,it is ninety-five million miles from here to the sun1 and all astronomers agree in saying that our solar system is only one of the small wheels of the great machinery of the universe1 turning round some one great centre1 the centre so far distant it is beyond all imagination and calculation2 and if1 as some think1 that great centre in the distance is heaven1 ,christ came far from home when ,he came here4 ,have you ever thought of the homesickness of ,christ8 ,some of you know what homesickness is1 when you have been only a few weeks absent from the domestic circle4 ,christ was thirty-three years away from home4 ,some of you feel homesickness when you are a hundred or a thousand miles away from the domestic circle4 ,christ was more millions of miles away from home than you could calculate if all your life you did nothing but calculate4 ,you know what it is to be homesick even amid pleasurable surroundings2 but ,christ slept in huts1 and ,he was athirst1 and ,he was ahungered1 and ,he was on the way from being born in another man's barn to being buried in another man's grave4 ,i have read how the ,swiss1 when they are far away from their native country1 at the sound of their national air get so homesick that they fall into melancholy1 and sometimes they die under the homesickness4 ,but oh6 the homesickness of ,christ6 ,poverty homesickness for celestial riches6 ,persecution homesick for hosanna6 ,weariness homesick for rest6 ,homesick for angelic and archangelic companionship4 ,homesick to go out of the night1 and the storm1 and the world's execration1 and all that homesickness suffered to get us home6 ,,the ,,home-,,gathering4 ,at our best estate we are only pilgrims and strangers here4 ,heaven is our home4 ,death will never knock at the door of that mansion1 and in all that country there is not a single grave4 ,how glad parents are in holiday times to gather their children home again6 ,but ,i have noticed that there is almost always a son or a daughter absent--absent from home1 perhaps absent from the country1 perhaps absent from the world4 ,oh1 how glad our ,heavenly ,father will be when ,he gets all ,his children home with ,him in heaven6 ,and how delightful it will be for brothers and sisters to meet after long separation6 ,once they parted at the door of the tomb2 now they meet at the door of immortality4 ,once they saw only through a glass darkly2 now it is face to face2 corruption1 incorruption2 mortality1 immortality4 ,where are now all their sins and sorrows and troubles8 ,overwhelmed in the ,red ,sea of ,death while they passed through dry shod4 ,gates of pearl1 capstones of amethyst1 thrones of dominion1 do not stir my soul so much as the thought of home4 ,once there let earthly sorrows howl like storms and roll like seas4 ,home6 ,let thrones rot and empires wither6 ,home6 ,let the world die in earthquake struggle1 and be buried amid procession of planets and dirge of spheres4 ,home6 ,let everlasting ages roll with irresistible sweep4 ,home6 ,no sorrow1 no crying1 no tears1 no death4 ,but home1 sweet home1 home1 beautiful home1 everlasting home1 home with each other1 home with ,god4 ,a ,,dream4 ,one night lying on my lounge1 when very tired1 my children all around about me in full romp1 and hilarity and laughter--on the lounge1 half awake and half asleep1 ,i dreamed this dream3 ,i was in a far country4 ,it was not ,persia1 although more than ,oriental luxuriance crowned the cities4 ,it was not the tropics1 although more than tropical fruitfulness filled the gardens4 ,it was not ,italy1 although more than ,italian softness filled the air4 ,and ,i wandered around looking for thorns and nettles1 but ,i found that none of them grew there1 and ,i saw the sun rise1 and ,i watched to see it set1 but it sank not4 ,and ,i saw the people in holiday attire1 and ,i said3 ,when will they put off this and put on workmen's garb1 and again delve in the mine or swelter at the forge8 but they never put off the holiday attire4 ,and ,i wandered in the suburbs of the city to find the place where the dead sleep1 and ,i looked all along the line of the beautiful hills1 the place where the dead might most blissfully sleep1 and ,i saw towers and castles1 but not a mausoleum or a monument or a white slab could ,i see4 ,and ,i went into the chapel of the great town1 and ,i said3 ,where do the poor worship1 and where are the hard benches on which they sit8 ,and the answer was made me3 ,,we ,,have ,,no ,,poor in this country4 ,and then ,i wandered out to find the hovels of the destitute1 and ,i found mansions of amber and ivory and gold2 but not a tear could ,i see1 not a sigh could ,i hear1 and ,i was bewildered1 and ,i sat down under the branches of a great tree1 and ,i said3 ,where am ,i8 ,and whence comes all this scene8 ,and then out from among the leaves1 and up the flowery paths1 and across the bright streams there came a beautiful group1 thronging all about me1 and as ,i saw them come ,i thought ,i knew their step1 and as they shouted ,i thought ,i knew their voices2 but then they were so gloriously arrayed in apparel such as ,i had never before witnessed that ,i bowed as stranger to stranger4 ,but when again they clapped their hands and shouted ,welcome1 welcome6 the mystery all vanished1 and ,i found that time had gone and eternity had come1 and we were all together again in our new home in heaven4 ,and ,i looked around1 and ,i said2 ,are we all here8 and the voices of many generations responded ,all here6 ,and while tears of gladness were raining down our cheeks1 and the branches of the ,lebanon cedars were clapping their hands1 and the towers of the great city were chiming their welcome1 we all together began to leap and shout and sing3 ,home1 home1 home1 home6 99 99 99 99 99 ---------------------------------------- ------------------- ,typographical errors corrected in text3 ,page #fe3 'it' replaced with 'if' in the sentence and if you should strike him444 ,page #ajc3 seciety replaced with society ,page #aic3 ,christion replaced with ,christian ,page #bji3 beqeath replaced with bequeath ,page #bji3 wordliness replaced for worldliness ,page #bgf3 couse replaced with course ---------------------------------------- ------------------- 99 99 99 99 99