,a ,,narrative ,,of ,,some ,,of ,,the   
,,lord',s ,,dealings ,,with ,,george    
,m,ue,l,l,e,r  ,,written ,,by ,,himself 
,,first ,,part  ,,ninth ,,edition  ,j4  
,,nisbet  ,,co41 ,,berners ,,street1    
,,london4  ,,to ,,be ,,also ,,had ,,in  
,,bristol1  ,,at ,,the ,,bible ,,and    
,,tract ,,warehouse ,,of ,,the          
,,scriptural ,,knowledge ,,institution  
,,for ,,home ,,and ,,abroad1 ,no4 #gh   
,,park ,,street1 ,,and ,,through ,,all  
,,booksellers4  #ahfe   ,entered at     
,stationers' ,hall4  ,,london3 ,,dryden 
,,press3 ,j4 ,,davy ,,and ,,sons1 #acg1 
,,long ,,acre4   ,,preface  ,,to ,,the  
,,first ,,edition ,,of ,,the ,,first    
,,part4  ,it was only after the         
consideration of many months1 and after 
much self-examination as to my motives1 
and after much earnest prayer1 that ,i  
came to the conclusion to write this    
little work4 ,i have not taken one      
single step in the ,lord's service1     
concerning which ,i have prayed so much4
 ,my great dislike to increasing the    

number of religious books would1 in     
itself1 have been sufficient to have    
kept me for ever from it1 had ,i not    
cherished the hope of being instrumental
 in this way to lead some of my brethren
 to value the ,holy ,scriptures more1   
and to judge by the standard of the word
 of ,god the principles on which they   
act4 ,but that which weighed more with  
me than any thing was1 that ,i have     
reason to believe from what ,i have seen
 among the children of ,god1 that many  
of their trials arise1 either from want 
of confidence in the ,lord as it regards
 temporal things1 or from carrying on   
their business in an unscriptural way4  
,on account1 therefore1 of the          
remarkable way in which the ,lord has   
dealt with me in temporal things1 within
 the last ten years1 ,i feel that ,i am 
a debtor to the ,church of ,christ1 and 
that ,i ought1 for the benefit of my    
poorer brethren especially1 to make     
known1 as much as ,i can1 the way in    
which ,i have been led4 ,in addition to 

this1 ,i know it to be a fact1 that to  
many souls the ,lord has blessed what ,i
 have told them about the way in which  
,he has led me1 and therefore it seemed 
to me a duty to use such means1 whereby 
others also1 with whom ,i could not     
possibly converse1 might be benefited4  
,that which at last1 on ,may #f1 #ahcf1 
induced me finally to determine to write
 this ,narrative was1 that1 if the ,lord
 should permit the book to sell1 ,i     
might1 by the profits arising from the  
sale1 be enabled in a greater degree to 
help the poor brethren and sisters among
 whom ,i labour1 a matter which just at 
that time weighed much on my mind4 ,i   
therefore at last began to write4 ,but  
after three days ,i was obliged to lay  
the work again aside1 on account of my  
other pressing engagements4 ,on ,may    
#aeth ,i was laid aside on account of an
 abscess and now being unable1 for many 
weeks1 to walk about as usual1 though   
able to work at home1 ,i had time for   
writing4 ,when the manuscript was nearly

 completed1 ,i gave it to a brother to  
look it over1 that ,i might have his    
judgment2 and the ,lord so refreshed his
 spirit through it1 that he offered to  
advance the means for having it printed1
 with the understanding that if the book
 should not sell1 he would never        
consider me his debtor4 ,by this offer  
not a small obstacle was removed1 as ,i 
have no means of my own to defray the   
expense of printing4 ,these two last    
circumstances1 connected with many other
 points1 confirmed me that ,i had not   
been mistaken1 when ,i came to the      
conclusion that it was the will of ,god1
 that ,i should serve ,his church in    
this way4  ,the fact of my being a      
foreigner1 and therefore but very       
imperfectly acquainted with the ,english
 language1 ,i judged to be no sufficient
 reason for keeping me from writing4    
,the ,christian reader being acquainted 
with this fact1 will candidly excuse any
 inaccuracy of expression4  ,for the    
poor among the brethren this ,narrative 

is especially intended1 and to their    
prayers ,i commend it in particular4    
,,george ,m,ue,l,l,e,r4  ,bristol1 ,july
 #e1 #ahcg4    ,,extract ,,from ,,the   
,,preface ,,to ,,the ,,second ,,edition 
,,of ,,the ,,first ,,part  ,as to this  
second edition ,i would mention1 that1  
while in substance it is the same as the
 first1 yet1 on account of my increased 
acquaintance with the ,english language1
 many verbal alterations have been made2
 also several alterations have been made
 on account of the increased light which
 the ,lord has been pleased to grant me 
since ,july1 #aicg2 a few paragraphs    
have been entirely left out1 and a few  
new paragraphs have been added4         
,,george ,m,ue,l,l,e,r4  ,bristol1      
,october #bh1 #ahdj4    ,,extract ,,from
 ,,the ,,preface ,,to ,,the ,,third     
,,edition ,,of ,,the ,,first ,,part  ,as
 the second edition of four thousand    
copies is exhausted1 and as the ,lord   
condescends to bless this ,narrative    
more and more1 both to believers and    

unbelievers1 it has appeared to me a    
debt which ,i owe to the church of ,god 
to publish this third edition4 ,several 
new paragraphs of considerable length   
have been introduced4  ,,george         
,m,ue,l,l,e,r4  ,bristol1 ,june #ag1    
#ahde4    ,,preface ,,to ,,the ,,eighth 
,,edition ,,of ,,the ,,first ,,part     
,the ,seventh edition of eight thousand 
copies is also exhausted1 and the ,lord 
condescends to bless yet more and more  
this ,narrative1 both to the the        
conversion of unbelievers1 and to the   
edification of ,his own children4 ,on   
this account ,i feel it my duty1 as well
 as my privilege1 to send forth this new
 edition1 in which scarcely any         
alterations have been made4  ,,george   
,m,ue,l,l,e,r4  ,bristol1 ,december1    
#ahha4    ,,preface ,,to ,,the ,,ninth  
,,edition  ,the reason which led me to  
the publication of the ,eighth edition  
of this ,narrative1 has influenced me   
also to publish this ,ninth edition4    
,,george ,m,ue,l,l,e,r4  ,bristol1      

,march1 #ahie4    ,a  ,,narrative1  c4  
c4  ,i was born at ,kroppenstaedt1 near 
,halberstadt1 in the kingdom of         
,prussia1 on ,september #bgth1 #ahje4   
,in ,january #ahaj my parents removed to
 ,heimersleben1 about four miles from   
,kroppenstaedt1 where my father was     
appointed collector in the excise4 ,as a
 warning to parents ,i mention1 that my 
father preferred me to my brother1 which
 was very injurious to both of us4 ,to  
me1 as tending to produce in my mind a  
feeling of self-elevation2 and to my    
brother1 by creating in him a dislike   
both towards my father and me4  ,my     
father1 who educated his children on    
worldly principles1 gave us much money1 
considering our age2 not in order that  
we might spend it1 but1 as he said1 to  
accustom us to possess money without    
spending it4 ,the result was1 that it   
led me and my brother into many sins4   
,for ,i repeatedly spent a part of the  
money in a childish way1 and afterwards1
 when my father looked over my little   

treasure1 ,i sought to deceive him in   
making up the accounts1 either by not   
putting down all the money which he had 
given me1 or by professing to have more 
money in hand than was the case1 and    
counting it out accordingly before him4 
,now1 though this deceit was found out  
at last1 and ,i was punished1 yet ,i    
remained the same4 ,for before ,i was   
ten years old ,i repeatedly took of the 
government money which was intrusted to 
my father1 and which he had to make up2 
till one day1 as he had repeatedly      
missed money1 he detected my theft1 by  
depositing a counted sum in the room    
where ,i was1 and leaving me to myself  
for a while4 ,being thus left alone1 ,i 
took some of the money1 and hid it under
 my foot in my shoe4 ,when my father1   
after his return1 had counted and missed
 the money1 ,i was searched and my theft
 detected4  ,though ,i was punished on  
this and other occasions1 yet ,i do not 
remember that at any time1 when my sins 
were found out1 it made any other       

impression upon me than to make me think
 how ,i might do the thing the next time
 more cleverly1 so as not to be         
detected4 ,hence it came1 that this was 
not the last time that ,i was guilty of 
stealing4  ,when ,i was between ten and 
eleven years of age1 ,i was sent to     
,halberstadt1 to the cathedral classical
 school1 there to be prepared for the   
university2 for my father's desire was1 
that ,i should become a clergyman3 not1 
indeed1 that thus ,i might serve ,god1  
but that ,i might have a comfortable    
living4 ,my time was now spent in       
studying1 reading novels1 and indulging1
 though so young1 in sinful practices4  
,thus it continued till ,i was fourteen 
years old1 when my mother was suddenly  
removed4 ,the night she was dying1 ,i1  
not knowing of her illness1 was playing 
at cards till two in the morning1 and on
 the next day1 being the ,lord's day1 ,i
 went with some of my companions in sin 
to a tavern1 and then we went about the 
streets1 half intoxicated4  ,the        

following day ,i attended1 for the first
 time1 the religious instruction1 which 
,i was to receive previous to my        
confirmation4 ,this likewise was        
attended to in a careless manner2 and   
when ,i returned to my lodgings1 my     
father had arrived to fetch my brother  
and me home to our mother's funeral4    
,this bereavement made no lasting       
impression on my mind4 ,i grew worse and
 worse4 ,three or four days before ,i   
was confirmed1 7and thus admitted to    
partake of the ,lord's supper17 ,i was  
guilty of gross immorality2 and the very
 day before my confirmation1 when ,i was
 in the vestry with the clergyman to    
confess my sins1 7according to the usual
 practice17 after a formal manner1 ,i   
defrauded him2 for ,i handed over to him
 only the twelfth part of the fee which 
my father had given me for him4  ,in    
this state of heart1 without prayer1    
without true repentance1 without faith1 
without knowledge of the plan of        
salvation1 ,i was confirmed1 and took   

the ,lord's supper1 on the ,sunday after
 ,easter #ahbj4 ,yet ,i was not without 
some feeling about the solemnity of the 
thing1 and ,i stayed at home in the     
afternoon and evening1 whilst the other 
boys and girls1 who had been confirmed  
with me1 walked about in the fields ,i  
also made resolutions to turn from those
 vices in which ,i was living1 and to   
study more4 ,but as ,i had no regard to 
,god1 and attempted the thing in my own 
strength1 all soon came to nothing1 and 
,i still grew worse4  ,six weeks after  
my confirmation ,i went for a fortnight 
to ,brunswick1 to a sister of my father1
 where ,i became attached to a young    
female1 who was a ,roman catholic4 ,my  
time till ,midsummer #ahba was spent    
partly in study1 but in a great degree  
in playing the piano-forte and guitar1  
reading novels1 frequenting taverns1    
forming resolutions to become different1
 yet breaking them almost as fast as    
they were made4 ,my money was often     
spent on my sinful pleasures1 through   

which ,i was now and then brought into  
trouble1 so that once1 to satisfy my    
hunger1 ,i stole a piece of coarse      
bread1 the allowance of a soldier who   
was quartered in the house where ,i     
lodged4 ,what a bitter1 bitter thing is 
the service of ,satan1 even in this     
world66  ,at ,midsummer #ahba my father 
obtained an appointment at ,schoenebeck1
 near ,magdeburg1 and ,i embraced the   
opportunity of entreating him to remove 
me to the cathedral classical school of 
,magdeburg2 for ,i thought1 that1 if ,i 
could but leave my companions in sin1   
and get out1 of certain snares1 and be  
placed under other tutors1 ,i should    
then live a different life4 ,but as my  
dependence in this matter also was not  
upon ,god1 ,i fell into a still worse   
state4 ,my father consented1 and ,i was 
allowed to leave ,halberstadt1 and to   
stay at ,heimersleben till ,michaelmas4 
,during that time ,i superintended1     
according to my father's wish1 certain  
alterations1 which were to be made in   

his house there1 for the sake of letting
 it profitably4 ,being thus quite my own
 master1 ,i grew still more idle1 and   
lived as much as before in all sorts of 
sin4  ,when ,michaelmas came1 ,i        
persuaded my father to leave me at      
,heimersleben till ,easter1 and to let  
me read the classics with a clergyman   
living in the same place4 ,as ,dr4      
,nagel was a very learned man1 and also 
in the habit of having pupils under his 
care1 and a friend of my father1 my     
request was granted4 ,i was now living  
on the premises belonging to my father1 
under little real control1 and intrusted
 with a considerable sum of money1 which
 ,i had to collect for my father1 from  
persons who owed it to him4 ,my habits  
soon led me to spend a considerable part
 of this money1 giving receipts for     
different sums1 yet leaving my father to
 suppose ,i had not received them4  ,in 
,november ,i went on a pleasure         
excursion to ,magdeburg1 where ,i spent 
six days in much sin2 and though my     

absence from home had been found out by 
my father1 before ,i returned from      
thence2 yet ,i took all the money ,i    
could obtain1 and went to ,brunswick1   
after ,i had1 through a number of lies1 
obtained permission from my tutor4 ,the 
reason of my going to ,brunswick was1   
the attachment ,i had formed eighteen   
months previously to the young female   
residing there4 ,i spent a week at      
,brunswick1 in an expensive hotel4 ,at  
the end of the week my money was        
expended4 ,this1 as well as the want of 
a passport1 prevented my staying any    
longer in the hotel2 but as ,i still    
wished to remain at ,brunswick1 ,i went 
to my uncle1 the husband of my father's 
sister1 and made some excuse for not    
having gone to him in the first         
instance4 ,my uncle1 seeing ,i suppose  
my unsteady life1 intimated after a     
week1 that he did not wish me to remain 
with him any longer4  ,i then went1     
without money1 to another hotel1 in a   
village near ,brunswick1 where ,i spent 

another week in an expensive way of     
living4 ,at last1 the owner of the hotel
 suspecting that ,i had no money1 asked 
for payment1 and ,i was obliged to leave
 my best clothes as a security1 and     
could scarcely thus escape from being   
arrested4 ,i then walked about six      
miles1 to ,wolfenbuttel1 went to an inn1
 and began again to live as if ,i had   
plenty of money4 ,here ,i stayed two    
days1 looking out for an opportunity to 
run away2 for ,i had now nothing        
remaining to leave as a pledge4 ,but the
 window of my room was too high to allow
 of my escaping1 by getting down at     
night4 ,on the second or third morning  
,i went quietly out of the yard1 and    
then ran off2 but being suspected and   
observed1 and therefore seen to go off1 
,i was immediately called after1 and so 
had to return4  ,i now confessed my     
case1 but found no mercy4 ,i was        
arrested1 and taken between two soldiers
 to a police officer4 ,being suspected  
by him to be a vagabond or thief1 ,i was

 examined for about three hours1 and    
then sent to gaol4 ,i now found myself  
at the age of sixteen1 an inmate of the 
same dwelling with thieves and          
murderers1 and treated accordingly4 ,my 
superior manners profited nothing4 ,for 
though1 as a particular favour1 ,i      
received the first evening some meat    
with my bread1 ,i had the next day the  
common allowance of the prisoners1--very
 coarse bread and water1 and for dinner 
vegetables1 but no meat4 ,my situation  
was most wretched4 ,i was locked up in  
this place day and night1 without       
permission to leave my cell4 ,the dinner
 was such that on the first day ,i      
completely loathed it2 and left it      
untouched4 ,the second day ,i took a    
little1 the third day all1 and the      
fourth and following days ,i would fain 
have had more4 ,on the second day ,i    
asked the keeper for a ,bible1 not to   
consider its blessed contents1 but to   
pass away the time4 ,however1 ,i        
received none4 ,here then ,i was2 no    

creature with me2 no book1 no work in my
 hands1 and large iron rails before my  
narrow window4  ,during the second night
 ,i was awakened out of my sleep by the 
rattling of the bolts and keys4 ,three  
men came into my room4 ,when ,i asked   
them in my fright what it meant1 they   
laughed at me1 continuing quietly to try
 the iron rails1 to see whether ,i could
 escape4--,after a few days ,i found    
out1 that a thief was imprisoned next to
 me1 and1 as far as a thick wooden      
partition would allow of it1 ,i         
conversed with him2 and shortly after   
the governor of the prison allowed him1 
as a favour to me1 to share my cell4 ,we
 now passed away our time in relating   
our adventures1 and ,i was by this time 
so wicked1 that ,i was not satisfied    
with relating things of which ,i had    
been really guilty1 but ,i even invented
 stories1 to show him what a famous     
fellow ,i was4  ,i waited in vain day   
after day to be liberated4--,after about
 ten or twelve days my fellow prisoner  

and ,i disagreed1 and thus we two       
wretched beings1 to increase our        
wretchedness1 spent day after day       
without conversing together4--,i was in 
prison from ,december #ahth1 #ahba1 till
 ,january #abth1 #ahbb1 when the keeper 
came and told me to go with him to the  
police office4 ,here ,i found1 that the 
,commissioner1 before whom ,i had been  
tried1 had first written to my uncle at 
,brunswick1 and when he had written in  
reply1 that it was better to acquaint my
 father with my conduct1 the            
,commissioner had done so2 and thus ,i  
was kept in prison till my father sent  
the money which was needed for my       
traveling expenses1 to pay my debt in   
the inn1 and for my maintenance in the  
prison4 ,so ungrateful was ,i now1 for  
certain little kindnesses shown to me by
 my fellow-prisoner1 that1 although ,i  
had promised to call on his sister1 to  
deliver a message from him1 ,i omitted  
to do so2 and so little had ,i been     
benefited by this my chastisement1 that1

 though ,i was going home to meet an    
angry father1 only two hours after ,i   
had left the town where ,i had been     
imprisoned1 ,i chose an avowedly wicked 
person as my traveling companion for a  
great part of my journey4  ,my father1  
who arrived two days after ,i had       
reached ,heimersleben1 after having     
severely beaten me1 took me home to     
,schoenebeck1 intending to keep me there
 till ,easter1 and then to send me to a 
classical school at ,halle1 that ,i     
might be under strict discipline and the
 continual inspection of a tutor4 ,in   
the meantime ,i took pupils1 whom ,i    
instructed in ,latin1 ,french1          
arithmetic1 and ,german ,grammar4 ,i now
 endeavoured1 by diligence in study1 to 
regain the favour of my father4 ,my     
habits were1 as to outward appearance1  
exemplary4 ,i made progress in my own   
studies1 benefited my pupils1 and was   
soon liked by every body around me1 and 
in a short time my father had forgotten 
all4 ,but all this time ,i was in heart 

as bad as ever2 for ,i was still in     
secret habitually guilty of great sins4 
,easter came1 and on account of my good 
behaviour1 my diligence in study1 and   
also because ,i was no expense to my    
father1 but earned much more than ,i    
cost him1 ,i easily persuaded him to let
 me stay at home till ,michaelmas4 ,but 
after that period he would not consent  
to my remaining any longer with him1 and
 therefore ,i left home1 pretending to  
go to ,halle to be examined4 ,but having
 a hearty dislike to the strict         
discipline of which ,i had heard1 and   
knowing also that ,i should meet there  
young men attending the university with 
whom ,i was acquainted1 enjoying all the
 liberty of ,german students1 whilst ,i 
myself was still at school3 for these   
and other reasons ,i went to            
,nordhausen1 and had myself examined by 
the director of the gymnasium1 to be    
received into that school4 ,i then went 
home1 but never told my father a word of
 all this deception1 till the day before

 my departure1 which obliged me to      
invent a whole chain of lies4 ,he was   
then very angry2 but at last1 through my
 entreaties and persuasion1 he gave way 
and allowed me to go4 ,this was in the  
beginning of ,october1 #ahbb4  ,i       
continued at ,nordhausen two years and  
six months1 till ,easter1 #ahbe4 ,during
 this time ,i studied with considerable 
diligence the ,latin classics1 ,french1 
history1 my own language1 c42 but did   
little in ,hebrew1 ,greek1 and the      
,mathematics4 ,i lived in the house of  
the director1 and got1 through my       
conduct1 highly into his favour1 so much
 so1 that ,i was held up by him in the  
first class as an example to the rest1  
and he used to take me regularly with   
him in his walks1 to converse with me in
 ,latin4 ,i used now to rise regularly  
at four1 winter and summer1 and         
generally studied all the day1 with     
little exception1 till ten at night4    
,but whilst ,i was thus outwardly       
gaining the esteem of my                

fellow-creatures1 ,i did not care in the
 least about ,god1 but lived secretly in
 much sin1 in consequence of which ,i   
was taken ill1 and for thirteen weeks   
confined to my room4 ,during my illness 
,i had no real sorrow of heart1 yet     
being under certain natural impressions 
of religion1 ,i read through            
,klopstock's works without weariness4 ,i
 cared nothing about the word of ,god4  
,i had about three hundred books of my  
own1 but no ,bible4 ,i practically set a
 far higher value upon the writings of  
,horace and ,cicero1 ,voltaire and      
,moliere1 than upon the volume of       
inspiration4 ,now and then ,i felt that 
,i ought to become a different person1  
and ,i tried to amend my conduct1       
particularly when ,i went to the ,lord's
 supper1 as ,i used to do twice every   
year1 with the other young men4 ,the day
 previous to attending that ordinance1  
,i used to refrain from certain things2 
and on the day itself ,i was serious1   
and also swore once or twice to ,god1   

with the emblem of the broken body in my
 mouth1 to become better1 thinking that 
for the oath's sake ,i should be induced
 to reform4 ,but after one or two days  
were over1 all was forgotten1 and ,i was
 as bad as before4  ,i had now grown so 
wicked1 that ,i could habitually tell   
lies without blushing4 ,and further1 to 
show how fearfully wicked ,i was1 ,i    
will mention1 out of many others1 only  
one great sin1 of which ,i was guilty1  
before ,i left this place4 ,through my  
dissipated life ,i had contracted debts1
 which ,i had no means of discharging2  
for my father could allow me only about 
as much as ,i needed for my regular     
maintenance4 ,one day1 after having     
received a sum of money from him1 and   
having purposely shown it to some of my 
companions1 ,i afterwards feigned that  
it was stolen1 having myself by force   
injured the lock of my trunk1 and having
 also designedly forced open my guitar  
case4 ,i also feigned myself greatly    
frightened at what had happened1 ran    

into the director's room with my coat   
off1 and told him that my money was     
stolen4 ,i was greatly pitied4 ,some    
friends also gave me now as much money  
as ,i pretended to have lost1 and the   
circumstance afforded me a ground upon  
which to ask my creditors to wait       
longer4 ,but this matter turned out     
bitterly2 for the director1 having      
ground to suspect me1 though he could   
not prove anything1 never fully restored
 me to his confidence4  ,as it regards  
my own feeling1 though ,i was very      
wicked1 yet this desperate act of       
depravity was too much1 even for my     
hardened conscience2 for it never       
afterwards allowed me to feel easy in   
the presence of the director's wife1    
who1 like a kind mother1 had waited on  
me in my illness1 and on whom ,i had now
 so willfully brought trouble4 ,how     
long-suffering was ,god at this time1   
not to destroy me at once6 ,and how     
merciful that he did not suffer me to be
 tried before the police1 who easily    

would have detected that the whole was a
 fabrication6 ,i was heartily glad for  
many reasons1 but particularly on       
account of this latter circumstance1 to 
be able soon after to exchange the      
school for the university4  ,i had now  
obtained what ,i had fondly looked      
forward to4 ,i became a member of the   
university1 and that with very          
honourable testimonials4 ,i had thus    
obtained permission to preach in the    
,lutheran ,establishment1 but ,i was as 
truly unhappy1 and as far from ,god as  
ever4 ,i had made strong resolutions1   
now at last1 to change my course of     
life1 for two reasons3 first1 because1  
without it1 ,i thought no parish would  
choose me as their pastor2 and secondly1
 that without a considerable knowledge  
of divinity ,i should never get a good  
living1 as the obtaining of a valuable  
cure1 in ,prussia1 generally depends    
upon the degree which the candidates of 
the ministry obtain in passing the      
examination4 ,but the moment ,i entered 

,halle1 the university town1 all my     
resolutions came to nothing4--,being now
 more than ever my own master1 and      
without any control as long as ,i did   
not fight a duel1 molest the people in  
the streets1 c41 ,i renewed my          
profligate life afresh1 though now a    
student of divinity4 ,when my money was 
spent1 ,i pawned my watch and a part of 
my linen and clothes1 or borrowed in    
other ways4 ,yet in the midst of it all 
,i had a desire to renounce this        
wretched life1 for ,i had no enjoyment  
in it1 and had sense enough left to see1
 that the end one day or other would be 
miserable2 for ,i should never get a    
living4 ,but ,i had no sorrow of heart  
on account of offending ,god4  ,one day 
when ,i was in a tavern with some of my 
wild fellow-students1 ,i saw among them 
one of my former school-fellows1 named  
,beta1 whom ,i had known four years     
before at ,halberstadt1 but whom at that
 time had despised1 because he was so   
quiet and serious4 ,it now appeared well

 to me to choose him as my friend1      
thinking that if ,i could but have      
better companions1 ,i should by that    
means improve my own conduct4 ,i entered
 into familiar discourse with him1 and  
we were soon much knit to one another4  
,cursed be the man that trusteth in man1
 and maketh flesh his arm4 ,jeremiah    
xvii4 #e4  ,this ,beta was a backslider4
 ,when formerly he was so quiet at      
school1 ,i have reason to believe it was
 because the ,spirit of ,god was working
 on his heart2 but now1 having departed 
from the ,lord1 he tried to put off the 
ways of ,god more and more1 and to enjoy
 the world of which he had known but    
little before4 ,i sought his friendship 
because ,i thought it would lead me to a
 steady life2 and he gladly formed an   
acquaintance with me1 as he told me     
afterwards1 because he thought it would 
bring him into gay society4 ,thus my    
poor foolish heart was again deceived4  
,and yet1 ,god1 in ,his abundant mercy1 
made him1 after all1 in a way which was 

never thought of by me1 the instrument  
of doing me good1 not merely for time1  
but for eternity4  ,about this period1  
,june #ahbe1 ,i was again taken ill in  
consequence of my profligate and vicious
 life4 ,my state of health would        
therefore no longer allow me to go on in
 the same course1 but my desires were   
still unchanged4 ,about the end of ,july
 ,i recovered4 ,after this1 my conduct  
was outwardly rather better2 but this   
arose only from want of money4 ,at the  
commencement of ,august1 ,beta and ,i   
with two other students1 drove about the
 country1 for four days4 ,all the money 
for this expensive pleasure had been    
obtained by pledging some of our        
remaining articles4 ,when we returned1  
instead of being truly sorry on account 
of this sin1 we thought of fresh        
pleasures1 and1 as my love for traveling
 was stronger than ever1 through what ,i
 had seen on this last journey1 ,i      
proposed to my friends to set off for   
,switzerland4 ,the obstacles in the way1

 the want of money1 and the want of the 
passports1 were removed by me4 ,for1    
through forged letters from our parents1
 we procured passports2 and through     
pledging all we could1 particularly our 
books1 we obtained as much money as we  
thought would be enough4 ,beta was one  
of the party4  ,on ,august #ahth we left
 ,halle4 ,it will be enough to say that 
we went as far as ,mount ,rigi in       
,switzerland1 by the way of ,erfurt1    
,frankfort1 ,heidelberg1 ,stuttgart1    
,zurich1 and returned by the way of     
,constance1 ,ulm1 and ,nuremberg4       
,forty-three days we were1 day after    
day1 traveling1 almost always on foot4  
,i had now obtained the desire of my    
heart4 ,i had seen ,switzerland4 ,but   
still ,i was far from being happy4 ,the 
,lord most graciously preserved us from 
many calamitous circumstances1 which1   
but for ,his gracious providence1 might 
have overtaken us4 ,but ,i did not see  
,his hand at that time1 as ,i have seen 
it since4 ,sickness of one or more of   

us1 or separation from one another1     
which might have so easily befallen us1 
would have brought us1 being so far from
 home1 and having but just as much money
 as was absolutely needed1 into a most  
miserable condition4 ,i was on this     
journey like ,judas2 for1 having the    
common purse1 ,i was a thief4 ,i managed
 so1 that the journey cost me but       
two-thirds of what it cost my friends4  
,oh6 how wicked was ,i now4 ,at last all
 of us became tired of seeing even the  
most beautiful views2 and whilst at     
first1 after having seen certain scenes1
 ,i had been saying with ,horace1 at the
 end of the day1 in my pagan heart1     
,vixi1 7,i have lived71 ,i was now glad 
to get home again4  ,september #bith we 
reached ,halle1 from whence each of us1 
for the remainder of the vacation1 went 
to his father's house4 ,i had now1 by   
many lies1 to satisfy my father         
concerning the traveling expenses1 and  
succeeded in deceiving him4 ,during the 
three weeks ,i stayed at home ,i        

determined to live differently for the  
future4 ,once more the ,lord showed me  
what resolutions come to1 when made in  
man's strength4 ,i was different for a  
few days2 but when the vacation was     
over1 and fresh students came1 and1 with
 them1 fresh money1 all was soon        
forgotten4  ,at that time ,halle was    
frequented by #abfj students1 about #ijj
 of whom studied divinity1 all of which 
#ijj were allowed to preach1 although1  
,i have reason to believe1 not nine of  
them feared the ,lord4  ,the time was   
now come when ,god would have mercy upon
 me4 ,his love had been set upon such a 
wretch as ,i was before the world was   
made4 ,his love had sent ,his ,son to   
bear the punishment due to me on account
 of my sins1 and to fulfill the law     
which ,i had broken times without       
number4 ,and now at a time when ,i was  
as careless about ,him as ever1 ,he sent
 ,his ,spirit into my heart4 ,i had no  
,bible1 and had not read in it for      
years4 ,i went to church but seldom2    

but1 from custom1 ,i took the ,lord's   
supper twice a year4 ,i had never heard 
the gospel preached1 up to the beginning
 of ,november #ahbe4 ,i had never met   
with a person who told me that he meant1
 by the help of ,god1 to live according 
to the ,holy ,scriptures4 ,in short1 ,i 
had not the least idea1 that there were 
any persons really different from       
myself1 except in degree4  ,one         
,saturday afternoon1 about the middle of
 ,november #ahbe1 ,i had taken a walk   
with my friend ,beta4 ,on our return he 
said to me1 that he was in the habit of 
going on ,saturday evenings to the house
 of a ,christian1 where there was a     
meeting4 ,on further enquiry he told me 
that they read the ,bible1 sang1 prayed1
 and read a printed sermon4 ,no sooner  
had ,i heard this1 than it was to me as 
if ,i had found something after which ,i
 had been seeking all my life long4 ,i  
immediately wished to go with my friend1
 who was not at once willing to take me2
 for knowing me as a gay young man1 he  

thought ,i should not like this meeting4
 ,at last1 however1 he said he would    
call for me4--,i would here mention1    
that ,beta seems to have had conviction 
of sin1 and probably also a degree of   
acquaintance with the ,lord1 when about 
fifteen years old4 ,afterwards1 being in
 a cold and worldly state1 he joined me 
in this sinful ,journey to ,switzerland4
 ,on his return1 however1 being         
extremely miserable1 and convinced of   
his guilt1 he made a full confession of 
his sin to his father2 and whilst with  
him1 sought the acquaintance of a       
,christian brother1 named ,richter4     
,this ,dr4 ,richter1 who himself had    
studied a few years before at ,halle1   
gave him1 on his return to the          
university1 a letter of introduction to 
a believing tradesman1 of the name of   
,wagner4 ,it was this brother1          
concerning whom ,beta spoke to me1 and  
in whose house the meeting was held4    
,we went together in the evening4 ,as ,i
 did not know the manners of believers1 

and the joy they have in seeing poor    
sinners1 even in any measure caring     
about the things of ,god1 ,i made an    
apology for coming4 ,the kind answer of 
this dear brother ,i shall never forget4
 ,he said3 ,come as often as you please2
 house and heart are open to you4 ,we   
sat down and sang a hymn4 ,then brother 
,kayser1 now a missionary in ,africa1 in
 connection with the ,london ,missionary
 ,society1 who was then living at       
,halle1 fell on his knees1 and asked a  
blessing on our meeting4 ,this kneeling 
down made a deep impression upon me2 for
 ,i had never either seen any one on his
 knees1 nor had ,i ever myself prayed on
 my knees4 ,he then read a chapter and a
 printed sermon2 for no regular meetings
 for expounding the ,scriptures were    
allowed in ,prussia1 except an ordained 
clergyman was present4 ,at the close we 
sang another hymn1 and then the master  
of the house prayed4 ,whilst he prayed1 
my feeling was something like this3 ,i  
could not pray as well1 though ,i am    

much more learned than this illiterate  
man4 ,the whole made a deep impression  
on me4 ,i was happy2 though1 if ,i had  
been asked1 why ,i was happy1 ,i could  
not have clearly explained it4  ,when we
 walked home1 ,i said to ,beta1 ,all we 
have seen on our journey to             
,switzerland1 and all our former        
pleasures1 are as nothing in comparison 
with this evening4 ,whether ,i fell on  
my knees when ,i returned home1 ,i do   
not remember2 but this ,i know1 that ,i 
lay peaceful and happy in my bed4 ,this 
shows that the ,lord may begin ,his work
 in different ways4 ,for ,i have not the
 least doubt1 that on that evening1 ,he 
began a work of grace in me1 though ,i  
obtained joy without any deep sorrow of 
heart1 and with scarcely any knowledge4 
,that evening was the turning point in  
my life4--,the next day1 and ,monday1   
and once or twice besides1 ,i went again
 to the house of this brother1 where ,i 
read the ,scriptures with him and       
another brother2 for it was too long for

 me to wait till ,saturday came again4  
,now my life became very different1     
though not so1 that all sins were given 
up at once4 ,my wicked companions were  
given up2 the going to taverns was      
entirely discontinued2 the habitual     
practice of telling falsehoods was no   
longer indulged in1 but still a few     
times after this ,i spoke an            
untruth4--,at the time when this change 
took place1 ,i was engaged in           
translating a novel out of ,french into 
,german1 for the press1 in order to     
obtain the means of gratifying my desire
 to see ,paris1 c4 ,this plan about the 
journey was now given up1 though ,i had 
not light enough to give up the work in 
which ,i was engaged1 but finished it4  
,the ,lord1 however1 most remarkably put
 various obstacles in the way and did   
not allow me to sell the manuscript4 ,at
 last1 seeing that the whole was wrong1 
,i determined never to sell it1 and was 
enabled to abide by this determination4 
,the manuscript was burnt4  ,i now no   

longer lived habitually in sin1 though  
,i was still often overcome1 and        
sometimes even by open sins1 though far 
less frequently than before1 and not    
without sorrow of heart4 ,i read the    
,scriptures1 prayed often1 loved the    
brethren1 went to church from right     
motives1 and stood on the side of       
,christ2 though laughed at by my        
fellow-students4  ,it had pleased ,god  
to teach me something of the meaning of 
that precious truth3 ,god so loved the  
world1 that ,he gave ,his only begotten 
,son1 that whosoever believeth in ,him  
should not perish1 but have everlasting 
life4 ,i understood something of the    
reason why the ,lord ,jesus died on the 
cross1 and suffered such agonies in the 
,garden of ,gethsemane3 even that thus1 
bearing the punishment due to us1 we    
might not have to bear it ourselves4    
,and1 therefore1 apprehending in some   
measure the love of ,jesus for my soul1 
,i was constrained to love ,him in      
return4 ,what all the exhortations and  

precepts of my father and others could  
not effect2 what all my own resolutions 
could not bring about1 even to renounce 
a life of sin and profligacy3 ,i was    
enabled to do1 constrained by the love  
of ,jesus4 ,the individual who desires  
to have his sins forgiven1 must seek for
 it through the blood of ,jesus4 ,the   
individual who desires to get power over
 sin1 must likewise seek it through the 
blood of ,jesus4  ,in ,january #ahbf1 ,i
 began to read missionary papers1 and   
was greatly stirred up to become a      
missionary myself4 ,i prayed frequently 
concerning this matter1 and thus made   
more decided progress for a few weeks4  
,but soon1 alas6 ,i was drawn aside4 ,i 
used frequently to meet a young female1 
who also came to the meetings on        
,saturday evenings2 and being the only  
pious female of my own age1 whom ,i     
knew1 ,i soon felt myself greatly       
attached to her4 ,this led away my heart
 from missionary work1 for ,i had reason
 to believe that her parents would not  

allow her to go with me4 ,my prayers now
 became cold and formal1 and at length  
were almost entirely given up4 ,my joy  
in the ,lord left me4 ,in this state ,i 
continued for about six weeks4 ,at the  
end of that time1 about ,easter #ahbf1  
,i saw a devoted young brother1 named   
,hermann ,ball1 a learned man1 and of   
wealthy parents1 who1 constrained by the
 love of ,christ1 preferred labouring in
 ,poland among the ,jews as a           
missionary1 to having a comfortable     
living near his relations4 ,his example 
made a deep impression on me4 ,i was led
 to apply his case to my own1 and to    
compare myself with him2 for ,i had     
given up the work of the ,lord1 and1 ,i 
may say1 the ,lord ,himself1 for the    
sake of a girl4 ,the result of this     
comparison was1 that ,i was enabled to  
give up this connexion1 which ,i had    
entered into without prayer1 and which  
thus had led me away from the ,lord4    
,when ,i was enabled to be decided1 the 
,lord smiled on me1 and ,i was1 for the 

first time in my life1 able fully and   
unreservedly to give up myself to ,him4 
,it was at this time that ,i began truly
 to enjoy the peace of ,god1 which      
passeth all understanding4 ,in this my  
joy ,i wrote to my father and brother1  
entreating them to seek the ,lord1 and  
telling them how happy ,i was2 thinking1
 that if the way to happiness were but  
set before them1 they would gladly      
embrace it4 ,to my great surprise an    
angry answer was returned4--,about this 
period the ,lord sent a believer1 ,dr4  
,tholuck1 as professor of divinity to   
,halle1 in consequence of which a few   
believing students came from other      
universities4 ,thus also1 through       
becoming acquainted with other brethren1
 the ,lord led me on4  ,with the revival
 of the work of grace in my heart1 after
 the snare above referred to had been   
broken1 my former desire1 to give myself
 to missionary service1 returned1 and ,i
 went at last to my father to obtain his
 permission1 without which ,i could not 

be received into any of the ,german     
missionary institutions4 ,my father was 
greatly displeased1 and particularly    
reproached me1 saying that he had       
expended so much money on my education1 
in hope that he might comfortably spend 
his last days with me in a parsonage1   
and that he now saw all these prospects 
come to nothing4 ,he was angry1 and told
 me he would no longer consider me as   
his son4 ,but the ,lord gave me grace to
 remain steadfast4 ,he then entreated   
me1 and wept before me2 yet even this by
 far harder trial the ,lord enabled me  
to bear4 ,before ,i went away ,i took an
 opportunity of reminding my brother of 
my former wicked life1 and told him that
 now1 having been thus blessed by ,god1 
,i could not but live for ,him4 ,after  
,i had left my father1 though ,i wanted 
more money than at any previous period  
of my life1 as ,i had to remain two     
years longer in the university1 ,i      
determined1 never to take any more from 
him2 for it seemed to me wrong1 so far  

as ,i remember1 to suffer myself to be  
supported by him1 when he had no        
prospect that ,i should become1 what he 
would wish me to be1 namely1 a clergyman
 with a good living4 ,this resolution ,i
 was enabled to keep4  ,by the way ,i   
would here observe1 that the ,lord      
afterwards1 in a most remarkable way1   
supplied my temporal wants4 ,for shortly
 after this had occurred1 several       
,american gentlemen1 three of whom were 
professors in ,american colleges1 came  
to ,halle for literary purposes2 and as 
they did not understand ,german1 ,i was 
recommended by ,dr4 ,tholuck to teach   
them4 ,these gentlemen1 some of whom    
were believers1 paid so handsomely for  
the instruction which ,i gave them1 and 
for the lectures of certain professors  
which ,i wrote out for them1 that ,i had
 enough and to spare4 ,thus did the     
,lord richly make up to me the little   
which ,i had relinquished for ,his sake4
 #j fear the ,lord1 ye ,his saints2 for 
there is no want to them that fear ,him4

 ,psalm xxxiv4 #i4  ,on my return from  
my father to ,halle1 ,i found that the  
more experienced brethren thought that  
,i ought for the present to take no     
further steps respecting my desire to go
 out as a missionary4 ,but still it was 
more or less in my mind4--,whitsuntide  
and the two days following ,i spent in  
the house of a pious clergyman in the   
country3 for all the ministers at       
,halle1 a town of more than #cj1jjj     
inhabitants1 were unenlightened men1    
,god greatly refreshed me through this  
visit4 ,dear ,beta was with me4 ,on our 
return we related to two of our former  
friends1 whose society we had not quite 
given up1 though we did not any longer  
live with them in sin1 how happy we had 
been on our visit4 ,i then told them how
 ,i wished they were as happy as        
ourselves4 ,they answered1 we do not    
feel that we are sinners4 ,after this ,i
 fell on my knees1 and asked ,god to    
show them that they were sinners4       
,having done so1 ,i left them1 and went 

into my bed-room1 where ,i continued to 
pray for them4 ,after a little while ,i 
returned to my sitting-room1 and found  
them both in tears1 and both told me    
that they now felt themselves to be     
sinners4 ,from that time a work of grace
 commenced in their hearts4  ,shortly   
after this1 being still greatly         
exercised about going out as a          
missionary1 and wishing much 7according 
to my natural mind1 as ,i now see17 to  
have the matter settled1 in one way or  
the other1 without being willing        
quietly1 patiently1 and prayerfully to  
wait on the ,lord1 ,i came to the       
conclusion to ascertain the ,lord's mind
 by the lot4 ,to this end ,i not merely 
drew a lot in private1 but ,i bought a  
ticket in the royal lottery2 and ,i left
 it thus with the ,lord1 that if ,i     
gained any thing1 ,i should take it to  
be ,his will that ,i should become a    
missionary1 if not1 that ,i should      
remain at home4 ,my ticket came out with
 a small sum1 on account of which it    

appeared to me that ,i should be a      
missionary4 ,i therefore applied to the 
,berlin ,missionary ,society1 but was   
not accepted1 because my father had not 
given his consent4  ,very soon          
afterwards ,i was led to see in some    
degree1 and since then much more fully1 
the error into which ,i had fallen      
respecting the lot4 ,in the first place 
it was altogether wrong1 that ,i1 a     
child of ,god1 should have any thing to 
do with so worldly a system as that of  
the lottery4 ,but it was also           
unscriptural to go to the lot at all for
 the sake of ascertaining the ,lord's   
mind1 and this ,i ground on the         
following reasons4 ,we have neither a   
commandment of ,god for it1 nor the     
example of our ,lord1 nor that of the   
apostles1 after the ,holy ,spirit had   
been given on the day of ,pentecost4 #a4
 ,we have many exhortations in the word 
of ,god to seek to know ,his mind by    
prayer and searching the ,holy          
,scriptures1 but no passage which       

exhorts us to use the lot4 #b4 ,the     
example of the apostles 7,acts i47 in   
using the lot1 in the choice of an      
apostle1 in the room of ,judas          
,iscariot1 is the only passage1 which   
can be brought in favour of the lot1    
from the ,new ,testament1 7and to the   
,old we have not to go under this       
dispensation1 for the sake of           
ascertaining how we ought to live as    
disciples of ,christ74 ,now concerning  
this circumstance we have to remember1  
that the ,spirit was not yet given      
7,john vii4 #ci2 ch4 xiv4 #af1 #ag2 ch4 
xvi4 #g1 #ac71 by whose teaching        
especially it is that we may know the   
mind of the ,lord2 and hence we find1   
that1 after the day of ,pentecost1 the  
lot was no more used1 but the apostles  
gave themselves to prayer and fasting to
 ascertain how they ought to act4  ,in  
addition to this ,i would give my own   
experience concerning the lot1 but only 
by way of illustrating the view just    
given2 for the word of ,god is quite    

sufficient on the subject4 ,and first as
 it regards my using the lot in the     
above case4 ,how did it turn out8 ,i had
 repeatedly asked the ,lord to show me  
,his mind1 whether ,he would have me to 
be a missionary or not4 ,but not coming 
to a satisfactory assurance1 and being  
very anxious to have the matter settled1
 ,i found out in my own judgment a much 
shorter way1 namely1 the lot4 ,i ought  
to have said to myself1 how can an      
individual1 so ignorant as you are1     
think about being a teacher to others8  
,for though ,i was truly begotten again1
 and rested upon ,christ alone for      
salvation1 still ,i should not have been
 able to give a clear explanation of    
even the most elementary truths of the  
,gospel4 ,how then could ,i be fit to   
teach others8 ,the first thing therefore
 ,i ought to have done1 was1 to seek    
through much prayer1 and searching the  
,scriptures1 and a holy life1 to obtain 
more knowledge of divine things4        
,further1 as to my impatience in wishing

 the matter settled1 how could ,i have  
been fit to endure in that state the    
hardships and trials of a missionary    
life1 in which my patience1 no doubt1   
would have been much more severely      
tried8 ,i therefore ought to have said  
to myself1 if ,i cannot wait quietly1   
though it be many months longer1 before 
the ,lord shows me clearly ,his will    
concerning the matter1 how then can ,i  
be fit for missionary work8 ,instead of 
thus comparing my state of heart and    
knowledge1 with what is required in the 
,scriptures from him who is to be a     
teacher1 ,i ran hastily to the lot1 and 
thought ,i had done it prayerfully4 ,and
 how did it end8 ,according to my       
prayers the lot decided ,i should be a  
missionary among the heathen 7and my    
mind1 at that time1 especially inclined 
to the ,east ,indies74 ,but the way in  
which the ,lord has led me since has    
been very different4 ,and it ought not  
to be said in defense of the practice of
 deciding by lot--,perhaps the ,lord    

meant you to be a missionary among the  
heathen1 but you did not give yourself  
to the work8 for ,i actually offered    
myself to a society1 but was not        
accepted4 ,moreover1 since #ahbf ,i have
 repeatedly offered myself most solemnly
 to the ,lord for this work1 and am as  
sure that it is not ,his will that ,i   
should go out a missionary for the      
present1 as ,i am sure of any thing4    
,nor could it be said1 that perhaps the 
,lord yet may call me for this work4    
,for if ,he should be pleased to do so  
tomorrow1 yet that would prove nothing  
concerning the above point4 ,for ,i did 
not use the lot to ascertain whether at 
any period of my life ,i should be      
engaged in missionary work1 but whether 
,i should then set about it4 ,and to put
 such an explanation on the matter1     
would be acting as false prophets1 who1 
when their prophecies fail1 try to find 
out some way or other1 whereby they may 
show that their prophecies were true4   
,about two years after ,i used the lot  

in another instance4 ,i went one day to 
a village about fifteen miles from      
,halle1 to see the few believers there4 
,when ,i was about three miles from the 
place1 it began to get dark2 and finding
 myself in a spot where the road        
divided1 and not knowing which way ,i   
should choose1 ,i was greatly perplexed4
 ,i stood a moment1 and then prayed to  
,god to show me by the lot1 which was   
the right way4 ,now1 truly one may say1 
if the use of the lot in our day is     
according to the will of ,god1 this was 
particularly a case for the ,lord to    
direct me through this means4 ,for here 
was one of ,his children in need1       
looking up to his ,father to help him1  
through the lot1 out of his difficulty1 
and this ,his child also on a journey in
 ,his service4 ,i drew the lot and went 
the way to the left4 ,after some time ,i
 found ,i was on the wrong road4 ,now1  
at last1 as ,i did not know how to get  
into the right one1 ,i did what ,i ought
 to have done before1 and what ,i       

believe to be a scriptural way of       
acting2 ,i prayed that the ,lord        
graciously would send some one to put me
 into the right way2 and almost         
immediately a carriage came up1 and ,i  
was directed on my journey4  ,in one    
other instance ,i used the lot some     
years after4 ,it concerned a most       
important matter1 important for my whole
 life4 ,i had then a degree of          
conviction1 that ,i ought prayerfully   
and patiently to wait for the ,lord's   
decision4 ,but my natural mind would    
have the decision at once1 and thus     
after prayer ,i drew the lot1 to have   
the matter in one way or other settled4 
,but facts turned out completely        
different from what the lot decided4    
,to ascertain the ,lord's will we ought 
to use scriptural means4 ,prayer1 the   
word of ,god1 and ,his ,spirit should be
 united together4 ,we should go to the  
,lord repeatedly in prayer1 and ask ,him
 to teach us by ,his ,spirit through    
,his word4 ,i say1 by ,his ,spirit      

through ,his word4 ,for if we should    
think that ,his ,spirit led us to do so 
and so1 because certain facts are so and
 so1 and yet ,his word is opposed to the
 step which we are going to take1 we    
should be deceiving ourselves4  ,for    
instance3 ,a brother in business thinks 
he ought to leave the house in which he 
lives1 because it is not in a good      
situation4 ,he wishes to know the       
,lord's mind1 as he says1 and prays     
about the matter4 ,after a few days1    
unexpectedly1 a house is offered to him 
without seeking after it1 in a much     
better situation4 ,the house is very    
suitable1 as he thinks2 the rent very   
moderate2 and moreover the person who   
offers him the house tells him1 that1   
because he is a believer he will let him
 have it at this cheap rent4 ,there is1 
however1 this scriptural objection in   
the way4 ,if he goes into this house1 he
 must carry on so large a business1 to  
cover his expenses1 that his time will  
be so occupied as to encroach upon those

 hours1 which ought to be devoted to his
 spiritual interests4 ,now the          
scriptural way of deciding would be     
this3 ,no situation1 no business will be
 given to me by ,god1 in which ,i have  
not time enough to care about my soul   
7,matthew vi4 #cc74 ,therefore1 however 
outward circumstances may appear1 it can
 only be considered as permitted of     
,god1 to prove the genuineness of my    
love1 faith1 and obedience1 but by no   
means as the leading of ,his providence 
to induce me to act contrary to ,his    
revealed will4  ,in connexion with this 
,i would mention1 that the ,lord very   
graciously gave me1 from the very       
commencement of my divine life1 a       
measure of simplicity and of childlike  
disposition in spiritual things1 so that
 whilst ,i was exceedingly ignorant of  
the ,scriptures1 and was still from time
 to time overcome even by outward sins1 
yet ,i was enabled to carry most minute 
matters to the ,lord in prayer4 ,and ,i 
have found godliness profitable unto all

 things1 having promise of the life that
 now is1 and of that which is to come4  
,though very weak and ignorant1 yet ,i  
had now1 by the grace of ,god1 some     
desire to benefit others1 and he who so 
faithfully had once served ,satan1      
sought now to win souls for ,christ4  ,i
 may mention a few instances4 ,i        
circulated every month1 in different    
parts of the country1 about #cjj        
missionary papers4 ,i also sold and     
distributed a considerable number of    
tracts1 and often took my pockets full  
in my walks1 and distributed them1 and  
spoke to poor people whom ,i met4 ,i    
also wrote letters to some of my former 
companions in sin4 ,i visited for       
thirteen weeks a sick man1 who1 when ,i 
first began to speak to him about the   
things of ,god1 was completely ignorant 
of his state as a sinner1 trusting for  
salvation in his upright and moral life4
 ,after some weeks1 however1 the ,lord  
allowed me to see a decided change in   
him1 and he afterwards repeatedly       

expressed his gratitude1 that ,i had    
been sent to him by ,god1 to be the     
means of opening his blind eyes4 ,may   
this encourage the believing reader to  
sow the seed1 though he does not see it 
spring up at once4  ,thus the ,lord     
condescended to begin to use me soon    
after my conversion1 though but little2 
for ,i could bear but very little1 as ,i
 did not see at that time1 as ,i do now1
 that ,god alone can give spiritual life
 at the first1 and keep it up in the    
soul afterwards4 ,how imperfectly1      
however1 on account of my ignorance1    
some of these things were done1 ,i will 
show by the following instance4 ,once ,i
 met a beggar in the fields1 and spoke  
to him about his soul4 ,but when ,i     
perceived it made no impression upon    
him1 ,i spoke more loudly2 and when he  
still remained unmoved1 ,i quite bawled 
in talking to him2 till at last ,i went 
away1 seeing it was of no use4 ,though  
none had sought the ,lord less than     
myself1 when ,he was pleased to begin   

,his work in me2 yet so ignorant was ,i 
of the work of the ,spirit1 that ,i     
thought my speaking very loudly would   
force him into repentance towards ,god1 
and faith in the ,lord ,jesus4  ,having 
heard that there was a schoolmaster     
living in a village1 about six miles    
from ,halls1 who was in the habit of    
holding a prayer meeting at four o'clock
 every morning1 with the miners1 before 
they went into the pit1 giving them also
 an address1 ,i thought he was a        
believer2 and as ,i knew so very few    
brethren1 ,i went to see him1 in order1 
if it might be1 to strengthen his hands4
 ,about two years afterwards he told me1
 that when ,i came to him first1 he knew
 not the ,lord1 but that he had held    
these prayer-meetings merely out of     
kindness to a relative1 whose office it 
was1 but who bad gone on a journey2 and 
that those addresses which lie had read 
were not his own1 but copied out of a   
book4 ,he also told me1 that he was much
 impressed with my kindness1 and1 what  

he considered condescension on my part  
in coming to see him1 and this1 together
 with my conversation1 had been         
instrumental in leading him to care     
about the things of ,god2 and ,i knew   
him ever afterwards as a true believer4 
,this schoolmaster asked me1 whether ,i 
would not preach in his parish1 as the  
aged and infirm clergyman would be very 
glad of my assistance4 ,up to this time 
,i had never preached1 though for       
fifteen months past ,i might have done  
so as a student of divinity2 for before 
,christmas #ahbe ,i had been mercifully 
kept from attempting to preach1 7though 
,i wrote to my father about ,july that  
,i had preached1 because ,i knew it     
would please him71 and after ,christmas1
 when ,i knew the ,lord1 ,i refrained   
from doing so1 because ,i felt that ,i  
was yet too little instructed in the    
things of ,god4 ,the same reason ought  
to have still kept me from preaching2   
yet ,i thought1 that1 by taking a       
sermon1 or the greater part of one1     

written by a spiritual man1 and         
committing it to memory1 ,i might       
benefit the people4 ,had ,i reasoned    
scripturally1 ,i should have said1      
surely it cannot be the will of ,god1   
that ,i should preach in this way1 if ,i
 have not enough knowledge of the       
,scriptures to write a sermon4          
,moreover1 ,i had not enough light nor  
tenderness of conscience to see1 that ,i
 was a deceiver in the pulpit2 for every
 body supposes1 that the sermon a man   
preaches is1 if not entirely1 at least  
as to the most part1 his own            
composition4  ,i now set about putting a
 printed sermon into a suitable form1   
and committing it to memory4 ,it was    
hard work4 ,there is no joy in man's own
 doings and choosings4 ,it took me      
nearly a whole week to commit to memory 
such a sermon as would take up nearly an
 hour in repeating4 ,i got through it1  
but had no enjoyment in the work4 ,it   
was on ,august #bg1 #ahbf1 at eight in  
the morning1 in a chapel of ease1 in    

connexion with which my friend was      
schoolmaster4#e ,at eleven ,i repeated  
the same sermon verbatim in the parish  
church4 ,there was one service more1 in 
the afternoon1 at which ,i needed not to
 have done any thing2 for the           
schoolmaster might have read a printed  
sermon1 as he used to do4 ,but having a 
desire to serve the ,lord1 though ,i    
often knew not how to do it             
scripturally2 and knowing that this aged
 and unenlightened clergyman had had    
this living for forty-eight years1 and  
having therefore reason to believe1 that
 the gospel scarcely ever had been      
preached in that place2 ,i had it in my 
heart to preach again in the afternoon4 
,but ,i had no second sermon committed  
to memory4 ,it came1 however1 to my mind
 to read the #eth chapter of ,matthew1  
and to make such remarks as ,i was able4
 ,i did so4 ,immediately upon beginning 
to expound ,blessed are the poor in     
spirit1 c4 ,i felt myself greatly       
assisted2 and whereas in the morning my 

sermon had not been simple enough for   
the people to understand it1 ,i now was 
listened to with the greatest attention1
 and ,i think was also understood4 ,my  
own peace and joy were great4 ,i felt   
this a blessed work4 ,after the service 
,i left the aged clergyman as soon as   
possible1 lest ,i should lose my        
enjoyment4  ,on my way to ,halle ,i     
thought1 this is the way ,i should like 
always to preach4 ,but then it came     
immediately to my mind1 that such sort  
of preaching might do for illiterate    
country people1 but that it never would 
do before a well educated assembly in   
town4 ,i thought1 the truth ought to be 
preached at all hazards1 but it ought to
 be given in a different form1 suited to
 the hearers4 ,thus ,i remained         
unsettled in my mind as it regards the  
mode of preaching2 and it is not        
surprising that ,i did not then see the 
truth concerning this matter1 for ,i did
 not understand the work of the ,spirit1
 and therefore saw not the powerlessness

 of human eloquence4 ,further1 ,i did   
not keep in mind1 that if the most      
illiterate persons in the congregation  
can comprehend the discourse1 the most  
educated will understand it too2 but    
that the reverse does not hold true4    
,it was not till three years afterwards 
that ,i was led1 through grace1 to see  
what ,i now consider the right mode of  
preparation for the public preaching of 
the ,word4 ,but about this1 if ,god     
permit1 ,i will say more when ,i come to
 that period of my life4  ,i now        
preached frequently1 both in the        
churches of villages and towns1 but     
never had any enjoyment in doing so1    
except when speaking in a simple way2   
though the repetition of sermons1 which 
had been committed to memory1 brought   
more praise from my fellow-creatures4   
,but from neither way of preaching did  
,i see any fruit4 ,it may be1 that the  
last day may show the benefit even of   
these feeble endeavours4 ,one reason why
 the ,lord did not permit me to see     

fruit1 seems to me1 that ,i should have 
been most probably lifted up by success4
 ,it may be also1 because ,i prayed     
exceedingly little respecting the       
ministry of the ,word1 and because ,i   
walked so little with ,god1 and was so  
rarely a vessel unto honour1 sanctified1
 and meet for the ,master's use4  ,about
 the time that ,i first began to preach 
,i lived for about two months in free   
lodgings1 provided for poor students of 
divinity in the ,orphan-,house1 built in
 dependence upon ,god1 by that devoted  
and eminent servant of ,christ1 ,a4 ,h4 
,franke1 ,professor of ,divinity at     
,halle1 who died #agbg4 ,i mention this1
 as some years afterwards ,i was        
benefited myself through the faith of   
this dear man of ,god4--,about that time
 ,i was still so weak that ,i fell      
repeatedly into open sins1 yet could not
 continue in them1 nay1 not even for a  
few days1 without sorrow of heart1      
confession before ,god1 and fleeing to  
the blood of the ,lamb4 ,and so ignorant

 was ,i still1 that ,i bought a crucifix
 in a frame1 and hung it up in my room1 
hoping that being thus frequently       
reminded of the sufferings of my        
,saviour1 ,i should not fall so         
frequently into sin4 ,but in a few days 
the looking to the crucifix was as      
nothing1 and ,i fell about that very    
time more than once deeply4  ,about this
 time ,i formed an intimate acquaintance
 with a brother1 who was also a divinity
 student3 and as we loved one another so
 much1 and were so happy in one         
another's society1 we thought that it   
would greatly add to our joy1 and to one
 another's benefit1 to live together1   
and that thus we might mutually help one
 another4 ,accordingly in ,september    
#ahbf1 ,i left the free lodgings in the 
,orphan-,house1 and lived with him4 ,but
 alas6 we were not aware1 that because  
,god is greatly glorified by the love   
and union of ,his people1 for this very 
reason ,satan particularly hates it1 and
 will1 therefore1 in every possible way1

 seek to divide them4 ,we ought to have 
especially prayed1 and that frequently1 
that the ,lord would keep us together in
 love2 instead of which1 ,i do not think
 that we at all feared disunion1 as we  
loved one another so much4 ,for this    
reason our great adversary soon got an  
advantage by our neglecting prayer      
concerning this point1 and we were      
disunited1 and love and union were not  
fully restored between us till after we 
had been for some time separated4       
,having heard that a very rich lady of  
title1 residing at                      
,frankfort-on-the-,maine1 about two     
hundred miles from ,halle1 was a very   
pious person1 and1in visiting a         
charitable institution at ,dusselthal1  
had given very liberally2 and wishing   
much about the commencement of the year 
#ahbg to help a poor relative with a    
small sum of money1 and also to pay the 
remainder of the debt which ,i had      
contracted for my traveling expenses to 
,switzerland3 ,i wrote to this lady1    

asking her to lend me a small sum of    
money1 in actual amount only little     
above ,l#e41 but1 as money in the ,north
 of ,germany has much more value than in
 ,england1 it was as much as ,l #ab4 or 
,l #ae4 in this country4 ,whilst ,i was 
writing1 however1 the thought occurred  
to me1 ,suppose this lady should not be 
a believer8 ,i1 therefore1 pointed out  
to her the way of salvation1 and related
 to her how ,i had been brought to the  
knowledge of the truth4 ,but ,i received
 no answer by the time ,i might have had
 one4--,i would just notice1 that since 
#ahbi my practice1 on account of what ,i
 found in the ,scriptures1 ,rom4 xiii4  
#h1 as it regards borrowing money1 has  
been different4 ,and1 moreover1 ,i have 
considered that there is no ground to go
 away from the door of the ,lord to that
 of a believer1 so long as ,he is so    
willing to supply our need4  ,about     
,january #bjth ,i was one day very      
wretched4 ,satan obtained an advantage  
over me through over-much work2 for ,i  

was in the habit of writing about       
fourteen hours a day4 ,one morning ,i   
was in so wretched a state1 that ,i said
 in my heart1 what have ,i now gained by
 becoming a ,christian8 ,afterwards ,i  
walked about in the streets in this     
wretched state of heart1 and at last ,i 
went into a confectioner's shop1 where  
wine and ardent spirits were sold1 to   
eat and to drink4 ,but as soon as ,i had
 taken a piece of cake ,i left the shop1
 having no rest1 as ,i felt that it was 
unbecoming a believer1 either to go to  
such places1 or to spend his money in   
such a way4 ,in the afternoon of the    
very day on which1 in the ingratitude of
 my heart1 ,i had had such unkind       
thoughts about the ,lord1 7who was at   
that very time in so remarkable a manner
 supplying my temporal wants1 by my     
being employed in writing for an        
,,american ,professor71 ,he graciously  
showed me my sin1 not by a severe       
chastisement1 as ,i most righteously    
deserved1 but by adding another mercy to

 the many ,he had already shown me4 ,oh6
 how long-suffering is our ,lord4 ,how  
does ,he bear with us6 ,may ,i at least 
now seek1 for the few days whilst ,i may
 stay in this world1 to be more grateful
 for all ,his mercies6  ,at two o'clock 
,i received a parcel from ,frankfort1   
containing the exact sum of money of    
which ,i had requested the loan4 ,there 
was no letter to be found4 ,i was       
overwhelmed with the ,lord's mercy1 but 
very much regretted that there was no   
letter4 ,at last1 on carefully examining
 the paper in which the silver had been 
packed1 ,i found one1 which ,i have     
kept1 and which ,i translate from the   
,german4  ,a peculiar providence has    
brought me acquainted with the letter   
which you have written to ,lady ,b4 ,but
 you are under a mistake concerning her1
 both as it regards her character1 and  
her stay at ,d41 where she never was4   
,she has been taken for another         
individual4 ,but that ,i may lessen in  
some measure the difficulties in which  

you seem to be1 ,i send you the enclosed
 small sum1 for which you may thank1 not
 the unknown giver1 but the ,lord1 who  
turneth the hearts like rivers of water4
 ,hold fast the faith which ,god has    
given you by ,his ,holy ,spirit2 it is  
the most precious treasure in this life1
 and it contains in itself true         
happiness4 ,only seek by watching and   
prayer more and more to be delivered    
from all vanity and self-complacency1 by
 which even the true believer may be    
ensnared when he least expects it4 ,let 
it be your chief aim to be more and more
 humble1 faithful1 and quiet4 ,may we   
not belong to those who say and write   
continually1' ,lord1' ',lord1' but who  
have ,him not deeply in their hearts4   
,christianity consists not in words1 but
 in power4 ,there must be life in us4   
,for1 therefore1 ,god loved us first    
that we might love ,him in return2 and  
that loving we might receive power1 to  
be faithful to ,him1 and to conquer     
ourselves1 the world1 distress1 and     

death4 ,may ,his ,spirit strengthen you 
for this1 that you may be an able       
messenger of ,his ,gospel6 ,amen4  ,,an 
,,adoring ,,worshipper ,,of ,,the       
,,saviour1 ,,jesus ,,christ4            
,frankfort-on-the-,maine1 ,january      
#adth1 #ahbg4  ,i saw1 in some measure1 
at the time when ,i received t letter1  
how much ,i needed such a faithful1 and1
 at the same time1 loving word of       
admonition2 but ,i have seen it more    
fully since4 ,self-complacency1 and a   
want of quietness and saying and writing
 more frequently ,lord1 ,lord1 than     
acknowledging ,him by my life as such2  
these were the evils against which at   
that time ,i particularly needed to be  
cautioned2 and up to this day ,i am     
still much1 very much1 lacking in these 
points3 though the ,lord1 to ,his praise
 ,i would say it1 has done much for me  
in these particulars since that time4   
,after having read this letter1 my heart
 was full of joy1 shame and gratitude4  
,truly it was the goodness of ,god which

 brought my heart into this state1 and  
not the money for that was gone in a few
 hours after for the two purposes above 
referred to4 ,with my heart full of     
peculiar feelings1 and ashamed of my    
conduct in the morning1 ,i left the town
 towards the evening1 to walk alone in a
 solitary place4 ,and now1 being        
particularly conscious of my ingratitude
 to the ,lord for all ,his mercies1 and 
of my want of steadfastness in ,his     
ways1 ,i could not forbear falling down 
on my knees behind a hedge1 though the  
snow was a foot deep1 anew to surrender 
myself wholly to ,him1 and to pray for  
strength that ,i might for the future   
live more to ,his glory1 and also to    
thank ,him for ,his late mercy4 ,it was 
a blessed time1 ,i continued about half 
an hour in prayer4  ,after such an      
experience1 it may be difficult for one1
 who does not know the plague of his own
 heart1 to think that ,i was at that    
time a true believer1 when ,i tell hint 
that so base was ,i1 so altogether like 

a beast before my ,god1 and unmindful of
 ,his mercies to me in ,christ1 that    
only a few weeks after ,i fell into a   
wretched backsliding state1 in which ,i 
continued for many days1 during which   
time prayer was almost entirely given   
up4 ,it was on one of these days that ,i
 rang my bell1 and ordered the servant  
to fetch me wine4 ,and now ,i began to  
drink4 ,but how good was the ,lord6     
,though ,i desired to drink1 that ,i    
might be able more easily to go on in   
sin1 yet ,he would not allow me to give 
up myself to the wickedness of my heart4
 ,for whilst in my ungodly days ,i had  
drunk once about five quarts of strong  
beer in one afternoon1 in the way of    
bravado1 and once also much wine at one 
time1 without remorse of conscience1 ,i 
could now take only two or three glasses
 before the wickedness of my conduct was
 brought before me2 and my conscience   
told me that ,i drank merely for the    
sake of drinking1 and thus ,i gave it   
up4  ,it was about this time that ,i    

formed the plan of exchanging the       
,university of ,halle for that of       
,berlin1 on account of there being a    
greater number of believing professors  
and students in the latter place4 ,but  
the whole plan was formed without       
prayer1 or at least without earnest     
prayer4 ,when1 however1 the morning came
 on which ,i had to take decided steps  
concerning it1 and to apply for the     
university-testimonials1 the ,lord      
graciously stirred me up1 prayerfully to
 consider the matter2 and finding that  
,i bad no sufficient reason for leaving 
,halle1 ,i gave up the plan1 and have   
never had reason to regret having done  
so4  ,in the vacations1 ,michaelmas1    
#ahbf1 and ,easter1 #ahbg1 and at other 
times1 ,i visited a ,moravian           
settlement1 called ,gnadau1 which was   
only about three miles distant from the 
place where my father then resided4     
,through the instrumentality of the     
brethren1 whom ,i met there1 my spirit  
was often refreshed4  ,the public means 

of grace by which ,i could be benefited 
were very few4 ,though ,i went regularly
 to church when ,i did not preach       
myself1 yet ,i scarcely ever heard the  
truth2 for there was no enlightened     
clergyman in the town4 ,and when it so  
happened that ,i could bear ,dr4        
,tholuck1 or any other godly minister1  
the prospect of it beforehand1 and the  
looking back upon it afterwards1 served 
to fill me with joy4 ,now and then ,i   
walked ten or fifteen miles to enjoy    
this privilege4 ,may those who enjoy the
 faithful ministry of the ,word feel    
exceedingly thankful for it4 ,there are 
few blessings on earth greater for a    
believer2 and yet the ,lord is          
frequently obliged to teach us the value
 of this blessing by depriving us of it 
for a season4  ,another means of grace  
which ,i attended1 besides the ,saturday
 evening meetings in brother ,wagner's  
house1 was a meeting every ,lord's day  
evening with the believing students1    
which consisted of six or more in       

number1 and increased1 before ,i left   
,halle1 to about #bj2 and which1 after  
the ,easter vacation of #ahbg1 was held 
in my room till ,i left ,halle4 ,in     
these meetings one1 or two1 or more of  
the brethren prayed1 and we read the    
,scriptures1 sang hymns1 and sometimes  
also one or another of the brethren     
spoke a little in the way of            
exhortation1 and we read also such      
writings of godly men as were calculated
 for edification4 ,i was often greatly  
stirred up and refreshed in these       
meetings2 and twice1 being in a         
backsliding state1 and therefore cold   
and miserable1 ,i opened my heart to the
 brethren1 and was brought out of that  
state through the means of their        
exhortations and prayers4 ,forsake not  
the assembling of yourselves together1  
is a most important exhortation4 ,even  
if we should not derive any especial    
benefit1 at the time1 so far as we are  
conscious1 yet we may be kept from much 
harm4 ,and very frequently the beginning

 of coldness of heart is nourished by   
keeping away from the meetings of the   
saints4 ,i know1 when ,i was cold1 and  
had no real desire to be brought out of 
that state1 ,i went a few times into the
 villages1 where ,i was sure not to meet
 with brethren1 that ,i might not be    
spoken to about the things of ,god4 ,yet
 so gracious was the ,lord1 that my very
 wretchedness brought me back after a   
few hours4 ,the ,lord had begun a good  
work in me2 and being faithful1 though  
,i was faithless1 ,he would not give me 
up1 but carried on ,his gracious work in
 me2 though it would have progressed    
much more rapidly1 had not my rebellious
 heart resisted4 ,as to the other means 
of grace ,i would say3 ,i fell into the 
snare1 into which so many young         
believers fall1 the reading of religious
 books in preference to the ,scriptures4
 ,i could no longer read ,french and    
,german novels1 as ,i had formerly done1
 to feed my carnal mind2 but still ,i   
did not put into the room of those books

 the best of all books4 ,i read tracts1 
missionary papers1 sermons1 and         
biographies of godly persons4 ,the last 
kind of books ,i found more profitable  
than others1 and had they been well     
selected1 or had ,i not read too much of
 such writings1 or had any of them      
tended particularly to endear the       
,scriptures to me1 they might have done 
me much good4--,i never had been at any 
time in my life in the habit of reading 
the ,holy ,scriptures4 ,when under      
fifteen years of age1 ,i occasionally   
read a little of them at school2        
afterwards ,god's precious book was     
entirely laid aside1 so that ,i never   
read one single chapter of it1 as far as
 ,i remember1 till it pleased ,god to   
begin a work of grace in my heart4 ,now 
the scriptural way of reasoning would   
have been3 ,god ,himself has            
condescended to become an author1 and ,i
 am ignorant about that precious book1  
which ,his ,holy ,spirit has caused to  
be written through the instrumentality  

of ,his servants1 and it contains that  
which ,i ought to know1 and the         
knowledge of which will lead me to true 
happiness2 therefore ,i ought to read   
again and again this most precious book1
 this book of books1 most earnestly1    
most prayerfully1 and with much         
meditation2 and in this practice ,i     
ought to continue all the days of my    
life4 ,for ,i was aware1 though ,i read 
it but little1 that ,i knew scarcely    
anything of it4 ,but instead of acting  
thus1 and being led by my ignorance of  
the word of ,god to study it more1 my   
difficulty in understanding it1 and the 
little enjoyment ,i had in it1 made me  
careless of reading it 7for much        
prayerful reading of the ,word1 gives   
not merely more knowledge1 but increases
 the delight we have in reading it72 and
 thus1 like many believers1 ,i          
practically preferred1 for the first    
four years of my divine life1 the works 
of uninspired men to the oracles of the 
living ,god4 ,the consequence was1 that 

,i remained a babe1 both in knowledge   
and grace4 ,in knowledge ,i say2 for all
 true knowledge must be derived1 by the 
,spirit1 from the ,word4 ,and as ,i     
neglected the ,word1 ,i was for nearly  
four years so ignorant1 that ,i did not 
clearly know even the fundamental points
 of our holy faith4 ,and this lack of   
knowledge most sadly kept me back from  
walking steadily in the ways of ,god4   
,for it is the truth that makes us free1
 7,john viii4 #ca1 #cb17 by delivering  
us from the slavery of the lusts of the 
flesh1 the lusts of the eyes1 and the   
pride of life4 ,the ,word proves it4    
,the experience of the saints proves it2
 and also my own experience most        
decidedly proves it4 ,for when it       
pleased the ,lord in ,aug4 #ahbi1 to    
bring me really to the ,scriptures1 my  
life and walk became very different4    
,and though even since that ,i have very
 much fallen short of what ,i might and 
ought to be1 yet1 by the grace of ,god1 
,i have been enabled to live much nearer

 to ,him than before4  ,if any believers
 read this1 who practically prefer other
 books to the ,holy ,scriptures1 and who
 enjoy the writings of men much more    
than the word of ,god1 may they be      
warned by my loss4 ,i shall consider    
this book to have been the means of     
doing much good1 should it please the   
,lord1 through its instrumentality1 to  
lead some of ,his people no longer to   
neglect the ,holy ,scriptures1 but to   
give them that preference1 which they   
have hitherto bestowed on the writings  
of men4 ,my dislike to increase the     
number of books would have been         
sufficient to deter me from writing     
these pages1 had ,i not been convinced1 
that this is the only way in which the  
brethren at large may be benefited      
through my mistakes and errors1 and been
 influenced by the hope1 that in answer 
to my prayers1 the reading of my        
experience may be the means of leading  
them to value the ,scriptures more      
highly1 and to make them the rule of all

 their actions4  ,before ,i leave this  
subject ,i would only add3 ,if the      
reader understands very little of the   
word of ,god1 he ought to read it very  
much2 for the ,spirit explains the ,word
 by the ,word4 ,and if he enjoys the    
reading of the ,word little1 that is    
just the reason why he should read it   
much2 for the frequent reading of the   
,scriptures creates a delight in them1  
so that the more we read them1 the more 
we desire to do so4 ,and if the reader  
should be an unbeliever1 ,i would       
likewise entreat him to read the        
,scriptures earnestly1 but to ask ,god  
previously to give him a blessing4 ,for 
in doing so1 ,god may make him wise unto
 salvation1 #b ,tim4 iii4 #af4  ,if any 
one should ask me1 how he may read the  
,scriptures most profitably1 ,i would   
advise him1 that  ,i4 ,above all he     
should seek to have it settled in his   
own mind1 that ,god alone1 by ,his      
,spirit1 can teach him1 and that        
therefore1 as ,god will be inquired of  

for blessings1 it becomes him to seek   
,god's blessing previous to reading1 and
 also whilst reading4  ,,ii4 ,he should 
have it1 moreover1 settled in his mind1 
that although the ,holy ,spirit is the  
best and sufficient teacher1 yet that   
this teacher does not always teach      
immediately when we desire it1 and that1
 therefore1 we may have to entreat ,him 
again and again for the explanation of  
certain passages2 but that ,he will     
surely teach us at last1 if indeed we   
are seeking for light prayerfully1      
patiently1 and with a view to the glory 
of ,god4  ,,iii4 ,it is of immense      
importance for the understanding of the 
word of ,god1 to read it in course1 so  
that we may read every day a portion of 
the ,old and a portion of the ,new      
,testament1 going on where we previously
 left off4 ,this is important--#a1      
because it throws light upon the        
connexion1 and a different course1      
according to which one habitually       
selects particular chapters1 will make  

it utterly impossible ever to understand
 much of the ,scriptures4 #b1 ,whilst we
 are in the body1 we need a change even 
in spiritual things1 and this change the
 ,lord has graciously provided in the   
great variety which is to be found in   
,his word4 #c1 ,it tends to the glory of
 ,god2 for the leaving out some chapters
 here and there1 is practically saying1 
that certain portions are better than   
others2 or1 that there are certain parts
 of revealed truth unprofitable or      
unnecessary4 #d1 ,it may keep us1 by the
 blessing of ,god1 from erroneous views1
 as in reading thus regularly through   
the ,scriptures1 we are led to see the  
meaning of the whole1 and also kept from
 laying too much stress upon certain    
favourite views4 #e1 ,the ,scriptures   
contain the whole revealed will of ,god1
 and therefore we ought to seek to read 
from time to time through the whole of  
that revealed will4 ,there are many     
believers1 ,i fear1 in our day1 who have
 not read even once through the whole of

 the ,scriptures2 and yet in a few      
months1 by reading only a few chapters  
every day1 they might accomplish it4    
,,iv4 ,it is also of the greatest       
importance to meditate on what we read1 
so that perhaps a small portion of that 
which we have read1 or1 if we have time1
 the whole may be meditated upon in the 
course of the day4 ,or a small portion  
of a book1 or an epistle1 or a gospel1  
through which we go regularly for       
meditation1 may be considered every day1
 without1 however1 suffering oneself to 
be brought into bondage by this plan4   
,learned commentaries ,i have found to  
store the head with many notions1 and   
often also with the truth of ,god2 but  
when the ,spirit teaches1 through the   
instrumentality of prayer and           
meditation1 the heart is affected4 ,the 
former kind of knowledge generally puffs
 up1 and is often renounced1 when       
another commentary gives a different    
opinion1 and often also is found good   
for nothing1 when it is to be carried   

out into practice4 ,the latter kind of  
knowledge generally humbles1 gives joy1 
leads us nearer to ,god1 and is not     
easily reasoned away2 and having been   
obtained from ,god1 and thus having     
entered into the heart1 and become our  
own1 is also generally carried out4 ,if 
the inquirer after truth does not       
understand the ,hebrew and ,greek       
languages1 so as to be able to compare  
the common translation with the         
original1 he may1 concerning several    
passages1 get light by an improved      
rendering1 provided he can be sure that 
the translator was a truly spiritual    
person4  ,the last and most important   
means of1 grace1 namely1 prayer1 was    
comparatively but little improved by me4
 ,i prayed1 and ,i prayed often4 ,i also
 prayed1 in general1 by the grace of    
,god1 with sincerity2 but had ,i been   
more earnestly praying1 or even only as 
much1 as ,i have prayed of late years1  
,i should have made much more rapid     
progress4  ,in ,august1 #ahbg1 ,i heard 

that the ,continental ,society in       
,england intended to send a minister to 
,bucharest1 the residence of many       
nominal ,german ,christians1 to help an 
aged brother in the work of the ,lord2  
the two other ,german ,protestant       
ministers in that place being1 the one a
 ,socinian1 and the other an            
unenlightened orthodox preacher4 ,after 
consideration and prayer ,i offered     
myself for this work to professor       
,tholuck1 who was requested to look out 
for a suitable individual2 for with all 
my weakness ,i had a great desire to    
live wholly for ,god4 ,most unexpectedly
 my father gave his consent1 though     
,bucharest was above a thousand miles   
from my home1 and as completely a       
missionary station as any other4 ,i     
considered this a remarkable providence2
 though ,i see now1 that a servant of   
,christ has to act for his ,master1     
whether it be according to the will of  
his earthly father or not4 ,i then went 
home to1 spend a short time with my     

father4 ,in the town where he lived1    
containing about #cjjj inhabitants1 ,i  
could not hear of a single believer1    
though ,i made many inquiries4 ,the time
 ,i stayed with my father was more      
profitably spent than it had formerly   
been4 ,i was enabled more than ever     
before to realize my high calling4 ,i   
had by the grace of ,god power over sin2
 at least much more than at any former  
period of my life4  ,i returned to      
,halle1 and now prepared with           
earnestness for the work of the ,lord4  
,i set before me the sufferings which   
might await me4 ,i counted the cost4    
,and he1 who once so fully-served       
,satan1 was now willing1 constrained by 
the love of ,christ1 rather to suffer   
affliction for the sake of ,jesus1 than 
to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a     
season4 ,i also prayed with1 a degree of
 earnestness concerning my future work4 
,one day1 at the end of ,october1 the   
above-mentioned brother1 ,hermann ,ball1
 missionary to the ,jews1 attended the  

,lord's day evening meeting in my room1 
on his way through ,halle1 and stated   
that he feared1 on account of his       
health1 his should be obliged to give up
 labouring among the ,jews4 ,when ,i    
heard this1 ,i felt a peculiar desire to
 fill up his place4 ,about this very    
time also ,i became exceedingly fond of 
the ,hebrew language1 which ,i had cared
 about very little up to that time1 and 
which ,i had merely studied now and     
then1 from a sense of duty4 ,but now ,i 
studied it1 for many weeks1 with the    
greatest eagerness and delight4 ,whilst 
,i thus from time to time felt a desire 
to fill up ,brother ,ball's place as a  
missionary to the ,jews1 7about which1  
however1 ,i did not seriously think1    
because ,dr4 ,tholuck daily expected a  
letter from ,london1 finally to settle  
the particulars respecting my going to  
,bucharest72 and whilst ,i thus greatly 
delighted in the study of ,hebrew3 ,i   
called in the evening of ,nov4 #agth on 
,dr4 ,tholuck4 ,in the course of        

conversation he asked me1 whether ,i had
 ever had a desire to be a missionary to
 the ,jews1 as ,i might be connected    
with the ,london ,missionary ,society1  
for promoting ,christianity among them1 
for which he was an agent4 ,i was struck
 with the question1 and told him what   
had passed in my mind1 but added that it
 was not proper to think anything about 
that1 as ,i was going to ,bucharest3 to 
which he agreed4  ,when ,i came home1   
however1 these few words were like fire 
within me4 ,the next morning ,i felt all
 desire for going to ,bucharest gone1   
which appeared to me very wrong and     
fleshly1 and ,i therefore entreated the 
,lord1 to restore to me the former      
desire for labouring on that missionary 
station4 ,he graciously did so almost   
immediately4 ,my earnestness in studying
 ,hebrew1 and my peculiar love for it1  
however1 continued4 ,about this time ,i 
had an offer of becoming tutor to the   
sons of a pious ,gentleman of title1    
which ,i did not accept on account of my

 purpose of going to ,bucharest1 and if 
that should come to nothing1 on account 
of my desire of being a missionary to   
the ,jews4  ,about ten days after1 ,dr4 
,tholuck received a letter from the     
,continental ,society1 stating1 that1 on
 account of the war between the ,turks  
and ,russians1 it appeared well to the  
committee1 for the time being to give up
 the thought of sending a minister to   
,bucharest1 as it was the seat of war   
between the two armies4 ,dr4 ,tholuck   
then asked me again1 what ,i now thought
 about being a missionary to the ,jews4 
,my reply was1 that ,i could not then   
give an answer1 but that ,i would let   
him know1 after ,i had prayerfully      
considered the matter4 ,after prayer and
 consideration1 and consulting with     
experienced brethren1 in order that they
 might probe my heart as to my motives1 
,i came to this conclusion1 that1 though
 ,i could not say with certainty it was 
the will of ,god that ,i should be a    
missionary to the ,jews1 yet1 that ,i   

ought to offer myself to the committee1 
leaving it with the ,lord to do with me 
afterwards1 as it might seem good in    
,his sight4 ,accordingly ,dr4 ,tholuck  
wrote1 about the beginning of ,december1
 #ahbg1 to the committee in ,london4    
,at ,christmas ,i spent a few days at   
,belleben1 a village about fifteen miles
 from ,halle1 where ,i had been once or 
twice before1 both for the sake of      
refreshing the few brethren living      
there1 and also of having my own spirit 
refreshed by their love4 ,one evening1  
when ,i was expounding the ,scriptures  
to them1 an unconverted young man       
happened to be present1 and it pleased  
the ,lord to touch his heart1 so that he
 was brought to the knowledge of the    
truth4  ,in the beginning of the year   
#ahbh there was a new workhouse         
established at ,halle1 into which       
persons of bad character were put for a 
time1 and made to work4 ,being disposed 
to benefit unbelievers1 ,i heartily     
desired to have permission statedly to  

preach the word of truth to them while  
,i stayed at ,halle1 particularly as ,i 
understood that one of the lecturers of 
divinity in the university1 who was a   
,socinian1 had applied for this living4 
,i wrote to the magistrates of the city1
 and offered to preach to those         
criminals gratuitously1 hoping that in  
this way there would be less objection  
to my doing so4 ,the reply was1 that    
,dr4--had applied for this living1 and  
that it had been laid before the        
provincial government for consideration1
 but that they would be glad if ,i would
 preach in the workhouse till the matter
 was decided4 ,the decision did not come
 for some time1 and ,i had thus an      
opportunity of preaching twice every    
,lord's day1 and once or twice on the   
week evenings2 and besides this ,i took 
the criminals one by one into a room1 to
 converse with them about their souls4  
,thus the ,lord condescended to give to 
one so unworthy1 so ignorant1 so weak in
 grace1 and so young in the faith and in

 years1 a most important field of       
labour4 ,however1 it was well1 that even
 under these circumstances ,i should    
have laboured there2 for humanly        
speaking1 had ,i not been there1 they   
would have had either no instruction at 
all1 or a ,socinian1 or an unenlightened
 preacher would have preached to them4  
,and besides this1 ,i had at least some 
qualification for ministering there2 for
 ,i knew the state of those poor        
sinners1 having been myself formerly1 in
 all probability1 a great deal worse    
than most of them1 and my simplicity and
 plainness of speech they would not have
 found in every minister4 ,after some   
months the matter was decided1 the      
,socinian lecturer of divinity1 ,dr4 --1
 was appointed to the living1 and ,i had
 to discontinue my labours4  ,it was not
 before ,march #ahbh1 that ,professor   
,tholuck received an answer from ,london
 respecting me1 in which the committee  
put a number of questions to me1 on the 
satisfactory answers to which my being  

received by them would depend4 ,after   
replying to this first communication1 ,i
 waited daily for an answer1 and was so 
much the more desirous of having it1 as 
my course in the university was         
completed4 ,but no answer came4 ,had my 
desire1 to serve the ,lord among the    
,jews1 been of the flesh1 it would in   
all likelihood not have continued2 but  
,i still thought about it1 and continued
 to make it a subject of prayer4 ,at    
last1 on ,june #acth1 ,i received a     
letter from ,london1 stating that the   
committee had determined1 to take me as 
a missionary student for six months on  
probation1 provided that ,i would come  
to ,london4  ,i had now had the matter  
before me about seven months1 having    
supposed1 not only that it would have   
been settled in a few weeks1 but also1  
that1 if ,i were accepted1 ,i should be 
sent out immediately1 as ,i had passed  
the university4 ,instead of this1 not   
only seven months passed over before the
 decision came1 but ,i was also expected

 to come to ,london1 and not only so1   
but1 though ,i had from my infancy been 
more or less studying1 and now at last  
wished actively to be engaged1 it was   
required that ,i should again become a  
student4 ,for a few moments1 therefore1 
,i was greatly disappointed and tried4  
,but1 on calmly considering the matter1 
it appeared to me but right that the    
committee should know me personally1 and
 that it was also well for me to know   
them more intimately than merely by     
correspondence1 as this afterwards would
 make our connexion much more           
comfortable4 ,i determined therefore1   
after ,i had seen my father1 and found  
no difficulty on his part1 to go to     
,london4  ,there was1 however1 an       
obstacle in the way of my leaving the   
country4 ,every ,prussian male subject  
is under the necessity of being for     
three years a soldier1 provided his     
state of body allows it2 but those who  
have had a classical education up to a  
certain degree1 and especially those who

 have passed the university1 need to be 
only one year in the army1 but have to  
equip and maintain themselves during    
that year4 ,now1 as ,i had been         
considered fit for service1 when ,i was 
examined in my twentieth year1 and had  
only been put back1 at my own request1  
till my twenty-third year1 and as ,i was
 now nearly twenty-three1 ,i could not  
obtain a passport out of the country1   
till ,i had either served1 my time1 or  
had been exempted by the ,king himself4 
,the latter ,i hoped would be the case2 
for it was a well known fact that those 
who had given themselves to missionary  
service1 had been always exempted4      
,certain brethren of influence1 living  
in the capital1 to whom ,i wrote on the 
subject1 advised me1 however1 to write  
first to the president of the government
 of the province to which ,i belonged4  
,this was done1 but ,i was not exempted4
 ,then those brethren wrote to the ,king
 himself2 but he replied1 that the      
matter must be referred to the ministry 

and to the law1 and no exception was    
made in my favour4  ,i now knew not what
 to do4 ,in the meantime1 at the        
beginning of ,august1 ,i was taken ill4 
,it was a common cold at first1 but ,i  
could not get rid of it1 as formerly4   
,at last a skillful physician was       
consulted1 and powerful means were used4
 ,after some time1 he prescribed tonics 
and wine4 ,for a day or two ,i seemed to
 get better1 but after that it appeared1
 by the return of giddiness in my head1 
that the tonics had been too soon       
resorted to4 ,at last1 having used still
 other means1 ,i seemed in a fit state  
for tonics1 and began again to take     
them4 ,at the same time one of my       
friends1 an ,american ,professor1 took  
me as a companion with him to ,berlin   
and other places1 so that we rode about 
the country for about ten days together4
 ,as long as ,i was day after day in the
 open air1 going from place to place1   
drinking wine and taking tonics1 ,i felt
 well2 but as soon as ,i returned to    

,hale1 the old symptoms returned4 ,a    
second time the tonics were given up1   
and the former means used4  ,about ten  
weeks had by this time passed away1     
since ,i was first taken ill4 ,this     
illness1 in which a particular care for 
the body seemed to be so right1 and in  
which therefore frequent walks were     
taken1 and in which ,i thought myself   
justified in laying aside the study of  
,hebrew1 c41 had not at all a beneficial
 effect on my soul4 ,in connexion with  
this one of my chief companions at this 
time1 the last-mentioned ,american      
,professor1 was a backslider4 ,if the   
believing reader does not know much of  
his own heart and of man's weakness1 he 
will scarcely think it possible that1   
after ,i had been borne with by the     
,lord so long1 and had received so many 
mercies at ,his hands1 and had been so  
fully and freely pardoned through the   
blood of ,jesus1 which ,i both knew from
 ,his word1 and had also enjoyed2 and   
after that ,i had been in such various  

ways engaged in the work of the ,lord2  
,i should have been once more guilty of 
great backsliding1 and that at the very 
time when the hand of ,god was lying    
heavily upon me4 ,oh6 how desperately   
wicked is the human heart4  ,it was in  
this cold state of heart1 that ,i rode  
with my friend to ,leipsic1 at the time 
of the famous ,michaelmas fair4 ,he     
wished me to go with him to the ,opera4 
,i went1 but had not the least          
enjoyment4 ,after the first act ,i took 
a glass of ice for refreshment4 ,after  
the second act ,i was taken faint in    
consequence of this1 my stomach being in
 a very weak state2 but ,i was well     
enough2 after a while1 to go to the     
hotel1 where ,i passed a tolerable      
night4 ,on the next morning my friend   
ordered the carriage for our return to  
,halle4 ,this circumstance the ,lord    
graciously used as a means of arousing  
me2 and on our way home1 ,i freely      
opened my mind to my friend about the   
way in which we had been going on2 and  

he then told me that he was in a        
different state of heart1 when he left  
,america4 ,he also told me1 when ,i was 
taken faint1 that he thought it was an  
awful place to die in4 ,this was the    
second and last time1 since ,i have     
believed in the ,lord ,jesus1 that ,i   
was in a theatre2 and but once1 in the  
year #ahbg1 ,i went to a concert1 when  
,i likewise felt1 that it was unbecoming
 for me1 as a child of ,god1 to be in   
such a place4 ,on my return to ,halle ,i
 broke a blood-vessel in my stomach1 in 
consequence of the glass of ice4 ,i was 
now exceedingly weak1 in which state ,i 
continued far several weeks1 and then   
went for change of air into the country1
 to the house of a beloved brother in   
the ,lord1 who1 up to this day1 has     
continued a kind and faithful friend to 
me4 ,my heart was now again in a better 
state than it had been before the       
rupture of the blood-vessel1 ,thus the  
,lord1 in the faithful love of ,his     
heart1 seeing that ,i was in a          

backsliding state1 chastised me for my  
profit2 and the chastisement yielded1 in
 a measure at least1 the peaceable fruit
 of righteousness4 ,heb4 xii4 #aj1 #aa4 
,whilst ,i was staying in the country1  
,i received a letter from the ,american 
,professor1 who had in the meantime     
changed ,halle for ,berlin1 and who     
wished me to come to ,berlin1 where1    
being near the ,court1 ,i should be more
 likely to obtain an exemption from my  
military duty2 and he mentioned1 at the 
same time1 that all the expenses1       
connected with my staying in ,berlin1   
would be fully covered by the           
remuneration ,i should receive for      
teaching ,german to himself and two of  
his friends1 for a few hours every week4
 ,as ,i had no more connexion with the  
university at ,halle1 my course having  
been finished for more than six months  
past1 and as ,i had the prospect of     
being spiritually benefited through my  
stay in ,berlin1 and there was no       
probability1 if ,i remained at ,halle1  

of obtaining the above-mentioned        
exemption1 ,i came to the conclusion to 
go to ,berlin4  ,two ladies of title    
traveled with me to ,berlin in a hired  
carriage4 ,as ,i knew that we should be 
for two days together1 ,i thought1 in my
 fleshly wisdom1 that though ,i ought to
 speak to them about the things of ,god1
 ,i should first show them kindness and 
attention1 and that1 after having thus  
opened a way to their hearts1 ,i might  
fully set before them their state by    
nature1 and point them to the ,lamb of  
,god4 ,we went on together most         
amicably1 ,i making only a few general  
remarks about divine things4 ,on the    
second evening1 however1 when we were   
near the end of our journey1 ,i felt    
that it was high time to speak4 ,and no 
sooner had ,i begun plainly to do so1   
than one of them replied1 ,oh6 ,sir1 ,i 
wish you had spoken sooner about these  
things1 for we have1 for a long time1   
wished to have some one to whom we might
 open our hearts2 but seeing that the   

ministers whom we know do not live      
consistently1 we have been kept from    
speaking to them4 ,i now found that they
 had been under conviction of sin for   
some time1 but did not know the way to  
obtain peace1 even by faith in the ,lord
 ,jesus4 ,after this ,i spoke freely to 
them during the hour that yet remained4 
,they parted from me under feelings of  
gratitude and regret that they could    
hear no more1 for they only passed      
through ,berlin4 ,i felt myself greatly 
reproved1 and all ,i could do was1 by a 
long letter1 to seek to make up for my  
deficiency in ministering to them on the
 journey4 ,may this circumstance never  
be forgotten by me1 and may it prove a  
blessing to the believing reader4  ,my  
chief concern now was how ,i might      
obtain a passport for ,england1 through 
exemption from military duty4 ,but the  
more certain brethren tried1 though they
 knew how to set about the matter1 and  
were also persons of rank1 the greater  
difficulty there appeared to be in      

obtaining my object2 so that in the     
middle of ,january #ahbi it seemed as if
 ,i must immediately become a soldier4  
,there was now but one more way untried1
 and it was at last resorted to4 ,a     
believing major1 who was on good terms  
with one of the chief generals1 proposed
 that ,i should actually offer myself   
for entering the army1 and that then ,i 
should be examined as to my bodily      
qualifications1 in the hope1 that1 as ,i
 was still in a very weak state of body1
 ,i should be found unfit for military  
service4 ,in that case it would belong  
to the chief general finally to settle  
the matter2 who1 being a godly man      
himself1 on the major's recommendation  
would1 no doubt1 hasten the decision1 on
 account of my desire to be a missionary
 to the ,jews4 ,at the same time it     
stood so1 that1 if ,i should be found   
fit for service1 ,i should have to enter
 the army immediately4  ,thus far the   
,lord had allowed things to go1 to show 
me1 it appears1 that all my friends     

could not procure me a passport till    
,his time was come4 ,but now it was     
come4 ,the ,king of kings had intended  
that ,i should go to ,england1 because  
,he would bless me there1 and make me a 
blessing1 though ,i was at that time1   
and am still most unworthy of it2 and1  
therefore1 though the ,king of ,prussia 
had not been pleased to make an         
exemption in my favour1 yet now all was 
made plain1 and that at a time when hope
 had almost been given up1 and when the 
last means had been resorted to4 ,i was 
examined1 and was declared to be unfit  
for military service4 ,with a medical   
certificate to this effect1 and a letter
 of recommendation from the major ,i    
went to this chief general1 who received
 me very kindly and who himself wrote   
instantaneously to a second military    
physician1 likewise to examine me at    
once4 ,this was done1 and it was by him 
confirmed that ,i was unfit4 ,now the   
chief general himself1 as his adjutants 
happened to be absent1 in order to      

hasten the matter1 wrote with his own   
hands the papers which were needed1 and 
,i got a complete dismissal1 and that   
for life1 from all military engagements4
 ,this was much more than ,i could have 
expected4 ,this military gentleman spoke
 to me in a very kind way1 and pointed  
out certain parts of the ,scriptures1   
which he in particular advised me to    
bring before the ,jews1 especially      
,romans xi4  ,on considering why the    
,lord delayed my obtaining this         
permission1 ,i find that one of the     
reasons may have been1 that ,i might    
both be profited myself by my stay in   
,berlin1 and that ,i also might be      
instrumental in benefiting others4 ,as  
to the first1 ,i would mention1 that ,i 
learned a lesson in ,berlin which ,i did
 not know before4 ,whilst ,i was at     
,halle1 ,i thought ,i should much enjoy 
being among so many christians as there 
are in ,berlin4 ,but when ,i was there  
,i found1 that enjoyment in the ,lord   
does not depend upon the multitude of   

believers1 by whom we are surrounded4   
,as to the second point1 perhaps the    
last day may show1 that the ,lord had   
some work for me in ,berlin3 for1 from  
the time of my coming until ,i left1 ,i 
preached three1 four1 or five times     
every week in the wards of a poorhouse1 
which was inhabited by about three      
hundred aged and infirm people4 ,i also 
preached once in a church1 and likewise 
visited one of the prisons several times
 on ,lord's days to converse with the   
prisoners about their souls1 where ,i   
was locked in by the keeper with the    
criminals in their cells4  ,on the whole
 my time in ,berlin was not lost2 and ,i
 was in a better state of heart than ,i 
had been for any length of time before1 
,i was not once overcome by my former   
outward besetting sins1 though ,i have  
nothing to boast of even as it regards  
that period2 and were only the sins of  
those days brought against me1 had ,i   
not the blood of ,jesus to plead1 ,i    
should be most miserable4 ,but ,i think 

it right to mention1 for the glory of   
,god1 as ,i have so freely spoken about 
my falls1 that whilst ,i was more than  
ever unobserved by others2 and whilst ,i
 was living in the midst of more gaiety 
and temptations than ever2 and had far  
more money than at any previous time of 
my life2 ,i was kept from things of     
which ,i had been habitually guilty in  
my unconverted days6--,my health was in 
a very weak state1 almost the whole time
 whilst ,i was staying in ,berlin1 and  
was in no degree better1 till1 on the   
advice of1 a believing medical          
professor1 ,i gave up all medicine4     
,having now without any further         
difficulty obtained my passport1 ,i left
 ,berlin on ,february #crd1 #ahbi1 for  
,london4 ,the ,lord gave me more grace  
on my way from ,berlin than on my way to
 it2 for my mouth was almost immediately
 opened to my fellow-travelers1 and the 
message of the ,gospel seemed to be     
listened to with interest1 particularly 
by one4 ,on ,february #eth ,i arrived at

 my father's house2 it was the place    
where ,i had lived as a boy1 and the    
scene of many of my sins1 my father     
having now returned to it after his     
retirement from office4 ,i came to it   
with peculiar feelings4 ,these feelings 
were not excited merely by the fact of  
my having been seven years absent from  
it1 but arose from the spiritual change 
,i had undergone since ,i last saw the  
place2 for ,i had never been at         
,heimersleben since my father fetched me
 from thence1 which was a few days after
 my imprisonment at ,wolfenbuettel had  
come to an end4 ,there were but three   
persons in the whole town with whom my  
soul had any fellowship4 ,one of them   
had spent all his money in coal mines1  
and was then earning his daily bread by 
thrashing corn4 ,as a boy ,i had in my  
heart laughed at him1 for he seemed so  
different from all other people4 ,now ,i
 sought him out1 having previously been 
informed that he was a believer1 to     
acknowledge him as such1 by having      

fellowship with him1 and attending1 a   
meeting in his house on the ,lord's day 
evening4 ,my soul was refreshed1 and his
 also4 ,such a spiritual feast1 as      
meeting with a brother1 was a rare thing
 to him4 ,may we believers who live in  
,great ,britain1 and especially those of
 us who are surrounded by many children 
of ,god1 seek for grace1 more highly to 
prize the blessings which1 we enjoy     
through fellowship with brethren6 ,this 
dear brother1 who had then been a       
believer for more than twenty years1 had
 only a few times heard the gospel      
preached during all that period4 ,what a
 wonderful thing that ,i1 one of the    
vilest of those brought up in that small
 town1 should have been so abundantly   
favoured1 as to have been brought to the
 knowledge of the truth1 whilst none of 
all my relations1 and scarcely one of   
those who grew up with me1 so far as it 
has come to my knowledge1 know the      
,lord6  ,i left my father's house on    
,february #ajth1 with the prospect of   

seeing him again in about a twelvemonth1
 as a missionary among the ,jews4 ,but  
how has the ,lord graciously altered    
matters6--,i was kindly lodged for a    
night at ,halberstadt by an aged        
brother1 and then proceeded towards     
,rotterdam1 by the way of ,munster4 ,at 
,munster ,i rested a few days1 and was  
very kindly received by several         
brethren4 ,they were officers in the    
army1 and two of them had been1 but a   
little while before this1 ,roman        
,catholics4 ,i lodged in the house of a 
beloved brother1 a tailor1 who likewise 
had been a ,roman ,catholic4  ,about    
,february #bbnd ,i arrived at           
,rotterdam4 ,i took lodgings in the     
house of a believer1 where two ,german  
brethren lodged1 whom ,i had known at   
,halle1 and who intended to go out as   
missionaries in connexion with the      
,dutch ,missionary ,society4 ,it was a  
peculiar feeling to me1 for the first   
time in my life to find myself among    
,christians of another nation1 to attend

 their family prayer1 hear them sing1 c4
 ,in spirit ,i had fellowship with them1
 though our communication was but       
broken1 as ,i understood but little of  
the ,dutch language4 ,here also ,i heard
 for the first time the preaching of the
 ,gospel in ,english1 of which ,i knew  
enough to understand a part of what was 
said4--,my going to ,england by the way 
of ,rotterdam was not the usual way2 but
 consulting with a brother in ,berlin1  
who had been twice in ,england1 ,i was  
told that this was the cheapest route4  
,my asking this brother1 to be profited 
by his experience1 would have been quite
 right1 had ,i1 besides this1 like      
,ezra1 sought of the ,lord the right    
way4 ,ezra viii4 #ba4 ,but ,i sought    
unto men only1 and not at all unto the  
,lord1 in this matter4 ,when ,i came to 
,rotterdam1 ,i found that no vessels    
went at that time from that port to     
,london1 on account of the ice having   
just broken up in the river1 and that it
 would be several weeks before the      

steamers would again begin to ply4 ,thus
 ,i had to wait nearly a month at       
,rotterdam1 and1 therefore1 not only    
needed much more time than ,i should    
have required to go by way of ,hamburgh1
 but also much more money4  ,on ,march  
#aith1 #ahbi1 ,i landed in ,london4 ,i  
now found myself1 in a great measure1 as
 it regards liberty1 brought back to the
 years when ,i was at school2 yea1      
almost all the time ,i had been at      
school1 and certainly for the last four 
years1 previous to my coming to         
,england1 ,i was not so much bound to   
time and order as ,i was in this        
seminary2 and had not there been a      
degree of grace in me1 yea1 so much as  
not to regard the liberty of the flesh1 
,i should now probably have given up all
 idea of being a missionary to the      
,jews4 ,but as ,i did not see that      
anything was expected from me which ,i  
could not conscientiously accede to1 ,i 
thought it right to submit myself1 for  
the ,lord's sake1 to all the regulations

 of the institution4   ,my brethren in  
the seminary1 most of them ,germans1 had
 instruction in ,hebrew1 ,latin1 ,greek1
 ,french1 ,german1 c41 scarcely any of  
them having had a classical education2  
,i read only ,hebrew1 and was exempted  
from all the rest4 ,i remember how ,i   
longed to be able to expound the        
,scriptures in ,english1 when ,i heard a
 ,german brother do so1 a few days after
 my arrival4 ,and ,i also remember what 
joy it gave me1 when a few weeks after1 
for the first time1 ,i spoke in ,english
 to a little boy1 whom ,i met alone in  
the fields1 about his soul1 thinking    
that he would bear with my broken       
,english4--,i now studied much1 about   
twelve hours a day1 chiefly ,hebrew2    
commenced ,chaldee2 perfected myself in 
reading the ,german-,jewish in ,rabbinic
 characters1 committed portions of the  
,hebrew ,old ,testament to memory1 c42  
and this ,i did with prayer1 often      
falling on my knees1 leaving my books   
for a little1 that ,i might seek the    

,lord's blessing1 and also1 that ,i     
might be kept from that spiritual       
deadness1 which is so frequently the    
result of much study4 ,i looked up to   
the ,lord even whilst turning over the  
leaves of my ,hebrew dictionary1 asking 
,his help1 that ,i might quickly find   
the words4 ,i made comparatively little 
progress in ,english2 for living with   
some of my countrymen1 ,i was           
continually led to converse in ,german4 
,my experience in this particular leads 
me to remark1 that1 should this fall    
into the hands of any who are desirous  
to labour as missionaries among a people
 whose language is not their own1 they  
should seek not merely to live among    
them1 for the sake of soon learning     
their language1 but also1 as much as    
possible1 to be separated from those who
 speak their own language2 for1 when1   
some months after1 ,i was in            
,devonshire1 completely separated from  
those who spoke ,german1 ,i daily made  
much progress1 whilst ,i made           

comparatively little in ,london4  ,soon 
after my arrival in ,england1 ,i heard  
one of the brethren in the seminary     
speak about a ,mr4 ,groves1 a dentist in
 ,exeter1 who1 for the ,lord's sake1 had
 given up his profession1 which brought 
him in about fifteen hundred pounds a   
year1 and who intended to go as a       
missionary to ,persia1 with his wife and
 children1 simply trusting in the ,lord 
for temporal supplies4 ,this made such  
an impression on me1 and delighted me   
so1 that ,i not only marked it down in  
my journal1 but also wrote about it to  
my ,german friends4  ,i came to ,england
 weak in body1 and in consequence of    
much study1 as ,i suppose1 ,i was taken 
ill on ,may #ae1 and was soon1 at least 
in my own estimation1 apparently1 beyond
 recovery4 ,the weaker ,i became in     
body1 the happier ,i was in spirit4     
,never in my whole life had ,i seen     
myself so vile1 so guilty1 so altogether
 what ,i ought not to have been1 as at  
this time4 ,it was as if every sin1 of  

which ,i had been guilty1 was brought to
 my remembrance2 but1 at the same time1 
,i could realize that all my sins were  
completely forgiven that ,i was washed  
and made clean1 completely clean1 in the
 blood of ,jesus4 ,the result of this   
was1 great peace4 ,i longed exceedingly 
to depart and to be with ,christ4 ,when 
my medical attendant came to see me1 my 
prayer was something like this3 ,lord1  
,thou knowest that he does not know what
 is for my real welfare1 therefore do   
,thou direct him4 ,when ,i took my      
medicine1 my hearty prayer each time was
 something like this3 ,lord1 ,thou      
knowest that this medicine is in itself 
nothing1 no more than as if ,i were to  
take a little water4 ,now please1 #j    
,lord1 to let it produce the effect     
which is for my real welfare1 and for   
,thy glory4 ,let me either be taken soon
 to ,thyself or let me be soon restored2
 let me be ill for a longer time1 and   
then taken to ,thyself1 or let me be ill
 for a longer time1 and then restored4  

#j ,lord1 do with me as seemeth ,thee   
best6 ,one sin in particular was brought
 to my mind1 which ,i never had seen    
before1 viz41 that whilst all my life1  
even in former sicknesses1 ,i had been  
blessed with uninterrupted refreshing   
sleep1 which now1 for some nights1 had  
almost entirely fled from my eyes1 ,i   
had never heartily thanked ,god for it4 
,after ,i had been ill about a          
fortnight1 my medical attendant         
unexpectedly pronounced me better4      
,this1 instead of giving me joy1 bowed  
me down1 so great was my desire to be   
with the ,lord2 though almost           
immediately afterwards grace was given  
me to submit myself to the will of ,god4
 ,after some days ,i was able to leave  
my room4 ,whilst recovering ,i still    
continued in a spiritual state of heart1
 desiring to depart and to be with      
,christ4 ,as ,i recovered but slowly1 my
 friends entreated me to go into the    
country for change of air2 but my heart 
was in such a happy and spiritual frame1

 that ,i did not like the thought of    
traveling and seeing places4 ,so far was
 ,i changed1 who once had been so       
passionately fond of traveling4 ,but as 
my friends continued to advise me to go 
into the country1 ,i thought at last    
that it might be the will of ,god that  
,i should do so1 and ,i prayed therefore
 thus to the ,lord3 ,lord1 ,i will      
gladly submit myself to ,thy will1 and  
go if ,thou wilt have me to go4 ,and now
 let me know ,thy will by the answer of 
my medical attendant4 ,if1 in reply to  
my question1 he says it would be very   
good for me1 ,i will go2 but if he says 
it is of no great importance1 then ,i   
will stay4 ,when ,i asked him1 he said  
that it was the best thing ,i could do4 
,i was then enabled willingly to submit1
 and accordingly went to ,teignmouth4   
,it was there that ,i became acquainted 
with my beloved brother1 friend1 and    
fellow-labourer1 ,henry ,craik4  ,a few 
days after my arrival at ,teignmouth1   
the chapel1 called ,ebenezer1 was       

reopened1 and ,i attended the opening4  
,i was much impressed by one of those   
who preached on the occasion4 ,for      
though ,i did not like all he said1 yet 
,i saw a gravity and solemnity in him   
different from the rest4 ,after he had  
preached1 ,i had a great desire to know 
more of him2 and being invited by two   
brethren of ,exmouth1 in whose house he 
was staying1 to spend some time with    
them1 ,i had an opportunity of living   
ten days with him under the same roof4  
,through the instrumentality of this    
brother the ,lord bestowed a great      
blessing upon me1 for which ,i shall    
have cause to thank ,him throughout     
eternity4  ,i will mention some points  
which ,god then began to show me4  #a4  
,that the word of ,god alone is our     
standard of judgment in spiritual       
things2 that it can be explained only by
 the ,holy ,spirit2 and that in our day1
 as well as in former times1 ,he is the 
teacher of ,his people4 ,the office of  
the ,holy ,spirit ,i had not            

experimentally understood before that   
time4 ,indeed1 of the office of each of 
the blessed persons1 in what is commonly
 called the ,trinity1 ,i had no         
experimental apprehension4 ,i had not   
before seen from the ,scriptures that   
the ,father chose us before the         
foundation of the world2 that in ,him   
that wonderful plan of our redemption   
originated1 and that ,he also appointed 
all the means by which it was to be     
brought about4 ,further1 that the ,son1 
to save us1 had fulfilled the law1 to   
satisfy its demands1 and with it also   
the holiness of ,god2 that ,he had borne
 the punishment due to our sins1 and had
 thus satisfied the justice of ,god4    
,and further1 that the ,holy ,spirit    
alone can teach us about our state by   
nature1 show us the need of a ,saviour1 
enable us to believe in ,christ1 explain
 to us the ,scriptures1 help us in      
preaching1 c4 ,it was my beginning to   
understand this latter point in         
particular1 which had a great effect on 

me2 for the ,lord enabled me to put it  
to the test of experience1 by laying    
aside commentaries1 and almost every    
other book1 and simply reading the word 
of ,god and studying it4 ,the result of 
this was1 that the first evening that ,i
 shut myself into my room1 to give      
myself to prayer and meditation over the
 ,scriptures1 ,i learned more in a few  
hours than ,i had done during a period  
of several months previously4 ,but the  
particular difference was1 that ,i      
received real strength for my soul in   
doing so4 ,i now began to try by the    
test of the ,scriptures the things which
 ,i had learned and seen1 and found that
 only those principles1 which stood the 
test1 were really of value4  #b4 ,before
 this period ,i had been much opposed to
 the doctrines of election1 particular  
redemption1 and final persevering grace2
 so much so that1 a few days after my   
arrival at ,teignmouth1 ,i called       
election a devilish doctrine4 ,i did not
 believe that ,i had brought myself to  

the ,lord1 for that was too manifestly  
false2 but yet ,i held1 that ,i might   
have resisted finally4 ,and further1 ,i 
knew nothing about the choice of ,god's 
people1 and did not believe that the    
child of ,god1 when once made so1 was   
safe for ever4 ,in my fleshly mind ,i   
had repeatedly said1 ,if once ,i could  
prove that ,i am a child of ,god for    
ever1 ,i might go back into the world   
for a year or two1 and then return to   
the ,lord1 and at last be saved4 ,but   
now ,i was brought to examine these     
precious truths by the word of ,god4    
,being made willing to have no glory of 
my own in the conversion of sinners1 but
 to consider myself merely as an        
instrument2 and being made willing to   
receive what the ,scriptures said2 ,i   
went to the ,word1 reading the ,new     
,testament from the beginning1 with a   
particular reference to these truths4   
,to my great astonishment ,i found that 
the passages which speak decidedly for  
election and persevering grace1 were    

about four times as many as those which 
speak apparently against these truths2  
and even those few1 shortly after1 when 
,i had examined and understood them1    
served to confirm me in the above       
doctrines4 ,as to the effect which my   
belief in these doctrines had on me1 ,i 
am constrained to state1 for ,god's     
glory1 that though ,i am still          
exceedingly weak1 and by no means so    
dead to the lusts of the flesh1 and the 
lust of the eyes1 and the pride of life1
 as ,i might and as ,i ought to be1 yet1
 by the grace of ,god1 ,i have walked   
more closely with ,him since that       
period4 ,my life has not been so        
variable1 and ,i may say that ,i have   
lived much more for ,god than before4   
,and for this have ,i been strengthened 
by the ,lord1 in a great measure1       
through the instrumentality of these    
truths4 ,for in the time of temptation1 
,i have been repeatedly led to say3     
,should ,i thus sin8 ,i should only     
bring misery into my soul for a time1   

and dishonour ,god2 for1 being a son of 
,god for ever1 ,i should have to be     
brought back again1 though it might be  
in the way of severe chastisement4      
,thus1 ,i say1 the electing love of ,god
 in ,christ 7when ,i have been able to  
realize it7 has often been the means of 
producing holiness1 instead of leading  
me into sin4 ,it is only the notional   
apprehension of such truths1 the want of
 having them in the heart1 whilst they  
are in the head1 which is dangerous4    
#c4 ,another truth1 into which1 in a    
measure1 ,i was led during my stay in   
,devonshire1 respected the ,lord's      
coming4 ,my views concerning this point1
 up to that time1 had been completely   
vague and unscriptural4 ,i had believed 
what others told me1 without trying it  
by the ,word4 ,i thought that things    
were getting better and better1 and that
 soon the whole world would be          
converted4 ,but now ,i found in the     
,word1 that we have not the least       
,scriptural warrant to look for the     

conversion of the world before the      
return of our ,lord4 ,i found in the    
,scriptures1 that that which will usher 
in the glory of the church1 and         
uninterrupted joy to the saints1 is the 
return of the ,lord ,jesus1 and that1   
till then1 things will be more or less  
in confusion4 ,i found in the ,word1    
that the return of ,jesus1 and not      
death1 was the hope of the apostolic    
,christians2 and that it became me1     
therefore1 to look for ,his appearing4  
,and this truth entered so into my      
heart1 that1 though ,i went into        
,devonshire exceedingly weak1 scarcely  
expecting that ,i should return again to
 ,london1 yet ,i was immediately1 on    
seeing the truth1 brought off from      
looking for death1 and was made to look 
for the return of the ,lord4 ,having    
seen this truth1 the ,lord also         
graciously enabled me to apply it1 in   
some measure at least1 to my own heart1 
and to put the solemn question to       
myself--,what may ,i do for the ,lord1  

before ,he returns1 as ,he may soon     
come8  #d4 ,in addition to these truths1
 it pleased the ,lord to lead me to see 
a higher standard of devotedness than ,i
 had seen before4 ,he led me1 in a      
measure1 to see what is my true glory in
 this world1 even to be despised1 and to
 be poor and mean with ,christ4 ,i saw  
then1 in a measure1 though ,i have seen 
it more fully since1 that it ill becomes
 the servant to seek to be rich1 and    
great1 and honoured in that world1 where
 his ,lord was poor1 and mean1 and      
despised4  ,i do not mean to say that   
all that which ,i believe at present    
concerning these truths1 and those      
which1 in connexion with them1 the ,lord
 has shown me since ,august #ahbi1 were 
apprehended all at once2 and much less  
did ,i see them all at once with the    
same clearness1 as1 by the grace of     
,god1 ,i do now2 yet my stay in         
,devonshire was a most profitable time  
to my soul4 ,my prayer had been1 before 
,i left ,london1 that the ,lord would be

 pleased to bless my journey to the     
benefit of my body and soul4 ,this      
prayer was answered in both respects2   
for in the beginning of ,september ,i   
returned to ,london much better in body2
 and1 as to my soul1 the change was so  
great1 that it was like a second        
conversion4  ,after my return to        
,london1 ,i sought to benefit my        
brethren in the seminary1 and the means 
which ,i used were these4 ,i proposed to
 them to meet together every morning    
from six to eight for prayer and reading
 the ,scriptures1 and that then each of 
us should give out what he might        
consider the ,lord had shown him to be  
the meaning of the portion read4 ,one   
brother in particular was brought into  
the same state as myself2 and others1 ,i
 trust1 were more or less benefited4    
,several times1 when ,i went to my room 
after family prayer in the evening1 ,i  
found communion with ,god so sweet1 that
 ,i continued in prayer till after      
twelve1 and then1 being full of joy1    

went into the room of the brother just  
referred to2 and1 finding him also in a 
similar frame of heart1 we continued    
praying until one or two and even then  
,i was a few times so full1 of joy1 that
 ,i could scarcely sleep1 and at six in 
the morning again called the brethren   
together for prayer4  ,all this moreover
 did not leave me idle1 as it regards   
actual engagements in the ,lord's work1 
as ,i will now show4 ,after ,i had been 
for about ten days in ,london1 and had  
been confined to the house on account of
 my studies1 my health began again to   
decline2 and ,i saw that it would not be
 well1 my poor body being only like a   
wreck or brand brought out of the       
devil's service1 to spend my little     
remaining strength in study1 but that ,i
 now ought to set about actual          
engagements in the ,lord's work1        
particularly as ,he had now given me    
more light about ,his truth1 and also a 
heart to serve ,him4 ,i consequently    
wrote to the committee of the ,society1 

requesting them to send me out at once1 
as they had now had an opportunity of   
knowing me2 and1 that they might do so  
with more confidence1 to send me as a   
fellow-labourer to an experienced       
brother4 ,however ,i received no answer4
  ,after having waited about five or six
 weeks1 in the meantime seeking in one  
way or other to labour for the ,lord1 it
 struck me that ,i was wrong and acting 
unscripturally1 in waiting for the      
appointment to missionary work from my  
fellow-men2 but that1 considering myself
 called by the ,lord to preach the      
gospel1 ,i ought to begin at once to    
labour among the ,jews in ,london1      
whether ,i had the title of missionary  
or not4 ,in consequence of this ,i      
distributed tracts among the ,jews1 with
 my name and residence written on them1 
thus inviting them to conversation about
 the things of ,god2 preached to them in
 those places where they most numerously
 collect together2 read the ,scriptures 
regularly with about fifty ,jewish boys2

 and became a teacher in a ,sunday      
school4 ,in this work ,i had much       
enjoyment and the honour of being       
reproached and ill-treated for the name 
of ,jesus4 ,but the ,lord gave me grace1
 never to be kept from the work by any  
danger1 or the prospect of any          
suffering4  ,my light increased more and
 more during the months of ,september1  
,october1 and ,november4 ,at the end of 
,november it became a point of solemn   
consideration with me1 whether ,i could 
remain connected with the ,society in   
the usual way4 ,my chief objections were
 these3 #a4 ,if ,i were sent out by the 
,society1 it was more than probable1    
yea1 almost needful1 if ,i were to leave
 ,england1 that ,i should labour on the 
,continent1 as ,i was unfit to be sent  
to eastern countries on account of my   
health1 which would probably have       
suffered1 both on account of the        
climate1 and of my having to learn other
 languages4 ,now1 if ,i did go to the   
,continent1 it was evident1 that without

 ordination ,i could not have any       
extensive field of usefulness1 as       
unordained ministers are generally      
prevented from labouring freely there2  
but ,i could not conscientiously submit 
to be ordained by unconverted men1      
professing to have power to set me apart
 for the ministry1 or to communicate    
something to me for this work which they
 do not possess themselves4 ,besides    
this1 ,i had other objections to being  
connected with any state church or      
national religious establishment1 which 
arose from the increased light which ,i 
had obtained through the reception of   
this truth1 that the word of ,god is our
 only standard1 and the ,holy ,spirit   
our only teacher4 ,for as ,i now began  
to compare what ,i knew of the          
establishment in ,england and those on  
the ,continent1 with this only true     
standard1 the word of ,god1 ,i found    
that all establishments1 even because   
they are establishments1 i4e4 the world 
and the church mixed up together1 not   

only contain in them the principles     
which necessarily must lead to departure
 from the word of ,god2 but also1 as    
long as they remain establishments1     
entirely preclude the acting throughout 
according to the ,holy                  
,scriptures4--,then again1 if ,i were to
 stay in ,england1 the ,society would   
not allow me to preach in any place     
indiscriminately1 where the ,lord might 
open a door for me2 and to the          
ordination of ,english bishops ,i had   
still greater objections1 than to the   
ordination of a ,prussian ,consistory4  
#b4 ,i further had a conscientious      
objection against being led and directed
 by men in my missionary labours4 ,as a 
servant of ,christ it appeared to me1 ,i
 ought to be guided by the ,spirit1 and 
not by men1 as to time and place2 and   
this ,i would say1 with all deference to
 others1 who may be much more taught and
 much more spiritually minded than      
myself4 ,a servant of ,christ has but   
one ,master4 #c4 ,i had love for the    

,jews1 and ,i had been enabled to give  
proofs of it2 yet ,i could not          
conscientiously say1 as the committee   
would expect from me1 that ,i would     
spend the greater part of my time only  
among them4 ,for the scriptural plan    
seemed to me1 that1 in coming to a      
place1 ,i should seek out the ,jews1 and
 commence my labour particularly among  
them2 but that1 if they rejected the    
gospel1 ,i should go to the nominal     
,christians--,the more ,i weighed these 
points1 the more it appeared to me that 
,i should be acting hypocritically1 were
 ,i to suffer them to remain in my mind1
 without making them known to the       
committee4  ,the question that next     
occurred to me was1 how ,i ought to act 
if not sent out by the ,society4 ,with  
my views ,i could not return to         
,prussia2 for ,i must either refrain    
from preaching1 or imprisonment would be
 the result4 ,the only plan that        
presented itself to me was1 that ,i     
should go from place to place throughout

 ,england1 as the ,lord might direct me1
 and give me opportunity1 preaching     
wherever ,i went1 both among ,jews and  
nominal ,christians4 ,to this mode of   
service ,i was especially stirred up    
through the recently received truth of  
the ,lord's second coming1 having it    
impressed upon my heart to seek to warn 
sinners1 and to stir up the saints2 as  
,he might soon come4 ,at the same time  
it appeared to me well1 that ,i should  
do this in connexion with the ,society  
for promoting ,christianity among the   
,jews1 serving them without any salary1 
provided they would accept me on these  
conditions4 ,an objection which came to 
my mind against taking any step which   
might lead to the dissolution of my     
connexion with the ,society1 namely1    
that ,i had been some expense to it1 and
 that thus ,i should appear ungrateful1 
and the money would seem to have been   
thrown away1 was easily removed in this 
way3  #a4 ,when ,i engaged with the     
,society1 ,i did it according to the    

light ,i then had4 #b4 ,i have but one  
,master2 ,his is the money1 and to ,him 
,i have to give an account4 #c4 ,though 
,i have nothing to boast of1 but much   
reason to be ashamed before ,god on     
account of my lack of service2 yet1     
speaking after the manner of men1 in    
some measure ,i did work1 not only in   
the ,lord's service1 but even in that   
particular line for which the money had 
been put into the hands of the          
committee4  ,there remained now only one
 point more to be settled3  ,how ,i     
should do for the future as it regarded 
the supply of my temporal wants1 which  
naturally would have been a great       
obstacle1 especially as ,i was not      
merely a foreigner1 but spoke so little 
,english1 that whilst ,i was greatly    
assisted in expounding the ,scriptures1 
it was with difficulty ,i could converse
 about common things4 ,on this point1   
however1 ,i had no anxiety2 for ,i      
considered1 that1 as long as ,i really  
sought to serve the ,lord1 that is1 as  

long as ,i sought the kingdom of ,god   
and ,his righteousness1 these my        
temporal supplies would be added to me4 
,the ,lord most mercifully enabled me to
 take the promises of ,his word1 and    
rest upon them1 and such as ,matthew    
vii4 #g1 #h1 ,john xiv4 #ac1 #ad1       
,matthew vi4 #be-cd1 were the stay of my
 soul concerning this point4 ,in        
addition to this1 the example of brother
 ,groves1 the dentist before alluded to1
 who gave up his profession1 and went   
out as a missionary1 was a great        
encouragement to me4 ,for the news1     
which by this time had arrived1 of how  
the ,lord had aided him on his way to   
,petersburg1 and at ,petersburg1        
strengthened my faith4  ,at last1 on    
,december #ab1 #ahbi1 ,i came to the    
conclusion to dissolve my connexion with
 the ,society1 if they would not accept 
my services under the above conditions1 
and to go throughout the country        
preaching1 7being particularly          
constrained to do so from a desire to   

serve the ,lord as much as in me lay1   
,,before ,,his ,,return71 and to trust  
in ,him for the supply of my temporal   
wants4 ,yet at the same time it appeared
 well to me to wait a month longer1 and 
to consider the matter still further1   
before ,i wrote to the committee1 that  
,i might be sure ,i had weighed it      
fully4  ,on ,december #bdth ,i went to  
the ,church ,missionary ,institution at 
,islington1 in the hope of benefiting   
the students there1 if it were the      
,lord's will4 ,i returned very happy1 as
 ,i almost invariably was at that time1 
and went to bed full of joy4 ,next      
morning1 7being that of ,christmas day71
 ,i awoke in a very different state of  
heart from what ,i had experienced for  
many weeks past4 ,i had no enjoyment1   
and felt cold and lifeless in prayer4   
,at our usual morning meeting1 however1 
one of the brethren exhorted me to      
continue to pray1 saying that the ,lord 
surely would again smile on me1 though  
now for a season1 for wise purposes1 ,he

 seemed to have withdrawn ,himself4 ,i  
did so4 ,at the ,lord's table1 in the   
morning1 a measure of enjoyment         
returned4 ,afterwards ,i dined in a     
family1 in company with the brother just
 referred to4 ,my former enjoyment      
gradually returned4 ,towards evening the
 ,lord gave me an opportunity of        
speaking about ,his return1 and ,i had  
great enjoyment in doing so4 ,at eight  
o'clock ,i was asked to expound at      
family prayer1 and was much assisted by 
the ,lord4 ,about half an hour after the
 exposition was over1 ,i was requested  
to come out of the room to see one of   
the servants1 and the mother of another 
of the servants1 who had been present at
 family prayer4 ,i found them in tears1 
and both deeply impressed and under     
concern about their souls4 ,i then went 
home1 at least as happy as on the       
previous evening4 ,i have related this  
circumstance1 because ,i am aware that  
it is a common temptation of ,satan to  
make us give up the reading of the ,word

 and prayer when our enjoyment is gone2 
as if it were of no use to read the     
,scriptures when we do not enjoy them1  
and as if it were of no use to pray when
 we have no spirit of prayer2 whilst the
 truth is1 in order to enjoy the ,word1 
we ought to continue to read it1 and the
 way to obtain a spirit of prayer1 is1  
to continue praying2 for the less we    
read the word of ,god1 the less we      
desire to read it1 and the less we pray1
 the less we desire to pray4  ,about the
 beginning of the next year my fellow   
students had a fortnight's vacation1 and
 as with them ,i had conformed myself to
 the order of the ,institution1 ,i felt 
that ,i might also partake of their     
privileges2 not indeed to please the    
flesh1 but to serve the ,lord4 ,on      
,december #cjth1 ,i therefore left      
,london for ,exmouth1 where ,i intended 
to spend my vacation in the house of my 
,christian friends1 who had kindly      
lodged me the summer before1 that ,i    
might preach there during this          

fortnight1 and still more fully weigh   
the matter respecting my proposal to    
time ,society4 ,i arrived at ,exmouth on
 ,december #cast1 at six in the evening1
 an hour before the commencement of a   
prayer-meeting at ,ebenezer ,chapel4 ,my
 heart was burning with a desire to tell
 of the ,lord's goodness to my soul1 and
 to speak forth what ,i considered might
 not be known to most with whom ,i met4 
,being1 however1 not called on1 either  
to speak or pray1 ,i was silent4 ,the   
next morning ,i spoke on the difference 
between being a ,christian and a happy  
,christian1 and showed1 whence it       
generally comes1 that we rejoice so     
little in the ,lord4 ,this my first     
testimony was blessed to many believers1
 that ,god1 as it appears1 might show me
 that ,he was with me4 ,among others it 
proved a blessing to a ,christian       
female1 who had been for ten years in   
bondage1 and who1 in the providence of  
,god1 had been brought from ,exeter to  
be present that morning4 ,this she told 

me many months after1 when ,i met her on
 a journey4  ,at the request of several 
believers ,i spoke again in the         
afternoon1 and also proposed a meeting  
in the chapel every morning at ten1 to  
expound the epistle to the ,romans4 ,i  
had also most days a meeting in a room  
with several ladies1 for reading the    
,scriptures with them4 ,this ,i did that
 ,i might make the best of my fortnight4
 ,the second day after my arrival1 a    
brother said to me3 ,i have been praying
 for this month past that the ,lord     
would do something for ,lympstone1 a    
large parish where there is little      
spiritual light4 ,there is a ,wesleyan  
chapel1 and ,i doubt not you would be   
allowed to preach there4 ,being ready to
 speak of ,jesus wherever the ,lord     
might open a door1 yet so1 that ,i could
 be faithful to the truths which he had 
been pleased to teach me1 ,i went1 and  
easily obtained liberty to preach twice 
on the next day1 being the ,lord's day4 
,besides this ,i preached in another    

village near ,exmouth2 so that ,i spoke 
once1 twice1 or three times in public or
 private meetings every day for the     
first ten or twelve days1 and that with 
great enjoyment to my own soul4  ,during
 the first days of ,january1 #ahcj1     
whilst at ,exmouth1 it became more and  
more clear to me1 that ,i could not be  
connected with the ,society under the   
usual conditions2 and as ,i had an      
abundance of work where ,i was1 and     
little money to spend in traveling 7for 
all ,i possessed was about five pounds71
 it appeared best to me to write at once
 to the committee1 that1 whilst they    
were coming to a decision respecting me1
 ,i might continue to preach4 ,i        
therefore wrote to them1 stating what   
had been my views before ,i became      
acquainted with them1 and what they were
 now4 ,i also stated my difficulty in   
remaining1 connected with them on the   
usual terms1 as stated in substance     
above2 and then concluded1 that as1     
however1 ,i owed them much1 as having   

been instrumental in bringing me to     
,england1 where the ,lord had blessed me
 so abundantly3 and as ,i1 also1 should 
like to obtain from them the ,hebrew    
,scriptures and tracts for the ,jews3 ,i
 would gladly serve them without any    
salary1 if they would allow me to labour
 in regard to time and place as the     
,lord might direct me4 ,some time after 
,i received a very kind private letter  
from one of the secretaries1 who always 
had been very kind to me1 together with 
the following official communication    
from the committee4  ,london ,society   
for promoting ,christianity amongst the 
,jews4  ,at a ,meeting of the           
,missionary ,sub-,committee1 held       
,january #bg1 #ahcj1 ,society ,house1   
#aj1 ,wardrobe ,place1 ,doctors'        
,commons1 a ,letter was read from ,mr4  
,g4 ,f4 ,mueller4  ,resolved1 ,that ,mr4
 ,mueller be informed1 that while the   
committee cordially rejoice in any real 
progress in knowledge and grace which he
 may have made under the teaching of the

 ,holy ,spirit1 they1 nevertheless1     
consider it inexpedient for any society 
to employ those who are unwilling to    
submit themselves to their guidance with
 respect to missionary operations2 and  
that while1 therefore1 ,mr4 ,mueller    
holds his present opinions on that      
point1 the committee cannot consider him
 as a missionary student2 but should    
more mature reflection cause him to     
alter that opinion1 they will readily   
enter into further communication with   
him4  ,thus my connexion with the       
,society was entirely dissolved4        
,fifty-two years have passed away since1
 and ,i never have1 even for one single 
moment1 regretted the step ,i took1 but 
have to be sorry that ,i have been so   
little grateful for the ,lord's goodness
 to me in that matter4 ,the following   
part of the ,narrative also will prove  
to the enlightened reader1 how ,god     
blessed my acting out the light ,he had 
been pleased to give me4 ,but ,i cannot 
leave this subject1 without adding1 that

 it is far from my intention to throw   
any blame upon the ,society4 ,i have no 
wish to do so3 nay1 ,i confess1 were the
 last-mentioned circumstances not so    
intimately connected with my being in   
,england1 ,i would rather have left out 
the matter altogether4 ,but being under 
the necessity of saying something about 
my connexion with it1 it appeared best  
to me to relate the circumstances just  
as they were4 ,yet ,i do testify that ,i
 have not done it in the least for the  
sake of injuring the ,society2 for ,i   
have received much kindness from some of
 those connected with it1 particularly  
from two worthy men1 then taking a      
prominent part in managing its affairs4 
,if ,i be judged differently1 ,i can    
only say1 ,judge nothing before the     
time1 until the ,lord come4  ,after ,i  
had preached about three weeks at       
,exmouth and its neighbourhood1 ,i went 
to ,teignmouth1 with the intention of   
staying there ten days1 to preach the   
,word among the brethren with whom ,i   

had become acquainted during the        
previous summer1 and thus to tell them  
of the ,lord's goodness to me4 ,one of  
the brethren said almost immediately on 
my arrival at ,teignmouth1 ,i wish you  
would become our minister1 as the       
present one is going to leave us4 ,my   
answer was1 ,i do not intend to be      
stationary in any place1 but to go      
through the country1 preaching the ,word
 as the ,lord may direct me4 ,in the    
evening1 ,monday1 ,i preached for       
brother ,craik1 at ,shaldon1 in the     
presence of three ministers1 none of    
whom liked the sermon2 yet it pleased   
,god1 through it1 to bring to the       
knowledge of ,his dear ,son1 a young    
woman who had been servant to one of    
these ministers1 and who had heard her  
master preach many times4 ,how          
differently does the ,lord judge from   
man6 ,here was a particular opportunity 
for the ,lord to get glory to ,himself4 
,a foreigner was the preacher1 with     
great natural obstacles in the way1 for 

he was not able to speak ,english with  
fluency2 but he had a desire to serve   
,god1 and was by this time also brought 
into such a state of heart as to desire 
that ,god alone should have the glory1  
if any good were done through his       
instrumentality4 ,how often has it      
struck me1 both at that time and since1 
that ,his strength was made perfect in  
my weakness4  ,on ,tuesday evening ,i   
preached at ,ebenezer ,chapel1          
,teignmouth1 the same chapel at the     
opening of which ,i became acquainted   
with the brother1 whom the ,lord had    
afterwards used as an instrument of     
benefiting me so much4 ,my preaching was
 also disliked there by many of the     
hearers2 but the ,lord opened the hearts
 of a few to receive the truth1 and     
another young woman was brought to the  
,lord through the instrumentality of the
 word then preached4 ,on ,wednesday ,i  
preached again in the same chapel1 and  
the word was disliked still1 perhaps    
more1 though the few1 who received the  

truth in the love of it1 increased in   
number4 ,on ,thursday ,i preached again 
at ,shaldon1 and on ,friday at          
,teignmouth4 ,the effect was the same2  
dislike on the one side1 and joy and    
delight in the truth on the other4 ,by  
this time ,i began to reflect about the 
cause of this opposition2 for the same  
brethren who had treated me with much   
kindness the summer previous1 when ,i   
was less spiritually minded1 and        
understood much less of the truth1 now  
seemed to oppose me1 and ,i could not   
explain it in any other way than this1  
that the ,lord intended to work through 
my instrumentality at ,teignmouth1 and  
that therefore ,satan1 fearing this1    
sought to raise opposition against me4  
,on the ,lord's day ,i dined with a     
brother1 whose heart the ,lord had      
opened to receive me as a servant of    
,christ4 ,after dinner ,i talked to a   
young woman1 his servant1 at the request
 of her sister1 who on the ,tuesday     
previous had been convinced of sin1 and 

on the ,friday brought to enjoy peace in
 the ,lord4 ,this young woman also was1 
through the instrumentality of this     
conversation1 brought to see her sinful 
state1 though she could not rejoice in  
the ,lord until about seven months      
after4 ,how differently the ,lord dealt 
with her sister1 and yet the work of    
grace was as real in the one as in the  
other1 as ,i had full opportunity of    
seeing afterwards6 ,on this same ,lord's
 day ,i preached twice at ,teignmouth1  
and once at ,shaldon2 for so precious   
did every opportunity seem to me1 and so
 powerfully did ,i feel the importance  
of those precious truths1 which ,i had  
so recently been led to see1 that ,i    
longed to be instrumental in            
communicating them to others4  ,by this 
time the request1 that ,i might stay at 
,teignmouth1 and be the minister of the 
above chapel1 had been repeatedly       
expressed by an increasing number of the
 brethren2 but others were decidedly    
against my remaining there4 ,this       

opposition was instrumental in settling 
it in my mind that ,i should stay for   
awhile1 at least until ,i was formally  
rejected4 ,in consequence of this       
conclusion ,i took the following step1  
which1 it may be1 ,i should not repeat  
under similar circumstances1 but which  
was certainly taken in love to those who
 were concerned in the matter1 and for  
the glory of ,god1 as far as ,i then had
 light4  ,on the ,tuesday following1    
after preaching1 ,i told the brethren   
how1 in the providence of ,god1 ,i had  
been brought to them without the least  
intention of staying among them1 but    
that1 on finding them without a         
minister1 ,i had been led to see it to  
be the will of ,god to remain with them4
 ,i also told them1 as far as ,i        
remember1 that ,i was aware of the      
opposition of some1 but that ,i         
nevertheless intended to preach to them 
till they rejected me2 and if they      
should say1 ,i might preach1 but they   
would give me no salary1 that would make

 no difference on my part1 as ,i did not
 preach for the sake of money2 but ,i   
told them1 at the same time1 that it was
 an honour1 to be allowed to supply the 
temporal wants of any of the servants of
 ,christ4 ,the latter point ,i added1 as
 it seemed right to me1 to give out the 
whole counsel of ,god1 as far as ,i knew
 it4 ,on the next day1 ,wednesday1 ,i   
left1 and having preached in two or     
three places near ,exmouth1 and taken   
leave of my friends there1 ,i returned  
to ,teignmouth4  ,here ,i preached again
 three times on the ,lord's day1 none   
saying we wish you not to preach1 though
 many of the hearers did not hear with  
enjoyment4 ,some of them left1 and never
 returned2 some left1 but returned after
 awhile4 ,others came to the chapel1 who
 had not been in the habit of attending 
there previous to my coming4 ,there was 
sufficient proof that the work of ,god  
was going on1 for there were those who  
were glad to hear what ,i preached1     
overlooking the infirmities of the      

foreigner1 delighting in the food for   
their souls1 without caring much about  
the form in which the truth was set     
before them2 and these were not less    
spiritual than the rest3 and there were 
those who objected decidedly2 some1     
however1 manifesting merely the weakness
 of brethren1 and others the bitterness 
of the opposers of the cross4 ,there    
was1 in addition to this1 a great stir1 
a spirit of inquiry1 and a searching of 
the ,scriptures1 whether these things   
were so4 ,and what is more than all1    
,god set ,his seal upon the work1 in    
converting sinners4 ,twelve weeks ,i    
stood in this same position1 whilst the 
,lord graciously supplied my temporal   
wants1 through two brethren1 unasked    
for4 ,after this time1 the whole little 
church1 eighteen in number1 unanimously 
gave me an invitation to become their   
pastor4 ,my answer to them was1 that    
their invitation did not show me more   
than ,i had seen before1 that it was the
 will of ,god that ,i should remain with

 them1 yet that for their sakes ,i could
 not but rejoice in this invitation1 as 
it was a proof to me that ,god had      
blessed them through my instrumentality1
 in making them thus of one mind4 ,i    
also expressly stated to the brethren1  
that ,i should only stay so long with   
them1 as ,i saw it clearly to be the    
will of the ,lord2 for ,i had not given 
up my intention of going from place to  
place1 if the ,lord would allow me to do
 so4 ,the brethren1 at the same time1   
now offered to supply my temporal wants1
 by giving me ,l#ee4 a year1 which sum  
was afterwards somewhat increased1 on   
account of the increase of the church4  
,i now had ,teignmouth for my residence1
 but ,i did not confine my labours to   
this place2 for ,i preached regularly   
once a week in ,exeter1 once a fortnight
 at ,topsham1 sometimes at ,shaldon1    
often at ,exmouth1 sometimes in the     
above-mentioned villages near ,exmouth1 
regularly once a week at                
,bishopsteignton1 where a part of the   

church lived1 and afterwards repeatedly 
at ,chudleigh1 ,collumpton1 ,newton     
,bushel1 and elsewhere4  ,that which ,i 
now considered the best mode of         
preparation for the public ministry of  
the ,word1 no longer adopted from       
necessity1 on account of want of time1  
but from deep conviction1 and from the  
experience of ,god's blessing upon it1  
both as it regards my own enjoyment1 the
 benefit of the saints1 and the         
conversion of sinners1 is as            
follows3--#a4 ,i do not presume to know 
myself what is best for the hearers1 and
 ,i therefore ask the ,lord in the first
 place1 that ,he would graciously be    
pleased to teach me on what subject ,i  
shall speak1 or what portion of ,his    
word ,i shall expound4 ,now sometimes it
 happens1 that previous to my asking    
,him1 a subject or passage has been in  
my mind1 on which it has appeared well  
for me to speak4 ,in that case ,i ask   
the ,lord1 whether ,i should speak on   
this subject or passage4 ,if1 after     

prayer1 ,i feel persuaded that ,i should
 ,i fix upon it1 yet so1 that ,i would  
desire to leave myself open to the ,lord
 to change it1 if ,he please4           
,frequently1 however1 it occurs1 that ,i
 have no text or subject in my mind1    
before ,i give myself to prayer for the 
sake of ascertaining the ,lord's will   
concerning it4 ,in this case ,i wait    
some time on my knees for an answer1    
trying to listen to the voice of the    
,spirit to direct me4 ,if then a passage
 or subject1 whilst ,i am on my knees1  
or after ,i have finished praying for a 
text1 is brought to my mind1 ,i again   
ask the ,lord1 and that sometimes       
repeatedly1 especially if1 humanly      
speaking1 the subject or text should be 
a peculiar one1 whether it be ,his will 
that ,i should speak on such a subject  
or passage4 ,if after prayer my mind is 
peaceful about it1 ,i take this to be   
the text1 but still desire to leave     
myself open to the ,lord for direction1 
should ,he please to alter it1 or should

 ,i have been mistaken4 ,frequently     
also1 in the third place1 it happens1   
that ,i not only have no text nor       
subject on my mind previous to my       
praying for guidance in this matter1 but
 also ,i do not obtain one after once1  
or twice1 or more times praying about   
it4 ,i used formerly at times to be much
 perplexed1 when this was the case1 but 
for more than forty-five years it has   
pleased the ,lord1 in general at least1 
to keep me in peace about it4 ,what ,i  
do is1 to go on with my regular reading 
of the ,scriptures1 where ,i left off   
the last time1 praying 7whilst ,i read7 
for a text1 now and then also laying    
aside my bible for prayer1 till ,i get  
one4 ,thus it has happened1 that ,i have
 had to read five1 ten2 yea twenty      
chapters1 before it has pleased the     
,lord to give me a text3 yea1 many times
 ,i have even had to go to the place of 
meeting without one1 and obtained it    
perhaps only a few minutes before ,i was
 going to speak2 but ,i have never      

lacked the ,lord's assistance at the    
time of preaching1 provided ,i had      
earnestly sought it in private4 ,the    
preacher cannot know the particular     
state of the various individuals who    
compose the congregation1 nor what they 
require1 but the ,lord knows it2 and if 
the preacher renounces his own wisdom1  
he will be assisted by the ,lord2 but if
 he will choose in his own wisdom1 then 
let him not be surprised if he should   
see little benefit result from his      
labours4  ,before ,i leave this part of 
the subject1 ,i would just observe one  
temptation concerning the choice of a   
text4 ,we may see a subject to be so    
very full1 that it may strike us it     
would do for some other occasion4 ,for  
instance1 sometimes a text1 brought to  
one's mind for a week-evening meeting1  
may appear more suitable for the ,lord's
 day1 because then there would be a     
greater number of hearers present4 ,now1
 in the first place1 we do not know     
whether the ,lord ever will allow us to 

preach on another ,lord's day2 and1 in  
the second place1 we know not whether   
that very subject may not be especially 
suitable for some or many individuals   
present just that week-evening4 ,thus ,i
 was once tempted1 after ,i had been a  
short time at ,teignmouth1 to reserve a 
subject1 which had been just opened to  
me1 for the next ,lord's day4 ,but being
 able1 by the grace of ,god1 to overcome
 the temptation by the above reasons1   
and preaching about it at once1 it      
pleased the ,lord to bless it to the    
conversion of a sinner1 and that too an 
individual who meant to come but that   
once more to the chapel1 and to whose   
case the subject was most remarkably    
suited4  #b4 ,now when the text has been
 obtained in the above way1 whether it  
be one or two or more verses1 or a whole
 chapter or more1 ,i ask the ,lord that 
,he would graciously be pleased to teach
 me by ,his ,holy ,spirit1 whilst       
meditating over it4 ,within the last    
fifty years1 ,i have found it the most  

profitable plan to meditate with my pen 
in my hand1 writing down the outlines1  
as the ,word is opened to me4 ,this ,i  
do1 not for the sake of committing them 
to memory1 nor as if ,i meant to say    
nothing else1 but for the sake of       
clearness1 as being a help to see how   
far ,i understand the passage4 ,i also  
find it useful afterwards to refer to   
what ,i have thus written4 ,i very      
seldom use any other help besides the   
little ,i understand of the original of 
the ,scriptures1 and some good          
translations in other languages4 ,my    
chief help is prayer4 ,i have ,,never in
 my life begun to study one single part 
of divine truth1 without gaining some   
light about it1 when ,i have been able  
really to give myself to prayer and     
meditation over it4 ,but that ,i have   
often found a difficult matter1 partly  
on account of the weakness of the flesh1
 and partly also on account of bodily   
infirmities and multiplicity of         
engagements4 ,this ,i most firmly       

believe1 that no one ought to expect to 
see much good resulting from his labours
 in word and doctrine1 if he is not much
 given to prayer and meditation4  #c4   
,having prayed and meditated on the     
subject or text1 ,i desire to leave     
myself entirely in the hands of the     
,lord4 ,i ask ,him to bring to my mind  
what ,i have seen in my room1 concerning
 the subject ,i am going to speak on1   
which ,he generally most kindly does1   
and often teaches me much additionally1 
whilst ,i am preaching4  ,in connection 
with the above1 ,i must1 however1 state1
 that it appears to me there is a       
preparation for the public ministry of  
the ,word1 which is even more excellent 
than the one spoken of4 ,it is this3 to 
live in such constant and real communion
 with the ,lord1 and to be so habitually
 and frequently in meditation over the  
truth1 that without the above effort1 so
 to speak1 we have obtained food for    
others1 and know the mind of the ,lord  
as to the subject or the portion of the 

,word on which we should speak4 ,but    
this ,i have only in a small measure    
experienced1 though ,i desire to be     
brought into such a state1 that         
habitually out of my belly may flow     
rivers of living water4  ,that which ,i 
have found most beneficial in my        
experience for the last fifty-one years 
in the public ministry of the ,word1 is1
 expounding the ,scriptures1 and        
especially the going now and then       
through a whole gospel or epistle4 ,this
 may be done in a two-fold way1 either  
by entering minutely into the bearing of
 every point occurring in the portion1  
or by giving the general outlines1 and  
thus leading the hearers to see the     
meaning and connexion of the whole4 ,the
 benefits which ,i have seen resulting  
from expounding the ,scriptures are     
these3 #a4 ,the hearers are thus1 with  
,god's blessing1 led to the ,scriptures4
 ,they find1 as it were1 a practical use
 of them in the public meetings4 ,this  
induces them to bring their bibles1 and 

,i have observed that those who at first
 did not bring them1 have afterwards    
been induced to do so3 so that in a     
short time few1 of the believers at     
least1 were in the habit of coming      
without them4 ,this is no small matter2 
for every thing1 which in our day will  
lead believers to value the ,scriptures1
 is of importance4 #b4 ,the expounding  
of the ,scriptures is in general more   
beneficial to the hearers than if1 on a 
single verse1 or half a verse1 or two or
 three words of a verse some remarks are
 made1 so that the portion of ,scripture
 is scarcely anything but a motto for   
the subject2 for few have grace to      
meditate much over the ,word1 and thus  
exposition may not merely be the means  
of opening up to them the ,scriptures1  
but may also create in them a desire to 
meditate for themselves4 #c4 ,the       
expounding of the ,scriptures leaves to 
the hearers a connecting link1 so that  
the reading over again the portion of   
the ,word1 which has been expounded1    

brings to their remembrance what has    
been said2 and thus1 with ,god's        
blessing1 leaves a more lasting         
impression on their minds4 ,this is     
particularly of importance as it regards
 the illiterate1 who sometimes have     
neither much strength of memory nor     
capacity of comprehension4 #d4 ,the     
expounding of large portions of the     
,word1 as the whole of a gospel or an   
epistle1 besides leading the hearer to  
see the connexion of the whole1 has also
 this particular benefit for the        
teacher1 that it leads him1 with ,god's 
blessing1 to the consideration of       
portions of the ,word1 which otherwise  
he might not have considered1 and keeps 
him from speaking too much on favourite 
subjects1 and leaning too much to       
particular parts of truth1 which        
tendency must surely sooner or later    
injure both himself and his             
hearers4--,expounding the word of ,god  
brings little honour to the preacher    
from the unenlightened or careless      

hearer1 but it tends much to the benefit
 of the hearers in general4  ,simplicity
 in expression1 whilst the truth is set 
forth1 is1 in connexion with what has   
been said1 of the utmost importance4 ,it
 should be the aim of the teacher to    
speak so1 that children1 servants1 and  
people who cannot read1 may be able to  
understand him1 so far as the natural   
mind can comprehend the things of ,god4 
,it ought also to be remembered1 that   
there is1 perhaps1 not a single         
congregation in which there are not     
persons of the above classes present1   
and that if they can understand1 the    
well-educated or literary persons will  
understand likewise2 but the reverse    
does not hold good4 ,it ought further to
 be remembered that the expounder of the
 truth of ,god speaks for ,god1 for     
eternity1 and that it is not in the     
least likely that he will benefit the   
hearers1 except he uses plainness of    
speech1 which nevertheless needs not to 
be vulgar or rude4 ,it should also be   

considered1 that if the preacher strive 
to speak according to the rules of this 
world1 he may please many1 ,particularly
 those who have a literary taste2 but1  
in the same proportion1 he is less      
likely to become an instrument in the   
hands of ,god for the conversion of     
sinners1 or for the building up of the  
saints4 ,for neither eloquence nor depth
 of thought make the truly great        
preacher1 but such a life of prayer and 
meditation and spirituality1 as may     
render him a vessel meet for the        
,master's use1 and fit to be employed   
both in the conversion of sinners and in
 the edification of the saints4  ,about 
the beginning of ,april ,i went to      
preach at ,sidmouth4 ,while ,i was      
staying there1 three sisters in the     
,lord had1 in my presence1 a            
conversation about baptism1 one of whom 
had been baptized after she had         
believed4 ,when they had conversed a    
little on the subject1 ,i was asked to  
give my opinion concerning it4 ,my reply

 was1 ,i do not think1 that ,i need to  
be baptized again4 ,i was then asked by 
the sister who bad been baptized1 ,but  
have you been baptized8 ,i answered1    
,yes1 when ,i was a child4 ,she then    
replied1 ,have you ever read the        
,scriptures1 and prayed with reference  
to this subject8 ,i answered1 ,no4      
,then1 she said1 ,i entreat you1 never  
to speak any more about it till you have
 done so4 ,it pleased the ,lord to show 
me the importance of this remark2 for   
whilst at that very time ,i was         
exhorting every one to receive nothing  
which could not be proved by the word of
 ,god1 ,i had repeatedly spoken against 
believers' baptism1 without having ever 
earnestly examined the ,scriptures1 or  
prayed concerning it2 and now ,i        
determined1 if ,god would help me1 to   
examine that subject also1 and if infant
 baptism were found to be scriptural1 ,i
 would earnestly defend it2 and if      
believers' baptism were right1 ,i would 
as strenuously defend that1 and be      

baptized4  ,as soon as ,i had time1 ,i  
set about examining the subject4 ,the   
mode ,i adopted was as follows3 ,i      
repeatedly asked ,god to teach me       
concerning it1 and ,i read the ,new     
,testament from the beginning1 with a   
particular reference to this point4 ,but
 now1 when ,i earnestly set about the   
matter1 a number of objections presented
 themselves to my mind4  #a4 ,since many
 holy and enlightened men have been     
divided in opinion concerning this      
point1 does this not prove1 that it is  
not to be expected we should come to a  
satisfactory conclusion about this      
question in the present imperfect state 
of the church8--,this question was thus 
removed3 ,if this ordinance is revealed 
in the ,bible1 why may ,i not know it1  
as the ,holy ,spirit is the teacher in  
the church of ,christ now as well as    
formerly8 #b4 ,there have been but few  
of my friends baptized1 and the greater 
part of them are opposed to believers'  
baptism1 and they will turn their backs 

on me4 ,answer3 ,though all men should  
forsake me1 if the ,lord ,jesus takes me
 up1 ,i shall be happy4 #c4 ,you will be
 sure to lose one half of your income if
 you are baptized4 ,answer3 ,as long as 
,i desire to be faithful to the ,lord1  
,he will not suffer me to want4 #d4     
,people will call you a baptist1 and you
 will be reckoned among that body1 and  
you cannot approve of all that is going 
on among them4 ,answer3 ,it does not    
follow that ,i must in all points go    
along with all those who hold believers'
 baptism1 although ,i should be         
baptized4 #e4 ,you have been preaching  
for some years1 and you will have thus  
publicly to confess1 that you have been 
in an error1 should you be led to see   
that believers' baptism is right4       
,answer3 ,it is much better to confess  
that ,i have been in error concerning   
that point than to continue in it4 #f4  
,even if believers' baptism should be   
right1 yet it is now too late to attend 
to it1 as you ought to have been        

baptized immediately on believing4      
,answer3 ,it is better to fulfill a     
commandment of the ,lord ,jesus ever so 
late1 than to continue in the neglect of
 it4  ,it had pleased ,god1 in his      
abundant mercy1 to bring my mind into   
such a state1 that ,i was willing to    
carry out into my life whatever ,i      
should find in the ,scriptures          
concerning this ordinance1 either the   
one way or the other4 ,i could say1 ,i  
will do ,his will1 and it was on that   
account1 ,i believe1 that ,i soon saw   
which doctrine is of ,god1 whether      
infant baptism or believers' baptism4   
,and ,i would observe here1 by the way1 
that the passage to which ,i have just  
now alluded1 ,john vii4 #ag1 has been a 
most remarkable comment to me on many   
doctrines and precepts of our most holy 
faith4 ,for instance3 ,resist not evil3 
but whosoever shall smite thee on thy   
right cheek1 turn to him the other also4
 ,and if any man will sue thee at the   
law1 and take away thy coat1 let him    

have thy cloak also4 ,and whosoever     
shall compel thee to go a mile1 go with 
him twain4 ,give to him that asketh     
thee1 and from him that would borrow of 
thee turn not thou away4 ,love your     
enemies1 bless them that curse you1 do  
good to them that hate you1 and pray for
 them which despitefully use you1 and   
persecute you4 ,matthew v4 #ci-dd4 ,sell
 that ye have1 and give alms4 ,luke xii4
 #cc4 ,owe no man any thing1 but to love
 one another4 ,rom4 xiii4 #h4 ,it may be
 said1 surely these passages cannot be  
taken literally1 for how then would the 
people of ,god be able to pass through  
the world4 ,the state of mind enjoined  
in ,john vii4 #ag1 will cause such      
objections to vanish4 ,whosoever is     
,,willing ,to ,,act ,,out these         
commandments of the ,lord ,,literally1  
will1 ,i believe1 be led with me to see 
that1 to take them ,,literally1 is the  
will of ,god4--,those who do so take    
them will doubtless often be brought    
into difficulties1 hard to the flesh to 

bear1 but these will have a tendency to 
make them constantly feel that they are 
strangers and pilgrims here1 that this  
world is not their home1 and thus to    
throw them more upon ,god1 who will     
assuredly help us through any difficulty
 into which we may be brought by seeking
 to act in obedience to ,his word4  ,as 
soon as ,i was brought into this state  
of heart1 ,i saw from the ,scriptures   
that believers ,,only are the proper    
subjects for baptism1 and that immersion
 is the only true ,scriptural mode1 in  
which it ought to be attended to4 ,the  
passage which particularly convinced me 
of the former1 is ,acts viii4 #cf-ch1   
and of the latter1 ,rom4 vi4 #c-e4 ,some
 time after1 ,i was baptized4 ,i had    
much peace in doing so1 and never have  
,i for one single moment regretted      
it4--,before ,i leave this point1 ,i    
would just say a few words concerning   
the result of this matter1 so far as it 
regards some of the objections which    
occurred to my mind when ,i was about to

 examine the ,scriptures concerning     
baptism4  #a4 ,concerning the first     
objection1 my conviction now is1 that of
 all revealed truths not on is more     
clearly revealed in the ,scriptures1 not
 even the doctrine of justification by  
faith1 and that the subject has only    
become obscured by men not having been  
willing to take the ,scriptures alone to
 decide the point4  #b4 ,not one of my  
true friends in the ,lord has turned his
 back on me1 as ,i supposed1 and almost 
all of them have been themselves        
baptized since4  #c4 ,though in one way 
,i lost money in consequence of being   
baptized1 yet the ,lord did not suffer  
me to be really a loser1 even as it     
regards temporal things2 for ,he made up
 the loss most bountifully4 ,in         
conclusion1 my example has been the     
means of leading many to examine the    
question of baptism1 and to submit1 from
 conviction1 to this ordinance and      
seeing this truth ,i have been led to   
speak on it as well as on other truths2 

and during the forty-five years that ,i 
have now resided in ,bristol1 more than 
three thousand believers have been      
baptized among us4  ,in ,june of this   
year 7#ahcj7 ,i went to preach at the   
opening of a chapel in a village near   
,barnstaple1 built by that blessed man  
of ,god1 ,thomas ,pugsley1 now with the 
,lord4 ,it pleased ,god to bring two    
souls to ,himself through this my visit1
 and one more was converted on another  
visit4 ,so graciously did the ,lord     
condescend to use me1 that almost       
everywhere ,he blessed the ,word which  
,i preached1 thereby testifying that ,he
 had sent me1 and thereby also getting  
glory to ,himself in using such an      
instrument4 ,it was so usual for me to  
preach with particular assistance1      
especially during the first months of   
this year1 that once1 when it was       
otherwise1 it was much noticed by myself
 and others4 ,the circumstance was this4
 ,one day1 before preaching at          
,teignmouth1 ,i had more time than      

usual1 and therefore prayed and         
meditated about six hours1 in           
preparation for the evening meeting1 and
 ,i thought ,i saw many precious truths 
in the passage on which ,i had          
meditated4 ,it was the first part of the
 first chapter of the epistle to the    
,ephesians4 ,after ,i had spoken a      
little time1 ,i felt that ,i spoke in my
 own strength1 and ,i1 being a          
foreigner1 felt particularly the want of
 words1 which had not been the case     
before4 ,i told the brethren1 that ,i   
felt ,i was left to myself1 and asked   
their prayers4 ,but after having        
continued a little longer1 and feeling  
the same as before1 ,i closed1 and      
proposed that we should have a meeting  
for prayer1 that the ,lord still might  
be pleased to help me4 ,we did so1 and  
,i was particularly assisted the next   
time4  ,during this summer also it      
appeared to me scriptural1 according to 
the example of the ,apostles1 ,acts xx4 
#g1 to break bread every ,lord's day1   

though there is no commandment given to 
do so1 either by the ,lord1 or by the   
,holy ,ghost through the ,apostles4 ,and
 at the same time it appeared to me     
scriptural1 according to ,eph4 iv41     
,rom4 xii41 c41 that there should be    
given room for the ,holy ,ghost to work 
through any of the brethren whom ,he    
pleased to use2 that thus one member    
might benefit the other with the gift   
which the ,lord has bestowed upon him4  
,accordingly at certain meetings any of 
the brethren had an opportunity to      
exhort or teach the rest1 if they       
considered that they had any thing to   
say which might be beneficial to the    
hearers4--,i observe here1 that1 as the 
,lord gave me grace to endeavour at once
 to carry out the light which ,he had   
been pleased to give me on this point1  
and as the truth was but in part        
apprehended1 there was much infirmity   
mixed with the manner of carrying it    
out4 ,nor was it until several years    
after that the ,lord was pleased to     

teach me about this point more          
perfectly4 ,that the disciples of ,jesus
 should meet together1 on the first day 
of the week1 for the breaking of bread1 
and that that should be their principal 
meeting1 and that those1 whether one or 
several1 who are truly gifted by the    
,holy ,spirit for service1 be it for    
exhortation1 or teaching1 or rule1 c41  
are responsible to the ,lord for the    
exercise of their gifts3 these are to me
 no matters of uncertainty1 but points  
on which my soul1 by grace1 is          
established1 through the revealed will  
of ,god4  ,on ,october #gth1 #ahcj1 ,i  
was united by marriage to ,miss ,mary   
,groves1 sister of the brother whose    
name has already been mentioned4 ,this  
step was taken after prayer and         
deliberation1 from a full conviction    
that it was better for me to be married3
 and ,i have never regretted since1     
either the step itself or the choice1   
but desire to be truly grateful to ,god 
for having given me such a wife4  ,about

 this time ,i began to have             
conscientious objections against any    
longer receiving a stated salary4 ,my   
reasons against it were these3--  #a4   
,the salary was made up by pew-rents2   
but pew-rents are1 according to ,james  
ii4 #a-f1 against the mind of the ,lord1
 as1 in general1 the poor brother cannot
 have so good a seat as the rich4 7,all 
pew-rents were therefore given up1 and  
all the seats made free1 which was      
stated at the entrance of the chapel74  
#b4 ,a brother may gladly do something  
towards my support if left to his own   
time2 but when the quarter is up1 he has
 perhaps other expenses1 and ,i do not  
know1 whether he pays his money         
grudgingly1 and of necessity1 or        
cheerfully2 but ,god loveth a cheerful  
giver4 ,nay1 ,i knew it to be a fact1   
that sometimes it had not been          
convenient to individuals to pay the    
money1 when it had been asked for by the
 brethren who collected it4 #c4 ,though 
the ,lord had been pleased to give me   

grace to be faithful1 so that ,i had    
been enabled not to keep back the truth1
 when ,he had shown it to me2 still ,i  
felt that the pew-rents were a snare to 
the servant of ,christ4 ,it was a       
temptation to me1 at least for a few    
minutes1 at the time when the ,lord had 
stirred me up to pray and search the    
,word respecting the ordinance of       
baptism1 because ,l#cj4 of my salary was
 at stake1 if ,i should be baptized4    
,for these reasons ,i stated to the     
brethren1 at the end of ,october1 #ahcj1
 that ,i should for the future give up  
having any regular salary4 ,after ,i had
 given my reasons for doing so1 ,i read 
,philippians iv41 and told the saints1  
that if they still had a desire to do   
something towards my support1 by        
voluntary gifts1 ,i had no objection to 
receive them1 though ever so small1     
either in money or provisions4 ,a few   
days after it appeared to me1 that there
 was a better way still2 for if ,i      
received personally every single gift1  

offered in money1 both my own time and  
that of the donors would be much taken  
up2 and in this way also the poor might1
 through temptation1 be kept from       
offering their pence1 a privilege of    
which they ought not to be deprived2 and
 some also might in this way give more  
than if it were not known who was the   
giver2 so that it would still be        
doubtful whether the gifts were given   
grudgingly or cheerfully4 ,for these    
reasons especially1 there was a box put 
up in the chapel1 over which was        
written1 that whoever had a desire to do
 something towards my support1 might put
 his offering into the box4  ,at the    
same time it appeared to me right1 that 
henceforth ,i should ask no man1 not    
even my beloved brethren and sisters1 to
 help me1 as ,i had done a few times    
according to their own request1 as my   
expenses1 on account of traveling much  
in the ,lord's service1 were too great  
to be met by my usual income4 ,for      
unconsciously ,i had thus again been    

led1 in some measure1 to trust in an arm
 of flesh2 going to man1 instead of     
going to the ,lord at once4 ,to come to 
this conclusion before ,god1 required   
more grace than to give up my salary4   
,about the same time also my wife and ,i
 had grace given to us to take the      
,lord's commandment1 ,sell that ye have1
 and give alms1 ,luke xii4 #cc1         
literally1 and to carry it out4 ,our    
staff and support in this matter were   
,matthew vi4 #ai-cd1 ,john xiv4 #ac1    
#ad4 ,we leaned on the arm of the ,lord 
,jesus4 ,it is now fifty-one years1     
since we set out in this way1 and we do 
not in the least regret the step we then
 took4 ,our ,god also has1 in ,his      
tender mercy1 given us grace to abide in
 the same mind concerning the above     
points1 both as it regards principle and
 practice2 and this has been the means  
of letting us see the tender love and   
care of our ,god over ,his children1    
even in the most minute things1 in a way
 in which we never experimentally knew  

them before2 and it has1 in particular1 
made the ,lord known to us more fully   
than we knew ,him before1 as a prayer   
hearing ,god4 ,as ,i have written down  
how the ,lord has been pleased to deal  
with us since1 ,i shall be able to      
relate some facts concerning this       
matter1 as far as they may tend to      
edification4  ,extracts from my         
,journal4  ,nov4 #ahth1 #ahcj4--,our    
money was reduced to about eight        
shillings4 ,when ,i was praying with my 
wife in the morning1 the ,lord brought  
to my mind the state of our purse1 and  
,i was led to ask ,him for some money4  
,about four hours after1 we were with a 
sister at ,bishopsteignton1 and she said
 to me1 ,do you want any money8 ,i told 
the brethren1 said ,i1 dear sister1 when
 ,i gave up my salary1 that ,i would for
 the future tell the ,lord only about my
 wants4 ,she replied1 ,but ,he has told 
me to give you some money4 ,about a     
fortnight ago ,i asked ,him1 what ,i    
should do for ,him1 and ,he told me to  

give you some money2 and last ,saturday 
it came again powerfully to my mind1 and
 has not left me since1 and ,i felt it  
so forcibly last night1 that ,i could   
not help speaking of it to ,brother ,p4 
,my heart rejoiced1 seeing the ,lord's  
faithfulness1 but ,i thought it better  
not to tell her about our circumstances1
 lest she should be influenced to give  
accordingly2 and ,i also was assured1   
that1 if it were of the ,lord1 she could
 not but give4 ,i therefore turned the  
conversation to other subjects1 but when
 ,i left she gave me two guineas4 ,we   
were full of joy on account of the      
goodness of the ,lord4--,i would call   
upon the reader to admire the gentleness
 of the ,lord1 that ,he did not try our 
faith much at the commencement1 but gave
 us first encouragement1 and allowed us 
to see ,his willingness to help us1     
before ,he was pleased to try it more   
fully4  ,the next ,wednesday ,i went to 
,exmouth1 our money having then again   
been reduced to about nine shillings4 ,i

 asked the ,lord on ,thursday1 when at  
,exmouth1 to be pleased to give me some 
money4 ,on ,friday morning1 about eight 
o'clock1 whilst in prayer1 ,i was       
particularly led to ask again for money2
 and before ,i rose from my knees ,i had
 the fullest assurance1 that we should  
have the answer that very day4 ,about   
nine o'clock ,i left the brother with   
whom ,i was staying1 and he gave me half
 a sovereign1 saying1 ,take this for the
 expenses connected with your coming to 
us4 ,i did not expect to have my        
expenses paid1 but ,i saw the ,lord's   
fatherly hand in sending me this money  
within one hour after my asking ,him for
 some4 ,but even then ,i was so fully   
assured that the ,lord would send more  
that very day1 or had done so already1  
that1 when ,i came home about twelve    
o'clock1 ,i asked my wife whether she   
had received any letters4 ,she told me  
she had received one the day before from
 a brother in ,exeter1 with three       
sovereigns4 ,thus even my prayer on the 

preceding day had been answered4 ,the   
next day one of the brethren came and   
brought me ,l#d41 which was due to me of
 my former salary1 but which ,i could   
never have expected1 as ,i did not even 
know that this sum was due to me4 ,thus 
,i received1 within thirty hours1 in    
answer to prayer1 ,l#g4 #ajs4  ,in the  
commencement of ,december ,i went to    
,collumpton1 where ,i preached several  
times1 and likewise in a neighbouring   
village4 ,in driving home from the      
village late at night1 our driver lost  
his way4 ,as soon as we found out our   
mistake1 being then near a house1 it    
struck me that the hand of ,god was in  
this matter2 and having awakened the    
people of the house1 ,i offered a man   
something if he would be kind enough to 
bring us into the right road4 ,i now    
walked with the man before the gig1 and 
conversed with him about the things of  
,god1 and soon found out that he was an 
awful backslider4 ,may ,god1 in mercy1  
bless the word spoken to him1 and may we

 learn from this circumstance1 that we  
have to ask on such occasions1 why the  
,lord has allowed such and such things  
to happen to us4--,since the publication
 of the first edition1 one day1 about   
eight years after this circumstance had 
happened1 the individual who drove me   
that night introduced himself to me as a
 believer1 and told me that on that     
evening he received his first           
impressions under the preaching of the  
,word4 ,the missing of the right road   
may have been connected with his state  
of mind4 ,may ,i and my fellow-labourers
 in the ,gospel be encouraged by this1  
patiently to continue to sow the seed1  
though only after eight years or more we
 should see the fruit of it4 ,i only    
add1 that up to that time1 the          
individual had been a very dissipated   
young man1 who caused his believing     
parents very much grief4 ,their love led
 them to convey me and my wife to this  
village and back again1 and truly the   
,lord gave them a reward in doing so4   

,between ,christmas and the new year1   
when our money was reduced to a few     
shillings1 ,i asked the ,lord for more2 
when a few hours after there was given  
to us a sovereign by a brother from     
,axminster4 ,this brother had heard much
 against me1 and was at last determined 
to hear for himself1 and thus came to   
,teignmouth1 a distance of forty miles2 
and having heard about our manner of    
living1 gave us this money4  ,with this 
closes the year #ahcj4 ,throughout it   
the ,lord richly supplied all my        
temporal wants1 though at the           
commencement of it ,i had no certain    
human prospect for one single shilling2 
so that1 even as it regards temporal    
things1 ,i had not been in the smallest 
degree a loser in acting according to   
the dictates of my conscience2 and1 as  
it regards spiritual things1 the ,lord  
had indeed dealt bountifully with me1   
and led me on in many respects1 and1    
moreover1 had condescended to use me as 
an instrument in doing ,his work4  ,on  

,january #fth1 #gth1 and #hth1 #ahca1 ,i
 had repeatedly asked the ,lord for     
money1 but received none4 ,on the       
evening of ,january #hth ,i left my room
 for a few minutes1 and was then tempted
 to distrust the ,lord1 though ,he had  
been so gracious to us1 in that ,he not 
only up to that day had supplied all our
 wants1 but had given us also those     
answers of prayer1 which have been in   
part just mentioned4 ,i was so sinful1  
for about five minutes1 as to think it  
would be of no use to trust in the ,lord
 in this way4 ,i also began to say to   
myself1 that ,i had perhaps gone too far
 in living in this way4 ,but1 thanks to 
the ,lord6 this trial lasted but a few  
minutes4 ,he enabled me again to trust  
in ,him1 and ,satan was immediately     
confounded2 for when ,i returned to my  
room 7out of which ,i had not been      
absent ten minutes71 the ,lord had sent 
deliverance4 ,a sister in the ,lord1 who
 resided at ,exeter1 had come to        
,teignmouth1 and brought us ,l#b4 #ds42 

so the ,lord triumphed1 and our faith   
was strengthened4  ,jan4 #aj4 ,today1   
when we had again but a few shillings1  
,l#e4 was given to us1 which had been   
taken out of the box4 ,i had1 once for  
all1 told the brethren1 who had the care
 of these temporal things1 to have the  
kindness to let me have the money every 
week2 but as these beloved brethren     
either forgot to take it out weekly1 or 
were ashamed to bring it in such small  
sums1 it was generally taken out every  
three1 four1 or five weeks4 ,as ,i had  
stated to them1 however1 from the       
commencement1 that ,i desired to look   
neither to man nor the box1 but to the  
living ,god1 ,i thought it not right on 
my part1 to remind them of my request to
 have the money weekly1 lest it should  
hinder the testimony which ,i wished to 
give1 of trusting in the living ,god    
alone4 ,it was on this account that on  
,january #bhth1 when we had again but   
little money1 though ,i had seen the    
brethren on ,january the #bdth open the 

box and take out the money1 ,i would not
 ask the brother1 in whose hands it was1
 to let me have it2 but1 standing in    
need of it1 as our coals were almost    
gone1 ,i asked the ,lord to incline his 
heart to bring it1 and but a little time
 afterwards it was given to us1 even    
,l#a4 #hs4 #f;d4  ,i would here mention1
 that since the time ,i began living in 
this way1 ,i have been kept from        
speaking1 either directly or indirectly1
 about my wants1 at the time ,i was in  
need4 ,but whilst ,i have refrained1 and
 do still habitually refrain1 from      
speaking to my fellow creatures about my
 wants at the time1 ,i desire to speak  
well of the ,lord's goodness1 after ,he 
has delivered me2 not only in order that
 ,he thus may get glory1 but also that  
the children of ,god may be encouraged  
to trust in ,him4  ,on ,february #adth  
we had again very little money1 and1    
whilst praying1 ,i was led to ask the   
,lord1 graciously to supply our wants2  
and the instant that ,i rose from my    

knees1 a brother gave me ,l#a41 which   
had been taken out of the box4  ,on     
,march #gth ,i was again tempted to     
disbelieve the faithfulness of the      
,lord1 and though ,i was not miserable1 
still ,i was not so fully resting upon  
the ,lord1 that ,i could triumph with   
joy4 ,it was but one hour after1 when   
the ,lord gave me another proof of ,his 
faithful love4 ,a ,christian lady at    
,teignmouth had been from home for some 
time1 and on her return she brought from
 the sisters in the ,lord1 with whom she
 had been staying1 five sovereigns for  
us1 with these words written in the     
paper2--,i was an hungered1 and ye gave 
me meat2 ,i was thirsty1 and ye gave me 
drink4 ,lord1 when saw we ,thee an      
hungered1 and fed ,thee8 or thirsty1 and
 gave ,thee drink8 ,the ,king shall     
answer and say unto them1 ,verily1      
verily1 ,i say unto you1 inasmuch as ye 
have done it unto one of the least of   
these my brethren1 ye have done it unto 
me4  ,on ,march #afth ,i went to        

,axminster1 and preached in several     
places in that neighbourhood1 besides   
holding a meeting at ,axminster4 ,whilst
 staying there ,i was requested to      
preach at ,chard2 but as ,i had never   
been away from ,teignmouth on the       
,lord's day1 ,i had to pray much1 before
 ,i came to the conclusion to comply    
with the request4 ,at last ,i had the   
fullest assurance that ,i ought to      
preach at ,chard4 ,i have since heard   
that the ,lord used me in edifying the  
brethren1 and through a general         
exhortation to all1 to read the         
,scriptures with earnestness1 a woman   
was stirred up to do so1 and this was   
the means of her conversion4 ,as to     
myself1 ,i had a most refreshing season4
 ,i mention this circumstance to show   
how important it is to ascertain the    
will of ,god1 before we undertake any   
thing1 because we are then not only     
blessed in our own souls1 but also the  
work of our hands will prosper4--,one of
 the brethren at ,chard forced a        

sovereign upon me1 against the          
acceptance of which ,i strove much1 lest
 it should appear as if ,i had preached 
for money4 ,another would give me a     
paper with money4 ,i refused it for the 
same reason4 ,at last he put it by force
 into my pocket1 and ran away4 ,the     
paper contained #aas4 #f;d4  ,april     
#afth4 ,this morning ,i found that our  
money was reduced to #cs41 and ,i said  
to myself1 ,i must now go and ask the   
,lord earnestly for fresh supplies4 ,but
 before ,i had prayed1 there was sent   
from ,exeter ,l#b1 as a proof that the  
,lord hears before we call4  ,i would   
observe here1 by the way1 that if any of
 the children of ,god should think that 
such a mode of living leads away from   
the ,lord1 and from caring about        
spiritual things1 and has the effect of 
causing the mind to be taken up with the
 question1 ,what shall ,i eat8 ,what    
shall ,i drink8--and ,wherewithal shall 
,i be clothed8 and that on that account 
it would be much better to have a stated

 salary1 particularly for one who       
labours in the word and doctrine1 in    
order that he may be above these cares2 
,i say1 should any believer think so1 ,i
 would request him1 prayerfully to      
consider the following remarks3--#a4 ,i 
have had experience of both ways1 and   
know that my present mode of living1 as 
to temporal things1 is connected with   
less care4 #b4 ,confidence in the ,lord1
 to whom alone ,i look for the supply of
 my temporal wants1 keeps me1 at least  
whilst faith is in exercise1 when a case
 of distress comes before me1 or when   
the ,lord's work calls for my pecuniary 
aid1 from anxious reckoning like this3  
,will my salary last out8 ,shall ,i have
 enough myself the next month8 c4 ,in   
this my freedom1 ,i am1 by the grace of 
,god1 generally at least1 able to say to
 myself something like this3--,my ,lord 
is not limited2 ,he can again supply2   
,he knows that this present case has    
been sent to me2 and thus1 this way of  
living1 so far from leading to anxiety1 

as it regards possible future want1 is  
rather the means of keeping from it4    
,and truly it was once said to me by an 
individual1--,you can do such and such  
things1 and need not to lay by1 for the 
church in the whole of ,devonshire cares
 about your wants4 ,my reply was3 ,the  
,lord can use not merely any of the     
saints throughout ,devonshire1 but those
 throughout the world1 as instruments to
 supply my temporal wants4 #c4 ,this way
 of living has often been the means of  
reviving the work of grace in my heart1 
when ,i have been getting cold2 and it  
also has been the means of bringing me  
back again to the ,lord1 after ,i have  
been backsliding4 ,for it will not      
do1--it is not possible1 to live in sin1
 and1 at the same time1 by communion    
with ,god1 to draw down from heaven     
every thing one needs for the life that 
now is4 #d4 ,frequently1 too1 a fresh   
answer to prayer1 obtained in this way1 
has been the means of quickening my     
soul1 and filling me with much joy4     

,about ,april #bjth ,i went to          
,chumleigh4 ,here and in the            
neighbourhood ,i preached repeatedly1   
and from thence ,i went to ,barnstaple4 
,whilst we were at ,barnstaple1 there   
was found in my wife's bag a sovereign1 
put there anonymously4 ,a sister also   
gave us ,l#b4 ,on our return to         
,teignmouth1 ,may #b1 when we emptied   
our travelling bag1 there fell out a    
paper with money4 ,it contained two     
sovereigns and threepence1 the latter   
put in1 no doubt1 to make a noise in    
emptying the bag4 ,may the ,lord bless  
and reward the giver6 ,in a similar way 
we found #ds4 put anonymously into one  
of our drawers1 a few days after4  ,june
 #f4 ,having prayed much on the previous
 days1 that1 when we wanted money1 the  
,lord would be pleased to send some1    
today1 after ,i had again asked for it1 
a poor sister brought half a sovereign1 
#es4 from herself1 and #es4 from another
 very poor sister4 ,this is not only a  
fresh proof that the ,lord hears prayer1

 but also that ,he sends by whom ,he    
will4 ,our money had been reduced to    
#hs4  ,june #ab4 ,lord's day4 ,on       
,thursday last ,i went with brother     
,craik to ,torquay1 to preach there4 ,i 
had only about #cs4 with me and left my 
wife with about #fs4 at home4 ,the ,lord
 provided beds for us through the       
hospitality of a brother4 ,i asked the  
,lord repeatedly for money2 but when ,i 
came home my wife had only about #cs4   
left1 having received nothing4 ,we      
waited still upon the ,lord4 ,yesterday 
passed away1 and no money came4 ,we had 
#i;d4 left4 ,this morning we were still 
waiting upon the ,lord1 and looking for 
deliverance4 ,we had only a little      
butter left for breakfast1 sufficient   
for brother ,e4 and a relative living   
with us1 to whom we did not mention our 
circumstances1 that they might not be   
made uncomfortable4 ,after the morning  
meeting1 brother ,y4 most unexpectedly  
opened the box1 and1 in giving me quite 
as unexpectedly the money at such a     

time1 he told me that he and his wife   
could not sleep last night on account of
 thinking that we might want money4 ,the
 most striking point is1 that1 after ,i 
had repeatedly asked the ,lord1 but     
received nothing1 ,i then prayed        
yesterday1 that the ,lord would be      
pleased to impress it on brother ,y4    
that we wanted money1 so that he might  
open the box4 ,there was in it ,l#a4    
#hs4 #aj #a_/b;d4 ,our joy on account of
 this fresh deliverance was great1 and  
we praised the ,lord heartily4  ,june   
#ah4 ,brother ,craik called on us today1
 and he then had only #a #a_/b;d4 left4 
,a few minutes after1 he received3 a sum
 of money1 and in returning to us on his
 way home1 he gave us #ajs41 when we had
 but #cs4 left4  ,july #bj4 ,a shoulder 
of mutton and a loaf were sent to us    
anonymously4--,i understood some time   
afterwards1 that ,satan had raised the  
false report that we were starving1 in  
consequence of which a believer sent    
these provisions4 ,i would mention by   

the way1 that various reports have been 
circulated1 on account of this our way  
of living4 ,sometimes it has been said  
that we had not enough to eat1 and that 
surely such and such an infirmity of    
body we had brought on us1 because we   
had not the necessaries of life4 ,now1  
the truth is1 that1 whilst we have been 
often brought low2 yea1 so low1 that we 
have not had even as much as one single 
penny left2 or so as to have the last   
bread on the table1 and not as much     
money as was needed to buy another      
loaf2--yet never have we had to sit down
 to a meal1 without our good ,lord      
having provided nourishing food for us4 
,i am bound to state this1 and ,i do it 
with pleasure4 ,my ,master has been a   
kind ,master to me1 and if ,i had to    
choose this day again1 as to the way of 
living1 the ,lord giving me grace1 ,i   
would not choose differently4 ,but even 
these very reports1 false as they were1 
,i doubt not the ,lord has sometimes    
used as a means1 to put it into the     

hearts of ,his children1 to remember our
 temporal necessities4  ,about ,july    
#beth ,i preached several times at      
,collumpton1 and in a neighbouring      
village1 in the open air4 ,my experience
 as it regards preaching in the open air
 has been very different from what ,i   
might have expected4 ,i have often      
preached out of doors1 and but once has 
it been blessed1 as far as ,i know1 and 
that was in the case of an officer in   
the army1 who came to make sport of it2 
whilst almost in every place1 if not in 
every place1 where ,i have preached in  
rooms or chapels1 the ,lord has given   
testimony to the ,word4 ,perhaps the    
,lord has not been pleased to let me see
 fruit from this part of my work1 though
 ,i have been many times engaged in it2 
or it may be1 that1 because ,i did not  
pray so earnestly respecting my out-door
 preaching as respecting my in-door     
preaching1 the former has not been so   
much blessed as the latter4 ,but this   
testimony ,i cannot but bear1 that1     

though ,i do not consider it at present 
my work1 on account of want of bodily   
strength1 yet it is a most important    
work1 and ,i should delight in being so 
honoured now1 as to be allowed to be    
engaged in it4  ,august #i4 ,after      
extreme suffering1 which lasted about   
seventeen hours1 my wife was this day   
delivered of a still-born child4--,who  
of my readers would suppose1 that whilst
 ,i was so abundantly blessed by ,god1  
and that in so many respects1 my heart  
should have been again many times during
 several months previous to this day1   
cold1 wretched1 carnal8 ,how            
long-suffering is the ,lord6            
,repeatedly1 during this time1 ,i could 
let hours run on1 after ,i had risen in 
the morning1 before ,i prayed2 at least1
 before ,i retired for prayer4 ,and at  
that time when ,i appeared most zealous 
for ,god1 perhaps more so than at any   
time before or since1 ,i was often far  
from being in a spiritual state4 ,i was 
not now1 indeed1 indulging in gross     

outward sins1 which could be noticed by 
my brethren2 but often--very often1 the 
eye of my kind loving ,father must have 
looked on me with much grief4 ,on this  
account1 ,i have no doubt1 the ,lord    
now1 in great compassion1 sent this     
heavy blow4 ,i had not seriously thought
 of the great danger connected with     
childbearing1 and therefore had never   
earnestly prayed about it4 ,now came    
this solemn time4 ,the life of my dear  
wife was hanging1 as it were1 on a      
thread1 and1 in the midst of it1 my     
conscience told me1 that my state of    
heart made such a chastisement needful4 
,yet1 at the same time1 ,i was much     
supported4--,when the child was         
still-born1 ,i saw almost immediately   
afterwards1 that this could not have    
been expected otherwise1 for ,i had not 
looked on the prospect of having a child
 as on a blessing1 which ,i was about to
 receive from ,god1 but rather          
considered it as a burden and a         
hindrance in the ,lord's work2 for ,i   

did not know then1 that1 whilst a wife  
and children may be in certain respects1
 on the one hand1 a hindrance to the    
servant of ,christ1 they also may fit   
him1 on the other hand1 for certain     
parts of his work1 in teaching him      
things which are important to be known1 
especially for the pastoral work4 ,the  
,lord now brought1 in addition to this1 
very great sufferings upon my beloved   
wife1 which lasted for six weeks1       
combined with a partial lameness of the 
left side4--,immediately after the      
eventful time of ,august #hth and #ith1 
the ,lord brought me1 in ,his tender    
mercy1 again into a spiritual state of  
heart1 so that ,i was enabled to look on
 this chastisement as a great blessing4 
,may this my experience be a warning to 
believing readers1 that the ,lord may   
not need to chastise them1 on account of
 their state of heart6 ,may it also be a
 fresh proof to them1 that the ,lord1 in
 ,his very love and faithfulness1 will  
not1 and cannot let us go on in         

backsliding1 but that ,he will visit us 
with stripes1 to bring us back to       
,himself6  ,there was one point1        
however1 in which1 by grace1 ,i had     
continued to be faithful to ,god1 i4e4  
in my mode of living1 and1 therefore1 in
 as far as ,i had been faithfully       
sowing1 ,i now reaped abundantly2 for   
the ,lord most graciously supplied1 in  
rich abundance1 all our temporal wants1 
though they were many4 ,another reason  
for this may have been1 that the ,lord  
never lays more on us1 in the way of    
chastisement1 than our state of heart   
makes needful2 so that whilst ,he smites
 with the one hand1 ,he supports with   
the other4--,we saw it to be against the
 ,lord's mind to put by any money for my
 wife's confinement1 though we might    
have1 humanly speaking1 very easily     
saved ,l#bj4 or ,l#cj4 during the six   
months previous to ,august #gth4 ,i say1
 humanly speaking1 and judging from what
 we had received during all these       
months1 we might have laid by as much as

 the above sums2 but ,i have every      
reason to believe1 that1 had ,i begun to
 lay up1 the ,lord would have stopped   
the supplies1 and thus1 the ability of  
doing so was only apparent4 ,let no one 
profess to trust in ,god1 and yet lay up
 for future wants1 otherwise the ,lord  
will first send him to the hoard he has 
amassed1 before ,he can answer the      
prayer for more4 ,we were persuaded1    
that1 if we laid out our money in the   
,lord's service1 ,he would send more    
when we needed it2 and this our faith1  
,his own gift1 ,he graciously honoured1 
inasmuch as ,he not merely gave us what 
we needed1 but much more4  ,on ,august  
#fth1 just before this time of need1 the
 ,lord sent us ,l#e4 from a distance of 
about forty miles1 and that from a      
sister1 whom1 up to this day1 neither of
 us know personally4 ,on ,august #gth ,i
 received ,l#a4 #js4 #i #a_/b;d4 out of 
the box4 ,august #aeth1 from a distance 
of twenty-five miles was sent ,l#e41 and
 from a distance of about seventy miles 

,l#a4 ,august #ahth1 whilst preaching at
 ,chudleigh1 ,l#a4 was sent to me1 and a
 brother sent from ,exeter ,l#b4 ,august
 #bast was again sent from a distance of
 seventy miles ,l#e41 and ,august #bcrd 
another ,l#e4 from the same place4      
,also1 ,august #bbnd1 #afs4 #i;d4 was   
given out of the box4 ,august #bdth1 a  
brother1 who is a day labourer1 gave me 
#bs4 #f;d4 ,august #cast1 #es4 was given
 to me4 ,september #crd1 whilst         
preaching at ,chudleigh1 ,l#c4 #ajs4 was
 given to me by a brother and three     
sisters4 ,september #dth1 a sister gave 
me a guinea1 and also out of the box was
 given #is4 #h;d4 ,september #ajth1     
,l#f4 was given to me4 ,thus1 within    
about one month1 the ,lord not only sent
 us nearly ,l#dj41 but likewise all     
sorts of suitable provisions and        
refreshments1 needful at such a time2   
and1 in addition to this1 the two       
medical gentlemen who attended my wife  
would not take any remuneration for     
their unwearied attention and kindness1 

during the space of six weeks4 ,thus the
 ,lord gave us even more than we could  
have saved1 if we had endeavoured to do 
so4  ,november #afth4 ,this morning ,i  
proposed united prayer respecting our   
temporal wants4 ,just as we were about  
to pray1 a parcel came from ,exmouth4   
,in prayer we asked the ,lord for meat  
for dinner1 having no money to buy any4 
,after prayer1 on opening the parcel1 we
 found1 among other things1 a ham1 sent 
by a brother at ,exmouth1 which served  
us for dinner4 ,thus not only our own   
family was provided for1 but also a     
sister in the ,lord then staying with   
us4  ,november #agth4 ,today we had not 
a single penny left4 ,we had asked the  
,lord yesterday and today4 ,we desired  
only enough money to be able to buy     
bread4 ,we were reduced more than ever  
we had been before4 ,but our gracious   
and faithful ,lord1 who never lays more 
upon ,his children than ,he enables them
 to bear1 delivered us again this time1 
by sending us ,l#a4 #ajs4 #f;d41 about  

an hour before we wanted money to buy   
bread4  ,november #aith4 ,we had not    
enough to pay our weekly rent2 but the  
,lord graciously sent us again today    
#ads4 #f;d4 ,i would just observe1 that 
we never contract debts1 which we       
believe to be unscriptural 7according to
 ,romans xiii4 #h27 and therefore we    
have no bills with our tailor1          
shoemaker1 grocer1 butcher1 baker1 c42  
but all we buy we pay for in ready      
money4 ,the ,lord helping us1 we would  
rather suffer privation1 than contract  
debts4 ,thus we always know how much we 
have1 and how much we have a right to   
give away4 ,may ,i entreat the believing
 reader1 prayerfully to consider this   
matter2 for ,i am well aware that many  
trials come upon the children of ,god1  
on account of not acting according to   
,rom4 xiii4 #h4  ,november #bgth1       
,lord's day4 ,our money had been reduced
 to #b #a_/b;d42 our bread was hardly   
enough for this day4 ,i had several     
times brought our need before the ,lord4

 ,after dinner1 when ,i returned thanks1
 ,i asked ,him to give us our daily     
bread1 meaning literally that ,he would 
send us bread for the evening4 ,whilst  
,i was praying1 there was a knock at the
 door of the room4 ,after ,i had        
concluded1 a poor sister came in1 and   
brought us some of her dinner1 and from 
another poor sister1 #es4 ,in the       
afternoon she also brought us a large   
loaf4 ,thus the ,lord not only literally
 gave us bread1 but also money4  ,in    
reading about all these answers to      
prayer1 the believing reader may be led 
to think that ,i am spiritually minded  
above most of the children of ,god1 and 
that1 therefore1 the ,lord favours us   
thus4 ,the true reason is this4 ,just in
 as many points as we are acting        
according to the mind of ,god1 in so    
many are we blessed and made a blessing4
 ,our manner of living is according to  
the mind of the ,lord1 for ,he delights 
in seeing ,his children thus come to    
,him 7,matt4 vi472 and therefore1 though

 ,i am weak and erring in many points1  
yet ,he blesses me in this particular1  
and1 ,i doubt not1 will bless me1 as    
long as ,he shall enable me to act      
according to ,his will in this matter4  
,after we had1 on ,december #cast1      
#ahca1 looked over the ,lord's gracious 
dealings with us during the past year1  
in providing for all our temporal wants1
 we had about #ajs4 left4 ,a little     
while after1 the providence of ,god     
called for that1 so that not a single   
farthing remained4 ,thus we closed the  
old year1 in which the ,lord had been so
 gracious in giving to us1 without our  
asking any one3--  #a4 ,through the     
instrumentality of the box1 ,l#ca4      
#ads4--  #b4 ,from brethren of the      
,church at ,teignmouth1 in presents of  
money1 ,l#f4 #ahs4 #f;d4  #c4 ,from     
brethren living at ,teignmouth and      
elsewhere1 not connected with the       
,church at ,teignmouth1 ,l#ic4 #fs4     
#b;d4 ,altogether1 ,l#aca4 #ahs4 #h;d4  
,there had been likewise many articles  

of provision and some articles of       
clothing given to us1 worth at least    
,l#bj4 ,i am so particular in mentioning
 these things1 to show that we are never
 losers by acting according to the mind 
of the ,lord4 ,for had ,i had my regular
 salary1 humanly speaking1 ,i should not
 have had nearly as much2 but whether   
this would have been the case or not1   
this is plain1 that ,i have not served a
 hard ,master1 and that is what ,i      
delight to show4 ,for1 to speak well of 
,his name1 that thus my beloved         
fellow-pilgrims1 who may read this1 may 
be encouraged to trust in ,him1 is the  
chief purpose of my writing4  ,we had   
now in the new year to look up to our   
kind ,father for new mercies1 and during
 the year #ahcb also we found ,him as   
faithful and compassionate as before1   
not laying more on us than ,he enabled  
us to bear1 though space will only      
permit me to mention a few particulars4 
,january #g1 #ahcb4 ,we had been again  
repeatedly asking the ,lord today and   

yesterday to supply our temporal wants1 
having no means to pay our weekly rent2 
and this evening1 as late as eleven     
o'clock1 a brother gave us #ais4 #f;d41 
a proof that the ,lord is not limited to
 time4  ,january #ac4 ,the ,lord has    
again graciously fed us today4 ,we have 
#e;d4 left1 some bread1 rice1 meat1     
potatoes1 and other good things1 and1   
above all1 the ,lord ,jesus4 ,he who has
 provided will provide4  ,january #ad4  
,this morning we had nothing but dry    
bread with our tea2 only the second time
 since we have been living by simple    
faith upon ,jesus for temporal supplies4
 ,we have more than ,l#dj4 of ready     
money in the house for two bills1#b     
which will not be payable for several   
weeks2 but we do not consider this money
 to be our own1 and would rather suffer 
great privation1 ,god helping us1 than  
take of it4 ,i thank the ,lord1 who     
gives me grace to be more faithful in   
these matters than ,i used to be        
formerly1 when ,i would have taken of   

it1 and said1 that by the time the money
 was actually due1 ,i should be able to 
replace it4 ,we were looking to our     
,father1 and ,he has not suffered us to 
be disappointed4 ,for when now we had   
but #c;d4 left1 and only a small piece  
of bread1 we received #bs4 and #es41 the
 particulars concerning which would take
 up too much space4  ,february #ah4     
,this afternoon ,i broke a blood vessel 
in my stomach1 and lost a considerable  
quantity of blood4 ,i was very happy    
immediately afterwards4 ,february #ai4  
,this morning1 ,lord's day1 two brethren
 called on me1 to ask me what           
arrangement there should be made today1 
as it regarded the four villages1 where 
some of the brethren were in the habit  
of preaching1 as1 on account of my not  
being able to preach1 one of the        
brethren would need to stay at home to  
take my place4 ,i asked them1 kindly to 
come again in about an hour1 when ,i    
would give them an answer4 ,after they  
were gone1 the ,lord gave me faith to   

rise4 ,i dressed myself1 and determined 
to go to the chapel4 ,i was enabled to  
do so1 though so weak when ,i went1 that
 walking the short distance to the      
chapel was an exertion to me4 ,i was    
enabled to preach this morning with as  
loud and strong a voice as usual1 and   
for the usual length of time4 ,after the
 morning meeting1 a medical friend      
called on me1 and entreated me not to   
preach again in the afternoon1 as it    
might greatly injure me4 ,i told him1   
that ,i should indeed consider it great 
presumption to do so1 had the ,lord not 
given me faith4 ,i preached again in the
 afternoon1 and this medical friend     
called again1 and said the same         
concerning the evening meeting4         
,nevertheless1 having faith1 ,i preached
 again in the evening4 ,after each      
meeting ,i became stronger1 which was a 
plain proof that the hand of ,god was in
 the matter4 ,after the third meeting ,i
 went immediately to bed1 considering   
that it would be presumption to try my  

strength needlessly4  ,february #bj4    
,the ,lord enabled me to rise early in  
the morning1 and to go to our usual     
prayer-meeting1 where ,i read1 spoke1   
and prayed4 ,afterwards ,i wrote four   
letters1 expounded the scriptures at    
home1 and attended the meeting again in 
the evening4 ,february #ba4 ,i attended 
the two meetings as usual1 preached in  
the evening1 and did my other work      
besides4 ,february #bb4 ,today ,i       
attended the meeting in the morning1    
walked afterwards six miles with two    
brethren to ,newton ,bushel1 and rode   
from thence to ,plymouth3 ,february #bc4
 ,i am now as well as ,i was before ,i  
broke the blood vessel4--,in relating   
the particulars of this circumstance ,i 
would earnestly warn every one who may  
read this1 not to imitate me in such a  
thing if he has no faith2 but if he has1
 it will1 as good coin1 most assuredly  
be honoured by ,god4 ,i could not say1  
that1 if such a thing should happen     
again1 ,i would act in the same way2 for

 when ,i have been not nearly so weak as
 when ,i had broken the blood-vessel1   
having no faith1 ,i did not preach2 yet 
if it were to please the ,lord to give  
me faith1 ,i might be able to do the    
same1 though even still weaker than at  
the time just spoken of4  ,about this   
time ,i repeatedly prayed with sick     
believers till they were restored4      
,unconditionally ,i asked the ,lord for 
the blessing of bodily health1 7a thing 
which ,i could not do now71 and almost  
always had the petition granted4 ,in    
some instances1 however1 the prayer was 
not answered4 ,in the same way1 whilst  
in ,london1 ,nov4 #ahbi1 in answer to my
 prayers1 ,i was immediately restored   
from a bodily infirmity under which ,i  
had been labouring for a long time1 and 
which has never returned since4 ,the way
 in which ,i now account for these facts
 is as follows4 ,it pleased the ,lord1  
,i think1 to give me in such cases      
something like the gift 7not grace7 of  
faith1 so that unconditionally ,i could 

ask and look for an answer4 ,the        
difference between the gift and the     
grace of faith seems to me this4        
,according to the gift of faith ,i am   
able to do a thing1 or believe that a   
thing will come to pass1 the not doing  
of which1 or the not believing of which 
would not be sin2 according to the grace
 of faith ,i am able to do a thing1 or  
believe that a thing will come to pass1 
respecting which ,i have the word of    
,god as the ground to rest upon1 and1   
therefore1 the not doing it1 or the not 
believing it would be sin4 ,for         
instance1 the gift of faith would be    
needed1 to believe that a sick person   
should be restored again though there is
 no human probability3 for there is no  
promise to that effect2 the grace of    
faith is needed to believe that the     
,lord will give me the necessaries of   
life1 if ,i first seek the kingdom of   
,god and ,his righteousness3 for there  
is a promise to that effect4 ,matt4 vi4 
,march #ah4 ,these two days we have not 

been able to purchase meat4 ,the sister 
in whose house we lodge gave us today   
part of her dinner4 ,we are still       
looking to ,jesus for deliverance4 ,we  
want money to pay the weekly rent and to
 buy provisions4 ,march #ai4 ,our       
landlady sent again of her meat for our 
dinner4 ,we have but a halfpenny left4  
,i feel myself very cold in asking for  
money3 still ,i hope for deliverance1   
though ,i do not see whence money is to 
come4 ,we were not able to buy bread    
today as usual4 ,march #bj4 ,this has   
been again a day of very great mercies4 
,in the morning we met round our        
breakfast which the ,lord had provided  
for us1 though we had not a single penny
 left4 ,the last half-penny was spent   
for milk4 ,we were then still looking to
 ,jesus for fresh supplies4 ,we both had
 no doubt that the ,lord would          
interfere4 ,i felt it a trial that ,i   
had but little earnestness in asking the
 ,lord1 and had this not been the case1 
perhaps we might have had our wants     

sooner supplied4 ,we have about ,l#g4 in
 the house2 but considering it no longer
 our own1 the ,lord kept us from taking 
of it1 with the view of replacing what  
we had taken1 as formerly ,i might have 
done4 ,the meat which was sent yesterday
 for our dinner1 was enough also for    
today4 ,thus the ,lord had provided     
another meal4 ,two sisters called upon  
us about noon1 who gave us two pounds of
 sugar1 one pound of coffee1 and two    
cakes of chocolate4 ,whilst they were   
with us1 a poor sister came and brought 
#as4 from herself1 and #bs4 #f;d4 from  
another poor sister4 ,our landlady also 
sent us again of her dinner1 and also a 
loaf4 ,our bread would scarcely have    
been enough for tea1 had the ,lord not  
thus graciously provided4 ,in the       
afternoon the same sister who brought   
the money1 brought us also from another 
sister1 one pound of butter and #bs41   
and from another sister #es4 ,thus the  
,lord graciously has again answered our 
feeble and cold breathings4 ,lord1      

strengthen our faith4  ,march #bi4 ,i   
went to ,shaldon this morning4 ,brother 
,craik has left for ,bristol for four   
weeks4 ,i think he will only return to  
take leave1 and that the ,lord will give
 him work there4 ,what a remarkable     
presentiment1 which came to pass1       
concerning my beloved brother and       
fellow-labourer6  ,april #d4 ,besides   
our own family1 there are now four      
visitors staying with us1 and we have   
but #bs4 ,april #e4 ,four pounds of     
cheese1 and one pound of butter were    
sent to us4 ,april #g4 ,anonymously was 
sent to us1 from ,plymouth1 a large ham1
 with two sovereigns tied in the corner 
of the cloth in which the ham was       
wrapped up4 ,thus the ,lord1 once more1 
in this our time of need1 when our      
expenses are double1 has graciously     
appeared for us4  ,april #h4 ,i have    
again felt much this day that           
,teignmouth is no longer my place1 and  
that ,i shall leave it4  ,i would       
observe that in ,august of the preceding

 year 7#ahca71 ,i began greatly to feel 
as if my work at ,teignmouth were done1 
and that ,i should go somewhere else4   
,on writing about this to a friend1 ,i  
was led1 from the answer ,i received1 to
 consider the matter more maturely1 and 
at last had it settled in this way1 that
 it was not likely to be of ,god1       
because1 for certain reasons1 ,i should 
naturally have liked to leave           
,teignmouth4 ,afterwards ,i felt quite  
comfortable in remaining there4 ,in the 
commencement of the year #ahcb ,i began 
again much to doubt whether ,teignmouth 
was my place1 or whether my gift was not
 much more that of going about from     
place to place1 seeking to bring        
believers back to the ,scriptures1 than 
to stay in one place and to labour as a 
pastor4 ,i thought so particularly      
whilst at ,plymouth1 in ,february4 ,on  
my return1 however1 ,i resolved to try  
whether it were not the will of ,god    
that ,i should still give myself to     
pastoral work among the brethren at     

,teignmouth2 and1 with more earnestness 
and faithfulness than ever1 ,i was      
enabled to attend to this work1 and was 
certainly much refreshed and blessed in 
it2 and ,i saw immediately blessings    
result from it4 ,this my experience     
seemed more than ever to settle me at   
,teignmouth4 ,but notwithstanding this1 
the impression that my work was done    
there1 came back after some time1 as the
 remark in my journal of ,april #hth    
shows1 and it became stronger and       
stronger4 ,there was one point          
remarkable in connexion with this4      
,wherever ,i went1 ,i preached with much
 more enjoyment and power than at       
,teignmouth1 the very reverse of which  
had been the case on my first going     
there4 ,moreover1 almost every where ,i 
had many more hearers than at           
,teignmouth1 and found the people       
hungering after food1 which1 generally  
speaking1 was no longer the case at     
,teignmouth4  ,april #aj4 ,i asked the  
,lord for a text1 but obtained none4 ,at

 last2 after having again much felt that
 ,teignmouth is not my place1 ,i was    
directed to ,isaiah li4 #i-aa4 ,april   
#aa4 ,felt again much that ,teignmouth  
will not much longer be my residence4   
,april #ab4 ,still feel the impression  
that ,teignmouth is no longer my place4 
,april #ac4 ,found a letter from        
,brother ,craik1 from ,bristol1 on my   
return from ,torquay1 where ,i had been 
to preach4 ,he invites me to come and   
help him4 ,it appears to me from what he
 writes1 that such places as ,bristol   
more suit my gifts4 ,o ,lord1 teach me6 
,i have felt this day more than ever1   
that ,i shall soon leave ,teignmouth4 ,i
 fear1 however1 there is much connected 
with it which savours of the flesh1 and 
that makes me fearful4 ,it seems to me  
as if ,i should shortly go to ,bristol1 
if the ,lord permit4 ,april #ad4 ,wrote 
a letter to ,brother ,craik1 in which ,i
 said ,i should come1 if ,i clearly saw 
it to be the ,lord's will4 ,have felt   
again very much today1 yea1 far more    

than ever1 that ,i shall soon leave     
,teignmouth4 ,at last ,i was pressed in 
spirit to determine that tomorrow ,i    
would tell the brethren so1 in order    
that by the result of this ,i might see 
more of the ,lord's mind2 and that1 at  
all events1 ,i might have their prayers1
 to be directed in this matter by the   
,lord4  ,april #ae4 ,lord's day4 ,this  
evening ,i preached again once more1 as 
fully as time would permit1 on the      
,lord's second coming4 ,after having    
done so1 ,i told the brethren what      
effect this doctrine had had upon me1 on
 first receiving it1 even to determine  
me to leave ,london1 and to preach      
throughout the kingdom2 but that the    
,lord had kept me chiefly at ,teignmouth
 for these two years and three months1  
and that it seemed to me now that the   
time was near when ,i should leave them4
 ,i reminded them of what ,i told them  
when they requested me to take the      
oversight of them1 that ,i could make no
 certain engagement1 but stay only so   

long with them as ,i should see it to be
 the ,lord's will to do so4 ,there was  
much weeping afterwards4 ,but ,i am now 
again in peace4 ,this would not have    
been the case1 had the matter not been  
of ,god4 ,i knew of no place to go to4  
,my mind was much directed to ,torquay1 
to preach there for a month or so1 and  
then to go further4 ,for though ,i had  
written that ,i would come to ,bristol1 
,i meant only to stay there for a few   
days1 and to preach a few times4  ,april
 #af4 ,this morning ,i am still in      
peace4 ,i am glad ,i have spoken to the 
brethren1 that they may be prepared1 in 
case the ,lord should take me           
away4--,having again little money1 and  
being about to leave ,teignmouth for    
several days1 ,i asked the ,lord for a  
fresh supply1 and within about four     
hours afterwards he sent me1 from six   
different quarters1 ,l#c4 #gs4 #f;d4 ,i 
left today for ,dartmouth1 where ,i     
preached in the evening4--,there was    
much weeping today among the saints at  

,teignmouth4 ,this is already a trial to
 me1 and it will be still more so should
 ,i actually leave4--,it is a most      
important work to go about and stir up  
the churches2 but it requires much      
grace1 much self-denial1 much saying    
over the same things1 and the greatest  
watchfulness and faithfulness1 in making
 use of one's time for prayer1          
meditation1 and reading the             
,scriptures4--,i had five answers to    
prayer today4 #a4 ,i awoke at five1 for 
which ,i had asked the ,lord last       
evening4 #b4 ,the ,lord removed from my 
dear wife an indisposition1 under which 
she had been suffering4 ,it would have  
been trying to me to have had to leave  
her in that state4 #c4 ,the ,lord sent  
us money4 #d4 ,there was a place vacant 
on the ,dartmouth coach1 which only     
passes through ,teignmouth4 #e4 ,this   
evening ,i was assisted in preaching1   
and my own soul refreshed4  ,april #ag4 
,i preached again at ,dartmouth4 ,april 
#ah4 ,i am still at ,dartmouth4 ,i wrote

 to ,brother ,craik1 that1 the ,lord    
willing1 ,i should be with him at       
,bristol on the #bast4 ,i preached again
 this evening1 with especial assistance1
 before a large congregation4 ,april    
#ai4 ,i awoke early1 and had a good     
while to myself for prayer and reading  
the ,word1 and left happy in spirit for 
,torquay1 where ,i preached in the      
evening with much help4 ,the brethren   
are sorry1 that1 on account of my going 
to ,bristol1 my regular weekly preaching
 will be given up there for a while4 ,i 
walked home after preaching1 and arrived
 at ,teignmouth at twelve o'clock4      
,april #bj4 ,i left this morning for    
,bristol4 ,i preached with little power 
7as to my own feeling7 in ,exeter1 from 
three till half-past four4 ,at five ,i  
left for ,taleford1 where ,i preached in
 the evening1 likewise with little      
power4 ,i was very tired in body1 and   
had had therefore little prayer4 ,but   
still1 in both places1 the believers    
seemed refreshed4 ,i went to bed at     

eleven1 very1 very tired4  ,april #ba4  
,this morning ,i rose a little before   
five1 and attended a prayer meeting from
 a quarter past five1 to a quarter past 
six4 ,i spoke for some time at the      
meeting4 ,afterwards ,i prayed and read 
again with some believers1 and likewise 
expounded the ,scriptures4 ,the ,bristol
 coach took me up about ten4 ,i was very
 faithless on the journey4  ,i did not  
speak a single word for ,christ1 and was
 therefore wretched in my soul4 ,this   
has shown me again my weakness4 ,though 
the ,lord had been so gracious to me    
yesterday1 in this particular1 both on  
my way from ,teignmouth to ,exeter1 and 
from ,exeter to ,taleford1 and had given
 me much encouragement1 in that ,he made
 my fellow-travellers either thankfully 
to receive the word1 or constrained them
 quietly to listen to the testimony2 yet
 ,i did not confess ,him today4 ,nor did
 ,i give away a single tract1 though ,i 
had my pockets full on purpose4 ,o      
wretched man that ,i am6  ,i would offer

 here a word of warning to my           
fellow-believers4 ,often the work of the
 ,lord itself may be a temptation to    
keep us from that communion with ,him   
which is so essential to the benefit of 
our own souls4--,on the #aith ,i had    
left ,dartmouth1 conversed a good deal  
that day1 preached in the evening1      
walked afterwards eight miles1 had only 
about five hours sleep1 traveled again  
the next day twenty-five miles1 preached
 twice1 and conversed very much besides1
 went to bed at eleven1 and rose before 
five4 ,all this shows that my body and  
spirit required rest1 and1 therefore1   
however careless about the ,lord's work 
,i might have appeared to my brethren1  
,i ought to have had a great deal of    
quiet time for prayer and reading the   
,word1 especially as ,i had a long      
journey before me that day1 and as ,i   
was going to ,bristol1 which in itself  
required much prayer4 ,instead of this1 
,i hurried to the prayer meeting after a
 few minutes' private prayer4 ,but let  

none think that public prayer will make 
up for closet communion4 ,then again1   
afterwards1 when ,i ought to have       
withdrawn myself1 as it were1 by force1 
from the company of beloved brethren and
 sisters1 and given my testimony for the
 ,lord 7and1 indeed1 it would have been 
the best testimony ,i could have given  
them71 by telling them that ,i needed   
secret communion with the ,lord3 ,i did 
not do so1 but spent the time1 till the 
coach came1 in conversation with them4  
,now1 however profitable in some        
respects it may have been to those with 
whom ,i was on that morning1 yet my own 
soul needed food2 and not having had it1
 ,i was lean1 and felt the effects of it
 the whole day1 and hence ,i believe it 
came that ,i was dumb on the coach4     
,april #bb4 ,this morning ,i preached at
 ,gideon ,chapel1 ,bristol4 ,though this
 sermon gave rise to false reports1 yet 
the ,lord was pleased to bless it to    
several2 and the false reports were     
likewise instrumental in bringing many  

individuals under the sound of the      
,word4 ,in the afternoon ,i preached at 
the ,pithay ,chapel4 ,this sermon was a 
blessing to many1 many souls2 and many  
were brought through it1 to come        
afterwards to hear ,brother ,craik and  
me4 ,among others it was the means of   
converting a young man who was a        
notorious drunkard1 and who was just    
again on his way to a public house1 when
 an acquaintance of his met him1 and    
asked him to go with him to hear a      
foreigner preach4 ,he did so2 and from  
that moment he was so completely        
altered1 that he never again went to a  
public house1 and was so happy in the   
,lord afterwards that he often neglected
 his supper1 from eagerness to read the 
,scriptures1 as his wife told me4 ,he   
died about five months afterwards4 ,this
 evening ,i was much instructed in      
hearing ,brother ,craik preach4 ,i am   
now fully persuaded that ,bristol is the
 place where the ,lord will have me to  
labour4  ,april #bc4 ,this evening ,i   

preached again with much assistance at  
,gideon4 ,i was very happy4 ,the ,lord  
made this testimony a blessing to       
several4 ,i feel that ,bristol is my    
place for a while4 ,the ,lord mercifully
 teach me6  ,april #bg4 ,it seems to    
,brother ,craik and myself the ,lord's  
will that we should go home next week1  
in order that in quietness1 without     
being influenced by what we see here1 we
 may more inquire into the ,lord's will 
concerning us4 ,it especially appears to
 us much more likely that we should come
 to a right conclusion among the        
brethren and sisters in ,devonshire1    
whose tears we shall have to witness1   
and whose entreaties to stay with them  
we shall have to hear1 than here in     
,bristol1 where we see only those who   
wish us to stay4 ,some asked me to stay 
with them while ,brother ,craik goes    
home4 ,but it seems better that we      
should both go4 ,i observe here1 it was 
evident that many preferred my beloved  
brother's gifts to my own2 yet1 as he   

would not come1 except ,i came with him3
 and as ,i knew that ,i also had been   
called by the ,lord for the ministry of 
the ,word1 ,i knew that ,i also should  
find my work in ,bristol1 and that      
though it might be a different one1 yet 
,i should fill up in some measure his   
lack1 whilst he supplied my             
deficiencies2 and that thus we might    
both be a benefit to the church and to  
the world in ,bristol4 ,the result has  
evidently confirmed this4 ,i am1        
moreover1 by the grace of ,god1         
strengthened to rejoice in my           
fellow-labourer's honour1 instead of    
envying him2 having1 in some measure1   
been enabled to enter into the meaning  
of that word3 ,a man can receive        
nothing1 except it be given him from    
above4  ,april #bh4 ,it still seems to  
us the ,lord's will that we should both 
leave soon1 to have quiet time for      
prayer concerning ,bristol4 ,this       
afternoon ,i felt the want of           
retirement1 finding afresh1 that the    

society of brethren cannot make up for  
communion with the ,lord4 ,i spent about
 three hours over the ,word and in      
prayer1 this evening1 which has been a  
great refreshment to my inner man4      
,april #bi4 ,i preached this morning    
with much outward power1 but with little
 inward enjoyment1 on ,rev4 iii4 #ad-bb4
 ,as it afterwards appeared1 that       
testimony was blessed to many1 though ,i
 lacked enjoyment in my own soul4 ,may  
this be an encouragement to those who   
labour in word and doctrine6 ,this      
afternoon ,brother ,craik preached in a 
vessel called the ,clifton ,ark1 fitted 
up for a chapel4 ,in the evening ,i     
preached in the same vessel4 ,these     
testimonies also ,god greatly honoured1 
and made them the means of afterwards   
bringing several1 who then heard us1 to 
our meeting places4 ,how did ,god bless 
us in everything we took into our hands6
 ,how was ,he with us1 and how did ,he  
help us1 thereby evidently showing that 
,he ,himself had sent us to this city6  

,brother ,craik preached this evening at
 ,gideon for the last time previous to  
our going4 ,the aisles1 the pulpit      
stairs1 and the vestry were filled1 and 
multitudes went away on account of the  
want of room4  ,april #cj4 ,it was most 
affecting to take leave of the dear     
children of ,god1 dozens pressing us to 
return soon1 many with tears in their   
eyes4 ,the blessing which the ,lord has 
given to our ministry1 seems to be very 
great4  ,we both see it fully the       
,lord's will to come here1 though we do 
not see under what circumstances4 ,a    
brother has promised to take ,bethesda  
,chapel for us1 and to be answerable for
 the payment of the rent3 so that thus  
we should have two large chapels4-,i    
saw1 again1 two instances today1 in     
which my preaching has been blessed4    
,may #a4 ,brother ,craik and ,i left    
this morning for ,devonshire4 ,may #b4  
,i preached this evening at             
,bishopsteignton1 and told the brethren1
 that1 the ,lord willing1 ,i should soon

 leave them4 ,may #c4 ,i saw several of 
the brethren today1 and felt so fully   
assured that it is the ,lord's will that
 ,i should go to ,bristol1 that ,i told 
them so4 ,this evening ,i had a meeting 
with the three deacons1 when ,i told    
them plainly about it2 asking them1 if  
they see any thing wrong in me          
concerning this matter1 to tell me of   
it4 ,they had nothing to say against it2
 yea1 though much wishing me to stay1   
they were convinced themselves that my  
going is of ,god4  ,may #d4 ,i saw again
 several brethren today1 and told them  
about my intention to go to ,bristol4   
,there is much sorrowing and sighing1   
but it does not move me in the least1   
though ,i desire to sympathize with     
them4 ,i am still fully persuaded that  
the ,lord will have us go to ,bristol4  
,may #e4 ,one other striking proof to my
 mind1 that my leaving ,teignmouth is of
 ,god1 is1 that some truly spiritual    
believers1 though they much wish me to  
stay1 themselves see that ,i ought to go

 to ,bristol4  ,may #g4 ,having received
 a letter from ,bristol on ,may #eth1 it
 was answered today in such a way that  
the ,lord may have another opportunity1 
to prevent our going thither1 if it be  
not of ,him4 ,especially we will not    
move a single stone out of the way in   
our own strength1 and much less still be
 guilty of a want of openness and       
plainness1 nor would we wish by such    
means to obtain ,bethesda chapel4  ,may 
#aa4 ,the ,lord seems to try us about   
,bristol4 ,there was reason to expect a 
letter the day before yesterday1 but    
none came2 also today there is no       
letter4 ,even this is very good for us4 
,yea1 ,i do wish most heartily that we  
may not have ,bethesda chapel1 if it be 
not good for us4  ,may #ae4 ,just when  
,i was in prayer concerning ,bristol1 ,i
 was sent for to come to ,brother       
,craik4 ,two letters had arrived from   
,bristol4 ,the brethren assembling at   
,gideon accept our offer to come under  
the conditions we have made1 i4e41 for  

the present to consider us only as      
ministering among them1 but not in any  
fixed pastoral relationship1 so that we 
may preach as we consider it to be      
according to the mind of ,god1 without  
reference to any rules among them2 that 
the pew-rents should be done away with  
and that we should go on1 respecting the
 supply of our temporal wants1 as in    
,devonshire4 ,we intend1 the ,lord      
willing1 to leave in about a week1      
though there is nothing settled         
respecting ,bethesda chapel4  ,may #af4 
,i preached for the last time at        
,bishopsteignton1 and took leave of the 
brethren4 ,may #ag4 ,i went to ,exmouth1
 and1 after preaching1 took leave of the
 brethren4 ,may #ba4 ,i began today to  
take leave of the brethren at           
,teignmouth1 calling on each of them4   
,in the evening ,i went over to ,shaldon
 to take leave of the brethren1 of whom 
brother ,craik has had the oversight4   
,it has been a trying day4 ,much weeping
 on the part of the saints4 ,were ,i not

 so fully persuaded that it is the will 
of ,god we should go to ,bristol1 ,i    
should have been hardly able to bear it4
  ,may #bb4 ,the brethren at ,shaldon   
and ,teignmouth say1 that they expect us
 soon back again4 ,as far as ,i         
understand the way in which ,god deals  
with his children1 this seems very      
unlikely4 ,in every respect we have seen
 the ,lord's goodness1 and all proves   
that it is ,his will that we should go  
to ,bristol4 ,this full persuasion has  
helped me to withstand all the tears of 
the saints4 ,towards the evening the    
,lord1 after repeated prayer1 gave me   
,col4 i4 #ba-bc1 as a text1 for the last
 word of exhortation4 ,it seemed to me  
best to speak as little as possible     
about myself1 and as much as possible   
about ,christ4 ,i scarcely alluded to   
our separation1 and only commended      
myself and the brethren1 in the         
concluding prayer1 to the ,lord4 ,the   
parting scenes are very trying1 but my  
full persuasion is1 that the separation 

is of the ,lord4  ,may #bc4 ,my beloved 
wife1 ,mr4 ,groves1 my father-in-law1   
and ,i left this morning for ,exeter4   
,dear brother ,craik intends to follow  
us tomorrow4  ,review of the time since 
,i left ,london1 up to my removal from  
,teignmouth4  ,i4 ,all this time the    
,lord never allowed me to regret the    
step ,i had taken1 in separating from   
the ,society4  ,,ii4 ,the results have  
most abundantly shown1 that it was of   
,god2 for1 by ,his help1 #a1 ,i have not
 lost in truth or grace since4 #b1 ,i   
have been in peace concerning the       
matter4 #c1 the ,lord made it a blessing
 to many souls4  ,,iii4 ,during this    
period it pleased the ,lord1 to convert1
 through my instrumentality1 many souls 
at ,teignmouth1 ,exmouth1               
,bishopsteignton1 ,exeter1 ,chudleigh1  
in the neighbourhood of ,barnstaple1 at 
,chard1 and elsewhere4 ,the church at   
,teignmouth increased from eighteen to  
fifty-one4  ,,iv4 ,the ,lord most       
graciously supplied all my temporal     

wants during this period1 so that ,i    
lacked no good thing4  ,v4 ,we had      
unexpectedly received1 just before we   
left ,teignmouth1 about ,l#ae41 else we 
should not have been able to defray all 
the expenses connected with leaving1    
traveling1 c4 ,by this also the ,lord   
showed ,his mind concerning our going to
 ,bristol4  ,,vi4 ,during these two     
years and five months1 since ,i left    
,london1 ,i have sinned in many         
respects1 though walking1 it may be1 in 
the eyes of the brethren1 very near to  
,god4 ,indeed1 my confession concerning 
this time also is1 that ,i have been an 
unprofitable servant4  ,the following   
record will now show to the believing   
reader how far1 what ,i have said       
concerning my persuasion1 that it was   
the will of ,god that we should go to   
,bristol1 has been proved by facts4     
,may #beth1 #ahcb4 ,this evening we     
arrived in ,bristol4 ,may #bg4 ,this    
morning we received a sovereign1 sent to
 us by a sister residing in ,devonshire1

 which we take as an earnest that the   
,lord will provide for us here also4    
,may #bh4 ,when we were going to speak  
to the brethren1 who manage the temporal
 affairs of ,gideon chapel1 about giving
 up the pew-rents1 having all the seats 
free1 and receiving the free-will       
offerings through a box1 a matter which 
was not quite settled on their part1 as 
brother ,craik and ,i had thought2 we   
found that the ,lord had so graciously  
ordered this matter for us1 that there  
was not the least objection on the part 
of these brethren4  ,june #d4 ,for      
several days we have been looking about 
for lodgings1 but finding none plain and
 cheap enough1 we were led to make this 
also a subject of earnest prayer2 and   
now1 immediately afterwards1 the ,lord  
has given us such as are suitable4 ,they
 are the plainest and cheapest we can   
find1 but still too good for servants of
 ,jesus1 as our ,master had not where to
 lay ,his head4 ,we pay only #ahs4 a    
week for two sitting-rooms and three    

bedrooms1 coals and attendance4 ,it was 
particularly difficult to find cheap    
furnished lodgings1 having five rooms in
 the same house1 which we need1 as      
brother ,craik and we live together4    
,how good is the ,lord to have thus     
appeared for us1 in answer to prayer1   
and what an encouragement to commit     
every thing to ,him in prayer6  ,june   
#e4 ,today we had already a testimony of
 a sinner having been converted by      
brother ,craik's instrumentality1 on the
 first ,lord's day in ,april1 simply    
through hearing the text read4 ,this    
aged sister lived eleven years          
afterwards1 during which time her walk  
was according to the profession she     
made4 ,she fell asleep in #ahdc4 ,june  
#g4 ,we have daily fresh encouragements1
 and fresh proofs that our being here is
 of ,god4 ,june #af4 ,we saw another    
instance of conversion through brother  
,craik's instrumentality4  ,june #be4   
,today it was finally settled to take   
,bethesda chapel for a twelvemonth1 on  

condition that a brother at once paid   
the rent1 with the understanding1 that1 
if the ,lord shall bless our labours in 
that place1 so that believers are       
gathered together in fellowship1 he     
expects them to help him2 but1 if not1  
that he will pay all4 ,this was the only
 way in which we could take the chapel2 
for we could not think it to be of ,god 
to have had this chapel1 though there   
should have been every prospect of      
usefulness1 if it had made us in any way
 debtors4 ,we had tried to obtain a     
cheaper meeting-place1 but could find   
none large enough to accommodate the    
hearers4  ,july #f4 ,today we commenced 
preaching at ,bethesda ,chapel4 ,it was 
a good day4 ,july #ac4 ,today we heard  
of the first cases of cholera in        
,bristol4 ,july #af4 ,this evening1 from
 six to nine o'clock1 we had appointed  
for conversing at the vestry1 one by    
one1 with individuals1 who wished to    
speak to us about their souls4 ,there   
were so many1 that we were engaged from 

six till twenty minutes past ten4       
,these meetings we have continued ever  
since twice a week1 or once a week1 or  
once a fortnight1 or once a month1 as   
our strength and time allowed it1 or as 
they seemed needed4 ,we have found them 
beneficial in the following respects3   
#a4 ,many persons1 on account of        
timidity1 would prefer coming at an     
appointed time to the vestry to converse
 with us1 to calling on us in our own   
house4 #b4 ,the very fact of appointing 
a time for seeing people1 to converse   
with them in private concerning the     
things of eternity1 has brought some1   
who1 humanly speaking1 never would have 
called on us under other circumstances2 
yea1 it has brought even those who1     
though they thought they were concerned 
about the things of ,god1 yet were      
completely ignorant2 and thus we have   
had an opportunity of speaking to them4 
#c4 ,these meetings have also been a    
great encouragement to ourselves in the 
work1 for often1 when we thought that   

such and such expositions of the ,word  
had done no good at all1 it was1 through
 these meetings1 found to be the        
reverse2 and likewise1 when our hands   
were hanging down1 we have been afresh  
encouraged to go forward in the work of 
the ,lord1 and to continue sowing the   
seed in hope1 by seeing at these        
meetings fresh cases1 in which the ,lord
 had condescended to use us as          
instruments1 particularly as in this way
 instances have sometimes occurred in   
which individuals have spoken to us     
about the benefit which they derived    
from our ministry1 not only a few months
 before1 but even as long as two1 three1
 and four years before4  ,for the above 
reasons ,i would particularly recommend 
to other servants of ,christ1 especially
 to those who live in large towns1 if   
they have not already introduced a      
similar plan1 to consider whether it may
 not be well for them also to set apart 
such times for seeing inquirers4 ,those 
meetings1 however1 require much prayer1 

to be enabled to speak aright1 to all   
those who come1 according to their      
different need2 and one is led          
continually to feel that one is not     
sufficient of one's self for these      
things1 but that our sufficiency can be 
alone of ,god4 ,these meetings also have
 been by far the most wearing out part  
of all our work1 though at the same time
 the most refreshing4  ,july #ah4 ,today
 ,i spent the whole morning in the      
vestry1 to procure a quiet season4 ,this
 has now for some time been the only    
way1 on account of the multiplicity of  
engagements1 to make sure of time for   
prayer1 reading the ,word and           
meditation4 ,july #ai4 ,i spent from    
half-past nine till one in the vestry1  
and had real communion with the ,lord4  
,the ,lord be praised1 who has put it   
into my mind to use the vestry for a    
place of retirement6  ,august #e4 ,when 
all our money was gone today1 the ,lord 
again graciously supplied our wants4    
,august #f4 ,this afternoon1 from two   

till after six1 brother ,craik and ,i   
spent in the vestry1 to see the         
inquirers4 ,we have had again1 in seeing
 several instances of blessing upon our 
labours1 abundant reason brought before 
us to praise the ,lord for having sent  
us to ,bristol4  ,august #ac1 #ahcb4    
,this evening one brother and four      
sisters united with brother ,craik and  
me in church fellowship at ,bethesda1   
without any rules1 desiring only to act 
as the ,lord shall be pleased to give us
 light through ,his word4  ,august #ad4 
,this day we set apart for prayer       
concerning the cholera1 and had three   
meetings4  ,august #ag4 ,this morning1  
from six to eight1 we had a prayer      
meeting at ,gideon1 on account of the   
cholera4 ,between two and three hundred 
people were present4 ,we continued these
 meetings every morning1 as long as the 
cholera raged in ,bristol1 and          
afterwards changed them into prayer     
meetings for the church at large1 so    
that we had them for about four months4 

,august #bd4 ,this morning a sister in  
the ,lord1 within fifty yards of our    
lodging1 was taken ill in the cholera1  
and died this afternoon4 ,her husband1  
also a believer1 has been attacked1 and 
may be near death4 ,the ravages of this 
disease are becoming daily more and more
 fearful4 ,we have reason to believe    
that great numbers die daily in this    
city4 ,who may be the next1 ,god alone  
knows4 ,i have never realised so much   
the nearness of death4 ,except the ,lord
 keep us this night1 we shall be no more
 in the land of the living tomorrow4    
,just now1 ten in the evening1 the      
funeral bell is ringing1 and has been   
ringing the greater part of this        
evening4 ,it rings almost all the day4  
,into ,thine hands1 ,o ,lord1 ,i commend
 myself6 ,here is ,thy poor worthless   
child6 ,if this night ,i should be taken
 in the cholera1 my only hope and trust 
is in the blood of ,jesus ,christ1 shed 
for the remission of all my many sins4  
,i have been thoroughly washed in it1   

and the righteousness of ,god covers    
me4--,as yet there have not been any of 
the saints1 among whom brother ,craik   
and ,i labour1 taken in the cholera4    
,only one of them fell asleep afterwards
 in consequence of this disease4 ,i     
would observe1 that though brother      
,craik and ,i visited many cholera      
cases1 by day and by night1 yet the     
,lord most graciously preserved us and  
our families from it4  ,september #ag4  
,this morning the ,lord1 in addition to 
all ,his other mercies1 has given us a  
little girl1 who1 with her mother1 are  
doing well4  ,september #ba4 ,on account
 of the birth of our little one1 and    
brother ,craik's intended marriage1 it  
is needful that we change our lodgings1 
as they will now be too small for us1   
because we shall want one room more4    
,just when we were thinking about this1 
the house belonging to ,gideon chapel1  
which had been let for three years1 was 
unexpectedly given up by the tenant1 and
 it was now offered to us by the church4

 ,we said we could not think of going   
into it1 as we had no furniture1 and no 
money to buy any4 ,the brother who      
proposed our going into that house1     
however1 replied that the brethren would
 gladly furnish it for us1 to which we  
objected1 fearing it would burthen them4
 ,when1 however1 the matter was         
repeatedly mentioned1 and when it was   
particularly expressed that it would be 
a pleasure to the brethren to furnish   
the house1 we began to consider the     
subject in prayer1 and we saw no        
scriptural objection to accept this     
kindness1 provided the furniture was    
very plain4 ,this was promised4 ,the    
house was furnished1 yet the love of the
 brethren had done it more expensively  
than we wished it4  ,september #bc4     
,today an individual desired publicly to
 return thanks to the ,lord1 for having 
been supported under the loss of a      
child1 mother1 brother1 and wife1 in the
 cholera1 within one month4  ,september 
#be4 ,last night brother ,craik and ,i  

were called out of bed to a poor woman  
ill in the cholera4 ,she was suffering  
intensely4 ,we never saw a case so      
distressing4 ,we could hardly say any   
thing to her on account of her loud     
cries4 ,i felt as if the cholera was    
coming upon me4 ,we commended ourselves 
into the hands of the ,lord when we came
 home1 and ,he mercifully preserved us4 
,the poor woman died today4  ,oct4 #a4  
,a meeting for inquirers this afternoon 
from two to five4 ,many more are        
convinced of sin through brother        
,craik's preaching than my own4 ,this   
circumstance led me to inquire into the 
reasons1 which are probably these3--#a4 
,that brother ,craik is more spiritually
 minded than ,i am4 #b4 ,that he prays  
more earnestly for the conversion of    
sinners than ,i do4 #c4 ,that he more   
frequently addresses sinners1 as such1  
in his public ministrations1 than ,i    
do4--,this led me to more frequent and  
earnest prayer for the conversion of    
sinners1 and to address them more       

frequently as such4 ,the latter had     
never been intentionally left undone1   
but it had not been so frequently       
brought to my mind as to that of brother
 ,craik4 ,since then1 the cases in which
 it has pleased the ,lord to use me as  
an instrument of conversion have been   
quite as many as those in which brother 
,craik has been used4 ,may the ,lord be 
pleased to use this as a means to lead  
any of ,his servants1 who may not have  
acted according to these two last       
points1 to seek to do so1 and may ,he   
graciously enable me to do so more      
abundantly6  ,october #c4 ,this day we  
set apart as a day of thanksgiving1 the 
cholera having decreased4 ,oct4 #e4     
,prayer meeting this morning as usual4  
,the cholera is very much decreasing1   
and the number at our morning prayer    
meetings likewise4--,hundreds of people 
were stirred up at that time1 but many  
of them1 when the judgment of ,god had  
passed away1 cared no longer about their
 souls4 ,yet a goodly number1 who were  

first led through the instrumentality of
 the cholera to seek the ,lord1 are now 
breaking bread with us1 and are walking 
in the fear of the ,lord4 ,how merciful 
in its results has this heavy judgment  
been to many6  ,january #d1 #ahcc4 ,this
 morning we received letters from       
,bagdad4 ,the missionary brethren there 
invite brother ,craik and me to come and
 join them in their labours4 ,the       
invitation was accompanied by drafts to 
the amount of ,l#bjj41 for our traveling
 expenses4 ,what wilt ,thou have me to  
do1 gracious ,lord8 ,i do not know what 
may be the ,lord's mind4 ,there are     
points which ought to be much considered
 and prayed over3 ,there are ,german    
villages not very far from ,bagdad1     
where ,i might labour2 upon our going1  
that of certain other individuals may   
depend2 the brethren at ,bagdad are of  
one mind respecting our going out2 good 
may be done on the way2 the going out   
without any visible support from a      
society1 simply trusting in the ,lord   

for the supply of our temporal wants1   
would be a testimony for ,him2 ,i have  
had for years a feeling as if one day ,i
 should go out as a missionary to the   
heathen or ,mahomedans2 and lastly1 the 
hands of the brethren at ,bagdad may be 
strengthened2 these are the points1     
which must appear of no sufficient      
weight in comparison with the importance
 of our work here1 before ,i can        
determine not to go4  ,january #e4 ,i   
considered with brother ,craik about    
going to ,bagdad4 ,we see nothing       
clearly4 ,if the ,lord will have me to  
go1 here ,i am4 ,january #g4 ,i spent   
again some time in prayer1 respecting   
our going to ,bagdad1 and examined more 
fully into it4 ,january #h4 ,i had from 
half-past five till eight this morning  
to myself in prayer and reading the     
,word4 ,i prayed then1 and repeatedly   
besides this day1 respecting our going  
to ,bagdad4 ,i wrote also a letter to   
some believers at and near ,barnstaple1 
to ask their prayers concerning this    

matter4 ,i do not see more clearly than 
,i did before4 ,january #i4 ,i again    
asked the ,lord concerning ,bagdad1 but 
see nothing clearly respecting it4 ,i   
told the ,lord ,i should stay at my     
post1 unless ,he ,himself should most   
evidently take me away1 and ,i did not  
feel afterwards my remaining here to be 
against ,his will4 ,january #ad4 ,i feel
 more and more satisfied that it is not 
of the ,lord that ,i should go to       
,bagdad4 ,january #ai4 ,for some days   
past ,i have been reading brother       
,groves' journal of his residence at    
,bagdad1 both for the sake of           
information respecting his position     
there1 and also1 if it please the ,lord1
 that ,he may use this as a means to    
show me clearly wether ,i should go or  
stay4 ,blessed be ,his name that ,i have
 no desire of my own in this matter6    
,forty-seven years have since passed    
away1 and ,i think ,i may say this day  
still1 according to the best of my      
knowledge1 ,i had no desire of my own in

 this matter2 but ,i never saw it to be 
the ,lord's will to leave the work which
 ,he ,himself had so evidently given me4
  ,february #i4 ,i read a part of       
,franke's life4 ,the ,lord graciously   
help me to follow him1 as far as he     
followed ,christ4 ,the greater part of  
the ,lord's people whom we know in      
,bristol are poor1 and if the ,lord were
 to give us grace to live more as this  
dear man of ,god did1 we might draw much
 more than we have as yet done out of   
our ,heavenly ,father's bank1 for our   
poor brethren and sisters4  ,may #bg4   
,today the two churches1 assembling at  
,gideon and ,bethesda1 met together at  
tea4--,these meetings we have often     
repeated1 and found them profitable on  
several accounts4 #a4 ,they give a      
testimony to the world of the love of   
the brethren1 by rich and poor meeting  
thus together to partake of a meal4 #b4 
,such meetings may be instrumental in   
uniting the saints more and more        
together4 #c4 ,they give us a sweet     

foretaste of our meeting together at the
 marriage supper of the ,lamb4--,at     
these meetings we pray and sing         
together1 and any brother has an        
opportunity to speak what may tend to   
the edification of the rest4  ,may #bh4 
,this morning1 whilst sitting in my     
room1 the distress of several brethren  
and sisters was brought to my mind1 and 
,i said to myself1 ,oh that it might    
please the ,lord to give me means to    
help them6 ,about an hour afterwards ,i 
received ,l#fj4 from a brother1 whom up 
to this day ,i never saw1 and who then  
lived1 as he does still1 at a distance  
of several thousand miles4 ,this shows  
how the ,lord can provide in any way for
 ,his people1 and that ,he is not       
confined to places4 ,oh that my heart   
might overflow with gratitude to the    
,lord6 ,since the first edition was     
printed1 ,i have become personally      
acquainted with the donor4  ,may #bi4   
,review of the last twelve months1 since
 we have been in ,bristol1 as it regards

 the fruits of our labours4 #a4 ,it has 
pleased the ,lord to gather a church1   
through our instrumentality1 at         
,bethesda1 which is increased to #fj in 
number1 and there have been added to    
,gideon church #di2 therefore the total 
number of those added to us within the  
year1 has been #aji4 #b4 ,there have    
been converted through our              
instrumentality1 so far as we have heard
 and can judge respecting the           
individuals1 #fe4 #c4 ,many backsliders 
have been reclaimed1 and many of the    
children of ,god have been encouraged   
and strengthened in the way of truth4   
,what clear proofs that we were not     
suffered to be mistaken1 as it regards  
our coming to ,bristol4  ,june #ab4 ,i  
felt1 this morning1 that we might do    
something for the souls of those poor   
boys and girls1 and grown-up or aged    
people1 to whom we have daily given     
bread for some time past1 in            
establishing a school for them1 reading 
the ,scriptures to them1 and speaking to

 them about the ,lord4 ,as far as ,i see
 at present1 it appears well to me to   
take a place in the midst of those poor 
streets near us1 to collect the children
 in the morning about eight1 giving them
 each a piece of bread for breakfast1   
and then to teach them to read1 or to   
read the ,scriptures to them1 for about 
an hour and a half4 ,afterwards the     
aged1 or grown-up people1 may have their
 appointed time1 when bread may be given
 to them1 and the ,scriptures read and  
expounded to them1 for1 perhaps1 half an
 hour4 ,about similar things ,i have now
 and then thought these two             
years4--,there was bread given to about 
#cj or #dj persons today2 and though the
 number should increase1 in the above   
way1 to #bjj or more1 surely our        
gracious and rich ,lord can give us     
bread for them also4 ,no sooner had     
these thoughts arisen1 and ,i           
communicated them to my dear brother    
,craik1 than ,i was also directed to a  
place where the people may be assembled1

 holding comfortably #aej children4 ,we 
went about it1 and may have it at the   
rent of #ajl41 yearly4 ,the ,lord       
directed us1 also1 to an aged brother as
 a teacher1 and he gladly accepted of   
our offer4 ,surely1 this matter seems to
 be of ,god4 ,moreover1 as ,i have just 
now a good deal of money left of the    
#fjl41 we have wherewith to begin2 and  
if it be the ,lord's will1 and if ,he   
will accept it1 ,i am willing to lay out
 at once #bjl4 of it in this way1 yea1  
all that is left1 if ,he will but speak2
 and1 by the time that this is gone1 ,he
 can send more4 ,o ,lord1 if this matter
 be of ,thee1 then prosper it6 ,this    
desire was not carried out4 ,as far as  
,i remember1 the chief obstacle in the  
way was a pressure of work coming upon  
brother ,craik and me just about that   
time4 ,shortly after1 the number of the 
poor who came for bread increased to    
between #fj and #hj a day1 whereby our  
neighbours were molested1 as the beggars
 were lying about in troops in the      

streets1 on account of which we were    
obliged to tell them no longer to come  
for bread4 ,but though1 at this time1   
this matter was not carried out1 the    
thought was1 from time to time1 revived 
and strengthened in my mind1 and it     
ultimately issued in the formation of   
the ,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution1
 and in the establishment of the        
,orphan-,houses4  ,june #bb4 ,a brother 
sent a hat to brother ,craik1 and one to
 me1 as a token of his love and         
gratitude1 like a thank-offering1 as he 
says4 ,this is now the fourth hat which 
the ,lord has kindly sent me            
successively1 whenever1 or even before1 
,i needed one4 ,between ,august #aith   
and #bgth was sent to us1 by several    
individuals1 a considerable quantity of 
fruit4 ,how very kind of the ,lord1 not 
merely to send us the necessaries of    
life1 but even such things as1 on       
account of the weakness of our bodies1  
or the want of appetite1 we might have  
desired6 ,thus the ,lord has sent wine  

or porter when we required it2 or1 when 
there was want of appetite1 and1 on     
account of the poverty of our brethren1 
we should not have considered it right  
to spend money upon such things1 ,he has
 kindly sent fowls1 game1 c41 to suit   
our appetite4 ,we have1 indeed1 not     
served a hard ,master4 ,i am quite      
ashamed when ,i still1 sometimes1 find  
my heart dissatisfied1 or1 at least1 not
 grateful as it ought to be4  ,december 
#ag4 ,this evening brother ,craik and ,i
 took tea with a family1 of whom five   
have been brought to the knowledge of   
the ,lord through our instrumentality4  
,when we took tea with them again1 about
 a twelvemonth afterwards1 the number   
had increased to seven4 ,as an          
encouragement to brethren who may desire
 to preach the ,gospel in a language not
 their own1 ,i would mention1 that the  
first member of this family who was     
converted1 came merely out of curiosity 
to hear my foreign accent1 some words   
having been mentioned to her which ,i   

did not pronounce properly4 ,scarcely   
had she entered the chapel1 when she was
 led to see herself a sinner4 ,her      
intention had been1 to stay only a few  
minutes4 ,but she felt herself as if    
bound to the seat whilst ,i was         
speaking1 and remained to the close of  
the meeting4 ,she then went hastily     
home1 instead of pursuing her pleasures1
 washed the paint off her face1 stayed  
at home that ,lord's day1 till the      
meeting began again1 and from that day  
was truly converted4 ,having found the  
,lord1 she entreated her brothers and   
sisters to go and hear the ,gospel      
preached1 who1 in doing so1 were        
likewise converted4 ,may my dear        
missionary brethren always be mindful   
that the ,lord can bless a few broken   
sentences1 however badly the words are  
pronounced1 as a means in the conversion
 of sinners6  ,december #ca1 #ahcc4 ,in 
looking over my journal1 ,i find3--,i4  
,that at least #bfj persons 7according  
to the number of names we have marked   

down1 but there have been many more17   
have come to converse with us about the 
concerns of their souls4 ,out of these1 
#aec have been added to us in fellowship
 these last eighteen months1 #fj of whom
 have been brought to the knowledge of  
the ,lord through our instrumentality4  
,besides these #fj1 five have fallen    
asleep before they were received into   
communion4 ,in addition to these1 there 
are many among the inquirers and        
candidates for fellowship1 whom we have 
reason to believe ,god has given to us  
as seals to our ministry in this city4  
,some also were converted through our   
instrumentality who are in fellowship   
with other churches in this city4  ,,ii4
 ,in looking over the ,lord's dealings  
with me as to temporal things1 ,i find  
that ,he has sent me1 during the past   
year1--  #a4 ,in freewill offerings     
through the boxes1 as my part ,l#aeb    
#ads4 #e #a_/d;d4  #b4 ,presents in     
money given to me ,l#be #as4 #c;d4  #c4 
,presents in clothes and provisions     

worth at least ,l#bj #js4 #j;d4         
,altogether from the brethren in        
,bristol ,l#aig #aes4 #h #a_/d;d4  #d4  
,a brother sent me1 from a distance of  
several thousand miles ,l#fj #js4 #j;d4 
#e4 ,we live free of rent1 which is     
worth for our part ,l#aj #js4 #j;d4     
,totaling ,l#bfg #aes #h #a_/d;d4  ,it  
is just now four years since ,i first   
began to trust in the ,lord alone for   
the supply of my temporal wants4 ,my    
little all ,i then had1 at most worth   
#ajjl4 a year1 ,i gave up to the ,lord1 
having then nothing left but about #el4 
,the ,lord greatly honoured this little 
sacrifice1 and ,he gave me1 in return1  
not only as much as ,i had given up1 but
 considerably more4 ,for during the     
first year1 ,he sent me already1 in one 
way or other1 7including what came to me
 through family connexion7 about #acjl4 
,during the second year1 #aeal4 #ahs4   
#h;d4 ,during the third year1 #aiel4    
#cs4 ,during this year1 #bfgl4 #aes4 #h 
#a_/d;d4 ,the following points require  

particular notice3--#a4 ,during the last
 three years and three months ,i never  
have asked any one for any thing2 but1  
by the help of the ,lord1 ,i have been  
enabled at all times to bring my wants  
to ,him1 and ,he graciously has supplied
 them all4 ,and thus1 the ,lord helping 
me1 ,i hope to be enabled to go on to   
the last moment of my life4 #b4 ,at the 
close of each of these four years1      
though my income has been comparatively 
great1 ,i have had only a few shillings1
 or nothing at all left2 and thus it is 
also today1 by the help of ,god4 #c4    
,during the last year a considerable    
part of my income has come from a       
distance of several thousand miles1 from
 a brother whom ,i never saw4 #d4 ,since
 we have been obliged to discontinue the
 giving away bread to about #ej poor    
people every day1 on account of our     
neighbours1 our income has not been1    
during the second part of this year1    
nearly so great1 scarcely one-half as   
much1 as during the first part of it2 as

 if the ,lord would thereby show us that
 when the calls upon us are many1 ,he is
 able to send in accordingly4 ,observe  
this6  ,january #a1 #ahcd4 ,it seemed   
well to brother ,craik and me1 to have  
an especial public meeting for          
thanksgiving to the ,lord1 for ,his many
 mercies towards us since we have been  
in ,bristol1 and for the great success  
which it has pleased ,him to grant to   
our labours2 and also for confession of 
our sinfulness and unworthiness1 and to 
entreat ,him to continue ,his goodness  
towards us4 ,accordingly we met last    
evening1 and continued together from    
seven o'clock till half-past twelve4    
,about four hundred individuals1 or     
more1 met with us on the occasion4      
,january #c4 ,this evening1 from six to 
a quarter past ten1 we conversed with   
inquirers4 ,after we had seen twelve1 we
 had to send away six4 ,there were      
several fresh cases of conversion among 
them4 ,the work of the ,lord is still   
going on among us4 ,one of the          

individuals1 who has lately been brought
 to the knowledge of the truth1 used to 
say in his unconverted state1 when he   
was tempted not to go to the chapel1--,i
 will go2 the ,lord may bless me one    
day1 and soften my hard heart4 --,his   
expectation has not come to nothing4    
,january #i4 ,brother ,craik and ,i have
 preached during these eighteen months1 
once a month1 at ,brislington1 a village
 near ,bristol1 but have not seen any   
fruit of our labours there4 ,this led   
me1 today1 very earnestly to pray to the
 ,lord for the conversion of sinners in 
that place4 ,i was also1 in the chapel1 
especially led to pray again about this1
 and asked the ,lord in particular that 
,he would be pleased to convert1 at     
least1 one soul this evening1 that we   
might have a little encouragement4 ,i   
preached with much help1 and ,i hope    
there has been good done this evening4  
,the ,lord did according to my request4 
,there was1 that evening1 a young man   
brought to the knowledge of the truth4  

,january #ac4 ,the ,lord verified in our
 experience the truths which ,i had     
preached last evening in speaking on    
,hast thou not made an hedge about him1 
and about his house1 and about all that 
he hath1 on every side8 ,job i4 #aj4    
,thieves attempted to break into ,gideon
 ,chapel4 ,they had broken it open1 but 
were either smitten with blindness1 so  
as not to see a certain door which had  
been left unlocked1 or were disturbed   
before accomplishing their design2 for  
there was nothing missing4  ,january    
#ad4 ,i was greatly tried by the        
difficulty of fixing upon a text1 from  
which to preach1 on the morning of      
,october #bj1 and at last preached      
without enjoyment4 ,today ,i heard of a 
,,ninth instance in which this very     
sermon has been blessed4 ,may my        
brethren in the ministry of the ,word be
 encouraged by this to go quietly1 yet  
prayerfully1 forward in the work of the 
,lord6  ,january #ca4 ,this evening a   
,dorcas ,society was formed among the   

sisters in communion with us1 but not   
according to the manner in which we     
found one when we came to ,bristol2 for 
as we have dismissed all teachers from  
the ,sunday ,school who were not        
believers1 so now believing females only
 will meet together to make clothes for 
the poor4 ,the being mixed up with      
unbelievers had not only proved a       
barrier to spiritual conversation among 
the sisters1 but must have been also    
injurious to both parties in several    
respects4 ,one sister1 now united to us 
in fellowship1 acknowledged that the    
being connected with the ,dorcas        
,society1 previous to her conversion1   
had been1 in a measure1 the means of    
keeping her in security2 as she thought1
 that1 by helping on such like things1  
she might gain heaven at last4 ,oh that 
the saints in faithful love1 according  
to the word of ,god1 7#b ,cor4 vi4      
#ad-ah7 might be more separated1 in all 
spiritual matters1 from unbelievers1 and
 not be unequally yoked together with   

them6  ,february #ab4 ,i prayed little1 
read little of the ,word1 and laboured  
little to day4 ,on the whole an         
unprofitable day4 ,may the ,lord in     
mercy give me fervency of spirit6       
,february #ai4 ,brother ,craik preached 
this evening on ,mark iv4 #cj-da1 and   
was enabled to give out precious truths4
 ,oh that ,i did feed more upon them6   
,for several weeks ,i have had very     
little real communion with the ,lord4 ,i
 long for it4 ,i am cold4 ,i have little
 love to the ,lord4 ,but ,i am not1 yea1
 ,i cannot be satisfied with such a     
state of heart4 ,oh that once more ,i   
might be brought to fervency of spirit1 
and that thus it might continue with me 
forever6 ,i long to go home that ,i     
maybe with the ,lord1 and that ,i may   
love ,him with all my heart4 ,i fear    
that the ,lord will chastise me at the  
time of my dear wife's confinement4     
,lord ,jesus1 take ,thy miserable sinful
 servant soon to ,thyself1 that ,i may  
serve ,thee better6 ,within the last    

week ,i have repeatedly set out1 as it  
were1 afresh2 but soon1 very soon1 all  
has come again to nothing4 ,the ,lord   
alone can help me4 ,oh that it might    
please ,him to bring me into a more     
spiritual state6  ,february #bj4 ,by the
 mercy of ,god ,i was today melted into 
tears on account of my state of heart4  
,oh that it might please the ,lord to   
bring me into a more spiritual state6   
,february #ba4 ,through the help of the 
,lord ,i am rather in a better state of 
heart than for some time past4--,i was  
led this morning to form a plan for     
establishing1 upon scriptural           
principles1 an ,institution for the     
spread of the ,gospel at home and       
abroad4 ,i trust this matter is of      
,god4--,this evening we had again1 from 
six to half-past ten1 a meeting with    
inquirers4 ,the work of the ,lord is    
going on among us as much as ever4 ,oh  
that our hearts might overflow with     
gratitude6 ,even after we were worn out 
to the utmost1 we could not see all1 but

 had to send away several individuals4  
,february #be4 ,the inquiries were so   
many yesterday1 that though we conversed
 more than four hours with them1 we had 
to appoint another meeting for today1   
and saw again several from two till     
five4 ,i was led again this day to pray 
about the forming of a new ,missionary  
,institution1 and felt still more       
confirmed that we should do so4  ,some  
readers may ask why we formed a new     
,institution for the spread of the      
,gospel1 and why we did not unite with  
some of the religious societies1 already
 in existence1 seeing that there are    
several ,missionary-1 ,bible-1 ,tract-1 
and ,school ,societies4 ,i give1        
therefore1 our reasons1 in order to     
show1 that nothing but the desire to    
maintain a good conscience led us to act
 as we did4 ,for as1 by the grace of    
,god1 we acknowledged the word of ,god  
as the only rule of action for the      
disciples of the ,lord ,jesus1 we found1
 in comparing the then existing         

religious ,societies with the word of   
,god1 that they departed so far from it1
 that we could not be united with them1 
and yet maintain a good conscience4 ,i  
only mention here the following points4 
#a4 ,the end which these religious      
societies propose to themselves1 and    
which is constantly put before their    
members1 is1 that the world will        
gradually become better and better1 and 
that at last the whole world will be    
converted4 ,to this end there is        
constantly reference made to the passage
 in ,habakkuk ii4 #ad4 ,for the earth   
shall be filled with the knowledge of   
the glory of the ,lord1 as the waters   
cover the sea1 or the one in ,isaiah xi4
 #i1 ,for the earth shall be full of the
 knowledge of the ,lord1 as the waters  
cover the sea4 ,but that these passages 
can have no reference to the present    
dispensation1 but to the one which will 
commence with the return of the ,lord1  
that in the present dispensation things 
will not become spiritually better1 but 

rather worse1 and that in the present   
dispensation it is not the whole world  
that will be converted1 but only a      
people gathered out from among the      
,gentiles for the ,lord1 is clear from  
many passages of the divine testimony1  
of which ,i only refer to the following3
 ,matt4 xiii4 #bd-cj1 and verse #cf-dc1 
#b ,tim4 iii4 #a-ac1 ,acts4 xv4 #ad4  ,a
 hearty desire for the conversion of    
sinners1 and earnest prayer for it to   
the ,lord1 is quite scriptural2 but it  
is unscriptural to expect the conversion
 of the whole world4 ,such an end we    
could not propose to ourselves in the   
service of the ,lord4  #b4 ,but that    
which is worse1 is the connexion of     
those religious societies with the      
world1 which is completely contrary to  
the word of ,god 7#b ,cor4 vi4 #ad-ah74 
,in temporal things the children of ,god
 need1 whilst they remain here on earth1
 to make use of the world2 but when the 
work to be done requires1 that those who
 attend to it should be possessed of    

spiritual life 7of which unbelievers are
 utterly destitute71 the children of    
,god are bound1 by their loyalty to     
their ,lord1 entirely to refrain from   
association with the unregenerate4 ,but 
alas6 ,the connexion with the world is  
but too marked in these religious       
societies2 for every one who pays a     
guinea1 or1 in some societies1          
half-a-guinea1 is considered as a       
member4 ,although such an individual may
 live in sin2 although he may manifest  
to every one that he does not know the  
,lord ,jesus2 if only the guinea or the 
half-guinea be paid1 he is considered a 
member1 and has a right as such to vote4
 ,moreover1 whoever pays a larger sum1  
for instance1 ,l#aj4 or ,l#bj4 can be1  
in many societies1 a member for life1   
however openly sinful his life should be
 for the time1 or should became         
afterwards4 ,surely1 such things aught  
not to be6  #c4 ,the means which are    
made use of in these religious          
societies1 to obtain money for the work 

of the ,lord1 are also1 in other        
respects1 unscriptural2 for it is a most
 common case to ask the unconverted for 
money1 which even ,abraham would not    
have done 7,genesis xiv4 #ba-bd73 and   
how much less should we do it1 who are  
not only forbidden to have fellowship   
with unbelievers in all such matters 7#b
 ,cor4 vi4 #ad-ah71 but who are also in 
fellowship with the ,father and the     
,son1 and can therefore obtain          
everything from the ,lord which we      
possibly can need in ,his service1      
without being obliged to go to the      
unconverted world6 ,how altogether      
differently the first disciples acted in
 this respect1 we learn from #c ,john   
#g4  #d4 ,not merely1 however1 in these 
particulars is there a connexion with   
the world in these religious societies2 
but it is not a rare thing for even     
,committee ,members 7the individuals who
 manage the affairs of the societies7 to
 be manifestly unconverted persons1 if  
not open enemies to the truth2 and this 

is suffered because they are rich1 or of
 influence1 as it is called4  #e4 ,it is
 a most common thing to endeavour to    
obtain for patrons and presidents of    
these societies1 and for chairmen at the
 public meetings1 persons of rank or    
wealth to attract the public4 ,never    
once have ,i known a case of a ,,poor1  
but very devoted1 wise1 and experienced 
servant of ,christ being invited to fill
 the chair at such public meetings4     
,surely1 the ,galilean fishermen1 who   
were apostles1 or our ,lord ,himself1   
who was called the carpenter1 would not 
have been called to this office1        
according to these principles4 ,these   
things ought not so to be among the     
disciples of the ,lord ,jesus1 who      
should not judge with reference to a    
person's fitness for service in the     
,church of ,christ by the position he   
fills in the world1 or by the wealth he 
possesses6  #f4 ,almost all these       
societies contract debts1 so that it is 
a comparatively rare case to read a     

,report of any of them1 without finding 
that they have expended more than they  
have received1 which1 however1 is       
contrary both to the spirit and to the  
letter of the ,new ,testament4 7,rom4   
xiii4 #h74  ,now1 although brother      
,craik and ,i were ready1 by the grace  
of ,god1 heartily to acknowledge that   
there are not only many true children of
 ,god connected with these religious    
societies1 but that the ,lord has also  
blessed their efforts in many respects1 
notwithstanding the existence of these  
and other principles and practices which
 we judged to be unscriptural1 yet it   
appeared to us to be ,his will1 that we 
should be entirely separate from these  
societies1 7though we should be         
considered as singular persons1 or      
though it should even appear that we    
despised other persons1 or would elevate
 ourselves above them71 in order that1  
by the blessing of ,god1 we might direct
 the attention of the children of ,god  
in these societies to their unscriptural

 practices2 and we would rather be      
entirely unconnected with these         
societies than act contrary to the ,holy
 ,scriptures4 ,we therefore separated   
entirely from them1 although we remained
 united in brotherly love with          
individual believers belonging to them2 
and would by no means judge them for    
remaining in connexion with them1 if    
they do not see that such things are    
contrary to ,scripture4 ,but seeing them
 to be so ourselves1 we could not with a
 clear conscience remain4 ,after we had 
thus gone on for some time1 we          
considered that it would have an        
injurious tendency upon the brethren    
among whom we laboured1 and also be at  
variance with the spirit of the ,gospel 
of ,christ1 if we did nothing at all for
 ,missionary objects1 the circulation of
 the ,holy ,scriptures1 ,tracts1 etc42  
and we were therefore led for these and 
other reasons to do something for the   
spread of the ,gospel at home and       
abroad1 however small the beginning     

might be4 ,this was the origin of the   
,institution1 of which the following    
part of my ,narrative speaks4  ,march   
#e4 ,this evening1 at a public meeting1 
brother ,craik and ,i stated the        
principles on which we intend to carry  
on the institution which we propose to  
establish for the spread of the ,gospel 
at home and abroad4 ,there was nothing  
outwardly influential1 either in the    
number of people present1 or in our     
speeches4 ,may the ,lord graciously be  
pleased to grant ,his blessing upon the 
institution1 which will be called ,the  
,scriptural ,knowledge ,institutions for
 ,home and ,abroad4  ,i4 ,,the          
,,principles ,,of ,,the ,,institution4  
#a4 ,we consider every believer bound1  
in one way or other1 to help the cause  
of ,christ1 and we have ,scriptural     
warrant for expecting the ,lord's       
blessing upon our work of faith and     
labour of love3 and although1 according 
to ,matt4 xiii4 #bd-dc1 #b ,tim4 iii4   
#a-ac1 and many other passages1 the     

world will not be converted before the  
coming of our ,lord ,jesus1 still1 while
 ,he tarries2 all ,scriptural means     
ought to be employed for the ingathering
 of the elect of ,god4  #b4 ,the ,lord  
helping us1 we do not mean to seek the  
patronage of the world2 i4e41 we never  
intend to ask unconverted persons of    
rank or wealth to countenance this      
,institution1 because this1 we consider1
 would be dishonourable to the ,lord4   
,in the name of our ,god we set up our  
banners1 ,ps4 xx4 #e2 ,he alone shall be
 our ,patron1 and if ,he helps us we    
shall prosper1 and if ,he is not on our 
side1 we shall not succeed4  #c4 ,we do 
not mean1 to ask unbelievers for money  
7#b ,cor4 vi4 #ad-ah72 though we do not 
feel ourselves warranted to refuse their
 contributions1 if they1 of their own   
accord should offer them4 ,acts xxviii4 
#b-aj4  #d4 ,we reject altogether the   
help of unbelievers in managing or      
carrying on the affairs of the          
,institution4 #b ,cor1 vi4 #ad-ah4  #e4 

,we intend never to enlarge the field of
 labour by contracting debts 7,rom4     
xiii4 #h71 and afterwards appealing to  
the ,church of ,christ for help1 because
 this we consider to be opposed both to 
the letter and the spirit of the ,new   
,testament2 but in secret prayer1 ,god  
helping us1 we shall carry the wants of 
the ,institution to the ,lord1 and act  
according to the means that ,god shall  
give4  #f4 ,we do not mean to reckon the
 success of the ,institution by the     
amount of money given1 or the number of 
,bibles distributed1 c1 but by the      
,lord's blessing upon the work 7,zech4  
iv4 #f72 and we expect this1 in the     
proportion in which ,he shall help us to
 wait upon ,him in prayer4  #g4 ,while  
we would avoid aiming after needless    
singularity1 we desire to go on simply  
according to ,scripture1 without        
compromising the truth2 at the same time
 thankfully receiving any instruction   
which experienced ,believers1 after     
prayer1 upon ,scriptural ground1 may    

have to give us concerning the          
,institution4  ,,ii4 ,,the ,,objects    
,,of ,,the ,,institution ,,are3  #a4 ,to
 assist ,day-,schools1 ,sunday-,schools1
 and ,adult-,schools1 in which          
instruction is given upon ,scriptural   
principles1 and1 as far as the ,lord may
 give the means1 and supply us with     
suitable teachers1 and in other respects
 make our path plain1 to establish      
,schools of this kind4  a4 ,by          
,day-,schools upon ,scriptural          
principles1 we understand ,day ,schools 
in which the teachers are godly         
persons1--in which the way of salvation 
is scripturally pointed out1--and in    
which no instruction is given opposed to
 the principles of the gospel4  b4      
,sunday-,schools1 in which all the      
teachers are believers1 and in which the
 ,holy ,scriptures alone are the        
foundation of instruction1--are such    
only as the ,institution assists with   
the supply of ,bibles1 ,testaments1 c42 
for we consider it unscriptural1 that   

any persons1 who do not profess to know 
the ,lord themselves1 should be allowed 
to give religious instruction4  c4 ,the 
,institution does not assist any        
,adult-,schools with the supply of      
,bibles1 ,testaments1 ,spelling ,books1 
c41 except the teachers are believers4  
#b4 ,to circulate the ,holy ,scriptures4
  ,we sell ,bibles and ,testaments to   
poor persons at a reduced price4 ,but   
while we1 in general1 think it better   
that the ,scriptures should be sold1 and
 not given altogether gratis1 still1 in 
cases of extreme poverty1 we think it   
right to give1 without payment1 a cheap 
edition4  #c4 ,the third object of this 
,institution is1 to aid ,missionary     
efforts4  ,we desire to assist those    
,missionaries whose proceedings appear  
to be most according to the ,scriptures4
 ,it is proposed to give such a portion 
of the amount of the donations to each  
of the fore-mentioned objects1 as the   
,lord may direct2 but if none of the    
objects should claim a more particular  

assistance1 to lay out an equal portion 
upon each2 yet so1 that if any donor    
desires to give for one of the objects  
exclusively1 the money shall be         
appropriated accordingly4  ,march #g4   
,today we have only one shilling left4  
,many times also in ,bristol our purse  
has been either empty or nearly so1     
though we have not been brought quite so
 low as it regards provisions1 as was   
sometimes the case at ,teignmouth4 ,this
 evening1 when we came home from our    
work1 we found a brother1 our tailor1   
waiting for us1 who brought a new suit  
of clothes both for brother ,craik and  
me1 which a brother1 whose name was not 
to be mentioned1 had ordered for us4    
,march #h4 ,our brother brought us this 
evening also1 from the same friend1 a   
new hat for each of us4  ,march #aj4    
,some time since1 a brother who had been
 brought to the knowledge of the ,lord  
through our instrumentality1 having been
 previously guilty of habitual          
drunkenness and other open sins1        

requested with tears our prayers on     
behalf of his wife1 who1 like himself   
formerly1 was still given to drinking1  
and who grew worse and worse4 ,about ten
 days1 after he had spoken to us1 it    
pleased ,god to begin a work of grace in
 her heart1 in answer to the many       
prayers of her husband1 and this evening
 she was added to us in fellowship4     
,there have come many instances before  
us1 since we have been in ,bristol1 in  
which unbelieving partners have been    
given to believing ones1 in answer to   
their prayers2 yea1 even such as had    
threatened to murder their wives1 or    
leave them1 they would still continue to
 go to our chapels4  ,march #ai4 ,this  
afternoon at five1 my wife was in much  
pain1 which she shortly afterwards      
considered as the token of her hour     
being near4 ,i therefore set off to call
 in a sister1 and then ,i went for the  
nurse1 and my wife's sister1 and our    
servant1 who were at ,clifton4 ,the     
,lord having graciously speeded all     

this1 ,i went to ,bethesda ,chapel1     
where ,i had to preach shortly after4 ,i
 thought it better to spend the few     
minutes1 which ,i had before preaching1 
in prayer for my wife1 than to return   
home again1 as ,i should have had to set
 off directly afterwards1 believing that
 my mind would be thus more quiet and   
calm1 and that ,i also might thus help  
my dearest wife much more effectually4  
,the ,lord most graciously kept me from 
excitement and anxiety1 so that ,i went 
in peace1 preached in peace1 and walked 
home in peace1 looking up to ,jesus to  
prepare me for all that might await me1 
as ,i remembered but too well the two   
former times of my wife's confinement4  
,i might have asked brother ,craik to   
preach1 and have gone home2 but ,i      
thought it more honouring the ,lord to  
do ,his work4 ,in walking home1 the     
following words were a particular       
refreshment to me3--  ,make you ,his    
service your delight1  ,your wants shall
 be ,his care4  ,when ,i came home1 ,i  

heard the joyful news1 that all was     
over1 and that my dear ,mary had been   
delivered at twenty minutes past eight  
of a little boy4 ,observe6 #a4 ,the     
,lord graciously sent the medical       
attendant and the nurse 7the latter     
nearly three miles off71 in the right   
time4 #b4 ,the ,lord put it into my     
heart to honour ,him1 by preferring the 
care of ,his house to that of my own1   
and thus ,he lovingly spared me three   
painful hours4 ,may ,he be pleased to   
give me grace more than ever to love and
 serve ,him6  ,march #ca4 ,today the    
brethren and sisters in communion at    
,bethesda dined together1 having been   
invited by a sister2 and in the evening 
the churches of ,gideon and ,bethesda   
took tea together4 ,both times were     
refreshing seasons4 ,at dinner we were  
together from one till half past three1 
at tea from five to nine4 ,both times we
 prayed repeatedly1 sang hymns1 read a  
little of the ,word1 and several        
brethren spoke of the ,lord's dealings  

with them4  ,april #c4 ,today ,i have   
had again much reason to see how weak ,i
 am1 and how prone to give way to every 
sin if ,i am not kept by ,god4 ,may ,he 
have mercy upon me1 and keep me from    
bringing an open disgrace upon ,his holy
 name6 ,o wretched man that ,i am66     
,april #ad4 ,brother and sister ,craik  
and ourselves have been living together 
hitherto2 but now1 as the ,lord has     
given to them one child1 and to us two1 
and there are but six rooms in our      
house1 so that of late dear brother     
,craik and ,i have had repeatedly to go 
to another house to be uninterrupted3 we
 came at last to the conclusion1 that it
 would be better for our souls and the  
,lord's work that we should separate4   
,april #ae4 ,today ,i received from     
several sisters #bel4 towards furnishing
 a house4  ,april #bc4 ,yesterday and   
today ,i had asked the ,lord to send us 
#bjl41 that we might be able to procure 
a larger stock of ,bibles and           
,testaments than our small funds of the 

,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution     
would allow us to purchase2 and this    
evening a sister1 unasked1 promised to  
give us that sum1 adding that she felt a
 particular pleasure in circulating the 
,holy ,scriptures1 as the simple reading
 of them had been the means of bringing 
her to the knowledge of the ,lord4      
,april #bf4 ,we have repeatedly         
conversed about the name which we should
 give to our babe2 but1 being unsettled 
about it1 and considering that in all   
our ways we ought to acknowledge the    
,lord1 ,i gave myself today to prayer   
concerning this matter1 and the name    
,elijah1 about which ,i never had       
thought1 was particularly1 whilst       
praying1 impressed on my mind1 and      
therefore we intend to name the child   
,elijah1 i4 e41 my ,god is ,jah1        
,jehovah4 ,may the ,lord in mercy grant 
,elijah's spirit and ,elijah's blessing 
to our little one6  ,may #d4 ,today     
#ael4 more was given to me towards      
furnishing a house4 ,thus the ,lord has 

now graciously supplied our need in this
 particular also4 ,may #ac4 ,today #bl4 
more was given to us towards furnishing 
the house1 and also some carpet4 ,may   
#ae4 ,today we moved into our house1    
having lived nearly two years with      
brother and sister ,craik4  ,june #d4   
,today a sister called on me1 and ,i    
felt irritated at her staying1 after    
having given her to understand that ,i  
had but a few minutes time4 ,i sinned   
thus against the ,lord4 ,help ,thou me1 
blessed ,jesus1 in future6  ,june #h4   
,lord's day4 ,i obtained no text        
yesterday1 notwithstanding repeated     
prayer and reading of the ,word4 ,this  
morning ,i awoke with these words3--,my 
grace is sufficient for thee4 ,as soon  
as ,i had dressed myself1 ,i turned to  
#b ,cor4 xii4 to consider this passage2 
but in doing so1 after prayer1 ,i was   
led to think that ,i had not been       
directed to this portion for the sake of
 speaking on it as ,i at first thought1 
and ,i therefore followed my usual      

practice in such cases1 i4 e41 to read  
on in the ,scriptures where ,i left off 
last evening4 ,in doing so1 when ,i came
 to ,heb4 xi4 #ac-af1 ,i felt that this 
was the text4 ,having prayed1 ,i was    
confirmed in it1 and in a few minutes   
the ,lord was pleased to open this      
passage to me4 ,i preached on it with   
great enjoyment1 both at ,gideon and at 
,bethesda1 particularly in the evening  
at ,bethesda4 ,this help was evidently  
from ,god4 ,may ,he fill my heart with  
gratitude1 and encourage me by this1 to 
trust in ,him for the future6 ,i now    
understand why those words1 ,my grace is
 sufficient for thee1 were brought to my
 mind when ,i awoke this morning4--,it  
pleased ,god1 as ,i have heard since1   
greatly to bless what ,i said on that   
passage1 and at least one soul was      
brought through it to the ,lord4  ,june 
#be4 ,these last three days ,i have had 
very little real communion with ,god1   
and have therefore been very weak       
spiritually1 and have several times felt

 irritability of temper4 ,may ,god in   
mercy help me to have more secret       
prayer6--,let none expect to have the   
mastery over his inward corruption in   
any degree1 without going in his        
weakness again and again to the ,lord   
for strength4 ,nor will prayer with     
others1 or conversing with the brethren1
 make up for secret prayer2 for ,i had  
been engaged in both repeatedly1 during 
the three previous days1 as my journal  
shows4  ,june #bf4 ,i was enabled1 by   
the grace of ,god1 to rise early1 and ,i
 had nearly two hours in prayer before  
breakfast4 ,i feel now this morning more
 comfortable4 ,may ,god in mercy help me
 to walk before ,him this day1 and to do
 ,his work2 and may ,he keep me from all
 evil6  ,july #e4 ,the ,lord very       
mercifully kept us today from a great   
calamity1 the apron of our ,christian   
servant having caught fire2 but the fire
 was extinguished1 and she was kept from
 being burned6  ,july #aa4 ,i have      
prayed much about a master for a boys'  

school1 to be established in connexion  
with our little ,institution4 ,eight    
have applied for the situation1 but none
 seemed to be suitable4 ,now at last the
 ,lord has given us a brother1 who will 
commence the work4 ,the ,lord allowed us
 to call upon ,him many times before ,he
 answered1 but at last ,he granted our  
request4  ,july #ac4 ,today we finished 
reading through the ,scriptures1 at     
family prayer1 the second time since we 
came to ,bristol1 which is little more  
than two years4 ,i mention this         
circumstance to show how often we may   
read through the whole of the           
,scriptures1 though we should read but  
little every day1 if we go regularly    
onward4  ,august #ah4 ,today brother    
,craik and ,i engaged a sister to be    
governess of another girls' school1     
which we intend to establish1 in        
dependence upon the ,lord for supplies4 
,august #bg4 ,i had prayed repeatedly1  
and had read ten chapters of the ,word  
to get a text1 but obtained none1 and   

had to go this evening to the chapel    
without knowing on what portion of ,his 
,holy ,word the ,lord would have me to  
speak4 ,at the commencement of the      
meeting ,i was directed to ,lament4 iii4
 #bb-bf1 on which ,i spoke with much    
assistance and enjoyment4  ,september   
#ah4 ,a brother1 a tailor1 was sent to  
measure me for new clothes4 ,my clothes 
are again getting old1 and it is        
therefore very kind of the ,lord to     
provide thus4 ,september #be4 ,a brother
 sent me a new hat today4  ,october #i4 
,our little institution1 established in 
dependence upon the ,lord1 and supplied 
by ,him with means1 has now been seven  
months in operation1 and through it have
 been benefited with instruction1--#a4  
,in the ,sunday-,school1 about #abj     
children4 #b4 ,in the ,adult-,school1   
about #dj ,adults4 #c4 ,in the two      
,day-,schools for boys and1 the two     
,day-,schools for girls1 #bji children1 
of whom #ed have been entirely free2 the
 others pay about one-third of the      

expense4 ,there have been also          
circulated #dhb ,bibles1 and #ebj ,new  
,testaments4 ,lastly1 #egl4 has been    
spent to aid missionary exertions4 ,the 
means which the ,lord has sent us1 as   
the fruit of many prayers1 during these 
seven months1 amount to #afgl4 #ajs4 #j 
#a_/b;d4  ,october #bh4 ,this afternoon 
brother ,craik and ,i took tea with     
seven brethren and sisters1 whom the    
,lord has brought to a knowledge of     
,himself through our instrumentality1   
within the last two years2 all but one  
belonging to the same family4 ,we heard 
there a most affecting account of a poor
 little orphan boy1 who for some time   
attended one of our schools1 and who    
seems there1 as far as we can judge1 to 
have been brought to a real concern     
about his soul1 through what ,i said    
concerning the torments of hell1 and who
 some time ago was taken to the         
poor-house some miles out of ,bristol4  
,he has expressed great sorrow that he  
can no longer attend our school and     

ministry4 ,may this1 if it be the       
,lord's will1 lead me to do something   
also for the supply of the temporal     
wants of poor children1 the pressure of 
which has occasioned this poor boy to be
 taken away from our school6  ,november 
#a4 ,today1 our means being completely  
gone1 we had them supplied in the       
following manner3--some time since some 
silver spoons were given to us1 which we
 never used1 from the consideration1    
that for servants of ,christ it was     
better1 for the sake of example1 to use 
cheaper ones1 and for that reason we had
 sold our plate at ,teignmouth4 ,yet up 
to this day those spoons remained       
unsold4 ,but now1 as we wanted money1 we
 disposed of them1 considering that the 
kind giver would not be displeased at   
our doing so to supply our need4        
,november #d4 ,i spent the greater part 
of the morning in reading the ,word and 
in prayer1 and asked also for our daily 
bread1 for we have scarcely any money   
left4--,we obtained today two large     

school-rooms1 which we much needed4     
,thus the ,lord graciously helps us     
concerning the ,institution1 and gives  
us faith to go forward in the work1     
enlarging the field more and more       
7though we have but little money71 yet  
so that we do not contract debts4       
,november #e4 ,i spent almost the whole 
of the day in prayer and reading the    
,word4 ,i prayed also again for the     
supply of our own temporal wants1 but   
the ,lord has not as yet appeared4      
,still my eyes are up to ,him4 ,november
 #h4 ,saturday4 ,the ,lord has          
graciously again supplied our temporal  
wants during this week1 though at the   
commencement of it we had but little    
left4 ,i have prayed much this week for 
money1 more than any other week1 as far 
as ,i remember1 since we have been in   
,bristol4 ,the ,lord has not answered   
our prayers by causing means to be sent 
in the way of a gift1 but has supplied  
us through our selling what we did not  
need1 or by our being paid what was awed

 to us4  ,december #aj4 ,today we found 
that a departed brother had left both to
 brother ,craik and me #abl4 ,december  
#ca1 #ahcd4--;,i4 ,since brother ,craik 
and ,i have been labouring in ,bristol1 
#bbg brethren and sisters have been     
added to us in fellowship4 ,we found #fh
 believers in the church at ,gideon1 so 
that now the whole number would be #bie1
 had there been no changes1 but it is   
only #beg2 for twelve have fallen       
asleep2 six have left ,bristol2 twelve  
have left the churches during the two   
years and six months1 but are still in  
,bristol2 eight are under church        
discipline1 respecting some of whom1    
however1 we hope that they maybe soon   
restored to communion4 ,of those #beg1  
there belong #abe to ,bethesda church1  
and #acb to ,gideon church4 ,out of the 
#bbg who have been added to us1 #ajc    
have been converted through our         
instrumentality1 and many have been     
brought into the liberty of the ,gospel1
 or reclaimed from backsliding4         

,forty-seven young converts are at      
,gideon1 and fifty-six at ,bethesda4    
,considering that some have fallen      
asleep who never were in communion with 
us1 and yet converted through our       
instrumentality2 and that some are      
united to other churches in and out of  
,bristol2 and that many are now standing
 as candidates for fellowship1 of those 
who have been given to us in this city1 
as seals to our ministry2 the number    
added may be only one-half1 or          
two-thirds of the real number4 ,may the 
,lord fill our hearts with gratitude1   
for having thus condescended to use us6 
,,ii4 ,the income which the ,lord has   
given me during this year is3--  #a4 ,my
 part of the freewill offerings through 
the boxes ,l#ace #acs4 #b #a_/d;d4  #b4 
,money given to me by saints in and out 
of ,bristol ,l#ib #gs4 #f;d4            
,altogether4 4 4 ,l#bbh #js4 #h #a_/d;d4
  #c4 ,besides this1 many articles in   
provisions1 clothing1 and furniture1    
worth to us about ,l#fj #js4 #j;d4      

,january #a1 #ahce4 ,we had last evening
 an especial prayer-meeting of the two  
churches1 and any other persons hat     
chose to attend1 for the sake of        
praising the ,lord for all ,his many    
mercies which we have received during   
the past year1 and to ask ,him to       
continue to us ,his favour during this  
year also4 ,it was open to any of the   
brethren to pray1 as they felt disposed1
 and eighteen did so1 as ,i afterwards  
reckoned4 ,we continued in prayer and   
praise1 mixed with singing1 reading the 
,word1 and exhortation1 from seven in   
the evening till one in the morning4    
,january #ac4 ,from ten till one in the 
first part of the day1 and from six to  
half-past eight this evening1 ,i        
visited1 from house to house1 the people
 living in ,orange ,street1 and saw in  
this way the families living in nine    
houses1 to ascertain whether any        
individuals wanted ,bibles1 whether they
 could read1 whether they wished their  
children to be put to our ,day-,schools 

or ,sunday-,school1 with the view of    
helping them accordingly4 ,this afforded
 opportunities to converse with them    
about their souls4 ,in this way ,i sold 
eight ,bibles and two ,testaments at    
reduced prices1 and gave away one       
,testament2 engaged one woman as an     
adult scholar1 one boy as a day scholar2
 and spoke besides this to about thirty 
people about their souls4--,january #ae4
 ,this morning1 from ten till one1 ,i   
went again from house to house in       
,orange ,street4 ,i visited nine houses1
 sold a ,bible and ,testament at reduced
 prices1 and engaged1 a few children for
 the schools1 and conversed with fifteen
 persons about their souls4 ,i should   
greatly delight in being frequently     
engaged in such work1 for it is a most  
important one2 but our hands are so full
 with other work1 that we can do but    
little in this way4--,january #ag4      
,today brother ,groves arrived from the 
,east ,indies4 ,one reason of his coming
 to ,england is1 to go to ,germany to   

obtain missionary brethren for the ,east
 ,indies1 having reason to believe that 
he will find them there2 and he asked   
me1 on account of my acquaintance with  
the language1 to accompany him1 that    
thus1 through me1 he may be enabled to  
judge about the state of the brethren1  
and to communicate to them what he      
thinks needful for them to know4 ,this  
is a most important work4 ,may the ,lord
 direct me in this matter1 and make me  
to act according to ,his will6--,i      
received again today1 after prayer      
respecting the funds1 #ajl4 for the     
,scriptural ,knowledge                  
,institution4--,january #ba4 ,received1 
in answer to prayer1 from an unexpected 
quarter1 #el4 for the ,scriptural       
,knowledge ,institution4 ,the ,lord     
pours in1 whilst we seek to pour out4   
,for during the past week1 merely among 
the poor1 in going from house to house1 
fifty-eight copies of the ,scriptures   
were sold at reduced prices1 the going  
on with which is most important1 but it 

will require much means4  ,january #bh4 
,i have1 for these several days1 again  
prayed much to ascertain whether the    
,lord will have me to go as a missionary
 to the ,east ,indies1 and ,i am most   
willing to go1 if ,he will condescend to
 use me in this way4 ,january #bi4 ,i   
have been greatly stirred up to pray    
about going to ,calcutta as a           
missionary4 ,may the ,lord guide me in  
this matter6 ,after all my repeated and 
earnest prayer in the commencement of   
#ahce1 and willingness on my part to go1
 if it were the ,lord's will1 still ,he 
did not send me4  ,february #d4 ,i have 
been praying repeatedly and earnestly of
 late respecting my journey to the      
,continent4 ,i desire to go1 or not to  
go1 just as the ,lord will have it to   
be4 ,may ,he graciously direct me6 ,i   
feel the same about going to ,india4 ,as
 a means to ascertain the ,lord's will1 
,i have been reading about the ,hindoos1
 that ,i may know more clearly the state
 in which they are4 ,may the ,lord in   

mercy stir me up to care more about     
their state1 whether it be ,his will    
that ,i should labour personally among  
them1 or not6  ,february #af4 ,i        
mentioned this evening1 before the      
church at ,bethesda1 as also on the     
#acth before the church at ,gideon1 that
 ,i see it the ,lord's will to go to the
 ,continent1 for the sake of assisting  
brother ,groves by my knowledge of the  
,german language1 in conferring with    
those who may desire to go out as       
missionaries4 ,there is not one believer
 amongst us who sees any objection to   
it1 and several have expressed that it  
seems to be of the ,lord1 and that thus 
we could help1 as churches1 in the going
 forth of missionaries4 ,this is very   
comforting to me1 as the ,lord confirms 
me still more1 through this unanimity1  
in its being ,his will that ,i should   
go4  ,february #be4 ,in the name of the 
,lord1 and in dependence upon ,him alone
 for support1 we have established a     
fifth ,day-,school for poor children1   

which today has been opened4 ,we have   
now two boys' schools1 and three girls' 
schools4 ,february #bf4 ,this afternoon 
,i left ,bristol for the ,continent4    
,february #bg4 ,london4 ,this morning ,i
 went to the ,alien ,office for my      
passport4 ,on entering the office ,i saw
 a printed paper1 in which it is stated 
that every alien neglecting to renew1   
every six months1 his certificate of    
residence which he receives on          
depositing his passport1 subjects       
himself to a penalty of ,l#ej1 or       
imprisonment4 ,this law ,i have         
ignorantly broken ever since ,i left    
,london in #ahbi4 ,it appeared to me    
much better to confess at once that ,i  
had ignorantly done so1 than now        
willfully break it2 trusting in the     
,lord as it regarded the consequences of
 the step4 ,i did so1 and the ,lord     
inclined the heart of the officer with  
whom ,i had to do1 to pass over my      
noncompliance with the law1 on account  
of my having broken it ignorantly4      

,having obtained my passport1 ,i found  
an unexpected difficulty in the         
,prussian ambassador refusing to sign   
it1 as it did not contain a description 
of my person1 and therefore ,i needed to
 prove that ,i was the individual spoken
 of in the passport4 ,this difficulty   
was not removed for three days1 when1   
after earnest prayer1 through a paper   
signed by same citizens of ,london1 to  
whom ,i am known1 the ambassador was    
satisfied4 ,this very difficulty1 when  
once the ,lord had removed it1 afforded 
me cause for thanksgiving2 for ,i now   
obtained a new passport1 worded in such 
a way1 that1 should ,i ever need it     
again1 will prevent similar             
difficulties4  ,march #c4 ,this evening 
,i preached comfortably in ,johnstreet  
,chapel1 for ,brother ,evans4 ,i never  
preached in any place where ,i so much  
felt that he who statedly ministers was 
more worthy than myself4 ,this feeling  
led me to earnest prayer1 and the ,lord 
heard and assisted me4  ,march #g4      

,dover4 ,last evening ,i left ,london1  
and arrived here this morning4 ,the     
,lord enabled me to confess ,him before 
my fellow-passengers4 ,i have had a good
 deal of prayer and reading the ,word in
 quietness1 though staying in an        
hotel4--,march #h4 ,i preached this     
morning and evening comfortably in one  
of the chapels at ,dover4 ,march #i4    
,all this day too we have been obliged  
to remain at ,dover1 the sea being so   
rough that no packet sails4 ,i spent the
 day in writing letters1 in reading the 
,word1 and in prayer4 ,we depend        
entirely upon the ,lord as it regards   
our movements4 ,this evening we asked   
the ,lord twice1 unitedly1 that ,he     
would be pleased to calm the wind and   
the waves1 and ,i now feel quite        
comfortable in leaving the matter with  
,him6  ,march #aj4 ,the ,lord heard our 
prayer4 ,we awake early in the morning1 
and found the wind comparatively calm4  
,we left the hotel before break of day1 
to go to the packet4 ,all being in great

 hurry1 on our way towards the sea1 ,i  
was separated from brothers ,g4 and ,y4 
,i now lifted up my heart to the ,lord1 
as ,he generally helps me to do on such 
occasions1 to direct my steps towards   
the boat which went out to meet the     
packet1 and ,i found it almost          
immediately4 ,we had1 in answer to      
prayer1 a good passage4 ,at ,calais we  
obtained our passports1 luggage out of  
the custom house1 and places in the     
diligence without difficulty1 and left a
 little after ten in the morning for    
,paris4 ,what a blessed thing it is1 in 
all such matters1 to have a ,father to  
go to for help6 ,what a different thing1
 also1 to travel in the service of the  
,lord ,jesus1 from what it is to travel 
in the service of the flesh6  ,march    
#aa4 ,paris4 ,we arrived here about ten 
this evening4 ,march #ab4 ,today we went
 about our passports1 and ,i saw thus a 
good deal of the best part of ,paris4   
,blessed be ,god1 my heart is above     
these things6 ,if ten years ago1 when my

 poor foolish heart was full of ,paris1 
,i had come here1 how should ,i have    
been taken up with these palaces1 c42   
but now ,i look at these things1 and my 
heart does not care about them1 ,what a 
difference grace makes6 ,there were few 
people1 perhaps1 more passionately fond 
of traveling1 and seeing fresh places1  
and new scenes1 than myself2 but now1   
since1 by the grace of ,god1 ,i have    
seen beauty in the ,lord ,jesus1 ,i have
 lost my taste for these things4  ,march
 #ac4 ,we again found difficulty in     
obtaining our passports1 arising1       
probably1 from a mistake of the police  
officers4 ,may the ,lord order this     
matter so1 that it shall be for our real
 welfare6--,march #ad4 ,by the help of  
the ,lord we obtained our passports1 and
 brother ,groves and ,i took our places 
in the ,malle ,poste for ,strasburg1 to 
leave tomorrow evening4 ,brother ,y4    
intends to remain here a few days1 on   
account of his health4  ,march #ae4     
,this morning ,i preached in a little   

chapel in ,palais ,royal4 ,we left      
,paris this evening at six4--,march #ag4
 ,from six o'clock in the evening of the
 #aeth1 till this afternoon at half-past
 one1 when we arrived at ,strasburg1 ,we
 were continually shut up in the ,malle 
,poste1 with the exception of yesterday 
morning about seven1 and last night     
about eleven1 when we were allowed half 
an hour for our meals4 ,i had refreshing
 communion with my beloved brother4     
,this quickest of all conveyances in    
,france carries only two passengers1 and
 we were thus able freely to converse   
and to pray together1 which was         
refreshing indeed4 ,though we had       
traveled forty-four hours1 yet as we had
 soon finished our business at          
,strasburg1 we left this evening for    
,basle1 trusting in the ,lord for       
strength for the third night's          
traveling4 ,a little after we had       
started1 we stuck fast in a new road4 ,i
 lifted up my heart to the ,lord1 and we
 were soon delivered1 otherwise the     

circumstance1 in a cold night1 and      
during a fall of snow1 would have been  
trying1 as we had to get out of the     
mail4 ,i now found myself again1 after  
six years1 amidst fellow-passengers who 
spoke my native language2 but alas6 they
 spoke not for ,christ4  ,march #ah4    
,this afternoon we arrived at ,basle1   
where we were very kindly received by   
the brethren4--,march #bc4 ,basle4      
,these six days we have received great  
kindness from the brethren4 ,the ,lord  
has given me an opportunity of bringing 
before several who are already engaged  
in the ministry of the ,word1 and before
 many who intend to give themselves to  
this work1 many important truths1 so    
that in these opportunities ,i have been
 richly repaid for the journey4 ,this   
morning ,i conversed also with three    
brethren1 journeymen1 who have a desire 
to give themselves to missionary work2  
but nothing could be decided now4 ,i    
awake very faint1 but have been         
mercifully helped through the work4     

,brother ,groves intends to go to       
,geneva1 and ,i to ,tubingen1 in order  
to become acquainted with a brother1 a  
student1 who is likely to go out with   
,brother ,groves as a tutor to his sons1
 and to combine with this1 missionary   
service4  ,during my stay at ,basle ,i  
attended one day a meeting at which a   
venerable pious clergyman expounded the 
,greek ,new ,testament to several       
brethren1 who purposed to give          
themselves to missionary service4 ,the  
passage to which this dear aged brother 
had then come1 in the original of the   
,new ,testament1 was #a ,peter iii4 #a1 
#b1 which1 in our ,english translation1 
reads thus3 ,likewise1 ye wives1 be in  
subjection to your own husbands2 that1  
if any obey not the word1 they also may 
without the word be won by the          
conversation of the wives2 while they   
behold your chaste conversation coupled 
with fear4 ,after this aged brother had 
expounded the passage1 he related a     
circumstance which had occurred in his  

own days1 and under his own eyes1 at    
,basle1 which has appeared to me so     
encouraging for those children of ,god  
who have unbelieving relatives1 and     
especially for sisters in the ,lord who 
have unbelieving husbands2 and which1 at
 the same time1 is such a beautiful     
illustration of #a ,peter iii1 #a42 that
 ,i judge it desirable to insert the    
narrative of this fact here4 ,i will do 
so as exactly as ,i remember it4 ,there 
lived at ,basle an opulent citizen1     
whose wife was a believer1 but he       
himself feared not the ,lord4 ,his      
practice was1 to spend his evenings in a
 wine-house1 where he would often tarry 
till eleven1 twelve1 or even one        
o'clock4 ,on such occasions his wife    
always used to send her servants to bed1
 and sat up herself2 to await the return
 of her husband4 ,when at last he came1 
she used to receive him most kindly1    
never reproach him in the least1 either 
at the time or afterwards1 nor complain 
at all on account of his late hours1 by 

which she was kept from seasonable rest4
 ,moreover1 if it should be needful to  
assist him in undressing himself1 when  
he had drunk to excess1 she would do    
this also in a very kind and meek way4  
,thus it went on for a long time4 ,one  
evening1 this gentleman was again1 as   
usual1 in a wine-house1 and having      
tarried there with his merry companions 
till midnight1 he said to them3 ,i bet1 
that if we go to my house1 we shall find
 my wife sitting up and waiting for me1 
and she herself will come to the door   
and receive us very kindly2 and if ,i   
ask her to prepare us a supper1 she will
 do it at once without the least murmur1
 or unkind expression1 or look4 ,his    
companions in sin did not believe his   
statement4 ,at last1 however1 after some
 more conversation about this strange   
statement1 7as it appeared to them17 it 
was agreed that they would all go1 to   
see this kind wife4 ,accordingly they   
went1 and1 after they had knocked1 found
 the door immediately opened by the lady

 herself1 and they were all courteously 
and kindly received by her4 ,the party  
having entered1 the master of the house 
asked his wife to prepare supper for    
them1 which she1 in the meekest way1 at 
once agreed to do2 and1 after awhile1   
supper was served by herself2 without   
the least sign of dissatisfaction1 or   
murmur1 or complaint4 ,having now       
prepared all for the company1 she       
retired from the party to her room4     
,when she had left the party1 one of the
 gentlemen said3 ,what a wicked and     
cruel man you are1 thus to torment so   
kind a wife4 ,he then took his hat and  
stick1 and1 without touching a morsel of
 the supper1 went away4 ,another made a 
similar remark1 and left1 without       
touching the supper4 ,thus one after    
another left1 till they were all gone1  
without tasting the supper4 ,the master 
of the house was now left alone1 and the
 ,spirit of ,god brought before him all 
his dreadful wickedness1 and especially 
his great sins towards his wife2 and the

 party had not left the house half an   
hour1 before he went to his wife's room1
 requesting her to pray for him1 told   
her that he felt himself a great sinner1
 and asked her forgiveness for all his  
behaviour towards her4 ,from that time  
he became a disciple of the ,lord       
,jesus4  ,observe here1 dear reader1 the
 following points in particular1 which  
,i affectionately commend to your       
consideration3 #a1 ,the wife acted in   
accordance with #a ,peter iii4 #a4 ,she 
kept her place as being in subjection1  
and the ,lord owned it4 #b1 ,she        
reproached not her husband1 but meekly  
and kindly served him when he used to   
come home4 #c1 ,she did not allow the   
servants to sit up for their master1 but
 sat up herself2 thus honouring him as  
her head and superior1 and concealed    
also1 as far as she was able1 her       
husband's shame from the servants4 #d1  
,in all probability a part of those     
hours1 during which she had to sit up1  
was spent in prayer for her husband1 or 

in reading the word of ,god1 to gather  
fresh strength for all the trials       
connected with her position4 ,but       
whether this was the case or not1 it is 
certain that thus1 under similar        
circumstances1 the time might be spent1 
and it would then indeed be spent       
profitably4 #e1 ,be not discouraged if  
you have to suffer from unconverted     
relatives4 ,perhaps very shortly the    
,lord may give you the desire of your   
heart1 and answer your prayer for them2 
but in the meantime seek to commend the 
truth1 not by reproaching them on       
account of their behaviour towards you1 
but by manifesting towards them the     
meekness1 gentleness1 and kindness of   
the ,lord ,jesus ,christ4  ,march #be4  
,tubingen in ,wirtemberg4 ,the day      
before yesterday ,i left ,basle in the  
afternoon4 ,the ,lord enabled me to     
confess ,him before a young man and his 
wife1 who were going to ,vienna to      
increase their riches4 ,what a mercy    
that grace has made me to differ1 and   

that ,i travel the service of another   
master6 ,they listened very attentively1
 and were not at all opposed4 ,they also
 esteem the people of ,god1 and have    
been in the habit of meeting with them4 
,our parting was very affectionate and  
solemn1 after ,i had charged them to    
care earnestly about the one thing      
needful4  ,i arrived1 yesterday morning 
at six1 at ,schaffhausen4 ,i found a    
brother waiting for me at the post      
office1 a gentleman of title1 who1      
having been informed by brethren at     
,basle of my arrival1 kindly took me to 
his house for the two hours ,i had to   
stay in that town1 to refresh my body   
with breakfast1 and my soul with        
communion with the brethren whom he had 
invited to meet me4 ,i was in this town 
about ten years ago4 ,i was now again   
within a short distance of the fall of  
the ,rhine1 which was then most         
attractive to me4 ,now ,i considered    
that my time could be spent much more   
profitably than by going there4 ,the    

little time that ,i was at              
,schaffhausen1 ,i received much         
information concerning the state of the 
church in many parts of the ,continent1 
from a believing physician and a        
clergyman2 and ,i also communicated     
things which1 with ,god's blessing1 may 
be profitable4 ,after this ,i continued 
my journey to ,tubingen4 ,it was with   
peculiar feelings2 for all this way ,i  
had traversed nearly ten years ago1 to  
gratify my natural desire for           
travelling1 and now ,i went over the    
same ground in the service of the ,lord 
,jesus4  ,i arrived here this morning at
 nine1 having been strengthened to      
travel two nights and a day and a half1 
though ,i left ,basle very weak4 ,this  
morning ,i saw brother ,gundert1 the    
student of divinity1 on whose account ,i
 am here1 and spent about three hours in
 conversation with him4 ,afterwards ,i  
called on a ,christian professor in the 
university1 who received me kindly4     
,this evening ,i had a meeting with the 

believing students1 for whom the ,lord  
gave me a word4  ,march #bf4 ,this      
morning ,i drove with brother ,gundert  
to ,stuttgart1 both for the sake of     
seeing more of him1 and also that we    
might unitedly talk over the matter with
 his father1 who lives there4 ,i am now 
staying at the house of brother ,gundert
 senior1 where ,i am kindly lodged4 ,i  
think brother ,gundert junior1 will go  
to the ,east ,indies4 ,his father is not
 only willing to give him up for the    
,lord's sake1 but seems to consider it  
an honour to have a son to give to the  
,lord in this way4 ,this evening ,i     
again met several brethren1 to whom ,i  
spoke about the things of ,god4  ,march 
#cj4 ,halle4 ,from the evening of the   
#bgth till this afternoon1 when ,i      
arrived here1 ,i have traveled day and  
night1 and have been strengthened by the
 ,lord for it4 ,the whole of this way1  
several hundred miles1 ,i had gone step 
by step before4 ,my thoughts were       
peculiarly affecting1 as ,i retraced the

 mercies which ,i had experienced at the
 hands of ,god4--,the ,lord enabled me  
repeatedly to confess ,his name before  
my changing fellow-travelers4 ,a student
 spoke to me about the peculiarly good  
and cheap wine of ,weinheim1 near       
,heidelberg4 ,i told him that when1     
years ago1 as a student like himself1 ,i
 came through that place1 ,i cared about
 such things1 but that now ,i knew what 
was much better than wine4--,yesterday a
 ,frenchman1 having heard my testimony  
for ,jesus once or twice1 when the last 
merry companion had left the coach1     
quitted my society1 it being too dull   
for him1 and joined himself to an       
officer in the army1 sitting in the     
forepart of the coach4 7,the coach was  
divided into the forepart and inside47  
,this gave me a blessed and most        
refreshing opportunity to pray for about
 an hour aloud in the coach1 which      
strengthened and refreshed my soul4 ,it 
was particularly kind of the ,lord to   
give me an opportunity of praying aloud1

 as1 on account of having then already  
traveled forty-eight hours              
uninterruptedly1 my body was too tired  
to allow me to continue for any length  
of time in mental prayer4--,yesterday   
afternoon1 at ,eisenach 7situated just  
under the hill on which stands the      
decayed castle called the ,wartburg1    
where ,luther translated the ,holy      
,scriptures71 ,i saw fearful scenes of  
profanity4 ,how has the candlestick been
 removed6--,this afternoon ,i reached   
,halle1 where it pleased the ,lord to   
bring me to the knowledge of ,himself1  
having been graciously preserved        
hitherto1 though a spring was found     
broken when ,i got out of the mail4 ,i  
greatly needed rest1 but my heart was   
too full4 ,i could not sleep4 ,i went   
first to the house of the brother1 where
 ,i was first impressed1 and afterwards 
,i called on my esteemed tutor1         
professor ,dr4 ,tholuck1 counsellor of  
the ,consistory1 who received me1 after 
seven years' separation1 with his former

 kindness and brotherly love4 7,he made 
me lodge with him1 and gave thereby a   
testimony that differences of views1    
concerning certain parts of ,god's      
truth1 ought not to separate the        
children of ,god2 for ,i had written to 
him my mind from ,bristol two years     
before47  ,march #ca4 ,today ,i rode    
with ,dr4 ,tholuck and two young        
brethren to a believing clergyman1      
living in the neighbourhood of ,halle1  
where we spent the day4 ,dr4 ,tholuck   
told me many encouraging things1        
particularly this1 that several of my   
former fellow-students1 who1 at the time
 when ,i was at ,halle1 knew not the    
,lord1 had been brought to know ,him    
since1 and are now labouring in ,his    
vineyard4 ,and further1 that certain    
brethren1 formerly very weak in the     
faith1 had been established1 and are now
 going on well4 ,may this encourage the 
heart of the believing reader still to  
pray for his unconverted friends1 and   
may it strengthen him to hope for better

 days concerning those of his brethren  
in the ,lord who are now weak in the    
faith6  ,april #a4 ,today ,i saw a      
clergyman1 in whom ,i recognized an     
individual who studied at ,halle1 whilst
 ,i was there1 living then in open sin1 
and who is now1 by divine mercy1        
pointing sinners to the ,lamb of ,god4  
,in the evening ,i went to the large    
,orphan-house1 built1 in dependence on  
the ,lord1 by ,a4 ,h4 ,franke1 to see   
one of the classical teachers1 who is   
the son of my father's neighbour1 and   
whom ,i had not seen for about fifteen  
years4 ,i found him1 to the joy of my   
heart1 to be a brother in the ,lord4    
,this evening ,i spent in the same room 
where it pleased the ,lord to begin a   
work of grace in my heart1 with several 
of the same brethren and sisters with   
whom ,i used to meet seven years ago1   
and told them of the ,lord's            
faithfulness1 gentleness1 kindness1 and 
forbearance towards me1 since ,i had    
seen them last4 ,truly how good has the 

,lord been to me since6  ,april #b4     
,this morning ,i again spent in calling 
on the brethren and sisters1 being      
enabled1 every where1 before learned and
 unlearned1 to testify about the        
blessedness of adhering to the          
,scriptures as our only guide in        
spiritual things4 ,i left ,halle this   
afternoon1 having received much love    
from the brethren1 and drove fifteen    
miles further1 to a beloved brother and 
old friend1 brother ,stahlschmidt at    
,sandersleben1 who has shown me much    
kindness even since ,i have been in     
,england4 ,i was received with much love
 by this brother and his dear wife1 and 
his man servant1 also a beloved brother4
 ,this brother 7the man servant7 ,i met 
fifty-four years ago at ,gnadau1 a      
,moravian settlement1 where ,i several  
times spent a few days for the          
refreshment of my soul1 to which place  
he also came1 a distance of about       
forty-five miles1 for the same purpose4 
,he was then living with a farmer1      

ploughing his fields1 c4 ,at that time  
our hearts were knit together2 for ,i   
wish it to be understood by any         
unconverted reader1 that1 whilst ,i     
should at one time have looked with     
scorn upon such a person1 if he had     
attempted to be familiar with me1 now   
the love of ,jesus1 in whom we were one1
 filled my heart with love to him1 and  
these outward distinctions were broken  
down4 ,in consequence of this           
acquaintance1 he wrote me several       
letters to ,halle1 and ,i wrote to him4 
,those letters were particularly        
refreshing and spiritual1 and therefore 
,i read them to other brethren1 and also
 to brother ,stahlschmidt1 a wine       
merchant4 ,on account of this1 he had a 
great desire to have brother ,kroll     
living in his house4 ,the ,lord1 after a
 time1 brought it about1 and this       
brother lived with him above forty      
years1 and was a friend1 a brother1 and 
a most faithful servant to this         
merchant1 so that his considerable      

business was in a great measure         
intrusted to him2 and yet he treated his
 master with all due respect1 and kept  
his place as a servant4 ,this latter    
point is very important1 and brings     
glory to ,god4 ,for whilst a believing  
master should treat a believing servant 
with all kindness and brotherly love2   
yet the believing servant should with   
all obedience1 with all faithfulness1   
and particularly with due respect1 treat
 his believing master or mistress4      
,april #c4 ,sandersleben4 ,today ,i saw 
several brethren and sisters1 and among 
others a brother1 who is in about the   
same state in which he was eight years  
ago4 ,he has very little enjoyment1 and 
makes no progress in the things of ,god4
 ,the reason is1 that1 against his      
conscience1 he remains in a calling1    
which is opposed to the profession of a 
believer4 ,we are exhorted in ,scripture
 to abide in our calling2 but only if we
 can abide in it with ,god4 #a ,cor4    
vii4 #bd4--,this evening a believing    

clergyman1 and the brethren and sisters 
of this small town and some neighbouring
 villages1 were collected together in   
brother ,stahlschmidt's house1 and ,i   
spoke to them for two hours about the   
things of ,god1 particularly about the  
way in which ,god has led me1 since ,i  
saw them1 and sought to strengthen their
 hands in ,god1 and exhorted them to    
give themselves fully to the ,lord4 ,it 
was a time of refreshing4 ,indeed1 the  
,lord has greatly refreshed my own soul1
 at ,basle1 ,tubingen1 ,stuttgart1      
,halle1 and elsewhere1 whenever ,i have 
spoken well of ,his name4 ,the child of 
,god should make it his particular      
business to encourage sinners to seek   
after the ,lord1 and to increase the    
faith and love of the brethren1 through 
speaking well of the name of the ,lord4 
,april #d4 ,i left ,sandersleben this   
morning4 ,my brother and host acted     
according to #c ,john1 #e and #f2 for he
 sent me on ten miles in his carriage4  
,when ,i arrived at ,aschersleben1 to   

which place brother ,stahlschmidt had   
conveyed me1 ,i had but one station more
 to my father's house4 ,on the way ,i   
asked the driver about a certain        
individual1 with whom ,i studied at     
,halle1 once a companion with me in open
 sin4 ,i found that he is still in the  
same state4 ,what a difference has grace
 made between him and me6 ,nothing1     
nothing but grace has made this         
difference6 ,i1 guilty sinner1 might now
 be still on the same road1 and he1 in  
my room1 might have been plucked as a   
brand out of the fire4 ,but it is not   
so4 ,may the ,lord help me to love him  
much1 very much1 for ,his distinguishing
 grace6--,such feelings ,i had in       
particular this afternoon1 when ,i saw  
the town before me in which my father   
lives1 as there are but two in the whole
 place1 as far as ,i can find out1 who  
love the ,lord4 ,how different is       
everything with me now from what it was 
when1 as a wicked youth1 ,i used to go  
to this town1 at the time of my         

vacation4 ,how truly happy am ,i now6   
,how is my heart now raised above all   
those things in which ,i sought1 and    
also fancied ,i found happiness6 ,truly 
all these things are like bubbles to me 
now6 ,my heart is not here2 yea1 my     
heart is not even in ,england4 ,my heart
 is1 at least in a measure1 in heaven1  
though ,i am still nothing but a poor   
weak worm4 ,i felt the solemnity and    
importance of having once more the      
privilege of seeing my aged father4 ,i  
also felt the importance of being at the
 place1 where ,i had spent much of my   
time in my youth1 and where ,i had been 
known as living in sin4 ,my desire was1 
that ,i might be enabled to walk1 the   
three days ,i intended to stay there1 as
 it becomes a servant of ,christ4 ,for  
this ,i had been led to prayer before ,i
 left ,bristol1 and since ,i have been  
on the ,continent4 ,at last ,i arrived  
at my father's house4 ,how affecting to 
meet him once more6  ,april #e4         
,heimersleben4 ,this afternoon a friend 

of my father called-one who knows not   
the ,lord4 ,after a few minutes the     
,lord gave me an opportunity of setting 
before him the fundamental truths of the
 ,gospel1 and the joy and comfort they  
afford1 and have afforded to me4 ,thus a
 way was opened to me of stating the    
truth more fully than ever ,i had been  
able to do before1 by word of mouth1 in 
the presence of my father and brother1  
without saying to them1 ,thou art the   
man4 ,i was assisted by the ,lord4 ,may 
,he water the seed sown6 ,this evening  
,i went to the only two brethren in this
 little town1 thus to own them as such4 
,it has appeared well to me to call on  
none whom ,i know1 else ,i should be    
expected to call on all2 and as ,i see  
it right to spend but three days here1  
,i consider that that little time should
 be wholly given to my father1 as it may
 be the last time that ,i shall see him2
 yet1 at the same time1 ,i judged that  
it was well pleasing in the sight of the
 ,lord1 that ,i should call on these    

brethren to strengthen their hands4     
,when ,i saw these brethren last1 in    
,february1 #ahbi1 two or three more used
 to meet with them2 but since then the  
reproach of the cross has driven the    
others back into the world4 ,from that  
time1 these brethren have scarcely seen 
a believer1 and never hear the ,gospel  
preached2 it was therefore a great joy  
to them to see me4 ,they told me that   
the ,lord had blessed my last visit to  
them2 and having been informed of my    
coming1 they were prepared to ask me    
many questions4 ,one of them1 ,knabe1   
about thirty years ago being possessed  
of property1 was persuaded to lay it out
 in coal mines4 ,he joined with two men 
who spent his property1 and after some  
time they became bankrupts1 so that     
there was not money enough to pay the   
workmen and some other creditors1 even  
after all their goods had been sold4    
,this evening brother ,knabe asked me   
what he ought to do about the money     
which had been left unpaid three and    

twenty years2 whether he was still under
 an obligation to pay it1 if he could4  
,my answer was at once that he was1     
being in the sight of the ,lord still a 
debtor1 though cleared by the laws of   
men4 ,he then told me1 that some years  
since some property was left to him1 and
 that he also1 in the years #ahaf1      
#ahag1 and #ahah1 when the corn prices  
were very high1 had laid by some money1 
and that therefore he was fully able to 
pay the debt4 ,he saw immediately that  
this was the right way1 and said that he
 would act accordingly4 ,he added that  
now he saw why he had made so little    
progress in divine things4 ,i have      
learned that this brother has lately    
taken two destitute orphans into his    
house1 whom he entirely supports by the 
labour of his hands 7he earns his bread 
by thrashing corn71 and that the people1
 though they consider him1 on account of
 his love for the ,lord1 a weak and     
foolish person1 yet look upon him with  
respect4  ,april #f4 ,i spent this      

morning in answering questions which my 
father put to me about secular things in
 ,england4 ,this ,i did for the         
following reasons3--#a4 ,i had scarcely 
ever spoken about these things in my    
letters1 indeed so little1 that my      
father told me1 he had often intended to
 ask me whether it was forbidden in     
,england to send letters abroad about   
such matters1 as ,i never wrote about   
them4 ,i had refrained from doing so1   
partly1 on account of want of time2 and1
 partly1 because ,i had better things to
 write about1 wishing to direct his mind
 to the things of ,god4 #b4 ,now1       
however1 ,i spoke on these subjects1    
because ,i particularly desired to be as
 kind1 affectionate1 and obliging as ,i 
conscientiously could1 considering that 
this was the testimony ,i was especially
 called on to give4 ,formerly ,i had    
much pressed the things of ,god on him1 
and not with sufficient tenderness1     
knowing not then experimentally the     
helplessness of the creature4 ,after it 

had pleased the ,lord to show me the    
truth more clearly1 in the summer of    
#ahbi1 ,i wrote in a different way2 but 
in the commencement of the year #ahcc ,i
 felt pressed in spirit once more1 most 
fully1 not so much as a son1 but as a   
servant of ,christ1 to write1 and to    
point out to him minutely his state1    
showing him the danger of his soul1 the 
grounds of which ,i fully laid before   
him4 ,when this1 as formerly1 greatly   
displeased him1 ,i ceased to speak any  
more in this way1 and from that time ,i 
aimed and still aim more and more to    
show him love in action1 as it becomes a
 believing son1 telling him only how    
happy ,i am--how ,i am supported under  
such and such trials--how ,i am not     
caring about certain things as formerly 
,i did--in what an awful state ,i was   
once living1 and how ,god brought me out
 of it2 and how any sinner1 by forsaking
 his evil ways1 and believing on the    
,lord ,jesus1 may be brought to the same
 joy and happiness1 and what a delight  

it would be to me to meet my father at  
last in heaven1 c4 ,since ,i have       
corresponded with him in this way1      
things have been very comfortable1      
though ,i have brought as much truth    
before him as formerly1 and though ,i   
have never sent a letter without        
speaking1 comparatively1 much about     
these things4 ,on the same ground ,i    
have not on this visit spoken directly  
to my father about the state of his     
soul1 though he has more than ever heard
 the truth from my lips4 ,god has indeed
 been with me1 and ,i believe that ,i   
have been led by ,him to pursue this    
course4 ,different1 however1 has been   
the way in which ,i have dealt with my  
unconverted brother2 for the            
relationship in which ,i stand to him is
 a different one4 ,for this afternoon1  
,i not only pointed out to him his      
danger1 but spoke also respecting his   
sins1 and have done so in my letters1   
and intend to do so still1 if the ,lord 
permit4  ,this afternoon brother ,knabe 

called on me4 ,he told me that he had   
already experienced a trial on account  
of his intention to pay the money1 as   
his wife tried to keep him from it1 by  
endeavouring to persuade him that ,god  
does not require him to do such a thing1
 as he has taken two orphan children    
into his house4 ,he nevertheless is     
determined to do it4 ,he saw1 however1  
another difficulty1 which was1 that1    
when he looked over the papers          
containing the names of his creditors1  
it was found that all but three1 out of 
about thirty1 were dead1 and he did not 
know what to do concerning them4 ,i told
 him to go to those places where his    
creditors used to live1 and he might    
find1 perhaps1 some needy widows and    
fatherless children1 whom they had left 
behind2 and1 if not1 he should inquire  
after the lawful heirs1 and pay the     
money to them4 ,he saw with me1 and     
declared his full intention to do so1   
whatever it might cost1 and seemed truly
 glad that ,god at last1 through my     

advice1 had delivered him from this     
burden2 for from time to time the matter
 had pressed on his conscience that he  
ought to do it4--,i spent this evening  
in relating to my father and brother    
some of the ,lord's dealings with me in 
,england1 particularly how ,he has      
graciously provided for my temporal     
wants in answer to prayer1 and they both
 seemed to feel1 for the moment at least
 the blessedness of such a life4  ,april
 #g4 ,i saw brother ,knabe this morning1
 who is still determined to pay the     
money1 though tried by his wife4 ,i     
exhorted him to steadfastness4 ,i also  
saw some persons who called on me to    
hear about ,england1 for every one of   
whom the ,lord gave me a word without   
any effort4 ,it was especially so last  
night4 ,a friend of my father1 a ,roman 
,catholic1 called1 and ,i was enabled to
 set the truths of the gospel before    
him1 with their blessed effects1 without
 entering upon the ,roman ,catholic     
controversy4--,a part of this morning ,i

 spent in walking about with my father  
to see one of his gardens1 and some of  
his fields1 because ,i knew it would    
give him pleasure2 and ,i felt that ,i  
ought in every way to show him kindness 
and attention1 as far as ,i             
conscientiously could4 ,tomorrow1 ,god  
willing1 ,i intend to leave1 and to     
return to ,england4 ,the ,lord1 in ,his 
rich mercy1 in answer to my prayer1 has 
enabled me so to walk before my father1 
and has also impressed what ,i have said
 so far upon his heart1 as to cause him 
to say today1 ,may ,god help me to      
follow your example1 and to act         
according to what you have said to me4  
,april #i4 ,celle4 ,yesterday morning ,i
 drove with my father to ,halberstadt1  
where1 with many tears1 he separated    
from me4 ,i was alone in the mail1 which
 was a great comfort to me4 ,it was a   
solemn time4 ,i found myself again on   
the road to ,brunswick1 which ,i had    
traversed twice in the service of the   
devil1 and now ,i was traveling on it in

 the name of ,jesus4 ,i discerned1 in   
passing1 the inn at ,wolfenbuttel1 from 
whence ,i intended to run away1 and     
where ,i was arrested4 ,how peculiar    
were my feelings6 ,in the evening we    
reached ,brunswick1 from whence we      
started the same night4 ,during the     
night ,i heard a fearfully wicked1 most 
profligate1 infidel1 and scoffing       
conversation between the conducteur and 
a student1 and the only testimony ,i    
gave was1 complete silence all the time4
 ,i arrived here this morning at eight1 
and have been here all the morning1 as  
the mail will not start for ,hamburg    
until four this afternoon4 ,it has been 
far from well with me in my soul today4 
,that awful conversation last night has 
been spiritual poison to me4 ,how's very
 soon do we1 even unconsciously1 receive
 evil6  ,april #aj4 ,hamburg4 ,i arrived
 here at ten this morning4--,april #aa4 
,i went on board last night1 and at     
twelve we sailed4 ,this morning at      
half-past eleven we arrived at          

,cuxhaven1 where we cast anchor1 on     
account of a strong contrary            
wind4--,april #ac4 ,though ,i desired as
 much1 perhaps1 as any of the passengers
 speedily to get to the end of our      
voyage1 longing to get back again to my 
work in ,bristol1 and also to my wife   
and children1 yet ,i was kept in peace2 
and whilst some murmured at the contrary
 wind1 the ,lord enabled me to lift up  
my heart in prayer that ,he would calm  
it1 if it were ,his holy will1 and1     
accordingly1 after a delay of about     
nineteen hours1 we plied again yesterday
 morning1 at seven4 ,at ten ,i was taken
 with sea sickness1 from which ,i had   
been kept during my four previous short 
voyages in answer to prayer2 but this   
time ,i on purpose refrained from       
praying about it1 as ,i did not know    
whether it was better for my health to  
be seasick or not4 ,the sickness        
continued the whole of yesterday4 ,today
 ,i am well4 ,we have fine and calm     
weather4 ,i consider it a mercy that the

 ,lord has allowed me to be sea-sick4   
,april #ae4 ,bristol4 ,yesterday at one 
we landed in ,london4 ,in answer to     
prayer ,i soon obtained my things from  
the ,custom-house1 and reached my       
friends in ,chancery ,lane a little     
before two1 where ,i found a letter from
 my wife1 stating that brother ,craik is
 ill1 having an inflammation in the     
wind-pipe1 and therefore1 humanly       
speaking1 will be unable to preach for  
some time4 ,in consequence of this ,i   
started immediately for ,bristol1 where 
,i arrived this morning4 ,i found       
brother ,craik better than ,i had       
expected1 though completely unable to   
attend to the ministry of the ,word4    
,april #af4 ,today brother ,craik and ,i
 received #aal4 #aes4 #i;d4 each1 being 
a legacy left to us some time since4 ,we
 said once or twice to one another1 that
 perhaps this money might be paid at a  
time when we much needed it4 ,and so it 
is just now4 ,may ,i and all my brethren
 leave the management of all our affairs

 entirely to the ,lord1 who best knows  
what is good for us2 and may it be our  
concern to seek first the kingdom of    
,god and ,his righteousness1 and all    
temporal supplies shall be added to us6 
,may #a4 ,i went to see brother ,craik1 
and found him better1 but heard from his
 medical attendant that he ought not to 
preach for several months4 ,may #e4 ,my 
father-in-law has been for several days 
very ill4 ,may #ae4 ,mr4 ,groves        
continues very ill4 ,may #bi4 ,this     
morning brother ,craik went into        
,devonshire for change of air4  ,june   
#c4 ,today we had a public meeting on   
account of the ,scriptural ,knowledge   
,institution for home and abroad4 ,it is
 now fifteen months1 since1 in          
dependence upon the ,lord for the supply
 of means1 we have been enabled to      
provide poor children with schooling1   
circulate the ,holy ,scriptures1 and aid
 missionary labours4 ,during this time1 
though the field of labour has been     
continually enlarged1 and though we have

 now and then been brought low in funds1
 the ,lord has never allowed us to be   
obliged to stop the work4 ,we have been 
enabled during this time to establish   
three day-schools1 and to connect with  
the ,institution two other charity      
day-schools1 which1 humanly speaking1   
otherwise would have been closed for    
want of means4 ,in addition to this1 the
 expenses connected with a              
,sunday-school and an adult school have 
been likewise defrayed1 making seven    
schools altogether4 ,the number of the  
children that have been thus provided   
with schooling1 in the day-schools only1
 amounts to #dci4 ,the number of copies 
of the ,holy ,scriptures1 which have    
been circulated1 is #gie ,bibles and    
#gec ,new ,testaments4 ,we have also    
sent1 in aid of missionary labours in   
,canada1 in the ,east ,indies1 and on   
the ,continent of ,europe1 #aagl4 #aas4 
,the whole amount of the free-will      
offerings put into our hands for        
carrying on this work1 from ,march #e1  

#ahcd1 to ,may #ai1 #ahce1 is #cfcl4    
#abs4 #j #c_/d;d4  ,june #bj4 ,our      
father is evidently today near his end4 
,june #bb4 ,this morning at two our     
father died4 ,june #bc4 ,both our       
children are ill4 ,june #bd4 ,our little
 boy is very ill4 ,june #be4 ,the dear  
little boy is so ill1 that ,i have no   
hope of his recovery4 ,the disease is   
inflammation on the chest4 ,i spoke this
 evening comfortably at ,gideon1 on     
,psalm cxlv4 #a-d1 thinking it right    
that neither the death of my            
father-in-law1 nor my dying child should
 keep me from the ,lord's work4 ,the    
,lord's holy will be done concerning the
 dear little one4 ,june #bf4 ,my prayer 
last evening was1 that ,god would be    
pleased to support my dear wife under   
the trial1 should ,he remove the little 
one2 and to take him soon to ,himself1  
thus sparing him from suffering4 ,i did 
not pray for the child's recovery4 ,it  
was but two hours after that the dear   
little one went home4 ,the eldest and   

the youngest the ,lord has thus removed 
from our family in the same week4 ,my   
dear ,mary feels her loss much1 but yet 
is greatly supported4 ,as to myself1 ,i 
am so fully enabled to realize that the 
dear infant is so much better off with  
the ,lord ,jesus than with us1 that ,i  
scarcely feel the loss at all1 and when 
,i weep1 ,i weep for joy4  ,june #bg4   
,my dear wife is graciously supported4  
,may the ,lord grant that these         
afflictions may not be lost upon us6    
,june #bh4 ,i preached today both times 
comfortably4 ,june #bi4 ,this morning   
was the funeral4 ,the remains of our    
father and infant were put into the same
 grave4  ,july #c4 ,our taxes are due1  
and may be called for any day1 and for  
the first time we have no money to pay  
them1 as we were obliged1 on account of 
our late afflictions1 to spend the money
 which we had put by for them4 ,may the 
,lord in mercy provide6 ,july #f4 ,i was
 enabled today1 by the free-will        
offerings through the boxes1 and by what

 ,i had left1 to pay the taxes before   
they were called for4 ,how kind of the  
,lord to answer my prayer so soon6 ,july
 #h4 ,this evening ,i had #el4 sent from
 ,weston-super-,mare4 ,so the ,lord has 
again appeared4 ,may ,i praise ,his holy
 name for this seasonable help1 which   
came when ,i had scarcely any money     
left6 ,july #ad4 ,today ,i had again a  
suit of new clothes given to me by a    
brother4 ,my clothes were much worn and 
old1 and our late funeral might have    
given a second reason for having new    
ones4 ,but ,i did not order any1 because
 ,i had no money to pay for them1 and   
thought it wrong to contract debts4--,a 
fresh paper was brought in today for    
taxes1 which ought to have been asked   
for many months since4 ,may the ,lord   
give us the means to pay them6  ,july   
#ae4 ,we had again an especial          
prayer-meeting for the restoration of   
brother ,craik1 who1 though well in his 
general health1 is yet unable to preach1
 or even to converse for any length of  

time4 ,july #ah4 ,i have felt for       
several days weak in my chest4 ,this    
weakness has been increasing1 and today 
,i have felt it more than ever4 ,i have 
thought it well to refrain next week    
from all public speaking4 ,may the ,lord
 grant that ,i may be brought nearer to 
,him through this1 for ,i am not at all 
in the state in which ,i ought to be1   
and ,i think sometimes that our late    
afflictions have been lost upon me1 and 
that the ,lord will need to chastise me 
severely4  ,july #bb4 ,the last         
mentioned taxes were called for this    
morning1 just after the ,lord had sent  
us #el41 from a distance of about eighty
 miles4 ,so the ,lord has again of late1
 repeatedly1 in answer to prayer1 sent  
help4 ,may this lead us to trust in ,him
 for the future6 ,july #bh4 ,since the  
#adth ,i have felt unwell1 and though   
sometimes a little better1 on the whole 
,i have been getting worse and worse4   
,this morning ,i have seen our medical  
attendant1 who thinks that all the      

disease arises from a disordered        
stomach4    ,july #ca4 ,today brother   
,c-r1 formerly a minister in the        
establishment1 who came to us a few days
 since1 began1 in connexion with the    
,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution1 to 
go from house to house1 to spread the   
truth as a city missionary4 ,this was a 
remarkable interposition of ,god4       
,brother ,craik had before this1 for    
some months1 been unable on account of  
bodily infirmity1 to labour in the work 
of the schools1 the circulation of the  
,scriptures1 c41 and my own weakness1   
shortly after brother ,c-r's arrival1   
increased so that ,i was obliged to give
 up the work entirely3 ,how gracious1   
therefore1 of the ,lord1 to send brother
 ,c-r1 that thus the work might go on6  
,up to ,july1 #ahcg1 this brother was   
enabled to continue in his work1 and    
thus this little ,institution was in a  
most important way enlarged as it       
regards the field of labour4  ,august   
#ae4 ,today dear brother ,craik returned

 from ,devonshire1 much better in his   
general health1 but not better as it    
regards his voice4--,august #bd4 ,i feel
 very weak1 and suffer more than before 
from the disease4 ,i am in doubt whether
 to leave ,bristol entirely for a time4 
,i have no money to go away for a change
 of air4 ,i have had an invitation to   
stay for a week with a sister in the    
country1 and ,i think of accepting the  
invitation1 and going tomorrow4 ,august 
#bf4 ,today ,i had #el4 given to me for 
the express purpose of using change of  
air4 ,aug4 #bi4 ,today ,i received      
another #el4 for the same purpose4      
,august #cj4 ,today1 for the first      
,lord's day since our arrival in        
,bristol1 ,i have been kept from        
preaching through illness4 ,how         
mercifully has the ,lord dealt in giving
 me so much strength for these years6 ,i
 had another #el4 sent1 to aid me in    
procuring change of air4 ,how kind is   
the ,lord in thus providing me with the 
means of leaving ,bristol6 ,september   

#b4 ,went with my family to ,portishead4
 ,september #c to #e4 ,i read the lives 
of the ,english martyrs at the time of  
the reformation4 ,my spirit has been    
greatly refreshed4 ,may the ,lord help  
me to follow these holy men as far as   
they followed ,christ6 ,of all reading1 
besides that of the ,holy ,scriptures1  
which should be always ,,the book1 ,,the
 ,,chief book to us1 not merely in      
theory1 but also in practice1 such like 
books seem to me the most useful for the
 growth of the inner man4 ,yet one has  
to be cautious in the choice1 and to    
guard against reading too much4 ,at such
 a time as the present1 when my mind and
 body are too weak for much exertion1 as
 the study of the ,word1 conversation1  
writing letters1 or walking1 c41 ,i find
 it most refreshing to read a few pages 
of this kind1 though these last six     
years ,i have not read the fifth part1  
perhaps not the tenth part as much of   
other books as of the ,holy ,scriptures4
  ,september #ad4 ,we are still at      

,portishead4 ,i am but little better4 ,i
 am greatly bowed down today on account 
of my inward corruptions and carnality  
of heart4 ,when will ,god deliver me    
from this state86 ,how ,i long to be    
more like ,him6 ,my present way of      
living is also a great trial to me4 ,the
 caring so much about the body2 the     
having for my chief employment eating   
and drinking1 walking1 bathing1 and     
taking horse exercise2 all this to which
 ,i have not been at all accustomed     
these six years1 ,i find to be very     
trying4 ,i would much rather be again in
 the midst of the work in ,bristol1 if  
my ,lord will condescend to use ,his    
most unworthy servant4  ,september #ae4 
,as ,i clearly understood that the      
person1 who lets me his horse1 has no   
license1 ,i saw1 that being bound as a  
believer to act according to the laws of
 the country1 ,i could use it no longer3
 and as horse exercise seems most       
important1 humanly speaking1 for my     
restoration1 and as this is the only    

horse1 which is to be had in the place1 
we came to the conclusion to leave      
,portishead tomorrow4 ,immediately      
after1 ,i received a kind letter from a 
brother and two sisters in the ,lord1   
who lived in the ,isle of ,wight1 which 
contained a fourth invitation1 more     
pressing than ever1 to come and stay    
with them for some time4 ,in addition to
 this1 they wrote that they had         
repeatedly prayed about the matter1 and 
were persuaded that ,i ought to come4   
,this matter has been today a subject   
for prayer and consideration to us4     
,september #af4 ,we came this morning to
 the conclusion to leave ,portishead    
today1 and that ,i should go to the     
,isle of ,wight2 but we saw not how my  
wife and child and our servant could    
accompany me1 as we had not sufficient  
money for traveling expenses2 and yet   
this seemed of importance1 as otherwise 
my wife would be overburdened in my     
absence1 and my mind would not be       
sufficiently free2 and besides this1 she

 also seems to need change of air4 ,the 
,lord graciously removed the difficulty 
this evening2 for we received most      
unexpectedly and unasked for #fl4 #acs41
 which was owed to us1 and1 also1 when  
we had already retired to rest1 a letter
 was brought1 containing a present of   
#bl4 ,how very1 very kind1 and tender is
 the ,lord6  ,september #ai4 ,this      
evening we arrived at our friends' in   
the ,isle of ,wight1 by whom we were    
most kindly received4--,september #ba to
 #bf4 ,nothing remarkable has occurred4 
,i feel very comfortable in this place1 
and find my stay here refreshing to my  
soul4 ,my health is about the same4 ,i  
am not fit for mental exercise1 and am  
soon fatigued even by conversation4 ,i  
have read during the last days1 with    
great interest and admiration of the    
goodness of ,god1 and to the refreshment
 of my soul1 the life of ,john ,newton1 
and the lives of some of the ,english   
martyrs at the time of the reformation4 
,sept4 #bg4 ,today ,i am thirty years of

 age4 ,i feel myself an unprofitable    
servant4 ,how much more might ,i have   
lived for ,god than ,i have done6 ,may  
the ,lord grant1 that1 if ,i am allowed 
to stay a few days more in this world1  
they may be spent entirely for ,him6    
,september #bi4 ,last evening1 when ,i  
retired from the family1 ,i had a desire
 to go to rest at once1 for ,i had      
prayed a short while before2 and feeling
 weak in body1 the coldness of the night
 was a temptation for me to pray no     
further4 ,however1 the ,lord did help me
 to fall upon my knees2 and no sooner   
had ,i commenced praying1 than ,he shone
 into my soul1 and gave me such a spirit
 of prayer1 as ,i had not enjoyed for   
many weeks4 ,he graciously once more    
revived ,his work in my heart4 ,i       
enjoyed that nearness to ,god and       
fervency in prayer1 for more than an    
hour1 for which my soul had been panting
 for many weeks past4 ,for the first    
time1 during this illness1 ,i had now   
also a spirit of prayer as it regards my

 health4 ,i could ask the ,lord         
earnestly to restore me again1 which had
 not been the case before4 ,i now long  
to go back again to the work in         
,bristol1 yet without impatience1 and   
feel assured that the ,lord will        
strengthen me to return to it4 ,i went  
to bed especially happy and awoke this  
morning in great peace1 rose sooner than
 usual1 and had again1 for more than an 
hour1 real communion with the ,lord     
before breakfast4 ,may ,he in mercy     
continue this state of heart to ,his    
most unworthy child6  ,october #h4 ,my  
strength has been during the last days  
increasing1 but ,i feel still the       
symptoms of indigestion4 ,i have been   
able to speak several times at family   
prayer1 and to expound the ,scriptures  
to the school children1 without         
suffering in consequence of it4         
,october #i4 ,i have many times had     
thoughts of giving in print some account
 of the ,lord's goodness to me1 for the 
instruction1 comfort1 and encouragement 

of the children of ,god2 and ,i have    
been more than ever stirred up to do so 
since ,i read ,newton's life a few days 
ago4 ,i have considered1 today1 all the 
reasons for and against1 and find that  
there are scarcely any against1 and many
 for it4  ,october #ae4 ,today we left  
our dear friends for ,bristol4 ,november
 #ae4 ,brother ,c-r and ,i have been    
praying together1 the last five days1   
that the ,lord would be pleased to send 
us means for the carrying on of the work
 of the ,scriptural ,knowledge          
,institution4 ,this evening a brother   
gave me #fs4 #a;d41 being money which he
 formerly used to pay towards the       
support of a trade club1 which he has   
lately given up for the ,lord's         
sake4--,november #ah4 ,this evening     
,l#cj was given to me2 ,l#be4 for the   
,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution1 and
 ,l#e4 for myself4 ,this is a most      
remarkable answer to prayer4 ,brother   
,c-r and ,i have prayed repeatedly      
together during the last week1          

concerning the work1 and especially that
 the ,lord would be pleased to give us  
the means to continue1 and even to      
enlarge1 the field4 ,in addition to     
this1 ,i have several times asked for a 
supply for myself1 and ,he has kindly   
granted both these requests4 ,oh that ,i
 may have grace to trust ,him more and  
more6--,november #bj4 ,this evening ,i  
took tea at a sister's house1 where ,i  
found ,franke's life4 ,i have           
frequently1 for a long time1 thought of 
labouring in a similar way1 though it   
might be on a much smaller scale2 not1  
to imitate ,franke1 but in reliance upon
 the ,lord4 ,may ,god make it plain6    
,november #ba4 ,today ,i have had it    
very much impressed on my heart1 no     
longer merely to think about the        
establishment of an ,orphan-,house1 but 
actually to set about it1 and ,i have   
been very much in prayer respecting it1 
in order to ascertain the ,lord's       
mind4--,i received this day1 from an    
unexpected quarter1 ,l#e4 for the       

,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution1 in 
answer to prayer2  and ,i had also ,l#a4
 #ads4 #f;d4 sent from a distance of one
 hundred and twenty miles4-,november    
#bb4 ,this evening ,i had sent for the  
,institution ,l#a4 #ds4--,november #bc4 
,today ,i had ,l#aj4 sent from ,ireland 
for our ,institution4 ,thus the ,lord1  
in answer to prayer1 has given me1 in a 
few days1 about ,l#ej4 ,i had asked only
 for ,l#dj4 ,this has been a great      
encouragement to me1 and has still more 
stirred me up to think and pray about   
the establishment of an                 
,orphan-,house4--,november #be4 ,i have 
been again much in prayer yesterday and 
today about the ,orphan-,house1 and am  
more and more convinced that it is of   
,god4 ,may ,he in mercy guide me6 ,the  
three chief reasons for establishing an 
,orphan-,house are3--#a4 ,that ,god may 
be glorified1 should ,he be pleased to  
furnish me with the means1 in its being 
seen that it is not a vain thing to     
trust in ,him2 and that thus the faith  

of ,his children may be strengthened4   
#b4 ,the spiritual welfare of fatherless
 and motherless children4 #c4 ,their    
temporal welfare4  ,it may be well to   
enter somewhat more minutely1 than my   
journal does1 upon the reasons which led
 me to establish an ,orphan-,house4     
,through my pastoral labours among the  
saints in ,bristol1 through my          
considerable correspondence1 and through
 brethren who visited ,bristol2 ,i had  
constantly cases brought before me1     
which proved1 that one of the especial  
things which the children of ,god needed
 in our day1 was1 to have their faith   
strengthened4 ,for instance3 ,i might   
visit a brother1 who worked fourteen or 
even sixteen hours a day at his trade1  
the necessary result of which was1 that 
not only his body suffered1 but his soul
 was lean1 and he had no enjoyment in   
the things of ,god4 ,under such         
circumstances ,i might point out to him 
that he ought to work less1 in order    
that his bodily health might not suffer1

 and that he might gather strength for  
his inner man1 by reading the word of   
,god1 by meditation over it1 and by     
prayer4 ,the reply1 however1 ,i         
generally found to be something like    
this3 ,but if ,i work less1 ,i do not   
earn enough for the support of my       
family4 ,even now1 whilst ,i work so    
much1 ,i have scarcely enough4 ,the     
wages are so low1 that ,i must work hard
 in order to obtain what ,i need4 ,there
 was no trust in ,god4 ,no real belief  
in the truth of that word3 ,seek ye     
first the kingdom of ,god1 and ,his     
righteousness3 and all these things     
shall be added unto you4 ,i might reply 
something like this3 ,my dear brother1  
it is not your work which supports your 
family1 but the ,lord2 and ,he who has  
fed you and your family when you could  
not work at all1 on account of illness1 
would surely provide for you and yours1 
if for the sake of obtaining food for   
your inner man1 you were to work only   
for so many hours a day1 as would allow 

you proper time for retirement4 ,and is 
it not the case now1 that you begin the 
work of the day after having had only a 
few hurried moments for prayer2 and when
 you leave off your work in the evening1
 and mean then to read a little of the  
word of ,god1 are you not too much worn 
out in body and mind1 to enjoy it1 and  
do you not often fall asleep whilst     
reading the ,scriptures1 or whilst on   
your knees in prayer8 ,the brother would
 allow it was so2 he would allow that my
 advice was good2 but still ,i read in  
his countenance1 even if he should not  
have actually said so1 ,how should ,i   
get on1 if ,i were to carry out your    
advice8 ,i longed1 therefore1 to have   
something to point the brother to1 as a 
visible proof1 that our ,god and ,father
 is the same faithful ,god as ever ,he  
was2 as willing as ever to ,,prove      
,himself to be the ,,living ,,god1 in   
our day as formerly1 to all who put     
their trust in ,him4--,again1 sometimes 
,i found children of ,god tried in mind 

by the prospect of old age1 when they   
might be unable to work any longer1 and 
therefore were harassed by the fear of  
having to go into the poor-house4 ,if in
 such a case ,i pointed out to them1 how
 their ,heavenly ,father has always     
helped those who put their trust in     
,him1 they might not1 perhaps1 always   
say1 that times have changed2 but yet it
 was evident enough1 that ,god was not  
looked upon by them as the ,,living     
,god4 ,my spirit was ofttimes bowed down
 by this1 and ,i longed to set something
 before the children of ,god1 whereby   
they might see1 that ,he does not       
forsake1 even in our day1 those who rely
 upon him4--,another class of persons   
were brethren in business1 who suffered 
in their souls1 and brought guilt on    
their consciences1 by carrying on their 
business1 almost in the same way1 as    
unconverted persons do4 ,the competition
 in trade1 the bad times1 the           
over-peopled country1 were given as     
reasons why1 ,if the business were      

carried on simply according to the word 
of ,god1 it could not be expected to do 
well4 ,such a brother1 perhaps1 would   
express the wish1 that he might be      
differently situated2 but very rarely   
did ,i see1 that there was a stand made 
for ,god1 that there was the holy       
determination to trust in the living    
,god1 and to depend on ,him1 in order   
that a good conscience might be         
maintained4 ,to this class likewise ,i  
desired to show1 by a visible proof1    
that ,god is unchangeably the           
same4--,then there was another class of 
persons1 individuals who were in        
professions in which they could not     
continue with a good conscience1 or     
persons who were in an unscriptural     
position with reference to spiritual    
things2 but both classes feared1 on     
account of the consequences1 to give up 
the profession in which they could not  
abide with ,god1 or to leave their      
position1 lest they should be thrown out
 of employment4 ,my spirit longed to be 

instrumental in strengthening their     
faith1 by giving them not only instances
 from the word of ,god1 of ,his         
willingness and ability to help all     
those who rely upon ,him1 but to show   
them by proofs1 that ,he is the same in 
our day4 ,i well knew that the word of  
,god ought to be enough1 and it was1 by 
grace1 enough to me2 but still1 ,i      
considered that ,i aught to lend a      
helping hand to my brethren1 if by any  
means1 by this visible proof to the     
unchangeable faithfulness of the ,lord  
,i might strengthen their hands in ,god2
 for ,i remembered what a great blessing
 my own soul had received through the   
,lord's dealings with ,his servant ,a4  
,h4 ,franke1 who1 in dependence upon the
 living ,god alone1 established an      
immense ,orphan-,house1 which ,i had    
seen many times with my own eyes4 ,i1   
therefore1 judged myself bound to be the
 servant of the ,church of ,christ1 in  
the particular point on which ,i had    
obtained mercy3 namely1 in being able to

 take ,god by ,his word and to rely upon
 it4 ,all these exercises of my soul1   
which resulted from the fact that so    
many believers1 with whom ,i became     
acquainted1 were harassed and distressed
 in mind1 or brought guilt on their     
consciences1 on account of not trusting 
in the ,lord2 were used by ,god to      
awaken in my heart the desire of setting
 before the church at large1 and before 
the world1 a proof that ,he has not in  
the least changed2 and this seemed to me
 best done1 by the establishing of an   
,orphan-,house4 ,it needed to be        
something which could be seen1 even by  
the natural eye4 ,now1 if ,i1 a poor    
man1 simply by prayer and faith1        
obtained1 without asking any individual1
 the means for establishing and carrying
 on an ,orphan-,house3 there would be   
something which with the ,lord's        
blessing1 might be instrumental in      
strengthening the faith of the children 
of ,god besides being a testimony to the
 consciences of the unconverted1 of the 

reality of the things of ,god4 ,this1   
then1 was the primary reason1 for       
establishing the ,orphan-,house4 ,i     
certainly did from my heart desire to be
 used by ,god to benefit the bodies of  
poor children1 bereaved of both parents1
 and seek1 in other respects1 with the  
help of ,god1 to do them good for this  
life2--,i also particularly longed to be
 used by ,god in getting the dear       
orphans trained up in the fear of       
,god2--but still1 the first and primary 
object of the work was1 7and still is37 
that ,god might be magnified by the     
fact1 that the orphans under my care are
 provided1 with all they need1 only by  
prayer and faith1 without any one being 
asked by me or my fellow-labourers1     
whereby it may be seen1 that ,god is    
,,faithful ,,still1 and ,,hears ,,prayer
 ,,still4 ,that ,i was not mistaken1 has
 been abundantly proved singe ,november1
 #ahce1 both by the conversion of many  
sinners who have read the accounts1     
which have been published in connexion  

with this work1 and also by the         
abundance of fruit that has followed in 
the hearts of the saints1 for which1    
from my inmost soul1 ,i desire to be    
grateful to ,god1 and the honour and    
glory of which not only is due to ,him  
alone1 but which ,i1 by ,his help1 am   
enabled to ascribe to ,him4  ,november  
#bh4 ,i have been1 every day this week1 
very much in prayer concerning the      
,orphan-,house1 chiefly entreating the  
,lord to take away every thought        
concerning it out of my mind1 if the    
matter be not of ,him2 and have also    
repeatedly examined my heart concerning 
my motives in the matter4 ,but ,i have  
been more and more confirmed that it is 
of ,god4  ,december #b4 ,i have again   
these last days prayed much about the   
,orphan-,house1 and have frequently     
examined my heart1 that if it were at   
all my desire to establish it for the   
sake of gratifying myself ,i might find 
it out4 ,to that end ,i have also       
conversed with brother ,craik about it1 

that he might be instrumental in showing
 me any hidden corruption of my heart   
concerning the matter1 or any other     
scriptural reason against my engaging in
 it4 ,the one only reason which ever    
made me at all doubt as to its being of 
,god1 that ,i should engage in this     
work1 is1 the multiplicity of           
engagements which ,i have already4 ,but 
that which has overbalanced this        
objection in my mind has been3--#a4     
,that the matter is of such great       
importance4 #b4 ,that if the matter be  
of ,god1 ,he will in due time send      
suitable individuals1 so that           
comparatively little of my time will be 
taken up in this service4  ,this morning
 ,i asked the ,lord especially1 that ,he
 would be pleased to teach me through   
the instrumentality of brother ,c42 and 
,i went to him1 that he might have an   
opportunity of probing my heart4 ,for as
 ,i desire only the ,lord's glory1 ,i   
should be glad to be instructed through 
the instrumentality of any brother1 if  

the matter be not of ,him4 ,but brother 
,c41 on the contrary1 greatly encouraged
 me in it4 ,therefore ,i have this day  
taken the first actual step in the      
matter1 in having ordered bills to be   
printed1 announcing a public meeting on 
,december #ith1 at which ,i intend to   
lay before the brethren my thoughts     
concerning the ,orphan-,house1 as a     
means of ascertaining more clearly the  
,lord's mind concerning the matter4     
,december #d4 ,brother ,craik told me   
this morning1 that his voice is getting 
a little better4 ,december #e4 ,this    
evening ,i was struck1 in reading the   
,scriptures1 with these words3 ,open thy
 mouth wide1 and ,i will fill it4 ,ps4  
lxxxi4 #aj4 ,up to this day ,i had not  
prayed at all concerning the means or   
individuals needed for the              
,orphan-,house4 ,i was now led to apply 
this scripture to the ,orphan-,house1   
and asked the ,lord for premises1       
#ajjjl41 and suitable individuals to    
take care of the children4 ,december #g4

 ,today ,i received the first shilling  
for the ,orphan-,house4 ,afterwards ,i  
received another shilling from a ,german
 brother4  ,december #i4 ,this afternoon
 the first piece of furniture was       
given--a large wardrobe4 ,this afternoon
 and evening ,i was low in spirit as it 
regards the ,orphan-,house1 but as soon 
as ,i began to speak at the meeting1 ,i 
received peculiar assistance from ,god1 
felt great peace and joy1 and the       
assurance that the work is of ,god4     
,after the meeting1 #ajs4 was given to  
me4 ,there was purposely no collection1 
nor did any one speak besides myself2   
for it was not in the least intended to 
work upon the feelings1 for ,i sought to
 be quite sure concerning the mind of   
,god4 ,after the meeting a sister       
offered herself for the work4 ,i went   
home happy in the ,lord1 and full of    
confidence that the matter will come to 
pass1 though but #ajs4 has been given4  
,december #aj4 ,this morning ,i have    
sent to the press a statement which     

contains the substance of what ,i said  
at the meeting last evening4 ,for the   
sake of those who have not read it      
before1 it is given here4  ,proposal for
 the ,establishment of an ,orphan-,house
 in connexion with the ,scriptural      
,knowledge ,institution for ,home and   
,abroad4  ,since the last ,report of the
 operations of the ,scriptural          
,knowledge ,institution for home and    
abroad was published1 the ,lord has sent
 us1 in answer to prayer1 brother ,john 
,c-r1 formerly a minister of the        
establishment1 as a city missionary1 who
 goes from house to house1 among the    
poor of this city1 to converse with them
 about the things of ,god1 to circulate 
the ,scriptures among them1 to get them 
to come to the adult school1 if they    
cannot read1 and to advise them to put  
their children to our schools1 provided 
they go to no other4 ,it was            
particularly gracious of the ,lord to   
send this brother1 nearly five months   
ago1 as my brother and fellow labourer1 

,henry ,craik1 has been for these eight 
months laid aside from the ministry of  
the ,word on account of bodily          
infirmity1 and has therefore been unable
 to take an active part in this         
,institution4 ,thus ,i have not only    
found great help1 but ,i have been      
greatly encouraged to enlarge the field4
 ,that to which my mind has been        
particularly directed1 is1 to establish 
an ,orphan-,house in which destitute    
fatherless and motherless children may  
be provided with food and raiment1 and  
scriptural education4 ,concerning this  
intended ,orphan-,house ,i would say    
#a4 ,it is intended to be in connexion  
with the ,scriptural ,knowledge         
,institution for home and abroad1 in so 
far as it respects the ,reports1        
accounts1 superintendence1 and the      
principles on which it is conducted1 so 
that1 in one sense1 it may be considered
 as a new object of the ,institution1   
yet with this difference1 that only     
those funds shall be applied to the     

,orphan-,house which are expressly given
 for it4 ,if1 therefore1 any believer   
should prefer to support either those   
objects which have been hitherto        
assisted by the funds of this           
,institution1 or the intended           
,orphan-,house1 it need only be         
mentioned1 in order that the money may  
be applied accordingly4  #b4 ,it will   
only be established if the ,lord should 
provide both the means for it1 and      
suitable persons to conduct it4  ,as to 
the means1 ,i would make the following  
remarks4 ,the reason for proposing to   
enlarge the field1 is not because we    
have of late particularly abounded in   
means2 for we have been rather          
straitened4 ,the many gracious answers1 
however1 which the ,lord had given us   
concerning this ,institution1 led       
brother ,c-r and me to give ourselves to
 prayer1 asking him to supply us with   
the means to carry on the work1 as we   
consider it unscriptural to contract    
debts4 ,during five days1 we prayed     

several times1 both unitedly and        
separately4 ,after that time1 the ,lord 
began to answer our prayers1 so that1   
within a few days1 about #ejl4 was given
 to us4 ,i would further say1 that the  
very gracious and tender dealings of    
,god with me1 in having supplied1 in    
answer to prayer1 for the last five     
years1 my own temporal wants without any
 certain income1 so that money1         
provisions and clothes have been sent to
 me at times when ,i was greatly        
straitened1 and that not only in small  
but large quantities2 and not merely    
from individuals living in the same     
place with me1 but at a considerable    
distance2 and that not merely from      
intimate friends1 but from individuals  
whom ,i have never seen3 all this1 ,i   
say1 has often led me to think1 even as 
long as four years ago1 that the ,lord  
had not given me this simple reliance on
 ,him merely for myself2 but also for   
others4 ,often1 when ,i saw poor        
neglected children running about the    

streets at ,teignmouth1 ,i said to      
myself3 ,may it not be the will of ,god1
 that ,i should establish schools for   
these children1 asking ,him to give me  
the means8 ,however1 it remained only a 
thought in my mind for two or three     
years4 ,about two years and six months  
since ,i was particularly stirred up    
afresh to do something for destitute    
children1 by seeing so many of them     
begging in the streets of ,bristol1 and 
coming to our door4 ,it was not1 then1  
left undone on account of want of trust 
in the ,lord1 but through an abundance  
of other things calling for all the time
 and strength of my brother ,craik and  
myself2 for the ,lord had both given    
faith1 and had also shown by the        
following instance1 in addition to very 
many others1 both what ,he can and what 
,he will do4 ,one morning1 whilst       
sitting in my room1 ,i thought about the
 distress of certain brethren1 and said 
thus to myself3--,o that it might please
 the ,lord to give me the means to help 

these poor brethren6 ,about an hour     
afterwards ,i had #fjl4 sent as a       
present for myself1 from a brother1 whom
 up to this day ,i have never seen1 and 
who was then1 and is still1 residing    
several thousand miles from this4       
,should not such an experience1 together
 with promises like that one in ,john   
xiv4 #ac1 #ad1 encourage us to ask with 
all boldness1 for ourselves and others1 
both temporal and spiritual blessings8  
,the ,lord1 for ,i cannot but think it  
was ,he1 again and again1 brought the   
thought about these poor children to my 
mind1 till at last it ended in the      
establishment of ,the ,scriptural       
,knowledge ,institution1 for ,home and  
,abroad2 since the establishment of     
which1 ,i have had it in a similar way  
brought to my mind1 first about fourteen
 months ago1 and repeatedly since1 but  
especially during these last weeks1 to  
establish an ,orphan-,house4 ,my        
frequent prayer of late has been1 that  
if it be of ,god1 ,he would let it come 

to pass2 if not1 that ,he would take    
from me all thoughts about it4 ,the     
latter has not been the case1 but ,i    
have been led more and more to think    
that the matter may be of ,him4 ,now1 if
 so1 ,he can influence ,his people in   
any part of the world1 7for ,i do not   
look to ,bristol1 nor even to ,england1 
but to the living ,god1 whose is the    
gold and the silver17 to intrust me and 
brother ,c-r1 whom the ,lord has made   
willing to help me in this work1 with   
the means4 ,till we have them1 we can do
 nothing in the way of renting a house1 
furnishing it1 c4 ,yet1 when once as    
much as is needed for this has been sent
 us1 as also proper persons to engage in
 the work1 we do not think it needful to
 wait till we have the ,orphan-,house   
endowed1 or a number of yearly          
subscribers for it2 but we trust to be  
enabled by the ,lord1 who has taught us 
to ask for our daily bread1 to look to  
,him for the supply of the daily wants  
of those children whom ,he may be       

pleased to put under our care4 ,any     
donations will be received at my house4 
,should any believers have tables1      
chairs1 bedsteads1 bedding1 earthenware1
 or any kind of household furniture to  
spare1 for the furnishing of the house2 
or remnants or pieces of calico1 linen1 
flannel1 cloth1 or any materials useful 
for wearing apparel2 or clothes already 
worn2 they will be thankfully received4 
,respecting the persons who are needed  
for carrying on the work1 a matter of no
 less importance than the procuring of  
funds1 ,i would observe1 that we look   
for them to ,god ,himself1 as well as   
for the funds2 and that all who may be  
engaged as masters1 matrons1 and        
assistants1 according to the smallness  
or largeness of the ,institution1 must  
be known to us as true believers2 and   
moreover1 as far as we may be able to   
judge1 must likewise be qualified for   
the work4  #c4 ,at present nothing can  
be said as to the time when the         
operations are likely to commence2 nor  

whether the ,institution will embrace   
children of both sexes1 or be restricted
 either to boys or girls exclusively2   
nor of what age they will be received1  
and how long they may continue in it2   
for though we have thought about these  
things1 yet we would rather be guided in
 these particulars by the amount of the 
means which the ,lord may put into our  
hands1 and by the number of the         
individuals whom he may provide for     
conducting the ,institution4 ,should the
 ,lord condescend to use us as          
instruments1 a short printed statement  
will be issued as soon as something more
 definite can be said4  #d4 ,it has     
appeared well to us to receive only such
 destitute children as have been        
bereaved of both parents4  #e4 ,the     
children are intended1 if girls1 to be  
brought up for service2 if boys1 for a  
trade2 and therefore they will be       
employed1 according to their ability and
 bodily strength1 in useful occupations1
 and thus help to maintain themselves2  

besides this they are intended to       
receive a plain education2 but the chief
 and especial end of the ,institution   
will be to seek1 with ,god's blessing1  
to bring them to the knowledge of ,jesus
 ,christ1 by instructing them in the    
,scriptures4  ,,george ,,muller4        
,bristol1 ,dec4 #ajth1 #ahce4  ,december
 #aa4 ,i have been enabled to pray all  
this week with increased confidence     
concerning the ,orphan-,house1 as it    
regards means1 a house1 suitable        
individuals to take care of the         
children1 furniture1 c4 ,december #af4  
,brother ,c-n1 whom the ,lord has kindly
 allowed to stay above two months among 
us1 to supply brother ,craik's lack of  
service1 left us today4 ,how very       
gracious has the ,lord been to us in    
this affliction6 ,many brethren have    
been sent to us as helpers for a little 
while--brother ,c-t for the greater part
 of the time1 and brother ,c-n for more 
than two months4 ,and1 in addition to   
this1 when brother ,craik and ,i were   

both ill1 the brethren were kept in     
peace1 and there was a spirit of prayer 
among them4 ,december #ca4 ,this evening
 we had an especial meeting for prayer  
and praise4 ,we continued together from 
seven till after twelve4  ,there have   
been received into the church at ,gideon
 during the past year--#bi  ,ditto1     
,bethesda--#cj  ,altogether--#ei  ,of   
these #ei1 #cj have been brought to the 
knowledge of the ,lord through the      
instrumentality of brother ,craik and   
me4 ,there are now1 of those who have   
been begotten again through us1 since we
 have been in ,bristol1 at ,gideon #fc1 
and at ,bethesda #ga--;altogether #acd4 
,besides this1 several have fallen      
asleep in the faith1 who never were in  
communion with us1 and several of our   
spiritual children have joined other    
churches1 in and out of ,bristol1 and   
many are now standing as hopeful        
characters on the list of candidates for
 communion4 ,there have been added to   
the church at ,gideon1 since we came1   

#abe2 to ,bethesda1 #afc--;altogether   
#bhh2 so that the number of both        
churches would have been #cef 7#fh      
believers we found at ,gideon71 had     
there been no changes2 but  ,of ,gideon 
are at present  under church discipline 
#f1 of ,bethesda1 #g1 altogether1 #ac   
,do4 have fallen asleep #ab do4 #e do4  
#ag  ,do4 have left ,bristol #aj do4 #d 
do4 #ad  ,do4 have left us1 but are     
still in ,bristol #aa do4 #d do4 #ae    
#ci #bj #ei  ,so that there are at      
present in communion with us #big3--adc 
at ,bethesda1 and #aed at ,gideon4  ,as 
it regards the way in which the ,lord1  
in ,his faithful love1 supplied my      
temporal wants1 during the past year1 ,i
 mention that ,i received--  #a4 ,in    
free-will offerings1 given through the  
boxes1 as my part ,l#acj #cs4 #g        
#a_/d;d4  #b4 ,in free-will offerings   
given by believers in and out of        
,bristol1 not through the boxes ,l#abj  
#gs4 #f;d4  #c4 ,towards the house rent 
,i received from brother ,craik1 in     

consideration that he has no rent to    
pay1 for nine months ,l#g #ajs4 #j;d4   
#d4 ,the presents sent to us in clothes 
and provisions1 c41 were worth to us at 
least ,l#bg #js4 #j;d4  ,altogether     
,l#bhe #as4 #a #a_/d;d4  ,january #c1   
#ahcf4 ,this morning brother ,craik     
spoke a little in public for the first  
time after about nine months4  ,january 
#f4 ,today we had three especial prayer 
meetings1 for the full restoration of   
brother ,craik's voice4 ,we had also1 on
 ,january #g1 #h1 #i1 and #aj1 especial 
prayer meetings for brother ,craik's    
full restoration4 ,january #af4 ,today  
,i put into the press another statement1
 containing a further account respecting
 the ,orphan-,house4 ,it is here        
reprinted4  ,further account respecting 
the ,orphan-,house1 intended to be      
established in ,bristol1 in connection  
with the ,scriptural ,knowledge         
,institution for ,home and ,abroad4     
,when1 of late1 the thoughts of         
establishing an ,orphan-,house1 in      

dependence upon the ,lord1 revived in my
 mind1 during the first two weeks ,i    
only prayed1 that1 if it were of the    
,lord1 ,he would bring it about2 but1 if
 not1 that ,he graciously would be      
pleased to take all thoughts about it   
out of my mind4 ,my uncertainty about   
knowing the ,lord's mind did not arise  
from questioning whether it would be    
pleasing in ,his sight1 that there      
should be an abode and scriptural       
education provided for destitute        
fatherless and motherless children2 but 
whether it were ,his will that ,i should
 be the instrument of setting such an   
object on foot1 as my hands were already
 more than filled4 ,my comfort1 however1
 was1 that1 if it were ,his will1 ,he   
would provide not merely the means1 but 
also suitable individuals to take care  
of the children1 so that my part of the 
work would take only such a portion of  
my time1 as1 considering the importance 
of the matter1 ,i might give1           
notwithstanding my many other           

engagements4 ,the whole of those two    
weeks ,i never asked the ,lord for      
money1 or for persons to engage in the  
work4 ,on ,december #eth1 however1 the  
subject of my prayer all at once became 
different4 ,i was reading ,psalm lxxxi1 
and was particularly struck1 more than  
at any time before1 with ver4 #aj3 ,open
 thy mouth wide1 and ,i will fill it4 ,i
 thought a few moments about these      
words1 and then was led to apply them to
 the case of the ,orphan-house4 ,it     
struck me that ,i had never asked the   
,lord for any thing concerning it1      
except to know ,his will respecting its 
being established or not2 and ,i then   
fell on my knees1 and opened my mouth   
wide1 asking ,him for much4 ,i asked in 
submission to ,his will1 and without    
fixing a time when ,he should answer my 
petition4 ,i prayed that ,he would give 
me a house1 i4e4 either as a loan1 or   
that some one might be led to pay the   
rent for one1 or that one might be given
 permanently for this object2 further1  

,i asked ,him for ,l#ajjj2 and likewise 
for suitable individuals to take care of
 the children4 ,besides this1 ,i have   
been since led to ask the ,lord1 to put 
into the hearts of ,his people to send  
me articles of furniture for the house1 
and some clothes for the children4 ,when
 ,i was asking the petition1 ,i was     
fully aware what ,i was doing1 i4e41    
that ,i was asking for something which  
,i had no natural prospect of obtaining 
from the brethren whom ,i know1 but     
which was not too much for the ,lord to 
grant4 ,as ,i have stated1 that ,i      
desire to see clearly the ,lord's will  
concerning the ,orphan-,house1 by ,his  
providing both the means and suitable   
individuals for it1 ,i will now mention 
how ,he has been dealing with me in     
these respects4  ,december #g1          
#ahce4--;,anonymously was given #bs4 ,in
 the paper in which they were enclosed  
was written #as4 for the ,orphan-,house1
 and #as4 for the ,scriptural ,knowledge
 ,institution4 ,in the name of the ,lord

 alone lift up your banners1 so shall   
you prosper4 #as4 besides was given4    
,december #i4 ,i found #cs4 in the box1 
which ,i had put up two days before in  
my room for the ,orphan-,house1 and a   
large wardrobe given just before the    
meeting in the evening1 when ,i stated  
publicly my desire concerning this      
object before the brethren4 ,after the  
meeting #ajs4 was given4 ,also a sister 
offered herself at the same time for the
 work4 ,december #aj4 ,this morning ,i  
received a letter1 in which a brother   
and sister wrote thus3--,we propose     
ourselves for the service of the        
intended ,orphan-,house1 if you think us
 qualified for it2 also to give up all  
the furniture1 c41 which the ,lord has  
given us1 for its use2 and to do this   
without receiving any salary whatever2  
believing1 that if it be the will of the
 ,lord to employ us1 ,he will supply all
 our need1 c4 ,in the evening a brother 
brought from several individuals three  
dishes1 #bh plates1 three basins1 one   

jug1 four mugs1 three salt stands1 one  
grater1 four knives1 and five forks4    
,december #ab4 ,while ,i was praying    
this morning that the ,lord would give  
us a fresh token of ,his favour         
concerning the ,orphan-,house1 a brother
 brought three dishes1 #ab plates1 one  
basin1 and one blanket4 ,after this had 
been given1 ,i thanked ,god1 and asked  
,him to give even this day another      
encouragement4 ,shortly after1 ,l#ej4   
was given1 and that by an individual    
from whom1 for several reasons1 ,i could
 not have expected this sum4 ,thus the  
hand of ,god appeared so much the more  
clearly4 ,even then ,i was led to pray1 
that this day the ,lord would give still
 more4 ,in the evening1 accordingly1    
there were sent #bi yards of print4     
,also a sister offered herself for the  
work4 ,dec4 #ac4 ,a brother was         
influenced this day to give #ds4 per    
week1 or #ajl4 #hs4 yearly1 as long as  
the ,lord gives the means2 #hs4 was     
given by him as two weeks'              

subscriptions4 ,today a brother and     
sister offered themselves1 with all     
their furniture1 and all the provisions 
which they have in the house1 if they   
can be usefully employed in the concerns
 of the ,orphan-,house4  ,december #ad4 
,today a sister offered her services for
 the work4 ,in the evening another      
sister offered herself for the          
,institution4 ,december #ae4 ,a sister  
brought from several friends1 ten       
basins1 eight mugs1 one plate1 five     
dessert spoons1 six tea spoons1 one     
skimmer1 one toasting fork1 one flour   
dredge1 three knives and forks1 one     
sheet1 one pillow case1 one table cloth2
 also #al4 ,in the afternoon were sent  
#ee yards of sheeting1 and #ab yards of 
calico4 ,december #af4 ,i took out of   
the box in my room #as4 ,december #ag4  
,i was rather cast down last evening and
 this morning about the matter1         
questioning whether ,i ought to be      
engaged in this way1 and was led to ask 
the ,lord to give me some further       

encouragement4 ,soon after were sent by 
a brother two pieces of print1 the one  
seven and the other #bc #c_/d yards1 #f 
#c_/d yards of calico1 four pieces of   
lining1 about four yards altogether1 a  
sheet1 and a yard measure4 ,this evening
 another brother brought a clothes'     
horse1 three frocks1 four pinafores1 six
 handkerchiefs1 three counterpanes1 one 
blanket1 two pewter salt cellars1 six   
tin cups1 and six metal tea spoons2 he  
also brought #cs4 #f;d4 given to him by 
three different individuals4 ,at the    
same time he told me that it had been   
put into the heart of an individual to  
send tomorrow #ajjl4  ,december #ah4    
,this afternoon the same brother brought
 from a sister1 a counterpane1 a flat   
iron stand1 eight cups1 and saucers1 a  
sugar basin1 a milk jug1 a tea cup1 #af 
thimbles1 five knives and forks1 six    
dessert spoons1 #ab tea spoons1 four    
combs1 and two little graters2 from     
another friend a flat iron and a cup and
 saucer4 ,at the same time he brought   

the #ajjl4 above referred to4 ,since the
 publication of the second edition it   
has pleased the ,lord to take to        
,himself the donor of this #ajjl41 and  
,i therefore give in this present       
edition some further account of the     
donation and the donor1 as the          
particulars respecting both1 with ,god's
 blessing1 may tend to edification4     
,indeed ,i confess that ,i am delighted 
to be at liberty1 in consequence of the 
death of the donor1 to give the         
following short narrative1 which1 during
 her lifetime1 ,i should not have       
considered it wise to publish4 ,a4 ,l41 
the donor1 was known to me almost from  
the beginning of my coming to ,bristol  
in #ahcb4 ,she earned her bread by      
needlework1 by which she gained from    
#bs4 to #es4 per week2 the average1 ,i  
suppose1 was not more than about #cs4   
#f;d41 as she was weak in body4 ,but    
this dear1 humble sister was content    
with her small earnings1 and ,i do not  
remember ever to have heard her utter a 

word of complaint on account of earning 
so little4 ,some time1 before ,i had    
been led to establish an ,orphan-,house1
 her father had died1 through which     
event she had come into the possession  
of #dhjl41 which sum had been left to   
her 7and the same amount to her brother 
and two sisters7 by her grandmother1 but
 of which her father had had the        
interest during his lifetime4 ,the      
father1 who had been much given to      
drinking1 died in debt1 which debts the 
children wished to pay2 but the rest1   
besides ,a4 ,l41 did not like to pay the
 full amount1 and offered to the        
creditors #es4 in the pound1 which they 
gladly accepted1 as they had not the    
least legal claim upon the children4    
,after the debts had been paid according
 to this agreement1 ,a4 ,l4 said to     
herself2 ,however sinful my father may  
have been1 yet he was my father1 and as 
,i have the means of paying his debts to
 the full amount1 ,i ought1 as a        
believing child1 to do so1 seeing that  

my brothers and sisters will not do it4 
,she then went to all the creditors     
secretly1 and paid the full amount of   
the debts1 which took #djl4 more of her 
money1 besides her share which she had  
given before4 ,her brother and two      
sisters now gave #ejl4 each of their    
property to their mother2 but ,a4 ,l4   
said to herself3 ,i am a child of ,god1 
surely ,i ought to give my mother twice 
as much as my brother and sisters4 ,she1
 therefore1 gave her mother #ajjl4      
,shortly after this she sent me the     
#ajjl4 towards the ,orphan-,house4 ,i   
was not a little surprised when ,i      
received this money from her1 for ,i had
 always known her as a poor girl1 and ,i
 had never heard any thing about her    
having come into the possession of this 
money1 and her dress had never given me 
the least indication of an alteration in
 her circumstances4 ,before1 however1   
accepting this money from her1 ,i had a 
long conversation with her1 in which ,i 
sought to probe her as to her motives1  

and in which ,i sought to ascertain     
whether1 as ,i had feared1 she might    
have given this money in the feeling of 
the moment1 without having counted the  
cost4 ,i was the more particular1       
because1 if the money were given1       
without its being given from ,scriptural
 motives1 and there should be regret    
afterwards1 the name of the ,lord would 
be dishonoured4 ,but ,i had not         
conversed long with this beloved sister1
 before ,i found that she was1 in this  
particular1 a quiet1 calm1 considerate  
follower of the ,lord ,jesus1 and one   
who desired1 in spite of what human     
reason might say1 to act according to   
the words of our ,lord3 ,lay not up for 
yourselves treasures upon earth4        
,matthew vi4 #ai4 ,sell that ye have1   
and give alms4 ,luke xii4 #cc4 ,when ,i 
remonstrated with her1 in order that ,i 
might see1 whether she had counted the  
cost1 she said to me3 ,the ,lord ,jesus 
has given ,his last drop of blood for   
me1 and should ,i not give ,him this    

#ajjl48 ,she likewise said3 ,rather than
 the ,orphan-,house should not be       
established1 ,i will give all the money 
,i have4 ,when ,i saw that she had      
weighed the matter according to the word
 of ,god1 and that she had counted the  
cost1 ,i could not but take the money1  
and admire the way which the ,lord took1
 to use this poor1 sickly sister as an  
instrument1 in so considerable a        
measure1 for helping1 at its very       
commencement1 this work1 which ,i had   
set about solely in dependence upon the 
living ,god4 ,at that time she would    
also have me take #el4 for the poor     
saints in communion with us4 ,i mention 
here particularly1 that this dear sister
 kept all these things to herself2 and  
did them as much as possible in secret2 
and during her life-time1 ,i suppose1   
not six brethren and sisters among us   
knew that she had ever possessed #dhjl41
 or that she had given #ajjl4 towards   
the ,orphan-,house4 ,but this is not    
all4 ,some time after this #ajjl4 had   

been given by her1 brother ,c-r1 7who   
was then labouring as a ,city           
,missionary in connexion with the       
,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution1 and
 who about that very time happened to   
visit from house to house in that part  
of the city where ,a4 ,l4 lived71 told  
me that he had met with many cases1 in  
which ,a4 ,l4 had given to one poor     
woman a bedstead1 to another some       
bedding1 to another some clothes1 to    
another food2 and thus instance upon    
instance of acts of love1 on the part of
 our dear sister ,a4 ,l41 had come      
before him4 ,i relate one instance more4
 ,august #d1 #ahcf1 seven months and a  
half after she had given the #ajjl41 she
 came one morning to me and said3 ,last 
evening ,i felt myself particularly     
stirred up to pray about the funds of   
the ,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution2
 but whilst praying ,i thought1 what    
good is it for me to pray for means1 if 
,i do not give1 when ,i have the means1 
and ,i have therefore brought you this  

#el4 ,as ,i had reason to believe that  
by this time by far the greater part of 
her money was gone1 ,i again had a good 
deal of conversation with her1 to see   
whether she really did count the cost1  
and whether this donation also was given
 unto the ,lord1 or from momentary      
excitement1 in which case it was better 
not to give the money4 ,however1 she was
 at this time also steadfast1 grounded  
upon the word of ,god1 and evidently    
constrained by the love of ,christ2 and 
all the effect my conversation had upon 
her was1 that she said3 ,you must take  
five shillings in addition to the #el41 
as a proof that ,i give the #el4        
cheerfully4 ,and thus she constrained me
 to take the #el4 #es4 ,four things are 
especially to be noticed about this     
beloved sister1 with reference to all   
this period of her earthly pilgrimage3  
#a1 ,she did all these things in secret1
 avoiding to the utmost all show about  
them1 and thus proved1 that she did not 
desire the praise of man4 #b1 ,she      

remained1 as before1 of an humble and   
lowly mind1 and she proved thus1 that   
she had done what she did unto the      
,lord1 and not unto man4 #c1 ,her dress 
remained1 during all the time that she  
had this comparative abundance1 the same
 as before4 ,it was clean1 yet as simple
 and inexpensive as it was at the time  
when all her income had consisted of    
#cs4 #f;d41 or at most #es41 per week4  
,there was not the least difference as  
to her lodging1 dress1 manner of life1  
etc4 ,she remained in every way the poor
 hand-maid of the ,lord1 as to all      
outward appearance4 #d1 ,but that which 
is as lovely as the rest1 she continued 
working at her needle all this time4    
,she earned her #bs4 #f;d41 or #cs41 or 
a little more1 a week1 by her work1 as  
before3 whilst she gave away the money  
in ,sovereigns or ,five ,pound          
,notes4--,at last all her money was     
gone1 and that some years before she    
fell sleep1 and as her bodily health    
never had been good1 as long as ,i had  

known her1 and was now much worse1 she  
found herself peculiarly dependent upon 
the ,lord1 who never forsook her up to  
the last moment of her earthly course4  
,the very commencement of her life of   
simple dependence upon the ,lord1 was   
such as greatly to encourage her4 ,she  
related the facts to me as ,i give them 
here4 ,when she was completely without  
money1 and when her little stock of tea 
and butter was also gone1 two sisters in
 the ,lord called on her4 ,after they   
had been a little while with her1 they  
told her that they had come to take tea 
with her4 ,she said to herself2 ,i      
should not at all mind to go without my 
tea1 but this is a great trial1 that ,i 
have nothing to set before these        
sisters2 and she gave them therefore to 
understand1 that their staying to tea   
would not be convenient at that time4   
,the sisters1 however1 ,i suppose1 not  
understanding the hint1 remained1 and   
presently brought out of a basket tea1  
sugar1 butter and bread1 and thus there 

was all that was requisite for the tea1 
and the remainder of the provisions was 
left with her4 ,she told me1 that at    
that time she was not accustomed to     
trials of faith1 as she afterwards was4 
,her body became weaker and weaker1 in  
consequence of which she was able to    
work very little1 for many months before
 she died2 but the ,lord supplied her   
with all she needed1 though she never   
asked for anything4 ,for instance1 a    
sister in communion with us sent her for
 many months all the bread she          
used4--,her mouth was full of           
thanksgiving1 even in the midst of the  
greatest bodily sufferings4 ,she fell   
asleep in ,jesus in ,january #ahdd4--;,i
 have related these facts1 because they 
tend to the praise of the ,lord1 and may
 be instrumental in stirring up other   
children of ,god1 to follow this dear   
departed sister in so far as she        
followed the ,lord ,jesus2 but1in       
particular1 that ,i may show in what    
remarkable ways the ,lord proved1 from  

the very beginning1 that the            
,orphan-,house was ,his and not mine4 ,i
 now go on to narrate further how the   
,lord provided me with means for it4    
,this evening a sister sent five small  
forms4 ,december #bj4 ,a sister gave me 
#el4 ,december #ba4 ,a friend sent #al4 
,weekly subscription of #ds4 ,december  
#bb4 ,a sister gave me #al4 and a friend
 sent #bs4 #f;d4 ,december #bc4 ,a      
brother gave this evening a piece of    
blind line and a dozen of blind tassels4
 ,about ten in the evening1 a gentleman 
brought me from an individual1 whose    
name he was not to mention1 #dl41 of    
which ,i was allowed to take #bl4 for   
the ,orphan-,house1 and to give the     
other #bl4 to poor believers4 ,december 
#bh4 ,during the last four days ,i had  
received no offerings1 and was rather   
cast down about it1 not knowing why the 
,lord dealt thus4 ,yet1 in the midst of 
it1 ,i had a hope1 that ,he was in the  
mean time working for the               
,orphan-,house1 though nothing had been 

given4 ,i was again stirred up to pray1 
that the ,lord would appear today4 ,a   
little after1 ,i saw a brother who told 
me1 that ever since he had received the 
printed proposal for the establishment  
of an ,orphan-,house1 he had considered 
the matter1 and that he was willing to  
give for the use of it certain premises1
 which he built some years since1 and   
which cost him #b1fjjl41 provided there 
could be raised about #ejjl41 to add to 
the buildings what may be needed1 to fit
 them for the purpose4 ,there is a piece
 of ground belonging to the premises1   
sufficiently large to build thereon what
 may be required4 ,the buildings are    
very suitable for an ,orphan-,house1    
containing some very large rooms4 ,if1  
therefore1 the ,lord should put it into 
the hearts of ,his people1 who have the 
means1 to give this sum of money1 the   
premises will be given4 ,the reason why 
they are offered under the              
above-mentioned condition is1 that in   
the state in which they are now1 on     

account of the peculiar purpose for     
which they were built1 they could       
accommodate only about #ae children1    
but1 by the proposed addition1 would be 
large enough for #ej or #fj4 ,for the   
present1 however1 the premises are let1 
and a notice of six months must be      
given4 ,if this matter should be brought
 about by the ,lord1 my prayer          
concerning a house1 which has been      
repeatedly brought before ,him since    
,december #eth1 will have been answered4
 ,yet ,i leave the matter in the hands  
of ,him1 who has the power to give us a 
place1 of which we may take immediate   
possession1 or who can put it into the  
hearts of ,his children to pay the rent 
for a house1 or to give us the #ejjl4   
necessary to complete the               
building4--,weekly subscription of #ds4 
,december #bi4 ,a clergyman gave #ajs4  
,december #cj4 ,a brother at ,sidmouth  
sent #el4  ,january #a1 #ahcf4 ,through 
a sister was given #fs41 being six      
different donations2 also from herself  

#al4 as a donation1 besides #as4 as a   
monthly subscription4 ,also a lady sent 
through her #al4 #as4 as a yearly       
subscription4 ,jan4 #b4 #d sister sent  
#el4 ,jan4 #c4 ,a gentleman sent #es1   
,jan4 #d4 ,weekly subscription of #ds4  
,through a brother from two friends1    
#as4 ,the same brother brought also one 
dish1 three plates1 two basins1 two cups
 and saucers1 and two knives and forks4 
,jan4 #e4 #ajs41 and #abs4 #i;d41 and   
#bl4 were given4 ,this evening some one 
rang our house bell4 ,when the door was 
opened1 no one was there1 but a kitchen 
fender and a dish were found at the     
door1 which1 no doubt1 were given for   
the ,orphan-,house4  ,jan4 #g4 #ajs4 was
 sent4 ,jan4 #h4 #bl4 was given1 also   
#ajs4 ,a sister offered herself for the 
work4 ,jan4 #i4 ,from ,e4 ,g4 #al4 #es41
 and from a brother #f;d4 ,jan4 #aj4    
#bs4 #f;d4 was given4 ,in the paper was 
written1 ,two widows mites for the      
,orphan-school4 ,in the name of the     
,lord establish it4 ,jan4 #aa4 ,weekly  

subscription #ds4 ,jan4 #ab4 #f;d41     
#f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 and #a;d4 were     
given4 ,jan4 #ad4 ,an old great coat was
 given2 #al4 by a brother4 ,a sister in 
,dublin offered #bl4 #abs4 yearly4      
,there was sent a deal box1 a small     
looking-glass1 a candlestick1 a jug1 a  
basin1 two plates1 two knives and forks1
 and a tin dish4  ,all this money1 and  
all these articles have been given1 and 
all these above-mentioned offers have   
been made1 without my asking any        
individual for anything2 moreover1      
almost all has been sent from           
individuals concerning whom ,i had      
naturally no reason to expect any thing1
 and some of whom ,i never saw4 ,upon   
the ground of these facts1 therefore1 ,i
 am clearly persuaded1 that it is the   
will of the ,lord that ,i should proceed
 in the work1 and ,i shall therefore now
 state something more definite than ,i  
could in the former paper4  #a4 ,if the 
,lord should not provide previous to the
 middle of ,february a house in the way 

of gift1 which in a few weeks may be    
occupied for an ,orphan-,house1 or put  
it into the heart of some one who loves 
,him to pay the rent for one1 or to lend
 us one for this purpose1 ,i intend1    
,god willing1 to rent certain suitable  
premises1 which are to be had for about 
#ejl4 yearly4 ,i purpose to take them   
for a twelvemonth1 for that time would  
be required1 before the building could  
be finished1 should the ,lord provide   
the above-mentioned #ejjl4  #b4 ,it is  
intended1 ,god willing1 to open the     
institution about ,april #a4  #c4 ,it is
 purposed to confine the ,orphan-house1 
for the present1 to female children4 ,my
 desire is to help both male and female 
orphans1 and that from their earliest   
youth2 but hitherto the ,lord has       
pointed out only a small commencement4  
,should it1 however1 please ,him to give
 me the means1 and to increase my faith 
and light1 ,i shall gladly serve ,him   
more extensively in this way4 ,it has   
appeared well to me to commence with    

female children1 because they are the   
more helpless sex1 and they need more   
particularly to be taken care of1 that  
they may not fall a prey to vice4 ,the  
house which is to had will accommodate  
about #cj children1 which number ,i     
intend to receive at once1 should the   
,lord give me the means to clothe that  
number1 and to furnish the house for so 
many2 but1 if not1 ,i purpose1 at all   
events1 the ,lord willing1 to commence  
the work1 though with a smaller number4 
#d4 ,it is intended to receive the      
children from the seventh to the twelfth
 year1 and to let them stay in the      
house1 till they are able to go to      
service4  #e4 ,as the children will be  
brought up for service1 they will be    
employed in useful household work4      
,,george ,m,ue,l,l,e,r4  ,bristol1 ,jan4
 #af1 #ahcf4  ,jan4 #bd4 ,today brother 
,craik preached once for the first time4
 ,jan4 #cj4 ,today ,i went to meet two  
sisters1 who were expected from ,london4
 ,i sat down in the coach office1 took  

out my ,bible1 and began to read2 and   
though in the midst of the noise of the 
city1 the ,lord most especially         
refreshed my soul1 so much so1 that ,i  
remember scarcely ever to have had more 
real communion with ,him1 which lasted  
for more than an hour4 ,it was the love 
of ,christ which led me there4 ,i would 
gladly have remained at home1 to have   
had time for prayer and reading the     
,word1 especially as ,i had to leave the
 house early in the morning4 ,yet ,i    
went for the ,lord's sake1 and ,he gave 
me a blessing3 so that1 though ,i had to
 wait more than two hours1 and after all
 the sisters did not arrive1 ,i was     
richly repaid4 ,may ,i but leave myself 
more and more in ,his hands6 ,he orders 
all things well6  ,february #c4 ,i have 
been very weak for some days4 ,this     
evening brother ,craik was able to      
preach instead of me1 for the first time
 at the week meetings4 ,how good is the 
,lord in restoring him thus far6 ,feb4  
#af4 ,today was a day of thanksgiving on

 account of brother ,craik's            
restoration4 ,we had three public       
meetings4 ,feb4 #ag4 ,i had been        
repeatedly praying today far a text1 but
 obtained none4 ,about five minutes     
before the time of preaching1 ,i was    
directed to ,rev4 ii4 #ai1 on which ,i  
preached with much assistance and       
enjoyment to my own soul1 without any   
previous preparation2 and the word was  
felt by many to be a word in season4    
,feb4 #bf4 ,this evening both churches  
met at tea together1 with the brethren  
and sisters who intend to leave us in a 
few days for missionary work4 ,feb4 #bi4
 ,this evening we had a meeting on      
behalf of the missionary brethren and   
sisters4 ,they were by seven brethren   
commended to the ,lord in prayer4       
,march #a4 ,this afternoon brother and  
sister ,groves1 and the brethren and    
sisters going with them for missionary  
purposes1 twelve in number1 left us for 
the ,east ,indies4 ,in consequence of   
the journey to the ,continent1 at the   

commencement of last year1 four brethren
 and two sisters have gone out1 two     
brethren in ,october last1 and two      
brethren and two sisters today4 ,this   
evening we had again a prayer meeting   
for the dear missionary party4 ,may the 
,lord soon give us the privilege of     
seeing some one of our own number go    
forth4 ,april #ba4 ,this day was set    
apart for prayer and thanksgiving       
concerning the ,orphan-,house1 as it is 
now opened4 ,in the morning several     
brethren prayed1 and brother ,craik     
spoke on the last verses of ,psalm xx4  
,in the afternoon ,i addressed our ,day 
and ,sunday-,school children1 the       
orphans and other children present4 ,in 
the evening we had another              
prayer-meeting4 ,there are now #ag      
children in the ,orphan-,house4  ,may   
#c4 ,i have now been for many days      
praying for the supply of our own       
temporal wants1 and for the funds of the
 ,scriptural ,knowledge ,institution2   
but1 as yet1 ,i have had not only no    

answers to my prayer1 but our income has
 been less than usual1 and we have had  
also but very little coming in for the  
funds of the ,institution4 ,we have not 
been able to put by our taxes1 and      
expect them daily to be called for4 ,my 
clothes also are now worse than any ,i  
ever wore1 and ,i have also but one     
suit4 ,may #f4 ,i have now been for some
 years1 and especially these last few   
months1 more or less thinking and       
praying respecting publishing a short   
account of the ,lord's dealings with me4
 ,today ,i have at last settled to do   
so1 and have begun to write4  ,may #af4 
,for these several weeks our income has 
been little2 and though ,i had prayed   
many times that the ,lord would enable  
us to put by the taxes1 yet the prayer  
remained unanswered4 ,in the midst of it
 all1 my comfort was that the ,lord     
would send help by the time it would be 
needed4 ,one thing particularly has been
 a trial to us of late1 far more than   
our own temporal circumstances1 which   

is1 that we have scarcely in any measure
 been able to relieve the distress among
 the poor saints4 ,today1 the ,lord at  
last1 after ,i had many times prayed to 
,him for these weeks past1 answered my  
prayers1 there being #gl4 #abs4 #j      
#a_/d;d4 given to me as my part of the  
free-will offerings through the boxes1  
two #el4 notes having been put in       
yesterday1 one for brother ,craik and   
one for me4 ,thus the ,lord has again   
delivered us1 and answered our prayers1 
and that not one single hour too late2  
for the taxes have not as yet been      
called for4 ,may ,he fill my heart with 
gratitude for this fresh deliverance1   
and may ,he be pleased to enable me more
 and more to trust in ,him1 and to wait 
patiently for ,his help6 ,may ,he also  
be pleased to teach me more and more the
 meaning of that word1 with reference to
 my own circumstances3--,mine hour is   
not yet came4  ,a third statement1      
containing the announcement of the      
opening of the ,orphan-,house for       

destitute female children1 and a        
proposal for the establishment of an    
,infant ,orphan-,house1 was on ,may     
#ahth1 #ahcf1 sent to the press1 and is 
here reprinted4  ,opening of the        
,orphan-,house for ,destitute ,female   
,children1 established in ,bristol1 in  
connexion with the ,scriptural          
,knowledge ,institution for ,home and   
,abroad2 and ,proposal for the          
,establishment of an                    
,infant-,orphan-,house4  ,in a previous 
printed account1 a statement has been   
given of the success with which the     
,lord has been pleased to crown the     
prayers of ,his servant1 respecting the 
establishment of an ,orphan-,house in   
this city4 ,the subject of my prayer    
was1 that ,he would graciously provide a
 house1 either as a loan1 or as a gift1 
or that some one might be led to pay the
 rent for one2 further1 that ,he would  
give me #ajjjl4 for the object1 and     
likewise suitable individuals to take   
care of the children4 ,a day or two     

after1 ,i was led to ask1 in addition to
 the above1 that he would put it into   
the hearts of ,his people to send me    
articles of furniture1 and some clothes 
for the children4 ,in answer to these   
petitions1 #ahdl4 #bs4 #f;d4 and many   
articles of furniture and clothing were 
sent1 a conditional offer of a house1 as
 a gift1 was made1 and individuals      
proposed themselves to take care of the 
children1 the particulars of which have 
been given in the statement already     
referred to1 dated ,jan4 #af1 #ahcf4 ,i 
shall now proceed to show how1 since    
that time1 the ,lord has continued to   
answer my prayers4  ,january #af1 #ahcf1
 there was given #f;d41 six yards of    
calico1 three plates1 a cup and saucer1 
and a jug4 ,january #ah1 #ds4 ,jan4 #ai1
 a saucepan and steamer1 a tin dish1 a  
teapot1 some drugget2 also #d;d41 and   
#as4 ,jan4 #ba4 #al41 also #es4 ,jan4   
#bb4 #bs4 #f;d4 ,jan4 #bc4 ,a brother   
gave #es41 the first fruits of the      
increase of his salary4 ,jan4 #bd4 #es42

 also #al41 and #al4 ,jan4 #be4 ,a      
brother promised to give #ejl4 within a 
twelvemonth1 with the particular object 
of thus securing the payment of the rent
 of a house4 ,thus the ,lord has        
answered the prayer respecting this     
point4 ,there were also given #al41     
#f;d4 and #ds4 ,jan4 #bg4 ,a form was   
sent4 ,jan4 #bh4 ,a deal table was      
given1 also1 anonymously1 were sent a   
coal box and #ds41 also a bedstead4     
,jan4 #bi4 ,two little waiters1 two     
candlesticks1 two chandeliers1 two night
 shades1 a tin kettle1 a warmer1 a bread
 basket1 a fire guard2 also one dozen   
tin cups1 six plates1 and #as4 #f;d42   
also #as41 a water jug1 six plates1 a   
sugar basin1 a teapot1 a tea canister1  
and a knife4 ,jan4 #cj4 ,a frying pan1 a
 tea canister1 a metal teapot1 a tin    
dish1 a pepper box1 a flour scoop1 a    
skimmer1 a grater1 two tin saucepans1 a 
tin warmer1 #ee thimbles1 five parcels  
of hooks and eyes2 also #al4 ,jan4 #ca4 
#el4 #es42 an old white dress and a fur 

tippet4  ,february #a4 #ds41 #bs4 #f;d41
 also a sister in the ,lord offered     
today to make the bonnets for the       
children gratuitously1 if any one would 
buy the straw1 and that her husband     
would make a bedstead1 if any one would 
buy the wood2 she also mentioned that   
they would gladly give both the straw   
and the wood1 if they had the means4    
,feb4 #b4 #f;d41 #b;d and out of the box
 in my room was taken #cs4 ,feb4 #d4    
#bs4 #f;d41#f;d42 also a desk and a     
kitchen table2 there was also promised a
 subscription of #hs4 annually4 ,feb4   
#e4 #as4 #f;d4 ,feb4 #f4 ,a brother sent
 #ajjl41 being induced to do so an      
having had the former paper read to him4
 ,feb4 #g4 #al4 #bs41 #as41 #f;d41 #bs4 
#f;d41 #es41 #bs4 #f;d41 #es41 #bs4     
#f;d41 #cl4 #ajs4 ,feb4 #h4 ,a table and
 two chairs1 #ds41 #el41 also #cjl4 was 
sent from ,ireland2 #ajs41 #ajs41 #al4  
,feb4 #i4 #al41 #ds4 #a;d41 #ajs41 #as4 
#a;d41 #as4 #a;d41 #as41 #as41 #as41    
#as41 #a;d41 #es41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4     

#f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4     
#f;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41      
#d;d41 #a;d41 #as4 ,feb4 #aa4 ,three    
yards of print1 #bs4 #f;d41 #es42 #es41 
#ajs4 ,feb4 #ab4 ,a clothes' horse1 a   
coffee pot1 and #as42 also a washing    
tub1 a coffee mill1 a pepper mill1 two  
dozen pieced of bobbin1 three dozen stay
 laces1 two dozen thimbles1 two dozen   
bodkins1 #cjj needles1 a gridiron1 six  
pots of blacking paste1 a pound of      
thread1 and a large deal table4 ,feb4   
#ad4 #ajs41 #al41 put anonymously into  
,bethesda boxes1 for the ,orphan-,house4
 ,feb4 #ae4 ,two glass salt cellars1 a  
mustard pot1 a vinegar cruet1 and a     
pepper box1 also #ds41 #d;d41 #d;d41    
#d;d41 #d;d41 #bs4 #f;d4 ,feb4 #af4     
#d;d4 #as41 #d;d41 ,feb4 #ag4 #es4 ,feb4
 #ah4 ,a bedstead1 and by two poor      
persons1 #b;d4 ,feb4 #ai4 ,there were   
sent from ,london #cd yards of print1   
six yards of calico1 one dozen pocket   
handkerchiefs1 four pairs of stockings1 
and two ,new ,testaments4 ,feb4 #bj4    

,two salt cellars1 two mugs1 two plates1
 also two pocket handkerchiefs4 ,feb4   
#ba4 #al4 ,feb4 #bb4 #ds41 #as4 ,feb4   
#bc4 ,twelve yards of gingham from two  
,swiss sisters4 ,feb4 #be4 #bs4 #f;d41  
#bs4 #f;d4 ,feb4 #bh4 #al4 ,feb4 #bi4   
#al41 #es41 #ds4  ,march #b4 #al41 #as41
 #as4 #f;d41 #as41 #as41 #as41 #a_/b;d41
 #bs41 #as41 #as41 #bs4 #f;d42 also out 
of the box in my room1 #al4 #bs4 #f;d42 
two large iron pots were sent           
anonymously4 ,march #d4 #ajl41 #ajs41   
#cs41 #g;d41 #ajs41 #bs4 #f;d41 #ajs41  
#ajs41 #cs42 all these offerings were   
sent from ,clapham2 also a desk4 ,march 
#e4 ,some fancy worsted and #as41 the   
produce of the sale of some old map     
rollers4 ,march #g4 #ds41 #ajs41 #es41  
#es41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs41 #bs4
 #f;d41 #es42 all these offerings were  
sent from ,cleve1 also #es42 also1 from 
a distance of about #ajj miles1 was sent
 the valuable and useful present of five
 pewter dishes1 three dozen pewter      
plates1 three dozen metal spoons1 two   

coral necklaces1 a pair of coral        
earrings1 and a large gold brooch--the  
trinkets to be sold for the benefit of  
the ,orphan-,house4 ,also from the same 
place was sent #ajs4 which had been laid
 up for a time of need1 but which were  
sent because the donor thought that the 
time of trust in the ,lord in ,bristol  
was her time of need to give4  ,march   
#aj4 #hs41 #as4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41      
#f;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #a;d41 #d;d41      
#d;d41 #d;d41 #es41 #bs4 ,march #aa4    
#al41 #es4 ,march #ac4 ,a little girl   
sent1 from a distance of more than #bjj 
miles1 #bs4 #f;d4 ,march #ad4 ,a brother
 at ,plymouth promised to send #bjl41   
also #ds4 were given4 ,march #ae4 #g;d41
 #ajs41 #f;d41 #as41 #as41 #a;d41 #f;d4 
,march #af4 #as42 anonymously was sent  
from ,london #al41 also #bs4 #f;d4      
,march #ah4 #aj s4 ,march #ai4 #cs41    
#as41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d4 ,march 
#ba4 #ds4 ,march #bb4 #al4 ,march #bc4  
,a large deal box1 also anonymously six 
dishes4 ,march #bd4 #es4 ,march #be4 ,a 

ton of coals4 ,march #bg4 #al41 #al41   
#al41 #ajs42 these offerings were sent  
from ,trowbridge1 also #ajs4 ,from the  
,isle of ,wight1 #bl41 #bl41 #al41      
#ajs41 a large piece of green baize1 and
 two metal spoons4 ,march #bh4 #al41    
#ds41 #c;d41 #ca41 #aj s41 #fs41 #aj s41
 #bs4 #f;d41 #es41 #es41 also an iron   
kettle and some drugget4 ,march #bi4    
#as4 #c;d41 #as4 #c;d41 #as41 #as4 #f;d4
 ,march #ca4 #bs4  ,april #b4 #as41 #bs4
 #f;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 also six blankets1
 two counterpanes1 four sheets1 eight   
bonnets1 five frocks1 six pinafores1    
with the promise to send also six       
chemises 7sent since74 ,april #d4 #ds41 
#as41 #as41 #h;d41 #as41 #a;d41 #as41   
#c;d41 #fs41 #bs4 #f;d41 #al41 #al41    
#cs41 also #ad tippets1 three pinafores1
 one frock1 three chemises 7two more    
promised71 six flannel petticoats2 also 
six stuff petticoats2 also six flannel  
petticoats 7and six chemises promised71 
also a sheet4 ,april #e4 #bl41 #gs41    
#f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #a;d41      

#d;d41 #f;d4 ,april #f4 ,one dozen of   
washing basins and one jug4 ,april #g4  
#bs4 #b;d41 #cs41 #as41 #bs4 #b;d41 #as4
 #a;d4 ,april #h4 #ajs41 #ajs41 #f;d41  
#as41 #bs41 also a bench4 ,april #i4    
#d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #bs41 also  
three knives and forks1 also some       
marking ink4 ,april #aj4 ,two patent    
locks4 ,april #aa4 #ds4 ,april #ab4     
#as41 #h;d41 #bs41 a jug1 also twelve   
bonnets and six tippets4 ,april #ac4 ,a 
set of fire irons1 a tea kettle1 a coal 
box1 a tin saucepan1 a tripod1 a tea    
pot1 three cups and saucers1 a wash-hand
 basin1 three small basins1 and two     
plates4 ,april #ae4 #ajs41 #ajs4 ,april 
#af4 #el41 also #al4 and #bb ,hymn      
,books4 ,also anonymously were sent two 
dozen pocket handkerchiefs1 also a hymn1
 ,the ,orphan's ,hope1 in a frame4      
,april #ag4 ,a cask1 also a hundred     
weight of treacle1 and #cf pounds of    
moist sugar4  ,april #ah1 #ds4 ,april   
#ai4 #bs4 #f;d41 #as4 ,april #bj4 ,a new
 bedstead4 ,from ,clapham were sent     

#bal4 and #aal41 likewise three flannel 
petticoats1 some print1 six frocks1 four
 pinafores1 seven tippets1 #ab caps1 #ad
 chemises1 #bd furnished work bags1 #ab 
pocket handkerchiefs1 #af pairs of      
stockings1 one pair of sleeves2 besides 
this1 with an orphan child1 was sent    
from ,clapham1 a complete new outfit4   
,april #ba4 #bl41 #bs41 #as41 #f;d41    
#f;d41 #f;d41 #es41 #bs41 also two      
candlesticks1 a pepper box1 and a       
handkerchief4 ,april #bb4 #as41 #ajs41  
#bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #b #c_/d;d41 also a    
long handled brush and #f;d41 also an   
ironing blanket1 and #cb yards of       
flannel4 ,april #bc4 #bl41 #es41 #ajs41 
a cheese1 and #ah pounds of beef4 ,april
 #be4 #as4 and eight plates4 ,april #bf4
 #f;d41 #f;d41 #es4 ,april #bg4 #aj;d4  
,april #bh4 #as41 also two tons of coal1
 also two patch-work quilts1 #ae work   
bags and pin-cushions1 #ab needle cases1
 three little bags1 one tippet1 two     
pairs of stockings1 one kettle holder1  
also six pairs of worsted stockings4    

,may #b4 #hs41 #al41 #aj s4 ,may #c4    
#h;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 and a pair of shoes4 
,may #d4 ,a gentleman and lady1 who saw 
the ,institution1 left six chemises1    
seven pocket handkerchiefs1 two flannel 
petticoats1 four pairs of stockings1 and
 four pairs of gloves2 there were also  
sent #ah thimbles1 a gross of buttons1 a
 gross of hooks and eyes4 ,may #e4 #bs4 
#f;d41 #as4 ,may #f4 #ae pairs of       
worsted stockings4 ,may #g4 #es41 #bs4  
#f;d4 ,may #h4 #es41 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d4  
,may #i4 #ds41 #ajs41 #f;d41 #d;d41     
#d;d41 #d;d4 ,may #aj4 #f;d41 #d;d41    
#f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41 #a;d41 #d;d41 #bs4 
,may #aa4 #al41 #bs4 #f;d41 #as4 ,may   
#ac4 ,a bonnet1 also a dish1 sent by a  
poor person in an almshouse2 a          
well-wisher sent1 for little orphan     
boys1 six frock pinafores1 six little   
shirts1 six frocks and trousers4 ,may   
#ad4 #i pounds of soap4 ,may #ae4 ,s4   
,s4 #bs4 #f;d4 ,may #af4 #ds4 ,may #ag4 
,out of the box in the ,orphan-,house1  
#cs4 #j #a_/b;d41 also #as4  #a4 ,it may

 be well to state1 that the above       
results have followed in answer to      
prayer1 without any one having been     
asked by me for one single thing1 from  
which ,i have refrained1 not on account 
of want of confidence in the brethren1  
or because ,i doubted their love to the 
,lord1 but that ,i might see the hand of
 ,god so much the more clearly4 ,for as 
the work has been begun without any     
visible support1 in dependence only upon
 the living ,god1 it was of the utmost  
importance to be sure of ,his           
approbation at the very commencement4   
#b4 ,from this statement1 and from that 
contained in the last printed account1  
it will be seen how the ,lord1 in a     
great measure1 has already answered the 
petition of ,december #e1 #ahce2 for a  
house has been given1 suitable          
individuals have offered themselves to  
take care of the children1 and much more
 furniture1 and many more articles of   
clothing have been sent than ,i ever had
 expected4 ,the only part of the prayer1

 which has not been as yet quite        
fulfilled1 is1 that which respects the  
#ajjjl41 which1 however1 the ,lord1 ,i  
doubt not1 will likewise send in ,his   
own time4 ,in the meantime1 let my      
brethren help me to praise ,him1 that   
,he has sent already more than one half 
of that sum1 and therefore more than for
 the present has been needed4  #c4 ,so  
far as ,i remember1 ,i brought even the 
most minute circumstances concerning the
 ,orphan-,house before the ,lord in my  
petitions1 being conscious of my own    
weakness and ignorance4 ,there was1     
however1 one point ,i never had prayed  
about1 namely1 that the ,lord would send
 children2 for ,i naturally took it for 
granted that there would be plenty of   
applications4 ,the nearer1 however1 the 
day came1 which had been appointed for  
receiving applications1 the more ,i had 
a secret consciousness1 that the ,lord  
might disappoint my natural             
expectations1 and show me that ,i could 
not prosper in one single thing without 

,him4 ,the appointed time came1 and not 
even one application was made4 ,i had   
before this been repeatedly tried1      
whether ,i might not1 after all1 against
 the ,lord's mind1 have engaged in the  
work4 ,this circumstance now led me to  
lie low before my ,god in prayer the    
whole of the evening1 ,february #c1 and 
to examine my heart once more as to all 
the motives concerning it2 and being    
able1 as formerly1 to say1 that ,his    
glory was my chief aim1 i4e41 that it   
might be seen that it is not a vain     
thing to trust in the living ,god1--and 
that my second aim was the spiritual    
welfare of the orphan-children1--and the
 third their bodily welfare2 and still  
continuing in prayer1 ,i was at last    
brought to this state1 that ,i could say
 from my heart1 that ,i should rejoice  
in ,god being glorified in this matter1 
though it were by bringing the whole to 
nothing4 ,but as still1 after all1 it   
seemed to me more tending to the glory  
of ,god1 to establish and prosper the   

,orphan-,house1 ,i could then ask ,him  
heartily1 to send applications4 ,i      
enjoyed now a peaceful state of heart   
concerning the subject1 and was also    
more assured than ever that ,god would  
establish it4 ,the very next day1       
,february #d1 the first application was 
made1 and since then #db more have been 
made4  #d4 ,the house mentioned in the  
last printed account1 which we had      
intended to rent1 having been let before
 any applications had been made1 and    
nothing more having been done about the 
premises offered as a gift1 on account  
of the want of money needed to complete 
the building1 ,i rented1 at least for   
one year1 the house ,no4 #f1 ,wilson    
,street1 as being1 on account of its    
cheapness and largeness1 very suitable1 
and in which1 up to ,march #beth1 ,i had
 been living myself4 ,having furnished  
it for #cj children1 we began an ,april 
#aath1 #ahcf1 to take them in1 and on   
,april #bast the ,institution was opened
 by a day being set apart for prayer and

 thanksgiving4 ,there are now #bf       
children in the house1 and a few more   
are expected daily4 ,they are under the 
care of a matron and governess4  #e4 ,in
 the last printed account it was        
mentioned that we intended to take in   
the children from the seventh to the    
twelfth year4 ,but after six            
applications had been made for children 
between four and six years of age1 it   
became a subject of solemn and prayerful
 consideration1 whether1 as long as     
there were vacancies1 such children     
should not be received1 though so young4
 ,for it appeared to me1 that if it     
becomes the saints to care in this way1 
according to their ability1 for those   
whom ,god has bereaved of both parents1 
when they become seven years of age1    
that it becomes them equally so1 to take
 care of them whilst they are under     
seven years1 and therefore completely   
unable to help themselves4 ,further1    
orphan children are often left to       
themselves1 and thus1 at the age of #aa 

or #ab years1 have already made much    
progress in wickedness4 ,therefore ,i   
came at last to the conclusion to take  
in the little girls under seven years of
 age1 for whom application had been     
made4 ,further1 there are exceedingly   
few institutions in the kingdom1 in     
which infant orphans are received1 and  
provided with scriptural education4     
,further1 it has been repeatedly brought
 before me1 how desirable it would be to
 establish also in this city an         
orphan-house for male children1 and     
there were even the above-mentioned     
articles sent for little orphan boys4   
,partly1 then1 on account of these      
reasons2 and partly1 because the        
,institution already opened will be     
quite filled in a few days1 and         
applications continue to be made2 and   
partly1 because the ,lord has done      
hitherto far above what ,i could have   
expected3 ,i have at last1 after        
repeated prayer1 come to the conclusion1
 in the name of the ,lord1 and in       

dependence upon ,him alone for support1 
to propose the establishment of an      
,infant-,orphan-,house4 ,it is intended 
to open this ,institution1 as soon as   
suitable premises and individuals1 to   
take care of the children1 c41 have been
 obtained4  a4 ,it is intended to       
receive into this ,infant-,orphan-,house
 destitute male and female infants      
bereaved of both parents1 from their    
earliest days up to the seventh year1   
and to provide them with food1 clothing1
 needful attendance1 and ,scriptural    
education4  b4 ,it is intended to let   
the female children stay up to the      
seventh year in the                     
,infant-,orphan-,house1 and then to     
remove them to the ,institution already 
opened1 till they are able to go to     
service4  c4 ,it is also intended1 as   
far as the ,lord may help1 to provide   
for the boys1 when they are above seven 
years1 though we cannot at present say  
in what manner4  ,in proposing the      
establishment of this second            

,orphan-,house1 ,i do it in the same    
simple dependence upon ,god alone1 as in
 the case of the former4 ,and feeling my
 own weakness1 and knowing that it is   
not in my power to give faith to myself1
 ,i ask the brethren to help me with    
their prayers1 that my faith may not    
fail4  #f4 ,to avoid misunderstandings1 
,i would expressly state1 that both the 
last mentioned ,institution1 and the one
 already opened1 are for orphan children
 living in any part of the ,united4     
,kingdom4  ,,george ,m,ue,l,l,e,r4      
,bristol1 ,may #ah1 #ahcf4  ,june #c4   
,from ,may #af up to this day ,i have   
been confined to the house1 and a part  
of the time to my bed1 on account of a  
local inflammation1 which keeps me from 
walking4 ,almost every day during this  
time ,i have been able to continue      
writing a narrative of the ,lord's      
dealings with me1 which had been again  
laid aside after ,may #g1 on account of 
a number of pressing engagements4 ,it is
 very remarkable1 that the greatest     

objection against writing it for the    
press was want of time4 ,now1 through   
this affliction1 which leaves my mind   
free1 and gives me time1 on account of  
confinement to the house1 ,i have been  
able to write about #ajj quarto pages4  
,may the ,lord in mercy teach me about  
this matter6  ,june #h4 ,i am still     
getting better4 ,the abscess is now     
open4 ,this affliction has been1 by the 
mercy of the ,lord1 an exceedingly light
 one4 ,not one day have ,i had severe   
pain1 and not one day have ,i been kept 
altogether from working4 ,june #i4 ,i   
was able to go again today to the       
,orphan-,house1 and to read the         
,scriptures with the children4 ,this day
 came three more children1 who have made
 up our number1 so that there are now   
thirty in the house4  ,june #aa4 ,i am1 
by the mercy of ,god1 still getting     
better1 but1 as yet1 unable to walk     
about4 ,all this week ,i have been again
 enabled to go on writing for the press4
 ,june #ab4 ,today the ,lord very kindly

 allowed me to preach again1 and that   
most undeservedly1 and much sooner than 
,i could have expected4 ,june #ad4 ,this
 morning1 brother ,c-r and ,i prayed    
unitedly1 chiefly about the schools and 
the circulation of the ,scriptures4     
,besides asking for blessings upon the  
work1 we have also asked the ,lord for  
the means which are needed2 for on ,july
 #a1 #agl4 #ajs4 will be due for the    
rent of school-rooms1 and1 besides this1
 we want at least #djl4 more to go on   
with the circulation of the ,scriptures1
 to pay the salaries of the masters1 c4 
,towards all this we have only about    
#gl4 ,i also prayed for the remainder of
 the #ajjjl4 for the ,orphan-,house4    
,june #ah4 ,we have had1 for many weeks 
past1 generally little money for our    
personal expenses1 which has been a     
trial to us1 not on our own account1 but
 because we have thus been able to do   
but very little for the poor brethren4  
,today1 ,saturday1 we have #cs4 left1   
just enough to pay for a fly to take me 

to and bring me back from ,bethesda     
tomorrow1 as ,i am unable to walk4 ,this
 money we should not have had1 but for  
our baker1 a brother1 who refused today 
to take money for the usual quantity of 
bread1 which we daily take4  ,june #ba4 
,this evening brother ,c-r and ,i found1
 that the ,lord has not only been       
pleased to send us1 through the         
offerings which have come in during the 
last week1 in answer to our prayers1 the
 #agl4 #ajs4 which will be due for the  
rent of two school-rooms on ,july #ast1 
but that we have #el4 more than is      
needed4 ,thus the ,lord once more has   
answered our prayers4  ,june #be4       
,saturday4 ,we have been again helped   
through this week1 as it regards our    
personal need1 and have #cs4 left1      
though we had many shillings to pay for 
driving about4 ,now the ,lord has put it
 into the hearts of some of ,his        
children1 to provide me with a fly every
 ,lord's-day1 as long as ,i may need it4
  ,july #a4 ,today a suit of new clothes

 was given to me1 which came very       
seasonably4 ,may this fresh instance of 
the ,lord's loving-kindness lead me to  
love ,him more2 and may ,he also be     
pleased richly to reward those brethren1
 who have thus ministered to my need6   
,july #af4 ,today a brother sent me a   
new hat1 the seventh which in succession
 has been given to me4  ,july #bh4 ,for 
some weeks past we have not been able to
 pay the salary of the masters and      
governesses a month in advance1 but have
 been obliged to pay it weekly4 ,brother
 ,c-r and ,i have lately prayed         
repeatedly together respecting the      
funds1 but we were now brought so low1  
that we should not have been able to pay
 even this weekly salary of the         
teachers1 had not the ,lord most        
remarkably helped us again today4 ,for  
besides #al4 which was given to us1 this
 evening a brother gave #hl41 which sum 
had been made up by a number of his     
workmen paying weekly one penny each1 of
 their own accord1 towards our funds4   

,the money had been collecting for many 
months1 and1 in this our necessity1 it  
had been put into the heart of this     
brother to bring it4 ,my faith has been 
greatly strengthened through this       
circumstance4 ,for before today1 though 
,i have never been in the least allowed 
to doubt the ,lord's faithfulness1 ,i   
did not understand ,his purpose in ,his 
dealings with us of late1 in not sending
 us more than we have needed just to be 
kept from stopping2 and ,i have         
sometimes thought1 whether it might not 
be ,his will1 on account of my want of  
faithfulness in ,his work1 to decrease  
the field2 but now ,i see1 that         
notwithstanding my unworthiness1 ,his   
allowing us to pray so frequently1 was  
only that the deliverance might be felt 
so much the more when it came4  ,july   
#bi4 ,this evening from six to half-past
 nine we had again a meeting for        
inquirers4 ,there came twelve fresh     
cases before us1 and there were six more
 than we could see4 ,thus we saw1 that  

the work of the ,lord1 even as it       
regards conversion1 is still going on   
among us4  ,october #a4 ,today1 in      
dependence upon the ,lord alone for     
means1 we engaged a brother as a master 
for a sixth day school4 ,last ,saturday1
 for the first time1 we were so low in  
funds1 that we needed #al4 more than we 
had1 to pay the salaries a week in      
advance2 but one sister1 on account of  
the death of her father1 as we          
afterwards learned1 was kept from       
calling for her money1 and on the next  
day we received more than was needed to 
pay her4 ,on account1 therefore1 of the 
many deliverances which we have had of  
late1 we have not hesitated to enlarge  
the field1 as another boys' school was  
greatly needed1 there having been many  
applications for admission standing     
these several months past4  ,october #e4
 ,this evening #bel4 was given to me for
 the ,scriptural ,knowledge             
,institution4 ,thus the ,lord has       
already given the means of defraying the

 expenses of the new boys' school for   
some months to come4  ,october #ai4     
,today1 after having many times prayed  
respecting this matter1 ,i have at last 
engaged a sister as matron for the      
,infant-,orphan-,house1 never having    
been able1 up to this day1 to meet with 
an individual who seemed suitable3      
though there has been money enough in   
hand for some time past for commencing  
this work1 and there have been also     
applications made for several infant    
orphans4  ,october #be4 ,today we       
obtained without1 any trouble1 through  
the kind hand of ,god1 very suitable    
premises for the ,infant-,orphan-,house4
 ,if we had laid out many hundred pounds
 in building a house1 we could scarcely 
have built one more suitable for the    
purpose4 ,how evident is the hand of    
,god in all these matters6 ,how         
important to leave our concerns1 great  
and small1 with ,him2 for ,he arranges  
all things well6 ,if our work be ,his   
work1 we shall prosper in it4  ,november

 #cj4 ,on account1 as ,i suppose1 of    
many pressing engagements1 ,i had not   
been led for some time past to pray     
respecting the funds4 ,but being in     
great need1 ,i was led yesterday        
morning1 earnestly to ask the ,lord1 and
 in answer to this petition a brother   
gave me last evening #ajl4 ,he had had  
it in his heart for several months past1
 to give this sum1 but had been hitherto
 kept from it1 not having the means4    
,just now1 in this our great necessity1 
the ,lord furnished him with the means1 
and we were helped in this way4 ,in     
addition to this #ajl41 ,i received last
 evening a letter with #el41 from a     
sister whom ,i never saw1 and who has   
been several times used by ,god as an   
instrument to supply our wants4 ,she    
writes thus3 ,it has been so much on my 
mind lately to send you some money1 that
 ,i feel as if there must be some need1 
which the ,lord purposes to honour me by
 making me the instrument of supplying4 
,i therefore enclose you #el41 all ,i   

have in the house at this moment2 but if
 you have occasion for it1 and will let 
me know1 ,i will send you as much more4 
,besides these two donations1 ,i        
received today #cl4 #cs4  ,december #ae4
 ,this day was set apart for prayer and 
thanksgiving respecting the             
,infant-,orphan-,house1 which was opened
 on ,november #bh4 ,in the morning we   
had a prayer-meeting4 ,in the afternoon1
 besides prayer and thanksgiving1 ,i    
addressed the children of our           
day-schools and the orphans1 about #cej1
 on ,ecclesiastes xii4 #a4 ,in the      
evening ,i gave a further account of the
 ,orphan-,houses1 commencing from the   
time when the last printed account had  
been issued1 dated ,may #ah1 #ahcf4 ,the
 substance of this account was printed1 
and is reprinted here for the sake of   
those who are as yet unacquainted with  
it4  ,further account of the            
,orphan-,house for ,female ,orphans     
above ,seven ,years of ,age2 and        
,opening of the ,infant-,orphan-,house1 

for destitute ,male and ,female ,orphans
 under ,seven ,years of ,age4  ,it is   
now a twelve-month since the proposal   
for the establishment of an             
,orphan-,house was first made4 ,since   
then the ,lord has given me almost all  
,i requested of ,him1 and in some       
respects even more4 ,this was in part   
stated in the last two papers which were
 printed on this subject dated ,january 
#af1 and ,may #ah1 #ahcf4 ,of the       
#a1jjjl4 which ,i had asked of ,god on  
,december #e1 #ahce1 ,i had actually    
received on ,may #ah1 #ahcf1 #dejl4     
#acs4 #f #c_/d;d42 and besides this1    
#gjl4 had been promised by two brethren4
 ,as it regards premises1 articles of   
clothing1 furniture1 c41 ,i had received
 even beyond my petition4 ,i have now   
the pleasure of detailing1 still        
further1 how ,god has continued to      
answer my prayer since ,may #ah1 #ahcf4 
,may #aith was given #al4 #bcrd #al4 and
 #ds4 ,there were also sent two buckets 
and #as4 #bdth41 #aj s4 #f;d41 #b;d41   

#as4 #f;d4 #beth1 one pound of butter1  
#bs41 #as41 #as4 ,there was also sent   
#ads41 and in the paper was written3    
,the history of this money is3 ,a lady  
was going to purchase a dress4 ,the     
enclosed sum was the difference between 
the fashionable one1 which took her     
fancy1 and one less fashionable4 ,so she
 thought1 the orphans should profit by  
this sacrifice of her fancy4 ,may #bgth1
 there was left at my house a sovereign1
 and in the paper was written3 #a       
,thess4 v4 #be4 ,pause with me a few    
moments1 dear reader1 before going on   
with the account4 ,in preparing the     
third edition for the press1 ,i have    
been struck with the very many cases in 
which individuals1 who are spoken of in 
this narrative1 are no more in the land 
of the living4 ,so it is with the two   
donors of the last mentioned sums4 ,the 
dear sister who would not indulge her   
fancy in having a more fashionable      
dress1 but who would rather give the    
fourteen shillings1 which thus could be 

saved1 to the orphans1 has been with her
 ,lord for more than two years4 ,will   
she regret not having indulged her fancy
 in that instance8 ,will she now suffer 
loss on account of it8 ,surely          
not6--,the dear brother who gave the    
sovereign1 was a gracious devoted       
clergyman of the ,city of ,bristol4 ,he 
had written in the paper in which the   
sovereign was enclosed1 #a ,thess4 v4   
#be4 7,brethren1 pray for us47 ,this    
dear man of ,god does now no longer need
 our prayers4 ,he entered into his rest 
several years ago4 ,yet a little while1 
dear believing reader1 and1 if the      
coming of the ,lord prevent not1 we too 
shall fall asleep in ,jesus4 ,therefore1
 let us work1 while it is day3 the night
 cometh1 when no man can work4 ,and1    
,whatsoever thy hand findeth to do1 do  
it with thy might3 for there is no work1
 nor device1 nor knowledge1 nor wisdom  
in the grave1 whither thou goest4--,but 
how would it be with you1 dear reader1  
if you are unprepared1 and should be    

taken out of the world8 ,let me beseech 
you to seek the ,lord while ,he may be  
found4 ,jesus died to save sinners4 ,he 
shed ,his blood4 ,he fulfilled the law  
of ,god1 and died the ,,just for the    
,,unjust3 and whosoever depends for     
salvation upon ,his perfect obedience1  
and upon ,his sufferings and death1     
shall be saved2 for ,god has said it4   
,may #bhth1 ,a fender and two coal      
scuttles4 #bith1 #el4 #cjth1 #ds4 ,also 
#bs4 #f;d41 with two gowns and a tippet4
 ,the brother who left a sovereign with 
#a ,thess4 v4 #be1 gave today #ajs4     
more2 #bs4 #d;d4 ,june #ast1 from a few 
sisters in ,dublin1 nine pocket         
handkerchiefs1 #ai #a_/b yards of stuff1
 and forty-two yards of print4 #dth1    
#es4 #f;d41 eighteen little books4 #eth1
 #f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d4 #fth1 #ds4  
#gth1 #es4 #a;d41 #bl4 #bs4 #f;d4 #hth1 
#d;d41 #as41 #as41 #cs4 #ith1 six pairs 
of gentlemen's trousers1 two coats1 one 
waistcoat1 five pairs of socks1 two     
gowns--all worn4 #ajth1 #al41 also from 

a friend in ,ireland #al4 #abth1 ,s4 ,s4
 #bs4 #f;d4 #acth1 #ds41 #el4 #adth1    
#as4 #a;d41 #as41 #bs4 #f;d41 #f;d41    
#as41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #cs4      
#c;d41 #as4 #a;d41 #as4 #a;d4 #aeth1 a  
brother at ,plymouth sent #bel41 #bjl4  
of which had been previously promised4  
#ahth1 #al41 #a;d41 #f #a_/d pounds of  
bacon1 a form1 a chopping knife4 #aith1 
#al4 #as41 #ajs42 #abs4 by sale of      
ornaments4 #bjth1 #ds4 ,also from       
,teignmouth1 #es41 #es41 #bs4 #f;d41    
#bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41     
#cl41 #ajs41 #bs4 #f;d41 #as4 #a;d41    
#es41 together with a gown1 a boy's     
pinafore1 a pair of socks1 coloured     
cotton for three children's frocks1 two 
babies' bed gowns1 and five babies'     
night caps4 #bast1 #el4 #ajs41 #f;d41   
#d;d41 #b;d41 #d;d41 #b;d41 #f;d41      
#f;d41 twenty pounds of bacon and ten   
pounds of cheese4 #bb;d1 box in the     
,orphan-,house1 #bs4 #d;d4 #bdth1 #bs4  
#f;d41 #cs4 #h #a_/b;d4 #bgth1 #ds4     
#bhth1 #bs4 #f;d41 #ds41 #d;d41 #f;d41  

#ajs41 #fs4 #f;d4 #bith1 six straw      
bonnets4 #cjth1 #es41 #bl4 ,july #dth1  
#f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #ds4 ,there 
was also sent from two orphans #dhl41   
#as4 #a;d41 #ajs41 #hs4 #f;d41 #bs4     
#f;d41 #as4 #a;d41 #as4 #a;d41 #as4     
#a;d41 #as4 #d;d4 #eth1 #as41 #as4      
#b;d41 #c;d41 #ds41 #d;d41 #as4 #fth1   
six new cane chairs4 #gth1 #bl41 #abs41 
#ajs41 #bs4 #hth1 #as41 #bs4 #f;d41 #cs4
 #ajth1 #ajs41 #ajs41 #al41 #al4 #aath1 
#hs41 #acs4 #abth1 #acs4 #b;d4 #acth1   
#abs4 #adth1 there were sent six        
chemises1 which had been promised on    
,april #adth4 ,also fourteen pin        
cushions4 #aeth1 six night caps and #b  
petticoats4 #bjth1 #ajs41 #es41 #al41   
#f;d41 #b;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41      
#f;d41 #d;d41 #b;d41 #d;d4 #bdth1 #al4  
#beth1 #hs41 ,s4 ,s4 #es4 ,also #be     
#c_/d yards of print1 #ab little shawls 
and #af yards of flannel4 #bfth1 box in 
the ,orphan-,house #es4 #i;d41 #d;d4    
#bgth1 two pairs of shoes4 #bhth1 #cs4  
#h #a_/b;d4 #bith1 #bs4 #f;d41 #f;d41   

#d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d4 ,august #ast1 #ds41 
#al4 #aj41 two chemises1 three night    
caps1 and ten pocket handkerchiefs2 two 
chemises1 three night caps1 and six     
pocket handkerchiefs4 #bnd1 #h;d41 #as41
 #as4 #c;d41 #as4 #c;d41 #as41 #as41    
#f;d441 #es41 #bs4 #f;d41 #as41 #a;d41  
#a;d41 one patch work quilt4 #eth1 #fs4 
#hth1 #ds4 #ajth1 a box1 six canisters1 
and an inkstand1 #acth1 #es4 #aeth1     
#al41 ,s4 ,s4 #bs4 #f;d41 #ds4 #afth1   
#f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41      
#f;d41 #as41 #as4 #f;d4 #aith1 #as4 #b  
#a_/b;d4 #bcrd1 #as41 #ajs41 #al41 #bs4 
#f;d4 ,september #ast1 #as4 #f;d41 #bs4 
#f;d41 #bs41 #as41 #d;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41 
#f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #as4     
#f;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #b;d41 #al41 #al41 
twelve chemises1 one worn stuff frock1  
#d;d41 #d;d41 a basket of apples1 and   
three pounds of sugar4 #crd1 #al41 #el4 
#eth1 #abs4 #gth1 #es41 #bs4 #f;d4 #hth1
 #es4 #acth1 #as41 #as41 #as41 #bs4     
#f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4     
#f;d41 #bs4 #c;d41 #as41 #as4 #a;d41    

#as4 #a;d41 #b;d41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #bs4   
#f;d41 #f;d4 #adth1 #al41 #ajs41 #ajs41 
#ad pinafores1 a basket of apples4      
#aith1 #hs41 #bs4 #f;d4 ,box in the     
,orphan-,house #al4 #fs4 #a #a_/d;d41   
#ajs4 #bjth1 #f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41
 #a;d1 #d;d4 #bgth1 several numbers of  
the ,record were sent to be sold for the
 benefit of the ,orphan-,house1 #d;d41  
#d;d41 #bs41 #bs4 #f;d4 #cjth1 #al4 was 
given as ,a ,thank-offering for         
spiritual mercies vouchsafed to a child4
 ,also ,mr4 ,b-sen41 ,surgeon1 kindly   
offered1 today1 to give his attendance  
and medicine gratuitously to the        
orphans4 ,october #ast1 #f;d41 #d;d41   
#d;d41 #d;d4 ,a worn cloak4 #crd1 #es41 
#cs4 #c;d41 #as4 ,a gallon of dried     
peas4 #dth1 #al4 #cs4 #f;d4 #ajth1 #ds41
 #as4 #a;d41 #as4 #a;d41 #as4 #a;d41    
#as4 #aath1 #ajs41 #b;d41 #f;d41 #cs4   
#c;d4 #adth1 #d #a_/b gallons of beer4  
#afth1 three tippets1 #h;d41 #d;d41     
#es41 #es41 #es41 #bs4 #f;d41 #bs4      
#f;d41 #ajs41 #ajs41 #bs41 #as41 #as41  

#bs4 #f;d41 #es4 #agth1 #ds4 #ahth1     
#ajs41 #f;d41 #f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41      
#f;d41 #a;d41 #d;d41 #as4 #aith1 #al4   
#bdth1 #ds4 #beth1 three frocks1 two    
pinafores1 two tippets1 three pairs of  
sleeves1 #ajs41 #ajs41 #d;d41 #as4      
#bgth1 three tippets4 ,anonymously was  
sent by post1 #ajs41 with the request   
that prayer should be made for the      
donor1 for divine guidance under        
circumstances of much doubt and anxiety4
 #bith1 #ab cloth tippets4 #cast1 #ds4  
,november #bnd1 #as4 #c;d41 #as4 #c;d41 
#as4 #dth1 two little cloaks1 four      
quarterns of bread4 #eth1 two turkeys1  
#f;d41 #d;d41 #d;d41 #d;d4 ,there was   
also given by a brother ,l#ajj4--,l#ej4 
of which was previously promised1 to    
ensure the rent for premises4 ,it is a  
remarkable fact concerning this         
donation1 that ,i had1 in ,december of  
last year1 repeatedly asked the ,lord to
 incline the heart of this brother to   
give one hundred pounds1 and ,i made a  
memorandum of this prayer in my journal 

of ,december #ab1 #ahce4 ,on ,january   
#beth1 #ahcf1 fifty pounds was promised 
by him1 and on ,november #e1 fifty      
pounds besides that sum was given2 but  
it was not till some days after1 that ,i
 remembered1 that the very sum1 for     
which ,i had asked the ,lord1 had been  
given4 ,thus we often may receive an    
answer to prayer1 and scarcely remember 
that it is an answer4 ,when it came to  
my mind that this prayer had been noted 
down in my journal1 and ,i showed it to 
the donor1 we rejoiced together2 he1 to 
have been the instrument in giving1 and 
,i to have had1 the request granted4    
,november #fth1 ,s4 ,s4 #gs4 #f;d4 #gth1
 anonymously was sent a ton of coals1   
#ds41 one petticoat1 two pairs of       
gloves1 two ruffs4 #hth1 #el41 #bs4     
#b;d41 #cs41 #bs4 #b;d41 #bs4 #b;d41    
#as4 #f;d41 #b;d41 #f;d41 #as4 #f;d41   
#bs4 #f;d41 #bs4 #f;d4 #adth1 there was 
given #bjl4 for the ,orphan-house1 and  
#bjl4 for the ,infant-,orphan-,house4   
,both papers1 in which the money was    

enclosed1 contained these words3 ,if the
 ,lord prolongs the life of the unworthy
 giver of the enclosed1 the same sum    
will be given at ,christmas4--,it has   
been more than once observed to me that 
,i could not expect to continue to      
receive large sums2 for that persons1   
when first such an institution is       
established1 might be stirred up to give
 liberally1 but that afterwards one had 
to look to a number of regular          
subscribers1 and that1 if those were    
lacking1 it was not likely that such a  
work could go on4 ,on such occasions1 ,i
 have said but little2 but ,i have had  
the fullest assurance1 that it is a     
small matter for the ,lord to incline   
donors to give liberally1 a second or   
third time1 if it were for our real     
welfare4 ,and accordingly the donor1    
above referred to1 added to the first   
#ejl4 another #ejl41 and the last       
mentioned benefactor1 to the #ejl41     
given on a former occasion1 added the   
just mentioned #djl41 with the promise  

to give another #djl4 at ,christmas4 ,i 
would only add on this subject1 that    
there are some subscribers1 and even    
some who give considerably2 yet ,i would
 state1 for the ,lord's glory1 that if  
they were twenty times as many1 ,i      
should desire that my eyes might not be 
directed to them1 but to the ,lord      
alone1 and that ,i might be enabled to  
take the payment of every subscription  
as a donation from ,,him4 ,on the other 
hand1 if there were no subscribers at   
all1 yet the ,lord1 who heareth prayer1 
is rich to give according to our        
need4--,there was given also today1 ,a  
widow's mite1 #ajs4--also #d;d4         
,november #adth1 #ds41 also four ducks4 
,for the ,infant-,orphan-,house1 five   
frocks1 four shirts1 four chemises1 a   
bed gown1 two petticoats2 three         
quarterns bread4 #aeth #f;d41 #f;d41    
#d;d41 #f;d41 #d;d4 #afth1 by sale of   
trinkets1 #al4 #es41 #ds4 #ahth1        
anonymously were sent a boy's cap1 a    
bonnet1 a small piece of print4 #aith1  

four quarterns of bread4 #bast1 #ds41   
#bs4 #f;d4 #bbnd1 #d;d41 #f;d41 #f;d4   
#bcrd1 three frocks1 a tippet1 six pairs
 of sheets1 three pairs of blankets4    
#beth1 #ab hymn books1 a worn cloak1 a  
new tent bedstead4 #bgth1 anonymously   
put into ,bethesda boxes #es4 #bhth1    
#ds4 #bith1 two turkeys4 #cjth1 #ajs41  
five yards of blanketing1 a worn shawl4 
,december #ast1 a patch-work quilt and  
five yards of print1 #c;d41 #ajs4 #dth1 
#el4 #es4 #eth1 #ds41 #al4 #es4 #fth1   
#f;d41 #b;d41 a worn cloak1 a petticoat1
 a piece of linen for window curtains4  
#hth1 box in the ,orphan-,house #bl4    
#ds4 #a #a_/b;d4 #ith1 #al4 ,also #al4  
with ,mark ix4 #cf1 #cg1 written on the 
paper4 ,a most encouraging passage for  
this work1 the force of which ,i had    
never felt before4--,about a hundred    
weight of treacle4  ,i4 ,from this      
statement it appears1 that #ggjl4 #js4  
#i #a_/b;d4 has been actually given1 and
 that #djl4 is promised4 ,all the money1
 and all the articles of furniture1     

clothing1 provision1 c41 have been      
given1 without one individual having    
been asked by me for anything1 from     
which ,i have still refrained1 that the 
,lord's own hand might be clearly seen  
in the matter1 and that the whole might 
clearly appear as an answer to prayer4  
,,ii4 ,after frequent prayer1 that1 if  
it were the will of ,god1 ,he would be  
pleased to send us a ,matron and        
,governess for the                      
,infant-,orphan-,house1 this petition   
also has been answered4 ,in addition to 
this we obtained a convenient house for 
the purpose1 ,no4 #a1 ,wilson ,street1  
together with a piece of ground for a   
play-ground2 and we therefore began to  
furnish it on ,november #bast1 and on   
,november #bhth we took in the first    
children4  ,,iii4 ,of late it has       
appeared well to us to employ some of   
the strongest and eldest girls of the   
,orphan-,house in the work of the       
,infant-,orphan-,house1 under the       
direction of the ,matron and ,governess4

 ,from this plan it appeared the        
following advantages would result4 #ast4
 ,thus the wages which we should have to
 pay to assistants would be saved4 #bnd4
 ,without any further expense to the    
,institution1 we should in this way be  
able to support five or six orphans     
more4 #crd4 ,if thus the bigger girls of
 the ,orphan-,house pass through the    
,infant-,orphan-,house1 before they are 
sent into service1 they will be         
accustomed to nursery work1 which is so 
important for young servants4 #dth4     
,this plan would allow us to have the   
bigger girls longer under our care1 as  
we should have full employment for them4
  ,in the original paper follow eight   
other paragraphs1 containing the audited
 account and various other points of    
information respecting the two          
,orphan-,houses1 which1 at the time when
 this ,report was issued1 were of       
importance to the donors1 but are left  
out now1 as it seems desirable to make  
this edition of the ,narrative as       

concise as may be4 ,this plan has also  
been adopted concerning the three       
previous papers1 and will be further    
adhered to4  ,,george ,m,ue,l,l,e,r4    
,bristol1 ,dec4 #bj1 #ahcf4  ,december  
#ca4 ,we had this evening a             
prayer-meeting to praise the ,lord for  
,his goodness during the past year1 and 
to ask ,him for a continuance of ,his   
favours during the coming year4 ,we     
continued together till half-past       
eleven4 ,during the past year there have
 been received into the church of       
,gideon1 #bc brethren and sisters1 and  
into that of ,bethesda1 #bi--;altogether
 #eb4 ,of these #eb1 #ca have been      
brought to the knowledge of the ,lord   
through the instrumentality of brother  
,craik and me4 ,there have now been     
admitted into ,gideon ,church1 #gi      
brethren and sisters who have been      
converted through our instrumentality1  
and #hf into the ,church of ,bethesda3  
#afe seals to our ministry in ,bristol4 
,besides this1 several have fallen      

asleep in the faith who never were in   
communion with us2 several of our       
spiritual children are connected with   
other churches in and out of ,bristol2  
and many are now standing as hopeful    
characters on the list of candidates for
 fellowship4 ,there have been added to  
the church of ,gideon1 since we came to 
,bristol1 #aed2 to the church at        
,bethesda1 #aic--;altogether #cdg2 so   
that the number of both churches would  
be #dae 7#fh believers we found at      
,gideon71 had there been no changes2    
but3  ,of ,gideon church are under      
church discipline #e2 of ,bethesda #h2  
altogether #ac  ,do4 have fallen asleep 
#ae do4 #g do4 #bb  ,do4 have left      
,bristol #ab do4 #f do4 #ah  ,do4 have  
left us1 but are still in ,bristol 4 4  
#i do4 #d do4 #ac  #da #be #ff  ,there  
are1 therefore1 at present1 in          
fellowship with us at ,gideon #aha1 and 
at ,bethesda #afh--;altogether #cdi4    
,the ,lord has been pleased to give me  
during the past year1 as it regards my  

temporal supplies3--  #a4 ,in offerings 
through the boxes ,l#acc #hs4 #i;d4  #b4
 ,in presents of money1 from brethren in
 and out of ,bristol ,l#ef #acs4 #j;d4  
#c4 ,through family connexion ,l#e #js4 
#j;d4  #d4 ,besides this have been sent 
to us clothes1 provisions1 c41 which    
were worth to us at least ,l#cj #js4    
#j;d4  #e4 ,we have been living half    
free of rent during the last nine       
months1 whereby we have saved at least  
,l#g #ajs4 #j;d4  ,altogether ,l#bcb    
#aas4 #i;d4  ,january #b1 #ahcg4 ,this  
evening the two churches had again an   
especial prayer-meeting1 which was      
continued till half-past ten4  ,january 
#e4 ,today a sister called and told me  
about the conversion of her father1 who1
 in his eightieth year1 after having for
 many years lived openly in sin1 is at  
last brought to the knowledge of the    
,lord4 ,may this encourage the children 
of ,god to continue to pray for their   
aged parents and other persons2 for this
 sister had long prayed for the         

conversion of her father1 and at last1  
though only after twenty years1 the     
,lord gave her the desire of her heart4 
,it was an especial refreshment to my   
spirit to hear the particulars of this  
case1 as ,i had known so much of the    
sinful life of this aged sinner4        
,january #ca1 and ,february #b4 ,these  
two days we have had especial meetings  
for prayer and humiliation1 on account  
of the influenza1 to acknowledge the    
hand of ,god in this chastisement1 as   
the disease is so prevalent in ,bristol4
  ,april #h4 ,there are now #fj         
,children in the two ,orphan-,houses1   
#cj in each4  ,april #bb4 ,the ,lord has
 mercifully stayed the typhus fever in  
the ,orphan-,house1 in answer to prayer4
 ,there were only two cases1 and the    
children are recovering4  ,april #bd4   
,this evening we had a comfortable      
meeting with #cj brethren and sisters   
over the ,word4 7,of late brother ,craik
 and ,i have frequently set apart an    
evening1 generally once a week1 to meet 

with ten1 twenty or thirty brethren and 
sisters1 to take tea with them1 and to  
spend the rest of the evening in prayer 
and meditation over the ,scriptures4 ,we
 began these meetings chiefly on account
 of having thus an opportunity of seeing
 more of the saints1 as the greatness of
 the number of those in communion with  
us makes it impossible to see them as   
often in their houses1 as it might be   
profitable1 or as often as we desire4   
,we commenced these meetings in our own 
houses1 choosing those in particular1 of
 whom we had seen little4 ,after we had 
had several meetings in our own houses1 
we were invited by the brethren and     
sisters1 and they have asked others to  
meet us4 ,sometimes also we have        
proposed those for invitation whom we   
see but seldom4 ,these meetings we have 
found both for ourselves and others very
 useful1 and they will1 no doubt1       
continue to be a blessing1 as long as   
the ,lord shall enable us to precede and
 follow them with prayer4 ,they are also

 particularly important as a means of   
the brethren becoming acquainted with   
each other1 and of uniting their        
hearts47  ,may #ac4 ,today ,i have had  
again much reason to mourn over my      
corrupt nature1 particularly on account 
of want of gratitude for the many       
temporal mercies by which ,i am         
surrounded4 ,i was so sinful as to be   
dissatisfied on account of the dinner1  
because ,i thought it would not agree   
with me1 instead of thanking ,god for   
the rich provision1 and asking heartily 
the ,lord's blessing upon it1 and       
remembering the many dear children of   
,god who would have been glad of such a 
meal4 ,i rejoice in the prospect of that
 day when1 in seeing ,jesus as ,he is1  
,i shall be like ,him4 ,may #ad4        
,lord's-day4 ,the ,lord1 instead of     
chastising me today for the ingratitude 
and discontent1 of yesterday1 by leaving
 me to my own strength in preaching1 and
 bringing temporal want upon me1 has    
given me a good day4 ,i have preached   

with much assistance and comfort1 and   
the ,lord has given me rich temporal    
supplies3 for besides the freewill      
offerings of #bl4 #hs4 #aj;d41 a #el4   
note was put into my hand for the supply
 of any want ,i may have4 ,thus the     
,lord melted the heart by love1 and made
 me still more see the baseness of my   
conduct yesterday4 ,thanks be to ,god1  
the day is coming1 when ,satan will     
triumph no more6  ,may #ah4 ,there are  
now #fd children in the two             
,orphan-,houses1 and two more are       
expected1 which will fill the two       
houses4  ,may #bh4 ,the narrative of    
some of the ,lord's dealings with me is 
now near being published1 which has led 
me again most earnestly this day week1  
and repeatedly since1 to ask the ,lord  
that ,he would be pleased to give me    
what is wanting of the #ajjjl41 for     
which sum ,i have asked ,him on behalf  
of the orphans2 for though1 in my own   
mind1 the thing is as good as done1 so  
much so1 that ,i have repeatedly been   

able to thank ,god1 that ,he will surely
 give me every shilling of that sum1 yet
 to others this would not be enough4 ,as
 the whole matter1 then1 about the      
,orphan-,house had been commenced for   
the glory of ,god1 that in this way     
before the world and the church there   
might be another visible proof1 that the
 ,lord delights in answering prayer2 and
 as there was yet a part of the #ajjjl4 
wanting2 and1 as ,i earnestly desired1  
the book might not leave the press1     
before every shilling of that sum had   
been given1 in answer to prayer1 without
 one single individual having been asked
 by me for any thing1 that thus ,i might
 have the sweet privilege of bearing my 
testimony for ,god in this book3--for   
these reasons1 ,i say1 ,i have given    
myself earnestly to prayer about this   
matter since ,may #ba4 ,on ,may #bb came
 in #gl4 #ajs41 and on ,may #bc1 #cl4   
,on ,may #bd a lady1 whom ,i never saw  
before1 called on me and gave me #djl4  
,this circumstance has greatly          

encouraged me2 for the ,lord showed me  
thereby afresh ,his willingness to      
continue to send us large sums1 and that
 they can even come from individuals    
whom we have never seen before4 ,on ,may
 #bfth #cl4 #fs4 was sent1 from two     
unexpected quarters4 ,on ,may #bg was   
sent anonymously1 a parcel of worn      
clothes from ,london and a sovereign4   
,today 7,may #bh7 ,i received again #dl4
 #cs4 #f;d42 and also a parcel was sent 
from a considerable distance1 containing
 seven pairs of socks1 and the following
 trinkets1 to be sold for the support of
 the orphans3 #a gold pin with an ,irish
 pearl1 #ae ,irish pearls1 #b pine1 #b  
brooches1 #b lockets1 #a seal1 #b studs1
 #aa rings1 #a chain1 and #a bracelet1  
all of gold4  ,june #ae4 ,today ,i gave 
myself once more earnestly to prayer    
respecting the remainder of the #ajjjl4 
,this evening #el4 was given1 so that   
now the whole sum is made up4 ,to the   
glory of the ,lord1 whose ,i am1 and    
whom ,i serve1 ,i would state again1    

that every shilling of this money1 and  
all the articles of clothing and        
furniture1 which have been mentioned in 
the foregoing pages1 have been given to 
me1 without one single individual having
 been asked by me for any thing4 ,the   
reason why ,i have refrained altogether 
from soliciting any one for help is1    
that the hand of ,god evidently might be
 seen in the matter1 that thus my       
fellow-believers might be encouraged    
more and more to trust in ,him1 and that
 also those who know not the ,lord1 may 
have a fresh proof that1 indeed1 it is  
not a vain thing to pray to ,god4 ,as   
the ,lord then has con-descended most   
fully1 and even above my expectations1  
to answer my prayers1 arid to ,fill my  
mouth 7,psalm lxxxi4 #aj17 will you help
 me1 brethren and sisters beloved in the
 ,lord1 to praise ,him for ,his         
condescension4 ,it is a wonderful thing 
that such a worthless1 faithless servant
 as ,i am1 should have power with ,god4 
,take courage from this for yourselves1 

brethren4 ,surely1 if such a one as ,i  
am1 so little conformed to the mind of  
,jesus1 has his prayers answered1 may   
not you also1 at last1 have your        
requests granted to you4 ,during        
eighteen months and ten days this       
petition has been brought before ,god   
almost daily4 ,from the moment ,i asked 
it1 till the ,lord granted it fully1 ,i 
had never been allowed to doubt that ,he
 would give every shilling of that sum4 
,often have ,i praised ,him beforehand  
in the assurance1 that he would grant my
 request4 ,the thing after which we have
 especially to seek in prayer is1 that  
we believe that we receive1 according to
 ,mark xi4 #bd4 ,what things soever ye  
desire1 when ye pray1 believe that ye   
receive them1 and ye shall have them4   
,but this ,i often find lacking in my   
prayers4 ,whenever1 however1 ,i have    
been enabled to believe that ,i receive1
 the ,lord has dealt with me according  
to my faith4 ,this moment while ,i am   
writing 7,june #bh1 #ahcg71 ,i am       

waiting on the ,lord for #agl4 #ajs41   
the rent for two school-rooms1 which    
will be due in three days1 and ,i have  
but #cl4 towards that sum4 ,i believe   
,god can give2 ,i believe ,god is       
willing to give it1 if it be for our    
real welfare2 ,i also have repeatedly   
asked ,god for it2 but as yet ,i cannot 
in the triumph of faith praise ,him     
beforehand1 that ,he will assuredly give
 me this small sum4 ,i am waiting at    
every delivery of letters1 at every ring
 at the bell1 for help2 ,i am truly     
waiting on ,god1 and ,god alone for it2 
but as yet ,i do not feel as sure of    
being able to pay the rent of those     
school rooms1 as ,i should1 if ,i had   
the money already in my pocket4  ,as the
 ,lord has so greatly condescended to   
listen to my prayers1 and as ,i consider
 it one of the particular talents which 
,he has intrusted to me1 to exercise    
faith upon ,his promises regarding my   
own temporal wants and those of others2 
and as an ,orphan-,house for boys above 

seven years of age seems greatly needed 
in this city2 and as also1 without it1  
we know not how to provide for the      
little boys1 in the                     
,infant-,orphan-,house when they are    
above seven years of age2 ,i purpose to 
establish an ,orphan-,house for about   
forty boys above seven years of age4    
,but there are three difficulties in the
 way1 which must first be removed1      
before ,i could take any further step in
 this work4 #a4 ,my hands are more than 
filled already through the work arising 
from the ministry of the ,word1 the     
attending to the ordering of church     
affairs1 and the oversight of #cgj      
brethren and sisters4 ,and yet1 in      
addition to this1 ,i have also the work 
which comes upon me in connexion with   
the six day-schools1 a ,sunday-school1  
an adult-school1 the two                
,orphan-,houses1 and the circulation of 
the ,scriptures4 7,this latter part of  
the work is more and more increasing2   
for merely within the last seven months 

#hcf copies of the ,scriptures have been
 circulated74 ,for these reasons1 then1 
,i could not in any degree enlarge the  
field of labour1 except the ,lord should
 be pleased to send us a brother1 who1  
as steward1 could take from me the work 
which arises from keeping the accounts1 
obtaining and circulating the           
,scriptures1 giving advice in ordinary  
matters respecting the ,orphan-,houses1 
attending to the applications for       
admission of children in the            
,orphan-,houses1 c4 ,but whether there  
is an ,orphan-,house for boys           
established or not1 such a brother is   
greatly needed1 even as the extent of   
the work is now1 and ,i therefore lay it
 on the hearts of the believers who may 
read this1 to help me with their        
prayers1 that such a brother may be     
found4 #b4 ,in addition to this1 it     
would be needful1 before ,i could take  
any further step1 to obtain a truly     
pious master for the boys1 add other    
suitable individuals who may be needed  

to take care of the children4 #c4 ,the  
third thing by which ,i desire to be    
assured1 that it is the will of ,god    
that ,i should go forward in the        
,orphan-,house is1 that ,he provide the 
means for such an enlargement of the    
work4 ,whilst1 on the one hand ,i would 
confess to the praise of ,god1 that ,he 
has been pleased to give me faith to    
trust in ,him2 yet1 on the other hand1  
,i desire to be kept from presumption   
and enthusiasm4 ,i do not intend to wait
 till thousands are raised1 or till the 
,institution is endowed2 but ,i must    
have such a sum given to me as is needed
 to furnish a house for forty boys1 and 
to clothe that number1 and to have a    
little to begin with3 without such a sum
 ,i should not consider it to be the    
will of ,god to enlarge the field4 ,what
 ,i ask then from the brethren who may  
feel interested in seeing an            
,orphan-,house for boys established in  
,bristol is1 that they would help me    
with their prayers1 that if it be the   

will of ,god1 ,he ,himself would be     
pleased to remove these three           
difficulties out of the way4  ,whilst   
the preceding pages of the first edition
 of this ,narrative were in the press1  
and before the reception of the last    
proof sheet for correction1 the same    
friend who gave me on ,may #bd1 #ahcg1  
,forty ,pounds for the orphans1 and whom
 up to that time ,i had never seen1 gave
 on ,july #ab1 #ahcg1 ,four ,hundred and
 ,sixty ,pounds more1 being altogether  
,five ,hundred ,pounds4  ,,review ,,of  
,,the ,,last ,,five ,,years1 ,,the      
,,time ,,that ,i ,,have  ,,laboured ,,in
 ,,bristol ,,with ,,brother ,,craik4    
,,july1 #ahcg4  ,i4 ,some of the mercies
 which the ,lord has granted to us      
during this period4  ,concerning all    
this time ,i have most especially to    
say1 that goodness and mercy have       
followed me every day4 ,my blessings    
have been many and great1 my trials few 
and small4 ,to the praise of ,god ,i    
will mention a few of the many mercies  

which ,he has bestowed on me4  #a4 ,i   
consider it one of the especial mercies 
that1 amidst so many engagements ,i have
 been kept in the ways of ,god1 and that
 this day ,i have as much desire as     
ever1 yea more than ever1 to live alone 
for ,him1 who has done so much for me4  
,my greatest grief is that ,i love ,him 
so little4 ,i desire many things        
concerning myself2 but ,i desire nothing
 so much1 as to have a heart filled with
 love to the ,lord4 ,i long for a warm  
personal attachment to ,him4  #b4 ,i    
consider it likewise a great mercy1 for 
which ,i can never sufficiently praise  
,god1 that1 whilst during these last    
five years so many of ,his children have
 fallen into great errors1 and even     
those who once ran well1 ,i1 who am so  
faithless to ,him1 should have been kept
 from them4 ,there is scarcely one point
 of importance1 comparatively speaking1 
respecting which ,i have had scriptural 
reason to alter my views1 since ,i have 
come to ,bristol4 ,my views concerning  

the fundamental truths of the gospel are
 the same as they were at the end of the
 year #ahbi though ,i have been more and
 more established in them during these  
last five years1 and have seen more     
minutely the mind of ,god concerning    
many truths4 ,my relish for the study of
 the word of ,god has not decreased4    
#c4 ,i consider it further an exceeding 
great mercy1 that ,i have been kept in  
uninterrupted love and union with my    
brother1 friend1 and fellow-labourer1   
,henry ,craik4 ,very few of the         
blessings that the ,lord has bestowed on
 him1 on me1 and on the two churches1   
whose servants we are1 are of greater   
importance4 ,there is not one point of  
importance1 as it regards the truth1 on 
which we differ4 ,in judgment1 as to    
matters connected with the welfare of   
the saints among whom we labour1 we have
 been almost invariably at once of one  
mind4 7,lord1 to ,thee is the praise due
 for this6667 ,we are as much1 or more  
than ever united in spirit2 and if the  

,lord permit1 we desire to labour       
together till ,he come4 ,who that knows 
the proneness in man to seek his own1   
and to get glory to himself2 who that   
knows that the heart naturally is full  
of envy2 who that is acquainted with the
 position which we both hold in the     
church1 and the occasions thereby       
occurring for the flesh to feel         
offended3--who that considers these     
things will not ascribe our union1 our  
uninterrupted union and love1 entirely  
to the ,lord8 ,let the brethren among   
whom we labour praise ,god much for it6 
,let the brethren everywhere1 who may   
read this1 praise ,god for it6 ,this    
union has glorified ,god6 ,this union   
has sprung from ,god6 ,but1 for this    
union we depend now as much as ever upon
 ,god1 and therefore let the brethren   
pray1 that ,god in mercy would give us  
grace1 to put aside every thing that    
might hinder it4  #d4 ,we have had much 
joy on account of the scriptural conduct
 of many of the children of ,god among  

whom we labour4 ,the two churches have  
on the whole shown1 in some measure1    
that even in our day there can be love  
among the brethren4 ,i do not mean that 
we have been without trials on account  
of the behaviour of the saints under our
 care2 nor do ,i mean to say1 that      
either we or they have followed ,christ 
as we might or ought to have done2 but  
only1 that we have been mercifully kept 
hitherto from great divisions2 that the 
cases in which acts of discipline were  
needed 7as the list at the end of the   
last two years shows7 were so few2 that 
we have had much more joy than sorrow on
 account of the brethren and            
sisters3--these are matters1 worthy to  
be noticed among the special blessings  
which ,god has bestowed on us during the
 last five years4  #e4 ,another mercy ,i
 mention is1 that it has pleased ,god to
 keep us from some most awful           
characters1 who either actually had     
proposed themselves for fellowship1 or  
desired to do so1 and who1 so far as the

 testimony by word of mouth went1 could 
fully satisfy us4 ,from several such    
individuals who lived in open sin1 we   
have been kept1 by the ,spirit          
constraining them to confess1 and that1 
perhaps1 even against their own will1   
their wicked deeds1 which they were     
practicing2 in other instances we       
suspected them1 and1 on making inquiry1 
found out their sins4  #f4 ,another     
mercy which the ,lord has kindly        
bestowed on us is1 that though neither  
,brother ,craik nor ,i am strong in     
body1 yet we have been helped through   
much work2 and1 at the time when we were
 laid aside1 the ,lord made up our lack 
of service1 either by sending help from 
without1 or by putting into exercise the
 gifts of the brethren among us4 ,at    
those seasons disunion might so easily  
have sprung up among the brethren2 but  
the good shepherd of the sheep watched  
so graciously over the flock1 that they 
were kept together in much love and     
union1 whereby also a testimony was     

given for ,god1 that their faith stood  
not in the power of man4  #g4           
,sometimes1 when particular trials were 
laid on us1 and things appeared very    
dark1 the ,lord most mercifully not only
 supported us under those trials1 but   
also unexpectedly delivered us much     
sooner out of them1 than we could have  
at all anticipated4 ,may this especially
 encourage brethren who labour in word  
and doctrine1 or who rule in the church1
 to trust in the ,lord in ,seasons of   
peculiar trial6  #h4 ,my temporal wants 
have all these five years been most     
richly supplied1 so that not once have  
,i lacked the necessaries of life1 and  
generally ,i have abounded2 and all this
 without having one shilling of regular 
income4 ,i am not tired of this way of  
living1 nor have ,i even for once been  
allowed to regret having begun to live  
in this way4  ,,ii4 ,the work of the    
,lord in our hands4  #a4 ,it has pleased
 the ,lord to continue to bless the word
 preached by us to the conversion of    

many sinners1 and there seems to have   
been no period during these five years1 
in which this work has been stopped by  
,him4 ,there have come again several    
cases before us lately1 in which        
individuals have been recently brought  
to apprehend their lost state by nature1
 and to see that ,jesus of ,nazareth    
alone can save them4 ,the whole number  
of those who have been converted through
 our instrumentality in ,bristol1 and   
who have been received into fellowship  
with us is #agh2 besides this1 the ,lord
 has given us many seals to our ministry
 in this city1 but the individuals are  
now either only standing on the list of 
candidates for fellowship1 or are united
 to other churches in and out of        
,bristol1 or have fallen asleep before  
they were united to us4  #b4 ,the whole 
number of the brethren and sisters1 now 
in fellowship with us1 is #cgj3 #ahi at 
,gideon1 #aha at ,bethesda4  #c4 ,it is 
now three years and four months since   
brother ,craik and ,i began1 in         

dependence upon the ,lord for funds1 to 
seek to help the spread of the ,gospel  
through the instrumentality of schools1 
the circulation of the ,holy            
,scriptures1 and by aiding ,missionary  
exertions4 ,since then there have been  
circulated through our instrumentality  
#djcj copies of the ,scriptures2 four   
,day-,schools for poor children have    
been established by us2 #aaai children  
have been instructed in the six         
,day-,schools1 and #cec children are now
 in those six ,day-,schools4 ,besides   
this1 a ,sunday-,school1 and an         
,adult-,school have been supplied with  
all they needed1 and ,missionary        
exertions in the ,east ,indies1 in      
,upper ,canada1 and on the ,continent of
 ,europe1 have been aided4 ,in addition 
to this the word of ,god has been       
preached from house to house among the  
poor1 in connexion with the ,scriptural 
,knowledge ,institution1 by brother     
,c-r1 within the last two years4  #d4   
,there have been received into the      

,orphan-,houses #gd orphans1 and there  
are now #fd in them4  ,and now1 in      
conclusion1 ,i would say that the       
reason1 why ,i have spoken so plainly   
about the sins of my unconverted days1  
is1 that ,i may magnify the riches of   
the grace of ,god1 which has been       
bestowed on me1 a guilty wretch4 ,i have
 weighed much whether ,i should do so or
 not1 knowing well what contempt it may 
bring on me2 but it appeared to me1     
after much prayer1 that as the object of
 this little work is to speak well of   
the ,lord1 ,i should say in a few words 
what ,i once was1 in order that it might
 be seen so much the more clearly1 what 
,he has done for me4 ,i also judged     
that1 in doing so1 some1 who live at    
present in sin1 might see through my    
example the misery into which sin leads1
 even as it regards the present life1   
and the happiness which is connected    
with the ways of ,god2 and that they    
also might be encouraged through what   
,god has done for me1 to turn to ,him4  

,i have made myself therefore a fool1   
and degraded myself in the eyes of the  
inhabitants of ,bristol1 that you1 my   
dear unconverted fellow sinners1 who may
 read this1 may1 with ,god's blessing1  
be made wise4 ,the love of ,christ has  
constrained me to speak about my former 
lies1 thefts1 fraud1 c41 that you might 
be benefited4 ,do not think that ,i am a
 fool1 and therefore ,i have told out my
 heart in my folly2 but ,i have made    
myself a fool for the benefit of your   
souls4 ,may ,god in mercy1 for ,his dear
 ,son's sake1 grant that these pages may
 be a savour of life unto life to you6  
,the reason why ,i have spoken so       
plainly about some of the sins and      
errors into which ,i have fallen since  
my conversion1 and about my answers to  
prayer1 and the supplies of my temporal 
wants1 and some of my family concerns1  
and the success which ,god has given to 
our labours1--is not1 because ,i do not 
know that it is contrary to worldly     
custom1 and against the interests of my 

worldly reputation2 nor is it1 as if ,i 
made light of my falls2 nor as if ,i    
would boast in having had my prayers so 
often answered1 and having been in such 
a variety of ways used as an instrument 
in doing the ,lord's work2 but1 ,i have 
written what ,i have written for the    
benefit of my brethren4 ,i have         
mentioned some of my sins and errors1   
that through my loss the brethren who   
may read this may gain4 ,i have         
mentioned the answers of prayer1 that   
through them they may be encouraged to  
make known their requests unto ,god4 ,i 
have spoken about my temporal supplies1 
that through seeing how richly ,god has 
supplied my temporal wants1 since the   
commencement of #ahcj1 when ,i left     
,london1 they may be stirred up to seek 
first the kingdom of ,god and ,his      
righteousness1 resting assured1 that1 in
 doing so1 ,he will give them what is   
needful for the life that now is4 ,i    
have alluded to some family             
circumstances1 that children of ,god may

 be encouraged to cast their family     
burdens upon the ,lord1 in order that1  
in doing so1 they may find ,him carrying
 the burdens for them4 ,and lastly1 ,i  
have written about the success which    
,god has been pleased to grant us in    
,his work1 that it may be seen1 that1 in
 acting on scriptural principles1 we    
have the ,lord on our side1 and that our
 mode of preaching is honoured by ,him4 
,if in anything which ,i have written ,i
 have been mistaken 7and what human work
 is there which is free from error71 ,i 
have been mistaken after much prayer4   
,whilst writing ,i have often asked help
 of ,god4 ,whilst revising the work1 ,i 
have still again and again bowed my     
knees4 ,i have also frequently entreated
 the ,lord to bless this feeble effort  
of mine to speak to ,his praise1 and ,i 
have not the slightest hesitation in    
saying1 that1 from the earnestness and  
comfort which ,i have enjoyed in prayer1
 and from the sincere self-examination  
of my heart1 ,i know that ,god will     

bless this little work4 ,may ,i ask you 
then1 my brethren and sisters1 who have 
been benefited in reading this book1 to 
help me with your prayers1 that it may  
be blessed to others4 ,may ,i also ask  
you1 my brethren and sisters1 who think 
,i ought not to have published it1 to   
ask ,god to bless that which you        
yourselves consider good and scriptural 
in it4  ,and1 now last of all1 brethren 
beloved in the ,lord1 remember me in    
your prayers4  ,,end ,,of ,,the ,,first 
,,part