,transcribed from the #aijf ,macmillan and ,co4 edition by ,david ,price1 email ccx#jgdpglaf4org ,out of the ,deep3 ,,words ,,for ,,the ,,sorrowful4 ,,from ,,the ,,writings ,,of ,,charles ,,kingsley4 ,out of the deep have ,i cried unto ,thee1 ,o ,god4 ,london ,,macmillan ,,and ,,co41 ,,limited ,,new ,,york3 ,,the ,,macmillan ,,company #aijf ,all rights reserved ,printed by ,robert ,mac,lehose ,co4 ,ltd4 ,university ,press1 ,glasgow4 ,first ,edition #ahhj4 ,reprinted #ahhc1 #ahhe1 #ahhf1 #ahhg1 #ahhi1 #ahia1 #ahic1 #ahif1 #aijj1 #aijf ,,this ,,little ,,book ,,is ,dedicated ,,to ,,all ,,troubled ,,souls ,,and ,,to ,,the ,,dear ,,memory ,,of ,,one ,,who ,,passed ,,through ,,the ,,deep ,,into ,,eternal ,,rest4 ,f4 ,e4 ,k ,june #ab1ahhj4 ,i4 ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep ,,of ,,suffering ,,and ,,sorrow4 ,save me1 ,o ,god1 for the waters are come in even unto my soul3 ,i am come into deep waters2 so that the floods run over me4--,ps4 lxix4 #a1 #b4 ,i am brought into so great trouble and misery3 that ,i go mourning all the day long4--,ps4 xxxviii4 #f4 ,the sorrows of my heart are enlarged3 ,oh6 bring ,thou me out of my distress4--,ps4 xxv4 #ag4 ,the ,lord hath heard the voice of my weeping3 the ,lord will receive my prayer4--,ps4 vi4 #h4 ,in the multitude of the sorrows which ,i had in my heart1 ,thy comforts have refreshed my soul4--,ps4 xciv4 #ag4 ,each heart knows its own bitterness2 each soul has its own sorrow2 each man's life has its dark days of storm and tempest1 when all his joys seem blown away by some sudden blast of ill-fortune1 and the desire of his eyes is taken from him1 and all his hopes and plans1 all which he intended to do or to enjoy1 are hid with blinding mist1 so that he cannot see his way before him1 and knows not whither to go1 or whither to flee for help2 when faith in ,god seems broken up for the moment1 when he feels no strength1 no purpose1 and knows not what to determine1 what to do1 what to believe1 what to care for2 when the very earth seems reeling under his feet1 and the fountains of the abyss are broken up4 ,when that day comes1 let him think of ,god's covenant and take heart4 ,is the sun's warmth perished out of the sky because the storm is cold with hail and bitter winds8 ,is ,god's love changed because we cannot feel it in our trouble8 ,is the sun's light perished out of the sky because the world is black with cloud and mist8 ,has ,god forgotten to give light to suffering souls1 because we cannot see our way for a few short days of perplexity8 ,no4 ,god's message to every sad and desolate heart on earth1 is that ,god is ,light1 and in ,him is no darkness at all2 that ,god is ,love1 and in ,him there is no cruelty at all2 that ,god is ,one1 and in ,him there is no change at all4 ,and therefore we can pray boldly to ,him1 and ask ,him to deliver us in the time of our tribulation and misery2 in the hour of death1 whether of our own death or the death of those we love2 in the day of judgment1 whereof it is written--,it is ,god who justifieth us2 who is he that condemneth8 ,it is ,christ who died1 yea1 rather who is risen again1 who even now maketh intercession for us4 ,to that boundless love of ,god1 which ,he showed forth in the life of ,christ ,jesus2 to that perfect and utter will to deliver us which ,god showed forth in the death of ,christ ,jesus1 when the ,father spared not ,his own ,son1 but gave ,him freely for us2 to that boundless love we may trust ourselves1 our fortunes1 our families1 our bodies1 our souls1 and the bodies and souls of those we love4 ,national ,sermons4 ,to all1 sooner or later1 ,christ comes to baptise them with fire4 ,but do not think that the baptism of fire comes once for all to a man1 in some one terrible affliction1 some one awful conviction of his own sinfulness and nothingness4 ,no2 with many--and those perhaps the best people--it goes on month after month1 year after year4 ,by secret trials1 chastenings1 which none but they and ,god can understand1 the ,lord is cleansing them from their secret faults1 and making them to understand wisdom secretly2 burning out of them the chaff of self-will1 and self- conceit1 and vanity1 and leaving only the pure gold of righteousness4 ,how many sweet and holy souls1 who look cheerful enough before the eyes of man1 yet have their secret sorrows4 ,they carry their cross unseen all day long1 and lie down to sleep on it at night2 and they will carry it perhaps for years and years1 and to their graves1 and to the throne of ,christ before they lay it down2 and none but they and ,christ will ever know what it was2 what was the secret chastisement which ,god sent to make that soul better which seemed to us already too good for earth4 ,so does the ,lord watch ,his people1 and tries them with fire1 as the refiner of silver sits by his furnaces watching the melted metal till he knows that it is purged from all its dross by seeing the image of his own face reflected on it4 ,town and ,country ,sermons4 ,by sufferings was ,christ made perfect2 and what was the best path for ,jesus ,christ is surely good enough for us1 even though it be a rough and thorny one4 ,let us lie still beneath ,god's hand2 for though ,his hand be heavy upon us1 it is strong and safe beneath us too2 and none can pluck us out of ,his hand1 for in ,him we live and move and have our being4 ,he waits for us year after year1 with patience which cannot tire2 therefore1 let us wait awhile for ,him4 ,with ,him is plenteous redemption1 and therefore redemption enough for us and for those likewise whom we love4 ,and though we go down into hell with ,david1 with ,david we shall find ,god there 7,ps4 cxxxix4 #h2 ,ps4 xvi4 #aj71 and find that ,he does not leave our souls in hell1 nor suffer ,his holy ones to see corruption4 ,yes1 have faith in ,god4 ,nothing in thee which ,he has made shall see corruption2 for it is a thought of ,god's1 and no thought of ,his can perish4 ,nothing shall be purged out of thee1 but thy disease2 nothing shall be burnt out of thee but thy dross2 and that in thee of which ,god said in the beginning1 ,let us make man in our own image1 shall be saved and live to all eternity4 ,yes1 have faith in ,god1 and cry to ,him out of the deep1 ,though ,thou slay me1 yet will ,i love ,thee1 for ,thou lovedst me in ,jesus ,christ before the foundation of the world4 ,sermons--,good ,news of ,god4 ,oh1 sad hearts and suffering6 ,anxious and weary ones6 ,look to the cross of ,christ4 ,there hung your ,king6 ,the ,king of sorrowing souls1 and more1 the ,king of ,sorrows4 ,ay1 pain and grief1 tyranny and desertion1 death and hell--,he has faced them one and all1 and tried their strength1 and taught them ,his1 and conquered them right royally4 ,and since ,he hung upon that torturing cross1 sorrow is divine1 godlike1 as joy itself4 ,all that man's fallen nature dreads and despises1 ,god honoured on the cross1 and took unto ,himself1 and blest and consecrated for ever4 ,and now blessed are the poor1 if they are poor in heart as well as purse2 for ,jesus was poor1 and theirs is the kingdom of heaven4 ,blessed are the hungry1 if they hunger for righteousness as well as food2 for ,jesus hungered1 and they shall be filled4 ,blessed are those who mourn1 if they mourn not only for their sorrows1 but for their sins2 for ,jesus mourned for our sins1 and on the cross ,he was made sin for us1 who knew no sin2 and they shall be comforted4 ,blessed are those who are ashamed of themselves1 and hate themselves1 and humble themselves before ,god1 for on the cross ,jesus humbled ,himself2 and they shall be exalted4 ,blessed are the forsaken and despised2 did not all men forsake ,jesus in ,his hour of need8 ,and why not thee1 too1 thou poor deserted one8 ,shall the disciple be above his ,master8 ,no4 ,every one that is perfect must be as his ,master4 ,national ,sermons4 ,never let us get into the common trick of calling unbelief ,resignation2 of asking1 and then because we have not faith to believe1 putting in a ,thy will be done at the end4 ,let us make ,god's will our will1 and so say1 ,thy will be done4 ,there is a false as well as a true and holy resignation4 ,when the sorrow is come or coming1 or necessary apparently for others' good1 let us say with our ,master in the ,agony1 ,not what we will1 but what ,thou wilt6 ,but up to that point1 let us pray boldly4 ,letters and ,memories of ,charles ,kingsley4 ,christianity heightens as well as deepens the human as well as the divine affections4 ,i am happy2 for the less hope1 the more faith4 ,god knows what is best for us4 ,i am sure we do not4 ,continual resignation1 ,i begin to find1 is the secret of continual strength4 ,daily dying1 as ,boehmen interprets it1 is the path of daily living4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,in all the trials of life1 there is still some way of escape to be found if a man goes to the right place to look for it2 and1 if not of escape1 still of compensation4 ,i speak of that which ,i know4 ,of my own comfort ,i will not speak--of the path by which ,i attained it ,i will4 ,it was simply by not struggling1 doing my work vigorously where ,god had put me1 and believing firmly that ,his promises had a real1 not a mere metaphorical meaning1 and that ,psalms x41 xxvii41 xxxiv41 xxxvii41 cvii41 cxii41 cxxiii41 cxxvi41 cxlvi41 are as practically true for us as they were for the ,jews of old1 and that it is the faithlessness of this day which prevents men from accepting ,god's promises in their literal sense with simple childlike faith4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,do not fear the clouds and storm and rain2 look at the bow in the cloud1 in the very rain itself4 ,that is a sign that the sun1 though you cannot see it1 is shining still--that up above1 beyond the cloud1 is still sunlight and warmth and cloudless blue sky4 ,believe in ,god's covenant4 ,believe that the sun will conquer the clouds1 warmth will conquer cold1 calm will conquer storm1 fair will conquer foul1 light will conquer darkness1 joy will conquer sorrow1 life conquer death1 love conquer destruction and the devouring floods2 because ,god is light1 ,god is love1 ,god is life1 ,god is peace and joy eternal1 ,god is without change1 and labours to give life and joy and peace to man and beast and all created things4 ,this was the meaning of the rainbow4 ,it is a witness that ,god1 who made the world1 is the friend and preserver of man2 that ,his promises are like the everlasting sunshine which is above the clouds1 without spot or fading1 without variableness or shadow of turning4 ,national ,sermons4 ,if ,i did not believe in a special ,providence1 in a perpetual education of men by evil as well as good1 by small things as well as great--if ,i did not believe that--,i could believe nothing4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,let us be content2 we do not know what is good for us1 and ,god does4 ,it is true1 and you will find it true 7though ,god knows it is a difficult lesson enough to learn7 that there should be no greater comfort to ,christian people than to be made like ,christ by suffering patiently not only the hard work of every-day life1 but sorrows1 troubles1 and sicknesses1 and all our heavenly ,father's corrections1 whensoever1 by any manner of adversity1 it shall please ,his gracious goodness to visit them4 ,for ,christ ,himself went not up to joy1 but first ,he suffered pain4 ,he entered not into ,his glory before ,he was crucified4 ,therefore those words which we read in the ,visitation of the ,sick about this matter are not mere kind words1 meant to give comfort for the moment4 ,they are truth and fact and sound philosophy4 ,they are as true for the young lad in health and spirits as for the old folks crawling towards their graves4 ,it is true that sickness and all sorts of troubles are sent to correct and amend in us whatsoever doth offend the eye of our heavenly ,father4 ,it is true1 and you will find it true1 that whom the ,lord loveth ,he chasteneth4 ,all ,saints' ,day ,sermons4 ,that ye through patience and comfort of the ,scriptures might have hope1 says ,st4 ,paul2 and1 again1 ,let patience have her perfect work4 ,but where are we to get patience8 ,god knows it is hard in such a world as this for poor creatures to be always patient4 ,but faith can breed patience1 though patience cannot breed itself2 and faith in whom8 ,faith in our ,father in ,heaven1 even in ,almighty ,god ,himself4 ,he calls ,himself the ,god of ,patience and ,consolation4 ,pray for ,his ,holy ,spirit1 and ,he will make you patient2 pray for ,his ,holy ,spirit1 and ,he will console and comfort you4 ,he has promised that ,spirit of ,his--the ,comforter--the ,spirit of ,love1 ,trust1 and ,patience--to as many as ask ,him4 ,ask ,him at ,his ,holy ,table to make you patient2 ask ,him to change your wills into the likeness of ,his will4 ,then will your eyes be opened2 then will you see in the ,scriptures a sure promise of hope1 and glory1 and redemption for yourself and all the world2 then you will see in the blessed ,sacrament of the ,lord's body and blood a sure sign and warrant1 handed down from hand to hand1 from age to age1 from year to year1 from father to son1 that ,his promises shall be fulfilled--that patience shall have her perfect work--that hope shall become a reality--that not one of the ,lord's words shall fail or pass away till all be fulfilled4 ,national ,sermons4 ,god means some good to you by prostrating you--perhaps ,he means by giving you blessings almost without your asking1 to show you how little avails morbid sensitiveness or self-tormenting struggles4 ,synthetical minds are subject to this self-torture4 ,such a period in your life is the time to become again a little child6 ,i do not mean a re-regeneration1 but a permitting of the mind to assume that tone of calm wonder and infantile trust1 which will allow all the innate principles within--all ,god-bestowed graces which have been bruised and bowed by the tempest1 to blossom gently upwards again1 in the clear shining after rain--a breathing time in life--not too much retrospection or self-examination--keep that for the healthy and vigorous hours of the mind--but a silent basking in the light of ,god's presence--a time for faith1 more than for labour2 for general and unexpressed1 more than for particular or earnest prayer4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,sorrow1 though dreary1 is not barren4 ,nothing need be barren to those who view all things in their real light1 as links in the great chain of progression1 both for themselves and for the universe4 ,to us1 all ,time should seem so full of life2 every moment the grave and the father of unnumbered events and designs in heaven and earth1 revealing the mind of our ,god ,himself--all things moving smoothly and surely1 in spite of apparent checks and disappointments1 towards the appointed ,end6 ,letters and ,memories4 ,in all the chances and changes of this mortal life1 it is our one comfort to believe firmly and actively in the changeless kingdom1 and in the changeless ,king4 ,this alone will give us calm1 patience1 faith1 and hope1 though the heavens and the earth be shaken around us4 ,for so only shall we see that the kingdom1 of which we are citizens1 is a kingdom of light1 and not of darkness2 of truth1 and not of falsehood2 of freedom1 and not of slavery2 of bounty and mercy1 and not of wrath and fear2 that we live and move and have our being1 not in a ,deus quidam deceptor1 who grudges ,his children wisdom1 but in a ,father of ,light1 from whom comes every good and perfect gift2 who willeth that all men should be saved1 and come to the knowledge of the truth4 ,in ,his kingdom we are2 and in the ,king whom ,he has set over it we can have most perfect trust4 ,for us that ,king stooped from heaven to earth2 for us ,he was born1 for us ,he toiled1 for us ,he suffered1 for us ,he died1 for us ,he arose again1 for us ,he sits for ever at ,god's right hand4 ,and can we not trust ,him8 ,let ,him do what ,he will4 ,let ,him lead us whither ,he will4 ,wheresoever ,he leads must be the way of truth and life4 ,whatsoever ,he does1 must be in harmony with that infinite love which ,he displayed for us upon the ,cross4 ,whatsoever ,he does must be in harmony with that eternal purpose by which ,he reveals to men ,god their ,father4 ,therefore1 though the heaven and the earth be shaken around us1 we will trust in ,him2 for we know that ,he is the same yesterday1 to-day1 and for ever4 ,national ,sermons4 ,if we believe that ,god is educating men1 the when1 the where1 and the how1 are not only unimportant1 but considering ,who is the teacher1 unfathomable to us2 and it is enough to be able to believe that the ,lord of all things is influencing us through all things4 ,essays4 ,provided we attain at last to the truly heroic and divine life1 which is the life of virtue1 it will matter little to us by what strange and weary ways1 or through what painful and humiliating processes1 we have arrived thither4 ,if ,god has loved us1 if ,god will receive us1 then let us submit loyally and humbly to ,his law--,whom the ,lord loveth ,he chasteneth1 and scourgeth every son whom ,he receiveth4 ,all ,saints' ,day ,sermons4 ,i believe that the wisest plan of bearing sorrow is sometimes not to try to bear it--as long as one is not crippled for one's every-day duties--but to give way to sorrow1 utterly and freely4 ,perhaps sorrow is sent that we may give way to it1 and1 in drinking the cup to the dregs1 find some medicine in it itself which we should not find if we began doctoring ourselves1 or letting others doctor us4 ,if we say simply1 ,i am wretched1 ,i ought to be wretched2 then we shall perhaps hear a voice1 ,who made thee wretched but ,god8 ,then what can ,he mean but thy good8 ,and if the heart answers impatiently1 ,my good8 ,i don't want it1 ,i want my love6 perhaps the voice may answer1 ,then thou shalt have both in time4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,after all1 the problem of life is not a difficult one1 for it solves itself--so very soon at best--by death4 ,do what is right1 the best way you can1 and wait to the end to know4 4 4 4 ,if1 in spite of wars1 and fevers1 and accidents1 and the strokes of chance1 this world be green and fair1 what must the coming world be like8 ,let us comfort ourselves as ,st4 ,paul did 7in infinitely worse times71 that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that shall be revealed4 ,it is not fair to quote one text about the creation groaning and travailing without the other1 that it will not groan and travail long4 ,would the mother who has groaned and travailed and brought forth children--would she give up those children for the sake of not having had that pain8 ,then believe that the day will come when the world1 and every human being in it who has really groaned and travailed1 would not give up its past pangs for the sake of its then present perfection1 but will look back on this life1 as the mother does on past pain1 with glory and joy4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,i write to you because every expression of human sympathy brings some little comfort1 if it be only to remind such as you that you are not alone in the world4 ,i know nothing can make up for such a loss as yours4 #bf ,but you will still have love on earth all round you2 and his love is not dead4 ,it lives still in the next world for you1 and perhaps with you4 ,for why should not those who are gone1 if they are gone to their ,lord1 be actually nearer us1 not further from us1 in the heavenly world1 praying for us1 and it may be1 influencing and guiding us in a hundred ways1 of which we in our prison-house of mortality cannot dream8 ,yes1 do not be afraid to believe that he whom you have loved is still near you1 and you near him1 and both of you near ,god1 who died on the ,cross for you4 ,that is all ,i can say4 ,but what comfort there is in it1 if one can give up one's heart to believe it6 ,letters and ,memories4 4 4 4 ,all that ,i can say about the text1 ,matt4 xxii4 #cj of ,marriage in the world to come1 is that it has nought to do with me and my wife4 ,i know that if immortality is to include in my case identity of person1 ,i shall feel for her for ever what ,i feel now4 ,that feeling may be developed in ways which ,i do not expect2 it may have provided for it forms of expression very different from any which are among the holiest sacraments of life4 ,of that ,i take no care4 ,the union ,i believe to be eternal as my own soul1 and ,i leave all in the hands of a good ,god4 ,is not marriage the mere approximation to a unity that shall be perfect in heaven8 ,and shall we not be reunited in heaven by that still deeper tie8 ,surely if on earth ,christ the ,lord has loved--some more than others2--why should not we do the same in heaven1 and yet love all8 ,do ,i thus seem to undervalue earthly bliss8 ,no6 ,i enhance it when ,i make it the sacrament of a higher union6 ,will not this thought give more exquisite delight2 will it not tear off the thorn from every rose2 and sweeten every nectar cup to perfect security of blessedness in this life1 to feel that there is more in store for us--that all expressions of love here1 are but dim shadows of a union which will be perfect if we but work here1 so as to work out our own salvation8 ,letters and ,memories4 ,that is an awful feeling of having the roots which connect one with the last generation seemingly torn up1 and having to say1 ,now ,i am the root1 ,i stand self-supported1 with no other older stature to rest on4 #cj ,but this one must believe that ,god is the ,god of ,abraham1 and that all live to ,him1 and that we are no more isolated and self-supported than when we were children on our mother's bosom4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,believe that those who are gone are nearer us than ever2 and that if1 as ,i surely believe1 they do sorrow over the mishaps and misdeeds of those whom they leave behind1 they do not sorrow in vain4 ,their sympathy is a further education for them1 and a pledge1 too1 of help1 and1 ,i believe1 of final deliverance for those on whom they look down in love4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,blessed are the dead who die in the ,lord2 for they rest from their labours1 and their works do follow them4 ,they rest from their labours4 ,all their struggles1 disappointments1 failures1 backslidings1 which made them unhappy here1 because they could not perfectly do the will of ,god1 are past and over for ever4 ,but their works follow them4 ,the good which they did on earth--that is not past and over4 ,it cannot die4 ,it lives and grows for ever1 following on in their path long after they are dead1 and bearing fruit unto everlasting life1 not only in them1 but in men whom they never saw1 and in generations yet unborn4 ,good ,news of ,god--,sermons4 ,a little while and ye shall not see me1 and again a little while and ye shall see me1 because ,i go to the ,father1 said our ,lord when speaking of ,his own death to ,his sorrowing disciples4 ,and if it be so with ,christ1 then is it so with those who are ,christ's1 with those whom we love4 ,they are the partakers of ,his death1 therefore they are the partakers of ,his resurrection4 ,let us believe that blessed news in all its fulness1 and be at peace4 ,a little while and we see them1 and again a little while and we do not see them4 ,but why8 ,because they are gone to the ,father--to the source and fount of all life and power1 all light and love1 that they may gain life from ,his life1 power from ,his power1 light from ,his light1 love from ,his love--and surely not for nought4 ,surely not for nought4 ,for1 if they were like ,christ on earth1 and did not use their powers for themselves alone1 if they are to be like ,christ when they shall see ,him as ,he is1 the more surely will they not use their powers for themselves1 but as ,christ uses ,his1 for those they love8 ,surely1 like ,christ they may come and go even now unseen4 ,like ,christ they may breathe upon our restless hearts and say1 ,peace be unto you4 ,and not in vain--for what they did for us when they were yet on earth they can do more fully now that they are in heaven4 ,they may seem to have left us1 and we may weep and lament4 ,but the day will come when the veil shall be taken from our eyes and we shall see them as they are--with ,christ and in ,christ for ever--and remember no more our anguish1 for joy that another human being has entered into that one true1 real1 and eternal world1 wherein is neither disease1 disorder1 change1 decay1 nor death1 for it is none other than the bosom of the ,father4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,and what if earthly love seems so delicious that all change in it would seem a change for the worse1 shall we repine8 ,what does reason 7and faith1 which is reason exercised on the invisible7 require of us1 but to conclude that if there is change1 there will be something better there8 ,letters and ,memories4 ,what is the true everlasting life--the life of ,god and ,christ--but a life of love1 a life of perfect active1 self-sacrificing goodness1 which is the one only true life for all rational beings1 whether on earth or in heaven--in heaven as well as on earth4 ,form your own notions as you will about angels and saints in heaven1 7for every one must have some notions about them17 and try to picture to yourself what the souls of those whom you have loved and lost are doing in the other world2 but bear this in mind1 that if the saints in heaven live the everlasting life1 they must be living a life of usefulness1 of love1 and of good works4 ,there are those who believe what we are too apt to forget1 and that is that the everlasting life cannot be a selfish and idle life1 spent only in being happy oneself4 ,they believe that the saints in heaven are not idle--that they are eternally helping mankind1 doing all sorts of good offices for those souls who need them4 ,i cannot see why they should not be right4 ,for if the saints' delight was to do good on earth1 much more will it be to do good in heaven4 ,if they helped poor sufferers1 if they comforted the afflicted here on earth1 much more will they be willing to help and comfort them1 now that they are in the full power1 the full freedom1 the full love and zeal of the everlasting life4 ,if their hearts were warmed and softened by the fire of ,god's love here1 how much more there6 ,if they lived ,god's life of love here1 how much more there1 before the throne of ,god and the face of ,christ6 ,and if any one shall say that the souls of good men in heaven cannot help us who are here on earth1 ,i answer--,when did they ascend into heaven to find out that8 ,if they had ever been there1 let us be sure they would have had better news to bring home than this1 that those whom we have honoured and loved on earth have lost the power which they used once to have of comforting us who are struggling below4 ,no1 we will believe--what every one who loses a beloved friend comes sooner or later to believe--that those whom we have honoured and loved1 though taken from our eyes1 are near to our spirits2 that they still fight for us under the banner of their ,master1 ,christ1 and still work for us by virtue of ,his life of love1 which they live in ,him and by ,him for ever4 ,pray to them1 indeed1 we need not1 as if they would help us out of any self-will of their own4 ,they do ,god's will1 and not their own2 and go on ,god's errands1 and not their own4 ,if we pray to ,god our ,father ,himself1 that is enough for us4 ,and what shall we pray8 ,father1 ,thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven4 ,good ,news of ,god1 ,sermons4 ,is not that one thought that our beloved ones sleep in ,christ ,jesus enough8 ,they sleep in ,jesus1 and therefore in infinite tenderness1 sympathy1 care1 and love4 ,they sleep in ,jesus2 and ,he is the ,life1 and therefore they sleep in ,life4 ,they sleep in ,jesus2 and ,he is the ,light1 and therefore they sleep in ,light4 ,they sleep in ,jesus2 and ,he is ,love1 and therefore they sleep in ,love4 ,and what better8 ,this is better--that they who sleep in ,jesus must surely awaken4 ,for1 as it is written1 ,his is a quickening1 awakening1 life-giving ,spirit1 and so to sleep in ,him is to sleep in the very fount and core of life and power4 ,if from ,jesus all our powers and talents come here on earth1 surely ,he will give us more and nobler1 when we sleep in ,him1 and wake in ,him to a risen and eternal life4 ,and more1 it is written that them that sleep in ,jesus will ,he bring with ,him4 ,at the last day we shall see face to face those we loved--and before that--oh6 doubt it not4 ,oftentimes when ,christ draws near our spirits ,he comes not alone1 but loving souls1 souls whom we knew in the flesh on earth1 bear up ,his train1 and hover near our hearts and join their whispers to the voice and inspiration of ,him who loved us1 and who will guide us with counsel here1 and after that receive us into glory1 where we shall meet those beloved ones--not as our forefathers dreamed1 as meagre shadows flitting through dreary and formless chaos--but as we knew them once--the body of the flesh alone put off1 but the real body1 the spiritual body to which flesh and blood was but a husk and shell1 living and loving more fully1 more utterly1 than even before1 because it is in ,christ who is the fount of life1 and freed in ,him for ever from hell and death4 ,and if you wish for a sign that this is so1 come to holy communion and take the bread and wine as a sign that your bodies and theirs1 your souls and theirs1 are fed from the same fount of everlasting life--the dead and risen and ever living body of ,christ ,jesus1 which ,he has given to be the life of the world4 ,,mss4 ,sermons4 ,we know that afflictions do come--terrible bereavements1 sorrows sad and strange4 ,there they are1 ,god help us all4 ,but from whom do they come8 ,who is ,lord of life and death8 ,who is ,lord of joy and sorrow8 ,is not that the question of all questions8 ,and is not the answer the most essential of all answers8 ,it is the ,holy ,spirit of ,god2 the ,spirit who proceedeth from the ,father and the ,son2 the ,spirit of the ,father who so loved the world1 that ,he spared not ,his only begotten ,son2 the ,spirit of the ,son who so loved the world that ,he stooped to die for it upon the ,cross2 the ,spirit who is the ,comforter1 and says1 ,i have seen thy ways and will heal thee1 ,i will lead thee also1 and restore comforts to thee and to thy mourners4 ,i speak peace to him that is near and to him that is afar off1 saith the ,lord2 and ,i will heal him4 ,is not that the most blessed news1 that ,he who takes away1 is the very same as ,he who gives8 ,that ,he who afflicts is the very same as ,he who comforts8 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,oh6 blessed news1 that ,god ,himself is the ,comforter4 ,blessed news1 that ,he who strikes will also heal2 that ,he who gives the cup of sorrow will also give the strength to drink it4 ,blessed news1 that chastisement is not punishment1 but the education of a ,father4 ,blessed news1 that our whole duty is the duty of a child--of the ,son who said in ,his agony1 ,father1 not my will1 but ,thine be done4 ,blessed news1 that our ,comforter is the ,spirit who comforted ,christ the ,son ,himself2 who proceeds both from the ,father and the ,son1 and who will tell us that in ,christ we are really and literally the children of ,god1 who may cry to ,him in our extreme need1 ,father1 with full understanding of all that that royal word contains4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,,ii4 ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep ,,of ,,sin4 ,innumerable troubles are come about me4 ,my sins have taken such hold upon me1 that ,i am not able to look up2 yea1 they are more in number than the hairs of my head1 and my heart hath failed me4--,ps4 xl4 #ae4 ,i acknowledge my faults1 and my sin is ever before me4 ,against ,thee only have ,i sinned1 and done this evil in ,thy sight4--,ps4 li4 #c4 ,i said1 ,i will confess my sins unto the ,lord2 and so ,thou forgavest the wickedness of my sin4--,ps4 xxxii4 #f4 ,blessed is the man whose iniquity is forgiven1 and whose sin is purged4--,ps4 xxxii4 #a4 ,there is forgiveness with ,thee1 therefore shalt ,thou be feared4--,ps4 cxxx4 #a4 ,god is not against you but for you1 in all the struggles of life2 ,he wants you to get through safe2 wants you to succeed2 wants you to conquer2 and ,he will hear your cry out of the deep and help you4 ,and therefore when you find yourselves wrong1 utterly wrong1 do not cry to this man or that man1 ,do you help me2 do you set me a little more right before ,god comes1 and finds me in the wrong and punishes me4 ,cry to ,god ,himself1 to ,christ ,himself2 ask ,him to lift you up2 ask ,him to set you right4 ,do not be like ,st4 ,peter before his conversion1 and cry1 ,depart from me1 for ,i am a sinful man1 ,o ,lord2 wait a little till ,i have risen up1 and washed off my stains1 and made myself somewhat fit to be seen4--,no4 ,cry1 ,come quickly1 ,o ,lord--at once--just because ,i am a sinful man2 just because ,i am sore let and hindered in running my race by my own sins and wickedness2 because ,i am lazy and stupid2 because ,i am perverse and vicious1 therefore raise up ,thy power1 and come to me1 ,thy miserable creature1 ,thy lost child1 and with ,thy great might succour me4 ,lift me up1 because ,i have fallen very low2 deliver me1 for ,i have plunged out of ,thy sound and safe highway into deep mire where no ground is4 ,help myself ,i cannot1 and if ,thou help me not1 ,i am undone4 ,do so4 ,pray so4 ,let your sins and wickedness be to you not a reason for hiding from ,christ1 who stands by2 but a reason1 the reason of all reasons1 for crying to ,christ1 who stands by4 ,and then1 whether ,he delivers you by gentle means or by sharp ones1 deliver you ,he will1 and set your feet on firm ground1 and order your goings1 that you may run with patience the race which is set before you along the road of life and the pathway of ,god's commandments wherein there is no death4 ,good ,news of ,god1 ,sermons4 ,what are we to do when our sins bring us1 as they certainly will some day bring us1 into trouble1 but to open our eyes and see that the only thing for men and women whom ,god has made is to obey ,him8 ,how can we prosper by doing anything else8 ,it is ill fighting against ,god4 ,but some one may say1 ,i know ,i have sinned1 and ,i do wish and long to obey ,god1 but ,i am so weak1 and my sins have so entangled me1 that ,i cannot obey ,god4 ,i long to do so4 ,i feel and know1 when ,i look back1 that all my sin and shame and unhappiness come from being proud and self-willed and determined to have my own way4 ,but ,i cannot mend4 ,do not despair1 poor soul6 ,i had a thousand times sooner hear you say that you cannot mend than that you can4 ,for those who really feel they cannot mend--those who are really weary and worn out with the burden of their sins--those who are tired out with their own wilfulness1 and feel ready to lie down and die1 like a spent horse1 and say1 ,god take me away1 no matter to what place2 ,i am not fit to live here on earth1 a shame and a torment to myself day and night--those who are in that state of mind are very near--very near--finding out glorious news4 ,god knows as well as you what you have to struggle against2 ay1 a thousand times better4 ,he knows--,what does ,he not know8 ,therefore pray to ,him4 ,cry to ,him to make your will like ,his own will1 that you may love what ,he loves1 hate what ,he hates1 and do what ,he wishes you to do2 and you will surely find it come true that those who try to mend1 and yet know that they cannot mend themselves1 ,god will mend them4 ,national ,sermons4 ,sin1 ,greek text1 is literally1 as it signifies1 the missing of a mark2 and that each miss brings a penalty1 or rather is itself the penalty1 is to me the best of news1 and gives me hope for myself and for every human being1 past1 present1 and future1 for it makes me look on them all as children under a paternal education1 who are being taught to become aware of1 and use their own powers in ,god's house1 the universe1 and for ,god's work in it2 and in proportion as they learn to do that1 they attain salvation1 ,greek text1 literally health and wholeness of spirit1 which is1 like the health of the body1 its own reward4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,if in sorrow the thought strikes you that you are punished for your sins1 mourn for them1 but not for the happiness they have prevented4 ,rather thank ,god that ,he has stopped you in time1 and remember ,his promises of restoring us if we profit by ,his chastisement4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,ah6 how many a poor1 foolish creature1 in misery and shame1 with guilty conscience and sad heart1 tries to forget his sin1 to forget his sorrow2 but he cannot4 ,he is sick and tired of sin4 ,he is miserable1 and he hardly knows why4 ,there is a longing1 and craving1 and hunger at his heart after something better4 ,then he begins to remember his ,heavenly ,father's house4 ,old words1 which he learnt in childhood2 good old words out of his ,catechism and ,bible1 start up strangely in his mind4 ,he had forgotten them1 laughed at them perhaps in his wild days4 ,but now they come up1 he does not know where from1 like beautiful ghosts gliding in4 ,and he is ashamed of them4 ,they reproach him1 the dear old lessons2 and at last he says1 ,would ,god that ,i were a little child again2 once more an innocent little child at my mother's knee6 ,perhaps ,i have been a fool2 and the old ,sunday books were right after all4 ,at least1 ,i am miserable6 ,i thought ,i was my own master1 but perhaps ,he about whom ,i used to read in the old ,sunday books is my ,master after all4 ,at least1 ,i am not my own master2 ,i am a slave4 ,perhaps ,i have been fighting against ,him1 against the ,lord ,god1 all this time1 and now ,he has shown me that ,he is the stronger of the two4 ,and when the ,lord has drawn a man thus far1 does ,he stop8 ,not so4 ,he does not leave ,his work half done4 ,if the work is half done1 it is that we stop1 not that ,he stops4 ,whoever comes to ,him1 however confusedly1 or clumsily1 or even lazily they may come1 ,he will in no wise cast out4 ,he may afflict them still more to cure that confusion and laziness2 but ,he is a physician who never sends a patient away1 or keeps him waiting for a single hour4 ,national ,sermons4 ,the blessed ,st4 ,augustine found he could never conquer his own sins by arguing with himself1 or by any other means1 till he got to know ,god1 and to see that ,god was the ,lord4 ,and when his spirit was utterly broken1 when he saw himself to have been a fool and blind all along--then the old words which he learned at his mother's knee came up to his mind1 and he knew that ,god had been watching1 guiding him1 letting him go wrong only to show him the folly of going wrong1 caring for him1 bearing with him1 pleading with his conscience1 alluring him back to the only true happiness1 as a loving father will a rebellious and self-willed child2 and he became a changed man4 ,to that blessed state may ,god of ,his great mercy bring us in ,his own good time4 ,and if ,he does bring us to it1 it is little matter whether ,he brings us to it through joy or through sorrow1 through honour or through shame1 through the ,garden of ,eden or through the ,valley of the ,shadow of ,death4 ,for what matter how bitter the medicine is if it does but save our lives8 ,national ,sermons4 4 4 4 ,your sense of sin is not fanaticism2 it is1 ,i suppose1 simple consciousness of fact4 ,as for helping you to ,christ1 ,i do not believe ,i can one inch4 ,i can see no hope but in prayer1 in going to ,him yourself1 and saying3 ,lord1 if ,thou art there1 if ,thou art at all1 if this be not all a lie1 fulfil ,thy reputed promises1 and give me peace and the sense of forgiveness1 and the feeling that1 bad as ,i may be1 ,thou lovest me still1 seeing all1 understanding all1 and therefore making allowance for all6 ,i have had to do that in past days2 to challenge ,him through outer darkness and the silence of night1 till ,i almost expected that ,he would vindicate ,his own honour by appearing visibly1 as ,he did to ,st4 ,paul and ,st4 ,john2 but ,he answered in the still1 small voice only2 yet that was enough4 ,letters and ,memories4 4 4 4 ,dear friend1 the secret of life for you and for me is to lay our purposes and our characters continually before ,him who made them1 and cry1 ,do ,thou purge me1 and so alone shall ,i be clean4 ,thou requirest truth in the inward parts4 ,thou wilt make me to understand wisdom secretly4 ,what more rational belief8 ,for surely if there be any ,god1 and ,he made us at first1 ,he who makes can also mend ,his own work if it gets out of gear4 ,what more miraculous in the doctrines of regeneration and renewal than in the mere fact of creation8 ,letters and ,memories4 ,as for the sins of youth1 what says the #acjth ,psalm8 ,if ,thou1 ,lord1 were extreme to mark what is done amiss1 who could abide it8 ,but there is mercy with ,him1 therefore shall ,he be feared4 ,and how to fear ,god ,i know not better than by working on at the special work which ,he has given us1 trusting to ,him to make it of use to ,his creatures1 if ,he needs us4 ,therefore fret not nor be of doubtful mind1 but just do the duty which lies nearest4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,yes2 this is our comfort1 this is our hope2 ,christ1 the ,great ,healer1 the ,great ,physician1 can deliver us1 and will deliver us from the remains of our old sins1 the consequences of our own follies4 ,not1 indeed1 at once or by miracles1 but by slow education4 ,better1 indeed1 for us perhaps that ,he should not cure us at once1 lest we should fancy that sin was a light thing which we could throw off whenever we chose2 and not that it is an inward disease1 corroding and corrupting1 the wages whereof are death4 ,and so it is that because ,christ loves us ,he hates our sins1 and cannot abide or endure them1 but will punish them1 and is merciful and loving in punishing as long as a tincture or remnant of sin is left in us4 ,therefore let us put ourselves into the hands of ,christ1 the ,great ,physician1 and ask ,him to heal our wounded souls1 and purge our corrupted souls1 and leave to ,him the choice of how ,he will do it4 ,let us be content to be punished and chastised4 ,let ,him deal with us1 if ,he sees fit1 as ,he dealt with ,david of old1 when ,he forgave the sin1 and yet punished it by the death of his child4 ,let ,him do what ,he will by us1 provided ,he does--what ,he will do--make us good men4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,my belief is that ,god will punish 7has ,he not punished already somewhat87 every wrong thing ,i ever did unless ,i repent--that is1 change my behaviour therein2 and that ,his lightest blow is hard enough to break bone and marrow4 ,but as for saying of any human being whom ,i ever saw on earth that there is no hope for them2 that if ever1 under the bitter smart of just punishment1 they opened their eyes to their folly and altered their mind1 even then ,god would not forgive them2 as for saying that1 ,i will not for all the world and the rulers thereof4 ,i never saw a man in whom there was not some good1 and ,i believe that ,god sees that good far more clearly1 and loves it far more deeply1 than ,i can1 because ,he ,himself put it there1 and therefore it is reasonable to believe that ,he will educate and strengthen that good1 and chastise the holder of it till he obeys it1 and loves it1 and gives himself up to it2 and that the said holder will find such chastisement terrible enough if he is unruly and stubborn ,i doubt not1 and so much the better for him4 ,beyond this ,i cannot say4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,if a man really believed himself to be a son1 under a father's education1 he would believe everything which happened to be a part of that education4 ,and such a man1 ,i believe1 so praying and so working1 keeping before him as his lode-star--,our ,father1 hallowed be ,thy name2 ,thy kingdom come2 ,thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven2 and asking even for his daily bread for that purpose and no other1 would find selfishness and self-seeking die out of him1 and active benevolence grow up in him4 ,he would find past sorrows and falls turned unexpectedly to practical use for his own and other's good2 and discover to his delight1 that his ,father had been educating him1 while he fancied he was educating himself2 and he would neither have leisure nor need to torment himself about the motives of his actions1 but simply whatever his hand found to do1 do it with all his might4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,let us forward4 ,god leads us2 though blind1 shall we be afraid to follow8 ,i do not see my way2 ,i do not care to2 but ,i know that ,he sees ,his way1 and that ,i see ,him1 and ,i cannot believe that in spite of all one's sins ,he will forget ,his gracious promises4 ,they had an eye unto ,him1 and were lightened4 ,they that put their trust in ,him shall not be ashamed4 ,i know the miserable1 peevish1 lazy1 conceited1 faithless1 prayerless wretch that ,i am1 but ,i know this too1 that ,one is guiding me1 and driving me when ,i would not be guided1 who will make me1 and has made me1 go ,his way1 and do ,his work1 by fair means or by foul4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,be of good cheer4 ,,when the wicked man turneth from his wickedness 7then1 there and then7 he shall save his soul alive--and all his sin and wickedness shall not be mentioned unto him4 ,what your measure of guilt 7if there can be a measure of the incommensurable spiritual7 may be1 ,i know not4 ,but this ,i know that as long as you keep the sense of guilt alive in your own mind you will remain justified in ,god's mind2 as long as you set your sins before your face ,he will set them behind ,his back4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,this is the ,gospel1 the good news for fallen men1 that there is a ,man in the midst of the throne of ,god to whom all power is given in heaven and earth2 that the fate of the world and all that is therein1 the fate of sun and stars1 the fate of kings and nations1 the fate of every publican and harlot1 heathen and outcast1 the fate of all who are in death and hell1 depend alike upon the sacred heart of ,jesus2 the heart which grieved at the tomb of ,lazarus1 ,his friend2 the heart which wept over ,jerusalem2 the heart which said to the blessed ,magdalene1 the woman that was a sinner1 ,go in peace1 thy sins are forgiven thee2 the heart that yearns over every sinful and wandering soul all over the earth of ,god1 crying to all1 ,why will ye die8 ,have ,i any pleasure in the death of him that dieth1 saith the ,lord1 and not rather that he should turn from his wickedness and live8 ,come unto me all ye that are weary and heavy laden and ,i will give you rest4 ,national ,sermons4 ,this is the message of the blessed sacrament of the body and blood of ,christ1 which tells you that in spite of all your daily sins and failings1 you can still look up to ,god as your ,father2 to the ,lord ,jesus as your life2 to the ,holy ,spirit as your guide and your inspirer2 that though you be a prodigal son1 your ,father's house is still open to you2 your ,father's eternal love ready to meet you afar off the moment that you cry from your heart--,father1 ,i have sinned1 and am no more worthy to be called ,thy child2 and that you must be converted and turn back to ,god your ,father not merely once for all1 but weekly1 daily1 hourly1 as often as you forget and disobey ,him4 ,this is the message of the blessed sacrament--that though you cannot come to it trusting in your own righteousness1 you can come trusting in ,his manifold and great mercies2 that though you are not worthy to gather up the crumbs under ,his table1 yet ,he is the same ,lord whose property is ever to have mercy1 and ,he will grant that your souls shall be washed in ,christ's most precious blood1 that you may dwell in ,him1 and ,he in you1 for ever4 ,national ,sermons4 ,members of ,christ1 children of ,god1 heirs of the kingdom of heaven1 heirs of a ,hope undying1 pure1 that will never fade away1 you have a right given you by the promise and oath of ,almighty ,god ,himself1 to hope for yourselves1 for your neighbours1 for this poor distracted world for ever and ever3 a right to believe that there is an everlasting day of justice1 and peace1 and happiness in store for the whole world1 and that you1 if you will1 may have your share in that glorious sunrise which shall never set again4 ,go to the ,scriptures1 and there read the promises of ,god1 the grounds of your just hope1 for all heaven and earth4 ,behold the ,lamb of ,god1 who takes away the sin of the world4 ,how dare we1 who call ourselves ,christians1 who have been baptized into ,his name1 who have tasted of ,his mercy1 who have the might of ,his love1 the converting and renewing power of ,his ,spirit--how dare we doubt that ,he will take away the sins of the world8 ,ay1 step by step1 nation by nation1 year by year1 the ,lord shall conquer2 for ,he must reign till ,he has put all enemies under ,his feet4 4 4 4 ,he has promised to take away the sins of the world1 and ,he is ,god1 and cannot lie4 ,national ,sermons4 ,,iii4 ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep ,,of ,,fear ,,and ,,anxiety4 ,my heart is disquieted within me4 ,tearfulness and trembling are come upon me1 and an horrible dread hath overwhelmed me4--,ps4 lv4 #d4 ,thou hast proved and visited my heart in the night season--,ps4 xvii4 #c4 ,nevertheless though ,i am sometimes afraid1 yet put ,i my trust in ,thee4--,ps4 lv4 #c4 ,the ,lord is my light and my salvation2 whom shall ,i fear8 ,the ,lord is the strength of my life2 of whom shall ,i be afraid8--,ps4 xxvii4 #a4 ,i sought the ,lord and ,he heard me and delivered me from all my fear4--,ps4 xxxiv4 #d4 ,who is there who has not at times said to himself--,god is so holy1 so pure and glorious2 while ,i am so unjust1 and unclean1 and mean6 and ,god is so great and powerful2 while ,i am so small and weak6 ,what shall ,i do8 ,does not ,god hate and despise me8 ,will ,he not take from me all ,i love best8 ,will ,he not hurl me into endless torment when ,i die8 ,how can ,i escape from ,him8 ,wretched man that ,i am1 ,i cannot escape from ,him6 ,how then can ,i turn away ,his hate8 ,how can ,i make ,him change ,his mind8 ,how can ,i soothe and appease ,him8 ,what shall ,i do to escape ,him8 ,did you ever have such thoughts8 ,and did you ever find those thoughts1 that slavish terror of ,god's wrath1 that dread of hell make you better men8 ,i never did4 ,unless you go beyond them--as far beyond them as heaven is beyond hell1 as far above them as a free son is above a miserable crouching slave1 they will do you more harm than good4 ,this spirit of bondage1 this slavish terror1 instead of bringing us nearer to ,god1 only drives us farther from ,him4 ,it does not make us hate what is wrong1 it only makes us dread the punishment of it4 ,how then shall we escape the terror and misery of an evil conscience1 and rise out of our sins8 ,believe the warrant of your baptism4 ,your baptism says to you--,god is your ,father1 ,he does not hate you though you be the greatest sinner on earth4 ,he loves you1 for you are ,his child1 and ,he willeth not the death of a sinner1 but that all should come and be saved4 ,he hateth nothing that ,he has made4 ,this is the message of your baptism--that you are ,god's child1 and that ,god's will and wish is that you should grow up to become ,his son1 to serve ,him lovingly1 trustingly1 manfully2 and that ,he can and will give you the power to do so2 ay1 ,he has given you the power already1 if you will but claim and use it4 ,but you must claim and use it1 because you are meant not merely to be ,god's wilful1 ignorant1 selfish child1 obeying ,him from fear of the rod1 but to be ,his willing1 loving1 loyal son4 ,national ,sermons4 ,god is not a tyrant who must be appeased with gifts1 or a task-master who must be satisfied with the labour of his slaves4 ,he is a ,father1 who loves ,his children1 who gives and loveth to give1 who gives to all freely1 and upbraideth not4 ,he truly willeth not the death of a sinner1 but rather that he should turn from his wickedness and live4 ,his will is a good will1 and howsoever much men's sin and folly may resist it1 and seem for a time to mar it1 yet ,he is too great and good to owe any man1 even the worst1 the smallest spite or grudge4 ,patiently1 nobly1 magnanimously1 ,god waits--waits for the man who is a fool1 to find out his folly2 waits for the heart which has tried to find pleasure in everything else1 to find out that everything else disappoints1 and to come back to ,him1 that fountain of all wholesome pleasure1 that well-spring of all life fit for a man to live4 ,when the fool finds out his folly2 when the wilful man gives up his wilfulness2 when the rebel submits himself to law2 when the son comes back to his father's house--there is no sternness1 no upbraiding1 no revenge2 but the everlasting and boundless love of ,god wells forth again as ever4 ,the ,creator has condescended to wait for ,his creature1 because what ,he wanted was not ,his creature's fear1 but ,his creature's love2 not his lip-obedience1 but his heart2 because ,he wanted him not to come back as a trembling slave to his master1 but as a son who has found out at last what a father he has left him1 when all beside has played him false4 ,let him come back thus1 to find all is forgiven2 and to hear the ,father say1 ,this my son was dead and is alive again2 he was lost and is found4 ,discipline and other ,sermons4 ,when the tempest comes2 when affliction1 fear1 anxiety1 shame come1 then the ,cross of ,christ begins to mean something to us4 ,for then in our misery and confusion we look up to heaven and ask1 ,is there any ,one in heaven who understands all this8 ,does ,god understand my trouble8 ,does ,god feel for my trouble8 ,does ,god care for my trouble8 ,does ,god know what trouble means8 ,or must ,i fight the battle of life alone1 without sympathy or help from ,god1 who made me and has put me here8 ,then1 does the ,cross of ,christ bring a message to our heart such as no other thing or being on earth can bring4 ,for it says to us1 ,god does understand thee utterly2 for ,christ understands thee4 ,christ feels for thee2 ,christ feels with thee2 ,christ has suffered for thee1 and suffered with thee4 ,thou canst go through nothing which ,christ has not gone through4 ,he1 the ,son of ,god1 endured poverty1 fear1 shame1 agony1 death for thee1 that ,he might be touched with the feeling of thine infirmity and help thee to endure1 and bring thee safe through all to victory and peace4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,though we1 happily1 no longer believe in the terror by night1 which of old was thought to come from witches1 ghosts1 demons1 yet there is a terror by night in which we must believe1 for it comes to us from ,god1 and should be listened to as the voice of ,god1 even that terror about our own sinfulness1 folly1 weakness1 which comes to us in dreams and sleepless nights4 ,we may learn from these night fancies and night thoughts2 for they are often ,god's message to us1 calling us to repentance and amendment of life4 ,they are often ,god's ,book of ,judgment1 wherein our sins are written1 which ,god is setting before us1 and showing us the things we have done4 ,god sends dreams to men which enable them to look back1 and recollect things past1 which they had forgot only too easily2 and these humble and penitential dreams are ,god's warning that 7as the ,article says7 the infection of nature doth remain even in those who are regenerate1 and that nothing but the continual help of ,god's ,spirit will keep us from falling back or falling away4 ,discipline and other ,sermons4 ,the religion of terror is the most superficial of all religions4 ,god's arbitrary will and almighty power may seem dark by themselves though deep1 as they do to the ,calvinists1 because they do not involve ,his moral character4 ,join them with the fact that ,he is a ,god of mercy as well as justice1 remember that ,his essence is love1 and the thunder cloud will blaze with dewy gold1 full of soft rain and pure light4 ,all the deep things of ,god are bright1 for ,god is light4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,i am not1 and will not 7please ,god to help me1 as ,he has hitherto7 be anxious about anything4 ,why should we weary out the little life we have left in us1 when ,he has promised to care for us1 and make us renew our youth1 and heap us with everything that is good for us8 ,and as for our difficulties4 ,has it not been fulfilled in them--,as thy day so shall thy strength be8 ,have they not been ,god's sending8 ,god's way of preventing the cup of bliss being over sweet8 and consider1 have they not been blessed lessons8 ,have we not had in all things with the temptation a way to escape8 ,so out of evil ,god brings good2 or rather out of necessity ,he brings strength4 ,the highest spiritual training is contained in the most paltry physical accidents2 and the meanest actual want may be the means of calling into actual life the possible but sleeping embryo of the very noblest faculties4 ,this is a great mystery2 but we are animals1 in time and space2 and by time and space1 and our animal natures1 are we educated4 ,therefore let us be only patient1 patient2 and let ,god our ,father teach ,his own lesson1 ,his own way4 ,let us try to learn it well1 and learn it quickly2 but do not let us fancy that ,he will ring the school bell1 and send us to play before our lesson is learnt4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,in all the events of life pray1 pray take what ,god does not send as not good for us1 and trust ,him to send us what is good4 ,remember all these things are right1 and come with a reason1 and a purpose1 and a meaning2 and he who grumbles at them believeth not 7for the time being at least7 in the ,living ,god4 ,ah6 do not fancy that ,i am not often perplexed--,cast down1 yet not in despair4 ,no2 ,christ reigns1 as ,luther used to say--and therefore ,i will not fear1 though the mountains be removed 7and ,i with them7 and cast into the midst of the sea4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,all these anxieties will be good for you4 ,they all go to the making of a man--calling out that ,god-dependence in him which is the only true self- dependence1 the only true strength4 ,well said old ,hezekiah1 ,lord1 by all these things men live 7by trouble1 sorrow1 sickness71 and in these things is the life of the spirit4 ,,ms4 ,letters4 ,our ,lord said1 ,take no thought for the morrow2 the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself4 ,sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof4 ,matt4 vi4 #cd4 ,and do we not find that our ,lord's words are true8 ,who are the people who get through most work in their lives1 with the least wear and tear8 ,are they the anxious people8 ,those who imagine to themselves possible misfortunes1 and ask continually1 ,what if this happened1 or if that8 ,how should ,i be able to get through such and such a trouble8 ,far1 far from it4 ,let us not waste the strength which ,god has given us for to-day in vain fears or vain dreams about to-morrow4 ,to- day is quite full enough of anxiety and care4 ,sufficient for the day is the evil thereof1 and sufficient for the day is the good thereof4 ,to-day1 and to-morrow too1 may end very differently from what we hope4 ,yes4 ,but they may end very differently from what we fear4 ,look not too far ahead1 lest you see what is coming before you are ready for the sight4 ,if we foresaw the troubles that are coming1 perhaps it would break our hearts2 and if we foresaw the happiness which is coming1 perhaps it would turn our heads4 ,let us not meddle with the future but refrain our souls and keep them low1 like little children1 content with the day's food1 and the day's schooling1 and the day's play-hours1 sure that the ,divine ,master knows all that is right1 and how to train us1 and whither to lead us1 though we know not1 and need not know1 save this1 that the path by which ,he is leading each of us--if we will but obey and follow1 step by step--leads up to ,everlasting ,life4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,,iv4 ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep ,,of ,,loneliness1 ,,failure1 ,,and ,,disappointment4 ,my heart is smitten down1 and withered like grass4 ,i am even as a sparrow that sitteth alone on the housetop--,ps4 cii4 #d1 #f4 ,my lovers and friends hast ,thou put away from me1 and hid mine acquaintance out of my sight--,ps4 lxxviii4 #ah4 ,i looked on my right hand1 and saw there was no man that would know me4 ,i had no place to flee unto1 and no man cared for my soul4 ,i cried unto ,thee1 ,o ,lord1 and said1 ,thou art my ,hope4 ,when my spirit was in heaviness1 then ,thou knewest my path4--,ps4 cxlii4 #d1 #e4 ,gracious is the ,lord1 and righteous1 yea1 our ,god is merciful4 ,i was in misery1 and ,he helped me4--,ps4 cxvi4 #e1 #f4 ,it is sorrow--sorrow and failure--which forces men to believe that there is ,one who heareth prayer1 forces them to lift up their eyes to ,one from whom cometh their help4 ,before the terrible realities of danger1 death1 disappointment1 shame1 ruin--and most of all before deserved shame1 deserved ruin--all arguments melt away2 and the man or woman1 who was but too ready a day before to say1 ,tush1 ,god will never see and will never hear1 begins to hope passionately that ,god does see1 that ,god does hear4 ,in the hour of darkness1 when there is no comfort nor help in man1 when he has no place to flee unto1 and no man careth for his soul1 then the most awful1 if most blessed of all questions is1 ,but is there no ,one higher than man to whom ,i can flee8 ,no ,one higher than man who cares for my soul1 and for the souls of those who are dearer to me than my own soul8 ,no friend8 ,no helper8 ,no deliverer8 ,no counsellor8 ,even no judge8 ,no punisher8 ,no ,god1 even though ,he be a consuming fire8 ,am ,i in my misery alone in the universe8 ,is my misery without any meaning and without hope8 ,if there be no ,god1 then all that is left for me is despair and death4 ,but if there be1 then ,i can hope that there is a meaning in my misery2 that it comes to me not without cause1 even though that cause be my own fault4 ,then ,i can plead with ,god1 even though in wild words like ,job2 and ask1 ,what is the meaning of this sorrow8 ,what have ,i done8 ,what should ,i do8 ,i will say unto ,god1 ,do not condemn me2 show me wherefore ,thou contendest with me4 ,surely ,i would speak unto the ,almighty2 ,i desire to reason with ,god4 ,oh1 my friends1 a man1 ,i believe1 can gain courage and wisdom to say that only by the inspiration of the ,spirit of ,god4 ,but when once he has said that from his heart1 he begins to be justified by faith2 for he has had faith in ,god4 ,he has trusted ,god--and more--he has justified ,god4 ,he has confessed that ,god is not a mere force or law of ,nature2 nor a mere tyrant and tormentor2 but a ,reasonable ,being who will hear reason1 and a ,just ,being who will do justice by the creatures ,he has made4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,the deeper1 the bitterer your loneliness1 the more you are like ,him who cried upon the cross1 ,my ,god1 my ,god1 why hast ,thou forsaken me8 ,he knows what that grief1 too1 is like4 ,he feels for thee at least4 ,though all forsake thee1 ,he is with thee still1 and if ,he be with thee1 what matter who has left thee for a while8 ,ay1 blessed are those that weep now1 for whom the ,lord loveth1 ,he chasteneth2 and because ,he loves the poor1 ,he brings them low4 ,all things are blessed now but sin2 for all things excepting sin are redeemed by the life and death of the ,son of ,god4 ,blessed are wisdom and courage1 joy and health1 and beauty and love and marriage1 childhood and manhood1 corn and wine1 fruits and flowers2 for ,christ redeemed them by ,his life4 ,and blessed1 too1 are tears and shame1 blessed are weakness and ugliness1 blessed are agony and sickness1 blessed the sad remembrance of our sins1 and a broken heart and a repentant spirit4 ,blessed is death1 and blest the unknown realms1 where souls await the resurrection day1 for ,christ redeemed them by ,his death4 ,blessed are all things1 weak as well as strong4 ,blessed are all days1 dark as well as bright1 for all are ,his1 and ,he is ours2 and all are ours1 and we are ,his for ever4 ,therefore sigh on1 ye sad ones1 and rejoice in your own sadness2 ache on1 ye suffering ones1 and rejoice in your own sorrows4 ,rejoice that you are made free of the holy brotherhood of mourners2 rejoice that you are counted worthy of a fellowship in the sufferings of the ,son of ,god4 ,rejoice and trust on1 for after sorrow shall come joy4 ,trust on2 for in man's weakness ,god's strength shall be made perfect4 ,trust on2 for death is the gate of life4 ,endure on to the end1 and possess your souls in patience for a little while1 and that1 perhaps1 a very little while4 ,death comes swiftly1 and more swiftly still perhaps1 the day of the ,lord4 ,the deeper the sorrow1 the nearer the salvation3-- ,the night is darkest before the dawn2 ,when the pain is sorest1 the child is born2 ,and the day of the ,lord at hand4 ,national ,sermons4 ,thou who art weary and heavy laden2 thou who fanciest at moments that the ,lord's arm is shortened that it cannot save1 and art ready to cry1 ,god hath forgotten me1 take comfort1 and look upon ,christ4 ,thou wilt never be sure of the love of ,god1 unless thou rememberest that it is the same as the love of ,christ2 and by looking at ,christ1 learnest to know thy ,father and ,his ,father1 whose likeness and image ,he is1 and see that the ,spirit which proceeds alike from both of them is the ,spirit of humanity and love1 which cannot help going forth to seek and to save thee1 simply because thou art lost4 ,look1 ,i say1 unto ,christ2 and be sure that what the good ,samaritan did to the wounded traveller1 that same will ,he do to thee1 because ,he is the ,son of ,man1 human and humane4 ,art thou robbed1 wounded1 deserted1 left to die1 worsted in the battle of life1 and fallen in its rugged road1 with no counsel1 no strength1 no hope1 no purpose left8 ,then remember that there is ,one walking to and fro in this world unseen1 but ever present1 whose form is as the form of the ,son of ,man4 ,and ,he has time1 as ,he has will1 to turn aside and minister to such as thee6 ,no human being so mean1 no human sorrow so petty1 but that ,he has the time and the will and the power to have mercy on it1 because ,he is the ,son of ,man4 ,therefore ,he will turn aside even to thee1 whoever thou art1 who art weary and heavy laden1 and can find no rest for thy soul1 at the very moment1 and in the very manner which is best for thee4 ,when thou hast suffered long enough1 ,he will stablish1 strengthen1 settle thee4 ,he will bind up thy wounds1 and pour in the oil and the wine of ,his ,spirit--the ,holy ,ghost1 the ,comforter--and will carry thee to ,his own inn1 whereof it is written1 ,he will hide thee secretly in ,his own presence from the provoking of men2 ,he will keep thee in ,his tabernacle from the strife of tongues4 ,he will give ,his angels charge over thee to keep thee in all thy ways2 and ,he will give thee rest at last in the bosom of the ,father1 from which thou1 like all human souls1 camest forth at first1 and to which thou shalt at last return1 with all human souls who have in them the ,spirit of ,god and of ,christ1 and of eternal life4 ,discipline and other ,sermons4 ,we all like comfort4 ,but what kind of comfort do we not merely like1 but need8 ,merely to be comfortable8 ,to be free from fear1 anxiety1 sorrow8 ,the comfort which poor human beings want in such a world as this is not the comfort of ease1 but the comfort of strength4 ,the comforter whom we need is not one who will merely say kind things1 but give help--help to the weary1 lonely1 heavy-laden heart which has no time to rest4 ,we need not the sunny and smiling face1 but the strong helping arm4 ,for we may be in that state that smiles are shocking to us1 and mere kindness--though we may be grateful for it--of no more comfort to us than sweet music to a drowning man4 ,we may be miserable1 and unable to help being miserable1 and unwilling to help it too4 ,we do not wish to flee from our sorrow3 we do not wish to forget it4 ,we dare not4 ,it is so awful1 so heart-rending1 so plain-spoken1 that ,god1 the master and tutor of our hearts1 must wish us to face it and endure it4 ,our ,father has given us the cup--shall we not drink it8 ,oh6 for a comforter who will help us to drink the bitter cup--who will give us faith to say1 with ,job1 ,though ,he slay me1 yet will ,i trust in ,him--who will give us the firm reason to look steadily at our grief1 and learn the lesson it is meant to teach--who will give us the temperate will to keep sober and calm amid the shocks and changes of mortal life6 ,if we had such a comforter as that1 we should not care if he seemed at times stern1 as well as kind2 we could endure rebuke from him if we could only get from him wisdom to understand the rebuke1 and courage to bear the chastisement4 ,where is that comforter8 ,god answers3 ,that ,comforter am ,i1 the ,god of ,heaven and ,earth4 ,there are comforters on earth who can help thee with wise words and noble counsels1 can be strong as man and tender as woman4 ,but ,god can be more strong than man1 more tender than woman likewise2 and when the strong arm of man supports thee no longer1 yet under thee are the ,everlasting ,arms4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 4 4 4 ,you are disappointed4 ,do remember if you lose heart about your work1 that none of it is lost4 ,that the good of every good deed remains1 and breeds1 and works on for ever2 and that all that fails and is lost is the outside shell of the thing1 which perhaps might have been better done1 but better or worse has nothing to do with the real spiritual good which you have done to men's hearts1 for which ,god will surely repay you in ,his own way and time4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,don't be downhearted if outward humiliation1 disappointment1 failure1 come at first4 ,if ,god be indeed our ,father in any real sense1 then whom ,he loveth ,he chasteneth1 even as a father the son in whom he delighteth4 ,and till thou art emptied of thyself1 ,god cannot fill thee1 though it be a law of the old ,mystics1 is true and practical common sense4 ,go thy way1 though the way to true light is a long ladder4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,as for any schemes of mine1 it is a slight matter whether they have failed or not4 ,but the failure of a hundred schemes would not alter my conviction that they are attempts in a right direction2 and ,i will die in hope1 not having received the promises1 but beholding them afar off1 and confessing myself a stranger and a pilgrim4 ,so ,i am content to have failed4 ,i have learnt in the experiment priceless truths concerning myself1 my fellow-men1 and the ,city of ,god1 which is eternal in the heavens1 for ever coming down among men1 and actualizing itself more and more in every succeeding age4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,we have hope in ,christ for the next life as well as for this--hope that in the next life ,he will give us power to succeed where we failed here2 that ,he will enable us to be good and to do good1 and1 if not to make others good 7for there we trust all will be good together71 to enjoy the fulness of that pleasure for which we have been longing on earth--the pleasure of seeing others good1 as ,christ is good and perfect1 as their ,father in ,heaven is perfect4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,there are many who have in them1 by grace of ,god1 the divine thirst for the higher life2 who are discontented with themselves1 ashamed of themselves2 who are tormented by longings which they cannot satisfy1 instincts which they cannot analyse1 powers which they cannot employ1 duties which they cannot perform1 doctrinal confusions which they cannot unravel2 who would welcome any change1 even the most tremendous1 which would make them nobler1 purer1 juster1 more loving1 more useful1 more clear-hearted and sound-minded2 and1 when they think of death1 say with the poet-- ',tis life1 not death1 for which ,i pant1 ',tis life whereof my nerves are scant1 ,more life1 and fuller1 that ,i want4 ,to them we can say1 for ,god has said it long ago--,be of good cheer4 ,the calling and gifts of ,god are without repentance4 ,if you have the divine thirst1 it will be surely satisfied4 ,if you long to be better men and women1 you will surely be so4 ,only be true to those higher instincts2 only do not learn to despise and quench that divine thirst2 only struggle on1 in spite of mistakes1 of failures1 even of sins1 for every one of which last your ,heavenly ,father will chastise you1 even while ,he forgives2 in spite of all disappointment struggle on4 ,blessed are you who hunger and thirst after righteousness1 for you shall be filled4 ,to you1 and not in vain1 ,the ,spirit and the ,bride say1 ,come4 ,and let him that is athirst1 ,come4 ,and whosoever will1 let him drink of the water of life freely4 ,water of ,life--,sermons4 ,the heart and soul of man wants more than a religion1 as it is written1 ,my soul is athirst for ,god1 even the ,living ,god4 ,they want a living ,god1 who cares for men1 forgives men1 saves men from their sins2 and ,him ,i have found in the ,bible1 and nowhere else1 save in the facts of life1 which the ,bible alone interprets4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,what was ,christ's life8 ,not one of deep speculation1 quiet thoughts1 and bright visions2 but a life of fighting against evil2 earnest1 awful prayers and struggles within1 continual labour of body and mind without2 insult and danger and confusion and violent exertion and bitter sorrow4 ,this was ,christ's life--this is the life of almost every good and great man ,i ever heard of4 ,this was ,christ's cup1 which ,his disciples were to drink of as well as ,he2 this was the baptism of fire with which they were to be baptised of as well as ,he2 this was to be their fight of faith2 this was the tribulation through which they1 and all other great saints1 were to enter into the kingdom of heaven4 ,for it is certain that the harder a man fights against evil the harder evil will fight against him in return2 but it is certain too that the harder a man fights against evil1 the more is he like his ,saviour ,christ1 and the more glorious will be his reward in heaven4 ,village ,sermons4 ,v4 ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep ,,of ,,doubt1 ,,darkness1 ,,and ,,hell4 ,o ,lord ,god of my salvation1 ,i have cried day and night unto ,thee4 ,oh6 let my prayer enter into ,thy presence4 ,for my soul is full of trouble and my life draweth nigh unto ,hell4 ,thou hast laid me in the lowest pit1 in a place of darkness1 and in the deep4--,ps4 lxxxviii4 #a1 #b4 ,if ,i go down to ,hell1 ,thou art there also4 ,yea1 the darkness is no darkness with ,thee2 but the night is as clear as the day4--,ps4 cxxxix4 #g1 #aa4 ,i waited patiently for the ,lord2 and ,he inclined unto me1 and heard my calling4 ,he brought me also out of the horrible pit1 out of the miry clay1 and set my feet upon the rock4 ,and ,he hath put a new song into my mouth1 even a thanksgiving unto our ,god4--,ps4 xl4 #b1 #c4 ,god hath delivered my soul from the place of ,hell4 ,he shall receive me4--,ps4 xlix4 #ae4 ,it is sometimes true1 that sunshine comes after storm4 ,sometimes true--or who could live8--but not always4 ,equally true that in most human lives there are periods of trouble1 blow following blow1 wave following wave1 from opposite and unexpected quarters1 till all ,god's billows have gone over the soul4 ,how paltry and helpless in such dark times are all proud attempts to hang self-poised in the centre of the abyss1 and there organise for oneself a character by means of circumstances4 ,easy enough it seems for a man to educate himself without ,god while he lies comfortably in idleness on a sofa4 ,but what if he found himself hurled perforce among the real universal experiences of humanity2 and made free in spite of himself1 by doubt and fear and horror of great darkness1 of the brotherhood of woe1 common alike to the simplest peasant woman1 and to every great soul1 who has left his impress upon the hearts of after generations8 ,jew1 ,heathen1 or ,christian2 men of the most opposite creeds and aims--whether it be ,moses or ,socrates1 ,isaiah or ,epictetus1 ,augustine or ,mohammed1 ,dante or ,bernard1 ,shakespeare or ,bacon--each and all of them have this one fact in common--that once in their lives1 at least1 they have gone down into the bottomless pit1 and there out of the utter darkness have asked the question of all questions--,is there a ,god8 and if there be1 what is ,he doing with me8 ,what refuge then--when a man feels himself powerless in the gripe of some unseen and inevitable power1 and knows not whether it be chance or necessity1 or a devouring fiend--to wrap himself sternly in himself and cry1 ,i will endure though all the universe be against me8 ,how fine it sounds6 ,but who has done it8 ,no1 there is but one escape1 one chink through which we may see light1 one rock on which our feet may find standing-place1 even in the abyss2 and that is the belief1 intuitive1 inspired1 due neither to reasoning nor to study1 that the billows are ,god's billows2 and that though we go down into ,hell1 ,he is there also2 the belief that not we1 but ,he1 is educating us2 that these seemingly incoherent miseries1 storm following earthquake1 and earthquake fire1 as if the caprice of all the demons were let loose against us1 have in ,his mind a spiritual coherence1 an organic unity and purpose1 though we see it not2 that these sorrows do not come singly1 only because ,he is making short work with our spirits2 and because the more effect ,he sees produced by one blow1 the more swiftly ,he follows it up by another2 till in one great and varied crisis1 seemingly long to us1 but short compared with immortality1 our spirits may be-- ,heated hot with burning fears1 ,and bathed in baths of hissing tears1 ,and battered with the strokes of doom1 ,to shape and use4 ,two ,years ,ago4 ,there is no darker temptation than that which comes over a man when the devil whispers to him such thoughts as these1 ,god does not care for me--,god hates me4 ,luck1 and everything else is against me4 ,there seems some curse upon me4 ,why should ,i change8 ,let ,god first change to me and then will ,i change towards ,him4 ,but ,god will not change2 ,he has determined to have no mercy on me4 ,i can see that2 for everything goes wrong with me4 ,then what is the use of my repenting4 ,i will go my own way--and what must be must4 ,have you ever had such thoughts8 ,then hear the word of the ,lord to you3 ,when1 whensoever1 wheresoever1 the wicked man turneth away from his wickedness which he has committed1 and doeth that which is lawful and right1 he shall save his soul alive4 ,have ,i any pleasure in the death of him that dieth saith the ,lord1 and not rather that he should be converted and live8 ,never believe the devil when he tells you that ,god hates you4 ,never believe him when he tells you that ,god has been too hard upon you1 and placed you in such circumstances of temptation1 ignorance1 poverty or anything else1 that you cannot mend4 ,what does the promise of your ,baptism say8 ,be you poor1 tempted1 ignorant1 stupid1 be you what you will1 you are ,god's child--your ,father's love is over you1 ,his mercy ready for you4 ,you feel too weak to change4 ,ask ,god's ,spirit to give you a strength of will you never felt before4 ,you feel too proud to change4 ,ask ,god's ,spirit to humble your proud heart1 to soften your hard heart2 and you will find to your surprise that when your pride is gone1 when you are utterly ashamed of yourself1 and see your sins in their true blackness1 and feel unworthy to look up to ,god1 that then will come a nobler1 holier1 manlier feeling--self-respect1 and a clear conscience1 and the thought that1 weak and simple as you are1 you are in the right way2 that ,god and the ,angels of ,god are smiling on you2 that you are in tune again with all earth and heaven1 because you are what ,god wills you to be4 ,not ,his proud1 peevish1 self-willed child1 fancying yourself strong enough to go alone1 when you are really the slave of your own passions and appetites and the playthings of the devil2 but ,his loving1 loyal son through the strength of ,god1 and able to do what you will1 because what you will ,god wills also4 ,national ,sermons4 ,to escape atheism and despair1 let us remember that the ,creator and ,ordainer of the circumstances of life is not chance or ,nature1 but the ,father of our ,lord ,jesus ,christ and of us4 ,when you feel you are in the deepest and gloomiest doubt1 pray the prayer of desperation2 cry out1 ,lord1 if ,thou dost exist1 let me know that ,thou dost exist6 ,guide my mind by a way that ,i know not into ,thy truth1 and ,god will deliver you4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,sad as your letter was1 it gave me pleasure2 for it is always a pleasure to see life springing out of death1 health returning after disease1 though1 as doctors know1 the recovery from asphyxia or drowning is always as painful as the temporary death itself was painless4 ,faith is born of doubt4 ,it is not life1 but death1 where nothing stirs4 ,take all these doubts and struggles of yours as simply so many signs that your ,father in heaven is treating you as a father1 that ,he has not forsaken you1 is not offended with you1 but is teaching you in the way best suited to your own idiosyncracy1 the great lesson of lessons1 ,empty thyself and ,god will fill thee4 ,take your sorrows to your ,father in heaven4 ,if that name ,father mean anything1 it must mean that ,he will not turn away from ,his wandering child in a way that you would he ashamed to turn away from yours4 ,if there be pity1 lasting affection1 patience in man1 they must have come from ,god4 ,they above all things must be ,his likeness4 ,believe that ,he possesses them a million times more fully than any human being4 ,st4 ,paul knew well at least the state of mind in which you are4 ,he said that he had found a panacea for it4 ,and his words1 to judge from the way in which they have taken root and spread and conquered1 must have some depth and life in them4 ,why not try them8 ,just read the first nine chapters of ,st4 ,paul's ,epistle to the ,romans1 taking for granted that they mean the simplest and most obvious sense which can be put upon them4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,when the hour of temptation comes1 go back1 go back if you would escape1 to what you were taught at your mother's knee concerning the grace of ,god2 for that alone will keep you safe1 or angel1 or archangel1 or any created being safe1 in this life1 and in all lives to come4 ,sermons on ,david4 ,what does it all mean8 ,i cry4 ,night and day the heavens have been black to me4 ,you may think it sinful to have such thoughts4 ,my experience is that when they come1 one must do battle with them2 one must face them2 do battle with them deliberately2 be patient if they worst one for a while4 ,by all such things men live2 in these is the life of the spirit4 ,only by going down into hell can one rise the third day4 ,i have been in hell many times in my life1 therefore1 perhaps1 ,i have had some small power of influencing human hearts4 ,but ,i never have looked hell so close in the face as ,i have been doing of late4 ,wherefore1 ,i hope thereby to get fresh power to rise and to lift others heavenward4 ,i can only cry--,o ,lord1 in ,thee have ,i trusted1 let me never be confounded4 ,wherefore should the wicked say--,where is now his ,god8 ,but while ,i fret most there comes to me an inner voice1 saying--,what matter if thou art confounded4 ,god is not4 ,only believe firmly that ,god is as good as thou with thy finite reason canst conceive2 and ,he will make thee at last able to conceive how good ,he is1 and thou shalt have the perfect blessing of seeing ,god4 ,you will say ,i am inconsistent4 ,so ,i am2 and so1 if read honestly1 are ,david's ,psalms4 ,yet1 that very inconsistency is what brings them home to every human heart for ever4 ,the words of a man in real doubt and real darkness1 crying for light1 and not crying in vain1 as ,i trust ,i shall not4 4 4 4 ,i only know that ,i know nothing1 but hope that ,christ1 who is the ,son of ,man1 will tell me piecemeal1 if ,i be patient and watchful1 what ,i am and what man is4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,some things ,i see clearly1 and hold with desperate clutch--a ,father in ,heaven for all2 a ,son of ,god incarnate for all 7that incarnation is the one fact which is to me worth all1 because it makes all others possible and rational1 and without it ,i should go mad72 and a ,spirit of the ,father and the ,son1 the fountain of all good on earth--who works to will and to do of ,his own good pleasure--in whom8 ,in every human being in whom there is one spark of active good1 the least desire to do right1 or to be of use4 ,beyond that ,i see little save that ,right is divine and all-conquering--,wrong utterly infernal1 and yet weak1 foolish1 a mere bullying phantom1 which will flee at each brave blow1 had we courage to strike at it in ,god's name4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,there is not a sorrow which man can taste which ,jesus ,christ has not fulfilled4 ,he filled the cup of misery to the brim1 and drained it to the dregs4 ,he tasted death for every man1 and went down into the lowest depths of terror and shame and agony and death1 and1 worst of all1 into the feeling that ,god had forsaken ,him2 that there was no help or hope for ,him in heaven1 as well as earth2 in a word1 ,he went down into hell2 even into that lowest darkness where1 for one moment1 a man feels1 that ,god is nothing to him1 and he is nothing to ,god4 ,even into that depth ,jesus condescended to go down for us4 ,that worst of all temptations1 of which ,david only tasted a drop1 when he cried out1 ,my ,god1 my ,god1 why hast thou forsaken me8--,jesus drained to the very dregs for us4 ,he went down into hell for us1 and conquered hell and death1 and the darkness of the unknown world1 and rose again glorious from them1 that ,he might teach us not to fear death and hell2 that ,he might know how to comfort us in the hour of death1 and in the day of judgment1 when on our sick-bed1 or in some bitter shame and trouble1 the lying devil is telling us that we are damned and lost1 and forsaken by ,god1 and every sin we ever did rises up and stares us in the face4 ,national ,sermons4 ,whatever may be the mysteries of life and death1 there is one mystery which the ,cross of ,christ reveals to us1 and that is the infinite and absolute goodness of ,god4 ,let all the rest remain a mystery so long as the mystery of the ,cross of ,christ gives us faith for all the rest4 ,faith1 ,i say4 ,the mystery of evil1 of terror1 of death1 the gospel does not pretend to solve1 but it tells us that the mystery is proved to be soluble2 for ,god ,himself has taken upon ,himself the task of solving it2 and ,christ has proved by ,his own act1 that if there be evil in the world1 it is none of ,his1 for ,he hates it1 fights against it1 and ,he fought against it to the death4 ,the ,cross says1 ,have faith in ,god4 ,ask no more of ,him1 ,why hast thou made me thus8 ,ask no more1 ,why do the wicked prosper on the earth8 ,ask no more1 ,whence pain and death1 war and famine1 earthquake and tempest1 and all the ills to which flesh is heir8 ,all fruitless questioning1 all peevish repinings are precluded henceforth by the death and passion of ,christ4 ,dost thou suffer8 ,thou canst not suffer more than the ,son of ,god4 ,dost thou sympathise with thy fellow-sufferers8 ,thou canst not sympathise more than the ,son of ,god4 ,dost thou long to right them1 to deliver them1 even at the price of thine own blood8 ,thou canst not long more ardently than the ,son of ,god1 who carried ,his longing into act1 and died for them and thee4 ,what if the end be not yet8 ,what if evil still endure8 ,what if the medicine have not yet conquered the disease8 ,have patience1 have faith1 have hope1 as thou standest at the foot of ,christ's ,cross1 and holdest fast to it1 as the ,anchor of thy soul and reason1 as well as of thy heart4 ,for however ill the world may go1 or seem to go1 the ,cross is the everlasting token that ,god so loved the world1 that ,he spared not ,his only begotten ,son1 but freely gave ,him for it4 ,whatsoever else is doubtful this at least is sure1 that ,god must conquer1 because ,god is good2 that ,evil must perish1 because ,god hates ,evil1 even to the death4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,how shall the bottomless pit1 if we fall into it1 be a pathway to the everlasting rock8 ,david tells us1 ,out of the deep have ,i cried unto ,thee1 ,o ,god4 ,he cried to ,god--not to himself1 his own learning1 prudence1 talents--to pull him out of that pit4 ,not to doctrines1 books1 church-goings--not to the dearest earthly friend--not to his own experiences1 faith's assurances1 frames and feelings4 ,the matter was too terrible to be plastered over in that way1 or in any way4 ,he was face to face with ,god alone1 and in utter weakness1 in utter nakedness of soul1 he cried to ,god ,himself4 ,there was the lesson4 ,god took away from him all things1 that he might have no one to cry to but to ,god4 ,and it shall be with every soul of man who1 being in the deep1 cries out of the deep to ,god1 as it was with ,moses when he went up alone into the ,mount of ,god1 and fasted forty days and forty nights amid the earthquake and the thunderstorm1 and the rocks which melted before the ,lord4 ,and behold1 when it was past1 he talked face to face with ,god1 as a man talketh with his friend1 and his countenance shone with heavenly light1 when he came down triumphant out of the ,mount of ,god4 ,good ,news of ,god--,sermons4 ,on the torturing cross ,christ prayed for ,his murderers1 ,father1 forgive them1 for they know not what they do4 ,and this is the character many a man may get in the dark deep4 ,to feel for all1 to feel with all2 to rejoice with those who rejoice1 and weep with those who weep1 to understand people's trials and make allowances for their temptations2 to put oneself in their place till we see with their eyes1 and feel with their hearts1 till we judge no man1 and have hope for all2 to be fair and patient and tender with everyone we meet2 to despise no one1 despair of no one1 because ,christ despises none and despairs of none2 to look on every one we meet with love1 almost with pity1 because they too may have been down into the deep of horror1 or may go down into it any day2 to see our own sins in the sins of others1 to feel that we might do what they do1 and feel as they feel at any moment1 did ,god desert us2 to give and forgive1 live and let live1 even as ,christ gives to us and forgives us1 and lives for us and lets us live in spite of all our sins4 ,good ,news of ,god4 ,rejoice that there is a fire of ,god the ,father whose name is ,love1 burning for ever unquenchably1 to destroy out of every man's heart and out of the hearts of all nations1 and of the physical and moral world1 all which offends and makes a lie2 and that into that fire the ,son will surely cast all shams1 lies1 hypocrisies1 tyrannies1 false doctrines4 ,is it not good news that that fire is unquenchable1 that that worm will not die8 ,the fire may be kindled for us--the worm may seize our hearts4 ,god grant that in that day we may have courage to let the fire and the worm do their work--to say to ,christ1 ,these too are ,thine1 and out of ,thine infinite love they have come4 ,thou requirest truth in the inward parts1 and ,i will thank ,thee for any means1 however bitter1 which ,thou usest to make me true4 ,i want to be an honest man and a right man6 ,and1 ,o joy6 ,thou wantest me to be so also4 ,o joy6 that though ,i long cowardly to quench ,thy fire1 ,i cannot do it4 ,purge me therefore1 ,o ,lord1 though it be with fire4 ,burn up the chaff of vanity and self-indulgence1 of hasty prejudices1 second-hand dogmas1--husks which do not feed my soul1 with which ,i cannot be content1 of which ,i feel ashamed daily--and if there be any grains of wheat in me1 any word or thought or power of action which may be of use as seed for my nation after me1 gather it1 ,o ,lord1 into ,thy garner4 ,amen4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,the ,fire of ,god hardens a man and softens him at the same time4 ,he comes out of it hardened to that hardness of which it is written1 ,do thou endure hardness as a good soldier of ,jesus ,christ2 and again1 ,i have fought a good fight1 ,i have kept the faith1 ,i have finished my course2--yet softened to that softness of which it is written1 ,be ye tender-hearted1 compassionate1 forgiving one another1 even as ,god1 for ,christ's sake1 has forgiven you2 and again1 ,we have a ,high ,priest who can be touched with the feeling of our infirmities1 seeing that ,he has been tempted in all things like as we are4 ,happy1 thrice happy1 are they who have thus walked through the ,valley of the ,shadow of ,death1 and found it a path that leads to everlasting life4 ,happy are they who have writhed awhile in the fierce fire of ,god1 and have had burned out of them the chaff1 and the dross1 and all which offends and makes them vain and light1 yet makes them dull1 and drags them down at the same time2 till only the pure gold of ,god's righteousness is left1 seven times tried in the fire1 incorruptible1 precious in the sight of ,god and man4 ,such need not regret1 will not regret1 all that they have gone through4 ,it has made them brave1 sober1 patient4 ,it has given them ,the reason firm1 the temperate will1 ,endurance1 foresight1 strength and skill2 and so shaped them into the likeness of ,christ1 who was made perfect by suffering2 and though ,he were a ,son1 yet in the days of ,his flesh made strong supplication1 and crying with tears to ,his ,father1 and was heard in that ,he feared2 and so1 though ,he died on the ,cross and descended into ,hell1 yet triumphed over ,death and ,hell by dying and descending1 and conquered them by submitting to them4 ,good ,news of ,god--,sermons4 ,,vi4 ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep ,,of ,,death4 ,my heart is disquieted within me1 and the fear of death has fallen upon me4--,ps4 iv4 #d4 ,my flesh and my heart faileth1 but ,god is the strength of my heart4--,ps4 lxiii4 #be4 ,yea though ,i walk through the valley of the shadow of death1 ,i will fear no evil1 for ,thou art with me4--,ps4 xxiii4 #d4 ,thou hast delivered my soul from death1 mine eyes from tears1 and my feet from falling4--,ps4 cxvi4 #h4 ,what will become of us after we die8 ,what will the next world be like8 ,what is heaven like8 ,shall ,i be able to enjoy it8 ,shall ,i be a man there1 or only a ghost1 a spirit without a body8 ,to this ,st4 ,paul answers1 that ,christ1 the ,son of ,god1 after that ,he was manifested in the flesh1 was received up into glory4 ,he does not tell us what heaven is like1 for though he had been caught up into the third heaven1 yet what he saw there was unspeakable4 ,neither does he tell us what the next life will be like2 all he says is1 the ,man ,christ ,jesus1 who walked this earth like other men1 was received up into glory1 and ,he did not leave ,his man's mind1 ,his man's heart1 even ,his man's body behind ,him4 ,he carried up into heaven with ,him ,his whole manhood1 spirit1 soul1 and body1 even to the print of the nails in ,his hands1 and in ,his most holy feet1 and the wound of the spear in ,his most holy side4 ,that is enough for us2 because the ,man ,christ ,jesus is in heaven1 we1 as men1 may ascend to heaven4 ,where ,he is we shall be4 ,and what ,he is1 in as far as ,he is ,man1 we shall be4 ,and this we do know1 that we shall be like ,him1 for we shall see ,him as ,he is4 ,national ,sermons4 ,men are afraid of dying1 principally1 ,i believe1 because they fear the unknown4 ,it is not that they are afraid of the pain of dying4 ,it is not that they are afraid of going to hell4 ,neither is it that they are afraid of not going to heaven4 ,but when they think of actually dying1 they feel as if to go into the next world was to be turned out into the dark night1 into an unknown land1 away from house and home1 and all they have known and loved2 and so they shrink from death4 ,all ,saints-,day ,sermons4 ,when you are in terror1 trouble1 and affliction1 ay6 and in the black jaws of death1 and know not where to turn1 that blessed thought1 ,christ is risen from the dead1 will be a shield and a strength to you which no other thought can give4 ,the ,lord is risen--a man1 with ,his man's body1 and ,his man's spirit1 ,his human love and tenderness2 ,he has taken them all up to ,heaven with ,him4 ,he is a man still1 though ,he is very ,god of very ,god1 ,he rose from the dead as a man1 and therefore ,he can understand me and feel for me still--now--here in ,england in the nineteenth century just as much as ,he could when ,he was walking upon earth in ,judea of old4 ,when this world is vanishing from our eyes1 and we are going we know not whither1 leaving behind us all we know1 and love1 and understand2 then the thought of all thoughts--,christ is risen from the dead is the only one which will save us from sad1 dark thoughts1 from fear and despair1 or from stupid carelessness1 and the death of a brute beast1 such as too many die4 ,christ is risen and ,i shall rise4 ,christ has conquered death for ,himself1 and ,he will conquer it for me4 ,christ took ,his man's body and soul with ,him from the tomb to ,god's right hand1 and ,he will raise my body and soul at the last day1 that ,i may be with ,him for ever1 and see ,him where ,he is4 ,in life and in death this is the only thing which will save us from sin1 from terror1 from the dread of the hereafter4 ,national ,sermons4 ,why did he die1 we ask8 ,there must be a final cause1 a purpose for each death of every son of man1 or the fact would be altogether hideous--a scribble without a meaning--a skeleton without a soul4 ,why did he die8 ,i became dumb1 ,i opened not my mouth2 for it was ,thy doing4 ,so says the ,burial ,psalm4 ,so let us say likewise4 ,i became dumb3 not with rage1 not with despair2 but because it was ,thy doing1 and therefore it was done well4 ,it was the deed1 not of chance1 nor of necessity4 ,not so4 ,for it was the deed of the ,father1 without whom a sparrow falls not to the ground2 of the ,son who died upon the ,cross in the utterness of ,his desire to save2 of the ,holy ,ghost1 who is the ,lord and ,giver of ,life to all created things4 ,it was the deed of ,one who delights in ,life and not in ,death2 in bliss and not in woe2 in light and not in darkness2 in order and not in anarchy2 in good and not in evil4 ,it had a final cause1 a meaning1 a purpose2 and that purpose is very good4 ,what it is1 we know not2 and we need not know4 ,to guess at it would be indeed to meddle with matters too high for us4 ,so let us be dumb4 ,dumb1 not from despair1 but from faith2 dumb1 not like a wretch weary with calling for help which does not come1 but dumb like a child sitting at its mother's feet1 and looking up into her face and watching her doings1 understanding none of them as yet1 but certain that they are all done in love4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,christ is risen6 ,what a thought was that for the blessed martyrs1 for poor creatures in the agony of fear and shame1 expecting presently to be torn to pieces or burnt alive4 ,death1 this horrible death1 cannot conquer me1 weak and fearful as ,i am1 for my ,lord and ,master1 for whom ,i am going to suffer1 has conquered death1 and ,he will not let it conquer me4 ,he is stronger than hell and death1 and ,he will not suffer me in my last hour1 for any pains of death1 to fall from ,him4 ,he is ,king of ,heaven and ,earth1 and ,he will care for ,his own4 ,what comfort to be able to say3 ,ay1 ,i am torn from wife and child and all which ,i love on earth2 but not for ever1 not for ever2 for ,christ rose from the dead1 and ,i1 who belong to ,christ1 shall rise as ,he did4 ,this poor flesh of mine may be burnt in flames1 devoured by ravenous beasts4 ,what matter8 ,christ the ,king of men has risen from the dead1 and become the first fruits of them that slept4 ,that same ,spirit which brought back ,his body from the grave and hell1 will bring my body also from the grave and hell1 to a nobler1 happier life with ,him in joy unspeakable1 where ,christ now sits on ,god's right hand defending me1 pitying me1 and blessing me1 holding out to me a crown of glory which shall never fade away4 ,national ,sermons4 ,these things are most bitter1 #adg and the only comfort that ,i can see in them is1 that they are bringing us all face to face with the realities of human life1 as it has been in all ages1 and giving us sterner and yet more loving1 more human1 and more divine thoughts about ourselves1 and our business here1 and the fate of those who are gone1 and awakening us out of the luxurious1 frivolous1 unreal dream 7full1 nevertheless1 of hard judgments7 in which we have been living so long1 to trust in a ,living ,father1 who is really and practically governing this world and all worlds1 and who willeth that none should perish2 and therefore has not forgotten or suddenly begun to hate and torment one single poor soul which is past out of this life into some other4 ,all are in our ,father's hands2 and1 oh6 blessed thought1 though they go down into hell1 ,thou art there also4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,jesus is the ,saviour1 the ,deliverer1 the great ,physician1 the healer of soul and body4 ,not a pang is felt1 or a tear shed on earth1 but ,he sorrows over it4 ,not a human being on earth dies young but ,he1 as ,i believe1 sorrows over it4 ,what is it which prevents ,him healing every sickness1 soothing every sorrow1 wiping away every tear now1 we cannot tell4 ,but this we can tell1 that it is ,his will that none should perish4 ,this we can tell1 that ,he is willing as ever to heal the sick1 to cleanse the leper1 to cast out devils1 to teach the ignorant1 to bind up the broken-hearted4 ,this we can tell1 that ,he will go on doing so more and more1 year by year1 and age by age4 ,this we can tell1 from ,scripture1 that ,christ is stronger than the devil4 ,this we can tell1 that ,christ and all good men1 the spirits of just men made perfect1 the wise and the great in ,god's sight1 who have left us their books1 their sayings1 their writings1 as precious health-giving heir-looms1 have been fighting1 and are fighting1 and will fight to the end1 against the devil1 and sin1 and oppression1 and misery1 and disease1 and everything which spoils and darkens the face of ,god's good earth4 ,and this we can tell1 that they will conquer at the last1 because ,christ is stronger than the devil2 good is stronger than evil2 light is stronger than darkness2 ,god's ,spirit1 the giver of life and health and order1 is stronger than all the evil customs and carelessness and cruelty and superstition which make miserable the lives1 and1 as far as we can see1 destroy the souls of thousands4 ,yes2 ,i say ,christ's kingdom is a kingdom of health and deliverance for body and soul2 and it will conquer1 and it will spread1 and it will grow1 till the nations of the world have become the kingdoms of ,god and of ,his ,christ4 ,christ reigns1 and will reign1 till ,he has put all enemies under ,his feet1 and the last of ,his enemies which shall be destroyed is ,death4 ,death is ,his enemy which ,he has conquered by rising from the dead2 and the day will come when ,death will be no more--when sickness and sorrow shall be unknown1 and ,god shall wipe tears from all eyes4 ,i say it again--never forget it--,christ is ,king1 and ,his kingdom is a kingdom of health1 of life and deliverance from all evil4 ,it always has been so from the first time our ,lord cured the leper in ,galilee2 it will be so to the end of the world4 ,national ,sermons4 ,what did the spiritual glory of ,christ's countenance at ,his transfiguration show ,his disciples1 but that ,he was a spiritual ,king1 whose strength lay in the spirit of power1 and wisdom1 and beauty1 and love1 which ,god had given ,him without measure2 and that there was such a thing as a spiritual body--such a body as each of us some day shall have if we be found in ,christ at the resurrection of the just--a body which shall not hide a man's spirit as it does here1 when it becomes subject to the wear and tear of life1 and disease1 and decay2 but a spiritual body--a body which shall be filled with our spirits1 which shall be perfectly obedient to our spirits--a body through which the glory of our spirits shall shine out1 as the glory of ,christ's spirit shone out through ,his in the transfiguration4 ,brethren1 we know not what we shall be1 but this we do know1 that when ,he shall appear we shall be like ,him1 for we shall see ,him as ,he is4 ,village ,sermons4 ,i believe1 says the ,creed1 in the ,resurrection of the ,flesh4 ,the ,bible teaches us to believe1 that we1 each of us1 as human beings1 men and women1 shall have our share in that glorious day2 not merely as ghosts1 disembodied spirits 7of which the ,bible1 thanks be to ,god1 says little or nothing71 but as real live human beings1 with new bodies of our own1 on a new earth1 under a new heaven4 ,therefore1 says ,david1 my flesh shall rest in hope2 not merely my soul1 my ghost1 but my flesh4 ,for the ,lord1 who not only died1 but rose again with ,his body1 shall raise our bodies1 according to the mighty working by which ,he subdues all things to ,himself2 and then the whole manhood of each of us1 body1 soul1 and spirit1 shall have our perfect consummation and bliss in ,his eternal and everlasting glory4 ,that is our hope4 ,national ,sermons4 ,those who die in the fear of ,god and in the faith of ,christ do not really taste of death2 to them there is no death1 but only a change of place1 a change of state2 they pass at once into some new life1 with all their powers1 all their feelings1 unchanged2 still the same living1 thinking1 active beings which they were here on earth4 4 4 4 ,rest they may--rest they will1 if they need rest4 ,but what is their rest8 ,not idleness1 but peace of mind4 ,to rest from sin1 from sorrow1 from fear1 from doubt1 from care2 this is true rest4 ,above all1 to rest from the worst weariness of all--knowing one's duty1 and not being able to do it4 ,that is true rest--the rest of ,god1 who works for ever1 and is at rest for ever2 as the stars over our heads move for ever1 thousands of miles a day1 and yet are at perfect rest1 because they move orderly1 harmoniously1 fulfilling the law which ,god has given them4 ,perfect rest1 in perfect work2 that surely is the rest of blessed spirits1 till the final consummation of all things1 when ,christ shall have made up the number of ,his elect4 ,and if it be so1 what comfort for us who must die1 what comfort for us who have seen others die1 if death be but a new birth into some higher life2 if all that it changes in us is our body--the mere husk and shell of us--such a change as comes over the snake when he casts his old skin1 and comes out fresh and gay1 or even the crawling caterpillar1 which breaks its prison1 and spreads its wings to the sun as a fair butterfly8 ,where is the sting of death then1 if death can sting1 and poison1 and corrupt nothing of us for which our friends love us2 nothing of us with which we could do service to men or ,god8 ,where is the victory of the grave1 if so far from the grave holding us down1 it frees us from the very thing which does hold us down--the mortal body8 ,water of ,life--,sermons4 ,consider the lilies of the field4 ,we must take our ,lord's words exactly4 ,he is speaking of the lilies1 the bulbous plants which spring into flower in countless thousands every spring over the downs of ,eastern lands4 ,all the winter they are dead1 unsightly roots1 hidden in the earth4 ,but no sooner does the sun of spring shine upon their graves1 than they rise into sudden life and beauty1 as it pleases ,god1 and every seed takes its own peculiar body4 ,sown in corruption1 they are raised in incorruption2 sown in weakness1 they are raised in power2 sown in dishonour1 they are raised in glory2 delicate1 beautiful in colour1 perfuming the air with fragrance2 types of immortality1 fit for the crowns of angels4 ,consider the lilies of the field1 how they grow4 ,for even so is the ,resurrection of the dead4 ,yes1 not without a divine providence--yea1 a divine inspiration--has the blessed ,eastertide been fixed1 by the ,church of all ages1 as the season when the earth shakes off her winter's sleep2 when the birds come back1 and the flowers begin to bloom1 when every seed which falls into the ground and dies1 and rises again with a new body1 is a witness to us of the ,resurrection of ,christ2 and a witness1 too1 that we shall rise again2 that in us1 as in it1 life shall conquer death2 when every bird that comes back to sing and build among us1 every flower that blows1 is a witness to us of the ,resurrection of the ,lord and of our ,resurrection4 4 4 4 ,they obey the call of the ,lord1 the ,giver of ,life1 when they return to life1 as a type and a token to us of ,christ their ,maker1 who was dead and is alive again1 who was lost in hell on ,easter eve1 and was found again in heaven for evermore4 ,and so the resurrection of the earth from her winter's sleep1 commemorates to us1 as each blessed ,eastertide comes round1 the ,resurrection of our ,lord ,jesus ,christ1 and is a witness to us that some day life shall conquer death1 light conquer darkness1 righteousness conquer sin1 joy conquer grief2 when the whole creation1 which groaneth and travaileth in pain until now1 shall have brought forth that of which it travaileth in labour--even the new heavens and the new earth1 wherein shall be neither sighing nor sorrow1 but ,god shall wipe away tears from all eyes4 ,discipline and other ,sermons4 ,death is not death if it kills no part of us save that which hindered us from perfect life4 ,death is not death1 if it raises us in a moment from darkness into light1 from weakness into strength1 from sinfulness into holiness4 ,death is not death1 if it brings us nearer to ,christ who is the fount of life4 ,death is not death1 if it perfects our faith by sight1 and lets us behold ,him in whom we have believed4 ,death is not death1 if it gives us to those whom we have loved and lost1 for whom we have lived1 for whom we long to live again4 ,death is not death1 if it joins the child to the mother who was gone before4 ,death is not death1 if it takes away from that mother for ever all a mother's anxieties1 a mother's fears1 and lets her see1 in the gracious countenance of her ,saviour1 a sure and certain pledge that those whom she has left behind are safe1 safe with ,christ and in ,christ1 through all the chances and dangers of this mortal life4 ,death is not death1 if it rids us of doubt and fear1 of chance and change1 of space and time1 and all which space and time bring forth1 and then destroy4 ,death is not death2 for ,christ has conquered death for ,himself1 and for those who trust in ,him4 ,water of ,life--,sermons4 ,out of ,god's boundless bosom1 the fount of life1 we came2 through selfish1 stormy youth and contrite tears--just not too late2 through manhood not altogether useless2 through slow and chill old age1 we return from ,whence we came2 to the ,bosom of ,god once more--to go forth again1 it may be1 with fresh knowledge1 and fresh powers1 to nobler work4 ,amen4 ,essays4 ,,vii4 ,,prayer ,,out ,,of ,,the ,,deep4 ,hear my prayer1 ,o ,god2 and hide not ,thyself from my petition4 ,take heed unto me and hear me2 how ,i mourn in my prayer and am vexed4--,psalm iv4 #a1 #b4 ,in my trouble ,i will call upon the ,lord1 and complain unto my ,god2 so shall ,he hear my voice out of ,his holy temple1 and my complaint shall come before ,him2 it shall enter even into ,his ears4--,ps4 xviii4 #e1 #f4 ,the ,lord is nigh unto them that call upon ,him2 ,he also will hear their cry1 and will help them4--,psalm cxlv4 #ah1 #ai4 ,in the day when ,i cried ,thou answeredst me1 and strengthenedst me with strength in my soul4--,psalm cxxxviii4 #c4 ,the older ,i grow1 and the more ,i see of the chances and changes of this mortal life1 and of the needs and longings of the human heart1 the more important seems this question3 ,is there anywhere in the universe any being who can hear our prayers8 ,is prayer a superfluous folly1 or the highest prudence8 ,i say3 ,is there a being who can ever hear our prayers8 ,i do not say a being who will always answer them1 and give us all we ask2 but one who will at least hear1 who will listen consider what is fit to be granted or not1 and grant or refuse accordingly8 ,is that strange instinct of worship which rises in the heart of man as soon as he begins to think1 to become a civilized being and not a savage1 to be disregarded as a childish dream when he rises to a higher civilization still8 ,is the experience of men1 heathen as well as ,christian1 for all these ages to go for nought8 ,has every utterance that has ever gone up from suffering and doubting humanity gone up in vain8 ,have the prayers of saints1 the hymns of psalmists1 the agonies of martyrs1 the aspirations of poets1 the thoughts of sages1 the cries of the oppressed1 the pleadings of the mother for her child1 the maiden praying in her chamber for her lover upon the distant battlefield1 the soldier answering her prayer from afar off with ,keep quiet1 ,i am in ,god's hands--those very utterances of humanity which seemed to us most noble1 most pure1 most beautiful1 most divine--been all in vain8 ,mere impertinences1 the babblings of fair dreams1 poured forth into no where1 to no thing1 and in vain8 ,has every suffering1 searching soul which ever gazed up into the darkness of the unknown1 in hopes of catching even a glimpse of a divine ,eye1 beholding all1 and ordering all1 and pitying all1 gazed up in vain8 ,oh6 my friends1 those who believe1 or fancy they believe1 such things1 and can preach such doctrines without pity and sorrow1 know not of what they rob a mankind already but too miserable by its own folly and its own sin--a mankind which if it have not hope in ,god and in ,christ1 is truly1 as ,homer said of old1 more miserable than the beasts of the field4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,when the human heart asks1 ,have we not only a ,god in ,heaven1 but a ,father in ,heaven8 that question can only be answered by our ,lord ,jesus ,christ4 ,truly ,he said1 ,no one cometh unto the ,father but by ,me4 ,the only begotten ,son1 who is in the bosom of the ,father1 ,he hath revealed ,him4 ,and therefore we can find boundless comfort in the words1 ,such as the ,father is1 such is the ,son and such the ,holy ,ghost4 ,for now we know that there is ,a ,,man in the midst of the throne who is the brightness of ,god's glory and the express image of ,his person--a high priest who can be touched by the feeling of our infirmities1 seeing ,he was tempted in all things like as we are4 ,to ,him we can cry with human passion and in human words1 because we know that ,his human heart will respond to our human hearts1 and that ,his human heart again will respond to ,his ,divine ,spirit1 and that ,his ,divine ,spirit is the same as the ,divine ,spirit of ,his ,father1 for their wills and minds are ,one1 and their will and their mind is boundless love to sinful men4 ,yes1 we can look up in our extreme need by faith into the sacred face of ,christ1 and by faith take refuge within ,his sacred heart1 saying1 ,if it be good for me1 ,he will give what ,i ask2 and if ,he gives it not1 it is because that too is good for me1 and for others beside me4 ,in all the chances and changes of this mortal life we can say to ,him1 as ,he said in that supreme hour--,if it be possible let this cup pass from ,me1 nevertheless not ,my will but ,thine be done2 sure that ,he will present that prayer to ,his ,father and to our ,father1 and to ,his ,god and our ,god2 and that whatsoever be the answer vouchsafed by ,him whose ways are not as our ways1 nor ,his thoughts as our thoughts1 the prayer will not have gone up to ,christ in vain4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,i have been praying long and earnestly1 and have no fears now4 ,whatsoever ye shall ask in my name1 believing1 ye shall receive4 ,lord1 ,i believe1 help ,thou my unbelief4 ,those two texts were my stronghold when the night of misery was most utterly dark1 and in the strength of them we shall prevail4 ,fret not then1 neither be anxious2 what ,god intends ,he will do4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,the longer ,i live the more ,i see that the ,lord's ,prayer is the pattern of all prayers2 and whether it be consistent with that to ask that ,god should alter the course of the universe in the same breath that we say1 ,thy will be done on earth--judge you4 ,i do not object to praying for special things4 ,god forbid6 ,i do it myself4 ,i cannot help doing it any more than a child in the dark can help calling for its mother4 ,only it seems to me1 that when we pray1 ,grant this day that we run into no kind of danger1 we ought to lay our stress on the run1 rather than on the danger2 and ask ,god not to take away the danger by altering the course of nature1 but to give us light and guidance whereby to avoid it4 ,letters and ,memories4 ,pray night and day very quietly1 like a little1 weary child1 for everything you want1 in body as well as in soul--the least thing as well as the greatest--nothing is too much to ask ,god for--nothing too great for ,him to grant--and try to thank ,him for everything4 ,glory be to thee1 ,o ,god6 ,letters and ,memories4 ,when you are in the deep--whatever that depth be--cry to ,god3 to ,god ,himself1 and none but ,god4 ,if you can go to the pure fountain-head1 why drink of the stream1 which must have gathered something of defilement as it flows8 ,if you can go to ,god ,himself1 why go to any of ,god's creatures1 however holy1 pure1 and loving8 ,go to ,god1 who is light of light1 life of life4 ,from ,him all goodness flows4 ,go then to ,him ,himself4 ,out of the deep1 however deep1 cry unto ,god1 unto ,god ,himself4 ,if ,david the ,jew of old could do so1 much more we who are baptized into ,christ2 much more can we who have access by one ,spirit unto the ,father2 much more can we who1 if we know who we are and where we are1 should come boldly to the ,throne of ,grace1 to find mercy and grace to help us in the time of need4 ,hath ,he promised1 and shall ,he not do it8 ,to every one of you--however weak1 however ignorant1 aye1 however sinful1 if you desire to be delivered from those sins--this grace is given2 liberty to cry out of the depth to ,god ,himself1 who made sun and stars1 all heaven and earth2 liberty to stand face to face with the ,father of the spirits of all flesh1 and cling to the ,one ,being who can never fail nor change1 even to the ,one immortal1 eternal ,god4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,the seed which we sow--the seed of repentance1 the seed of humility1 the seed of sorrowful prayers for help--shall take root and grow and bring forth fruit1 we know not how1 in the good time of ,god who cannot change4 ,we may be sad--we may be weary2 our eyes may wait and watch for the ,lord more than they who watch for the morning2 but it must be as those who watch for the morning1 for the morning which must and will come2 for the sun will surely rise1 and the day will surely dawn1 and the ,saviour will surely deliver those who cry unto ,him4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,for the poor soul who is abased1 who is down1 and in the depth2 who feels his own weakness1 folly1 ignorance1 sinfulness1 and out of the deep cries unto ,god as a lost child crying after its father--even as a lost lamb bleating after the ewe--of that poor soul1 be his prayers never so confused1 stupid1 and ill expressed--of him it is written3 ,the ,lord helpeth them that fall2 ,he is nigh unto all that call upon ,him2 ,he will fulfil the desire of those that fear ,him2 ,he also will hear their cry1 and will help them4 ,westminster ,sermons4 ,,prayers ,,and ,,confessions ,,for ,,pardon ,,and ,,likeness ,,to ,,god4 ,o ,lamb eternal1 beyond all place and time6 ,o ,lamb of ,god1 slain eternally before the foundation of the world6 ,o ,lamb that liest slain eternally in the midst of the throne of ,god6 ,let the blood of life1 which flows from ,thee1 procure me pardon for the past2 let the water of life1 which flows from ,thee1 give me strength for the future4 ,i come to cast away my own life1 my life of self and selfishness1 which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts1 that ,i may live it no more1 and to receive ,thy life1 which is created after the likeness of ,god1 in righteousness and true holiness1 that ,i may live it for ever and ever1 and find it a well of life springing up in me to everlasting life4 ,eternal ,goodness1 make me good like ,thee4 ,eternal ,wisdom1 make me wise like ,thee4 ,eternal ,justice1 make me just like ,thee4 ,eternal ,love1 make me loving like ,thee4 ,amen4 ,,for ,,light4 ,o ,lord6 ,love who embracest the universe1 ,light who lightest every man that comes into the world1 take away from me all darkness of soul and hardness of heart4 ,fill me with ,thy light1 that ,i may see all things in light4 ,fill me with ,thy love1 that ,i may love all things which ,thou hast made4 ,amen4 ,come to us1 ,o ,lord6 open the eyes of our souls1 and show us the things which belong to our peace and the path of life1 that we may see that1 though all man's inventions and plans come to an end1 yet ,thy commandment is exceedingly broad--broad enough for rich and poor1 for scholar1 tradesman1 and labourer1 for our prosperity in this life and our salvation in the life to come4 ,amen4 ,,for ,,true ,,glory4 ,o ,god1 quench in us all which is selfish1 idle1 mean1 and quicken to life in us all which is ,god-like and for ,god1 that so we may attain at last to the true glory1 the glory which comes1 not from selfish ambition1 not from selfish pride1 not from selfish ease1 but from getting rid of selfishness in all its shapes--the glory which ,christ alone has in perfection--the glory before which every knee will one day bow whether in earth or heaven--even the glory of doing our duty1 regardless of what it costs us1 in the station to which each of us has been called by his ,father in ,heaven4 ,amen4 ,,for ,,holiness4 ,o ,lord ,jesus ,christ6 ,exalt me with ,thee so to know the mystery of life1 that ,i may use the earthly as the appointed expression and type of the heavenly2 and by using to ,thy glory the natural body1 ,i may be fit to be exalted to the use of the spiritual body4 ,amen4 ,,for ,,purity ,,and ,,goodness4 ,purge ,thou me1 ,o ,lord1 or ,i shall never be pure2 wash ,thou me1 and then alone shall ,i be clean4 ,for ,thou requirest not frames or feelings1 not pride and self-conceit1 but truth in the inward parts2 and wilt make me to understand wisdom secretly4 ,o ,god1 ,thou art good1 and ,i am bad2 and for that very reason ,i come4 ,i come to be made good4 ,i adore ,thy goodness1 and ,i long to copy it3 but ,i cannot unless ,thou helpest me4 ,purge me4 ,make me clean4 ,cleanse me from my secret faults1 and give me truth in the inward parts4 ,do what ,thou wilt with me4 ,train me as ,thou wilt4 ,punish me if it be necessary4 ,only make me good4 ,amen4 ,thou knowest1 ,lord1 the secrets of our hearts4 ,shut not ,thy merciful ears to our prayer2 but spare us1 ,o ,lord1 most holy6 ,o ,god1 most mighty6 ,thou worthy ,judge ,eternal1 and suffer us not1 for any temptation of the world1 the flesh1 or the devil1 to fall from ,thee4 ,i1 ,lord1 am ,i3 and what ,i am--a very poor1 pitiful1 sinful person4 ,but ,thou1 ,lord1 art ,thou2 and what ,thou art--,perfect6 ,thou art ,goodness itself4 ,and therefore ,thou canst1 and ,thou wilt1 make me what ,i ought to be at last1 a good person4 ,to ,thee ,i can bring the burden of this undying ,i1 which ,i carry with me1 too often in shame and sadness4 ,i ask ,thee to help me to bear it4 ,guide me1 teach me1 strengthen me1 till ,i become such as ,thou wouldst have me be3 pure and gentle1 truthful and high-minded1 brave and able1 courteous and generous1 dutiful and useful like ,thy ,son1 ,jesus ,christ4 ,amen4 ,,prayer ,,against ,,being ,,confounded4 ,o ,lord1 ,i am oppressed1 crushed--the heart is beaten out of me4 ,i have nothing to say for myself4 ,undertake for me4 ,o ,lord1 confound me not4 ,i know ,i am weak1 ignorant1 unsuccessful2 full of faults and failings1 which make me ashamed of myself every day of my life4 ,i have gone astray1 like a sheep that is lost4 ,but seek ,thy servant1 ,o ,lord1 for ,i do not forget ,thy commandments4 ,i am trying to learn my duty4 ,i am trying to do my duty4 ,i have stuck unto ,thy testimonies4 ,o ,lord1 have mercy and confound me not4 ,man may confound me4 ,but do not ,thou of ,thy mercy and pity1 ,o ,lord4 ,let me not find when ,i die1 or before ,i die1 that all my labour has been in vain2 that ,i am not wiser1 not more useful after all4 ,let not my gray hairs go down with sorrow to the grave4 ,let me not die with the miserable thought that in spite of all my struggles to do my duty1 my life has been a failure and ,i a fool4 ,let me not wake in the next life1 to be utterly confounded3 to find that ,i was all wrong1 and have nothing left but disappointment and confusion of face4 ,o ,lord1 who didst endure all shame for me1 save me from that most utter shame4 ,thou art good and just4 ,thou wilt not leave my soul in hell4 ,o ,god1 in ,thee have ,i trusted2 let me never be confounded4 ,amen4 ,,for ,,peace ,,of ,,mind4 ,o ,father1 grant me ,thy peace4 ,i have not a peaceful spirit in me2 and ,i know that ,i shall never get it by thinking1 and reading1 and understanding1 for it passes all that2 and peace lies far away beyond it1 in the very essence of ,thine undivided1 unmoved1 absolute1 ,eternal ,godhead1 which no change nor decay of this created world1 nor sin or folly of men or devils1 can ever alter2 but which abideth for ever what it is1 in perfect rest1 and perfect power1 and perfect love4 ,soothe this restless1 greedy1 fretful soul of mine1 as a mother soothes a sick and feverish child4 ,how ,thou wilt do it ,i do not know4 ,it passes all understanding4 ,but though the sick child cannot reach the mother1 the mother is at hand and can reach it4 ,and ,thou art more than a mother3 ,thou art the ,everlasting ,father4 ,though the eagle by flying cannot reach the sun1 yet the sun is at hand1 and can reach all the earth1 and pour its light and warmth over all things4 ,thou art more than the sun2 ,thou art the ,light and ,life of all things4 ,pour ,thy ,light and ,thy ,life over me1 that ,i may see as ,thou seest1 and live as ,thou livest1 and be at peace with myself and all the world1 as ,thou art at peace with ,thyself and all the world4 ,pour ,thy love over me1 that ,i may love as ,thou lovest4 ,again1 ,i say1 ,i know not how1 for it passes all understanding2 but ,i hope that ,thou wilt do it for me1 ,i trust that ,thou wilt do it for me1 for ,i believe that ,thou art ,love1 and that ,thy mercy is over all ,thy works4 ,i believe that ,thou so lovest the world that ,thou hast sent ,thy ,son to save the world and me4 ,i know not how1 for that too passes understanding2 but ,i believe that ,thou wilt do it1 for ,i believe that ,thou art ,love1 and that ,thy mercy is over all ,thy works1 even over me4 ,i believe that ,thy will is peace on earth1 even peace to me1 restless and unquiet as ,i am1 and goodwill to all men1 even to me1 the chief of sinners4 ,amen4 ,,prayer ,,before ,,holy ,,communion4 ,o blessed ,jesus6 ,saviour1 who agonized for us6 ,god ,almighty1 who didst make ,thyself weak for the love of us6 ,oh1 write that love upon our hearts so deeply that neither pleasure nor sorrow1 life nor death may wipe it away6 ,thou hast sacrificed ,thyself for us2 oh1 give us hearts to sacrifice ourselves for ,thee6 ,thou art the ,vine1 we are the branches4 ,let ,thy priceless blood1 shed for us on the cross1 flow like life-giving sap through all our hearts and minds1 and fill us with ,thy righteousness1 that we may be sacrifices fit for ,thee4 ,stir us up to offer to ,thee1 ,o ,lord1 our bodies1 our souls1 our spirits2 and in all we love and all we learn1 in all we plan and all we do1 to offer ourselves1 our labours1 our pleasures1 our sorrows1 to ,thee2 to work for ,thy kingdom1 to live as those who are not their own1 but bought with ,thy blood1 fed with ,thy body2 and enable us now1 in ,thy most ,holy ,sacrament1 to offer to ,thee our repentance1 our prayers1 our praises1 living1 reasonable1 and spiritual sacrifices--,thine from our birth-hour--,thine now1 and ,thine for ever6 ,amen4 ,,confession ,,of ,,sin4 ,father1 ,i have sinned against ,thee1 and am not worthy to be called ,thy child2 but ,i come to ,thee4 ,father1 ,i hate myself2 but ,thou lovest me4 ,i do not understand myself2 but ,thou dost1 and ,thou wilt be merciful to the work of ,thine own hands4 ,i cannot guide and help myself1 but ,thou canst help me1 and ,thou wilt too1 because ,thou art my ,father1 and nothing can part me from ,thy love1 or from the love of ,thy ,son1 my ,king4 ,i come and claim my share in ,thee1 just because ,i have nothing1 and can bring ,thee nothing1 but lie at ,thy gate as a beggar full of sores1 desiring to be fed with the crumbs from ,thy table4 ,and if ,i would help the wretched1 how much more wilt ,thou help me4 ,thy name is ,love1 and ,thy glory is the likeness of ,thy ,son ,jesus ,christ1 who said1 ,come to me1 all ye that are weary and heavy laden1 and ,i will give you rest2 ,if ye being evil know how to give good gifts to your children1 how much more shall your heavenly ,father give ,his ,holy ,spirit to them that ask ,him4 ,amen4 ,,confession ,,of ,,weakness4 ,o ,god my ,father1 ,i am ,thine2 save me1 for ,i have sought ,thy commandments4 ,i am ,thine--not merely ,thy creature1 ,o ,god--the very birds1 and bees1 and flowers are that2 and do their duty far better than ,i--,god forgive me--do mine4 ,i am ,thine--not merely ,thy child--but ,i am ,thy school child4 ,o ,lord ,jesus ,christ1 ,i claim ,thy help as my schoolmaster1 as well as my ,lord and ,saviour4 ,i am the least of ,thy school children2 and it may be the most ignorant and stupid4 ,i do not pretend to be a scholar1 a divine1 a philosopher1 a saint4 ,i am a very weak1 insufficient scholar1 sitting on the lowest form in ,thy great school-house1 which is the whole world1 and trying to spell out the mere letters of ,thy alphabet1 in hope that hereafter ,i may be able to make out whole words and whole sentences of ,thy commandments1 and having learnt them1 to do them4 ,if ,thou wilt but teach me ,thy statutes1 ,o ,lord1 then ,i will try to keep them to the end2 for ,i long to be on ,thy side1 and about ,thy work4 ,i long to help1 be it ever so little1 in making myself better1 and my neighbour better4 ,i long to be useful1 and not useless2 a fruit-bearing tree1 and not a noxious weed in ,thy garden2 and therefore ,i pray that ,thou wilt not cut me down or root me up1 nor let foul creatures trample me under foot4 ,have mercy upon me1 ,o ,lord1 in my trouble1 for the sake of the truth which ,i long to learn1 and for the good which ,i long to do4 ,poor weak plant though ,i may be1 ,i am still a plant of ,thy planting1 which is struggling to grow1 and flower1 and bear fruit to eternal life2 and ,thou wilt not despise the work of ,thine own hands1 ,o ,lord1 who died that ,i might live8 ,thou wilt not let me perish6 ,i have stuck unto ,thy testimonies4 ,o ,lord1 confound me not6 ,amen4 ,,confession ,,of ,,one ,,in ,,confusion ,,of ,,spirit4 ,o ,god1 ,thou knowest1 and ,thou alone1 how far ,i am right1 and how far wrong4 ,i leave myself in ,thy hand1 certain that ,thou wilt deal fairly1 justly1 lovingly with me1 as a ,father with his son4 ,i do not pretend to be better than ,i am2 neither will ,i pretend to be worse than ,i am4 ,truly ,i know nothing about it4 ,i1 ignorant human being that ,i am1 can never fully know how far ,i am right1 and how far wrong4 ,i find light and darkness fighting together in my heart1 and ,i cannot divide between them4 ,but ,thou1 ,lord1 canst4 ,thou knowest4 ,thou hast made me2 ,thou lovest me2 ,thou hast sent ,thy ,son into the world to make me what ,i ought to be4 ,thou wiliest not that ,i should perish1 but come to the knowledge of the truth2 and therefore ,i believe that ,i shall not perish1 but come to the knowledge of the truth about ,thee1 about my own character1 my own duty1 about everything which it is needful for me to know4 ,therefore1 ,o ,lord1 ,i will go boldly on1 doing my duty as well as ,i can1 though not perfectly1 day by day2 and asking ,thee day by day to feed my soul with daily bread4 ,thou feedest my body with daily bread4 ,how much more wilt ,thou feed my mind and my heart1 more precious by far than my body4 ,lord1 ,i will trust ,thee for soul and body alike2 and if ,i need correcting for my sins1 ,i know this1 at least1 that the worst thing that can happen to me1 or to any man1 is to do wrong and not to be corrected2 and the best thing is to be set right1 even by hard blows1 as often as ,i stray out of the way4 ,therefore1 ,o ,lord1 ,i will take my punishment quietly and manfully1 and try to thank ,thee for it1 as ,i ought2 for ,i know that ,thou wilt not punish me beyond what ,i deserve1 but far below what ,i deserve4 ,i know ,thou wilt punish me only to bring me to myself1 and to correct me1 and purge me1 and strengthen me4 ,i believe1 ,o ,lord1 on the warrant of ,thine own word ,i believe it--undeserved as the honour is1 that ,thou art my ,father1 and lovest me2 ,thou dost not afflict any man willingly1 or grieve the children of men out of passion or out of spite4 ,thou wiliest not that ,i1 or any man1 should perish2 but ,thou wiliest have all men to be saved and come to the knowledge of the truth1 for ,jesus ,christ ,his sake4 ,amen4 ,,confession ,,of ,a ,,tormented ,,soul4 ,o ,lord1 ,i am in misery--my soul is sore troubled--for ,i have sinned1 and ,i confess that ,i only receive the due reward of my deeds4 ,i have earned my shame1 ,i have earned my sorrow2 ,lord1 ,i have deserved it all4 ,i look back on wasted time and wasted powers4 ,i look round on ruined health1 ruined fortune1 ruined hopes2 ,i confess that ,i deserve it all4 ,but ,thou hast endured more than this for me1 and ,thou hast done nothing amiss4 ,for me ,thou didst suffer1 for me ,thou hast been crucified1 and me ,thou hast been trying to save all through the years of my vanity4 ,perhaps ,i have not wearied out ,thy love1 perhaps ,i have not conquered ,thy patience4 ,i will take the blessed chance4 ,i will still cast myself upon ,thy love4 ,o ,lord1 ,i have deserved all my misery4 ,yet1 ,lord1 remember me when ,thou comest into ,thy kingdom4 ,amen4 ,father6 not our will but ,thine be done4 ,all things come from ,thy hand1 and therefore all things come from ,thy love4 ,we have received good from ,thy hand1 and shall we not receive evil8 ,though ,thou slay us1 yet will we trust in ,thee4 ,for ,thou art gracious and merciful1 long-suffering and of great goodness4 ,thou art loving to every man1 and ,thy mercy is over all ,thy works4 ,thou art righteous in all ,thy ways1 and holy in all ,thy doings4 ,thou art nigh unto them that call upon ,thee4 ,thou wilt hear their cry1 and wilt help them2 for all ,thou desirest1 when ,thou sendest trouble on us1 is to make us wiser and better4 ,and that ,thou canst only make us by teaching us the knowledge of ,thyself4 ,glory be to ,thee1 ,o ,god6 ,amen4 ,,the ,,end4 #bf ,death of a ,husband4 #cj ,death of a ,parent4 #adg ,deaths on the battlefield4