,frontispiece3 ,forbes ,robinson ,,letters ,,to ,,his ,,friends ,,by ,,forbes ,,robinson ,,late ,,fellow ,,of ,,christ',s ,,college1 ,,cambridge ,,and ,,examining ,,chaplain ,,to ,,the ,,bishop ,,of ,,southwell ,,edited ,,with ,,an ,,introductory ,,notice ,,by ,,his ,,brother ,,charles ,,second ,,edition ,,printed ,,for ,,private ,,circulation ,,by ,,spottiswoode ,,co4 ,,ltd41 ,,london4 #aijd ,,note ,this volume has been printed for private circulation at the request of many of ,forbes ,robinson's personal friends4 ,the first edition having been exhausted1 a second has been prepared1 in which are included six additional letters 7cf4 pp4 #aea1 #aed1 #afd1 #aff1 #afg1 #ahb74 ,copies of this volume will be supplied 7price #bs4 #f;d4 post free7 to all who desire to obtain them1 on application to the ,rev4 ,canon ,charles ,h4 ,robinson1 ,hill ,brow1 ,woking4 ,the volume of ,college and ,ordination ,addresses which will be published by ,longmans in about two months' time can be ordered through any bookseller4 ,october #aijd4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the book contains a number of short ,greek phrases1 all of which have been transliterated according to ,project ,gutenberg's ,greek ,how-,to4 ,a more detailed transliteration note follows each paragraph or article where the ,greek phrase occurs4 ,transcriber's note3 ,page numbers in this book are indicated by numbers enclosed in curly braces1 e4g4 #ii4 ,they have been located where page breaks occurred in the original book1 in accordance with ,project ,gutenberg's ,,faq-,v-#ii4 ,for its ,index1 a page number has been placed only at the start of that section4 ,in the ,,html version of this book1 page numbers are placed in the left margin4 ,,contents ,,introductory ,,sketch ,,chapter4 ,,page ,i4 ,,schooldays 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #a ,,ii4 ,,life ,,as ,,an ,,undergraduate ,,at ,,cambridge 4 4 4 4 #aj ,,iii4 ,,work ,,at ,,cambridge 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #ba ,,iv4 ,,the ,,last ,,few ,,months 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #cb ,v4 ,,two ,,appreciations 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #cf ,,letters ,,to ,,his ,,friends 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #ed ,,appendix 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #aic ,,index 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 #aii ,,illustrations ,forbes ,robinson 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 4 ,frontispiece ,forbes ,robinson 7#ahhj7 ,forbes ,robinson 7#ahhg7 #a ,,introductory ,,sketch ,,chapter ,i ,,schooldays ,forbes ,robinson was born on ,november #ac1 #ahfg1 in the vicarage of ,keynsham1 a village in ,somerset lying between ,bristol and ,bath4 ,he was the eleventh child in a family of thirteen1 of whom eight were sons and five daughters4 ,his parents were both from the north of ,ireland1 and his ,christian name had been his mother's surname4 ,the motto attached to his father's family crest was ',non nobis solum sed toti mundo nati4' ,before he was three years old his father moved to ,liverpool and became incumbent of ,st4 ,augustine's1 ,everton4 ,he died before ,forbes was thirteen1 but the memory of his holy life remained as an abiding influence4 ,thus he writes of him in #aijc3 ',the old memories form a kind of sacred history urging me onwards and upwards4 ,i like to feel that ,i reap the prayers and thanksgivings of my father1 that ,god blesses the son of such a father4 ,the same work1 the same ,god1 the same promises1 the same hope1 the same sure and certain reward4 ,i thank ,god and take courage4' #b ,as a boy he was never robust and might even be regarded as delicate4 ,after attending one or two private schools he was entered1 at the age of twelve1 at ,liverpool ,college1 where five of his brothers had been4 ,when his father died in ,february #ahha1 the house in ,liverpool was given up and ,forbes was sent to ,rossall4 ,he continued at ,rossall till he entered ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge1 in #ahhg4 ,the photograph which is inserted on p4 #d was taken just before he went to ,rossall4 ,he was then a shy retiring boy1 fonder of reading than of athletic exercise4 ,one who was in the same house with him at ,rossall1 and who is now vicar of a parish in ,lancashire1 writes3 ',his life at ,rossall was not an outwardly eventful one4 ,not being athletic1 he lived rather apart from and above the rest of us in a world of books4 ,the walls of his study used to be almost covered with extracts1 largely1 ,i think1 from the poets1 copied on to scraps of paper and pinned up all round1 partly to be learnt by heart and partly1 ,i think1 for companionship4 ,he was much older than the rest of us whose years were the same as his4 ,his school life was a time of retirement and preparation for the wider life among men at ,cambridge4 ,though my memory of him as a quiet studious member of the house1 more often alone than not1 and quite happy to be alone so long as his books were near him1 is very distinct1 ,i can recall almost nothing of the nature of incident or about which one can write4' ,the present headmaster of ,marlborough1 who was #c also a contemporary at ,rossall1 writes in a letter to the editor of this memoir3 ',your brother was a great recluse at ,rossall1 and ,i much doubt whether you would get any great amount of information about him from ,rossallians4 ,i knew him because we were both interested in reading1 and ,i owed a good deal to his influence4 4 4 4 ,you will find1 ,i believe1 that his ,cambridge days show him in a far clearer light than his school days4 ,i know that when ,i saw him at ,cambridge ,i realised with pleasure that he was a welcomed visitor in the rooms of very various types of undergraduates1 whereas his circle at school had been very limited1 and most boys no doubt regarded him as quite out of it4 ,this is of course to some extent the fault of the athletic standards of our schools1 but ,i also think that he himself developed a great deal socially at ,cambridge4' ,a sketch of ,forbes1 by ,dr4 ,james1 written for ',the ,rossallian1' will be found at the close of this chapter4 ,dr4 ,tancock1 who succeeded ,dr4 ,james as headmaster of ,rossall a year before ,forbes left1 writes3 ',when ,i was appointed to ,rossall in #ahhf1 ,i found him a member of the upper sixth form4 4 4 4 ,he always gave me the impression of an earnest-minded1 hard-working boy1 with a deep sense of duty4 ,it was rather suggested to my mind sometimes1 possibly erroneously1 that as a younger boy he had felt himself misunderstood1 and a certain reserve was the consequence1 not perhaps unnaturally4 ,he was already much interested in theological work4 4 4 4 ,it #d has been a great pleasure to me in later years to hear of his excellent work at ,christ's and the strong influence he exerted over undergraduates4 ,it was quite the natural result of the qualities ,i saw in him at school1 provided once his reserve could be broken4' ,illustration3 ,forbes ,robinson 7#ahhj7 ,though of ,irish descent he only once visited ,ireland4 ,this was during his summer holidays in #ahhd1 when he travelled round a good part of the north and west coasts4 ,the only adventure of special interest was his unintended voyage across the ,bay of ,donegal1 which was nearly attended with fatal consequences4 ,he and his brother1 the editor of this memoir1 started in a small open sailing boat from the harbour of ,killybegs1 intending to return within a few minutes2 but no sooner had they got outside the harbour than they were caught in a squall1 which rapidly developed into a gale1 and made it impossible to turn the boat or head it for the shore1 owing to the immediate risk of swamping4 ,the only means of securing momentary safety was to head the boat out into the ,atlantic1 but as the nearest land in this direction was the coast of ,america1 the prospect was far from cheerful4 ,eventually the boat was turned a few points further south1 in the direction of land which could not be seen1 but which was known to lie about fifteen miles away on the other side of the ,bay of ,donegal4 ,after having been nearly swamped many times1 and running with bare poles1 owing to the violence of the gale1 the boat arrived at length at ,bundoran4 ,as this place was distant some sixty miles from ,killybegs1 #e it seemed wearisome to return by land1 and a return by sea was out of the question4 ,accordingly1 ,forbes and the writer1 drenched to the skin and without a vestige of baggage1 started forthwith on a walking tour along the west coast of ,ireland1 arriving at ,connemara in the course of the following week4 ,forbes's dislike of sea voyages in after years may in part be traced to this experience4 ,during the greater part of the voyage across ,donegal ,bay he was helpless from sea-sickness2 his companion was busily occupied in baling out the water to prevent the boat from sinking4 ,the letters which ,forbes wrote from school to members of his family are a curious mixture of humour and religion4 ,it was his keen sense of humour which preserved him from becoming morbid4 ,it was this same sense of humour which helped to attract to him at the ,university men on whom he eventually exercised a strong religious influence1 but whom religious conversation would have inevitably repelled4 ,in two letters written to one of his sisters from ,rossall in #ahhf1 the following sentences occur4 ,they show that he found time while at school for a considerable amount of reading which was not connected with his school work3 ',you ask me to tell you what books ,i have been reading4 ,among others1 ,longfellow's ,hiawatha and ,evangeline1 both exquisite2 continually the ,in ,memoriam1 ,idylls of the ,king2 some of ,buchanan1 which ,i scarcely recommend2 ,m4 ,arnold1 which ,i do most heartily recommend2 and ,walt ,whitman1 the #f great poet of democracy2 ,confessions of an ,english ,opium ,eater1 by ,de ,quincey1 good in its way2 ,g4 ,eliot and ,mrs4 ,browning1 c41 c4 ,perhaps you would like some of those4 ,i read ,chas4 ,kingsley's ,andromeda--it is really a splendid rhythmical piece of hexameter--and some of his ,life4 ,i rather like pieces of his poetry1 and the one you sent me ,i liked4 ',my only birthday advice is3 ,read more ,longfellow4 ,if you have any writers1 send me word1 though ,i am sorry to say ,i can appreciate but few4 4 4 4' ,another letter1 written the same year1 is entirely composed of selections from ,tennyson's ',princess1' which1 he says1 ',i have just read through4' ,he ends1 ',mind you send me gleanings of ,milton if you have time4' ,in another1 ',i have been reading a fair amount of ,carlyle at present1 as we had an essay on ,the influence of individuals on great movements of religion1 politics1 and thought1 for which ,i read especially ,carlyle's ,heroes and ,hero ,worship1 and ,emerson's ,representative ,men1 and for which1 ,i am glad to say1 ,i not only got full marks1 but the highest maximum possible4 ,have read ,tennyson's ,queen ,mary4 ,am reading ,harold4 ,i liked the first very much1 but the latter a great deal more4 ,the scene where ,harold debates about telling a lie or the truth is very fine4 4 4 4' ,the rest of the letter is composed of quotations from ',harold4' ,in other letters he says1 ',get ,emerson's ,essays for me4' ',i send you ,aurora ,leigh4 4 4 4' ,he left ,rossall in the summer of #ahhg1 when he #g was nearly twenty1 and entered ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge1 in the following ,october4 ,his brother ,armitage1 now ,dean of ,westminster1 was then fellow and dean of ,christ's ,college1 and ,forbes occupied the attic rooms over his4 ,the following notice by ,dr4 ,james1 now headmaster of ,rugby and formerly headmaster of ,rossall1 appeared in ',the ,rossallian' and is reprinted here at his suggestion3 ',forbes ,robinson came to ,rossall in #ahha4 ,he was a member of a very able family2 an elder brother is ,dean of ,westminster2 another is ,charles ,h4 ,robinson1 ,editorial ,secretary of the ,s4,p4,g4 and translator of part of the ,gospels into ,hausa4 ,he was a delicate boy1 and lived for a year or two in the headmaster's private house1 from which he passed on into ,mr4 ,batson's4 ,rather shy and retiring in disposition1 and unable to take much part in games1 he was not conspicuous in the ,school until he reached the ,sixth1 and did not make friends as easily as some boys do4 ,but the few who knew him well recognised in him a deeply affectionate if very sensitive nature1 and saw how the religious side of it1 afterwards so conspicuous1 was even then developing4 ,his powers as a classical scholar1 though considerable1 were not exceptional2 they enabled him to reach the ,upper ,sixth1 but not to win a scholarship at his entrance to the university1 and ,i well remember advising him to make theology1 to which his inclinations were already drawing him1 his special subject at ,cambridge4 ,to this ,i knew he would bring not only interest but power of reasoning and literary culture4 ,he had won the ,divinity ,prize of the ,school in #ahhe and again in #ahhf1 and the ,english ,essay ,prize 7for an essay on ,the relative value of art1 science1 and literature in education7 in the latter year4 #h ',he went up to ,christ's1 ,cambridge1 in #ahhg1 and at once addressed himself to his favourite study4 ,what strides he was making in it were apparent at once from the extraordinary series of distinctions which he won--a scholarship at the college1 the ,carus ,greek ,testament ,prize for undergraduates1 the ,jeremie ,septuagint ,prize1 a first class in the ,theological ,tripos1 the ,burney ,theological ,essay ,prize1 the ,carus ,prize for ,bachelors1 the ,crosse ,divinity ,scholarship1 and the ,hulsean ,prize all fell to him between #ahhh and #ahic1 and finally in #ahif he was elected to a ,fellowship at ,christ's1 where he had already been ,theological ,lecturer for a year4 ',his essay which gained the ,burney ,prize in #ahia was on ,the ,authority of our ,lord in its bearing upon the ,interpretation of the ,old ,testament4 ,he printed it in #ahic under the title of ,the ,self-limitation of the ,word of ,god as manifested in the ,incarnation4 ,with characteristic modesty he says in his preface3 ,i can claim but little of the work as strictly original4 ,this is far too deprecatory2 the essay is a singularly lucid statement and attempted solution of a most difficult theological problem1 in which all who believe in the ,deity of ,christ must be deeply interested1 and ,i can bear personal testimony to its helpfulness4 ,it was only the other day that ,i was reading it afresh1 for ,i had just recovered it1 when ,i feared that the copy he gave me was hopelessly lost and irreplaceable1 from ,south ,africa1 where a friend to whom ,i had lent it had taken it among his books4 ,among ,forbes ,robinson's later activities were a work on the ,coptic ,apocryphal ,gospels 7the subject1 he wrote to me1 was so technical and uninteresting that ,i did not send you a copy71 and the editing of a ,sahidic fragment of the ,gospels4 ',but his value to ,cambridge and to his college lay mainly in the influence for good which he was able to exert over undergraduates4 ,again and again ,i have been told #i there how great this was2 and it was no little achievement for one whose very modesty and humble-mindedness must have made it difficult4 ,but his heart was in the work1 and in the maintaining of ,christian influences in university life4 ,it is hard to over-estimate the loss which his death at so early an age implies alike to students of theology and to those among whom he was more immediately working4 ,but he has left us the example of a simple and devoted life and the consecration of great and growing powers to his ,master's service4 ,god buries ,his workmen1 but carries on ,his work4' #aj ,,chapter ,,ii ,,life ,,as ,,an ,,undergraduate ,,at ,,cambridge ,from this point forward the sketch of ,forbes's life can be given almost entirely in the words of those who knew him at ,cambridge4 ,a writer in the ,christ's ,college ,magazine for the ,lent term #aijd says3 ',many older friends will always think of him in his attic rooms1 where he began to make his mark in our ,college society upon his first coming up4 ,only two other ,freshmen had rooms in ,college1 and ,robinson's rooms became at once a centre for his year1 and later a meeting-place where the gulfs between higher and lower years were bridged over4 ,a little older than most men of his year1 he was considerably their senior in character and in intellect4 ,he showed at once the qualities which he retained to such a unique degree in later years--an inexhaustible power of making friends with all sorts and conditions of men1 and an insatiable interest in all sides of ,college life2 the most serious things were from the first not beyond his comprehension1 and the most trivial did not appear to bore him1 even when their freshness had worn off4 ,his love of books was catholic2 he possessed a great many and read them #aa to his friends4 ,at the ,college ,debate1 of which he became secretary and president in his second year1 he was a frequent and fluent speaker1 with a remarkable command of language1 though sometimes his eloquence was more than half burlesque4 ,his powers of thought and real strength in argument were more often displayed in private discussions1 where irony and humour hardly veiled the depth of earnestness below4' ,illustration3 ,forbes ,robinson 7#ahhg7 ,during his first three years at ,cambridge he read for the ,theological ,tripos4 ,in the course of his first year he was elected a scholar of his ,college4 ,at the beginning of his second year he won his first ,university distinction1 the ,carus prize for the ,greek ,testament4 ,the other ,university prizes which he gained were the ,jeremie prize for the ,septuagint in #ahhi1 the ,burney prize essay in #ahia1 the ,carus prize for ,bachelors1 the ,hulsean prize essay1 and the ,crosse ,university ,scholarship in #ahib4 ,he took his degree in the first class of the ,theological ,tripos in #ahij1 and obtained a second class in the ,moral ,science ,tripos of #ahia4 ,the year which he spent in reading moral science he afterwards looked back upon as one of the most useful in his life4 ,after he had been reading for some time in view of this ,tripos1 he wrote to a friend3 ',i have come to the conclusion that ,i know nothing1 and am an awful fool into the bargain4 4 4 4 ,the subject is so utterly fresh to me1 so completely unlike theology of any sort at ,cambridge1 that ,i find it hard to do anything at it4 ,in fact1 ,i chucked it up for about ten days in the middle of the term1 and determined to have nothing more to #ab do with it2 but after that rest ,i thought better and renewed the study4 ,it is an excellent training for the mind4 ,i never distinctly remember thinking at all before this term4' ,having learnt to think himself1 his desire was to help others by teaching them to think4 ,one who came under his influence several years later says of him3 ',i owe so much to him in every way4 ,above everything else he taught me to think4 ,i remember so well the first time ,i went to him with a difficulty4 ,i expected him to solve it for me1 instead of which1 at the end of half an hour1 ,i still found that ,i had to think it out for myself4 ,it was a revelation to me1 and has helped me in my dealings with men4' ,the same friend writes3 ',i may mention a conversation ,i once had with him4 ,he had in front of him the answers to some ,theological ,tripos papers4 ,he took up two of them and compared the answers given to the same question by the two men4 ,the answer required was a translation of a passage of ,greek with notes4 ,and1 as far as ,i can remember1 his words were these3 ,now1 ,w----1 this man has passed over the real difficulty4 ,as far as ,i can tell1 he has not even noticed that there is a difficulty4 ,i have given him two marks out of a possible ten4 ,this other man has seen the difficulty and grappled with it4 ,his solution is without doubt incorrect1 but that is quite immaterial4 ,result1 eight marks out of ten4 ,i cannot but think that this attitude of mind was largely the secret of his influence4' ,in another case1 when urging a man to attempt some independent investigation of the ,synoptic problem1 he said2 #ac ',your conclusions may be wrong1 but you can correct them1 and it will teach you to think4' ,one who was an undergraduate with ,forbes says of him3 ,he 'did not take a prominent part in religious movements in the ,college1 such as the ,college prayer meeting or ,bible readings1 though he was occasionally present at them4 ,in chapel his reverence was quiet1 though in no way obtrusive4 ,i think that by not identifying himself with any particular religious party he had greater influence with those men whose minds ran in very different grooves4 ,i always felt when in his company that ,i was conversing with one vastly superior to myself in intellectual powers1 and yet he never appeared conscious of it himself4 ,it is surprising how considerate he was of the feelings of others4 ,i remember a large print of ,pope ,leo ,,xiii4 which used to hang in his rooms as an undergraduate1 which delighted his gyp1 who was a ,romanist1 but scandalised his ,protestant friends4 ,i begged earnestly for a copy of one of his prize essays1 which had been printed though not published4 ,he at first consented1 but almost immediately asked me to return it1 saying that he did not wish it to go out to the world as expressing his matured views4 ,he then asked me to accept instead a small booklet1 which he said ,i should find useful to have in visiting4 ,it contained the verses called ,the ,old1 ,old ,story4 ,he also gave me a copy of the ,practice of the ,presence of ,god1 by ,brother ,lawrence4' ,before he decided to read for the ,moral ,science ,tripos he had thought of going in for the ,semitic ,languages ,tripos4 ,with this object in view he #ad commenced the study of ,syriac4 ,finding that the best ,syriac grammar was written in ,german and had not been translated1 he decided to learn ,german also4 ,he was advised that ,switzerland was a suitable place in which to study ,german1 and accordingly1 after taking his degree1 he started in the summer of #ahij for ,switzerland4 ,the two following letters are inserted in order to illustrate his sense of humour1 as well as to describe the way in which he spent this summer4 ,he eventually returned from ,switzerland1 having made more progress in ,syriac than in ,german1 but without having obtained any great knowledge of either language4 ,soon after his return he decided to commence the study of ,moral ,science instead of the ,semitic languages4 ,to ,h4 ,m4 ,s4 ',habkern3 ,july #ahij4 ',a few days after ,i got to ,switzerland1 by dint of incessant inquiries and correspondence ,i found out the name of a pastor who lived in a sufficiently healthy place and who talked ,german4 ,so ,i girded up my loins and went to visit him4 ,sprechen ,sie ,englisch1 mein ,herr8 ,i asked4 ,nein was the reply4 ,as ,i scarcely knew a word of ,german ,i was in a considerable fix4 ,but ,i found out that the ,pfarrer spoke ,lateinisch and could read ,english a little when it was written4 ,so ,i went up to his study and we got paper and pencil and began4 ,i tried to tell him in a mixture of broken ,english and dog-,latin that ,i intended to give him the honour of my company4 ,he said he would be pleased to take me en pension4 ,he then #ae asked how much ,i wished to pay4 ,i hadn't for the life of me an idea of what ,i ought to pay4 ,ut tibi optimum videtur1 ,i said4 ,but he made me fix my price4 ,then1 when ,i had fixed it1 ,i had to turn it into ,swiss money4 ,the good ,pfarrer was so pleased with the honour of my company that he took me for less than ,i asked4 ,our greatest difficulty next arose3 ,how was my luggage to be conveyed the five miles from the nearest town up a steep hill8 ,latin1 ,french1 ,english1 ,german1 failed to make me understand the situation4 ,at last ,i took in the ,pfarrer's meaning4 ,i was to send it by the milkman after leaving it at a certain hotel4 ,ja1 ,i cried in an ecstasy of joy1 at last grasping his meaning1 ,ja1 ich mittam der ,gepck von der milkman4 ,i arrived the next day4 ,i found the ,pfarrer knew ,latin1 ,greek 7but he pronounces both quite differently from me71 ,german1 ,french1 ,russian1 ,syriac1 ,hebrew1 and a little ,english4 ,his usual custom is to address me in ,german4 ,if ,i fail to understand1 he tries ,latin and intersperses his remarks with ,greek and ,hebrew4 ,so my great difficulty is first of all to find out what language he thinks he is speaking in4 ',yesterday we were sitting1 smoking and drinking1 in the village ,wirthshaus among the natives of the place1 the ,pfarrer addressing me in ,latin1 the villagers staring at his learning in adoration and astonishment1 and laughing at my attempts at ,german4 ,the landlord came up to me when ,i arrived and sent in a bottle of wine for me1 refusing to be paid for it1 for he said that the natives of ,interlaken fleeced the ,english2 but when ,habkern was for once honoured by the #af presence of one1 the people were not going to treat him in the same way4 ',it is curious how the ,pfarrer goes and sits and drinks and gossips in the ,wirthshaus1 even on ,sunday1 ,i think4 ,last ,sunday they had a country dance1 and very curious and pretty was the scene--the old-fashioned wooden room--the odd national dress of the women--the curiously cut brown clothes of the men--the thick boots--the fiddlers raised above the rest--the quaint urn with its inscriptions above--the gaping crowd of villagers4 ,then the church is strange--very rude and simple1 all whitewashed4 ,the women sit on one side1 the men on the other4 ,they stand to pray and hear the text1 and sit to sing and hear the sermon4 ,the organ and font are placed at one end4 ,the elders stand below the organ1 the ,pfarrer is lost in the far distance1 right up in a big pulpit4 ,the ,predigt or sermon is everything4 ,they have one written prayer before and one after the ,predigt4 ,the people never say ,amen or anything--only sing4 ,they sing so slowly that1 although ,i had only been with the ,pfarrer three days1 ,i could almost sing and look out the words in the dictionary at the same time6 ,i talk ,german with every one who will talk with me4 ,so well did ,i spin yarns when ,i had been in the country three or four days1 that with a mixture of ,latin and ,german ,i managed to make a ,german use strong language at some of my tales1 which he was pleased to think were not exactly true4 ,reflecting on the situation afterwards1 ,i remembered that ,i had told him1 among other things1 that ,i had walked nearly fifty stunden #ag in a day4 ,his language was awful4 ,i found afterwards that stunde was not1 as ,i had supposed1 an ,english mile1 but an ,english hour4 ,but ,i keep on talking4 ,i have come to the conclusion that the way to learn a language is to argue in it4 ,accordingly ,i do so4 ,i have tried to convince them that the order of bishops is semi-apostolic1 and that if ,st4 ,paul did not actually wear a surplice himself1 his successors shortly afterwards did4 ',one other thing1 if you ever reply to this letter3 would you copy out a few of the most thickly marked lines in the ,grammarian's ,funeral in my edition of ,browning8 ,they are always in my mind1 but ,i can't quite recollect how they go4 ,there is no poem ,i like so much as that4 ,i would send you some butterflies1 but ,i daren't kill them4 ,some of us may have once been butterflies3 as ,m4 ,arnold says1 ',what was before us we know not1 ,and we know not what shall succeed4' ,to ,h4 ,m4 ,s4 ',habkern3 ,august #ahij4 ',there is a ,french pensionnaire staying here1 the same as ,i am4 ,he is very polite1 but his tastes are diametrically opposite to mine4 ,he likes wine1 walking1 women1 smoking1 painting1 violin and piano playing1 dogs1 and the like4 ',he asked me whether ,i liked the ,french4 ,i told him ,no1 and gave him a good many reasons4 ,he abhors the ,germans4 ,i told him ,i thought the ,germans were a fine race4 ,i'm occupying my time #ah in sleeping1 arguing1 observing the natives1 and reading a ,tauchnitz edition of ,martin ,chuzzlewit1 which is good1 though already a young girl of seventeen has been introduced1 very beautiful and all the rest1 and ,i'm afraid she won't be poisoned1 but marry a certain young man already introduced4 ,i'd give a good deal to be able to write a novel in which all the young ladies tumbled out of windows1 six stories high1 and were picked up dead4 ,i think ,i must try and write one4 ,shall ,i dedicate it to you8 ,the heroine will be a plain old lady with white curls1 close on sixty-five1 without any money1 but with a certain amount of intellect4 ,there will be no marriages1 but suicides and murders if necessary4 ',i'm inventing a ,german word of #a1jjj letters4 ,it is to be divided into some #aej or #bjj compartments4 ,after each compartment there is five minutes for refreshments4 ,after about the #ejjth letter there will be half an hour allowed for dinner4 ,after the #fjjth letter or so there will be a notice to the effect that no person with a weak heart may proceed further without consulting a medical man4 ,after about the #ihjth there will be a notice forbidding any one to go further until their family doctor is in attendance4 ,i have thought of the groundwork of the word--the finished word ,i'm going to send to ,m----1 as he has the strongest constitution of any one ,i know4 ,then ,i shall get ,duke ,bismarck to patent it2 after which ,i shall take out a professorship on the strength of it at ,berne4 ,it will1 of course1 be the ,hauptsache of my existence4' #ai ,forbes was far from being an athlete1 but in #ahia1 shortly before his ordination1 he accomplished the feat of walking with two athletic friends from ,london to ,cambridge in a day1 a distance of more than fifty miles4 ,the following description is by ,mr4 ,a4 ,n4 ,c4 ,kittermaster1 who was one of his companions4 ,walk from ,london to ,cambridge4 ,some of us had read that ,charles ,kingsley had walked from ,london to ,cambridge2 so we determined to follow in his footsteps4 ,we were a party of three--,forbes ,robinson1 ,d4 ,d4 ,robertson1 and myself4 ,we spent the previous day at the ,naval ,exhibition1 the night at the ,liverpool ,street ,hotel1 and at #d4cj ,a4,m4 of ,tuesday1 ,august #be1 #ahia1 we started on our fifty-mile trudge4 ,we walked steadily1 at first over immense stretches of pavement1 till we reached ,ware1 twenty-one miles out4 ,there we had breakfast or lunch of huge chops at #aj4ae4 ,after that we took the road again1 and did not call a halt of any length till we had put another twenty miles behind us4 ,the day was fine but dull1 and we were not troubled by the heat4 ,at the fortieth milestone it began to appear doubtful whether we should all reach the journey's end4 ,i have an entry in my diary3 ',at #dj ,robertson bad1 ,i worse1 ,deanlet 7i4e4 ,forbes7 quite fit4' ,so at ,foulmire1 nine miles from ,cambridge1 we stopped for tea4 ,by this time ,i was in a state of temporary collapse1 but ,i remember the other two during tea carried on an animated discussion upon the creation as described in ,genesis4 ,we all felt better after the #bj rest and covered the last stage fairly easily1 arriving at ,christ's at #i4cj ,p4,m4 ,we had a meal in ,forbes's rooms1 fought our battles over again1 and retired to rest about midnight4 ,the thing which remains with me best is the amazing ease with which ,forbes accomplished the journey4 ,it is a matter of common experience that prolonged physical effort reacts on the mind2 conversation becomes difficult1 and cheerfulness forced4 ,i must say that in my case the thought which for a considerable period occupied my mind was how ,i was to get to the end4 ,but it was not so with ,forbes4 ,he travelled lightly1 talking happily on all subjects the whole day4 ,it seemed to make little difference to him whether he took food or no1 and he was as willing to stop at every place of refreshment we suggested as to march the whole day without a meal4 #ba ,,chapter ,,iii ,,work ,,at ,,cambridge ,in ,september #ahia ,forbes was ordained as curate to his brother ,armitage1 who was at that time vicar of ,all ,saints'1 ,cambridge4 ,several of the letters which are given later refer to his thoughts and feelings at the time of his ordination4 ,his connection with ,all ,saints' did not last more than a year1 as his brother resigned in the following spring4 ,forbes had already been licensed as chaplain to ,emmanuel ,college4 ,he received priest's orders in #ahib4 ,in #ahie he was appointed theological lecturer at ,christ's ,college1 and in the following year1 ,may #cj1 #ahif1 was elected a fellow4 ,during the same year he was appointed an examining chaplain to the ,bishop of ,southwell4 ,one who knew him well1 soon after the time of his ordination1 writes3 ',i cannot remember how we first became acquainted1 beyond the fact that ,i used to meet him in the rooms of some prominent members of the ,college ,football ,,xv4 ,all ,i know is that several of our year got to know him quite well1 and the friendship grew with time4 ,the fact that he had distinguished himself in the ,moral ,science ,tripos at #bb first rather awed me1 a freshman4 ,but ,i soon got over that feeling1 for he was the last person in the world to trouble any one with a sense of intellectual inferiority4 ',i am sure the private business hours of the ,debating ,society were some of his happiest moments4 ,his magnificent assumption of wrath on the most absurd grounds2 his vast intensity over trivialities2 his love for the heat and play of debate1 would have made a stranger believe he lived for nothing else4 ',physical strength and virtue seemed to have a strange attraction for him4 ,his assortment of athlete friends was peculiarly wide1 and his frank admiration of their qualities gave them a pleasant feeling that in some way he looked up to them--a feeling which ,i am sure strengthened the hold he had over them4 ',he was a tireless walker1 and could go far on very little4 ,a party of us used to take long walks1 often on a ,sunday1 to various places in the country4 ,there was generally a volume of ,burke or ,emerson in his pocket1 whose sonorous periods filled the interval when we lunched frugally or rested4 ,i have never known him anything but good-humoured under any conditions4 ,his enthusiasm for our most commonplace jests was unfailing--perhaps one of the surest ways of getting to a man's heart and staying there--and he had a wide tolerance for the minor offences of undergraduate thought and deed4 ,yet1 as for the tone of conversation when he was near1 ,i need scarcely say that one simply did not think of anything unpleasant or vulgar1 much less say it4 ',i used to admire his immense power of putting #bc his thoughts into words1 but he could be silent too4 ,sometimes he would come to my rooms when ,i was working1 throw himself into an arm-chair1 and absolutely refuse to speak4 ,after a considerable interval perhaps he would consider ,i had worked long enough1 and cocoa and conversation would follow4 ,but it was when ,i visited him in his own rooms that ,i remember things most vividly4 ',i can still see that little room under the roof2 the picture on the wall of the dead saint floating on the dark water2 the well-filled bookcase2 the table piled with volumes2 himself throwing everything aside to greet one4 ,it was almost with a feeling of awe that ,i sometimes climbed those stairs and entered into his presence4 ,perhaps it would be for a lesson on the ,new ,testament--for when ,i was reading for a ,theological ,tripos he was generous1 even prodigal1 of help4 ,the lesson over--and there are many who know what a goodly thing a lesson from him on the ,new ,testament was--he would open a volume of ,tennyson--,in ,memoriam most likely--read a few stanzas1 and begin to talk about them4 ,gradually1 it would seem1 the things of the world would fade from him4 ,he forgot the hour and my presence as his thoughts poured out4 ,i sat and listened1 generally silent1 sometimes hazarding a question4 ,presently--it was often late--,i would rise to leave4 ,rapt from his surroundings1 he seemed scarcely conscious of my departure2 and ,i would go quietly out1 almost as though ,i had been on holy ground1 where not once nor twice the dweller had seen ,god face to face4' ,his power of helping men by silent sympathy is #bd referred to by one who writes3 ',the many words of kindness1 but more particularly the silent sympathy he conveyed in some mysterious manner1 will ever keep him present with us4' ,another1 who had known him in his early days at ,christ's1 and again in later years1 writes3 ',when ,i was up he was a nervous retiring man1 at his best when one found him alone in his own room4 ,even then he would sometimes talk little4 ,since my return from ,south ,africa ,i have found him much more at home with men and much more ready to talk1 but retaining his old power of sympathy without words4' ,his own faith was based rather upon intuitive perception of the ,divine love than upon argument4 ,on one occasion1 quite towards the end of his life1 he said to one with whom he was staying1 ',sometimes ,i sit and think1 till ,i can find no reason for the existence of ,god2 and then there rises up in me something which is stronger than the love ,i have for those who are dear to me--and they are very dear--the love of ,god4 ,it seems to smile at my doubts4' ,several of his friends have referred to ,forbes's influence as a power which helped to develop their own sympathy towards others4 ,thus one writes3 ',i think perhaps it was my intercourse with him that first taught me to look out for and appreciate the real goodness--or1 better1 ,christlikeness--of others from whom one differed in important matters and with whom one seemed perhaps to have little in common4' ,in some instances friendship between ,forbes and an acquaintance seems to have arisen where very #be little direct intercourse had taken place4 ,one who was greatly his senior says of him1 ',i have never known any one with whom there was so strong a sense of intimacy founded on so little positive intercourse4' ,in ,july #ahib--;i4e4 about nine months after his ordination as deacon--he took part in a kind of peregrinating mission tour through part of ,south ,cornwall4 ,dressed simply in cassock and cape1 and carrying a small brown paper parcel containing necessary luggage1 he and his brother 7the compiler of this book7 walked from village to village1 preaching afternoon and evening in the open air4 ,at the end of the evening service an appeal was made to the people4 ,it was explained to them that the preachers had come without provision or money1 and hoped to receive hospitality from those to whom they ministered4 ,night after night ,forbes and his companion were taken in and entertained1 often by very poor people4 ,a unique opportunity was thus afforded of getting to know something of the home life as well as of the religious beliefs of the poor4 ,as a rule1 those who acted as hosts were ,nonconformists4 ,forbes spoke once or twice each day to the people who gathered1 and his addresses1 which were generally based on the words ',our ,father1' were admirably suited to the comprehension and needs of the simple country people4 ,for several months during #ahie he took charge of a small country parish near ,cambridge1 called ,toft4 ,while staying at ,toft he wrote to a friend1 ',i like living among country folk and talking with #bf and visiting them4 ,i want to get out of my life into their lives4 ,this parish work humiliates if it does not humble one4 4 4 4 ,the smallest parish is a tremendous responsibility4' ,the following are a few additional notes contributed by others who knew ,forbes at ,christ's3 ',his broad sympathies1 his unfailing efforts to find out the good in persons and systems--the rays of truth which each possessed--combined with the rare faculty of going deep down beneath vexed questions1 and thus lifting controversies to a higher and serener atmosphere3 these were qualities in him which were known especially by those privileged to have more intimate knowledge of him than that vouchsafed by formal lectures or social gatherings4 4 4 4 ,he is now another link with the life beyond these conflicting voices1 one who loved ,heaven's silence more than fame4' ,the same writer says of him in another letter3 ',his extreme fairness and toleration1 which at first seemed to me to reduce half one's cherished beliefs to open questions1 was of the greatest value in dispelling ignorance and prejudice1 and in promoting true charity and a more intelligent faith4 ,he delighted to call attention to the fact that our ,lord found something commendable and exemplary in the serpent4 ,and so1 in dealing with those with whom he most disagreed1 he tried to fix attention on that portion of truth which lay behind their opinions1 or on those real difficulties1 to be slighted only by #bg the superficial1 with which they were grappling4 ,tertullian1 with his love of scoring off opponents1 fared badly at his hands1 and he used to treat ,clement of ,alexandria more sympathetically than ,irenaeus4 ',it was striking to find a mind so evenly balanced and philosophical become fired with enthusiasm as he spoke in simplest language1 in chapel or elsewhere1 of great ,christian truths or the victories of faith4 ,his sermons influenced1 ,i believe1 many of the naturally careless4 ,simple1 impartial1 earnest and sympathetic1 he won1 ,i know1 the deepest affection and respect of many4' ,another writes3 ',bright1 pure1 and strong--this was the impression he gave me 4 4 4 4 ,many men will be very sorry that he is not here any more1 but every one who knew him will be very thankful that he was here1 and that they had an opportunity of hearing him think sometimes4 ,i recall him most in his own rooms1 beginning to talk on some small matter1 and gradually lifting us higher and still higher1 until we all silently listened1 following as best we1 with our muddier minds1 could2 and even when he got beyond us there were still inspiration and strength to be got from his flashing eyes and on-rushing earnestness2 but if some smaller mind broke in1 in a moment he was down at the level of that mind1 half bantering and wholly sympathising4 ,nevertheless1 some of us have never forgotten the things he showed us as he led us up1 and the possibility of soaring very high without losing touch with those whose levels are pathetically human4 4 4 4 ,i do know that he helped #bh me much1 and that many things he said ,i shall never forget1 and thank ,god for still4' ,a ,cambridge and international athlete1 an intimate friend of ,forbes1 writes3 ',though ,i have lost your brother ,forbes1 and life will be for ever poorer to me1 ,i can't thank ,god enough that ,i ever knew him and loved him1 and that he called himself my friend4 ,he was so dear to me--my greatest friend in the world4 ,his goodness and his help to me in my ,cambridge days were wonderful4 ,he altered my life4 ,god has called him home and to the blessed rest of the children of ,god1 and we are rich still with his memory and the influence of his beautiful1 patient1 ,christlike life4' ,in another letter he writes3 ',the death1 or1 as ,i like to think of it1 the passing of ,forbes into the ,great ,beyond has been such a grief to me4 ,you have no idea what he was to me--a real man sent from ,god into my life4 ,i could do nothing when ,i heard the sad1 and to me utterly unexpected1 news1 but kneel down by my bedside1 and weep till ,i could weep no more for my beloved friend4 ,i feel so rich and proud to have had him for my friend1 and to have had his love2 and so do many ,cambridge men4 ,oh1 but ,i did so love him6 and my prayer now is that the memory of him with me always may strengthen my weak and feeble life1 and help me to live somewhat more as he lived1 very near the ,master4' ,he obtained but little help from self-introspection or self-examination4 ,thus he writes in one of the letters given later on3 ',i am not sure that we cannot learn more about others than we can about ourselves4 #bi ,i never think it is profitable to study oneself too closely4 ,i never could meditate with any profit on my sins4 ,but there1 ,i dare say ,i differ from many others4' ,to very intimate friends he would in rare instances admit that the secret of any influence which he possessed over men was the outcome of his efforts to pray for them4 ,one who had known him intimately at ,christ's writes in #aijd3 ',about eighteen months ago ,i had the privilege of spending a night with him1 and then for the first time ,i realised how much of his spiritual power was the outcome of prayer4 ,he told me that in his younger days he had taken every opportunity of personally appealing to men to come to ,christ4 ,but1 he went on1 as ,i grow older ,i become more diffident1 and now often1 when ,i desire to see the ,truth come home to any man1 ,i say to myself1 ',if ,i have him here he will spend half an hour with me4 ,instead1 ,i will spend that half-hour in prayer for him4' ,later on1 when ,i had retired for the night1 he came to me again and said1 ,w----1 what ,i have said to you is in the strictest confidence3 don't mention it to any one4 ,and this revelation of his inner life is my last memory of him4' ,on another occasion he said to one with whom he was staying1 when speaking of the little that men could do for each other1 ',i think that ,i should go mad were it not for prayer4' ,as an instance of his common sense in a matter in which as a bachelor he could have had no personal experience1 he strongly urged a married man1 before #cj deciding to accept a curacy which had been offered to him1 to let his wife see the vicar's wife or women-folk4 ',she will know intuitively1' he said1 'whether she can get on with them and they with her1 and it will make all the difference to your work and happiness4' ,the man to whom this advice was offered writes3 ',the advice was given seriously1 but with that bright twinkle of his2 and ,i owe much to it1 for we have been here since 4 4 4 and ,i don't want to go4' ,the following is an extract from a notice which appeared in the ',guardian '6 ',by his published work he is best known to the outer world as one of the few ,english scholars who have given attention to ,coptic4 ,in #ahif he edited ,the ,coptic ,apocryphal ,gospels in the ,cambridge ,texts and ,studies4 ,the important article on the ,coptic ,version in ,hastings's ,bible ,dictionary came also from his pen1 and he was engaged on an edition of the ,sahidic fragments of ,st4 ,luke's ,gospel4 ,his deepest interest1 however1 lay not in these subsidiary studies1 but in the fundamental problems of theology proper4 ,his ,burney ,prize essay1 printed at the ,university ,press in #ahic under the title of ,the ,self-limitation of the ,word of ,god as manifested in the ,incarnation1 is no doubt comparatively slight1 and in some respects immature2 but its reverent and fearless treatment of the difficulties of his great theme gave promise of work of permanent value in this field4 ,his interest in the great problems never flagged1 and his sympathetic touch with the life and thought of the younger men in his college kept him constantly #ca engaged on the task of putting into clear and ever clearer expression such solutions as he was able to attain4 ,his sermons in ,college ,chapel were singularly effective1 because he never wasted a word1 and because every sentence was felt to be the outcome of strenuous thought tested by living experience4 ',it is not surprising1 therefore1 that he exercised an unusual influence upon younger students4 ,his friends were very closely bound to him indeed1 in bonds which death can consecrate but cannot sever4 ,they can never cease to thank ,god for the pure1 bright1 tender1 utterly sincere1 fearless1 and faithful spirit ,he has given them to love4' #cb ,,chapter ,,iv ,,the ,,last ,,few ,,months ,from the time that ,forbes took his degree at ,cambridge his health was far from strong4 ,he suffered from time to time from a form of eczema which caused him a good deal of discomfort and pain4 ,many of his letters contain references to the fact that he had been unwell and had been unable to do as much work as he had hoped4 ,in ,september #ahig he went with his brother ,armitage on a visit to ,st4 ,petersburg and ,moscow4 ,he stayed in the house of a ,russian priest at ,st4 ,petersburg1 and was much interested in the work of ,father ,john of ,kronstadt1 with whom an interview was arranged which unfortunately fell through at the last moment4 ,towards the end of #ahig he developed a bad cough and was threatened with phthisis4 ,he accordingly spent ,christmas and the first two or three months of #ahih at ,st4 ,moritz in ,switzerland4 ,his health then seemed to be much improved4 ,for several years he went back to ,st4 ,moritz to spend the greater part of the ,christmas vacation4 ,he took great delight in tobogganing1 and on one occasion was awarded a prize for a race in which he took part4 ,in the summer of #ahii he went out to ,south ,africa #cc during the ,long ,vacation4 ,he visited ,pretoria and had an interview with ,president ,kruger and his wife4 ,one of his letters records his impressions of the ,president4 ,he was for some time disposed to believe that the war1 which broke out soon after his return1 could and should have been avoided1 but he subsequently modified his views on this point4 ,towards the end of ,august #aijc the pain from which he had suffered intermittently for years became so much worse that he came up to consult a ,london doctor1 and by his advice remained in town as a patient at ,st4 ,thomas's ,home4 ,when he entered the home he fully expected to undergo an operation within a fortnight2 but the doctor who had suggested it declared1 after further examination1 that no operation was necessary4 ,meanwhile ,forbes lingered on in the home week after week4 ,eventually a partial operation was performed1 and after he had spent thirteen weeks in the home the surgeon suggested his removal to a private nursing home1 where he could keep him under closer observation4 ,here he performed a second operation4 ,this seemed at first to have been a success1 and after a fortnight in this private home he was well enough to start for ,switzerland again4 ,he went at first to ,st4 ,moritz1 where he had been so often before2 but1 finding that the pain returned and that he could not sleep1 he went down to ,alassio on the ,riviera4 ,here he was for several weeks till his return to ,england4 ,he reached ,westminster on ,january #ac and went up to ,cambridge on the following day4 ,for a few days he was well enough to lecture1 and it seemed as though he might be able to #cd resume his old work4 ,on ,sunday evening1 ,january #ag1 he was 'at home' in his rooms and received over sixty undergraduates who came to welcome him back4 ,soon the old trouble returned1 and he rapidly grew worse4 ,his pain became almost constant1 and he was removed with great difficulty to another ,london nursing home on ,january #bi4 ,it was then proposed that the original operation which had been suggested1 but had never been performed1 should take place1 and he fully expected that this would result in his restoration to health and to work4 ,a few days later he was threatened with blood-poisoning1 and it became obvious that the operation must be delayed4 ,on ,saturday evening1 ,february #f1 he seemed fairly cheerful4 ,neither he nor his doctors had any idea that he was in an extremely critical state4 ,about midnight1 as the pain had become worse1 his doctor was sent for1 and he gave him an injection of morphia4 ,soon after this he asked his nurse to turn the light down and said to her1 ',if ,i am asleep in the morning do not wake me4' ,she looked in about #c4cj ,a4,m4 to see if he was asleep1 and1 finding him awake1 inquired if he would like a drink of champagne4 ,he said yes1 and asked her first of all to help him turn over to the other side4 ,as she was in the act of assisting him1 he passed away1 without a movement of any kind4 ,a happy smile lingered long on his face after the end had come4 ,his body was removed the same evening to ,st4 ,faith's ,chapel1 in ,westminster ,abbey4 ,here on the following ,thursday morning1 ,february #aa1 at #i ,a4,m41 the funeral service was said4 ,the chapel #ce was filled with his friends1 who had come from ,cambridge and elsewhere4 ,his body was buried the same afternoon at ,eastbourne in the same grave with that of his sister1 the ,deaconess ,cecilia1 who had passed away five months before4 ,the inscription on the memorial card issued to his friends was3 ,,cum ,,christo ,,victurus ,,de ,,morte ,,ad ,,vitam ,,migravit ,,dominica ,,in ,,sexagesima ,,anno ,,salutis ,,mcmiv ,,aetatis ,,suae ,,xxxvii4 ,and1 doubtless1 unto thee is given ,a life that bears immortal fruit ,in those great offices that suit ,the full-grown energies of heaven4 #cf ,,chapter ,v ,,two ,,appreciations ,the two following sketches of ,forbes ,robinson's life at ,cambridge have been contributed1 the first by the ,rev4 ,t4 ,c4 ,fitzpatrick1 ,fellow and ,dean of ,christ's ,college1 and the second by the ,rev4 ,digby ,b4 ,kittermaster1 of ,clare ,college1 now ,head of the ,shrewsbury ,school ,mission in ,liverpool4 ,mr4 ,fitzpatrick writes3 ',college life has changed a good deal since the days when a young graduate1 on his election to a fellowship1 was advised not to see too much of the undergraduate members of the ,college1 that the division between the senior and junior members of the ,college might be preserved4 ,a custom of that kind1 once established1 is not easy to break1 for traditions of all sorts1 good and bad1 live long in ,college4 ',fortunately1 the relations between the undergraduates and the fellows of the ,college are gradually becoming more natural1 to the benefit of the whole body4 ,forbes ,robinson will be long remembered for the influence that he exerted in this #cg direction1 and what he has effected it will be comparatively easy for others to carry on4 ',it is my desire to give some slight impression of his life in ,college1 and ,i do not wish to say much about his teaching work4 ,i must mention1 however1 what frequently struck me1 the great joy he had in teaching2 his success was not surprising4 ,when he found 7in ,january last7 that he could not take up all his lecture work he would not allow another to give in his place the course of lectures on ,church ,history4 ,i want1 he said to me1 to give them myself in my own way1 and he hoped to have given them this ,easter term4 ,i was not surprised to hear from a pupil of the interest that he and others found in a similar course of lectures which he had given the previous year4 ,he put things so1 the pupil told me1 that you could not forget what he had said4 ',my last recollection of him as a teacher bears witness to his interest and purpose4 ,word was brought me before morning chapel that he had been obliged to call in the doctor in the middle of the night4 ,i went to his rooms after chapel and found that he was asleep1 ,i put up a notice that he would be unable to lecture4 ,he awoke soon after ,i had left his rooms2 he had another notice put up that he would lecture in his rooms4 ,when ,i came back to ,college later in the morning ,i looked in and found him lying on his sofa with the room full of men1 sitting where they could4 ,the class will not forget that lecture1 nor shall ,i forget the sight4 ',when two men have lived a number of years within the same ,college1 it is difficult for them to #ch realise the change in their relationship that has come with time4 ,there is a comradeship that comes through the influence of circumstances rather than from that personal attraction which two men feel for one another1 and which arose they don't remember when or how4 ,it was this comradeship of work and the sharing of responsibilities that led me to know ,forbes ,robinson4 ,we had lived some years in ,college before ,i knew much of him2 ,i was some years his senior1 and our lines of work were very different4 ,as far as ,i know1 he never talked to older men in that frank way which was his custom with those of his own age1 and still more with men younger than himself4 ,some weeks ago ,i was staying at the hotel on the ,riviera where he had been at ,christmas time4 ,the ,english lady1 whose husband keeps the house1 told me that with them ,forbes ,robinson hardly talked at all1 but that he took their boy out for long walks and talked to him2 and the boy's face lit up as ,i spoke to him of ,forbes4 ',there is still the recollection in ,college1 handed on from year to year1 of the walk which he took at the end of a ,long ,vacation from ,london to ,cambridge with two other men1 and how he talked all the way4 ,it was these conversations1 often prolonged for two or three hours1 that impressed those to whom he opened out his thoughts1 and who in turn let him see something of their inner life4 ',forbes always had one or two special friends among the younger men1 whom he seemed to me to look upon as heroes2 he always yearned for sympathy1 and he was prepared to give to others all that #ci he had got4 ,this closer relationship with a few men did not in the least narrow his interest in the life of the ,college4 ,he gained1 ,i cannot believe that it can have been without an effort long and hard1 the power of taking an interest in all sorts of things that form no small part of the life of the average man4 ,there was nothing strained or exaggerated in his relations with other men2 he was at all times just himself4 ',when he was elected a ,fellow1 being also ,theological ,lecturer1 he was anxious to do something to interest and help those who were not theological students1 and he had1 first on ,sunday mornings after ,chapel1 and afterwards in the latter part of the afternoons1 ,greek ,testament readings for non-theological men1 and some terms he took up some of the problems that present themselves as difficulties to the thoughtful man4 ,these papers were prepared with great care1 and1 as ,i know1 at no small cost of time and energy4 ',on ,sunday evenings he was at home from #i to #aa to any members of the ,college who cared to come4 ,on those occasions it was a curious sight that met the eyes of any late comer as he opened the door and saw men in groups sitting on the floor1 as chairs were insufficient2 as a rule there was no general subject of conversation--numbers made that impossible4 ,most ,sunday evenings there was music1 but not always1 and it was difficult at the end of the evening to say what could have brought so many men together4 ,it was a common ground of meeting for different kinds of men4 ,forbes ,robinson was often at his best on these occasions2 he would join #dj first one group and then another1 and take part in the subject which was being discussed4 ,generally one or two would remain when the others left1 and deeper problems would then be talked over4 ,only on one ,sunday of last term was ,forbes ,robinson well enough to be at home4 ,the room was more crowded than ,i had ever seen it4 ,it was a sort of welcome back after his absence the previous term4 ,it was evident that it gave him pleasure1 and evident1 too1 that he was all the time in pain4 ,yet with a brightness1 which must have cost him much1 he talked with one and another of simple daily interests in the way that showed his sympathy with life1 and gained for him the power of saying on other occasions deeper things4 ',nothing could have been simpler than the character of these gatherings4 ,simplicity was the secret of his power4 ',i find it impossible to write of my own conversations with him2 they dealt chiefly with the difficulties of ,cambridge1 of ,college life1 and of the lives of those in our ,college for whom we felt we had a responsibility4 ,talking of the difficulties of belief1 ,i was struck by his quiet answer3 ,i do not believe some things which ,i did when ,i was younger2 but those which ,i believe1 ,i believe more firmly4 ,forbes ,robinson had a great belief in the power of intercession4 ,quite recently a man in his year told me that when ,forbes ,robinson was an undergraduate he had known him spend two hours during the afternoon in intercession for his friends4 ,one is not surprised that prayer was a subject on which he #da thought much4 ,he was to have written an important article on it4 ',as we talked together of different men1 ,i remember being struck with the desire he expressed that men should be good and strong1 and not of any one type4 ,he had a great confidence in the essential goodness that there is in men1 and he always formed a high estimate of another4 ',his letters will indicate how deeply he entered into the lives of others1 and how wide were his sympathies4 ,a member of another ,college told me that the news of the death of ,forbes ,robinson reached him just after the close of their evening chapel1 and he had not long returned to his rooms when an ,indian gentleman called1 an undergraduate of this ,college1 who almost in tears told him of all that ,forbes had done for him1 and how he had learnt in ,hall at ,christ's from the strange silence that something must have happened1 and was told of the loss that came so unexpectedly upon us on ,sunday1 ,february #g4 ',i close this short account of my friend with extracts from three letters casually taken from those which have reached me4 ,a young clergyman writes3 ,i feel ,i owe a very great debt to him1 both as a lecturer and as a friend4 ,his clearness of mind and power of thought were such as ,i have never seen in any other man4 ,but far more precious than these intellectual gifts was the inspiration of his personal character4 ,his ideals were so high1 and he lived so close to them4 ,few lives have better expressed the truth of the words of which he was so fond3 ',he that #db loseth his life shall find it4' ,a schoolmaster writes3 ,the last talk ,i had with him was a month before my ordination1 and ,i remember the emphasis that he laid on the praying side of a clergyman's life4 ,a doctor writes3 ,looking back upon my time at ,christ's1 ,i think that of all the influences which helped me1 the most potent was my friendship with ,forbes ,robinson4 4 4 4 ,i came to know him somewhat intimately by spending an ,easter vacation with him1 and several of our conversations then have left a lasting impression on my mind4 4 4 4 ,i suppose1 as one gets older and sees so much more of death1 that a deepening faith takes away that sense of personal loss and leaves behind a feeling of gladness that yet another friend has passed to the ,communion of ,saints4 ',of his life we may use the motto of his ,college3 ',,ad ,,honorem ,,christi ,,jesu ,,et ,,fidei ,,ejus ,,incrementum4' ,mr4 ,kittermaster writes3 ',forbes ,robinson did not regard any one of us as a mere undergraduate1 one of a mass2 that was the first thing which those of us who knew him as undergraduates learnt4 ,he was genuinely interested from the first in his undergraduate acquaintances2 interested in them as men1 not as promising pupils1 not as likely scholars1 not as athletes1 not as material for improving influence1 but as men--individuals1 each possessing a separate and distinct human #dc personality1 and therefore of the truest and deepest interest to him4 ',our public schools taught us 7and for most of us ,cambridge continued the teaching7 that to be of any real importance and consequence among his fellows a man must be good at games1 or perhaps--but this more rarely--good at work4 ,such is the simple creed of the undergraduate4 ,if he satisfies neither of the above requirements1 then he recognises1 with greater or less sadness1 that he is an ordinary man1 the average undergraduate4 ,he is one of the crowd if he has no athletic powers to commend him to the notice of his fellows in statu pupillari2 he is one of the crowd if he has no slightest hope of making for himself any name in the intellectual world1 to commend him to the leaders of thought at ,cambridge4 ,and this knowledge is to many a ,cambridge boy1 playing at being a man1 a matter of real1 if unconfessed1 grief4 ',but there is no such thing as the average man1 or at least as the average undergraduate4 ,this was the belief which ,forbes ,robinson held with increasing conviction as his life went on4 ,and it was this belief which accounted to some extent for the very large part which his friendship undoubtedly played in the life of many a ,cambridge undergraduate4 ',for a man condemned by his fellows and himself to the position of the ordinary man found himself in the presence of ,forbes 7as all of us universally called him7 to be no such thing4 ,gradually and with genuine surprise he learned from him--not by any definite #dd word of teaching--that though it might cost him efforts painful and many to get the better of his special1 and though athletic fame knew him not at all1 yet the possibilities of his own peculiar personal life were wonderful and great4 ,for here was one who compelled men by his genuine unaffected interest in their lives and work to be themselves genuinely interested in them too4 ,a man could not know ,forbes for long and not be quickly conscious of a new sense of the value of himself1 which made him believe that his own personality and life were things of great importance4 ,for ,he is interested in me is what almost every man felt from the start of his acquaintance with ,forbes4 ,he is interested in me we felt when he passed us in the street with his quaint humorous smile of recognition2 we felt the same when we entered his room1 to be received often without a word but with the same half smile3 we felt the same again if we knew that he was watching the progress of a football match or boat race in which we were taking part4 ,and he is interested in me--most wonderful of all--we felt as we listened to him in the lecture room1 and were compelled to attention2 for his interest in the men in front of him1 coupled with his interest in his subject1 forced us all--pass men and honours men alike--to listen to the history of ,church and ,doctrine and ,creeds4 ,it was this unfeigned interest in men1 simply as men1 that in the first instance gave him the influence which he certainly exercised over all sorts of men1 including the kind of men whom the majority of their fellows disregarded1 #de or perhaps despised2 the babes and sucklings of the undergraduate world1 to quote another4 ,such men1 in whom most of us could find little to attract us1 were to him vastly interesting--interesting for their simple human personality4 ',some men perhaps never discovered from what source his interest in them sprang4 ,they knew that their views of the possibilities of their own life were enlarged1 that they believed in themselves more for having been with him2 but it was not all at once that they discovered the reason of his interest and belief in them4 ,it was due to the ,christ4 ,with each new friendship and acquaintance which ,forbes made--and this is especially true of young men--he saw deeper into the meaning of the ,incarnation of ,christ4 ,this was the secret of his extraordinary interest and amazing belief in nearly every one of us4 ,he saw in us all1 however ordinary1 however commonplace--yes1 however unlovely were our lives--something somewhere of ,jesus ,christ4 ',then some of us were privileged to discover that what he felt for us was something far deeper and holier than is expressed by the word interest4 ,it was love4 ,in every fullest sense he understood the grand full meaning of the word4 ,his love for his friends was something altogether larger and deeper and truer than is generally understood by the word4 ,it was so holy a thing that it is hard to write of it4 ,he knew1 and the knowledge is perhaps rarer than is supposed1 what in all its fulness was the meaning of the love of one man for another4 ,this is why he could enter into the spirit of ,tennyson's ,in #df ,memoriam as almost no one else could4 ,tennyson's experience might have been so entirely his own4 ,his love for his friends was indeed a wonderful1 sacred thing1 beautiful to see4 ,with ,henry ,drummond he felt that it was better not to live than not to love4 ,love was to him a part of all his being3 for in him dwelt the strong ,son of ,god1 ,immortal ,love1 compelling him to love his fellow-men4 ',it was to him a real grief that 7as he often quite wrongly supposed7 one or two of those1 for whom he would quite willingly have cut off his right hand if in any way it could have advantaged them1 cared not at all for him1 nor ever understood how he cared for them4 ,but he found relief from the strange unsatisfied longing1 engendered in him by this belief1 in intense continuous prayer for those whom he loved4 ,he prayed1 it is certain1 as few men pray4 ,prayer was to him the very breath of life4 ,and his prayers1 like his life1 must have been utterly selfless4 ,many do not understand the amount they owe to his prayers4 ,some of us may some day realise the magnitude of the debt2 at present it is not seen4 ,but he prayed with all the effort of his being for his friends3 eagerly1 passionately1 unceasingly he prayed4 ,pray for him1 believe in him2 believe in him1 pray for him1 he was never tired of saying to those who spoke to him of some disappointing friend4 ,and his own life was a proof of the power which lay behind such prayer4 ',to those reading this who did not know ,forbes ,robinson it may seem that a man of such intensity of feeling and holiness of life would be more likely #dg to frighten away than to attract to close quarters the average undergraduate 7whose existence he denied74 ,this most certainly was not the case4 ,for1 if there was in him something utterly divine1 he was also human as ever man could be4 ,he admired1 like the veriest freshman1 the physical strength and powers of the athlete4 ,in his presence the man of bodily attainments and strength of limb experienced the strange sensation of being looked up to by one whom he knew to be utterly superior to him4 ,but perhaps nearly all who knew him experienced this at one time or another2 for he must have been one of the most humble men that have ever lived4 ,his humility was almost a fault4 ,it led him to depreciate himself so far4 ,and yet how beautiful a thing it was6 ,he did indeed count all men better than himself4 ',he easily condoned offences which in some eyes1 and especially the eyes of dons1 loom as a general rule heinous and large4 ,and the riotous undergraduate1 who cuts chapels and lectures1 found that a don--yes1 and a junior dean--could be a friend of his4 ',he possessed too a keen and real sense of humour4 ,he could1 and often did1 laugh with all his heart4 ,he chaffed continuously his large circle of undergraduate friends4 ,when he was questioning a man in the lecture-room1 you felt that all the time he was half chaffing him4 ,he addressed us all in lectures as ,mr41 in a half serious1 half amused style4 ,it is the only chance for some men to retain any self-respect--to address them as ',mr4'--he would say1 after the discovery of some more than usual piece of #dh ignorance in his class of special men2 for how can a man have any self-respect unless addressed as ',mr4' who does not know which are the ,pastoral ,epistles1 or who is the ,bishop of ,durham 7then ,bishop ,westcott78 ',he could not remember the name of his best friend on occasions1 and he would recount with real glee how he had been known successfully to introduce two men1 not knowing the name of either4 ,on one occasion it fell to him to introduce to each other a low-caste ,west ,african native and a particularly high-caste ,brahmin rejoicing in a lofty sounding polysyllabic title3 of course he transposed the names--with results1 so he declared1 almost fatal to himself4 ',he would display with humorous pride to his athletic friends a photograph of himself coming in second in a toboggan handicap race at ,st4 ,moritz1 which he always maintained he morally won4 ,he was full of spontaneous humour4 ,when he greeted you1 when he looked at you1 when he talked with you1 it was always with a half smile on his face4 ,it was his sense of humour which procured him a quick entrance into many a man's life and heart4 ,it was his sense of humour which made the hostile undergraduate1 hauled for cutting lectures or chapels1 forget his hostility and the presence of the don2 though at the end of the interview he1 probably for the first time1 began to think whether chapel-going had any meaning1 whether a lecture1 if listened to1 might conceivably profit the listener4 ,it was his sense of humour which made all feel at home with him1 which at the first attracted the most unlikely men1 #di which inspired with confidence the shyest1 and made the most frivolous and thoughtless not afraid of him4 ,yet while he would laugh1 and make us laugh1 for as long as ever any one wished1 through all his unaffected merriment he made men feel the strange earnestness of his life4 ,and all knew that1 while he never obtruded on us religious or even serious matters1 he was ready at a moment's notice to speak with us of spiritual things4 ,and most men felt something of what a friend of his wrote of him after his death3 ,he understood of 'the things that matter' more than any man that ,i shall ever meet4 ,and many men who owe to ,forbes ,robinson their first serious thoughts of and their first insight into the things that matter must feel the same4 ,it is this fact that makes it impossible to measure the far-reaching deep influence of his life4 ,for the greatness of that life lay not in any large influence on any large body of undergraduates1 though the undergraduate life of ,christ's ,college must1 as a whole1 have felt his real influence2 nor was his life great simply because he was a scholar and a thinker4 ,but his life was great1 and will for all time remain great1 because it was an inspiration--there is no other word3 it was1 and is1 a lasting1 vivid1 real inspiration to a few4 ,what ,bishop ,westcott did on a large scale1 ,forbes ,robinson did on a small4 ,he inspired men--inspired them to search for and hold to the realities of life4 ',to sum up3 a man admitted into the inner chamber of his life learnt there something of these three things3 7a7 ,the value of his own personality1 7b7 the meaning of love1 7c7 the power of prayer4 #ej 'a4 ,the value of his own personality4--,a man1 as he talked with ,forbes1 was taught with increasing clearness the amazing possibilities of life for any one who has tried to think what it means to say that this is ,i4 ,many of us1 conscious in ourselves only of very ordinary attainments1 of no very high ideals1 of weaknesses of character1 learnt from our friend that in spite of all this1 our own personality was ,god's greatest gift to us4 ,we learnt from him that our own particular commonplace life was1 with all its failures and inconsistencies1 a tremendous enterprise1 big with opportunities4 ,he taught us this by his belief in us4 ,he held 7again like ,bishop ,westcott7 through everything to the faith of man naturally ,christian4 ,by his belief in a man he forced him at last to believe in himself4 ,for he taught us that we were1 each one1 two men--the real ,ego and the false--and that the real self must in the end have the mastery over the false1 because that real self was the ,christ4 'b4 ,the meaning of love4--,it is impossible for lesser natures to enter into all that the word love meant to ,forbes4 ,his love for his friends was wonderful1 passing the love of women4 ,he loved some men with an intensity of feeling impossible to describe4 ,it was almost pain to him4 ,if he loved a man he loved him with a passionate love 7no weaker expression will do74 ,we undergraduates found our natures too small to understand it4 ,yet1 as we learnt to know him more and more1 we began too to learn a little of what real love is--we began to learn what can be the meaning and the wonder and the power #ea and the depth of the love of man for man4 ,and we understood in time that his love for us and his belief in us sprang from the same high source--from the ,christ in him1 in us4 'c4 ,the power of prayer4--,this last lesson explained the other two4 ,perhaps only a few of those who knew ,forbes as undergraduates learnt it4 ,yet an intimate knowledge of him must have forced almost any man to the belief that 'more things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of4' ,he prayed for those he loved1 it is certain1 for hours at a time4 ,all his thoughts about some men gradually became prayers4 ,he could not teach us everything that prayer meant to him2 he could not teach us to pray as he prayed4 ,yet through him one or two at least of his undergraduate friends saw a little further into the eternal mystery of prayer4 ,and men must sometimes--with all reverence be it said--have experienced in his presence the same kind of a feeling of some great unseen influence at work as that which the disciples must have experienced in the presence of ,christ after ,he1 apart and alone1 had watched through the night with ,god in prayer4 ,for many an hour of his life did ,forbes spend like that1 striving with ,god for those he loved4 ,he believed--he knew 7this was his own testimony7--that he could in this way bring to bear upon a man's life more real effective influence than by any word of direct personal teaching or advice4 ,so did he prove once more that the man of power in the spiritual world is the man of prayer4 ',these are the great lessons of ,forbes ,robinson's #eb life--lessons which many a careless undergraduate learnt in a greater or less degree1 and1 learning1 caught from the teacher something of his passion for life and love and prayer1 for service of ,god and man4 ',there must be many who will not soon forget the lessons2 there must be many in whose lives the influence and inspiration of that saintly life will be for ever a power making for holiness and high ideals of living2 there are1 it is certain1 very many who will thank ,god continually that they were1 in their undergraduate days1 allowed to call ,forbes ,robinson friend4 ',how many of us1 when we heard with a shock of almost horror that he had passed from us1 conjured up before us the picture we shall never see again--the picture of our friend sitting any evening at his table in ,darwin's historic rooms at ,christ's1 dimly lighted with candles6 ,we shall remember long the quick look up at our entrance1 the half-smile on his face1 the welcome of a man's love in his eyes1 however busy and tired he might be4 ,then1 though it cost him later hours out of bed1 the invitation to sit down1 followed quickly by an indignant remonstrance as we ousted his cat from the best arm-chair4 ,and then the talk that followed3 sometimes almost trivial2 sometimes 7but only if we wished it7 deeply serious2 sometimes--and these occasions were precious--a kind of soliloquy on his part1 as he spoke of ,god1 of the realities of life1 of love1 of prayer4 ,then1 with still the same half-smile1 he would bid us ,good night1 and watch us out of the room with the same look of love in his eyes with which he welcomed us1 #ec as he turned back to his table to work and think and pray far into the night4 ',so many a one of us has left him again and again1 to return to the merry1 careless1 selfish undergraduate world a nobler1 better man4 ,and now he has passed from us--dead ere his prime we should say1 did we not understand that somewhere the faithful1 hopeful1 loving soul has better work to do4 ,he is1 as he ever was1 in ,christ4 ,he lives4 ,his life remains here and beyond4 ,his faith in ,god1 in prayer2 his hope for every man2 his utterly wonderful1 amazing love1--they still remain4 ,for nuni menei 7nothing can rob us of the word7 pistis1 elpis1 agape1 ta tria tauta2 meizpon de touton he agape4' ,transcriber's note3 ,the above ,greek phrases were transliterated as follows3 nuni--nu1 upsilon1 nu1 iota2 menei--mu1 epsilon1 nu1 epsilon1 iota2 pistis--pi1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 iota1 final sigma2 elpis--epsilon1 lambda1 pi1 iota1 final sigma2 agape--alpha 7soft breathing mark71 gamma1 alpha1 pi1 eta2 ta--tau1 alpha2 tria--tau1 rho1 iota1 alpha2 tauta--tau1 alpha1 upsilon1 tau1 alpha2 meizpon--mu1 epsilon1 iota1 zeta1 omega1 nu2 de--delta1 epsilon2 touton--tau1 omicron1 upsilon1 tau1 omega1 nu2 he--7rough breathing mark7 epsilon2 agape--alpha 7soft breathing mark71 gamma1 alpha1 pi1 eta #ed ,,letters ,to ,a4 ,v4 ,r4 ,brislington ,hill1 ,bristol3 ,september #bd1 #ahij4 4 4 4 ,i have been persuaded to try the ,semitic ,languages ,tripos4 ,i have been learning ,german and ,syriac a little this ,long with that aim in view4 4 4 4 ,i don't really know what to do4 ,i am trying to do what will best fit me for my future work4 ,it is hard to know what is right4 4 4 4 ,the only thing ,i want is not to develop into a mere bookworm4 4 4 4 ,the atmosphere of ,cambridge so tends to deaden one1 and to make one unsympathetic with humanity2 and yet the ,church today does so need men who know something1 men who can express with no uncertain sound the truth of ,old ,testament and ,new ,testament criticism4 ,i want so to find out what the ,old ,testament is1 and how far we can believe in it1 in its essential truth1 in its historical accuracy4 ,the question can only be settled by scholars--by scholars filled with the spirit of humility and understanding4 ,it cannot be settled by the so-called spiritual faculty alone1 but only by the intellect guided by the ,spirit of ,truth4 ,i have been reading ,st4 ,john's ,gospel in ,greek and ,syriac1 and more and more ,i become convinced #ee that what it says is truth3 zoe--life--anything worth calling life--anything that can last--anything that is of use here and hereafter--is to be gained alone by actually eating and drinking the ,body of the ,son of ,man4 ,the expression is awfully strong--the expression in itself4 ,i am not talking of all sorts of modern explanations of the expression4 ,take it as it stands in the original3 ',you have no life1 unless you eat and drink4 4 4 4' ,transcriber's note3 ,the word zoe in the above paragraph was transliterated from the ,greek letters zeta1 omega1 eta4 ,i wish there could be a small ,greek ,testament reading in the ,college for considering what the ,new ,testament really means1 apart from modern interpretations4 ,is it possible to find out the true1 original meaning of that book1 and to understand its problems a little and its solutions8 ',quid importat scientia sine timore ,dei8' ,to ,t4 ,h4 ,m4 ,aldeburgh ,house1 ,blackheath3 ,march #bj1 #ahia4 ,i am gradually finding out how ignorant ,i am of the meaning of the ,new ,testament1 and how miserably ,i have read my own miserable notions and glosses into the words of ,st4 ,paul4 ,i am sure that the solution of the greatest problems which concern humanity is to be found in his ,epistles1 if we could only approach them without bias and with more childishness4 ,i feel certain that the ,incarnation is the great fact of the world's1 and probably of the universe's1 history4 ',the ,word was made flesh4' ,and so the ,word had breath1 and wrought ,with human hands the creed of creeds ,in loveliness of perfect deeds1 ,more strong than all poetic thought4 #ef ,the death on ,calvary must have had effects far beyond this particular world4 ',he descended into hell4' ,he claimed ,his power over all parts of ,his universe4 ,the ,good has conquered4 ,the ,bad is defeated4 ,to ,t4 ,h4 ,m4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,july #ah1 #ahia4 ,we have but lately heard that my missionary brother#a has passed away into the eternal world4 ,he died in ,africa4 ,he gave up all1 he gave up his life for ,christ4 ,terribly as we feel the loss1 and shall feel it still more1 ,i cannot help thanking the ,eternal ,father that ,he has accepted the life-sacrifice1 and feeling that ,he calls upon us here and now1 each day and moment of our lives1 to offer up ourselves on the altar of universal thanksgiving4 ,life is sacrifice1 renunciation3 true life is dependence on ,god4 ,sin is isolation1 death--a failure to recognise and act on our dependence4 ,i do feel as ,i seldom felt before something of the love of the ,father1 the grace of the ,son1 the communion of the ,spirit4 ,we must learn that an individual hope1 aspiration1 ambition1 is against the law of the universe--the law of self-sacrifice4 ,we must learn that our wills are ours to make them ,god's2 that if we have a single hope or thought which ,he does not inspire1 which true humanity cannot share1 the hope and thought are wrong4 ,god grant that you and ,i may renounce #eg our individual lives1 and become truly ourselves by martyrdom1 by allowing the ,christ in us to live4 ,i am to be ordained in ,september4 ,pray for me4 ,there is no power like prayer4 ,let us pray for one another4 ,the great ,father longs for simple lives1 simple piety1 perpetual thanksgiving4 ,and we have so much to be thankful for--so much here and now4 ,i do long to offer body1 mind1 soul1 affections1 will1 hope1 to ,him as a thanksgiving4 ,self-renunciation1 life in a ,church1 a ,body1 is the only life4 ,god grant we may live it6 #a ,john ,alfred ,robinson1 formerly a scholar of ,christ's ,college1 who died at ,lokoja on the ,river ,niger1 on ,june #be1 #ahia4 ,to ,t4 ,h4 ,m4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,november #ag1 #ahia4 ,do you know that it isn't a bad thing to feel a babe8 ,we must all become simple little children before we enter the kingdom of heaven1 because ,god1 who lives in that kingdom1 has the simplest heart in all the wide universe--the most childlike1 for ,god is ,love4 ,he has no cross purposes4 ,though ,he is stronger and better and bigger than we are1 ,he is simpler4 ,he will love a poor1 simple old woman in ,his simple way with a wonderful affection4 ,he is so simple1 because ,he does not know what sin is4 ,god never sins4 ,god is ,light1 and in ,him is no darkness at all4 ,it is this simplicity1 this love of ,one who is omnipotent1 uncreate1 illimitable1 eternal1 that makes me reverence ,him1 adore ,him1 live for ,him1 love ,him4 ,simplicity is wonderfully attractive4 ,the man who knows least of sin is most helpful to me1 because #eh he is most simple and ,godlike4 ,the 'man of the world' is most repulsive1 because he is most like the ,devil4 ,to ,e4 ,n4 ,l41 on the occasion of his ordination4 ,cambridge3 ,march #aj1 #ahib4 ,it gives me great pleasure to think that on ,sunday next you will be made a ,deacon in ,god's ,church4 ,i thank ,god that ,he has called you to one of the highest offices on earth1 that henceforth you will be 'in' or 7shall we say87 'under' orders--,god's orders--that you willingly renounce your life1 your thoughts1 your hopes1 your ambitions to ,him4 ,you will probably hear much and be told much at this time4 ,i have nothing to say that you have not heard and will not hear said far better by others4 ,our ,church gives the keynote in the collect for ,sunday3 ',we have no power4' ,i never realised my weakness1 my pride1 my hollowness so much as ,i did at my ordination4 ,god has been teaching me1 even in the short time since ,i was ordained1 wonderful lessons--lessons of strength being perfected in weakness4 ,he alone knows the depths of our hypocrisy1 our vanity1 our atheism1 and ,he alone can help us4 ,to get nearer to ,him1 to know ,him better--this is what ,i want1 this is eternal life4 ,as we believe in a ,person who is by our side1 who is helping us1 training us1 we shall be able to proclaim ,him to others4 ,do not mind about feelings4 ,you may have beautiful feelings at your ordination time4 ,thank ,god if you have4 ,he sends them4 ,you may have none4 ,thank ,god if you have not1 for ,he has kept them back4 ,we do #ei not want to feel better and stronger2 we want to be better and stronger4 ,and ,he has made us better and stronger4 ,he has given us ,his ,spirit as we knelt before the bishop4 ,we must go forth in that strength4 ,we must use it1 live on it1 and it will be ours4 ,kata ten pistin humon genetheto humin4 ,when we feel most hopeless1 most wretched1 most distant from ,god1 remember 'feelings don't matter4' ,remember that ,god's ,son felt the same temptation1 remember that ,he too was forsaken by ,his ,god4 ,and when all seems lost1 ,satan seems master1 we are misunderstood2 remember that ',i believe in the ,holy ,ghost1' who is stronger than separation or death1 than feelings1 than our hearts4 ,all our feelings and thoughts and wishes are nothing4 ,god is everything and in all4 ,all our conceptions will be shattered1 all our schemes overthrown1 that a ,great ,person behind may be revealed4 ,to know1 to love1 to make known1 to make men love that ,person is our work in life 4 4 4 4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek words in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 ,kata--,kappa1 alpha1 tau1 alpha2 ten--tau1 eta1 nu2 pistin--pi1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 iota1 nu2 humon--7rough breathing mark7 upsilon1 mu1 omega1 nu2 genetheto--gamma1 epsilon1 nu1 eta1 theta1 eta1 tau1 omega2 humin--7rough breathing mark7 upsilon1 mu1 iota1 nu ,we are men sent from ,god4 ,we come to bear witness of a ,light4 ,do not let us confuse ourselves with our message4 ,the message is everything2 we are nothing4 ,the ,light simply shines through us4 ,we must be glad to be shattered1 rejected1 if so be that the ,light shining through us may be manifested4 ,one suggestion ,i make3 that you do what ,i believe you are expected by the words of the ,prayer-book to do--say the ,morning and ,evening ,prayer daily always1 unless you are ill1 at home or in church1 and the ,litany on ,wednesday1 ,friday1 and ,sunday4 ,you will find this a greater help than almost anything else--a help against superstition1 narrowness1 bigotry1 #fj heartlessness4 ,if you decide not to do so1 do it with some really good reason1 and not because others do the same1 or because it is a bother4 ,and now good-bye4 ,and may ,god grant us to know ,him on earth1 so that we may together know ,him better hereafter4 ,to ,w4 ,a4 ,b4 ,blackheath3 ,april #cj1 #ahib4 4 4 4 ,no amount of philosophical theories are worth much compared with a simple picture of home life4 ,it is these common relations of life which are most awful and sacred4 ,the highest life we know is1 ,i think ,i may say with reverence1 family life--life of ,father and ,son2 family life on earth is a faint picture of something better in heaven4 ,we shall be surprised some day to find that1 while we have been searching for the noble and divine1 we have it all the while at home4 ,the relations of brother and brother1 son and father1 are eternal realities1 which we shall never fathom1 for ,god ,himself is below them4 ',omnia exeunt in mysterium1' as ,kingsley says in ',yeast4' ,i am very pleased with that novel4 ,the description he gives of the sufferings and squalor of villages is positively awful4 ,we do want men who believe that self-sacrifice1 not selfishness1 is at the top of all1 who are sure that family life is made in heaven and is made in the image of ,god's life1 who know that in the present is the eternal1 to go and live and work and die in our villages4 ,but ,kingsley shows it is not enough to give alms or other social benefits--we must do more than that1 we must raise their whole #fa life and condition4 ,i believe myself that this can only be done from inside4 ,thus1 when ,god wished to redeem man1 ,he did it from inside4 ,man himself fought and conquered4 ,deity entered into humanity4 ,it is not merely that we must live simply1 think simply1 work1 as they do4 ,that is well1 but we must do more4 ,if we want to look at them from the inside1 ,i know only one way--the old1 old way which ,god ,himself adopts4 ,we must love them1 love the ,christ1 the ,spirit in them--not the beast1 the devil in them4 ,like attracts like4 ,to love and to detect that1 we must have some of that ,spirit1 that ,christ4 ,that means to say that to help others from the inside1 we must be right inside ourselves4 ,and yet none of us are right inside4 ,but there is that in us which is right1 that in us which is not ourselves1 but is deeper than ourselves4 ,a ,son who will make us true sons1 a ,brother who will teach us how to be brothers1 a ,human ,being who will show us what is in all human beings2 a ,love who will teach us what we always fancy we know1 but what we don't know 7else we should be divine7--how to love2 a ,man who will make us saints and gentlemen--the ,man ,christ ,jesus4 ,yes1 and there is in us a ,great ,spirit who is uniting us by invisible bonds to all that is good and healthy and ,godlike1 a ,spirit who disciplines our will when it is weakest and most self-indulgent1 who trains our spirit and fights our battles against the evil spirit1 a ,person who makes us persons4 ,how then do men differ8 ,if in every man there is the ,light which lightens him1 the ,christ1 the ,spirit1 what is the difference between good and bad men8 ,does #fb a good man possess religion1 or faith1 or love8 ,no1 the best men would tell you they were possessed by faith and love1 rather than that they possessed them4 ,what faith or love they have is not a possession--it is in them1 not of them1 not belonging to them4 ,it comes from the ,christ in them4 ,the difference between men is not that one is inspired and another is not1 but that one yields to the ,spirit1 another does not4 ,we begin to obey when we lose ourselves in that ,spirit and forget all but ,god4 ,we ought never to settle any detail in life without taking ,him into account3 we are fools if we do4 ,how can we be logical8 ,for ,he is in that detail1 and not to think of ,him is not to understand that detail4 ,for every detail is more than a detail--it is the expression of a ,person4 ,i have wandered into a train of thought suggested by ',yeast1' and in part copied directly from it4 ,forgive me4 ,i was half thinking aloud4 ,that is my one excuse for saying what ,i am trying to think4 ,i never played golf4 ,i do that sort of thing by deputy4 ,k---- is the sort of man to do it for me4 ,at any rate1 ,i trust him with my football and rowing4 ,it doesn't tire you so much if you do it that way4 ,only let me give you one piece of advice1 which ,i only wish ,i acted upon3 ',don't do your thinking by deputy3' do your rowing1 golf1 football1 cricket1 skittles1 talking if you like1 but not your thinking4 #fc ,to ,d4 ,d4 ,r2 written apropos of a discussion on ,st4 ,paul's idea of the relation between ,sin and the ,law4 #b ,new ,square1 ,cambridge2 ,monday before ,easter1 #ahib4 ,i cannot but help feeling that part of your difficulties are self-made4 ,is there such a difference between ,jewish law and law in general8 ,what is law--law in the abstract8 ,what do you mean when you talk about laws of science or morality8 ,surely there is no such thing as law in the abstract4 ,you really mean ,god's thought4 ,all law existed long before this world existed1 as the thought of ,god4 ,this thought expresses itself1 when the world is actually made1 in animals1 nature1 man4 ,but this thought is somewhat long before it expresses itself1 because it is ,god's thought4 ,with ,him 'to think' is 'to do4' ,before you and ,i were born1 before men were made1 man exists in ,god as a thought4 ,each of us is an expression of part of that thought4 ,the whole thought is the image of ,god1 not any one part4 ,now1 when ,i speak of man as something in contra-distinction to men1 ,i mean the thought of ,god in contradistinction to its individual realisation4 ,so when ,i speak of law as distinct from special laws1 ,i mean a thought of ,god as distinct from its special expressions4 ,otherwise 'man' and 'law' are abstractions and nonentities4 ,the nominalist is right in so far as he denies that law as an abstract thing 7considered apart from a person--as his thought7 is anything3 the realist is right in so far as he affirms that law1 apart from #fd any particular manifestation1 is an eternal reality4 ,the reconciliation of nominalism and realism is found in ,god4 ,applying this to the case in hand--you admit that the ,ten ,commandments are the ground of morality2 therefore1 ,i say1 they must be an expression of a thought of ,god1 the ,author of morality4 ,but you are puzzled to find that the most trivial sanitary arrangements are considered by the ,jew as equally a manifestation of ,god4 ,need we be8 ,in every little sanitary precaution ,i recognise1 or ought to recognise1 an expression of that same mind as ,i see it in the ,ten ,commandments4 ,god is ,light1 therefore the clean1 the healthy1 the decent is an expression of ,him4 ,god is ,love1 therefore the social1 the self-sacrificing1 is an expression of ,him as well4 ,but sanitary arrangements and the like1 though an expression of an unchanging principle1 change according to state of civilisation1 climate1 country4 ,therefore we take the principle1 not the expression1 as the ultimate reality in the case of these sanitary laws4 ,i am afraid ,i am rather stupid1 and cannot make my meaning plain4 ,i want to show you that the ,jewish law only differs from ,english law as being in some ways a more complete expression of ,god's nature4 ,but in all sanitary law1 c41 now we have ,god's nature expressed4 ,and it would be true to say1 ',god spake unto ,england1 saying'--e4g4 in a right decision in court2 it would be true to say1 ',god spake unto the judge1 saying4' ,therefore1 what holds good of ,moses' law holds good of all law1 because all law is a thought of ,god4 #fe ,therefore ,st4 ,paul uses indifferently nomos and ho nomos1 for what is true of ,god's thought is true of every expression of it4 ,in fact1 he more often perhaps argues about one particular expression of it4 ,why8 ,because we can only tell what the thought is by studying the expression4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek words in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 nomos--nu1 omicron1 mu1 omicron1 final sigma2 ho--7rough breathing mark71 omicron ,don't be taken in by abstractions4 ,an ideal is nothing--worse than nothing--unless our ideal is ,god's idea4 ,then it is the only reality1 because ,god's idea will take effect4 ,his idea is to make man in ,his image1 and be sure it will take effect4 ,commandments1 judgments1 statutes1 mean much the same in the ,old ,testament1 ,i conceive1 as we mean when we use them4 ,the ,ten ,commandments are not so called in the ,bible1 ,i think4 ,they are called 'words1' ,i think4 ,i do not think ,st4 ,paul at all restricted nomos to the ,ten ,commandments4 ,in fact1 ,i don't know that he ever very clearly separated those off from all the rest4 ,do not in your essay make the same mistake as many of the ,jews in ,st4 ,paul's time4 ,do not try to consider law apart from the ,law-giver4 ,they looked upon law as a dead thing by itself1 not as an expression of the character of a person4 ,thus the ,commandment about resting on the ,sabbath day was considered by them as an order as though from a tyrant4 ,but ,god1 when ,he gave it1 did not simply say1 ',here it is3 do it'--but ',do it because1' and ,he gives the reason why4 ,the reason is different in ,exodus and ,deuteronomy1 because the books were1 to a certain degree perhaps1 written to #ff illustrate different aspects of ,god's character4 ,exodus says3 ',work and rest1 because ,god's life is work and rest4 ,therefore human life made in ,his image is work and rest4' ,deuteronomy says3 ',work and rest4 ,god has emancipated you from slavery4 ,he bids you rest4' ,in both cases ,god is the ground of the law4 ,study law--any law--,english law--and in so far as it is law1 and not lawlessness under guise of law1 you will be studying ,god ,himself2 for if ,st4 ,paul's principles are true at all1 they must be true of all law4 ,but1 oh6 don't deal with abstractions1 which sound well1 but mean little4 ,let us use what we have4 ,it is a grand thing to know that the highest ideal we can conceive must be realised1 for the highest ideal must be part of ,god's idea4 ,don't try to look at moral law apart from national life4 ,st4 ,paul did not4 ,law is seen in national life4 ,a nation is a better expression of ,god than an individual1 because ,god is three1 not simply one4 ,he is a social ,being1 a ,being of relations4 ,and nations will last for ever4 ,law will always be seen worked out in national life4 ,god has more worlds than one4 ,each nation is a thought of ,god worked out in human clay 7cf4 ,jeremiah xviii4 #a-f74 ,human clay lasts for ever 7',i believe in the resurrection of the body'74 ,law will always be worked out thus4 ,we are part of a thought of ,god--part of an ,english nation--little fragments of a huge whole4 ,our immortality depends on the fact that we are parts of a nation1 parts of a ,divine idea1 which lasts for ever4 ,law is more completely seen in conscious than unconscious life1 because ,god's life is conscious4 ,law is more completely seen #fg in family and national than individual life1 because in ,god ,himself are seen the archetypes of human relations4 ,this letter is disjointed1 but contains a few thoughts which may prove helpful--thoughts ,i have been learning from others of late4 ,we are having lovely weather4 ,the buds 'feeling' after each other--new life and resurrection life--a type1 a pledge of fuller resurrection1 of ,easter life--nay1 the same ,life--',i am the ,resurrection and the ,life'--working in trees and flowers and man4 ,what a glorious thing to live in a world which has been united with its ,maker--a world of perfect law and order--a world where every infraction of law must and will be punished--a world where ,love is ,law and ,law is ,love--a world where a great thought is being realised1 and will be realised in and for us6 ,you use ',theology' loosely--',theology' is the thing and ',religion' is not1 ,i think1 nearly such a fine word4 ,theology is the ,learning1 ,knowing1 ,studying ,god4 ,i am sorry ,i have said nothing about ,jewish sacrificial law4 ,i meant to4 ,that expresses a great fact4 ,it dimly hints 7as sacrificial law in other nations does7 at the fact that the ground of the universe is self-sacrifice--that the ground of all human1 whether family or national1 life is a filial sacrifice4 ,i think other nations besides ,jews regarded all law as coming from ,god2 nay1 ,i think all nations did in part at least4 #fh ,to ,e4 ,n4 ,l41 on the occasion of the death of his brother1 who was killed by lightning at ,cambridge4#a ,june #ah1 #ahib4 4 4 4 ,i do feel for you1 and could do a great deal to help you4 ,i can only tell you what ,i have felt to be the only thing which makes life endurable at a time of real sorrow--,god ,himself4 ,he comes unutterably near in trouble4 ,in fact1 one scarcely knows ,he exists until one loves or sorrows4 ,there is no 'getting over' sorrow4 ,i hate the idea4 ,but there is a 'getting into' sorrow1 and finding right in the heart of it the dearest of all human beings--the ,man of ,sorrows1 a ,god4 ,this may sound as commonplace1 but it is awfully real to me4 ,i cling to ,god4 ,i believe ,he exists4 ,if ,he does not1 ,i can explain nothing4 ,if ,he does1 all whom we love are safer with ,him than with us4 ,if we can only get nearer ourselves to ,god1 we shall get nearer to those whom we love1 for they too are in ,god4 ,we shall be one1 ever more and more really one1 the nearer and the liker we get to ,god4 4 4 4 ,my dear friend1 words are poor comfort at a time like this1 when we see into eternity4 ,a ,person is our only hope1 and that ,person is ,god4 ,god often takes those whom ,he loves best home to ,himself as soon as ,he can4 ,in the process of their development they break through the bonds of space and time4 ,he has taken your brother1 but not taken him away from you4 ,we are #fi all in the same home--praying for1 knowing1 loving each other4 4 4 ,i believe in the communion of saints--,i believe that those who began to know ,god here1 and whom we call dead1 are not dead4 ,they are just beginning to live1 because they are finding out ,god3 they are just beginning to know us1 because they see us as we are--they see us in ,god4 ,they are with ,jesus1 and ,jesus is a human being4 ,because they are with a human being1 a man1 the man1 the ,son of man1 they must1 they do1 take a deep interest in the affairs of the sons of men1 and--may we not believe8--in us1 whom they knew below4 4 4 4 ,these are truths which sorrow helps me to make my own4 ,i pray that you may never1 never 'get over' the sorrow1 but get through it1 into it1 into the very heart of ,god4 #a ,writing to another friend at this time he says1 ',he was walking with a friend1 and in a moment1 without any apparent pain1 ,god's finger touched him and he slept4' ,to ,a4 ,w4 ,g4 ,blackheath3 ,june #bg1 #ahib4 ,i have more and more come to the conclusion for some time past that the only reality underlying and explaining the world must be personal4 ,i know that ,i am a person1 and that it is persons--especially a few particular persons--not things1 who have influenced me and had a power in my life4 ,all my ideas of justice and purity and goodness are inseparably bound up with persons4 ,at last ,i have come to the conclusion that nothing exists except the personal1 and that below all is ,one who is personal4 ,that means to say that the world and things in it are only real in so far as they are thoughts of ,god4 ,we are real only in so far as we are thoughts of ,god4 ,a #gj ,roman ,catholic poet1 speaking of the ,virgin ,mary1 says3 ,if ,mary is so beautiful1 ,what must her ,maker be8 ,i look round the world and ,i see persons who attract me in a wonderful way--persons who are more gracious and simple than ,i am2 and then ,i cannot help feeling that they all are a kind of faint picture of ,one who is better than all of them1 ,one in whose image they are made4 ,i like1 ,i cannot help liking1 intensely some of them2 and from them ,i am led on to ,him who made them and who therefore must--if ,i only knew ,him--be more attractive even than they are4 ,i believe that we are intended to rise from them to ,him who made them1 that if we stop short with the creature1 we lower ourselves--we become idolaters4 ,we worship beauty or intellect or goodness as though they belonged to the creature2 we thereby lower ourselves and the persons whom we worship4 ,if1 on the contrary1 we rise from them to the ,personal ,being1 we see more in them than we ever saw before1 and we get nearer to them than we ever got before4 ,for life is a circle whose centre is ,god4 ,each of us is unconnected with his neighbour1 but connected with the centre from whom he comes4 ,the nearer the centre1 the nearer we get to each other4 ,when we get to the centre1 we really become united with each other4 ,to die is to get a step nearer the centre4 ,the closer we are connected with the centre1 the nearer we are to those whom we call dead4 ,our communion with them is spiritual1 because ',god is spirit' and they are in ,him4 ,but the #ga spiritual is not the unsubstantial1 the nebulous1 the gaseous2 it is the personal--to my mind the awful--reality4 ,the more truly we understand persons1 the more we shall find they are spirits4 ,i tell you what has been the greatest possible strength to me of late4 ,god is not merely a ,person1 ,he is ,three ,persons in ,one4 ,i am always trying to get closer to those whom ,i love best1 to know them more1 to serve them better4 ,yet something is ever keeping us apart4 ,i said 'something1' ,i mean 'some one1' for only a person can keep a person from another--only a malicious1 a devilish person--yet ,i feel that some day ,i shall be able to love1 and know them better4 ,then ,i look out on life and ,i see how again and again death1 and some one worse than death1 is separating us1 misinterpreting motives1 keeping men apart2 men are struggling to be one1 and cannot be2 on earth persons long to be one1 persons who love feel they ought to be1 they must be one4 ,in heaven ,three ,persons are really1 perfectly1 quite ,one4 ,what we are trying to do has been done there4 ,men try to be one4 ,god is ,one4 ,and the comfort comes in when one knows that 'in the image of ,god made ,he man4' ,our life is a copy2 ,god's life is the original4 ,because ,god is ,one1 we1 whose life is a picture of ,his1 shall some day be one1 as ,he is4 ,the unity of ,deity is a pledge of the unity of humanity4 ,the more we make our life like the original the more shall we realise what we long to realise--truer1 deeper1 more eternal unity4 ,but we are not simply trying to be1 we are one4 ,all we have to do1 ,i believe1 is to act as though we were one4 ,we have #gb proofs of this unity4 ,we find ourselves doing an action which we should never have done unless we had known some one4 ,that one lives over his life1 or part of his life1 again in us4 ,so too we are living over our lives in other people1 perhaps in some who have passed into other worlds of fuller activity than this4 ,in living our lives over in each other1 we show that we are more than we thought2 and it is grand to think how big our lives may become in this way1 for those whom we influence--into whom our life flows in--in turn may influence others4 ,when ,i get quite quiet1 and my mind is sane1 and my conscience at rest1 when ,i almost stop thinking1 and listen1 ,i am quite sure that a ,personal ,being comes to me1 and1 as ,he comes1 brings some of ,his own life to flow into my life4 ,i am also sure that with ,him come those who live in ,him1 that all whom ,i have known or know1 and longed or long to know better1 who were worth knowing1 are near me1 are1 if ,i let them1 living their lives in my life1 making me what ,i should not be without them4 7,these are facts1 of which ,i think ,i may say ,i have more certainty in the best moments of my life than ,i have now that ,switzerland exists4 ,but ,i may be exaggerating4 ,perhaps as regards the second fact--of the other persons with ,him--,i may have spoken too strongly as regards my certainty4 ,it is so hard to say exactly what one means47 ,i don't know that these thoughts will be of much use to you4 ,they may sound somewhat too philosophical4 ,but ,i have more or less purposely put them in a philosophical form1 because we are not thus so #gc easily led astray into vague pleasant feelings1 which we sometimes get from rhetoric4 ,but ,i do wish ,i could put a little more of my feelings into this cold paper1 and cruel1 unsympathetic ink4 ,for what ,i have written is not a mere philosophy of life2 it is the only thing that makes life tolerable for a moment to me2 it is the one thing which ,i intensely long to realise4 ,to my mind life is love1 and love is life4 ,love is not sentimental affection1 simply the readiness to die for a person4 ,but love is the laying down of life for a person1 absolutely renouncing your life for another4 ,it means living the best life you can conceive of for the sake of one you love2 knowing for certain that your life is flowing into that other person1 though you may never see him again in this world4 ,love is purifying yourself that another may be pure4 ,love for one person1 if it be true love1 leads you at once to ,god1 for ',god is ,love4' ,i do not know what that means1 but ,i do know that the little meaning ,i can see in it explains everything4 ,as we love1 ,god is there2 we see ,god1 we are in ,god4 ,so we are led on from unselfish love on earth to that unselfish family life of ,three in ,one in heaven2 we are led on to ,him in whose image we are made1 and whose image we never so clearly reflect as when we love most4 ,i could go on talking on this subject almost for ever1 but ,i think ,i had better not tax your patience4 #gd ,to ,w4 ,a4 ,b4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,july #e1 #ahib4 ,how very jolly for you to get out right away into the country6 ,i hope some day to be able to do the same4 ,but ,i think1 on the whole1 ,i am better suited for retiring from the world than you are6 ,if it were right to wish it1 ,i might almost wish to exchange places with you4 ,but yet ,i don't4 ,it is very curious--,i dare say you have thought of it--how very1 very few people1 if any1 you would deliberately wish to change into1 if you could4 ,one admires many people1 and would like to have their goodness1 their intellect1 or their beauty or strength--but how few of them one would really be3 to cease at once to be yourself1 and suddenly to be some one else--to look at life with their eyes1 to have their past1 their hopes for the future1 their sins1 their inmost thoughts1 their anxieties4 ,there is only about one man in the world1 whom ,i know1 whom ,i would like to be--and even of that ,i am not sure4 ,it is the wonderful sense of personality4 ,we abuse 'me'2 we often vaguely say we would rather be some one else2 yet very few of us wish to lose 'me'3 and most of us perhaps never will4 ,liddon is1 ,i should think1 somewhat stiff and uninteresting4 ,gore's ,bampton ,lectures on much the same subject are far more interesting to my mind1 far more human4 ,lectures ,,iv1 ,v1 ,,vi of ,gore would perhaps interest and educate you on the subject4 ,are you so sure that your course at ,cambridge is 'over'8 ,i looked behind to find my past1 ,and lo1 it had gone before4 #ge ,you will find traces of that course1 before you have done1 in yourself and in others for good or for evil4 ,it is a good thing to think that nothing good is ever 'over'--that whatever we do is done for eternity1 is part of ourselves and of others--that we live on in others1 live on a nobler life than we lived in ourselves4 ,when we influence another1 our life flows into another3 we live our life over again in him4 ,the day will come when we shall see more clearly into what we have been doing4 ,as yet we are like children playing with knives3 they little know how near they are to killing themselves at times4 ,so we are playing with big issues3 we call them small and secular1 we treat them as such--yet every speck of dust is big with infinity4 ,would that we could see the ,infinite ,being at every turn1 then we should begin to live4 ,you will get wrong in all your plans unless you see them in ,him1 and ,him in them1 and correct them as you see them thus--correct your thoughts to fit in with ,his thoughts1 not ,his thoughts to fit in with your thoughts4 ,but you'll learn it is true4 ,you'll understand later on why ,i am always talking about a ,person2 why to know that ,personal ,being is life4 ,meanwhile1 thank you very1 very much for what you have taught me4 ,i feel ,i am down in the bottom class of that school1 but ,i am glad that ,i have got into the school at all4 ,later on ,i may reach a higher standard1 and know the ,teacher better4 ,in that school the lesson each of us is set to learn is love1 and the name we are all trying to spell out is the name of the ,father and of the ,son and of the ,holy ,spirit4 ,some of us1 perhaps1 have learnt to spell one part of the name1 #gf some of us another4 ,but none of us have properly learnt to love one single person as we ought2 and few of us have learnt to see the ,father's love in all1 the ,son's grace in all1 and the ,spirit's fellowship in all4 ,but patience must have her perfect work3 and if we work hard at our lessons1 we shall know more1 love more1 think in a simple way1 and do more4 ,but we must not be learning merely from each other2 the pupils must look away to the ,master of all in the centre1 and as we all learn from ,him and love ,him1 we shall be more modest1 there will be no competition--save who can love most and sacrifice most--and do most for ,him who has done all for us4 ,this letter is hurried4 ,forgive it4 ,write again4 ,accept the will for the deed4 ,think1 think1 think6 ,to ,t4 ,h4 ,m4 ,ivy ,house1 ,holkham3 ,september #a1 #ahib4 ,the sacraments are tremendous realities to me1 just because they are a living protest against all ,popish1 ,high ,church1 ,low ,church schemes of thought--because they are a protest that man does nothing1 ,god does all--that everything is a sacrament of the grace of ,god4 ,they explain all life to me4 ,they teach me what love means1 for when man might least expect it1 love comes deluging in1 and the outward and visible is overwhelmed with the inward and spiritual4 ,oh1 if bread and wine and water are capable of being transformed into the highest means of grace and hopes of glory2 may not living1 human1 breathing persons--may not those #gg ,i love--be sacraments as well8 ,when we come near human beings we love1 we should come with the same feelings of reverence as when we kneel at that altar1 for we are coming to that which is part of ,god's image--made in ,his likeness4 ,and as we speak to them1 when they answer purely and simply1 the ,word of ,god speaks through them4 ,this is not degrading the sacraments--nay1 but raising all human life--nay1 raising the sacraments as well1 for it brings them into relation with real life1 and transforms the poor magical abstractions into eternal realities4 ,to ,w4 ,a4 ,b41 who had told him that he had made up his mind to take up school work till he was old enough to be ordained4 ,holkham3 ,september #c1 #ahib4 ,a home circle reminds me1 ,i think1 more than anything else of that other home1 that other family--the home of a ,father and of a ,son1 the family circle of the ,three who live in one unity4 ,we should thank ,god for every family circle on earth into which we are allowed to enter1 and in whose life ,he allows us to share--for any true family on earth--yes1 and every little child who is born into this strange world of ours is a sure and certain pledge--a real sacrament--that ,god loves us still1 has not forgotten us1 is giving us little glimpses into ,his own family life1 is making existence here a more perfect image of life in heaven4 ,we should come into such a family circle with the same feelings of awe as when we bend on our knees to receive the ,holy ,communion4 ,for here1 too1 we enter into ,holy ,communion--the #gh communion of simple1 human1 happy family life2 here1 too1 we approach a sacrament1 outward and visible signs of happy1 quiet1 home life--the signs of an inward and spiritual grace--the grace which lies below and interprets all human grace in man and woman--the grace of our dear ,lord and ,saviour ,jesus ,christ4 ,true1 that grace is but little realised in the best of families--little consciously realised in the noblest life4 ,but1 oh6 surely a human family--brothers and sisters in a home on earth--are a sure and certain pledge that this grace does exist--that ,god is--for here we have an exquisite though imperfect copy of the family life of ,god4 ,thank ,god when you see a good or a beautiful man or woman1 a pure and a simple family--thank ,god1 because it is a revelation1 a manifestation1 an unveiling1 a copy1 a likeness of ,himself4 ,for though beauty often is proud and trivial1 yet it is a manifestation of ,him from whom all beauty comes1 in whom all beauty dwells1 by whom all beauty exists4 ,and so not only thank--pray4 ,pray to ,him that the outward and visible may be ever more and more but an expression of something inward and unseen and spiritual4 ,for beauty1 grace1 intellect1 everything is doomed1 unless it is sacramental--unless it draws its life from ,god below1 unless it lives but to testify of ,him who is4 ,it is an awful problem--a beautiful face with no true moral beauty below--splendid physical grace with no deeper grace beneath--a strong1 capable intellect which is not the expression of a noble soul4 ,what does it all mean8 ,how in a world1 where the outward and visible is but a manifestation of the #gi good ,god1 can such awful anomalies exist8 ,partly it is due to the law that goodness is rewarded to a thousand generations 7,exodus xx4 #f4 ,r4,v4 margin1 cf4 ,deut4 vii4 #i71 while wickedness is visited upon the third and fourth--that is1 that one who is beautiful in body or intellect1 and who knows ,god1 leaves the blessing of such beauty long after him to descendants who are little conscious of the reason of its origin1 and who have little thought of ,god4 ,beautiful eyes1 where there is no beauty of soul beneath1 are the eyes of others1 long since dead1 looking at us still--men who served ,god in their generation4 ,an exquisitely touching voice1 where there is no music in the life of the one who possesses it1 may be the voice of one who knew ,god1 and left his legacy for a thousand generations4 ,but still the problem remains4 ,in many cases the outward and inward seem divorced4 ,now let us not try rashly to solve the problem ourselves4 ,we are inclined when we see such beauty to say1 ',it is no use talking4 ,i am quite sure1 whatever you say1 that there must be some fine traits in the character of one whose face is like the face of an angel1 whose voice is sweeter than that of the sons of men4' ,we may be1 ,i believe we are1 partly right--at least in many cases1 for the spiritual powers of those who are gone may still in part live on in their descendants4 ,but often1 if we are candid1 we must admit that apparently the outward and visible are separated from the inward and spiritual1 that we have outward beauty and grace which is no sign at all of anything deeper--nay1 that the very spiritual qualities1 of which it is the sign1 #hj and which may once have existed in the person1 have been used for the vilest ends4 ,this being the case1 we are still left with the problem1 ,is the outward and visible not intended to be a sign of something deeper8 ,here it is not a sign4 ,why not8 ,will it ever be so8 ,to put the case in its short1 simple1 concrete form1 how can a 'flirt' exist when by all the laws of the universe beauty should surely be a sign not of instability1 insipidity1 unspirituality1 worldliness1 shallowness1 hypocrisy1 but of the ,supreme8 ,i cannot answer this question4 ,i doubt whether any man can4 ,but ,i can show you where its ultimate solution must lie4 ,it lies in the sacraments4 ,yes1 they are the answer to the whole problem4 ,they tell us that the outward and visible--the commonest objects1 water1 wine1 bread--may be the signs of something which is deeper than anything we know4 ,and they tell us more4 ,they are to my mind a sure and certain pledge that some day the outward and visible shall really correspond to the inward and invisible4 ,for1 remember1 this world lasts for ever4 ,the good lasts1 and is purified by fire4 ,the evil alone is consumed4 ,the sacraments are a pledge to me that some day upon this world our longings after a correspondence of the inward with the outward will be fulfilled--how1 ,god only knows--probably not in the way we expect1 but in a way far1 far better4 ,for ,his thoughts are not our thoughts1 and ,his ways are not our ways4 ,when therefore you are utterly bewildered and perplexed by finding so much that is attractive which seems utterly divorced from ,god's life2 when you find yourself that the outward and #ha visible in your own life--the words you say1 the actions you do1 tend to become absolutely different from your real inward life2 when you feel that every one is a hypocrite1 and you are the worst of all1 kneel down at that wonderful service1 and take what is the one power of making outward and inward correspond1 of making our words a true index of our thoughts1 our actions a true presentation of our lives2 kneel down and pray that all you love may enter more and more into the meaning of that service1 that they too may flee from self to ,one who is stronger than self--to the power which is capable of transforming our actions--to the power which raised ,christ from the dead1 and is capable of raising us up also4 ,then you will gradually be taught that all life is of the nature of a sacrament--that all food is to be taken because thereby we have health and strength to manifest forth the grace of ,god in a too often graceless world--you will be taught lessons which ,i cannot even suggest2 for ,god knows so much more than any of us what unsearchable riches ,he has as an inheritance for us4 ,let us enter upon that inheritance4 ,god has called us to be saints1 called us1 chosen us--chosen us before the world was made--,he has chosen us that in us1 through us1 ,he might manifest ,himself4 ,it is not humility that prevents us recognising the fact4 ,it is our selfishness and stupidity4 ,for the very fact that ,he has called and chosen you and me and all ,his ,church before we were born shows that everything comes from ,him4 ,we are utterly worthless and vile1 but when united1 as we are united to ,god1 we are transformed into ,his #hb image1 we partake of ,his life4 ,only let us be what we are--sons of ,god4 ,in regard to those words1 ',i looked behind to find my past1 and lo it had gone before1' ,i do not know whether you are right or wrong about the ,greek idea4 ,the past has gone before us1 we are always coming upon it4 ,some day we shall be confronted with it4 ,every day that we live we are making something that we shall meet again4 ,the only way to get unity into our lives--to make it possible to look back without sentimental repining or an awful sense of dread--is to get ,god as the centre1 ,god as the foundation4 ,as we look back then we shall find days 'linked each to each by natural piety'--we shall see that our life forms a connected whole a real progress1 something worth calling life4 4 4 4 ,do you know that the best way to strengthen your best thoughts is to try and express them8 ,get them out2 you help others1 you help yourself4 ,don't be careful of the grammatical accuracy and the finish of your sentences2 ,i don't think ,st4 ,paul was4 ,i was thinking to-day that perhaps a man who never wrote letters never could appreciate ,st4 ,paul4 ,he was a great letter-writer4 ,copy him4 ,read him4 ,read him fairly quickly4 ,get into him4 ,find out his motive power1 his real meaning4 ,read the ,greek1 not from a critical point of view only1 but read the ,greek4 ,do not trouble too much about the dictionary and accurate translations1 but keep reading and perhaps saying aloud the ,greek4 ,st4 ,paul knew so much of ,god4 ,read him1 and as you read1 a greater than ,st4 ,paul will come into you1 interpret #hc him1 explain him4 ,st4 ,paul himself will be with you1 ,i think1 trying to show you what he meant1 and what he has found out that he means now4 ,but do write me a proper letter4 ,we are just beginning life1 and we have so much to learn from and to teach each other4 ,everything is new to us4 ,everything is strange4 ,already it seems to me ,i have been trained in a hard school--harder1 ,i hope1 than you will ever need to be trained in--to understand what ,god and love mean4 ,i seem to have had a rough time of it1 perhaps rougher than most2 and even now ,i am trained in a way which is not attractive to me1 trained to throw myself not on any merely human love1 but on ,him who is perfectly human and perfectly divine4 ,may ,god train you in a less rough school1 if possible6 ,but at any rate1 may ,he train you--train you to get out of self1 bring you into deeper sympathies1 stronger attachments1 simpler earnestness6 ,he alone can give unity to all our thoughts and desires4 ,he alone can give stability4 ,and we poor little creatures1 who seem to have twice as much affection as we have mind1 how we do need that stability6 ,we want not to be blown hither and thither by every manifestation of strength1 beauty1 brain--we want to be able to enter into the meaning of what we see and cannot help admiring1 without becoming the slaves of the visible and the finite4 ,we must build on the one foundation that is laid4 ,we must lay our affections deep down in the man ,christ ,jesus4 ,as we see ,him in men--and1 when we cannot see that1 see men in ,him--we shall be more stable1 less childish1 less fickle4 ,we never go deep enough4 ,we skim over #hd life4 ,we must get into its heart4 ,we must never begin an affection which can have an end4 ,for all affection must draw us into ,god1 and ,god has no end4 ,the moment we see any one whose strength1 grace1 goodness1 beauty1 or simplicity attracts us1 we have deathless duties by that person4 ,for the attraction is the outward sign of a spiritual connection--a sign that we ought to pray for that person1 to thank ,god for the manifestation of ,his character1 which we see in a riddle1 through a glass in that life1 that human life4 ,and then we shall be prepared to realise deeper relationships1 more wonderful mysteries of love--to see with clearer eyes the heart of the ,supreme4 ,we cannot make relationships too spiritual4 ,we cannot be too careful to see them in ,god and ,god in them4 ,think what it is to see a relationship in ,god1 to see it existing there in ,his life1 as ,his thought1 long1 long before we were born1 long before we had an idea that we were intended to realise it4 ,what a new light on old relationships--brother and brother1 brother and sister1 father and child1 husband and wife1 all thoughts of ,god1 all being gradually entered into1 appropriated1 realised1 understood1 worked out by us4 ,they seem so common and natural1 and yet they are intensely awful and sacred and mysterious4 ,and then think what it is to see ,god in them--to see ,one from whom all family life flows1 penetrating those whom we have never properly learnt to love and those whom we love as much as we can4 ,god in them--all that is good and attractive--not their own1 but ,god's4 ,the eyes which seem to be #he contemplating something which we cannot see1 the face which lights up at times with another than human light2 the eyes1 the face1 a realisation and expression of that ,being who is at once human and divine1 ,god and man4 ,why1 this is bringing heaven down to earth1 this is a realisation in part of the holy city coming down from heaven4 ,for as we think of them1 above all as we pray for them1 we are led beyond them1 we forget our own selfish interests in them1 we are brought out from the 'garden' life of individual souls into the 'city' corporate life of a great human society1 a family1 the ,church of ,god4 ,we should live1 we should die for ,christ and ,his ,body--the ,church--the fulness of ,his life1 who is filling all in all4 ,we must cease thinking and praying for ourselves and for others1 as though we were alone4 ,we are all part of one great society4 ,around us--nay1 in us--are others1 some whom we can see1 some who in the course of development have burst the bonds of space and time and matter1 all one1 one1 for ever one4 ,we all have one common ,lord1 one common hope1 one common life1 one common enemy1 one common ,saviour1 who is working through us1 in us1 in those whom we least understand1 in those in whom we should least expect it1 in those who are almost repulsive to us1 in all--working out one big purpose through the ages1 the purpose of the ,eternal4 ,remember me at my ordination as priest1 please4 ,remember me1 for ,i need it so much1 you do not know how much4 ,it is such an important time1 and ,i cannot understand or enter into its significance1 as ,i long to do4 ,discipline1 discipline1 discipline1 #hf self-discipline--obedience to 'orders4' ,oh6 how ,i long to have the power to realise these6 ,pray for me that ,i may2 that you may1 pray also4 ,be very strict with yourself4 ,compel yourself to obey rules4 ,you are hurting so many besides yourself when you are not strict with yourself4 ,for we are 'one body4' ,you are injuring those whom you like best1 for you have less power over them1 when you have less power over yourself--less power to influence1 to pray1 to thank for them4 ,do remember how marvellously sacred a schoolmaster's work is3 it is not enough to be able to play games--how ,i sometimes wish ,i could6--it is not enough to be able to teach ,latin and ,greek3 a schoolmaster should be so much more4 ,he represents the authority of ,god4 ,he can be so much1 he may be so little to boys4 ,we can never enter into a boy's life1 into his deepest thoughts1 his 'long1 long thoughts1' unless we too become little children1 unless we become young and fresh and simple--and all young life comes from ,him1 who makes all the little children who ever come into this big world4 ,let us enter into ,his life4 ,do not become a schoolmaster simply to fill up time1 to have something to do4 ,to ,w4 ,a4 ,b4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,november #bj1 #aijb4 4 4 4 ,i am glad that you like your school1 that you like your boys4 4 4 4 ,think of the weak chaps1 those who are 'out of the way1' those who are not naturally #hg attractive1 those who positively repel you4 ,they often most need your sympathy1 your prayers4 ,and now about your ordination4 ,do you know ,i am doubtful whether it would be a good thing for you to be ordained to a school chaplaincy4 ,i am almost more than doubtful4 ,you would1 ,i suppose1 have no parish work1 nor anything to do with poor folk4 ,your work would be reading prayers1 and preaching about three times a year1 ,i suppose4 ,you would scarcely care to be a curate in a country or poor town parish later on1 would you1 if you began thus8 ,but1 after all1 ,i must not1 ,i dare not1 advise you4 ,i can only point you to the ,being who alone can advise us4 ,the great thing is to renounce all plans1 all thoughts of self1 to give up all we are and expect to be1 to come into ,his presence1 and then to ask ,his advice4 ,or rather we must come to ,him like little helpless children and ask ,him to help us to renounce planning and arranging with self as goal--to beg ,him to give us strength to give up all4 ,the great thing is to get the life where we shall develop best all our powers--viz4 the life in which we shall have most opportunities of sacrifice4 ,can you get1 can you use1 opportunities of self-sacrifice in your school life8 ,can you get fuller and better elsewhere8 4 4 4 ,of course1 if you find that you have more influence over boys than you would be likely to have over other folk1 that might alter the case4 ,have you found that you can influence them more for good than you would be likely to influence others8 ,our one work in life must be to advance ,god's glory1 ,god's kingdom4 ,the time is short4 ,the night #hh soon comes4 ,the great problem is how to do most in that short time2 how we ourselves can best lose ourselves in the little time that we have for losing ourselves4 ',he that loseth himself1 findeth himself4' ,to ,d4 ,d4 ,r4 #ad ,st4 ,margaret's ,road1 ,st4 ,leonards2 ,january #aj1 #ahic4 ,i have been thinking to-day of that strange statement ',i no longer call you slaves 4 4 4 but ,i have called you friends4' ,to understand any one you must be their friend3 you are able then to judge their life from the inside1 to see why and how they do what they do2 all their actions which seemed disconnected and purposeless before are seen to be part of a plan1 to have an end1 a goal4 ,we cannot understand the riddle of life1 the necessity of all the details in the great scheme of redemption1 the reason for certain means of grace1 the real significance of the hope of glory1 while we are slaves4 ,the whole appears so purposeless1 such waste of energy1 such unintelligible and irrational self-sacrifice4 ,why must the ,christ suffer8 ,why could not sin be overcome in a less costly way8 ,why is the victory of the ,christ so incomplete8 ,why do some1 who are better than we1 take so little interest in the eternal8 ,we cannot answer these and a thousand other questions while we are slaves4 ,all is a hopeless enigma1 a play without a plot1 a novel with no plan4 ,but become a friend of a man and all is changed4 ,each act in his life1 each thought in his life1 each word from his lips--they have not ceased to be a problem1 #hi they are ten thousandfold more wonderful than they ever were before3 they are still a problem2 but there is1 there must be1 we feel1 a purpose running through the whole4 ,we have but one object--to understand him more1 to see what divine ideal he is trying to work out in all the details of his common life4 ,each detail is important2 each thought1 however wayward1 must be recognised and understood4 ,all are seen in the clear1 dry light of eternity2 each is seen in something like its right proportion4 ,we feel that his life is our life--nay1 more interesting than our own miserable life--that if we are ever to know ourselves we must know him first4 ,so1 too1 become a friend of ,him who alone is1 and all is changed4 ,gradually1 perhaps painfully1 yet surely1 as we become like very little children1 the meaning of the whole dawns upon us4 ,we see it all3 we see that it could not be otherwise3 we cannot say why1 but we are quite sure that we see it--at least1 we see a little way1 and where the light ends and it begins to get dark1 we feel that it is all right beyond--that ,he who is with us in the light will be with us in the darkness4 ,we are no longer slaves1 doing ,his will because we must4 ,we are friends1 and we cannot help taking deep interest in all that ,he does4 ,his acts1 ,his thoughts1 ,his words1 they are still a problem--we cannot make them all out4 ,but they are the same kind of problem as a friend is--a strange exquisite torture4 ,we do not know what the whole of his life means2 he can do things which we cannot1 and which we rejoice to know that we can never do4 ,we only see one side of him ever1 and the rest is only known to ,god4 #ij ,and yet we do know part of his life1 and we are content to know no more2 what we know is good1 and what we do not know or understand must also be good4 ,we judge from what we see what that must be which we cannot see4 ,we do not wish it otherwise4 ,we feel that it would be impious to try and understand him fully1 for is he not connected with ,god ,himself8 ,so we see one side of the life of the ,eternal2 but we are friends2 we do not wish it otherwise4 ,we cannot understand ,him--we never can4 ,and yet ',i have called you friends4' ,his main purposes we see3 the plan by which ,he realises them we see in part4 ,and as we know ,him better1 we shall be able to track ,his footsteps even where we did not expect to find ,him4 ,we shall learn that ,his methods are simpler and better than ours1 that ,his thoughts are surer1 deeper1 higher than all our schemes and plans4 ,i am constantly finding that ordinances1 customs1 beliefs1 which ,i used to despise as strange1 antiquated1 or useless1 are yet the very ones which ,i need1 that my fathers knew better than ,i my needs1 that above all ,god ,himself had provided institutions and customs1 and had waited until ,i was old enough to learn their use and to bless ,him as ,i used them4 ,so1 as we know a man better1 we feel that we must pray for him and his the more4 ,as we become the friends of the ,word1 we feel we must pray that ,his will may be done ever more and more--,his purposes realised by us and ours4 ,let us then not begin by criticising the world and ,god2 let us first be the friends of ,god1 and then in the light of undying friendship and prayer begin to criticise4 #ia ,we must be the friend of a man before we understand his life2 we must be the friends of ,jesus ,christ before we understand ,his life now upon earth4 ,i used to skate3 ,i don't now4 ,i obey herein one of the great maxims of my life3 ',if you want to get a thing well done1 don't do it yourself4' ,i consider that ,k----1 in this as in other similar pursuits1 performs the ancient and 'sacred duty of delegation4' ,i have no doubt that he does it admirably4 ,why must people try what they can't do well8 ,why not leave it to those who like it and can do it well8 ,the wretched public-school-boy conception of dull uniformity is an abomination to me6 ,if ,k---- does the walking1 you do the thinking2 ,g---- does the dandy1 ,m---- the grumbling1 ,s---- the jack-in-the-box1 ,g---- the running1 ,m---- the philosopher1 and ,d---- the little vulgar boy--allow me to do what after all is the hardest of all tasks1 'to do nothing gracefully4' 7,i am afraid that ,i begin by trying 'to do nothing--gracefully1' but end by 'doing nothing gracefully4' ,you see the difference67 ,i believe in division of labour--let each man do what he is made to do best--and those who feel their vocation to be nothing but receiving the results of the labour of others--why1 let them try to do it with the best grace they can6 ,forgive me if such be my case4 ,to ,j4 ,l4 ,d4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,may #ae1 #ahic4 ,i think you are right in believing in the intense worth of sympathy4 ,but 'sympathy' is the ,greek #ib as 'compassion' is the ,latin form of 'suffering together with4' ,he who has suffered most has perhaps the most power to sympathise2 not simply to pity or console1 but to go right out of self and to get right into another1 to see life with his eyes1 to feel as he feels4 ,if1 then1 you find many of those among whom your lot is cast almost incapable of sympathy1 may it not be that they have not yet learned the meaning of suffering8 ,they may not have had so many opportunities of suffering as you1 or1 if they have had as many1 they may not have found any one to interpret to them what it all meant4 ,thank ,him from whom all sympathy comes if you have known anything of the sufferings of life1 anything of the worries and disappointments and delays and unsatisfied ambitions which so many have2 if you have known these--known their inner meaning1 and have been led out and beyond your own into that wider life of suffering1 and have learned what it is to fill up in your turn ta husteremata ton thlipseon tou ,christou4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the above ,greek phrase was transliterated as follows3 ta--tau1 alpha2 husteremata--7rough breathing mark7 upsilon1 sigma1 tau1 epsilon1 rho1 eta1 mu1 alpha1 tau1 alpha2 ton--tau1 omega1 nu2 thlipseon--theta1 lambda1 iota1 psi1 epsilon1 omega1 nu2 tou--tau1 omicron1 upsilon2 ,christou--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 upsilon ,one hates to see others whose centre is self4 ,their whole life looks so mean and low4 ,life over1 the ,ego alone left2 and what a poor1 wretched1 snivelling creature after all--this what we pampered1 this what we thrust forward for others to admire and flatter6 ,if we were not in much the same case1 we might be able to view it in others with somewhat different eyes4 ,and yet do you know that1 as a matter of fact1 our ,ego is dead--self is not--and the devil's greatest lie is to make us believe in this self8 ,for do not you and ,i belong to ,one stronger than #ic self--,one whose own self may live in us--does live in us--whether we recognise the fact or not8 ,we died years ago to self when ,he claimed us for ,himself1 and we rose again to a selfless life in ,him3 zo de ouketi ego1 ze de en emoi ,christos4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the above ,greek phrase was transliterated as follows3 zo--zeta1 omega2 de--delta1 epsilon2 ouketi--omicron1 upsilon1 kappa1 epsilon1 tau1 iota2 ego--epsilon1 gamma1 omega2 ze--zeta1 eta2 de--delta1 epsilon2 en--epsilon1 nu2 emoi--epsilon1 mu1 omicron1 iota2 ,christos--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 final sigma ,we act a lie whenever we make our ,ego instead of ,his ,ego the centre4 ,if ,he is our centre and our goal1 then be sure our ,ego will begin to live1 because it is 'grounded' and rooted in ,his4 ,any trouble and anxiety that leads you out of self to the ,infinite ,ego1 that makes you feel helpless and lonely and in need of a ,human ,helper and a ,human ,comforter1 thank ,god for it4 ,he is teaching you to cast yourself upon ,one who is perfectly human because perfectly divine4 ,he is teaching you that you are not your own2 that long1 long ago yourself died3 ei oun sunegerthete to ,christo1 ta ano zeteite4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the above ,greek phrase was transliterated as follows3 ei--epsilon1 iota2 oun--omicron1 upsilon1 nu2 sunegerthete--sigma1 upsilon1 nu1 eta1 gamma1 epsilon1 rho1 theta1 eta1 tau1 epsilon2 to--tau1 omega2 ,christo--chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omega2 ta--tau1 alpha2 ano--alpha1 nu1 omega2 zeteite--zeta1 eta1 tau1 epsilon1 iota1 tau1 epsilon ,thus we are led to understand something of the meaning of our ,christian names--to see that they are living pledges to us1 whatever we do1 wherever we go--that ,christ's name is called upon us--that when tiny little children we were brought home to the ,great ,ego in whom alone our ,ego can ever find satisfaction--to feel that we are ,his and ,he is ours4 ,to ,j4 ,l4 ,d4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,october #i1 #ahic4 ,the step which you contemplate taking is one with far-reaching issues--reaching away through time and beyond it4 ,i advise you to try and gain a general idea of the meaning of the first half of ,st4 ,paul's #id second letter to the ,corinthian ,church--to try and enter into its general spirit4 ,few things will humble you more3 you will see something of the unspeakable dignity of the office of him who represents ,god to his fellow-men1 and of the tremendous enthusiasm and love which a man must have if he would be the minister that ,st4 ,paul would have him be4 ,i do not know what ,st4 ,paul means when he says that we are ambassadors on behalf of ,christ3 but the more ,i think of what the words seem to mean1 the more ,i am startled at the awful responsibility that we have laid upon us4 ,to represent ,christ1 to treat with men1 to attempt to arrange--if one may so speak--terms1 to use all our powers in performing the work of the embassy--this at least is involved in the words4 ,what strikes me so much in the letter is the manner in which ,st4 ,paul literally loves the ,church2 how he longs to communicate his own enthusiasm to it2 how he would die1 almost does die1 himself to bring life to them4 ,all his hopes are bound up with theirs--his salvation with their salvation4 ,he seems to 'fail from out his blood1 and grow incorporate' into them4 ,we are called to the same office as ,st4 ,paul1 we have the same power working in us as he had working in him3 we too shall have success in so far as we love--as we identify ourselves with those whom ,god has given us to take care of4 ,the more we are disciplined and yet enthusiastic1 the more capable shall we be of love--of getting out of self--of working our way into others--of representing the ,christ to them--of understanding and making allowances for them--of seeing them in the ideal1 the only real1 light in #ie which ,god sees them--seeing them in the ,christ1 in whom we live--mind that1 with all your intellectual training1 you don't forget the other4 ,now is the time to learn1 to force yourself to learn1 to pray--to pray not for a few minutes at a time1 but to pray for an hour at a time--to get alone with yourself--to get alone with your ,maker4 ,we shall not have to talk so much to others if we pray more for them4 ,we talk and we do not influence1 or we influence only for a time1 because our lives are not more prayer-full4 ,to ,j4 ,l4 ,d4 ,aldeburgh ,house1 ,blackheath1 ,s4,e43 ,december #af1 #ahic4 ,i cannot help thinking of you both at this time4 ,it means so much to you both--more than either of you dreams that it means4 ,the issues of your ,ordination day are very far reaching indeed4 ,they stretch away and beyond this world in which we now are4 ,the rush of school work and of preparation for examination has probably not left you as much time as you could have wished for thinking over what it all means4 ,i hope you will have more time after the service is over4 ,but you may be comforted in the thought that the last few years have been a definite preparation for your life-work4 ,though you must regret1 as you never regretted before1 misuse of time and powers in the past1 yet you have had an education which has in some degree prepared you for this time1 an education for which you may thank our common ,master4 ,but this #if thought by itself would be but a small comfort4 ,for you must feel1 if you are the man ,i take you for1 how unworthy you are to be what you are called to be4 ,now there are two ways of dealing with this feeling4 ,you may say1 ',i am not called to be an absolute saint2 but ,i will try to reach a fairly high standard2' or you may say1 ',yes1 ,i am called to be an absolute saint4 ,i will not lower my ideal4 ,i will comfort myself with that single word called4 ,if ,he has called me1 ,he will do in me and for me what ,he wills4' ,this second way is the true way of dealing with feelings of unworthiness and unfitness4 ,you and ,i are utterly unfit4 ,but we are both called--called from our mother's womb--called to be saints and to be ministers4 ,he who called us will help us4 ,with man the call seems quixotic1 impossible2 with ,him all things are possible4 ,at times when the call is loudest we can but reply1 ',ah6 ,lord1 ,i am but a little child4' ,we are intensely conscious of feebleness and1 what is worse1 of treachery and meanness within2 we half love what we are called upon to denounce2 we play with the sin we are to teach men to abhor4 ,yet the call is sure1 is definite1 is perpetual1 and again and again you will in all probability find what a help it is to look back to that day in which the call took formal shape4 ,you have that as a definite fact to rest upon1 to reprove1 to encourage1 to urge to renewed effort1 to force you to be true and energetic4 ,one thing you must learn to do4 ,whatever you leave undone you must not leave this undone4 ,your work will be stunted and half developed unless you #ig attend to it4 ,you must force yourself to be alone and to pray4 ,do make a point of this4 ,you may be eloquent and attractive in your life1 but your real effectiveness depends on your communion with the eternal world4 ,you will easily find excuses4 ,work is so pressing1 and work is necessary4 ,other engagements take time4 ,you are tired4 ,you want to go to bed4 ,you go to bed late and want to get up late4 ,so simple prayer and devotion are crowded out4 ,and yet1 ,t----1 the necessity is paramount1 is inexorable4 ,if you and ,i are ever to be of any good1 if we are to be a blessing1 not a curse1 to those with whom we are connected1 we must enter into ourselves1 we must be alone with the only source of unselfishness4 ,if we are of use to others1 it will chiefly be because we are simple1 pure1 unselfish4 ,if we are to be simple1 pure1 unselfish1 it will not be by reading books or talking or working primarily1 it will be by coming in continual contact with the ground of simplicity1 purity1 selfishness4 ,heaven is the possibility of fresh acts of self-sacrifice1 of a fuller life of unselfishness4 ,you are a man and a minister in so far as you are unselfish4 ,you cannot learn unselfishness save from the one ,source4 ,definite habits of real devotion--these we must make and keep to and renew and increase4 ,then we shall gradually find that we are less dependent on self--that even in the busiest scenes we dare not act on our own responsibility--that1 be the act ever so small and trifling1 when we are in difficulty we shall naturally1 inevitably1 spontaneously turn to that place whence help alone can come4 ,but it is a wonderful help again and again to feel that we have been #ih alone with ,him1 that we are not working on our own responsibility1 that ,he is the ',living ,will' that rises and flows 'through our deeds and makes them pure4' ,to ,d4 ,d4 ,r4 #h ,alexandra ,gardens1 ,ventnor3 ,jan4 #b1 #ahid4 ,while holding as firmly and unreservedly to the belief that a revelation is a possibility that has actually been realised1 ,i am becoming more aware of the partial and limited view which any single individual can have of the significance of such a revelation2 and with this conviction comes a desire not to hinder by any words or prejudices of mine the education of one to whom ,i owe more than ,i at present know4 ,yet1 as ,i believe that no individual life is beyond the wise ordering of a ,divine economy1 ,i am sure that he must have lessons to learn from me as well as ,i to learn from him4 ,hence ,i dare not refrain from suggesting to him--often in answer to questions that he puts to me--sides of truth which1 as ,i believe1 ,i have been allowed to apprehend4 ,the knowledge of truth 7in however small a degree7 is a trust that we hold for the sake of others4 ,what ,i fear for him and for you--for you even more than for him--is not that you will form wrong opinions on religious or ethical subjects1 but that you will lack that moral earnestness that forces a man1 whether he will or not1 to look the facts of life in the face1 that deadly earnestness that refuses to allow us to contemplate creeds as works of art1 but forces us to ask whether these things be so4 ,life as a whole must be faced4 ,what has induced men to #ii believe this and that tenet8 ,why have men craved for a knowledge of an unseen ,being8 ,why have systems of priestcraft arisen8 ,how is it that those who most revolt against such systems are slaves to other systems bearing different names1 but in substance the same8 ,is there a ,deliverer8 ,is there a unity beneath all this confusion8 ,can man know such a unity if there be one8 ,can such a unity be revealed8 ,has it been revealed8 ,why do men think it has been revealed if it has not8 ,while ,i am slow to force upon those whom ,i most respect and love lessons which ,i believe that ,i have slowly learnt in a school in which perhaps they have not been1 and never will be1 educated1 yet ,i am sure that ,i cannot be wrong in praying for them and in urging them to be increasingly earnest in the search for and the practice of truth4 ,you are a man in so far as you live4 ,you live in so far as you are self-sacrificing4 ,you are self-sacrificing in so far as you unswervingly practise the truth you know and follow after that which you do not yet apprehend4 ,and ,i am sure1 if there be a unity beneath our lives1 if there be ,one who is educating us when we are most wayward1 we shall eventually be led by1 it may be1 very different paths to a single goal4 ,meanwhile each failure to be earnest1 each relapse into sentimentality1 unmanliness1 morbidness1 despair1 unreality1 laziness1 passiveness1 may itself be a discipline1 making us utterly mistrust ourselves1 whether at our worst or at our best1 and forcing us to inquire whether there be any help elsewhere1 any power that can sweep through our lives and force us to be human4 ,for this reason ,i would impress on you the #ajj necessity of trying to think out your position1 of asking yourself how you may be most human and best serve ,god 7if1 indeed1 you believe that this is possible7 and your generation4 ,there are around you social forces making for good4 ,ought you to be--nay1 can you be--isolated8 ,does isolation give greater strength8 ,does it enable you to do more or to be better8 ,these questions are not merely suggested by me4 ,they have already suggested themselves in one form or another to you4 ,i am frightened of their not receiving the attention they merit4 ,to ,t4 ,h4 ,m4 #h ,alexandra ,gardens1 ,ventnor3 ,january #c1 #ahid4 ,the fact that you have not all the sympathy and manly help and advice that you could wish for from those around you will1 ,i trust1 force you to depend with simpler confidence upon the unchanging ,ground of all human sympathy4 ,you will1 ,i hope1 take all these experiences without grumbling as a real and necessary stage in your education2 remembering that if you find yourself repining at the distressful circumstances in which you are placed1 you may be dishonouring ,him who has placed you where you are4 ,i do not1 of course1 mean that such reflection will make you condone and excuse the lukewarmness of others1 but you will grasp the truth that ,god uses even the sin of this world as an instrument in the education of ,his people1 and that you yourself may have your character formed partly through the faults of others1 for whom you are still bound to pray4 #aja ,this great ,christmas festival that is past must be a power to us in the year that is coming on4 ,we must enter into and be penetrated by the ,life that has been manifested4 ,for it is life that you and ,i need4 ,our own puny individualistic life of morbid self-consciousness and sensibility must be transformed by the fuller ,life in which all may have a share2 and thus we shall come to think less of ourselves1 our successes1 our failures1 what others think about us and what others ought to think about us--we shall forget all this because we shall share in the ,universal ,life1 which penetrates through all and which makes men forget themselves and their ills1 and be pure1 simple1 healthy1 unselfish4 ,and this life has been realised and men have seen it1 and it is still with us to-day4 ,in so far as we share in it we shall become natural1 unaffected1 human4 ,nay1 more4 ,because the life there manifested is divine as well as human1 we shall realise also with fuller force what it is to be a child of a ,father who is in heaven4 ,it is life1 not a system1 that we need4 ,it is life which is given us when we are adopted as sons2 it is life that we receive when the ,source of all life gives us ,himself to feed upon2 it is life that ,christ bestows upon us when we gradually realise our position as members of a society in which no man can live for himself alone4 ,life is life in so far as it is unselfish4 ,may ,he who has called us and given to us all our privileges teach us to live out that which we know and believe6 #ajb ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 ,cambridge3 ,august #d1 #ahie4 ,life will not be the same without having you up here4 ,i am very dependent upon others1 and ,i soon begin to be downcast if ,i have not some one to help or to be helped by4 ,but happily ,he who takes away is the same as ,he who gives1 and ,his great heart of affection understands our manifold and seemingly contradictory needs4 ,life would be intolerable if we had no one who knew us perfectly1 not simply the outside part of our life1 but that inside and apparently incommunicable part4 ,those who are least able to express themselves in words1 or who 7if they did express themselves7 fear that they would be misunderstood1 find in ,him an unspeakable consolation4 ,but ,i must not look at things from the individualistic standpoint4 ,no problem can ever be solved until we have in some measure realised that the ,life which flows through us is larger than our own individual life4 ,we get morbid1 and our reason becomes warped1 when we think of our own future alone4 ,every obstacle in our path1 every interruption to the course which we have planned for ourselves1 every rough discipline1 tells us that our life and future are not our own1 that they are intimately connected with a larger life1 a greater future4 ,i have been thinking of those words--so like ,jesus ,christ to have uttered them--me merimnesete4 ,we are always anxious about a set of circumstances which will soon be upon us--engagements which we tremble to meet4 ,jesus ,christ tells us1 me merimnesete4 ,i believe that work in the #ajc present world would be far more free and effective if we would obey the command4 ,we cannot enter into life as it comes1 because we are living in an imaginary future4 ,the man of ,god lives in the present2 he leaves the future to ,god1 me merimnesete4 ,if ,god has conducted us so far1 ,he will not leave us4 ,it is easy to talk1 hard to act4 ,i think we gain the power to act1 we gain the calm peace of ,god1 by compelling ourselves to remain at certain times in ,his presence4 ,habits of prayer are slowly formed1 but when formed are hard to break4 ,talking may be a great snare when it takes the place of prayer--and how easily it does6 ,it is easier to talk with a man than to pray for him--in many cases4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 me--mu1 eta2 merimnesete--mu1 epsilon1 rho1 iota1 mu1 nu1 eta1 sigma1 eta1 tau1 epsilon ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 ,clovelly3 ,september #aa1 #ahie4 ,i am reading ',the ,newcomes'3 have you ever read it8 ,i find it hard to appreciate ,thackeray as much as some people do4 ,occasionally he says some very true things and shows that he is acquainted with human nature in its brighter and darker aspects4 ,but1 on the whole1 the story of marriage and giving in marriage--selling your daughter for money or a title--the picture of young men who sow their wild oats and then repent and marry innocent ladies and live virtuously and die in the odour of sanctity--on the whole the story does not seem to correspond to the ideals which haunt me1 even though ,i do not act up to them4 ,surely life is something utterly different from all this4 ,surely somewhere there is a picture of #ajd human life1 somewhere in the mind of ,god ,himself1 where the young man grows up without any harvest of wild oats1 with clear and unselfish ideals1 with a longing to make the world purer and diviner than he found it1 a picture which is in some measure realised around us to-day4 ,may ,god deliver us not only from vicious but from selfish thoughts6 ,i believe ,thackeray saw something of that picture1 but he didn't draw it with the colours ,i could have wished4 ,there is a solemn text in ,ezekiel1 which came in the lesson lately1 ',the righteousness of the righteous shall not deliver him in the day of his transgression4' ,past religious experiences are of little value without present righteousness4 ,to his cousin ,g4 ,f4 ,clovelly1 ,n4 ,devon3 ,september #ab1 #ahie4 ,i am in perhaps the quaintest and one of the loveliest villages in ,england1 just doing nothing1 and enjoying the simple life around me4 ,you would like this village1 with its one steep1 narrow1 picturesque street1 the great sea far down below1 the little stone pier jutting out and helping to form a small harbour4 ,then on either side of the village are woods reaching down to the cliffs--beautiful woods1 where oaks1 and in places heather1 are glad to grow4 ,st4 ,paul says in the lesson to-day that the things which are seen are temporal1 but the things which are not seen are eternal4 ,and one feels how true are his words--how the trees1 woods1 flowers fade and die2 how the old sea wears slowly away the cliffs2 how men and #aje their dwellings pass away2 how all these things which are seen are temporal2 and yet the beauty1 the love1 the joy1 the purity1 are more permanent than the particular manifestations of them are4 ,the beauty which is manifested in the country around is eternal4 ,the life which is seen in man has a future beyond this world4 ,as we enter in behind the veil1 as we see that life and love which are expressing themselves in objects around us1 we are already in the eternal1 in that which endures4 ,it is not1 as we are constantly thinking1 the things that are present which are temporal1 and the things that are future which are eternal4 ,no2 the things which are present have an eternal side to them--the unseen side4 ,the man who is a slave to the seen has least of the eternal about him3 the man who despises not the seen1 but who through the seen rises to the unseen1 is partaking of eternal life4 4 4 4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 ,cambridge3 ,october #bc1 #ahie4 ,let me congratulate you on the way you ran against ,yale4#a ,i was delighted to read of your 'romping' home66 4 4 4 4 ,it seems to me that every unfulfilled longing is no accidental part of life4 ,the longing1 in so far as it is genuinely human1 is derived from ,him in whose image man is made4 ,when it is hard to see why it is not gratified1 yet we #ajf may confidently believe that this is part of our training4 ,is it not a noble work to enter into and1 in some measure1 bear the burdens of other men's lives1 even if they have only imperfect sympathy with ours8 ,may we not sometimes even learn more in this way--or at least learn different lessons--than if they were so similar to ourselves that they could at once understand us8 ,i am afraid that you have a hard struggle before you4 ,you must take care not to act upon first impressions1 or impulse--not even if those impressions are favourable 4 4 4 your best 'pearls' must be used carefully4 #a ,in the international athletic sports in ,u4,s4,a4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 on his going to a curacy in ,liverpool4 ,cambridge3 ,october #ah1 #ahif4 ,in some respects ,i am glad to hear of your change of plans4 ,i think you will be more in your element working in a poor part of a large town4 4 4 4 ,our dean has just been preaching on the words ',one soweth1 and another reapeth4' ,it is a help to realise the continuity of work4 ,we enter into the work of many a man who has passed away1 and who1 while he worked1 often despaired and thought that he was achieving nothing4 ,no work is lost4 ,the obscure and petty--these are relative terms4 ,we use them1 but we are told on the best authority that there is nothing secret which shall not be made manifest4 ,the consciousness of the continuity and perpetuity of work quiets and calms us2 we need not hurry over anything4 ,when we have left off sowing1 others will reap4 ,god give us grace to work1 for the night #ajg cometh when no man can work4 ,i am so sorry that ,i have not been able to come up and see you4 ,but we are working in the same field1 though it is too large across to see one another6 ,to ,c4 ,t4 ,w4 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,february #ahih4 ,two new toboggan runs have been opened3 one is a ,canadian run on soft snow without turns1 short and sweet2 the other is part of the ,crista run1 an ice run1 which ,i suppose is quite the finest in the world1 with splendid corners4 ,when it is all made it will be about a mile in length4 4 4 4 ,in a noisy salon it is difficult to collect my scattered thoughts4 ,music and other atrocities are in full swing2 and as ,i seldom use my brain now1 the works are rusty4 ,i wish you could see this country in winter4 4 4 4 ,a male rival of ,the ,brook has appeared4 ,he is impressed with the dust and dampness of the atmosphere--takes out trays to toboggan on into ,italy--sprinkles water on his bedroom floor1 because he considers a damp atmosphere conducive to sleep4 ,so far we have not fallen out altogether with one another2 some of us are on speaking terms4 ,we only confidentially discuss whether so-and-so has come here for his mind4 ,we have an archdeacon1 a canon1 a curate1 two captains2 one ,plymouth-brother-like1 who takes most gloomy views about the future of us1 or most of us1 including the parsons2 the other very noisy1 who attempted the ,canadian toboggan run which is supposed to be safe for ladies and #ajh children1 and swears that he almost broke his neck4 ,he had an upset and went head foremost into the snow1 and1 according to his own account1 had to be dug out4 ,if he had been a heavier man1 ,i understand that he would have broken his neck4 ,as two accidents have occurred there1 it is not absolutely safe4 4 4 4 ,this place is a splendid pick-me-up4 ,i am a reformed character--go to bed between #f and #aj4cj ,p4,m4 ,i was detected last night cheating at cards4 ,but reformation to be effective requires time4 ,give up1 ,i say1 one bad habit at a time1 and then tackle the next4 ,i have given up early rising as being the most patent of my evil practices4 ,to ,j4 ,k4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,august #ai1 #ahih4 4 4 4 4 ,i am sure that we have need to learn not only in the school of health but also in the school of sickness4 ,these breaks in life1 and the sense of helplessness and weakness which attend them1 are not simply periods to be 'got over'--to be made the best of till we can 'start again'--but they have a meaning which we can find1 if we only look with the eye of faith4 ,it is strange how1 although ,god sees the whole way in which we ought to go1 ,he leaves us in comparative darkness4 ,we need1 ,i am sure1 revelation4 ',lord1 open the young man's eyes1 that he may see4' ,we shall take the wrong turning if we trust to our ordinary eyes2 we shall find the path if we have the eye of faith to see what ,god is revealing4 4 4 4 ,and now at this time ,i need your prayers4 ,i have--and #aji this1 ,i need hardly say1 is private--an invitation from the ,bishop of ---- to come and lecture to theological students1 whom he hopes to gather round him4 ,of course the scheme is rather in the air so far4 ,he has not yet got the men4 ,but he has an attractive power1 and he might on a smaller scale do some such work as ,vaughan used to do for men who did not go to definite theological colleges4 ,will you pray for me that ,i may go if ,i ought1 and not go if ,i ought not1 please8 ,our wills are ours1 we know not how1 ,our wills are ours1 to make them ,thine4 ,to ,j4 ,l4 ,d4 ,cliff ,dale1 ,cromer3 ,october #c1 #ahih4 ,i do not belong and ,i never have belonged to any of the societies or guilds which you mention4 ,i am a member of a ,church4 ,for that reason ,i dare not join any party4 ,in fact1 ,i cannot understand what 'parties' have to do with a ,church4 ,the ,church by its very existence is a witness against parties and divisions4 ,it will take me more than a lifetime to learn what it is to be a member of a ,church2 and no one can learn the lesson while he persists in clinging to a party4 ,he must be a member not of a part but of a whole4 ,i therefore have no time to waste in joining a party4 ,i feel strongly that the various societies and guilds1 based upon party life1 are eating away the very life of the ,church4 ,but ,i am slow in condemning my neighbour for conscientiously joining any such #aaj society4 ,he may only be able to see one side of truth1 and it is better--far better--that he should see that side than nothing at all4 ,to the mother of his godchild1 ,margaret ,forbes4 ,april #ab1 #ahii4 ,it is such a joy to me to be allowed to be her godparent1 and ,i shall remember her often in my prayers4 ,what a wonderful revelation she must be to you both--making the ,heavenly ,home a fuller reality than ever before6 ,it is through earthly relationships that we realise the meaning of the unseen world4 ,i like those lines of ,faber3 ,all fathers learn their craft from ,thee3 ,all loves are shadows cast ,by the beautiful eternal hills ,of ,thine unbeginning past4 ,to his mother4 ,rouxville1 ,orange ,free ,state2 ,july #h1 #ahii4 ,it is a strange and somewhat terrible study in religion--this ,boer religion4 ,it seems to have little or no connection with morality4 ,kruger seems to have amassed great wealth by doubtful means4 ,a man comes to him and offers him1 say1 #h1jjjl4 on condition that he may have the right to sell mineral waters4 ,mrs4 ,kruger comes in and counts the money2 and if it is right1 the concession is granted4 ,yet he is religious1 very religious4 ,a short time ago they wanted to fire shells into the low-lying clouds during a time #aaa of drought4 ,the clouds gather1 but they will not break4 ,firing shells was found to have a good effect in bringing the rain4 ,but ,kruger stopped it because it was wrong to 'fire shells at the ,almighty4' ,you would think that a little state like this might be an ideal one with its simple scattered population of farmers4 ,but it is by no means so4 ,corruption and injustice are only too prevalent4 ,at the start off they were unfortunate in their choice of ,president4 ,the state was at war with the ,basutos at the time when he was elected2 and three months after he was made ,president he had to be deposed1 because he was discovered selling arms to the ,basutos4 ,the ,dutch don't treat the natives as well as we do4 ,yet in some respects their laws are wise4 ,a native may not live in the ,free ,state without doing some definite work1 unless he pays a tax of #es4 a month3 this is1 ,i think1 a wise rule4 ,we had two very nice services last ,sunday at the ,english church2 ,i preach twice to-morrow4 ,to ,c4 ,t4 ,w4 ,durban2 ,july #ahii4 ,i write to congratulate you most heartily on your ,first ,class4 4 4 4 ,i believe you will find in a year's time that whatever your work may be1 contact with others--the necessity of influencing and guiding them--will be a tremendous help to you in your own life4 4 4 4 ,good man6 ,i am delighted to think that you may see the ,bishop of ,durham4 ,prophets' eyes are #aab needed out here to catch the glory which must be slowly--so slowly--gaining on the shade4 ,there is so much materialism1 so little refinement and spirituality4 ,i had a grand voyage3 only three people rescued from drowning before ,i got on board1 and two stowaways after we left ,madeira1 and two or three days of rough weather4 ,i enjoyed it4 4 4 4 ,i had afternoon tea1 or rather coffee1 with ,uncle ,paul4 ,he is a strong1 fine old man4 ,he was sitting puffing away at his large pipe4 ,it was after a long day's work in the secret ,volksraad4 ,he was tired4 ',it is hard work1' he said1 'for the head4' ,the ,state attorney1 a young ,christ's man1 explained to him that 'we were both at the same school in ,england4' ,kruger was eloquent on the subject of the ,petition4 ,he told me that some of the #ba1jjj had died three years before they signed it1 and some had signed it owing to a bottle of whisky4 ',and ,i want you to let that be known in ,england' 7,i know anything said to you will circulate--by experience74 ,he said1 did the subtle old man1 that he wanted to do what was right and fair irrespective of nationality4 ,this ,transvaal question is complicated4 ,i thought it easy at first4 ,but now ,i can see no moral grounds of any sort for a war with the ,boers1 in spite of their iniquities4 ,there is a great deal to be said on their side1 and much iniquity concealed under such specious phrases as ',imperialism1' ',supremacy of ,great ,britain in ,south ,africa4' ,i cannot see that we have a real cause for war1 but it is a big question with many sides4 ,if ,england goes to war and wins1 she #aac will have her work cut out4 ',can she afford1' said the ,attorney of the ,transvaal to me1 'to have a second ,ireland at the distance of some #e1jjj or #f1jjj miles from home8 ,what if she had war in ,india8 ,to ,w4 ,a4 ,b4 ,lucknow ,lodge1 ,berea1 ,durban3 ,august #bb1 #ahii4 ,i thank my ,god in my prayers on your behalf for ,his goodness in granting you ,his best gift--a human soul to love and to inspire4 ,together you will be able to know and love ,him better than either of you could alone4 ,you cannot make your love too sacred2 as you know ,god you will learn to know one another4 ,we are inclined to think that we know all that love means4 ,the truth is1 we are only beginners4 ,thank ,god that we are in the school1 although only in one of the lowest forms4 ,he will teach us1 as years go by1 to sanctify ourselves for the sake of another4 ,we have not learned to love until we are living the highest possible life1 in order that the object of our affection may become a saint4 ,god is giving you a present1 the value of which you see in part now1 you will realise fully hereafter4 ,you must wrestle with ,god for her and for yourself4 ,if you are true to the highest1 both of you will rise together and see ,god4 ,if you are not1 she may not be able to mount alone4 ,i am filled with joy and hope as ,i think of you both4 ,i believe that you will live for ,god more completely now than ever before1 and that you will be a fuller blessing to your people4 ,you have my prayers4 #aad ,i want you to make your ideals higher and higher4 ,then1 when you have gained one height1 you will find that what you took for the summit from the plain was not really so3 there were further peaks beyond4 ,it is the beginning of an endless life4 ,if ,god ,himself be the centre of all1 the nearer we are to ,him1 the nearer we are to one another4 ,i am glad that your wife is one who shares in your ideals1 who lives for the highest4 ,what a life in store for you here6 ,and there-- ,before the judgment seat1 ,though changed and glorified each face1 ,not unremembered you will meet ,for endless ages to embrace4 ,you will be nearer the centre then1 and nearer to one another4 ,may ,god ,himself bless you1 dear old fellow6 ,forgive this poor attempt at a letter4 ,i share in your joy1 although ,i am not actually with you4 ,i never remember any wedding outside my own family which has given me greater pleasure4 ,it was good of you to ask me to be present--very good4 ,b----1 ,i am glad4 ,you must thank ,god and ask ,him to tell you what it all means1 and for her sake live as good a life as you possibly can4 ,with best love ,i am your friend1 ,,forbes4 ,to a ,friend after hearing of his intended ordination4 ,durban3 ,august #ahii4 ,your ordination will be like my own over again4 ,it is unutterably good of ,god 4 4 4 to put it into #aae your heart to live the life which ,i had prayed might be yours4 ,meizoteran touton ouk charin1 hina akouo ta ema tekna en te aletheia peripatounta 4 4 4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 ,meizoteran--,mu1 epsilon1 iota1 zeta1 omicron1 tau1 epsilon1 rho1 alpha1 nu2 touton--tau1 omicron1 upsilon1 tau1 omega1 nu2 ouk--omicron1 upsilon1 kappa2 charin--chi1 alpha1 rho1 iota1 nu2 hina--7rough breathing mark7 iota1 nu1 alpha2 akouo--alpha1 kappa1 omicron1 upsilon1 omega2 ta--tau1 alpha2 ema--epsilon1 mu1 alpha2 tekna--tau1 epsilon1 kappa1 nu1 alpha2 en--epsilon1 nu2 te--tau1 eta2 aletheia--alpha1 lambda1 eta1 theta1 epsilon1 iota1 alpha2 peripatounta--pi1 epsilon1 rho1 iota1 pi1 alpha1 tau1 omicron1 upsilon1 nu1 tau1 alpha 4 4 4 ,if your temptations are great it is because your nature is rich and noble2 and when it is disciplined you will have tremendous power4 ,i shall not be content until your every thought is led captive to 'the obedience of the ,christ4' ,you are born to be a saint1 and you will be wretched until you are one4 ,you are not the kind of man who can do things by halves4 ,i think ,i have told you of my father's words spoken during his last illness3 ',if ,i had a thousand lives1 ,i would give them all--all to the ministry4' ,you will not regret your decision4 ,if angels could envy1 how they would envy us our splendid chance--to be able1 in a world where everything unseen must be taken on sheer faith1 in a world where the contest between the flesh and the spirit is being decided for the universe1 not only to win the battle ourselves but also to win it for others6 ,to help a brother up the mountain while you yourself are only just able to keep your foothold1 to struggle through the mist together--that surely is better than to stand at the summit and beckon4 ,you will have a hard time of it1 ,i know2 and ,i would like to make it smoother and to 'let you down' easier2 but ,i am sure that ,god1 who loves you even more than ,i do1 and has absolute wisdom1 will not tax you beyond your strength4 4 4 4 ,i'll pray for you1 like the widow in the parable1 and ,i have immense belief in prayer4 4 4 4 ,you remember what was said of ,maurice1 ',he #aaf always impressed me as a man who was naturally weak in his will2 but an iron will seemed to work through him4' ,that ,will can work through you and transform you1 but for ,god's sake don't trust to your own will4 4 4 4 ,if you are ordained it will be because there is one who in ,st4 ,paul's words--ho aphorisas me ek koilias metros mou--was separating you from birth and educating you with a view to the ,gospel of ,christ4 4 4 4 ,tasks in hours of insight willed ,can be through hours of gloom fulfilled4#a #a ,matthew ,arnold1 ,morality4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 ho--7rough breathing mark7 omicron2 aphorisas--alpha1 phi1 omicron1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 alpha1 final sigma2 me--mu1 epsilon2 ek--epsilon1 kappa2 koilias--kappa1 omicron1 iota1 lambda1 iota1 alpha1 final sigma2 metros--mu1 eta1 tau1 rho1 omicron1 final sigma2 mou--mu1 omicron1 upsilon ,to his mother4 ,estcourt1 ,natal2 ,august #ah1 #ahii4 ,general ,gordon came to ,kokstad on his way to ,basutoland4 ,when he arrived he went to the ,royal ,hotel1 ordered a room1 threw open the window1 and spent two hours in prayer and meditation4 ,the next day was ,sunday4 ,he asked ,mr4 ,adkin what was being done for #a1jjj ,cape ,mounted ,infantry then stationed there1 and when he learnt that nothing was being done for their spiritual food1 he burst into tears4 ,on ,monday morning the first telegram which he sent off to the ,cape ,government was a request that a chaplain should be appointed4 ,mr4 ,adkin was appointed and remained chaplain until the force was disbanded4 ,general ,gordon went on to ,basutoland1 and had wonderful power over the natives4 ,he told them that no force would be brought against #aag them2 he himself was without weapons4 ,he was settling the country1 when news came to him that the ,cape ,government was1 contrary to stipulation1 sending an armed force against them2 so he left the country in twenty-four hours4 ,cecil ,rhodes was once at ,kokstad4 ,when he was near the place1 he lay down on the hillside and exclaimed3 ',oh1 how ,i wish they would let me alone--let me stay here6' ,however1 he had to go down to be fted4 ,he was listless1 and bored by the banquet1 until the present mayor began to attack him violently in his speech1 and to complain about the ,cape ,government1 and to express a desire that ,natal would take them over4 ,then ,rhodes woke up with a vengeance and gave them a great speech4 ,ixopo is where ,rhodes started out in ,south ,africa4 ,his name still figures on the magistrates' books--fined #ajl41 for selling a gun to a native4 ,to his cousin1 ,j4 ,c4 ,h2 on the occasion of the death of his brother4 ,december #g1 #ahii4 ,you know1 without my saying it1 that you have my deep sympathy and prayers at this time4 4 4 4 ,we dare not and cannot sorrow as do others who have no certain hope4 ,our sorrow is of another kind4 ,for ,i am quite sure that ,in ,his vast world above1 ,a world of broader love1 ,god hath some grand employment for ,his son4#a #aah ,how real it all makes that other world1 to have our own brothers there6 ,it makes it in a deeper sense our home4 #a ,faber1 ,the ,old ,labourer4 ,to the mother of his godchild1 ,margaret ,forbes4 ,dore ,house1 ,st4 ,leonards3 ,january #aj1 #aijj4 ,i am so glad to feel that my little godchild will have real training4 ,i don't know how far ,i received such a training myself at an early age 4 4 4 ,i came towards the end of a large family4 ,the only permanent instruction which ,i can remember imparted to me by my nursery maid was a caution not to look behind me when ,i passed people in the street1 enforced by the biblical precept1 ',remember ,lot's wife4' ,i know what a fascination ,i had to look behind1 accompanied by a terrible dread of the consequences4 ,i have always felt that ,faber's ',god of my ,childhood' describes the normal and true development of a child's life4 ,i am sure that1 although the gravity of sin should be early recognised1 greater stress should be laid upon the ,fatherhood and kindness of ,god4 ,i was noticing to-day1 when reading the second lesson1 how ,westcott and ,hort have placed the clause in the ,lord's ,prayer which speaks of the ,fatherhood of ,god in a line by itself as a heading to the whole prayer1 putting a colon after the clause1 and beginning the first petition with a capital letter4 ,the prayer begins with ',fatherhood' and ends with a reference to ',sinfulness4' ,i think this fact is significant4 ,we may not all be intended to come to #aai know religious truth in that order4 ,but ,i think we are intended1 when we do know it1 to lay even more stress on the ,fatherhood of ,god than on our own imperfections4 ,it is a wonderful and terrible thing to watch the development of a human spirit4 ,we can understand so little about any life1 even when it is near and dear to us4 ,but ,i am not sure that we cannot learn more about others than we can about ourselves4 ,i never think it is profitable to study oneself too closely6 ,i never could meditate with any profit on my sins4 ,but there1 ,i dare say1 ,i differ from many others4 ,well1 ,i hope that the hair of my godchild is growing1 and that she has now more than her god-father4 ,his is coming to an untimely end4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h2 who had recently become a chaplain in the ,navy4 ,st4 ,leonards3 ,january #aa1 #aijj4 ,i am thinking of you in your new1 difficult1 and interesting life1 and wondering how you like it4 ,or1 rather1 ,i am sure that you like it in its main features4 ,there are in every life drawbacks and discouragements1 for we live by faith and not by sight1 and faith must be perfected in the midst of perplexities and contradictions4 ,the mists are useful4 ,it would not do to have brilliant sunshine all the time4 ,for in that case1 where would faith come in8 ,steering towards our port in the fog means trusting the ,pilot4 ',mercifully grant that we1 which know ,thee now by faith1 may after this life have the fruition of ,thy glorious ,godhead4' ,i suppose that none of us fully #abj knows what this prayer means4 ,i think that there will be more need of faith hereafter than we usually think4 ,can we ever apprehend the ,father or the ,son without faith8 ,the deepest truths are grasped by faith not sight4 ,the man who has learned to exercise faith here will have fuller scope for his faith hereafter4 ,what a shock to wake up in the next world and to find that the riddles of life still need faith for their solution6 ,yet ,i imagine that it will be so4 ,only faith will be able to go deeper than here4 ,the faith perfected in the mists of life will1 in the sunshine of eternity1 see deeper into the meaning of events4 ,i wish ,i had more faith4 ,not sudden flights of faith annihilating time and space and rising up to the throne of heaven4 ,but ,i wish ,i could ground all my actions on faith1 and regularly see the invisible and live as one who could see always and everywhere the ,unseen4 ,we are schooled in different ways4 ,we cannot attain to perfection in a night4 ,as we advance in the ,christian life progress seems slower4 ,in some sense it is so4 ,it is easier to cast off a number of definite bad habits clearly inconsistent with the ideal just at first1 than to perfect self-sacrifice1 humility1 and self-discipline4 ,but we are advancing1 though we know it not4 ,if the engines are always kept working1 we shall reach our goal6 ,to ,c4 ,n4 ,w2 who had recently been ordained4 ,st4 ,leonards-on-,sea3 ,january #ab1 #aijj4 ,you must remember how much your future efficiency is dependent upon a judicious use of your #aba strength during the next two or three years4 ,i am sure you are right in looking back upon your life and tracing in its developments a higher than human guidance4 ,it is a helpful thing to trace now and anon ,god's hand in our individual life4 ,it brings ,him nearer to us1 and it is an awful thought that ,he is actually working within us4 ,it makes us trust ,him for time to come even when the prospect is gloomy4 ,i think that we do well to spend some time in trying to interpret details of our past life4 ,as years go on1 we should have such a firm faith founded on the rock of experience that we will not be lightly shaken4 ,peace should be a characteristic of our life--the joy and peace which come from a certainty that there is a ,purpose in all events4 ,the sense that ,god has been with us in the past is a help in interpreting the history of our nation4 ,even our troubles are a proof that ,he is disciplining us4 ,for the service of ,intercession1 which my brother uses in ,westminster ,abbey at the time of this war1 the opening sentence is ',the ,lord our ,god be with us1' and the answer is1 ',as ,he was with our fathers4' ,the ,college is getting on well4 ,you must come up and see me this year1 while you still know a number of men4 ,i have now a little evening service--compline--in my rooms at #aj o'clock2 ,masterman asked me to have it4 ,he asked men to come1 and they asked others4 ,i purposely refrained from asking any one4 ,we are sometimes a goodly number4 ,i think it is helpful to those who come4 ,it is1 ,i know1 to me4 ,we have a hymn when we have sufficient musical talent6 #abb ,to ,g4 ,j4 ,c4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 #aijj4 ,gwatkin has exploded ,anthony1 'who never existed4' ,but for all that ,i think ,anthony is much like ,adam and ,eve4 ,the originals may 'never have existed4' ,yet their story belongs to all time4 ,and there will be ,anthonies and ,adams and ,eves to the end of time4 ,it comforts me to feel that that which makes for evil is not my true self1 but a wretched1 cunning animal existence independent of me1 existing before ,i came into being1 although capable of appealing to me--a serpent4 ,i am half glad and half sorry to hear of your harmonium4 ,public worship is a terribly difficult thing1 and it is well at times that we should realise its difficulties1 and have it stripped bare of many helpful accessories4 ,yet worship in a village church impresses me4 ,as in a college chapel1 ,i realise then the continuity of the race4 ,an old church tells me of generations of men who lived my life1 to whom the present was everything1 and the dead almost nothing1 who never could seriously believe that some day the world would whirl and follow the sun without them4 ,it tells me more than most things of what ,st4 ,paul means when he said that we were all making one perfect man4 ,and ,i am humbled and thankful to know that ,i in my generation can do something towards the ,christ 'that is to be4' ,read the ,old ,testament itself4 ,nothing will #abc atone for lack of knowledge of the ,bible4 ,robertson ,smith's and ,adam ,smith's books 7especially the latter's7 on the ,old ,testament ,prophets ought to prove useful4 4 4 4 ,when ,i call a man by his ,christian name1 ,i usually make it a rule to pray for him4 ,i shall do so in your case4 ,i will try to pray every day4 ,i wonder whether you would sometimes pray for me3 ,i believe immensely in the power of prayer4 ,it is the greatest favour ,i can ask of you1 and ,i know ,i have no right to prefer the request2 but it would be kind of you if you could occasionally4 ,one needs all the help one can get in this strange life up here4 ,now ,i will end4 ,i have written you a strange1 unreserved letter4 ,forgive me4 ,how ,i wish this dreadful war was at an end6 ,u----'s going was a blow to me2 but ,i am sure he did the right thing4 ,i admire and love that man4 4 4 4 ,to ,g4 ,j4 ,c4 ,castleton1 ,swanage3 #aijj4 4 4 4 ,you will not have misinterpreted my silence4 ,i could not answer your letter until ,i had secured a time for quiet thought and for prayer4 ,when ,i try to write1 ,i feel the uselessness of words4 ,i am doing better when ,i am praying for you than when ,i am writing to you4 ,yet ,i must write4 4 4 4 ,it is strange that ,god should have made us thus4 ,to those whom ,he honours most ,he gives largest capacity for love1 and therefore largest capacity for suffering4 ,it is still more strange that we would not wish to be #abd without the love in spite of the agony which it brings4 ,it must be because ,all loves are shadows cast ,by the beautiful eternal hills ,of ,thine unbeginning past4 ,i feel this truth 'in seasons of calm weather4' ,but at other times ,i ask myself1 ,i ask ,god1 angrily1 ,why should some men have no obstacle to their love8 ,why should another suffer more than any one can tell--more than1 it sometimes seems to me1 can ever be requited8 ,i cannot answer the question4 ,but ,i often think of the great unsatisfied heart of ,god1 and then ,i think of this poor unsatisfied heart made in ,his image1 and ,i feel that ,he understands me1 and that ,i understand ,him better than ,i used to do1 before this terrible hunger of love began4 ,i pray ,god that ,he will deal tenderly with you1 ,g----1 and ,i am sure that ,he will4 ,it cuts me to the heart to think of your suffering1 and ,i would stop it this moment if ,i could4 ,so would ,god--for ,he loves you more than ,i do--unless it were the best thing for you4 ,it is written of the ,son of man1 emathen aph on epathen4 ,may the same words be true of you and of me6 ,god bless you and give you ,light and ,peace6 ,peace is something more than joy1 ,even the joys above2 ,for peace1 of all created things1 ,is likest ,him we love4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrase in the above paragraph was transliterated as follows3 emathen--epsilon1 mu1 alpha1 theta1 epsilon1 nu2 aph--alpha1 phi2 on--emega1 nu2 epathen--epsilon1 pi1 alpha1 theta1 epsilon1 nu ,this letter may appear cold to you4 ,it is not4 ,i feel more deeply than ,i write4 4 4 4 ,some day1 if #abe you care to hear1 ,i will tell you something about my own imperfect life4 ,i can't write it down4 ,later the day will dawn4 ,but ,god sends the darkness that we may learn to trust ,him1 ,i have never yet found ,him to fail4 ,we cannot trust ,him too much4 ,to the mother of a friend1 after having been present at his funeral4 ,cambridge3 ,april #bb1 #aijj4 ,i feel ,i must write and tell you how grateful ,i am to you for your kindness in allowing me to be present on ,thursday4 ,whenever ,i think of your son who has passed away1 that text comes into my mind3 ',blessed are the pure in heart1 for they shall see ,god4' ,he was pure in heart1 and ,i cannot think of him as lifeless1 but as actually seeing ,god4 4 4 4 ,i am thankful to have been allowed to be his friend4 ,i shall never forget him2 his life remains a source of strength and inspiration to me4 ,it comforts me now to know that he is sinking deeper and deeper into the peace of ,god1 which passeth all understanding4 ,you were talking to me about ,w----2 ,i could not say all that ,i wished to say4 4 4 4 ,i am very1 very slow to suggest ordination to a man4 ,i realise the responsibility of doing so1 but there is no man whom ,i desire to see ordained more than ,w----2 he has been to me more help than ,i can possibly say4 ,i dare not try to tell you all that he has done for me1 because you would think ,i was exaggerating4 ,i cannot help feeling that1 if he helps me so much1 he might help others also1 and that1 if he were ordained1 #abf he would have singular opportunities for rendering such help4 ,but ,i do not press him in the matter1 because ,i might do wrong2 but ,i pray again and again that1 if ,god wishes him to be ordained1 ,he will make ,his purpose clear1 and ,i am quite sure that ,he will not leave us in the dark4 ,to ,c4 ,t4 ,w4 ,cambridge3 ,july #aijj4 ,i was delighted to read in the paper yesterday of your election to a fellowship4 4 4 4 ,the life will be a harder one than that of an ordinary parish clergyman2 it will be easier to lose sight of ideals4 ,but the importance of the work is in proportion to its difficulty4 ,blessed is the man who finds his work1 and does it2 and you will be blessed4 4 4 4 ,you should read ,st4 ,patrick's ',confession1' a genuine work of my distinguished countryman4 ,it is full of humility and zeal4 ,i give you a quotation3 ',after ,i had come to ,ireland ,i used daily to feed cattle1 and ,i often prayed during the day4 ,more and more did the love of ,god and the fear of ,him increase1 and faith became stronger and the spirit was moved2 so that in one day ,i said as many as a hundred prayers1 and in the night nearly the same4 4 4 4 ,and there was no sluggishness in me1 as ,i now see there is1 for at that time the spirit was fervent within me4' ,pathetic--that last part4 ,he might have been living at ,cambridge6 ,but ,i hope better things for you4 #abg ,to ,c4 ,t4 ,w4 ,thirlmere3 ,september #aijj4 ,my thoughts are with you now--and my prayers4 ',he had seven stars--in ,his right hand1' was the thought which comforted me at my own ordination1 when ,i felt1 as seldom before1 my own hollowness and incapacity4 ,we can shed light--we are safe--because we are 'in ,his right hand4' ',the eternal ,god is our refuge1 and underneath are the everlasting arms4' ,we can never go beyond ,his love and care4 ,in moments of perplexity and uncertainty1 although we cannot feel ,his presence1 ,he is there4 ',in ,his right hand4' ',they that turn many to righteousness shall shine as the stars for ever and ever4' ,may ,god give you the power to love and the power to pray6 ,much prayer and much love are needed for a successful ministry4 ,good-bye1 and ,god bless you and make you a true and faithful pastor6 ,remember ,st4 ,paul's words3 he dunamis en astheneia teleitai4 edista oun mallon kauchesomai en tais astheneiais1 hina episkenose ep eme he dunamis tou ,christou2 hotan gar artheno1 tote dunatos eimi4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases above were transliterated as follows3 he--7rough breathing mark7 eta2 dunamis--delta1 upsilon1 nu1 alpha1 mu1 iota1 final sigma2 en--epsilon1 nu2 astheneia--alpha1 sigma1 theta1 epsilon1 nu1 epsilon1 iota1 alpha2 teleitai--tau1 epsilon1 lambda1 epsilon1 iota1 tau1 alpha1 iota2 edista--eta1 delta1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 alpha2 oun--omicron1 upsilon1 nu2 mallon--mu1 alpha1 lambda1 lambda1 omicron1 nu2 kauchesomai--kappa1 alpha1 upsilon1 chi1 eta1 sigma1 omicron1 mu1 alpha1 iota2 en--epsilon1 nu2 tais--tau1 alpha1 iota1 final sigma2 astheneiais--alpha1 sigma1 theta1 epsilon1 nu1 epsilon1 iota1 alpha1 iota1 final sigma2 hina--7rough breathing mark7 iota1 nu1 alpha2 episkenose--epsilon1 pi1 iota1 sigma1 kappa1 eta1 nu1 omega1 sigma1 eta2 ep--epsilon1 pi2 eme--epsilon1 mu1 epsilon2 he--7rough breathing mark7 eta2 dunamis--delta1 upsilon1 nu1 alpha1 mu1 iota1 final sigma2 tou--tau1 omicron1 upsilon2 ,christou--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 upsilon2 hotan--7rough breathing mark7 omicron1 tau1 alpha1 nu2 gar--gamma1 alpha1 rho2 artheno--alpha1 rho1 theta1 epsilon1 nu1 omega2 tote--tau1 omicron1 tau1 epsilon2 dunatos--delta1 upsilon1 nu1 alpha1 tau1 omicron1 final sigma2 eimi--epsilon1 iota1 mu1 iota ,to ,w4 ,d4 ,h4 ,dale ,head ,post ,office1 ,thirlmere1 ,september #bj1 #aijj4 ,my thoughts and my prayers are with you at this time4 ,i remember how at my own ordination1 when ,i felt as never before my own utter weakness and incapacity1 the thoughts in the first chapter of the ,revelation1 of ,christian ministers as 'stars in ,his #abh right hand' comforted and supported me4 ,in ,his right hand--with ,his power we can do all things4 ,as the lesson for to-day says1 he dunamis en astheneia teleitai1 strength is perfected in weakness4 hotan astheno tote dunatos eimi4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases above were transliterated as follows3 he--7rough breathing mark7 eta2 dunamis--delta1 upsilon1 nu1 alpha1 mu1 iota1 final sigma2 en--epsilon1 nu2 astheneia--alpha1 sigma1 theta1 epsilon1 nu1 epsilon1 iota1 alpha2 teleitai--tau1 epsilon1 lambda1 epsilon1 iota1 tau1 alpha1 iota2 hotan--7rough breathing mark7 omicron1 tau1 alpha1 nu2 astheno--alpha1 sigma1 theta1 epsilon1 nu1 omega2 tote--tau1 omicron1 tau1 epsilon2 dunatos--delta1 upsilon1 nu1 alpha1 tau1 omicron1 final sigma2 eimi--epsilon1 iota1 mu1 iota ,you will feel more1 as years go on1 the greatness of the task which you are undertaking--the overwhelming responsibility--the dread lest through any carelessness on your part one of the least of the sheep may be lost4 ,but you will also feel more and more that you are 'in ,his right hand4' ,and if the eternal ,god is your refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms1 you need not fear what the devil or man can do unto you4 ,i pray that ,god may be with you and give you the spirit of prayer and the spirit of love4 ,your ministry will only be effective if you pray much and love much4 ,and if you make mistakes1 yet if you love much your sins will be forgiven4 ,to his brother1 a doctor in ,south ,africa4 ,september #aijj4 ,when ,i feel what the grace of ,god has done for my life1 what it is doing1 what it will do1 ,i can despair of no one else4 ,i am filled with wonder and amazement and thanksgivings and hopes4 ,i am sometimes so thankful that ,i still live1 that in a world of light and dark shadows ,i can show my faith in ,god1 before the other world dawns with its full day and unclouded brightness--and most of all that ,i can here and now pray for those whom ,he has taught me to love4 ,i cannot conceive this world without prayer4 ,it is #abi worth while making any efforts1 however desperate1 to learn to pray4 ,when the ,day dawns1 how wonderful it will be to look back and trace the path through which ,he has led us in the ,twilight6 ,to ,f4 ,j4 ,c4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 #aijj4 ,the more ,he tries you by ,his silence1 the greater to my mind is the proof that ,he believes in you4 ,he knows you will come through4 ,he has great work for you to do1 and therefore you need a strong perfected faith1 and ,he is trying to give you it4 ,i am so sorry at what you tell me about prayer4 ,but do go on4 ,when things are at their darkest light comes4 ,after all ,god knows how much you can bear1 and ,he will not1 if you will only persevere1 allow you to be utterly confounded4 ,don't be in the least discouraged at your inability to concentrate your attention4 ,even a man who had lived in the presence of ,god for years has told us that ,the world that looks so dull all day ,glows bright on me at prayer1 ,and plans that ask no thought but these1 ,wake up and meet me there4 ,my very flesh has restless fits2 ,my changeful limbs conspire ,with all these phantoms of the mind ,my inner self to tire4 ,do you expect to fare better1 when you are exercising faculties which have been for long more or less dormant8 ,the same man goes on to say--and ,i #acj think it is a comforting truth--that ,god sees further than we do1 sees what we mean3 ,these surface troubles come and go1 ,like rufflings of the sea2 ,the deeper depth is out of reach ,to all1 my ,god1 but ,thee4 ,even if your conscience condemns you1 remember that ,god is greater than your conscience4 ,he sees that you want to pray1 and the battle is half won when there is even the want4 ,i like these old words of the hymn3 ,satan trembles when he sees ,the weakest saint upon his knees1 even if he can't collect his thoughts4 ,i find it usually easier to pray for others than for myself4 ,i believe in beginning by praying for what is easiest4 ,i don't kneel down4 ,i find it more possible to concentrate my attention when ,i am walking about or sitting down4 ,and ,i tell ,god what ,i know about a man1 and how ,i want him to live a better life4 ,sometimes ,i seem to struggle for him as though for very life4 ,i go on and on and on--sometimes repeating the same request4 ,i try to copy the poor widow who wearied out the dishonest judge4 ,i am not distressed when my thoughts wander1 ,i know that they will always wander without ,god's help4 ,the distress occasioned by wandering thoughts1 and the attempt to trace the stages by which they wandered1 ,i regard as temptations of the devil4 4 4 4 ,i go back as calmly as possible to the matter in hand4 ,excuse my 'egoism4' ,i put it in the first person1 #aca because ,i believe my own experience will help you more than rules derived from the experience of others4 ,suppose you spend half an hour in this way1 and only really pray for three or four minutes1 your efforts will be more than rewarded4 ,you will have done more than you know for the person for whom you have prayed4 ,and the next half-hour you will find that you can concentrate your attention for a minute or two longer4 ,don't think too much about yourself when you pray4 ,you must lose your soul if you would save it4 ,there is probably some one thing or some one person easier than others for you to pray for4 ,begin with that4 ,i never try1 as some people do1 to classify and enter into details about my sins4 ,i bring the whole contradictory1 weary1 and unintelligible mass of them to ,god1 and leave them with ,him4 ,i am quite sure ,i shall never do better without ,him4 ,but ,i know that ,he believes in me1 and will help me in spite of myself4 ,he believes in you too1 dear old fellow6 ,may ,god bless you for your kindness to me6 ,write me just a short note to tell me that you don't despise me in spite of what must seem to you rather unintelligible and ridiculous confessions4 ,i can't help it4 ,and if you can bring yourself to do it1 call me too by my ,christian name4 ,to the same4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,september #bh1 #aijj4 ,i feel more and more the necessity of being alone occasionally for some time--to get time enough to #acb pray4 ,i think my supreme desire is to be a man of prayer4 ,you must help me to accomplish the desire3 ',gutta cavat lapidem non vi1 sed saepe cadendo4' ,so it is with prayer4 ,as the stone gets worn away1 not by the force of the drop of water but by its constant trickling1 so prayer often renewed must at length attain its end4 ,it is a wonderful privilege to be able to state all one's wishes and hopes for others in prayer--to know that there can be there no possibility of misunderstanding--to tell to ,god the incomprehensible depth of one's love1 and to feel that ,he knows what it means1 because ,he ,himself is love4 ,it is glorious to be made in ,his image1 and to be sure that all one's highest yearnings are a reflection--however broken1 partial1 and unsightly--of ,his own marvellous life4 ,we have indeed cause to be grateful for our 'creation4' ,i often look at the poor dumb creatures1 and thank ,god that ,he has given me such full powers of love1 which they cannot understand3 for ,i would rather have the pains of love than any other pleasure4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h41 a chaplain in the ,navy4 ,cambridge3 ,november #d1 #aijj4 ,i ought to have written before this4 ,the fact that ,i did not answer at once is partly accounted for by my having a good deal of work to do1 and partly by physical weakness4 ,i have not been very well this term4 ,it is cruel of you to suspect me of having forgotten all about you4 ,i am not that sort4 ,i owe too much to you in the past ever to forget you4 #acc ,i don't think that you really suspected me of inconstancy4 ,i am so sorry that you are sometimes lonely and very miserable4 ,i feel at times weak1 physically weak4 ,i think that at such times one can lean back1 as it were1 on the ,divine arms4 ,he understands our weakness and weariness4 ,he knows what loneliness and sadness mean4 ,and ,he is not extreme to mark what we do amiss4 ,he knows that we are but flesh4 ,and ,he 'dwells not in the light alone1 but in the darkness and the light4' ,even when the darkness hides ,him and we cannot find where ,he is1 we can1 as it were1 reach out our hands to ,him1 and we are safe4 ,god has much to teach us while we are teaching others4 ,and life is not exactly the same as we thought at the beginning4 ,he teaches us by unexpected experiences4 ,but the comfort is that ,he never changes2 we may be weary1 but ,he never slumbers nor sleeps4 ,sometimes we feel very fit and capable4 ,then is the time to pray and to rise to the heights4 ,later1 when we are incapable1 although it is hard to rise1 we need not fall4 ,when the mist clears we can go on again1 and it may be that we shall find that even in the mist we had gone further than we thought4 ,the deep snow and the long dark rainy days are necessary for the perfecting of the fruit1 as well as the sunshine4 ,and we do need sunshine4 ,i feel more and more grateful and thankful to ,god for ,his goodness4 ,he has been so good to me1 and ,i don't deserve it4 ,and ,i think that if you look back and look forward you will feel more and more ,his marvellous sympathy and affection4 ,i am glad you have been reading ,robertson's ,life4 ,though he #acd may have been almost morbid at times1 he was a great man and did a great work4 4 4 4 ,you will find later that your work has been far more effective than you expected4 ,don't try to rush it4 ,you can't help men much until you know them very well2 and when you know them you find how utterly different they are from what you had expected them to be4 ,at least ,i do4 ,no two men are alike4 ,each man that you come really to know is utterly different from any man you have ever met or will meet4 ,to ,f4 ,j4 ,c4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,november #e1 #aijj4 ,it is good of you to think of me and above all to pray for me4 ,i need your prayers--and most of all when ,i am run down and unable to pray myself4 ,i can see the mountain top at times3 then the mist comes down1 and ,i cannot see the way2 ,i try to keep where ,i am1 though ,i may not be able to advance2 and when the mist clears ,i go on again4 ,possibly1 sometimes1 we may be going forward even in the mist1 although we seem to be making no progress1 or going backward4 ,god judges by a light ,which baffles mortal sight4 ,i often wish ,i had more physical strength and was able to do what other men can do2 but ,i can't4 ,and ,i have no doubt that all is well--that ,i am made to do one particular piece of work1 and that ,i have strength enough for that--and thank ,god for that4 #ace ,to a brother in ,south ,africa4 ,december #aijj4 ,it is a marvellous thought that ,god can reveal ,himself to man--even primitive man4 ,in those stories ,jehovah is very near to man4 ,he walks in the garden at nightfall4 ,he shuts ,noah into the ,ark4 ,he comes down to see the city and the tower 'which the children of men builded4' ,he talks with ,moses face to face as a man speaketh to his friend--and a ladder connects heaven and earth1 and the angels1 instead of using wings1 walk up and down the ladder--and1 behold1 ,jehovah stood above it4 ,at any moment you might meet ,jehovah ,himself4 ,three men come to see ,abraham--and ,jehovah has appeared to him4 ,a man wrestles with ,jacob1 and he has seen ,god face to face4 ,they were right when they thought of ,god as very near to man1 of man as capable of reflecting ,god's likeness4 ,ye too shall see heaven opened and the angels of ,god ascending and descending upon--the ,son of man4 ,it is good for us as children to read these stories to realise that heaven is very near to earth4 ,it is good for us as men to read them again to realise that heaven is even nearer earth than we thought as children4 ,as ,i said before1 how marvellous it is that ,god can reveal ,himself to man and through man1 that ,he has revealed ,himself entirely1 'the perfect man1' as ,maurice says1 reflecting the perfect ,god--,god and man so near one to the other that men can look upon the ,son of man and see ,god--see ,him in ,his perfection6 ,our years ought to be bound each to #acf each by natural piety4 ,the child should surely be the father of the man4 ,with age ,thou growest more divine1 ,more glorious than before2 ,i fear ,thee with a deeper fear ,because--,i love ,thee more4 ,i have been reading ,moody's ,life4 ,it has much the same effect as ,finney's used to have in days gone by--it creates a longing to work and live for ,god1 to bring men nearer to ,him1 to come nearer to ,him myself4 ,whom have ,i in heaven but ,thee8 and there is none upon earth that ,i desire in comparison of ,thee4 ,what a wonderful thing that we1 as a family1 are so united--that our ,ideal is so much the same--isn't it8 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,january #f1 #aija4 ,i have succeeded in unfreezing my ink1 so ,i can write and--although it is late to do so--wish you a happy new century4 ,it is only once in a lifetime that one can do that sort of thing6 ,i am out here for my health4 ,i wasn't up to much last term4 ,however1 ,i am as fit as a lord now1 and return to ,cambridge this week4 ,i have been reading out here two very different kinds of books4 ,one is ,wellhausen's ',history of ,israel1' the other ,moody's ,life by his son4 ,wellhausen's book gives you in outline the position of modern advanced criticism of the ,old ,testament4 ,i have never before studied the history from the critical point of view really seriously4 ,the study has proved extraordinarily interesting1 and ,i #acg must say that in the main ,i agree thoroughly with ,wellhausen's position4 ,you will see it more or less clearly put in that ',history of the ,hebrew ,people' in two small volumes by ,kent which ,i recommended to you before4 ,the history of the gradual progress of the divine revelation to the human race is a marvellous study3 the way in which that people were educated to become the teachers of the world is utterly different from anything which we should have devised4 ,i am struck more and more by the marvellous fact that ,god can and does reveal ,himself--in ,his essential moral nature--to man2 that we are so made that we can apprehend the revelation2 nay1 that we in turn can in measure reveal ,him to men6 ,moody's ,life stirs me up to realise more the worth of the individual1 the surpassing value of man's moral and spiritual nature4 ,i long to help men to see what ,i see1 to love ,him whom ,i love1 and the failure of my efforts is largely1 ,i feel1 due to defects in myself4 ,still ,i do not despair of doing something4 ,to his brother ,edward in ,south ,africa4 ,brislington1 ,bristol2 ,april #aj1 #aija4 ,i was much interested in 4 4 4 7your letter7 and in seeing a little into your life4 ,there is a strange family reserve among us which ,i sometimes deplore4 ,perhaps it must always be so1 that we can tell most readily to strangers our deepest thoughts and feelings4 ,yet ,i feel that we ought1 as far as we can in this short life1 to understand one another4 ,we have been led by different paths to understand different aspects #ach of ,truth4 ,yet1 when we have climbed to the top of the hill1 ,i dare say we shall find that our paths were nearer to one another than we ever realised4 ,at any rate1 we shall meet on the top4 ,i often think that your whole method of gaining truth must be unlike mine4 ,i use my reason1 but ,i am more than half affection1 and it is that which helps me most4 ,my strange love for some men makes me seek to live their lives1 to see the world as they see it2 above all1 it forces me to pray4 ,prayer never seems to me irrational2 yet ,i do not pray so much because my reason bids me as because my affection forces me4 ,i sometimes feel that ,i should go mad if ,i didn't or couldn't4 ,and then1 again1 ,i am incapable of telling them all ,i feel1 and ,i have to find some one to tell it to1 and ,i feel forced back on ,one who knows me through and through1 and ,i find comfort in pouring out my soul to ,him--in telling ,him all1 much that ,i dare say to no one else--in letting ,him sift the good and evil--in asking ,him to develop and satisfy the good1 and to exterminate the evil4 ,i cannot help trusting ,him4 ,i know not where ,his islands lift ,their fronded palms in air2 ,i only know ,i cannot drift ,beyond ,his love and care4 ,you will tell me perhaps that ,i am too much like a woman in matters of faith4 ,yet so ,i am made4 ,i must follow the lead of my whole being--not of my mind alone4 ,i often wonder how it is that ,i love with such a strange1 passionate1 unutterable affection1 and whether many men are like me4 #aci ,i am most pleased to hear of your doings1 especially of your whist parties4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h41 chaplain on board ,h4,m4,s4 ,canopus4 ,brislington2 ,april #aj1 #aija4 ,i am glad that you like your 'parish4' ,i feel more and more that ,i should prefer being among sailors to being among soldiers4 ,i am afraid that ,i should do little good among either4 ,still ,i like1 or think that ,i should like1 naval officers even more than army officers4 ,if they do talk a great deal of 'shop1' that is a healthy sign4 ,i only wish our officers in the army were--,i will not say more proud of their profession 7for they have1 ,i dare say1 sufficient pride7--but more anxious to learn and to think out matters connected with it4 ,i dare say the naval officer is obliged to act more independently and to think for himself in an emergency2 for the army discipline is carried to such an extreme that the man for some years has seldom any occasion to act on his own initiative--to rise to an occasion4 ,he simply has to ask a superior what to do next4 ,he tends to resemble the ,hindu station-master who telegraphed ',tiger on platform2 please wire instructions4' ,if their talking shop is worrying occasionally1 yet be of good comfort1 it is on the whole a good sign4 ,it is better than talking golf or polo all day1 and better far than loose and unmanly conversation4 ,the more you are interested in the matters yourself1 not simply because you want to be all things to all men1 if by any means you may gain one or two1 but because you are a man #adj and a ,christian1 and therefore all things human have an interest to you1 the more you will enjoy such 'shop4' ,we want not only to affect an interest in what is of vital concern to our neighbours1 but to feel it4 ,i begin to realise more now than ,i used to that ,i must not simply watch football matches1 or run with the boats1 because ,i want to show interest1 but because ,i am learning--however late in the day and however imperfectly--to feel a real concern for such matters4 ,and1 strange to say1 ,i am more interested in them than ,i used to be4 ,since the ,lord took human flesh and interested ,himself in all human life1 ,he has left us an example that we may follow in ,his steps4 ,we must call nothing1 and no man1 common or unclean4 ,my own life and my own interests are terribly contracted4 ,sometimes ,i have been foolish enough to glory in the fact1 and to think that ,i honour ,god in caring only for my brother's soul and not for his whole life4 ,but love has taught me that this is a low and incomplete view4 ,god numbers the very hairs of our head1 and he who loves and tries to help another must enter into his life and care for all that he cares for4 ,i hope that ,god will spare me a little longer to work in ,college1 and to learn to become one with others--to see life with their eyes1 to let them teach me--that so1 if it please ,him1 ,i may gain some of them for ,his service4 ,the disciple cannot expect to be above the ,master4 ,the ,master was not popular4 ,he explained ,his deepest teaching to a few--a very few4 ,if you have one or two to whom you can explain part of your being1 thank ,god4 ,you will find that #ada one man understands one side1 another appreciates another side4 ,it is a comfort that there is ,one who knows us through and through4 ,what a terrible blank life would be if we had no ,god to whom to pour out our whole soul6 ,there are sides of our being which no one but ,god seems to be able to apprehend4 ,i am feeling now comfort at nights in simply telling ,him all--feelings which ,i cannot explain to any one else1 asking ,him to interpret1 to sift1 to allow the better to live1 to annihilate the untrue4 ,i do not cease to expect great things from ,him1 to expect that ,he will do for my 'parish' as a whole more than ,i have dreamed of or wished for4 ,but then ,i am content if ,he works slowly1 and does what ,i did not wish or expect to happen4 ,he works slowly in nature1 and ,i am not surprised if human nature is still more stubborn material for ,him to work upon4 ,but what a joy it is when one character in which we are interested1 for which we have prayed and wrestled in prayer1 shows slight but sure signs of healthy development6 ,i feel inclined to shout for joy at the miracle--for it is a miracle--and ,i thank ,god and take courage4 ,he does not let us see many results1 but ,he lets us see just enough to help us to go forward4 ,it is a help when what is clear and true to us begins to dawn upon another4 ',my belief gains infinitely1' says ,novalis1 'when it is shared by any human soul4' ,let your 'parish' clearly see that 'it is one thing to be tempted1 another thing to fall4' ,vile1 foul thoughts which come to us are not in themselves a sign that we are falling4 ,they are first of all from #adb outside1 and are suggestions entirely alien in origin from ourselves2 they are from the devil4 ,they only become wrong when entertained1 when welcomed in the least degree as guests and allowed to stay4 ,our aim is to bring every thought at once into captivity4 ,i have just come back from the seaside1 and as ,i looked at the sea ,i thought more than once of 'the ocean of ,thy love4' ,the waves of the sea beat against a stubborn rock and seem to make no impression4 ,but in a few years' time the rock begins to yield4 ,the constant wash of the waves wears it away4 ,so with our hard1 stubborn wills4 ,the ocean of ,his love will reduce them slowly but surely1 and likewise the stubborn wills of men around us1 thank ,god6 ,when you are tired and human strength gives way1 remember 'the best of all is--,god is with us4' ,i often feel worn out1 and then ,i love1 as it were1 to lean back upon ,him--without speaking--as a child on its mother's arms4 ,i know not where ,his islands lift ,their fronded palms in air2 ,i only know ,i cannot drift ,beyond ,his love and care4 ,o brother6 if my faith is vain1 ,if hopes like these betray1 ,pray for me that ,i too may gain ,the sure and safer way4 ,and ,thou1 ,o ,god1 by whom are seen ,thy creatures as they be1 ,forgive me if too close ,i lean ,my human heart on ,thee4#a #adc ,i am1 ,i fear1 but a poor friend4 ,i wish you had some one who loved you as well as ,i did1 and who was less weak and selfish4 ,you must not give me up in spite of my defects4 ,i love you and am proud of you--proud to think that you are doing work among men whom ,i should be powerless to influence4 ,easter once more brings new life and hope4 ,may the ,god of all life1 of all peace1 of all hope1 be with you and all your flock6 ,may ,he guide pastor and sheep6 ,don't despair2 go on manfully2 you are doing greater work than you know1 and if your eyes were open that you could see1 you would find that the host that was with you was more than all that were against you4 ,into ,his keeping ,i commit you4 ,good-bye4 ,your friend ,,forbes4 #a ,whittier4 ,to ,w4 ,o4 ,brislington3 ,april #aija4 ,i am glad that the lot has fallen to you in fair places4 ',it has been said with true wisdom that ,god means man not only to work but to be happy in his work4 4 4 4 ,without some sunshine we can never ripen into what we are meant to be4' ,so writes ,dr4 ,hort4 ,i am reading his ,life with great joy4 ,he drank deep of life1 and ,i want to do so also4 ,i want to live in the present--in the sunshine of eternity4 ,i feel more and more inclined to thank ,god for life and all the good things it brings1 and for the friends ,he has given me1 and the measure of strength and health to use in the service of man4 ,i had no idea where that ,essay had gone4 ,i #add suppose it is most immature and unsatisfactory2 yet the central idea1 however imperfectly expressed1 must surely be true4 ,he took ,manhood--in its weakness and strength--up into ,god4 ,he was tempted4 ,that thought helps me immensely4 ',it is one thing to be tempted1 another thing to fall4' ,we often accuse ourselves wrongly when foul thoughts spring up within us4 ,they are temptations from without--from the devil4 ,they only become sins when entertained as welcome guests4 ,i have lately thought that ,christ's life1 like ours1 was a life of faith1 that it needed a real and constant effort of faith for ,him to realise ,his relationship with the unseen ,father4 ,here and hereafter human life is based on faith4 ,if we get this idea into our minds1 ,christ's temptations become more real4 ,they are temptations to faithlessness4 ,i like your idea that ,christ has entered into our manhood1 into the phases 7if there be such7 'of the life to come4' ,rest in the ,lord4 ,this thought comes home to me more than it used to do4 ,i like to bring all the perplexities of life--the thoughts and feelings which ,i can explain to no one--of some of which ,i cannot say whether they are right or wrong1 or where the right shades into wrong--and to leave them with ,him to develop 7if right71 to sift1 to correct4 ,what a blank life would be without ,god6 4 4 4 ,easter brings fresh hope and life4 ,it is glorious to begin existence in a world which has been redeemed4 ,i am sure--since ,he rose and defeated death--we ought to trust to life1 to delight in it4 ',i am the ,life4' #ade ,breathe in the fresh air4 ,it is one of the best gifts that the good ,god has bestowed upon us4 ,we want fresh air not only in our lungs but all through1 if ,i may say so1 our being4 ,i long to be more natural and happy--not that ,i wish for 'religious happiness1' but something quite different--the happiness which comes in the right exercise of power and in conscious dependence upon ,him in whom we live4 ,in reply to a letter from ,h4 ,p41 a master at ,clifton ,college1 who was in doubt whether he ought to resign his mastership and go down to the ,college ,mission in ,bristol4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,may #a1 #aija4 ,i have not had time to think over the matter yet1 but my first feeling is that you ought to be very slow to move4 ,if men in your position1 who feel keenly interested in the highest welfare of their pupils and long to influence them in spiritual matters1 all go away to parish work1 what is to become of our public school boys8 ,masters are only too anxious to leave for more 'directly spiritual' work1 as they say4 ,but in doing so they leave a work of exceptional difficulty and importance behind1 and who is to take their place8 ,i understand and appreciate your feelings1 but ,i am not at all sure that you have any call to go4 ,how much directly 'spiritual' work have you with the boys8 ,could you1 if you desired1 get more8 ,i will pray over the matter4 ,do be slow before you decide to leave4 ,i believe you ought to stay1 #adf although it may be more difficult to maintain your own spiritual life and ideals in a school than in a parish4 ,you may be doing more good than you know4 ,it is easier to find men to do parish work than to do school work of the highest kind4 ,there is a sermon of ,lightfoot's in which he urges clergymen at the ,university not to go away1 because it is hard to maintain their spiritual ideals at ,cambridge1 and because they seem to have so little direct spiritual influence4 ,may not this apply to your work also8 ,to one about to be ordained4 ,cambridge3 ,may #aija4 ,it seems so clear to us that you have a call1 that ,i find it hard to realise that you yourself are uncertain4 ,but the very fact that you have been 'counting the cost1' and that you have no ecstatic joy at the prospect before you1 encourages me4 ,i am glad you realise the difficulties beforehand4 ,what you don't fully see is the strength upon which you will be able to draw4 ,i often think of those lines of ,tennyson3-- ,o living ,will that shalt endure ,when all that seems shall suffer shock1 ,rise in the spiritual rock1 ,flow through our deeds and make them pure4#a ,that ,will can transform our will1 and the very weakness of our natural will is then a help4 ,the strength #adg is seen and felt to come from an invisible source3 ',thy will1 not my will4' ,the terrible need of men to fight against the forces of evil impresses me4 ,the call is so loud on every side4 ,and if men like you cannot hear it1 ,i am driven almost to despair4 4 4 4 ,i often think of my father's words on his deathbed3 ',if ,i had a thousand lives ,i would give them all--all to the ministry4' ,the thought that gave me comfort at my own ordination was a text suggested to me by my brother3 ',he had in ,his right hand seven stars4' ,in ,his right hand--we are safe there4 ,i felt such a worm as ,i had never felt before4 ',but fear not1 thou worm ,jacob4' 4 4 4 ,don't look for happiness or peace at this time1 but for the presence and power 7whether felt or unfelt7 of that ,god whom we both love and try to love better4 ,do not persuade yourself that you do not love ,god4 ,you do1 more than you have any idea of4 ,the part of your ',ego' which you would least wish to lose is not even your love for men--but for ,god4 ,if you had your choice now1 and had to decide what part of your being you would retain for eternity1 it would be the latter4 ,beloved1 if our heart condemn us1 ,god is greater than our heart4 4 4 4 ',he who loves makes his own the grandeur that he loves4' ,he had in ,his right hand seven stars4 ,he is the ,judge1 but ,he also is our refuge and strength and hope4 #a ,in ,memoriam1 cxxi4 #adh ,to ,d4 ,b4 ,k4 ,cambridge3 ,july #aija4 ,when we set to work to help others we discover something of our own weakness4 ,but along with that discovery comes the realisation of an inexhaustible fund of strength outside ourselves4 ,we are fighting on the winning side4 ,god must be stronger than all that opposes4 ,it is uphill work1 especially at first4 ,but just as in learning a language or learning how to swim1 after toiling on with no apparent result1 there comes a day when suddenly we realise that we can do it--how we know not3 so it is in spiritual matters4 ,there is effort still1 sometimes gruesome effort2 but it is all different from what it was4 ,we find the meaning of the paradox1 ',whose service is perfect freedom4' ,love takes the place of law1 and1 although it is hard at times to serve ,god1 it is still harder to be the permanent servant of ,satan4 ,your enthusiasm ought to increase1 the more you look life in the face and see its sin and misery4 ',god1' said ,moody1 'can do nothing with a man who has ceased to hope4' ,our hope in the possibilities of the individual and of society ought to grow brighter and saner as time goes on4 4 4 4 ,missionary work--,i have often wished to do it myself1 but have been 'let hitherto4' 4 4 4 ,it is a tremendous help to me to know that we are both serving the same ,master and that ,i can trust you to ,his love4 #adi ,to an ,auckland 'brother' after ,bishop ,westcott's ,death4 ,cambridge3 ,august #aija4 ,my thoughts are with you at this time4 ,i am most thankful that you have been a year with that man of ,god1 and have gained ideals and inspiration for work which will haunt you all your life long4 ,in moments of weakness1 at times 'when your light is low1' the memory of his strenuous1 holy life will be a power making for self-discipline and righteousness4 ,and it is more than a memory4 ,for he taught us by word and deed that we are all one man1 that those who have realised what it is to belong to the body here will enter more fully into its life there4 ',we feebly struggle1 they in glory shine'--yet we are verily and indeed one4 ,that thought is often a comfort to me4 ,when ,i feel the contradictions and perplexities and weaknesses of my own life1 ,i love to think that ,i am part of a whole--that ,i belong to the same body and share in the same spirit as some other man who is immeasurably my superior4 ,when one whom we have known and venerated on earth passes to the eternal home1 it seems more like home than it was before4 ,it is peopled not only with countless saints of whom ,i have heard1 but with one whom ,i have known and seen1 and hope to see again4 ,his prayers for us1 his influence upon us there are more effective than they could have been here4 ,the great triumph of ,christianity is to produce a few saints4 ,they raise our ideal of humanity4 ,they #aej make us restless and discontented with our own lives1 as long as they are lived on a lower plane4 ,they speak to us in language more eloquent than words3 ',come up higher4' ,to ,f4 ,j4 ,c4 ,belvedere ,hotel1 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,sunday1 ,december #ae1 #aija4 ,i feel more and more thankful that ,i have not had to wait till the next world to know ,god's true nature and character and will4 ,it is passing strange that ,he should love us so much1 and wish to unveil ,himself to us1 'that we might be a kind of firstfruits of ,his creatures4' ,but that phrase 'stewards of ,his mysteries' almost appals me4 ,a steward must be faithful1 and must render an account of the way in which he has used his master's goods4 ,god grant that at the final reckoning we may not be found unprofitable servants4 ,how those simple words in the twenty-third ,psalm satisfy us more and more as life advances1 and as we realise that ,he is not our ,shepherd only1 but the chief ,shepherd of the whole flock1 and that ,he has yet other sheep whom ,he is looking for1 and whom ,he will teach to hear ,his voice amid the babel tongues of the world4 ,it is a comfort to me to feel that ,he has no private blessings for me apart from the rest of the family--that we are one in ,him1 and that each blessing unites us not only to the ,head of the family1 but to all the brothers within it4 ,i suppose at first it is hard to realise the unseen world for long together4 ,but gradually that world #aea dominates our being1 and interprets the world we see1 and makes all life intelligible and well worth the living4 ,to ,h4 ,j4 ,b4 ,hotel ,belvedere1 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,december #af1 #aija4 ,i feel a new man now in this fresh mountain air4 ,if ,i always lived here ,i might be good for something4 ,what a parable of life6 ,if we could live in the higher world and breathe in its air1 what strong1 healthy men we should be6 ,i stayed a night once with ,westcott1 and it seemed to me that he lived and moved and had his being in a higher region1 to which ,i now and then came as a stranger1 and he could see habitually1 what ,i sometimes saw1 the way of ,god in human life4 ,i am sure we are meant to have our home in that higher world1 and that we only see life sanely1 steadily1 and in its true proportions1 when we view it from that vantage ground4 ,i have always been thankful that ,i spent that night with ,westcott1 and thereby gained1 not simply fresh inspiration1 but a radically new revelation of human life and its possibilities4 ,it gave me an insight into the dignity and the destiny of our common human nature4 ,you have never been long absent from my thoughts1 and at last ,i have had time and strength to begin to pray for you as ,i could wish4 ,it is the only way in which ,i can show my gratitude to you4 ,i don't understand much about prayer1 but ,i think of that strange1 bold parable of the unrighteous judge and the widow1 and ,i take my stand on that4 ,i shall #aeb not be content until your true self is formed2 and ,i think that ,god must be very ready to answer the prayer1 however imperfect its form may be1 of one who loves another more than he can understand4 ,i like ,st ,paul's words3 teknia mou ous odino mechris ou morphothe ,christos en humin4 ,only ,i wish ,i were not such a worm myself4 ,however1 the thought of you compels me to live a better life4 ,if ,i could only make all my thoughts of you into prayers and actions for you ,i should be more content4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrase in the above paragraph was transliterated as follows3 teknia--tau1 epsilon1 kappa1 nu1 iota1 alpha2 mou--mu1 omicron1 upsilon2 ous--omicron1 upsilon1 final sigma2 odino--omega1 delta1 iota1 nu1 omega2 mechris--mu1 epsilon1 chi1 rho1 iota1 final sigma2 ou--omicron1 upsilon2 morphothe--mu1 omicron1 rho1 phi1 omega1 theta1 eta2 ,christos--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 final sigma2 en--epsilon1 nu2 humin--7rough breathing mark7 upsilon1 mu1 iota1 nu ,don't imitate ,uriah ,heep with ',yours most humbly4' ,i won't stand that nonsense6 and you give yourself away just a few lines above1 when you assert that you are too proud to confer a favour on me1 and read ,greek ,testament with me4 ,what a funny chap you are6 ,can't you see1 you idiot1 what a pleasure you give me8 ,we shall have to compromise1 and ,i'll have to make some concession to your pride4 ,neither ---- nor ,i know much about your section1 but we could help you in your first part papers4 ,of course1 he could do it miles better than ,i can2 but1 all the same1 you are going to be my pupil4 ,promise me that you won't make any arrangement with him until you have talked the matter over with me4 ,i'll make some compromise for the sake of your miserable pride1 you wretched creature4 ,write to me soon again1 if it isn't a great bore4 ,i can't recall as much as ,i could wish of your conversations with me4 ,in fact1 ,i have the unpleasant feeling sometimes that ,i did too much of the talking6 ,but one or two things that you said to me live in #aec my memory1 and make me wish to be more fit to talk to you4 ,st4 ,moritz is much as usual4 ,it is a strange little world in itself4 ,the comic and the tragic are blended weirdly together1 and nature is unimaginably beautiful4 ,i wish you could see this snow4 ,it has an attraction for me1 and ,i am sure it would have for you4 ,i think you understand more about the meaning of beauty than ,i do4 ,when ,i see a magnificent landscape1 ,i want to share the sight with some one else4 ,i feel quite lonely when ,i am interpreting it alone4 ,i wonder why that is8 ,to ,f4 ,j4 ,c4 ,hotel ,belvedere1 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,december #ba1 #aija4 ,christmas seems to mean more to me1 the longer that ,i live4 ,i gaze with bewilderment on that stupendous mystery of love--the very ,god entering into and raising our human nature4 ,my whole conception of the meaning1 the possibilities of our common human nature is transformed1 as ,i see that it can become a perfect reflection and manifestation of the ,divine nature4 ',the ,word became flesh1 and lodged in us4' ,the manger at ,bethlehem reverses all our human conceptions of dignity and greatness4 ',the folly of ,god is wiser than men4' ,it is to the humble--to babes--that ,god can reveal ,himself4 ,in them ,he can find ,his home4 ,o ,father1 touch the ,east and light ,the light that shone when ,hope was born4 ,it is in ,christmas that ,tennyson found the birth of #aed ,hope4 ,it is ,christmas that1 as life goes on1 bids us never despair--of our own or of human nature around us4 ,to a friend at ,cambridge4 ,hotel ,belvedere1 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,december #cj1 #aija4 ,i shall never forget this last ,christmas ,day1 for your letter came in the evening4 ,i read it again and again1 and wonder at it more each time ,i read it4 ,i can't tell you what ,i feel about it4 ,i knew that you more or less liked and respected me1 but ,i didn't know that you loved me4 ,i've got what ,i wanted4 ,when you merely respected me1 ,i dreaded the day when you would find that ,i was different to what you thought ,i was4 ,but now ,i feel ,i am safe phobos ouk estin en te agape1 however imperfect you find me4 ,i know now that ,i can trust you not to throw me off4 ,and love is not extreme to mark what is amiss1 hoti agape kaluptei plethos amartion4 ,i can't thank you for your kindness1 but ,i thank ,god for giving me the most precious gift in the world1 a human soul 'to love and be loved by for ever4' ,as ,i look at your letter ,i feel a mere worm1 and my one wonder is how on earth a man like you can call me your friend4 ,i can't thank you2 but ,i'll do my best to live up to the standard you expect of me1 and to be a true friend to you4 ,and my idea of friendship is1 as you know1 prayer4 ,i can't1 worse luck1 do much for you1 but ,i do pray for you1 and 'whatever ye ask in prayer1 believing1 ye shall receive4' ,it has been truly said that the how1 the where1 and the when are not told us1 but only the #aee what4 ,and ,i am quite certain that every prayer ,i offer for you is heard and answered1 when ,i believe what ,i say2 but the manner1 the place1 and the occasion of the answer--of these things ,i know nothing4 ,i am sure that ,god loves to see us happy1 and the pure joy of the knowledge that such a man as you loves me is almost more than ,i can bear4 ,it throws a new light on life here1 and on that fuller life to which ,god is leading us hereafter2 like you1 thank ,god1 ,i cannot complain of lack of friends1 but ,i have never had one who has written me such a letter1 full of an affection for which ,i crave4 ,the worst is1 ,i can't repay your kindness4 ,you bring me nearer to ,god1 you make me realise in the strangest way ,his affection1 you make me feel the worth and mystery of a human soul4 ,i wish ,i could return your help somehow or other4 ,do show me the way4 ,i wish you did not find it so difficult to pray for me4 ,i am sure you are right in going back to such a man as ,st4 ,paul for subjects of prayer4 ,the opening chapters of his letters to the ,ephesians and ,colossians give the kinds of requests which it is worth making on behalf of any one4 ,there is surely no harm in finding that1 as you pray for another1 your own faith is growing4 ,there is nothing selfish in that4 ,it is rather the result of the law didote kai dothesetai humin4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 phobos--phi1 omicron1 beta1 omicron1 final sigma2 ouk--omicron1 upsilon1 kappa2 estin--epsilon1 sigma1 tau1 iota1 nu2 en--epsilon1 nu2 te--tau1 eta2 agape--alpha1 gamma1 alpha1 pi1 eta2 hoti--7rough breathing mark7 omicron1 tau1 iota2 agape--alpha1 gamma1 alpha1 pi1 eta2 kaluptei--kappa1 alpha1 lambda1 upsilon1 pi1 tau1 epsilon1 iota2 plethos--pi1 lambda1 eta1 theta1 omicron1 final sigma2 amartion--alpha1 mu1 alpha1 rho1 tau1 iota1 omega1 nu2 didote--delta1 iota1 delta1 omicron1 tau1 epsilon2 kai--kappa1 alpha1 iota2 dothesetai--delta1 omicron1 theta1 eta1 sigma1 eta1 tai1 alpha1 iota2 humin--7rough breathing mark7 upsilon1 mu1 iota1 nu ,your faith can only grow with exercise1 and you exercise it by praying for others4 ,you would only be selfish if you prayed for some one else in order that your own soul might be benefited4 ,but don't think too much of selfishness4 ,bring #aef all your half selfish desires to ,him who knows us through and through2 and in ,his presence1 almost unconsciously1 your motives will gradually be purified4 ,you will learn to walk in the light as ,he ,himself is in the light4 ,as ,i look back on this letter1 a large part of it seems selfish4 ,i expect much is2 but1 even in the selfish parts1 there is something more besides4 ,i can only just say what ,i feel1 and ask ,god gradually to eliminate what is wrong4 ,in ,his light ,i shall see light4 ,life is large1 and ,i am fearful lest1 in attempting a rough and ready asceticism1 ,i should exclude as wrong some elements which are in reality ,god-given4 ,i feel that in the case of our affections and our longing for beauty4 ,they are implanted in us1 and tended and watered by ,one who is perfect ,love and perfect ,beauty4 ,they easily lead us into sin1 but that fact does not imply that they are wrong in themselves4 ,we have to bring them to their source that ,he may interpret them1 ',too late have ,i sought thee1' said ,augustine1 'thou ,beauty1 so ancient and so new1 too late have ,i sought thee4' ,i cannot understand the mystery of your life1 dearest1 but ,i feel that all that craving for beauty is in some kind of way a craving for ,god4 ,only ,god demands the first place in your life before ,he will give you any satisfying interpretation of that aspect of ,his life4 ,you must love ,him for what ,he is--not simply because ,he is ,beauty4 ,i slept and dreamed that life was ,beauty1 ,i woke and found that life is ,duty4 #aeg ,they are not really contradictory conceptions4 ,nay1 ,duty has a spiritual beauty of her own4 ,but sometimes they seem for a moment divergent1 and then you must at all costs choose the latter1 and you will find that ,the topmost crags of ,duty scaled1 ,are close upon that shining tableland ,to which ,god ,himself is shield and sun4 ,and1 if ,i am not mistaken1 that land will be utterly full of an absolutely satisfying beauty4 ,but ,i feel that ,i scarcely yet understand anything about the meaning of ,beauty4 ,all ,i can do is to relate it immediately to ,god4 ,if ,i see beautiful scenery1 ,i am usually thinking of ,god and thanking ,him4 ,if ,i see human beauty1 ,i feel that ,i am on holy ground1 and ,i always try to pray for a face that attracts me4 ,i feel that ,i have a duty in return for the revelation that has been given4 ,but1 as you see1 ,i can explain but little4 ,these are merely rules of practical life which we very imperfectly carry out4 ,i cannot explain the relation of physical and spiritual beauty in human beings4 ,i feel1 of course1 that there ought to be1 there very often is1 some such relation4 ,but sometimes there is something utterly wrong1 and apparently no such connective4 ,the connection1 ,i take it1 is more perfect in nature2 but in man1 why1 something has occurred1 something anomalous1 which mars the whole4 ,sin has come in somewhere1 ,i suppose4 ,i can't express on paper what ,i feel1 or give you any real conception of what you are to me4 ,you #aeh would be startled if you knew4 ,god bless you1 and work out in you1 not my miserable ideal of what ,i think you ought to be1 but ,his own ideal1 which exceeds all our thoughts and imagination1 of what you are to be4 ,to ,g4 ,j4 ,c4 ,christ's ,college3 #aija4 4 4 4 ,i was never so pleased to hear of any engagement as of yours4 ,i thank ,god with all my heart4 ,i cannot put my joy into words1 but somehow or other it seems to bring me nearer to the source of all joy4 ,i feel more than ever that ,he cares for us and is educating us1 and ,i feel that ,he has been so good to you1 because ,he loves you4 ,the older ,i grow the more ,i am impressed by ,his infinite sympathy and concern for us4 ,and when ,he gives us not only love but a return of love1 it seems to me that ,he is giving us the very best thing that ,he has--a part1 as it were1 of ,himself4 ',the merciful and gracious ,lord hath so done ,his marvellous works1 that they ought to be had in remembrance4' ,i cannot tell you how glad ,i am4 ,but ,i thank ,god in my prayers for you2 and ,i am sure that if ,he has been so good to you in the past1 ,he will not forget you in the future4 ,to the same when he had just accepted a mastership at ,eton4 ,brislington1 ,bristol3 #aija4 4 4 4 4 ,how good of you to write and tell me of your future work6 4 4 4 ,the responsibility of such a #aei life is to my mind almost overwhelming4 ',who is sufficient for these things8 ,our sufficiency is of ,god4' ,i am thankful that the offer came as it did--unsought by you4 ,you will feel happier in accepting it4 ',infinite sympathy is needed for the infinite pathos of human life'--more especially of a boy's life4 ,the first1 second1 third1 requisite for a master is1 in my judgment1 sympathy4 ,as ,i look back on my own school days1 ,i cannot help feeling that most of my masters were either lacking in it or else strangely incapable of manifesting it in a form which ,i could understand4 ,sympathy with the dull1 unpromising boy is a divine gift1 and ,i trust that ,holy ,orders will confer upon you this grace also4 ,i thank ,god that you are taking orders1 and finding your work in teaching4 ,forgive this lecture from one who has no right to speak1 and who is himself strangely deficient in sympathy4 ,to ,d4 ,b4 ,k4 ,eastbourne3 ,september #aija4 ,i am glad that you have been home4 ,i feel that home is a revelation--a means whereby the ,eternal ,father shows us ,himself and ,his purposes1 a strengthening and refreshing of our tired souls4 4 4 4 ,i have prayed earnestly for you that your faith and love may not fail4 ,i feel intensely the same difficulty as you1 and ,i am only slowly learning to overcome it4 ,i do not think we can learn to love people who are altogether different from us in many respects1 all at once4 ,i love some men with a strange1 unsatisfied affection4 ,all my thoughts about them ,i am #afj gradually learning to resolve into prayers for them1 and ,i want to live longer that ,i may pray for them more4 ,well1 it seems to me that ,god gives us this affection that we may learn to do to others as we would do to these4 ,i cannot pretend to care for many with whom ,i come into contact as much as ,i do for the few4 ,but ,i can pray for them1 and the feeling will more or less come in time4 ,just try to pray for some one person committed to your charge--say for half an hour or an hour--and you will begin really to love him4 ,as you lay his life before ,god1 as you think of his needs and hopes1 and failings and possibilities1 as you pray earnestly for him as you would for some one whom you feel intense affection for2 at the end of the time you will feel more interested in him1 you will think of him not as one of a class but as a separate1 mysterious person4 ,you will not1 it may be1 have time to pray for many in this way1 but you will learn imperceptibly to extend your sympathy--to feel real love for many more4 ,i advise you to keep a record of these prayers4 ,it is quite worth your while to take practically a day off sometimes1 and to force yourself to pray4 ,it will be the best day's work you have ever done in your life4 ,remember that6 ,don't be troubled by comparing yourself with other clergymen4 ,i think you are like me--not ecclesiastically minded4 ,i don't have the sort of feelings which a large number of persons have about their work and their preaching4 ,i can't put the difference into words1 yet ,i feel it4 ,but ,i must serve ,god in my own way1 and ,i am sure that ,he will use me to do the work for which ,i am best fitted4 ,and the #afa same is true of you4 ,try to refer all your actions to ,his standard2 and test your work in ,his presence2 and don't ask what ,so-and-so thinks of it4 ,i very much wish you had some gentlemen to associate with besides parsons4 ,you must keep up as much as possible with your college friends2 and use every opportunity which reasonably presents itself of seeing some 'society4' ,god knows what is best for you at present4 ,god nothing does or suffers to be done ,but thou wouldest do thyself1 couldest thou but see ,the end of all events as well as ,he4 ,i am sure that ,he will not forget you4 ,he knows what is best for your development4 ,it may be that ,he takes you away from friends that you may learn to pray for them more and to see ,him more clearly4 ,i think you will influence many men whom a more ordinary parson would not touch4 4 4 4 ,i am quite certain that if you have infinite hope--hope against hope--you will be a tremendous power in the place where ,god has put you4 ,get as much exercise as you can1 and always get a clear day off in the week1 and don't give up any of your old interests4 ,don't always read 'religious' literature4 4 4 4 ,when the long day is done and we stand before the judgment seat1 ,i believe that many will rise up and call you blessed4 ,only pray for individuals--for a long time together4 ,to influence1 you must love2 to love1 you must pray4 #afb ,to one about to be ordained4 ,eastbourne3 ,september #aija4 ,i shall indeed remember you on ,sunday next4 ,the words of the lesson come home to me to-day--kai eireken moi ,arkei soi he chariu mou2 he gar dunamis en astheneia teleitai4 ,we are poor creatures1 but there is ,grace--and we can come into contact with it--and that is all we need4 ,we may have failed in the past1 but ,christ offers a new childlike life and endless hope4 ,i am glad to think that you will be returning to your difficult post at ,cambridge4 ,i am sure that you will return to it with fresh humility and courage--en pleromati eulogias ,christou4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraphs were transliterated as follows3 kai--kappa1 alpha1 iota2 eireken--epsilon1 iota1 rho1 eta1 kappa1 epsilon1 nu2 moi--mu1 omicron1 iota2 ,arkei--,alpha1 rho1 kappa1 epsilon1 iota2 soi--sigma1 omicron1 iota2 he--7rough breating mark7 eta2 chariu--chi1 alpha1 rho1 iota1 final sigma2 mou--mu1 omicron1 upsilon2 he--7rough breathing mark7 eta2 gar--gamma1 alpha1 rho2 dunamis--delta1 upsilon2 nu1 alpha1 mu1 iota1 final sigma2 en--epsilon1 nu2 astheneia--alpha1 sigma1 theta1 epsilon1 nu1 epsilon1 iota1 alpha2 teleitai--tau1 epsilon1 lambda1 epsilon1 iota1 tau1 alpha1 iota2 en--en--epsilon1 nu2 pleromati--pi1 lambda1 eta1 rho1 omega1 mu1 alpha1 tau1 iota2 eulogias--epsilon1 upsilon1 lambda1 omicron1 gamma1 iota alpha1 final sigma2 ,christou--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 upsilon ,to ,w4 ,d4 ,h4 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,january #d1 #aijb4 ,i hope that you are now less overworked than you were in ,october4 ,you must at all costs make quiet time4 ,give up work1 if need be4 ,your influence finally depends upon your own first-hand knowledge of the unseen world1 and on your experience of prayer4 ,love and sympathy and tact and insight are born of prayer4 ,i am glad you have a ,junior ,clergy ,s4 ,p4 ,g4 ,association4 ,try to take an intelligent interest in it1 and mind you read a paper before long4 ,to his brother ,edward in ,south ,africa4 ,hotel ,belvedere1 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,january #g1 #aijb4 ,i am glad to think that we are now in many respects agreed about the general question of the #afc war4 ,i suppose in any great historical upheaval there are at the time a number of people who are attempting to make capital for themselves out of the misfortunes of others2 there are many who are working for their own hand2 and yet1 when we look back on the crisis and judge it as a whole in the calm light of history1 we see that a large and rational purpose has been worked out4 ,at the time of the ,english ,reformation--as some one was saying to me lately1 pointing the parallel which ,i am working out--there must have been a number of honest and pure souls who held aloof from the whole of what appeared to be political jobbery and fortune-making at the expense of religious sentiment4 ,yet now most of us feel that the movement could not have had the effects that it had1 unless down below all there was a strong upheaval of the national conscience4 ,you will no doubt see many defects in this historical parallel2 but the thought is at any rate suggestive1 and full of what we require in these latter days--hope4 ,of course ,i feel that injustice1 dishonesty1 cruelty1 selfishness are in no way palliated because they take cover and occasion in a real movement of national feeling4 ,i feel for you much in your work for examinations4 ,it must come very hard with ill health and in a hot climate1 with the freshness of youth to some extent passed4 ,but ,o well for him whose will is strong1 ,he suffers1 but he shall not suffer long2 ,he suffers1 but he cannot suffer wrong #afd ,it needs more courage than you were required to show on the field of battle4 ,but the reward is sure4 ,i feel strongly that this life is but the prelude to a larger life1 when each faculty will have its full exercise4 ,ah yet1 when all is thought and said1 ,the heart still overrules the head2 ,still what we hope we must believe1 ,and what is given us receive2 ,must still believe1 for still we hope1 ,that in a world of larger scope1 ,what here is faithfully begun ,will be completed1 not undone4 ,these words come from dough--the soul of honesty4 ,to ,h4 ,j4 ,b4 ,derwent ,hill1 ,ebchester1 ,durham3 ,april #ad1 #aijb4 ,it seems to me a truism to say that we ought to look at life in the light of eternity4 ,only then does the true significance of the meanest action in life appear4 ,life is redeemed from triviality and vulgarity4 ,so far from worldly possessions losing their value1 and ordinary occupations appearing insignificant1 their importance is realised as never before4 ,if man does not live for ever1 his character and actions seem of comparative unimportance4 ,if he does live for ever1 it is rational for him to look at each action in the light of that larger life which he inherits4 ,if something like class distinctions are eternal1 it is an inducement so to use your distinctive privileges here in a worthy manner1 that hereafter you may use them for nobler ends4 #afe ,i have expressed myself badly1 but you will see what ,i want to say4 ,my relations to you surely become not less1 but more important1 when ,i realise that ,i am only beginning to know and love you here4 ,the eternal element in them--the knowledge that there is throughout an implicit reference to a ,third and ,unseen ,person in all that ,i say to you or think of you--fills me with a sense of awe1 and makes the relations more real because more spiritual4 ,to the mother of his godchild1 ,margaret ,forbes4 ,july #f1 #aijb4 ,i cannot tell you what a pleasure it was to see my godchild4 4 4 4 ,i feel she has a strength of purpose and a desire to know the truth which will fit her for high service in ,god's kingdom on earth4 ,i pray for her1 and ,i shall do so in the future with fuller understanding and with great hope4 ,what ,god hath begun ,he will assuredly bring to perfection4 ,i hope that some day she will learn to pray for ,uncle ,forbes4 ,i should value her prayers4 ,it is good to feel that in the midst of your weary time of weakness ,god has given you such a child as a pledge of ,his affection for you1 as an assurance that ,he believes in you4 ,to give you a little child to train for ,himself is a proof that ,he trusts you very much4 ,i do not know that ,he could have given a greater proof of ,his confidence in you4 ,and it is ,god's implicit trust in us that draws out our trust in turn4 ,we trust and love ,him1 because ,he first trusted and loved us4 ,i wonder more and more at the way in which ,he trusts us4 ,to allow us to suffer without #aff telling us the reason1 when ,he knows that we shall be inclined to think harshly of ,him--that is1 perhaps1 the greatest proof that ,he believes in us4 ,he can try our faith and perfect it by long-continued trial1 because ,he knows that we shall respond1 that we shall prove 'worthy to suffer4' ,to ,h4 ,j4 ,b4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,august #bf1 #aijb4 ,the worst of seeing you for some time is that ,i feel it all the more impossible to live without you4 ,i realise now as never before that you are out and away before me1 and better than ,i am2 and yet ,i feel that you are part and parcel of my life4 ,you mustn't be too hard on me if ,i can't come up to your ideal4 ,intellectually the ,hebrew and ,greek ideals may be irreconcilable4 ,yet 'life is larger than logic2' and practically we may become heirs of both ideals4 ,the man who loses the world1 who gives up all without any desire for gain1 is often given the whole back again transfigured1 glorified by sacrifice4 ,to get you must forget4 ,if you love ,god absolutely with all your being1 you inherit the life that is as well as that which is to come4 ,if all is not given you1 yet enough is given for the development of character4 ,but there must1 it seems to me1 be an absolute sacrifice--a surrender of your whole being--whatever the result may be4 ,there must be no calculation4 ,high ,heaven rejects the lore ,of nicely calculated less and more4 #afg ,you must love the ,lord your ,god with all your heart and all your mind3 you must trust ,him to do the best by you4 ,you say the ,hebrew ideal does not appeal to you4 ,but ,i know better2 for you half like me1 and ,i am a ,hebrew of the ,hebrews6 ,there must be a dash of recklessness about the man who gains the other world4 ',all or nothing' is the requirement of the kingdom of ,heaven4 ,to gain yourself you must throw yourself away--'lose your soul4' ,you must have faith4 ',he who loves makes his own the grandeur that he loves' is a sentence of ,emerson which consoles me when ,i think of my love for you4 ,to a friend at ,cambridge4 #dj ,upperton ,gardens1 ,eastbourne3 ,september #h1 #aijb4 ,i have been thinking of you4 ,i keep myself from becoming morbid by making most of my thoughts into prayers for you4 ,the glory--wonder--strangeness of being loved by a man from another and a better world fills me with gratitude to ,god4 ,sometimes it seems a dream1 and ,i half dread that ,i shall wake up and find that you have ceased to care for a worthless creature4 ,but phobos ouk estin en te agape1 all he teleia agape exo ballei ton phobon4 ,i need not fear4 ,i know that you will love me1 whatever happens4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 phobos--phi1 omicron1 beta1 omicron1 final sigma2 ouk--omicron1 upsilon1 kappa2 estin--epsilon1 sigma1 tau1 iota1 nu2 en--epsilon1 nu2 te--tau1 eta2 agape--alpha1 gamma1 alpha1 pi1 eta2 all--alpha1 lambda1 lambda2 he--7rough breathing mark7 eta2 teleia--tau1 epsilon1 lambda1 epsilon1 iota1 alpha2 agape--alpha1 gamma1 alpha1 pi1 eta2 exo--epsilon1 xi1 omega2 ballei--beta1 alpha1 lambda1 lambda1 epsilon1 iota2 ton--tau1 omicron1 nu2 phobon--phi1 omicron1 beta1 omicron1 nu ,i want you to be one of the best men that ever lived--to see ,god and to reveal ,him to men4 ,this is the burden of my prayers4 ,my whole being goes out in passionate entreaty to ,god that ,he will give me what ,i ask4 ,i am sure ,he will1 for the request #afh is after ,his own heart4 ,i do not pray that you may 'succeed in life' or 'get on' in the world4 ,i seldom even pray that you may love me better1 or that ,i may see you oftener in this or any other world--much as ,i crave for this4 ,but ,i ask1 ,i implore1 that ,christ may be formed in you1 that you may be made not in a likeness suggested by my imagination1 but in the image of ,god--that you may realise1 not mine1 but ,his ideal1 however much that ideal may bewilder me1 however little ,i may fail to recognise it when it is created4 ,i hate the thought that out of love for me you should accept my presentation--my feeble idea--of the ,christ4 ,i want ,god to reveal ,his ,son in you independently of me--to give you a first-hand knowledge of ,him whom ,i am only beginning to see4 ,sometimes more selfish thoughts will intrude1 but this represents the main current of my prayers2 and if the ideal is to be won from heaven by importunity1 by ceaseless begging1 ,i think ,i shall get it for you4 ,but it grieves me to think that ,i can do nothing else for you4 ,to receive so many favours from you1 and to be incapable of doing more in return--this is what saddens me4 ,i feel an ungrateful brute4 ,you have brought new joy1 hope1 power into my life1 and ,i want to show my gratitude4 ,you would be doing me a real kindness if you would tell me how ,i could show it4 ,don't think by what ,i have said that ,i simply care--as an ',evangelical' would say--for your 'soul4' ,every part of your being--everything you do or say--all that you are--has a strange fascination for me4 ,only ,i feel that the whole of it is a revelation of #afi ,god2 and ,i want that revelation to be clearer1 truer1 simpler4 ,i am sure ,god does not only care for our souls4 ,it is every part of our complicated being--all sides of our manifold life--that attracts ,him4 ,he loves our home life1 our affection for the dear old ,mother ,earth which ,he made1 our interest in the men and women whom ,he formed in ,his own image4 ,he longs that all those interests should be developed--that we should live genuine1 sane human lives4 ,but true development here or elsewhere--the law of existence in heaven or on earth--is life through death4 ',verily1 verily1 ,i say unto you1 ,except a grain of wheat fall into the earth and die1 it abideth by itself alone2 but if it die1 it beareth much fruit4' ,you must give up all4 ,as ,i think of you1 those words keep ringing in my ears3 ',if any one cometh to ,me1 and hateth not his own father and mother1 yea1 and his own self also1 he cannot be ,my disciple4' ,i cannot tell you what they mean4 ,you must find them out for yourself4 ,if ,i were a true disciple of ,christ1 you could see what they mean by looking at me4 ,but ,i am not4 ,you must learn their meaning for yourself4 ,your mother's life will speak louder than words of mine4 ,only ,i know they are true4 ,christ will recreate the world1 recreate the home1 human beings1 dear ,mother ,earth2 but ,he cannot do so until you have been willing to give up all--until ,he has caused you to be 'born again4' ,when the ruler asked how these things could be1 ,christ could only repeat ,his words4 ,the man must work it out for himself4 ,but ,i am sure that he that willeth to do the will #agj shall know whether the teaching be true4 ,there are no doubt some mere intellectual obscurities in the ideal which ,i might make simpler if ,i were not such a duffer4 ,but finally a paradox would be left--a paradox which can only be solved by living the ideal out1 and finding it work4 ,it is the pathos of our love1 of ,god's love for us1 that each man1 however much he is loved1 must work out the ideal for himself4 ,no man can save his brother's soul4 ,i do not like to weaken the paradoxes of the ,gospel4 ,i think there is more in ,christ's words concerning 'loving one's life' or 'self' than you suggest4 ,you say it means 'self-denial4' ,yes1 that is true1 but what a tremendous meaning 'deny one's self' has6 ,to disown your identity1 that is not much easier when you come to think of it than to lose your life4 ,i know you will find out what it all means1 and that human love1 beauty1 home1 social service1 will be more real than ever before1 because you will see the eternal reality underneath4 ,you will be a 'new creation4' ,now ,i must stop without satisfactorily answering your question1 without entering into any casuistical questions concerning conformity such as you suggest4 ,i should like you to think out that problem in casuistry more for yourself1 before ,i attempt to answer it4 ,forgive me for talking so much about myself4 ,when all is said and done1 words fail me4 ,i can only thank ,god that you exist1 and that you let me love you4 #aga ,to ,h4 ,p41 a ,clifton ,college master who had given up school work in order to devote himself to the ,school ,mission in ,bristol4 #dj ,upperton ,gardens1 ,eastbourne3 ,september #cj1 #aijb4 4 4 4 ,i am glad that you feel you have done right in giving up your school work4 ,i am sorry that you left ,clifton1 but you thought you ought to go1 and that is an end of the matter4 ,i can only hope that you are in some measure a connecting-link between the school and its mission4 4 4 4 ,don't forget me in my very different work--and yet work for the same ,master--at college4 ,i have need of your prayers4 ,it is so easy to blunder1 and to drive a man further from the kingdom by lack of sympathy and love4 ,i feel more than ,i used to my weakness1 and my absolute need of prayer4 ,to his brother ,edward in ,south ,africa4 #dj ,upperton ,gardens1 ,eastbourne3 ,october #a1 #aijb4 ,the ,october term has an interest of its own1 bringing1 as it does1 a batch of freshmen4 ,i try more and more not simply to impose my ideals upon them1 but to find out their ideals and to quicken them with all my power4 ,but assuredly 'infinite sympathy is needed for the infinite pathos of human life2' and my sympathies are as yet imperfectly developed4 ,still1 as years go by1 ,i think ,i can sympathise more with those who have been trained up in other schools of thought and experience4 ,i was reading in a book lately that we are largely responsible for our #agb own experiences1 that we have a duty to get them of the right kind4 ,the book was by an ,american lady on social questions4 ,i think there is truth in her words4 ,to ,d4 ,b4 ,k41 head of a ,public ,school ,mission4 ,eastbourne3 ,october #aijb4 ,i delight to know men better1 because ,i find so much more in them than ,i had expected4 ,they differ from me1 and ,i try to get out of the habit of making them in my own image1 and try to find the image in which ,god is making them4 ,i have been praying for you4 ,i want a spirit of sanity and sacrifice to possess you1 that you may be able to see the good works which ,god has prepared beforehand that you should walk in them4 4 4 4 ,i am struck by the sacrifice which ,christ demands4 ,unless the man hates father1 mother1 family1 friends1 yea1 and himself also1 he 'cannot be' ,his disciple1 ,christ gives them all back again--only 'with persecutions4' ,we find more in the world1 when we are 'crucified to it1' than ever before2 but there is a something added4 ,we have a deeper joy in home ties1 in human love1 in social life1 in the changing seasons1 in the dear old earth4 ,only the joy has a note of sorrow1 a pathos1 which ,christ calls 'persecutions4' ,we see more in life1 and yet we are in a measure out of sympathy with our surroundings4 ,we have heard and we can never forget the sorrows of those who are 'one man' with us4 ,there is more in that word 'persecutions' than this1 as no doubt #agc you have found4 ,but this1 ,i think1 is part of its signification1 isn't it8 4 4 4 ,i believe in your 'mission' even more than you do4 ,it is men like you1 who through great tribulations strive to enter the ,kingdom1 that ,god uses4 ,the fact that you are two men1 and that the true man--the ,christ--is painfully yet surely being 'formed' in you1 means that you will be able to appeal to others who are painfully conscious of their double consciousness and are often the slaves of the lower1 inhuman self4 ,your wealth of affection will make you feel as ,st4 ,paul did--teknia mou1 ous palin mechris ou morphothe ,christos en humin4 ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 teknia--tau1 epsilon1 kappa1 nu1 iota1 alpha2 mou--mu1 omicron1 upsilon2 ous--omicron1 upsilon1 final sigma2 palin--pi1 alpha1 lambda1 iota1 nu2 mechris--mu1 epsilon1 ch1 rho1 iota1 final sigma2 ou--omicron1 upsilon2 morphothe--mu1 omicron1 rho1 phi1 omega1 theta1 eta2 ,christos--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 final sigma2 en--epsilon1 nu2 humin--7rough breathing mark7 upsilon1 mu1 iota1 nu ,these words sum up for me1 better than any others1 my deepest wish for my friends4 ,i fall back with desperate energy upon prayer1 as the one power by which my wish can be realised4 ,you seem to look ahead almost more than is necessary4 ,i delight in the feeling that ,i am in eternity1 that ,i can serve ,god now fully and effectively1 that the next piece of the road will come in sight when ,i am ready to walk on it ',i do not ask to see the distant scene4' ,i hate the unsettled feeling that ,i have not yet begun my main work4 ,don't measure work by human standards of greatness4 ,your present occupation might well be the envy of angels--if they could envy4 ,but now ,i am lecturing4 ,so it is time to shut up4 4 4 4 ,i fear that the origin of evil is more of a mystery to me now than when ,i wrote that essay6 ,but ,i still think that we are fighting a real being1 one whom #agd we can best describe as personal4 ,his will1 it seems to me1 must be given to him by ,god4 ,he has identified it with a hitherto unrealised potentiality for disobedience4 ,in plain language1 his will is free1 and therefore capable of resisting ,god4 ,i should like to have a talk with you some day about it4 ,but1 as you see1 the problem is beyond me4 4 4 4 ,it is a strength to me to feel that you are fighting the devil in yourself and others up in ----1 and that ,i am 'one man' with you4 ,to ,d4 ,b4 ,k4 ,st4 ,moritz3 ,january #aijc4 ,it is getting on for your birthday1 isn't it8 ,congratulations4 ,i wish ,i knew the exact day4 ,i think more and more that a birthday is a subject not--as poor ,job thought--for anathemas1 but for congratulations4 ,to be a reasonable human being--with capacity for seeing something of ,god's purposes for the race--with power to forward them--with opportunities for love and sacrifice and prayer--oh6 ,i am so glad that ,i was not a mere animal4 ,and to be born at the end of the nineteenth century--,i prefer that period even to ,apostolic times4 ,we can know more of ,god's purposes1 enter more deeply into ,his mind and even ,his heart1 than primitive ,christians4 ,i have been reading to-day ,temple's essay on ',the ,education of the ,world' in ',essays and ,reviews4' ,get hold of an old copy of that book1 and read it4 ,it is strong and manly1 and rings true4 ,i #age love that old man with his tenderness1 simplicity1 thoughtfulness1 and will of steel4 ,i thank ,god for him4 ,there is something about utter goodness which makes me worship1 and fills me with the challenge1 ',go and do thou likewise4' ,goodness is as infectious as any disease4 ,i have been thinking lately of the self-sacrifice of ,god's life4 ,i suppose that is the reason why ,he can enter into our lives--see them from the inside4 ,thou canst conceive our highest and our lowest1 ,pulses of nobleness and aches of shame4 ,it must have been the wealth of ,his self-sacrifice which made ,him give us selves--wills--of our own4 ,then ,he makes them ,his own by more self-sacrifice4 ,we are made in ,his image--made to go out of self1 and find our self by losing it4 ,other men at first seem to limit our freedom1 but later we find that the apparent limitations are only just scope for realising our true self4 ,each time we go out of self1 and enter into another 'ego1' we return the richer for our sacrifice4 ,we take up other lives into our own1 and are richer than a millionaire4 ,i think that when the other 'ego' is most unlike our own--when at first sight the man is repulsive1 and 7worse still7 uninteresting to us--when the sacrifice is great1 if we would see life through his eyes1 share his ambitions1 fears1 longings1 and mental outlook1 then is the time when we are peculiarly rewarded for our pains4 ,our consciousness is larger1 more human1 more divine than before4 ',by feeblest agents doth our ,god fulfil ,his #agf righteous will' is the thought suggested by some of our brother-clergy4 ,god does not choose the agents we should choose4 ,or perhaps the latter do not respond to ,his choice4 ,yet ,i feel that ,i am one of them1 and that it is my faults writ large which ,i detest in them4 ,i feel that1 with all the riches of the revelation which ,i possess1 ,i have that same self-satisfaction and lack of sympathy which ,i loathe in others4 ,it is my life which is the stumbling-block to my message4 ,they have often far less light than ,i have1 but walk in it more simply than ,i do4 ,the rafter in my own eye troubles me even more than the speck in theirs4 ,but it is hard1 ,god knows1 sometimes to feel ,his presence in their presence4 ,but the forces of good must be united 7',keep1 ah6 keep them combined4 ,else 4 4 4'71 and if by any effort we can enter into their lives1 and transcend the barriers between us1 we are not only enriching our own life1 but we are doing our best to show a combined front against the almost overwhelming forces of evil4 ,even the ,apostles must have found it hard to work together4 ,we know they did4 ,look at ,peter and ,paul4 ,yet the spirit of unity was stronger than all that opposed ,him1 and the ,one ,body was in some measure realised4 ,what was difficult in the childhood of the ,body is still more difficult in its manhood4 ,and ,englishmen1 with their strong sense of individuality1 find it a terrible lesson to learn4 ,but pray4 ,you enter then into another man's 'ego4' ,you see him in ,god4 ,you see him as an end in himself4 ,remember ,kant's maxim--a wonderful maxim from one who would not1 ,i suppose1 be #agg technically called a ,christian--',treat humanity1 whether in thyself or in another1 always as an end1 not simply as a means4' ,put aside a certain amount of time1 and pray for one man4 ,if your thoughts wander1 do not be disturbed1 do not try to find when they began or how they began to wander2 do not despair1 go back to the subject in hand4 ,and ,god will have mercy4 ,your influence1 your life1 your all1 depends on prayer4 ,we must faint sometimes4 ,but let your saddest times1 your deepest struggles be known to ,god4 ,gain there the strength and quietness which you need for life4 ,but don't let men see the agony--let them see the peace which comes from wrestling alone with ,god--wrestling for them4 ,you are not one man1 but two or three4 ,thank ,god for that4 ,it means that you will have a hard life--an awful struggle with self or selves3 but it also means more influence1 more power to enter into man's life4 ,so many of the finest men owe their attractiveness to their diverse1 many-sided nature4 ,you will be able to feel for such1 and perhaps to help them4 ,you are half a ,greek with your yearning for beauty and knowledge1 half a ,hebrew with your loathing for sin and love of ,god4 ,the ,greek in you must not be annihilated1 but it must be subordinated to the ,hebrew4 ,conscience must be absolute master4 ,you must sacrifice the ',greek' to ,christ2 but ,he will give you back what is best in the ,greek ideal1 all the better for the mark of the ,cross on it4 ,he will give it you back partly in this world1 partly in the next1 when you have learnt to renounce it--if need #agh were1 for ever--for ,his sake4 ,but you must give up all for ,him without thought of reward4 ,he can give no reward to the man who is looking for it4 ,the thought of your life helps me4 ,go on1 for the night cometh when no man can work4 ,thank ,god it is yet day4 ,to his brother ,edward in ,south ,africa4 ,mhlen1 ,switzerland3 ,january #aa1 #aijc4 ,i found walking a pleasant change after reading philosophy1 which ,i have been doing during my holidays4 ,i seem to have been getting my ideas a little clearer1 and am no longer as content as ,i was with the ,kantian doctrine1 that our knowledge in speculative matters never gets beyond 'appearances4' ,i feel that at every turn we do get to that which is--to an underlying reality4 ,i cannot feel that ,kant's hard and fast division between 'speculative' and 'moral' reason holds good4 ,the external world1 because it is intelligible1 must be akin to us2 there must be an intelligence in it1 otherwise it would never become an object of knowledge to our intelligence4 ,it is not only in our ethical life that we come across the absolute consciousness4 ,i feel now more than ever how we cannot divide up ourselves into water-tight compartments1 and think of reason1 will1 and feeling as separate things1 lying side by side4 ,they can be separated--abstracted--in thought1 but in actual life you never find one without the other4 ,we cannot think without some degree of attention1 and attention involves an exercise of will1 and will cannot #agi be exercised without desire1 and desire involves feeling4 ,i think faith also cannot be regarded as a separate faculty4 ,reason1 will1 and feeling are all involved even in the faith of a poor cottager2 much more does reason enter into the faith of a thoughtful man4 ,i have been reading ,butler1 and hope when ,i go back to study ,hume4 ,what a wealth of light the conception of ',development' has shed upon the problems which exercised the eighteenth century6 ,i have read half through ,leslie ,stephen's ',thought in the ,eighteenth ,century1' and ,i have been struck again and again at the new aspect that the old questions take when looked at from the standpoint of ,evolution4 ,i feel also that we need to study more the evolution of thought--the necessary phases that reason 7like man's physical life7 must pass through before perfection4 4 4 4 ,i think you are right1 that education must now include instruction in imperial ideas--in our relations with that larger social life which is dawning upon us--a step towards a still larger social life to be realised in the brotherhood of nations4 ,to ,f4 ,j4 ,c4 ,christ's ,college1 ,cambridge3 ,february #a1 #aijc4 ,i am slow to suggest to another man that what seems bad luck is in reality the voice of ,god making itself felt in his busy life1 calling him to fuller sacrifice4 ,but ,i am sure that we are right when we interpret it #ahj thus for ourselves4 ,i share your wish for 'some really strong man' to come as a prophet and read the writing on the wall1 and tell us 'what it all means4' ,yet the absence of human help is not accidental4 ,it must be designed1 in order that we may learn to fall back on the everlasting arms--to find by experience that the unseen is more real than the seen4 ,there is an arm that never tires ,when human strength gives way4 ,i like that phrase1 'worthy to suffer4' ,it is to those whom ,god loves best and most that ,he gives--as ,he gave to ,his ,son--the chance of suffering4 ,sympathy1 strength1 reality--these are some of its fruits for those who allow them to grow4 ',he cannot be ,my disciple4' ,i can't help sometimes thinking of these words4 ,unless the man is prepared to make sacrifice the basis of his life1 he cannot be ,christ's disciple4 ,i don't think we always realise the 'trans-valuation of values' found in ,christ's teaching4 ',blessed are the poor--the hungry4 ,he that would save his life shall lose it4 ,he that loseth1 saveth4 ,he that would be greatest shall be least4 ,it is more blessed to give than to receive4' ,as ,i think over such statements as these1 ,i find that ,i have again and again to revise1 as it were1 my moral arithmetic--to change my standards1 to revise my ideas of great and little1 happiness and misery1 importance and insignificance4 ,i am sure that nothing but the highest will satisfy you4 ,god has given you singular powers of influence and of attracting others4 ,he will demand an account #aha of those powers4 ,you know ,matthew ,arnold's lines on his father4 ,i believe the day will come when men will say like words of you4 ,but thou would'st not alone ,be saved1 my father6 alone ,conquer and come to thy goal1 ,leaving the rest in the wild4 4 4 4 ,therefore to thee it was given ,many to save with thyself4 ,that is what ,i want you to be--a tower of strength--strength perfected1 it may be1 in weakness--weakness forcing you to despair of self1 and find the ,rock of ,ages4 ,you have been so much to me1 and helped me so often1 that ,i feel you must be born to help others as well4 ,and this quiet time1 it may be that ,god is using it to call you closer to ,himself1 to teach you to revise your 'values1' to show you a new fund of strength4 ,our wills are ours1 we know not how1 ,our wills are ours1 to make them ,thine4 ,you must--literally must--let ,his will overpower your will4 ,nothing but complete sacrifice will satisfy you or ,him1 and ,i believe in you profoundly4 ,i am sure that1 whatever be the ghastly struggle1 you will go through with it1 and find your strength in ,him4 ,i pray for you4 ,to his mother4 ,cambridge2 ,march #ae1 #aijc4 ,the term is almost over 4 4 4 ,i am enjoying a quiet ,sunday4 ,what a blessing these ,sundays are #ahb to us--a foretaste of a fuller life of service and worship hereafter6 ,i have been thinking lately with comfort of the quiet perpetual work of the ,holy ,spirit1 silently but surely leading us on to higher things--comforting1 correcting1 guiding4 ,it gives ground for hope in dealing with men1 this knowledge that there is ,one who perfects what we feebly struggle to begin1 who watches over men with a love that will not let them go4 ,we are not alone in our work2 we have omnipotence and illimitable wisdom on our side1 forwarding our efforts4 ,when ,i consider what the ,spirit has accomplished in my own life1 ,i have large hope for others4 ,the argument from personal experience is singularly convincing4 ',the fellowship of the ,holy ,ghost'--it is ,he who unites men and interprets them one to the other4 ,it is ,he who gives spirit and life to our words4 ,to ,h4 ,j4 ,b4 ,bexley ,house1 ,cromer3 ,march #ca1 #aijc4 ,it was good of you to send me that card from ,florence4 ,you don't know how glad it made me4 ,to know that you were thinking of me was a strength to me4 ,your love for me comes as a perpetual surprise and inspiration4 ,i feel a brute compared with you1 but the knowledge that you care for me more than you do for most men makes me feel that ,i must try to be good4 ',in ,italy of the fifteenth century renaissance we see in strange confusion all that we love in art1 and all that we loathe in man6' ,greek history was short compared #ahc with the ,hebrew3 ,i suppose because intellectual and artistic ideals are more easily realised than ethical and religious4 ,it takes time to make a saint4 ,it is part of the discipline of life to find the two sets of ideas apparently antagonistic4 ,there is a higher unity in which they are blended--in ,god ,himself4 ,it must be right to follow the dictates of conscience when it bids us lose our soul if we would gain it4 ,we cannot trust ,god too much4 ,if we forget our self1 ,he will see that our truest self is ultimately realised4 ,i can't express myself well1 for ,i have just finished a spell of hard work4 ,i have sent away my tripos papers to-night4 ,i am going up to ,edinburgh on ,friday or ,saturday4 ,i fear ,i shall not see you until ,april #ba4 ,will you tell ,armitage that ,i will1 if convenient to him1 sleep at ,westminster that night instead of going straight to ,cambridge8 ,the hopelessness of ever showing my gratitude to you or of ever making you realise how much ,i love you oppresses me4 ,i don't know what ,i should do if ,i had not ,one ,higher than ,i am to confide in--if ,i could not leave you in ,his hands--if ,i could not gain strength and life for you by appealing to ,him4 ,o brother1 if my faith is vain1 ,if hopes like these betray1 ,pray for me1 that ,i too may gain ,the sure and safer way4 ,and ,thou1 ,o ,god1 by whom are seen ,thy creatures as they be1 ,forgive me if too close ,i lean ,my human heart on ,thee6 #ahd ,i lean closer and closer as life goes on4 ,i feel that our hope lies in despair--despair of self4 ,the vessels which contain the treasure are1 as to-night's lesson says1 earthen1 'that the excess of the power may be ,god's and not from us4' ,and there is a power1 there is a life working in us4 ,it is the quiet1 sane1 constant work of the ,spirit in and upon our spirit1 that never hastes and never tires3 which gives me comfort for you1 for myself1 for all of us4 ,the same life that is at work in the hedge across the road is in us1 only in us it attains full self-consciousness and freedom4 ,we can deliberately use it or refuse it4 ,forgive the length of the letter4 ,but ,i felt so tired that ,i thought it would do me good to write to you1 selfish brute that ,i am4 ,i expect you enjoyed your time in ,italy immensely4 ,i should have liked to be with you4 ,i wonder if ever we shall be there together8 ,some day we shall be in a world where the barriers of space are broken down3 ',there shall be no more sea4' ,yet it seems to me that we have not altogether to wait for that other world4 ,they are half broken down already2 and if we had faith as a grain of mustard seed1 we should realise the meaning of a unity deeper than any special or temporal bond4 ,if we fail to realise its meaning now1 shall we realise it then8 ,is not life here a training for life hereafter8 ,if we learn nothing in this school1 we shall not be able to take our places in that school of 'broader love4' ,the best part in me does not complain4 ,i thank ,god for ,his thoughtful goodness in bringing you near to me4 ,i thank ,him for the mystery of life1 which enables me to realise that #ahe ,power 'which lives not in the light alone1 ,but in the darkness and the light4' ,i become more and more inclined to thank ,him as ,i see ,him more clearly4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 on his accepting the post of chaplain at the ,royal ,naval ,college1 ,osborne4 ,cambridge3 ,april #cj1 #aijc4 ,i am satisfied with your decision4 ,i thought over the matter1 but ,i could not see my way quite clearly to say anything more definite1 so ,i did not write again4 ,don't think that my silence was due to slackness4 ,i did what ,i thought was better than writing4 ,i spent an hour in praying over the matter4 ,now that the matter is settled ,i can tell you what a keen pleasure it is to me to have my dear old ---- near me in ,england1#a and doing a piece of work which is full of hope and joy4 ,i would not say this before1 because ,i did not wish to influence your decision by private considerations4 ,get some quiet time for prayer before ,september #a1 that when you go to ,osborne you may go en pleromati eulogias ,christou 7'filled full with the blessing of ,christ'74 ,i feel increasingly the need of such times to learn to walk by faith without stumbling1 and to accustom myself to the atmosphere of faith1 to see things as they appear to a man who has faith 'as a grain of mustard seed4' ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 en--epsilon1 nu2 pleromati--pi1 lambda1 eta1 rho1 omega1 mu1 alpha1 tau1 iota2 eulogias--epsilon1 upsilon1 lambda1 omicron1 gamma1 iota1 alpha1 final sigma2 ,christou--,chi1 rho1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 omicron1 upsilon ,westcott records a visit 7see ',life1' i4 #bdi7 to his old schoolmaster1 ,bishop ,prince ,lee4 ',people quote various words of the ,lord1 said the ,bishop1 as containing the sum of the ,gospel--the ,lord's ,prayer1 #ahf the ,sermon on the ,mount1 and the like2 to me the essence of the ,gospel is in simpler and shorter terms3 me phobou1 monon pisteue4#b ,ah6 ,westcott1 mark that monon1 and his eyes were filled with tears as he spoke4' ,ah6 ,s----1 mark that monon6 4 4 4 ,god bless you in your new work and make you a blessing to others as you have been to me4 #a ,he had been offered work in ,south ,africa4 #b ',be not afraid1 only believe4' ,transcriber's note3 ,the ,greek phrases in the above paragraph were transliterated as follows3 me--mu1 eta2 phobou--phi1 omicron1 beta1 omicron1 upsilon2 monon--mu1 omicron1 nu1 omicron1 nu2 pisteue--pi1 iota1 sigma1 tau1 epsilon1 upsilon1 epsilon ,to ,j4 ,k4 ,st4 ,thomas's ,home1 ,st4 ,thomas's ,hospital3 ,august #bh1 #aijc4 4 4 4 ,i am most grateful for your kind words1 though ,i know full well how little it is that ,i have done for you4 ,we clergymen so often seem to be working in the dark4 ,there are no clear results to show1 as e4g4 a doctor can comfort himself with1 when he has visibly cured a patient4 ,and ,i for one am too easily inclined to despair1 and to wonder whether the work is not in vain4 ,but 'trust is truer than our fears4' ,yet it does me good when ,i feel ,i have done anything1 however tiny1 for a man4 ,after all1 results are best left in ,god's hand4 ,he gives us enough to help us the next step onward1 but not enough to exalt us1 and to make us think we can do anything without ,his assistance4 ,work 'in the ,lord' cannot be in vain4 ,i am glad you have been reading ,bishop ,westcott's life4 ,he was a man of ,god1 and his life is an inspiration1 and a prophecy of what our life may--nay1 some day--will be4 4 4 4 ,i like that passage #ahg when he goes to see his old schoolmaster1 ,bishop ,prince ,lee1 who tells him with tears in his eyes that to his mind the whole ,gospel message is summed up in the words 'me phobou1 monon pisteue4' ,transcriber's note3 see the previous letter for transliteration notes on the above ,greek phrase4 ,to a friend who had been an international athlete4 ,st4 ,thomas's ,home3 ,september #e1 #aijc4 ,we had a fairly good ',long' in spite of the miserable weather4 ,congratulate me4 ,i won my first athletic distinction last ',long'--a ten-shilling prize4 ,i am thinking of chucking work and becoming a professional4 ,it was a second prize in a tennis tournament4 ,i had 7,i must own7 the best player in ,college as my partner4 ,i want to get a very conspicuous object as prize4 ,what do you suggest8 ,to ,c4 ,t4 ,w4 ,st4 ,thomas's ,hospital3 ,september #aijc4 ,i am getting on first-rate1 and ,i hope to be up early next week4 ,i believe you are right4 ,we should do well if we had more regularity and self-discipline in our life at ,cambridge1 and we should have more power over others4 ,pray for me4 4 4 4 ,you needn't pity me4 ,i am having a very good time4 ,it is jolly to do nothing1 and not even to have to dress and undress--both exhausting and monotonous occupations4 ,it has been a glorious day1 and although it is almost #g ,p4,m41 ,i am still out on the balcony enjoying the cool breezes4 #ahh ,to ,w4 ,o4 ,alassio2 ,december #aijc4 ,death has come near to my family lately4 ,i told you that my sister--the ,deaconess--had passed away from us4#a ,it is not all sorrow1 when we know that the life has been spent in walking with ,god1 when we know that this corruptible puts on incorruption1 and that what is sown in intense bodily weakness is raised in strength--eternal strength4 ,i am so glad that ,god has given to you ,his highest blessing4 ,i long to meet your future wife4 ,it makes me very happy to think of the happiness in store for you--to know that you are in the best of all schools4 ,i thank ,god4 ,love will bring you both nearer to the source of ,love4 4 4 4 ,this new blessing1 as you say1 is 'the gathering up of the best that ,god gives4' ,i can't express my thoughts as ,i would1 but ,i am very1 very glad4 4 4 4 ,illness teaches one many lessons4 ,i trust ,i have learned some4 ,i have been amazed at the goodness of my friends6 #a ,his sister1 ,deaconess ,cecilia1 'passed away' at the ,deanery1 ,westminster1 on ,september #h4 ,to ,w4 ,p41 an officer in the ,army4 ,hotel ,salisbury1 ,alassio1 ,italy3 ,december #ba1 #aijc4 ,i don't think things happen by chance4 ,indeed ,i am sure they do not4 ,i have never felt so humbled to the earth4 ,one sees one's life as a whole1 when one is helpless and can do nothing1 and the whole looks very poor and mean4 ,it is like the #ahi judgment-day--only with this grand exception1 that life is not yet over1 that the night has not yet come in which 'no man can work1' that you have still a chance to make the future better1 more honest1 more noble than the past4 ,then1 again1 ,i learnt the utter and wonderful kindness of my friends4 ,i felt so selfish and so surprised at the goodness they showed me4 ,again1 ,i saw something of the mystery of pain4 ,my own was so trivial compared with that which some others had to bear4 ,yet ,i had enough to startle me that such a fact should be permitted on earth at all4 ,i don't suppose we can understand its meaning2 but my consolation was that it is not necessarily a sign of ,god's displeasure--that the highest life was a life of suffering1 that the ,son of ,man was a ',man of ,sorrows4' ,everything seems to me to depend upon the way in which one takes the pain--if one voluntarily says1 ',thy kingdom come1 ,thy will be done1' then one is entering into the highest life1 and the pain becomes a new method of serving and knowing ,god4 ,but physical pain1 if prolonged1 is a terrible thing2 and there is no time on a bed of sickness for praying or thinking much of ,god unless one is accustomed to do so in health4 ,the needs of the poor body press in upon one4 ,death-bed repentances are realities1 but ,i am inclined to think that they are very rare4 ,it is terribly dangerous to defer being good until we are ill4 ,illness does not necessarily make us good4 ,i am afraid ,i was but a poor coward1 and yet my faith did not utterly fail4 ,god is the one hope for a man who is ill1 and ,he is true to ,his word4 ,he #aij hides ,his face behind the clouds2 but even when ,i couldn't see ,him at all1 ,i felt that ,he was there4 ,pray for me2 at present ,i feel too weak to pray much for myself4 ,i want--,i do want--to be a better man1 to help others nearer the kingdom4 ,i want1 when life is over1 to have a better record to look back upon than ,i had in hospital4 ,to ,f4 ,s4 ,h4 ,alassio1 ,italy2 ,january #b1 #aijd4 ,your letter came to me at a time when ,i was rather low4 ,i had to have a second operation4 ,however1 after fifteen weeks of ,nursing ,homes ,i escaped1 and1 as soon as ,i could1 made my way to ,st4 ,moritz4 ,for once the place didn't seem to suit me very well4 ,so1 after little more than a week1 ,i came down into ,italy4 ,i am so far recovered now that ,i quite hope to be able to go back to college at the beginning of this term4 ,illness and pain have taught me some lessons--at least ,i hope so4 ,i feel solemnised1 startled1 when ,i think of how life looked when ,i could do nothing for the time4 ,pray for me that ,i may be more real4 ,i learnt1 too1 how futile it is to put off repentance till sickness4 ,it is hard at such a time to think of aught save self and physical pain4 ,and my own pain was so trivial compared with that of others4 ,o ,god6 it is a terrible thing4 ,some day shall we be able to understand1 if not with the head1 with the heart1 part of its meaning8 ,meanwhile the individual can say1 however feebly1 ',thy kingdom come1 ,thy will be done4' #aia ,to his brother1 a doctor in ,south ,africa4 ,alassio1 ,italy3 ,january #g1 #aijd4 ,at last ,i am beginning to get tired of doing nothing4 ,i hope that eventually ,i shall be stronger than ,i have been for some years past4 ,at any rate ,i hope a little first-hand experience of pain will make me more sympathetic4 ,pain seems to me now a greater mystery than ever before4 ,but ,i comforted myself with the thought that in the highest ,life ever seen on earth1 there was a full measure of spiritual1 mental1 and physical pain4 ,also it was a comfort to feel that when one accepted1 not simply with resignation but with faith1 certain suffering1 one was in sympathy with the will of the universe1 'working together with ,god' in some mysterious way4 ,what a strange place a hospital is6 ,how wonderful the ,gospels are1 with their hope and comfort on every page--hope for the physical as well as the mental side of man's life6 ,i like more than ever now to read how ,jesus went about healing all manner of diseases and all manner of sickness and bringing life and strength wherever ,he came1 showing us that ,heaven is on our side in our wrestle with all that deforms and degrades human nature4 ,i certainly don't regret my illness4 ,besides showing me the marvellous kindness of friends1 it has1 ,i hope1 taught me much4 #aic ,,appendix ,the following letter addressed to the ,editor of this volume was received from the ,rev4 ,h4 ,bisseker1 chaplain at the ,leys ,school1 ,cambridge1 too late for insertion in an earlier portion of the book3 ',your brother's friendship1 as you must have heard so often during the past few months1 was valued in ,cambridge beyond that of most men1 and ,i am probably only one of many who still look to that friendship as among the prominent facts of their time up here4 ,though personally ,i did not learn to know ,mr4 ,robinson when ,i first came up1 his brotherliness so deeply impressed me during the four years for which our friendship lasted1 that ,i still find it difficult to believe that he is no longer to be found in the familiar rooms at ,christ's1 and has ceased to be a part of our ,cambridge life4 ,and yet1 in another sense1 he has not ceased to be a part of that life2 for one feels that during his residence up here he managed1 if one may so express it1 to put a bit of himself into more than one man1 and that in this way he will continue to live among us long after he himself has been removed4 #aid ',i have often thought about him and his quiet1 strong influence since we heard that we had lost him1 and almost invariably the same three of his characteristics assume the uppermost place in my thought4 ,different sides of his nature would appeal to different men3 ,i can best serve your purpose by mentioning those which made the deepest impression on my own mind4 ',one of the chief causes of your brother's influence was unquestionably his sense of the value of the individual4 ,he used to take men one by one and make a separate study of each4 ,the consequence was that he knew his men4 ,on any given visit the acquaintance did not1 as it were1 have to be begun over again4 ,on the contrary1 the acquaintance once formed1 some common ground already existed2 for so great was your brother's power of sympathy that1 where at the first no such common ground appeared to exist1 he soon learnt to find a standing-place himself on that assumed by the man he was seeking to know4 ,and not only did ,mr4 ,robinson possess this power of valuing the individual1 but he also was able to inspire the objects of his influence with the knowledge of his particular interest in them4 ,thus they soon dropped the idea of acquaintanceship1 and began to think of him as friend1 and there you have in a word the secret of his wide influence4 ,he was interested in men1 but what he loved was a man4 ',mr4 ,robinson was no less marked off from the majority of men by the stress which he laid upon the reality and power of prayer4 ,we used from time to time to have long talks together on this subject1 so #aie that ,i can speak with some little knowledge of the place which he assigned it in his life4 ,with characteristic modesty he not infrequently distrusted himself in his active contact with men4 ,his very anxiety to help others towards the ideals by which his own life was dominated led him to see the risk of placing hindrances in their way by an injudicious intrusion into the secret places of their hearts4 ,drawn in different directions1 therefore1 by his passionate desire to win men for ,christ and his cautious fear lest untimely words of his should hinder rather than help1 he found refuge in giving himself up to earnest prayer on their behalf4 ,and prayer to him meant more than a light repetition of words4 ,he used often1 ,i believe1 to spend as long as half an hour at a time in seeking blessing for a single man4 ,we cannot doubt that1 in the strong influence which he himself exerted upon so many of those who knew him1 such persistent prayer received at least a part of its own answer4 ',the last element in your brother's individuality which always impressed me was his restrained1 but genuine1 mysticism4 ,in the few accounts of his life that ,i have read ,i do not remember any allusion to this characteristic4 ,that he possessed it1 however1 and this to no usual degree1 seems to my mind quite patent2 in fact1 it was this suggestion of mysticism that first attracted me to him4 ,the mysticism one sees around one is often so unregulated and so ignorant that it was refreshing to find a mystic who was also an enlightened scholar and thinker4 ,it confirmed the feeling1 instinctive in one's heart1 that1 despite the abuse of caricature1 a deep1 intelligent #aif apprehension of unseen realities is of the essence of the fulness of religion4 ,mr4 ,forbes ,robinson appeared to possess an unusually certain cognisance of the unseen world4 ,how well ,i remember the way in which1 again and again1 tea over and our pipes lighted1 he would curl himself up in one of his or my own big chairs and discuss questions of interest to us both with a far-away look in his eyes altogether suggestive of a genuine otherworldliness6 ,and this familiarity with unseen verities seemed to run through all those parts of his life with which ,i was acquainted1 and indeed to be to him the most real fact of all existence4 ,to use the simple language of olden days1 ,i believe that he walked with ,god3 and that explains his life4 ',these1 then1 were the three characteristics of your brother which more than any others have impressed themselves upon my mind4 ,i do not think that they were three separate sides of his personality3 ,i should say1 rather1 that they were three different expressions of one fundamental attribute4 ,it was because he walked so closely with ,god that he so loved the individual sons of ,god4 ,it was because he so loved the ,great ,father and each child of ,his that he had so strong a faith in the power of prayer and such unwearying patience to persist in it4 ',a life like your brother's1 if ,i may say one thing more1 forms1 ,i sometimes think1 one of the strongest pledges of human immortality4 ,in one sense1 it is true1 he seems to have done so much2 and yet1 in another sense1 those of us who knew the faculties which he had cultivated1 his knowledge and patient #aig scholarship1 his sympathy and insight1 his tact and passion for men1 and1 most precious of all1 his power with ,god1 were looking for even greater things in years to come4 ,such fitness for influence as he possessed is not acquired in a day1 and just when its worth was being proved he was taken from us4 ,surely these gifts and graces are not now as if they had never been1 or as if1 once granted1 they had been idly wasted6 ,can that earnest1 patient cultivation really have been gratuitous1 and the unselfish instinct that inspired it mistaken8 ,were it so1 the whole universe looks out of joint4 ,the more ,i consider such lives as that of your brother--lives1 ,i mean1 which1 bearing promise of so rich a harvest1 are yet cut off before the full harvest can possibly have been realised--the more my conviction grows that the passing of such men as he is not death1 but only the birth which we call death4' #aii ,,index ,anthropomorphism in the ,o4,t41 #ace ,average man1 the1 #dc ,beauty1 natural1 #aec1 #aef sq4 ,beauty1 origin of personal1 #gh-ha ,boers1 religion of the1 #aaj sq4 ,boer war1 the1 #afb sq4 ,christmas1 meaning of1 #aec ,christ's ,college ,magazine1 extract from1 #aj ,clough1 quotation from1 #afd ,communion of saints1 #fi ,continuity of work1 #ajf sq4 ,cornwall1 open-air preaching in1 #be ,criticism of ,o4,t41 #ed1 #acf sq4 ,daily service1 repetition of1 #ei ,eternity1 life in the light of1 #afd ,faith1 function of1 #abj ,fitzpatrick1 ,rev4 ,t4 ,c41 sketch by1 #cf-db ,friendship1 permanent character of1 #hd ,friendship1 the1 of ,christ1 #hi sq4 ,future life1 the1 #fi1 #aag sq41 #abe1 #adi1 #aej sq4 ,gordon1 ,general1 in ,s4 ,africa1 #aaf sq4 ,hebrew and ,greek ideals1 #aff sq41 #ahc ,holy ,spirit1 work of the1 #ahb1 #ahd ,home life1 significance of1 #fj1 #gg sq41 #hd1 #aaj1 #aah1 #aei ,humour1 sense of1 #dg sq4 ,incarnation1 results of his belief in1 #de ,influence upon others1 #ge ,james1 ,dr41 sketch by1 #g sqq4 ,kant1 philosophy of1 #agf1 #agh ,kittermaster1 ,rev4 ,d4 ,b41 sketch by1 #db-ec ,kruger1 interview with1 #aab ,law as revealed to the ,jews1 #fc sqq4 ,letter-writer1 ,st4 ,paul a1 #hb ,letters-- ,h4 ,j4 ,b41 #aea1 #afd1 #aff1 #ahb ,w4 ,a4 ,b41 #fj1 #gd1 #gg1 #hf1 #aac ,f4 ,j4 ,c41 #abi1 #aca1 #acd1 #aec1 #agi ,g4 ,j4 ,c41 #abb1 #abc1 #aeh ,j4 ,l4 ,d41 #ia1 #ic1 #ie1 #aji ,g4 ,f41 #ajd ,a4 ,w4 ,g41 #fi ,f4 ,s4 ,h41 #ajb1 #ajc1 #aje1 #ajf1 #aai1 #acb1 #acf1 #aci1 #ahe1 #ahg1 #aij ,j4 ,c4 ,h41 #aag ,w4 ,d4 ,h41 #abg1 #afb ,d4 ,b4 ,k41 #adh1 #aei1 #agb1 #agd ,j4 ,k41 #ajh1 #ahf ,e4 ,n4 ,l41 #eh1 #fh ,t4 ,h4 ,m41 #ee1 #ef1 #eg1 #gf1 #ajj ,w4 ,o41 #adc1 #ahh ,h4 ,p41 #ade1 #aga ,w4 ,p41 #ahh ,a4 ,v4 ,r41 #ed ,d4 ,d4 ,r41 #fc1 #hh1 #ih ,c4 ,n4 ,w41 #abj ,c4 ,t4 ,w41 #ajg1 #aaa1 #abf1 #abg1 #ahg ,anonymous1 #aad1 #abe1 #adf1 #adi1 #afb ,to a friend at ,cambridge1 #aed1 #afg ,to his brother ,edward in ,s4 ,africa1 #acg1 #aef1 #aga1 #agh ,to his brother1 a doctor in ,s4 ,africa1 #abh1 #ace1 #aia ,to his mother1 #aaf1 #aha ,to the mother of his godchild1 ,m4 ,f41 #aaj1 #aah1 #afe ,life1 zoe as used in ,st4 ,john1 #ee ,life1 the ,divine1 manifested1 #aja sq4 ,love1 his1 for his friends1 #de sq41 #ej1 #aed1 #ahb ,love1 meaning and scope of1 #gc1 #gf1 #aac sq41 #abd1 #adb ,love1 the action of the ,divine1 #adb ,motto1 family1 #a4 ,national life1 significance of1 #ff ,natural beauty1 eternal1 #aje ,naval officers1 life of1 #aci sq4 ,ordination1 letters to candidates for1 #eh1 #abg sq41 #adf1 #afb ,pain1 mystery of1 #ahi1 #aia ,parties in the ,church1 #aji ,person1 ,god revealed as a1 #ga sq41 #ge ,prayer1 his habit of intercessory1 #bi1 #dj1 #ea1 #abc1 #ach1 #aea1 #aed1 #afg sq41 #agc1 #ahe ,prayer1 need of1 #ie1 #ig1 #abi-acb1 #afj sq41 #afb1 #agg ,providence revealed in life of individuals1 #aba ,sacraments1 the1 their significance1 #gf sq41 #hj ,saints1 called to be1 #if1 #adi sq4 ,schoolmaster1 the work of a1 #hf sq41 #ade sq41 #aeh ,selfishness1 tendency of1 #ib sq4 ,self-sacrifice1 #aff1 #agj ,self-sacrifice of ,god1 #age ,simplicity of the ,divine nature1 #eg ,suffering1 a proof of the ,divine love1 #afe sq41 #ahj ,sunday evening 'at homes1' #ci sq4 ,sympathy1 meaning and need of1 #ia sq41 #ajf1 #adj1 #aga1 #age-g ,sympathy1 silent1 #bc sq4 ,tancock1 ,dr41 impressions of ,f4 ,r41 #c sq4 ,temptations of ,christ1 #add ,thackeray's novels1 #ajc sq4 ,think1 attempts to teach men to1 #ab ,toft1 work at1 #be sq4 ,toleration1 #bf sq4 ,trinity1 significance of doctrine of1 #ga1 #ge ,unity of all men in ,god1 #gj ,walk from ,london to ,cambridge1 #ai sq4 ,worship1 public1 #abb