,,the ,,ethics ,,of ,,drink ,,and ,,other ,,social ,,questions ,,or ,,joints ,,in ,,our ,,social ,,armour ,,by ,,james ,,runciman ,author of ,a ,dream of the ,north ,sea1 ,skippers and ,shellbacks1 ,etc ,london ,,hodder ,,and ,,stoughton #bg1 ,,paternoster ,,row ,,mdcccxcii #ahib ,,the ,,ethics ,,of ,,the ,,drink ,,question4 ,all the statistics and formal statements published about drink are no doubt impressive enough to those who have the eye for that kind of thing2 but1 to most of us1 the word million means nothing at all1 and thus when we look at figures1 and find that a terrific number of gallons are swallowed1 and that an equally terrific amount in millions sterling is spent1 we feel no emotion4 ,it is as though you told us that a thousand ,chinamen were killed yesterday2 for we should think more about the ailments of a pet terrier than about the death of the ,chinese1 and we think absolutely nothing definite concerning the millions which appear with such an imposing intention when reformers want to stir the public4 ,no man's imagination was ever vitally impressed by figures1 and ,i am a little afraid that the statistical gentlemen repel people instead of attracting them4 ,the persons who screech and abuse the drink sellers are even less effective than the men of figures2 their opponents laugh at them1 and their friends grow deaf and apathetic in the storm of whirling words1 while cool outsiders think that we should be better employed if we found fault with ourselves and sat in sackcloth and ashes instead of gnashing teeth at tradesmen who obey a human instinct4 ,the publican is considered1 among platform folk in the temperance body1 as even worse than a criminal1 if we take all things seriously that they choose to say1 and ,i have over and over again heard vague blather about confiscating the drink-sellers' property and reducing them to the state to which they have brought others4 ,then there is the rant regarding brewers4 ,why forget essential business only in order to attack a class of plutocrats whom we have made1 and whom our society worships with odious grovellings8 ,the brewers and distillers earn their money by concocting poisons which cause nearly all the crime and misery in broad ,britain2 there is not a soul living in these islands who does not know the effect of the afore-named poisons2 there is not a soul living who does not very well know that there never was a pestilence crawling over the earth which could match the alcoholic poisons in murderous power4 ,there is a demand for these poisons2 the brewer and distiller supply the demand and gain thereby large profits2 society beholds the profits and adores the brewer4 ,when a gentleman has sold enough alcoholic poison to give him the vast regulation fortune which is the drink-maker's inevitable portion1 then the world receives him with welcome and reverence2 the rulers of the nation search out honours and meekly bestow them upon him1 for can he not command seats1 and do not seats mean power1 and does not power enable talkative gentry to feed themselves fat out of the parliamentary trough8 ,no wonder the brewer is a personage4 ,honours which used to be reserved for men who did brave deeds1 or thought brave thoughts1 are reserved for persons who have done nothing but sell so many buckets of alcoholized fluid4 ,observe what happens when some brewer's wife chooses to spend #ejjj on a ball4 ,i remember one excellent lady carefully boasting 7for the benefit of the ,press7 that the flowers alone that were in her house on one evening cost in all #bjjj4 ,well1 the mob of society folk fairly yearn for invitations to such a show1 and there is no meanness too despicable to be perpetrated by women who desire admission4 ,so through life the drink-maker and his family fare in dignity and splendour2 adulation surrounds them2 powerful men bow to the superior force of money2 wealth accumulates until the amount in the brewer's possession baffles the mind that tries to conceive it--and the big majority of our interesting race say that all this is good4 ,considering1 then1 how the ,english people directly and indirectly force the man of drink onward until he must of necessity fancy there is something of the moral demi-god about him2 considering how he is wildly implored to aid in ruling us from ,westminster2 considering that his aid at an election may procure him the same honour which fell to the share of ,william ,pitt1 ,earl of ,chatham--may we not say that the community makes the brewer1 and that if the brewer's stuff mars the community we have no business to howl at him4 ,we are answerable for his living1 and moving1 and having his being--the few impulsive people who gird at him should rather turn in shame and try to make some impression on the huge1 cringing1 slavering crowd who make the plutocrat's pompous reign possible4 ,but for myself1 ,i cannot be bothered with bare figures and vague abuse nowadays2 abstractions are nothing1 and neat arguments are less than nothing1 because the dullest quack that ever quacked can always clench an argument in a fashion4 ,every turn that talk can take on the drink question brings the image of some man or woman1 or company of men and women1 before me1 and that image is alive to my mind4 ,if you pelt me with tabular forms1 and tell me that each adult in ,britain drank so many pints last year1 you might just as well recite a mathematical proof4 ,i fix on some one human figure that your words may suggest and the image of the bright lad whom ,i saw become a dirty1 loafing1 thievish sot is more instructive and more woeful than all your columns of numerals4 ,before me passes a tremendous procession of the lost3 ,i can stop its march when ,i choose and fix on any given individual in the ranks1 so that you can hardly name a single fact concerning drink1 which does not recall to me a fellow-creature who has passed into the place of wrecked lives and slain souls4 ,the more ,i think about it the more plainly ,i see that1 if we are to make any useful fight against drink1 we must drop the preachee-preachee2 we must drop loud execrations of the people whose existence the ,state fosters2 we must get hold of men who know what drinking means1 and let them come heart to heart with the victims who are blindly tramping on to ruin for want of a guide and friend4 ,my hideous procession of the damned is always there to importune me2 ,i gathered the dolorous recruits who form the procession when ,i was dwelling in strange1 darkened ways1 and ,i know that only the magnetism of the human soul could ever have saved one of them4 ,if anybody fancies that ,gothenburg systems1 or lectures1 or little tiresome tracts1 or sloppy yarns about ,joe ,tomkins's ,temperance ,turkey1 or effusive harangues by half-educated buffoons1 will ever do any good1 he must run along the ranks of my procession with me1 and ,i reckon he may learn something4 ,the comic personages who deal with the subject are cruelly useless2 the very notion of making jokes in presence of such a mighty living ,terror seems desolating to the mind2 ,i could not joke over the pest of drink1 for ,i had as lief dance a hornpipe to the blare of the last ,trumpet4 ,i said you must have men who know1 if you care to rescue any tempted creature4 ,you must also have men who address the individual and get fast hold of his imagination2 abstractions must be completely left alone1 and your workers must know so much of the minute details of the horror against which they are fighting that each one who comes under their influence shall feel as if the story of his life were known and his soul laid bare4 ,i do not believe that you will ever stop one man from drinking by means of legislation2 you may level every tavern over twenty square miles1 but you will not thereby prevent a fellow who has the bite of drink from boozing himself mad whenever he likes4 ,as for stopping a woman by such merely mechanical means as the closing of public-houses1 the idea is ridiculous to anybody who knows the foxy cunning1 the fixed determination of a female soaker4 ,it is a great moral and physical problem that we want to solve1 and ,bills and clauses are only so much ink and paper which are ineffective as a schoolboy's copybook4 ,if a man has the desire for alcohol there is no power known that can stop him from gratifying himself2 the end to be aimed at is to remove the desire--to get the drinker past that stage when the craving presses hardly on him1 and you can never bring that about by rules and regulations4 ,i grant that the clusters of drink-shops which are stuck together in the slums of our big towns are a disgrace to all of us1 but if we closed #ii per cent4 of them by ,statute we should have the same drunken crew left4 ,while wandering far and wide over ,england1 nothing has struck me more than the steady resolution with which men will obtain drink during prohibited hours2 the cleverest administrator in the world could not frame a network of clauses that could stop them2 one might close every drink-selling place in ,britain1 and yet those folks that had a mind would get drink when they wanted it4 ,you may ply bolts and bars2 you may stop the working of beer-engines and taps2 but all will be futile1 for ,i repeat1 that only by asserting power over hearts1 souls1 imaginations1 can you make any sort of definite resistance to the awe-striking plague that envenoms the world4 ,with every humility ,i am obliged to say that many of the good people who aim at reform do not know sufficiently well the central facts regarding drink and drinkers4 ,it is beautiful to watch some placid man who stands up and talks gently to a gathering of sympathizers4 ,the reposeful face1 the reposeful voice1 the refinement1 the assured faith of the speaker are comforting2 but when he explains that he has always been an abstainer1 ,i am inclined to wonder how he can possibly exchange ideas with an alcoholized man4 ,how can he know where to aim his persuasions with most effect8 ,can he really sympathize with the fallen8 ,he has never lived with drunkards or wastrels2 he is apart1 like a star1 and ,i half think that he only has a blurred vision of the things about which he talks so sweetly4 ,he would be more poignant1 and more likely to draw people after him1 if he had living images burned into his consciousness4 ,my own set of pictures all stand out with ghastly plainness as if they were lit up by streaks of fire from the ,pit4 ,i have come through the ,valley of the ,shadow into which ,i ventured with a light heart1 and those who know me might point and say what was said of a giant3 ,there is the man who has been in hell4 ,it was true4 ,through the dim and sordid inferno1 ,i moved as in a trance for awhile1 and that is what makes me so keen to warn those who fancy they are safe2 that is what makes me so discontented with the peculiar ethical conceptions of a society which bows down before the concocter of drink and spurns the lost one whom drink seizes4 ,i have learned to look with yearning pity and pardon on all who have been blasted in life by their own weakness1 and gripped by the trap into which so many weakly creatures stumble4 ,looking at brutal life1 catching the rotting soul in the very fact1 have made me feel the most careless contempt for ,statute-mongers1 because ,i know now that you must conquer the evil of evils by a straight appeal to one individual after another and not by any screed of throttling jargon4 ,one ,father ,mathew would be worth ten ,parliaments1 even if the ,parliaments were all reeling off curative measures with unexampled velocity4 ,you must not talk to a county or a province and expect to be heard to any purpose2 you must address ,john1 and ,tom1 and ,mary4 ,i am sure that dead-lift individual effort will eventually reduce the ills arising from alcohol to a minimum1 and ,i am equally sure that the blind groping of half-informed men who chatter at ,st4 ,stephen's will never do more good than the chatter of the same number of jackdaws4 ,it is impossible to help admiring ,sir ,wilfrid ,lawson's smiling courage1 but ,i really do not believe that he sees more than the faint shadows of the evils against which he struggles2 he does not know the true nature of the task which he has attacked1 and he fancies that securing temperance is an affair of bolts1 and bars1 and police1 and cackling local councils4 ,i wish he had lived with me for a year4 ,if you talk with strong emotion about the dark horror of drink you always earn plenty of jibes1 and it is true that you do give your hand away1 as the fighting men say4 ,it is easy to turn off a light paragraph like this3 ,because ,a chooses to make a beast of himself1 is that any reason why ,b1 and ,c1 and ,d should be deprived of a wholesome article of liquid food8--and so on4 ,now1 ,i do not want to trouble ,b1 and ,c1 and ,d at all2 ,a is my man1 and ,i want to get at him1 not by means of a policeman1 or a municipal officer of any kind1 but by bringing my soul and sympathy close to him4 ,moreover1 ,i believe that if everybody had definite knowledge of the wide ruin which is being wrought by drink there would be a general movement which would end in the gradual disappearance of drinking habits4 ,at this present1 however1 our state is truly awful1 and ,i see a bad end to it all1 and a very bad end to ,england herself1 unless a great emotional impulse travels over the country4 ,the same middle class which is envenomed by the gambling madness is also the heir of all the more vile habits which the aristocrats have abandoned4 ,drinking--conviviality ,i think they call it--is not merely an excrescence on the life of the middle class--it is the life2 and work1 thought1 study1 seemly conduct1 are now the excrescences4 ,drink first1 gambling second1 lubricity third--those are the chief interests of the young men1 and ,i cannot say that the interests of mature and elderly men differ very much from those of the fledglings4 ,ladies and gentlemen who dwell in quiet refinement can hardly know the scenes amid which our middle-class lad passes the span of his most impressionable days4 ,i have watched the men at all times and in all kinds of places2 every town of importance is very well known to me1 and the same abomination is steadily destroying the higher life in all4 ,the ,chancellors of the ,exchequer gaily repeat the significant figures which give the revenue from alcohol2 the optimist says that times are mending2 the comfortable gentry who mount the pulpits do not generally care to ruffle the fine dames by talking about unpleasant things--and all the while the curse is gaining1 and the betting1 scoffing1 degraded crew of drinkers are sliding merrily to destruction4 ,some are able to keep on the slide longer than others1 but ,i have seen scores--hundreds--stop miserably1 and the very faces of the condemned men1 with the last embruted look on them1 are before me4 ,my subject has so many thousands of facets that ,i am compelled to select a few of the most striking4 ,take one scene through which ,i sat not very long ago1 and then you may understand how far the coming regenerator will have to go4 ,a great room was filled by about #cej men and lads1 all of the middle class2 a concert was going on1 and ,i was a little curious to know the kind of entertainment which the well-dressed company liked4 ,of course there was drink in plenty1 and the staff of waiters had a busy time2 a loud crash of talk went on between the songs1 and1 as the drink gathered power on excited brains1 this crash grew more and more discordant4 ,nice lads1 with smooth1 pleasant faces1 grew flushed and excited1 and ,i am afraid that ,i occupied myself in marking out possible careers for a good many of them as ,i studied their faces4 ,there was not much fun of the healthy kind2 fat1 comfortable1 middle-aged men laughed so heartily at the faintest indecent allusion that the singers grew broader and broader1 and the hateful music-hall songs grew more and more risky as the night grew onward4 ,by the way1 can anything be more loathsomely idiotic than the average music-hall ditty1 with its refrain and its quaint stringing together of casual filthiness8 ,if ,i had not wanted to fix a new picture on my mind ,i should have liked better to be in a tap-room among honestly brutal costers and scavengers than with that sniggering1 winking gang4 ,the drink got hold1 glasses began to be broken here and there1 the time was beaten with glass crushers1 spoons1 pipes1 and walking-sticks2 and then the bolder spirits felt that the time for good1 rank1 unblushing blackguardism had come4 ,a being stepped up and faced a roaring audience of enthusiasts who knew the quality of his dirtiness2 he launched out into an unclean stave1 and he reduced his admirers to mere convulsions4 ,he was encored1 and he went a trifle further1 until he reached a depth of bestiality below which a gaff in ,shoreditch could net descend4 ,ah6 ,those bonny lads1 how they roared with laughter1 and how they exchanged winks with grinning elders6 ,not a single obscure allusion to filth was lost upon them1 and they took more and more drink under pressure of the secret excitement until many of them were unsteady and incoherent4 ,i think ,i should shoot a boy of mine if ,i found him enjoying such a foul entertainment4 ,it was lze-,humanity4 ,the orgie rattled on1 to the joy of all the steaming1 soddened company1 and ,i am not able to guess where some of the songs and recitations came from4 ,there are deeps below deeps1 and ,i suppose that there are skilled literary workmen who have sunk so far that they are ready to supply the unspeakable dirt which ,i heard4 ,there was a merry crowd at the bar when this astounding function ceased1 and the lively lads jostled1 and laughed1 and quoted some of the more spicy specimens of nastiness which they had just heard4 ,now1 ,i should not have mentioned such an unsavoury business as this1 but that it illustrates in a curious way the fact that one is met and countered by the power of ,drink at every turn in this country4 ,among that unholy audience were one or two worthies who ought by rights to have called the police1 and forced the promoters of the fun to appear before the ,bench in the morning4 ,but then these magistrates had an interest in ,beer1 and ,brewery shares were pretty well represented in the odious room1 and thus a flagrant scandal was gently passed aside4 ,the worst of it is that1 after a rouse like this1 the young men do not care to go to bed1 so they adjourn to some one's rooms and play cards till any hour4 ,in the train next morning there are blotchy faces1 dull eyes1 tongues with a bitter taste1 and there is a general rush for liveners before the men go to office or warehouse2 and the day drags on until the joyous evening comes1 when some new form of debauch drowns the memory of the morning's headache4 ,should you listen to a set of these men when the roar of a long bar is at its height at night1 you will find that the life of the intellect has passed away from their midst4 ,the fellows may be sharp in a small way at business1 and ,i am sure ,i hope they are2 but their conversation is painful in the extreme to any one who wishes to retain a shred of respect for his own species4 ,if you listen long1 and then fix your mind so that you can pick out the exact significance of what you have heard1 you become confounded4 ,take the scraps of bar gabble4 ,so ,i says1 ',lay me fours4' ,and he winks and says1 ',i'll give you seven to two1 if you like4' ,well1 you know1 the horse won1 and ,i stood him a bottle out of the three pound ten1 so ,i wasn't much in4 ',what6' says ,i2 'step outside along o' me1 and bring your pal with you1 and ,i'll spread your bloomin' nose over your face4' ,that corked him4 ,i tell you ,flyaway's a dead cert4 ,i know a bloke that goes to ,newmarket regular1 and he's acquainted with ,reilly of the ,greyhound1 and ,reilly told him that he heard ,teddy ,martin's cousin say that ,flyaway was tried within seven pounds of ,peacock4 ,can you have a better tip than that8 ,i'll give you the break1 and we'll play for a bob and the games4 ,thanks1 deah boy1 ,i'll jest have one with you4 ,lor6 wasn't ,i chippy this morning8 ,i felt as if the pavement was making rushes at me1 and my hat seemed to want a shoehorn to get it on or off for that matter4 ,bill's whisky's too good4 ,i'm going out with a ,judy on ,sunday1 or else you'd have me with you4 ,the girls won't leave me alone1 and the blessed dears can't be denied4 ,so the talk goes steadily forward4 ,what can a bright lad learn there8 ,many of the assembly are very young1 and their features have not lost the freshness and purity of skin which give such a charm to a healthy lad's appearance4 ,would any mother like to see her favourite among that hateful crowd8 ,i do not think that mothers rightly know the sort of places which their darlings enter2 ,i do not think they guess the kind of language which the youths hear when the chimes sound at midnight2 they do not know the intricacies of a society which half encourages callow beings to drink1 and then kicks them into the gutter if the drink takes hold effectually4 ,the kindly1 seemly woman remains at home in her drawing-room1 papa slumbers if he is one of the stay-at-home sort2 but ,gerald1 and ,sidney1 and ,alfred are out in the drink-shop hearing talk fit to make ,rabelais turn queasy1 or they are in the billiard-room learning to spell ruin with all convenient speed1 or perhaps they have copped it--that is the correct phrase--rather early1 and they are swaggering along1 shadowed by some creature--half girl1 half tiger-cat--who will bring them up in good time4 ,if the women knew enough1 ,i sometimes think they would make a combined1 nightly raid on the boozing-bars1 and bring their lads out4 ,some hard-headed fellows may think that there is something grandmotherly in the regrets which ,i utter over the cesspool in which so many of our middle-class seem able to wallow without suffering asphyxia2 but ,i am only mournful because ,i have seen the plight of so many and many after their dip in the sinister depths of the pool4 ,i envy those stolid people who can talk so contemptuously of frailty--,i mean ,i envy them their self-mastery2 ,i quite understand the temperament of those who can be content with a slight exhilaration1 and who fiercely contemn the crackbrain who does not know when to stop4 ,no doubt it is a sad thing for a man to part with his self-control1 but ,i happen to hold a brief for the crackbrain1 and ,i say that there is not any man living who can afford to be too contemptuous1 for no one knows when his turn may come to make a disastrous slip4 ,most strange it is that a vice which brings instant punishment on him who harbours it should be first of all encouraged by the very people who are most merciless in condemning it4 ,the drunkard has not to wait long for his punishment2 it follows hard on his sin1 and he is not left to the justice of another world4 ,and yet1 as we have said1 this vice1 which entails such scathing disgrace and suffering1 is encouraged in many seductive ways4 ,the talk in good company often runs on wine2 the man who has the deadly taint in his blood is delicately pressed to take that which brings the taint once more into ill-omened activity2 but1 so long as his tissues show no sign of that flabbiness and general unwholesomeness which mark the excessive drinker1 he is left unnoticed4 ,then the literary men nearly always make the subject of drink attractive in one way or other4 ,we laugh at ,mr4 ,pickwick and all his gay set of brandy-bibbers2 we laugh at ,john ,ridd1 with his few odd gallons of ale per day2 but let any man be seen often in the condition which led to ,mr4 ,pickwick's little accident1 and see what becomes of him4 ,he is soon shunned like a scabbed sheep4 ,one had better incur penal servitude than fall into that vice from which the ,government derives a huge revenue--the vice which is ironically associated with friendliness1 good temper1 merriment1 and all goodly things4 ,there are times when one is minded to laugh for very bitterness4 ,and this sin1 which begins in kindness and ends always in utter selfishness--this sin1 which pours accursed money into the ,exchequer--this sin1 which consigns him who is guilty of it to a doom worse than servitude or death--this sin is to be fought by ,act of ,parliament6 ,on the one hand1 there are gentry who say1 ,drink is a dreadful curse1 but look at the revenue4 ,on the other hand1 there are those who say1 ,drink is a dreadful thing2 let us stamp it out by means of foolscap and printers' ink4 ,then the neutrals say1 ,bother both your parties4 ,drink is a capital thing in its place4 ,why don't you leave it alone8 ,meantime the flower of the earth are being bitterly blighted4 ,it is the special examples that ,i like to bring out1 so that the jolly lads who are tempted into such places as the concert-room which ,i described may perhaps receive a timely check4 ,it is no use talking to me about culture1 and refinement1 and learning1 and serious pursuits saving a man from the devouring fiend2 for it happens that the fiend nearly always clutches the best and brightest and most promising4 ,intellect alone is not worth anything as a defensive means against alcohol1 and ,i can convince anybody of that if he will go with me to a common lodging-house which we can choose at random4 ,yes1 it is the bright and powerful intellects that catch the rot first in too many cases1 and that is why ,i smile at the notion of mere book-learning making us any better4 ,if ,i were to make out a list of the scholars whom ,i have met starving and in rags1 ,i should make people gape4 ,i once shared a pot of fourpenny ale with a man who used to earn #bjjj a year by coaching at ,oxford4 ,he was in a low house near the ,waterloo ,road1 and he died of cold and hunger there4 ,he had been the friend and counsellor of statesmen1 but the vice from which statesmen squeeze revenue had him by the throat before he knew where he was1 and he drifted toward death in a kind of constant dream from which no one ever saw him wake4 ,these once bright and splendid intellectual beings swarm in the houses of poverty3 if you pick up with a peculiarly degraded one you may always be sure that he was one of the best men of his time1 and it seems as if the very rich quality of his intelligence had enabled corruption to rankle through him so much the more quickly4 ,i have seen a tramp on the road--a queer1 long-nosed1 short-sighted animal--who would read ,greek with the book upside-down4 ,he was a very fine ,latin scholar1 and we tried him with ,virgil2 he could go off at score when he had a single line given him1 and he scarcely made a slip1 for the poetry seemed ingrained4 ,i have shared a pennyworth of sausage with the brother of a ,chief ,justice1 and ,i have played a piccolo while an ex-incumbent performed a dance which he described1 ,i think1 as ,pyrrhic4 ,he fell in the fire and used hideous language in ,latin and ,french1 but ,i do not know whether that was ,pyrrhic also4 ,drink is the dainty harvester2 no puny ears for him1 no faint and bending stalks3 he reaps the rathe corn1 and there is only the choicest of the choice in his sheaves4 ,that is what ,i want to fix on the minds of young people--and others2 the more sense of power you have1 the more pride of strength you have1 the more you are likely to be marked and shorn down by the grim reaper2 and there is little hope for you when the reaper once approaches1 because the very friends who followed the national craze1 and upheld the harmlessness of drink1 will shoot out their lips at you and run away when your bad moment comes4 ,the last person who ever suspects that a wife drinks is always the husband2 the last person who ever suspects that any given man is bitten with drink is that man himself4 ,so stealthily1 so softly does the evil wind itself around a man's being1 that he very often goes on fancying himself a rather admirable and temperate customer--until the crash comes4 ,it is all so easy1 that the deluded dupe never thinks that anything is far wrong until he finds that his friends are somehow beginning to fight shy of him4 ,no one will tell him what ails him1 and ,i may say that such a course would be quite useless1 for the person warned would surely fly into a passion1 declare himself insulted1 and probably perform some mad trick while his nerves were on edge4 ,well1 there comes a time when the doomed man is disinclined for exertion1 and he knows that something is wrong4 ,he has become sly almost without knowing it1 and1 although he is pining for some stimulus1 he pretends to go without1 and tries by the flimsiest of devices1 to deceive those around him4 ,now that is a funny symptom2 the master vice1 the vice that is the pillar of the revenue1 always1 without any exception known to me1 turns a man into a sneak1 and it generally turns him into a liar as well4 ,so sure as the habit of concealment sets in1 so surely we may be certain that the dry-rot of the soul has begun4 ,the drinker is tremulous2 he finds that light beverages are useless to him1 and he tries something that burns3 his nerve recovers tone2 he laughs at himself for his early morning fears1 and he gets over another day4 ,but the dry-rot is spreading2 body and soul react on each other1 and the forlorn one soon begins to be fatally false and weak in morals1 and dirty and slovenly in person4 ,then in the dead1 unhappy nights he suffers all the torments that can be endured if he wakes up while his day's supply of alcohol lies stagnant in his system4 ,no imagination is so retrospective as the drunkard's1 and the drunkard's remorse is the most terrible torture known4 ,the wind cries in the dark and the trees moan2 the agonized man who lies waiting the morning thinks of the times when the whistle of the wind was the gladdest of sounds to him2 his old ambitions wake from their trance and come to gaze on him reproachfully2 he sees that fortune 7and mayhap fame7 have passed him by1 and all through his own fault2 he may whine about imaginary wrongs during the day when he is maudlin1 but the night fairly throttles him if he attempts to turn away from the stark truth1 and he remains pinned face to face with his beautiful1 dead self4 ,then1 with a start1 he remembers that he has no friends4 ,when he crawls out in the morning to steady his hand he will be greeted with filthy public-house cordiality by the animals to whose level he has dragged himself1 but of friends he has none4 ,now1 is it not marvellous8 ,drink is so jolly2 prosperous persons talk with such a droll wink about vagaries which they or their friends committed the night before2 it is all so very1 very lightsome6 ,the brewers and distillers who put the mirth-inspiring beverages into the market receive more consideration1 and a great deal more money1 than an average ,european prince2--and yet the poor dry-rotted unfortunate whose decadence we are tracing is like a leper in the scattering effects which he produces during his shaky promenade4 ,he is indeed alone in the world1 and brandy or gin is his only counsellor and comforter4 ,as to character1 the last rag of that goes when the first sign of indolence is seen2 the watchers have eyes like cats1 and the self-restrained men among them have usually seen so many fellows depart to perdition that every stage in the process of degradation is known to them4 ,no6 there is not a friend1 and dry1 clever gentlemen say1 ,yes4 ,good chap enough once on a day1 but can't afford to be seen with him now4 ,the soaker is amazed to find that women are afraid of him a little1 and shrink from him--in fact1 the only people who are cordial with him are the landlords1 among whom he is treated as a sort of irresponsible baby4 ,i may as well have his money as anybody else4 ,he shan't get outrageously drunk here1 but he may as well moisten his clay and keep himself from being miserable4 ,if he gets the jumps in the night that's his look-out4 ,that is the soaker's friend4 ,the man is not unkind2 he is merely hardened1 and his morals1 like those of nearly all who are connected with the great ,trade1 have suffered a twist4 ,when the soaker's last penny has gone1 he will receive from the landlord many a contemptuously good-natured gift--pity it is that the lost wastrel cannot be saved before that weariful last penny huddles in the corner of his pocket4 ,while the harrowing descent goes on our suffering wretch is gradually changing in appearance3 the piggish element that is latent in most of us comes out in him2 his morality is sapped2 he will beg1 borrow1 lie1 and steal2 and1 worst of all1 he is a butt for thoughtless young fellows4 ,the last is the worst cut of all1 for the battered1 bloodless1 sunken ne'er-do-well can remember only too vividly his own gallant youth1 and the thought of what he was drives him crazed4 ,there is only one end2 if the doomed one escapes delirium tremens he is likely to have cirrhosis1 and if he misses both of these1 then dropsy or ,bright's disease claims him4 ,those who once loved him pray for his death1 and greet his last breath with an echoing sigh of thankfulness and relief3 he might have been cheered in his last hour by the graceful sympathy of troops of friends2 but the ,state-protected vice has such a withering effect that it scorches up friendship as a fiery breath from a furnace might scorch a grass blade4 ,if one of my joyous1 delightful lads could just watch the shambling1 dirty figure of such a failure as ,i have described2 if he could see the sneers of amused passers-by1 the timid glances of women1 the contemptuous off-hand speech of the children--,oh6 him6 ,that's old1 boozy ,blank2 then the youths might well tremble1 for the woebegone beggar that snivels out thanks for a mouthful of gin was once a brave lad--clever1 handsome1 generous1 the delight of friends1 the joy of his parents1 the most brilliantly promising of all his circle4 ,he began by being jolly2 he was well encouraged and abetted2 he found that respectable men drank1 and that ,society made no demur4 ,but he forgot that there are drinkers and drinkers1 he forgot that the cool-headed men were not tainted by heredity1 nor were their brains so delicately poised that the least grain of foreign matter introduced in the form of vapour could cause semi-insanity4 ,and thus the sacrifice of ,society--and the ,exchequer--goes to the tomb amid contempt1 and hissing1 and scorn2 while the saddest thing of all is that those who loved him most passionately are most glad to hear the clods thump on his coffin4 ,i believe1 if you let me keep a youngster for an hour in a room with me1 ,i could tell him enough stories from my own shuddery experience to frighten him off drink for life4 ,i should cause him to be haunted4 ,there is none of the rage of the convert in all this2 ,i knew what ,i was doing when ,i went into the base and sordid homes of ruin during years1 and ,i want to know how any justification not fitted for the libretto of an extravaganza can be given by certain parliamentary gentlemen in order that we may be satisfied with their conduct4 ,my wanderings and freaks do not count2 ,i was a ,bohemian1 with the tastes of a ,romany and the curiosity of a philosopher2 ,i went into the most abominable company because it amused me and ,i had only myself to please1 and ,i saw what a fearfully tense grip the monster1 ,drink1 has taken of this nation2 and let me say that you cannot understand that one little bit1 if you are content to knock about with a policeman and squint at signboards4 ,well1 ,i want to know how these legislators can go to church and repeat certain prayers1 while they continue to make profit by retailing ,death at so much a gallon2 and ,i want to know how some scores of other godly men go out of their way to back up a traffic which is very well able to take care of itself4 ,a wild1 night-roaming gipsy like me is not expected to be a model1 but one might certainly expect better things from folks who are so insultingly1 aggressively righteous4 ,one sombre and thoughtful ,romany of my acquaintance said1 ,my brother1 there are many things that ,i try to fight1 and they knock me out of time in the first round4 ,that is my own case exactly when ,i observe comfortable personages who deplore vice1 and fill their pockets to bursting by shoving the vice right in the way of the folks most likely to be stricken with deadly precision by it4 ,it is not easy to be bad-tempered over this saddening business2 one has to be pitiful4 ,as my memory travels over ,england1 and follows the tracks that ,i trod1 ,i seem to see a line of dead faces1 that start into life if ,i linger by them1 and mop and mow at me in bitterness because ,i put out no saving hand4 ,so many and many ,i saw tramping over the path of ,destruction1 and ,i do not think that ever ,i gave one of them a manly word of caution4 ,it was not my place1 ,i thought1 and thus their bones are bleaching1 and the memory of their names has flown away like a mephitic vapour that was better dispersed4 ,are there many like me1 ,i wonder1 who have not only done nothing to battle with the mightiest modern evil1 but have half encouraged it through cynical recklessness and pessimism8 ,we entrap the poor and the base and the wretched to their deaths1 and then we cry out about their vicious tendencies1 and their improvidence1 and all the rest4 ,heaven knows ,i have no right to sermonize2 but1 at least1 ,i never shammed anything4 ,when ,i saw some spectacle of piercing misery caused by ,drink 7as nearly all ,english misery is7 ,i simply choked down the tendency to groan1 and grimly resolved to see all ,i could and remember it4 ,but now that ,i have had time to reflect instead of gazing and moaning1 ,i have a sharp conception of the thing that is biting at ,england's vitals4 ,people fish out all sorts of wondrous and obscure causes for crime4 ,as far as ,england is concerned ,i should lump the influences provocative of crime and productive of misery into one--,i say ,drink is the root of almost all evil4 ,it is heartbreaking to know what is going on at our own doors1 for1 however we may shuffle and blink1 we cannot disguise the fact that many millions of human beings who might be saved pass their lives in an obscene hell--and they live so in merry ,england4 ,durst any one describe a lane in ,sandgate1 ,newcastle-on-,tyne1 a court off ,orange ,street or ,lancaster ,street1 ,london1 an alley in ,manchester1 a four-storey tenement in the ,irish quarter of ,liverpool8 ,i think not1 and it is perhaps best that no description should be done2 for1 if it were well done it would make harmless people unhappy1 and if it were ill done it would drive away sympathy4 ,i only say that all the horrors of those places are due to alcohol alone4 ,do not say that idleness is answerable for the gruesome state of things2 that would be putting cause for effect4 ,a man finds the pains of the world too much for him2 he takes alcohol to bring on forgetfulness2 he forgets1 and he pays for his pleasure by losing alike the desire and capacity for work4 ,the man of the slums fares exactly like the gentleman3 both sacrifice their moral sense1 both become idle2 the bad in both is ripened into rankness1 and makes itself villainously manifest at all seasons2 the good is atrophied1 and finally dies4 ,goodness may take an unconscionable time a-dying1 but it is sentenced to death by the fates from the moment when alcoholism sets in1 and the execution is only a matter of time4 ,england1 then1 is a country of grief4 ,i never yet knew one family which had not lost a cherished member through the national curse2 and thus at all times we are like the wailing nation whereof the first-born in every house was stricken4 ,it is an awful sight1 and as ,i sit here alone ,i can send my mind over the sad ,england which ,i know1 and see the army of the mourners4 ,they say that the calling of the wounded on the field of ,bordino was like the roar of the sea3 on my battle-field1 where drink has been the only slayer1 there are many dead2 and ,i can imagine that ,i hear the full volume of cries from those who are stricken but still living4 ,the vision would unsettle my reason if ,i had not a trifle of ,hope remaining4 ,the philosophic individual who talks in correctly frigid phrases about the evils of the ,liquor ,trade may keep his reason balanced daintily and his nerve unhurt4 ,but ,i have images for company--images of wild fearsomeness4 ,there is the puffy and tawdry woman who rolls along the street goggling at the passengers with boiled eye4 ,the little pretty child says1 ,oh6 mother1 what a strange woman4 ,i didn't understand what she said4 ,my pretty1 that was ,drink1 and you may be like that one of these days1 for as little as your mother thinks it1 if you ever let yourself touch the ,curse carelessly4 ,bless you1 ,i know scores who were once as sweet as you who can now drink any costermonger of them all under the stools in the ,haymarket bar4 ,the young men grin and wink as that staggering portent lurches past3 ,i do not smile2 my heart is too sad for even a show of sadness4 ,then there are the children--the children of ,drink they should be called1 for they suck it from the breast1 and the venomous molecules become one with their flesh and blood1 and they soon learn to like the poison as if it were pure mother's milk4 ,how they hunger--those little children6 ,what obscure complications of agony they endure and how very dark their odd convulsive species of existence is made1 only that one man may buy forgetfulness by the glass4 ,if ,i let my imagination loose1 ,i can hear the immense army of the young crying to the dumb and impotent sky1 and they all cry for bread4 ,mercy6 how the little children suffer6 ,and ,i have seen them by the hundred--by the thousand--and only helped from caprice2 ,i could do no other4 ,the iron winter is nearing us1 and soon the dull agony of cold will swoop down and bear the gnawing hunger company while the two dire agencies inflict torture on the little ones4 ,were it not for ,drink the sufferers might be clad and nourished2 but then ,drink is the support of the ,state1 and a few thousand of raw-skinned1 hunger-bitten children perhaps do not matter4 ,then ,i can see all the ruined gentlemen1 and all the fine fellows whose glittering promise was so easily tarnished2 they have crossed my track1 and ,i remember every one of them1 but ,i never could haul back one from the fate toward which he shambled so blindly2 what could ,i do when ,drink was driving him8 ,if ,i could not shake off the memories of squalor1 hunger1 poverty--well-deserved poverty--despair1 crime1 abject wretchedness1 then life could not be borne4 ,i can always call to mind the wrung hands and drawn faces of well-nurtured and sweet ladies who saw the dull mask of loathsome degradation sliding downward over their loved one's face4 ,of all the mental trials that are cruel1 that must be the worst--to see the light of a beloved soul guttering gradually down into stench and uncleanness4 ,the woman sees the decadence day by day1 while the blinded and lulled man who causes all the indescribable trouble thinks that everything is as it should be4 ,the ,drink mask is a very scaring thing2 once you watch it being slowly fitted on to a beautiful and spiritual face you do not care over-much about the revenue4 ,and now the famous ,russian's question comes up3 ,what shall we do8 ,well1 so far as the wastrel poor are concerned1 ,i should say1 ,catch them when young1 and send them out of ,england so long as there is any place abroad where their labour is sought4 ,i should say so1 because there is not a shadow of a chance for them in this country3 they will go in their turn to drink as surely as they go to death4 ,as to the vagabond poor whom we have with us now ,i have no hope for them2 we must wait until death weeds them out1 for we can do nothing with them nor for them4 ,among the classes who are better off from the worldly point of view1 we shall have sacrifices offered to the fiend from time to time4 ,drink has wound like some ubiquitous fungus round and round the tissues of the national body1 and we are sure to have a nasty growth striking out at intervals4 ,it tears the heart-strings when we see the brave1 the brilliant1 the merry1 the wise1 sinking under the evil clement in our appalling dual nature1 and we feel1 with something like despair1 that we cannot be altogether delivered from the scourge yet awhile4 ,i have stabs of conscience when ,i call to mind all ,i have seen and remember how little ,i have done1 and ,i can only hope1 in a shame-faced way1 that the use of intoxicants may be quietly dropped1 just as the practice of gambling1 and the habit of drinking heavy1 sweet wines1 have passed away from the exclusive society in which cards used to form the main diversion4 ,frankly speaking1 ,i have seen the degradation1 the abomination1 and the measureless force of ,drink so near at hand that ,i am not sanguine4 ,i can take care of myself1 but ,i am never really sure about many other people1 and ,i had good reason for not being sure of myself4 ,one thing is certain1 and that is that the creeping enemy is sure to attack the very last man or woman whom you would expect to see attacked4 ,when the first symptoms are seen1 the stricken one should be delivered from ennui as much as possible1 and then some friend should tell1 in dull1 dry style1 the slow horror of the drop to the ,pit4 ,fear will be effective when nothing else will4 ,many are stronger than ,i am and can help more4 ,by the memory of broken hearts1 by the fruitless prayers of mothers and sorrowing wives1 for the sake of the children who are forced to stay on earth in a living death1 ,i ask the strong to help us all4 ,blighted lives1 wrecked intellects1 wasted brilliancy1 poisoned morality1 rotted will--all these mark the road that the ,king of ,evils takes in his darksome progress4 ,out of the depths ,i have called for aid and received it1 and now ,i ask aid for others1 and ,i shall not be denied4 ,october1 #ahhi4 ,,voyaging ,,at ,,sea ,a philosopher has described the active life of man as a continuous effort to forget the facts of his own existence4 ,it is vain to pin such philosophers to a definite meaning2 but ,i think the writer meant vaguely to hint in a lofty way that the human mind incessantly longs for change4 ,we all crave to be something that we are not2 we all wish to know the facts concerning states of existence other than our own2 and it is this craving curiosity that produces every form of social and spiritual activity4 ,yet1 with all this restless desire1 this uneasy yearning1 only a few of us are ever able to pass beyond one piteously narrow sphere1 and we rest in blank ignorance of the existence that goes on without the bounds of our tiny domain4 ,how many people know that by simply going on board a ship and sailing for a couple of days they would pass practically into another moral world1 and change their mental as well as their bodily habits8 ,i have been moved to these reflections by observing the vast amount of nautical literature which appears during the holiday season1 and by seeing the complete ignorance and misconception which are palmed off upon the public4 ,it is a fact that only a few ,english people know anything about the mightiest of ,god's works4 ,to them life on the ocean is represented by a series of phrases which seem to have been transplanted from copy-books4 ,they speak of the bounding main1 the raging billows1 seas mountains high1 the breath of the gale1 the seething breakers1 and so on2 but regarding the commonplace1 quiet everyday life at sea they know nothing4 ,strangely enough1 only ,mr4 ,clark ,russell has attempted to give in literary form a vivid1 veracious account of sea-life1 and his thrice-noble books are far too little known1 so that the strongest maritime nation in the whole world is ignorant of vital facts concerning the men who make her prosperity4 ,let any one who is well informed enter a theatre when a nautical drama is presented2 he will find the most ridiculous spectacle that the mind of man can conceive4 ,on one occasion1 when a cat came on to the stage at ,drury ,lane and ran across the heaving billows of the canvas ocean1 the audience roared with laughter2 but to the judicious critic the real cause for mirth was the behaviour of the nautical persons who figured in the drama4 ,the same ignorance holds everywhere4 ,seamen scarcely ever think of describing their life to people on shore1 and the majority of landsmen regard a sea-voyage as a dull affair1 to be begun with regret and ended with joy4 ,dull6 ,alas1 it is dull for people who have dim eyes and commonplace minds2 but for the man who has learned to gaze aright at the ,creator's works there is not a heavy minute from the time when the dawn trembles in the gray sky until the hour when1 with stars and sea-winds in her raiment1 night sinks on the sea4 ,dull6 ,as well describe the rush of the turbulent ,strand or the populous splendour of ,regent ,street by that word6 ,i have always held that a man cannot be considered as educated if he is unable to wait an hour in a railway-station for a train without ennui4 ,what is education good for if it does not give us resources which may enable us to gather delight or instruction from every sight and sound that may fall on our nerves8 ,the most melancholy spectacle in the world is presented by the stolid citizen who yawns over his ,bradshaw while the swift panoramas of ,charing ,cross or ,euston are gliding by him4 ,men who are rightly constituted find delight in the very quietude and isolation of sea-life2 they know how to derive pure entertainment from the pageant of the sky and the music of winds and waters1 and they experience a piquant delight by reason of the contrast between the loneliness of the sea and the eager struggling life of the ,city4 ,proceeding1 as is my custom1 by examples1 ,i shall give precise descriptions of specimen days which anybody may spend on the wandering wastes of the ocean4 ,all things pertaining to the life of man are of interest to me1 said the ,roman2 and he showed his wisdom by that saying4 ,dawn4 ,along the water-line a pale leaden streak appears1 and little tremulous ripples of gray run gently upwards1 until a broad band of mingled white and scarlet shines with cold radiance4 ,the mystery of the sea is suddenly removed1 and we can watch the strange serpentine belts that twine and glitter all round from our vessel to the horizon4 ,the light is strong before the sun appears2 and perhaps that brooding hour1 when ,nature seems to be turning in her sleep1 is the best of the whole day4 ,the dew lies thickly on deck1 and the chill of the night hangs in the air2 but soon a red arc looms up gorgeously at the sea-line2 long rays spread out like a sheaf of splendid swords on the blue2 there is1 as it were1 a wild dance of colour in the noble vault1 where cold green and pink and crimson wind and flush and softly glide in mystic mazes2 and then--the sun6 ,the great flaming disc seems to poise for a little1 and all around it--pierced here and there by the steely rays--the clouds hang like tossing scarlet plumes4 ,like a warrior-angel sped ,on a mighty mission1 ,light and life about him shed-- ,a transcendent vision6 ,mailed in gold and fire he stands1 ,and1 with splendours shaken1 ,bids the slumbering seas and lands ,quicken and awaken4 ,day is on us4 ,dreams are dumb1 ,thought has light for neighbour2 ,room6 ,the rival giants come-- ,lo1 the ,sun and ,labour6 ,after witnessing that lordly spectacle1 who can wonder at ,zoroaster8 ,as the lights from east and west meet and mingle1 and the sky rears its blue immensity1 it is hard to look on for very gladness4 ,i shall suppose that we are on a small vessel--for1 if we sail in a liner1 or even in an ordinary big steamer1 it is somewhat like moving about on a floating factory4 ,the busy life of a sailor begins1 for ,jack rarely has an idle minute while he is on deck4 ,landsmen can call in help when their house needs repairing1 but sailors must be able to keep every part of their house in perfect order2 and there is always something to be done4 ,but we are lazy2 we toil not1 neither do we tar ropes1 and our main business is to get up a thoroughly good appetite while we watch the deft sailor-men going about their business4 ,it is my belief that a landsman might spend a month without a tedious hour1 if he would only take the trouble to watch everything that the men do and find out why it is done4 ,ages on ages of storm and stress are answerable for the most trifling device that the sailor employs4 ,how many and many lives were lost before the ,norsemen learned to support the masts of their winged dragons by means of bull's-hide ropes6 ,how many shiploads of men were laid at the mercy of the travelling seas before the ,scandinavians learned to use a fixed rudder instead of a huge oar6 ,not a bolt or rope or pulley or eyelet-hole has been fixed in our vessel save through the bitter experience of centuries2 one might write a volume about that mainsail1 showing how its rigid1 slanting beauty and its tremendous power were gradually attained by evolution from the ugly square lump of matting which swung from the masthead of ,mediterranean craft4 ,but we must not philosophise2 we must enjoy4 ,the fresh morning breeze runs merrily over the ripples and plucks off their crests2 our vessel leans prettily1 and you hear a tinkling hiss as she shears through the lovely green hillocks4 ,sometimes she thrusts away a burst of spray1 and in the midst of the white spurt there shines a rainbow4 ,it may happen that the rainbows come thickly for half an hour at a time1 and then we seem to be passing through a fairy scene4 ,go under the main-yard and look away to leeward4 ,the wind roars out of the mainsail and streams over you in a cold flood2 but you do not mind that1 for there is the joyous expanse of emerald and snow dancing under the glad sun4 ,there is something unspeakably delightful in the rushing never-ending procession of waves that passes away1 away in merry ranks to the shining horizon2 and all true lovers of the sea are exhilarated by the sweet tumult4 ,remember ,i am talking about a fine day2 ,i shall come to the bad weather in good time4 ,on this ineffable morning a lady may come up and walk briskly in the crisp air2 but indeed women are the best and coolest of sailors in any weather when once their preliminary troubles are over4 ,the hours fly past1 and we hail the announcement of breakfast with a sudden joy which tells of gross materialism4 ,i may say1 by-the-way1 that our lower nature1 or what sentimental persons call our lower nature1 comes out powerfully at sea1 and men of the most refined sort catch themselves in the act of wondering time after time when meals will be ready4 ,for me ,i think that it is no more gross to delight in flavours than it is to delight in colours or harmonies1 and one of my main reasons for dwelling on the delights of the sea lies in the fact that the voyager learns to take an exquisite1 but quite rational1 delight in the mere act of eating4 ,i know that ,i ought to speak as though dinner were an ignoble institution2 ,i know that the young lady who said1 ,thanks--,i rarely eat1 represented a class who pretend to devote themselves to higher joys2 but ,i decline to talk cant on any terms1 and ,i say that the healthy1 hearty hunger bestowed by the open sea is one of ,god's good gifts4 ,the sweet morning passes away1 and somehow our thoughts run in bright grooves4 ,that is the strange thing about the sea--its moods have an instant effect on the mind2 and1 as it changes with wild and swift caprice1 the seafarer finds that his views of life alter with tantalizing but pleasant suddenness4 ,just now ,i am speaking only of content and exhilaration2 but ,i may soon see another side of the picture4 ,the afternoon glides by like the morning2 no churlish houses and chimney-pots hide the sun1 and we see him describe his magnificent curve1 while1 with mysterious potency1 he influences the wind4 ,dull6 ,why1 on shore we should gaze out on the same streets or fields or trees2 but here our residence is driven along like a flying cloud1 and we gain a fresh view with every mile6 ,i confess that ,i like sailing in populous waters1 for indeed the lonely tropical seas and the brassy skies are not by any means to be regarded as delightful2 but for the present we are supposing ourselves to be in the track of vessels1 and there is some new and poignant interest for every hour4 ,watch this vast pallid cloud that looms up far away2 the sun strikes on the cloud1 and straightway the snowy mass gleams like silver2 on it comes1 and soon we see a superb four-masted clipper broadside on to us4 ,a royal fabric she is2 every snowy sail is drawing1 and she moves with resistless force and matchless grace through the water1 while a boiling wreath of milky foam rushes away from her bows1 and swathes of white dapple the green river that seems to pour past her majestic sides4 ,the emigrants lean over the rail1 and gaze wistfully at us4 ,ah1 how many thousands of miles they must travel ere they reach their new home6 ,strange and pitiful it is to think that so few of them will ever see the old home again2 and yet there is something bright and hopeful in the spectacle1 if we think not of individuals1 but of the world's future4 ,under the ,southern ,cross a mighty state is rising2 the inevitable movement of populations is irresistible as the tides of mid-ocean2 and those wistful emigrants who quietly wave their handkerchiefs to us are about to assist in working out the destiny of a new world4 ,dull6 ,the passing of that great vessel gives matter for grave thought4 ,she swings away1 and we may perhaps try to run alongside for a while1 but the immense drag of her four towers of canvas soon draws her clear1 and she speedily looms once more like a cloud on the horizon4 ,good-bye6 ,the squat collier lumbers along1 and her leisurely grimy skipper salutes as we near him4 ,it is marvellous to reflect that the whole of our coal-trade was carried on in those queer tubs only sixty years ago4 ,they are passing away1 and the gallant1 ignorant1 comical race of sailors who manned them has all but disappeared2 the ugly sordid iron box that goes snorting past us1 belching out jets of water from her dirty side--that is the agency that destroyed the colliers1 and1 alas1 destroyed the finest breed of seamen that ever the world saw6 ,so rapidly do new sights and sounds greet us that the night steals down almost before we are aware of its approach4 ,the day is for joy2 but1 ah1 the night is for subtle overmastering rapture1 for pregnant gloom1 for thoughts that lie too deep for tears6 ,if a wind springs up when the last ray of the sun shoots over the shoulder of the earth1 then the ship roars through an inky sea1 and the mysterious blending of terror and ecstasy cannot be restrained4 ,hoarsely the breeze shrieks in the cordage1 savagely the water roars as it darts away astern like a broad fierce white flame4 ,the vessel seems to spring forward and shake herself with passion as the sea retards her1 and the whole wild symphony of humming ropes1 roaring water1 screaming wind1 sets every pulse bounding4 ,should the moon shine out from the charging clouds1 then earth has not anything to show more fair2 the broad track of light looks like an immeasurable river peopled by fiery serpents that dart and writhe and interwind1 until the eye aches with gazing on them4 ,sleep seems impossible at first1 and yet by degrees the poppied touch lulls our nerves1 and we slumber without heeding the harrowing groans of the timbers or the confused cries of the wind4 ,so much for the glad weather2 but1 when the sky droops low1 and leaping waves of mournful hue seem to rear themselves and mingle with the clouds1 then the gladness is not so apparent4 ,still the exulting rush of the ship through the gray seas and her contemptuous shudder as she shakes off the masses of water that thunder down on her are fine to witness4 ,even a storm1 when cataracts of hissing water plunge over the vessel and force every one to hang on anywhere1 is by no means without its delights2 but ,i must candidly say that a ship is hardly the place for a woman when the wild winds try their strength against the works of man4 ,on the whole1 if we reckon up the pains and pleasures of life on board ship1 the balance is all in favour of pleasure4 ,the sailors have a toilsome life1 and must endure much2 but they have health4 ,it is the sense of physical well-being that makes the mind so easy when one is on the sea2 and refined men who have lived in the forecastle readily declare that they were happy but for the invariable dirt4 ,instead of trooping to stuffy lodgings1 those of my readers who have the nerve should1 if not this year1 then next summer1 go right away and take a cheap and charming holiday on the open sea4 ,october1 #ahhg4 ,,war4 ,the brisk ,pressmen are usually exceedingly busy in calculating the chances of a huge fight--indeed they spend a good part of each year in that pleasing employment4 ,smug diplomatists talk glibly about war clearing the air2 and the crowd--the rank and file--chatter as though war were a pageant quite divorced from wounds and death1 or a mere harmless hurly-burly where certain battalions receive thrashings of a trifling nature4 ,it is saddening to notice the levity with which the most awful of topics is treated1 and especially is it sad to see how completely the women and children are thrust out of mind by belligerent persons4 ,we who have gazed on the monster of ,war1 we who have looked in the whites--or rather the reds--of his loathsome eyes1 cannot let this burst of frivolity work mischief without one temperate word of warning and protest4 ,pleasant it is to watch the soldiers as they march along the streets1 or form in their superb lines on parade4 ,no man or woman of any sensibility can help feeling proudly stirred when a ,cavalry regiment goes by4 ,the clean1 alert1 upright men1 with their sure seat2 the massive war-horses champing their bits and shaking their accoutrements3 the rhythmic thud of hoofs1 the keen glitter of steel1 and the general air of power1 all combine to form a spectacle that sets the pulses beating faster4 ,then1 again1 observe the strange elastic rhythm of the march as a battalion of tall ,highlanders moves past4 ,the fifes and drums cease1 there is a silence broken only by that sinuous beautiful onward movement of lines of splendid men1 until the thrilling scream of the pipes shatters the air1 and the mad tumult of warlike sound makes even a ,southron's nerves quiver4 ,then1 once more1 watch the deadly1 steady march of a regiment of ,guards4 ,the stalwart men step together1 and1 as the red ranks sway on1 it seems as though no earthly power could stand against them4 ,the gloomy bearskins are like a brooding dark cloud1 and the glitter of the rifle-barrels carries with it certain sinister terrible suggestions4 ,the gaiety and splendour of ,cavalry and ,infantry all gain increased power over the imagination since we know that each of those gaily clad fellows would march to his doom without a tremor or a murmur if he received the word4 ,poor ,tommy ,atkins is surrounded by a sort of halo in the popular imagination1 simply because it is known that he may one day have to deal forth death to an enemy1 or take his own doom1 according to the chances of combat4 ,i need say little about the field-days and reviews which have caused so many martially-minded young men to take the shilling4 ,the crash of the small-arm firing1 the wild galloping of hasty aides-de-camp1 the measured movement of serried lines1 the rapid flight of flocks of bedizened staff-officers1 all make up a very exciting and confusing picture1 and many a youngster has fancied that war must be a glorious game4 ,let us leave the picturesque and theatrical business and come to the dry prose4 ,so far from being an affair of glitter1 excitement1 fierce joy1 fierce triumph1 war is but a round of hideous hours which bring memories of squalor1 filth1 hunger1 wretchedness1 dull toil1 unspeakable misery4 ,take it at its best1 and consider what a modern engagement really means4 ,recollect1 moreover1 that ,i am about to use sentences accurate as a photograph4 ,the sportive ,pressman says1 ,vernon began to find the enemy's cloud of sharp-shooters troublesome1 so the #eth sought better cover on the right1 leaving ,brown free to develop his artillery fire4 ,troublesome6 ,translate that word1 and it means this3 ,private ,brown and ,private ,jones are lying behind the same low bank4 ,jones raises his head2 there comes a sound like ,roo-o-osh--pht6--then a horrible thud4 ,jones glares1 grasps at nothing with convulsed hands1 and rolls sideways with a long shudder4 ,the ball took him in the temple4 ,serjeant ,morrison says1 ,now1 men1 try for that felled log6 ,double6 ,a few men make a short rush1 and gain the solid cover2 but one throws up his hands when half way1 gives a choking yell1 springs in the air1 and falls down limp4 ,the same thing is going on over a mile of country1 while the shell-fire is gradually gaining power--and we may be sure that the enemy are suffering at the hands of our marksmen4 ,and now suppose that an infantry brigade receives orders to charge4 ,charge6 ,the word carries magnificent poetic associations1 but1 alas1 it is a very prosaic affair nowadays6 ,the lines move onward in short rushes1 and it seems as if a swarm of ants were migrating warily4 ,the strident voices of the officers ring here and there3 the men edge their way onward3 it seems as if there were no method in the advance2 but somehow the loose wavy ranks are kept well in hand1 and the main movement proceeds like machinery4 ,i feel a bit queer1 says ,bill ,williams to a veteran friend4 ,never mind--'taint every one durst say that1 says the friend4 ,whoo-o-sh6 a muffled thump1 and the veteran falls forward1 dropping his rifle4 ,he struggles up on hands and knees1 but a rush of blood chokes him1 and he drops with a groan4 ,he will lie there for a long time before his burning throat is moistened by a cup of water1 and he knows only too well that the surgeon will merely shake his head when he sees him4 ,the brigade still advances2 gradually the sputtering crackle in their front grows into a low steady roar2 a stream of lead whistles in the air1 and the long lurid line of flame glows with the sustained glare of a fire among furze4 ,men fall at every yard1 but the hoarse murmur of the dogged advance never ceases4 ,at last the time comes for the rush4 ,the ranks are trimmed up by imperceptible degrees2 the men set their teeth1 and a strange eager look comes over many a face4 ,the eyes of the youngsters stare glassily2 they can see the wood from which the enemy must be dislodged at any price1 but they can form no definite ideas2 they merely grip their rifles and go on mechanically4 ,the word is given--the dark lines dash forward2 the firing from the wood breaks out in a crash of fury--there is a long harsh rattle1 then a chance crack like a thunder-clap1 and then a whirring like the spinning of some demoniac mill4 ,curses ring out amid a low sound of hard breathing2 the ranks are gapped here and there as a man wriggles away like a wounded rabbit1 or another bounds upward with a frantic ejaculation4 ,then comes the fighting at close quarters4 ,perhaps kind women who are misled by the newspaper-writer's brisk babblement may like to know what that means1 so ,i give the words of the best eyewitness that ever gazed on warfare4 ,he took down his notes by the light of burning wood1 and he had no time to think of grammar4 ,all his words were written like mere convulsive cries1 but their main effect is too vivid to be altered4 ,notice that he rarely concludes a sentence1 for he wanted to save time1 and the bullets were cutting up the ground and the trees all round him4 ,patches of the wood take fire1 and several of the wounded1 unable to move1 are consumed4 ,quite large spaces are swept over1 burning the dead also2 some of the men have their hair and beards singed1 some burns on their faces and hands1 others holes burnt in their clothing4 ,the flashes of fire from the cannon1 the quick glaring flames and smoke1 and the immense roar--the musketry so general2 the light nearly bright enough for each side to see the other2 the crashing1 tramping of men--the yelling--close quarters--hand-to-hand conflicts4 ,each side stands up to it1 brave1 determined as demons2 and still the wood's on fire--still many are not only scorched--too many1 unable to move1 are burned to death4 ,who knows the conflict1 hand-to-hand--the many conflicts in the dark--those shadowy1 tangled1 flashing1 moon-beamed woods--the writhing groups and squads--the cries1 the din1 the cracking guns and pistols1 the distant cannon--the cheers and calls and threats and awful music of the oaths1 the indescribable mix1 the officers' orders1 persuasions1 encouragements--the devils fully roused in human hearts--the strong shout1 ',charge1 men--charge6'--the flash of the naked swords1 and rolling flame and smoke8 ,and still the broken1 clear1 and clouded heaven2 and still again the moonlight pouring silvery soft its radiant patches over all4 ,there is a description vivid as lightning1 though there is not a properly-constructed sentence in it4 ,gruesome1 cruel1 horrible6 ,is it not enough to make the women of our sober sensible race declare for ever against the flaunting stay-at-homes who would egg us on to war8 ,by all means let us hold to the old-fashioned dogged ways1 but let us beware of rushing into the squalid vortex of war4 ,and now let us see what follows the brilliant charge and bayonet fight4 ,how many ladies consider what the curt word wounded means8 ,it conveys no idea to them1 and they are too apt to stray off into the dashing details that tell of a great wrestle of armies4 ,one eminent man--whom ,i believe to have uttered a libel--has declared that women like war1 and that they are usually the means of urging men on4 ,he is a very sedate and learned philosopher who wrote that statement1 and yet ,i cannot believe it4 ,ah1 no6 ,our ladies can give their dearest up to death when the ,state calls on them1 but they will never be like the odious viragoes of the ,roman circus4 ,at any rate1 if any woman acts according to the dictum of the philosopher after reading my bitterly true words1 we shall hold that our influence is departed4 ,therefore with ruthless composure ,i follow my observer--a man whose pure and holy spirit upheld him as he ministered to sufferers for year after year4 ,then the camps of the wounded4 ,oh1 heavens1 what scene is this8 ,is this indeed humanity--these butchers' shambles8 ,there are several of them4 ,there they lie1 in the largest1 in an open space in the woods--from two to three hundred poor fellows4 ,the groans and screams1 the odour of blood mixed with the fresh scent of the night1 the grass1 the trees--that slaughter-house6 ,oh1 well is it their mothers1 their sisters1 cannot see them1 cannot conceive1 and never conceived such things6 ,one man is shot by a shell both in the arm and leg2 both are amputated--there lie the rejected members4 ,some have their legs blown off1 some bullets through the breast1 some indescribably horrid wounds in the head--all mutilated1 sickening1 torn1 gouged out1 some in the abdomen1 some mere boys4 ,alas1 ,i have quoted enough--and may never such a task come before me again6 ,the picture is sharp as an etching2 it is drawn with a shudder of the soul4 ,is that grim sedate man right when he says that women are the moving influence that drives men to such carnage8 ,would you wantonly advocate war8 ,never6 ,i reject the solemn philosopher's saying1 in spite of his logic and his sententiousness4 ,who shall speak of the awful monotony of the hospital camps1 where men die like flies1 and where regret1 sympathy1 kindness are blotted from the hardened soldier's breast8 ,people are not cruel by nature1 but the vague picturesque language of historians and other general writers prevents men and women from forming just opinions4 ,i believe that1 if one hundred wounded men could be transported from a battle-field and laid down in the public square of any town or city for the population to see1 then the gazers would say among themselves1 ,so this is war1 is it8 ,well1 for our parts1 we shall be very cautious before we raise any agitation that might force our ,government into any conflict4 ,we can die if our liberties are threatened1 for there are circumstances in which it would be shameful to live1 but we shall never do anything which may bring about results such as those before us4 ,that would be a fair and temperate mode of talking--far different from the airy babble of the warlike scribe4 ,an argumentative person may stop us here and ask1 ,are you of opinion that it is possible to abolish warfare8 ,unfortunately1 we can cherish no such pleasing hope4 ,i do emphatically believe that in time men will come to see the wild folly of engaging in sanguinary struggles2 but the growth of their wisdom will be slow4 ,action and reaction are equal2 the fighting instinct has been impressed on our nature by hereditary transmission for countless generations1 and we cannot hope suddenly to make man a peaceful animal any more than we can hope to breed setters from ,south ,african wild dogs4 ,but the conditions of life are gradually changing1 and the very madness which has made ,europe into a huge barrack may work its own cure4 ,the burden will probably grow so intolerable that the most embruted of citizens will ask themselves why they bear it1 and a rapid revolution may undo the growth of centuries4 ,the scientific men point to the huge warfare that goes on from the summit of the ,himalayas to the depths of the ocean slime1 and they ask how men can be exempt from the universal struggle for existence4 ,but it is by no means certain that the pressure of population in the case of man will always force on struggles--at any rate1 struggles that can be decided only by death and agony4 ,little by little we are learning something of the laws that govern our hitherto mysterious existence1 and we have good hopes that by and by our race may learn to be mutually helpful1 so that our span of life may be passed with as much happiness as possible4 ,men will strive against each other1 but the striving will not be carried on to an accompaniment of slaughter and torture4 ,there are keen forms of competition which1 so far from being painful1 give positive pleasure to those who engage in them2 there are triumphs which satisfy the victor without mortifying the vanquished2 and1 in spite of the indiscreet writers who have called forth this ,essay1 ,i hold that such harmless forms of competition will take the place of the brutal strife that adds senselessly to the sum of human woe4 ,our race has outgrown so many forms of brutality1 so many deliberate changes have taken place in the course of even two thousand years1 that the final change which shall abolish war is almost certain to come4 ,we find that about one thousand nine hundred years ago a polished gentleman like ,julius ,caesar gravely congratulates himself on the fact that his troops destroyed in cold blood forty thousand people--men1 women1 and children4 ,no man in the civilized world dare do such a deed now1 even if he had the mind for the carnage4 ,the feeling with which we read ,caesar's frigid recital measures the arc of improvement through which we have passed4 ,may the improvement go on6 ,we can continue to progress only through knowledge2 if our people--our women especially--are wantonly warlike1 then our action will be wantonly warlike2 knowledge alone can save us from the guilt of blood1 and that knowledge ,i have tried to set forth briefly4 ,by wondrous ways does our ,master work out ,his ends4 ,let us pray that ,he may hasten the time when nation shall not rise up against nation1 neither shall they draw the sword any more4 ,december1 #ahhf4 ,,drink4 ,i have no intention of imitating those intemperate advocates of temperance who frighten people by their thunderous and extravagant denunciations2 ,i leave high moral considerations on one side for the present1 and our discussion will be purely practical1 and1 if possible1 helpful4 ,the duty of helpful men and women is not to rave about horrors and failures and misfortunes1 but to aim coolly at remedial measures2 and ,i am firmly convinced that such remedial measures can be employed only by private effort4 ,state interference is always to be deprecated2 individual action alone has power to better the condition of our sorely-tempted race4 ,with sorrow too keen for words1 ,i hear of blighted homes1 intellects abased1 children starved1 careers wrecked1 wives made wretched1 crime fostered2 and ,i fully sympathize with the men and women who are stung into wild speech by the sight of a curse that seems all-powerful in ,britain4 ,but ,i prefer to cultivate a sedate and scientific attitude of mind2 ,i do not want to repeat catalogues of evils2 ,i want to point out ways whereby the intemperate may be cured4 ,above all1 ,i wish to abate the panic which paralyzes the minds of some afflicted people1 and which causes them to regard a drunkard or even a tippler as a hopeless victim4 ,hopeless is a word used by ignorant persons1 by cowards1 and by fools4 ,when ,i hear some mourner say1 ,alas6 we can do nothing with him--he is a slave6 ,i feel impelled to reply1 ,what do you know about it8 ,have you given yourself the trouble to do more than preach8 ,listen1 and follow the simple directions which ,i lay down for you4 ,first1 ,i deal with the unhappy beings who are called periodical drinkers4 ,these are generally men who possess great ability and a capacity for severe stretches of labour4 ,they may be artists1 writers1 men of business1 mechanicians--anything2 but in nearly every case some special faculty of brain is developed to an extraordinary degree1 and the man is able to put forth the most strenuous exertions at a pinch4 ,let us name some typical examples4 ,turner was a man of phenomenal industry1 but at intervals his temperament craved for some excitement more violent and distracting than any that he could get from the steady strain of daily work4 ,he used to go away to ,wapping1 and spend weeks in the filthiest debauch with the lowest characters in ,london4 ,none of his companions guessed who he was2 they only knew that he had more money than they had1 and that he behaved in a more bestial manner than any of those who frequented the ,fox under the ,hill and other pleasing hostelries4 ,turner pursued his reckless career1 till his money was gone1 and then he returned to his gruesome den and proceeded to turn out artistic prodigies until the fit came upon him once more4 ,benvenuto ,cellini was subject to similar paroxysms1 during which he behaved like a maniac4 ,our own novelist ,bulwer ,lytton disappeared at times1 and plunged into the wildest excesses among wretches whom he would have loathed when he was in his normal state of mind4 ,he used to dress himself as a navvy1 or as a sailor1 and no one would have recognized the weird intellectual face when the great writer was clad in rags1 and when the brutal mask of intoxication had fallen over his face4 ,it was during his recovery from one of these terrible visitations that he drove the woman whom he most loved from his house1 and brought on that breach which resulted in irreparable misery4 ,poor ,george ,morland1 the painter1 had wild spells of debauch1 during which he spent his time in boxing-saloons among ruffianly prize-fighters and jockeys4 ,his vice grew upon him1 his mad fits became more and more frequent1 and at last his exquisite work could be produced only when his nerve was temporarily steadied by copious doses of brandy4 ,keats1 who worshipped ,beauty1 was afflicted by seizures like those of ,turner and ,morland4 ,on one occasion he remained in a state of drunkenness for six weeks2 and it is a wonder that his marvellous mind retained its freshness at all after the poison had passed from amid the delicate tissues of the brain4 ,he conquered himself at last2 but ,i fear that his health was impaired by his few mad outbursts4 ,charles ,lamb1 who is dear to us all1 reduced himself to a pitiable state by giving way to outbreaks of alcoholic craving4 ,when ,carlyle saw him1 the unhappy essayist was semi-imbecile from the effects of drink2 and the savage ,scotsman wrote some cruel words which will unfortunately cleave to ,lamb's cherished memory for long4 ,lamb fought against his failing2 he suffered agonies of remorse2 he bitterly blamed himself for buying days of misery by nights of madness2 but the sweet soul was enchained1 and no struggles availed to work a blessed transformation4 ,read his ,confessions of a ,drunkard4 ,it is the most awful chapter in ,english literature1 for it is written out of the agony of a pure and well-meaning mind1 and its tortured phrases seem to cry out from the page that holds their misery4 ,we are placed face to face with a dread aspect of life1 and the remorseless artist paints his own pitiable case as though he longed to save his fellow-creatures even at the expense of his own self-abasement4 ,all these afflicted creatures sought the wrong remedy for the exhaustion and the nameless craving that beset them when they were spent with toil4 ,the periodic drinker takes his dive into the sensual mud-bath just at the times when eager exertion has brought on lassitude of body and mind4 ,he begins by timidly drinking a little of the deleterious stuff1 and he finds that his mental images grow bright and pleasant4 ,a moment comes to him when he would not change places with the princes of the earth1 and he endeavours to make that moment last long4 ,he fails1 and only succeeds in dropping into drunkenness4 ,on the morning after his first day he feels depressed2 but his biliary processes are undisturbed1 and he is able to begin again without any sense of nausea4 ,his quantity is increased until he gradually reaches the point when glasses of spirits are poured down with feverish rapidity4 ,his appetite is sometimes voracious1 sometimes capricious1 sometimes absent altogether4 ,his stomach becomes ulcerated1 and he can obtain release from the grinding uneasiness only by feeding the inflamed organ with more and more alcohol4 ,the liver ceases to act healthily1 the blood becomes charged with bile1 and one morning the wretch awakes feeling that life is not worth having4 ,he has slept like a log2 but all night through his outraged brain has avenged itself by calling up crowds of hideous dreams4 ,the blood-vessels of the eye are charged with bilious particles1 and these intruding specks give rise to fearful1 exaggerated images of things that never yet were seen on sea or land4 ,grim faces leer at the dreamer and make mock of him2 frightful animals pass in procession before him2 and hosts of incoherent words are jabbered in his ear by unholy voices4 ,he wakes1 limp1 exhausted1 trembling1 nauseated1 and he feels as if he must choose between suicide and--more drink4 ,if he drinks at this stage1 he is lost2 and then is the time to fix upon him and draw him by main force from the slough4 ,now some practitioners say1 ,let him drop it gradually2 and they proceed to stir every molecule of alcohol in the system into vile activity by adding small doses of wine or spirit to the deadly accumulation4 ,the man's brain is impoverished1 and the mistaken doctors proceed to impoverish it more1 so that a patient who should be cured in forty-eight hours is kept in dragging misery for a month or more4 ,the proper mode of treatment is widely different4 ,you want to nourish the brain speedily1 and at any cost1 ere the ghastly depression drives the agonized wretch to the arms of ,circe once more4 ,first1 then1 give him milk4 ,if you try milk alone1 the stomach will not retain it long1 so you must mix the nourishing fluid with soda-water4 ,half an hour afterwards administer a spoonful of meat-essence4 ,beware of giving the patient any hot fluid1 for that will damage him almost as much as alcohol4 ,continue with alternate half-hourly instalments of milk and meat-essence2 supply no solid food whatever2 and do not be tempted by the growing good spirits of your charge to let him go out of doors amid temptation4 ,at night1 after some eight hours of this rapid feeding1 you must take a risky step4 ,make sure that the drinker is calm1 and then prepare him for sleep4 ,that preparation is accomplished thus4 ,get a draught of hydrate of chloral made up1 and be sure that you describe your man's physique--this is most important--to the apothecary who serves you4 ,a very light dose will suffice1 and1 when it is swallowed1 the drugged man should be left in quietude4 ,he will sleep heavily1 perhaps for as much as twelve hours1 and no noise must be allowed to come near him4 ,if he is waked suddenly1 the consequences may be bad1 so that those who go to look at him must use precautions to ensure silence4 ,in the morning he will awake with his brain invigorated1 his muscles unagitated1 and his craving utterly gone4 ,it is like magic2 for a man who was prostrate on ,sunday morning is brisk and eager for work on ,monday at noon4 ,whenever the cured man feels his craving arise after a spell of labour1 he should at once recuperate his brain by rapidly-repeated doses of the easily-assimilated meat-essence1 and this1 with a little strong black coffee taken at short intervals1 will tide him over the evil time4 ,he saves money1 he keeps his working power1 and he gives no shock to his health4 ,since a beneficent doctor first described this cure to the ,british ,medical ,association1 hundreds have been restored and ultimately reclaimed4 ,and now as to the persons who are called soakers4 ,scattered over the country are thousands of men and women who do not go to bestial excesses1 but who steadily undermine their constitutions by persistent tippling4 ,such a man as a commercial traveller imbibes twenty or thirty nips in the course of the day2 he eats well in the evening1 though he is usually repelled by the sight of food in the morning1 and he preserves an outward appearance of ruddy health4 ,then there are the female soakers1 whom doctors find to be the most troublesome of all their patients4 ,there is not a medical man in large practice who has not a shocking percentage of lady inebriates on his list1 and the cases are hard to manage4 ,an ill-starred woman1 whose well-to-do husband is engaged in business all day1 finds that a dull life-weariness overtakes her4 ,if she has many children1 her enforced activity preserves her from danger2 but1 if she is childless1 the subtle temptation is apt to overcome her4 ,she seeks unnatural exaltation1 and the very secrecy which is necessary lends a strange zest to the pursuit of a numbing vice4 ,then we have such busy men as auctioneers1 ship-brokers1 water-clerks1 ship-captains1 buyers for great firms--all of whom are more or less a prey to the custom of standing liquors4 ,the soaker goes on without meeting any startling check for a good while2 but1 by slow degrees1 the main organs of the body suffer1 and a chronic state of alcoholic irritation is set up4 ,a man becomes suspected by his employers and slighted by his abstemious friends2 he loses health1 character1 prospects2 and yet he is invariably ready to declare that no one ever saw him the worse for drink4 ,the tippling goes on till the resultant irritation reaches an acute stage1 and the faintest disturbing cause brings on delirium tremens4 ,there is only one way with people thus afflicted4 ,they must be made to loathe alcohol1 and their nerves must at the same time be artificially stimulated4 ,the cure is not precisely easy1 but it is certain4 ,if my directions are followed out1 then a man who is in the last stage of alcoholic debility will not only regain a certain measure of health1 but he will turn with horror from the stuff that fascinated him4 ,in the case of the soaker a little wine may be given at meal-times during the first stages of the cure2 but he 7or she7 will soon reject even wine4 ,strong black coffee1 or tea1 should be given as often as possible--the oftener the better--and iced soda-water should be administered after a heavy meal4 ,take this prescription and let it be made up--,rx ,acid4 ,acet4 eight ounces4 ,sponge down the patient's spine with this fluid until the parts moistened tingle smartly2 and let this be done night and morning4 ,also get the following from your chemist--,rx ,ext4 ,cinch4 ,rub4 ,liq4 four ounces--and give one teaspoonful in water after each meal4 ,in a week the drinker will cease to desire alcohol1 and in a month he will refuse it with disgust4 ,his nerves will resume their healthy action1 and1 if he has not reached the stage of cirrhosis of the liver1 he will become well and clear-headed4 ,recollect that this remedy is almost infallible1 and then even the most greedy of literary students will hardly reproach me for placing a kind of medical chapter in the quarter usually devoted to disquisitions of another kind4 ,from every side rises the bitter cry of those who see their loved ones falling victims to the seductive scourge2 from all quarters the voices of earnest men are raised in passionate pleading2 and in every great city there are noble workers who strive to rescue their fellow-creatures from drink as from a gulf of doom4 ,my words are not addressed to the happy beings who can rejoice in the cheerfulness bestowed by wine2 ,i have before me only the fortunes of those to whom wine is a mocker4 ,far be it from me to find fault with the good and sound-hearted men and women who are never scathed by their innocent potations2 my attempt is directed toward saving the wreckages of civilization who perish in the grasp of the destroyer4 ,march1 #ahhf4 ,,concerning ,,people ,,who ,,know ,,they ,,are ,,going ,,wrong4 ,some five years ago a mere accident gave to the world one of the most gruesome and remarkable pieces of literature that has ever perhaps been seen4 ,a convict named ,fury confessed to having committed a murder of an atrocious character4 ,he was brought from prison1 put on his trial at ,durham1 and condemned to death4 ,every chance was given him to escape his doom2 but he persisted in providing the authorities with the most minutely accurate chain of evidence against himself2 and1 in the end1 there was nothing for it but to cast him for death4 ,even when the police blundered1 he carefully set them right--and he could not have proved his own guilt more clearly had he been the ablest prosecuting counsel in ,britain4 ,he held in his hand a voluminous statement which1 as it seems1 he wished to read before sentence of death was passed4 ,the ,court could not permit the nation's time to be thus expended2 so the convict handed his manuscript to a reporter--and we thus have possibly the most absolutely curious of all extant thieves' literature4 ,somewhere in the recesses of ,fury's wild heart there must have been good concealed2 for he confessed his worst crime in the interests of justice1 and he went to the scaffold with a serious and serene courage which almost made of him a dignified person4 ,but1 on his own confession1 he must have been all his life long an unmitigated rascal--a predatory beast of the most dangerous kind4 ,from his youth upward he had lived as a professional thief1 and his pilferings were various and extensive4 ,the glimpses of sordid villainy which he frankly gives are so poignantly effective that they put into the shade the most dreadful phases in the life of ,villon4 ,he was a mean sneaking wretch who supported a miserable existence on the fruits of other people's industry1 and he closed his list of crimes by brutally stabbing an unhappy woman who had never harmed him4 ,the fellow had genuine literary skill and a good deal of culture2 his confession is very different from any of those contained in the ,newgate ,calendar--infinitely different from the crude horror of the statement which ,george ,borrow quotes as a masterpiece of simple and direct writing4 ,here is ,borrow's specimen1 by-the-way--,so ,i went with them to a music-booth1 where they made me almost drunk with gin and began to talk their flash language1 which ,i did not understand--and so on4 ,but this dry simplicity is not in ,fury's line4 ,he has studied philosophy2 he has reasoned keenly2 and1 as one goes on through his terrible narrative1 one finds that he has mental capacity of a high order4 ,he was as mean a rascal as ,noah ,claypole3 and yet he had a fine clear-seeing intellect4 ,now what does this gallows-bird tell us8 ,why1 his whole argument is intended to prove that he was an ill-used victim of society6 ,such a perversion has probably never been quite equalled2 but it remains there to show us how firmly my theory stands--that the real scoundrel never knows himself to be a scoundrel4 ,had ,fury settled down in a back street and employed his genius in writing stories1 he could have earned a livelihood1 for people would have eagerly read his experiences2 but he preferred thieving--and then he turned round and blamed other people for hounding him on to theft4 ,there are wrong-doers and wrong-doers2 there are men who do ill in the world because they are entirely harmful by nature1 and they seek to hurt their fellows--there are others who err only from weakness of will4 ,i make no excuse for the weaklings2 a man or woman who is weak may do more harm than the vilest criminal1 and1 when ,i hear any one talk about that nice man who is nobody's enemy but his own1 ,i am instantly forced to remember a score or thereabouts of beings whom ,i know to have been the deadliest foes of those whom they should have cherished4 ,let us help those who err2 but let us have no maudlin pity4 ,moralists in general have made a somewhat serious error in supposing that one has only to show a man the true aspect of any given evil in order to make sure of his avoiding it4 ,of late so many sad things have been witnessed in public and private life that one is tempted to doubt whether abstract morality is of any use whatever in the world4 ,one may tell a man that a certain course is dangerous or fatal2 one may show by every device of logic and illustration that he should avoid the said course1 and he will fully admit the truth of one's contentions2 yet he is not deterred from his folly1 and he goes on toward ruin with a sort of blind abandonment4 ,blind1 ,i say4 ,that is but a formal phrase2 for it happens that the very men and women who wreck their lives by doing foolish things are those who are keenest in detecting folly and wisest in giving advice to others4 ,educate the people1 and you will find that a steady diminution of vice1 debauchery1 and criminality must set in4 ,i am not talking about criminality at present2 but ,i am bound to say that no amount of enlightenment seems to diminish the tendency toward forms of folly which approach criminality4 ,it is almost confounding to see how lucid of mind and how sane in theoretical judgment are the men who sometimes steep themselves in folly and even in vice4 ,a wicked man boasted much of his own wickedness to some fellow-travellers during a brief sea-voyage4 ,he said1 ,i like doing wrong for the sake of doing it4 ,when you know you are outraging the senses of decent people there is a kind of excitement about it4 ,this contemptible cynic told with glee stories of his own vileness which made good men look at him with scorn2 but he fancied himself the cleverest of men4 ,with the grave nearly ready for him1 he could chuckle over things which he had done--things which proved him base1 although none of them brought him within measurable distance of the dock4 ,but such instances are quite rare4 ,the man whose vision is lucid1 but who nevertheless goes wrong1 is usually a prey to constant misery or to downright remorse4 ,look at ,burns's epitaph1 composed by himself for himself4 ,it is a dreadful thing4 ,it is more than verse2 it is a sermon1 a prophecy1 a word of doom2 and it tells with matchless terseness the story of many men who are at this hour passing to grim ruin either of body or soul or both4 ,burns had such magnificent common sense that in his last two lines he sums up almost everything that is worth saying on the subject2 and yet that fatal lack of will which ,i have so often lamented made all his theoretical good sense as naught ,he could give one every essential of morality and conduct--in theory--and he was one of the most convincing and wise preachers who ever lived2 but that mournful epitaph summarises the results of all his mighty gifts2 and ,i think that it should be learned by all young men1 on the chance that some few might possibly be warned and convinced4 ,advice is of scanty use to men of keen reason who are capable of composing precepts for themselves2 but to the duller sort ,i certainly think that the flash of a sudden revelation given in concise words is beneficial4 ,here is poor ,burns's saying-- ,is there a man whose judgment clear ,can others teach the course to steer1 ,yet runs himself life's mad career ,wild as the wave8 ,here pause1 and through the starting tear ,survey this grave4 ,the poor inhabitant below ,was quick to learn and wise to know1 ,and keenly felt the kindly glow ,and softer flame2 ,but thoughtless follies laid him low ,and stained his name4 ,reader1 attend6 ,whether thy soul ,soars fancy's flights beyond the pole2 ,or1 darkling1 grubs this earthly hole ,in low pursuit1 ,know--prudent cautious self-control ,is wisdom's root4 ,when ,i ponder that forlorn masterpiece1 ,i cannot help a tendency to despair2 for ,i know1 by multifarious experience of men1 that the curt lines hint at profundities so vast as to baffle the best powers of comprehension4 ,as ,i think of the hundreds of men who are minor copies of ,burns1 ,i have a passionate wish to call on the ,power that sways us all and pray for pity and guidance4 ,a most wise--should ,i say wise8--and brilliant man had brought himself very low through drink1 and was dying solely through the effects of a debauch which had lasted for years with scarcely an interval of pure sanity4 ,he was beloved by all2 he had a most sweet nature2 he was so shrewd and witty that it seemed impossible for him to be wrong about anything4 ,on his deathbed he talked with lovely serenity1 and he seemed rather like some thrice-noble disciple of ,socrates than like one who had cast away all that the world has worth holding4 ,he knew every folly that he had committed1 and he knew its exact proportions2 he was consulted during his last days by young and old1 who recognized the well-nigh superhuman character of his wisdom2 and yet he had abundantly proved himself to be one of the most unwise men living4 ,how strange6 ,how infinitely pathetic6 ,few men of clearer vision ever came on this earth2 but1 with his flashing eyes open1 he walked into snare after snare1 and the last of the devil's traps caught him fatally4 ,even when he was too weak to stir1 he said that1 if he could move1 he would be sure to take the old path again4 ,well may the warning devotees cry1 ,have mercy upon us6 ,well may they bow themselves and wail for the weakness of man6 ,well may they cast themselves humbly on the bosom of the ,infinite ,pity6 ,for1 of a truth1 we are a feeble folk1 and1 if we depended only on ourselves1 it would be well that ,george ,eliot's ghastly thought of simultaneous universal suicide should be put into practice speedily4 ,hark to the appalling words of wisdom uttered by the good man whose name ,i never miss mentioning because ,i wish all gentle souls to refresh themselves with his ineffable sweetness and tender fun6 ,could the youth to whom the flavour of his first wine is delicious as the opening scenes of life or the entering upon some newly-discovered paradise look upon my desolation1 and be made to understand what a dreary thing it is when a man shall feel himself going down a precipice with open eyes and a passive will--to see his destruction and have no power to stop it1 and yet to feel it all the way emanating from himself--to perceive all goodness emptied out of him1 and yet not be able to forget a time when it was otherwise--to hear about the piteous spectacle of his own self-ruin--could he see my fevered eye1 feverish with last night's drinking and feverishly looking for this night's repetition of the folly--could he feel the body of the death out of which ,i cry hourly1 with feebler and feebler outcry1 to be delivered--it were enough to make him dash the sparkling beverage to the earth in all the pride of its mantling temptation1 to make him clasp his teeth1 ,and not undo 'em ,to suffer wet damnation to run thro' 'em4 ,can that be beaten for utter lucidity and directness8 ,not by any master of prose known to us--not by any man who ever wrote in prose or in verse4 ,the vision is so completely convincing1 the sense of actuality given by the words is so haunting1 that1 not even ,dickens could have equalled it4 ,the man who wrote those searing words is to this day remembered and spoken of with caressing gentleness by all men of intellect1 refinement1 quick fancy1 genial humour2 the editing of his works has occupied a great part of the lifetime of a most distinguished ecclesiastic4 ,could he avoid the fell horror against which he warned others8 ,no4 ,with all his dread knowledge1 he went on his sorrowful way--and he remained the victim of his vice until the bitter end4 ,it was ,charles ,lamb4 ,a gambler is usually the most prodigal of men in the matter of promises4 ,if he is clever1 he is nearly always quite ready to smile mournfully at his own infatuation1 and he will warn inexperienced youngsters--unless he wants to rob them4 ,in sum1 intellect1 wit1 keenness1 lucidity of vision1 perfect reasoning power1 are all useless in restraining a man from proceeding to ruin unless some steadying agency is allied with them4 ,after much sad brooding1 ,i cannot but conclude that a fervent religious faith is the only thing that will give complete security2 and it will be a bitter day for ,england and the world if ever flippancy and irreligion become general4 ,june1 #ahhi4 ,,the ,,social ,,influence ,,of ,,the ,,bar4 ,a great ,american writer has lately given a terrible account of ,the ,social ,influence of the ,saloon in his country4 ,the article is very grave1 and every word is weighed1 but the cold precision of the paper attracts the reader with a horrible fascination4 ,the author does not so much regret the enormous waste of money1 though he allows that about two hundred millions of pounds sterling are spent yearly in the ,states on strong drink2 but he mourns most because of the steady ruin which he sees overtaking the social happiness of his country4 ,the saloon is subtly corrupting the men of ,america1 and the ghastly plagues of selfishness1 brutality1 and immorality are spreading with cruel swiftness4 ,the great author's conclusion is more than startling1 and ,i confess to having caught my breath when ,i read it4 ,he says in effect1 ,we sacrificed a million men in order to do away with slavery1 but we now have working in our midst a curse which is infinitely worse than slavery4 ,one day we shall be obliged to save ourselves from ruin1 even if we have to stamp out the trade in alcohol entirely1 and that by means of a civil war4 ,strong words--and yet the man speaks with intense conviction3 and his very quietude only serves to emphasise the awful nature of his disclosures4 ,as ,i read on ,i saw with horror that the description of the state of things in ,america accurately fits our own country4 ,we do not talk of a saloon here1 but bar means the same thing2 and the bar is crushing out the higher life of the ,english middle-class as surely as the saloon is destroying ,american manhood4 ,amid all our material prosperity1 amid all the complexities of our amazing community1 an evil is at work which gathers power daily and which is actually assassinating1 as it were1 every moral quality that has made ,england strong and beneficent4 ,begin with a picture4 ,the long curved counter glistens under the flare of the gas2 the lines of gaudy bottles gleam like vulgar1 sham jewelry2 the glare1 the glitter1 the garish refulgence of the place dazzle the eye1 and the sharp acrid whiffs of vile odour fall on the senses with a kind of mephitic influence4 ,the evening is wearing away1 and the broad space in front of the bar is crowded4 ,a hoarse crashing babble goes steadily on1 forming the ground-bass of an odious symphony2 shrill and discordant laughter rises by fits and starts above the low tumult2 a coarse joke sets one group sniggering2 a vile oath rings out from some foul-mouthed roysterer2 and at intervals some flushed and bleared creature breaks into a slavering laugh which has a sickly resemblance to weeping4 ,at one of the side-tables a sodden brute leans forward and wags his head to and fro with ignoble solemnity2 another has fallen asleep and snores at intervals with a nauseous rattle2 smart young men1 dressed fashionably1 fling chance witticisms at the busy barmaids1 and the nymphs answer with glib readiness4 ,this is the home of ,jollity and ,good-fellowship2 this is the place from which ,care is banished2 this is the happy corner where the social glass is dispensed4 ,alas for the jollity and the sociability and all the rest of it6 ,force yourself to study the vile spectacle1 and you will soon harbour a brood of aching reflections4 ,the whole of that chattering1 swilling mob are employing their muddled minds on frivolity or obscenity1 or worse things still4 ,you will hear hardly an intelligent word2 you will not catch a sound of sensible discussion2 the scraps of conversation that reach you alternate between low banter1 low squabbling1 objectionable narrative1 and histories of fights or swindles or former debauches4 ,middle-aged men tell interminable stories about money or smart strokes of business2 youngsters wink and look unspeakably wise as they talk on the subject of the spring handicaps2 wild spirits tell of their experiences at a glove-fight in some foul ,east-end tavern2 amorous exploits are detailed with a fulness and freedom which would extremely amaze the ladies who form the subject of the conversation4 ,in all the nasty confusion you never hear a word that can be called manly1 unless you are prepared to allow the manliness of pugilism4 ,each quarter-hour sees the company grow more and more incoherent2 the laughter gradually becomes senseless1 and loses the last indication of pure merriment2 the reek thickens2 the dense air is permeated with queasy smells which rise from the fusel oil and the sugared beer2 the shrewd landlord looks on with affected jollity1 and hails casual friends with effusive imitation of joy2 and last of all time is called1 and the host of men pour into the street4 ,they are ready for any folly or mischief1 and they are all more or less unfitted for the next day's work4 ,strangely enough1 many of those wretched fellows who thus waste time amid sordid surroundings come from refined homes2 but music and books and the quiet pleasant talk of mothers and sisters are tame after the delirious rattle of the bar1 and thus bright lads go home with-their wits dulled and with a complete incapacity for coherent speech4 ,now let it be remembered that no real friendships are contracted in those odious drinking-shops--something in the very atmosphere of the place seems to induce selfishness1 and a drinker who goes wrong is never pitied2 when evil days come1 the smart landlord shuns the failure1 the barmaids sneer at him1 and his boon companions shrink away as though the doomed man were tainted4 ,monstrous it is to hear the remarks made about a lost soul who is plunging with accelerated speed down the steep road to ruin4 ,his companions compare notes about him1 and all his bodily symptoms are described with truculent glee in the filthy slang of the bar4 ,so long as the wretch has money he is received with boisterous cordiality1 and encouraged to rush yet faster on the way to perdition2 his wildest feats in the way of mawkish generosity are applauded2 and the very men who drink at his expense go on plucking him and laughing at him until the inevitable crash comes4 ,i once heard with a kind of chilled horror a narrative about a fine young man who had died of delirium tremens4 ,the narrator giggled so much that his story was often interrupted2 but it ran thus--,he was very shaky in the morning1 and he began on brandy2 he took about six before his hand was steady1 and ,i saw him looking over his shoulder every now and again4 ,in the afternoon a lot of fellows came in1 and he stood champagne like water to the whole gang4 ,at six o'clock ,i wanted him to have a cup of tea1 but he said1 ',i've had nothing but booze for three days4' ,then he got on to the floor1 and said he was catching rats--so we knew he'd got 'em on4#a ,at night he came out and cleared the street with his sword-bayonet2 and it's a wonder he didn't murder somebody4 ,it took two to hold him down all night1 and he had his last fit at six in the morning4 ,died screaming6 ,a burst of laughter hailed the climax1 and then one appreciative friend remarked1 ,he was a fool--,i suppose he was drunk eleven months out of the last twelve4 ,this was the epitaph of a bright young athlete who had been possessed of health1 riches1 and all fair prospects4 ,no one warned him2 none of those who swilled expensive poisons for which he paid ever refused to accept his mad generosity2 he was cheered down the road to the gulf by the inane plaudits of the lowest of men2 and one who was evidently his companion in many a frantic drinking-bout could find nothing to say but ,he was a fool6 ,at this moment there are thousands of youths in our great towns and cities who are leading the heartless1 senseless1 semi-delirious life of the bar1 and every possible temptation is put in their way to draw them from home1 from refinement1 from high thoughts1 from chaste and temperate modes of life4 ,horrible it is to hear fine lads talking familiarly about the jumpy sensations which they feel in the morning4 ,the jumps are those involuntary twitchings which sometimes precede and sometimes accompany delirium tremens2 the frightful twitching of the limbs is accompanied by a kind of depression that takes the very heart and courage out of a man2 and yet no one who travels over these islands can avoid hearing jokes on the dismal subject made by boys who have hardly reached their twenty-fifth year4 ,the bar encourages levity1 and the levity is unrelieved by any real gaiety--it is the hysterical feigned merriment of lost souls4 ,footnote #a3 ,this is the elegant public-house mode of describing delirium tremens4 ,there are bars of a quieter sort1 and there are rooms where middle-aged topers meet1 but these are1 if possible1 more repulsive than the clattering dens frequented by dissipated youths4 ,stout staid-looking men--fathers of families--gather night after night to sodden themselves quietly1 and they make believe that they are enjoying the pleasures of good-fellowship4 ,curious it is to see how the fictitious assertion of goodwill seems to flourish in the atmosphere of the bar and the parlour4 ,those elderly men who sit and smoke in the places described as cosy are woeful examples of the effects of our national curse4 ,they are not riotous2 they are only dull1 coarse1 and silly4 ,their talk is confused1 dogmatic1 and generally senseless2 and1 when they break out into downright foulness of speech1 their comparatively silent enjoyment of detestable stories is a thing to make one shiver4 ,here again good-fellowship is absent4 ,comfortable tradesmen1 prosperous dealers1 sharp men who hold good commercial situations1 meet to gossip and exchange dubious stories4 ,they laugh a good deal in a restrained way1 and they are apparently genial2 but the hard selfishness of all is plain to a cool observer4 ,the habit of self-indigence has grown upon them until it pervades their being1 and the corruption of the bar subtly envenoms their declining years4 ,if good women could only once hear an evening's conversation that passes among these elderly citizens1 they would be a little surprised4 ,thoughtful ladies complain that women are not reverenced in ,england1 and ,americans in particular notice with shame the attitude which middle-class ,englishmen adopt towards ladies4 ,if the people who complain could only hear how women are spoken of in the homes of ,jollity1 they would feel no more amazement at a distressing social phenomenon4 ,the talk which is chuckled over by men who have daughters of their own is something to make an inexperienced individual redden4 ,reverence1 nobility1 high chivalry1 common cleanliness1 cannot flourish in the precincts of the bar1 and there is not an honest man who has studied with adequate opportunities who will deny that the social glass is too often taken to an accompaniment of sheer uncleanness4 ,why have not our moral novelists spoken the plain truth about these things8 ,we have many hideous pictures of the ,east-end drinking-bars1 and much reproachful pity is expended on the residuum2 but the evil that is eating at the very heart of the nation1 the evil that is destroying our once noble middle-class1 finds no assailant and no chronicler4 ,were it not for the athletic sports which happily engage the energies of thousands of young men1 our middle-class would degenerate with appalling rapidity4 ,but1 in spite of athletics1 the bar claims its holocaust of manhood year by year1 and the professional moralists keep silence on the matter4 ,some of them say that they cannot risk hurting the sensibilities of innocent maidens4 ,what nonsense6 ,those maidens all have a chance of becoming the wives of men who have suffered deterioration in the reek and glare of the bar4 ,how many sorrowing wives are now hiding their heart-break and striving to lure their loved ones away from the curse of curses6 ,if the moralists could only look on the mortal pathos of the letters which ,i receive1 they would see that the maidens about whom they are so nervous are the very people who should be summoned as allies in our fight against a universal enemy4 ,if our brave sweet ,english girls once learn the nature of the temptations to which their brothers and lovers are exposed1 they will use every force of their pure souls to save the men whom they can influence from a doom which is death in life4 ,may1 #ahhg4 ,,friendship4 ,the memoirs that are now poured into the book-market certainly tend to breed cynicism in the minds of susceptible persons1 for it appears that to many eminent men and women of our generation friendship was almost an unknown sentiment4 ,as we read one spiteful paragraph after another1 we begin to wonder whether the living men around us resemble the dead purveyors of scandal4 ,the fashionable mode of proceeding nowadays is to leave diaries crammed with sarcasm1 give some unhappy friend orders to wait until you are settled in the grave1 and then confound your friends and foes by attacks which come to the light long after your ears are deaf to praise and blame4 ,samuel ,wilberforce went into the choicest society that ,britain could show2 he was the confidant of many people1 and he contrived to charm all but a few cross-grained critics4 ,his good humour seemed inexhaustible2 and those who saw his cherubic face beaming sweetly on the company at banquets or assemblies fancied that so delightful a man was never known before4 ,but this suave1 unctuous gentleman1 who fascinated every one1 from ,queen to cottager1 spent a pretty fair share of his life in writing vicious witticisms and scandals concerning the folk with whom he seemed to be on affectionate terms4 ,at nights1 after spending his days in working and bowing and smiling and winning the hearts of men1 he went home and poured out all the venom that was in his heart4 ,when his memoirs appeared1 all the most select social circles in the country were driven into a serious flutter4 ,no one was spared2 and1 as some of the statements made by ,wilberforce were1 to say the least1 a little sweeping1 a violent paper warfare began1 which has hardly ceased raging even now4 ,happy and contented men who believed that the ,bishop loved and admired them were surprised to find that he had disliked and despised them4 ,moreover1 the naughty diarist had an ugly habit of recording men's private conversations2 and thus a good many sayings which should have been kept secret became public property4 ,a very irreverent wag wrote-- ,how blest was he who'd ne'er consent ,with ,wilberforce to walk1 ,nor dined with ,soapy ,sam1 nor let ,the ,bishop hear him talk6 and this crude epigram expressed the feelings of numbers of enraged and scandalized individuals4 ,the wretched book gave us an ugly picture of a hollow society where kindness seemed non-existent1 and where every man walked with his head in a cloud of poisonous flies4 ,as more memoirs appeared1 it was most funny to observe that1 while ,wilberforce was occupied in scarifying his dear friends1 some of his dear friends were occupied in scarifying him4 ,thus we find ,abraham ,hayward1 a polished leader of society1 writing in the following way of ,wilberforce1 with whom ostensibly his relations were of the most affectionate description--,wilberforce is really a low fellow4 ,again and again the committee of the ,athenaeum ,club have been obliged to reprove him for his vulgar selfishness4 ,this is dreadful6 ,no wonder that petty cynics snarl and rejoice2 they say1 ,look at your great men1 and see what mean backbiters they are6 ,alas6 ,thomas ,carlyle's memoirs are a kind of graveyard of reputations2 and we can well understand the rage and horror with which many individuals protested against the fierce ,scotchman's strictures4 ,in the hearts of thousands of noble young people ,carlyle's memory was cherished like that of some dear saint2 and it was terrible to find that the strong prophet had been penetrated by such a virus of malice4 ,carlyle met all the best men and women in ,england2 but the only ones whom he did not disparage were ,tennyson1 the ,duke of ,wellington1 ,mr4 ,froude1 and ,emerson4 ,he could not talk even of ,charles ,darwin without calling him an imbecile2 and his all-round hitting at his closest intimates is simply merciless4 ,the same perversity which made him talk of ,keats's maudlin weak-eyed sensibility caused him to describe his loyal1 generous1 high-bred friend ,lord ,houghton as a nice little robin-redbreast of a man2 while ,mrs4 ,basil ,montagu1 who cheered him and spared no pains to aid him in the darkest times1 is now immortalized by one masterly venomous paragraph4 ,carlyle was great--very great--but really the cultivation of loyal friendships seems hardly to have been in his line4 ,men who know his works by heart1 and who derived their noblest inspiration from him1 cannot bear to read his memoirs twice over1 for it sadly appears as though the ,titan had defiled the very altar of friendship4 ,what shall we say of the cunning cat-like ,charles ,greville1 who crept on tiptoe through the world1 observing and recording the littleness of men8 ,his stealthy eye missed nothing2 and the men whom he flattered and used little thought that the wizened dandy who pleased them with his old-world courtesy was chronicling their weakness and baseness for all time4 ,a nobly patriotic ,ministry came before the world with a flourish of trumpets1 and declared that ,england must fight ,russia in defence of public law1 freedom1 and other holy things4 ,but the wicked diarist had watched the secret proceedings of his dear friends2 and he informs us that those beloved intimates were all sound asleep when a single ,minister decided on the movement which cost us forty thousand men and one hundred millions of treasure4 ,that close sly being used--to worm out the secrets of men's innermost hearts2 and his impassive mask never showed a sign of emotion4 ,to illustrate his mode of extracting the information of which he made such terrible use1 ,i may tell one trivial anecdote which has never before been made public4 ,when ,greville was very old1 he went to see a spiritualistic medium who was attracting fashionable ,london4 ,the charlatan looked at the gray worn old man and thought himself safe2 four other visitors attended the sance1 but the medium bestowed all his attention on ,greville4 ,with much emotion he cried1 ,there is an aged lady behind your chair6 ,greville remarked sweetly1 ,how interesting6 ,she is very1 very like you6 ,who can it be8 murmured ,greville4 ,she lifts her hands to bless you4 ,her hands are now resting over your head6 shouted the medium2 and the pallid emotionless man said1 with a slight tremor in his voice1 ,pray tell me who this mysterious visitant may be6 ,it is your mother4 ,oh1 said ,greville1 ,i am delighted to hear that6 ,she says she is perfectly happy1 and she watches you constantly4 ,dear soul6 muttered the imperturbable one4 ,she tells me you will join her soon1 and be happy with her4 ,then ,greville said gravely1 in dulcet tones1 ,that is extremely likely1 for ,i am going to take tea with her at five o'clock6 ,he had led on the poor swindler in his usual fashion2 and he never hinted at the fact that his mother was nearly a century old4 ,his friends were pumped in the same subtle manner2 and the immortally notorious memoirs are strewn with assassinated characters4 ,as we study the phenomena indicated by these memoirs1 we begin to wonder whether friendship is or is not extinct4 ,men are gregarious1 and flocks of them meet together at all hours of the day and night4 ,they exchange conventional words of greeting1 they wear happy smiles1 they are apparently cordial and charming' one with another2 and yet a rigidly accurate observer may look mournfully for signs of real friendship4 ,how can it exist8 ,the men and women who pass through the whirl of a ,london season cannot help regarding their fellow-creatures rather as lay figures than as human beings4 ,they go to crowded balls and seething receptions1 not to hold any wise human converse1 but only to be able to say that they were in such and such a room on a certain night4 ,the glittering crowds fleet by like shadows1 and no man has much chance of knowing his neighbour's heart4 ,how fast the flitting figures come-- ,the mild1 the fierce1 the stony face2 ,some bright with thoughtless smiles1 and some ,where secret tears have left their trace6 ,ah1 it is only the faces that the tired pleasure-seeker sees and knows2 the real comrade1 the human soul1 is hidden away behind the mask6 ,genuine heroic friendship cannot flourish in an artificial society2 and that perhaps accounts for the fact that the curled darlings of our modern community spend much of their leisure in reading papers devoted to tattle and scandal4 ,it seems as though the search after pleasure poisoned the very sources of nobleness in the nature of men4 ,in our monstrous city a man may live without a quarrel for forty years2 he may be popular1 he may be received with genial greetings wherever he goes--and yet he has no friend4 ,he lingers through his little day2 and1 when he passes away1 the change is less heeded than would be the removal of a chair from a club smoking-room4 ,when ,i see the callous indifference with which illness1 misfortune1 and death are regarded by the dainty classes1 ,i can scarcely wonder when irate philosophers denounce polite society as a pestilent and demoralizing nuisance4 ,among the people airily and impudently called the lower orders noble friendships are by no means uncommon4 ,i can't bear that look on your face1 ,bill4 ,i'm coming to save you or go with you6 said a rough sailor as he sprang into a raging sea to help his shipmate4 ,i'm coming1 old fellow6 shouted the mate of a merchant-vessel2 and he dived overboard among the mountainous seas that were rolling south of ,cape ,horn one ,january4 ,for an hour this hero fought with the blinding water1 and he saved his comrade at last4 ,strange to say1 the lounging impassive dandies who regard the universe with a yawn1 and who sneer at the very notion of friendship1 develop the kindly and manly virtues when they are removed from the enervating atmosphere of ,society and forced to lead a hard life4 ,a man to whom emotion1 passion1 self-sacrifice1 are things to be mentioned with a curl of the lip1 departs on a campaign1 and amid squalor1 peril1 and grim horrors he becomes totally unselfish4 ,men who have watched our splendid military officers in the field are apt to think that a society which converts such generous souls into self-seeking fribbles must be merely poisonous4 ,the more we study the subject the more clearly we can see that where luxury flourishes friendship withers4 ,in the vast suffering ,russian nation friendships are at this very moment cherished to the heroic pitch4 ,a mighty people are awakening1 as it were1 from sleep2 the wicked and corrupt still sit in high places1 but among the weltering masses of the populace purity and nobleness are spreading1 and such friendships are fostered as never have been shadowed forth in story or song4 ,sophie ,peroffsky mounts the scaffold with four other doomed mortals2 she never thinks of her own approaching agony--she only longs to comfort her friends and she kisses them and greets them with cheering words until the last dread moment arrives4 ,poor little ,marie ,soubotine--sweetest of perverted children1 noblest of rebels--refuses to purchase her own safety by uttering a word to betray her sworn friend4 ,for three years she lingers on in an underground dungeon1 and then she is sent on the wild road to ,siberia2 she dies amid gloom and deep suffering1 but no torture can unseal her lips2 she gladly gives her life to save another's4 ,antonoff endures the torture1 but no agony can make him prove false to his friends4 ,when his captors give him a respite from the thumbscrews and the red-hot wires that are thrust under his nails1 he forgets his own torment1 and scratches on his plate his cipher signals to his comrades4 ,those men and women in that awful country are lawless and dangerous1 but they are heroic1 and they are true friends one to another4 ,how far we proud islanders must have forsaken for a time the road to nobleness when we are able to exalt the saying ,a full purse is the only true friend into a representative ,english proverb6 ,we do not rage and foam as ,timon did--that would be ill-bred and ludicrous2 we simply smile and utter delicate mockeries4 ,in the plays that best please our golden youth nothing is so certain to win applause and laughter as a sentence about the treachery or greed of friends4 ,do those grinning1 superlatively insolent cynics really represent the mighty ,mother of ,nations8 ,ah1 no6 ,if even the worst of them were thrust away into some region where life was hard for him1 he would show something like nobility and manliness2 it is the mephitic airs of ease and luxury that breed selfishness and scorn in his soul4 ,at any rate1 those effeminate people are not typical specimens of our steadfast friendly race4 ,when the folk in the colliery village hear that deadly thud and feel the shudder of the earth which tell of disaster1 ,jack the hewer rushes to the pit's mouth and joins the search-party4 ,he knows that the gas may grip him by the throat1 and that the heavy current of dissolution may creep through his veins2 but his mate is down there in the workings1 and he must needs save him or die in the attempt4 ,greater love hath no man than this4 ,ah1 yes--the poor collier is indeed ready to lay down his life for his friend6 ,the fiery soldier1 ,william ,beresford1 sees a comrade in peril2 a horde of infuriated savages are rushing up1 and there is only one pony to carry the two ,englishmen4 ,beresford calls1 ,jump up behind me6 but the friend answers1 ,no2 save yourself6 ,i can die1 and ,i won't risk your life4 ,then the undignified but decidedly gallant ,beresford observes1 ,if you don't come1 ,i'll punch your head6 ,the pony canters heavily off2 one stumble would mean death1 but the dauntless fighting man brings in his friend safely1 though only by the skin of his teeth4 ,it is absolutely necessary for the saving of our moral health that we should turn away from the dreary flippancy of an effete society to such scenes as those4 ,if we regarded only the pampered classes1 then we might well think that true human fellowship had perished1 and a starless darkness--worse almost than ,atheism--would fall on the soul4 ,but we are not all corrupt1 and the strong brave heart of our people still beats true4 ,young men cherish manly affection for friends1 and are not ashamed to show it2 sweet girls form friendships that hold until the maidens become matrons and till the shining locks have turned to silver white4 ,wherever men are massed together the struggle for existence grows keen1 and selfishness and cynicism thrust up their rank growths4 ,pleasure blunts the moral sense and converts the natural man into a noxious being2 but happily our people are sound at the core1 and it will be long ere cynicism and corruption are universal4 ,the great healthy middle-class is made up of folk who would regard a writer of spiteful memoirs as a mere bravo2 they have not perhaps the sweetness and light which ,mr4 ,arnold wished to bestow on them1 but at any rate they have a certain rough generosity1 and they have also a share of that self-forgetfulness which alone forms the basis of friendship4 ,having that1 they can do without ,carlyle's learning and ,wilberforce's polish1 and they can certainly do without the sour malice of the historian and the prelate4 ,july1 #ahhg4 ,,disasters ,,at ,,sea4 ,during last year the register of slaughter on the ocean was worse than any ever before seen since the ,royal ,charter took her crew to destruction2 and it seems as though matters were growing worse and worse4 ,one dismal old story is being repeated week in1 week out4 ,in thick weather or clear weather--it does not seem to matter which--two vessels approach each other1 and the presiding officers on board of each are quite satisfied and calm2 then1 on a sudden1 one vessel shifts her course1 there are a few hurried and maddened ejaculations1 and then comes a crash4 ,after that1 the ugly tale may be continued in the same terms over and over again2 the boats cannot be cleared away1 the vessels drift apart1 and both founder1 or one is left crippled4 ,i shall have something to say about the actual effects of a collision presently1 but ,i may first go on to name some other kinds of disaster4 ,a heavy sea is rolling1 and occasionally breaking1 and a vessel is lumbering along from crest to hollow of the rushing seas2 a big wall of water looms over her for a second1 and then comes crashing down2 the deck gives way--there are no water-tight compartments--and the ship becomes suddenly as unmanageable as a mere cask in a seaway4 ,again1 a plate is wrenched1 and some villainously-made rivets jump out of their places like buttons from an over-tight bodice2 in ten minutes the vessel is wallowing1 ready for her last plunge2 and very likely the crew have not even the forlorn chance of taking to the boats4 ,once more--on a clear night in the tropics an emigrant ship is stealing softly through the water2 the merry crowd on deck has broken up1 the women1 poor creatures1 are all locked up in their quarters1 and only a few men remain to lounge and gossip4 ,the great stars hang like lamps from the solemn dome of the sky1 and the ripples are painted with exquisite serpentine streaks2 the wind hums softly from the courses of the sails1 and some of the men like to let the cool breeze blow over them4 ,everything seems so delightfully placid and clear that the thought of danger vanishes2 no one would imagine that even a sea-bird could come up unobserved over that starlit expanse of water4 ,but the ocean is treacherous in light and shade4 ,the loungers tell their little stories and laugh merrily2 the officer of the watch carelessly stumps forward from abreast of the wheel1 looks knowingly aloft1 twirls round like a teetotum1 and stumps back again2 and the sweet night passes in splendour1 until all save one or two home-sick lingerers are happy4 ,it never occurs to any of these passengers to glance forward and see whether a streak of green fire seems to strike out from the starboard--the right-hand side of the vessel--or whether a shaft of red shoots from the other side4 ,as a matter of fact1 the vessel is going on like a dark cloud over the flying furrows of the sea2 but there is very little of the cloud about her great hull1 for she would knock a house down if she hit it when travelling at her present rate4 ,the captain is a thrifty man1 and the owners are thrifty persons2 they consider the cost of oil2 and thus1 as it is a nice clear night1 the side-lights are not lit1 and the judgment of the tramping look-out man on the forecastle-head is trusted4 ,parenthetically ,i may say that1 without being in any way disposed to harbour exaggerated sentiment1 ,i feel almost inclined to advocate death for any sailor who runs in mid-ocean without carrying his proper lights out4 ,i once saw a big iron barque go grinding right from the bulge of the bow to the stern of an ocean steamer--and that wretched barque had no lights4 ,half a yard's difference1 and both vessels would have sunk4 ,three hundred and fifty people were sleeping peacefully on board the steamer1 and the majority of them must have gone down1 while those who were saved would have had a hard time in the boats4 ,strange to say1 that very same steamer was crossed by another vessel which carried no lights3 but this time the result was bad1 for the steamer went clean through the other ship and sank her instantly4 ,to return to the emigrant vessel4 ,the officer continues his tramp like one of the caged animals of a menagerie2 the spare man of the watch leans against the rail and hums-- ,we'll go no more by the light of the moon2 ,the song is done1 and we've lost the tune1 ,so ,i'll go no more a-roving with you1 fair maid-- ,a-roving1 ,a-roving1 c4 --the pipes glow in the clear air1 and the flying water bubbles and moans4 ,oh1 yes1 all is well--beautifully well--and we need no lights whatever6 ,then the look-out man whistles ,hist6--which is quite an unusual mode of signalling2 the officer ceases his monotonous tramp and runs forward4 ,luff a little6 ,he's still bearing up4 ,why doesn't he keep away8 ,luff a little more6 ,stand by your lee-braces4 ,oh1 he'll go clear6 ,so the low clear talk goes1 till at last with a savage yell of rage a voice comes from the other vessel--,where you coming to8 ,hard down with it6 ,he's into us6 ,clear away your boats6 ,then there is a sound like smack4 ,then comes a long scraunch1 and a thunderous rattle of blocks2 a sail goes with a report like a gun2 the vessels bump a few times1 and then one draws away1 leaving the other with bows staved in4 ,a wild clamour surges up from below1 but there is no time to heed that2 the men toil like ,titans1 and the hideous music of prayers and curses disturbs the night4 ,then the vessel that was hit amidships rolls a little1 and there is a gurgle like that of an enormous1 weir3 a mast goes with a sharp report2 a man's figure appears on the taffrail and bounds far into the sea--it is an experienced hand who wants to escape the down-draught2 the hull shudders1 grows steady1 and then with one lurch the ship swashes down and the bellowing vortex throws up huge spirts of boiling spray4 ,a few stray swimmers are picked up1 but the rest of the company will be seen nevermore4 ,fancy those women in that darkened steerage6 ,think of it1 and then say what should be done to an owner who stints his officers in the matter of lamp-oil2 or to a captain who does not use what the owner provides6 ,the huddled victims wake from confused slumbers2 some scream--some become insane on the instant2 the children add their shrill clamour to the mad rout2 and the water roars in4 ,then the darkness grows thick1 and the agonized crowd tear and throttle each other in fierce terror2 and then approaches the slowly-coming end4 ,oh1 how often--how wearily often--have such scenes been enacted on the face of this fair world6 ,and all to save a little lamp-oil6 ,yet again--a great vessel plunges away to sea bearing a precious freight of some one thousand souls4 ,perhaps the owners reckon the cargo in the hold as being worth more than the human burden2 but of course opinions differ4 ,the wild rush from one border of the ocean to the other goes on for a few days and nights1 and the tremendous structure of steel cleaves the hugest waves as though they were but clouds4 ,down below the luxurious passengers live in their fine hotel1 and the luckier ones are quite happy and ineffably comfortable4 ,if a sunny day breaks1 then the pallid battalions in the steerage come up to the air1 and the ship's deck is like a long animated street4 ,a thousand souls1 we said8 ,true6 ,now let some quiet observant man of the sailorly sort go round at night and count the boats4 ,twelve1 and the gig aft makes thirteen6 ,allowing a tremendously large average1 this set of boats might actually carry six hundred persons2 but the six hundred would need to sit very carefully even in smooth water1 and a rush might capsize any one boat4 ,the vast floating hotel spins on at twenty miles an hour--a speed that might possibly shame some of the railways that run from ,london suburbs--and the officers want to save every yard4 ,no care is omitted2 three men are on the bridge at night1 there is a starboard look-out1 a port look-out1 and the quartermaster patrols amidships and sees that the masthead light is all right ,the officer and the look-out men pass the word every half-hour1 and nothing escapes notice4 ,if some unlucky steerage passenger happens to strike a light forward1 he stands a very good chance of being put in irons2 and1 if there is a patient in the deck-house1 the windows must be darkened with thick cloths4 ,each officer1 on hazy nights1 improvises a sort of hood for himself2 and he peers forward as if life depended on his eyesight--as indeed it does4 ,but there comes a bright evening1 and the monster liner's journey is all but over2 three hours more of steaming and she will be safe4 ,a little schooner comes skimming up on the port side--and the schooner is to the liner as a chip is to a tree-trunk4 ,the schooner holds on her course1 for she is not bound to give way at all2 but the officer on the bridge of the steamer thinks1 ,i shall lose a quarter of an hour if ,i edge away to starboard and let him fall astern of us4 ,i shall keep right on and shave his bows4 ,the liner is going at nineteen knots1 the schooner is romping along at eight--yet the liner cannot clear the little vessel4 ,there comes a fresh gust of wind2 the sailing vessel lies over to it1 and just touches the floating hotel amidships--but the touch is enough to open a breach big enough for a coach and four to go through4 ,the steamer's head is laid for the land and every ounce of steam is put on1 but she settles and settles more and more4 ,and now what about the thirteen boats for a thousand people8 ,there is a wild scuffling1 wild outcry4 ,women bite their lips and-try1 with divine patience1 to crush down all appearance of fear1 and to keep their limbs from trembling2 some unruly fellows are kept in check only by terror of the revolver2 and the officers remember that their fair name and their hope of earthly redemption are at stake4 ,in one case of this sort it took three mortal hours to ferry the passengers and crew over smooth water to the rescuing vessel2 and those rescued folk may think themselves the most fortunate of all created souls1 for1 if the liner had been hit with an impetus of a few more tons1 very few on board of her would have lived to tell the tale4 ,unless passengers1 at the risk of being snubbed and threatened1 criticise the boat accommodation of great steamers1 there will be such a disaster one day as will make the world shudder4 ,the pitiful thing is to know how easily all this might be prevented4 ,until one has been on board a small vessel which has every spar1 bolt1 iron1 and plank sound1 one can have no idea how perfectly safe a perfectly-built ship is in any sort of weather4 ,a schooner of one hundred and fifty tons was caught in a hurricane which was so powerful that the men had to hang on where they could1 even before the flattened foaming sea rose from its level rush and began to come on board4 ,all round were vessels in distress2 the scare caused many of the seamen to forget their lights1 and the ships lumbered on1 first to collision1 and then to that crashing plunge which takes all hands down4 ,the little schooner was actually obliged to offer assistance to a big mail-steamer--and yet she might have been rather easily carried by that same steamer4 ,but the little vessel's lights were watched with sedulous care2 the blasts might tear at her scanty canvas1 but there was not a rag or a rope that would give way2 and1 although the awful rush of the gale carried her within eight miles of a rocky lee-shore1 her captain had sufficient confidence in the goodness of his gear to begin sailing his ship instead of keeping her hove to4 ,one rope faulty1 one light wrong1 one hand out of his place at the critical time1 and the bones of a pleasant ship's company would have been strewn on a bleak shore3 but everything was right1 and the tiny craft drew away like a seagull when she was made to sail4 ,of course the sea ran clean over her1 but she forged quietly on until she was thirty miles clear of those foaming breakers that roared on the cliffs4 ,during that night more good seamen were drowned than one would like to number2 ships worth a king's ransom were utterly lost4 ,and why8 ,simply because they had not the perfect gear which saved the little schooner4 ,even had the little craft been sent over until she refused to rise again to the sea1 the boats were ready1 and everybody on board had a good chance4 ,care first of all is needed1 and then fear may be banished4 ,the smart agent reads his report glibly to the directors of a steamboat company--and yet ,i have seen such smart agents superintending the departure of vessels whereof the appearance was enough to make a good judge quake for the safety of crew and cargo4 ,what do ,i advise8 ,well1 in the first place1 ,i must remind shoregoing folk that a sound well-found vessel will live through anything4 ,let passengers beware of lines which pay a large dividend and show nothing on their balance-sheets to allow for depreciation4 ,in the next place1 if any passenger on a long voyage should see that the proper lights are not shown1 he ought to wake up his fellow passengers at any hour of the night1 and go with his friends to threaten the captain4 ,never mind bluster or oaths--merely say1 ,if your lights are not shown1 you may regard your certificate as gone4 ,if that does not bring the gentleman to his senses1 nothing will4 ,again1 take care in any case that no raw foreign seamen are allowed to go on the look-out in any vessel1 for a misunderstood shout at a critical moment may bring sudden doom on hundreds of unsuspecting fellow-creatures4 ,above all1 see that the water-casks in every boat are kept full4 ,in this way the sea tragedies may be a little lessened in their hateful number4 ,march1 #ahhi4 ,a ,,rhapsody ,,of ,,summer4 ,there came into my life a time of strenuous effort1 and ,i drank all the joys of labour to the lees4 ,when the rich dark midnights of summer drooped over the earth1 ,i could hardly bear to think of the hours of oblivion which must pass ere ,i felt the delight of work once more4 ,and the world seemed very beautiful2 and1 when ,i looked up to the solemn sky1 so sweetly sown with stars1 ,i could see stirring words like ,fame and ,gladness and ,triumph written dimly across the vault2 so that my heart was full of rejoicing1 and all the world promised fair4 ,in those immortal midnights the sea spoke wonderful things to me1 and the long rollers glittering under the high moon bore health and bright promise as they hastened to the shore4 ,and1 when the ships stole--oh1 so silently6--out of the shadows and moved over the diamond track of the moon's light1 ,i sent my heart out to the lonely seamen and prayed that they might be joyous like me4 ,then the ringing of the song of multitudinous birds sounded in the hours of dawn1 and the tawny-throated king of songsters made my pulses tremble with his wild ecstasy2 and the blackbird poured forth mellow defiance1 and the thrush shrilled in his lovely fashion concerning the joy of existence4 ,pass1 dreams6 ,the long beams are drawn from the bosom of dawn4 ,the gray of the quiet sea quickens into rose1 and soon the glittering serpentine streaks of colour quiver into a blaze2 the brown sands glow1 and the little waves run inward1 showing milky curves under the gay light2 the shoregoing boats come home1 and their sails--those coarse tanned sails--are like flowers that wake with the daisies and the peonies to feast on the sun4 ,happy holiday-makers who are wise enough to watch the fishers come in6 ,the booted thickly-clad fellows plunge into the shallow water2 and then the bare-footed women come down1 and the harvest of the night is carried up the cliffs before the most of the holiday-folk have fairly awakened4 ,the proud day broadens to its height1 and the sands are blackened by the growing crowd2 for the beach near a fashionable watering-place is like a section cut from a turbulent city street1 save that the folk on the sands think of aught but business4 ,i have never been able to sympathize with those who can perceive only vulgarity in a seaside crowd4 ,it is well to care for deserted shores and dark moaning forests in the far ,north2 but the average ,british holiday-maker is a sociable creature2 he likes to feel the sense of companionship1 and his spirits rise in proportion to the density of the crowd amid which he disports himself4 ,to me1 the life1 the concentrated enjoyment1 the ways of the children who are set free from the trammels of town life1 are all like so much poetry4 ,i learned early to rejoice in silent sympathy with the rejoicing of ,god's creatures4 ,only to watch the languid pose of some steady toiler from the ,city is enough to give discontented people a goodly lesson4 ,the man has been ground in the mill for a year2 his modest life has left him no time for enjoyment1 and his ideas of all pleasure are crude4 ,watch him as he remains passively in an ecstasy of rest4 ,the cries of children1 the confused jargon of the crowd1 fall but faintly on his nerves2 he likes the sensation of being in company2 he has a dim notion of the beauty of the vast sky with its shining snowy-bosomed clouds1 and he lets the light breeze blow over him4 ,i like to look on that good citizen and contrast the dull round of his wayfarings on many streets with the ease and satisfaction of his attitude on the sands4 ,then the night comes4 ,the dancers are busy1 the commonplace music is made refined by distance1 and the murmur of the sea gathers power over all other sounds1 until the noon of night arrives and the last merry voices are heard no more4 ,poor harmless revellers1 so condemned by men whose round of life is a search for pleasure6 ,many of you do not understand or care for quiet refinements of dress and demeanour2 you lack restraint2 but ,i have felt much gladness while demurely watching your abandonment4 ,i could draw rest for my soul from the magnetic night long after you were aweary and asleep2 but much of my pleasure came as a reflection from yours4 ,as my memories of sweetness--yes1 and of purifying sadness--gather more thickly1 ,i am minded to wonder that so much has been vouchsafed me rather than to mourn over shadowy might-have-beens4 ,the summer day by the deep lovely lake--the lake within sound of the sea6 ,all round the steep walls that shut in the dark glossy water there hung rank festoons and bosses of brilliant green1 and the clear reflections of the weeds and flowers hung so far down in the mysterious deeps that the height of the rocky wall seemed stupendous4 ,far over in one tremendously deep pool the lazy great fish wallowed and lunged2 they would not show their speckled sides very much until the evening2 but they kept sleepily moving all day1 and sometimes a mighty back would show like a log for an instant4 ,in the morning the modest ground-larks cheeped softly among the rough grasses on the low hills1 while the proud heaven-scaler--the lordly kinsman of the ground-lark--filled the sky with his lovely clamour4 ,sometimes a water-rail would come out from the sedges and walk on the surface of the lake as a tiny ostrich might on the shifting sand2 pretty creatures of all sorts seemed to find their homes near the deep wonderful water1 and the whole morning might be passed in silently watching the birds and beasts that came around4 ,the gay sun made streams of silver fire shoot from the polished brackens and sorrel1 the purple geraniums gleamed like scattered jewels1 and the birds seemed to be joyful in presence of that manifold beauty--joyful as the quiet human being who watched them all4 ,and the little fishes in the shallows would have their fun as well4 ,they darted hither and thither2 the spiny creatures which the schoolboy loves built their queer nests among the waterweeds2 and sometimes a silly adventurer--alarmed by the majestic approach of a large fish--would rush on to the loamy bank at the shallow end of the lake and wriggle piteously in hopeless failure4 ,the afternoons were divinely restful by the varied shores of the limpid lake4 ,sometimes as the sun sloped there might come hollow blasts of wind that had careered for a brief space over the woods2 but the brooding heat1 the mastering silence1 the feeling that multifarious quiescent living things were ready to start into action1 all took the senses with somnolence4 ,that drowsy joy1 that soothing silence which seemed only intensified by the murmur of bees and the faint gurgle of water1 were like medicine to the soul2 and it seemed that the conception of ,nirvana became easily understood as the delicious open-air reverie grew more and more involved and vague4 ,then the last look of the sun1 the creeping shadows that made the sea gray and turned the little lake to an inky hue1 and then the slow fall of the quiet-coloured evening1 and1 last1 the fall of the mystic night6 ,poor little birds1 moving uneasily in the darkness1 threw down tiny fragments from the rocks1 and each fragment fell with a sound like the clink of a delicate silver bell2 softly the sea moaned1 softly the night-wind blew1 and softly--so softly6--came whispering the spirits of the dead4 ,joyous faces could be seen by that lake long1 long ago4 ,in summer1 when the lower rim was all blazing with red and yellow flowers1 young lovers came to whisper and gaze4 ,they are dead and gone4 ,in winter1 when the tarn was covered with jetty glossy ice1 there were jovial scenes whereof the jollity was shared by a happy few4 ,round and round on the glossy surface the skaters flew and passed like gliding ghosts under the gloom of the rocks2 the hiss of the iron sounded musically1 and the steep wall flung back sharp echoes of harmless laughter4 ,each volume of sound was magically magnified1 and the gay company carried on their pleasant outing far into the chili winter night4 ,they are all gone6 ,one was there oftenest in spring and summer1 and the last sun-rays often made her golden hair shine in splendour as she stood gazing wistfully over the solemn lake4 ,she saw wonders there that coarser spirits could not know2 and all her gentle musings passed into poetry--poetry that was seldom spoken4 ,those who loved her never cared to break her sacred stillness as she pondered by the side of the beloved tarn2 her language was not known to common folk1 for she held high converse with the great of old time2 and1 when she chanced to speak with me1 ,i understood but dimly1 though ,i had all the sense of beauty and mystery4 ,a shipwrecked sailor said she looked as if she belonged to ,god4 ,her ,master claimed her early4 ,dear1 your yellow hair will shine no more in the sun that you loved2 you have long given over your day-dreams--and you are now dreamless4 ,or perhaps you dwell amid the silent glory of one last long dream of those you loved4 ,the gorse on the moor moans by your grave1 the brackens grow green and tall and wither into dead gold year by year1 the lake gleams gloomily in fitful flashes amid its borders of splendour2 and you rest softly while the sea calls your lullaby nightly4 ,far off1 far off1 my soul1 by quiet seas where the lamps of the ,southern ,cross hang in the magnificence of the purple sky1 there is one who remembers the lake1 and the glassy ice1 and the blaze of pompous summer1 and the shining of that yellow hair4 ,peace--oh1 peace6 ,the sorrow has passed into quiet pensive regret that is nigh akin to gladness4 ,how many other ineffable days and nights have ,i known8 ,all who can feel the thrilling of sea-winds1 all who can have even one day amid grass and fair trees1 grasp the time of delight1 enjoy all beauties1 do not pass in coarseness one single minute2 and then1 when the ,guide comes to point your road through the strange gates1 you may be like me--you may repine at nothing1 for you will have much good to remember and scanty evil4 ,it is good for me now to think of the thundering rush of the yacht as1 with the great mainsail drawing heavily1 she roared through the field of foam made by her own splendid speed1 while the inky waves on the dim horizon moaned and the dark summer midnight brooded warmly over the dark sea4 ,it is good to think of the strange days when the vessel was buried in wreaths of dark cloud1 and the rush of the wind only drove the haze screaming among the shrouds4 ,the vast dim mountains might not be pleasant to the eye of either seaman or landsman2 but1 when they poured their thundering deluge on a strong safe deck1 we did not mind them4 ,happy hearts were there even in stormy warring afternoons2 and men watched quite placidly as the long grim hills came gliding on4 ,then in the evenings there were chance hours when the dim forecastle was a pleasant place in bad weather4 ,the bow of the vessel swayed wildly2 the pitching seemed as if it might end in one immense supreme dive to the gulf1 and the mad storming of the wind forced us to utter our simple talk in loudest tones4 ,gruff kindly phrases1 without much wit or point1 were good enough for us2 perhaps even the appalling dignitary--yes1 even the mate--would crawl in2 and we listened to lengthy disjointed stories4 ,and all the while the tremendous howl of the storm went on1 and the merry lads who went out on duty had to rush wildly so as to reach the alley when a very heavy sea came over4 ,the sense of strength was supreme2 the crash of the gale was nothing2 and we rather hugged ourselves on the notion that the fierce screaming meant us no harm4 ,the curls of smoke flitted softly amid the blurred yellow beams from the lamp1 and our chat went on while the monstrous billows grew blacker and blacker and the spray shone like corpse-candles on the mystic and mighty hills4 ,and then the hours of the terrible darkness6 ,to leave the swept deck while every vein tingled with the ecstasy of the gale6 ,the dull warmth below was exquisite2 the sly creatures which crept from their1 dens and let the lamplight shine on their weird eyes--even the gamesome rats--had something merrily diabolic about them4 ,their thuds on the floor1 their sordid swarming1 their inexplicable daring--all gave a kind of minor current of diablerie to the rush and hurry of the stormy night2 for they seemed to speak--and the creatures which on shore are odious appeared to be quite in place in the soaring groaning vessel4 ,ah1 my brave forecastle lads1 my merry tan-faced favourites1 ,i shall no more see your quaint squalor1 ,i shall no more see your battle with wind and savage waves and elemental turmoil6 ,some of you have passed to the shadows before me2 some of you have only the ooze for your graves2 and the others cannot ever hear my greeting again on the sweet mornings when the waves are all gay with lily-hued blossoms of foam4 ,pale beyond porch and portal1 ,crowned with dark flowers she stands1 ,who gathers all things mortal ,with cold immortal hands4 ,gathers6 ,and ,proserpina will strew the flowers of foam that ,i may never see more--and then she will gather me4 ,all was good in the time of delight--all is good now that only a memory clings lovingly to the heart4 ,take my counsel4 ,rejoice in your day1 and the night shall carry no dread for you4 ,june1 #ahhi4 ,,lost ,,days4 ,i fully recognize the fact which the ,frenchman flippantly stated--that no human beings really believe that death is inevitable until the last clasp of the stone-cold king numbs their pulses4 ,perhaps this insensibility is a merciful gift2 at any rate1 it is a fact4 ,if belief came home with violence to our minds1 we should suffer from a sort of vertigo2 but the merciful dullness which the ,frenchman perceived and mocked in his epigram saves us all the miseries of apprehension4 ,this is very curiously seen among soldiers when they know that they must soon go into action4 ,the soldiers chat together on the night before the attack2 they know that some of them must go down2 they actually go so far as to exchange messages thus--,if anything happens to me1 you know1 ,bill1 ,i want you to take that to the old people4 ,you give me a note or anything else you have2 and1 if we get out of the shindy1 we can hand the things back again4 ,after confidences of this sort1 the men chat on2 and ,i never yet knew or heard of one who did not speak of his own safe return as a matter of course4 ,when a brigade charges1 there may be a little anxiety at first2 but the whistle of the first bullet ends all misgivings1 and the fellows grow quite merry1 though it may be that half of them are certain to be down on the ground before the day is over4 ,a man who is struck may know well that he will pass away3 but he will rise up feebly to cheer on his comrades--nay1 he will ask questions1 as the charging troops pass him1 as to the fate of ,bill or ,joe1 or the probable action of the ,heavies1 or similar trifles4 ,in the fight of life we all behave much as the soldiers do in the crash and hurry of battle4 ,if we reason the matter out with a semblance of logic1 we all know that we must move toward the shadows2 but1 even after we are mortally stricken by disease or age1 we persist in acting and thinking as if there were no end4 ,in youth we go almost further2 we are too apt to live as though we were immortal1 and as though there were absolutely nothing to result from human action or human inaction4 ,to the young man and the young woman the future is not a blind lane with a grave at the end2 it is a spacious plain reaching away towards a far-off horizon2 and that horizon recedes and recedes as they move forward1 leaving magnificent expanses to be crossed in joyous freedom4 ,a pretty delusion6 ,the youth harks onward1 singing merrily and rejoicing in sympathy with the mystic song of the birds2 there is so much space around him--the very breath of life is a joy--and he is content to taste in glorious idleness the ecstasy of living4 ,the evening closes in1 and then the horizon seems to be narrowing2 like the walls of the deadly chamber in the home of the ,inquisition1 the skies shrink inward--and the youth has misgivings4 ,the next day finds his plain shrunken a little in expanse1 and his horizon has not so superb a sweep4 ,nevertheless he goes gaily on1 and once more he raises his voice joyously1 and tries to think that the plain and the horizon can contract no more4 ,thus in foolish hopefulness he passes his days until the glorious plain of his dreams has been traversed1 and1 lo1 under his very feet is the great gulf fixed1 and far below the tide--the tide of ,eternity--laps sullenly against the walls of the deadly chasm4 ,if the youth knew that the gulf and the rolling river were so near--if he not only knew1 but could absolutely picture his doom--would he be so merry8 ,ah1 no6 ,i repeat that1 if men could be so disciplined as to believe in their souls that death must come1 then there would be no lost days4 ,is there one of us who can say that he never lost a day amid this too brief1 too joyous1 too entrancing term of existence8 ,not one4 ,the aged ,roman--who1 by-the-way1 was somewhat of a prig--used to go about moaning1 ,i have lost a day1 if he thought he had not performed some good action or learned something in the twenty-four hours4 ,most of us have no such qualms2 we waste the time freely2 and we never know that it is wasted until with a dull shock we comprehend that all must be left and that the squandered hours can never be retrieved4 ,the men who are strongest and greatest and best suffer the acutest remorse for the lost days2 they know their own powers1 and that very knowledge makes them suffer all the more bitterly when they reckon up what they might have done and compare it with the sum of their actual achievement4 ,in a certain ,german town a little cell is shown on the walls of which a famous name is marked many times4 ,it appears that in his turbulent youth ,prince ,bismarck was often a prisoner in this cell2 and his various appearances are registered under eleven different dates4 ,moreover1 ,i observe from the same rude register that he fought twenty-eight duels4 ,lost days--lost days6 ,he tells us how he drank in the usual insane fashion prevalent among the students4 ,he cannot tell how much ,burgundy he could really drink4 ,lost days--lost days6 ,and now the great old man1 with ,europe at his feet and the world awaiting his lightest word with eagerness1 turns regretfully sometimes to think of the days thrown away4 ,a haze seems to hang before the eyes of such as he2 and it is a haze that makes the future seem dim and vast1 even while it obscures all the sharp outlines of things4 ,the child is not capable of reasoning coherently1 and therefore its disposition to fritter away time must be regarded as only the result of defective organization2 but the young man and young woman can reason1 and yet we find them perpetually making excuses for eluding time and eternity4 ,look at the young fellows who are preparing for the hard duties of life by studying at a ,university4 ,here is one who seems to have recognized the facts of existence2 his hours are arranged as methodically as his heart beats2 he knows the exact balance between physical and intellectual strength1 and he overtaxes neither1 but body and mind are worked up to the highest attainable pressure4 ,no pleasures of the destructive sort call this youngster aside2 he has learned already what it is to reap the harvest of a quiet eye1 and his joys are of the sober kind4 ,he rises early1 and he has got far through his work ere noon2 his quiet afternoon is devoted to harmless merriment in the cricket-field or on the friendly country roads1 and his evening is spent without any vain gossip in the happy companionship of his books4 ,that young man loses no day2 but unhappily he represents a type which is but too rare4 ,the steady man1 economic of time1 is a rarity2 but the wild youth who is always going to do something to-morrow is one of a class that numbers only too many on its rolls4 ,to-morrow6 ,the young fellow passes to-day on the river1 or spends it in lounging or in active dissipation4 ,he feels that he is doing wrong2 but the gaunt spectres raised by conscience are always exorcised by the bright vision of to-morrow4 ,to-morrow the truant will go to his books2 he will bend himself for that concentrated effort which alone secures success1 and his time of carelessness and sloth shall be far left behind4 ,but the sinister influence of to-day saps his will and renders him infirm2 each new to-day is wasted amid thoughts of visionary to-morrows which take all the power from his soul2 and1 when he is nerveless1 powerless1 tired1 discontented with the very sight of the sun1 he finds suddenly that his feet are on the edge of the gulf1 and he knows that there will be no more to-morrows4 ,i am not entering a plea for hard1 petrifying work4 ,if a man is a hand-worker or brain-worker1 his fate is inevitable if he regards work as the only end of life4 ,the loss of which ,i speak is that incurred by engaging in pursuits which do not give mental strength or resource or bodily health4 ,the hard-worked business-man who gallops twenty miles after hounds before he settles to his long stretch of toil is not losing his day2 the empty young dandy whose life for five months in the year is given up to galloping across grass country or lounging around stables is decidedly a spendthrift so far as time is concerned4 ,i wish--if it be not impious so to wish--that every young man could have one glimpse into the future4 ,supposing some good genius could say1 ,if you proceed as you are now doing1 your position in your fortieth year will be this6 what a horror would strike through many among us1 and how desperately each would strive to take advantage of that kindly ,if4 ,but there is no uplifting of the veil2 and we must all be guided by the experience of the past and not by knowledge of the future4 ,i observe that those who score the greatest number of lost days on the world's calendar always do so under the impression that they are enjoying pleasure4 ,an acute observer whose soul is not vitiated by cynicism may find a kind of melancholy pastime in observing the hopeless attempts of these poor son's to persuade themselves that they are making the best of existence4 ,i would not for worlds seem for a moment to disparage pleasure1 because ,i hold that a human being who lives without joy must either become bad1 mad1 or wretched4 ,but ,i speak of those who cheat themselves into thinking that every hour which passes swiftly to eternity is wisely spent4 ,observe the parties of young men who play at cards even in the railway-train morning after morning and evening after evening4 ,the time of the journey might be spent in useful and happy thought2 it is passed in rapid and feverish speculation4 ,there is no question of reviving the brain2 it is not recreation that is gained1 but distraction1 and the brain1 instead of being ready to concentrate its power upon work1 is enfeebled and rendered vague and flighty4 ,supposing a youth spends but one hour per day in handling pieces of pasteboard and trying to win his neighbour's money1 then in four weeks he has wasted twenty-four hours1 and in one year he wastes thirteen days4 ,is there any gain--mental1 muscular1 or nervous--from this unhappy pursuit8 ,not one jot or tittle4 ,supposing that a weary man of science leaves his laboratory in the evening1 and wends his way homeward1 the very thought of the game of whist which awaits him is a kind of recuperative agency4 ,whist is the true recreation of the man of science2 and the astronomer or mathematician or biologist goes calmly to rest with his mind at ease after he has enjoyed his rubber4 ,the most industrious of living novelists and the most prolific of all modern writers was asked--so he tells us in his autobiography--,how is it that your thirtieth book is fresher than your first8 ,he made answer1 ,i eat very well1 keep regular hours1 sleep ten hours a day1 and never miss my three hours a day at whist4 ,these men of great brain derive benefit from their harmless contests2 the young men in the railway-carriages only waste brain-tissue which they do nothing-to repair4 ,a very beautiful writer who was an extremely lazy man pictures his own lost days as arising before him and saying1 ,i am thy ,self2 say1 what didst thou to me8 ,that question may well be asked by all the host of murdered days1 but especially may it be asked of those foolish beings who try to gain distinction by recklessly losing money on the ,turf or in gambling-saloons4 ,a heart of stone might be moved by seeing the precious time that is hurled to the limbo of lost days in the vulgar pandemonium by the racecourse4 ,a nice lad comes out into the world after attaining his majority1 and plunges into that vortex of ,hades4 ,reckon up the good he gets there4 ,does he gain health8 ,alas1 think of the crowd1 the rank odours1 the straining heart-beats6 ,does he hear any wisdom8 ,listen to the hideous badinage1 the wild bursts of foul language from the betting-men1 the mean1 cunning drivel of the gamblers1 the shrill laughter of the horsey and unsexed women8 ,does the youth make friends8 ,ah1 yes6 ,he makes friends who will cheat him at betting1 cheat him at horse-dealing1 cheat him at gambling when the orgies of the course are over1 borrow money as long as he will lend1 and throw him over when he has parted with his last penny and his last rag of self-respect4 ,those who can carry their minds back for twenty years must remember the foolish young nobleman who sold a splendid estate to pay the yelling vulgarians of the betting-ring4 ,they cheered him when he all but beggared himself2 they hissed him when he failed once to pay4 ,with lost health1 lost patrimony1 lost hopes1 lost self-respect1 he sank amid the rough billows of life's sea1 and only one human creature was there to aid him when the great last wave swept over him4 ,lost days--lost days6 ,youths who are going to ruin now amid the plaudits of those who live upon them might surely take warning3 but they do not1 and their bones will soon bleach on the mound whereon those of all other wasters of days have been thrown4 ,when ,i think of the lost days and the lost lives of which ,i have cognizance1 then it seems as though ,i were gazing on some vast charnel-house1 some ghoul-haunted place of skulls4 ,memories of those who trifled with life come to me1 and their very faces flash past with looks of tragic significance4 ,by their own fault they were ruined2 they were shut out of the garden of their gifts2 their city of hope was ploughed and salted4 ,the past cannot be retrieved1 let canting optimists talk as they choose2 what has been has been1 and the effects will last and spread until the earth shall pass away4 ,our acts our angels are1 or good or ill2 our fatal shadows that walk by us still4 ,the thing done lasts for eternity2 the lightest act of man or woman has incalculably vast results4 ,so it is madness to say that the lost days can be retrieved4 ,they cannot6 ,but by timely wisdom we may save the days and make them beneficent and fruitful in the future4 ,watch those wild lads who are sowing in wine what they reap in headache and degradation4 ,night after night they laugh with senseless glee1 night after night inanities which pass for wit are poured forth2 and daily the nerve and strength of each carouser grow weaker4 ,can you retrieve those nights8 ,never6 ,but you may take the most shattered of the crew and assure him that all is not irretrievably lost2 his weakened nerve may be steadied1 his deranged gastric functions may gradually grow more healthy1 his distorted views of life may pass away4 ,so far1 so good2 but never try to persuade any one that the past may be repaired1 for that delusion is the very source and spring of the foul stream of lost days4 ,once impress upon any teachable creature the stern fact that a lost day is lost for ever1 once make that belief part of his being1 and then he will strive to cheat death4 ,perhaps it may be thought that ,i take sombre views of life4 ,no2 ,i see that the world may be made a place of pleasure1 but only by learning and obeying the inexorable laws which govern all things1 from the fall of a seed of grass to the moving of the miraculous brain of man4 ,april1 #ahhh4 ,,midsummer ,,days ,,and ,,midsummer ,,nights4 ,soon1 with pomp of golden days and silver nights1 the dying ,summer will wave the world farewell2 but the precious time is still with us1 and we cherish the glad moments gleefully4 ,when the dawn swirls up in the splendid sky1 it is as though one gladsome procession of hours had begun to move4 ,the breeze sighs cool and low1 the trees rustle with vast whisperings1 and the conquering sun shoots his level volleys from rim to rim of the world4 ,the birds are very1 very busy1 and they take no thought of the grim time coming1 when the iron ground will be swept by chill winds and the sad trees will quiver mournfully in the biting air4 ,a riot of life is in progress1 and it seems as if the sense of pure joy banished the very thought of pain and foreboding from all living things4 ,the sleepy afternoons glide away1 the sun droops1 and the quiet1 coloured evening falls solemnly4 ,then comes the hush of the huge and thoughtful night2 the wan stars wash the dust with silver1 and the brave day is over4 ,alas1 for those who are pent in populous cities throughout this glorious time6 ,we who are out in the free air may cast a kindly thought on the fate of those to whom holiday must be as a word in an unknown tongue4 ,some of us are happy amid the shade of mighty hills3 some of us fare toward the ,land of the ,midnight ,sun1 where the golden light steeps all the air by night as well as day2 some of us rest beside the sea1 where the loud wind1 large and free1 blows the long surges out in sounding bars and thrills us with fresh fierce pleasure2 some of us are able to wander in glowing lanes where the tender roses star the hedges and the murmur of innumerable bees falls softly on the senses4 ,let us thankfully take the good that is vouchsafed to us1 and let those of us who can lend a helping hand do something towards giving the poor and needy a brief taste of the happiness that we freely enjoy4 ,i do not want to dwell on ugly thoughts2 and yet it seems selfish to refrain from speaking of the fate of the poor who are packed in crowded quarters during this bright holiday season4 ,for them the midsummer days and midsummer nights are a term of tribulation4 ,the hot street reeks with pungent odours1 the faint airs that wander in the scorching alleys at noonday strike on the fevered face like wafts from some furnace1 and the cruel nights are hard to endure save when a cool shower has fallen4 ,if you wander in ,london byways1 you find that the people are fairly driven from their houses after a blistering summer day1 and they sit in the streets till early morning4 ,they are not at all depressed2 on the contrary1 the dark hours are passed in reckless merriment1 and ,i have often known the men to rest quite contentedly on the pavement till the dawn came and the time of departure for labour was near4 ,even the young children remain out of doors1 and their shrill treble mingles with the coarse rattle of noisy choruses4 ,some of those cheery youngsters have an outing in the hopping season1 and they come back bronzed and healthy2 but most of them have to be satisfied with one day at the most amid the fields and trees4 ,i have spoken of ,london2 but the case of those who dwell in the black manufacturing cities is even worse4 ,what is ,oldham like on a blistering midsummer day8 ,what are ,hanley and ,st4 ,helen's and the lower parts of ,manchester like8 ,the air is charged with dust1 and the acrid1 rasping fumes from the chimneys seem to acquire a malignant power over men and brain4 ,toil goes steadily on1 and the working-folk certainly have the advantage of starting in the bright morning hours1 before the air has become befouled2 but1 as the sun gains strength1 and the close air of the unlovely streets is heated1 then the torment to be endured is severe4 ,in ,oldham and many other ,lancashire towns a most admirable custom prevails4 ,large numbers of people club their money during the year and establish a holiday-fund2 they migrate wholesale in the summertime1 and have a merry holiday far away from the crush of the pavements and the dreary lines of ugly houses4 ,a wise and beneficent custom is this1 and the man who first devised it deserves a monument4 ,i congratulate the troops of toilers who share my own pleasure2 but1 alas1 how many honest folk in those awful ,midland places will pant and sweat and suffer amid grime and heat while the glad months are passing6 ,good men who might be happy even in the free spaces of the ,far ,west1 fair women who need only rest and pure air to enable them to bloom in beauty1 little children who peak and pine1 are all crammed within the odious precincts of the towns which ,cobbett hated2 and the merry stretches of the sea1 the billowy roll of the downs1 the peace of soft days1 are not for them4 ,only last year ,i looked on a stretch of interminable brown sand1 hard and smooth and broad1 with the ocean perpetually rolling in upon it with slow-measured sweep1 with rustle and hiss and foam1 and many a thump as of low bass drums4 ,there before me was ,whitman's very vision1 and in the keen mystic joy of the moment ,i could not help thinking sadly of one dreadful alley where lately ,i had been4 ,it seemed so sad that the folk of the alley could not share my pleasure2 and the murmur of vain regrets came to the soul even amid the triumphant clamour of the free wind4 ,poor cramped townsfolk1 hard is your fate6 ,it is hard2 but ,i can see no good in repining over their fortune if we aid them as far as we can2 rather let us speak of the bright time that comes for the toilers who are able to escape from the burning streets4 ,the mathematicians and such-like dry personages confine midsummer to one day in ,june2 but we who are untrammelled by science know a great deal better4 ,for us midsummer lasts till ,august is half over1 and we utterly refuse to trouble ourselves about equinoxes and solstices and trivialities of that kind4 ,for us it is midsummer while the sun is warm1 while the trees hold their green1 while the dancing waves fling their blossoms of foam under the darting rays that dazzle us1 while the sacred night is soft and warm and the cool airs are wafted like sounds of blessings spoken in the scented darkness4 ,for us the solstice is abolished1 and we sturdily refuse to give up our midsummer till the first gleam of yellow comes on the leaves4 ,we are not all lucky enough to see the leagues upon leagues of overpowering colour as the sun comes up on the ,alps2 we cannot all rest in the glittering seclusion of ,norwegian fiords2 but most of us1 in our modest way1 can enjoy our extravagantly prolonged midsummer beside the shore of our ,british waters4 ,spring is the time for hope2 our midsummer is the time for ripened joy1 for healthful rest2 and we are satisfied with the beaches and cliffs that are hallowed by many memories--we are satisfied with simple copses and level fields4 ,they say that spring is the poet's season2 but we know better4 ,spring is all very well for those who have constant leisure2 it is good to watch the gradual bursting of early buds2 it is good to hear the thrush chant his even-song of love2 it is good to rest the eye on the glorious clouds of bloom that seem to float in the orchards4 ,but the midsummer1 the gallant midsummer1 pranked in manifold splendours1 is the true season of poetry for the toilers4 ,the birds of passage who are now crowding out of the towns have had little pleasure in the spring1 and their blissful days are only now beginning4 ,what is it to them that the seaside landlady crouches awaiting her prey8 ,what is it to them that ',arry is preparing to make night hideous8 ,they are bound for their rest1 and the surcease of toil is the only thing that suggests poetry to them4 ,spring the season for poets6 ,we wipe away that treasonable suggestion just as we have wiped out the solstice4 ,we holiday makers are not going to be tyrannized over by literary and scientific persons1 and we insist on taking our own way4 ,our blood beats fully only at this season1 and not even the extortioners' bills can daunt us4 ,let us break into poetry and flout the maudlin enthusiasts who prate of spring4 ,with a ripple of leaves and a twinkle of streams ,the full world rolls in a rhythm of praise1 ,and the winds are one with the clouds and beams-- ,midsummer days6 ,midsummer days6 ,the dusks grow vast in a purple haze1 ,while the ,west from a rapture of sunset rights1 ,faint stars their exquisite lamps upraise-- ,midsummer nights6 ,o ,midsummer nights6 99 99 99 99 99 ,the wood's green heart is a nest of dreams1 ,the lush grass thickens and springs and sways1 ,the rathe wheat rustles1 the landscape gleams-- ,midsummer days6 ,midsummer days6 ,in the stilly fields1 in the stilly way1 ,all secret shadows and mystic lights1 ,late lovers1 murmurous1 linger and gaze-- ,midsummer nights6 ,o ,midsummer nights6 99 99 99 99 99 ,there's a swagger of bells from the trampling teams1 ,wild skylarks hover1 the gorses blaze1 ,the rich ripe rose as with incense steams-- ,midsummer days6 ,midsummer days6 ,a soul from the honeysuckle strays1 ,and the nightingale1 as from prophet heights1 ,speaks to the ,earth of her million ,mays-- ,midsummer nights6 ,o ,midsummer nights6 ,and it's oh for my ,dear and the charm that stays-- ,midsummer days6 ,midsummer days6 ,and it's oh for my ,love and the dark that plights-- ,midsummer nights6 ,o ,midsummer nights6 ,there is a burst for you6 ,and we will let the poets of spring1 with their lambkins and their catkins and the rest1 match this poem of ,william ,henley's if they can4 ,the royal months are ours1 and we love the reign of the rose4 ,when the burnished tints of bronze shine on the brackens1 and the night-wind blows with a chilly moan from the fields of darkness1 we shall have precious days to remember1 and1 ah1 when the nights are long1 and the churlish ,winter lays his fell finger on stream and grass and tree1 we shall be haunted by jolly memories6 ,will the memories be wholly pleasant8 ,perchance1 when the curtains are drawn and the lamp burns softly1 we may read of bright and beautiful things4 ,out of doors the war of the winter fills the roaring darkness4 ,it may be that ,hoarsely across the iron ground ,the icy wind goes roaring past1 ,the powdery wreaths go whirling round ,dancing a measure to the blast4 ,the hideous sky droops darkly down ,in brooding swathes of misty gloom1 ,and seems to wrap the fated town ,in shadows of remorseless doom4 ,then some of us may find a magic phrase of ,keats's1 or ,thomas ,hardy's1 or ,black's1 or ,dickens's1 that recalls the lovely past from the dead4 ,many times ,i have had that experience4 ,once1 after spending the long and glorious summer amid the weird subdued beauty of a wide heath1 ,i returned to the great city4 ,it had been a pleasant sojourn1 though ,i had had no company save a collie and one or two terriers4 ,at evening the dogs liked their ramble1 and we all loved to stay out until the pouring light of the moon shone on billowy mists and heath-clad knolls4 ,the faint rustling of the heath grew to a wide murmur1 the little bells seemed to chime with notes heard only by the innermost spirit1 and the gliding dogs were like strange creatures from some shadowy underworld4 ,at times a pheasant would rise and whirl like a rocket from hillock to hollow1 and about midnight a rapturous concert began4 ,on one line of trees a colony of nightingales had established themselves near the heart of the waste4 ,first came the low inquiry from the leader2 then two or three low twittering answers2 then the one long note that lays hold of the nerves and makes the whole being quiver2 and then--ah1 the passion1 the pain1 the unutterable delight of the heavenly jargoning when the whole of the little choir begin their magnificent rivalry6 ,the thought of death is gone1 the wild and poignant issues of life are softened1 and the pulses beat thickly amid the blinding sweetness of the music4 ,he who has not heard the nightingale has not lived4 ,far off the sea called low through the mist1 and the long path of the moon ran toward the bright horizon2 the ships stole in shadow and shine over the glossy ripples1 and swung away to north and south till they faded in wreaths of delicate darkness4 ,dominating the whole scene of beauty1 there was the vast and subtle mystery of the heath that awed the soul even when the rapture was at its keenest4 ,time passed away1 and on one savage night ,i read ,thomas ,hardy's unparalleled description of the majestic waste in ,the ,return of the ,native4 ,that superb piece of ,english is above praise--indeed praise1 as applied to it1 is half an impertinence2 it is great as ,shakespeare1 great almost as ,nature--one of the finest poems in our language4 ,as ,i read with awe the quiet inevitable sentences1 the vision of my own heath rose1 and the memory filled me with a sudden joy4 ,i know that the hour of darkness ever dogs our delight1 and the shadow of approaching darkness and toil might affront me even now1 if ,i were ungrateful2 but ,i live for the present only4 ,let grave persons talk about the grand achievements and discoveries that have made this age or that age illustrious2 ,i hold that holidays are the noblest invention of the human mind1 and1 if any philosopher wants to argue the matter1 ,i flee from his presence1 and luxuriate on the yellow sands or amid the keen kisses of the salty waves4 ,i own that ,newton's discoveries were meritorious1 and ,i willingly applaud ,mr4 ,george ,stephenson1 through whose ingenuity we are now whisked to our places of rest with the swiftness of an eagle's flight4 ,nevertheless ,i contend that holidays are the crowning device of modern thought1 and ,i hold that no thesis can be so easily proven as mine4 ,how did our grandfathers take holiday8 ,alas1 the luxury was reserved for the great lords who scoured over the ,continent1 and for the pursy cits who crawled down to ,brighthelmstone6 ,the ordinary ,londoner was obliged to endure agonies on board a stuffy ,margate hoy1 while the people in ,northern towns never thought of taking a holiday at all4 ,the marvellous cures wrought by ,doctor ,ozone were not then known1 and the science of holiday-making was in its infancy4 ,the wisdom of our ancestors was decidedly at fault in this matter1 and the gout and dyspepsia from which they suffered served them right4 ,read volumes of old memoirs1 and you will find that our forefathers1 who are supposed to have been so merry and healthy1 suffered from all the ills which grumblers ascribe to struggling civilization4 ,they did not know how to extract pleasure from their midsummer days and midsummer nights2 we do1 and we are all the better for the grand modern discovery4 ,seriously1 it is a good thing that we have learned the value of leisure1 and1 for my own part1 ,i regard the rushing yearly exodus from ,london1 ,liverpool1 ,birmingham1 with serene satisfaction4 ,it is a pity that so many ,english folk persist in leaving their own most lovely land when our scenery and climate are at their best4 ,in too many cases they wear themselves with miserable and harassing journeys when they might be placidly rejoicing in the sweet midsummer days at home4 ,snarling aesthetes may say what they choose1 but ,england is not half explored yet1 and anybody who takes the trouble may find out languorous nooks where life seems always dreamy1 and where the tired nerves and brain are unhurt by a single disturbing influence4 ,there are tiny villages dotted here and there on the coast where the flaunting tourist never intrudes1 and where the ,british cad cares not to show his unlovable face4 ,still1 if people like the stuffy ,continental hotel and the unspeakable devices of the wily ,swiss1 they must take their choice4 ,i prefer beloved ,england2 but ,i wish all joy to those who go far afield4 ,june1 #ahhf4 ,,dandies4 ,perhaps there is no individual of all our race who is quite insensible to the pleasures of what children call dressing-up4 ,even the cynic1 the man who defiantly wears old and queer clothes1 is merely suffering from a perversion of that animal instinct which causes the peacock to swagger in the sun and flaunt the splendour of his train1 the instinct that makes the tiger-moth show the magnificence of his damask wing1 and also makes the lion erect the horrors of his cloudy mane and paw proudly before his tawny mate4 ,we are all alike in essentials1 and ,diogenes with his dirty clouts was only a perverted brother of ,prince ,florizel with his peach-coloured coat and snowy ruffles4 ,i intend to handle the subject of dandies and their nature from a deeply philosophic starting-point1 for1 like ,carlyle1 ,i recognize the vast significance of the questions involved in the philosophy of clothes4 ,let no flippant individual venture on a jeer1 for ,i am in dead earnest4 ,a mocking critic may point to the ,bond ,street lounger and ask1 ,what are the net use and purport of that being's existence8 ,look at his suffering frame6 ,his linen stock almost decapitates him1 his boots appear to hail from the chambers of the ,inquisition1 every garment tends to confine his muscles and dwarf his bodily powers2 yet he chooses to smile in his torments and pretends to luxuriate in life4 ,again1 what are the net use and purport of his existence8 ,i can only deprecate our critic's wrath by going gravely to first principles4 ,o savage and critical one1 that suffering youth of ,bond ,street is but exhibiting in flaunting action a law that has influenced the breed of men since our forefathers dwelt in caves or trees6 ,observe the conduct of the innocent and primitive beings who dwell in sunny archipelagos far away to the ,south2 they suffer in the cause of fashion as the youth of the city promenade suffers4 ,the chief longing of the judicious savage is to shave1 but the paucity of metals and sharp instruments prevents him from indulging his longing very frequently4 ,when the joyous chance does come1 the son of the forest promptly rises to the occasion4 ,no elderly gentleman whose feet are studded with corns could bear the agony of patent leather boots in a heated ballroom with grander stoicism than that exhibited by our savage when he compasses the means of indulging in a thorough uncompromising shave4 ,the elderly man of the ballroom sees the rosy-fingered dawn touching the sky into golden fretwork2 he thinks of his cool white bed1 and then1 by contrast1 he thinks of his hot throbbing feet4 ,shooting fires dart through his unhappy extremities1 yet he smiles on and bears his pain for his daughters' sake4 ,but the elderly hero cannot be compared with the ambitious exquisite of the ,southern ,seas1 and we shall prove this hypothesis4 ,the careless voyager throws a beer-bottle overboard1 and that bottle drifts to the glad shore of a glittering isle2 the overjoyed savage bounds on the prize1 and proceeds to announce his good fortune to his bosom friend4 ,then the pleased cronies decide that they will have a good1 wholesome1 thorough shave1 and they will turn all rivals green with unavailing envy4 ,solemnly those children of nature go to a quiet place1 and savage number one lies down while his friend sits on his head2 then with a shred of the broken bottle the operator proceeds to rasp away4 ,it is a great and grave function1 and no savage worthy the name of warrior would fulfil it in a slovenly way4 ,when the last scrape is given1 and the stubbly irregular crop of bristles stands up from a field of gore1 then the operating brave lies down1 and his scarified friend sits on his head4 ,these sweet and satisfying idyllic scenes are enacted whenever a bottle comes ashore1 and the broken pieces of the receptacles that lately held foaming ,bass or glistening ,hochheimer are used until their edge gives way1 to the great contentment of true untutored dandies4 ,the ,bond ,street man is at one end of the scale1 the uncompromising heathen barber at the other2 but the same principles actuate both4 ,the ,maori is even more courageous in his attempts to secure a true decorative exterior1 for he carves the surface of his manly frame into deep meandering channels until he resembles a walking advertisement of crochet-patterns for ladies4 ,dire is his suffering1 long is the time of healing2 but1 when he can appear among his friends with a staring blue serpent coiled round his body from the neck to the ankle1 when the rude figure of the bounding wallaby ornaments his noble chest1 he feels that all his pain was worth enduring and that life is indeed worth living4 ,the primitive dandy of ,central ,africa submits himself to the magician of the tribe1 and has his front teeth knocked out with joy2 the ,ashantee or the ,masai has his teeth filed to sharp points--and each painful process enables the victim to pose as a leader of fashion in the tribe4 ,as the race rises higher1 the refinements of dandyism become more and more complex1 but the ruling motive remains the same1 and the ,macaroni1 the ,corinthian1 the ,incroyable1 the swell1 the dude--nay1 even the common toff--are all mysteriously stirred by the same instinct which prompts the festive ,papuan to bore holes in his innocent nose4 ,who then shall sneer at the dandy8 ,does he not fulfil a law of our nature8 ,let us rather regard him with toleration1 or even with some slight modicum of reverence4 ,solemn historians affect to smile at the gaudy knights of the second ,richard's ,court1 who wore the points of their shoes tied round their waists2 they even ridicule the tight1 choking1 padded coats worn by ,george ,,iv41 that pattern father of his people2 but ,i see in the stumbling courtier and the half-asphyxiated wearer of the padded ,petersham coat two beings who act under the demands of inexorable law4 ,our great modern sage brooded in loneliness for some six years over the moving problem of dandyism1 and we have the results of his meditations in ,sartor ,resartus4 ,we have an uneasy sense that he may be making fun of us--in fact1 we are almost sure that he is2 for1 if you look at his summary of the doctrines put forth in ,pelham1 you can hardly fail to detect a kind of sub-acid sneer4 ,instead of being impressed by the dainty musings of the learned ,bulwer1 that grim vulturine sage chose to curl his fierce lips and turn the whole thing to a laughing-stock4 ,we must at once get to that summary of what the great ,thomas calls ,dandiacal doctrine1 and then just thinkers may draw their own conclusions4 ,articles of ,faith4--#a4 ,coats should have nothing of the triangle about them2 at the same time wrinkles behind should be carefully avoided4 #b4 ,the collar is a very important point2 it should be low behind1 and slightly rolled4 #c4 ,no license of fashion can allow a man of delicate taste to adopt the posterial luxuriance of a ,hottentot4 #d4 ,there is safety in a swallowtail4 #e4 ,the good sense of a gentleman is nowhere more finely developed than in his rings4 #f4 ,it is permitted to mankind1 under certain restrictions1 to wear white waistcoats4 #g4 ,the trousers must be exceedingly tight across the hips4 ,then the sage observes1 ,all which propositions ,i for the present content myself with modestly1 but peremptorily and irrevocably1 denying4 ,wicked ,scotchman1 rugged chip of the ,hartz rock1 your seven articles of the ,whole ,duty of the ,dandy are evidently solemn fooling6 ,you despised ,lytton in your heart1 and you thought that because you wore a ragged duffel coat in gay ,hyde ,park you had a right to despise the human ephemera who appeared in inspiriting splendour4 ,i have often laughed at your solemn enumeration of childish maxims1 but ,i am not quite sure that you were altogether right in sneering4 ,so far for the heroic vein4 ,the ,clothes ,philosopher whose huge burst of literary horse-laughter was levelled at the dandy does not always confine himself to indirect scoffing2 here is a plain statement--,first1 touching dandies1 let us consider with some scientific strictness what a dandy specially is4 ,a dandy is a clothes-wearing man1 a man whose trade office1 and existence consist in the wearing of clothes4 ,every faculty of his soul1 spirit1 purse1 and person is heroically consecrated to this one object--the wearing of clothes wisely and well2 so that1 as others dress to live1 he lives to dress4 ,the all-importance of clothes has sprung upon the intellect of the dandy without effort1 like an instinct of genius2 he is inspired with cloth--a poet of cloth4 ,like a generous creative enthusiast1 he fearlessly makes his idea an action--shows himself in peculiar guise to mankind1 walks forth a witness and living martyr to the eternal worth of clothes4 ,we called him a poet2 is not his body the 7stuffed7 parchment-skin whereon he writes1 with cunning ,huddersfield dyes1 a sonnet to his mistress's eyebrow8 ,this is very witty and very trenchant in allusion1 but ,i am obliged to say seriously that ,carlyle by no means reached the root of the matter4 ,the mere tailor's dummy is deplorable1 despicable1 detestable1 but a real man is none the worse if he gives way to the imperious human desire for adornment1 and some of the men who have made permanent marks on the world's face have been of the tribe whom our ,scotchman satirised4 ,i have known sensible young men turned into perfectly objectionable slovens by reading ,carlyle2 they thought they rendered a tribute to their master's genius by making themselves look disreputable1 and they found allies to applaud them4 ,one youth of a poetic turn saw that the sage let his hair fall over his forehead in a tangled mass4 ,now this young man had very nice wavy hair1 which naturally fell back in a sweep1 but he devoted himself with an industry worthy of a much better cause to the task of making his hair fall in unkempt style over his brow4 ,when he succeeded1 he looked partly like a ,shetland pony1 partly like a street-arab2 but his own impression was that his wild and ferocious appearance acted as a living rebuke to young men of weaker natures4 ,if ,i had to express a blunt opinion1 ,i should say he was a dreadful simpleton4 ,every man likes to be attractive in some way in the springtime and hey-day of life2 when the blood flushes the veins gaily and the brain is sensitive to joy1 then a man glories in looking well4 ,why blame him8 ,the young officer likes to show himself with his troop in gay trappings2 the athlete likes to wear garments that set off his frame to advantage2 and it is good that this desire for distinction exists1 else we should have but a grey and sorry world to live in4 ,when the pulses beat quietly and life moves on the downward slope1 a man relies on more sober attractions1 and he ceases to care for that physical adornment which every young and healthy living creature on earth appreciates4 ,so long as our young men are genuinely manly1 good1 strong1 and courageous1 ,i am not inclined to find fault with them1 even if they happen to trip and fall into slight extravagances in the matter of costume4 ,the creature who lives to dress ,i abhor1 the sane and sound man who fulfils his life-duties gallantly and who is not above pleasing himself and others by means of reasonable adornments ,i like and even respect warmly4 ,the philosophers may growl as they chose1 but ,i contend that the sight of a superb young ,englishman with his clean clear face1 his springy limbs1 his faultless habiliments is about as pleasant as anything can be to a discerning man4 ,moreover1 it is by no means true that the dandy is necessarily incompetent when he comes to engage in the severe work of life4 ,our hero1 our ,nelson1 kept his nautical dandyism until he was middle-aged4 ,who ever accused him of incompetence8 ,think of his going at ,trafalgar into that pouring ,inferno of lead and iron with all his decorations blazing on him6 ,in honour ,i won them and in honour ,i will wear them1 said this unconscionable dandy2 and he did wear them until he had broken our terrible enemy's power1 saved ,london from sack1 and worse1 and yielded up his gallant soul to his ,maker4 ,rather an impressive kind of dandy was that wizened little animal4 ,there'll be wigs on the green1 boys--the dandies are coming6 ,so ,marlborough's soldiers used to cry when the regiment of exquisites charged4 ,at home the fierce ,englishmen strutted around in their merry haunts and showed off their brave finery as though their one task in life were to wear gaudy garments gracefully2 but1 when the trumpet rang for the charge1 the silken dandies showed that they had the stuff of men in them4 ,the philosopher is a trifle too apt to say1 ,anybody who does not choose to do as ,i like is1 on the face of it1 an inferior member of the human race4 ,i utterly refuse to have any such doctrine thrust down my throat4 ,no sage would venture to declare that the handsome1 gorgeous ,john ,churchill was a fool or a failure4 ,he beat ,england's enemies1 he made no blunder in his life1 and he survived the most vile calumnies that ever assailed a struggling man2 yet1 if he was not a dandy1 then ,i never saw or heard of one4 ,all our fine fellows who stray with the ,british flag over the whole earth belong more or less distinctly to the dandy division4 ,the velvet glove conceals the iron hand2 the pleasing modulated voice can rise at short notice to tones of command2 the apparent languor will on occasion start with electric suddenness into martial vigour4 ,the lounging dandies who were in ,india when the red storm of the ,mutiny burst from a clear sky suddenly became heroes who toiled1 fought1 lavished their strength and their blood1 performed glorious prodigies of unselfish action1 and snatched an empire from the fires of ruin4 ,even if a young fellow cannot afford fine clothes1 he can be neat1 and ,i always welcome the slightest sign of fastidiousness1 because it indicates self-respect4 ,the awful beings who wear felt hats swung on one side1 glaring ties1 obtrusive checks1 and carry vulgar little sticks1 are so abhorrent that ,i should journey a dozen miles to escape meeting one of them4 ,the cheap1 nasty1 gaudy garments are an index to a vast vulgarity of mind and soul2 the cheap swell is a sham1 and1 as a sham1 he is immoral and repulsive4 ,but the modest youth need not copy the wild unrestraint of the gentleman known as ',arry2 he can contrive to make himself attractive without sullying his appearance by a trace of cheap and nasty adornment1 and every attempt which he makes to look seemly and pleasing tends subtly to raise his own character4 ,once or twice ,i have said that you cannot really love any one wholly unless you can sometimes laugh at him4 ,now ,i cannot laugh at the invertebrate haunter of flashy bars and theatre-stalls1 because he has not the lovable element in him which invites kindly laughter2 but ,i do smile--not unadmiringly--at our dandy1 and forgive him his little eccentricities because ,i know that what the ,americans term the hard pan of his nature is sound4 ,it is all very well for unhandsome philosophers in duffel to snarl at our butterfly youth4 ,the dry dull person who devours blue-books and figures may mock at their fribbles2 but persons who are tolerant take large and gentle views1 and they indulge the dandy1 and let him strut for his day unmolested1 until the pressing hints given by the years cause him to modify his splendours and sink into unassuming sobriety of demeanour and raiment4 ,june1 #ahhh4 ,,genius ,,and ,,respectability4 ,a very lengthy biography of ,percy ,bysshe ,shelley appeared recently1 and the biographer thought it his duty to give the most minute and peculiar details concerning the poet's private life4 ,in consequence1 the book is a deplorable one in many respects1 and no plain-minded person can read it without feeling sorry that our sweet singer should be presented to us in the guise of a weak-minded hypocrite4 ,one critic wrote a great many pages in which he bemoans the dreary and sordid family-life of the man who wrote the ,ode to the ,west ,wind4 ,i can hardly help sympathizing with the critic1 for indeed ,shelley's proceedings rather test the patience of ordinary mortals1 who do not think that poetic--or rather artistic--ability licenses its possessor to behave like a scoundrel4 ,shelley wrote the most lovely verse in praise of purity2 but he tempted a poor child to marry him1 deserted her1 insulted her1 and finally left her to drown herself when brutal neglect and injury had driven her crazy4 ,poor ,harriet ,westbrook6 ,she did not behave very discreetly after her precious husband left her2 but she was young1 and thrown on a hard world without any strength but her own to protect her4 ,while she was drifting into misery the airy poet was talking sentiment and ventilating his theories of the universe to ,mary ,godwin4 ,harriet was too shallow for the rhymester1 and the penalty she paid for her shallowness was to be deceived1 enticed into a rash marriage1 brutally insulted1 and left to fare as well as she might in a world that is bitterly cruel to helpless girls4 ,the maker of rhymes goes off gaily to the ,continent to enjoy himself heartily and write bewitching poems2 ,harriet stays at home and lives as best she can on her pittance until the time comes for her despairing plunge into the ,serpentine4 ,it is true that the poet invited the poor creature to come and stay with him2 but what a piece of unparalleled insolence toward a wronged lady6 ,the admirers of the rhymer say1 ,ah1 but ,harriet's society was not congenial to the poet4 ,congenial6 ,how many brave men make their bargain in youth and stand to it gallantly unto the end8 ,a simple soul of this sort thinks to himself1 ,well1 ,i find that my wife and ,i are not in sympathy2 but perhaps ,i may be in fault4 ,at any rate1 she has trusted her life to me1 and ,i must try to make her days as happy as possible4 ,it seems that supreme poets are to be exempt from all laws of manliness and honour1 and a simple woman who cannot babble to them about their ideals and so forth is to be pitched aside like a soiled glove6 ,honest men who cannot jingle words are content with faith and honour and rectitude1 but the poet is to be applauded if he behaves like a base fellow on finding that some unhappy loving creature cannot talk in his particular fashion4 ,we may all be very low ,philistines if we are not prepared to accept rhymers for chartered villains2 but some of us still have a glimmering of belief in the old standards of nobility and constancy4 ,can any one fancy ,walter ,scott cheating a miserable little girl of sixteen into marriage1 and then leaving her1 only to many a female philosopher8 ,how that noble soul would have spurned the maundering sentimentalist who talked of truth and beauty1 and music and moonlight and feeling1 and behaved as a mean and bad man6 ,scott is more to my fancy than is ,shelley4 ,again1 this poet1 this exquisite weaver of verbal harmonies1 is represented to us by his worshippers as having a passion for truth2 whereas it happens that he was one of the most remarkable fibbers that ever lived4 ,he would come home with amazing tales about assassins who had waylaid him1 and try to give himself importance by such blustering inventions4 ,imagination6 says the enthusiast2 but among commonplace persons another word is used4 ,your lordship knows what kleptomania is8 said a counsel who was defending a thief4 ,justice ,byles replied1 ,oh1 yes6 ,i come here to cure it4 ,some critical justice might say the same of ,shelley's imagination4 ,we are also told that ,shelley's excessive nobility of nature prevented him from agreeing with his commonplace father2 and truly the poet was a bad and an ungrateful son4 ,but1 if a pretty verse-maker is privileged to be an undutiful son1 what becomes of all our old notions8 ,i think once more of the great ,sir ,walter1 and ,i remember his unquestioning obedience to his parents4 ,then we may also remember ,gibbon1 who was quite as able and useful a man as ,shelley4 ,the historian loved a young ,french lady1 but his father refused consent to their marriage1 and ,gibbon quietly obeyed and accepted his hard fate4 ,the passion sanctified his whole life1 and1 as he says1 made him more dear to himself2 he settled his colossal work1 and remained unmarried for life4 ,he may have been foolish3 but ,i prefer his behaviour to that of a man who treats his father with contumely and ingratitude even while he is living upon him4 ,we hear much of ,shelley's unselfishness1 but it does not appear that he ever denied himself the indulgence of a whim4 ,the ,ode to the ,west ,wind1 the ,ode ,written in ,dejection near ,naples1 and ,the ,skylark are unsurpassed and unsurpassable2 but ,i can hardly pardon a man for cruelty and turpitude merely because he produces a few masterpieces of art4 ,a confident and serene critic attacks ,mr4 ,arnold very severely because the latter writer thinks that poets should be amenable to fair and honest social laws4 ,if ,i understand the critic aright1 we must all be so thankful for beautiful literary works that we must be ready to let the producers of such works play any pranks they please under high heaven4 ,they are the children of genius1 and we are to spoil them2 ,childe ,harold and ,manfred are such wondrous productions that we need never think of the author's orgies at ,venice and the ,abbey2 ,epipsychidion is lovely1 so we should not think of poor ,harriet ,westbrook casting herself into the ,serpentine4 ,this is marvellous doctrine1 and one hardly knows whither it might lead us if we carried it into thorough practice4 ,suppose that1 in addition to indulging the spoiled children of genius1 we were to approve all the proceedings of the clever children in any household4 ,i fancy that the dwellers therein would have an unpleasant time4 ,noble charity towards human weakness is one thing2 but blind adulation of clever and immoral men is another4 ,we have great need to pity the poor souls who are the prey of their passions1 but we need not worship them4 ,a large and lofty charity will forgive the shortcomings of ,robert ,burns2 we may even love that wild and misguided but essentially noble man4 ,that is well2 yet we must not put ,burns forward and offer our adulation in such a way as to set him up for a model to young men4 ,a man may read-- ,the pale moon is setting beyont the white wave1 ,and ,time is setting with me1 oh6 ,the pathos will wring his heart2 but he should not ask any youth to imitate the conduct of the great poet4 ,carlyle said very profoundly that new morality must be made before we can judge ,mirabeau2 but ,carlyle never put his hero's excesses in the foreground of his history1 nor did he try to apologize for them2 he only said1 ,here is a man whose stormy passions overcame him and drove him down the steep to ruin6 ,think of him at his best1 pardon him1 and imitate1 in your weak human fashion1 the infinite ,divine ,mercy4 ,that is good2 and it is certainly very different from the behaviour of writers who ask us to regard their heroes' evil-doing as not only pardonable1 but as being almost admirable4 ,this ,shelley controversy raises several weighty issues4 ,we forgive ,burns because he again and again offers us examples of splendid self-sacrifice in the course of his broken life1 and we are able to do so because the balance is greatly on the good side2 but we do not refrain from saying1 ,in some respects ,burns was a scamp4 ,the fact is that the claims of weak-headed adorers who worship men of genius would lead to endless mischief if they were allowed4 ,men who were skilled in poetry and music and art have often behaved like scoundrels2 but their scoundrelism should be reprobated1 and not excused4 ,and my reason for this contention is very simple--once allow that a man of genius may override all salutary conventions1 and the same conventions will be overridden by vain and foolish mediocrities4 ,take1 for example1 the conventions which guide us in the matter of dress4 ,most people grant that in many respects our modern dress is ugly in shape1 ugly in material1 and calculated to promote ill-health4 ,the hard hat which makes the brow ache must affect the wearer's health1 and therefore1 when we see the greatest living poet going about in a comfortable soft felt1 we call him a sensible man4 ,carlyle used to hobble about with soft shoes and soft slouch-hat1 and he was right ,but it is possible to be as comfortable as ,lord ,tennyson or ,carlyle without flying very outrageously in the face of modern conventions2 and many everyday folk contrive to keep their bodies at ease without trying any fool's device4 ,charles ,kingsley used to roam about in his guernsey--most comfortable of all dresses--when he was in the country2 but when he visited the town he managed to dress easily and elegantly in the style of an average gentleman4 ,but some foolish creatures say in their hearts1 ,men of genius wear strange clothing--,tennyson wears a vast ,inverness cape1 ,carlyle wore a duffel jacket1 ,bismarck wears a flat white cap1 ,mortimer ,collins wore a big ,panama2 artists in general like velvet and neckties of various gaudy hues4 ,let us adopt something startling in the way of costume1 and we may be taken for men of genius4 ,thus it happened that very lately ,london was invested by a set of simpletons of small ability in art and letters2 they let their hair grow down their backs2 they drove about in the guise of ,venetian senators of the fifteenth century2 they appeared in slashed doublets and slouched hats2 and one of them astonished the public--and the cabmen--by marching down a fashionable thoroughfare on a broiling day with a fur ulster on his back and a huge flower in his hand4 ,observe my point--these social nuisances obtained for themselves a certain contemptible notoriety by caricaturing the ways of able men4 ,i can forgive young ,disraeli's gaudy waistcoats and pink-lined coats1 but ,i have no patience with his silly imitators4 ,this is why ,i object to the praise which is bestowed on men of genius for qualities which do not deserve praise4 ,the reckless literary admirer of ,shelley or ,byron goes into ecstasies and cries1 ,perish the slave who would think of these great men's vices6--whereupon raw and conceited youngsters say1 ,vice and eccentricity are signs of genius4 ,we will be vicious and eccentric2 and then they go and convert themselves into public nuisances4 ,that vice and folly are not always associated with genius scarcely needs demonstrating4 ,i allow that many great men have been sensual fools1 but we can by no means allow that folly and sensuality are inseparable from greatness4 ,my point is to prove that littleness must be conquered before a man can be great or good4 ,macaulay lived a life of perfect and exemplary purity2 he was good in all the relations of life2 those nearest to him loved him most dearly1 and his days were passed in thinking of the happiness of others4 ,perhaps he was vain--certainly he had something to be vain of--but1 though he had such masterful talent1 he never thought himself licensed1 and he wore the white flower of a blameless life until his happy spirit passed easily away4 ,wordsworth was a poet who will be placed on a level with ,byron when an estimate of our century's great men comes to be made4 ,but ,wordsworth lived his sweet and pious life without in any way offending against the moral law4 ,we must have done with all talk about the privileges of irregular genius2 a clever man must be made to see that1 while he may be as independent as he likes1 he cannot be left free to offend either the sense or the sensibility of his neighbours4 ,the genius must learn to conduct himself in accordance with rational and seemly custom1 or he must be brought to his senses4 ,when a great man's ways are merely innocently different from those of ordinary people1 by all means let him alone4 ,for instance1 ,leonardo da ,vinci used often to buy caged wild-birds from their captors and let them go free4 ,what a lovely and lovable action6 ,he hurt no one2 he restored the joy of life to innocent creatures1 and no one could find fault with his sweet fancy4 ,in the same way1 when ,samuel ,johnson chose to stalk ponderously along the streets1 stepping on the edges of the paving-stones1 or even when he happened to roar a little loudly in conversation1 who could censure him seriously8 ,his heart was as a little child's3 his deeds were saintly2 and we perhaps love him all the more for his droll little ways4 ,but1 when ,shelley outrages decency and the healthy sense of manliness by his peculiar escapades1 it is not easy to pardon him2 the image of that drowned child rises before us1 and we are apt to forget the pretty verses4 ,calm folk remember that many peculiarly wicked and selfish gentry have been able to make nice rhymes and paint charming pictures4 ,the old poet ,francois ,villon1 who has made men weep and sympathize for so many years1 was a burglar1 a murderer1 and something baser1 if possible1 than either murderer or burglar4 ,a more despicable being probably never existed2 and yet he warbles with angelic sweetness1 and his piercing sadness thrills us after the lapse of four centuries4 ,young men of unrestrained appetites and negative morality are often able to talk most charmingly1 but the meanest and most unworthy persons whom ,i have met have been the wild and lofty-minded poets who perpetually express contempt of ,philistines and cast the shaft of their scorn at what they call dross4 ,so far as money goes1 ,i fancy that the oratorical1 and grandiose poet is often the most greedy of individuals2 and1 when1 in his infinite conceit1 he sets himself up above common decency and morality1 ,i find it difficult to confine myself to moderate language4 ,a man of genius may very well be chaste1 modest1 unselfish1 and retiring4 ,byron was at his worst when he was producing the works which made him immortal2 ,i prefer to think of him as he was when he cast his baser self away1 and nobly took up the cause of ,greece4 ,when once his matchless common sense asserted itself1 and he ceased to contemplate his own woes and his own wrongs1 he became a far greater man than he had ever been before4 ,i should be delighted to know that the cant about the lowering restrictions imposed by stupidity on genius had been silenced for ever4 ,a man of transcendent ability must never forget that he is a member of a community1 and that he has no more right wantonly to offend the feelings or prejudices of that community than he has to go about buffeting individual members with a club4 ,as soon as he offends the common feelings of his fellows he must take the consequences2 and hard-headed persons should turn a deaf ear when any eloquent and sentimental person chooses to whine about his hero's wrongs4 ,march1 #ahhh4 ,,slang4 ,has any one ever yet considered the spiritual significance of slang8 ,the dictionaries inform us that slang is a conversational irregularity of a more or less vulgar type2 but that is not all4 ,the prim definition refers merely to words1 but ,i am rather more interested in considering the mental attitude which is indicated by the distortion and loose employment of words1 and by the fresh coinages which seem to spring up every hour4 ,i know of no age or nation that has been without its slang1 and the study is amongst the most curious that a scholar can take up2 but our own age1 after all1 must be reckoned as the palmy time of slang1 for we have gone beyond mere words1 and our vulgarizations of language are significant of degradation of soul4 ,the ,romans of the decadence had a hideous cant language which fairly matched the grossness of the people1 and the ,gauls1 with their descendants1 fairly matched the old conquerors4 ,the frightful old ,paris of ,francois ,villon1 with all its bleak show of famine and death1 had its constant changes of slang4 ,tousjours vieil synge est desplaisant1 says the burglar-poet1 and he means that the old buffoon is tiresome2 the young man with the newest phases of city slang at his tongue's end is most acceptable in merry company4 ,very few people can read ,villon's longer poems at all1 for they are almost entirely written in cant language1 and the glossary must be in constant requisition4 ,the rascal is a really great writer in his abominable way1 but his dialect was that of the lowest resorts1 and he lets us see that the copious argot which now puzzles the stranger by its kaleidoscopic changes was just as vivid and changeable in the miserable days of the eleventh ,louis4 ,in the ,paris of our day the slang varies from hour to hour2 every one seems able to follow it1 and no one knows who invents the constant new changes4 ,the slang of the boarding-house in ,balzac's ,pere ,goriot is quite different from that of the novels done by the ,goncourt brothers2 and1 though ,i have not yet mustered courage to finish one of ,m4 ,zola's outrages1 ,i can see that the vulgarisms which he has learned are not at all like any that have been used in bygone days4 ,the corruption of ,paris seems to breed verbal distortions rather freely1 and the ordinary babble of the city workman is as hard to any ,englishman as are the colloquialisms of ,burns to the average ,cockney4 ,in ,england our slang has undergone one transformation after another ever since the time of ,chaucer4 ,shakespeare certainly gives us plenty2 then we have the slang of the ,great ,war1 and then the unutterable horrors of the ,restoration--even the highly proper ,mr4 ,joseph ,addison does not disdain to talk of an old put1 and his wags are given to smoking strangers4 ,the eighteenth century--the century of the gallows--gave us a whole crop of queer terms which were first used in thieves' cellars1 and gradually filtered from the racecourse and the cockpit till they took their place in the vulgar tongue4 ,the sweet idyll of ,life in ,london is a perfect garden of slang2 ,tom the ,corinthian and ,bob ,logic lard their phrases with the idiom of the prize-ring1 and the author obligingly italicises the knowing words so that one has no chance of missing them4 ,but nowadays we have passed beyond all that1 and every social clique1 every school of art and literature1 every trade--nay1 almost every religion--has its peculiar slang2 and the results as regards morals1 manners1 and even conduct in general are too remarkable to be passed over by any one who desires to understand the complex society of our era4 ,the mere patter of thieves or racing-men--the terms are nearly synonymous--counts for nothing4 ,those who know the byways of life know that there are two kinds of dark language used by our nomad classes and by our human predatory animals4 ,a ,london thief can talk a dialect which no outsider can possibly understand2 for1 by common agreement1 arbitrary names are applied to every object which the robbers at any time handle1 and to every sort of underhand business which they transact4 ,but this gibberish is not exactly an outcome of any moral obliquity2 it is employed as a means of securing safety4 ,the gipsy cant is the remnant of a pure and ancient language2 we all occasionally use terms taken from this remarkable tongue1 and1 when we speak of a cad1 or making a mull1 or bosh1 or shindy1 or cadger or bamboozling1 or mug1 or duffer1 or tool1 or queer1 or maunder1 or loafer1 or bung1 we are using pure gipsy4 ,no distinct mental process1 no process of corruption1 is made manifest by the use of these terms2 we simply have picked them up unconsciously1 and we continue to utter them in the course of familiar conversation4 ,i am concerned with a degradation of language which is of an importance far beyond the trifling corruption caused by the introduction of terms from the gipsy's caravan1 the betting ring1 or the thieves' kitchen2 one cannot help being made angry and sad by observing a tendency to belittle all things that are great1 to mock all earnestness1 to vulgarize all beauty4 ,there is not a quarter where the subtle taint has not crept in1 and under its malign influence poetry has all but expired1 good conversation has utterly ceased to exist1 art is no longer serious1 and the intercourse of men is not straightforward4 ,the ,englishman will always be emotional in spite of the rigid reserve which he imposes upon himself2 he is an enthusiast1 and he does truly love earnestness1 veracity1 and healthy vigour4 ,take him away from a corrupt and petty society and give him free scope1 and he at once lets fall the film of shams from off him like a cast garment1 and comes out as a reality4 ,shut the same ,englishman up in an artificial1 frivolous1 unreal society1 and he at once becomes afraid of himself2 he fears to exhibit enthusiasm about anything1 and he hides his genuine nature behind a cloud of slang4 ,he belittles everything he touches1 he is afraid to utter a word from his inner heart1 and his talk becomes a mere dropping shower of verbal counters which ring hollow4 ,the superlative degree is abhorrent to him unless he can misuse it for comic purposes2 and1 like the ridiculous dummy lord in ,nicholas ,nickleby1 he is quite capable of calling ,shakespeare a very clayver man4 ,i have heard of the attitude taken by two flowers of our society in presence of ,joachim4 ,think of it6 ,the unmatched violinist had achieved one of those triumphs which seem to permeate the innermost being of a worthy listener2 the soul is entranced1 and the magician takes us into a fair world where there is nothing but loveliness and exalted feeling4 ,vewy good fellow1 that fiddle fellow1 observed the ,british aristocrat4 ,ya-as1 answered his faithful friend4 ,let any man who is given to speaking words with a view of presenting the truth begin to speak in our faint1 super-refined1 orthodox society2 he will be looked at as if he were some queer object brought from a museum of curiosities and pulled out for exhibition4 ,the shallowest and most impudent being that ever talked fooleries will assume superior airs and treat the man of intellect as an amusing but inferior creature4 ,more than that--earnestness and reality are classed together under the head of bad form1 the vital word grates on the emasculate brain of the society man1 and he compensates himself for his inward consciousness of inferiority by assuming easy airs of insolence4 ,a very brilliant man was once talking in a company which included several of the superfine division2 he was witty1 vivid1 genial1 full of knowledge and tact2 but he had one dreadful habit--he always said what he thought4 ,the brilliant man left the company1 and one sham-languid person said to a sham-aristocratic person1 ,who is that8 ,ah1 he's a species of over-educated savage6 ,now the gentleman who propounded this pleasant piece of criticism was1 according to trustworthy history1 the meanest1 most useless1 and most despicable man of his set2 yet he could venture to assume haughty airs towards a man whose shoes he was not fit to black1 and he could assume those airs on the strength of his slangy impassivity--his good form4 ,when we remember that this same fictitious indifference characterized the typical grand seigneur of old ,france1 and when we also remember that indifference may be rapidly transformed into insolence1 and insolence into cruelty1 we may well look grave at the symptoms which we can watch around us4 ,the dreary ennui of the heart1 ennui that revolts at truth1 that is nauseated by earnestness1 expresses itself in what we call slang1 and slang is the sign of mental disease4 ,i have no fault to find with the broad1 racy1 slap-dash language of the ,american frontier1 with its picturesque perversions and its droll exaggeration4 ,the inspired person who chose to call a coffin an eternity box and whisky blue ruin was too innocent to sneer4 ,the slang of ,mark ,twain's ,mr4 ,scott when he goes to make arrangements for the funeral of the lamented ,buck ,fanshawe is excruciatingly funny and totally inoffensive4 ,then the story of ,jim ,baker and the jays in ,a ,tramp ,abroad is told almost entirely in frontier slang1 yet it is one of the most exquisite1 tender1 lovable pieces of work ever set down in our tongue4 ,the grace and fun of the story1 the odd effects produced by bad grammar1 the gentle humour1 all combine to make this decidedly slangy chapter a literary masterpiece4 ,a miner or rancheman will talk to you for an hour and delight you1 because his slang somehow fits his peculiar thought accurately2 an ,english sailor will tell a story1 and he will use one slang word in every three that come out of his mouth1 yet he is delightful1 for the simple reason that his distorted dialect enables him to express and not to suppress truth4 ,but the poison that has crept through the minds of our finer folk paralyses their utterance so far as truth is concerned2 and society may be fairly caricatured by a figure of the ,father of ,lies blinking through an immense eyeglass upon ,god's universe4 ,mr4 ,george ,meredith1 with his usual magic insight1 saw long ago whither our over-refined gentry were tending2 and in one of his finest books he shows how a little dexterous slang may dwarf a noble deed4 ,nevil ,beauchamp was under a tremendous fire with his men3 he wanted to carry a wounded soldier out of action1 but the soldier wished his adored officer to be saved4 ,at the finish the two men arrived safely in their own lines amid the cheers of ,english1 ,french1 and even of the ,russian enemy4 ,this is how the votary of slang transfigures the episode2 he wishes to make a little fun out of the hero1 and he manages it by employing the tongue which it is good form to use4 ,a long-shanked trooper bearing the name of ,john ,thomas ,drew was crawling along under fire of the batteries4 ,out pops old ,nevil1 tries to get the man on his back4 ,it won't do4 ,nevil insists that it's exactly one of the cases that ought to be1 and they remain arguing about it like a pair of nine-pins while the ,moscovites are at work with the bowls4 ,very well4 ,let me tell you my story4 ,it's perfectly true1 ,i give you my word4 ,so ,nevil tries to horse ,drew1 and ,drew proposes to horse ,nevil1 as at school4 ,then ,drew offers a compromise4 ,he would much rather have crawled on1 you know1 and allowed the shot to pass over his head2 but he's a ,briton--old ,nevil's the same2 but old ,nevil's peculiarity is that1 as you are aware1 he hates a compromise--won't have it--retro ,sathanas6--and ,drew's proposal to take his arm instead of being carried pick-a-or piggy-back--,i am ignorant how ,nevil spells it--disgusts old ,nevil4 ,still it won't do to stop where they are1 like the cocoanut and pincushion of our friends the gipsies on the downs2 so they take arms and commence the journey home1 resembling the best friends on the evening of a holiday in our native clime--two steps to the right1 half a dozen to the left1 c4 ,they were knocked down by the wind of a ball near the battery4 ',confound it6' cries ,nevil4 ',it's because ,i consented to a compromise6' ,most people know that this passage refers to ,rear-,admiral ,maxse1 yet1 well as we may know our man1 we have him presented like an awkward1 silly1 comic puppet from a show4 ,the professor of slang could degrade the conduct of the soldiers on board the ,birkenhead2 he could make the choruses from ,samson ,agonistes seem like the ,cockney puerilities of a comic news-sheet4 ,it is this high-sniffing1 supercilious slang that ,i attack1 for ,i can see that it is the impudent language of a people to whom nothing is great1 nothing beautiful1 nothing pure1 and nothing worthy of faith4 ,the slang of the ,london season is terrible and painful4 ,a gloriously beautiful lady is a rather good-looking woman--looks fairly well to-night2 a great entertainment is a function2 a splendid ball is a nice little dance2 high-bred1 refined1 and exclusive ladies and gentlemen are smart people2 a tasteful dress is a swagger frock2 a new craze is the swagger thing to do4 ,imbecile1 useless1 contemptible beings1 male and female1 use all these verbal monstrosities under the impression that they make themselves look distinguished4 ,a microcephalous youth whose chief intellectual relaxation consists in sucking the head of a stick thinks that his conversational style is brilliant when he calls a man a ,johnnie1 a battle a blooming slog1 his lodgings his show1 a hero a game sort of a chappie1 and so on4 ,girls catch the infection of slang2 and thus1 while sweet young ladies are leading beautiful lives at ,girton and ,newnham1 their sisters of society are learning to use a language which is a frail copy of the robust language of the drinking-bar and the racecourse4 ,under this blight lofty thought perishes1 noble language also dies away1 real wit is cankered and withered into a mere ghastly crackle of wordplay1 humour is regarded as the sign of the savage1 and generous emotion1 manly love1 womanly tenderness are reckoned as the folly of people whom the smart young lady of the period would describe as ,jugginses4 ,as to the slang of the juniors of the middle class1 it is well-nigh past description and past bearing4 ,the dog-collared1 tight-coated1 horsey youth learns all the cant phrases from cheap sporting prints1 and he has an idea that to call a man a bally bounder is quite a ducal thing to do4 ,his hideous cackle sounds in railway-carriages1 or on breezy piers by the pure sea1 or in suburban roads4 ,from the time when he gabbles over his game of ,nap in the train until his last villainous howl pollutes the night1 he lives1 moves1 and has his being in slang2 and he is incapable of understanding truth1 beauty1 grandeur1 or refinement4 ,he is apt to label any one who does not wear a dog-collar and stableman's trousers as a cad2 but1 ah1 what a cad he himself is6 ,in what a vast profound gulf of vulgarity his being wallows2 and his tongue1 his slang1 is enough to make the spirits of the pure and just return to earth and smite him6 ,better by far the cunning gipsy with his glib chatter1 the rough tramp with his incoherent hoarseness6 ,all who wish to save our grand language from deterioration1 all who wish to retain some savour of sincerity and manhood among us1 should set themselves resolutely to talk on all occasions1 great or trivial1 in simple1 direct1 refined ,english4 ,there is no need to be bookish2 there is much need for being natural and sincere--and nature and sincerity are assassinated by slang4 ,september1 #ahhh4 ,,pets4 ,that enterprising savage who first domesticated the pig has a good deal to answer for4 ,i do not say that the moral training of the pig was a distinct evil1 for it undoubtedly saved many aged and respectable persons from serious inconvenience4 ,the more practical members of the primitive tribes were wont to club the patriarchs whom they regarded as having lived long enough2 and an exaggerated spirit of economy led the sons of the forest to eat their venerable relatives4 ,the domestication of the noble animal which is the symbol of ,irish prosperity caused a remarkable change in primitive public opinion4 ,the gratified savage1 conscious of possessing pigs1 no longer cast the anxious eye of the epicure upon his grandmother4 ,thus a disagreeable habit and a disagreeable tradition were abolished1 and one more step was made in the direction of universal kindliness4 ,but1 while we are in some measure grateful to the first pig-tamer1 we do not feel quite so sure about the first person who inveigled the cat into captivity4 ,mark that ,i do not speak of the slavery of the cat--for who ever knew a cat to do anything against its will8 ,if you whistle for a dog1 he comes with servile gestures1 and almost overdoes his obedience2 but1 if a cat has got into a comfortable place1 you may whistle for that cat until you are spent1 and it will go on regarding you with a lordly blink of independence4 ,no2 decidedly the cat is not a slave4 ,of course ,i must be logical1 and therefore ,i allow1 under reasonable reservations1 that a boot-jack1 used as a projectile1 will make a cat stir2 and ,i have known a large garden-syringe cause a most picturesque exodus in the case of some eloquent and thoughtful cats that were holding a conference in a garden at midnight4 ,still ,i must carefully point out the fact that the boot-jack will not induce the cat to travel in any given direction for your convenience2 you throw the missile1 and you must wait in suspense until you know whether your cat will vanish with a wild plunge through the roof of your conservatory or bound with unwonted smartness into your favourite ,william pear tree4 ,the syringe is scarcely more trustworthy in its action than the boot-jack2 the parting remarks of six drenched cats are spirited and harmonious2 but the animals depart to different quarters of the universe1 and your hydraulic measure1 so far from bringing order out of chaos1 merely evokes a wailing chaos out of comparative order4 ,these discursive observations aim at showing that a cat has a haughty spirit of independence which centuries of partial submission to the suzerainty of man have not eradicated4 ,i do not want to censure the ancient personage who made friends with the creature which is a thing of beauty and a joy for ever to many estimable people--,i reserve my judgment4 ,some otherwise calm and moral men regard the cat in such a light that they would go and jump on the tomb of the primeval tamer2 others would erect monuments to him2 so perhaps it is better that we do not know whose memory we should revere--or anathematise--the processes are reversible1 according to our dispositions4 ,man is the paragon of animals2 the cat is the paradox of animals4 ,you cannot reason about the creature2 you can only make sure that it has every quality likely to secure success in the struggle for existence2 and it is well to be careful how you state your opinions in promiscuous company1 for the fanatic cat-lover is only a little less wildly ferocious than the fanatical cat-hater4 ,cats and pigs appear to have been the first creatures to earn the protective affection of man2 but1 ah1 what a cohort of brutes and birds have followed6 ,the dog is an excellent1 noble1 lovable animal2 but the pet-dog6 ,alas6 ,i seem to hear one vast sigh of genuine anguish as this ,essay travels round the earth from ,china to ,peru4 ,i can understand the artfulness of that wily savage who first persuaded the wolf-like animal of the ,asiatic plains to help him in the chase2 ,i understand the statesmanship of the ,thibetan shepherd who first made a wolf turn traitor to the lupine race4 ,but who first invented the pet-dog8 ,this impassioned question ,i ask with thoughts that are a very great deal too deep for tears4 ,consider what the existence of the pet-dog means4 ,you visit an estimable lady1 and you are greeted1 almost in the hall1 by a poodle1 who waltzes around your legs and makes an oration like an obstructionist when the ,irish ,estimates are before the ,house4 ,you feel that you are pale1 but you summon up all your reserves of base hypocrisy and remark1 ,poor fellow6 ,poo-poo-poo-ole fellow6 ,you really mean1 ,i should like to tomahawk you1 and scalp you afterwards6--but this sentiment you ignobly retain in your own bosom4 ,you lift one leg in an apologetic way1 and poodle instantly dashes at you with all the vehemence of a charge of his compatriots the ,cuirassiers4 ,you shut your eyes and wait for the shedding of blood2 but the torturer has all the malignant subtlety of an ,apache ,indian1 and he tantalizes you4 ,presently the lady of the house appears1 and1 finding that you are beleaguered by an ubiquitous foe1 she says sweetly1 ,pray do not mind ,moumou2 his fun gets the better of him4 ,go away1 naughty ,moumou6 ,did ,mr4 ,blank frighten him then--the darling8 ,fun6 ,a pleasing sort of fun6 ,if the rescuer had seen that dog's sanguinary rushes1 she would not talk about fun4 ,when you reach the drawing-room1 there is a pug seated on an ottoman4 ,he looks like a peculiarly truculent bull-dog that has been brought up on a lowering diet of gin-and-water1 and you gain an exaggerated idea of his savagery as he uplifts his sooty muzzle4 ,he barks with indignation1 as if he thought you had come for his mistress's will1 and intended to cut him off with a ,spratt's biscuit4 ,of course he comes to smell round your ankles1 and equally of course you put on a sickly smile1 and take up an attitude as though you had sat down on the wrong side of a harrow4 ,your conversation is strained and feeble2 you fail to demonstrate your affection2 and1 when a fussy ,king ,charles comes up and fairly shrieks injurious remarks at you1 the sense of humiliation and desertion is too severe1 and you depart4 ,of course your hostess never attempts to control her satellites--they are quiet with her2 and1 even if one of them sampled the leg of a guest with a view to further business1 she would be secretly pleased at such a proof of exclusive affection4 ,we suppose that people must have something to be fond of2 but why should any one be fond of a pug that is too unwieldy to move faster than a hedgehog8 ,his face is1 to say the least1 not celestial--whatever his nose may be2 he cannot catch a rat2 he cannot swim2 he cannot retrieve2 he can do nothing1 and his insolence to strangers eclipses the best performances of the finest and tallest ,belgravian flunkeys4 ,he is alive1 and in his youth he may doubtless have been comic and engaging2 but in his obese1 waddling1 ill-conditioned old age he is such an atrocity that one wishes a wandering ,chinaman might pick him up and use him instantly after the sensible thrifty fashion of the great nation4 ,i love the ,st4 ,bernard2 he is a noble creature1 and his beautiful life-saving instinct is such that ,i have seen a huge member of the breed jump off a high bridge to save a puppy which he considered to be drowning4 ,the ,st4 ,bernard will allow a little child to lead him and to smite him on the nose without his uttering so much as a whine by way of remonstrance4 ,if another dog attacks him1 he will not retaliate by biting--that would be undignified1 and like a mere bull-dog2 he lies down on his antagonist and waits a little2 then that other dog gets up when it has recovered breath1 and1 after thinking the matter over1 it concludes that it must have attacked a sort of hairy traction-engine4 ,all these traits of the ,st4 ,bernard are very sweet and engaging1 and ,i must1 moreover1 congratulate him on his scientific method of treating burglars2 but ,i do object with all the pathos at my disposal to the ,st4 ,bernard considered as a pet4 ,his master will bring him into rooms4 ,now1 when he is bounding about on glaciers1 or infringing the ,licensing ,act by giving travellers brandy without scrutinizing their return-tickets1 or acting as pony for frozen little boys1 or doing duty as special constable when burglars pay an evening call1 he is admirable2 but1 when he enters a room1 he has all the general effects of an earthquake without any picturesque accessories4 ,his beauty is of course praised1 and1 like any other big lumbering male1 he is flattered2 his vast tail makes a sweep like the blade of a screw-propeller1 and away goes a vase4 ,a maid brings in tea1 and the ,st4 ,bernard is pleased to approve the expression of ,mary's countenance2 with one colossal spring he places his paws on her shoulders1 and she has visions of immediate execution4 ,not being equal to the part of an early martyr1 she observes1 ,ow6 ,the ,st4 ,bernard regards this brief statement as a compliment1 and1 in an ecstasy of self-approval1 he sends poor ,mary staggering4 ,of course1 when he is sent out1 after causing this little excitement1 he proceeds to eat anything that happens to be handy2 and1 as the cook does not wish to be eaten herself1 she bears her bitter wrong in silence1 only hoping that the two pounds of butter which the animal took as dessert may make him excessively unwell4 ,now ,i ask any man and brother1 or lady and sister1 is a ,st4 ,bernard a legitimate pet in the proper sense of the word8 ,as to the bull-dog1 ,i say little4 ,he at least is a good water-dog1 and1 when he is taught1 he will retrieve birds through the heaviest sea as long as his master cares to shoot4 ,but his appearance is sardonic1 to say the least of it2 he puts me in mind of a prize-fighter coming up for the tenth round when he has got matters all his own way4 ,happily he is not often kept as a pet2 he is usually taken out by fast young men in riverside places1 for his company is believed to give an air of dash and fashion to his master2 and he waddles along apparently engaged in thinking out some scheme of reform for sporting circles in general4 ,in a drawing-room he looks unnatural1 and his imperturbable good humour fails to secure him favour4 ,dr4 ,jessopp tells a story of a clergyman's wife who usually kept from fifteen to twenty brindled bull-dogs2 but this lady was an original character1 and her mode of using a red-hot iron bar when any of her pets had an argument was marked by punctuality and despatch4 ,the genuine collie is an ideal pet1 but the cross-grained fleecy brutes bred for the show-bench are good neither for one thing nor another4 ,the real1 homely1 ugly collie never snaps at friends2 the mongrel brute with the cross of ,gordon setter is not safe for an hour at a time4 ,the real collie takes to sheep-driving by instinct2 he will run three miles out and three miles in1 and secure his master's property accurately after very little teaching2 the present champion of all the collies would run away from a sheep as if he had seen a troop of lions4 ,in any case1 even when a collie is a genuine affectionate pet1 his place is not in the house4 ,let him have all the open air possible1 and he will remain healthy1 delightful in his manners1 and preternaturally intelligent4 ,the dog of the day is the fox-terrier1 and a charming little fellow he is4 ,unfortunately it happens that most smart youths who possess fox-terriers have an exalted idea of their friends' pugilistic powers1 and hence the sweet little black1 white1 and tan beauty too often has life concerted into a battle and a march4 ,still no one who understands the fox-terrier can help respecting and admiring him4 ,if ,i might hint a fault1 it is that the fox-terrier lacks balance of character4 ,the ejaculation ,cats6 causes him to behave in a way which is devoid of well-bred repose1 and his conduct when in presence of rabbits is enough to make a meditative lurcher or retriever grieve4 ,when a lurcher sees a rabbit in the daytime1 he leers at him from his villainous oblique eye1 and seems to say1 ,shan't follow you just now--may have the pleasure of looking you up this evening4 ,but the fox-terrier converts himself into a kind of hurricane in fur1 and he gives tongue like a stump-orator in full cry4 ,i may say that1 when once the fox-terrier becomes a drawing-room pet1 he loses all character--he might just as well be a pug at once4 ,the ,bedlington is perhaps the best of all terriers1 but his disreputable aspect renders him rather out of place in a refined room4 ,it is only when his deep sagacious eyes are seen that he looks attractive4 ,he can run1 swim1 dive1 catch rabbits1 retrieve1 or do anything4 ,i grieve to say that he is a dog of an intriguing disposition2 and no prudent lady would introduce him among dogs who have not learned mischief4 ,the ,bedlington seems to have the power of command1 and he takes a fiendish delight in ordering young dogs to play pranks4 ,he will whisper to a young collie1 and in an instant you will see that collie chasing sheep or hens1 or hunting among flower-beds1 or baiting a cow1 or something equally outrageous4 ,decidedly the ,bedlington does not shine as a pet2 and he should be kept only where there are plenty of things to be murdered daily--then he lives with placid joy1 varied by sublime ,berserker rage4 ,as to feathered pets1 who has not suffered from parrots8 ,you buy a grey one at the docks1 and pay four pounds for him on account of his manifold accomplishments4 ,when he is taken home and presented to a prim lady1 he of course gives her samples of the language used by the sailors on the voyage home2 and1 even when his morals are cured and his language is purified by discipline1 he is a terrible creature4 ,the imp lurks in his eye1 and his beak--his abominable beak--is like a malicious vice4 ,but ,i allow that ,polly1 when well behaved1 gives a charming appearance to a room1 and her ways are very quaint4 ,lonely women have amused themselves for many and many a weary hour with the antics of the pretty tropical bird2 and ,i shall say nothing against ,poll for the world4 ,i started with the intention of merely skirting the subject2 but ,i find ,i am involved in considerations deep as society--deep as the origins of the human race4 ,in their proper place ,i like all pets1 with the exception of snakes4 ,the aggressive pug is bad enough1 but the snake is a thousand times worse4 ,when possible1 all boys and girls should have pets1 and they should be made to tend their charges without any adult help whatever4 ,no indirect discipline has such a humanizing effect4 ,the unregenerate boy deprived of pets will tie kettles to dogs' tails1 he will shoot at cats with catapults1 he is merciless to small birds1 and no one can convince him that frogs or young nestlings can feel4 ,when he has pets1 his mental horizon is widened and his kindlier instincts awaken4 ,a boy or girl without a pet is maimed in sympathy4 ,let me plead for discrimination in choice of pets4 ,a gentleman--like the celebrated ,mary--had a little lamb which he loved2 but the little lamb developed into a very big and vicious ram which the owner could not find heart to kill4 ,when this gentleman's friends were holding sweet and improving converse with him1 that sheep would draw up behind his master's companion2 then he would shoot out like a stone from a sling1 and you would see a disconcerted guest propelled through space in a manner destructive alike to dignity and trousers4 ,that sheep comes and butts at the front-door if he thinks his master is making too long a call2 it is of no use to go and apologize for he will not take any denial1 and1 moreover1 he will as soon ram you with his granite skull as look at you4 ,let the door be shut again1 and the sheep seems to say1 ,if ,i don't send a panel in1 you may call me a low1 common goat6 and then he butts away with an enthusiasm which arouses the street4 ,a pet of that sort is quite embarrassing1 and ,i must respectfully beg leave to draw the line at rams4 ,a ram is too exciting a personage for the owner's friends4 ,every sign that tells of the growing love for dumb animals is grateful to my mind2 for any one who has a true1 kindly love for pets cannot be wholly bad4 ,while ,i gently ridicule the people who keep useless brutes to annoy their neighbours1 ,i would rather see even the hideous1 useless pug kept to wheeze and snarl in his old age than see no pets at all4 ,good luck to all good folk who love animals1 and may the reign of kindness spread6 ,march1 #ahhh4 ,,the ,,ethics ,,of ,,the ,,turf4 ,when ,lord ,beaconsfield called the ,turf a vast engine of national demoralization1 he uttered a broad general truth2 but1 unfortunately1 he did not go into particulars1 and his vague grandiloquence has inspired a large number of ferocious imitators1 who know as little about the essentials of the matter as ,lord ,beaconsfield did4 ,these imitators abuse the wrong things and the wrong people2 they mix up causes and effects2 they are acrid where they should be tolerant2 they know nothing about the real evils2 and they do no good1 for the simple reason that racing blackguards never read anything1 while cultured gentlemen who happen to go racing smile quietly at the blundering of amateur moralists4 ,sir ,wilfrid ,lawson is a good man and a clever man2 but to see the kind of display he makes when he gets up to talk about the ,turf is very saddening4 ,he can give you an accurate statement concerning the evils of drink1 but as soon as he touches racing his innocence becomes woefully apparent1 and the biggest scoundrel that ever entered the ,ring can afford to make game of the harmless1 well-meaning critic4 ,the subject is an intricate one1 and you cannot settle it right off by talking of pampered nobles who pander to the worst vices of the multitude2 and you go equally wrong if you begin to shriek whenever that inevitable larcenous shopboy whimpers in the dock about the temptations of betting4 ,we are poisoned by generalities2 our reformers1 who use press and platform to enlighten us1 resemble a doctor who should stop by a patient's bedside and deliver an oration on bad health in the abstract when he ought to be finding out his man's particular ailment4 ,let us clear the ground a little bit1 until we can see something definite4 ,i am going to talk plainly about things that ,i know1 and ,i want to put all sentimental rubbish out of the road4 ,in the first place1 then1 horse-racing1 in itself1 is neither degrading nor anything else that is bad2 a race is a beautiful and exhilarating spectacle1 and quiet men1 who never bet1 are taken out of themselves in a delightful fashion when the exquisite thoroughbreds thunder past4 ,no sensible man supposes for a moment that owners and trainers have any deliberate intention of improving the breed of horses1 but1 nevertheless1 these splendid tests of speed and endurance undoubtedly tend indirectly to produce a fine breed1 and that is worth taking into account4 ,the ,survival of the ,fittest is the law that governs racing studs2 the thought and observation of clever men are constantly exercised with a view to preserving excellence and eliminating defects1 so that1 little by little1 we have contrived1 in the course of a century1 to approach equine perfection4 ,if a twelve-stone man were put up on ,bendigo1 that magnificent animal could give half a mile start to any ,arab steed that ever was foaled1 and run away from the ,arab at the finish of a four-mile course4 ,weight need not be considered1 for if the ,eastern-bred horse only carried a postage-stamp the result would be much about the same4 ,minting could carry fourteen stone across a country1 while1 if we come to mere speed1 there is really no knowing what horses like ,ormonde1 ,energy1 ,prince ,charlie1 and others might have done had they been pressed4 ,if the ,emir of ,hal were to bring over fifty of his best mares1 the ,newmarket trainers could pick out fifty fillies from among their second-rate animals1 and the worst of the fillies could distance the best of the ,arabs on any terms2 while1 if fifty heats were run off1 over any courses from half a mile to four miles1 the ,english horses would not lose one4 ,the champion ,arab of the world was matched against one of the worst thoroughbreds in training2 the ,english plater carried about five stone more than the pride of the ,east1 and won by a quarter of a mile4 ,unconsciously1 the breeders of racers have been evolving for us the swiftest1 strongest1 and most courageous horse known to the world1 and we cannot afford to neglect that consideration1 for people will not strive after perfection unless perfection brings profit4 ,again1 we hear occasionally a good deal of outcry about the great noblemen and gentlemen who keep up expensive studs1 and the assumption is that racehorses and immorality go together2 but what would the critics have the racing nobleman do8 ,he is born into a strange artificial society2 his fate is ready-made for him2 he inherits luxuries and pastimes as he inherits land and trees4 ,say that the stud is a useless luxury3 but then1 what about the daubs for which plutocrats pay thousands of guineas8 ,a picture costs1 let us say1 #b1jjj guineas2 it is the slovenly work of a hurried master1 and the guineas are paid for a name2 it is stuck away in a private gallery1 and1 if its owner looks at it so often as once a week1 it costs him #b per peep--reckoning only the interest on the money sunk4 ,is that useless luxury8 ,the fact is that we are living in a sort of guarded hothouse2 our barbarian propensities cannot have an easy outlet2 and luxury of all sorts tends to lull our barbarian energy4 ,if we blame one man for indulging a costly hobby1 we must blame almost every man and woman who belongs to the grades above the lower middle-class4 ,a rich trader who spends #e1jjj a year on orchid-houses cannot very well afford to reprove a man who pays #ejs4 per week for each of a dozen horses in training4 ,rich folk1 whose wealth has been fostered during the long security of ,england1 will indulge in superfluities1 and no one can stop them4 ,a country gentleman who succeeds to a deer park cannot slaughter all the useless1 pretty creatures merely because they are useless3 he is bound by a thousand traditions1 and he cannot suddenly break away4 ,a nobleman inherits a colossal income1 of which he cannot very well rid himself3 he follows the traditions of his family or his class1 and employs part of his profuse surplus riches in maintaining a racing stud2 how can any one find fault with him8 ,such a man as ,lord ,hartington would never dream of betting except in a languid1 off-hand way4 ,he 7and his like7 are fond of watching the superb rush of the glossy horses2 they want the freedom1 the swift excitement of the breezy heath2 our society encourages them to amuse themselves1 and they do so with a will4 ,that is all4 ,it may be wrong for ,a and ,b and ,c to own superfluous wealth1 but then the fact is there--that they have got it1 and the community agree that they may expend the superfluity as they choose4 ,the rich man's stud gives wholesome employment to myriads of decent folks in various stations of life--farmers1 saddlers1 blacksmiths1 builders1 corn dealers1 road-makers1 hedgers1 farriers1 grooms1 and half a score other sorts of toilers derive their living from feeding1 harnessing1 and tending the horses1 and the withdrawal of such a sportsman as ,mr4 ,abington from ,newmarket would inflict a terrible blow on hundreds of industrious persons who lead perfectly useful and harmless lives4 ,my point is1 that racing 7as racing7 is in no way noxious2 it is the most pleasant of all excitements1 and it gives bread to many praiseworthy citizens4 ,i have seen #e1jjj given for a ,latin hymn-book1 and1 when ,i pondered on the ghastly1 imbecile selfishness of that purchase1 ,i thought that ,i should not have mourned very much if the money had been laid out on a dozen smart colts and fillies1 for1 at least1 the horses would have ultimately been of some use1 even if they all had been put to cab-work4 ,we must allow that when racing is a hobby1 it is quite respectable--as hobbies go4 ,one good friend of mine1 whose fortune has been made by shrewd judgment and constant work1 always keeps five or six racers in training4 ,he goes from meeting to meeting with all the eagerness of a boy2 his friends sturdily maintain that his stud is composed of hair trunks1 and the animals certainly have an impressively uniform habit of coming in last ,but the good owner has his pleasure2 his hobby satisfies him2 and1 when he goes out in the morning to watch his yearlings frolicking1 he certainly never dreams that he is fostering an immoral institution4 ,could we only have racing--and none of the hideous adjuncts--,i should be glad1 in spite of all the moralists who associate horse-flesh with original sin4 ,as to the bookmakers1 ,i shall have much to say further on4 ,at present ,i am content with observing that the quiet1 respectable bookmaker is as honourable and trustworthy as any trafficker in stocks and shares1 and his business is almost identical with that of the stockjobber in many respects4 ,no class of men adhere more rigidly to the point of honour than bookmakers of the better sort1 and a mere nod from one of them is as binding to him as the most elaborate of parchments4 ,they are simply shrewd1 audacious tradesmen1 who know that most people are fools1 and make their profit out of that knowledge4 ,it is painful to hear an ignorant man abusing a bookmaker who does no more than use his opportunities skilfully4 ,why not abuse the gentry who buy copper to catch the rise of the market8 ,why not abuse the whole of the thousands of men who make the ,city lively for six days of the week8 ,is there any rational man breathing who would scruple to accept profit from the rise of a stock or share8 ,if ,i1 practically1 back ,south-,eastern ,railway shares to rise1 who blames me if ,i sell when my property has increased in value by one-eighth8 ,my good counsellor1 ,mr4 ,ruskin1 who is the most virulent enemy of usury1 is nevertheless very glad that his father bought ,bank of ,england shares1 which have now been converted into ,stock1 and stand at over #cjj2 ,ruskin senior was a shrewd speculator1 who backed his fancy2 and a bookmaker does the same in a safer way4 ,bookmaking is a business which is carried out in its higher branches with perfect sobriety1 discretion1 mid probity2 the gambling element does not come in on the bookmaker's side1 but he deals with gamblers in a fair way4 ,they know that he will lay them the shortest odds he can2 they know that they put their wits against his1 and they also know that he will pay them with punctilious accuracy if they happen to beat him in the encounter of brains4 ,three or four of the leading betting men turn over on the average about half a million each per annum2 one firm who bet on commission receive an average of five thousand pounds per day to invest1 and the vouchers of all these speculators and agents are as good as bank notes4 ,mark that ,i grant the certainty of the bookmakers winning2 they can remain idle in their mansions for months in the year1 and the great gambling public supply the means2 but ,i do not find fault with the bookmakers because they use their opportunities1 or else ,i might rave about the iniquity of a godly man who earns in a week #ajj1jjj from a corner in tin1 or ,i might reprobate the quack who makes no less than #gjjj per cent on every box of pills that he sells4 ,a good man once chatted with me for a whole evening1 and all his talk ran on his own luck in spotting shares that were likely to move upward4 ,certainly his luck as a gambler had been phenomenal4 ,i turned the conversation to the ,turf case of ,wood v4 ,cox1 and the torrent of eloquence which met me was enough to drown my intellect in its whirl and rush4 ,my friend was great on the iniquity of gaming and racing1 and ,i rather fancy that he proposed to play on the ,betting ,ring with a mitrailleuse if ever he had the power4 ,i know he was most sanguinary--and ,i smiled4 ,he never for an instant seemed to think that he was exactly like a backer of horses1 and ,i have no doubt but that his density is shared by a few odd millions here and there4 ,the stockbroker is a kind of bookmaker1 and the men and women who patronise both and make their wealth are fools who all may be lumped under the same heading4 ,i knew of one outside-broker--a mere bucket-shop keeper--who keeps #fjj clerks constantly employed4 ,that seems to point out rather an extensive gambling business4 ,and now ,i have tried to clear the ground on one hand a little1 and my last and uttermost good word has been said for the ,turf4 ,with sorrow ,i say that1 after all excuses are made1 the cool observer must own that it is indeed a vast engine of national demoralization1 and the subtle venom which it injects into the veins of the ,nation creeps along through channels of which ,lord ,beaconsfield never dreamed4 ,i might call the ,turf a canker1 but a canker is only a local ailment1 whereas the evils of betting have now become constitutional so far as the ,state is concerned4 ,if we cut out the whole tribe of bookmakers and betting-agents1 and applied such cautery as would prevent any similar growth from arising in the place wherefrom we excised them1 we should do very little good2 for the life-blood of ,britain is tainted1 and no superficial remedy can cure her now4 ,i shut my eyes on the bookmakers1 and ,i only spare attention for the myriads who make the bookmakers' existence possible--who would evolve new bookmakers from their midst if we exterminated the present tribe to-morrow4 ,it is not the professional bettors who cause the existence of fools2 it is the insensate fools who cause the existence of professional bettors4 ,gambling used to be mainly confined to the upper classes2 it is now a raging disease among that lower middle-class which used to form the main element of our national strength1 and the tradesman whose cart comes to your area in the morning gambles with all the reckless abandonment that used to be shown by the ,hon4 ,a4 ,deuceace or ,lady ,betty when ,george the ,third was ,king4 ,your clerk1 shopman1 butcher1 baker1 barber--especially the barber--ask their companions1 ,what have you done on the ,lincoln8 or ,how do you stand for the ,two ,thousand8 just as ordinary folks ask after each other's health4 ,tradesmen step out of their shops in the morning and telegraph to their bookmaker just as they might to one of their wholesale houses2 there is not a town in broad ,england which has not its flourishing betting men1 and some very small towns can maintain two or three4 ,the bookmakers are usually publicans1 barbers1 or tobacconists2 but whatever they are they invariably drive a capital trade4 ,in the corner of a smoking-room you may see a quiet1 impassive man sitting daily in a contemplative manner2 he does not drink much2 he smokes little1 and he appears to have nothing in particular to worry him4 ,if he knows you well1 he will scarcely mind your presence2 men 7and boys7 greet him1 and little1 gentle colloquies take place from time to time2 the smartest man could detect nothing1 and yet the noiseless1 placid gentleman of the smoking-room registers thirty or forty bets in a day4 ,that is one type which ,i have watched for hours1 days1 months4 ,there are dozens of other types1 but ,i need not attempt to sketch them2 it is sufficient to say that the poison has taken hard hold on us1 and that ,i see every symptom of a national decadence4 ,some one may say1 ,but you excused the ,turf and the betting men4 ,exactly4 ,i said that racing is a delightful pastime to those who go to watch good horses gallop2 the miserable thing to me is seeing the wretches who do not care for racing at all1 but only care for gambling on names and numbers4 ,let ,lord ,hartington1 ,lord ,randolph ,churchill1 ,mr4 ,chaplin1 ,mr4 ,corlett1 ,mr4 ,rothschild1 ,lord ,rosebery1 and the rest1 go and see the lovely horses shooting over the turf2 by all means let them watch their own colts and fillies come flying home4 ,but the poor creatures who muddle away brains1 energy1 and money on what they are pleased to term sport1 do not know a horse from a mule2 they gamble1 as ,i have said1 on names2 the splendid racers give them no enjoyment such as the true sportsman derives1 for they would not know ,ormonde from a ,clydesdale4 ,to these forlorn beings only the ignoble side of racing is known2 it is sacrilege to call them sportsmen2 they are rotting their very souls and destroying the remnants of their manhood over a game which they play blindfold4 ,it is pitiful--most pitiful4 ,no good-natured man will begrudge occasional holiday-makers their chance of seeing a good race4 ,rural and industrial ,yorkshire are represented by thousands at ,doncaster1 on the ,st4 ,ledger day1 and the tourists get no particular harm2 they are horsey to the backbone1 and they come to see the running4 ,they criticize the animals and gain topics for months of conversation1 and1 if they bet an odd half-crown and never go beyond it1 perhaps no one is much the worse4 ,when the ,duke of ,portland allowed his tenantry to see ,st4 ,simon gallop five years ago at ,newcastle1 the pitmen and artisans thronged to look at the horse4 ,there was no betting whatever1 because no conceivable odds could have measured the difference between ,st4 ,simon and his opponent1 yet when ,archer let the multitude see how fast a horse could travel1 and the great thoroughbred swept along like a flash1 the excitement and enthusiasm rose to fever-pitch4 ,those men had an unaffected pleasure in observing the beauty and symmetry and speed of a noble creature1 and they were unharmed by the little treat which the good-natured magnate provided for them4 ,it is quite otherwise with the mob of stay-at-home gamblers2 they do not care a rush for the horses2 they long1 with all the crazy greed of true dupes1 to gain money without working for it1 and that is where the mischief comes in4 ,cupidity1 mean anxieties1 unwholesome excitements1 gradually sap the morality of really sturdy fellows--the last shred of manliness is torn away1 and the ordinary human intelligence is replaced by repulsive vulpine cunning4 ,if you can look at a little group of the stay-at-homes while they are discussing the prospects of a race1 you will see something that ,hogarth would have enjoyed in his large1 lusty fashion4 ,the fair human soul no longer shines through those shifty1 deceitful eyes2 the men have1 somehow1 sunk from the level of their race1 and they make you think that ,swift may-have been right after all4 ,from long experience ,i am certain that if a cultured gentleman1 accustomed to high thinking1 were suddenly compelled to live among these dismal beings1 he would be attacked by a species of intellectual paralysis4 ,the affairs of the country are nothing to them2 poetry1 art1 and all beautiful things are contemptible in their eyes2 they dwell in an obscure twilight of the mind1 and their relaxation1 when the serious business of betting is put aside for awhile1 mostly lies in the direction of sheer bawdry and abomination4 ,it is curious to see the oblique effect which general degradation has upon the vocabulary of these people2 quiet words1 or words that express a plain meaning1 are repugnant to them2 even the old-fashioned full-mouthed oaths of our fathers are tame to their fancy1 for they must have something strongly spiced1 and thus they have by degrees fitted themselves up with a loathly dialect of their own which transcends the comparatively harmless efforts of the ,black ,country potter4 ,foul is not the word for this ultra-filthy mode of talk--it passes into depths below foulness4 ,i may digress for a little to emphasize this point4 ,the latter-day hanger-on of the ,turf has introduced a new horror to existence4 ,go into the ,silver ,ring at a suburban meeting1 and listen while two or three of the fellows work themselves into an ecstasy of vile excitement1 then you will hear something which cannot be described or defined in any terms known to humanity4 ,why it should be so ,i cannot tell1 but the portentous symptom of putridity is always in evidence4 ,as is the man of the ,ring1 so are the stay-at-homes4 ,the disease of their minds is made manifest by their manner of speech2 they throw out verbal pustules which tell of the rank corruption which has overtaken their nature1 and you need some seasoning before you can remain coolly among them without feeling symptoms of nausea4 ,there is one peer of this realm--a hereditary legislator and a patron of many ,church livings--who is famous for his skill in the use of certain kinds of vocables4 ,this man is a living exemplar of the mysterious effect which low dodging and low distractions have on the soul4 ,in five minutes he can make you feel as if you had tumbled into one of ,swedenborg's loathsome hells2 he can make the most eloquent of turf thieves feel1 envious1 and he can make you awe-stricken as you see how far and long ,god bears with man4 ,the disease from which this pleasing pillar of the ,state suffers has spread1 with more or less virulence1 to the furthermost recesses of our towns1 and you must know the fringe of the ,turf world before you can so much as guess what the symptoms are like4 ,here is a queer kind of a world which has suddenly arisen6 ,faith and trust are banished2 real honesty is unknown2 purity is less than a name2 manliness means no more than a certain readiness to use the fists4 ,most of the dwellers in this atmosphere are punctilious about money payments because they durst not be otherwise1 but the fine flower of real probity does not flourish in the mephitic air4 ,to lie1 to dodge1 to take mean advantages--these are the accomplishments which an ugly percentage of middle-class youths cultivate1 and all the mischief arises from the fact that they persist in trying to ape the manners of the most unworthy members of an order to which they do not belong4 ,it is bad enough when a rich and idle man is bitten with the taste for betting1 but when he is imitated by the tailor's assistant who carries his clothes home1 then we have a still more unpleasant phenomenon to consider4 ,for it is fatal to a nation when any large and influential section of the populace once begin to be confused in their notions of right and wrong4 ,not long ago ,i was struck by noticing a significant instance of this moral dry rot4 ,an old racing man died1 and all the sporting papers had something to say about him and his career4 ,now the best of the sporting journalists are clever and cultured gentlemen1 who give refinement1 to every subject that they touch4 ,but a certain kind of writing is done by pariahs1 who are not much of a credit to our society1 and ,i was interested by the style in which these scribbling vermin spoke of the dead man4 ,their gush was a trifle nauseating2 their mean worship of money gave one a shiver1 and the relish with which they described their hero's exploits would have been comic were it not for the before-mentioned nausea4 ,it seemed that the departed turfite had been--to use blunt ,english--a very skilful and successful swindler4 ,he would buy a horse which took his fancy1 and he would run the animal again and again1 until people got tired of seeing such a useless brute taken down to the starting-point4 ,the handicappers finally let our schemer's horse in at a trifling weight1 and then he prepared for business4 ,he had trustworthy agents at ,manchester1 ,nottingham1 and ,newcastle1 and these men contrived1 without rousing suspicion1 to dribble money into the market in a stealthy way1 until the whole of their commission was worked on very advantageous terms4 ,the arch-plotter did not show prominently in the transaction1 and he contrived once or twice to throw dust in the eyes of the very cleverest men4 ,one or two neatly arranged strokes secured our acute gentleman a handsome fortune4 ,he missed #gj1jjj once1 by a short head1 but this was the only instance in which his plans seriously failed2 and he was looked up to as an epitome of all the virtues which are most acceptable in racing circles4 ,well1 had this dodger exhibited the heroism of ,gordon1 the benevolence of ,lord ,shaftesbury1 the probity of ,henry ,fawcett1 he could not have been more bepraised and bewailed by the small fry of sporting literature4 ,all he had done in life was to deceive people by making them fancy that certain good horses were bad ones3 strictly speaking1 he made money by false pretences1 and yet1 such is the twist given by association with genuine gamblers1 that educated men wrote of him as if he had been a saint of the most admirable order4 ,this disposition is seen all through the piece3 successful roguery is glorified1 and our young men admire the ,colonel1 or the ,captain1 or ,jack ,this and ,tom ,that1 merely because the ,captain and the ,colonel and ,jack and ,tom are acute rascals who have managed to make money4 ,decidedly1 our national ideals are in a queer way4 ,just think of a little transaction which occurred in #ahhg4 ,a noble lord ordered a miserable jockey boy to pull a horse1 so that the animal might lose a race3 the exalted guide of youth was found out1 and deservedly packed off the ,turf2 but it was only by an accident that the ,stewards were able to catch him4 ,that legislator had funny notions of the duty which he owed to boyhood3 he asked his poor little satellite to play the scoundrel1 and he only did what scores do who are not found out4 ,a haze hangs about the ,turf1 and all the principles which should guide human nature are blurred and distorted2 the high-minded1 honourable racing men can do nothing or next to nothing1 and the scum work their will in only too many instances4 ,every one knows that the ground is palpitating with corruption1 but our national mental disease has so gained ground that some regard corruption in a lazy way as being inevitable1 while others--including the stay-at-home horse-racers--reckon it as absolutely admirable4 ,some years ago1 a pretty little mare was winning the ,st4 ,leger easily1 when a big horse cut into her heels and knocked her over4 ,about two months afterwards1 the same wiry little mare was running in an important race at ,newmarket1 and at the ,bushes she was hauling her jockey out of the saddle4 ,there were not many spectators about1 and only a few noticed that1 while the mare was fighting for her head1 she was suddenly pulled until she reared up1 lost her place1 and reached the post about seventh in a large field4 ,the jockey who rode the mare1 and who made her exhibit circus gambols1 received a thousand pounds from the owner of the winning horse4 ,now1 there was no disguise about this transaction--nay1 it was rather advertised than otherwise1 and a good many of the sporting prints took it quite as a matter of course4 ,why8 ,simply because no prominent racing man raked up the matter judicially1 and because the ordinary ,turf scramblers accept suspicious proceedings as part of their environment4 ,mr4 ,carlyle mourned over the deadly virus of lying which was emitted by ,loyola and his crew2 he might mourn now over the deadly virus of cheating which is emitted from the central ganglia of the ,turf4 ,the upright men who love horses and love racing are nearly powerless2 the thieves leaven the country1 and they have reduced what was once the finest middle-class in the world to a condition of stark putridity4 ,before we can rightly understand the degradation which has befallen us by reason of the ,turf1 we must examine the position of jockeys in the community4 ,lord ,beaconsfield1 in one of his most wicked sentences1 said that the jockey is our ,western substitute for the eunuch2 a noble duke1 who ought to know something about the matter1 lately informed the world through the medium of a court of law with an oath that jockeys are thieves4 ,now1 ,i know one jockey whose character is not embraced by the duke's definition1 and ,i have heard that there are two1 but ,i am not acquainted with the second man4 ,the wonder is1 considering the harebrained1 slavering folly of the public1 that any of the riding manikins are half as honest as they are2 the wonder is that their poor little horsey brains are not led astray in such fashion as to make every race a farce4 ,they certainly do try their best on occasion1 and ,i believe that there are many races which are not arranged before the start2 but you cannot persuade the picked men of the rascals' corps that any race is run fairly4 ,when ,melton and ,paradox ran their tremendous race home in the ,derby1 ,i heard quite a number of intelligent gentry saying that ,paradox should have won but for the adjectived and participled propensities of his jockey4 ,nevertheless1 although most devout turfites agree with the emphatic duke1 they do not idolize their diminutive fetishes a whit the less2 they worship the manikin with a touching and droll devotion1 and1 when they know him to be a confirmed scamp1 they admire his cleverness1 and try to find out which way the little rogue's interest lies1 so that they may follow him4 ,so it comes about that we have amidst us a school of skinny dwarfs whose leaders are paid better than the greatest statesmen in ,europe4 ,the commonest jockey-boy in this company of manikins can usually earn more than the average scholar or professional man1 and the whole set receive a good deal more of adulation than has been bestowed on any soldier1 sailor1 explorer1 or scientific man of our generation4 ,and what is the life-history of the jockey8 ,a tiny boy is bound apprentice1 and submitted to the discipline of a training stable2 he goes through the long routine of morning gallops1 trials1 and so forth1 and when he begins to show signs of aptitude he is put up to ride for his master in public4 ,if he is a born horseman1 like ,archer or ,robinson1 he may make his mark long before his indentures are returned to him1 and he is at once surrounded by a horde of flatterers who do their best to spoil him4 ,there is no cult so distinguished by slavishness1 by gush1 by lavishness1 as jockey-worship1 and a boy needs to have a strong head and sound1 careful advisers1 if he is to escape becoming positively insufferable4 ,when the lad ,robinson won the ,st4 ,leger1 after his horse had been left at the post1 he was made recipient of the most frantic and silly toadyism that the mind can conceive2 the clever trainer to whom he was apprenticed received #a1ejj for transferring the little fellow's services1 and he is now a celebrity who probably earns a great deal more than ,professor ,owen or ,mr4 ,walter ,besant4 ,the tiny boy who won the ,cesarevitch on ,don ,juan received #a1jjj after the race1 and it must be remembered that this child had not left school4 ,mr4 ,herbert ,spencer has not earned #a1jjj by the works that have altered the course of modern thought2 the child ,martin picked up the amount in a lump1 after he had scurried for less than five minutes on the back of a feather-weighted thoroughbred4 ,as the jockey grows older and is freed from his apprenticeship he becomes a more and more important personage2 if his weight keeps well within limits he can ride four or five races every day during the season2 he draws five guineas for a win1 and three for the mount1 and he picks up an infinite number of unconsidered trifles in the way of presents1 since the turfite1 bad or good1 is invariably a cheerful giver4 ,the popular jockey soon has his carriages1 his horses1 his valet1 and his sumptuous house2 noblemen1 millionaires1 great dames1 and men and women of all degrees conspire to pamper him3 for jockey-worship1 when it is once started1 increases in intensity by a sort of geometrical progression4 ,a shrewd man of the world may smile grimly when he hears that a popular rider was actually received with royal honours and installed in the royal box when he went to the theatre during his honeymoon1 but there are the facts4 ,it was so1 and the best people of the fine town in which this deplorable piece of toadyism was perpetrated were tolerably angry at the time4 ,if the sporting journalists perform their work of puffery with skill and care1 the worship of the jockey reaches a pitch that borders on insanity4 ,if ,general ,gordon had returned and visited such a place as ,liverpool or ,doncaster during a race-meeting1 he would not have been noticed by the discriminating crowd if ,archer had passed along the street4 ,if the ,prime ,minister were to visit any place of public resort while ,watts or ,webb happened to be there1 it is probable that his lordship would learn something useful concerning the relative importance of ,her ,majesty's subjects4 ,i know for a fact that a cleverly executed cartoon of ,archer1 ,fordham1 ,wood1 or ,barrett will have at least six times as many buyers as a similar portrait of ,professor ,tyndall1 ,mr4 ,james ,payn1 ,m4 ,pasteur1 ,lord ,salisbury1 ,mr4 ,chamberlain1 or any one in ,britain excepting ,mr4 ,gladstone4 ,i do not know how many times the ,vanity ,fair cartoon of ,archer has been reprinted1 but ,i learn on good authority that1 for years1 not a single day has been known to pass on which the caricature was not asked for4 ,and now let us bring to mind the plain truth that these jockeys are only uneducated and promoted stable-boys after all4 ,is it not a wonder that we can pick out a single honest man from their midst8 ,vast sums depend on their exertions1 and they are surrounded by a huge crowd of moneyed men who will stand at nothing if they can gain their ends2 their unbalanced1 sharp little minds are always open to temptation2 they see their brethren amassing great fortunes1 and they naturally fall into line and proceed1 when their turn comes1 to grab as much money as they can4 ,not long ago the inland revenue officials1 after minute investigation1 assessed the gains of one wee creature at #i1jjj per year4 ,this pigmy is now twenty-six years of age1 and he earned as much as the ,lord ,chancellor1 and more than any other judge1 until a jury decided his fate by giving him what the ,lord ,chief ,justice called a contemptuous verdict4 ,another jockey paid income-tax on #aj1jjj a year1 and a thousand pounds is not at all an uncommon sum to be paid merely as a retainer4 ,forty or fifty years ago a jockey would not have dreamed of facing his employer otherwise than cap in hand1 but the value of stable-boys has gone up in the market1 and ,lear's fool might now say1 ,handy-,dandy6 ,who is your jockey now and who is your master8 ,the little men gradually gather a kind of veneer of good manners1 and some of them can behave very much like pocket editions of gentlemen1 but the scent of the stable remains1 and1 whether the jockey is a rogue or passably honest1 he remains a stable-boy to the end4 ,half the mischief on the ,turf arises from the way in which these overpaid1 spoilt menials can be bribed1 and1 certes1 there are plenty of bribers ready4 ,racing men do not seem able to shake off the rule of their stunted tyrants4 ,when the gentleman who paid income-tax on nine thousand a year brought the action which secured him the contemptuous verdict1 the official handicapper to the ,jockey ,club declared on oath that the jockey's character was as bad as bad can be4 ,the starter and a score of other witnesses followed in the same groove1 and yet this man was freely employed4 ,why8 ,we may perhaps explain by inference presently4 ,with this cynically corrupt corps of jockeys and their hangers-on1 it may easily be seen that the plutocrats who manipulate the ,turf wires have an admirable time of it1 while the great gaping mob of zanies who go to races1 and zanies who stay at home1 are readily bled by the fellows who have the money and the information and the power4 ,the rule of the ,turf is easily formulated3--,get the better of your neighbour4 ,play the game outwardly according to fair rules4 ,pay like a man if your calculations prove faulty1 but take care that they shall be as seldom faulty as possible4 ,never mind what you pay for information if it gives you a point the better of other men4 ,keep your agents honest if you can1 but1 if they happen to be dishonest under pressure of circumstances1 take care at any rate that you are not found out4 ,in short1 the ,ring is mainly made up of men who pay with scrupulous honesty when they lose1 but who take uncommonly good care to reduce the chances of losing to a minimum4 ,are they in the wrong8 ,it depends4 ,i shall not1 at the present moment1 go into details2 ,i prefer to pause and ask what can be expected to result from the wolfish scheme of ,turf morality which ,i have indicated4 ,i do not compare it with the rules which guide our host of commercial middlemen1 because1 if ,i did1 ,i should say that the betting men have rather the best of the comparison3 ,i keep to the ,turf1 and ,i want to know what broad consequences must emanate from a body which organizes plans for plunder and veils them under the forms of honesty4 ,an old hand--the ,odysseus of racing--once said to me3 ,no man on earth would ever be allowed to take a hundred thousand pounds out of the ,ring3 they wouldn't allow it1 they wouldn't ,that young fool must drop all he's got4 ,we were speaking about a youthful madman who was just then being plucked to the last feather1 and ,i knew that the old turfite was right4 ,the ,ring is a close body1 and ,i have only known about four men who ever managed to beat the confederacy in the long run4 ,there is one astute1 taciturn1 inscrutable organizer whom the bookmakers dread a little1 because he happens to use their own methods2 he will scheme for a year or two if necessary until he succeeds in placing a horse advantageously1 and he usually brings off his coup just at the time when the ,ring least like it4 ,they don't yell like that when one of mine rolls home1 he once said1 while the bookmakers were clamouring with delight over the downfall of a favourite2 and indeed this wily master of deceptions has very often made the pencillers draw long faces4 ,but the case of the ,turf ,odysseus is not by any means typical2 the man stands almost alone1 and his like will not be seen again for many a day4 ,the rule is that the backer must come to grief in the long run1 for every resource of chicanery1 bribery1 and resolute keenness is against him4 ,he is there to be plundered2 it is his mission in life to lose1 or how could the bookmakers maintain their mansions and carriages8 ,it matters little what the backer's capital may be at starting1 he will lose it all if he is idiot enough to go on to the end1 for he is fighting against unscrupulous legions4 ,one well-known bookmaker coolly announced in #ahhh that he had written off three hundred thousand pounds of bad debts4 ,consider what a man's genuine business must be like when he can jauntily allude to three hundred thousands as a bagatelle by the way4 ,that same man has means of obtaining information sufficient to discomfit any poor gambler who steps into the ,ring and expects to beat the bookmakers by downright above-board dealing4 ,as soon as he begins to lay heavily against a horse the animal is regarded as doomed to lose by all save the imbeciles who persist in hoping against hope4 ,in #ahhi this betting man made a dead set at the favourite for the ,two ,thousand ,guineas4 ,the colt was known to be the best of his year2 he was trained in a stable which has the best of reputations2 his exercise was uninterrupted1 and mere amateurs fancied they had only to lay heavy odds on him in order to put down three pounds and pick up four4 ,yet the inexorable bookmaker kept on steadily taking the odds2 the more he betted1 the more money was piled on to the unbeaten horse1 and yet few took warning1 although they must have seen that the audacious financier was taking on himself an appalling risk4 ,well1 the peerless colt was pulled out1 and1 on his way to the starting post1 he began to shake blood and matter from his jaws2 he could hardly move in the race1 and when he was taken to his quarters a surgeon let out yet another pint of pus from the poor beast's jaw4 ,observe that the shrewdest trainer in ,england1 a crowd of stable-boys1 the horse's special attendant1 the horse-watchers at ,kingsclere1 and the casual strangers who saw the favourite gallop--all these knew nothing apparently about that monstrous abscess1 and no one suspected that the colt's jaw had been splintered4 ,but information--always information--evidently reached one quarter1 and the host of outsiders lost their money4 ,soon afterwards a beautiful colt that had won the ,derby was persistently backed for the ,city and ,suburban ,handicap4 ,on paper it seemed as if the race might be regarded as over1 for only the last year's ,derby winner appeared to have a chance2 but our prescient penciller cared nothing about paper4 ,once more he did not trouble himself about betting to figures2 he must have laid his book five times over before the flag fell4 ,then the nincompoops who refused to attend to danger-signals saw that the beautiful colt which had spun over the same course like a greyhound only ten months before was unable to gallop at all4 ,the unhappy brute tried for a time1 and was then mercifully eased2 the bookmaker would have lost #ajj1jjj if his information had not been accurate1 but that is just the crux--it was4 ,so admirably do the bookmakers organize their intelligence department that ,i hardly know more than three instances in which they have blundered after they really began to lay fiercely against a horse4 ,they contrive to buy jockeys1 stablemen1 veterinary surgeons--indeed1 who can tell whom they do not subsidize8 ,when ,belladrum came striding from the fateful hollow in front of ,pretender1 there was one leviathan bookmaker who turned green and began to gasp1 for he stood to lose #ej1jjj2 but the leviathan was spared the trouble of fainting1 for the hill choked the splendid ,stockwell horse1 and information was once more vindicated1 while ,belladrum's backers paid copious tribute4 ,just two years before the leviathan had occasion to turn green our ,turf ,odysseus really did manage to deceive the great betting corporation with consummate skill4 ,the whole business throws such a clear light on ,turf ethics that ,i may repeat it for the benefit of those who know little about our great national sport--the ,sport of ,kings4 ,it was rumoured that ,hermit had broken a blood-vessel1 and the animal was stopped for a little in his work4 ,then ,odysseus and his chief confederate proceeded to seize their chance4 ,the horse started at #ajjj to #ae1 and it seemed like a million to one against him1 for his rough coat had been left on him1 and he looked a ragged equine invalid4 ,the invalid won1 however1 by a neck1 the ,marquis of ,hastings was ruined1 and the confederates won about #aej1jjj4 ,as we go over these stories of plot and counterplot1 it is hardly possible to avoid thinking what a singularly high-souled set of gentry we have got amongst4 ,what ambitions6 ,to trick money out of somebody's pocket6 ,to wager when you know that you have made winning certain6 ,the outcome of it all is that1 in the unequal battle between the men who back and the men who lay1 the latter must win2 they will win1 even if they have to cog the dice on a pinch2 and1 moreover1 they will not be found out officially1 even though their secret is as open as if it were written across the sky4 ,a strange1 hard1 pitiless crew are these same bookmakers4 ,personally1 strange to say1 they are1 in private life1 among the most kindly and generous of men2 their wild life1 with its excitement and hurry1 and keen encounters of wits1 never seems to make them anything but thoughtful and liberal when distress has to be aided2 but the man who will go far out of his way to perform a charitable action will take your very skin from you if you engage him in that enclosure which is his battle-ground1 and he will not be very particular as to whether he wins your skin by fair means or foul4 ,about two years ago1 an exasperating1 soft-headed boy brought a colossal fortune into the ,ring4 ,i never pitied him much2 ,i only longed to see him placed in the hands of a good schoolmaster who knew how to use a birch4 ,this piteous wretch1 with his fatuous airs of sharpness1 was exactly the kind of game that the bookmakers cared to fly at2 he was cajoled and stimulated2 he was trapped at every turn2 the vultures flapped round him2 and there was no strong1 wise man to give the booby counsel or to drag him by main force from his fate4 ,there was no pity for the boy's youth2 he was a mark for every obscene bird of prey that haunts the ,turf2 respectable betting men gave him fair play1 though they exacted their pound of flesh2 the birds of ,night gave him no fair play at all4 ,in a few short months he had poured a quarter of a million into the bursting pockets of the ,ring1 and he was at last posted for the paltry sum of #a1djj4 ,this tragic farce was not enacted in a corner2 a hundred journals printed every act as it was played2 the victim never received that one hearty flogging which might have saved him1 and the curtain was at last rung down on a smug1 grinning group of bookmakers1 a deservedly ruined spendthrift1 and a mob of indifferent lookers-on4 ,so minutely circumstantial were the newspapers1 that we may say that all ,england saw a gigantic robbery being committed1 and no man1 on the ,turf or off1 interfered by so much as a sign4 ,decidedly1 the ,ethics of the ,turf offer an odd study for the moralist2 and1 in passing1 ,i may say that the national ethics are also a little queer4 ,we ruin a tradesman who lets two men play a game at billiards for sixpence on licensed premises1 and we allow a silly boy to be rooked of a quarter of a million in nine months1 although the robbery is as well-known as if it were advertised over the whole front page of ,the ,times day by day4 ,in sum1 then1 we have an inner circle of bookmakers who take care either to bet on figures alone1 or on perfectly accurate and secret information2 we have another circle of sharp owners and backers1 who1 by means of modified 7or unmodified7 false pretences1 succeed at times in beating the bookmakers2 we have then an outer circle1 composed partly of stainless gentlemen who do not bet and who want no man's money1 partly of perfectly honest fellows who have no judgment1 no real knowledge1 and no self-restraint1 and who serve as prey on which the bookmakers batten4 ,and then we have circle on circle showing every shade of vice1 baseness1 cupidity1 and blank folly4 ,first1 ,i may glance--and only glance--at the unredeemed1 hopeless villains who are the immediate hangers-on of the ,turf4 ,people hardly believe that there are thousands of sturdy1 able-bodied men scattered among our great towns and cities who have never worked1 and who never mean to work4 ,in their hoggish way they feed well and lie warm--the phrase is their own favourite--and they subsist like odious reptiles1 fed from mysterious sources4 ,go to any suburban race meeting 7,i don't care which you pick7 and you will fancy that ,hell's tatterdemalions have got holiday4 ,whatsoever things are vile1 whatsoever things are roguish1 bestial1 abominable1 belong to the racecourse loafers4 ,to call them thieves is to flatter them1 for their impudent knavery transcends mere thieving2 they have not a virtue2 they are more than dangerous1 and1 if ever there comes a great social convulsion1 they will let us know of their presence in an awkward fashion1 for they are trained to riot1 fraud1 bestiality1 and theft1 on the fringe of the racecourse4 ,then comes the next line of predatory animals who suck the blood of the dupes4 ,if you look at one of the daily sporting papers you will see1 on the most important page1 a number of flaming announcements1 which will make very comic reading for you if you have any sense of humour at all4 ,gentlemen1 who usually take the names of well-known jockeys or trainers1 offer to make your fortune on the most ridiculously easy terms4 ,you forward a guinea or half-a-guinea1 and an obliging prophet will show you how to ruin the bookmakers4 ,old ,tom ,tompkins has a glorious success every week2 ,joe1 and ,bill1 and ,harry1 and a good score more1 are always ready to prove that they named the winner of any given race2 one of these fellows advertises under at least a dozen different names1 and he is able to live in great style and keep a couple of secretaries1 although he cannot write a letter or compose a circular4 ,the ,sporting ,times will not allow one of these vermin to advertise in its columns1 and it has exposed all their dodges in the most conclusive and trenchant set of articles that ,i ever saw2 but other journals admit the advertisements at prices which seem well-nigh prohibitive1 and they are content to draw from #ae to #bj per day by blazoning forth false pretences4 ,i have had much fun out of these tipsters1 for they are deliciously impudent blackguards4 ,a fellow will send you the names of six horses--all losers2 in two days he will advertise--,i beg to congratulate all my patrons4 ,this week ,i was in great form on the whole1 and on ,thursday ,i sent all six winners4 ,a thousand pounds will be paid to any one who can disprove this statement4 ,considering that the sage sent you six losers on the ,thursday1 you naturally feel a little surprised at his tempestuously confident challenge4 ,all the seers are alike2 they pick names at haphazard from the columns of the newspapers1 and then they pretend to be in possession of the darkest stable secrets4 ,if they are wrong1 and they usually are1 they advertise their own infallibility all the more brazenly4 ,i do not exactly know what getting money under false pretences may be if the proceedings which ,i have described do not come under that heading1 and ,i wonder what the police think of the business4 ,they very soon catch a poor ,rommany wench who tells fortunes1 and she goes to gaol for three months4 ,but ,i suppose that the ,rommany rawnee does not contribute to the support of influential newspapers4 ,a sharp detective ought to secure clear cases against at least a dozen of these parasites in a single fortnight1 for they are really stupid in essentials4 ,one of the brotherhood always sets forth his infallible prophecies from a dark little public-house bar near ,fountain ,court4 ,i have seen him1 when ,i came off a journey1 trying to steady his hand at seven in the morning2 his twisted1 tortured fingers could hardly hold the pencil1 and he was fit for nothing but to sit in the stinking dusk and soak whisky2 but no doubt many of his dupes imagined that he sat in a palatial office and received myriads of messages from his ubiquitous corps of spies4 ,he was a poor1 diseased1 cunning rogue2 ,i found him amusing1 but ,i do not think that his patrons always saw the fun of him4 ,and last there comes the broad outer circle1 whereof the thought makes me sad4 ,on that circle are scattered the men who should be ,england's backbone1 but they are all suffering by reason of the evil germs wafted from the centre of contagion4 ,mr4 ,matthew ,arnold often gave me a good deal of advice2 ,i wish ,i could sometimes have given him a little4 ,i should have told him that all his dainty jeers about middle-class denseness were beside the mark2 all the complacent mockery concerning the deceased wife's sister and the rest1 was of no use4 ,if you see a man walking right into a deadly quicksand1 you do not content yourself with informing him that a bit of fluff has stuck to his coat4 ,mr4 ,arnold should have gone among the lower middle-class a trifle more instead of trusting to his superfine imagination1 and then he might have got to know whither our poor1 stupid folks are tending4 ,i have just ended an unpleasantly long spell which ,i passed among various centres where middle-class leisure is spent1 and ,i would not care to repeat the experience for any money4 ,any given town will suit a competent observer1 for ,i found scarcely any vital differences in passing from place to place4 ,it is tragical and disheartening to see scores of fine lads and men1 full of excellent faculties and latent goodness--and all under the spell of the dreary ,circe of the ,turf4 ,i have been for a year1 on and off1 among a large circle of fellows whom ,i really liked2 and what was their staple talk8 ,nothing but betting4 ,the paralysis at once of intellect and of the sense of humour which attacks the man who begins flirting with the gambling ,enchantress struck me with a sense of helplessness4 ,i like to see a race when it is possible1 and ,i can always keep a kind of picture of a horse in my eye4 ,well1 ,i have known a very enthusiastic gentleman say1 ,the ,bard1 sir1 ,the ,bard2 the big horse1 the mighty bay4 ,he'll smother 'em all4 ,i modestly said1 ,do you think he is big enough8 ,big enough6 a giant1 sir6 ,mark my words1 sir1 you'll see ,bob ,peck's colours in triumph on the bay4 ,i mildly said3 ,i thought ,the ,bard was a very little one when ,i saw him1 and he didn't seem bay4 ,he was rather like the colour you might get by shaking a flour-dredger over a mulberry4 ,have you had a look at him8 ,as usual1 ,i found that my learned friend had never seen that horse nor any other2 he was neglecting his business1 loafing with wastrels1 and trying1 in a small way1 to imitate the fine strategy of the ,colonel and the ,captain and ,odysseus4 ,amongst these bewitched unfortunates1 the life of the soul seems to die away4 ,once ,i said to a nice lad1 ,do none of your set ever read anything8 and he made answer1 ,i don't think any of them read very much except the ,sportsman4 ,that was true--very true and rather shocking4 ,the ,sportsman is bright enough and good enough in its way1 and ,i read it constantly2 but to limit your literature to the ,sportsman alone--well1 it must be cramping4 ,but that is what our fine young men are mostly doing nowadays2 the eager1 intellectual life of young ,scotchmen and of the better sort of ,englishmen is unknown3 you may wait for a year and you will never hear a word of talk which is essentially above the intelligence of a hog2 and a man of whom you are fond1 purely because of his kindliness1 may bore you in the deadliest manner by drawling on by the hour about names and weights1 the shifting of the odds1 and the changes of luck4 ,the country fairly swarms with clubs where betting goes on all day1 and sometimes all night3 the despicable dupes are drawn in one after another1 and they fall into manifold varieties of mischief2 agonized parents pray for help2 employers chafe at the carelessness and pre-occupation of their servants2 the dupes sink to ruin unpitied1 and still the crowd steps onward to the gulf of doom4 ,to think that by merely setting certain noble creatures to exhibit their speed and staunchness1 we should have ended by establishing in our midst a veritable ,inferno6 ,our faith1 our honour1 our manhood1 our future as a nation1 are being sacrificed1 and all because ,circe has read her spell over our best and most promising souls4 ,and our legislators amuse themselves with recriminations6 ,we foster a horde of bloodsuckers who rear their strength on our weakness and our vices4 ,why should a drink-seller be kept in check by his having to pay for a license1 while the ruin-seller needs no license1 and is not even required to pay income tax4 ,if licenses to bet were issued at very heavy prices1 and if a crushing fine were inflicted on any man who made a book without holding a license1 we might stamp out the villainous small fry who work in corners at all events4 ,but ,authority is supreme2 the peer and the plutocrat go on unharmed1 while the poor men who copy follies which do not hurt the rich go right on to the death of the soul4 ,april1 #ahhi4 ,,discipline4 ,of the ancestor generally assigned to us by gentlemen who must be right--because they say so--we have very few records save the odd scratches found on bones and stones1 and the remnants of extremely frugal meals eaten ages ago4 ,we gather that the revered ancestor hunted large game with an audacity which must have pleased the ,rider ,haggard of ancient days2 at any rate1 some simple soul certainly scratched the record of a famous mammoth-fight on a tusk1 and we can now see a furious beast charging upon a pigmy who awaits the onset with a coolness quite superior to ,mr4 ,quatermain's heroics4 ,that ,siberian hunter evidently went out and tried to make a bag for his own hand1 and ,i have no doubt that he carried out the principle of individualism until his last mammoth reduced him to pulp4 ,there is no indication of organization1 and1 although the men of the great deltas were able to indulge in oysters with a freedom which almost makes me regret the advance of civilization and the decay of ,whitstable1 yet ,i cannot trace one record of an orderly supper-party4 ,this shows how the heathen in his blindness neglects his natural advantages4 ,long after the savage of the tundras passed away we find vestiges of the family2 and thenceforward discipline advances steadily1 though with occasional relapses toward anarchy1 until we see the ordered perfection which enables us to have ,west-end riots and all-night sittings of the ,house of ,commons without any trouble whatever4 ,i do not care much to deal with the times when the members of the families elected each other promiscuously according to the success with which they managed to club their neighbours--in fact1 ,i wish to come as soon as possible to the period when discipline1 as understood by us1 was gradually allowed to sway the lives of men1 and when the sections of the race recognized tacitly the law of the strongest by appointing their best man as chief4 ,at present we in ,england are passing through a dangerous and critical transition stage2 a very strong party inclines to abolish discipline of all sorts1 the views of the ,continental anarchists are slowly filtering into our great towns1 and1 as soon as such a move is safe1 we shall have a large number of people who will not scruple to cry out for free land1 no taxation1 free everything4 ,we have heard so much about rights lately that some of us are beginning to question within ourselves as to what rights really are4 ,if a gentleman1 no matter how bookish or eloquent he may be1 desires to do away with discipline altogether1 ,i will give him credit for all the tongue-power which he happens to possess2 but ,i must ask leave to think for myself in old-fashioned grooves just a little longer4 ,after all1 a system which--for civilized countries--has been growing gradually for more thousands of years than we dare compute cannot be entirely bad1 no matter what chance faults we may see4 ,the generations that have flown into the night may not have possessed complete wisdom1 but they adapted their social systems step by step to the needs of each new generation1 and it requires very little logic to tell that they would not be likely always to cast out the good4 ,the noisy orator who gets up and addresses a ,london crowd at midnight1 yelling ,down with everything6 can hardly know what he means to destroy4 ,we have come a long way since the man of the swamps hunted the hairy elephant and burrowed in caves2 that very structure in which the anarchists have taken to meeting represents sixty thousand years of slow progression from savagery towards seemliness and refinement and wisdom2 and therefore1 bitterly as we may feel the suffering of the poor orator1 we say to him1 ,wait a little1 and talk to us4 ,i do not touch politics--,i loathe place-hunters and talkers as much as you do2 but you are speaking about reversing the course of the ages1 and you cannot quite manage that4 ,let us forget the windy war of the place-hunters1 and speak reasonably and in a broad human way4 ,i do not by any means hold with those very robust literary characters who want to see the principle of stern ,drill carried into the most minute branchings of our complex society4 7,by-the-way1 these robust gentry always put a capital ,d to the word ,drill1 as though they would have their precious principle enthroned as an object of reverence1 or even of worship47 ,and ,i am inclined to think that not a few of them must have experienced a severe attack of wrath when they found ,carlyle suggesting that ,king ,friedrich ,wilhelm would have laid a stick across the shoulders of literary men had he been able to have his own way4 ,the unfeeling old king used to go about thumping people in the streets with a big cudgel2 and ,carlyle rather implies that the world would not have been much the worse off if a stray literary man here and there could have been bludgeoned4 ,the king flogged apple-women who did not knit and loafers who were unable to find work2 and our historian apparently fancies that the dignity of kingship would have been rather enhanced than otherwise had his hero broken the head of a poet or essayist4 ,this is a clear case of a disciplinarian suffering from temporary derangement4 ,i really cannot quite stomach such heroic and sweeping work4 ,carlyle1 who was a ,scotch peasant by birth1 raised himself until he was deservedly regarded as the greatest man of his day1 and he did this by means of literature2 yet he coolly sets an ignorant1 cruel1 crowned drill-serjeant high above the men of the literary calling4 ,it is a little too much6 ,suppose that ,carlyle had been flogged back to the plough-tail by some potentate when he first went to the ,university2 should we not have heard a good deal of noise about the business sooner or later8 ,again1 we find ,mr4 ,froude writing somewhat placidly when he tells us about the men who were cut to pieces slowly in order that their agony might be prolonged4 ,the description of the dismemberment of ,ballard and the rest1 as given in the ,curiosities of ,literature1 is too gratuitously horrible to be read a second time2 but ,mr4 ,froude is convinced that the whole affair was no more than a smart and salutary lesson given to some obtrusive ,papists1 and he commends the measures adopted by ,elizabeth's ministers to secure proper discipline4 ,similarly the wholesale massacre of the people in the ,english northern counties is not at all condemned by the judicious ,mr4 ,freeman4 ,the ,conqueror left a desert where goodly homesteads and farms had flourished2 but we are not any the less to regard him as a great statesman4 ,i grow angry for a time with these bold writers1 but ,i always end by smiling1 for there is something very feminine about such shrill expressions of admiration for force4 ,i like to figure to myself the troubles which would have ensued had ,carlyle lived under the sway of his precious ,friedrich4 ,it was all very well to sit in a comfortable house in pleasant ,chelsea1 and enlarge upon the beauties of drill and discipline2 but1 had the sage been cast into one of the noisome old ,german prisons1 and kept there till he was dying1 merely because the kingly disciplinarian objected to a phrase in a pamphlet1 we should have heard a very curious tune from our great humourist4 ,a man who groaned if his bed was ill-made or his bacon ill-fried would not quite have seen the beauty of being disciplined in a foul cellar among swarming vermin4 ,the methods of certain other rulers may no doubt appear very fine to our robust scribblers1 but ,i must always enter my own slight protest4 ,ivan the ,terrible was a really thorough-paced martinet who preserved discipline by marvellously powerful methods4 ,he did not mind killing a few thousands of men at a time2 and he was answerable for several pyramids of skulls which remained long after his manly spirit had passed away4 ,he occasionally had prisoners flayed alive or impaled merely by way of instituting a change2 and ,i think that some graphic ,british historian should at once give us a good life of this remarkable and royal man4 ,the massacre of the revolted peasants would afford a fine opening to a stern rhetorician2 he might lead off thus--,dost thou think that this king cared for noble sentiment8 ,thou poor creature who canst not look on a man without turning green with feminine terror1 this writer begs to inform you and all creatures of your sort that law is law and discipline is discipline1 and the divine origin of both is undeniable even in an age of advertised soap and interminable spouting4 ,ivan had no parliamentary eloquence under his control1 but he had cold steel and whips and racks and wheels1 and he employed them all with vigour for the repression of undisciplined scoundrels4 ,he butchered some thousands of innocent men6 ,ah1 my sentimental friend1 an anarchic mob cannot be ruled by sprinkling rose-water2 the lash and the rope and the stern steel are needed to bring them to order6 ,when my ,noble ,one1 with a glare in his lion eyes1 watched the rebels being skinned alive1 he was performing a truly beneficent function and preparing the way for that vast1 noble1 and expansive ,russia which we see to-day4 ,the poor long-eared mortals who were being skinned did not quite perceive the beneficence at the time4 ,how should they1 unhappy long-eared creatures that they were8 ,oh1 ,dryasdust1 does any long-eared mortal who is being skinned by a true ,king--a ,canning1 ,kniglich1 ,able ,man--does the long-eared one amid his wriggles ever recognize the scope and transcendent significance of ,kingship8 ,answer me that1 ,dryasdust1 or shut your eloquent mouth and go home to dinner4 ,that is quite a proper style for a disciplinarian1 but ,i have not got into the way of using it yet4 ,for1 to my limited intelligence1 it appears that1 if you once begin praising ,friedrichs and ,charlemagnes and ,ivans at the rate of a volume or so per massacre1 you may as well go on to ,cetewayo and ,timour and ,attila--not to mention ,sulla and ,koffee ,kalkalli4 ,i abhor the floggers and stranglers and butchers2 and when ,i speak of discipline1 ,i leave them out of count4 ,my business is a little more practical1 and ,i have no time to refute at length the vociferations of persons who tell us that a man proves his capacity of kingship by commanding the extinction or torture of vast numbers of human creatures4 ,my thoughts are not bent on the bad deeds--the deeds of blood--wrought out in bitterness and anguish either long ago or lately2 ,i am thinking of the immense ,european fabric which looks so solid outwardly1 but which is being permeated by the subtle forces of decay and disease4 ,discipline is being outwardly preserved1 but the destroying forces are creeping into every weak place1 and the men of our time may see strange things4 ,gradually a certain resolute body of men are teaching weaker people that even self-discipline is unnecessary1 and that self-reverence1 self-knowledge1 self-control are only phrases used by interested people who want to hold others in slavery4 ,in our ,england it is plainer every day that the character of the people is changing4 ,individual men are obedient1 brave to the death1 self-sacrificing1 just as they always were even in our darkest times2 but1 none the less1 it is too plain that authority ordained by law is dying1 and that authority which rests on vague and fluctuating sentiment gains power with steady swiftness4 ,the judges sit and retain all their old confidence2 the magistrates sentence daily their batches of submissive culprits2 the policeman rules supreme over the streets--he scares the flower-girl1 and warns the pensive burglar with the staccato thunder of his monarchical foot4 ,all seems very firm and orderly2 and our largest crowds maintain their attitude of harmless good-humour when no inflammatory talkers are there4 ,but the hand has written1 and true discipline cannot survive very much longer unless we rouse ourselves for a dead-lift effort4 ,take ,parliament at the crown of the social structure1 and the ,school--the elementary school--at the foundation1 and we cannot feel reassured4 ,all between the highest and the lowest is moderately sound2 the best of the middle-classes are decent1 law-abiding1 and steady2 the young men are good fellows in a way2 the girls and young women are charming and virtuous4 ,but the extremities are rotten1 and sentiment has rotted them both4 ,parliament has become a hissing and a scorn4 ,no man of any party in all broad ,england could be found to deny this1 and many would say more4 ,the sentimentalist has said that loutishness shall not be curbed1 that a bawling ruffian who is silenced is martyred1 that every man shall talk as he likes1 and the veto of the ,polish ,assembly which enabled any one man to ruin the work of a session is revived in sober1 solid ,england4 ,so it is that all has gone to wreck2 and an assembly once the noblest on earth is treated with unhidden contempt by the labourer in his field and the mechanic at his bench4 ,and all this has arisen from lack of discipline4 ,in the ,school--the lower-class school--things are much worse4 ,the lowest of the low--the beings who should be kept in order by sharp1 firm kindness and justice--have been taught to mock at order and justice and to treat kindness as a sign of weakness4 ,the lads will all soon be ready to aid in governing the country4 ,may the good powers defend us6 ,what a set of governors6 ,the son of the aristocrat is easily held in order1 because he knows that any infraction of discipline will be surely punished2 the son and daughter of the decent artizan cause little trouble to any teacher1 because they know that their parents are on the side of order1 and1 even if the children are inclined to be rebellious1 they dare not defy the united authority of parents and teacher4 ,but the child of the thief1 the costermonger1 the racecourse swindler1 the thriftless labourer1 is now practically emancipated through the action of sentimental persons4 ,he may go to school or not1 as he likes2 and1 while the decent and orderly poor are harried by ,school ,board regulations1 the rough of the slum snaps his fingers without fear at all regulations4 ,if one of the bad boys from the rookeries does go to school1 he soon learns that he may take his own way4 ,if he is foul-mouthed1 thievish1 indecent1 or insolent1 and is promptly punished1 he drags his teacher into a police-court1 and the sentimentalists secure a conviction4 ,no one can tell the kind of anarchy that reigns in some parts of ,england excepting men who dwell amidst it2 and1 to make matters worse1 a set of men who may perhaps be charitably reckoned as insane have framed a ,parliamentary measure which may render any teacher who controls a young rough liable at once to one hundred pounds fine or six months' imprisonment4 ,this is no flight of inventive humour on our part2 it is plain fact which may probably be seen in action as law before twelve months are over4 ,tyranny ,i abhor1 cruelty ,i abhor--above all1 cruelty to children4 ,but we are threatened at one pole of the ,state-world with a tyranny of factioneers who cultivate rudeness and rowdyism as a science1 while at the other pole we are threatened with the uncontrolled tyranny of the residuum4 ,we must return to our common sense2 the middle-classes must make themselves heard1 and we must teach the wild spirits who aim at wrecking all order that safety depends upon the submission of all to the expressed will of the majority4 ,debate is free enough--too free--and no man is ever neglected ultimately if he has anything rational to say1 so that a minority has great power2 but1 when once a law is made1 it must be obeyed4 ,england is mainly sound2 our movement is chiefly to the good2 but this senseless pampering of loutishness in high and low places is a bad symptom which tends to such consequences as can be understood only by those who have learned to know the secret places4 ,if it is not checked--if anarchists1 young and old1 are not taught that they must obey or suffer--there is nothing ahead but tumult1 heart-burning1 and wreck4 ,march1 #ahhi4 ,,bad ,,company4 ,there has been much talk about the insensate youth who boasted that he had squandered half-a-million on the ,turf in a year4 ,the marvellous journalists who frequent betting resorts printed hundreds of paragraphs every week explaining the wretched boy's extravagances--how he lost ten thousand pounds in one evening at cards2 how he lost five thousand on one pigeon-shooting match2 how he kept fifty racehorses in training2 how he made little presents of jewelry to all and sundry of his friends2 how he gaily lost fifteen thousand on a single race1 though he might have saved himself had he chosen2 how he never would wear the same shirt twice4 ,dear boy6 ,every day those whose duty compels them to read newspapers were forced to see such nauseous stuff1 so that a lad's private business became public property1 and no secret was made of matters which were a subject for grief and scorn4 ,hundreds of grown men stood by and saw that boy lose a fortune in two hours1 and some forty paragraphs might have been collected in which the transaction was described in various terms as a gross swindle4 ,a good shot was killing pigeons--gallant sport--and the wealthy schoolboy was betting4 ,when a sign was given by a bookmaker the shooting-man obeyed1 and won or lost according to orders2 and every man in the assembly knew what foul work was being carried on4 ,did one man warn the victim8 ,the next day the whole country knew what had happened1 and the names of the thieves were given in almost every sporting print2 but the mischief was done1 and the lookers-on contented themselves with cheap wrath4 ,a few brief months flew by1 and every day saw the usual flock of tributes to the mad boy's vanity2 and now the end has come--a colossal fortune1 amassed by half a century's toil1 has gone into the pockets of all sorts of knaves1 and the fatal ,gazette showed the end4 ,the princely fortune that might have done so much good in the world has gone to fatten the foulest flock of predatory birds that ever cumbered the earth4 ,where are the glib parasites who came to fawn on the poor dolt8 ,where are the swarms of begging dandies who clustered around him8 ,where are the persons who sold him useless horses8 ,any one who has eyes can see that they point their fingers and shrug4 ,another victim gone--that is all4 ,and now our daily moralizers declare that bad company alone brought our unhappy subject down4 ,yes1 bad company6 ,the boy might have grown up into beneficent manhood2 he might have helped to spread comfort and culture and solid happiness among the people2 but he fell into bad company1 and he is now pitied and scorned by the most despicable of the human race2 and ,i observe that one of his humorous ,press patrons advises him to drive a cab4 ,think of ,gordon nobly spending his pittance among the poor mudlarks2 think of the good ,lord ,shaftesbury ekeing out his scanty means among the poor2 think of all the gallant souls that made the most of poverty2 and then think of that precious half-million gone to light fresh fuel under the hotbeds of vice and villainy6 ,should ,i be wrong if ,i said that the contrast rouses me to indignation and even horror8 ,and now let us consider what bad company means4 ,paradoxical as it may seem1 ,i do not by any means think that bad company is necessarily made up of bad men4 ,i say that any company is bad for a man if it does not tempt him to exert his higher faculties4 ,it is as certain as death that a bodily member which is left unused shrinks and becomes aborted4 ,if one arm is hung for a long time in a sling1 the muscles gradually fade until the skin clings closely round the bone4 ,the wing of the huge penguin still exists1 but it is no bigger than that of a wren1 and it is hidden away under the skin4 ,the instances might be multiplied a thousandfold4 ,in the same way then any mental faculty becomes atrophied if it is unused4 ,bad company is that which produces this atrophy of the finer powers2 and it is strange to see how soon the deadly process of shrinkage sets in4 ,the awful thing to think of is that the cramp may insensibly be set in action by a company which1 as ,i have said1 is composed of rather estimable people4 ,who can forget ,lydgate in ,middlemarch8 ,there is a type drawn by a woman of transcendent genius2 and the type represents only too many human wrecks4 ,lydgate was thrown into a respectable provincial society2 he was mastered by high ambition1 he possessed great powers1 and he felt as though he could move the mocking solidities of the world4 ,watch the evolution of his long history2 to me it is truly awful in spite of its gleams of brightness4 ,the powerful young doctor1 equipped in frock-coat and modern hat1 plays a part in a tragedy which is as moving as any ever imagined by a brooding1 sombre ,greek4 ,as you read the book and watch the steady1 inexorable decline of the strong man1 you feel minded to cry out for some one to save him--he is alive to you1 and you want to call out and warn him4 ,when the bitter end comes1 you cannot sneer as ,lydgate does--you can hardly keep back the tears4 ,and what is it all about8 ,it simply comes to this1 that a good strong man falls into the bad company of a number of fairly good but dull people1 and the result is a tragedy4 ,rosamund ,vincy is a pattern of propriety2 ,mrs4 ,vincy is a fat1 kindly soul2 ,mr4 ,vincy is a blustering good-natured middle-class man4 ,there is no particular harm among the whole set1 yet they contrive to ruin a great man2 they lower him from a great career1 and convert him into a mere prosperous gout-doctor4 ,every high aspiration of the man dies away4 ,his wife is essentially a commonplace pretty being1 and she cannot understand the great heart and brain that are sacrificed to her2 so the genius is forced to break his heart about furniture and carpets and respectability1 while the prim pretty young woman who causes the ghastly death of a soul goes on fancying herself a model of good sense and virtue and all the rest4 ,of course ,i should like you to make discoveries1 she says2 but she only shudders at the microscopic work4 ,when the financial catastrophe comes1 she has the great soul at her mercy1 and she stabs him--stabs him through and through--while he is too noble and tender to make reply4 ,ah1 it is pitiful6 ,lydgate is like too many others who are stifling in the mud of respectable dullness4 ,the fate of those men proves what we have asserted1 that bad company is that which does not permit the healthful and fruitful development of a soul4 ,take the case of a brilliant young man who leaves the ,university and dives into the great whirlpool of ,london4 ,perhaps he goes to the ,bar1 and earns money meantime by writing for the ,press4 ,the young fellows who swarm in the ,london centres--that is1 the higher centres--are gentlemen1 polished in manner and strict as to the code of honour1 save perhaps as regards tradesmen's bills2 no coarse word or accent escapes them1 and there is something attractive about their merry stoicism4 ,but they make bad company for a young and high-souled man1 and you may see your young enthusiast1 after a year of town-life1 converted into a cynic who tries to make game of everything4 ,he talks lightly of women1 because that is considered as showing a spirit of superiority2 he is humorous regarding the state of his head on the morning after a late supper2 he can give you slangy little details about any one and every one whom you may meet at a theatre or any other public place2 he is somewhat proud when some bellowing1 foul-mouthed bookmaker smiles suavely and inquires1 ,doing anything to-day1 sir8 ,mark you1 he is still a charming young fellow2 but the bloom has gone from his character4 ,he has been in bad company4 ,let it be remembered that bad company may be pleasant at first2 and ,i can easily give the reason for that1 although the process of thinking out the problem is a little complicated4 ,the natural tendency of our lower nature is toward idleness2 our higher nature drives us to work4 ,but no man ever attained the habit of work without an effort4 ,if once that effort is slackened1 then the lower nature gains sway by degrees and idleness creeps in4 ,idleness is the beginning of almost every form of ill1 and the idlest man dashes down the steep to ruin either of body or soul1 perhaps of both4 ,now the best of us--until our habits are formed--find something seductive in the notion of idleness2 and it is most marvellous to observe how strongly we are apt to be drawn by a fascinating idle man4 ,by-the-way1 no one would accuse the resident ,cambridge professors of being slothful1 yet one brilliant idle man of genius said1 ,when ,i go to ,cambridge1 ,i affect them all with a murrain of idleness4 ,i should paralyze the work of the place if ,i were resident4 ,to return--it appears that the best of men1 especially of youthful men1 feel the subtle charm of an invitation to laziness4 ,the man who says1 ,it's a sin to be indoors to-day2 let us row up to the backwater and try a smoke among the willows2 or the one who says1 ,never mind mathematics to-night2 come and have a talk with me1 is much more pleasing than the stern moralist4 ,well1 it happens that the most dangerous species of bad company is the species ,idler4 ,look round over the ranks of the hurtful creatures who spoil the ,state1 corrupt and sap the better nature of young men1 and disgrace the name of our race4 ,what are they all but idlers pure and simple8 ,idleness1 idleness1 the tap-root of misery1 sin1 villainy6 ,note the gambler at ,monte ,carlo1 watching with tense but impassive face as the red and the black take the advantage by turns--he is an idler4 ,the roaring bookmaker who contaminates the air with his cries1 and who grows wealthy on the spoil of fools--he is an idler4 ,the silly beings who crowd into the betting-shops and lounge till morning in the hot air2 the stout florid person who passes from bar to bar in a commercial town2 the greasy scoundrel who congregates with his mates at street corners2 the unspeakable dogs who prowl at night in ,london and snatch their prey in lonely thoroughfares2 the jolly gangs of young men who play cards till dawn in provincial club-rooms2 even the slouching poacher who passes his afternoons in humorous converse at the ale-house--they are all idlers1 and they all form bad company for anybody who comes within range of their influences4 ,we are nearing the point of our demonstration4 ,the youth is at first attracted by the charm of mere laziness1 but he does not quite know it4 ,look at the case of the lad who goes fresh from school to the city1 and starts life at seventeen years of age4 ,we will say that he lives in a suburb of some great town4 ,at first he returns home at night full of quite admirable resolves2 he intends to improve himself and advance himself in the world4 ,but on one fine evening a companion suggests a stroll1 and it happens that billiards are suggested4 ,away goes the youngster into that flash atmosphere through which sharp1 prematurely-aged features loom so curiously2 he hears the low hum1 he sees the intense eagerness and suspense of the strikers1 and he learns to like the place4 ,after a while he is found there nightly2 his general style is low1 his talk is that of the music-hall--the ineffable flash air has taken the place of his natural repose4 ,he ought to be studying as many languages as possible1 he ought to be watching the markets abroad1 or he should be reading the latest science if he is engaged in practical work4 ,but no--he is in bad company1 and we find him at eight-and-twenty a disappointed1 semi-competent man who grumbles very much about the ,germans4 ,if we go to the lower classes1 we observe the same set of phenomena4 ,a young workman is chatting with his friends in a public-house on ,saturday night2 he rises to go at half-past nine1 but his comrades pull him down4 ,make it eleven o'clock1 they say4 ,he drinks fast in the last hour1 and is then so exhilarated that he probably conveys a supply of beer home4 ,on ,sunday morning he feels muddled1 heavy1 a little troubled with nausea2 his mates hail him joyously1 and then the company wait with anxiety until the public-houses are open2 then the dry throats are eased and the low spirits raised1 and the game goes on till three4 ,in the afternoon the young workman sleeps1 and when he wakes up he is so depressed that he goes out and meets his mates again4 ,once more he is persuaded to exceed1 but he reckons on having a good long sleep4 ,with aching head and fevered hands he makes a wild rush next morning1 and arrives at the shop only to find himself shut out4 ,he is horrified and doleful1 when up come a few of his friends4 ,they laugh the matter off4 ,it's only a quarter lost6 ,there's time for a pint before we go in4 ,so the drinking is begun again1 and the men have none of the delicacy and steadiness of hand that are needed4 ,is it not an old story8 ,the loss of quarters1 half-days1 and days goes on2 then ,saint ,monday comes to be observed2 then the spoiled young man and his merry crew begin to draw very short wages on ,saturdays2 then the foreman begins to look askance as the blinking uneasy laggard enters2 and last comes the fatal quiet speech1 ,you won't be required on ,monday4 ,bad company6 ,as for the heartbreaking cases of young men who go up to the ,universities full of bright hope and equipped at all points splendidly1 they are almost too pitiful4 ,very often the lads who have done so well that subscriptions are raised for them are the ones who go wrong soonest4 ,a smart student wins a scholarship or two1 and his parents or relatives make a dead-lift effort to scrape money so that the clever fellow may go well through his course4 ,at the end of a year the youth fails to present any trophies of distinction2 he comes home as a lounger2 this is slow and the other is slow1 and the old folk are treated with easy contempt4 ,still there is hope--so very brilliant a young gentleman must succeed in the end4 ,but the brilliant one has taken up with rich young cads who affect bull-terriers and boxing-gloves2 he is not averse from a street-brawl in the foggy ,november days2 he can take his part in questionable choruses2 he yells on the tow-path or in the pit of the theatre1 and he is often shaky in the morning after a dose of very bad wine4 ,all the idleness and rowdyism do not matter to ,brown and ,tomkins and the rest of the raffish company1 for they only read for the pass degree or take the poll2 but the fortunes--almost the lives--of many folk depend on our young hopeful's securing his ,class1 and yet he fritters away time among bad talk1 bad habits1 bad drink1 and bad tobacco4 ,then come rumours of bills1 then the crash1 and the brilliant youth goes down1 while ,brown and ,tomkins and all the rowdies say1 ,what a fool he was to try going our pace6 ,bad company6 ,i should therefore say to any youth--,always be doing something--bad company never do anything2 and thus1 if you are resolved to be always doing something useful1 it follows that you will not be among the bad company4 ,this seems to me to be conclusive2 and many a broken heart and broken life might have been kept sound if inexperienced youths were only taught thus much continually4 ,october1 #ahhh4 ,,good ,,company4 ,let it be understood that ,i do not intend to speak very much about the excellent people who are kind enough to label themselves as ,society1 for ,i have had quite enough experience of them at one time and another1 and my impressions are not of a peculiarly reverential kind4 ,company among the set who regard themselves as the cream of ,england's--and consequently of the world's--population is something so laborious1 so useless1 so exhausting that ,i cannot imagine any really rational person attending a function 7that is the proper name7 if ,providence had left open the remotest chance of running away2 at any rate1 the rational person would not endure more than one experience4 ,for1 when the clear-seeing outsider looks into ,society1 and studies the members who make up the little clique1 he is smitten with thoughts that lie too deep for tears--or laughter4 ,a perfectly fresh mind1 when brought to bear on the ,society phenomenon1 asks1 ,what are these people8 ,what have they done8 ,what are they particularly fitted for8 ,is there anything noble about them8 ,is their conversation at all charming8 ,are any of them really happy8 ,and to all of these queries the most disappointing answers must be returned4 ,take the men4 ,here is a marquis who is a ,knight of the ,garter4 ,he has held offices in several ,cabinets2 he can control the votes spread over a very large slice of a county1 and his income amounts to some trifle like one hundred and eighty thousand pounds per year4 ,we may surely expect something of the superb aristocratic grace here1 and surely a chance word of wit may drop from a man who has been in the most influential of ,european assemblies6 ,alas6 ,the potentate crosses his hand over his comfortable stomach1 and his contributions to the entertainment of the evening amount to occasional ejaculations of ,ugh6 ,ugh6 ,hah6 ,hey6 ,exactly6 ,ugh6 ,ugh6 ,in the higher spheres of intellect and breeding ,i have no doubt but that ,ugh6 ,ugh6 ,hah6 ,hey6 may have some profound significance2 but1 to say the least1 it is not obviously weighty4 ,the marchioness is sweet in manner1 grave1 reposeful1 and with a flash of wit at disposal--not too obvious wit--that would offend against the canon which ordains restraint2 but she might1 one thinks1 become tiresome in an hour4 ,no one could say that her manners were anything but absolutely simple1 yet the very simplicity is so obviously maintained as a sort of gymnastic effort that it tires us only to study it4 ,then here is a viscount1 graceful1 well-set1 easy in his pose1 talking with a deep voice1 and lisping to the faintest degree4 ,he has owned some horses1 caused some scandals1 waltzed some waltzes1 and eaten a very large number of good dinners3 he has been admired by many1 hated by many1 threatened by many1 and he would not be admitted to any refined middle-class home2 yet here he is in his element1 and no one would think of questioning his presence4 ,he never uttered a really wise or helpful word in his life1 he never did anything save pamper himself--his precious self--and yet he is in ,society1 and reckoned as rather an authority too6 ,these are only types1 but1 if you run through them all1 you must discover that only the sweet and splendid girls who have not had time to be spoilt and soured are worth thinking about4 ,if there is dancing1 it is of course carried out with perfect grace and composure2 if there is merely an assembly1 every one looks as well as possible1 and every one stares at every one else with an air as indifferent as possible4 ,but the child of nature asks in wild bewilderment1 ,where on earth does the human companionship come in8 ,young girls are nowadays beginning to expect bright talk from their partners1 and the ladies have a singularly pretty way of saying the most biting things in a smooth and unconcerned fashion when they find a dunce beginning to talk platitudes or to patronize his partner2 but the middle generation are unspeakably inane2 and the worst is that they regard their inanity as a decided sign of distinction4 ,a grave man who adds a sense of humour to his gravity may find a sort of melancholy entertainment if he listens to a pair of thorough-paced ,society gentry4 ,he will learn that you do not go to a function to please others or to be pleased yourself2 you must not be witty--that is bad form2 you must not be quietly in earnest--that is left to literary people2 you must not speak plain1 direct truth even in the most restrained fashion--that is to render yourself liable to be classified as a savage4 ,no4 ,you go to a function in order1 firstly1 to see who else is there2 secondly1 to let others see you2 thirdly1 to be able to say to absentees that you saw they were not there2 fourthly1 to say1 with a liquid roll on the ll1 ,she's looking remarkably wellll4 ,these are the great and glorious duties of the ,society person4 ,a little funny creature was once talking to a writer of some distinction4 ,the little funny man would have been like a footman if he had been eight inches taller1 for his manners savoured of the pantry4 ,as it was1 he succeeded in resembling a somewhat diminutive valet who had learnt his style and accent from a cook4 ,the writer1 out of common politeness1 spoke of some ordinary topic1 and the valet observed with honest pride1 ,we don't talk about that sort of thing4 ,the writer smiled grimly from under his jutting brows1 and he repeated that valet's terrific repartee for many days4 ,the actual talk which goes on runs in this way1 ,quite charming weather6 ,yes1 very4 ,i didn't see you at ,lady ,blank's on ,tuesday8 ,no2 we could hardly arrange to suit times at all4 ,she was looking uncommonly well4 ,the new ,north-,country girl has come out4 ,so ,i've heard4 ,going to ,goodwood8 ,yes4 ,we take ,brighton this time with the ,sendalls4 ,and so on4 ,it dribbles for the regulation time1 and1 after a sufficient period of mortal endurance1 the crowd disperse1 and proceed to scandalize each other or to carry news elsewhere about the ladies who were looking remarkably well-l-l4 ,as for the dreadful crushes1 what can one say8 ,the absurd rooms where six hundred people try to move about in a space meant for three hundred2 the staircase a ,black-,hole tempered by flowers2 the tired smile of the hostess2 the set simper of long-recked shaven young men2 the patient1 tortured hypocrisy of hustled and heated ladies2 the babble of scrappy nothings2 the envy1 hatred1 malice1 and all uncharitableness2 the magnificence turned into meanness2 the lack of all feeling of home1 and the discontented dispersal of ungrateful people--are these the things to occupy life8 ,are these the things to interest any manly man who is free to act for himself8 ,hardly4 ,but our company refers to the meeting of human souls and hearts1 and not to the meeting of a fortuitous concourse of male and female evening-dresses4 ,i have now before me a very brilliant published account of a reception at ,george ,eliot's house4 ,those assemblies were company1 and company of the finest kind4 ,the exaggerated fuss made by the sibyl's husband in order to secure silence while she was speaking sometimes became a little embarrassing when men of a humorous turn were there2 but nevertheless the best in ,england met in that drawing-room1 and all that was highest in literature1 science1 and art was talked over in graceful fashion4 ,the sniffing drawl of ,society and the impudent affectation of cynicism were not to be found2 and grave men and women--some of them mournful enough1 it may be--agreed to make the useful hours fleet to some profit4 ,no man or woman in ,england--or in ,europe for that matter--was unwilling to enter that modest but brilliant assemblage1 and ,i wish some one could have taken minute notes1 though that of course would have been too entirely shocking4 ,when ,i think of that little deep-voiced lady gathering the choicest spirits of her day together1 and keeping so many notes in tuneful chime1 ,i hardly know whether to use superlatives of admiration about her or superlatives of contempt about the fribbles who crush each other on staircases and babble like parrots in an aviary4 ,if we cast back a little1 we have another example of an almost perfect company4 ,people have talked of ,johnson1 ,burke1 ,boswell1 ,beauclerc1 and ,goldsmith until the subject is growing a thought stale2 but1 unless a reader takes ,boswell and reads the book attentively after he has come to maturity1 he can hardly imagine how fine was that admirable company4 ,they were men of high aims and strong sense2 they talked at their very best1 and they talked because they wished to attain clear views of life and fate4 ,the old gladiator sometimes argued for victory1 but that was only in moments of whim1 and he was always ready to acknowledge when he was in error4 ,those men may sometimes have drunk too much wine2 they may have spoken platitudes on occasion2 but they were good company for each other1 and the hearty1 manly friendship which all but poor ,goldsmith and ,boswell felt for every one else was certainly excellent4 ,assemblies like the ,club are impossible nowadays2 but surely we might find some modification suited even to our gigantic intellects and our exaggerated cleverness6 ,i have defined bad company2 ,i may define good company as that social intercourse which tends to bring out all that is best in man4 ,i have said my bitter word about the artificial society of the capital2 but ,i never forget the lovely quiet circles which meet in places far away from the blare of the city4 ,in especial ,i may refer to the beautiful family assemblies which are almost self-centred4 ,the girls are all at home1 but the boys are scattered4 ,harry writes from ,india1 with all sorts of gossip from ,simla1 and many longings for home2 a neighbour calls1 and the ,indian letter gives matter for pleasant half-melancholy chat4 ,then the quiet evening passes with books and placid casual talk2 the nerves from the family stretch perhaps all over the world1 but all the threads converge on one centre4 ,this life is led in many places1 and the folk who so live are good company among themselves1 and good company for all who meet them4 ,the very thought of the men who are usually described in set slang phrases is enough to arouse a shudder4 ,the loud wit who cracks his prepared witticisms either at the head of a tavern-table or in private society is a mere horror4 ,the tavern men of the commercial traveller class are very bad1 for their mirth is prepared2 their jokes have run the length and breadth of the ,united ,kingdom1 and they are not always prepared to sacrifice the privilege of being coarse which used to be regarded as the joker's prerogative4 ,in moving about the world ,i have always found that the society of the great commercial room set up for being jolly1 but ,i could never exactly perceive where the jollity entered4 ,noise1 sham gentility1 the cackle of false laughter were there2 but the strong1 sincere cheerfulness of friendly men--never6 ,yet the tavern humourist1 or even the club joker1 is as nothing compared with the true professional wit4 ,who can remember that story about ,theodore ,hook and the orange8 ,hook wrote a note to the hostess1 saying1 ,ask me at dinner if ,i will venture on an orange4 ,the lady did so1 and then the brilliant wit promptly made answer1 ,i'm afraid ,i should tumble off4 ,a whole volume of biography is implied in that one gruesome and vulgar anecdote4 ,in truth1 the professional wit is no company at all2 he has the effect of a performing monkey suddenly planted on the table1 and his efforts are usually quite on a level with the monkey's4 ,among the higher ,bohemian sets--,bohemian they call themselves1 as if there ever was a ,bohemian with five hundred a year6--good company is common4 ,i may say1 with fear and much trembling1 that the man of letters1 the man who can name you all the ,restoration comedies or tell you the styles of the contemporaries of ,alan ,chartier is a most terrible being1 and ,i should risk sharks rather than remain with him on a desolate island2 but a mixed set of artists1 musicians1 verse-makers1 novelists1 critics--yea1 even critics--contrive usually to make an unusually pleasant company4 ,they are all so clever that the professional wit dares not raise his voice lest some wielder of the bludgeon should smite him2 no long-winded talk is allowed1 and1 though a bore may once be admitted to the company1 he certainly will never be admitted more than once4 ,the talk ranges loosely from point to point1 and yet a certain sequence is always observed2 the men are freed from conventions2 they like each other and know each other's measure pretty well2 so the hours fly in merry fashion1 and the brethren who carried on the symposium go away well pleased with themselves and with each other4 ,there can be no good company where the capacity for general agreement is carried too far in any quarter4 ,unity of aim1 difference of opinion--those are the elements that make men's conversations valuable4 ,last of all1 ,i must declare that there can be no good company unless women are present4 ,the artists and authors and the rest are all very well in their way1 but the dexterous unseen touch of the lady is needed2 and no man can reckon himself fit to converse at all unless he has been taught by women's care1 and gently reproved by women's impalpable skill4 ,young men of our day are beginning to think it childish or tedious to mix much in women's society2 the consequence is that1 though many of them go a long way toward being gentlemen1 too many are the merest cubs that ever exhibited pure loutishness in conversation4 ,the subtle blending1 the light give-and-take of chat between men and women is the true training which makes men graceful of tongue1 kindly in the use of phrases1 and1 ,i believe1 pure in heart4 ,october1 #ahhh4 ,,going ,a-,,walking4 ,one of the most pestilent of all social nuisances is the athlete who must be eternally performing feats1 and then talking about them4 ,he goes to the ,alps1 and1 instead of looking at the riot of sunset colour or the immortal calm of the slumbering peaks1 he attempts performances which might be amusing in a circus of unlimited size1 but which are not in the least interesting when brought off on the mighty declivities of the great hills4 ,one of these gentlemen takes up a quarter of a volume in telling us how he first of all climbed up a terrible peak1 then fell backwards and slid down a slope of eight hundred feet1 cutting his head to the bone1 and losing enough blood to make him feel faint ,the same gentleman had seen two of his companions fly into eternity down the grim sides of the same mountain2 but he must needs climb to the top1 not in order to serve any scientific purpose1 or even to secure a striking view1 but merely to say he had been there4 ,after an hour on the summit of the enormous mass of stone1 he came down2 and ,i should have liked to ask him what he reckoned to be the net profit accruing to him for his little exploit4 ,wise men do not want to clamber up immense and dangerous ,alps2 there is a kind of heroic lunacy about the business1 but it is not useful1 and it certainly is not inviting4 ,if a thoughtful man goes even in winter among the mountains1 their vast repose sinks on his soul2 his love of them never slackens1 and he returns again and again to his haunts until time has stiffened his joints and dulled his eyes1 and he prepares to go down into the dust of death4 ,but the wise man has a salutary dislike of break-neck situations2 he cannot let his sweet or melancholy fancies free while he is hanging on for dear life to some inhospitable crag1 so he prefers a little moderate exercise of the muscles1 and a good deal of placid gazing on scenes that ennoble his thoughts and make his imagination more lofty4 ,one of the mountain-climbing enthusiasts could not contrive to break his neck in ,europe1 so1 with a gallantry worthy of a better cause1 he went to ,south ,america and scaled ,chimborazo4 ,he could not quite break his neck even in the ,andes1 but he no doubt turned many athletic friends yellow with envy4 ,yet another went to the ,caucasus1 and found so many charming and almost deadly perils there that he wants numbers of people to go out and share his raptures4 ,the same barren competitive spirit breaks out in other directions4 ,men will run across the ,north ,sea in a five-ton boat1 though there are scores of big and comfortable steamers to carry them3 they are cramped in their tiny craft2 they can get no exercise2 their limbs are pained2 they undergo a few days of cruel privation--and all in order that they may tell how they bore a drenching in a cockboat4 ,on the roads in our own ,england we see the same disposition made manifest4 ,the bicyclist tears along with his head low and his eyes fixed just ahead of the tyre of his front wheel2 he does not enjoy the lovely panorama that flits past him1 he has no definite thought1 he only wants to cover so many miles before dark2 save for the fresh air that will whistle past him1 thrilling his blood1 he might as well be rolling round on a cinder track in some running-ground4 ,but the walker--the long-distance walker--is the most trying of all to the average leisurely and meditative citizen4 ,he fits himself out with elaborate boots and ribbed stockings2 he carries resin and other medicaments for use in case his feet should give way2 his knapsack is unspeakably stylish1 and he posts off like a spirited thoroughbred running a trial4 ,his one thought is of distances2 he gloats over a milestone which informs him that he is going well up to five and a half miles per hour1 and he fills up his evening by giving spirited but somewhat trying accounts of the pace at which he did each stage of his pilgrimage4 ,in the early morning he is astir1 not because he likes to see the diamond dew on the lovely trees or hear the chant of the birds as they sing of love and thanksgiving--he wants to make a good start1 so that he may devour even more of the way than he did the day before4 ,in any one lane that he passes through there are scores of sights that offer a harvest to the quiet eye2 but our insatiable athlete does not want to see anything in particular until the sight of his evening steak fills him with rapture4 ,if the most patient and urbane of men were shut up with one of these tremendous fellows during a storm of rain1 he would pray for deliverance before a couple of hours went by2 for the competitive athlete's intelligence seems to settle in his calves1 and he refers to his legs for all topics which he kindly conceives to possess human interest4 ,of course the swift walker may become a useful citizen should we ever have war2 he will display the same qualities that were shown by the sturdy ,bavarians and ,brandenburgers who bore those terrible marches in #ahgj and swept ,mac,mahon into a deadly trap by sheer endurance and speed of foot2 but he is not the ideal companion4 ,persons who are wise proceed on a different plan2 they wish to make the most of every moment1 and1 while they value exercise1 they like to make the quickened currents of their blood feed a receptive and perhaps somewhat epicurean brain4 ,to the judicious man our lovely country affords a veritable harvest of delights--and the delights can be gained with very little trouble4 ,i let the swift muscular men hurry away to the ,tyrol or the ,caucasus or the ,rocky ,mountains1 or whithersoever else they care to go1 and ,i turn to our own windy seashore or quiet lanes or flushed purple moorlands4 ,i do not much care for the babble of talk at my elbow2 but one good companion who has cultivated the art of keeping silent is a boon4 ,suppose that you follow me on a roundabout journey4 ,say we run northward in the train and resolve to work to the south on foot2 we start by the sea1 and foot it on some fine gaudy morning over the springy links where the grass grows gaily and the steel-coloured bent-grass gleams like the bayonets of some vast host4 ,the fresh wind sings from the sea and flies through the lungs and into the pores with an exhilarating effect like that of wine2 the waves dance shoreward1 glittering as if diamonds were being pelted down from the blue arch above2 the sea-swallows sweep over the bubbling crests like flights of silver arrows4 ,it is very joyous4 ,you have set off early1 of course1 and the rabbits have not yet turned into their holes for their day-long snooze4 ,watch quietly1 and you may perhaps see how they make their fairy rings on the grass4 ,one frolicsome brown rogue whisks up his white tail1 and begins careering round and round2 another is fired by emulation and joins2 another and another follow1 and soon there is a flying ring of merry little creatures who seem quite demented with the very pleasure of living4 ,one bounds into the air with a comic curvet1 and comes down with a thud2 the others copy him1 and there is a wild maze of coiling bodies and gleaming white tails4 ,but let the treacherous wind carry the scent of you down on the little rascals and you will see a change4 ,an old fellow sits up like a kangaroo for an instant1 looking extremely wise and vigilant2 he drops and kicks the ground with a sharp thud that can be heard a long way off2 the terror of man asserts itself in the midst of that pure1 peaceful beauty1 and the whole flock dart off in agitated fashion till they reach their holes2 then they seem to look round with a sarcastic air1 for they know that you could not even raise a gun to your shoulder in time to catch one of them before he made his lightning dive into the darksome depths of the sand-hill4 ,how strange it is that meditative men like to watch the ways of wild things6 ,white of ,selborne did not care much for killing anything in particular2 he enjoyed himself in a beautiful way for years1 merely because he had learned to love the pretty creatures of fen and meadow and woodland4 ,mr4 ,russell ,lowell can spend a happy day in watching through his glass the habits of the birds that haunt his great garden2 he does not want a gun2 he only cares to observe the instincts which ,god has implanted in the harmless children of the air4 ,on our walking tour we have hundreds of chances to see the mystic mode of life pursued by the creatures that swarm even in our crowded ,england2 and if we use our eyes we may see a score of genuine miracles every day4 ,on the pleasant links there is always something new to draw the eye4 ,out on the flashing sea a ship rolls bravely away to north or south2 her sails are snowy in certain lights1 and then in an instant she stands up in raiment of sooty black4 ,you may make up a story about her if you are fanciful4 ,perhaps she is trailing her way into the deep quiet harbour which you have just left1 and the women are waiting until the rough bearded fellows come lumbering up the quay4 ,perhaps she was careering over the rushing mountain waves to the southward of the desolate ,horn only a few weeks ago1 and the men were counting the days wearily1 while the lasses and wives at home sighed as the wind scourged the sea in the dreary night and set all the rocks thundering with the charges of mad surges4 ,a little indulgence of the fancy does you no harm even though you may be all wrong2 very likely the skipper of the glad-looking vessel is tipsy1 maybe he has just been rope's-ending his cabin-boy or engaging in some equally unpoetic pursuit2 still no one is harmed by idealizing a little1 and so1 by your leave1 we will not alter our crude romance of the sailor-men4 ,meantime1 as you go on framing poetic fancies1 there is a school of other poets up above you1 and they are composing their fantasies at a pretty rate4 ,the modest brown lark sits quietly amid the sheltering grass1 and will hardly stir1 no matter how near her you may go2 but her mate1 the glorious singer1 is far away up toward the sun1 and he shouts in his joyous ecstasy until the heaven is full of his exquisite joyance4 ,imagine how he puts his heart into his carol6 ,he is at least a mile above you1 and you can hear him over a radius of half a mile1 measured from the place where he will drop4 ,the little poets chant one against the other1 and yet there is no discord1 for the magic of distance seems to harmonize song with song1 and the tumult soothes instead of exciting you4 ,who is the poet who talks of drawing a thread of honey through your heart8 ,it is a quaint1 conceited phrase1 and yet somehow it gives with absurd felicity some idea of the lark's song4 ,they massacre these innocents of the holy choir by thousands1 and put them in puddings for ,cockneys to eat4 ,the mere memory of one of those beatified mornings makes you want to take the blood of the first poulterer whom you find exposing a piteous string of the exquisite darlings4 ,but we must not think of blood1 or taxes1 or ,german bands1 or political speeches1 or any other abomination1 for our walk takes us through flowery regions of peace4 ,your muscles tighten rarely as you stump on over the elastic herbage2 two miles an hour is quite enough for your modest desires1 especially as you know you can quicken to four or five whenever you choose4 ,as the day wears on1 the glorious open-air confusion takes possession of your senses1 your pulses beat with spirit1 and you pass amid floating visions of keen colour1 soft greenery1 comforting shades4 ,the corn rustles on the margin where the sandy soil ceases2 the sleepy farmhouses seem to 'give you a lazy greeting1 and the figures of the labourers are like natural features of the landscape4 ,everything appears friendly2 it may be that the feeling of kindness and security arises from your physical well-being1 but it is there all the same1 and what can you do more than enjoy8 ,perhaps in the midst of your confused happiness your mind begins acting on its own account1 and quite disregards its humble companion1 the body4 ,xavier de ,maistre's mind always did so1 and left what ,xavier called the poor bte of a carcass to take care of itself2 and all of us have to experience this double existence at times4 ,then you find the advantages of knowing a great deal of poetry4 ,i would not give a rush for a man who merely pores over his poets in order to make notes or comments on them2 you ought to have them as beloved companions to be near you night and day1 to take up the parable when your own independent thought is hazy with delight or even with sorrow4 ,as you tramp along the whistling stretches amid the blaze of the ragworts and the tender passing glances of the wild veronica1 you can take in all their loveliness with the eye1 while the brain goes on adding to your pleasure by recalling the music of the poets4 ,perhaps you fall into step with the quiver and beat of our ,british ,homer's rushing rhymes1 and ,marmion thunders over the brown hills of the ,border1 or ,clara lingers where mingles war's rattle with groans of the dying4 ,perhaps the wilful brain persists in crooning over the ,belle ,dame ,sans ,merci2 your mood flutters and changes with every minute1 and you derive equal satisfaction from the organ-roll of ,milton or the silvery flageolet tones of ,thomas ,moore4 ,if culture consists in learning the grammar an etymologies of a poet's song1 then no cultured man will ever get any pleasure from poetry while he is on a walking tour2 but1 if you absorb your poets into your being1 you have spells of rare and unexpected delight4 ,the halt is always pleasant4 ,on our sand-hills the brackens grow to an immense height1 and1 if you lie down among them1 you are surrounded by a pale green gleam1 as if you had dived beneath some lucent sun-smitten water4 ,the ground-lark sways on a frond above you2 the stonechat lights for an instant1 utters his cracking cry1 and is off with a whisk2 you have fair1 quiet1 and sweet rest1 and you start up ready to jog along again4 ,you come to a slow clear stream that winds seaward1 lilting to itself in low whispered cadences4 ,over some broad shallow pool paven with brown stones the little trout fly hither and thither1 making a weft and woof of dark streaks as they travel2 the minnows poise themselves1 and shiver and dart convulsively2 the leisurely eel undulates along1 and perhaps gives you a glint of his wicked eye2 you begin to understand the angler's fascination1 for the most restive of men might be lulled by the light moan of that wimpling current4 ,cruel8 ,alas1 yes6 ,that quaint old cruel coxcomb in his gullet ,should have a hook1 with a small trout to pull it4 ,that was the little punishment which ,byron devised for ,izaak ,walton4 ,but of course1 if you once begin to be supersensitive about cruelty1 you find your way blocked at every cross-road of life1 and existence ceases to be worth having4 ,on1 as the sun slopes1 and his beams fall slant over solemn mounds of cool gray hue and woody fields all pranked in gold4 ,look to the north1 and you see the far-away hills in their sunset livery of white and purple and rose4 ,on the clear summits the snow sometimes lies2 and1 as the royal orb sinks1 you will see the snow blush for a minute with throbbing carnation tints that shift and faint off slowly into cold pallid green4 ,the heart is too full of ecstasy to allow even of thought4 ,you live--that is all6 ,you may continue your wanderings among all the mystic sounds and sights of the night1 but it is better to rest long and well when you can4 ,let the village innkeeper put down for you the coarsest fare that can be conceived1 and you will be content2 for1 as a matter of fact1 any food and drink appeal gratefully to the palate of a man who has been inhaling the raciest air at every pore for eight or ten hours4 ,if the fare does not happen to be coarse--if1 for example1 the landlord has a dish of trout--so much the better2 you do not envy any crowned personage in ,christendom or elsewhere4 ,and how much does your day of ,paradise cost you8 ,at the utmost1 half-a-crown4 ,had you been away on the ,rhine or in ,switzerland or in some ,german home of brigands1 you would have been bleeding at the purse all day1 while in our own matchless land you have had merriment1 wild nature1 air that is like the essence of life--and all for thirty pence4 ,when night falls heavily1 you pass your last hour in listening to the under-song of the sea and the whisper of the roaming winds among the grass4 ,then1 if you are wise and grateful1 you thank the ,giver of all1 and go to sleep4 ,in the jolly greenwoods of the ,midlands you may have enjoyment of another kind4 ,some men prefer the sleepy settled villages1 the sweeping fens with their bickering windmills1 the hush and placidity of old market-towns that brood under the looming majesty of the castle4 ,the truth is that you cannot go anywhere in ,england outside of the blighted hideous manufacturing districts without finding beauty and peace4 ,in the first instance you seek health and physical well-being--that goes without saying2 but the walking epicure must also have dainty thoughts1 full banquets of the mind1 quiet hours wherein resolutions may be framed in solitude and left in the soul to ripen4 ,when the epicure returns to the din of towns1 he has a safeguard in his own breast which tends to keep him alike from folly and melancholy4 ,furthermore1 as he passes the reeking dens where human beings crowd who never see flower or tree1 he feels all churlishness depart from him1 and he is ready to pity and help his less happy brethren4 ,after he has settled to labour again1 his hours of rest are made calmly contented by the chance visions that come to him and show him the blown sea1 the rustling whiteness of fretted surges1 the painted meadows1 and the solemn colours of the dying day4 ,and all this talk we have got only through letting our minds go wandering away on the subject of going a-walking4 ,i have always said that the sweetest pleasures are almost costless4 ,the placid look of the bay mare took all the silliness out of ,walt ,whitman2 and there is more in his queer phrase than meets the eye4 ,one word4 ,when you go a-walking1 do not try to be obtrusively merry4 ,meet a group of tramping gentlemen who have been beer-drinking at noon2 they are surprisingly vivacious until the gaze of the sun becomes importunate2 they even sing as they go1 and their hearty laughter resounds far and near4 ,see them in the afternoon1 and ask where the merriment is2 their eyes are glazed1 their nerves crave slumber1 their steps are by no mean sprightly1 and they probably form a doleful company1 ready to quarrel or think pessimistic thoughts4 ,be calm1 placid1 even2 do not expect too much1 and your reward will be rich4 ,june1 #ahhh4 ,,sport4 ,simple folk fancy that sport must be a joyous pursuit1 and that a sportsman is a jovial1 light-hearted1 and rather innocent person4 ,it may be useful to many parents1 and perhaps to some young people1 if ,i let them know what sport really means nowadays4 ,those who have their imaginations filled with pictures of merry red-coated riders1 or of sturdy gaitered squires tramping through stubble behind their dogs1 are quite welcome to their agreeable visions4 ,the hounds of course meet in hundreds of places in winter-time1 and the bold riders charge gaily across meadows and over fences4 ,it is a splendid1 exhilarating sight2 and no one can find much fault with the pursuit1 for it gives health to thousands4 ,the foxes may perhaps object a little2 but1 if a philosopher could explain to them that1 if they were not preserved for hunting purposes1 they would soon be exterminated1 we have no doubt that they would choose the alternative which gives them a chance4 ,shooting is engaged in with more enthusiasm now than ever it was before2 and doubtless the gentlemen who sit in snug corners and knock down tame pheasants derive benefit--physical and moral--from the lively exercise4 ,but the word sport in ,england does not now refer to hunting and shooting2 it has a wide application1 and it describes in a generic way a number of pursuits which are1 to say the least1 not improving to those who engage in them4 ,the royal sport is of course horse-racing2 and about that amusement--in its present aspect--,i may have something profitable to say4 ,the advocates of racing inform us that the noble sport improves the breed of horses1 and affords wholesome relaxation to men2 they grow quite indignant with the narrow ,puritans who talk stuff about demoralization1 and they have numerous fine phrases referring to old ,england and the spirit of our fathers4 ,all the talk concerning the improving influence of the ,turf on horses and men is pernicious nonsense1 and there is an end of the matter4 ,the ,english thoroughbred is a beautiful creature1 and it is pleasant enough to see him make his splendid rush from start to finish2 amusing also is it to watch the skill of the wiry manikins who ride2 the jockeys measure every second and every yard1 and their cleverness in extracting the last ounce of strength from their horses is quite curious4 ,the merest novice may enjoy the sight of the gay colours1 and he cannot help feeling a thrill of excitement when the thud1 thud of the hoofs sounds near him as the exquisite slender animals fly past4 ,but the persons who take most interest in races are those who hardly know a horse from a mule4 ,they may make a chance visit to a racecourse1 but the speed and beauty of the animals do not interest them in any way2 they cannot judge the skill of a rider2 they have no eye for anything but money4 ,to them a horse is merely a name2 and1 so far from their racing pursuits bringing them health1 they prefer staying in a low club or lower public-house1 where they may gamble without being obliged to trouble themselves about the nobler animals on which they bet4 ,the crowd on a racecourse is always a hideous spectacle4 ,the class of men who swarm there are amongst the worst specimens of the human race1 and1 when a stranger has wandered among them for an hour or so1 he feels as though he had been gazing at one huge1 gross1 distorted face4 ,their language is many degrees below vulgarity2 in fact1 their coarseness can be understood only by people who have been forced to go much amongst them--and that perhaps is fortunate4 ,the quiet stoical aristocrats in the special enclosures are in all ways inoffensive2 they gamble and gossip1 but their betting is carried on with still self-restraint1 and their gossip is the ordinary polished triviality of the country-house and drawing-room4 ,but what can be said of the beings who crowd the betting-ring8 ,they are indeed awful types of humanity1 fitted to make sensitive men shudder4 ,their yells1 their profanity1 their low cunning1 their noisy eagerness to pounce upon a simpleton1 their infamous obscenity1 all combine to make them the most loathsome collection of human beings to be found on the face of the broad earth4 ,observe that all of this betting crew appear to be what is called rolling in money4 ,they never do a stroke of useful work2 they merely howl and make bets--that is their contribution to the prosperity of the ,state4 ,yet they are dressed with vulgar richness1 they fare sumptuously1 and they would not condescend to taste any wine save the finest vintages2 they have servants and good horses1 and in all ways they resemble some rank luxurious growth that has sprung from a putrid soil4 ,mark that these bookmakers1 as they are called1 are not gentlemen in any sense of the word2 some of them are publicans1 some look like prize-fighters1 some like promoted costermongers1 some like common thieves4 ,there is not a man in the company who speaks with a decently refined accent--in short1 to use plain terms1 they are the scum of the earth4 ,whence then comes the money which enables them to live in riotous profusion8 ,the explanation is a sad one1 and ,i trust that these words may warn many young people in time4 ,here is the point to be weighed upon--these foul-mouthed persons in the betting-ring are able to travel about all spring1 summer1 and autumn1 staying in the best hotels and lacking nothing2 in winter they can loll away their time in billiard-rooms4 ,once more1 who supplies the means8 ,it is the senseless outside public who imagine they know something about sport4 ,every town in ,england contains some centre--generally a public-house or a barber's shop--where men meet to make wagers2 the evil influence of the ,turf is almost everywhere apparent1 for it is probable that at least two millions of men are interested in betting4 ,london swarms with vile clubs which are merely gambling saloons2 professional men1 tradesmen1 clerks1 and even artizans crowd into these horrid holes1 and do business with the professional gamblers4 ,in ,london alone there are some half-dozen papers published daily which are entirely devoted to sport1 and these journals are of course bought by the gudgeons who seek destruction in the betting-rooms4 ,in the provinces there are several towns which easily support a daily sporting journal2 and no ordinary paper in the ,north of ,england could possibly survive unless at least one-eighth of its space were devoted to racing matters of various sorts4 ,there are hundreds of thousands of our population who read absolutely nothing save lists of weights and entries1 quotations which give the odds against horses1 and reports of races4 ,not #e per cent1 of these individuals ever see a horse from year's end to year's end1 yet they talk of nothing else but horses1 horses1 horses1 and every effort of their intellects is devoted to the task of picking out winners4 ,incredible as it may seem1 these poor souls call themselves sportsmen1 and they undoubtedly think that their grubbing about in malodorous tap-rooms is a form of sport2 it is their hopeless folly and greed that fill the pockets of the loud-mouthed tenants of the ,ring4 ,some one must supply the bookmakers' wealth1 and the some one is the senseless amateur who takes his ideas from newspapers4 ,the amateur of the tap-room or the club looks down a list of horses and chooses one which he fancies2 perhaps he has received private advice from one of the beings who haunt the training-grounds and watch the thoroughbreds at exercise2 perhaps he is influenced by some enthusiast who bids him risk all he has on certain private information4 ,the fly enters the den and asks the spider1 ,what price ,flora8--that means1 ,what odds are you prepared to lay against the mare named ,flora8 ,the spider answers--say seven to one2 the fly hands one pound to the spider1 and the bet is made4 ,the peculiarity of this transaction is that one of the parties to it is always careful to arrange so that he cannot lose4 ,supposing that there are seven horses entered in a race1 it is certain that six must be losers4 ,the bookmaker so makes his wagers that no matter which of the seven wins he at least loses nothing2 the miserable amateur has only one chance4 ,he may possibly be lucky2 but the chances in the long run are dead against him1 for he is quite at the mercy of the sharp capitalist who bets with him4 ,the money which the rowdies of the ,ring spend so lavishly all comes from the pockets of dupes who persist in pursuing a kind of ignis fatuus which too often leads them into a bog of ruin4 ,this deplorable business of wagering has become universal4 ,we talk of the ,italians as a gambling nation1 but they are not to be compared with the ,english for recklessness and purblind persistence4 ,i know almost every town in ,england1 and ,i say without fear that the main topic of conversation in every place of entertainment where the traveller stays is betting4 ,a tourist must of course make for hotel after hotel where the natives of each place congregate2 and1 if he keeps his ears open1 he will find the gambling venom has tainted the life-blood of the people in every town from ,berwick to ,hastings4 ,it may be asked1 ,how do these silly creatures who bet manage to obtain any idea of a horse8 ,they have not the faintest notion of what any given horse is like1 but they usually follow the advice of some sharper who pretends to know what is going to win4 ,there are some hundreds of persons who carry on a kind of secret trade in information1 and these persons profess their ability to enable any one to win a fortune4 ,the dupes write for advice1 enclosing a fee1 and they receive the name of a horse2 then they risk their money1 and so the shocking game goes on4 ,i receive only too many letters from wives1 mothers1 and sisters whose loved ones are being drawn into the vortex of destruction4 ,let me give some rough colloquial advice to the gamblers--,you bet on horses according to the advice of men who watch them4 ,observe how foolish you are6 ,the horse ,a is trained in ,yorkshire2 the horse ,b at ,newmarket4 ,the man who watches ,a thinks that the animal can gallop very fast1 and you risk your money according to his report4 ,but what means has he of knowing the speed of ,b8 ,if two horses gallop towards the winning-post locked together1 it often happens that one wins by about six inches4 ,there is no real difference in their speed1 but the winner happens to have a neck slightly longer than the other4 ,observe that one race-horse--,buccaneer--has been known to cover a mile at the rate of fifty-four feet per second2 it is therefore pretty certain that at his very highest speed he could move at sixty feet per second4 ,very good2 it happens then that a horse which wins a race by one foot is about one-sixtieth of a second faster1 than the beaten animal4 ,what a dolt you must be to imagine that any man in the world could possibly tell you which of those two brutes was likely to be the winner6 ,it is the merest guess-work2 you have all the chances against you and you might as well bet on the tossing of halfpence4 ,the bookmaker does not need to care1 for he is safe whatever may win2 but you are defying all the laws of chance2 and1 although you may make one lucky hit1 you must fare ill in the end4 ,but no commonsensical talk seems to have any effect on the insensate fellows who are the betting-man's prey1 and thus this precious sport has become a source of idleness1 theft1 and vast misery4 ,one wretch goes under1 but the stock of human folly is unlimited1 and the shoal of gudgeons moves steadily into the bookmaker's net4 ,one betting-agent in ,france receives some five thousand letters and telegrams per day1 and all this huge correspondence comes from persons who never take the trouble to see a race1 but who are bitten with the gambler's fever4 ,no warning suffices--man after man goes headlong to ruin1 and still the doomed host musters in club and tavern4 ,they lose all semblance of gentle humanity2 they become mere blockheads--for cupidity and stupidity are usually allied--and they form a demoralizing leaven that is permeating the nation and sapping our manhood4 ,we have only to consider the position of the various dwarfs who bestride the racehorses in order to see how hard a hold this iniquity has on us4 ,a jockey is merely a stable-boy after all2 yet a successful jockey receives more adulation than does the greatest of statesmen4 ,a theatrical manager has been known to prepare the royal box for the reception of one of these celebrities2 some of the manikins earn five thousand a year1 one of them has been known to make twenty thousand pounds in a year2 and that same youth received three thousand pounds for riding in one race4 ,as to the flattery--the detestable flattery--which the mob bestows on good horsemen1 it cannot be mentioned with patience4 ,in sum1 then1 a form of insanity has attacked ,england1 and we shall pay bitterly for the fit4 ,the idle host who gather on the racecourse add nothing to the nation's wealth2 they are poisonous parasites whose influence destroys industry1 honesty1 and common manliness4 ,and yet the whole hapless crew1 winners and losers1 call themselves sportsmen4 ,i have said plainly enough that every villainous human being seems to take naturally to the ,turf2 but unfortunately the fools follow on the same track as that trodden by the villains1 and thus the honest gentlemen who still support a vile institution have all their work set out in order to prevent the hawks from making a meal of the pigeons4 ,one of the honest guardians of racing morality resigned in bitter despair some time ago1 giving as his reason the assertion that he could trust nobody4 ,nobody6 ,the man was a great lord1 he was totally disinterested and utterly generous1 he never betted a penny1 and he only preferred to see the superb thoroughbreds gallop4 ,lavish he was to all about him--and he could trust nobody4 ,it seems that this despairful nobleman had tolerably good reasons for his hasty departure1 for we have had such a crop of villainies to reap this year as never was gathered before in the same time1 and it appears plain that no animal will be allowed to win any prize unless the foul crew of betting-men accord their kind approval1 and refrain from poisoning the brute4 ,i address myself directly1 and with all the earnestness of which ,i am capable1 to those young simpletons who think that it is a fine and knowing thing to stake money on a horse4 ,some poor silly creatures cannot be taught that they are not even backing a good chance2 they will not learn that the success or failure of horses in important races is regulated by a clique of rapscallions whose existence sullies the very light of day4 ,even if the simpleton chooses the very best horse in a race1 it by no means follows that the creature will win--nay1 the very excellence of an animal is all against its chances of success4 ,the ,ring--which is largely composed of well-to-do black-legs--will not let any man win too much4 ,what earthly chance can a clerk or shopman or tradesman in ,manchester or ,derby have of knowing what passes in the hotels of ,newmarket1 the homes of trainers1 the ,london betting-clubs8 ,the information supplied so copiously by the sporting journals is as good as money can buy1 but the writers on those papers are just as easily deceived as other people4 ,men are out every morning watching the horses take their exercise1 and an animal cannot sneeze without the fact being telegraphed to the remotest corners of the country2 but all this vigilance is useless when roguery comes into the field4 ,observe that for the moment ,i am not speaking about the morality of betting at all4 ,i have my own opinion as to the mental tone of a man who is continually eyeing his neighbour's pocket and wondering what he can abstract therefrom4 ,there is1 and can be1 no friendship save bottle friendship among the animals of prey who spend their time and energy on betting2 and ,i know how callously they let a victim sink to ruin after they have sucked his substance to the last drop4 ,the very face of a betting-man is enough to let you know what his soul is like2 it is a face such as can be seen nowhere but on the racecourse or in the betting-club3 the last trace of high thought has vanished1 and1 though the men may laugh and indulge in verbal horse-play1 there is always something carnivorous about their aspect4 ,they are sharp in a certain line1 but true intelligence is rarely found among them4 ,strange to say1 they are often generous with money if their sentimental side is fairly touched1 but their very generosity is the lavishness of ostentation1 and they seem to have no true kindness in them1 nor do they appear capable of even shamming to possess the genuine helpful nature4 ,eternally on the watch for prey1 they assume the essential nature of predatory animals2 their notion of cleverness is to get the better of somebody1 and their idea of intellectual effort is to lay cunning traps for fools to enter4 ,yes2 the betting-ring is a bad school of morality1 and the man who goes there as a fool and a victim too1 often blossoms into a rogue and a plunderer4 ,with all this in my mind1 ,i press my readers to understand that ,i leave the ethics of wagering alone for the present1 and confine my attention strictly to the question of expediency4 ,what is the use of wearing out nerve and brain on pondering an infinite maze of uncertainties8 ,the rogues who command jockeys and even trainers on occasion can act with certainty1 for they have their eye on the very tap-root of the ,turf upas-tree4 ,the noodles who read sporting prints and try to look knowing can only fumble about among uncertainties2 they and their pitiful money help to swell the triumphs and the purses of rascals1 and they fritter away good brain-power on calculations which have no sound basis whatever4 ,let us get to some facts1 and let us all hope in the name of everything that is righteous and of good report that1 when this article is read1 some blind feather-brains may be induced to stop ere the inevitable final ruin descends upon them4 ,what has happened in the doleful spring of this year8 ,in #ahhg a colt was brought out for the first time to run for the greatest of all ,turf prizes4 ,as usual1 some bagatelle of a million or thereabouts had been betted on a horse which had won several races1 and this animal was reckoned to be incapable of losing3 but the untried animal shot out and galloped home an easy winner4 ,so little was the successful brute distressed by his race that he began to caper out of sheer light-heartedness when he was led back to the enclosure1 and he very soon cleared the place in his gambols--in fact1 he could have run another race within half an hour after the first one4 ,in the autumn this same winner strained a ligament2 but in spite of the accident he ran for another important prize1 and his lightning speed served him in good stead1 for he came in second for the ,st4 ,leger4 ,well1 in the spring this animal was entered in a handicap race1 and the weight which he had to carry seemed so trifling that good judges thought he must romp over the course and win with ease4 ,hundreds of thousands of dolts rushed to wager their money on this chance1 and the horse's owner1 who is anything but a fool1 proceeded to back his own property lavishly4 ,now a certain number of the betting-rogues appeared to know something--if ,i may be pardoned for using their repulsive phraseology--and1 so long as any one was willing to bet on the horse1 they were ready to lay against him4 ,still the pigeons would not take warning by this ominous symptom2 they had chances enough to keep clear of danger1 but they flocked into the snare in their confused fashion4 ,a grain of common sense would have made them ask1 ,why do these shrewd1 hard men seem so certain that our favourite must lose8 ,are they the kind of persons who risk thousands in hard cash unless they know particularly well what they are doing8 ,they bet with an air of certainty1 though some of them must be almost ruined if they have made a miscalculation2 they defy even the owner of the animal1 and they cheerfully give him the opportunity of putting down thousands if he wishes to do so4 ,there must be some reason for this assurance which at first sight looks so very overweening4 ,better have a care6 ,thus would common sense have counselled the victims2 but1 alas1 common sense is usually left out of the composition of the betting-man's victim1 and the flood of honest money rolled into the keeping of men who are certainly no more than indifferent honest4 ,the day of the race came2 the great gaping public dipped their hands in their pockets and accepted short odds about their precious certainty4 ,when the flag fell for the start1 the most wildly extravagant odds were offered against the favourite by the men who had been betting against him all along1 for they saw very soon that they were safe4 ,the poor brute on whose success so many thousands depended could not even gallop2 he trailed on wearily for a little1 without showing any sign of his old gallant fire and speed1 and at last his hopeless rider stopped him4 ,this story is in the mouths of all men2 and now perhaps our simpletons maybe surprised to hear that the wretched animal which was the innocent cause of loss and misery was poisoned by a narcotic4 ,in his efforts to move freely he strained himself1 for the subtle drug deprived him of the power of using his limbs1 and he could only sprawl and wrench his sinews4 ,this is the fourth case of the kind which has recently occurred2 and now clever judges have hit upon the cause which has disabled so many good horses1 after the rascals of the ,ring have succeeded in laying colossal amounts against them4 ,too many people know the dire effects of the morphia injections which are now so commonly used by weak individuals who fear pain and ennui2 the same deadly drug is used to poison the horses4 ,one touch with the sharp needle-point under the horse's elbow1 and the subtle1 numbing poison speeds through the arteries and paralyzes the nerves2 a beautiful creature that comes out full of fire and courage is converted in a very few minutes into a dull helpless mass that has no more conscious volition than a machine4 ,the animal remains on its feet1 but exertion is impossible1 and neither rein1 whip1 nor spur serves to stimulate the cunning poisoner's victim4 ,about the facts there can now be no dispute3 and this last wretched story supplies a copestone to a pile of similar tales which has been in course of building during the past three or four years4 ,enraged men have become outspoken1 and things are now boldly printed and circulated which were mentioned only in whispers long ago4 ,the days of clumsy poisoning have gone by2 the prowling villain no longer obtains entrance to a stable for the purpose of battering a horse's leg or driving a nail into the frog of the foot2 the ancient crude devices are used no more1 for science has become the handmaid of scoundrelism4 ,when in #ahaa a bad fellow squirted a solution of arsenic into a locked horse-trough1 the evil trick was too clumsy to escape detection1 and the cruel rogue was promptly caught and sent to the gallows2 but we now have horse-poisoners who hold a secret similar to that which ,palmer of ,rugeley kept so long4 ,i say a secret1 though every skilled veterinary surgeon knows how to administer morphia1 and knows its effects2 but the new practitioners contrive to send in the deadly injection of the drug in spite of the ceaseless vigilance of trainers1 stablemen1 detectives1 and all other guards4 ,now ,i ask any rational man who may have been tempted to bet1 ,is it worth while8 ,leave out the morality for the present1 and tell us whether you think it business-like to risk your money when you know that neither a horse's speed nor a trainer's skill will avail you when once an acute crew of sharpers have settled that a race must not be won by a certain animal4 ,the miserable creature whose case has served me for a text was tried at home during the second week of ,april2 he carried four stone more than the very useful and fast horse which ran against him1 and he merely amused himself by romping alongside of his opponent4 ,again1 when he took a preliminary canter before the drug had time to act1 he moved with great strength and with the freedom of a greyhound2 yet within three minutes he was no more than an inert mass of flesh and bone4 ,i say to the inexperienced gambler1 ,draw your own conclusions1 and if1 after studying my words1 you choose to tempt fortune any more1 your fate--your evil fate--be on your own head1 for nothing that ,i or any one else can do will save you4 ,not long before the melancholy and sordid case which ,i have described1 and which is now gaining attention and rousing curiosity everywhere1 a certain splendid steeplechaser was brought out to run for the most important of cross-country races4 ,he was a famous horse1 and1 like our ,derby winner1 he bore the fortunes of a good many people4 ,to the confusion and dismay of the men who made sure of his success1 he was found to be stupified1 and suffering from all the symptoms of morphia-poisoning6 ,not long ago an exquisite mare was brought out to run for the ,liverpool ,steeplechase1 and1 like the two ,i have already named1 she was deemed to be absolutely certain of success4 ,she came out merrily from her box2 but soon she appeared to become dazed and silly2 she could not move properly1 and in trying to clear her first fence she staggered like a soddened drunkard and fell4 ,the rascals had not become artistic poisoners at that date1 and it was found that the poor mare had received the drug through a rather large puncture in her nostril4 ,the men whom ,i seek to cure are not worthy of much care2 but they have dependants2 and it is of the women and children that ,i think4 ,here is another pitfall into which the eager novice stumbles2 and once more on grounds of expediency ,i ask the novice to consider his position4 ,according to the decision of the peculiarly-constituted senate which rules racing affairs1 ,i understand that1 even if a horse starts in a race with health and training all in its favour1 it by no means follows that he will win1 or even run well4 ,cunning touches of the bridle1 dexterous movements of body and limbs on the jockey's part1 subtle checks applied so as to cramp the animal's stride--all these things tend to bring about surprising results4 ,the horse that fails dismally in one race comes out soon afterwards and wins easily in more adverse circumstances4 ,i grow tired of the unlucky catalogue of mean swindles1 and ,i should be glad if ,i never heard of the ,turf again2 though1 alas1 ,i have little hope of that so long as betting-shops are open1 and so long as miserable women have the power to address letters to me6 ,i can only implore those who are not stricken with the gambler's fever to come away from danger while yet there is time4 ,a great nobleman like ,lord ,hartington or ,lord ,rodney may amuse himself by keeping racers2 he gains relaxation by running out from ,london to see his pretty colts and fillies gallop1 and he needs not to care very much whether they win or lose1 for it is only the mild excitement and the change of scene that he wants4 ,the wealthy people who go to ,newmarket seek pleasant company as much as anything1 and the loss of a few hundreds hardly counts in their year's expenses4 ,but the poor noodle who can hardly afford to pay his fare and hotel bill--why should he meddle with horses8 ,if an animal is poisoned1 the betting millionaire who backs it swallows his chagrin and thinks no more of the matter1 but the wretched clerk who has risked a quarter's salary cannot take matters so easily4 ,racing is the rich man's diversion1 and men of poor or moderate means cannot afford to think about it4 ,the beautiful world is full of entertainment for those who search wisely2 then why should any man vex heart and brain by meddling with a pursuit which gives him no pleasure1 and which cannot by any chance bring him profit8 ,i have no pity for a man who ascribes his ruin to betting1 and ,i contemn those paltry weaklings whose cases ,i study and collect from the newspapers4 ,certainly there are enough of them6 ,a man who bets wants to make money without work1 and that on the face of it is a dishonourable aspiration2 if he robs some one1 ,i do not in the faintest degree try to palliate his crime--he is a responsible being1 or ought to be one1 and he has no excuse for pilfering4 ,i should never aid any man who suffered through betting1 and ,i would not advise any one else to do so4 ,my appeal to the selfish instincts of the gudgeons who are hooked by the bookmakers is made only for the sake of the helpless creatures who suffer for the follies and blundering cupidity of the would-be sharper4 ,i abhor the bookmakers1 but ,i do not blame them alone2 the sight of means to do ill deeds makes ill deeds done1 and they are doubtless tempted to roguery by the very simpletons who complain when they meet the reward of their folly4 ,i am solely concerned with the innocents who fare hardly because of their selfish relatives' reckless want of judgment1 and for them1 and them alone1 my efforts are engaged4 ,may1 #ahhh ,,degraded ,,men4 ,the man of science derives suggestive knowledge from the study of mere putrefaction2 he places an infusion of common hay-seeds or meat or fruit in his phials1 and awaits events2 presently a drop from one of the infusions is laid on the field of the microscope1 and straightly the economy of a new and strange kingdom is seen by the observer4 ,the microscopist takes any kind of garbage2 he watches the bacteria and their mysterious development1 and he reaches at last the most significant conclusions regarding the health and growth and diseases of the highest organizations4 ,the student of human nature must also bestow his attention on disease of mind if he would attain to any real knowledge of the strange race to which he belongs4 ,we develop1 it is true1 but there are modes and modes of development4 ,i have often pointed out that a steady process of degeneration goes on side by side with the unfolding of new and healthy powers in the animal and vegetable kingdoms4 ,the great ,south ,american lizards grow strong and splendid in hue amid the rank freedom of pampas or forest2 but their poor relatives in the sunless caves of ,transylvania grow milky white1 flabby1 and stone-blind4 ,the creatures in the ,kentucky caves are all aborted in some way or other2 the birds in far-off islands lose the power of flight1 and the shrivelled wings gradually sink under the skin1 and show us only a tiny network of delicate bones when the creature is stripped to the skeleton4 ,the condor soars magnificently in the thin air over the ,andes--it can rise like a kite or drop like a thunderbolt3 the weeka of ,new ,zealand can hardly get out of the way of a stick aimed by an active man4 ,the proud forest giant sucks up the pouring moisture from the great ,brazilian river2 the shoots that rise under the shadow of the monster tree are weakened and blighted by lack of light and free air4 ,the same astounding work goes on among the beings who are so haughty in their assumption of the post of creation's lords4 ,the healthy child born of healthy parents grows up amid pure air and pure surroundings2 his tissues are nourished by strength-giving food1 he lives according to sane rules1 and he becomes round-limbed1 full-chested1 and vigorous4 ,the poor little victim who first sees the light in the ,borough or ,shadwell1 or in the noxious alleys of our reeking industrial towns1 receives foul air1 mere atmospheric garbage1 into his lungs2 he becomes thin-blooded1 his unwholesome pallor witnesses to his weakness of vitality1 his muscles are atrophied1 and even his hair is ragged1 lustreless1 ill-nurtured4 ,in time he transmits his feebleness to his successors2 and we have the creatures who stock our workhouses1 hospitals1 and our gaols--for moral degradation always accompanies radical degradation of the physique4 ,so1 if we study the larger aspects of society1 we find that in all grades we have large numbers of individuals who fall out of the line that is steadfastly progressing1 and become stragglers1 camp-followers--anything you will4 ,let a cool and an unsentimental observer bend himself to the study of degraded human types1 and he will learn things that will sicken his heart if he is weak1 and strengthen him in his resolve to work gallantly during his span of life if he is strong4 ,has any one ever fairly tried to face the problem of degradation8 ,has any one ever learned how it is that a distinct form of mental disease seems to lurk in all sorts of unexpected fastnesses1 ready to breathe a numbing and poisonous vapour on those who are not fortified against the moral malaria8 ,i am not without experience of the fell chances and changes of life2 ,i venture therefore to use some portion of the knowledge that ,i have gathered in order to help to fortify the weak and make the strong wary4 ,if you wander on the roads in our country1 you are almost sure to meet men whom you instinctively recognize as fallen beings4 ,what their previous estate in life may have been you cannot tell1 but you know that there has been a fall1 and that you are looking on a moral wreck4 ,the types are superficially varied1 but an essential sameness1 not always visible at first sight1 connects them and enables you to class them as you would class the specimens in a gallery of the ,british ,museum4 ,as you walk along on a lonely highway1 you meet a man who carries himself with a kind of jaunty air4 ,his woeful boots show glimpses of bare feet1 his clothes have a bright gloss in places1 and they hang untidily2 but his coat is buttoned with an attempt at smartness1 and his ill-used hat is set on rakishly4 ,you note that the man wears a moustache1 and you learn in some mysterious way that he was once accustomed to be very trim and spruce in person4 ,when he speaks1 you find that you have a hint of a cultivated accent2 he sounds the termination ing with precision1 and you also notice that such words as here1 there1 over1 are pronounced with a peculiar broad vowel sound at the end4 ,he cannot look you boldly in the face1 and it is hard to catch a sight of his eyes1 but you may take for granted that the eyes are bad and shifty4 ,the cheeks are probably a little pendulous1 and the jaw hangs with a certain slackness4 ,the whole visage looks as if it had been cast in a tolerably good mould and had somehow run out of shape a little4 ,your man is fluent and communicative2 he mouths his sentences with a genteel roll in his voice1 and he punctuates his talk with a stealthy1 insincere laugh which hardly rises above the dignity of a snigger4 ,now how does such a man come to be tramping aimlessly on a public road8 ,he does not know that he is going to any place in particular2 he is certainly not walking for the sake of health1 though he needs health rather badly4 ,why is he in this plight8 ,you do not need to wait long for a solution1 if the book of human experience has been your study4 ,that man is absolutely certain to begin bewailing his luck--it is always luck4 ,then he has a choice selection of abuse to bestow on large numbers of people who have trodden him down--he is always down-trodden2 and he proves to you that1 but for the ingratitude of ,a1 the roguery of ,b1 the jealousy of ,c1 the undeserved credit obtained by the despicable ,d1 he would be in a far different position to-day1 sir4 ,if he is an old officer--and a few gentlemen who once bore ,her ,majesty's commission are now to be found on the roads1 or in casual wards1 or lounging about low skittle-alleys and bagatelle or billiard tables--he will allude to the gambling that went on in the regiment4 ,how could a youngster keep out of the swim8 ,all went well with him until he took to late hours and devilled bones2 then in the mornings we were all ready for a peg2 and ,i should like to see the man who could get ready for parade after a hard night unless he had something in the shape of a reviver4 ,so he prates on4 ,he curses the colonel1 the commander-in-chief1 and the ,army organization in general2 he gives leering reminiscences of garrison belles--reminiscences that make a pure minded man long to inflict some sort of chastisement on him2 and thus1 while he thinks he is impressing you with an overpowering sense of his bygone rank and fashion1 he really unfolds the history of a feeble unworthy fellow who carries a strong tinge of rascality about him4 ,he is always a victim1 and he illustrates the unvarying truth of the maxim that a dupe is a rogue minus cleverness4 ,the final crash which overwhelmed him was of course a horse-racing blunder4 ,he would have recovered his winter's losses had not a gang of thieves tampered with the favourite for the ,city and ,suburban4 ,do you think1 sir1 that ,highflyer could not have given ,stonemason three stone and a beating8 ,you modestly own your want of acquaintance with the powers of the famous quadrupeds1 and the infatuated dupe goes on1 ,i saw how ,bill ,whipcord was riding2 he eased at the corner1 when ,i wouldn't have taken two thousand for my bets1 and you could see that he let ,stonemason up4 ,i had taken seven to four eight times in hundreds1 and that broke me4 ,the ragged raffish man never thinks that he was quite ready to plunder other people2 he grows inarticulate with rage only when he remembers how he was bitten instead of being the biter4 ,his watery eyes slant as you near a roadside inn1 and he is certain to issue an invitation4 ,then you see what really brought him low4 ,it may be a lovely warm day1 when the acrid reek of alcohol is more than usually abhorrent2 but he must take something strong that will presently inflame the flabby bulge of his cheeks and set his evil eyes watering more freely than ever4 ,gin is his favourite refreshment1 because it is cheap1 and produces stupefaction more rapidly than any other liquid4 ,very probably he will mix gin and ale in one horrid draught--and in that case you know that he is very far gone indeed on the downward road4 ,if he can possibly coax the change out of you when the waiter puts it down he will do so1 for he cannot resist the gleam of the coins1 and he will improvise the most courageous lies with an ease which inspires awe4 ,he thanks you for nothing2 he hovers between cringing familiarity and patronage2 and1 when you gladly part with him1 he probably solaces himself by muttering curses on your meanness or your insolence4 ,once more--how does the faded military person come to be on the roads8 ,we shall come to that presently4 ,observe the temporary lord of the tap-room when you halt on the dusty roads and search for tea or lunch4 ,he is in black1 and a soiled handkerchief is wound round his throat like an eel4 ,he wears a soft felt hat which has evidently done duty as a night-cap many times1 and he tries to bear himself as though the linen beneath his pinned-up coat were of priceless quality4 ,you know well enough that he has no shirt on1 for he would sell one within half an hour if any ,samaritan fitted him out4 ,his boots are carefully tucked away under the bench1 and his sharp knees seem likely to start through their greasy casing4 ,as soon as he sees you he determines to create an impression1 and he at once draws you into the conversation4 ,now1 sir1 you and ,i are scholars--,i am an old ,balliol man myself--and ,i was explaining to these good lads the meaning of the phrase which had puzzled them1 as it has puzzled many more4 ,casus belli1 sir--that is what we find in this local rag of a journal2 and status quo ante bellum4 ,now1 sir1 these ignorant souls couldn't tell what was meant1 so ,i have been enlightening them4 ,i relax my mind in this way1 though you would hardly think it the proper place for a ,balliol man1 while that overfed brute up at the ,hall can drive out with a pair of two-hundred-guinea bays1 sir4 ,fancy a gentleman and a scholar being in this company1 sir6 ,now ,jones1 the landlord there1 is a good man in his way--oh1 no thanks ,jones2 it is not a compliment6--and ,i'd like to see the man who dared say that ,i'm not speaking the truth1 for ,i used to put my hands up like a good one when we were boys at the old 'varsity1 sir4 ,jones1 this gentleman would like something2 and ,i don't mind taking a double dose of ,glenlivat with a brother-scholar and a gentleman like myself4 ,so the mawkish creature maunders on until one's gorge rises2 but the stolid carters1 the idle labourers1 the shoemaker from the shop round the corner1 admire his eloquence1 and enjoy the luxury of pitying a parson and an aristocrat4 ,how very numerous are the representatives of this type1 and how unspeakably odious they are6 ,this foul weed in dirty clothing assumes the pose of a bishop2 he swears at the landlord1 he patronizes the shoemaker--who is his superior in all ways--he airs the feeble remnants of his ,latin grammar and his stock quotations4 ,he will curse you if you refuse him drink1 and he will describe you as an impostor or a cad2 while1 if you are weak enough to gratify his taste for spirits1 he will glower at you over his glass1 and sicken you with fulsome flattery or clumsy attempts at festive wit4 ,enough of this ugly creature1 whose baseness insults the light of ,god's day6 ,we know how he will end2 we know how he has been a fraud throughout his evil life1 and we can hardly spare even pity for him4 ,it is well if the fellow has no lady-wife in some remote quarter--wife whom he can rob or beg from1 or even thrash1 when he searches her out after one of his rambles from casual ward to casual ward4 ,in the wastes of the great cities the army of the degraded swarm4 ,here is the loose-lipped rakish wit1 who tells stories in the common lodging-house kitchen4 ,he has a certain brilliancy about him which lasts until the glassy gleam comes over his eyes1 and then he becomes merely blasphemous and offensive4 ,he might be an influential writer or politician1 but he never gets beyond spouting in a pot-house debating club1 and even that chance of distinction does not come unless he has written an unusually successful begging-letter4 ,here too is the broken professional man4 ,his horrid face is pustuled1 his hands are like unclean dough1 he is like a creature falling to pieces2 yet he can show you pretty specimens of handwriting1 and1 if you will steady him by giving him a drink of ale1 he will write your name on the edge of a newspaper in copper-plate characters or perform some analogous feat4 ,all the degraded like to show off the remains of their accomplishments1 and you may hear some odious being warbling4 ,ah1 che la morte6 with quite the air of a leading tenor4 ,in the dreadful purlieus lurk the poor submissive ne'er-do-well1 the clerk who has been imprisoned for embezzlement1 the ,city merchant's son who is reduced to being the tout of a low bookmaker1 the preacher who began as a youthful phenomenon and ended by embezzling the ,christmas dinner fund1 the forlorn brute whose wife and children have fled from him1 and who spends his time between the police-cells and the resorts of the vilest4 ,if you could know the names of the tramps who yell and make merry over their supper in the murky kitchen1 you would find that people of high consideration would be touched very painfully could they be reminded of the existence of certain relatives4 ,degraded1 degraded are they all6 ,and why8 ,the answer is brief1 and ,i have left it until last1 for no particular elaboration is needed4 ,from most painful study ,i have come to the conclusion that nearly all of our degraded men come to ruin through idleness in the first instance2 drink1 gambling1 and other forms of debauch follow1 but idleness is the root-evil4 ,the man who begins by saying1 ,it's a poor heart that never rejoices1 or who refers to the danger of making ,jack a dull boy1 is on a bad road4 ,who ever heard of a worker--a real toiler--becoming degraded8 ,worn he may be1 and perhaps dull to the influence of beauty and refinement2 but there is always some nobleness about him4 ,the man who gives way to idleness at once prepares his mind as a soil for evil seeds2 the universe grows tiresome to him2 the life-weariness of the old ,romans attacks him in an ignoble form1 and he begins to look about for distractions4 ,then his idleness1 from being perhaps merely amusing1 becomes offensive and suspicious2 drink takes hold upon him2 his moral sense perishes2 only the husks of his refinement remain2 and by and by you have the slouching wanderer who is good for nothing on earth4 ,he is despised of men1 and1 were it not that we know the inexhaustible bounty of the ,everlasting ,pity1 we might almost think that he was forgotten of ,heaven4 ,stand against idleness4 ,anything that age1 aches1 penury1 hard trial may inflict on the soul is trifling4 ,idleness is the great evil which leads to all others4 ,therefore work while it is day4 ,september1 #ahhh4 ,a ,,refinement ,,of ,,sporting ,,cruelty4 ,i firmly believe in the sound manhood of the ,english people1 and ,i know that in any great emergency they would rise and prove themselves true and gallant of soul2 but we happen for the time to have amongst us a very large class of idlers1 and these idlers are steadily introducing habits and customs which no wise observer can regard without solemn apprehensions4 ,the simple ,southampton poet has told us what idle hands are apt to do under certain guidance1 and his saying--truism as it appears--should be studied with more regard to its vital meaning4 ,the idlers crave for novelties2 they seek for new forms of distraction2 they seem really to live only when they are in the midst of delirious excitement4 ,unhappily their feverish unrest is apt to communicate itself to men who are not naturally idlers1 and thus their influence moves outwards like some vast hurtful wind blown from a pestilent region4 ,during the past few years the idlers have invented a form of amusement which for sheer atrocity and wanton cruelty is unparalleled in the history of ,england4 ,i shall say some words about this remarkable amusement1 and ,i trust that gentle women who have in them the heart of compassion1 mothers who have sons to be ruined1 fathers who have purses to bleed1 may aid in putting down an evil that gathers strength every day4 ,most of my readers know what the sport of coursing is2 but1 for the benefit of strictly town-bred folk1 ,i may roughly indicate the nature of the pursuit as it was practised in bygone times4 ,a brace of greyhounds were placed together in the slips--that is1 in collars which fly open when the man who holds the dogs releases a knot2 and then a line of men moved slowly over the fields4 ,when a hare rose and ran for her life1 the slipper allowed her a fair start1 and then he released the dogs4 ,the mode of reckoning the merits of the hounds is perhaps a little too complicated for the understanding of non-sporting people2 but ,i may broadly put it that the dog which gives the hare most trouble1 the dog that causes her to dodge and turn the oftenest in order to save her life1 is reckoned the winner4 ,thus the greyhound which reaches the hare first receives two points2 poor pussy then makes an agonized rush to right or left1 and1 if the second dog succeeds in passing his opponent and turning the hare again1 he receives a point1 and so on4 ,the old-fashioned open-air sport was cruel enough1 for it often happened that the hare ran for two or three miles with her ferocious pursuers hard on her track1 and every muscle of her body was strained with poignant agony2 but there is this to be said--the men had healthy1 matchless exercise on breezy plains and joyous uplands1 they tramped all day until their limbs were thoroughly exercised1 and they earned sound repose by their wholesome exertions4 ,moreover1 the element of fair-play enters into coursing when pursued in the open spaces4 ,pussy knows every foot of the ground2 nightly she steals gently to the fields where her succulent food is found1 and in the morning she steals back again to her tiny nest1 or form1 amid the soft grass4 ,all day she lies chewing the cud in her fashion1 and moving her delicate ears hither and thither1 lest fox or stoat or dog should come upon her unawares2 and at nightfall she steals away once more4 ,every run1 every tuft of grass1 every rising of the ground is known to her2 and1 when at last the tramp of the approaching beaters rouses her1 she rushes away with a distinct advantage over the dogs4 ,she knows exactly whither to go2 the other animals do not1 and usually1 on open ground1 the quarry escapes4 ,i do not think that any greyhound living could catch one of the hares now left on the ,suffolk marshes2 and there are many on the great ,wiltshire plains which are quite capable of rushing at top speed for three miles and more4 ,the chase in the open is cruel--there is no denying it--for poor puss dies many deaths ere she bids her enemies good-bye2 but still she has a chance for life1 and thus the sport1 inhuman as it is1 has a praiseworthy element of fairness in it4 ,but the betting-man1 the foul product of civilization's depravity1 cast his eye on the old-fashioned sport and invaded the field4 ,he found the process of walking up the game not much to his taste1 for he cares only to exercise his leathern lungs2 moreover1 the courses were few and far between and the chances of making wagers were scanty4 ,he set himself to meditate1 and it struck him that1 if a good big collection of hares could be got together1 it would be possible to turn them out one by one1 so that betting might go on as fast and as merrily on the coursing-ground as at the roulette-table4 ,thus arose a sport which is educating many1 many thousands in callousness and brutality4 ,here and there over ,england are dotted great enclosed parks1 and the visitor is shown wide and mazy coverts where hares swarm4 ,plenty of food is strewn over the grass1 and in the wildest of winters pussy has nothing to fear--until the date of her execution arrives4 ,the animals are not natives of those enclosures2 they are netted in droves on the ,wiltshire plains or on the ,lancashire moors1 and packed off like poultry to the coursing-ground4 ,there their life is calm for a long time2 no poachers or lurchers or vermin molest them2 stillness is maintained1 and the hares live in peace4 ,but one day there comes a roaring crowd to the park1 and1 though pussy does not know it1 her good days are passed4 ,look at the mob that surges and bellows on the stands and in the enclosures4 ,they are well dressed and comfortable1 but a more unpleasant gang could not be seen4 ,try to distinguish a single face that shows kindness or goodness--you fail2 this rank roaring crowd is made up of betting-men and dupes1 and it is hard to say which are the worse4 ,there is no horse-racing in the winter1 and so these people have come out to see a succession of innocent creatures die1 and to bet on the event4 ,the slow coursing of the old style would not do for the fiery betting-man2 but we shall have fun fast and furious presently4 ,the assembly seems frantic2 flashy men with eccentric coats and gaudy hats of various patterns stand about and bellow their offers to bet2 feverish dupes move hither and thither1 waiting for chances2 the rustle of notes1 the chink of money1 sound here and there1 and the immense clamour swells and swells1 till a stunning roar dulls the senses1 and to an imaginative gazer it seems as though a horde of fiends had been let loose to make day hideous4 ,a broad smooth stretch of grass lies opposite to the stands1 and at one end of this half-mile stretch there runs a barrier1 the bottom of which is fringed with straw and furze4 ,if you examined that barrier1 you would find that it really opens into a wide dense copse1 and that a hare or rabbit which whisks under it is safe on the far side4 ,at the other side of this field a long fenced lane opens1 and seems to be closed at the blind end by a wide door4 ,to the right of the blind lane is a tiny hut surrounded by bushes1 and by the side of the hut a few scattered men loaf in a purposeless way4 ,presently a red-coated man canters across the smooth green1 and then the diabolical tumult of the stands reaches ear-splitting intensity4 ,your betting-man is cool enough in reality2 but he likes to simulate mad eagerness until it appears as though the swollen veins of face or throat would burst4 ,and what is going on at the closed end of that blind lane8 ,on the strip of turf around the wide field the demure trainers lead their melancholy-looking dogs4 ,each greyhound is swathed in warm clothing1 but they all look wretched2 and1 as they pick their way along with dainty steps1 no one would guess that the sight of a certain poor little animal would convert each doleful hound into an incarnate fury4 ,two dogs are led across to the little hut--the bellow of the ,ring sounds hoarsely on--and the chosen pair of dogs disappear behind the shrubs4 ,and now what is passing on the farther side of that door which closes the lane8 ,a hare is comfortably nestling under a clump of furze when a soft step sounds near her4 ,a man6 ,pussy would like to move to right or left2 but1 lo1 here are other men6 ,decidedly she must move forward4 ,oh1 joy6 ,a swinging door rises softly1 and shows her a delightful long lane that seems to open on to a pleasant open country4 ,she hops gaily onward1 and then a little uneasiness overtakes her2 she looks back1 but that treacherous door has swung down again1 and there is only one road for her now4 ,softly she steals onward to the mouth of the lane1 and then she finds a slanting line of men who wave their arms at her when she tries to shoot aside4 ,a loud roar bursts from the human animals on the stand1 and then a hush falls4 ,now or never1 pussy6 ,the far-off barrier must be gained1 or all is over4 ,the hare lowers her ears and dashes off2 then from the hut comes a staggering man1 who hangs back with all his strength as a pair of ferocious dogs writhe and strain in the leash2 the hounds rise on their haunches1 and paw wildly with their fore-feet1 and they struggle forward until puss has gone a fair distance1 while the slipper encourages them with low guttural sounds4 ,crack6 ,the tense collars fly1 and the arrowy rush of the snaky dogs follows4 ,puss flicks her ears--she hears a thud1 thud1 wallop1 wallop2 and she knows the supreme moment has come4 ,her sinews tighten like bowstrings1 and she darts on with the lightning speed of despair4 ,the grim pursuers near her2 she almost feels the breath of the foremost4 ,twitch6--and with a quick convulsive effort she sheers aside1 and her enemy sprawls on4 ,but the second dog is ready to meet her1 and she must swirl round again4 ,the two serpentine savages gather themselves together and launch out in wild efforts to reach her2 they are upon her--she must dart round again1 and does so under the very feet of the baffled dogs4 ,her eyes are starting with overmastering terror2 again and again she sweeps from right to left1 and again and again the staunch hounds dash along in her track4 ,pussy fails fast2 one dog reaches her1 and she shrieks as she feels his ferocious jaws touch her2 but he snatches only a mouthful of fur1 and there is another respite4 ,then at last one of the pursuers balances himself carefully1 his wicked head is raised1 he strikes1 and the long tremulous shriek of despair is drowned in the hoarse crash of cheering from the mob4 ,brave sport1 my masters6 ,gallant ,britons ye are6 ,ah1 how ,i should like to let one of you career over that field of death with a brace of business-like boarhounds behind you6 ,there is no slackening of the fun1 for the betting-men must be kept busy4 ,men grow frantic with excitement2 young fools who should be at their business risk their money heedlessly1 and generally go wrong4 ,if the hares could only know1 they might derive some consolation from the certainty that1 if they are going to death1 scores of their gallant sporting persecutors are going to ruin4 ,time after time1 in monotonous succession1 the same thing goes on through the day--the agonized hares twirl and strain2 the fierce dogs employ their superb speed and strength2 the unmanly gang of men howl like beasts of prey2 and the sweet sun looks upon all6 ,women1 what do you think of that for ,englishmen's pastime8 ,recollect that the mania for this form of excitement is growing more intense daily2 as much as one hundred thousand pounds may depend on a single course--for not only the mob in the stands are betting1 but thousands are awaiting each result that is flashed off over the wires2 and1 although you may be far away in remote country towns1 your sons1 your husbands1 your brothers1 may be watching the clicking machine that records the results in club and hotel--they may be risking their substance in a lottery which is at once childish and cruel4 ,there is not one word to be said in favour of this vile game4 ,the old-fashioned courser at least got exercise and air2 but the modern betting-man wants neither2 he wants only to make wagers and add to his pile of money4 ,for him the coursing meetings cannot come too often2 the swarming gudgeons flock to his net2 he arranges the odds almost as he chooses--with the help of his friends2 and simpletons who do not know a greyhound from a deerhound bet wildly--not on dogs1 but on names4 ,the sport has all the uncertainty of roulette1 and it is villainously cruel into the bargain4 ,amid all those thousands you never hear one word of pity for the stricken little creature that is driven out1 as ,i have said1 for execution2 they watch her agonies1 and calculate the chances of pouching their sovereigns4 ,that is all4 ,here then is another vast engine of demoralization set going1 just as if the ,turf were not a blight of sufficient intensity6 ,a young man ventures into one of those cruel rings1 buys a card1 and resolves to risk pounds or shillings4 ,if he is unfortunate1 he may be saved2 but1 curiously enough1 it often happens that a greenhorn who does not know one greyhound from another blunders into a series of winning bets4 ,if he wins1 he is lost1 for the fever seizes him2 he does not know what odds are against him1 and he goes on from deep to deep of failure and disaster4 ,well for him if he escapes entire ruin6 ,i have drawn attention to this new evil because ,i have peculiar opportunities of studying the inner life of our society1 and ,i find that the gambling epidemic is spreading among the middle-classes4 ,to my mind these coursing massacres should be made every whit as illegal as dog-fighting or bull-baiting1 for ,i can assure our legislators that the temptation offered by the chances of rapid gambling is eating like a corrosive poison into the young generation4 ,surely ,englishmen1 even if they want to bet1 need not invent a medium for betting which combines every description of noxious cruelty6 ,i ask the aid of women4 ,let them set their faces against tin's horrid sport1 and it will soon be known no more4 ,if the silly bettors themselves could only understand their own position1 they might be rescued4 ,let it be distinctly understood that the bookmaker cannot lose1 no matter how events may go4 ,on the other hand1 the man who makes wagers on what he is pleased to term his fancies has everything against him4 ,the chances of his choosing a winner in the odious new sport are hardly to be mathematically stated1 and it may be mathematically proved that he must lose4 ,then1 apart from the money loss1 what an utterly ignoble and unholy pursuit this trapped-hare coursing is for a manly man6 ,surely the heart of compassion in any one not wholly brutalized should be moved at the thought of those cabined1 cribbed1 confined little creatures that yield up their innocent lives amid the remorseless cries of a callous multitude4 ,poor innocents6 ,is it not possible to gamble without making ,god's creatures undergo torture8 ,if a man were to turn a cat into a close yard and set dogs upon it1 he would be imprisoned1 and his name would be held up to scorn4 ,what is the difference between cat and hare8 ,march1 #ahhg4 ,,liberty4 ,what things are done in thy name6 ,the lady who spoke thus of ,liberty had lived a high and pure life2 all good souls were attracted to her2 and it seems strange that so sweet and pure and beautiful a creature could have grown up in the vile ,france of the days before the ,revolution4 ,she kept up the traditions of gentle and seemly courtesy even at times when ,sardanapalus ,danton was perforce admitted to her salon2 and in an age of suspicion and vile scandal she kept a stainless name1 for even the most degraded pamphleteer in ,paris dared do no more than hint a fault and hesitate dislike4 ,but this lady went to the scaffold with many and many of the young1 the beautiful1 the brave2 and her sombre satire1 ,what things are done in thy name6 was remembered long afterwards when the despots and the invading alien had in turn placed their feet on the neck of devoted ,france4 ,what things are done in thy name6 ,yes2 and we1 in this modern world1 might vary the saying a little and exclaim1 ,what things are said in thy name6--for we have indeed arrived at the era of liberty1 and the gospel of ,rousseau is being preached with fantastic variations by people who think that any speech which apes the forms of logic is reasonable and that any desire which is expressed in a sufficiently loud howl should be at once gratified4 ,we pride ourselves on our knowledge and our reasoning power2 but to judicious observers it often seems that those who talk loudest have a very thin vein of knowledge1 and no reasoning faculty that is not imitative4 ,by all means let us have freedom1 but let us also consider our terms1 and fix the meaning of the things that we say4 ,perhaps ,i should write the things that we think we say1 because so many of those who make themselves heard do not weigh words at all1 and they imagine themselves to be uttering cogent truths when they are really giving us the babble of ,bedlam4 ,if ladies and gentlemen who rant about freedom would try to emancipate themselves from the dominion of meaningless words1 we should all fare better2 but we find a large number of public personages using perfectly grammatical series of phrases without dreaming for a moment that their grave sentences are pure gibberish4 ,a few simple questions addressed in the ,socratic manner to certain lights of thought might do much good4 ,for instance1 we might say1 ,do you ever speak of being free from good health1 or free from a good character1 or free from prosperity8 ,i fancy not2 and yet copiously talkative individuals employ terms quite as hazy and silly as those which ,i have indicated4 ,we have gone very far in the direction of scientific discovery1 and we have a large number of facts at our disposal2 but some of us have quite forgotten that true liberty comes only from submitting to wise guidance4 ,old ,sandy ,mackay1 in ,alton ,locke1 declared that he would never bow down to a bit of brains3 and this highly-independent attitude is copied by persons who fail to see that bowing to the bit of brains is the only mode of securing genuine freedom4 ,if our daring logicians would grant that every man should have liberty to lead his life as he chooses1 so long as he hurts neither himself nor any other individual nor the ,state1 then one might follow their argument2 but a plain homespun proposal like that of mine is not enough for your advanced thinker4 ,in ,england he says1 ,let us have deliverance from all restrictions2 in ,russia he says1 ,anarchy is the only cure for existing evils4 ,for centuries past the earth has been deluged with blood and the children of men have been scourged by miseries unspeakable1 merely because powerful men and powerful bodies of men have not chosen to learn the meaning of the word liberty4 ,how miserable you make the world for one another1 ,o feeble race of men6 ,so said our own melancholy ,english cynic2 and he had singularly good reason for his plaint4 ,rapid generalization is nearly always mischievous2 unless we learn to form correct and swift judgments on every faculty of life as it comes before us1 we merely stumble from error to error4 ,no cut-and-dried maxim ever yet was fit to guide men through their mysterious existence2 the formalist always ends by becoming a bungler1 and the most highly-developed man1 if he is content to be no more than a thinking-machine1 is harmful to himself and harmful to the community which has the ill-luck to harbour him4 ,if we take cases from history1 we ought to find it easy enough to distinguish between the men who sought liberty wisely and those who were restive and turbulent4 ,a wise man or a wise nation knows the kind of restraint which is good2 the fool1 with his feather-brained theories1 never knows what is good for him--he mistakes eternal justice for tyranny1 he rebels against facts that are too solid for him--and we know what kind of an end he meets4 ,some peculiarly daring personages carry their spirit of resistance beyond the bounds of our poor little earth4 ,only lately many of us read with a shock of surprise the passionate asseveration of a gifted woman who declared that it was a monstrous wrong and wickedness that ever she had been born4 ,job said much the same thing in his delirium2 but our great novelist put forth her complaint as the net outcome of all her thought and culture4 ,we only need to open an ordinary newspaper to find that the famous writer's folly is shared by many weaker souls2 and the effect on the mind of a shrewd and contented man is so startling that it resembles the emotion roused by grotesque wit4 ,the whole story of the ages tells us dismally what happens when unwise people choose to claim the measure of liberty which they think good2 but somehow1 though knowledge has come1 wisdom lingers1 and the grim old follies rear themselves rankly among us in the age of reason4 ,when we remember the ,swiss mountaineers who took their deaths joyously in defence of their homes1 when we read of the devoted brave one who received the sheaf of spears in his breast and broke the oppressor's array1 none of us can think of mere vulgar rebellion4 ,the ,swiss were fighting to free themselves from wrongs untold2 and we should hold them less than men if they had tamely submitted to be caged like poultry4 ,again1 we feel a thrill when we read the epitaph which says1 ,gladly we would have rested had we won freedom4 ,we have lost1 and very gladly rest4 ,the very air of bravery1 of steady self-abnegation seems to exhale from the sombre1 triumphant words4 ,russia is the chosen home of tyranny now1 but her day of brightness will come again4 ,it is safe to prophesy so much1 for ,i remember what happened at one time of supreme peril4 ,prussia and ,austria and ,italy lay crushed and bleeding under the awful power of ,napoleon1 and it seemed as though ,russia must be wiped out from the list of nations when the great army of invaders poured in relentless multitudes over the stricken land4 ,the conqueror appeared to have the very forces of nature in his favour1 and his hosts moved on without a check and without a failure of organization4 ,so perfectly had he planned the minutest details that1 although his stations were scattered from the ,beresina to the ,seine1 not so much as a letter was lost during the onward movement4 ,how could the doomed country resist8 ,so thought all ,europe4 ,but the splendid old ,russian1 the immortal ,koutousoff1 had felt the pulse of his nation1 and he was confident1 while all the other chiefs felt as though the earth were rocking under them4 ,the time for the extinction of ,russia had not come2 a throb of fierce emotion passed over the country2 the people rose like one man1 and the despot found himself held in check by rude masses of men for whom death had scant terrors4 ,koutousoff had a mighty people to support him1 and he would have swept back the horde of spoilers1 even if the winter had not come to his aid4 ,russia was but a dark country then1 as now1 but the conduct of the myriads who dared to die gave a bright presage for the future4 ,who can blame the multitudes of ,muscovites who sealed their wild protest with their blood8 ,the common soldiers were but slaves1 yet they would have suffered a degradation worse than slavery had they succumbed1 while1 as to the immense body of people--that nation within a nation--which answered to our upper and middle classes1 they would have tasted the same woes which at length drove ,germany to frenzy and made simple burghers prefer bitter death to the tyranny of the ,french4 ,the rulers of ,russia have stained her records foully since the days of #ahab1 but their worst sins cannot blot out the memory of the national uprising4 ,years are but trivial2 seventy-six of them seem a long time2 but those who study history broadly know that the dawn of a better future for ,russia showed its first gleam when the aroused and indignant race rose and went forward to die before the ,french cannon4 ,when next ,russia rises1 it will be against a tyranny only second to ,napoleon's in virulence--it will be against the terror that rules her now from within2 and her success will be applauded by the world4 ,the ,italians1 who first waited and plotted1 and then fought desperately under ,garibaldi1 had every reason to cry out for freedom4 ,if they had remained merely whimpering under the ,bourbon and ,austrian whips1 they would have deserved to be spurned by all who bear the hearts of men4 ,they were denied the meanest privileges of humanity2 they lived in a fashion which was rather like the violent1 oppressed1 hideous existence which men imagine in evil dreams1 and at length they struck1 and declared for liberty or annihilation4 ,perhaps they did not gain much in the way of immediate material good1 but that only makes their splendid movement the more admirable4 ,they fought for a magnificent idea1 and even now1 though the populace have to bear a taxation three times as great as any known before in their history1 the ordinary ,italian will say1 ,yes1 signor--the taxes are very heavy2 we toil very hard and pay much money2 but who counts money8 ,we are a nation now--a real nation2 ,italy is united and free4 ,that is the gist of the matter4 ,the people were bitterly ground down1 and they are content to suffer privation in the present so long as they can ensure freedom from alien rule in the future4 ,nothing that the most hardly-entreated ,briton suffers in any circumstances could equal the agonies of degradation borne by the people of the ,peninsula1 and their emancipation was hailed as if it had been a personal benefaction by all that was wisest and best in ,european society4 ,the millions who turned out to welcome ,garibaldi as if he had been an adored sovereign all had a true appreciation of real liberty2 the masses were right in their instinct1 and it was left for hysterical thinkers to shriek their deluded ideas in these later days4 ,but surely the ,irish rose for freedom in #afda8 ,i can almost imagine some clever correspondent asking me that question with a view to taking me in a neat trap4 ,it is true enough that the ,irish rose2 but here again we must learn to discriminate between cases4 ,how did the wild folk rise8 ,did they go out like the ,thousand of ,marsala and pit themselves against odds of five and six to one8 ,did they show any chivalry8 ,alas for the wicked story6 ,the rebels behaved like cruel wild beasts2 they were worse than polecats in an aviary1 and they met with about the same resistance as the polecats would meet4 ,they stripped the ,ulster farmers and their families naked1 and sent them out in the bitter weather2 they hung on the skirts of the agonized crowd2 the men cut down the refugees wholesale1 and even the little boys of the insurgent party were taught to torture and kill the unhappy children of the flying farmers4 ,poor little infants fell in the rear of the doomed host1 but no mother was allowed to succour her dying offspring1 and the innocents expired in unimaginable suffering4 ,the stripped fugitives crowded into ,dublin1 and there the plague carried them off wholesale4 ,the rebels had gained liberty with a vengeance1 and they had their way for ten years and more4 ,their liberty was degraded by savagery2 they ruled ,ireland at their own sweet will2 they dwelt in anarchy until the burden of their iniquity grew too grievous for the earth to bear4 ,then their villainous freedom was suddenly ended by no less a person than ,oliver ,cromwell1 and the curses1 the murders1 the unspeakable vileness of ten bad years all were atoned for in wild wrath and ruin4 ,now is it not marvellous that1 while the murderers were free1 they were poverty-stricken and most wretched8 ,as soon as ,cromwell's voice had ceased to pronounce the doom on the unworthy1 the great man began his work of regeneration2 and under his iron hand the country which had been miserable in freedom became prosperous1 happy1 and contented4 ,there is no mistaking the facts1 for men of all parties swore that the six years which followed the storm of ,drogheda were the best in all ,ireland's history4 ,had ,cromwell only lived longer1 or had there been a man fit to follow him1 then ,england and ,ireland would be happier this day4 ,in our social life the same conditions hold for the individual as hold for nations in the assembly of the world's peoples4 ,freedom--true freedom--means liberty to live a beneficent and innocent life4 ,as soon as an individual chooses to set up as a law to himself1 then we have a right--nay1 it is our bounden duty--to examine his pretensions4 ,if the sense of the wisest in our community declares him unfit to issue dicta for the guidance of men1 then we must promptly suppress him2 if we do not1 our misfortunes are on our own heads4 ,the independent man may cry out about liberty and the rest as much as he likes1 but we cannot afford to heed him4 ,we simply say1 ,you foolish person1 liberty1 as you are pleased to call it1 would be poison to you4 ,the best medicines for your uneasy mind are reproof and restraint2 if those fail to act on you1 then we must try what the lash will do for you4 ,let us have liberty for the wise and the good--we know them well enough when we see them2 and no sophist dare in his heart declare that any charlatan ever mastered men permanently4 ,liberty for the wise and good--yes1 and wholesome discipline for the foolish and froward--sagacious guidance for all4 ,of course1 if a man or a community is unable to choose a guide of the right sort1 then that man or community is doomed1 and we need say no more of either4 ,i keep warily out of the muddy conflict of politics2 but ,i will say that the cries of certain apostles of liberty seem woful and foolish4 ,unhappy shriekers1 whither do they fancy they are bound8 ,is it to some ,land of ,beulah1 where they may gambol unrestrained on pleasant hills8 ,the shriekers are all wrong1 and the best friend of theirs1 the best friend of humanity1 is he who will teach them--sternly if need be--that liberty and license are two widely different things4 ,august1 #ahhh4 ,,equality4 ,one of the strangest shocks which the ,british traveller can experience occurs to him when he makes his first acquaintance with the ,american servant--especially the male servant4 ,the quiet domineering ,european is stung out of his impassivity by a sort of moral stab which disturbs every faculty1 unless he is absolutely stunned and left gasping4 ,in ,england1 the quiet club servant waits with dignity and reserve1 but he is obedient to the last degree1 and his civility reaches the point of absolute polish4 ,when he performs a service his air is impassive1 but if he is addressed his face assumes a quietly good-humoured expression1 and he contrives to make his temporary employer feel as though it was a pleasure to attend upon him4 ,all over our country we find that politeness between employer and servant is mutual4 ,here and there we find a well-dressed ruffian who thinks he is doing a clever thing when he bullies a servant2 but a gentleman is always considerate1 quiet1 respectful2 and he expects consideration1 quietness1 and respect from those who wait upon him4 ,the light-footed1 cheerful young women who serve in hotels and private houses are nearly always charmingly kind and obliging without ever descending to familiarity2 in fact1 ,i believe that1 if ,england be taken all round1 it will be found that female post-office clerks are the only servants who are positively offensive4 ,they are spoiled by the hurried1 captious1 tiresome persons who haunt post-offices at all hours1 and in self-defence they are apt to convert themselves into moral analogues of the fretful porcupine4 ,perhaps the queenly dames in railway refreshment-rooms are almost equal to the post-office damsels2 but both classes are growing more good-natured--thanks to ,charles ,dickens1 ,mr4 ,sullivan1 and ,mr4 ,punch4 ,but the ,american servant exhibits no such weakness as civility2 he is resolved to let you know that you are in the country of equality1 and1 in order to do that effectually1 he treats you as a grovelling inferior4 ,you ask a civil question1 and he flings his answer at you as he would fling a bone at a dog4 ,every act of service which he performs comes most ungraciously from him1 and he usually contrives to let you plainly see two things--first1 he is ashamed of his position2 secondly1 he means to take a sort of indirect revenge on you in order to salve his lacerated dignity4 ,a young ,english peer happened to ask a ,chicago servant to clean a pair of boots1 and his tone of command was rather pronounced and definite4 ,that young patrician began to doubt his own identity when he was thus addressed--,ketch on and do them yourself6 ,there was no redress1 no possible remedy1 and finally our compatriot humbled himself to a negro1 and paid an exorbitant price for his polish4 ,here we have an absurdity quite fairly exposed4 ,the young ,american student who acts as a reporter or waiter during his college vacation is nearly always a respectful gentleman who neither takes nor allows a liberty2 but the underbred boor1 keen as he is about his gratuities1 will take even your gifts as though he were an ,asiatic potentate1 and the traveller a passing slave whose tribute is condescendingly received4 ,in a word1 the servant goes out of his way to prove that1 in his own idea1 he is quite fit to be anybody's master4 ,the ,declaration of ,independence informs us that all men are born equal2 the transatlantic servant takes that with a certain reservation1 for he implies that1 though men may be equal in a general way1 yet1 so far as he is concerned1 he prefers to reckon himself the superior of anybody with whom business brings him into contact4 ,it was in ,america that ,i first began to meditate on the problem of equality1 and ,i have given it much thought at intervals during several years4 ,the great difficulty is to avoid repeating stale commonplaces on the matter4 ,the robust ,briton bellows1 ,equality6 ,divide up all the property in the world equally among the inhabitants1 and there would be rich and poor1 just as before1 within a week6 ,the robust man thinks that settles the whole matter at once4 ,then we have the stock story of the three practical communists who forced themselves upon the society of ,baron ,rothschild1 and explained their views at some length4 ,the ,baron said3 ,gentlemen1 ,i have made a little calculation1 and ,i find that1 if ,i divided my property equally among my fellow-citizens1 your share would be one florin each4 ,oblige me by accepting that sum at once1 and permit me to wish you good-morning4 ,this was very neat in its way1 but ,i want to talk just a little more seriously of a problem which concerns the daily life of us all1 and affects our mental health1 our placidity1 and our self-respect very intimately4 ,in the first place1 we have to consider the deplorable exhibitions made by poor humanity whenever equality has been fairly insisted on in any community4 ,the ,frenchmen of #agib thought that a great principle had been asserted when the ,president of the ,convention said to the king1 ,you may sit down1 ,louis4 ,it seemed fine to the gallery when the queenly ,marie ,antoinette was addressed as the widow ,capet2 but what a poor business it was after all6 ,the howling familiarity of the mob never touched the real dignity of the royal woman1 and their brutality was only a murderous form of ,yankee servant's mean independence4 ,i cannot treat the subject at all without going into necessary subtleties which never occurred to an enraged mob or a bloodthirsty and insolent official2 ,i cannot accept the bald jeers of a comfortable1 purse-proud citizen as being of any weight1 and ,i am just as loath to heed the wire-drawn platitudes of the average philosopher4 ,if we accept the very first maxim of biology1 and agree that no two individuals of any living species are exactly alike1 we have a starting-point from which we can proceed to argue sensibly4 ,we may pass over the countless millions of inequalities which we observe in the lower orders of living things3 and there is no need to emphasize distinctions which are plain to every child4 ,when we come to speak of the race of men we reach the only concern which has a passionate and vital interest for us2 even the amazing researches and conclusions of the naturalists have no attraction for us unless they throw a light1 no matter how oblique1 on our mysterious being and our mysterious fate4 ,the law which regulates the differentiation of species applies with especial significance when we consider the birth of human individuals2 the law which ordains that out of countless millions of animalculae which once shed their remains on the floor of the deep sea1 or that now swarm in any pond1 there shall be no two alike1 holds accurately for the myriads of men who are born and pass away4 ,the type is the same2 there are fixed resemblances1 but exact similarity never4 ,the struggle for existence1 no matter what direction it may take1 always ends in the singling out of individuals who1 in some respect or other1 are worthy to survive1 while the weak perish and the elements of their bodies go to form new individuals4 ,it soon becomes plain that the crazy cry for equality is really only a weak protest against the hardships of the battle for existence4 ,the brutes have not attained to our complexity of brain2 ideas are only rudimentary with them1 and they decide the question of superiority by rude methods4 ,two lions fight until one is laid low2 the lioness looks calmly on until the little problem of superiority is settled1 and then she goes off with the victor4 ,the horses on the ,pampas have their set battles until one has asserted his mastery over the herd1 and then the defeated ones cower away abjectly1 and submit themselves meekly to their lord4 ,all the male animals are given to issuing challenges in a very self-assertive manner1 and the object is the same in every case4 ,but we are far above the brutes2 we have that mysterious1 immaterial ally of the body1 and our struggles are settled amid bewildering refinements and subtleties and restrictions4 ,in one quarter1 power of the soul gives its possessor dominion2 in another1 only the force of the body is of any avail4 ,if we observe the struggles of savages1 we see that the idea of equality never occurs to half-developed men2 the chief is the strong man1 and his authority can be maintained only by strength or by the influence that strength gives4 ,as the brute dies out of man1 the conditions of life's warfare become so complex that no one living could frame a generalization without finding himself at once faced by a million of exceptions that seem to negative his rule4 ,who was the most powerful man in ,england in ,queen ,anne's day8 ,marlborough was an unmatched fighter2 ,bolingbroke was an imaginative and masterful statesman2 there were thousands of able and strong warriors2 but the one who was the most respected and feared was that tiny cripple whose life was a long disease4 ,alexander ,pope was as frail a creature as ever managed to support existence2 he rarely had a moment free from pain2 he was so crooked and aborted that a good-hearted woman like ,lady ,mary ,wortley ,montagu was surprised into a sudden fit of laughter when he proposed marriage to her4 ,yet how he was feared6 ,the only one who could match him was that raging giant who wrote ,gulliver1 and the two men wielded an essential power greater than that of the ,first ,minister4 ,the terrible ,atossa1 ,sarah1 ,duchess of ,marlborough1 shrank from contact with ,pope1 while for a long time the ablest men of the political sets approached ,swift like lackeys4 ,one power was made manifest by the waspish verse-maker and the powerful satirist1 and each was acknowledged as a sort of monarch4 ,it would be like playing at paradoxes if ,i went on to adduce many mysteries and contradictions that strike us when we consider man's dominion over man4 ,we can only come to the same conclusion if we bring forward a million of instances2 we can only see that the whole human race1 individual by individual1 are separated one from the other by differences more or less minute1 and wherever two human beings are placed together one must inevitably begin to assert mastery over the other4 ,the method of self-assertion may be that of the athlete1 or that of the intriguer1 or that of the clear-sighted over the purblind1 or that of the subtle over the simple2 it matters not1 the effort for mastery may be made either roughly or gently1 or subtly1 or even clownishly1 but made it will be4 ,would it not be better to cease babbling of equality altogether1 and to try to accept the laws of life with some submission8 ,the mistake of rabid theorists lies in their supposition that the assertion of superiority by one person necessarily inflicts wrong on another1 whereas it is only the mastery obtained by certain men over others that makes the life of the civilized human creature bearable4 ,the very servant who is insolent while performing his duty only dares to exhibit rudeness because he is sure of protection by law4 ,all men are equal before the law4 ,yes--but how was the recognition of equality enforced8 ,simply by the power of the strong4 ,no monarch in the world would venture to deal out such measure to our rude servitor as was dealt by ,clovis to one of his men4 ,the king regarded himself as being affronted by his soldier1 and he wiped out the affront to his own satisfaction by splitting his follower's head in twain4 ,but the civilized man is secured by a bulwark of legality built up by strong hands1 and manned1 like the great ,roman walls1 by powerful legionaries of the law4 ,in this law of ,england1 if a peer and a peasant fight out a cause the peer has the advantage of the strength given by accumulated wealth--that is one example of our multifarious complexities2 but the judge is stronger than either litigant1 and it is the inequality personified by the judge that makes the safety of the peasant4 ,in our ordered state1 the strong have forced themselves into positions of power2 they have decided that the coarseness of brutish conflict is not to be permitted1 and one ruling agency is established which rests on force1 and force alone1 but which uses or permits the use of force only in cases of extremity4 ,we know that the foundation of all law is martial law1 or pure force2 we know that when a judge says1 ,you shall be hanged1 the convict feels resistance useless1 for behind the ushers and warders and turnkeys there are the steel and bullet of the soldier4 ,thus it appears that even in the sanctuary of equality--in the law court--the life and efficiency of the place depend on the assertion of one superior strength--that is1 on the assertion of inequality4 ,if we choose to address each other as ,citizen1 or play any fooleries of that kind1 we make no difference4 ,citizen ,jourdain may go out equipped in complete carmagnole1 and he may refuse to doff his red cap to any dignitary breathing2 but all the while ,citizen ,barras is wielding the real power1 and ,citizen ,buonaparte is awaiting his turn in the background4 ,all the swagger of equality will avail nothing when ,citizen ,buonaparte gets his chance2 and the very men who talked loudest about the reign of equality are the most ready to bow down and worship the strong4 ,instead of ostentatiously proclaiming that one man is as good as another--and better1 we should devote ourselves to finding out who are our real superiors4 ,when the true man is found he will not stand upon petty forms2 and no one will demand such punctilios of him4 ,he will treat his brethren as beings to be aided and directed1 he will use his strength and his wisdom as gifts for which he must render an account1 and the trivialities of etiquette will count as nothing4 ,when the street orator yells1 ,who is our ruler8 ,is he not flesh and blood like us8 ,are not many of us above him8 he may possibly be stating truth4 ,it would have been hard to find any street-lounger more despicable than ,bomba or more foolish than poor ,louis ,,xvi2 but the method of oratory is purely destructive1 and it will be much more to the purpose if the street firebrand gives his audience some definite ideas as to the man who ought to be chosen as leader4 ,if we have the faculty for recognizing our best man1 all chatter about equalities and inequalities must soon drop into silence4 ,when the ragged ,suwarrow went about among his men and talked bluffly with the raw recruits1 there was no question of equality in any squad1 for the tattered1 begrimed man had approved himself the wisest1 most audacious1 and most king-like of all the host2 and he could afford to despise appearances4 ,no soldier ventured to think of taking a liberty2 every man reverenced the rough leader who could think and plan and dare4 ,frederick wandered among the camp-fires at night1 and sat down with one group after another of his men4 ,he never dreamed of equality1 nor did the rude soldiers4 ,the king was greatest2 the men were his comrades1 and all were bound to serve the ,fatherland--the sovereign by offering sage guidance1 the men by following to the death4 ,no company of men ever yet did worthy work in the world when the notion of equality was tried in practice2 and no kind of effort1 for evil or for good1 ever came to anything so long as those who tried did not recognize the rule of the strongest or wisest4 ,even the scoundrel buccaneers of the ,spanish ,main could not carry on their fiendish trade without sinking the notion of equality1 and the simple ,quakers1 the ,society of ,friends1 with all their straitened ideas1 have been constantly compelled to recognize one head of their body1 even though they gave him no distinctive title4 ,our business is to see that every man has his due as far as possible1 and not more than his due4 ,the superior must perceive what is the degree of deference which must be rendered to the inferior2 the inferior must put away envy and covetousness1 and must learn to bestow1 without servility1 reverence and obedience where reverence and obedience may be rightfully offered4 ,august1 #ahhh4 ,,fraternity4 ,so far as we can see it appears plain that the wish for brotherhood was on the whole reasonable1 and its fulfilment easier than the wild desire for liberty and equality4 ,no doubt ,omar and ,cromwell and ,hoche and ,dumouriez have chosen in their respective times an odd mode of spreading the blessings of fraternity4 ,it is a little harsh to say to a man1 ,be my brother or ,i will cut your head off2 but we fear that men of the stamp of ,mahomet1 ,cromwell1 and the ,french ,jacobins were given to offering a choice of the alternatives named4 ,perhaps we may be safe if we take the roughness of the mere proselytizers as an evidence of defective education2 they had a dim perception of a beautiful principle1 but they knew of no instrument with which they could carry conviction save the sword4 ,we1 with our better light1 can well understand that brotherhood should be fostered among men2 we are all children of one ,father1 and it is fitting that we should reverently acknowledge the universal family tie4 ,the ,founder of our religion was the earliest preacher of the divine gospel of pity1 and it is to ,him that we owe the loveliest and purest conception of brotherhood4 ,he claimed to be the ,brother of us all2 ,he showed how we should treat our brethren1 and ,he carried ,his teaching on to the very close of ,his life4 ,so far from talking puerilities about equality1 we should all see that there are degrees in our vast family2 the elder and stronger brethren are bound to succour the younger and weaker2 the young must look up to their elders2 and the ,father of all will perhaps preserve peace among us if we only forget our petty selves and look to ,him4 ,alas1 it is so hard to forget self6 ,the dullest of us can see how excellent and divine is brotherhood1 if we do assuredly carry out the conception of fraternity thoroughly2 but again ,i say1 ,how hard it is to banish self and follow the teaching of our divine ,brother6 ,if we cast our eyes over the world now1 we may see--perhaps indistinctly--things that might make us weep1 were it not that we must needs smile at the childish ways of men4 ,in the very nation that first chose to put forward the word fraternity as one of the symbols for which men might die we see a strange spectacle4 ,half that nation is brooding incessantly on revenge2 half the nation is bent only on slaying certain brother human beings who happen to live on the north and east of a certain river instead of on the south and west4 ,the home of the solacing doctrine of fraternity is also the home of incessant preparations for murder1 rapine1 bitter and brutal vengeance4 ,about a million of men rise every morning and spend the whole day in practising so that they may learn to kill people cleverly2 hideous instruments1 which must cause devastation1 torture1 bereavement1 and wreck1 should they ever be used in earnest1 are lovingly handled by men who hope to see blood flow before long4 ,the ,frenchman cannot yet venture to smite his ,teutonic brother1 but he will do so when he has the chance2 and thus two bands of brethren1 who might have dwelt together amicably1 may shortly end by inflicting untold agonies on each other4 ,both nations which so savagely await the beginning of a mad struggle are supposed to be followers of the ,brother whose sweet message is read and repeated by nearly all the men who live on our continent1 yet they only utter bitter words and think sullen thoughts1 while the more acrid of the two adversaries is the country which once inscribed ,brotherhood on its very banners4 ,all round the arena wherein the two great peoples defy each other the nations wait anxiously for the delivery of the first stroke that shall give the signal for wrath and woe2 and1 strangely1 no one can tell which of the onlookers is the more fervent professor of our ,master's faith4 ,let brotherly love continue6--that was the behest laid on us all2 and we manifest our brotherly love by invoking the spirit of murder4 ,we know what exquisite visions floated around the twelve who first founded the ,church on the principle of fraternity4 ,no brother was to be left poor2 all were to hold goods in common2 every man should work for what he could1 and receive what he needed2 but evil crept in1 and dissension and heart-burning1 and ever since then the best of our poor besotted human race have been groping blindly after fraternity and finding it never4 ,i always deprecate bitter or despondent views1 or exaggerating the importance of our feeble race--for1 after all1 the whole time during which man has existed on earth is but as a brief swallow-flight compared with the abysmal stretches of eternity2 but ,i confess that1 when ,i see the flower of our race trained to become killers of men and awaiting the opportunity to exercise their murderous arts ,i feel a little sick at heart4 ,even they are compelled to hear the commands of the lovely gospel of fraternity1 and1 unless they die quickly in the fury of combat1 their last moments are spent in listening to the same blessed words4 ,it seems so mad and dreamlike that ,i have found myself thinking that1 despite all our confidence1 the world may be but a phantasmagoria1 and ourselves1 with our flesh that seems so solid1 may be no more than fleeting wraiths4 ,there is no one to rush between the scowling nations1 as the poor hermit did between the gladiators in wicked ,rome2 there is no one to say1 ,poor1 silly peasant from pleasant ,france1 why should you care to stab and torment that other poor flaxen-haired simpleton from ,silesia8 ,your fields await you2 if you were left to yourselves1 then you and the ,silesian would be brothers1 worshipping like trusting children before the common ,father of us all4 ,and now you can find nothing better to do than to do each other to death6 ,like the sanguine creatures who carried out the revolutionary movements of #aghi1 #ahcj1 #ahdh1 and #ahfj1 the weak among us are apt to cry out--,surely the time of fraternity has come at last6 ,then1 when the murderous ,empire1 or the equally murderous ,republic1 or the grim military despotism arrives instead of fraternity1 the weak ones are smitten with confusion4 ,i pity them1 for a bitterness almost as of death must be lived through before one learns that ,god indeed doeth all things well4 ,the poor ,revolutionists thought that they must have rapid changes1 and their hysterical visions appeared to them like perfectly wise and accurate glances into the future4 ,they were in a hurry1 forgetting that we cannot change our marvellous society on a sudden1 any more than we can change a single tissue of our bodies on a sudden--hence their frantic hopes and frantic despair4 ,if we gaze coolly round1 we see that1 in spite of a muttering1 threatening ,france and a watchful ,germany1 in spite of the huge ,russian storm-cloud that lowers heavily over ,europe1 in spite of the venomous intrigues with which ,austria is accredited1 there are still cheerful symptoms to be seen1 and it may happen that the very horror of war may at last drive all men to reject it1 and declare for fraternity4 ,look at that very ,france which is now so electric with passion and suspicion1 and compare it with the ,france of long ago4 ,the ,gaul now thinks of killing the ,teuton2 but in the time of the good ,king ,henry ,,iv4 he delighted in slaying his brother ,gaul4 ,the race who now only care to turn their hands against a rival nation once fought among themselves like starving rats in a pit4 ,even in the most polished society the men used to pick quarrels to fight to the death4 ,in one year of ,king ,henry's reign nine thousand ,french gentlemen were killed in duels6 ,bad as we are1 we are not likely to return to such a state of things as then was seen4 ,the men belonged to one nation1 and they ought to have banded together so that no foreign foe might take advantage of them2 and yet they chose rather to slaughter each other at the rate of nearly one hundred and ninety per week4 ,certainly1 so far as ,france is concerned1 we can see some improvement2 for1 although the cowardly and abominable practice of duelling is still kept up1 only one man was killed during the past twelve months1 instead of nine thousand4 ,in ,england we have had nearly two hundred years of truce from civil wars2 in ,germany the sections of the populace have at any rate stopped fighting among themselves2 in ,italy there are no longer the shameful feuds of ,guelf and ,ghibelline4 ,it would seem1 then1 that civil strife is passing away1 and that countries which were once the prey of bloodthirsty contending factions are now at least peaceful within their own borders4 ,if we reason from small things to great1 we see that the squabbling nests of murderers1 or would-be murderers1 who peopled ,france1 ,england1 ,germany1 ,austria1 and ,italy have given way to compact nations which enjoy unbroken internal peace4 ,the struggles of business go on2 the weak are trampled under foot in the mad rush of the cities of men1 but the actual infliction of pain and death is not now dreamed of by ,frenchman against ,frenchman or ,german against ,german4 ,we must remember that there never was so deadly and murderous a spirit displayed as during the ,thirty ,years' ,war1 and yet the peoples who then wrestled and throttled each other are now peaceful under the same yoke4 ,may we not trust that a time will come when nations will see on a sudden the blank folly of making war8 ,day by day the pressure of armaments is growing greater1 and we may almost hope that the very fiendish nature of modern weapons may bring about a blessed reductio ad absurdum1 and leave war as a thing ludicrous1 and not to be contemplated by sane men6 ,i find one gun specially advertised in our ,christian country1 and warranted to kill as many men in one minute as two companies of infantry could in five6 ,what will be the effect of the general introduction of this delightful weapon8 ,no force can possibly stand before it2 no armour or works can keep out the hail of its bullets4 ,supposing1 then1 that benevolent science goes on improving the means of slaughter1 must there not come a time when people will utterly refuse to continue the mad and miserable folly of war8 ,over the whole of ,britain we may find even now the marks of cannon-shot discharged by ,englishmen against the castles of other ,englishmen4 ,is there one man in ,britain who can at this present moment bring his imagination to conceive such an occurrence as an artillery fight between bodies of ,englishmen8 ,it is almost too absurd to be named even as a casual supposition4 ,so far has fraternity spread4 ,now1 if we go on perfecting dynamite shells which can destroy one thousand men by one explosion2 if we increase the range of our guns from twelve miles to twenty1 and fight our pieces according to directions signalled from a balloon1 we shall be going the very best way to make all men rise with one spasm of disgust1 and say1 ,no more of this6 ,we cannot hope to do away with evil speaking1 with verbal quarrelling1 with mean grasping of benefits from less fortunate brethren4 ,alas1 the reign of brotherhood will be long in eradicating the primeval combative instinct2 but1 when we compare the quiet urbanity of a modern gathering with the loud and senseless brawling which so often resulted from social assemblies even at the beginning of this century we may take some heart and hope on for the best4 ,our ,lord had a clear vision of a time when bitterness and evil-doing should cease1 and ,his words are more than a shadowy prediction4 ,the fact is that1 in striving gradually to introduce the third of the conditions of life craved by the poor feather-witted ,frenchmen1 the nations have a comparatively easy task4 ,we cannot have equality1 physical conditions having too much to do with giving the powers and accomplishments of men2 we can only claim liberty under the supreme guidance of our ,creator2 but fraternity is quite a possible consummation4 ,our greatest hero held it as the ,englishman's first duty to hate a ,frenchman as he hated the ,devil2 now that mad and cankered feeling has passed away1 and why should not the spread of common sense1 common honesty1 bring us at last to see that our fellow-man is better when regarded as a brother than as a possible assassin or thief8 ,our corporate life and progress as nations1 or even as a race of ,god's creatures1 is much like the life and progress of the individual4 ,the children of men stumble often1 fall often1 despair often1 and yet the great universal movement goes on1 and even the degeneracy which must always go on side by side with progress does not appreciably stay our advance4 ,the individual man cannot walk even twenty steps without actually saving himself by a balancing movement from twenty falls4 ,every step tends to become an ignominious tumble1 and yet our poor body may very easily move at the rate of four miles per hour1 and we gain our destinations daily4 ,the human race1 in spite of many slips1 will go on progressing towards good--that is1 towards kindness--that is1 towards fraternity--that is1 towards the gospel1 which at present seems so wildly and criminally neglected4 ,the mild and innocent ,anarcharsis ,clootz1 who made his way over the continent of ,europe1 and who came to our little island1 in his day always believed that the time for the federation of mankind would come4 ,poor fellow--he died under the murderous knife of the guillotine and did little to further his beautiful project6 ,he was esteemed a harmless lunatic2 yet1 notwithstanding the twelve millions of armed men who trample ,europe1 ,i do not think that ,clootz was quite a lunatic after all4 ,moreover1 all men know that right must prevail1 and they know also that there is not a human being on earth who does not believe by intuition that the gospel of brotherhood is right1 even as the life of its propounder was holy4 ,the way is weary toward the quarter where the rays of dawn will first break over the shoulder of the earth4 ,we walk on hoping1 and1 even if we fall by the way1 and all our hopes seem to be tardy of fruition1 yet others will hail the slow dawn of brotherhood when all now living are dead and still4 ,september1 #ahhh4 ,,little ,,wars4 ,just at this present our troops are engaged in fighting various savage tribes in various parts of the world1 and the humorous journalist speaks of the affairs as little wars4 ,there is something rather gruesome in this airy flippancy proceeding from comfortable gentlemen who are in nice studies at home4 ,the ,burmese force fights1 marches1 toils in an atmosphere which would cause some of the airy critics to faint2 the ,thibetan force must do as much climbing as would satisfy the average ,alpine performer2 and all the soldiers carry their lives in their hands4 ,what is a little war8 ,is any war little to a man who loses his life in it8 ,i imagine that when a wounded fighter comes to face his last hour he regards the particular war in which he is engaged as quite the most momentous affair in the world so far as he is concerned4 ,to me the whole spectacle of the little wars is most grave1 both as regards the nation and as regards the individual ,britons who must suffer and fall4 ,our destiny is heavy upon us2 we must dree our weirde1 for we have begun walking on the road of conquest1 and we must go forward or die4 ,the man who has the wolf by the ears cannot let go his hold2 we cannot slacken our grip on anything that once we have clutched4 ,but it is terrible to see how we are bleeding at the extremities4 ,i cannot give the figures detailing our losses in little wars during the past forty years1 but they are far worse than we incurred in the world-shaking fight of ,waterloo4 ,incessantly the drip1 drip of national blood-shedding goes on1 and no end seems to be gained1 save the grim consciousness that we must suffer and never flinch4 ,the graves of our best and dearest--our hardy loved ones--are scattered over the ends of the earth1 and the little wars are answerable for all4 ,england1 in her blundering1 half-articulate fashion1 answers1 ,yes1 they had to die2 their mother asked for their blood1 and they gave it4 ,so then from scores of punctures the life-blood of the mother of nations drops1 and each new bloodshed leads to yet further bloodshed1 until the deadly series looks endless4 ,we sent ,burnes to ,cabul1 and we betrayed him in the most dastardly way by the mouth of a ,minister4 ,england1 the great mother1 was not answerable for that most unholy of crimes2 it was the talking men1 the glib ,parliament cowards4 ,burnes was cut to pieces and an army lost4 ,crime brings forth crime1 and thus we had to butcher more ,afghans4 ,every inch of ,india has been bought in the same way2 one war wins territory which must be secured by another war1 and thus the inexorable game is played on4 ,in ,africa we have fared in the same way1 and thus from many veins the red stream is drained1 and yet the proud heart of the mother continues to beat strongly4 ,it is so hard for men to die2 it is as hard for the ,zulu and the ,afghan and the ,ghoorka as it is for the civilized man1 and that is why ,i wish it were ,britain's fortune to be allowed to cease from the shedding of blood4 ,if the corpses of the barbarians whom we have destroyed within the past ten years could only be laid out in any open space and shown to our populace1 there would be a shudder of horror felt through the country2 yet1 while the sweet bells chime to us about peace and goodwill1 we go on sending myriads of men out of life1 and the nation pays no more heed to that steady ruthless killing than it does to the slaughter of oxen4 ,alas6 ,then1 if we think of the lot of those who fight for us and slaughter our hapless enemies by deputy as it were1 their luck seems very hard4 ,when the steady lines moved up the ,alma slope and the men were dropping so fast1 the soldiers knew that they were performing their parts as in a vast theatre2 their country would learn the story of their deed1 and the feats of individuals would be amply recorded4 ,but1 when a man spends months in a far-off rocky country1 fighting day after day1 watching night after night1 and knowing that at any moment the bullet of a prowling ,ghilzai or ,afridi may strike him1 he has very little consolation indeed4 ,when one comes to think of the matter from the humorous point of view--though there is more grim fact than fun in it--it does seem odd that we should be compelled to spend two thousand pounds on an officer's education1 and then send him where he may be wiped out of the world in an instant by a savage little above the level of the ,bushman4 ,i pity the poor savages1 but ,i certainly pity the refined and highly-trained ,english soldier more4 ,the latest and most delightful of our ,anglo-,indians has put the matter admirably in verse which carries a sting even amidst its pathos4 ,he calls his verses ,arithmetic on the ,frontier4 ,a great and glorious thing it is ,to learn for seven years or so ,the ,lord knows what of that or this1 ,ere reckoned fit to face the foe1 ,the flying bullet down the pass1 ,that whistles clear1 ,all flesh is grass4 ,three hundred pounds per annum spent ,on making brain and body meeter ,for all the murderous intent ,comprised in villainous saltpetre6 ,and after--ask the ,yusufzaies ,what comes of all our 'ologies4 ,a scrimmage in a border station1 ,a canter down some dark defile-- ,two thousand pounds of education ,drops to a ten-rupee jezail6 ,the crammer's boast1 the squadron's pride ,shot like a rabbit in a ride4 ,no proposition ,euclid wrote1 ,no formulae the text-book know1 ,will turn the bullet from your coat ,or ward the tulwar's downward blow2 ,strike hard who cares--shoot straight who can-- ,the odds are on the cheaper man4 ,one sword-knot stolen from the camp ,will pay for all the school expenses ,of any ,kurrum ,valley scamp ,who knows no word of moods and tenses1 ,but1 being blessed with perfect sight1 ,picks off our messmates left and right4 ,with home-bred hordes the hillsides teem2 ,the troop-ships bring us one by one1 ,at vast expense of time and steam1 ,to slay ,afridis where they run4 ,the captives of our bow and spear ,are cheap1 alas1 as we are dear6 ,there is a world of meaning in those half-sad1 half-smiling lines1 and many an hour-long discourse might fail to throw more lurid light on one of the strangest historical problems in the world4 ,the flower of ,england's manhood must needs go2 and our most brilliant scholars1 our boldest riders1 our most perfect specimens of physical humanity drop like rabbits to the fire of half-naked savages6 ,the bright boy1 the hero of school and college1 the brisk1 active officer1 passes away into obscurity4 ,the mother weeps--perhaps some one nearer and dearer than all is stricken3 but the dead ,englishman's name vanishes from memory like a fleck of haze on the side of the valley where he sleeps4 ,england--cold1 inexorable1 indifferent--has other sons to take the dead man's place and perhaps share his obscurity2 and the doomed host of fair gallant youths moves forward ever in serried1 fearless lines towards the shadows4 ,that is what it costs to be a mighty nation4 ,it is sorrowful to think of the sacrificed men--sacrificed to fulfil ,england's imposing destiny2 it is sorrowful to think of the mourners who cannot even see their darling's grave2 yet there is something grandiose and almost morbidly impressive in the attitude of ,britain4 ,she waves her imperial hand and says1 ,see what my place in the world is6 ,my bravest1 my most skilful1 may die in a fight that is no more than a scuffling brawl2 they go down to the dust of death unknown1 but the others come on unflinching4 ,it is hard that ,i should part with my precious sons in mean warfare1 but the fates will have it so1 and ,i am equal to the call of fate4 ,thus the sovereign nation4 ,those who have no very pompous notions are willing to recognize the savage grandeur of our advance2 but ,i cannot help thinking of the lonely graves1 the rich lives squandered1 the reckless casting away of human life1 which are involved in carrying out our mysterious mission in the great peninsula4 ,our graves are spread thickly over the deadly plains2 our brightest and best toil and suffer and die1 and they have hardly so much as a stone to mark their sleeping-place2 our blood has watered those awful stretches from the ,himalayas to ,comorin1 and we may call ,hindostan the graveyard of ,britain's noblest4 ,people who see only the grizzled veterans who lounge away their days at ,cheltenham or ,brighton think that the fighting trade must be a very nice one after all4 ,to retire at fifty with a thousand a year is very pleasant no doubt2 but then every one of those war-worn gentlemen who returns to take his ease represents a score who have perished in fights as undignified as a street brawl4 ,more legions6 said ,varus2 ,more legions6 says ,england2 and our regiments depart without any man thinking of ,morituri te salittant6 ,yes2 that phrase might well be in the mind of every ,british man who fares down the ,red ,sea and enters the ,indian furnace4 ,those about to die1 salute thee1 ,o ,england1 our mother6 ,is it worth while8 ,sometimes ,i have my doubts4 ,moreover1 ,i never talk with one of our impassive1 masterful ,anglo-,indians without feeling sorry that their splendid capacities should be so often cast into darkness1 and their fame confined to the gossip of a clump of bungalows4 ,verily our little wars use up an immense quantity of raw material in the shape of intellect and power4 ,a man whose culture is far beyond that of the mouthing politicians at home and whose statesmanship is not to be compared to the ignorant crudities of the pigmies who strut and fret on the ,english party stage--this man spends great part of a lifetime in ruling and fighting2 he gives every force of a great intellect and will to his labours1 and he achieves definite and beneficent practical results2 yet his name is never mentioned in ,england1 and any vulgar vestryman would probably outweigh him in the eyes of the populace4 ,carlyle says that we should despise fame4 ,do your work1 observes the sage1 and never mind the rest4 ,when your duty is done1 no further concern rests with you4 ,and then the aged thinker goes on to snarl at puny creatures who are not content to be unknown4 ,well1 that is all very stoical and very grand1 and so forth2 but ,carlyle forgot human nature4 ,he himself raged and gnashed his teeth because the world neglected him1 and ,i must with every humility ask forgiveness of his manes if ,i express some commiseration for the unknown braves who perish in our little wars4 ,our callousness as individuals can hardly be called lordly1 though the results are majestic2 we accept supreme services1 and we accept the supreme sacrifice 7,skin for skin3 all that a man hath will he give for his life71 and we very rarely think fit to growl forth a chance word of thanks4 ,luckily our splendid men are not very importunate1 and most of them accept with silent humour the neglect which befalls them4 ,an old fighting general once remarked1 ,these fellows are in luck since the telegraph and the correspondents have been at work4 ,we weren't so fortunate in my day4 ,i went through the ,crimea and the ,mutiny1 and there was yet another affair in #ahfc that was hotter than either1 so far as close fighting and proportional losses of troops were concerned4 ,a force of three thousand was sent against the ,afghans1 and they never gave us much rest night or day4 ,they seemed determined to give their lives away1 and they wouldn't be denied4 ,i've seen them come on and grab at the muzzles of the rifles4 ,we did a lot of fighting behind rough breastworks1 but sometimes they would rush us then4 ,we lost thirty officers out of thirty-four before we were finished4 ,well1 when ,i came home and went about among the clubs1 the fellows used to say to me1 ',what was this affair of yours up in the hills8 ,we had no particulars except the fact that you were fighting4' ,and that expedition cost ten times as many men as your ,egyptian one1 besides causing six weeks of almost constant fighting2 yet not a newspaper had a word to say about it6 ,we never grumbled much--it was all in the day's work2 but it shows how men's luck varies4 ,there spoke the old fighter1 ,duty first1 and take your chance of the rest4 ,true2 but could not one almost wish that those forlorn heroes who saved our frontier from savage hordes might have gained just a little of that praise so dear to the frivolous mind of man8 ,it was not to be2 the dead men's bones have long ago sunk into the kindly earth1 the wind flows down the valleys1 and the fighters sleep in the unknown glens and on far-distant hillsides with no record save the curt clerk's mark in the regimental list--,dead4 ,when ,i hear the merry pressman chatting about little wars and proudly looking down on mere skirmishes1 ,i cannot restrain a movement of impatience4 ,are our few dead not to be considered because they were few8 ,supposing they had swarmed forward in some great battle of the ,west and died with thousands of others amid the hurricane music of hundreds of guns1 would the magnitude of the battle make any difference8 ,honour to those who risk life and limb for ,england2 honour to them1 whether they die amid loud battle or in the far-away dimness of a little war6 ,september1 #ahhh4 ,,the ,,british ,,festival4 ,again and again ,i have talked about the delights of leisure1 and ,i always advise worn worldlings to renew their youth and gain fresh ideas amid the blessed calm of the fields and the trees4 ,but ,i lately watched an immense procession of holiday-makers travelling mile after mile in long-drawn sequence--and the study caused me to have many thoughts4 ,there was no mistake about the intentions of the vast mob4 ,they started with a steadfast resolution to be jolly--and they kept to their resolution so long as they were coherent of mind4 ,it was a strange sight--a population probably equal to half that of ,scotland all plunged into a sort of delirium and nearly all forgetting the serious side of life4 ,as ,i gazed on the frantic assembly1 ,i wondered how the ,english ever came to be considered a grave solid nation2 ,i wondered1 moreover1 how a great percentage of men representing a nation of conquerors1 explorers1 administrators1 inventors1 should on a sudden decide to go mad for a day4 ,perhaps1 after all1 the catchword ,merry ,england meant really ,mad ,england2 perhaps the good days which men mourned for after the grim shade of ,puritanism came over the country were neither more nor less than periods of wild orgies2 perhaps we have reason to be thankful that the national carnivals do not now occur very often4 ,our ancestors had a very peculiar idea of what constituted a merry-making1 and there are many things in ancient art and literature which tempt us to fancy that a certain crudity distinguished the festivals of ancient days2 but still the latter-day frolic in all its monstrous proportions is not to be studied by a philosophic observer without profoundly moving thoughts arising4 ,as ,i gazed on the endless flow of travellers1 ,i could hardly help wondering how the mob would conduct themselves during any great social convulsion4 ,some gushing persons talk about the good humour and orderliness of the ,british crowd4 ,well1 ,i allow that the better class of holiday-makers exhibit a kind of rough good nature2 but1 whenever sport is in question1 we find that a certain class come to the front--a class who are not genial or merry1 but purely lawless4 ,while the huge carnival is in progress during one delirious day1 we have a chance of seeing in a mild form what would happen if a complete national disaster caused society to become fundamentally disordered4 ,the beasts of prey come forth from their lairs1 the most elementary rules of conduct are forgotten or bluntly disregarded1 and the law-abiding citizen may see robbery and violence carried on in broad daylight4 ,in some cases it happens that organized bands of thieves rob one man after another with a brutal effrontery which quite shames the minor abilities of ,macedonian or ,calabrian brigands4 ,forty or fifty consummate scoundrels work in concert2 and it often happens that even the betting-men are seized1 raised from the ground1 and shaken until their money falls and is scrambled for by eager rascaldom4 ,wherever there ,is sport the predatory animals flock together2 and ,i thought1 when last ,i saw the crew1 ,if a foreign army were in movement against ,england and a panic arose1 there would be little mercy for quiet citizens4 ,on a hasty computation1 ,i should say that an ordinary ,derby ,day brings together an army of wastrels and criminals strong enough to sack ,london if once the initial impetus were given2 and who can say what blind chance may supply that impetus even in our day8 ,there is not so much sheer foulness nowadays as there used to be2 the ,yahoo element--male and female--is not obtrusive2 and it is even possible for a lady to remain in certain quarters of the mighty ,downs without being offended in any way4 ,our grandfathers--and our fathers1 for that matter--had a somewhat acrid conception of humour1 and the offscourings of the city ministered to this peculiar humorous sense in a singular way4 ,but a leaven of propriety has now crept in1 and the evil beings who were wont to pollute the sweet air preserve some moderate measure of seemliness4 ,i am willing to welcome every sign of improving manners2 and yet ,i must say that the great ,british ,festival is a sorry and even horrible spectacle4 ,what is the net result or purpose of the whole display8 ,cheery scribes babble about ,isthmian games and the glorious air of the ,surrey hills1 and they try to put on a sort of jollity and semblance of well-being2 but the sham is a poor one1 and the laughing hypocrites know in their hearts that the vast gathering of people means merely waste1 idleness1 thievery1 villainy1 vice of all kinds--and there is next to no compensation for the horrors which are crowded together4 ,i would fain pick out anything good from the whole wild spectacle2 but ,i cannot1 and so give up the attempt with a sort of sick despair4 ,there is something rather pleasant in the sight of a merry lad who attends his first ,derby1 for he sees only the vivid rush and movement of crowds2 but to a seasoned observer and thinker the tremendous panorama gives suggestions only of evil4 ,i hardly have patience to consider the fulsome talk of the writers who print insincerities by the column year by year4 ,they know that the business is evil1 and yet they persist in speaking as if there were some magic influence in the reeking crowd which1 they declare1 gives health and tone to body and mind4 ,the dawdling parties who lunch on the ,hill derive no particular harm2 but then how they waste money and time6 ,plunderers of all sorts flourish in a species of blind whirl of knavery2 but no worthy person derives any good from the cruel waste of money and strength and energy4 ,the writers know all this1 and yet they go on turning out their sham cordiality1 sham congratulations1 sham justifications2 while any of us who know thoroughly the misery and mental death and ruin of souls brought on by racing and gambling are labelled as un-,english or churlish or something of the kind4 ,why should we be called churlish8 ,is it not true that a million of men and women waste a day on a pursuit which brings them into contact with filthy intemperance1 stupid debauch1 unspeakable coarseness8 ,the eruptive sportsman tells us that the sight of a good man on a good horse should stir every manly impulse in a ,briton4 ,what rubbish6 ,what manliness can there be in watching a poor baby-colt flogged along by a dwarf8 ,if one is placed at some distance from the course1 then one may find the glitter of the pretty silk jackets pleasing2 but1 should one chance to be near enough to see what is termed an exciting finish1 one's general conception of the manliness of racing may be modified4 ,from afar off the movement of the jockeys' whip-hands is no more suggestive than the movement of a windmill's sails2 but1 when one hears the flack1 flack of the whalebone and sees the wales rise on the dainty skin of the immature horse1 one does not feel quite joyous or manly4 ,i have seen a long lean creature reach back with his right leg and keep on jobbing with the spur for nearly four hundred yards of a swift finish2 ,i saw another manikin lash a good horse until the animal fairly curved its back in agony and writhed its head on one side so violently that the manly sporting-men called it an ungenerous brute4 ,where does the fun come in for the onlookers8 ,there is one good old thoroughbred which remembers a fearful flogging that he received twenty-two years ago2 if he hears the voice of the man who lashed him1 he sweats profusely1 and trembles so much that he is like to fall down4 ,how is the breed of horses directly improved by that kind of sport8 ,no2 the thousands of wastrels who squander the day and render themselves unsettled and idle for a week are not thinking of horses or of taking a healthy outing2 they are obeying an unhealthy gregarious instinct which in certain circumstances makes men show clear signs of acute mania4 ,if we look at the unadulterated absurdity of the affair1 we may almost be tempted to rage like ,carlyle or ,swift4 ,for weeks there are millions of people who talk of little else save the doings of useless dumb animals which can perform no work in the world and which at best are beautiful toys4 ,when the thoroughbreds actually engage in their contest1 there is no man of all the imposing multitude who can see them gallop for more than about thirty seconds2 the last rush home is seen only by the interesting mortals who are on the great stand2 and the entire performance which interests some persons for a year is all over in less than three minutes4 ,this is the game on which ,englishmen lavish wild hopes1 keen attention1 and good money--this is the sport of kings which gluts the pockets of greedy knaves6 ,a vast city--nay1 a vast empire--is partially disorganized for a day in order that some dwarfish boys may be seen flogging immature horses during a certain number of seconds1 and we learn that there is something ,english1 and even chivalrous1 in the foolish wastrel proceedings4 ,my conceptions of ,english virtues are probably rudimentary2 but ,i quite fail to discover where the nobility of horse-racing and racecourse picnicing appears4 ,my notion of nobility belongs to a bygone time2 and ,i was gratified by hearing of one very noble deed at the moment when the flashy howling mob were trooping forward to that great debauch which takes place around the ,derby racecourse4 ,a great steamer was flying over a ,southern sea1 and the sharks were showing their fins and prowling around with evil eyes4 ,the ,rimutaka spun on her way1 and all the ship's company were cheerful and careless4 ,suddenly a poor crazy woman sprang over the side and was drifted away by a surface-current2 while the irresistible rush of the steamer could not of course be easily stayed4 ,a good ,englishman--honour for ever to his name6--jumped into the water1 swam a quarter of a mile1 and1 by heaven's grace1 escaped the wicked sea-tigers and saved the unhappy distraught woman4 ,that man's name is ,cavell3 and ,i think of nobility in connection with him1 and not in connection with the manikins who rush over ,epsom ,downs4 ,i like to give a thought to the nobility of those men who guard and rule a mighty empire2 but ,i think very little of the creatures who merely consume food and remain at home in rascally security4 ,what a farce to talk of encouraging athletics6 ,the poor manikin who gets up on a racer is not an athlete in any rational sense of the term4 ,he is a wiry emaciated being whose little muscles are strung like whipcord2 but it is strange to dignify him as an athlete4 ,if he once rises above nine stone in weight1 his life becomes a sort of martyrdom2 but1 abstemious and self-contained as he is1 we can hardly give him the name which means so much to all healthy ,englishmen4 ,for some time each day the wondrous specimen of manhood must stew in a ,turkish bath or between blankets2 he tramps for miles daily if his feet keep sound2 he starts at five in the morning and perhaps rides a trial or two2 then he takes his weak tea and toast1 then exercise or sweating2 then comes his stinted meal2 and then he starves until night4 ,to call such a famished lean fellow a follower of noble sport is too much4 ,other ,british men deny themselves2 but then think of the circumstances6 ,far away among the sea of mountains on our ,indian frontier a gallant ,englishman remains in charge of his lonely station2 his ,pathans or ,ghoorkas are fine fellows1 and perhaps some brave old warrior will use the privilege of age and stroll in to chat respectfully to the ,sahib4 ,but it is all lonely--drearily lonely4 ,the mountain partridge may churr at sunrise and sundown2 the wily crows may play out their odd life-drama daily2 the mountain winds may rush roaring through the gullies until the village women say they can hear the hoofs of the brigadier's horse4 ,but what are these desert sounds and sights for the laboriously-cultured officer8 ,his nearest comrade is miles off2 his spirit must dwell alone4 ,and yet such men hang on at their dreary toil2 and who can ever hear them complain1 save in their semi-humorous letters to friends at home8 ,they often carry their lives in their hands2 but they can only hope to rest unknown if the chance goes against them4 ,i call those men noble4 ,there are no excited thousands for them to figure before2 they scarcely have the honour of mention in a despatch2 but they go on in grim silence1 working out their own destiny and the destiny of this colossal empire4 ,when ,i compare them with the bold sportsmen1 ,i feel something like disgust4 ,the real high-hearted heroes do not crave rewards--if they did1 they would reap very little4 ,the bold man who risked everything to save the ,calliope will never earn as much in a year as a horse-riding manikin can in two months4 ,that is the way we encourage our finest merit4 ,and meantime at the ,isthmian games the hordes of scoundreldom who dwell at ease can enjoy themselves to their hearts' content in their own dreadful way2 they break out in their usual riot of foulness2 they degrade the shape of man2 and the burly moralists look on robustly1 and say that it is good4 ,i never think of the great ,british carnival without feeling that the dregs of that ugly crowd will one day make history in a fashion which will set the world shuddering4 ,i have no pity for ruined gamblers2 but ,i am indignant when we see the worst of human kind luxuriating in abominable idleness and luxury on the foul fringe of the hateful racecourse4 ,no sumptuary law will ever make any inroad on the cruel evil2 and my feeling is one of sombre hopelessness4 ,july1 #ahhi4 ,,seasonable ,,nonsense4 ,the most hard-hearted of cynics must pity the poor daily journalist who is calmly requested nowadays to produce a ,christmas article4 ,for my own part ,i decline to meddle with holly and jollity and general goodwill1 and ,i have again and again protested against the insane ,beggars' ,carnival which breaks out yearly towards the beginning of ,december4 ,a man may be pleased enough to hear his neighbour express goodwill1 but he does not want his neighbour's hand held forth to grasp our ,western equivalent for backsheesh4 ,in ,egypt the screeching ,arabs make life miserable with their ceaseless dismal yell1 ,backsheesh1 ,howaji6 ,the average ,british citizen is also hailed with importunate cries which are none the less piercing and annoying from the fact that they are translated into black and white4 ,the ignoble frivolity of the swarming circulars1 the obvious insincerity of the newspaper appeals1 the house-to-house calls1 tend steadily to vulgarize an ancient and a beautiful institution1 and alienate the hearts of kindly people who do not happen to be abject simpletons4 ,the outbreak of kindness is sometimes genuine on the part of the donors2 but it is often merely surface-kindness1 and the gifts are bestowed in a bitter and grudging spirit4 ,let me ask1 ,what are the real feelings of a householder who is requested to hand out a present to a turncock or dustman whom he has never seen8 ,the functionaries receive fair wages for unskilled labour1 yet they come smirking cheerfully forward and prefer a claim which has no shadow of justification4 ,if a flower-seller is rather too importunate in offering her wares1 she is promptly imprisoned for seven days or fined2 if a costermonger halts for a few minutes in a thoroughfare and cries his goods1 his stock maybe confiscated2 yet the privileged ,christmas mendicant may actually proceed to insolence if his claims are ignored2 and the meek ,briton submits to the insult4 ,i cannot sufficiently deplore the progress of this spirit of beggardom1 for it is acting and reacting in every direction all over the country4 ,long ago we lamented the decay of manly independence among the fishermen of those ,east ,coast ports which have become watering-places4 ,big bearded fellows whose fathers would have stared indignantly at the offer of a gratuity are ready to hold out their hands and touch their caps to the most vulgar dandy that ever swaggered4 ,to any one who knew and loved the whole breed of seamen and fishermen1 a walk along ,yarmouth sands in ,september is among the most purely depressing experiences in life4 ,but the demoralization of the seaside population is not so distressing as that of the general population in great cities4 ,we all know ,adam ,bede--the very finest portrait of the old-fashioned workman ever done4 ,if ,george ,eliot had represented ,adam as touching his cap for a sixpence1 we should have gasped with surprise at the incongruity4 ,can we imagine an old-world stonemason like ,hugh ,miller begging coppers from a farmer on whose steading he happened to be employed8 ,the thing is preposterous6 ,but now a strong ,london artizan will coolly ask for his gratuity just as if he were a mere link-boy6 ,it is pleasant to turn to kindlier themes2 it is pleasant to think of the legitimate rejoicings and kindnesses in which the most staid of us may indulge4 ,far be it from me to emulate the crabbed person who proposed to form a ,society for the ,abolition of ,christmas4 ,the event to be commemorated is by far the greatest in the history of our planet2 all others become hardly worthy of mention when we think of it2 and nothing more momentous can happen until the last catastrophe1 when a chilled and tideless earth shall roll through space1 and when no memory shall remain of the petty creatures who for a brief moment disturbed its surface4 ,the might of the ,empire of ,rome brooded over the fairest portions of the known world1 and it seemed as though nothing could shake that colossal power2 the pettiest officer of the ,imperial staff was of more importance than all the natives of ,syria2 and yet we see that the fabric of ,roman rule has passed away like a vision1 while the faith taught by a band of poor ,syrian men has mastered the minds of the strongest nations in the world4 ,the poor disciples whom the ,master left became apostles2 footsore and weary they wandered--they were scorned and imprisoned and tortured until the last man of them had passed away4 ,their work has subdued princes and empires1 and the bells that ring out on ,christmas ,eve remind us not only of the most tremendous occurrence in history1 but of the deeds of a few humble souls who conquered the fear of death and who resigned the world in order that the children of the world might be made better4 ,a tremendous ,event truly6 ,we are far1 far away from the ideal1 it is true2 and some of us may feel a thrill of sick despair when we think of what the sects have done and what they have not done--it all seems so slow1 so hopeless1 and the powers of evil assert themselves ever and again with such hideous force4 ,some withdraw themselves to fierce isolation2 some remain in the world1 mocking the ways of men and treating all life as an ugly jest2 some refuse to think at all1 and drag themselves into oblivion2 while some take one frantic sudden step and leave the world altogether by help of bullet or bare bodkin4 ,a man of light mind who endeavoured to reconcile all the things suggested to him by the coming of ,christmas would probably become demented if he bent his entire intellect to solve the puzzles4 ,thousands--millions--of books have been written about the ,christian theology1 and half of ,european mankind cannot claim to have any fixed and certain belief which leads to right conduct4 ,some of the noblest and sweetest souls on earth have given way to chill hopelessness1 and only a very bold or a very thick-sighted man could blame them2 we must be tender towards all who are perplexed1 especially when we see how terrible are the reasons for perplexity4 ,nevertheless1 dark as the outlook may be in many directions1 men are slowly coming to see that the service of ,god is the destruction of enmity1 and that the religion of tenderness and pity alone can give happiness during our dark pilgrimage4 ,far back in last winter a man was forcing his way across a dreary marsh in the very teeth of a wind that seemed to catch his throat in an icy grip1 stopping the breath at intervals and chilling the very heart4 ,coldly the grey breakers rolled under the hard lowering sky2 coldly the western light flickered on the iron slopes of far-off hills2 coldly the last beams struck on the water and made chance wavelets flash with a terrible glitter4 ,the night rushed down1 and the snow descended fiercely2 the terrified cattle tried to find shelter from the scourge of the storm2 a hollow roar rang sullenly amid the darkness2 stray sea-birds far overhead called weirdly1 and it seemed as if the spirit of evil were abroad in the night4 ,in darkness the man fought onward1 thinking of the unhappy wretches who sometimes lie down on the snow and let the final numbness seize their hearts4 ,then came a friendly shout--then lights--and then the glow of warmth that filled a broad room with pleasantness4 ,all the night long the mad gusts tore at the walls and made them vibrate2 all night the terrible music rose into shrieks and died away in low moaning1 and ever the savage boom of the waves made a vast under-song4 ,then came visions of the mournful sea that we all know so well1 and the traveller thought of the honest fellows who must spend their ,christmas-time amid warring forces that make the works of man seem puny4 ,what a picture that is--,the ,toilers of the ,sea in ,winter6 ,christmas ,eve comes with no joyous jangling of bells2 the sun stoops to the sea1 glaring lividly through whirls of snow1 and the vessel roars through the water2 black billows rush on until their crests topple into ruin1 and then the boiling white water shines fitfully like some strange lambent flame2 the breeze sings hoarsely among the cordage2 the whole surface flood plunges on as if some immense cataract must soon appear after the rapids are passed4 ,every sea that the vessel shatters sends up a flying waterspout2 and the frost acts with amazing suddenness1 so that the spars1 the rigging1 and the deck gather layer after layer of ice4 ,supposing the vessel is employed in fishing1 then the men in the forecastle crouch round the little fire1 or shiver on their soaked beds1 and perhaps growl out a few words of more or less cheerful talk4 ,stay with the helmsman1 and you may know what the mystery and horror of utter gloom are really like4 ,there is danger everywhere--a sudden wave may burst the deck or heave the vessel down on her side2 a huge dim cloud may start shapelessly from the murk1 and1 before a word of warning can be uttered1 a great ship may crash into the labouring craft4 ,in that case hope is gone1 for the boat is bedded in a mass of ice and all the doomed seamen must take the deadly plunge to eternity4 ,ah1 think of this1 you who rest in the glow of beautiful homes6 ,then the morning--the grey desolation6 ,no words can fairly picture the utter cheerlessness of a wintry dawn at sea4 ,the bravest of men feel something like depression or are pursued by cruel apprehensions4 ,the solid masses of ice have gripped every block1 and the ropes will not run2 the gaunt masts stand up like pallid ghosts in the grey light1 and still the volleys of snow descend at intervals4 ,all the ships seem to be cowering away1 scared and beaten2 even the staunch sea-gulls have taken refuge in fields and quiet rivers2 and only the seamen have no escape4 ,the mournful red stretches of the ,asiatic deserts are wild enough1 but there are warmth and marvellous light1 and those who well know the moaning wastes say that their fascination sinks on the soul4 ,the wintry sea has no fascination--no consolation2 it is hungry1 inhospitable--sometimes horrible4 ,but even there ,christ walks the waters in spirit4 ,in an ordinary vessel the rudest seaman is made to think of the great day1 and1 even if he goes on grumbling and swearing on the morrow1 he is apt to be softened and slightly subdued for one day at least4 ,the fishermen on the wild ,north ,sea are cared for1 and merry scenes are to be witnessed even when landsmen might shudder in terror4 ,certain gallant craft1 like strong yachts1 glide about among the plunging smacks2 each of the yachts has a brave blue flag at the masthead1 and the vessels are laden with kindly tokens from thousands of gentle souls on shore4 ,surely there is no irreverence in saying that the ,master walks the waters to this day8 ,we ,britons must of course express some of our emotions by eating and drinking freely4 ,no political party can pretend to adjust the affairs of the ,empire until the best-advertised members have met together at a dinner-table2 no prominent man can be regarded as having achieved the highest work in politics1 or art1 or literature1 or histrionics1 until he has been delicately fed in company with a large number of brother mortals2 and no anniversary can possibly be celebrated without an immense consumption of eatables and drinkables4 ,the rough men of the ,north ,sea have the national instinct1 and their mode of recognizing the festive season is quite up to the national standard4 ,the ,north ,sea fisherman would not nowadays approve of the punch-bowls and ancient ale which ,dickens loved so much to praise1 for he is given to the most severe forms of abstinence2 but it is a noble sight when he proceeds to show what he can do in the way of ,christmas dining4 ,if he is one of the sharers in a parcel from on shore1 he is fortunate1 for he may possibly partake of a pudding which might be thrown over the masthead without remaining whole after its fall on deck2 but it matters little if he has no daintily-prepared provender4 ,jack ,fisherman seats himself on a box or on the floor of the cabin2 he produces his clasp-knife and prepares for action4 ,when his huge tin dish is piled with a miscellaneous assortment of edibles1 it presents a spectacle which might make all ,bath and ,matlock and ,royat and ,homburg shudder2 but the seaman1 despising the miserable luxuries of fork and spoon1 attacks the amazing conglomeration with enthusiasm4 ,his ,christmas pudding may resemble any geological formation that you like to name1 and it may be unaccountably allied with a perplexing maze of cabbage and potatoes--nothing matters4 ,christmas must be kept up1 and the vast lurches of the vessel from sea to sea do not at all disturb the fine equanimity of the fellows who are bent on solemnly testifying1 by gastronomic evidence1 to the loyalty with which ,christmas is celebrated among orthodox ,englishmen4 ,the poor lads toil hard1 live hard1 and they certainly feed hard2 but1 with all due respect1 it must be said also that they mostly pray hard2 and1 if any one of the cynical division had been among the seamen during that awful time five years ago1 he would have seen that among the sea-toilers at least the glad season is glad in something more than name--for the gladness is serious4 ,sights of the same kind may be seen on great ships that are careering over the myriad waterways that net the surface of the globe2 the smart man-of-war1 the great liner1 the slow deep-laden barque toiling wearily round the ,horn1 are all manned by crews that keep up the aged tradition more or less merrily2 and woe betide the cook that fails in his duty6 ,that lost man's fate may be left to the eye of imagination4 ,under the ,southern ,cross the fair summer weather glows2 but the good ,colonists have their little rejoicings without the orthodox adjuncts of snow and frozen fingers and iron roads4 ,far up in the bush the men remember to make some kind of rude attempt at improvising ,christmas rites1 and memories of the old country are present with many a good fellow who is facing his first hard luck4 ,but the climate makes no difference2 and1 apart from all religious considerations1 there is no social event that so draws together the sympathies of the whole ,english race all over the world4 ,at ,nainee ,tal1 or any other of our stations in our wondrous ,indian possession1 the day is kept4 ,alas1 how dreary it is for the hearts that are craving for home6 ,the moon rises through the majestic arch of the sky and makes the tamarisk-trees gorgeous2 the warm air flows gently2 the dancers float round to the wild waltz-rhythm2 and the imitation of home is kept up with zeal by the stout general1 the grave and scholarly judge1 the fresh subaltern1 and by all the bright ladies who are in exile4 ,but even these think of the quiet churches in sweet ,english places2 they think of the purple hedges1 the sharp scent of frost-bitten fields1 the glossy black ice1 and the hissing ring of the skates4 ,i know that1 religiously as ,christmas is kept up even on the frontier in ,india1 the toughest of the men long for home1 and pray for the time when the blessed regions of ,brighton and ,torquay and ,cheltenham may receive the worn pensioner4 ,one poet says something of the ,anglo-,indian's longing for home at ,christmas-time2 he speaks with melancholy of the folly of those who sell their brains for rupees and go into exile1 and he appears to be ready1 for his own part1 to give up his share in the glory of our ,empire if only he can see the friendly fields in chill ,december4 ,i sympathize with him4 ,away with the mendicants1 rich and poor--away with the gushing parasites who use a kindly instinct and a sacred name in order to make mean profit--away with the sordid hucksters who play with the era of man's hope as though the very name of the blessed time were a catchword to be used like the abominable party-cries of politicians6 ,but when ,i come to men and women who understand the real significance of the day--when ,i come to charitable souls who are reminded of ,one who was all ,charity1 and who gave an impulse to the world which two thousand years have only strengthened--when ,i come among these1 ,i say1 ,give us as much ,yule-tide talk as ever you please1 do your deeds of kindness1 take your fill of innocent merriment1 and deliver us from the pestilence of quacks and mendicants6 ,it is when ,i think of the ghastly horror of our own great central cities that ,i feel at once the praiseworthiness and the hopelessness of all attempts to succour effectually the immense mass of those who need charity4 ,hopeless1 helpless lives are lived by human creatures who are not much above the brutes4 ,alas1 how much may be learned from a journey through the ,midlands6 ,we may talk of merry frosty days and starlit nights and unsullied snow and ,christmas cheer2 but the potter and the iron-worker know as much about cheeriness as they do about stainless snow4 ,then there is ,london to be remembered4 ,a cheery time there will be for the poor creatures who hang about the dock-gates and fight for the chance of earning the price of a meal6 ,in that blank world of hunger and cold and enforced idleness there is nothing that the gayest optimist could describe as joyful1 and some of us will have to face the sight of it during the winter that is now at hand4 ,what can be done8 ,hope seems to have deserted many of our bravest2 we hear the dark note of despair all round1 and it is only the sight of the workers--the kindly workers--that enables us to bear up against deadly depression and dark pessimism4 ,december1 #ahhh4 ,,the ,,fading ,,year4 ,even in this distressed ,england of ours there are still districts where the simple reapers regard the harvest labour as a frolic2 the dulness of their still lives is relieved by a burst of genuine but coarse merriment1 and their abandoned glee is not unpleasant to look upon4 ,then come the harvest suppers--noble spectacles4 ,the steady champ of resolute jaws sounds in a rhythm which is almost majestic2 the fearsome destruction wrought on solid joints would rouse the helpless envy of the dyspeptics of ,pall ,mall1 and the playful consumption of ale--no small beer1 but golden ,rodney--might draw forth an ode from a teetotal ,chancellor of the ,exchequer4 ,august winds up in a blaze of gladness for the reaper4 ,on ordinary evenings he sits stolidly in the dingy parlour and consumes mysterious malt liquor to an accompaniment of grumbling and solemn puffing of acrid tobacco1 but the harvest supper is a wildly luxurious affair which lasts until eleven o'clock4 ,are there not songs too8 ,the village tenor explains--with a powerful accent--that he only desires ,providence to let him like a soldier fall4 ,of course he breaks down1 but there is no adverse criticism4 ,friendly hearers say1 ,do yowe try back1 ,willum1 and catch that up at start agin2 and ,willum does try back in the most excruciating manner4 ,then the elders compare the artist with singers of bygone days1 and a grunting chorus of stories goes on4 ,then comes the inevitable poaching song4 ,probably the singer has been in prison a dozen times over1 but he is regarded as a moral and law-abiding character by his peers2 and even his wife1 who suffered during his occasional periods of seclusion1 smiles as he drones out the jolting chorus4 ,when the sportsman reaches the climax and tells how-- ,we slung her on our shoulders1 ,and went across the down2 ,we took her to a neighbour's house1 ,and sold her for a crown4 ,we sold her for a crown1 my boys1 ,but ,i 'on't tell ye wheer1 ,for 'tis my delight of a shiny night ,in the season of the year --then the gentlemen who have sold many a hare in their time exchange rapturous winks1 and even a head-keeper might be softened by the prevailing enthusiasm4 ,hodge is a hunter by nature1 and you can no more restrain him from poaching than you can restrain a fox4 ,the most popular man in the whole company is the much-incarcerated poacher1 and no disguise whatever is made of the fact4 ,a theft of a twopenny cabbage from a neighbour would set a mark against a man for life2 a mean action performed when the hob-nailed company gather in the tap-room would be remembered for years2 but a sportsman who blackens his face and creeps out at night to net the squire's birds is considered to be a hero1 and an honest man to boot4 ,he mentions his convictions gaily1 criticises the officials of each gaol that he has visited in the capacity of prisoner1 and rouses roars of sympathetic laughter as he tells of his sufferings on the tread-mill4 ,no man or woman thinks of the facts that the squire's pheasants cost about a guinea apiece to rear1 that a hare is worth about three-and-sixpence1 that a brace of partridges brings two shillings even from the cunning receiver who buys the poachers' plunder4 ,no2 they joyously think of the fact that the keepers are diddled1 and that satisfies them4 ,alas1 the glad and sad times alike must die1 and the dull prose of ,october follows hard on the wild jollity of the harvest supper1 while ,winter peers with haggard gaze over ,autumn's shoulder6 ,the hoarse winds blow now1 and the tender flush of decay has begun to touch the leaves with delicate tints4 ,in the morning the gossamer floats in the glittering air and winds ropes of pearls among the stubble2 the level rays shoot over a splendid land1 and the cold light is thrillingly sweet4 ,but the evenings are chill1 and the hollow winds moan1 crying1 ,summer is dead1 and we are the vanguard of ,winter4 ,soon the wild army will be upon you4 ,steal the sunshine while you may4 ,what is the source of that tender solemn melancholy that comes on us all as we feel the glad year dying8 ,it is melancholy that is not painful1 and we can nurse it without tempting one stab of real suffering4 ,each season brings its moods--,spring is hopeful2 ,summer luxurious2 ,autumn contented2 and then comes that strange time when our thoughts run on solemn things4 ,can it be that we associate the long decline of the year with the dark closing of life8 ,surely not--for a boy or girl feels the same pensive1 dreary mood1 and no one who remembers childhood can fail to think of the wild inarticulate thoughts that passed through the immature brain4 ,nay1 our souls are from ,god2 they are bestowed by the ,supreme1 and they were from the beginning1 and cannot be destroyed4 ,from ,plato downwards1 no thoughtful man has missed this strange suggestion which seems to present itself unprompted to every mind4 ,cicero argued it out with consummate dialectic skill2 our scientific men come to the same conclusion after years on years of labour spent in investigating phenomena of life and laws of force2 and ,wordsworth formulated ,plato's reasoning in an immortal passage which seems to combine scientific accuracy with exquisite poetic beauty-- ,our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting2 ,the soul that rises with us--our life's star-- ,hath had elsewhere its setting ,and cometh from afar2 ,not in entire forgetfulness1 ,and not in utter nakedness1 ,but trailing clouds of glory do we come ,from ,god1 ,who is our home4 ,heaven lies about us in our infancy6 ,shades of the prison-house begin to close ,upon the growing boy1 ,but he beholds the light1 and whence it flows2 ,he sees it in his joy4 ,the youth who daily farther from the east ,must travel still is ,nature's priest1 ,and by the vision splendid ,is on his way attended2 ,at length the man perceives it die away ,and fade into the light of coming day4 ,had ,wordsworth never written another line1 that passage would have placed him among the greatest4 ,he follows the glorious burst with these awful lines-- ,but for those obstinate questionings ,of sense and outward things1 ,fallings from us1 vanishings2 ,blank misgivings of a creature ,moving about in worlds not realized2 ,high instincts before which our mortal nature ,did tremble like a guilty thing surprised4 ,that is like some golden-tongued utterance of the gods2 and thousands of ,englishmen1 sceptics and believers1 have held their breath1 abashed1 as its full meaning struck home4 ,yes2 this mysterious thought that haunts our being as we gaze on the saddened fields is not aroused by the immediate impression which the sight gives us2 it is too complex1 too profound1 too mature and significant4 ,it was framed before birth1 and it proceeds direct from the ,father of all souls1 with whom we dwelt before we came to this low earth1 and with whom we shall dwell again4 ,if any one ventures to deny the origin of our marvellous knowledge1 our sweet1 strange impressions1 it seems to us that he must risk bordering on impiety4 ,so far then ,i have wandered from the commonplace sweetness of the shorn fields1 and ,i almost forgot to speak about the birds4 ,watch the swallows as they gather together and talk with their low pretty twitter4 ,their parliament has begun2 and surely no one who watches their proceedings can venture to scoff at the transcendental argument which ,i have just now stated4 ,those swift1 pretty darlings will soon be flying through the pitchy gloom of the night1 and they will dart over three or four thousand miles with unerring aim till they reach the far-off spot where they cheated our winter last year4 ,some will nest amid the tombs of ,egyptian kings1 some will find out rosy haunts in ,persia1 some will soon be wheeling and twittering happily over the sullen breast of the rolling ,niger4 ,who--ah1 who guides that flight8 ,think of it4 ,man must find his way by the stars and the sun4 ,day by day he must use elaborate instruments to find out where his vessel is placed2 and even his instruments do not always save him from miles of error4 ,but the little bird plunges through the high gulfs of air and flies like an arrow to the selfsame spot where it lived before it last went off on the wild quest over shadowy continents and booming seas4 ,hereditary instinct1 says the scientific man4 ,exactly so2 and1 if the swallow unerringly traverses the line crossed by its ancestors1 even though the old land has long been whelmed in steep-down gulfs of the sea1 does not that show us something8 ,does it1 or does it not1 make my saying about the soul seem reasonable8 ,i have followed the swallows1 but the fieldfares and the buntings must also go soon4 ,they will make their way ,south also1 though some may go in leisurely fashion to catch the glorious burst of spring in ,siberia4 ,i have been grievously puzzled and partly delighted by ,mr4 ,seebohm's account of the birds' pilgrimage1 and it has given me hours of thought4 ,we dwell amid mystery1 and1 as the leaves redden year by year1 here recurs one of the chiefest mysteries that ever perplexed the soul of man4 ,indeed1 we are shadowed around with mystery and there is not one red leaf whirled by the wind among those moaning woods which does not represent a miracle4 ,we cannot fly from these shores1 but our joys come each in its day4 ,for pure gladness and keen colour nothing can equal one of these glorious ,october mornings1 when the reddened fronds of the brackens are silvered with rime1 and the sun strikes flashes of delight from them4 ,then come those soft ,november days when the winds moan softly amid the ,aeolian harps of the purple hedgerows1 and the pale drizzle falls ever and again4 ,even then we may pick our pleasures discreetly1 if we dwell in the country1 while1 as for the town1 are there not pleasant fires and merry evenings8 ,then comes the important thought of the poor4 ,ah1 it is woful6 ',pleasant fires and merry evenings1' say you8--so ,i can fancy some pinched sufferer saying1 ,what sort of merry evenings shall we have1 when the fogs crawl murderously1 or the sleet lashes the sodden roads8 ,alas and alas6 ,those of us who dwell amid pleasant sights and sounds are apt in moments of piercing joy to forget the poor who rarely know joy at all4 ,but we must not be careless4 ,by all means let those who can do so snatch their enjoyment from the colour1 the movement1 the picturesque sadness of the fading year2 but let them think with pity of the time that is coming1 and prepare to do a little toward lifting that ghastly burden of suffering that weighs on so many of our fellows4 ,gazing around on the flying shadows driven by the swift wind1 and listening to the quivering sough amid the shaken trees1 ,i have been led far and near into realms of strange speculation4 ,so it is ever in this fearful and wonderful life2 there is not the merest trifle that can happen which will not lead an eager mind away toward the infinite4 ,never has this mystic ordinance touched my soul so poignantly as during the hours when ,i watched for a little the dying of the year1 and branched swiftly into zigzag reflections that touched the mind with fear and joy in turn4 ,adieu1 fair fields6 ,adieu1 wild trees6 ,where will next year's autumn find us8 ,hush6 ,does not the very gold and red of the leaves hint to us that the sweet sad time will return again and find us maybe riper8 ,october1 #ahhf4 ,,behind ,,the ,,veil4 ,men of all castes1 if they fulfil their assigned duties1 enjoy in heaven the highest imperishable bliss4 ,afterwards1 when a man who has fulfilled his duties returns to this world1 he obtains1 by virtue of a remainder of merit1 birth in a distinguished family1 beauty of form1 beauty of complexion1 strength1 aptitude for learning1 wisdom1 wealth1 and the gift of fulfilling the laws of his caste or order4 ,therefore in both worlds he dwells in happiness1 rolling like a wheel from one world to the other4 ,thus the ,brahmans have settled the problem of the life that follows the life on earth4 ,those strange and subtle men seem to have reasoned themselves into a belief in dreams1 and they speak with cool confidence1 as though they were describing scenes as vivid and material as are the crowds in a bazaar4 ,there is no hesitation for them2 they describe the features of the future existence with the dry minuteness of a broker's catalogue4 ,the ,wheel of ,life rolls1 and far above the weary cycle of souls ,buddha rests in an attitude of benediction2 he alone has achieved ,nirvana--he alone is aloof from gods and men4 ,the yearning for immortality has in the case of the ,brahman passed into certainty1 and he describes his heavens and his hells as though the ,all-wise had placed no dim veil between this world and the world beyond4 ,most arithmetically minute are all the ,brahman's pictures1 and he never stops to hint at a doubt4 ,his hells are twenty-two in number1 each applying a new variety of physical and moral pain4 ,we men of the ,west smile at the grotesque dogmatism of the ,orientals2 and yet we have no right to smile4 ,in our way we are as keen about the great question as the ,brahmans are1 and for us the problem of problems may be stated in few words--,is there a future life8 ,all our philosophy1 all our laws1 all our hopes and fears are concerned with that paralyzing question1 and we differ from the ,hindoo only in that we affect an extravagant uncertainty1 while he sincerely professes an absolute certainty4 ,the cultured ,western man pretends to dismiss the problem with a shrug2 he labels himself as an agnostic or by some other vague definition1 and he is fond of proclaiming his idea that he knows and can know nothing4 ,that is a pretence4 ,when the philosopher says that he does not know and does not care what his future may be1 he speaks insincerely2 he means that he cannot prove by experiment the fact of a future life--or1 as ,mr4 ,ruskin puts it1 he declares that he never found ,god in a bottle--but deep down in his soul there is a knowledge that influences his lightest action4 ,the man of science1 the advanced thinker1 or whatever he likes to call himself1 proves to us by his ceaseless protestations of doubt and unbelief that he is incessantly pondering the one subject which he would fain have us fancy he ignores4 ,at heart he is in full sympathy with the ,brahman1 with the rude ,indian1 with the impassioned ,english ,methodist1 with all who cannot shake off the mystic belief in a life that shall go on behind the veil4 ,when the pagan emperor spoke to his own parting soul1 he asked the piercing question that our sceptic must needs put1 whether he like it or no-- ,soul of me1 floating and flitting and fond1 ,thou and this body were life-mates together6 ,wilt thou be gone now--and whither8 ,pallid and naked and cold1 ,not to laugh or be glad as of old6 ,theology of any description is far out of my path1 but ,i have the wish and the right to talk gravely about the subject that dwarfs all others4 ,a logician who tries to scoff away any faith ,i count as almost criminal4 ,mockery is the fume of little hearts1 and the worst and craziest of mockers is the one who grins in presence of a mystery that strikes wise and deep-hearted men with a solemn fear which has in it nothing ignoble4 ,i would as lief play circus pranks by a mother's deathbed as try to find flippant arguments to disturb a sincere faith4 ,first1 then1 let us know what the uncompromising iconoclasts have to tell about the universal belief in immortality4 ,they have a very pretentious line of reasoning1 which ,i may summarise thus4 ,life appeared on earth not less than three hundred thousand years ago4 ,first of all our planet hung in the form of vapour1 and drifted with millions of other similar clouds through space2 then the vapour became liquid2 then the globular form was assumed1 and the flying ball began to rotate round the great attracting body4 ,we cannot tell how living forms first came on earth2 for they could not arise by spontaneous generation1 in spite of all that ,dr4 ,bastian may say4 ,of the coming of life we can say nothing--rather an odd admission1 by-the-way1 for gentlemen who are so sure of most things--but we know that some low organism did appear--and there is an end of that matter4 ,no two organisms can possibly be exactly alike2 and the process of differentiation began in the very shrine4 ,the centuries passed1 and living organisms became more and more complex2 the slowly-cooling ball of the earth was covered with greenery1 but no flower was to be seen4 ,then insects were attracted by brightly-coloured leaves2 then flowers and insects acted and reacted on each other4 ,but there is no need to trace every mark on the scale4 ,it is enough to say that infinitely-diversified forms of life branched off from central stocks1 and the process of variation went on steadily4 ,last of all1 in a strange environment1 a certain small upright creature appeared4 ,he was not much superior in development to the anthropoid apes that we now know--in fact1 there is less difference between an orang and a ,bosjesman than there is between the primitive man and the modern ,caucasian man4 ,this creature1 hairy and brown as a squirrel1 stunted in stature1 skinny of limb1 was our immediate progenitor4 ,so say the confident scientific men4 ,the owner of the queer ape-like skull found at ,neanderthal belonged to a race that was ultimately to develop into ,shakespeares and ,newtons and ,napoleons4 ,in all the enormous series that had its first term in the primeval ooze and its last term in man1 one supreme motive had actuated every individual4 ,the desire of life1 growing more intense with each new development1 was the main influence that secured continuance of life4 ,the beings that had the desire of life scantily developed were overcome in the struggle for existence by those in whom the desire of life was strong4 ,thus in man1 after countless generations1 the wish for life had become the master-power holding dominion over the body4 ,as the various branches of the human race moved upward1 the passionate love of life grew so strong that no individual could bear to think of resigning this pleasing anxious being and proceeding to fall into dumb forgetfulness4 ,men saw their comrades stricken by some dark force that they could not understand4 ,the strong limbs grew lax first1 and then hopelessly stiff2 the bright eye was dulled2 and it soon became necessary to hide the inanimate thing under the soil4 ,it was impossible for those who had the quick blood flowing in their veins to believe that a time would come when feeling would be known no more4 ,this fierce clinging to life had at last its natural outcome4 ,men found that at night1 when the quicksilver current of sleep ran through their veins and their bodies were quiescent1 they had none the less thoughts as of life4 ,the body lay still2 but something in alliance with the body gave them impressions of vivid waking vigour and action4 ,men fancied that they fought1 hunted1 loved1 hated2 and yet all the time their limbs were quiet4 ,what could it be that forced the slumbering man to believe himself to be in full activity8 ,it must be some invisible essence independent of the bones and muscles4 ,therefore when a man died it followed that the body which was buried must have parted permanently from the mystic something that caused dreams4 ,that mystic something therefore lived on after the death of the body4 ,the bodily organs were mere accidental encumbrances2 the real man was the viewless creature that had the visions of the night4 ,the body might go2 but the thing which by and by was named soul was imperishable4 ,i can see the drift of foggy argument4 ,the writer means to say that the belief in immortality sprang up because the wish was father to the thought4 ,men longed to live1 and thus they persuaded themselves that they would live2 and1 one refinement after another having been added to the vague-minded savage's animal yearning1 we have the elaborate system of theology and the reverential faith that guide the lives of civilized human entities4 ,very pretty6 ,then the literary critic steps in and shows how the belief in immortality has been enlarged and elaborated since the days of ,saul1 the son of ,kish4 ,when the witch of ,endor saw gods ascending from the earth1 she was only anticipating the experience of sorcerers who ply their trade in the islands of the ,pacific4 ,professor ,huxley admires the awful description of ,saul's meeting with the witch2 but the ,professor shows that the ,south ,sea islanders also see gods ascending out of the earth1 and he thinks that the ,eastern natives in ,saul's day encouraged a form of ancestor-worship4 ,the literary critic says ancestor-worship is one of the great branches of the religion of mankind4 ,its principles are not difficult to understand1 for they plainly keep up the social relations of the living world4 ,the dead ancestor1 now passed into a deity1 goes on protecting his family and receiving suit and service from them as of old4 ,the dead chief still watches over his own tribe1 still holds his authority by helping friends and harming enemies1 still rewards the right and sharply punishes the wrong4 ,that1 then1 was the kind of worship prevalent in the time of ,saul1 and the gods were only the ancestors of the living4 ,well1 this may be admirable as science1 but1 as ,i summarized the long argument1 ,i felt as though something must give way4 ,then we are told that our sacred book1 the ,old ,testament1 contains no reference to the future life--rather ignores the notion1 in fact4 ,it appears that1 when ,job wrote about the spirit that passed before him and caused all the hair of his flesh to stand up1 he meant an enemy1 or a goat1 or something of that species4 ,moreover1 when it is asserted that ,enoch was not1 for ,god took him1 no reference is made to ,enoch's future existence4 ,the whole of the thesis regarding the ,shadow ,land has been built up little by little1 just as our infinitely perfect bodily organization has been gradually formed4 ,it took at least thirty thousand years to evolve the crystalline lens of the human eye1 and it required many thousands of years to evolve from the crude savagery of the early ,jews the elaborate theories of the modern ,buddhists1 ,islamites1 and ,christians4 ,certainly this same evolution has much to answer for4 ,i utterly fail to see how a wish can give rise to a belief that comes before the wish is framed in the mind4 ,more than this1 ,i know that1 even when human beings crave extinction most--when the prospect of eternal sleep is more than sweet1 when the bare thought of continued existence is a horror--the belief in1 or rather the knowledge of1 immortality is still there1 and the wretch who would fain perish knows that he cannot4 ,as for the mathematically-minded thinkers1 ,i must give them up4 ,they say1 ,here are two objects of consciousness whose existence can be verified2 one we choose to call the body1 the other we call the soul or mind or spirit1 or what you will4 ,the soul may be called a 'function' of the body1 or the body may be called a 'function' of the soul--at any rate1 they vary together4 ,the tiniest change in the body causes a corresponding change in the soul4 ,as the body alters from the days when the little ducts begin to feed the bones with lime up to the days when the bones are brittle and the muscles wither away1 so does the soul alter4 ,the infant's soul is different from the boy's1 the boy's from the adolescent man's1 the young man's from the middle-aged man's1 and so on to the end4 ,now1 since every change in the body1 no matter how infinitesimally small1 is followed by a corresponding change in the soul1 then it is plain that1 when the body becomes extinct1 its 'function1' the soul1 must also become extinct4 ,this is even more appalling than the reasoning of the biologist4 ,but is there not a little flaw somewhere8 ,we take a branch from a privet-hedge and shake it2 some tiny eggs fall down4 ,in time a large ugly caterpillar comes from each egg2 but1 according to the mathematical men1 the caterpillar does not exist1 since the egg has become naught4 ,good6 ,the caterpillar wraps itself in a winding thread1 and we have an egg-shaped lump which lies as still as a pebble4 ,then presently from that bundle of thread there comes a glorious winged creature which flies away1 leaving certain ragged odds and ends4 ,but surely the bundle of threads and the moth were as much connected as the body and the soul8 ,logically1 then1 the moth does not exist after the cocoon is gone1 any more than the soul exists after the body is gone6 ,i feel very unscientific indeed as we put forth this proposition1 and yet perhaps some simple folk will follow me4 ,god will not let the soul die2 it is a force that must act throughout the eternity before us1 as it acted throughout the eternity that preceded our coming on earth4 ,no physical force ever dies--each force merely changes its form or direction4 ,heat becomes motion1 motion is transformed into heat1 but the force still exists4 ,it is not possible then that the soul of man--the subtlest1 strongest force of all--should ever be extinguished4 ,every analogy that we can see1 every fact of science that we can understand1 tells us that the essence which each of us calls ,i must exist for ever as it has existed from eternity4 ,let us think of a sweet change that shall merely divest us of the husk of the body1 even as the moth is divested of the husk of the caterpillar4 ,space will be as nothing to the soul--can we not even now transport ourselves in an instant beyond the sun8 ,we can see with the soul's eye the surface of the stars1 we know what they are made of1 we can weigh them1 and we can prove that our observation is rigidly accurate even though millions of miles lie between us and the object which we describe so confidently4 ,when the body is gone1 the soul will be more free to traverse space than it is even now4 ,february1 #ahhh4 ,extracts from ,reviews of the ,first ,edition4 ,mr4 ,runciman is terribly in earnest in the greater part of this volume1 especially in the several articles on ',drink4' ,he is eminently practical1 withal2 and not satisfied with describing and deploring the effects of drunkenness1 he gives us a recipe which he warrants to cure the most hardened dipsomaniac within a week4 ,we have not quoted even the titles of all ,mr4 ,runciman's essays2 but they are all wholesome in tone1 and show a hearty love of the open air and of outdoor amusement1 in spite of his well-deserved strictures on various forms of so-called 'sport1' while sometimes1 notably in the ,essay on ',genius and ,respectability1' he touches the higher notes of feeling4--,saturday ,review4 ,mr4 ,runciman is intensely earnest1 and directs his arrows with force and precision against those 'joints in our social armour' which his keen vision detects4 ,there is a purpose in all ,mr4 ,runciman says2 and although one cannot always share his enthusiasm or accept his conclusions1 it is impossible to doubt his sincerity as a moral reformer and his zeal in the cause of philanthropy4--,academy4 ,few sermons1 one would fancy1 could do more good than this book1 honestly considered4 ,it speaks plain sense on faults and follies that are usually gently satirised2 and makes fine invigorating reading4 ,the book warmly deserves success4--,scotsman4 ,mr4 ,runciman expresses himself with a vigour which leaves nothing to be desired4 ,he leaves no doubt of what he thinks1--and he thinks1 anyhow1 on the right side4444 ,altogether a very vigorous deliverance4--,spectator4 ,no one can read these pleasant thoughtful essays without being the better for it2 all being written with the vigour and grace for which ,mr4 ,runciman is distinguished4--,newcastle ,daily ,chronicle4 ,essays which form a most important contribution to the literature of social reform4--,methodist ,times4 ,mr4 ,runciman has produced a book which will compel people to read1 and it has many pages which ought to compel them to think1 and to act as well4--,manchester ,examiner4 ,mr4 ,runciman is endowed with a vigorous and pleasing style1 and his facile pen has obviously been made expert by much use4 ,in dealing with some of the more threadbare problems1 such as the drink question and the sporting mania1 he brings considerable novelty and freshness to their treatment1 and when fairly roused he hits out at social abuses with a vigour and indignant sincerity which are very refreshing to the jaded reader 444,he has been successful in producing a delightfully readable book1 and even when he does not produce conviction1 he will certainly succeed in securing attention and inspiring interest4--,bradford ,observer4 ,the essays are a fine contribution in the cause of manly self-culture and elevation of moral tone4--,pall ,mall ,gazette4 ,to those who enjoy essays on current topics1 this will be found an acceptable and instructive volume4--,public ,opinion4 ,his essays are always entertaining and suggestive 444,mr4 ,runciman1 as is well-known1 has a forcible and effective style4--,star4 ,mr4 ,runciman is a bard hitter1 and evidently speaks from conviction1 and there is such an honest and clear-minded tone about these papers1 that even those who do not agree with all the conclusions drawn in them will not regret having read what ,mr4 ,runciman has to say on social questions4--,graphic4