,a ,,fair ,,p5it5t  ,by ,wilkie ,coll9s 
,ab\t ,a ,fair ,p5it5t  ,?is /ory fir/  
appe>$ 9 ,*>les ,dick5s' magaz9e1       
,h\sehold ,words1 volume #af1 numb]     
#chb1 ,july #ah1 #aheg4 ,publi%$        
anonym\sly1 z all contributions to !    
magaz9e 71 x 0 attribut$ def9itely to   
,wilkie ,coll9s by ,anne ,lohrli 9 h]   
analysis ( ! magaz9e's f9ancial acc\nts4
     ,a ,,fair ,,p5it5t   ,*>les ,p9eau 
,duclos 0 a ,fr5* writ] ( biographies & 
novels1 :o liv$ & work$ dur+ ! fir/ half
 ( ! eighte5? c5tury4 ,he prosp]$       
suffici5tly well1 z a lit]>y man1 to be 
made secret>y to ! ,fr5* ,academy1 & to 
be all[$ to succe$ ,voltaire 9 ! (fice (
 hi/oriograph] ( ,france4 ,he has left  
beh9d him1 9 8 own c\ntry1 ! reputation 
( a lively writ] ( ! second class1 :o   
address$ ! public ( 8 day ) fair        
success1 & :o1 s9ce 8 dea?1 has n tr\bl$
 po/]ity to take any p>ticul> notice (  
him4  ,among ! pap]s left by ,duclos1   
two manuscripts 7 f\nd1 :i* he probably 
int5d$ to turn to "s lit]>y acc\nt4 ,!  

fir/ 0 a brief ,memoir1 writt5 by       
himself1 ( a ,fr5*woman1 nam$           
,mademoiselle ,gauti]1 :o began life z  
an actress & :o end$ x z a ,c>melite    
nun4 ,! second manuscript 0 ! lady's own
 acc\nt ( ! process ( h] conv]sion1 & ( 
! circum/ances :i* att5d$ h] moral      
passage f ! /ate ( a s9n] to ! /ate ( a 
sa9t4 ,!re are c]ta9 national           
peculi>ities 9 ! "* ( ,mademoiselle     
,gauti] & 9 ! n>rative ( h] conv]sion1  
:i* are p]haps int]e/+ en\gh to be      
reproduc$ ) "s *ance ( pleas+ ! pres5t  
day4  ,x appe>s1 f ! acc\nt giv5 ( h] by
 ,duclos1 t ,mademoiselle ,gauti] made  
h] appe>ance on ! /age ( ! ,?tre        
,franois 9 ! ye> sev5te5 hundr$ &       
sixte54 ,%e is describ$ z a h&some      
woman1 ) a f9e figure1 a fre%           
complexion1 a lively disposition1 & a   
viol5t temp]4 ,besides possess+ capacity
 z an actress1 %e c\ld write v good     
v]ses1 %e 0 clev] at pa9t+ 9 m9iature1  
&1 mo/ rem>kable quality ( all1 %e 0    
possess$ ( prodigi\s muscul> /r5g?4 ,x  

is record$ ( ,mademoiselle1 t %e c\ld   
roll up a silv] plate ) h] h&s1 & t %e  
cov]$ h]self ) di/9ction 9 a trial (    
/r5g? ) no less a p]son ?an ! fam\s     
soldi]1 ,m>%al ,saxe4  ,nobody :o is at 
all acqua9t$ ) ! social hi/ory ( !      
eighte5? c5tury 9 ,france1 ne$ be told t
 ,mademoiselle ,gauti] _h a long li/ (  
lov]s1--= ! mo/ "p1 p]sons ( quality1   
m>%als1 c\nts1 & s =?4 ,! only man1     
h[ev]1 :o really atta*$ h] to him1 0 an 
actor at ! ,?tre ,franois1 a fam\s play]
 9 8 day1 nam$ ,qu9ault ,dufresne4      
,mademoiselle ,gauti] seems to h lov$   
him ) all ! ard\r ( h] naturally        
passionate disposition4 ,at fir/1 he    
return$ h] affection2 b1 z soon z %e    
v5tur$ to te/ ! s9c]ity ( 8 atta*m5t by 
speak+ ( m>riage1 he cool$ t[>ds h]     
imm$iately1 & ! connection betwe5 !m 0  
brok5 (f4 ,9 all h] =m] love-affairs1 %e
 _h be5 not$ = ! high tone :i* %e adopt$
 t[>ds h] admir]s1 & = ! despotic       
au?ority :i* %e ex]cis$ ov] !m ev5 9 h] 
gaye/ mom5ts4 ,b ! sev]ance ( h]        

connection ) ,qu9ault ,dufresne w\nd$ h]
 to h] he>t4 ,%e _h lov$ ! man s de>ly1 
_h made s _m sacrifices = him1 _h c\nt$ 
s fondly on ! devotion ( h] :ole future 
life to him1 t ! fir/ discov]y ( 8      
coldness t[>ds h] broke h] _s at once & 
= ev]4 ,%e fell into a condition (      
hopeless melan*oly1 look$ back ) remorse
 & horror at h] pa/ life1 & ab&on$ !    
/age & ! society 9 :i* %e _h liv$1 to   
end h] days rep5tantly 9 ! "* ( a       
,c>melite nun4  ,s f>1 h] hi/ory is !   
hi/ory ( hundr$s ( o!r wom5 be=e h] "t &
 aft] x4 ,! prom95t int]e/ ( h] life1 = 
! /ud5t ( human nature1 lies 9 ! /ory ( 
h] conv]sion1 z told by h]self4 ,!      
great] "p ( ! n>rative--e page ( :i* is 
m or less *>act]i/ic ( ! ,fr5*woman ( ! 
eighte5? c5tury--may be giv51 ) c]ta9   
suppressions & abridgm5ts1 9 h] own     
words4 ,! read] w obs]ve1 at ! outset1  
"o curi\s fact4 ,mademoiselle ,gauti]   
does n s mu* z h9t at ! influ5ce :i* !  
loss ( h] lov] _h 9 dispos+ h] m9d to   
reflect on s]i\s subjects4 ,%e describes

 h] conv]sion z if x _h tak5 its rise 9 
a sudd5 inspiration f ,heav54 ,ev5 ! "n 
( ,qu9ault ,dufresne is n once m5tion$ f
 "o end ( h] n>rative to ! o!r4   ,on ! 
tw5ty-fif? ( ,april1 sev5te5 hundr$ &   
tw5ty-two 7writes ,mademoiselle         
,gauti]71 :ile ,i 0 /ill lead+ a life ( 
pleasure--accord+ to ! p]nici\s ideas ( 
pleasure :i* pass curr5t 9 ! _w--,i     
happ5 to awake1 contr>y to my usual     
cu/om1 betwe5 eight & n9e o'clock 9 !   
morn+4 ,i rememb] t x is my bir?day2 ,i 
r+ = my p2 & my maid answ]s ! bell1     
al>m$ by ! idea t ,i am ill4 ,i tell h] 
to dress me t ,i may g to mass4 ,i g to 
! ,*ur* ( ! ,cordeli]s1 foll[$ by my    
footman1 & tak+ ) me a little orphan :om
 ,i _h adopt$4 ,! fir/ "p ( ! mass is   
celebrat$ )\t attract+ my att5tion2 b1  
at ! second "p ! accus+ voice ( my      
consci5ce sudd5ly beg9s to speak4 ,:at  
br+s y "h8 x says4 ,d y come to rew>d   
,god = mak+ y ! attractive p]son t y    
are1 by mortally transgress+ ,8 laws e  
day ( y\r life8 ,i he> t "q1 & ,i am    

unspeakably ov]:elm$ by x4 ,i quit !    
*air on :i* ,i h hi!rto be5 lean+       
c>elessly1 & ,i pro/rate myself 9 an    
agony ( remorse on ! pavem5t ( ! *ur*4  
,! mass ov]1 ,i s5d home ! footman & !  
orphan1 rema9+ beh9d myself1 plung$ 9   
inconceivable p]plexity4 ,at la/ ,i r\se
 myself on a sudd52 ,i g to ! sacri/y2  
,i dem& a mass = my own prop] advantage 
e day2 ,i det]m9e to att5d x regul>ly2  
&1 aft] ?ree h\rs ( agitation1 ,i return
 home1 resolv$ to ent] on ! pa? t leads 
to ju/ification4  ,six mon?s pass$4 ,e  
morn+ ,i w5t to my mass3 e ev5+ ,i sp5t 
9 my cu/om>y dissipations4  ,"s ( my    
fri5ds indulg$ 9 consid]able m]rim5t at 
my exp5se :5 !y f\nd out my con/ant     
att5dance at mass4 ,accord+ly1 ,i       
disguis$ myself z a boy1 :5 ,i w5t to   
*ur*1 to escape obs]vation4 ,my disguise
 0 f\nd out1 & ! jokes aga9/ me 7       
r$\bl$4 ,^u ?is1 ,i began to ?9k ( !    
words ( ! ,gospel1 :i* decl>e !         
impossibility ( s]v+ two ma/]s4 ,i      
det]m9$ to ab&on ! s]vice ( ,mammon4  ,!

 fir/ vanity ,i gave up 0 ! vanity (    
keep+ a maid4 ,by way ( fur!r accu/om+  
myself to ! retreat f ! _w :i* ,i n[    
began to m$itate1 ,i decl9$ all         
invitations to p>ties "u ! pretext (    
indisposition4 ,b ! ne>] ! ,ea/] "t     
approa*$ at :i* ,i _h settl$ 9 my own   
m9d def9itely to turn my back on worldly
 temptations & pleasures1 ! m viol5t    
became my int]nal /ruggles ) myself4 ,my
 heal? suff]$ "u !m to su* an ext5t t ,i
 0 tr\bl$ ) p]petual attacks ( ret*+ &  
sickness1 :i*1 h[ev]1 did n prev5t me f 
writ+ my g5]al confession1 address$ to !
 vic> ( ,sa9t ,sulpice1 ! p>i% 9 :i* ,i 
liv$4  ,j ,heav56 :at did ,i n suff] "s 
days aft]w>ds1 :5 ,i unit$ ar\nd me at  
d9n]1 = ! la/ "t1 all ! fri5ds :o _h be5
 de>e/ to me 9 ! days ( my worldly life6
 ,:at words c describe ! tumult ( my    
he>t :5 "o ( my gue/s said to me1 ,y are
 giv+ u too good a d9n] = a ,w$nesday 9 
,passion ,week2 & :5 ano!r answ]$1      
je/+ly1 ,y =get t ?is is h] f>ewell d9n]
 to h] fri5ds6 ,i felt ready to fa9t    

:ile !y 7 talk+1 & rose f table pretext+
 z an excuse1 t ,i _h a paym5t to make t
 ev5+1 :i* ,i c\ld n 9 hon\r def] any   
long]4 ,! company rose ) me1 & saw me to
 ! door4 ,i got into my c>riage1 & !    
company return$ to table4 ,my n]ves 7 9 
su* a /ate t ,i %riek$ at ! fir/ crack (
 ! coa*man's :ip2 & ! company came runn+
 d[n aga9 to "k :at 0 ! matt]4 ,"o ( my 
s]vants clev]ly /opp$ !m f all hurry+   
out to ! c>riage toge!r1 by decl>+ t !  
scream proce$$ f my adopt$ orphan4 ,^u  
?is !y return$ quietly en\gh to _! w9e1 
& ,i drove (f ) my g5]al confession to !
 vic> ( ,sa9t ,sulpice4  ,my int]view ) 
! vic> la/$ ?ree h\rs4 ,8 joy at        
discov]+ t ,i 0 9 a /ate ( grace 0      
extreme4 ,my own emotions 7 q           
indescribable4 ,late at night ,i return$
 to my own h\se1 & f\nd my gue/s all    
gone4 ,i employ$ myself 9 writ+ f>ewell 
lett]s to ! manag] & company ( ! !atre1 
& 9 mak+ ! necess>y arrangem5ts = s5d+  
back my adopt$ orphan to 8 fri5ds1 )    
tw5ty pi/oles4 ,f9ally1 ,i direct$ !    

s]vants to say1 if anybody enquir$ aft] 
me ! next day1 t ,i _h gone out ( t[n = 
"s "t2 & aft] t1 at five o'clock 9 !    
morn+1 ,i left my home 9 ,p>is nev] to  
return to x aga94  ,by ?is "t ,i _h     
?or\ghly recov]$ my tranquillity4 ,i 0 z
 easy 9 my m9d at leav+ my h\se z ,i am 
n[ :5 ,i quit my cell to s+ 9 ! *oir4   
,su* already 0 ! happy result ( my      
p]petual masses1 my g5]al confession1 & 
my ?ree h\rs' int]view ) ! vic> ( ,sa9t 
,sulpice4  ,be=e tak+ leave ( ! _w1 ,i  
w5t to ,v]sailles to say good-bye to my 
wor?y patrons1 ,c>d9al ,fleury & ! ,duke
 de ,gesvres4 ,f !m1 ,i w5t to mass 9 ! 
,k+'s ,*apel2 & aft] t1 ,i call$ on a   
lady ( ,v]sailles :om ,i _h mortally    
(f5d$1 = ! purpose ( mak+ my peace ) h]4
 ,%e receiv$ me angrily en\gh4 ,i told  
h] ,i _h n come to ju/ify myself1 b to  
ask h] p>don4 ,if %e grant$ x1 %e w\ld  
s5d me away happy4 ,if %e decl9$ to be  
reconcil$1 ,provid5ce w\ld probably be  
satisfi$ ) my submission1 b c]ta9ly n ) 
h] refusal4 ,%e felt ! =ce ( ?is        

argum5t2 & we made x up on ! spot4  ,i  
left ,v]sailles imm$iately aft]w>ds1 )\t
 tak+ any?+ to eat2 ! act ( humility :i*
 ,i _h j p]=m$ be+ z good z a meal to   
me4  ,t[>ds ev5+1 ,i ent]$ ! h\se ( !   
,community ( ,sa9t ,p]petua at ,p>is4 ,i
 _h ord]$ a little room to be furni%$   
!re = me1 until ! inv5tory ( my worldly 
effects 0 complet$1 & until ,i c\ld     
conclude my arrangem5ts = ent]+ a       
conv5t4 ,on fir/ in/all+ myself1 ,i     
began to feel hungry at la/1 & begg$ !  
,sup]ior ( ! ,community to give me =    
supp] any?+ t rema9$ f ! d9n] ( ! h\se4 
,!y _h no?+ b a little /ew$ c>p1 ( :i*  
,i eat ) an excell5t appetite4 ,m>vell\s
 to relate1 al?\gh ,i _h be5 able to    
keep no?+ on my /oma* = ! pa/ ?ree      
mon?s1 al?\gh ,i _h be5 dreadfully sick 
aft] a little rice s\p on ! ev5+ be=e1 !
 /ew$ c>p ( ! si/]hood ( ,sa9t ,p]petua1
 ) "s nuts aft]w>ds = dess]t1 agre$ ) me
 *>m+ly1 & ,i slept all ?r\gh ! night   
aft]w>ds z peacefully z a *ild6  ,:5 !  
news ( my retirem5t became public1 x    

occasion$ great talk 9 ,p>is4 ,v>i\s p  
assign$ v>i\s reasons = ! /range c\rse t
 ,i _h tak54 ,nobody1 h[ev]1 believ$ t  
,i _h quitt$ ! _w 9 ! prime ( my life   
7,i 0 !n ?irty-"o ye>s old71 nev] to    
return to x aga94 ,mean:ile1 my inv5tory
 0 f9i%$ & my goods 7 sold4 ,"o ( my    
fri5ds s5t a lett]1 entreat+ me to      
reconsid] my det]m9ation4 ,my m9d 0 made
 up1 & ,i wrote to say s4 ,:5 my goods  
_h be5 all sold1 ,i left ,p>is to g &   
live incognito z a p>l\r-bo>d] 9 !      
,conv5t ( ! ,ursul9e nuns ( ,pondevaux4 
,"h ,i wi%$ to try ! mode ( life = a    
little :ile be=e ,i assum$ ! s]i\s      
responsibility ( tak+ ! veil4 ,i knew my
 own "*--,i rememb]$ my e>ly horror (   
total seclusion1 & my invet]ate dislike 
to ! company ( wom5 only2 &1 mov$ by ^! 
consid]ations1 ,i resolv$1 n[ t ,i _h   
tak5 ! fir/ important /ep1 to proce$ 9 !
 future ) caution4  ,! nuns ( ,pondevaux
 receiv$ me among !m ) great k9dness4   
,!y gave me a l>ge room1 :i* ,i         
p>tition$ (f into ?ree small ones4 ,i   

assi/$ at all ! pi\s ex]cises ( ! place4
 ,deceiv$ by my fa%ionable appe>ance &  
my plump figure1 ! good nuns treat$ me z
 if ,i 0 a p]son ( high di/9ction4 ,?is 
afflict$ me1 & ,i undeceiv$ !m4 ,:5 !y  
knew :o ,i really 01 !y only behav$     
t[>ds me ) /ill great] k9dness4 ,i pass$
 my "t 9 read+ & pray+1 & l$ ! quiete/1 
sweete/ life x is possible to conceive4 
,aft] t5 mon?s' soj\rn at ,pondevaux1 ,i
 w5t to ,lyons1 & ent]$ 7/ill z         
p>l\r-bo>d] only7 ! ,h\se ( ,anticaille1
 occupi$ by ! nuns ( ! ,ord] ( ,sa9t    
,m>y4 ,"h1 ,i enjoy$ ! advantage ( hav+ 
= director ( my consci5ce t holy man1   
,fa!r ,deveaux4 ,he belong$ to ! ,ord] (
 ! ,jesuits2 & he 0 good en\gh1 :5 ,i   
fir/ ask$ him = advice1 to sugge/ t ,i  
%\ld get up at elev5 o'clock at night to
 say my pray]s1 & %\ld rema9 absorb$ 9  
devotion until midnight4 ,9 ob$i5ce to !
 directions ( ?is sa9tly p]son1 ,i kept 
myself awake z well z ,i c\ld till elev5
 o'clock4 ,i !n got on my knees ) great 
f]v\r1 & ,i blu% to confess x1          

imm$iately fell z fa/ asleep z a        
dorm\se4 ,?is w5t on = sev]al nights1 :5
 ,fa!r ,deveaux f9d+ t my midnight      
devotions 7 r too mu* = me1 0 s oblig+ z
 to prescribe ano!r species ( pi\s      
ex]cise1 9 a lett] :i* he wrote to me ) 
8 own h&4 ,! holy fa!r1 aft] deeply     
regrett+ my inability to keep awake1    
in=m$ me t he _h a new act ( p5it5ce to 
sugge/ to me by ! p]=mance ( :i* ,i     
might /ill hope to expiate my s9s4 ,he  
!n1 9 ! pla9e/ t]ms1 advis$ me to h     
rec\rse to ! discipl9e ( flagellation1 e
 ,friday1 us+ ! cat-o'-n9e-tails on my  
b>e %\ld]s = ! l5g? ( "t t x w\ld take  
to repeat a ,mis]]e4 ,9 conclusion1 he  
in=m$ me t ! nuns ( ,anticaille w\ld    
probably l5d me ! necess>y in/rum5t (   
flagellation2 b1 if !y made any         
difficulty ab\t x1 he 0 b5evol5tly ready
 to furni% me ) a new & special         
cat-o'-n9e-tails ( 8 own mak+4  ,nev] 0 
woman m amaz$ or m angry ?an ,i1 :5 ,i  
fir/ read ?is lett]4 ,:at6 cri$ ,i to   
myself1 does ?is man s]i\sly recomm5d me

 to la% my own %\ld]s8 ,j ,heav51 :at   
imp]t95ce6 ,& yet1 is x n my duty to put
 up ) x8 ,does n ?is app>5t insol5ce    
proce$ f ! p5 ( a holy man8 ,if he tells
 me to flog my wick$ness out ( me1 is x 
n my b\nd5 duty to lay on ! sc\rge ) all
 my might imm$iately8 ,s9n] t ,i am6 ,i 
am ?9k+ remorsefully ( my plump %\ld]s &
 ! dimples on my back1 :5 ,i ought to be
 ?9k+ ( no?+ b ! cat-o'-n9e-tails &     
ob$i5ce to ,fa!r ,deveaux8  ,^!         
reflections soon gave me ! resolution   
:i* ,i _h want$ at fir/4 ,i 0 a%am$ to  
ask ! nuns = an in/rum5t ( flagellation2
 s ,i made "o = myself ( /\t cord1      
pitilessly knott$ at v %ort int]vals4   
,?is done1 ,i %ut myself up :ile ! nuns 
7 at pray]1 uncov]$ my %\ld]s1 & ra9$   
su* a %[] ( la%es on !m1 9 ! fir/ f]v\r 
( my newly-awak5$ zeal1 t ,i fairly     
flogg$ myself d[n on ! gr\nd1 flat on my
 nose1 be=e ,i _h repeat$ m ( ! ,mis]]e 
?an ! fir/ two or ?ree l9es4  ,i bur/   
out cry+1 %$d+ te>s ( spite aga9/ myself
 :5 ,i ought to h be5 %$d+ te>s (       

devotional gratitude = ! k9dness ( ,fa!r
 ,deveaux4 ,all ?r\gh ! night ,i nev]   
clos$ my eyes1 & 9 ! morn+ ,i f\nd my   
poor %\ld]s 7once s g5]ally admir$ = _! 
:it5ess7 /rip$ ) all ! col\rs ( ! ra9b[4
 ,! sight ?rew me into a passion1 & ,i  
pr(anely said to myself :ile ,i 0       
dress+1 ,! next "t ,i see ,fa!r         
,deveaux1 ,i w give my tongue full sw+1 
& make ! hair ( t holy man /& on end )  
t]ror6 ,a few h\rs aft]w>ds1 he came to 
! conv5t1 & all my resolution melt$ away
 at ! sight ( him4 ,8 impos+ ext]ior _h 
su* an effect on me t ,i c\ld only      
humbly entreat him to excuse me f       
indict+ a second flagellation on myself4
 ,he smil$1 b5ignantly1 & grant$ my     
reque/ ) a sa9tly amiability4 ,give me !
 cat-o'-n9e-tails1 he said1 9           
conclusion1 & ,i w keep x = y till y ask
 me = x aga94 ,y are sure to ask = x    
aga91 de> *ild--to ask = x on y\r b5d$  
knees6  ,pi\s & prophetic man6 ,be=e _m 
days _h pass$ 8 words came true4 ,if he 
_h p]si/$ sev]ely 9 ord]+ me to flog    

myself1 ,i might h oppos$ him = mon?s   
toge!r2 b1 z x 01 :o c\ld resi/ !       
amiable indulg5ce he %[$ t[>ds my       
weakness8 ,! v next day aft] my         
int]view1 ,i began to feel a%am$ ( my   
own c[>dice2 & ! day aft] t ,i w5t d[n  
on my knees1 exactly z he _h pr$ict$1 & 
said1 ,fa!r ,deveaux1 give me back my   
cat-o'-n9e-tails4 ,f t "t ,i *e]fully   
und]w5t ! discipl9e ( flagellation1     
le>n+ ! regul> me?od ( practis+ x f !   
si/]hood1 & feel+1 9 a spiritual po9t ( 
view1 imm5sely ! bett] = x4  ,! nuns1   
f9d+ t ,i *e]fully devot$ myself to e   
act ( self-sacrifice prescrib$ by !     
rules ( _! conv5t1 wond]$ v mu* t ,i    
/ill hesitat$ ab\t tak+ ! veil4 ,i begg$
 !m n to m5tion ! subject to me till my 
m9d 0 q made up ab\t x4 ,!y respect$ my 
wi%1 & said no m2 b !y l5t me books to  
read :i* assi/$ 9 /r5g!n+ my wav]+      
resolution4 ,among ^! books 0 ! ,life ( 
,madame de ,montmor5ci1 :o1 aft] ! %ock+
 dea? ( h] husb&1 ent]$ ! ,ord] ( ,/4   
,m>y4 ,! great example ( ?is lady made  

me reflect s]i\sly1 & ,i communicat$ my 
?\ghts1 z a matt] ( c\rse1 to ,fa!r     
,deveaux4 ,he assur$ me t ! "o la/      
greate/ sacrifice :i* rema9$ = me to    
make 0 ! sacrifice ( my lib]ty4 ,i _h   
long kn[n t ?is 0 my duty1 & ,i n[ felt1
 = ! fir/ "t1 t ,i _h c\rage &          
resolution en\gh boldly to face ! idea (
 tak+ ! veil4  ,:ile ,i 0 9 ?is happy   
frame ( m9d1 ,i happ5$ to meet ) !      
hi/ory ( ! fam\s ,ranc1 f\nd]1 or r     
re=m]1 ( ! ,ord] ( ,la ,trappe4 ,i f\nd 
a /range simil>ity betwe5 my own worldly
 errors & ^? ( ?is illu/ri\s p5it5t4 ,! 
discov]y _h su* an effect on me1 t ,i   
spurn$ all idea ( ent]+ a conv5t :]e !  
rules 7 comp>atively easy1 z 0 ! case at
 ,anticaille1 & det]m9$1 :5 ,i did take 
! veil1 to ent] an ,ord] ^: discipl9e 0 
z sev]e z ! discipl9e ( ,la ,trappe     
itself4 ,fa!r ,deveaux in=m$ me t ,i    
%\ld f9d exactly :at ,i want$ among !   
,c>melite nuns2 &1 by 8 advice1 ,i      
imm$iately put myself 9 communication ) 
! ,ar*bi%op ( ,vill]oi4 ,i op5$ my he>t 

to ?is wor?y prelate1 conv9c$ him ( my  
s9c]ity1 & ga9$ f him a promise t he    
w\ld get me admitt$ among ! ,c>melite   
nuns ( ,lyons4 ,"o ?+ ,i begg$ ( him at 
p>t+1 :i* 01 t he w\ld tell ! :ole tru? 
ab\t my =m] life & ab\t ! pr(ession t ,i
 _h ex]cis$ 9 ! _w4 ,i 0 resolv$ to     
deceive nobody1 & to ent] no conv5t "u  
false pret5ces ( any sort4  ,my wi%es 7 
scrupul\sly fulfill$2 & ! nuns 7        
dreadfully fright5$ :5 !y he>d t ,i _h  
be5 an actress at ,p>is4 ,b ! ,ar*bi%op 
promis+ to answ] = me1 & to take all _! 
scruples on 8 own consci5ce1 !y cons5t$ 
to receive me4 ,i c\ld n tru/ myself to 
take =mal leave ( ! nuns ( ,anticaille1 
:o _h be5 s k9d to me1 & t[>ds :om ,i   
felt s gratefully4 ,s ,i wrote my       
f>ewell to !m aft] privately leav+ _!   
h\se1 tell+ !m frankly ! motives :i*    
animat$ me1 & ask+ _! p>don = sep>at+   
myself f !m 9 secret4  ,on ! f\rte5? (  
,octob]1 sev5te5 hundr$ & tw5ty-f\r1 ,i 
ent]$ ! ,c>melite conv5t at ,lyons1     
eighte5 mon?s aft] my flight f ! _w1 &  

my ab&onm5t ( my pr(ession--to adopt    
:i*1 ,i may say1 9 my own def5ce1 t ,i 0
 fir/ l$ ?r\gh %e] pov]ty4 ,at ! age (  
sev5te5 ye>s1 & possess+ 7if ,i may     
cr$it report7 rem>kable p]sonal *>ms1 ,i
 0 left p]fectly de/itute ?r\gh !       
sp5d?rift habits ( my fa!r4 ,i 0 easily 
p]suad$ to g on ! /age1 & soon tempt$1 )
 my y\? & inexp]i5ce1 to lead an        
irregul> life4 ,i d n wi% to ass]t t    
dissipation necess>ily foll[s ! *oice ( 
! actress's pr(ession1 = ,i h kn[n _m   
e/imable wom5 on ! /age4 ,i1 unhappily1 
0 n "o ( ! numb]4 ,i confess x to my    
%ame1 &1 z ! *ief ( s9n]s1 ,i am only ! 
m grateful to ! m]cy ( ,heav5 :i*       
accompli%$ my conv]sion4  ,:5 ,i ent]$ !
 conv5t1 ,i entreat$ ! prioress to let  
me live 9 p]fect obscurity1 )\t         
correspond+ ) my fri5ds1 or ev5 ) my    
relations4 ,%e decl9$ to grant ?is la/  
reque/1 ?9k+ t my zeal 0 lead+ me too   
f>4 ,on ! o!r h&1 %e compli$ ) my wi% to
 be employ$ at once1 )\t ! slighte/     
prep>atory indulg5ce or consid]ation1 on

 any m5ial lab\r :i* ! discipl9e ( !    
conv5t might require f me4 ,on ! fir/   
day ( my admission a broom 0 put into my
 h&s4 ,i 0 appo9t$ also to wa% up !     
di%es1 to sc\r ! saucepans1 to draw wat]
 f a deep well1 to c>ry ea* si/]'s pit*]
 to its prop] place1 & to scrub ! tables
 9 ! refectory4 ,f ^! occupations ,i got
 on 9 "t to mak+ rope %oes = ! si/]hood1
 & to tak+ c>e ( ! great clock ( !      
conv5t2 ?is la/ employm5t requir+ me to 
pull up ?ree imm5sely heavy weights     
regul>ly e day4 ,sev5 ye>s ( my life    
pass$ 9 ?is h>d "w1 & ,i c hone/ly say t
 ,i nev] murmur$ ov] x4  ,to return1    
h[ev]1 to ! p]iod ( my admission into ! 
conv5t4  ,aft] ?ree mon?s ( probation1  
,i took ! veil on ! tw5tie? ( ,janu>y1  
sev5te5 hundr$ & tw5ty-five4 ,!         
,ar*bi%op did me ! hon\r to preside at !
 c]emony2 &1 9 spite ( ! rig\r ( !      
season1 all ,lyons p\r$ into ! *ur* to  
see me take ! v[s4 ,i 0 deeply affect$2 
b ,i nev] falt]$ 9 my resolution4 ,i    
pron\nc$ ! oa?s ) a firm voice1 & ) a   

tranquillity :i* a/oni%$ all !          
spectators1--a tranquillity :i* has nev]
 once fail$ me s9ce t "t4  ,su* is !    
/ory ( my conv]sion4 ,provid5ce s5t me  
into ! _w ) an excell5t nature1 ) a true
 he>t1 ) a rem>kable susceptibility to !
 influ5ce ( e/imable s5tim5ts4 ,my p>5ts
 neglect$ my education1 & left me 9 !   
_w1 de/itute ( ev]y?+ b y\?1 beauty1 & a
 lively temp]am5t4 ,i tri$ h>d to be    
virtu\s2 ,i v[$1 be=e ,i 0 out ( my     
te5s1 & :5 ,i happ5$ to be /ruck d[n by 
a s]i\s illness1 to leave ! /age1 & to  
keep my reputation unblemi%$1 if anybody
 w\ld only give me two hundr$ livres a  
ye> to live ^u4 ,nobody came =w>d to    
help me1 & ,i fell4  ,heav5 p>don ! ri* 
p ( ,p>is :o might h pres]v$ my virtue  
at s small a co/6 ,heav5 grant me c\rage
 to foll[ ! bett] pa? into :i* its m]cy 
has l$ me1 & to p]sev]e 9 a life (      
p5it5ce & devotion to ! end ( my days6  
,s ?is s+ul> confession ends4 ,besides !
 little vanities & levities :i* appe> "h
 & !re on its surface1 !re is surely a  

/rong "u-curr5t ( s9c]ity & frankness   
:i* fit x to appeal 9 "s degree to !    
sympa?y z well z ! curiosity ( ! read]4 
,x is impossible to read ! n>rative )\t 
feel+ t !re mu/ h be5 some?+ really     
g5u9e & he>ty 9 ,mademoiselle ,gauti]'s 
nature2 & x is a gratify+ pro( ( ! hone/
 integrity ( h] purpose to "k t %e      
p]sev]$ to ! la/ 9 ! life ( humility &  
seclusion :i* h] consci5ce _h conv9c$ h]
 0 ! be/ life t %e c\ld lead4 ,p]sons :o
 knew h] 9 ! ,c>melite conv5t1 report t 
%e liv$ & di$ 9 x1 pres]v+ to ! la/1 all
 ! bett] "p ( ! y\?ful livel9ess ( h]   
"*4 ,%e always receiv$ visitors )       
pleasure1 always talk$ to !m ) surpris+ 
*e]fulness1 always assi/$ ! poor1 &     
always will+ly wrote lett]s to h] =m]   
patrons 9 ,p>is to help ! int]e/s ( h]  
ne$y fri5ds4 ,t[>ds ! end ( h] life1 %e 
0 afflict$ ) bl9dness2 b %e 0 a tr\ble  
to no "o 9 consequ5ce ( ?is affliction1 
= %e cont9u$1 9 spite ( x1 to clean h]  
own cell1 to make h] own b$1 & to cook  
h] own food j z usual4 ,"o little       

*>act]i/ic vanity--h>mless en\gh1       
surely8--rema9$ ) h] to ! la/4 ,%e nev] 
=got h] own h&some face1 :i* all ,p>is  
_h admir$ 9 ! by-gone "t2 & %e contriv$ 
to get a disp5sation f ! ,pope :i* all[$
 h] to receive visitors 9 ! conv5t p>l\r
 )\t a veil4