,,manners ,,and ,,conduct ,,in ,,school ,,and ,,out ,,by ,,the ,,deans ,,of ,,girls ,,in ,,chicago ,,high ,,schools ,the gentle minde by gentle deeds is knowne2 ,for a man by nothing is so well bewrayed ,as by his manners4 --,,spenser ,,allyn ,,and ,,bacon ,,boston ,,new ,,york ,,chicago ,,atlanta ,,san ,,francisco ,,copyright1 #aiba1 ,,by ,,fanny ,r4 ,,smith4 ,norwood ,press ,j4,s4 ,gushing ,co4--,berwick ,smith ,co4 ,norwood1 ,mass41 ,u4,s4,a4 ,,foreword ,the supreme business of the school is to develop a sense of justice1 the power of initiative1 independence of character1 correct social and civic habits1 and the ability to coperate toward the common good4--,dr4 ,frank ,crane4 ,how do you develop correct social habits1 the habits of a gentleman or a lady8 ,you develop correct social habits just as you develop correct habits in playing ball1 or in swimming1--you discover the rules2 then you practise1 practise1 practise4 ,a good general rule is1 ,do what a kind heart prompts2 for1 ,politeness is to do and say ,the kindest thing in the kindest way4 ,we earnestly hope this little book may help girls and boys to become happier1 more agreeable1 and more effective citizens4 ,,the ,,deans ,,of ,,girls1 ,,chicago ,,high ,,schools4 ,,maxims ,,of ,,conduct ,let us have faith that right makes might2 and in that faith let us dare to do our duty as we understand it4 --,,lincoln4 ,whatever is worth doing at all1 is worth doing well4 --,,earl ,,of ,,chesterfield4 ,do not squander time1 for that is the stuff life is made of4 --,,franklin4 ,the secret of success is constancy of purpose4 --,,disraeli4 ,evil communications corrupt good manners4 --,,new ,,testament4 ,be good1 sweet maid1 and let who will be clever2 ,do noble things1 not dream them1 all day long2 ,and so make life1 death1 and that vast forever ,one grand sweet song4 --,,kingsley4 ,vice is a monster of so frightful mien1 ,as to be hated needs but to be seen2 ,yet seen too oft1 familiar with her face1 ,we first endure1 then pity1 then embrace4 --,,pope4 ,in vain we call old notions fudge1 ,and bend our conscience to our dealing2 ,the ,ten ,commandments will not budge1 ,and stealing will continue stealing4 --,,lowell4 ,,greeting ,life is not so short but that there is always time enough for courtesy4 --,emerson4 ,girls1 the word lady should suggest1 ideally1 a girl 7or a woman7 who keeps herself physically fit1 her thinking on a high plane1 and her manners gentle and winsome4 ,boys1 the word gentleman means1 ideally1 a fine1 athletic1 manly fellow who is an all round good sport in the best sense1 and who has manners that do not prevent other people from seeing how fine he is4 ,,the ,,street ,remember this1--that there is a proper dignity and proportion to be observed in the performance of every act of life4 --,marcus ,aurelius4 #a7 ,if you are well brought up1 girls1 you will not loiter on the street to talk to one another2 much less to boys4 ,street visiting is taboo4 #b7 ,boys1 a gentleman does not detain on street corners a girl or woman friend4 ,if he meets one with whom he wishes to speak more than a moment1 he asks permission to walk a little way with her4 ,during the moment that he does detain her1 a gentleman talks with his hat in his hand4 #c7 ,you know that a boy should lift his hat or cap in recognition of a girl or woman acquaintance whom he meets on the street4 ,but perhaps you don't know that the same courtesy may well be offered to a man1 and must be1 if the man is walking with a girl or a woman4 #d7 ,to spit on the street or sidewalk is likely to endanger the health of others1 and to make you seem vulgar and horrid4 ,use your handkerchief4 ,,the ,,street-,,car ,immodest words admit of no defence1 ,for want of decency is want of sense4 --,earl of ,roscommon4 #a7 ,avoid rushing ahead of others to secure a seat in a street-car1 or to secure any other special advantage4 ,some one must be last2 why not you8 ,if advancing out of turn is necessary1 a little deliberation accompanied with1 ,i beg your pardon1 or ,excuse me1 please will most quickly and pleasantly open the way2 otherwise1 respect the line4 #b7 ,in a street-car1 boys1 you should touch your hat politely and offer your seat to a woman1 a girl1 or an elderly man who is standing4 ,your courtesy should be accepted with a bow and1 ,thank you4 #c7 ,girls1 if a seat is offered you1 accept it at once with ,thank you4 ,don't explain that you don't mind standing4 #d7 ,on the street1 in street-cars1 and in all public places1 if your voice or conduct attracts attention you will be considered loud1 common1 vulgar4 #e7 ,the chewing of gum in a street-car1 in church1 or in any other place outside of your own private room stamps you at once as common4 ,,corridors ,liberty exists in proportion to wholesome restraint4 --,webster4 #a7 ,avoid all running in the corridors2 start in time1 and walk4 #b7 ,avoid crowding on stairways4 ,avoid crowding through ,assembly ,hall doors4 ,when in a mass of people1 move slowly and try to keep breathing space about yourself4 #c7 ,avoid tossing paper on to the lockers4 ,avoid dropping it on the floor2 but if paper is there1 train yourself to see it and to pick up at least one piece every time you enter the corridor4 ,this is what ,dr4 ,crane calls a civic habit4 #d7 ,boys1 hats off on entering the building2 don't put them on again before you are at the outer door ready to leave1 even though you should see grown men violating this rule4 #e7 ,hold a door open for a girl or an older person to precede you in passing through2 then glance over your shoulder to prevent the door from swinging back into the face of any person who may be following4 #f7 ,in order to appear to the best advantage1 keep your hands out of your pockets4 #g7 ,try not to jostle one another4 ,if by chance you do1 say1 ,pardon me4 #h7 ,observe1 boys1 that well-bred men rise when addressed by a woman who is standing4 #i7 ,avoid whistling in the school building1 and even in a private home1 for your whistling may be annoying to some who cannot help hearing it4 #aj7 ,never1 never1 be so disgusting as to spit on the floor1 on the stairs1 or into the waste-paper box2 use your handkerchief4 #aa7 ,care for your finger-nails1 your face1 your hair1 in your room at home1 not before mirrors on your locker doors1 or in any other public place4 ,after making your toilet as well as you can1 forget it4 #ab7 ,boys1 it is not necessary to help the girls mount the stairs in school unless they are blind or crippled4 #ac7 ,girls1 it is better not to twine your arms about one another in the corridors and on the stairs2 also1 not to kiss one another tenderly if you separate for a few moments4 ,love your friends dearly2 but be sensible1 not sentimental4 #ad7 ,boys1 observe that the moment a woman or a girl enters a passenger elevator1 gentlemen there remove their hats1--unless conditions prevent4 ,,classroom ,in words1 as fashions1 the same rule will hold1 ,alike fantastic if too new or old3 ,be not the first by whom the new are tried1 ,nor yet the last to lay the old aside4 --,pope4 #a7 ,when you enter your classroom1 as well as when you leave it1 glance towards your teacher and1 if she is looking1 bow pleasantly4 #b7 ,say1 ,yes1 ,miss ,brown2 not merely ,yes1 if you know the name of the one addressed4 ,if you do not know her name1 let your tone and manner indicate so fully your feeling of respect that the omission of the name will not be noted4 ,say ,yes1 ,sir1 to men4 ,and remember1-- ,hearts1 like doors1 will ope with ease ,to very1 very little keys2 ,and don't forget that two of these ,are3 ,thank you1 sir1 and ,if you please4 #c7 ,when sitting1 push back as far as you can in the chair and lean forward from your hips1 keeping your spine straight1 not curved4 ,the way you sit or walk or stand shows culture or lack of it4 #d7 ,when reciting1 stand erect with your hands at your sides4 ,your attitude will invite favorable attention if you stand with one foot slightly in advance of the other1 and the weight of the body on the forward foot4 #e7 ,speak so distinctly that everyone in the room must hear you2 otherwise1 not everyone will get your thought4 #f7 ,avoid raising your hand when you wish to ask or to answer a question4 ,instead1 rise quietly1 face your teacher1 and wait for her to recognize you as though you were at a club meeting4 #g7 ,never tell when another is trying to recite4 ,such telling destroys the other person's chance to think1 and helps to make a sneak of you4 ,,lunch ,,room ,cleanness of body was ever deemed to proceed from a due reverence of ,god4 --,bacon4 #a7 ,see that your hands are clean4 #b7 ,avoid rushing into or through the ,lunch ,room4 ,walk4 #c7 ,when carrying your food to your table1 pay strict attention to getting it to its destination in safety4 #d7 ,eat in the ,lunch ,room1--not in the corridors1 nor in the ,assembly ,hall1 nor on the street4 ,give four excellent reasons for this direction4 #e7 ,eat slowly and noiselessly2 don't feed4 ,avoid talking when your mouth is full4 ,take small mouthfuls1 so that you may talk without giving offense4 ,keep your lips closed when chewing4 ,never use your knife to carry food to your mouth4 #f7 ,in the ,lunch ,room1 as elsewhere1 sit with your knees together and with both of your feet on the floor1 not on the rounds of your chairs4 #g7 ,don't throw paper and refuse into the receptacles provided2 drop it there4 #h7 ,avoid boisterous talking and laughing4 ,the tones of the voice proclaim quite accurately the social background of the boy1 the girl1 the man1 the woman4 ,her voice was ever soft1 ,gentle1 and low1--an excellent thing in woman4 --,,shakespeare4 #i7 ,keep elbows and wraps off the ,lunch ,room tables2 furthermore1 do not sit on the tables4 #aj7 ,leave your place in the ,lunch ,room tidy and spotless1 with your chair pushed up to the table4 #aa7 ,rise when an older person enters the room2 remain standing until your courtesy is acknowledged1 or until the older person is seated4 7,optional with the teacher in the schoolroom47 #ab7 ,boys1 when a girl or an older person drops a pencil1 a book1 or anything of the sort1 pick it up and return it unobtrusively1 but with a little bow4 #ac7 ,avoid rushing from the room when the bell rings4 ,walk4 #ad7 ,open the door1 boys1 but let the girls pass out first1 whenever practicable4 ,when many are passing in opposite directions1 keep to the right4 #ae7 ,never laugh at the accidents or misfortunes of others1 even if they have a ridiculous side4 ,nothing shows ill-breeding so surely4 ,he who laughs at others' woes ,finds few friends and many foes4 ,,the ,,assembly ,,hall ,there is a time for some things1 and a time for all things2 a time for great things1 and a time for small things4 --,cervantes4 ,actions wholly appropriate to the gymnasium or the playground may be quite out of character in the ,assembly ,hall4 ,think about it4 #a7 ,avoid all running1 romping1 and making of unnecessary noise in the ,assembly ,hall4 #b7 ,avoid using the ,assembly ,hall as a thoroughfare4 ,on entering1 take a seat immediately1 and remain in it until the next bell rings4 ,talk in gentle tones4 #c7 ,avoid eating anything in the ,assembly ,hall4 #d7 ,avoid dropping paper on the floor4 ,help to keep the room orderly and tidy4 #e7 ,for a program on the stage1 and for general singing1 gather quietly in the center sections if your ,assembly ,hall is large4 ,you should do this without waiting to be asked4 ,use your judgment4 #f7 ,the appearance on the platform of one who is to speak to you should be your signal for immediate silence and attention4 ,don't wait to be called to order2 call yourselves to order4 #g7 ,sing so well that you make the general singing a delight4 ,you will find it far more fun than trying to spoil the program4 ,why will you8 ,because it is your nature to feel more satisfaction in coperating and helping by doing your best1 than in hindering and thwarting by doing your worst4 7,this is the basis of all good manners1 and of civic spirit47 #h7 ,you should be attentive and silent1 not only when some one is talking to you from the platform and when a number of any kind is being given1 but also during a movie4 ,people who visit while others are trying to entertain them are a public nuisance4 ,don't let yourselves slip into that class4 ,also do not tell the plot of a play or a movie to your neighbor4 #i7 ,never1 in the ,assembly ,hall or in any other place where there is a large group of people1 should you stand and beckon1 whistle1 or hoo-hoo to attract the attention of your friends4 #aj7 ,if you enter the ,assembly ,hall after the program has begun1 find a seat so noiselessly as to escape notice4 #aa7 ,show your appreciation cordially1 but avoid excessive applause4 ,never stamp your feet or whistle4 ,carried beyond a certain point1 applause ceases to be a courtesy4 ,cultivate good taste in this matter4 ,moderation is a mark of good taste4 ,,duty ,,to ,,club ,,or ,,class ,,sponsor ,her air1 her manners1 all who saw admir'd2 ,courteous though coy1 and gentle though retir'd2 ,the joy of youth and health her eyes display'd1 ,and ease of heart her every look convey'd4 --,crabbe4 #a7 ,remind your sponsor 7or adviser7 of your meeting two or three days in advance of the time4 #b7 ,before acting on any plan1 be sure of the approval of your sponsor4 #c7 ,so treat your sponsor that she 7or he7 will delight to be with you4 ,,the ,,lavatory ,cleanliness is next to godliness4 --,wesley4 #a7 ,in school1 in a store1 in a club1 on trains1 in short1 wherever you use a public wash bowl1 leave it as clean as possible4 #b7 ,do not scatter toilet paper about4 ,keep the toilet rooms neat and clean and free from all writing on doors1 walls1 windows4 #c7 ,do not loiter or visit in toilet rooms4 ,,duty ,,to ,,your ,,chaperon ,though her mien carries much more invitation than command1 to behold her is an immediate check to loose behaviour2 to love her was a liberal education4 --,steele4 ,at school receptions1 sleigh-rides1 class meetings at private homes1 and so on1 there is always a chaperon1 who is giving her time for your enjoyment4 ,her kindness should be repaid by your courtesy4 #a7 ,as soon as possible after greeting your hostess1 greet your chaperon4 #b7 ,also1 just before leaving1 speak to her again cordially and gratefully4 #c7 ,see that your chaperon is not often left alone4 ,if the function is a dance1 invite her to dance2 or sit out a dance with her1 sometimes4 ,make her enjoy being your chaperon4 #d7 ,never tease to stay when the time comes to go4 #e7 ,don't hinder your chaperon by loitering over your wraps2 be ready when she is1 and leave the building with her4 ,,duty ,,to ,,your ,,hostess ,but evil is wrought by want of thought1 ,as well as want of heart4 --,hood4 #a7 ,before talking with others at a party greet your hostess2 then the older people present2 finally1 the young people4 #b7 ,as a guest you are not expected to say good-by to everybody2 but never leave without saying good-by to your hostess and expressing appreciation of her efforts to give you pleasure4 #c7 ,coperate with your hostess in trying to make everyone present happy4 ,if you fail to pay this courtesy to your hostess1 you stamp yourself as an undesirable guest4 #d7 ,if the function is a dance1 boys1 avoid too many consecutive dances with the same girl4 ,confining your attentions noticeably to the same girl makes her conspicuous and mars the general pleasure4 #e7 ,girls1 decline consecutive dances with the same boy4 ,do it graciously1 explaining that you would like to accept1 but must not be selfish4 ,if he is the right sort1 he will understand at once1 or come to his senses later4 ,if he is offended1 don't worry about it2 it is not worth while4 #f7 ,pay some kindly attention to the girls who do not dance all of the time4 ,they will feel grateful1 your hostess will feel grateful1 you will feel better satisfied than if you neglect them4 #g7 ,never refrain from dancing if any girl present is without a partner for that number4 ,to refrain is selfish in you1 and discourteous to both the girl and your hostess4 #h7 ,girls1 don't quit one of your friends to go and whisper with another4 ,such an action is sure to be considered unkind and inconsiderate4 #i7 ,train your eye to see how you may add to the enjoyment of all1 or of a single one1 and act promptly4 ,incidentally1 you thus add to your own enjoyment4 ,often think of ,tennyson's words3-- ,for manners are not idle1 but the fruit ,of loyal nature and of noble mind4 ,,duty ,,to ,,one ,,another ,if it is not seemly1 do it not2 if it is not true1 speak it not4 --,marcus ,aurelius4 #a7 ,after dancing with a girl thank her and walk back with her to her seat1 to her chaperon1 or to her next partner4 ,never leave her standing alone in the middle of the floor4 #b7 ,girls1 if your partner doesn't dance well1 take it pleasantly--but not as too much of a joke--and help him to do better4 #c7 ,avoid looking at a boy with your soul in your eyes4 ,a girl holds the key to the social situation4 ,she should keep such a situation at school on a cordial but wholly matter-of-fact basis1--absolutely free from sentimentality4 #d7 ,base your friendships on good comradeship1 not on maudlin emotion1 nor on propinquity4 ,the right kind of girl and boy friendships may give joy for a lifetime2 the wrong kind must be a continual menace4 #e7 ,don't be prudes1 girls1 but let every boy know that he must keep his hands off from you4 ,if he presumes1 a cool glance on your part will usually restrain him4 ,if it does not1 avoid him2 he is unworthy of your friendship4 #f7 ,boys1 you can easily tell what girls would have you sit very close to them1 and hold their hands1 and put your arms around them4 ,but1 be manly4 ,always protect a girl2 protect her from yourself1 even from herself4 ,if she does not wish to be so protected1 avoid her as you would the plague4 #g7 ,when you call on a girl1 you shouldn't remain after ten o'clock even though the girl wants you to4 ,girls1 you should not urge4 ,and1 girls1 observe how your boy friends fit themselves into the family group4 #h7 ,a gift you should acknowledge at once and cordially4 ,but1 boys1 let your gifts to girls be rare1 and restricted to candy1 books1 and flowers4 #i7 ,to force your presence upon those who seem not to want you1 tends to crystallize their feeling of antagonism4 ,on the other hand1 nothing more quickly disarms this feeling of antagonism than evidence of delicacy on your part4 #aj7 ,girls1 it is poor policy to call up boys often by telephone1 and bad manners to whistle to attract their attention4 #aa7 ,for you to sit at a social gathering with hat and coat on1 girls1--even though you must leave in a few moments1--is discourteous both to your hostess and to the other guests4 ,,duty ,,to ,,older ,,people ,the mildest manners1 and the gentlest heart4 --,pope4 #a7 ,show especial deference--not indifference--to your superiors in age1 office1 and the like4 ,do this not once1 but always4 ,watch for opportunities4 #b7 ,rise1 when an older person who is standing begins to talk to you4 #c7 ,if you wish to become a musician1 you seek help from the finest musical instructor within reach4 ,just so in the greater art of living effectively1 seek help from those who have learned wisdom4 ,as a rule1 your parents and your teachers are your best counsellors4 ,they have traveled the road before you1 and have your highest interests at heart4 ,listen to them4 ,don't make your life a wild experiment in blundering2 it doesn't pay4 #d7 ,never regard age1 even advanced age1 as a joke4 ,to do so blunts your own sensibilities4 ,,invitations ,that man may last1 but never lives1 ,who much receives1 but nothing gives4 --,gibbons4 #a7 ,if you receive a written invitation1 send a written reply4 ,let the reply accord with the invitation in being either formal1 or informal4 #b7 ,you will be thought discourteous if you fold your note carelessly1 write on soiled or ragged paper1 use pencil instead of ink1 or delay your reply4 #c7 ,accepting an invitation binds you1 in honor1 to carry out your engagement4 ,if circumstances prevent1 at once inform the one who invited you2 and do it in a considerate manner4 ,,introductions ,introduce a man to a woman1 a boy to a girl1 a younger person to an older1 thus3 ,mrs4 ,jones1 may ,i present 7or introduce7 my friend ,miss ,holbrook8 or1 ,miss ,brown1 my friend ,mr4 ,williams2 or1 ,father1 this is ,ethel ,reed4 ,let your manner and voice be dignified and gracious1 your words simple4 ,but avoid1--,mrs4 ,jones1 meet ,miss ,holbrook2 or1 ,mr4 ,brown1 shake hands with ,mr4 ,smith4 ,,dancing ,,requirements ,come and trip it as ye go ,on the light fantastic toe4 --,milton4 ,the ,national ,association of ,dancing ,masters is responsible for the following rules4 ,you may well think those dancers who disregard them either ignorant1 or awkward1 or vulgar4 #a7 ,face your partner at a distance of six or eight inches1 bodies parallel1 shoulders parallel4 #b7 ,if you are leading1 place your right hand between the shoulders of your partner1 keeping your right elbow well away from your body4 #c7 ,see that above1 but not resting on this arm1 is your partner's left arm1 at right angles with her body1 her hand just back of the curve of your shoulder4 #d7 ,let your left hand1 palm up1 clasp your partner's right4 ,a line from these hands to the opposite elbows should be parallel with your parallel bodies4 #e7 ,remember1--bobbing and wriggling are taboo4 ,let the spring come from the ankles and the knees4 ,imitate the grace of the swallow4 ,,refreshments ,,at ,,parties ,socrates said1 ,bad men live that they may eat and drink1 whereas good men eat and drink that they may live4 --,plutarch4 #a7 ,keep your refreshments simple and inexpensive4 ,after you are better acquainted1 omit them frequently4 #b7 ,boys1 you should be alert to help serve1 but use your judgment2 don't go off in a group to enjoy yourselves in the business of serving or eating4 #c7 ,avoid dropping crumbs on the floor or scattering them over the serving tables4 ,avoid placing anything hot or moist on a surface that may be disfigured by it4 #d7 ,pay special attention to any who seem shy or afraid to mingle with the other guests4 ,see that everybody has a good time4 #e7 ,help clean up at once1 boys1 what should be cleaned up1 and leave the room you use in perfect order4 ,don't walk off and let the girls do it all4 ,make yourselves useful until the work is finished4 ,,table ,,manners ,some hae meat and canna eat1 ,and some would eat that want it2 ,but we hae meat1 and we can eat1 ,sae let the ,lord be thankit4 --,burns4 #a7 ,do you know that table manners proclaim at once your social training8 #b7 ,boys1 at a dining table1 draw back the chair for the girl or the woman next to you1 push it under her as she sits down1 and then take your own seat4 #c7 ,girls and boys1 let your napkin lie open across your lap4 #d7 ,at home leave your napkin folded neatly1 or in its ring1 if there is a ring4 ,but1 let it lie loose beside your plate when you are at a hotel2 partly folded1 when you are a guest in a private home4 #e7 ,never use a toothpick at the table or in the presence of others4 ,if it seems absolutely necessary to use one at the table1 cover your lips with your napkin2 elsewhere1 with your handkerchief4 #f7 ,hold your knife in your right hand1 not as though it were a penholder1 but so that you may easily press down on the back of the knife with your right forefinger4 #g7 ,in a similar position1 when cutting food1 hold your fork tines down with your left hand4 ,but1 in carrying food to your mouth1 have the tines curve up1 not down1 and take your fork in your right hand between your thumb and forefinger1 so that it rests comfortably near the tip of the second finger4 #h7 ,never should your table knife be used for conveying food to your mouth4 #i7 ,you find your small bread and butter plate and butter spreader at your left4 ,never spread at once an entire slice of bread2 break off a half or a quarter and spread it on your bread and butter plate1--not on the palm of your hand4 #aj7 ,when your plate is passed for a second helping1 let your knife and fork remain on it1 side by side2 also1 when you have finished4 ,never rest your knife or fork partly on the table and partly on your plate or your napkin ring4 ,avoid mixing your food on your plate4 #aa7 ,use a fork when eating vegetables and salad1--and ice-cream1 if an ice-cream fork is provided4 #ab7 ,if cutting the lettuce leaves of your salad is necessary1 cut with your fork4 #ac7 ,make the least possible noise in chewing1 and none at all in taking food from a spoon4 ,sometimes1 in eating crisp toast1 for example1 it is very difficult to avoid a crunching sound1 but eat slowly1 taking very small mouthfuls1 and you can avoid noise4 #ad7 ,don't drink from a cup while it holds a spoon4 ,when not using your teaspoon1 let it lie on the saucer4 ,do not drink from your saucer4 ,stir quietly1 and lay your spoon in your saucer at once4 #ae7 ,at the table1 keep your hands in your lap when you are not eating2 toying with articles on the table is bad form4 #af7 ,between courses1 avoid lounging back in your chair2 keep your spine straight1 your body poised a little forward1 and your mind occupied with the conversation which you are helping to make pleasant4 #ag7 ,eat a little less of everything than you might4 ,shrink from the slightest appearance of greediness4 #ah7 ,use knives1 forks1 and spoons in the order you find them4 ,when in doubt1 observe your hostess4 #ai7 ,after dipping the tips of your fingers into your finger bowl1 dry them lightly on your napkin4 #bj7 ,when the hostess rises1 boys1 rise and draw back the chair of the girl or the woman next you as she rises1 and let her precede you from the room4 ,,duty ,,to ,,yourself ,this above all3 to thine own self be true1 ,and it must follow1 as the night the day1 ,thou canst not then be false to any man4 --,shakespeare4 #a7 ,take a complete bath at least three times a week2 better still1 every day4 #b7 ,keep your hair1 teeth1 finger nails1 and clothes in good condition4 ,look well groomed4 #c7 ,if you eat1 sleep1 and exercise properly1 your health and your complexion will be at their best4 ,consult your gymnasium teacher on the subject1 or consult a reliable book4 #d7 ,girls1 when you dress your hair too startlingly1 wear waists that are too low or too thin1 use powder and rouge1 you remind boys and men of the wrong kind of woman4 ,the best time for cosmetics1 if you must use them1 is not during your school days4 #e7 ,of course dress as becomingly as you can2 but1 in the main1 rely for your attractiveness on your attainments1 your gentle manners1 your tact1 and your active desire to render others comfortable and happy4 #f7 ,cultivate charm1 girls and boys4 ,the best teacher of ,how to be charming1 is a really kind heart4 ,every one of you can have that4 #g7 ,if your heart is kind1 you will learn to talk interestingly1 and to listen intelligently4 #h7 ,try1 increasingly1 to fit your word to your thought1 and your thought to the fact4 ,being accurate does not mean being dull4 ,effective speech has much need for imagination1 but very little for common slang4 ,you understand and enjoy1-- ,these growing feathers plucked from ,caesar's wing ,will make him fly an ordinary pitch4 ,if1 however1 in slang phrase1 a person spoke of swiping ,caesar's dope2 or of making ,caesar come off his perch1 you would see that something fine in the thought had vanished4 ,practise expressing your ideas as attractively as possible4 #i7 ,don't make cutting remarks about those who are absent2 your wit may win a laugh1 but its unkindness will cause others to like you the less4 ,they will feel uncomfortable about what you may say of them in their absence4 #aj7 ,whenever you are curious about the wonderful experience which we call birth1 think of it reverently1 and go at once for information to your father or mother2 if you lack these1 to some high-minded friend much older than you4 ,otherwise1 inclose a stamped envelope addressed to yourself in a letter to the ,y4,m4,c4,a4 or the ,y4,w4,c4,a4 or the ,federal ,bureau of ,information1 ,washington1 ,d4,c41 asking the title of the best book for a boy or a girl of your age1 about the ,beginnings of ,life4 #aa7 ,never listen to explanations from the ignorant or the vulgar4 ,impure thoughts on this subject lead to the ruin of both body and spirit4 ,pure thoughts lead to the most precious possessions the world can give3 father1 mother1 sister1 brother1 friend1 husband1 wife1 children1 home1 country4 #ab7 ,be dependable4 ,if any quality is most desirable1 it is that of dependableness4 ,in school you have wonderful opportunities for cultivating it4 #ac7 ,every one of you should aim to become economically independent4 ,to that end1 decide on a vocation and plan your studies accordingly4 ,if you wish to change later1 very well2 but always work towards a definite goal4 #ad7 ,avoid showing your displeasure with an acquaintance by not bowing4 ,to do so is crude4 ,a formal bow should be bestowed even on an enemy4 ,cut an acquaintance only when you have reason to believe him an utterly unfit companion4 #ae7 ,make up at once with a friend4 ,i'm sorry1 helps4 ,but in case this fails1 find a way that succeeds4 ,don't lose your friend4 #af7 ,be courteous1 frank1 and friendly4 ,don't try to be popular by attracting attention4 ,popularity which has to be sought is of short duration4 ,,home ,such is the patriot's boast1 where'er we roam1-- ,his first1 best country ever is at home4 --,goldsmith4 #a7 ,the finer you are1 the more certain you will be to practice in your own home every courtesy which you know is due elsewhere4 ,if you are not polite and considerate in your home1 you cannot help showing that fact away from home4 #b7 ,the spirit that aims at giving pleasure rather than annoyance or pain will not wish to take any vacation4 ,at first1 the courteous thought and act may require conscious effort4 ,persistent practice1 however1 crystallizes this conscious effort into confirmed habit2 the result is1 a lady1 a gentleman4