,a ,,book ,,of ,,strife ,,in ,,the ,,form ,,of ,,the ,,diary ,,of ,,an ,,old ,,soul by ,george ,mac,donald ,published in #ahhj4 ,the dedication refers to the fact that the book was originally published using only the right-hand side pages of the book1 leaving the left-hand side blank to allow for and acknowledge any thoughtful reader responses4 ,,jb ,,dedication ,sweet friends1 receive my offering4 ,you will find ,against each worded page a white page set3-- ,this is the mirror of each friendly mind ,reflecting that4 ,in this book we are met4 ,make it1 dear hearts1 of worth to you indeed3-- ,let your white page be ground1 my print be seed1 ,growing to golden ears1 that faith and hope shall feed4 ,,your ,,old ,,soul ,,the ,,diary ,,of ,,an ,,old ,,soul4 ,,january4 #a4 ,,lord1 what ,i once had done with youthful might1 ,had ,i been from the first true to the truth1 ,grant me1 now old1 to do--with better sight1 ,and humbler heart1 if not the brain of youth2 ,so wilt thou1 in thy gentleness and ruth1 ,lead back thy old soul1 by the path of pain1 ,round to his best--young eyes and heart and brain4 #b4 ,a dim aurora rises in my east1 ,beyond the line of jagged questions hoar1 ,as if the head of our intombed ,high ,priest ,began to glow behind the unopened door3 ,sure the gold wings will soon rise from the gray6-- ,they rise not4 ,up ,i rise1 press on the more1 ,to meet the slow coming of the ,master's day4 #c4 ,sometimes ,i wake1 and1 lo6 ,i have forgot1 ,and drifted out upon an ebbing sea6 ,my soul that was at rest now resteth not1 ,for ,i am with myself and not with thee2 ,truth seems a blind moon in a glaring morn1 ,where nothing is but sick-heart vanity3 ,oh1 thou who knowest6 save thy child forlorn4 #d4 ,death1 like high faith1 levelling1 lifteth all4 ,when ,i awake1 my daughter and my son1 ,grown sister and brother1 in my arms shall fall1 ,tenfold my girl and boy4 ,sure every one ,of all the brood to the old wings will run4 ,whole-hearted is my worship of the man ,from whom my earthly history began4 #e4 ,thy fishes breathe but where thy waters roll2 ,thy birds fly but within thy airy sea2 ,my soul breathes only in thy infinite soul2 ,i breathe1 ,i think1 ,i love1 ,i live but thee4 ,oh breathe1 oh think1--,o ,love1 live into me2 ,unworthy is my life till all divine1 ,till thou see in me only what is thine4 #f4 ,then shall ,i breathe in sweetest sharing1 then ,think in harmonious consort with my kin2 ,then shall ,i love well all my father's men1 ,feel one with theirs the life my heart within4 ,oh brothers6 sisters holy6 hearts divine6 ,then ,i shall be all yours1 and nothing mine-- ,to every human heart a mother-twin4 #g4 ,i see a child before an empty house1 ,knocking and knocking at the closed door2 ,he wakes dull echoes--but nor man nor mouse1 ,if he stood knocking there for evermore4-- ,a mother angel1 see6 folding each wing1 ,soft-walking1 crosses straight the empty floor1 ,and opens to the obstinate praying thing4 #h4 ,were there but some deep1 holy spell1 whereby ,always ,i should remember thee--some mode ,of feeling the pure heat-throb momently ,of the spirit-fire still uttering this ,i6-- ,lord1 see thou to it1 take thou remembrance' load3 ,only when ,i bethink me can ,i cry2 ,remember thou1 and prick me with love's goad4 #i4 ,if to myself--,god sometimes interferes-- ,i said1 my faith at once would be struck blind4 ,i see him all in all1 the lifing mind1 ,or nowhere in the vacant miles and years4 ,a love he is that watches and that hears1 ,or but a mist fumed up from minds of men1 ,whose fear and hope reach out beyond their ken4 #aj4 ,when ,i no more can stir my soul to move1 ,and life is but the ashes of a fire2 ,when ,i can but remember that my heart ,once used to live and love1 long and aspire1-- ,oh1 be thou then the first1 the one thou art2 ,be thou the calling1 before all answering love1 ,and in me wake hope1 fear1 boundless desire4 #aa4 ,i thought that ,i had lost thee2 but1 behold6 ,thou comest to me from the horizon low1 ,across the fields outspread of green and gold-- ,fair carpet for thy feet to come and go4 ,whence ,i know not1 or how to me thou art come6-- ,not less my spirit with calm bliss doth glow1 ,meeting thee only thus1 in nature vague and dumb4 #ab4 ,doubt swells and surges1 with swelling doubt behind6 ,my soul in storm is but a tattered sail1 ,streaming its ribbons on the torrent gale2 ,in calm1 'tis but a limp and flapping thing3 ,oh6 swell it with thy breath2 make it a wing1-- ,to sweep through thee the ocean1 with thee the wind ,nor rest until in thee its haven it shall find4 #ac4 ,the idle flapping of the sail is doubt2 ,faith swells it full to breast the breasting seas4 ,bold1 conscience1 fast1 and rule the ruling helm2 ,hell's freezing north no tempest can send out1 ,but it shall toss thee homeward to thy leas2 ,boisterous wave-crest never shall o'erwhelm ,thy sea-float bark as safe as field-borne rooted elm4 #ad4 ,sometimes1 hard-trying1 it seems ,i cannot pray-- ,for doubt1 and pain1 and anger1 and all strife4 ,yet some poor half-fledged prayer-bird from the nest ,may fall1 flit1 fly1 perch--crouch in the bowery breast ,of the large1 nation-healing tree of life2-- ,moveless there sit through all the burning day1 ,and on my heart at night a fresh leaf cooling lay4 #ae4 ,my harvest withers4 ,health1 my means to live-- ,all things seem rushing straight into the dark4 ,but the dark still is ,god4 ,i would not give ,the smallest silver-piece to turn the rush ,backward or sideways4 ,am ,i not a spark ,of him who is the light8--,fair hope doth flush ,my east4--,divine success--,oh1 hush and hark6 #af4 ,thy will be done4 ,i yield up everything4 ,the life is more than meat--then more than health2 ,the body more than raiment--then than wealth2 ,the hairs ,i made not1 thou art numbering4 ,thou art my life--,i the brook1 thou the spring4 ,because thine eyes are open1 ,i can see2 ,because thou art thyself1 'tis therefore ,i am me4 #ag4 ,no sickness can come near to blast my health2 ,my life depends not upon any meat2 ,my bread comes not from any human tilth2 ,no wings will grow upon my changeless wealth2 ,wrong cannot touch it1 violence or deceit2 ,thou art my life1 my health1 my bank1 my barn-- ,and from all other gods thou plain dost warn4 #ah4 ,care thou for mine whom ,i must leave behind2 ,care that they know who 'tis for them takes care2 ,thy present patience help them still to bear2 ,lord1 keep them clearing1 growing1 heart and mind2 ,in one thy oneness us together bind2 ,last earthly prayer with which to thee ,i cling-- ,grant that1 save love1 we owe not anything4 #ai4 ',tis well1 for unembodied thought a live1 ,true house to build--of stubble1 wood1 nor hay2 ,so1 like bees round the flower by which they thrive1 ,my thoughts are busy with the informing truth1 ,and as ,i build1 ,i feed1 and grow in youth-- ,hoping to stand fresh1 clean1 and strong1 and gay1 ,when up the east comes dawning ,his great day4 #bj4 ,thy will is truth--'tis therefore fate1 the strong4 ,would that my will did sweep full swing with thine6 ,then harmony with every spheric song1 ,and conscious power1 would give sureness divine4 ,who thinks to thread thy great laws' onward throng1 ,is as a fly that creeps his foolish way ,athwart an engine's wheels in smooth resistless play4 #ba4 ,thou in my heart hast planted1 gardener divine1 ,a scion of the tree of life3 it grows2 ,but not in every wind or weather it blows2 ,the leaves fall sometimes from the baby tree1 ,and the life-power seems melting into pine2 ,yet still the sap keeps struggling to the shine1 ,and the unseen root clings cramplike unto thee4 #bb4 ,do thou1 my ,god1 my spirit's weather control2 ,and as ,i do not gloom though the day be dun1 ,let me not gloom when earth-born vapours roll ,across the infinite zenith of my soul4 ,should sudden brain-frost through the heart's summer run1 ,cold1 weary1 joyless1 waste of air and sun1 ,thou art my south1 my summer-wind1 my all1 my one4 #bc4 ,o ,life1 why dost thou close me up in death8 ,o ,health1 why make me inhabit heaviness8-- ,i ask1 yet know3 the sum of this distress1 ,pang-haunted body1 sore-dismayed mind1 ,is but the egg that rounds the winged faith2 ,when that its path into the air shall find1 ,my heart will follow1 high above cold1 rain1 and wind4 #bd4 ,i can no more than lift my weary eyes2 ,therefore ,i lift my weary eyes--no more4 ,but my eyes pull my heart1 and that1 before ',tis well awake1 knocks where the conscience lies2 ,conscience runs quick to the spirit's hidden door3 ,straightway1 from every sky-ward window1 cries ,up to the ,father's listening ears arise4 #be4 ,not in my fancy now ,i search to find thee2 ,not in its loftiest forms would shape or bind thee2 ,i cry to one whom ,i can never know1 ,filling me with an infinite overflow2 ,not to a shape that dwells within my heart1 ,clothed in perfections love and truth assigned thee1 ,but to the ,god thou knowest that thou art4 #bf4 ,not1 ,lord1 because ,i have done well or ill2 ,not that my mind looks up to thee clear-eyed2 ,not that it struggles in fast cerements tied2 ,not that ,i need thee daily sorer still2 ,not that ,i wretched1 wander from thy will2 ,not now for any cause to thee ,i cry1 ,but this1 that thou art thou1 and here am ,i4 #bg4 ,yestereve1 ,death came1 and knocked at my thin door4 ,i from my window looked3 the thing ,i saw1 ,the shape uncouth1 ,i had not seen before4 ,i was disturbed--with fear1 in sooth1 not awe2 ,whereof ashamed1 ,i instantly did rouse ,my will to seek thee--only to fear the more3 ,alas6 ,i could not find thee in the house4 #bh4 ,i was like ,peter when he began to sink4 ,to thee a new prayer therefore ,i have got-- ,that1 when ,death comes in earnest to my door1 ,thou wouldst thyself go1 when the latch doth clink1 ,and lead him to my room1 up to my cot2 ,then hold thy child's hand1 hold and leave him not1 ,till ,death has done with him for evermore4 #bi4 ,till ,death has done with him8--,ah1 leave me then6 ,and ,death has done with me1 oh1 nevermore6 ,he comes--and goes--to leave me in thy arms1 ,nearer thy heart1 oh1 nearer than before6 ,to lay thy child1 naked1 new-born again ,of mother earth1 crept free through many harms1 ,upon thy bosom--still to the very core4 #cj4 ,come to me1 ,lord3 ,i will not speculate how1 ,nor think at which door ,i would have thee appear1 ,nor put off calling till my floors be swept1 ,but cry1 ,come1 ,lord1 come any way1 come now4 ,doors1 windows1 ,i throw wide2 my head ,i bow1 ,and sit like some one who so long has slept ,that he knows nothing till his life draw near4 #ca4 ,o ,lord1 ,i have been talking to the people2 ,thought's wheels have round me whirled a fiery zone1 ,and the recoil of my words' airy ripple ,my heart unheedful has puffed up and blown4 ,therefore ,i cast myself before thee prone3 ,lay cool hands on my burning brain1 and press ,from my weak heart the swelling emptiness4 ,,february4 #a4 ,i ,,to myself have neither power nor worth1 ,patience nor love1 nor anything right good2 ,my soul is a poor land1 plenteous in dearth-- ,here blades of grass1 there a small herb for food-- ,a nothing that would be something if it could2 ,but if obedience1 ,lord1 in me do grow1 ,i shall one day be better than ,i know4 #b4 ,the worst power of an evil mood is this-- ,it makes the bastard self seem in the right1 ,self1 self the end1 the goal of human bliss4 ,but if the ,christ-self in us be the might ,of saving ,god1 why should ,i spend my force ,with a dark thing to reason of the light-- ,not push it rough aside1 and hold obedient course8 #c4 ,back still it comes to this3 there was a man ,who said1 ,i am the truth1 the life1 the way3-- ,shall ,i pass on1 or shall ,i stop and hear8-- ,come to the ,father but by me none can3 ,what then is this8--am ,i not also one ,of those who live in fatherless dismay8 ,i stand1 ,i look1 ,i listen1 ,i draw near4 #d4 ,my ,lord1 ,i find that nothing else will do1 ,but follow where thou goest1 sit at thy feet1 ,and where ,i have thee not1 still run to meet4 ,roses are scentless1 hopeless are the morns1 ,rest is but weakness1 laughter crackling thorns1 ,if thou1 the ,truth1 do not make them the true3 ,thou art my life1 ,o ,christ1 and nothing else will do4 #e4 ,thou art here--in heaven1 ,i know1 but not from here-- ,although thy separate self do not appear2 ,if ,i could part the light from out the day1 ,there ,i should have thee6 ,but thou art too near3 ,how find thee walking1 when thou art the way8 ,oh1 present ,christ6 make my eyes keen as stings1 ,to see thee at their heart1 the glory even of things4 #f4 ,that thou art nowhere to be found1 agree ,wise men1 whose eyes are but for surfaces2 ,men with eyes opened by the second birth1 ,to whom the seen1 husk of the unseen is1 ,descry thee soul of everything on earth4 ,who know thy ends1 thy means and motions see3 ,eyes made for glory soon discover thee4 #g4 ,thou near then1 ,i draw nearer--to thy feet1 ,and sitting in thy shadow1 look out on the shine2 ,ready at thy first word to leave my seat-- ,not thee3 thou goest too4 ,from every clod ,into thy footprint flows the indwelling wine2 ,and in my daily bread1 keen-eyed ,i greet ,its being's heart1 the very body of ,god4 #h4 ,thou wilt interpret life to me1 and men1 ,art1 nature1 yea1 my own soul's mysteries-- ,bringing1 truth out1 clear-joyous1 to my ken1 ,fair as the morn trampling the dull night4 ,then ,the lone hill-side shall hear exultant cries2 ,the joyous see me joy1 the weeping weep2 ,the watching smile1 as ,death breathes on me his cold sleep4 #i4 ,i search my heart--,i search1 and find no faith4 ,hidden ,he may be in its many folds-- ,i see him not revealed in all the world ,duty's firm shape thins to a misty wraith4 ,no good seems likely4 ,to and fro ,i am hurled4 ,i have no stay4 ,only obedience holds3-- ,i haste1 ,i rise1 ,i do the thing he saith4 #aj4 ,thou wouldst not have thy man crushed back to clay2 ,it must be1 ,god1 thou hast a strength to give ,to him that fain would do what thou dost say2 ,else how shall any soul repentant live1 ,old griefs and new fears hurrying on dismay8 ,let pain be what thou wilt1 kind and degree1 ,only in pain calm thou my heart with thee4 #aa4 ,i will not shift my ground like ,moab's king1 ,but from this spot whereon ,i stand1 ,i pray-- ,from this same barren rock to thee ,i say1 ,lord1 in my commonness1 in this very thing ,that haunts my soul with folly--through the clay ,of this my pitcher1 see the lamp's dim flake2 ,and hear the blow that would the pitcher break4 #ab4 ,be thou the well by which ,i lie and rest2 ,be thou my tree of life1 my garden ground2 ,be thou my home1 my fire1 my chamber blest1 ,my book of wisdom1 loved of all the best2 ,oh1 be my friend1 each day still newer found1 ,as the eternal days and nights go round6 ,nay1 nay--thou art my ,god1 in whom all loves are bound6 #ac4 ,two things at once1 thou know'st ,i cannot think4 ,when busy with the work thou givest me1 ,i cannot consciously think then of thee4 ,then why1 when next thou lookest o'er the brink ,of my horizon1 should my spirit shrink1 ,reproached and fearful1 nor to greet thee run8 ,can ,i be two when ,i am only one4 #ad4 ,my soul must unawares have sunk awry4 ,some care1 poor eagerness1 ambition of work1 ,some old offence that unforgiving did lurk1 ,or some self-gratulation1 soft and sly-- ,something not thy sweet will1 not the good part1 ,while the home-guard looked out1 stirred up the old murk1 ,and so ,i gloomed away from thee1 my ,heart4 #ae4 ,therefore ,i make provision1 ere ,i begin ,to do the thing thou givest me to do1 ,praying1--,lord1 wake me oftener1 lest ,i sin4 ,amidst my work1 open thine eyes on me1 ,that ,i may wake and laugh1 and know and see ,then with healed heart afresh catch up the clue1 ,and singing drop into my work anew4 #af4 ,if ,i should slow diverge1 and listless stray ,into some thought1 feeling1 or dream unright1 ,o ,watcher1 my backsliding soul affray2 ,let me not perish of the ghastly blight4 ,be thou1 ,o ,life eternal1 in me light2 ,then merest approach of selfish or impure ,shall start me up alive1 awake1 secure4 #ag4 ,lord1 ,i have fallen again--a human clod6 ,selfish ,i was1 and heedless to offend2 ,stood on my rights4 ,thy own child would not send ,away his shreds of nothing for the whole ,god6 ,wretched1 to thee who savest1 low ,i bend3 ,give me the power to let my rag-rights go ,in the great wind that from thy gulf doth blow4 #ah4 ,keep me from wrath1 let it seem ever so right3 ,my wrath will never work thy righteousness4 ,up1 up the hill1 to the whiter than snow-shine1 ,help me to climb1 and dwell in pardon's light4 ,i must be pure as thou1 or ever less ,than thy design of me--therefore incline ,my heart to take men's wrongs as thou tak'st mine4 #ai4 ,lord1 in thy spirit's hurricane1 ,i pray1 ,strip my soul naked--dress it then thy way4 ,change for me all my rags to cloth of gold4 ,who would not poverty for riches yield8 ,a hovel sell to buy a treasure-field8 ,who would a mess of porridge careful hold ,against the universe's birthright old8 #bj4 ,help me to yield my will1 in labour even1 ,nor toil on toil1 greedy of doing1 heap-- ,fretting ,i cannot more than me is given2 ,that with the finest clay my wheel runs slow1 ,nor lets the lovely thing the shapely grow2 ,that memory what thought gives it cannot keep1 ,and nightly rimes ere morn like cistus-petals go4 #ba4 ',tis--shall thy will be done for me8--or mine1 ,and ,i be made a thing not after thine-- ,my own1 and dear in paltriest details8 ,shall ,i be born of ,god1 or of mere man8 ,be made like ,christ1 or on some other plan8-- ,i let all run3--set thou and trim my sails2 ,home then my course1 let blow whatever gales4 #bb4 ,with thee on board1 each sailor is a king ,nor ,i mere captain of my vessel then1 ,but heir of earth and heaven1 eternal child2 ,daring all truth1 nor fearing anything2 ,mighty in love1 the servant of all men2 ,resenting nothing1 taking rage and blare ,into the ,godlike silence of a loving care4 #bc4 ,i cannot see1 my ,god1 a reason why ,from morn to night ,i go not gladsome free2 ,for1 if thou art what my soul thinketh thee1 ,there is no burden but should lightly lie1 ,no duty but a joy at heart must be3 ,love's perfect will can be nor sore nor small1 ,for ,god is light--in him no darkness is at all4 #bd4 ',tis something thus to think1 and half to trust-- ,but1 ah6 my very heart1 ,god-born1 should lie ,spread to the light1 clean1 clear of mire and rust1 ,and like a sponge drink the divine sunbeams4 ,what resolution then1 strong1 swift1 and high6 ,what pure devotion1 or to live or die6 ,and in my sleep1 what true1 what perfect dreams6 #be4 ,there is a misty twilight of the soul1 ,a sickly eclipse1 low brooding o'er a man1 ,when the poor brain is as an empty bowl1 ,and the thought-spirit1 weariful and wan1 ,turning from that which yet it loves the best1 ,sinks moveless1 with life-poverty opprest3-- ,watch then1 ,o ,lord1 thy feebly glimmering coal4 #bf4 ,i cannot think2 in me is but a void2 ,i have felt much1 and want to feel no more2 ,my soul is hungry for some poorer fare-- ,some earthly nectar1 gold not unalloyed3-- ,the little child that's happy to the core1 ,will leave his mother's lap1 run down the stair1 ,play with the servants--is his mother annoyed8 #bg4 ,i would not have it so4 ,weary and worn1 ,why not to thee run straight1 and be at rest8 ,motherward1 with toy new1 or garment torn1 ,the child that late forsook her changeless breast1 ,runs to home's heart1 the heaven that's heavenliest3 ,in joy or sorrow1 feebleness or might1 ,peace or commotion1 be thou1 ,father1 my delight4 #bh4 ,the thing ,i would say1 still comes forth with doubt ,and difference3--is it that thou shap'st my ends8 ,or is it only the necessity ,of stubborn words1 that shift sluggish about1 ,warping my thought as it the sentence bends8-- ,have thou a part in it1 ,o ,lord1 and ,i ,shall say a truth1 if not the thing ,i try4 #bi4 ,gather my broken fragments to a whole1 ,as these four quarters make a shining day4 ,into thy basket1 for my golden bowl1 ,take up the things that ,i have cast away ,in vice or indolence or unwise play4 ,let mine be a merry1 all-receiving heart1 ,but make it a whole1 with light in every part4 ,,march4 #a4 ,,the song birds that come to me night and morn1 ,fly oft away and vanish if ,i sleep1 ,nor to my fowling-net will one return3 ,is the thing ever ours we cannot keep8-- ,but their souls go not out into the deep4 ,what matter if with changed song they come back8 ,old strength nor yet fresh beauty shall they lack4 #b4 ,gloriously wasteful1 ,o my ,lord1 art thou6 ,sunset faints after sunset into the night1 ,splendorously dying from thy window-sill-- ,for ever4 ,sad our poverty doth bow ,before the riches of thy making might3 ,sweep from thy space thy systems at thy will-- ,in thee the sun sets every sunset still4 #c4 ,and in the perfect time1 ,o perfect ,god1 ,when we are in our home1 our natal home1 ,when joy shall carry every sacred load1 ,and from its life and peace no heart shall roam1 ,what if thou make us able to make like thee-- ,to light with moons1 to clothe with greenery1 ,to hang gold sunsets o'er a rose and purple sea6 #d4 ,then to his neighbour one may call out1 ,come6 ,brother1 come hither--,i would show you a thing2 ,and lo1 a vision of his imagining1 ,informed of thought which else had rested dumb1 ,before the neighbour's truth-delighted eyes1 ,in the great ther of existence rise1 ,and two hearts each to each the closer cling6 #e4 ,we make1 but thou art the creating core4 ,whatever thing ,i dream1 invent1 or feel1 ,thou art the heart of it1 the atmosphere4 ,thou art inside all love man ever bore2 ,yea1 the love itself1 whatever thing be dear4 ,man calls his dog1 he follows at his heel1 ,because thou first art love1 self-caused1 essential1 mere4 #f4 ,this day be with me1 ,lord1 when ,i go forth1 ,be nearer to me than ,i am able to ask4 ,in merriment1 in converse1 or in task1 ,walking the street1 listening to men of worth1 ,or greeting such as only talk and bask1 ,be thy thought still my waiting soul around1 ,and if ,he come1 ,i shall be watching found4 #g4 ,what if1 writing1 ,i always seem to leave ,some better thing1 or better way1 behind1 ,why should ,i therefore fret at all1 or grieve6 ,the worse ,i drop1 that ,i the better find2 ,the best is only in thy perfect mind4 ,fallen threads ,i will not search for--,i will weave4 ,who makes the mill-wheel backward strike to grind6 #h4 ,be with me1 ,lord4 ,keep me beyond all prayers3 ,for more than all my prayers my need of thee1 ,and thou beyond all need1 all unknown cares2 ,what the heart's dear imagination dares1 ,thou dost transcend in measureless majesty ,all prayers in one--my ,god1 be unto me ,thy own eternal self1 absolutely4 #i4 ,where should the unknown treasures of the truth ,lie1 but there whence the truth comes out the most-- ,in the ,son of man1 folded in love and ruth8 ,fair shore we see1 fair ocean2 but behind ,lie infinite reaches bathing many a coast-- ,the human thought of the eternal mind1 ,pulsed by a living tide1 blown by a living wind4 #aj4 ,thou1 healthful ,father1 art the ,ancient of ,days1 ,and ,jesus is the eternal youth of thee4 ,our old age is the scorching of the bush ,by life's indwelling1 incorruptible blaze4 ,o ,life1 burn at this feeble shell of me1 ,till ,i the sore singed garment off shall push1 ,flap out my ,psyche wings1 and to thee rush4 #aa4 ,but shall ,i then rush to thee like a dart8 ,or lie long hours onian yet betwixt ,this hunger in me1 and the ,father's heart8-- ,it shall be good1 how ever1 and not ill2 ,of things and thoughts even now thou art my next2 ,sole neighbour1 and no space between1 thou art-- ,and yet art drawing nearer1 nearer still4 #ab4 ,therefore1 my brothers1 therefore1 sisters dear1 ,however ,i1 troubled or selfish1 fail ,in tenderness1 or grace1 or service clear1 ,i every moment draw to you more near2 ,god in us from our hearts veil after veil ,keeps lifting1 till we see with his own sight1 ,and all together run in unity's delight4 #ac4 ,i love thee1 ,lord1 for very greed of love-- ,not of the precious streams that towards me move1 ,but of the indwelling1 outgoing1 fountain store4 ,than mine1 oh1 many an ignorant heart loves more6 ,therefore the more1 with ,mary at thy feet1 ,i must sit worshipping--that1 in my core1 ,thy words may fan to a flame the low primeval heat4 #ad4 ,oh my beloved1 gone to heaven from me6 ,i would be rich in love to heap you with love2 ,i long to love you1 sweet ones1 perfectly-- ,like ,god1 who sees no spanning vault above1 ,no earth below1 and feels no circling air-- ,infinitely1 no boundary anywhere4 ,i am a beast until ,i love as ,god doth love4 #ae4 ,ah1 say not1 'tis but perfect self ,i want ,but if it were1 that self is fit to live ,whose perfectness is still itself to scant1 ,which never longs to have1 but still to give4 ,a self ,i must have1 or not be at all3 ,love1 give me a self self-giving--or let me fall ,to endless darkness back1 and free me from life's thrall4 #af4 ,back1 said ,i6 ,whither back8 ,how to the dark8 ,from no dark came ,i1 but the depths of light2 ,from the sun-heart ,i came1 of love a spark3 ,what should ,i do but love with all my might8 ,to die of love severe and pure and stark1 ,were scarcely loss2 to lord a loveless height-- ,that were a living death1 damnation's positive night4 #ag4 ,but love is life4 ,to die of love is then ,the only pass to higher life than this4 ,all love is death to loving1 living men2 ,all deaths are leaps across clefts to the abyss4 ,our life is the broken current1 ,lord1 of thine1 ,flashing from morn to morn with conscious shine-- ,then first by willing death self-made1 then life divine4 #ah4 ,i love you1 my sweet children1 who are gone ,into another mansion2 but ,i know ,i love you not as ,i shall love you yet4 ,i love you1 sweet dead children2 there are none ,in the land to which ye vanished to go1 ,whose hearts more truly on your hearts are set-- ,yet should ,i die of grief to love you only so4 #ai4 ,i am but as a beast before thee1 ,lord4-- ,great poet-king1 ,i thank thee for the word4-- ,leave not thy son half-made in beastly guise-- ,less than a man1 with more than human cries-- ,an unshaped thing in which thyself cries out6 ,finish me1 ,father2 now ,i am but a doubt2 ,oh6 make thy moaning thing for joy to leap and shout4 #bj4 ,let my soul talk to thee in ordered words1 ,o king of kings1 ,o lord of only lords6-- ,when ,i am thinking thee within my heart1 ,from the broken reflex be not far apart4 ,the troubled water1 dim with upstirred soil1 ,makes not the image which it yet can spoil3-- ,come nearer1 ,lord1 and smooth the wrinkled coil4 #ba4 ,o ,lord1 when ,i do think of my departed1 ,i think of thee who art the death of parting2 ,of him who crying ,father breathed his last1 ,then radiant from the sepulchre upstarted4-- ,even then1 ,i think1 thy hands and feet kept smarting3 ,with us the bitterness of death is past1 ,but by the feet he still doth hold us fast4 #bb4 ,therefore our hands thy feet do hold as fast4 ,we pray not to be spared the sorest pang1 ,but only--be thou with us to the last4 ,let not our heart be troubled at the clang ,of hammer and nails1 nor dread the spear's keen fang1 ,nor the ghast sickening that comes of pain1 ,nor yet the last clutch of the banished brain4 #bc4 ,lord1 pity us3 we have no making power2 ,then give us making will1 adopting thine4 ,make1 make1 and make us2 temper1 and refine4 ,be in us patience--neither to start nor cower4 ,christ1 if thou be not with us--not by sign1 ,but presence1 actual as the wounds that bleed-- ,we shall not bear it1 but shall die indeed4 #bd4 ,o ,christ1 have pity on all men when they come ,unto the border haunted of dismay2 ,when that they know not draweth very near-- ,the other thing1 the opposite of day1 ,formless and ghastly1 sick1 and gaping-dumb1 ,before which even love doth lose his cheer3 ,o radiant ,christ1 remember then thy fear4 #be4 ,be by me1 ,lord1 this day4 ,thou know'st ,i mean-- ,lord1 make me mind thee4 ,i herewith forestall ,my own forgetfulness1 when ,i stoop to glean ,the corn of earth--which yet thy hand lets fall4 ,be for me then against myself4 ,oh lean ,over me then when ,i invert my cup2 ,take me1 if by the hair1 and lift me up4 #bf4 ,lord of essential life1 help me to die4 ,to will to die is one with highest life1 ,the mightiest act that to ,will's hand doth lie-- ,born of ,god's essence1 and of man's hard strife3 ,god1 give me strength my evil self to kill1 ,and die into the heaven of thy pure will4-- ,then shall this body's death be very tolerable4 #bg4 ,as to our mothers came help in our birth-- ,not lost in lifing us1 but saved and blest-- ,self bearing self1 although right sorely prest1 ,shall nothing lose1 but die and be at rest ,in life eternal1 beyond all care and dearth4 ,god-born then truly1 a man does no more ill1 ,perfectly loves1 and has whate'er he will4 #bh4 ,as our dear animals do suffer less ,because their pain spreads neither right nor left1 ,lost in oblivion and foresightlessness-- ,our suffering sore by faith shall be bereft ,of all dismay1 and every weak excess4 ,his presence shall be better in our pain1 ,than even self-absence to the weaker brain4 #bi4 ,father1 let this cup pass4 ,he prayed--was heard4 ,what cup was it that passed away from him8 ,sure not the death-cup1 now filled to the brim6 ,there was no quailing in the awful word2 ,he still was king of kings1 of lords the lord3-- ,he feared lest1 in the suffering waste and grim1 ,his faith might grow too faint and sickly dim4 #cj4 ,thy mind1 my master1 ,i will dare explore2 ,what we are told1 that we are meant to know4 ,into thy soul ,i search yet more and more1 ,led by the lamp of my desire and woe4 ,if thee1 my ,lord1 ,i may not understand1 ,i am a wanderer in a houseless land1 ,a weeping thirst by hot winds ever fanned4 #ca4 ,therefore ,i look again--and think ,i see ,that1 when at last he did cry out1 ,my ,god1 ,why hast thou me forsaken8 straight man's rod ,was turned aside2 for1 that same moment1 he ,cried ,father6 and gave up will and breath and spirit ,into his hands whose all he did inherit-- ,delivered1 glorified eternally4 ,,april4 #a4 ,,lord1 ,i do choose the higher than my will4 ,i would be handled by thy nursing arms ,after thy will1 not my infant alarms4 ,hurt me thou wilt--but then more loving still1 ,if more can be and less1 in love's perfect zone6 ,my fancy shrinks from least of all thy harms1 ,but do thy will with me--,i am thine own4 #b4 ,some things wilt thou not one day turn to dreams8 ,some dreams wilt thou not one day turn to fact8 ,the thing that painful1 more than should be1 seems1 ,shall not thy sliding years with them retract-- ,shall fair realities not counteract8 ,the thing that was well dreamed of bliss and joy-- ,wilt thou not breathe thy life into the toy8 #c4 ,i have had dreams of absolute delight1 ,beyond all waking bliss--only of grass1 ,flowers1 wind1 a peak1 a limb of marble white2 ,they dwell with me like things half come to pass1 ,true prophecies3--when ,i with thee am right1 ,if ,i pray1 waking1 for such a joy of sight1 ,thou with the gold1 wilt not refuse the brass4 #d4 ,i think ,i shall not ever pray for such2 ,thy bliss will overflood my heart and brain1 ,and ,i want no unripe things back again4 ,love ever fresher1 lovelier than of old-- ,how should it want its more exchanged for much8 ,love will not backward sigh1 but forward strain1 ,on in the tale still telling1 never told4 #e4 ,what has been1 shall not only be1 but is4 ,the hues of dreamland1 strange and sweet and tender ,are but hint-shadows of full many a splendour ,which the high ,parent-love will yet unroll ,before his child's obedient1 humble soul4 ,ah1 me1 my ,god6 in thee lies every bliss ,whose shadow men go hunting wearily amiss4 #f4 ,now1 ere ,i sleep1 ,i wonder what ,i shall dream4 ,some sense of being1 utter new1 may come ,into my soul while ,i am blind and dumb-- ,with shapes and airs and scents which dark hours teem1 ,of other sort than those that haunt the day1 ,hinting at precious things1 ages away ,in the long tale of us ,god to himself doth say4 #g4 ,late1 in a dream1 an unknown lady ,i saw ,stand on a tomb2 down she to me stepped thence4 ,they tell me1 quoth ,i1 thou art one of the dead6 ,and scarce believed for gladness the yea she said2 ,a strange auroral bliss1 an arctic awe1 ,a new1 outworldish joy awoke intense1 ,to think ,i talked with one that verily was dead4 #h4 ,thou dost demand our love1 holy ,lord ,christ1 ,and batest nothing of thy modesty2-- ,thou know'st no other way to bliss the highest ,than loving thee1 the loving1 perfectly4 ,thou lovest perfectly--that is thy bliss3 ,we must love like thee1 or our being miss-- ,so1 to love perfectly1 love perfect ,love1 love thee4 #i4 ,here is my heart1 ,o ,christ2 thou know'st ,i love thee4 ,but wretched is the thing ,i call my love4 ,o ,love divine1 rise up in me and move me-- ,i follow surely when thou first dost move4 ,to love the perfect love1 is primal1 mere ,necessity2 and he who holds life dear1 ,must love thee every hope and heart above4 #aj4 ,might ,i but scatter interfering things-- ,questions and doubts1 distrusts and anxious pride1 ,and in thy garment1 as under gathering wings1 ,nestle obedient to thy loving side1 ,easy it were to love thee4 ,but when thou ,send'st me to think and labour from thee wide1 ,love falls to asking many a why and how4 #aa4 ,easier it were1 but poorer were the love4 ,lord1 ,i would have me love thee from the deeps-- ,of troubled thought1 of pain1 of weariness4 ,through seething wastes below1 billows above1 ,my soul should rise in eager1 hungering leaps2 ,through thorny thicks1 through sands unstable press-- ,out of my dream to him who slumbers not nor sleeps4 #ab4 ,i do not fear the greatness of thy command-- ,to keep heart-open-house to brother men2 ,but till in thy ,god's love perfect ,i stand1 ,my door not wide enough will open4 ,then ,each man will be love-awful in my sight2 ,and1 open to the eternal morning's might1 ,each human face will shine my window for thy light4 #ac4 ,make me all patience and all diligence2 ,patience1 that thou mayst have thy time with me2 ,diligence1 that ,i waste not thy expense ,in sending out to bring me home to thee4 ,what though thy work in me transcends my sense-- ,too fine1 too high1 for me to understand-- ,i hope entirely4 ,on1 ,lord1 with thy labour grand4 #ad4 ,lest ,i be humbled at the last1 and told ,that my great labour was but for my peace ,that not for love or truth had ,i been bold1 ,but merely for a prisoned heart's release2 ,careful1 ,i humble me now before thy feet3 ,whate'er ,i be1 ,i cry1 and will not cease-- ,let me not perish1 though favour be not meet4 #ae4 ,for1 what ,i seek thou knowest ,i must find1 ,or miserably die for lack of love4 ,i justify thee3 what is in thy mind1 ,if it be shame to me1 all shame above4 ,thou know'st ,i choose it--know'st ,i would not shove ,the hand away that stripped me for the rod-- ,if so it pleased my ,life1 my love-made-angry ,god4 #af4 ,i see a door1 a multitude near by1 ,in creed and quarrel1 sure disciples all6 ,gladly they would1 they say1 enter the hall1 ,but cannot1 the stone threshold is so high4 ,from unseen hand1 full many a feeding crumb1 ,slow dropping o'er the threshold high doth come3 ,they gather and eat1 with much disputing hum4 #ag4 ,still and anon1 a loud clear voice doth call-- ,make your feet clean1 and enter so the hall4 ,they hear1 they stoop1 they gather each a crumb4 ,oh the deaf people6 would they were also dumb6 ,hear how they talk1 and lack of ,christ deplore1 ,stamping with muddy feet about the door1 ,and will not wipe them clean to walk upon his floor6 #ah4 ,but see1 one comes2 he listens to the voice2 ,careful he wipes his weary dusty feet6 ,the voice hath spoken--to him is left no choice2 ,he hurries to obey--that only is meet4 ,low sinks the threshold1 levelled with the ground2 ,the man leaps in--to liberty he's bound4 ,the rest go talking1 walking1 picking round4 #ai4 ,if ,i1 thus writing1 rebuke my neighbour dull1 ,and talk1 and write1 and enter not the door1 ,than all the rest ,i wrong ,christ tenfold more1 ,making his gift of vision void and null4 ,help me this day to be thy humble sheep1 ,eating thy grass1 and following1 thou before2 ,from wolfish lies my life1 ,o ,shepherd1 keep4 #bj4 ,god1 help me1 dull of heart1 to trust in thee4 ,thou art the father of me--not any mood ,can part me from the ,one1 the verily ,good4 ,when fog and failure o'er my being brood4 ,when life looks but a glimmering marshy clod1 ,no fire out flashing from the living ,god-- ,then1 then1 to rest in faith were worthy victory6 #ba4 ,to trust is gain and growth1 not mere sown seed6 ,faith heaves the world round to the heavenly dawn1 ,in whose great light the soul doth spell and read ,itself high-born1 its being derived and drawn ,from the eternal self-existent fire2 ,then1 mazed with joy of its own heavenly breed1 ,exultant-humble falls before its awful sire4 #bb4 ,art thou not1 ,jesus1 busy like to us8 ,thee shall ,i image as one sitting still1 ,ordering all things in thy potent will1 ,silent1 and thinking ever to thy father1 ,whose thought through thee flows multitudinous8 ,or shall ,i think of thee as journeying1 rather1 ,ceaseless through space1 because thou everything dost fill8 #bc4 ,that all things thou dost fill1 ,i well may think-- ,thy power doth reach me in so many ways4 ,thou who in one the universe dost bind1 ,passest through all the channels of my mind2 ,the sun of thought1 across the farthest brink ,of consciousness thou sendest me thy rays2 ,nor drawest them in when lost in sleep ,i sink4 #bd4 ,so common are thy paths1 thy coming seems ,only another phase oft of my me2 ,but nearer is my ,i1 ,o ,lord1 to thee1 ,than is my ,i to what itself it deems2 ,how better then couldst thou1 ,o master1 come1 ,than from thy home across into my home1 ,straight o'er the marches that ,i cannot see6 #be4 ,marches8--',twixt thee and me there's no division1 ,except the meeting of thy will and mine1 ,the loves that love1 the wills that will the same4 ,where thine meets mine is my life's true condition2 ,yea1 only there it burns with any flame4 ,thy will but holds me to my life's fruition4 ,o ,god1 ,i would--,i have no mine that is not thine4 #bf4 ,i look for thee1 and do not see thee come4-- ,if ,i could see thee1 'twere a commoner thing1 ,and shallower comfort would thy coming bring4 ,earth1 sea1 and air lie round me moveless dumb1 ,never a tremble1 an expectant hum1 ,to tell the ,lord of ,hearts is drawing near3 ,lo6 in the looking eyes1 the looked for ,lord is here4 #bg4 ,i take a comfort from my very badness3 ,it is for lack of thee that ,i am bad4 ,how close1 how infinitely closer yet ,must ,i come to thee1 ere ,i can pay one debt ,which mere humanity has on me set6 ,how close to thee6--no wonder1 soul1 thou art glad6 ,oneness with him is the eternal gladness4 #bh4 ,what can there be so close as making and made8 ,nought twinned can be so near2 thou art more nigh ,to me1 my ,god1 than is this thinking ,i ,to that ,i mean when ,i by me is said2 ,thou art more near me1 than is my ready will ,near to my love1 though both one place do fill2-- ,yet1 till we are one1--,ah me6 the long until6 #bi4 ,then shall my heart behold thee everywhere4 ,the vision rises of a speechless thing1 ,a perfectness of bliss beyond compare6 ,a time when ,i nor breathe nor think nor move1 ,but ,i do breathe and think and feel thy love1 ,the soul of all the songs the saints do sing6-- ,and life dies out in bliss1 to come again in prayer4 #cj4 ,in the great glow of that great love1 this death ,would melt away like a fantastic cloud2 ,i should no more shrink from it than from the breath ,that makes in the frosty air a nimbus-shroud2 ,thou1 ,love1 hast conquered death1 and ,i aloud ,should triumph over him1 with thy saintly crowd1 ,that where the ,lamb goes ever followeth4 ,,may4 #a4 ,,what though my words glance sideways from the thing ,which ,i would utter in thine ear1 my sire6 ,truth in the inward parts thou dost desire-- ,wise hunger1 not a fitness fine of speech3 ,the little child that clamouring fails to reach ,with upstretched hand the fringe of her attire1 ,yet meets the mother's hand down hurrying4 #b4 ,even when their foolish words they turned on him1 ,he did not his disciples send away2 ,he knew their hearts were foolish1 eyes were dim1 ,and therefore by his side needs must they stay4 ,thou will not1 ,lord1 send me away from thee4 ,when ,i am foolish1 make thy cock crow grim2 ,if that is not enough1 turn1 ,lord1 and look on me4 #c4 ,another day of gloom and slanting rain6 ,of closed skies1 cold winds1 and blight and bane6 ,such not the weather1 ,lord1 which thou art fain ,to give thy chosen1 sweet to heart and brain6-- ,until we mourn1 thou keep'st the merry tune2 ,thy hand unloved its pleasure must restrain1 ,nor spoil both gift and child by lavishing too soon4 #d4 ,but all things shall be ours6 ,up1 heart1 and sing4 ,all things were made for us--we are ,god's heirs-- ,moon1 sun1 and wildest comets that do trail ,a crowd of small worlds for a swiftness-tail6 ,up from ,thy depths in me1 my child-heart bring-- ,the child alone inherits anything3 ,god's little children-gods--all things are theirs6 #e4 ,thy great deliverance is a greater thing ,than purest imagination can foregrasp2 ,a thing beyond all conscious hungering1 ,beyond all hope that makes the poet sing4 ,it takes the clinging world1 undoes its clasp1 ,floats it afar upon a mighty sea1 ,and leaves us quiet with love and liberty and thee4 #f4 ,through all the fog1 through all earth's wintery sighs1 ,i scent ,thy spring1 ,i feel the eternal air1 ,warm1 soft1 and dewy1 filled with flowery eyes1 ,and gentle1 murmuring motions everywhere-- ,of life in heart1 and tree1 and brook1 and moss2 ,thy breath wakes beauty1 love1 and bliss1 and prayer1 ,and strength to hang with nails upon thy cross4 #g4 ,if thou hadst closed my life in seed and husk1 ,and cast me into soft1 warm1 damp1 dark mould1 ,all unaware of light come through the dusk1 ,i yet should feel the split of each shelly fold1 ,should feel the growing of my prisoned heart1 ,and dully dream of being slow unrolled1 ,and in some other vagueness taking part4 #h4 ,and little as the world ,i should foreknow ,up into which ,i was about to rise-- ,its rains1 its radiance1 airs1 and warmth1 and skies1 ,how it would greet me1 how its wind would blow-- ,as little1 it may be1 ,i do know the good ,which ,i for years half darkling have pursued-- ,the second birth for which my nature cries4 #i4 ,the life that knows not1 patient waits1 nor longs3-- ,i know1 and would be patient1 yet would long4 ,i can be patient for all coming songs1 ,but let me sing my one monotonous song4 ,to me the time is slow my mould among2 ,to quicker life ,i fain would spur and start ,the aching growth at my dull-swelling heart4 #aj4 ,christ is the pledge that ,i shall one day see2 ,that one day1 still with him1 ,i shall awake1 ,and know my ,god1 at one with him and free4 ,o lordly essence1 come to life in me2 ,the will-throb let me feel that doth me make2 ,now have ,i many a mighty hope in thee1 ,then shall ,i rest although the universe should quake4 #aa4 ,haste to me1 ,lord1 when this fool-heart of mine ,begins to gnaw itself with selfish craving2 ,or1 like a foul thing scarcely worth the saving1 ,swoln up with wrath1 desireth vengeance fine4 ,haste1 ,lord1 to help1 when reason favours wrong2 ,haste when thy soul1 the high-born thing divine1 ,is torn by passion's raving1 maniac throng4 #ab4 ,fair freshness of the ,god-breathed spirit air1 ,pass through my soul1 and make it strong to love2 ,wither with gracious cold what demons dare ,shoot from my hell into my world above2 ,let them drop down1 like leaves the sun doth sear1 ,and flutter far into the inane and bare1 ,leaving my middle-earth calm1 wise1 and clear4 #ac4 ,even thou canst give me neither thought nor thing1 ,were it the priceless pearl hid in the land1 ,which1 if ,i fix thereon a greedy gaze1 ,becomes not poison that doth burn and cling2 ,their own bad look my foolish eyes doth daze1 ,they see the gift1 see not the giving hand-- ,from the living root the apple dead ,i wring4 #ad4 ,this versing1 even the reading of the tale ,that brings my heart its joy unspeakable1 ,sometimes will softly1 unsuspectedly hale ,that heart from thee1 and all its pulses quell4 ,discovery's pride1 joy's bliss1 take aback my sail1 ,and sweep me from thy presence and my grace1 ,because my eyes dropped from the master's face4 #ae4 ,afresh ,i seek thee4 ,lead me--once more ,i pray-- ,even should it be against my will1 thy way4 ,let me not feel thee foreign any hour1 ,or shrink from thee as an estranged power4 ,through doubt1 through faith1 through bliss1 through stark dismay1 ,through sunshine1 wind1 or snow1 or fog1 or shower1 ,draw me to thee who art my only day4 #af4 ,i would go near thee--but ,i cannot press ,into thy presence--it helps not to presume4 ,thy doors are deeds2 the handles are their doing4 ,he whose day-life is obedient righteousness1 ,who1 after failure1 or a poor success1 ,rises up1 stronger effort yet renewing-- ,he finds thee1 ,lord1 at length1 in his own common room4 #ag4 ,lord1 thou hast carried me through this evening's duty2 ,i am released1 weary1 and well content4 ,o soul1 put on the evening dress of beauty1 ,thy sunset-flush1 of gold and purple blent6-- ,alas1 the moment ,i turn to my heart1 ,feeling runs out of doors1 or stands apart6 ,but such as ,i am1 ,lord1 take me as thou art4 #ah4 ,the word he then did speak1 fits now as then1 ,for the same kind of men doth mock at it4 ,god-fools1 ,god-drunkards these do call the men ,who think the poverty of their all not fit1 ,borne humbly by their art1 their voice1 their pen1 ,save for its allness1 at thy feet to fling1 ,for whom all is unfit that is not everything4 #ai4 ,o ,christ1 my life1 possess me utterly4 ,take me and make a little ,christ of me4 ,if ,i am anything but thy father's son1 ',tis something not yet from the darkness won4 ,oh1 give me light to live with open eyes4 ,oh1 give me life to hope above all skies4 ,give me thy spirit to haunt the ,father with my cries4 #bj4 ',tis hard for man to rouse his spirit up-- ,it is the human creative agony1 ,though but to hold the heart an empty cup1 ,or tighten on the team the rigid rein4 ,many will rather lie among the slain ,than creep through narrow ways the light to gain-- ,than wake the will1 and be born bitterly4 #ba4 ,but he who would be born again indeed1 ,must wake his soul unnumbered times a day1 ,and urge himself to life with holy greed2 ,now ope his bosom to the ,wind's free play2 ,and now1 with patience forceful1 hard1 lie still1 ,submiss and ready to the making will1 ,athirst and empty1 for ,god's breath to fill4 #bb4 ,all times are thine whose will is our remede4 ,man turns to thee1 thou hast not turned away2 ,the look he casts1 thy labour that did breed-- ,it is thy work1 thy business all the day3 ,that look1 not foregone fitness1 thou dost heed4 ,for duty absolute how be fitter than now8 ,or learn by shunning8--,lord1 ,i come2 help thou4 #bc4 ,ever above my coldness and my doubt ,rises up something1 reaching forth a hand3 ,this thing ,i know1 but cannot understand4 ,is it the ,god in me that rises out ,beyond my self1 trailing it up with him1 ,towards the spirit-home1 the freedom-land1 ,beyond my conscious ken1 my near horizon's brim8 #bd4 ,o ,god of man1 my heart would worship all ,my fellow men1 the flashes from thy fire2 ,them in good sooth my lofty kindred call1 ,born of the same one heart1 the perfect sire2 ,love of my kind alone can set me free2 ,help me to welcome all that come to me1 ,not close my doors and dream solitude liberty6 #be4 ,a loving word may set some door ajar ,where seemed no door1 and that may enter in ,which lay at the heart of that same loving word4 ,in my still chamber dwell thou always1 ,lord2 ,thy presence there will carriage true afford2 ,true words will flow1 pure of design to win2 ,and to my men my door shall have no bar4 #bf4 ,my prayers1 my ,god1 flow from what ,i am not2 ,i think thy answers make me what ,i am4 ,like weary waves thought follows upon thought1 ,but the still depth beneath is all thine own1 ,and there thou mov'st in paths to us unknown4 ,out of strange strife thy peace is strangely wrought2 ,if the lion in us pray--thou answerest the lamb4 #bg4 ,so bound in selfishness am ,i1 so chained1 ,i know it must be glorious to be free ,but know not what1 full-fraught1 the word doth mean4 ,by loss on loss ,i have severely gained ,wisdom enough my slavery to see2 ,but liberty1 pure1 absolute1 serene1 ,no frest-visioned slave has ever seen4 #bh4 ,for1 that great freedom how should such as ,i ,be able to imagine in such a self8 ,less hopeless far the miser man might try ,to image the delight of friend-shared pelf4 ,freedom is to be like thee1 face and heart2 ,to know it1 ,lord1 ,i must be as thou art1 ,i cannot breed the imagination high4 #bi4 ,yet hints come to me from the realm unknown2 ,airs drift across the twilight border land1 ,odoured with life2 and as from some far strand ,sea-murmured1 whispers to my heart are blown ,that fill me with a joy ,i cannot speak1 ,yea1 from whose shadow words drop faint and weak3 ,thee1 ,god1 ,i shadow in that region grand4 #cj4 ,o ,christ1 who didst appear in ,judah land1 ,thence by the cross go back to ,god's right hand1 ,plain history1 and things our sense beyond1 ,in thee together come and correspond3 ,how rulest thou from the undiscovered bourne ,the world-wise world that laughs thee still to scorn8 ,please1 ,lord1 let thy disciple understand4 #ca4 ',tis heart on heart thou rulest4 ,thou art the same ,at ,god's right hand as here exposed to shame1 ,and therefore workest now as thou didst then-- ,feeding the faint divine in humble men4 ,through all thy realms from thee goes out heart-power1 ,working the holy1 satisfying hour1 ,when all shall love1 and all be loved again4 ,,june4 #a4 ,,from thine1 as then1 the healing virtue goes ,into our hearts--that is the ,father's plan4 ,from heart to heart it sinks1 it steals1 it flows1 ,from these that know thee still infecting those4 ,here is my heart--from thine1 ,lord1 fill it up1 ,that ,i may offer it as the holy cup ,of thy communion to my every man4 #b4 ,when thou dost send out whirlwinds on thy seas1 ,alternatest thy lightning with its roar1 ,thy night with morning1 and thy clouds with stars ,or1 mightier force unseen in midst of these1 ,orderest the life in every airy pore2 ,guidest men's efforts1 rul'st mishaps and jars1-- ',tis only for their hearts1 and nothing more4 #c4 ,this1 this alone thy father careth for-- ,that men should live hearted throughout with thee-- ,because the simple1 only life thou art1 ,of the very truth of living1 the pure heart4 ,for this1 deep waters whelm the fruitful lea1 ,wars ravage1 famine wastes1 plague withers1 nor ,shall cease till men have chosen the better part4 #d4 ,but1 like a virtuous medicine1 self-diffused ,through all men's hearts thy love shall sink and float2 ,till every feeling false1 and thought unwise1 ,selfish1 and seeking1 shall1 sternly disused1 ,wither1 and die1 and shrivel up to nought2 ,and ,christ1 whom they did hang 'twixt earth and skies1 ,up in the inner world of men arise4 #e4 ,make me a fellow worker with thee1 ,christ2 ,nought else befits a ,god-born energy2 ,of all that's lovely1 only lives the highest1 ,lifing the rest that it shall never die4 ,up ,i would be to help thee--for thou liest ,not1 linen-swathed in ,joseph's garden-tomb1 ,but walkest crowned1 creation's heart and bloom4 #f4 ,my ,god1 when ,i would lift my heart to thee1 ,imagination instantly doth set ,a cloudy something1 thin1 and vast1 and vague1 ,to stand for him who is the fact of me2 ,then up the ,will1 and doth her weakness plague ,to pay the heart her duty and her debt1 ,showing the face that hearkeneth to the plea4 #g4 ,and hence it comes that thou at times dost seem ,to fade into an image of my mind2 ,i1 dreamer1 cover1 hide thee up with dream1-- ,thee1 primal1 individual entity6-- ,no likeness will ,i seek to frame or find1 ,but cry to that which thou dost choose to be1 ,to that which is my sight1 therefore ,i cannot see4 #h4 ,no likeness8 ,lo1 the ,christ6 ,oh1 large ,enough6 ,i see1 yet fathom not the face he wore4 ,he is--and out of him there is no stuff ,to make a man4 ,let fail me every spark ,of blissful vision on my pathway rough1 ,i have seen much1 and trust the perfect more1 ,while to his feet my faith crosses the wayless dark4 #i4 ,faith is the human shadow of thy might4 ,thou art the one self-perfect life1 and we ,who trust thy life1 therein join on to thee1 ,taking our part in self-creating light4 ,to trust is to step forward out of the night-- ,to be--to share in the outgoing ,will ,that lives and is1 because outgoing still4 #aj4 ,i am lost before thee1 ,father6 yet ,i will ,claim of thee my birthright ineffable4 ,thou lay'st it on me1 son1 to claim thee1 sire2 ,to that which thou hast made me1 ,i aspire2 ,to thee1 the sun1 upflames thy kindled fire4 ,no man presumes in that to which he was born2 ,less than the gift to claim1 would be the giver to scorn4 #aa4 ,henceforth all things thy dealings are with me ,for out of thee is nothing1 or can be1 ,and all things are to draw us home to thee4 ,what matter that the knowers scoffing say1 ,this is old folly1 plain to the new day8-- ,if thou be such as thou1 and they as they1 ,unto thy ,let there be1 they still must answer ,nay4 #ab4 ,they will not1 therefore cannot1 do not know him4 ,nothing they could know1 could be ,god4 ,in sooth1 ,unto the true alone exists the truth4 ,they say well1 saying ,nature doth not show him3 ,truly she shows not what she cannot show2 ,and they deny the thing they cannot know4 ,who sees a glory1 towards it will go4 #ac4 ,faster no step moves ,god because the fool ,shouts to the universe ,god there is none2 ,the blindest man will not preach out the sun1 ,though on his darkness he should found a school4 ,it may be1 when he finds he is not dead1 ,though world and body1 sight and sound are fled1 ,some eyes may open in his foolish head4 #ad4 ,when ,i am very weary with hard thought1 ,and yet the question burns and is not quenched1 ,my heart grows cool when to remembrance wrought ,that thou who know'st the light-born answer sought ,know'st too the dark where the doubt lies entrenched-- ,know'st with what seemings ,i am sore perplexed1 ,and that with thee ,i wait1 nor needs my soul be vexed4 #ae4 ,who sets himself not sternly to be good1 ,is but a fool1 who judgment of true things ,has none1 however oft the claim renewed4 ,and he who thinks1 in his great plenitude1 ,to right himself1 and set his spirit free1 ,without the might of higher communings1 ,is foolish also--save he willed himself to be4 #af4 ,how many helps thou giv'st to those would learn6 ,to some sore pain1 to others a sinking heart2 ,to some a weariness worse than any smart2 ,to some a haunting1 fearing1 blind concern2 ,madness to some2 to some the shaking dart ,of hideous death still following as they turn2 ,to some a hunger that will not depart4 #ag4 ,to some thou giv'st a deep unrest--a scorn ,of all they are or see upon the earth2 ,a gaze1 at dusky night and clearing morn1 ,as on a land of emptiness and dearth2 ,to some a bitter sorrow2 to some the sting ,of love misprized--of sick abandoning2 ,to some a frozen heart1 oh1 worse than anything6 #ah4 ,to some a mocking demon1 that doth set ,the poor foiled will to scoff at the ideal1 ,but loathsome makes to them their life of jar4 ,the messengers of ,satan think to mar1 ,but make--driving the soul from false to feal-- ,to thee1 the reconciler1 the one real1 ,in whom alone the would be and the is are met4 #ai4 ,me thou hast given an infinite unrest1 ,a hunger--not at first after known good1 ,but something vague ,i knew not1 and yet would-- ,the veiled ,isis1 thy will not understood2 ,a conscience tossing ever in my breast2 ,and something deeper1 that will not be expressed1 ,save as the ,spirit thinking in the ,spirit's brood4 #bj4 ,but now the ,spirit and ,i are one in this-- ,my hunger now is after righteousness2 ,my spirit hopes in ,god to set me free ,from the low self loathed of the higher me4 ,great elder brother of my second birth1 ,dear o'er all names but one1 in heaven or earth1 ,teach me all day to love eternally4 #ba4 ,lo1 ,lord1 thou know'st1 ,i would not anything ,that in the heart of ,god holds not its root2 ,nor falsely deem there is any life at all ,that doth in him nor sleep nor shine nor sing2 ,i know the plants that bear the noisome fruit ,of burning and of ashes and of gall-- ,from ,god's heart torn1 rootless to man's they cling4 #bb4 ,life-giving love rots to devouring fire2 ,justice corrupts to despicable revenge2 ,motherhood chokes in the dam's jealous mire2 ,hunger for growth turns fluctuating change2 ,love's anger grand grows spiteful human wrath1 ,hunting men out of conscience' holy path2 ,and human kindness takes the tattler's range4 #bc4 ,nothing can draw the heart of man but good2 ,low good it is that draws him from the higher-- ,so evil--poison uncreate from food4 ,never a foul thing1 with temptation dire1 ,tempts hellward force created to aspire1 ,but walks in wronged strength of imprisoned ,truth1 ,whose mantle also oft the ,shame indu'th4 #bd4 ,love in the prime not yet ,i understand-- ,scarce know the love that loveth at first hand3 ,help me my selfishness to scatter and scout2 ,blow on me till my love loves burningly2 ,then the great love will burn the mean self out1 ,and ,i1 in glorious simplicity1 ,living by love1 shall love unspeakably4 #be4 ,oh1 make my anger pure--let no worst wrong ,rouse in me the old niggard selfishness4 ,give me thine indignation--which is love ,turned on the evil that would part love's throng2 ,thy anger scathes because it needs must bless1 ,gathering into union calm and strong ,all things on earth1 and under1 and above4 #bf4 ,make my forgiveness downright--such as ,i ,should perish if ,i did not have from thee2 ,i let the wrong go1 withered up and dry1 ,cursed with divine forgetfulness in me4 ',tis but self-pity1 pleasant1 mean1 and sly1 ,low whispering bids the paltry memory live3-- ,what am ,i brother for1 but to forgive6 #bg4 ,thou art my father's child--come to my heart3 ,thus must ,i say1 or ,thou must say1 ,depart2 ,thus ,i would say--,i would be as thou art2 ,thus ,i must say1 or still ,i work athwart ,the absolute necessity and law ,that dwells in me1 and will me asunder draw1 ,if in obedience ,i leave any flaw4 #bh4 ,lord1 ,i forgive--and step in unto thee4 ,if ,i have enemies1 ,christ deal with them3 ,he hath forgiven me and ,jerusalem4 ,lord1 set me from self-inspiration free1 ,and let me live and think from thee1 not me-- ,rather1 from deepest me then think and feel1 ,at centre of thought's swift-revolving wheel4 #bi4 ,i sit o'ercanopied with ,beauty's tent1 ,through which flies many a golden-winged dove1 ,well watched of ,fancy's tender eyes up bent2 ,a hundred ,powers wait on me1 ministering2 ,a thousand treasures ,art and ,knowledge bring2 ,will1 ,conscience1 ,reason tower the rest above2 ,but in the midst1 alone1 ,i gladness am and love4 #cj4 ',tis but a vision1 ,lord2 ,i do not mean ,that thus ,i am1 or have one moment been-- ',tis but a picture hung upon my wall1 ,to measure dull contentment therewithal1 ,and know behind the human how ,i fall2-- ,a vision true1 of what one day shall be1 ,when thou hast had thy very will with me4 ,,july4 #a4 ,,alas1 my tent6 see through it a whirlwind sweep6 ,moaning1 poor ,fancy's doves are swept away4 ,i sit alone1 a sorrow half asleep1 ,my consciousness the blackness all astir4 ,no pilgrim ,i1 a homeless wanderer-- ,for how canst ,thou be in the darkness deep1 ,who dwellest only in the living day8 #b4 ,it must be1 somewhere in my fluttering tent1 ,strange creatures1 half tamed only yet1 are pent-- ,dragons1 lop-winged birds1 and large-eyed snakes6 ,hark6 through the storm the saddest howling breaks6 ,or are they loose1 roaming about the bent1 ,the darkness dire deepening with moan and scream8-- ,my ,morning1 rise1 and all shall be a dream4 #c4 ,not thine1 my ,lord1 the darkness all is mine-- ,save that1 as mine1 my darkness too is thine3 ,all things are thine to save or to destroy-- ,destroy my darkness1 rise my perfect joy2 ,love primal1 the live coal of every night1 ,flame out1 scare the ill things with radiant fright1 ,and fill my tent with laughing morn's delight4 #d4 ,master1 thou workest with such common things-- ,low souls1 weak hearts1 ,i mean--and hast to use1 ,therefore1 such common means and rescuings1 ,that hard we find it1 as we sit and muse1 ,to think thou workest in us verily3 ,bad sea-boats we1 and manned with wretched crews-- ,that doubt the captain1 watch the storm-spray flee4 #e4 ,thou art hampered in thy natural working then ,when beings designed on freedom's holy plan ,will not be free3 with thy poor1 foolish men1 ,thou therefore hast to work just like a man4 ,but when1 tangling thyself in their sore need1 ,thou hast to freedom fashioned them indeed1 ,then wilt thou grandly move1 and ,godlike speed4 #f4 ,will this not then show grandest fact of all-- ,in thy creation victory most renowned-- ,that thou hast wrought thy will by slow and small1 ,and made men like thee1 though thy making bound ,by that which they were not1 and could not be ,until thou mad'st them make along with thee8-- ,master1 the tardiness is but in me4 #g4 ,hence come thy checks--because ,i still would run ,my head into the sand1 nor flutter aloft ,towards thy home1 with thy wind under me4 ',tis because ,i am mean1 thy ways so oft ,look mean to me2 my rise is low begun2 ,but scarce thy will doth grasp me1 ere ,i see1 ,for my arrest and rise1 its stern necessity4 #h4 ,like clogs upon the pinions of thy plan ,we hang--like captives on thy chariot-wheels1 ,who should climb up and ride with ,death's conqueror2 ,therefore thy train along the world's highway steals ,so slow to the peace of heart-reluctant man4 ,what shall we do to spread the wing and soar1 ,nor straiten thy deliverance any more8 #i4 ,the sole way to put flight into the wing1 ,to preen its feathers1 and to make them grow1 ,is to heed humbly every smallest thing ,with which the ,christ in us has aught to do4 ,so will the ,christ from child to manhood go1 ,obedient to the father ,christ1 and so ,sweet holy change will turn all our old things to new4 #aj4 ,creation thou dost work by faint degrees1 ,by shade and shadow from unseen beginning2 ,far1 far apart1 in unthought mysteries ,of thy own dark1 unfathomable seas1 ,thou will'st thy will2 and thence1 upon the earth-- ,slow travelling1 his way through centuries winning-- ,a child at length arrives at never ending birth4 #aa4 ,well mayst thou then work on indocile hearts ,by small successes1 disappointments small2 ,by nature1 weather1 failure1 or sore fall2 ,by shame1 anxiety1 bitterness1 and smarts2 ,by loneliness1 by weary loss of zest3-- ,the rags1 the husks1 the swine1 the hunger-quest1 ,drive home the wanderer to the father's breast4 #ab4 ,how suddenly some rapid turn of thought ,may throw the life-machine all out of gear1 ,clouding the windows with the steam of doubt1 ,filling the eyes with dust1 with noise the ear6 ,who knows not then where dwells the engineer1 ,rushes aghast into the pathless night1 ,and wanders in a land of dreary fright4 #ac4 ,amazed at sightless whirring of their wheels1 ,confounded with the recklessness and strife1 ,distract with fears of what may next ensue1 ,some break rude exit from the house of life1 ,and plunge into a silence out of view-- ,whence not a cry1 no wafture once reveals ,what door they have broke open with the knife4 #ad4 ,help me1 my ,father1 in whatever dismay1 ,whatever terror in whatever shape1 ,to hold the faster by thy garment's hem2 ,when my heart sinks1 oh1 lift it up1 ,i pray2 ,thy child should never fear though hell should gape1 ,not blench though all the ills that men affray ,stood round him like the ,roman round ,jerusalem4 #ae4 ,too eager ,i must not be to understand4 ,how should the work the master goes about ,fit the vague sketch my compasses have planned8 ,i am his house--for him to go in and out4 ,he builds me now--and if ,i cannot see ,at any time what he is doing with me1 ',tis that he makes the house for me too grand4 #af4 ,the house is not for me--it is for him4 ,his royal thoughts require many a stair1 ,many a tower1 many an outlook fair1 ,of which ,i have no thought1 and need no care4 ,where ,i am most perplexed1 it may be there ,thou mak'st a secret chamber1 holy-dim1 ,where thou wilt come to help my deepest prayer4 #ag4 ,i cannot tell why this day ,i am ill2 ,but ,i am well because it is thy will-- ,which is to make me pure and right like thee4 ,not yet ,i need escape--'tis bearable ,because thou knowest4 ,and when harder things ,shall rise and gather1 and overshadow me1 ,i shall have comfort in thy strengthenings4 #ah4 ,how do ,i live when thou art far away8-- ,when ,i am sunk1 and lost1 and dead in sleep1 ,or in some dream with no sense in its play8 ,when weary-dull1 or drowned in study deep8-- ,o ,lord1 ,i live so utterly on thee1 ,i live when ,i forget thee utterly-- ,not that thou thinkest of1 but thinkest me4 #ai4 ,thou far6--that word the holy truth doth blur4 ,doth the great ocean from the small fish run ,when it sleeps fast in its low weedy bower8 ,is the sun far from any smallest flower1 ,that lives by his dear presence every hour8 ,are they not one in oneness without stir-- ,the flower the flower because the sun the sun8 #bj4 ,dear presence every hour6--what of the night1 ,when crumpled daisies shut gold sadness in2 ,and some do hang the head for lack of light1 ,sick almost unto death with absence-blight8-- ,thy memory then1 warm-lingering in the ground1 ,mourned dewy in the air1 keeps their hearts sound1 ,till fresh with day their lapsed life begin4 #ba4 ,all things are shadows of the shining true3 ,sun1 sea1 and air--close1 potent1 hurtless fire-- ,flowers from their mother's prison--dove1 and dew-- ,every thing holds a slender guiding clue ,back to the mighty oneness3--hearts of faith ,know thee than light1 than heat1 endlessly nigher1 ,our life's life1 carpenter of ,nazareth4 #bb4 ,sometimes1 perhaps1 the spiritual blood runs slow1 ,and soft along the veins of will doth flow1 ,seeking ,god's arteries from which it came4 ,or does the etherial1 creative flame ,turn back upon itself1 and latent grow8-- ,it matters not what figure or what name1 ,if thou art in me1 and ,i am not to blame4 #bc4 ,in such ,god-silence1 the soul's nest1 so long ,as all is still1 no flutter and no song1 ,is safe4 ,but if my soul begin to act ,without some waking to the eternal fact ,that my dear life is hid with ,christ in ,god-- ,i think and move a creature of earth's clod1 ,stand on the finite1 act upon the wrong4 #bd4 ,my soul this sermon hence for itself prepares3-- ,then is there nothing vile thou mayst not do1 ,buffeted in a tumult of low cares1 ,and treacheries of the old man 'gainst the new4-- ,lord1 in my spirit let thy spirit move1 ,warning1 that it may not have to reprove3-- ,in my dead moments1 master1 stir the prayers4 #be4 ,lord1 let my soul o'erburdened then feel thee ,thrilling through all its brain's stupidity4 ,if ,i must slumber1 heedless of ill harms1 ,let it not be but in my ,father's arms2 ,outside the shelter of his garment's fold1 ,all is a waste1 a terror-haunted wold4-- ,lord1 keep me4 ',tis thy child that cries4 ,behold4 #bf4 ,some say that thou their endless love host won ,by deeds for them which ,i may not believe ,thou ever didst1 or ever willedst done3 ,what matter1 so they love thee8 ,they receive ,eternal more than the poor loom and wheel ,of their invention ever wove and spun4-- ,i love thee for ,i must1 thine all from head to heel4 #bg4 ,the love of thee will set all notions right4 ,right save by love no thought can be or may2 ,only love's knowledge is the primal light4 ,questions keep camp along love's shining coast-- ,challenge my love and would my entrance stay3 ,across the buzzing1 doubting1 challenging host1 ,i rush to thee1 and cling1 and cry--,thou know'st4 #bh4 ,oh1 let me live in thy realities1 ,nor substitute my notions for thy facts1 ,notion with notion making leagues and pacts2 ,they are to truth but as dream-deeds to acts1 ,and questioned1 make me doubt of everything4-- ,o ,lord1 my ,god1 my heart gets up and cries1 ,come thy own self1 and with thee my faith bring4 #bi4 ,o master1 my desires to work1 to know1 ,to be aware that ,i do live and grow-- ,all restless wish for anything not thee1 ,i yield1 and on thy altar offer me4 ,let me no more from out thy presence go1 ,but keep me waiting watchful for thy will-- ,even while ,i do it1 waiting watchful still4 #cj4 ,thou art the ,lord of life1 the secret thing4 ,thou wilt give endless more than ,i could find1 ,even if without thee ,i could go and seek2 ,for thou art one1 ,christ1 with my deepest mind1 ,duty alive1 self-willed1 in me dost speak1 ,and to a deeper purer being sting3 ,i come to thee1 my life1 my causing kind4 #ca4 ,nothing is alien in thy world immense-- ,no look of sky or earth or man or beast2 ,in the great hand of ,god ,i stand1 and thence ,look out on life1 his endless1 holy feast4 ,to try to feel is but to court despair1 ,to dig for a sun within a garden-fence3 ,who does thy will1 ,o ,god1 he lives upon thy air4 ,,august4 #a4 ,,so shall abundant entrance me be given ,into the truth1 my life's inheritance4 ,lo6 as the sun shoots straight from out his tomb1 ,god-floated1 casting round a lordly glance ,into the corners of his endless room1 ,so1 through the rent which thou1 ,o ,christ1 hast riven1 ,i enter liberty's divine expanse4 #b4 ,it will be so--ah1 so it is not now6 ,who seeks thee for a little lazy peace1 ,then1 like a man all weary of the plough1 ,that leaves it standing in the furrow's crease1 ,turns from thy presence for a foolish while1 ,till comes again the rasp of unrest's file1 ,from liberty is distant many a mile4 #c4 ,like one that stops1 and drinks1 and turns1 and goes ,into a land where never water flows1 ,there travels on1 the dry and thirsty day1 ,until the hot night veils the farther way1 ,then turns and finds again the bubbling pool-- ,here would ,i build my house1 take up my stay1 ,nor ever leave my ,sychar's margin cool4 #d4 ,keep me1 ,lord1 with thee4 ,i call from out the dark-- ,hear in thy light1 of which ,i am a spark4 ,i know not what is mine and what is thine-- ,of branch and stem ,i miss the differing mark-- ,but if a mere hair's-breadth me separateth1 ,that hair's-breadth is eternal1 infinite death4 ,for sap thy dead branch calls1 ,o living vine6 #e4 ,i have no choice1 ,i must do what ,i can2 ,but thou dost me1 and all things else as well2 ,thou wilt take care thy child shall grow a man4 ,rouse thee1 my faith2 be king2 with life be one2 ,to trust in ,god is action's highest kind2 ,who trusts in ,god1 his heart with life doth swell2 ,faith opens all the windows to ,god's wind4 #f4 ,o ,father1 thou art my eternity4 ,not on the clasp ,of consciousness--on thee ,my life depends2 and ,i can well afford ,all to forget1 so thou remember1 ,lord4 ,in thee ,i rest2 in sleep thou dost me fold2 ,in thee ,i labour2 still in thee1 grow old2 ,and dying1 shall ,i not in thee1 my ,life1 be bold8 #g4 ,in holy things may be unholy greed4 ,thou giv'st a glimpse of many a lovely thing1 ,not to be stored for use in any mind1 ,but only for the present spiritual need4 ,the holiest bread1 if hoarded1 soon will breed ,the mammon-moth1 the having-pride1 ,i find4 ',tis momently thy heart gives out heart-quickening4 #h4 ,it is thyself1 and neither this nor that1 ,nor anything1 told1 taught1 or dreamed of thee1 ,that keeps us live4 ,the holy maid who sat ,low at thy feet1 choosing the better part1 ,rising1 bore with her--what a memory6 ,yet1 brooding only on that treasure1 she ,had soon been roused by conscious loss of heart4 #i4 ,i am a fool when ,i would stop and think1 ,and lest ,i lose my thoughts1 from duty shrink4 ,it is but avarice in another shape4 ',tis as the vine-branch were to hoard the grape1 ,nor trust the living root beneath the sod4 ,what trouble is that child to thee1 my ,god1 ,who sips thy gracious cup1 and will not drink6 #aj4 ,true1 faithful action only is the life1 ,the grapes for which we feel the pruning knife4 ,thoughts are but leaves2 they fall and feed the ground4 ,the holy seasons1 swift and slow1 go round2 ,the ministering leaves return1 fresh1 large1 and rife-- ,but fresher1 larger1 more thoughts to the brain3-- ,farewell1 my dove6--come back1 hope-laden1 through the rain4 #aa4 ,well may this body poorer1 feebler grow6 ,it is undressing for its last sweet bed2 ,but why should the soul1 which death shall never know1 ,authority1 and power1 and memory shed8 ,it is that love with absolute faith would wed2 ,god takes the inmost garments off his child1 ,to have him in his arms1 naked and undefiled4 #ab4 ,thou art my knowledge and my memory1 ,no less than my real1 deeper life1 my love4 ,i will not fool1 degrade myself to trust ,in less than that which maketh me say ,me1 ,in less than that causing itself to be4 ,then art within me1 behind1 beneath1 above-- ,i will be thine because ,i may and must4 #ac4 ,thou art the truth1 the life4 ,thou1 ,lord1 wilt see ,to every question that perplexes me4 ,i am thy being2 and my dignity ,is written with my name down in thy book2 ,thou wilt care for it4 ,never shall ,i think ,of anything that thou mightst overlook3-- ,in faith-born triumph at thy feet ,i sink4 #ad4 ,thou carest more for that which ,i call mine1 ,in same sort--better manner than ,i could1 ,even if ,i knew creation's ends divine1 ,rousing in me this vague desire of good4 ,thou art more to me than my desires' whole brood2 ,thou art the only person1 and ,i cry ,unto the father ,i of this my ,i4 #ae4 ,thou who inspirest prayer1 then bend'st thine ear2 ,it1 crying with love's grand respect to hear6 ,i cannot give myself to thee aright-- ,with the triumphant uttermost of gift2 ,that cannot be till ,i am full of light-- ,to perfect deed a perfect will must lift3-- ,inspire1 possess1 compel me1 first of every might4 #af4 ,i do not wonder men can ill believe ,who make poor claims upon thee1 perfect ,lord2 ,then most ,i trust when most ,i would receive4 ,i wonder not that such do pray and grieve-- ,the ,god they think1 to be ,god is not fit4 ,then only in thy glory ,i seem to sit1 ,when my heart claims from thine an infinite accord4 #ag4 ,more life ,i need ere ,i myself can be4 ,sometimes1 when the eternal tide ebbs low1 ,a moment weary of my life ,i grow-- ,weary of my existence' self1 ,i mean1 ,not of its plodding1 not its wind and snow ,then to thy knee trusting ,i turn1 and lean3 ,thou will'st ,i live1 and ,i do will with thee4 #ah4 ,dost thou mean sometimes that we should forget thee1 ,dropping the veil of things 'twixt thee and us8-- ,ah1 not that we should lose thee and regret thee6 ,but that1 we turning from our windows thus1 ,the frost-fixed ,god should vanish from the pane1 ,sun-melted1 and a moment1 ,father1 let thee ,look like thyself straight into heart and brain4 #ai4 ,for sometimes when ,i am busy among men1 ,with heart and brain an open thoroughfare ,for faces1 words1 and thoughts other than mine1 ,and a pause comes at length--oh1 sudden then1 ,back throbs the tide with rush exultant rare2 ,and for a gentle moment ,i divine ,thy dawning presence flush my tremulous air4 #bj4 ,if ,i have to forget thee1 do thou see ,it be a good1 not bad forgetfulness2 ,that all its mellow1 truthful air be free ,from dusty noes1 and soft with many a yes2 ,that as thy breath my life1 my life may be ,man's breath4 ,so when thou com'st at hour unknown1 ,thou shalt find nothing in me but thine own4 #ba4 ,thou being in me1 in my deepest me1 ,through all the time ,i do not think of thee1 ,shall ,i not grow at last so true within ,as to forget thee and yet never sin8 ,shall ,i not walk the loud world's busy way1 ,yet in thy palace-porch sit all the day8 ,not conscious think of thee1 yet never from thee stray8 #bb4 ,forget6--,oh1 must it be8--,would it were rather ,that every sense was so filled with my father ,that not in anything could ,i forget him1 ,but deepest1 highest must in all things set him6-- ,yet if thou think in me1 ,god1 what great matter ,though my poor thought to former break and latter-- ,as now my best thoughts2 break1 before thee foiled1 and scatter6 #bc4 ,some way there must be of my not forgetting1 ,and thither thou art leading me1 my ,god4 ,the child that1 weary of his mother's petting1 ,runs out the moment that his feet are shod1 ,may see her face in every flower he sees1 ,and she1 although beyond the window sitting1 ,be nearer him than when he sat upon her knees4 #bd4 ,what if1 when ,i at last1 at the long last1 ,shall see thy face1 my ,lord1 my life's delight1 ,it should not be the face that hath been glassed ,in poor imagination's mirror slight6 ,will my soul sink1 and shall ,i stand aghast1 ,beggared of hope1 my heart a conscious blight1 ,amazed and lost--death's bitterness come and not passed8 #be4 ,ah1 no6 for from thy heart the love will press1 ,and shining from thy perfect human face1 ,will sink into me like the father's kiss2 ,and deepening wide the gulf of consciousness ,beyond imagination's lowest abyss1 ,will1 with the potency of creative grace1 ,lord it throughout the larger thinking place4 #bf4 ,thus ,god-possessed1 new born1 ah1 not for long ,should ,i the sight behold1 beatified1 ,know it creating in me1 feel the throng ,of speechless hopes out-throbbing like a tide1 ,and my heart rushing1 borne aloft the flood1 ,to offer at his feet its living blood-- ,ere1 glory-hid1 the other face ,i spied4 #bg4 ,for out imagination is1 in small1 ,and with the making-difference that must be1 ,mirror of ,god's creating mirror2 all ,that shows itself therein1 that formeth he1 ,and there is ,christ1 no bodiless vanity1 ,though1 face to face1 the mighty perfectness ,with glory blurs the dim-reflected less4 #bh4 ,i clasp thy feet1 ,o father of the living6 ,thou wilt not let my fluttering hopes be more1 ,or lovelier1 or greater1 than thy giving6 ,surely thy ships will bring to my poor shore1 ,of gold and peacocks such a shining store ,as will laugh all the dreams to holy scorn1 ,of love and sorrow that were ever born4 #bi4 ,sometimes it seems pure natural to trust1 ,and trust right largely1 grandly1 infinitely1 ,daring the splendour of the giver's part2 ,at other times1 the whole earth is but dust1 ,the sky is dust1 yea1 dust the human heart2 ,then art thou nowhere1 there is no room for thee ,in the great dust-heap of eternity4 #cj4 ,but why should it be possible to mistrust-- ,nor possible only1 but its opposite hard8 ,why should not man believe because he must-- ,by sight's compulsion8 ,why should he be scarred ,with conflict8 worn with doubting fine and long8-- ,no man is fit for heaven's musician throng ,who has not tuned an instrument all shook and jarred4 #ca4 ,therefore1 ,o ,lord1 when all things common seem1 ,when all is dust1 and self the centre clod1 ,when grandeur is a hopeless1 foolish dream1 ,and anxious care more reasonable than ,god1-- ,out of the ashes ,i will call to thee-- ,in spite of dead distrust call earnestly3-- ,oh thou who livest1 call1 then answer dying me4 ,,september4 #a4 ,,we are a shadow and a shining1 we6 ,one moment nothing seems but what we see1 ,nor aught to rule but common circumstance-- ,nought is to seek but praise1 to shun but chance2 ,a moment more1 and ,god is all in all1 ,and not a sparrow from its nest can fall ,but from the ground its chirp goes up into his hall4 #b4 ,i know at least which is the better mood4 ,when on a heap of cares ,i sit and brood1 ,like ,job upon his ashes1 sorely vext1 ,i feel a lower thing than when ,i stood ,the world's true heir1 fearless as1 on its stalk1 ,a lily meeting ,jesus in his walk3 ,i am not all mood--,i can judge betwixt4 #c4 ,such differing moods can scarce to one belong2 ,shall the same fountain sweet and bitter yield8 ,shall what bore late the dust-mood1 think and brood ,till it bring forth the great believing mood8 ,or that which bore the grand mood1 bald and peeled1 ,sit down to croon the shabby sensual song1 ,to hug itself1 and sink from wrong to meaner wrong8 #d4 ,in the low mood1 the mere man acts alone1 ,moved by impulses which1 if from within1 ,yet far outside the centre man begin2 ,but in the grand mood1 every softest tone ,comes from the living ,god at very heart-- ,from thee who infinite core of being art1 ,thee who didst call our names ere ever we could sin4 #e4 ,there is a coward sparing in the heart1 ,offspring of penury and low-born fear3-- ,prayer must take heed nor overdo its part1 ,asking too much of him with open ear6 ,sinners must wait1 not seek the very best1 ,cry out for peace1 and be of middling cheer3-- ,false heart6 thou cheatest ,god1 and dost thy life molest4 #f4 ,thou hungerest not1 thou thirstest not enough4 ,thou art a temporizing thing1 mean heart4 ,down-drawn1 thou pick'st up straws and wretched stuff1 ,stooping as if the world's floor were the chart ,of the long way thy lazy feet must tread4 ,thou dreamest of the crown hung o'er thy head-- ,but that is safe--thou gatherest hairs and fluff6 #g4 ,man's highest action is to reach up higher1 ,stir up himself to take hold of his sire4 ,then best ,i love you1 dearest1 when ,i go ,and cry to love's life ,i may love you so ,as to content the yearning1 making love1 ,that perfects strength divine in weakness' fire1 ,and from the broken pots calls out the silver dove4 #h4 ,poor am ,i1 ,god knows1 poor as withered leaf2 ,poorer or richer than1 ,i dare not ask4 ,to love aright1 for me were hopeless task1 ,eternities too high to comprehend4 ,but shall ,i tear my heart in hopeless grief1 ,or rise and climb1 and run and kneel1 and bend1 ,and drink the primal love--so love in chief8 #i4 ,then love shall wake and be its own high life4 ,then shall ,i know 'tis ,i that love indeed-- ,ready1 without a moment's questioning strife1 ,to be forgot1 like bursting water-bead1 ,for the high good of the eternal dear2 ,all hope1 all claim1 resting1 with spirit clear1 ,upon the living love that every love doth breed4 #aj4 ,ever seem to fail in utterance4 ,sometimes amid the swift melodious dance ,of fluttering words--as if it had not been1 ,the thought has melted1 vanished into night2 ,sometimes ,i say a thing ,i did not mean1 ,and lo6 'tis better1 by thy ordered chance1 ,than what eluded me1 floating too feathery light4 #aa4 ,if thou wouldst have me speak1 ,lord1 give me speech4 ,so many cries are uttered now-a-days1 ,that scarce a song1 however clear and true1 ,will thread the jostling tumult safe1 and reach ,the ears of men buz-filled with poor denays3 ,barb thou my words with light1 make my song new1 ,and men will hear1 or when ,i sing or preach4 #ab4 ,can anything go wrong with me8 ,i ask-- ,and the same moment1 at a sudden pain1 ,stand trembling4 ,up from the great river's brim ,comes a cold breath2 the farther bank is dim2 ,the heaven is black with clouds and coming rain2 ,high soaring faith is grown a heavy task1 ,and all is wrong with weary heart and brain4 #ac4 ,things do go wrong4 ,i know grief1 pain1 and fear4 ,i see them lord it sore and wide around4 ,from her fair twilight answers ,truth1 star-crowned1 ,things wrong are needful where wrong things abound4 ,things go not wrong2 but ,pain1 with dog and spear1 ,false faith from human hearts will hunt and hound4 ,the earth shall quake 'neath them that trust the solid ground4 #ad4 ,things go not wrong when sudden ,i fall prone1 ,but when ,i snatch my upheld hand from thine1 ,and1 proud or careless1 think to walk alone4 ,then things go wrong1 when ,i1 poor1 silly sheep1 ,to shelves and pits from the good pasture creep2 ,not when the shepherd leaves the ninety and nine1 ,and to the mountains goes1 after the foolish one4 #ae4 ,lo6 now thy swift dogs1 over stone and bush1 ,after me1 straying sheep1 loud barking1 rush4 ,there's ,fear1 and ,shame1 and ,empty-heart1 and ,lack1 ,and ,lost-love1 and a thousand at their back6 ,i see thee not1 but know thou hound'st them on1 ,and ,i am lost indeed--escape is none4 ,see6 there they come1 down streaming on my track6 #af4 ,i rise and run1 staggering--double and run4-- ,but whither8--whither8--whither for escape8 ,the sea lies all about this long-necked cape-- ,there come the dogs1 straight for me every one-- ,me1 live despair1 live centre of alarms6-- ,ah6 lo6 'twixt me and all his barking harms1 ,the shepherd1 lo6--,i run--fall folded in his arms4 #ag4 ,there let the dogs yelp1 let them growl and leap2 ,it is no matter--,i will go to sleep4 ,like a spent cloud pass pain and grief and fear1 ,out from behind it unchanged love shines clear4-- ,oh1 save me1 ,christ6--,i know not what ,i am1 ,i was thy stupid1 self-willed1 greedy lamb1 ,would be thy honest and obedient sheep4 #ah4 ,why is it that so often ,i return ,from social converse with a spirit worn1 ,a lack1 a disappointment--even a sting ,of shame1 as for some low1 unworthy thing8-- ,because ,i have not1 careful1 first of all1 ,set my door open wide1 back to the wall1 ,ere ,i at others' doors did knock and call4 #ai4 ,yet more and more of me thou dost demand2 ,my faith and hope in ,god alone shall stand1 ,the life of law--not trust the rain and sun ,to draw the golden harvest o'er the land4 ,i must not say--,this too will pass and die1 ,the wind will change1 ,round will the seasons run4 ,law is the body of will1 of conscious harmony4 #bj4 ,who trusts a law1 might worship a god of wood2 ,half his soul slumbers1 if it be not dead4 ,he is a live thing shut in chaos crude1 ,hemmed in with dragons--a remorseless head ,still hanging over its uplifted eyes4 ,no2 ,god is all in all1 and nowhere dies-- ,the present heart and thinking will of good4 #ba4 ,law is our schoolmaster4 ,our master1 ,christ1 ,lived under all our laws1 yet always prayed-- ,so walked the water when the storm was highest4-- ,law is ,thy father's2 thou hast it obeyed1 ,and it thereby subject to thee hast made-- ,to rule it1 master1 for thy brethren's sakes3-- ,well may he guide the law by whom law's maker makes4 #bb4 ,death haunts our souls with dissolution's strife2 ,soaks them with unrest2 makes our every breath ,a throe1 not action2 from ,god's purest gift ,wipes off the bloom2 and on the harp of faith ,its fretted strings doth slacken still and shift3 ,life everywhere1 perfect1 and always life1 ,is sole redemption from this haunting death4 #bc4 ,god1 thou from death dost lift me4 ,as ,i rise1 ,its ,lethe from my garment drips and flows4 ,ere long ,i shall be safe in upper air1 ,with thee1 my life--with thee1 my answered prayer ,where thou art ,god in every wind that blows1 ,and self alone1 and ever1 softly dies1 ,there shall my being blossom1 and ,i know it fair4 #bd4 ,i would dig1 ,master1 in no field but thine1 ,would build my house only upon thy rock1 ,yet am but a dull day1 with a sea-sheen6 ,why should ,i wonder then that they should mock1 ,who1 in the limbo of things heard and seen1 ,hither and thither blowing1 lose the shine ,of every light that hangs in the firmament divine4 #be4 ,lord1 loosen in me the hold of visible things2 ,help me to walk by faith and not by sight2 ,i would1 through thickest veils and coverings1 ,see into the chambers of the living light4 ,lord1 in the land of things that swell and seem1 ,help me to walk by the other light supreme1 ,which shows thy facts behind man's vaguely hinting dream4 #bf4 ,i see a little child whose eager hands ,search the thick stream that drains the crowded street ,for possible things hid in its current slow4 ,near by1 behind him1 a great palace stands1 ,where kings might welcome nobles to their feet4 ,soft sounds1 sweet scents1 fair sights there only go-- ,there the child's father lives1 but the child does not know4 #bg4 ,on1 eager1 hungry1 busy-seeking child1 ,rise up1 turn round1 run in1 run up the stair4 ,far in a chamber from rude noise exiled1 ,thy father sits1 pondering how thou dost fare4 ,the mighty man will clasp thee to his breast3 ,will kiss thee1 stroke the tangles of thy hair1 ,and lap thee warm in fold on fold of lovely rest4 #bh4 ,the prince of this world came1 and nothing found ,in thee1 ,o master2 but1 ah1 woe is me6 ,he cannot pass me1 on other business bound1 ,but1 spying in me things familiar1 he ,casts over me the shadow of his flight1 ,and straight ,i moan in darkness--and the fight ,begins afresh betwixt the world and thee4 #bi4 ,in my own heart1 ,o master1 in my thought1 ,betwixt the woolly sheep and hairy goat ,not clearly ,i distinguish2 but ,i think ,thou knowest that ,i fight upon thy side4 ,the how ,i am ashamed of2 for ,i shrink ,from many a blow--am borne on the battle-tide1 ,when ,i should rush to the front1 and take thy foe by the throat4 #cj4 ,the enemy still hath many things in me2 ,yea1 many an evil nest with open hole ,gapes out to him1 at which he enters free4 ,but1 like the impact of a burning coal1 ,his presence mere straight rouses the garrison1 ,and all are up in arms1 and down on knee1 ,fighting and praying till the foe is gone4 ,,october4 #a4 ,,remember1 ,lord1 thou hast not made me good4 ,or if thou didst1 it was so long ago ,i have forgotten--and never understood1 ,i humbly think4 ,at best it was a crude1 ,a rough-hewn goodness1 that did need this woe1 ,this sin1 these harms of all kinds fierce and rude1 ,to shape it out1 making it live and grow4 #b4 ,but thou art making me1 ,i thank thee1 sire4 ,what thou hast done and doest thou know'st well1 ,and ,i will help thee3--gently in thy fire ,i will lie burning2 on thy potter's-wheel ,i will whirl patient1 though my brain should reel2 ,thy grace shall be enough the grief to quell1 ,and growing strength perfect through weakness dire4 #c4 ,i have not knowledge1 wisdom1 insight1 thought1 ,nor understanding1 fit to justify ,thee in thy work1 ,o ,perfect4 ,thou hast brought ,me up to this--and1 lo6 what thou hast wrought1 ,i cannot call it good4 ,but ,i can cry-- ,o enemy1 the maker hath not done2 ,one day thou shalt behold1 and from the sight wilt run4 #d4 ,the faith ,i will1 aside is easily bent2 ,but of thy love1 my ,god1 one glimpse alone ,can make me absolutely confident-- ,with faith1 hope1 joy1 in love responsive blent4 ,my soul then1 in the vision mighty grown1 ,its father and its fate securely known1 ,falls on thy bosom with exultant moan4 #e4 ,thou workest perfectly4 ,and if it seem ,some things are not so well1 'tis but because ,they are too loving-deep1 too lofty-wise1 ,for me1 poor child1 to understand their laws3 ,my highest wisdom half is but a dream2 ,my love runs helpless like a falling stream3 ,thy good embraces ill1 and lo6 its illness dies6 #f4 ,from sleep ,i wake1 and wake to think of thee4 ,but wherefore not with sudden glorious glee8 ,why burst not gracious on me heaven and earth ,in all the splendour of a new-day-birth8 ,why hangs a cloud betwixt my lord and me8 ,the moment that my eyes the morning greet1 ,my soul should panting rush to clasp thy father-feet4 #g4 ,is it because it is not thou ,i see1 ,but only my poor1 blotted fancy of thee8 ,oh6 never till thyself reveal thy face1 ,shall ,i be flooded with life's vital grace4 ,oh make my mirror-heart thy shining-place1 ,and then my soul1 awaking with the morn1 ,shall be a waking joy1 eternally new-born4 #h4 ,lord1 in my silver is much metal base1 ,else should my being by this time have shown ,thee thy own self therein4 ,therefore do ,i ,wake in the furnace4 ,i know thou sittest by1 ,refining--look1 keep looking in to try ,thy silver2 master1 look and see thy face1 ,else here ,i lie for ever1 blank as any stone4 #i4 ,but when in the dim silver thou dost look1 ,i do behold thy face1 though blurred and faint4 ,oh joy6 no flaw in me thy grace will brook1 ,but still refine3 slow shall the silver pass ,from bright to brighter1 till1 sans spot or taint1 ,love1 well content1 shall see no speck of brass1 ,and ,i his perfect face shall hold as in a glass4 #aj4 ,with every morn my life afresh must break ,the crust of self1 gathered about me fresh2 ,that thy wind-spirit may rush in and shake ,the darkness out of me1 and rend the mesh ,the spider-devils spin out of the flesh-- ,eager to net the soul before it wake1 ,that it may slumberous lie1 and listen to the snake4 #aa4 ',tis that ,i am not good--that is enough2 ,i pry no farther--that is not the way4 ,here1 ,o my potter1 is thy making stuff6 ,set thy wheel going2 let it whir and play4 ,the chips in me1 the stones1 the straws1 the sand1 ,cast them out with fine separating hand1 ,and make a vessel of thy yielding clay4 #ab4 ,what if it take a thousand years to make me1 ,so me he leave not1 angry1 on the floor6-- ,nay1 thou art never angry6--that would break me6 ,would ,i tried never thy dear patience sore1 ,but were as good as thou couldst well expect me1 ,whilst thou dost make1 ,i mar1 and thou correct me6 ,then were ,i now content1 waiting for something more4 #ac4 ,only1 my ,god1 see thou that ,i content thee-- ,oh1 take thy own content upon me1 ,god6 ,ah1 never1 never1 sure1 wilt thou repent thee1 ,that thou hast called thy ,adam from the clod6 ,yet must ,i mourn that thou shouldst ever find me ,one moment sluggish1 needing more of the rod ,than thou didst think when thy desire designed me4 #ad4 ,my ,god1 it troubles me ,i am not better4 ,more help1 ,i pray1 still more4 ,thy perfect debtor ,i shall be when thy perfect child ,i am grown4 ,my ,father1 help me--am ,i not thine own8 ,lo1 other lords have had dominion o'er me1 ,but now thy will alone ,i set before me3 ,thy own heart's life--,lord1 thou wilt not abhor me6 #ae4 ,in youth1 when once again ,i had set out ,to find thee1 ,lord1 my life1 my liberty1 ,a window now and then1 clouds all about1 ,would open into heaven3 my heart forlorn ,first all would tremble with a solemn glee1 ,then1 whelmed in peace1 rest like a man outworn1 ,that sees the dawn slow part the closed lids of the morn4 #af4 ,now ,i grow old1 and the soft-gathered years ,have calmed1 yea dulled the heart's swift fluttering beat2 ,but a quiet hope that keeps its household seat ,is better than recurrent glories fleet4 ,to know thee1 ,lord1 is worth a many tears2 ,and when this mildew1 age1 has dried away1 ,my heart will beat again as young and strong and gay4 #ag4 ,stronger and gayer tenfold6--but1 ,o friends1 ,not for itself1 nor any hoarded bliss4 ,i see but vaguely whither my being tends1 ,all vaguely spy a glory shadow-blent1 ,vaguely desire the individual kiss2 ,but when ,i think of ,god1 a large content ,fills the dull air of my gray cloudy tent4 #ah4 ,father of me1 thou art my bliss secure4 ,make of me1 maker1 whatsoe'er thou wilt4 ,let fancy's wings hang moulting1 hope grow poor1 ,and doubt steam up from where a joy was spilt-- ,i lose no time to reason it plain and clear1 ,but fly to thee1 my life's perfection dear3-- ,not what ,i think1 but what thou art1 makes sure4 #ai4 ,this utterance of spirit through still thought1 ,this forming of heart-stuff in moulds of brain1 ,is helpful to the soul by which 'tis wrought1 ,the shape reacting on the heart again2 ,but when ,i am quite old1 and words are slow1 ,like dying things that keep their holes for woe1 ,and memory's withering tendrils clasp with effort vain8 #bj4 ,thou1 then as now1 no less wilt be my life1 ,and ,i shall know it better than before1 ,praying and trusting1 hoping1 claiming more4 ,from effort vain1 sick foil1 and bootless strife1 ,i shall1 with childness fresh1 look up to thee2 ,thou1 seeing thy child with age encumbered sore1 ,wilt round him bend thine arm more carefully4 #ba4 ,and when grim ,death doth take me by the throat1 ,thou wilt have pity on thy handiwork2 ,thou wilt not let him on my suffering gloat1 ,but draw my soul out--gladder than man or boy1 ,when thy saved creatures from the narrow ark ,rushed out1 and leaped and laughed and cried for joy1 ,and the great rainbow strode across the dark4 #bb4 ,against my fears1 my doubts1 my ignorance1 ,i trust in thee1 ,o father of my ,lord6 ,the world went on in this same broken dance1 ,when1 worn and mocked1 he trusted and adored3 ,i too will trust1 and gather my poor best ,to face the truth-faced false4 ,so in his nest ,i shall awake at length1 a little scarred and scored4 #bc4 ,things cannot look all right so long as ,i ,am not all right who see--therefore not right ,can see4 ,the lamp within sends out the light ,which shows the things2 and if its rays go wry1 ,or are not white1 they must part show a lie4 ,the man1 half-cured1 did men not trees conclude1 ,because he moving saw what else had seemed a wood4 #bd4 ,give me1 take from me1 as thou wilt4 ,i learn-- ,slowly and stubbornly ,i learn to yield ,with a strange hopefulness4 ,as from the field ,of hard-fought battle won1 the victor chief ,turns thankfully1 although his heart do yearn1 ,so from my old things to thy new ,i turn1 ,with sad1 thee-trusting heart1 and not in grief4 #be4 ,if with my father ,i did wander free1 ,floating o'er hill and field where'er we would1 ,and1 lighting on the sward before the door1 ,strange faces through the window-panes should see1 ,and strange feet standing where the loved had stood1 ,the dear old place theirs all1 as ours before-- ,should ,i be sorrowful1 father1 having thee8 #bf4 ,so1 ,lord1 if thou tak'st from me all the rest1 ,thyself with each resumption drawing nigher1 ,it shall but hurt me as the thorn of the briar1 ,when ,i reach to the pale flower in its breast4 ,to have thee1 ,lord1 is to have all thy best1 ,holding it by its very life divine-- ,to let my friend's hand go1 and take his heart in mine4 #bg4 ,take from me leisure1 all familiar places2 ,take all the lovely things of earth and air ,take from me books2 take all my precious faces2 ,take words melodious1 and their songful linking2 ,take scents1 and sounds1 and all thy outsides fair2 ,draw nearer1 taking1 and1 to my sober thinking1 ,thou bring'st them nearer all1 and ready to my prayer4 #bh4 ,no place on earth henceforth ,i shall count strange1 ,for every place belongeth to my ,christ4 ,i will go calm where'er thou bid'st me range2 ,whoe'er my neighbour1 thou art still my nighest4 ,oh my heart's life1 my owner1 will of my being6 ,into my soul thou every moment diest1 ,in thee my life thus evermore decreeing4 #bi4 ,what though things change and pass1 nor come again6 ,thou1 the life-heart of all things1 changest never4 ,the sun shines on2 the fair clouds turn to rain1 ,and glad the earth with many a spring and river4 ,the hearts that answer change with chill and shiver1 ,that mourn the past1 sad-sick1 with hopeless pain1 ,they know not thee1 our changeless heart and brain4 #cj4 ,my halting words will some day turn to song-- ,some far-off day1 in holy other times6 ,the melody now prisoned in my rimes ,will one day break aloft1 and from the throng ,of wrestling thoughts and words spring up the air2 ,as from the flower its colour's sweet despair ,issues in odour1 and the sky's low levels climbs4 #ca4 ,my surgent thought shoots lark-like up to thee4 ,thou like the heaven art all about the lark4 ,whatever ,i surmise or know in me1 ,idea1 or but symbol on the dark1 ,is living1 working1 thought-creating power ,in thee1 the timeless father of the hour4 ,i am thy book1 thy song--thy child would be4 ,,november #a4 ,,thou art of this world1 ,christ4 ,thou know'st it all2 ,thou know'st our evens1 our morns1 our red and gray2 ,how moons1 and hearts1 and seasons rise and fall2 ,how we grow weary plodding on the way2 ,of future joy how present pain bereaves1 ,rounding us with a dark of mere decay1 ,tossed with a drift ,of summer-fallen leaves4 #b4 ,thou knowest all our weeping1 fainting1 striving2 ,thou know'st how very hard it is to be2 ,how hard to rouse faint will not yet reviving2 ,to do the pure thing1 trusting all to thee2 ,to hold thou art there1 for all no face we see2 ,how hard to think1 through cold and dark and dearth1 ,that thou art nearer now than when eye-seen on earth4 #c4 ,have pity on us for the look of things1 ,when blank denial stares us in the face4 ,although the serpent mask have lied before1 ,it fascinates the bird that darkling sings1 ,and numbs the little prayer-bird's beating wings4 ,for how believe thee somewhere in blank space1 ,if through the darkness come no knocking to our door8 #d4 ,if we might sit until the darkness go1 ,possess our souls in patience perhaps we might2 ,but there is always something to be done1 ,and no heart left to do it4 ,to and fro ,the dull thought surges1 as the driven waves fight ,in gulfy channels4 ,oh6 victorious one1 ,give strength to rise1 go out1 and meet thee in the night4 #e4 ,wake1 thou that sleepest2 rise up from the dead1 ,and ,christ will give thee light4 ,i do not know ,what sleep is1 what is death1 or what is light2 ,but ,i am waked enough to feel a woe1 ,to rise and leave death4 ,stumbling through the night1 ,to my dim lattice1 ,o calling ,christ6 ,i go1 ,and out into the dark look for thy star-crowned head4 #f4 ,there are who come to me1 and write1 and send1 ,whom ,i would love1 giving good things to all1 ,but friend--that name ,i cannot on them spend2 ',tis from the centre of self-love they call ,for cherishing--for which they first must know ,how to be still1 and take the seat that's low3 ,when1 ,lord1 shall ,i be fit--when wilt thou call me friend8 #g4 ,wilt thou not one day1 ,lord8 ,in all my wrong1 ,self-love and weakness1 laziness and fear1 ,this one thing ,i can say3 ,i am content ,to be and have what in thy heart ,i am meant ,to be and have4 ,in my best times ,i long ,after thy will1 and think it glorious-dear2 ,even in my worst1 perforce my will to thine is bent4 #h4 ,my ,god1 ,i look to thee for tenderness ,such as ,i could not seek from any man1 ,or in a human heart fancy or plan-- ,a something deepest prayer will not express3 ,lord1 with thy breath blow on my being's fires1 ,until1 even to the soul with self-love wan1 ,i yield the primal love1 that no return desires4 #i4 ,only no word of mine must ever foster ,the self that in a brother's bosom gnaws2 ,i may not fondle failing1 nor the boaster ,encourage with the breath of my applause4 ,weakness needs pity1 sometimes love's rebuke2 ,strength only sympathy deserves and draws-- ,and grows by every faithful loving look4 #aj4 ',tis but as men draw nigh to thee1 my ,lord1 ,they can draw nigh each other and not hurt4 ,who with the gospel of thy peace are girt1 ,the belt from which doth hang the ,spirit's sword1 ,shall breathe on dead bones1 and the bones shall live1 ,sweet poison to the evil self shall give1 ,and1 clean themselves1 lift men clean from the mire abhorred4 #aa4 ,my ,lord1 ,i have no clothes to come to thee2 ,my shoes are pierced and broken with the road2 ,i am torn and weathered1 wounded with the goad1 ,and soiled with tugging at my weary load3 ,the more ,i need thee6 ,a very prodigal ,i stagger into thy presence1 ,lord of me3 ,one look1 my ,christ1 and at thy feet ,i fall6 #ab4 ,why should ,i still hang back1 like one in a dream1 ,who vainly strives to clothe himself aright1 ,that in great presence he may seemly seem8 ,why call up feeling8--dress me in the faint1 ,worn1 faded1 cast-off nimbus of some saint8 ,why of old mood bring back a ghostly gleam-- ,while there ,he waits1 love's heart and loss's blight6 #ac4 ,son of the ,father1 elder brother mine1 ,see thy poor brother's plight2 ,see how he stands ,defiled and feeble1 hanging down his hands6 ,make me clean1 brother1 with thy burning shine2 ,from thy rich treasures1 householder divine1 ,bring forth fair garments1 old and new1 ,i pray1 ,and like thy brother dress me1 in the old home-bred way4 #ad4 ,my prayer-bird was cold--would not away1 ,although ,i set it on the edge of the nest4 ,then ,i bethought me of the story old-- ,love-fact or loving fable1 thou know'st best-- ,how1 when the children had made sparrows of clay1 ,thou mad'st them birds1 with wings to flutter and fold3 ,take1 ,lord1 my prayer in thy hand1 and make it pray4 #ae4 ,my poor clay-sparrow seems turned to a stone1 ,and from my heart will neither fly nor run4 ,i cannot feel as thou and ,i both would1 ,but1 ,father1 ,i am willing--make me good4 ,what art thou father for1 but to help thy son8 ,look deep1 yet deeper1 in my heart1 and there1 ,beyond where ,i can feel1 read thou the prayer4 #af4 ,oh what it were to be right sure of thee6 ,sure that thou art1 and the same as thy son1 ,jesus6 ,oh1 faith is deeper1 wider than the sea1 ,yea1 than the blue of heaven that ever flees us6 ,yet simple as the cry of sore-hurt child1 ,or as his shout1 with sudden gladness wild1 ,when home from school he runs1 till morn set free4 #ag4 ,if ,i were sure thou1 ,father1 verily art1 ,true father of the ,nazarene as true1 ,sure as ,i am of my wife's shielding heart1 ,sure as of sunrise in the watching blue1 ,sure as ,i am that ,i do eat and drink1 ,and have a heart to love and laugh and think1 ,meseems in flame the joy might from my body start4 #ah4 ,but ,i must know thee in a deeper way ,than any of these ways1 or know thee not2 ,my heart at peace far loftier proof must lay ,than if the wind thou me the wave didst roll1 ,than if ,i lay before thee a sunny spot1 ,or knew thee as the body knows its soul1 ,or even as the part doth know its perfect whole4 #ai4 ,there is no word to tell how ,i must know thee2 ,no wind clasped ever a low meadow-flower ,so close that as to nearness it could show thee2 ,no rainbow so makes one the sun and shower4 ,a something with thee1 ,i am a nothing fro' thee4 ,because ,i am not save as ,i am in thee1 ,my soul is ever setting out to win thee4 #bj4 ,i know not how--for that ,i first must know thee4 ,i know ,i know thee not as ,i would know thee1 ,for my heart burns like theirs that did not know him1 ,till he broke bread1 and therein they must know him4 ,i know thee1 knowing that ,i do not know thee1 ,nor ever shall till one with me ,i know thee-- ,even as thy son1 the eternal man1 doth know thee4 #ba4 ,creation under me1 in1 and above1 ,slopes upward from the base1 a pyramid1 ,on whose point ,i shall stand at last1 and love4 ,from the first rush of vapour at thy will1 ,to the last poet-word that darkness chid1 ,thou hast been sending up creation's hill1 ,to lift thy souls aloft in faithful ,godhead free4 #bb4 ,i think my thought1 and fancy ,i think thee4-- ,lord1 wake me up2 rend swift my coffin-planks2 ,i pray thee1 let me live--alive and free4 ,my soul will break forth in melodious thanks1 ,aware at last what thou wouldst have it be1 ,when thy life shall be light in me1 and when ,my life to thine is answer and amen4 #bc4 ,how oft ,i say the same things in these lines6 ,even as a man1 buried in during dark1 ,turns ever where the edge of twilight shines1 ,prays ever towards the vague eternal mark2 ,or as the sleeper1 having dreamed he drinks1 ,back straightway into thirstful dreaming sinks1 ,so turns my will to thee1 for thee still longs1 still pines4 #bd4 ,the mortal man1 all careful1 wise1 and troubled1 ,the eternal child in the nursery doth keep4 ,to-morrow on to-day the man heaps doubled2 ,the child laughs1 hopeful1 even in his sleep4 ,the man rebukes the child for foolish trust2 ,the child replies1 ,thy care is for poor dust2 ,be still1 and let me wake that thou mayst sleep4 #be4 ,till ,i am one1 with oneness manifold1 ,i must breed contradiction1 strife1 and doubt2 ,things tread ,thy court--look real--take proving hold-- ,my ,christ is not yet grown to cast them out2 ,alas6 to me1 false-judging 'twixt the twain1 ,the ,unseen oft fancy seems1 while1 all about1 ,the ,seen doth lord it with a mighty train4 #bf4 ,but when the ,will hath learned obedience royal1 ,he straight will set the child upon the throne2 ,to whom the seen things all1 grown instant loyal1 ,will gather to his feet1 in homage prone-- ,the child their master they have ever known2 ,then shall the visible fabric plainly lean ,on a ,reality that never can be seen4 #bg4 ,thy ways are wonderful1 maker of men6 ,thou gavest me a child1 and ,i have fed ,and clothed and loved her1 many a growing year2 ,lo6 now a friend of months draws gently near1 ,and claims her future--all beyond his ken-- ,there he hath never loved her nor hath led3 ,she weeps and moans1 but turns1 and leaves her home so dear4 #bh4 ,she leaves1 but not forsakes4 ,oft in the night1 ,oft at mid-day when all is still around1 ,sudden will rise1 in dim pathetic light1 ,some childish memory of household bliss1 ,or sorrow by love's service robed and crowned2 ,rich in his love1 she yet will sometimes miss ,the mother's folding arms1 the mother's sealing kiss4 #bi4 ,then first1 ,i think1 our eldest-born1 although ,loving1 devoted1 tender1 watchful1 dear1 ,the innermost of home-bred love shall know6 ,yea1 when at last the janitor draws near1 ,a still1 pale joy will through the darkness go1 ,at thought of lying in those arms again1 ,which once were heaven enough for any pain4 #cj4 ,by love doth love grow mighty in its love3 ,once thou shalt love us1 child1 as we love thee4 ,father of loves1 is it not thy decree ,that1 by our long1 far-wandering remove ,from thee1 our life1 our home1 our being blest1 ,we learn at last to love thee true and best1 ,and rush with all our loves back to thy infinite rest8 ,,december4 #a4 ,i ,,am a little weary of my life-- ,not thy life1 blessed ,father6 ,or the blood ,too slowly laves the coral shores of thought1 ,or ,i am weary of weariness and strife4 ,open my soul-gates to thy living flood2 ,i ask not larger heart-throbs1 vigour-fraught1 ,i pray thy presence1 with strong patience rife4 #b4 ,i will what thou will'st--only keep me sure ,that thou art willing2 call to me now and then4 ,so1 ceasing to enjoy1 ,i shall endure ,with perfect patience--willing beyond my ken ,beyond my love1 beyond my thinking scope2 ,willing to be because thy will is pure2 ,willing thy will beyond all bounds of hope4 #c4 ,this weariness of mine1 may it not come ,from something that doth need no setting right8 ,shall fruit be blamed if it hang wearily ,a day before it perfected drop plumb ,to the sad earth from off its nursing tree8 ,ripeness must always come with loss of might4 ,the weary evening fall before the resting night4 #d4 ,hither if ,i have come through earth and air1 ,through fire and water--,i am not of them2 ,born in the darkness1 what fair-flashing gem ,would to the earth go back and nestle there8 ,not of this world1 this world my life doth hem2 ,what if ,i weary1 then1 and look to the door1 ,because my unknown life is swelling at the core8 #e4 ,all winged things came from the waters first2 ,airward still many a one from the water springs ,in dens and caves wind-loving things are nursed3-- ,i lie like unhatched bird1 upfolded1 dumb1 ,while all the air is trembling with the hum ,of songs and beating hearts and whirring wings1 ,that call my slumbering life to wake to happy things4 #f4 ,i lay last night and knew not why ,i was sad4 ',tis well with ,god1 ,i said1 and he is the truth2 ,let that content me4--',tis not strength1 nor youth1 ,nor buoyant health1 nor a heart merry-mad1 ,that makes the fact of things wherein men live3 ,he is the life1 and doth my life outgive2 ,in him there is no gloom1 but all is solemn-glad1 #g4 ,i said to myself1 ,lo1 ,i lie in a dream ,of separation1 where there comes no sign2 ,my waking life is hid with ,christ in ,god1 ,where all is true and potent--fact divine4 ,i will not heed the thing that doth but seem2 ,i will be quiet as lark upon the sod2 ,god's will1 the seed1 shall rest in me the pod4 #h4 ,and when that will shall blossom--then1 my ,god1 ,there will be jubilation in a world6 ,the glad lark1 soaring heavenward from the sod1 ,up the swift spiral of its own song whirled1 ,never such jubilation wild out-poured ,as from my soul will break at thy feet1 ,lord1 ,like a great tide from sea-heart shoreward hurled4 #i4 ,for then thou wilt be able1 then at last1 ,to glad me as thou hungerest to do2 ,then shall thy life my heart all open find1 ,a thoroughfare to thy great spirit-wind2 ,then shall ,i rest within thy holy vast1 ,one with the bliss of the eternal mind2 ,and all creation rise in me created new4 #aj4 ,what makes thy being a bliss shall then make mind ,for ,i shall love as thou1 and love in thee2 ,then shall ,i have whatever ,i desire1 ,my every faintest wish being all divine2 ,power thou wilt give me to work mightily1 ,even as my ,lord1 leading thy low men nigher1 ,with dance and song to cast their best upon thy fire4 #aa4 ,then shall ,i live such an essential life ,that a mere flower will then to me unfold ,more bliss than now grandest orchestral strife-- ,by love made and obedience humble-bold1 ,i shall straight through its window ,god behold4 ,god1 ,i shall feed on thee1 thy creature blest ,with very being--work at one with sweetest rest4 #ab4 ,give me a world1 to part for praise and sunder4 ,the brooks be bells2 the winds1 in caverns dumb1 ,wake fife and flute and flageolet and voice2 ,the fire-shook earth itself be the great drum2 ,and let the air the region's bass out thunder2 ,the firs be violins2 the reeds hautboys2 ,rivers1 seas1 icebergs fill the great score up and under6 #ac4 ,but rather dost thou hear the blundered words ,of breathing creatures2 the music-lowing herds ,of thy great cattle2 thy soft-bleating sheep2 ,o'erhovered by the trebles of thy birds1 ,whose ,christ-praised carelessness song-fills the deep2 ,still rather a child's talk who apart doth hide him1 ,and make a tent for ,god to come and sit beside him4 #ad4 ,this is not life2 this being is not enough4 ,but thou art life1 and thou hast life for me4 ,thou mad'st the worm--to cast the wormy slough1 ,and fly abroad--a glory flit and flee4 ,thou hast me1 statue-like1 hewn in the rough1 ,meaning at last to shape me perfectly4 ,lord1 thou hast called me fourth1 ,i turn and call on thee4 #ae4 ',tis thine to make1 mine to rejoice in thine4 ,as1 hungering for his mother's face and eyes1 ,the child throws wide the door1 back to the wall1 ,i run to thee1 the refuge from poor lies3 ,lean dogs behind me whimper1 yelp1 and whine2 ,life lieth ever sick1 ,death's writhing thrall1 ,in slavery endless1 hopeless1 and supine4 #af4 ,the life that hath not willed itself to be1 ,must clasp the life that willed1 and be at peace2 ,or1 like a leaf wind-blown1 through chaos flee2 ,a life-husk into which the demons go1 ,and work their will1 and drive it to and fro2 ,a thing that neither is1 nor yet can cease1 ,which uncreation can alone release4 #ag4 ,but when ,i turn and grasp the making hand1 ,and will the making will1 with confidence ,i ride the crest of the creation-wave1 ,helpless no more1 no more existence' slave2 ,in the heart of love's creating fire ,i stand1 ,and1 love-possessed in heart and soul and sense1 ,take up the making share the making ,master gave4 #ah4 ,that man alone who does the ,father's works ,can be the ,father's son2 yea1 only he ,who sonlike can create1 can ever be2 ,who with ,god wills not1 is no son1 not free4 ,o ,father1 send the demon-doubt that lurks ,behind the hope1 out into the abyss2 ,who trusts in knowledge all its good shall miss4 #ai4 ,thy beasts are sinless1 and do live before thee2 ,thy child is sinful1 and must run to thee4 ,thy angels sin not and in peace adore thee2 ,but ,i must will1 or never more be free4 ,i from thy heart came1 how can ,i ignore thee8-- ,back to my home ,i hurry1 haste1 and flee2 ,there ,i shall dwell1 love-praising evermore thee4 #bj4 ,my holy self1 thy pure ideal1 lies ,calm in thy bosom1 which it cannot leave2 ,my self unholy1 no ideal1 hies ,hither and thither1 gathering store to grieve-- ,not now1 ,o ,father6 now it mounts1 it flies1 ,to join the true self in thy heart that waits1 ,and1 one with it1 be one with all the heavenly mates4 #ba4 ,trusting thee1 ,christ1 ,i kneel1 and clasp thy knee2 ,cast myself down1 and kiss thy brother-feet-- ,one self thou and the ,father's thought of thee6 ,ideal son1 thou hast left the perfect home1 ,ideal brother1 to seek thy brothers come6 ,thou know'st our angels all1 ,god's children sweet1 ,and of each two wilt make one holy child complete4 #bb4 ,to a slow end ,i draw these daily words1 ,nor think such words often to write again-- ,rather1 as light the power to me affords1 ,christ's new and old would to my friends unbind2 ,through words he spoke help to his thought behind2 ,unveil the heart with which he drew his men2 ,set forth his rule o'er devils1 animals1 corn1 and wind4 #bc4 ,i do remember how one time ,i thought1 ,god must be lonely--oh1 so lonely lone6 ,i will be very good to him--ah1 nought ,can reach the heart of his great loneliness6 ,my whole heart ,i will bring him1 with a moan ,that ,i may not come nearer2 ,i will lie prone ,before the awful loveliness in loneliness' excess4 #bd4 ,a ,god must have a ,god for company4 ,and lo6 thou hast the ,son-,god to thy friend4 ,thou honour'st his obedience1 he thy law4 ,into thy secret life-will he doth see2 ,thou fold'st him round in live love perfectly-- ,one two1 without beginning1 without end2 ,in love1 life1 strength1 and truth1 perfect without a flaw4 #be4 ,thou hast not made1 or taught me1 ,lord1 to care ,for times and seasons--but this one glad day ,is the blue sapphire clasping all the lights ,that flash in the girdle of the year so fair-- ,when thou wast born a man1 because alway ,thou wast and art a man1 through all the flights ,of thought1 and time1 and thousandfold creation's play4 #bf4 ,we all are lonely1 ,maker--each a soul ,shut in by itself1 a sundered atom of thee4 ,no two yet loved themselves into a whole2 ,even when we weep together we are two4 ,of two to make one1 which yet two shall be1 ,is thy creation's problem1 deep1 and true1 ,to which thou only hold'st the happy1 hurting clue4 #bg4 ,no less than thou1 ,o ,father1 do we need ,a ,god to friend each lonely one of us4 ,as touch not in the sack two grains of seed1 ,touch no two hearts in great worlds populous4 ,outside the making ,god we cannot meet ,him he has made our brother3 homeward1 thus1 ,to find our kin we first must turn our wandering feet4 #bh4 ,it must be possible that the soul made ,should absolutely meet the soul that makes2 ,then1 in that bearing soul1 meet every other ,there also born1 each sister and each brother4 ,lord1 till ,i meet thee thus1 life is delayed2 ,i am not ,i until that morning breaks1 ,not ,i until my consciousness eternal wakes4 #bi4 ,again ,i shall behold thee1 daughter true2 ,the hour will come when ,i shall hold thee fast ,in ,god's name1 loving thee all through and through4 ,somewhere in his grand thought this waits for us4 ,then shall ,i see a smile not like thy last-- ,for that great thing which came when all was past1 ,was not a smile1 but ,god's peace glorious4 #cj4 ,twilight of the transfiguration-joy1 ,gleam-faced1 pure-eyed1 strong-willed1 high-hearted boy6 ,hardly thy life clear forth of heaven was sent1 ,ere it broke out into a smile1 and went4 ,so swift thy growth1 so true thy goalward bent1 ,thou1 child and sage inextricably blent1 ,wilt one day teach thy father in some heavenly tent #ca4 ,go1 my beloved children1 live your life4 ,wounded1 faint1 bleeding1 never yield the strife4 ,stunned1 fallen-awake1 arise1 and fight again4 ,before you victory stands1 with shining train ,of hopes not credible until they are4 ,beyond morass and mountain swells the star ,of perfect love--the home of longing heart and brain